How do i tell my boyfriend im moving
Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada, Earth
2008.03.28 20:26 Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada, Earth
Your go-to for everything happening in Metro Vancouver: news, people, places, events, articles, and discussions. Where the ocean meets the mountains, from the sea to sky.
2016.04.13 22:39 no_turn_unstoned WELCOME TO THE_PACK
THIS IS THE PACK WE'RE FUCKEN BAD ASS AND WE MAKE BOMBASS MEMES!!!!! CUM CRANK YOU'RE HOG IN ARE DISCORD MFER https://discord.gg/3WqqfRM !!!!!!!!!
2014.07.05 03:49 HaudNomen Cat = Dog
A Kevin is someone who consistently or greatly shows a complete lack of intelligence through incompetence of social and societal norms, or is purposefully antagonistic in their poor decision making.
2024.05.14 03:27 Relevant_Word_9888 Do you think this coworker is a real friend?
There's a coworker who i feel like I've become friends with, but at the same time I'm questioning whether or not we are friends. First thing that made me question it was the staff christmas dinner party. I went along to it only for this friend & i told her i was only going for her. We met up & walked inside & sat down & she then decided 10 minutes later she'd move to another table. I was then on my own throughout the whole night. Now she did offer me a seat & i wish i had of taken it, but i didn't want the people on my table to think i was being rude by moving. The seat that was offered to me then got taken. I now know in the future if I'm at a socail gathering & someone moves away who i plan on spending the night with I'm to follow. This friend seen me on my own throughout the night with no one to talk to & i would've thought she would've come back to the table. Another thing that's got me thinking is the way she always talks about her best friend to me. She always tells me how they are hanging out & doing all these things together & maybe I'm jealous because i don't really have any friends since moving to this town. I'm not sure if she's saying it all to rub it in though. What are your thoughts on this?
submitted by Relevant_Word_9888 to socialskills [link] [comments]
2024.05.14 03:26 manic_pixie_dream_ BPD, relationships and cheating
This post is gonna be all over the place but I will try my to write in complete sentences. I'm 22 f (undiagnosed) my partner is 22 male we got together when we were both 19 we moved in after a week of dating cause we were both basically homeless so we got an apartment together. 19 and 20 where really rough ages for us. He cheated on me and was listing after other women and said a bunch of hurtful shit after cheating in attempts to make me feel better because I was blaming myself and my identity specifically about how maybe dying my hair black would make him love me more. This fucked with my self image so fucking much and I'm trying to undo that. And 21 and 22 have been really good years for us we're both happier and healthier but I suspect he my also have undiagnosed BPD or some other personality disorder idk I'm not a psychiatrist but he too has that crazy child hood trauma that makes your brain go weird. I'm rambling but anyways. I keep getting feelings of hurt and sadness coming up almost like ptsd it feels like it's still happening all the time and it used to make me split in a mean way but now I split in a sad way. And it feels like maybe I should leave but then it passes and I'm okay again. Idk what to do we're talking about getting married and buying land together but I'm not sure cause when I do split like this it's so heart breaking. And he tells me all the time he was stupid for the way he acted and what he said was wrong and he only said/did it cause he was young and immature and he know what it means to respect me now but I still feel pain. But he hasn't cheated since that day and he's stopped lusting over other women and he really truly is focused on me I just feel so scared still. I'm wanting to dye my hair back not my natural color but I'm scared he won't love me anymore. He said the only thing that will change is the color of my hair but I'm still scared. Does this get easier with age? Should I stay? I love him so much and he makes me smile every day. I'm just having a lot of big emotions and it's weird cause he'll tell me he was wrong and hug me when I cry about him cheating. How do I move on without breaking up with him? I want to marry him but idk if that's just cause he's my fp or if I actually want to. I can never trust my own emotions like ever and I have panic attacks about this often. I used to split so mean but now when I split I'm anxious or sad. When does this balance out? Why is shadow work so hard? Dying my hair back to my natural color is a form of self love for me and it's very ceremonial but why does it feel so heavy? It feels terrifying. Does this get easier with age?
submitted by manic_pixie_dream_ to BPD [link] [comments]
2024.05.14 03:24 Jumpy-Outcome8656 Girl (F25) and I (M33) at the gym are really hitting it off... but she has a boyfriend. Is this something I should back away from?
So, I wanted to write this a little in depth to give you some context. There is this girl at my gym who her and I had been making elongated eye contact for about a month. Never thought much of it until she started adding in a little smile. This girl is a full blown bodybuilder (she has a competition this weekend), she looks fantastic. I am an amateur bodybuilder myself, have been training for 7 years now. Anyway, I had seen her workout with this skinnier guy from time to time, they talked but it did not seem super intimate.. so I did not know if it was just a friend. 2-3 weeks back, I worked up the courage to talk to her briefly. She kind of blushed, we had a short small talk and I moved on. The next day, I saw her working out with the same guy. I waved at her and she quickly waved and kind of looked down. The guy she was with saw me wave, which I didn't think much of. I saw him later on in the gym and he stared at me extremely intense. A few days later I saw her working out by the free weights. I went and started working out in the general vicinity just to see. Minute or two later she was standing right behind me and when we connected she took her headphones out. To make a long story short.. we ended up talking for 2 hours. Talked about working out, to life, to religion, to where we are from.. talked about a lot. About an hour to hour and a half in she mentioned "her boyfriend"... She mentioned that he came from a very rich family and they don't exactly understand coming from nothing (like she has). That was the only mention of him. Anyway, I figured this long conversation was likely a fluke. Then, last Friday, she came up to me on the treadmill and said she was going to come "bother me". We then proceeded to talk and have another 45 minute conversation. She said things like "oh I didn't tell you!" and (oddly enough she is moving into my apartment complex.. yes, with him..) "oh we should do something", then her voice kind of trailed off as if she knew she shouldn't have said that. I have NOT asked for this girls number or anything on social media. She did ask if I have Instagram and I said no (which is true). My dilemma here is that I really, truly enjoy talking to this girl. We connect in every single way. The conversation flows with ease, we are on the same wavelength, we even have the same beliefs.. it is pretty wild. However, I do not want to find myself disappointed. Do you guys think I am reading into this too far? Do you think that she is simply being friendly and I am catching feelings for someone that does not feel similarly at all? Any advice would be great.
A quick side note.. I went to the gym today and she did come in, I am sure she saw me. She did not come over and say anything and jolted straight to the back. Was a bit odd, but no huge deal. Then 2-3 minutes later I saw her boyfriend come in and head over to her. Made me wonder if she didn't want to get caught up talking to me when she knew he was coming. Not sure.
As I said, really not sure how to play this out. I don't want to get involved in drama.. I truly don't. But it is also a shame when you really hit it off with someone and you aren't sure what to do. Thanks so much for the help.
submitted by Jumpy-Outcome8656 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
A quick side note.. I went to the gym today and she did come in, I am sure she saw me. She did not come over and say anything and jolted straight to the back. Was a bit odd, but no huge deal. Then 2-3 minutes later I saw her boyfriend come in and head over to her. Made me wonder if she didn't want to get caught up talking to me when she knew he was coming. Not sure.
As I said, really not sure how to play this out. I don't want to get involved in drama.. I truly don't. But it is also a shame when you really hit it off with someone and you aren't sure what to do. Thanks so much for the help.
2024.05.14 03:22 NoWin4739 He is still telling his ex he loves her on the phone right next to me so I snapped, AITAH for not caring / being pissed off that they are still friends?
I have been talking with guy for a couple months now and the entire time he has been trying to hang out and telling me I should give him a chance, yada yada. Well, I finally allowed him in, we had an amazing time but at the same time I discovery his “roommate” is actually his girlfriend, well he said there was nothing between them, and that they never slept together or anything, but the more time we spent together the more truth started to come out. I found out they were actually in a relationship not by him being honest, but by seeing the fact he has her saved as baby in his phone. Which made me very, very confused. Again, I asked him several times over if they had been intimate, each time her swore they never have.
Today he says it’s ended with her and he packed his stuff and started moving out, which apparently was very stressful and hectic, fighting the whole time. That was this morning, and now come to find at dinner, he gets a phone call and is talking all casually with someone and when they go to hang up, I hear him say, “I love you, too.” Which immediately caught me off guard like who the fuck was that?! And I just had a feeling, and so I asked “was that her?!” And he was just like yeah like it was no big deal. So now, im even more confused, and it’s starting to sting. He says there is nothing there he doing want her, but he does love her as a friend, eventhough she acts totally psycho and possessive over him and constantly stressing him out and making him miserable. If it wasn’t hurtful and confusing enough as it is, what really REALLY bothering me is he is acting like this is normal behavior and no big deal, most likely thinking I’m just as crazy as that psycho bitch. Because from what he told me, she’s a total psycho. Not only that, it’s so rude to talk on the phone with someone when you hanging out with someone, especially if it’s like a date. We are out to get a nice meal, ready to have a good night out and he gets on a phone call with her. And says I love you to boot! Like wtf is going on right now, my mind is a total mess. So I pretty much exploded telling him why what he is doing and how he is handling it is all kinds of wrong. And he’s just like, it’s nothing, it’s not big deal to him. And after this, I also I finally get him to admit they have slept together. So now I’m just like, well fuck- now I don’t know what is actually true or not now. There no longer a baseline when it comes to knowing this guy and how true to his word he is and my head is a total mess. He promised to never hurt me, yet here we are, only our second day together Im crumbing inside and covered in tears outside. I feel stupid, I feel like I’m nothing but a joke and I’m so. So so. Mad at myself for opening myself up and letting him in. I don’t know what to do, my mind is totally made up on cutting him loose before it gets too serious, but my heart doesn’t want to let go of what it caught a glimpse.
It’s like I finally found everything I ever wanted in a man and we work so well it’s scary. Almost like it’s too good to be true, and now that I said it out loud… yeah jjust shoot me now, because it probably is. It always is. There are no happy ending in my world and I really hate myself right now for losing myself in the moment and forgetting my place in the world.
Was I wrong to snap? I’m not an angry person but it made me snap. Now I’m confused and heartbroken and scared and I don’t know to do… 💔
submitted by NoWin4739 to AITAH [link] [comments]
Today he says it’s ended with her and he packed his stuff and started moving out, which apparently was very stressful and hectic, fighting the whole time. That was this morning, and now come to find at dinner, he gets a phone call and is talking all casually with someone and when they go to hang up, I hear him say, “I love you, too.” Which immediately caught me off guard like who the fuck was that?! And I just had a feeling, and so I asked “was that her?!” And he was just like yeah like it was no big deal. So now, im even more confused, and it’s starting to sting. He says there is nothing there he doing want her, but he does love her as a friend, eventhough she acts totally psycho and possessive over him and constantly stressing him out and making him miserable. If it wasn’t hurtful and confusing enough as it is, what really REALLY bothering me is he is acting like this is normal behavior and no big deal, most likely thinking I’m just as crazy as that psycho bitch. Because from what he told me, she’s a total psycho. Not only that, it’s so rude to talk on the phone with someone when you hanging out with someone, especially if it’s like a date. We are out to get a nice meal, ready to have a good night out and he gets on a phone call with her. And says I love you to boot! Like wtf is going on right now, my mind is a total mess. So I pretty much exploded telling him why what he is doing and how he is handling it is all kinds of wrong. And he’s just like, it’s nothing, it’s not big deal to him. And after this, I also I finally get him to admit they have slept together. So now I’m just like, well fuck- now I don’t know what is actually true or not now. There no longer a baseline when it comes to knowing this guy and how true to his word he is and my head is a total mess. He promised to never hurt me, yet here we are, only our second day together Im crumbing inside and covered in tears outside. I feel stupid, I feel like I’m nothing but a joke and I’m so. So so. Mad at myself for opening myself up and letting him in. I don’t know what to do, my mind is totally made up on cutting him loose before it gets too serious, but my heart doesn’t want to let go of what it caught a glimpse.
It’s like I finally found everything I ever wanted in a man and we work so well it’s scary. Almost like it’s too good to be true, and now that I said it out loud… yeah jjust shoot me now, because it probably is. It always is. There are no happy ending in my world and I really hate myself right now for losing myself in the moment and forgetting my place in the world.
Was I wrong to snap? I’m not an angry person but it made me snap. Now I’m confused and heartbroken and scared and I don’t know to do… 💔
2024.05.14 03:18 ExplanationNormal195 How do I tell my family I'm back with my ex?
I've reconnected with my oldest child's father who I loved very much and was heart broken when spilt over 30 years ago due to circumstances. He was very young and not mature enough to handle becoming a father. We broke up when I was pregnant but got back together after then broke up a few months later. He was and is my first love. I never judged nor caused parental alienation or said anything bad about him. he just disappeared from our lives. I got on with my life got married and had another child and divorced my ex-husband due to his cheating and gambling addiction. Again I never stopped him from seeing our child even though he was a terrible husband and awful provider he was and is my child's father and he learned to earn the title dad in the last 7 years. Now my oldest child's father came back into our oldest life after getting married and having his own family and realised how much he missed out on due to his fear and possibly parental pressure to split with us as he was an only child and I was older than him. He paid back payment child support and maintenance until he was 18. They really connected a few years later to which I've encouraged and I'm so glad and grateful for advice I was given in keeping that door opened for their relationship. Now the ex boyfriend has been divorced for some years and we just vibe the same way as before. We are friends lovers and confidants. He is the right person but we met at the wrong time. I love who we are now as people, I have no regrets for the past because of we have kids from other relationships. How do we go about telling all our kids that we love and want to be together ❤️
submitted by ExplanationNormal195 to TrueOffMyChest [link] [comments]
2024.05.14 03:18 baphometiswatching Am I emotionally cheating on my boyfriend?
TL;DR : I've been in love with another guy since 7 years but don't have contact with him anymore. How can I get rid of my feelings?
Hello Reddit, I don't usually post anything but I would love to have some advice.
I (19F) have a boyfriend (25M), soon to be husband. At first I wanna say, please don't comment about my boyfriend's age or my age since this is not the topic, I really don't need more people to tell me we have a large age gap.
In the beginning of the relationship, everything was quite normal but a few days ago I started thinking about a guy, let's call him L, I met when I was 12 and he was 13. It was on the Internet. I fell in love with L and he did too but at some point he lost interest since I waited too long to tell him. I mean we we're children. It's not that deep. We stayed in contact though, which was always very complicated since L was a pretty mean guy and I'm a really sensitive person. We used to argue really often about things he has said like "you're fat" or "you're not really that pretty" (I was a rather skinny, medium pretty girl back then).
He was always very mysterious when it came to his voice or his face. Never showed his face, never seen his face. At this point I haven't heard L's voice yet and I was still very in love with him. As we grew older the arguing continued and we blocked each other multiple times just to crawl back to each other after a month or two, sometimes half a year. This went on until I was about 16 and he was 17, we actually had a flowing conversation over phone (I called him) and we enjoyed it both a lot, but things went down south quickly when I told L I still had feelings for him after all this time. We argued again and we blocked each other again, but this time we put an end to it. I changed my number. L did too. Now it's impossible to get in contact ever again.
Now it's been 7 years and I'm still so in love with this guy. I've never even seen his face. I feel bad for my boyfriend because L is not in my life anymore and honestly I don't want him back. My boyfriend loves me so much and he always tries hard to make me happy. I feel like I'm cheating. What do y'all think of this? Am I in the wrong? Is it possible to be in love for so long? And how can I get rid of my feelings?
submitted by baphometiswatching to relationships [link] [comments]
Hello Reddit, I don't usually post anything but I would love to have some advice.
I (19F) have a boyfriend (25M), soon to be husband. At first I wanna say, please don't comment about my boyfriend's age or my age since this is not the topic, I really don't need more people to tell me we have a large age gap.
In the beginning of the relationship, everything was quite normal but a few days ago I started thinking about a guy, let's call him L, I met when I was 12 and he was 13. It was on the Internet. I fell in love with L and he did too but at some point he lost interest since I waited too long to tell him. I mean we we're children. It's not that deep. We stayed in contact though, which was always very complicated since L was a pretty mean guy and I'm a really sensitive person. We used to argue really often about things he has said like "you're fat" or "you're not really that pretty" (I was a rather skinny, medium pretty girl back then).
He was always very mysterious when it came to his voice or his face. Never showed his face, never seen his face. At this point I haven't heard L's voice yet and I was still very in love with him. As we grew older the arguing continued and we blocked each other multiple times just to crawl back to each other after a month or two, sometimes half a year. This went on until I was about 16 and he was 17, we actually had a flowing conversation over phone (I called him) and we enjoyed it both a lot, but things went down south quickly when I told L I still had feelings for him after all this time. We argued again and we blocked each other again, but this time we put an end to it. I changed my number. L did too. Now it's impossible to get in contact ever again.
Now it's been 7 years and I'm still so in love with this guy. I've never even seen his face. I feel bad for my boyfriend because L is not in my life anymore and honestly I don't want him back. My boyfriend loves me so much and he always tries hard to make me happy. I feel like I'm cheating. What do y'all think of this? Am I in the wrong? Is it possible to be in love for so long? And how can I get rid of my feelings?
2024.05.14 03:17 bugluvr81 How should I(20f) tell my boyfriend(20m) I was raped?
TW: detailed SA
To preface this, I was manipulated and abused by a boy when I was 13. During this time my mom abandoned me with my dad and I was in an extremely vulnerable position emotionally. I had just left foster care as well and had really never experienced real love or attention.
That was until I met a boy in my grade(7th grade), who immediately started complimenting me and approaching me sexually. He would send me other girls nudes, who were also our age, saying it was normal to send nudes even though I didn't want to. He endlessly pressured me into sending nudes by saying he was going to hurt himself or even kill himself. He pressured me into dating him and I ended up "dating" him for the next 9 months. On our first date he immediately got me away from my mom and kissed me and grabbed my chest and immediately starting putting his hand down my underwear. I pushed him off of me and my mom immediately turned the corner to find us. She ended up essentially dropping off the face of the earth less than a week later.
After this "date," we continued to text and he wanted to know when I'd be ready for sex. He wanted me to sext with him and I physically couldn't I was just 13 and too awkward to. He'd get extremely mad and end up sexting other girls just to send me screenshots of their messages and nudes. For some reason I thought this was normal. I told him I wouldn't feel ready for sex until I was at least 14, but a month into dating he came over to my house with 2 of our friends. Our 2 friends went upstairs and we stayed in my room, he forced himself onto me after we had been kissing. He pulled down my pants and I said no and he begun raping me I cried and said no and that it hurt but he still continued. When he finished, he had blood on his hands which he wiped off and we went upstairs to be with our friends. I told him it wasnt normal and it hurt and there was blood on his hands but he showed me a porn of how virgins usually bleed so I thought it was normal.
I continued dating him, I thought this whole thing was normal so we had more sex and do sexual things. I went on a trip with him and his family a few months later even and while there he strangled me. I was in the middle of rambling about some show I was interested in and he wrapped both hands around my neck and squeezed so hard. I just looked into his eyes and gasped and he had no emotion on his face at all. He ended up breaking up with me a few months later blaming my poor mental health.
Months after that I started piecing together that what happened wasn't normal. I would look at the spot on the ground where it happened in my room and get flashbacks. Even though we had "broken up" we were still texting and I told him that I didnt want what had happened that day. I also took a sex ed class after it had happened and realized technically it had been rape. I told him my concerns and he admitted that what had happened wasn't right. I dont remember what happened to make me so angry at him that I went to our school counselors and reported him, but he did something to aggravate me? There was a police investigation but I dropped charges due to already having to go to court like every month for the past year for foster care complications and getting a restraining order on my mom. He ended up moving schools soon after and I moved 100 miles away the following year.
Fast forward, I've been dating my boyfriend for almost a year and we live together. We're both broke students but we really love each other. He was in a car accident last week that totaled his car, he was physically fine but taken away by an ambulance and in the hospital for the rest of the day. The doctors were worried there might be spine or head trauma/damage and I've never been so worried in my life. He ended up fine but I realized that I really want to spend a good portion of my life with this man, possibly even have kids. He's my only family really and he's amazing, imagining him injured or worse made me lose my mind at the hospital.
He knows a lot about my trauma, my mom ended up dying so he's comforted me through that as well as listening to all the horrible things I've experienced. I've mentioned there's one thing I can't talk about which is this. I physically cannot bring any of this up to him and I can't even say the word rape out loud. He's assured me I can tell him whenever I feel ready but I don't know how to admit these things unless he asks me very specific questions about it which obviously I cant expect.
He's very gentle with me but sometimes I feel myself disassociated during sex and get flashbacks to what happened. I just want him to understand what happened but I don't even know how to begin the conversation.
If anyone has advice on how I bring this up to him it would be very appreciated.
submitted by bugluvr81 to Advice [link] [comments]
To preface this, I was manipulated and abused by a boy when I was 13. During this time my mom abandoned me with my dad and I was in an extremely vulnerable position emotionally. I had just left foster care as well and had really never experienced real love or attention.
That was until I met a boy in my grade(7th grade), who immediately started complimenting me and approaching me sexually. He would send me other girls nudes, who were also our age, saying it was normal to send nudes even though I didn't want to. He endlessly pressured me into sending nudes by saying he was going to hurt himself or even kill himself. He pressured me into dating him and I ended up "dating" him for the next 9 months. On our first date he immediately got me away from my mom and kissed me and grabbed my chest and immediately starting putting his hand down my underwear. I pushed him off of me and my mom immediately turned the corner to find us. She ended up essentially dropping off the face of the earth less than a week later.
After this "date," we continued to text and he wanted to know when I'd be ready for sex. He wanted me to sext with him and I physically couldn't I was just 13 and too awkward to. He'd get extremely mad and end up sexting other girls just to send me screenshots of their messages and nudes. For some reason I thought this was normal. I told him I wouldn't feel ready for sex until I was at least 14, but a month into dating he came over to my house with 2 of our friends. Our 2 friends went upstairs and we stayed in my room, he forced himself onto me after we had been kissing. He pulled down my pants and I said no and he begun raping me I cried and said no and that it hurt but he still continued. When he finished, he had blood on his hands which he wiped off and we went upstairs to be with our friends. I told him it wasnt normal and it hurt and there was blood on his hands but he showed me a porn of how virgins usually bleed so I thought it was normal.
I continued dating him, I thought this whole thing was normal so we had more sex and do sexual things. I went on a trip with him and his family a few months later even and while there he strangled me. I was in the middle of rambling about some show I was interested in and he wrapped both hands around my neck and squeezed so hard. I just looked into his eyes and gasped and he had no emotion on his face at all. He ended up breaking up with me a few months later blaming my poor mental health.
Months after that I started piecing together that what happened wasn't normal. I would look at the spot on the ground where it happened in my room and get flashbacks. Even though we had "broken up" we were still texting and I told him that I didnt want what had happened that day. I also took a sex ed class after it had happened and realized technically it had been rape. I told him my concerns and he admitted that what had happened wasn't right. I dont remember what happened to make me so angry at him that I went to our school counselors and reported him, but he did something to aggravate me? There was a police investigation but I dropped charges due to already having to go to court like every month for the past year for foster care complications and getting a restraining order on my mom. He ended up moving schools soon after and I moved 100 miles away the following year.
Fast forward, I've been dating my boyfriend for almost a year and we live together. We're both broke students but we really love each other. He was in a car accident last week that totaled his car, he was physically fine but taken away by an ambulance and in the hospital for the rest of the day. The doctors were worried there might be spine or head trauma/damage and I've never been so worried in my life. He ended up fine but I realized that I really want to spend a good portion of my life with this man, possibly even have kids. He's my only family really and he's amazing, imagining him injured or worse made me lose my mind at the hospital.
He knows a lot about my trauma, my mom ended up dying so he's comforted me through that as well as listening to all the horrible things I've experienced. I've mentioned there's one thing I can't talk about which is this. I physically cannot bring any of this up to him and I can't even say the word rape out loud. He's assured me I can tell him whenever I feel ready but I don't know how to admit these things unless he asks me very specific questions about it which obviously I cant expect.
He's very gentle with me but sometimes I feel myself disassociated during sex and get flashbacks to what happened. I just want him to understand what happened but I don't even know how to begin the conversation.
If anyone has advice on how I bring this up to him it would be very appreciated.
2024.05.14 03:16 KingGiuba My mother doesn't believe me and is waiting for the doctors to tell her if I'm non binary
And I doubt she'll trust them anyways.
Bit of context: I'm non binary (25yo) and come out to most of my family, no one uses my new name and correct pronouns because it would be a mess with my dad and grandma (and I'm the one that choose not to change things for now) but there are some people that would switch to what I want in a heartbeat if I asked them, and that is enough for me to know I can trust them with my gender, and I feel validated by other things they told me. Other relatives don't understand it and I doubt will ever call me anything different than my birth name, but I understand I can't have everything and that's ok. My mum tho... She's a whole other story. Also, I'm italian, so I hope everything makes sense.
I've been in lists for bloodwork and other exams and psychology assesments (like dysphoria diagnosis) in order to see the endocrinologist and get HRT, my mother knows I'm non binary and I told her and tried to explain to her many times (even once with my therapist, and my therapist agrees with me that it's like talking to a wall). I also told her I'm doing these HRT things and she said she would help in looking for doctors and driving me to the appointments but that I had to come up with the money for the visits myself (oh, nice, thanks mum /s).
One day, late on the evening, she calls me and tells me
It was awful, that "if you're looking for yourself" was totally unexpected to me because I never had doubts since I told my therapist and that was months ago, and I was questioning for around 3 years already, and I never make a choice without thinking and I never wagered about wanting HRT a being non binary with my mother, so it's all her own mind that made this shit up. I'm tired.
This happened a while ago but I'm still very angry at her, I'm reaching a place where I know I won't be able to forgive her and it makes me actually feel better, at least I'll feel less guilty when I'll go little to no contact.
This is a rant about other stuff that I feel it's related but not specific about gender: I'm pretty sure about the thing that she doesn't believe I'm non binary because she didn't believe I was depressed either, just like she doesn't believe I am probably autistic (my psychologist also agrees with me) and doesn't listen to me when I tell her that I'm still in depression/autistic burnout and it's fucking hard to wake up in the morning, so how the fuck could I keep a job? Luckily my country has public healthcare, it's like €20/36 every visit - even if long waiting lists- so I can probably manage with some tutoring I do to some kids (plus, luckily my aunt understans me and would pay for it). But mother is very pushy to me about the fact that I need a job, even when I told her that in order to heal from autistic burnout I literally have to NOT have responsibilities and take them back slowly or I get overwhelmed and relapse right away (I know ot, I tried). And as responsibility I mean even dumb shit like brushing my teeth, I swear to god I'd never curse anyone to feel as hopeless as I do and as useless, but she can't understand me and doesn't believe me, it's like I'm a kid all over again and whatever I say had the same importance as a riffle of wind, unremarkable and unimportant.
TLDR: My mum is an asshole and thinks I'm mentally ill and that's why I want HRT. I actually am mentally ill (depression and autistic burnout) but that's BECAUSE I haven't been formally diagnosed all my life (CPTSD, dysphoria and probably both autism and ADHD). Plus, she doesn't want to pay for my HRT visits, and that would be like € 100/180 btw.
submitted by KingGiuba to NonBinary [link] [comments]
Bit of context: I'm non binary (25yo) and come out to most of my family, no one uses my new name and correct pronouns because it would be a mess with my dad and grandma (and I'm the one that choose not to change things for now) but there are some people that would switch to what I want in a heartbeat if I asked them, and that is enough for me to know I can trust them with my gender, and I feel validated by other things they told me. Other relatives don't understand it and I doubt will ever call me anything different than my birth name, but I understand I can't have everything and that's ok. My mum tho... She's a whole other story. Also, I'm italian, so I hope everything makes sense.
I've been in lists for bloodwork and other exams and psychology assesments (like dysphoria diagnosis) in order to see the endocrinologist and get HRT, my mother knows I'm non binary and I told her and tried to explain to her many times (even once with my therapist, and my therapist agrees with me that it's like talking to a wall). I also told her I'm doing these HRT things and she said she would help in looking for doctors and driving me to the appointments but that I had to come up with the money for the visits myself (oh, nice, thanks mum /s).
One day, late on the evening, she calls me and tells me
I can't take you to get the bloodwork the day after tomorrow, can I cancel it and take it a bit later?I was pretty exhausted so I said "yeah it's ok", without thinking much about it because I figured those appointments can be max in a week time waiting list, so I was fine with waiting that bit more. The next morning she calls me and had taken it A MONTH AND A WEEK LATER (she choose the date) and I was crushed, but I manged to understand my feeling, and that I wasn't ok with that at all, only in the evening. I texted her asking to move it sooner or I'd do it myself, that it was too much time and I just can't wait anymore (I was being kinda dramatic bc there are still months before other assessments, but it felt like my life depended on it). She was like
ok but don't take it soon you'll have to move it again and pay again It's not like you're paying for it anywaysThen she kept insisting to postpone and similar stuff so I asked her
do you even want to help me? Might be just my feeling, but it feels like you're always putting yourself in my way even when you're saying the contraryShe got defensive and started saying her usual stuff like that I'm not grateful and I'm so bad at keeping the house clean and she doesn't even make me feel bad about the fact that I don't work or study (this is a lie, she does) and so I asked her
Ok, so can I ask you something easy to do to show me you want to help? Can you call me by my chosen name and pronouns when we're alone?She didn't answer and kept going on with other arguments, I reiterated but she kept avoiding the question, she instead said that
Whoever you are. If you're looking for yourself. I don't call you in any way, person.Don't mind how weird it sounds, she speaks weird in italian too, but that "if you're looking for yourself" and the fact that she'd rather call me "person" than my chosen name was horrible, it made me understand - coupled with other stuff she said before about me "being sick and needing the right medical path" - that she's just waiting for the doctors to see if I'm sick and stop me from getting HRT... When I first talked to her about HRT she was talking about the fact that I'm fat, about a surgery I had that could stop me from it, about the fact that she has a genetic disease that might stop me from it etc... And it could have been read as worry before, as being cautious and wanting to check all the possibilities so I don't have sad surprises after I start HRT... But it never was that, not even a bit, it was just a way to control my visits and send me to the path of failure (in her eyes, ofc psychologists would know better than not giving me HRT).
It was awful, that "if you're looking for yourself" was totally unexpected to me because I never had doubts since I told my therapist and that was months ago, and I was questioning for around 3 years already, and I never make a choice without thinking and I never wagered about wanting HRT a being non binary with my mother, so it's all her own mind that made this shit up. I'm tired.
This happened a while ago but I'm still very angry at her, I'm reaching a place where I know I won't be able to forgive her and it makes me actually feel better, at least I'll feel less guilty when I'll go little to no contact.
This is a rant about other stuff that I feel it's related but not specific about gender: I'm pretty sure about the thing that she doesn't believe I'm non binary because she didn't believe I was depressed either, just like she doesn't believe I am probably autistic (my psychologist also agrees with me) and doesn't listen to me when I tell her that I'm still in depression/autistic burnout and it's fucking hard to wake up in the morning, so how the fuck could I keep a job? Luckily my country has public healthcare, it's like €20/36 every visit - even if long waiting lists- so I can probably manage with some tutoring I do to some kids (plus, luckily my aunt understans me and would pay for it). But mother is very pushy to me about the fact that I need a job, even when I told her that in order to heal from autistic burnout I literally have to NOT have responsibilities and take them back slowly or I get overwhelmed and relapse right away (I know ot, I tried). And as responsibility I mean even dumb shit like brushing my teeth, I swear to god I'd never curse anyone to feel as hopeless as I do and as useless, but she can't understand me and doesn't believe me, it's like I'm a kid all over again and whatever I say had the same importance as a riffle of wind, unremarkable and unimportant.
TLDR: My mum is an asshole and thinks I'm mentally ill and that's why I want HRT. I actually am mentally ill (depression and autistic burnout) but that's BECAUSE I haven't been formally diagnosed all my life (CPTSD, dysphoria and probably both autism and ADHD). Plus, she doesn't want to pay for my HRT visits, and that would be like € 100/180 btw.
2024.05.14 03:15 finneganstrikesagain how do I (18/Male) come out to my family?
just like the title states, I want to come out to my family. I am a transsex male, it's been a long time struggling to come to terms with. I have been discussing with my therapist and other professionals of my concerns for several years now. I have also been doing things to transition or pass more, cutting hair, binding, packing. but its all been hidden or subtle as I did not want my family knowing.
now I am prepared to come out, I want to tell them what I am dealing with and how I am going to treat it moving forwards. hoping they will accept me and be alright with my transition. my family has a few LGBT people but no trans ones. they seem to be mostly accepting but they also tend to say things like trans is a trend that people grow out of.
I'm not sure how to go about this. Do I bring it up over dinner, send a text message, call each person, what do I do? how do I prepare for any possible emotional pain if I am rejected?
submitted by finneganstrikesagain to Advice [link] [comments]
now I am prepared to come out, I want to tell them what I am dealing with and how I am going to treat it moving forwards. hoping they will accept me and be alright with my transition. my family has a few LGBT people but no trans ones. they seem to be mostly accepting but they also tend to say things like trans is a trend that people grow out of.
I'm not sure how to go about this. Do I bring it up over dinner, send a text message, call each person, what do I do? how do I prepare for any possible emotional pain if I am rejected?
2024.05.14 03:14 SyrenNyx Missouri contractors work hours in a lived in property???
Yo ik this sub is going dark soon but I'm at a loss and hoping for some input to direct me on how to find the information or anything really.
Q: how long can a landlord have contractors working in a property that's actively lived in?. Like is there acceptable business hours?
Edit: we live in Missouri Montgomery county
Basically my fiancee and I live in a shared living space. A duplex if u will. Tbh it's a trailer with an addition. Both spaces have a bedroom and a living room with shared kitchen. Possibly a shared bathroom but It wasn't part of the original agreement.
So our old "roommate" a crackhead who stole a lot from us. Finally got kicked out after a year + of not paying. She let him stay so long bc we where paying. Rediculous in my mind but that's beside the point rn.
The landlord wanted to "remodel" a lot of stuff when he moved out 2 months ago. She didn't do anything for the first month and a half. A few days ago she says our new roomie is moving in this Thursday. And she's been trying to "redo" it all in the 11 days. She's been very irregular in providing notice often telling us at 7-10pm that's she or her "handyman" will be here at 8am. Only once have we denied entry bc of lack of notice. The real issue is that she's wanting us to let the handyman in before we leave for our jobs. Leaving him here with all our stuff and free access to all but the locked bedroom (pets I don't want to be lost)
Today we had to leave a key out for him to come in at 8 am while we slept. (we both work nights and this was the easiest solution) so he came in at 8am. Around 9am the landlady came in to (save money and paint herself) w.e. it's our day off so we slept till 4pm to make up sleep. At 2pm she left and texts my man that the handyman will be working a bit longer to get some stuff done bc she's pressed for time (why'd u wait a month before doing anything. And set a date for the new tenant if u weren't ready??) at 7pm we called and asked her how much longer he was going to be working. He's hammering all day. And the paint thinner is so strong in the house I threw up as soon as I woke up. Both of us have headaches. No windows open or anything. Anyway at 7 she says she'll talk to him. My man left the room (we've been hiding from the smell) and heard him answer the phone and talk to her.... And 45 min later he's still working with no sign of stopping. So my man goes and asks him.dudes A little rude says the landlord never called and is mad. Whatever. He finally leaves at 8pm.
Also I'd like to mention the handyman had his woman helping him (fine) and his two young children in the car. They keep going in and out of our house to talk to Mom and dad. (Not fine)
That's the exact reason why I don't want to leave some random handyman in the house as long as he wants when we work nights. Like he could be bringing them here to sleep and leave before we get home and we'd never know.
Also mentioning how we have black mold but it's more important to her to remodel then to fix the black mold.
So how long can a landlord have contractors working in a property that's actively lived in?. Like is there acceptable business hours?
submitted by SyrenNyx to TenantHelp [link] [comments]
Q: how long can a landlord have contractors working in a property that's actively lived in?. Like is there acceptable business hours?
Edit: we live in Missouri Montgomery county
Basically my fiancee and I live in a shared living space. A duplex if u will. Tbh it's a trailer with an addition. Both spaces have a bedroom and a living room with shared kitchen. Possibly a shared bathroom but It wasn't part of the original agreement.
So our old "roommate" a crackhead who stole a lot from us. Finally got kicked out after a year + of not paying. She let him stay so long bc we where paying. Rediculous in my mind but that's beside the point rn.
The landlord wanted to "remodel" a lot of stuff when he moved out 2 months ago. She didn't do anything for the first month and a half. A few days ago she says our new roomie is moving in this Thursday. And she's been trying to "redo" it all in the 11 days. She's been very irregular in providing notice often telling us at 7-10pm that's she or her "handyman" will be here at 8am. Only once have we denied entry bc of lack of notice. The real issue is that she's wanting us to let the handyman in before we leave for our jobs. Leaving him here with all our stuff and free access to all but the locked bedroom (pets I don't want to be lost)
Today we had to leave a key out for him to come in at 8 am while we slept. (we both work nights and this was the easiest solution) so he came in at 8am. Around 9am the landlady came in to (save money and paint herself) w.e. it's our day off so we slept till 4pm to make up sleep. At 2pm she left and texts my man that the handyman will be working a bit longer to get some stuff done bc she's pressed for time (why'd u wait a month before doing anything. And set a date for the new tenant if u weren't ready??) at 7pm we called and asked her how much longer he was going to be working. He's hammering all day. And the paint thinner is so strong in the house I threw up as soon as I woke up. Both of us have headaches. No windows open or anything. Anyway at 7 she says she'll talk to him. My man left the room (we've been hiding from the smell) and heard him answer the phone and talk to her.... And 45 min later he's still working with no sign of stopping. So my man goes and asks him.dudes A little rude says the landlord never called and is mad. Whatever. He finally leaves at 8pm.
Also I'd like to mention the handyman had his woman helping him (fine) and his two young children in the car. They keep going in and out of our house to talk to Mom and dad. (Not fine)
That's the exact reason why I don't want to leave some random handyman in the house as long as he wants when we work nights. Like he could be bringing them here to sleep and leave before we get home and we'd never know.
Also mentioning how we have black mold but it's more important to her to remodel then to fix the black mold.
So how long can a landlord have contractors working in a property that's actively lived in?. Like is there acceptable business hours?
2024.05.14 03:14 DarkestGemeni Broke up with my bpd partner
I’ve been lurking here for a few years, trying to find ways to deal with my partners extreme mood swings and anger. This is my first post, so if that’s inappropriate, I’m sorry. I'm also sorry if the tone of this post is inappropriate, I just need to get it off my chest with people who may have experienced similar things. I want to also clarify that I know Bpd doesn’t MAKE you an ass, my ex just loved to use his diagnosis as a reason to abuse me and not take accountability for it.
He has a 9/9 presentation and it was constantly taken out on me. For 10 years. I feel like a few months ago I finally got the ick for how he was treating me and then eventually reached my boiling point and we had a blow-out fight a few days ago where I finally screamed and yelled at him. I really got in his face and didn’t let him not respond and just kept yelling. Then when he acted upset and hurt and “scared” by it I quoted him directly and went ”Oh, so I’m just NEVER allowed to be ANGRY?? Can’t ever have a negative emotion?” and he seemed to really not understand that that’s what he says about twice a week while he slams shit around the house and terrifies our pets and me. I can’t tell you how nice it was to let it all out. I don’t even care that I have to pack up 26 years of shit in 30 days because I just feel so awesome about not getting treated like that every day and waking up at 7am to him already being a whiny baby about nothing.
I feel so free. I don’t know that I’ve ever felt this relaxed and content in my life. I feel like I was developing more bpd symptoms the longer I endured his treatment and it already feels like it's melting away because I'm just out. I’m not paranoid anymore (cheated on me constantly - my friends literally think his secret gf is pregnant and that’s why he was fucking with me so bad the last few weeks 😂 to get me out of the house and move her in) I feel good about my body, I’m sleeping better than I have in years, and not to be nsfw, but without someone pawing at me 24 hours a day and constantly being vulgar towards me I FINALLY feel like my sex drive is coming back. I’ve literally only been out of his house for like 3 days and I already feel like that was months ago. I’m hanging out with new friends and enjoying going on nature walks and exercising without someone leering at me and trying to touch me. I’m excited to see what life is like away from the abuse he put me through constantly. I’m excited to just not be treated like shit and then get blamed for it cause he “can’t help it with his Bpd!” But then also won’t to therapy regularly, won’t take meds, won’t even do a goddamn work book on his own cause it’s “too hard” - as if being around someone who regularly acted like he couldn’t stand me was easy. Literally the only part about this I’m currently feeling negative about is the 3 pets who are used to me being home almost all the time and him working 12 hour shifts + sleep gives him maybe a few hours to care for them properly daily. They will suffer and be lonely and he will probably keep staying out til 2am anyways to get plastered with his divorced alcoholic “friend”that he claims to hate and cut off but always crawls back to, probably because he’s so similar to my exs own mother.
Everything just feels so exciting. I get to find a new place to live and decorate and unpack and organize only how I want to - nothing has to go on top shelves where I can’t reach. I can read without someone saying I’m “intentionally trying to seem busy so we can’t talk” I can watch tv shows and movies without someone walking in and getting butthurt cause they wanna watch it, too, now that I’m 4 seasons in or whatever. I can wear whatever I feel like and no one’s going to be gross about it in my own home. I don’t have to worry when he’s out with friends that they’re talking shit about me and instigating a fight without me even knowing - this spineless and easily swayed, angry man is gone from my life and I am FREE
submitted by DarkestGemeni to BPDPartners [link] [comments]
He has a 9/9 presentation and it was constantly taken out on me. For 10 years. I feel like a few months ago I finally got the ick for how he was treating me and then eventually reached my boiling point and we had a blow-out fight a few days ago where I finally screamed and yelled at him. I really got in his face and didn’t let him not respond and just kept yelling. Then when he acted upset and hurt and “scared” by it I quoted him directly and went ”Oh, so I’m just NEVER allowed to be ANGRY?? Can’t ever have a negative emotion?” and he seemed to really not understand that that’s what he says about twice a week while he slams shit around the house and terrifies our pets and me. I can’t tell you how nice it was to let it all out. I don’t even care that I have to pack up 26 years of shit in 30 days because I just feel so awesome about not getting treated like that every day and waking up at 7am to him already being a whiny baby about nothing.
I feel so free. I don’t know that I’ve ever felt this relaxed and content in my life. I feel like I was developing more bpd symptoms the longer I endured his treatment and it already feels like it's melting away because I'm just out. I’m not paranoid anymore (cheated on me constantly - my friends literally think his secret gf is pregnant and that’s why he was fucking with me so bad the last few weeks 😂 to get me out of the house and move her in) I feel good about my body, I’m sleeping better than I have in years, and not to be nsfw, but without someone pawing at me 24 hours a day and constantly being vulgar towards me I FINALLY feel like my sex drive is coming back. I’ve literally only been out of his house for like 3 days and I already feel like that was months ago. I’m hanging out with new friends and enjoying going on nature walks and exercising without someone leering at me and trying to touch me. I’m excited to see what life is like away from the abuse he put me through constantly. I’m excited to just not be treated like shit and then get blamed for it cause he “can’t help it with his Bpd!” But then also won’t to therapy regularly, won’t take meds, won’t even do a goddamn work book on his own cause it’s “too hard” - as if being around someone who regularly acted like he couldn’t stand me was easy. Literally the only part about this I’m currently feeling negative about is the 3 pets who are used to me being home almost all the time and him working 12 hour shifts + sleep gives him maybe a few hours to care for them properly daily. They will suffer and be lonely and he will probably keep staying out til 2am anyways to get plastered with his divorced alcoholic “friend”that he claims to hate and cut off but always crawls back to, probably because he’s so similar to my exs own mother.
Everything just feels so exciting. I get to find a new place to live and decorate and unpack and organize only how I want to - nothing has to go on top shelves where I can’t reach. I can read without someone saying I’m “intentionally trying to seem busy so we can’t talk” I can watch tv shows and movies without someone walking in and getting butthurt cause they wanna watch it, too, now that I’m 4 seasons in or whatever. I can wear whatever I feel like and no one’s going to be gross about it in my own home. I don’t have to worry when he’s out with friends that they’re talking shit about me and instigating a fight without me even knowing - this spineless and easily swayed, angry man is gone from my life and I am FREE
2024.05.14 03:14 chonically_sad dentist suggestions in chicago area?
i just moved to chicago and i have really bad teeth. my last dentist tried to fill a cavity on the facial side of my mouth, and it didn't matter how much novicaine he used i still felt it. he referred me to a sedation dentist because they didn't have the ability to in office, and the sedation dentist was THE WORST. i tried explaining my situation (i have areas of decalcification on the facial side of almost all of my teeth and that's where my hypersensitivity stems from) and he treated me like i was a toddler bc i admitted i hadn't been brushing my teeth. he also tried to tell me that the decalcified areas were just "stains" and they aren't sensitive. he also whacked a couple of my teeth from the bite side and asked me if they hurt (like, yes it hurt you whacked my tooth).
my main concern is getting shut down immediately because i don't brush often. it hurts to eat if i brush my teeth, having a layer of plaque over the sensitive areas actually makes it bearable for me to eat and drink anything. i've not had any luck explaining that to anyone, they don't believe me because the plaque is obviously exacerbating the problem. but i don't know what else to do since nobody's been able to come to a solution for my decalcified teeth. it doesn't matter what touches my teeth, they pretty much always hurt. hot, cold, sweets, most foods, water, and even air hurts touching my teeth.
i don't have any issues with sedation, since i know that can be a problem with EDS. that's why i wasn't opposed to the sedation dentist, get it done while i'm not conscious so i don't panic while people have instruments in my mouth. up until my last attempt at a filling i've never had issues with novicaine. actually, if anything it used to work too well and i'd be numb way longer than the average person.
all i want is to see someone who will listen to me, and not shame me for "not taking care of my teeth". understanding EDS is a bonus, but i know that's hard to find in dentistry.
suggestions on how to manage my tooth pain in the meantime are also welcome. i've tried nearly everything i can think of and nothing works, fluoride treatment, oragel, boka toothpaste, brushing with only water, water flossers, regular floss, prescription mouthwash.
submitted by chonically_sad to ehlersdanlos [link] [comments]
my main concern is getting shut down immediately because i don't brush often. it hurts to eat if i brush my teeth, having a layer of plaque over the sensitive areas actually makes it bearable for me to eat and drink anything. i've not had any luck explaining that to anyone, they don't believe me because the plaque is obviously exacerbating the problem. but i don't know what else to do since nobody's been able to come to a solution for my decalcified teeth. it doesn't matter what touches my teeth, they pretty much always hurt. hot, cold, sweets, most foods, water, and even air hurts touching my teeth.
i don't have any issues with sedation, since i know that can be a problem with EDS. that's why i wasn't opposed to the sedation dentist, get it done while i'm not conscious so i don't panic while people have instruments in my mouth. up until my last attempt at a filling i've never had issues with novicaine. actually, if anything it used to work too well and i'd be numb way longer than the average person.
all i want is to see someone who will listen to me, and not shame me for "not taking care of my teeth". understanding EDS is a bonus, but i know that's hard to find in dentistry.
suggestions on how to manage my tooth pain in the meantime are also welcome. i've tried nearly everything i can think of and nothing works, fluoride treatment, oragel, boka toothpaste, brushing with only water, water flossers, regular floss, prescription mouthwash.
2024.05.14 03:13 mojikou I am not allowed to see him because of my parents. And im not sure how long he is willing to put up with it.
So in an earlier post I (F18) put in vent, I have a big crush on a guy, and I only called him my bf (M20) for simplicity and the sake of the post and it's pretty much mutual. But as a brief summary:
I made things worse by fabricating that I was going out with friends 2 days ago. I was actually trying to go out with my crush. Dad fucking drives me there. BIG mistake, demands to see my friends, ofc I cant show him. I get an earful of how crush is a predator, he just saved my life, essentially never do that again. I get my phone taken for lying and I basically have to cut contact with him.
My dad swears (along with my mom since she just co-signs every thing he does) that all I have to do is just tell him who he is and introduce him. And call me crazy for NOT doing that, but I've been living with these helicopter parents my whole life and I can make a pretty good assumption of how I would be treated after introducing him.
The times I would be honest about who I'm with, it would be brought up randomly in a conversation and how my boyfriend of the time is distracting me and then they would "eliminate" the problem by taking my phone or laptop typically.
I've had a clean slate my whole life because every bad deed I've committed, they have been there every step of the way. Some people dream at night for parents like those and I know that. So I am in constant torment of appreciating the lavish life I have, in exchange for the most committed parents one has ever seen.
So dad comes in today and I'm just sick of this conversation. First of all he condesendingly says "Your life sucks right now huh?" and I tell him no because I secretly have other plans (-and even if I didn't I'm far too old to be bitching about a roadblock I would find an alternative to), but he asks me who he is, where he lives, when he's gonna meet him. I tell him straight up I'm not disclosing any of that stuff. Bold move for someone who lives under his roof but I already accepted that I'm willing to get my things taken and yelled at if that means protecting my peace and my crushes because A) he didn't deserve getting stood up, intentional or not, 2 days ago, and B) I wasn't going to drag him into my family mess no matter what. He starts yelling ofc and is probably going to take more jurrasic measures knowing him and my mom.
Believe it or not while my caretakers are a big concern, my bigger one is how long my crush is willing to put up with it since we are starting to be, and basically something much more. I undeniably adore him and we really have a bond like no other. I tell him my parents just wont be apart of the picture for now. But with his looks and personality I'm sure a girl with a much better situation than me could easily take him away.
TL;DR: Parents find out about crush and now im worried my boyfriend don't wanna be a part of that
submitted by mojikou to Crushes [link] [comments]
I made things worse by fabricating that I was going out with friends 2 days ago. I was actually trying to go out with my crush. Dad fucking drives me there. BIG mistake, demands to see my friends, ofc I cant show him. I get an earful of how crush is a predator, he just saved my life, essentially never do that again. I get my phone taken for lying and I basically have to cut contact with him.
My dad swears (along with my mom since she just co-signs every thing he does) that all I have to do is just tell him who he is and introduce him. And call me crazy for NOT doing that, but I've been living with these helicopter parents my whole life and I can make a pretty good assumption of how I would be treated after introducing him.
The times I would be honest about who I'm with, it would be brought up randomly in a conversation and how my boyfriend of the time is distracting me and then they would "eliminate" the problem by taking my phone or laptop typically.
I've had a clean slate my whole life because every bad deed I've committed, they have been there every step of the way. Some people dream at night for parents like those and I know that. So I am in constant torment of appreciating the lavish life I have, in exchange for the most committed parents one has ever seen.
So dad comes in today and I'm just sick of this conversation. First of all he condesendingly says "Your life sucks right now huh?" and I tell him no because I secretly have other plans (-and even if I didn't I'm far too old to be bitching about a roadblock I would find an alternative to), but he asks me who he is, where he lives, when he's gonna meet him. I tell him straight up I'm not disclosing any of that stuff. Bold move for someone who lives under his roof but I already accepted that I'm willing to get my things taken and yelled at if that means protecting my peace and my crushes because A) he didn't deserve getting stood up, intentional or not, 2 days ago, and B) I wasn't going to drag him into my family mess no matter what. He starts yelling ofc and is probably going to take more jurrasic measures knowing him and my mom.
Believe it or not while my caretakers are a big concern, my bigger one is how long my crush is willing to put up with it since we are starting to be, and basically something much more. I undeniably adore him and we really have a bond like no other. I tell him my parents just wont be apart of the picture for now. But with his looks and personality I'm sure a girl with a much better situation than me could easily take him away.
TL;DR: Parents find out about crush and now im worried my boyfriend don't wanna be a part of that
2024.05.14 03:13 phdthrowaway1718 Worried I may not have sent all high school transcripts to undergrad. What may happen if this is found out currently (graduated in 2017)?
Hey everyone,
Well, I have a very odd concern (even though I'm a Ph.D student at the moment). I've recently been going through a lot of my records for an upcoming internship and I'm worried I may have only sent the transcript from the last high school I graduated from in this case, rather than all of them.
For some context, I initially "attended" (this will be in quotes for a reason) the public high school in the area. I was only there for 3 days that consisted of no classes at all. Rather, it was an orientation of sorts so the would-be freshmen could get used to the high school, rules, and its layout. I never completed any classes before my parents found a high school in a pinch.
The following high school I only attended for a quarter of the year (before I moved onto the final high school I would graduate from 3.75 years down the road). I got my old high transcript recently just in case it was necessary for future employment and I see my grades under the first quarter were listed as "NA" in this case. My guess is they probably treated it like how colleges transfer grades (where previous institution grades don't count towards GPA). No big deal on its own.
The only thing I'm concerned about is whether I submitted the old transcript from the high school where I attended for a quarter to my undergraduate colleges at all. Folks can probably tell by this post that I'm an extremely anxious person so I let my parents handle applications and paperwork (since both of those give me the most anxiety). This non ironically makes more anxious as an adult since I never knew what I took out in loans in undergrad until I applied to graduate school and had to consider my debt totals and whatnot (feel free to see one of my older posts where I list all of my neurodivergent, mental, and recent sleep apnea diagnosis).
I am also worried about what could happen if those grades from the high school I attended were uncharacteristically low at all. Long story short, that high school I attended for a quarter had what my father aptly described as "monitored home school" and I abused the retake system they had in place by not doing well on my first attempt, memorizing the answers they reused, and retaking it again. I wonder sometimes if they picked up on that and my grades were knocked down at all.
What could happen if this mistake is the case at all? What could happen to my degrees up until this point since I'm now in a Ph.D program?
submitted by phdthrowaway1718 to college [link] [comments]
Well, I have a very odd concern (even though I'm a Ph.D student at the moment). I've recently been going through a lot of my records for an upcoming internship and I'm worried I may have only sent the transcript from the last high school I graduated from in this case, rather than all of them.
For some context, I initially "attended" (this will be in quotes for a reason) the public high school in the area. I was only there for 3 days that consisted of no classes at all. Rather, it was an orientation of sorts so the would-be freshmen could get used to the high school, rules, and its layout. I never completed any classes before my parents found a high school in a pinch.
The following high school I only attended for a quarter of the year (before I moved onto the final high school I would graduate from 3.75 years down the road). I got my old high transcript recently just in case it was necessary for future employment and I see my grades under the first quarter were listed as "NA" in this case. My guess is they probably treated it like how colleges transfer grades (where previous institution grades don't count towards GPA). No big deal on its own.
The only thing I'm concerned about is whether I submitted the old transcript from the high school where I attended for a quarter to my undergraduate colleges at all. Folks can probably tell by this post that I'm an extremely anxious person so I let my parents handle applications and paperwork (since both of those give me the most anxiety). This non ironically makes more anxious as an adult since I never knew what I took out in loans in undergrad until I applied to graduate school and had to consider my debt totals and whatnot (feel free to see one of my older posts where I list all of my neurodivergent, mental, and recent sleep apnea diagnosis).
I am also worried about what could happen if those grades from the high school I attended were uncharacteristically low at all. Long story short, that high school I attended for a quarter had what my father aptly described as "monitored home school" and I abused the retake system they had in place by not doing well on my first attempt, memorizing the answers they reused, and retaking it again. I wonder sometimes if they picked up on that and my grades were knocked down at all.
What could happen if this mistake is the case at all? What could happen to my degrees up until this point since I'm now in a Ph.D program?
2024.05.14 03:12 Maleficent_Tell2970 Christopher Alvarez Livestream - Serious Replies Only
Hey everyone, we should leave this guy alone if he's telling the truth. But something isn't sitting right. I was asking a lot of questions in that chat, but got no real answers.
My issue with the livestream/article:
submitted by Maleficent_Tell2970 to DarkKenny [link] [comments]
My issue with the livestream/article:
- Christopher has a certain harsh bravado, making jokes around it being "NYC BABY, I was partying at 3am." Like this is so strange. He said he was alone that night or had left his friends to be "independent." No offense, I'm sure the guy has had a tough life and has done well for himself, but how are you realistically getting around NYC at 3am? And why is someone in that condition doing so?
- Listening to beats with Drizzy in a hotel room? This seems incredibly strange to do at 3am after one of Drake's shows. More likely drinking / doing drugs at an OVO afterparty, right?
- The minors and footnote from his article from a PR team - Seems like a coverup
- He laughs a lot at very serious questions/topics - Odd demeanor
- There was a question about if he saw Drake with minors that night? He answers something along the lines of, "That night? No..." Then sort of backpedaled, moved on quickly to other questions.
- Being invited to listen to beats with Drake is surely noteworthy to a stargazer like himself who posts his celeb encounters on IG... whether it was premediatated (invitation by Drake) or by happenstance after showing up at the hotel. But nothing from that night. Even his picture on his article is from 2017 (I think). And it's photoshopped, which is even stranger.
2024.05.14 03:12 Intelligent_City2644 Sulking like a Child
I went into my interview for my dream job on Friday. The owner seemed to really like me and offered to have me come in to watch a training class be conducted.
I was explained the starting pay for all candidates was $17 an hour and was part time as described. I asked lots of questions and by the end of the two hours of interacting with everyone, I got the vibe from the owner that I had made a great impression.
"What do you think? Would you like to work here? Well, we think you'd be a great team member. I'd like to set a date and time for you sit down with our scheduler."
"Oh! Thankyou very much."
I was so happy and flattered. I talked about how excited I was and how I couldn't wait to start training. I told him I loved it here. He joked how I could help another employee with the social media. I ended up buying a few products and he was even nice enough to give me an employee discount.
I called my boyfriend, my family and texted a close friend about how excited I was.
"They told me they'd love to have me on the team and that I get to sit down with the scheduler in couple days, isn't that great?! This is a dream come true!" I gushed with pride.
When I came in a couple days later as promised I greeted everyone and the scheduler and I went into a back room. She was sweet and she told me she was very excited because this was her first interview she has ever conducted. She told me she loved my resume.
I blinked, inside feeling a bit startled but began to conduct myself in a interview type fashion. I tried to come off as friendly and as courteous as I could. I was happy we had a lot in common and I appreciate that I was able to make her laugh and talk about herself. She told me she doesn't get final say but that she sincerely hopes I get the job.
I waved my goodbyes and seemed cheerful and hopeful but left out the door with a soured face.
The owner immediately called me and in a jumble of words explained that the scheduler is also training to be a future manager. He hurridy told me hed like to have me come in for my final interview Wednesday, where he would ask me some situational questions.
He then went on to say that he was leaving the country for vacation for 3 weeks and that hopefully there would be an offer made by June.
I told him a bunch of affirmatives because I am a terrible people pleaser. At this point I was nervous and unsure of myself and I didn't want to come off as rude or ungrateful. I just asked a bit awkwardly, if he doesn't feel I'm a good fit or if they find someone else then I'd love a phone call. "Oh as a courtesy you mean? Yes of course, sure."
I got off the phone feeling confused. I had stupidly told everyone I already got the job. I berated myself for being so neieve and inspected my memories obsessively for anywhere I truly misunderstood. I concluded that I was sure he was being direct with me but must have changed his mind.
The thing is, I don't know I can't wait 3 weeks to see if they will extend me an offer. I needed that job and had thought I was coming in to sign paperwork and figure out my new work schedule.
Ever since my boyfriend got hurt at work I really needed this for us financially and I really just needed a win after so many weeks of sorrow and worry.
Maybe I'll get my dream job but my soul is telling me that it's best not get my hopes up at all. Right now, I am just trying to comfort myself. I'm nieve and maybe I should have known better. It's another important life lesson on only listening to what people do and to not pay attention to what they say. I should also know not to celebrate until I get things in writing.
It takes a mature person to really get that through their head. I'm working on it.
Despite this Wisdom, I'm sulking like a child.
-Thanks for listening. Let me know if something like this has ever happened to you before. I feel pretty dumb right now for sure... If you have any thoughts or encouragement that would be very kind of you.
submitted by Intelligent_City2644 to jobs [link] [comments]
I was explained the starting pay for all candidates was $17 an hour and was part time as described. I asked lots of questions and by the end of the two hours of interacting with everyone, I got the vibe from the owner that I had made a great impression.
"What do you think? Would you like to work here? Well, we think you'd be a great team member. I'd like to set a date and time for you sit down with our scheduler."
"Oh! Thankyou very much."
I was so happy and flattered. I talked about how excited I was and how I couldn't wait to start training. I told him I loved it here. He joked how I could help another employee with the social media. I ended up buying a few products and he was even nice enough to give me an employee discount.
I called my boyfriend, my family and texted a close friend about how excited I was.
"They told me they'd love to have me on the team and that I get to sit down with the scheduler in couple days, isn't that great?! This is a dream come true!" I gushed with pride.
When I came in a couple days later as promised I greeted everyone and the scheduler and I went into a back room. She was sweet and she told me she was very excited because this was her first interview she has ever conducted. She told me she loved my resume.
I blinked, inside feeling a bit startled but began to conduct myself in a interview type fashion. I tried to come off as friendly and as courteous as I could. I was happy we had a lot in common and I appreciate that I was able to make her laugh and talk about herself. She told me she doesn't get final say but that she sincerely hopes I get the job.
I waved my goodbyes and seemed cheerful and hopeful but left out the door with a soured face.
The owner immediately called me and in a jumble of words explained that the scheduler is also training to be a future manager. He hurridy told me hed like to have me come in for my final interview Wednesday, where he would ask me some situational questions.
He then went on to say that he was leaving the country for vacation for 3 weeks and that hopefully there would be an offer made by June.
I told him a bunch of affirmatives because I am a terrible people pleaser. At this point I was nervous and unsure of myself and I didn't want to come off as rude or ungrateful. I just asked a bit awkwardly, if he doesn't feel I'm a good fit or if they find someone else then I'd love a phone call. "Oh as a courtesy you mean? Yes of course, sure."
I got off the phone feeling confused. I had stupidly told everyone I already got the job. I berated myself for being so neieve and inspected my memories obsessively for anywhere I truly misunderstood. I concluded that I was sure he was being direct with me but must have changed his mind.
The thing is, I don't know I can't wait 3 weeks to see if they will extend me an offer. I needed that job and had thought I was coming in to sign paperwork and figure out my new work schedule.
Ever since my boyfriend got hurt at work I really needed this for us financially and I really just needed a win after so many weeks of sorrow and worry.
Maybe I'll get my dream job but my soul is telling me that it's best not get my hopes up at all. Right now, I am just trying to comfort myself. I'm nieve and maybe I should have known better. It's another important life lesson on only listening to what people do and to not pay attention to what they say. I should also know not to celebrate until I get things in writing.
It takes a mature person to really get that through their head. I'm working on it.
Despite this Wisdom, I'm sulking like a child.
-Thanks for listening. Let me know if something like this has ever happened to you before. I feel pretty dumb right now for sure... If you have any thoughts or encouragement that would be very kind of you.
2024.05.14 03:12 buttercup_sugarcup I made a mistake HELP
Hi guys,
I posted the day before yesterday about how my husband and I are finally moving out after 5 years. I also mentioned that my in-laws are super bitter about it and have been making comments. My MIL and two sils are in a group chat with me and this group has on numerous occasions been used to attack me about something. Or because my sils don’t get along with their bro and don’t talk to each other they use this group to convey messages to him through me. It’s stressful. Being in the group has caused me immense anxiety and stress in the past.
This morning my fertility doctor called me and told me that my cortisol levels are high and that my body hasn’t been responding to the meds. I freaked out and decided to distant myself from everything the has caused me stress including leaving this group chat. BIG MISTAKE.
They all jumped to the conclusion that now that we’re moving that im trying to cut all ties. They accused me of showing my true colours. I didn’t have a choice but to tell them im undergoing fertility treatment and it’s important that i avoid stress. I even told them that it’s not about them but that i need to learn to cope with stress. I even shared that im starting therapy to help with stress management. I had no choice but to disclose this really personal information about my health. Otherwise they would have labeled me as god knows what.
Did I really do the wrong thing by leaving the group? They also failed to accept that they have used the group as a weapon against me.
submitted by buttercup_sugarcup to MuslimMarriage [link] [comments]
I posted the day before yesterday about how my husband and I are finally moving out after 5 years. I also mentioned that my in-laws are super bitter about it and have been making comments. My MIL and two sils are in a group chat with me and this group has on numerous occasions been used to attack me about something. Or because my sils don’t get along with their bro and don’t talk to each other they use this group to convey messages to him through me. It’s stressful. Being in the group has caused me immense anxiety and stress in the past.
This morning my fertility doctor called me and told me that my cortisol levels are high and that my body hasn’t been responding to the meds. I freaked out and decided to distant myself from everything the has caused me stress including leaving this group chat. BIG MISTAKE.
They all jumped to the conclusion that now that we’re moving that im trying to cut all ties. They accused me of showing my true colours. I didn’t have a choice but to tell them im undergoing fertility treatment and it’s important that i avoid stress. I even told them that it’s not about them but that i need to learn to cope with stress. I even shared that im starting therapy to help with stress management. I had no choice but to disclose this really personal information about my health. Otherwise they would have labeled me as god knows what.
Did I really do the wrong thing by leaving the group? They also failed to accept that they have used the group as a weapon against me.
2024.05.14 03:11 OttoVonBlastoid Nature Of A Homeless Musician: Special Thanks/Announcements
 | Hello all! Otto here. And, as you all now know. NoaHM has finally come to an end. It's been a hell of a ride that I'll never forget. But before I move on to thanking specific people and telling you all what's in store, I wanted to be a bit mushy for a minute if you'll indulge me... submitted by OttoVonBlastoid to NatureofPredators [link] [comments] When I first heard of NoP, I was in the middle of the night shift that I'm still working to this day. I had a single ear bud in, which was TECHNICALLY against the rules, and still is but fuck 'em. And to pass the time, I listened to stories. Either Mr. Creeps' Creepypasta compilations or, in this case, Agro Squirrel's Tales From Outer SPACE series. And eventually, I heard the name, The Nature Of Predators...and it all went downhill from there as you all can well imagine. Jokes aside, I fell in love with the story and universe and decided to check out the community. And soon, I found the very first fic I ever read on here, "My Floridian Arxur Daughter". From that point on, I was hooked. I read "Arxur Nursery", "The New Terran Refugee", "Feathers Of Deceit", "Lost In Found", "Recipe For Disaster", "Playing By Ear", and so, SO many more. The sheer amount of creativity on display was amazing. And so...I decided to try my hand at it. I'd already written a short creepypasta, as well as a small five-part miniseries based off of one of my friends DnD campaigns, so I had a LITTLE experience, but I still hadn't taken a single writing course or knew...anything about what I was doing, so I decided to try something small. (That worked out well...) I was in the middle of rereading "Floridian Arxur Daughter" for...maybe the sixth time when a particular scene stuck out to me. Something about it...made something click in my head. After evacuating young Chalta from the house, her big bother Carlos and his girlfriend Salisek decide to take her out on a drive, and while their driving, Carlos mentions his ability to sing, and after both Chalta and Salisek both ask for a demonstration, he sings a beautiful rendition of "Send Me A Peach" from Over The Garden Wall. It was a touching scene, and hearing the song from Chalta's point of view clicked with me. It was by this point that I'd also discovered "Playing By Ear" by u/VeryUnluckyDice, which was essentially this "listening to music through the perspective of someone else's mind" idea made manifest. And that's where it all began. I made a post, proposing the premise of my story, and while I didn't get a LOT of feedback, most of the feedback I got was positive. And a few days later, "Nature Of A Homeless Musician: Prologue" was born, in all of its overly edgy glory. And well...you know the rest from there... I never could have imagined just how big this story would get. It was NEVER supposed to grow this much, touch so many people, inspire so many others to make stuff themselves. Sure, I hoped that it might, but I never thought it would! But now...here we are... I...can't put into words, how thankful I am to each and every single one of you, who gave my little idea a chance. It means more to me then I could ever describe. Ever since I was a kid, I knew I wanted to make my living by making things! At first, I thought that just meant being a Youtuber, like every cringy middle schooler does, but now...I think I get it... I've always wanted to be able to make things, and for those things to make OTHER people happy. Make them laugh, make them cry, make them smile, and make their days just a little bit brighter. I've...long since given up that old dream... I just didn't think it was possible, not for me anyways. But you all proved me wrong. Every comment, every meme, every bit of art you guys make...proves me wrong. When I got my first bit of fanart, I cried at my monitor. Because for the first time in so long that I can't even remember, I was happy. I was so, so happy, because it genuinely felt like this dream that I've had since I was a kid was finally possible. Someone discovered something I made, and enjoyed it enough, loved it enough, got invested enough, to make something themselves just to show me and everyone else just how much they loved it.... And it made me happy, so, so damn happy. So thank you. Thank you all so much for everything you do. Thank you for reading, commenting, replying, suggesting, joking, laughing, creating, and expressing with me. It means more than you'll ever know. And even if I don't end up pursuing writing after this, my life will never be the same, thanks to all of you. If you're reading this, right here, right now, YOU, yes YOU... Thank you...for everything you do. And even if you don't think so, I think you're one of the most amazing people in this ass-backwards galaxy of ours. Thank you. Now then, on to specific thanks: u/Bow-tied_Engineer: You were literally the first person to tell me that this fic was a good idea. If you hadn't been there in the comments, I might not have gone through with it. And even since then, you've still been an absolute chad. We might not have the same taste in romance sub-plots, but I'll always respect you and your takes. Thank you, for giving me the confidence to give this a try. u/CaptainChristopher02: The man himself. Your fic, "My Floridian Arxur Daughter" as well as "My Brazilian Arxur Nursery" were, as stated before, the very first fic I read on the sub. And your work was the first tiny spark that slowly became NoaHM. I've said it multiple times, and I'll say it again, if there was no "Arxur Daughter", there would be no "Homeless Musician". When I first started writing, I didn't even think I'd ever even meet you, but the fact that I have, and that you've joined my own little community of music and Tohba memes means the world to me. u/VeryUnluckyDice: Reading through "Playing By Ear" for the first time was an experience I'll never forget. It was so interesting and different to almost everything else on the sub at the time except "Venlil Metal". You've done so much to inspire me and my work and even now, you're still an absolute chad and someone this community just wouldn't be the same without. I'm really looking forward to the day when our two stories really do cross. It'll be a grand sonata of sound the likes of which this sub has never seen, I just know it! u/JulianSkies: Ever since you first started commenting on my chapters, you have been an absolutely ENDLESS source of positivity, helpful advice, information on the setting, proofreading, and all around good vibes. I always look forward to seeing what you have to say on the most recent post, and I hope you decide to stick around for whatever comes next. Thank you. u/xskipy10: Good lord, where to even begin with you? Before, when I mentioned that first bit of fanart that made me cry, that was YOUR artwork. And that one picture, of Michael and the rest of the main cast has had such an enormous impact on not just me, but the rest of the sub as a whole. It was that one picture that gave me hope that the dream I've had since I was a kid was possible. It was your artwork of Tohba that, TO THIS DAY, Dovah is still using to award people who beat him to the precious title of "SPEED". I mean it when I say you are an absolute treasure, not just to me and my story, but to the entire NoP community. u/OmegaOmnimon02: Before there was GuyWhoExists, there was Omega, the fastest memer in The West. You were the architect of the origianl "Rejoice! Tohba Be Upon Ye" meme, and it has since been used to this day as a form of mutual celebration for all. You've been one of my avid supporters for a long time now, and seeing another of your shitposts in the Discord never fails to brighten my day. Thank you for all that you do. u/DOVAHCREED12: I swear, if you aren't SPEED when this post drops, I'm gonna be so disappointed. Jokes aside, I have loved and appreciated every single Venbig hug I have ever received from you. Back when I first started writing this, the "Official Venbig Seal Of Approval" was this vaunted, holy, symbol that a lowly peasant such as myself would never be able to earn. And then one appeared in my comments and it felt like freaking Christmas. Thank you so much for giving my story a chance. u/Ben_Elohim_2020: I'll never get over just how hilarious our first meeting was. What was meant to be a quick one-to-two chapter long side trip with some shady dude in an alley completely spiraled into a giant, five-part, spat with the actual Space Mafia known as The Family. While the Twilight Valley Arc was divisive for a lot of people reading, I hope you know I had a MASSIVE amount of fun writing it with you, and I can't wait to see where you're future projects lead. Papyroo: (Sorry, I can't remember your new Reddit name) Along with Omega, I've always looked forward to seeing what you have to say when it comes to my fic. And the impact you've had on my story can't be overstated. The Ficnapping you did is the reason that Tohba now has his blue "Tiwfish" plushie. And the events of your addition to my canon will continue to be referenced and fondly looked back on by my characters for a long time to come. u/Spacer_Catgirl4969: I remember a time when you were still SpacerNEKO. You were always one of my most avid commenters way back when, and I always appreciated your kind words. And I still can't express how cool it was that you actually made a pixel art music video for Dohkar. It still holds up, even now. You and Guywhoexists should TOTALLY work on a project together. With your combined pixel art skills, who knows what's possible?! u/Mini-Tonk: Well, if it isn't the Rat boi, himself. You have never once faltered in your efforts to not only support my work, but also protect Tohba from the shadows. Your efforts have not gone unnoticed, and you canonically making ME a character in your fic is still hilarious and heartwarming. Thank you for everything you do. u/Guywhoexists2812: While you are one of the newest members of our little NoaHM family, that hasn't stopped you from being one of the most active and creative folks we have to offer. The sheer amount of memes and pixel art you've created is downright INSPIRATIONAL. Along with Skipy, whenever someone comes up with a cute idea for art, I know you'll find some way to pull through. Keep creating, King. You are no mere "Guy". You are a KING who exists! And of course, u/SpacePaladin15 for creating this awesome universe to begin with, without whom, none of use would be here right now. There are two other names missing on this list, but that's mostly because I'm currently working on a project with them and I don't want to spoil anything...yet. And speaking of future projects! ANNOUNCEMENT TIME!!!! It's been one hell of a wild ride, hasn't it? But I tell you this: THE RIDE AIN'T OVER YET!!!!! But...it will be slowing down for a while... After working on this story for so long, (especially that triple upload. GOD, what was I thinking?!) I am in dire need of rest. So, for now, I will be going on about a month-long hiatus from posting, except for a small occasion here and there. I'll still be active in the community, especially on Discord, but you won't get any big story updates for a while. Does this mean that I'm done and the story's over? No. This was but the first arc in the tale of Michael Ruiz Andrews and his family. There will INDEED be MOAR!!! More music! More hijinks! More action! More romance! More drama! More touching family moments! And, of COURSE, MORE TOHBA!!!! There will be MOAR!!! Just not yet. My Hiatus will officially start tomorrow after a belated NoaHM Mother's Day Special. I also have a Father's Day Special planned for next month as well. But other than the occasional announcement post, you won't be getting anything story-related out of me until my break is over and I'm ready to unveil the next project I and three other creators have been working on. I won't say anything more on the project, but I will say to keep an eye out... "But Otto!", I hear you ask. "If there won't be any more big story updates, how will I get my fix of Baby-roo induced dopamine?! My brain requires more Tohba and Ven-floof memes to give me the goody good chemicals!!!" Well my friend, I have just the solution for you!!! A SHAMELESS SELF-PLUG!!! Most of you may already know, but Nature Of A Homeless Musician has its OWN DISCORD SERVER!!!!!! We've got MEMES, STORY IDEAS, FOOD SO FULL OF LOVE THAT MAMA-ROO HERSELF COULD'VE MADE IT! We got fanart, gaming chats, and we even plan the occasional movie night! As well, as soon as this post goes live, I'll be adding a new channel specifically for Q&A and Trivia! For Example: Did you know that NoaHM was originally meant to only be ten chapters long? Did you know Trilly and Dailo were created entirely on accident? Did you know that the events of the FINALE have been remade, reorganized, and rewritten at LEAST four times? Did you know...THAT TOHBA WAS BASED OFF A REAL PERSON?! All of these things are true! And if you want to learn more about the making of this series, direct from my brain, the come on in and ask away! All I ask in return is that you follow the rules I've laid out a generally not be a jerk. We're here to have fun and be wholesome, so let's keep it that way. I hope to see you there! https://discord.gg/YSysvHHx And now, lastly, here's nearly EVERY single meme bit of fanart I've received: And once again, from the bottom of my heart, with all the love I can muster, thank you. https://preview.redd.it/2nxhg18mia0d1.jpg?width=2388&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5887802bce7c20b6fe2f190ce0992be17a3f6a58 https://preview.redd.it/u9i0zbgtia0d1.jpg?width=2048&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d0ff76b390ec3f7daed9d66a4d556db0a063fc97 https://preview.redd.it/pg860rcvia0d1.jpg?width=1024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2d6fa595bb160514ce214c1594e70ffdf9c8c4e3 https://preview.redd.it/u94h5np0ja0d1.jpg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=373918e5c84b606979efd9f793418068e6cbc468 https://preview.redd.it/609h59x3ja0d1.jpg?width=1334&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9b09601d8f19c0b7aaf262bdd887b24317e95a6d https://preview.redd.it/01pbmbs6ja0d1.jpg?width=524&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c5cdbf19cfa75be452cdfb4c54e19924d0b5b1aa https://preview.redd.it/6iz7wh8bja0d1.jpg?width=512&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2257a778a87bb3013b08bac4ce9021d1de8e56d1 https://preview.redd.it/zxry3gddja0d1.jpg?width=500&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2f0a0b18130d8e3283970f3e8f97002362c957e0 https://preview.redd.it/qfx79v5gja0d1.jpg?width=1164&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0d5db5c8624a18513160ebb6f9648f2486a238cb https://preview.redd.it/metjjzphja0d1.jpg?width=888&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6adabe3c438808bbeb623f5690e9f34766d7e04f https://preview.redd.it/8yrync9lja0d1.png?width=1024&format=png&auto=webp&s=d75e3c651c99936f2eccd6135ba769aeab119208 https://preview.redd.it/0uawe15aka0d1.jpg?width=500&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5999790ce154f9022ca51812b857aeefd348b66f https://preview.redd.it/uug3dq1bka0d1.jpg?width=1668&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ca76e5a6939143aad5dc148607934b896eeb9305 https://preview.redd.it/lr2gzj6cka0d1.jpg?width=1521&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d4b2ec5e86862c8268aa0efdfde022b1a3ce37c1 https://preview.redd.it/sk0rz05eka0d1.jpg?width=500&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0eedf45cb5627708f6c5449a4d4ce96f5820cca7 https://preview.redd.it/hwztvo5vka0d1.jpg?width=577&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d2492936771668389e1e33eb37adfdde5ff898e9 https://preview.redd.it/ns5mvayvka0d1.jpg?width=960&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=78658096eda7cd47a2faf0add5806d78a2b9ea20 https://preview.redd.it/cn5ruxxwka0d1.jpg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e36414e11ee37f23418a5d7b9d3fce6f13b7d57c https://preview.redd.it/3w08uzb2la0d1.png?width=2048&format=png&auto=webp&s=84608636603a71dba3863d02cf3e0d655062fbe7 Thank you... Thank you all... |
2024.05.14 03:09 HoldMyDickens Are my parents right?
(My brother 18m graduated over the weekend. He also turned 18 1.5 weeks ago.) So, I 16m have autism. It was diagnosed 5 months ago, but we suspected it for a couple years. I have a hard time being social, and sometimes I have a breakdown if I am overwhelmed by it. I've learned to mask it over the years, but sometimes it's impossible to control. My brother turned 18 on May 2nd, and I wanted to get him a gift. So I sold all my expensive Pokemon cards(worth over a hundred dollars) at vintage stock for ten dollars. I've had them for my entire life, and cherish them to my core. They held a lot of memories of my past, and it was hard to give them up. But I pushed through it, wanting to make his 18th birthday special. Fast forward a week, and he's graduating. It's his graduation weekend, and I'm determined to make it special as well. I've been practicing his graduation music in band, even though I don't play anymore because of my social anxiety. Playing a trumpet kinda feels like yelling in a room where everyone else is only talking. On Saturday, we hold his graduation party. I'm woke up by my mom, and I spend the entire morning cleaning the house while being yelled at by my panicking mom. I then spend 3 hours decorating for him, all while he wanders around dwadlleing. People start showing up, and I retreat to my parents room where I proceed to babysit my dogs. The few times I did leave, they didn't stop barking until I came back. After a couple hours of sitting there, I get bored. I asked my brother if he is going to be on his vr headset. He tells me no, but says I can't play on it anyways, as he wants me to socialize. I tell him I'm going to play on my Xbox, only to be told not to. I'm kind of surprised, as it's my Xbox. There's no reason why I shouldn't be able to play. He then says I can either sit with the dogs or socialize. I'm taken a back, as he doesn't usually have the right to order me around. I shrug it off, and go back to sit with the dogs. I don't want to ruin his graduation party. I sit there for the rest of the party, only coming out to say goodbye to everyone. The next day, I'm woken up by mom again. This time though, I can tell is going to be a bad social day. But I play along, getting dressed so I can play for the graduation ceremony. Once I get to school, I try to avoid all contact with people. I mostly make it to the gymnasium, where the ceremony is being held, without losing my shit. That's when I see the seating arrangements. The entire band is shoved in a corner. Luckily though, some people didn't show up. This left a big gap, letting me sit two seats away from the people on my right, and four seats away from the people on my left. Then the principal decides he doesn't like how we look, and squishes us further into the corner and putting everyone shoulder to shoulder. I'm borderline breaking down now, but I get through the agonizing hour without breaking down completely. Eventually, we're let out. I walk over to my parents car, where my brother is standing with them. I ask if I can go home with him, because they're going shopping. Remember, I mask very well. They tell me that I'm coming shopping with them, and that my brother wants the house to himself. I tell them that I can't take going shopping right now, and I need to go home. They ignore my pleas, insisting that I'll come with them. Then they try a different tactic, saying the choice is up to my brother. He recognizes it's not fair for me, and says I can go home with him. They then try to pull every card in the book. "You used to be mean to him when you guys were home alone!" I haven't done that in over a month. The only reason I did it was because I was frustrated that my brother just got to order me around. I told them that I haven't done that in a month, but they go onto the next excuse. "It's his graduation day, it should be special" at this point, my mask is falling apart. I start raising my voice trying to convince them that I can't go with them. They then try bribing me with the offer to go to Petco so I could look at the animals, but my breakdown couldn't be fixed with that. Eventually I get in the truck, throwing my trumpet in and slamming the door behind me. Then dad, who is stubborn and petty, turns on the music at a very high volume. When we had first set out, mom told him to turn it off because it was too loud. Now she sat in silence, content with making my ride hell. I then curl up in the backseat, with my fingers in my ears. Eventually, they get out to go shopping. I stay in the car without argument, because we all know it would get worse if I was forced to go with them.When they come back, dad turns the radio on full blast again, and I go into a full meltdown. I start screaming at them to shut it off, and mom decides it's time to shut it off now. But dad, wanting to instigate me, decides to turn it back on at a slightly lower volume. Even mom recognizes this as instigating but before she can do anything about it, I open the car door. Keep In mind, we're still moving at about 30mph. I'm fully prepared to launch myself out of the car, and the only reason I don't is because I have to unbuckle my seatbelt. In that timeframe of me unbuckling myself, mom yells at me to shut the door. That snaps me out of my tantrum enough for me to shut the door. Mom then yells at dad to take her home. I yell at him to take me to the mental hospital. Both of them refuse because of how much money it takes. Once we get home, I get on my phone and calm down. Then I get on my Xbox and start playing powerwash simulator to calm me down even more. After I'm calm enough, I start playing multiplayer games. Today, mom wanted to take away all my electronics for the way I acted, saying that I was super selfish. I eventually argued my way into getting my phone back, leading to me making this. Her reasoning behind me being selfish is that I "made my brother feel guilty". She also brought up the fact that Sunday was mother's day, and that I shouldn't have acted that way because it was her day as well. Are my parents right, or should I take this situation to medical professionals?
submitted by HoldMyDickens to autism [link] [comments]
2024.05.14 03:09 Bubba48 Therapist question , need help
Hi all, 3 month into trying to reconcile, been in therapy for 2 and a half. I'm starting to wonder about my MC. I feel that we are not going anywhere, maybe one or 2 sessions have been about what happened and what we need to do ( other than the first 2 where we went over why we were there, wife cheated on me ). Seems like the last 5 or 6 meetings have been about kids, taking getaways, doing things by ourselves together. That's all fins and dandy, but it's not helping me get to where I need to be. I got upset after the last session and my wife wants me to tell her what I need and what I need to talk about!! I said she's the therapist, she should know that!! I need to figure out why this happened, how to get through the feelings I have and how to move forward. My wife doesn't get any of that, she just thought things were getting better. I told her they were fine for her because she's not dealing with this, she caused it, she has the answers, she has all the pieces I'm missing from the puzzle I need to complete. What types of questions are your therapists asking. ( I understand if you don't want to answer) What are you talking about about, what if any activities are you doing. Should we be seeking out another therapist?? I'm just very confused and I feel like this is getting me nowhere!!
submitted by Bubba48 to survivinginfidelity [link] [comments]
2024.05.14 03:08 somedaysunderthesun Fated to pretend
You kept asking me to move on. You told me it could never be like that again. I was trying to learn to be your friend because you didn't seem to want me. You showed me more than that but by then I had already been screamed at, every week, for not letting you go. Worse than screamed at.
I trembled at each next word just hoping for the ones that told me how you loved me. I saw your hope and wanted to change my life.
If you really want to know how much I loved you, how I struggled to love you, how shattered I was losing you and then being attacked for feeling for you, for staying in touch with you, you already know who to ask.
I would never have tortured myself like this. I wouldn't have endured what I did. I wouldn't have listened to your music or read your poetry. I've read so much and more than I would admit I truly believe is you, you've shown yourself to me again and again.
You'd want me to show my feelings, be there, but when I am I'm doing something wrong. I feel it in the shame at home, I hear it in the echoes of anon redditors that aren't you, I read how it's all turned to ash and it's over.
It wasn't pretend. But if you feel like that, if I made you feel like that, then there doesn't seem to be much difference. Should I insist it wasn't my fault if it can't be believed? Can I tell you about the things that brought me to my knees?
I spoiled it all by being too blindingly obvious, essentially not anon, and writing tacky fanfiction. Then I got threats, like someone was bumping at my chest and I chose not to get in any mind of flame war with them over you, like gazelle fighting over a fawn only where they all have blindfolds on.
I followed, I read, I cried, I was attacked for crying, I was threatened for not letting go, I was made to believe there was nothing I could do. I also chose the only path I could see that didn't lead to suffering, for anyone but me.
Maybe we wouldn't have worked or got along. Maybe you wouldn't have liked what I like and maybe you would have really hated me, I don't know. I know I would have done anything for you, I would have followed your every whim and command if you had done. I would do anything but take a life. Anything but that. I can't expect you to believe it but it was the truth.
Now I don't have many feelings, extreme or otherwise. I've stared into begging eyes hoping they were enough and crushed them with my pained and longing tears. I walked up to the altar and fled at the last second. I've defied spiritual signs the size of hurricanes that told me to let you go.
But you don't know and thank god you might never know just how destroyed I was. I felt like I was in the backseat of my own life. In the trunk. I didn't pretend those tears, the dry-heaves, the crisis, the endless grieving. You didn't pretend your own tears.
It's not like this because either of us loved someone else. It's because I messed up and hurt you like a freaked out horse. It's because I was called to sacrifice my time to fistfight the reaper in little ways every day.
Thank you letters for letting spill my brain. Please don't take reddit too seriously, I'm not out to find anyone here.
submitted by somedaysunderthesun to letters [link] [comments]
I trembled at each next word just hoping for the ones that told me how you loved me. I saw your hope and wanted to change my life.
If you really want to know how much I loved you, how I struggled to love you, how shattered I was losing you and then being attacked for feeling for you, for staying in touch with you, you already know who to ask.
I would never have tortured myself like this. I wouldn't have endured what I did. I wouldn't have listened to your music or read your poetry. I've read so much and more than I would admit I truly believe is you, you've shown yourself to me again and again.
You'd want me to show my feelings, be there, but when I am I'm doing something wrong. I feel it in the shame at home, I hear it in the echoes of anon redditors that aren't you, I read how it's all turned to ash and it's over.
It wasn't pretend. But if you feel like that, if I made you feel like that, then there doesn't seem to be much difference. Should I insist it wasn't my fault if it can't be believed? Can I tell you about the things that brought me to my knees?
I spoiled it all by being too blindingly obvious, essentially not anon, and writing tacky fanfiction. Then I got threats, like someone was bumping at my chest and I chose not to get in any mind of flame war with them over you, like gazelle fighting over a fawn only where they all have blindfolds on.
I followed, I read, I cried, I was attacked for crying, I was threatened for not letting go, I was made to believe there was nothing I could do. I also chose the only path I could see that didn't lead to suffering, for anyone but me.
Maybe we wouldn't have worked or got along. Maybe you wouldn't have liked what I like and maybe you would have really hated me, I don't know. I know I would have done anything for you, I would have followed your every whim and command if you had done. I would do anything but take a life. Anything but that. I can't expect you to believe it but it was the truth.
Now I don't have many feelings, extreme or otherwise. I've stared into begging eyes hoping they were enough and crushed them with my pained and longing tears. I walked up to the altar and fled at the last second. I've defied spiritual signs the size of hurricanes that told me to let you go.
But you don't know and thank god you might never know just how destroyed I was. I felt like I was in the backseat of my own life. In the trunk. I didn't pretend those tears, the dry-heaves, the crisis, the endless grieving. You didn't pretend your own tears.
It's not like this because either of us loved someone else. It's because I messed up and hurt you like a freaked out horse. It's because I was called to sacrifice my time to fistfight the reaper in little ways every day.
Thank you letters for letting spill my brain. Please don't take reddit too seriously, I'm not out to find anyone here.
2024.05.14 03:08 Bubba48 Help with therapy
Hi all, 3 month into trying to reconcile, been in therapy for 2 and a half. I'm starting to wonder about my MC. I feel that we are not going anywhere, maybe one or 2 sessions have been about what happened and what we need to do ( other than the first 2 where we went over why we were there, wife cheated on me ). Seems like the last 5 or 6 meetings have been about kids, taking getaways, doing things by ourselves together. That's all fins and dandy, but it's not helping me get to where I need to be. I got upset after the last session and my wife wants me to tell her what I need and what I need to talk about!! I said she's the therapist, she should know that!! I need to figure out why this happened, how to get through the feelings I have and how to move forward. My wife doesn't get any of that, she just thought things were getting better. I told her they were fine for her because she's not dealing with this, she caused it, she has the answers, she has all the pieces I'm missing from the puzzle I need to complete. What types of questions are your therapists asking. ( I understand if you don't want to answer) What are you talking about about, what if any activities are you doing. Should we be seeking out another therapist?? I'm just very confused and I feel like this is getting me nowhere!!
submitted by Bubba48 to AsOneAfterInfidelity [link] [comments]