Grace prayers for wedding receptions

Please don’t be too terribly harsh, I’ve been crying about this all day. See previous post from yesterday for context.
Husband and I have had our nikkah for a year now, and our reception and moving in together is in 2 months. It has not been an easy ride because his family is against the marriage and it took us years to finally reach the point where our wedding is officially coming up. He’s messed up monumentally a few times but made up for them and is a great husband.
I have uncontrollable angry outbursts at him when he triggers me. Usually about girls. His instagram habits bother me. He knows this and has gotten much better. But yesterday I found some stuff on his instagram that seriously hurt me. When I first confronted him I was quiet and calm but when he started to downplay, I lost it. Screaming very loudly, calling him names, threw his phone.
Regardless of what he did, I don’t want to treat my husband like this. He’s a gentle soul and has done truly so so much for me to make this marriage work. I adore him. But this recurring issue about his lax attitude towards females sets me off.
I know he’s putting in effort to completely stop this nonsense. He’s not cheating but he responds to messages and does things I just find inappropriate. I want to learn how to react calmly. He’s tired of my outbursts. I do this every couple of months when something like this happens. I’m overall just very easily irritated as a person too but this particular situation makes me unbearable.
I of course apologized profusely and cried on his shoulder for hours about how shameful I feel. He forgave me but told me he feels like I don’t respect him as a husband. He also apologized for the instagram stuff. I want him to feel respected, and I hate that I let myself go so crazy when something he does triggers me. I don’t want to lose him over this.
Any advice for me this habit? I’m starting therapy this weekend. JZK

First time poster, long time lurker! I was invited to a summer wedding and the invite says formal/black tie for dress code. It is an evening reception and I have no concerns there. My uncertainty comes in with the ceremony, it is mid afternoon in a church, so there will be several hours between ceremony and reception where guests will have time to kill. Do I wear the same thing I plan to wear to the reception to the church? Do I need two separate dresses for each part of the day? Same question for my husband. Does he wear his suit/tux all day or change in between? Does he need two suits? I don’t know why this feels so confusing to me.

Please don’t be too terribly harsh, I’ve been crying about this all day. See previous post from yesterday for context.
Husband and I have had our nikkah for a year now, and our reception and moving in together is in 2 months. It has not been an easy ride because his family is against the marriage and it took us years to finally reach the point where our wedding is officially coming up. He’s messed up monumentally a few times but made up for them and is a great husband.
I have uncontrollable angry outbursts at him when he triggers me. Usually about girls. His instagram habits bother me. He knows this and has gotten much better. But yesterday I found some stuff on his instagram that seriously hurt me. When I first confronted him I was quiet and calm but when he started to downplay, I lost it. Screaming very loudly, calling him names, threw his phone.
Regardless of what he did, I don’t want to treat my husband like this. He’s a gentle soul and has done truly so so much for me to make this marriage work. I adore him. But this recurring issue about his lax attitude towards females sets me off.
I know he’s putting in effort to completely stop this nonsense. He’s not cheating but he responds to messages and does things I just find inappropriate. I want to learn how to react calmly. He’s tired of my outbursts. I do this every couple of months when something like this happens. I’m overall just very easily irritated as a person too but this particular situation makes me unbearable.
I of course apologized profusely and cried on his shoulder for hours about how shameful I feel. He forgave me but told me he feels like I don’t respect him as a husband. He also apologized for the instagram stuff. I want him to feel respected, and I hate that I let myself go so crazy when something he does triggers me. I don’t want to lose him over this.
Any advice for me this habit? I’m starting therapy this weekend. JZK

As the title says, I'm wondering if I can not hire a videographer, but just an editor for my wedding. I'm very much into video creation myself (not huge edited stuff), but I obviously can't do my own wedding. I'm live streaming the ceremony and will record the reception with a tripod no problem. It's just the other stuff as I'm trying to keep the costs lower where I can. Got a bunch of family who'd be great a filling stuff (many of them have decent interchange lens cameras) Is this possible/recommend or should we stick hiring someone who will video and edit? Located in Sydney, Australia

As the title says, I'm wondering if I can not how a videographer, but just an editor for my wedding. I'm very much into video creation myself (not huge edited stuff), but I obviously can't do my own wedding. I'm live streaming the ceremony and will record the reception with a tripod no problem. It's just the other stuff as I'm trying to keep the costs lower where I can. Got a bunch of family who'd be great a filling stuff (many of them have decent interchange lens cameras) Is this possible/recommend or should we stick hiring someone who will video and edit? Located in Sydney, Australia

Hi Charlotte, I have a wedding story for you of a wedding I had the misfortune to attend, buckle up guys, this was a train wreck.
I (31f) was always very close with my Grandma. She taught me things like how to knit, she loved teaching me how to cook and when we did family walks in the huge local park, she would "take us to get lost in the woods", because she knew how much my brother and I loved adventures.
My Grandfather always had a parade of mistresses when my Dad and his brothers were growing up, and because my Grandmother was traditional and didn't believe in divorce, she got stuck with these women being practically waved in her face. Sadly til the very end, she loved my Grandad dearly. Myself growing up, from since I can remember, the latest mistress, we'll call her X, was in the picture.
My Grandma sadly developed alzhiemers which meant that my Grandad was even less discreet, parading X around to the point where he would invite her to meals we went to where my poor Grandma was present, the worst one being one where my mother was also present, and the dynamic was Grandad flirting with my mother whilst X gave him daggers, my Grandma not really understanding what was going on, and me just wanting the ground to swallow me up.
Almost 10 years ago my Grandma's health declined, and I would go and visit her at the nursing home, and take care of her each day. My Grandad would visit her and bring X along with him, which I found insulting, but boy had I seen nothing yet.
Sadly she died, and we had a beautiful cremation service followed by a wake at a fancy hotel. Some drama was caused by my Dad's mistress turned girlfriend (I know, it runs in the family), but overall it went smoothly.
A few weeks later, Grandad arranges the scattering of the ashes. He specified no Grandchildren were allowed, which upset me considering I had been with her til the end, but it soon became apparent why. My Dad came home and told me that Grandad, at the ash scattering, announced he was getting married to X, his mistress. I was mortified as to how distasteful it was, but he chose the hotel where he held the wake for my Grandmother, and they would be married in three months time.
I didn't want to go for obvious reasons but my Dad said I had to go so that he wasn't alone. It was the biggest shit show I've had rhw misfortune to witness.
A friend from a former job came along, her job being to ply me with alcohol throughout the day, and boy did I need it.
First of all, all members of my Grandad's family had to wear a flower corsage. I usually think they are cute but I didn't want to be associated with this shit show.
The ceremony itself was okay, I just tried not to pay attention and counted down til we could go to the bar, but afterwards my friend whispered to me "I especially enjoyed the part in the vows where they said with the exception of all others!"
For the drinks reception I had to endure my Grandad's pretentious friends coming to me to tell me how lovely it must be to see my Grandad getting married, and according to my friend, I had a fixed serial killer smile whilst she would run to the bar and swiftly press drinks in my hand.
We all had the meal and then the speeches, oh god, the speeches, I have never wanted to crawl under a rock so badly. First there was the best man speech, where he told the story of first meeting Grandad and X, telling everyone "it soon became clear what the arrangement was!" with a wink to the audience, and ended with a joke about my Grandmother being a frigid cow.
X's speech was sentimental bollocks about finding love, which is all well and good, but he was married to my Grandma at the time.
Her brother made a speech about how Grandad used to wait for X on the drive in his (insert expensive car here), again, whilst married to my Grandma.
The final straw was during Grandad's speech where he accidentally called X by my Grandma's name, and I walked out.
When I waited in the bar area, a staff member said she recognised alot of us, and I told her "Yeah, for Grandma's wake, this is my Grandad marrying his mistress at the same venue", and after thinking I was joking at first, the nice lady offered me the rest of the glasses of champagne that didn't get used during the toast as they would be tossed out anyway, and I gladly took them off her hands.
Overall I've never been so mortified in my life, not only was the whole thing incredibly tacky, but my Grandma would have been rolling in her grave.
My Uncle managed to escape this circus living abroad, but when he came to visit, they brought out a slice of wedding cake they saved it (English wedding cake keeps for months) and he later told me that when he left, he tossed it out of his car window as he drove off, hoping they saw him.
To add to the tackiness, when Grandad died, he left X a statue of a naked lady he had actually bought for my Grandma, and when we asked why, it came out that he bought it for Grandma, because it reminded him of X, and also to remind my Grandma that X was in the picture.
Sadly this shit runs in the family, as my Dad also had a few mistresses, but luckily I was mostly kept from that as my Mom divorced him when she found out. I have a wonderful boyfriend who luckily hasn't run a mile given my insane family story, and we plan to get married. The family joke is that we should marry at the same hotel as the one used for Grandma's wake and then Grandad's wedding, as we might get a family discount on the third event, but I think I have to much PTSD associated with the place.
Hope you all enjoyed my family wedding drama story, and hopefully this gets read!

Hello everyone!
I am a Bride2Be, and I want to post this not only to ask for advice but also to raise awareness.
My fiancé and I are planning to have our wedding in the Philippines, and we hired a Wedding Coordinator (WC) a year ago. Recently, I came across a review from another bride about a supplier that my WC recommended to me. The bride mentioned the price they paid for the exact package I am interested in. I was surprised because the package prices my WC sent me were different. Acting on my suspicion, I sent an anonymous inquiry to the supplier, and they provided me with a set of prices that are 4,000-5,000 pesos lower than what my WC quoted.
I have already paid a substantial amount for FULL COORDINATION (Package details below), so why are there still under-the-table deals to get more money out of me (the client)? If there is a referral fee, it should come from the supplier, not as an extra cost on top of the prices that are not disclosed to the client.
It's worth mentioning that before hiring my WC, I had already booked 30% of the suppliers for our wedding. As a hands-on bride, I've been looking for suppliers and most of the time, I contacted and booked them myself, even after hiring her. I made her job easier and I've been very reasonable and trusting.
What can I do in this situation? I believe this is a shady practice, and my WC is not acting in my best interest. I think she is taking advantage of me because I am an overseas bride.
___________________________________________________________________ Full Coordination PACKAGE 80,000 pesos CONTRACT SIGNED AND PAID
Preparation:

• Assist in determining and planning the budget and help manage to stay within the budget.
• Monitoring wedding timeline spreadsheet
• Assist in finding the perfect location: Church or Ceremony Venue, Reception Venue and/ or Caterer
• Refer and set-up appointment with various pre-screened Vendors: Wedding Gowns; Caterer, Printer, Florist, Cakes, Photographer, Videographers, Bridal Car, Sound System and other bridal needs to the last details.
• Assist in negotiations and reviewing contracts with vendors.
• Assist with wedding documentations (Limited to submitting of requirements only)
• Follow – ups and overall coordination with booked suppliers (through emails, phone calls and meetings)
• Monitoring and Management of deposits / balances /payments made to suppliers by the client.
• Assist in reviewing wordings and addressing of invitations.
• Assist in advising & coordinating schedules for measurements, fittings, pre-nups, trial make-ups and other wedding related appointments
• Recommend and source out gifts for the principal sponsors and bridal entourage
• Plan and coordinate Wedding Rehearsal if necessary. (additional payment)
• Coordinate and confirm with all the vendors chosen in reviewing details of arrangements.
• Instruct all attendants of their duties during the ceremony and reception
• Assist in conceptualizing Wedding reception program and preparing the wedding day timetable

Wedding Day

• 7 Professional Coordinators
• Head Coordinator
• Bride Manager
• Groom Manager
• Church Coordinator
• Program Manager
• Assist couple in confirming details, services, and final agreements with wedding suppliers (banquet manager, florist/event stylist, photographer. videographer, cake designer, musicians/band/strings/sound system, gown designer, stationer etc.)
• Assist in reviewing service contracts of previously booked suppliers
• Guest management and Registration, floor plan layout, and seating arrangements
• Provide an outline with exact time of reception program
• Help organize and route ceremony and reception materials (e.g. gifts for principal sponsors, entourage, offertory materials, souvenirs, etc.)
• Provide a CREW MEAL REPORT to the client for actual advice on cash allowances or meals required by supplier
• Preparation of church processional

“Psst, I see dead people.”
I was already awake by 6 AM, going to sleep early cause of being high does that to you.
Okay, I’m starting to remember now, I knocked out in the middle of the third quarter in Game 3 between the Timberwolves and Nuggets. Admittedly, I was already high as hell while watching, but could you blame me? What an awful performance last night, I was already losing hope by the end of the first half. I’m looking at these stats and I’m wondering how Mike Conley even managed to get more rebounds than Rudy. They didn’t have their head in the game
Honestly thought that today was a Sunday until around 12 PM. It’s easier to think that when you were smoking all morning. I hardly ever smoke earlier in the day, once I start sobering up, it starts leaving me kinda hazy. Thankfully, I was coming off of that as I was heading to work.
I clocked in at 4 PM, didn’t have anything too crazy for work today. It was a wedding reception for 50, wasn’t a really huge one, but hey, it all pays the same.
The only specific instructions that I was given is that I place the food out at a specific time span. I thought it was a stupid idea since it would mean that people wont have anything to eat after awhile. We usually just refill everything up until it’s all gone, this is just some unnecessary shit. And they end up changing their minds about it too once people complained.
I was mostly bored throughout the event. I guess it’s a good thing that it’s making me bored, shows how much this job has gotten easy for me. I helped out my brother set up some events we got later this week. It’s going to be some bullshit those days, but I’m trying to have some hope that it wouldn’t be.
Once the event was over at 10 PM, I started shutting this shit down. I wasn’t trying to stay here longer than I should’ve. I was asking the hosts if I could help box away their dessert or remove their decorations, they think I was being helpful, but I just didn’t want to miss my bus. I wasn’t going to wait a half hour for the next bus.
Unfortunately, they kept on dancing even after a half hour after the event was over. I didn’t bother asking any of my supervisors because they weren’t going to say shit about them overstaying since they’re spineless. And I can’t say shit myself because then they’d ask for someone above me so it’s no fucking use. My brother and I just asked for a coworker of ours to do us a favor by just heading down in the event space at 11 PM to just take all the dirty glasses and lock it up in a room so that my brother could clean it tomorrow. That’s how we get away with not having to stay when guests pull this kind of shit.
I wish there was a fee set in place for guests to deal with when they overstay, but this ain’t that kind of hotel. Even though it should be, we’re literally in one of the best spots to have a hotel at in the entire state, but these fuckers don’t like money it seems. So why do I still work here? Read the third to last word of the sentence before that question.
Song Of The Day: Kendrick Lamar - Not Like Us
Looking Back on 5/11/23:
I wasn’t gonna engage with someone in an argument or conversation if she was just going to be spitting out ridiculous shit, so I just ignored her ass. That lady was being racist as fuck, talking shit about my skin tone and hair. Embarrassing as hell to have been that drunk or on drugs that early in the morning.
Anyways if you’re gonna argue with someone, don’t even bother if they can’t argue in good faith. Don’t waste your breath to those who don’t want to listen.
I remember having Canes that day, that was probably the worst experience I had there. I didn’t even finish it, I threw like half of it in the trash due to how bad it was.
“Mischievous shit”, god, I definitely moved on from my ex faster than I remembered. Physically anyways. I don’t even remember what I did that night, it’s not like I would’ve been able to write about it if I did anyways. Some things aren’t meant to be all out in the open. The fact that I don’t remember the full details on what happened that night, well, I do remember some of it. I clearly wasn’t in the right headspace at that time.

I'd previously posted about a weird situation involving my wife and her trauma therapist. We'd always had a pretty good relationship (or so I thought). Last year she started seeing this guy for her PTSD related to childhood SA. They did some EMDR and after a couple months of trauma therapy, the therapy shifted into "sex therapy". Suddenly our 14 years of intimacy became unhealthy in her eyes and she began coming home weekly with new demands, new rules, etc that I tried my best to be supportive and receptive of. Ultimately her and her T decided that we (her and I) should take a break from sex in order for her to heal and reestablish intimacy. Which we did for a couple of months. There was also a weird issue where he said our insurance wasn't working correctly and saw her for free for almost a year. Things just got more and more bizarre and a few months later, she said she wanted a divorce. Said we were sexually incompatible and she labeled me as controlling and abusive. She began bringing up past events in a completely different context/reality than I remember them...pretty big events like us deciding to have a baby together (accused me of manipulating her to have a baby to trap her). This T also encouraged her to cease taking her psych medication and start hormone therapy.
So, we file our paperwork for divorce. I had raised numerous concerns that this guy was grooming or manipulating her and she said I was trying to control her. I've known in my heart that this dude manipulated my vulnerable wife, but what could I do? We did about two months of couples therapy before filing for divorce a few weeks ago. She moved in with a friend and we've been sharing custody of our 3yo son until we run through our mandatory 90 day waiting period for the divorce to finalize.
So...today I get an alert on my phone from her (our) cars theft deterrent system that it just left the state (we're 20 miles from the border). She'd told me she was hanging out with a friend today. The car ends up an hour and a half into the next state at a golf course. I do the distraught husband thing and drive to it knowing what I'm going find. And I was right. She's out there drinking beer and having a great time with her therapist.
I confront them immediately and he's like, "I'm a sports psychologist...we're doing therapy." I record the conversation, had snapped a few photos of them, but he's adamant that he's providing therapy and she just keeps saying they're just friends and I violated her privacy. Just to add, there are 7 golf courses in our (his) home town.
So here's where I'm at. I know my marriage is toast...but I think this guy is a predator. I'm going to report him to our state's governing body for therapists. I guess I'm here to ask for some Reddit wisdom...could he get away with saying they were "doing therapy?"He does advertise himself as a sports psychologist or something like that, but it's clearly BS.
Thank you all in advance. This is awful. I realize that driving an hour and a half to chase down my wife and catch her may make me indeed seem controlling but she gaslit me so hard over the last four months telling me that there was nothing going on with her and this dude...I guess it was good for some closure.

His ex sent me this message. Sorry it’s so long! Has anybody else gotten a similar message in the past? How did you react?
Message below: “It’s been over a year of me wondering whether I should just come out and ask you or message you… but being afraid that if I do, and I’m wrong, it’ll be a the biggest mistake of my life. I have begged and begged him to tell me what you are to him, and he denies having anything more than a platonic friendship with you.
I want to preface this message with, I have no ill will towards you, I just want some answers… answers I don’t believe I’m going to get from Jared. I don’t know if he’s mentioned anything about me. So here goes…
November 2022, I sent Jared an email, telling him I loved him, missed him, and though I didn’t require a response back, I wanted him to know how sorry I was for everything that had happened and things had ended. He responded with a lengthy email telling me he still fervently loved me and how he too was sorry for how things had ended. That email lead to the last year and a half of events.
December 2022, I drove down to Roanoke and surprised him at the Carilion garage. He left the hospital as fast as he could that night, and we spent the rest of that evening together, catching up, and he left for Key West two days later. Two weeks later, he came up to DC and we had a late birthday celebration for him at Clyde’s in Georgetown and went to see A Christmas Carol at the Ford Theater. A few weeks later we drove to Jersey to see Matchbox20, by now it was the end of January 2023. Almost every week off, for the last year, he would come up and see me, if even for only two days, or I would drive down to Roanoke and spend the week with him. We spoke about our past, the hurt, and future, he told me numerous times that when he pictured marriage and children, it was only with me, but he needed time. This part is important, and I’ll come back to it later. We celebrated my birthday at a restaurant in Navy Yard, two weeks before you guys left for London. Chris video chatted with that night while we were at the restaurant eating Wagyu, and they discussed the new shipment of sunglasses Chris had gotten for Miggieswear.
The weekend of the Super Bowl, he had come seen me earlier that week, the day after he left I came to Roanoke and left the day of the Super Bowl. He told me his parents were having a viewing party and he had to go home and cook. I’m now assuming he left my Airbnb and came to your place.
That February he planned a trip to London, with Nicole, Ryan and Chris, and what he told me were, Nicole’s “friends.” Nicole happened to post a picture of you guys sitting on the plane and I was shocked, why would Nicole’s friend be sitting between him and Ryan. I sent him a message while you were on that 6 hour flight, telling him that if he had been seeing somebody, then why didn’t he tell me? There was no point in us spending time together if he had moved on. His response to me was “do you even know what you’re looking at? I’m surprised you don’t recognize her, that’s Nicole’s friend. You’re jumping to a lot of conclusions right now and don’t know what you’re talking about.” Something in my gut didn’t believe it but I wanted to trust that, so I did. I put you out of sight, out of mind. When he got back, he told me how he wished I’d been there with him, we both love history and old buildings, it’s a place we would have found magical together. I don’t know who came up with the idea of going to London, but part of me always thinks I’m the one who put it there when I shared the pictures i had taken when I went there the year we had been no contact.
We went to a Kenny Chesney concert in Charlottesville that March when I got back from my family trip to India, and he got back from London. Between work, us both traveling with our families, we were excited to see one another. We were going to go to St Augustine, but because of the weather, we stayed in Roanoke and saw Kenny Chesney in Charlottesville. The original plan had been to spend the night in Charlottesville at a hotel, but we couldn’t get one last minute so we ended up driving back to Roanoke and sneaking into the basement at his parents house and sleeping in his bed at 3am.
A few months later, we went to Richmond, and stayed the weekend, exploring the city, and watched Hamilton at the Altria Theater. A few months after that, we went to Savannah and Atlanta, where he got a flat tire driving into the garage, and spent the rest of the weekend at a yoga retreat. July, he asked me to go to Boston with him and his brother, for 4th or July weekend, but I couldn’t because my siblings were in town. Every single week, he came down and either stayed with me, or made a quick trip to spend time with me…
This past September, I found out he took you to Justin’s wedding, and I broke. I needed more from him. I have known him, been intimate with him, shared my every fear, worry, I have brought him home cooked meals from DC and surprised him at work with dinner, I’ve made him care packages. I’ve made Ryan Easter baskets and sent him birthday presents and encouraged Jared to put him in academic classes, I’ve helped Jared look into private schools for Ryan, and weighed the pros and cons of the options. I had no expectations in return from him other than, at the very least, a mutual respect and HONESTY.
I’ve seen him quite a few times since September and I last saw him in Roanoke at the beginning of March 2024. We sat in front of each other, in his car before he went into work that Monday night, and he told me, again, that when he thinks of marriage and a future, I’m the only one he pictures a marriage and children with. I’m not saying this to hurt you, or to make a point, I’m saying it because i don’t know what to believe anymore.
I became suspicious of his relationship with you, when he mentioned going to Macchu Picchu and hiking through the mountains. As all women have the ability to find out details they might later regret, I did the same thing. Except I didn’t believe he had actually gone to Macchu Picchu. I knew his passport had been long expired since around or before COVID, and I knew he had renewed it before he went to London. But that was when I realized you were the girl in the photo that Nicole posted. When I confronted him about Macchu Picchu, he told me he had been joking and he had also already told me he’d been joking. He had NEVER told me it was a joke, he had actually refused to show me photos when I asked him for pictures from the trip… he had then proceeded to change the topic, which is what had even raised red flags in my head.
My point is, I have asked him point blank so many times whether you two have a relationship. You tell me you still love me, that you picture marriage and a family with me, but this girl is a part of your life, and you took her to a wedding with you, while I was on a trip with my siblings, you took her to London with you, and you continue to tell me she’s just a friend. I asked him again on Tuesday night/Wednesday Morning after he left work, if you two are dating, and he said no. He asked me why I’m so hyper-fixated on somebody who’s just a friend when he has a million other female friends.
In September, he told me he needed a month to clear his head, that he wanted to commit to me, but he was afraid and that he needed to get over the fear and roadblock of our past break up. I gave him grace and understood. So we took a 4 week break. Some time during that time period, he sent me a snap of doves, and said “doves, and swans mate for life.” He sent me Ed Sheeran songs telling me he wants to find his way back to me. “No Strings Attached… you are the one I love”
In November, he messaged me and told me he had a surprise for me and to look for something in the mail. He loves the Count of Monte Carlo, it’s one of his favorite movies, and he told me it was in reference to that. A few weeks later I got a candle, a silver 400 dollar Buddha candle from Thomson Ferrier. I didn’t understand the reference to the Count of Monte Carlo, but it was a beautiful gesture and present… especially because he knew how much little gestures from him mean to me.
Fast forward to January, I got another 350 dollar black skull candle from him, from Thomson Ferrier. At this point I was upset, angry and livid. I called my sister in tears that evening. I had come back to him because he told me he loved me, that he “has a fire that burns so deeply” when he thinks of me. If i had known that wasn’t true, i would have closed the chapter a year and a half ago. I don’t want $700 worth of gifts and candles, I want more. I want marriage, I want children, I want our lives to move forward, I want communication. Out of anger, I packed up the candle, his sweatshirts and clothes that he had left at my place this past year, and mailed them back to his house. I’m sure it’s sitting somewhere in his basement closet/ bedroom… along with his white Huq sweatshirt, a picture of us I had up in my house, and various articles of clothing.
What upsets me is that he didn’t just involve me this year, he involved my family. He sent my mom presents, my parents in return sent him gifts. My sister, parents and cousins messaged him asking him to come around more. There was no point in involving my family, if he was going to involve himself with you. There was no point in involving himself with me, if he was going to involve himself with you. Those leather Indian shoes sitting in his room, my dad bought those for him. That blue sweater, those green pants and that maroon shirt, my parents bought those for him just this last year.
I don’t know what he’s told you about me, but I will say this. I was your age when we started dating. I was 29 years old. He was single, that’s what everyone in our residency program thought. He would tell everyone how Shari left him one day, all of a sudden just got up and left. “I saw the look behind her eyes just change when she looked at me.” He would tell everyone his horrific dating stories. When i started dating him, there was no doubt in my mind he was single… but I was wrong. He wasn’t single, he was dating Devon, one of the nurses from Carilion, and he had been for the past 4 years prior to that. At one point when he moved to Norfolk, she had even moved in with him. Even Shari was visiting him in Norfolk during this time period. I would have never suspected it, nobody in our residency program did. It wasn’t until one day, when he told me his friends were visiting from home, and they were all going to a concert together, that I found out. Her profile picture was of the two of them together, and her Facebook relationship status said “in a relationship.” Out of my own naivety, i believed him when he told me she was crazy and obsessed with him. He told me, to him, they were just friends but she wanted more. Women do a lot of things, but no woman is dumb enough to think she’s your girlfriend when she’s not. When we moved back to our hometowns, Devon was there waiting for him. He disappeared one day for 24 hours, told me that he was helping his dad’s friend who was stranded in NC. A year and a half later, i would find out that was a lie and that he had been at a concert Florida Georgia Line concert with her. She had been visiting his grandmother with him, staying at his parents home. The irony is that a few weeks after he took her, he took me to the same concert in Scranton. Him and his family didn’t bat an eye when a month later, I showed up and was the “new girlfriend.”
Eventually Devon found out about his lies and left him, but again, stupid me thought she was a crazy girl who just wanted so badly to be with him, that she built their relationship up in her head.
Dignity, respect for humans, empathy, are the most important qualities in a human being.
What I don’t wish is for you to be in my spot in 5 years. He will paint you in his colors, make you fall in love with MB20, and take you to Augustana concerts, he’ll tell you that you understand him, and his heart in a way that nobody else does. He’ll bond with you over music, and send you songs that make you feel he’s talking about you. He is so good at making you feel seen, and involving you with his family. He’ll say he had a vision of a girl that looks like you, coming into his life, and here you are, his soul mate. And one day, the same way that Shari, Devon and I got lost in him, the reality of everything will come pouring down on you. Be careful, there are signs between the lines, and the smiles, and good times. Make sure you don’t miss those, whatever you decide.
My relationship with him, started off just like yours. Another girl on the periphery, and teetering the line of inappropriate. Everything you call him out on, will always have an excuse, and you will believe him because he’s the “good guy” who goes above and beyond for people.
I don’t wish for any woman to go through the pain I’ve gone through, the manipulation, the lies and the emotional abuse. I can’t tell you what to do, but I will say, be careful and don’t be blind to the small things that will one day become huge. The novelty will fade, and though Jared isn’t the devil, he has a lot of growing up to do at 40. It was not okay to toy with me and drag me through the mud this year. It wasn’t okay to minimize his relationship with you and lie to me about it. It’s not okay to, to this day claim to see a life with me and not commit to it. I deserve better, and you deserve better.
How men talk about their ex’s and other women is an indication about how they will one day talk about and treat you. That is the worst and best lesson i have learned. I’m 34, years of my life wasted, and he took another year of my life knowing full well, this is how it would end. He’s sat on the phone with me for hours talking about how stupid PA’s are and if you were going to not be a doctor, at least become an NP, who has better bedside knowledge. Why would he say that, because i suppose you’re a PA and it minimizes the significance of even having a relationship with somebody who isn’t as intelligent as he is. The lack of respect will always be there, you just have to look for it.
Dishonesty, and manipulation are a plague, and if that’s who you are at 40, it is who you will always be unless you recognize that something needs to change. Where there is no accountability, there can be no change. I’m not the exception, I’m the same as the two girls before me. He’ll show you text messages where he never responded to me, even though he replies on Snapchat where every thing is erased. I cannot believe i didn’t see the signs. He will make me look crazy and laugh at me, the same way he showed me messages from Jen, and Elisabeth, and Devon, and made them sound crazy to me. I guess that’s his MO. The same way he told me you were nothing to him.
I was going to send you this message, two months ago… i then decided not to because he convinced me he wasn’t dating you… I saw him less than a month ago in Roanoke, i begged him to tell me that he was in a relationship with you. He said he wasn’t, again, he told me he was going to a wedding alone with only Ryan and that he wasn’t taking you. I then begged him to tell me that we were done and that he didn’t love me anymore. His response was idk what’s going to happen a year from now, i know I’ll see you again. His response every time has been when im ready for a relationship, emotionally, do you want me to finally let you know? I don’t care to be with him anymore. I’m so over it but i really think you should know the type of person you’re dealing with.
He has put me through so much hell for a year and a half of my life, stringing me along acting like he’s doing me a favor while he works on his own mental health and claims to still love me when we are together.”
TLDR: my SO’s ex messaged me saying he’s been seeing both of us for the past year and a half. Has anybody experienced this before. She sent me pictures from the past year of them and their text exchanges

Hello all - potential 2025 bride here, considering booking Ball’s Falls at Niagara Conservation Authority, specifically the Big Barn for our wedding ceremony and reception. Anyone host/attend a wedding there and have feedback, thoughts, concerns, words of wisdom, etc.?

Hello- just a quick question.
I am getting married in July and we are having a full nuptial mass. It will be on a Saturday.
We just met with our priest again and I’m going through the packet and reviewing all the readings, prayers, etc., and I notice the Nicene Creed is not included in a Catholic wedding mass.
I really love the Nicene Creed. Is it something not said at a wedding? If that’s the case, can we incorporate it in? I’ve googled but can’t find a clear answer. I can also ask our Priest but I’m inpatient 😂 so figured I’d try here for now.
Thank you!!

Hi all! What's a reasonable budget for decor for a desi wedding in the bay area? We have two events: wedding ceremony and reception. We're looking for something colorful but not super extravagant and don't need florals from the decorator because we're sourcing our own. I'd love for it to be less than $7k for the two events. Is that reasonable? Also, if anyone recommendations for affordable desi wedding decorators in the bay area that would be great as well!

Ever feel like your spirit guides or past loved ones try to facilitate new beginnings and opportunities (first day of work, trips, e.g.,) to help onboard you smoothly? Almost because they hear your affirmations and prayers and want to and will gladly intervene and intercede when necessary. I started a whole new job in a totally different field (I was previously a teacher) and began a new career path in the medical billing department. It’s been a while since I’ve been in a “professional” setting as I was working remotely this last year, and forget how isolated I actually was, away from people.
The first person I met in my department office is so sweet. So sweet to the point where I was opening up to her and maybe shared a little too personal of things for work. After work, I started to introspect myself and my day. It is usually during this period where sometimes my spirit guides or even past loved will offer their input through implanting thoughts and giving me specific feelings that they are there and are listening. I felt my uncle’s presence and got the thoughts, “You have my big mouth and need to be careful.
Some things need to stay at home and do not belong at work. You’re a little rusty, aren’t you?” My maternal papa came through and almost agreed, and I felt his grace and that I got the “benefit of the doubt” this time but my uncle is right; I have to be careful and remember boundaries.
It is funny how even in death, certain loved ones want to still show guidance and authority. I feel blessed to be able to have them and the ability to feel and almost hear what they have to say; they have saved me from a lot of unwanted drama and unnecessary problems over silliness and my quirks. You live and you learn! Tomorrow at work and moving forward I’m keeping my big mouth shut 😂.

CMM.World & CMMTheology.org
The Great Harvest is here. Christ's Mandate for Missions and CMMTheology build strong, organic relationships globally as we worship, grow and equip together. Like Joshua and Caleb and the Apostle Paul, we see with faith what He sees in each person (to help each reach fullness), group (many streams and backgrounds in unity) and nations (sheep vs. goat nations). Our passion is to love, connect, equip and send with the simplicity, fullness, and power of the Gospel.
The Uncompromising Blissful Extravagance of His Presence! Inbox
By CMM.World CMMTheology.org - November 10, 2022
Dear Mighty One,
I see the Lord's eye upon us we discover by revelation the 'new thing' He is doing in our lives and of those of us who, beyond the present darkness, gaze into His eyes. The 'tuning fork' of Yahweh is orchestrating the sons and daughters of our living God in growing holy remnant unity to withstand as we stand with Him fearlessly in the boldness of the faith of God in this hour. Egypt is behind us, and the covenantal promises and prophetic words we have received (1 Tim. 1:18) empower us by His Holy Spirit to advance in warfare, humbly growing in the spirit of wisdom and revelation.

Yesterday as I encouraged some friends, I said, 'stay in the blissful extravagance of His presence.' Today I saw in Psalm 34 His eyes are upon us in vs. 8 & 9 and v:15 about the 'uncompromisingly righteous.' We are to be holy as He is holy. That leaves no room for any more compromise or seeking to please man or the traditions of men, being free of the fear of man, the religious spirit, and any demonic activity. We are seated in heavenly places with Christ Jesus. Lord, help us understand by revelation to walk in all the authority we have been given by Jesus Christ.
Psalm 34:8-9 'O taste and see that the Lord [our God] is good! Blessed (happy, fortunate, to be envied) is the man who trusts and takes refuge in Him. O fear the Lord, you His saints [revere and worship Him]! For there is no want to those who truly revere and worship Him with godly fear.'
v. 15 'The eyes of the Lord are toward the [uncompromisingly] righteous and His ears are open to their cry.'
Chuck Pierce shared this amazing word from Penny Jackson that is right on for this season: https://christsmandate.blogspot.com/2022/11/chuck-pierce-shares-powerful-word-from.html
May YOUR November be full of Thanksgiving and Praise for you and yours as YOU enjoy The Uncompromising Blissful Extravagance of His Presence!
Thank you for praying for CMM and all your fellow CMM Global Family worldwide. Pray for all the missionaries, schools, and students in CMM College of Theology in the US, Ecuador, Canada, Cuba, Myanmar, Nigeria, and Thailand.
Pray for the new wells and the living water and safe water recently drilled or soon to be drilled in Tanzania, India, Malawi, and Pakistan.
Pray for our upcoming Christmas gift campaigns to bless children and youth in many nations. Many of them are precious, beautiful children (orphans). As the Lord leads, pray about giving any amount to bless dear CMM children this Christmas. https://cmmworld.kindful.com/
Pray for each other, dear friends. We all know we each need prayers going up to Heaven for all those on the front lines. We each are on the front lines!
Please pray for me as I speak tomorrow online to a crusade with 8,000 expected to attend in Pakistan. In December, I will speak at conferences in Liberia and Kenya with fellow CMM Ordained ministers Robert Bimba (Liberia), Tom Omukhobero, and Daniel and Christine Oyoko (Kenya).
We are working on plans and trips for 2023. If you would like to have some of our awesome CMM family speakers for a conference in your area or would like to join or lead a missions trip, we would love to hook you up with dear friends in many nations.
Please join me in welcoming Dr. Louis Blom of Judea Harvest as Associate Director of Missions at CMM. This strategic alliance multiplies the efforts and impact in building the Kingdom of our God, for His glory. https://youtu.be/HXfP8tCySRc

Many blessings and shalom from us all here at the home office and around the world.
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Honoring and Celebrating the Class of 2022's 196 Graduates of CMM College of Theology Global Schools
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We are rejoicing! We just celebrated two of our six schools' graduations on June 4th in the US and June 11th in Ecuador and we thank the Lord for all He has done in their lives and will do in this new era. We honor the faith in action of each of the seventy-eight students (in the USA and Ecuador schools this year)of all ages and from different streams and backgrounds. We thank the Lord for the hunger, perseverance and faith to finish strong. Each one encountered the Lord in fresh new ways as their hunger and perseverance in faith reaped eternal change as evidenced in their dissertations and heavenly encounters. In the last few months we have graduated 196 students from our global schools. All glory to the Lord as we enter our 16th year of offering affordable, life changing accredited degrees around the world. Each year our school is led by the Holy Spirit to go higher and deeper in excellence in academic standards and spirit-led equipping in a truly experiential, interactive, a
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Highlights Of Our Amazing Trip To The Holy Land With Chris Reed And Bart Peacher Prov. 16:9 ' A man’s mind plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps and makes them sure.' We are continually blessed and in awe of how the Lord breathes and moves in our lives. As we press into the high calling of Jesus Christ and we grow in intimacy and trust by faith, His love, grace, and mercy unfold in surprising ways. I had not been to Israel since 2017. So much has changed in the world since then as we see the tremendous acceleration of the times and seasons. Chaos, control, and corruption are increasing at an alarming rate. Our only hope is in Jesus Christ and His righteousness. Divine Encounters Abound As We Are Led By Holy Spirit And Make Ourselves Available Many churches are led by their pursuit of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil instead of the knowledge of the Tree of Life. As we surrender fully to the Holy Spirit, we learn to walk in deep humility and attenti
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Strategic Connecting Toward Freshness and Fullness in God
CMM is strategically positioned with proven, trusted, indigenous friends in many nations activating, equipping, connecting and releasing the saints to reach their people and nation with the love of Father God.
CMM is cross-denominational. We are seated in heavenly places with Christ Jesus and the completed work of Jesus Christ on the cross assures us of victory, through trials, as we are trained to rule and reign with the Father's heart and love of justice and mercy and walk humbly before Him.
CMM is a 501c3 founded in 1978. We also handle donor relations for approximately 500 missionaries globally, ordained ministers, as we enjoy the Lord in fellowship, offering Christian accredited degrees globally, church planting, healing, counseling, orphanages, and prayer centers, creative arts, prophetic, humanitarian aid and disaster relief, medical, stopping human trafficking, leadership training and creative incubators for entrepreneurs, disaster relief, and connecting destinies.
Call 704-225-3927 or email office@cmm.world to learn more or to have one of our many CMM amointed, itinerant ministers speak at your church or group, in person or online.

St John Paul II: Encyclopedia Britannica
In lands where faith and love entwine,
St. John Paul II, your light divine,
A beacon strong, through shadows vast,
In your gaze, eternity's cast.
With wisdom deep and spirit bold,
You spoke of love, a tale untold,
In every word, a sacred vow,
In every touch, grace doth endow.
From Poland's fields to Rome's grand dome,
Your love for all, a sacred tome,
In prayers whispered, in deeds so true,
You showed the world what love can do.
Through trials dark, you held your ground,
In every heart, your love resound,
With hands outstretched, you healed the pain,
And washed away the marks of Cain.
Oh, Holy Father, sainted guide,
In you, love's endless depths reside,
Your legacy, a gift divine,
In every heart, your love shall shine.
So let us lift our voices high,
In praise of love that will not die,
St. John Paul II, forevermore,
In love's embrace, we do adore.

Hi! I thankfully have plenty of time to plan as we pushed our date back a full year (for a variety of reasons), and so will be getting hitched, on a weekday, Spring 2026.
We’re using an all-in-one service for our micro-wedding (<40 guests) that see you thru to the end of the ceremony, and then it’s on you how to handle a reception/what comes next. We’re thinking we can have additional peeps that didn’t make the ceremony guest list meet up with all of us after but considering we have a tight budget, I’ve pretty much nixed any options close to Central Park.
To make things easier I was hoping to keep it in the city, especially since it’ll be mid-week and so traffic will be HORRENDOUS to get just about anywhere… but have fallen in love with a lot of the Brooklyn venues mentioned on this sub. FWIW we’re in Queens and most of our guests live in/around the boroughs, but I will have some guests coming from out of town (and am also still trying to sort out where they’re gonna be resting their head) which is why I was hoping to keep the reception close-ish to the ceremony to minimize additional schlepping.
Please, oh ppl of Reddit, please share your advice and help this anxious over-thinker out!! TIA!

Hi! So this happend a couple of weeks ago (Mid- April).
Sorry in advance for the long post.
Essentially what happened was I was hired for an interracial couples Wedding. One side was being kind of prejudice against the South Asian side and didn't want to partake in any of the Sikh traditions. The couple ended up having a very decent blend of both of the Canadian Side and South Asian side and compromises were made on both ends and I think the week came together beautifully considering.
That being said when Ceremony day came I showed up to the second venue for the reception and the Canadian side of the family decided to hire a second photographer (no one told me this a head of time). The reason for this was basically because they didn't think a brown photographer would focus on that side of the family. Not that it matters but I am not South Asian so I think that idea was completely absurd.
Anyways the couple didn't know that side of the family was doing this and because of all the drama that surrounded their Wedding Festivities so far I just decided not to say anything and just let it go.
Now the issue is their Full Gallery has been sent to them and they are unhappy that the photos don't match. My editing style is true to colour that pulls a little warmer and the other photographers style is very much not how I edit. They want the photos to match and asked if I can either re-edit all my photos from the week (for events that the Canadian side wasn't even present for) or edit the other photographers photos so they match. I want to say it's more so the parents who are asking this of me but I don't think it's fair for me to re-edit close to 4,000 photos (keep in mind this is 4 days of events) or edit another photographers work. It really just irks me because the one side of the family was only present for 1 of the 4 days and now I am being asked to change my editing style to accommodate a photographer they hired for 6 hours of the total 30 hours I was contracted for. FOR EVENTS THEY DIDNT WANT TO BE APART OF AND WHERE NOT PRESENT FOR.
Has anyone else experienced this I want the couple to be happy but I will be honest I currently don't have the time to re-edit my own work or someone else's. A lot of this could have been avoided if they just gave me the raws and I edited them together. The couple said they love my photos but the one set of parents is just not happy that they look so different. Because surprise surprise I got a lot of candids of both sides and they want to use my photos in an album but want them to match.
How would you deal with this situation? I never thought to have a clause in my contract for something like this the only thing I say is that the editing style is that of what is reflective of my current portfolio and the photographer has final say in editing style.
How do I proceed? TIA for any advice or feedback.

Favorite Wedding Venue In/Around CT?
Hello, all! I just got engaged last week, and my partner and I are starting the search for a wedding venue.
We're looking to hold approximately 250 people, trying to stay at around 130-150/person for venue+catering+bar. We're looking anywhere in Connecticut
The wedding will likely be July-Sept. We are looking for indoor venues, with options for outdoor ie outdoor cocktail. We are looking for 1-2 venues depending on options to host both our hindu ceremony (day time) and American reception (night time). Typically our events are two days, Hindu ceremony Friday and American reception Saturday. In an ideal world, we are looking for a ceremony venue with large glass windows, high ceilings. For the reception, we are looking for a hotel wedding venue.
Our vibe is elegant, classic, timeless, with modern touches.
A few places that resonate with us so far (from online) are

• Aqua Turf Club- ceremony
• Downtown Hartford Marriott- reception
• Aria- ceremony