Seamless knitted baby cardigan

Managed to finish the baby blanket before she arrived!

2024.05.14 13:00 eyes2read Managed to finish the baby blanket before she arrived!

Managed to finish the baby blanket before she arrived!
Hi everyone,
I started this after my maternity leave started and was not sure whether I can make it in time. But luckily with a chunky yarn and nr 9 needles it grew rather fast and was done 1 week before the baby was born. 👣
Here is the pattern https://ravel.me/strawberries-in-brioche Which I somehow managed to follow (haha I'm really bad at following instructions 😅 have the same problem with cooking from a recipe). I had chosen a super fluffy chunky Alpaca yarn (Drops Wish nr 14 and 15) before I picked this pattern. The end result is super warm and fluffy too. It is quite big because I panicked midway and added 4 extra ball of yarn 😁 so the baby can use it next winter as well. Blocking was a bit of a challenge though so it's not perfectly square. I'm happy with the end result though. I love knitting brioche and brioche stitch with a fluffy yarn is a match made in heaven!
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2024.05.14 10:45 reddithenry 2023 Haut Brion

“This is an exceptional Haut-Brion, offering juice and elegant balance alongside classically structured layers, generous but restrained, sense of architecture and building blocks of a truly great Left Bank wine. Rippling with sinewy muscles, juicy and controlled, packed with cocoa bean, espresso, liouqorice root, but none of these flavours dominate, knitted together, with a vertical lift. 100% new oak, Jean-Philippe Delmas director, Jean-Philippe Masclef technical director, no outside consultant. 2035 – 2050” 98-100/100 Jane Anson, JaneAnson.com “A stand out wine from Haut-Brion this year and one of the most charming Primeur samples from the estate. A little sombre on the nose, quiet with dark fruit, blackcurrant and brambles. Not so open on the nose, but this wows on the palate - rich, dense for the vintage, weighty in the mouth, clearly ripe and so filling. Chewy and alive, this is brilliant with a buzz of acidity, a sharp, sour, tartness but all so excellently delivered. So charming and so cuddly, this wine wants you to adore it. Bright and voluptuous, and not many can say that in this vintage. Really so great and still with chocolate, mint, pepper, raspberries, and floral notes all the way through. A complete knock out because it has flesh, juice, brightness and style. A potential 100-point wine. 2034 – 2060” 98/100 Georgina Hindle, Decanter “The 2023 Haut-Brion was picked at the same time as the La Mission Haut-Brion, albeit the secateurs sheathed one day later, on October 6. The nose is less immediate than the La Mission and the fruit is a little darker: blackcurrant, juniper, hints of black olive and a light cedar scent. The palate is medium-bodied with fine grip and tension. This has superb energy, presenting a crescendo of flavors toward a complex and persistent finish that lingers in the mouth. There is real pedigree to this First Growth, and it will certainly give 30 to 40 years of drinking pleasure. 2030 – 2065” 96-98/100 Neal Martin, Vinous.com “The 2023 Haut-Brion is superb. Silky, soft tannins enshroud a core of black fruit, gravel, chocolate, cloves and licorice, building into a potent, sumptuous, dazzling wine. Exotic and racy, with remarkable polish, this has a ton of potential. It’s an especially sensual, seamless Haut-Brion. All the 2023 needs is time—probably quite a bit of it, especially for readers who want a full-on Haut-Brion experience. 2033 – 2083” 95-97/100 Antonio Galloni, Vinous.com
ÂŁ945/3 at BBR, ÂŁ1890/6 elsewhere
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2024.05.14 10:36 TheCradledDM Athos 36: The Other Side

be me; ex LizarDM
be also me; Adonis Valintellis (Tiefling Paladin), Thalia Milakos (Human Ranger) and Zaahir Kehmet (Earth Genasi Wizard)
the soldier stifled a yawn as he patrolled the sandy beaches of Kalikos
clouds hid the island from the moon’s spectral glow, casting the land into darkness and turning the often silver seas black as coal
his shift had been a long one and just as boring as expected
where once his mind had been sharp and alert, it now lingered on thoughts of a cold drink and a warm bed
his eyes scanned the shore superficially, passing over the same stones and grassy knolls he’d seen a hundred times before
on any other night, he may have noticed the discrepancies in the shoreline
the new rock that appeared almost boat-like on second glance
but alas, his mind was a thousand miles away, and the javelin hit him without warning
the soldier collapsed to his knees, gasping for air like a fish on land
his armour had spared him from the worst of the damage, but the javelin had done its job
stunned and winded, he was rendered defenceless against the four figures that emerged from the darkness
a thought crossed his mind to sound the alarm; but his limbs refused to move and his lungs pleaded for breath
one member of the pack split from the rest. A stout dwarf with a full beard and a grim expression
they approached the helpless man, drawing a sharply curved short sword from their belt
the soldier tried to move
tried to yell
but the dwarf closed the distance between them and cut his throat, putting a violent end to his struggles
wiping the blood clean from his weapon, Oryk hauled the body behind cover before jogging to catch up with his companions
the Order of the Twins moved like shadows in the night. Their passage muffled by the spells woven about their feet
that said, their infiltration still proved easier than expected
skirting the edges of the island, the party avoided common paths and watchful eyes; slipping between gaps in the meagre defences they encountered
their route took them just below the peak of the island; where a lavish home stared out across the ocean
in the distance, tiny twinkling lights just barely outlined the Athosi mainland
the house itself was lit up like a beacon in the night, and roaming globules of fire identified the few guards on rotation. Six or seven at most
less than a third of what they had anticipated
counting their blessings, the small band of adventurers navigated the narrow pathways around the house and approached the island’s southern side, where a lonely dirt road wound its way towards a grove of trees
they moved swiftly and silently through the long grass that grew on either side, but they needn’t have bothered
the road was unguarded, and the entrance to the grove lay bare
“this is too easy,” Cyrene whispered; fidgeting nervously with an iron band around her wrist. “Where are the rest of the guards?”
she, like the rest of her companions, had a dishevelled look to her appearance
a thinness to her features that implied more than a couple missed meals
Oryk shot her a stern look, and the half orc immediately shut her mouth
turning his gaze to the two half elves to his rear, he was answered with obedient silence
Maia had always been thin, but now she was practically gaunt
her eyes carried a weight, and an ugly scar split her lip on the left side
Iris, her sister, had once identified herself with long curly hair
now, it was cut short, and crudely so. As if done with an altogether uncaring hand
both twins wore the same iron band as Cyrene around their left wrist
a thin piece of metal that coiled around their limb like a snake
with a commanding wave of his hand, Oryk led the party through the grove’s northern entrance and into the trees beyond
moving like ghosts between the thin trunks and shallow underbrush, the group made good progress before they heard the sudden snap of a twig in the darkness
Oryk raised a fist and the advance came to an abrupt stop, scanning their surroundings with tense expressions
a series of soft whispers drifted between the trees, accompanied by the rustling of leaves and groaning of branches
the dwarven fighter drew his sica and his companions complied, unsheathing their weapons in response
they began to spot lithe, feminine figures peering out at them from behind the trees. Staring at the strangers with bright, emerald eyes
the women had skin like mottled bark, and hair that plumed about them like foliage
“dryads,” Cyrene declared, lowering her rhomphaia with the faintest hint of relief
Iris and Maia exchanged a look before lowering their own weapons, albeit keeping them close at hand
Oryk, however, raised his short sword threateningly, and pointed it at the nearest nature spirit
“get back in your trees and stay there. Interfere, and we will not hesitate to kill you”
the dryad in question retreated, but the others stood their ground as a frantic whispering filled the trees around them
something dangerous glimmered in Oryk’s eyes, and his fingers tightened around the hilt of his sica
“NOW!” he suddenly bellowed, his voice deep and commanding
the drayds scattered into the trees, leaving a myriad of foul curses and even fouler odours in their wake
Oryk gave a satisfied grunt and turned to leave, only to nearly walk into the dryad that now stood in his way
a spirit with speckled, ashy skin and a stern, stubborn expression
Oryk approached them with his weapon raised
“get out of my way,” he growled. “I won’t ask a third time”
the dryad stared down at him like a disapproving adult would a petulant child, and when it spoke, it did so with a voice like wind through a canopy
“if you were wise, you would return to your masters. You will not find what you seek here”
its eyes lifted to the party, as if directing its words to them
with a snarl, Oryk swiped at the dryad, only to be met by a cloud of pollen and stinging nettles
cursing aloud between bouts of frantic coughing, the dwarf fled the swarm and started rubbing his eyes, which had already begun streaming with tears
muttering under her breath, Cyrene approached his side and laid a hand on his shoulder
“come now, let me see”
lowering his hands to his side, Oryk turned to face her with a grimace, his eyes puffy and red
“Archons above, Oryk,” Cyrene cursed. “You should know better than to taunt a dryad”
as the words left her mouth, the band on her wrist suddenly tightened and the half orc gave a small yelp of pain
glaring at her through bloodshot eyes, Oryk gave the cleric a venomous look
“and you should know better than to speak out of line”
Cyrene’s hands fumbled at the metal around her wrist, refusing to meet the dwarf’s cruel gaze
the cuff continued to coil and squeeze; writhing like a living being as Cyrene frantically whispered a foreign chant beneath her breath
the words seemed to appease the magic item, and it loosened its grip in response
witnessing this cruel display of discipline, the twins began unconsciously massaging the band around their own wrists; as if reminiscing on a similar experience
shaking the pain from her arm, Cyrene set to work curing Oryk’s ailment, uttering a slew of healing spells
with his eyesight restored, Oryk sheathed his weapon and pushed past Cyrene, wandering into the trees
with little other choice other than to follow, the group set off after him
the party walked for some time before a sound other than buzzing insects and murmured curses reached their ears
a low, rumbling that echoed through the trees. Like a dull droning that came in ebbs and flows
once more the group came to a stop, and before Oryk could even turn to look towards the twins, they had already begun to move
creeping forward with the lightest of footsteps, Maia and Iris stealthily approached the sound, deftly avoiding any stray branches or betraying stones
the droning grew louder and louder, until the pair had stopped just shy of its source
peering around a trunk with sharp blue eyes, Maia scanned what lay ahead
the trees parted around an ancient oak, its roots deep and its branches tall
a hollow sat about half way up the trunk. A small opening just wide enough to put a hand or two inside
but the tree was not so interesting as what lay beneath
coiled around the trunk was a creature with a long, serpentine body
its scales, green and flecked with brown, were hard and interlocked like shields in a phalanx
its head, immense and filled with razor sharp teeth, lay curled just below the hollow of the tree
the low rumbling emanated from the monster’s chest, as it uttered a long, prolonged snore
Maia’s jaw tightened and her eyes flitted over to her sister
Iris’ face had gone pale, and her hand had instinctively dropped to grab at the empty sheath on her belt
a prize taken by their employer
the twins locked eyes, and shared a moment of profound fear
wetting her suddenly very dry lips, Maia gestured back towards the trees and Iris nodded in silent agreement
the two stealthily retreated, keeping their footsteps light all the way back to their comrades
Oryk almost jumped when the twins materialised beside him, emerging from the darkness without warning
“well?” he hissed, his voice rising above the droning snores. “What did you find?”
Iris frantically gestured for the dwarf to quiet down, as Maia shot a terrified glance back in the direction of the oak tree
only when they heard the low droning of the monster’s snores did the pair relax enough to answer
“dragon”
the word held in the air like a curse
Cyrene’s eyes widened, and had it not been for the band on her wrist, she most certainly would have uttered a prayer
even Oryk’s permanently affixed scowl faded as the blood drained from his face
when he finally spoke, he did so with no semblance of his usual condescension
“...how big?”
“8 meters,” Iris answered. “No more than 12”
Oryk nodded, his brow knitting together as he dropped into a crouch
“a juvenile,” he thought aloud. “Hasn’t reached full adulthood. Scorch marks?”
“none that we could see”
“good. Then either it’s too young to breathe fire, or it spits poison”
his eyes narrowed to points as he mulled things over in his head
the group kept quiet, forced to listen to the distant, droning snores as their leader considered their options
after a long stretch of time, Oryk took a sharp inhale and straightened his posture
“it’s asleep?”
his eyes shifted to Maia, and the half elf tensed
“we think so but
”
“we don’t know for certain,” Iris quickly interrupted. “We’ve never encountered a dragon before. We should call off the mission and come back more prepared”
a deadly silence fell over the group as the dwarf went still
“call off the mission?” he repeated
his voice was calm, but the words held a distinct edge to them
like the blade of a meticulously sharpened knife
“and since when did you make the calls in this party?”
Maia shot her sister a look, and Iris lowered her eyes
“never,” she answered
“that’s right. Never,” Oryk reiterated, holding the half elf in his steely gaze. “We do things my way, as we always have”
Iris’ clamped her mouth shut and the dwarvish fighter turned to look at his other companions
“unless you have all forgotten what awaits us if we fail? What will happen if we come back empty handed?”
he was met with silence and a slow shake of Cyrene’s head
“failure isn’t an option,” he continued. “If the drakon is asleep, we need to act now”
his gaze shifted to Maia
“so can you do what I need you to?”
the half elf swallowed and tried to slow her racing heartbeat
“I think so,” she meekly answered
“good. The rest of us will wait in position. We’ll flank the tree from three sides and-”
“-I’ll do it,” Iris suddenly interjected
Oryk’s teeth flashed in a grimace before he turned to face her
“I’ll retrieve the objective,” Iris clarified, meeting the dwarf’s gaze
“Maia is quieter,” Oryk bluntly retorted. “She stands a better chance of getting to the tree than you do”
“but with my magic-”
“-your magic that we need for the escape,” he interrupted. “We have a plan, stick to it”
he turned back to the front and began drawing out a rough plan in the dirt with his sica
“-while Maia sneaks in, we hold here to provide support. Once we have what we came for, we leave back through the northern exit”
Iris’ eye twitched, and Maia reached out to drop a hand on her sister’s arm
“Iris-” she quietly started
but her warning went unheeded, and Iris spoke up again
“what’s the point of saving my magic if we don’t get what we came for?” she argued
Oryk spun with a stormy expression, pointing his blade to her chest
“because I said so!” he snapped. “And you will do what you’re told!”
he may have stood half a head shorter than Iris, but in that moment, Oryk felt like a giant, and in the silence of the trees, his voice sounded like a clap of thunder
Iris’ face paled and Oryk realised what he had done
instinctively, the party held their breath; anticipating a monstrous roar, or the crash of falling trees
but after a few tense seconds, all they heard was the rhythmic rumbling of distant snores
the group letting out a collective sigh of relief that cut through the tension like a knife
tension that returned the moment Oryk opened his mouth
“do you want to be sent across the Chronaean?” he hissed. “Do you want to leave your sister alone?”
Iris’ eyes shifted to Cyrene, searching for some glimmer of support
instead, the half orc looked away, leaving the half elf to face their leader alone
“of course I don’t,” Iris mumbled
“exactly,” Oryk spat. “Stay in line, do what you’re told, and keep your mouth shut”
he turned to Maia with an expression that encouraged absolute obedience
“get the objective, and get out. Nod if you understand”
Maia gave a slight jerk of her head
“good. Now get moving”
the dwarf stormed off into the trees, and Cyrene quickly shot up to follow him
Maia and Iris exchanged a look of resignation before joining their trusted comrades
Maia stood in position by the edge of the clearing, mentally projecting her path to and from the hollow
it was a simple job, really
dart across the open ground
jump up to the low branch on the left side
climb over to the main trunk
grab the objective
and do it all again
simple
if it weren’t for the dragon in the way
Maia's heart began to pound in her chest until she felt a hand fall gently across her arm
she turned, meeting Iris' concerned gaze
“you don’t have to do this,” her sister whispered; practically breathing the words into Maia’s ear
“yes I do,” Maia answered, keeping her voice just as quiet. “You heard Oryk. We can’t go back empty handed”
“f*ck Oryk,” Iris cursed. “We’re only here because of him”
in spite of herself, a grim smile lifted the corner of Maia’s lips
it was a rare thing to hear Iris curse
“we could run, you know. Make a break for the mainland”
Maia’s smile dropped in an instant
“Iris, no”
“why not?” Iris replied earnestly. “We can make it. I know we can”
“they’ll catch us. And even if they don’t, what then? We’ve got nowhere to hide. No friends to help us. We’d be on our own”
“we’ve been alone before. We survived, didn’t we?”
Iris’ words were hopeful, but they couldn’t hide the desperation beneath
when Maia didn’t seem convinced, Iris took her sister’s face into her hands
“please don’t do this. I can’t lose you”
Maia’s eyes softened, and she placed her hands atop Iris’
“that’s why I have to do this”
she took a deep breath and tried to put on a half convincing smile
“you don’t have to worry about me. I’ve got this. I promise”
Iris’ thumb traced the scar across her sister’s lip
“I’m older. It’s my job to worry about you”
a frown fell across Maia’s face
“older by 10 minutes”
“and I’ll never let you forget it”
Iris pulled her sister into a tight hug
“don’t you dare get yourself caught”
“when have I ever?”
the two reluctantly parted, and Iris held her sister at an arm’s length
“remember. Once you have it-”
“-run like the Hounds of Chaon are after me”
a smile touched Iris’ lips, and the shadows rose up to swallow her
when they parted, the monk was gone
inhaling a slow, shaky breath, Maia composed herself, and refocused on the tree
30ft to the centre
branch on the left side
over the dragon
down to the hollow
reverse and get out
she exhaled slowly, letting the shake fade from her breath
she had this
Maia broke from the tree line, moving in a swift but stealthy manner
every step carefully laid. Every movement intentional
the dragon’s snores rumbled like thunder, growing louder with each step
before she knew it, she was beneath the low branch
taking a quick stutter step to gain momentum, she threw herself upwards, catching the branch with both hands
thankfully, the branch held firm, and Maia swung her legs up and around it
shimmying along inch by inch, she drew closer to the trunk itself, inadvertently holding her breath as she passed over the sleeping body of the dragon
its breath reeked up close. Like spoiled fruit and vinegar
it took all her strength not to gag
before she knew it, she was at the trunk of the tree and at the next step of her plan
hoisting herself up to a crouched position, she flattened her body against the side of the trunk and began sliding her foot along its length
eventually, she found a suitable foothold and began clambering across to a more central position
the hollow was just beneath her now
and beneath that, the massive head of the dragon
this close, she realised just how easily such a creature could snap her up
with her small frame, she’d be gone in one or two bites
pushing such morbid thoughts out of her mind, she leaned down until her head and arm were low enough to reach inside the hollow
her lungs were beginning to burn from holding her breath for so long, but she dared not exhale
she wasn't sure how good a dragon's senses were, but she wasn't keen to find out either
reaching her arm into the hollow, her fingers touched loose leaves and knotted wood
she pushed a little deeper, searching for any sign of her prize
something cold
something metal
but instead, she felt the hard back of the hollow
frowning, she pressed again, but still felt only the rear of the hollow
had she somehow missed it?
her fingers scrambled around, but continued to feel only wood and leaves
her lungs were really burning now, and she could feel her face flushing with colour from being upside down
regardless, she removed her arm and leaned her head down further, trying to peer inside
in the black gloom of a moonless night, a human wouldn’t have been able to see a thing
but even with her enhanced elvish sight, Maia was granted only the slightest advantage
just enough to make out the shape of the interior and the contents within
dried leaves
knotted wood
a couple insect husks
and nothing else
sure she had somehow made a mistake, she looked again and again
but with each scan, the truth became undeniable
“you will not find what you seek, here”
the dryad’s words echoed in Maia’s head, and with a cold sense of dread, she realised that the spirit hadn’t been speaking rhetorically
the amulet wasn’t here
and with that realisation, Maia’s lungs could hold on no longer
her breath escaped all at once, her awkward position driving the air out in an undignified huff
she clamped a hand over her mouth, but the damage had been done
she had made a sound, however small, and already her breath was mixing with the cool air
time slowed to a crawl as the dragon’s snores came to a stop
she watched in terror as its head, mere inches below her, began to stir
its nostrils flared; drawing breath with a deep, rasping inhale, and its eyes rolled in their sockets
the dragon’s jaws cracked open, revealing a black, forked tongue and rows of fetid teeth
rancid breath assaulted Maia’s senses, making her stomach turn and her head spin
she waited for the creature to open its eyes
to see the tiny morsel dangling helplessly above it
but they never did
to her greatest relief, the dragon remained asleep and blissfully unaware of her presence
relief swiftly turned to dismay, however, as the dragon proceeded to shift; its scales rippling like water across its long, serpentine body
the tree shook violently as the monster scraped against its surface, shearing away bark and causing branches to groan and sway
wrapping her arms around whatever she could find, Maia clung desperately as the shaking threatened to throw her loose
after what felt like an eternity, the vibrations mercifully ended, and the dragon returned to its snoring
but even after the tree had long fallen still, Maia found herself unable move; as if every single muscle in her body had frozen solid
in a moment of clarity, she realised that her hand had found her dagger in the chaos, and that the weapon was now clutched in an iron grip at her side
she almost laughed at the absurdity of the situation
as if a dagger would keep her safe if the dragon had actually awoken
nonetheless, she kept it in her hand, unwilling to relinquish the one defence she had
lifting her gaze to scan the surrounding treeline, she spotted the pale faces of her companions waiting in position. Intently following her progress with their eyes
Iris looked just as high sprung as she was. All but ready to throw herself into the open in order to save her sister
Maia silently prayed that her twin could keep her composure for just a little longer
wetting her incredibly dry lips, the rogue began scaling the tree; taking care to avoid any of the small twigs and leaves that had been shaken loose by the dragon’s shifting
upon reaching her chosen branch she paused, taking a moment to slow her racing heart beat
in spite of everything telling her otherwise, she needed to calm down
stress would lead to mistakes
and mistakes would lead to her death
feeling her muscles relax ever so slightly, Maia continued, stretching her body out to reach the low branch
her feet found purchase, and the rogue began creeping along its length
a few more steps and she’d be home free
“Maia!”
a single word
muffled and distorted, and yet agonisingly loud
Maia’s eyes dropped to the bronze surface of her dagger and saw a young woman’s face staring back at her, their eyes grey and piercing
there was a flash of familiarity in the half elf’s mind, but in that moment, she could barely recall her own name
a million thoughts raced through her mind as her heart pounded like a drum in her ears
one thought, however, screamed louder than the rest
run
Maia’s feet moved before the thought had even finished forming, propelling her from the branch a split second before it detonated into an explosion of jagged splinters
she hit the ground hard, feeling something give in her shoulder
she didn’t have time to dwell on it, as an earth shattering roar tore the world asunder
her feet were under her in an instant, and she broke into a sprint, not daring to look behind her
she knew that if she turned, all she would see is a flash of green scales and a mouth full of fangs closing in to end her life
the air began to reek of rotten fruit and then a body collided with her, throwing her aside
a cloud of noxious fumes ripped through the space she had just occupied, causing grass to shrivel and trees to wither
she felt hands on her arms and shoulders, and then Iris was yelling at her, hauling her to her feet amidst pained racking coughs
they didn’t have time to stop, barrelling through the trees in a mad dash to get away
as furious roars filled the air behind them, Iris stumbled through the underbrush, her legs unsteady beneath her
Maia looped an arm under her shoulder, and now the twins were supporting each other in a tangle of limbs
minutes passed. Or maybe just seconds. And then the two broke from the tree line onto an open road
sea winds rushed up to meet them, and Iris' legs fully gave out as she began greedily sucking in gasps of fresh air
“come on!” Maia urged, trying to drag her sister to her feet
but Iris was of no use now, her eyes bulging and her face flushed with colour
something ripped its way out of the underbrush and Maia turned sharply, instinctively raising the dagger that was still clutched in a death grip
instead of the dragon she was expecting, she found Cyrene and her rhomphaia, halfway through a cut that would have cleaved her in two
recognising each other at the same time, the pair lowered their weapons and turned to the wheezing half elf at their feet
concern flashing across her face, Cyrene dropped to her knees in preparation to cast a spell
before she could begin, however, Oryk emerged from the grove, blood splattered across his hands
“we don’t have time for that. Get her up!”
he raced past them, leading the charge back towards the beach
with a grunt of exertion, Cyrene lifted Iris into her arms like a baby, shoving her rhomphaia into Maia's hands
keeping a wary eye on her sister, Maia followed the half orc as she began jogging after their leader
as they ran, Oryk settled into pace beside Maia, shooting her a questioning look between grunts of breath
“do you have it?”
the half elf's shoulders fell, and she quietly shook her head
“it wasn’t there”
Oryk’s face turned a dark shade of red, and a vein bulged in his head
“what do you mean it wasn’t there?!”
“the amulet is gone. We missed it”
a stream of vile curses flowed from Oryk’s lips, and Maia wisely chose to keep her eyes forward and mouth shut
they reached the beach in record time, and Cyrene carefully laid Iris down into their waiting boat
as Oryk and Maia began pushing the vessel into the rolling surf, the dwarf gave her a hateful glare
“hells spare you when they find out we failed”
“we...haven’t...failed...yet”
Oryk turned his ire on Iris, who lay curled across the edge of the boat trying her best to suck in what air she could
“we...know...where...its...going,” she continued between strained, wheezing breaths. “We...still...have...time...”
leaping into the boat with a splash of water, Oryk waited just long enough for his companions to get in before heaving away with the oars
“we’d better. For all our sakes”
he sliced through the water with powerful strokes, driving them into deeper and darker waters
Maia slunk down beside Iris, taking her sister’s hand into her own
Iris dropped her head onto Maia’s shoulder, and the twins watched as the shores of Kalikos drifted further and further away
First Post: https://www.reddit.com/CradledDnDStories/comments/x8zwpv/athos_1_a_new_world_of_opportunity/
Last Post: https://www.reddit.com/CradledDnDStories/comments/1b2taqi/athos_35_mirror_mirro
Next Post:
submitted by TheCradledDM to CradledDnDStories [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 06:01 Choice_Evidence1983 AITAH for separating from my husband because he refused to get a vasectomy?

I am NOT OOP, OOP is u/AdhesivenessMurky204
Originally posted to AITAH
AITAH for separating from my husband because he refused to get a vasectomy?
Thanks to u/queenlegolas and u/Direct-Caterpillar77 for suggesting this BoRU
Editor’s Note: added paragraph breaks for readability
Trigger Warnings: PTSD, mentions of abortion, domestic abuse, verbal abuse, sexual assault, rape
Original Post: April 28, 2024
My husband (28M, who I will call Jack) and I (27F) have been together for 4 years, we have 2 young children and I am pregnant again. I have been pregnant for what feels like most of our relationship. I got pregnant 4 months into our relationship. We got married a month before our daughter’s 1st birthday and ended up with a honeymoon baby. After our son was born, I talked to my OB and she put me on birth control and I have been taking it militantly.
My daughter is now 3 and my son is 2. A little over a month ago I discovered I am pregnant again, despite taking my birth control religiously. Abortion is banned in my state, and the pregnancy was discovered too far along to attempt to obtain one out of state. While Jack and I were nervous, we also love being parents and decided that 3 young kids would be a challenge, but 3 was a good number for us. Then we went in for the first ultrasound and got some unexpected news - it’s twins.
Things have been tough financially, and while we were stressed but excited for a third child, we were not expecting a third and fourth child. Beyond the finances, I am the primary caretaker and I know that twins is going to be a lot, three children under 5 is already a lot, but 4 children under 5 is going to be really really difficult for me. Physically, I am tired of being pregnant. I’ve been pregnant or breastfeeding the majority of our relationship. It’s exhausting, it feels awful, and I don’t recognize my body anymore.
Four children is enough. I don’t want more. I told Jack that I was done with pregnancy, I’ve been pregnant enough, I’ve been experimenting with different types of birth control for over a decade and I still can’t stop getting pregnant, abortion isn’t a valid option where we live, we need something more permanent. He agreed, and suggested an IUD, I told him no - if it did fail then it could cause an ectopic pregnancy which could kill me, especially where we live. I’ve had both control fail me multiple times already and I’m not taking the chance, so I suggested a vasectomy. He was not open to the idea, and was even upset that I suggested it and told me I should get my tubes tied. I told him a tubal ligation is a much bigger surgery and I could be recovering for weeks during which time I wouldn’t be able to work or take care of our 4 young children, but he could ice his balls for a day or two and be done with it. He told me that not getting pregnant was ultimately my responsibility, and topped it off by saying “that’s what your body your choice means, YOUR body, so YOU choose.” That’s when it went from a discussion to a full blown fight.
See, when I was 19 I had another birth control failure with my boyfriend at the time (who I will call Tom). I wanted an abortion, Tom did not because he was opposed. I told him I was getting the abortion since it was my body and my choice, and Tom said some horrible things to me, including threatening me. I broke up with him and got the abortion. In response, Tom ended up following me one night and attacking me. I don’t want to go into detail but it was horrible, and he ended up going to prison for a number of charges related to the attack. Not only do I have a number of scars and some long lasting physical effects, but I have PTSD as well.
Jack knows about my history and diagnosis, and has known from the beginning. I have a pretty prominent facial scar so I was upfront about it early on in our dating. Jack always presented himself as very pro-choice, so I was shocked that he would say that. I got really emotional and started crying and shouting, and it turned into a full-blown fight.
Eventually I said that birth control is a two-way street and so far I’ve been the only one managing it and he said “and now we have 2 kids and 2 more coming, great job.” I told him he sounded like Tom and he got super pissed, basically said how dare you compare me to him, and maybe he might want kids one day with someone who doesn’t compare him to her felon ex-boyfriend. I was stunned and horrified. I said “well then let’s not waste any fucking time,”then packed up myself and the kids and drove to my parents place.
It’s been about a week since the fight. I’ve spoken with Jack a few times and he has since apologized and said he was out of line and was speaking from a place of anxiety after finding out about the twins, but also that I said things that were out of line and it was wrong of me to insist he undergo a medical procedure. He said that can move on from the things I said and that he wants to see his children and be a family again. I told him no, that I didn’t want to “move on” from the things he said to me. I can’t just get over that and I think we need space apart. Jack was upset by this and while we talked I brought up getting a separation agreement to manage custody and finances while we figure things out. He did not like this suggestion, said we didn’t need to pull the courts into this.
I haven’t told a lot of people about what’s happening but my family and a couple close friends. My sister and best friend both think I should throw the whole man away, but my brother (who is the only other one married with kids) thinks that I’m being extreme for what sums up to a fight between two scared people who both said nasty things. My mom is trying to be supportive but is occasionally reminding me that I “don’t want to be a single mother of 4” and telling me not to let my PTSD drive my decisions, while my dad is being completely unhelpful (he thinks jokes are helpful - like calling me Doorknob because I “can’t stop getting knocked up”, telling me to let the oven cool down, real knee-slappers). I don’t know what to do. My kids are happy to be at grandma and grandpas house but they miss their daddy, I’m 4 months pregnant and already uncomfortable as hell, I wish I could go back to being a happy little family but I’m so hung up on the things he said in that fight. Am I destroying my family over one bad night? Am I being unreasonable for asking my husband to get a vasectomy?
Edit: I've noticed a lot of people recommending condoms. I have gotten pregnant with condoms twice. Our second child and my first pregnancy were both conceived using condoms properly (correct fit, put on correctly, single use, not expired, no breaks, etc). I do not trust condoms enough to not fail a third time. I know the failure rate is supposedly small, but it's not personally small enough for me. Edit to the edit: I'm sorry, I didn't expect so many comments so fast and I can't keep up with them. By the first pregnancy I mean the pregnancy with Tom. With Jack I was on the patch when I got pregnant with our daughter, condoms with our son, and the pill with the twins. So far I haven't ever suspected that Jack has tampered with our birth control and always presumed that I'm a fertile Myrtle.
I recognize the comments and just want people to know I'm seeing the suggestion. I'm not dismissing it, but the thought of it is deeply upsetting and has provoked a lot of anxiety. I just wanted to make it clear that if the suggestion is only based on the condoms, that the condom pregnancies were with two different partners. While I know I always used condoms properly with Tom, I do believe that Tom could have been fully capable of sabotaging the condoms.
AITAH has no consensus bot, OOP received mixed reactions of NTAs and YTAs
Relevant Comments
deepsleepsheepmeep: NTA. Your husband is though. Your body has already been through A LOT. A tubal ligation is a serious surgery and you are right about being out of commission for a while when recovering. If he is more concerned with an imaginary future wife than he is for you, I don’t think there is much hope for this marriage.
We have 4 close friends who all got vasectomies. None of them bitched about it like your wimp of a husband. We actually had fun vasectomy themed parties for them.
On the off chance he does end up getting a vasectomy, make sure to do the follow up appointments. One of the vasectomy fab 4 did not follow through and ended up with a post-vasectomy baby.
OOP: Thank you, I feel like this is a lot of what has been so upsetting has been that he's thinking about some imaginary future wife when I'm right here, his actual wife, the mother of his children. It's like he's already imagining a future without me.
 
Update: AITAH for separating from my husband because he refused to get a vasectomy?: May 3, 2024
I didn’t expect so many comments and literally couldn’t go through them all. It seemed like the majority of people said I was NTA but I did get a lot of YTAs telling me I was trying to force him to get a medical procedure and telling me to get one instead. Besides already addressing my reasonings why I made my request in the original post (which I want you to read with real "per my last email" energy), I in no way am *forcing* him to have a medical procedure, but I am saying that I do not want to be with a partner who is not willing to be snipped. This is an issue of compatibility. The number of children you want, the methods of birth control you’re willing to use, those are issues of compatibility and a reason relationships end all the time. If he doesn’t want to be sterilized that’s fine, but then that means that we’re not compatible anymore, since it means he wants more children and I don’t. Beyond that there were some YTA comments and some DMs that were just nasty, calling me a murderer and saying my body is a cemetery. Sadly enough, I expected those types of comments, because I know there are a lot of Toms out in the world.
First I wanted to address a couple things that kept coming up, because last post turned into thousands of comments that all said about 5 different things, so to avoid my inbox becoming another echo chamber:
You’re 100% going to have a C-section anyway so just get a tubal while giving birth.
No, I’m not 100% going to have a C-section anyway. Twins are not an automatic C-section. With my birth history there is no reason to presume that a C-section is in my future. My OB agrees, and has discussed the possibility as doctors have to do but also said that based on my past two birth experiences, I'm a "perfect candidate" for vaginal delivery.
I also am not going to mince words: tubal ligations are *less* effective than vasectomies with a *much higher* likelihood of an ectopic pregnancy. Ectopic pregnancy can *kill me*. In fact I got a PM from a woman who is a fellow fertile Myrtle who had an ectopic after a tubal. I am rejecting birth control options that, if they fail, would lead to my likely death. I don’t want to be pregnant again but I also don’t want to die and leave my children motherless, and in no way should anyone assume that traveling to another state to obtain an emergency abortion will continue to be an option in the future - we live in scary times, and Gilead is a real possibility. The comments seemed to have the vibe that people think that ligations are magically more effective than vasectomies and vasectomies are more of a whisper of sterility than an actual sterilization method so for those in the back VASECTOMIES ARE MORE EFFECTIVE THAN TUBAL LIGATIONS, FULL STOP. So I really need y’all to shut up about it.
Go to another state and obtain an abortion anyway.
I appreciate the personal offers to help I received in DMs deeply, but no. I’m in my 2nd trimester, which I know is still legal in some places, however I am at a point in my pregnancy where I personally as an individual do not feel comfortable obtaining an abortion, considering I would be *even farther* along by the time I could travel (which is not only finances, but logistics as well). I am 16 weeks pregnant now, these babies aren’t just clusters of cells to me anymore, and I’m not going to expand on that since it’s not up for debate.
Why not adoption?
With love and respect to everyone who has gone through adoption in all its aspects, adoption is absolutely not for me. This is a thought process I already went through 8 years ago, and now that I’m a mother and not a scared teenager I know it’s even less for me. I personally could not go through with it and come out the other side intact. Going through a full pregnancy, having my babies, and then being separated from them would break me.
Leave him and give him full custody of the twins
No. Because going through a full pregnancy, having my babies, and then being separated from them would break me. Jesus, some of y’all.
Just have a sexless marriage.
No. I love banging my husband, obviously lol. I don't want to be in a sexless marriage and anyone who has been to an abstinence-only high school knows that abstinence is not the way lol. There were a lot of comments assuming I would be perfectly fine withholding sex from my husband and having na dead bedroom, and I wouldn't. I have a sex drive. I'm going to want to bang my husband. Wanting to have sex with your spouse is *normal*.
What you would do about birth control if you divorced and dated in the future?
I’m not thinking of dating anyone else right now, because I’m thinking more about saving my actual marriage instead of an imaginary relationship. And if theoretically I did, I would probably seek out a partner who was snipped or was ready to be to be honestly, or a woman. I’m bisexual so there’s a very good chance that my future partner wouldn’t have the right parts to knock me up anyway lol.
Jack is sabotaging your birth control
I clarified my methods in the original post (as per my last email), but I did want to address this because it came up a LOT. I don’t have reason to believe that Jack sabotaged my birth control. A number of other fertile Myrtles showed up and brought up they or their family members repeated pregnancies in the face of birth control, including tubals. Accusing my husband of reproductive coercion for no reason other than I keep getting pregnant is a big leap and a weighty accusation. I am not the only fertile Myrtle out there, there's a reason there's a whole term for it.
Your husband is a narcissist, abuser, psychopath, and he does no childcare
My husband and I historically have a really healthy and loving relationship outside of this fight. In fact, this fight is the first time we’ve really had a fight, we’ve only ever had little arguments that we’ve been able to talk through. He’s an active father, the reason that I do the majority of childcare is due to circumstance between maternity leaves, our job schedules and the fact that I breastfed my babies. Someone also presumed I’m the breadwinner, which isn’t quite true. Jack makes more than me, but we do not have deeply significant differences in our incomes. When he is home he does his fair share of cleaning and cooking (arguably more than me at times), and parenting. That being said, the things he said in the heat of the moment were deeply concerning, and we’re addressing that together.
So to get down to the nitty gritty of the real update: since the last time I posted, Jack and I have sat down together and had a real come to Jesus talk. I’m not going to go through the whole breakdown, but it basically boiled down to this: it’s the vasectomy, but it’s more than the vasectomy. It was wrong of me to compare him to Tom but it was wronger of him to weaponize my trauma against me in a very malicious way. The way he intentionally used the same language my abuser used in an effort to hurt me was not acceptable and damaged the trust between us. He agreed it was not acceptable and said that in the aftermath he was horrified and ashamed his own words, and that he (as an explanation and not an excuse) kind of snapped under the stress. Oh and what he said about his “next wife” was not an indication of him not being committed to me but was because he felt hurt and wanted to hurt me back. He has apologized numerous times and seems to feel genuinely bad about it.
As for the separation, I am still going forward with it. I need space and time and I need to take that before the babies come. I am still staying with my parents who, for the record, are not sick of me or the kids. We’re a tight knit family, I only moved out when I moved in with Jack, and my sister moved out about a year ago so they have been empty nesting, and my mom doesn’t like that we live “too far” (an hour) away. What I have realized with space and time is how deeply triggering it was, in a way that I cannot explain to those without PTSD from DV, those who know will know. It’s deeply unsettled me and I’m having a hard time “getting over it” so to speak. There is now a lot of fear of my husband that was never there before and it’s going to take a lot to repair that trust and sense of safety. I cannot make a decision while I’m in this space, and I am addressing this with my personal therapist. Overall, I told him that if he wanted to stay married to me I needed two things from him: marriage counseling and a vasectomy, and even then I still cannot guarantee him anything. He understands, but I do not know what will happen with the vasectomy right now, we focused more on talking about the fight, but he is very aware that it's now a dealbreaker. And we have a marriage counseling appointment set up for next week. I'm hoping that counseling will bring some clarity to the situation, and in the mean time for the next couple months I'm focusing on giving my kids lots of cuddles and preparing myself for two new babies to come into my world, with or without Jack.
Additional information from OOP on her relationships
OOP: I've been through a trial to convict my ex-boyfriend of trying to kill me because of an abortion in a deep red, deeply religious area. I've definitely heard worse things, and I typically have pretty thick skin. That being said, I am pregnant and pretty emotional, so it's not the best experience. That being said, I do appreciate the level-headed comments when I see them through the sea of comments kind of saying the same stuff over and over. I'm not reading a lot of them if what I can see in the comment notification starts off nasty, so a lot of it is just inbox white noise. My favorites are the ones that start off with "I'm not going to read that BUT..." and I just think lol same. Like you don't want to read my post but expect me to read your comment that was made without even reading the situation? lol nope. And there are a lot of people conflating "providing someone with a hard choice" with "forcing someone into a medical procedure" and it just makes wading through for the actually helpful comments more tiring. Thank you though, I very much appreciate the kindness. Sorry, I've gotten so much of the same nonsense I guess I needed a little vent lol.
OOP on wanting her husband to make a decision and be on the same page
OOP: I want to be honest with him about where I am emotionally because I want him to make an informed decision. While the vasectomy is a deal breaker, it's really my secondary concern. My primary concern is the way he acted during the fight and his intention exploitation of my trauma because he was mad and scared. I think that telling him "get the snip to stay with me" and then deciding to leave anyway because there are deeper issues and/or I don't feel safe anymore would be cruel. He deserves to have the full picture before he makes a choice, doesn't he?
If he doesn't want the vasectomy, that's his choice. It's not what I want, but it is what it is. If he wants to call it quits at 4 kids, then it is what it is and if he secretly wants to be the next Nick Cannon then it is what it is he should be free to do that. That is part of why I don't know where he is on the vasectomy right now and we didn't really discuss it much when we talked, I'm focusing on discussing the bigger issue for me which is trust and safety within the relationship. The only way for him to make an informed decision about whether or not he get a vasectomy is for him to have all the information about the situation. If that makes him want a vasectomy less, then it is what it is. It's not about making him want to have a vasectomy. It's about being on the same page.
 

DO NOT COMMENT IN LINKED POSTS OR MESSAGE OOPs – BoRU Rule #7

THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT OOP

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2024.05.14 04:03 Greedy-Albatross-570 I’m going to be an aunt!

I got the news today and I’ve never been more excited in my life. I started thinking of all the things I can make for the baby, like knitted hats or a little bunny. My brother is much older than me so we never really had a close relationship but he’s almost all the family I have and I can’t believe there’s going to be a new addition.
submitted by Greedy-Albatross-570 to BenignExistence [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 03:56 KAYGO_Safety KAYGOÂź KG18N Seamless Knit Nylon Work Gloves (EN 388 RESULTS: 4131X)

KAYGOÂź KG18N Seamless Knit Nylon Work Gloves (EN 388 RESULTS: 4131X) submitted by KAYGO_Safety to u/KAYGO_Safety [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 02:15 notrapunzel Washable natural yarn for baby items? I'm in the UK

Hi all,
Im looking for solid colour yarn to knit a cardigan for a baby. I don't want to use synthetic materials if possible, but would like it to be washable. I need it in Aran / worsted weight for the pattern.
Any recommendations please? My local yarn shops don't sell anything suitable.
submitted by notrapunzel to knitting [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 02:12 Whatdoido2594 Tops for small backs/big boobs (GG cup)!

Ok ladies,
I've looked through all your suggestions and have tried all the shirts on at As colour, Uniqlo,and just about anywhere else I can find in Brisbane and I'm stuck 😂
I'm looking for shirts (not cardigans or sweaters or long sleeves knits, as I sweat so much in anything long sleeve in Brisbane winter), that I can wear with jeans in the day for winter. I'm about a size 12-14 in shirts depending on the fit etc.
As I've got a small back but a big ol chest, everything looks terrible on me. I've also got very small shoulders so anything rounded tends to really bring my frame down, and I'm short so anything too oversized absolutely swamps me.
Does anyone have the same problem? Any suggestions? Im looking for basics and something more elevated than basics! Years ago I used to be able to find shirts,but it seems to be slim pickings these days!
TIA :)
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2024.05.14 01:22 Particular-Ad-6663 My Second Attempt at Knitting a Cardigan!

My Second Attempt at Knitting a Cardigan!
Finally completed this snuggly cardigan. I messed up on the sleeves because I forgot to increase closer to the armhole join but that's a lesson learned for next time. It took me a couple of weeks, with breaks in-between, to finish but despite the mistakes, I'm happy with the end result, and, it fits me! The button band is crocheted as I did the one before. I'm debating adding some wooden buttons but I'm not in any rush to put them on, if you guys have an opinion I'd be happy to hear them. 😁â˜șïžđŸ˜
King Cole Indulge Chunky Yarn. 7mm needles for the ribbing, 10mm needles stockinette stitch and the band I used a 7mm crochet hook.
No pattern. I just worked out how big I wanted and made 1 x back panel, 2 x matching front panels, 2 x sleeves and crocheted the button band.
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2024.05.14 00:21 Similar_Zebra4973 My sister's behavior is getting worse and worse. What should I do?

My sister(17F) is the baby of the family and has been treated pretty well since she was a child. We already noticed that she was a bit different when she was younger, she cried every day until she was around 14 and was pretty confrontational. Every few day an argument would spark up and sometimes(but very rarely) it would get physical. It was excused as a quirk she just had(since I was also a bit of a rowdy child who argued a LOT) but it was only these past few years that her behavior began to get worse. She started become more argumentative, cursing a lot, and began to treat me(18F) and my siblings(all 20+) condescendingly and talks down to us.
She began to leave home to visit her friends in the neighborhood or go out with her friends, which was allowed as long as she alerted my mom to where she was going. However, when my mom didn't want her to go to an event with her friends, she contested the refusal which led to a huge argument. A few days later, she snuck out and worried everyone in the house. I had to call all her friends to ask where she went. When she eventually came home, wayyy after the sun had set, she was angry that we questioned her on where she was and why she left. Another argument happened and she ended up upset that we told her that her behavior wasn't appropriate for a Muslim girl. This was the first of three times she snuck out without permission and they all ended the same, her believing she was a victim and wasn't at fault at all.
More recently, like I mentioned earlier, her behavior towards me and my older siblings is completely out of line. Sometimes she treats us as if she expects us to wait hand and foot for her, ordering us around and making snide comments about us. I caught her wearing my clothes without permission 10 TIMES, all of which I asked to to tell me first. She didn't. I had to resort to storing my clothes in my older siblings room, which is usually inaccessible to her, to prevent her from wearing them any longer. Ive also caught her stealing my snacks before, though i just let it lie. Arguing with her is extremely tiring and just make the mood of the house go down. She also uses brushes and products that my siblings bought with their own money without telling them, and sometimes finishing it from them all together. We all know it was her because she is the only one interested in styling her hair. Its also one of the reasons we(me, her, and some neighborhood friends) are late to school almost every day. I should have suspected something was going on at that point because I had already caught her with her head covering half off or showing her neck/chest.
She is especially interested in asking which of the siblings are the most attractive. She even asked our parents that question multiple times. She begins arguments that blow out of control over the smallest of things. A couple months ago, she was upset that I was using the family TV to watch a show and tried to order me to get off so she could watch herself. When I pointed out that she could use her chromebook or phone, she replied that she didn't want to. She only wanted to use the TV. I also had my own devices I could have used, and would have if she was watching something with another one of my siblings, but her command didn't agree with me. Even so, I was willing to let it go so I told her that I would finish the rest of my episode(20 minutes) then hand it over. As you probably guessed, if turned into argument because she wanted to use it at that exact moment. My oldest sibling had to interfere because she was just about screaming the whole house down. It wasn't a one time thing either. I rarely use the family TV since I have my own devices and almost ever other time I use it, she suddenly has a problem with me doing so. Whenever I point out that she can watch on anything other than the family TV, she always doesn't "want" to, even when I'm trying to watch with another sibling.
There is this one specific incident that sticks out to me where she crossed my boundaries. While I can't remember what the actual argument was about, I remember the result. I'm not good at arguing at all, nor am I comfortable doing so despite how many I get into. My older sibling asked her to talk through the issue with me with I was happy to do, but remember, I'm not good with words. I asked her to talk through text instead so we could cool our heads and sort through our thoughts. She protested at first before agreeing. While I was typing out my grevienxes and trying to fix the problem, she plopped a chair in front of me and tried to talk it out with words instead. I left obviously and was extremely upset that she crossed my boundaries like that. It may seem minor but I couldn't help but notice that she regularly crossed my family's boundaries after that incident.
One of her most extreme changes was the way she dressed. She began to favor more tight dresses and occasionally pants(my family is not in the school of thought that allows wearing pants only). Since I go to the same school as her, I witnessed firsthand how she would go out of her way to hide the fact that she wore pants only from my mom, from wearing a skirt to school just to take it off later or covering it with a long cardigan. She knew for a fact that my mom would be upset and tried to hide it. When she was eventually busted, a long argument following it, she promised not to do it again. She tried to be more sneaky about it, especially around me, but I eventually caught her once again. Me and my siblings resorted to hiding the pants for a while but eventually had to return them.
At this point, we had multiple interventions just for her behavior. She even had behavioral therapy scheduled even if she protested going sometimes. I'm not sure if she is still going to this day. It's no surprise that she had some oddities with her behavior since my whole family is on the spectrum, but everyone else calmed down with age. She just takes it to new heights.
The final straw was when me and my siblings found her on social media when she left without permission, again. She blocked us and anyone that followed us from all her social media accounts, which should have been suspect. Turns out, she was wearing tight, figure revealing clothing, showing her hair, and her neck and chest were on full display. Almost all of the videos were her lip syncing to music with makeup on. One that especially shocked us was a suggestive video she posted. Note that her accounts are NOT private, so anyone could see this. She knows that doing all that she was doing is haram given that she tried her hardest make sure we didn't find out.
Me and my siblings are planning to contront her about the social media posts she made next week, but I'm not sure how effective it will be. We already made plans to make some of her behavior harder for her to do again by inconvenienting her whenever she does it, but I know it will end up in her blowing up over it. I was warned specifically to not engage with her because she likes picking problems/taking her frustrations out on me the most because I am the closest to her age.
As you noticed throughout this post, if you confront her directly about her actions she'll take it as an argument, so is there any way to subtly influence her behavior without her noticing? Or just anything to help guide her onto the right path?
Tldr: My sister is consistantly misbehaving and its just getting worse the longer its left alone. I need help or just any advice with how to help her stop misbehaving. Any suggestions would be appreciated.
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2024.05.13 23:15 oftenfrequently Comparing the HTT strategies for each of the main families

Comparing the HTT strategies for each of the main families
Fair warning, this is gonna be a long one :)
I started working on this for my own purposes because I’m fascinated by the similarities and differences between the HTT styling approaches Kibbe recommends for the different ID families, but then thought it might be helpful to share with the sub. I always see lots of mention of “lines,” but the overall HTT approach for each ID is sometimes (often) oversimplified. Plus all the other very fun elements that make up a HTT are, imo, getting short shrift! There are a few users who have posted amazing full HTTs for their IDs and I'm hoping even more people will be inspired to explore.
So what even is this post?
Basically, I went through the styling directives in Metamorphosis (Chapter 4) for the main families and directly compared the recommendations for the IDs on a number of smaller, more discrete variables because my brain finds it more digestible that way. I only did the main families because “you’re a [insert family here] first and foremost!!” is a thing regardless of your ID ;) And I thought it was more interesting to compare the elements of the pure families without the influence of any other undercurrents. Also it just would have been a lot of work to do all of them 🙃.
A few notes before getting to the good stuff
  • I tried to mostly focus on the words Kibbe uses to evoke feelings rather than specific items, since the book was written in the 80s and clothing is obviously quite different.
  • Some of the things that fall in the middle of a scale have debateable positioning since the middles are sometimes hard to compare (ex. Is a moderate pinstripe more angular or less angular than a soft-edged plaid? My vote was more angular but your vote could be the opposite!) I included all of the language I used to determine placement on the scales so you can make your own call if you want.
  • I disincluded some, ahem, charged descriptors in a few IDs but I don’t think it changes the overall picture painted of what that ID would be looking to channel in their HTTs
This post includes all of the scales I compared the families on in 6 main categories - silhouette, fabric, detail, prints, color, and accessories - plus some keywords that came up for each family that give the overall impression of the HTT. I might make a second part later with key similarities and differences between the approaches for each pair of families, but we'll see! I'm also interested in any discussion here or observations that others might have on the various categories :)
And of course you can always read Metamorphosis for yourself in full here, which I highly recommend!

1. Silhouette

This section is related to the base silhouette of an outfit - the overall shape of garments that make up a HTT and how they relate to one another. For the purposes of this category, I'm defining "ensemble" as the pieces look related or like they were purchased together, which I believe is the sense Kibbe uses it in.
https://preview.redd.it/8earo8fbm70d1.jpg?width=1965&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=40f17625fbfc45cc723b9cc83d447111428d8b02
Shapes
  • D - “keep shapes sharp and geometric. Triangles, rectangles, and everything sculpted, sleek, and elongated, with crisp edges.” “square, sharp shoulders”
  • R - “keep your shapes rounded with soft edges! Circles, ornate swirls, and intricate flowing shapes” “shoulders should be curved”
  • C - “slightly geometric or slightly curved, blend the same shapes together in your look” “slight, crisp shoulder padding”
  • N - “geometric shapes with soft or rounded edges are the key. Rounded-edged rectangles. Soft oblongs, rounded-edged squares, irregular shapes, and soft asymmetrics.” “soft-edged shoulder pads are very good”
  • G - “small, sharp geometrics” “sharp edges and crisp tailoring” “crisp” “sharp edges and extreme tailoring and construction” “sharp shoulder pads”
Outline quality
  • D - “Always straight, with elongated draping that is sleek”
  • R - “your outline should always be soft and flowing” “lots of gentle draping everywhere” “soft fluidity”
  • C - “smooth and symmetrical with the emphasis on controlled and even edges, soft, straight lines, or smoothly curved lines - softly tailored or slightly flowing.”
  • N - “a relaxed, straight line is the outline of your look”
  • G - “sharp, straight, and staccato” “severe lines with sharp edges” “broken, staccato, animated outline. Utilizing many short vertical lines and many short horizontal lines is also effective.”
Closeness of fit
  • D - “always tailored and sculpted” “streamlined shape” “tailored and sleek” “the more tailored the better”
  • R - “showcase the lush curves of your body” “Sleeves should be tapered at the wrist” “waistline should always be emphasized, with soft gathers, folds, draped sashes, and lightweight and supple belts to give a cinched effect” “[Jackets] should be fitted at the waist”
  • C - “very slight draping in constructed garments” “crisp and finished cuffs” “tailored pleats” “narrow and tailored [jackets] with a smooth outline.” “lightweight unconstructed jackets are fine when they are kept sleek and narrow. Blazers, cardigan-style, elongated Chanel (not cropped) are all good choices” “softly tailored”
  • N - “softly tailored, always unconstructed” “Your outline should be fairly narrow and slim, in a loose and easy way.” “Dropped waist detail (loose sashes, overbloused tops, ties, etc) is excellent, as are slightly dropped shoulders.” “Relaxed shapes” “relaxed and easy fit” “dresses should be simple and unconstructed, with a narrow shape and a relaxed outline.”
  • G - “Precision fitted and crisply tailored” “[a] precisely fitted silhouette is crucial to your look” “Sharp and narrow waist definition.” “very fitted” “[skirts] should be very fitted at the waistband” “Pants should always be very sharply tailored with outlined or animated detail at the edges (waistbands, pleats, crisp cuffs).” “Skin tight stretchy pants are excellent” “Very tailored [blouses] with sharp edges and crisp detail (collars, cuffs, pleats, etc.)”
Length of garments
  • D - “Long, vertical lines are essential.” “generally [jackets] should be long (ending at the mid-thigh area), although a very sleek, Italian-style might be cropped (be sure this has an extremely sculpted, streamlined shape)” “straight and long [skirts]” “a long hem” “long cardigans or pullovers”
  • R - "lengths should be kept gracefully long as uneven hemlines (mid-calf), and short as the tapered styles with an even hemline (mid kneecap)" "[for sweaters] short lengths with waist detail"
  • C - “standard length is best [for jackets] (just below break of hip)” “slightly longer jackets are possible when the corresponding skirt is elongated to match.” “moderate length [skirts]”
  • N - “Elongated [jackets] (ending from the upper thigh on down.)” “Moderate length [skirts]” “Very short skirts for fun/funky looks.” “Nearly all styles [of pants] are excellent, from very casual to very dressy
 short, cropped, or long.” “Any and all lengths [for sweaters]”
  • G - “Short, cropped [jackets]” “Straight, sharp, and short [skirts]” “A slightly flared hemline [on skirts] may be slightly longer (top of the calf). Anything extremely long is very tricky, and must have a slit and be pencil slim.” “[For pants] Short lengths, anywhere from cropped at the calf to the top of the ankle.” “Short, cropped cardigans” “Short cropped jackets, vests, and boleros work well with dresses for you”
Cohesion
  • D - “keep individual pieces blended together in an artful way for elegance”
  • R - “include an artful blending of plush textures, draped fabrics, and luxurious colors” “avoid any kind of harsh contrast between top and bottom”
  • C - “A clean, unbroken silhouette is your most elegant statement! Think ‘head-to-toe’, and blend everything accordingly.” “Use [separates] carefully and sparingly” “Make sure colors, textures, and prints blend together”
  • N - “Separates are extremely exciting on you, and should make up the bulk of your wardrobe” “you’ll do better with an artful mixture of patterns, textures and colors than you will with an overly matched look” “designer sportswear” “definitely mix n’ match in the most sophisticated sense of the word”
  • G - “A use of well-coordinated separates with lots of animated and colorful detail can be very exciting to your look.”
Some random observations from me about this category
  • N fam has a truly impressive amount of versatility in terms of the length of pieces they're recommended, probably because they're the only family that's really strongly encouraged to go whole hog with a mix and match/separates-forward approach (a superpower tbh).
  • Although the scale of pieces recommended are obviously quite different, the words he uses to describe the shapes for D and G fams are extremely similar. Definitely two families that benefit from an emphasis on crisp sharpness and angularity.
  • I thought it was interesting that he used "softly tailored" in both the C and N fam sections, although the effect they're going for is very different (blended understated elegance vs. relaxed funky easy vibes).
  • He never uses the word "wide" in the N fam section. He does, however, use "narrow" and "loosely tailored" a number of times 😈 No oversized shapeless potato sacks here!

2. Fabric

This category is pretty self-explanatory I hope!
https://preview.redd.it/94e76p19190d1.jpg?width=1976&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=816214030ae525dd16ec2e071426eab1e571c544
Definition
  • D - “fabrics that hold a defined shape are necessary”
  • R - “fabrics that drape easily” “flowing”
  • C - “beautiful, luscious fabrics are an important element in your understated look” “very slight draping in constructed garments.”
  • N - “loose and easy”
  • G - “must always be crisp, able to hold a defined shape, and be tailored easily”
Range of textures (how many different fabrics can they use)
  • D - “Moderate to heavyweights are best, with a matte finish and a smooth surface” “textures should be tightly woven, and shiny fabrics should be very stiff and ultraglitzy”
  • R - “softly woven fabrics” “ultrashiny fabrics” “ultrasoft or plush textures” “sheer fabrics” “any kind of sparkle is excellent”
  • C - “Matte finish or slight sheen.” “Luxurious to the touch” “lightweight textures” “smooth knits” “smooth chiffon and elegantly beaded fabrics for evening.”
  • N - “All soft textures are excellent” “any fabric with a rough or nubby surface” “any wrinkly fabric works well” “all woven fabrics” “knits are excellent in nearly any weight and thickness, from very finely woven to very heavy and rough” “Plush velours, suede, and soft leather are perfect” “drapable fabrics are best kept to heavier weight jerseys.” “A matte finish is far superior to sheen for daytime” “In the evening, you can go very glitzy with hard-finished sheens”
  • G - “a flat surface or light texture is best” “finely woven knits, especially when ribbed and skinny, are good choices.” “matte finish is best, although hard-finished sheens can be very exciting (especially metallics)”
Weight
  • D - “Moderate to heavyweights are best” “occasionally lightweight fabrics can work if they are extra-structured in the design of the garment”
  • R - “lightweight fabrics”
  • C - “moderate weights. Lightweights in very constructed or tailored garments.”
  • N - "knits are excellent in nearly any weight and thickness, from very finely woven to very heavy and rough." “moderate weights are best, although textures can easily be lighter”
  • G - “usually your fabric will be of moderate weight, though lighter weights that hug the body are excellent”
Some random observations from me about this category
  • Again lots of similarities for G and D fam as far as structure and matte finish, although D also has heavier structured wovens while G has fine knits.
  • R fam and N fam get by far the most diverse recommendations as far as fabric and textures go (again a ton of versatility in N fam!). Seems like you really can't go wrong with something sparkly, shiny, glitzy, or plushy if you're in R fam. And for N fam it sounds like you get to mix far more textures into one HTT than everybody else does, which is exciting!
  • I thought the emphasis on flowing for R fam was interesting. It makes total sense - I haven't read too deeply into R since I am clearly not one lol - but for some reason I had flowing associated with N in my mind.
  • I really love the C recommendations myself - "luscious fabrics" just makes me think about burrowing in a cashmere blanket haha. I could definitely picture Grace Kelly as I was reading them.

3. Prints

Also self-explanatory!
https://preview.redd.it/nn24my93490d1.jpg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3a8d47c3a4d4d5984b6cac8d9deeccdf7da834c4
Pattern
  • D - “bold and geometric: stripes, zigzags, asymmetrics, and irregular shapes.” “Think Picasso and strive for a contemporary feeling”
  • R - “rich and luscious with the emphasis on an abstract, watercolor blend (think Monet). Swirls of color, flowing together, with soft and rounded edges may be used in abundance.”
  • C - “symmetrical, evenly spaced, and regular or realistic patterns. Understated prints (pin dots, pinstripes, checks, blended plaids, herringbone, symmetrical paisleys, etc.)”
  • N - “casual styles that are soft-edged geometrics (plaids, stripes, paisleys, etc.) and funky prints in irregular shapes (abstract asymmetrics, leaves, animal prints, etc.).”
  • G - “Prints should be sharp, colorful, and animated. Small geometrics and angular asymmetrics are excellent. Most of your prints should be very contemporary in feeling (“Picasso-ish”) although humorous styles that are outlined and caricatured can be quite stunning on you as well.”
Contrast
  • D - “Bold color combinations and high-contrast blends work best”
  • R - “swirls of color, flowing together”
  • C - “Make sure colors, textures, and prints blend together” “understated”
  • N - “generally have a softly blended edge”
  • G - “colorful and animated” “outlined” “contrast”
Scale
  • D - “bold”
  • R - “luxuriously large: oversized florals or feathery shapes are especially lovely”
  • C - “understated”
  • N - “moderate scale to slightly large”
  • G - “small”
Some random observations from me about this category
  • Again lots of similarities for D and G for the type (sharp geometric) and feeling of prints (contemporary/Picasso) with the main difference being large vs. small scale (don't worry, they're about to diverge hardcore 😂)
  • R fam is recommended significantly more abstract and organic prints than everyone else. I also thought it was interesting that both D and R call for larger-scale prints - finally something in common!
  • For C fam it seems like the most important thing is that the prints blend in and are understated rather than drawing attention to themselves.
  • Preferring high contrast and sharp prints vs slightly more blended and soft ones seems like a notable difference between D/G and N fam.

4. Garment Detail

This category is related to the details within the confines of the outline of a garment. So things like necklines, collars, effects like beading and sequins, trim, buttons, etc etc.
https://preview.redd.it/342pwi6y390d1.jpg?width=1971&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=64115f1045c7a3cb6d9ac1d6d843754ca943a603
Shape - sharp vs soft
  • D - “angular shapes” “sharp edges” “clean, angular necklines (plunging v’s, skinny turtlenecks, high Mandarins, slashed collars, halters
)” “anything tailored (crisp cuffs, sharp pleats, sharp lapels, etc.)”
  • R - “soft” “[Sleeves can be] very soft and flowing” “lapels should be curved, rounded, or shawl-collared” “gathers, tucks, or bouffant shapes” “any draped, gathered, or shirred touches are wonderful accents”
  • C - “clean, tailored necklines” “crisp and finished cuffs”
  • N - “Any unconstructed or loosely tailored detail works well.” “Simple necklines
 are best, and you should concentrate on open necklines for your air of casual chic” “lapels should be tailored, notched, or clean (lapel-less).” “Cuffs should be very plain.”
  • G - “Detail should always be
 sharp” “very crisp, staccato, broken up, and multicolored” “lots of crisp trim” “lots of outlining (collars, cuffs, waistbands, lapels) with piping of contrasting colors or fabric, braiding, beads, etc.” “Small, crisp pleats.” “Sharp, angular necklines - also small” “Small, crisp ties (ribbon, leather, etc.)” “Small, tailored lapels or crisp lapel-less with piping.” “Small, crisp cuffs.”
Scale - large vs small
  • D - “bold, sweeping geometrics”
  • R - “oversize bows, flouncy ruffles, and delicate lace are always good choices”
  • C - “[detail] should never call attention to itself”
  • N - “pleats should be soft and deep” “You can use small touches of hand embroidery or rough lace and eyelet for very simple trim.”
  • G - “Detail should always be small” “Small, crisp pleats.” “Sharp, angular necklines - also small” “Small, crisp ties (ribbon, leather, etc.)” “Small, tailored lapels or crisp lapel-less with piping.” “Small, crisp cuffs”
Complexity - clean vs intricate
  • D - “detail should always be clean and minimal”
  • R - “intricate, ornate
 with an emphasis on framing your face” “Sleeves should be tapered at the wrist with intricate buttons” “any kind of sparkle is excellent (pearls, sequins, beading, etc.)” “belt buckles should always be intricate” “the more intricate or antique looking your buttons are the better” “ornate detail” “ornate necklines”
  • C - “clean, simple, and minimal - just enough to add an elegantly understated touch.” “never call attention to itself” “clean lines” “minimal detail” “minimum of detail”
  • N - “detail should be kept minimal. Plain and simple is best for you.” “gathers should be minimal” “simple tailored styles with minimal detail” “Simple shapes with easy fits” “Minimal detail”
  • G - “an overabundance of detail” “You can never wear too much detail! An abundance of it and everywhere in your look is one of the most effective tools you have for capturing your animated effervescence!” “Detail should always
 call attention to itself (not blend into the lines of your garments)” “lots of animated and colorful detail” “Collar, cuff, lapel, and waistband detail (outlining, trim, piping, ribbing) are essential”
Some random observations from me about this category
  • A very stark divide here between the families that lean minimal/clean (C, N, D) and the families that lean complex (R, G)!
  • Even though R and G both call for a lot of detail, G fam seems to like it literally everywhere (but especially at the edges) while R focuses on framing the face. Another difference between them is that G detail is high contrast, sharp, and colorful while R fam's detail tends to the ornate, flowing, intricate, and sparkly - very different shapes I think.
  • Finally a category where N fam is not running away with the versatility haha - it seems like a more minimal and clean approach to detail really helps them shine.

5. Color

Y'all know what colors are :)
https://preview.redd.it/5he7hmfk790d1.jpg?width=1949&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=bc59971dc9518bfbd276300feccba5838f4d7971
Number
  • D - “Always think ‘head-to-toe’ with your color schemes” “All monochromatic schemes are excellent”
  • R - “include an artful blending of
 luxurious colors”
  • C - “Make sure colors, textures, and prints blend together” “monochromatic schemes are excellent, although you do not need to be limited to just one or two colors.”
  • N - “Color is an area in which you should have lots of fun! Strive for zip, verve, and lots of pizzazz with bolds, brights, pastels, vivids, and wild color combinations - anything imaginative.” “Break all the rules when it comes to color! Mix ‘n match with ease.”
  • G - “lots of animated and colorful detail can be very exciting to your look” “Your use of color should be bold and sassy; break all the rules here! Multicolored splashes are perfect. Bright and shockingly colored accessories played against a dark or light background. High, sharp contrast and wild color combinations are all very chic on you. Break your line with color!”
Effect
  • D - “color combination should be bold but elegant. Combining bright shades with dark shades achieves this with ease.”
  • R - “should emphasize a watercolor palette of soft pastels and luscious brights.” “rich, luxuriously blended colors” “pale neutrals
 are your best accents”
  • C - “accentuate your smoothly blended visual outline. This means that a mixture of colors in an outfit should blend together in intensity so as not to disrupt your clean and smooth silhouette.” “The key is to make sure the tones (intensities) blend, instead of contrasting.”
  • N - “Strive for zip, verve, and lots of pizzazz with bolds, brights, pastels, vivids, and wild color combinations - anything imaginative. Neutrals work well when they are used in beautifully textured fabrics
 but you will feel a little dull without a few bright accents, either in accessories or jewelry.” “Colors can be very wild and unusual if you wish, or more muted and earthy-looking”
  • G - “bold and sassy” “Multicolored splashes” “Bright and shockingly colored accessories played against a dark or light background.” “High, sharp contrast and wild color combinations”
Some random observations from me about this category
  • It's been said before but D fam's inability to do anything but monochrome has been greatly exaggerated. Outfits can have high contrast colors as long as they still read bold and sleek!
  • I found it interesting that both C fam and R fam call for a blended effect.
  • Color seems like a key category to focus on for both N fam and G fam - bold color kings/queens 👑

6. Accessories

The category for everything else - bags, hats, shoes, jewelry, belts, etc etc.
https://preview.redd.it/ek7fu7oz790d1.jpg?width=1923&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7c24f3db63656cef4a8da916665ba0f19893cc86
Scale
  • D - “Belts should be bold and wide” “Metal belts will be sculpted and quite large.” “[Hats should have] wide brims” “[Jewelry should have] an emphasis on bold, modern shapes.” “[For jewelry,] Pieces should be large but not overly bulky.”
  • R - “The effect may be lavish, but the workmanship should be intricate and delicate.” “delicate [shoes]” “[For bags,] Delicate shoulder straps. Elegantly slim briefcases.” “Jewelry should always be delicate and lavish, with intricate and ornate touches. Rounded shapes, curves, swirls, and lots of dangles”
  • C - “slender pumps” “narrow heels” “moderate size [bags]” “slim and elegant” “keep [belts] elegant, slim, and narrow with small smooth buckles” “small and crisp [hats] with even brims” “Small [jewelry]”
  • N - “moderate-sized [bags]” “Jewelry should be kept on the chunky side” “It is possible to get away with very minimal chains, tiny diamond studs, etc., but chances are you won’t be satisfied with this once you experiment with a zippier look!”
  • G - “All accessories should be small, crisp, geometric, and colorful” “Small, crisp geometrics [for bags]” “[Belts] may be narrow to moderately wide.” “Small, crisply tailored hats.” “Jewelry should be small and sharp.”
Shape
  • D - “All accessories should be crisp, sharply tailored, and angular with geometric shapes. Keep everything sleek and contemporary in feeling.” “High, straight heels, crisp soles, and elegantly tapering toes.” “Angular envelopes, clutches, or structured briefcases.” “[For jewelry,] thin sharp pieces are good choices, as are avant-garde works of art.”
  • R - “softly sophisticated.” “[Shoes of] Lightweight and supple leather.” “[For bags,] small, rounded shapes. Soft, supple leather or fabric.” [For belts,] soft and supple leather or fabric.” “Soft, curvy [hats]” “Large, fluffy fur hats.”
  • C - “elegant scarves in symmetrical ties” “tapered toes” “elegant leather” “softly tailored flats” “crisply tailored [bags]” “supple leather [bags]” “tailored, symmetrical shape[d hats]” “Keep your jewelry elegant, smooth, and symmetrical” “Small, slightly geometric shapes [in jewelry] are good, as are smoothly curved swirls.”
  • N - “Unconstructed styles with soft or rounded-edged geometric shapes are most effective.” “high heels should be very angular and straight, not tapered” “unconstructed pouches” “Simple geometrics in supple leather” “softly geometric [belts]” “unconstructed [hats]. Large, loose, and floppy. Shaggy-haired fur.” “Soft or rounded-edged geometrics [for jewelry]”
  • G - “All accessories should be small, crisp, geometric, and colorful” “tailored and angular [shoes] in lightweight leather. Unusual shapes in toes and heels are excellent (asymmetrics, wedges, sharp points, etc.) as are bold colors and printed fabric.” “Small, crisp geometrics [for bags]” “Stiff leather [belts] with geometric buckles.” “Jewelry should be small and sharp and in geometric, asymmetrical, or irregular shapes.”
Detail
  • D - “sleek & elegant”
  • R - “ornate” “strappy, slender-heeled [shoes] with tapered or open toes” “[Flats] with ornamentation” “[For bags,] Ornamentation or luxurious detail (beads, gathers, trim).” “[For belts,] All beaded, bejeweled, or sparkly styles are excellent.” “belts are a focal point, and should be selected as carefully as a fine piece of jewelry” “Jewelry should always be delicate and lavish, with intricate and ornate touches. Rounded shapes, curves, swirls, and lots of dangles
 sparkly materials are essential
 and an antique, baroque, or rococo effect is desirable.”
  • C - “simple, clean, and elegant” “Be careful not to overdo! Go elegant instead of extreme.”
  • N - “Accessories should be kept minimal; plain and simple is your best look here” “evening sandals should be very bare, not strappy” “belts should be simple” “[For jewelry, think] “wearable art”... or it can be bright and funky costume pieces that add pizzazz! Earthy materials are very elegant and sophisticated on you (copper, silver, amber, turquoise, etc.). Hard-finished enamels and glass are fun, especially when used in bold colors for vivid accents”
  • G - “[Accessories] should call attention to themselves as detail” “Contrast is being strived for with your use of accessories, as well as bringing out your wit and a sense of fun.” “[For shoes] bold colors and printed fabric. Flats of all kinds should always be funky and fun (patent leather, trimmed, etc.)” “Brightly colored belts are excellent aids in breaking your line.” “[For jewelry] Brightly colored enamel, stone, or glass are best. Very contemporary avant-garde pieces are excellent on you, as are trendy pieces that accentuate your wit.”
Some random observations from me about this category
  • In keeping with the general themes, D fam again shines more with much bolder or larger scale accessories than everyone else, although they don't need a ton of detail within them. The overall shape seems to do most of the heavy lifting.
  • In contrast, G fam and R fam once again call for a lot of detail within their accessories. They also get the most fun-sounding shoes (to me, a magpie).
  • And again N, C, and D have the cleaner strategies for accessories, although N does have a more G-like approach recommended for fun colorful jewelry.

7. In closing, some keywords

Picked out from the sections for each main family. I find these helpful to kind of paint a word picture of the overall vibe each family is recommended to go for.
  • D - sharp, geometric, elongated, sculpted, sleek, streamlined, defined, structured, clean, bold, sweeping, angular, tailored, elegant, long, straight, contemporary, avant-garde, crisp, modern, chiseled, high-contrast
  • R - soft, rounded, ornate, intricate, flowing, draping, light, shiny, plush, sheer, delicate, curved, tapered, sparkle, gathers, folds, blended, luxurious, fluid, antique, shirred, flounces, frills, fluffy, swirls, watercolor, rich, abstract, sophisticated, strappy, ornamentation, beaded, bejeweled, lavish, rococo, elaborate, colorful, glitzy
  • C - smooth, even, blended, controlled, softly tailored, slightly flowing, clean, elegant, luscious, understated, quality, moderate, simple, minimal, crisp, symmetrical, gathers, slim, beaded, sleek, natural
  • N - geometric, soft, rounded edges, irregular, asymmetric, relaxed, straight, softly tailored, unconstructed, narrow, slim, loose, easy, textured, plush, matte, minimal, plain, simple, open, casual, chic, separates, mix and match, pattern, color, sophisticated, easy, elongated, short, zip, verve, pizzazz, bold, bright, pastel, vivid, wild, imaginative, funky, blended, chunky, elegant, tousled, free, fresh-faced, glowing, radiant, healthy
  • G - small, sharp, geometric, fitted, crisp, tailored, straight, staccato, severe, animated, broken, short, detail, defined, flat, light, matte, sheen, moderate, call attention, colorful, trim, outlined, piping, ribbing, contrast, pleats, angular, ties, lapels, narrow, well-coordinated separates, tapered, stiff, slim, asymmetrical, bold, sassy, splashes, bright, high contrast, wild, chic, contemporary, humorous, wit, fun, angular, unusual shapes, prints, irregular, avant-garde, sleek, beading, tousled, cropped, fresh-faced, glowing, doe-eyed
Phew! You made it to the end. Hopefully it was helpful, or gave you some ideas of smaller, more approachable categories to explore for HTTs. If not, at least it was a great exercise for my own weird brain processing lol. Feel free to drop any observations/thoughts you might have in the comments, I'm curious what everyone else sees or thinks is notable or interesting!
submitted by oftenfrequently to Kibbe [link] [comments]


2024.05.13 22:45 Open_Cap_652 Quick Review of Recent Sezane Purchases! (Clyde Trench, Paula Babies, Octobre Editions Riddle Jacket)

Hi everyone!
Longtime lurker, first time caller :) Just wanted to share some opinions on recent Sezane purchases in terms of fit, quality, etc. Hope it's helpful for anyone thinking about these purchases!
For reference, I'm 5'5", 135-140 lbs (depending on my menstrual cycle), athletic build but also quite curvy (broad shoulders and lats from years of rock climbing, wide hips, smaller waist). Measurements are roughly 37 inch bust - 28 inch waist. My complexion is dark (olive-tan skin, black hair, brown eyes).
Clyde Trench in Camel
I ordered a size 4 as I range anywhere from a size 2-size 6 in Sezane tops just depending on how I want something to fit.
Riddle Jacket in Pied de Poule (Houndstooth) Khaki
I love Octobre Editions and I'm obsessed with how Sezane does a lot of their Instagram reel styling with women wearing men's jackets and knit tops. I watched a reel where their social media ambassador Lise (Lisa?) tried on the Riddle Jacket and commented on being a European size 52 (US Size 42) (which seemed large but what do I know?) so based my sizing off of that.
Paula Babies (in Polished Camel and Patent Khaki)
I have a quite flat, wide foot (very little arch) and I typically wear a size 7.5-8 Womens US. I've heard a lot of rumblings on this subreddit to size up in Sezane shoes, so I got both a size 8 (Camel) and size 9 (Patent Khaki).
Hope this experience helps anyone making a decision! Happy to answer more questions and post pictures of shoes (but probably not the jackets, as I've already re-packed them).
submitted by Open_Cap_652 to Sezane [link] [comments]


2024.05.13 22:32 SeaInterview7628 Crocheting is hard

Crocheting is hard
I’ve been redoing this baby cardigan for weeks now and I feel so bad about not having it done.
Does anyone have motivation tips?
submitted by SeaInterview7628 to crochet [link] [comments]


2024.05.13 21:27 Valioreah First time wearing my hand knitted cardigan and first time posting đŸ‘‹đŸ» hello!

First time wearing my hand knitted cardigan and first time posting đŸ‘‹đŸ» hello! submitted by Valioreah to PlusSizeFashion [link] [comments]


2024.05.13 21:18 Nolifeking00 Center Week Cinema for May 15th, 2024: Mutant Mayhem

The Mutants have taken too much and will not take any more. Normies run for you lives as the freaks attacks.
(All Links Here)

The carnage starts at 8:00 PM CDT in the Prerec Twitch Chat.

The Brood [1979* (1:32:29)*] A man tries to uncover an unconventional psychologist's therapy techniques on his institutionalized wife, amidst a series of brutal murders.

Kindred [1987* (1:33:07)*] A geneticist takes his assistants to his old family home to locate the deadly product of his late mother's revolutionary research into rapid human evolution--his monstrous, tentacled baby brother--before a mad scientist gets to him first.

Basket Case 3: The Progeny [1991 (1:29:43)] Duane recovers from his delusional breakdown to find his freakish basket-bound brother Belial will soon become a father. But not everything is joyous as the once tight knit brothers no longer seem to trust each other.
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2024.05.13 20:21 Similar_Zebra4973 My sister's behavior is getting worse and worse. What should I do?

Context: Me and my family are Muslim, which plays a huge role in this post (Islamophobic responses not appreciated nor needed)
My sister(17F) is the baby of the family and has been treated pretty well since she was a child. We already noticed that she was a bit different when she was younger, she cried every day until she was around 14 and was pretty confrontational. Every few day an argument would spark up and sometimes(but very rarely) it would get physical. It was excused as a quirk she just had(since I was also a bit of a rowdy child who argued a LOT) but it was only these past few years that her behavior began to get worse. She started become more argumentative, cursing a lot, and began to treat me and my siblings(all 20+) condescendingly and talks down to us.
She began to leave home to visit her friends in the neighborhood or go out with her friends, which was allowed as long as she alerted my mom to where she was going. However, when my mom didn't want her to go to an event with her friends, she contested the refusal which led to a huge argument. A few days later, she snuck out and worried everyone in the house. I had to call all her friends to ask where she went. When she eventually came home, wayyy after the sun had set, she was angry that we questioned her on where she was and why she left. Another argument happened and she ended up upset that we told her that her behavior wasn't appropriate for a Muslim girl. This was the first of three times she snuck out without permission and they all ended the same, her believing she was a victim and wasn't at fault at all.
More recently, like I mentioned earlier, her behavior towards me and my older siblings is completely out of line. Sometimes she treats us as if she expects us to wait hand and foot for her, ordering us around and making snide comments about us. I caught her wearing my clothes without permission 10 TIMES, all of which I asked to to tell me first. She didn't. I had to resort to storing my clothes in my older siblings room, which is usually inaccessible to her, to prevent her from wearing them any longer. Ive also caught her stealing my snacks before, though i just let it lie. Arguing with her is extremely tiring and just make the mood of the house go down. She also uses brushes and products that my siblings bought with their own money without telling them, and sometimes finishing it from them all together. We all know it was her because she is the only one interested in styling her hair. Its also one of the reasons we(me, her, and some neighborhood friends) are late to school almost every day. I should have suspected something was going on at that point because I had already caught her with her head covering half off or showing her neck/chest.
She is especially interested in asking which of the siblings are the most attractive. She even asked our parents that question multiple times. She begins arguments that blow out of control over the smallest of things. A couple months ago, she was upset that I was using the family TV to watch a show and tried to order me to get off so she could watch herself. When I pointed out that she could use her chromebook or phone, she replied that she didn't want to. She only wanted to use the TV. I also had my own devices I could have used, and would have if she was watching something with another one of my siblings, but her command didn't agree with me. Even so, I was willing to let it go so I told her that I would finish the rest of my episode(20 minutes) then hand it over. As you probably guessed, if turned into argument because she wanted to use it at that exact moment. My oldest sibling had to interfere because she was just about screaming the whole house down. It wasn't a one time thing either. I rarely use the family TV since I have my own devices and almost ever other time I use it, she suddenly has a problem with me doing so. Whenever I point out that she can watch on anything other than the family TV, she always doesn't "want" to, even when I'm trying to watch with another sibling.
There is this one specific incident that sticks out to me where she crossed my boundaries. While I can't remember what the actual argument was about, I remember the result. I'm not good at arguing at all, nor am I comfortable doing so despite how many I get into. My older sibling asked her to talk through the issue with me with I was happy to do, but remember, I'm not good with words. I asked her to talk through text instead so we could cool our heads and sort through our thoughts. She protested at first before agreeing. While I was typing out my grevienxes and trying to fix the problem, she plopped a chair in front of me and tried to talk it out with words instead. I left obviously and was extremely upset that she crossed my boundaries like that. It may seem minor but I couldn't help but notice that she regularly crossed my family's boundaries after that incident.
One of her most extreme changes was the way she dressed. She began to favor more tight dresses and occasionally pants(my family is not in the school of thought that allows wearing pants only). Since I go to the same school as her, I witnessed firsthand how she would go out of her way to hide the fact that she wore pants only from my mom, from wearing a skirt to school just to take it off later or covering it with a long cardigan. She knew for a fact that my mom would be upset and tried to hide it. When she was eventually busted, a long argument following it, she promised not to do it again. She tried to be more sneaky about it, especially around me, but I eventually caught her once again. Me and my siblings resorted to hiding the pants for a while but eventually had to return them.
At this point, we had multiple interventions just for her behavior. She even had behavioral therapy scheduled even if she protested going sometimes. I'm not sure if she is still going to this day. It's no surprise that she had some oddities with her behavior since my whole family is on the spectrum, but everyone else calmed down with age. She just takes it to new heights.
The final straw was when me and my siblings found her on social media when she left without permission, again. She blocked us and anyone that followed us from all her social media accounts, which should have been suspect. Turns out, she was wearing tight, figure revealing clothing, showing her hair, and her neck and chest were on full display. Almost all of the videos were her lip syncing to music with makeup on. One that especially shocked us was a suggestive video she posted. Note that her accounts are NOT private, so anyone could see this. She knows that doing all that she was doing is haram given that she tried her hardest make sure we didn't find out.
Me and my siblings are planning to contront her about the social media posts she made next week, but I'm not sure how effective it will be. We already made plans to make some of her behavior harder for her to do again by inconvenienting her whenever she does it, but I know it will end up in her blowing up over it. I was warned specifically to not engage with her because she likes picking problems/taking her frustrations out on me the most because I am the closest to her age.
As you noticed throughout this post, if you confront her directly about her actions she'll take it as an argument, so is there any way to subtly influence her behavior without her noticing? Or just anything to help guide her onto the right path?
Tldr: My sister is consistantly misbehaving and its just getting worse the longer its left alone. I need help or just any advice with how to help her stop misbehaving. Any suggestions would be appreciated.
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2024.05.13 18:49 Krobybaby Update: Took everyone’s advice and revamped my wardrobe for Budapest, Prague, and Berlin!

Update: Took everyone’s advice and revamped my wardrobe for Budapest, Prague, and Berlin!
Previous post here.
Huge thank you to everyone who provided advice for my vacation and work conference/retreat coming up at the end of this month. The resounding message was that I was going to freeze my a** off.
I tried my best to shop out of my closet and prioritize buying new items that I absolutely did not have. I live in a super warm climate and hadn’t updated my colder weather clothes in a while.
Here is my amended list of wardrobe items:
Outerwear - Lululemon rain jacket (my ride or die) - Uniqlo knitted short jacket (might wear on plane) - Old navy cardigan
Bottoms - A&F tan sloane trousers - H&M green polyester pants - Black ripskirt
Tops - Old Navy white button down (I can tie this over like, everything) - Zara tan tee - Uniqlo black tank - Aritzia white bodysuit
Other items - Green floral dress (brand unknown) - Old Navy black linen jumpsuit
Shoes - VEJA Venturi sneakers (wear on plane) - Birkenstock Glendas
Accessories - Uniqlo round knitted crochet bag - Saint Laurent sunglasses
Not Pictured - Lululemon travel pants (wear on plane) - Lightweight pajama tank top/short set - Gold earrings - Compression socks (wear on plane) - Swimsuit (buying abroad)
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2024.05.13 18:43 LittleCricket_ My first Mother’s Day was great!

My husband works weekends so we did stuff on Friday. I told him I wanted a thoughtful surprise and a day on the couch playing Stardew Valley and knitting. He woke up with baby; they snuck out and came back with breakfast! Then I was escorted to the couch where I was handed my Switch Lite and project bag. I only emerged to put baby down to nap (which I like doing) and to make dinner (which I wanted to do). He got me a “mama” tshirt, teen titans on Blu-ray and an electric yarn winder! The yarn winder was broken upon arrival and he was very embarrassed but we can exchange it!
Yesterday (Sunday) baby slept through the night so we were able to go to church. Everyone was excited to see us! Our church tradition is to give pink carnations to all the women— not just moms. I haven’t been to church since I was a teenager so it was my first time getting one! My aunt and uncle surprised us in the parking lot after church. They got me a beautiful necklace made from a corelle dish in the pattern I grew up with “spring blossom”. Then we saw my nana and gave her a present. A stained glass suncatcher with a cardinal and humming bird. After that we went home just in time for a nap! After nap we had some girl time until it was time to make dinner which was a soft taco bake thing that was ridiculously unhealthy! 😎
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2024.05.13 18:04 howdoichangethisok Timeline of Taylor's Relationships with JA and Matty Through her Songs

After listening to TTPD, I really wanted to put the songs in chronological order, and then I got a little carried away and added in other albums to fit the theme of her relationship with Joe to Matty. This is exhaustive, so pardon my indulgence, though I’m sure that there could be even more to add or edit! Keep in mind that these songs are also not in order of album release, but it’s my thoughts on chronology and how her music reflected the timeline. Some of the songs might’ve been written before they were released, as well.
So, here's my draft/attempt at a chronological playlist:
  1. The Mastermind - this is the first song in the timeline to me. It gives the history of how she and Joe met, even if it’s a kind of hindsight view.
  2. London Boy - Obviously about Joe, reads as a “first sight” kind of song – very superficial, describes Joe. Something cutesy that a high school girl would write about her crush.
  3. Delicate - This song is her reflection on her current state of mind, kind of a warning to Joe or an admission to him of what state she’s in. She’s asking him to help her through it, but her heart is delicate, the situation is delicate.
  4. Call it What you Want - This is the response to Delicate and how Joe accepted her and supported her through the whole Kanye/Kim fiasco and her perception of her reputation/state of being.
  5. Don’t Blame Me - Girl was getting it Good from JA. References to JA being her "drug."
  6. Dress - Hot/Heavy early stages of the relationship. Still getting it good. This is like the peak of their relationship
or as some could say
the climax? Sorry.
  7. Lover - Sweet love song/ballad for JA. Feels more settled and ready to commit to something solid.
  8. Paper Rings - Happy upbeat love song for JA, thinking marriage?
  9. Miss Americana and the Heartbreak Prince - After the new glow of the relationship, she really starts showing some anxiety about their relationship. Seemed hot and heavy and all loved-up in the beginning. Was this song a warning?
  10. Cornelia Street - The anxiety of the JA relationship, another connection to London as his metaphor.
  11. The Great War - It’s been speculated that they were off/on more than we know. Seems it got a little tumultuous.
  12. New Year’s Day - Always read to me as a “make up song.” Feels sad, and also expressing that no matter what happens, she wants to be there for him/vice versa.
  13. Lavender Haze - This one always read to me as TS gaslighting herself into not wanting to be married, and forcing herself to stay in a Lavender Haze. She wanted the relationship to be more than it was; she was living in a daydream or haze. A little drug reference here, I think, too -- she has drugged herself or wanted to be in that haze.
  14. Tolerate It - I think this song expresses how she felt about her life being this big glamorous famous thing, and Joe wrote it all off or dismissed it.
  15. Cardigan - She writes in TTPD about kind of feeling discarded or dismissed. I think Cardigan reflects that, too.
  16. You’re Losing Me - Written as a warning toward the end of the relationship.
  17. Guilty as Sin - Mentally moving on, grasping onto someone else or the fantasy of it as her relationship dies. She’s built up Matty as a thing that could save her – she’s moving on mentally and ready to jump, but only because she thinks there’s someone waiting for her to do so.
  18. Say Don’t Go - Relationship is dying, giving it one last shot.
  19. The 1 - Sad regrets at the end.
  20. So Long London - Saying goodbye officially to “London,” lots of repeated places from London Boy and Cornelia Street.
  21. The Black Dog - Mourning the end of the relationship, watching him move on.
  22. Bejeweled - We saw her kind of swing into super fun happy “going to live it up” after being closed off – this was her revisiting her life without JA holding her back.
  23. Fresh Out the Slammer - Running to the guy she fantasized about in “Guilty as Sin?”
  24. The Tortured Poet’s Department - Her relationship with Matty.
  25. But Daddy I Love Him - Reaction to fans and naysayers about her relationship – she was all in.
  26. I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can) - the “maybe I can’t” at the end is her realizing that he isn’t living up to her fantasy of him.
  27. My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys / The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived / Fortnight- These talk about the end of that relationship and how she felt discarded after the whirlwind of her tryst with Matty. Fortnight alludes to a move-on drug.
  28. Down Bad - What happened after he left and her experience of being love-bombed.
  29. Loml - I think this is her finally coming to terms with her real “should’ve been” JA relationship, and she’s also mourning the loss of Matty and the fantasy she built around him.
  30. Smallest man Who Ever Lived / Imgonnagetyouback - Dichotomy of how she felt about Matty after their relationship.
  31. How Did It End? - Her expressing a lot of anxiety about how people view her relationship. After something ends, it’s easy to feel embarrassed or ashamed that other people are just going to view you as a failure.
  32. Florida!!! - Daydreaming about escaping and running away from your problems / people's judement -- waiting out the "sh!tstorm," letting your past die in the swamp, move on and become someone new. Looking to use "florida" as a drug to move on / get over it / bandaid.
  33. I Can Do it With a Broken Heart - Still had to perform amidst all of this!
  34. The Alchemy - Accepting her experience (maybe even becoming that someone new from "Florida!!!"). I think this song is more about her performing and a loveletter to her fans – she’s back, baby. Maybe there are some Travis references in there, but I think this is her reclaiming herself and picking up the pieces. This time, her drug is being the "heroine."
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2024.05.13 17:49 PhasmoWho NPCs Question and Discussion

I'm still a baby in the spirtual since but I feel like I've grown a lot and have helped people close to me grow as well as they've helped me grow.
I try to believe every person on this planet has a soul but my lover and her mother, for context my lover and I believe/know that we are mean't to be together. As for my soon to be MIL she believed her twin flame wasn't with her in this life and that she was going to be living the rest of her life alone, we told her the right person will come and you will know it as it will feel seamless.
This lead us to talk about how it seems some people may seem to be conscious from what you discuss but always are parallel as you speak, by this I mean it seems they'll adapt to what you say to seem they're on your level but don't really ever connect.
I think a lot of the times humans don't trust their gut and we try to use our judgement from our previous experiences or what a person had told us about them to decide what they should do in a situation. We did a test for someone my MIL was dating we didn't know them well and my Fiancee and I's gut feeling was the same that it seemed like this person was on guard and used 'sarcasm' as a way to safely tread conversation to find out what my MIL agrees and disagrees on in different conversations.
Long story short we felt there was nothing behind this person's eyes, aside from a void, and they were just adapting to her ideals because they wanted to be with her. Afterwards she confronted him because she felt the same and he began to dismiss, gaslight, and victimize.
I try not to dig too deep into a matrix concept but rather that the Earth is in a Yin-Yang of a battle of good and evil. Are some people sent here/designed/coded to be evil do-ers? Do they know? Are these just lost souls who've sold themselves to the man's idea and haven't spiritually grown? Are you able to see whether or not someone has a soul while Astral Projecting? Open minded to hear your opinions!
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2024.05.13 17:46 Various_Performance9 Enumclaw "Do it for the music tour" with Graham Hunt

Enumclaw submitted by Various_Performance9 to tourposters [link] [comments]


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