Snorting oxycodone advice

Hello
25F, 130lbs, 5’10”, no tobacco, MMJ user, hydrocodone and oxyxodone as needed, cyclobenzaprine, protonix
If you read this thank you so much because I’m absolutely desperate and my doctors are tired of me and I think they think I only want pain meds. I don’t, I just want to feel better. I have a huge stash of emergency oxycodone anyway so I barely even need them for that.
On 12/15 I fell down the stairs and hit the lower of my middle back quite hard. 12/19 I had a LEEP done, 01/06 I came down with extreme urinary issues and between then and now have been back 6 times, seen 4 specialists and have seen my PCP at least ten times for urine samples. I’ve also only been able to attend my full time job for 43 days so far this year and have no more money for copays and if it weren’t for my ADA paperwork, I’d have been fired a long time ago
Over the last two weeks, it’s been taking me up to two hours to produce urine while having a full (and very sore - mostly left side) bladder. This is infuriating. When I do end up finally feeling the need to release, I have less than 3 minutes to get to a restroom before my vision starts going spotty from the bladder pressure pain.
My urologist ordered a cystoscopy, but has been blaming my 3mm kidney stone until I begged for an ultrasound last month of my bladder. Found bladder wall thickening and bladder cyst / possible urachal remnant.
I found out what Cuada equina is today. I learned that it is very very commonly missed. I can barely walk, and at the music festival I went to over the weekend I had to use ADA for just about everything. I look completely normal so I got judged pretty hard, but I do have paperwork. I have been losing weight without much diet change and my back has been killing me as well. I feel so weak. My urine flow is so small compared to what it used to be. I had a period of time where the pain was so bad, I couldn’t feel my clitoris or labia at all so sex was pointless as well, and I thought I’d lose my relationship and be alone forever. They send me to an OB-Oncologist who said not to come back, which is why my urologist finally agreed to check my bladder.
Is it possible that all my issues are related to the cyst and thickening, or could this be cuada equina that was missed on multiple CT’s? I can’t find info on bladder cysts. using retention. When is the appropriate time to go to the hospital? I can barely walk without pain meds. I urinated about 40 times on Saturday, with my usual being 10-20 times, and some days there’s very little pain or urgency at all, but the retention is almost always there to some extent.
It almost feels like the part of my brain that controls my bladder doesn’t work anymore because no matter how hard I tell my bladder to release, it just doesn’t happen sometimes and I can’t get comfortable after that. I’ve slept a total of 4 hours since Saturday morning and I only have one hydrocodone left. Pyridium does NOTHING except for when burning pain presents, and I can’t take NSAIDS until my GI clears me due to extreme gas, constipation and bloating / belching thought to be caused by peptic ulcers. I can’t walk at this point without pain meds, but the ER always releases me with the same DX of cyst and bladder wall thickening and tells me they have no clue what that means. But I’m in so much pain I feel like there has to be something they can do other than give me fluids and monitor me for an hour or two until I can get to my cystoscopy next week.
If you have any advice for me I really appreciate it. I don’t want to die but I feel the only way out of lifelong urinary pain after 6 months now is suicide. The only time suicide doesn’t cross my mind a couple times is when I do end up having to take a pain pill. In March, I had to take oxy every day. I only take them now when I can’t walk because the effects are too strong for me to keep my life in order while taking them every day. But this weekend I have had the most trouble walking, and using the restroom, since all of these issues began.
I can’t afford any more specialists visits after my procedure, so I really wish the ER could do something for me as they’re the only ones who won’t turn me away for not having money at this point. My GI doc actually canceled my appointment because I don’t have $20 and I’ve been putting off another ultrasound because it’s $200 up front. IDK what to do but I’m pretty sure this is how a lot of people end up on fent and heroin - if I had been denied pain meds this far I would have turned to the streets, and that’s coming from someone who has chosen - on their own - to quit most drug related and extracurricular activities to better their life at a young age and is much happier for it.
I can’t even get the ER to catheterize me when I can’t urinate for 6+ hours at a time. What gives? Why won’t they run a different imaging test? They wouldn’t even give me a breath test for h pylori recently and now I’m waiting a month for an appointment I can’t even afford.
TL;DR extreme bladder pain, nobody understands why, extreme difficulty urinating, ER can’t do anything for me and awaiting surgery. Is there anything I can say or do to get proper medical attention or can the ER really not touch your bladder like they say? Is there a way I can convince them to admit me so I could see a urologist before my procedure? My urologist is unavailable until my follow-up and I don’t think the company they work for allows them to Rx narcotics and I’m against taking more than 1 oxycodone a week at this point but so far have been unsuccessful in getting something weaker like hydro or tramadol.

ive been an addict for about 10 years, maybe longer. i've been addicted to xanax, fentanyl, percocet, oxycontin, lsd, heroin, and meth. the worst of my addiction i think has been fentanyl and xanax. i've been through rehab, and do i usually do good for a while when im out, but the second im offered something i give in and i immediately spiral. i've been at the point where i was taking at least 40+ xanax a day and snorting at least 4 grams (maybe more) of fentanyl a day. i'm 21 years old and don't want to throw my entire life away because of drugs. i want to be clean so bad. any advice will help

Mrs Appleton was a vision.
I heard my father say that once. Mum thumped his arm, branding him with a territorial stamp of disapproval. And then she surveyed our lounging neighbour with a squint, sealing her lips into a thin, firm line. I was only eleven years old, but I could tell that my mum agreed with my dad. That was why she reacted so ferociously. I hadn’t experienced much of the world, but even I understood that Mrs Appleton was unusually alluring.
“I wouldn’t risk wetting your hose over there,” Mum said, rolling her eyes. “Not if you want to keep it.”
My father snorted, and I stared blankly. I had no idea what my mother meant.
“I don’t think she’d look twice at me,” Dad chuckled.
“Oh, so you’re settling for me? Someone more attainable?” Mum asked.
My father awkwardly searched for a ladder out ofaself-dug hole.
“I, er, meant that she’s… too young,” He coughed.
“Right. Well, she’s an exhibitionist,” My mum scowled. “I mean… Look at the time! It’s nine o’clock in the evening. Our children are about to go to bed. Meanwhile, she’s posing on her front lawn in a skimpy swimsuit. Showcasing herself like a spring sale at H&M.”
“She must be getting cold out there,” Dad said.
“Aw, do you think so? Go and warm her up, sweetie,” My mum pouted, leaving the room.
Dad sighed, turning his attention to me with a despairing grin. He placed a hand on my shoulder and patted it lightly.
“Be wiser with your mouth than me, son,” He said. “That’s the only piece of advice this moron has to give.”
It was a piece of advice that would save me from a horror I still don’t understand.
I remember the first time Mrs Appleton saw me. Saw me seeing her. I was peeping out of my bedroom window. Must’ve been around midnight. I told myself that I was simply curious about how long my neighbour would stay on her front lawn. But the truth was that I simply felt unable to peel my eyes away. I’d never felt such a bewildering mixture of lust and fear.
The latter emotion only strengthened when the spectacular woman looked up at me and smiled.
It was not a slow, measured motion. It was a snap of unnatural speed. A movement that led my neighbour’s eyes to lock onto mine with such precision that I knew she’d been aware of my gaze for a long time. She smiled, begging me to do something. Pleading with her eyes. I internally shrieked, drew the curtains, and leapt into bed.
In spite of that awful moment, I didn't understand my mother’s resentment towards the new neighbour. At the time, I didn’t mind Mrs Appleton.
That's too non-committal. I loved her — loved how popular she made me. When my best pal, Jason, noticed Mrs Appleton on her front lawn during a sleepover, word soon spread around school. I had friends before the young woman moved to our street, but I certainly gained friends.
Before long, hormonal boys made pilgrimages to my house. They were desperate to see the half-nude woman on the street, and I was desperate for an elevated social status. When their parents arrived to pick them up, however, the sun would still be hanging in the sky, and Mrs Appleton would not have emerged. My new friends would begrudgingly go home, and I’d feel my credibility slipping away.
So, after relentless pestering, I agreed to let a couple of boys join Jason and me at one of our monthly sleepovers.
“This has been a revolving door of visitors recently,” My mum frowned, standing in the doorway to my bedroom with suspicious hands on her hips.
My older sister, Gemma grinned over her shoulder. “What do you think, Mum? Do you reckon Dean has suddenly become super popular?”
I narrowed my eyes at Gemma, willing her not to tell our mother why so many boys were so interested in spending the night at our house. When Mum disappeared to make dinner, I let my sister have it.
“Stop being such a donkey,” I growled.
“Don’t you kids know about porn?” Gemma snorted. “How embarrassing. Enjoy your evening of creeping, losers.”
My sister ducked, dodging an airborne plushie I launched at her head, and she muttered something about counting the days until university. We all breathed a sigh of relief when she shut the door behind her.
“Y’know, Dean… Your sister’s pretty hot too,” Bowen said.
“Don’t be gross, man,” I replied. “We’re here for the sexy night lady.”
“Night lady? I think my dad likes those. That’s why Mum and him aren’t together anymore, apparently,” Isaac said.
“I’ve never seen a girl do this!” Bowen gasped, pressing a pair of binoculars against the window pane. “She’s just come outside, guys!”
“You brought binoculars?” I asked.
“I’m sorry, bro,” Jason apologised on Bowen’s behalf. “I shouldn’t have told ‘em.”
I shrugged. “S’all right. I get it. She’s fit.”
“She’s really fit,” Bowen qualified. “But what is she… doing?”
Isaac squinted out of the window. “Yeah, this is kind of weird. I didn’t really think about it when Jason told us.”
“Think about what?” I asked.
Bowen laughed. “Why she’s sunbathing at night.”
“She’s moonbathing,” I replied.
That elicited a round of laughter, and my mind bathed in a sudden surge of dopamine. A sensory overload of hormones is a dangerous state for a pre-teen. The sort of imbalance which unearths dumb, dangerous ideas.
“Why don’t we go over?” I suggested.
Jason raised an eyebrow. “What?”
“Yes, Dean! Knew you were cool!” Bowen laughed. “What an idea.”
“Sounds kind of silly, mate,” Jason frowned. “Your mum and dad will see us.”
“No, they won’t, you baby!” Bowen scoffed. “Y’never crept out of your house before?”
“I just think Dean and I won’t be allowed to do sleepovers anymore,” Jason sulked.
I smiled at him. “We won’t get caught, man. Promise.”
I’d never done anything so mischievous before, but I believed that our mission would succeed. My parents were creatures of habit. They both went to bed at eleven o’clock, and my dad’s snoring betrayed them ten minutes later. We assumed they were asleep. There was a slight chance, I suppose, that my mother might’ve still been awake.
After all of these years, I wish she had been. She would’ve stopped us.
After tiptoeing downstairs, we slipped into the back garden. The front door would’ve been too creaky, and the back door stood at the other end of the house — farther from my parents’ upstairs bedroom than the main door, so less chance of being heard.
The night felt light. It felt too light, as if we might float away. It lacked any temperature, and it hung in stasis. There was not a breeze to be felt, but somehow the air did not cling to my skin. And the moon above, a perfect crescent, shone dimly in the clear sky. That was odd, given it was not concealed by clouds.
“We’re not actually gonna talk to Mrs Appleton, are we?” Jason asked.
“Course not, dimwit!” Bowen laughed. “We don’t want her to tell. We’ll just spy on her.”
“Don’t be mean, Bowen,” I snapped as we skulked around the side of my home.
The boy rolled his eyes in response, but said nothing as we trudged onwards.
“I hope she still looks hot when we get closer,” Isaac whispered.
I inched the garden gate open, wincing as it uttered a meek groan. It was too quiet for my parents to hear, but I suddenly realised we had to think about other neighbours who might spot us. There were so many variables I hadn’t considered. Some variables are so terrible that I wouldn’t have ever considered them.
The four of us formed a line behind the tall hedge at the edge of my parents’ property, and then we peeked over the top. I would’ve used my head if I were a little older, a little wiser, and a little less besotted. I would’ve recalled the horror I felt when Mrs Appleton had spotted me a couple of months earlier. The inexplicable dread of her eyes upon my face.
However, like my friends, I simply gawped at the captivating neighbour. The blonde beauty on a folding, metal sun lounger. Donning a blue, floral, two-piece swimsuit and limply splaying her arms outwards, draping them over the edges of the lounger like loose garments.
“Did you see that?” Jason suddenly croaked.
Momentarily pulling myself out of Mrs Appleton’s hypnotic aura, I looked at my frightened friend.
“See what?” I asked.
But then I froze, mind catching up to my eyes. I was processing events in a delayed manner, backlogged by the flurry of perplexing and exhilarating thoughts filling my pre-adolescent brain.
Mrs Appleton was glowing.
Not in the figurative sense. Her flesh pulsated with a shimmering glow, as though her entire body were coated in layers of cooking oil — or a cloudy sheet of plastic wrap.
“She’s amazing…” Isaac whispered.
“Definitely hotter than Jennifer Aniston,” Bowen added.
“Are you two not seeing what Jason means?” I whispered fearfully.
“I’m seeing a sexy night lady, Dean,” Bowen giggled. “You’re so cool for telling us about this.”
I started to suggest something reasonable. “I think we should–”
Crackles interrupted me, and terror followed.
As streams of silvery mist rose from Mrs Appleton’s bare flesh, Isaac and Bowen finally fell silent. Finally wore the same whitened looks as Jason and me. But perhaps we would've been able to explain that. Perhaps, if the evening had ended there, I would’ve healed. Years down the line, I would’ve recounted that day and laughed at my childish imagination.
I’ve never been able to deny what happened next.
The woman, basking in the moonlight that drew something horrid from her skin, began to open her mouth. And once it started opening, it didn’t stop in a hurry. Her jaw dropped lower and lower, extending her black gullet far beyond the foot of her chin. A void engulfing the glow of white light from the sky above.
Isaac whimpered, and everything else happened in a couple of seconds.
Mrs Appleton’s eyes shot sharply in his direction, and the boy released a wheeze. An understanding wheeze. And when we cast our eyes in his direction, a unified line of terrified faces, our friend had vanished. Slipped out of reality entirely. With one near-silent utterance, Isaac had simply ceased to exist.
And then we cast our eyes back to my neighbour’s front lawn.
Mrs Appleton’s mouth had returned to normal. Her skin had lost its shimmer. And she was not smiling. In that moment, my lust for the woman vanished. All of the excitement and passion fled my body. In its place, only coldness remained. Only the realisation that Mrs Appleton, unnaturally beautiful, had always simply been unnatural. And I was very glad that I listened to my father. I knew when to keep my mouth closed.
Worst of all, the neighbour was staring at us. Simply standing and staring, with a sullen expression, at the three remaining boys. Three haunted boys.
We backed slowly towards my garden gate, and Mrs Appleton soundlessly watched as we did. Then, we crept back to bed, and I took one final look out of the window.
The woman was still on her front lawn. Standing and watching. Looking up at me as I closed the curtains. Her gaze refused to falter, and I rapidly drew the drapes. But that did nothing to still my mind. I knew that she was still watching.
And I believe that she could still see us.
Jason, Bowen, and I sleeplessly shivered until my mother came into the room eight hours later.
“Pulled an all-nighter, eh?” She chuckled. “You all look tired, and it serves you right. Silly boys. I’m always telling you, Dean… I… Wait, where’s Isaac?”
We never knew how to explain what happened. After all, we didn’t understand it. Still don't.
The three of us told people that we woke up to find that Isaac's sleeping bag was empty. That was it. That was all we knew.
Isaac’s father relentlessly hounded my parents for many weeks. Accused me of being a liar. I didn’t have the stomach to face him because he was right. I was lying. But he wouldn’t have believed the truth. I didn't believe it.
You might expect that Mrs Appleton would’ve moved away shortly afterwards, but she didn’t. Admittedly, fleeing might have made her a suspect in the disappearance of Isaac Longton. But that isn’t why she stayed. She isn’t a human with rational thoughts like you or me. She stayed because she knew that I knew something.
If I were to open my mouth, audibly acknowledging her true nature, then I would make the same mistake as Isaac.
And I would also disappear.

Well, it’s been a while, hasn’t it? After finishing Descendants, I took an unscheduled break. I had an idea for a new story all lined up, in fact, I even started it over on my Patreon page… only to have it crash and burn by the 3rd chapter. So I started scrambling, coming up with something else on the fly, only to watch it go down in flames as well. I started panicking at that point, trying and rejecting other ideas, before I finally settled on this. Fingers crossed. Let's see how this one plays in Peoria. :)
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Chapter 1
December 25, 1944 Bastogne, Belgium
Sgt. Mike Delany huddled inside his jacket and tried not to think about how fucking cold it was. His feet were two ice blocks, he’d lost his gloves three months earlier in Holland, and the way the wind was picking up and the snow was coming down, somehow he doubted warmer weather was on the horizon. Because of that, as he scanned the perimeter from his foxhole, he couldn’t see a damn thing past thirty yards. If the Krauts attacked again, the first he’d know about it would be when some member of the Wehrmacht pointed the business end of their rifle at his head and pulled the trigger.
Merry fuckin’ Christmas, he thought bitterly to himself.
“Sarge, I’m freezing,” Private Johanson whined, earning him a baleful glare. The kid was chattering so hard, Mike thought he’d break a tooth. “Can’t we start a fire?” he begged.
“No fires,” the sergeant growled. “You wanna give away our position?”
“The fucking Krauts have been shelling us for a week,” the private fired back. “I’m pretty sure they already know where we are.”
He angrily bit off a hot retort. The kid was a replacement, green as hell, and was still learning the ropes. As tempting as it was to tear a strip off his hide, that would solve nothing. It might make him feel better for a minute, but the private wouldn’t learn anything, and morale was precarious enough as it was.
“They know where the unit is,” Mike corrected him, “but they don’t know where we are. I’d really like to keep it that way if it’s all the same to you. Besides, we don’t have anything to burn, other than your uniform,” he snorted.
Johanson looked down at his clothing for a moment, as if he were seriously considering that. “No,” Delany snapped, ending the discussion. “If you want to stay warm, keep moving.” Taking his own advice, he started rubbing at his arms and legs, trying to get the blood flowing again… as the sound of a freight train suddenly came roaring from overhead.
“INCOMING!” he shouted, diving for the bottom of their foxhole as the first rounds impacted. Explosions shook the earth all around them, sending up geysers of dirt and debris, while somewhere close, he heard a tree topple and crash into the ground. He could hear shrieks and howls nearby, other members of the platoon dug in nearby, and all too often those same cries were abruptly cut short. Johanson was screaming as well, panicking under the bombardment, when something inside him snapped. Clawing his way out of the foxhole, he bolted out into the enemy barrage, tearing at his clothing and spouting gibberish as he desperately tried to escape the madness.
“Stop! Get back here!” Mike bellowed, but Johanson was deaf to his cries. If he stayed above ground, his life expectancy could be measured with a stopwatch, and for a split second, he was tempted to leave him to his fate. Going after him was suicide, and he hadn’t survived this long by taking stupid chances.
But the kid was his responsibility, and before he had time to second guess his better judgment, he was already up and moving, chasing after the rookie while hell rained down around him. “Goddamn it, stop!” he shouted once again, closing the distance as Johanson ran erratically about, changing directions almost at whim. If he could just tackle him and get him on the ground, they might still live through this.
The private was almost within his grasp when something suddenly grabbed him and yanked hard, ripping him away as the world went black.
The first thing he noticed was it was warm. For the first time in weeks, he wasn’t freezing to death. As he searched his memories, recalling his last moments, Mike recognized that might not be a good sign.
Taking a deep breath, he slowly opened his eyes. A gray and featureless ceiling appeared in his view. He blinked a few times, but it remained unchanged. Lifting his head, he discovered he was lying on an examining table, though of a type he didn’t recognize, and that he was dressed in what looked like a patient’s gown.
Well. Now he knew where he was. Apparently, he’d survived the explosion and was now somewhere behind the lines in a field hospital. Better than he’d feared, truth be told.
But as he leveraged himself up into a sitting position, he realized that didn’t make sense either. The 101^st had been surrounded and cut off for days, unless Patton had finally broken through like the brass had been promising them. That was possible, if he’d been out for a while, but last he’d heard no one was being evacuated.
Which led him to his second realization. If he’d been pulled from the line and sent back to the rear, then he should be in pretty bad shape. Missing limbs, covered in bloody bandages, IVs pumping plasma into his veins… something. At the very least, he should be in excruciating pain, or at least doped to the gills on morphine. Only he felt fine; no pain, and clear-headed. Cautiously, he began examining himself, searching for any signs of injuries, only to come up empty-handed.
“What the fuck is going on?” he said aloud, not expecting a reply.
He received one, nonetheless.
“So… you’re awake,” a man’s voice sounded nearby.
Mike whirled about, but saw nothing. Just a plain gray room, with him sitting on a table. Nothing else was in sight. “Alright, who are you?” he demanded. “Where the hell am I?”
“You are perfectly safe,” the voice assured him. “No one will harm you here.”
A sudden sinking feeling landed in the pit of his stomach. There was one other possible explanation, one he hadn’t allowed himself to consider, not until now. His chin jutted out in defiance as he glared at his unseen captors. “Delany, Michael W. Sergeant. Serial number 39741656. That’s all you’re getting from me, you Nazi bastards.”
A deep sigh came from that same disembodied space. “I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised you leapt to that conclusion,” they answered, “given the circumstances. I assure you, I’m not German. In fact, I’m an American, just like you.”
He considered that for a moment. True, he didn’t hear an accent, but there’d been stories about the Krauts infiltrating the lines with English-speaking commandos, wearing captured uniforms. The fact he wasn’t showing himself, wherever he was, wasn’t helping his case.
“Oh yeah? Then who won the World Series?” Mike demanded.
There was a brief pause. “That would be the nineteen forty-four World Series, I assume?” he asked.
He just stared, incredulous. “Obviously.”
Another pause. “Hmmm… the St. Louis Cardinals, in six games,” the voice said at last.
This was getting stranger by the moment. “Okay, then what was the score of the final game?” He’d caught it on Armed Forces Radio back in Holland, after the Germans had retreated.
“Three runs to one,” the voice answered. “The Cardinals scored all three at the bottom of the fourth inning.” The man almost sounded amused by the question. “Anything else you’d like to ask me?”
Mike just stared. He was right. It hadn’t been much of a series, being honest. Hell, the only reason the Browns even made it that far was because of the war. Most of their players had been 4-F. “If you’re on the up and up, then show yourself,” he said at last.
“I wanted to make certain you were calm and rational first,” he replied, as a hidden door opposite him opened up. A tall, swarthy gentleman entered the room, followed closely by a dark-haired woman, viewing him with obvious suspicion. “I’m Commander Antonio Vargas, US Navy,” he said by introduction, “and this is Amélie Reine. It’s a pleasure to meet you, sergeant.”
He sat up straighter at the word 'Commander'. “Sir,” he said formally, before turning his attention to his companion. He’d spent enough time in France to recognize the origin of her name. “Bonjour, Mademoiselle,” he said with an atrocious accent.
“Bonjour,” she replied, still eyeing him cautiously.
He turned back towards the officer. “Where exactly am I, sir?” he asked. “I appreciate you patching me up and all, but I need to report back to my unit.”
The pair shared a look. “I’m afraid that won’t be possible,” he said.
“Well, you’d better make it possible,” Mike snapped. “You can’t hold me here against my will. There’s a war on, in case you hadn’t heard.”
The commander sighed once more. “I can’t return you to your unit for one very simple reason, Sergeant Delany,” he said evenly.
“Oh? And what’s that?” Mike demanded.
The commander grimaced. “Because you died, sergeant, on Christmas Day, 1944, during the Battle of the Bulge.” Mike stared in shock, but the man wasn’t finished.
“... approximately one hundred and fifty years ago.”
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Synopsis:
Juliette Contzen is a lazy, good-for-nothing princess. Overshadowed by her siblings, she's left with little to do but nap, read … and occasionally cut the falling raindrops with her sword. Spotted one day by an astonished adventurer, he insists on grading Juliette's swordsmanship, then promptly has a mental breakdown at the result.
Soon after, Juliette is given the news that her kingdom is on the brink of bankruptcy. At threat of being married off, the lazy princess vows to do whatever it takes to maintain her current lifestyle, and taking matters into her own hands, escapes in the middle of the night in order to restore her kingdom's finances.
Tags: Comedy, Adventure, Action, Fantasy, Copious Ohohohohos.
Chapter 238: Fragments Of Memories
Willem of Hagel never thought much of the world.
He didn’t have time to. As a boy out in the fields, his thoughts were as tied as his hands. Any moment spent thinking about the horizon could be better spent readying the soil for the next harvest.
There were others who thought differently, of course.
But there were also others who’d never received a smack on their head for their curiosity.
There was room enough for heroes without needing to cross the oceans, he was always told, often while nursing his ear. They were the farmers, just like them. Those who kept the miller baking his bread and the horses eating their grain.
Willem never had a mind to disagree.
The smacks hurt. And besides, he already saw everything there was to see in the world.
The village had everything he needed. And that was only a skip away.
There was a chapel with a spire to nod at. A market with traders selling all the things he didn’t need. Enough taverns that Willem rightfully wondered if they should be growing barley instead of corn. And Rosie by the river as well.
What did the towns and cities of Weinstadt have, other than taller spires to nod at, louder traders to ignore and even more taverns to wonder if they were growing the right fields? And none of them had Rosie. Although they probably had nicer rivers.
This was Willem’s life.
One farm boy among many, content with his lot in the world.
The problem was that the world wasn’t content in return.
That day, the flames rose as high as the sun, lifting it to keep the dusk from setting. It would have made no difference if it had. Even a single field burning was like a painting of the end of the world. A blanket of smoke visible even to the heavens. And certainly to the villagers.
They’d come rushing carrying water by the palms.
The flames were doused by their blood instead.
Even now, Willem didn’t understand why soldiers would attack his fields. He understood less why they would put a gash on Margie’s face or make sure Cody would never walk again. Rebels they called him, and all of them with him. Willem didn’t know who they were rebelling against, other than the king mice which plagued his fields.
They didn’t care. Nor did their swords.
“[Entangling vines]!”
But the ones who stopped them?
They cared, at least.
And that’s all that mattered.
Willem could only gawp.
The sight of his burning fields were joined by something even more frightening. Roots the likes of which could strangle an oak sprouting from the ground. Half the soldiers were taken there and then, their swords as good against the roots as Willem’s pleas had been on their ears.
Those were the lucky ones.
“[Hamstring Volley]!”
Arrows came thick and fast, striking those who’d not been taken by the roots.
They hit their marks cleanly, most dead centre in knee caps or else striking through the shin or ankle. They fell clutching their legs, crying out in pain at the shafts gone halfway through.
Somehow, there was an even greater song playing in the background.
“[Sprinkling Chorus]!”
A tune so thick and vibrant it could be seen as ribbons of water dancing in the air. It flowed across the field as beautiful as any rain Willem had seen, calming the flames like a mother’s lullaby.
Willem could only blink as the smoke lessened, and the figures strolled through his fields.
An elven woman in a dress of green leaves, each finger outstretched as she commanded the vines with unseen strings. A halfling man with a bow almost his height, three arrows notched to the strings as his bright eyes searched for the targets he hadn’t struck true. A man with a spotted lilac poncho, smiling away as he orchestrated the ribbons of water from his lute.
Adventurers.
Willem didn’t know their names. But he knew what they were.
The very aura they carried with them was different. The ease with which they walked amidst the smoking field spoke of years of experience. And the one leading them spoke of it louder than them all.
Willem almost backed away as the man approached, even though the stranger was his saviour. He had a gruff look not unlike his own father, his eyes powerful and stern.
But that was only when he was eyeing the soldiers.
The look he offered Willem was far more gentle. A sharp contrast to the sword he held, more impressive than all the weapons now dropped to the ground.
“Are you well, lad?” he asked, his voice as querying as it was kind.
Willem gulped before he could respond, feeling the dryness in his throat from the sudden turn of events.
Then, he turned to the others nearby. To Margie’s face wet with blood and Cody who couldn’t even stand. He was shocked to see that the man with the lute was attending to both, using nothing but a weave of his song to heal their wounds.
Somehow, he must have looked like one of the worst here, to be the first spoken to.
“I’m … I’m well … thank you, heroes.”
The man put a hand on his shoulder.
“Well done on standing your ground. But next time, don’t be afraid to take the wiser choice. A farm can be regrown, no matter how dire the flames. But a soul once departed can never return.”
Willem could only nod.
“I’ll … I’ll do that … thank you.”
“Good. Now, don’t suppose you could tell us where we are?”
“Hagel.” Willem paused. “In Weinstadt.”
His answer drew a bellow of laughter from the halfling scooping up the fallen weaponry, even though his ears shouldn’t have been able to catch Willem’s tepid voice.
“You hear that?” said the halfling, cheerfully turning to the others. “We’re in the right country, at least! Who’s the one who doubted me?”
“You doubted yourself,” replied the elven woman, bundling all the soldiers together into one entangled heap. “To our pains, I want to add. We should not have to constantly reassure our own ranger.”
“I do better with positive feedback!”
“Well, in that case, we should already be in an inn, hauling Cedric away from the bar after having fulfilled all of our tasks with time to spare.”
Snorts of indignation, laughter and elbowing.
A scene of companionship.
Amidst the ruins of his farm, that was all Willem saw as other soldiers came to take their own comrades away. He didn’t know enough to understand what was different about these ones, other than they were accompanied by a man claiming to be their lord.
Willem had never seen him before in his life.
Still, he received crowns in copper and silver for his troubles, taken from the coin pouches of the soldiers. He received a few more in gold, gifted by the halfling with a wink. The others did similar, the elven woman donating a satchel of leaves filled with new seeds, the lutist offering a song to lift his ailing crops, and the leader leaving behind a soldier’s sword hidden away from the lord.
His advice was to flee. But not to do so unarmed, apparently.
Willem clutched at all he received. But when the adventurers left, he wanted something else instead.
He wanted to be just like them.
Willem of Hagel wished to be a hero.
He made a wish.
And that … was that.
Click.
Maybe for others, it took an incantation steeped in black words. A sacrifice of goats and hens. Black robes and a thousand smouldering candles.
Willem only had to ponder. And then his Benefactor came.
The world froze with a snap of the fingers.
Had Willem been smarter, he would have turned his eyes down and let the words drift past.
He didn’t.
And so instead, he looked up to see a face so regal that emperors would have traded for it.
A devil from what lies beneath the abyss.
And what he offered was a contract smoking from the ring of flames used to conjure it.
Willem knew enough stories to see that was a bad sign. But then, he also knew that devils never approached those who could say no. He was no exception.
Especially when the cause was noble. Or as noble as a devil in a fine suit could offer.
“A demon. A fiend. And a devil,” said his Benefactor. “No innocents being reaped. No angels to be plucked. Only three of the most vile, most dangerous and more deranged of the hells. Defeat them–and this power is yours to keep. And should you not want it anymore, well, there’s a simple exit clause. One utterly pedestrian, to keep the theme of nothing amiss. A sum of crowns and no more.”
“... No trading of my soul? No eternal damnation?”
“Damnation? Not in the slightest. For one thing, that isn’t mine to administer, Willem of Hagel. That’s the realm of the heavens, not the hells. Even if it was, I desire nothing of the sort. This is a transaction for your services. Your soul, whole and hearty as it is, is yours.”
A smile and a contract so short there was no room for deceit.
And all Willem was asked to do was to use his powers as any hero would. To destroy evil.
What could go wrong?
The answer, as it turned out, was everything.
A farmer turned saviour. The accolades came thick and fast, clouding his eyes long before any wine fell upon his lips. He didn’t notice, during those days of pretending at righteousness, the haze which covered his sight. And when he did, he realised only too late it was more than his eyes which were failing him.
It was his soul.
He didn’t know why. He didn’t know how. But he knew it as he clutched at that fading part of him.
That’s when he stopped seeking justice for those who were most wronged. And instead sought retribution for those with the most crowns.
And so as each day he became richer, so too did he become poorer.
Willem felt as little joy from comfort as he did misery from squalor. Only in the worst things a tavern could offer did he experience the familiarity of wretchedness. The comfort of a migraine swimming through his head. The warmth of nauseousness.
And when he couldn’t, well–
It was usually because he was being bothered.
“... A curious place you find yourself,” said the girl, sitting at his table before he could frighten her away. “Are you often found brooding in the corners of taverns?”
The girl smiled, her golden hair slipping from beneath the hood she wore.
Willem blinked through the haze.
It made no difference. It never did. But for this girl, he didn’t need the clarity which only became better with wine to see. There was as little warmth in her grey eyes as there was in his.
Peas in a pod, then.
And so instead of ushering her away, he gestured towards the chair she was already sitting on.
“Taverns are beautiful this time of year,” he replied, his throat sore from whatever he’d last been served in an attempt to drive him away. “Its corners in particular. This right here? This one’s my favourite. Look carefully, and you can see the engravings on the table. A thousand and more signatures. One of them has to be famous.”
The girl’s smile continued unabated.
“A signed table is no fitting home for a man as renowned as yourself,” she said, pulling her cloak around herself. “From the tales I’ve heard, you should be raised upon a pedestal.”
Willem chuckled. A sign of life amidst the only tavern yet to bar him.
It was an instinctive reaction, one of muscles and expectation. He felt as much amusement as he did an ale so watered down it’d been drawn straight from a well.
“Depends on the pedestal,” he replied. “I’ve a few gallows waiting for me. Myself and any I speak with. Should you know who I am, you’d best be on your way.”
“And why would I do that, when I came so far to search for you?”
Willem offered no reply. The girl leaned towards him, offering a smile he could barely discern.
“... The records of you paint a picture of a hero in his prime. One who can defeat his foes in a flash of righteous light. And how many you’ve slain. The villainous princes of rotting kingdoms. The unfeeling lords trampling their own subjects … and also great demons and fiends, hidden amidst shadows and schemes, the likes of which even the Silver Aurelia could never erase.”
The girl raised a hand, drawing the attention of a barmaid. She took the entire tray, laying enough pints to slay a normal man upon the table. Willem didn’t reach for a single one.
“I know who you are,” she said, tapping at a stein. “And no pauper’s clothing will ever hide the look of one with as storied a history as yourself. I would like to make you an offer, Willem of Hagel.”
Willem prodded at something crawling upon his lap. And then he sighed.
Even with his eyes as poor as they were, he could see this girl lacked the years to possess the types of foes worth the use of his cursed ability. One he had to use sparingly. It was his road to salvation as much as it was to the abyss.
“I’ll respectfully decline. I’m afraid I’ve no answers for what troubles a young maiden these days.”
“Mine is the same as most. To be freed from those of wicked hearts and wicked deeds. Because it is not only the Kingdom of Weinstadt which finds itself under the yoke of foul rulers. And there are so few heroes in the world these days. And even fewer with the crowns to hire them.”
The girl smiled.
“I wish to bring down a kingdom,” she said simply. “Are you available?”
She lifted a stein and offered it to him.
Willem gave it a moment’s thought.
And then he took it, never realising that at that moment, he’d forgotten even the face of deceit.
If he hadn’t, he’d surely have chosen to sink than to rise from the gutters once again … if only to avoid the ignominy of frightening a single girl.
“I did warn you not to stick your hands in the flames.”
It was the least of tasks. And a horrific way to use his abilities.
But tonight, he’d unleash what was needed to spare the people from the villainy of the kingdom’s rulers. It mattered little that it should start here, sending the least of Tirea’s royalty to the bliss of sleep while her nation was given over to better hands, even as it burned.
Except it hadn’t turned out that way.
Not even in the slightest.
“There are no such things as regular princesses. We all have our talents. Mine happens to be all of them.”
Willem continued to raise his pitchfork against a girl who had no right to be standing.
Especially within his own world.
He knew from the moment she evaded his first attack that there was something different about her. And not only because he was strengthened in his world. But because everyone else was enfeebled.
Those he drew into his [Soulscape] were also drawn under a malaise more heavy than any charm, their legs stilted as though wading through marsh, and their arms weighed by the sky itself. The moment she’d been able to stop the knock he intended for her head, he knew something was wrong.
“[Spring Breeze]!!”
He especially knew it when she sent the power of a miniaturised hurricane into his face.
A force which propelled him so hard that he didn’t have time to brace. He could feel the whole force of the impact as he struck against soil that by all accounts didn’t exist. And there was pain. Plenty of it. A sensation foreign to him outside of a tavern.
But even more so here.
Everything about experiencing pain in his own sanctum was wrong.
He’d underestimated her. But it wasn’t just because she gave no hint about her prowess.
There was normally nothing to underestimate.
Here in the world created by his own soul, he’d brought down fiends so horrific they held names which couldn’t be spoken without the tongue boiling. And still their encounters could never be called a battle.
To him, this was his field of crops. The last memory which would ever leave him. The last call to joy.
To all others, it was an execution ground.
“Ohhohohohoohohohooohohohhhoohohohohohoho!!”
This princess decided it was her canvas instead.
Willem didn’t understand how his hellish ability worked. But he knew it was a mirror of his soul. The most powerful part of him, even weakened as it was. And she managed to break it.
No … not break.
She painted over it.
Dancing like a minstrel from the Summer Kingdoms, she twirled her sword to a song of her own laughter, drawing upon its tip the ribbons of his own soul. And as she danced, that which had become grey and faded turned into colours anew.
Life blossomed as flowers he’d never seen even in dreams, drawn upon beds of grass and shrubs bristling with the movement of newly birthed creatures. The sky itself flourished, a sunlight which shouldn’t exist peeking between clouds that had been wiped away to a slate of clearest spring.
And for the first time since he left his farm, Willem of Hagel began to remember.
He began to see.
His world bristled with all the colours of the rainbow, draped over a garden of all the seasons.
He could feel beyond doubt that something within him was coming together like a broken garment sewn anew. The mistakes that’d made would never become undone, but the gaping hole in the dam was sealed.
That which was leaking was finally closed. And somewhere, a devil hummed in surprise.
As Willem dropped to his knees, all he could feel before his eyes closed was long lost feelings of fatigue, relief and confusion returning like a sweeping wave to wash the consciousness from his mind.
Because more than anything, he wanted to know a single answer.
Within his [Soulscape], Willem cheated fate.
He was no warrior. But he didn’t need to be.
A swing of his arms alone was enough. Every part of him rose to become no less than S-rank, while those he faced were laid bare, their strength stripped like armour from their person.
For her to defeat him while bearing such a handicap …
Just what rank did this princess start as?
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I run a small business and use pfsense as my firewall on a small fanless device with 4 cores and 16gb of ram. I’m ramping up home services to cut cloud cost and thinking of using a Dell r630 or something similar on symetrical fiber. I’m going to eventually run it redundantly but not there just yet. I was also looking at super micro SYS model but seems expensive for small form factor and less redundancy. Any recommendations appreciated. Running many micro services that are protected by this firewall with many rules, interfaces & vlans, wireguard, haproxy, and snort ips. If I switch traffic over to the home lab I don’t think the fanless device will survive the spikes. Any advice appreciated. TIA.

I’m an American and I went to London for work (just on a tourist visa). I was on a long night out and outside of a club and was robbed by a few locals that had been friendly to me. I was pretty faded and (very stupidly I know) handed my phone to them so they could put their number in it (they’d done this once before in front of a bunch of people but this time, they wanted to “make sure the number was right”) and then they took off. They ended up with my work phone too and apparently had seen me type in my passcode because the next morning I woke up to my Google accounts’ passwords having been changed and my entire life savings emptied out of my bank account. Mostly, they used Venmo (my checking account was linked to it) to buy a bunch of cryptocurrency. They also made some purchases with my credit card.

It's a long story but through a freak technological accident I managed to get back into my Google accounts and get into the burner email address they created when they started robbing me (they used it as the recovery email for my Google accounts and as the email for my Uber account). I was able to get the address of a luxury apartment they reserved for a few days with my credit card (through PayPal), the address where some expensive clothes they bought were delivered, and the addresses of a lot of Uber rides they took with every credit card they’d ever used. I turned all of this information into the police and it was days before they decided to take on the case, and an officer still hasn’t been assigned to it to my knowledge. I gave them the IMEI numbers of the phones, which they have used for days without even dumping the sim card.

The only thing the police seem to be interested in is finding out the location of where the robbery took place. I told them that it was near a night club in a certain neighborhood, and when they called me and told me they’d take on the case and asked me for it, I gave them a description of myself and the outfit that I was wearing.

The reason why I haven’t told them the location of this nightclub is that there is footage of me snorting a white powder several times. The manager of the club told me this when I went back and told him the story. Also, we were huffing gas (nitrous oxide)—I was really high and it was really bad quality and I passed out for a few seconds with the phones in my hands—that’s how they ended up being able to take my phones. Afterwards, I confronted them about it, but one of the three had left already and then a second one left while I was arguing with one of them.

I’m not sure if I should tell the cops the name of this night club. Can I get into legal trouble from snorting a white powder on CCTV? Would it jeopardize any future trips to the UK? Would they tell my employer? These guys really messed up my life (I have to close my bank account, cancel my credit cards, and family members have had to cancel their cards too because of this) and I don’t want them to get away with this.

And yes, I know that I was being a complete dumbass. I just want some sincere advice on what I should do. Do you think it is worth it for me to tell them the location so they can obtain the CCTV footage? Or should I just play it safe and let the crooks get away with it?

I’m an American and I went to London for work (just on a tourist visa). I was on a long night out and outside of a club and was robbed by a few locals that had been friendly to me. I was pretty faded and (very stupidly I know) handed my phone to them so they could put their number in it (they’d done this once before in front of a bunch of people but this time, they wanted to “make sure the number was right”) and then they took off. They ended up with my work phone too and apparently had seen me type in my passcode because the next morning I woke up to my Google accounts’ passwords having been changed and my entire life savings emptied out of my bank account. Mostly, they used Venmo (my checking account was linked to it) to buy a bunch of cryptocurrency. They also made some purchases with my credit card.

It's a long story but through a freak technological accident I managed to get back into my Google accounts and get into the burner email address they created when they started robbing me (they used it as the recovery email for my Google accounts and as the email for my Uber account). I was able to get the address of a luxury apartment they reserved for a few days with my credit card (through PayPal), the address where some expensive clothes they bought were delivered, and the addresses of a lot of Uber rides they took with every credit card they’d ever used. I turned all of this information into the police and it was days before they decided to take on the case, and an officer still hasn’t been assigned to it to my knowledge. I gave them the IMEI numbers of the phones, which they have used for days without even dumping the sim card.

The only thing the police seem to be interested in is finding out the location of where the robbery took place. I told them that it was near a night club in a certain neighborhood, and when they called me and told me they’d take on the case and asked me for it, I gave them a description of myself and the outfit that I was wearing.

The reason why I haven’t told them the location of this nightclub is that there is footage of me snorting a white powder several times. The manager of the club told me this when I went back and told him the story. Also, we were huffing gas (nitrous oxide)—I was really high and it was really bad quality and I passed out for a few seconds with the phones in my hands—that’s how they ended up being able to take my phones. Afterwards, I confronted them about it, but one of the three had left already and then a second one left while I was arguing with one of them.

I’m not sure if I should tell the cops the name of this night club. Can I get into legal trouble from snorting a white powder on CCTV? Would it jeopardize any future trips to the UK? Would they tell my employer? These guys really messed up my life (I have to close my bank account, cancel my credit cards, and family members have had to cancel their cards too because of this) and I don’t want them to get away with this.

And yes, I know that I was being a complete dumbass. I just want some sincere advice on what I should do. Do you think it is worth it for me to tell them the location so they can obtain the CCTV footage? Or should I just play it safe and let the crooks get away with it?

Has anyone else had a total knee replacement? How long did it take to stop hurting?
I had mine done 4-8-24, and I've been in constant pain since.
Two oxycodone knock the pain down to a 2-3, but put my brain into neutral. It bothers me a lot that my tolerance for pain medication has increased so much, it is scary.
I am exercising and going to PT, I can walk without a cane, I know it's getting better, I'm just so tired of the constant pain.
Any advice is very welcome.

This is a slightly convoluted story so I will try to make it as encompassing of all things relevant as possible. Myself, 21F, am dating my now boyfriend Clark, 22M. We have been together for almost 2 years now and we decided to take a trip to meet my lifelong friends and family and visit my hometown while I had to also get a few health appointments dealt with(I am currently studying out of province in Canada and have to fly 4-6 hours to fly home and visit everyone). This was something that meant so much to me as I haven’t had the chance to see my lifelong friends in a few years and have some truly meaningful connections that I would truly want to meet Clark. Before going into the entire ordeal, to give a little background, Clark does NOT like change, anything that sends him out of his comfort zone requires time and planning and a LOT of reassurance. I on the other hand love to be entirely miscellaneous and adventurous, love to travel and try new things which has been a point of contention in our relationship. To render some insight on this, we often see each other on the same days every week, for example Monday, Wednesday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday. Just like that. Too many days apart and he loses it. If I had an assignment or exam and could not se him that day, he loses it. If I take extra time to workout and can’t make it back right on the dot, loses it. And by lose it, he berates me with questions on why it is necessary and if it is more important than us, tells me he cares more about me than (enter whatever reason I have to cancel, reschedule, or arrive at a different time). He says he becomes deeply sad and the first hours of us seeing each other the next time or day, usually consist of me needing to console him on this. His mother needs to reassure him of everything and when it’s not her, he seeks me out. There have been many situations where I have to reassure him of things out of our control just so he feels better. He is also already seeing a therapist and has ADD, but is otherwise completely healthy from what doctors and therapists have said.
This was never a problem as I love to be able to share new things and see him open up to new experiences, however, this year he agreed to come on a trip with me back to my hometown. As we boarded the plane and sat down, Clark started to get a little nervous, fidgeting and moving about in his seat, until I inevitably asked what was wrong and he said that he just was worried about what if he got sick, what if he had to stay in my hometown a little more than needed. That’s when I replied that the worst would be just that, he got sick, took some time to recover and then we could go home or we just fly home and it was not a huge deal. This is when this man absolutely lost it. He started to basically hyperventilate and as the plane took off, he asked me what if he can’t go back, to which I said it’s the summer and he would just have to inform his McDonald’s managers that he would need a week extra if he was THAT sick and that sent him. He start to cry, so much so that he was hyperventilating and his snob was all over. I didn’t know what to do and was frankly mortified as people were looking over and he looked at me begging me to confirm and reassure that he was not gonna get sick as though I was some damn doctor and not just a psych student trying to catch up with some friends. He looked at me literally snorting his own snot and was begging that I just say it was impossible he get sick because he just HAD to get back home. I refused to talk to him the rest of the flight and things eventually just moved on as we were picked up by my friends. Throughout the trip he kept absolutely begging me to just say he was not getting sick and we would get home. If I said something along the lines of “so what if you do, we will deal with that when we get there and I will be there with you for it” he would lose it and when I did eventually snap and said he could get sick and it wasn’t the end of the world, he called his mom and had to talk to her for an hour before feeling calm again. After all I can think of is ending our relationship but we have so much deep roots history and have frankly grown so much together that I am at a loss for what to do, I feel like I may be cold in my reaction but my friends even felt that there was something off. Has anyone been through something similar that might have advice on their own experience or just some external point of view may be helpful to shed light on this entire thing?
Edit: I want to clarify that this was my complete breaking point. This was not my reaction to his every breakdown and I was there for him time and time again. We both went through some incredibly though times and I was there for him through it all as much as I could. I gave him every resource I could, whether he listened or not, the different and what made me have a harder time empathizing was where I lost a close friend of mine while also going through a major eating disorder which I feel now may be more relevant to the story, his reaction was to tell me it was my own thing and that I had to just “deal with it” because he had nothing else to say and went to bed literally right after. Only to “need me” a few days later because he left his work after he felt that people weren’t respecting him enough at McDonald’s where he currently works. It’s just hard to understand where we balance things out and how much my care and attention is reciprocated
Edit 2: I added some more details on our relationship to shed insight on it, as I can see there are some things that may need more detail to get a better picture. As for those of you wondering if he has any problems, such as being in the spectrum, he does not have anything and is not on the spectrum, he has ADD but takes medication for it as well and even if he didn’t I have many friends who do and are not like this.

I’ve had CRPS since I broke my foot in 2020. It has since spread to my other foot. I have never been given opioids— aside from one time when I had an extremely bad flare— but nerve block injections help me a lot, so I get them regularly.
I had some trouble with insurance and have been fighting to get them to approve more injections (it’s been 8 months), but in the meantime my doctor prescribed oxycodone. It’s very helpful and I can actually get out of bed and do stuff now, I can leave my house, spend time with my family, etc.
I’ve just received a call that my insurance that the injections were approved. This is good news, however I fear that my doctor will take away my medication. They have been telling me every time I see them that they will stop prescribing it when I can get injections again. While the injections help quite a bit, they are not magic. I still have bad days, flare ups, sometimes I struggle to get out of bed due to the pain, etc.
I feel that having regular injections + pain medication could be very beneficial and allow me to function almost normally. I am not sure my doctor will agree though. They always say I am too young to take opioids (I am 26). All I want is adequate pain relief, is that so much to ask got? Does anyone have some advice for speaking to my doctor? I have tried to switch doctors but did not have a good experience. There are few doctors in my town, and they are not knowledgeable of CRPS (one even accused me of faking my illness).

Chapter CXCIX
​
Trout's Landing.
​
"Alright, should pro'bly be productive today." Jeb said with a groan as he stretched.
​
A moss bed wasn't half bad, he thought as he turned to the still snoozing Ruby. He leaned over and kissed her scaled head and tucked their eggs a bit further into the fur blanket to keep warm. He got up and looked around at his new home. The space was illuminated by only his glowing eyes but it didn't make the place feel any less cozy.
​
"Maybe dragons had a point living in underground lairs." Jeb muttered as he began walking down the tunnel before having to stoop a little to avoid several roots and rocks that jutted from the dirt.
​
He entered the main gathering area of the burrows. It didn't seem like he slept for long at least if the faint light from the ventilation shafts were any indication. The area was still abuzz with activity just like it was before as well. Kobolds darted this way and that as they bartered, traded, sorted, or decorated and expanded the burrows at an increased rate than just a day or so prior.
​
Jeb took note of the tools they used. While they didn't have them for long, they were starting to show the wear and tear of constant use. Not only that but they were a little unwieldy in the claws of the kobolds. Everything was a tad too big and the kobolds found themselves exerting more energy than necessary.
​
The kobolds made up for it by forging their own tools from stone and wood, but that wasn't any better. While more easy to hold and wield, the quality wasn't the best and already a pile for broken tools was forming as they tried their best to repair them.
​
They needed metal tools. Some good solid sturdy ones that they could hold easily, Jeb thought with a sigh and left the cool earthen dwelling for the cold air above. He shook his head to shake away the weird feeling of the temp and air changes before making his way back towards his now former room at the admin building.
​
With word of him vacating the building, the kobolds were quick to seize upon the opportunity to lay claim to it as he watched several of the zippy red-scaled lizards already scavenging what wasn't nailed down, and even those that were weren't safe either. But he didn't care anymore, Jeb thought as a kobold ran around collecting discarded pieces of pamphlets. He had a new, and cozier, home.
​
He entered his temporary room and found what he was looking for. A bundle of burgundy silk and gilded armor. While he took everything of worth with him down into his new home, he left the bundle of silk and gaudy gold behind along with the ruined remains of his sleeping bag and bed. While the kobolds had already started taking apart the room, none had touched the silk just yet though he did note that there were a couple of pieces of gilded armor missing since last he saw it.
​
"Oh well." Jeb muttered with a shrug and grabbed the bundle of silk and debated taking the remaining gilded armor or not.
​
While he was sure the kobolds would love nothing more than to add the gaudy things to their piles of scrap, the gold alone should be enough to buy some tools from the dwarves, Jeb thought and grabbed the remaining boot and gauntlet. Bundle of silk in, mostly, good condition? Check. A third of the gilded armor? Check. This should be enough, he thought as he left the kobolds to pilfer and deconstruct the cabin to their hearts content.
​
"Pro'bly shouldn't just appear in their office." Jeb muttered as he thought how to best appear without alarming anyone at the trainyard.
​
After some thought though, he decided that simply appearing within the trainyard itself wouldn't be TOO alarming. He hoped anyway. He COULD appear outside the trainyard. But given how last time went he wasn't sure if they'll just shoot him on sight. At least appearing inside would give him a chance to talk to whoever was in charge before potentially getting shot at.
​
With a sigh and no small amount of trepidation, Jeb thought of being just outside of the old workers' mess where he and the others would play their games.
"Just hope I don't get shot at."
​
-----
​
Ulrin Mercantile Hub.
​
What a mess, Forgrim thought as he watched the last of the funerary rites be performed from a distance. He and the others in his situation remained outside of the official service. They had no right to participate in a dwarven funeral. To be there when the honored dead were laid below the stone in the cool, firm, embrace of The Stone Father while their spirits traveled down into his Halls where they rest and prepare. Their deeds and accomplishments read aloud for all to hear while they feast and make merry until the Stone Father calls on them when the Day of Sundering comes and they are given forms of stone, hand crafted by the Stone Father himself that will march upon the land and remake it anew.
​
Or that was how a dwarven funeral was supposed to go. The hallowed runery was still unfinished and so such sacred services couldn't be held. From here he and the others couldn't tell what was ultimately done to the bodies, but even from a distance he could tell that none were happy about the state of affairs. Even a funeral had some merriment to it as they celebrated the dead's life and feats. But with such sacred ceremonies seemingly absent it wasn't looking like there would be such celebrations.
​
Forgrim sighed. They were in a sorry state. Work was progressing steadily true. But the moral of the Hub was abysmal. The lack of decent iron for tools, the recent attack, and the stormy look on Ulrin's face when he and the others returned did nothing to improve it. Especially when he declared that warriors were going to be sent into the mines in increased numbers than before.
​
Forgrim wasn't looking forward to going underground anymore. After seeing what lurked there in this land it was looking like he wasn't the only one. Unlike him and the few others from that day on the hill though, the others merely stiffened their backs and took to their new duties with the grim determination typical of any dwarf.
​
Yet another thing that seemed to separate them from their kin, Forgrim thought grimly. Any dwarf would do the same. No matter what lurked in the dark a dwarf would march down to meet it as the Edicts of The Stone Father claimed. Everything made of stone was theirs by right. Anything lurking there were merely squatters that needed reminding.
​
But he and the others could barely look at the dark awning tunnels forming in the mountain without terror and dread gripping their hearts. They were likely to die from fear alone before any horror could claim them, Forgrim thought broodingly.
​
He and the others had thought to go to the rune priests after the attack in order to resolve their issues. But they were so busy with the aftermath and were even more so when the head rune priest returned barking out orders while also organizing funerary services.
​
It seemed their plight would linger on for a while longer, he thought as their foreman barked at them to return to work. He sighed as he picked up his pickax and trudged along with the others towards an area designated as a new opening into the mountain. He heard others receiving similar orders and turned to look around. From what he could tell it seemed a greater effort in excavation and mining was being issued. Most of the guards stationed were being moved towards the areas as well with a small force left behind to deal with any goblins or troublemakers.
​
Wonder why so many were being moved. Why wouldn't they keep more above after the last attack, Forgrim thought before running into someone with a huff. The person he ran into grunted and lent a hand in assisting him up as he spoke.
"Sorry 'bout that."
​
"No problem manlin'. I weren't watch-" Forgrim started before he stopped speaking as he gazed up and saw the face of the one he had ran into.
​
The face before him belonged to a seemingly normal human. But all he could picture was stark white bone, baleful eyes, and grasping vines tearing at his clothes and flesh! The others from that day could speak no more than he could. One of them could only manage a single gasping word no more than a whisper.
"Haunter."
​
The Haunter frowned as he gazed down at Forgrim and the other dwarves.
"I'm sorry, have we met?"
​
The lack of aggression was enough for them all to find their feet enough to turn tail and flee as fast as they could. None of them were proud of it. But Forgrim dared any dwarf to not feel the same after what they went through from that creature! He didn't even look back as he ran. He was sure their foreman was yelling at them but his heart hammered in his ears like battle drums and his vision had tunneled and the only thing he could think of was escape!
​
-----
​
"That was weird." Jeb muttered as he watched the dwarves run like the hounds of hell were after them.
​
"Oh well." He declared with a shrug and made sure he still had his stuff before turning around and heading towards the manager's office building.
​
He knocked before entering and looked around at the even more chaotic mess that the office was since last he saw it. Gnomes ran around every where as they scribbled and scratched away as they copied papers into some form of runic script before stuffing them into spots of their bulging packs of office supplies they hauled around everywhere they went. Some were making adjustments to the maps of the area with words in the same sort of runes that the dwarves use.
​
Some he saw were also flicking away on those old calculators where you slid a bead or something from one side to the other. Others were chatting away a hundred miles an hour while poking and prodding the ancient computers around the place as they seemed to be trying to figure out how they worked.
​
A few looked like they figured out how they worked, but were having trouble with the keys like they weren't sure what did what. He could see a couple gnomes scratching away at the keys as they tried to re-type them in the runic script as they tried to translate Latin to Dwarven Runic with seemingly frustrating progress.
​
"Can I help you manlin'?" A gruff voice called from the manager's office.
​
Jeb turned and saw the same gilded dwarf he had done business with before glaring at him from the open doorway. The dwarf rumbled and glared at him more intently.
"What do you want?"
​
"Well, I thought maybe ya'll might be interested in a trade?" Jeb said uncertainly as he held up the gilded armor and silk.
​
The dwarf glared at him for a moment before turning a discerning eye towards his offerings. He rumbled and stroked his gilded beard with his bejeweled hand for a long moment, leaving Jeb to stand there awkwardly as the dwarf seemed to debate whether or not to entertain him.
​
"Very well godlin'. I will hear you." He rumbled at last before gesturing for Jeb to follow him into his office.
​
So Jeb did. He entered the office and saw that it was as much changed as the rest of the place. Piles of coins littered the desk along with no small amount of scales and other tools he wasn't familiar with along side many gems and jewels that glittered in the light of the room. Even the rest of the small office wasn't safe from the wealth as neat piles were scattered everywhere there was room for it while a single gnome hammered away at the computer on the desk while also jumping to doing a dozen other tasks within the room.
​
"What's yer offer?" Ulrin rumbled as the gnome took a brief break from his multitasking and produced several pieces of paper, a quill, and an inkwell from the large pack he had and stared intently at Jeb with rapt attention as he held onto the dripping quill like it would write the words of God Himself.
​
"Uhm, well. I was wonderin' if you were lookin' to trade some tools. Or if you would be willin' to sell 'em with this?" Jeb asked and placed the gaudy golden armor and the burgundy silk onto a clear(ish) spot on the desk.
​
As the gnome scribbled away every word Jeb said, Ulrin picked up the armor with ease and sneered at the macabre designs. He snorted but produced an eye piece to inspect the details. After several long minutes of rumbling in thought, Ulrin produced several small hammers and placed his ear against the metal before lightly tapping them. He'd rumble and do the same again in a different spot before repeating the long process again with the other piece.
​
Whatever he was doing Jed didn't have a fucking Scooby what it was. But apparently the gnome did because he scribbled down in that same Runic after every grumble and sound. At long last, Ulrin sat aside the gilded pieces and cocked a brow questioningly at the silk. He grunted and picked up the bundle of torn burgundy silk.
​
Jeb almost cursed out loud when the dwarf gave a mighty yank on the silk! The dwarf's eyebrows going up a little bit in surprise made him feel better though. Though watching him do the same thing several more times was a bit irritating. With each tug and yank he was sure it would tear, especially since he tore through it with a claw pretty easily. But it held just as fast and firm as before.
​
Ulrin seemed more satisfied with the silk than he was with the gold armor. At least to Jeb he seemed to be.
"So? Do we have a deal?"
​
The dwarf hummed and rumbled as he glanced between the golden armor and the silk. He drummed his fingers in a way that reminded Jeb of pawnbrokers on TV just before they give some horseshit low ball offer. He wasn't exactly wrong.
"No."
​
"No?" Jeb asked a little surprised.
​
"Tha armor is solid gold and more than acceptable quality. And tha silk is surprisingly strong."
​
"But?"
​
"But it's not enough for dwarven craft. I can offer a fair price for 'em though." Ulrin declared.
​
"I don't need money, I need tools." Jeb stated.
​
"Then I can't help you. What tools we have are needed at tha moment."
​
"Can't you make more? Aren't dwarves supposed to be master craftsman?" Jeb asked.
​
"Aye! It's not a matter o' craft but quality!" Ulrin declared a little heatedly.
​
"What's the matter?"
​
"We're lackin' in good iron." The dwarf stated simply.
​
"Iron? It's everywhere! It's just as common as coal!"
​
"Bah! Worthless! Not fit ta be made inta a piss pot!" Ulrin declared.
​
"I'm not askin' for a fuckin' tank made of the stuff! Just some small tools!" Jeb countered.
​
Ulrin narrowed his gaze at Jeb.
"Tha lizards?"
​
Jeb returned his glare.
"Yeah. The kobolds."
​
Ulrin snorted derisively.
"I'll not hand superior dwarven craft for a pittance like this, and especially not ta yer lizards!"
​
Jeb growled and left gouges in the desk. But the dwarf wasn't intimidated and met his glare easily.
"I'll not be swindled twice godlin'! Come back with somethin' o' equal value or not at all!"
​
Jeb snarled and started to stand when a thought came to him.
"What about food?"
​
Ulrin cocked a questioning brow at the sudden shift.
"What about it godlin'?"
​
"Alot of people 'round here. Got enough to feed 'em?" Jeb asked.
​
"What concern is it o' yers?" Ulrin asked guardedly.
​
"What if I offered a supply of food along with this in exchange for tools made for the kobolds?"
​
"Bah! Even if we were starvin' I wouldn't trade dwarven craft ta those lizards!"
​
"So don't! I don't need your best work! Just somethin' small and decent enough for the kobolds!" Jeb countered as his anger roiled just under the surface.
​
The dwarf grunted and turned to the gnome and spoke in some sort of shared language that Jeb was more than surprised that he could actually understand!
"How are we on rations?"
​
"Not good Master Ulrin. Even with shipments from the humans we won't have enough for winter without hunting." The gnome replied in the same language.
​
"Even without this farce o' an agreement keepin' us off tha surface o' tha mountain, with tha cold comin' it wouldn't matter." Ulrin rumbled in his language and stroked his beard in thought.
​
Jeb looked over to the piles of gold and jewels and other finery in order to make it seem like he couldn't understand them. One trick he learned from Morty, just because you know another language doesn't mean you have to let a native speaker know you do. He said you'd be surprised what they let slip when they think you don't know what they're saying.
​
Something he realized was actually surprisingly good advice from Morty, Jeb thought as he spied a garnet embedded golden band. It almost looked like a ring but was a little big to be one. Maybe a bracelet, Jeb thought as Ulrin and the gnome finished speaking and turned back to Jeb.
"What do you offer?"
​
"Fish, game, and some produce." Jeb replied.
​
Ulrin stroked his beard in thought. If Jeb hadn't just heard what he and the gnome were talking about he'd be a bit more worried. But now he could tell he was obviously haggling.
"We will need ta see tha food. If it's acceptable then we'll talk."
​
"Great. Wait right there." Jeb said as he got up and moved his chair back a little as he did so.
​
"When will you ret-" Ulrin started before blinking as Jeb had vanished from the spot he was in just a moment ago!
​
The dwarf sighed. He hated dealing with otherworldly beings. He took the time to appraise the offerings again. The armor was of elf make. While macabre, there was enough overly fine pretty designs in it that made it obvious. The way certain things flowed or were carved could only be made by elven hands. But at the same time it was also crude. Like it wasn't entirely made by elves, he noted.
​
Worth a pretty sum if only to melt it down into something of actual value, he thought as he picked up the silk. The color was a unique shade. While it looked to have been roughed up a little, it still held firmly. If he could get more from the godling then he could make a nice profit from selling it. He knew that some nobles, of this world or their own, would pay a fortune for a dress or doublet made of it.
​
He tugged on it once again and gave an approving grunt.
"Strong stuff."
​
He reached for his sword as the godling reappeared from thin air with barely a sound.
"I'm back."
​
Jeb got the vertigo feeling he did last time he did a rapid port and he fell back into his chair with a groan.
"Oh that's not a fun feelin'."
​
He leaned forward and handed a small box full of what he had to offer. Ulrin took it easily enough and peered into it. He saw all sorts of strange things. Blue apples, nightmarish fish, some small rodents already dressed, blackened potatoes, as well as some sort of crystal. He picked it up and held it out to Jeb.
​
"What's this?"
​
"Candy."
​
"Candy?"
​
"Yeah. Candied sugar?" Jeb explained.
​
He knew of candied sweets. But he didn't ever see any in such a shade before, Ulrin thought as he stared at the dark crystal that seemed to suck in the light around it. He wasn't yet familiar with the wildlife of this world to know if what Jeb offered was altered or not. But he knew that eating this "candy" was a bad idea.
​
He made no secret in tossing away the candy and gestured to the rest of the food.
"How much can you offer?"
​
"How does a box of food for a box of tools sound?"
​
Ulrin grunted and drummed his dwarven fingers against the desk in thought for a moment before making a counter offer.
"A long term trade then. Eight crates o' food for five crate o' tools."
​
"Why not five for five or eight for eight?"
​
"It will take this much food just ta mine tha piss poor iron. Makin' it will require more work. If you don't care for quality then that's what you'll deal with." Ulrin declared.
​
"Five crates of food, bi-weekly, for five crates of tools delivered at the end of the week." Jeb countered.
​
Finally a good deal, Ulrin thought as he tapped away on the desk in thought. This deal was in their favor. They got a promise of food even before delivering their end of the deal. But why? He's worked with otherworldly beings enough to know that they rarely play something in your favor unless it benefited them in some way.
​
"What else do you want?" Ulrin asked with a questioning brow and an accusatory tone.
​
Jeb shifted and looked around before reaching over to the large band he spied earlier.
"How 'bout this?"
​
Ulrin cocked his brow in suspicion. That was it?
"That's it?"
​
"That's it. You get a steady shipment of food, a bundle of silk, and some gold pieces in exchange for some tools and a weddin' band." Jeb stated.
​
Ulrin drummed his fingers once again.
"Can you acquire more silk?"
​
Jeb scratched his beard.
"Not currently."
​
Or maybe ever, he thought as he had no intention of making a deal with Anna after everything. At least not so soon after their last dust up. Ulrin rumbled and grunted before looking between what was offered one last time. After a few minutes, he looked up at Jeb and stuck out his large hand.
"We have an accord."
​
Jeb shook the offered hand, and felt the same stinging feeling he felt before when he made a deal with the dwarf. Wonder what that's about, he thought. But he got what he wanted and got rid of stuff he didn't really lack either. Fish was plentiful in the river after so long of going unfished, and he could conjure the other stuff with no problems.
​
With a deal set and the promise of commerce, Jeb departed with his treasure. Intent on making today a very special one for a certain kobold.
​
[First] [Prev] [Next]

“The Holonets have named this rogue human The Pirate King," Captain Shlaye Bressik announced to the senators and law enforcement officials gathered in the Hall of Justice. "They have named him so because every attempt to capture him and his crew of miscreants has failed."
The blue-skinned Adani senator rose from her Grav chair and addressed Captain Shlaye. "This Pirate King of yours is terrorizing the Adanian shipping lanes and trade routes. A dozen short haulers and twice that many liners have been sacked in the past three months. If something isn't done soon to resolve this untenable situation, the grumbles from the Freighter Union about a general strike will become a reality. I don't have to tell you the far-reaching consequences of a shipping strike on the Federacy's economy."
"I understand, senator," Shlaye said, motioning with her hand tentacles for the good senator to be easy. "We are doing everything we can to put an end to this scourge, but you must understand, piracy is a new concept to the Federacy. We only recently learned of this practice from our contacts on Earth. It will take time for our policing systems to make the necessary adjustments."
"Best you hurry, captain. The whole of the Federacy has eyes on this Pirate debacle."
That really rankled many in the Halls of Justice, especially Shlaye. This so-called Pirate King evaded their hapless patrols with ease, turning every effort at capturing him into a comical farce. Shlaye's six eyes glittered with anger. This human was far too clever for their untutored attempts to apprehend him and his crew, galling as that was to admit. The Pirate King and his crew were as ghosts who struck at will, always emerging from the black where Federacy ships were not present to take their prize and vanish without a trace. That was the most humiliating part of the whole preposterous affair. A hard thing for anyone in her position to accept. Still, she did not believe they needed a new perspective as a certain council member had suggested. Not yet.
"It seems this rabble has outsmarted you at every turn, Captain Shlaye," another council member spoke, the leathery-skinned Julio representative. "Perhaps it's time to consider all your options, yes?"
"Call for help from the humans?" A loud basso bellowed from the back, stricken with indignant outrage at the mere suggestion of consulting the junior senator from the Federacy's newest member species. "The Federacy has existed since those talking primates were climbing down out of their trees. I think we can handle a single crew of these so-called pirates without begging for their help. Thank you very much."
Thunderous approval greeted her words.
"Piracy is a human convention," Captain Shlaye raised her voice to be heard over the shouting. "Something the galactic community has never dealt with until now. It will take time to build effective strategies and tactics to take down The Pirate King."
"Yes, yes you see?" Cramius from the Odellar system spoke up, a wizened old goat of a senator who forgot his name more often than not. "Never should have brought them into our civilized society, I said it! I said it then and I'll say it until my old bones are stardust! They were not ready. Much growing they have to do before being introduced to the wider galaxy. We should have waited!"
Shlaye pressed the glowing holo button on her podium, and a resounding gong split the air, cutting off the arguing before it could build steam and get out of hand. That was usual these days when talks inevitably went to The Pirate King and the troubles his crew was visiting upon the peoples of the Federacy. Everyone was on edge with no good answers, making for a volatile environment.
"We will deal with this rabble ourselves," Shlaye assured everyone. "We do not need human help. So far as we know, it is a single ship, no reason to call on their advice. What should they think if we can't handle a simple one-ship threat?" The notion was so absurd that Shlaye couldn't believe she'd had to voice it aloud.
"See that you do," Senator Woropaj called out, with others nodding vigorously in agreement. "Or we may be forced to reconsider your position, Captain."
Shlaye did not like the sound of that, though she had no time for a rebuttal. Again things degenerated into shouting matches and old feuds kindled in the eyes of ancient rivals. This conference was going nowhere.
She tilted back her scalp tentacles and sighed. The sooner they caught The Pirate King, the better for everyone.
Especially Shlaye.
𒐤
"Target in sight."
Kal Krason sat in the captain's chair with one booted leg thrown over its arm, a bit of dark chest hair showing where his pearl synth-satin shirt was unbuttoned, and a mischievous twinkle in his eye. Today was going to be a good day. Credits, baby. It was all about those credits. And maybe a good bourbon and a game of dice to kill some time between runs. He still couldn't believe most in this so-called Federacy had never played dice. It was too easy, and the credits piled up until they wised to his uncanny luck. Kal had always been lucky that way, cards, and dice, and with the ladies. A smirk ghosted across his lips, especially with the ladies.
"Any ships in sensor range?" He asked, idly munching on a Gold Nectar from the rain forests of Reggan V. "Federacy gunships or patrols, scout drones?"
"Nothing showing in the sector, captain," Trigg called from tactical. "She's barren as a nun's bedroom. Looks like today's gonna be easy pickings."
Kal finished his exotic apple with a final crunch and tossed the amber-colored core over his shoulder, ignoring the dull scuttle it made over the deck grating.
"Well, alright," he said, brushing his hands clean on his black Armorweave pants and straightening in the seat. "Let's go introduce ourselves to our soon-to-be benefactors."
The Onyx was a stealth cruiser fitted out for fast strikes and faster exits, though in a pinch, she could tangle with a heavy battle cruiser and come out the other end without being mauled. Puck's extensive aftermarket upgrades were state-of-the-art, some on the bleeding edge of current tech and years ahead of anything the Federacy had in its antiquated arsenal. She was his ship's lead engineer, the brains behind The Onyx's might. He recruited her from some Ivy league academy back on earth, brilliant, driven with a mischievous streak to rival his own. Without her gadgets and tinkering, The Onyx wouldn't be able to do half the things Hauke demanded of the former military cruiser.
Time to go to work.
Onyx slithered up silent as a ghost beside the small luxury liner, coupling to its docking port while Kal and his shock troops prepared to board. It was almost too easy the way these ships were utterly oblivious to the potential threats in the deep. Not that they would have seen the Onyx coming anyway. Her advanced stealth tech was second to none, better even than the stuff they were putting out of the Sol navy yards. Something Puck had come up with that made Kal’s head dizzy when she tried to explain how it works.
A soft electronic whirring groan issued from the airlock door as the computer made final adjustments, and Hauke felt a familiar fiery surge in his veins, a welcome friend on the coming journey. The ship's Breacher went to work hacking the door's security measures. It took her less than thirty seconds, and they were inside.
Kal led his strike crew down the wide carpeted corridor with its luxurious crystal chandeliers and gilded wall hangings. Vast holo screens built into the shimmering white walls showed pristine crystal waters and white sandy beaches in the distance, and a low, soothing melody hummed in the air, broken occasionally by the crying of gulls. Paradise in space.
Gasps greeted his team at a wide intersection where the passenger cabins began. Objects thudded to the carpet as wide-eyed people goggled at Kal and his crew moving at them in a crouch, all kitted out in their midnight tactical gear with pulse rifles raised and ready.
"You," Kal pointed his rifle at them. "Hands up. Start walking."
Members of his team went about gathering startled passengers and crew members. It didn't take long to round everyone up, including those below deck in the galley or other compartments throughout the ship, and chivvy them to the bridge.
"Alright, folks," Kal flashed his trademark smile, gazing around at the crowd of curious passengers. Strange as it was, none seemed scared or even nervous. If anything, they were…excited, babbling amongst themselves over each other's holos. Not at all what he had experienced in the past.
Feora leaned in and whispered, "Something seem off about this ship to you? About its passengers, I mean?"
"Yea," he said, he'd noticed something different about these people back in the hallways. They weren't acting normal. Usually, folks begged, cried, and whimpered for their lives, which was nonsense. Kal and his crew were not monsters. They had no intention of hurting anyone. Not unless forced. They were simply out to make a living in their chosen profession. "Forget it. Let's focus on snatching everything worth anything and get the hell out of here. I don't like this shit." How the passengers were looking at him was starting to make his skin creep, almost like they knew him personally.
"Alright, quiet down," Kal lifted his voice to be heard over the babble. "You know the drill, folks." His eyes fell upon a particularly lovely Thressian and, out of nothing less than habit, flashed his boyish smile and winked at her. "Ready your transfer cubes. If you have jewels, gems, or precious metals, my colleague there will relieve you of your burdens."
Trigg was moving through the crowd with a big leather bag in one hand and a cube transfer interface in the other, collecting valuables and taking half the balance of everyone's accounts. Only half. No reason to be greedy. Besides, they weren't in the business of leaving people destitute.
Whispers from the passengers continued to trickle to Kal’s ears, and he found it increasingly difficult to ignore their strange, admiring stares.
"Thats him, I'm sure of it."
"Much better looking in person…"
"...some kind of human king I heard…."
His confusion deepened when a voice suddenly cried out from the crowd, "You're The Pirate King!" And the tiny hairs on the back of his neck stood up.
Pirate King?
Kal blinked, shifted his feet, exchanged a puzzled look with Feora, then turned back to the crowd.
"Who?"
"Yeah it's all over the Holonet," a handsome lad out of the Obellar system with skin the color of a fire ruby called out, flashing Kal a glimpse of an article on a glowing holoscreen. "You're famous, a dashing rogue. The Pirate King they are calling you. Says here you elude the Federacy's every attempt at capture. What's it like? How do you become a pirate?"
"I don't care if they say you're a scoundrel," a painfully screechy voice rode over the rising murmur. "I love you!"
What the shit? Had they jumped into some alternate reality or something? This was getting out of hand.
Kal felt sweat bead his brow. The crowd was beginning to press in close with rising excitement, and he didn't like it one bit.
He looked to Feora, Trigg, and the rest of his crew and made a circling gesture with his first two fingers. "Time to wrap this up. Now. Got everything, Trigg?"
"Aye, that I do, captain," the big man flashed a grin that nearly glowed against his ebon skin.
"Back to The Onyx then, rapido. If you know what I'm saying." Kal couldn't get away from these bizarre people fast enough. Pirate King? What the hell?
Back on the Onyx, Puck pulled the Narrowcasts from around the system, and Kal was shocked at what she found.
His face was everywhere, on every Newsnet in the Federacy.
Apparently, he and his crew were something of a big deal. Celebrity outlaws. The authorities were stumbling about like two blind men trying to slap each other, all while the Newsnets glorified Kal and his crew as dashing rogues out to pull down the wealthy elite and rain their credits down upon the poor. People everywhere were smitten with the danger and romance the media was spinning.
Well, they got one thing wrong: I'm not giving up any credits!
Kal frowned down at the bluish glow of his grinning mug rotating on the holo. This was not good. His face was plastered everywhere, and there was no containing this, no hiding from it. Not now. And they didn't even use a good shot of him. No three-dimensional composite holo that showed his best features. What a crock.
Kal had set out to be rich and anonymous, perhaps even notorious. He would retire to a paradise world with credits spilling out of his pockets. But not some famous outlaw recognized in every home across the galaxy. That was a disaster for any man of his profession. He was fucked.
Fucked!
Wait, think Kal. You just have to think this out. This wasn't a total disaster. Not if his luck held.
"Well, we had a good run, boss," Feora said, clapping Kal on the back while looking at the holo over his shoulder. "Only a matter of time before they get lucky and corner us now." She straightened and started to walk away but glanced back over her shoulder. "I hear fencing high end kit out of the Ryari system rakes in the credits. Maybe a shift in our operation? Something on the ground?"
Kal knew she was right; it was only a matter of time before Federacy hunters got lucky. But that wasn't going to be today. Or any day soon if he had his way. If his luck held.
How could he walk away from what he loved?
He shook his head and smiled his crooked smile. "Never took you for a quitter, Fey. The fun's just getting started. Might even be a challenge now."
Feora shook her head and snorted.
"Set course for the Arenel system, Mendia," he said to the stout woman sitting at the conn. "Untapped waters there I hear. Full of fat fish waiting to be plucked. And I mean for us to have our share."
Mendia nodded. "Yes, captain."
Feora returned his roguish grin. "In to the end?"
Kal’s smile was something a wolf would have recognized.
"In to the end."

Title: Understanding Fentanyl: Uses, Risks, and Controversies
Introduction: Fentanyl, a potent synthetic opioid, has gained significant attention in recent years due to its role in the opioid epidemic. This article aims to provide a comprehensive overview of fentanyl, including its medical uses, associated risks, and the controversies surrounding its widespread misuse.
Medical Uses: Originally developed for managing severe pain, especially in cancer patients, fentanyl is an analgesic that is 50 to 100 times more potent than morphine. It is commonly used in medical settings for pain management during surgeries, chronic pain conditions, and palliative care.
Risk Factors: While fentanyl is effective in controlling pain when administered under medical supervision, its misuse poses serious health risks. The drug's high potency increases the likelihood of overdose, leading to respiratory depression and, in extreme cases, death. Illicitly manufactured fentanyl, often mixed with other substances, has been a major contributor to the rising number of opioid-related deaths.
Controversies and Illicit Use: The illicit use of fentanyl has sparked controversy and public health concerns. The drug is often clandestinely produced and added to other drugs, such as heroin or cocaine, without the user's knowledge. This has resulted in a surge in overdoses, as individuals may unintentionally consume lethal doses of the opioid.
Law Enforcement and Regulation: Governments and law enforcement agencies worldwide are grappling with the challenges posed by the illicit production and distribution of fentanyl. Efforts to regulate its manufacturing and distribution are ongoing, with stricter controls in place to prevent diversion into illegal channels.
Treatment and Harm Reduction: Addressing the fentanyl crisis requires a multi-faceted approach, including expanded access to addiction treatment, harm reduction strategies, and public awareness campaigns. Naloxone, an opioid receptor antagonist, has proven effective in reversing opioid overdoses and is increasingly available to first responders and the general public.
Conclusion: Fentanyl, with its remarkable pain-relieving properties, has become a double-edged sword in the realm of healthcare. While it serves a crucial role in medical settings, its misuse poses severe risks to public health. Efforts to combat the opioid epidemic must focus on education, regulation, and treatment to strike a balance between managing pain effectively and preventing the tragic consequences of its illicit use.
Narcan, also known by its generic name naloxone, is a medication used to rapidly reverse opioid overdose. It works by binding to the same receptors in the brain that opioids target, effectively reversing the life-threatening effects of opioid toxicity. Narcan is commonly administered in emergency situations where an individual is experiencing respiratory depression or unconsciousness due to opioid overdose.
Emergency responders, healthcare professionals, and even some non-professionals, such as family members of individuals at risk of opioid overdose, may carry naloxone. The medication is available in various forms, including nasal sprays and injectable formulations, making it accessible for different situations.
The prompt administration of Narcan can restore normal breathing and consciousness, providing crucial time for the affected person to receive further medical attention. It is an essential tool in harm reduction strategies aimed at preventing opioid-related deaths and is a key component of public health initiatives addressing the opioid epidemic.
Suboxone is a prescription medication used in the treatment of opioid dependence and addiction. It is a combination of two active ingredients: buprenorphine and naloxone.

1. Buprenorphine: This is a partial opioid agonist, meaning it binds to the same receptors in the brain that opioids bind to but with less intensity. It helps to reduce cravings and withdrawal symptoms, allowing individuals in recovery to better manage their addiction.
   
2. Naloxone: Naloxone is an opioid receptor antagonist, which means it blocks the effects of opioids. When taken as directed, naloxone remains largely inactive. However, if someone were to misuse Suboxone by injecting it, the naloxone component can counteract the opioid effects, reducing the risk of misuse.
   

Suboxone is often prescribed as part of medication-assisted treatment (MAT), a comprehensive approach to opioid addiction that includes counseling, therapy, and support services. It can be used in the detoxification phase as well as for long-term maintenance therapy. The goal of Suboxone treatment is to help individuals gradually reduce their dependence on opioids, manage cravings, and improve their overall quality of life during recovery.
It's important to note that Suboxone should only be used under the supervision of a qualified healthcare professional, as improper use or abrupt discontinuation can lead to withdrawal symptoms or other complications.
Precipitated withdrawal refers to the accelerated onset of withdrawal symptoms, often more severe than typical, when an opioid antagonist is introduced to the body. This occurs because the antagonist displaces the opioid from receptors, leading to a sudden and intense withdrawal reaction.
For example, if someone is currently dependent on opioids and receives a medication like naloxone or naltrexone, which are opioid antagonists, it can rapidly trigger withdrawal symptoms. This is a safety mechanism, as these medications are often used to reverse opioid overdose or as part of addiction treatment.
The term is commonly associated with medication-assisted treatment for opioid use disorder, where medications like buprenorphine (a partial opioid agonist) are used. If buprenorphine is administered before other full opioids have cleared from the system, it can displace those opioids from receptors, leading to precipitated withdrawal. This is why healthcare providers carefully time the initiation of medications like buprenorphine to avoid this intensified withdrawal reaction.
Understanding the potential for precipitated withdrawal is crucial in the context of addiction treatment to ensure safe and effective transitions between medications and to minimize discomfort for individuals in recovery.
Using Suboxone involves adherence to a specific treatment plan under the guidance of a qualified healthcare professional. Here are some key aspects related to the use of Suboxone:

1. Prescription and Medical Supervision: Suboxone is a prescription medication, and its use should be initiated and supervised by a qualified healthcare provider, typically in the context of medication-assisted treatment (MAT) for opioid use disorder.
   
2. Dosage: The healthcare provider will determine the appropriate dosage based on the individual's specific needs and response to the medication. It's essential to follow the prescribed dosage and not adjust it without consulting the healthcare provider.
   
3. Administration: Suboxone is often administered sublingually, meaning it is placed under the tongue and allowed to dissolve. This method allows for the absorption of the medication into the bloodstream.
   
4. Timing: The timing of Suboxone administration is crucial. It is often started when the individual is in a mild to moderate state of withdrawal to reduce the risk of precipitated withdrawal. The healthcare provider will provide guidance on the appropriate timing.
   
5. Regular Monitoring: During Suboxone treatment, individuals are regularly monitored by healthcare professionals to assess progress, manage side effects, and adjust the treatment plan as needed.
   
6. Counseling and Support: Suboxone is typically part of a comprehensive treatment plan that includes counseling, therapy, and support services. This holistic approach addresses both the physical and psychological aspects of opioid addiction.
   
7. Gradual Tapering: Depending on the treatment plan, there may be a gradual tapering of Suboxone dosage as the individual progresses in their recovery. Tapering is done under medical supervision to minimize withdrawal symptoms.
   
8. Avoiding Other Opioids: It's crucial to avoid the use of other opioids while taking Suboxone. Combining opioids can lead to dangerous interactions and diminish the effectiveness of the treatment.
   
9. Side Effects and Reporting: Like any medication, Suboxone may have side effects. Common side effects include headache, nausea, and constipation. Any unusual or severe side effects should be promptly reported to the healthcare provider.
   
10. Pregnancy Considerations: If an individual is pregnant or planning to become pregnant, it's important to discuss this with the healthcare provider, as the use of Suboxone during pregnancy requires careful consideration.
    

Always follow the guidance of your healthcare provider and inform them of any concerns or changes in your condition during Suboxone treatment. Successful recovery often involves a combination of medication, counseling, and support tailored to individual needs.
Suboxone, when used as prescribed under the supervision of a healthcare professional as part of medication-assisted treatment (MAT) for opioid use disorder, has a lower potential for abuse and addiction compared to full opioid agonists. This is because Suboxone contains buprenorphine, a partial opioid agonist, which has a ceiling effect on its opioid effects.
Buprenorphine's partial agonist properties mean that it activates opioid receptors in the brain to a lesser extent than full agonists like heroin or oxycodone. As a result, the euphoria and respiratory depression associated with opioid abuse are less pronounced with buprenorphine.
However, it's essential to emphasize that any medication, including Suboxone, should be taken exactly as prescribed by a healthcare professional. Misuse, such as taking larger doses or combining Suboxone with other substances, can increase the risk of dependence or addiction.
Abruptly stopping Suboxone can lead to withdrawal symptoms, emphasizing the importance of a gradual tapering plan under medical supervision when discontinuing the medication. It's crucial for individuals using Suboxone to work closely with their healthcare provider to ensure proper management of their opioid use disorder and to address any concerns or side effects during the course of treatment.
Withdrawal symptoms from Suboxone, or buprenorphine (the active ingredient in Suboxone), can occur when someone who has been using the medication for an extended period stops taking it abruptly. It's important to note that withdrawal symptoms can vary in intensity and duration based on factors such as the individual's overall health, the duration of Suboxone use, and the dosage.
Common withdrawal symptoms from Suboxone may include:

1. Nausea and vomiting
2. Diarrhea
3. Muscle aches and pains
4. Sweating
5. Insomnia or sleep disturbances
6. Anxiety
7. Irritability
8. Runny nose and teary eyes
9. Goosebumps (piloerection)
10. Dilated pupils

It's important to distinguish between withdrawal symptoms and precipitated withdrawal. Precipitated withdrawal can occur if someone takes Suboxone too soon after using a full opioid agonist, leading to a more rapid and intense onset of withdrawal symptoms.
Withdrawal from Suboxone is generally considered less severe than withdrawal from full opioid agonists, and the symptoms tend to peak within the first 72 hours after discontinuation. However, the duration and severity can vary from person to person.
If an individual is considering stopping Suboxone or adjusting their dosage, it's crucial to do so under the guidance of a healthcare professional. Tapering the medication gradually, rather than stopping abruptly, can help minimize withdrawal symptoms and increase the chances of a successful transition to recovery. Seeking support from healthcare providers, counselors, and support groups is essential during this process.
Kratom is a tropical tree native to Southeast Asia, specifically in countries like Thailand, Malaysia, Indonesia, Papua New Guinea, and Myanmar. The leaves of the Kratom tree have been traditionally used for various purposes, including as a stimulant, a pain reliever, and to manage opioid withdrawal symptoms.
The active compounds in Kratom, called alkaloids, interact with opioid receptors in the brain, producing effects that can vary depending on the strain and dosage. These effects can include:

1. Stimulation: At lower doses, Kratom may act as a stimulant, promoting increased energy, alertness, and sociability.
   
2. Sedation: At higher doses, Kratom may have sedative effects, leading to relaxation and pain relief.
   
3. Pain Relief: Kratom has been used traditionally for its analgesic properties, and some people use it as a natural remedy for pain.
   
4. Mood Enhancement: Some users report improved mood and reduced anxiety after consuming Kratom.
   

However, it's important to note that Kratom is not regulated by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA), and its safety and effectiveness for various uses have not been clinically proven. There are potential risks associated with Kratom use, including dependence, addiction, and adverse effects such as nausea, constipation, and increased heart rate.
Due to these concerns, Kratom has been a subject of regulatory scrutiny in various countries, with some regions imposing restrictions or outright bans on its sale and use. It is essential for individuals to exercise caution, seek reliable information, and consult with healthcare professionals before considering the use of Kratom, especially for medicinal purposes or to manage opioid withdrawal.
Methadone is a synthetic opioid medication used primarily in the treatment of opioid dependence, particularly in the context of medication-assisted treatment (MAT). It is a long-acting opioid agonist, meaning it activates the same opioid receptors in the brain that other opioids, like heroin or morphine, do.
Key points about Methadone include:

1. Opioid Dependence Treatment: Methadone is often used as a maintenance medication to help individuals reduce or quit the use of illicit opioids. It helps by reducing cravings and withdrawal symptoms.
   
2. Long-Lasting Effect: One significant advantage of methadone is its long duration of action. A single daily dose can help stabilize individuals, preventing the highs and lows associated with short-acting opioids.
   
3. Supervised Administration: In some cases, methadone is provided through supervised administration in specialized clinics to ensure proper use and minimize the risk of diversion.
   
4. Tolerance and Dependence: Like other opioids, individuals using methadone can develop tolerance and dependence. Therefore, the dosage needs to be carefully managed, and discontinuation should be done gradually under medical supervision.
   
5. Reduction of Illicit Drug Use: When used as part of a comprehensive treatment plan, methadone has been shown to reduce illicit opioid use, lower the risk of overdose, and improve overall health outcomes.
   
6. Potential Side Effects: Methadone can have side effects, including constipation, sweating, drowsiness, and changes in libido. It's important for individuals to report any adverse effects to their healthcare provider.
   
7. Regulated Use: The use of methadone is tightly regulated, and it is typically dispensed through specialized clinics or healthcare providers who are authorized to prescribe it for opioid use disorder treatment.
   

Methadone treatment is part of a broader approach that often includes counseling, therapy, and support services. It has been a valuable tool in harm reduction strategies aimed at addressing the opioid epidemic and helping individuals achieve and maintain recovery.
Narcotics Anonymous (NA) is a 12-step program that provides support for individuals recovering from addiction, particularly those struggling with substance abuse issues. It is important to note that NA, like other 12-step programs, does not have an official stance or opinion on specific medical treatments, including medication-assisted treatment (MAT) for withdrawal.
The approach to medication assistance in withdrawal can vary among individuals within the NA community. Some may find success and support in MAT, while others may choose alternative methods or prefer an abstinence-based approach. NA encourages individuals to share their experiences, strength, and hope, but it does not dictate specific treatment choices.
The primary focus of NA is on mutual support, fellowship, and following the 12-step principles, which include admitting powerlessness over addiction, seeking spiritual awakening, and helping others in recovery. Members of NA are encouraged to respect each other's choices and paths to recovery.
It's essential for individuals seeking support for addiction to find a treatment plan that aligns with their needs and values. Consulting with healthcare professionals, attending support groups, and considering various treatment options can be part of a comprehensive approach to recovery.
SMART Recovery (Self-Management and Recovery Training) is a science-based, secular alternative to traditional 12-step programs like Narcotics Anonymous. SMART Recovery emphasizes self-empowerment and utilizes evidence-based techniques to support individuals in overcoming addiction.
Regarding Medication-Assisted Treatment (MAT), SMART Recovery takes a neutral stance. The program acknowledges that MAT, when prescribed and monitored by healthcare professionals, can be a valid and effective part of a comprehensive approach to addiction treatment. SMART Recovery recognizes that different individuals may have unique needs, and treatment plans should be tailored to the individual's circumstances.
SMART Recovery's focus is on teaching self-reliance, coping skills, and strategies for managing urges and behaviors associated with addiction. The program encourages participants to make informed decisions about their recovery, including the consideration of medications that may be prescribed by healthcare providers.
Ultimately, SMART Recovery emphasizes a holistic and individualized approach to recovery, allowing participants to choose the methods and tools that best suit their needs and align with their values. This includes being open to the potential benefits of MAT for some individuals as part of their overall recovery plan.
Several treatment modalities are available for individuals struggling with opioid use disorder. The most effective approach often involves a combination of different strategies. Here are some key treatment modalities for opioid addiction:

1. Medication-Assisted Treatment (MAT): MAT involves the use of medications, such as methadone, buprenorphine (Suboxone), and naltrexone, to help manage cravings, reduce withdrawal symptoms, and support recovery. These medications are often used in combination with counseling and therapy.
   
2. Counseling and Behavioral Therapies: Various forms of counseling and behavioral therapies are crucial components of opioid addiction treatment. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), contingency management, motivational enhancement therapy, and dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) are among the approaches used to address the psychological aspects of addiction and help individuals develop coping skills.
   
3. Support Groups and 12-Step Programs: Participating in support groups like Narcotics Anonymous (NA) or 12-step programs can provide valuable peer support, encouragement, and a sense of community for individuals in recovery.
   
4. Detoxification Programs: Medically supervised detoxification programs help individuals safely manage the acute withdrawal symptoms associated with stopping opioid use. These programs often serve as the initial phase of treatment.
   
5. Residential or Inpatient Treatment: Inpatient treatment programs provide a structured and supportive environment for individuals to focus on recovery. These programs may include a combination of medical supervision, counseling, and therapeutic activities.
   
6. Outpatient Treatment: Outpatient programs allow individuals to receive treatment while living at home. This flexibility can be beneficial for those with work or family commitments. Outpatient treatment often includes counseling, therapy, and medication management.
   
7. Holistic and Alternative Therapies: Some individuals find benefit from holistic approaches, such as acupuncture, yoga, meditation, or mindfulness practices. These can complement traditional treatment modalities and contribute to overall well-being.
   
8. Peer Recovery Support Services: Peer recovery support services involve individuals with lived experience in recovery providing support, guidance, and encouragement to others going through similar challenges.
   

The most effective treatment plans are often individualized, taking into account the specific needs, preferences, and circumstances of each person. Collaborating with healthcare professionals to develop a comprehensive and tailored approach can significantly enhance the chances of successful recovery from opioid addiction.
The withdrawal timeline for fentanyl, a potent synthetic opioid, can vary among individuals based on factors such as the duration and intensity of use, individual metabolism, and overall health. Fentanyl withdrawal symptoms typically start shortly after the last dose and follow a general timeline:

1. Early Symptoms (Within a few hours): Early withdrawal symptoms may include anxiety, restlessness, sweating, and increased heart rate. Individuals may also experience muscle aches and insomnia.
   
2. Peak Intensity (24-72 hours): Withdrawal symptoms usually peak within the first 24 to 72 hours after discontinuing fentanyl. During this time, individuals may experience more intense symptoms such as nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, abdominal cramps, dilated pupils, and flu-like symptoms.
   
3. Subsiding Symptoms (5-7 days): The most acute withdrawal symptoms generally begin to subside within about five to seven days. However, some symptoms, such as insomnia, anxiety, and mood swings, may persist for a more extended period.
   
4. Post-Acute Withdrawal Syndrome (PAWS): Some individuals may experience a more prolonged period of withdrawal symptoms known as post-acute withdrawal syndrome (PAWS). This can include lingering psychological symptoms such as anxiety, depression, irritability, and difficulty concentrating. PAWS can persist for weeks or even months.
   

It's crucial to note that fentanyl withdrawal can be challenging, and seeking professional help is recommended to manage symptoms safely and effectively. Medical supervision can provide support through the detoxification process, and healthcare professionals may use medications to alleviate specific withdrawal symptoms and improve the overall comfort of the individual.
The withdrawal process is highly individual, and some individuals may find additional support through counseling, therapy, and participation in support groups to address the psychological aspects of recovery. Always consult with healthcare professionals for guidance on the safest and most effective approach to fentanyl withdrawal.
Xylazine is a veterinary sedative and analgesic medication. It belongs to the class of drugs known as alpha-2 adrenergic agonists. While it is primarily intended for veterinary use, xylazine has been misused in some cases for recreational purposes, particularly in combination with other substances.
In veterinary medicine, xylazine is commonly used as a sedative and muscle relaxant for various procedures, including surgery and diagnostic imaging. It is often administered to calm and immobilize animals.
However, the use of xylazine outside of veterinary settings, especially when combined with other drugs, can pose serious health risks. Misuse of xylazine has been associated with adverse effects, including respiratory depression, cardiovascular issues, and central nervous system depression.
It's important to emphasize that the use of xylazine for recreational purposes is highly dangerous and illegal. The drug is not intended for human consumption, and its effects can be unpredictable and potentially life-threatening.
If you have concerns about substance use or encounter situations involving illicit drugs, it is crucial to seek help from healthcare professionals, addiction specialists, or local support services. Misuse of veterinary drugs or any substances not prescribed for human use can have severe consequences and should be avoided.
PAWS stands for Post-Acute Withdrawal Syndrome. It refers to a set of prolonged withdrawal symptoms that some individuals may experience after the acute phase of withdrawal from substances like opioids, benzodiazepines, or alcohol. PAWS is not limited to a specific substance and can occur with various drugs.
These symptoms are generally more subtle than the acute withdrawal symptoms but can persist for weeks, months, or, in some cases, years after discontinuing substance use. PAWS can vary widely among individuals and may include symptoms such as:

1. Mood swings
2. Anxiety
3. Irritability
4. Insomnia
5. Fatigue
6. Difficulty concentrating
7. Memory problems
8. Reduced impulse control
9. Cravings for the substance

PAWS can be challenging for individuals in recovery, as these lingering symptoms may contribute to relapse if not effectively managed. Supportive interventions, such as counseling, therapy, and participation in support groups, can be beneficial for individuals experiencing PAWS. Healthy lifestyle choices, including regular exercise, proper nutrition, and adequate sleep, may also contribute to the overall well-being of those in recovery.
It's important to note that PAWS is not experienced by everyone in recovery, and its severity and duration can vary. Seeking guidance from healthcare professionals or addiction specialists can assist individuals in managing PAWS and maintaining long-term recovery.
Quitting substance use "cold turkey" involves stopping the use of a substance abruptly without tapering or gradually reducing the dosage. It's important to note that quitting cold turkey can be challenging, and the level of difficulty varies depending on the substance, the duration and intensity of use, and individual factors.
If you're considering quitting a substance cold turkey, here are some general recommendations:

1. Seek Professional Guidance: Before making the decision to quit cold turkey, it's advisable to consult with a healthcare professional or addiction specialist. They can provide guidance based on your specific situation, assess potential risks, and offer support.
   
2. Create a Support System: Inform friends, family, or a support network about your decision to quit. Having a support system in place can provide encouragement, understanding, and assistance during challenging times.
   
3. Understand Withdrawal Symptoms: Be aware of potential withdrawal symptoms associated with quitting the substance cold turkey. Withdrawal symptoms can vary depending on the substance but may include anxiety, irritability, insomnia, and other physical or psychological effects.
   
4. Stay Hydrated and Nourished: Maintaining proper hydration and nutrition is crucial during the quitting process. Stay hydrated by drinking water and consuming a balanced diet to support your overall well-being.
   
5. Exercise: Engage in regular physical activity. Exercise can help alleviate stress, improve mood, and contribute to your overall physical and mental health.
   
6. Consider Professional Treatment: Depending on the substance and the severity of dependence, professional treatment options, such as inpatient or outpatient programs, may be beneficial. Medical supervision can assist in managing withdrawal symptoms and ensuring safety.
   
7. Therapy and Counseling: Consider participating in therapy or counseling to address the underlying factors contributing to substance use and to develop coping strategies for a successful recovery.
   
8. Plan for Triggers: Identify situations, environments, or emotions that may trigger the urge to use the substance. Develop a plan to cope with these triggers without resorting to substance use.
   

It's essential to approach quitting any substance with a comprehensive strategy, and individual circumstances vary. Seeking professional advice ensures that you make informed decisions about the best approach for your specific situation. If you are experiencing severe withdrawal symptoms or have concerns about quitting cold turkey, it is crucial to consult with a healthcare professional for guidance and support.
Tapering refers to the gradual reduction of the dosage of a substance, typically a medication or a drug, over a specific period. Tapering is commonly used in the context of addiction treatment, where it involves slowly decreasing the amount of a substance to manage withdrawal symptoms and minimize the risks associated with abrupt discontinuation.
Key points about tapering include:

1. Medication-Assisted Treatment (MAT): Tapering is often part of medication-assisted treatment for substance use disorders. For example, individuals dependent on opioids might undergo a gradual tapering of medications like methadone or buprenorphine.
   
2. Reducing Dependence: Tapering is employed to reduce physical dependence on a substance by allowing the body to adjust to lower levels gradually. This helps minimize the severity of withdrawal symptoms.
   
3. Individualized Approach: Tapering plans are typically individualized based on factors such as the substance used, the duration and intensity of use, and the individual's overall health. Healthcare professionals design tapering schedules to meet the specific needs of each person.
   
4. Supervised Tapering: Tapering is ideally done under the supervision of a healthcare professional to ensure safety and effectiveness. This is particularly important in cases where abrupt discontinuation could lead to severe withdrawal symptoms or complications.
   
5. Psychological Support: Tapering is not only about physical adjustments but also addresses psychological aspects of dependence. It provides individuals with an opportunity to develop coping skills and strategies for managing life without reliance on the substance.
   
6. Preventing Relapse: Gradual tapering can help reduce the risk of relapse by easing the transition to complete abstinence. It gives individuals the time and support needed to adjust to life without the substance.
   

Tapering is a careful and structured process that should be guided by healthcare professionals. Abruptly stopping certain substances can lead to severe withdrawal symptoms and potential health risks. Seeking professional advice and support is crucial for a safe and successful tapering process, whether it's part of addiction treatment or the discontinuation of a prescribed medication.
Engaging in activities during withdrawal can help distract from symptoms, provide a sense of accomplishment, and contribute to overall well-being. Here are some ideas for keeping busy during withdrawal:

1. Reading: Escape into a good book or explore topics of interest to keep your mind occupied.
   
2. Movies or TV Shows: Watch movies or binge-watch a TV series to pass the time. Choose lighthearted or inspirational content.
   
3. Exercise: Engage in gentle exercises like walking, yoga, or stretching. Exercise can help improve mood and alleviate some withdrawal symptoms.
   
4. Creative Hobbies: Explore creative outlets such as drawing, painting, writing, or playing a musical instrument.
   
5. Mindfulness and Meditation: Practice mindfulness or meditation techniques to calm the mind and reduce stress.
   
6. Gardening: Spend time outdoors, tending to a garden or plants. Nature can have a positive impact on mood.
   
7. Puzzle Games: Solve puzzles, play Sudoku, or engage in other mentally stimulating games.
   
8. Listening to Music or Podcasts: Create playlists of your favorite music or listen to podcasts on topics of interest.
   
9. Cooking or Baking: Experiment with new recipes and treat yourself to nourishing meals.
   
10. Journaling: Write down your thoughts and feelings. Keeping a journal can be therapeutic during withdrawal.
    
11. Educational Courses: Take online courses or watch educational videos on platforms like Coursera or Khan Academy.
    
12. Board Games or Card Games: Play board games or cards with friends or family for some social interaction.
    
13. Self-Care Activities: Take relaxing baths, practice skincare routines, or indulge in other self-care activities to nurture your well-being.
    
14. Volunteering: If possible, consider volunteering for a cause you're passionate about. Helping others can be rewarding.
    
15. Stay Connected: Reach out to friends and family for support. Having a support system is crucial during withdrawal.
    

It's important to choose activities that align with your interests and energy levels. Remember that withdrawal is a challenging time, and it's okay to prioritize self-care. If symptoms become severe or unmanageable, seeking professional help is recommended.

I had major surgery and was on dilaudid and oxycodone at the hospital. They sent me home with oxycodone 10mg IR. After one refill I was cut off and I said "no big deal, I should be healed soon." Well, many months later and I'm basically the same.
I am now in pain management and was put on Percocet. Doc said it's the same as I was getting, but with Tylenol "so it's actually better." Well these things don't do anything for me. She gave me 5s at first and then the second visit I said they didn't help, so she bumped them to 10s. I'm sure if I took 5-6 of them they light help but I don't feel like I should be doing that. I asked her if it was possible they didn't affect me the same and she said "no it's the same drug." Also, these seem to make me pretty nauseous whereas the other ones didn't at all. I get almost no pain relief, but lots of nausea. It's a no-win.
I have never been in PM but I know that it's a very delicate situation and I don't know how to advocate for myself without raising some sort of flag. Basically, I don't know how to talk to this doctor as she's already been a bit dismissive. Any advice would help. Thanks.

Need advice
Hello, I believe my boyfriend is using harsh drugs and I need help in knowing what to do.
He has been an alcoholic for several years and in and out of rehab before but something has shifted recently and I can just tell something is different and it’s not just alcohol. Of course he denies everything and says he only drinks wine but it’s just simply not true and he’s so good at lying so whenever I bring it up I just always feel gaslight.
I started finding empty bottles of travel size hand sanitizer all over my house. Like at least 10 bottles, they are completely empty and washed out. Is this what he is picking his drugs up in? That’s the only thing that makes sense to me.
He is constantly sick and has nose bleeds at least once a week which is just so weird to me because he never had them before chronically like this and now all the sudden we will be just sitting and talking and his nose will bleed. I asked him if he’s been snorting anything and he says no.
He’s starting to be really paranoid that someone is after him. He will have these crazy spells where he just flies off the handle at a moments notice and it’s actually really scary to witness.
Ever since we’ve been dating he says that he cannot use the bathroom in our house, I thought it was just some type of quirk at first but he will literally drive to a grocery store to use the restroom instead of using the one at our home. I track his phone and he does actually go to our local grocery store but is this where he’s meeting someone?
And lastly I noticed that he had used my vape and there was this white substance inside it. It looked like sugar or salt but I never noticed it before, did he put drugs in my vape to smoke it? When I noticed it he was in rehab for alcohol so I didn’t ask him about it and just threw it away.
I guess I’m just trying to figure out what I’m supposed to do. Our relationship is basically over, I can’t do it anymore but I’m tired of being left with all the unanswered questions. How come it’s taken me so long to notice this stuff, I feel so stupid.
Any advice would really help.

Hey everyone!
My doctor recently started me on a fentanyl patch to get me off of oxycodone. I have no colon so the thought was that I wasn’t fully digesting the medicine very well, so we thought maybe a patch would work better to get the medicine in my body.
I took my first patch yesterday around 12:15ish. By the evening I was in so much pain I could barely move. But it was weird. I could tell there was a narcotic in my body because I wasn’t feeling any craving for an oxy dose. Now, I know it takes about 24 hours for any pain relief to kick in, but it definitely felt like there was medicine in my body.
To make matters worse, I spiked a really high fever last night - 103.2. I took some fever reducers and it kinda helped, but I woke up this morning still burning up AND my arm, where I’d put the patch, was very sore almost like I’d gotten a flu shot there. I took the patch off a few minutes ago and washed the area because it seemed to me like I was having some kind of allergic reaction.
I’ve called my doctor and left a message, but they don’t open for another hour or so. My breathing and heart rate are fine, but my blood pressure is a little low. I have medicine for that so I took an extra blood pressure pill (which I am allowed to do). I took my first blood pressure pill about an hour ago at my normal time and the second one just now so we’ll see how that goes.
My question may sound stupid, but I’m wondering if I need to go to the ER? I have been sick for years - I have six autoimmune disorders which is really rare. Most people only have 2 or 3 or so I’m told. Anyway, that means that the ER calls me a “frequent flyer.” They all know my name. They all know my history. Most times I go in, there is an actual issue, but there have been a few times when it turns out that nothing is wrong and depending on which nurses/doctors I get, sometimes they lecture me about wasting their time. So I don’t want to go in if I don’t absolutely have to.
Any advice? TIA!

I worked with a friend for around 6 years. The relationship slowly deteriorated as I became aware we started the business for different reasons. He was the outright owner and I was entitled to a cut of the profits, so he has the final say, but I had a heavy hand in the planning (even writing up the business plan). I wanted to make a difference by creating a community hub. He wanted to drink and do cocaine.
For a number of those years I was seemingly the only one who cared if the business survived and it felt like that was exploited. The more hard work I put in, the more I'd receive resistance. Any mention of trying to change or improve things (like food hygiene) was met with a defensive or dismissive attitude ("I don't get what the problem is" would be a classic response).
Anyway, then comes COVID. This was a hospitality business, so we were closed for a while. This lead to him showing his true colours. He's always been a bit of a conspiracy theorists, but this just got crazy and he became paranoid that we were taking money from the business (he decided to top up our furlough from 80% to 100%) without working for it. Even though on numerous occasions we went in to clean and do building work.
Then comes reopen and now he's blind drunk and deep into cocaine use every single shift. He's customer facing, it's his company and he was actively shitting all over it while the rest of us kept it going. I was empathetic to him, even asking him to take time off or to speak to a professional. All met with "no I'm fine".
I'm not a stranger to mental health issues and I know a lot of his drink and drug issues relate to the loss of his father when he was in his late teens, but we were friends for a long time before the business, so all this was known and we helped each other.
After the relationship broke down, there was no fixing it and me more than him didn't want it fixed. I still don't want to fix it, but I am still struggling with the loss and have a lot of mixed feelings of anger and resentment and jealousy and guilt.
I don't feel guilty for quitting. I am glad to be out of there, but I lost one of the most important people in my life during my last year there and I can't help think if I had been paying better attention and not focusing on this downfall at work, that I may have noticed something and the person I lost might still be here. Even now I'm so angry I can't even mourn properly.
The resentment comes from how my old boss was incapable of showing any remorse and how he is still in the same position, other people working while he takes the credit and drinks himself and snorts himself to a place where he's "happy". I am jealous that he has something that I worked very hard on to make successful and he acts like it happened by fluke, while taking home a fair bit of money and me being left to climb the pay ladder elsewhere. I am not joking when I say if he dies I wouldn't care. He is breaking up with his partner and probably won't see his son much, but he never wanted the kid and he'll get exactly what he wants and won't feel anything about it because he is incapable of any kind of negative reflection.
This started out as a question, but quickly became a rant, so I've changed the flair.
Anyone have any advice on how I move on and LET GO??

I know they recommend 800mg of ibuprofen but I’ve heard some people say it did nothing for their pain.
I’m able to get my hands on Tramadol or Oxycodone by family members who are prescribed these. I have never tried either of these and don’t know if it’s okay to take during a MA. I’m always scared I’ll have a bad reaction to everything. Has anyone tried Tramadol or Oxycodone? Which is better for pain and are either of them worth taking for a MA?
I’m currently researching myself on google but would like advice from others as well.

I've been dealing with excruciating back pain since October. I finally got an MRI end of March, and found I have 2 bulging discs and high grade central stenosis. I had an epidural steroid injection 2 weeks ago that I swear has made the pain more consistently worse.
I've been in the ER multiple times the past week and a half crying in pain. Last time I went for relief, I had a shot of morphine, a shot of Valium, and then IV dilaudid just to bring the pain down enough for me to manage. They've prescribed a 2 day supply (6 pills) of 5mg oxycodones a couple of times leaving the ER, but those don't even seem to touch the pain anyways and then I'm right back to square 1 and having to go to the ER crying hoping for any sort of relief.
I have a consultation for surgery with an orthopedic place on the 13th.
I have been miserable for so long and truly can't handle the pain the way its been going any longer.
I have no idea how I can manage this pain without driving 30 mins screaming and crying in pain in the car to the ER every other day. I'm losing my mind and don't know what to do or how to get relief from this pain until I can finally have surgery.
Any sort of advice on how I can avoid having to make a painful trip to the ER almost every day would be greatly appreciated. I can't live in this pain any longer.

"Nyeeeh...Kaede, Kaede!" Himiko exclaimed. Kaede and Miu frantically looked up from what they were doing to see Himiko running into their room.

"Himiko! What's wrong?" Kaede asked immediately.
"Nyeh! Open your window! Hurry!" Himiko demanded. Kaede went straight to the window to open it. With an excited smile, Himiko rushed over to the window and looked out of it.
"What's...going on?" Kaede asked as Himiko darted her head around as if she were looking for something outside. Suddenly, she gasped, and lowered herself where only her eyes were peeking over the window sill.
"There he is!" she whispered. Miu joined them at the window. All three girls saw Kokichi chasing Keebo around. Kokichi was laughing mischievously while holding a horseshoe-shaped object. Keebo was screaming his head off, begging Kokichi to leave him alone. Miu and Kaede smiled at Himiko and rolled their eyes.
"What's he up to this time?" Kaede asked her. Himiko sighed dreamily.
"Ohh...he's just chasing Keebo with a magnet," she answered, laying her head on her arms.
"Why the hell is he doin' that?" Miu asked.
"Ohh...to see if Keebo has the same reaction to when you stick a magnet on a TV screen," Himiko replied, her eyes still glued to Kokichi.
"Uhh...don't you think we should stop him?!" Kaede exclaimed.
"Ohh...I would love to," Himiko sighed. "I'd do anything to talk to him. But...I'm too nervous." Kaede shook her head.
"I'll go stop him, then," she said, and dashed out of the room. Himiko kept her eyes on Kokichi. Like a predator stalking its prey, he was slowly approaching Keebo, who was backed against a tree, pleading for Kokichi to stop.
"Huh! That little dumbass actually thinks a magnet is gonna mess up Keebo?!" Miu said. "Himiko, you have a crush on a brainless, dickless asshole!"
"Nyeeeh...I'm sure he knows," Himiko sighed longingly. "He's just tormenting Keebo."
"Well...then he's just a dickless asshole, then," Miu said with a shrug. They both watched as Kaede went up to Kokichi, snatched the magnet from him, and smacked him upside his head, pointing her finger at him and scolding him. Keebo fell to his knees and folded his hands together, thanking Kaede. Kokichi merely laughed and shrugged, telling both Kaede and Keebo that the magnet wasn't going to do anything to Keebo. Kaede continued to scold him, and told him that he should stop terrorizing Keebo, anyway. Kokichi yawned from boredom and placed his hands behind his head as Kaede reprimanded him. Himiko propped her head into her hands and smiled dreamily at him.
"He doesn't care that he's in trouble," she said. "Nyeeeh...he's so cool and rebellious."
"Eh?! What, you got a thing for bad boys, or somethin,' Himiko?!" Miu asked. Himiko shook her head.
"Not bad boys...just Kokichi," she said.
"Yeah, Kokichi can't be a bad boy, anyway," Miu said. "In order to be a bad boy, you gotta have a big dick...or a dick, period!" But, Himiko wasn't listening. She kept gazing longingly at Kokichi. "Ugh...if you wanna talk to him so badly, just do it!"
"I can't!" Himiko replied, looking to Miu in horror. "You don't just talk to a boy you like! If you do, he'll find out you like him, and then he'll start ignoring you and stuff!"
"Well, you can't just sit around gawkin' at him all day!" Miu said.
"At this point, it's the only thing I can do," Himiko sighed sadly.
"Jeez, ya got no tits or balls!" Miu scoffed. "So, what, you're never gonna talk to him?! What's the point in havin' a crush on him if you're not even gonna talk to him or blow him?!"
"Just admiring him from afar is enough for me," Himiko said, though she wanted more than that. Miu rolled her eyes.
"That's pathetic!" she said. "I didn't think you were that much of a pussy!" Himiko turned to glare at her. Suddenly, Kaede came back into the room, sighing disapprovingly. In her hand was the magnet that Kokichi had been wielding at Keebo. Himiko stood up and clasped her hands together with anticipation.
"Nyeh! Kaede! W-What did he say?!" she asked. "D-Did he happen to mention me?!" Kaede raised her brow at Himiko.
"Um...nooo? Why would he mention you?" she asked. Himiko's shoulders slumped.

"Just wishful thinking," she mumbled, hanging her head. Kaede tilted her head and gave Himiko a sympathetic smile.
"Well, he didn't mention you, but I actually did see his eyes look in your guys' direction," she said. Himiko gasped.
"Y-you mean...he saw me?!" she whisper-screamed.
"Hmhmhm...it's possible," Kaede chuckled. "After he looked, I saw him smile a little."
"I bet he was gettin' a sneak peek at the twins!" Miu said. Kaede frowned in annoyance at her.
"Anyway..." she muttered, rolling her eyes. Suddenly, Kokichi waltzed right into the room with his hands behind his head. Himiko's heart stopped, and she became paralyzed with nervousness.

"Kaedeeee...you still have my magnet!" Kokichi sang with a cheeky grin. Miu shot a brief smirk at Himiko. Kaede crossed her arms at Kokichi.
"I'm not giving it back to you," she said. "I don't trust you with it."
"No faaaiiir!" Kokichi whined. "You're not my mom! That's what Kirumi's for! Hmph!"
"Well...too bad," Kaede said, placing her hand on her hip, and holding the magnet close to her chest. Kokichi turned to Himiko and gestured to her.
"I bet Himiko would back me up!" he said. "Himiko, will you please tell Kaede to give me back my magnet? Pwetty pweeaaase?" Himiko felt her brain going haywire.
"Nyeeeh...um...magnet, back Kaede his give," she stuttered. "W-Wait! I m-mean...K-Kaede, give his m-magnet back." Kaede shrugged and relinquished the magnet to Kokichi.
"Woooow! It totally worked!" Kokichi exclaimed. He reached for Himiko's hand and shook it. Fireworks were going off in Himiko's brain. "Thanks, Himiko! You truly are magical!" He turned and sauntered out of the room. Himiko slowly raised her Kokichi-infested hand up to her face, staring at it as if it were made of gold. Kaede smiled and rolled her eyes, while Miu snorted.
"Nyeeeeh...he touched my hand!!" Himiko whisper-screamed. "Did you guys see that?! He...touched...my...hand!!!" She danced in a circle, flailing her arms.
"Yes, we saw, Himiko," Kaede replied.
"By the way, Kirumi asked what you guys want for dinner," Kokichi said, suddenly reappearing in the room. Himiko stopped dancing immediately and froze in fear again. Kokichi leaned against the doorway, twirling the magnet around his finger as he gave Himiko a cheeky grin. "Nee-heehee...Himiko, were you dancing just now?"
"U-Um...yeah," Himiko replied nervously. "I-I was...showing Kaede and Miu a dance move I saw on TV."
"Oh?" Kokichi replied with what seemed like an innocent smile. "Which dance move?"
"Um...th-this one?" Himiko answered. She then began flailing her arms awkwardly and slowly twirled around. "It's called, the, um...'The Twisted Octopus.'"
"Cool," Kokichi replied as a smirk slowly grew on his face. "I'll have to look that dance move up on YouTube." Himiko's eyes widened.
"N-No!" she exclaimed, then covered her mouth. "Um, I mean...no, you wouldn't like it. I-It's not your style." Kokichi shrugged.
"Okie-dokie, then," he replied. "Sooo...what did you guys want for dinner?"
"Um...spaghetti is fine with me, I guess," Kaede answered.
"Yeeeaaah...and ya know what? Tell Kirumi to throw in some extra meatballs!" Miu added. "They remind me of the good ol' days!" Kaede groaned and rolled her eyes in exasperation. Kokichi shifted his gaze to Himiko.

"And you, Himiko?" he asked.
"Spaghetti's fine!" she squeaked.
"Nice!" Kokichi replied. "Welp, I'll go tell Kirumi, then!" He looked at each girl, making sure to look at Himiko last. Still twirling his magnet, he gave Himiko a small, flirty grin before leaving the room.
"Wow," Kaede said, giving Himiko a surprised smile. "Did you see the way he looked at you?"
"Huh? Why?! W-What about it?!" Himiko asked.
"I think he knows you like him, Himiko," Kaede said.
"Nyeh! N-No! No, he doesn't!" Himiko said. "If he did, he wouldn't be talking to me at all! He'd ignore me and think I'm weird! He wouldn't want anything to do with me at all!"
"Ooookay, whatever you say, Himiko," Kaede said. "But I think he knows."

"Especially after he gave you the eyes," Miu agreed.
"Well, I don't think he does!" Himiko insisted. "That look didn't mean anything!"
"Uuuuh-huh," Kaede and Miu replied in unison, smirking at Himiko.
"I mean, you never know, Himiko, he might like you back," Kaede said.
"Yeah, right," Himiko muttered. "He's way out of my league. He's smarter than me, and I bet he doesn't get nervous when he talks to the people he has a crush on. He's always so confident, and he's charming. I bet he can get anybody he wants." She hung her head sadly. Kaede placed a comforting hand on Himiko's shoulder.
"Well, maybe he comes off as confident and charming because you like seeing him that way, but in fact, he's probably the opposite," Kaede said. "You never know until you talk to him, Himiko." Himiko looked up at Kaede with hope.
"If I do, do you think he'd want to be my boyfriend?" she asked. Her hopeful gaze became dreamy. "And then we'll get married and live happily ever after in a mansion? And then we'll travel the world? And end up living somewhere romantic, like...like Paris, or Hawaii, or something?"

"Ha! In your dreams, half-pint!" Miu cackled. Himiko hung her head despondently. Kaede frowned at Miu and smacked her head. Then, she turned back to Himiko with an encouraging smile.
"You never know until you talk to him," she answered. "Sometimes, even though it's scary, you have to make the first move, Himiko. If you don't, you could be spending the rest of your life with regret."
"Yeah...you're right," Himiko said. Deep in her heart, Himiko knew Kaede was right. It just wasn't that easy. Himiko did want to talk to Kokichi. She wished she could talk to him forever. She just didn't know how to make that first move. Suddenly, she was struck with an idea that, oddly enough, Miu had given her. In your dreams! Miu had said.
"Um...I gotta go," Himiko mumbled. "Thanks for the advice, Kaede."
"Sure! No problem!" Kaede answered in confusion as she watched Himiko suddenly rush out of the room. As Himiko walked back to her room, her mind was racing with excitement. If she couldn't talk to Kokichi in real life, she knew another way! And she knew exactly how to do it!
Part Two
Later that night, while everyone was asleep, Himiko quietly tiptoed downstairs and headed towards the back door to Casa V3. Ever so quietly, she opened the door and closed it, pausing for a few seconds to make sure nobody heard her. Then, she tiptoed over to the gazebo and opened the entrance to her secret magic room. Once inside, she headed straight for her bookshelf containing spellbooks. She moved her hand along the spines, searching for a particular spellbook.
"Nyeh! Here it is!" she exclaimed, pulling out a spellbook entitled "Inside the Magical Mind." She opened it and skimmed the section of the book about dreams until she found what she was looking for. She came across a chapter called, "Build the Perfect Dream." Each section of the chapter listed different genres, like comedy, action-adventure, horror, etc. The one Himiko was looking for was, of course, romance. She hurried over to the romance section of the chapter. Filled with excitement, she began to read:
~ROMANCE:~

Love is in the air! But if you want it in your dreams, as well, the list below will give you the perfect opportunity to build your ideal love life! Whether you want a sugary sweet relationship with your ideal, or you want to heat it up with some hot and steamy goodness is all up to you!
Sweet love dream: Wanna have a dream where you and your ideal are in a cutesy, lovey-dovey, mushy relationship? Then, a sweet love dream is what you need!

Boil water in a small cauldron. Once water is boiled, add 1/2 cup of dream powder, a pinch of sunlight, 3/4 cup of pixie dust, 1 tsp of cinnamon, 1 tsp of sugar, and a strand of hair of the person you wish to romance, or be romanced by. Mix contents until water becomes a different color. Pour contents into a potion bottle. Add sleep powder before consuming. Drink and enjoy! Add extra sugar for an extra sweet dream!
Spicy love dream: A dream where you and your ideal are involved in a relationship with a bit of spice to it with just the right amount of steam! Look no further than the spicy love dream!
Boil water in a small cauldron. Once water is boiled, add 1/2 cup of dream powder, 3/4 cup of fire flakes, 1 tsp of pepper, 1 tsp of ground ginger, 1 tsp of cinnamon, and a strand of hair of the person you wish to romance, or be romanced by. Mix contents until water becomes a different color. Pour contents into a potion bottle. Add sleep powder before consuming. Drink and enjoy! Add extra pepper, ginger, and cinnamon for an extra spicy dream!
Hot and steamy love dream: Want a relationship dripping with lust and passion? How scandalous! But you've just got to have one, right? Then, a hot and steamy love dream is what you're looking for!
Boil water in a small cauldron. Once water is boiled, add 1/2 cup of dream powder, 2 cups of fire flakes, 2 cups of dragon fire, 1/2 cup of pepper, 1/2 cup of ginger, 3/4 cup of cinnamon, 3/4 cup of sugar, 1 vampire fang, a petal of the succubus flower, and a strand of hair of the person you wish to romance, or be romanced by. Mix contents until water becomes a different color. Pour contents into a potion bottle. Add sleep powder before consuming. Drink and enjoy!
Himiko looked in dismay as she read the directions. What filled her with dread was having to obtain a strand of hair from Kokichi. How was she going to do that? It's not like she could go up to him and ask him for a strand of his hair. She'd have to get his hair some other way. She thought to herself as she thought of his dark black-purplish hair. She smiled to herself, thinking how it curved outwards. She thought it matched his mischievous personality well. She also thought it was weird. How was he able to brush his hair for it to look like that? That's when an idea popped into her head: his brush! She had to sneak into his room to retrieve it. Without thinking anymore about it, she hurried out of her magic room and straight for the boys hallway. She took a deep breath as she stood outside of Kokichi and Gonta's room.
After mentally preparing herself, she slowly opened their door and peeked inside. Both Kokichi and Gonta were sound asleep. Himiko briefly closed her eyes in relief. She tiptoed over to Kokichi's nightstand and quietly opened the drawers, searching for his brush. Fortunately, it was in the second drawer, and she found strands of his hair sticking out from it. She plucked a few of the strands and hid them in her pocket, reminding herself to put them in a jar later. She was about to leave when she looked over to Kokichi. It was weird. He was so lively and animated all the time that it seemed strange to see him so quiet. But there he was, snoozing peacefully. Himiko thought it was actually quite adorable. She could watch him sleep forever, except...that was rather creepy. She couldn't move her feet, however. She wanted so badly to kiss him goodnight. She couldn't help herself. Blushing, she tiptoed quietly next to Kokichi's bed. He was sighing softly in his sleep. Himiko smiled sweetly at him.
"Nyeh...goodnight, Kokichi," she whispered, and leaned forward to gently kiss his forehead. She then headed towards the door. "Sweet dreams," she whispered before smiling at Kokichi and shutting the door behind her. Back inside her magic room, Himiko stored Kokichi's strands of hair in a jar while pondering what type of dream she should have.
"I'll start with the sweet love dream," she said to herself, checking her spellbook again. "I don't think I'm ready for that third one." She then got right to work on the potion. She added each ingredient after boiling water in her cauldron. As she did, steam began to emanate from the cauldron. Himiko slowly twirled her hands, lifting them up to her face as the sweet-smelling steam filled her nostrils. She then added Kokichi's strand of hair and began to stir the ingredients. After a while, the water turned a rich, vibrant purple. Himiko's face glowed from the purple water. She grinned excitedly as the water began to sparkle. She grabbed a potion bottle and poured the contents of the cauldron inside.
"Nyeh...and now for the sleep powder!" she said. She grabbed a cup and a vial of sleeping powder from her shelf. She poured the purple potion into the cup before storing the potion bottle onto her shelf. Then, she added the sleeping powder to the potion inside her cup. She drank the potion. It was sweet, and surprisingly tasted like grape soda, Kokichi's favorite. After she finished drinking the potion, Himiko hurried excitedly back to her room and snuggled underneath her blanket, falling asleep immediately.

First / Previous / Next
Fen woke up on her own, confused. Wasn't Starlight supposed to wake her up?
"Starlight?"
"Yes Fen?"
"Why didn't you wake me?"
"I tried once, but you were very asleep. I asked Northern for advice and she said to let you sleep."
That explains that. "What time is it?"
"It is 0312. Everyone else is asleep or resting in their cabins. Northern is sitting in the lounge."
Fen got out of bed. One of the annoying things about space travel is that everyone has their own time on their ships. There's no such thing as timezones after all. You could get used to the clock on one ship, and then move to another and your lunch is the middle of the night. Fen wasn't tired at all, and had plenty of time to think. She had come to a decision.
Meredith's yacht was about the same size as Fen's frigate, so there wasn't many places to get lost. She made her way to the lounge and came across Northern lounging on a couch, facing the large, wide windows. The lights were extinguished, so the brilliance of interstellar space was the only light. "Northern?"
She turned and smiled. "Hi Fen, couldn't sleep?" She gestured towards the couch. Fen joined her.
"You let me sleep though dinner, so now it's 0300 and I'm completely awake. Why are you up?"
Northern shrugged and continued to stare out the window. "Didn't feel like resting in my room, wanted to think about things." She gestured towards the window. "I always think better when I have a view like this."
Fen nodded and leaned back. The couch really was comfortable. "I know what you mean. Even though I grew up on a space station, I hardly ever saw the stars. Our district didn't have any windows, and we hardly ever made it up to the promenade." Fen's face darkened. "It wasn't for people like us."
Northern turned to look at her. "Humans?"
She shook her head. "Refugees."
"Ah." Northern turned back towards the window and they enjoyed the silence for a bit.
"Northern, I spent some time in the last day thinking. About Gord, and Meredith and all that's going on and Empire and Nanites and so on."
"And?"
Fen sighed and leaned against Northern. "I don't want anything to do with any of it."
She felt Northern shake gently. Surprised, she looked up and saw Northern smiling and try to hold in laughter.
"What?"
"It's just..." Northern took a breath, held it a second and let it out. "It's just I was thinking the exact same thing." She turned to Fen. "Look. You don't have the Nanites anymore, Gord and Meredith are deep in-" She did an impression of Gord "-'planning on defeating the Nanites' and what are we going to do?" Fen could feel her shoulder move in a shrug. "We're going to get caught up in the whole thing, and it'll probably go badly and I'd rather be elsewhere." Northern looked back at the window. "I'm not Gord. I didn't get to be the age I am by going into danger."
Fen sat up. "What about Zhe?"
"She'll do anything you ask her to. You know she has a crush on you, right?"
"Yes, I know. I've told her I'm not interested but-"
"But you can't change how she feels."
Fen nodded. "We should ask her."
Fen and Northern got up and walked down to Zhe's room. She had a small suite near engineering. Meredith had apologized for the room, but Zhe said the noise was soothing. It reminded her of home. Fen knocked gently on the door. "Zhe?"
"Come in" The little speaker by the door crackled to life. Fen touched the door and it slid open. Zhe was sitting up in bed, her fur matted from sleep. "What is it? Is something wrong?"
Fen shook her head. "Northern and I want to leave. We don't want to be a part of this anymore. Do you want to come with us?"
Zhe practically jumped out of bed. "Yes! Oh Ancestors, yes!" She started throwing clothes into her bag.
Northern looked at Fen, and raised an eyebrow. Fen turned to Zhe. "You agreed to that awfully easily."
"I don't like Meredith's friends, honor guard, whatever. They... rub my fur the wrong way." Her ears twitched, laughing at her own joke. "They're too used to just ordering people around, especially people like me." She stopped and looked up at Northern, her ears pointed. "You saw it, didn't you?"
"I did, yes." Northern had noticed that Meredith's honor guard tended to order Zhe around like she was some of the help. It wasn't blatant, and it wasn't degrading, but there was an air of othering they did. Northern was not surprised.
Fen was. "What were they doing?"
Zhe resumed packing. "The usual stuff. Micro-aggressions, asking if they can pet me, complimenting my Colonic, that kind of thing. They weren't deliberately being anti-K'laxi, but when you spend time in human space, you see it."
It was all the same stuff Fen was used to on the Gren station. "I'm sorry Zhe."
Her tail flicked and she waved off Fen as she finished packing. "It happens." She stood and shouldered her bag. "Shall we?"
Northern had already grabbed her wheeled cases, and other than the clothes she was wearing, Fen didn't have anything. She was dragged to Starlight by Meredith and Gord and all of her stuff was back on the Frigate.
"I never asked, but where are we?" Fen said as they walked towards the airlock. "Are we still at Picaresque?"
"Yup! Frigate is still parked where you left it. We're in a parking orbit just outside."
Fen stopped. "So, how are we going to leave?"
"It's almost as if you don't think I have a plan for everything Fen, I'm almost hurt!" Northern's eyes flashed blue for a split second, and there was a muffled thump. "Our ride's here."
There was a minute of airlock cycling, and the doors opened to a shuttle. It was small, ancient, smelled of cooked food and too many people, and had a very... handmade appearance. It almost looked like...
"Is this an old escape pod?" Zhe bounded in and sat in the nearest seat."
"Good eye Zhe! Yes, Picaresque had a supply of escape pods and turned them into shuttles you can hail. They'll take you around the system for a reasonable fee."
Northern entered the pod and Fen handed her the cases. As she stepped in, she turned and saw Gord leaning against the hall.
"Headed out?"
Fen crossed her arms. "I don't want to be a part of any of this." She gestured out towards the yacht. "Any of that." Northern and Zhe leaned forward from their seats and came into view behind Fen. "None of us do."
Gord shugged. "That's all right, I won't stop you. I won't even wake the others. He hefted himself off the hall and walked towards them. "Just... be careful Fen. You have a habit of attracting trouble. It might be a product of your genetic makeup." His smile was gentle, sad. "You do look like her. She was a little older than you when I met Melody. I hear her in your voice too. Your accent is different; she grew up on Meíhuà, but you sound like her when you are emphatic."
"I am not her."
"I never said you were, Fen. All you share with the first Empress is genes. You had a different life, different upbringing. I think she would have liked you. Just remember: She always thought she was doing the right thing."
Fen sat in her seat and pulled the safety bar down. "I'll keep that in mind."
"Do, please." Gord slapped the close button on the airlock and it slid shut.
The ride over to Picaresque was uneventful. As soon as they entered the docking hall, the pod lowered to the deck and they were let out next to a row of identical pods, waiting for customers.
The docking hall was huge, airy, and hot. Since it opened up to space as ships came and went, not much effort was placed on HVAC for the space. The ships could control their own temperature, and the workers wore space suits. Fen, Northern and Zhe trotted across the deck as they made their way down to the frigate, parked where they left it. Fen grasped the forward landing leg and it recognized her palm. The lower door quietly sliding open.
"Didn't we have a crew?" Fen walked around the empty frigate looking for people. They had hired a few K'laxi to help out with operations while they did a few jobs, and it's not like they spent a lot of time trying to get to know them, but Fen paid on time and paid well. She snorted as she rounded a corner and found the kitchenette spotless with a note.
"Got a better offer with a K'laxi crew. Good luck!" with three signatures. Fen crumpled the paper. "Ancestors. What the hell? We were gone what, a day and a half? They couldn't hang around?"
"Guess not." Northern sighed and slouched. "I'll be the ship again."
"Wait. Are there any AIs on Picaresque? Do you think we could hire anyone to be the ship? I know you hate it, I don't want to have you do anything you don't want. It's not like we're short on money."
"Hmm." Northern straightened up. "You know, probably. Let's head to the promenade and see what we can learn."
Zhe dropped her bag in front of her door. "The promenade? I thought we're too close to Imperial space for AIs to be out and about."
Northern turned back around and headed down the ramp to the station. "No, the promenade is where we can enter the Basement."