By popular demand, I guess...
I was kinda just being a smart-ass, but some of you wanted more so here it is: epilogues for every NPC as if they didn't continue to travel with Gorion's Ward and instead just decided to live their own life. Obviously, there are some implied alignment changes here.
This turned out to be longer than I expected and I kinda just threw it all together while I was working. Please excuse any typos or sloppy writing.
I want to apologize for one thing, though. Viconia's epilogue really only works if GW is a male, so I had to make that assumption for the sake of her story. If it matters any, I easily play just as many female GWs as I do male GWs. In fact, I probably play more female GWs because I don't care for the romances, frequently play the canon party, and want to nip the lame Jah romance in the bud.
But, to have them all in one place, I included my original smart-ass epilogues with the additional ones I created. Now, every character from BG1 and BG2 has an epilogue. I don't have the EE characters, though, because I play the original games and don't really know them.
So, just for funsies, which one is your favorite and why?
"Anomen continued to wait at the Copper Coronet for a party of adventurers willing to travel with him. Maybe it was the grating sound of his voice, or perhaps the way he leered at women, but he continued to remain alone. Eventually, he needed to find work to make ends meet. With Gorion's Ward having disbanded the slave traders and pit fights, Hendak had to find a new form of entertainment for the patrons. As such, he invented an all male review ladies night, and Anomen found work as a 'dancer'. He left the Most Noble Order of the Radiant Heart to join the less noble order of the pole. He also renounced his faith to Helm and instead allied himself with Waukeen because if you wanna see some groin, you gotta have some coin."
"Despite Gorion's Ward clearing the trolls from her keep, Nalia was not able to reclaim her lands and instead lost her estate to Lord Roenall. The lord offered to let her retain residence in her family's ancestral home, but only in exchange for her hand in marriage. Nalia found the proposition to be repugnant. Instead, she salvaged whatever wealth she could from her family's keep and moved to Athkatla to start a new life. She no longer helped the less fortunate, as she was now among their numbers and had her own problems. Nalia's lack of any practical skills combined with her sense of entitlement sent her into a life of failure followed by drinking and debauchery. She now spends more time back at the Copper Coronet than anywhere else. It is hard to say where she squanders her wealth more, the alcohol, or on the dancers during Ladies Night."
"After the incident with the Planar Sphere, Valygar was finally free of his past, could retire to his cabin, and pursue his true passion: writing. Ironically, the only inspiration he found ended up stemming from his family's checkered past. Valygar's only works that even had middling success were 'Tuesdays with Lavok' and 'Dude, Where's My Planar Sphere', with the latter being made into a production at the Five Flagoons Theater."
"Haer'Dalis continued to work as a performer at the Five Flagoons Theater. Unfortunately, it struggled due to poor management. It might have turned out better if an outside agent with fresh ideas had stepped in, but Gorion's Ward had better things to do than be a bard. While the work was generally steady, the returns were not great and the material was a little low-brow for Haer'Dalis' liking. The tiefling realized he reached rock bottom when he was cast as the lead in a play about a buffoon who apparently lost a plane-shifting apparatus the size of a small castle and had to find it before his parents returned from Neverwinter. After the opening night, he took his own life in his dressing room. His body was found the next morning with a note saying, 'Art is dead and I am art, so I shall join art in death.' Biff the Understudy stepped in for Haer'Dalis despite never having an opportunity to read the script. Nevertheless, the production was a resounding success and launched Biff's career to new heights."
“A heartbroken Garrick found work as a character actor at the Five Flagoons Theater, but eventually gained more success as a writer and director. He found it to be a mostly agreeable situation, aside from a tiefling primadonna who would constantly belittle his work and call it ”trite" and “drivel”. Fortunately, that situation worked itself out in time and Garrick found Biff to be much easier to direct. With the tiefling gone, his ideas had room to grow. He invented a new kind of love story, one where the protagonist doesn't always get the girl at the end but the journey to that ending would be quite amusing. He labeled this genre “the Comedy of Romance” and the works were mostly based on his own life. His plays were quite popular among the commoners, with his top selling shows being 'Sleepless in Saradush', 'Silverymoon Linings Playbook', and 'Crazy Rich Aasimars'. He eventually fully transitioned off the stage into the director's chair. By the peak of his fame, he was married to none other than Queen Ellesime."
“Aerie continued to work at the circus and WOULD NOT SHUT UP ABOUT HER DAMN WINGS. Even Quayle eventually grew sick of hearing about it. This put strain on their relationship. Things took a turn for the better when Ribald Barterman acquired a new curiosity for his shop. It was a magical ring which he sold to Quayle at a reduced rate out of sympathy. This ”treasure" was actually a cursed Ring of Deafness, which Quayle found to be anything but a curse and wore it for the rest of his days."
“Xzar and Montaron were both slain at the hands of the Athkatla Harpers, but this is actually where their story begins. Xzar, as he had done so many times before, had a backup plan of an arcane nature should death befall either he or the halfling. Their mortal essences were pulled to a pocket plane he created. There they could be channeled into restored bodies cloned at his estate. With this particular round of ritual, Xzar had incidentally made a slight error in the incantation and the two found themselves in a time suspended state in Xzar's pocket plane. It was only five minutes for the rest of the world, but it was fifty years for them. This turned out to be a pivot point in their relationship. Having only each other's company in this shadowy void, they were finally able to work out their feelings for each other. When they had returned to the prime material plane, they discovered their mutual animosity was replaced with love. Rather than pick up their life where they left off with the Zhentarim, they decided to pack it all in, moved to Bryn Shander, and start a bed and breakfast. Montaron rediscovered his halfling roots and love for the culinary arts while Xzar would perform seances to connect guests with their late loved ones. Scones and Bones became an overnight success and was consistently listed as a “must see” in Volo's travel guides. In their golden years, the couple co-wrote a memoir of their journey, ‘Brokeback Montaron’, which is sold in bookstores everywhere."
“After briefly crossing paths with Gorion's Ward, Mazzy Fentan continued her crusade as a de facto halfling paladin. She eventually found herself petitioning for membership at the Most Noble Order of the Radiant Heart in Athkatla after she had singlehandedly saved a village from an ancient dracolich. Despite the extent of her virtue and accomplishment, her petition was denied on the basis that halflings could not possibly be real paladins. This inspired her next crusade, one to break down vocational barriers for all demihuman races. Why couldn't halflings be paladins or dwarves be wizards? And why did gnomes always have to be illusionists? It simply made no goddamn sense. She began to get traction with her quest when she attended lectures by the wizards of the (sword) coast in Candlekeep. With their help, she ushered Faerun into a new edition era where there would be no vocational barriers for adventurers based on their race. Soon, the world began to see roguish halflings that also venerated Helm, while tending to the wilds as a druid. Half-orc bards also studied as wizards while manifesting natural arcane abilities as sorcerers. Tiefling paladins took their crusades to the wilderness and served as rangers, while sidelining as clergy to Mystra. The world was now a liberated place, free to not make any goddamn sense in a myriad of new ways. At one point, Lady Mazzy Fentan of Trademeet (now formally a paladin) crossed paths with a dwarven shadowdancebard and in that moment she regretted everything. Seriously, just take a moment and picture that. It would look fucking ridiculous.”
“Yeslick's clanhome was flooded once again. Despondent and without options, he took work at a smithy in Baldur's Gate but never stopped dreaming of finding both a clan and a home. He found a way to bring this dream to life after a courageous halfling paladin broke down the barriers for, among other things, dwarves to be wizards. Yeslick had an idea. He studied magic diligently until he was able to cast two spells of great importance: Water Breathing and Permanence. He then searched the lands for other clanless dwarves who would be willing to try something new. With the new clan he formed, Yeslick permanently gave all his fellow clansman the ability to breath underwater. They then moved into the flooded Cloakwood Mines and built the first underwater dwarven stronghold. Using his arcane powers, Yeslick also developed the ability to speak with the marine life that shared this stronghold. And, with that, the clan Aquadwarf was born. At one point, Valygar visited and wrote a play based on Yeslick's story. However, he couldn't even get it to stage at the Five Flagoons Theater. The illustrious director Garrick was quoted as saying, “A hero that can breath underwater and talk to fish? Nobody would go for that!"
“Keldorn finally retired from the Most Noble Order of the Radiant Heart and looked forward to a much simpler life. He rekindled his marriage with Lady Maria and life seemed to improve. It was rather early on when the couple discovered that Maria had become pregnant again. It was also not long after that when Peony, the housekeeper, also became pregnant. Maria started to ask Keldorn about this, but Keldorn started to get defensive and asked, ”Hey, who's the Inquisitor here?" Then Keldorn started to do the math with her to track the conception of Maria's pregnancy. She certainly did not want him to get to the end of that equation, so she quickly changed the subject. She suggested getting a new maid, but Keldorn chastised her for abandoning someone in their time of need who had been like family for years. He forbade Peony's departure claiming that his god, Torm, would not stand for it. Maria then made a passive aggressive comment about Torm being the god of loyalty, but she was mostly just muttering under her breath to get the last word in. Eventually, both children were born and had probably the most awkward upbringing of anyone in Faerun."
“After Gorion's Ward helped Coran take down a wyvern, the rogue brought the beast's head back to the mayor of Beregost for the reward and accolades. He thought this put him in a position to be a hero of great renown and perhaps, just maybe, people would stop mocking him for his flashy attire and completely superfluous eye mask. They didn't. He only gained acceptance when he crossed paths with a ranger who seemed indifferent towards Coran's keen fashion sense. Coran traveled the Sword Coast with his ranger sidekick, righting the wrongs against the ‘little guy’ and taking the law into their own hands when needed. This partnership dissolved when he discovered that the ranger thought Coran was the sidekick. As if! Coran tried to correct the ranger, whose argument was, 'Really, man, if that outfit doesn't scream sidekick then I'm Elminster's twin brother.' The ranger was not related to Elminster and shared no resemblance.
“Kivan never was able to get his revenge on Tazok. Unbeknownst to him, that honor was taken by Gorion's Ward. His thirst for vengeance continued to eat away at him until he found himself in a bat infested cave in the wilderness. It was then he snapped. He turned the cave into his secret hideaway, put together a disguise and started wandering the sword coast looking for evil-doers to punish. He would leave his calling card wherever he saved the day, a token of a bat with longer ears like an elf. And bats already had rather long ears so these bat ears were almost comically obtrusive. Nevertheless, his deeds were generally appreciated and the people stared calling him Bat-elf. For a short spell, another elf tagged along with him and tried to help, but he was so flamboyantly dressed that one could pick his sidekick out of the shadows blindfolded. Kivan eventually had to send him on his way. Unfortunately, his vigilante crusade abruptly ended after receiving a cease and decist order from DC Comics. Kivan could fight both monster and marauder all day, but his 14 Constitution wouldn't hold up against a lawsuit for trademark infringement.”
“Skie was deeply affected by both the death of her brother and the assassination of her father. And yes, her father was actually murdered and didn't lol-jk back to life in some crappy DLC. In any event, through these traumas, she came to realize the puerility of what she thought was her brilliant criminal masterminding. Instead, she decided to settle down and live a more responsible life as an upstanding citizen of Baldur's Gate. She took the reins of her father's estate after his death and rose to prominence as one of the Grand Dukes of the city. She maintained her relationship with Eldoth for quite some time, inexplicably, as he refused to get a job because he didn't want to take attention from his band which he swore was going to make it. However, the bard spent most of the day either lounging at Skie’s estate or gambling away his allowance with games of three-dragon-ante at the Helm and Cloak. Eventually, inspired by the book “Men Are From Menzoberranzan, Women Are From Immilmar," she decided to call it quits with Eldoth and sent him packing. Shortly thereafter, she met a man who was nothing like Eldoth and they settled down together to start a family."
“Eldoth's dreams of being a world-famous musician fronting the greatest band in Faerun never reached fruition. This was partly because he didn't actually have a band and partly because he didn't have the talent to write music. Instead, he just had a lute he purchased at Lucky Aello's Discount Store that only had one A-string and was missing the E-string. Also, Eldoth could only play power chords and he couldn't really sing and play at the same time. Most of the time he would just strum a chord or two and then talk about what the song would do next, often describing a solo and half playing it on an ”air lute" (while he was still holding an actual lute, mind you) to give people the idea as to how the song would sound when it was finally written. Yeah, he was one of those guys. After Skie kicked him to the curb, he bounced between various barmaids who clearly had low self-esteem, but not low enough to keep him around for long. Eventually, he got one of them pregnant and was forced into a shotgun wedding by the barmaid's father. He now works in the kitchen at the same inn as his barmaid wife. She helps the customers up front and he cooks eggs in the back. Eldoth continues to tell himself that this experience will just provide inspiration for his music and that someday he was going to get the band back together."
“After being rescued by Gorion's Ward, Xan made his way to Baldur's Gate to regroup. He spent an inordinate amount of time beating himself up over his failures and trying to muster the gumption to continue his quest to unravel the political turmoil of the region. However, it took him months to get to this point, and by that time, Gorion's Ward already sorted out the problems in the region. Discovering this, he deemed himself a failure yet again and sunk into a deeper depression. He pulled himself out of it when he met a woman who lost most of her family to violent deaths during the iron crisis, yet she still kept herself together and became a local success in a few short years. Xan immediately fell in love with the recently single Skie Silvershield and began to court her. They eventually married and started a family. At Xan's insistence, and inspired by his wife's name, their two daughters were named Sunshine and Rainbow. Xan was a staunch supporter of his wife's career and stayed home to raise the kids. When they were older and needed less attending, he followed a new dream and became a motivational speaker.”
“Korgan had his revenge against his backstabbing crew and employer, but he felt...empty. It was done, but he felt no satisfaction. Disgruntled and disappointed, he decided to lose himself in his cups at the Copper Coronet. Even this did nothing to alleviate his malaise. One night, having passed out drunk in a peasant room at the Copper Coronet, he dreamt of that final fight but something was different. In the background of the battle, there was a glow coming from the door of a shack and he heard the whispering of a language that sounded like it was from Kara-Tur. When he woke the next morning, Korgan returned to the rooftop and found the shack from his dream. He knocked and was greeted by a priest of Illmater. Korgan told the priest of his dream and he was led into the backroom where he found a man from Kara-Tur infirm and huddled over a cup of tea. The priest explained that he had just reincarnated this man of the faith using a heart delivered by a passing adventurer. Korgan took this as a sign, converted to the faith, and the two paired up to help those in suffering as a result of the schemes of others. The tales of Korgan and Yoshimo were not only told in many of a tavern by the bards, but also collected in graphic serials that were popular among the children of Athkatla.”
“Ajantis' death sent him into an afterlife at Everwatch, the realm of Helm. For his honor and diligence, the devout knight was granted an audience with his patron. Ajantis then told Helm what utter bullshit the god was. I mean, c'mon, he's the god of protection, the Vigilant One, and he couldn't protect a group of knights from a dragon's cheap illusion spell that a mage even tried to dispel with True Sight? It was like Helm wasn't even trying. Helm was stunned by the confrontation but also had no valid defense. Ajantis called Helm to a trial that was mediated by Tyr. After careful deliberation, Tyr determined that Helm was sleeping on the job and the judgment was to demote him to a lesser deity. Now, Helm was the patron of guards, but not actual guards that ever see action, just the ceremonial ones whose weapons and armor are super shiny and probably not even real. Ajantis was then granted Helm's old portfolio and became a god that truly protected his followers.”
“Viconia left Athkatla's government district perplexed. She was rescued from burning at the stake by Gorion's Ward and then immediately dismissed. She found this to be unusual behavior for a male. She was accustomed to men either trying to bed her or kill her, but this casual indifference was completely new. Viconia came to be obsessed with Gorion's Ward from a distance. She spiraled into a fantasy where the two of them had a future together. It was pretty bad. There were some extremely embarrassing vision boards involved and that wasn't even the worst of it. When her mania reached critical mass, her obsession actually collapsed and she had an epiphany. She came to realize that she did not need this man, or any for that matter. She started on a journey of self discovery and took a moral inventory of her past relationships. She wrote about it in the book, “Men Are From Menzoberranzan, Women Are From Immilmar”. She then used the revenue from the book sales to open Athkatla's first feminist bookstore. In Her Words became a mecca for women, particularly those who felt trapped in bad relationships. The community that emerged here created the group, Friends of Galia, which strove to free women from abusive relationships. Eventually, the bookstore expanded to include an apartment block above that became a shelter for such women. Occasionally, the partners of these victims would come around to In Her Words in an attempt to drag their partners back home. You can probably guess how a confrontation between a drunken 0-level commoner and a Drow priestess of Shar ends."
“Faldorn was defeated by Jaheira in Trademeet and lost her title of Arch-Druid. In truth, she was relieved to be relieved of the position. Years of pushing forward the Shadow Druid agenda led Faldorn to realize that she had lost touch with the real Faldorn along the way. After some soul-searching, she reinvented herself as a lifestyle guru and developed an entire line of organic health and beauty products under the name, She-Wolf. Both her products and seminars were all the rage in Athkatla, specifically among noblewomen who clearly had too much free time. Faldorn eventually gave up her residence in natural environs for a lavish estate in Athkatla's government district. Her following soon pressured her to petition to join the Council of Six after the fall of the Cowled Wizards left the position open (aside from a short-term replacement). Her petition was a success and she soon found herself on the Council of Six. Under her leadership, she created created the FDAA, the Food and Drink Association of Athkatla. Now, instead of draconian rules governing magic in the city, equally restrictive rules and standards were applied to the food and drink that the people consumed.”
“Barely surviving being gravely wounded by Irenicus, Tiax left Spellhold for Athkatla where he intended to do what he did best: rule. Learning from his past campaign mistakes in Baldur's Gate, he changed his slogan from ”Tiax Rules!" to “Make Athkatla Great Again”. Of course, what he thought would make Athkatla great was putting himself in charge as a despotic leader. But, he toned down that aspect of his platform and instead focused on the history of scheming and backroom dealing of the Cowled Wizards (as if he was any less evil or scheming) and promised the people he would be different than all the other corrupt politicians. Miraculously, despite his obviously apparent character flaws, he succeeded in replacing the Cowled Wizards' representative on the Council of Six. He decided to take their stance on restrictive magic to the next level and banned magic entirely. Since he didn't study the arcane himself, it was no skin of his nose. This move undermined his support base leaving him with only the most backwards and ignorant followers. He was ultimately removed from his position when he insisted the city build a wall around the planar sphere and was expecting that the city's wizards would be the ones to pay for it. After his removal, his few remaining extreme supporters organized an invasion of the main government building under the guise of freedom of assembly. All nine of these “rebels” were rounded up, tried, and sent to prison. Tiax was convicted of treason and reincarnated in Spellhold, which was now just a common prison. After his eventual release, he was prohibited from seeking any position of power in Amn."
"Edwin Odesseiron continued to lay low with the Shadow Thieves for a while. The Cowled Wizards suffered a crippling blow as a side effect of the conflict between Gorion's Ward and Irenicus. Edwin decided to step in and finish the job. His thought was that he could wipe out the Cowled Wizard remnants and then take credit for their defeat, thereby gaining him more clout among the Red Wizards of Thay. After many conspicuous mage battles in the streets of Athkatla, he succeeded. However, the people who noticed his efforts the most were actually the people of Athkatla. They were tired of living under the Cowled Wizards' iron fist and Edwin was lauded as a liberator and hero. He even had a statue in his image raised in Waukeen's Promenade. Edwin was initially nonplussed over people finally giving him the credit he always felt he so rightfully deserved. But, he quickly came to accept their praise and bought in to being a champion for the people. Edwin continued his agenda of liberation when a clearly insane gnome who found his way on the Council of Six tried to ban magic entirely in the city. Edwin and his followers were primarily responsible for having the madman removed from his seat.
“Shar-Teel, Safana, Branwen, and Alora all happened to cross paths with each other at Elfsong one evening. Shar-Teel was looking to fight a man, Safana was looking to shag a man, Branwen was recently petrified by a man, and Alora was just excited to be somewhere new. The four got to talking with each other and, despite having wildly different personalities, seemed to hit it off. Shar-Teel was sarcastic and aggressive, Safana was self-absorbed and man-hungry, Alora was kind and sweet, and Branwen was the matriarch of the group. You wouldn't think this lot would get along, but they actually did, and their differences merely become the fuel for innocuous hi-jinks week after week.”
"With Gorion's Ward's help, Cernd was able to rescue his child that he then abandoned again at the druid grove near Trademeet. He promised that he would return to raise the child, he just needed to run to the general shop in Trademeet for some pipeweed. He never returned, but that was pretty obvious since he didn’t even smoke. Cernd continued to wander Faerun. It came to light in Cormyr that Cernd had actually married, and had children, with numerous women in Cormyr, Amn, the Sword Coast, Tethyr, Calimshan, Turmish, Halruaa, Icewind Dale, Chondath, Sembia, Impiltur, the Silver Marches, and even the Troll Hills (don't ask). Furthermore, it was discovered that Cernd was not actually a druid, just a werewolf that had a Ring of Goodberries. The druid con was so that he could have a reason to abandon his wives and children and move on to a new situation. You would be surprised at how many women could fall for a guy that can conjure an impromptu picnic in the park. Unfortunately for Cernd, Cormyr was not the kind of place to run afoul of the legal system. For the crime of bigamy, he was sentenced to life in prison. He never set foot near a druid grove again, but he was allowed to participate in a work-release program tending to the gardens of nobles.
“Kagain returned to his shop and grew even more bitter, but not over what the death of Entar Silvershield's son had done to his reputation and business. Instead, he resented that even the Enhanced Edition of the game didn't give him a remotely decent companion quest. By Moradin's hammer, Cernd even had a pretty involved companion quest and the story there both starts and ends with a deadbeat dad! Also, Kagain can regenerate! Korgan can't even do that. And another thing! He was sick of people confusing the two of them as if all dwarves look alike or something. Ok, granted, they're both old dwarves with greying beards, but Korgan's beard is tied while Kagain's beard is brushed out. Of course, none of this made sense to anyone, even to Kagain who never actually crossed paths with Cernd or Korgan. However, the dwarf had nothing to do with his time except stand in his shop, isolated and alone, until he was done in by insanity and plantar fasciitis.”
“The death of Khalid shook Jaheira to the core. She convinced herself that she could never love again, certainly not so soon after his death nor with anyone that would be a child in her eyes. That would be absurd and rather tacky. After her escape from Irenicus' prison and deposing Faldorn from the druid grove, she took over as Arch-Druid. Being a Harper just wouldn't be the same without Khalid. However, the grove would allow her to explore a new, but comfortingly familiar, phase of life. She had barely been installed as the Arch-Druid when Cernd dropped off his child and disappeared again. He did not even stay long enough to tell Jaheira the child's name. Knowing he would likely not return, she named the child Khalid after her lost love. Realizing there were other children our there without families to care for them, Jahaeira would send her subordinates to wander nearby lands and bring them to the grove for a better life. Perhaps not surprisingly, many of these children happened to be Cernd's. She eventually renamed the grove to Kinder Garden in honor of the grove's new purpose of giving these children a kinder upbringing. Jaheira's headstrong personality served her well with these lost children, who all loved her as they would any mother. The Kinder Garden became the most thriving druid grove in all of Faerun. Jaheira eventually died in 1547 DR, with hundreds of children haven been rescued in her lifetime, and a memorial was erected in her honor at the grove. The inscription read, 'Nature's Servant Awaits.'"
“After being freed from Irenicus' dungeon, Minsc put his boots on the ground at the Copper Coronet. Being the simple man that he was, he found himself unwittingly recruited into fighting in the gladiator pits (before Gorion's Ward was able to free the slaves). Yet again, Minsc took a blow to the head. But this time, its effects were something completely new. No longer was he the slow-witted evil-slaying ranger, armed to the teeth and packing a hamster. Instead, his intelligence and wisdom started to blossom and he explored, through dissertation, the impact of modern civilization on the overall ecosystem of Faerun. Indeed, before Minsc started his work, the people of Faerun didn't even have the concept of an ”ecosystem". He left Athkatla to pursue a residency at Jaheira's grove where he could study and work in peace. He published works like, “The Intersection of Geopolitics and Biodiversity: Living More but Dying Sooner”, “The Essential Symbiosis Between the Savage and Civilization”, and “Moral Urbanization: Seeking a More Comprehensive Prosperity”. Minsc continued his studies and writing and ultimately produced enough groundbreaking works to have his own annex in Candlekeep. It was shortly after the dedication of this annex that Minsc disappeared from Faerun, never to be seen again."
“Jan Jansen's fate was the most impressive of all as his endeavors shaped the very fabric of Faerun for centuries to come. His story truly serves as a moral lesson for everyone and we should heed its virtue quite seriously. Helping Lissa and Jaella planted a seed of regret in Lissa with regards to her marriage to Vaelag. Speaking of seeds, this reminds Jan of a time when he was helping his Uncle Scratchy with his turnip farm. However, Uncle Scratchy was hoodwinked and the seeds he received were actually purple carrot seeds. You can imagine Uncle Scratchy's surprise when they sprouted and he suddenly had a field of purple carrots. Well, as you probably know, you can't make turnip stew, or turnip casserole, or turnip pie with purple carrots. But it just so happened there was a mage tower nearby and the resident mage needed a vast number of carrots. Apparently, her plan was to animate them as a kind of vegetable army to combat a myconid infestation in cave system rather close to her tower. Of course, animated carrots are quite self-assured and were immune to myconoid's confusion spores. Anyway, Jan had a once-removed cousin, Bobil, that was lost in those caves when he was a young gnome. He had wandered so deep that he found himself in the den of a solitary xvart who was obsessed with a magic ring. Bobil happened to purloin that ring but it turned out to not be magic at all. However, it was still worth enough for Bobil to buy himself a nice cottage in Trademeet. He then started his own turnip farm and had better luck than Uncle Scratchy. Wait, what were we talking about, again?”
“Boo continued his mission to study the sentient life forms of Faerun and determine their potential impact on the metaverse. He preferred the continued company of Minsc due to the ranger's kindness and protectiveness. Boo found this to be quite valuable in his current miniaturized state. Even after Minsc's accident, where his intellect began to expand, Minsc never lost his good heart and inherent kindness and the two remained the best of friends. It was a number of years later that the term of Boo's mission was complete. A team of his fellow people arrived on a spelljammer to collect the giant miniaturized space hamster. Minsc (and Boo) were on a retreat in a remote part of the Neverwinter Wood when a vessel shaped like a giant acorn landed in a nearby clearing. A number of human-sized anthropomorphic hamster-like beings, who called themselves the Ysoki, emerged and met with Boo. One had a strange crystalline device which it used to restore Boo to his proper size. Minsc naturally remained composed while all this was happening. He and Boo talked often and he knew this day would be coming. Boo returned to the spelljammer with his brethren to debrief on the mission. The Ysoki wanted to bring a sample back to their homeworld for further learning and study. Boo offered Minsc for the task, as the exemplar human would fit in nicely with the Ysoki's advanced culture and society. Everyone was in agreement and made the offer to the ranger. Minsc felt like he had made every contribution he could to the people of Faerun, so he accepted and boarded the ship. Boo, excited to finally be on a spelljammer again, took the helm and plotted a course for his homeworld. At his side sat his friend and faithful companion, Minsc.”

Hello,
I am 23 years old and have recently applied for the ARMY.
Unfortunately my application was rejected for two reasons. Those reasons being, "Two or more episodes of depression between 2018 - 2024" and "Two noted episodes of anxiety in 2018 - 2022".
Now I've read the JSP and seen that what they are quoting is true, however I no longer suffer from depression and never really did to begin with. Those episodes of depression and anxiety occurred at similar times because my uncle died and as it was my first ever bout with loss, i fell into depression, then after a couple of years, my other uncle (more like a father) died also.
Now I've already sent an email to my current doctor and asked for help in re-evaluating my mental health and to see if a doctors letter and/or a psychiatric evaluation would help my case. I am not the sad teenager i once was, and i am definitely much more confident, stable and tougher that i was then. I'm not saying this to toot my own horn but to show I am not the immature person i once was.
My question is, what would help my case, and what could i do prove my mental stability.
Thanks in advance.

I think my mom might have schizophrenia So, I’ve realized I have delusions and I’m not really sure how to explain it. I definitely don’t see it in the moment but looking back months or years later I’ll say, “Damn. That was some nonsense.” I remember how I was completely convinced that what I was obsessed with was real beyond a doubt, and how it wasn’t just a belief but like the most important thing to me. I’d get so obsessed it would take over everything in my life.
This happens a lot too, but I’ll think or know I did something, only to check why someone hasn’t responded and see I never sent the message. Even if I remember doing it, there’s evidence that I didn’t. I was diagnosed with DID, OCD, CPTSD, and depression. I’m starting to think DID and depression might not be true. I only have bouts of real depression every so often now, and it’s almost always for a pretty solid reason, like when my brother died or when I broke up with the love of my life. But when it happens I’ll just go numb and stop functioning.
I’ve also had what someone described to me as “word salad,” where what I said or typed out was nonsense. When I looked back at the message I sent, I couldn’t figure out what I’d been trying to say, either. And for did, sometimes I don’t switch for a long time and then I almost forget I have did. But then I think, no. My alters definitely exist as souls living in my body. That’s real. But then someone said it sounds more like delusion than actual DID.
But onto my mother. She’s always been very religious but over the years has become scary religious. Like, “I’m sinless because I have no belly button,” “I can hear God’s voice, he gave me a spiritual gift,” “I can speak in tongues,” and the classic her saying she saw visions of angels. She also became badly addicted to prescription pain killers and started hallucinating. There was an incident in a restaurant a few years ago where she thought a bug was in her food and she “stabbed it” with her fork.
Then she lifted the fork and waved it around and yelled for the waiter in anger. It was pretty awful, she made a huge scene and couldn’t be calmed down. Another time she hallucinated worms crawling all over her floor and made me “clean them up.” Then she yelled at me for kneeling bc the worms would burrow into my knees. She thought she had parasites in her brain too. Sometimes she’s convinced that I did something bad, or meant something that I didn’t, like she sees interactions that aren’t there or interprets words/actions as attacks. She can’t be convinced she’s wrong, ever. Even with clear evidence.
So, all of that to say, I asked on my dad’s side of the family and apparently they have a lot of serious mental illness on that side too. And what I’m worried about is that I might be in the beginning stages of schizophrenia. I’ve hallucinated before, a few different times. I experienced severe child abuse for a good portion of my childhood, I had a psychotic episode after a Frankenstein of a psychiatrist put me on 6 different psych meds, I had childhood epilepsy, and I know I’ve had delusions. My current therapist is great, but she’s more of a spiritual/natural remedy type person. When I told her about the hallucinations or when we switch the body/dissociate, she almost always tells me it’s from lack of sleep.
TL;DR: My mom shows signs of schizophrenia and I worry I might be at the beginning stages. I think DID was a misdiagnosis and maybe my ‘alters,’ as real as switching and they feel, might be delusions. Their voices might be hallucinations. I’m not sure. I just want to talk about it, really. I’m very isolated. My mom thinks I’m bad and that I deserved getting beaten but I didn’t do anything bad this time and I was legally protesting, they enjoyed hurting us and I can’t talk to anyone about it bc my mom thinks I was bad and deserved it but I’m not bad and I didn’t do anything bad this time to deserve the beating, I feel like I’m screaming at a wall. Maybe I’m just having delusions again, she said the guy didn’t try to attack us but I keep rewatching the video to confirm it’s real and it is, he did try to kill us but she says we’re lying and deserved getting beaten. It wasn’t that bad but it scared me, I wasn’t beat up that bad I just got my eye injured so it could’ve been worsd but I have no one and my mom hates me, I don’t know how to convince her I wasn’t bad this time bc I showed her all the evidence but she still thinks I deserved it. My professors said they agree with me and said it’s not okay that I’m still injured and that I didn’t deserve it but I feel torn, what if I was hallucinating and didn’t actually experience what I thought I did and I actually did deserve getting beaten by police and then attacked by that guy who tried to kill us?

I think my mom might have schizophrenia So, I’ve realized I have delusions and I’m not really sure how to explain it. I definitely don’t see it in the moment but looking back months or years later I’ll say, “Damn. That was some nonsense.” I remember how I was completely convinced that what I was obsessed with was real beyond a doubt, and how it wasn’t just a belief but like the most important thing to me. I’d get so obsessed it would take over everything in my life.
This happens a lot too, but I’ll think or know I did something, only to check why someone hasn’t responded and see I never sent the message. Even if I remember doing it, there’s evidence that I didn’t. I was diagnosed with DID, OCD, CPTSD, and depression. I’m starting to think DID and depression might not be true. I only have bouts of real depression every so often now, and it’s almost always for a pretty solid reason, like when my brother died or when I broke up with the love of my life. But when it happens I’ll just go numb and stop functioning.
I’ve also had what someone described to me as “word salad,” where what I said or typed out was nonsense. When I looked back at the message I sent, I couldn’t figure out what I’d been trying to say, either. And for did, sometimes I don’t switch for a long time and then I almost forget I have did. But then I think, no. My alters definitely exist as souls living in my body. That’s real. But then someone said it sounds more like delusion than actual DID.
But onto my mother. She’s always been very religious but over the years has become scary religious. Like, “I’m sinless because I have no belly button,” “I can hear God’s voice, he gave me a spiritual gift,” “I can speak in tongues,” and the classic her saying she saw visions of angels. She also became badly addicted to prescription pain killers and started hallucinating. There was an incident in a restaurant a few years ago where she thought a bug was in her food and she “stabbed it” with her fork.
Then she lifted the fork and waved it around and yelled for the waiter in anger. It was pretty awful, she made a huge scene and couldn’t be calmed down. Another time she hallucinated worms crawling all over her floor and made me “clean them up.” Then she yelled at me for kneeling bc the worms would burrow into my knees. She thought she had parasites in her brain too. Sometimes she’s convinced that I did something bad, or meant something that I didn’t, like she sees interactions that aren’t there or interprets words/actions as attacks. She can’t be convinced she’s wrong, ever. Even with clear evidence.
So, all of that to say, I asked on my dad’s side of the family and apparently they have a lot of serious mental illness on that side too. And what I’m worried about is that I might be in the beginning stages of schizophrenia. I’ve hallucinated before, a few different times. I experienced severe child abuse for a good portion of my childhood, I had a psychotic episode after a Frankenstein of a psychiatrist put me on 6 different psych meds, I had childhood epilepsy, and I know I’ve had delusions. My current therapist is great, but she’s more of a spiritual/natural remedy type person. When I told her about the hallucinations or when we switch the body/dissociate, she almost always tells me it’s from lack of sleep.
TL;DR: My mom shows signs of schizophrenia and I worry I might be at the beginning stages. I think DID was a misdiagnosis and maybe my ‘alters,’ as real as switching and they feel, might be delusions. Their voices might be hallucinations. I’m not sure. I just want to talk about it, really. I’m very isolated. My mom thinks I’m bad and that I deserved getting beaten but I didn’t do anything bad this time and I was legally protesting, they enjoyed hurting us and I can’t talk to anyone about it bc my mom thinks I was bad and deserved it but I’m not bad and I didn’t do anything bad this time to deserve the beating, I feel like I’m screaming at a wall

Hello,
First of all sorry if I am not supposed to post or if the post has the wrong format but I am really desperate.
I[27M] am in a relationship with a girl [22F] for about an year and 3 months. She had consnistent meetings with a psychiatrist and a psychologist for most of her childhood because of some anger issues. about 3 years ago she stopped and everything fell.
When I met her she was in a "good" state so I didn't noticed. But around 6 months, she tried to apply to a certain school, she didn't entered on the prefered one and everything fell.
From around that time to abou 9 months in, she had some suicidal thoughts about 1 in a month. Now she has them more frequently and I contacted family. Now, she is being set up to return to a psychiatrist .
The real question here is: how can I treat her? So, i am with her about 1/2 per week but we talked everyday. Most days now she is very negative , never responds to "Good night" texts or "I love you" and from time to time deletes her whatsapp pic ( with us in ),
EDIT: We have small alk about everyday but most days she is very "dry" and uses short sentences. I tried to give her space but she ( when in a "good" state ) tells me that she wants me to be more present and ask more. We do talk about depression when she is rational and she gets everything and really wants to search help but because of her childhood she fears to be seen as a sick patient and someone with a disease
She told me to be less of a psychiatrist and more of a boyfriend but everytime I offered help she negates everything. I am currently tryig to send good morning texts ( which most of the time she is the first to send which is a good thing) with some inspirational quotes and some chatolic podcasts ( we strictly follow the religion). The problem is, by doing this I am afraid she tries to push me away .
Any help, tips are welcome. Sorry for the long post but I am desperate and I love this girl very much
NOTE: I don't really mention she getting help its because every member of the family is giving that talk so I don't want to be that pain in the ass
EDIT: corrected my age and added note

(I’m 29afab, my mom is 50+) So, I’ve realized I have delusions and I’m not really sure how to explain it. I definitely don’t see it in the moment but looking back months or years later I’ll say, “Damn. That was some nonsense.” I’ll remember how I was completely convinced that what I was obsessed with was real beyond a doubt, and how it wasn’t just a belief but like the most important thing to me. I’d get so obsessed it would take over everything in my life, a few times to the point of it ruining my life back then.
This happens a lot too, but I’ll think or know I did something, only to check why someone hasn’t responded and see I never sent the message. Or that I just never did what I thought I did. Also I do things I don’t remember doing, which is where the DID comes in. But sometimes, even if I remember doing it, there’s evidence that I didn’t. I was diagnosed with DID, OCD, CPTSD, and depression. I’m starting to think DID and depression might not be true. I only have bouts of real depression every so often now, and it’s almost always for a pretty solid reason, like when my brother died or when I broke up with the love of my life. But when it happens I’ll just go numb and stop functioning.
I’ve also had what someone described to me as “word salad,” where what I said or typed out was nonsense. When I looked back at the message I sent, I couldn’t figure out what I’d been trying to say, either. And for DID, sometimes I don’t switch for a long time and then I almost forget I have DID. But then I think, no. My alters definitely exist as souls living in my body. That’s real. But then someone said it sounds more like delusion than actual DID. But I don’t agree with modern psychology and how they drug us with poison. Most food and medicine are poison.
But onto my mother. She’s always been very religious but over the years has become scary religious. Like, “I’m sinless because I have no belly button,” “I can hear God’s voice, he gave me a spiritual gift,” “I can speak in tongues,” and the classic her saying she saw visions of angels. She also became badly addicted to prescription pain killers and started hallucinating. There was an incident in a restaurant a few years ago where she thought a bug was in her food and she “stabbed it” with her fork.
Then she lifted the fork and waved it around and yelled for the waiter in anger. It was pretty awful, she made a huge scene and couldn’t be calmed down. There was nothing on her fork. Another time she hallucinated worms crawling all over her floor and made me “clean them up.” Then she yelled at me for kneeling bc the worms would burrow into my knees. She thought she had parasites in her brain too. Sometimes she’s convinced that I did something bad, or meant something that I didn’t, like she sees interactions that aren’t there or interprets words/actions as attacks. She can’t be convinced she’s wrong, ever. Even with clear evidence.
So, all of that to say, I asked on my dad’s side of the family and apparently they have a lot of serious mental illness on that side too. And what I’m worried about is that I might be in the beginning stages of schizophrenia. I’ve hallucinated before, a few different times. I experienced severe child abuse for a good portion of my childhood, I had a psychotic episode after a Frankenstein of a psychiatrist put me on 6 different psych meds, I had childhood epilepsy, and I know I’ve had delusions. My current therapist is great, but she’s more of a spiritual/natural remedy type person. When I told her about the hallucinations or when we switch the body/dissociate, she almost always tells me it’s from lack of sleep.
TL;DR: My mom shows signs of schizophrenia and I worry I might be at the beginning stages. I just want to talk about it, really. I’m very isolated.

Assalamualaikom wa rahmut'Allah wa barakatuhu,
A few days ago, an incident occurred that deeply saddened me. It was such to the extent that initially, I didn't know how I would keep living. I felt the world caved on me, and my heart felt so terribly heavy. Alhamdulillah, just a few days later, the pain has substantially decreased. Is it completely gone? No. But I'm certain that given perhaps a month's time, the hurt will be long gone, by the will and Mercy of Allah. All of this was due to remembrance of Allah, nothing more or less. A quote stuck with me, one made by Shaykh Al-Islam Ibn Taymiyyah, May Allah have mercy upon him; "And know that anyone who loves a thing more than Allah then it is inevitable that he be hurt by the thing he loves". My brothers and sisters, Tawhid isn't just a matter of belief and the acts of worship that typically come to mind. We don't have to prostrate to a thing to worship it. It begins within the heart. Allah SWT tells us in the Quran "Have you seen the one who has taken their own desires as their god?" (25:43) Once a thing consumes your mind and becomes the source of your happiness and dependance, it becomes similar to a god over you. You become blinded, and take any measure to keep it in your grasp. But the reality is, the happiness that you are looking for will never be achieved through anything of this life. As long as that thing remains, your happiness remains. And as long as it leaves, your happiness leaves with it. If you are enduring some type of emotional pain, know that the only ultimate solution is the remembrance of Allah. "Surely in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find comfort" (13:28) This is a promise. A promise made by Allah SWT is an everlasting promise. "Indeed, the promise of Allah is truth" (30:60) You have to start off from the base. A strong foundation makes for a strong house. And the foundation of Iman in Allah is Tawhid. Take time to understand this and let it really soak in, and I promise you by Allah that any pain you are feeling will greatly minimize. Do that which pleases Allah. Perfect your prayers, perfect your character, perfect your manners with everyone around you. Increase in dhikr, and often ask for Allah's forgiveness. And remember additionally that happiness is not the state of being we should strive for, but contentment. True inner peace. Don't chase after these temporary dopamine rushes. You will find yourself going from an unnatural sense of happiness to an unnatural sense of sadness, and this is not normal. It will eventually burn you out and leave you depressed. Keep these things in mind in Sha Allah, and I ask Allah to uplift whatever difficulty you are enduring and replace it with ease.

Hi everyone,
I have known this person since I was 12 yo, she always have been controling and childish like being upset at me for having others friends and not hangout with her as much, so we fought a lot and with time I got feed up with her behavior and I started to cut her of, but everytime we stop talking for months she cames back again everytime, even if I caused a big problem that's unforgivable she will always come back to my life with one way or other. In the first year of high school I cut off all my friends including her cuz I was dealing with depression, so we didn't talk for the all high school period, and she didn't try to comeback cuz I treated her very bad just to make sure that she won't comeback in my life again, but soon after graduating she forgot everything and be friended me again and at the time I was feeling guilty about the way I treated her so I allowed it, and I thought that things maybe changed and she wouldn't use me again or be upset about anything I do or I say.
We were alright, but I noticed that she only talk or come visit me when she needs something and she never attempt to ask about me or how I am without having a reason that benefits her, even if she knew that I'm dealing with something she never asks except if she needed something or someone to talk to about her problems.
A week ago, she visited me and start talking about one of her exs, they broke up two years ago, but she told me that she missed him, and asked me to message him just to know if there is someone in his life, and because I don't know him personally I refused hardly and I tried to convince her to not think about him anymore cuz it's not healthy for her, but she got upset at me and said that I'm not a good friend and if I asked to do so she will do it without question (note: I have never asked anything from her ever, accept forgiveness for the way I treated her back at the time, cuz to this day I still feel guilty about it), she went home upset and I didn't think much about it cuz that's the right thing to do.
Until yesterday, her mom called me asking to visit her urgently, I went and her mom was crying and told me her daughter lost her vision, she blind now. I went to her room and she was in a terrible situation, she was looking at one direction in the room with tears in her eyes, I started talking to her and comforting her, even if it was hard for me cuz I was sad seeing her in that situation. Then her mom taked me a side and told me that the doctor told her that she have a mental problem cuz her eyes is fine so she figured that her ex is the cause of that, cuz the night before she was thinking about him and telling her mom about how he is the perfect one for her and no one's like him and she wish she can have him back, but the mother think other wise so that got her really angry and maybe that what causes her losing her sight.
So her mom asked me to talk to him and tell him what happened to her and see how he gonna react to it, if he reacted poorly then she will know that he is bad for her and she will stop think highly of him. First, I was hesitant but she convinced me, and I did (big mistake I know), that ex is their neighbor, so he knows me but not in a personal level I never talk or even looked at him, so when I called him, I said that I'm his ex's friend and I heard that she is blind and if he knows what happened to her exactly cuz I lost contact with her, the poor guy was shocked just as me when I first saw her in room, but he said that he knows nothing and he can't contact her, cuz she blocked him from everything and she acts like she doesn't know him every time they meet eye to eye (note: he only know that I'm her friend but he doesn't know which friend) at the end he told me if he heard something he will tell me and I should do so too, cuz he is worried about her. Hearing that she was happy and she told me that I should tell her everything cuz he will definitely message me .
I went home feeling terrible about her situation and what I have done, at night he messaged me asking if there is any news and I told him that I talked to her mother and what the doctor said to her, he said he have no way to talk to her but he will be praying for her. After she called me at 1am asking if he called or anything and I told her what he said and she was upset saying that I should have convinced him to visit her instead she said and I quote " I did all of this just to make him talk to me and you didn't try to convince him to do so" even if I tried by saying that it's alright to talk to her mom cuz they are neighbors.
I didn't slept all night thinking about the situation and I may have been played by her and her mom, or maybe her mom is played by her too cuz she is the only child so her mom can't say NO. Maybe she is fooling everyone just to get her ex's attention, and I feel super bad for myself, her mom and the ex, but I'm afraid that she may be really blind and I'm overthinking it, but in the other hand if I woke up blind my only concern will be my health not other people and I won't ask anyone to do something like this ever, that what make me feel like she is lying at us and we all being manipulated by her.
While writing this she called me, she still didn't get her vision back and she asked me not to talk to him until she asks me to, and to not delete my conversation with him.
I know I'm a bad person for doing what I have done, I feel terrible about the situation, and I wish to find a way to cut her from my life, cuz she traumatized me everytime, and I have tried everything in my power but she always come back, but what if she lost her sight for real and by doing so I will be more bad, cuz I won't be happy if my friends left me if I had health problem. I don't know what to do anymore.

• They start out by talking about how they are similar people, they both say what they are thinking and present their very real selves online which causes a lot of backlash
• KB asks what Maria was doing prior to being on the Bach?
• Maria worked for her families sprinkle company, they make sprinkles like the toppings lol Maria's Dad owned a chocolate factory prior so now they do this and Maria was his assistant
• KB asks Maria what made her nervous about doing their interview?
• Maria says that she was always a fan of KB and "wanted to be a Kaitlyn" if she went on the show. She was nervous about the interview because they are already comfy with one another so she wasn't sure what she was going to say.
• Maria tells KB that she actually went to one of her wine events a while ago and they met and took a shot together, KB says she remembers but also didn't remember lol
• Maria went on the show wanting to be different, be herself fully and push the limits

Maria's Storyline/Edit on the show

• KB says she didn't watch the season but that it really blew up and it seems like the show is fully back
• KB asks Maria if she thinks the drama on the show was portrayed accurately?
• Maria says she felt like the edit was very true to how it all happened. She said some girls claim they got bad edits but from her perspective it was a very honest edit
• Maria said that she didn't have anyone in the house coming to her defense but that she had also told the girls she was close with that they should just stay out of it and not come to her defense. The audience really had her back which was a nice feeling
• Maria says KB walked so she could run, feels like KB was very different on the show from the "norm" and opened the door for less perfect women to be on
• Maria asks KB if she has brothers?
• KB says she has a sister that feels like a brother. Says her and her sister both have dude energy "alpha energy", Maria says she does too. KB says she has girlfriends but loves guy energy

Talking about Maria wanting to go on the show

• KB brings up how Maria has stated she wanted to go on the show and that others say it's the wrong reasons. KB says she went on the show to build a brand/career and move forward in life. She doesn't think it's a bad thing, she went on to build a brand and also was open to falling in love
• KB asks about Marias thoughts on that?
• Maria says she has been open and honest about how she has always wanted to be on the show. She says people were responding well to that because she was honest about it. She wasn't asked to be on, she was asking what to do to get on
• Maria mentions Nick saying that she kept asking him to get her on the show. She says no, she did this all on her own. She says he put it out there like it was a dig but she had already been open about wanting to be on the show so she felt it didn't land
• Maria loved the show and was so open to it and felt the timing was perfect when she did go on because she felt ready for it
• As soon as she found out it was Joey, Maria contacted a producer she had been in contact with prior asking her to put her in the running to be on the season. 3 days prior to filming starting they called her and told her to pack and get ready to go
• Maria says every person on the show knows what they are doing and they want to be on the show, Maria is just one of the only people being honest about that

Jenn as Bachelorette

• Maria says she wants to clarify what she said about Jenn on another podcast. Jenn and Maria got really close after the show they were facetiming all the time and talking about wanting to be in relationships and how ready they were for that.
• Maria says during filming Jenn was giving it her all, dropping all walls and putting her full self into this
• Maria says Jenn was so ready to get engaged and get to the next stage of her life, and that is all she meant by what she said is that she is ready for that role
• She wasn't saying that Jenn was in the house talking about wanting to be bachelorette
• Maria says she wasn't super present on social media when the announcement was made because she wanted to make sure Jenn got love and support, all she wanted was for Jenn to get her chance
• She says Nick tried to make it seem like Maria said Jenn only got the opportunity because Maria turned it down but that she didn't mean it like that at all, she says it is Jenns opportunity and it was given to her
• KB says Nick knows that there is usually 4-5 people they will think about for the lead
• Maria asks if they can talk about Rob Mills, Maria says he is the coolest man on earth and KB says she loves him
• Maria says she told Rob Mills that Jenn is perfect for the lead because not only is she so ready for this she will also be important for representation. She is frustrated that her words got twisted into it seeming like she wasn't supportive of Jenn because all she wants is for Jenn to be successful. She wants to be able to share her story and how it unfolded for her while also being fully supportive of Jenn

Maria being offered the bachelorette/KBs time on the bachelor

• KB asks Maria if she regrets turning down bachelorette?
• Maria says no, she put her mental health first and wasn't ready for it and stands by her decision
• KB says she never thought they would pick her for bachelorette, Maria says she thought KB always had it in the bag
• KB says she was probs the most confident in her life when she was on the show and has gone backwards now
• KB says after her breakup with Shawn she said she would never date someone from the franchise again but obviously that wasn't true. She says they are all so attractive and also understand what the experience is like and what they have been through

Random off show stuff/One Direction???

• KB says she was in an athlete era and Maria asks if she was a "puck bunny" and they joke about it for a little while
• Maria is talking about how she would go downtown and go to concerts and meet people/go to after parties with them. What she has always said and done is to never sleep with them, "you want to hang out with them, become friends with them and be the girl they could never get"
• Maria is talking about knowing people (in bands? i don't know this lore sorry), and there was someone on tiktok telling false stories of her Dad being in a band and that's how she knows certain band members but that it's not true
• Maria says (I am going to fully translate this because I am a little lost and confused on the point): "The reality of it is that when you meet people you know, they know people who know people and then you just need to be the girl that never gets touched by these people so that they allow you to be around. And so I've been around them yes, yes. Have I hung around with certain band mates? Sure."
• KB asks which ones, Harry?
• Maria says she has met Harry and has a really funny story with Harry. Her Dad had a meeting in NY so she went with him, her friends told her that 1D was in NY staying at a specific hotel so she talked her Dad into staying at that hotel. Maria says she was walking to the elevators in the hotel and a bunch of fan girls were there screaming because Harry was going into the elevator, the security blocks anyone from going up but Maria had to pee and was a paying customer at the hotel so she gave them the finger and Harry laughed a ton. The security guard came back down and told Maria that Harry thought it was the funniest thing ever and wanted to meet her, so she got to meet Harry later that night. It was a very respectful and sweet meeting.
• Maria talks about being super into Evan Peters

Would Maria date someone in BN?

• Maria met Tyler at stagecoach (among other celebs) she says everyone wants them together but it isn't like that, nothing going on with that
• Maria doesn't think she would date anyone in BN because people (fans) take it to next level, even if she just takes a photo with someone to be nice people run with it
• KB mentions that when Maria took a photo with Jason she got so many DMs from people saying that Maria looked too comfy with Jason
• KB says that everyone asks her if she is gay now because she takes photos with Katie from VPR
• Maria says that a lot of people are calling her a bisexual queen, and she just lets people say whatever at this point

What is a period of Marias life where she was at rock bottom or experienced a lot of growth

• Maria says she had gotten into a really bad car accident in 2018 that was extremely traumatic
• She went into a really bad depressive episode where she was pushing everyone away, she doesn't like to talk about it a lot because it puts her back in that space
• She says the mindset she was in was something she had never experienced before and she wanted to be alone
• Maria says she walked away from the car accident perfectly fine but looking at her car you would think she most likely died
• This is part of the reason she didn't want to entertain the little petty fights in the bachelor house because there are much bigger things to be worried about in life

Nick

• KB asks how Maria knew/met Nick?
• Maria and her friends were fans of the show and liked Nick. They started talking through social media and would literally talk all the time, and would build a friendship
• KB says she did that too with him, and asks if her and Maria ever met in person?
• Maria says yes they met in person, he had told her when he was going to be the bachelor etc
• They would always communicate/found their way back to communicating and it was always friendly
• KB asks if Nick played a role in Maria being on the show?
• Maria says absolutely not
• KB asks how Maria feels about Nicks wife calling her delusional
• Maria says "to each their own". Maria says she made a comment about a conspiracy theory she had, she meant it as a full joke. Nick had told her she would be a villain on the show and she wasn't sure what it meant to be a villain. Then she gets off the show and had a girl villainize her an entire season for no reason, and then she saw a photo of them together and made a joke about how it was weird they knew each other. She wasn't being serious and she was just shooting the shit on CHD and making jokes, but Nick super ran with it.
• KB asks if something went south in Maria's relationship with Nick? If it was all fine why does he seem to want to talk shit with her.
• Maria says that is a good question, she said nice things about Nick on CHD they didn't have any sort of falling out prior they had stopped talking but just because it was natural not because anything happened between them. He didn't say anything bad about her during the season (KB interjects that Nick didn't say anything about her at all). Maria says that she would prefer him to breeze past her then talk shit about her so she was fine with it, but then after the CHD interview it all changed.
• Maria says she didn't know the timeline of his wedding, nothing she said was because he was getting married or anything like that
• Maria said her only goal was to clear up rumors and put that all to rest, she had nothing to hide, she wasn't the one that went through and unliked a bunch of instagram photos which caused the rumors
• Maria says to quote Kendrick Lamar "don't tell lies about me and I won't tell truths about you"

Sometimes I see tiktoks that share beautiful scenes and cute quotes from romance books but when I go to read the resume, reviews, and trigger warnings like cheating and SA between main characters I found out that it is a fucked up story with cheating plots (like literal cheating, not some misunderstanding ) and the characters are so bad and toxic without character growth. so I end up not reading the book. My question is: is it ok to feel so upset and sometimes even depressed only by reading the reviews and the triggers? And why promote those stories as healthy and cute?
Edit: I can read romances that are a bit dark but do not contain heavy triggers like cheating and sexual or physical abuse between main characters...

I am new to this mbti and enneagram stuff, but I did look into cognitive functions a bit but I still am not sure which fit me, it might be because I am still pretty new. This is mostly a hobby for when I am bored and want to think, because I like to play with outside systems like this.
• How old are you? What's your gender? Give us a general description of yourself.
I am 16 years old, male , just your average quiet teenager that sucks at introspecting and wants to look cool to others yet does nothing to impress others (other than looks)
that sounded oddly specific.,.....
whatever
• Is there a medical diagnosis that may impact your mental stability somehow?
not really, not that I know of..
• Describe your upbringing. Did it have any kind of religious or structured influence? How did you respond to it?
I grew up in a poor family (duh), then just like your average adult couple they divorce, usually I'd stay a lot with my mother and she would teach me about morals which I now see some as stupid but either way I kind of "took" her morals and my dad's too. Kind of had to grew up early and take care of my smaller brother by substituting being a dad , and I have a lot of influence over my brother , and we would switch places a lot but the only comfort I had was in games, interacting with others on the games ,making fun of others and overall having a good time being accepted
• What do you do as a job or as a career (if you have one)? Do you like it? Why or why not?
At the moment I have no job, I do karate and I could teach others but I don't have the stuff necessary like: a place to train others, I am not at the highest level yet, customers and this is mostly the main things.
But I would really like to continue on this path of gym and karate since I already have an edge and kind of be under someone's wing to help me
• If you had to spend an entire weekend by yourself, how would you feel? Would you feel lonely or refreshed?
Mostly depends, on my mood sometimes I despise being alone and feel miserable being alone with my thoughts(and is mostly why I spend a lot of time on my computer despite not wanting to do so) or if the people in my circle kind of make me have a bad time then I would want to withdraw and get my energy back , usually I am very loud after I get comfortable with the other person and know what they are capable of
• What kinds of activities do you prefer? Do you like, and are you good at sports? Do you enjoy any other outdoor or indoor activities?
Like I said above I do Karate , I recently reached the brown belt ( YIPPPIE me) and me and the outdoors have a bad history but as of now I prefer to have a balance of both but mostly I would like to focus on real life things, especially when it comes to careers
• How curious are you? Do you have more ideas then you can execute? What are your curiosities about? What are your ideas about - is it environmental or conceptual, and can you please elaborate?
I am not too curious of stuff that is deep , it makes me feel miserable, but usually I get random questions sometimes and it makes me search , but not too deep into it just enough to have the idea cause I see no point in diving deeper. Usually when I even get these questions is from either talking out loud or just looking around me so it's mostly environmental (I think not too sure of this)
• Would you enjoy taking on a leadership position? Do you think you would be good at it? What would your leadership style be?
The only time I like leading is when I have knowledge and know I am the best to do it, if someone else is better then I'll let them do their thing but usually I wouldn't fully obey them I would kind of give some counter-arguments if there is room for some.
Even when I lead, others do listen to me and usually I am confident in doing it, kind of like that one quote of Sun Tzu:" Go to war only if you know you will win" , which my friend told me recently.
As for the style not too sure what it would really reference, but I would say I think of people as cogs in the machine
• Are you coordinated? Why do you feel as if you are or are not? Do you enjoy working with your hands in some form? Describe your activity?
Not too sure what to say on the "coordination" part but I for sure love working with my hands, especially when I cook for myself or others, and like I already mentioned I do karate so of course I like practicing with my hands improving my technique
• Are you artistic? If yes, describe your art? If you are not particular artistic but can appreciate art please likewise describe what forums of art you enjoy. Please explain your answer.
no I am not artistic at all , I don't really look into it at all since I don't consider it worthwhile but as a kid I did like drawing cause I was good at it and I got recognition for my drawings from other classmates and that would fuel me to make me like drawing cause the teacher liked it, others too and yeah.. Untill it kind of stopped receving the feedback and such
• What's your opinion about the past, present, and future? How do you deal with them?
I don't like to think of the past too much , especially when I think of myself, it's mostly negative things but I try to see the bright side of what I've achieved and such, because I wasn't healthy (even now I feel like I am not healthy but it's clearly better), I used to be chubby kind of fat , and before getting into karate I did handball where we trained physical condition and other things , and we had to do sit ups but due to me being fat I couldn't and others looked at me and started joking even the trainer and because of that I quit..
The present could be good but I am indifferent towards it I don't really work towards anything specific I like to remain a little reactive and eventually get help from others into shaping my future life.
And like I said I try to remain reactive of the present, I don't like planning too far ahead because it could be too early to plan and there might be more to do
• How do you act when others request your help to do something (anything)? If you would decide to help them, why would you do so?
I don't get asked for help frequently but it's either I help the person because I see they are struggling or they asked me and it goes two ways: 1. I agree and do the job or 2. I tell them "no" and go back to what I was doing (eventually feeling guilty I didn't help but I don't like being used for other's advantage)
• Do you need logical consistency in your life?
Yeah , it's pretty important people shouldn't only run on feelings but kind of fit some systems into some kind of framework, not really think about it 24/7, but make sense of it that is how I like to do it.
Even with this system of cognitive functions I try to understand it but sometimes it's a bit too abstract, I prefer more practical examples to fully understand the idea behind it
• How important is efficiency and productivity to you?
Not too much but not too less, usually I prefer it to not be feeling sad that I am "closed off somewhere" and not doing something, isolated from the world , especially with no computer atleast to go on the internet and joke around and chill with others(but of on a common task or else I will mind my business).
But I strive to be efficient in what I do over time , even if it's for a game that is pointless
• Do you control others, even if indirectly? How and why do you do that?
Simply no, I never was able to do this exactly , well maybe after I get to know the person a bit and see what they could do.... but I am not.
Also just read what controlling others mean , and I could see myself taking charge and just doing everything myself....
But I still feel like I don't, but I can see how I could, but I won't because I don't have the skill and it wouldn't be good
• What are your hobbies? Why do you like them?
Well probably just ,out of boredoom, playing games but not a wide variety which gets boring quick but familiarity bias is a thing.. and doing karate which energizes me almost everytime and anytime even if I don't feel like it and force myself. I just like when it goes well with others it and being liked by others, energizes me
• What is your learning style? What kind of learning environments do you struggle with most? Why do you like/struggle with these learning styles? Do you prefer classes involving memorization, logic, creativity, or your physical senses?
To be honest I didn't really pay attention to how I learn I just learn to get good grades in school and make it, yeah not too much here but I struggle with things that don't really add up to me or I don't see the logic behind
Usually I don't need explanations from the teacher I kind of tend to see the logic behind everything mostly without asking much information since some subjects have systems that are easily to juggle with(like math but I sometimes struggle with calculating in my head)
• How good are you at strategizing? Do you easily break up projects into manageable tasks? Or do you have a tendency to wing projects and improvise as you go?
I try to simplify strategizing, yes having a plan in depth is good but people for sure won't like if you are gonna stick to one rigid plan , which is why you have to make it kind of like a team thing even if I do make a rigid plan I try to make it sound simple and to the point based of data that others and I know, even making decision off the data my group knows
• What are your aspirations in life, professionally and personally?
Probably to feel happy I achieved something and doing something in the outside world, eventually influencing others
• What are your fears? What makes you uncomfortable? What do you hate? Why?
Mostly personal stuff , and emotional situations, my emotional inteligence is bad and I am bad at emotions too, atleast handling the emotions of others, but sometimes I try to let them vent to me and help them a bit and try to be empathetic even tho I don't show it too much, mostly I show it through acting tho
• What do the "highs" in your life look like?
Positive outlook on life, relationships are well but I don't worry about them too much unless there is an obvious problem and really liking to hang around others, and especially having something going on for myself
• What do the "lows" in your life look like?
the first thing that comes to my mind is: withrdawn, melancholy and just starting to critique everyone in my head but not really telling them, yeah sometimes I may start bluntly joking about other's and stuff and even situtations, I try to poke fun and when it kind of fails I feel like withdrawing from others since it doesn't work Melancholy litteraly makes me feel miserable about everything, mostly makes me feel depressed. I do tend to feel it often but I try to supress it trough doing things, like playing on the computer , youtube and such (everyone does this to some extent)
• How attached are you to reality? Do you daydream often, or do you pay attention to what's around you? If you do daydream, are you aware of your surroundings while you do so?
I find myself daydreaming when bored and not really anything is going on but I do tend to be mindful of what others do in case they try to harm me...
But even if I daydream it's mostly about what everything could have been, kind of like what I could have done or what I could do and how it would end up/ ended up, but it does happen quite a lot
• Imagine you are alone in a blank, empty room. There is nothing for you to do and no one to talk to. What do you think about?
Not too sure if I would ever get there but thinking out loud here so , probably about some random stuff in my head unrelated to my situations untill one thought hits close to home and I go into some deeper stuff , and usually when I get deeper into things I tend to feel miserable, my friend (who is INTJ btw) said that my negative depressing thoughts that I hate match the thinking of the philosophy of "Nihilism" which is kind of true....
• How long do you take to make an important decision? And do you change your mind once you've made it?
I try and not stay too long on it but sometimes I might run back and forth if I am not too sure, but I try to stay decisive , because being indecisive a lot is bad..
• How long do you take to process your emotions? How important are emotions in your life?
I kind of look down on emotions , yes I feel them but I just tend to ignore and repress them sometimes, but I vent to closer friends from time to time, but this is mostly because my parents would misinterpret my emotions...
My mom would just over moralify everything and bring it to a stupid extreme which is unrelated..
and My dad would just make fun of them , but sometimes he would give me spot on answers which are exactly what I need
• Do you ever catch yourself agreeing with others just to appease them and keep the conversation going? How often? Why?
Not really , even if I do it's in a way to shut off the conversation, because I don't like having conversation with no point
• Do you break rules often? Do you think authority should be challenged, or that they know better? If you do break rules, why?
I don't really mind rules , but I don't pay attention to them too much(because no need to worry if you don't go out of your way to try something that could count as "breaking the rules") mostly to the general ones which could punish you very harshly but overtime they could be exploited and I do that when I am confident I won't be caught or it won't punish me
I also took the mbti test from Michael Caloz site (I saw people doing this one a lot so I figured I might give it a try for this post :D)
statistics of functions
the top result (followed by ESTP and then ESTJ, in that order)
I saw other posts also mentioning this, and I figured I would too
I took this test a bit rushed cause I needed to do something..

https://www.sltrib.com/religion/2024/05/14/no-easy-answers-lds-parents-wonder
Might be behind a paywall, I have JavaScript turned off on the page so I can read it anyway 😅 I'll put up some quotes and give a tl dr: basically tons of research shows that waking up early as a teen is extremely bad for your mental health, but the church doesn't care.

A mounting body of evidence indicates that teens not only need more sleep than adults but also that hormonal shifts make it harder for them to go to bed before 10 or 11p.m. At the same time, researchers have gained a clearer picture of the risks associated with teenage sleep deprivation, among them serious mental health issues and substance abuse.
Tired teens, recent studies have discovered, are more prone to major depression and risky behavior, including drug experimentation. One study, published in 2023, found that sleep-deprived adolescents were about twice as prone to suicide ideation and consideration, even when adjusting for sexual identity, trauma, bullying and other related factors. Another, published the year before, suggested a possible link between poor adolescent sleep and an increased risk of schizophrenia.

The church won't make any changes, and the parents and kids are brainwashed into thinking it's worth the "sacrifice". They have other options, like online or late night classes, but since they're not the norm kids and parents still feel the pressure to keep the status quo and do regular seminary. It's a classic "cultural" problem where the church refuses to acknowledge the influence it has on the problems it causes.
My two cents: I definitely don't have any lasting sleep disorders exacerbated by seminary /s 🙄 Jazz band at my high school was before school, my freshman year I just went to seminary instead, but then we tried having seminary just for a handful of band kids after school. For whatever reason by my junior year we switched to extra early seminary at 5:45am (I know a ton of people that had it that early as well in other districts and states). I slept through every class that wasn't active (like band or drafting) every single day of that year and the next. I even had to drop out of honors pre-calculus because I just couldn't stay awake.
The kids in most classes referred to me as "that sleeping kid". Though to be fair it was pretty funny when I got the second highest score on the practice AP physics test and the guy who sits next to me was like "what?? He's asleep ALL THE TIME" (I didn't do as well on the actual test though 😅).
And now in my thirties it's almost impossible to even get out of bed without Adderall or a large amount of caffeine, and it's impossible to get to sleep without Ambien or a large amount of weed (and yes, that includes days where I didn't take stimulants, and vice versa). This research on how much sleep teens actually need is almost a decade old, and some high schools have even pushed back their start times because of it (and consequently saw a noticeable bump in their test scores). And the church still won't address this issue that's actually harming kids. They either don't care about the kids outside of Utah or really appreciate how much easier brainwashing is when you're sleep deprived.

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It's a Bird is a 2004 Graphic Novel by Steven T. Seagle. It is about Seagle being offered writing duties on the Superman comic and his despair at this. You see Seagle doesn't identify with Superman. He hates him as a character who is perfect in literally every way and therefore unwritable. He's under a time limit before the comic is offered to other writers. The book is about how he came to find a window into understanding Superman through his own personal medical circumstances.
Sounds riveting right? Yep, just as it sounds. The artstyle is washed out colour and for at least the first 50 pages of a 132 page book, I was rather bored senseless as things seemed to be going nowhere.
And then there were a couple of pages which gave me a revelation. Mr. Seagle is an INTP and It's a Bird is, on the surface, about his struggles with Superman, but under the surface is a literal graphic representation of the INTP thought process.
I've written this out a few times and tried to link to images of the pages, and automod keeps deleting the posts, so I'm gonna have to do quotes of speech bubbles. Edit. Reddit formatting is a pain. Different scenes are separated by -------

Seagle: "One thing writers have in common is the need to procrastinate. People don't really understand this, but it's not avoiding work. It IS work."
Seagle's Girlfriend Lisa: "What's wrong? And Don't say 'Nothing' or I'll pour this on your receding hairline"
Seagle: "This... guy on the train... construction worker. He was asking me all these questions about comics. He was going on and on about justice and super heroes but he... he had no idea what he was talking about."
Lisa: "Wait, aren't you always complaining that no one is interested in comics anymore? This guy was interested but that's a problem too?"
Seagle: "This is the face I make... when Lisa repeats things I'd previously said to prove that what I'm saying now contradicts what I said before. Doesn't she understand that I'm trying to be depressed and angry? And that logic is only going to get in the way of that?"
"Why do you always side with the people I'm complaining about? I'm your well-educated boyfriend and this guy was a construction worker. He obviously doesn't..."

Lisa: Oh, so his opinion matters less because he works with his hands? Supposedly 'all men are created equal'. When did you get so superior?"

Seagle: "I... I... I'm going to stay at my brother's for a while."
Lisa: "What? You hardly even talk to your brother. Why? Wait are you saying you're moving out?"
Seagle: "I need quiet. I can't think here. I can't... work."
Lisa: "And the reason you can't work is me? Isn't it you who says "Ideas come from everywhere?" Everywhere but me I guess. You can't write Superman because I'm bothering you too much?"
Seagle: "Even Superman has his fortress of solitude"
Lisa: "Do not even start talking comic book crap to me as a justification for your lame behaviour."
Seagle: "What? It's the first thing I've related to about him... A place to go and just THINK. A place not to be badgered 24 hours a day by people who have to know everything about him."
Lisa: "I badger you? Asking if you're alright is having to know everything about...? You know what? You stay and I'll go."
Seagle: "I want to stop her... but her heartbreak is easier to accept than my own."
Seagle then stays in bed for weeks, ignoring all phone calls until everyone thinks he is dead.

Eventually Seagle does have a redemption arc, I won't spoil it but it does make the slog through the first half of the book somewhat worth it. In the grand scheme of things, the story of a writer overcoming writer's block really isn't worth much, but in terms of visualisation of the INTP thought process - especially for people who don't understand INTPs, this book is fucking gold. This should be on the bookshelf of all INTPs. Highly recommended. Especially to people with a Lisa in their life.
So. Do you relate to Superman?

A conversation with a few friends of mine some skins have certain audiences to them and certain people will pick them more than others that's just the nature of people, and sometimes these people can be fit into certain groups, and certain stereotypes which is also nature of people. So I will be talking about these stereotypes, with 4-8 champs at a time depending on how many skins they have, starting with- Not androxus- but some general skin types etc.
Let me start off by saying that stereotypes are broad, and over generalized by nature, and not everyone is the same we're not Buzz Lightyear here, at the very least these are meant for fun.

Basic Recolours

The recolours you can buy for gold often attract semi-new players those that got the champions they like and often will spend "extra" gold on recolours.
They're most likely new at the game, or at the very least their champion.
Certain recolours will be brought up again per champion if they add anything different or have a different stereotype.

System Recolours/Promotional Recolours

So these guys probably are more likely to be even newer than the basic recolours since they got them from linking accounts or following/subscribing to different social media and all that.

Mastery/Gold Skins

Assuming it's gold they're probably confident in their skill with a champion and want to display that, but with the obsidian and cosmic ones they tend to be the same as basic and promotional recolours.

Invitational/Event Recolours

Okay so we're done with recolours after this I promise but often these are old school players, often ignoring the actual quality of skins to more say that's when they were around.

Hats

Hats are kinda the same as the event/invitation recolours but they can also be found on new players who got the hat from a chest, in general if they have a proper skin they'll dump these for the skin so at the very least that leaves semi experienced players who finds the frog hat more funny than they do the cowboy cool.

Androxus

It's fair to say that Android is the poster boy of paladins and since he's relatively old he's got a lot of skins over the years and he's got quite the audience, I mean really he's the guy they show on the splash art of the game like imagine little Timmy seeing his older brother playing Androgenous "Who's the cool guy with the revolver and horns?" And his brother is like "That's my main Abolitionist" and then next game Timmy is playing Angrosist.
And they're very against nerfs every time pretending it'll kill Ambrosia and every time he's just fine maybe the fact he's got a solid baseline kit means he's not struggling when nerfs come knocking. Either way it doesn't stop the complaints.
Often Anglo (Okay the bits running thin) players take themselves seriously, whether you should depends, and depends alot. But he does inevitably attract edgelords, assholes, and blowhards.

Exalted

Exalted Andros tend to hold themselves in high regard but at the same time tend to suck, they bought this skin since it was cheap and with it are often not that great.

Imperator

So imperator is basically the same as exalted in looks but it does have the caveat that it's actually not as readily available which means someone has to make a active choice to run this, these guys are pretty much more for simplicity and class over complexity and fancy stuff, this means you'll see them play pretty good Andro where they'll stick to the stuff that works rather than flashy montage worthy stuff, they can do these but they more prefer understated competency over flashy nonsense.

Screech

This is a hat that actually has a stereotype since it's not apart of a chest it's from the deal of the day that makes a difference to who is using it. These guys are mostly raging blowhards, they think they're gods at the game but they're not as good as they believe, like antlers they say crap but not enough to get banned. This changes to just normal tryhards when they get their hands on shattermaw, almost every Andro with this skin and shattermaw are more interested in shitting on you and moving on to the next, they really only do really good in casuals without comms, but they can get work done in ranked.

Cangaceiro

Okay so this guy either uses the Shatter Maw and same deal as Screech Andro's or they run they Huntsman's gun and if you get to talk to them in a party or something they'll cry about how the pirate skins in Paladins Strike aren't ported over to paladins. It's weird and it's specific. They do tend to be nicer and less serious than Screech Andros.

Huntsman

These are the most average Andro's in existence, they certainly exist but they're not too interesting all considering. They're not bad or good, or particularly toxic or nice or anything like that, they just exist.

Steam Demon

I mean there's a Young Frankenstein joke to be made here. But Andro's running the steam demon skin tend to be uptight and expect people to carry their own weight... Of course the chance they tend to mess up they go silent, they're not rude perse but they sure do expect a lot.

Fallen

These are the guys who listened to Nightcore- Angel with a shotgun too much and will be very melodramatic, and tend to be almost always a downer for the team, they do clutch up though so something to be said.

Battlesuit Godslayer

No one really uses this skin if they have others, really this skin doesn't sell the gundam vibes the others do maybe it's because of his waistcost flowing back there but really he just looks like a guy in a robot suit

Steelforged/Dragonforged

These Andros are just as dramatic as Fallen Andros but they seem to be in on the joke and often will more be self aware, they will be playing like some viking bagpipe metal music so it's not all good with them.

Avatar

These guys probably blame their support and will unironically quots the skin, not realizing it's making fun of them. They also probably are tickled by the fact it looks likr a Xbox 360

Modded

Now often with battlepass skins their recolours are basically the same stereotype normally but for Modded these guys have basically brain rotten themselves down to the same level with their obsession with RGB lights.

Exterminate

Yeah another skin no one uses really, unless they're really interested in the cat in his backpack otherwise it's just not really a great skin since it's just a guy in a dragon ball z kai uniform without the cool ass powers and literal royalty free music.

Grave Danger

This is Kinda like omen it's not as self aware but it's hard to take this skin more seriously than default and these guys tend to be chill but it's a newer skin so it's not exactly like there's room to have a stereotype yet, which is fair but still other skins still have stereotypes that formed same day as their release.

Golden

Now it's rare that a gold skin that doesn't change something about a character shows up but this is widespread since every Andro on earth who runs this will almost always have a bloated ego, whether it's 50 or 550 these guys are super quick to be offended and will tunnel the shit out of you for just about anything.

Ash

Ash is weirdly uncommon despite being free, probably because everyone is running at point with her and she basically loses that engagement to every proper point tank, she is a offtank first and foremost after all.
As for stereotypes there is a few thing that I've noticed with Ash's (Ashes? Ashs? Ash players) First is if they're running the default voice pack even with other skins they're definitely offtanking.
And another oddity is the Ash mains that have more than one skin tend to never properly match their weapons and skins up, it's weird but every other Ash main I see runs a different weapon and skin.

Heirloom Crest

So I bring this hat up because unlike anyone else with a hat skin no one wears this, honestly it should just come with a different version of Ronin but really this is the exception to the hatskin rule, these guys are just new players who got it from a chest and felt justified in using it because they spent crystals on a chest.

Ronin

Ronin Ash players kinda just suck, it can be a matter of many different things as to why these guys struggle, they could suck at shooting people, they could be bad at positioning, trying to point tank, they're using their abilities at shit times, they could be great with all of that and still they'll have a terrible deck and talents.
These guys just suck

Xenobuster

Xenobuster Ash players tend to run into fights they shouldn't and lose, this more or less comes from the overuse of shoulder bash, otherwise they're probably running knock back spam, they're most likely to be found on TDM Throne or Abyss trying to wait around corners to throw you off. They will go spastic if you buy sentinel.

Street Style

These guys are meatheats, they're less interested in actually capturing the point and more just want teamfights, the objective and space are biproducts, as such you'll see these guys with really selfish buys, and decks, and they'll steal kills with slugshot, they're not doing it intentionally but they are rude.

Ska'Drin

Ska'Drin Ash players often properly play Ash as offtank and for the most part are good sports, it's nice enough at least when these guys are working with you, they will probably ask for someone to point tank while they do their thing.

Scorned

Another recolour with a different stereotype, these guys are also playing Ash as offtanks but their also raging assholes, and will bitch and moan from just about anything, whether it's their fault or not they'll yell at their team, though at the same time they are probably making space, and do their job well enough

Draconian Huntress

As mentioned earlier Ash mains tend to be rather rare, and the amount of people who'd go out of their way for this skin is rarer, these guys pretty much are guaranteed to be Ash mains or at the very least skin collectors. As for gameplay it's hard to say since I've seen like 4 people use this skin

Atlas

Atlas mains are pretty much obsessed with telling you they're Atlas mains it's like telling people you don't play fortnite or something. Like good on you mate, but I and I'm pretty sure most of the world don't really care. Skill ranges wildly and skins for the most part don't really change that.

Chronomancer

So uh this skin no one uses, you'll more likely find a Atlas running default with this Skin's gun, it's weird it's specific and I have no idea why it's like this... Oh yeah because Atlas looks awful without a beard.

Legionnaire

So Legionnaire Atlas is kinda a situation like Grave Danger Andro mostly because the skin again looks kind of goofy, though for the effort put into it, it's at least nice. Still these guys take themselves just as seriously as the skin does.

Corrupt/Vile

Most of these guys just suck like sure there's bound to be a good Corrupt or Vile Atlas out there but every one I've seen just sucks. It's a bloody shame since they're nice skins.

Azaan

Azaan doesn't really have too many skins to talk about but at the same time most people aren't exactly Azaan mains he's kind of a back pocket kind of champion.

Forgemaster

These guys actually main Azaan, and they're quick to get defensive on why they pick the shirtless Azaan skin

Dark Drake

I don't get how anyone understands this skin, it's so garbled and just nonsense, there's no real stereotype but I did find out that this skin has the same voice actor as Freddy Fazbear...

Barik

Again Barik mains are a rarity and, nost of the time I only really see last/bottom picks grabbing Barik and doing really nothing all game but cry about their team not carrying them.

Hi-Tek/Stonecut

If a champion has access to their pre-reworks skins and in general just older skins they're often on the cheaper side and really are just bought by newbies due to this, that's really it outside of the odd end nastolgia tripper.

Team Fortress 2

So you get this skin in a way that's similar to promotional recolours, and it's more or less exclusive to steam, it's a safe bet that a TF2 Barik is new at the game and on steam, that's it.

Swashbuckler

Pirate skins often invite people into running teams of pirates skins, outside of that Swashbuckler Bariks tend to more or less the point jockey they live on the point they die on the point.

Steel/Dragon Forged Barik

This guy listens to diggy diggy hole and probably runs some stupid deck that relies on a gimmick these guys are here for fun and will probably do something cool, maybe?

Betty

Betty is new-ish and so she only has the one skin, Betty kinda is the easy version of both Willo and Dredge without the impact of either, this means Betty attracts bad players.

Dragonette

Bowsette meme aside this is Betty's only real skin and so it's kinda broad to say anything but I assume once she gets something else it'll attract... A certain audience.
So yeah 5 champs, feel free to suggest anything for future champions I'll probably see or agree with them.

A while ago I saw a post in here which highlighted an instance where Bimmy explicitly referred to the Frankenstein monster as just "Frankenstein" in one if the early AVGNs, a scandalous occurrence being that he's to this day one of the most uptight, loud and obnoxious preachers of the church of "Frankenstein's the name of the doctor, not the monster"
But would you believe our Chosen One broke his own golden rule again, multiple times in the same video and around the same time (heh) period, too?!
The video that I'm referring to is episode #3 of his classic Godzillathon: King Kong vs Godzilla
As you may or may not remember some of the original plans for that film included Godzilla fighting the Frankenstein monster and a script had already been written, but at some point Toho struck a deal with whatever company owned King Kong and they decided to make him Godzilla's adversary for the film (please forgive any factual errors, I'm a little rusty on my Godzilla trivia)
Bames tells us a variant of this piece of information and even says that the movie was originally supposed to be called "Godzilla vs Frankenstein"
...alright, nothing too strange so far, he's just stating what the original title was supposed to be....
But then he starts talking about how energy from a bunch of lightning makes King Kong stronger and brings him back to life and he adds, at the 1:48 mark: "...another indication that he was originally meant to be FRANKENSTEIN"
All this while showing a photoshopped picture of the Toho Frankenstein monster standing next to Godzilla followed by a picture of the Boris Karloff creature!
.....he just called the monster Frankenstein....again!!!! It's the name of the doctor, not the monster, Bimmy, what are you doing?!
Then he does it AGAIN!
At 3:18: "...but before production Toho decided to change FRANKENSTEIN (accompanied by the same Karloff picture) to Godzilla"
And this is after he specifically named Doctor Frankenstein, who was supposed to create a monster by "sewing together pieces of different animals", which makes it even more abhorrently blasphemous.
Only after the second strike does he start calling it "the Frankenstein monster". I guess no time to re-record the voiceover for the earlier parts, huh Bim?
Our Messiah, our voice of reason has cheated us again? Does he even care about his cause? The reason why he's on this Earth?
To remind people that the name of the monster is not Frankenstein?!
What else can I do but quote the epic words of another Internet has-been which perfectly fit the situation:
"BETRAYAAAAAAAAAAL!"

TW: mentions of suicide, self harm, brief mentions of physical, mental and child abuse along with a few other things that might trigger people.
I, (13-15 female) have a small group of friends. (All around 13-15, mainly female) But there has been some major drama in our friend group and I need advice on what to do.
I've had this friend who we'll call Sam. Sam and I have know each other since we were around 6 yrs old. We met in YeaPrimary 2. (For all the people not from the UK, that would be 1st grade)
We have known each other from then all the way until now. But this is when the drama starts.
For context, My group of friends has 4 people in it. (Including me) and one of these friends, who I'll call Rich, wanted to meet sam. But since Rich lives at least 4 hours away from us, I decided to set up an online game for us to play and for Sam and Rich to get to know each other and ask each other questions.
Sometime into the game I get a private message from Sam.
That's when Sam told me she had a crush on Rich. (We were less then 10 minutes into the game aka less then 10 minutes knowing each other) And she asked if she should tell him. I was (mostly) happy for my friend as she hasnt dated for a few years and told her to shoot her shot. And turns out, Rich liked Sam back. So they started dating.
BTW, Sam had just ghosted someone she dated online and did role-plays with, a few days before this happened. (Keep this in mind)
So some background, our entire group of friends play online role-playing games (In a private server) since we all like being able to make role-plays and storylines, except Sam. (She can be really picky)
This is how Sam and Rich basically went on dates. They also invited me to join them sometimes so they had someone else to play the "extra characters" in their role-plays. Their role-plays mostly consisted of guy x guy, mafia bosses and the typical cringe gacha storylines from 2018. I hated the 'maifa guy buys a slave' type tropes they did but I did it with them anyway because Sam always ended up getting mad and ignoring me if I said no or suggested something different.
This whole role-playing thing went on for a few months. That's when I saw Sam online with Mike. (Mike is the name of the person Sam dated online before Rich, I was friends with Mike and still was at the time despite their break up) I decided to join them and see what they were doing on a server together. (Sam had told me and Rich several times that she hated Mike and she always said he was a "alpha bad boy wannbe")
Once I joined I looked in the chat I saw a bunch of messages like Kisses softly (From Mike) and "You're sexy~" (From Sam) I was extremely confused and decided to ask Sam about this later when she wasn't on the server. She said something along the lines of "I was joking around, I never actually broke up with Mike 🤣".
So I was extremely confused and asked Rich if he knew about this.
That's where it all went to shit afterwards. (Don't worry, it gets worse)
To give a short rundown since this post is already long, Sam was cheating on Mike with Rich while also cheating on Rich with Mike as they both though that Sam dated them and had blocked the other person. When Rich 1st confronted her she said they were in a polyamous relationship. (They were not) This kept happening until eventually Mike blocked everyone (Except me) and really didn't talk to any of us. (Or so I thought.)
I always thought that Rich and Sam shouldn't be dating but I stayed out of it because Sam is the only friend I can really talk to and hang out with, without feeling anxious.
Then I found out that Sam was cheating on Rich AGAIN with a girl from her class called Jaime. Then she cheated AGAIN with a girl from my class who I'll call Autumn.
So not only did Sam cheat on Rich with 3 different people. She did it SEVERAL TIMES WITH THOSE PEOPLE.
I eventually distanced myself from the group as a whole. (I also was in hospital which helped me to ignore all of the drama as I was recovering from surgery)
That's when I found a message in the group chat. (The group chat had me, Sam, Jaime and one of Sam's friends in it as well) The message said "Imagine if Rich knew about you dating me and Autumn 🤣💀" from Jaime.
I told Rich literally everything including screenshots and evidence I had. He didn't believe me until he asked Sam which to that she laughed about it and told him that her adhd made her do bad things. Rich then went into a major depressive episode and he wouldn't respond at all to anyone.
Rich even cut himself and attempted suicide. (He has home issues and several mental illnesses, which Sam knew of) Thankfully he survived.
But here's the thing, Sam and Rich GOT BACK TOGETHER AFTER WHAT HAPPENED.
I was absolutely fucking horrified by this as it seemed to be a severely toxic and maybe even abusive relationship (Psychologically) since Rich had Bipolar and Sam used to blame him for acting weird and blamed him for her cheating.
Here's where I think I became the asshole.
I made a throwaway account and took screenshots of everything and sent them to Jaime, Autumn, Rich, our group of friends and basically everyone who knew of the drama. Which included most of the school. (And even random people from other school that knew some of the gossip)
Then it got revealed that Sam had ONLINE SEX WITH MIKE AND RICH WHILE SAM WAS DATING BOTH OF THEM AND AFTER MIKE SUPPOSEDLY BLOCKED HER!!
And then it turns out that Sam, who is bisexual, called Richs gay BFF( I'll call him Matt) a gay bastard and the F-slur. TWICE.
Ans then it turns out, after Sam had cheated on Rich the first or second time, Rich started DATING MATT AND THEY ONLY BROKE UP BECAUSE RICH FELT GUILTY.
Then Sam and Rich got into a massive fight which lead to Rich attempting suicide again. Sam said, and i quote, "womp womp🙄" when told about Richs second sucide attempt and also then Rich told her that his cat had died.
They then broke up and he blocked her on everything.
I felt horrible. I felt like I shouldn't of told everyone what Sam did and I shouldn't of put myself into their relationship..
I felt really depressed and guilty and I thought (and still do) that it was all my fault..
I honestly think I'm the asshole and I shouldn't of done anything considering I don't have any dating experience at all and I don't have any of the disorders Sam or Rich has...
But I've always been told to get a second opinion on everything so I wanted to ask Reddit. (Not the most logical way to do it but I'm desperate af)
So Reddit, AITAH?
I'm sorry if the spelling or wording is off, I'm writing this at 3:13 am and I have school at 8:30. But I am desperate to hear someone else's opinion on this as I feel i am going insane. I'll try and answer any questions as best as I can.
(Ps. Sam has dyslexia and supposedly has adhd as well which she uses as an excuse for why she cheated and blamed Rich. She also used the excuse that her home life is terrible. Which it is. Rich has autism, adhd, bipolar, lack of awareness and is physically and metally abused by his parents. And before I forget, my mother was walking home from work one night and saw Sam HITTING her MOTHER with a stick and laughing about it)
I will honestly appreciate ANY help or opinion given on my situation..

What's up guys and girls. I just got out of a 2 year relationship. Ex gf emotionally cheated on me, so I left. I felt crushed and alone because she was my everything, my lover, partner, best friend, supporter, everything. But now I am all I have. But now after 5 weeks I am feeling better. I have used the negativity and lonelieness and sadness and pain as energy to drive myself forward. And you don't need a breakup to learn this way! Here's my tips on how to become happier during your alone periods:

1. Journaling. Journaling helped me a lot to think thorough of my weaknesses, flaws, and strengths. It helps you observe yourself to better understand yourself. It's best to do this with a clear head so you're not biased against yourself. At first it may seem pointless since you're just writing it, but that's the point. Thats the start to self realization by knowing what and who and why you are the way you are.
2. Forgive yourself. Whether you messed up by trusting the wrong person, not being good enough, having any anger issues, not trying hard enough. Forgive yourself, do not burden yourself with yourself. Forgive yourself and ask yourself what you can do to change whatever it is you're giving yourself a hard time with. Forgiving yourself and learning to love yourself is a big step to living a peaceful life because you may underestimate what you can do in a year, 2 years, 3 years, 10 and even 20 years. Your life goes on and even though you may not like this chapter you're in right now you can always make changes to create better ones.
3. Go out for a walk under the sun! Does not matter if it's too hot or too cold. Exercise stimulates your brain and body to relaxation, and after walking for so many miles I'm sure it won't seem much of a chore after. Plus, you can also lose weight if that's a goal of yours. If walking under the sun, or even jogging, is something you would never do then give it multiple tries. It helps you push out of your "comfort zone" which is probably just sleeping around (I know my comfort was sleeping my days away depressingly). You can also listen to self help videos or podcasts while you walk. You may learn some new methods of quotes that you can implement into your life!
4. Avoid the junk food! Also known as comfort food! Too many carbs makes you feel lazy, which in turn mixes with your negative emotions. Making you even more glued to your bed. Or sofa. Instead, eat an apple or banana or another fruit. Or simply drink water! Your body will thank you for it in the long run. 😌
5. Pick up a healthy hobby. If you like to drink or smoke, cut back on it as much as you can. Make goals to quit those vices. Instead, learn to play the guitar, learn a skill like plumbing or wiring or carpentry, learn another language. You can also volunteer at animal shelters and walk dogs! They'll love you in return. Or you can feed the street pigeons. Helping out little critters like cats, dogs, pigeons or others can make you feel better about yourself. You'd be surprised how much they'd want to be around you or even snuggle up to you. Or even just ask your boss for longer hours! You just have to keep yourself busy from having too much time to think about anything negative.
6. Avoid social media: Social media only shows people's highlights and pushes the "you're either with me or against me" kind of mentality when you're watching reels of the top people, which leads to a certain identity loss for people who've yet to discover themselves. Plus it can get very toxic in the comment section.

Well those are the major things that have helped me to see brighter days while living alone. I hope you all find peace within yourselves because it is mostly found there (I say mostly because maybe some of you live in high crime areas or live with abusive family members). Remember to love yourself because at the end of the day you're all you have, so be kind to yourself and be your own best friend. If you need anyone to talk to feel free to hit me up and I'll get to you when I can. I know what it's like to struggle alone, to have nobody by your side. That's why I'm here to help. Best of luck to yall 🙏💪

I just finished {Peaches & Honey: These Immortal Truths by R Raeta} and had to come straight here to rave about it!

Synopsis

Anna is a young, poor woman in England 1184, outcasted for her vitiligo. Struggling to survive on her own, she one day saves a girl in dire circumstances. This girl - actually a god in disguise - thanks her with the gift of a divine peach. Anna eats the entire thing, intrigued by its hollow center and lack of a seed. The peach grants Anna a gift: her wounds heal faster than they can kill her. But this gift comes with the challenges of outliving everyone she has ever known or will ever know. As the centuries pass, the only constant in her life is that her creator - Khiran - always returns to see her.

Review

The often-made comparison between this and The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue are very apt. That book is pretty polarizing, but I actually liked it quite a bit. However, I liked this one even better. This is the first book in a duology.
This book was excellent for a lot of different reasons:

• Beautiful, lyrical prose
• Anna is a deserving and kindhearted FMC, with not an ounce of sass or irony
• Khiran is an intriguing MMC, a powerful and somewhat depressed man who wishes to live in a world of Anna's creation
• Khiran's chemistry with Anna leaps off the page
• Lovely historical settings, cultures, time periods, and people give each chapter a fresh feel
• More character driven than plot driven, but with characters this great, that's a good thing
• Deeply romantic pining over centuries
• Third person POV

My only complaints about this book are quite minor:

• At some point, it does seem a little silly that Anna just so happens to experience many major world events that a freshman in high school would learn in history class. I mean, yeah she just so happens to be in London during Jack the Ripper and in the US during the Civil War and underground railroad and in Italy during the initial spread of the black plague and in Spain during the first circumnavigation of the world and expansion into the New World and in Boston during the Boston Tea Partyand she's in Germany leading up to WWII At some point those coincidences do seem improbable and very western-centric (only one chapter focuses on the east; a chapter on China and piracy).
• In addition, there are a 4-5 times in the story that anachronisms pop up that really stood out to me; calling the War of the Rebellion / War for Southern Independence the "American Civil War" in the 1860s just doesn't make sense. Referring to German LGBTQ+ people as "gay" in the 1930s when that term just didn't exist in that context then...

These complaints are very minor, however, because the prose is so beautiful and the characters are so wonderful to read about and experience all these different events through their eyes. The occassional incorrect, anachronistic word used every hundred pages or so is truly not a stumbling block to enjoying this book.
I couldn't put this book down and I am very eager for book 2 to come out in early June!

This book is for you if you like:

• Flowery, purple prose
• Slow burn romances
• Subtle, slow-moving fantasy elements
• Historical time periods
• Character-driven stories
• Mature, complex, deeply human characters
• The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue and/or wanted a kinder, more loving version of that book
• Books that are free on KU (and currently on sale if you wanna buy it)
• Stories where even minor characters feel like real humans
• Stories where the FMC is loved because of her genuine kindness rather than for her beauty or some inexplicable quality that draws others to her
• Books featuring insecurity due to feeling like an outsider
• A really cool take on magic / gods / powers that feels almost mythical

Quotes

That night, when she curls up under the blanket and lets the tears drip silently from her cheeks, she wonders how it’s possible to grieve the loss of something she never expected to have.

.

“What we want isn’t always what we need,” Eira says, setting the jar on the table before reaching out and setting her ancient hands on Anna’s shoulders. “Immortality is a fickle beast, dear girl. Stay too long in one place and you’ll rot there.” “But I’m happy—” “No,” she interrupts, “You’re not unhappy. It’s not the same.”

.

Truths are for those who can afford to live it, not for those struggling to find any bright spot of light in a world that casts them into darkness.

.

“It’s easy to be righteous, to be angry, when you weren’t there to see all the blood and misery that came before you,” he says. “Most of these soldiers will only ever see one war firsthand in their lifetime. The ones who survive will grow old and sit in front of their hearths and pass stories of this battle to their children and grandchildren. They’ll romanticize it. Sing praises of how bravely their battalion fought. They won’t speak of the squelch of their fellow friend and soldier’s blood in their boots, or the fear that painted every soldier’s face. Enemy and ally alike.”

I just finished {Peaches & Honey: These Immortal Truths by R Raeta} and had to come straight here to rave about it!

Synopsis

Anna is a young, poor woman in England 1184, outcasted for her vitiligo. Struggling to survive on her own, she one day saves a girl in dire circumstances. This girl - actually a god in disguise - thanks her with the gift of a divine peach. Anna eats the entire thing, intrigued by its hollow center and lack of a seed. The peach grants Anna a gift: her wounds heal faster than they can kill her. But this gift comes with the challenges of outliving everyone she has ever known or will ever know. As the centuries pass, the only constant in her life is that her creator - Khiran - always returns to see her.

Review

The often-made comparison between this and The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue are very apt. That book is pretty polarizing, but I actually liked it quite a bit. However, I liked this one even better. This is the first book in a duology.
This book was excellent for a lot of different reasons:

• Beautiful, lyrical prose
• Anna is a deserving and kindhearted FMC, with not an ounce of sass or irony
• Khiran is an intriguing MMC, a powerful and somewhat depressed man who wishes to live in a world of Anna's creation
• Khiran's chemistry with Anna leaps off the page
• Lovely historical settings, cultures, time periods, and people give each chapter a fresh feel
• More character driven than plot driven, but with characters this great, that's a good thing
• Deeply romantic pining over centuries
• Third person POV

My only complaints about this book are quite minor:

• At some point, it does seem a little silly that Anna just so happens to experience many major world events that a freshman in high school would learn in history class. I mean, yeah she just so happens to be in London during Jack the Ripper and in the US during the Civil War and underground railroad and in Italy during the initial spread of the black plague and in Spain during the first circumnavigation of the world and expansion into the New World and in Boston during the Boston Tea Partyand she's in Germany leading up to WWII At some point those coincidences do seem improbable and very western-centric (only one chapter focuses on the east; a chapter on China and piracy).
• In addition, there are a 4-5 times in the story that anachronisms pop up that really stood out to me; calling the War of the Rebellion / War for Southern Independence the "American Civil War" in the 1860s just doesn't make sense. Referring to German LGBTQ+ people as "gay" in the 1930s when that term just didn't exist in that context then...

These complaints are very minor, however, because the prose is so beautiful and the characters are so wonderful to read about and experience all these different events through their eyes. The occassional incorrect, anachronistic word used every hundred pages or so is truly not a stumbling block to enjoying this book.
I couldn't put this book down and I am very eager for book 2 to come out in early June!

This book is for you if you like:

• Flowery, purple prose
• Slow burn romances
• Subtle, slow-moving fantasy elements
• Historical time periods
• Character-driven stories
• Mature, complex, deeply human characters
• The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue and/or wanted a kinder, more loving version of that book
• Books that are free on KU (and currently on sale if you wanna buy it)
• Stories where even minor characters feel like real humans
• Stories where the FMC is loved because of her genuine kindness rather than for her beauty or some inexplicable quality that draws others to her
• Books featuring insecurity due to feeling like an outsider
• A really cool take on magic / gods / powers that feels almost mythical

Quotes

That night, when she curls up under the blanket and lets the tears drip silently from her cheeks, she wonders how it’s possible to grieve the loss of something she never expected to have.

.

“What we want isn’t always what we need,” Eira says, setting the jar on the table before reaching out and setting her ancient hands on Anna’s shoulders. “Immortality is a fickle beast, dear girl. Stay too long in one place and you’ll rot there.” “But I’m happy—” “No,” she interrupts, “You’re not unhappy. It’s not the same.”

.

Truths are for those who can afford to live it, not for those struggling to find any bright spot of light in a world that casts them into darkness.

.

“It’s easy to be righteous, to be angry, when you weren’t there to see all the blood and misery that came before you,” he says. “Most of these soldiers will only ever see one war firsthand in their lifetime. The ones who survive will grow old and sit in front of their hearths and pass stories of this battle to their children and grandchildren. They’ll romanticize it. Sing praises of how bravely their battalion fought. They won’t speak of the squelch of their fellow friend and soldier’s blood in their boots, or the fear that painted every soldier’s face. Enemy and ally alike.”

Hit the higlights first: M 24 UK Single Overweight Short Virgin Live at home cos I cant afford to move out and have no means of transportation. NSFW just in case.
Been going to therapy since Jan. I thought things were getting better about 5/6 weeks ago but sinve then I've just slidden further and further downwards and feel like I've sunk to my lowest point yet.
I have a pretty ok job at a pretty rapidly growing homecare company in Clinical IT. But recently I have a growing feeling that I just can't keep up any more. The feeling of being tired and empty and anxious now seems to be affecting me more physically than ever. Worst part is, I don't feel like I can talk to anyone about it (apart from my 2 weekly therapy appointments). Issue is, I don't know what to do anymore other than keep going. If I quit the guilt of letting people down would be too much. Plus I need the money.
The thoughts of 'I dont know what to do' are now permenent. I keep focusing on those words. Always with different meanings. Im broken, I have tried and failed so many times, I don't know what to do. People expect so much of me and no matter what I do, people will be disapppointed or upset with me. I don't know what to do. People have much worse problems than me, if I day I'm not ok then I sound selfish. I don't know what to do. All the things I want to do or need to do. I dont know how to do them, I dont know if I can do them. I don't know what to do. I'm so fucking lonely, I'm fucking pathetic and too nice for my own good. I don't know what to do.
6 years of different anti depressents. 5 months of therapy. No friends. No relationships. A family that doesnt care about anything other than themselves and makes you feel guilty for speaking about yourself.
Theres a great quote from south park that about sums things up for me
"When all the things that made you laugh just make you sick, how do you go on when nothing makes you happy?".
I cant even drive for christ sake, tried and failed so many times so theres literally no escape. I'm trapped and I don't know what to do anymore.