I play a lot of manager sims, though I probably play the most of this and Out of the Park baseball. In that game, I can start any season in Major League history from 1876 (or maybe earlier) to the present day, with accurate rosters, fields (via mods), and true-to-period gameplay.
Obviously, that is not something that Frontier can do on a limited budget with all the work they've put into graphical realization of the circuits, and there'd be huge licensing issues. But what I wish they would do is retain 2022, 2023, and 24 content in-game so that we can select an earlier start point. Obviously have the default be the current year, but allow us the option to go back...sorta like F1 Challenge 99-02 from a manager perspective.
I don't think this would take a ton of work. Perhaps licensing former drivers like Mick Schumacher who're no longer on the grid, but I'd imagine most of them would want to be included. If not, make a Nick Shoemaker for past seasons.
My biggest issue with the long-term sim realism of this game is it's static nature. Real F1 has annual changes in the schedule etc. At least if I could start in 2022, we'd see the introduction of Vegas in 23, return of China in 24 etc.
Anyone have thoughts on this? Would love to get Frontier to think about this for 25.

So I was doing what all cool guys do on a Wednesday night: scrolling through the minor league rosters and stats to see how the first month and a half went. I knew how stacked Single-A Modesto is this year and wanted to check out their pitching, because despite not having many standout names, their pitching has been surprisingly dominant. That's when I learned about my new favorite prospect:
Will Schomberg
Here's the boring basic stuff:
Schomberg is a pitcher; a righty who has been a rock in Modesto's starting rotation this season. He's a bit undersized for a starter at 5'10", and based solely on the occasional highlight videos on MiLB.com, he's a fastball-slider guy. He doesn't appear on any top prospect lists, but he's off to a better start than just about any other starter in the farm system.
Now for the cool stuff:
Schomberg was an undrafted free agent last season. It's pretty common to talk about undrafted guys in the NFL as relevant pieces, but pretty rare in baseball with its 20-round amateur draft. Schomberg was a serviceable reliever at Davidson until his senior year, where he broke out as a starter. He became the team's ace with 13 starts, a 3.97 ERA (4th in the conference), and put up the second-highest career K/9 in Davidson's history at 10.15. He earned a spot on the Atlantic 10 First team.
Despite that, he fell through all 20 rounds in 2023's amateur draft and signed with the Mariners as an undrafted free agent. He appeared in 3 unremarkable games at rookie ball in 2023, but was put in a rotation spot at Modesto the start this season.
Schomberg has taken that opportunity and has made the most of it so far. In 34 innings over 7 starts, he's put up a 2.12 ERA, 1.00 WHIP, 3.19 FIP, 41 strikeouts to 15 walks, and an opponent's BA of just .161. Earlier this month, he won our Minor League Pitcher of the Week honors, after throwing a 6 inning, 0 runs, 1 BB, 10 strikeout game.
He's probably on his way to winning the pitcher of the month, too. His stat line in May looks like this: 3 GS, 16 IP, 0 ER, 5 H, 2 BB, 21 SO.
He is absolutely shoving at Single-A. At 23 years old, it won't be long before he's promoted to Everett. Even though he's a bit older than his competition, it's super impressive for an undrafted guy to be dominating like this. He'll probably never be on those top prospect lists because of his age, but I don't care. Schomberg has been one of the coolest stories to come out of the first part of this season.

First lets take a quick look at some of the trades the Blue Jays have done mid-season in 2024:

• IF Tanner Morris (26) to MIN for $$$
  • Some sad news off the get go...after hitting just .149/.281/.213 with a .494 OPS in AAA, Morris has retired from baseball mid-season. Placed on the voluntary retirement list until his current contract expires at the end of the season.
• LHP Jimmy Robbins (26) to TEX for $$$
  • Has taken the role of emergency depth for the Rangers AAA team and has pitched just 7.1 innings and is rocking a 8.59 ERA, .321 OBA & 2.18 WHIP.
• RHP Wes Parsons (31) to CLE for $$$
  • Filling in his usual role as he uses up his last year of options. Has pitched 4.0 innings in MLB allowing 0 ER and 14.2 innings in AAA having a solid 1.84 ERA. Solid depth pitcher for them but not a mainstay.
• RHP Mitch White (29) to SFG for $$$
  • After allowing 6 ER in 10.0 IP with TOR he was DFA/Traded to SFG where he allowed 7 ER in 5.1 IP before again being DFA/Traded to MIL where has has allowed 2 ER in 3.2 IP. Seems like teams think they can fix him considering they are trading for him. MIL has also been hampered with injuries and internal demotions to their bullpen so his stay might not be long when arms return.

Now lets take a look at some of the players that left the organization in the off-season through trade/waivers that were at one point on the 40-Man roster:

• IF Santiago Espinal (29) to CIN for RHP Chris McElvain (23)
  • Not a great season for Espinal as he has declined even further from his past seasons in all aspects of the game. He is hitting just .200/.252/.284 with an .536 OPS. His defensive metrics suggests he is now a negative player on defence as well. Due to injury he has been given a solid amount of playing time too. McElvain has been solid in A+ but still looks likely to be a future reliever.
• UTL Otto Lopez (25) to SFG for $$$
  • DFA due to the middle-infleid depth the Jays had was then DFA by the SFG even when they were awarded another option year with him. MIA got him for free on waivers as the only claiming team and he has been very solid for them. He earned a quick call-up after having a 1.526 OPS in a week and is carving himself a role in the Majors with some solid hitting and strong defence. He is batting .282/.333/.564 with an .897 OPS in 39 PA. His early power display is very unsustainable though. He is already half way to his career minor league high.
• RHP Yosver Zulueta (26) to CIN via DFA Waivers
  • There was a lot of anger amongst the fanbase with his loss on waivers and while his stuff is still good the production is still no where near where it should be. In 14.1 IP in AAA he has a 5.65 ERA, .267 OBA & 2.02 while striking out 18 and walking 13. Still not sure how he remained on prospect lists as long as he has. He just hasn't been good for awhile now. He does give the vibes off the guy that will randomly break out at age 30/31.
• C Tyler Heineman (32) to NYM to BOS via DFA Waivers
  • Remains the trusty #3 catcher we knew him as. He is just 0-for-1 with 1 HBP at the Major League level but is staying warm in the Red Sox minor league system until he is needed once again. Batting .257./395/.286 with a .681 OPS in AAA. Severn is an upgrade in all departments though except the lack of magic tricks.

Finally, lets take a look into the players that left the organization in free-agency:

• 3B Matt Chapman (31) to SFG (3 Y x $18 M w/ Two Player Opt-Outs)
  • Easily the most talked about departure this season and it feels like beating a dead horse at this point but Chapman has been super terrible. Hitting just .206/.258/.341/.599 with a 73 wRC+ (1.0 bWAR / 0.1 fWAR). His strikeout rate remains as high as ever but his BB% has been nearly cut in half. He has already made 6 errors and his defence has dipped further for the 4th straight season. Chapman has just 2 extra-base hits over his last 82 PA despite having some of the best swing-rates and exit velocities in baseball. Looks like Chapman will be a SFG for the full 3 seasons.
• RHP Jordan Hicks (27) to SF (4 Y x $11.0 M)
  • Arguably the only "big" contract the Giants have signed that have given them their value for their money. Converting back to a starter has worked wonders for him as he has posted a 2.44 ERA / 3.21 FIP, .220 OBA & 1.15 WHIP. He has taken a good 3 mph off his fastball which has led to a decrease in strikeouts, whiffs and more harder contact against but it has led to an increase and sustained improvement in control. 5.0 IP does seem to be his limit most nights and there are some long-term questions about stamina and durability but so far he has been worth ever penny. If things do now wrong e can always be converted back to an RP and his contract still won't look bad.
• 2B/OF Whit Merrifield (35) to PHI (1 Y x $7 M w/ Club Option for $8.0 M)
  • Age seems to have properly caught up to Whit who is just hitting .188/.261/.300 with a .561 OPS in 80 AB with is just a 62 wRC+ (0.1 bWAR / -0.1 fWAR). His savant page portrays him as one of the worst hitters in baseball and his defence is now of negative value. Phillies had him hitting lead-off for 3 straight games recently where he went 1-for-15 before being demoted again.
• RHP Adam Cimber (33) to LAA (1 Y x $1.65 M)
  • After struggling with injuries and inconsistency at the end of his Jays tenor he has rebounded back with LAA to being a solid mid-usage arm. Posting a respectable 4.00 ERA, .214 OBA & 1.00 WHIP. His numbers are misleading though as outside of 2 meltdowns he has been shutdown. He is one of the heaviest used bullpen arms in baseball and has only allowed an ER in 3-of-19 appearances. Should fetch the Angels a decent prospect at the trade deadline.
• RHP Jay Jackson (36) to MIN (1 Y x $1.3 M w/ Club Option for $3.0 M)
  • Jackson has not had a great season with MIN as he is rocking a 6.20 ERA, .244 OBA & 1.28 WHIP.He has allowed at least 1 ER in more than half his appearances. It seems like MIN will likely not pick-up their club option on his contract at this rate. It is unfortunate to see after how important he was for us last season. Glad he got his money though.
• SP Hyun Jin Ryu (37) to Hanwha Eagles (KBO) (8 Y x $1.6 M)
  • Ryu signed the largest contract in KBO League history this offseason which keeps him in the organization until his mid-40's. In 49.0 IP he has 5.33 ERA, 1.45 WHIP & 47 SO vs. 14 BB. Haven't watched him nor seen his game-to-game production but the face value numbers don't look great. To be fair he was likely never playing most of the contract anyways.

Just to reassure everyone of someone productive not slipping through the cracks here are all the minor-league departures:
Free Agency:

• C Rob Brantly (34) to TBR (AAA) is hitting .310/.375/.466 with a .841 OPS
• LHP Paul Fry (31) to SDP (AAA) is pitching a 6.43 ERA, .317 OBA & 1.76 WHIP
• SS Mason McCoy (29) to SDP (AAA) is hitting .259/.342/.363 with a .705 OPS
• C Lyle Lin (26) to ARI (AA) has just 3 GP due to being on the Developmental List

Releases:

• RHP Jiorgeny Casimiri (22) to BAL (A) is pitching 12.91 ERA, .436 OBA & 3.26 WHIP

Rule 5 Draft (Minor League Portion):

• 3B Angel Del Rosario (21) to MIN (A) is hitting .271/.364/.292 with a .656 OPS
• SS Trevor Schwecke (26) to PHI (AA) is hitting .182/.282/.227 with a .509 OPS

Just for completion here is a list of players who left from the organization that are not active in professional baseball right now (as far as I know):
Free Agents Un-signed (13):

• 1B/DH Brandon Belt, RHP Anthony Bass, SP Gabe Klobosits, C Jamie Ritchie, SS Abiezel Ramirez, RP Rowan Wick, RP Matt Peacock, SP Zach Thompson, RP Roither Hernandez, RP Jol Concepcion, RP Joe Jones, RP Deigo Linares & C Stevie Berman

Minor League Releases:

• Off-Season (20): RHP Darwin Cruz, RHP Michael Brewer, C Victor Mesia, RHP Christopher Rodriguez, 3B Endri Garcia, RHP Julio Ramirez, RHP Ben Baggett, RHP Winder Garcia, RHP Tony Rosario, RHP Cesar Ayala, OF MacKenzie Mueller, SS Luis Garcia, RHP Francisco Lucumi, CF Jaun Pizarro, RHP Jackson Rees, SS Martin Gimenez, RHP Davis Feldman, LHP Cooper Benson, RHP Sam Ryan & SS Rikelbin De Castro
• Spring Training (3): IF Eduardo Escobar, RHP Alan Zhang Carter & RHP Nolan Long
• Mid-Season (4): RHP Leam Mendez, RHP Gabriel Ponce, RHP Jerry Huntzinger & RHP Fitz Stadler

Baseball is a beloved sport in many countries, known for its rich history, strategic depth, and thrilling moments. This guide will walk you through the basics of how a baseball game is played, from the structure of the game to the key rules and strategies that make it so captivating.

A baseball field is unique and consists of several key areas:

• Infield: This area contains the four bases (first, second, third, and home plate) arranged in a diamond shape.
• Outfield: The grassy area beyond the infield, bordered by the outfield fence.
• Pitcher's Mound: Located at the center of the diamond, where the pitcher stands to throw the ball.

Teams and Players
Each baseball game is contested between two teams, each consisting of nine players. The positions are:

1. Pitcher
2. Catcher
3. First Baseman
4. Second Baseman
5. Third Baseman
6. Shortstop
7. Left Fielder
8. Center Fielder
9. Right Fielder

Innings
A standard baseball game is divided into nine innings. Each inning is split into two halves: the top (where the visiting team bats) and the bottom (where the home team bats). Each team gets three outs per half-inning.
The Basics of Play
The game begins with the pitcher throwing the ball towards the batter, who stands at home plate with the goal of hitting the ball into play. The interaction between the pitcher and batter is the core of baseball's strategic play.
Pitching
The pitcher uses various types of pitches (fastball, curveball, slider, etc.) to try to get the batter out. The main ways a batter can be out are:

• Strikeout: The batter misses three pitches, or fails to swing at three strikes.
• Groundout/Flyout: The batter hits the ball, but it is caught by a fielder before the batter can reach a base. if you want to know about fantasy baseball team names for kids you can check this.

Batting
The batter's goal is to hit the ball and reach base. Hits are classified as:

• Single: The batter reaches first base.
• Double: The batter reaches second base.
• Triple: The batter reaches third base.
• Home Run: The batter hits the ball out of the playing field in fair territory, allowing them to circle all bases and score a run.

Base Running
After hitting the ball, the batter becomes a runner and must advance counterclockwise around the bases. The goal is to reach home plate to score a run. Runners can advance on hits, walks, or when the opposing team commits errors.
The defensive team works to prevent the batter from reaching base and scoring runs. This involves a combination of pitching, fielding, and teamwork.
Infielders are responsible for fielding ground balls, catching line drives, and turning double plays. Communication and quick reflexes are crucial.
Outfielders must cover large areas of the field to catch fly balls, prevent extra-base hits, and throw the ball back to the infield efficiently.
Key Defensive Plays

• Double Play: Two outs are made in one continuous play, typically involving a ground ball hit to an infielder.
• Relay Throw: A throw from the outfield to an infielder, who then throws to another base to get a runner out.

Scoring and Winning
A run is scored when a player successfully advances around all four bases and reaches home plate. The team with the most runs at the end of nine innings wins the game. If the score is tied, extra innings are played until a winner is determined.

• Home Runs
• Sacrifice Fly: A fly ball hit deep enough to allow a runner to score after tagging up at third base.
• Stolen Bases: A runner advances to the next base while the pitcher is delivering the ball to home plate.

Common Terms and Rules

• Ball: A pitch that is outside the strike zone and not swung at by the batter.
• Strike: A pitch that is in the strike zone or swung at and missed by the batter.
• Foul Ball: A ball hit outside the field of play; it counts as a strike unless the batter already has two strikes.

Key Rules

• Three Strikes and You’re Out: A batter is out after three strikes.
• Four Balls Equals a Walk: A batter advances to first base after four balls.
• Tagging Up: On a caught fly ball, runners must tag their current base before advancing.

Term	Definition
Strike Zone	The area over home plate from the batter’s knees to the midpoint of their torso.
Double Play	A play where two offensive players are put out in one continuous action.
Balk	An illegal motion by the pitcher that may result in runners advancing bases.
Error	A mistake by a fielder that allows a batter or runner to advance.

Strategies and Tactics

• Bunting: Lightly tapping the ball to advance a runner.
• Hit and Run: The runner starts running before the ball is hit to disrupt the defense.
• Stealing Bases: Timing the pitcher’s delivery to advance a base undetected.

Defensive Tactics

• Shifting: Adjusting the positions of fielders based on the batter's tendencies.
• Pitching Inside: Throwing close to the batter to make hitting more difficult.

Conclusion
Understanding the fundamental elements of baseball is essential for appreciating the complexity and beauty of the game. From the detailed strategies employed by both teams to the simple joy of hitting a home run, baseball offers something for everyone. Whether you're a seasoned fan or a newcomer, there's always something new to learn and enjoy in this timeless sport.

I recently had an epiphany regarding my compulsive/impulsive spending. Over the course of the last 5 - 6 years, I've gone through several catastrophic interests:
-crypto, 10's of thousands lost -ipo's, stocks, meme stocks, thousands lost -sports betting apps, hundreds -baseball cards, thousands and thousands
I finally recognized this pattern of behavior several months ago as a pattern of gambling addiction or some sort of addictive behavior.
It's nearly cost me my marriage on two occasions, and as of today- I am looking at losing my marriage again due to a relapse on trading cards.
The amount of shame I feel is unreal. Guilt, confusion. I don't understand how I justified all of these decisions into trading away my family.
I don't know where to turn for help. It seems gambling programs advertise mainly to those with gaming problems, which to be fair I have had - but not the biggest issue.
The issue with sports cards as gambling is very sparsely discussed, barring 1-2 articles online. We seem to be in an age of rampant gambling. Or maybe I am just susceptible based on my personality and history.
How do I get better and become a trustworthy person again? I can't believe I've done this to my family and children.
Feeling lost and hopeless. I'm in SW Ohio if that helps for resources.
Thanks for reading

Bovada Sportsbook Review 2024

Bovada History
Bovada has firmly established itself as the most popular offshore online sportsbook for players in the U.S. Bovada covers a typical range of sports. It has a top-rated reputation for paying customers out on time, and we have always found the customer service at Bovada to be responsive and has multiple ways of staying in contact with a customer.
Bovada was initially part of the Bodog, the brand launched by entrepreneur Calvin Ayre in 2000. Bovada is the U.S. sports betting app, If you are looking for a sports betting sites in Canada Bodog is available today.
Customer Service
The customer service team works 24/7, 365 days a year. Bovada’s customer service team tends to be active across the web’s sports betting and gambling forums. There is chat, email and of course phone options for getting in touch with Bovada. If you are on X then there is a Bovada handle to follow.
Is Bovada safe? The site uses SSL encryption software to keep the connection secure. Bovada has been in business for over 20 years. If it was one of those rip off sites, then it would have gone out of business a long time ago. The team at Bovada has made it a premier offshore site and a large part of the credit goes to the responsive nature of the customer service department.
Website Experience
The Bovada site has all of the sports betting wagers than a US customer would expect. Ease of navigation, betting menu and overall aesthetics. It is easy to browse and the various sports and markets are laid out in an obvious manner. The site is devoid of unnecessary clutter.
The menu at the top of the homepage allows you to choose from the most popular sports, including football, basketball, soccer, and hockey. There are also icons that take you straight through to the live betting section and to a list of all the sports covered. A Quick Links section to the left of the sports betting homepage also alerts you to big sporting events that are about to take place, while you will see the most important upcoming ball games listed in the middle of the page. You can switch from American odds to fractional or decimal odds.
Sports Betting Experience
Bovada offers a wide range of betting options for anyone that likes to bet on sports. All of the major sports are covered, football, basketball, baseball, hockey, soccer, tennis, golf, boxing, and UFC. They also offer smaller markets like, table tennis, badminton, winter sports, and Aussie rules. European sports like darts, snooker, cricket, rugby league, and rugby union will see them covered at Bovada.
As a US focused site, the United States customer will see their favorite sports offered with a large number of bets available. NFL, NBA, MLB and NHL fans will find betting options to choose from on each game. You will often find more than 100 different bet types on offer when you click on an NFL game. The odds include, spread, totals, and win as would be expected. However, Bovada provides fans with alternative spreads and props as well. Yes, Bovada offers same game parlays just like Fanduel and Draftkings do. If you are currently wagering at one of these books then it is worth taking a look at Bovada to see if your bet has a better return at Bovada. Why make an SGP bet for +800 when Bovada is offering +950?
What about European sports? Bovada offers more than 100 betting odds on a big Premier League or La Liga game. Popular betting options such as draw no bet, correct score, and half-time/full-time betting to corners, goal props, and more.
There is also a politics betting section at Bovada. If you want to bet on politics in the US, you must use an offshore site. Political wagers are banned at Draftkings, Fanduel, BetMGM, Caesars and all US located betting sites. It is against Federal law for any betting site located in the United States to offer bets on politics.
Betting Menu Odds
Bovada generally offers everything you would expect from Draftkings or Fanduel. In fact, when Draftkings & Fanduel first started out, they were just clones of Bovada.
Mobile Betting App Review
The Bovada betting app is a browser extension. Bovada offers a mobile betting interface with all of the qualities of an app but with one big difference. An app from the Google or Apple app store would also include a lot of spywares. Your every movement would be tracked. This is how BetMGM and Caesars apps operate. They have access to all of your phone calls and text messages on your app. Bovada doesn't operate like this. There is fare more personal privacy with using a browser extension than using an Apple spyware app.
Casino, Poker, and Other Gaming Options
The Bovada site includes sports, online casino, live dealer, poker, and horses. The online casino at Bovada is one of the largest casinos in the world and will satisfy 95% of online casino customers. Casino games including blackjack, table games, slots, and specialty games. The casino section displays a collection of featured games when you arrive, made up of classic slots, popular table games, and Bovada is constantly adding new games to satisfy the US gaming market. The video poker has 17 different game options such as; Deuces Wild, Joker Poker 52 Hands, and Double Double Bonus Poker. There is also a large variety of live dealer games.
Reputation
Is Bovada legit? The site has been around since 2000. It is not one of those betting sites that comes and goes in a couple of years. Bovada has been around for over 20 years because of customer loyalty. The customers know that the Bovada motto, "never missed a payout" is vital to staying in business. Bovada has also stayed in business this long by evolving to meet the changing desires of the US betting market. When customers want a new type of bet or a new casino game. Bovada responds.
Bovada Pros

• Generous welcome bonuses for crypto
• Excellent referral bonus
• Bonuses are credited instantly
• Easy to claim and use the bonuses
• Large betting menu
• Rewards points can be exchanged for cash bonuses
• Support for multiple languages, including English, Spanish and Portuguese

Bovada Cons

• The non crypto bonus for sports maxes out at $250
• While Bovada operates in 46 states, it does not take bets in DE, MD, NJ, NV.

Bonus Codes
Bovada Casino Bonus Codes & Free Spins

• CAWELCOME — First-time players can get a 100% match deposit bonus (up to $1,000)
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• BVCBITCOIN150 — Bitcoin users will receive a 150% first-time deposit bonus (up to $1,500)
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• BIGLEAGUES - No deposit bonus code, you get 25 free spins on the slot game 777 Deluxe

Sports Bonus

• BVD1000 Sports Betting Bonus of 50% on 1st deposit up to $1,000
• BTCSWB750 – Sports betting bonus code for deposit with Crypto. Get 75% match bonus up to $750, valid with a Bitcoin, Litecoin, Bitcoin Cash or Bitcoin SV Deposit. Rollover is 5X Sports

Poker Bonus

• PWB500 — poker players get a 100% match deposit bonus up to $500 on their first deposit

Using Crypto
Bovada offers better bonuses and quicker withdrawal times if you use crypto. If you are new to crypto and need a guide to getting started. Bovada offers an online video series on how to setup a crypto wallet. Purchase crypto and how to deposit & withdraw from Bovada.
See videos on how to setup a crypto wallet and make your deposit.
Video – How to Get Started Using Crypto
New To Crypto?
Registration Screen
This will be your first step to opening an account with Bovada
You will need to provide the following:

1. Your First and Last Name
2. Your Date of Birth
3. A mobile number for verification
4. An email address for promotions and verification
5. Preferred currency. You do NOT need to make all withdrawals & deposits with the choice.
6. Your Zip Code. Bovada does not accept bets in: Nevada, New Jersey, New York, Maryland, or Delaware.
7. Click on verification text or email. Bovada Registration Screen. This will be your first step to opening an account with Bovada. You will need to provide the following. Your First and Last Name Your Date of Birth A mobile number for verification An email address for promotions and verification Preferred currency. You do NOT need to make all withdrawals & deposits with the choice. Your Zip Code. Bovada does not accept bets in : Nevada, New Jersey, New York, Maryland, or Delaware. Click on verification text or email.

Making a Deposit

1. Login into your Bovada account
2. In the upper right will be an account icon
3. Your account deposit / withdraw screens & available bonuses are here
4. Choose deposit
5. Choose deposit type
6. Choose deposit amount
7. Choose your bonus (if you want to search your bonuses, click here before choosing type & amount)
8. After making a deposit a verification screen with reference number will show
9. Once a deposit is confirmed, you are ready to start gambling. Making a Deposit at Bovada Login into your Bovada account In the upper right will be an account icon Your account deposit / withdraw screens & available bonuses are here Choose deposit Choose deposit type Choose deposit amount Choose your bonus (if you want to search your bonuses, click here before choosing type & amount) After making a deposit a verification screen with reference number will show Once a deposit is confirmed, you are ready to start gambling

Choose Your Bonus
Scroll down to choose your bonus before deciding what amount you will deposit. There may be additional bonus offers available that are better than the one you were going to use.Choose Your BonusScroll down to choose your bonus before deciding what amount you will deposit. There may be additional bonus offers available that are better than the one you were going to use.
Bonus Screen
The "Choose Your Bonus" Screen
If you click on this, every bonus that you are currently eligible for will show. This is not just for new customer's initial deposit. This is the screen that will have all bonuses, including retention bonuses.
The Bonuses will have important information on them.

1. Type of currency
2. Type of game the bonus can be used on
3. The amount of the bonus
4. The minimum and maximum deposit
5. The rollover requirements if you choose this bonus. Bovada Bonus Screen. The "Choose Your Bonus" Screen If you click on this, every bonus that you are currently eligible for will show. This is not just for new customer's initial deposit. This is the screen that will have all bonuses, including retention bonuses. The Bonuses will have important information on them. Type of currency Type of game the bonus can be used on The amount of the bonus The minimum and maximum deposit The rollover requirements if you choose this bonus

Deposit Verification
Once you have chosen a bonus type and made a deposit. You will receive confirmation of your deposit. If you think there is a mistake. Contact customer service immediately so it can be corrected.Bovada Deposit VerificationOnce you have chosen a bonus type and made a deposit. You will receive confirmation of your deposit. If you think there is a mistake. Contact customer service immediately so it can be corrected.

What are the deposit limits?

Limits are based on the deposit method chosen. Please refer to the chart below, the limits indicated are on a per transaction basis:
Method Minimum Maximum
Visa/MasterCard * $20 / $1,500
BTC, BCH, BSV, LTC * $10 / $5,000
ETH * $50 / $5,000
Player Transfer * $10 / $15,000
Direct Bank Transfer * $50 / $450
MatchPay * $20 / $1,000
USDT * $5 / $5,000
\Deposit limits may differ per account; please check your limits in the cashier page for more information*
\*Amounts are in USD market equivalent; however, as these can fluctuate - Litecoin (LTC) and Ethereum (ETH) deposits of less than 0.01 LTC/ETH or Bitcoin (BTC) deposits of less than 0.0002 BTC will not be honored.* What are the deposit limits?Limits are based on the deposit method chosen. Please refer to the chart below, the limits indicated are on a per transaction basis:

Making a Withdrawal at Bovada

Once you have chosen the type. The next step is to choose the amount.
After selecting Request Withdrawal - below a "Reference Number" will be generated. If you have any questions about your withdrawal. Contact customer service and provide this number as verification for your withdrawal.
Before you withdraw, take note of the following:

• The amount of your withdrawal request is deducted from your account balance immediately for the review stage.
• Withdrawals are processed on a first-come, first served basis and take approximately 24-48 hours to be reviewed. With Bitcoin, Player Transfer and Voucher takes about 24 hours for approval.
• Delivery time frames vary depending on your method of withdrawal and can be viewed on the withdrawal screen for each method.
• We're unable to ship a check by courier withdrawal to a P.O. Box or military address. Double check your address on file to avoid any delivery delays.
• A $100 processing fee will be charged for each Check by Courier withdrawal request.
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Biggest Complaint at Bovada is the Roll over If you do not understand what a rollover requirement is then please take the time to read.What is rollover?Rollover, or play through, is the total monetary amount of bets (aka handle) you need to place in order to cash out your bonus along with any winnings attached to that bonus. When it comes to Rollover, your wins and losses don’t matter, each qualifying bet contributes to handle and the Rollover required.Sportsbook Details: Meeting Rollover in our Sportsbook is a tad different. For winning wagers we’ll credit the lesser of the risk amount or win amount. If your bet loses, your risk amount contributes toward Rollover no matter what. However, bets graded 'No Action', a tie or Pushed bet, along with canceled or voided bets, do not contribute in any way to the play through requirements of a bonus. Casino Details: There are also some games in the Casino that contribute differently to your requirement. For full bonus details, including the Play through Requirement for your bonus, click the drop-down menu or Bonus Description. If the bonus you’ve claimed is a Deposit Match, the requirement is a multiplier of the Bonus + The Deposit Amount:Ex. Deposit $100 + $100 Bonus = $200 X Rollover Multiplier (Varies by Bonus)
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TLDR; 28 year old guy wants someone to get to know deeply and hopefully build a lasting relationship with. Looking for someone who I can cook for, and will take the lead in the relationship.
Hi there! As the post says I’m a 28 year old childfree guy from the east coast of the US.
A bit about me: I work in finance and definitely spend too much time on that (hence why I want to find someone to spend more time with). As far as hobbies, etc. I love to travel and cook. I enjoy listening to music - mostly pop punk, Midwest emo, etc. I also like to watch TV and movies. The Office, HIMYM, Brooklyn 99 are all solid plus I’ll watch anything related to WWII or modern war (I’m a bit of a history buff). I also love football, baseball, and F1, though most sports can catch my interest as can just about anything with an engine. And as far as looks, I’m white, 6’0” with a slim-average build.
About what I’m looking for: ideally I’d like to find something long term but don’t want to force anything. Let’s chat and get to know each other and see what happens. Long distance relationships don’t bother me, at least to start. Eventually I’d want to close the gap though. I want someone who I can cook for at night while you sit with your feet up and a glass of wine. To massage you when you want it. To ensure you can do the things you want to do when you want them.
About you: I don’t necessarily have a type, I find attraction with a wide variety of people. So please don’t let age, height, weight, race, religion, style, gender identity, etc. prevent you from messaging me if you have read this far. I’m also open to finding someone from anywhere really. Ideally you like to take control in a relationship though, as I tend to follow along with my partner and do what I’m told.
Hoping to find some interesting people, send me just a little about yourself! Also, please tell me your favorite band in your first message to let me know you ready through this. I’m also happy to share photos if you’d like and I’m an open book, happy to answer any questions or talk about anything you’d like! Hope to hear from you soon!

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My friend Yan is putting on a comedy show at Cloud & Spirits this Thursday. Tickets are limited; go check it out I promise you'll have fun.

THURSDAY - MAY 16

Tapered Expectations XXI: "Above the Clouds" - A Standup Comedy Event @ Cloud & Spirits @ 7PM Acquired Taste Comedy is back at Cloud & Spirits with another signature Standup Comedy Event. Catch a carefully curated selection of the area's funniest comics along with a special musical guest at a breathtaking cocktail bar in Central Square!
Red Sox vs Rays @ Fenway Park @ 7:10PM
Asi Wind’s Magic Show @ The Wilbur @ 7:30PM Being one of the most-watched magicians in the world, Asi Wind presents a new show where he pushes the limits of belief even further with unbelievable mind-reading and astonishing magic.
Candlelight: A Tribute to Adele in Concert @ Temple Ohabei Shalom @ 7PM / 9PM
Marc Martel & One Vision of Queen Concert @ Symphony Hall @ 7:30PM The Pops will rock you when Marc Martel brings the iconic anthems of Queen to Symphony Hall.
Diana Ross @ Wang Theatre @ 7:30PM See the iconic and legendary Diana Ross perform the hits that have defined her career.
Cooper Alan @ Paradise Rock Club @ 8PM With Thomas Mac
Lords of Acid @ Brighton Music Hall @ 6:30PM
Ben Beal @ City Winery @ 7:30PM

FRIDAY - MAY 17

Bruins vs Panthers @ TD Garden
Madeleine Peyroux @ The Wilbur @ 8PM
Neil Young & Crazy Horse @ Xfinity Center @ 7:30PM
Wild Child @ Paradise Rock Club @ 8PM
Soen @ Brighton Music Hall @ 8PM
Tye Tribbett and Friends @ Orpheum Theatre @ 7:30PM
Galantis @ Big Night Live @ 9:30PM
Hermanos Gutiérrez @ Royale @ 6PM
Tinlicker @ Royale @ 10PM
Buck Meek of Big Thief @ Crystal Ballroom @ 8PM
Anders Osborne Trio @ City Winery @ 7:30PM

SATURDAY - MAY 18

Watertown Porchfest @ Watertown @ All day
Revolution vs Philadelphia Union @ Gillette Stadium @ 7:30PM
Dancing on the Charles @ Marsh Post #442 @ 3PM Montreal deep house DJ Fred Everything headlines this marathon outdoor dance party, running from late afternoon into the night.
Ales & Tales @ Stone Zoo @ 5:30PM Walk on the wild side while enjoying local craft beverages. This popular beer tasting event is a favorite among animal and beer lovers alike!
Kite & Bike Festival @ Franklin Park @ 12PM This Boston tradition brings families together to enjoy picnicking, kite flying, bicycles & music.
Ongoing - Artisan Market @ Rose Kennedy Greenway @ 11AM
Kevin James Comedy Show @ Chevalier Theatre @ 4:30PM / 7:30PM
Jimmy Failla Comedy Show @ Shubert Theatre @ 8PM
‘Encanto’ in Concert @ Symphony Hall @ 2PM Disney’s Academy Award-winning film comes to life in a concert event, featuring the entire feature-length film with a full orchestra performing the score.
The String Cheese Incident @ MGM Music Hall @ 7:15PM
Robyn Schall Stand Up @ The Wilbur @ 7PM
Sorry Papi @ House of Blues @ 9PM
James Arthur @ Roadrunner @ 8PM With Forest Blakk
The Music of Talking Heads & More for Kids @ Paradise Rock Club @ 11AM *Presented by The Rock and Roll Playhouse
Orgy + COLD @ Brighton Music Hall @ 8PM
Gimme Gimme Disco @ Big Night Live @ 5:30PM
Arty @ Big Night Live @ 10:30PM
The Messthetics and James Brandon Lewis @ Crystal Ballroom @ 8PM
Chris Smither + Peter Mulvey @ City Winery @ 7:30PM

SUNDAY - MAY 19

Celtics vs Cavaliers @ TD Garden
Kite Festival @ Revere Beach Kick off beach season with a fun day for the whole family complete with build-your-own kite stations, professional kite flyers, live music, and other activities!
Ongoing - Open Market @ SoWa @ 11AM One of the largest open-air farmer and artist markets returns this summer season!
‘Dropouts’ Podcast Live @ Paradise Rock Club @ 7PM Come see internet stars Zach Justice, Tara Yummy & Jared Bailey discuss latest hot topics, celebrity gossip, and personal dramas live!
Electric Callboy @ MGM Music Hall @ 7PM
Deko @ Brighton Music Hall @ 7PM With Yameii
Mk.gee @ The Sinclair @ 7:30PM
Guppy @ The Rockwell @ 7:30PM
Big Bad Voodoo Daddy @ The Wilbur @ 7PM
Compaq Big Band @ City Winery @ 7:30PM

ALL WEEKEND

FRIDAY & SATURDAY - Amanda Seales Stand Up @ Laugh Boston
FRIDAY & SATURDAY - Zach Brazao Stand Up @ Nick’s Comedy Stop @ 8PM
SATURDAY & SUNDAY - ‘Bluey’s Big Play’ Show @ Wang Theatre ‘Bluey’s Big Play’ is a brand-new theatrical adaptation of the Emmy award-winning children’s television series featuring new music and new character adventures.
All weekend - Jukebox The Ghost @ The Sinclair @ 8PM
All weekend - Nantucket Wine & Food Festival Enjoy food and drinks tastings, seminars, brunches, and parties as the annual festival uncorks the island for the summer!
All weekend -’Hallyu Hits: Korean Films that Moved the World @ MFA See the best of Korean cinema including ‘Oldboy,’ ‘Parasites,’ and ‘Burning.’
All weekend - ‘Spring Experience’ Ballet @ Citizens Bank Opera House LAST CHANCE - Explore Boston Ballet’s dynamic and captivating Spring program composed of three masterful ballets featuring classical and modern dance elements.
All weekend - ‘BABYBABYBABY’ Dance Performance @ Calderwood Pavilion This contemporary dance production taps into the feeling of falling in love and reflects on the human impulse for connection and intimacy.
All weekend - ‘A Strange Loop’ Musical @ Wimberly Theatre Winner of Pulitzer Prize and a Tony Award, Michael R. Jackson’s blisteringly funny masterwork exposes the heart and soul of a young Black artist grappling with desires, identity, and instincts he both loves and loathes.
All weekend - ‘Jersey Boys’ Musical @ North Shore Music Theatre LAST CHANCE - Featuring legendary hits, this award-winning musical tells the behind-the-scenes drama of the international sensation boy band The Four Seasons.
All weekend - ‘Toni Stone’ Play @ The Huntington Theatre The Huntington’s season finale is a beautiful, rich portrait of a trailblazing woman. Follow the inspiring and life-affirming story of baseball legend Toni Stone.
All weekend - ‘Romeo and Juliet’ Play @ Calderwood Pavilion Brought to life by Actors’ Shakespeare Project, Shakespeare’s most famous duo return in a flurry of forbidden love, exhilarating fight scenes, and tragic fate.
All weekend - ‘Mermaid Hour’ Play @ Arrow Street Arts LAST CHANCE - Fast-paced, funny, and heartfelt, ‘Mermaid Hour’ follows two parents and their trans teen kid as they all seek to understand who they are and who they wish to be.

ONGOING

Ongoing - Immersive Disney Animation @ Boch Center Step into the art and legacy of Walt Disney Animation Studios and celebrate the music, artistry and animation from the creators of Frozen, The Little Mermaid, Big Hero 6 and many more.
Ongoing - Musical Shows @ MoS Planetarium Museum of Science puts on special experiences adapting the music of Pink Floyd, Rihanna, Beyoncé, and The Divas to immersive visuals in the Charles Hayden Planetarium.
Ongoing - ‘Firelei Báez’ Exhibition @ ICA One of the most exciting painters of her generation, Báez explores the multilayered legacy of colonial histories and the African diaspora in the Caribbean and beyond.
Ongoing - ‘Wordplay’ Exhibition @ ICA Highlighting the rich interplay between imagery and text, the exhibition showcases how contemporary artists have played with words to animate and expand their art practices.
Ongoing - ‘Hallyu! The Korean Wave’ Exhibition @ MFA Enjoy an immersive and multisensory journey through Korea’s fascinating history, and celebrate its contemporary vibrant creative force.
Ongoing - ‘Dress Up’ Exhibition @ MFA Through more than 100 works from the MFA’s collection including 20th- and 21st-century clothing, jewelry, accessories, illustrations, and photographs, this exhibition explores adornment and its role in the creation of a look.
Ongoing - ‘Comrade Sisters: Women of the Black Panther Party’ Exhibition @ MFA This exhibition brings together 27 powerful photographs by Stephen Shames that feature the women of the Black Panther party and showcase their crucial work for the movement.
Ongoing - ‘Thinking Small: Dutch Art to Scale’ Exhibition @ MFA Featuring 15 intriguing objects from 17th-century Netherlands such as paintings, prints, silver medals, and books, this exhibition compels viewers to reconsider their relationship to the world around them.
Ongoing - ‘Raqib Shaw: Ballads of East and West’ Exhibition @ ISG Museum Shaw’s images of magic and mystery combine Western artistic tradition with ornamental elements derived from the Japanese, Persian, and Indian cultures that he vividly remembers from his youth.
Ongoing - ‘Picasso: War, Combat, and Revolution’ Exhibition @ Harvard Art Museums The exhibition explores the dictator Francisco Franco’s Spain, imagery of death, struggles of good and evil, political and artistic revolution, and issues of desire and capture.
Ongoing - ‘Our Time on Earth’ Exhibition @ Peabody Essex Museum This traveling exhibition from the Barbican Centre in London celebrates the power of global creativity to transform the conversation around the climate emergency.
Ongoing - ‘AI: Mind the Gap’ Exhibition @ MIT Museum MIT Museum presents its latest riveting, interactive exhibit exploring the tremendous promise, unforeseen impacts, and everyday misconceptions of AI.

TLDR; 28 year old guy wants someone to greet to know deeply and hopefully build a lasting relationship with someone who I can cook for, etc.
Hi there! As the post says I’m a 28 year old guy from the east coast of the US.
A bit about me: I work in finance and definitely spend too much time on that (hence why I want to find someone to spend more time with). As far as hobbies, etc. I love to travel and cook. I enjoy listening to music - mostly pop punk, Midwest emo, etc. I also like to watch TV and movies. The Office, HIMYM, Brooklyn 99 are all solid plus I’ll watch anything related to WWII or modern war (I’m a bit of a history buff). I also love football, baseball, and F1, though most sports can catch my interest as can just about anything with an engine. And as far as looks, I’m white, 6’0” with a slim-average build and I’ve been told I’m a bit of a golden retriever.
About what I’m looking for: ideally I’d like to find something long term but don’t want to force anything. Let’s chat and get to know each other and see what happens. Long distance relationships don’t bother me, at least to start. Eventually I’d want to close the gap though. I want someone who I can cook for at night while you sit with your feet up and a glass of wine. To massage you when you want it. To ensure you can do the things you want to do when you want them.
About you: I don’t necessarily have a type, I find attraction with a wide variety of people. So please don’t let age, height, weight, race, religion, style, gender identity, etc. prevent you from messaging me if you have read this far. I’m also open to finding someone from anywhere really.
Hoping to find some interesting people, send me just a little about yourself! Also, please tell me your favorite band in your first message to let me know you ready through this. I’m also happy to share photos if you’d like and I’m an open book, happy to answer any questions or talk about anything you’d like! Hope to hear from you soon!

Hi lads,
I've been following MLB closely for the past 2 years and frankly I've really enjoyed how amazing some teams can play defensively and offensively. Now, I'm stuck at the million dollar question which team to root for...
I follow a couple of teams mainly because of their decent hitting ability such as the Phillies, Padres, Reds, Yankees and Dodgers. That being said I still can't decide which team to support. Also, I should mention I'm from down under (AUS) so watching mlb games is a morning thing for me...crazy, I know hehe. I should mention watching games in the American east coast is a literal 3am nightmare that I cannot afford so I am automatically biased to support a team leaning towards the Western or Western-Central side of the league map.
It would be great if you knowledgeable bunch could throw some opinions, tips or even straight team names that have a generally friendly/ accepting fan base for newbies like myself. I don't have a personal favourite yet but I wouldn't mind investing time in one or two teams Max, the team doesnt need to be super star studded, or super long history wise, but being strong offensively is a biggie for me personally - I love seeing hits.
Thanks in advance for your time lads, baseball is amazing!!!
Peace ✌️

I watched, "Take Me out, to The Holodeck", tonight, on "Deep Space Nine", and have always enjoyed it (personally, I would have "trained", a little harder). I noticed Ben Sisko, had a San Francisco "Giants", ball cap, on, at practice, and Jake had, a California "Angels" ball cap, on.
I wondered, Whom I would "represent", and here are my ideas.

1. Cleveland "Indians", "Guardians", or "Brown Sox". While Original Americans had a problem, with The "Indians", or "Chief Wahoo", I believe no "slight", was intended. I believe, too; that there was more History, and tradition, with The "Indians", and some versions of the ball cap, made no reference to "Chief Wahoo" I don't know, what The "Guardians" Cap, or Uniform, is, but I might have used that. I submitted "Brown Sox", as Cleveland's new Name, and there was a lot of History, that went with that Choice. Cleveland has a long History, with The Football Browns, and Their first Owner-Manager, Paul Brown; so, Brown Sox, was a natural. The Uniform would have had, a dark beige, orange, black motif; and Cleveland, at one time, had a Baseball Team, called The "Spiders", hence the black trim, with a black Spider, on The Cap, or a black "C", and a black spider, on the left, where a "pocket" would be, and about that size, with Brown socks.
   
2. Cincinnati "Red Stockings", "Redlegs", or "Reds". Cincinnati has a long, and proud, History, in Baseball, and, The Cincinnati "Red Stockings", was The first Professional Baseball Team.
   
3. Columbus "Redbirds", "Jets", or "Clippers". Columbus has had a Minor League, First Level, Baseball Team, for many Years, lately; at The AAA Level, in The International League. As the "Redbirds", I believe the Major League Team, was The St. Louis Cardinals. Not Sure, about The Jets; but The New York Yankees, was The Major League Affiliate, at one time; and currently, The Clippers have The Cleveland Guardians.
   
4. The Ohio State Buckeyes Baseball Team. I am from Columbus, and Ohio State, was My Alma Mater.
   
5. The Pittsburgh "Pirates". Neat Colors, and logo, and The "traditional cap", is cool. Pittsburgh is also, "Ohio's "Next Door" Neighbor, with a large Ohio Following.
   
6. The Detroit "Tigers". Same Reason, as Pittsburgh.
   
7. The Toledo "Mud Hens". Neat Mascot, and Colors, and Toledo is, Ohio's other AAA Minor League Team. I believe they are also, Detroit's AAA "Farm Club".
   

I’ll start this off with I love baseball. But we have come to the point where our sport has become regional.
Point #1 - I feel once sportscenter died out and we couldn’t easily and readily see baseball highlights from around the US then baseball began its slow descent to what it is now, which is somewhat of a niche sport. I would say social media is what sportscenter was for baseball 15 yrs ago but question 1 is do you guys see baseball highlights on social media in the same volume as other sports? I don’t believe we do, leaving me to think how is baseball going to acquire new fans if they aren’t seeing our best players play? What is the mlb strategy to acquire new fans or keep fans engaged in the era of short 10-30 second clips ?
Point #2- baseball games in person are insanely expensive. In NY they charge fans $40 dollars to park, $15+ for beer, $20+ for food. If your ticket is $40 then that is a very conservative estimate of $105/person and it’s probably more like $120-150/person…to bring a family to the game is ridiculously expensive. Did I mention the game is only 2.5 hours now. Overall, is it really worth going to a game now?
Conclusion- based on the points above it just feels like the MLB is not trying to grow the game. It seems like they will not spend money and resources for fan engagement to grow the game and instead find ways to get more $/existing customer by raising prices. With the baby boomers unfortunately decreasing by the day baseball needs to focus on fan engagement or else our beloved game will die and it’ll happen quickly, perhaps in a decade or two…how and who can fix this ? If our game dies I feel a big piece of our history dies. It’s evident now more than ever the commissioner and players union doesn’t care about the integrity and future of our game so who will stand up for the fans and the game ?

I accidentally posted this to my username instead of my subreddit so here is is:
The Mortgage, Part 3
“Fuck,” I said as I drove to work in the old beater that only started on the fourth try because it could tell that I was pissed off. Ray’s case started at two o’clock, and I was heading to the office to get ready. “Fuck fuck fuckity fucking fuck. Fuck.” I’d wanted to tell Angela about Ray’s case, and how I was sorry that I hadn’t wanted to help him, but now I would, I would help him, and I would win, but then I’d gotten her all riled up on something else, something totally different, something way more serious.
My wife had given me a triple ultimatum: fix things up with her father, save idiot Ray from Sy-Co Corp., and somehow find a downpayment for the place she wanted to buy, in the little townhouse infill project in Bixity. It was like demanding I do a double bank shot, and then run over to the baseball diamond and hit a home run after first pointing to where it would land, Babe Ruth style.
Angela was mad at me, seriously mad. She’d slipped out that morning before I was even awake, sliding quietly past me on the couch. I didn’t realize she was gone until I heard the faint click of the front door closing. I jumped up, tripped over a blanket, and by the time I got up and my robe on, the elevator down the hall dinged, and Angela was gone before I opened the apartment door.
I swore at myself some more and pounded the steering wheel, “I fucked up,” I said, several times as I hit the wheel over and over again, until I accidentally honked it, and then looked all sheepish when the guy in front of me gave me the finger. I reached my office without further incident, but instead of walking in the front door, I went further down the hall, and into the office of Mark Cecil-Rowe, Barrister, LL.D, the man with the finest speaking voice I ever heard. When I entered his office I forgot for a minute about Angela and her father and sleeping on the couch the night before. I forget about everything, except the reason that I had come to Cecil-Rowe’s office: to stump him with a legal problem that I had solved, but which I was pretty sure he could not. In other words, I had come to preen and to brag and to boast. No one likes a showoff, and I had come to show off. I put my hand on the door and turned the knob. After a brief pause, I flung open the door.
“I’m a goddamn genius,” I said as I strolled into the older man’s office.
I noticed the echo of a hastily closed desk drawer hanging in the air. In Aaron’s office, where I rented space, a sudden act of concealment implied cocaine, but with Cecil-Rowe, the item in question was probably a mickey of vodka. I had the sense that he’d been drinking a bit before I arrived, but his powers of observation were unimpaired, and when he looked into my face, his expression showed sympathy, and actual pain.
“What have you done now?” he said, as set the papers before him to one side, and readied himself to hear my latest tale of legal brilliance.
“I’m a genius,” I said.
“Oh dear. Have a seat.”
“No really, I am. I’m a genius. I got this case that everyone says you can’t win, but I’m gonna win it, and when I do, I’m gonna look like a genius.” Cecil-Rowe gave me a sad indulgent smile.
“Whenever you tell me you’re a genius, I am always concerned about what is to follow. When you get wrapped up in what you call your genius, you tend to ignore the more mundane things we lawyers have to do to win a case. You think you’re going to win by genius alone.”
“Let me tell you why I’m a goddamn genius.” With effort I wiped the smug, self-satisfied expression that was on my face.
“Tell me why you’re a genius,” Cecil-Rowe said, “while I pour us a coffee.” He heaved his bulky body up from his chair and shuffled over to a counter. He picked up a carafe of hot coffee sitting on a hot plate, and poured two cups. “Speak,” he said, handing me one. I took a sip of the coffee, and told Cecil-Rowe the tale of Cousin Ray: his purchase of a franchise from Sy-Co Corp, its swift demise, the crash and burn in Commercial Court, the Minutes of Settlement, the seventy-one kilometer limit, and lastly, Sy-Co’s motion scheduled for two p.m. that very day, seeking an interim injunction shutting down Ray’s place.
Cecil-Rowe absorbed all this without the need to take notes. Instead, he sat back while he eyed me, taking the occasional sip of coffee, and smiling at the extravagant flourishes and details that brought out Ray’s story to full effect.
“Obviously Ray is dead on arrival,” he said, “but I guess this is the part where you tell me how you’re going to win.”
So I told him how I was going to win, but it didn’t have the desired effect. “I told ya I’m a genius, Mr. C,” cueing him to applaud, to admit what a brilliant lawyer I was. But there was no applause from Mark Cecil-Rowe. He looked at me without so much as a smile.
“You can cling to that genius notion as a consolation prize, after you get whipped this afternoon in court.”
“No way,” I said, “not a chance. I got this thing won hands down. I’m gonna kick ass in court today and--”
“And how exactly do you plan to do that, if you don’t have evidence?”
“What?”
“Evidence, Calledinthe9os. It’s what lawyers like me use to beat geniuses like you.”
“But I’m gonna win without proof. I don’t need proof. The argument I’m gonna make, relies on simple facts that are totally obvious, so the judge is gonna--” Cecil-Rowe stuck up his hand.
“Stop right there. I know what’s coming. You’re going to ask the judge to take *judicial notice.”
And he was right. That was exactly what I was going to do.
There are some things so obvious that you didn’t have to prove them, things that everyone knew. You didn’t have to prove that water froze at zero degrees and boiled at a hundred, or that Bixity was between West Bay and East Bay.
“You got it,” I said, “judicial notice all the way.”
“You’re going to tell the judge that the centerpiece of your argument, the lynchpin of your case is a fact known to pretty well everyone, and so you don’t need proof.”
“Exactly,” I said. Cecil-Rowe took another sip of his coffee, and left me hanging in the silence for a while before he spoke.
“If that’s true, then why does coming up with that argument make you a genius?”
“Oh, I said,”I didn’t think of that.”
“It is acceptable to rely on judicial notice for minor, ancillary points. But you never should walk into court thinking that the court will take judicial notice of your entire defence. It’s just too risky.”
“But how am I going to rustle up a witness in time for this afternoon?”
“Worry about that after you leave my office. I can’t help you with that. What I want to know, is why you’re doing this at the last minute.”
“What makes you think I’m doing this at the last minute?”
“Because you never would have resorted to judicial notice if you were properly prepared. If you’d opened this case a bit earlier, you’ve have everything lined up. But you got to work on it late, and so you want to rely on judicial notice. You’ve messed up, Calledinthe90s, and you know what my rule is when you mess up.” Cecil-Rowe didn’t extend aid to me, until I admitted the error of my ways. It was infuriating, but he was inflexible. So I fessed up.
“My idiot cousin Ray’s been trying to retain me for almost two weeks, but I was putting him off because I was mad at him. So now my wife’s mad at me, and if I don’t win this case, I’m dead. Plus her dad’s mad at me too and --” My brain roared into overdrive, a mess of family and law and fear, and at the centre of it, thoughts of Angela’s anger and her father. My mind took off, and then came to an instant halt at a helpful destination.
“Yes?” Cecil-Rowe said.
“Sorry. I just realized how to solve the evidence problem. Look, can I ask you about the thing I actually came here to ask you about?”
“You have a problem that’s worse than having no evidence? What could be worse than -- oh. You don’t have a retainer. Your client doesn't have any money.”
“Exactly. How do I get paid? That’s the problem.” I explained that Ray had no money, as in none, and that if he did have money, he wouldn’t spend it on me. Instead, he’d go back downtown and throw his cash at some big firm, who would take on his case, and proceed to lose it in a calm, careful, sober manner, ending in a reporting letter to Ray telling him that he’d lost.
“Now that’s a problem I can solve,” Cecil-Rowe said.
“Really? ‘Cause I can’t see a way around it. I think I’m gonna have to do this for free, and that really pisses me off.” Cecil-Rowe shook his head.
“You may or may not get paid, but you can set things up so that if you win, you’ll win pretty good.”
“How? Ray’s a deadbeat. Tapped out.”
“But is he desperate?”
“Totally. The first time he failed, he lost his own money, but if he goes under this time, he’s taking family money with him, and he’ll be the black sheep forever.”
“And he’s using family to emotionally blackmail you into helping him?’
“Like no shit. That’s the part that pisses me off the most. I’m like a goddamn slave, being forced to work for free.”
“Never fear, young apprentice. I have just the thing in mind.” He reached into a drawer, and pulled out a form. “Fill in the blanks, and have him sign.”
I looked it over, and saw that the document was a retainer agreement. I whistled. “Holy shit. If he signs this, he’s almost my slave.”
“Close, but not quite” Cecil-Rowe said, “the Latin term for this is "contractus pro venditione animae"”. It’s the ultimate retainer agreement. Once Ray signs that, you own any cause of action he has against the person suing him. You can settle the case on any terms you like, and you get to keep whatever proceeds there are.” Cecil-Rowe placed the folder back in a drawer, and from his manner you could tell that the interview was over.
“Awesome, Mr. C. I’ll call you from Commercial Court when we’re done.”
“Commercial Court?” he said.
“Yeah, Commercial Court.”
“This just keeps getting worse. Take notes, Calledinthe90s, while I school you on Commercial Court. Commercial Court is a jungle, and without preparation, you’ll get savaged.”
“That’s what happened to Ray when--”
“Take notes, young apprentice,” he said, tossing me a pad and a pen. He started to lecture, and I took notes that I have with me to this day, in a safe deposit box downstairs in the vault at Mega Bank Main Branch.
* * *
By the time Cecil-Rowe finished schooling me, it was close to ten, and the case started at two. I didn’t have much time. I ran down the hall to my office, and called Ray’s restaurant. No answer. Then I called Ray’s house. I expected to get Ray’s wife, but the man himself answered.
“You’re not at work. Why aren’t you at work?”
“Sy-Co Corp served all my employees with a cease and desist letter. They all got scared and took off. The place is shut down.”
“You gotta fax machine at home?” He did, and asked why.
“I’m taking your case, but only if you sign the paper I’m about to send and fax it back.” I sent the fax, and five minutes later it came back signed, and it was official: Ray had sold me his legal soul.
I went out to the parking lot, got into my beater and drove fast. In less than thirty minutes I reached my destination. I knocked on the door, and when it opened, my diminutive mother-in-law poked out her head. “What a pleasant surprise,” she said.
“Sorry, Mrs. M, but I’m in a super hurry. I gotta rush to get to court to help Ray. But first, I gotta speak to Dr. M.”
“He’s not here,” she said.
“Not here?”
“He’s on his way to his bridge game. He left just a few minutes ago.”
“Where’s the club?”
“He’s walking there,” she said, and pointed down the street.
“Thanks.” I got into my car and headed where Mrs. M had pointed, passing big houses and new project with an “Opening Soon” sign. And walking past it was the figure of Dr. M.
“Hey, Dr. M,” I called out the window. He stopped and looked around, startled. But he didn’t see me, not at first.
“It’s me, Dr. M. Me, Calledin90s.” He leaned forward as if to see me better. I got out of the car.
“Is something wrong with Angela? Or the baby?”
“No, no not at all, sorry to scare you, it’s nothing like that. I need your help.”
“Oh.” He started walking again, and now it was my turn to be a bit stunned, watching my father-in-law walk away from me. I caught up with him in a few quick strides.
“Listen, I really need your help.”
“And I really need to get to a bridge game.”
“This isn’t about me. It’s about Ray.” That brought him to a halt. He turned to me, angrier even than he’d been the night before.
“Did you drive all the way out here just to make fun of me? To remind me of how you won, distracting me with nonsense about Ray’s case?”
“I mean it,” I said, “I can win Ray’s case. I can prove it in a few words.”
“Prove it, then.” So I did. I spoke words, only a few words, but they were the right words to speak to Dr. M, for the words I spoke were in his language, words that he understood perfectly.
“I understand,” he said, “you’ve come to boast some more, to prove that you were right after all.”
“I want to win Ray’s case, but I don’t have any proof of what I’m saying.”
“You don’t need to prove that two plus two is four.”
“This, I gotta prove, and I need you to help me prove it. I need you to come to court with me, as my witness.”
“I can’t do that. I didn’t witness anything.”
“As my witness. My expert witness.” Unlike a normal witness, an expert witness can give an opinion. An expert is there not to advocate, I explained to Dr. M but to instruct, to teach.
“My bridge partner won’t be very happy,” he said.
“But Ray will, and so will Mrs. M and Angela and--”
“Very well. Do you have a cell phone? We can call the bridge club from my car.”
* * *
We were on the highway getting close to the downtown exit, when my wife called my cell phone. Back then cell phone service was super expensive and my wife only used it for emergencies. Or when she was really angry. I picked up the phone, wondering which it would be.
“I’m so happy that you made things up with my father,” she said.
“How did you know?”
“My mother called. She says you took him with you, that you went out together.”
“He’s with me right now,” I said.
“Where are you going?”
“To court. Going to court to win Ray’s case for him.”
“And you brought my father with you to watch?” She was so happy, I could hear in her voice that she was smiling. “That’s a great way to bond with him, Calledinthe90s. Look, I’m sorry I got so mad at you earlier, I really am. My dad’s a bit too sensitive and--”
“Sorry, Angela, your dad’s not coming to watch me.”
“Why is he with you, then?”
“He’s my witness,” I said.
“What?”
“His expert witness,” Dr. M said, loudly enough for Angela to hear.
My wife’s anger exploded into the phone. She wanted to know how I could expose her elderly, vulnerable father to the stress of a court case. I tried to tell her how I needed him, how there was literally no one else I could turn to, that her father was an expert, a true expert, and the judge was legally bound to believe him, but Angela heard none of this.
“Look,’ I said, “I promise you that--” And then I lowered the phone and pushed the red button, terminating the call. I’d learned that the best way to hang up on someone, was to do it when I was doing the talking. That way it looked like the call had dropped.
“I’m going to steal that move,” Dr. M said.
We rolled into the parking lot. I grabbed the cloth bag out of the back of my car, the bag that held my law robes and shirt and tabs, plus the other stuff I needed for court. It was one-thirty, still thirty minutes to go, not a lot of time to get robed and ready for court. It was just past one-forty five when I, with Dr. M in tow, opened the door to a courtroom on the eighth floor of an old insurance building that had been converted into a courthouse, the home of Commercial Court.
“Commercial Court is an exclusive club,” Cecil-Rowe had explained to me earlier that day, “the legal playground of the rich and powerful. They’ll know instantly that you’re not one of them.” And he was right. It was clear from the moment I walked in that I did not belong, for I was the only lawyer in robes. Everyone else was wearing a suit, and not some cheap thing off the rack like I wore.
There were a half-dozen lawyers present, and after they saw me, they exchanged knowing looks about the stranger amongst them. I ignored them, and walked up to the Registrar. I told him the case I was on, and he signed me in.
“First time in Commercial Court?” he said, eyeing my robes. “You know you don’t have to be robed in Commercial Court.” In other Superior Courts, you always had to bring your robes and get all dressed up. But Commercial Court had its own set of rules, and in the court for rich people, their lawyers did not have to wear robes.
“You’re here on the Sy-Co case?” a young woman asked. She was a junior like me, give a year or two either way. She was dressed in the finest downtown counsel fashion, some designer thing that Angela would know if she saw it.
“Just got retained,” I said.
“You know there’s no adjournments, right? We don’t do adjournments in Commercial Court. I’m just trying to be helpful, because I don’t think you've been here before. You know you don’t have to be robed, right?
“So I heard.”
“So where’s your material? You haven’t served anything, so how do you plan to argue your case?”
“I gotta witness,” I said.
She smiled. “There’s no viva voce evidence, either. Affidavit only.”
“We’ll see what the judge says.” There was a knock from the other side of the door to the judge’s chambers, and then the man himself entered.
I was amazed to see that even the judge wasn’t wearing a robe; instead, he was wearing a light coloured suit and a bright blue bow tie. He was dressed as good as the lawyers, all part of the downtown Commercial Court club, the playground of the richest and most powerful corporations in the City.
“Commercial Court’s not like other courts,” Cecil-Rowe told me earlier that day, explaining that most cases were over in fifteen minutes or less. A plaintiff showed up with some papers, and had a short consultation with the judge. The judge signed an order granting an injunction, or taking away a man’s business, or freezing his money. Commercial Court is where you went to get quick and simple court orders that eviscerated your opponent before the case even got going.
Defendants would appear sometimes in Commercial Court, Cecil-Rowe explained, but it was usually their last time up. Defendants always died a quick death in Commercial Court.
The judge took his seat, and then looked over the lawyers before him. His eyes moved along, and then stopped when they reached me, the one lawyer who was not like the others.
“You don’t need robes in Commercial Court,” the judge said to me.
“I’ll remember that for next time,” I said.
“What case are you on?”
I told him.
“He’s filed no responding materials,” my opponent said, “nothing at all.”
“I’m just vetting the list,” the judge said, “I’ll circle back to you two in a few minutes.” I listend while the judge vetted the rest of the afternoon list: a Mareva, plus a Norwich order, with counsel on those cases sent away in a matter of minutes.
Now the courtroom was almost empty, just the judge, two lawyers, the registrar and my star witness and father-in-law, Dr. M, who sat in the back of the courtroom dressed in an old business suit, put on hastily at his place two hours earlier, when I urged him to hurry it up, to not waste so much time on picking a suit.
“Back to you,” the judge said, addressing my opponent, “I thought this was an uncontested matter. That’s what your confirmation sheet said.”
“I’m sorry, Your Honour, but I didn’t know until I got here that the case was defended.”
“I got retained at the last minute,” I said, “barely three hours ago, the day after I read the papers. But I’m ready to go, ready to argue the case on the merits, so long as you grant me an indulgence, and let me call my witness, to let him testify in person instead of by affidavit, there being no time for me to draft anything.”
Opposing counsel was on her feet. “That’s not how things are done in Commercial Court,” she said, “or any court that I know of, for that matter. My friend (that’s what they make lawyers call each other in court, ‘my friend,’ even though you might hate the other guy’s guts),” the lawyer said, “my friend should have served his responding materials and filed them with the court. Instead, he’s taken us totally by surprise.”
“I’m sorry my friend is surprised by opposition,” I said, “but then consider, it’s my client’s livelihood that’s at stake. If my friend gets her injunction, Ray Telewu’s business is dead, and he loses everything. So yes, my client opposes the injunction, and yes, I’d like to call evidence.”
The judge didn’t consult the papers before him nor the books, but instead, he looked up at the big white clock on the courtroom wall. Its hands said two-fifteen.
“How long will your witness take, counsel?”
“In chief, ten minutes.” I’d practiced with Dr. M on the way in, and I was pretty sure he could do it in five, but I gave him a bit of extra time, just in case.
“We’ve got about two hours,” the judge said, “but I want to be fair to you and your client. Let’s take a fifteen minute recess so you can get instructions. Either we go ahead today with viva voce evidence, or we adjourn, and that will give Calledinthe90s time to file responding materials.”
When everyone came back, the junior’s boss was there, Senior Counsel, a heavy weight, one of those big guys downtown. Plus they brought this guy from Sy-Co Corp, the head of some bullshit division, with some bullshit title, Head of whatever, so that’s the title I’ll give him here. He was The Head. He was the man, the big cheese, the signer of the affidavit on which Sy-Co relied that day.
“What’s he doing here?” I asked Senior Counsel.
He stared at me, all lean and steel grey, looking every inch the hard hitting lawyer that commanded the biggest fees. “If you’re calling a live witness, then so can we. The Head will give evidence today, in advance of your client, so that the judge hears it from him first.” His junior smirked at me, and the two of them sat down, delighted that they’d thought of a way to one up me.
Except that they’d done it by exposing their client to cross-examination. The judge came in, allowed the Head to testify, and when he was done, I stood up.
“Just a few questions,” I said. Senior Counsel was stunned for an instant, and then he stood.
“This serves no purpose, Your Honour. The witness has confirmed the simple facts of his affidavit, and there’s no disputing it. Ray Telewu opened a restaurant less than seventy-one kilometres from Bixity City Hall, and that’s in breach of the Minutes of Settlement he signed.”
I did not bother to respond. Instead, I just stood, and I started to ask questions.
“Have a look at that map in your affidavit,” I said, and he did. I picked up my copy, and tore the map out of it. I passed it up to him.
“What do you notice about this map?”
“That it’s accurate,” the Head said, repeating his evidence in chief, amplifying it, talking about how the map contained perfect measurement.
“You will notice that the map is flat,” I said, laying it on the witness box before him.
“Of course it’s flat. That’s what maps are. Maps are flat.”
“But the earth is round,” I said, “or more properly, a sphere.” Senior Counsel was on his feet in an instant.
“What difference does that make?” he said.
“What you’ll hear from my expert witness, is that a flat map cannot accurately show Earth’s curves. A flat map distorts distances, and in this case, reduces them.”
“But that can’t be by very much.”
“In this case, by just over twenty meters,” Dr. M said from the back of the court.
“That’s my expert witness, the esteemed Dr. M.” I didn’t actually say Dr. M. Instead, I said his real name. But I’m not going to use the real names of my family here, so I’ll just keep calling him Dr. M. “Dr. M was a professor of Physics at the University of Bixity for almost thirty years. He has published numerous papers on particle physics, and is the first Canadian winner of the Wolf Prize for physics.”

• * * *

It went downhill after that for Sy-Co Corp. My father-in-law testified, explaining in simple language, language that even a child could understand, that the Earth was a sphere, that the shortest distance between two points on Earth was a curve, not a straight line. He summarized his calculations in plain English, dumbing down the math, so that everyone present imagined, if only for the moment, that they shared his understanding of a difficult mathematical equation.
Senior Counsel tried to cross-examine Dr. M, but it did not go well, my father-in-law indulging him, gently chiding him, continuing his explanations until the lawyer sat down, defeated by Dr. M’s mastery of the subject,his own lack of preparation and his inability to improvise. When counsel said that he had no further questions, the judge addressed us all.
“I’m not going to reserve, and I don’t think I need to tell everyone why. I think it will take about a minute for me to write a decision saying that the Earth is not flat. I’ll give you some more time after that, but after fifteen minutes, I”ll be back to render my decision.” He rose, everyone bowed, and he disappeared behind the door to judge’s chambers.
I pulled a piece of paper out of my file, and slammed it on the desk before Senior Counsel and his junior. “Fill in the blanks, and sign,” I said.
Dr. M’s head shot up at the commotion, and he shuffled over to see what was going on.
“What’s this?” Senior Counsel said, picking up the paper I gave him..
“Minutes of Settlement. You fill in a number, a big number, for the costs you gotta pay me. Your client signs, and then we’re done.” Senior Counsel opened his mouth to bargain, but I overrode him.
“You know your client’s going to lose; the judge made that obvious. Hurry up if you want to settle; we don’t have much time.”
At the end of most Canadian court cases, the loser has to pay at least part of the winner’s legal fees. That’s the way it’s been since forever, and I think it’s a good rule. Sy-Co Corp had lost, so it had to pay a good chunk of Ray’s costs, and Ray’s costs were somewhere between whatever bullshit figure I claimed they were, and where they actually ought to be. Senior Counsel took the paper over to his client. There was a brief discussion, and then they came back, with the form signed, and a number written in the blank space.
I’ll give it to Sy-Co Corp and their lawyer. It wasn’t a bullshit number, a low ball number. They gave me a real number, a number more like something I’d actually accept, a number that made sense to pay me in costs, in light of the success I’d had, and how I got it. It was a respectful number, a common sense number, and I appreciated it an awful lot.
I tossed the paper back at them.
“Add a zero,” I said, continuing on when Senior Counsel blanched, and his junior retreated a step. “I know what’s going on here. Your client sold mine a bullshit franchise, one with a history of failing.” The franchise had opened up again under a new owner not long after Ray had lost it and then it promptly failed again. Like I said at the start of this story, it’s an old story. It’s how some franchise companies make money. “Your client makes more money selling bullshit franchises doomed to fail, then it does from the honest ones that make money. So add a zero to that number, or Ray’s gonna sue you, class action and all that, for all the people you’ve fucked.”
The Head stepped forward from the benches and spoke to me.
“We get threats like that all the time, but no one follows through. They don’t have the money to fight us, and neither does your client. So go ahead and sue.”
“It’s true that Ray doesn’t have jack shit,” I said, “not a pot to piss in, but he’s my cousin, Ray is, and even if he doesn’t have money, he’s got me. Ray’s family, and for Ray, I’ll sue you guys for free. Hell, I’ll even pay the expenses. Plus I’m gonna put a jury notice in, too, come to think of it, ‘cause juries--”
Senior Counsel cut me off, and moved his client to the back of the courtroom. There was a brief discussion, and then they came back. I watched as Senior Counsel wrote a single digit on the Minutes, a zero, written right where I wanted it.
“You’ll have to initial the change,” I said to the Head of Sy-C0, and it gave me great satisfaction to watch him sign.
“Don’t forget,” I said the moment his pen stopped moving, “for the settlement to be valid, I need to get the money today. Right now.”
“Can’t it wait until tomorrow?” the Head said.
“Not if you want the settlement to stay in place. I’ll follow you back to your office, and you can put a cheque in my hands.”

• * * *

“What’s this?” my wife said when I entered the apartment later that day, after I’d driven Dr. M home, stopping first at a local pub for beers.
“It’s an absurdly expensive bunch of flowers,” I said, “although no flowers, however beautiful, however expensive, could expiate my--”
She took the flowers, and gave a kiss.
“My mom called. She told me what happened. You fixed things with my dad.”
“Yup,” I said. I had certainly done that. I’d made Dr. M a professor again, if only for a few minutes. Not only a professor, but an expert witness. The judge had declared him an expert in plain terms and Dr.M had beamed when he’d heard those words.
“And you won Ray’s case, too. But my mom didn’t know how, and I don’t know how you did it either.”
“I’ll tell you over dinner tonight,” I said.
“But we agreed no more dinners out; we have to save money, now that a baby’s coming.”
I passed her the envelope that I’d received a few hours before. She opened it, and took out a cheque, a cheque drawn up for an amount I specified, made payable to Mr. and Mrs. Calledinthe90s.
The moment I got that cheque, all I could think about was how my wife would react when I put it into her hands. I could not wait to see her eyes bulge, to hear her voice say “oh my god,” to hear her laugh.
She did none of these things. Instead, she cried.
“Does this mean we can buy a house?” The money wouldn’t be enough to buy a house, not nowadays, with prices being so crazy. But things were different back then in the 90s. Sure, the internet was barely a thing and cell phones were super expensive and a lot of things sucked, but I’ll give the nineties one thing: houses were cheap.
“I think so,” I said.

OOC: co-written with NotTooSunny
It was an ordinary day at the New York City Library. People wandered in and out of the building, unaware of the monster that lurked among them.
The only people who seemed to know the danger these mortals were in were Harper and Amon, who entered the building with glowing bronze swords at their hips. The bulky weapons seemed to have escaped the notice of the other library patrons, which was a good thing. The job description had made it clear that they were meant to remain inconspicuous in completing their task.
Harper had traded her usual bright orange camp shirt for a more discrete cropped black t-shirt and pleated pants. She had been insistent on coming up with a persona for them on the train ride from Montauk Station into New York City. They were meant to act as high school students researching for a World History paper on Ancient Greece. Now that they were inside the library, she had stopped her incessant rambling to peruse a riddle book, in what she had insisted was preparation for their job.
As they wandered through the bookshelves, she remained absorbed in the dog-eared children’s book, thumbing through the pages to find a riddle that would be fitting of a sphinx.
“Here’s one, Amon,” she said, narrowly avoiding a collision with another library patron as she read, “What is something that runs but never walks, has a mouth but never talks, has a head but never weeps, has a bed but never sleeps?”
The dark-haired son of Apollo glanced over from a shelf of dusty atlases, the corners of his mouth lifting slightly. “That is an easy one,” he replied simply. "River. Try me with something more challenging next time around." He adjusted the collar of his striped button down, which he had layered with a navy blue sweater in preparation for the chill of the air-conditioned interior.
“The real riddle is where we can find this sphinx,” Amon glanced around the spacious reading area, eyeing the dark wooden staircase with its ornate railings. “The boyfriend and girlfriend who tried this last time, they found her by a bookcase.”
“A bookcase,” Harper repeated derisively, closing her book to theatrically scan their surroundings. “That narrows it down.”
Ignoring Harper’s mockery, the son of Apollo paused suddenly, his dark eyes glazing over with concentration. His hearing dulled, the surrounding footsteps and rustling pages fading into the background as if muffled by a thick curtain. Amon searched for the energy signature of the monster he knew lurked among the mortals. It was a subtle shift, like trying to discern a whisper in a crowded room, but he felt a faint, abnormal energy hanging somewhere up above.
“I say we try the second floor,” he said as he snapped out of the tracking trance, offering no other explanation to Harper.
“We could do that, sure,” Harper said, words laced with blatant doubt at his sudden certainty. “I say we try asking the Visitor’s Center. I know she's supposed to be disguised by the Mist, but the librarians have to have noticed something.”
“You can go ahead and do that.” The small smirk from earlier was now spreading across his face. “But you can’t be upset if I find the sphinx and solve her riddle before you even get there.”
Harper rolled her eyes, but she made no attempt to stop Amon from walking towards the staircase. After a moment she set off after him, footsteps even against the wooden steps.
Up on the second floor, Amon moved quietly, his dark eyes scanning the hallway for anything out of the ordinary.
I know you’re up here.
He stopped at every heavy-looking mahogany door, peering through each muted glass insert. He felt the air grow thicker with ominous energy at every step, so he knew the monster must be near.
One of the doors was slightly ajar, a suspiciously open invitation. Or a trap. The dark-haired boy caught sight of a cat-shaped figure on the other side before ducking down and motioning sharply for Harper’s attention. He unsheathed his kopis from his belt, bracing himself for confrontation.
Harper crouched against the wall, hand on the hilt of her sword as she tried to peek through the frosted glass pane. She held her breath, ready to move at Amon’s signal. He held out three fingers and then put them down one by one. When he hit zero, they stood in unison, flinging the door open together.
When Amon and Harper stepped inside, the body of the sphinx lay motionless on the floor.
The rest of the room was in disarray, littered with disheveled chairs and broken bits of chalk. A window on the other side of the room had been forced open, the curtain fluttering in the wind.
“No way,” Harper said. The door clicked shut behind her as she pushed past Amon into the room and kneeled to study the monster’s limp figure.
The sphinx had the large body of a lion and the eerily human face of a middle-aged woman, hair tied back in a severe bun and foundation caked onto her high cheekbones. Fangs jutted out of her red-painted lips, and eagle wings sprouted out of the space between her shoulder blades, folded tight against her back.
“Monsters dissolve into dust when they die,” Amon remarked, keeping his distance as he watched the subtle rise and fall of the monster’s ribs. “She must have been knocked unconscious.”
“Right,” Harper agreed, “The real question is who. And why.”
She hovered a hand over the cat's shoulder, set on rousing her. Before she made contact, the sphinx's eyes snapped open, round irises surrounded by shocking yellow sclera.
"Slain!" she wailed. Harper staggered backwards. Amon’s arms instinctively reached out to catch her, but she didn’t stumble near enough to make contact. "I am slain!"
With feline grace, the sphinx rose to her feet. A white tape outline marked the placement of her previously prone body on the floor. The muscles in her legs rippled as she paced in front of Harper and Amon, massive velvet paws silent against the carpet.
"And you, my dear heroes," she roared, eyes narrowed in an accusatory glare, "were too late to save me!"
The sphinx sniffed, composing herself. She leapt onto a wooden table. The table legs creaked underneath her weight. "Fear not," she tutted, "Fear not. For you can still avenge me. If you are able to determine the murderer and their weapon, then I will obtain justice, and all will be right with the world.”
“Your riddle is a murder mystery,” Harper said, confusion written across her face. Amon raised an eyebrow. The sphinx chuffed, a low rumbling sound reminiscent of laughter.
“You sought that hackneyed question about man? The Sphinx that the storytellers remember is far less adaptive than I am. I am not interested in your ability to regurgitate the information you have read. Nor am I interested in taking advantage of the nonsensical rules of your English language.”
“I am here to satisfy my own curiosity: does modern mankind still possess the ability to engage in deductive reasoning, or do they only seek to make themselves appear intelligent? Do not speak,” the sphinx said, a pointed look at Harper, who had opened her mouth to interject, “You will answer my questions when you play my game.”
“The potential murder weapons are scattered throughout this room,” she continued, leaping off the table. “And the suspects have already provided their testimonies for your review. Rest assured, I have made certain that their statements contain no lies.”
A shimmering, translucent energy began to swirl around Harper and Amon’s feet, beginning to take shape as holograms with a flickering, ephemeral quality.
A projection of Cerberus materialized first, his three massive heads snarling and snapping in unison. A ribbon of text appeared by his paws to translate his growling: "I was guarding the entrance, my duty unbroken."
Next came the Minotaur, his towering form pacing within the labyrinth on Crete. He snorted and pawed at the ground, the holographic maze shifting behind him in the background. The translation text appeared: "Confined within these walls, no escape for me."
Lamia's projection flickered into view, her serpentine lower half coiled around her as she wept in her cave. She glanced mournfully at the holographic images of her lost children: "My grief consumes me, innocent of this crime."
A shimmering Hydra emerged next, its nine heads snapping at invisible foes. Each one moved independently, showcasing its ability to act on its own. The translation for the hissing head at the center read: "Engaged in battle, I could not have killed."
Typhon materialized with a thunderous roar, his colossal form fighting against restraints under Mount Etna. His immense size and power were palpable, even in scaled down holographic form: "Bound by chains of the earth, I could not have roamed free."
Echidna’s hologram appeared last, her form a mix of human and serpent, lounging in a dimly lit cave. She looked directly at the viewers, her expression both defiant and amused. The translation text by her side read: “I dwell in my lair, uninvolved in such petty affairs.”
The sphinx swiped at the last projection as it faded, deeming her handiwork satisfactory. “There is not enough information to deduce the killer using evidence alone. Because I am fair, I will provide you with three hints before your final guess. Be forewarned: if you fail to provide a correct answer, you will both perish. Is this understood?”
Harper spoke. “If we answer correctly, you will leave this library for good.”
“If you answer correctly, I will permanently relocate. It is a preferable option in comparison to another death. Now, do you agree to the terms and conditions?” the sphinx said primly, regarding Harper and Amon with casual disdain. The pair nodded. “Very well.”
The sphinx dropped onto the floor and let her head loll back, pretending to be dead once more.
Hint #1

Suspects	Weapons
Cerberus	The Shirt of Nessus
The Minotaur	Siren Song
Lamia	Harpy Talon
The Hydra	Celestial Bronze Sword
Typhon	A-C Encyclopedia
Echidna	Cerberus Fang

Soon after the sphinx had laid back down, Harper and Amon began to scour the room. A small pile of prospective murder weapons formed on a nearby table.
“We can easily eliminate the siren song,” Amon rushed to speak over Harper, eyeing the small glass vial of swirling gray matter that they had found nestled behind a row of books on metalworking. “It is a luring mechanism, not a murder weapon.”
“We could rule out Cerberus’ fang too,” he pointed at the enormous yellowing tooth, about the size of the small baseball bat Amon used to have when he played in the little league. “If we take the hologram as ground truth, all of his teeth were intact there.”
Harper used her kopis to prod at the stained tunic that had been hidden in a desk drawer, being careful not to touch it with bare skin. “The Shirt of Nessus is a viable option. It would be easy for any of the suspects to lay it down and wait for the hydra venom to kick in.”
“I am not ready to rule out the bronze sword either,” Amon noted. “Monsters have access to heroes and the weapons they leave behind.”
“Most of these monsters don’t even have opposable thumbs,” Harper argued, running a hand over the sword they had found by a power outlet. ”They don’t have the dexterity to wield a sword.”
“I do not imagine that the technicality would be that granular.”
Harper laughed. “Oh, the number of teeth in the Cerberus hologram tell all, but we’re drawing the line at opposable thumbs.”
“I suppose that that logic would also rule out the harpy talon and the encyclopedia easily as well,” Amon admitted. “Which would be too easy.”
“I’m just that good at logical deduction.” Harper said proudly. “If my assumption is correct, then the poisoned shirt is the only one that makes sense.”
Amon scoffed, folding his arms across his chest as his dark eyes bored into Harper. “It would not necessarily matter what our first guess would be anyway.”
“Can you provide an argument for any other weapon? Or are you intent on purposely making an illogical guess?” she countered cooly.
“Fine,” Amon acquiesced. “Since you are so adamant about the shirt, we can guess the shirt, and be incorrect. It does not matter. What about the suspects themselves?” He clasped his hands behind his back, his steps measured as he started to pace across the plush red carpet of the room.
Harper smiled, smugly accepting her victory. She strode towards a chalkboard at the side of the study room, inscribing the list of weapons and suspects with a fresh piece of white chalk.
“All of them have alibis,“ she began. “I think that-”
“Some make more sense than others,” Amon spoke over Harper, irritated by her minor triumph. “Cerberus, for example, is under the service of Hades. He says he did not leave his post, and he could not have done so without permission or dire consequences on the process of the dead.”
Harper silently seethed as Amon spoke, meeting his rationale with reluctant acceptance before starting again in a louder, exaggerated tone. “I think that the ones with the shakiest alibis are Lamia, the Minotaur, Typhon, and Echidna. No witnesses can confirm their locations. In fact, Lamia provides no location at all.” Harper circled those names. She looked at Amon with a forced smile, allowing him a moment to provide more commentary.
“Lamia? Well,” there was a hint of mockery in the sneer that tugged on the corner of Amon’s lips. “I would imagine her emotions rendered her… Too fragile and unstable to carry out such an act.”
“You’re kidding,” Harper scoffed, searching Amon's face for the slightest hint that he was joking. “Her grief is what moved her to kill children in the first place. I doubt it would suddenly be incapacitating. She’s just appealing to your sense of superiority, and I can’t believe that you’re falling for it.”
"It is not about superiority. It is about logic," Amon retorted, bristling in defense. “You cannot deny that emotions cloud judgment. Maybe the sphinx wants us to leverage our knowledge about her past crimes to reason that she was not thinking clearly in this case either.” Amon had no other evidence that pointed towards Lamia as the top suspect, but he had dug deep enough where he was now ready to stand firm in his reasoning.
“Murder,” Harper countered, eyes narrowed in a venomous stare, “-does not require you to think clearly. Haven’t you heard of a crime of passion? If anyone’s judgment is clouded right now, Amon, it’s yours.”
The son of Apollo squared his shoulders, his expression hardening. "I understand the concept of crimes of passion, thank you.” His dark-eyed stare returned Harper's gaze, unflinching at the intensity. “But our investigation must be rooted in facts, not assumptions based on emotions. And the facts are,” he resumed his pacing once more, “that Lamia cannot be the culprit, as she is the only suspect that openly admits to being innocent of this crime.”
Amon had considered this from the very start, but provoking Harper like this had proved to be far more amusing.
Harper crossed Lamia’s name off of the board. She swallowed down her anger, fighting the urge to continue pressing the issue in favor of returning to their list of suspects. She pointed her piece of chalk at the next names on the list. “The Minotaur and Typhon are trapped, or so they say. How could they have done anything?”
“Their alibis revolve around their inability to escape,” Amon pointed out. “Not that they were unable to commit murder. The Labyrinth, in fact,” he raised a dramatic finger, “has several moving passages that could have permitted the Minotaur to move and commit murder without an official escape.”
Harper considered his words for a long moment, trying to find the flaw in his reasoning. Seeing none, she placed a dot next to the Minotaurs's name.
“Typhon escaped his prison in the Second Titanomachy. He could do it again,” Harper said thoughtfully. “Though I don’t understand why he would do something like this. He’s the Sphinx's father. The same goes for Echidna.”
Amon, who had been nodding at Harper’s assessment of Typhon’s abilities, pursed his lips at her observation of parentage. “I do not see how this could possibly be relevant to the logical puzzle at hand.”
Harper spoke slowly, as if the answer was obvious. “What motive would they have to kill their own daughter?”
“Harper,” Amon began curtly, folding his arms across his chest. “Half of the Greek myths revolve around immortals killing their own children.”
“Then we should pick one of them,” Harper declared, pivoting her argument instead of admitting her logical blunder. “They would have more of a motive than the rest of the suspects, if anything.”
“The Minotaur can escape much more easily than Typhon can. Motive aside, it is the most logical guess,” Amon concluded, adjusting his collar haughtily. “I will remind you that we picked your choice of weapon. It is only fair that I select the monster.”
“Fine.” Harper agreed, her gaze stormy as she turned back towards the sphinx. “We accuse the Minotaur of killing the sphinx with the Shirt of Nessus.”
The sphinx opened one eye. “None of these are correct!”
Hint #2

Suspects	Weapons
Cerberus	The Shirt of Nessus
The Minotaur	Siren Song
Lamia	Harpy Talon
The Hydra	Celestial Bronze Sword
Typhon	A-C Encyclopedia
Echidna	Cerberus Fang

“Two more hints left.” Harper announced, crossing off the Minotaur’s name and the poisoned shirt on the chalkboard with a flourish. It was not ideal that her initial logical deductions had been incorrect, but at least Amon had also been wrong. She couldn't resist a snide comment. “I knew it wasn’t the Minotaur.”
“So you still think it’s Typhon.” Choosing to ignore Harper’s taunting, Amon rested his hand on a nearby desk, studying the lists on the chalkboard before him. He had taken the Minotaur error as a personal failure, and was determined to get the suspect right this time.
“I do.”
“Why not Echidna?”
“She’s too emotional to kill someone, obviously.” Harper said sarcastically. “Her frail female arms are probably too weak to even hold a weapon.”
The dark-haired boy rolled his eyes. “Objectively,” he began, ignoring her quip once more, “Typhon could not have lied about his inability to roam free. A natural disaster freed him from Mount Etna during the Second Titanomachy, but he could not recreate those conditions on his own.” Though his tone remained aloof, it was clear that Amon was relishing in the opportunity to flaunt his mythology knowledge.
“Maybe,” Harper argued, stubborn. “But Echidna’s statement was less ambiguous than his. Typhon just explains his predicament; he doesn't provide a real claim. Echidna explicitly says she was not involved.” She thought for a few more moments, rolling the piece of chalk in her hands. “Echidna could have released him? They would be accomplices.”
Amon shook his head. “There was a single murderer. Not two. The sphinx would not lie about the premise of the game.”
Harper stared at him coldly, but could offer no rebuttal. She turned her attention to the board. “Typhon is a giant. He’s capable of using the sword.”
“But the specificity of Echidna’s denial is still incredibly suspicious. ‘Petty affairs’ is a strange way to phrase a murder. But,” Amon added reluctantly, “I understand the logic behind Typhon. I suppose it is your turn to choose the monster, and we will still have another guess to work with.”
“As for the weapon,” he continued, “I still think the sword is the most viable option, given that the siren song and the fang can be ruled out and the shirt with the venom was, well,” Amon pursed his lips, fighting the urge to smile, “incorrect.”
Before Harper could interject, Amon turned towards the sphinx at the front of the room. “We accuse Typhon of killing the sphinx with a Celestial Bronze Sword.”
“One of these is correct!”
Hint #3

Suspects	Weapons
Cerberus	The Shirt of Nessus
The Minotaur	Siren Song
Lamia	Harpy Talon
The Hydra	Celestial Bronze Sword
Typhon	A-C Encyclopedia
Echidna	Cerberus Fang

“Aha!” Amon raised a triumphant finger before pointing it at Harper. “I told you,” he gloated, “Typhon had no escape route.”
“You were right,” Harper admitted, staring down at the carpet so that she would not have to look at his smug expression.
“Let’s get this over with,” she muttered, and turned back towards the lioness with crossed arms. “We accuse Echidna of killing the sphinx with a Celestial Bronze Sword”
“One of these is correct,” the sphinx announced. Her mouth twisted in amusement, fangs bared in a menacing smile.
READ PART 2 HERE

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ASSESSMENTS I CAN COMPLETE:

• Online Courses (1 - 20 Weeks Long)
• Homework Assignments
• Exams Quizzes Tests
• Excel Projects
• Discussion Forum Posts
• Research Papers Term Papers Essays
• Employment Assessments

MY MATH SUBJECTS OF EXPERTISE:
I am very knowledgeable and proficient in assisting students in a wide range of mathematics classes. I can help students complete their homework assignments and other projects get an A on quizzes, tests, and exams (including proctored assessments) answer online discussion posts write essays & papers in MLA APA Chicago format and provide general overall academic help in each math course listed below:

• Advanced Placement Honors High School Level Math
• AP Calculus AB A.P. Calculus BC
• AP Statistics
• Biostatistics Bio-Statistics
• College Algebra Intermediate Algebra
• Business Calculus
• Business Statistics
• Business Math
• Calculus I Calculus II Calculus III (Calc)
• Geometry
• International Baccalaureate (IB) Maths
• Liberal Arts Math
• Logic & Reasoning
• Multivariable Calculus Multi variable Calculus
• Precalculus Pre-calculus
• Probability & Statistics
• Psychology Statistics Psych Stats
• Quantitative Reasoning Quantitative Methods Quantitative Literacy (Quant)
• Statistics (Stats)
• Statistics for Social Sciences
• Trigonometry (Trig)

STATISTICS HELP (MY BEST SUBJECT):

• I have a master's degree in Applied Statistics from a university in New Jersey, USA. As a result, I am very proficient in helping students with various types of Statistics courses including Biostatistics Business Statistics Elementary Statistics Probability & Statistics Psychology Statistics.
• I have extensive knowledge and skill with helping students get through various statistical concepts including all of the following in alphabetical order:
• ANOVA Bar Graph, Boxplot, Dot Plot, Histogram, Pie Chart Bias Binomial, Exponential, Poisson, Gamma, Uniform Distribution Central Limit Theorem Chi-Square Test Coefficient of Determination (R^2) Conditional & Relative Probability Confidence Interval Correlation Coefficient (r) Critical Region Critical Value Descriptive & Inferential Statistics Effect Size Expected Value Experiment vs Observation Goodness of Fit Test Hypothesis Testing Interpolation & Extrapolation Interquartile Range (IQR) Kurtosis Left, Negative, Right, Positive Skewed Distribution Logistic Regression Mean, Median, Mode, Midrange Multiple Regression Nominal, Ordinal, Interval, Ratio I Population Parameter Normal, Symmetric & Bell Shaped Distribution Null & Alternate Hypothesis One & Two Sample T-Test One & Two Sample Z-Test Ordinary Least Squares Outliers P-Value Pooled Variance (Equal Variances) Proportion R^2 Range Regression Regression Line Reject & Fail to Reject Ho Relative & Cumulative Frequency Distributions Relativity & Reliability Right, Left, One, Two Tailed Tailed Hypothesis Test Sample Statistics Sampling Methods (Convenience, Stratified, Simple, Cluster, Systematic) Significance Level (1%, 5%, 10%) Skewness Standard Deviation& Variance T-Score Test Statistic Time Series Type I & Type II Errors Unbiased Estimators Z-Score

ALGEBRA HELP:

• I am well-versed in helping students do well in Algebra 1 & 2 College Algebra Intermediate Algebra Pre-Algebra and I am very knowledgeable and proficient in the following algebra topics in alphabetical order:
• Absolute Values Circle Equation Domain Exponents Graphing Horizontal & Vertical Asymptotes Inequalities, Equations & Functions Inverse Functions Linear, Exponential, Logarithmic, Quadratic Equations Logarithms Maximum & Minimum Values of a Graph Number Lines One-to-One Functions Parallel & Perpendicular Lines Plotting Points & Ordered Pairs Point-Slope Form Polynomial Division Polynomials Radicals Range Rational & Irrational Expressions Rational Functions Real Roots Real Zeros Relations & Functions Slope Slope-Intercept Form Square Roots Standard Form of a Line System of Equations System of Inequalities Variables X and Y Intercepts

CALCULUS HELP:

• I am well-versed in helping students do well in Calculus I, II & III, Calculus 1, 2 & 3, Business Calculus, Multivariable Calculus, Vector Calculus and I am very knowledgeable and proficient in the following calculus topics in alphabetical order:
• Absolute & Local Maximum and Minimum Antiderivative Area & Volume Chain Rule Concavity Continuity Convergence Test Critical Points Curvature Curve of Rotation Curve Sketching Derivatives Divergence Test First & Second Derivative Test Fourier Series Implicit Differentiation Increasing / Decreasing Functions Infinite Series Integrals Integration by Parts Jacobian Matrix Limits L’Hopital’s Rule Maclaurin Series Mean Value Theorem Partial Derivative Product & Quotient Rule Reiman Sum Related Rates Simpson’s Rule Solid of Revolution Substitution Rule Taylor Series

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ATTRIBUTES THAT SET ME APART FROM OTHER TUTORS:

• I firmly believe that I have many attributes and skills that set me apart from other tutors. Below is a list of qualities that makes me an ideal fit to help you master your coursework:

I CAN AID STUDENTS TAKING PROCTORED ASSESSMENTS:

• Proficient in CollegeBoard AP Calculus AB, AP Calculus BC & AP Statistics exams.
• Skilled with International Baccalaureate Math Exams: IB Maths HL & IB Maths SL
• Can intentionally answer a few problems incorrectly at the student's request.
• Can text solutions to the student while they are taking a proctored exam.
• Upon request, can purposely obtain grades below an A (ex: B+, B, C+, C-).
• I can stretch out the time to a plausible length for timed exams and assignments before submitting them.
• Have reliable software that can change my IP address to match the closest major city near the student.
• I have exceptional multiple-choice exam-taking skills. I have mastered the various techniques to make calculated guesses for the correct option in standardized exams such as the SAT & GRE.

I CAN VERIFY MY ACADEMIC KNOWLEDGE & SKILLS:

• I have no problem with requests to solve sample problems upfront to prove my knowledge & proficiency of the course concepts.
• I can provide glowing references & strong examples of work done for past clients to verify my academic skills.
• I can also provide, upon request, complete detailed calculations with explanations for solutions to the problems worked on.
• I am quite skilled and adept in using multiple modernized educational platforms and software, including but not limited to: Brightspace MyStatLab D2L WebAssign Canvas MyMathLab Blackboard ALEKS
• Can format term papers and discussion posts in APA MLA Harvard Chicago Vancouver OSCOLA IEEE format.

I HAVE PAID ACCESS TO OVER 15 STUDY-HELP WEBSITES AND MATHEMATICAL SOFTWARE:

• I have multiple paid subscriptions to a wide range of academic tutoring resources, including Chegg, Quizlet, CourseHero, Brainly, Grammarly, Study. com, Bartleby, Slader, Transtutors, Slideshare, StudocU, Turnitin, Academia, SymboLab, WolframAlpha, and Scribd to help guide to solve exam & homework questions that I may not immediately know.
• However, I am smart enough not to blatantly plagiarize solutions online but instead write them in my own unique words, formatting, & mathematical terminology.
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MY AVAILABILITY & RELIABILITY:

• Depending on my availability, I can accommodate immediate tutoring requests, 1-24 hour, and 1-30-day deadlines.
• I can schedule live real-time online sessions and meet deadlines in an impressively timely fashion.
• I can provide quick notifications and updates of progress made in the student's class via email text phone calls.
• I can also be available to tutor students for Fall 2021 Spring 2022 Summer 2022 semesters.

MY EDUCATIONAL SOFTWARE OF EXPERTISE:

• I am very knowledgeable and well-versed in a wide range of educational software to tutor students in including but not limited to: Acellus ALEKS APEX Learning Aplia Blackboard Brightspace Canvas Cengage CengageNow Connect ConnectMath Connexus CPM D2L Discord Edmentum Eviews Examity Excel Hawkes Learning Honorlock Khan Academy Knewton LimeSpring Lumen Maple MasteringChemistry MasteringPhysics MathXL (XL) MATLAB McGraw-Hill Microsoft Word Minitab Moodle MyAccountingLab MyEconLab MyITLab MyLab My Lab MyMathLab My Math Lab MyOpenMath MyPsychLab MySocLab MyStatLab My Stat Lab NCSS Open Source Software Pearson PERT PlatoWeb PowerPoint Prezi R Respondus Lockdown Browser with Webcam Sapling SPSS Stata StraighterLine Straighter Line WebAssign Web Assign Webex (Cisco) WebWork Wiley WileyPlus Wonderlic Zoom

SCHOOLS FROM WHICH I'VE HELPED STUDENTS IN :
As of 2021, I have tutored and helped students enrolled at the following U.S. universities community colleges county & city colleges schools for-profit institutions listed below in alphabetical order:

• A - C: American Public University System (APUS) Arizona State Ashford Brigham Young Brown Broward California State (Fullerton) Capella Chamberlain (Illinois) Colorado Technical Columbia Columbia Southern Cornell
• D - K: Dallas College Dartmouth DeVry Excelsior College Florida International Florida State Full Sail Georgia State Grand Canyon Harvard Houston Community College Ivy Tech Community College Kaplan Kennesaw State Kent State
• L - T: Liberty Lone Star College System Kaplan Miami Dade Michigan State CUNY State University of New York (SUNY) Northern Virginia Ohio State University of Phoenix (UOP) Penn State Princeton Purdue (Davenport) San Diego State San Francisco State San Jose State Southern New Hampshire Southern Nevada Stanford St. Petersburg Strayer Texas Tech
• UNIVERSITY OF: Alabama Arizona California (UC) Central Florida Chicago Cincinnati Florida Houston Illinois (Urbana-Champaign) Iowa Maryland Minnesota Michigan North Texas Pennsylvania Southern Florida Texas Toronto
• U - Z: UCLA Extension Utah State Utah Valley Valencia Walden U Wake Technical Western Governors Wilmington Yale

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I OFFER FLEXIBLE PAYMENT PLANS:

• I offer several unique payment plans, including a weekly plan, a discounted monthly plan, a discounted half-now / half-later plan, and highly discounted up-front rates.
• I can accept the following payment methods for my services: PayPal Debit Cards Square Cash Credit Cards Cash App Venmo.
• Only people located in North America have access to Venmo Cash App Zelle.
• This is an excellent way to determine if the person you're dealing with is from the United States.
• Within reason, I offer a partial or full money-Back guarantee if the student is very unsatisfied with my academic services.

TUTORING AVAILABLE FOR OTHER SUBJECTS:

• For other subjects, you can reach out to me, and I can connect you with one of my tutoring partners who can provide general academic assistance for the following subjects:
• Art & Design: Art History Design Film Studies
• Business: Accounting (Acc) Biz Courses Business Administration (Biz Admn) Business Calculus Business Law Business Statistics Corporate Finance Economics (Econ) Finance (Fin) Financial Accounting Intermediate Accounting Intermediate Microeconomics (Micro) Macroeconomics (Macro) Management (Mgmt) Managerial Accounting Marketing MBA
• Computer Science: C C++ Computer Programming (Comp) Java Python R (Introduction & Intermediate Level Only)
• Humanities: Communications (Comm) English Literature Essay & Term Paper Writing, Editing, Proofreading Essays History Papers Philosophy (Phil) Religious Studies Theology (Theo)
• Mathematics: A.P. Calculus AB & BC Psychology Statistics AP Statistics Bio statistics Calculus I (1) Calculus II (2) Calculus III (3) College Algebra Differential Equations Discrete Math Finite Math Functions General Math Geometry Liberal Arts Math Linear Algebra Multi-variable Calculus Partial Differential Equations Precalculus Probability Quantitative Reasoning Real Analysis Statistics Trigonometry (Trig) Vector Calculus
• Science & Medicine: Anatomy & Physiology (A & P) Biochemistry Biology (Bio) Biostatistics Earth Science Environmental Science General Chemistry (Chem) Healthcare Medicine Nursing Nutrition Organic Chemistry Physics (Phys)
• Social Sciences: Anthropology Economics (Econ) Geology Law & Justice Liberal Arts Liberal Studies Political Science Psychology Sociology

THE OBLIGATORY "IS THIS A SCAM?" QUESTION:
Considering the fact that you found my contact information online, it’s understandable to be skeptical regarding the legitimacy of my services. Therefore, I’m willing to do all of the following to help you feel more secure in trusting me with your academic needs:

• 1) Speak with you on the phone and answer any questions you may have so that you have the opportunity to assess and analyze my tone, articulation, accent, diction, dialect, regionalisms, pitch, vocabulary, word choice, intonations, and inflections.
• NOTE: I’m a New Jersey-born Irish/Italian-American, but I have been told that I speak in an erudite & articulate suburban American accent with a “professor style” voice somewhat resembling the voice of actor: Ben Stein.
• 2) Agree to do some homework questions of yours upfront with the work fully shown in real-time to prove my mastery of the course content.
• 3) Send you screenshots of at least five past scores I attained from completing exams & homework assignments for other students in the same type of class you need help with.
• 4) Send you full screenshots of written exam solutions I wrote up by hand for students in the past in the same course that you need help with so that you can see my neat handwriting.
• 5) Provide you with the contact information of students who have utilized my services in the past who would be more than willing to vouch for my skills.

MY REBUTTAL TO THE OBLIGATORY “IS THIS A SCAM?” QUESTION:
At the risk of sounding arrogant, I consider myself to be at least marginally more intelligent (both academically & socially) than the average person. Therefore, if I ever decided to suddenly risk prison time, risk my reputation, and risk enduring the wrath of modern-day “cancel culture” by scamming people out of their money:

• I certainly wouldn’t do it for such paltry amounts of money. (i.e., anything less than $1,000 per victim.)
• I certainly wouldn’t choose high school & college students as my “target audience” to scam, considering that most people without college degrees have abysmally low annual incomes. Why choose low-income victims when it would be much more profitable to target high-income, high-net-worth individuals earning at least six figures a year? I have knowledge in business consulting, and I promise you that a business owner would be a MUCH more lucrative mark than a low-income college student.
• I wouldn’t choose such a time & energy-draining method of scamming people. Also, communicating back and forth with potential clients is an absurdly long time sink since only less than 10% of all potential clients who reach out to me actually become paying clients of mine. This means that 90% of my time communicating with potential clients ultimately proves to be a colossal waste of my irretrievable time & energy.
• If you pay me to provide academic services and I don’t deliver, you can always dispute the payment with the payment app and easily get your money refunded. If I were in the habit of swindling money from people, then all of my payment accounts would have been investigated and be completely shut down by now. And I would have been permanently banned from opening new accounts. Therefore, the fact that all my payment apps have been fully active for years should be sufficient proof that I haven’t had people consistently disputing payments sent to me.

HOW TO CONTACT ME:
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• I take my work as a tutor very seriously, and I always aim to do my best to help my students excel in school. I have a solid and sincere passion for academic achievement, and with my help, I am positive that I can help students obtain very high grades with minimal stress and effort.
• Please feel free to contact me if you're interested in my services and would like to learn more. I'm available 24/7 via phone call, email, and text. Again, thank you for taking the time to read my Reddit tutoring ad, and I hope to hear from you soon!

My contact details:
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Call: +1 727 456 9641
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MY CONTACT INFO:
WhatsApp: +1 (213) 594-5657
Call: +1 727 456 9641
Website: hiraedu. com
Email: [info@hiraedu](mailto:info@hiraedu). com
ASSESSMENTS I CAN COMPLETE:

• Online Courses (1 - 20 Weeks Long)
• Homework Assignments
• Exams Quizzes Tests
• Excel Projects
• Discussion Forum Posts
• Research Papers Term Papers Essays
• Employment Assessments

MY MATH SUBJECTS OF EXPERTISE:
I am very knowledgeable and proficient in assisting students in a wide range of mathematics classes. I can help students complete their homework assignments and other projects get an A on quizzes, tests, and exams (including proctored assessments) answer online discussion posts write essays & papers in MLA APA Chicago format and provide general overall academic help in each math course listed below:

• Advanced Placement Honors High School Level Math
• AP Calculus AB A.P. Calculus BC
• AP Statistics
• Biostatistics Bio-Statistics
• College Algebra Intermediate Algebra
• Business Calculus
• Business Statistics
• Business Math
• Calculus I Calculus II Calculus III (Calc)
• Geometry
• International Baccalaureate (IB) Maths
• Liberal Arts Math
• Logic & Reasoning
• Multivariable Calculus Multi variable Calculus
• Precalculus Pre-calculus
• Probability & Statistics
• Psychology Statistics Psych Stats
• Quantitative Reasoning Quantitative Methods Quantitative Literacy (Quant)
• Statistics (Stats)
• Statistics for Social Sciences
• Trigonometry (Trig)

STATISTICS HELP (MY BEST SUBJECT):

• I have a master's degree in Applied Statistics from a university in New Jersey, USA. As a result, I am very proficient in helping students with various types of Statistics courses including Biostatistics Business Statistics Elementary Statistics Probability & Statistics Psychology Statistics.
• I have extensive knowledge and skill with helping students get through various statistical concepts including all of the following in alphabetical order:
• ANOVA Bar Graph, Boxplot, Dot Plot, Histogram, Pie Chart Bias Binomial, Exponential, Poisson, Gamma, Uniform Distribution Central Limit Theorem Chi-Square Test Coefficient of Determination (R^2) Conditional & Relative Probability Confidence Interval Correlation Coefficient (r) Critical Region Critical Value Descriptive & Inferential Statistics Effect Size Expected Value Experiment vs Observation Goodness of Fit Test Hypothesis Testing Interpolation & Extrapolation Interquartile Range (IQR) Kurtosis Left, Negative, Right, Positive Skewed Distribution Logistic Regression Mean, Median, Mode, Midrange Multiple Regression Nominal, Ordinal, Interval, Ratio I Population Parameter Normal, Symmetric & Bell Shaped Distribution Null & Alternate Hypothesis One & Two Sample T-Test One & Two Sample Z-Test Ordinary Least Squares Outliers P-Value Pooled Variance (Equal Variances) Proportion R^2 Range Regression Regression Line Reject & Fail to Reject Ho Relative & Cumulative Frequency Distributions Relativity & Reliability Right, Left, One, Two Tailed Tailed Hypothesis Test Sample Statistics Sampling Methods (Convenience, Stratified, Simple, Cluster, Systematic) Significance Level (1%, 5%, 10%) Skewness Standard Deviation& Variance T-Score Test Statistic Time Series Type I & Type II Errors Unbiased Estimators Z-Score

ALGEBRA HELP:

• I am well-versed in helping students do well in Algebra 1 & 2 College Algebra Intermediate Algebra Pre-Algebra and I am very knowledgeable and proficient in the following algebra topics in alphabetical order:
• Absolute Values Circle Equation Domain Exponents Graphing Horizontal & Vertical Asymptotes Inequalities, Equations & Functions Inverse Functions Linear, Exponential, Logarithmic, Quadratic Equations Logarithms Maximum & Minimum Values of a Graph Number Lines One-to-One Functions Parallel & Perpendicular Lines Plotting Points & Ordered Pairs Point-Slope Form Polynomial Division Polynomials Radicals Range Rational & Irrational Expressions Rational Functions Real Roots Real Zeros Relations & Functions Slope Slope-Intercept Form Square Roots Standard Form of a Line System of Equations System of Inequalities Variables X and Y Intercepts

CALCULUS HELP:

• I am well-versed in helping students do well in Calculus I, II & III, Calculus 1, 2 & 3, Business Calculus, Multivariable Calculus, Vector Calculus and I am very knowledgeable and proficient in the following calculus topics in alphabetical order:
• Absolute & Local Maximum and Minimum Antiderivative Area & Volume Chain Rule Concavity Continuity Convergence Test Critical Points Curvature Curve of Rotation Curve Sketching Derivatives Divergence Test First & Second Derivative Test Fourier Series Implicit Differentiation Increasing / Decreasing Functions Infinite Series Integrals Integration by Parts Jacobian Matrix Limits L’Hopital’s Rule Maclaurin Series Mean Value Theorem Partial Derivative Product & Quotient Rule Reiman Sum Related Rates Simpson’s Rule Solid of Revolution Substitution Rule Taylor Series

ATTRIBUTES THAT SET ME APART FROM OTHER TUTORS:

• I firmly believe that I have many attributes and skills that set me apart from other tutors. Below is a list of qualities that makes me an ideal fit to help you master your coursework:

I CAN AID STUDENTS TAKING PROCTORED ASSESSMENTS:

• Proficient in CollegeBoard AP Calculus AB, AP Calculus BC & AP Statistics exams.
• Skilled with International Baccalaureate Math Exams: IB Maths HL & IB Maths SL
• Can intentionally answer a few problems incorrectly at the student's request.
• Can text solutions to the student while they are taking a proctored exam.
• Upon request, can purposely obtain grades below an A (ex: B+, B, C+, C-).
• I can stretch out the time to a plausible length for timed exams and assignments before submitting them.
• Have reliable software that can change my IP address to match the closest major city near the student.
• I have exceptional multiple-choice exam-taking skills. I have mastered the various techniques to make calculated guesses for the correct option in standardized exams such as the SAT & GRE.

I CAN VERIFY MY ACADEMIC KNOWLEDGE & SKILLS:

• I have no problem with requests to solve sample problems upfront to prove my knowledge & proficiency of the course concepts.
• I can provide glowing references & strong examples of work done for past clients to verify my academic skills.
• I can also provide, upon request, complete detailed calculations with explanations for solutions to the problems worked on.
• I am quite skilled and adept in using multiple modernized educational platforms and software, including but not limited to: Brightspace MyStatLab D2L WebAssign Canvas MyMathLab Blackboard ALEKS
• Can format term papers and discussion posts in APA MLA Harvard Chicago Vancouver OSCOLA IEEE format.

I HAVE PAID ACCESS TO OVER 15 STUDY-HELP WEBSITES AND MATHEMATICAL SOFTWARE:

• I have multiple paid subscriptions to a wide range of academic tutoring resources, including Chegg, Quizlet, CourseHero, Brainly, Grammarly, Study. com, Bartleby, Slader, Transtutors, Slideshare, StudocU, Turnitin, Academia, SymboLab, WolframAlpha, and Scribd to help guide to solve exam & homework questions that I may not immediately know.
• However, I am smart enough not to blatantly plagiarize solutions online but instead write them in my own unique words, formatting, & mathematical terminology.
• I have access to a very sophisticated graphing calculator and various mathematical software that provides step-by-step solutions to complex mathematical problems within seconds, allowing me to provide exact solutions to the student in a timely manner.
• I have impeccable handwriting and a high-quality mobile scanner app that allows me to scan written solutions in very legible high-definition JPG, PNG, or PDF formats.

I ALWAYS ACCEPT CALLS:

• I have no problem speaking with potential clients on the phone.
• I have an authentic suburban upper-middle-class American accent, similar to the actor: Ben Stein.
• However, be wary of so-called “tutors” who refuse to accept any phone calls or have a strict “text / email only” policy.
• These “text-only” / “email-only” tutors are usually located outside the U.S. and are afraid their foreign accent will expose their true nationality.

I WRITE LIKE A PROFESSIONAL:

• Approximately 98% of the time, I write all my texts & emails in grammatically correct U.S. English with proper punctuation and occasional typo.
• Unlike some alleged “U.S.-based tutors,” I do NOT write using broken English or grammatically incorrect texting shorthand (example: "wut u need help wit??").
• I write my ad in proper American English, the same way I always text and email people.
• I can guide students on formatting & writing term papers, essays, and discussion posts in APA MLA Chicago Harvard format.
• If the tutor you’re checking out consistently writes using egregiously horrendous grammar, do you honestly think it’s a good idea to trust them to help you do well in your class?

MY EDUCATIONAL SOFTWARE OF EXPERTISE:

• I am very knowledgeable and well-versed in a wide range of educational software to tutor students in including but not limited to: Acellus ALEKS APEX Learning Aplia Blackboard Brightspace Canvas Cengage CengageNow Connect ConnectMath Connexus CPM D2L Discord Edmentum Eviews Examity Excel Hawkes Learning Honorlock Khan Academy Knewton LimeSpring Lumen Maple MasteringChemistry MasteringPhysics MathXL (XL) MATLAB McGraw-Hill Microsoft Word Minitab Moodle MyAccountingLab MyEconLab MyITLab MyLab My Lab MyMathLab My Math Lab MyOpenMath MyPsychLab MySocLab MyStatLab My Stat Lab NCSS Open Source Software Pearson PERT PlatoWeb PowerPoint Prezi R Respondus Lockdown Browser with Webcam Sapling SPSS Stata StraighterLine Straighter Line WebAssign Web Assign Webex (Cisco) WebWork Wiley WileyPlus Wonderlic Zoom

SCHOOLS FROM WHICH I'VE HELPED STUDENTS IN :
As of 2021, I have tutored and helped students enrolled at the following U.S. universities community colleges county & city colleges schools for-profit institutions listed below in alphabetical order:

• A - C: American Public University System (APUS) Arizona State Ashford Brigham Young Brown Broward California State (Fullerton) Capella Chamberlain (Illinois) Colorado Technical Columbia Columbia Southern Cornell
• D - K: Dallas College Dartmouth DeVry Excelsior College Florida International Florida State Full Sail Georgia State Grand Canyon Harvard Houston Community College Ivy Tech Community College Kaplan Kennesaw State Kent State
• L - T: Liberty Lone Star College System Kaplan Miami Dade Michigan State CUNY State University of New York (SUNY) Northern Virginia Ohio State University of Phoenix (UOP) Penn State Princeton Purdue (Davenport) San Diego State San Francisco State San Jose State Southern New Hampshire Southern Nevada Stanford St. Petersburg Strayer Texas Tech
• UNIVERSITY OF: Alabama Arizona California (UC) Central Florida Chicago Cincinnati Florida Houston Illinois (Urbana-Champaign) Iowa Maryland Minnesota Michigan North Texas Pennsylvania Southern Florida Texas Toronto
• U - Z: UCLA Extension Utah State Utah Valley Valencia Walden U Wake Technical Western Governors Wilmington Yale

I OFFER FLEXIBLE PAYMENT PLANS:

• I offer several unique payment plans, including a weekly plan, a discounted monthly plan, a discounted half-now / half-later plan, and highly discounted up-front rates.
• I can accept the following payment methods for my services: PayPal Debit Cards Square Cash Credit Cards Cash App Venmo.
• Only people located in North America have access to Venmo Cash App Zelle.
• This is an excellent way to determine if the person you're dealing with is from the United States.
• Within reason, I offer a partial or full money-Back guarantee if the student is very unsatisfied with my academic services.

HELP AVAILABLE FOR OTHER SUBJECTS:

• For other subjects, you can reach out to me, and I can connect you with one of my tutoring partners who can provide general academic assistance for the following subjects:
• Art & Design: Art History Design Film Studies
• Business: Accounting (Acc) Biz Courses Business Administration (Biz Admn) Business Calculus Business Law Business Statistics Corporate Finance Economics (Econ) Finance (Fin) Financial Accounting Intermediate Accounting Intermediate Microeconomics (Micro) Macroeconomics (Macro) Management (Mgmt) Managerial Accounting Marketing MBA
• Computer Science: C C++ Computer Programming (Comp) Java Python R (Introduction & Intermediate Level Only)
• Humanities: Communications (Comm) English Literature Essay & Term Paper Writing, Editing, Proofreading Essays History Papers Philosophy (Phil) Religious Studies Theology (Theo)
• Mathematics: A.P. Calculus AB & BC Psychology Statistics AP Statistics Bio statistics Calculus I (1) Calculus II (2) Calculus III (3) College Algebra Differential Equations Discrete Math Finite Math Functions General Math Geometry Liberal Arts Math Linear Algebra Multi-variable Calculus Partial Differential Equations Precalculus Probability Quantitative Reasoning Real Analysis Statistics Trigonometry (Trig) Vector Calculus
• Science & Medicine: Anatomy & Physiology (A & P) Biochemistry Biology (Bio) Biostatistics Earth Science Environmental Science General Chemistry (Chem) Healthcare Medicine Nursing Nutrition Organic Chemistry Physics (Phys)
• Social Sciences: Anthropology Economics (Econ) Geology Law & Justice Liberal Arts Liberal Studies Political Science Psychology Sociology

THE OBLIGATORY "IS THIS A SCAM?" QUESTION:
Considering the fact that you found my contact information online, it’s understandable to be skeptical regarding the legitimacy of my services. Therefore, I’m willing to do all of the following to help you feel more secure in trusting me with your academic needs:

• 1) Speak with you on the phone and answer any questions you may have so that you have the opportunity to assess and analyze my tone, articulation, accent, diction, dialect, regionalisms, pitch, vocabulary, word choice, intonations, and inflections.
• NOTE: I’m a New Jersey-born Irish/Italian-American, but I have been told that I speak in an erudite & articulate suburban American accent with a “professor style” voice somewhat resembling the voice of actor: Ben Stein.
• 2) Agree to do some homework questions of yours upfront with the work fully shown in real-time to prove my mastery of the course content.
• 3) Send you screenshots of at least five past scores I attained from completing exams & homework assignments for other students in the same type of class you need help with.
• 4) Send you full screenshots of written exam solutions I wrote up by hand for students in the past in the same course that you need help with so that you can see my neat handwriting.
• 5) Provide you with the contact information of students who have utilized my services in the past who would be more than willing to vouch for my skills.

HOW TO CONTACT ME:

• If you are interested in my services and would like to learn more info, please feel free to reach out to me.
• Text messages and email are the fastest and easiest ways to get in touch with me. However, I gladly accept phone calls.
• If I don't respond right away, I am most likely helping a student at the time and not currently available to speak on the phone. But I always make a solid effort to reply to texts, emails, and phone calls within an hour.

CONCLUSION:

• I take my work as a tutor very seriously, and I always aim to do my best to help my students excel in school. I have a solid and sincere passion for academic achievement, and with my help, I am positive that I can help students obtain very high grades with minimal stress and effort.
• Please feel free to contact me if you're interested in my services and would like to learn more. I'm available 24/7 via phone call, email, and text. Again, thank you for taking the time to read my Reddit tutoring ad, and I hope to hear from you soon!

OCT 2021 UPDATE: I am currently offering discount deals for requests for assistance with completing a student's entire course for the Fall 2024 semester (14 - 20 week courses acceptable), as well as discounts for students seeking help with multiple exams and/or multiple classes for Fall 2024. My availability for the Autumn 2024 / Fall 2024 semester will likely become limited very quickly as I receive more and more academic requests. Therefore it would be very advantageous to reach out to me for academic assistance before my schedule becomes too full.
MY CONTACT INFO:
WhatsApp: +1 (213) 594-5657
Call: +1 727 456 9641
Website: hiraedu. com
Email: [info@hiraedu](mailto:info@hiraedu). com