I really loved this brief moment between Fleabag and her dad. It’s almost like a small glimpse into what their relationship was probably like before mum died, he was less guarded and sillier perhaps. Now he’s a sad, weak man who’s so afraid of being alone that he lets himself be manipulated by a narcissist, and won’t even defend his own daughters for fear of losing that narcissist.
I really wish he’d have run from the wedding at Fleabag’s suggestion, but I guess that wouldn’t have been realistic. Some people will just deal with unhappiness as long as they don’t have to be alone, other people have the strength to leave something when they’re unhappy even if it means an uncertain future, like Claire.
I still find it sad how things ended for dad, but it’s hard to fully sympathise after all the stuff he turned a blind eye too. I find season 1 episode 6 especially hard to watch because of him.
I just love the writing of the characters in this show!

Inspired by Griffin saying that George Burns on awards shows in the 90s felt like the world’s oldest man….
I feel like Mickey Rooney and Kirk Douglas are among the more recent examples? Rooney was only 93 when he died but had been around for so long doing different things, and the persona added a lot to it.
Elaine Stritch was another who had kind of a career comeback in the early 2000s, won Emmys as Jack’s mom on 30 Rock, and remained active performing until her late 80s. (She also refused to use an ear piece or prompter on stage so fumbling with the lines became almost a trademark.)
Dick Van Dyke? He’s 98 and just won a Daytime Emmy!
Of course there’s Betty White.
I think the look also helps. Carol Burnett still works and shows up to ceremonies and seems incredibly sharp, but does not look like most 90-somethings.
Anyway, I love old actors and love to see them working into their later years if they have the wish & stamina to do so!

Hello Everyone! I have never shared my work with anyone, however I feel as though these lyrics I wrote are genuinely good. So, I'd like to share them with all of you! I also do not have a title for the song so any suggestions in the comments would be appreciated!
I am the echoes of a misinformed ideal sentimentality. I am no one’s handsome toy, no one’s favorite carnality. My body now blossoming is weeded away, as fairer fruits ripen in a seductive array. Oh blessed rain of old, thy tender drops I’ve never known. For unto the fairer blooms you give way. You, oh rain, ignore me in my parched soil; I am withering away.
Dissolving, dissipating, disintegrating right before your eyes. I’m as soft as the nostalgic fetish of days gone by. I am a gentle reminder of the fate of man. I am everything you want in your hands.
I am a confused misanthropic excuse of apologies. I am the reeking odor emitting from the toils of humanity. I am sex, I am purity. I am hate, and I am love, just not love for me. I am the sacred image in the riverbed. I am the burning zealous hatred in my head. I am the epitome of unfortunate looks. I am the kind of person they tell people to fear in storybooks. Because if not beautiful, then please be dead. If not consumable, then to loneliness, thou shalt be wed. Oh, my spirit is evaporating, and escaping to imaginary blissful peace. And on the winds, fragranced with sweet melancholy memories, I leave my dissolving youth behind. I never was worth the time. The time it takes to be young and beautiful, instead I am something pitiful. My weary eyes weep for what never was and for what I have become.
Dissolving, dissipating, disintegrating right before your eyes. I’m as soft as the nostalgic fetish of days gone by. I am a gentle reminder of the fate of man. I am everything you want in your hands.
The gentle doves, graceful and ravishing, flutter by as I’m ignored in my diminishing. The freedom in their holy wings, and the iridescent morbidity of being a spectacle. How deeply I want to be a spectacle. Oh, I long for their eyes to fall on me, and their lips to hail my beauty. Yet I am below those gentle doves. They, on the words of admiration, are lifted high above. Melting off my bones is the semblance of my days, realizing they are quickly fleeting away. I gorge myself to remedy the misery of being empty of connection with humanity. Foolishly I weep for the consequences of my gluttony. How lonely I am. How very lonely I am. Oh, the bitter juxtaposition taunts me. The raging desire to be desired. Yet I fear your eyes, and the thoughts of your mind in regards to my body. In regards to my laughter, to my abilities. Please, dear God, please, let me be invisible, unperceivable completely.
Dissolving, dissipating, disintegrating right before your eyes. I’m as soft as the nostalgic fetish of days gone by. I am a gentle reminder of the fate of man. I am everything you want in your hands.
Every smile, every hour that I’m happy adds to my demise. Every moment of joy realized on my face. And in its place old age shall take what once was youth. The dissipating collagen no amount of sunscreen may soothe. I am aging, I am the deprecating form of what once was a man. What once was grand slipped out of my hands and now on my being are the marks of disgrace and a life lived hard. The marks of a life lived through hardship. The marks of a life lived through the laughter of lips. The marks of a life that was mine, married to sacred time.
Dissolving, dissipating, disintegrating right before your eyes. I’m as soft as the nostalgic fetish of days gone by. I am a gentle reminder of the fate of man. I am everything you want in your hands, I am absolutely nothing but a man.

The hype is over, but anyway. I watched Grusch's testimony in the Congress.
For me, the whole speech sounds extremely slick. Phrases like "I saw an unidentified object using the capabilities I'm not aware of" won't make you a liar, even if you saw an aerostat (but couldn't identify it and didn't know its capabilities). All "alien" stuff is in the context of "someone told me" (which also won't make you a liar in any case since you just retold one's words).
On the other hand, Grusch talks a lot about transparency in the American military; he even mentions that some money isn't going where it should.
Isn't it all about a man trying to fix the system through public attention?

i’ve been on HRT for a year, im amab 18. i was on estrogen pills for most of the year they switched me to patches maybe 3-4 months ago and the changes have been so rapid than pills and it’s freaking me out. my boobs grew a lot and although they’re not super big they’re obvious. and my worry isn’t really about people’s judgement, maybe it is but apart from that i’ve realized i think they’ve been making me feel maybe dysphoric the other way around. i don’t wanna be a man forsure but i’m scared to look too much like a woman. i don’t feel much like a woman either now i’ve stopped hrt bc it’s been a bit overwhelming questioning my gender again. i love the effects of hrt i think i love having more hips it feels like i was meant to have them but the boobs are freaking me out crazy i’ve gone full blown panic about them and i’m scared it will ruin my life. i feel so sad and dumb. i’ve tried to think about my gender for the past week but not much clarity has came. i’m over analyzing what my identity might be and it’s kind of blown me out of proportion. i don’t know what i want anymore. i’ve considered maybe i’m non binary but for some reason that makes me sad. i thought i was a binary girl. i don’t wanna masculinize back again but i also don’t want boobs i wish i could be on it and not have them. what can i do? i’ve lost all hope of feeling happy again.

(22m) Long story short. I met this girl (25f) 3 years ago on Halloween. When we are together we are inseparable like it’s really meant to be and we’re together more than not. I don’t know if it was due to her being older than me and one of the more attractive females I’ve been with let alone loved, but for some time I was just so star stricken and fascinated under her spell I was blind to her party life style and all the red flags. I’ve never caught her red handed but I know there’s been plenty of instances of her sleeping around. I have been trying to grow a pair to get away for the longest. I want myself I know there’s better got myself she manipulated me so well. I hadn’t had intercourse with her in two weeks and last time I saw her she just said she was on her period. This time she goes “I’m trying to protect you”. I already knew where she was headed. She told me she had genital herpes. I literally broke down to my knees crying like it was me who had it I’ve never been so hurt. I love her so much I was blind to everything going on in her side life because I wanted to be. I wanted to prolong being hurt. But I waited so long I literally can’t be hurt any wide. The only way I could get away is by being verbally nasty to her. I don’t understand why I needed to be kept around as a trophy that’s all I was when I could’ve seen myself spending my whole life with this girl. She has a traumatizing past but it’s no excuse as to how she’s treated me and made me feel. I loved her so much I even had sex with her a couple more times. And she still is out partying etc. I couldn’t believe. Like she’s not phased. It’s been about a month of no contact. I know time doesn’t always heal but it makes things better. My main issues with myself right now is my clouded thoughts. I’m a fairly attractive guy getting attention is not a problem. But me feeling like I’ll never be able to open my heart up is. I can’t work without thinking of how she broke me. Every night right as I’m about to fall asleep my heart always start racing and the thoughts go a million miles an hour. Our whole relationship flashes through my eyes. I can’t look at a new girl without feeling as if she has evil intentions. I can’t even masturbate without her coursing through my brain thoughts of how it felt so right and I don’t ever want to feel a different woman or it’ll be bad thought of her getting dick from another man. I can’t sleep with another girl without thinking of her the whole time. I don’t want to be left with bad memories I don’t want to be left with a memory of her at all. I’ve tried to end things gently and peacefully to possibly put my mind at ease but that never works

A building held in high regards, its students considered royalty, the teachers? Merely servants and everyone else inferior to the students. A school holding secrets, words often held back, tongues tied and fear being the common factor in everyone's hearts. That was life was Ridlsbury High, a school for the elites of the country, the sons and daughters of the wealthiest ceos, politicians, athletes and celebrities. Made by one of such ceos in the last century Thomas Ridlsbury, he was the richest of his time and his descendants are the same. They also share his traits which include arrogance, an annoying sense of superiority and the feeling that they can never do any wrong. Liam Ridlsbury is only the latest in a long line to showcase those traits at school, the other rich kids at the school crowd around him praising him but the scattered and numbered few scholarship kids present at the school are the ones that get the short end of the stick. It only got worse when one of those scholarship students got killed mysteriously, now a new kid has arrived at the school in the name of the scholarship. He will uncover secrets, find out dirty facts hidden by the school and the students and navigate himself through the web of elitism which has been allowed to grow at the school. Will he meet the same fate as his predecessor or will he be successful in making a change?
Hey everyone! I hope you liked that little prompt, it had been an idea I got while watching the latest Netflix series Hierarchy, is the plot awfully similar? Most probably since I wanted to try something quite similar for the longest time but wasnt able to pin it down to what I wanted to do. So if this is your cup of tea, I would love to discuss it further with you and possibly make a longterm roleplay where we discover this plot together and find out where it goes.
As for my requirements, I prefer being detailed, I love to discuss things with my partners, I love doing worldbuilding, fleshing out the characters and making an experience which is fun for both of us. We would both be playing multiple characters including the side characters and I would prefer that we both are at least capable of writing a couple paragraphs. I like to consider myself to be somewhere between Literate and Novella but I do adjust to my partner, I prefer quantity as well as quality and I understand some scenes dont need to be dragged out or dont need several blocks of messages and that is totally fine. As for the plot itself, I would be looking for action, drama, mystery as well as romance and what I had in mind might consist of a double love triangle or well love polygon whatever you would want to phrase it as well as status clashes.
If this is something you find yourself interested in feel free to type out a message and be sure to include the password 'Dinosaur' in your first message so that I know that you read all of this. See you soon!

Hi guys I have a really upsetting update.
Currently looking for emergency accommodation after the step mother upped her game and started putting on the pressure more. No longer than two nights ago I was making a sandwich in the kitchen and my Father and step mother pushed me out of the way so they could put their bike helmets on the chopping board of all places???? Anyway. I asked if we had an mayonnaise in and my step mother replied
Step mother: no check yourself. Me: ok.
She then glared at my father and for whatever reason he completely lost it and said the following statements, you may need to re read the OP for some context on some.
. You are such a victim, your whole life you are a victim just like your mother
. All you cause around here is pain
. Get the fuck out I fucking hate you
. You are the most unwanted person in this household right now why the fuck are you here.
. Fuck off
He was stating all these comments while pointing and screaming in my face, my step mother smirking in the background. I did have some absolutely nasty comments to say in my head but I kept quiet. And replied “I’m not speaking to you while you have your voice raised.” To at which point my step mother then got up in my face and said “ungrateful bitch don’t speak to your father like that” to whom I simply replied: “sorry who are you to think you can tell me what I can and cannot do?” To which my father launched himself at me, (I’m unsure how far far he was planning on going) my step mother grabbed him and said “come on babe, we need a break from this toxic piece of work.”
After they left I started uncontrollably crying, and I rang my brother in complete panic begging him for advice on what to do, he drove to me as fast as he could and picked me and my pets up. He asked for me to find a friend to stay with tonight for my own safety. He then explains to me the reason why he left back in 2018. This exact thing with the step mother starting an argument and looking at my father for back up. My brother explained if I went back tonight he’d be worried the police may end up Involved.
This part comes with a trigger warning:
As I stated in the OP my father has helped me through a lot in the past, when my mother was abusing myself and my older brother he did his best to protect us. He helped me through short term psychosis when I was 14 and was there for the recovery. Last night I felt like my safety net the only parent I had left, the man I looked up to was no longer there, I unfortunately got so emotionally distraught from everything that’s happened since this upcoming of the wedding. I did go outside with a note and had intentions of no return, I will not go into details I will say I’m extremely lucky a police officer spotted something off about me and came to my aid before it was too late.
Before this happened I walked out of the house and to the end I my street, I was scared and in complete tears to which then I spot my step mother and father walking up the street coming towards the house. My father sees me and looks away in disgust and my step mother? Grabs her grandchild and screams across the street: “I LOVE MY FAMILY” then looks me dead in the eyes and smiles. - this was the final hit for me and why I’m so grateful there was an observant police officer to safe my life.
So as of right now I do have an appointment to seek help on what happened above and me getting to that point. I’m utterly devastated and heartbroken that I’m having to walk away from the one last thing I felt safety in. It’s extremely hard and I will admit I am the biggest mess I’ve ever seen myself. While waiting for emergency accommodation I’ve confided into my room, I’m scared to make a noise, I’m sneaking around to use the bathroom and kitchen as I do not want another argument to spout out.
Yes obviously the wedding is a write off for me I didn’t ever think a wedding would cause this much pain.
Thank you all for your kind comments on the previous post, I’m sorry for such an awful update. Here’s hoping that things will get better.

The hype is over, but anyway. I watched Grusch's testimony in the Congress.
For me, the whole speech sounds extremely slick. Phrases like "I saw an unidentified object using the capabilities I'm not aware of" won't make you a liar, even if you saw an aerostat (but couldn't identify it and didn't know its capabilities). All "alien" stuff is in the context of "someone told me" (which also won't make you a liar in any case since you just retold one's words).
On the other hand, Grusch talks a lot about transparency in the American military; he even mentions that some money isn't going where it should.
Isn't it all about a man trying to fix the system through public attention?

Hello world, I would like to share with you all the current custody situation that is going on with my daughter. I would love to hear your thoughts….
I have had primary custody of my daughter for her entire life (6 years). I got pregnant with her when I was 16 years old. Her dad was 18. Of course we thought we were “in love” at that age. lol!! We separated when she was 4 months old due to his severe alcoholism. I started finding him passed out drunk in our apartment on weeknights, and I was not about to have that kind of toxic behaviour around my daughter…. From that moment on, I had my daughter full time and her dad/his mom would take her every second weekend.
Here we are, 6 years later. I am 23 years old. I am now hapily engaged to an amazing man, we have a 3 bedroom apartment and are saving up for a house. My daughters father is 26 and is only now starting to get his sh!t together. He just got his licence and a 1 bedroom apartment. I have had those things since I was 16 years old…. Not trying to create any negative judgement, I just feel like those details are important to paint the bigger picture stability wise….
I have recently received a text message from him asking for 50/50 custody of our daughter, so he no longer owes me any child support. That is literally what the message says…. It wasn’t a nice thoughtful message asking to spend more time with our daughter and have more responsibility, no. It was literally stating that it was to avoid any child support payments (He has not even given me a dime in 4 months) and that he has all of the same rights to our daughter as I do.
I told him that I am not comfortable switching our custody arrangement. My daughter has lived with me for 6 years, I do not see how in any means it would be in her “best interest” to start bouncing back and forth between 2 homes when she has always had a loving and STABLE life with me!
Believe me, I am all for fathers having 50/50 custody when it is from the beginning of the separation and when loving the child is the #1 motive.
It is also important to mention that since receiving this text from him, I suggested that we slowly add on some more time to his weekends so they can spend some more quality time together. So, instead of her seeing him for 2 nights, it would be 4. Every second week from Thursday - Monday. He agreed, but he is still set on taking me to court for 50/50.
Since increasing the visits from 2-4 nights my daughter has started having MELTDOWNS when she is over there to come back home. She now begs me not to go over, and it breaks my heart because I don’t want to “get in trouble” by the court by restricting him access but I also feel like my daughter deserves to be heard. I don’t care that she is 6 years old. Her feelings matter. Every second weekend is her usual routine, just increasing the time by 2 extra nights has not been working out. We have not had any meltdowns before adding the extra nights on. I cannot imagine how she would react to going over there for a week straight….
I am curious as to what you think will happen in court? - Is he going to win? - Will they even care about my daughters feelings since shes so young? - Can he win shared custody with a 1 bedroom apartment?? - Is it fair to just pop in after 6 years when it’s convenient and change up a childs entire living situation?
I know that they try very hard to give fathers equal rights now due to the “moms always win” stereotype that they are trying to shatter. I just genuinely want what is best for my daughter. If my daughter adored her dad and loved her visits, I wouldn’t even fight the 50/50 but that is not the case here. I don’t see how switching up what my daughter has known her whole life to be in her best interest. I meet with a lawyer this week…

Recently rewatched the earlier seasons (1-5) after taking a break from the show before watching the more recent seasons (6-11). One thing I noticed on here is there is a lot of Ian hate especially in season 4-6. One thing I see are people giving the character flack for how he handled Mickey’s situation with coming out in season 4. I personally feel that yes, he gave Mickey an ultimatum, indirectly, but still. I feel that the name calling was a little too much. But I don’t blame him for feeling how he felt. Ian was out of the closet and didn’t want to date someone who was in the closet, ultimately dating in secret. I will concede he could have been more understanding to Mickey’s fear in that situation. But let’s be honest, with Terry out of prison, no doubt Svetlana would have had more control of Mickey. No more sleepovers at Ian’s place and Ian would have been seeing a lot less of Mickey while he plays the good dad and husband. He literally would have been his dirty little secret. TBH that’s not really fair to either of them. Ian came off as naive and a little childish but the the biggest thing some people don’t acknowledge was that Ian was manic during that time. So,some thoughts and actions were rash and impulsive.
In the end of season 5 and the beginning of 6, the characters were mostly victims of poor writing. What the were trying to go for was Ian not wanting to be a burden to Mickey. His coldness when Mickey was incarcerated was to spare both of them their feelings for each other. Ian never fell out of love with Mickey. You can tell from them reuniting in season for a brief time. I feel like the pause in them for Ian in season 6 and 7 (season 8 was weird) was good for him and made him more into the man he is in seasons 10 and11.

I know it sounds bad but hear me out. I woke up the morning of the trip extra horny. Something was off. The affirmation (Affirmation) file I usually loop in my sleep mask headphones wasn’t playing. Oh well I didn’t have time to worry about that now. I was on a tight schedule and could reflect on it on the plane. After I finished getting dressed and headed down stairs, my girlfriend called me into the kitchen to eat the breakfast she had prepared for me. I walked in and there was a bowl of cereal on the table. I told my girlfriend she knows I don’t eat cereal, and I will just get something at the airport. She then in a very authoritative voice featuring an Irish accent says” You will sit down and quickly eat your cereal. Obey Me.” I yelped “yes” without thinking and ate the cereal. I immediately felt all of my strength, vitality, and vigor leave me. I looked up and my girlfriend had a devilish grin on her face. I asked her what she did to me. She said we didn’t have time to go into all that right now. We would talk about it on the way to the airport.
On the ride to the airport she told me she found out about the love spell I cast on her. She says the affirmations I listen to while I sleep were nothing short of witchcraft. That without that magic there was no way someone like her would give someone like me the time of day. I was taken aback. I (47M) 5’7 380 lbs am the sexiest man alive. If my looks don’t get you just wait until I karaoke some Barry White, or Teddy Pendergrass while gazing into your eyes. There is no woman that can resist. She goes on to say. My love spell has turned her into a crazy jealous bitch. Those are her words. She said her friends were always on her asking her what she saw in me, and advised her to search my phone. She says she caught me red handed listening to the love spell personal magnetism recordings a week ago. She said she and her friends decided how to get revenge. They recorded a personalized version of Calia’s Curse (Calia's Curse) for me to listen to while I slept instead of the love spell sessions. She also explained that the cereal I had for breakfast was New Turd (New Turd ) a revolutionary new cereal that would make it impossible for me to cheat on her while in Mexico. She then says “ You will listen to Calia’s Curse every night while you sleep, and you will Facetime me each morning while eating the box of New Turd I packed in your suitcase. Obey me.” I yelped "yes" without thinking.
She then tells me to pull out the folder beside my seat, and to check my bank account. The folder has a very detailed itinerary. It includes restaurants and itemized meal options. There are also a few envelopes in the folder labeled bellhop, housekeeping, stuff like that. She says that I am going on a diet and that I have just enough funds to follow the itinerary she prepared for me and no more. I look at the total at the end of the list and look at my online banking. I see that most of my fun money for the trip is gone. It was transferred out of my account this morning. My balance matches her total. This itinerary is so bare bones there is no wiggle room.
As I’m flying to Mexico I reflect on all of this. There is no way I can let this stand. I decided I will call my shrink when I get to the hotel. I see my affirmation files are gone from my phone and in their place is the Calia’s Curse file. I deleted it. My shrink deprogrammed me over the phone. A work colleague lent me some money. I went to a Karaoke bar the first night of my trip. But not before changing all of the smart lock codes while I knew my ex would be at her yoga class. Being the sexiest man alive and singing a few sexy numbers that night found me a companion easily enough. I had to stop at a pharmacy on the way back to the hotel to pick up some Viagra. I Facetimed my ex that morning while in bed with my new companion. She was crying. I didn’t catch all of her blubbering, something about being locked out of the house and how could I cheat on her.
I calmly explained to her that she brought this on herself. So AITA.
This sub likes to obsess over what everyone looks like. So I already described myself. My ex is mildly attractive. 5’ 5”, 40-26-38. Think Halle Berry, Vivica A Fox, and Stacy Dash in their prime all rolled into one. She was very lucky to have me. I will have to note that while my ex had large breast, they where still smaller than my man boobs.
This post was inspired by New Turd.

Recently my orders for the pilgrim and dusk came in and I’d thought I’d give me thoughts. Fair warning I really only came into hobby a year and a half or so ago so I’m not the best with specific terminology but I’m going to do my best.
The Pilgrim
The pilgrim came first so it only felt right to start there. My main driver up to that point was the truth ear zero red. I was pretty happy with it but I thought I’d try the upper tier items to see how they compare. I was hesitant cause of the price point but I’d figured if the jump to to 300$+ IEM’s is anything like the jump from shitty earbuds to 20$ IEM’s it’d blow my mind and be worth it. And my first impression with the pilgrim was…I wouldn’t say disappointment but it wasn’t the leap I expected. It definitely sounded better especially with the details but it wasnt a giant leap. I can also say I felt the bass was somewhat lacking (more in quantity than quality) though I just used the impedance adapter that came with the zero red and that made it much better (for the purpose of this comparison though I’m using the pilgrim without this adapter as it doesn’t come with the IEM and didn’t use it for direct testing between them). Even without it though I would say the pilgrims are a good set, they’re just a tad too bright even if those upper notes sound good.
Unfortunately, while I do think the pilgrim is largely a good set, I somewhat mainly have negatives to say. My primary complaint is I really find them uncomfortable. I know the zero reds are a set that sorta infamously have the asterisk of not being for everyone due to comfort reasons but I could wear the reds all day without problems but the pilgrims got to be almost a pain pretty quickly. It’s less about the in ear and more the combination of the hard metal casing, the cables being more at an awakened angle rather than a curve at the front of the ear, and the weight of the IEM’s + cable pulling at the ear causing the front of the ear especially to not feel comfortable. At one point when listening to Sometimes I Moght be Introvert by Little Simz I was considering switching back to the reds because while not as good I felt they could be more relaxing.
Dusk
While I wasn’t super impressed with the pilgrim, I have to say I’m loving the dusk. The cable (at least the analog one) isn’t exactly the most premium but it’s comfortable and doesn’t get tangled easily which is really all I need, they go into the ear easily without the casing or nossle causing any difficulty, etc. I noticed the pins are a really tight fit which at first kinda felt like a hassle but considering how many times I’ve had the experience of an IEM coming loose after taking it on and off the cable I’d take a more secure fit over the extra few seconds of having to securely life it on and off, though considering one of the selling points for this IEM is the multiple cables it comes with it only felt right to mention that the process of switching isn’t exactly smooth.
On that note to talk about the dsp I think both sound good but yeah i preferred the dsp, one of the tracks when comparing dsp with analog was gone angels by mili where both were pleasant but for the dsp it just felt so smooth and like i could get lost in it. One of my concerns with dsp was i remember hearing Timmy from gizaudio say female vocals were a little recessed but after comparing with a few tracks by mili, beach house, Flo mili, and laufey, I can say while I do notice a difference I wouldn’t say they’re too recessed or even necessarily worse than analog. Unfortunately i do have an iPhone and in the words of Crin “If you’re on iOS, go fuck yourself” so yeah I’ve mostly been using the analog because of that and all direct comparisons between the pilgrim and dusk were done with analog because I didn’t feel like switching to the dsp cable and using my laptop. Kind of a bummer but I did find myself satisfied enough with the analog
As for the general sound everything just feels like it has volume to it but in a way which isn’t overwhelming or fatiguing. The sound stage is the thing I really noticed first, it feels a lot wider which combined with it not being as bright as the pilgrim helps it to feel less fatiguing and more ‘immersive’ in a sense. It’s strange because there are things that in a technical sense sense I think the pilgrim does “better” but even in songs which would benefit from those things I’d say dusk is better for me because it feels like more of a full package where no element is lacking. Like I’d say the pilgrim can be better for strings but to use the example of two of the songs I’d tested with, The Hustle by kiltro and Turkish Rondo by the Boccherini Guitar Quintet which have great strings to them, I’d say the dusk is better cause with the pilgrim I’d had the volume lower then I would’ve liked because the high sections felt a bit too much whereas with the dusk it felt like everything was balanced well and gave a full band like experience.
I think “experience” is the right word for how I would describe the difference. Both have their unique sounds but at the end of the day I’d say the pilgrim sounds good but the dusk sounds and feels good (both in a sense of the feeling of them physical IEM itself and the sound). The pilgrim is a set I could be happy with and get used to but whereas it was one I almost didn’t want to sit down for a full album with, with the dusk I just want to listen to as much as possible. It’s not outright better in every way but to me is a much better all rounder and conducive to what I want in my music listening experience. I’d even say aside from music its sound is something I find myself more comfortable with doing something like watching YouTube for an extended period of time.
In short, pilgrim is good but especially considering the price point if it was between this and the reds I already had, they’re better but I would return them as I don’t necessarily find them to be worth it. The dusk though, as much as I’m somewhat trying to talk myself out of spending $400 on iems when I already have a good pair, I’m likely going to keep them (and maybe look into a good lightning to usb-c adapter to use the dsp on my phone, if anyone knows of a good one especially one which also has a port for charging let me know)
Hopefully that made sense and could be helpful for anyone looking for comparisons between the two, I do have the super mix 4 coming next week and am planning to give my comparison/thoughts on those when they arrive. I’m honestly hoping I like them more than the dusk as I’ve heard some say they do because I’d be a lot more comfortable spending $150 then $400 for an upgrade.

Hello everyone, I hope my personal story helps to encourage and inspire others going through the same thing. When I look back at it now I can’t believe I ever got as bad as I did with my hoarding. I grew up in a family of hoarders which was 3 other people so naturally I did the same. The earliest memories I had was my back hurting as a boy, when recently, I realized it was because of my backpack that was packed full of junk, even my desk in elementary school was bad. It was so bad that the kids in school made fun of me for it, yet I had no self-awareness of the issue until many years later.
The first time I actually noticed I had a problem was when one family member (who was the only one in the family who wasn’t a hoarder) and I got into an argument, his words echoed in my head. “Look around, normal people don’t live like this!” At that moment, I stood in silence, confused as I looked around the room, it sparked something. Un-matching used furniture, lots of clutter, trash, tons of empty water bottles, etc etc. But I couldn’t fully grasp the problem, not yet, but a seed was planted in my head.
Growing up was really rough, to put it simply, our house looked like shit and we weren’t really allowed to have people over at times. (from the sheer embarrassment, even though we never really discussed it in the family) One day I had some co-workers invite themselves over after a shift and as soon as they went to my room, they stood there and said, “oh my God…how can you live like this?” I felt so unbelievably embarrassed, it was a shamefully painful experience.
In my mid 20’s I had to move, I knew I had things I needed to work on and in that time I grown to realize that I had a lot of stuff that I should get rid of. The process of decluttering began. Throughout the course of the next few years I did the best I could to make my room look better and I did have some progress, but I still struggled with holding onto things and was just a messy person. I was depressed, anxious and I felt alone. I would spend most of my day laying in bed and feeling a sense of hopelessness, sometimes I even wished for death. I had pee bottles and even had some bug infestations at a few points here and there. It was a shameful way to live and even embarrassing for me to talk about it now and I didn’t know how to get out of it, I felt trapped, BUT I never gave up on myself. I always had some determination. I did make some progress in time, but I never really helped to change my habits or behavior. I still managed to clutter and be messy, then one day I voluntarily decided to get into therapy. I always had a negative outlook on therapy, I thought it was embarrassing to go and it was only for crazy people.
Therapy helped tremendously, there were things that I needed to work on internally. One day it all just clicked for me. I got up and began the painful process of throwing things away, I sold things that I never used that had value, I donated things that were useful and in good condition, I threw away broken unused items. It was rough because it seemed like everything had some sentimental value to me or had some usefulness. After 5 years of therapy I can say that I no longer hoard and I feel fantastic. I love coming home from work. Even the little things make me happy. It wasn’t an easy process and it took time, but now I love inviting people over. My room is spacious and functional, I have a system set in place where I don’t let it get messy at all! “Cleaning my room” is pretty much vacuuming, making my bed and putting any clothes to wash. I’ve also lost 30lbs and I’ve been back in school the past 3 years. I am super proud of myself and I hardly recognize the man I am now, but I’m becoming the man I always envisioned myself to be.
If you’re going through the same thing, please don’t give up on yourself, you have to be your own coach and cheerleader. You CAN do it! Believe in you.
TLDR: Grew up in a household of hoarders, I was one for many years, got into therapy and now I am a neat person and I love it.

I won't delve into the full story of my breakup, but it wasn't a messy one. The guy in question did some things alright but other things were horrible, kinda love bombed me a little bit too. I ended it two weeks ago and he accepted that he was in the wrong.
After the breakup, some parts still thought this man was their god. Other parts wanted him to die in a fire. (I have a lot of VERY polarized parts). Other parts were more levelheaded about it.
I have been so confused about what the relationship actually meant to me, and to him. Was it love? If not then what the hell was it? Did he love me or was he using me? Plus a whole hell of a lot of other mental gymnastics that are too foggy to even put into words.
I realized: the confusion comes from having parts that are at different stages of healing. A lot of my parts are very healed now, and they caught a lot of his bullshit on the FIRST date. Yet, my parts that are desperate for love are still very burdened and VERY strong. They completely took over and I simply couldn't unblend for months.
Unblending after a relationship like that is like coming out of a haze. Questioning who I am. I'm finally starting to witness those little hurt parts who took over and latched onto his love bombing. I'm also appreciating the unburdened parts who noticed the BS he was putting me through and decided to seek advice and ultimately end the relationship.
It's confusing and painful shit but it's really only uncovering the hurt parts that were already hurting. It's a huge opportunity that I'm grateful for, even though some parts wish we could get in a time machine and prevent ourselves from meeting him in the first place.
Anyway if you read this far, thanks for coming to my Ted talk 😂 would love to hear any similar experiences if you have any.

Blasting off like a rocket man Heart in heart hand in hand Bleeding for you, on your command The journey is full of times Where the opportunity arises to compromise Don't choose lies Comfort over truth Shiny new things The soul doesn't pursue Look forward to the stars ahead The love we share The hate that's dead Full moon light Silvery memories in our bed Orange hairs in our bud Dispose and discard of the failed dud Shutting off your brain One in the same Mindgamed insults fuel the same Are we the same? Or all of youFs just complicit In creating the false shame Guess we'll find out Next time the cards are drawn Guns drawn Kountry boy standoff So high I'm land OFf before I takeoff Feeling the will Inside the pills Giving me power Absorbing energy levels Becoming our favorite flower Gathering the sun's love like a money shower Higher than you now Wanna see?
-ME (Who elSE)

In the Name of God, the Most Merciful, the Most Gracious.
Peace be with you!
Before I begin this article, I want to make an open declaration:
I testify that Rashad Khalifa was a messenger of God, the messenger of the Covenant whom God sent to the world in order to show us that the Quran was fully conveyed, fully preserved and fully enumerated in numbers and codes that still serve as a guard against corruption.

Introduction:

There's always been a lingering question in my mind about the Egyptian researcher whose name was Rashad Khalifa (God bless his soul). I never fully rejected him because of the Miracle 19 code he unveiled to the world. I always wondered, "Why would God allow an imposter to discover such an amazing miracle?" However, I always postponed doing thorough research about him and his claims, until a few days ago. Someone posted a thread here about him which prompted me to finally sit down and conduct deep research. This investigation revealed undeniable evidence that he indeed was a true messenger of God. I am literally still perplexed while writing this post. It doesn't make sense to me how the entire Ummah is so blind, as these things I have discovered are literally right there in the Quran, stated in very clear words. I know that Rashad did point out a verse which implied that it would be revealed, but I don't think it was as explicit as what I just noticed has been mistranslated and/or widely misunderstood.
This article will not deal with hidden messages or codes, in case you don't believe in those. Instead, I will discuss clear prophecies from the Quran that have been undeniably fulfilled by the messenger of God, Rashad Khalifa.
I will talk about Chapter 72 "The Jinn." This chapter is perhaps one of the most researched in the Submitters community, primarily because it contains hidden prophecies and because Rashad Khalifa's name is embedded in it mathematically and numerically. However, due to our deep engagement with the numerical aspects, we have somewhat neglected the actual context of what is being said. One of the main reasons why I previously have been reluctant when it comes to Rashad is because he claimed to have been told by Gabriel about the specific timing of the Hour. Now, after having conducted research where I discovered that the Quran literally is saying that a future messenger will reveal its "Ghayb" (Unseen), and verses saying that God would reveal its timing in the future to this future messenger, it has become very clear that Rashad could not have been an imposter.
Without further ado, let's begin this post.

The prophecy of revealing the timing of the Hour: "None reveals its due time except Him":

God states in the Quran:

يَسْـَٔلُونَكَ عَنِ ٱلسَّاعَةِ أَيَّانَ مُرْسَىٰهَا ۖ قُلْ إِنَّمَا عِلْمُهَا عِندَ رَبِّى ۖ لَا يُجَلِّيهَا لِوَقْتِهَآ إِلَّا هُوَ ۚ ثَقُلَتْ فِى ٱلسَّمَـٰوَٰتِ وَٱلْأَرْضِ ۚ لَا تَأْتِيكُمْ إِلَّا بَغْتَةًۭ ۗ يَسْـَٔلُونَكَ كَأَنَّكَ حَفِىٌّ عَنْهَا ۖ قُلْ إِنَّمَا عِلْمُهَا عِندَ ٱللَّهِ وَلَـٰكِنَّ أَكْثَرَ ٱلنَّاسِ لَا يَعْلَمُونَ

Translation:

"They ask you about the Hour, 'When will it be?' Say, 'Its knowledge is only with my Lord. None reveals its due time except Him. It became heavy upon the heavens and the earth. It will not come upon you except suddenly.' They ask you as if you are well-informed about it. Say, 'Its knowledge is only with God, but most of the people do not know.'" (The Quran 7:187)

The phrase: "يُجَلِّيهَا" (yujallihâ) is a verb in Arabic that means "he/she reveals it" or "he/she uncovers it." With "لَا" (Lâ) before it, it becomes a negated verb in the present tense and should be rendered as; "No one reveals it" The "it" here is the knowledge of "when," hence; "When will it be?' Say, 'Its knowledge is..."
The phrase: لِوَقْتِهَا (Liwaqtiha): It is a prepositional phrase in Arabic that translates to "at its time", "its due time" or "Its proper time" in English. The negating phrase that precedes it makes it: "No one reveals its due time..." The revelation of its timing is emphasized, and not the actual event itself. This is very important to understand.
The phrase: إِلَّا هُوَ (illa hu), this is an exception clause that signifies exclusivity, meaning "except Him."
In other words, only God is the One who reveals its due time, which directly also means that God will reveal its due time at some point in the future. If this is not the case, then why was the prophet directed to say that nobody reveals its due time except God? It's not a sentence that negates the revelation of its timing, but rather a sentence that specifies who the Revealer will be, by negating everyone else other than God.
But then the verse continues and states something very interesting:

ثَقُلَتْ فِى ٱلسَّمَـٰوَٰتِ وَٱلْأَرْضِ ۚ

Which translates to:

"It became heavy upon the heavens and the earth"

This implies that it (i.e. its knowledge) already was with them at that time because it "became/was heavy," which is a past tense statement in Arabic. During that particular time, only God knew (i.e. during the revelation of this verse), but its knowledge was within the Quran, embedded in it. Because what is it that became so heavy upon the heavens and the earth if not the knowledge of its timing? The topic of discussion is the knowledge of "when." It doesn't seem to be the event itself as it is speaking in past tense terms.
Quick re-analysis of the entire verse:

Phrase: يَسْـَٔلُونَكَ عَنِ ٱلسَّاعَةِ أَيَّانَ مُرْسَىٰهَا: They ask you about the Hour, "When will it be?"
Phrase: قُلْ إِنَّمَا عِلْمُهَا عِندَ رَبِّى: Say, "Its knowledge is with my Lord."
Phrase: لَا يُجَلِّيهَا لِوَقْتِهَآ إِلَّا هُوَ: None reveals its due time except Him.
Phrase: ثَقُلَتْ فِى ٱلسَّمَـٰوَٰتِ وَٱلْأَرْضِ: It became heavy (or "weighed heavy") upon the heavens and the earth.
Phrase: لَا تَأْتِيكُمْ إِلَّا بَغْتَةًۭ: It will not come to you except suddenly.
Phrase: يَسْـَٔلُونَكَ كَأَنَّكَ حَفِىٌّ عَنْهَا: They ask you as if you are well informed about it.
Phrase: قُلْ إِنَّمَا عِلْمُهَا عِندَ ٱللَّهِ: Say, "Its knowledge is with God."
Phrase: وَلَـٰكِنَّ أَكْثَرَ ٱلنَّاسِ لَا يَعْلَمُونَ: But most people do not know.

This is the only instance that seems to emphasize the actual event itself and not the knowledge of its timing:

"It will not come to you except suddenly"

So I don't really understand how some people see this verse as a rebuttal against Rashad's claim.
In another verse, God states:

ٱللَّهُ ٱلَّذِىٓ أَنزَلَ ٱلْكِتَـٰبَ بِٱلْحَقِّ وَٱلْمِيزَانَ ۗ وَمَا يُدْرِيكَ لَعَلَّ ٱلسَّاعَةَ قَرِيبٌۭ

Which translates to:

"It is God Who sent down the Book with the Truth and the Balance and whatever makes you know that the Hour might be near." (The Quran 42:17)

The phrase: يُدْرِي (yudrī): "he/it makes know" (third person singular masculine).
The suffix: كَ (ka): "you" (second person singular masculine).
Sunnis interpret it as "and what will make you realize that the Hour might be near?" i.e. as a question. But the focus is on the continuous action of God 'sending down' various things, including the thing that informs us that the Hour is near. Also, the word "يُدْرِيكَ" (yudrīka) is present tense, their English translations say; "what will make you know," which is future tense. They've been unfaithful in their translations just so they could cover up the prophecy.
The traditionalists have disregarded the grammar completely just to hide the fact that this verse says what it says. The knowledge of the timing of the Hour was always present within the Quran. The reason why He said "might be" is because it was obscured and there was a messenger to come that would be given instructions on how to uncover it. Had He not said "might" then He would have disclosed that it actually is near.
Traditionalists interpret it the following ways:

"And what will make you perceive? Perhaps the Hour is near."
"How can you tell? The Last Hour may well be near:"
"And what will make thee realise that perhaps the Hour is close at hand?"

All of their translations totally deviate grammatically. Also, removing the "," and "?" gives it a consistent flow. The entire sentence is a statement and all of it is connected to "it is Who sent down...":
God has sent down:

• The Book with the Truth
• The Balance
• That which would make us realize that the Hour has drawn near.

Crystal clear!

Chapter 72 - The chosen messenger with the knowledge of the the timing of the Hour:

This is where I became fully convinced about Rashad. While I was translating this chapter, I did so genuinely and have spent days looking through dictionaries and Arabic grammar rules and etc. There is no denying this man anymore.
Let's start with the 23rd verse.

Verse 72:23:

"(Mine is) but a conveyance from God and His messages; and whoso disobeys God and His messenger, then for him is the fire of hell, wherein he will abide forever."

The verse depicts Prophet Muhammad being directed by God to say this sentence, emphasizing that his task was solely a conveyance from God and His messages, which we all know to be the Quran. We are reminded that Prophet Muhammad's task not to interpret it (as the traditionalists claim). This is also what God explicitly says in 75:18-19. The chapter continues and reveals a crystal clear prophecy:

• 24: "Until when they see what they are promised, then they will know who is a weaker supporter and fewer in numbers."
  
• 25: "Say, 'I do not know whether that which you are promised is near, or my Lord has appointed for it a distant term.'
  
• 26: "[God is] the Knower of the Unseen, and He reveals unto none His unseen,"
  

- 27: "Except who He has chosen of a messenger, for indeed he will follow a path from before him (i.e. before his time), and after him will be a (guarding) monitoring."

Breakdown:

The phrase: "Until when they see what they are promised": Meaning the Hour. God says:

"Verily that which ye are promised is true; And lo! The Judgment will indeed befall." (51:5-6)

Many have totally missed this and I am a bit confused about how all of us could have missed it. I've googled a bit and haven't found anyone address this specific verse. When God says, "That which you are promised" in the Quran, it is usually the Hour that is being referred to.

• The phrase: "I do not know whether that which you are promised is near, or my Lord has appointed for it a distant term.": Prophet Muhammad is instructed to say that he has no knowledge of the timing of the Hour, whether it is near or far in the future. This verse also contradicts the Sunni Hadiths, which claim that the prophet allegedly indicated the Hour is near by signaling with his two fingers attached to each other.
• The phrase: "and He reveals unto none His Unseen": God does not reveal this "ghayb" (the Unseen) of the Hour to anyone, and then Says this:
• The phrase: "Except who He has chosen of a messenger": Except to this chosen messenger, which indeed was none other than Rashad Khalifa, God bless his soul and that of every messenger and prophet of God.

The word "ٱرْتَضَىٰ" is in past tense and translates to; "He Has chosen," which implies that it is not a general statement about what God does in regards to messengers in general, but rather something God indeed intends to do in the future with a specific messenger that already is chosen. It is talking about a future scenario because of the latter part of the verse where a word that is in a "non-past" tense is used, unabeling us to interpret it as something that already has occurred.
The word "يَسْلُكُ" (yasluku) comes from the root س-ل-ك (s-l-k), which generally means to follow a path, to enter upon a way, or to make a way through something:

Word: سَلَكَ • (salaka) I, non-past يَسْلُكُ‎ (yasluku)
to follow a road, to wend, to travel along
to enter upon a course
to behave, to comport oneself
to proceed, to act
to set foot, to enter

Source: wiktionary.org
The يَـ (ya-): This prefix indicates third person singular masculine in the present-future tense and could be "He" or "It."
And سْلُكُ (sluku): The verb stem from the root س-ل-ك (s-l-k) meaning "follow a path"
This word is rendered as; "he will follow a path/way," as it is a "non-past" word. In Arabic grammar, the term "non-past" refers to the verb forms that are used to indicate both present and future actions. Unlike in English, where we distinctly separate present and future tenses, Arabic uses a single form that can convey either present or future tense depending on the context or additional particles that specify the time frame. Now here's the tricky part; "Yasluku" is a non-past tense word, which means that it could be both present and future tense, there's nothing that specifies the tense for us in the preceding words except for the past tense phrase "He has chosen," but because nobody but God knew of the "Ghayb" of the Hour at the time of the revelation of this verse, "Yasluku" (He will follow) must be understood as a future tense word, and can't be present tense, because this messenger was not yet there. We are forced to decide its tense based on the context of these verses and what they are saying.
The verse that follows it includes elements of past actions ("they have conveyed," "He has encompassed," "He has counted"), but the purpose clause "so that he may make evident" (لِّيَعْلَمَ) indicates a future revelation to prove these past actions. This suggests a future-oriented purpose or consequence, where the revelation/clarification is yet to occur.
Therefore, the verse is referring to a future incident or happening in the sense that it is pointing towards a future clarification regarding past actions, which also proves that the verse before it also should be future tense. This is something that traditionalists totally have disregarded.
Take a look at how Sunnis translate "يَسْلُكُ":

(72:27:7) yasluku = makes to march

But in other instances:

(16:69:6) fa-us'lukī = and follow (71:20:1) litaslukū = That you may go along (72:17:8) yasluk'hu = He will make him enter

Why this discrepancy? Why have they chosen, not the primary, not the secondary, but rather some quinary definition of this word here for this specific verse to say "March"? Because translating it faithfully exposes them and it would contradict their fabricated Hadiths.
Accurate Translation and Breakdown:

إِلَّا (illâ):
Except
مَنِ (mani):
who
ٱرْتَضَىٰ (irtadâ):
He has chosen
مِن (min):
Of
رَّسُولٍۢ (rasûl):
a Messenger
فَإِنَّهُۥ (fa-innahu):
Then indeed, he
يَسْلُكُ (yasluku):
He will proceed upon a way/will follow a way, He will causes him to follow a way
مِنۢ (min):
From
بَيْنِ (bayni):
Between
يَدَيْهِ (yadayhi):
his hands

The phrase: "between his hands": Idiomatically meaning, "before him" i.e. a time before him.
Same idiom is used here:

"...confirming that which was before him (lit: "between his hands") in the Torah." (The Quran 5:46)

The last part of the verse (i.e. 72:28):

"...and after him will be a (guarding) observation/monitoring."

The future tense "Will be" is added here because of what I've explained earlier.
The phrase; "رَصَدًۭا" (Raṣadan) literally means "an observation/monitoring." They have done the same unfaithful misinterpretation and mistranslation here too. This is how they have rendered it:

"and behind him observers"
"angel-guards before and behind them"
"watchers to go in front and behind"
"guards who go before him and behind him"
"and a guard behind him"
"march before him and behind him,"
"watching guards (angels) to march before him and behind him."

This word comes from the root "ر-ص-د" (R-S-D), which carries the meaning of observing, monitoring or lying in wait. Edward William Lane (d. 1876) wrote in his Arabic-English lexicon (where he defines "رصد") that it implies (or could imply); "for the purpose of guarding," but it does not literally translate to "guards" in English. This word (i.e. Rasadan) can be translated as "a monitoring," "an observation," or "lying in wait," and one could add "guarding" in brackets for deeper clarification of its definition. The 9th verse of this chapter also uses this same word:

"And we used to sit on places therein to listen. But he who listens now finds a flame in wait for him;" (72:9)

But means "in wait" here because "...finds a flame in observation/monitoring for him." makes no sense.
The traditionalists render it as, "a guard(s)," and the only place they have rendered it like this is this very verse:

(72:27:13) raṣadan = a guard

While in other verses, they've rendered it (I would say somewhat) accurately:

(72:9:13) raṣadan= waiting
(78:21:4) mir'ṣādan = lying in wait
(89:14:3) labil-mir'ṣādi = (is) surely Ever Watchful
(9:5:14) marṣadin = place of ambush
(9:107:9) wa-ir'ṣādan = and (as) a station

Source: https://corpus.quran.com/qurandictionary.jsp?q=rSd#(72:27:13))
It is quite revealing that they have mistranslated this word in this particular instance where God is conveying this prophecy.
The word "Rasadan" (رَصَدًا) in Arabic, when used in the Quran, typically refers to something set up or placed as a means of observing, guarding, or waiting. It can be associated with concepts like watchfulness, surveillance, or a place where someone lies in wait:

1. Description of a place: "Rasadan" can refer to a place where one waits or watches.
2. Description of an object: It can also describe an object used for observing or watching.
3. Description of an event: It might describe the act of waiting, observing, or watching for something to occur.

It could also describe a general description of a time. It is not used to describe people. Simply put, it describes a place, object, or event related to observation, surveillance, or waiting, and is not used to describe people. Why traditionalists have chosen to interpret it as "guards," "angels," or other entities is very puzzling, especially given that there is no inherent singular or plural form, nor anything that implies it refers to entities. It is a noun, not a verb, so it does not have tense or person as verbs do, and it is not conjugated for tense or person. I genuinely wish a Sunni could respond to this post and elaborate on why all of their Quran translations have rendered this word in such an unfaithful way.
The verse continues; "Wa min Khalfihi" (and after him), which they have rendered as "and before him." While this is possible and is not technically a mistranslation, the word that follows is "Rasadan" and is not in plural or singular and literally just means "an observation/monitoring." You can triple check every Arabic dictionary in the world to confirm that I am not just making stuff up here.
Their misinterpretation is achieved by deviating from the accurate grammar behind each word. To be able to make an erroneous interpretation such as theirs, they've ignored the specific numbers of words, their persons, their tenses and much more:

• - He will follow a way from before him = This entire phrase is in 3rd person singular in Arabic, and likewise in my English translation.
• - And after him = This is also in third person singular, just as it is in Arabic, i.e., "Khalfihi."
• - A monitoring = No tense or person or anything that implies that it is an entity.

What is this "a (guarding) monitoring"?

The guarding monitoring that would be after him, I interpret to be the miracle code of the Quran that Rashad discovered, the Miracle 19 and other mathematical codes that have been found within the Quran. These miracles not only act as a safeguard against corruption and tampering but we are in a time where we are literally able to monitor the entire Book through monitors and use Miracle 19 to confirm that the entire Quran is with us, which is interesting to note. The literal text states that an observation/monitoring will be after him. We are indeed the first witnesses of this fulfilled prophecy and we are living in the time where the monitoring is being done.
Understanding all of this obliges us to accept Rashad's claim of messengership and never doubt him again.
The last verse of this chapter is the most intriguing and most telling one,

but this post is too long and doesn't allow more characters so check the comment section to find part 2.

My changes.
World:
Ozma and Salem are believed to be first-human/gods creator that together created mankind. Both are praised in churches. In "The parents" religion lore, it is believed that humans had made disgusting blashemy against gods, making Ozma leave world and Salem to wept in saddness. Grimm are creatures of dark made from Salem's tears and hunt evil humans. Grimm after death turn into dark goo that needs to be banished by paladin/knight or priest. It can infect humans and turn them into mindless zombie like creatures(they can use weapons and be turned to Cultists by Tyrian who leads Salem's despair. Infection can be cured but it is hard)
There are two churches of "all parents", International Church and Salem's dispair. International Church is akin to Templars when Salem's despair is like death cult(exluding killing themselfs).
Salem's Despair is lead by it's "pope" Tyrian. They somehow menaged to tame Grimm to aid them in battles against Church order, nobody knows how they done it.
Goal of Salem's Despair is to open portal to summon both Salem and Ozma to purge earth from wicked, cultists believe that such show of their devotion will make them chosen people of gods that will survive the purge. To acomplish this task, they believe that they need to bring all artifacts together to summon them.
Of course International Church led by Ozpin wants to stop them. Ozpin is not Ozma, Popes of international church just take name starting with O when they become popes.
Both ozma and salem don't do anything in world till being summoned, they are disapointed in mankind and wait till it will get better.
Atlas is named high Mantle being rich part of kingdom and it is situated on mountain's side.
No kingdoms because kingdom can't exist without a king, so we have nations. Mistral is a country plunged into anarchy and Vacuo has become a vassal of Vale.
Mistral is divided in two parts, controlled territory and lawless one. As name suggest controlled territory is the part under rule of Mistral's gov.
All nations have armies but Vacuo one is mostly militia under Vale's control.
Mantle's army is the strongest one and most advanced too. But "advanced stuff" like robots, mechs and massive flying battle ships are made in small ammount because it is expensive as fuck.
In Vacuo exist big rebel group called "Vacuo's liberation army("VLA") that fights against Vacuo's gov, Valian units(like valian army and Rich families mercenaries) and SDC
Rich families like Schnee or Winchesters have their own personal mercenary armies.
Instead of white fang(stupid name), there is United Faunus Front(UFF) lead by Sienna. Ghira's organization was simply called International Faunus Movement(IFM)
Every faunus is cat faunus and they are divided in four groups:

1. Valian faunus, descended from liberated slaves who, together with the Vale army, arrived and settled in Vale after the World War. Almost completely assimilated into Valian population and often serve in it's army.
2. Mistralian faunus, descended from slaves liberated by Vale who remained in Mistral. Due to their history, they often join the UFF to take revenge on the Mistralian population.
3. Mantlian faunus were slaves or faunus immigrants from Magierane or Mistral. The majority of the Faunus population in Mantle is employed by the SDC. Under Jacques who decided to use faunus as source of votes, they are treated fairly well. Thanks to it, SDC is mostly safe from UFF attacks. But this also created of many theories that UFF is in fact founded by it to destroy SDC's competition.
4. Magierane faunus, divided into local and migrant. The locals have the features of Bengal tigers, one of them is partly Adam. The migrants were former slaves from the rest of the world.

First years of beacon(yang, weiss, blake) are 18, Ruby is 16, Adam is 24, Winter is 23. Taiyang/Qrow are 44. Huntsmen schools now are now schools of Church order.
Character changes(names + small info)
Adam Taurus -> Adam Khan Info: He is nothing like og. Now he is black haired tiger faunus, tall and proud. Trained from young age, Adam is killing machine that rips apart anybody that dares to opose him. He wants to marry Blake to crowns himself as next Chieftain of magierane. Biggest change is that he is Jacques son and he loves his father. Yup, in my idea Jacques loves his bastard son and helped Sienna create UFF. Both have good relationships thanks to Jacques many "work" visits to Magierane.
Taiyang Xiao-Long -> Tyler Drake
Info: One of the most deadly men walking on Remnant, works as mercenary for most powerful families. It brought him lot of friends and enemies alike. He is still softie when it comes to his baby girls
Yang Xiao-Long -> Sunny Drake Ruby Rose -> Ruby Drake
Info: Those gals only got name change, ok maybe Yang got little more slutty
Summer Rose/Raven Branwen -> Summer Drake(Maiden name Nikos) Info: Summer and Raven mashed to one character. Once deadly templar, after becoming mother, Summer decided to retire and work in small school in Patch. Raven's right hand woman is now Hellen Nikos, Pyrrha's younger sister.
Qrow Branwen->Autumn Nikos Info: Summer's Brother. Say goodbye to happy drunk uncle, this one is die hard patriot of Mistral. Lover of order and devoted beliver of Ozma. He is hard ass but loves his family.
Sky Lark -> Simon Lark Info: Now he is named simon, fight me cowards
Dove Bronzewing -> Devin Bronzewing Info: Who the fuck, names their son a pigeon?
Bart Oobleck -> Edmund Oobleck Info: His name is hard to write. Also he and Port are girl's cool uncles.
Glynda Goodwitch -> Glynda Oobleck-Goodwitch Info: Yup, our ol witch felt into hands of charming coffe addict
Whitley Schnee -> Jason Schnee Info: Athletic, Ambitious and Smart, in short he is an ASS. He is trully his father son.
Jacques Schnee -> Jacques Durand-Schnee Info: Far more proud but also far more carring. This dude goes from cold blooded killer into family man really quick. Hard but fair, loves his kids and even his white haired wife. Poor soldier that got into most powerful family of Mantle by pure luck.
Jaune Arc -> Arthur Drake Info: Third child of Duncan Drake, young Arthur always wanted to be a knight of holy order. With years of training under watch of his father and uncle, he is ready to take Beacon in STORM!

It's incredible. When I say it's incredible you better believe it because I am not easily impressed therefore when I am impressed it must be incredible. I have a fascination with human beings which is an extension of my desire, lol that's the ego responsible for that because it's a desire, to answer questions. I have a fixation on not just answering questions but understanding the question in all angles of the question. Such as what is the nature of the question asked. Where does the question come from exactly. Why ask the question. How does the question work. What is the point of the answer exactly. What effect does the answer to a question have on the external world and Earth. These kinds of things.
I was not brought up and raised with looking down on, or looking up to for that matter, other people. However most other people were and i've found this to be so or else I would not say that because their behavior and words have indicated so. I have found that my misunderstandings with dealing with other people in this life have stemmed from the simple fact I never took into consideration why someone acted a certain way being they simply looked down on certain aspects and things.
I wondered alot "how is it that people could see another human being and think that person because of their job was anything but another human being worthy of the essentials of existence food, shelter, and water?" I realized that the missing puzzle piece had been there the entire time. People have simply been taught something I was not therefore they understood this where I did not until I had encountered it enough to understand the behavior.
They simply were taught how and to look down upon and also to look up at others. I'm going to make an example of how this lesson is taught to children and where it all begins. It starts from an adult and it doesnt have to be from the parents it can be from really any adult the child hears something like this from "If you don't try hard enough you'll end up scrubbing toilets" "If you fail at school you'll end up flipping hamburgers" and I can say this in many worse ways but the example stands.
This lesson has had all kinds of awful horrendous repercussions on society and human beings. Now I am going to make this clear and it is always up to whoever hears or reads my words to make up their own mind. I want it to always be known I am not here to tell you what to think but what I think.
I do not know the complete blueprint or schematic for the pathway to a not perfect but more pleasant and thus a better by definition world to live in however I do know the first brick in that pathway is this. Understand no one is lesser than you and no one is better than you but also have common sense about it in this you can still think for a split second that the person that cuts you off in traffic is an asshole because you are a human not a machine and to think you will never think a negative thought is absolutely foolish but you can think no one is lesser or greater than you because I have done it for 33 years now and literally up until a few seconds ago I understood this lesson that is 100% a curse being placed upon people by frustrated, well intentioned, etc. people.
I have drawn and illustrated the lesson of consciousness as flowing through everyone and everything. Many people have interpreted this lesson incorrectly because I wasnt the first to come up with this concept and truth. Just one of the newest to understand it and realize it. I will now reiterate the lesson and teach it once again in an effort to clarify what universal consciousness is exactly.
These words Energy/Spirit/Soul/Consciousness/Life/Aura(Auric Field) all have the same context and meaning in a very direct and important way. I will use the term Energy for simplicity. Energy flows through us and all around us and it is universal. That means the same energy that is in me is in you and that same energy in us is in the trees, the animals, the plants, the flowers and everything else including your car and electrical system in your home. Heat waves are a very visible way to see this phenomenon because what is heat but thermal energy the word thermal being irrelevant because at it's essence it is energy therefore the heatwaves are energy waves. Let us see it as "Spiritual Wifi" also. As I said I was not the first to realize this perhaps it was someone in the East perhaps ancient tribes of north America but I do know this that 'My SPIRIT shall not abide in HUMANS for ever, for they are flesh; their days shall be a hundred and twenty years' (Gen. 6:3). What I have just typed/written here is 100% what it means. Genesis 6:3 is a confirmation of the conceptual truth that is universal consciousness. It is also written that God breathed into us the breathe of LIFE. Electrons are at the essence of this. Nothing lives, moves, or animates without Electrons/Electricity/Energy/Life/Spirit/Soul/Consciousness.
Now I have to clarify something many people have misunderstood about this conceptual truth they believe that because the spirit of God is within us that makes them God and that is not correct or true. That is a misunderstanding at it's best and a deceptive act of malice intent at worst. A popular phrase concerning this that has been born from the misunderstanding is this "We are all God" but we are not God we merely have God in us. We did not originate this energy nor did we create it therefore we cannot be God what lies at the source as far as I know at this moment in time must surely be God. Once more and very importantly is this because the spirit of God i.e. Spiritual Wifi connects all of by simply running through all of us and everything we are all the same and we are all one in the spirit. These physical bodies will die. Within them is our ego. The ego is all which separates us the children of God from realizing the simple truth no one is lesser or greater than another.
That is the lesson for today. Do not walk through life thinking the cashier at McDonald's or the janitor or the millionaire or the billionaire alike are different. Walk through life with the simple understanding that we are all the same. Walk through life in realization that no one should go without the 3 basics food, shelter, and water. If the game must be played upon this Earth called wealth acquisition then at least have the love of yourself and decency for yourself not to make another child of God go without the 3 basics because at the end of the day we are all one and one in the same.
I'm Kurt The Gardener and you are always welcome in Nowhere

It's incredible. When I say it's incredible you better believe it because I am not easily impressed therefore when I am impressed it must be incredible. I have a fascination with human beings which is an extension of my desire, lol that's the ego responsible for that because it's a desire, to answer questions. I have a fixation on not just answering questions but understanding the question in all angles of the question. Such as what is the nature of the question asked. Where does the question come from exactly. Why ask the question. How does the question work. What is the point of the answer exactly. What effect does the answer to a question have on the external world and Earth. These kinds of things.
I was not brought up and raised with looking down on, or looking up to for that matter, other people. However most other people were and i've found this to be so or else I would not say that because their behavior and words have indicated so. I have found that my misunderstandings with dealing with other people in this life have stemmed from the simple fact I never took into consideration why someone acted a certain way being they simply looked down on certain aspects and things.
I wondered alot "how is it that people could see another human being and think that person because of their job was anything but another human being worthy of the essentials of existence food, shelter, and water?" I realized that the missing puzzle piece had been there the entire time. People have simply been taught something I was not therefore they understood this where I did not until I had encountered it enough to understand the behavior.
They simply were taught how and to look down upon and also to look up at others. I'm going to make an example of how this lesson is taught to children and where it all begins. It starts from an adult and it doesnt have to be from the parents it can be from really any adult the child hears something like this from "If you don't try hard enough you'll end up scrubbing toilets" "If you fail at school you'll end up flipping hamburgers" and I can say this in many worse ways but the example stands.
This lesson has had all kinds of awful horrendous repercussions on society and human beings. Now I am going to make this clear and it is always up to whoever hears or reads my words to make up their own mind. I want it to always be known I am not here to tell you what to think but what I think.
I do not know the complete blueprint or schematic for the pathway to a not perfect but more pleasant and thus a better by definition world to live in however I do know the first brick in that pathway is this. Understand no one is lesser than you and no one is better than you but also have common sense about it in this you can still think for a split second that the person that cuts you off in traffic is an asshole because you are a human not a machine and to think you will never think a negative thought is absolutely foolish but you can think no one is lesser or greater than you because I have done it for 33 years now and literally up until a few seconds ago I understood this lesson that is 100% a curse being placed upon people by frustrated, well intentioned, etc. people.
I have drawn and illustrated the lesson of consciousness as flowing through everyone and everything. Many people have interpreted this lesson incorrectly because I wasnt the first to come up with this concept and truth. Just one of the newest to understand it and realize it. I will now reiterate the lesson and teach it once again in an effort to clarify what universal consciousness is exactly.
These words Energy/Spirit/Soul/Consciousness/Life/Aura(Auric Field) all have the same context and meaning in a very direct and important way. I will use the term Energy for simplicity. Energy flows through us and all around us and it is universal. That means the same energy that is in me is in you and that same energy in us is in the trees, the animals, the plants, the flowers and everything else including your car and electrical system in your home. Heat waves are a very visible way to see this phenomenon because what is heat but thermal energy the word thermal being irrelevant because at it's essence it is energy therefore the heatwaves are energy waves. Let us see it as "Spiritual Wifi" also. As I said I was not the first to realize this perhaps it was someone in the East perhaps ancient tribes of north America but I do know this that 'My SPIRIT shall not abide in HUMANS for ever, for they are flesh; their days shall be a hundred and twenty years' (Gen. 6:3). What I have just typed/written here is 100% what it means. Genesis 6:3 is a confirmation of the conceptual truth that is universal consciousness. It is also written that God breathed into us the breathe of LIFE. Electrons are at the essence of this. Nothing lives, moves, or animates without Electrons/Electricity/Energy/Life/Spirit/Soul/Consciousness.
Now I have to clarify something many people have misunderstood about this conceptual truth they believe that because the spirit of God is within us that makes them God and that is not correct or true. That is a misunderstanding at it's best and a deceptive act of malice intent at worst. A popular phrase concerning this that has been born from the misunderstanding is this "We are all God" but we are not God we merely have God in us. We did not originate this energy nor did we create it therefore we cannot be God what lies at the source as far as I know at this moment in time must surely be God. Once more and very importantly is this because the spirit of God i.e. Spiritual Wifi connects all of by simply running through all of us and everything we are all the same and we are all one in the spirit. These physical bodies will die. Within them is our ego. The ego is all which separates us the children of God from realizing the simple truth no one is lesser or greater than another.
That is the lesson for today. Do not walk through life thinking the cashier at McDonald's or the janitor or the millionaire or the billionaire alike are different. Walk through life with the simple understanding that we are all the same. Walk through life in realization that no one should go without the 3 basics food, shelter, and water. If the game must be played upon this Earth called wealth acquisition then at least have the love of yourself and decency for yourself not to make another child of God go without the 3 basics because at the end of the day we are all one and one in the same.
I'm Kurt The Gardener and you are always welcome in Nowhere

I keep getting this gut feeling that something terrible is about to happen. I can't describe it any other way so I guess this is what people are referring to when they use that phrase to describe generalized anxiety lol. I never related to it because years of ptsd dissociation and just, expecting it to feel more thoughtful, more delusional I guess. It's not that I'm paranoid of the end of the world or losing my home or anything outside of the ordinary— it's more like the feeling I would get before expecting someone to say I did something wrong, or the feeling I get right after realizing I forgot something important, but without the context, hence just "something bad is about to happen." Oddly enough, I've noticed it uptick since my situation has gotten better. This could def be more ptsd centered for me personally, but I can't help but be confused as to why I'm increasingly anxious now that I'm not in an abusive relationship, now that I'm in a bigger apartment, living with a friend I love and have known for years, saving more money than I ever have, having an amazing support system, loving myself more than I ever have before and only expecting that love to keep growing, etc. I think I've been so used to chaos and suffering that now that it's going away slowly... I feel like I can smell it coming even if I know it's not lol. I'd love to hear about others' experiences with these impending doom, gi issue type related symptoms of anxiety. Maybe it's to calm my mind or find some new insight, whatever it is lmao. How does this stuff manifest for you? If at all

In October 2022 we began talking about our dream wedding and my fiancè wanted a small wedding with no more than 50 people, in part bc he doesn't have parents and only a brother, and didn't want to be the only one sans-family.
I was the girl who planned her wedding her whole life and couldn't imagine celebrating without everyone. I asked if we could compromise and have a large reception in my hometown after our small wedding in our home state 12 hours away. That's been the plan since. It was perfect because I'd have one more event to deal with any post-event depression, plus I could see everyone.
Well our small wedding was Friday, and my husband was right. It was perfect. I had time to talk to everyone. What I thought would just be a nice dinner with those we loved to save the dancing for the "big event," became a full dance at the request of guests who won't be able to attend my hometown reception. At one point almost everyone was on the dance floor. My husband's chosen family/best friends are WONDERFUL. I enjoyed my day and it didn't just happen in a blur.
There is no post-event depression here. It was so much fun being a bride and watching my vision come true for the man of my dreams. I had the good advice from past brides to let go of the small things that didn't come to fruition, so I did. But now it's done and I don't need to do it again. Just wanna be a wife and plan my honeymoon.
I do not want my large reception, hahahhaha. People have already RSVP'd and have said they're looking forward to celebrating next month. I cannot cancel. I am almost tempted to do even more minimal decoration than this wedding (I kept my decorations very simple), so I can just show up. I was excited to wear my dream dress twice, and I will, but I'm tempted to bring my bachelorette dress to change into because the full-length gown is kind of exhausting. For brides who did two events, do you have any advice for the second one, to make it enjoyable and not just another thing of stress and/or obligation?