I (32F) have been dating this guy 34M for a year. A year ago, We met on a dating app in a certain city where I was working temporarily(I was on a sabbatical and working with an art festival) and he was attending a friends wedding. We ended up connecting greatly on music and whatnot and spent 2 nights together. He then returned to his city but pursued me. I had a job offer there and then we met again. And soon, though I didn't take the offer and returned to my hometown, it turned into a long distance relationship.
We took trips and met in his city and other places , for about a week each month but we always stayed in luxurious hotels, mostly paid by him. he was super loving and attentive and everything I dreamed of. He earned well and established this story of how he travels between his hometown and city of work frequently. Now I can see that it was blatant love bombing.
The first 6-8 months of our relationship, I was also smoking up(h) and then quit. He was the one supplying it to me. I have proof. Pretty soon, I slipped into anxiety and depression and have been pretty low since some months now. However, we still continued dating. His availability kept decreasing. I felt things were off/was doubting he is cheating on me but I kept thinking it's me and my anxiety that's telling me these negative things. I did ask him such questions directly and ofcourse he would deny them.
I would blame and hate myself for being depressed and not being able to talk/be a "good girlfriend " on our calls. He would call me only on his commute to the office or gym and somehow, I was so in my head, I didn't even notice. The calls before sleeping were almost none, by now.
2 weeks ago, I caught him lying over a small thing and the got hurt/a bit alert. He apologised, gave a reasonable excuse and I let it go. I once video called him out of the blue and he wouldn't show me his home. I was sharing this with my friend, who hinted that he maybe married and after some checks, I just found out yesterday that he is married since 2016. And has a 3 year old kid.
He doesn't know I know yet. I have pictures, WhatsApp chats as proof. And all the hotels we have been to will have both our id proofs.
Is this a punishable crime? To have hid his marriage. Does it count for fraud/scam/sexual abuse. Do I even file a case or just disclose things to his wife(I have her number and email). I want to confront him in personal but I think that emotional release may be even more disturbing.
If I file a case, how does it look going ahead? I just really want to punish him and now, im realising he may have done this so many times before to be able to be so smooth at this.
I have no clue what to do. I have been so deep in depression and so ashamed by it. I am realising how badly Gaslight i was for a year..I am also figuring out my next career step since the sabbatical, have been working on design projects and my self esteem has dipped majorly.
I thought I finally found the one. I thought I'll be marrying this guy. And get away with it!!!! HOW?! I'm unable to process what's happening.
Note: Yes, I'm in therapy. Have been for more than a year, looking for another therapists. Have also consulted psychiatrists for meds, one of them diagnosed me with ADHD but I'm unable to get over my fear of meds. I want to get better without them( yes, exercise, yoga, sleep, meditation )And I'm trying. But so far, I am having a hard time being motivated to do anything.

I (19M) met my best friend (19F) about 4 years ago during the end of my Freshman Year in High School. In that time, she was dating someone and I was dating someone and eventually, both of our relationships went to crap because of very immature reasons that were common with kids our age. I was afraid to be alone after my break up so I ended up getting closer to her and it got to the point where we began to talk every single day, and that streak hasn’t ended since. I had a feeling about her even during that time but went on to enter a situation-ship that turned into an actual relationship for about a month until that too ended unceremoniously. She was there for all of it and even gave me the confidence to end the relationship with my ex after my ex said that I “wasn’t a priority,” something I’ll never forget. That line hurt like hell after putting so much energy into caring for her.
My second ex, the situation-ship one, would joke around with my feelings afterward and try to talk to me months after our breakup. For context, I told her never to speak to me again after she claimed she loved me then went on to date another guy as reported by my best friend. So this behavior was very detrimental to my mental health and made things a lot worse for me. My best friend however, protected and defended me from her actions. My ex let it slip that she was afraid for my bff to find out we were talking because she had scolded her before.
Eventually, that ended and up until this point, my bff was someone who was scarily similar to me and sorta brought me out of my shell. I changed a lot of my “loner” ways for her and would walk to class with her, not even speaking sometimes, just enjoying her presence. We’d have these little moments between each other and got mistaken for a couple a few times too. She had an affinity towards me but it was nothing romantic.
Fast forward to last year and I’m starting to take notice of some strange feelings for her and through subtle prodding, it was still clear she wasn’t into me in that way. There’d be little clues of something brewing within her heart but not enough to act.
Now this is where it gets interesting. 2024 has probably been our best year yet and the crazy part is that we haven’t seen each other in-person since our mutual friend’s graduation party which was last year. We have plans to travel across the world, live in some apartment together, own a dog together, dress up for halloween as Agnes and Kristofferson from Fantastic Mr. Fox, and a bunch more like me cooking for her and us doing each other’s hair. We text and talk to each other like we’ve been married for 20 years. She’ll tell me when something’s wrong and never takes out her frustration on me, called me when she was having cramps and stuff, will occasionally take some photos of herself for me.
The photos of her is where I find myself realizing how deep I’ve fallen because this woman is just gorgeous. I legitimately can’t see myself with anybody else but her. Her smile, her hair, her cute glasses, and her entire body is simply STUNNING. Don’t even get me started on personality because that’s what has me so starstruck. I was looking at her photos tonight and man, I wonder how I lived without her for 15 years…
I never run out of things to talk about with her and unlike the past few years, all of her plans seem to include me in them. Driving together, napping together, just being around each other always. I mentioned her being my partner a few times and she gladly accepted that title. I EVEN KNOW WHAT WEDDING RING SHE WANTS. It’s not the look that matters but the engraving, which is the timestamp for Harry’s love confession to Sally in “When Harry Met Sally.”
My relationship/friendship with her is completely unlike the ones where I was actively dating them, I am so completely invested in her life and what’s she doing and what she likes. It’s borderline obsession with loving every aspect of her and the world she sees. My friends are always talking about flirting with girls and all that but as long as my best friend exists, I feel as though I’m taken.
And I know some people would question why I haven’t confessed and that’s because I’m waiting until I can see her face-to-face and know for sure if she loves me back in that way. We say I love you quite a bit but with everything going on between us, I have a feeling that I’ll get my true answer by getting to look into her eyes again. Part of me thinks I’m dreaming all this up and that she truly does see us as just friends but there’s too many coincidences for me to ignore it. We’re too close, I believe. Too close for either of us to enter a relationship with someone else, at least.
Let me know what you guys think.
TL;DR this girl is literal perfection and loves me to bits but I can’t read her mind on if the feelings are romantic. Am I crazy on thinking so from how close she is to me?

I (19M) met my best friend (19F) about 4 years ago during the end of my Freshman Year in High School. In that time, she was dating someone and I was dating someone and eventually, both of our relationships went to crap because of very immature reasons that were common with kids our age. I was afraid to be alone after my break up so I ended up getting closer to her and it got to the point where we began to talk every single day, and that streak hasn’t ended since. I had a feeling about her even during that time but went on to enter a situation-ship that turned into an actual relationship for about a month until that too ended unceremoniously. She was there for all of it and even gave me the confidence to end the relationship with my ex after my ex said that I “wasn’t a priority,” something I’ll never forget. That line hurt like hell after putting so much energy into caring for her.
My second ex, the situation-ship one, would joke around with my feelings afterward and try to talk to me months after our breakup. For context, I told her never to speak to me again after she claimed she loved me then went on to date another guy as reported by my best friend. So this behavior was very detrimental to my mental health and made things a lot worse for me. My best friend however, protected and defended me from her actions. My ex let it slip that she was afraid for my bff to find out we were talking because she had scolded her before.
Eventually, that ended and up until this point, my bff was someone who was scarily similar to me and sorta brought me out of my shell. I changed a lot of my “loner” ways for her and would walk to class with her, not even speaking sometimes, just enjoying her presence. We’d have these little moments between each other and got mistaken for a couple a few times too. She had an affinity towards me but it was nothing romantic.
Fast forward to last year and I’m starting to take notice of some strange feelings for her and through subtle prodding, it was still clear she wasn’t into me in that way. There’d be little clues of something brewing within her heart but not enough to act.
Now this is where it gets interesting. 2024 has probably been our best year yet and the crazy part is that we haven’t seen each other in-person since our mutual friend’s graduation party which was last year. We have plans to travel across the world, live in some apartment together, own a dog together, dress up for halloween as Agnes and Kristofferson from Fantastic Mr. Fox, and a bunch more like me cooking for her and us doing each other’s hair. We text and talk to each other like we’ve been married for 20 years. She’ll tell me when something’s wrong and never takes out her frustration on me, called me when she was having cramps and stuff, will occasionally take some photos of herself for me.
The photos of her is where I find myself realizing how deep I’ve fallen because this woman is just gorgeous. I legitimately can’t see myself with anybody else but her. Her smile, her hair, her cute glasses, and her entire body is simply STUNNING. Don’t even get me started on personality because that’s what has me so starstruck. I was looking at her photos tonight and man, I wonder how I lived without her for 15 years…
I never run out of things to talk about with her and unlike the past few years, all of her plans seem to include me in them. Driving together, napping together, just being around each other always. I mentioned her being my partner a few times and she gladly accepted that title. I EVEN KNOW WHAT WEDDING RING SHE WANTS. It’s not the look that matters but the engraving, which is the timestamp for Harry’s love confession to Sally in “When Harry Met Sally.”
My relationship/friendship with her is completely unlike the ones where I was actively dating them, I am so completely invested in her life and what’s she doing and what she likes. It’s borderline obsession with loving every aspect of her and the world she sees. My friends are always talking about flirting with girls and all that but as long as my best friend exists, I feel as though I’m taken.
And I know some people would question why I haven’t confessed and that’s because I’m waiting until I can see her face-to-face and know for sure if she loves me back in that way. We say I love you quite a bit but with everything going on between us, I have a feeling that I’ll get my true answer by getting to look into her eyes again. Part of me thinks I’m dreaming all this up and that she truly does see us as just friends but there’s too many coincidences for me to ignore it. We’re too close, I believe. Too close for either of us to enter a relationship with someone else, at least.
Let me know what you guys think.
TL;DR this girl is literal perfection and loves me to bits but I can’t read her mind on if the feelings are romantic. Am I crazy on thinking so from how close she is to me?

Okay, so my entire life people have assumed for some reason that I was gay (personal interests like music taste I listen to everything, pop culture, and having primarily female friends). So it made me question myself in high school and wonder if I was but I didn’t really find myself attracted to guys so… I waived that off.
But now I’m older and also in a relationship with a girl I really love and am physically and emotionally attracted to (4 years now). And I’ve also been in other relationships with girls who I’ve had similar feelings for.
I discover that my body insecurities have lead to other curiosities. Seeing men who are more built than me, looking to see what men have bigger dicks than me. And also finding them attractive but never wanting anything physically to do with them.
My curiosity eventually lead to anon chat video sites where at first I didn’t indulge but just looked to see how common a big dick was… then it lead to me jerking off with them. Enjoying be watched and praised. But when it got a little… well gay… I would become uncomfortable and disconnect. And I considered it like a “bro jerk” if that makes sense? Lol I hate that term but yeah. Also would only jerk in front of bigger dicks sometimes.
I still have a strong attraction to women but I find myself being able to place when men are attractive and sometimes when they are in better shape than me or better looking than me wondering if they have big dicks. Is this just me being insecure and also having a weird voyeur kink… or what? This is very confusing because I still have no desire to fuck men or date them… I’ve also had dreams about men (oral primarily) but have never once wanted to fuck one.
This is a very complex phenomenon for me so if you have any questions for clarification please let me know. I feel like I did a poor job at explaining this.
Also should mention: I’m a 25 year old virgin who has done a handful of everything but sex. Just in case that is relevant.

Any and all perspectives help more than you know. I don’t have anybody to really talk about this with so any guidance is appreciated. It’s a lot to read, I might yap but with reason
I’m 19 years old and have just finished my spring semester of college. I went to a big college first out of town, my main financial aid fucked me over so I had to switch at semester to my home state’s university. Anyway, this year was kind of tough for me lost a couple family members & my boyfriend had it rough, lost his best friend and dad within a few months of each other. Then we find out I’m pregnant. I wasn’t sure what I really wanted to do but didn’t get to make a choice, I miscarried sometime later. Shit was hard so I went back to hometown & finished semester online while staying with my boyfriend until I needed to move my stuff out of dorm.
My boyfriend is 19 and we’ve been together a year & a half, but known each other since middle school. We dated in 8 grade until he had to move out of state, he moved back & we started hanging out again. My circle is small & I don’t really make/have any friends but he’s my best friend. Even if we wouldn’t have chose to date after he came back to town, ik we would’ve been good friends. My family liked him or seemed to at least, especially my mom.
It’s well known in my family that my mom and I just don’t get along. She kept me quite literally locked away as the Cinderella child until I left. I could only do things if she wasn’t in a bad mood/something didn’t need cleaned/ a child didn’t need to be picked up/dropped off. My friends in high school never invited me ANYWHERE lmao but after a while I figured out it’s easier to just deal w it rather than push back harder. I didn’t know how to use a crosswalk until I was 14 lmao I was so sheltered sorry ANYWAYS, I turned 18 and it was like I had a brand new mother until her fear of me leaving wore off.
Long story short, the summer before I left for college (last summer) I didn’t have anywhere else to go so I moved in with boyfriend. My mom did the absolute most, almost got me fired from my job & ambulance ended up being called from how much of a tantrum she threw. It was so ridiculous that she refused to tell anybody what happened when people asked because she said it’s too embarrassing for her.
Just like that, she flipped and was saying some terrible stuff about my boyfriend. He had a rough upbringing which she knows some stuff about. She took that and twisted the narrative to make him seem like some sort of charity case that took advantage of her generous & good graces. She calls him the hungry kid who hung out w her daughter. He’s no longer allowed at her house lmao just out of spite. He never said a word to her or about her when she had the worst to say about him, he never was disrespectful or like showed up to the house either idrk what that was for. Even when I moved out & she drained my entire savings I had worked for since I was 15, he never said anything bad about her just that i was going to be okay and he’s gonna help me figure it out. Not only that but she shunned me for a long long time, refused to talk & look at me after I moved out which made me feel incredibly guilty & like I had to compensate so I’d stress out & make sure to see her and my siblings every single day. My little brother is 5 and doesn’t really understand but my mom didn’t try to explain or kid proof it, just let him scream and cry and claw at my legs whenever I’d leave the house to go home.
If you’re still reading thank you sm.
Fast forward to today, I went to college finished my semester and am back in my hometown. Over breaks in college I’ve stayed at my moms cause she expected me to and her & I’s relationship has gotten so much better with distance. Between her and boyfriend, they were my biggest support especially with the miscarriage. But the only conversation they’ve had is when him and I went to talk to my mom in person when I found out I was pregnant. Not sure where she stands with him idrc but I’m sure she probably hates him more since we did technically make her worst fear as a mother come true.
Im living with her again mainly cause I don’t want to be isolated again and i physically cant deal with the debilitating anxiety and guilt every single day, I wanted to try to focus my energy on healing & resting before I start classes here. Boyfriend’s family situation is getting v challenging for him, so he wants to get a place regardless. I really just want my own space where I’m not feeling constantly overstimulated and I miss living with him a lot if honestly. We make the best team & it’s so easy with him. I catch myself getting so excited looking at furniture even from the thrift or cooking meals w him or decorating. I miss him making breakfast for me before I wake up and folding laundry together and grocery shopping. He’s paying 6 months rent in advance so I won’t have to worry about getting enough hours & can enjoy summer and actually rest, both of us independently have a pretty thick cushion to fall back on too just in case. So finances aren’t a problem I think?
My mom isn’t too keen on the idea I think she just doesn’t want me to make the same mistakes she made, which I understand because I was also there when she was left with half of every pair of shoes she owned, I mean he took literally half of everything. Even in the case that we do break up and then I’m stuck with an apartment with my ex and have completely fucked myself over, at least I was able to make my own mistake for the first time and learned from it? I don’t know what to tell my mom or how the conversation should go. I don’t wanna be shunned again but then again I’ve never once been able to just do something and justify it with “it’s my life”. Idk, advice/thoughts/bullshit/opinions please please help. Have a blessed day, thank you. I appreciate your time & input more than you know, I don’t have anybody to bounce ideas around with.

I have always tried to practice dbt but I’m now currently trying to practice it much more deliberately and often. I’m doing this with a workbook and YouTube as for me, this feels much more helpful than with multiple therapists I’ve seen. I also see a therapist but my dbt work is kind of something I like to practice alone.
So my question is, how do you guys stay consistent? I’ve currently got reminders in my room, I am going well on using skills, kinda building my “toolbox” for when disaster strikes, but I fear something will come up and I will go completely off the rails with it.
What has helped you keep consistency when times get really tough?

merko to tough laga thoda bas 30 questions ki surity hai baki k 10 to bas...

Hi guys. Yesterday, I finish my first playthrough of P3 Reload. The ending was very emotional and stuff. Many posts have been made about it. I will keep my bittersweet feeling for myself and I won't do another post about this subject. I have a question regarding the Aegis x Makoto relationship.
In P3R I made the choice to date Yukari Takeba, and until the last scene, I thought, the Yukari x Makoto couple was almost canon because when Makoto fly to the moon to fight Nyx alone, Yukari is the only one who cries.
BUT
The last scene when Makoto dies on Aegis's lap made me rethink that. I kind of regretted not to date Aegis. The Aegis & Makoto love to each other seemed kind of obvious in this scene...
I would like to know if the Makoto x Aegis love relationship was already an option in the original P3, and what couple you feel would be canon (if there was a Canon couple... )

Question lang po. Graduate po ako ng UST. Ngayun anak ko naman ang papasok. Natangap siya sa AMV (proud ako syempre) Nag submit kami ng requirements ng May 8, 2024 sabi e maa-access daw yung studet pds after a few days. More than a week na hindi pa din namin ma-access. Matagal ba talaga? Ibang-iba kasi procedure nung nag enroll ako noon e. Dati pag pasado ka sa USTET bibigay listahan ng requirements at date ng enrollment. Tapos ngayun ang daming procedures. Nag email ako sa admissions ang sabi mag email ako sa AMV, at hindi pa sila sumasagot. Sana may makasagot dito Thank you!
P. S. Nilgay kong "Rant" yung flair kasi required e. Pero nagtatanong lang talaga ako 🤣

https://www.reveddit.com/neoliberal/comments/1csennd/discussion_thread/l44tauj/
Full comment:
I know that this is a contentious topic, but is it really anti-Semitic to ask a Jewish date if they think that there's a genocide going on in Gaza if you believe that that is the case? Like, as a Turkish person, I wouldn't think too much about someone asking me a similar question about the Armenian genocide if they wanted to know me better. Does it cross line when the assumption you make about a person is based on religion instead of nationality?
- IjustwantRESoptions

i 20m work at a papa murphys while going to college, it was november 30 at 2:30 pm and i was supposed to be off at 2 but my unreliable coworker never showed up, which happened quite a bit , no call no show, meaning i had to be there alone in the store until further notice, i saw a sketchy guy outside near a subway and i was gonna lock the door because i had a bad feeling about it but i got distracted with other stuff and before i know it the skecty guy comes in with a gun demanding money and i give the register and he leaves i run to a nearest gas station call the police yada yada
i still work there and i enjoy working there and im one of the best workers but for awhile i have been mentally fucked from this incident, particularly because 1. being robbed was one of my biggest fears and it just SO HAPPENED to happen to me during the BRIEF period i was by myself, ( what luck ) and 2. i wasnt even supposed to be there, it should have been my co worker, not that i want it to happen to anyone but shes middle age recovering drug addict, lived around guns and crime alot and real mentally tough, she would have handled it better than i did, literally in the days after that incident i cut contact with everyone and just kinda drove aimlessly all day and got drunk or high every night to just get it out of my mind yeah my GPA for the rest of the semester dropped a decent amount yeah every day i was pretty fucked up from that
but i still work there and i get lots of hours and i genuienely enjoy it but idk i just have tried to forget it even happened but back to the original question have you or any of your coworkers experienced anything like this?

This is my first time posting so I’m sorry if it doesn’t make much sense or I’m trauma dumping a lot also a couple trigger warnings, I’m not sure where to start off with. Me and my mom used to be pretty close I’d say up until I started high school. Middle of eighth grade I moved to a new city so I was back to trying to find some friends. I’ve been moving around since I could remember, I used to live in Germany where I moved twice, then moved to the US around the Silicon Valley, moved again, and again and again now we’re here. I wouldn’t be explaining this part of my life if I felt like it didn’t have any weight in this situation. Middle school I found a friend, me and her got pretty close, stuck through Covid together. My mom hated her and not even two years into our friendship my mom started accusing her of stealing from us, being a bad influence and overall just being trashy. Her parents were in the middle of getting a divorce and she had a lot of things going on in her life. I dyed my hair red during this time too while being friends with her, she probably was a huge influence on me but that’s also because it was covid and I was bored and who doesn’t start irrationally bleaching and coloring their hair at 14. I think my mom thought she was a bad influence on that part too because she's the one that first started off coloring her hair like purple and pink etc. My mom never of course said anything to my friend but she made sure I would hear of her disapproval concerning her bad influence in my life. I stopped being friends with her freshman year since my parents banned me from having her over or going to her house, I couldn’t drive neither could she and hanging out at each other's houses was pretty much what we did 80% of the time. I was so frustrated and felt trapped because the only friend I really cared about was someone I wasn’t allowed to associate with anymore. I told her I was done being friends with her over text and blamed it on me just being in a dark place and breaking it off. She was confused and called me a week later about something personal but I just dismissed it. Granted there were other things going on in our friendship but I felt terrible about it especially since her parents were going through that divorce and I just left during such a sensitive time. I hate to admit it but I felt so much better since I started making new friends quickly and started sitting with a new group the next day. Mostly guys and other two girls, it worked out fine for the next year. Junior year my grades started dropping so my parents got stricter, started taking my phone, looking through it, screen time etc. I felt like it was a huge invasion of privacy since my mom would look through my texts. Me and my mom also started arguing weekly about whatever it was but when I mean arguing I mean like full on yelling for two hours down in the living room with no stopping. I can’t do anything about it because whenever I say something remotely disproving her so called “facts'' since she always speaks with so much authority on subjects she wouldn’t even know about I’m the one that has to quiet down from my fathers perspective, and I know this will be mostly about my mom but me and my dad have always been close even when we’re fighting within a week we at least make it up. We play the same sports, have the same humor etc. I understand this might look like us disregarding my mom and I know she cares and loves me yet in certain circumstances she doesn’t show it so of course there’s going to be reasons as to why I’m closer with my dad than her. For example I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes in 4th grade and of course I wouldn’t expect anyone to know that when you're low you need carbs or when your blood sugar is high you need insulin but my mom to this day still does not understand it. I wouldn’t care even if it’s my friend but as my mom you take so much authority over my life and who I can’t or can hangout with but you don’t know the basics of how I have to manage my life behind closed doors in the house that you and I live in every day. That might sound overdramatic but it’s just something I think about. Also growing up, I’m an only child by the way, I would always play by myself whenever we went on vacation for example to the beach etc. it was always my dad that came and played with me in the sand while at sharing his time with me and my mom so my mom wouldn’t gets upset over him leaving her to go play with me. Even now I notice how my mom would always make snarky comments regarding how my dad always treats me like a princess and cares too much over me. Anywho, since I know this is getting pretty long I’ll try to sum it up a bit more. I started liking one of the guys from that group, I would text him on a daily basis just about whatever. We were pretty awkward in person since I’ve never really talked to that many guys and I don’t think he really had much experience either so we stuck it to mostly phones, everyone else in the group also didn’t know. Once my mom went through my phone on one occasion that night, because she would collect it on some nights and read through my messages in bed she saw one message from that guy calling my mom bipolar and me responding with something like it’s fine like I still love her she freaked out. She told me to never talk to him again and that I’m a brat for talking about my family issues outside of the family etc. I honestly had nobody to talk to. The other two girls in the group didn’t really talk to me at this time, I later became really close with one of them though more on that later and I had no other friends in that town so it was really only him. He had a plethora of family issues that I couldn’t even imagine so I felt like he understood where I was coming from at times better than other kids with American parents. Not sure I mentioned but my parents were both born in Eastern Europe and grew up during heavy communism so that definitely affected them and their parenting style. Anywho, my mom sent me a paragraph to show to him, basically telling him to never talk to me again and that he has to apologize to her etc. After a couple months I think he took me out on a date. I'm not sure what to make of it since it was pretty casual. We just got ice cream. I told my parents that he was only picking me up so we could meet with the rest of the group when of course we’re not. The rest of the guys saw us downtown and found out about it. That kinda really sucked since I’m pretty sure one of them liked me so he got really mad and it kind of ruined the group dynamic. The guy I liked stopped talking to me a couple months in since I couldn’t really do much or go anywhere and dating as a result would be hard so he stopped really talking to me it was pretty off and on since I would get mad stop texting him and then he would try to get back texting at me and once I showed him I cared he’d stop. I was so mad at him and the situation that I refrained myself from talking to him, two weeks later he killed himself. I found out because one of the guys from the group faced me and told me. I went downstairs and started crying and formed the sentences explaining it the best I could, pushing a couple words out at a time. In that very moment I felt so hurt and vulnerable by what just happened my mom responded by just looking at me and saying that he had it coming for him since he probably vaped and drank. My dad ran downstairs since he probably heard me crying and the first thing he did without asking me any questions was hug me. For the first time ever he told my mom to shut up since her trying to ask me questions about how he died just made me sob harder. Over the next week my mom was pretty lenient about letting me go out. The next week she started asking what happened to him. Me and my mom were not close at all anymore at this time. You see mothers and daughters talking about guys or what dress they’re gonna wear to the prom etc in the movies. Me and my mom are not like that. On top of that I was overwhelmed with what happened and as someone does overthinking how things could have played out differently. Anyway I refused to tell her anything saying I was too uncomfortable and over the course of the next couple months of senior year she would get progressively mad and irritated at me to the point of arguing and yelling at me for not trusting her and telling her how he killed himself. I to this day told her nothing but she stopped asking. I don’t know how my dad feeds into this since he’s always so Switzerland about everything when I know I’m right in an argument between me and my mom, however when my mom has leverage he takes her side. Anyway, the beginning of senior year was rough. I hated being in that house and really started seriously considering the only options I felt like I had at the time. I started becoming closer to that one girl from the group earlier, spoiler alert my mom strongly dislikes her now too since she’s a liar and since she’s close with her mom but not her dad that means her parents are having marital issues and therefore her mom is a cheater etc. I don’t understand how she goes from one topic to another and sorts these things into her head. She’s my only friend that I’m really close with and I have been for the past these almost two so hearing this is very disheartening since I’m sending off senior year and I can’t do this again being so close to the end of the year. I forgot to mention but during homecoming I drank for the first time and I had one of my guy friends with his girlfriend and that friend that I’m not friends with drop me off. When he dropped me off he didn’t wave to my mom so she now thinks he’s a bastard in her words and disgusting and she deserves and apology for all the times he’s been over to my house etc. which I honestly think is insane because how do you always have so many issues over my friends and why are you so obsessed with 16 year olds, like you really have beef with high school kids as a 50 year old. Anyway the reason I bring that up is because I invited him over a couple weeks ago for some drills to help one of my other friends with mma since me and him used to wrestle and my mom got mad despite him not being there for me but for my other friends benefit. I’m not sure if this makes any sense. I'm trying to explain the issue best I can without saying too much. Anyway my friend, the one that I’m friends with now, the girl and that guy from the group that didn’t wave at my mom are both Latin so my mom started calling them cheaters and dirty etc when they had nothing to do with anything. This argument spiraled over me asking my mom if I can have a sleepover with those friends since we want to bring a new series on Netflix. Also during prom I asked my parents for 10 dollars since I already had twenty in my account and I wanted to buy hair stuff for prom. They gave me the 10 and I said how I was going to catch a ride with friend A so that when friend A picked me up but friend B that I did not mention in the plan picked me up my parents started calling and texting me. To give some background friend B has been close with me since freshman year, probably the only friend my mom has liked and also the only white friend I have not sure if that has anything do with it but there’s that. She’s really sweet and has been invited over multiple times to my house by my parents, they do really like her. Anywho yet since I didn’t mention that friend B was driving the car since my parents didn’t recognize the new car and knew it wasn’t friend A driving yet assumed it was indeed friend B but since I didn’t mention that they took all the money I had in my account which was only 30 dollars but it was what I needed to get my nails and hair gloss and hair spray for prom, I just started breaking down in the middle of target. I was so excited to get my stick on nails etc since I couldn’t afford to get the acrylics since I was paying for all my prom stuff for the most part. By the way I know that the 10 dollars was initially there so I understand taking away that but the other 20 I made selling my clothes on mercari and I had nothing else like no other cash nothing that was the money I worked on to get my prom stuff. It was mostly my dad actually that got mad at this point taking my money etc and than following a got a text from my mom saying I got what I was coming for by acting the way I have been. There were 3 others with me while I was at target so having three of my friends see me breakdown from me only having 14 cents left in my account was so humiliating. I ended up looking great at prom neither less so don’t even worry about that, my hair looked great and I found some old stick-ons in my laundry room and painted them white lol a couple of them popped off during prom but whatever. This has been really long and thanks to whoever spent their time reading through all of this I’m sorry if the read is a bit of a struggle but I just don’t know what to think or do of this situation. Keep in mind I’m 18 now, never have had a boyfriend, never have do anything, kissed, even held hands romantically etc. it’s one thing you know to not care about any of that but the thing is I do and I want to experience being a teenager and going out and going on dates and not worry about my mom flipping out on one of my friends. While we were in Italy one of the tour guys told her to move on the bus to make more room for others and she started cussing him out telling him to f himself etc for telling her a paying customer where to sit. Everyone started staring at us. I did not want to be there. I just kept my head down the entire time and didn’t really talk to my mom out of embarrassment for the next two days. Also after that prom incident I wasn’t allowed to go anywhere after as a result of go to friend B's birthday bash the next day so my mom texted her without my knowledge and told her not to tell me about how I’ve been acting up and one day I’ll learn when I’m her age but it will be too late and that I don’t know what I’m doing and finishing off my apologizing on my part for my behavior and I’m the reason why I can’t go to her party. Which I find so infuriating because one of the main reasons why I don’t tell my mom anything about my personal life is because I simply don’t want her to have that control of knowing what my life is like, I probably tell the teacher I TA for more than my own biological mother. The fact that she preached family issues in the family so heavily and that you should never talk about issues to others yet goes behind my back and tells my friend that my indecent behavior is the reason why I can’t go is so beyond me because where did your ideals go that you preached so heavily about. Every time I’m around my mom especially when she has her flares of anger I just start shaking like you know when you drink something with a lot of caffeine in the morning and you don’t eat anything so mid way through the day you just start getting jittery and anxious, kind of like that. Ok I think I’m done anyway thank you for tuning in cause I really have to start studying for human geo, thanks for reading up until here 🙂.

i (23F) recently started going to therapy and originally it was for depression and anxiety. i’m a college student and these last two semesters have quite literally dragged me down mentally until my brain just felt paralyzed and i almost failed both semesters.
i went to a therapist/counselor on campus and she brought up ADD based on all that i disclosed about my experience in college and how i felt lazy and yet i cannot bring myself to do my assignments until i have to force myself on the due date. i didn’t take her ADD statement as a diagnosis but i did keep it in the back of my mind. i’m a psych major so i’ve learned bits and pieces of ADD/ADHD. as much as i identified with the symptoms i could find in my textbook, i didn’t want to self-diagnose and ultimately dropped the subject.
a few weeks after that, i was becoming increasingly frustrated and just said f*ck it and booked an appointment with a therapist under my insurance. i didn’t bring up the ADD i just answered his questions. technically, i am clinically depressed but he also brought up the possibility of ADHD. i was hesitant to accept what he was telling me until he explained that ADHD doesn’t “develop”, instead it’s “in us from the beginning”.
currently i am looking for a permanent therapist so i can look into being tested for ADHD but i don’t know how to ask or what to say.
how do i go to a therapist and explain i may have ADHD without sounding like i’m begging for medication?

I am 20. Just broke up after a month of dating because we figured it wouldn't last 2.5 months apart after barely a month together if I wasn't as emotionally invested in it than she was. I was still testing the waters.
It's been 2 weeks, I miss being in a relationship. I am usually fine but when I'm completely unoccupied or I someone asks me why i broke up, I start questioning the breakup, if i could've made it last and if deciding to rely on my gut and what I said under pressure was right or not.
Men, how do you deal with this ?

This is my first time ever posting anything like this so I apologize in advanced if this is hard to follow. I have expressed through the roughly 3 years (I say that because my partner and I don't quite remember when we started dating exactly so we made up a date) that him and I were dating before he proposed that I wasn't comfortable being married due to the marriages I have been around in my family never have worked out and other baggage I have like that. He proposed to me on Christmas eve at his family's home. He didn't tell me or his family he was going to do that. He has a history of not planning and doing things impulsively then getting depressed when it doesn't work out. I love him to death so I said yes but I really didn't want to. Not because I don't love him, he's my rock, but because I just didn't want that for myself yet. It felt like he was only doing what he wanted. And it felt like he just wanted to make sure I wouldn't leave him. He's expressed a lot that he's very insecure which is another reason I said yes. I feel like if I said no that would be bad for our relationship and that's the last thing I want. I don't want to bring this up because I feel like he'll have doubt in our relationship or that he'll get depressed. The reason I would bring it up is because it's causing me turmoil at this moment. Last week we got into a fight. Hes a super jealous person and he doesn't like it when I even talk to someone that isn't him that I get along with. Which is why I have a hard time making friends. I'm scared of him being upset and ignoring me or something. He always is scared that I'm cheating even though I'm talking to him 24/7 and we have life 360 (a location app) and he sees where I'm going every day. The fight started because I went out to drinks with my co workers and he got jealous of that. He got mad at me and started to reply with one word replies. Then I confronted him and he just said "it's a me problem just go out and drink" (he's saying it's his own problem not for me to do anything about). That escalated fast into an argument, mainly from me, because I got tired of him being so jealous. It was the final straw. I never have been mad at him openly to him like that. I feel so tied down in a bad way and because I have never brought anything up to him I feel bad. I grew up in a very volatile home. I grew up walking on egg shells never talking back so me expressing I was upset was very scary for me. It's been a bit Over a week and I'm still mad about it but I've been trying to get over it. It's like all the bad feelings I've had since getting engaged suddenly are rising in me. He said (I'm paraphrasing in the least bais way I can because it was a long argument) that if he had it his way I would be locked away with only him forever and that he knows he's too jealous and that it's because of his previous relationship because she cheated on him. I said that's toxic and I don't like that and I started to raise my voice (this is over the phone) while explaining why that's toxic af. Because of that he said that it's the beer talking, referring to my voice rising. I only had 1 beer and the adrenaline of sharing my dislike to his jealously would have sobered me up regardless. He says he'll work on it but he's said that about other times I have brought things up to him but he never does, which I know is unfair to say because he could be working on it behind the scenes when I'm not around and working mentally, but it has never been present, that I've noticed, that he's worked on anything. I don't think he'll be working on this either. How this relates to my question is, do I bring up how I feel like I am being tied down in a bad way? And that I didn't really want to get engaged and that I said yes to make him happy? I don't want to hurt him though that might be inevitable due to some of his insecurities. We've been engaged 1 year now and I am afraid that I have waited too long to bring this up and since I hid my feelings I feel like it's unreasonable to say this too. I feel like it's my principles that are now broken due to this. I feel like he didn't respect them and only went for his feelings. The jealousy, me stepping on egg shells, and proposing without considering my principles and feelings is baring on me greatly. I don't know how to express that I don't feel good with how things are.
Tl Dr My partner proposed and I said yes to make him happy though I told him I didn't want to get married throughout the years of us dating previous. I feel tied down and anxious about being engaged but I don't want to hurt him. Do I tell him this or deal with it until I get used to it?

When it comes to dating, I've had a handful of really good relationships and a handful of meh to toxic relationships.
But in all of them, I settled for women where I really loved their personality, but not necessarily their body type.
None of them were unattractive to me, just simply not as aligned with my ideal type as I would like
I settled down in each case because we got along great or had a lot in common and I didn't want to seem shallow or unrealistic by turning them down just because their body wasn't my ideal. I was definitely still attracted enough to each person to make it work
But in each case I felt my eyes wandering because I knew there were women out there with the body type I truly desired most. I never broke up with anyone or cheated because of this, it was always other issues
The body type that I like is certainly out there, I see it a few times every day. It's nothing extremely unrealistic or edited. But I have no clue if those folks would be compatible with me on a deeper level
It just seems crazy to think that someone could align with my values / interests etc and also be physically ideal (to me) all at once
I just feel like if I'm going to be monogamous for the rest of my life, it has to be with someone I'm ridiculously attracted to. Maybe that's selfish of me, but it feels true. That's part of why monogamy has been so hard for me
I'm just tired of having wandering eyes because I always settle for people I am less physically attracted to, based on the other positive aspects of their personality
Right now a few very sweet girls are interested in me, who I know would make good partners. But again they aren't my preferred body type and I don't want to lead them on just to have this issue once again in the future
I know nobody will be ever perfect and bodies change over time, but is it wrong of me to really prioritize my favored body type the next time I date?
TL;DR
I like a specific body type but I always date people outside of my type as long as they have good personalities and common interests
This leads me to always have wandering eyes because I know I "settled" when people I'm more attracted to are out there
But that begs the question of how many people are both my preferred type AND have compatible personalities
I worry I'm being too selfish or that the percentage is unrealistically low

Are there any apps, free or paid, with a straightforward enough UI to the degree that even someone not that technologically inclined can maneuver it with ease - whilst it's also actually able to retrieve files from selected folders to sort them into separate folders for each file format?
Trying to sort out an insanely cluttered MacBook with no folder system, as well as some external HDDs with the same issue. Been searching around but every app I have come across so far seem to either need more detail-oriented instructions input by me than I have time for, or they just straight up doesn't sort anything at all.
Closest I feel I've come to finding what I'm looking for is an app called "Shade", but I didn't manage to move all the files in the list it returned of, for example, .jpg files.
Might be a dumb question, but genuinely not that up to date on the kind of indie apps that aren't available through the official App Store.

My boyfriend and I are both 30. We met last year, Aug30 and dated for months and became official on January 1st. A little background lang, I live alone in a condo and he visits me daily when we were just dating pa until we became official. So, last year when we were just dating pa(not official) I clearly remember this day when he visited me at my place, it was the coronation day of Miss Universe yung nanalo si Ms. Nicaragua. So I borrowed his ipad kasi I can put it at the table kasi may stand instead of phone na hinahawakan lang tapos that time I was watching live sa Fb, so i sent the link from my phone to his messenger so I can just watch it directly sa ipad. While I was watching sa ipad nya hindi kasi naka full screen. Na noticed ko lang sa right side parang may suggested na mga profile like except from his mom and dad’s profile meron then 1 person dun always suggested which is si (ex) pala kasi like sa right side ng screen parang like recommended talaga yung profile like( “ex commented to, ex like..”) yung mga ganyan. That was the day I found out na ex nya pala yun. Kasi pansin ko din si fb kung sino ang profile na vinisit mo palagi mag aapear talaga sya mostly sa profile mo like “yung shortcut”.. Out of curiosity, i visited her profile and saw that she’s already in a relationship, and I knew the guy from a previous company. So, mas na curious pa ako then when you try to search kasi sa fb makikita mo history sa “recent searches, visits” at that time nakita ko na my bf still visits his ex’s profile once i a while maybe 3-5x since the day we started seeing. I just told him after ng Ms. U, na “I think I know na sino ex mo, is it (name) noh? He didn’t deny naman and just ask n how did i know, and i just casually said na because sa fb mo sya ang top suggested profile together with your mom and dad, meaning you always visit their profile, that’s it. I didn’t ask anything na.
Then maybe a month or so, we were open to giving access to our phones. One day, while I was browsing some photos, android kasi phone nya so medyo daming albums, meron like “google photos”, so when I went to click it, meron dun another gmail account with more photos, so while I was scrolling, i saw a photos of them, and when I returned the phone I intentionally left it to the photos and did not bother to exit so para when he open he would know that I saw the photos. I did not confront him or anything just waited for him to say something pero wala. Then a few days after I went to check the photos again, the other account was logged out na. I asked him, bakit na logout yung ibang account and he said wala daw sya ginalaw at wala nman daw ibang acct, i told him anong wala nakita ko pa nga photos nyo ng ex mo sa acct na yun sabi nya hindi naman nya ni logout. So ayun, i just dismissed it.
Fast forward, we rarely check each other’s phones na. We had disagreements, away bati in our relationship just like a normal couple but never this. So just this Monday may 13th. I decided to check his gallery. I saw some retrieved old google photos na sa album nya. So I when checked the account I saw the other account na login na ulit, so I opened it and saw their photos again. So while he was lying down, even though I feel hurt na and medyo nag shake na hands ko I calmly said , wow “grabi yung glowup ng ex mo ngayon, like ang layo2 before grabi sobrang puti na” Pero without looking up, he said “yeah, because at that time dami nyang nilalagay sa face nya kaya daming sugat2. Like, hello is that the right thing to say to your gf? Instead of saying, sorry hindi ko pala na delete yung photos because this or that or why i I decided to keep it. He also insisted he didn’t see the photos and I was like how come you knew exactly which photos I was referring, also yan nga una nag aapear eh when you opened that account. I continued to browse the photos and he was looking as if proud na proud pa. He let me continued making side comments and until I saw video nya he was calling her ex their endearment. Then I said, “sus gusto nya palang endearment ****, ako ang dami ko ng sinuggest like baby, babe, love to the point na ginawa ko ng friend, bro and brader, kaya ayaw iba pala ang gusto, kaya pala hanggang first name basis pa rin tayo. Sana all, pati sa mga photos nyo ikaw mismo nag tatake directly pero tayo ni walang halos photos, buti nlang talaga hindi ko din pinipilit mag take tayo ng photos” tapos defend pa saying hindi naman ako ang gusto ng tawagan sya naman” I got annoyed and added more side comments saying na maybe ganyan talaga pag nasa tamang tao, mas nag go-glow naalagan natin ang selves natin, baka cgro we both look stress because we’re not at the right partner. Kaya siguro palagi mo vinisit ang profile ng ex mo kasi di kapa naka move on or maybe ng hihiniyang ka because she’s so happy with her partner now, traveling together.. Between, our argument he said “do you know when was that(referring to the photos) and what we’ve been through?”, “I don’t care about them kung anong gingawa nila and he keep shouting at this point, I’m trying to remain calm because nakakahiya sa neighbors ko kaya even if want to shout back I can’t, instead I sinabi wag ka mag scandalo dito, hindi mo ito place, hinaan mo boses mo”.. He calmed and took his phone put of my hand and deleted the photos. When he did, sinabi ko oh bakit mo dinelete nayiha kapa, kanini proud na proud kapa. He just stood and left. I went to msg him and showed him a screen recording of deleting all our photos and said this how easy to delete photos, it’s less than 1 minute and he should delete our photos too. I also told him that we need to talk in the morning . I have so many questions. He said he’ got diarrhea so we video call, and it turned to argument again, he said shouted at me and cursed me a lot like big time! I never had a partner who cursed me before so i felt attacked and very disrespected like i never expected that it would come from a partner, haven’t heard from him not even sorry. So yesteday, I messaged him saying “Was it worth it? Worth it ba yung pag shout and pag cursed mo sakin over your past? Not even sorry or proper explanation. Ito pala gusto mo style disrespectful and bastos. Then I’ll give it back to you” right after sending the message I blocked him.
Did I overeact or valid yung ginawa ko? Sa true lang gusto ko gumanti ng insults and hurtful words, pero na realized ko na sayang sa oras but if he ever come to my place, feel ko, makapagbibitaw din talaga ako ng insults

Few days ago my gf asked me to open our relationship just for go out and maybe kiss other people, (she remarks that any sexual thing wouldn't be able to be done, just kisses and dates with persons that we likes). I have a monogamous mind so I don't get it. We have a conversation, that I started with:

• I'm trying to understand why you will choose someone that it's not me to date.
• I will always choose you, I love you, even if I kiss other person, that doesn't make any difference in the fact that I love you and I want to hold your hand for ever.
• But, if you kiss an other one or hold a hand that it's not mine you are choosing other lips to kiss and other hand to hold.
• That's not how it works.
• Will you want to kiss me when you kiss other people
• Yes I will
• So,why will you kiss other people, if you want to kiss me, then kiss me, not other people.
• You said you will always choose me, right?
• Yes I will.
• But if you choose to date other person, not me, you will choose that person, so on, you will be not choosing me.
• But I still choosing you.
• I don't get it.

And I don't really get it, we decided to give it a try but questions like these are freaking me out, and I really what to understand (srry for the bad English, I'm not native).