We are pregnant with #2 due September We are wanting to move house to be closer to family for support
There may be a potential buyer. All cash. Wants us out by mid August as they are coming to the end of their rental
I suggested moving to our parents for a bit if we dont find a chain free house or contracts take longer.
BUT then remembered we have a dog. One my mum is allergic to. So we would have to stay at my in laws
My in laws aren't bad or monstrous or anything. They live 15-20 minutes from my parents. But since having my son they have become very grabby. Always wanting to hold him even if he wants to go and play. Reaches out their hands to take him from me so I can "rest". I dont fully trust them with feeding and they just hold him and sit watching overstimulating TV They brought him a cake on his birthday (depsite us saying not to) and personalised it saying its from them. Brought loads of decorations for it as well. My partner said its because his sister is useless organising and his mum has always done it for friends and family
I could always go with my son alone or even have a night here and there where my partner comes with to stay the night at my parents. Just means the dog will still be at in laws....
What would you do?
Alternatively it would be waiting for another buyer and we been on market for 8 weeks already. And would mean potentially moving with a newborn....

I am a rising senior in college planning on taking a gap year. This summer my main focus is studying for the MCAT which I plan on taking in August. I wanted some suggestions as to what I can focus on to make my application stronger. I want to accumulate more shadowing hours but I am conflicted as to whether I should try to obtain more research experience or continue with my clinical work. Please let me know if you have any suggestions :)

1. Shadowing (8 hours)
2. Dr. ***, Dr… (combine) - 8 hours
3. Clinical (500+ hours)
4. PCA at Cancer Institute - 475 hours
5. Hospital volunteer - 40 hours
6. Non-clinical (70 hours)
7. Book Pals volunteer - 10 hours
8. Ronald Mcdonald volunteer - 20 hours
9. Semester of Service - 50 hours
10. Leadership (100+ hours)
11. President and Chapter Founder
12. Tridelta chair of philanthropy St. Judes
13. Research (300 hours)
14. Wet Lab Lab Research Associate - 70 hours
15. Clinical Lab Research Associate - 230 hours ( no posters/publications )
16. Paid Work (500 Hours)
17. Nanny/ babysitter - 500 hours

Chapter 1: the event
It was the fall of my intern year as I bean my off service trauma rotation. This month was ubiquitously notorious for being the most labor intrusive and least productive rotaion of our emergency medicine program. Knowing this I entered with the intention of simply surviving the month.
Another intern and I let’s call them A for sake of ambiguity, we’re the first emergency medicine residents to roste on the trauma services that year. A shaky start would be an understatement. In the words of chance the raper “like my grama with the Parkinson’s playing operation.” Would better describe it. Medically we did well. We were very competent and completed our work daily, but communication and coordination was non existent. Our Cheifs had informed us that Tuesday was our day of and the Trauma cheif residents had minimum communication with us, or our Cheifs as it seams when A and I did not report on Tuesday they sternly made their dissatisfaction known.
I have struggled with insomnia sense the age of 10. Had 2 sleep studies by this point in my life and been prescribed nearly every sleeping aid on the market. The 80-94 hr work weeks of our trauma rotaion only worsened my insomnia. My lack of sleep likely contributed to a less than prime adaptive immune system and 2 days out of my trauma rotaion I contracted strep like symptoms with associated nausea, requiring me to call for a sick day the next day. No the first day that I felt too ill to work. I was not fully aware of the reporting process. I reported to my Chiefs, but I did not believe I could come to work tomorrow with amble time and notice, however I was somewhat delayed in letting their Cheifs know, because the surgical chiefs rotated every few days and I did not know who my was going to be the next day. The second day which I had to call out sick I was able to locate the cheif for the next day and reprot according to our university’s protocol, which requires that if a resident feels they are not fit for work they must not come in and the university must have staff coverage without any fear or implementation of punitive actions.
I had finally survived to the last week of my trauma rotaion and I could see the light at the end of the tunnel. What I could not see was the pile of stress, shitty diet, lack of mental well ness and sleep deprivation which I was pushing down to reach the light. By this time I had seen a psychiatrist regularly for sleep medication. I had mentioned to him that I had been experiencing more stressed lately and feel that I might be depressed. he reassured me that it was likely only due to my circumstances, given the difficulty of the trauma rotation and wish to reassess once the rotation was over. Looking back I had to fill the habit of drinking more than I usually do. My only on nights before I have days off became 1-2 beers every other night. All of this repressed unhealthy shit finally pushed bad on September 23rd. That night I was at work even later than usual, I stayed up later than usual and couldn’t seem to fall asleep. With the stress of only having minimal sleep and knowing I only had 2 more days of trauma left, I took an extra dose of my sleeping medication.
I opened my eyes to the fighting sight of sun beaming in my window and I instantly knew I was late. (Sense I hadn’t seen the sun in a month) . Due to my need for scrupulous sleep hygiene I have been sleeping with my phone of and away for me. I rushed to grab it and watched as the little Apple logo seamed to glow on the screen for an eternity. Then in conjunction with its fading I saw 3 missed calls from my director, a text from college A and 2 missed calls from the surgical director. Still, I was able to calm myself, knowing that resident A had been late to this rotation by a few hours 2 other days and nothing came of it. I called my director back and he asked me to report to his office where I was greeted by my director, my coordinator and another emergency medicine facility.
With the only explanation of: “we just want you to get better”, I was handed a letter, to my relief it did not entail my termination, but a declaration of administrative leave and a requirement to undergo an evaluation at a well known university in Florida.
Lake any other savvy millennial, I did my research. By research I mean numerous google searches and screeches thru the depts of redit. To my dismay I discovered that in order for a residency program to fire you, they must first initiate an administrative suspension. I would soon find out however, being terminated would have been a delightful outcome compared to what ensued.
I spend the next few weeks in the wallos of regret and depression. I indulged in higher qualities of alchohol then I ever have before. I all but ceased communing with peers, and abruptly stoped any physical activity I had once enjoyed. Frightened as I was I was ensured, it will be ok “we just want you to get better”
Chapter 2 The evaluation : guilty until proven innocent I did exactly as instructed and scheduled an evaluation, I supposed that this was either a mental evaluation to assess if I’m fit for work with plans of termination or it actually was an evaluation to better treat my insomnia. To this day I regret my ignorance, and wish I had researched the process more. The Hindi / sand-skrt idea of Hamsa 🪬 is that in order to do any good you must have full knowledge or else good intentions can result in harm. I truely believe my director had good intentions, however but him and I did not have full knowledge of the nature of this evaluation.
Looking back see how easily I could have avoided my troubles by asserting legal aid at this point or even by researching this evaluation process more in depth. If one searches impaired practitioner program which I now know this evaluator works for, the search entire will populate 5 or 6 layferms along side their home website and there is a valid reason for this.
If one every finds themself in this process I employ you to bring a DSM to your evaluation or at least be familiar with the most common use disorders in the DSM-5, because your evaluation will turn into a dance of questions where the evaluator attempts to trap you in a round about way to stating something that may qualify for one of the diagnosis. I have provided an image from the DSM-5 below outlining AUD, which the evaluator concluded that I had the most severe from:
Image
Example***** Here are 10 examples of how he fraudulently assessed me taken directly from his assessment note.

1. Evaluator: Have you ever stoped drinking in the last year.

Me: yes I stoped every week day, I was only drinking on the weekends, until two weeks ago.
-Evaluator uses stoping and starting every week to qualify for 2 or more unsuccessful attempts to stop in the last year “There is a persistent desire or unsuccessful efforts to cut down or control alcohol use.”

1. Evaluator Have you ever had withdrawal symptoms

Me no
Evaluator Well Have you ever had a hangover? You know that’s a from of acute withdrawal
Me: yes in college, I had a few but that was years ago and I’m pretty sure the pathophysiology is different.
Evaluator uses this to count for withdrawal symptoms even tho is was more than a year ago

1. Evaluator: Have you even taken your sleeping medication on a day or night which you drank? Me: Yes, I took my prescriptions are prescribed but I never drank close to bed

Evaluator: qualified this as dangerous behavior with alcohol (where the DSM gives examples such as unprotected sex and drunk driving). The sleeping medication I was on is not a benzodiazepine therefore it is not deadly with alcohol. I personally have seen many patients in the ED who have taken their entire bottle of the medication and drank copious amounts, we just monitor them over night and rehydrate them

1. Evaluator Has anyone told you you drink to much or been worried about you Me: No I drink much less than my friends

Evaluator what about your girlfriend? Me: well she actually doesn’t drink at all she doesn’t like it. She often buys me beer for The Weeknd’s tho. One time we went to a movie and she got a little irritated because I waited for beer then complained about them not having any craft beer. So she said, “you couldn’t have just said no” and drank something else. However, she apologized after and said it’s worth waiting if it’s my only day off.
Evaluator said this qualifies for continued drinking despite causing significant relation consequences, ie divorce.

1. Evaluator : you have sleep issues I hear, and your chart says you’ve had depression in the past, don’t you know that alcohol can effect your sleep and mood Me: yes that’s why I never drink within 3 hours of sleep.

Evaluator but you knew this and still drank
Evaluator: qualifies for drinking despite unwanted physical or psychological effects (this should be recurring to effects the alcohol is causing, I have had insomnia sense the age of 10 long before I took my first sip)
7 evaluator you were late for work and told my you had a drink the day before
Me: Yes but I was late because I didn’t sleep and took double my sleeping meds, I will never do that again
Qualifies for 2 significant work or school issues in the past year ( a therapist and other psychologist ensured me that being late on or a few days doesn’t count they typically are getting fired or failing) ( moreover, this would assume I was late do to drinking it’s self and also assume if happened more than once)

1. • Alcohol is often taken in larger amounts or over a longer period than was intended

He never once asked anything related to this question yet said I qualified in his final report 9. A great deal of time is spent in activities necessary to obtain alcohol, use alcohol, or recover from its effects. The evaluators logic here was sense I was late for work and I had 2 beers the day before I must be taking long to recover from it (this is assuming I missed due to alcohol)

1. Tolerance drinking more to require the same effect: this he checked as true in his final note however it was never even discussed in our evaluation. I did mention to him that I’ve been drinking more than I had earlier in the year frequency wise, but they said nothing to do with quantity or needing more.
   
2. Wanting to drink so bad you can not think of anything else: this is the only qualification of SAUD my evaluator said I did not have.
   

Moreover, without legal help I was not aware that I could obtain a second evaluation or even oppose going to get evaluated at all, but that wouldn’t have mattered seeing I still thought this was for my health and wellbeing as seen when I was asked why do you think you are here to today, to which I replayed “so that I can be evaluated to see what is needed to get back to work”.
To maks the ordeal more infuriating the evaluator continues to ingratiate himself and lie through the process telling you, “it will be fine as long as you are 100% honest”, “anything you say in here is between you and me” or “you slipped up once with your meds, I know your residnecy program they will probably just want a few more out patient tests”
Two weeks later I received a phone call right before I left for an out of state vacation to visit my nice for her birthday. During the call I was informed that I would be required to complete a partial hospitalization program (PHP) lasting “6-10 weeks” which would coast from 15-50 grand not including doctor visits or housing which is billed separately. I suppressed this inconvenience, enjoyed my vocation and reported when I returned, knowing that I must complete this soon so I may return to work with due to the fact that my payed time off would soon be diminished. At this time I had not yet heard of the organization PRN.
Chapter 3 Guilty till proven innocent: The diagnosis
Shell shocked I arrived to a in patient psychiatric unit and was rapidly cleared to progress to treatment without detoxification. During my 90 day of forced rehabilitation I met a few other individuals who were unjustly and fraudulently forced into treatment. I began to look up to one of these such members of the men’s community, who I will refer to as patient X for ambiguity sake.
Unlike me patient X did have alcohol use disorder. He spent many clinic days drinking to avoid alcoholic withdraws. The curious component of his story is that he admitted his depravity, saught help and through his own journey became sober. The bodies at be, namely his local physician, Health monitoring program, rejected his personal path to sobriety and forced him to undergo 90 days of in patient treatment before he could practice medicine again. When he checked in to rehab he had been sober for over a year.
Ask for Stories of people from online
As for me I spend many sleepless nights pondering how consuming a legal substance in a moderate amount could throw me into significant legal financial issues. My labs my toxicology, my story and my collateral from colleagues from colleagues all indicated light to moderate alcohol use but my evaluators word stood as the word of God.
More frightening was the director of this rehabs acknowledgment of this. The director who happens to also coincidentally be the evaluator, stated to me as well as to staff on multiple occasions: “ I suggest inpatient treatment for everyone who is reported”. “This is safer for me not to miss anyone who could harm patients, and I figure there must be a reason someone reported them.”
I am still elucidating the reason why I was determined guilty and proven innocent, however I can say from my 90 day stent that the majority of the patients at this rehab needed to be there. This program is saving lives of both providers and patients, however it is destroying the lives of those wrongfully accused.
Chapter 4 your lisense rehab or jail : Upon arivil I was sent to a detox hospital underwent a medical examination and was “one of the lucky ones” who required no detoxification and could report directly to PHP. Like everyone else, I spent 90 days in a PHP, being as 6-10 weeks is simply a lie they tell patients to decrease the change of resisting the treatment. When discussing the topic one therapist sated “if we told patients 90 days they would never come.” She then attempted to justify the treatment by outlining the story of a patient she had called who “didn’t make it to treatment” and killed themselves”. It is my belief that it is not the lack of PHP which impelled such professionals to take their life, but them realizing that they now will be obliged to undergo 90 days of PHP, 5 years of PRN monitoring with a loss of autonomy and hundreds of thousands of dollars taken from them that induced their hopelessness. For even if these professionals were truly mentally unstable in their addictions, in every case it was only following a phone call where they were informed they must undergo treatment that they took their life’s. By this time I still haven’t the slightest clue what PRN was.
Despite the security these programs provide for many my 6 main issues with them can be summarized in : 1. Kick backs: evaluators are directors of treatment clinics 2. The reported are guilty till proven innocent 3. The price, the overflow of money these places drag in from both patients and state universities is appalling, they charge separately for every visit and test 4. Although they make the claim that they are individualized, they are anything but. Every patient gets the same stay and treatment from the doctor drunk on the job and the one who was late to a shift 5. They force voluntary treatment. remember that friendly evaluator who promised he had your best interest at heart, so you opened up and told him everything about your substance use/ developmental / family history, well if you don’t stay for 90 days he will be “normally obliged” to tip the board of medical off to you.

1. The programs have overstepped their intended jurisdiction. -these programs work well if they function how they were intended at their inception. Cite original purpose. Originally these programs were designed to protect physicians and civilians from impaired practitioners; being healthcare workers who were impaired at work. Over the years, these organizations have extended their authority to encompass individuals with substance use disorders When not at work and also those who are in training to become healthcare professionals. Take for example myself compared to a physician who is impaired at work. A doctor who arrived for duty under the influence would surely benifit from the extensive testing, therapy and accountability enforced via these programs. In accordance the 20,000$ per year cost is appropriate when only making up roughly 7% of their yearly salary vs nearly half of a residents. In my case with my loss of income from employment, coast of treatment and monitoring, this year I will be required to pay 20,000$ to work. Yes, I will be losing money to work. Even if did indeed have a substance use disorder this level of monitoring wouldn’t not be considered appropriate.

Dispite all of the miscomings of this System My time spend in PHP was indeed helpful, as I believe it would be for anyone. Time for exercise, a reprieve from work and weekly counseling. A sample structure of my day to day schedule is provided below for insight:
Structure The general structure of these rehabitation centers is as follows: 1. One week of orientation phase, where you are not allowed in electronics or contact with the outside world world. Therefore, if you’re going, bring some things you would like to read or study. 2. In phase 2, you can use your phone however you cannot leave campus. You must stay in the dorm on campus. These shitty 1 room run down apartments with two other roommates will cost you about $1000 a week, they are required for at least four weeks and they are billed separately, no insurance will help you out here. 3. In phase 3 you can commute to campus if you beg your therapist and live very close. Whether you’re on campus or living off-campus, you are allowed to leave up to four hours per day. If you commute, you’ll be required to take a sober link decide you must Breath, alcohol test into every 6 hours. Like everything else in this program you must pay for this separately, a few hundred dollars a week. You advanced to other phases by completing assignments, however, assignments are limited by required built-in time, intrusive, scheduling, and reviewing. Therefore, if you do everything as rapidly as possible phase 1 will take one week phase 2 will take three weeks.
Every day schedule:
7:30: wake up, report to the front desk to inform them that you haven’t ran away yet and take and prescribed medications. They keep all your medications and require that you report to take them; for me this was antidepressants in an attempt to dispel the depression I contracted from being forced into treatment and whatever off label medication they were attempting to treat my ADHD with, since control medications were forbidden.
8 am: community group assessments This consisted of other patients presenting their assignments amongst the large group, on the weekends this was often an hour later and 12 study regularly took the place of assignment presentation.
10 am: process group. This was a two hour group therapy session with 6 to 12 other professionals in a therapist and training or occasionally a licensed mental health therapist.
1 pm: recreation This was generally about an hour of some sober themed craft or activity. Once a week this time slot was used for yoga.
2 pm: this was another time slot used for patients to present assignments as well as for individual therapy sessions. Each patient had one individual therapy session lasting 30 minutes per week.
3pm: This was time allotted to work on assignments or go to the gym on your sex specific scheduled gym day.
5pm: this time was used for guest speakers or another 12 step study group.
6 pm : this was generally an off-campus 12 step group
10 pm: report to the front desk and let them know you still haven’t ran away and take and Medication which are prescribed to take at night, then return to your cot bed in your room with 1-2 other roommates.
I found the community to be one of the most beneficial aspects of the PHP program. I was in a cohort of chill ass professionals of the same occupation who were always there to help each other.
Assignments The curriculum of the PHP consisted of assignment based on every step of the 12th step program. Generally, a patient would be required to complete an assignment on their own, review it with other patients, then faculty and finally present the assignment in front of the whole treatment group. You’re only given one assignment at a time and there are multiple steps to each which all requires scheduling this ensures that no matter how determined a patient is a full 90 days of treatment is required to complete all the assignments.
AA structure -the obsolete nature of AA has been verified in numbers studies, but I will refrain from divulging here and lend that endeavor to Dr. Lance Dodes very thorough discussion on the subject,in “the sober truth “
In all sincerity, if I truely did have a severe use disorder this experience could have been life saving. I only wish I could have used my 50 grand for someone who has spent their life time In addictive without reprieve. My first conversation when I was given my phone back was how I wish my father could be able to attend this PHP.
Chapter 5 reporting and PRN Self reporting What they ask you What you should tell them
There’s a third-party agency called professional resource network. Every state has their own. This agency works as a liaison between you and whatever credentialing service your occupation requires. Essentially they ensure your monitoring after treatment. Stake governments and licensing boards trust them, mainly because they monitor with the highest level of intrusiveness. This alleviates much work for state governments and licensing boards because once an individual is being monitored by a professional resource network, then they are deemed appropriate for duty and no further investigation/litigation needs to occur, as long as the monitored individual completely complies.
Because I was never impaired at work I was never reported to this agency. The general workflow of things someone would report you to professional resource network, then the resource network would contact you, and then you would be required to report for an evaluation at a treatment center, which would inevitably result in a suggestion I’ve treatment at that given treatment center. In my case I was sent to the treatment center without PRN being involved. Thus, two weeks into treatment. I was notified by my therapist that I needed to call PRN and self report. I attempted to resistance given that I did not have a problem and was not individually seeking help. I asked what happened if I didn’t self report. I was told that in order to stay in the treatment program I had to report to PRN. This meant either I report to PRN or I get kicked out of the treatment program and lose my job.
When you report to PRN they will ask you why you are in treatment. They will then list off every substance imaginable, asking you if you have ever tried the substance and when your last use was. Ultimately, they will obtain your discharge information from your treatment center, so it is in your best interest to report only what was found in your biochemical testing. If it wasn’t in your hair, I would argue that you don’t have a use disorder regarding that substance and it’s not relevant. I don’t believe it’s important for them to know that you smoked weed when you were 12.
Chapter 6 The contract:
Before being discharged from a treatment facility, a professional resource network will have you sign a contract. A little known fact which I was oblivious to is that contracts can be negotiated. Though this isn’t it possible, it is highly improbable that you can negotiate your contract since PRN has a power to delay your clearance to return to work.
Contractor almost never personalized, and I have not heard of a contract which is not a five-year agreement. You will sign releases of information so that PRN has access to all of your information which was gathered at the treatment facility. You must have a therapist, psychiatrist, primary care, doctor, and a addiction, medicine psychiatrist. You assign releases of information for all of them. You will be required To commit to: 1. three mutual aid meetings a week which you must log. I log smart recovery meetings. 2. Weekly therapy sessions with an approved mental health therapist from their list 3. Monthly doctors appointments with an addiction medicine psychiatrist 4. Yearly appointments with a primary care physician 5. Monthly appointments with a psychiatrist 6. Daily check-ins on a random drug testing app ( you will agree to weekly urine tests, a peth test 4 times a year, a hair test twice a year and a little caveat that says anything else they deem, clinically reasonable) 7. Quarterly update reports which you are required to obtain from a workplace monitor, therapist, addiction, medicine, psychiatrist, primary care physician and any other doctor you are seeing. 8. You must upload all of your prescriptions into a mobile application every single time you get them refilled and are not allowed to take them until they are approved. 9. Attendance of a PRN group via zoom. This is a local group you are assigned along with other monitored practitioners. There is a fee of roughly 130$ a month to attend this required group. For me all of these requirements coast around 20,000 a year. If you ever have a positive test even if it is the result of contamination from rubbing alcohol or unintentional ingestion of alcohol/ allergy medication your contract will rest to 5 years from the time of positive test. Once your five year contract is completed, you must ask to be released from monitoring. At that point they will search for any reason to keep you under monitoring. This could be dilute urines, daily check ins or a week where you did not attend mutual aid meetings. Every certification and license which you apply for will likely ask you if you were under a monitoring program/ have been treated for substance use. You must give an explanation and check yes. As far as licensing programs are concerned, if you were under the monitoring of PRN, you are safe, however they group practitioners who have had behavioral issues with practitioners who were diverting drugs from work. Therefore, keep in mind that you will be labeled as a sever addict.
7 Back to work and only work. During treatment your only goal is to return to work, however when you return your experience will be drastically distinct from what you remember. For me, I was now working in isolation. Missing six months of my training meant that no other Resident was on the same rotation as me. My coworkers at all formed friend groups. When I returned I was greeted with much concern for my well being. No one would speak to be about my absence, however everyone knew there is only one reason a resident would leave for 6 months then return. My Accdeemic meetings were consisting of attending telling me “I have a target on my back now” and “ I have to preform even better than others” in the light of my time missed. If this wasn’t alienating enough, the majority of Resident events, sponsored by recruiters and my university revolved around alcohol to which I had to give some excuse to why I can not partake with others. I’m fortunate that I do not have an addiction, because these stressful conditions along with the daunting amount of dead and requirements imposed by PRN are enough to make any addict relapse. While I was at treatment, I was in the dative with Samyr stories a physicians whose addictions got the best of them. Physicians who did not make it to treatment, often taking their own life. These stories were presented as a warning. Your addictions will kill you without our treatment was the message. When, in reality I did not hear one story in which the addiction killed physician. Every physician who didn’t make it to treatment took their life after being told they must report to a treatment facility. Perhaps they knew what this entailed and it was not their addiction or getting caught which caused them to end their lives, but the unmanageable and often unreasonable burden that treatment would put on their lives.
9 How to escape So your fucked your in PRN and should be or you should and now your recovered and want to terminated your contract.

1. You ask to be released early done at 1/2 time ( good luck)
2. You have “good reason” (no one has ever been let out of contract because of this reason, the verbiage is far too vague)
3. You serve all your time and they let you out(maybe, as discussed earlier, they would do everything they can to keep you in your contract as long as your practicing)
4. You can’t practice medicine anymore

10 Layer up butter cup : I cannot emphasize the extent to which legal help is required in this process. You much seek it and seek it early. Lawyers can provide many avenues to you early in the process. Once you have committed to treatment, gone for evaluation or are in a PRN contract , this is very little that you or legal help can do. Spend a few thousand dollars when you are accused and save the 20-30,000 later.
After you have been evaluated if you disagree as I did, then this is the process you must undergo. 1. Hire a occupation, defense, lawyer 2. Prove you don’t have an addiction, this is done by having an alternative evaluator with similar credentials state that either you don’t have an addiction or that PRN’s level of monitoring is not medically appropriate ( this will need to be a multi day neuropsychological evaluation, which will cost about $5000). 3. Your lawyer must draft in writing that the medical level of monitoring is not required such as another medical professional and send this to PRN 4. PRN will tattle on you to the board of medicine. 5. The board of medicine will conduct an investigation. 6. At the end or when they believe they have enough reasonable evidence to the board of medicine will suspend your license or claim, you must comply with the PRN contract to practice. 7. At this time your lawyer will defend you in the state court against the board. This is costly but much less than the coast of a 5 year PRN contract 8. If you win you will likely suggest an alternative level of care such as gonna get therapy every week. If you lose, than you wasted a fuck ton of money and are still bound by your PRN contract.
Overall this entire process has coast me Over all coast:
My finances for this year only including PRN and rent are as follows:
120-200$ every week for testing 480-800/ month
65 every week for therapy 195/month
125 every month for PRN group
About 50-69 every month for 2 doctor apts
So at least 745$/month at the lowest
Treatment at the recovery center coast 20,000 for me out of pocket and
I wasn’t payed for 6 months with no FMLA because I am a first year. At the 1 year mark I will have made 26,000 this year after taxes And payed About 29,000 on PRN alone
Rent is 1,000 so that’s 12,000 a year
Just in rent and PRN alone I will be at 26,000- 41,600 -15,600.
I will be in debt by at least 18,000 at the 1 year mark
Coast of treatment center 20,000 (with insurance) For each year of PRN roughly 20,000 Add that to 6 months of attending salary which was delayed due to my treatment time: at least 150,000 Layer coasts along with other evaluations 25,000 Missing 6 months of residency pay 30,000 Coast of 1 year in monitoring: 245,000 Coast of 5 years 325,000
If my case progress to a trail I will require an extra 20,000 in court coasts
Chapter 11 My secondary eval: Dr sushi After I arrived at my treatment center I challenge my evaluation multiple times. Each and every time I was discharged and often accused of alternate mental health/ substance abuse issues to discourage my advances. I was never given the opportunity to undergo alternative assessment, however PRN guidelines state that you can obtain a second option within 7 days of your first. This is a mute point, however, because you will not receive the results of your evaluation until over a week after it is conducted and the second evaluation must be conducted by another PRN hired evaluator of their choosing. During my stay in rehab I contacted PRN multiple times to attempt another evaluation/ legal help. They warned against both stating they were a “waste of money” and “pointless”.
After completing my treatment with the guidance of many addiction, experienced physicians, mental health counselors and psychiatrists recommendations I sought in a secondary evaluation. I chose a highly qualified professional with over 30 years of experience to conduct an extensive neuo psycho social evaluation of me. One that I was sure would be more extensive than the evaluation I received at treatment and more importantly an unbiased evaluation.
The results from my evaluation not only showed that I did not have a substance abuse problem warranting PRN level monitoring, but also that PRN was falling to allow adequate treatment of other conditions such as my ADHD. My evaluation showed my ADHD was not only untreated by PRNs attempt at using non controlled medication, but also in the top 3% most severe presentations of ADHD. My evaluator went on to explain my results by questioning why my treatment center even mandated I undergo neuro cognitive evaluation. The only neurodiverse findings were my IQ, my dyslexia and my ADHD. However, a neuo cognitive examination can be billed separately by treatment centers, therefore they always recommend one.
Chapter 12 Amongst its greed, intrusive nature and faulty accusations, professional recourse network function highly proficiently at the task they were designed to; protective physicians and patients from physicians who are impaired at work. In this domain they save lives, offer second changes and protect the public. When they act beyond their intended jurisdiction by imposing unnecessary monetary demands on practitionersin training, accuse practitioners without proof or act on behavior exemplified outside of a work setting they unjustly and inappropriately attack the week and innocent.
Proposed reform: As a trainee my universities malpractice insurance covers me for mistakes made at work. If a learner mistakenly harms a patient, then the university stands on their behalf. If the learner does something wrong under a teachers direct guidance, then the teacher is at fault. This makes sense logically as well as pragmatically. The state entrusts large amounts of money to hospital systems and universities to train resident physicians. A portion of this money is allocated to malpractice insurance. This should extend to accused impairment.
Suppose a training university was required to cover rehabilitation and monitoring of a resident of whom they claim is impaired. Alternatively they have the option of firing the trainee. This would reduce the number of innocent trainees being accused of impairment, make the process of rehabilitation more fair and provide a better use for tax payer derived dollars, which hospital systems are given to train residents. The truly impaired could still seek help, less false accusations would be made and with the employers having the ability to fire at the moment of impairment, there would be less chance of impairment at work.

Hello everyone.
We are currently hiring 100% remote Market Researchers.
Are you looking for the opportunity to work 100% remotely for a small, friendly, and modern company?
Do you have excellent communication skills and an eagerness to learn about different topics?
Are you confident, articulate, and comfortable speaking to a range of professionals on a variety of topics?
If so, perhaps you'd like to join our team! In summary, the role involves making outbound calls to recruit individuals to take part in our research projects and then running through the survey questions with them.
We operate between standard UK office hours, however, shifts are flexible and you can choose which days/how many hours you work.
We're a Scottish company but the role is 100% remote, so we don't mind where you are as long as you have a decent internet connection.
At the moment we are looking for speakers of the following languages:

• English
• German
• Hungarian
• Romanian
• Greek

(From time to time we run projects in other languages but for now these are the main ones we need!)
Pay is £12.82 per hour
If interested, please email a CV to jobs@pexel.co.uk

ive been mindfucked since yesterday since i found out the truth about my whole family situation. my 'grandma' isnt even my real grandma. my grandpa fucked my 'grandmas' little sister (my actual real grandma) when they were married and had a child (my mum) so my real grandma has passed away now and i had a pseudo grandma for my whole life
my grandpa then went onto have 6 more kids with my 'grandma'. the thing is my grandparents raised my mum as if she was their own, so my mum is the oldest in the 'family'
i have a large extended family but i always felt like the black sheep. my cousins and aunties/uncles have been my half cousins and half aunties/uncles this whole time. apparently none of my cousins know but all the uncles and aunties know
to give some backstory, my oldest aunty hated my mum and was a nasty bitch to her since adolescence and my mum still detest her till this day. i never got along with my cousins from that aunty, even tho they had a son just 1 year younger than me. i felt like i got the same treatment my mum got from her sister. those cousins (2 girls and 2 boys) would social media stalk me and engage in malicious gossip and spread fucked up rumours about me. and at family gatherings they would make snide comments randomly at me. my mum assumes the reason for the hostility from my aunt towards her is coz she found out she comes from another mum (her aunt)
im 30 years old now and for the last 10 years i barely went to any of the social gatherings, but went to alot of them growing up as a kid and adolescent. my other cousin would also make nasty comments at me randomly when i did attend a gathering. like purposely trying to exclude me from the tribe. even tho they dont know about this secret its like deep down unconsciously they do. some of my uncles would also frequently try to belittle me whenever they saw fit. the aunty that was a bitch to my mum was kinda cold to me too, and it feels kinda 'fake' when i did interact with her
my grandpa passed away last year and my mum eventually found out the truth by confirmations from her uncles/aunties. the twisted thing is my mum had an inkling growing up coz she said my 'grandma' abused her and was very mean to her. she thought that my grandma didnt love her growing up. growing up my 'grandma' was never really that affectionate with me, but she was with my cousins. like cuddling them and doting/kissing so that added the suspicion for my mum. my mum had a cousin that was 9 years older, and she thought it was odd when my 'grandma' never took care of my mum as a baby/kid but her aunty (real grandma) would take care of my mum and be really affectionate
the fucked up thing is my mum confronted my grandpa when she was like 35 (55 years old now) about her suspicion that her aunty is her real mother and my aunts told my grandpa to put my mum in a mental institution coz they didnt want the secret out and he went through with it. so my mum was put into the psychiatric hospital for schizophrenia. they knew it would taint my grandpas image and wanted my cousins to believe in this happy little lie
so i grew up having a 'psychotic mum' but she they just gas lit the fuck out of her. my mum had multiple suicide attempts when i was growing up as a kid/teenger
my mum and her older cousin that knew had a meeting with 1 of my aunties to talk about it after confirmation that it was all true and my aunty just told them to promise not to tell any of the kids (cousins and me/my siblings) so they dont 'taint' the image of grandpa and the drama it could ensue. my mum is obviously going to break that promise and eventually tell my other siblings (im the first to know)
my mum barely ever sees them and doesn't attend any of the gatherings. everything is clicking now why i always felt like an outsider. my other siblings are the same that we dont go to the gatherings except 1 of my sisters since shes gets along with them. but my mum doesnt know if she should tell her the truth
at the funeral 1 of the cousins that was quite cold and nasty to me gave a eulogy, and you know how when u give a eulogy u 'gas' them up (like try to make them seem like such a great person) using phrases like how he was a gentle man etc (she literally said that lol) but the point is theres alot of pretentiousness in this family and i just thought that was amusing
ive met my grandma only twice in my life when i was a teenager and she came to visit and my sisters wedding but i dont remember it. when she passed away 5 years ago in vietnam my mum was the only one to attend the funeral. apparently everyone was shocked how similar my mum looked like her but everyone just said coz shes her niece
a part of me feels sad that ill never get to experience the warmth of my grandma. whats its like to be doted on as a kid. my interactions with my 'grandma' always felt kinda distant. it was actually the same with my grandpa. its like we reminded him of how he betrayed his wife. didnt help that they could barely speak english lol, i wonder how different everything would be if we could actually talk to each other since i cant speak Vietnamese and they never bothered to learn english when they migrated to australia
now looking at some of the family photos and its like a whole new lens has been added. dont know if its a fake smile coming from my 'grandma' or not and i swear i can see the rage and bitterness in her eyes
theres only like 1 cousin that i feel like i have a 'decent' bond with, and most of the others im amicable with. but for the specific family members that treated me harshly for whatever reason it showed me the truth that i was never truly part of the family. the next time i see them i wonder whats its going to feel like since i only just know the truth now. my mum said the aunties are being more distant with her since they now know that my mum also knows the truth
i feel pretty fucked in the head growing up in that family. still deal with mental health issues and poor self esteem and i attribute a lot to growing up with them. not to say there weren't ever any good or fun times but the negative just outweighs the positive by a landslide. i really wonder what life would be like if instead of my grandpa taking care of my mum she stayed back in Vietnam with my grandma and we never knew this family
just had to rant coz my mind is going haywire about all of this and how everything has played out in my life. i dunno if im just mindfucking myself but everything just makes sense now

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I built an Evelyn the Covetous deck around a few themes Vampire Tribal, Blinking, and playing my opponents deck. Can you take a look and tell me what I'm missing
https://manabox.app/decks/4I7QwM-IRvyJqk9A2Q7Aig

I have a genuine question. In my head it makes sense that even a married couple should have separate rooms if possible. Sometimes you need your own private space. A space to release your own energy, emotions or any matters you want to deal with personally. Maybe even sleep on your own once in a while.
I tried asking my social circle and I was met by strong pushbacks. I understand their point. A marriage is a union, where your relationship grows stronger and closer. But maybe I don’t get it. Why can’t married couples have that but not take away from privacy and individuality. I guess my thought is, you can sleep in separate beds from time to time but still be in a healthy and thriving unity.
I read in a research paper that it can be healthy to have a separate space from time to time to allow for yearning of the other body to grow. So I guess to me, I really do like the idea of sharing a roof together but having a common as well as separate rooms.
I’m by no means married, or at least not for now, but, if I do get married, i quite like to adopt this idea.

I am the marketing director in the alcohol industry at a small(ish) company (four locations and a production facility, about 100-150 employees). I am a department of one, and even though I am in marketing, I do it all. I have taken all our design in house, do all our PR, manage our digital presence, etc. As you can imagine this is a lot of work and takes a very wide skill set.
Like most of you, I am severely underpaid, especially considering my whole department does everything and doesn’t hire out for any work, saving the company buttloads of $$$. Recently I asked for a raise, and gave them a salary number of what I am worth and then a number less than that for what I was willing to accept and wanted. Today they finally gave me my offer, which was much less than the number I was firm that I wanted.
However, they offered me the potential of a bonus early next year if I meet certain goals, meaning hard numbers and financial goals. Am I wrong for being confused by this? Marketing has very little financial tangibles that I can prove lead back to my efforts personally without relying on the rest of my team to do their jobs well. I am not in sales so why incentivize my role, especially when I could use all my channels I manage to just benefit me and those goals, and ignore the rest of the company’s needs. Also, this bonus and my slight pay increase combined would equal the equivalent of what I asked for as a salary. Why not just give me an increase in salary instead?
I think it’s dumb and need some opinions and thoughts from you all. TY.

I'm currently in Berlin, Germany, and about to be homeless for 2 weeks on the streets. I signed up for a study abroad program from my university, which I just graduated from last semester. I paid the application fee, got picked, paid for my own flight here and back, and then got a scholarship from an alumni couple in the department I got my degree in, and that scholarship paid for the rest of the trip.
I worked my ass off doing research and selling a bunch of my stuff to get the plane tickets because I'm pretty broke. I was excited for this trip because I was accepted into a German university for graduate school and figured I'd get a good introduction to living in Germany, and to be honest, Berlin itself has been great, all the locals I've met have been very nice to me, but my professors and everyone working from my university have been really unprofessional and tricky and now I'm in an unsafe position.** EDIT to add that when I say Friday I mean tomorrow, so I have about 1 day until getting kicked out of the hotel.
Long explanation, skip to the bottom for a TLDR:
Before I even got on a single plane, I found out customer service for my phone carrier and I had a misunderstanding a month ago when I bought my international plan and found out about 3 days in advance that my phone would be a brick here. I told the professor immediately and she said worse case scenario she would help me get a working phone when I landed, since it's kind of needed for basic safety. Just half a day before the first flight, I got bitten by a few deer ticks and said I might also need help scheduling a doctors appointment when I land, because our travel insurance required a working phone number and it was too late for me to make an appointment before my flight. The professor said that was fine and I would be helped with that as well, so I got on the first plane in full confidence.
When I landed, a day passed without either thing being handled, and that was fine by me, but then multiple days passed and the professor kind of just waved it off. I'd started to feel a little unwell and asked the professor to help me find a doctor and she said it was just jetlag.
One of the first days of the program we went to a restaurant, and the seating was a very small reserved room with our entire 20+ cohort in it. I have CPTSD and am claustrophobic and knew immediately that I did not want to sit there, so I asked the professor if she could help me ask the staff request a seat for me in the outside dining area, or, if one wasn't available, that I could just sit outside on a nearby bench and skip dinner. She told me the room was reserved for us and this was on the itinerary so I HAD to sit there, and when I again said I didn't think I could, she demanded I sit there again and condescendingly asked me if I really couldn't or just didn't want to. I started to cry as quietly as possible and then that suddenly made her understand, so we went outside and I explained that, in my opinion, trying to force any adult to do something they're uncomfortable with and have said "No" to is bad enough to me normally, but since I have a disability, it's also ableist. I tried to frame that sentiment in a "I'm sure you didn't mean it this way" kind of way but she still took offence to the criticism and I think that led to the rest of this.
After that happened I was feeling more ill and the professor said, "Oh, do you think it's lyme? Because if it was lyme you'd have a rash. It's probably still jetlag". At this point I said again that I needed some help getting a working phone number and medical advice from a doctor and she told me to take responsibility for myself. I'd bought myself a SIM card but it needed some unexpected trouble shooting and everything was in German (I know some German but only around A2 level and absolutely none is required for this program), so I'd already tried to help myself, and again could not schedule myself an appointment without a working phone.
I asked the professor if she could put her phone number in just to let the appointment scheduling process complete and she said no. I asked if she had any other ideas and she again told me to figure it out. I wound up walking 20 minutes through Berlin alone with no working phone to a doctor's office unannounced, barely able to fill half the sign in sheet and navigate the language barrier, and successfully got the antibiotics I needed and a lyme diagnosis. The nurse even asked why I came alone. Thankfully for me everyone in the doctors office including the doctor was very very nice to me despite the curveball I through them.
Not long after all that the professor sent an email with me cc'd in to the office of international affairs at the university, and the email said, in effect, "This student said they have a disability and can't stick to the itinerary and therefore I think they're not a good fit for this program and should go home." I immediately responded that that wasn't accurate, that I just could not sit inside a restaurant or other very cramped space, etc. Then I figured while I was at it I'd tell them about the total lack of care for my safety or wellbeing here. After sending that email the professor confronted me and tried to pretty much intimidate me into admitting everything was all my fault or something, I honestly have no clue, I think she was just upset and trying to make me feel better somehow. I think my criticism really got to her and made her kind of just hate me and that she wanted to make me make her feelings make sense. No clue honestly.
Anyway, after that the office of international affairs reached back out to me and were acting way nicer than they were when I first enrolled in this program, which felt sus, but I was haggard and miserable and wanted to be able to trust them so I did. They told me if I was considering coming home early for my own health and safety, that I could unenroll that night to make sure the alum who gave me a scholarship would at least be refunded, but that I had to do it that night since it was the last day to drop for a refund. I said I wasn't sure if I wanted to leave the program, and they said if you're considering it unenroll and if you want to stay after further discussion then we can probably just go ahead and re enroll you.
So I did it. The next day I'm scheduled to meet with someone who told me the day or so before that she would be my advocate and that she was there to listen to and represent me, and when I join the zoom meeting, it's her, but also two other people from the international affairs office. They're telling me my return flight has already been scheduled and everything and that they were sending out a person to chaperone me on the flight, because, though it was totally ignored on my flights here, I'd mentioned at the very start of the application process that I'd been a human trafficking victim before and ideally wanted to fly with someone instead of alone. All of this had less than a 24 hour turnaround from me unenrolling.
I realized hours after unenrolling that I don't want to leave the program, I just want to actually be allowed to engage in the program as it was advertised and as it was promised, and that leaving the program, to me, feels like capitulating to the professor being an asshole to me and like removing liability from the university. In short I think I pretty much got tricked into unenrolling. I told them I didn't want to leave early and they told me they already scheduled everything and got a refund for my hotel room, so if I don't take the flight back Friday, I will be homeless on the streets for 2 weeks until the flight that I personally purchased for the 31st, and that since I hit the unenroll button, my housing, health, or safety will no longer be the universities problem after Friday.
So, the fuck do I do with this, ya'll got any advice? I could really use some. Or even just some support haha.
TLDR: Got tricked into hitting unenroll button after damaging professors ego, most likely purposely tricked to absolve the university of responsibility because how the profs were treating me and everything I described probably did make me a liability even if not my fault, but I'm mad and I'm enjoying Berlin and don't want to leave or let the university get away with risking my health and safety multiple times with no apologies.

Hey yall, I never been one to post anything on Reddit. This is my first time on this sub too so I don't know how yall talk to each other on here so ill try to keep this short.
My ex and I have been broken up for about 10 months now and the last time I spoke to her was through text 5 months ago. I basically told her how I felt about her still, how much I missed her and how I wish I could have done more in the relationship. I ended it with how I would love to still be with her and hoping she would give me a second chance. I should also state that I said that if she felt I was being too clingy or pushy to ignore and to not even respond to the message, regardless if she responded or not I would respect her decision. She never responded. Its been 5 months and it appears her response, is no response.
We broke up on good terms, it was life circumstances that caused us to break up. I did notice that before the break up she became distant and even told me that she need time to her self. I knew that the relationship would come to an end. After a few days she told me that she just can't give me what I need, that she loved me and that she hopes we can still cherish this friendship that we had together. Over the course of a few months she checked up on me and as did I. We also broke up a month before her birthday and I still sent her the gifts that I wanted to give her prior to our break up. She said she loved them. A few days into the new year I texted her I hope she's doing well and she said the same to me and that I deserve nothing but the best in life. A few days after this, I sent her the message on how I felt about her and what we once had.
Its almost my birthday, in just a few days really. And as I was getting my journal to write down some thoughts I had, I saw the card she had given me last year. I forgot I had left it near my writing area. I opened it and began crying as I read what she had wrote. It reminded me of what we once had, of how happy I truly was back then. To be loved by someone in this world and to be accepted by someone.
I know it's been almost a year, but everyday since the break up I think about her. For the first few months it was hard but I kept trying and trying to move on and heal. It was easy on some days but most days were difficult. I don't even know how I was able to go on and not contact her after I told her how I felt but I somehow kept going, I kept living. I feel suicidal, there are days were I want to end my life, but I don't because I don't want to hurt my family. I don't do it because I know I'm stronger than my mind. I don't do it because I know there's so much more to life.
Im going to be 25, and she was my first ever girlfriend; I know sad. She was my first kiss and prior to this I only ever been in talking stages and I've done an incredible transformation for myself prior to meeting her. I was 225 lbs and I slimmed down to 170 in about a year. I became more social and confident and then one day I met her at work. We actually sat close to each other at our training then 2 months into our work we were assigned to sit next to each other. Slowly but surely we became talking to eachother and eventually we were attracted to each other and we began dating. We only dated for 6 months. But in those 6 months I never felt so happy. I never felt so loved and cared for. I never felt accepted before until I met her.
I know this wasn't short by any means and my thoughts are all jumbled and unorganized but I just had to get this of my chest. I just need a reminder that I'll be okay. That I'll get over this heart break and that I'll be just fine being alone. I know happiness comes from within and that the only person to will be with me is me, and that being kind to myself is the most important thing to being mentally healthy. So to me, writing this and hoping someone relates or someone can wish me luck is a way of healing.
Sorry for making a long and unorganized post yall, I just had to clear my mind. Thank you for reading and I hope you have a good day, take care.

I had a call with my doctor last week about my mental health, and I had a bit of a breakdown about how much my pain is affecting me. It has just passed a year since I started feeling constant, debilitating pain that has left me pretty much housebound. I’ve been really hesitant when asking for prescription pain medication for the past year as I was hyper aware of what it could come off as as a 20 year old uni student asking, so I have just never brought it up and just asked for scans and checkups etc, and took over the counter meds daily. I was given codeine at an A&E visit during a horrible episode, and it helped although made me incredibly tired and stupid, so I wasn’t interested in asking for any more opioids.
Last week I think something in me snapped and I realised I didn’t have to live this life that is making me so anxious and depressed and I have the right to request my pain be managed, and I pretty much told him “I can’t imagine living like this for the next however many years until my surgery. I’m not functioning and it’s killing me”. He faffed about for a bit, telling me “well I’m not really sure what to do to be honest” and “I’m not sure there’s much I can do for you to help in this case” and “When you phoned today what were you hoping I’d say” and I just persisted with “I want advice on the best route for me to take to get this pain under control until I get the surgery”, and finally he offered me tramadol to take as needed (despite sounding very unhappy about it). I’ve only taken one in the past week as I’ve decided only to use them when my pain is affecting my ability to complete tasks, but when I did, oh my God. Within an hour my pain was down to a 2 (a number I very rarely feel), and after 7 hours or so it climbed back up to its usual non-flare up level. I was able to just skip a quick flare up until the baseline pain reached a level I can deal with. It doesn’t make me feel drowsy (in fact I feel a little more energised), it doesn’t make me stupid and stoned like codeine, maybe just a tiny bit more chilled out than usual.
Just knowing that I have this to fall back on when I know I’m going into a flare up has reduced my anxiety tenfold, and knowing that if I have an event or a class to show up to and I’m too sore, there’s now a chance I could make it is a security that I haven’t felt in years. I hope I won’t need them forever, but knowing I have something to pull me over until the next step is such a relief on both my mind and my body.
In conclusion, doctors who say controlled drugs are not appropriate treatments for chronic pain need to go back to school. I am so grateful toward myself for making this choice and standing up for myself.

There is any extra-questions I should consider asking before taking this offer? What do you think?
1. PERSONALIA

• Age: 36
• Education: PhD Machine Learning
• Work experience : 6 years
• Civil status: Single
• Dependent people/children: 1

2. EMPLOYER PROFILE

• SectoIndustry: Consultancy
• Amount of employees: 10-20 in company, 1-150 in the group it's a part of
• Multinational? YES

3. CONTRACT & CONDITIONS

• Current job title: AI engineer, but it's more a blend of AI and data engineering
• Seniority: ?
• Official hours/week : 38
• Average real hours/week incl. overtime: 40
• Shiftwork or 9 to 5 (flexible?): 9 to 5, should also be flexible
• On-call duty: NO
• Vacation days/year: 32 (20 legal holidays, 12 compensation days, 10 Belgian Public Holidays)

4. SALARY

• Gross salary/month: 4500
• Net salary/month: should be around 2900
• Netto compensation: 115
• Mobility budget/cabike/...: €450 net/month leasing budget for+ card
• 13th month: Full
• Meal vouchers: 6
• Group insurance: Included
• Other insurances: Included
• Other benefits: Sectorpremium Industry Committee 200 (what is that?)

5. MOBILITY

• City/region of work: Brussels, Depends on the customer
• Distance home-work: 60 minutes one way
• How do you commute?: Car
• How is the travel home-work compensated: company car OR public transport (even with mobility budget)
• Telework days/week: Depends on the customer, but should be 3

6. OTHER

• How easily can you plan a day off: unknown, but shouldn't be all to difficult and again, depends on the customer
• Is your job stressful? I hope not
• Responsible for personnel (reports): No

Hi, i am 22(F) and this is about me leaving my friend after college. So i met this girl, let's name her shreya, through college friends. However, she left the college in 1st sem itself so i never really knew her well. Fast forward, covid happened and so did lockdown. We started talking online and became really good friends in the meantime. I was really happy to have a friend, I would calle her my bestfriend. But this was only online. Covid decreased and offline classes started again and eventually she decides to continue from our college after lockdown. So we started meeting irl as well. As a gesture isused to pick her up from on the way to college as she didn't have a source (she has a brother who could drop her though). As we started meeting each other more often, her behaviour changed. She would often cut me in conversations, imposing her opinions on me and if i disagree she would start picking on me. She would even try to mock and abuse me in front of people who are nowhere my close friends. At the same time, she would want me to pick her up from home as if her parents had appointed me, I chose to take her along with me to college because I thought this will help her and i would not alone as the college is at distant place. Once it happened that i was waiting for her in the garden of our college so that we can go, I waited for like 30 minutes, however, she came and her brother had come to pick her up she went along with him without informing me. I was calling her multiple times during as i saw her going towards gate, first i thought she went to see puppies over there but no she straightaway went there without even having a brain to atheist inform me. I still waited for her for 10-15 minutes so that she is not left alone in any case. But afterwards she says she went with her brother. Its not a problem to go with your brother but atleast inform me since you order me around to take you college everyday. I got frustrated a bit from this so i decided to keep a little distance from her, i stopped over communicating and talked only when required, started saying no.
Things were going this way, she came into a new relationship that time so she was busy in that so she never noticed my change except for one time. However, One fine event i decided to cut every ties off. Our last sem exams were going on, during that time a guy had approached me, I talked to him a few days, however, I had a doubt as online talking stages dpnt go well for me. So i decided to ask this girl, shreya. I did this because she was herself in an online relationship and perhaps she could help mein the thought that were coming in my mind. I told her about this and she said talk to him more to know about him. I did the same but again, the doubt wasn't going anywhere so I decided to stop talking to him, we (i and that guy) talked about few things where we disagreed and eventually we decided to stop whatever was going on. I told her about this and she said i can only see arrange marriage for you in future, as we had exam after two days, I decided not to extend this conversation and will talk about this once exemas are done (ie two days later) On the exam day, because of all the mishap that happened i had already bottled my head with overthinking and i felt like i could have taken a more mature step to handle all of this. I had decided to have girls talk with that girl, perhaps that could help me a bit. I was also being positive that perhaps this incident could also heal our friendship that i had distanced myself from. Before exam, we were sitting on a bench and she herself started the topic about him, I said I don't want to talk about it right now, but she went all like "Arey mujhe pata tha tera katega, tera kat'ta hi hain" (i knew you would get played, you always get played) and started making fun of me and laughing, and she was I am not sorry for this. I literally felt very bad at that moment, even my voice had cracked up, if it had continued then I might have cried a bit because it was becoming exhausting for me. I felt way to vulnerable at that moment At one side I was looking up to make up with her and get stronger as friends and on the other hand she chose to make fun of the thing i told her not to. Even if she say, it's common in friends to roast each other, I would not like it as roasting your friend about something that makes her feel vulnerable is not right, definitely not for me.
After that day i stopped talking to her, no calls no messages no interaction on social media, avoided her as much as i can. Once she asked me why I distanced myself from her, but she was at my home and I could not say loudly about these things as my family wasn't aware of this event. After that we never talked, sometimes I feel I should tell her why i cut ties with her but then i feel she won't care of it. Was I right?

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Does anyone know if at the time you submit the POC-ERP application you must have two years left of school or can you have 1-2 classes left before you achieve your associates/ 2 years completed? For my situation I currently have 5 classes left. Taking two in the summer, and two in the fall. I will have one class left for spring which is when the application is due. My education office is clueless and I haven't been able to get the actual application as well.

I can live easy as a boy but i if i take more time living as a boy ill hate it so i kind off have mild dysphoria i have dysphoria to an extent and if i live as a girl with hrt ill be happy i have euphoria so clearly i am trans+i wore fem clothes some i kind of have euphoria pretty late like when i wear fem i just feel calm but when i think i want to be a girl fully i feel euphoric!!! I just dont understand why some people say that someone can be cis when there trans or be trans when there cis hell no you cant you fools ive tried it is not how it works your cis unless your proven otherwise and when your proven trans you just cant change it is not some game you where an egg silly +add on that when you think your trans and became cis and successeded let me tell you ,you werent trans in the first place ugh how patheitic can people be just pissess me off i am sorry i am angry i have all the right to do so you ruined my life me trying to be cis lmao i am trans and all gender diverse people are trans too thank you .

Hey all,
Long story short, I'm using a part of the Edward Conze translation of Questions of King Milinda to write a final paper on how Buddhism and Daoism handle the concept of "the self" for my Asian Philosophy class. Anyway, you can probably guess from the title that I'm struggling to understand what a certain part of it is trying to say. Here's the excerpt with the part I'm struggling with in bold:

c. Personal identity and Karma The king asked: 'Is there, Nagasena, any being which passes on from this body to another body?' 'No, your majesty!' ' If there were no passing on from this body to another, would not one then in one's next life be freed from the evil deeds committed in the past?' 'Yes, that would be so if one were not linked once again with a new organism. But since, your majesty, one is linked once again with a new organism, therefore one is not freed from one's evil deeds.' 'Give me a simile!' 'If a man should steal another man's mangoes, would he deserve a thrashing for that?' 'Yes, of course!' 'But he would not have stolen the very same mangoes as the other one had planted. Why then should he deserve a thrashing?' 'For the reason that the stolen mangoes had grown because of those that were planted.' 'Just so, your majesty, it is because of the deeds one does, whether pure or impure, by means of this psycho-physical organism, that one is once again linked with another psycho-physical organism, and is not freed from one's evil deeds.' 'Very good, Nagasenal'

I take this to mean that even though the victim of theft didn't originally plant the mangoes, they still got them from somewhere, which means harming the mango victim is by extension harming the original grower. If this is a decent take on it, that's great. But I still don't understand what that means in terms of how Buddhism "preserves karma" from "one life to the next," especially compared to Hinduism.
To be honest, I'm not even using this specific part in my paper. I just found this class extremely interesting and enriching. Really, I'm just asking for some discussion about it!

I, F 19, have been crushing on my brothers best friend, M 21, for quite some time now. I’ve been in denial for months but it was always just a small crush, nothing too crazy. Him and i chat every now and then and last month i felt he was acting a little off. I got alot of mixed signals from him and told a few friends of mine since i thought i was perhaps imagining things. Everyone told me i was delusional and that it was obvious he liked me so i decided to confess. I was however ready to get rejected. Turned out my friends were right and that he did in fact like me, he just didn’t know how to act since i’m his best friends younger sister.
About a week passed and me and my friends are celebrating a holiday by going out drinking and clubbing. My brother and his friends were at the club as well which meant i would see my crush there. However at some point of the night my crush approached me. We shared a bit of small talk til he changed the subject to me telling him i liked him. He asked if i was serious and i told him i don’t joke about things like that and he went on saying ”oh, cause you know i like you too”. He was nervous since my brother could potentially see us together but he went on saying he wanted me to prove i had a crush on him, obviously meaning he wanted me to kiss him. I’m very shy though and i could only bring myself to give him a kiss on the cheek. He called me cute and i recieved one as well. The whole night we kind of clinged to each other a bit but nothing more happened.
After all that we didn’t talk alot and i’m an overthinker so i basically went crazy wondering if it was a joke. He is a busy guy though and he made sure to properly apologize for not being available which i really appreciated. I went out of my comfort zone and asked him if he’d like to hangout some day when he isn’t busy and he replied with 100%.
Here’s the thing though, a few days ago i mentioned i was still waiting for him to make plans with me. His reply was that i am forgetting that i’m his best friends younger sister. It’s been a repeating cycle that he says something but he also backs off when it gets too real.
I feel like i’ve done all that i can to make it possible for us to see each other, i even told my brother who apparently doesn’t really have a problem with it. My crush knows that too but i still don’t understand what’s holding him back. I confronted him about it last night because it’s becoming exhausting for me emotionally. I’m still waiting for him to go on and read it. I appreciate that he isn’t taking things further if he is unsure though. But if this is all it’s gonna be then i feel like it’s better if he just breaks it off and we continue as friends only.
Thoughts ?????