Hi all, I wasn't sure if I should put this here or in the main FtM sub but I figured this might be a better place to post my woes.
Potential triggers: discussion of trauma, PTSD, health concerns, surgery, relationship issues
TL;DR: My partner has a lot of trauma and likely PTSD around caretaking, health issues of loved ones, and surgery, and is having an extremely hard time coping with the fact that I am moving forward with getting top surgery.
So the issue is in the title but there is more context and nuance to this situation, and I want to say outright that my partner (they/them) is extremely supportive of my transition in general and the issue is around the surgery itself.
My partner and I have been together for almost 7 years, and have been married for 3. We got married before I realized I was trans. Before I came out, they were always adamant about not wanting to be married to a man, which made it really challenging for me to want to come out to them and move forward with transitioning when I finally realized that I'm a trans man. That being said, they were supportive of me when I came out as trans about 2 years ago, and have been a great ally and advocate for me in social situations. They struggled a bit with the changes that came when I first started on T, but now they celebrate me and the changes that T has made to my body. Through/because of my transition, they realized they're pansexual, and find me as attractive as they did before T, but it took some time to get here, and they still sometimes struggle with the fact that they're married to a man.
The fact that I transitioned about a year after we got married has been an issue from the get-go, and I think if things had happened in the reverse order, we would both be more satisfied in our relationship. They feel as though they never got to say goodbye to the person they fell in love with. I know that sounds a bit fucked up but I can see where they're coming from, because the person they first met is not who I am anymore. That person was never real to begin with and was more or less a persona that I created to fit into the role that was expected of me, so when I came out, my true personality has come forward, so yes I understand why they feel such grief, and it doesn't mean that they're not also happy for me at the same time (feelings are complicated). This is something we've had a lot of conversations about, and unfortunately I feel that they have some resentment towards me for not realizing my identity before we made a legally binding decision. They don't outright say it, but I get the sense that they feel like I've betrayed them because I came out and started transitioning after we got married rather than before.
Additionally, throughout our relationship, I have struggled with a variety of different health problems. Most recently, I was diagnosed with Hashimoto's thyroiditis about 4 years ago, which was triggered by a non-transition related surgery. My partner was an excellent caretaker when I was at my sickest, but they have quite a lot of trauma from their childhood around caretaking, which was then perpetuated in our relationship. Before my diagnosis and while still figuring out the right medication dosage for me, I was extremely irritable and had a lot of negativity/depression/anxiety which I unfairly took out on my partner. These psychiatric symptoms are part of my Hashimoto's, and I also have quite severe ADHD which was untreated at the time, so you might be able to imagine the poor treatment my partner received when I was quite ill. I lashed out at them over very small things and was just generally unpleasant to be around. Due to brain fog, I can't even remember most of what I said or how I acted, but I know it really hurt them (emotionally/mentally). We have had many conversations about this too, and I have apologized more times than I can count. Since getting my health issues and ADHD under control, my behavior and irritability have been significantly better, but they still bring up that time in our relationship whenever we have a major conflict. They clearly have not forgiven me for this or moved on, even though they said they have. I feel like I will never be able to make up for the hurt and trauma no matter how good of a partner I am now.
Fast forward to the present. I have been on my local top surgery waitlist since March 2023 and just yesterday I FINALLY got scheduled for a consult which is next month. My partner has known that I want top surgery from the beginning, and I waited a whole year after starting T before I even got on the waitlist, to allow them some time to process it. I got a call that I was getting close to the top of the list back in February, which I told them immediately, and I have been keeping them updated throughout the process. Every time I bring it up, they get extremely upset. Crying, wanting to be alone, spending all their time in another room and not wanting to be around me, etc. It's obviously very triggering for them and I believe they have PTSD around this. A few months ago, I sat them down and we were able to have an open and honest conversation about it for the first and only time, and they confessed that they didn't think they could mentally handle being my caretaker again because of what happened before. I accepted this immediately and started thinking about and researching other options for post-surgery care. Their feelings and experiences are valid and I have no problem figuring this out on my own if it means that we can have a healthy relationship. I have friends and family who are more than happy to help, and my health insurance covers most of the cost for a caretaker. I am fortunate enough to be surrounded by many very supportive people who would absolutely help me out post-surgery. Most of my friends are trans (or are the partner of a trans person) and have had (or have experience taking care of someone who has had) top surgery so I am comfortable asking them for help. There are enough folks in my support system that no one person would be overburdened with taking care of me and in fact the two friends I already told about this issue immediately volunteered (without me even asking) to drive me to/from my appointments and take sick days to help me out post-surgery.
However, when I told my partner that they don't need to take care of me and that I could stay with family, ask friends to help out, or hire someone, they were still upset. They said they feel guilty for not being able to take care of me or be there for me as my partner. They've told me they don't think they can handle being in this relationship if I get top surgery because of the guilt around not being able to take care of me. I feel like I'm being forced to choose between living as my authentic self and keeping my relationship. I already know I'm going to move forward with surgery, but I'm really struggling with the idea that it might mean I'm going to lose my partner, who I thought I would spend my entire life with. I would be willing to delay surgery to allow them more time to process, but it has already been over 2 years since I started medically transitioning, a year on the waitlist, a few months since I was told I'd get a consult soon, and they still aren't mentally prepared for this. I'm concerned that there is not enough time in the world for them to be mentally ready for this and I can't just put my transition on hold when they've already had so much time and made no effort to start to process their trauma around this. I am suffering physically and mentally already - I overheat constantly because I'm binding and wearing multiple shirts to hide my chest and binder, my posture has worsened and I have shoulder and back pain I never had before I started binding, and I am limited in what I can do, especially as the weather is warming up, it makes me extremely sad and dysphoric that I can't just take my shirt off and enjoy the water, or join people in a pool/hot tub. I've tried to explain to my partner that this surgery is a good thing and will allow me to be more mentally present and live a happier and more fulfilling life, which they logically understand but don't seem to emotionally get it due to their trauma. They are in the process of getting a therapist, but haven't seen one yet about this particular issue (they have been to therapy for other reasons a few years ago), and they aren't willing to do couple's counseling, saying that they'd rather put that time/energy into themselves.
It makes me really sad that I can't celebrate this exciting transition milestone with the most important person in the world to me, and that they might not even be in my life anymore afterwards. They don't have an issue with me transitioning, just with the surgery. They said if I woke up tomorrow and my chest was totally flat/masculine, that would be completely ok. I understand being concerned about the health risks of surgery and that my recovery will probably be a little more rough than the average bear because of my thyroid condition, but this goes beyond an understandable/regular level of concern imo. I feel frustrated and disappointed with them for not taking steps towards processing this trauma so they can be there for me, especially since it's something we've had so much time to prepare for. I want to be understanding and patient, but I have been for so long already and haven't seen them put any effort into doing the work. I worry that my patience and understanding is what's been keeping this relationship from falling apart when this subject comes up, and that soon I am going to be out of that energy/space for them unless they start putting the effort into working through these issues.
I am also slightly frustrated because I put in a lot of work over the years to address my emotional issues that caused them a lot of pain, but I don't feel like it's recognized, and every time they're triggered, they treat me as if I haven't done any work whatsoever on myself, like we're right back where we were 4 years ago. I have been through many years of therapy and my hormones are stable (including my thyroid), and I'm on ADHD medication that works very well for me. I take care of myself and get my bloodwork done every 3-6 months as needed, take my medications very consistently, have a good sleep and self-care routine, etc., all changes that have helped me be a better partner and person which I feel have gone completely unnoticed. To be honest, I feel like I take care of them all the time. I go grocery shopping, I make sure dinner is on the table every day, I'm the only one that does the dishes, lately I have been doing most of the cleaning except the floors and litter box. I have even done extra projects around the apartment when they mention something they want to do but don't have time/energy for - like hanging up some art that has been sitting around for a while, and organizing shared spaces. I'm still treated like a villian every time they're triggered, no matter what I say or do. They ask me why I hate them and cry for hours if I get into bed an hour later than they do and it wakes them up (they are a very light sleeper), and tell me I'm being mean when I say I wish they had told me how they feel before things get to the point of crisis. I don't know what to expect from them sometimes because they are unclear in their communication. I ask how they are and they say "as fine as I always am" and don't elaborate even when I ask, which I assume to mean that they're okay, when they're actually not okay and they expected me to just know that, so they think I'm being inconsiderate if I move onto a different topic of conversation. We will go days or weeks without having any issues and then all of a sudden, they tell me "I don't think I can do this anymore" because I didn't do the dishes for a day, or there's a stack of mail that's been on the tv stand for a little too long. They say that it's not out of no where and that if I just paid attention, I would see that, but I do pay attention and I ask how they are and I make space for them to share how they're doing, but they don't share their feelings with me until they get so upset that they can't control it anymore. Lately, the only time they share their feelings is when they're upset.
I don't know what I'm supposed to accept because of their PTSD/trauma and I feel so guilty about how I've perpetuated and caused harm to them in the past, so it feels wrong to suggest that they're being unfair to me. At the same time, I don't think I should be expected to put up with being treated like this and thinking that things are totally okay one day, only to be told the next that they don't know if they want to keep doing this. This morning they told me they don't want to come back home, and that I can keep our cat. I don't want to lose them, but at a certain point I can't make someone work through their trauma, and it makes me extremely sad that this relationship isn't worth saving in their mind and they'd rather just leave me when I get surgery than deal with the hard stuff.
I appreciate you if you read all of that. I don't want anyone to tell me to end this relationship because I am not going to do that without giving them a little more time, especially since they are getting ready to start therapy soon. They really are such a wonderful and amazing person and I feel so so lucky to call them my partner. They have so many amazing qualities and we can relate to each other in ways that I haven't been able to with anyone else. They just have a lot of trauma and I am stuck not knowing how to navigate the situation as I continue my transition, knowing that my getting surgery is extremely triggering for them and might end our relationship. I love them a lot and don't want to lose them, but I'm also realistic and have been in toxic relationships before and will end things if I need to. There is nuance to this situation and I am willing to give them grace and be understanding, but at the same time, I also need to make the choices I need to make for myself. This just really sucks and I think at the moment I'd just like some support. If y'all have ever been in a situation like this and your relationship made it through, I'd love to know how. Thanks.

So last night my new boyfriend came over we will call him John and we had a lovely dinner I made and I was so surprised Max my German shepherd was a very good boy bring nice I guess he could tell I liked him. I was wearing a slutty little black dress with a red thong that didn't stay on long, after dinner we sat on the sofa talking and I told him all about my animal loving history and I mean every from when I started to now and he was loving it tell me I was his dream girl he loved that I love being a bitch and having giving my love to dogs and told me never to stop and that he hopes to just join into my relationship with animals as a loving partner and when he said that he kissed me and that turned into hot dirty messy sex he's cock is very large around 10 inches and thick very blessed he's about the same size as max not as thick as Max's knot but still very nice and he loved how loose my body was he's never been with a woman that could take his cock balls deep in there ass, pussy, and mouth with ease and had no problem with him going from my asshole to my mouth or putting my tongue into his asshole as I stroked his cock like I would a horse. It was a nasty delicious night as I was sucking on his cock after cumming inside my ass for the first time Max jumped up and wanted his turn and John spread my ass so Max had a clear shot for my pussy witch he took and that just made John's cock throb even harder in my mouth till he was balls deep down my throat, he loves my no gag reflex and loved how I was a drooling cum filled mess as Max knotted my pussy and filled me with his hot doggy seed John couldn't help himself cumming in my mouth a second big load of delicious cum in my mouth. After that we snuggled the 3 of use for a bit chating and just being close with each other relaxing till the hot smell of John's cock was to much for me to take anymore and I got on my knees like a good bitch and started to lick his balls and cock every delicious inches of him, a big plus got John is that he's a Naturalist like me never using soaps when washing so his nature smell and Manly muck was intoxicating like a animal in heat I couldn't get enough of him he always smelled good but now naked and all hot and sweaty it was to much for me, I was get wet just from his smell and he could 100% tell I loved it asking me if I liked his dirty cock and watching my drooling on him like an animal myself, the second he was starting to get hard I got up and let his throbbing cock slide into my cum filled vagina using Max's cum as lube and I rode hid cock like an animal as he held my little breasts sucking on my hard nipples and I milked another load out of him deep into my vagina and I orgasmed so hard I squirted like a waterfall falling onto his big strong chest. He held me as he's cock relaxed inside me still pretty large even soft and he layed me down only pulling out to lay next to me and kiss me as Max layed between my legs cleaning my vagina and must of passed out because I woke up to my alarm and John made me breakfast so of course before he had to leave for work I sucked him off and got ready for work myself I can't wait to have him over this weekend and hopefully have a couple days to really show him what a good girl I can be for him he said he want to take me out shopping and spoil me I've never had a man want me like him and also he want to let Max meet his dog so hopefully we can have a great 4some one day I know I'm so in love already 😍🥰

My husband and I met online ten years ago and did long-distance between visits until I could move in with him, though I'm pretty sure he may have groomed me (I was 16 and he was 21 when we started talking) but I'm not sure, I'm still working through alot of stuff tbh.
The months leading up to our wedding was when he became emotionally and psychologically abusive, he'd always had a bit of a short temper but now he was quick to deliberately say hurtful things when he got mad. He would throw and break things in front of me when his temper flared, and make threats to hurt me if I didn't stop pissing him off. Sometimes he'd scream insults at me so loudly my ears would ring and I could feel the bass of his voice in my chest from across the room.
He wouldn't give me space during arguments when I asked for it either, he'd follow me from room to room insisting we had to settle things right away; he'd claim I never cared about him if I didn't respond to him, and he'd swear to lock me outside overnight if I tried to go for a walk to calm down. He'd push me until I exploded and then scream at me for being such an abusive bitch. At least twice our neighbours called for wellness checks on me, he would apologise to the officers and we'd pretend that we had no idea our little argument had gotten so out of hand, but as soon as the door closed again it was always my fault; he wouldn't have behaved that way if I had just used my brain and not made him so angry. Its so twisted, the way I provoke him and then play the victim.
Three years of this and too many breakdowns later, I told my family everything I had been hiding from them out of shame and they got me out of there. I'm back home now, preparing to file for divorce but I can't stop feeling so dumb for how much time I wasted on him- and ohmygod, the moneeyy 😩 so much money on visas, travelling, care packages, post cards, letting him spend entire paychecks of mine on weed & video games to make him happy!! All for what?
I know I'm only 26 and I thanlfully got out while still very young, but I'm so angry I wasted a decade of my time being a bangmaid to someones crusty, deadbeat son! All the life opportunities I turned down to sit on skype with him so he wouldn't feel rejected and get depressed; I didn't go to college after graduation, rarely saw my friends and never stayed out late to hang out with them, I haven't even learned to drive!! Talk about setting yourself on fire to keep someone warm 🤦‍♀️
It also haunts me how many red flags I brushed off before we were married that are perfectly neon now! 🤦‍♀️ The way he treats his mom on a bad day, how "all" of his exes were "crazy", the way he fiended over weed like a junkie, how he treated his cats when he was angry, the fact that his 'friends' never reached out despite living in the same area... it goes on. I can't believe the things I used to make excuses for just because I was infatuated with him, I'm so embarassed.
Short or long distance, man or woman, it doesn't matter; always be suspicious of older people trying to persue you- ask yourself whats 'wrong' with them that makes no one their own age interested, and why would they want someone with less life experience and maturity.
And always have a way to get yourself out of there if things ever go badly; be it a rainy day fund, a go bag in the trunk of your car, or having an emergency contact you can rely on to get to you in a pinch. Anyone who gets upset over you trying to protect yourself has something to gain from you being unprotected. A safe person who loves you would feel confident you'd never need to use your escape plan, but glad you had it anyway.
Thanks if you read this far 🌷

The same thing i do every night Pinky, watch youtube and my old favorite shows and go to sleep WAAAAAAAAAAY too late.
This isn't my first rodeo, and it probably won't be my last. Lots of lies and scams but its hard to find the real thing.
I'm just a guy who has a lot of love to give. I recently retired early and bought my first house. Its a bit of a fixer upper but its keeping me busy. Everything in my life has fallen into place, except the person i can share it with. Will it be you? hope so.
Things i like:
gaming, 90s and 2000s tv and music, really bad B movies, reading, settling into old man habits, trying to make dinner without setting off the fire alarm, GREAT jokes and a good trivia partner.
What I'm like:
5'10", ambiguously tan, bearded, former athlete that broke his back and is now semi-disabled. I used to be bedridden, I'm working hard to get my life back, and I'm fairly happy with where im at physically but i have to be realistic that i might never be 100% again. If you want someone to climb Everest with, its probably not going to be me. Love all the nerd stuff, minus anime. Deep reservoir of useless facts, funny stories and on point references. Never married, no kids. Lefty by handidness and political affiliation, Trump voters need not apply. Pics on request.
What i want from you:
Spontaneity, Honesty, loyalty, laugh at my jokes, understand my references. Be able to make fun of me, and laugh when i make fun of you. A good wit, a nice smile. Flirty, touchy, and ok with all the lovey dovey nonsense i wanna do. I'm in it for the long haul, hope you are too. US or Canada based, hopefully we share hobbies (would love a gaming partner, ESPECIALLY if you wanna spread some democracy) Someone i'd find pretty (shallow but it is what it is)
Ill wrap this up before it becomes a novel. I lived a pretty interesting life, ill leave some factoids, see if you can spot the one that isn't true!
I've been banned from a town in rhode island for life for throwing a pizza at a cop.
I've been to the north pole.
I created an elaborate scheme to cheat my way through high school
I was once a celebrities personal assistant
I've been in a porno movie
I'm deathly afraid of walking over bridges
I'll never go to Virginia again for the rest of my life.
PS pm's are way better than chats!

im back again with another story! Apparently i didnt learn my lesson, dating malay guys.
Met Z.A on Tinder last year September. On off chatting for several days. One day, Z.A said that hes looking for casual hookups, no strings attached etc. Asking me will i be down and make a trip to visit him for it. Offering me to go on dates around his place as theres a lot of cafes and stay at his place. Im like err ok, why not, but i didnt go at all. We just talked random things about life and he asked for my number. Then, we moved to whatsapp and continued there for a few more days. He would pop in occassionally, asking me when am i coming to visit him.
Fast forward to January 2024, he said hes on company trip at the state im living in, asking would be down to hangout. I replied “🌚” since its been like 2-3months since our last conversation. He didnt reply. Few days later, i saw him on Bumble and i texted him, saying i saw him there. We texted almost everyday ever since with some calls here and there. We talked about life and some deep conversations.
There was a concert on February which i went with my friends and i had an extra ticket. I asked whether will he be interested to join, he was and offered me to stay at his place. That was when i finally met him. We went for brunch nearby his place and back to his place. Hangout for a while to break the ice and went to the concert.
After several weeks, i have another concert to attend at SG. I told him about it, he offered me to stay at his place again and i agreed. I arrived a day earlier and came back to stay another day. He even went to the airport to drop me off. Occasionally, during our talks, he would ask me whether do i like him etc. He said he does. I would just keep quiet or asked him why? He said im different from the girls he met before. Seems like im breaking a lot of his “firsts” in dating as he told me, i.e PDA. Thats why he fall for me. He would act all cutesy at the same time also masculine. Z.A is buff, dresses nice, works in a bank, pampers and treats girl like a queen, willing to spend, sweet talks, understanding…etc
After that, im headed back home by ETS. He would text me “i miss you” etc. Then, i had surgery and was on MC for a month. He would videocall me while i was in the hospital. He was worried and anxious. On the morning i was discharged, he sent me a long text saying he doesnt want to do these hookup thingy, its killing him inside, feeling ashamed, wants to focus on himself, doesnt want to hurt me further, “work, gym and God”. He also said he cherishes our time together, glad that we met, im his kryptonite, meeting me has been the best experience hes ever had on the app🥹
So we stopped contacting for 2 weeks. He reappeared, saying he saw my ig stories, glad im healing well, doing well and enjoying life. Slowly, we started texting back.
Early April, i told him i will be visiting with a friend to do some shopping, asking him whether would be available to meet up as i had to return something he lent me previously. Immediately, he said yes, would love to. Saying he misses me, barely hanging on letting me go, thinking a lot about us, etc.
We met. We talked. We cried. We became exclusive. We were happy. We discussed that any problems we had, we should work it out together. Lets make this work, etc. We videocalled everyday. We met again after Raya. Brought me to a waterfall and petting zoo date. It was fun!
After that, he went to Sabah for a week for work conference and leisure. Three days after hes back, he came to visit me. I brought him to visit some places and treated him dinner.
The next day, Labour Day, we went to a valley with petting zoo in it. We were enjoying our time together happily. Before heading back, i received a message request from someone, asking do i know him and shes been seeing Z.A for almost a year etc. I asked him wtf is this, he started explaining. I was calm throughout the whole thing. Shed a little tear or two. He was balling his eyes out. I asked him, “why are u doing this” “i dont know, im messed up” “both of us came from the same past, and now u are the one doing it, what are u thinking”. He was crying, seeking forgiveness and kept apologizing. I asked him to show me their conversations. I saw some pretty interesting messages, like “u even flew back with me to meet my mother” “u asked my mom for blessing on her deathbed” etc. I just kept quiet and listening to what bullshit crap he wanted to say. I asked him, do u still love her? He couldnt answer. Means yes lo. He said no, hes more like sympathizing her, wanted to leave but couldnt as she was going thru with her family issues. Tbh, i think hes lying. I asked him when are u planning to tell me about this if ur gf didnt text me? He said before he leaves. I think its bullshit. I highly doubt it. It would go on until one of us discovers.
Turns out the leisure part in Sabah, he spent it with GF instead of his colleague which is what he told me🙃. Turns out the whole time we’ve been communicating, he has a GF. Turns out when we started texting back in Jan, she was away back at her hometown for several months, he was alone and had a wandering eye and we were there to comfort each other with our struggles.
During the drive back, we were silent. I roasted him and even joked with him about his work, gym and God thing. We went to get lunch and gelato before dropping him off at the train station. We talked. We joked. As if nothing happened. I asked him whats he gonna do when he gets back. He said he gonna talk with her, he will be a single man after midnight. One thing he asked, “are u gonna post me on reddit” im like lol “is that ur main concern right now”
He left, saying i love you and see u again. I replied his GF text. She was waiting at his place for an explanation. She was asking lots of questions and i was overwhelmed. I did not answer every one of them as i quite hesitant idk why. She said she would leave his ass and i can have him lol, saying i should let him wine and dine me and leave his ass. He called me when he reached his destination, telling me his thoughts and what he plans to do. He even said he will call me when he settled with GF. He didnt hahaha. The next day, i texted him what happened. Theres he goes, apologizing, seeking forgiveness, saying they reconciled, lots of things to fix with her, settling with her decisions and rules etc. I asked him why is he on dating apps since u have a gf. He said at that time, the gf has a lot of guy friends she always hangout with, to the point lepak at their house. He was insecured, told her he dont like she did those and they would argue everytime about it. So he downloaded it back to stop overthinking and be jealous of it, in case she cheats on him. Then, he blocked me on Whatsapp & Telegram, deactivated his IG, Tiktok and LinkedIn. Basically any social media that i could get to him.
GF still texting me for 2-3more days asking more questions. She said that he really did have feelings for me. In the end, she said we should stop communicating, she couldnt deal with any more stress. She told me that she was mad that he speaks like me, adding “lo” behind words i.e i dont know lo, i dont care lo. I asked why did u take him back? She said she wants focus on things he did right instead of wrong 👏🏻. But she wont forgive and forget. Honestly, its a bunch of crap. I dont trust their words mostly.
I told my friends about this. Few said hes a penakut. One said GF is like “GuanYinMa”, picking up trash.

• i just wanna vent and share my experience. dont bash me for it🥺

tldr: I ran The Portal for some friends, and we all had a good time. I'd call it successful because we had three characters out of 16 survive, one for each person playing, but they didn't get through everything. Could I have motivated better problem solving and a thirst for more exploration?
Background: Last year I fell in love with DCC after reading about it here and elsewhere. I bought a couple bundles and I convinced my friends to let me run it for an impromptu in-person session about a month ago, (We're all in our 40s and in other games so finding time to play is always going to be tricky.) We were all hanging out with them visiting for the weekend, and the DCC rulebook caught my friends eye. Since I had wanted to judge it, I suggested we try it out on their final night in town, and printed out five 0-level four member character sheets from Purple Sorcerer. There were three players, so my plan was to control two(!) of the 0 level sheets as 8 NPCs.
Session 0: This was done right before the first session, so maybe it doesn't count. I did go over how this game wasn't 5e, being less heroic, more deadly, and that the funnel was a way to play the game during the character creation process,
Spoilers follow for The Portal Under the Stars
Session 1: I had them each have a character named Roberts, with "Oldman Roberts" being their weird uncle, telling them about the Empty Star, the portal, and the riches that presumably lied within. They stopped at the town's single pub, gathered the crew, and headed for the portal. Once there, they spent impatiently picked the lock with a "lucky" roll, frying a promising character and setting the tone.
Three more got killed by the spear throwers, including an NPC with 18 intelligence, my bad. Finally, the falconer of the group sent her hawk through, trigging the last spear with no damage. So far I felt okay about how things were going, as they were starting to think laterally. However, nobody picked up the spears or armor until I had some of my NPCs do it.
The large statue room proved to be equally as deadly. The most intrepid of the party were spared, as they were standing under the giant statue, investigating it, when the first PC decided to leave the room, getting instantly BBQed. Another party member sent in her dog, which got fried, but then she got killed after she collapsed in grief beside it. A couple characters dashed through while the statue burned the others, and one genius player did think to pry off the entrance door and use it as a shield, but still four characters and the dog lied burned on the floor by the time the statue ran out of charges. I felt a little bad, since the death toll was already at eight with the judge's dice coming up badly for the PCs nearly every time. Now that I write this, it also seems that I gave the statue six charges instead of five. Oops.
The characters that had gone through the eastern door noped out of there when they saw the bone piles, and we ended up with three PCs following an NPC through the north door. Here's where I made another mistake. Since it had been some time since I had sent the NPC north, I decided that he had picked a fight with the crystal men and been killed. The PCs came in to see the crystal men all standing around the dead NPC and his torch. They took the wrong lesson that a fight was inevitable and immediately attacked. Amazingly, one PC felled two crystal men on his own, but the other two were brought down. With four crystal men still closing in on the last PC in the room we called it a night.
Session 2: About a month later we were able to meet virtually to finish things off, with me gifting the four remaining surviving NPCs to the players. Since I realized that I hadn't emphasized the importance of using luck, I retconned the last room, allowing one PC with a high luck score another chance to trip one of the crystal men with his staff. He succeeded this time with a modest luck burn. The players had figured out the light attraction by then, but refused to metagame, and the selfish PC who figured things out, Stealin' Roberts, refused to tell the others. I suppose this was consistent with his chaotic alignment, so one crystal man did follow them into the Strategy room, falling down the stairs. Three of the PCs finished off the stalker, found the silver figurine treasure, and things were finally looking up for the treasure hunters.
At last, they had made their way into the clay army room. The trailblazing PC wisely turned tail upon seeing the advancing army, going back to smash all of the clay figurines in the strategy room. Not bad thinking, but nope, the warlord wasn't dumb enough to set up a weakness like that. This showed the party how slow the clay soldiers were, as he had plenty of time to do it, but two of them still decided to test the statues' metal. They were quickly skewered by the surprisingly sharp clay spears. The remaining PC in the room ran away and hid in the Gazing Pool room for a few rounds, cowering in terror behind a column.
Meanwhile, one PC made his way through the hallway west of the Monument Hall, cautiously opening the door to the Scrying chamber. SSisssuraaaggg didn't care how cautious he was, the PC lost initiative, and died in one bite. So much for that room.
Three other PCs made their way into the Cheiftains' Burial room, and made short work of the seven skulls with only five points of luck burned. Still, one skull did manage to kill a PC in a single calf chomp. The PC in the Gazing Pool room grew tired of hiding in the dark and groped his way to the burial chamber, so unfortunately nobody witnessed the army fall into chaos after the generals' skulls were smashed. The three reunited survivors looted the chamber and hightailed it out of the tomb, happy to survive.
I couldn't argue with their decision to survive, and I plan to award a luck point to the neutral alignment PC who suggested leaving, but it was certainly anticlimactic! I feel like the scenario is flawed in this aspect. Could I or should I have motivated the players to stay for a little longer? They never really tried to figure out why the place existed in the first place. Leaving was very consistent with the old-school mentality, but maybe not so consistent with the funnel spirit. This scenario was harder than I thought, I even skipped "attacks of opportunity" on retreating PCs to lower the difficulty a bit.
Lesson learned - my snap decision of having 8 NPCs caused problems. The players kept trying to force the NPCs ahead, etc, and it was too much for me to judge my first session while controlling 8 NPCs. Although the players did end up needing the extra spear fodder and that worked out, I should have instead just adjusted the difficulty of the scenario down a little by reducing the number of spear throwers, the number of flame thrower charges, etc.

We've all seen it a million times. An old hero has fallen on hard times. He's lost hope and fallen into despair. Then a plucky young hero arrives at the scene with optimism and spunk that bring back the old man's heroism and remind him of what he once fought for. Maybe our old hero will even have an epic last stand, a heroic sacrifice or both.
This isn't a bad trope in the slightest. Like every other trope, it just depends on how you execute it and incorporate it into the story, and I want to say that this post is 100% subjective. But I'm kinda bored that it's the only story that old heroes experiencing tragedies seem to get. A lot has been said about how the Sequel Trilogy has handled Legacy Heroes like Luke Skywalker and Han Solo, so I won't open that particular can of worms. Instead, I'll focus on The Negotiator himself, Obi-Wan Kenobi.
Like a lot of fans, I did not care for the Disney+ OWK show for a variety of reasons, and one of them was frankly that I already had a version of that story that I liked better in the form of The Journals of Ben Kenobi.
For those who don't know, when MARVEL got the license for Star Wars comics back, their flagship title was Star Wars (2015)/vol. 2 which was initially written by Jason Aaron. Aaron would show snippets of Obi-Wan's journals detailing his low-key adventures on Tatooine in special issues that served as palate cleansers between arcs. This happened for only 3 issues, but The Journals do come into play in multiple ways later.
Why do I love those three issues? For many reasons, but maybe the impeccable voice for Obi-Wan and his small character arc are the two most important ones. Aaron does a great job getting into Obi-Wan's headspace after RotS, showing everything Kenobi had to deal with: boredom, grief, monotony, survivors guilt, despair and helplessness. Obi-Wan had to sit around without much to do because he couldn't train Luke yet, and he had to watch Jabba oppress and bully the people of Tatooine without being able to render much aid. He had to adjust to a new role and a new mission.
But despite all of this, Obi-Wan isn't broken or passive. The Obi-Wan we saw in the ending of RotS was a man on a mission, and the Journals explore what that meant. Aaron's Obi-Wan throws himself wholeheartedly towards his mission. He looks after Luke from a far and protects the Lars farmstead from Tuskens and Jabba's thugs alike. He helps the local Jawas and aids Tatooine residents by recommending them a source of moisture during the great drought. He constantly meditates and trains to someday be able to train Luke, and he's still a badass when he needs to be one despite some rustiness. He saves the lives of both Luke and Owen, and while he falls into despair, the heroism of little Luke inspires hope in him time and again. The comics also have a lot of other great stuff from Mike Mayhew's beautiful photorealistic art (although that is admittedly polarizing), to the complicated relationship between Obi-Wan and Owen, to even Luke being a little badass adorable.
The show on the other hand goes for the "broken man who ultimately finds his strength again" story, which I (subjectively) just find less interesting than the comics balancing Obi-Wan's vulnerabilities and trauma with his inner strength, nobility and heroism. Show Obi-Wan initially feels very passive. He plans to train Luke, but his own connection to the Force is neglected. He cannot render words of encouragement or aid to a fellow Jedi. He initially refuses Bail's request for help even though Leia is just as important as Luke. He's broken and haunted by diapair.
That does make sense for someone who's been through so muc. And Obi-Wan does eventually agree to go save Leia and he does eventually regain his strength. You can even say that the show leads nicely to the comics, which officially take place after it. Whether or not the show's story was well-done is up for debate, but the comics to me personally were much more believable, interesting and in-line with my interpretation of Obi-Wan and what he was up to between RotS and ANH. I especially love the journals' more meditative tone and inner narration.
Also, I have to give a shout-out to John Jackson Miller's Kenobi novel. While we don't get much Obi-Wan POV in it, he is explored wonderfully through the eyes of others. Like in the comics, Obi-Wan is a very active character who retains his tenacity and heroism, but also expresses all sorts of vulnerabilities and trauma.

It’s gunna be a long one so I suggest getting your self a drink get comfy and I’ll try to make it the easiest read I can. As the title suggests this is what happened to me, my wife and our 2 year old son. The lord as my witness everything written is 100 percent true and accurate with many witnesses.
I don’t even know where to start this so I’ll just go from where I feel is relevant, I 31 male moved to Cornwall uk in 2018 then 24 coming up to 25. I moved into a beautiful one bedroom flat with sea views with nothing but a motorbike 1 bag on my back and a starting date for work 18th February 2018.
All was fine everything was going good life was finally looking up I moved from a city to rural countryside breathtaking beaches, beautiful people and I was ready to finally start adulthood. When I moved into my flat I had nothing, absolutely nothing apart from 7 days worth of clean boxers and socks a guitar and some chef whites. The flat was unfurnished apart from a bed frame and a chest of drawers so naturally I would have to buy everything I needed while I was there, I didn’t even have a mattress for my bed. 2018 was a big year for Cornwall as we had the beast of the east, heavy snow (now I like snow and being a northern boy I was used to it but this stuff came down thick and heavy)! As I said I had a motorbike for transport and I was in work when the beast of the east hit and obviously couldn’t ride back home as the snow was about 2 ft deep by the time I left.
So I walk home and as soon as you entered my flat my bedroom was to the right of the front door a cubard directly in front of you my bathroom just to the left and my living room just down the hallway to the left also. In my hall way I had a shoe rack where I always used to put my shoes, now given I had just walked 3 miles in the snow I could swear I put my bike boots on said shoe rack when I got home. Any way I carried on with my evening as normal and played guitar drank a few beers and just generally chilled before getting my head down. I was sleeping on my couch as my mattress hadn’t arrived yet, but the next morning when I woke up my bike boots was in-front of the couch like some one had jumped on them walked up to where I was sleeping and jumped out. Not only that my heater had been pulled out of the alcove it was in and turned on. I passed this off as nothing it was probably just me and I didn’t remember.
Fast forward a few months nearly a year and I’m all settled my flat is great, my work is great life is good. I met a beautiful young lady (that’s now my wife) although we just started as friends. I’m so happy.
How ever I worked on a holiday park as a chef, one day I get a knock on the back door to the kitchen. There was a man that I had been serving all week and he said sorry to bother you but my wife would like a word with you. Now I’m thinking great what have I done now. But she was smiling and happy and said to me is your gf or wife pregnant I had neither at the time, so I responded nope why do you ask? She told me her name it was carrol (forget her second name) she was a head at a spiritual church in wales. She proceeded to tell me I had a little boys spirit following me around and she could see him. I didn’t know how to react, so I just said oh ok really! And took her details added her on Facebook etc etc, now a few months go by things in the flat was getting weird not that I recognised at the time but like things moving / going missing and I just played it off like it was me being tired from work.
Again fast forward a little bit I’m dating my now wife and mother to my children, she’s staying over but she worked evenings till early hours in the morning when i would wait to go pick her up, at this point I had sold my motorbike to buy a car (more practical and I needed one as per the condition where I worked was I had to have a car to collect stock of a morning).
One night she was in work I was sat at my table designing her tattoo for the back of her leg as I love to draw, I used to have lanterns on my table that where on like a metal frame but they could swing. That night I was drawing both lanterns where swinging in unison so I FaceTimed I will call her red (as I don’t wish to identify her by name). While on face time I showed her the lanterns and I stepped away from the table thinking my shading was moving them and the second I did I swear to the almighty lord they stoped dead! Dead centre like they hadn’t even moved. She witnessed this and was like what the ****.
But once again we put it to the back of our minds and fast forward a few days / maybe a week. I used to have a picture of red and her best friend one of them stupid long ones that you get from a photo machine at an arcade, locked behind my intercoms phone. One day we was stood in the living room and i promise no one was near it but this picture came from behind the phone and landed in the middle of the living room floor. We laughed about it at the time and was like oooooo spooky but we was stupid!
So strange things kept happening red hated being in the flat on her own and hated being in my room as I had a built in wardrobe and she would always say she felt uneasy. The strange things never stopped but we always just brushed it off. Until …….
Our son is born now there’s a 2 year gap where my little lad I’ll refer to him as A, the happings never stopped or eased but we would always just pass it off, how ever when A was about 2 he would always talk to him self in the kitchen and say brother, look daddy brother but not a second later he would scream. Any one whos a parent knows there kids sounds and this sound instantly got my back up am talking as a father hearing my son make this noise I was ready to kill, the anger and rage that I felt inside was something I can’t even put into words, my baby boy was terrified of something and fatherly instincts kicked in.
Every morning while at this flat I would wake up with little bumps or marks across my body, but I always thought it was where I slept or how I slept, but red noticed the same time my lad was doing what he was in the kitchen I was waking up with what looked like chain marks around my wrists and arms and sometimes I awoke with scratches not 4 or 5 like a human hand but 3, just 3 linear scratches across my body.
Covid 2.0 come along, we all get locked down now hear I am with a young family so I did my door badge, I got night work as a security guard and red would refuse to sleep with A until I got home she would always say it felt like something / some one was watching her.
Now red had family down, and said family is a medium (at the time I would have laughed at this as I was very much so on the fence). But one night reds auntie was at her mums house and was doing a reading. During this reading she said she become overtaken by an entity she started pulling this horrible smile that my little lad used to do. (I wasn’t there to confirm this). But the next morning red and I and A are out and about in the car just been for hot chocolate when red gets a phone call from her mum.
Are you with T (me) red says yeah why? Her mum says get T and A to mine right now they both need to be saged with a white feather. So at this point I’m like *** off laughing but then I thought **** it I’ll ride the bus to the next stop. I walk into reds mums and her aunt (who I’ve never ever met doesn’t even know my second name) says to me you would have had a little boy, he would have been around 5 now and his birthday is in July.
Truth be told before I moved to Cornwall I had relations with a lady they should have been forbidden and she fell pregnant, but unfortunately lost the baby. How ever she was pulled to one side by a stranger in the street whom said 10th of July he would have been here.
So this lady reds aunt doesn’t know a thing about me but knew this, knew what faces / smirks A used to do and knew about him screaming from the kitchen and climbing up me in panic. She hadn’t seen or heard any of this no one had.
She proceeded to tell me I had a evil entity attached to my back and that’s why i suffer with back pain, this entity was hiding behind the spirit of my unborn and when A seen him or tried to interact with him he would come out from behind my unborn to scare him. He would use A•s fear and trauma as energy to try and make its self stronger as its end goal was me. It was terrorising my son to get to me.
I went white what the actual **** is going on, I spent the next few weeks thinking I was going insane. But things at the flat was getting worse I contacted Carrol and she said go into every room every storage room / cubard every dark space and say if you are not here with love and light then I command you too leave
A was getting more and more anxious in the flat, around this time we had been accepted for a house and one day he was in the hall way, I was getting the hoover out and he kept slamming the door on the cubard shut saying no daddy I thought he was being cute. I was wrong.
As things started to escalate we tried to reach out for help I’ve gone from a sceptic to a full on believer. We went to a witch shop a couple of towns over, the sell crystals candles etc etc. but when we walked in the woman wouldn’t even look at me, I tried to explain my story but A started messing around so I took him out side and this lady said to red no candles or crystals are going to help him with what he’s got she gave red two business cards for 2 white witches.
So let’s fast forward again at this point reds had enough A is unhappy! But we have a new house to move into so we said we would stay in the flat one last night before we go to the new house the next day. Our last night in the flat didn’t last from the second we walked in it felt so cold so unwelcoming just horrible atmosphere. So we packed up and went and slept on the couch in our new house. That was the last time red or A would step foot in that flat.
I had given my notice to my landlord about moving so I was there cleaning with L that’s reds sister and as we are cleaning we are both in separate rooms, she is in the kitchen I’m in the bedroom I hear her scream and then she ran into the room I was cleaning. Turns out this thing was not happy not happy at all. She was cleaning the cubard under the sink and as she tried to close the door she said it felt like something was pushing against it. She let go of it and it slammed shut. I did actually hear it from the bedroom, I told her to calm down it will be ok and we will work together.
I walked into the bathroom now this flats been empty all day I had had a wee when I first got there but other than that, nothing no one had used the bathroom. But when we walked in there was water everywhere sink was soaking wet, shower tray was soaking and the black and glitter tiles where soaked. We just wanted to get the **** done and get out. That night she left and swore she would never go back. Any who
I get reds mum over to sage the flat and she said she hated being in there, and I have 3 friends they are all into the paranormal, and wanted to explore the flat. I allowed them in as they where down on holiday and I’ll call him S is just like me emotionally dead only had two but after he left that flat he got in our friends car, he broke down in full blows tears and said he’s never felt so empty unloved and lonely. Another of our friends said he saw a long thin figure in the living room all in black with no eyes and was not of this world. He said the reason it had no eyes is because the eyes are a portal to the soul and things not of this plain can’t copy the eyes.
Any way let’s move on I left that flat and every time I left I had to say you are not welcome to follow me or attach to me, you are not welcome in my home or around my family you must stay here or go back to where you belong
Me red and A have lived in our new place a couple of years he’s happy no more screaming and running up me, red is comfortable and I haven’t awoke with chain marks since we started living here.
Red has crystals on all entry and exit points, she had the house saged, but on a whole she is happy and content, I am just never allowed to talk about these events infront of her. Last I heard that thing is still at the flat with my little unborn boy and my A•s grandad who did well to protect A.
This is my story that changed me from a sceptical to a firm believer in paranormal entity’s.

How It Ended
by Ethan O’Driscoll
A thrilling Post apocalypse story
Intro
HRV-1
22 July 2024
Dr Olivia Warren Head of Biotech NARU
This is my latest report on the HRV-1 Virus we were instructed to design by the Russian Government.
The HRV-1 is an incredibly viral and infectious Retrovirus similar to HIV. Changes have been make on a genetic level to provide the request modes of transmission and symptoms.
Those symptoms are:

• Profuse bleeding from the mouth, eyes, lips, gums and pores of the skin
• Confusion
• Coma
• Total organ failure leading to death
• Reanimation after death and post-mortem hypo-aggression

This all included in a highly infectious package
The infection vectors are:

• bodily fluids
• contaminated area
• ANYTHING that has come in contact with infected bodily fluids
• airborne droplets

This is by far the most dangerous diseases we’ve ever designed. I pray to god the Russians only want it as a means of deterrent because if they use it I have no doubt it will end the world. The first sample should be ready to ship next week.
Chapter 1
The Outbreak
1 January 2025
Dr Olivia Warren Head of Biotech NARU
I can’t believe the bastards used it. The first cases came in from Kiev in December from there it spread like a wild fire through Europe the death toll now sits at 65 millions. The hordes rampage through city after city by the millions. There is no way to stop this. What have I done.
NATO forces have established a quarantine of Europe but I can’t help but feel like its too little too late. My estimate is that all infected nations in Europe will be consumed within the next month or two. The Corporation has started the construction of a company safe haven for us higher ups. All we can do is hope the construction is complete before this thing breaks quarantine.
15 February 2025
Dr Olivia Warren
The world is ending. Europe is gone. The quarantine is broken. We’ve got cases in Asia, South America, Here at home in the US, Australia and Africa nowhere is safe. I did this.
Infection number right now:

• Africa 100 Million
• Europe 890 Million
• Asia 250 Million
• North America 250 Thousand
• South America 120 Million
• Australia 24 Million

There is no hope
The safe zone is complete at least we are planning on moving all operations and personal within the week. I don’t know how I’m going to live with myself. Dixie is my only saving grace and at least she’ll be safe. I pray for the soul of all those my creation has killed.
20 March 2025
Dr Olivia Warren
Dixie is at the Safe zone.
I can’t live with myself any more. 4 billion people dead
Chapter 2
A New World
My name is Dixie Warren. Daughter of Dr Olivia Warren. Not that I’ve seen her in 15 years. I remember like it was yesterday. She told me to get on that NARU helicopter that she’d meet me at the safe zone. Those were the last words she ever said to me. I was 8 when the world ended.
Its been 15 years since the Outbreak. There isn’t really anything left of the old world. NARU still exists and turns out they created the virus and my mom was the head of the department that did it. They sold it to the Russians hoping they wouldn’t use it but they did.
It was specifically designed to spread and destroy as fast as possible and it did. I left the safe zone 2 years ago after I learned this information. Now I just spend my time wandering from town to town. My training on the NARU security team helps. At least I know all the best places to shoot a Freaker. That's what we call the infected and for good reason. Most of the time you’ll find them wondering around in groups of 5 to 10 if the group gets too big they turn on each other and form a pile of bodies devouring each other. They moan and scream to communicate and once they see you they will hunt you till you kill every last on of them or you get far enough away. They can run and are abnormally strong if there bodies aren’t damaged they’re a bitch to kill but I’m pretty good at it.
Right now I’m outside Richmond I’ve been stuck here for a week waiting for a large horde to move through. I’m hoping to hunt some of the stragglers and re-up on some supplies. A big horde like this usually leave a few hundred behind. My new AR has been waiting for some fun, I’ve got a new red dot and laser so I should be able to pop headshot after headshot but for now I should go find something to eat.
I’ve made it to a small department store outside the town. It looks like the horde is almost gone. Tons of freaks roaming around though. I can hear a few in the store. I’m going to try getting in through the back and take them out.
Made it back home and wow that store was a gold mine. I got food, water, bullets and even some whiskey. I’m going to enjoy the night then its time to hunt some stragglers. Then I’m thinking of going further south maybe New Orleans heard there might be a small settlement out there from another traveller, might be able to get another courier job or at least I’ll be able to stock up on supplies properly after all these years there isn’t much left in the cities to scavenge.
I better get some rest got a long day of freak killing and walking tomorrow.
Chapter 3
The Road to Home
I left Richmond yesterday. It’s a long road to New Orleans I wished I lived in the days when cars worked. NARU are the only people with working vehicles left and they aren’t exactly the sharing type. Its so lonely out here its been weeks since I last saw another living person the only things you see out here in the ruins are freaks by the hundreds. Its hard to believe the whole world was reduced to nothing by something my mom created. I remember her being the kindest most caring person in the world to think that she could create something so destructive is unbelievable. I’ve still got a long way to go the first city I should have to go through is Raleigh.
I’ve been walking for about a day and I can see the ruins from here. Its always so surreal to see the cities now, so desolate so empty. I remember growing up in Seattle, the city lights, the noise it was always so alive and busy. Now they’re all empty husks or mostly empty at least can’t forget about the freaks. Must’ve killed a thousand of them on my way here almost got bitten when one jumped me under an overpass about 10 miles back. Luckily my machete seems to be as good as ever at cutting up freaks. I should make it to Raleigh within the day.
Made it to Raleigh and its a mess, thousands of freaks I could hear the moaning and screaming from a mile away. I’m going to try finding my way around the city no point in trying to fight my way through a wall of freaks.
Heard crying coming from a house I walked past I decided to check it out and I found a young boy name Richie hiding in a bathroom with what looked like his infected parents trying to break the door down. I took both of them down with a clean headshot. The look on his face when he saw them dead breaks my heart. He says they’ve been hiding out in this house for a month or two after there homestead was overrun by freaks. Its a sad story but it gives me hope that people are at least trying to survive and rebuilt. He’s only 16 yet he’s seen so much and has nowhere else to go so I asked him if he wanted to stick with me and he was elated so I guess I’ve got a sidekick now. I’m not complaining should make the long lonely road more interesting. He’s got no combat experience but he can shoot a pistol so I gave him one of my backups at least I always carry extra. We’ve decided to hunker down for the night and do some scavenging before we leave for Charlotte tomorrow. I’ll be nice to have company for once I’ve been alone for so long.
I woke up to a gunshot and Richie screaming in the other room. When I got there I found Richie pale as snow and a little girl that was clearly infected shot lying on the floor. When I asked Richie who it was he replied in a cold distant voice “My little sister”. It was a heart breaking moment in less than 24 hours Richie had lost everyone. That was a feeling I knew too well my mom was all I had my dad died when I was really young and all I knew after the Outbreak before I left the safe haven was NARU but that wasn’t the best place to build personal connections just a bunch of science types that destroyed the world. Not exactly the most social lot and the security forces were just a bunch of military types that didn’t like the fact that as a teenager I was doing better than them in every metric except raw physical strength but even in that I was better than a lot of them. It’s almost time for us to get going I should pack up and make sure Richie’s okay.
We decided to stop by the old gun store on our way out of Raleigh. Richie mentioned seeing it when him and his dad went out to scavenge one time. He says it looked all locked up meaning there’s a good chance that there might still be something left to take. When we arrived there Richie was right it was locked tight it looked like there might be a way in from the roof so we decided to climb up when I got up there I was jumped by a freak that was just waiting but this one was different smarter in a way it heard me climbing up but instead of screaming and jumping off to get me it decided to hide and wait. In my years of freak killing I’ve never seen one that waits and ambushes. I hope this isn’t a sign that the infected are getting smarter. Anyway Richie popped it in the head and we got in to the gun store and what a find it was. I managed to get a brand new Glock 9 with a torch attachment and extended mag to replace the pistol I gave Richie. Speaking of Richie he decided on a 12 gauge pump with a tube extension and a AR-15 with a suppressor, extended mag and front grip. We also found enough ammo to keep us stocked even if we have to shoot our way to Charlotte now that we’re locked and loaded its time to leave this shit hole and start walking to the next shit hole at least for once I won’t be alone.
Chapter 4
The Road to Charlotte
We’d been walking for 60 miles before we were jumped by a gang of thugs. I caught a round to the leg before I knew what was happening Richie was more awake than me and managed to put a round through the bastards chest before his friends jumped out from behind two cars in front of us we managed to take cover behind a ruined car and we returned fire. I could see the thugs had no skill they just fired randomly in our direction while we were in cover I waited till they had to reload and tossed a molotov at one of them burning the bastard to a crisp. Richie rushed the other and unloaded some buckshot into his head. My leg hurts like a bitch. Richie bandaged it up for me he’s really starting to get used to life on the road. Looking at our map it looks like there is a gas station about 10 miles away so I guess I’ll limp my way there so we can hunker down while me leg heals. I still can’t believe I let the bastard catch me lacking but it won’t happen again
We made it too the gas station. The place looks almost perfectly preserved except the group of freaks that were shuffling around outside nothing that we couldn’t deal with. There is a lot of food and water here and we should be safe here while my leg heals. I hope we don’t run into any more problems till then. I trust Richie but he’s still learning and I’m not sure he’d be able to deal with any major problem on his own.
Its been 4 weeks since I took that shot to my leg and I’m feeling a lot better. Richie managed to find some painkiller so he was able to get the round out and everything healed nicely. He really is an amazing guy young and naive but he really is a good person. I don’t know how I did it without him for so long. It nice not being alone any more. I think I’m ready to get moving again we have about another 100 miles left to go before we get to Charlotte so we better get moving.
We’re about 20 miles from Charlotte, the roads been peaceful we ran into a group of survivors living on a pretty well fortified farm about 25 miles back. They were having issues with some freaks hanging around their water pumping station so we dealt with them for them in exchange for some antibiotics to help with an infection Richie got in his leg where he cut himself jumping a fence while a freak chased him before I could dome it. Only god knows how I didn’t get an infection in my leg after getting shot but he did from cutting himself on a rusty fence guess I’m just lucky. After helping them back we continued on our way. Nothing else interesting happened and Richie is looking a lot better and his cut is basically healed. We should get to Charlotte within the day but I want to stop on a hill on the Outskirts to set up base and get a look at the situation in the city because the farmers mentioned that a horde had passed through recently and they usually get held up in cities they should have moved on by now but better safe than sorry
Chapter 5
Charlotte
We made it to the hill outside Charlotte and the place is infested millions of freaks. I’ve never seen so many of them in one place and I think I know why. In the middle of the city is an old NARU emergency treatment centre. A place where all of the cities first infected were sent. A good plan till there were to many of them and quarantine was broken then all it was was a collection of infected right in the middle of the city which lead to the whole thing being infected much faster. I’m guessing this caused most of the freaks to pile and the smell was attracting more. Oh I forgot to mention the smell imagine a pile of thousands of rotting corpses that’s the smell I’m talking about. There’s no chance we’ll be able to get through the city but I need to get to that NARU site. There might be some old documents or something about my mom I need to find out what happened to her. I’ve spoken to Richie and we both agree that we should try and divert the horde away so we can have time to get to the NARU centre.
Richie has volunteered to draw the hordes attention away while I get to the NARU building. The plan is he triggers an explosion at an old gas station on the other side of town while I get to the building and look for information about the virus and what happened to my mom. All I know is that my mom created the virus while working for NARU. I need to find out what happened to her. I hate putting Richie at risk but it needs to be done.
I just heard the explosion and it works thousands of freaks started moving like a tidal wave of flesh towards the sound I hope Richie is on his way to the meeting place at the abandoned NARU checkpoint on the south side of town but I don’t have time to think about it now I’m almost at the NARU centre I need to be as fast as possible
I made it to the NARU centre and it’s covered in bodies there’s no way I can get in it looks more like a pile of living human corpses than a building I’m guessing the freaks all turned on and consumed each other till they were all stuck and fused together. I’m making my way to the NARU checkpoint I hope Richie is already there and safe.
I made it to the NARU checkpoint and reunited with Richie. He was covered in blood and gore. He had to kill hundreds of freaks to make it here. He says he was almost bitten a few times. I can’t believe I risked his life for nothing. I’ll never do it again. While exploring the place I found this.
20 March 2025
Dr Olivia Warren
Dixie is at the Safe zone.
I can’t live with myself any more. 4 billion people dead
The final communication between my mom and NARU it turns out she couldn’t live with the guilt and decided to kill herself. I can’t blame her I would probably do the same if I was the reason the world ended and killed billions of people but it still breaks my heart. I am happy to know she’s dead and not infected lumbering around somewhere.
Richie is exhausted and so am I were going to take a brake here and continue on to Atlanta tomorrow.
Everything is packed up and we’re ready to go. Last night was rough I kept watch while Richie slept I hate to admit it but I think I’m falling in love with him. I never really had a first love I live for 13 years at NARU but I was the oldest kid there by far by the time any of the boys were close to my age I was already jaded and thinking about leaving so I didn’t pay any attention to them but Richie is different when I found him he was so helpless and lost now he’s strong, confident and he’s so loyal to me. I don’t want to speak to soon by I think he might feel the same way I guess time will tell we still have a long road to walk together. Speaking of walking Atlanta here we come.
Chapter 6
Road to Atlanta
We ran into a group of survivors hiding in a shed on the outskirts of Charlotte on our way home two parents and a little girl they were all bitten and waiting to turn they begged us to put them down before they turned so I did but I think it took a toll on Richie. He’s been almost silent since it must’ve reminded him of his parents and little sister I hope the day never comes that one of us get bitten and the other one has to decide whether or not to do it but if it does I hope Richie has what it takes to put me down if not I hope I get to do it myself before I turn but I shouldn’t be thinking about things like that. Thinking about your own death is a pretty sure-fire way to make it happen.
We ran into a pretty large group of infected must’ve been about 20 of them but all of them behaved the same as the one that jumped me on the roof of the gun store back in Raleigh. I guess that confirms that it wasn’t a once off thing but I still wonder what causes it maybe I’ll find out one day. We took them all down and continued on I hate to admit it but I really enjoy killing freaks call it therapy I guess. Richie is running low on ammo for his 12 gauge. There should be a gun store in about 30 miles so we should be able to restock there. My ammo supplies are also running a bit low only got about a hundred rounds per gun left. I know that sounds like a lot but with all the freaks on the roads it barely enough after Raleigh I had about a 500 per gun. Lets hope we don’t run into any large hordes till we get to the gun store.
We made it to the gun store just to find it controlled by 2 less than friendly guys. They opened fire as soon as they same us. We returned fire and we’re about to enter the store. Richie kicked the door down and I rushed in I let of two shots taking down the one guy the other was a second away from filling me with bullets from his Uzi but luckily Richie put a round through his chest and another through his right eye before he could. Thank god. I don’t know what I would do without him. We’ve decided to rest tonight and continue tomorrow morning.
Dixie: “Hey Richie”
Richie: “Hey Dixie”
Dixie: ”How you feeling buddy”
Richie: ”Oh you know always OK”
Dixie: ”That’s good buddy”
Richie: “Hey Dixie thank you for everything you really are the best thing that ever happened to me”
Dixie: ”Don’t mention it buddy I love you”
We’re almost 20 miles away from Atlanta and I’m not hopeful judging by smell. I’m guessing its going to be a lot worse than Charlotte but we’ll have to wait and see.
We’ve made it to the outskirts of Atlanta and its as bad as I thought there are hundreds of body piles almost the size of buildings. The living freaks move around the city streets like blood through the veins of the body. Some of them are engaged in massive fights with other groups ripping each other apart.
We’re going in tomorrow but for now Richie’s hunting while I scope out the area. I hope he brings some venison anything but rabbit. I’m sick of rabbit meat. When he comes back I want to try and cuddle up to him and see what happens
Richie and I have eaten and we’re getting ready to sleep. I asked Richie if I could sleep in his sleeping bag with him. He looked at me like I was crazy but once I insisted I was serious I could see the joy on his face so we cuddled up for the night and went to sleep
Wow it felt so amazing sleeping in Richie’s arms and today everything feels different but in a good way everything just feels more intimate we had an amazing conversation about life this morning and it feels like our bond is on a whole new level. Its time to go explore Atlanta there should be an old NARU field hospital on the North-side of town but we’ve got a whole city to get through before that.
Chapter 7
Atlanta
Atlanta is a nightmare right now we’re stuck in a pharmacy bunch of freaks trying to get to us. I’m busy wiring up a pipe bomb while Richie holds the door then when I’m done BOOM
Richie Move....
BOOM....
Well that’s one way to deal with freaks. Always hate being covered in gore though. We’re near the city centre now and its as bad as we thought the place is infested with freaks every building, street and alley we’ve been fighting for every mile we’ve been moving basically carving our way through the city leaving streets flooded in blood but its worth it I can see the NARU hospital and it looks like I might be able to get in this time.
We’re Exploring the NARU hospital and its a goldmine I found a bunch of old documentation on the virus and even some reports of small towns keeping quarantine for years after the Fall. There’s also apparently an old supply and weapons depot nearby so were going there next.
Richie has been opening up a lot his little sister was out playing when a freak got her. Her parents couldn’t put her down so she turned and bit them he hid in the bathroom for 2 days before I got there and put then out of the misery. I wish I could understand how he feels because I never had anyone except my mom and I lost her so young so it never really affected me. I love him so much. This would be so difficult without him.
We made it to the NARU supply depot and it basically empty I mean it make sense Atlanta was one of the first city to fall due to vast number of infected that moved in from the nearby NARU detention camp. That was a bright idea locking up a bunch infected in one place and expecting the place to last. So the city fell to chaos pretty quickly and NARU withdrew most likely taking everything with them that or it was looted after the city fell doesn’t matter now its almost night and we should get some rest we’re going to camp on a nearby rooftop.
Sitting on the roof with Richie and a fire I can’t help but feel like life isn’t that bad yeah its not what it used to be but I mean I have food and freedom and someone I love what more could someone want from life. Looking out at the desolate streets full of freaks well except the streets we pushed through I see the death of the old world and the birth of a new one.
I should get to sleep we got a long road to Birmingham tomorrow. Its so warm and cosy pressed up against Richie.
Chapter 8
The Road To Birmingham
On our way out of Atlanta we ran into a huge freak and I mean a huge motherfucker must’ve been at least 10 feet tall and covered in muscle it looked like it was made of at least 5 other freaks. He tossed Richie against a car and knocked him out I managed to chop one of its arms off before it threw me 10 feat in the air and I crashed down on my back and passed out when I woke up Richie was putting round after round in the things chest and it still wouldn’t go down to I ran jumped on its back and used my machete to chop the freaks head off and burnt the body with a molotov just to be sure the thing was dead
Richie was pretty beat up and I’m not going to lie so was I my back hurts like a bitch but we keep on going no matter what because we still have each other. Still I wonder how those freaks got combined into that thing. Maybe that’s why they pile the way they do so they can combine into something bigger I remember something in one of the NARU document mentioning the virus being able to cause “cellular recombination” so I wonder if that’s not maybe what happened and if it is it means things are about to get a lot worse and a lot more dangerous.
We’re about 50 miles always from Birmingham now. The road has been pretty quite only the occasional group of freaks and the group of raiders we ran into outside a gas station awhile back but this time we got the drop on them and not the other way round gave all three of them a new hole in the head Richie was worried that they might be survivors till we found Sandra tied up in the gas station bathroom turns out the bastards grabbed her from her family farm during the night a few days ago and have been taking turns on her over and over since then. We agreed to take her home its the least we could do after everything that happened to her. When we got her home we found the place burnt down and her family butchered outside. I’m guessing after they grabbed her the bastards came back to finish the job. She’s decided to stick with us she’s a lot older than me and Richie. She used to be a nurse before the Outbreak she dealt with some of the first infected until NARU took over the hospitals. When things really started to go bad she moved back to Alabama to her old family farm to live with her parents they managed to set everything up before the Fall and have been living there since well till recently. She’s pretty shook about the whole situation but she should be okay in a day or two. We’ve all lost something in this new world.
We’ve made it to the outskirts of Birmingham and the place is a fortress looks like remnants of the US military and NARU have fortified the place they have watch towers, auto-turrents and armed patrols. Also looks like they have a lot of military hardware. I know better than to approach the main gate NARU has a shoot on site order for all there quarantine zones no reason to assume this place would be any different. Still I have to get a look inside. Tonight while Richie and Sandra set up camp I’m going to look around and see if I can find a way in. I have to know what’s going on here.
I’ve taken a look around and I’ve found a way in through an old sewer pipe running into an old factory from there I should be able to sneak into the city and have a look around maybe they have some new information on the virus or at least I should be able to find some weapons for Sandra
Chapter 9
Birmingham
Richie and Sandra are waiting for me back at camp while I go explore the city. I left most of my kit behind except my Glock and combat knife. I’m not planning on getting into any fights and if I do I want the finished as quickly as possible. I’ve made it to the sewer pipe it should lead me to the sewer grate I saw on the other side of the fence from there I should have free reign over the city as long as I avoid the NARU patrols and don’t draw to much attention to myself.
I’ve made it into the city and it looks like something out of a George Orwell novel. Security cameras on every street, I’ve seen security forces beat a man to death and another group drag a young women kicking and screaming into an abandoned building. I hate to say it but I think life is better outside with the freaks than in here. Can’t say I’m surprised there’s a reason I left the NARU security forces and the safe zone. Lets just say civilian life and happiness has never been on their priority list. I can see a NARU supply depot I should be able to get a uniform and standard load out last I remember NARU doesn’t have a way of removing employees from the database so my security id number should still work.
I was right NARU never changes I just used my id to get a brand new NARU-P-2a NARU's home grown assault rifle basically its everything the AR-15 is but better its literally a gun made for killing freaks and you can feel it. I always wished I stole one when I left but I guess better late than never I also scanned through a few of the latest security reports and it seems like big guys like we fought back in Atlanta are becoming more common as well as a new faster infected with razor sharp claws that hunt and ambush their victims. We haven’t ran into one of those yet and I hope we don’t any time soon. I hope Richie and Sandra are okay, they should be we have no shortage of fire-power but I still worry. I’m going to keep taking a look around and maybe find out how they’ve maintained quarantine for so long
Well I got my answer and its not a good one. The NARU higher ups here basically outlawed being sick. Anyone with any symptoms that might be HRV-1 are immediately executed and burnt without exception I guess that’s one way to maintain quarantine but I can’t help but wonder how many thousands of innocent people have died to maintain it.
I think its about time I get out of here and back to Richie and Sandra.
I made it back to camp. I’m so happy to be back with Richie. He went out hunting and brought back a nice fat wild pig for dinner. Sandra is looking a lot better as well she still has that distant look in her eye but that should go away soon
Next stop Montgomery Alabama.
Chapter 10
The Road to Montgomery
I still can’t get it out of my head. The freaks are changing getting more dangerous, if I understand correctly the longer they are infected the more unstable the virus gets leading to mutations. I hope this doesn’t mean that the longer we survive the harder its going to get but there’s no point in worrying about whether or not the freaks are going to be stronger in the future as long as we make sure we get stronger too it should work out just fine. Richie and I are doing really well our love kinda makes everything a lot easier. Gives us a reason if that makes sense Sandra on the other hand is kinda dead weight if I’m being honest but its not her fault. She’s been through a lot Richie and I do our best to look out for her and take care of her. I just wish she’d start to adjust to life out here she still winches every time we take out a group of freaks or thugs and she’s a bleeding heart. Yesterday as we were going past a little abandoned convenience store we heard a little girl crying when we asked what was wrong she said they were trapped and needed help. It was obviously a trap we could see the store was fortified and the little girl looked too happy for a kid whose parents were stuck and dying but Sandra insisted we go in and help and what do you know the kids parents are perfectly healthy and holding us at gun point luckily I’m pretty quick on the draw and managed to put two rounds through the fathers chest and Richie tackled the mom. I walked up to the big dude and put one through the head to make sure the mom learns her lesson. We agreed to let her and her daughter live as long as the promised to stop robbing travellers. Sandra couldn’t handle the fact that I finished the dad off even though I think that was better than leaving his family to watch him bleed out because there was no way he would have survive I shot him through both of his lungs they would have filled up with blood and he would have chocked to death I did him a favour by putting him down but she didn’t see it that way even threatened to go it on her own until Richie and I told her to go ahead if she really thought it was the best thing for her. She then decided to stick with us
We’re nearly at the outskirts of Montgomery, we just passed the old civil rights monument. The roads been a bit too still I have a bad feeling about what we’re going to find when we get there

I'm a 35 year old man who moved here from Singapore 6 years ago with my wife under the Express Entry program.We've since had a child a couple of years ago and live in Whitby, we're also proud Canadian citizens. We grew up in India and of course look Indian, though we can switch accents depending on who we speak to.
We've only had positive experiences and interactions with people since moving here. I work in financial services, and my wife works in healthcare tech. We live in a multicultural neighborhood and have friends of all ethnicities.
Seeing the anti-immigrant talk on social media in the past year has been worrying. It seems like it's just escalated and is boiling over to the real world now. Groups like this one planning a revolt or protest of some sort on Canada Day scare me, especially as a dad of a young child.
I recognize that immigration, especially through the international student pathway has got out of control and that the government needs to change their policies around this. But I worry about being physically attacked now if I'm being honest. And I don't care to an extent if I am attacked, but I worry about the safety of my wife and especially my daughter. We love Canada and have made this our home. We don't want to leave.
Rant over I guess.

We've all seen it a million times. An old hero has fallen on hard times. He's lost hope and fallen into despair. Then a plucky young hero arrives at the scene with optimism and spunk that bring back the old man's heroism and remind him of what he once fought for. Maybe our old hero will even have an epic last stand, a heroic sacrifice or both.
This isn't a bad trope in the slightest. Like every other trope, it just depends on how you execute it and incorporate it into the story, and I want to say that this post is 100% subjective. But I'm kinda bored that it's the only story that old heroes experiencing tragedies seem to get. A lot has been said about how the Sequel Trilogy has handled Legacy Heroes like Luke Skywalker and Han Solo, so I won't open that particular can of worms. Instead, I'll focus on The Negotiator himself, Obi-Wan Kenobi.
Like a lot of fans, I did not care for the Disney+ OWK show for a variety of reasons, and one of them was frankly that I already had a version of that story that I liked better in the form of The Journals of Ben Kenobi.
For those who don't know, when MARVEL got the license for Star Wars comics back, their flagship title was Star Wars (2015)/vol. 2 which was initially written by Jason Aaron. Aaron would show snippets of Obi-Wan's journals detailing his low-key adventures on Tatooine in special issues that served as palate cleansers between arcs. This happened for only 3 issues, but The Journals do come into play in multiple ways later.
Why do I love those three issues? For many reasons, but maybe the impeccable voice for Obi-Wan and his small character arc are the two most important ones. Aaron does a great job getting into Obi-Wan's headspace after RotS, showing everything Kenobi had to deal with: boredom, grief, monotony, survivors guilt, despair and helplessness. Obi-Wan had to sit around without much to do because he couldn't train Luke yet, and he had to watch Jabba oppress and bully the people of Tatooine without being able to render much aid. He had to adjust to a new role and a new mission.
But despite all of this, Obi-Wan isn't broken or passive. The Obi-Wan we saw in the ending of RotS was a man on a mission, and the Journals explore what that meant. Aaron's Obi-Wan throws himself wholeheartedly towards his mission. He looks after Luke from a far and protects the Lars farmstead from Tuskens and Jabba's thugs alike. He helps the local Jawas and aids Tatooine residents by recommending them a source of moisture during the great drought. He constantly meditates and trains to someday be able to train Luke, and he's still a badass when he needs to be one despite some rustiness. He saves the lives of both Luke and Owen, and while he falls into despair, the heroism of little Luke inspires hope in him time and again. The comics also have a lot of other great stuff from Mike Mayhew's beautiful photorealistic art (although that is admittedly polarizing), to the complicated relationship between Obi-Wan and Owen, to even Luke being a little badass adorable.
The show on the other hand goes for the "broken man who ultimately finds his strength again" story, which I (subjectively) just find less interesting than the comics balancing Obi-Wan's vulnerabilities and trauma with his inner strength, nobility and heroism. Show Obi-Wan initially feels very passive. He plans to train Luke, but his own connection to the Force is neglected. He cannot render words of encouragement or aid to a fellow Jedi. He initially refuses Bail's request for help even though Leia is just as important as Luke. He's broken and haunted by diapair.
That does make sense for someone who's been through so muc. And Obi-Wan does eventually agree to go save Leia and he does eventually regain his strength. You can even say that the show leads nicely to the comics, which officially take place after it. Whether or not the show's story was well-done is up for debate, but the comics to me personally were much more believable, interesting and in-line with my interpretation of Obi-Wan and what he was up to between RotS and ANH. I especially love the journals' more meditative tone and inner narration.
Also, I have to give a shout-out to John Jackson Miller's Kenobi novel. While we don't get much Obi-Wan POV in it, he is explored wonderfully through the eyes of others. Like in the comics, Obi-Wan is a very active character who retains his tenacity and heroism, but also expresses all sorts of vulnerabilities and trauma.

I'm a 35 year old man who moved here from Singapore 6 years ago with my wife under the Express Entry program.We've since had a child a couple of years ago and live in Whitby, we're also proud Canadian citizens. We grew up in India and of course look Indian, though we can switch accents depending on who we speak to.
We've only had positive experiences and interactions with people since moving here. I work in financial services, and my wife works in healthcare tech. We live in a multicultural neighborhood and have friends of all ethnicities.
Seeing the anti-immigrant talk on social media in the past year has been worrying. It seems like it's just escalated and is boiling over to the real world now. There's a sub called takebackcanada, they're planning a revolt or protest of some sort on Canada Day against immigration. This scares me, especially as a dad of a young child.
I recognize that immigration, especially through the international student pathway has got out of control and that the government needs to change their policies around this. But I worry about being physically attacked now if I'm being honest. And I don't care to an extent if I am attacked, but I worry about the safety of my wife and especially my daughter. We love Canada and have made this our home. We don't want to leave.
Rant over I guess.

CANCER ZODIAC TAROT READING - UNEXPECTED INCOME MAY 2024

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cJ5mIkLhCyY
cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac dates
10 things about cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac traits
cancer zodiac personality
cancer zodiac symbol
cancer zodiac month
cancer zodiac tattoo
cancer zodiac characteristics
cancer zodiac facts
cancer zodiac sign
cancer zodiac animal
cancer zodiac and capricorn
cancer zodiac art
cancer zodiac aesthetic
cancer zodiac air sign
cancer zodiac astrology
cancer zodiac attributes
cancer zodiac and scorpio
cancer zodiac and aries
cancer zodiac and aquarius
about cancer zodiac sign
all about cancer zodiac
are cancer zodiac dangerous
about cancer zodiac sign girl
age of cancer zodiac
attributes of cancer zodiac sign
after cancer zodiac
animal for cancer zodiac sign
anime characters cancer zodiac
aries and cancer zodiac sign compatibility
cancer zodiac birthday
cancer zodiac bad traits
cancer zodiac birthstone
cancer zodiac best match
cancer zodiac birth dates
cancer zodiac body part
cancer zodiac background
cancer zodiac bracelet
cancer zodiac best friends
cancer zodiac baby girl
best crystals for cancer zodiac
bad things about cancer zodiac
boy cancer zodiac
best match for cancer zodiac
birthday wishes for cancer zodiac
best color for cancer zodiac
best job for cancer zodiac
best stone for cancer zodiac
birthstone for cancer zodiac
bracelet for cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac compatibility
cancer zodiac color
cancer zodiac celebrities
cancer zodiac constellation
cancer zodiac crystals
cancer zodiac color palette
cancer zodiac characteristics female
cancer zodiac compatibility chart
cancer zodiac chinese
cancer zodiac sign dates
cancer zodiac dates range
cancer zodiac description
cancer zodiac days
cancer zodiac demon
cancer zodiac drawing
cancer zodiac daily
cancer zodiac dates 2024
cancer zodiac dogs
cancer zodiac dark side
definition of cancer zodiac sign
dates for cancer zodiac sign
dark side of cancer zodiac signs
dragon cancer zodiac
different types of cancer zodiac
demon cancer zodiac
does cancer zodiac have anger issues
description of cancer zodiac sign
double cancer zodiac
diamond for cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac element
cancer zodiac emoji
cancer zodiac enemies
cancer zodiac explained
cancer zodiac earrings
cancer zodiac energy
cancer zodiac ear piercing
cancer zodiac eyes
cancer zodiac español
cancer zodiac emotionally manipulative
everything about cancer zodiac
evolved cancer zodiac
element of cancer zodiac
evil cancer zodiac
enemy of cancer zodiac
emerald for cancer zodiac
easy cancer zodiac drawing
emotional cancer zodiac
explain cancer zodiac sign
everything you need to know about cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac flower
cancer zodiac flower tattoo
cancer zodiac for today
cancer zodiac female
cancer zodiac favorite color
cancer zodiac famous people
cancer zodiac fire sign
cancer zodiac friends
cancer zodiac facts male
facts about cancer zodiac sign
facts about cancer zodiac woman
fun facts about cancer zodiac
famous cancer zodiac
flower for cancer zodiac
facts about cancer zodiac man
features of cancer zodiac sign
female cancer zodiac sign
friends of cancer zodiac
funny cancer zodiac quotes
cancer zodiac girl
cancer zodiac gemstone
cancer zodiac greek god
cancer zodiac god
cancer zodiac goddess
cancer zodiac gif
cancer zodiac gem
cancer zodiac good and bad traits
cancer zodiac good in bed
cancer zodiac gifts
good things about cancer zodiac
geek bar cancer zodiac flavor
gemstone for cancer zodiac
girl cancer zodiac
gifts for cancer zodiac man
gifts for cancer zodiac woman
gemstone for cancer zodiac sign
girly cancer zodiac tattoo
god of cancer zodiac
gem for cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac horoscope today
cancer zodiac horoscope
cancer zodiac health problems
cancer zodiac horoscope 2024
cancer zodiac history
cancer zodiac house
cancer zodiac hand tattoo
cancer zodiac hair color
cancer zodiac hoodie
cancer zodiac humor
how rare is cancer zodiac sign
happy birthday cancer zodiac
how is cancer zodiac sign
how dangerous is cancer zodiac
how to be friends with a cancer zodiac
how will cancer zodiac die
how to deal with cancer zodiac sign
healing crystals for cancer zodiac
habits of cancer zodiac
herbs for cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac in hindi
cancer zodiac in chinese
cancer zodiac images
cancer zodiac in telugu
cancer zodiac info
cancer zodiac in spanish
cancer zodiac is what month
cancer zodiac in relationships
cancer zodiac information
cancer zodiac in 2024
is cancer zodiac dangerous
interesting facts about cancer zodiac
is cancer zodiac rare
information about cancer zodiac sign
is cancer zodiac rich or poor
instagram bio for cancer zodiac
images of cancer zodiac sign
is cancer zodiac sign lucky
indian celebrities with cancer zodiac sign
is cancer zodiac a water sign
cancer zodiac jewelry
cancer zodiac jobs
cancer zodiac july
cancer zodiac june
cancer zodiac january 2024
cancer zodiac june 21
cancer zodiac japanese
cancer zodiac july 22
cancer zodiac june 27
cancer zodiac july 16
july cancer zodiac
jobs for cancer zodiac
june cancer zodiac sign
july cancer zodiac traits
jewelry for cancer zodiac
june cancer zodiac personality
june cancer zodiac traits
june vs july cancer zodiac
july birthday cancer zodiac
jade for cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac kids
cancer zodiac keywords
cancer zodiac keychain
cancer zodiac kpop idols
cancer zodiac killers
cancer zodiac karma
cancer zodiac know for
cancer zodiac keyboard symbol
cancer zodiac child
cancer zodiac knight
kpop idols cancer zodiac
kpop idols who have cancer zodiac sign
korean actors cancer zodiac
korean celebrities with cancer zodiac sign
katangian ng cancer zodiac
karaang napta cancer zodiac sign
karma cancer zodiac
what kind of person is cancer zodiac sign
things to know about cancer zodiac
everything to know about cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac lucky numbers
cancer zodiac love
cancer zodiac logo
cancer zodiac love language
cancer zodiac lucky colors
cancer zodiac love compatibility
cancer zodiac libra
cancer zodiac lips
cancer zodiac least compatibility
cancer zodiac leo
lucky stone for cancer zodiac sign
logo cancer zodiac
leo and cancer zodiac sign
lucky color for cancer zodiac
lucky wallpaper for cancer zodiac
lucky number for cancer zodiac sign
lunar eclipse effect on cancer zodiac
libra and cancer zodiac sign compatibility
last day of cancer zodiac
love life of cancer zodiac sign
cancer zodiac meaning
cancer zodiac men
cancer zodiac memes
cancer zodiac match
cancer zodiac month dates
cancer zodiac moon sign
cancer zodiac moon
cancer zodiac meaning male
cancer zodiac meaning female
meaning of cancer zodiac sign
male cancer zodiac
meaningful cancer zodiac tattoo
more about cancer zodiac sign
month of cancer zodiac sign
moonstone for cancer zodiac
month of cancer zodiac
male cancer zodiac tattoo
match for cancer zodiac
mlbb cancer zodiac skin
cancer zodiac necklace
cancer zodiac negative traits
cancer zodiac number
cancer zodiac names
cancer zodiac nails
cancer zodiac nail designs
cancer zodiac nicknames
cancer zodiac necklace gold
cancer zodiac neck tattoo
cancer zodiac necklace silver
nicknames for cancer zodiac
names for cancer zodiac girl
nature of cancer zodiac sign
names for cancer zodiac boy
negatives of cancer zodiac
nature of cancer zodiac
number for cancer zodiac
nba players cancer zodiac
names related to cancer zodiac
next to cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac outfits
cancer zodiac origin
cancer zodiac opposite
cancer zodiac opposite sign
cancer zodiac overview
cancer zodiac of the day
cancer zodiac oc
cancer zodiac origin story
cancer zodiac occupations
cancer zodiac other names
opposite of cancer zodiac
one word to describe cancer zodiac
other names for cancer zodiac
outfits for cancer zodiac sign
opal for cancer zodiac
one piece cancer zodiac
october cancer zodiac
onyx for cancer zodiac
another word for cancer zodiac
ox cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac personality traits
cancer zodiac planet
cancer zodiac personality female
cancer zodiac personality male
cancer zodiac pictures
cancer zodiac powers
cancer zodiac pros and cons
cancer zodiac pendant
cancer zodiac power color
personality of cancer zodiac sign
picture of cancer zodiac sign
pros and cons of cancer zodiac
pictures of cancer zodiac sign girl
planet for cancer zodiac
pisces and cancer zodiac sign
power of cancer zodiac sign
pearl for cancer zodiac
peacock cancer zodiac
perfect match for cancer zodiac sign
cancer zodiac quotes
cancer zodiac qualities
cancer zodiac quotes funny
cancer zodiac quiz
cancer zodiac questions
cancer zodiac quote of the day
cancer zodiac quiet
cancer zodiac quiz buzzfeed
cancer zodiac quora
cancer zodiac queen
qualities of cancer zodiac sign
qualities of a cancer zodiac
quotes about cancer zodiac
questions to ask a cancer zodiac
quotes for cancer zodiac sign
quiet cancer zodiac
questions for cancer zodiac
questions to ask a cancer zodiac sign
quiz for cancer zodiac
quora cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac reading
cancer zodiac red flags
cancer zodiac reading today
cancer zodiac ruling planet
cancer zodiac rising sign
cancer zodiac relationship
cancer zodiac reddit
cancer zodiac ring
cancer zodiac range
cancer zodiac rappers
ring for cancer zodiac
ruby for cancer zodiac
rabbit cancer zodiac
red flag cancer zodiac
rappers that are cancer zodiac sign
real cancer zodiac facts
rat cancer zodiac
ruling planet of cancer zodiac sign
random facts about cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac sign traits
cancer zodiac sign meaning
cancer zodiac sign month
cancer zodiac stone
cancer zodiac soulmate
cancer zodiac sign compatibility
cancer zodiac sign tattoo
sign of cancer zodiac
stones for cancer zodiac
symbol for cancer zodiac
stone for cancer zodiac sign
symbol of cancer zodiac sign
scary facts about cancer zodiac
serial killers with cancer zodiac sign
cancer zodiac tattoo ideas
cancer zodiac today
cancer zodiac tattoos for females
cancer zodiac traits female
cancer zodiac traits male
cancer zodiac tattoos for guys
cancer zodiac tarot card
cancer zodiac type
traits of cancer zodiac
things about cancer zodiac sign
tattoo cancer zodiac
types of cancer zodiac
tattoo ideas for cancer zodiac
the meaning of cancer zodiac sign
tattoo cancer zodiac sign
today cancer zodiac
today cancer zodiac sign
today's cancer zodiac horoscope
cancer zodiac urban dictionary
cancer zodiac usernames
cancer zodiac upset
cancer zodiac usa today
cancer zodiac usernames for instagram
cancer zodiac unlucky numbers
cancer zodiac unlucky color
cancer zodiac urdu
cancer zodiac unique facts
cancer zodiac unlucky
unique cancer zodiac tattoos
unique cancer zodiac tattoos for females
ugali ng cancer zodiac sign
understanding cancer zodiac
username for cancer zodiac
urban dictionary cancer zodiac sign
unhealthy cancer zodiac
usa today cancer zodiac
unknown facts about cancer zodiac
unlucky colour for cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac virgo
cancer zodiac vape
cancer zodiac vibes
cancer zodiac videos
cancer zodiac vs scorpio
cancer zodiac vs leo
cancer zodiac venus
cancer zodiac vector
cancer zodiac vs gemini
cancer zodiac vindictive
virgo and cancer zodiac sign
vans cancer zodiac
virgo and cancer zodiac
villains cancer zodiac
vintage cancer zodiac
vintage cancer zodiac charm
venus in cancer zodiac
van cleef zodiac pendant cancer
cancer zodiac in vietnamese
cancer zodiac water sign
cancer zodiac weakness
cancer zodiac woman
cancer zodiac wallpaper
cancer zodiac what month
cancer zodiac water or fire
cancer zodiac worst match
cancer zodiac worst traits
cancer zodiac when mad
cancer zodiac wallpaper aesthetic
what is a cancer zodiac
what month is cancer zodiac sign
what month is cancer zodiac
what color is cancer zodiac
weakness of cancer zodiac
what are the traits of a cancer zodiac sign
what is the meaning of cancer zodiac sign
woman cancer zodiac
what is a cancer zodiac animal
what is good about cancer zodiac sign
cancer x zodiac
zodiac cancer x gemini
astrology cancer x capricorn
cancer zodiac letters
cancer x
cancer x cancer zodiac compatibility
cancer x cancer zodiac
zodiak taurus x cancer
what sign are cancer
x cancer
cancer zodiac year 2024
cancer zodiac yin yang
cancer zodiac year
cancer zodiac yin or yang
cancer zodiac yesterday
cancer zodiac year of dragon
what are cancer zodiac signs
year 2024 for cancer zodiac
yin yang cancer zodiac
year of the dragon for cancer zodiac sign
year of cancer zodiac
youtubers with cancer zodiac
year 2023 for cancer zodiac sign
year of the dragon for cancer zodiac
what year is cancer zodiac sign
what does it mean if you are a cancer zodiac
how to know if your a cancer zodiac sign
cancer astrology zone
cancer zodiac pisces zodiac
why are zodiac cancers so dangerous
cancer about zodiac
cancer zodiac in chinese zodiac
cancer zodiac zodiac
cancer sheep zodiac
zodiac cancer characteristics
zodiac cancer celebrities
zodiac cancer child
zodiac cancer chart
cancer horoscope 0800
cancer zodiac july 07
horoscope cancer 09 juin 2023
are cancers good for cancers
are cancers lucky
cancer sun 0 degrees
cancer 0 degrees
what are cancers sign
why are cancers called cancer
why is cancer called cancer zodiac
what represents cancer zodiac
0 degree cancer astrology
0 degree cancer
0 cancer
cancer zodiac 15 year cycle
cancer zodiac 10 things
cancer zodiac 10
cancer zodiac 18k
cancer zodiac 15th birthday
cancer 101 zodiac
zodiac cancer 16
cancer horoscope 19 march 2024
cancer horoscope 13 december 2023
cancer horoscope 11 march 2024
10 bad things about cancer zodiac
10 things about cancer zodiac male
10 things about cancer zodiac female
100 facts about cancer zodiac
10 facts about cancer zodiac
10 good things about cancer zodiac
10 interesting facts about cancer zodiac
10 facts about cancer zodiac sign
14k gold cancer zodiac necklace
cancer zodiac 2024
cancer zodiac 2024 prediction
cancer zodiac 2023
cancer zodiac 2025
cancer zodiac 2024 january
cancer zodiac 2024 career
cancer zodiac 2023 predictions
cancer zodiac 2024 in hindi
cancer zodiac 2024 march
cancer zodiac 2023 horoscope
2024 for cancer zodiac
2 types of cancer zodiac
2025 for cancer zodiac
20 facts about cancer zodiac
2026 for cancer zodiac
2023 for cancer zodiac
2023 cancer zodiac predictions
2024 prediction for cancer zodiac
2024 lucky color for cancer zodiac sign
2024 color of the year for cancer zodiac sign
cancer zodiac 3 stages
cancer zodiac 3 types
cancer zodiac 3 signs
cancer 3 zodiac
cancer horoscope 31 january 2024
cancer horoscope 30 march 2024
cancer horoscope 31 july 2023
cancer horoscope 30 march 2023
cancer horoscope 30 august 2023
cancer horoscope 30 november 2023
3 types of cancer zodiac
3 stages of cancer zodiac
3 words to describe cancer zodiac
3 facts about cancer zodiac
3 different types of cancer zodiac
3d cancer zodiac sign
3 fun facts about cancer zodiac
august 31 zodiac sign compatibility with cancer
cancer june 30 zodiac sign
cancer zodiac june 30
cancer horoscope 4 march 2024
cancer horoscope 4 april 2024
cancer horoscope 4 may 2023
cancer horoscope 4 january 2024
cancer horoscope 4 october 2023
cancer horoscope 4 april 2023
cancer horoscope 4 september 2023
cancer horoscope 4th december 2023
cancer horoscope 4 july 2023
cancer horoscope 4 june 2023
4 types of cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac wallpaper 4k
cancer zodiac july 4
zodiac sign of cancer 4 letters
what do cancer zodiac sign mean
cancer zodiac rules
4 cancers
zodiac cancer types
cancer horoscope 5 march 2024
cancer horoscope 5 april 2024
cancer horoscope 5 october 2023
cancer horoscope 5 april 2023
cancer horoscope 5 june 2023
cancer horoscope 5 july 2023
cancer horoscope 5 january 2024
cancer horoscope 5 may 2023
cancer horoscope 5 february 2024
cancer horoscope 5 december 2023
5 facts about cancer zodiac
50 cent is a cancer zodiac
50 cent zodiac sign cancer
cancer 5th house zodiac
cancer zodiac sign july 5
cancer zodiac july 5
june 5 zodiac sign cancer
5 cancers
cancer zodiac 69
cancer zodiac 69 tattoo
cancer zodiac 69 meaning
cancer horoscope 6 march 2024
cancer horoscope 6 july 2023
cancer horoscope 6 april 2023
cancer horoscope 6 december 2023
cancer horoscope 6 october 2023
cancer horoscope 6 june 2023
cancer horoscope 6 september 2023
69 cancer zodiac
meaning of cancer zodiac sign 69
cancer zodiac july 6
what does the 69 mean for cancer
cancer born on july 6
cancer big 6 astrology
69 cancer sign
6 cancer causing foods
cancer horoscope 7 march 2024
cancer horoscope 7 may 2023
cancer horoscope 7 september 2023
cancer horoscope 7 july 2023
cancer horoscope 7 june 2023
cancer horoscope 7th may 2023
cancer horoscope 7 november 2023
cancer horoscope 7 august 2023
cancer horoscope 7 april 2023
cancer horoscope 7 february 2024
cancer zodiac july 7
cancer horoscope 8 march 2024
cancer horoscope 8 january 2024
cancer horoscope 8 may 2023
cancer horoscope 8 september 2023
cancer horoscope 8 june 2023
cancer horoscope 8 april 2023
cancer horoscope 8 august 2023
cancer horoscope 8 december 2023
cancer horoscope 8 november 2023
cancer horoscope 8th march 2024
july 8th cancer zodiac
cancer zodiac july 8
signo zodiacal cancer julio 8
what flower represents cancer zodiac
why cancer is dangerous zodiac
what gifts do cancers like
cancer 8h
cancer horoscope 9 june 2023
cancer horoscope 9 may 2023
cancer horoscope 9 march 2024
cancer horoscope 9 january 2024
cancer horoscope 9 april 2023
cancer horoscope 9 october 2023
cancer horoscope 9 september 2023
cancer horoscope 9 november 2023
cancer horoscope 9 august 2023
cancer horoscope 9th april 2023
9 cancer zodiac sign
july 9 zodiac sign cancer
cancer zodiac july 9
what do cancer look like zodiac
what does cancer hate zodiac
9 cancer symptoms
what cancer zodiac sign
what cancer zodiac sign means

For background my wife Lola (38F) and I (37M) are swingers, we have rules and because of those rules it works in OUR marriage. Occasionally Lola will tell her childhood best friend Jessica (40F) about our crazy fun nights, which kinda lead to this ordeal.
So 3 years ago Jessica and her husband started going on a health kick and began drastically loosing weight, my wife and I fully supported this. Jessica would explain that she happily lost 85 lbs while her husband Rodger would complain that the diet makes him miserable he too lost about 45 lbs.
This went on for over 2 years and all things considered they both look amazing. But I noticed that they were getting distant towards each other.
One Friday night in January, Jessica called begging us to pick her up and get her out of her house (some type of trouble at home). So we drive over and instead of us coming in and saying hi to everyone she basically rushes out, saying Rodger was downstairs pissed and refused to come out.
We went to a local pool bar and when we’re asking what the deal was Jessica asks Lola to talk privately. I go to buy the next few rounds and when I come comeback Lola is noticeably shook, face is pale white. I try to press for information but get the “don’t worry about it” although Jessica does let a few thing slip throughout the night. Apparently she and Rodger haven’t had sex in a while and Rodger had started eating out again, constantly. We play our games, enjoy our drinks, then drop Jessica off her house.
Jessica asks me to talk to Rodger and try to cheer him up. Keep in mind I don’t know anything, so I get him a beer from the fridge and join him in the basement. I ask him what gives and instead of talking to me about the subject he brings up baseball stats and starts texting me.
“What would you do if your wife cheated on you? Jess has been having an affair, for over 2 years”
Realizing what he’s doing I start talking about the team’s short stop and wait for the next message.
“The bitch made me starve myself for years, just to make me a cuck. The only reason we’re on that stupid diet and going to the gym is because Jessicas fling wanted her skinny enough to pick up and pin to a wall” Swinger or not, I feel bad for any person who’s being cheated on.
Fast forward through the bulk of his texts, apparently he suspected Jessica of cheating, so Rodger installed security cameras without telling her. Then later that week he had proof, her co-worker Petter “came by to drop off some things” immediately after Rodger left for work, stayed for about 40 mins then left clothes all messed up. When Rodger got home he found used condoms in the trash and dirty lingerie in the hamper. That was roughly last September, in November he confronted her about “thinking” she was cheating, he explained that he wouldn’t ask if she was, but if she was and broke it off, they could do therapy to fix their relationship, basically giving her an out. However he got very depressed and the relationship just kinda fizzled out, keep in mind he was actively telling me this in January.
Apparently that morning Rodger had taken their kids out of school to go to the hospital for a paternity test. (Yes both kids are his, but that act of pulling them out of school caused additional drama) I did what I could to comfort him, asked what I could do to help. He typed he had everything under control but if he did eventually file for a divorce he asked I talk to his lawyer about him getting custody. I said yes and he told me he’d give me more info on Monday.
After that I had to go, my wife and I said our goodbyes then went back up our car. Lola immediately told me Jessica’s side of the story, because yeah we don’t keep secrets at all. Apparently Jessica wanted to be swingers like us. Lola’s stories inspired Jessica to ask Rodger he said no.
Rodger is apparently very Vanilla “missionary only and only for reproduction” kinda guy. And that was ultimately what caused Jessica to cheat with Petter, who did not love her back just liked having a regular FWB.
We both talk about them while driving home and I showed Lola all the texts from Rodger. Which ultimately caused us to fight. Lola got mad at me for saying Rodger was a Victim because Jessica cheated, she forced him to go on a crazy diet and join a costly gym just to further her affair, and that he is justified in demanding a paternity test for their two kids. Additionally if he want to file for divorce that’s understandable but Lola felt Jessica was the Victim (or about to be one) because Rodger went behind her back to conduct the paternity test and his due to depression eventually making it their sex life non-existent, if he wants to try and rebuild their relationship he needs to follow through with the “adult time”. And she says that regardless of the reason behind it the diet did get them in better shape, a the ends justifies the means kinda thing.
Eventually Lola told Jessica that Rodger was thinking about it and that caused a big fight at their house, Rodger left and stayed at his parents house for the weekend. Monday came and went and he didn’t tell me anything so I assumed they tried to repair things.
That following Thursday, Rodger served her divorce papers while she was at work. And he had told Jessica boss about affairs mentioning he had videos proving it (multiple, all 3 months worth of Petter visiting prior to him confronting her, and one dated afterward when she “stopped” seeing him ) Peter and Jessica were both fired shortly after as part of a breach in contract due to inner office relations.
Lola keeps saying I need to help Jessica, since she’s a single mom of two and is about to be homeless and unemployed, apparently since the divorce Jessica’s entire family found out the full details (to include that we’re swingers and have distance themselves from all of us, it’s a small community so the gossip spread around) and no one is helping Jessica except my wife.
It is now May and they have fully divorced. Rodger is finally talking to me again, for a while he assumed we’d played with his wife which I explained no we haven’t. We brought it up once long before they were dating but decided she’s too much of a friend that she’s almost family and it’d be weird. He now has partial custody and although he lost most his things in the divorce, they agreed to sell their house although she’ll get the higher percentage. I took Rodger to find an affordable 3 bedroom for when he has the kids.
My wife says I’m being sexist only helping the guy because I’m a guy. However I feel he is a complete victim here. Regardless what a judge says, his wife cheated and ruined their family. I’m unsure if he went too far by serving her papers at work, he definitely should’ve told her boss about who the other man was but yeah overall I think he’s the victim.
AITA for siding with Rodger?

I am so fucking sad, man.
My mom abandoned me in elementary school. She told CPS I was too dirty. She’s an addict. I then lived with my dad after that, until I was 16 years old and my dad’s girlfriend stabbed me with a knife and I was forced to leave the house. It’s a long story, but, the TLDR is that my dad abandoned me after that & stayed with my abuser. I couch surfed for the rest of high school until I left for the military 4 days after high school graduation. I couldn’t get out of there fast enough.
My dad is also an addict. He was a very heavy drinker for 20 something years until he almost died in March 2022 & spent three weeks in the hospital. He is now sober from alcohol, even up to this day. Four months into his sobriety, he was diagnosed with terminal liver cancer.
I’m 29 now and I’ve been working on my relationship with my dad since he’s been sober. I have been NC with my mom for five years now. My sister is in the military and lives in England, so my dad and I decided to take a trip to go see her. I paid for both of our tickets to come here. We’re here now in the UK. This entire trip he’s been verbally abusing me. If I get upset about him treating me poorly, he gets even more mad at me because he “doesn’t do emotions.” He lashed out at me multiple times in one day & when I tried to talk to him about it, I was met with insults and him mocking me. I asked him to not speak to me like that, and he said that I had to earn his respect in order to get it. He called me a fucking moron in that argument because “I ruined his day by being upset,” and when I told him that hurt my feelings, he doubled down and called me it again.
He then had the audacity later in the day to talk to me about how his parents abandoning him had a profound effect on him. In the same argument I mentioned earlier, he mocked my mental health issues (I hate PTSD from being stabbed as a young girl and I have pretty bad abandonment issues) and he said he laughs at people like me who say they have psych issues.
He gave me a shitty apology at the end of it all and I tried to move on with the vacation. Yesterday we went golfing and he lashed out at me again…. Unprovoked, again, because he didn’t like where my golf cart was parked when I went to take my turn???? Idfk, my sister and I still don’t know why he was so mad.
I bought a house recently and I asked him to come spend thanksgiving with me. He immediately said no, he’s gonna do something with his gf I and her family instead he thinks. That triggered my abandonment issues. I spent most holidays alone after getting stabbed, and when he would show up he would be shit faced drunk.
I just melted down after that. I feel like he just fucking hates me dude. My sister asked me not to bring it up to him because it’s our last night here and she doesn’t know if she’ll ever see him again after this & she doesn’t want her last memory of him to be bad. She is also very avoidant with emotions. I’ve been in my room crying all day. I feel like my love will never be enough for him. All I want is for him to love me like I love him. I feel fucking DUMB for still wanting my dad’s love after almost 20 years of this. I feel like I need to cut the cord finally, but how do I do that when he’s literally terminally ill? I feel horrible 😭💔💔
Tomorrow we go back home to the states. I live in Nevada and my dad lives in Ohio. He’s terminal, idk if I’ll ever see him again either, especially after this. I told him that I feel like he genuinely dislikes me, and all he said was “ok.”
Has anyone else gone through anything like this? How were you able to deattach? It feels truly impossible. Thanks in advance for any positive pearls of wisdom, I don’t have many people in my life to bounce off of and my heart is broken. 😔

I recently played in a band that did an arrangement from The Music Man. I really enjoyed the section where we played "Till There Was You". It had some classic love song vibes. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Spq4IO4_0fU 1:10 - 2:57 for reference (not me in this).
What are some other arrangements that have that warm and fuzzy vibe? Or some solo pieces? I'd appreciate any recommendations!

Hello, I am a Brazilian (if you are too, we can do it in Portuguese) and I am looking for a partner to do an RP that mixes romance, fantasy, and a bit of adventure. If you have other ideas, feel free to share, and we can decide together.
I am looking for women of any age (and who are really women, not a man acting as one, to make it more realistic). I am 18 years old and prefer that our characters be around this age.
My idea (inspired by other RPs I have done) is that we are the only two survivors of an apocalypse that happened in the present times (we can decide what it was: zombies, a virus, or another phenomenon) and now we are forced to recreate society. Even though we don’t initially like each other, over time, after you are already pregnant with the first child (I’m thinking about 6 months), we will start to love each other. It will be a smooth transition, not sudden. We will also enjoy being the last ones on Earth; although we are not friends, we will act like "acquaintances" or even "slightly friends."
I am looking for someone who won’t abandon the RP, or at least will notify me if they plan to. I also hope you understand that we might be in different time zones, so there is no need to respond immediately; I just ask that you try to participate daily (if you can’t one day, please let me know).
To contact me, tell me what you think of the plot (if you want a completely different one, we can try that too), if you want to change something, or even about your character.

A Life Without Cheese
In the serene town of Willowbrook, where rolling hills and lush forests painted the landscape, there resided a man named Oliver. He was a figure well-known in the community, not for any grand accomplishments or flamboyant personality, but for his unwavering devotion to cheese. Oliver's love for cheese was legendary, a passion that bordered on obsession. From the pungent blues to the delicate camemberts, he savored each variety with the reverence of a connoisseur.
On a brisk autumn afternoon, Oliver decided to venture into the nearby woods, drawn by the allure of nature's splendor. As he wandered along the winding trails, a glint of movement caught his eye. Nestled amidst a cluster of fallen leaves, he spotted a peculiar creature—a small, tick-like insect with an unusual yellow hue. Intrigued by its uniqueness, Oliver reached out to examine it closer, unaware of the danger lurking within.
With a sudden flash of movement, the creature sank its minuscule fangs into Oliver's flesh, injecting a potent venom into his bloodstream. At first, Oliver felt nothing more than a slight prick, dismissing it as a harmless encounter with nature. However, as the days passed, he began to experience a series of alarming symptoms.
It started with a persistent itching at the site of the bite, followed by a spreading rash that crawled across his skin like wildfire. Soon, his throat grew tight, constricting his ability to breathe, and his body erupted in violent fits of coughing. Panic surged through him as he struggled to comprehend the sudden onslaught of agony.
Rushed to the town's modest hospital, Oliver was met with a flurry of activity as doctors and nurses worked tirelessly to stabilize his rapidly deteriorating condition. Amidst the chaos, one word hung heavy in the air—cheese. Through a series of rigorous tests and examinations, it was revealed that Oliver had developed a severe allergy to cheese, triggered by the venom of the enigmatic creature that had bitten him.
The news struck Oliver like a thunderbolt, shattering his world into a million fragmented pieces. Cheese, once his greatest pleasure, had become his greatest enemy. The thought of indulging in his favorite delicacies now filled him with a profound sense of dread and despair. The cheeses that had once adorned his kitchen shelves now mocked him from their confinement, taunting him with their forbidden allure.
As days turned into weeks, Oliver found himself ensnared in the suffocating grip of depression. His once-vibrant spirit withered like a flower deprived of sunlight, leaving behind only the hollow shell of a man consumed by sorrow. The laughter that had once filled his home now echoed off its walls, a haunting reminder of happier times long since past.
Desperate to escape the torment of his own mind, Oliver withdrew from the world around him, retreating into the solace of solitude. His friends and family, though well-meaning in their efforts to offer support, found themselves powerless in the face of his relentless anguish. Each day became a battle for survival, a relentless struggle against the invisible chains that bound him to his suffering.
Alone in the darkness of his room, Oliver wrestled with his demons, tormented by memories of a life that once brimmed with joy and vitality. He longed to reclaim the simple pleasures that had once brought him so much happiness, but the specter of cheese loomed over him like a shadow, casting a pall of despair over his every waking moment.
And so, on a cold, moonless night, Oliver made a decision that would irrevocably alter the course of his fate. With tears streaming down his face, he fashioned a makeshift noose from a length of frayed rope and ascended to the rafters of his attic. With each step, the weight of his despair bore down upon him, threatening to crush him beneath its unbearable burden.
In the silence of the night, Oliver's life came to a tragic end. His body swung gently from the rafters, a silent testament to the cruel whims of fate. And as the town mourned the loss of their beloved cheese aficionado, they were left to ponder the fragility of cheese and the devastating power of a passion turned sour.

• Neko_998
  
• _Wishbone22
  
• ChatGPT
  

LIBRA ZODIAC PREDICTIONS MAY 2024

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xttgsAnXHlA
libra zodiac predictions
libra zodiac predictions 2024
libra zodiac predictions 2023
libra zodiac sign 2024 predictions
libra zodiac weakness
libra horoscope predictions today
a libra zodiac sign
a libra and pisces relationship
best libra zodiac matches
what zodiac is libra's best friend
libra horoscope zodiac compatibility
libra zodiac coloring pages
zodiac libra color
libra zodiac daily horoscope
libra zodiac sign horoscope dates traits and personality
disadvantages of libra zodiac sign
daily zodiac libra
what are the zodiac dates for libra
do libra have a dark side
what is the zodiac element for libra
libra astrology predictions for 2023
zodiac predictions for libra
libra zodiac reading for today
february libra horoscope
zodiac libra facts
gemini libra problems
gemini libra and leo friendship
zodiaco libra hoy
horoscope libra health
horoscope libra yahoo
j z zodiac sign
male libra pros and cons
new libra zodiac dates
n zodiac sign
libra zodiac necklace
october libra zodiac
october libra zodiac sign
october zodiac sign picture
october zodiac personality
questions for libra
zodiac libra wallpaper
questions for libra woman
r zodiac
r zodiac signs
libra zodiac sign predictions 2023
libra zodiac sign predictions 2024
libra zodiac sign horoscope today
libra zodiac sign horoscope
libra zodiac sign horoscope 2024
libra zodiac sign horoscope 2023
libra zodiac sign 2023 predictions
is libra the prettiest zodiac sign
libra zodiac horoscope today
libra zodiac personality traits male
virgo libra cusp zodiac sign
wallpaper zodiac libra
wallpaper zodiac sign libra
what is the best zodiac sign for libra woman
zodiac libra horoscope
libra 0 degrees
libra zodiac horoscope 2024
libra star sign predictions 2024
libra star sign 2023 predictions
libra zodiac 2023 predictions
2 libra relationship
2 libra compatibility
3 zodiac signs most likely to break libra's heart
3 zodiac signs libra will likely regret breaking up with
4 libra placements
libra 4
5 libra placements
zodiac libra personality characteristics
9 libra sabian
libra predictions
2024 libra predictions
libra predictions today
libra predictions tomorrow
libra predictions for february 2024
libra predictions this week
libra predictions for april 2024
libra predictions for 2023
libra predictions march 2023
libra predictions for may 2023
libra horoscope august 2023
libra horoscope april 2023
libra horoscope april 2024
libra horoscope astrology
libra horoscope astrolis
libra horoscope april
libra horoscope animal
libra horoscope astroyogi
libra horoscope august
libra horoscope astrostyle
libra august 2023 predictions
2024 predictions astrology libra
libra ascendant 2024 predictions
libra ascendant 2023 predictions
libra april 2023 predictions
libra april predictions
astrological predictions for libra 2023
vedic astrology libra 2023 predictions
astrology predictions libra love
do libras like change
libra horoscope by ganesha
libra horoscope birthday
libra horoscope by susan miller
libra horoscope birth dates
libra horoscope best match
libra horoscope business
libra horoscope bejan daruwalla
libra horoscope by prokerala
libra horoscope by prem kumar sharma
libra horoscope bengali
libra career predictions 2023
libra career predictions
libra horoscope cafe astrology
libra horoscope compatibility
libra horoscope characteristics female
libra horoscope career
libra horoscope characteristics male
libra horoscope.com
libra horoscope cainer
libra horoscope career 2024
libra 2023 career predictions
libra 2024 career predictions
libra horoscope 2024 career predictions
libra 2023 career predictions july
tarot card predictions for libra
libra horoscope dates
libra horoscope december 2023
libra horoscope daily
libra horoscope description
libra horoscope day after tomorrow
libra horoscope december
libra horoscope definition
libra horoscope daniel dowd
libra horoscope daily ganeshaspeaks
libra horoscope details
year of the dragon 2024 predictions for libra
libra december 2023 predictions
daily predictions for libra
libra december 2022 predictions
daily horoscope libra prokerala
libra horoscope predictions today
libra horoscope elle
libra horoscope element
libra horoscope earth sign
libra horoscope español
libra horoscope explained
libra horoscope education
libra horoscope english
libra horoscope elle weekly
libra horoscope education today
libra horoscope elle monthly
libra predictions for 2024
libra predictions for today
libra predictions for june 2023
libra predictions for april 2023
libra predictions for september 2023
libra predictions for july 2023
hagan fox predictions for libra 2023
libra future predictions
saturn transit 2023 to 2026 predictions for libra
libra future predictions 2024
libra february 2024 predictions
predictions for libra
2024 predictions for libra woman
libra horoscope ganesha
libra horoscope ganesha speaks 2023
libra horoscope ganesha speaks 2024
libra horoscope general
libra horoscope ganesha speaks tomorrow
libra horoscope girl
libra horoscope gemini
libra horoscope good days
libra horoscope - google search
libra horoscope gemstone
gemini libra problems
libra horoscope hindustan times
libra horoscope hindi
libra horoscope health
libra horoscope hoy
libra horoscope huffington post
libra horoscope health 2023
libra horoscope health today
libra horoscope health 2024
libra horoscope hindi 2023
libra horoscope honey
libra horoscope 2024 predictions
libra horoscope predictions 2023
libra horse 2024 predictions
libra 2023 health predictions
horóscopo libra hoje
libra prediction in 2024
libra prediction in 2023
libra horoscope in urdu
libra horoscope in urdu weekly
libra horoscope in urdu monthly
libra horoscope in hindi
libra horoscope in urdu 2023
libra horoscope in 2024
libra horoscope in arabic
libra horoscope in chinese
libra in 2024 predictions
libra in 2023 predictions
libra prediction july 2023
libra prediction june 2023
libra horoscope june 2023
libra horoscope january 2024
libra horoscope january 2023
libra horoscope june
libra horoscope july
libra horoscope jessica adams
libra horoscope jan 2024
libra horoscope jonathan cainer
libra june 2023 predictions
libra july 2023 predictions
libra january 2024 predictions
june predictions for libra
libra horoscope kelli fox
libra horoscope kids
libra horoscope kannada
libra horoscope kerala
libra horoscope keen
libra horoscope king
libra horoscope kamal kapoor
libra horoscope knight
libra love horoscope today
libra love predictions 2023
libra love predictions 2024
libra horoscope love
libra horoscope love today
libra horoscope lucky numbers
libra horoscope love life
libra horoscope lucky color today
libra horoscope lucky color
libra horoscope love tomorrow
libra horoscope lucky days
libra lucky numbers predictions
libra prediction march 2024
libra monthly predictions 2023
libra may predictions
libra horoscope month
libra horoscope march 2024
libra horoscope may 2023
libra horoscope march 2023
libra horoscope meaning
libra horoscope march
susan miller libra 2023 predictions
libra may 2023 predictions
susan miller libra 2024 predictions
libra moon sign predictions
libra moon sign 2024 predictions
marjorie orr predictions libra
libra man 2024 predictions
libra moon sign 2023 predictions
libra male 2024 predictions
libra predictions november 2023
libra horoscope next week
libra horoscope november 2023
libra horoscope next month
libra horoscope next week career
libra horoscope november
libra horoscope next week love
libra horoscope name letters
libra horoscope now
libra horoscope next week ganeshaspeaks
libra lucky numbers lottery predictions
libra swati nakshatra 2024 predictions
libra swati nakshatra 2023 predictions
libra november 2023 predictions
libra prediction october 2023
libra october predictions
libra horoscope october 2023
libra horoscope of the day
libra horoscope oracle
libra horoscope overview
libra horoscope of 2024
libra horoscope of 2023
libra horoscope oscar cainer
libra horoscope of this week
libra october 2023 predictions
october 4 2023 predictions libra
libra prediction for this month
libra horoscope personality female
libra horoscope personality male
libra horoscope prokerala
libra horoscope picture
libra horoscope penny thornton
libra horoscope pregnancy
libra horoscope planet
libra horoscope patrick arundell
libra horoscope pinkvilla
libra horoscope partner
powerball libra lottery predictions
libra horoscope quotes
libra quarterly horoscope
questions for libra woman
questions for libras
libra rising predictions 2024
libra rising predictions 2023
libra horoscope russell grant
libra horoscope relationship
libra horoscope reading
libra horoscope rising sign
libra horoscope romance
libra horoscope right now
libra horoscope rob brezsny
libra horoscope reddit
libra rising 2024 predictions
libra rising 2023 predictions
libra prediction september
libra horoscope september 2023
libra horoscope sign
libra horoscope susan miller
libra horoscope september
libra horoscope stone
libra horoscope shqip
libra horoscope susan miller 2023
libra horoscope sign characteristics
libra horoscope saturday
libra september 2023 predictions
libra star sign 2024 predictions
libra zodiac sign 2024 predictions
libra zodiac sign 2023 predictions
libra horoscope today
libra horoscope tomorrow
libra horoscope today love
libra horoscope this week
libra horoscope today in urdu
libra horoscope today vogue
libra horoscope today prokerala
today's libra predictions
libra lotto lucky numbers predictions today
tarot predictions libra
tula rashi predictions
libra horoscope uk
libra horoscope urdu
libra horoscope updated daily
libra horoscope urdu 2023
libra horoscope upcoming week
libra horoscope urdu weekly
libra horoscope youtube
libra horoscope uk 2023
libra horoscope us
libra horoscope univision
libra horoscope vogue
libra horoscope vogue today
libra horoscope vogue india
libra horoscope vice
libra horoscope video
libra horoscope vogue 2023
libra horoscope velida
libra horoscope vice daily
libra horoscope vice monthly
libra horoscope vedic
libra weekly predictions
libra woman predictions 2024
libra horoscope weekly
libra horoscope weekly love
libra horoscope weekly in urdu
libra horoscope water sign
libra horoscope woman
libra horoscope what are they like
libra horoscope work
libra horoscope weekly hindustan times
libra woman 2023 predictions
libra woman 2024 predictions
libra prediction yesterday
libra horoscope yesterday
libra horoscope year 2024
libra horoscope year 2023
libra horoscope yahoo
libra horoscope yearly
libra horoscope yesterday hindustan times
libra horoscope yesterday vogue
libra horoscope yesterday love
libra year 2024 predictions
libra year 2023 predictions
libra zodiac predictions 2023
libra zodiac predictions 2024
libra zodiac predictions
libra horoscope zodiac
libra horoscope zodiac sign
libra horoscope zodiac astrology
libra horoscope zodiac compatibility
libra zodiac horoscope 2024
libra zodiac 2023 predictions
z library premium
z library premium membership
z library project
libra horoscope 11 march 2024
libra horoscope 13 march 2024
libra horoscope 13 march 2023
libra horoscope 1 march 2024
libra horoscope 17 march 2023
libra horoscope 10 march 2024
libra horoscope 14 march 2024
libra horoscope 12 feb 2024
libra horoscope 17 may 2023
libra horoscope 15 march 2024
libra predictions 2024
libra predictions 2023
libra 2025 predictions
libra 2022 predictions
libra horoscope 2024
libra horoscope 2024 ganeshaspeaks
libra horoscope 2024 career
libra horoscope 2024 money
libra horoscope 2024 love life
libra horoscope 2023 for students
2023 libra predictions
libra horoscope 30 march 2023
libra horoscope 31 march 2023
libra horoscope 31 december 2023
libra horoscope 31 march 2024
libra horoscope 30 october 2023
libra horoscope 30 june 2023
libra horoscope 3 march 2024
libra horoscope 30 april 2023
libra horoscope 31 january 2024
libra horoscope 30 november 2023
libra lotto prediction
libra horoscope 4 april 2024
libra horoscope 4 march 2024
libra horoscope 4 july 2023
libra horoscope 4 may 2023
libra horoscope 4 september 2023
libra horoscope 4 october 2023
libra horoscope 4 april 2023
libra horoscope 4 january 2024
libra horoscope 4 december 2023
libra horoscope 4th march 2024
4 libra placements
libra horoscope 5 july 2023
libra horoscope 5 december 2023
libra horoscope 5 june 2023
libra horoscope 5 march 2024
libra horoscope 5 april 2024
libra horoscope 5 may 2023
libra horoscope 5 march 2023
libra horoscope 5 april 2023
libra horoscope 5 october 2023
libra horoscope 5 february 2024
5 libra
libra horoscope 6 october 2023
libra horoscope 6 july 2023
libra horoscope 6 april 2023
libra horoscope 6 march 2024
libra horoscope 6 june 2023
libra horoscope 6 may 2023
libra horoscope 6 december 2023
libra horoscope 6 september 2023
libra horoscope 6 november 2023
libra horoscope 6 february 2024
libra horoscope 7 may 2023
libra horoscope 7 june 2023
libra horoscope 7 april 2023
libra horoscope 7 march 2024
libra horoscope 7 october 2023
libra horoscope 7 december 2023
libra horoscope 7 november 2023
libra horoscope 7 july 2023
libra horoscope 7 august 2023
libra horoscope 7 september 2023
libra horoscope 8 march 2024
libra horoscope 8 august 2023
libra horoscope 8 may 2023
libra horoscope 8 september 2023
libra horoscope 8 june 2023
libra horoscope 8 january 2024
libra horoscope 8 july 2023
libra horoscope 8 april 2023
libra horoscope 8 december 2023
libra horoscope 8 november 2023
800 libra horoscope
libra horoscope 9 march 2024
libra horoscope 9 january 2024
libra horoscope 9 june 2023
libra horoscope 9 august 2023
libra horoscope 9 november 2023
libra horoscope 9 september 2023
libra horoscope 9 may 2023
libra horoscope 9 october 2023
libra horoscope 9 february 2024
libra horoscope 9 october

As someone from the US who only started to keep up last year, I've really enjoyed finding new artists/tracks and it never disappoints me sifting through the years. Some of my favorites from this year that I'll definitely keep:
1.) Nebulossa - ZORAA: I simply have such a big softspot for synth-pop and the style of this song. It's such an easy favorite for me overall
2.) Aiko - Pedestal: Again, it just strikes a chord with me with that indie/alternative style with it, easy keeper
3.) Angelina Mango - La Noia: it's just a an absolute bop, what's more to say
6.) Bambie Thug - Doomsday Blue: I just find it absolutely bewitching. I know it's not going to be for everyone, but I love the push and pulls it takes. Plus, the piano version is a great rendition
5.) Gate - Ulveham: I've always been open to these folk style songs and man does it lure me in especially as folk-rock
Everything is subjective and there's definitely more tracks that I'll probably keep with me, but these just spoke to me the most

From my Fetlife. Prepare for cringefest. Tell me your thoughts about my cringe.
Hello, everyone. I'd like to introduce myself to you.
Ever since I turned 20, I've been dreaming of becoming another woman's housewife (or, as I like to say, a "wifey"), but I've never exactly known how to make it become a reality. I've always been an extremely submissive person and life hasn't treated me very well both for being like that and for trying not to be like that. I score extremely highly in agreeableness and I take great pleasure in serving those I care for. Specifically and preferably, a woman I love and who also loves me. Today, I'm looking for a romantic, ordinary and 100% monogamous relationship with a woman, but one that includes the element of dominance and submission and the possibility of me being her full-time housewife. While she works, I take care of the house. When she comes home, I take care of her. Always very lovingly and completely given to her body and soul as well as to the household's domestic duties. In practice, I want to be the woman in the relationship. I want to go far beyond the basics such as cooking and cleaning: I want to be responsible for doing her nails, her make-up and giving her massages whenever she wants them. I want to learn to cook everything she likes to eat. Maybe even learn gardening to take care of her plants. Perhaps the origin of this is an innate need of mine to be necessary and useful to someone and I guess that is how it is.
Inevitably, I believe this relationship would also include elements of platonic worship. The reason for this is that I have always harboured an adoration for the female figure, the female energy, the female essence and the female appearance. None of this is sexual. In fact, I feel that this element of platonic worship is so strong that I would even feel uncomfortable seeing my dominating partner naked because it would make me feel the same dirty lust for her that I'd feel for porn actresses when I'd watch their movies and I feel that this would be disrespectful to her and to what her image represents to me. This adoration for the female figure is also one of the reasons for my gender transition, which began in September of 2023. I admire the feminine image so much that I want to make it a part of me. I don't like being a man, looking like a man, being treated like a man, behaving like a man and, God fobid, dealing with masculine gender roles. I have an enormous need to feminize my gender expression because that's what makes me happy.
For reasons that are far beyond my control and that may sound cheesy, I always end up seeing women whom I find beautiful to be superior to me. Not in a bad way, but simply in a kind of hierarchy where I'm below them. So, for some reason, I feel fulfilled imagining myself serving them in a completely devoted way. In a way, I can sum myself up as a human Golden Retriever in terms of loyalty, perhaps to pathological levels. Such a level of unexplored and repressed loyalty that I can easily imagine myself getting so deeply involved with the right woman and creating an emotional bond so indestructible that I would go as far as burying a body with her without giving it a second thought. It's as if there were a hurricane inside me waiting for the ideal conditions to form and destroy everything in its path to reach its goal. My goal is domestic servitude within a romantic relationship and this storm inside me will only grow larger and larger over time. I don't see much value in ordinary work as in working for a company. I only see meaning and purpose in domestic work in a relationship for and with a woman I love with great obedience, dedication, submission and gratitude. I don't see myself as a leader, but as someone to be led.
I come from a place where I suffered a lot of verbal abuse directed at my appearance for being too thin and I see that the world today is full of evil people with an evil intent who get off at doing evil things and also of people who omit themselves when they observe evil being done and end up becoming accomplices by omission. All of this makes me really want to put myself in a kind of safe space with someone trustworthy where I don't have to be constantly watching over my shoulder in order to check whether there already are vultures circling me from above waiting for the ideal moment to pounce. I look like an easy victim for predators and I've always attracted them without any difficulty, unfortunately. I am soft and highly sought by them. I want to be able, if only for a few hours, to let my guard down completely knowing that I'm not in danger and that I'm with someone well-intending who, at worst, doesn't wish me harm and, at best, actively cares about my well-being. In other words, a relationship like any other. I very much want and like the idea of giving myself body and soul to a woman who has consideration for me, for whom I have value and who is in charge of the relationship (FLR). As I said, I want to put myself in a situation of total vulnerability in a controlled and safe environment with a person I can trust and who means well. I want to put myself below them in every situation and always put them before myself unconditionally. I want to live under domestic servitude, as well as having a romantic, ordinary, monogamous relationship like any other. If there's no love, there's no point. I can't explain exactly what I feel, but I see this dynamic as the most honest way I can express love to my owner, mistress and friend. This is the rawest and most sincere manifestation of my personality. And please don't get me wrong: I'm not here trying to "cure" myself through BDSM or draw attention to myself by talking about my problems that nobody cares about. I'm just putting all this into context and explaining objective reality as it is, that's all.
I have no idea how I'm going to fulfill this dream and where I'm going to find this woman. I see a lot of profiles here of dommes who are only in it for fetishistic reasons and to make money and that makes me a little sad. But I understand, since a relationship can end up being a very big responsibility and many women don't want this kind of burden in their lives. Not to mention that the temptation of financial gain must be too great for them not to take advantage of. And in an economy like this, I think it will be considerably difficult to find a woman who will want to keep someone at home without generating income just taking care of the household chores. The odds don't seem to be in my favor and the entire setting seems less than ideal.
I feel disgusted by and abhor any fetish scenario that involves the element of being a housewife, maid and the like, especially if it includes elements of humiliation for carrying out such activity. I understand that for some it can be pleasurable, but for me it's despicable. I can't associate being a housewife with something humiliating and if that's your intention with me, don't get in touch. As for sexual activity in general in a relationship, I don't have much to say. Hormone replacement therapy completely obliterated my libido and I see no purpose in any activity that promotes my sexual pleasure. To all intents and purposes, I've become somewhat asexual. I'd accept being penetrated by my domme if she wanted to, since I'd put her wishes before my own, but I feel it's hardly something I'd ask for. I'm much more interested in the emotional side of the relationship than the sexual.
Still on the subject of sexuality, I feel that the word "virgin" isn't accurate enough to describe myself. This word is used to refer to people who have never had sex, which is my case, but I've also never had any other intimate experience with a woman. It's not that I've never had sex, I've never even hugged a woman in bed. I've barely experienced any degree of intimacy with a woman before. I suppose this complete lack of sexual experience will be viewed in a very bad light by the women I seek, but I don't think there's much I can do about it. I have no interest in having these first experiences with, for example, a prostitute because I'm looking for a real emotional connection in a legitimate relationship. I'm a romantic and I have no choice but to wait.
I can't imagine a life in which I allow this dream not to come true. It can't not happen. If it doesn't, I'll have an extremely bitter deathbed full of regrets.
When it comes to the woman I'm looking for, I only have three demands: don't be a drug user (cigarretes included), be a gentle domme and unconditionally monogamous.
My gratitude for you will be eternal and my debt to you unpayable.
I hope the woman I'm looking for is out there waiting to be found.

Hoyi there :3. I am on a grand quest to find love, on the hunt for the most important role in my life to be filled and to fill that for someone else, and that is to be partners (Aka future Spouses, Aka Love for eternity. That whole thing)
Couple ground rules. These are NON NEGOTIABLE AT ALL NOT NEGOTIABLE

1. Never EVER want human kids. Dont have them with you now and never want them please. Please be 100% child free not NEGOTIABLE.
   
2. MALE between 19-23. NO ABSOLUTELY NO one older or younger. Hard rule. Very HARD rule.
   
3. East coast prefered. HEAVILY prefered! Bonus points if you are in the tristate area but east coast is alright
   

Ok now that we got the hard boring ugly rules out the way, lets say the fun stuff. Umm Im a girl thats very short, very very short, I have curly brown hair, I have brown eyes. I have freckles. I am whiteeee skin color. I am an absolute DOG of a girl. I want to love love love you all the time and be with you all the time. Im such a golden retriever as they say, and I want you to be the same. I am looking for my absolute darling of a soulmate, my man for eternity. Thats what I hunt for. :>
What I like (hobbies wise get your head out of the gutter mf!!!)

1. I LOVE ANIMALS ANIMALS ARE MY LIFE
2. I love houseplants a ton
3. I love nature in general and the woods
4. I play some video games
5. I am into anime and other medias, not social media though, most is cancer!

Qualifications to be my boy for eternity: (breathe its not hard I swear)
1 Be extremely affectionate. Please please PLEASE expect and want to be the cutest most affectionate most adorable guy on the planet with me, because thats what I will do with you. Please please love all the cute stuff and dont shy back
2 Please be under 6 foot tall. I know it sounds shallow but Im really short guys please ;-;
3 Please be on the skinnier side. Im small!!!! AHHHH
5 please be serious. I swear. Do not bother me if you want to fool around. In addition respond with a small description of yourself. You dont need to write a ton but dont just say 'hey 😏' either because nope. Just hard pass
6 Love animals. Simple as that
Ok thats all I can think of. Can't wait to hopefully finally meet you my dear. Please. Let's just love each other forever.
(Did you notice number 4 is missing? 🤭 :P)