Work is stressful, even if you are a farmer who only works for themself. Work is work. But humans have worked for thousands, upon thousands of years. I won't say that people have always been happy either, but there was purpose in that hard labor, you had to work the farm to live.
We work to live now, but what is the greater purpose? If you were a farmer, or hunter a long time ago, there was a reason to work, but also a greater purpose. Your tribe benefited from your work, it wasn't just you getting to eat, to wear clothes, to live another day. It was that small group of people you loved, you depended on, and who depended on you.
Now let's look at the modern era. It doesn't matter if you are a blue collar, white collar, or government worker of whatever stripe. Your work does nothing to affect anyone you care about, you work only to pay -your- bills, to keep -your- roof over -your- head. It's been like this for a long time, and the discontent tends to shift depending on what is going on in a given country.
Some people love their jobs because they are, in fact, doing good in the world. This tends to be restricted to various sciences as far as I know, whether it's marine biology, medicine, or astronomy. But these are niche markets, you can't just become any of these. In fact many people later in life wish they could have entered a field like that, but it might be too late, for whatever reason. I've heard it before, read it before, people really want to affect their "tribe" in a positive way.
But no matter where you live, with a few exceptions, there is no actual "tribe." People rage at each other, they argue, they see you as "other", you see them as "other", within the same country, certainly all over the world. You are taught to see other people as different in the workplace, because someone got a raise, and they are held as an "example". I am sure a -lot- of other examples of division in the workplace can be provided, but this post is too long already.
We are divided, we have no purpose, we slave away so that rich people can get richer. We are not helping our communities when we go to work, the stagnation, even degradation, and decay continues. When we punch in for work, our entire day goes to making some rich fuck on a yacht more rich, while the people we care about around us do not directly benefit, other than what little money you bring home.
I say this as a blue collar worker, I know some people are better off, but it's not much different unless you are some high level executive, or CEO, or even better yet some primary shareholder who has invested millions. Nothing we do actually helps our communities. Why should we care about our jobs? We are stuck in survival mode, personal survival mode, and not because we want to be.

Any and all perspectives help more than you know. I don’t have anybody to really talk about this with so any and all guidance or help is appreciated. It’s a lot to read, I might yap but it isn’t without reason lmao.
CONTEXT IS IMPORTANT for the sake of understanding. Sorry if it’s long but any advice/help/opinions would be greatly appreciated, really anything helps. I’m 19 years old and have just finished my spring semester of college. Sort of. I went to a big college first out of town, my main financial aid fucked me over (& didn’t let me know until a week after classes started), so I had to switch at semester to my home state’s university. Anyway, this year was kind of tough for me lost a couple family members & my boyfriend had it rough, lost his best friend and dad within a few months of each other. Then we find out I’m pregnant. I wasn’t sure what I really wanted to do but didn’t get to make that choice either because I miscarried sometime later. The whole situation was hard & my life felt like a fuckfest that came crashing down so I went back to my hometown & figured out stuff with school, finished everything mostly online and passed. While back in my hometown, I stayed with my boyfriend.
My boyfriend is 19 and we’ve been together a year & a half but known and been friends with each other since middle school. We actually dated in the 8th grade until he had to move out of state, then when he came back we started hanging out and here we are. My circle is small & I don’t ever really make or have any friends but he’s my absolute best friend. Even if we wouldn’t have chose to date after he came back to town, I’m convinced we would’ve been good friends. That’s just the type of person he is and we were great friends before (with acknowledgment that we’re not 14 anymore ofc). My family liked him or seemed to at least put on a really good front that they liked him, especially my mom.
It’s a well known fact in my family that my mom and I just don’t get along. She kept me quite literally locked away as the Cinderella child, especially in high school I was kept on a very tight leash when I did go out and do stuff. Yeah I had my fun still when she wasn’t in a bad mood/something didn’t need cleaned/ a child didn’t need to be picked up/dropped off. My friends in high school never invited me ANYWHERE lmao but after a while I just kinda dealt w it to avoid her taking my whole life away. I didn’t know how to use a crosswalk like in intersections until I was 15 lmao I was so sheltered sorry ANYWAYS, I turned 18 and it was like I had a brand new mother for a bit until the fear of me leaving wore off.
Long story short, the summer before I left for college (last summer) I didn’t have anywhere else to go & my only friend wasn’t in any position to help me out so I moved in with boyfriend. My mom did the absolute most, almost got me fired from my job & ambulance ended up being called from how much of a tantrum she threw. It was so ridiculous that she refused to tell anybody what happened when people asked because she said it’s too embarrassing for her.
Just like that, she flipped and was saying some terrible stuff about my boyfriend. He had a VERY rough upbringing which she knows some stuff about. She took that and twisted the narrative to make him seem like some sort of charity case that took advantage of her generous & good graces. She calls him the hungry kid who hung out w her daughter. She said he’s no longer allowed at the house just out of spite. He never ever said a word to her or anybody or about her when she had the worst to say about him, he never was disrespectful or like even showed up to the house idrk what that was for. Even when I moved out & she drained my entire savings I had worked for since I was 15, he never said anything bad about her just that i was going to be okay and he’s gonna help me figure it out. Not only that but she shunned me for a long long time & refused to talk and look at me after I moved out, which made me feel incredibly guilty and like I had to see her and my siblings every single day to compensate. My little brother is 5 and doesn’t really understand but my mom didn’t try to enlighten him or kid proof it, just let him scream and cry and claw at my legs whenever I’d leave the house.
If you’re still reading thank you sm.
Fast forward to today, I went to college, I was pregnant & miscarried, finished my semester and am back in my hometown. Over the breaks in college, I’ve stayed at my moms cause she expected me to and her & I’s relationship has gotten so much better with distance. Between her and boyfriend, they were my biggest support especially with the recent event. But the only conversation they’ve had is when him and I went to talk to my mom in person when I found out I was pregnant. Not sure where she stands with him, I’m sure she doesn’t like him still and probably hates him more since we did technically make her worst fear as a mother come true at age 19.
Im living with her again mainly cause I don’t want to be shunned again and i physically cant deal with the debilitating anxiety and guilt every single day, I wanted to try to focus my energy on healing from my miscarriage with other stuff before I have to start classes at the community college here. Boyfriends house family is getting very challenging for him and is deteriorating his mental health, so he wants to get a place regardless. I really just want my own space where I’m not feeling constantly overstimulated and I miss living with him a lot if I’m being honest. We make the best team and it’s so easy with him. I catch myself getting so excited looking at furniture even from the thrift or cooking meals with him or decorating with our fkn forest of plants combined lmao. I miss him making breakfast for me before I wake up and folding laundry together and grocery shopping with him. He’s paying 6 months rent in advance so I don’t have to worry about getting enough hours & can enjoy my summer and actually rest, both of us have a pretty thick cushion to fall back on too just in case. So finances aren’t a problem I don’t think tell me if I’m wrong please. My mom isn’t too keen on the idea I think she just doesn’t want me to make the same mistakes she made, which I understand all too well because I was also there and she was left with half of every pair of shoes she owned, I mean he took literally half of everything. Even in the case that we do break up and then I’m stuck with an apartment with my ex and have completely fucked myself over, at least I was able to make my own mistake for the first time and learned from it? I don’t know what to tell my mom or how the conversation should go. I don’t wanna be shunned again but then again I’ve never once been able to just do something and justify it with “it’s my life”. Idk, advice/thoughts/bullshit/opinions please please please help. Have a blessed day, thank you. I appreciate your time & input more than you know, I don’t have anybody to bounce ideas around with.

This is going to be long, I'm sorry. It is my first reddit post, and I feel desperate. I'm just wondering if anyone here has ever mended their family ties?
To give context, me (22F), my older brother (25M), and younger sister (17F) grew up in an immigrant household (my brother and I are immigrants, sister first gen) with both mother and father around. Overall, we had a happy childhood. We had family friends and my mothers first cousin living in the same city as us, with her two children around the same age as my brother and I. Fast forward a couple of years, there was family drama and an ending of the family friend group that we had due to petty fights between moms, and we stopped having contact with these people. I was a pretty extroverted child, as was my sister, but my brother was pretty introverted. He had great interests as a child, he loved astrology, reading, and knew everything about cars. My sister loved drawing (as did I), making slime, and reading as well (she's an excellent writer). I had a good relationship with both of them, sometimes getting into fights, but nothing really abnormal. We would go outside to play all of the time, and I would take my sister to the pool with me and my friends during the summer. My brother then got very into video games in high school. It was more of a hobby then, which I think is good and healthy, his grades were still good and he was on the volleyball team so he was socializing and fit. His work ethic was not good though, as he would wait until the last minute to finish his assignments. When he was applying to colleges I remember he didn't really want to do anything. It was a big fight between him and my parents. He started college as a commuter, but this was a pretty difficult time for him and he got pretty depressed. He still had the same work ethic and studying habits that he had in high school. My mother then started to deal with depression, as she was close to my brother and became socially isolated at this time. Her age didn't help, and she started dealing with sciatic pain. I then felt like I had to help her, so I would help her with the house, my sister, and the garden. I enjoyed these things, as I feel my nature is pretty nurturing. I love children and found a love in gardening during this time as well. I worked in retail when I was 17, and have been working in the restaurant industry for about 2 years now. My brother never had a job. My brother was always the golden child and got most of the attention and praise, which I didn't mind because in a way it was motivation for me to do well and live up to him. I was still close with him and my sister during his college years. He graduated with a degree in mechanical engineering in three years, and everyone was so proud of him. This was the year I started at the same college as him, but for biochemistry as I was pre-med. This was the year COVID started. My sister was 12, and I was 18, and my brother 21. My brother didn't apply to any jobs after graduation and would just sit at home playing video games. He played for a year and a half, and my parents got frustrated at him for just sitting at home doing nothing. I spoke to him during this time, and he said he was severly depressed during college, and on the first day he knew he didn't want to do it and wanted to drop out instead. I couldn't understand him, as I always saw education as a privilege and gaining knowledge/learning was so rewarding for me (THINK MALALA). My parents told him he had to get a job or go for his masters. He ended up applying for his masters in computer science, and finished that in two years. Since then, December 2022, he has just been in his room locked away playing video games all night and sleeping all day. My mother has been dealing with depression since he started college, and it took a toll on me during COVID trying to help her. This in turn took a toll on my younger sister as we shared the same room and we had a very close relationship. I ended up developing an eating disorder during the time of COVID (I think due to bad stress management), and I was depressed and weighed close to nothing. I ended up graduating with my undergraduate degree in Biochemistry a year early like my brother, but at the end of my studies I decided I could not become a doctor. I studied for my MCAT and was working on applications and all that, but looking forward, I felt the path of becoming a physician did not align with what I wanted in life. The four years of medical school was fine with me, as I love medicine and would study it for the rest of my life if I could, but the hours in residency and the non-existent balance between work and life during those years (along with the debt of medical school) was not something I could justify doing. I wanted to become a mother (sooner rather than later (which feels stupid now as I don't even have a boyfriend and the disloyalty i've seen in men (not my father) makes me have trust issues)). I was lost and wasn't in a good mental state to begin with. Then, my best friends (American) turned on me and isolated me which made me feel even worse. My sister then became the person that I trauma dumped to, which I see was not a good thing, and she started to become aggressive and took turns on who she would isolate in my family. First it was my dad, then my brother, then my mother, then me. She had phases of who she would consider a friend, and who she hated. It was hard on my whole family. During June of 2022, my grandfather (mothers side) became ill with sepsis due to an untreated UTI (he was a farmer and hated the doctor), and she went back to our country for the first time in 20 years. I wanted to go with her, but I had to stay back and take care of my sister. When she came back after my grandfather's death and funeral, my grandmother was all alone, so I went back to my country to stay with her as her caretaker until she passed in November. During that time, I worked on myself and became healthier. It was easier because I had so much family around, and I made new and great friends who I could relate to. The culture is a lot less stressful and on-the-go than American culture, so I found myself seeing the beauty in life like I did as a child. I was in the village surrounded by nature, which I love, and I finally felt like I fit in, whereas in America I never REALLY fit in. When I came home, my sister was still not talking to me.
Fast forward to recently, I am in a great place mentally and physically. I am back to my normal weight (although I do have issues with my hormones due to my former ED, which makes me scared that I am infertile). I am in school in a direct-entry masters in nursing program, working as a server on weekends, and volunteering with the elderly community with a few very close friends that I love. I've done a lot of self work, and have the mindset of not letting my past define me or stop me from bettering myself. My relationship with my family members is pretty great, individually. My sister is doing better mentally, as she dropped some friends feeding her depression, made some new friends in high school, is working as a host in the restaurant I work in, and has taken up martial arts. She is a very bubbly and laughy person, but she can be very cold if she "hates" you. Her relationship with my mother and brother are still very rocky. My mother still deals with depression due to my brother's "wasted potential", although I think I have helped since coming back because I feel much stronger and know now what I have to do to stay strong for my family and for myself. I understand my sister with both of them. I was also initially frustrated with my mother around my sisters age, but I understand what my mother is/has gone through. My sister deems her as crazy, which I told her was wrong. Her and my brother were never very close, and I feel for her frustration with him. He is always in his room playing video games, never helping around the house, and gets mad at her when she says mean things to my mother. I, too, was frustrated with him. However, I know now that the only thing I can really do is fix myself, I can't fix others if they don't want to change. I understand him in a way too. I think that he blamed school for his depression, but I think he still deals with it in a way today and video games is his outlet. When me and him were her age, we would not even think about saying half of the things she says to my parents. I caught my siblings in a screaming match one day when they thought I had left the house. He was screaming at her about being a b**** (I hate curse words, I think they feed anger) because she called my mother and brother fat a**** that morning for eating some leftovers we had (which I think is terribly wrong on two fronts, as one should never say this to another person let alone their own family, and all of the food we have is for everyone, not just for one person), and she was screaming at him to tell her what he wanted to say for the past 17 years. I intervened and started telling them that it was wrong to be screaming at each other, and that we have to be there for each other because we are siblings. We are each other's first best friends in life, and no one else will understand what we went through together. My sister and I also recently had an argument because she told me that my mother and father were very hard on her for her schooling as a child and that she remembers my mother about to throw a chair at her because of some bad grade, but that I stopped her from throwing it. I don't remember this happening ever. I remember that me and my brother were disciplined as children, and that I would get the most punishment (because I was a more mischievous child), and they were hard on us for school, but I knew it was for our better (remember Malala?). She was much younger than us, so their parenting changed significantly by the time she was born. As a child, she never got hit. I think that she might believe that this actually happened, and the feeling of fear was probably true, but this scene did not happen. My parents were older when they had her, so they were not as playful as they were with us as children, but they did their best. I would always try and give her everything I never had at her age, buying her food and taking her shopping. However, she now eats some form of fast food every day, takes my dad to buy her snacks that she won't share with us (which I told my dad is not okay, even if it is a bonding moment between them which he clings onto, he should teach her to share), and she has no interest in dressing up like she did as a child (she used to change her outfit three times a day, always fashionable). I don't think the fashion thing is a big deal, but I want to give her all of the clothes I wished for at her age.
TL;DR
ANYWAYS, after all that, has anyone ever dealt with a bright child older brother turning into a video game addict with no drive? and a younger sister with aggression and resentment towards family? I want to believe that my sister will get better. I think she should go on vacation with my mother to our home country this summer, as we have cousins her age, and she can see how happy my mother is in our country (instead of the depressed version she is in America). As for my older brother, can I do anything to help him see that life is far more beautiful with real-world social connections, that work can be rewarding (whatever it is that he wants to do), and that his past does not define him or who he could be (even if it takes a lot of self-reflection and work)? If so, how can I do this? Or is it better for me to just focus on my own life, make the goals I want happen, and pray/hope they can find the contentment I have found in life? I don't want to intrude too much, but I want to help them. Family is a very important value in my life, and I think it is for them as well.

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I tried looking at the difference what we maybe lost when we switch to 60fps and performance mode make a lot of screenshots for example Sarah while talking in both modes. Maybe when i saw right the shadows are idk 10% more less lools a little bit more fade and when you zoom in you see more pixels (mostly i find around the eyes while graphic mode still sharp by zoomed in) in the mercury tower your home light on the ofen is weird in performance mode but when you normal play honestly they made a good job and you see maybe beside resolution no difference.
What do you prefer (i cant still decide)
Graphics mode with 30 still? Graphics with 60 fps against the warning in the game? 60 fps performance mode? Maybe 30 and performance mode?
What is your way you like to play?

For context I had made a post on another sub with my situation which I have pasted here. If you wanna skip the story go ahead but it adds a lot of context:
My girlfriend of 6 years broke up with me out of the blue and had sex some random stranger not even two weeks after and now seems like she wants to get back together. I'm confused.
Me and my girlfriend have had a wonderful 6 year relationship. We communicated well, we both had great senses of humor, did almost everything together and had very good intimacy and romance. It was a very healthy relationship. Of course like all relationships there were some issues I was not perfect and neither was she but overall I would say it was a very healthy relationship with a very rare fight.
I apologize for giving so much context but I truly loved her with every fiber of my being and I still do. I have cried and cried and cried. My emotional state has been a wreck and the only thing that held me together was my family and I thank god for them. They were all just as shocked as I was when I broke the news that she broke up with me.
About 6 months ago I noticed some changes in my girlfriends behavior. She seemed to be emotionally unstable. During this 6 months I knew something was wrong and would ask maybe once a week what was going on with her. She would cry and tell me she's just been so stressed with school, her part time corporate job and her upcoming graduation from college. I am 1 year ahead of her so I completely understood where she was coming from or so I thought. I would give her advice tell her how I dealt with it and that it does get easier. It's a large transition and to not put so many high expectations on yourself and would hug her and tell her she would be more than fine. She has had past emotional turbulances over big life events and so did not expect it to last but of course still kept up with her making sure she was good. Even talked to my parents about it.
Then about 3 months before the breakup she would just start randomly crying in bed. Seemed like she wouldn't even look at me, never said “I love you” before leaving and whenever I had a family event she would abstain. Work for her was super stressful and school and combined with her already bad emotional state I figured she just needed some time for her and I was totally okay with that. What I did not appreciate was her not telling me she loved me anymore even if it had just been for a little. It made me feel weird. I told her that she was going through a lot and it was okay to need a little space or sometimes just be a little depressed but not telling me she loved me was hurting me. She agreed and apologized to me. At this time we were also looking for an apartment to move in together and had just got a nice little place. I was incredibly excited and so was she at first and then she just seemed to drop it altogether I had put the 1k security deposit down as she did not have the money but would have a full time job right after college and just told her to pay me half her first paycheck.
I think we can all see where this is going except I felt blindsided. About a month and a half ago she gets home from school and it looked like she had been crying. She said she wanted to break up but wasn't totally sure. I was shocked I asked her if everything was okay what the heck happened and she didn't really say much just that she needed time to think. I agreed. It was a Thursday. She said she was gonna take a whole week to think about it. Well it wasn't a week. That Sunday she gave me her decision in person.
She told me that she did not feel loved by me anymore. That the same spark we had at the beginning of our relationship was gone. I did not plan enough cute dates and things to do and she felt neglected. I didn't even fight anything she said I just listened in a state of shock. She said she also needed to find herself and that she was “young.” she also took a jab at my current job and made it seem like I was wasting my life away. It was my first full time job out of college and I haven't even been here a full year. I had zero plans to stay longer than two years. I begged her to not end the relationship. I asked if there WAS ANYTHING we could do. She said no I cried and held her and she just blankly stared crying too. I helped moved all her stuff out.
This is where I think I made a major mistake as she was leaving I asked her if she was COMPLETELY sure of her decision. She admitted she was unsure still. I explained that maybe we should give it a month. And if she wanted to talk in a month we could under the condition she was still faithful otherwise I would move on completely. I felt this was fair. I still love her very much and seeing her leave completely out of my life would break me.
We said goodbye and she left. I blocked her on everything. I had to otherwise I would texted her, called her and overall been more of wreck. The only thing I did not block her on was her email address as she said she was going to pay for the security deposit and in case she left anything she missed at my place.
I was good with it. Slowly moving with life still heartbroken and in shambles but moving on step at a time. Then out of nowhere about a week and a half after the break up i receive an email saying that she made a mistake and was a bad person and she missed me dearly. I admit I emailed back but then I received another email before I could finish saying to “disregard” what she said. I was mad as all hell and sent back an email telling her to stop fucking with my emotions and to not talk to me until the end of the month in person like we planned. She never responded.
The end of the month comes around. I unblocked her number and texted her to get my answer about talking in person and perhaps getting back together as previously planned. I was expecting a no and had already come to terms with it but she had texted back that she still wanted to talk in person. We had more conversations through text and it was going well. She seemed like she missed talking to me and admitted that she did not appreciate me enough and now saw that I did love her just in my own way.
I thanked her for what she said and also explained that I could have been better in some areas too. It was going great and we talked again like we used to for about 2 days. We were gonna pick a date to talk and she wanted it to be a little later since her finals were finishing up. I agreed but I asked the question that was eating me.
Did she see anyone else?
She admitted to me she did a random man at a bar. They had sex. (for context she was my first and I hers) and it broke me. It fucking broke my ego. It broke my mental state all over again. She apologized profusely and said it was an awful experience and she felt used and disgusted by her actions and that she couldn't even hold off for one month to give me fair closure. I came home from work that day and went into a rage. A rage I have never experienced. I destroyed memories. Crying like a kid who experienced their first broke bone. I couldn't believe it. Not even two weeks after our relationship she fucked somebody else and couldn't even hold out 1 month. It shattered my image of her. I felt Petty for caring so much but loyalty is important to me. Always has been and she knew that.
But she said she also wants to make this work and still talk in person. I agreed to the in person meeting as I have questions now. But I don't know to do. My rage passed and now I am just confused. I talked to my dad about it and he said I need to move on she showed her true colors. But at the same time I feel petty and like I could see past this if she really did regret it. I'm torn on what to do. I want to move on with my life and leave it at that. But I also still love her deeply. I'm broken mostly at the end of the day. I don't know what to do.
Anyways now that the story is over aka my life I think she cheated and if she didn’t cheat she was emotionally cheating. Personally I find the whole “random guy at a bar” story to be completely asinine and downright insane. Even if this is somehow actually true there’s a pretty good chance it isn’t and considering she’s already broken up with me and I have no intentions of getting back together I could care less if she actually tells me. But all the signs are there. I believe my GF broke up with me after some guy started giving her attention and may have been emotionally cheating on me and finally did the deed after we broke up (not even 2 weeks after mind you she had sex with this guy.) I pushed the day to talk in person back a bit more as I felt I was mentally wasn’t ready and I am not flaking out this time. Any suggestions on what to ask or say to get it out of her and get the truth?

I wanted to write this as an extended discussion for a similar post about misogyny against Emily and a comment on another similar post.
I want to take a different approach when trying to explain misogyny in this show. We all know that a traditional heteronormative household is supposedly set up in a way where there is a single income provided for by the husband, and the wife runs everything else. The fairness of this setup is always argued, but that is irrelevant because that was not how the Gilmore Household functioned. Here's why. Richard's job was NOT essential for their life. Richard's work was no more significant than Emily's social engagement, which he always ridiculed her for. In fact, Richard's career was built on Emily's efforts to keep them socially connected. Despite this, Richard took major financial risks without consulting Emily—his business venture, where he put up his pension as collateral. Richard's main goal in life was to feel important. He wanted to wear a suit, sit at a desk, and have a conversation. Emily, on the other hand, wanted more social recognition among her circles. She wanted things, petty as they may be, like being served the first tea at the party. Those goals required active social engagement and contributions. Yet Richard finds that to be "meaningless" and not his own pretend work? Emily's efforts were useful. They sustained the Gilmore household's social standing, which in turn keeps Richard employed. It's just really sad to see how deeply entrenched patriarchal values are and how they devalue women's work when women's work is what maintains societal status and familial wealth in such households.
A lot of you will come at me for saying this about Richard and all about how he worked his way up to being executive vice president, etc but I personally do not think he would have made it up there without Emily's support. Richard can't even pick up his own suit from the dry cleaners. Who would promote someone who doesn't even know what to wear to work? Didn't Emily say something about Richard not even knowing how to get a haircut without her support? So don't come at me with that logic. :)

So I’ll be launching a product in the next 4 weeks or so and my cofounder and I have a convenience that most don’t get. Actually we have two.

1 we’re married to our target market, which own their own practices and will be our first customers. This helped us beta test, find problems, and features they were more excited about than others. Essentially, about as close to product market fit as it gets with pretty little effort.

2 we don’t need venture capital or any type of fund raising, but have access to it.

So, statistically speaking we will likely fail anyway. However, hypothetically speaking, let’s say we are reasonably certain we can make it to a lucrative exit point at the very least.
Should we offer an opportunity for friends and family to invest at all? Technically only two of them could be considered institutional investors and, as I understand it, makes them eligible to be offered a SAFE.
The reason I’m asking is because I’d be pissed if my close friend or family didn’t give me a chance to invest a little in their possible success.
Probably a pipe dream since the stats are pretty high on a failure but I figured it couldn’t hurt to play this hypothetical game.
Also, by no means am I thinking I’ve come up with a unicorn or anything like that. But I personally saw how pissed upper management of a construction company got when they weren’t offered the chance to buy the company when the original owner sold. It was only doing like 3 million in revenue, and they’d be buying their full time jobs essentially, so you’d be surprised at how mad some people get when not given a simple invite to invest.

Hi guys and girls 🙂 I have a question for you, something I need help on.
I'm working on "What is resentment?" Its nature, etc. What do you think it is? I feel like this is something really valuable, because resentment is a literally poisonous thing, it is like black bile that coats the heart and makes it slowly turn black and putrefy. I know I have alot of it. I think everyone does. Just something that happens when you get older. You accumulate it, like you do gray hair and body fat and higher blood pressure. Life sucks?
What I figured out is that it may help to make a distinction between "resentment", "anger" and "bitterness." I was trying to turn resentment into a more basic word. But the best I came up with was "anger"... but that doesn't really fit. I guess you could say that resentment is inward anger. Anger which you've decided not to express openly or act upon, so it sort of stays inside. Bitterness seems to be sort a byproduct of resentment.
We talk alot about diabetes prevention and informing people of the risk behaviours that contribute to heart disease. What about bitterness? Bitterness kills too. And wrecks life experience. Isn't it more important? Surely psychological health is a mainstay along with physical health. Maybe someone has already solved it.
But what I figured out so far is that what is BEHIND resentment is pain. The emotional pain is what really needs to be addressed. Resentment is like the glazed surface of the apple of pain. Anyways... that doesn't really help. Psychological pain is ridiculously difficult to salve. May as well be impossible.
Another idea I had is to address resentment you could work on your beliefs. For instance, you may have the belief "This person MUST be this way", "I MUST achieve XYZ", "Life MUST be the way I envisage it to be", etc. You could be giving yourself hell that way. I think a big one is "XYZ is unfair!!!" Weird how you can be super resentful of Life itself -- not even resentful of any particular person, but super angry at the Big Guy himself, Life/the Universe/God. And that could be the biggest possible resentment you could ever have, despite it being totally abstract.
But that is kind of a mirage, in my opinion. True healing would involve operating at the foundational pain-level that I described. But still useful, for sure. Attacking beliefs is the famous approach of Cognitive Behaviour Therapy. I'm not a big fan of it.
Another interesting idea I have is, if you have resentment just ACT on it. You hate someone? Just tell them. Give them hell. Ok, this is already starting to be a bad idea. But you could do it in a constructive way. Address your problems directly instead of stewing on them for decades. I definitely am guilty of this. (I guess if, theoretically, there was a resentment that could not be acted out, was simply unactionable, then you could just shelve it or throw it down the garbage chute forever. That is, unless every resentment has a kernel of gold. I.e., is an expression of a fundamental pain. Pain shouldn't be ignored even if there's nothing you can do about it.)
(I could, and want, to give you an embarrassing personal example of resentment that means alot to me right now, but I won't. Sorry.)
What are you resentful for right now? Why are you resentful for that? Try to go deep.
Or is resentment something to accept, and just sort of look away from? If you had a kid, what would you teach them that would save them from a lifetime of resentment?

I graduated with a nursing degree in December and have yet to land a job. Out of the many jobs I’ve applied to, I’ve only had 1 interview. Everything I apply to gets sent to the hiring manager and then it’s crickets. I never would have thought that the job market would suck this bad even for the healthcare field. (for context i live in houston) You would think livng near the biggest medical center would have unlimited jobs right? wrong, i didn’t realize how competitive it is. I wish I knew this, I wish i had someone to tell me this while I was in nursing school and I would have pushed myself to get bedside experience. I had to pay for school so working at a resturanant was the easiest way for me to make money. I’m starting to realize it’s all about who you know and what connections you have, and i have none. I feel like a loser because most of my cohort already got and started their career already… it’s been 6 months since i graduated…

I've noticed there's lots of n00b questions here, and sometimes the token what's the job like? queries. When I got the job, I categorically didn't read anything on reddit. I did a seasonal at Target a while ago, and uh, I'm aware of how target does nothing but say negative things.
It's WalMart. Of course there will be bad things, but I figured most of us muddle through with not enough reason to set the place on fire this week.
I should caveat it's a one of those grocery stores, the WalMart Neighborhood Market, or whatever.
I applied for a Meat and Produce 4am shift, full-time.
In terms of application timetable... Applied on a Wednesday. Callback on a Friday. People Lead did the phone screening interview that day. In-person interview with GM on Sunday. Orientation/first day on Tuesday.
So, turnaround of about a week.
While not intrinsically required, charge your cell phone before coming in. You will be using it to clock in and out.
Your first few days will have the token boring computer training. Use the headphones. You'll retain 5% more than if you try to speedread it.
I applied for the 4am-1pm shift. Four of my shifts are this shift, and one random shift is a midshift of 9a-6p. I'm always zonked on that midshift. Because I'm insane, I go to bed around 3-5pm now. Why apply for first shift unless you're going to commit to sleeping? Sleep is important.
(Plus, gym is empty 12-2am, ha ha.)
My badge says Meat and Produce, but I haven't touched the meat section this month. In practice, my priority is definitely Produce. It also doesn't say dairy or frozen, but I sure do spend a bit of time there.
If you've done any stocking in the past, it's the typical freight-and-pick routine.
That's it. That's the job. Freight and pick.
Don't take the weightlifting requirements lightly. I moonlight as a gymrat, so I know how to move my body in space. I know how to lift to put the weight onto my glutes and spare my lower back. 40 lbs doesn't sound like much until you're doing it over and over and over again. If you're dumb enough to overload a dispose/claims bin, definitely over 60 lbs.
Use tables. Whether it's the trash can on wheels, or a cart, if you can place a heavy box on a table, do it. Work smarter, not harder.
I generally don't put heavy boxes overhead, but also. You will be lifting boxes overhead.
RPC stands for reusable product container; there's a lot of store lingo. Some I use, some I tune out. I digress.
VizPik is the program used for picking product out of the back. Target has a system where every item has a specific location in the back. WalMart, you can put it whereever in the back. While finding individual items is a crapshoot, scanning using a workphone is much preferable to hunting one elusive item.
Oh. Two months, and I still don't have a work phone. It is a pain in the ass, but I have to ask to borrow someone's workphone daily. I have half a dozen passwords memorized as a result. Don't expect a device anytime soon. You will be expected to pick regardless of whether you know anyone on shift.
Cull. I have food industry experience, so breaking the habit of "food cost" is a transition. Cull more than you think.
In terms of daily routine, let's pretend it's a good day.
Short version: Vizpik & pallet, 15, pallet, break, vizpik, 15, claims and cleanup.
Long version:
3:55 am: Clock in. Tour floor. Zone grapes and berries. Zone endcaps. Acquire TC and printer. Put up wetwall. Cull roma and slicer tomatos. Pee. Snag dry vizpik from partner; push. Put up dry pallet.
7 am: First 15 break. By this point, partner has usually finished the other half of vizpik and moved on to the RPC pallet. Grab salad pallet, and make sure salad vizpik is with it. Ferry boxbin to bailer as needed. Sweep and zone before leaving floor. Steal a work phone and pull dairy vizpik. (Partner does frozen.)
9:30am: Hour break
10:30 am: Push vizpik, push eaches in dairy, push hiland.
11:45 am: Second 15 break. Double-check claims, sweep/mop back room, double-check product backstocked. Aaaand misc tasks like airstacking bananas, watering plants, stocking flower, rotating milk, eggs, tea, and a bazillion other little things.
1:05pm: Put TC and printer batteries on chargers. Go home.
If you're lucky, a trainer or manager will help with one pallet. Which literally saves 1-2 manhours. Usually not. I've been told we're supposed to be done by 8:30 am. Which never happens unless a third person helps for an hour. Just one manhour, that's the difference maker.
To date, freight has always gotten done, even if I have to take my hour break before finishing. Vizpik is done every day. I know that sounds like a stupid "duh" to veterans, but as a task, it can feel very tacked-on your first few weeks. As long as the items are picked in the computer, management seems to not pester you. Just do the best you can getting out the product.
In terms of priority, always deal with produce's backstock and organization prior to pushing vizpik. Anyone can push product. Nobody else is going to fix organization in the produce walk-in.
So if you're haphazard backstocking, you are going to see that same problem the next day.
So yeah.
That's the job. I was already on a cut, but I've dropped another 20 lbs in the past two months. So uh. That's a factoid.
I work with one guy who has been with WalMart for 20 years. Knows his job and mildly tunes out managers. Quite autonomous. The other guy is a little younger and I'd swear he milks his 15 minute breaks to 20 minutes. But, freight gets put up. Each are different in terms of our work chemistry.
I can see this job going very badly, very quickly if I had less competent co-producers.
Invest in stocking gloves. If you don't, the cuts from cardboard and plastic will add up quickly.
It's a job. It's honest work. It passes the time. The moment-to-moment is low-stress mentally. I leave early afternoon with the sun shining bright. I'm introverted and I'm enjoying how I don't need to interact with people much. It's morning, so customers aren't douchenozzles yet. And, minimal coworker interaction, just the perfunctory.
Probably longer than most reddit user's attention span, but eh. Maybe one person will think "neat-o". Sure, it's WalMart, but everyone needs groceries. Whatever, man.

The specific issue that I’m here for is representative of the general problem. My son is five years old, a Capricorn (for those who understand the shorthand), and he is starting to understand reason but that doesn’t mean he is reasonable. We may have been overusing the stick and the carrot as incentives, but we’re always trying to implement better parenting techniques—it’s just that they never work out as easily as you think they might when you hear them.
Example: connect before you correct. Sure! Sounds amazing! But what about when I’m trying to talk to my kid but he’s looking off in a different direction and talking nonsense to himself? (It’s possible he has ADHD, from what I’ve been told it’s too early to diagnose him though).
Anyway. I have terrible teeth because my parents didn’t take enough time ensuring that I built good brushing habits, so I’ve been super diligent with that ritual. We found the Hum app and it worked wonders for a long time, but now he doesn’t want to do it. I get it, it’s the same game forever, it gets old. But it does such a good job training him to reach every part of his teeth and to brush for a solid length of time, I really want him to keep doing it as long as possible.
I tried incentivizing him with a party for him and four friends he’s been asking to invite over when he reaches the final level, and he’s really close. It would take him maybe two weeks. But half the time he still won’t do it. Sometimes talking to him about how fun it’s going to be helps. One time, telling him about why I push so hard for him to learn to brush helped. But none of the results are lasting and it’s still an uphill battle more than half of the time, and I’m tired.
Any recommendations for this age, this specific problem, the general issue, etc?
Thanks in advance! 🙏🏼

Shortly after *Final Fantasy VII* hit the gaming world in 1997, Cloud Strife’s howls of grief at the loss of his beloved companion Aerith Gainsborough were echoed by droves and droves of fans. These echoes gathered in swarms, reaching the developers in the form of petition signatures, each begging the makers of the game to allow Aerith’s resurrection. Though these prayers remained unanswered —until now—, there soon came more protests: this time, fans pleaded with the developers to consider making a remake of the original game. Both of these wishes were met with considerable derision, with large chunks of the fandom calling the requests delusional— which is why the Final Fantasy world had to prepare for another meteoric hit when the *Remake* project was finally announced in 2015. With Kitase, Nomura, Toriyama, Nojima, Uematsu and more of the original developers at the helm, along with longtime *FFVII* fan-turned-developer Hamaguchi, the *Remake* trilogy was met with great expectations. These were nevertheless surpassed, though one aspect of the trilogy’s first entry seemed to thoroughly puzzle some and enrage others. Far and wide, the resounding questions were “What are these Whisper things?”, “Why is Cloud having visions unrelated to Nibelheim and Zack?” and “Why and how in the hell did Zack survive?”
Friends, I believe the answer lies within this post. Welcome to my literary-analysis-based theory on the *Remake* trilogy’s most important and most secret plot point: Cloud’s hidden mission. I want to make this fun and suspenseful to read, so I will write my analyses in the same order and manner in which I encountered them while putting my theory together. You will be reading what initially sparked my curiosity, the path I took while researching for answers, the conclusions I made every step of the way, and only then will you read my theory, after which we’ll try and apply it to the *Remake* trilogy so far and see if it fits! I want you to experience the rollercoaster that I did when digging through SE content to bring you this post. Thank you so much for waiting for and anticipating this analysis, and I do hope you read every word to soak in every last bit of Clerith you can get. I also hope it’s really fun and touching for you (I cried at least once making this)! Let’s embark on our adventure through the compilation, other *FF* games and real-life events to find out what the *Remake* project is truly all about and anticipate the events of part 3.
N.B.: Please be aware that I have never seen this theory navigate online, so I have no idea if anyone has ever come up with a similar hypothesis. The big reveal I’m building toward might be something you’re already aware of or suspected. In that case, I hope this post doesn’t disappoint you if you’re one of the lovely people who requested it! At the very least, it will provide you with valuable literary and musical analysis, a ton of evidence you haven’t considered yet, and hopefully, entertainment too!
WARNING: Please be careful with the censored spoiler text, because I'll be referencing other *FF* games in this analysis and I don't want to ruin anything for you! Obviously, this analysis contains spoilers for the entirety of the *FFVII* compilation. Additionally, if you're not a fan of Clerith and you've stumbled upon this post, please stop here. I would hate it if something I worked on and posted made you angry, so please don't read this analysis. I have only good intentions and I just want everyone to enjoy the *FFVII* world as much as they can.
I. Groundwork: The Remake Timelines Theory
Before I take you on this ride, we must lay down the framework of the *Remake* Timelines Theory. In this section, we’ll be reviewing the general consensus of theorizers within the fandom on timeline/multiverse shenanigans, with some added specifications on my part. Please keep in mind that because the timeline mechanics are kept quite vague by the devs, there might be certain inaccuracies in my iteration of the timelines theory. Thankfully, these potential variances won’t have any effect on the legitimacy of the theory I’ll be presenting to you in this analysis.
I. a) Sephiroth’s Plan
The premise of the *Remake* trilogy is widely thought to be the result of post-OG Sephiroth attempting to succeed where he failed in OG. There are six key points we need to keep in mind to understand how this was possible.
I. a) i. Sephiroth in the Lifestream
Firstly, it’s important to remember that Sephiroth is dead and located in the Lifestream before OG even begins, and remains that way for almost all of OG's duration. He is only able to operate in the world of the living via his/Jenova's control over the living Sephiroth clones. In the OG timeline then, Sephiroth is sent to the Lifestream by Cloud twice: once before the game takes place on the night of the Nibelheim incident (pre-OG), and a second time during the final battle against Sephiroth (disk 3, chapter 3). During the long period between the Nibelheim incident and Sephiroth’s rebirth at the Northern Crater (disk 2, chapter 2), he exists in the Lifestream. After his ultimate defeat (post-OG), he returns there for good.
II. a) ii. Sephiroth Unintegrated
Secondly, because he is full of hatred and unyielding determination, Sephiroth’s spirit cannot become one with the planet. After both occasions where Cloud kills him in OG, Sephiroth retains his individual will and the memories of his lifetime, remaining a separate entity in the Lifestream. He says so himself in Nojima’s *Advent Children* prequel novel *On a Way to a Smile*:
“[Sephiroth] could sense the Lifestream trying to erode his spirit— the memories of his former experiences, thoughts and emotions. If he allowed himself be taken into the current, the being he once was would soon disseminate and disappear amongst the spirit energy cycling around the planet. [He] thought this unacceptable. The planet was to be his to rule, and to become a part of that system would be nothing short of defeat” (Lifestream Black 1).
Combined with Bugenhagen’s basic lesson on planetology (*FFVII* OG, disk 1, chapter 19), this excerpt provides interesting information on how the Lifestream normally works. Usually, when a life returns to the planet, its individuality (personality, will, consciousness, memories, etc.) is stripped away. The trappings of a soul’s former lifetime are progressively dissolved so that all that is left is the spirit itself, ready to integrate into the Lifestream. This way, soul energy can be “recycled” by the planet to animate new lifeforms in a sort of reincarnation process. The erasure of one’s memories in the Lifestream is necessary for the creation of a brand new life, poised to make its own memories: the slate must be wiped clean, so to speak. Sephiroth’s sheer hatred for and desire to dominate the planet is enough to keep him from undergoing this process.
It is also thought that Sephiroth cannot be integrated into the Lifestream because he was conceived with the use of Jenova cells in vitro. Given that so much of his consciousness and genetic makeup originate from an alien life force, it is impossible for him to become one with the planet.
Regardless of the reason, it is precisely this persisting individuality in death that allows Sephiroth to meddle in the world of the living during the post-OG events of *Advent Children*, as explained to us by post-OG Aerith in *On a Way to a Smile*:
“[Aerith] had sensed a different presence within the Lifestream cycling around the planet. It was the vehemence of a strong will, one that would never join with the planet. She knew this consciousness. It was [Sephiroth]. A merciless spirit hidden behind a beauteous wall. That spirit was now operating from within the Lifestream. [She] sensed that he was planning to exert his influence to the surface of the planet“ (Lifestream White 1).
I. a) iii. The Lifestream Beyond Time
Our third point is that the Lifestream has existed for as long as the planet, and has therefore touched every part of its history— including, of course, the events of OG. On that account, one could think of the Lifestream as atemporal. Considering this, it is possible for a spirit in the Lifestream to communicate with or even travel to the past, provided the necessary circumstances and/or abilities. For instance, the Aerith that appears in Cloud’s resolution scene in *Remake* (chapter 14) is commonly considered to be a post-OG Aerith, appearing to him from the future to try and dissuade him from falling for her. This time-defying event is made possible by the fact that post-OG Aerith’s spirit has access to the atemporal Lifestream because she's deceased. In my view, this explains why she dissolves into green light (Lifestream visual cue) at the end of [the resolution scene](https://youtu.be/ZPkqDB4guW8?si=JR1UTKl5cEFsFvfE&t=319) (5:19-5:45). This is not time travel per se, but it is a manner of communication unobstructed by the one-directionality of a linear timeline that only spirits can perform.
I. a) iv. Sephiroth Beyond Time
What we’ve covered so far amounts to our fourth point. Please familiarize yourself with the graph below before you continue reading. Refer back to the graph when you encounter **text in bold**.
The Remake Timelines Theory: FFVII OG Timeline
As we discussed in section “I. a) i.”, Sephiroth is dead and located in the Lifestream **for the duration of the green arrow and beyond point D**: in the context of the OG timeline, he can only ever be considered “alive” during the **period highlighted in purple**. In section “I. a) ii.”, we asserted that Sephiroth retained his individual will in the Lifestream, enabling him to exert his influence on the world of the living by manipulating his clones on the surface. In section “I. a) iii.”, we covered the atemporal nature of the Lifestream, which allows post-OG Aerith’s spirit to communicate with her past, living self thanks to her Cetra abilities. Now, I will explain to you how Sephiroth was able to do virtually the same thing, albeit his lack of Cetra blood.
To the characters of the story and a fully immersed first-time player of OG, the timeline above was not always an established series of events: when they first started playing *FFVII* OG, the player began at **point B**, with nothing existing beyond it. It is only as the player moved Cloud forward that the **black**, **arrowed timeline** was drawn, accumulating lived events (or **points**) in Cloud’s wake. The picture you see above is only available to Cloud and to the player with hindsight. All this to state the obvious: at **point B**, Cloud could not know what would occur, say, at **point C**.
During the **period highlighted in purple**, Sephiroth was “alive” again, accumulating new memories on the surface of the planet and adding them to his consciousness. When he entered the Lifestream for the second time at **point D**, he brought these memories with him. Simply put, after returning to the Lifestream at **point D**, Sephiroth remembers what happened during the **period highlighted in purple**. However, given that the Lifestream exists beyond time, upon Sephiroth’s consciousness’ return to the Lifestream at **point D**, his newly acquired memories were also made available to him at all points on the **green, double-arrowed line**— including **point A**, before the OG timeline even begins at **point B**. So while it is true that Cloud cannot know what will occur at **point C** if he is only at **point B**, Sephiroth indeed knows what will occur during the **period highlighted in purple** when he is only at **point A**. While a living, pre-OG Aerith would be able to receive post-OG Aerith’s spirit’s knowledge through the Lifestream thanks to her Cetra powers, Sephiroth has no need for this ability. The fact that he resides in the Lifestream for practically the entire ***FFVII*** **OG timeline** renders the limitations of time irrelevant: as far as the **timeline** is concerned, Sephiroth exists beyond time itself.
In summary, after **point D** was first encountered in OG, pre-OG Sephiroth (in the Lifestream) is made aware of his eventual defeat, and begins plotting an alternate path to victory. This time, with the benefit of hindsight, he will do things differently: we experience his "second” attempt at *FFVII* as the *Remake* trilogy.
I. a) v. Sephiroth Against Fate
Of course, the Whispers stand squarely in Sephiroth’s way. This leads us to our fifth point, which *Remake Ultimania* describes better than I ever could:
“According to Red XIII, who gained knowledge through his contact with Aerith, ‘The Whispers are drawn to those who attempt to alter destiny’s course and ensure they do not’ […]. It would appear that what the Whispers deem to be ‘fate’ is the original story of Final Fantasy VII” (section 08 “Secrets”, “Newly Arisen Mysteries”, “What Is the Goal of the Elusive Whispers?”, page 733).
OG’s plot line is the fated timeline, and the Whispers are tasked with its preservation. They prevent alternative paths from even beginning to branch out from the OG timeline, which poses a problem for Sephiroth: he cannot win *FFVII* if his destiny is to lose it.
I. a) vi. Sephiroth and the Multiverse
Consequently, our sixth point is that Sephiroth must dismantle the mechanisms of fate before he can even try to accomplish his dreams of godhood.
As Sephiroth explains in chapter 14 of *Rebirth*, “the planet encompasses \[an ever unfolding\] multitude of worlds”, and these“\[new worlds are born\] when the boundaries of fate are breached.” Since the Whispers uphold the “boundaries of fate”, a world in which Sephiroth’s evil plans succeed can only emerge after the Whispers have been defeated. Otherwise, destiny will continue to protect the OG plot line by preventing any significant deviations. Consequently, before the party vanquishes fate, the *Remake* timeline and the OG timeline are one and the same: before chapter 18, *Remake* Barret is OG Barret, *Remake* Tifa is OG Tifa, *Remake* Hojo is OG Hojo, etc. After the defeat of Destiny, the OG timeline is no longer protected by fate: there are now an infinite number of timelines or worlds, including those we see glimpses of in *Rebirth*: *Remake* Barret is no longer necessarily OG Barret, *Remake* Tifa is no longer necessarily OG Tifa, *Remake* Hojo is no longer necessarily OG Hojo, etc. Perhaps this is why Aerith gives the party the following warning at destiny’s crossroads in *Remake*:
“[This] is the wall of destiny. If we go through it… if we go beyond it… then all of us will change, too” (FFVII Remake Material Ultimania Plus, VA script notes, “Destiny’s Crossroads”).
I. a) vii. Sephiroth’s Plan
Now that these six points have been elucidated, we can compose a solid hypothesis on how Sephiroth plots to win *FFVII*.
After gaining knowledge of his eventual demise (disk 3, chapter 3), pre-OG Sephiroth began thinking of what he must do in *Remake* from the Lifestream. First, Sephiroth must antagonize the Whispers in the initial stages of the OG timeline. He accomplishes this by commanding his clones to commit acts that drastically violate the fated timeline, engendering plot-line deviations that the Whispers must course-correct. The most extreme example transpires in *Remake*’s chapter 17 when the Sephiroth clone in President Shinra’s office kills Barret, forcing the Whispers to restore the fated plot line by coming forth and reviving him. The Whispers react to Sephiroth’s prodding by rushing in to protect fate, their efforts culminating in the protective wall of destiny that surrounds Midgar in chapter 18.
Secondly, after he’s created an opportunity for a battle against the Whispers, Sephiroth must convince the party to seize it and beat fate for him. After all, a mere Sephiroth clone is probably no match for Destiny. This second step is accomplished in *Remake*’s chapter 18 when Sephiroth successfully tempts Cloud to breach the boundaries of fate. Now that destiny is no longer a limitation, worlds deviating from the OG timeline can finally emerge; Sephiroth has a chance at victory.
The steps Sephiroth plans to take going forward are unknowable at this stage, but we do get more hints in *Rebirth*’s chapter 13. At the Temple of the Ancients, Sephiroth reveals a part of his plot:
“Sephiroth: My fragmented mother, these errant worlds... All shall be one again.
Aerith: The ‘Reunion’…!”
It seems Sephiroth eventually plans to merge the worlds created by destiny’s defeat in *Remake*’s chapter 18. My guess is he hopes to achieve godhood in part 3 and consolidate all diverting worlds into a single timeline protected by destiny once more— only this time, his victory will replace the ending of OG as the destined outcome. If he succeeds, Sephiroth’s Black Whispers will likely replace the planet’s Whispers as the arbiters of his desired fate.
I. b) Aerith’s Intervention
But Aerith can’t let this slide unchallenged!
We know that before chapter 18 of *Remake*, while the OG plot-line is still protected by fate, Aerith has knowledge of its future. This is insinuated by certain slips of the tongue: for instance, when Aerith reveals she knows Cloud is a mercenary upon meeting him for the second time in chapter 8, just like she knows Tifa will ask her to retrieve Marlene at Seventh Heaven in chapter 12. In the run-up to *Remake*, post-OG Aerith's spirit likely sensed Sephiroth planning his second try at *FFVII* in the Lifestream. She’s been able to anticipate Sephiroth’s plotting in the Lifestream before, namely in the context of *Advent Children*:
“[Aerith] had sensed a different presence within the Lifestream cycling around the planet […]. It was [Sephiroth] […]. That spirit was now operating from within the Lifestream. [She] sensed that he was planning to exert his influence [on] the surface of the planet” (On a Way to a Smile, Lifestream White 1).
If you’re wondering how Aerith was able to maintain her individuality in the Lifestream like Sephiroth, On a Way to a Smile provides the following explanation:
“[Aerith] was an Ancient, which explained how she was able to maintain her individuality even within the Lifestream. If she so wished she could become part of the planet at any time, but [she] thought it too early for that just yet” (Lifestream White 1).
It is thought that, as a countermeasure to Sephiroth's scheming, post-OG Aerith’s spirit used the atemporal nature of the Lifestream to inform her past, living self (pre-OG Aerith) of this new threat to the planet. Because the Cetra can commune with spirits, pre-OG Aerith would have been able to receive post-OG Aerith’s message from the Lifestream without a problem. Essentially, pre-OG Aerith received post-OG Aerith’s memories of the fated OG timeline. As a consequence, pre-OG Aerith embarks on the OG timeline with knowledge of the fated future that demands she give her life: the player experiences this version of her in *Remake*.
Be that as it may, it’s unclear how much *Remake* Aerith is aware of. You would think she’d be completely opposed to defeating, destiny since it protects the planet, but Aerith shows ambivalence toward the idea instead. Had she gotten a clear message from her future self that she must keep fate intact, she would not have allowed the party to enter the battle against fate in chapter 18. She doesn’t seem to know what the Whispers are the first time she encounters them either. Regardless, what’s important is that the Aerith seen in *Remake* is the result of pre-OG Aerith receiving knowledge from post-OG Aerith via the Lifestream.
I. c) Ambiguity: Memory Transfer or Time-Travel?
There remains an ambiguity pertaining to the Aerith we see in *Remake* and the question of time travel. What I’ve described to you in section “I. b)” is post-OG Aerith's spirit transferring her memories to her past self through the Lifestream. However, it’s possible that post-OG Aerith’s consciousness used the atemporal nature of the Lifestream to inhabit her living OG body instead, effectively time-traveling. There is no evidence to outright refute either explanation, since the gaps in Aerith’s memories of the OG plot-line in *Remake* can be explained in both cases. For instance, in a memory transfer scenario, it’s possible that post-OG Aerith only communicated the most essential information to pre-OG Aerith. On the other hand, in a time-travel scenario, one could interpret the following quotes as proof that the Whispers are progressively erasing Aerith’s memories of OG as *Remake* advances:
“Aerith: Every time the Whispers touch me, a piece of me falls away” (FFVII Remake Material Ultimania Plus, VA script notes, “Aerith Speaks”)
“At any rate, Aerith is perplexed at how, like a flower being scattered, something inside is being taken away by the Whispers and lost to her” (Toriyama in FFVII Remake Material Ultimania Plus, VA script notes, “Aerith Speaks”, “Scenario Staff Q&A - Answered by Motomu Toriyama”).
This ambiguity is completely irrelevant to Sephiroth’s situation in *Remake*, as we established in section “I. a) iv.”.
The specifics don’t matter nearly as much as I’m impressing upon you by explaining all these little alternatives. Simply keep in mind that: regardless of why, the Sephiroth and Aerith we see in *Remake* know the events of the OG game because they have acquired this knowledge from the future, and the events of *Remake* occur squarely within the OG timeline until the Whispers are defeated in chapter 18.
So there! That’s my iteration of the *Remake* Timelines Theory! I hope I’ve made it clear in your mind, or at least clearer. Now that we’ve established the widely theorized premise of the *Remake* trilogy, we can get into our theory on its hidden premise.
II. My Initial Curiosity
My theory first burgeoned upon going through *Remake* for the second time. I noticed something strange going on with Cloud, something that could not be explained by the *Remake* Timelines Theory. Key moments in *Remake* Cloud’s experience of the OG timeline (aka, everything before chapter 18) stuck out to me as strange and mysterious, and certain inexplicable audiovisual cues struck me as hugely significant. It was upon watching the tear fall from Cloud’s eye during my second go at chapter 8 that I knew I had to look into this.
At the very end of *Remake*’s chapter 8, Cloud watches Aerith walk away from him, humming happily into the night air as she sets off to lead the way to Sector 7. According to the VA script notes, “his heart skips a beat” and watching her walk away provokes a sudden “anxiety” within him. Triggered by the familiarity of the sight, a strange sensation overcomes Cloud:
“[There’s a] close-up shot of Cloud’s fingertips (they’re tingling). He presses them to his temples (his eyes are burning). A trickle of tears quickly rolls down from the eye hidden behind his hand” (FFVII Remake Material Ultimania Plus, VA script notes, “A Midnight Ambush”).
If you’re clever, you’ll recognize these lines as a reference to the speech Cloud makes in OG following Aerith’s death at the City of the Ancients (“My fingers are tingling. My mouth is dry. My eyes are burning!”) (disk 1, chapter 28). In this small moment in chapter 8 of *Remake*, Cloud experiences a flash of the profound grief he is destined to feel upon Aerith’s fated death.
Many players immediately recognized the composition of this scene: the blue-greenish air, the straight path Aerith heads down, the sight of her walking away itself… this moment closely resembles Cloud’s Sleeping Forest dream of Aerith in OG, wherein Cloud and Aerith’s very last words are exchanged (disk 1, chapter 25). Toriyama, codirector of the *Remake* project, comments on this scene thusly:
“It’s possible these similarities […] cause a memory of the future to be called forth in Cloud” (FFVII Remake Material Ultimania Plus, VA script notes, “A Midnight Ambush”).
The language used by Toriyama here is strange in both the English translation and the Japanese original: the term “memory of the future” makes no sense. One cannot remember things they haven’t already experienced, so why did Toriyama use the word “memory” to describe a "future" event? Couldn’t he have simply said that *Remake* Cloud experiences “visions of the future” rather than “\[memories\]”?
Cloud experiences a few moments like these throughout the game. These pseudo-premonitions are just as markedly exclusive to *Remake* as the Whispers are. I did not want to dismiss them as a foreshadowing device the devs included just to elicit emotional reactions from OG players; I felt they were more important. And thus began my digging! My mission was initially to figure out what these “\[memories of the future\]” (MOTFs) could signify… I had no clue it would turn into what I’m writing right now.
II. a) Each MOTF and Its Context
I began by finding every one of Cloud’s MOTFs so I could better understand them.
MOTF 1 occurs in chapter 2 on Sector 8’s Loveless Street, when Cloud sees Aerith struggling against the Whispers. The VA script notes reveal that even though this is only his first time seeing her, Cloud recognizes Aerith’s face:
“Recognizing Aerith’s face causes Cloud to experience [a hallucination]. Sephiroth is suddenly standing between him and Aerith” (FFVII Remake Material Ultimania Plus, VA script notes, “Encountering Aerith”).
Sephiroth then taunts Cloud with words that, according to the script notes, “\[live\] inside of Cloud's heart”*:* “You can’t protect anyone. Not even yourself”. Cloud should not recognize Aerith’s face at this point in the OG timeline, nor should he associate it with not being able to protect people.
MOTF 2 occurs in chapter 3, at the plaza in front of the Sector 7 slums support pillar. Cloud experiences a MOTF of the plate falling, which is fated to occur at a much later point in chapter 12. The Whispers float near him, “watching Cloud alertly as he sees a vision of the future” (*FFVII Remake Ultimania*, section 08 “Secrets”, “Newly Arisen Mysteries”, “What Is the Goal of the Elusive Whispers?”, page 733).
MOTF 3 occurs in Aerith’s church at the start of chapter 8, when Aerith mentions that her mother’s materia is “not good for anything at all”. Triggered by the mention and sight of the White Materia, Cloud’s fourth MOTF takes the form of a vision: he sees quick flashes of the materia falling into the lake of the Forgotten Capital and Aerith holding her hands together in prayer. These are evidently visions of her death in OG (disk 1, chapter 28).
MOTF 4 is the one we first discussed, occurring at the very end of chapter 8 as Cloud watches Aerith walk away from him to lead the way toward Sector 7.
MOTF 5 occurs in chapter 13 shortly after the Sector 7 plate has fallen on the slums. Cloud tells Barret that Marlene is safe at Aerith’s house, and they begin heading there. As Cloud thinks about Aerith, the VA script notes describe the very next moment as follows:
“Cloud: Tifa, you know anything about the Ancients?
Tifa: I’ve heard of them before, but…
Barret walks on ahead, showing little interest in the topic.
Barret: Read a book on planetology and they’re sure to come up. They’re a tribe that cultivated the planet a real long time ago. Used to talk to it. That sort of stuff.
Cloud: That must be why the Turks were after her.
[Psychic] interference starts up.
[Cloud has a] flashback of Sephiroth from five years ago, after learning of his ancestry at Shinra Manor […].
Sephiroth [(in flashback, voice tinged with madness)]: Within my veins flows the blood of the Ancients. I am the rightful heir to this planet!
The flashback ends and Cloud looks lost in thought. The interference starts up once more. Cloud makes agonized sounds. When he opens his eyes, Sephiroth is actually standing before him.
Sephiroth: You failed again— failed to protect [her]*.
Cloud is startled. He shrinks back. Tifa watches what’s happening. The other two can’t see Sephiroth. All they see is Cloud acting frightened.
Sephiroth: But loss will make you strong. […] Isn’t that what you want?
With that, Sephiroth departs.”
*Sephiroth does not use a gendered pronoun here, because the grammatical structure of the original Japanese sentence doesn’t necessitate it. I've seen some debate as to whether the proper translation is “her” (Aerith, who’s just been kidnapped), or “them” (Jessie, Biggs or Wedge, who have seemingly just died). I believe Sephiroth was referring to Aerith for a few reasons. First, Cloud’s hallucinations of Sephiroth always appear as a response to whatever he is perceiving or thinking about at the moment. At this point in the scene, Cloud has been thinking and talking about Aerith for some time, and not about Jessie, Biggs or Wedge. The Sephiroth hallucination must therefore be referring to “her” rather than to “them”. Secondly, Cloud was never tasked with “[protecting]” Avalanche, but he was in fact tasked with “[protecting]” Aerith as her bodyguard back in chapter 8: it makes far more sense for Sephiroth to be referring to Aerith when he speaks about someone Cloud “failed to protect”. Finally, FFVII Remake Ultimania describes this piece of dialogue as “[Sephiroth aiming] these profound words at Cloud, who not only failed to prevent the tragedy in the Sector 7 slums but allowed Aerith to be abducted” (Sephiroth’s profile in section 01 “Character & World”, “Impressive Words”, page 29): the specific mention of Aerith here seals my decision to translate the line with the pronoun “her”.
Contrary to Sephiroth’s words, this is the first time in *Remake* that Cloud “\[fails\] to protect \[Aerith\]”, and he hasn’t “\[lost\]” her either— not yet, at least. This fifth MOTF must then be similar to MOTF 1, in that Sephiroth is referring to Cloud’s guilt surrounding Aerith’s death in OG.
MOTF 6 occurs in chapter 17, in Aerith and Ifalna’s old room at Shinra HQ. The Whispers swarm Aerith as she tells the party earnestly that she wants to do everything in her power to help her friends and the planet: according to the script notes, it is at this very moment that, “for some reason, Cloud feels his chest constrict tightly” (*FFVII Remake Material Ultimania Plus*, VA script notes, “Aerith Speaks”). In the corresponding cutscene, this unpleasant physiological reaction to Aerith’s words makes Cloud glance down at his chest with a confounded frown. This physical response to her speech about wanting to fulfill her duty to the planet implies that Cloud somehow knows deep down that saving the world will cost Aerith her life.
At this point, I noticed that five out of the six MOTFs Cloud experiences in *Remake* are triggered by and/or revolve around Aerith specifically, the one exception being a MOTF of the Sector 7 plate fall. One could actually argue that this MOTF revolves around Aerith too, considering the plate fall marks the first time Aerith is taken away from Cloud since reuniting with her in the Sector 5 slums church. This is more than plausible, as MOTF 5 proves that in the wake of the Sector 7 plate fall, Cloud’s main concern is Aerith (see section “II. a)”). How fitting is it, then, that the merc of few words’ longest uninterrupted piece of dialogue in all of *Remake* is:
“We found an underground Shinra lab where they've done human testing. This wasn't the first time and it won't be the last. I know these people, and I know they're never gonna let Aerith go. She's the last living Ancient on the planet. Think about what that means to Shinra's scientists. Especially to that son of a bitch Hojo. We're all just numbers and meat to him—“ (Remake, chapter 13).
Cloud would’ve gone on too, had Elmyra and Tifa not stopped him.
At this point in my research, my questions were only stacking up. What are these MOTFs? Why is Cloud the only one experiencing them? Why do all of them implicate Aerith? What did the devs hope to accomplish with their inclusion in the game? What do they mean for *Remake*’s story? But most importantly:
II. b) What Does Cloud Know?
The first assertion we have to make is simple, yet essential: the only reason Cloud would experience MOTFs is that whatever’s triggered them is significant to him in one way or another. Some part of him must recognize his triggers for them to be triggers at all. It’s clear he doesn’t consciously understand the meaning of his MOTF triggers, just like his Jenova triggers: for example, Cloud doesn’t know why Zack’s name causes him to experience psychic interference, but it sure does. We as players know Cloud’s MOTFs are hinting at Aerith’s fated death because of our awareness of OG, but as a character navigating the OG timeline, *Remake* Cloud shouldn't even be unconsciously aware of Aerith’s eventual death in the slightest! Whatever the nature of the MOTFs, it’s essential to understand that if Cloud “\[recognizes\]” Aerith’s face the first time he sees her, it must mean some part of him knows Aerith’s face in the first place. If this recognition triggers a hallucination of Sephiroth telling Cloud he “can’t protect anyone”, it must mean some part of him knows he was once unable to protect Aerith. The same goes for every other MOTF: subconsciously, *Remake* Cloud somehow has memories of the OG timeline. Most interestingly, it looks like he either only has OG memories related to Aerith, or like his OG memories of Aerith are simply the only ones prominent enough to trigger his MOTFs. Why and how does *Remake* Cloud have memories of OG, and why are they so focused on Aerith in particular? What does he know?
When examining a situation with no explanation, it’s wise to examine similar situations that have already been explained. Maybe the mystery of *Remake* Cloud’s MOTFs will become more approachable if we consider the cases of the only other *Remake* characters who seem to know the future: Aerith and Sephiroth. *Remake* Sephiroth knows the future of the OG timeline because his consciousness exists beyond time in the Lifestream, while *Remake* Aerith likely obtained her knowledge of the future from post-OG Aerith’s spirit via the Lifestream. But what about Cloud? Where does his weaker, fragmented knowledge come from?

We have been together for almost 5 years and have a beautiful child together. We have both had abusive relationships in the past and found that it had brought us closer together. We met at work and instantly hit it off and within a year of knowing each other we were living together and started a family. I by no means was ever a patient man nor was I an optimistic. As our time grew I saw that I became more of the “looking at the bright side “ of things person and she tended to complain a lot. I always gave the space for her to vent but when it was my turn to vent I was hit with “I complain too much”. And I immediately shut down. That was one time and it just stuck with me, she apologized and we moved on but I never felt like I had safe space to vent or complain. Meanwhile I still provide her the platform to do all that-vent complain and decompress to me. The thing is it takes its toll on me. I work customer service in two jobs and I am a manager overseeing a small team in my typical 9-5. Stress isn’t even a question for me anymore, I run on stress and caffeine 24/7. On top of trying to be a present dad and good husband I just feel depleted. We downgraded to a room to save up to buy a house and she is constantly worried that we may never get there. I always try to reassure her that we are sacrificing right now but we have a plan. Most of the times she seems my perspective and I mention all the things we have going for us- health, good jobs, extra activities we are able to do, having our family. Well she was hit with some tooth problems that caused her enormous pain a couple weeks ago. And of course I took care of her at the same time as taken care of the little one on top of working 70+ plus hours a week. She gets better after 10 days and some complications. A few days later she gets sick and again here I come taking care of everything and everyone. Now I’m fighting off a cold but can’t take time off of work so I’m battling that and now that I’m feeling functional she hits me with this “all these sacrifices are for nothing” I try to make her feel better and she shuts me down saying she hates”uncertainty and ifs “. I shut down and just go to bed because I do not want to snap at her and cause a fight. I can’t make someone look forward to something if they do not want to and it’s exhausting trying to pick her up while still keeping my mental sanity sane. I have hit rock bottom so many times and felt absolutely defeated but I was able to pick myself up and look forward to things. The things that motivated me and kept me going were the “ifs” and the “hopes” how can I share my experiences with her and get her to see things in a more optimistic light?

I recently received an admission offer for the MS in Computer Science program at California State University, Long Beach (CSULB). While I'm excited about the opportunity, I'm facing some concerns and uncertainties, particularly given the current job market and the significant investment required for this degree.
A bit about my background: I am currently working as a Software Development Engineer in India. I've been with the company for three years, growing from an intern to SDE 2. Although my job is well-paying, I'm looking for new experiences. Pursuing a master's degree abroad has been a dream of mine, but given the current circumstances, I'm unsure if it's the right time.

Questions About the Program and Academics

1. Program Quality
   • How would you rate the quality of the MS in Computer Science program at CSULB?
   • What are the strengths and weaknesses of the program?
2. Faculty and Resources
   • Can you tell me about the faculty and their expertise?
   • Are there sufficient resources like labs, libraries, and research facilities?
3. Curriculum and Specializations
   • How flexible is the curriculum? Are there opportunities to specialize in areas of interest?
   • How up-to-date and industry-relevant is the coursework?
4. Class Size and Interaction
   • What is the average class size for graduate courses?
   • How accessible are professors and how often can you interact with them?

Questions About Career Opportunities and Networking

1. Internships and Job Placement
   • How supportive is the university in terms of helping students secure internships and jobs?
   • What is the success rate of graduates in finding employment in their field?
2. Alumni Network
   • How strong and active is the alumni network?
   • Are there opportunities to connect with alumni for mentorship and job opportunities?
3. Career Services
   • How effective are the career services offered by the university?
   • What kind of support is provided for job search, resume building, and interview preparation?

Questions About Campus Life and Support

1. Student Life and Community
   • What is the campus culture like?
   • Are there clubs, organizations, or activities for graduate students?
2. Support Services
   • What kind of support services are available for international students, such as academic advising, mental health support, and career counseling?
3. Housing and Living Conditions
   • What are the housing options like for graduate students?
   • How affordable is living in Long Beach, and what is the cost of living like?

Questions About Financial Considerations

1. Tuition and Funding
   • Are there any scholarships, assistantships, or other forms of financial aid available for graduate students?
   • How manageable is the cost of tuition and living expenses with part-time work or internships?
2. Return on Investment
   • Given the current job market, do you feel the investment in this degree has paid off for you and your peers?
   • How long did it take for you and your peers to repay any student loans?

Questions About Future Prospects

1. Market Situation and Future Outlook
   • How has the current job market affected recent graduates from the program?
   • What are the prospects for international students in terms of securing jobs and work visas?
2. Personal and Professional Growth
   • How has the program contributed to your personal and professional growth?
   • Would you recommend this program to someone in my position, and why or why not?

Personalized Context Questions

1. Transition from India to the USA
   • How was your transition from India to the USA in terms of academics, culture, and lifestyle?
   • What challenges did you face, and how did you overcome them?
2. Balancing Work and Studies
   • Is it feasible to work part-time while studying to help with expenses?
   • How demanding is the program in terms of time and effort?

Any insights, experiences, or advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you!
These are a lot of questions but if someone can spare time to get back with suggestions and answers I would greatly appreciate it.
PS: I had also applied to selective top colleges but couldn't make it in any one of them. UCs, Umass, UIUC, Purdue.
Thanks!

I spent from nov of 06 till june 0f 2018 with a government agency just hit a wall and needed to take a break. spent the better part of 3.5 years floating from one shitty job to the next mostly retail or quick jobs couldn't really find something I wanted to do (granted I quit a lot of those jobs after a cup of coffee ) Could of been burn out, could of been being tired of getting hired for a job that needed 20 people to run and it was me the new guy and 4 other people, honestly probably it was my BS meter was on full and I just don't want to put up with that amount of BS so I would leave.
Now after 3.5 years I decided to go back to the agency job and found out that nothing changed and honestly gave it a good 2 years and decided that I just had enough. Now that I am looking for serious work again I find companies are just not interested in me. Today I got done with a psych exam for a state agency everything seemed ok till we got to the part where I needed to go through my work history.
The person grilled me like i was some sort of ex con that had a wrap sheet a mile long so why did you quit so and so. I answered truthfully as I could but got the feeling that I am now out of the running for this current job offering. The thing that pisses me off the most is that I was honest with the interviewers and they seemed not bothered with my work history but now that this Psych exam took place . I just don't know yes I did it to myself but does it really matter that someone quit some give me jobs in the grand scheme of things? Especially when at any given time a job can let you go for any number of reasons and working in a state that allows you and the company to part ways for any reason I just don't get it.

I've been single for several years now and i still feel like a noob at dating hahah. Can't we just skip to the late night cuddles, the bullying as an act of love? Playing videogames together, sharing weird memes and visiting new places?
Anyway, my name is Jordy, i'm 27 years old, 1.79m tall with a dad bod, from Belgium. I've been working as a technician for a telecommunications company for the past 6 years. My career is going well and i enjoy my job however, my dream would be to open up my own nerd/geek café where people can play videogames, boardgames/D&D, read comics, manga, have LAN parties, host movie nights? Etc. But as a smart person once said:"In this economy?!".
Most of my hobbies include the things mentioned above hahah, you can also add anime, playing guitar and hikes on to the list though.
I'm a big time music addict. I love pop, rock, punk, edm and will listen to most things. My favorite artists are currently Lewis Capaldi and Jake Scott. You will hear me sing most of the day, every day - i'm sorry in advance (not).
Personality wise i'm an introvert. During my job hours i'm mostly outside and talking to strangers but it does empty my social battery. A party is the last place i wanna be basically hahah, it's not my cup of tea. I do however enjoy going to museums, concerts, cinemas, bowling alleys, etc. I'm also not a very serious person, i love dark humor and enjoy making people laugh. I consider myself to be a hopeless romantic who's love languages are words of affirmation and physical touch. I wanna emphasise that i'm looking for a serious long term relationship but once we are comfortable with eachother, you will notice i have a pretty high libido. I know that's not everyone's cup of tea and that's ok.
I'm hoping to find someone with similar interests and who's looking for the same thing. Hopefully if we hit it off, we can close the distance! I'm not looking for just an online thing. When you message me, please introduce yourself. Ohh, and here's me: https://imgur.com/a/a1btyJX

Hi! I’m about to finish my EMT schooling and go for my license next week. I really enjoyed my clinicals riding out with the local 911 ambulance company, and I didn’t think before doing clinicals that I’d love it as much as I did. Originally this was a stepping stone to nursing school, but I think I want to potentially start a career here and maybe go for medic.
The clincals were regular 12h shifts, and my body held up pretty well. Although it was a single day shift a week apart from each other (two total). Being able to move around and sit/stand whenever I want was pretty good on my back.
I wanted to see if theres anyone else in this sub who also does EMS work and how you feel with it? Is full time physically difficult due to AS? I would only do day shifts because I know ruining my sleep schedule will cause really bad flares.
I’m 20yo this year, and pretty well managed on xeljanz and cymbalta. I do know that this job is also emotionally demanding and that could play a part into flares as well, at least for me. As always, this disease sucks and I want to be aware of the reality going into it because we aren’t like everyone else, I’m especially not like other 20 year olds. So any insight- good or bad- would be appreciated!
Thank you :)

After much consideration, and planning, I am going to return to video production. When I began making videos on a weekly or monthly basis, I had plenty of free time due to the big coof. This was me learning things like scheduling, editing, how to make the microphone work, and I learned plenty through trial and error. There is a dramatic difference between my first videos and my recent ones because of this learning experience. But as I learned about how to make videos, I learned that I was wasting my time with them.
A LOT of time.
Whatever you’re thinking is a time waste for a video is not really it, unless you’ve been there and done that. During that time, I ruined my sleep schedule and would even pass up on small money opportunities, all because I thought my Youtube videos would send me into stardom. Plant a seed, watch it grow, that sort of thing. But, looking at my numbers, it was the exact opposite. Each video coming out, utilizing the keywords and subject matter as a reason to click, was essentially a false sense of activity.
Working on other people’s channels created even more false cases of activity, which created a false sense of justifying why I’m putting labor into something.
Like most artists, I was gaslighting myself into thinking that the time spent into a project was going to translate into a future income from something else. We always see these videos where it seems zero effort was put into it and it goes viral, not realizing that years of failing and group efforts were required to reach those results. And even then, a youtube video existing doesn’t cause a person to instantly gain money from that existence. I have a friend who made a viral video and he didn’t get anything from millions of views, because there was nothing to monetize. I have another friend who made a viral video, trying to recreate the magic, and nothing came of it after a year or two of trying.
Not only is it hard to receive results, but the amount of time it takes to attempt is ridiculous. I didn’t time myself, but if I knew how many hours were sunk into each video, I would probably pull out my balls in anger. The process of each video was a mess of:

1. Writing down a script (takes more than an hour to write an hour of script)
2. Recording the audio (takes more than an hour to record an hour)
3. Editing the audio (takes about double the time of whatever its recorded)
4. Making the thumbnail
5. Making the avatar
6. Collecting images
7. Collecting video clips
8. Making images and clips
9. Editing through clips that are too long
10. Adding sound effects
11. Finding and adding music
12. Waiting for it to render (usually this is where I go to do other things)
13. Rendering it AGAIN through handbrake so it’s a smaller file (quicker than waiting for uploading a multi GB file)
14. Uploading it across youtube, bitchute, and rumble

I don’t want to make this sound like I’m complaining, but this is the bare minimum effort that goes into a youtube video, not mentioning the details of how things are edited or the issues with troubleshooting. A lot of what ate up my time was realizing when things aren’t working way too late, such as how GIFs don’t register well and they slow down a larger project. Or better yet, how a large project slows down to a crawl and you have to render multiple segments separately in order to keep things running smoothly. My files, as organized as I tried to keep them, were unorganized as hell because I would set them up during production instead of before production. Then by the end of it, there would be something wrong that I would have to edit, remove, I forgot something, something vanished between saves, or even corrupted files because I moved something and didn’t realize it was part of something else.
Video editing is utter hell in the beginning, but it gets better after you look after your process and actually organize everything well.
I spent a night the other week changing up all of my files. I put them on my desktop, where I can easily access them, and away from my downloads. This is important because your downloads can be bogged down with anything you download, and eventually it becomes a massive mess of pictures, videos, game patches, or whatever else you’re downloading; all getting in the way of your actual project. You want your files to be files within files, and each file is marked clearly for its purpose and its direction. I had a million songs splayed out in different areas and couldn’t remember where they were, of course when I wanted them, all because they would get trapped in piles of other things I downloaded for later.
My file finding time is now only limited by the slowness of my computer acquiring it.
Audio began as a mess of me going through each line to make sure there was no extra noise, and having to fix anything that was too quiet or not full enough. Turns out I was making my audio way too maximized and wasting a lot of time on stuff that people wouldn’t even recognize as an issue. Now my audio mixing is done through OBS, already set up as a particular compression and volume that will stay in the acceptable range, with noise removal already set up.
My audio recording/editing time is closer to how long it takes to speak.
Developing each chapter card, clipping them together, having to find the font, typing everything out. These, along with getting sound effects working, took up too much time. What I did is make a plan to prepare all of these first, before anything else is added to the video, so that I know how many chapters there are. They don’t take that long to render, because of how short they are, and it takes way less time to do that than to shift gears at the end of the production day. Shifting gears every couple of minutes, that was wasting too much time, which is now changed to doing one specific task each session.
My “switching” time is removed, thus saving time.
Music was added in the beginning, as one of the first things. This was wrong to do, because of how many times I would want a clip where the music continues through it, only to realize that this continuation forced me to keep a massive background of editing history, which slows everything down through production. Adding music as the last bit, and after rendering, will save me minutes for every time I boot up the video editor, which saves hours over time when I’m going to have to go back and forth on video editing. My lifestyle only gives me an hour or two at a time to sit in front of the computer, and so editing will require less wait time for the process to warm up.
My rendering time will increase(as I go to do other things), but my waiting time will decrease.
Through my new process, I am also considering a different view of each video type. Recently, I saw a video about how kindle books are categorized between low, mid, and high content; related to how much effort it takes to make each one. My previous attempts were to, essentially, make high effort content as consistently as possible, which was going to be draining when these were events that came and went. Current news like Lindsay Ellis being stupid or DSP looking like a fool on Sidescrollers are incredibly time sensitive, which is why so many people stream these “news reports” instead of making high effort videos about them. And even if it was a long term type of video, we have to question if it REQUIRES that much effort to begin with.
My plans for the future are to measure how long I take with each session, what I get done, track down percentages, and measure what the longest steps are. Figuring out what’s causing a hold-up is the best way to prevent hold-ups, in the same way city builders (should) keep track of what’s causing traffic jams. Too many traffic jams? Get rid of cars or open more lanes. Keeping track of things is going to take minutes to save hours, which is something I should have practiced more on doing through my practicing year.
Videos are done with marketing in mind, because I don’t plan to make money from them. My “branding” is storytelling, art, art-related lolcows, and I guess that pesky culture war. People begged me to go fully political, but I think political is a step below philosophical, which is where I would rather go. I would rather explain the psychology and aesthetics of media, instead of repeating myself as to how offensive or woke something is. Yes, I make fun of Lindsay for being woke, but I explain why she is and where it comes from, which is something more important than some kind of drama farming that grifters do.
I would rather be a source of information than a pointless attack dog for someone above me, which is why I try to separate myself from the people who do such nonsense. I’m not with these movements, I don’t care to promote people I don’t care about, I’m not going to go easy on people just because “we’re on the same side”. Everyone gets made fun of or nobody gets made fun of, and I’m year of monkey, bitch. This monkey wants bananas and youtube is not going to supply any. But it supplies plenty of vines to swing around from, as I Donkey Kong my way from topic to topic.
Like anything else in life, videos need to be worth my time, meaning their expense needs to be dropped dramatically. Hour long, multi-hour long, these were excruciatingly hard to do. The next goal is to make sure everything is kept around 30min long, unless it’s going to be a bi-yearly 1 hour long video that will be the highlight of the year, which is where full book analysis videos come into play. The scripts for everything else will be written down as articles, with the better of the articles being made into low content videos.
Podcast style will be for low effort, being made weekly.
A new style will be for mid effort, which is where 30min of history or explanation is presented with video clips, being made monthly. Video game clips will be placed around here as well, unless they can be made bi-weekly.
And the classic, me in my room with my ASS computer, will be for the high content, for subjects that take far too long to make on a monthly basis.
This planning is still in the works, it’s an effort to create a strategy and a schedule for everything. The goal would be to place an hour a day per video, creating steps for each video, and using each other as progress reports for the bigger ones. It will be like placing smaller squares into bigger squares until the biggest square is complete, allowing me to visually determine my progress across such a subject. This is also a way for me to appear more productive, because content will be constantly coming out on a clear schedule. Only bad side about it is that this means 3 hours of my day are used for videos, and this won’t be possible for every day until content creation is my main job.
Before I can have this be a thing, it will be a slow, preemptive creation process, with smaller projects being made as my “short stories”, to then determine if I’m ready for a bigger “novel” of a project. And that’s how I have to approach video editing: the same way I would with storytelling. No more determining that length means better, or more time means more results. Now I’m going to obey the market, go for what’s expected of me, and react to feedback. If something doesn’t work, or doesn’t make a dent, I try something else.
I think that’s why people get mad at me, when they see that I am trying something else all the time. This is normal, but I’m told that I’m “an interloper” or “will never win” because I willingly give up on things that don’t work. Sorry, losers, but being unorganized and wasting my life is not worth it. I like money, and I like vaginas. If I wanted to be poor and wasting my life, I would have kept slamming my head against a wall and failing like most of what indie does.
And yes, the OPC reviews will be translated into videos, as well as my own short stories. I began as a crackpasta narrator, after all. I was thinking of putting a lot of radio drama production into my narrations, but I would want to keep them low effort until they start attracting all of the attention from their titles. A lot of people try to narrate their stories and they don’t make a spark anywhere with them. But as time goes on, and I get more videos under my belt, I could easily narrate for others, create a network, and get things going. It’s not that hard to get things working once you know what you’re doing.
The main time waste that we all fall for is chaotic activity and the lack of planning.

I am on my third unpaid medical leave in less than two years from my current job. I would like to keep working but I was told that if I miss more work I am going to get written up and likely eventually fired. I was advised to go on medical leave since my FMLA, sick and vacation time ran out.
I also don’t want to lose my health insurance from this job, it is pretty decent. I am not sure what to do next and how I can keep my job. I have well documented illnesses and I am also in the process of seeing if I qualify for disability in NYS. I would like to work when I can however if I take a sick day with no time, I will be written up and potentially fired.
A few months back I tried to get ADA accommodations where I would work from home but that was denied. I work in reception at a health clinic however last time I was back at work I was doing odds and ends for the whole building. So I don’t see why they denied it, I may try to ask for that accommodation again.
My place of employment also has a policy where after four months out on leave I have to pay my health insurance’s full premium which is about 1k per month (I can’t afford that).
Currently, I have at least 1-2 days where I am very ill and then I also have flare ups where I can be unwell from anywhere from days to weeks.
I am hoping if I qualify for disability I can at least work and I can be protected from getting fired but I don’t know if that is the case.
I have considered trying to work and getting fired but ultimately I need to work however I feel like I would just be fired all over again. I have had several jobs in the past not understand chronic illness or understandably needing me there to do my job.
I am accepting any feedback, ideas or personal experiences from people.
Thank you! ❤️

So glad I found this group. I have a serious problem and am at wits end.
I co-founded a company with my dad in the early 2000s after the dot-com meltdown. I thought since he appeared to successfully run multiple companies in the past, I Woukd gave a chance to see him in action.
Instead he decided to give me an honorary title which had nothing to do with my experience nor was one that the company needed or respected. Being the good son, I sucked it up as he continued to hire increasingly lower quality candidates and making bad business decision after another. The worst part was he paid me room and board and expected me to be in essence the company lackey doing whatever anyone else asked because he thought he could get away with it, but kind of made it sound like I worked for him leaving everyone confused.
I eventually managed to escape for a bit and rebuild my career even though my parents tried to sabotage me at every opportunity. During this time, they stressed me out so much I ended up losing those jobs because they refused to accept my boundaries and emotionally blackmailed me into taking their damaging advice.
Fast forward to 2017 or so. I was starting to establish myself as a corporate advisor and had a opportunity to teach at a highly respectable school, but once again their abuse was too much, forcing me to sell cell phones at Costco whike my dad continued to run the company into the ground. It was by far one if the worst jobs I ever had, but my mom stongarned my dad into hiring me, but at a salary where I made close to nothing, but at least I would finally be paid.
While this was going on, my dad barely made any money whe he stupidly paid everyone else market rate out of fear they would quit (which most of them did by 2021 during the "Great Resignation").
I managed to get a contract which gave me a brief break from my family at the end of 2021, but once again as soon as it ended they demanded I work with them despite having an offer to be a Director Marketing with a fast track to CMO in less than a year at a Tier - 4 company that I couldn't accept once again to emotional blackmail.
Fadt forward to this year. My dad officially made me officially work for a neurotic passive aggressive micro-manager that he hired instead of him despite knowing that I have the background and knowledge to get them out of their countless messes he made for himself. However, he's too afraid to let them go for some reason which I will never understand and refuses to fine me the time I need to get another job or to let me train on something else so I can.
I did manage to save some money along the way, but since most apartments around here ( SF Bay Area) expect you to make 3x the rent price to get an apartment. But yet again since he is paying me barely enough to pay my bills (when he can afford to pay me), I can't move out of their house very easily.
Couch surfing with friends isn't a viable option either and despite grinding as hard as I can to get another job that will give me the money to move out, I just can't seem to land one despite countless referrals, endorsements and introductions to the hiring teams as well as personally knowing the hiring managers themselves.
How do I move forward? I'm going to be 53 on May 20 and I feel like I truly lost 20+ years of my life due to this nonsense and don't know what to do.
Does anyone have any suggestions?

• Should I pack up everything I own and move somewhere cheaper or out of the country knowing I don't have a job lined up and don't know when I will? When arguing with my parents they always threaten me to do it, they stop at nothing to pull me into their web once I actually get away for a while.
  
• Should I try to move with relatives and risk bring disowned because my extended family thinks my mom is crazy and they don't need this drama in addition to their own problems?
  
• Should I buy a van and live in it so i can get away from them and have a form of transportation? I checked prices on Craigslist for a cheap one and they are still really expensive?
  
• Shoukd I risk living with a complete stranger that may steal my property or worse leaving me worse off than where I started?
  

Please help!

Doesn’t need my permission PT2 UPDATE
For those who read my first thread on this situation and was waiting for an update, I have one for you.
My hubby spoke to his mom yesterday about the comment she made as well as why she doesn’t call me and only calls him. Let me tell you IMO I feel she manipulated the situation and played victim, and my hubby failed me and I’m just extremely sad about it.
She told him that, she didn’t explain herself properly when she said that comment. When she never took time to correct herself… she meant she doesn’t need my permission to hold my son.
She told him that, she doesn’t call me because she’s giving me space. When it was only after I ignored her messages after saying the permission comment to me, as well as I was extremely vulnerable about my feelings and feeling unsupported by her and she skipped over my emotions. Just said “The Lord will fix any miscommunication within the family” which is why I’m NC. No point in talking to someone who doesn’t care about how I feel in this chapter of my life when all I need is support.
She told him that she wants me to accept her, call her grandma or mom… and that she wants to have a better relationship with me then she does with her own son. She wants to be “super close”. When she had multiple opportunities to be, when I had been vulnerable and she did nothing, wasn’t there for me nothing. So I don’t believe this shit she’s telling him, because not once has she come to me with that kind of energy. It’s always been selfish energy and about her grandparent experience.
Sadly he fell for it, and he’s now telling me don’t bring anything up to rehash (when I’m someone who needs to talk things out to truly get over them, not roll over). He said how is his mom not showing she cares for me when she’s willing to pay for our plane tickets to go visit and let us stay with her…
I told him, because she’s telling you one thing and can’t take time to tell me any of this. If she truly felt that way she had multiple opportunities to tell me she wants to be close to me, not that I’m ungrateful, not respectful, I need to spend time with her to get to know her and that she doesn’t need my permission with my son… HELLO?!?
This turned into a huge argument between him and I because he can’t admit I’m actually right. He himself doesn’t believe if someone says they’re sorry, but not directly to the person it’s not genuine. Oh but the rules change because it’s his mom I see… you care for me only up to an extent then. And that reality has been hurting my heart I’ve been crying since yesterday. It makes me feel guilty to be so sad around my happy son.
I feel so betrayed by my partner. He’s like you need to move past it because we have to go down there in August. I said “I don’t function as your family does with sweeping things under the rug so I need time.” He said “That’s why I’m bringing it up early so by then you’ve had enough time.”
I couldn’t when he was saying this, and told me as well if I’m not willing to go in august we’re going to have a problem… Like he forgets what I’ve gone through for him, and also that I’m taking his shit because he might lose his job. Didn’t tell his mom that. But I’m horrible for holding a grudge against his mom for not being honest and coming to me about these things she’s telling him?? Like am I crazy?!
Like he tries to address our son as other people’s kid… and gets upset at me for being upset at that. Like I’m I crazy??
I told him I can be cordial with them, and he responded with “you being cordial isn’t talking and I’m carrying the conversations.” I told him what else is there to talk about then how she’s doing, how’s work, her health, and renovations in her home? I’m the new parent in motherhood. I don’t see what else I should be going out of my way talking to someone who’s a liar about honestly…
That’s the update you guys. My hubby sucks and I’m sad. I truly don’t matter.