I'm a department head in my store. Currently pregnant, but nowhere near ready to go on leave. We had a manager meeting to attend today. As we were concluding, another manager (who is known for making snarky remarks, but is friends with everyone. Super cliquey vibe in my store) said "oh! Since this is happening next week, does that mean I can take over [my department]?" And gave me a dirty look. Everyone laughed like it was an inside joke they've been waiting to unleash. Store manager included. Only one other manager gave everyone a "wtf" face with me. Totally came out of left field.
I'm not into the cliques and gossip. I have my friends at work like everyone else and I try to be nice to everyone. I'm laid back, don't really mind if people leave early as long as their work is done, and they all seem to team up when I'm not there to complete tasks. It's a healthy dynamic that I work hard to maintain, and it has paid off since I began running this department. I have not heard any complaints, but have made sure all of my people know they can come to me if anything could be improved. This job sucks enough. I don't want to be the reason people are miserable to be there.
Managers see me as an easy target to give an attitude to when they're having a bad day because I'm not intimidating. The past couple of weeks, they've been especially terrible. They're blaming it on inventory, but I don't see them treating anyone else this way.
Today, as I was heading down to start working, I heard two managers muttering to each other about me before I even left the room. This happened after one of the managers just dumped a million things on me that have literally nothing to do with me.
My problem is, suddenly everyone seems so hostile toward me without ANY explanation, without ANY constructive criticism, without ANY discussion of any kind. They'll smile and say hi, then snicker as soon as I walk away. If I'm doing something wrong, I'd like to know so I can do better instead of hearing embarrassing comments in front of everyone about how another manager could do my job better than me, and doesn't even know anything about it. I've always done what was asked of me, and I had a great trainer, so I know what I'm doing. I'm truly clueless as to what's going on. How do I not take this personally? Am I crazy? I took all of my personal items out of my office today, and I'm fully prepared to just not go back since they seem so much better off without me.

I am here but I’m there
In that space where you reside Where you accept my thoughts and we exchange witty banter Building something innocently and blindly
Until the two worlds collide
And then it’s like Face eyes mouth teeth breath Guitar drums bass flash
Talk. Not even talk is the right word. Connect? Laugh. Drift. Busy but eyes on each other. Reconnect. Deep connect.
The after.
I could write a million things. About the gentleness with which you shut the door. The ease and comfort I felt.
I won’t describe the make and model. I’m laughing as I type this. The Russian bodyguard’s bald head gleamed a little brighter than the neon sign through your dashboard.
Didn’t even think about it until it I thought about how you maybe felt about it. We crossed a lot of lines and made up for two decades.
It was a lot. It’s still a lot.
I could say that it weighs on me but it’s more like a delightful buoyant space in time that reminds me I’m alive. I really care about you and consider myself lucky to be someone who connected with you in space and time. Happy birthday.

I’ve just learned the term, which definitely matches this behaviour somewhat, but not entirely. For me, instead of these false promises (sometimes not promises, but offers/suggestions) happening in front of other people, they are in private. So it isn’t for applause from anybody else, it’s literally just between us.
And mostly, instead of it being something that gets deferred over and over or denied (though that absolutely occurs too), if I stupidly let myself believe it this time (always after questioning it openly and asking for more concrete details and being assured that it’s feasible and affordable and they want to do it!) and actually go along with it a little and start doing my research and picking out whatever it is I’ve been promised… it gets thrown back in my face if I DARE bring this up. Because I am so spoilt and ungrateful and entitled to think that they could just pay for x/buy me y, and am I stupid because I just think money grows on trees? And I will get screamed at for this. Bearing in mind that always I also have been nagged about picking out said thing for days/weeks/months and bullied into going along with it.
It’s always something offered to me, not something I actually ask for or expect, and literally it ranges from very small amounts of money (like ten quid) to a lot more than that. And I do not understand it. It’s a mindfuck, because sometimes these things do have followthrough, so I can’t actually bank on it being a load of horseshit! It is impossible to tell what is a trap and what isn’t—except a good 50% of the time, even if they actually come through for me, they make it VERY CLEAR what a burden I am to them and how this is all my fault.
It just hurts, even after all this time. There are things that were total lies that were promised to me that actually, genuinely could have helped me so much and helped me get out of here and made myself less of a burden. The things that were followed through on, don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful, but they didn’t make an actual difference in my life.
The other day another false promise was made in a throwaway comment and it broke my heart because I knew it was a lie by how dismissive they suddenly became when I said I had been looking at the same thing. It could have changed all our lives for the better. But nope, not allowed.
And today, again, I was asked if I wanted to do something and they would pay, and was told to go get it sorted right away. I said I would at some point soon then. And immediately, literally without even me doing anything to make it a reality, they started on the guilt trip and telling me that I’m costing them so much money because of this and it’s so difficult and unfair. So I was like, oh, okay, that’s fine then, I don’t need to do it. And they got so angry at me for that too! And started hounding me and demanding to know why I didn’t want to anymore. I said that I needed to wait until I was feeling better anyway, so I can’t book it anyway, so it doesn’t matter if it’s not feasible. Which isn’t even a lie. And they seemed to accept this but then a few seconds later just started hounding me again and got violently angry when I wouldn’t engage and just said “no thanks, it’s fine,” to the bombardment, and started angrily banging shit around and crumpling up stuff in my face and being generally threatening. And they got mad that I disengaged entirely and left, so they had to stomp up behind me a few minutes later to crash and bang in the rooms adjacent.
Like. What do they achieve by this, because it can’t be just about ego and public recognition if it’s entirely private. And is it strictly ‘future faking’ if it’s a setup to make me feel like the most evil, entitled POS on earth?

My boyfriend (28) and I (24)have been or were dating for the past 9 months. With us being two guys it was a pretty significant relationship because this usually isn’t common for gay men.
Whole situation:
My boyfriend was straight when we first met each other and we hit it off pretty well. It felt natural considering we didn’t meet through an app and we weren’t looking for each other. I thought he was so pretty and later on did I find out he also thought the same thing about me. That night with our group of friends he continued to flirt and make jokes with me to the point where my friend was offended thinking he was gay baiting me. Sparing all the details of that night. Nothing sexual happened but we had good chemistry for barely knowing each other. Of course this confused him but after messaging some people to get my number he finally got in contact with me
My boyfriend made significantly less money than me considering I’m a veteran and also a medical professional and I think this caused a bit of insecurity with him even though I assured him I never cared. A few months into our relationship we were at dinner with some friends. We were all heavily drinking and I made a joke about being able to afford the car I have now. Just poking at him but it extremely hurt his feelings which I realized immediately. We went to his house and he was still visibly upset but I had to go home so I asked if he wanted to come over so that way I can be there for him since he was hurting.
This is where it gets complicated - I eventually asked him what was wrong after we made it to mine because he was sulking. He then told me how the joke was not funny and it hurt him so I apologized and assured him again that I did not mean to offend him. I promised I wouldn’t even make a joke or bring up financial topics again. He then became aggravated as (us both still intoxicated) he began getting loud and saying that we have nothing in common and the only thing I’ve done is made him miserable. He stated he felt trapped and then he said “what is even the point of us dating” he continue to yell at me as he was storming out. He ignored me as he waited for an Uber and declined to let me drive him home. He even walked down the street just so he wouldn’t be waiting in front of my apartment. At this time I continued to drink so much to the point where I was spilling wine everywhere. He wouldn’t respond to me over the phone. Not even to tell me he was safe.
I felt as if we had just broken up because of his aggravation and statements. (Sober me did not think this). I ended up downloading Grindr and convincing myself that he hated me and I drunkenly drove to a randos house to hook up. Which was extremely stupid. (I used to hook up with strangers during bad times in my life, of course this only hurt me. I think I was reverting back to my old ways of wanting to feel wanted). As I met the guy I began to sober up and realized I did not want to do this anymore but long story short, I was afraid to leave the hookup after he had been waiting and was aroused and I was also in his home, and I felt like he had a lot of potential to hurt me if wanted. So I just gave him a bj and left. As soon as I left I felt guilt in my life I had never felt before and I immediately deleted the app and vowed to tell my BF immediately.
The next day in the morning I told him what happened and assured him it was because of my immaturity that I did that and I never wanted to do anything like that again in my life as it hurt me so bad and this hurt him even more. He continued to tell me that he wanted to hurt me and that I can’t love him because I can’t even love my self. And some more stuff that extremely hurt my self esteem but at the time I thought I deserved it. Then he told me to get out of his house. He broke up with me via text 2 days later.
A few days passed and we decided to stay together as we both messed up. Me more than him though. I loved him and told him that my own actions caused me to cheat but I wasn’t thinking of the consequences and that in no way was it because I didn’t like him. But because I felt alone and hurt by how he treated me that night.
Our sex life was about once a month after this. He wanted to do something every day but I felt guilt every time he wanted to sleep with me. He also made a statement to me that hurt me so bad and I can’t put on here. He said he didn’t mean it but it made me ashamed to have sex at all ever again. He also stated a few months later that because I don’t have as much sex with him that it’s affecting his mental health and it doesn’t matter how I feel anymore but that I need to start putting out.
I’m also on SSRIs so it’s extremely hard for me to orgasm so every time we had sex it felt like it was just for him and I told him this. So when we weren’t together I would masterbate. He told me he does also but that I shouldn’t and that I should only be having satisfaction from him. I had sex toys before the relationship and he told me that they were disgusting and that I can’t use them. He even told me to throw some away. They were just regular phallic toys.
We continued to date for about 7 more months with resentment building up towards each other understandably.
Ending:
Last week I was already upset about our relationship and wanted to sit down and talk about it. But before I got the chance he hurt my feelings even more. I had just gotten my dream car, reasonably gonna talk about it. It also was 70k so I think it offended him that I could have the luxury of getting something so expensive. Last week I simply stated I wanted to get a modification done to the car and he told me he’s tired of hearing about the car and that I need to stop talking about it. He said I cared about the car more than him just because I talked about it. I also had a junk car before so I was just proud of myself. At this point I decided I can’t be happy anymore as he’s always getting upset with me. So we both agreed to split up. (Throughout our relationship he said “I love you” about 5 times for every time I said it just because I had a hard time showing I cared sometimes, at times I felt as him I didn’t love him enough because he loved me so much). I told him I want to remain friends and he agreed but now he stopped speaking to me altogether. I loved him and he “loved” me so how could he just drop me so fast. I know it takes time to heal from this but I feel like I just lost my best friend also and I don’t know what to do.

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I don’t follow Rhone closely.
A few years ago I got a pair of Versatility unlined shorts (inseam 6.5” from the archived product page). I see Rhone doesn’t make this version anymore. Their shorts lineup looks different to how I remember it. Now there’s more prominent branding, exterior drawstring waistband, etc.
What’s the closest option to Versatility in the current lineup? Or a style from a different brand?
What I like about Versatility: -tapered through the thigh (updated LLL Pace Breakers flare out, but maybe I should try going down a size)
-no slit on hem (but could consider otherwise)
-inseam (I feel hemmed LLL doesn’t turn out the same)
-good for gym, casual leisure, slightly nice leisure
-side pockets plus zipper pocket
-indifferent about weight. Rhone’s heavier fabric is a big no for some
I haven’t tried Vuori but I don’t like the branding on the front of the shorts.
Suggestions? Thanks!

Just finished a 10 day mediterranean cruise on Resilient lady. Having only previously cruised on Scarlet lady in early 2022 at a third capacity on a 5 day Caribbean itinerary, I thought I would share my impressions.

1. This cruise was at capacity which I was worried about how the experience would differ. Overall, it did not feel busy to us. We didn't really have to wait in any lines, we were able to see all the shows we wanted, and we were able to book all the dinner reservations and gym classes we wanted. I will note that we knew to book restaurants as soon as we got on the ship and as soon as the exercise classes opened at 3pm. In comparison, this recent experience was much more lively and active. The previous cruise was creepy at times with venues often being empty.
2. This cruise seemed like a much older crowd than our previous experience- they said average age was 52. We are in our late 30's and it didn't seem like there were many younger passengers. With that said, the 5 day Caribbean itineraries are more likely to have a younger party crowd so we were partly expecting this to be an older demographic. There were a number of people who walked out of some of the performances making comments about having an agenda pushed down their throat, but overall, didn't feel like the "come as you are" vibe was impacted. The only issue I saw was that many of the older passengers seemed to not be aware of the option to order at your table in the galley. Most mornings, there were lines forming at the various breakfast counters unnecessarily, which made it often difficult to walk around. We ordered from the staff at our table and were able to be served and complete our meal within 30 minutes. So keep in mind you can use the red flag to order at the table- no need to line up! Another concern was that there were a lot of obviously sick older people coughing, etc. The amount of times we saw people touch things without using the readily available hand sanitizers after wiping their noses and coughing was quite astonishing. Yes, this happens on all cruises, but this seemed a bit more frequent than we have seen before.
3. All of the port tender and shuttles went really smoothly! Longest we had to wait for a shuttle was about 10 min in Crete. Disembarkation was also super quick as we were off the ship carrying our luggage within 10 min.
4. We bought the 5 day thermal spa pass for $259 each person. We aren't big party people or drinkers, so we would often go to the spa in the evening after dinner. If you do this, note that on one of the days you get a special sugar scrub and lotion to use as part of the mud room which was lovely!
5. We had a $600 bar tab which we used despite not drinking much. We had specialty coffees at each breakfast and also bought non-alcoholic drinks such as Humm Kombucha and Kin Euphorics. Also, each restaurant and bar seemed to have at least one or more non-alcoholic or low alcoholic options. Finally, if we did decide to have a drink, we splurged on expensive glasses of wine (Caymus, Moet, etc) which was a nice experience.
6. We booked an excursion at each port and all were pretty great experiences. Of note, I didn't think the excursion prices were that much more expensive than what I found on trip advisor, etc, so I preferred to book with the ship for flexibility and securing tender spots where needed.
7. One of the few negative experiences we had was the room location. I mentioned we aren't big on partying and treated this trip as more of a wellness and relaxation vacation. We booked an XL sea terrace about a year before the trip using a travel agent. I didn't bother to look at the room location and unfortunately we had 8330Z, which had a speaker from the Red Room right below. I'm not kidding when I say the room shook from the sound system- to the point where we had to disassemble the mini fridge shelves and pull out the drawers as they were knocking around so much and the noise was absurd. Even if you were hard of hearing, the vibration and shaking alone would make it impossible to relax and fall asleep. We reached out to sailor services who said they could offer ear plugs, but that was it. Luckily on the 2nd day, sailor services called us and offered us a room change to 11350A, an XL sea terrace (without hammock), which we gladly accepted. Note that Red Room entertainment goes to 11pm, so this would only be a problem if you are early to bed and early risers like us.
8. We had on board credit so decided to do the behind the scenes tour. It was definitely a good one-time experience and we learned a lot of interesting aspects. For example, all the restaurants cook the plates per order (yes there's prep, but there's not plates just sitting under a warmer waiting to be served). All pastries are made on ship. One of the striking impressions was that the staff seem to genuinely enjoy their job. Several times they said they were promoted quickly, there's lots of perks including being able to eat at the restaurants and book excursions, and they liked that they can show their tattoos, piercings, have hair of any color, etc. They also said there's purposely no visible rankings, uniform differences, or countries of origin listed. They want everyone treated with the same level of respect- you may actually have encountered the captain and not know it. It's a bit refreshing from the over the top interactions that staff on other cruise lines show. Staff seem genuinely in a good mood on Virgin.
9. Overall, this solidified that we love Virgin Voyages. We did an Alaska itinerary on Royal Caribbean (Quantum of the Seas) last summer and Virgin is a much better experience in our opinion. On RC, we felt like everything was an upsell or shopping centric and run down (yes it is an older ship than Resilient but it seemed grimy). Areas were over crowded on RC and overall felt chaotic. Virgin seemed to have longer stays in the ports than we have experienced on RC (less concerned with shopping and casino sales?) Also, not having kids on the cruise makes a big difference. Food is much better on Virgin, apart from us really liking the sushi restaurant on Quantum- note that we did the unlimited specialty restaurant package on Quantum as we thought the dining room quality had gone down and we don't like buffets. Overall, I feel that while Virgin is more expensive up front, it is a better quality experience. We will likely go on another RC cruise as my parents are avid cruisers and won't try another line despite our encouragement, but we are definitely sold on the Virgin experience. We used the book your next voyage promotion on the ship and will be going on Brilliant Lady in 2026 in a suite. Having a suite on the 2022 voyage and an XL terrace on this recent voyage, we feel the cost is worth it for the suite, although the XL sea terrace was still a very nice experience.

Happy to answer any questions you have!

Okay, so for this post there are a lot of people involved (this has been going on for a while) so I'll list up here who's who. This is my wife's family. I'll be using code names when appropriate:
Father-in-law - FIL
Mother-in-law - MIL
Wife(oldest daughter) - Wife
Second daughter - Sarah
Third daughter - Lana
Fourth daughter - Ruth
Second daughter's husband - BIL
Third daughter's fiancee - Karl
My daughter - daughter
Second daughter's older son - Danny
Second daughter's younger son - Aaron
And me as me
I know this is long but bear with me TL;DR Brother-in-law has snapped the last straw for the family and we are all starting to cut ties with him

 BIL's family has their own side of the story that I'm barely familiar with, so it won't be brought up here. We first met BIL way before they got together; Sarah bought a house as a group of friends with her boyfriend at the time, and BIL and his second wife at the time. We didn't interact with him much. We just heard a few stories about him from their friend group. Eventually this situation broke down and BIL and his second wife left and vandalized Sarah's home on the way out. They let their dogs poop all over the floor, stole some miscellaneous items, poured water in their lawn mower gas tank, etc. He did this to Sarah, his future third wife. We thought this guy was out of our lives forever. Sarah eventually came to stay on my couch after she sold the house. She lived with me and my wife for roughly 3 months. Then she went and rented an apartment a few miles away. No sooner than a few weeks did we find out she was dating future BIL, and a few weeks after that we found she was pregnant. He met the family and stated that he wanted to be a part of it. He blamed all his past transgressions on his second wife. We questioned him at the time if he was still with his second wife. He said no, and that he was officially divorced. My wife looked up the public court records and found out that he didn't file divorce papers until 11 days after we asked that question. A small lie but considering our history of knowing him it was concerning. BIL is a big gun enthusiast. About 1 months after they told us Sarah was pregnant, while cleaning a gun at home he shot himself in the hand. Again, we were concerned but Sarah assured us he was a changed man and this was just an unfortunate accident. His hand healed but he didn't do his physical therapy that seriously so his hand is still kind of jacked up. I feel this is important because he kind of has a history of not following through on what he says. During Sarah's pregnancy we found out that BIL seriously beat one of their dogs back when they bought the house together. We also figured out he diagnosed himself with bipolar, but refused to go to a doctor to get an actual diagnosis. The whole family at the time was distracted by all of this because during Sarah's pregnancy my wife went through a major medical struggle that resulted in multiple surgeries and a months-long stay in the hospital. We were so focused on that the BIL details just kind of came and went at that moment. Sarah gave birth to Danny during COVID lockdown. We were so excited and we all were very active in Danny's life. Time would pass and we just kind of got used to BIL being despite the fact that he often would miss family events. BIL and Sarah would move into a house on my in-laws property just down the road from in-laws house. MIL became their primary caregiver as she could work it around her job and still make decent money. As 4 years have passed my MIL, FIL, Lana, my Wife and I all take shifts of watching their now 2 kids for them, for free. MIL also watches my daughter but significantly less that their son's. 2 years would pass after Danny was born and everything seemed OK. There would just be hints in they way he talked about who he really was. He would say something in casual conversation like "man, there seems like there are too many black people in commercials these days" or "I don't know why we are forcing women's sports to be a thing." Bigoted stuff like that, but veiled enough so there was plausible deniability. I would often call him out on it, so he really grew to not like me. This all changed at his 30th bday. He had a big party with a lot of alcohol and weed with dozens of friends. My wife and I didn't go because we are not party people. Lana and Ruth went to the party. Sarah was also there. During this party BIL went outside and decided to "mud" his jeep through the creek beside their house. This was possibly with Karl but I'm not sure of that to this day. Karl has recently come into the picture prior to this event and was previously friends with BIL for a long time. The jeep got stuck and flooded for obvious reasons. After trying to get it out of the creek by multiple means, they gave up and left it there. I believe it took almost 2 days to get it out. He went back to the party and as everyone got progressively drunk and high, my 2 sister-in-laws Lana and Ruth (I believe) criticized BIL for getting his car stuck in a creek while playing. BIL verbally assaulted them and demanded they get out of his house. They left in tears. They drove separately, and Lana had gotten buzzed so they both got in Ruth's car and drove to my house. They sat and vented to my wife and I for a while, and eventually I offered that we should go do something fun to take their minds off of it. My wife and I drove them to Taco Bell and we got some food and drove around town for a while and made jokes in the car. After they cooled off and were in a better mood they said that Lana needed to go get her car from the party. In a flurry she accidentally left her keys inside her sister's and BIL's house. We drove them over just in case anything sketchy happened but Lana and Ruth didn't want us to go inside, so we waited out in the car. She didn't think it would be a big deal to walk in, but as her and Ruth did BIL immediately got in her face and demanding she gets out or else. Ruth went to talk to someone else at the party and didn't notice this at first. BIL shoved Lana against a wall and held her there. Everyone apparently stood in stunned silence as this happened. He then shoved her to the ground, grabbed her around the ankles and started pulling her across the floor. As he was threatening to do even worse, Ruth ran up and jumped on his back and gave him a head lock. She screamed at him to stop but before BIL could anything about this everyone finally woke up and pulled them apart. Ruth helped Lana up and they ran out of the house onto the front porch sobbing. My wife saw this and got out of the car and yelled at them to get back in our car. We drove up to the in-laws house. By then it was past midnight. MIL was about an hour away working her job and FIL was up in his room asleep. The sisters went and woke him up and explained the situation through tears. They also called MIL to inform her of the situation. He got ready and ask me to go with him down to the house to get some answers. The sisters stayed up at the house. We drove down in his car and when we got out the entire party was ready for us and greeted us at the car. Literally over a dozen people, most of whom I did not recognize started screaming what happened at both of us simultaneously. Everyone was clearly very drunk. FIL looked overwhelmed, so I raised my hands and tried asking everyone to stop for a second and go one by one telling their bit of the story. BIL stopped me mid sentence and pointed his finger in my face. I noticed he had his other hand on a holstered hand gun. He yelled out "You don't have a say here! You're barely even part of this family." For context, I had been with my wife for over 11 years at that time and he hadn't even married Sarah yet and had been there about 2 1/2 years. FIL backed up and told me that I need to stop talking and that I was being a problem. I backed off and went over the yard to Sarah and Karl. I asked Sarah what happened and she told me that she didn't see what happened and that she wasn't very aware of what was going on now. Karl would barely answer the same question. I walked back over to FIL but he told me to back off and that I really wasn't needed there. Admittedly I felt pretty insulted and just decided to walk back to his house and get my car and go home with my wife. We eventually left after FIL came back to the house. We found out later that BIL had pulled his gun out and threatened to kill himself if FIL didn't leave. Out of fear of what he would do, my in-laws were pretty afraid to take action at this point. A lot of the situation was his word against someone else's and Sarah went on a tour around to the friends and convinced them not to take any of this to the police. She then tried to smooth things over with the family and offered that BIL would apologize to everyone. He then refused, stating that Ruth was the real aggressor and that she assaulted him. He eventually agreed to apologize to just FIL for causing a problem and I think some half-hearted apologies to Lana and Ruth. The whole situation was swept under the rug but an unease has existed over the family since then. He stopped coming to family events pretty much altogether. About 4 months after this situation, prior to my daughter being born, he told MIL he was going to bring Danny up to their house so she could watch him for a few hours while he took a nap. His job works long hours so this wasn't out of the ordinary. However, he didn't show up for a while and my MIL started questioning what going on. She called but there was no answer. She drove down to his house and knocked but there wasn't an answer, only Danny crying in the background. She let herself in and found BIL asleep on the couch with Danny actively trying to wake him up. MIL tried to wake him up but nothing for a few minutes. She gave up and wrote a note to let him know where Danny was. BIL didn't notice Danny was gone for 2 hours. He finally woke up, drove up to in-laws house, and yelled at my MIL for just taking Danny without informing him. He took Danny and then left. A few months after that, after my daughter was born, He fell asleep while watching Danny again. This time we found out because when he woke up the front door was open and Danny was gone. He called in-laws for help finding him. My in-laws have a large property (about 200 acres) with a ton of it forested. Danny wandered 1/4 of a mile into the woods and I believe it took roughly a little over an hour to find him. Family questioned him hard this time but he just recoiled back into their house and didn't talk to us much. Sarah continued to defend him and said it was just an accident. Again the police were not notified about any of this. There was always this idea that if we went to authorities about any of this they would just run for it. They would then surprise everyone with the news that they were pregnant again, despite the fact that Sarah had used the morning after pill. This whole time they hadn't married yet. They announced that they were getting married but Sarah told Lana that it was mostly just to help BIL not have to go through bankruptcy a second time. I wasn't sure if this would do anything to help that situation, but that's what Sarah said at one point leading up to the wedding. About a month before the wedding, however, he threatened Sarah that if she insisted on inviting my wife to the wedding he would demand to invite a friend of his that Sarah hated. This friend also used to date BIL I believe. This was his ploy to force Sarah to not invite my Wife or me. The 2 other sisters and MIL all stood in solidarity with us and said that they would also not go if we weren't invited. He eventually relented and they got married a little before Aaron was born. As more kids were added, MIL's childcare duties got much harder. Eventually my wife and I started paying her (not much but something at least. $150 a month) to watch our daughter, but we also did chores for her, bought her food often, and eventually my Wife started taking a few shifts to watch all 3 children. To date, BIL and Sarah have never compensated any of us for our work. It's a little frustrating but we've tried to understand because Sarah and BIL seem to be bad with money. They objectively make more than us yet can't afford to pay MIL anything. Last Thanksgiving, in the middle of dinner, Sarah and BIL decided to have an "intervention" and talk about how we were not treating BIL fairly. They addressed everybody but really honed in on me specifically. This seemed to be because the rest of the family kind of dance in eggshells around them, while to be frank I'm pretty honest about how I feel about them. They seemed to think I was causing the family to turn against him and questioned why I would do that. I told him he lacked humility. He said he didn't understand. I told him that if he admitted to his mistakes and actually apologized about any of the stuff I previously wrote, instead of blaming everyone and everything else then the whole family would feel a bit different about him. A lot of talk was about the 30th b-day and other times when I just ignored him and how he had already apologized about the party. I reminded him that he didn't apologize to most of the family and he blamed Ruth. He then stated that Ruth was the cause of a lot of the problems at that party. He also made a big deal about how the family doesn't trust him with my daughter and kept emphasizing how he has never held her. We finally tried to come to an agreement. I told him I would try to talk to him more and try to understand him better and he said he would try to come to family events more. He also wanted more of a relationship with my daughter. We left and my wife and I were skeptical but we said that if this is who Sarah really wanted to be with, as long as BIL wasn't perceived as a threat he could have more contact with our daughter. We have had way more of a relationship with his kids than he has had with our daughter so I tried to sympathize with that imbalance. Karl also stated later that having known BIL for a long time, he thought he was very sincere. To date, BIL has not asked or tried at any family events to spend any time with my daughter, despite having numerous opportunities. Now to the current situation. About a month ago Lana and Karl announced that Lana was pregnant. This was a revelation due to Lana having a medical condition that made it harder to get pregnant. A lot of excitement was brewing in the family because of this. Karl has been seeming like a good partner to Lana, and proposed to her a little before the pregnancy happened. This is especially pertinent because Lana and Karl moved into a house together right beside BIL and Sarah. A few days ago they were over at Sarah and BIL's house when an argument broke out between Sarah and BIL. BIL demanded that Sarah wasn't an "obedient enough wife" and that if she wanted there marriage to work then she was going to have to get better at serving him. She was upset and they weren't coming to an agreement so he was going to leave, but apparently he was very high so Sarah refused to give him the keys to his car. He got extremely mad and then got a gun, held it to his head, and threatened to kill himself if she didn't hand over the keys. Fortunately, Danny and Aaron were taking a nap during all of this. Sarah called the police during this whole exchange and the operator heard a lot of what BIL said over the phone so based on that they arrived at the house. He apparently drove away and it took the police a bit to find him but once they did he turned himself over. They admitted him to a mandatory 72-hour stay at a psychiatric ward for a mental health assessment. Sarah then came up to the rest of the family (not me or my Wife) and gave them Danny and Aaron. She then went and confided with Lana and Karl about how abusive BIL had been and how life was just miserable right now. A lot of us, especially Karl and my in-laws, were telling her that she needs to leave BIL and file for emergency custody of her children. She seemed to be listening to us and turning a corner, but inexplicably the psychiatric ward allowed BIL to have a phone call with Sarah and they had a long conversation. Suddenly, Sarah shut us all out and completely changed her story. She started defending BIL again. BIL was then let out of the psychiatric ward a day early. Since Karl was working at the time, Lana came to stay with us and then over at her in-laws. We are especially concerned about her safety around BIL due to her being pregnant. They have since cut nearly all contact with us for 4 days now. They have only told Karl that they were getting a new TV because the old one mysteriously broke somehow. They have continued to post on social media like nothing has happened. They have spent 2 days with BIL's family so we aren't sure what their opinion of this is, though we do know a sibling of his has also told Sarah to leave him prior to this latest situation. We don't know what their plans for childcare is because they are wholly reliant upon us. Lana is very reluctant to ever be home alone. Ruth is as well. There are so many other details I haven't mentioned. There have been holes in walls they've had to fix. There is some evidence that BIL is cheating on Sarah, but that evidence is somewhat inconclusive. The bigoted comments for a while now have gotten increasingly misogynistic. It's a lot of 'we need to respect proper gender roles' kind of stuff. There's just too much and I've already written a book on here. I don't really know what to do at this point. Because a lot of this stuff has been swept under the rug it's hard to tell how seriously CPS or police would take our claims. FIL has threatened to kick them out of their very cheap rental they're in now. Who knows what they would do in that scenario. I know this post is detailed and because of that BIL or Sarah might see it, but at this point I wonder if I even give a shit. They've already eluded to keeping their sons from us in the past and the vibes we are getting now is that they are already doing it. And from the bottom of my heart, fuck BIL. 

I love your big cheeks when you smile. You always wanted to get braces, but I love your teeth the way they are.
I love your soft heart. I’d always admire how you cry. I’m sorry I made you cry so much sometimes. I’m too much like my parents.
I love that you always want to grow and how you can look forward. I’m so proud of you. I’m so grateful I was there to see you get your degree, to see you move out, to be part of your life.
I love that you love yellow and sunflowers and the sky. You were always so bright. I also don’t like it now too, because whenever I see something happy, I think of you, and it makes me really sad. Being happy makes me sad.
If art was for me, music was for you. I miss hearing you hum and sing. You’re a great singer. I can’t listen to soft songs anymore.
I loved giving you my last bite every time. Sitting across from you made me happy. It was always enough for me to just be with you. I didn’t need any gifts or flowers or letters, but I got those too anyway.
Sometimes you’d slap your big belly, and I’d slap it too. I liked that. Do you remember when I’d cuff your sleeves before work? Or run to get your hairbrush one more time? How you’d scare me through the window while I washed the dishes? How I’d hug you at the door when you came home? Scrubbing your back in the shower? Waking you up just so I could remind you that I love you? I miss calling you over so you could just lay on top of me. When we rolled on the floor after moving into your new apartment.
My friends and family say I idealize you too much. But I don’t think so. I did the cliche thing, the important healing step, where I made a list of all the pet peeves and transgressions. But it didn’t feel right, hating you or villainizing you. You had your flaws, your quirks and those were fine with me. It just reminded me you were human. The weird way you sleep, how’d you get a little too angry at video games, how you’d be too anxious to go out sometimes. I love the human you.
Sometimes I wish you were horrible to me, to make this easier. Everyone else I talk to had horrible exes, mean ones. When I listen to their stories, it’s not you I think about. It’s me, maybe. Maybe that’s what I am to you.
I went to Chickfila and Cheesecake Factory on my own to try and replace our memories. I took myself to brunch and looked at the colors of the floor, the ceilings and the letters hanging on the wall to stay grounded. I browsed the shelves of the Korean Mart where I’d buy you snacks and looked at the chocolate bar selection at Aldi’s. I went to an arcade with new strangers I met and tried to win myself my own prize.
My therapist asked me to recall a happy memory, a content one. I told her about how I drove your car over the Golden Gate Bridge. We stopped at the viewing vista over the San Francisco Bay, and I kissed you on the cheek as I took a picture. It was my favorite picture of us, I had it printed so many times and pinned to my wall. In that memory, I felt safe, I felt warm, I felt content, I felt loved.
I hate how you said I never loved you, how I am unable to love. What is this feeling then? And where does this pain come from, if not my shattered heart?
Because I love you, I’m supposed to let you go. Be happy for you and send you off with love. But you’re not here anyway, so I hope it’s okay if I hold on for a little while longer. Write you a letter, or two, and look for you in every song lyric and in every flower by the street. Think of you as the clouds pass by and feel you in my chest when I find a laugh.

I wish any member of city leadership had, prior to now, shown one tenth of the fire and fervor of Kyle Dukes Pike in today's city council meeting. I wish at any point in the last six months that they'd stood their ground for something that really mattered. I wish they had such integrity.
But today, when Kyle was obliquely accused of shenanigans and unfair dealings with his company and city council position, there it was! How dare you! If you've got something to me, bring it to me and say it! Don't start spreading crap here, file an ethics complaint!
None of these white "men" has ever had to make a moral stand before in their lives, and they're all afraid to. It's a shame that the only time any one of them has been passionate in one of these meetings, it wasn't about cops lurking and doing illegal things... not the night of September 29th, and not in the intervening month.. There's been no passion about Lt. Renshaw leading the charge to harass the bejeezus out of citizens and taxpayers. There's been crickets about crooked cops. Nothing that would affect these upper middle class white men. It was over potential business contracts and ethics concerns and money, and how dare someone besmirch the name of Pike.
What's a man's life worth? What's our safety worth? A huge chunk of DPD leadership stood in court Friday and swore on a bible in front of a judge that they haven't got the first, faintest, or foggiest fuck of a clue as to what's going on in their own department or how the opinions of the city have been swayed or who's been leaking information. Oh, except for Lt. Phil--they all managed to pussyfoot before agreeing that he might be bad and that something ought to be done, maybe, but they can't without four votes.

I grew up homeschooled, with four siblings in the house but I still spent every minute alone that I could get. Psychologically I might as well be an only child. My mom recently told me she used to think I didn't like her because I never wanted to spend time with her, or anyone. Now that I have a job I keep being surprised at what a drive my coworkers have to talk to each other while they work. But I was an obsessive reader, writer, and daydreamer as a kid - I felt like I got to know authors through their writing, I cried over friendships between fictional characters - and in hindsight I think I did have the same social urge other people have, but for some reason I tried to fulfill it in a distant and imaginary way through stories, while rejecting the real people all around me.
I've always thought people were made for love, but I'm getting so tired of leaving the house and interacting with them. I can see so much in them that would be incredibly lovable if I could just be invisible and observe them, like a reader observing characters in a book. But they talk to me and I have to figure out a response in real time, and with all the noise and my hearing problems and stress and tiredness (but I'm only 25 and single with no kids, so I don't know what real stress and tiredness are), I'm two steps away from shutting down. I wish I could just look at my basic job with tunnel-vision and get through the work day asleep. But it eats away at me when I know someone is working with me who wants to talk, when I know I'm not being receptive enough as a listener, when I know my silence is contagious and silence is miserable for most of the people at my workplace. I'm terrible to be around and once I thought so hard about this that I cried in front of people at work, thus making myself even more terrible to be around.
I recently started working with someone who's not a good worker, but was actually fun for me to talk to. She was goofy, smart, upfront about her life and had some things in common with me. I thought this was a potential friend and I came on too strong. Now I'm embarrassed, think maybe she doesn't actually want someone as lame and awkward as me to keep taking the initiative to talk to her, so I've stopped taking the initiative. I even failed completely to acknowledge her several times today (we're working in different areas now but passed each other by several times). But she's mentioned having no friends, she invited me to friend her on Facebook, maybe she will be perceiving this as a potential cool friendship ruined and wonder why I'm doing it, maybe I'm making her hate herself.
I don't want to have to go to work again and either face her or not face her tomorrow. There are several other coworker relationships that make me want to quit when I think about them. There are perfectly good people that I actually like and yet, without wanting to, I keep acting as though I dislike them.
If I hadn't been homeschooled I would have been through all this in middle school and might have a better idea how to handle it. But I spent too much time alone in a house doing nothing, and I want to go back to that. I want to be forgotten by everyone. I hate showing up at work and in society again and having to be forgiven for whatever fuckup I'll make today. I hate hurting people by being there. I hate the selfish worrying about what they think of me, but I can't stop. I really, really badly want people to like me, but they are so exhausting it makes me want to go live in a hut in the woods.

** this is a long rant
We broke up yesterday — after 16 months together and what was both our first relationship (both around 18-19 y/o). I met him online, me in nyc and him in LA. We both got into the same college and our first interaction was nothing but sparks. There was no consideration for looks, background, and what nots. To me, that was the purest form of connection and intent of interest. Fom my daylight to midnights, our hours were full of conversations, flirts, and little did I know, the beginning of love.
After three months of talking, he traveled across the country to meet me and those memories felt like scenes out of a Hollywood movie. Those memories I kept on as we did LDR for the next 5 months until college started. While it was hard, I learned with the time difference and schedule differences, it’s not the quantity of time you spend with each other but if the person on the other end is worth waiting for. I waited.
When college rolled around, he filled his schedule once again with student govt campaigns, clubs, and networking events (we go to a highly competitive school). I waited. I gave him my all (my firsts of everything) and we went on dates here and there but it felt nothing of what he promised: the quinesstenial college romance of holding hands down campus, studying in the library, watching the first autumn leaves fall. I asked why we can’t do all of this and he told me he’s busy and that there’s that insecurity in him to show personal life in public. I empathsized as his touch and his care behind the door meant more that what was displayed. So I became accustomed to waiting.
During winter, I reflected on our relationship: the imbalances of love. I asked am I receving as much as I’m giving? My love langauge is acts of service and physical touch. His, as I came to conclude, is quite rare. Because of his ambition, time is his most valuable asset — no matter how busy he is, he always makes time to spend time with me. I know that he loves me because he’s a person who puts up a strong front, a big smile, and what seems to be never-ending energy, but when he’s with me, he’s able to let it go. Like a bird who everyone sees soaring but only I can see when he’s down, with his wing tucked, and defenseless. I came to treasure this trust between us and proud of how deeply connected we became from just talking through a screen to be spending arm and limb next to each other.
-Yet, I couldn’t heal him. No matter how hard I’ve tried, he feels as if he lost himself in with the amount of things he’s trying to accomplish in college and as he tries to find his passion to pursue. Because we only spend nights together in the comfort of my room when both of us are tired from the day’s schedules, that old spark of never-ending conversations of random topics disappeared. For him, he enjoys my company but sometimes he feels as if this relationship felt like an obligation. Because I spent so much time invested to him, I also lost sight of who I was coming into college, full of aspirations to do and explore.
We talked about this issue, and I told him, yes we need to redirect our focus but it doesn’t have to mean the chopping board. As students, the most and least I can give is my time for when he needs support and comfort. I want to be with him along this journey and come out into real adulthood with memories and success to share. But as the stubborn soul he is, he reaffirms that he doesn’t want us to cling on and salvage the bare minimum. he told me, “if I have a chance at loving you again after college, I will fall even harder.”
This love was becoming cancerous. From one day to the next, our love catching closer to the end depsite our souls becoming more saturated with depth. Why can’t love be everlasting like the fairytales promised.
I miss him so much and I don’t know how I should treat him. should i wait for him until we’re ready? what are the boundaries of us? we both agreed to continue to talk because we care and support each other but will he still be soft and gentle to me because he loves me but we’re not in a relationship? will he wait for us?

Hello all.
I purchased some black satin gloves for a bargain, but the unfortunate thing is that several of the fingers are too large. I have tried the following method to practice on other pairs of gloves that I do not care about, but it does not seem to work, and I cannot find any tutorials on the internet. What I do is turn the glove inside out and trace around my finger with fabric marker. Then I hand backstitch around the lines that I traced, cut off the excess fabric and turn the glove back right side out. This does not seem to work, and I cannot think of another method. I don't want to pay to get them altered, as that would defeat the purpose of buying at a bargain price. Any advice?
Thank you in advance for any helpful tips or links to tutorials that I have managed to overlook.

Howdy. I am officer M (only M, privacy reasons, could lose my job if I was exposed). I’ve been investigating these three cases for the past few years, and I wanted to see if anyone had any clue how to solve them.
I normally wouldn’t go to places like Reddit for this, but I’m desperate. Everyone else I’ve tried has said that this is some kind of webseries project thing. It isn’t.
I’m gonna show you the transcriptions of three sets of video tapes. The first set is from James Barlowe, the second from Daren Redd, and the third from Nick Robin.
Well, I’d better get on with it.
[- - -]
There’s only one tape in this section. It begins with a man in a priest’s uniform (identified as James Barlowe) in the driver’s seat of a car. The person holding the camera is in the passenger’s side.
CAMERAMAN (LATER IDENTIFIED AS NICK ROBIN): “So! What’re we doing, James?”
JAMES: “Oh, uhm, we’re going to a haunted house to perform an exorcism.”
NICK: “Hell yeah we are!”
Nick turns the camera towards his face.
NICK: “Someone tipped us off on a haunted house recently, so we’re gonna go check it out. And James is gonna use his cool priest powers or whatever to get rid of the ghosts! Right James?”
The camera pans to James.
JAMES: “Ah- Yeah.”
The camera turns back to Nick.
NICK: “Now, I’m not gonna be in this one too much, since James is gonna be doing his stuff on his own.”
JAMES: “Wait what?”
The tape cuts off here, and picks back up with James holding the camera. He’s in front of a run-down, abandoned house. He seems nervous, fidgeting with the stole around his neck.
JAMES: “Okay, so, uhm. I am Father Barlowe, and, uhm..I kind of thought Nick was gonna be here. He- He told me he was gonna be here. I dunno. Uhm. Today I’m going to exorcise this ghost. I, uh, don’t know if I’m allowed to do that anymore. But I know how.”
James turns the camera around, and starts to walk into the house. The front door opens into a hallway, which leads to a living room. The camera shakes as James fumbles with his pockets, then brings out a cross. He holds it out in front of him.
JAMES: “Uhm, if there are any ghosts here, show yourself.”
Nothing happens. James mutters something about editing. He waves the cross around dramatically.
JAMES: “Ghost, or demon, or whatever you are, please come and-”
A loud bang comes from somewhere within the house. James seems to flinch. He can be heard heavily breathing as he turns the camera towards the sound.
JAMES: “Uhm..Okay. That’s okay. I’ve got a cross. I’m okay.”
James begins to walk down the hall, where the sound was heard. The camera is shaking, and James is holding out his cross.
JAMES: “Okay, uhm- I think..I think the ghost is in there.”
James points to the doorway at the end of the corridor, then advances towards it. He walks through, and into what appears to be a study. There is a desk and chair in the corner. The chair has a pitch-black figure in it.
JAMES: “Oh god, okay, uhm- Okay. Okay. Uhm. Uh- Demon!”
The figure turns to face James. He holds out his cross with a trembling hand.
JAMES: “Foul creature, begone from this home-”
The figure stands up and begins to walk towards James. The camera is dropped.
JAMES: “Oh God, oh God!”
James can be heard running away.
[- - -]
This first tape is very intriguing to me. The figure has not been identified. At least, not as anyone in the town.
I interviewed both Nick Robin and James Barlowe (they had not gone missing after this video. quite the contrary, in fact. James Barlowe is the one that brought the video to police), and they revealed that most of the content in their videos was fake.
They said that the events of the video were not planned.
[- - -]
The camera appears to be moved around a bit, before setting up to show a man in a red hoodie (identified as Daren Redd) sitting in an office chair. It can be assumed that he’s at his desk. He smiles at the camera.
DAREN: “Uh- Hi. This feels weird, haha. I don’t think I should introduce myself? I don’t know. No one but me’s gonna see this anyways. Unless I make, like, a giant scientific discovery. Or break a world record.”
Daren fidgets with the strings of his hoodie, twirling one between his fingers.
DAREN: “So. My sleep schedule sucks. I’ve been trying to fix it for weeks now, it isn’t working. I’ve decided, fuck it, I’m just gonna roll with it. So! I’m gonna try and stay up for 12 days straight.”
Daren grabs the camera, and shows a calendar up on the wall. The month and year are cut off. Two days are circled (Tuesday, then the next Saturday).
DAREN: “I’ve got a calendar here so that I can figure out how long I’ve been up. If I do more physical stuff, maybe I’ll stay up longer! Haha.”
The camera pans back to Daren.
DAREN: “I’ve got my room-mate watching over me. He’s actually in here right now- Say hi, Nick!”
(PRESUMABLY) NICK, IN THE BACKGROUND: “Hey.”
DAREN: “I rested up real good to prepare for this, so I’m hoping that my plan works. So, uh..Yeah. D-Man out.”
The next tape starts out with Daren holding the camera up to Nick Robin.
DAREN: “Niiiiiiiick.”
NICK: “Why are you recording me?”
DAREN: “Nick how long have I been awake?”
NICK: “Since yesterday, I think.”
Daren flips the camera around to face him. He has a large grin on his face.
DAREN: “That’s right, baby! D-Man has been awake for one whole day! Well- Two? One? Since Tuesday. It’s, uh, Wednesday.”
Daren shows the calendar to the camera. Tuesday is crossed off.
DAREN: “So far, nothing weird has happened yet. I’m tired, but I’ve been drinking a ton of Monster.”
The camera pans to a trash can, with several cans of Monster in it.
DAREN: “So! I should be able to stay up as long as I need. World record, here I come!”
The third tape begins with Daren dragging a trash bag outside.
DAREN: “Ok so I forgot to record a tape today, and I know that if I don’t do it now I’m gonna forget again. But, uhm, I’ve been up for..Uh..I dunno. Time is a concept, anyways. It’s Thursday now, though!”
Daren heaves the trash bag into a can. He walks back inside, and sighs with relief as he enters.
DAREN: “Whew, I love air conditioning.”
NICK (IN THE BACKGROUND): “Dude- Why don’t you take your hoodie off?”
DAREN: “Ah, y’know.”
NICK: “I really don’t.”
DAREN: “See, you get it!”
Daren chuckles and brings the camera into his room. He sets it down on his desk, and sits down in the office chair. He has bags under his eyes, and his hair looks messier than usual.
DAREN: “So. Recently, I’ve been tired. Like, horridly tired. To the point where even sitting down is a..” Yawn. “Risky move for me. But, working from home is keeping me on my toes. Who knew that writing reports could be so exhilerating!”
He looks over his shoulder for a moment, before turning back to the camera. His eyes appear wide and frightened, but he’s still smiling.
DAREN: “Uh, pro tip, maybe don’t try this stuff! I’m stupid enough to try and get a world record, but you, uh, shouldn’t be. Anyways, uhm, D-Man out.”
The fourth tape shows Daren in the hospital, sitting next to Nick, who is in a bed with an IV in his arm. Daren’s eye bags have gotten worse.
DAREN: “Hey, uhm. I don’t know if I’m supposed to record in here. I had to drive Nick to the hospital- He had a dairy allergy thing.”
NICK: “I said he could record in here, don’t worry.”
DAREN: “Yea, he- He said I could record this. I think I’m gonna stay the night here- People do that at hospitals, right? But, uh, they don’t need a bed for me. Because I’m not sleeping! I’m just gonna, uh, play on my phone for the night.”
Daren looks over his shoulder, before turning back to the camera.
DAREN: “Well! It’s Friday now. Been, uh, four days, I think? Yeah. I’ve been awake for four whole days! Well, uhm, this is more filler than anything. Nothing to note. D-Man out.”
The fifth tape is corrupted. Nothing is salvageable.
The sixth tape begins with Daren sitting at his desk. He looks tired beyond comprehension. His knee is bouncing, and he’s tapping his fingers on the table.
DAREN: “Uh, day..Six. I think. It’s Sunday now. The Lord’s day, ha-ha! I’m- I’m not religious. But, uhm, I know one of Nick’s friends is. James something. Maybe I should call that guy. I-”
Daren cuts himself off by looking over his shoulder. He looks back. His eyes are wild and terrified.
DAREN: “I think this was a bad idea. A horrible idea. I- I tried to sleep yesterday. But I couldn’t. I can’t- I can’t close my eyes for too long. Uhm..Nick has been in the hospital since Friday. He’s- He should be back by now. His visits never take this long.”
Daren chuckles. His voice sounds nervous.
DAREN: “He should be back soon, though, right? Right. He’s just taking a bit longer than usual. Uhm, Darry out.”
The seventh tape shows Daren sitting under his desk. He sets up the camera and brings his knees to his chest.
DAREN: “Nick came back today. He, uhm. He’s acting different. I was- I was talking to him, and he, uhm. He forgot he had a dairy allergy. He just..Forgot. I reminded him and he went- He went, oh, yeah. Like he didn’t go to the hospital for it a couple days ago.”
Daren appears to be trembling. He pulls his hood over his head.
DAREN: “..Been awake for seven days, ha-ha. So close! Just, uhm..Five? Four? Something around that. That many days left. I don’t- I don’t wanna do this. But I think I have to. I think it’ll leave me alone if I..”
Daren looks up at something offscreen, and screams.
[- - -]
Daren Redd went missing after this video. I’ve been looking for him for years. I’m trying to stay professional here, but I really don’t know what’s going on. I still sometimes try to figure out what he was looking at in the last tape. But there’s no reflection in his eyes- No shadows anywhere. Nothing. Could he be hallucinating?
I don’t think he is. I think he’s seeing things, sure, but they’re real. They have to be real.
[- - -]
This last section begins with Nick Robin in a car. He’s driving this time, with the camera on the dashboard. James is in the passenger seat. There’s camping gear and a few bags in the back seats.
NICK: “Hey! Welcome back to the PDC (later identified as Paranormal Discovery Channel, the youtube account that both Nick Robin and James Barlowe share), today we’re gonna be exploring a whole abandoned town! It’s called, uh..What was it called again?”
JAMES: “Sasbol heights.”
NICK: “Right, right. Sasbol heights or whatever. Anyways! It’s gonna be cool. Oh- There it is! Dude dude dude- Look!”
The camera points to a charred-looking town. Maybe burnt down?
NICK: “We’re gonna get settled, then get back to all of you. I’ll see y’all soon!”
The next tape begins with Nick sitting in a tent.
NICK: “So! It’s been, like, a day. The first night was pretty underwhelming- Just some creepy old town with bugs and stuff. Nothing too special. Just a bigger version of a haunted house.”
Nick looks off screen- Presumably at James. Nick chuckles.
NICK: “James is sleeping right now. Apparently he’s been having nightmares? That’s, uh, pretty normal for him, though. Oh! Today I started setting up the ghost hunting stuff. Unpacking, putting up cameras, all that jazz.”
There’s shuffling from behind the camera. Nick smiles at (assumedly) James, and winks at the camera.
The third tape starts with Nick and James going into one of the abandoned houses. Nick seems much more enthusiastic than James.
JAMES: “We’re gonna put a voice-over on this, right?”
NICK: “Yea, yea. Something something, abandoned house, something something.”
JAMES: “Good, good, uhm..Nick, man, you know I like doing this and all..But I don’t think I like this episode. It’s like- It feels wrong, y’know?”
NICK: “Mm..You’re right, you’re right. But hey! Think of the money we’ll get from this. Our reactions are gonna be authentic and shit. Plus, we’ve only got a day left.”
Nick pats James’ back, and James smiles.
JAMES: “Right. You’re right.”
The fourth tape is corrupted.
The fifth tape doesn’t include James or Nick’s face, but we can assume who is talking.
NICK: “Listen, man, it- It just got corrupted. It’s fine, right? It’s cool. We can redo it-”
JAMES: “I’m fucking serious, Nick! This isn’t normal! None of the shit we saw yesterday was planned!”
NICK: “I know, I know, but come on man! I need this money!”
JAMES: “Money isn’t worth it, at this point. Please, God, let’s just leave.”
NICK: “If you wanna leave, just go! I can do the video without you.”
JAMES: “I’m not just leaving you with these demons!”
Both Nick and James are quiet for a while. Nick silently walks back to the tent, bringing the camera with him.
The sixth tape is shot from within Nick’s car. Nick is driving, the camera is on the dashboard. He seems terrified.
NICK: “I’m not publishing this. I’m keeping this for myself, and- I don’t know! The police, probably! Jesus Christ- I’m fucking speeding. Are there even road laws here?”
Nick looks at his gas tank, seeing the needle nearing the E. He begins to tear up.
NICK: “Fuck- Uhm. What happened. James tried to kill me, and- And I don’t think he’s James anymore. I really don’t. He’s- He’s not that guy I went to high school with. There’s actually no way.”
He looks at the camera briefly, doing a quick double take.
NICK: “What- No. No. No- Goddammit! Leave me alone!”
The car swerves, and the camera topples over.
[- - -]
I’ve been thinking about these cases since I found them. The actual police department doesn’t know about them- And I haven’t told my superior about them. These tapes just kind of appeared at my doorstep one day, along with a camera.
I looked at the camera’s film, and found three images.
The first one is a picture from the first set of tapes. It seems edited, though. James has a halo.
The second one is from the second set. It shows an image of Daren, with some kind of pitch-black figure behind him.
The third one is, supposedly, from the third set. Though nothing like it is seen anywhere in the tapes. It’s an image taken from the driver’s seat of Nick’s car, showing the camera from the video on the dashboard. On the screen of the camera is Nick. The image is edited to show a car tire over Nick’s face.
If anyone knows anything about James Barlowe, Daren Redd, or Nick Robin, please tell me at [xxxxxxxxxxxxxx]@gmail.com.

Just out of The Strangers: Chapter 1, and I either need validation/vindication, or to be convinced that I'm wrong (and I'm open to that, by all means).

I'd avoided delving too deep into any backstory of this film. Initially I'd thought this was going to be a prequel-series of films, given how Prey at Night ended (two killers dead, one almost certainly dead). So I went in with my back up, as you always should with a horror prequel, or indeed series - what's the actual risk to the villains if they'll allegedly appear in the future (be that the in-universe future, or a future film)?
Within the first few minutes, our lead lady is using a smartphone/Google Maps, and shortly thereafter an AirBNB is mentioned. So we're in present-day, and it's not a prequel - that's fine.
Once we meet The Strangers, The Man in the Mask showed no burns or signs of injury from the previous film, and is wearing significantly different clothing than he usually would. Pin Up Girl and Dollface were hella dead by the end of that film. With all of this said, I'm to believe we have a new trio of killers donning the masks, right? Great.
And yet, it all felt wasted. Nothing new, nothing interesting happened.
Our lead characters were not especially likeable. The dialogue in the car was pretty forced and expository, and they just felt very generic. They looked great and I've no problem with the actors, but feel they weren't given much to do.
In fact, nobody is very likeable in this film. The okayest-character was the girl in the diner who gave them a lift to the house, and even that was probably part of the killers' setup.
Everyone in town... was just downright awful, for no apparent reason. Sneering because the central couple come from the city. Literally making multiple "Huh, she's a VEGETARIAN?" jokes - seriously, was this film written in 2002 and mildly modernized, or something? What the hell are we doing here?!
Our lead characters were also just not smart. Examples:

• Maya is alone in the house. A stranger has come knocking (twice), refusing to elaborate on their intentions. She smokes a joint and takes a shower to relax, while still alone. The power is cut, she meets an unknown individual in the hallway, and runs upstairs to hide in a closet. Then, because she smoked the joint, Ryan convinces her she may have imagined it. She also leaves her phone down (I honestly don't remember what became of it after she asks "Where the fuck is mine?").
• Ryan shoots the goddamn owner of the house, not caring that he wasn't wearing a mask - pointless callback to the first film where the lead man accidentally shoots his friend, btw - and then doesn't shoot Pin-Up girl in the forest when he has her at point-blank range. Why do people never shoot people in the feet/knees? They (probably) won't die, and they'll know you're not fucking around. But no, plenty of time for a dude to come knock you out with the butt of an axe.
• The truck-ramming scene was incredibly forced, and annoyingly danced around dad-truck-murder scene in Prey at Night. Both characters sucked here (he checked the front and back seats, but not the very back of the jeep - I was surprised they didn't have one of the killers climb over the seats).

As I watched, I thought "Okay, chill - it's not as if they know they're in a horror movie. People get jittery and make mistakes when under duress". But I think nowadays, horror movies in general have just surpassed this kinda stuff. They don't - shouldn't - get a free pass for characters being outright stupid, just to make plot happen. Especially when they're the ONLY characters we're following for the whole film. If you wanna introduce a dopey hyuck friend for some death fodder, go right ahead. But it's asking a bit too much nowadays to root for a character who makes stupid choices for just no good reason.
I'm no expert, but I do love my horror movies, and after the direction Prey at Night took, I just expected... more. This was very much a paint-by-numbers horror movie, and it really did come off as a weak copy of the first film. The fact that Maya survives was.. something different. But now it means we'll be following her through the next film. I find this more worrying than interesting, because it may mean there's going to be some contrived revenge plot, when really I want to see more of the killers, and I want to see them get killed.
There are just few things more frustrating than a film series providing more questions and no answers, all in the name of cranking out more of them. All we know - all we can suppose - is that there are three new people wearing these masks. That's all. And for the third film in a franchise - whether it's starting its own story arc or not - that's not good enough for me.

I was driving back home with my mother after getting groceries from the local Walmart. We live in an apartment complex so we normally park our car inside of the multi story parking garage provided. On this particular day I decided to go for a parking which had a car on either side.
I tried to enter the parking space forward but both cars were really close to the white line so I ended up being really close to hitting the car on the right on the way in. Personally, I thought I was in the clear but my mom thought I was going to hit the car.
This argument caused me to offer to go outside of the car and check because I was pretty certain that I was safe. I opened the door and walked around the car to the right side and along the way I saw a guy in a car watching me. I didn’t think anything of it and continue to make my way to the other side. Once I get there, I see that I would have in fact hit the other car if I went along the path I would’ve taken originally.
Before I return back to correct my mistake I notice something. The car on my right already has an injury and coincidentally, right where I would have hit it. I go back to the driving seat and proceed to properly park the car while I think about the chances of that happening.
Once we get out of the car and head to the connecting door to the apartment, I notice the man in the car has a shocked look and that he also started to take photos. That’s when I realized how suspicious that all looked. He came out of his car and told me that I can’t just hit a car and walk away. I then explain to him that I actually didn’t hit the car because the front of my car is intact. Luckily, he believes me.
TL;DR: Looking at a car to check if you were going to hit may cause people to believe you actually did.

Contemplated a lot before posting this but couldn't sleep tonight. I've been dating this guy since end of March. He was my senior in school and we connected earlier this year. The first two weeks were pure bliss but now that I think of it, it could be a case of love bombing initially. Around second week of April he got an internship and it demands most of his time. Even though the working hours are just about 9-10 hours a day, he's almost busy for about 15 hours inclusive of travelling. The problem is he does not text me while he's working or even travelling. Things have been so worse since past 6 weeks that we've not met even when he lives close. We barely talk, he's usually tired when he comes home. The chatbox is solely me yapping, sending 20 texts a day and getting a single dry ass reply at the end of the day, for the same cycle to repeat the next day. Somehow he is caught up on weekends too, more than weekdays. We barely call each other at this point, like once every 4-5 days. And this has been the case since mid April. I understand that monotony and individual schedules are common in relationships but just after 2 weeks of dating? All of this is taking a toll on my grades, my appetite and my sleep. I'm in the middle of my exams yet I can not seem to focus on the one thing I'm good at, academics. I think I'm to be blamed for being so obsessed but I do not know how to love less. He takes good 8 hours to reply yet I'm quick to respond within a couple of seconds. I'm always waiting for a text with my notifications on, in hopes that we'd get to talk. It is disrespectful to chase and beg in front of a man who is supposed to calm my nerves and reassure me instead of making things worse. I've brought it up a few times but he just apologizes, calls himself a terrible person and promises to change. I feel disrespected and humiliated when I have to wait endlessly for days at a stretch yet I'm always there for him at the snap of his fingers. A lot has been happening and I've got to deal with all of it alone, when I could just seek comfort from somebody I so desperately need. It's just, the words and actions are so disrespectful that nothing can make me feel respected in this relationship again. Nothing he could do would make me forgive him. I do not know if I should just start ignoring him like he does or if I should end it...

Hi, like the title says, I'm going to be moving about 7 hours away soon, and I'm worried about how my elderly cat will take it. He's at least 17 years old, but we think he's closer to 19 or 20 years old. He absolutely hates driving and the last time we moved with him, he complained the entire time in the car, and then hid under the bed for a month.
I know this is an event that will stress him out very much, and I'm a little worried of giving my sweet boy a heart attack, or stress him out enough that he'll never be comfortable in the new place until he gets more and more sick until he dies. I'm only a little nervous, as you can see /j
I am looking for recommendations for things I could do that would make this trip a lot less stressful for my little old-man cat. We have a traveling carrier that he will be traveling in, and he's going to be in the front passenger seat. I already plan on putting a blanket over his carrier to keep it dim for him as well.
But any other things that could help prepare him for this move, feel more relaxed during the drive, or help him acclimate comfortably afterwards, I would really appreciate.
Thanks y'all!

I made a post in Mommit about an interaction I had with my MiL at my baby shower that resulted in her in tears and my husband and I arguing over how I can and cannot speak to her. Someone recommended this sub, but I didn’t think it was necessary. That is, until more of this situation played out.
TL;DR of the first post: my MiL derailed our baby shower by insisting we open her gift when we didn’t plan to open gifts, trying to snatch the gift from my toddler after I’d given it to her, and trying to control how we opened the gift and who was looking at that precise moment. My husband was letting this happen, and I lashed out by saying that the spectators to this gift opening were not having a baby! She burst into tears and everyone left.
So my husband felt that I jumped down her throat and embarrassed her unfairly. I cracked under that, and I sent her an apology under the condition that I could also air my frustrations to her directly. Here was that message:
“Hi MiL, I’m hoping to talk to you about yesterday. I understand that my comments made you feel hurt and embarrassed. I don’t want to make you feel that way, and I understand that my comments were rude. At the same time, I felt very frustrated in that moment and I wish that you would have respected our plan to wait to open gifts until after our guests had left the party. I also felt it was not ok to take the gift back from DD— I chose to include her for a reason, and it felt like you weren’t respecting that as well. Everyone would have seen the gift in their own time and been able to appreciate it just as well, whether they saw the paper coming off or saw it right after. But it was very overwhelming and frustrating to be told how and when to open the gift. To me, that is not a nice way to receive a gift, and it upset me a lot. In the future, if you have a very specific vision for how everyone should do something, then I think it would be better for you to work with DH on it rather than me. I’m telling you this not to excuse my comments, but to try to be open with you about how I was feeling at the time and why I got upset. My choice to say what I said was not the right response, and I should have waited to air my frustrations at a more appropriate time, and I’m sorry for that.”
Then, her response. It’s honestly so long and rambling that I don’t think y’all would care to read it. But she takes no responsibility for her side of it, telling me she couldn’t have been disrespectful because 1) she didn’t know that we didn’t plan to open gifts (even though I told her ??) and 2) she didn’t know the reason I included DD in opening the gifts (this makes no sense). But that I was extremely rude and she deserves respect because she would never have spoken to her in-laws like that. That’s when I lost it. I sent this:
“You found out that we were not opening gifts, when I told you that we are not opening gifts. And then you refused to respect that. You pushed for us to do it for you anyways, at an inappropriate time. That was you not respecting my choice.
I handed the present to DD, that was my choice. You tried to snatch it back from her. That was you not respecting my choice. There should be nothing confusing about that. A mature adult also does not snatch a present from a child in that manner.
I assumed you were hurt by my comment because you burst into tears in front of the entire party. So either you were hurt, or the tears were for show. You tell me which. [She insisted that she was not hurt by my comments lol]
Respect is a mutual endeavor, so let me be very clear: You do not get to act the way you did (and often do) in my home and around my children, and get respect from me. I always give you the same amount of respect that I am receiving from you, and that will continue.
There were many ways for you to respectfully approach presenting that gift, and you chose not to do that. If you can’t figure that out, that’s on you. You are the only person in our lives who seems to have trouble with this sort of thing. Any further communication should be done through DH, that is all I have to say.”
I am feeling very upset and my husband is angry with me and I just need encouragement that it’s ok for me to stand my ground in this way. Or criticism if that is due. If you’re interested in reading her message in between I can post it in a comment, this post is just incredibly long already.

No, really, not a shitpost. In a sense, because of the way GMs are all about the saves, he determined, before this year, that he would restrict his own usage.
The story notes that, earlier this year, he had his first multi-inning appearance since 2019. Here's the info and intro on that:

Hader, one of the greatest relievers of his era, had spent the previous four years working under unprecedented, self-imposed usage rules to keep himself healthy. Together with his agent, Jeff Berry, Hader became the first known relief pitcher to place such restrictions on himself.

Why?

That remained Hader's stance until a team was willing to make him a long-term commitment, a process that extended until late January, when the Astros signed Hader to a five-year, $95 million deal. It is the first multiyear deal of Hader's career. ...
Hader lost his arbitration hearing in 2019 and went unsigned for months this winter. ...
Hader got 12 saves in 2018, and then in 2019, he continued to pitch as the Brewers' closer, picking up 37 saves; he worked more than three outs in 15 of those 37 saves. The Brewers were using him like a Swiss Army knife, Berry recalled, and the lefty was thriving. ...
The following winter, Hader was eligible for salary arbitration for the first time. What he had done on the mound was largely unprecedented, but Berry, needing a comparable performance in history, cited Jonathan Papelbon's one-year, $6.25 million deal as a closer with the Boston Red Sox in 2009. Berry asked for $6.4 million in arbitration for Hader. The Brewers offered $4.1 million.
The day before the hearing, [assistant general manager David] Stearns and Berry spoke, and Stearns made a two-year offer over speakerphone. Though Berry doesn't remember the exact proposal, he said it did not reflect Hader's standing as an elite reliever. ...
When the arbitration hearing began, Berry made his case, pointing to Hader's historic performance. The lawyers working on behalf of the Brewers and MLB's labor relations department -- which typically drives arbitration recommendations to the teams, with the team carrying the right to act on its own -- focused on the saves, in spite of how Milwaukee deployed Hader.

And so, Berry gets an idea. And pitches it to Hader.
If the Brewers were going to fight the All-Star over his salary, then they would design rules to protect him. Berry had never heard of another pitcher dictating his own usage, but he also had never had a pitcher used as Hader had been. Berry proposed three new rules for Hader to present to the front office: He would not pitch more than two days in a row; he would not pitch more than three outs; he would pitch only in a save situation or when the score was tied.
And, Hader said yes. (And, with the Brewers, had Counsell's full support. And, at least silent acceptance from the Padres.)
Of course, the Astros signed him to a multiyear deal. And that gets us back to the start.

Berry asked Hader how he could be used by the Astros.
"Any way they want," Hader said. "They made a commitment to me, and I'll make a commitment to them."

There we are. Lots more, lots more, at the link, but it needed a lot of framing.

Some people will throw out the "It's part of the game, get over it!" or that it is "the way the game is meant to be played" (it isn't as devs literally attempted to work against it since the start of OW2 publicly). But this game just is not fun to play in this state, especially as a tank player. Every death, every fight, every time a tank spawns again, there is a requirement to counterpick or you are essentially throwing and everyone refers to it as an annoying and tedious game of rock paper scissors. Even just being outright better and playing with better positioning, cooldown usage, etc. you just get rolled by the other tank existing as the nature of that counterpick tank. It is genuinely mentally taxing to win a single fight and hold tab just to see the whole enemy team drop any plans of playing better next time and see a lineup of a counter tank, reaper, bastion, and whatever else to initiate the game of ping pong we all know and hate.
Not to mention in the start of games this literally makes it complete chance on the outcome of a fight, this was seen on a smaller scale a while back with the release of brig, where even if a GM tracer is playing a diamond brig, you are essentially throwing as the game becomes effectively unplayable as tracer. People make no effort to think about how to play better or genuinely out-strategize the other team, they just do the same counterpick BS over and over because that and that alone is how they can win. The vast majority of overwatch players have voiced their hate for this state of overwatch, yet it seems like blizzard wants to put up the blindfold and plug their ears while they lead the game back into the pit of unfun trash that overwatch 1 fell into.
I would genuinely rather play non-stop hanumura 2CP over and over than this version of overwatch and I know many people share my displeasure.