A rose for facebook

Emily Ratajkowski

2012.09.06 03:30 VeryTallDog Emily Ratajkowski

Reddit's arrogance in all but ignoring the mods needs has resulted in only harming our users. This sub went dark due to the terrible handling of Reddit's API pricing changes and policy decisions. /Save3rdPartyApps/. Under duress and for the benefit of our users, we are reopening the Subreddit despite this issue not being resolved.
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2015.03.26 19:06 SeanNoxious React Native - Learn once, write anywhere.

A community for learning and developing native mobile applications using React Native by Facebook.
[link]

2014.09.17 14:48 Tooni_Warri The Best Arduino Projects!

Arduino Projects is a subreddit dedicated to showcasing new and interesting projects.
[link]

2024.05.28 00:43 healthmedicinet Health Daily News May 26 2024

DAY: MAY 26 2024
5-26-2024

AI CHATBOTS ARE INTRUDING INTO ONLINE COMMUNITIES WHERE PEOPLE ARE TRYING TO CONNECT WITH OTHER HUMANS

A parent asked a question in a private Facebook group in April 2024: Does anyone with a child who is both gifted and disabled have any experience with New York City public schools? The parent received a seemingly helpful answer that laid out some characteristics of a specific school, beginning with the context that “I have a child who is also 2e,” meaning twice exceptional. On a Facebook group for swapping unwanted items near Boston, a user looking for specific items received an offer of a “gently used” Canon camera
5-26-2024

MICROSOFT’S AI CHATBOT WILL ‘RECALL’ EVERYTHING YOU DO ON A PC

Microsoft wants laptop users to get so comfortable with its artificial intelligence chatbot that it will remember everything you’re doing on your computer and help figure out what you want to do next. The software giant on Monday revealed a new class of AI-imbued personal
5-26-2024

AI RELIES ON MASS SURVEILLANCE, WARNS SIGNAL BOSS

The AI tools that crunch numbers, generate text and videos and find patterns in data rely on mass surveillance and exercise concerning control over our lives, the boss of encrypted messaging app Signal told AFP on Thursday. Pushing back against the unquestioning enthusiasm at VivaTech in Paris, Europe’s top startup conference where industry players vaunt the merits of their products, Meredith Whittaker said concerns about surveillance and those about AI were “two framings
5-26-2024

THE ‘DEAD INTERNET THEORY’ MAKES EERIE CLAIMS ABOUT AN AI-RUN WEB. THE TRUTH IS MORE SINISTER

An example of a shrimp Jesus image on Facebook with no caption or context information included in the post. Credit: Facebook If you search “shrimp Jesus” on Facebook, you might encounter dozens of images of artificial intelligence (AI) generated crustaceans meshed in various forms with a stereotypical image of Jesus Christ. Some of these hyper-realistic images have garnered more than 20,000 likes and comments. So what exactly is going on here? The “dead internet theory” has an explanation: AI and bot-generated content has surpassed the human-generated internet. But where did
5-26-2024

WHAT ARE DEEPFAKES AND SHOULD WE BE WORRIED?

Deepfakes are creating havoc across the globe, spreading fake news and pornography, being used to steal identities, exploiting celebrities, scamming ordinary people and even influencing elections. Yet a worldwide survey found 71% of people have no idea what deepfakes are. Deepfakes are digital photos, videos or voices of real people that have either been synthetically created or manipulated using artificial intelligence (AI) and can be hard to distinguish from the real thing. You’ve probably seen a deepfake video or photo without even realizing it. Computer-generated Tom Cruises,
5-26-2024

META INTRODUCES CHAMELEON, AN EARLY-FUSION MULTIMODAL MODEL

Chameleon represents all modalities—images, text, and code, as discrete tokens and uses a uniform transformer-based architecture that is trained from scratch in an end-to-end fashion on ?10T tokens of interleaved mixed-modal data. As a result, Chameleon can both reason over, as well as generate, arbitrary mixed-modal documents. Text tokens are represented in green and image tokens are represented in blue. AI researchers at Meta, the company that owns Facebook, Instagram, WhatsApp, and many other products, have designed and built a multimodal model to compete with
5-26-2024

ELECTRIC SCHOOL BUSES MAY YIELD SIGNIFICANT HEALTH AND CLIMATE BENEFITS, COST SAVINGS

Replacing diesel school buses with electric school buses may yield up to $247,600 in climate and health benefits per individual bus, according to a new study by researchers at Harvard T.H. Chan School of Public Health. The researchers found that these benefits—including fewer greenhouse gas emissions and reduced rates of adult mortality and childhood asthma—and their associated savings are strongest in large cities and among fleets of old (2005 and before) buses. The study, “Adopting electric school buses in the United States: health and climate benefits,” was published in the
5-26-2024

WEARABLE DEVICES GET SIGNAL BOOST FROM NEW MATERIAL

Strain-invariant stretchable wireless system enabled by dielectro-elastic composite. A new material that moves like skin while preserving signal strength in electronics could enable the development of next-generation wearable devices with continuous, consistent wireless and battery-free functionality. According to a study published today in Nature, an international team of researchers from Rice University and Hanyang University developed the material by embedding clusters of highly dielectric ceramic nanoparticles into an elastic polymer. The material was reverse-engineered to not only mimic skin elasticity and motion types, but also
5-26-2024

AI DOMINATES ANNUAL PARIS STARTUP EVENT VIVATECH

Vivatech will host more than 150,000 guests, 11,000 startups and 450 speakers over four days. Thousands of tech enthusiasts filed into Europe’s self-declared biggest startup event VivaTech in Paris on Wednesday, with artificial intelligence stealing the show this year. Over four days, the event, now in its eighth year, will host more than 150,000 guests, 11,000 startups and 450 speakers, according to the organizers. The star turns will take to the stage on Thursday—former US climate envoy and secretary of state John Kerry is expected to make a push for
5-26-2024

AI POISED TO USHER IN NEW LEVEL OF CONCIERGE SERVICES TO THE PUBLIC

AI concierge’s fundamental forms. Credit: Journal of Service Management (2024). Concierge services built on artificial intelligence have the potential to improve how hotels and other service businesses interact with customers, a new paper suggests. In the first work to introduce the concept, researchers have outlined the role an AI concierge, a technologically advanced assistant, may play in various areas of the service sector as well as the different forms such a helper might embody. Their paper envisions a virtual caretaker that, by combining natural language processing, behavioral data
5-26-2024

AGE VERIFICATION FOR SOCIAL MEDIA WOULD IMPACT EVERYONE—RESEARCHERS ASK PARENTS AND KIDS IF THEY ACTUALLY WANT IT

by Justine Humphry, Catherine Page Jeffery, Jonathon Hutchinson and Olga Boichak, The Conversation This month the Australian government announced a A$6.5 million commitment to trial an age-verification program that will restrict children’s exposure to inappropriate online content, including pornography and potentially social media. The announcement came out of a National Cabinet meeting geared towards addressing gender-based violence in Australia. Much has been said about age-checking technologies in the weeks since. Experts point out implementing these tools effectively (so they aren’t easily by-passed) will be complicated—and any such system could come
5-26-2024

IS IT SAFE TO FLY? AIRLINE SAFETY EXPERT ON MODERN COMMERCIAL FLIGHT

In light of recent news regarding congressional action on aviation safety, Penn State News spoke with Amy Pritchett, department head of aerospace engineering and professor in Penn State’s College of Engineering. Pritchett previously served as the director of NASA’s Aviation Safety Program and currently chairs the National Academies committee chartered to research and advise federal regulators on emerging trends in aviation safety. In
5-26-2024

USING SMART DEVICES TO SCHEDULE ON-DEMAND PUBLIC TRANSPORTATION CAN SAVE TIME AND MONEY

Suburban residents often face challenges receiving reliable and accessible bus transit—riders often complain about infrequent schedules and long waiting times. Often, transit agencies are unable to provide additional buses because population density in such areas is usually low. On-demand transit (ODT) is an innovative transportation approach that enhances the accessibility and quality of service while reducing operating costs. Despite the rapid growth of ODT services in various cities across Canada and the United States, the mechanism of
5-26-2024

UNDERWATER SIGNALS GENERATED BY OPEN SEA AIRPLANE CRASHES COULD BE KEY TO DETECTING FINAL RESTING PLACE OF MH370

Location of the CTBTO’s hydroacoustic stations H11N and H11S (white triangles); the impact location of three aircrafts (indicated in yellow): F-35a, Transair Flight 810, and Asiana Flight 991; and the distances and bearings relative to the hydroacoustic stations (presented in magenta). The cyan star shows the location of earthquake M 4.8–9 km S of Y?kaichiba, Japan, 2014-03-07 18:34:20 (UTC) 35.611o N 140.552o E 23.9 km depth. Signals captured on underwater microphones could be key to locating airplanes such as MH370 when they crash into
5-26-2024

SURVEY INVESTIGATES AI TECHNOLOGIES IN THE CLASSIFICATION AND CREATION OF ART

A comprehensive survey has looked at the intersection of art and artificial intelligence (AI). The team has focused on how AI technologies are employed in the classification and also the creation of artworks. Andrej Šimi? and Marina Bagi? Babac of the Faculty of Electrical Engineering and Computing at the University of Zagreb have analyzed and categorized a number of research papers in this field to understand the methodologies, techniques, and outcomes in this emerging field. They discuss
5-26-2024

CYBERSECURITY LABELING FOR SMART DEVICES AIMS TO HELP PEOPLE CHOOSE ITEMS LESS LIKELY TO BE HACKED

Smart devices like baby monitors, fitness trackers and internet-connected appliances will soon be eligible for labels certifying that they meet federal cybersecurity standards. Federal officials said Wednesday that the first “Cyber Trust” labels could appear in time for the holiday shopping season. The White House announced the labels last year to help consumers avoid devices that are vulnerable to hacking. Credit: AP Photo/Susan Walsh, File Consumer labels
5-26-2024

WORLD LEADERS STILL NEED TO WAKE UP TO AI RISKS, SAY LEADING EXPERTS AHEAD OF AI SAFETY SUMMIT

Leading AI scientists are calling for stronger action on AI risks from world leaders, warning that progress has been insufficient since the first AI Safety Summit in Bletchley Park six months ago. Then, the world’s leaders pledged to govern AI responsibly. However, as the second AI Safety Summit in Seoul (21–22 May) approaches, 25 of the world’s leading AI scientists say not enough is actually being done to protect us from the technology’s risks. In an expert consensus paper published in Science, they outline urgent policy priorities that global leaders
5-26-2024

MICROSOFT’S AI CHATBOT WILL ‘RECALL’ EVERYTHING YOU DO ON A PC

Microsoft wants laptop users to get so comfortable with its artificial intelligence chatbot that it will remember everything you’re doing on your computer and help figure out what you want to do next. The software giant on Monday revealed a new class of AI-imbued personal
5-26-2024

AI TRAINED TO DRAW INSPIRATION FROM IMAGES, NOT COPY THEM

Powerful new artificial intelligence models sometimes, quite famously, get things wrong—whether hallucinating false information or memorizing others’ work and offering it up as their own. To address the latter, researchers led by a team at The University of Texas at Austin have developed a framework to train AI models on images corrupted beyond recognition. DALL-E, Midjourney and Stable Diffusion are among the text-to-image diffusion generative AI models that can turn arbitrary user text into highly realistic images. All three are now facing lawsuits from artists who
5-26-2024

AI CHIPS COULD GET A SENSE OF TIME WITH MEMRISTOR THAT CAN BE TUNED

Tunable composition and structural disorder in single-crystalline ESO thin films on epitaxial YBCO electrodes. Credit: Nature Electronics (2024). Artificial neural networks may soon be able to process time-dependent information, such as audio and video data, more efficiently. The first memristor with a “relaxation time” that can be tuned is reported today in Nature Electronics, in a study led by the University of Michigan. Memristors, electrical components that store information in their electrical resistance, could reduce AI’s energy needs by about a factor of 90 compared to today’s graphical
5-26-2024

WHAT GOOGLE AI MEANS FOR YOU—AND YOUR SEARCH RESULTS

Google recently unveiled plans to integrate its search engine with artificial intelligence (AI). The company is debuting a new search engine feature called A.I. Overviews, which generates an overview of the topic a user searches and displays links to learn more. Traditional search results still appear underneath, but A.I. Overviews, Google says, will parse various pieces of information to give you a quicker answer. The new feature has raised concerns from some web publishers, who worry it will deal a heavy blow to their site traffic. Currently, A.I. Overviews don’t
5-26-2024

RESEARCHERS ANALYZE THE CHARACTERISTICS OF AI-GENERATED DEEPFAKES

Credit: AI-generated image Most of the deepfakes (videos with fake hyper-realistic recreations) generated by artificial intelligence (AI) that spread through social media feature political representatives and artists and are often linked to current news cycles. This is one of the conclusions of research by the Universidad Carlos III de Madrid (UC3M) that analyzes the formal and content characteristics of viral misinformation in Spain arising from the use of AI tools for illicit purposes. This advance represents a step towards understanding and mitigating the threats generated by hoaxes in our society.
5-26-2024

INTERDISCIPLINARY GROUP SUGGESTS GUIDELINES FOR THE USE OF AI IN SCIENCE

(AI) generates texts, videos and images that can hardly be distinguished from those of humans—with the result that we often no longer know what is real. Researchers and scientists are increasingly being supported by AI. Therefore, an international task force has now developed principles for
5-26-2024

IMPERCEPTIBLE SENSORS MADE FROM ‘ELECTRONIC SPIDER SILK’ CAN BE PRINTED DIRECTLY ON HUMAN SKIN

Researchers have developed a method to make adaptive and eco-friendly sensors that can be directly and imperceptibly printed onto a wide range of biological surfaces, whether that’s a finger or a flower petal. Credit: University of Cambridge Researchers have developed a method to make adaptive and eco-friendly sensors that can be directly and imperceptibly printed onto a wide range of biological surfaces, whether that’s a finger or a flower petal. The method, developed by researchers from the University of Cambridge, takes its inspiration from spider silk, which can conform and
5-26-2024

BREAKTHROUGH OR BOAST? THE QUEST FOR COMPARABLE RESEARCH RESULTS

More international attention is being paid to the importance of common standards for performing scientific experiments and measuring their results—a field called metrology. In late 2019, physicist Dr. Lorenzo Pattelli was part of an Italian-Chinese scientific team working on a cooling technology that is fast gaining attention as the Earth gets hotter from climate change. Called passive daytime radiative cooling, or PDRC, the technology uses engineered materials to reflect away the sun’s radiation. The idea is that, amid heat waves, PDRC panels would cool buildings without the need for energy-intensive
5-26-2024

AI-ENHANCED COLLECTIVE BARGAINING TOOLS COULD HELP GIG WORKERS SOLVE PROBLEMS

Researchers at Northeastern University have created artificial intelligence tools to help gig workers organize, collect their own job-related data, analyze their work problems and come up with a strategy to implement solutions. “Building solid AI-enhanced solutions to enable gig workers’ collective action will pave the way for a fair and ethical gig economy—one with fair wages, humane working conditions and increased job security,” says Saiph Savage, assistant professor and director of the Civic A.I. Lab at Northeastern’s Khoury College of Computer Sciences. Gig work is typically performed by a freelancer
5-26-2024

AI-POWERED TRADING STRATEGIES TAME MARKET SWINGS

Average financial indicators feature importance. Credit: Quantitative Finance and Economics (2024). DOI: 10.3934/QFE.2024007 The dynamic landscape of cryptocurrencies, marked by rapid growth and high volatility since Bitcoin’s inception in 2009, has attracted significant attention from investors and traders. The emergence of new digital currencies challenges traditional financial models, necessitating advanced analytical tools to navigate the market’s unpredictability. The quest for effective trading strategies has led to the exploration of AI and machine learning techniques, which promise to enhance decision-making in this speculative yet lucrative field. Researchers from the University of
5-26-2024

NEW ROBOTIC PALM USES SOPHISTICATED TACTILE SENSORS TO MIMIC HUMAN TOUCH

“I’ll have you eating out of the palm of my hand” is an unlikely utterance you’ll hear from a robot. Why? Most of them don’t have palms. If you have kept up with the protean field, gripping and grasping more like humans has been an ongoing Herculean effort. Now, a new robotic hand design developed in MIT’s Computer Science and Artificial Intelligence Laboratory (CSAIL) has rethought the oft-overlooked
5-26-2024

SCARLETT JOHANSSON SAYS A CHATGPT VOICE IS ‘EERILY SIMILAR’ TO HERS AND OPENAI IS HALTING ITS USE

Scarlett Johansson poses for photographers at the photo call for the film “Asteroid City” at the 76th international film festival, Cannes, southern France, May 24, 2023. OpenAI plans to halt the use of one of its ChatGPT voices after some drew similarities to Johansson, who famously portrayed a fictional AI assistant in the (perhaps no longer so futuristic) film “Her.” File OpenAI on Monday said it plans to halt the use of one of its ChatGPT voices that “Her” actor Scarlett Johansson says sounds
5-26-2024

AI HEADPHONES LET WEARER LISTEN TO A SINGLE PERSON IN A CROWD BY LOOKING AT THEM JUST ONCE

A University of Washington team has developed an artificial intelligence system that lets a user wearing headphones look at a person speaking for three to five seconds and then hear just the enrolled speaker’s voice in real time even as the listener moves around in noisy places and no longer faces the speaker. Pictured is a prototype of the headphone system: binaural microphones attached to off-the-shelf noise canceling headphones. Credit: Kiyomi Taguchi/University of Washington Noise-canceling headphones have gotten very good at creating an auditory blank slate. But allowing certain sounds
5-26-2024

NVIDIA’S PROFIT SOARS, UNDERSCORING ITS DOMINANCE IN CHIPS FOR ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE

Nvidia reports earnings on Wednesday, May 22, 2024. Credit: AP Photo/Eric Risberg Nvidia on Wednesday overshot Wall Street estimates as its profit skyrocketed, bolstered by the chipmaking dominance that has made the company an icon of the artificial intelligence boom. Its net income rose more than sevenfold compared to a year earlier, jumping to $14.88 billion in its first quarter that ended April 28 from $2.04 billion a year earlier. Revenue
5-26-2024

EIT-BASED TACTILE SENSOR PROVIDES NEW APPROACH TO FINE MOTOR SKILLS ASSESSMENT

Researchers from SIT Japan showed a peg-shaped sensor for classifying adult pinching motions. Reconstructed images reach 79.4% accuracy, while voltage vectors achieve 91.4%, hinting at automated finger motion analysis potential. a) The microcontroller and sensing device are connected by a wire. (b) Hand model pinching the sensing device with two fingers from the horizontal direction and the reconstructed image. Credit: Hiroki Sato from SIT, Japan. Fine motor skills play a crucial role in human cognition, influencing everything from daily activities to the development of advanced tool-based civilizations. Yet, quantifying and
5-26-2024

EUROPE’S CLIMATE LAWS COULD SPELL THE END TO LOW-COST FLIGHTS—BUT WHAT ABOUT PRIVATE JETS?

The era of low-cost air travel in Europe may be over for good, thanks in part to recent EU environmental policies. All in all, this is good news for the climate. But many low- and middle-income people who used to travel around the EU will no longer be able to do so, or at least will be able to do so much less often. Yet the same policies will have little or no impact on the use of much more polluting private jets, which typically cover distances served by commercial
5-26-2024

ROBOT-PHOBIA COULD EXASPERATE HOTEL, RESTAURANT LABOR SHORTAGE

Using more robots to close labor gaps in the hospitality industry may backfire and cause more human workers to quit, according to a Washington State University study. The study, involving more than 620 lodging and food service employees, found that “robot-phobia”—specifically the fear that robots and technology will take human jobs—increased workers’ job insecurity and stress, leading to greater intentions to leave their jobs. The impact was more pronounced with employees who had real experience working with robotic technology. It also affected managers in addition to frontline workers. The findings
5-26-2024

TWO TYPES OF LLMS FOUND ABLE TO EQUAL OR OUTPERFORM HUMANS ON THEORY OF MIND TESTS

Performance of human (purple), GPT-4 (dark blue), GPT-3.5 (light blue) and LLaMA2-70B (green) on the battery of theory of mind tests. a, Original test items for each test showing the distribution of test scores for individual sessions and participants. b, Interquartile ranges of the average scores on the original published items (dark colors) and novel items (pale colors) across each test. An international team of psychologists and neurobiologists has found via experimentation that two types of LLMs are able to equal or outperform
5-26-2024

SANOFI ALLIES WITH OPENAI, FORMATION BIO FOR AI USE IN DRUG DEVELOPMENT

AI is playing an ever greater role in developing new medicines, as well as identifying new applications for existing drugs. French pharmaceutical company Sanofi announced Tuesday a partnership with ChatGPT-founder OpenAI and US biotech firm Formation Bio to accelerate the use of artificial intelligence in developing drugs. AI is playing an ever greater role in developing new medicines, as well as identifying new applications for existing drugs. It can be used for example to find new molecules more quickly and to improve clinical tests by vetting which patients would be
5-26-2024

USING AI, MASTERCARD EXPECTS TO FIND COMPROMISED CARDS QUICKER, BEFORE THEY GET USED BY CRIMINALS

A sign indicating MasterCard credit cards are accepted is posted at a New York business, Jan. 21, 2015. Mastercard said Wednesday, May 21, 2024, that it expects to be able to discover that your credit or debit card number has been compromised well before it ends up in the hands of a cybercriminal. Credit: AP Photo/Mark Lennihan, File Mastercard said Wednesday that it expects to be able to discover that your credit or debit card number has been compromised well before it ends up in the hands of a cybercriminal.
5-26-2024

NEW FLEXIBLE FILM DETECTS EYELASH PROXIMITY IN BLINK-TRACKING GLASSES

When attached to eyeglasses, a clear, flexible sensor can detect how close eyelashes are to the lens, enabling blink tracking. When another person’s finger hovers over your skin, you may get the sense that they’re touching you, feeling not necessarily contact, but their proximity. Similarly, researchers reporting in ACS Applied Materials & Interfaces have designed a soft, flexible film that senses the presence of nearby objects without physically touching them. The study features the new sensor technology to detect
5-26-2024

GAMERS SAY THEY HATE ‘SMURFING,’ BUT ADMIT THEY DO IT

Online video game players believe the behavior known as “smurfing” is generally wrong and toxic to the gaming community—but most admit to doing it and say some reasons make the behavior less blameworthy, new research finds. The new study suggests that debates about toxicity in gaming may sometimes be more complex and nuanced than is often acknowledged, according to the researchers. Online video games use what are called “matchmaking systems” to pair players based on skill. “Smurfing” is when players cheat these systems by creating new accounts so that they
5-26-2024

HUMANS BARELY ABLE TO RECOGNIZE AI-GENERATED MEDIA

AI-generated images, texts and audio files are so convincing that people are no longer able to distinguish them from human-generated content. This is the result of an online survey of about 3,000 participants from Germany, China, and the U.S. This is the first time that a large transnational study has examined this particular form of media literacy.
5-26-2024

CAN AIRPLANE TURBULENCE REALLY KILL YOU? AIRCRAFT PROPULSION EXPERT WEIGHS IN ON SINGAPORE AIRLINES DEATH

One person was killed and several dozen more injured Tuesday when a flight from London to Singapore encountered “sudden extreme turbulence” and plummeted roughly 6,000 feet in a matter of minutes, according to The Washington Post. All told, there were 211 passengers and 18 crew on board, according to Singapore Airlines. The deceased passenger reportedly suffered a heart attack during the mid-air tumult. The Boeing 777-300ER operated by Singapore Airlines diverted to Bangkok, where it landed at 3:45 p.m. local time on Tuesday following the in-flight incident. The New York
5-26-2024

HOW INTELLIGENCE AGENCIES’ ARE CAUTIOUSLY EMBRACING GENERATIVE AI

U.S. intelligence agencies are scrambling to embrace the AI revolution, convinced they’ll otherwise be smothered in data as sensor-generated surveillance tech further blankets the planet. They also need to keep pace with competitors, who are already using AI to seed social media platforms with deepfakes. But the tech is young and brittle, and officials are acutely aware that generative AI is anything but tailor-made for a trade steeped in danger and deception. Years before OpenAI’s ChatGPT set off the current generative AI marketing frenzy, U.S. intelligence and defense officials were
5-26-2024

3D PRINTING ROBOT USES AI MACHINE LEARNING TO CREATE A SHOCK-ABSORBING SHAPE NO HUMAN EVER COULD

Inside a lab in Boston University’s College of Engineering, a robot arm drops small, plastic objects into a box placed perfectly on the floor to catch them as they fall. One by one, these tiny structures—feather-light, cylindrical pieces, no bigger than an inch tall—fill the box. Some are red, others blue, purple, green, or black. Each object is the result of an experiment in robot autonomy. On its own, learning as it goes, the robot is searching for, and trying to make, an object with the most
submitted by healthmedicinet to u/healthmedicinet [link] [comments]

2024.05.27 13:45 BFC_Publications How Can I Market My Print-on-Demand Book Effectively?

How Can I Market My Print-on-Demand Book Effectively?
Marketing a print-on-demand book effectively is essential for reaching a wider audience and achieving your sales goals. With the rise of Print-on-Demand Book publishing, authors now have the flexibility to print books only when an order is placed, minimizing upfront costs. However, this model also requires a robust marketing strategy to ensure your book gets noticed. This comprehensive guide explores various strategies and tips to help you market your print-on-demand book successfully.
https://preview.redd.it/sybpdg63iy2d1.png?width=509&format=png&auto=webp&s=8fa5ff5076475dd9af131c64deb3b7eee1cff4df
Understanding Print-on-Demand Book Publishing
Before diving into marketing strategies, it's important to understand the fundamentals of Print-on-Demand (POD) Book publishing. Unlike traditional publishing, where large print runs are required, POD allows you to print a book on demand, reducing inventory and storage costs. This model is particularly beneficial for self-published authors, providing a cost-effective way to bring their books to market.
Developing a Marketing Plan
A well-structured marketing plan is crucial for the success of your print-on-demand book. Here are the key components of an effective marketing plan:
1. Define Your Target Audience
Identifying your target audience is the first step in any marketing plan. Understanding who your readers are will help you tailor your marketing efforts to reach them effectively. Consider factors such as age, gender, interests, and reading habits.
2. Create a Compelling Book Description
A compelling book description can capture the attention of potential readers. Make sure your description is clear, engaging, and highlights the unique aspects of your book. Use relevant keywords to improve searchability.
3. Design an Eye-Catching Cover
The cover is the first thing potential readers will see, so make sure it is professionally designed and visually appealing. A high-quality cover can significantly impact your book’s perceived value and attract more readers.
4. Set a Competitive Price
Pricing your book competitively is essential. Research the prices of similar books in your genre and set a price that reflects the value of your content while remaining attractive to potential buyers.
5. Optimize Your Metadata
Metadata, including your book’s title, subtitle, keywords, and categories, plays a crucial role in search engine optimization (SEO). Use relevant keywords and phrases to improve your book’s visibility in search results.
Leveraging Online Marketing Channels
Online marketing channels offer numerous opportunities to promote your print-on-demand book. Here are some effective strategies:
1. Build an Author Website
An author website serves as a central hub for your marketing efforts. Include a blog, contact information, and links to purchase your book. Regularly update your website with new content to keep readers engaged.
2. Utilize Social Media
Social media platforms such as Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and LinkedIn are powerful tools for promoting your book. Share engaging content related to your book, including excerpts, behind-the-scenes stories, and updates on book events.
3. Start a Blog
Blogging is a great way to connect with your audience and showcase your expertise. Write posts related to your book’s theme, genre, or writing process. This can help attract readers who are interested in your book’s subject matter.
4. Email Marketing
Building an email list allows you to communicate directly with your readers. Send regular newsletters with updates, promotions, and exclusive content. Offer a free chapter or bonus material as an incentive for readers to join your list.
5. Engage in Online Communities
Participate in online forums and communities related to your book’s genre or subject. Engage with potential readers by offering valuable insights and contributing to discussions. Avoid direct promotion; instead, focus on building relationships.
6. Utilize Book Promotion Sites
There are numerous websites dedicated to promoting books. Consider listing your book on sites like BookBub, Goodreads, and other book promotion platforms to reach a broader audience.
Offline Marketing Strategies
While online marketing is essential, offline strategies can also play a significant role in promoting your print-on-demand book.
1. Attend Book Fairs and Festivals
Participating in book fairs and festivals can help you connect with readers and other authors. Bring copies of your book, promotional materials, and be prepared to engage with attendees.
2. Host Book Signings and Launch Events
Organize book signings and launch events at local bookstores, libraries, or community centers. These events provide an opportunity to meet readers in person and generate local buzz about your book.
3. Network with Local Media
Reach out to local newspapers, magazines, and radio stations to feature your book. Offer to write guest articles, participate in interviews, or provide review copies to journalists and bloggers.
4. Collaborate with Book Clubs
Partnering with book clubs can help you reach dedicated readers. Offer to attend meetings, provide discussion questions, or host virtual Q&A sessions.
5. Distribute Print Marketing Materials
Create bookmarks, postcards, and flyers featuring your book’s cover and description. Distribute them at local businesses, libraries, and community events to raise awareness.
Leveraging Print on Demand Book Publisher in India
Choosing the right print-on-demand book publisher in India can significantly impact your book’s success. Here are some top POD publishers to consider:
1. BFC Publications

BFC Publications offers comprehensive self-publishing services, including editing, design, and marketing support. They provide a range of distribution options, making it easier for your book to reach a wider audience.

2. Pothi
Pothi is a popular POD platform in India that offers flexible publishing options. They provide tools for creating, printing, and distributing your book, along with marketing support.
3. BlueRose Publishers
BlueRose Publishers offers various self-publishing packages tailored to different needs. They provide end-to-end services, including editing, design, and distribution.
4. Amazon Kindle Direct Publishing (KDP)
KDP is a well-known platform for both eBooks and print books. Their POD service allows you to reach a global audience through Amazon’s extensive distribution network.
Maximizing Reviews and Testimonials
Positive reviews and testimonials can significantly impact your book’s credibility and attract more readers. Here’s how to maximize them:
1. Encourage Reader Reviews
Ask readers to leave reviews on platforms like Amazon, Goodreads, and your author website. Positive reviews can boost your book’s visibility and credibility.
2. Reach Out to Book Bloggers
Book bloggers can provide valuable exposure for your book. Send review copies to bloggers in your genre and request honest reviews.
3. Leverage Beta Readers
Engage beta readers before your book’s official release. Their feedback can help improve your book, and their reviews can generate early buzz.
4. Use Testimonials in Marketing
Highlight positive testimonials in your marketing materials, including your website, social media, and book cover. Testimonials can serve as powerful endorsements for potential readers.
Monitoring and Adjusting Your Strategy
Marketing is an ongoing process that requires regular monitoring and adjustments. Use analytics tools to track your marketing efforts and determine what’s working and what’s not.
1. Track Sales and Traffic
Monitor your book sales and website traffic to identify trends and measure the effectiveness of your marketing strategies.
2. Adjust Your Approach
Based on your findings, adjust your marketing tactics to focus on the most effective channels. Continuously experiment with new strategies to keep your marketing fresh and engaging.
3. Engage with Your Audience
Stay connected with your readers through social media, email, and events. Engaging with your audience helps build a loyal reader base and encourages word-of-mouth promotion.
Conclusion
Marketing a print-on-demand book effectively requires a multifaceted approach that combines online and offline strategies. By understanding your target audience, optimizing your book’s presentation, leveraging various marketing channels, and continuously monitoring your efforts, you can maximize your book’s visibility and sales.
Whether you are a seasoned author or new to the world of Print-on-Demand Book publishing, these strategies can help you navigate the marketing landscape and achieve your goals. Remember, the key to successful marketing is consistency and adaptability. Keep experimenting with new ideas, stay engaged with your audience, and don’t be afraid to adjust your approach based on your results.
By following these guidelines, you can effectively market your print-on-demand book and reach a wider audience, ultimately turning your publishing venture into a success.
submitted by BFC_Publications to u/BFC_Publications [link] [comments]

2024.05.27 01:56 birdieboo21 List of 20 movies and TV shows that explicitly start with the statement "This is a true story," even though they may take significant creative liberties with the truth.

Below are some examples of shows that explicitly state "This is a true story" at the beginning, and end up not being exactly what they said it was.
American Horror Story
A Beautiful Mind
The Conjuring
American Hustle
The Social Network
Blow
The People vs. Larry Flynt
Changeling
The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford
The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford
Monster
The Revenant
Catch Me If You Can
Blair Witch
The Amityville Horror
Girl, Interrupted
Into the Wild
The Exorcism of Emily Rose
An American Crime
The Insider
"This is a true story" does not mean, 100% true and never will. Below is a list of movies that have said "This is a true story" and have taken many liberties with said "true story" If you have made it this far in life thinking that "This is a true story" means it's true word for word, Let Baby Reindeer along with this list of movies help you understand this is never going to be the case unless it's a documentary.
Maybe Baby Reindeer will shed some light that and finally make it common sense to understand that anything that is not a documentary is going to take liberties on "the truth" and in many ways has to take liberties in order to make the movie or show more interesting for the viewers.
Online sleuths, please do your homework and find out what's actually true after watching anything that's not an actual documentary. Don't go out there and start accusing anybody of anything unless you find out for a fact that what you saw on your television coming from Hollywood is based on actual factual truth. Don't contact directly either way, come on! You're better than this! Hollywood is Hollywood, smoke and mirrors, this should be common knowledge by now but apparently it isnt.
submitted by birdieboo21 to BabyReindeerTVSeries [link] [comments]

2024.05.26 22:05 ar_david_hh What happened on Sunday, May 26? // TT News //

6 minutes of Transcaucasian Telegraph.

several dead and missing after rivers flood northern Armenia caused by a clash of cold and hot currents from Siberia and Mediterranean

The water in the Debed River bed rose by 6 meters (another report says 2 meters), said the Veolia Water utility company on Sunday.
3 dead, 2 missing. Several houses were fully destroyed and around a hundred were flooded.
Over 230 people were evacuated in Lori and Tavush provinces and Yerevan. Hundreds of rescuers were dispatched to various locations.
In Akhtala rescuers were able to evacuate a 9-month pregnant woman in time. She gave birth at a nearby hospital in Alaverdi that luckily wasn't flooded. The mother and child are doing fine.
The bridge in Akhtala connected 7 villages with a total population of 5,500. They need a new solution because the bridge is gone. The government sent heavy equipment to repair an abandoned mountainous road as an alternative route.
11 bridges were partly or fully destroyed, leading to several villages being cut off from other settlements. Authorities said they will use helicopters if necessary to evacuate the residents and supply medication.
Authorities published a list of actions to take before, during, and after floods.
Metsavan's 5 million m3 water reservoir is completely full so experts were dispatched to release the water as a safety measure. There are also much smaller reservoirs used by hydropowerplants that could pose a danger to nearby areas, said the government, so rescuers and experts were sent to work on them and prevent problems.
Այսօրվա դրությամբ հանրապետության ողջ տարածքում տեղումների քանակը գերազանցել են ամսական նորման և կազմում է նորմայի 180-230%-ը:
PM Pashinyan visited the flooded areas and formed an operational center to manage the emergency situation. During the first session, the group discussed the restoration of bridges and other primary infrastructures necessary to connect communities to the world, as well as humanitarian and housing issues for the evacuated residents.
The residents were urged not to use the road leading to Bagratashen checkpoint with Georgia because the road was washed out. The railway company suspended trains to and from Georgia; the service will resume when the roads are restored.
The damage to infrastructure amounts to tens of billions of drams. Major damage was done to M6 and M4 interstate highways. The government cooperated with Georgia to re-route the traffic to Gogavan and Bavra.
Power lines, water pipes, and gas pipes were damaged. They are currently unable to assess the damage due to ongoing strong currents.
The water levels were down by 35 cm by late afternoon.
The government is discussing a compensation package for businesses and residents.
video, video, video, photo,
source, source, source, source, source, source, video, video, source, source, source, source, source, source,

... videos and photos from the disaster zone

moment the river destroys a small bridge in Tavush,
video of River Debed
video of residential areas in Tashir
video of Aghstev River destroying part of the Dilijan-Ijevan road
Pashinyan convincing residents of a condo surrounded by water to leave. They said they were fine and only needed electricity.
Alaverdi from above,
rescuers using a dinghy to reach residents of a condo in Alaverdi,
photos of tractor evacuating tati and residents trapped in condos
Akhtala from above,
patio rescue,
Metsavan reservoir is full but the wall is intact,
video of a river and construction crews moving rocks and forming barriers , video
video of Pashinyan visiting disaster area
Video of conversations with locals in flooded communities: video, video, video,
video of interior ministry report about rescue operations,
video of Pashinyan observing the river in Tavush video, drone video of the flood,
compilation video and report,
Tashir residents showing Pashinyan the damage,
River Aghstev in Ijevan-Lusadzor,
heavy hail and rain in Yerevan
Alaverdi residents' interviews and street floods,
the map of the major roads closed for traffic and alternatives you can use,

international response to Sunday floods

UNITED KINGDOM: We stand in solidarity with the residents of Lori and Tavush regions affected by the floods. We extend our condolences to the families of those who have lost their lives. We are closely monitoring the situation and recognise the efforts of the Armenian authorities at this time.
RUSSIA: We sincerely offer our condolences to the fraternal Armenian people in regard to the natural disaster that struck the Republic, and we wish the victims a speedy recovery. We stand ready to provide support.
UNITED STATES: The U.S. Embassy expresses its heartfelt sympathy with Armenia and its people following the deadly floods in Lori and Tavush.
source, source, source,

interview with weather tsar Surenyan

REPORTER: What can you tell us about this cyclone and where are the main active zones?
SURENYAN: This year May started with active cyclones. Most of them came from the west and Mediterranean basin. You may recall the heavy rain and hail in Yerevan and other parts of Armenia in the first weeks of May.
On May 24 we issued a special warning that a new cycle was approaching that would bring heavy precipitation. This one came from the Mediterranean on the evening of May 24.
Yesterday this warm Mediterranean current collided with a colder current from Siberia and became much stronger. Very intense rains were observed in Lori and Tavush on Saturday between 4 pm to midnight. Intense hail was observed in Armavir, Aragatsotn, and Kotayk. Yerevan was also struck with heavy rain and unprecedented strong thunders.
REPORTER: When was the last time this amount of water was observed in Debed?
SURENYAN: May of 1959, when the river carried 750 m3/second of water. Today we witnessed the second-highest amount, at 650 m3/second.
REPORTER: Are the river's water levels down as of this evening?
SURENYAN: Thankfully the cyclone is weakening and so are the rains. We have observed some reduction of levels in Aghstev and Debed. There were no rains today and we don't anticipate Saturday-like heavy rains again, so we expect a gradual reduction of levels.
REPORTER: What to expect in the coming days?
SURENYAN: The cycle is losing its power and as we speak, the rains are getting weaker in various regions. Between May 27 to 31, we won't have rains brought by the cycle but we do expect weaker rains to form locally within Armenia. They will be short. Expect them in the late evening and early night in various regions.
The temperatures are expected to significantly rise, by 4-6 degrees, until May 30. In the heavily affected areas, it will rise by 7-10 degrees.
video,

Georgia was also dealing with floods

video from an unknown location,
video of River Vere in Tbilisi,
15 villages were "isolated from the world" in southern Georgia, near the border with Armenia. The River Alazani on the GE-AZ border caused damage to nearby villages.
source,

show must go on

The former regime held its much anticipated mega-rally on May 26 attended by patriots from around the world.
«Օրակարգը պիտի ընթանա»
The protest co-organizer Archbishop Bagrat Galstanyan angered the H1 host Petros Ghazaryan and others by describing the planned Sunday rally as "the most important job" and urging his followers to "focus on it", amid deaths and destruction caused by the severe floods in northern Armenia. Galstanyan later held a moment of silence for those who lost their lives and urged his supporters in affected areas to stay and help others instead of visiting his rally in Yerevan.
During the Republic Square gathering they again gave Pashinyan an ultimatum. "This is your last chance," said the organizers. "You don't have much time."
The ex-regime went on to nominate Archbishop Galstanyan, a dual citizen of Canada, as their candidate for Prime Minister. Galstanyan will "freeze" his service in the church. As for the constitutional requirement that a PM cannot be a dual citizen, Galstanyan said they will act "lawfully" and will use "all possible means". Under the Constitution, the PM must be a citizen of only Armenia for at least 4 years to qualify for the position. It's unclear how the opposition plans to overcome this barrier.
Anywhere between 23,000 to 100,000 people attended the rally, depending on the source. Russian state media reported over 100,000 people. The Informed Citizens NGO cast doubt on that number. At 5:12pm, an hour after the scheduled launch, they counted 23,100 people and released the aerial footage here.
The NGO said they have information that several Russian-owned companies pressured their employees to join the rally. The information was given to the authorities as it is a crime in Armenia to bribe or pressure employees to join rallies.
Galstanyan led his followers towards Pashinyan's residency under the tune of "We Are the Champions" and other music, and demanded to speak with the PM. The PM's Deputy Chief of Staff called it a "provocation" and said: "The Prime Minister has been in the disaster zone since early morning. [Archbishop] Vazgen [Bagrat] Galstanyan who is marching to the government residency knows this well."
source, source, source, source, source, source, source, source, source,
submitted by ar_david_hh to armenia [link] [comments]

2024.05.26 21:46 TwoAccomplished7199 AITAH for being mad my family is still hanging out with my ex best friend?

This is going to be a little long and i apologize.
a little before october last year I ended my friendship with my (ex) best friend. We had been inseparable since we started hanging out in 2018 but over time I became a free babysitter and an easy person to manipulate.
I(24m) decided the friendship was done the night she(25f) decided to yell at me and my sisters(twins, 18) for not paying enough attention to her daughter(4). I had been with her and the kiddo almost non stop the entire week despite my protests just trying to give them support. Anytime i was with them, best friend would fall asleep and dump the kiddo on me. Any attempts to wake her up and i was always met with "just 15 more minutes" even after waiting 15 mins.
Then, the day after this incident i was trying to ignore her because i needed to calm down after her yelling at me like that. I was fuming. Well they show up at my grandparents house while i was visiting. She immediately drops her kid off with my gma and goes to join my siblings and i for a smoke. My gma was tryna cook, kid starts crying and my grandma just tells her to find her mom. Bestfriend hears this, whips out of the closed bedroom and goes "IM SMOKING WEED (childs name)"
That was the last straw. I ate dinner with my grandparents and left.
The week before this, she had called me screaming and crying that her boyfriend was getting violent and that the child was in the neighbors house because she was scared. (Pls note that this neighbor just got released from PRISON FOR ATTEMPTED MURDER) I dropped everything i was doing, called the police and went to go pick them up and get them out of there.
Well, i get there, and the entire time my best friend is bragging about how SHE threw the highchair at him and SHE hit him on the head with a wine bottle and all he did was pull decorations off the wall. All because she thought he was taking pills again bc he was asleep at his computer desk. (Plot twist, this time he was actually not taking them).
As far as im aware, they are still unaware that it was me that called the police. I ended up calling cps as well. None of this was okay, and it hadnt been for a while. I shouldn't have tried to help for so long. I should have called sooner but i just saw my bestfriend with rose colored glasses. I sent her a text explaining that i was proud of how well she was doing before her boyfriend, and that it hurt to watch her continously return to that man and watch her regress. nothing i could ever say to her would be enough to help, once her mind was made up, it was her way or the highway. I told her i could not contimue to enable this and to not contact me. I blocked her.
My family BEGGED me to talk to her and to not throw away the friendship. I refused, citing the constant manipulation and lying. That woman is a stain on my mental health and its long overdue i did something about it.
Fast forward to today, my sisters graduated and due to work i could not make it. I get on facebook and my grandparents posted pictures with my ex best friend at the ceremony sitting with them.
I know theyve been hanging out with her, i have endlessly expressed how hurtful and disrespectful it is but it just falls on deaf ears. She uses my sisters and my grandparents the same way she used me.
I reached out to my mom about how upset i was, and told her if they want to replace her with me then just go ahead. My mom pretty much told me i need to "stop being hateful because the world needs more kindness." And basically ended it there. Told me if i was mad at her, then there was nothing she could do but just be sad about the situation.
My grandparents basically say the same thing anytime i express how much it hurts, and tell me my ex bestfriend feels like a bonus daughter to them. My sisters like her because she supplies them weed and takes them where they want to go. They mutually use each other and then complain about it.
I just... i had been trying to go low contact with my family for so long and quit because i thought my relationship with my family was improving. But no, my ex best friend steals the spotlight. I try to offer the girls my help, a car ride whatever they need but they reach out to my exbf instead. I feel so replaced and everyone keeps telling me i cant be mad about it.
Every holiday i cant relax. I have this deep rooted fear shes going to show up. Mostly, because when i dropped her she flipped her lid about not being able to have Christmas at my familys house anymore. And my grandma still wants to invite her to the holidays. Right now, she wont allow her there while im around because i told her i will cause a scene if my exbf said a single sideways comment to me. And now my fear is even more cemented with her being at my sisters graduation.
Aita for wanting my family to drop her?
submitted by TwoAccomplished7199 to AITAH [link] [comments]

2024.05.26 21:34 FXgram_ From Boom to Bust: The Dangerous Dance of Stock Valuations

Profit is a figure that changes from year to year and shows how well the company performed in a given year. The stock price is many times higher than the annual profit per share, and it is a much more volatile thing. In the 20th century, the price-to-earnings ratio tended toward 15, meaning people were willing to pay about 15 years' worth of earnings for an average company, but there was no clear trend. In years of economic growth, people were willing to pay more, and during a crisis, the value of businesses fell. Plus, there are also factors like future prospects, technology, and monopoly position. For example, Facebook was valued at nearly 100 years' worth of earnings at its IPO. Some analysts thought investors had completely lost their minds. And they weren't wrong.
Back in 1929, this ratio rose to 35, and even then, people started to get nervous. Others, however, began to think that the market could only go up. There was a lot of optimism among traders. Before the 2000s crisis, it reached an even higher number - 46, but then it suddenly corrected itself so sharply that traders started jumping out of windows.
submitted by FXgram_ to XGramatikInsights [link] [comments]

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submitted by Brilliant_Emu6451 to TheRepTimeBST [link] [comments]

2024.05.26 17:18 Alert-Emu-5205

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<strong>"Joan Smalls Stuns in Mariano Vivanco's Enigmatic Shoot for Harper's Bazaar Arabia March 2018: A Dazzling Fusion of Glamour and Mystery"</strong><br />
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https://tinyurl.com/2b279wut
submitted by Alert-Emu-5205 to celebrity_galleries [link] [comments]

2024.05.26 07:11 SufficientTangelo367 A list of all the proposed mergers/acquisitions that never came through.

Disclaimer: I'm bringing it here before any shutdown of AMH because lately, there's random stuff being posted there and a lack of control.

*Deals from 2020 onward might still be possible in some ways.
1927:
1929:
1956:
1957:
1958:
1971:
1982:
1984:
1985:
1987:
1989:
1991:
1992:
1993:
1994:
1995:
1996:
1997:
1998:
1999:
2000:
2001:
2002:
2003:
2004:
2005:
2006:
2007:
2008:
2009:
2010:
2011:
2012:
2013:
2014:
2015:
2016:
2017:
2018:
2019:
2020:
Around this time, Lionsgate made an unsolicited offer to merge Starz with ViacomCBS' Showtime.
2021:
2022:
2023:
submitted by SufficientTangelo367 to MediaMergers [link] [comments]

2024.05.26 05:58 Ashihei Sexuality Wars… 🩷💜🩵 (story time)

Hello Bi folk of the internet… I have an experience to share…. not really for a specific reason, just because I wanted to share it in a space that, I hope, is kind and understanding. I’m just going to brain-dump from my memory so, here we go…
Eight-ish years ago, I started a shitty new retail job and became instant best friends with my coworker. Her and I, (36 and 23), became the embodiment of friendship soulmates. Instantly we found soulmate level kind of love in one another; confiding our woes, sharing hysterical laughter over the silliest things, engaging in one another’s interests, the gifts, the coffees. We were the purest form of friendship I’ve ever encountered.
During the duration of our workplace friendship, we had a… customer (and I use that term VERY loosely, as their presence in the store was wholly for my friend, no money being spent)… someone who came in quite often to visit with us. Our coworkers were openly active in the LGBTQIA+ community here, so their acquaintances often popped in for a visit. No biggy! This customer however, an older (50’s) M-to-F trans woman, was not like the rest. As soon as she set eyes on my friend, there was no relenting to the constant and vulgar commenting and ‘flirtation’ with her. She was relentless and it made my friend exponentially uncomfortable, understandably. This woman would come in and continually tell her how she wanted to have sex with my friend, how she knew she could ‘convert’ from her hetero ways, for my friend to be the one to take her new ‘trans-virginity’ and what have you, in a magnitude of ways. It was pushy, it was unwarranted and unreciprocated and above all, it was relentless. My friend and I had discussed at length how this made her feel, being a vehemently straight woman. Her soft spoken nature had her hiding in the back room until this person had left, just to not be confronted with the constant harassment. The day her and I both ended up leaving our jobs was a sigh of relief for her, knowing the constant sexuality terrorisim had finally ended.
Although our time at our job had ended, our friendship continued to remain strong and holdfast to the tests of time. My friend had, months prior to our job departure, had confided in me the revelation that she was unhappy with her current partner and their marriage. Not my place to air their marital woes, but long and short of it, she wanted a baby and he did not. They spent months trying to discuss and work out their issues, trying to make things work, to no avail. As time passed, her loyalty wavered and cast her attention elsewhere…
The internet is a funny place. People can be unapologetically alluring via text, like a venomous spider in a web of toxicity, coaxing you in before sinking their poison in, one drop at a time. This is precisely how she came to meet her current partner.
The ex military, Xanax addicted, mentally unstable, narcissistic, abusive, compulsive liar, criminal record toting southerner. He was everything I normally detest in a person, and he was now leechishly attached to my best friend. He spun stories of how much better of a life he could give her, how the first thing he’d do was put a baby in her, how he was so much better than her current husband… he fed her every line in the book, and she drank it down like he was the oasis she was desperately searching the desert to find. From the outside looking in, it was plain to see what he was all about, but for some reason, she was blind to it. Rose coloured glasses tint the world in dangerous ways.
Time passed and he, relentless as ever, chipped away to remove her husband from the picture, the house they owned, and the entirety of the life they had built as high school sweethearts. He spent months painstakingly whittling away at her mentally as well (as abusers do), to shape her into his perfect, passive possession to own and manipulate as he saw fit. She jumped through every hoop to make things work, giving him every penny she had, driving hours to see him for a day and drive all the way back the next, paperwork to bypass his ongoing criminal past haunting their relationship; she did it all, all while he greedily took without a thought or a care. They married, city hall style, before the ink on her own divorce papers had even dried. She endured the time consuming and expensive process of taking his new surname legally as her own. He overtook her life like a disease corrupting the body, one cell at a time.
When it came time for her to express her desire for the child she wanted, the one he had spend months emptily promising, he begrudgingly relented, or so it seemed. There was only so long he could use that as a maneuvering chip, ever looming over their relationship. Confided within our friendship, I was told by her how during intimacy, he would ask if she wanted a baby. Ask her and ask her during the act… making her practically beg… before pulling out and saying not yet. Her womanly clock ticked ominously over her head, making her ache for the family she so desperately wanted to start. Finally, he obliged and she did become pregnant… … only to lose the baby a few months later.
It broke my heart to see her become this diminished caricature of the friend I loved and cherished so deeply. He was little help to her too, often choosing to sleep (I’m assuming because of his drug abuse) or play games as opposed to talking with her when she was with him. She was broken, the “no I slipped and fell down the stairs” demeanour he moulded her into now her only piece of identity. She was heartbroken from the loss of her beloved baby, struggling with the ability to cope. I stood by her, a friend willing to do whatever in the absence of her partner, to make sure she was ok. When she was struggling, I was there either in person or on the phone, taking her to the hospital in a time of crisis, being there the best I could. His record kept him physically away, but sadly, his hooks locked in deep within her broken psyche, ever festering and refusing to relinquish its filthy grip. As their relationship simmered and she healed as much as she could from the loss. I could see her trying to repair slowly, no thanks to him, and move past her despair. Then, unexpectedly, it happened for her again. She was pregnant! I was happy for her, so happy to see her becoming a mother, her dream! Despite the bond it would weave between her and him, she was finally going to become the mother she was always meant to be. We talked of her baby, the nicknames we had for them, the future she hoped for them and how I would be an aunt of sorts; our bond was so deep and I was so happy to be there to share this with her. I was able to come to her ultrasounds, which thrilled me to the core. I remember seeing the baby for the first time with her, tearing up with delight for her… until I was told her partner didn’t want me, in particular, to be there. He didn’t want me to have any part of the pregnancy, to know the gender, names, nothing. For a time, he knew I had his number, could see the abuse he inflicted on my friend, both mentally and physically. With abusive men it seems, when they see someone who can see past their facade, well that made me enemy no. 1 in his eyes. He tried his damnedest to keep us apart, telling her I was a bitch and that I didn’t like him (which was true), and how I was intentionally coming between them, trying to split them up. He’d withhold attention from her when she was there, as a sort of sick punishment for associating with me. She as no longer allowed to talk to me, she couldn’t post anything about me or us, get upset when I was mentioned. He knew I knew exactly what he was doing and was scared I would show her the way out. When I couldn’t get ahold of her on one of her trips down to see him, I had messaged him asking if she had made it ok. He had red the message, I had seen it, but he claimed I didn’t message at all. I showed her upon returning, now seeing I had been blocked by him. Tensions were rising and I knew, when I was told I specifically was not to be involved with their child and her as little as possible (despite the criminal record keeping him at a distance), I knew our days as friends were numbered. To his credit, I did try to explain how toxic things were with them. When the fights became vile, leaving her crying in the back room at work because he was refusing to talk to her, i told her this wasn’t normal with a partner. I tried, all while trying to maintain our cherished friendship, to show her she was being abused.
Now comes the relevancy to this post being in this specific group… Her and I were close, messaging often, talking daily, told one another “I love you”, we had matchy tattoos done together, we knew nearly every facet about one another, had gone bra shopping together; we were the best of friends. FRIENDS.
With his oh so pleasant ‘southern charm and point of view’ on the world (racist, sexist and vile), he didn’t take too lightly to homosexuality. Constantly she would tell me how embarrassed she was when they went out and he would see a same sex couple; “who let the fucking f***ots in here?!” Knowing my friend, the constant harassment she endured at our former place of employment, he knew exactly how to drive a wedge in irreversibly deep; deep enough to cleave us apart entirely. “She’s just a dirty cunt of a lesbian, looking to fuck you the first chance she gets. That’s why she’s hanging around you with the ‘I love you’ all the fucking time, trying to break us up. She wants you for herself.”
Like the falling of the executioners axe, it was done. The talking daily stopped, the sentiments of love ceased. It was night and day with her. I could see after that, after the public Facebook comments he had made about me under photos of my friend and I together, after that comment, she had changed. He had won.
I remember crying during one of the truly last times we had spent together, before she packed up and moved her life down south with him… I had cried so hard knowing that this was going to be it for us. It was like watching a beloved creature wither and die in your arms. You want to stop it, you care so deeply and can’t fathom the thought of living without it… all while knowing that there’s not a damn thing you. An do. He had weaponized sexuality against me, not even knowing who I was or a fractal about our friendship. She hadn’t been aware of my bisexuality; I hadn’t truly known how deep it was in me back then either, but it certainly wasn’t something I wanted to share with her after her experience with the trans woman at work. I didn’t see my friend like that. I loved her so deeply, on a soul level, and cherished the friendship we had. Unwittingly, he had taken a part of me that I didn’t realize was more potent than it was and was buried so deep inside me, and made it a vile weapon of manipulation.
I’m scared now in my current friendships to be honest about who and how I am. My current partner, the first person whom I’ve ever told outright that I am bisexual, knows and has been beyond supportive. My friends though… none know out of my own fear of losing the friendships I currently have. I know with true friendships, they would accept me for me now… but the heartache of this whole experience, has terrified me into hiding this vital part of me. My mother and family could never accept it, and I know that… but now, in my 30’s, I desperately wish to own this part of me, wearing it with pride as opposed to hiding in fear.
I guess I just wanted to share this here, as my first step into owning who I am out loud, despite the fear and (wrongly) infused shame. I am bisexual, and I’m not hiding anymore…
Thanks for taking the time to read this. Just wanted to… share my story, if not wholly, but a part. If anyone else out there is being shamed, just know it’s ok to be exactly who you are. You owe nothing, not a thing, to anyone but yourself. Live and let live, those who love you truly, will be wholly by your side, despite what the other think or say.
🩷💜🩵
submitted by Ashihei to bisexualadults [link] [comments]

2024.05.24 23:48 djester808 [FS] - Duluth, MN - $1.50+ Neocaridina and Caridina Shrimp

[FS] - Duluth, MN - $1.50+ Neocaridina and Caridina Shrimp
MEMORIAL WEEKEND DEAL! 20% OFF store wide!! (Culls and items marked as new not applicable)!!
💯% DOA guarantee (not applicable for free shrimp or culls). Extras will be provided for every 5 ordered. I do require pictures as proof in a reasonable time frame from delivery. Please reach out to me with any problems regarding your order. I will work with you to resolve the matter.
--NEOCARIDINA--
Parameters - GH 6 - 10, KH 2, PH 7.5
Amano: $3
Fire Red Cherry: $2.50
Snowball: $2.50
Sunkist: $2.50
Red Rilli: $2.50
Black Rose: $3.25
Blue Jelly: $3.25
Blue Rilli: $3.25
Blue Dream: $3.25
Bloody Mary: $3.25
Golden Yellowback: $3.25
Orange Rilli: $3.25
Blood Orange: $4
Green Jade: $4
Blue Diamond: $4 - NEW!!!
Green Rili: $6
Koi Starburst: $10 - NEW!!! (Pre-order)
Green Venom/Cantaloupe: $10 - NEW!!! (Pre-order)
Culls (Limited Quantity, Deals not applicable, Mixed, Unsexed): $1.50
10 + 2 Skittles pack $35 (one of each or mix and match from cherry, blue dream, green jade, blue jelly, snowball, Sunkist, black Rose
--CARIDINA--
Parameters - GH 4 - 6, KH 0 - 1, PH 6.5
PRL: $5
PBL: $5
Blue Bolts: $5
Extreme Blue Bolt: $10
Boa: $15
--FOOD--
Snowflake Shrimp Food (3oz): $7
Spirulina Shrimp Food (3oz): $7
--PLANTS & BOTANICALS--
Java Moss: $8 (golf ball size)
Christmas Moss: $8 (golf ball size)
Alternanthera Reineckii: $5.50
Cryptocoryne Wendtii: $6.50
Java Fern: $9
Anubias Nana: $9
--BOTANICALS--
Almond Leaf: $0.50
Alder Cones (3 oz): $7
Chola Wood: $3.50
Banana Leaves: $0.50
Mixed botanical packs: $12 - $16
--HARDGOODS--
Food Dish : $5.00
Shrimp Net: $6
Feel free to reach out if you have any questions related to shrimp, acclimation, your order, or common aquarium questions. Feel free to check us out on Facebook or our website, Superior Shrimp & Aquatics. There you can find reviews of our top notch customer service, shipping standards and products as well as current deals, offerings, and any other exciting news! Happy shrimping!
Shipping costs range from 6 to 12 for priority or ground shipping depending on where you live. I reserve the right to use either service depending on the delivery window and/or cost. I ship as long as it doesn't get below 0° F. I use insulated boxes. Heat packs are available for purchase. UPS 2 day and overnight shipping available. Extras will be provided for orders that have 5 shrimp and above.
submitted by djester808 to AquaSwap [link] [comments]

2024.05.24 23:24 Longgame2010 Am I the jerk for being honest about my feelings to my little sister?

I Michael (M28) and my sister Chloe (26)have always had a difficult relationship. When my mother was pregnant with my sister there were some complications and she only had about a 5% chance of being born healthy. She was born healthy and has had no health issues.
Due to this my mother and father have always favoured her over me examples include buying her presents on my birthday so she doesn't feel left out, letting her plan my birthday parties and inviting her friends this has gone on my whole life, Chloe wants something = she gets it whether it's right then right there or overtime nagging until she gets it, we grew up fairly poor and struggled for money but my parents would take out loans for her birthdays to get her the best new phones, laptops you name it I on the other hand would get essentials like socks.
When I was due to go to college I had to work my ass off and put myself through college. When it was her time I found out my parents had set up a savings account and put money in it every pay check to save for her fees, meaning she had almost no student fees. When I was at college I met my best friend Adam we bonded very quickly through whilst at college he met Tayler after about 2 years of dating Adam and Tayler married, my sister threw a tantrum about not being invited at the time and felt entitled about coming as I was going and was the best man. Adam did end up giving in and inviting her to just keep the peace.
In 2020 Tayler passed away in a car crash she was also pregnant at the time so it was a huge blow for Adam his whole future was wiped out in one evening, I was there for Adam and helped him arrange everything for the funerals throughout this whole time Chloe wanted to be involved but thankfully she wasn't otherwise their funerals would've been the Chloe show.
In early 2021 Chloe called me and asked to meet me at our parents house. I went and they were all sat down in the living room, this is when Chloe told me that she was 6 months pregnant and that Adam was the father. Obviously I was shocked I didn't even know Adam liked her in that way, this is where things get complicated Adam and Chloe had a one night stand and she fell pregnant when she told Adam about it he said that he didn't want to be involved in the babies life and that sleeping with her was a huge mistake he needed to focus on getting in a better state mentally and this wouldn't be fair on a baby (Adam was wanting to be reunited with Tayler).
Chloe said she understood and wouldn't pressure him at all but she wanted to keep the baby, throughout her whole pregnancy Adam worked on himself and always made it clear to her that he didn't want to be part of her or the baby's life. When the baby was born Chloe named the baby Angelica- Rose (this was the exact same as Adam and Tayler's baby and she knew this) she also sent him a picture of Angelica which read "God brought me back to you daddy". Adam flipped I think it was an even bigger reminder to him for everything he'd lost.
Since giving birth my sister has been slandering Adam all over social media calling him a deadbeat dad etc and bad mouthing him every chance she gets.
My opinion on this (albeit unpopular is) that he isn't a deadbeat dad cause he simply isn't a dad not to Chloe's baby anyway. I truly believe that Chloe made the decision to carry on with her pregnancy under the full knowledge she'd be doing it alone. I see it as she tried to force him into having this baby and being a father, now imagine if the roles were reversed if a man got a woman pregnant and refused any of her pleas of not wanting the baby people would call that man a monster and the woman a victim but when it comes to a woman forcing a man into becoming a father he's a deadbeat?
Last weekend myself Chloe and Angelica-rose were at our parents for my mother's birthday and Chloe went on her usual rant about Adam and my parents started to join in too, now I just lost it and told them all exactly how I see it that Chloe tried to baby trap Adam and it backfired but he was honest with her about why he didn't want to be involved and that when Chloe named her baby what she did that this was really a kick in the teeth for Adam and one of the cruellest things I have ever seen anyone do. Of course like everything with my parents and Chloe they sided with her and told me I was out of order for saying my beliefs to Chloe and I was kicked out of the house.
Chloe has now also blocked me on everything and I have been told that she has told my niece whom I love and have looked after every single Wednesday and Thursday since she was born that I am dead, I honestly don't know how I can fix this and even if I want to I am thinking about phoning CPS on her but don't know if I can or they wouldn't care I can't stand the thought of my niece thinking I died as we are very close. I think if I apologise she might let me see Angelica- Rose again but I don't know if I should apologise for just being honest with Chloe that she chose this life for herself and now needs to deal with it.
But AITA or should I have just kept my mouth shut?
Update: So this blew up a lot more than expected, some people on here have mentioned documenting everything so that's exactly what I'm gonna do, I've started so far with asking a mutual friend to screenshot everything my sister has shared on her Facebook r.e me and I've put every photo I've ever taken of me and Angelica Rose in a folder and will be making physical copies of everything, I also messaged my parents yesterday asking if I could come over and speak with them, they have said yes and I will be going round at the weekend. I am also going to be recording this conversation and talk about Angelica- Rose to them and I am also considering laying everything out on the table about how they've made me feel my whole life (after that I am going to go NC with them both, if it goes the way I think its going to)
In terms of Adam and a DNA test, I don't think one was ever done he never contested being the father as he never intended to be round for the baby anyway, although he isn't physically a presence in the Angelicas life he does support my sister financially which is what he said he'd always do, I have a lot of Angelica's stuff at my house given that she used to be here two days a week so i'm gonna speak with Adam about doing a DNA test to see if he really is her bio dad.
Both me and Adam work for the same company and both have put in a transfer request, mine to get away from my family and his was so he could have a fresh start somewhere new hopefully both get approved and we will both be moving to a new state.
submitted by Longgame2010 to AmITheJerk [link] [comments]

2024.05.24 22:21 CrazyTheatreChick Update

Edit to add the link to my last post here.
I actually forgot about my post so I apologize. I didn't even realize so many of you messaged me to check in or offer kind words.
A lot happened in a short time but I will try to make it brief.
Fin came to my home again but I was not home. On my ring cam I saw him have a total fit. He was cursing me out, calling me on the phone, and when he got my vociemail he muttered "I'm going to fcking kll her" over and over again and said it super loud once before walking off.
I have been getting a lot of hate mail, texts, and the like calling me a murderer. My Facebook was flooded with these messages as well and most of the profiles were people who went to Fin's church. So I sent him a text that either the harassment stops or I will post the recordings of him. All of them. The call, his threats, the texts, his voicemails...all of it. He replied "I have been patient in my love for you but you are being a brat." And went on to say that I need to come to my senses and meet with him because he will no longer spoil me and "discipline needs to be introduced' to our relationship because actions have consequences.
As for the rest I will skip over a bit for the sake of brevity.
My bestie said that I should go to the police and we did but nothing concrete has come of it yet. Something I low-key expected honestly. It's a small little "city" outside a bigger more populated one and the small town vibes can run deep in certain circles. Many of the people go to to the church Fin is at and that includes a lot of the police department.
It came to a head last week when I sent some of the recordings to his parents who are on staff at the local "megachurch" in the area. His mom responded and asked to meet with me so I went with my bestie to a public spot in the city.
When she met with me she was incredibly apologetic and said that his position at the church is terminated. The staff will meet about this and decide on the full measure of consequences as his church family. She told me that she herself had an abortion before Fin was born and her decision to do so came hugely from the fact that the father was manipulative and abusive and she was not rrady to be a mother even if she had a reliable and loving partner and coparent. She went on to meet Fin's father and married him and had her children. She told me that she isn't sure if I had an abortion or miscarriage but either way I should not be harassed by "christians" claiming to be prolife. I can't explain to you the relief those words gave me considering the vile that was messaged to me. Fins sister reached out to me via text to share that she does not condone what her brother has been doing and to reach out if I needed anything.
Fin later was arrested for assault I came to find out but I don't know who he assaulted or why. Just that he was taken into custody and as he put me down as his partner, I was called to pick him up as he had been released (the running assumption is the kept him to sober up before releasing him). I didn't.
I have since been looking for a new place to live as he knows my address and has come by more than a couple times. I am staying with two of my best friends away from my town and my home is more or less storage for my things until I find a place to move.
All things considered I am actually really happy. My friends threw me a "yeetus that feetus" party and decorated the place with the troll comments from my last post, they made a pinata with scrapped paper with his texts and that of his church pals and instead of candy it had condoms, small bottle of lube, and paper that was my last suprise; they pool together a nice sized donation to reproductive health clinic near my city and they pledged hours to volunteer.
We are taking a summer trip together to have a "hot girl summer" kickoff and have many things planned. The two male friends I am staying with check on my house for me and saw Fin there once and made it clear under no uncertain terms that I was "protected" and that if he tries to make more trouble that "actions have consequences." I have it recorded on my ring cam and it was glorious.
Fin sent me a text telling me that I am a cruel witch that ruined his life n broke his heart all because he loved me but to not trouble myself with acting scared of him more because he is leaving the state soon for a new job anyway. He did end the message with "I have, do, and always will love you and perhaps one day your cold heart will melt and you can find within it your buried love for me." Like bro, take the sugar out of your kool-aid because I ain't drinking it anymore.
Not to say everything is sunshine and roses. I have been in a lot of therapy and finding that I overlooked a lot of red flags and have to unlearn a lot of people pleasing behaviors to become a more confident and true version of myself. Plus my friends don't really fully believe he is leaving town so I am still staying with them for the time being. I love them a lot but it's like having 4 older siblings fussing about like mother hens. I cannot wait to have my new place.
Thanks to you all for the kindness and support . I think this is my last update on the matter as I don't intend on wasting any more time than I have to on that abusive price of garbage. Remember, you know yourself best and can love yourself best - life is too short not to make the right choices for yourself, your well-being, and your happiness because you matter ❤️
submitted by CrazyTheatreChick to AITAH [link] [comments]

2024.05.24 14:07 Physical_Anteater_51 Facebook ads ROAS is up

Or is FB ROAS down? What do I do? Nothing.
I use an outside agency for media buying right now, but in the past, I did my own media buying for the company I work for, and this is how I judged performance.
I don’t use roas.
Why is there no ROAS for me?
The simple answer is that it doesn’t work.
In-platform Return on Ad Spend (ROAS) metrics on Facebook are easy to access. Flush it.
I use the Marketing Efficiency Ratio. (MER) lately, I like AMER.
What’s the difference between MER and ROAS?
ROAS is in the platform; platforms use modeled data for attribution to calculate this number, which is critical to this number. So, if Facebook makes a sale and the attribution system is unaware, that will throw off your calculation. In my experience, spending $300,000 a month, ROAS is off by 35 to 45% year to date. My in-platform NC ROAS right now is 1.38% for this same period AMER(new customer MER is 2.09
So I'd be screwed if I was using ROAS. I’d be in the account shutting off ads messing with things given more budget to one thing in there every day because the roads I’d be in the account shutting off ads messing with things given more budget to one thing in there every day because the rose was rotten yesterday oh my gosh I have to change that that’s a death spiral for a Facebook account next thing you know you’re in the shitte was bad yesterday oh my gosh I have to change that that’s a death spiral for a Facebook account next thing you know you’re in the shitter
AMER is real numbers with no modeling; we use the same calculation as ROAS
new customer gross revenues from Shopify /by ad spend=AMER
I don’t think some of you can easily pull down and see NC revenue. I got it from a Shopify Plus report, but I did the same thing using MER before I made it to Plus.
No trusted Attribution: I ran around in circles using attribution tools.
Hypothetical:
ROAS is good on Google and bad on Facebook. We want business to grow, so what do we do? Allocate to Google. Even worse, business is terrible. We see that Google Road is passable, and Facebook is low, so we cut Facebook spending. Result- the business gets bad.
In-platform ROAS on Facebook credits conversions solely to the last click or interaction before buying and looking at ROAS. The next logical step of tracking ROAS is feed better ads kill bad ads, so start shutting off all ads at the top of the funnel. That's not going to end well.
So what do I do? I use spend as the indicator.
If I had a disaster ad account( and I have had one a few times), I would keep all my ads in one campaign till it performs well. Then, I can test another campaign. But watch MER, not ROAS, to judge results.
I’ve been leaning on MER for 2.5 years now. And it’s been a good few years. I’ve recently had Capi, so I’m improving at platform data. How do we use that data? Carefully, It's not an attribution tool; the cap is still the last click. LC will tell you to kill TOF ads.
I like to use NCROAS in accounts that are in a steep death dive. If an account is doing well (from MER), I would never open up a business manager and start shutting ads based on NCROAS from Capi.
With an ad account on life support, that’s what will most likely be needed.
Keep in mind up until recently, I was only on one ad account for three years. Many people here are in dozens of ad accounts with 20x more spending. I
My methods came from Learning about FB ads(and all marketing) from YouTube(Twitter, podcasts, and books) and some of those folk's posts. So, I’m not the guru. I can point out many accounts I learned from. Charley T, Konstantinos, Nick Theriot
Also, Cody Phlohker from Jones Road Beauty (he will audit your account if you buck up, and he runs a 200m company) is good to get on Cody's newsletter. It’s sponsored, so be aware you are in a funnel, but the meat is there.
I'm building a page on my pet website for the people I watched to gain my POV on FB; none of it was my brain. I would say this: if you are starting or you’re having trouble I wouldn’t watch videos of three guys on YouTube I would try to figure out which one is the most successful method and follow one person until you have that account-crushing it and then you can branch out into other people’s
submitted by Physical_Anteater_51 to FacebookAds [link] [comments]

2024.05.24 02:27 HashTagFinallyWoke Gun Shop Owner Jon Bieker Died in Gunfight With 4 Robbery Suspects DeAnthony Wiley Hakeem Malik Nicquan Midgyett Londro Patterson

Gun Shop Owner Jon Bieker Died in Gunfight With 4 Robbery Suspects DeAnthony Wiley Hakeem Malik Nicquan Midgyett Londro Patterson
DeAnthony A Wiley, Hakeem W Malik, Nicquan K Midgyett, Londro E Patterson III, Jon A Bieker
https://youtu.be/UTSCXgl1FrU?t=18
https://youtu.be/TAK0HXsuedU?t=2
https://youtu.be/_ghZVxmHD7I?t=8
https://youtu.be/gxr5ux1J2ZM?t=49
https://youtu.be/lbw3AaQkZ7c?t=54
https://youtu.be/8Dp11EC6D98?t=8
https://youtu.be/oj8VSrlG0Vk?t=84
https://youtu.be/2jeBuHVSoOc?t=20
https://youtu.be/8t_8EbsbyCs?t=55
https://youtu.be/Ck86p9GYrx0?t=14
https://fox4kc.com/news/suspects-in-murder-of-shes-a-pistol-store-hear-evidence-against-them/
https://x.com/stopH8zone/status/562818578093998081
https://youtu.be/NPg66FRwDHg?t=69
https://youtu.be/bFOXllbA0NU?t=8
https://youtu.be/VBzyuD70UKE?t=6
https://youtu.be/OVFp8GdQrJU?t=35
https://youtu.be/Am4SIjmsaeY?t=56
https://youtu.be/iW23vUsp_7o?t=14
https://youtu.be/mgy6ROkMmYg?t=49
https://youtu.be/jXyeL89nkd8?t=113
https://youtu.be/AYOOiQAwJ6o?t=22
https://youtu.be/isU63FchbJU?t=38
https://youtu.be/1SyWVk3-hC0?t=13
https://youtu.be/tSUaLGYuzwM?t=32
https://youtu.be/Q3dfo7JL8Ts?t=36
https://youtu.be/17wAvV1AmKY
https://youtu.be/G8hmqN-PTuA?t=18
https://www.kmbc.com/article/gun-store-shooting-suspect-appears-ready-for-guilty-plea/3689720
https://kansaspublicradio.org/local-news/2015-04-20/charges-added-in-killing-of-kansas-gun-store-owner
https://www.kmbc.com/article/third-suspect-sentenced-in-shes-a-pistol-murder-case/19637179
https://www.kmbc.com/article/suspect-in-shes-a-pistol-shooting-pleads-guilty-to-murder-of-store-owner-jon-bieke14429236
https://x.com/kmbc/status/941093144682119169
https://x.com/MollyRoseTV/status/554421891406905344
https://x.com/shawneedispatch/status/676416336768069632
https://x.com/KSHB41/status/625807389304844288
Surveillance Video
https://youtu.be/VnYW3wof3qk
https://youtu.be/w6ZpmAhaxv4?t=35
https://gofund.me/9cce6d55
https://youtu.be/Pt1QSyrjr7s
https://youtu.be/pxf6zCPhxWE
https://youtu.be/Bf8gqSFI1f8?t=90
https://youtu.be/7ehiB87wkAs?t=29
https://youtu.be/m5yzB56WGLo?t=41
https://youtu.be/o64qkfQIzas?t=6
https://youtu.be/PQYbG8qbACg?t=32
https://youtu.be/F02fujzY1Zg?t=52
https://youtu.be/PdLm4v9f59U?t=8
https://youtu.be/tRQMJCh1ZMY?t=6
https://youtu.be/IWISKtHD6PA?t=60
https://youtu.be/xas5S7G8dYE?t=56
https://youtu.be/uEJEmgwmFG8?t=5
https://youtu.be/jXyeL89nkd8?t=50
https://youtu.be/3ach0EwNZvY?t=11
https://www.facebook.com/ShesAPistolLLC/
https://www.legacy.com/us/obituaries/kansascity/name/jon-bieker-obituary?id=4171687
https://gunmemorial.org/2015/01/09/jon-bieker
https://www.amosfamily.com/obituary/Jon-Bieker
https://x.com/EmilyRittman/status/979487960268771329
https://x.com/_HaleyHarrison/status/555883581910687745
https://x.com/BrianKMBC/status/556586325277564928
https://x.com/jenkers_en/status/626192421790027780
https://youtu.be/Z2L6RGKNlEA
https://youtu.be/Rc-uBvFGWfs
https://youtu.be/vUb05mQ7VGM
https://youtu.be/ILS8Ccz2LRg
https://youtu.be/iihLrfKrl5I
https://youtu.be/DGo4rnl-Jdg
https://youtu.be/c2H0MDwOPQU
https://youtu.be/igdZXOakepc
https://youtu.be/SrpLljwXWTA
https://youtu.be/d_L54Dm3PC4
https://youtu.be/sQ5e-gZidXo
submitted by HashTagFinallyWoke to Justice4Victims [link] [comments]

2024.05.24 02:26 HashTagFinallyWoke Gun Shop Owner Jon Bieker Died in Gunfight With 4 Robbery Suspects DeAnthony Wiley Hakeem Malik Nicquan Midgyett Londro Patterson

DeAnthony A Wiley, Hakeem W Malik, Nicquan K Midgyett, Londro E Patterson III, Jon A Bieker
https://youtu.be/UTSCXgl1FrU?t=18
https://youtu.be/TAK0HXsuedU?t=2
https://youtu.be/_ghZVxmHD7I?t=8
https://youtu.be/gxr5ux1J2ZM?t=49
https://youtu.be/lbw3AaQkZ7c?t=54
https://youtu.be/8Dp11EC6D98?t=8
https://youtu.be/oj8VSrlG0Vk?t=84
https://youtu.be/2jeBuHVSoOc?t=20
https://youtu.be/8t_8EbsbyCs?t=55
https://youtu.be/Ck86p9GYrx0?t=14
https://fox4kc.com/news/suspects-in-murder-of-shes-a-pistol-store-hear-evidence-against-them/
https://x.com/stopH8zone/status/562818578093998081
https://youtu.be/NPg66FRwDHg?t=69
https://youtu.be/bFOXllbA0NU?t=8
https://youtu.be/VBzyuD70UKE?t=6
https://youtu.be/OVFp8GdQrJU?t=35
https://youtu.be/Am4SIjmsaeY?t=56
https://youtu.be/iW23vUsp_7o?t=14
https://youtu.be/mgy6ROkMmYg?t=49
https://youtu.be/jXyeL89nkd8?t=113
https://youtu.be/AYOOiQAwJ6o?t=22
https://youtu.be/isU63FchbJU?t=38
https://youtu.be/1SyWVk3-hC0?t=13
https://youtu.be/tSUaLGYuzwM?t=32
https://youtu.be/Q3dfo7JL8Ts?t=36
https://youtu.be/17wAvV1AmKY
https://youtu.be/G8hmqN-PTuA?t=18
https://www.kmbc.com/article/gun-store-shooting-suspect-appears-ready-for-guilty-plea/3689720
https://kansaspublicradio.org/local-news/2015-04-20/charges-added-in-killing-of-kansas-gun-store-owner
https://www.kmbc.com/article/third-suspect-sentenced-in-shes-a-pistol-murder-case/19637179
https://www.kmbc.com/article/suspect-in-shes-a-pistol-shooting-pleads-guilty-to-murder-of-store-owner-jon-bieke14429236
https://x.com/kmbc/status/941093144682119169
https://x.com/MollyRoseTV/status/554421891406905344
https://x.com/shawneedispatch/status/676416336768069632
https://x.com/KSHB41/status/625807389304844288
Surveillance Video
https://youtu.be/VnYW3wof3qk
https://youtu.be/w6ZpmAhaxv4?t=35
https://gofund.me/9cce6d55
https://youtu.be/Pt1QSyrjr7s
https://youtu.be/pxf6zCPhxWE
https://youtu.be/Bf8gqSFI1f8?t=90
https://youtu.be/7ehiB87wkAs?t=29
https://youtu.be/m5yzB56WGLo?t=41
https://youtu.be/o64qkfQIzas?t=6
https://youtu.be/PQYbG8qbACg?t=32
https://youtu.be/F02fujzY1Zg?t=52
https://youtu.be/PdLm4v9f59U?t=8
https://youtu.be/tRQMJCh1ZMY?t=6
https://youtu.be/IWISKtHD6PA?t=60
https://youtu.be/xas5S7G8dYE?t=56
https://youtu.be/uEJEmgwmFG8?t=5
https://youtu.be/jXyeL89nkd8?t=50
https://youtu.be/3ach0EwNZvY?t=11
https://www.facebook.com/ShesAPistolLLC/
https://www.legacy.com/us/obituaries/kansascity/name/jon-bieker-obituary?id=4171687
https://gunmemorial.org/2015/01/09/jon-bieker
https://www.amosfamily.com/obituary/Jon-Bieker
https://x.com/EmilyRittman/status/979487960268771329
https://x.com/_HaleyHarrison/status/555883581910687745
https://x.com/BrianKMBC/status/556586325277564928
https://x.com/jenkers_en/status/626192421790027780
https://youtu.be/Z2L6RGKNlEA
https://youtu.be/Rc-uBvFGWfs
https://youtu.be/vUb05mQ7VGM
https://youtu.be/ILS8Ccz2LRg
https://youtu.be/iihLrfKrl5I
https://youtu.be/DGo4rnl-Jdg
https://youtu.be/c2H0MDwOPQU
https://youtu.be/igdZXOakepc
https://youtu.be/SrpLljwXWTA
https://youtu.be/d_L54Dm3PC4
https://youtu.be/sQ5e-gZidXo
submitted by HashTagFinallyWoke to Justice4Victims [link] [comments]

2024.05.23 12:09 No_Cauliflower3639 BakedBeans Unveiling the Legacy of Baked Beans: A Resilient Journey in the Crypto World BSC

Unveiling the Legacy of Baked Beans: A Resilient Journey in the Crypto World
In the fast-paced realm of cryptocurrency, projects often come and go, leaving behind a trail of successes or failures. However, there are some exceptional stories that stand the test of time, and one such tale is that of Baked Beans. Established in November 2021 by the visionary Kratos, Baked Beans swiftly rose to prominence, achieving the highest Total Value Locked (TVL) record of 35,560 BNB. Despite enduring the trials of a bear market, this project persevered for over a year, leaving an indelible mark on the crypto landscape.
The original Baked Beans miner was launched amidst the euphoria of a bull market's peak, defying the odds to operate for more than a year. However, as the bear market took its toll, the need for adaptation became evident. Thus, Baked Beans Reloaded emerged at the dawn of another bull market, equipped with an improved contract and bolstered marketing strategies. Let's delve deeper into the evolution of Baked Beans and explore the innovations brought forth by Baked Beans Reloaded. Diving into Baked Beans Reloaded: Enhancements and Innovations Baked Beans Reloaded introduces several enhancements compared to its predecessor. The improved contract ensures greater security and efficiency, mitigating risks and enhancing user experience. Moreover, the revamped marketing approach ensures widespread visibility, engaging audiences across various languages and platforms. From influential endorsements to extensive press coverage, Baked Beans Reloaded leaves no stone unturned in its quest for longevity and success. Audited by both Certik and CryptoPrim, with Certik KYC verification, Baked Beans Reloaded prioritizes transparency and security. Investors can rest assured knowing that their assets are safeguarded by rigorous audits and compliance measures. Furthermore, the project's commitment to continuous improvement is reflected in its non-stop marketing efforts and extensive media presence.
The Heart of the Ecosystem: The Baked Beans Miner At the core of the Baked Beans ecosystem lies the Baked Beans Miner, serving as the nucleus of its operations. Revenue generated from other ecosystem wings is directly injected into the TVL of the miner, reaffirming its central role. Moreover, the fresh launched BAKED token introduces a revolutionary revenue-generation mechanism, with taxes at 2/2% on buys and sells. This innovative approach ensures sustainability and growth for the miner, paving the way for a prosperous future.
Unveiling $BAKED: Empowering the Ecosystem BAKED emerges as a pivotal component of the Baked Beans ecosystem, offering a currency for the Web3 Casino while fostering sustainability for the miner. With an initial market cap of $142,680, BAKED is poised for success in the crypto market. The upcoming launch of the Web3 Casino on June 1st, 2024, further solidifies BAKED tokens utility, with two foundation games ready for play.
Looking Ahead: A Bright Future for Baked Beans As Baked Beans continues its journey, fueled by innovation and resilience, the future appears promising. With CEX listings on the horizon and a robust marketing campaign underway, Baked Beans is poised to reach new heights of success. The absence of team tokens for BAKED underscores the project's commitment to fairness and decentralization.
In conclusion, Baked Beans epitomizes the spirit of perseverance and innovation in the ever-evolving crypto landscape. With a steadfast focus on sustainability and growth, Baked Beans and its ecosystem are primed for a future filled with prosperity and success.

Social Media:
• TG: @ bakedbeansreloaded
• WebSite: https://bakedbeans.app/
• Twitter: https://twitter.com/BB_Reloaded
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bakedbeansreloaded
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61557585436770
• Medium: https://medium.com/@bakedbeanscrypto
• LinkTr: https://linktr.ee/bakedbeansreloaded
submitted by No_Cauliflower3639 to CryptoMoonShots [link] [comments]

2024.05.22 16:51 LeeBee3030 Husband refuses to apologize or take accountability for mistakes

So my husband has a huge problem with taking accountability for his actions (or inaction rather…). Let me preface this by saying that he is a good dad. He loves playing with the kids and he plays with them often. However, our marriage is terrible. We have been married for 10 years and we have two young kids.
Before kids, a lot of our fights were often a result of his alcoholism. He is not a fun drunk, he gets annoying and unreasonable and can’t stop drinking once he starts. The two weddings we have attended as guests over the past few years have ended with him getting blackout drunk and leaving the hotel room once we got back so he could go find a bar and continue drinking. He still drinks just about every night and just stays up watching Facebook reels. He doesn’t drink heavily in his opinion, maybe a 6 pack, but he drinks and he stays up late most nights.
He also has sleep apnea, for which he finally got a C-PAP machine. But since he stays up late drinking and doesn’t get enough sleep. The sleep machine is not a magic solution that gives you quality sleep just because you use it, you still have to get enough sleep while using it and he doesn’t seem to understand this. I’m usually left to do the morning routine with the kids alone. It’s hard because they fight me every.step.of.the.way and one goes to daycare and the other gets on the school bus, so I have two separate drop offs to do alone. He was doing okay for a little while and taking one kid to the bus stop while I took the other kid, but this week that has stopped. He usually sleeps through the morning while I’m doing this routine unless I wake him up, which is not my responsibility. When I do wake him up out of desperation, he often yells at me that he’s awake (don’t need you awake, I need you up and moving) or he wakes up and falls right back to sleep. I have a full time job making more money than he does and I am late for work every day because of how long the routine takes with just one person doing it. Luckily I work from home so I have some flexibility.
He sleeps constantly, at his desk at work, on the weekends, whenever he can. This past weekend, he rolled out of bed at 11am, fixed himself breakfast, left the dirty plate on the table, and went back to sleep on the couch. I had not eaten at all and I was making morning snack for my kids when he came down. I asked him “do you feel…any sense of shame sleeping so late and then going back to sleep while I’m handling the kids?” He answered “no” and went back to sleep.
He is also incredibly messy. I am almost certain he has undiagnosed ADHD, but he refuses to get treatment for it. So I’m mostly in charge of dishes, laundry, taking out trash, general cleaning, groceries, cooking, etc. He will step in with making the kids dinner every once in a while and the dishes when he’s feeling guilty, but he is not consistently helping and I often have to bring things to his attention that need to be done. The lawn needs to be mowed and there’s poison ivy taking over our rose bushes and he won’t do anything about it unless I mention it to him. He also blames me and the kids when he misplaces things. He misplaces things OFTEN and gets incredibly angry about it. He usually finds the items where he left them.
For as long as I can remember, when he has done something bad, I am the one who has to bring it up and prod him towards an apology. It spirals into him bringing up irrelevant things like my anger (which I think is justified), or empty phrases like “every time I try to make you happy, it doesn’t matter so I just give up”. I ask him what he has done to make me happy and he can never answer. I assume he’s talking about the few times he does the dishes without being asked, but those are things he should be doing for the household just like I’m doing. He gets unreasonably angry and all logic goes out the window when I’m trying to discuss issues with him. Then finally a half-assed, no eye contact, apology OR he just starts randomly helping around the house for a day or two before returning to his former behavior.
At this point, I have given him separation papers multiple times. We are basically roommates at this point who are just staying together for the kids, but I can’t take being married to someone who is so unreasonable and shameless anymore. I am in a separate bedroom now and not speaking to him unless it’s about something that involves the kids. He acts like he has no idea why I’m doing this and has even told his family that I’m not speaking to him without mentioning anything about why. He even told one of his family members that he thought I might have turned his sleep machine off in the middle of the night so that his apnea would kill him. This was while I was sleeping in a separate room. He has forgotten to turn the machine on a few times before so…that’s what happened…
There was one particular, noteworthy, fight about a week ago that prompted me to cease verbal communication with him. He knows he was in the wrong, but absolutely refuses to acknowledge it. I have mentioned many times before that all I’m looking for is acknowledgement and changed behavior, but he will not give me that. He would do that for his employer and his kids, but not for me.
I gave him separation papers again earlier this week and he has ignored them. I texted him about them and offered to discuss what we want to include in the separation papers and he just went off on a rant about a lot of irrelevant things and how he knows I hate him. He seems to think me “hating him” is worse than the reasons I dislike him. He will not acknowledge his faults that contributed to me not liking him. It’s the dislike itself that he thinks is wrong and that he thinks justifies treating me badly and ignoring his responsibilities (I hope that makes sense, it’s a circle of hate that he thinks is a line that started with me hating him).
I don’t want to get an attorney or go to court because I would like to keep separation as low-drama as possible. I would love to be able to work things out, but he is not interested in therapy because he does not feel he has done anything wrong. We have tried it before and he acted like he had no idea what our problems were. He thinks he’s just a guy who has made some mistakes, but for me there’s something fundamentally wrong with the way he handles his mistakes and he never changes his behavior after those mistakes. I could go on and on, but this is already way too long.
Has anyone experienced this before in their marriage? Anyone found a way to resolve it outside of therapy?
TLDR: Sleepy husband slacking in household duties and occasionally parenting duties. Lashes out when I confront him about it. Leaves me to take care of most things. Refuses to sign separation papers.
submitted by LeeBee3030 to Marriage [link] [comments]

2024.05.22 15:17 dizzykhajit New people, please seriously research the industry before getting involved in it.

It's 2024 and medical coding just can't shake this reputation that it's an easy way to make BEAUCOUP bucks sitting at home doing nothing. In the vast majority of experiences, it requires undivided concentration. It can take years and several job-adjacent roles to break into. And from there, years still to land remote. Are there outliers to all of these? Yes. Are they the exception? Yes.
There is post after post after post of this same sentiment, "I'm bored," "I can't find a job," or even more infuriating "WhY wAs I LiEd tO?!" I personally am really tired of reading the many sob stories that can be boiled down to people's total lack of responsibility for their choices in life. My guys, it takes very little effort to find some truths and calculate your probability of a similar outcome, because those posts make up the majority of this sub. Why people in 2024, with all the information at their fingertips, continue to choose to stick their head in the sand and throw money at false promises without first thinking that maaaybe it'd be a good idea to dig a little deeper into such an expensive commitment, I will never, ever understand your lack of caution and personal accountability.
Nobody is forcing you to pull out your wallet and get into medical coding, or for that matter any industry where you could have the same gripe of sunk cost. Money rules the world - so of course any agency that can sell you on the idea of a quick and easy payday will, because at the end of the day they owe you nothing - they are a business trying to make money off your impulses. They need you to want their courses and books and memberships. Please don't be so naive to blindly believe that any entity with dollar bills attached has your best interests in mind.
New people, you have an obligation to yourself and your future to research and be aware of the risks your ventures may have. This is nobody else's responsibility but your own. Yes, you may decide that coding is not for you once you're in the thick of it, but at least you can't surprise Pikachu face that you were blindsided about it.
Good luck and Godspeed.
Edited for part 2 of this PSA: We do not have the gift of foresight here, so regardless of even the very best Scooby-Doo rundown of your quasi-relevant experience, existing knowledge and life expectancy, we have zero insight as to your likelihood of success and even less as to how long it will take you to achieve it. If you don't have a clue despite knowing yourself, your quirks and your commitment to resolve, neither will we. Look for similarities in the 100s of posts that are already here.
Edited part 3: The How. Someone asked this in a comment and it should be a part of the rant. My B. Sorry for shit formatting too, it's not a wall of text in edit mode I did the best I could to break it up and make it palatable, but yanno, phones. And while I'm happy to spell this out if it cuts down on repeat posts, to be honest y'all, most of this advice on how to do thorough research is not a super secret Medical Coding Skill. It's a Basic Adulting Skill that can be applied to pretty much any and all facets of life prior to engagement.
Research all the different types of medical coding that exist. Surgical, E/M, outpatient, inpatient, facility, hospitalist, ancillary (laboratory/pathology, radiology). These might overlap in your work depending on role. Research what certifications apply to which. Your certification may bind you to one or more and yet may not guarantee you get the one you want. Research that, too.
Look up every accrediting agency involved to get an idea of types of certifications and their time/money investment. Both short-term to get started and long-term to maintain and stay current. Courses, exams, initial and annual books, initial and annual CEUs, initial and annual memberships. Watch pricing of these elements, compare over time to themselves and to each other. AAPC is ALWAYS having some urgent sale about to end. They are hoping you get FOMO anxiety and impulse buy. The reality is they only have like 2 legitimate sales a year, and they are only a couple weeks each. If the discount says it ends at the end of the month, it'll be there next month. Don't buy the lie. Local and online colleges vs AAPC direct vs AHIMA direct. 2 year degrees vs 4 year degrees vs stand-alone certifications. Find out EXACTLY what is included in your packages.
Go look at job postings (yes, before you even put a dime into this!) and actually monitor them for a while. LinkedIn, Indeed, hospital/clinic websites. Stay away from Craigslist, it's all scams at this point. Compare preferred/required qualifications (experience, prereqs and certs) for your desired role vs adjacent roles to see what all you'll need. It's damn near an industry standard at this point for employers to want 3 years of experience. This is where your adjacent roles of reception, billing, preauth, and ins verification come in. Check those postings and prereqs, too. Keep running it back until you find a pattern of where you would be realistically starting. Pay special attention to wages and locations, both nearby and remote, the frequency in which individual postings appear and disappear (and reappear...), and, most importantly, general vacancy. Watch how many people apply to them. Don't look once and think you have a pulse on the market - you might go back 2 months later and see only the exact same postings. All of this information is the best tell of the health of the industry; the only downside is it does not project X amount of time into the future when you will be joining the fray. So keep an eye on it! If you can, get in the habit of watching updates for a couple days consecutively, repeat this weekly. Also valid if you already have an existing coding job and are thinking about a different role. Being one of the first resumes on a posting is infinitely better than being the 380th. (This is not an exaggeration. I once applied to a United Healthcare posting accepting CPC-As for a single position where LinkedIn stopped counting at 1000+ applicants. This only took about a week.)
Find non-monetized social forums with real people speaking freely. Facebook, Reddit, Discord. Even reach out to your local chapter if you have a way in and ask to speak to some members. Avoid influencers, they are helpful for studying purposes but at the end of the day they are making a name for themselves and will eventually sell out to sponsors to do it (see fucking Tiktok. Refer back in my post about selling pipe dreams.) Search those forums for every question, buzzword or scenario that has ever crossed your mind about the industry. Listen, everybody wants to hear about the best case scenarios. Be real with yourself. If this is something you honestly want to do, you owe it to yourself to hear the good AND the bad. Pattern recognition is a required skill in this field, and in this part of the research you will find far more donkeys than unicorns. Ask yourself why an influencer would want you to only look at less than half of the picture. How is keeping you in rose-colored glasses helping you make responsible choices in life? It's not. There is value in seeing multiple perspectives. If you choose not to explore this side of the house knowing it exists, then you are only lying to yourself when you cry "I was lied to!" If your psyche is so fragile that you need everything to be dripping with sweetness lest you mistaken reality for cruelty, and anything raw makes you scream offense and screech loudly at everyone within earshot instead of having enough of a backbone to process those uncomfortable feelings and use them to your advantage, you are going to have a very, very tough time in life in general. Whether you like it or not, the world does not cater to that brand of immaturity, and it will not do you any favors. Puff out your chest, take a deep breath, ready yourself, and look behind the curtain. You'll be okay, I promise. Future you will thank brave you no matter the context.
Ask yourself if you have the personality for medical coding, and if not, at least the resolve to work beyond your deficits. If you've ever learned another language for funsies, actually read the fine print on anything, or noticed immediately when the smallest knickknack has been moved out of place in your house, you already have some solid traits needed for the job. Do you like puzzles? Do you like following rules and knowing exactly when you can break them? Do you have an affinity for anything medical? Do you enjoy digging into scholarly articles? Do you find comfort and/or satisfaction in methodology? Or does all that sound super cringy and make you wanna call me a nerd? Do you get impatient quickly? Do you get bored? Are you easily distracted? Do you easily give up? Can you overcome any of this? Are you willing to grind, or do you require instant gratification? What's your backup plan with your investment? Did you research adjacent positions?
Swallow some really, really, really hard truths. The industry is oversaturated. Because of this, every employer can ask for years of experience while very few want to give it. Because of this, anyone will take the first thing that's offered. Because of this, wages are going down. Because of this, turnover is going up. Because of this, quality in leadership and training is going down. A mouse was given a cookie, and now, enshittification ensues. Getting flex work is lucky. Getting remote work is luckier. Getting both will likely require years-long bloody battles against war-hardened veterans, most of whom still lose out to better resumes or nepotism. Is it worth it? Yes. Is it easy? Fuck no. A lot of people give up before they get their first job and just let everything lapse. Why do you want everyone to keep this from you and just assure you it won't take long at all? This is the world we currently find ourselves in. It sucks for all of us.
Do all of this research, abstract it together to decide what direction you might want to go in, then do it all again. Several times, as many times as you can. Do not ever actually make a shotgun decision. Look hard into it, make pro/con lists for yourself. Get your head out of the clouds and stop picturing your dream job for a few minutes, and imagine instead your absolute worst case scenario (job doesn't check every box, can't find a job at all). Would you be okay with it for a while? How will you fill the gap in the interim, if at all? How will you keep your knowledge current while you are not practicing? Now quick, make a preliminary decision off the knowledge you have right that moment. Write it down. Walk away for a while. Reapproach days, weeks, months later. Do all your research all over again. Has anything changed? Anything new influencing your plan? Do you still feel the same about your decision?
I did this over and over and over for a solid year before saying "let's fuckin go," buying my course and pursuing my path, and STILL felt extreme frustration and helplessness at times in my journey. I obtained my certification (which wasn't taken seriously at my place of employment) and I was suffocating in a toxic job, either waiting for my experience to meet the minimums that legitimate employers wanted, or waiting to drop dead from the stress and anxiety, whichever came first. If I had gone into this blindly, I would have given up right fucking here. Instead, already knowing this was the hard part of the story I had read about and not the end of it gave me strength to keep pushing forward. This is why I am telling y'all the truth. Every single one of us who got here has a story. The struggle is unfortunate but likely inevitable. You either keep at it, or you move on. Nothing anyone says here will be able to make that decision for you.
You want to be a medical coder? Come on in, but know what lies ahead. You get out of this industry what you are willing to put into it. As I keep saying over and over again...is it worth it? Totally, if you can stick it out to the finish line. All of it can be done. But too many introductions into the coding world glamorize it, and every single one of these entities is doing you a disservice by convincing you it's cheap and quick and easy. You deserve to hear it laid out there for you. But hey, apparently I'm just a bully, so don't take my word for it. Like I said in another comment: "Keep doing research, and if it's a common theme by people who have nothing to gain from it, it's probably the truth."
TL;DR: You shouldn't be a medical coder if you can't be assed to read any of the above. There are patient charts longer and more convoluted than the above you'll have to read and interpret.
Edit 4: minor corrections/additions for clarity and u/macarenamobster (thanks again!)
submitted by dizzykhajit to MedicalCoding [link] [comments]

2024.05.22 13:56 BadgerCom I (M29) have been single for long time ( 7 years ) and now in relationship. Need help understanding what my girlfriend (F33) wants? How we can communicate better? How to be a an awesome boyfriend to her?

Hi Reddit, figured to ask for some relationship advice here as it helps me to write things out and talk about them.
I've sent a number of letters to a friend asking for advice, and I will mostly re-share them here. So if the format is a bit confusing, just understand this conversation is my side of asking for advice from a trusted friend over the course of a few months. She's not very available right now and so I figured maybe I can ask reddit for some opinions and see what folks with more relationship experience can help me with. This is an Alt account because my GF uses reddit and until I can figure out my own thought I want to keep some privacy and only bring things up with her when I'm ready.
For some quick introduction, ill refer to my girlfirend as K. We met about 6 months ago and fell for eachother hard. I invited her to do a road trip with me, since I live in a converted bus and have traveled the US for about 4 years. She had never been outside of NC and I though a roadtrip would be exciting for her. We spent 3 weeks traveling together out in the west, after which I asked her to be my girlfriend. She was totally excited about it. She returned to NC for a while, but joined me for another road trip which went on for about 2 months together. We travel together well and she is an awesome companion.
After the road trip was over I needed to start a job because I was running out of money. She returned to NC and was just really gloomy and unhappy a lot of the time. We missed eachother. She said she was going to sell all her stuff and move out to Utah where I am working. In her car, she never asked to live with me, nor implied that she would be living with me. Her plan was to live out of her car.
I extended an offer for her to officially move in with me in my home ( the bus ). There are obvious challenges to this like space, but she really doesn't have hardly any belongings and is very minimalist. Same as myself. I think we can make it work but sure there is a bit of a challenge moving in together to a small space, neither of us it too worried about that but I though I'd mention it.
About me (29 M)
Immigrant from Ukraine ( immigrated early 2000's)
Electrical engineer by trade, but I take work when I need money and have been mostly on a work for 1-2 years travel for 1-2years type thing.
Very outdoorsy and adventurous.
live in a converted school bus i built and have traveled most of North America with, Canada and mexico included.
Rather spontaneous
very outgoing / extroverted
Type 7 enneagram ( if your inter personality types )
Had 2 serious relationships when I was 19-21, got lied too, manipulated, and used in a way that i struggled to get over for a long time. Decided relationships with girls weren't for me and im happy being alone and doing my own thing. Had a few flings/ hookups over the 7 years I was single but never really enjoyed it due to lack of intimacy. Eventually felt lonely and decided to turn my attitude around and look for a serious gf.
I have had a fear ( from previous relationship experience) that I'll be used, manipulated again, and eventually abandoned. I feel like it's been the reason I havent trusted anyone to get close enough again. This is something I realized years ago and have worked on deeply to change. This relationship with K is the first one since I felt comfortable enough that I can see a different perspective than the negative one I adopted for years.
About her
K ( 33F)
Lived in small town in NC her whole life, left the state once with an ex bf but returned to NC.
No college
Kinda outdoorsy but just doesn't have much experience besides car camping
wanted to convert her own school bus before i suggested for her to move in with me.
also rather spontaneous
Introverted and not outgoing, has a small friend circle. Mostly enjoys spending time with animals or her friends
Grew up with helicopter parent mother. Controlled everything for her and all her decisions. Father divorced at young age and she maintains contact but says their relationship isn't close. She says its hard to please her father or do anything right / good enough for him.
Has had way more relationship experience than me, including serious multi year relationships. ( most of her relationships have been with older men ( 5-10 years older than her), im the only person she's dated younger than her. )
Has significant self confidence issues and is constantly looking to me for validation that she's " doing things right" and that I approve of her.
Total cutie and I'm way attracted to her.
Type 2 Enneagram ( if you need a personality profile / summary )
So here is a VERY LONG list of thoughts, questions and conversation. If this post doesn't get may replies because it way too long I'll break it up into separate smaller posts over the week as I have time. I just want someone to read it and share their thoughts on any part of it that resonates with you or if you have been through similar situations before.

Thanks!

May 20th 2024
K has moved out to live with me in Hoodoo the bus. Out in Utah. I extended her an invitation because I wanted her to come and live with me. I recognize its rather soon / sudden, but she seemed kind of depressed and gloomy in North Carolina. I could tell she wanted an opportunity to leave a lot of things behind and that she had dreams of living on her own terms, freed from the constraints of her family, and free from the environment that she felt stuck in. Though it is really quite soon, and I had apprehensions about her moving out with me so soon, I overwhelmingly feel honored that she trusts me enough and feels safe moving such a long distance to be with me and that I get an opportunity to make such a big difference for her in her life.
But now that she is here, I feel some of those same apprehensions resurfacing, and thats what I want to write to you about.
Remember how I shared with you some of the concerns I had? The major ones being, Her lack of financial independence ( debt, zero savings, zeros in her checking account, shit credit score, and low paying job ). And her lack of friend network in the new area she is moving to.
I still feel like K is content with depending solely on me for social interaction. She doesn’t seem interested in activities that could introduce her to new people, even though she has moved to a new place and expects to stay here. I need to make sure I don't come across as pushy about this suject because it upsets her when I bring it up.
We discussed this clearly when we talked about her potentially moving here. I mentioned my concerns among other things that made me nervous about her move. If she doesn't make any friends here, I feel like I will be her only source of social contact, which she is fine with, but I am not. I don't feel comfortable in a situation where she lives with me in a new place without knowing anyone else or having a support network. I can fulfill this role for a while, but it will eventually become too burdensome. Our relationship would be much healthier if she had her own friends and social circles, just as I do.
I want to support her in meeting new friends and hope she introduces me to them. Similarly, I want to introduce her to my friends, which I did during my motorcycle trip to Moab.
While I was in Moab, Matt commented that K is not who he expected me to be with; he had heard me talking to him about K and thought she would be more outgoing, extroverted, and adventurous. K has expressed similar feelings of inadequacy, saying she isn’t as active or outgoing as I am. I always tell her I love her for who she is and that I appreciate her spirit and desire to become more adventurous, it's what matters to me. I feel lucky to share these adventures with her and introduce her to new experiences, which she values and understands bring me more joy than doing them alone. But after Matt’s comment, I wonder if he's right and if we are incompatible in this way. If that’s the case, what should I do? How can I accept this without feeling limited or confined by potentially having to choose between spending time with my friends and making K feel left out?
I suggested she join a local Facebook group called Utah Adventure Girls, which does outdoor yoga, all-girls hikes, and other activities that seem appealing. However, it’s difficult to tell if she’s interested, and she seemed upset when I asked if she had joined the group, I asked about three times over a week, is this too much / too often? I also suggested she visit the library since she loves reading and to also hang out at the local cafe / coffee shop since I see a lot of girls there. That was an even worse suggestion because all she heard was the part about how, "I see a lot of girls there" and not about the context that I felt like it would be somewhere she could meet people, not me.
I've considered introducing her to some girls I know who enjoy outdoor activities. My idea was to message them and say, "Hey, my girlfriend K is new to the area and would love someone to explore and adventure with. Can I share your number with her?" Do you think this approach is okay, or could it backfire? I realize K may not want to make new friends here and prefers to do everything with me. While this is fine for now, I fear that it won't lead to a healthy relationship if she remains this dependent on me for social contact.
You’ve asked about our goals in this relationship. A major goal for me is to help K build her confidence. My approach might not be the only way, and so I seek other suggestions. Other aspects of her life are helping her gain confidence, so maybe this can come later. Moving here was a big step for her, and she has gotten her motorcycle license and is learning to ride off-road. She is also improving in communicating her wants and needs to me which really started out difficult. I often felt like we were only doing things that I wanted to do and she was just agreeing with me because she's just learned she needs to be agreeable at all costs. This has gotten better for sure.
However, I still struggle to understand what she wants, and when I guess wrong, she gets upset. Recently, I discovered that her car won’t go over 80 mph and has Ford MyKey features that limit its functionality. These features, intended for teenage drivers. Her mother bought the car and registered it in her name, which limits K independence. This situation highlights the broader issue of her lack of confidence and independence. It hurts that my attempts to help often make her feel inadequate or like she’s doing something wrong.
I believe my way of bringing things up or phrasing them might be why she reacts negatively, but I don’t know what I’m doing wrong or how to communicate better. This has been a big challenge, and I often avoid certain topics to prevent conflict, which leads to roadblocks in our communication.
There are three main things I feel I can’t discuss with K:
  1. Topics that might upset her because they make her feel inadequate or like she's failing me. ( I often just discover these the hard way and add them to a list of topics not to bring up with her )
  2. Offers to help her, which she might perceive as sacrifices on my part. For example, I offered to use my Gemini bankruptcy money to pay off her high-interest loans with no strings attached, but she declined, sharing stories of past experiences with her mother and an ex-boyfriend. She never explicitly said she didn’t want my help, but I assumed based on her stories. When I made this assumption, she got upset, saying I gave up too easily and needed to fight for her. This ambiguous communication is challenging for me.
  3. Stories involving other girls, which make her jealous. I have many female friends who share my interests, and I worry about how to handle situations where K might feel insecure around them.
We should discuss this more because I feel stuck and fear losing friends or hurting feelings if I can't handle this better.
Jan 2nd 2023
  • What are your major concerns for the relationship going forward?
Ok I actually wrote some of these out before....Here are K's concerns..
-being distant from me, and not feeling present in my life, not being able to care for or support me physically which she feels a need to do.
And then here are my concerns going forward
-Im into her because she is into me. And I don't often find girls that are this genuinely into me. It's actually almost too much but so far im ok with it. Thats not my real worry. My real worry is if another girl comes along that is as interested in me. I will handle such a situation by setting boundaries with whomever else may express interest in me and make it clear that I dont want to loose K by being anything more with them. But again my worry is that my attraction to her comes from the intense affection she shows towards me. She is very good at reading feelings and my reaction to them. My worry is what if I meet someone else who has the same effect on me? Would I fall for them as easily as I did for K? I don't know this is a hypothetical situation I don't know so I'm worried that I don't know
  • What strengths do you see in the relationship?
She is really into me. I guess I see that as a strength because I enjoy her affection and I feel like it gives me the freedom to be myself. If she wasn't as into me I would have trouble try hard to impress her or feel pressured to be someone other than myself in some ways. She is attached to the genuine me and the more I just let myself be the more she seems into it. That's totally awesome and I feel the same way towards her. She has been through way rougher relationships than I have, I hope that this gives the the wisdom and knowledge to recognize things that don't work for her and that maybe I'm more of what she is looking for. Also she can hopefully share those lessons with me rather than having to learn them the harder way that she already did. We both have a positive outlook on things. Especially our relationship, Shure it took off kinda quick and we are apart right now, but both is want it to succeed so I Believe that it will.I'll think of some more strengths.
  • What are your thoughts about long distance?
Honestly, my thoughts about long distance are rather negative. All my other relationships in the past have died out and I've attributed a big part of it to going long distance. I shared my relationship history with K and also mentioned that the long distance thing was why they didn't work out. My take away though was that I sucked at it and need to try harder to make up for the challenge of being long distance. I'll share with you some of my ideas how I can be better at this but im also open to ideas.
  • Where does a relationship fall in your priorities right now or in the next few years?
I would say it's very high on my priorities. I would rate it above my priority of having a job, and above my priority of having fun on my own adventures. I realized over the last few years that I can infact have my own fun and enjoy my own company. I wish to put myself out there in search of a relationship to be able to share my enthusiasm for life and cool adventures with someone else who appreciates that and appreciates me for sharing something profound like that with them. K certainly does. She said her trip with me was the most adventurous thing she has ever done and that we got to share the most memorable moments of her life so far. That's awesome and exactly why I want to make her a priority in my life. I could do the same things without her, but it's not bringing me the same joy as doing even basic adventures with her. She brings me the enthusiasm and and even greater level of it from simple things. To get the same joy as seeing her out on a 2 mile hike in a state park is like what I would get from trekking the highest peaks on another continent. I'll think about this some more. The rose tinted glasses are definitely on and I think they look good on me, I'll keep wearing them for now ;)
Dec 22nd 2023
I have been out of this element ( dating ) for so long that I can already see that we are headed for some struggles. I want to talk to you and Ryan about them, since you guys are my closest friends in a wonderful relationship and you two are a couple who's love for each other is inspirational to me. I've long thought that what you and Ryan have would never be attainable for myself, but I want to be more open minded to my future with K and I want to talk to you about how its going and how I can be the best boyfriend to her that I can be. Lets find a time to talk, if we can. It will have to be through Whatsapp or facebook messenger because I dont have service in most of the places we have been the last few weeks in Baja. I bum peoples Starlink in exchange for mechanical repairs to their camper or I trade starlink access for weed.
Some of the important things I can share so far about us are...She has adventurous spirit but not much adventurous pedigree. As in, I can sense in her the desire for adventure but she hasn't really done any genuine adventures or even been outside of North Carolina ( She moved to Tennessee with an ex boyfriend a few years ago but besides that has not been outside of the state of NC ever )She is super cute and I find her remarkably attractive. I tell her this often because, oh my god she is so fucking cute!
I first met her in maybe 2021 or 22 when I moved to oak grove, but I hardly saw her around there at the time and was also too occupied with my work to have seriously been available for dating. She works at a metaphysical shop and has her own private yoga instruction that hasn't quite grown to the level she wants it to be yet. She wants to convert her own bus and move into it. She already has a short bus that her dad owns and its practically converted. Our two and half week trip felt like an eternity, there was no time on our trip. It ceased to exist, it felt like we were on this journey forever. Neither of us had any problems or concerns in the outside world. It was a magical time for both of us and has been the highlight of my year.
K and I read through the Ennegaram book and the personality assessment. She scored about the same for type 2 and type 9. I can definitely see her as a helper (type 2). During the trip she wanted to always be making breakfast, cleaning some dishes, or doing some task to help me out in my bus. she did not like when I paid for things, like our MeowWolf tickets or drinks, even my own diesel fuel to drive the bus.
She is very self sacrificing, possibly to an extreme level as she puts others wants ahead of hers and a lot of the time I couldn't even tell what her opinion was on things. Some examples were simple things like, do you want to go on a hike or read a book? Do you want food now or later? She also seemed to be totally willing to go along with my ideas or my suggestions, like every single time. She is very sensitive to feeling loved and needs to feel intimate. This is awesome because I love cuddling and she is very cuddly and wants to be close to me whenever we are doing anything. I like the intimacy I get from her and I feel so warm and safe and that everything in my life is alright as long as she is by my side.
But she also has a bit of people pleasing vibes at times where it felt unnecessary for her to be like that ( as in i was already pleased with what we are doing or how things are, but she was visibly still "trying" to somehow make me more pleased ?? I dont know if that makes any sense... )Our communication is strenuous. Part of it is what I just shared with you. She is very difficult to get an opinion out of and so I can't tell if what we are doing or what I have planned is what she actually wants to be doing or if she is just going along with it because she wants me to be pleased that what we're doing is what I wanted to be doing. It does leave me at the end of the day unsure if I learned anything new about her because she never really expressed any clear desires or disagreement with any of the options, she only ever agrees. She has expressed that this " agreeableness" was part of how she was brought up to be a manageable and well behaved child. By being agreeable she never was the source of a conflict. Anyway, I could go on about this more but I think you get the idea. I have talked to her about how I have the sense that our communication styles are not meshing up and that I am struggling to communicate clearly with her. When I brought this up it bothered her because she felt like she was doing something wrong. I just figured we are new to each other and I expect this will take some time to get used to and fort us to both figure eachother out.
That leads me into the next thing....She is very sensitive to "feeling like she is doing something wrong". I have noticed I need to be particular with how I express things to her because I don't want her to feel like she is doing something wrong but she is constantly on edge and anxious that she may be doing something wrong and that what she is doing might make me not like her. I don't really know how to handle this because, but guess what, its getting in the way of our communication that I have to constantly think about how to express things to her. Even telling her this made her feel like she is doing something wrong by assuming that she is doing something wrong ( facepalm ). Frankly this is something she needs to work on within herself but I want to help her through that. So far what i'm doing is trying to kind of watch my phrasing so that im not coming across as critical or judgmental, which I feel like Im normally nor very critical or judgmental but I have to watch it extra closely when communicating with her. And then I follow it up with some praise or expression of affection and appreciation. This works ok but the ratio of critical to affection has to be like 1:10 otherwise she still feels like she is doing something wrong and I won't like her.
She has expressed that since our trip together was over she is having a very difficult time back in north carolina. Part of this is her living situation ( she's been basically couch surfing for close to a year and is living with the owner of the shop she works at. ) and her job situation which is that the shop I just mentioned is on the brink of closing down due to the slowing economy and not enough business. She does some of the online marketing for the shop and works in the store to fill in when the regular employees cant.
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2024.05.22 00:01 ikieneng My fanfiction - episode 4!

My fanfiction - episode 4!
The next part is here! This episode is so long that I had to split it, and today, you're finally getting part 3 of 3.
You can find the previous episodes in the side bar! (Community info page in the app)
DISCLAIMERS (the same ones as before)
The point of this fanfiction is not to be a straight-up continuation of events with the same themes, intensity, and tone. If you go into it with those expectations, you are probably not going to like it. Rather, it’s supposed to be how I wish things went if these events were real life. The resolution you want for a real-life situation isn’t often the right choice for a show, but it can be incredibly beautiful. Think of what you’re about to read to be a separate show then.
Episode 1 of this fanfiction begins after the episode “2:00” (season 2 episode 4), so it replaces the episode “Cake” and the ones that follow it. This fanfiction expects you to have seen the entirety of seasons 1 and 2, so you should watch those first.
I myself am bursting into the story here. The narrator and me are the same. While my character is like 95% real me, don’t take events about my life described here as facts. Some aspects of my life have been changed for the story. In my head, I started writing like an “alternate me” character in 2016, fulfilling a lot of the things that I wish I had in life, adding that to my story. I’m not really from Ukraine. I speak fluent Ukrainian as a foreign language, I started learning it in 2014, and I’ve talked to tons of people from there, but I’m not from Ukraine. I also don’t have as much money as I do in the story. I wish lmao.
If you want to post your own fanfiction, feel free to do so! To get your own post flair for your fanfic, and to appear in the side bar, please message me.

Part 3 (days 3 and 4)

We’d wake up on day three, and still, nothing would be any different - we’re still locked up. We’d both feel really worried not knowing if we’ll have to forfeit our whole plan because we might run out of food and water and take the risky route - calling the police and getting ourselves into a situation where we’d have to be freed by force, which would be so dangerous because the Turners have proven that there’s nothing they’re not prepared to do to us to “get Jericho back”. Leanne would ask me “What do we do if we call the police, and Mrs. Turner comes up here and tries to hurt us?” At first, I’d insist that we start thinking about that when we do run out of food the next day, but she’d insist we should come up with a plan. I’d point at the corner on the edge of the attic facing Spruce Street, the corner that’s to one’s right when coming up into the attic,
https://preview.redd.it/knoz0zwpou1d1.png?width=975&format=png&auto=webp&s=bd1694f292bb546ea45339ebecea7ffacfe33541
and say “Then you’d curl up and hide over there, and I’d take the radio, you’d take the metronome, and I’d sit down in front of you, shielding you, and if she gets in here before the cops do, we’ll defend ourselves. And we’d record everything on my phone. And we should probably hide behind the sofa. Maybe then, she might not notice we’re still up here at first. She’d probably be in a state of panic.” She’d look at me with sad, but touched eyes and just hug me and say thank you. I’d reply “Of course”. After some silence, I’d tell her “If anything happens to me… Please bring me back”.

She’d be touched by that, but say that if she reanimates me, the Church of Lesser Saints will come after ME as well because they’ll believe that I’ll be obligated to join. With a worried smile, I’d say “I know... But they’re probably already gonna do that, right? Because I won’t let them get to you!” We’d both nod with the same half-happy, half-worried expression. “And if things go terribly wrong and you have to bring me back, we can try again!”

I’d ask if I’m getting it right that the “great sins” they think she’s committing are not spending time with the Church and helping another family from the one that was assigned to her. She’d say yes and add that there’s a lot more they hate her for, like her “disobedient and rebellious streak”, disobeying their instructions, putting curses on people, and now, leaving the Marinos.
https://preview.redd.it/4obn4r9uou1d1.png?width=975&format=png&auto=webp&s=1e77adafbde221c320999ba1169adb0a1c6b2b17
After a few seconds of silence (out of shock that this is how the Church of Lesser Saints frames it), I’d be like “If you disobey so many of their instructions, then...”, look her directly in the eyes, and go “Good! Keep on disobeying them! I’m actually kind of stunned that this is how they frame your actions, because that is so manipulative. Wanting to have a life where you don’t have to worry about your every step being watched and controlled, where you can actually freely explore what you believe – not what they tell you to believe, but what YOU believe, where you can do totally normal human things like listen to music, and where you can go wherever you want and make some basic decisions for yourself and work wherever you want, that doesn’t make you...” (doing the “quote-on-quote” with my hands while I say it) “quote-on-quote ‘disobedient’ or ‘rebellious’, it makes you a normal human being. If they forbid every little thing that people do that makes you happy, if you then look for happiness elsewhere, that’s on them. You can’t take every bit of joy away from people and then expect them to just deal with it. You wanting to run away, that’s the logical result of their bullshit. And you didn’t ‘leave’ the Marinos, you were taken. Don’t let them think you’re at fault in any way!” She might have never heard any verbal confirmation before that her feelings about leaving are valid, and this would be so reassuring to her. She’d tell me that whenever she did things like not be there for meals at the Church, skip assemblies, or curse people without permission, she would be brought before May and the rest of the community, get questioned about her behavior, and she’d have to self-flagellate to receive forgiveness.
https://preview.redd.it/roex7c20pu1d1.png?width=975&format=png&auto=webp&s=32cecf94a41a97e66b1c74967cb074ca89321777
I’d go really still and quiet when she mentions the self-flagellation, which she’d then explain is a frequent punishment. That would freaking break my heart... I’d ask her when was the last time she hurt herself, and it was a little less than two weeks ago, before she was forced to leave the Turners. Very carefully and quietly, I’d ask her if it would be okay if she can show me her scars and add “You do NOT have to if you’re not comfortable, PLEASE don’t do it if you’re not”, and after a second, she’d nod and show me her back. My heart would break for her even more seeing her scars, I’d just express how horrible it is that they made her do that… I’d show her some of my cut wounds from when I self-harmed, which I hadn’t done in like three and a half years at that point. I’d want her to know that way that I get the urge, that I really do, but I’d tell her that hurting oneself achieves nothing. All it does is make you feel horrible mentally and physically, and every time you do it, there’s a risk of infection and even death. I’d just tell her I understand while taking her in my arms. I’d ask her to please look me in the eyes and tell me she won’t hurt herself again, and that when she feels like doing it again, to please talk to me first. She’d quietly say “I promise” while looking me in the eyes, and after some longer embraces, we’d both smile a bit, that would make me really happy to hear! I’d ask that when we’re out of here, if we can call a doctor sometime soon and get them to look at her scars to make sure none of them are infected, if she’s comfortable enough, and she’d nod and smile at me a little bit some more.

We’d eat after that. We’d run out of tomato soup that meal, and I’d tell her that when we’re getting out of there, I’d get her all the tomato soup in the world! “We’re gonna fill a whole hotel fridge with tomato soup!” “And with Ben & Jerry’s?”, she’d ask, and I’d say yes and say that we’re probably gonna need more than one fridge. I’d say we’re gonna pick the nicest and most expensive hotel to stay at, an idea that she’d love! “You still think Allentown is a good idea?”, I’d ask her, and she’d think my reasoning from the day before makes sense and say yes. We’d look for the nicest hotel in Allentown online and see that there are “only” three-star hotels in Allentown. Leanne would ask if getting such an expensive place to stay is really okay, and I’d say “Money is not an issue, don’t worry about it” while reaching across her back and like caressing her right shoulder, looking her in the eyes, and smiling. “And besides, let’s spoil you, you fucking deserve it after all this!” We wouldn’t book anything yet because we wouldn’t know when we can get out of there yet, but looking at all those insanely nice hotels would lift our spirits a bit.

After eating the first half of that day’s rations (only two half day’s rations would be left after that…), we’d think that it would probably be a good idea if we started writing the document for the police right now. Writing it can take hours upon hours, and there’s no point in delaying the rescue to write the document after I leave if we can do it right now, so we’d begin right that moment. It would begin something like “My name is Daria Horenko, born July 30, 1999 in Odesa, Ukraine, residing in 501 Pembroke Ave, Philadelphia 19050, Pennsylvania...” (I don’t live there. I have no idea who does. Please leave them alone lmao) “...I sent this statement to my Facebook friend Liam [...] (residing in Tipperary, Ireland, using Facebook as Liam [...]) as a PDF file and told him to call the Philadelphia police and read this statement to them if I don’t come back online and confirm that I’m okay by 10 PM Philadelphia time / 3 PM London, UK time on December 22, 2022. If he is reading this to you, it probably means that there was no sign of life from me by that time, and that I’m not safe, probably kidnapped and locked up by Dorothy Turner, Sean Turner, Julian (I’m not sure about his surname, but I’m referring to Dorothy Turner’s brother - redhead, not very tall, moderately overweight) in the attic of their residence at 9780 Spruce Street, Philadelphia 19139, Pennsylvania”, and then document everything I’ve seen in chronological order and everything that Leanne has told me, with a link to our video and photographic evidence, references to DNA evidence that can probably be found in the hole in the basement if they haven’t covered it up by now, and a statement at the end saying that I’ve written it together with Leanne to make sure that everything is correct. That would take a really long time, hours for sure. But when it’s done, I’d run spell- and grammar checks on it and send it to my printer at home, to be queued for printing when I get home and turn it on. We’d also know that today (December 21) or tomorrow will be the day when we leave one way or another, so I’d schedule a text message to 911 in 30 hours from that moment. The message would say “This is a scheduled message. If you’ve received it, then Leanne Grayson (born October 13, 2001)...” (We only ever learn Leanne’s birth year from the gravestone. October 13 is Nell Tiger Free’s birthday, so October 13, 2001 being Leanne’s birthday is kind of my headcanon)
https://preview.redd.it/0hr9niq1pu1d1.png?width=975&format=png&auto=webp&s=4dbead2015781ed8beee236188b8273aac1b3fb0
“...and me (Daria Horenko, born July 30, 1999) are probably not safe, abducted and locked up against our will by Dorothy Turner, her brother Julian, and Sean Turner in the attic of their house at 9780 Spruce Street, Philadelphia 19139, Pennsylvania or somewhere else on the property. We need help immediately. The Turners should be considered dangerous and very clearly willing to use violence and intimidation. We need help NOW. Details in our prepared statement: [the link]”. Because we’re holding out hope that we won’t have to call the police from inside the attic, the document would include information on what our plan is to get Leanne (and me) out of there as safely as possible and call the police from the taxi, but that if we run out of rations, we won’t have a choice but to call the police while we’re unarmed and while the Turners still have the upper hand.

We would debate whether we should include information about the Church of Lesser Saints right away or tell the police about them later because we know how that sounds, considering that this would hurt the credibility of our testimony,
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but we’d modify the document and include the most important information about them as well, with more believable explanations - how they forced Leanne and other members to self-harm (meaning that current members or those who recently left), where they’re currently operating from in Lancaster,
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that they faked their deaths, that they forced Leanne to leave the Turners, and the necessary lie that they took the real baby, and that Leanne hasn’t seen it since that day and doesn’t know where they’ve taken it. We’d also include names and stuff, and most importantly, reference the baptism tape and say that it shows May and George watching us from the sidewalk outside the church less than three weeks ago, and that piece of evidence would change everything in regards to investigating the Church of Lesser Saints and make the police believe us. We’d add that it’s probably among the other DVDs in the Turners’ living room, and that I’ll try to get it when leaving the building if our original plan is still going to be an option, rip the DVD at home, and add a link to the video file to the document. We’d modify the scheduled text message as well, and we’d charge both phones, mine first because the scheduled message is so important, but it’s an iPhone, so we could charge it to 100% rather quickly and then charge hers. And we’d add that we’d want the police to get Leanne’s things from the Marino estate. All her stuff being there would be further evidence that she was taken suddenly and against her will. We’d also add what number Leanne can be reached at for now with the Samsung Galaxy phone. And then, I’d send the document to Liam on all platforms where I know how to reach him, followed by a message to alert the authorities if I’m not back online confirming that we’re both okay in what’s now probably more like 29 hours, the phone number of the Philadelphia police, and caps at the beginning saying that it’s an actual emergency.

Out of nowhere, I’d ask her if she’s seen “Titanic” lmao, and with her near total isolation growing up, she wouldn’t have seen it. “I’ve only seen movies on TV”. I’d be like “I can show you lots of movies if you want! I got several subscriptions to streaming services, and also a bunch of stuff offline on an external drive at home.”
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Back on talking about “Titanic”, I’d tell her it’s wonderful and so freaking romantic, albeit over-the-top at times for sure and a bit overrated. It has that glossy feeling and some superficial characters to it that all James Cameron movies have, but it’s still really wonderful. After explaining the plot to her (since she’s grown up so isolated), I’d tell her about one scene that I’m thinking about a lot from time to time - near the end of the movie, when old Rose is done telling the researchers her story, she says that she doesn’t even have a picture of Jack, and that has hit me so hard from the first time I’ve seen the movie.
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She has no physical memories of him, she can never see his face again, and she can never show people what he looked like. That just rips my heart. I’d ask Leanne if we can take some pictures together. We’d look pretty horrible because we haven’t been able to shower in days, but we wouldn’t care and take them anyway and really, genuinely smile so hard. I’d send them to her email address (leanne_grayson@icloud.com, that email address is on her resume in the show),
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manually sync my gallery with iCloud, and I’d send them to Liam. I’d ask what phone she got back at the Marinos’ and if she’s got any pictures of herself in her iCloud gallery, but she’d tell me she’s rarely ever taken pictures of herself, only for the resume she applied at the Turners’ for, and I’d be like “Whaaaaat? But you’re so beautiful!”, and she’d smile hard, a bit embarrassed. I’d look her straight in the eyes and say it again and say that I mean it for real, she is so incredibly beautiful! It’s probably so rare that anyone’s ever said that to her in her entire life (her mother definitely didn’t, and given that the Church of Lesser Saints believes that anything that feels good is dangerous,
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it’s rather unlikely that they did), Tobe saying it in “Balloon” might even have been the only time ever…
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I’d then add “Inside AND out!”, and she’d smile some more in a bit of embarrassment and then look me in the eyes and say “You, too, Daria!”, and as you’d expect, I’d smile so hard and even with my eyes!

It would be rather late by then, so we’d eat and listen to some more music together from the Spotify playlist I created for her and talk so much about what we’re hearing.

After dinner, she’d bring the topic up on her own (this is kind of making fun of these fan theories) - she’d tell me that some in the Church of Lesser Saints think she’s the Devil or Lilith because of her rebelliousness, and how she’s inspired doubt in some people in the Church. I’d make such a weirded-out face. After realizing she’s serious, I’d say “If you are the Devil, then hail Satan! Like, seriously, if YOU are what God is threatening will happen if we don’t follow him, then that’s literally the weakest threat I’ve ever heard of. Then God is the villain here. We need more people like you in the world!” Shy as she still is, she’d still be almost embarrassed to hear this (she’s so not used to compliments), and I’d make it clear I’m serious, that I really think she’s fricking wonderful and the sweetest, and that she clearly has a huge heart full of so much love, and that she deserves so much better than what she’s ever experienced! Almost in denial, she’d see in my eyes that I really mean it and just smile and hug me, and then, we’d both smile even more! I’d rub her back a lot in that moment and promise her again that everything will be okay. “I’ll make sure of that!”

After some more music together, knowing that tomorrow will be the day we leave, no matter which plan we’ll go with, we’d make sure we haven’t forgotten anything. Looking around, I’d realize I have to give her my earphones with a cord because the internal mic of my Samsung Galaxy S5 Mini is essentially useless. I’d tell her that when I call her the next day to tell her it’s safe to come downstairs now, she should answer the call, plug in the earphones, and then, it will take a few seconds until I can hear her, but then, it should be fine. We’d set a code phrase that I’ll mention to let her know if the Turners got me and it’s NOT safe to come down. She’d suggest “tomato soup”, and I’d smile and say yes, that’s gonna be our code phrase. “And if it IS safe to come down?”, she’d ask, and I’d suggest “ice cream”.

I’d realize that we should probably find her fresh clothes in the attic and a coat right now, so as I said, it’s not too obvious that she’s been locked up for a long time the second she walks out of the door, because if she’s in dirty clothes or nightwear, with it being obvious that she hasn’t showered in days, and I get her out of there and into a taxi to drive off while I got a gun, it would look as if I was kidnapping her, so we’d find her a nice dress and coat up there, and I’d turn around and close my eyes while she puts it on, and when she’s done, I’d tell her again that she looks amazing! 😊
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And she’d smile and thank me this time, sort of the way she says it to the makeup artist at the street fair in S3E5 “Tiger” in that typical way of hers that’s so adorable for real,
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and she’d look in my direction and say “You look really beautiful, too!”, really shy, before peeking me in the eyes for a moment, and we’d just look at each other for a moment. “Can I have your pictures?”, she’d ask me, and I’d say yeah, open my iPhone, and select ALL pictures of myself in my gallery and send them to her email address, and send her those that are too large via a Google Drive link (iCloud isn’t great for sharing files lol), and then, I’d take her Samsung Galaxy S5 Mini, download them all (which would take a while because that phone is ancient), and set one of the pictures we’ve taken together as her wallpaper, and then set it as my wallpaper on my iPhone as well! 😊

We’d consider if there’s anything else we’ve missed. She’d mention that parts of the floor screech, especially one tile, so when I sneak out, I gotta be careful on the stairs, especially with that one tile.
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After a few seconds, she’d ask me if we wanna book a hotel now, and I’d smile and say sure! “Did you like any hotels in particular, out of the ones we looked at?” She’d say “The one with the big jacuzzi looks great” with big eyes and enthusiasm in her voice, like she does during some of her conversations with Tobe in S3E5 “Tiger”. “You’ve ever been in a jacuzzi?”, I’d ask her, and she’d go “Nooo, but I wanna try!” in the same tone,
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and so, after lying down now, we’d look up which hotel she was talking about and book a two-room suite in that hotel in Allentown for three weeks. I’d add “So we can easily look out for each other, and so you’ll also have some privacy.”, and she’d smile and nod, that consideration would probably mean a lot to her.

We’d then get ready for bed. For the next day, I’d get some better clothes as well and put them on while she’s turned around with her eyes closed. I’d take the last ration of food out of my backpack, put the clothes I just took off at the bottom of it, above Leanne’s Bible (the porcelain baby and card are already in one of the other pockets), and put my phone and the chargers in another pocket. I’d look around and ask her if there’s anything else I should take with me to safeguard, and at first, she’d also look around because she wouldn’t know how to answer right away, but she’d then point at Mrs. Barrington with her face,
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and I’d be like “Well, I think she’s a little too big for my backpack, but I can talk to the police when we’re out of here, maybe we can try to get her!”, and Leanne would nod with a big smile again.

We’d lie down on the mattress and share the covers again. Just like the night before, I’d lie down on the side of the mattress that’s closer to the stairs, in case Dorothy changes her mind and tries to assault Leanne again… On the mattress, she’d suddenly hug me really tight, break into tears, and thank me over and over again, and I’d just hold her tight, say “Of course”, and assure her that everything’s gonna be okay, that we’ll get out of there tomorrow. I’d wipe some of her tears off her face 🥺 On the mattress, we’d just look each other in the eyes and both just smile more and more, and after a minute or two, she’d kiss me on the lips for a tiiiiny moment and then, we’d just smile at each other even harder! She’d say “I’m not supposed to do that” while still smiling just as hard and looking me directly in the eyes! “Says who?”, I’d reply. She goes “My aunts and uncles”, and I’d say “I don’t think they’re a reliable source!”, and we’d kiss each other some more and longer, and both feel each other’s smile on our lips, and peek at each other a few times in between 😊🥰❤️ We’d both put our arms around each other before telling each other good night and before I promise her one more time it’s all going to be okay!
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At some point during the night, she’d wake me up, and when she does, I’d realize I had a nightmare, like, not from my night terrors, and she’d tell me I had a nightmare, that I was sniffling in my sleep, and that I told her two days earlier to wake me up if this happens. Still feeling terrible (the feeling of immediate dread always takes a while to subside for me), I’d thank her. I’d ask what I was saying, and she’d say that I wasn’t speaking English. I’d consider if I should tell her for a moment, but then, I’d take a deep breath, look up for a second, and with a heavy voice, slowly say “What if we try plan A tomorrow, and I fail? I’m scared… I don’t wanna mess this up… I don’t wanna fail you…” And she’d slowly look at me and just say two words: “You haven’t!” I’d look at her and almost laugh a bit out of joy. I’d smile and just cuddle up to her a bit, and she’d do it back. I’d say I’ll try to listen to music for a while to calm down because doing something else makes it much easier for me to zone out of the feeling of dread again. “Why only you?”, she’d ask. “I don’t wanna keep you awake”, I’d say, “You need the sleep”, and she’d say “It’s okay” and just smile a bit, and so, we’d listen to some music together for about half an hour.

I’d tell her that my sleep is so horrible (she’d say she can tell) because I don’t have my meds, and I’m really fricking looking forward to taking them again. Without them, the quality of my sleep is terrible, and it takes so long for me to fall asleep at all if I don’t take them. She’d ask if I’ve taken them for a long time, and I’d say that I haven’t taken these particular meds for long because whatever I take, my body builds up some resistance to them pretty quickly, so after a while, I always have to get new ones, but I’ve taken sleeping meds for years now. “It sounds like they’re really helping you, right?”, she’d ask, and I’d nod and say “Yeah, they really do. I’m also taking antidepressants, and they were an absolute gamechanger for me. It’s okay if I don’t take them for a few days because they don’t work in the moment, but they like rewire your brain over time, and they’re the best thing that’s ever happened to my mental health. Before I started taking them, it was so hard for me to avoid bad thoughts or resist them, like, it was hell, but ever since then, it got sooo much easier, and not letting things get to me or not letting bad things really take over me is just so much easier now.” After a while, I’d say “I was at a psychiatric clinic voluntarily for six months, but I also had nowhere else to go, and the doctors and employees really abused their power. They only intervened when there was physical violence, they didn’t intervene in any other conflicts, so because of them, the patients constantly bullied each other. My doctor switched to another department while I was there, so I got a new one, and the new one wasn’t perfect, but at least, she cared. I got really lucky to get a place at a living group for mentally ill people, which was when I could finally leave. But honestly, all my experiences with mental health professionals since then have been better. I went to a different clinic for four or five days voluntarily in 2019, and even they were far better. “That sounds scary…”, she’d say. I’d reply “It was. But things got much better after that. I had lots of setbacks, like, you know, but if you get help, it’s always better.”

After the current song’s over, we’d lie down to try and sleep again. We’d smile at each other again in bed, and I’d give her a short-ish kiss before saying good night, and we’d both smile even harder after that 😁 And we would fall asleep for good after a while (it would still take me longer than her).

In the morning, Leanne would wake me up again. She’d show me that the door is unlocked and open by a little bit now (they’re “letting” her out for a few hours…),
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and we’d both just embrace and chuckle in huge joy, as we can go with plan A now, the less risky one! We’d remember to quiet down after a few seconds and whisper from then on out. I’d go to the toilet roll, take eight pieces, rip them into two bands of four pieces each, and roll each of them up into a little bunch. I’d give them to her and tell her to put them into the wall pieces of the door when she gets out (so it looks like the door is closed while it can’t actually lock) and give me an audible signal when the third floor is clear, so I’ll get out with my backpack, take out the toilet paper, and hide in her room.
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“Is there anything you want me to get from there?”, I’d ask. “No. Everything is here or at the Marinos’.” I’d go “Okay” and move on - since I’m almost definitely unable to come down to the second floor right away (I’m using American English in all of these episodes. “First floor” in American English = “ground floor” in British English; “Second floor” in American English = “first floor” in British English; “Third floor” in American English = “second floor” in British English, etc.), she’d give me a signal when coming back upstairs. We’d agree that when she comes back upstairs, if it’s safe to go to the second floor, she’d shout something, maybe in conversation, maybe some sort of cry, doesn’t matter, and if not, she’d kick something. She’d be locked upstairs again after that, so I’ll have to tell when to get further downstairs myself, which I’d do as soon as I’ve heard absolutely no sounds from inside the house for at least a few minutes. On the first floor, I’d get the DVD from March 11, 2001, and if the baptism tape isn’t clearly labeled among the tapes, I’d unplug the DVD player from the TV, turn on the player, open the DVD slot, and if the tape isn’t in there, I’d take all unlabeled tapes. I’d then listen in on the basement door for a few seconds, and if I hear no sounds from down there, I’d quietly open the basement door and go downstairs, and if no one’s there, I’d get out through the side entrance down there, out through the back gate, walk back to Spruce Street, drive my bike home, take a shower, watch the tape from March 11, 2011 like she told me I could, hide it somewhere at home, print out the document for the police, take it with me in an envelope, print out a second version of it to give to the taxi driver, so I can say “If I’m not back in an hour, please call the police for me and read this to them”. I’d then call a taxi (a taxi with a large trunk whose driver is allowed to drive to Allentown and back), load my gun, and leave for the Turners’ and get Leanne.

We’d see that Liam has replied by now. Of course, he’d be super worried, but he’s got our backs for the plan, and that would be really reassuring. We’d look each other in the eyes, and then, I’d hug her sooo tight for several seconds, and we’d have one loooong kiss (hoping it’s not the last time we see each other…) before she goes downstairs while looking back at me on the way before putting the toilet paper in the door. I’d then put on my backpack. Once Leanne loudly shouts “Mister Turner?”, that would be my signal, and I’d hide in her room for about 45 minutes before she’s “let” back upstairs and shouts “You can lock me in now, Mrs. Turner”,
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which is when I’d sneak into the storage/guest room and wait. It would take like five hours until I hear nothing for a while, which is when I’d sneak onto the first floor, look around to make extra sure no one’s there, and go to the living room. I’d get the tape from March 11, 2011, and the baptism tape would be among the labeled DVDs, and I’d put it into the box of the March 11, 2011 tape (I’d put the original DVD loose in there and use the spot inside the box for the baptism tape because it’s probably more important. I then wouldn’t hear anything from the basement, so I’d slowly and quietly go down there. No one would be there, so I’d leave as planned and go home and take a shower. I’d watch the March 11, 2011 DVD. I’d be surprised to see the interaction between Leanne and Dorothy for sure, but sort of knowing her, I wouldn’t think anything bad of it. I’d actually get it because of my past celebrity crushes (which I know isn’t what she was feeling for Dorothy) and the desire to meet them, especially with Blanche. I’d get why Leanne wouldn’t want the police to see it, it would look bad for her. I’d wrap up the DVD in a thick piece of paper and tape it to the back of my closet, between the closet and the wall. I’d burn the piece of paper in the DVD case in my bathtub with a bucket of water next to me just in case. I’d test if the DVD of the baptism tape still works (it does), rip it, upload the video file to Google Drive, add it to the document for the police, cancel my printing queue, print the document (two versions of it. The one for the taxi driver would just have a short introduction at the beginning, like, that I’m the person who ordered the taxi), order the taxi, pack my things for the next couple of weeks and anything that Leanne might need, so I’d include any clothes that I think could fit her, and go to the taxi. I’d tell the driver to get me one block away from 9780 Spruce Street (which isn’t actually a real address, by the way) and wait there for me. Before leaving for the Turner house, I’d give him the envelope with his version of the letter for the police and tell him what I said I would tell him. I’d then get my backpack with the gun in it from my luggage in the trunk, and walk to the Turners’ house.

I have already "written" so much more in my head, but I've now reached the end of what I've actually written down, so it will take longer until the next episode is out now! Hope you've enjooooyed this one!
submitted by ikieneng to teamleanne [link] [comments]

2024.05.21 00:57 NonGamerGamerGirl My mother has psychosis so I’m thinking about cutting her off

Now that title sounds bad I know. Like I hear y’all thinking “who would leave someone behind in such a situation and fragile state”. Well hear me out. This isn’t psychosis as in schizophrenia but more her own fault. Now for context I’m 22 and she’s 39. Yes for the people mathing their math she was 17 when I was born. Anyway, my mother has been using drugs starting with weed and progressing to heavier stuff (no crack or meth I swear)since she was 13/14 and for the last 12 years she’s had multiple drug induced psychosis. The last I’d say 6 years it’s been especially bad. It started with her thinking everyone was conspiring against her then it just devolved into her screaming at my sister that my sister will get rxped if we didn’t leave the house right then and there. My sister was 11 when that happened. We managed to convince her to stay home because nothing will happen but she insisted that we didn’t turn on the tv and whispered and leave the downstairs blackout curtains closed to make it seem like we weren’t home for the day. Now doing that wouldn’t make sense because she had a car and we lived in a nosy neighborhood so they would know if we weren’t home but oh well. It progressed so badly eventually that when I was 17 so around the time it got especially bad I just couldn’t live there anymore and moved out to a young adult group home and my sister’s father insisted she went to live with her grandparents. Than everything was kinda calm again for about 6 months to a year. During this time she would hear the sound of ambulance and police sirens when they weren’t there but other than that she was fine. I was planning a small 2 week vacation to the high coasts of Sweden to clear my head and shit just hit the fan. She now was hearing my sister screaming for help and was convinced she was being tortured in an underground bunker underneath the neighbors backyard. I blocked her number because I was getting walls and walls of ranting texts about this and I just needed a break and proceeded to go to Sweden. 4 or 5 days into that trip I got a text from my cousin asking if my mom was okay with a couple of screenshots attached from posts on facebook from my mom and one of them said my sister was tortured to death and I’d been murdered with the rouse I was just on vacation. Now the last 3 years were relatively calm because after those facebook posts she threatened the neighbors and got a forced hospitalization. I’ve had to block her several times still because she’d be completely fine for like between a few weeks and a few months before she went off again. Last year I got a boyfriend and when she’s clear headed she approves of him but when she’s not she’s saying all sorts of weird conspiracy stuff about him. Now a couple days ago I went to visit her again with my boyfriend and it was clear she’d been using and wasn’t all there and my boyfriend had a friend over at his house so he just dropped me off and went to his house because I told him I’d be fine. The first hour or so it actually was fine untill she started accusing him of being manipulative and that I needed to “take my rose coloured glasses off” and slyly commenting that I don’t know what he’s doing when I’m not there when in fact I do. Not because I’m controlling or have trust issues but we don’t feel the need to not tell about our whereabouts and happenings because he always knows where I am too. Also a little context for later my mom told me she was sober the week prior. Now I was willing to just see past this little episode but when she continued after I went home over text that he can’t be trusted and spewing other nonsense I texted back “this is so disappointing because I thought you were sober. Bye” and I blocked her. Now I’m seriously considering cutting her off completely untill she’s 100% sober and never touching that shit again. It seems like a weird ultimatum but it’s so emotionally draining and when she’s sober she’s fine. No conspiratorial thinking, no hearing things that aren’t there, nothing. I’m a little on the fence though. Anyway thank you for reading and I’m sorry for the long post and if it seemed a little incomprehensible. I have a lot on my mind.
submitted by NonGamerGamerGirl to TrueOffMyChest [link] [comments]

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