Everything in my inventory is up for trade. The most valuable items are listed here, the rest you can find in My Inventory

Feel free to Add Me or even better send a Trade Offer. Open for any suggestions: upgrades, downgrades / knives, gloves, skins / stickers, patterns, floats.

All Buyouts are listed in cash value.

KNIVES

★ Butterfly Knife Lore (Factory New), B/O: $7194.77

★ Butterfly Knife Autotronic (Minimal Wear), B/O: $2025.74

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★ M9 Bayonet Ultraviolet (Field-Tested), B/O: $557.87

★ M9 Bayonet Stained (Well-Worn), B/O: $529.41

★ M9 Bayonet Boreal Forest (Field-Tested), B/O: $465.39

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★ Talon Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $1295.27

★ Bayonet Tiger Tooth (Minimal Wear), B/O: $746.28

★ Karambit Bright Water (Field-Tested), B/O: $688.15

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★ Flip Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $547.93

★ Flip Knife Autotronic (Minimal Wear), B/O: $476.69

★ Flip Knife Case Hardened (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $278.18

★ Flip Knife Black Laminate (Well-Worn), B/O: $258.83

★ Flip Knife Urban Masked (Field-Tested), B/O: $181.64

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★ Stiletto Knife Marble Fade (Factory New), B/O: $686.04

★ Stiletto Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $665.41

★ Stiletto Knife, B/O: $601.39

★ Stiletto Knife Crimson Web (Field-Tested), B/O: $418.25

★ Stiletto Knife Night Stripe (Field-Tested), B/O: $227.80

★ Stiletto Knife Boreal Forest (Field-Tested), B/O: $194.96

★ Stiletto Knife Safari Mesh (Field-Tested), B/O: $192.79

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★ Nomad Knife Crimson Web (Field-Tested), B/O: $518.11

★ Nomad Knife Scorched (Field-Tested), B/O: $169.78

★ Nomad Knife Forest DDPAT (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $166.88

★ StatTrak™ Nomad Knife Blue Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $335.79

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★ Skeleton Knife Stained (Well-Worn), B/O: $442.05

★ Skeleton Knife Urban Masked (Minimal Wear), B/O: $426.24

★ Skeleton Knife Boreal Forest (Field-Tested), B/O: $314.03

★ StatTrak™ Skeleton Knife Fade (Minimal Wear), B/O: $2361.28

★ StatTrak™ Skeleton Knife Urban Masked (Field-Tested), B/O: $376.53

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★ Ursus Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $557.12

★ Ursus Knife, B/O: $471.42

★ Ursus Knife Blue Steel (Minimal Wear), B/O: $212.37

★ Ursus Knife Case Hardened (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $187.66

★ Ursus Knife Damascus Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $178.18

★ Ursus Knife Ultraviolet (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $155.13

★ Ursus Knife Boreal Forest (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $124.26

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★ Huntsman Knife Black Laminate (Minimal Wear), B/O: $204.83

★ Huntsman Knife Black Laminate (Field-Tested), B/O: $184.50

★ StatTrak™ Huntsman Knife Lore (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $224.11

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★ Bowie Knife Gamma Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $2142.02

★ Bowie Knife, B/O: $230.44

★ Bowie Knife Damascus Steel (Factory New), B/O: $209.20

★ Bowie Knife Ultraviolet (Minimal Wear), B/O: $180.51

★ Bowie Knife Ultraviolet (Field-Tested), B/O: $131.03

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★ Falchion Knife Night (Field-Tested), B/O: $132.54

★ Falchion Knife Urban Masked (Well-Worn), B/O: $112.81

★ Falchion Knife Scorched (Field-Tested), B/O: $108.81

★ Falchion Knife Forest DDPAT (Field-Tested), B/O: $107.82

★ Falchion Knife Safari Mesh (Field-Tested), B/O: $107.46

★ StatTrak™ Falchion Knife Ultraviolet (Field-Tested), B/O: $143.08

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★ Paracord Knife Crimson Web (Minimal Wear), B/O: $486.48

★ Paracord Knife Blue Steel (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $163.12

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★ Survival Knife Blue Steel (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $138.26

★ Survival Knife Night Stripe (Field-Tested), B/O: $131.03

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★ Gut Knife Sapphire (Minimal Wear), B/O: $1127.79

★ Gut Knife Gamma Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $286.17

★ Gut Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $246.55

★ Gut Knife Marble Fade (Factory New), B/O: $240.77

★ Gut Knife, B/O: $210.49

★ Gut Knife Lore (Field-Tested), B/O: $194.22

★ Gut Knife Case Hardened (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $151.51

★ Gut Knife Blue Steel (Minimal Wear), B/O: $124.94

★ Gut Knife Rust Coat (Well-Worn), B/O: $118.99

★ Gut Knife Boreal Forest (Minimal Wear), B/O: $109.80

★ StatTrak™ Gut Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $237.96

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★ Shadow Daggers Gamma Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $264.92

★ Shadow Daggers Marble Fade (Factory New), B/O: $253.03

★ Shadow Daggers Tiger Tooth (Factory New), B/O: $237.22

★ Shadow Daggers Crimson Web (Field-Tested), B/O: $153.40

★ Shadow Daggers Autotronic (Minimal Wear), B/O: $144.42

★ Shadow Daggers Blue Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $105.20

★ StatTrak™ Shadow Daggers Damascus Steel (Minimal Wear), B/O: $150.46

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★ Navaja Knife Fade (Factory New), B/O: $365.99

★ Navaja Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $228.93

★ Navaja Knife Marble Fade (Factory New), B/O: $227.43

★ Navaja Knife Slaughter (Factory New), B/O: $209.06

★ Navaja Knife, B/O: $203.16

★ Navaja Knife Case Hardened (Well-Worn), B/O: $132.57

★ Navaja Knife Damascus Steel (Factory New), B/O: $121.69

★ Navaja Knife Damascus Steel (Minimal Wear), B/O: $109.95

★ Navaja Knife Damascus Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $100.41

★ StatTrak™ Navaja Knife Fade (Factory New), B/O: $369.01

★ StatTrak™ Navaja Knife Damascus Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $109.95

GLOVES

★ Sport Gloves Amphibious (Minimal Wear), B/O: $2394.67

★ Sport Gloves Omega (Well-Worn), B/O: $572.33

★ Sport Gloves Bronze Morph (Minimal Wear), B/O: $338.88

★ Sport Gloves Big Game (Field-Tested), B/O: $323.66

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★ Specialist Gloves Marble Fade (Minimal Wear), B/O: $1652.07

★ Specialist Gloves Tiger Strike (Field-Tested), B/O: $599.14

★ Specialist Gloves Crimson Web (Well-Worn), B/O: $231.57

★ Specialist Gloves Buckshot (Minimal Wear), B/O: $126.21

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★ Moto Gloves POW! (Minimal Wear), B/O: $996.99

★ Moto Gloves POW! (Field-Tested), B/O: $383.31

★ Moto Gloves POW! (Well-Worn), B/O: $276.00

★ Moto Gloves Turtle (Field-Tested), B/O: $180.28

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★ Hand Wraps CAUTION! (Minimal Wear), B/O: $502.29

★ Hand Wraps Giraffe (Minimal Wear), B/O: $180.73

★ Hand Wraps CAUTION! (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $178.32

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★ Driver Gloves Queen Jaguar (Minimal Wear), B/O: $181.01

★ Driver Gloves Rezan the Red (Field-Tested), B/O: $101.66

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★ Broken Fang Gloves Jade (Field-Tested), B/O: $127.88

★ Broken Fang Gloves Needle Point (Minimal Wear), B/O: $124.55

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★ Bloodhound Gloves Guerrilla (Minimal Wear), B/O: $127.94

★ Hydra Gloves Case Hardened (Field-Tested), B/O: $102.55

WEAPONS

AK-47 X-Ray (Well-Worn), B/O: $478.95

AUG Hot Rod (Factory New), B/O: $425.83

StatTrak™ M4A1-S Hyper Beast (Factory New), B/O: $413.95

M4A4 Daybreak (Factory New), B/O: $309.51

StatTrak™ AK-47 Aquamarine Revenge (Factory New), B/O: $305.43

AK-47 Case Hardened (Well-Worn), B/O: $196.38

StatTrak™ M4A4 Temukau (Minimal Wear), B/O: $174.64

P90 Run and Hide (Field-Tested), B/O: $167.03

AWP Asiimov (Field-Tested), B/O: $153.33

Souvenir SSG 08 Death Strike (Minimal Wear), B/O: $140.00

M4A1-S Printstream (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $124.70

StatTrak™ M4A1-S Golden Coil (Field-Tested), B/O: $117.48

AWP Asiimov (Well-Worn), B/O: $115.97

StatTrak™ Desert Eagle Printstream (Minimal Wear), B/O: $112.96

StatTrak™ AK-47 Asiimov (Minimal Wear), B/O: $110.85

Souvenir M4A1-S Master Piece (Well-Worn), B/O: $102.42

AK-47 Bloodsport (Minimal Wear), B/O: $100.53

Trade Offer Link - Steam Profile Link - My Inventory

Knives - Bowie Knife, Butterfly Knife, Falchion Knife, Flip Knife, Gut Knife, Huntsman Knife, M9 Bayonet, Bayonet, Karambit, Shadow Daggers, Stiletto Knife, Ursus Knife, Navaja Knife, Talon Knife, Classic Knife, Paracord Knife, Survival Knife, Nomad Knife, Skeleton Knife, Patterns - Gamma Doppler, Doppler (Phase 1, Phase 2, Phase 3, Phase 4, Black Pearl, Sapphire, Ruby, Emerald), Crimson Web, Lore, Fade, Ultraviolet, Night, Marble Fade (Fire & Ice, Fake FI), Case Hardened (Blue Gem), Autotronic, Slaughter, Black Laminate, Tiger Tooth, Boreal Forest, Scorched, Blue Steel, Vanilla, Damascus Steel, Forest DDPAT, Urban Masked, Freehand, Stained, Bright Water, Safari Mesh, Rust Coat, Gloves - Bloodhound Gloves (Charred, Snakebite, Guerrilla, Bronzed), Driver Gloves (Snow Leopard, King Snake, Crimson Weave, Imperial Plaid, Black Tie, Lunar Weave, Diamondback, Rezan the Red, Overtake, Queen Jaguar, Convoy, Racing Green), Hand Wraps (Cobalt Skulls, CAUTION!, Overprint, Slaughter, Leather, Giraffe, Badlands, Spruce DDPAT, Arboreal, Constrictor, Desert Shamagh, Duct Tape), Moto Gloves (Spearmint, POW!, Cool Mint, Smoke Out, Finish Line, Polygon, Blood Pressure, Turtle, Boom!, Eclipse, 3rd Commando Company, Transport), Specialist Gloves (Crimson Kimono, Tiger Strike, Emerald Web, Field Agent, Marble Fade, Fade, Foundation, Lt. Commander, Crimson Web, Mogul, Forest DDPAT, Buckshot), Sport Gloves (Pandora's Box, Superconductor, Hedge Maze, Vice, Amphibious, Slingshot, Omega, Arid, Big Game, Nocts, Scarlet Shamagh, Bronze Morph), Hydra Gloves (Case Hardened, Emerald, Rattler, Mangrove), Broken Fang Gloves (Jade, Yellow-banded, Unhinged, Needle Point), Pistols - P2000 (Wicked Sick, Ocean Foam, Fire Element, Amber Fade, Corticera, Chainmail, Imperial Dragon, Obsidian, Scorpion, Handgun, Acid Etched), USP-S (Printstream, Kill Confirmed, Whiteout, Road Rash, Owergrowth, The Traitor, Neo-Noir, Dark Water, Orion, Blueprint, Stainless, Caiman, Serum, Monster Mashup, Royal Blue, Ancient Visions, Cortex, Orange Anolis, Ticket To Hell, Black Lotus, Cyrex, Check Engine, Guardian, Purple DDPAT, Torque, Blood Tiger, Flashback, Business Class, Pathfinder, Para Green), Lead Conduit, Glock-18 (Ramese's Reach, Umbral Rabbit, Fade, Candy Apple, Bullet Queen, Synth Leaf, Neo-Noir, Nuclear Garden, Dragon Tatto, Reactor, Pink DDPAT, Twilight Galaxy, Sand Dune, Groundwater, Blue Fissure, Snack Attack, Water Elemental, Brass, Wasteland Rebel, Vogue, Franklin, Royal Legion, Gamma Doppler, Weasel, Steel Disruption, Ironwork, Grinder, High Beam, Moonrise, Oxide Blaze, Bunsen Burner, Clear Polymer, Bunsen Burner, Night), P250 (Apep's Curse, Re.built, Nuclear Threat, Modern Hunter, Splash, Whiteout, Vino Primo, Mehndi, Asiimov, Visions, Undertow, Cartel, See Ya Later, Gunsmoke, Splash, Digital Architect, Muertos, Red Rock, Bengal Tiger, Crimson Kimono, Wingshot, Metallic DDPAT, Hive, Dark Filigree, Mint Kimono), Five-Seven (Neon Kimono, Berries And Cherries, Fall Hazard, Crimson Blossom, Hyper Beast, Nitro, Fairy Tale, Case Hardened, Copper Galaxy, Angry Mob, Monkey Business, Fowl Play, Anodized Gunmetal, Hot Shot, Retrobution, Boost Protocol), CZ75-Auto (Chalice, Crimson Web, Emerald Quartz, The Fuschia is Now, Nitro, Xiangliu, Yellow Jacket, Victoria, Poison Dart, Syndicate, Eco, Hexane, Pole, Tigris), Tec-9 (Mummy's Rot, Rebel, Terrace, Nuclear Threat, Hades, Rust Leaf, Decimator, Blast From, Orange Murano, Toxic, Fuel Injector, Remote Control, Bamboo Forest, Isaac, Avalanche, Brother, Re-Entry, Blue Titanium, Bamboozle), R8 Revolver (Banana Cannon, Fade, Blaze, Crimson Web, Liama Cannon, Crazy 8, Reboot, Canal Spray, Night, Amber Fade), Desert Eagle (Blaze, Hand Cannon, Fennec Fox, Sunset Storm, Emerald Jörmungandr, Pilot, Hypnotic, Golden Koi, Printstream, Cobalt Disruption, Code Red, Ocean Drive, Midnight Storm, Kumicho Dragon, Crimson Web, Heirloom, Night Heist, Mecha Industries, Night, Conspiracy, Trigger Discipline, Naga, Directive, Light Rail), Dual Berettas (Flora Carnivora, Duelist, Cobra Strike, Black Limba, Emerald, Hemoglobin, Twin Turbo, Marina, Melondrama, Pyre, Retribution, Briar, Dezastre, Royal Consorts, Urban Shock, Dualing Dragons, Panther, Balance), Rifles - Galil (Aqua Terrace, Winter Forest, Chatterbox, Sugar Rush, Pheonix Blacklight, CAUTION!, Orange DDPAT, Cerberus, Dusk Ruins, Eco, Chromatic Aberration, Stone Cold, Tuxedo, Sandstorm, Shattered, Urban Rubble, Rocket Pop, Kami, Crimson Tsunami, Connexion), SCAR-20 (Fragments, Brass, Cyrex, Palm, Splash Jam, Cardiac, Emerald, Crimson Web, Magna Carta, Stone Mosaico, Bloodsport, Enforcer), AWP (Black Nile, Duality, Gungnir, Dragon Lore, Prince, Medusa, Desert Hydra, Fade, Lightning Strike, Oni Taiji, Silk Tiger, Graphite, Chromatic Aberration, Asiimov, Snake Camo, Boom, Containment Breach, Wildfire, Redline, Electric Hive, Hyper Beast, Neo-Noir, Man-o'-war, Pink DDPAT, Corticera, Sun in Leo, Elite Build, Fever Dream, Atheris, Mortis, PAW, Exoskeleton, Worm God, POP AWP, Phobos, Acheron, Pit Viper, Capillary, Safari Mesh), AK-47 (Steel Delta, Head Shot, Wild Lotus, Gold Arabesque, X-Ray, Fire Serpent, Hydroponic, Panthera Onca, Case Hardened, Vulcan, Jet Set, Fuel Injector, Bloodsport, Nightwish, First Class, Neon Rider, Asiimov, Red Laminate, Aquamarine Revenge, The Empress, Wasteland Rebel, Jaguar, Black Laminate, Leet Museo, Neon Revolution, Redline, Frontside Misty, Predator, Legion of Anubis, Point Disarray, Orbit Mk01, Blue Laminate, Green Laminate, Emerald Pinstripe, Cartel, Phantom Disruptor, Jungle Spray, Safety Net, Rat Rod, Baroque Purple, Slate, Elite Build, Uncharted, Safari Mesh), FAMAS (Waters of Nephthys, Sundown, Prime Conspiracy, Afterimage, Commemoration, Dark Water, Spitfire, Pulse, Eye of Athena, Meltdown, Rapid Eye Move, Roll Cage, Styx, Mecha Industrie, Djinn, ZX Spectron, Valence, Neural Net, Night Borre, Hexne), M4A4 (Eye of Horus, Temukau, Howl, Poseidon, Asiimov, Daybreak, Hellfire, Zirka, Red DDPAT, Radiation Hazard, Modern Hunter, The Emperor, The Coalition, Bullet Rain, Cyber Security, X-Ray, Dark Blossom, Buzz Kill, In Living Color, Neo-Noir, Desolate Space, 龍王 (Dragon King), Royal Paladin, The Battlestar, Global Offensive, Tooth Fairy, Desert-Strike, Griffin, Evil Daimyo, Spider Lily, Converter), M4A1-S (Emphorosaur-S, Welcome to the Jungle, Imminent Danger, Knight, Hot Rod, Icarus Fell, Blue Phosphor, Printstream, Master Piece, Dark Water, Golden Coil, Bright Water, Player Two, Atomic Alloy, Guardian, Chantico's Fire, Hyper Beast, Mecha Industries, Cyrex, Control Panel, Moss Quartz, Nightmare, Decimator, Leaded Glass, Basilisk, Blood Tiger, Briefing, Night Terror, Nitro, VariCamo, Flashback), SG 553 (Cyberforce, Hazard Pay, Bulldozer, Integrale, Dragon Tech, Ultraviolet, Colony IV, Hypnotic, Cyrex, Candy Apple, Barricade, Pulse), SSG 08 (Death Strike, Sea Calico, Blood in the Water, Orange Filigree, Dragonfire, Big Iron, Bloodshot, Detour, Turbo Peek, Red Stone), AUG (Akihabara Accept, Flame Jörmungandr, Hot Rod, Midnight Lily, Sand Storm, Carved Jade, Wings, Anodized Navy, Death by Puppy, Torque, Bengal Tiger, Chameleon, Fleet Flock, Random Access, Momentum, Syd Mead, Stymphalian, Arctic Wolf, Aristocrat, Navy Murano), G3SG1 (Chronos, Violet Murano, Flux, Demeter, Orange Kimono, The Executioner, Green Apple, Arctic Polar Camo, Contractor), SMGs - P90 (ScaraB Rush, Neoqueen, Astral Jörmungandr, Run and Hide, Emerald Dragon, Cold Blooded, Death by Kitty, Baroque Red, Vent Rush, Blind Spot, Asiimov, Trigon, Sunset Lily, Death Grip, Leather, Nostalgia, Fallout Warning, Tiger Pit, Schermatic, Virus, Shapewood, Glacier Mesh, Shallow Grave, Chopper, Desert Warfare), MAC-10 (Sakkaku, Hot Snakes, Copper Borre, Red Filigree, Gold Brick, Graven, Case Hardened, Stalker, Amber Fade, Neon Rider, Tatter, Curse, Propaganda, Nuclear Garden, Disco Tech, Toybox, Heat, Indigo), UMP-45 (Wild Child, Fade, Blaze, Day Lily, Minotaur's Labyrinth, Crime Scene, Caramel, Bone Pile, Momentum, Primal Saber), MP7 (Teal Blossom, Fade, Nemesis, Whiteout, Asterion, Bloosport, Abyssal Apparition, Full Stop, Special Delivery, Neon Ply, Asterion, Ocean Foam, Powercore, Scorched, Impire), PP-Bizon (Modern Hunter, Rust Coat, Forest Leaves, Antique, High Roller, Blue Streak, Seabird, Judgement of Anubis, Bamboo Print, Embargo, Chemical Green, Coblat Halftone, Fuel Rod, Photic Zone, Irradiated Alert, Carbon Fiber), MP9 (Featherweight, Wild Lily, Pandora's Box, Stained Glass, Bulldozer, Dark Age, Hot Rod, Hypnotic, Hydra, Rose Iron, Music Box, Setting Sun, Food Chain, Airlock, Mount Fuji, Starlight Protector, Ruby Poison Dart, Deadly Poison), MP5-SD (Liquidation, Oxide Oasis, Phosphor, Nitro, Agent, Autumn Twilly), Shotguns, Machineguns - Sawed-Off (Kiss♥Love, First Class, Orange DDPAT, Rust Coat, The Kraken, Devourer, Mosaico, Wasteland Princess, Bamboo Shadow, Copper, Serenity, Limelight, Apocalypto), XM1014 (Frost Borre, Ancient Lore, Red Leather, Elegant Vines, Banana Leaf, Jungle, Urban Perforated, Grassland, Blaze Orange, Heaven Guard, VariCamo Blue, Entombed, XOXO, Seasons, Tranquility, Bone Machine, Incinegator, Teclu Burner, Black Tie, Zombie Offensive, Watchdog), Nova (Sobek's Bite, Baroque Orange, Hyper Beast, Green Apple, Antique, Modern Hunter, Walnut, Forest Leaves, Graphite, Blaze Orange, Rising Skull, Tempest, Bloomstick, Interlock, Quick Sand, Moon in Libra, Clean Polymer, Red Quartz, Toy Soldier), MAG-7 (Copper Coated, Insomnia, Cinqueda, Counter Terrace, Prism Terrace, Memento, Chainmail, Hazard, Justice, Bulldozer, Silver, Core Breach, Firestarter, Praetorian, Heat, Hard Water, Monster Call, BI83 Spectrum, SWAG-7), M249 (Humidor, Shipping Forecast, Blizzard Marbleized, Downtown, Jungle DDPAT, Nebula Crusader, Impact Drill, Emerald Poison Dart), Negev (Mjölnir, Anodized Navy, Palm, Power Loader, Bratatat, CaliCamo, Phoenix Stencil, Infrastructure, Boroque Sand), Wear - Factory New (FN), Minimal Wear (MW), Field-Tested (FT), Well-Worn (WW), Battle-Scarred (BS), Stickers Holo/Foil/Gold - Katowice 2014, Krakow 2017, Howling Dawn, Katowice 2015, Crown, London 2018, Cologne 2014, Boston 2018, Atlanta 2017, Cluj-Napoca 2015, DreamHack 2014, King on the Field, Harp of War, Winged Difuser, Cologne 2016, Cologne 2015, MLG Columbus 2016, Katowice 2019, Berlin 2019, RMR 2020, Stockholm 2021, Antwerp 2022, Paris 2023, Swag Foil, Flammable foil, Others - Souvenirs, Agents, Pins, Passes, Gifts, Music Kits, Cases, Keys, Capsules, Packages, Patches

Some items on the list may no longer be available or are still locked, visit My Inventory for more details.

Send a Trade Offer for fastest response. I consider all offers.

Add me for discuss if there is a serious offer that needs to be discussed.

We are easily influenced by ideas and groupthink - much more than we would like to believe. This applies to the belief in some special supernatural ascension or New Earth.
This constant insistences that "Earth is going into a higher vibration" or "We are shifting timelines" or "The activation codes are coming" or "We feel ill because ascension causes symptoms" or "The matrix is breaking down" -- is sadly, a delusion.
I don't care if Dolores Cannon is well respected and said the Earth is splitting. I don't care if people are claiming to be in the middle of the highest form of alchemical transformation which will bring them back to the original crystalline blueprint or whatever. Unless an interdimensional being, or the higher self, literally manifests in front of us, guiding us into the various stages of some amazing process, then all we're doing is guesswork - putting a fantasy story, a fluffy narrative, to the difficult experiences many of us have on Earth.
There are many red flags within this concept of ascension:

1. Supposedly it is the individual's responsibility to get away from the "dark" and go into the "light", not once or twice, but in a constant upward trajectory throughout time or else they will miss some crucial event, or get stuck in the Old Earth. This doesn't make sense because as humans, we never remain in any one state and cannot be simplified like that. We're always in flux. A few years ago, I felt amazing - full of creativity, love, and joy . If there WAS going to be an event, I was ready! But after years of difficulty, both mental, physical and financial, I find it more difficult to tap into that state as often. My once-experienced "high vibrational state" apparently doesn't matter though - the ascension codes/DNA upgrades are coming and I better be ready! In some circles people suggest "The ascension is in you - the more you align with your True Self the more you will perceive the New Earth". So which is it? Are we in a process that's collective or personal? How can we miss the flash or event if it's up to us? And if someone embodies a beautiful state of love and light but then falls back into a "lower" state before the supposed shift, what happens then? So many contradictions and half-baked ideas.
2. There are a select few chosen ones, or lightworkers, or special souls, who came here to help the world upgrade, or alchemize themselves - OK - so we're superheroes in disguise who didn't realize this until we learned the concept from a book or Internet page that spoke to us. And now we have to do our part in raising the frequency of the planet, or destroying the matrix grid lines or finding our lost Higher Self. But where and who did we hear this from? Is there some book in the Universe which verifiably pinpoints a select few souls to be doing this job? And how are we doing this special job without a list of requirements and tasks? There's no roadmap to this other than self-styled experts and confident speakers? Instead, most of us find out about ascensional lightworker exit-the-matrix stuff from other humans who ASSUME truths and IDENTIFY with them. Who the fuck enters a job without knowing how to complete it?
3. ...But then people will say "We were given free will to integrate the upgrades or not" or "We are trapped souls who forgot we're on a mission". So if we can forget we're on a mission, or if we're able to get lost in the sauce of humanity, then how effective or intelligent is this ascension? Who's steering the wheel? Without instructions and without having a roadmap on how to navigate, how can anyone do their part?
4. There is a long list of purported ascension symptoms from dizziness to chronic pain to depression to acne, etc. Let's face it - Being a human means dealing with bad air, food and water quality. We get stressed. We make mistakes and it all impacts our bodies. Almost everyone is in imperfect health, whether they're a child or adult. Go to any video on ascension symptoms and you'll see hundreds of people claiming their imperfect health is proof, or the result, of some amazing cosmic showdown happening behind the scenes. How about, we're all aging? Or its common for everyone to undergo health struggles at some point? Most of us didn't grow up on the greatest lifestyles and even now, with all of this wifi and loneliness and worldwide distress - how can we expect our health not to be affected? The denial is astounding. Which leads me to...
5. The justification of suffering as means for future pleasure. This is not much different from the Christian idea that suffering in Christ is noble and leads to heaven. People repeat, as if its untouchable wisdom: "Things only look like they're getting worse on Earth because the darkness is finally coming to light to be cleansed!" or "You're feeling bad because your shadow needs to be transmuted to accept the activation codes!" How do we know? How can anyone say such grandiose statements with confidence? Seriously, what is up with this demeanor people have of evaluating the situation perfectly and speaking in a conclusive, all-knowing fashion? Who told you the darkness is coming to the light for a future New Earth? Another human? A channeling session? A published book from an author who we think has direct access to God? Again, unless we are shown without a shred of doubt, in supernatural fashion, that the negative events on Earth are a result of a coming shift, who are we to speak for the Universe?

It's hard being human and accepting how broken everything is or can be - so we would rather huddle together and attach ourselves to the idea that we suffer for the sake of some great future. Which, of course, goes against some teachings that claim the present is all that exists. Leader will even simultaneously say "Stay in the present, it's the best way to be apart of this shift" AND "We are in the middle of an event, it is coming at some point in the future, so be prepared".
Not to mention - the idea of ascension and a New Earth comes from a particular biblical idea of rapture, which is actually a Protestant idea that developed after many sects of Christianity formed.
I have befriended and met many who hold these ideas near and dear to them. Most of them have very messy lives and minds. Those most attracted to the New Earth fanaticism want to escape. I understand! I would love it if we woke up in a world free of limitation and ugliness too. Instead of believing in New Earth, I just accept Earthly life is difficult and will never be anything other than what it's been - a contrast of energies, dualities, opposites.
Thoughts? Do you agree? Do I just not get it and maybe there's a Pleadeian starseed out there who can teach me how wrong I am?

Hi,
So I know it’s early, but I wanted to get an idea of where active communities are for biomedical, biosciences, genetics, bioengineering/BME etc PhD-applying people!
2 more questions:
1) do you have any suggestions for what I should start doing now to prepare for when applications open in August or September?
2) in general, is it relevant to mention your personal background when applying to PhD (e.g. I grew up poor in the rural South, I’m a URM, mental illness in the family, single parent household because dad was deported, etc so I overcame great difficulties to get a full ride scholarship to undergrad). Even now, 4 years after leaving home it of course significantly influences my career trajectory. I hear programs value diversity & maybe mentioning this in a line or two would be okay — what are your thoughts? I think in light of my upbringing, I have achieved tremendous success in undergrad and wonder if it’s worth even giving admissions a whiff of the complexity of all that.
Thanks for your insights 🫶🏻

After I discovered my husband’s affair, his affair partner LOST IT when he “broke up” with her the next day. She launched a series of emotional attacks on me, including having her friends DM my Facebook friends list including my relatives, coworkers, etc to humiliate me. She had her mother call me on the phone and scream at me and insult me. She hired an attorney and lied in court documents that she filed against me (attempted a restraining order against me) saying I was stalking her. (I have never laid eyes on her in person, I have only seen her in the naked pornographic videos of herself she sent to my husband that I found.) If the judge had actually believed her lies, it would have jeopardized my career and employability to have that on my record, which was terrifying when I was faced with getting divorced and having to fully support myself (one income household is rough these days as we all know).
She inflicted so much additional stress and damage onto me during the lowest, most traumatic and unstable time of my life. I was blindsided by my DDay and it destroyed me in so many ways. Dealing with her craziness and emotional attacks on top of everything nearly broke me. I do believe she was trying to get me to hurt myself. I definitely considered it.
I know she is a mentally ill woman. I mean, she was performing oral sex on her married coworker directly beside of a dumpster for months while engaged. She is diagnosed bipolar. Suffers from anorexia. Serially cheated on her fiancé with more guys than just my husband. I guess I just don’t understand why she came after ME so hard. She tried to ruin and destroy my marriage. She initiated the affair. I’ve read it all, where he initially turned her down several times and she escalated and started sexting him and pressuring him to meet up and then she gave him oral sex the first time they ever met up.
But Why did she hate me so much? Why did she try to ruin my life even more after my husband ended their affair? I just don’t understand how a person I never met in my life could purposely cause so much harm to me. He broke up with her and she came after ME?
My husband said she used to “stalk” my instagram and make comments to him about anything I posted such as if I posted where we went out to dinner or if we took our dog to the park or went on a vacation, etc. And she would complain how jealous she was. But how is any of that my fault??? She knew him for 10 months before she seduced him for fun. She chose to seduce a married man. I had nothing to do with her choice. Like; what the heck did I do to deserve a complete stranger I’ve never met to try to destroy everything I’ve worked for in my life (my career, my marriage, my financial situation, my home, my safety). What motivates these “other women” to think they are entitled to swoop in and “steal” someone else’s husband and lifestyle?
Anyway, I do realize this post is very blaming of the AP and not so much of my husband. Trust me when I say I very much blame him and hold him responsible for his choice and willingness to continually betray me. This post is more about after discovery. After discovery, this woman acted like SHE was the victim and I was the bad guy. It made no sense. Whereas,After Dday, my husband has completely done everything humanly possible to try to heal himself and repair our marriage including impatient treatment for pornography addiction, weekly individual therapy, weekly group therapy, etc. He never blamed me. He took full accountability and continues to do so.
We are 2 years post DDay and I still find myself wondering why his affair partner came after me so hard. I know he never said he was going to leave me. So I don’t know why she got so mad when he broke up with her. Was she delusional and expected him to leave his wife and life partner of 13 years for her when she was giving him oral sex beside a dumpster while engaged and while also dating other men?. (We have done a full therapeutic disclosure as well as multiple polygraph tests so I know my husband never told her he was going to leave me. In fact, he told her he was NOT planning to leave me ever.)

Opinions wanted.. I just went out to eat with my family and we had some chicken parm & spaghetti. I haven’t had spaghetti in a while but I decided to get it and ate some ice cream on the way home because the food honestly wasn’t that great. I come home, do a few things feeling completely normal (just very full) and I go to take my medications (sitting on my bed) with some power c vitamin water (not refrigerated but opened before) and the second I stood up from my bed I almost projectile vomitted out of my nose and throat. A rush of acid came up. I’ve never experienced this before. Now it feels like there’s a big glob in my throat and it won’t go away..
Took some antacid chews and a med.

Does anyone else have absolutely no idea what they want to do with their life? And I don't just mean career wise, I also mean other life choices like buying a house, etc.
I feel like I don't know who I am. I am very influenced by people around me. And society tells us we must work full time to earn enough money to either rent or buy a house and pay bills. Then take just a few short breaks from work for holidays.
I was in a relationship and we bought a house, I had a full time job, and I hated it. I mean, I wasn't happy in the relationship and have since left, but I also was very bored. I didn't see the point in my life, I didn't see the point in working for some random company majority of the time and just having a few breaks for me. Basically living for the weekend. I had thoughts about wanting to travel or live in a van.
I made the decision to leave the relationship which meant I had to move back in to my parents. I then met someone else who had a completely different outlook on life. They had already lived in different countries and they were keen to live in a van, or build a self sufficient home and believed we shouldn't live for the weekend. So I was like, great, that sounds the dream.
But then I got my autism diagnosis, things went downhill for me, I felt like I couldn't travel or even go out and ended up getting another WFH full time job and living for the weekend (still living at my parents). And I started believing that's what I want again, I want a house, a pet, a full time job earning decent money, holidays.
But I don't know if that is what I want, or what society says I should do. Im only surrounded by people who live this way. And I'm a sponge, so I'm easily influenced by people around me.
Or is it because I'm a realistic person, so the idea of not living this kind of life is scary and I think, well how will I have enough money!? Money shouldn't be important though, I just worry because of how expensive everything is these days.
I am going on a bit now. Basically I don't know what I want, or how I think I should live my life. Which I think is partly down to being autistic and living in a world not designed for me.
Does anyone else feel the same way? Thanks!

I thought it would be a fun idea to write out my headcanons for the other, unmentioned settlements/cities in the New California Republic. As a SoCal native, I thought it would also be fun seeing how some notable cities in the region would look in the fallout universe. I’ve only included places in Southern California because I honestly don’t have too much detailed knowledge about central/northern CA cities.
I tried fitting it in with the lore at the time of New Vegas in 2281, but there might be a few mistakes here and there.

San Diego Area

-Camp Pendleton: Controlled by one of the largest Raider groups of SoCal, cutting off entry to the San Diego area from the 5 Freeway. Uses restored Vertiberds, Power Armor, and APCs left over by the Marines after the war. Because of this, they are an extremely valuable target for the Brotherhood of Steel, though they have not launched a full-scale attack due to fears of high casualties. This, along with manpower shortages in the region due to the the situation in the Mojave, has prevented the NCR from conducting operations as well. Many in the San Diego area have discussed creating a temporary alliance between Settlers/NCR, the BOS, and the Temecula Super Mutants, though the feasibility of that seems a bit low.
-Escondido: Settlement located along the former 15 freeway and acts as a trade settlement on the way to San Diego. Population: 400. Facing raider attacks from nearby Camp Pendleton and feeling like they’ve been failed by the NCR, some local leaders have considered asking the Temecula Super Mutants to assist in a joint assault on the camp. Population: 500.
-San Diego: Though one of the founding states of the New California Republic, San Diego, now known as Dayglow, is severely underfunded and underdefended compared to other States. Some say this is because of its distance from the capital, others says its because of continued discriminiation towards Ghouls and Super Mutants who helped found the settlement. Despite this, it still operates as a thriving scrap hub and exports many of the materials used by NCR soldiers, vehicles, and machinery. Many smaller settlements still exist in areas farther from downtown, the most major of which include El Cajon, Chula Vista, and Miramar. The latter is the main NCR facility in the area, and has been requesting additional support from Shady Sands to help defeat the Camp Pendleton Raiders. Though having the threat of Raiders in the northwest as well as threats of increased radiation exposure from the Glow in the northeast, many of these settlements are some of the most advanced in the NCR due to the pre-war governance and technology maintained by the descendants of Vault 72. Located near Balboa Park, Vault 72 is the only known vault in the area. Though initially an experiment vault, like Vault 81 in the Commonwealth, its operations were cut short, in this case after a mutiny against the scientists and Overseer by the inhabitants, many of whom were Ex-military due to the Vault’s close distance to the San Diego Navy Yards. For the next century and a half, Vault 72 acted as a control vault. Eventually, its systems started to fail, and many of its inhabitants exited the vault in search of new settlements, bringing the technology and infrastructure found in the vaults with them. As the New California Republic expands, there have been rumors among NCR soldiers about restoring some of the abandoned Navy ships in the former San Diego harbor, though nothing has been completely confirmed. The Brotherhood of Steel also seeks to acquire former military technology in the area, but has been unable to do so.

Inland Empire

-Riverside: Home to “Rubidoux,” a mid-sized NCR town with a population of about 1,000. Located on the base of Mt. Rubidoux. The Mission Inn, located in the former downtown, is now utilized as an NCR armory and base. Possible plans to rebuild more of downtown have been discussed by local leaders, but not implemented. Vault 54 is located near Rubidoux on the base of Box Springs Mountain. It is a rare control vault with around 800 living citizens, and has been frequently trading with the nearby Rubidoux settlement since its opening in around 2245.
-San Bernardino: Took the most nuclear strikes out of all cities in SoCal’s Inland Empire during the Great War. Due to this, Feral Ghoul encounters are common in the area, though their population has been dwindling in recent years due to Rubidoux settlers and NCR forces slowly clearing up the area, mainly to help caravans from the area safely travel the 215 freeway to reach high desert settlements.
-Temecula: Reclaimed by former Master Super Mutants into a small settlement, population of 50. Do not mind caravans using the former 15 freeway that goes through the city to reach the San Diego area.
-Hemet: Thriving farm town. Decently isolated from the SoCal sprawl, Hemet is relatively sleepy and peaceful. Supplies a decent amount of crops to the IE region. Nothing really interesting about it besides that. Population: 300.

Desert Regions

-Idyllwild: Used as a training ground for NCR soldiers due to its isolation in the mountains.
-Palm Springs: Run by the remnants of the Agua-Caliente, Cabazon, and Morongo Native American Tribes. Due to its strategic prominence, being south of the Mojave and west of Arizona, as well as its proximity to the Idyllwild training grounds and routes to Shady Sands, it has become popular with many NCR higher-ups, many of whom own second homes in the town. Population: 1,000. Vault 93: Located in the foothills of the San Jacinto Mountains. Experimental vault studying the effects of celebrity influence. A dozen celebrities were selected among the 900 civilians who entered the vault, where factions aligning with each of them divided up the leadership inside. No holotapes have been found showing what happened next, though it is to assume that whatever played out led to Vault 93 being opened and vacated. Though considered by the NCR to be repurposed, it sits abandoned, now silently overlooking the Sonoran wastes.

Orange County

-Huntington Beach: Inhabited by the descendants of the Children of the Cathedral, who founded a settlement in what was Huntington Beach after the destruction of the Cathedral in Long Beach and the end of the Unity project in 2162. Though they tend to keep to themselves, there are still some devout Unity believers who kidnap caravans travelling along the former 405 freeway in order to adopt them into the cult and keep the population afloat (They don’t have any FEV to make Super Mutants). Population: 100.
-Irvine: Largely an NCR base centered around the former John Wayne Airport, though there are a decent amount of civilians who have set up shop to cater to the large soldier population. The 452nd Battalion is stationed at the airport, though their numbers have dwindled due to transfers to the Mojave. This has made them unable to respond to the Camp Pendleton Raiders. Population (including soldiers): 2,000.
-San Clemente: A “Ghoul only” settlement ran by wealthy pre-war Ghouls who maintain the area. Despite the exclusivity, it has maintained a population of over 1,000 mainly by bringing in other Ghouls from Orange County and the surrounding area. Mainly keeps to themselves though they accept caravans for trade, though less have been showing up due to the threat of the Camp Pendelton Raiders.

Does anyone else have absolutely no idea what they want to do with their life? And I don't just mean career wise, I also mean other life choices like buying a house, etc.
I feel like I don't know who I am. I am very influenced by people around me. And society tells us we must work full time to earn enough money to either rent or buy a house and pay bills. Then take just a few short breaks from work for holidays.
I was in a relationship and we bought a house, I had a full time job, and I hated it. I mean, I wasn't happy in the relationship and have since left, but I also was very bored. I didn't see the point in my life, I didn't see the point in working for some random company majority of the time and just having a few breaks for me. Basically living for the weekend. I had thoughts about wanting to travel or live in a van.
I made the decision to leave the relationship which meant I had to move back in to my parents. I then met someone else who had a completely different outlook on life. They had already lived in different countries and they were keen to live in a van, or build a self sufficient home and believed we shouldn't live for the weekend. So I was like, great, that sounds the dream.
But then I got my autism diagnosis, things went downhill for me, I felt like I couldn't travel or even go out and ended up getting another WFH full time job and living for the weekend (still living at my parents). And I started believing that's what I want again, I want a house, a pet, a full time job earning decent money, holidays.
But I don't know if that is what I want, or what society says I should do. Im only surrounded by people who live this way. And I'm a sponge, so I'm easily influenced by people around me.
Or is it because I'm a realistic person, so the idea of not living this kind of life is scary and I think, well how will I have enough money!? Money shouldn't be important though, I just worry because of how expensive everything is these days.
I am going on a bit now. Basically I don't know what I want, or how I think I should live my life. Which I think is partly down to being autistic and living in a world not designed for me.
Does anyone else feel the same way? Thanks!

I hope today finds you well, and I hope you take a moment to read this.
I am here to accept full responsibility for what I did. I don't think you're blaming yourself, but know that I understand: none of it was your fault, it is entirely on me.
I'm not here to ask forgiveness, because even if you forgive me, I still won't find a way to forgive myself. I caused you too much pain at a time you were already suffering and needed my support.
I'm not asking for your friendship, because I think I have destroyed any possibility of bringing that back. I will simply accept the fact that my actions have cost me the friendship of someone I loved and treasured dearly.
I tried to diagnose my own problems and do self therapy, but that was a complete failure. I did not understand myself well enough, and I didn't have the tools to fix myself either. As an adult, it was my responsibility to seek professional help to heal my childhood trauma long before this happened, but I waited too late. I am getting that help now.
Anxiety is supposed to be a way we prepare ourselves to face danger on the rare occasion it comes our way. Some anxiety will prepare the body to react quickly to danger. An overload of anxiety will shut down your ability to reason. It affects the brain at a neurological level, as it depletes some neurotransmitter chemicals and floods the brain with others. I am literally unable to reason until my anxiety is reduced back down below overload levels. My father was an abusive monster, so I grew up with constant threat of violence. I have learned that because of this constant threat, my brain was trained to be in a state of anxiety all the time. I have been living in a state of constant moderate distress for so many years now that it's just my 'normal' state, so it is a much shorter path for me to go from moderate to overloaded with anxiety. The only time I felt at peace was with you. I grew very dependent on your presence to ease my distress. It was wrong for me to place that kind of burden on you, and if I had known that was what I was doing I would have stopped. I just knew that I felt wonderful and happy with you.
Late March happened. I was already feeling more than my normal anxiety due to other factors in my life. You came to me very upset because your mother was planning an arranged marriage for you and an April wedding without telling you. I cared very much about you, and still do, so seeing you so upset about another massive manipulation by your mother filled me with more anxiety. Then you texted in the middle of the night telling me you were so depressed. My stress levels went further up. I reached my anxiety breaking point when you told me you were going to get married to keep the peace in the family. You sounded like a prisoner, resigned to the fact that you were being sentenced to life in prison, not like a woman looking forward to marrying the love of her life. My heart broke for you, and my anxiety levels reached overload. I couldn't think. My head was filled with incoherent gray fog, and my responses were limited to being a panicked child. Worse for me, I knew that your husband, whome you hadn't even met yet, would take all of your time and attention, so I would lose my only friend and my only source of peace. My actions during those few days were shameful, embarrassing, disturbing, and destructive. I wish I could erase the pain and distress I caused you. I am sorry you had to suffer from my problems. But I cannot change the past. I can only put everything I am into healing, learning, and growing up so I never do this to anyone again. For the next several months, with my therapists help, I will be focused completely on healing and maturing. He has a lot of experience helping people who grew up in abusive home like mine, so he knows exactly what he's doing. I won't be looking for friends, because I won't trust myself to be able to be a good friend to anyone for a while.
We used to be friends. You once cared about me until I destroyed it all. Maybe it will help you to know that some benefit will come from the suffering I put you through.
I thank you with all my heart for what you shared with me. I wish only the best for you, you deserve a good marriage.

Greetings and Salutations! Just dropping the next few chapters below, these were fun to read :) Enjoy!
Ch. 11

• “What the hell happened to you?” LOL if Rhys becomes Lucien 2.0 I think I'll be ok with that
  
• Wait so if he wanted Rhys could just channel his power and go scorched earth??? How are there not any contingencies in place for that and everyone is just relying on his whim?
  
• Whoa so Feyre has been making some crazy progress with her shields if Rhys is blocked out 90% of the time…hooked on phonics with Rhys has really been paying off for her
  
• Eyyyyyy Feyre is reading a book! Look how far she's come
  
• Bro, why is Rhys always asking why Feyre doesn't insult him anymore? Is he into verbal BDSM or something? I guess being Amarantha's toy did a number on him. I bet this guy is a freak in the bed
  
• Oh damn so she has water bending skills too?! So wateice, fire, wind, psychic abilities…just needs earth and heart and she can finally become Captainess Planet
  
• Bro, Tamlin’s number one flaw is that he’s straight up not a good communicator. He thinks he can just scowl his way to victory with Feyre and Rhys, and they're not about that life
  
• I do feel kinda bad for Tammy, I bet he feels like he's getting cucked by Mr. Cavill (completely understandable as well)
  

Ch. 12

• NICE Feyre is just plowing through all the books in the library…WAY better hobby than being a lukewarm painter. That being said, I won't say no to a Bob Ross faerie to help Feyre improve her skills
  
• Dude Tammy is still shutting Feyre out?! This guy is completely oblivious to the fact that he's losing her slowly
  
• WTF is Feyre turning part crow now?
  
• “How long have the claws been appearing?” bro…nothing gets past Luke the Duke. NOTHING
  
• Dude…Lucien can really do no wrong, am I right? This MAN is advocating for Feyre left and right constantly to have her be trained cause he sees the bigger picture. Everyone's goal in life should be to find a friend that'll be in your corner the way Lucien is with Feyre. HAVE FEYRE BECOME THE AVATAR, YOU COWARDS
  
• Really. Tammy is still giving her short answers and no new info? How did that work out last time in the first book?
  
• I mean at this point just continue compromising? Just be a good girl and stay in the palace, then when you go to Rhysand's place go balls out and start training to be the avatar over there. You probably could even bargain and say give me one full month at the Night Court hyperbolic time chamber, I'll become a god, then the bargain is complete and everyone bows to me, HIGH LADY FEYRE
  
• I'm pretty sure Feyre is gonna learn Winnowing right? Then she'll be able to come and go as she pleases
  
• WTF is happening, is Feyre getting kidnapped?
  
• OH SHIT Alis coming in clutch!!! Are her and Mor pen pals or something?
  
• Back to the Night Court!
  

Ch. 13

• LMAO Rhysand is looking at Feyre rubbing his temples and thinking “I'm too old for this shit”
  
• She can control darkness too?! Please tell me she summons Charlie Murphy to the battlefield in a future book
  
• I mean, at the rate she's revealing her powers she's making Avatar Aang look like a baby back bitch
  
• Oh damn Feyre said it. She's not going back! I think comparing being trapped in the palace to being trapped under the mountain did it for her
  
• What's with the cloak and dagger shit with Rhys? Feyre can't mention anything to anyone about the Night Court? Interesting, I'm wondering if this court is suffering greatly from the Illyrians
  
• Noice Rhys treating her like an equal rather than property. Honestly, not a hard concept at all.
  
• Onward to Velaris, city of stars! Sounds dope
  
• Wait, Feyre took a bath and got ready in 10 minutes? I call bullshit
  
• LMAO Rhys said “that was 15 minutes.” I should just keep reading before commenting lol
  
• Hold on, Rhys has callused hands? From what? I can't imagine this guy doing any type of manual labor or holding a BF sword for fighting, this cat uses mind bullets. Is that even a turn on, having callused hands?
  
• So, they both arrive in a lived-in home that's inside a city…and that's shocking to Feyre…why?!? Does she expect city residents to just live in the sewers or something? This woman I swear…
  
• Oh wow that's the end of part 1! We're just moving right along aren't we
  

Ch. 14

• Oooh Part 2 The House of Wind?! Day Court maybe???
  
• Wut we’re in Rhysand's home? Like the one he grew up in???
  
• Oh shit Rhys has a family? I thought there was no one left except him and Mor
  
• I…have no idea what's going on right now lol. The twins live in Rhys's house, are they related to him? And two Illyrians are just banging on his door…can they come in?
  
• Ohhhh one of them is Cassian! Interesting
  
• Inner circle…like the circle of trust? How does one come to be a part of this?
  
• Hmm, so Rhys saved this entire city before he became High Lord…I need deets ASAP
  

Ch. 15

• So Velaris sounds like heaven on Prythian.
  
• “...his blue eyes were as ruthless as the churning winter sea in the distance.” Wait, I thought he has violet eyes?? Can he change their color??? *Sigh some Faes have all the luck
  
• This place really sounds like Kalm from FF VII Rebirth…gorgeous town
  
• Really want to know how Rhysand saved this city…I'm curious if they know he's the high lord and if he appreciates being treated like a normal citizen
  
• Oh God we're back to Feyre thinking about painting things again…
  
• Also, calm your tits Feyre?! You're getting mad at these people for something they weren't aware of
  
• “My people are blameless.” TRUTH, Rhys
  
• Ooooh a new character has appeared! 2nd in command Amren! Steal her shit and she'll roast your balls off
  
• Wow Rhys is the most powerful high lord in history….good to get confirmation on this, I felt it was always hinted at so far
  
• What a weird time to warg into Rhysand lol, guess she can't control this ability
  
• I was just thinking…if Feyre’s real kinky or doesn't have this ability down yet once she and Rhys bang they can warg into each other's bodies and see them screwing themselves and really start having some crazy sex sessions
  
• Oh interesting, so psychic Faes are called Daemati. As in, ‘Daemati’ invade your mind, or ‘Daemati’ not LOLOL. I'm keeping that dad joke
  
• “...or maybe I had broken it, when I shoved that dagger into the hearts of two innocent fae and their blood warmed my hands.” Don't you DARE forget what you did to the Beddors, Feyre! Remember Clare!!!!
  
• Bro, Rhysand is going to carry Feyre as he flies in with his wings LOL. What a sight that would be
  
• What do those wings look like by the way? I know we've gotten tiny glimpses and hints..like black, bat wings. And I'm assuming wing span size ABSOLUTELY matters *wink wink
  
• Ooooh what a cool flying scene; all this needs is “A whole new world” playing in the background.
  
• Aw sad day, Rhys loved his mommy :/
  
• “Each chair fashioned, I noted, to accommodate wings.” What does that even look like? No backs to the chairs, or the backs are shorter so the wings can rest over the back when they sit? I gotta know this for my immersion!
  
• Cute little penny for your thoughts scene between Rhys and Feyre…she's completely out of the woods with Tammy now.
  
• Let the Illyrian Dinner Feast begin!
  

Lots of fun developments in these chapters! Excited to read on and see how the feast goes. Thanks for reading!

I am an American that is married to a Canadian. We have filed the CR1 spousal visa for my Canadian husband to obtain American citizenship and relocate here.
My situation: The lease on my apartment ends in October and we’ve been discussing not re-signing, putting most of my belongings in storage and I would move in with my family. Shortly after, I would drive up to Canada with my cat to stay with my husband for up to 6 months on my passport, then returning to the US with my husband to find a new home together.
My job situation: I work fully remote for a US company, all business and financials are handled in the US and my boss has given me the green light to temporarily work from Canada for up to 6 months.
So my biggest concern are these: 1) I’m worried about strong ties to the US. With me no longer having a lease, I’m wondering what I could provide as strong ties to the US to prove I will absolutely return and have no intentions of moving to Canada. Would the CR1 Spousal visa paperwork showing we’ve applied for my Canadian husband to obtain American citizenship be strong enough? Since I’ll be moving in with family after my lease runs out, would a temporary “lease” agreement with the homeowner suffice?
2) I feel like it’s inevitable that I will be questioned over work due to wanting to stay in Canada for a long period of time, should I be concerned about this? I will be staying with my husband and he has a full time job so he will be supporting me and my needs while there, but I do have a remote job that I plan to do while visiting my husband. I’ve heard about digital nomad, and I believe I fall under that category. Am I able to work for my US based company remotely as a digital nomad strictly using my American passport, or is there a different visa I would need? How should I address this with the border agent if they ask about work?
Thank you for any and all advice in advance. This will be my first time ever crossing the border so I’m looking to be as prepared as possible.

For context, graduated in late 2020 with graduation delayed from COVID. Only Level II experiences in Home Health and Schools, was unable to get settings that I wanted but that couldn't be controlled. Was going to the my capstone in acute care with stroke patients but that had to switch to an online based capstone with COVID. Failed boards the first time and took till April 2021 to pass. Wanted to be picky and get into hospitals and outpatient for full time positions, was able to get into some interviews but ultimately not the jobs. Was able to only get PRN in LTC in a veterans home in Dec 2021. Thankfully someone left and census was sky high so I was getting full time hours off PRN rate so that was amazing for like 4 months. June 2022, got a nice job in Subacute/LTC with a nonprofit organization. They got bought out to a for profit organization in Jan 2023. We got contracted to a really big, unpopular company that ran us to the ground and I had to leave this past Dec because I would have been burnt out with everything (group/concurrents, decreased time to eval, too many patients, etc). Not to mention my loss in really nice benefits such as insurance and PTO.
Currently, working off PRNs in an ALF and my first PRN in the vet home averaging around 20-25hrs a week. Have been trying to get in acute, Inpatient, and Outpatient which are settings I'm more passionate about. No problems with getting interviews. EVERY single one up to this point has cited "lack of experience" in the setting as a reason for not getting the position. Basically, how the hell do I even get to that point if no one will give me the chance. I have felt that subacute/LTC having a wide variety of diagnoses would be the perfect stepping stone to get to other settings but it doesn't seem that way. I have been able to experience both ortho and neurological cases but places seem to want me to be in a setting I am actually specialized in. I have been able to get job offers in other SNFs just to see where my current market value is and see how other companies benefits stack up, but I really don't want to end up there and just be stuck. Sorry for the long rant, I'm just pissed

I don't really know why I'm writing this ... I think it's because I've tried to explain it to my uncle but all he said is that I should get my addiction under control and stop forgetting to take my meds.
I can't blame him. You see... I have a history. I've lost it in the past , twice actually. I'm not here to talk about it , but I think it's important to lay this down first. So you can understand.

I've been told something's wrong with my brain, maybe I was born this way, maybe I've been through too much. That my mother was an addict, she'd cut ties with her family for 10 years when she had me. That where she had been and who my father was, is was very unclear. She was part of a community in the forgotten part of the nearest big city when she died. I was there when it happened.
My uncle Sean and Aunt Maggie became my guardians just before my 5th birthday and I'm still with him 20 years later. Maggie left the ranch a few weeks ago after an amicable divorce, I never understood why they were together anyway she was always working somewhere, traveling a lot. I was closer to him and his sturdy way of life.

When I first arrived at the ranch, I was in a bad shape. I got better thanks to him but when I reached thirteen, all the memories from my early childhood suddenly came back. I started having flashbacks. My memories came back, but they came back wrong.

I had been told that my mother had died of an untreated infection. Yet in my dreams, I saw her , again and again , in a pool of blood. An then... Then it came. The... Thing. I won't describe it. It kind of triggers something in me that I really don't need right now.

I've been told that what happened next was so traumatic that my brain made up a monster, a fiction , to make sense of what I was seeing and not processing.
This ... Thing started obsessing me and during my early teenage years I focused all my energy on finding what it was and proving it happened. That a monster did kill and mutilated my mother. My nightmares were so bad that I stopped sleeping. I drank so much energy drinks that I ended up in the hospital twice with severe dehydration.

Thankfully, I got better. I started working more and more with my uncle's horses. I think it's why he employed me, he saw how manual work and caring for the animals helped. I even got my first girlfriend around my 17th year. I was prom king. Who would have thought?
But then... She had a cheerleading accident. In front of me. And I lost it again. I won't go into details but she broke her neck during half-time and once again... The way she fell, folded and screamed. I couldn't process. It was IT. It'd shapeshifted to get to her. I'm ashamed of it but I became violent. Looking for it franticly. Screaming non sense and talking made up words. I had to be sedated. She made it alive, but she never wanted to see me again. I was accused by pretty much everyone to make the accident all about myself. And they were kind of right....

Now you know how I came to be the " crazy" guy. I have a bit of a drinking problem too to be honest... You see I never went back to high school. I started working full time at the ranch when I came by, and sometimes, it gets lonely. It's not rare to find me passed out in the hay in the early morning in the summer. And what can I tell you... I know I shouldn't. I know it's "bad" . But I love those nights. I put music , cuddle with my dog and just look at the cold bright stars, drinking beer until they start spinning.

It's because of this bad habit that I realized something was wrong with the horses. You see, contrary to the movies, horses are pretty silent. They don't neigh unless you separate them from their best mate or bring food. And that night... The night it all started. They wouldn't stop. I could hear them galloping and snorting. I wondered if there was a stray dog but they were used to dogs. I was a bit worried. Horses get stupid when they are afraid and we had a big show coming, it wasn't the time so sprain a leg. What really troubled me was my dog. He seemed ... Weird.
Max was a pit mix my uncle had rescued when I was 15. He only woke when I got up and walked a bit to look at the paddocks. That's when I realised the moon behind me. It was huge, and red. I wondered if I had ever seen it so close and so red before. I looked at Max The white of his eyes showed and he started whining. I had never heard him make this noise. Ever.

I looked at my phone. It was quarter to three. I took a pitchfork to be safe and walked toward the clubhouse. We kept a shotgun there in a locker. The horses kept going crazy and max's tail was stiff. I was walking fast but carefully in the darkness when the music reached me. A chant. A low chant. I kind of felt it too... Like a ... vibration.
It was coming from the yearlings field near the forest patch, on the opposite direction of the clubhouse. My horse was in this field. I backtracked immediately and rushed toward the sound as I dialled my uncle. Off course he didn't answer. He didn't live on the property anymore but a few miles away. I left a message, whispering. " I'm at the stable, something weird ‘s happening. I think they're people messing with horses I'm going to see. I think you should come , I don't know...Call me back.". The weird chant buzzed in the background, louder, as if more people had joined. I saw the glow of the fire before I passed the last building. It rose , under the bloody moonlight. Dark figures circled around it. Slowly. The horses seemed to have retreated at the other end of the pasture and I was relieved. Until I saw it. The figure at the centre of this dark carousel. " What the f are those creeps doing" escaped my lips.
blazing fury filled me , like a white iron like a white hot blade blinding me . "HEYYYY" I screamed at the top of lungs. " WHAT ARE YOU DOING !? ". The figures stopped and turn toward me. I was running now , my knuckles going white around the pitchfork's stick. Max was growling. A deep growl. His hair high upon his backbone. The figure, still pretty far did not move. I could see their heavy hooded cloaks. " what kind of sick pricks are those " I muttered. " HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY" I screamed again, louder than I ever thought I could scream. And then I saw him. Gun.
Gun was my uncle's favourite horse. His old stallion's spitting image. The young horse was lying in front of the fire behind the intruders.
"WHAT DID YOU DO! I'M CALLING THE COPS!!!!". I stopped and was dialling when a figure detached itself from the group and advanced. It seemed to ... float? It moved toward Max and I... so silently.
The burning rage in veins turned cold , and heavy. I opened my mouth but nothing crossed my lips. Suddenly, Max jumped. He growled in a way I hope to never hear any dog do again. A desperate, furious growl. A life or death sound. A war cry... His warm blood spattered on my face. He... Honestly I don't know what happened at that moment. Something lied bloody on the ground but I couldn't even have told that it used to be a dog, even less Max. Acid tears filled my eyes as I realized my mouth was still open. I was tasting him.
I wanted to scream, to run, to just get swallowed by the earth and yet I did nothing at all but stare at the floating silhouette. It was so tall. " Come, my child". " We were waiting for you, we knew you'd come, Your father told us you'd be here when we'd call".
I heard those words, but I wouldn't be able to tell you anything about the thing who spoke them. I say thing because it didn't have a voice. It... Buzzed. Like... a cello.
Suddenly... I floated too. Panick seized me. Like a trapped raccoon in my
chest it dug its claws, scratching furiously my closed throat.
" Your father said you were ready. We will prepare you." I was now in front of the crackling blaze. the other figures circling me. Smiling Men and woman welcomed me. On their faces they all wore a similar mark. a cross covering their eyes horizontally, and their nose and mouth vertically. Their hands... Their hands were still dripping with gun's inside. Gun... Was ... opened.
" A necessary sacrificed" whispered a woman, still smiling. " I know you liked him very much... I'm sorry..." " I could have taken yours, but I knew you wouldn't have forgiven me'. Her voice. .." Aunt Maggie?' I croaked. Her eyes shone with a mad light. " Gosh do you look like your mother tonight... She'd be so proud. Her baby boy..." .
The tall figure made a gesture and I spined and found myself looking at the sky. I thought I'd fallen but... I wasn't touching the ground...
My aunt continued speaking." She was just like you the first time ... So... naive, so afraid.. She was only 16! That was our mistake you see, she wasn't ready for her destiny yet when she joined us... That's why we waited for you."
The chant , the low buzzing chant rose once again. The people around me started walking in a circle around me. I was just above Gun's body.
One, by one, they buried they hands in the belly of the horse and traced the cross on my face. I sealed my lips as tight as I could as the warm blood covered my face. Through the blood and tears I recognize faces. A nurse from the hospital. A teacher. The coffeeshop barista. My psychiatrist... I closed my eyes.
It was a nightmare. It couldn't be anything but a nightmare.
Yet the smell of the horse's inside and the crackling fire still reached me as they started ripping my clothes off.
" This is not real" I whispered. " This is not real, this is not real THIS IS NOT real" I screamed weakly.
'Oh , My dear I'm so sorry ' whispered my aunt. I should have told you earlier... But Dr Carter said it was better to let you grow up a bit first. He said it help you keep the secrets if you were afraid of them. I'm sure you don't feel this way, but it was an honour to watch your mother ascend the way she did. Her agony was the most beautiful thing she could have hoped for. You were supposed to ascend with her but she ruined it". " Slut" groaned a middle aged woman before spitting on the floor.
" She was my best friend you know... I thought I knew her. I thought I could trust her. But she lied to me."
"You see, we know you are his son. But... She wasn't a virgin when she was honoured."
She smiled. " It doesn't matter how cruelly she tricked us. You can help us find the perfect girl."
One by one, each member traced a symbol on my skin.
" You're so handsome... He'll be so glad. The perfect boy. The perfect vessel."
"It's almost time, Prepare" hissed the tall figure.
" You're going to give him his heir, the one ruler among the realms. You see he can't travel here whenever but you're an anchor my love. Each generation he choses an anchor until he finds one who'll give him THE son, the one who'll die for his freedom. Our freedom."
"QUIET SLAVE AND KNEEL" shrieked the tall figure.
She kneeled right near me, and whispered " You're...". I heard a slash. Aunt Maggie’s face slid horizontally. Her eyes followed me as the upper part of the face slid slowly toward the ground.
" HAIL THE PRINCE".
A chant, colder and louder than never before rose with the crackling flames toward the moon.
" Iä! Shub-Niggurath! The Black Goat of the Woods with a Thousand Young! » chanted the disciples."
Frozen, I watched the blazing sky above and saw a door. A perfect wooden door , in the sky. It slowly cracked open as the crowd turn to hysterics and the chant turned to mad screams.
"MY SOOOOOOOON" The whole earth seemed to split open under the weight of the sound coming from the perfect rectangle of empty darkness in the sky.
And then... I saw... I saw what I had tried to forget for twenty-years. I saw those split red eyes and their evil glare. I saw the iron hooves at the end of too many legs. I saw the tentacles who fled my mother with their thousand beaks. Everything all at once, I saw it shift, from an odious form to a more loathsome one. I burned in a way I'll never be able to describe.
I woke up two weeks ago in the nearest hospital. I was found on the ground, surrounded by the yearlings, the corpse of gun and some remains of Max. My uncle explained to me that I had found a bear feasting on Gun, that Max must have attacked it and I'd fainted or been knocked out trying to scare it away. Laying lifeless had saved me. I didn't speak of what I saw at the hospital. I knew better now. I've tried to explain to my uncle why I had to move out to the big city. That I had a mission now. That I had never been crazy and that I shouldn't have been afraid.
I know now that I'm blessed. You see he thinks I'm just having another episode, that it’s a "manic" episode and I should go back to the clinic, but I know better now. I am special. I am. And he can be too. Anyway... He'll be whether he joins or not. You'll all be. Because he is coming. He 'll bless us all. Because you see, I know I can find her and I'll give him the perfect door. A door to let him in. A door to let all of him in. He'll honour us all, all at once.
" Iä! Shub-Niggurath! The Black Goat of the Woods with a Thousand Young! »

Burner account. I (17M) believe my teacher (30M) has a crush on me. This teacher is from South America and moved to the US this year to teach health education at my school. He’s super nice and most kids love him.
There were some rumors that he may be gay. After pondering the possibility, I decided that he most likely is gay. I won’t get into why, but just assume he’s gay.
I’ve since thought about our interactions and became uncomfortable. I don’t find anything inherently wrong with a gay teacher being friendly with a straight male student, but I wondered if it was possible he was more than friendly.
For context, my school has had a teacher about every year for the last 5 years who got into trouble with a student, so this wouldn’t be an uncommon occurrence. My school created some policies restricting intimate interactions between students and teachers to prevent future scandals.
Since my epiphany, I became more cognizant of our interactions. I noticed that his face lights up every time he sees me, perhaps more than it does when he sees others. He often hugs me and he claims it’s because I’m graduating and he’ll miss me, but I haven’t seen him hug another student. One time, he leaned in for a big hug I wasn’t expecting and the principal saw it. I was already uncomfortable, and I can’t imagine what the principal thought of it.
Another time, he offered me a ride home, which is completely against school policy. When I told him the school doesn’t allow it and I wouldn’t want him to get in trouble, he half-jokingly said that I’m no longer a student since I finished classes (although I didn’t graduate at the time).
It’s important to note that I like him as a person and I enjoy talking to him. He seldom makes me uncomfortable but when he does, I wonder if he has a crush on me. And if he does, that would be quite uncomfortable for me.
There are a few possibilities here: 1. He only likes me as a friend because I reciprocate his friendliness (despite him making me uncomfortable sometimes). He may even be straight in this case. 2. I’m delusional/missing evidence and he treats other students the same way. He can also be straight in this case. 3. He has a gay crush on me.
How do I figure out what’s going on. What do I do, if anything?
TL;DR: New teacher (30M) who’s probably gay is overly friendly to me (17M). It makes me uncomfortable and he may have a crush on me.

Burner account. I (17M) believe my teacher (30M) has a crush on me. This teacher is from South America and moved to the US this year to teach health education at my school. He’s super nice and most kids love him.
There were some rumors that he may be gay. After pondering the possibility, I decided that he most likely is gay. I won’t get into why, but just assume he’s gay.
I’ve since thought about our interactions and became uncomfortable. I don’t find anything inherently wrong with a gay teacher being friendly with a straight male student, but I wondered if it was possible he was more than friendly.
For context, my school has had a teacher about every year for the last 5 years who got into trouble with a student, so this wouldn’t be an uncommon occurrence. My school created some policies restricting intimate interactions between students and teachers to prevent future scandals.
Since my epiphany, I became more cognizant of our interactions. I noticed that his face lights up every time he sees me, perhaps more than it does when he sees others. He often hugs me and he claims it’s because I’m graduating and he’ll miss me, but I haven’t seen him hug another student. One time, he leaned in for a big hug I wasn’t expecting and the principal saw it. I was already uncomfortable, and I can’t imagine what the principal thought of it.
Another time, he offered me a ride home, which is completely against school policy. When I told him the school doesn’t allow it and I wouldn’t want him to get in trouble, he half-jokingly said that I’m no longer a student since I finished classes (although I didn’t graduate at the time).
It’s important to note that I like him as a person and I enjoy talking to him. He seldom makes me uncomfortable but when he does, I wonder if he has a crush on me. And if he does, that would be quite uncomfortable for me.
There are a few possibilities here: 1. He only likes me as a friend because I reciprocate his friendliness (despite him making me uncomfortable sometimes). He may even be straight in this case. 2. I’m delusional/missing evidence and he treats other students the same way. He can also be straight in this case. 3. He has a gay crush on me.
How do I figure out what’s going on. What do I do, if anything?
TL;DR: New teacher (30M) who’s probably gay is overly friendly to me (17M). It makes me uncomfortable and he may have a crush on me.

She greeted him with lips and an open mouth before he’d managed to shut the front door; a welcoming home he hadn’t received since they were still dating. The surprise assault nearly caused Mark to stumble backward into the hallway, but he recovered and returned the embrace in kind, relishing the feeling of her body and tongue against his. As she pulled away, he thought he detected a faint aftertaste on her breath—something unnatural hidden underneath, an earthy flavor that reminded him of potting soil. The taste was gone as soon as it had come, and he forgot about it in short order.
“Welcome home, babe,” Tracy said with a smile, and he smiled back.
“Well, that was nice,” he said, while his brain scrambled to attribute any significance to this day, a forgotten birthday or anniversary or any reason at all for the enthusiasm he’d been welcomed home with. He came up empty, conceded defeat and said, “What was that for?”
“I’ve just missed you, is all. I’m glad you’re home.” She was still smiling, her green eyes drinking him in like sunflowers in the first light of the morning. She waited for him to remove his shoes, then took his hand and pulled him into the warm glow of the kitchen and kissed him again in a fervent reminder of their youth. The taste was stronger this time; he thought it familiar but couldn’t place it. Bad breath, perhaps.
They passed through the kitchen into the dark of their living room, lit only by the cool white of the television. An old rerun of Tracy’s favorite sitcom was on, filling the room with bombastic voices and the intervallic laughs of a live studio audience. Mark jumped at the unexpected sight of a figure sitting on the couch—a woman with hands in her lap and an upright posture, her eyes glued to the TV without so much as an acknowledgment of their presence. Her face was a blank slate.
“Oh, sorry, I forgot to tell you Shelby is here,” Tracy said, motioning to her sister. “She wanted to come over and hang out for a while. Her husband has been fucking their underage neighbor. She walked in on them today.”
This tactless and matter-of-fact proclamation shocked Mark almost as much as the news itself. “Oh, Shelby, I’m so sorry,” he said. “Have you talked to the police yet?”
“Don’t worry about it,” Tracy said, waving an apathetic hand before sitting opposite her sister on the couch and patting the spot between them, grinning. “We’re all just going to relax and have a good time right now. Why don’t you come take a seat?”
Mark shifted on his feet but relented and walked over to sit. When he did, Tracy scooted over to him and put a hand on his thigh, whispering in his ear while lightly brushing his cheek with soft lips. It was something she knew he liked, at least when they were alone.
“Don’t you want to have a good time with me?” She said, planting a slow, deliberate kiss in front of his ear, following it up with a dab of her tongue. Her cool breath carried a strange smell to his nose, and the hair on Mark’s arms stood up despite himself. Tracy put a hand between his legs and gave him a firm squeeze.
Mark started like he’d received an electric shock and pulled his wife’s hand away, trying his best to whisper quietly enough for only her to hear. “What the hell are you doing?” he said, shooting a nervous glance at Shelby, who appeared unbothered.
“It’s fine, babe. I just can’t resist you. It’s not my fault you look so good,” Tracy whispered louder than him and tried snaking her hand back onto his crotch. It was all Mark could do to keep her at bay without alerting Shelby outright.
“Your sister is right there,” he said through gritted teeth. “And you just said she’s going through some shit. Just wait until later. You can have anything you want then.”
“Oh, there’s no way I can wait. You’re much too tempting for that. What do you say we go to the bedroom? I’m gonna give you something you’ll never forget.” Tracy moaned audibly and gnashed her teeth so hard Mark recoiled. He turned and looked at her with a bewildered expression, while hers was nothing short of ravenous.
“What is going on?” He asked her. “I’m not comfortable with this at all. Just wait until we’re alone!”
Tracy stood and looked down on him with crossed arms, not bothering to whisper. “I don’t care how comfortable you are. You’re my husband, and you’re going to give me what I want. I have to go to the bathroom. You have until I get back to lighten up and have a good time with me.” She walked to the back of the apartment in a huff.
Mark moved into Tracy’s old spot and stared at the ground. He wasn’t sure how much of that Shelby had seen and heard, but she’d surely heard something, and he had no idea what to say.
“It’s not her.” She spoke so quietly, and Mark had been so consumed with embarrassed thoughts that Shelby’s words didn’t register at first. When he realized she’d said something, he turned to her, and for the first time he noticed that she hadn’t moved since he’d walked in. Not one muscle. Not an inch.
“What did you say?” he asked her.
“It’s not her. She’s dead.”
The clunk of footsteps on the wooden floor in the kitchen preceded Tracy’s arrival, and she walked into the living room with a smile on her face, hands clasped behind her back.
Marks stomach sunk into a pit of ice at the sight of her hungry smile. “Alright, babe,” she said. “Let’s go to the bedroom. Shelby will be okay here alone for a little bit. I want you too badly to wait anymore.” Her smile widened, and a trail of green liquid ran from the corner of her mouth down her chin. She caressed her neck with her right hand, massaging slowly. “I want you, babe. You need to come give in to me. I won’t let you get away.”
Mark’s throat tightened as he turned to Shelby, who remained as motionless as ever and said nothing. He looked into the lustful eyes of Tracy, who winked and beckoned him to follow before walking back to their bedroom.
He didn't move at first. He felt like a python had squeezed the breath from his body, and he gasped and put a hand on his chest, attempting to gain control of his breathing.
“Come to me, dear husband!” A cry from the bedroom made him jump. But at these words, he accepted his fate. She was his wife, and she needed him. He would always love her.
He stood and walked into the kitchen. The apartment was dark, with the only light emanating from their bedroom, which sat with the door half-open at the end of the hallway.
Mark braced himself and walked towards it.

I got diagnosed in January of '22 and I am learning more about myself and the way my brain works every day. I've always struggled with school, specifically test taking. I transferred out of a university after having spent 3 and a half years there, to a school close to home. I come from a high-achieving and successful immigrant household where I constantly feel like I am letting down my family and everyone else around me. My first semester at my new uni was incredibly rough because I just transferred there, moved back home to my parents, and started working two new jobs on top of a full-time course load. Not surprisingly, I only passed two of my five classes so my GPA was immediately tanked and I was warned of academic probation. In my second semester (fall 2023), I took minimal classes and quit my job to focus on school. Despite all my efforts, I only managed to pass my classes with Cs and one D. My GPA increased but not by much. I was placed on academic probation. I just finished my third semester last week, where I got one A-, two Bs, and one F. The class I failed was very difficult and I tried very hard to pass my exams but I ended up scoring very low on all of them. My GPA was not great by it still increased from the previous semesters. Today, I received an email from my university letting me know that despite my grades improving because my GPA did not exceed 2.0, I am being marked for dismissal. I have the option of appealing for an extended semester of probation, which entails me having to fill out forms and meet with multiple boards to plead my case. I will be applying for the appeal but I am scared that they will reject my case. I will have to take a one-year break and reapply to study at the institution. I was supposed to graduate in May of 23 originally and I was hoping to graduate in December this year when I finish the remaining classes for my degree. But now, it looks like the goalpost is moving again. I'm catastrophizing since I can't be sure that I'll get rejected for the appeal, but I don't have much hope or faith in myself anymore. I am struggling to find motivation to keep going, to keep trying. I'm struggling to make sense of my life and I feel like I've failed. This is all being made worse by the fact that my aging grandparents are issuing ultimatums that they will not visit my parents here in the States until I graduate, my parents are constantly bringing up the fact that I'm at an age where our culture and society expect me to be married soon, and I'm secretly seeing someone from outside our community who is highly accomplished and I'm convinced that he's not gonna want anything to do with a failure like me.

Context: I am 26 years old, have a B.Sc. in food science, live in the USA, and have been working full-time in the food industry for about 2.5 years. Both jobs have been in product development: first R&D for a CPG company, and then applications for a flavor house.
I have not been satisfied with the work-life balance at either job– specifically the amount of PTO available to me. Is that what people mean when they say "work-life balance"? Help translate corporate language for me please haha.
At Job #1, I was allowed 10 days of vacation and 5 sick days to start, which became 13 days of vacation and 5 sick days in my second year. At my current one, I'm allowed 14 days PTO total with no distinction between planned (vacation) and unplanned (sick). There are also two "floater" days which I think are meant to be for holidays not already granted by the company, although this doesn't do much for me since I'm Jewish. The Jewish calendar doesn't totally sync up with the Gregorian calendar, and we have a lot of holidays, so every year we likely have more than two Jewish holidays per fall outside the weekends.
In short: went from 15 total days PTO to 16 total days PTO.
This hardly seems like enough to me. My senior coworkers are able to take an entire month off to visit their families abroad or across the country, and still have leftover PTO for more vacations and illnesses. I know a senior coworker in a European location of my same company gets 45 total days of PTO.
I would really like the kind of arrangement that some of my friends with tech jobs have, where as long as you finish your work on time you can have basically unlimited PTO. It seems like a slippery slope, but much more appealing than what I currently have. But I digress.
Is it because I'm in the food industry, which is fast-paced? Is it because I'm in the US? Is this just how it is for early-career scientists? I haven't even talked about being able to work from home, which would be amazing as well. It wouldn't be time off, but it could help me be flexible with location when needed. Since at least half of my work is on the bench, it's hard to work remotely.
What I actually wrote this post for: Does anyone have suggestions for ways I could pivot my career into something less hectic than product development? I've thought about going into regulation but I'm not sure if that would be better or how to go about it.
Thanks for reading. I know this was a bit of a scattered post, but if you have any wise words about any of the things I've said I would appreciate that.

I recently found out that person who I trusted my savings to make investments has fled the country and is currently being sued by 8 other people for not paying back what he owes. Now, I'm feeling like an idiot
For some context, I (32 f) live in an underdeveloped Latin American country. I've worked since I graduated highschool in so many different places from family businesses, retail stores, advertising companies, and I'm currently working as a LS teacher. I mostly live paycheck to paycheck, but I had managed to save a little bit of money with some additional projects, around $4.5K, which may not sound like a lot, but is half my yearly salary, so, for me, it is.
Last year, I decided I wanted to invest that money instead of having it in my bank account. On the one hand, because I wanted it to generate some more money. On the other, because the country were I live in is currently experiencing a massive security crisis that has us, common citizens, living in fear. It's not rare to hear stories of people whose bank accounts have been ransacked by criminals through violent and coercive acts.
As I don't know how to invest or were to do it, I contacted a friend of my boyfriend (let's call him AJ) who worked in one of this investment funds or whatever they are called and asked about it. I had heard that some other friends had made some money through him. That, and the fact that we knew him and his family made me trust him. At first, at least.
While we were still talking business, he started to become pushy and to ask me repeatedly for the money, I told him I needed to wait and check the documents and all. I didn't like that, and had a bit of a bad gut feeling, but finally I assumed that the pushy part, was just him being himself (as he is known for being an annoying person). After a couple of days, I decided it seemed legit, signed a contract and wired the money. It was supposed to be for a full year, so I waited patiently. The year ended a couple of days ago so I tried reaching out to him, but his number was disconnected and his Whatsapp deactivated. Then, I searched for his wife, whose social media I followed and noticed I couldn't find her. Through some digging up, I was able to find a Facebook account with a different name. With that account, she had posted furniture for sale. That's when I started getting suspicious, because a lot of people are selling all their stuff to migrate due to lack of safety in our home country. At that point, I called my boyfriend to inquire about this friend and he told me he hadn't seen or talked to him for a couple of months, neither did the rest of their friends in common.
At that point, I went through all the information I could find online and turns out that his businesses, which were supposedly going pretty well, hence the lavish lifestyle he and his wife had, in fact didn't make a lot of money. And then, I checked the local judicial database, just to discover he had a total of 8 open cases for not giving paying back money to his investors.
I was devastated. I guess that it might take me a two to three years to save that amount again, and that's if there are no unpredictable expenses through the month. I had some plans for this year, like replacing my car and getting a minor surgery I've been postponing, which I don't know if I will be able to accomplish. My boyfriend consoled me and promised me he was going to talk to his family to ask how they can pay me back.
My SIL is best friends with one of AJ's sisters, so we asked if she knew anything about him. Which she replied "Yeah, I heard he and his family had to flee the country because they were in trouble, just one of the sisters stayed here". Through last activity in WhatsApp and other social media, I can guess they left last month.
So now my fears came true. I don't think I'll ever see my money again. But, even though this sucks tremendously, what's worse is how guilty and dumb I feel. At some point I had this gut feeling, but didn't trust my own instincts, and decided to trust someone who wasn't worthy. I can't believe I was scammed this way. I considered myself a smart, put together person, but know I'm insecure about my own capacity.
Talking to my boyfriend and one of my best friends has helped me feel better, but I'm unwilling to let other close people know about what happened, because I'm afraid they will think I'm stupid. I don't even know if taking legal action is worth it, as it might cost more that the actual amount. The people I could consult about this for free are the lawyers in my family, but it's just too embarrassing to let them know how easily I was scammed, as when I doubled checked the contract I noticed some sketchy things that I hadn't noticed at the time.
I guess I'm here just to vent some more, as I don't think I will tell the rest of my family and friends in the near future.

I don’t have any IRL friends in a similar mom/work situation and I need to celebrate!!!
The past year I’ve been leaving the house at 6:30am for a 25 minute commute to daycare then 15 commute to my job.
Then in the afternoon, 15 minutes back to daycare and a 35+ minute commute home.
Our girl just hit 2. This year has been the most physically exhausting year of my life, and my pregnancy was bad. The lack of sleep, the teething, the daycare illnesses. No time because we are ALWAYS trying to beat traffic to get back home.
My husband is a very involved parent but takes a train 1 hour each way for his commute to work, so I have to do drop off and pick up. (Not looking for advice)
And we JUST got an email that we got a spot in a daycare a 5 minute walk from our home. Dad will be able to do drop off now! I am in SHOCK and so incredibly grateful and happy.
Her current daycare is good, but the driving and logistics is SO hard.
I can’t believe I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. We were on this waitlist for 2 YEARS!
Sorry this is like a positive VENT! I am just ust so damn grateful. Working Mom life is hard and this is just the thing I needed. I hope y’all get some good news or a break soon too.

General

Name: Rango
Epithet: The Cryptid King, The Jester
Age: 30
Height: 6'5
Race: Clownfish Fishman
Appearance: A clownfish Fishman. He possesses dark orange skin, with black hair and a beard. His hair is generally short. He has white rings around his neck, chest, wrists and ankles, as well as a similarly colored vertical marking on his left arm. This marking bears the appearance of a pointing arrow, pointing upwards towards his neck.
Rango wears a sea anemone on his head. It's name is "Noodle". This anemone grants the appearance of Rango wearing a turban and long dreadlocks.
Personality: Rango is a Duplicitous man. To the people of 5-star Island, he is both an idiot and a prankster, always wearing a goofy smile and making light of himself. However, to his enemies, he is known as a cruel man. He is known to "prank", however these gags far more violent.
Skills: An engineer, Rango tends to invent and modify whatever he finds an interest in. He is also a skilled interrogator, and uses his engineering know-how as a means to gather information.
Occupation: Rango is in charge of the Security of an island called 5-star Island, largely serving as the sheriff and prison warden of this island.

Abilities

Fishman Karate: Rango is rather proficient at Fishman Karate, however he is in no way considered an expert.
Weapons/Equipment: Rango's favorite weapon is a harpoon spear, which he uses in lieu of a trident. He keeps this stored in a small satchel which has infinite storage space (More on this in the Devil Fruit sections)
He also possesses a revolver that he himself developed. Rather than firing bullets, however, it can fire any fluid with the force and power greater than that of a cannon. It possesses an improved iron sight for accuracy, as well as a longer barrel. Rango is known to have deadly accuracy with this weapon
Inherent Traits: As a clownfish fishman, Rango is naturally immune to the poisons of Anemone. He is also passively resistant to most other types of poisons, primarily those found in sea life. This resistance has allowed him to develop a symbiotic relationship with an Anemone he named "Noodle" (because it kinda looks like a bowl of ramen)
"Noodle": Noodle is a sentient anemone that sticks to Rango. While it cannot speak, it evidently communicates to Rango in some way. The Anemone seems to have a serious personality, being the voice of reason to Rango's erratic behavior, and actively chastising him when he "Misbehaves".
Interestingly, however, Noodles connection to Rango grants it a level of control over Rango's body. At times, especially when he is unconscious, Noodle will take over and take Rango to safety. This symbiosis has proved especially useful when fleeing under water, as noodle will Drag Rango away through a seabed in a pinch.
Otherwise, Noodle almost exists as an extension of Rango, its tendrils being used as extra arms most of the time. Noodle emits an "Electrotoxin", which is to say that contact with the tendrils will both electrocute and Paralyze a living target
Haki: Observation and limited armament.
Devil Fruit: The Up Up fruit
Rango has eaten the Up Up fruit, a devil fruit that allows him to enhance anything he wants. This is done by creating cyan Arrow-shaped beams. When an object is struck, an arrow pointing upward will be embedded on their body. The "Strength" of the upgrade is directly related to the length of the arrow.
Rango uses this fruit to enhance weaponry, as well as turn normally harmless items into weaponry. For example, he may Upgrade the sharpness and hardness of a toy sword, making it comparable to a high-grade blade. Or he may upgrade an innocuous object like a playing card or Billiard Ball to turn them into deadly projectiles
A weakness of this ability is that an individual can only be upgraded once at a time. Further upgrades will require removing the original and replacing it. However, the scope and scale of an upgrade can encompass multiple aspects, so long as they have some relation. Further, Rango must choose what he upgrades. If he is not aware of something, he cannot upgrade it. This requires him to have a passing knowledge of whatever he is enhancing.
Releasing an upgrade will return the target to their original state

Techniques

All applications of upgrade involve Rango targeting and enhancing a certain aspect of a person, it Even the person as a whole.
Monster-Grade - A technique that is largely used on animals, although it can also be utilized on Zoan-type or humanoid beings. This enhancement amplifies the animalistic properties of a target, turning them into "Yuuma" (jp) or "Cryptids" (en)
Servant-Grade - This is technically not a separate upgrade, but instead an Inherent property of the technique. Any target upgraded by Rango can have their body or mind hijacked by him, forcing them into fulfilling his commands.
Rango has utilized this ability to enslave criminals on his island, forcing them into becoming servants as part of a luxury resort.
As a side effect of this control, individuals will have glowing purple eyes.
Devil-Grade - Rango enhances the devil fruit of a target. This will either enhance the element of a user in the case of element-type fruits or provide an additional property for other such fruits. (Zoan upgrades will apply the Monster-Grade effect)
Health-Grade - An ability that is technically split into two. The first is Recovery Enhancement. This ability will grant an individual a passive ability to heal and mend wounds and injuries. This is rather slow, however, and will generally take a few hours to a day to complete depending on the injury. The second is Full Recovery, In which Rango will "Upgrade" a target to full health, regardless of injury or cause. However, because this change is a result of the upgrade, and not a side bonus as the other, once this upgrade is released, a target will return to their injured state. Generally speaking, this is only best in an emergency.
Stolen-Grade - An offshoot of "Servant-Grade", Rango uses his upgrade ability to hijack an object or weapon that traditionally cannot be used by individuals other than the original user.
Presently, Rango has used this ability to "Steal" a mirror owned by Brulee, granting him free access to her mirror dimension without her knowledge.
Castle-Grade - An upgrade that enhances the natural defense of a target
Hyper-Grade - An Upgrade that enhances the natural speed of a target
Ballistic-Grade - By upgrading a projectile attack, Rango can enhance its power and force of impact. Largely speaking, he uses this mostly on bullets to grant the power of a cannon
Split-Grade - A technique that allows Rango to bypass the original limitation of his fruit. He will split the upgrade into two branches of a whole, allowing him to upgrade multiple related aspects, but at half the original efficacy. This results in the arrow on a target branching into two separate arrows.
Downgrade - an inversion of his ability done by upgrading his own fruit. This allows Rango to instead reduce or weaken aspects of a target, such as their durability or speed.

Equipment

Rango has a series of equipment that he has enhanced to have useful properties
Mirror Portal: A mirror stolen from Brulee. This allows Rango to access his own section of the Mirror dimension. However, he can only enter an exit this section through this mirror, and does not have access to any other nearby mirrors.
Infinite Sachel: A satchel enhanced to have storage space equivalent to that of a large crate. Rango uses this satchel to store his armory of weapons.
Trace-A-Rang: A boomerang that is enhanced to lock onto a target and strike them, and then afterward always return to the user. This makes for the perfect projectile weapon, although it isn't very strong damage-wise.
Boost Rations: Small packages of rations that are enhanced to provide increased vitality and health when eaten.
Perfect Gauntlet: A pair of gauntlets enhanced with the strongest defense enhancements possible. This makes these gauntlets nearly unbreakable.