Parents daycare termination letter

The Ultimate Guide to Applying for a Doctorate of Business Administration Program

2024.05.15 07:53 eimtonline The Ultimate Guide to Applying for a Doctorate of Business Administration Program

Are you a seasoned business professional seeking to elevate your expertise and make a significant impact in the field? A Doctorate in Business Administration (DBA) program might be the perfect next step for you. This prestigious degree equips you with advanced research skills, in-depth knowledge of business theory, and the ability to solve complex organizational problems.
This comprehensive guide delves into everything you need to know about applying for a DBA program in 2024, including:

What is a Doctorate in Business Administration (DBA)?

The highest academic qualification in the discipline of business administration is a Doctorate in Business Administration (DBA), sometimes referred to as a DBA degree. This degree, which is terminal in nature, represents the completion of your official business education. Experienced professionals interested in undertaking unique research that tackles practical business difficulties are the target audience for DBA programs.

Is a DBA Right for You?

Examine your motives and career objectives before choosing to enroll in a DBA program. The following are some signs that you could be a good fit for a DBA:

DBA vs. Ph.D. in Business Administration: Understanding the Differences

Although a doctorate in business administration can be obtained through both DBA and PhD programs, their main objectives are different:

Types of DBA Programs: Full-Time, Part-time, Online Options

The needs of working professionals are met by the variety of forms in which DBA programs are offered:

Key Considerations When Choosing a DBA Program

Choosing the appropriate DBA program is essential. The following are important considerations:

The DBA Application Process: Step-by-Step Guide:

Application to a DBA program needs careful planning. Here's a detailed how-to:

Tips for Strengthening Your DBA Application:

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2024.05.15 07:52 Grand_Valuable_2620 Preschool in Bellandur

Looking for a nurturing environment for your little one in Bellandur? Look no further than Kids Kingdom, your premier destination for daycare, playschool, and preschool services. At Kids Kingdom, we understand the importance of providing a safe, stimulating, and engaging environment for young children to learn and grow. Our preschool in Bellandur is designed to cater to the unique needs of children in their formative years. With a focus on holistic development, we offer a comprehensive curriculum that fosters cognitive, social, emotional, and physical development. Our experienced educators utilize a blend of play-based learning and structured activities to ensure that each child reaches their full potential. Additionally, our daycare services provide working parents with peace of mind, knowing that their child is in a secure and supportive environment while they're away. Whether it's through creative arts, interactive games, or outdoor exploration, we strive to make every moment at Kids Kingdom a valuable learning experience for your little one. Join us at Kids Kingdom and let's embark on a journey of discovery and growth together!
submitted by Grand_Valuable_2620 to u/Grand_Valuable_2620 [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 07:44 Remote_Stomach_4703 What are your thoughts on "Once a cheater, always a cheater" ? I need advice and different perspectives for my story.

I've dated my boyfriend for 3 years. We lived together, we went through so much together. it wasn't just a relationship, he was like family to me. I broke up with him during our second year due to me finding him flirting with a girl at a bar. Then he ended up begging me to take him back; he said how I'm the woman of his life and how we have such bond and connection. I'll admit, yes, he was the love of my life and vice versa. I don't feel like I'll love anyone else in my life as much as I loved him, because our love was so pure; my love for him was, and still is unconditional. It's hard to put into words but it just feels like our inner childs connect and we share so much with each other. We know everything about each other and that always brought me a sense of comfort. I ended up taking him back because I didn't want to make such big deal out of just flirting for female validation.
However, it always felt like he wanted the best of both worlds. He wanted to have me committed to him, staying at home, have no male friends, while he could just get out to bars and even not text me sometimes for the whole night. I gave a lot of what he did to his age at the time, he was 21-22.
After putting the puzzle together though, I realized that he was and is super insecure. He wanted constant validation from family, friends, me, and apparently other females to keep going and pushing. He never really liked his body while liking his overall stylish look. But never with his body underneath. The interesting part is, he didn't really workout and he would put junk food into his body and then internally cry about the results not being there, since he is not his 17 year old self who burned so many calories naturally without having to do anything. I would encourage him to come to the gym with me and he did at times, but he was always grumpy when a topic about working out was being talked about.
He also had an avoidant attachment style. He would run away if there was a need of emotional vulnerability. I believe that's how he coped with things when his parents got a divorce; he was only 6.
Anyways, after taking him back, I went to my home country and he came to visit in between my visit to get a good taste of where I grew up in. (it was his first time visiting overseas.) We had a blast time. I stayed longer so he came back and was by himself, mainly with his friends. I didn't question him much when i was there because I wanted to give him space while I took mine, we were in touch though, just not as regularly.
I got back, he picked me up from the airport and had something going on with him. He did not seem happy to see me. Long story short, he broke up with me for bullshit reasons and I couldn't just let him go because it was very unexpected and unbelievable. I saw him multiple times and in all of those conversations, he was so cold. Cold to a point where I questioned who I was dating. And on my last conversation, he admitted that he cheated on me when I was back home.
I didn't say much, I was disgusted. I let him go. 7 months after no-contact, he texted me to give me my stuff back. I sent someone to take them and they came back with a letter from him...
You can probably imagine what the letter says. It was three pages long, majority of what he addressed was a loving goodbye while confessing his love over and over again. He addressed how much he regrets this betrayal and how he is aware of him being a broken person who needs therapy.
3 weeks after receiving his letter, I decided to see him in person to give this an end fully. I didn't want any more love letters or anything, I was logically done and I had to see him because I gradually got worse as the days went by. As soon as I saw him, I melted. I noticed how much I was sick of trying to move on and date other people. I missed our connection, love, affection, and our lovey-dovey times. I missed him so much to a point where I forgot where I was or what time it was, I never wanted to leave or give it an end right there. He also have lost the 20 pounds he was upset over for years.
Now, I have been talking to him for 3 weeks or so. He's been showing the commitment and consistency towards his own workout routine and healthy eating. He said things like, " I told you so many times before that I felt like I didn't deserve you, but now I feel like I do." "I will show you through my actions, just wait and see. Give me a chance to just be in your life." "I love my body now and I only need your validation to feel handsome, you are the one."
He cried so many times for hours and I have never seen him as emotionally vulnerable and open. He really seems like he wants to work on himself and his overall health. (In all aspects.) He really has been showing so far how much he wants to change his life for the better and for himself, not just for me. it doesn't feel like it's only for me because I saw him not committing to his routine one time and it kills him mentally, he needs to be on track with the promises he makes to himself, it seems.
He recently moved to another state, for the sake of growth and him wanting to get out of his hometown. I don't know what that will bring, but I'm trying to do my own thing. He talks to me like how we used to talk and I don't know how to find the balance because he was the most important person in my life for a long time.
I have hope for him, I want him to be happy regardless. But I'm so confused. I feel betrayed every time i'm not with him. When I'm with him, he is my person. But when I come home or we're apart for couple days, I think of everything and just get disgusted.
I feel emotionally weak right now so if and/or when I make a logical decision of letting him go for the better, it stabs me mentally and I feel like I'm dying, so I know I'll be crawling back to him and that'd be even more embarrassing. Also, letting go of him seems hard because I am almost so sure that I won't be able to fall in love with someone as much as I fell in love with him. I'm not saying that I won't at all, but I just know internally that I won't love someone else as deeply and unconditionally. We have so many memories together and I feel like he is my family. Our physical attraction is so on point. I know he didn't do this because of me or the relationship because I think it was beautiful and every problem could be solved if we just talked.
Other option is to stay with him to let him prove everything to me and see if I want to be in a relationship with him again, but in that case, will I respect myself? Will I actually forgive him for what he did and everything he put me through? Can I ever build that trust with him again? Will he actually develop himself and grow for himself? Am I willing to take the risk of him cheating on me again? Will I be happy with him, knowing what he did to me? (I feel like if he did it again, it'd be easier to move on, but what do I know.)
This is also a topic of morals, ethics, and values aligning or not in a relationship. I would just never cheat on someone simply because that's not within my character and I never even thought of it as an option due to my ethics, morals, and values. But obviously, that's not the case for him.
Would I rather take the risk of moving on with my life, letting this love go and potentially compare every new person or relationship to my connection with him, or would I rather go down on a path where I might never feel that safety and loyalty from him and also live with the thought of accepting such behavior that my morals are so against towards.
There is also another flip side to the coin where, everyone has the capability of cheating and I know there are 7.9999 billion people who didn't do that to me yet, but can this be forgiven for the sake of this unknown phenomenon that applies to everyone else also?
This a battle of my logic and my heart. One thing I wrote is "Is it worth to let go of love, for the sake of self-respect?"
Is once a cheater always a cheater?
submitted by Remote_Stomach_4703 to u/Remote_Stomach_4703 [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 07:43 PicaroKaguya My struggle with the Greek Consulate in Canada

Apologies ahead of time, as this post will be easier for me to type out in English than In Greek. Also TLDR at the bottom.
So essentially in 2019, I decided to get my Greek citizenship as everyone in my family has it except for me who was born in Canada and my parents finally gave up on trying to return to Greece.
After a long and exhausting process of papers, translation of official Canadian documents, money spent to correct Canadian documents due to discrepancies, and then finally after 1000 euros spent I was able to finally register my birth and become a Greek citizen.
Now comes the headache.
For the last 4 years I have been in a constant struggle to get my passport. The consular general at the time was VERY helpful, but then she returned to Greece and someone else took over, to when they started demanding a VERY different amount of papers.
They started asking for my CPP (Government Pension Plan) payments, 15 years of tax forms, university forms, letters from my employers, bank statements to see how much money I had, phone bills pretty much anything to prove that I have been living in Canada my whole life (even though I was 32 when I had applied for greek citizenship) While I have provided everything they requested they have given me 3 different answers to what I need to finally get my passport.
First they claimed I need some magical letter from the military. After waiting a year since becoming a greek citizen, they informed me that "the letter will be sent" for conscription. Hastily, I called the stratiologo in my state (peleponneso) and they have told me that I am not even in the system.
When I informed the consulate they told me to keep waiting. So I waited another year and began to get a bit impatient. I found out that all I need to get a passport was proof that I was a resident in an overseas country for over 15 years. When I told the consulate the exact specific document , they began to tell me I need something a μητρώο αρρένων.
Keep in mind that everytime I send them an email (which is the only form of communication they will accept) they will take upto a month to reply to me and usually with 1 sentence responses.
So when I finally asked how do I get the μητρώο αρρένων, they informed me that I need to figure it out with the greek social services office in Kyllini. After scouring the web and finding 10 different numbers I was finally able to get a hold of an office who told me I called the wrong service but finally gave me the right number for getting the μητρώο αρρένων.
So I call the number and the lady who was very helpful kept calling the consulate fucking stupid, and was saying they haven't given a μητρώο αρρένων since 2014 and that's not how it works anymore. She even told me to tell the consulate to call her directly if they have any issues.
After I transcribed our conversation, I wrote back to the consulate which just replied back "Please call the military and figure it out yourself). Everytime I also asked for AMKA number they have ignored me, so to this day I have no proof that I am greek.
At this point I don't know what to do. Even according to the stratiologo website they are not allowed to withhold my passport and give it to me. I have called the embassy in ottawa and they told me that I need to directly communicate with the consulate in Vancouver.
If anyone has any advice for me please let me know.
TLDR; I Became a greek citizen in 2021, but I have no proof I am a greek and the consulate refuses to give me a passport because it's asking for a number they dont give out anymore, knor does the greek military know i exist.
submitted by PicaroKaguya to greece [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 07:40 SeekingtheTruth1115 Is it Common For Family and Friends to Abandon someone if they survive late stage diagnosis?

I was diagnosed stage 3 NSC Lung cancer almost four years ago (36 yo male). Family situation was/is My dad lives here in Ohio and so does my brother (34) . My sister (38) lives in Chicago. My mom lives in Florida it comes up here for the summers. I was always close with my family and coworkers before I was diagnosed. I had that overwhelming wave of support you get when everyone you know finds out your cancer. It was all phone calls, texts, and emails for the most part. My diagnosis wasn’t the best as the cancer had spread to my adrenal gland and lymph nodes. My dad really stepped up and he was my rock. I’m lucky I had him during that time. He drove me to chemo the first couple of treatments and sat in on the dr appointments as a second ear. I was going to be doing 5 rounds of chemo every three weeks and immunotherapy for 12. The chemo killed the tumor so they cut out the upper lobe of my right lung. Immunotherapy wasn’t great but I got through it.
I was incredibly happy that I survived it all and got back to work. However some things really bothered me such as my mom never came back home during my chemo. She came home for my lobectomy in November 2020 and visited me in the hospital and held my hand like I was her baby boy again when they removed all the breathing , catheters, and drainage tubes. When I got home I noticed phone calls and texts weren’t coming in. It also bothered me that my sister never came to see me and she’s about four hours away but not four days. My brother was in town and only came once during the year of treatment.
Another thing that bothered me is none of my coworkers would call or text during my time off. I really worried when I got a letter from my employer of ten years that I was terminated. It was a really tough time and I was on so much medication and my whole routine was sitting on the couch and watching YouTube. I slowly descended into a very dark place and became scared of going in public places because I thought people were staring at me because I looked so sickly and dying. My bank account was getting down to nothing and I asked for my old position back and luckily they hired me again. It was excruciatingly difficult physically and emotionally to sell cars that hot summer of 2021. I had heat stroke three months of being back and thought I was done. I was really sick and weak. I was miserable with so many things. When I did see my family I’m sure that attitude wore off and I soon was getting comments that I was too negative.
My kids mom hates me and was in cancer research and sent me this factoid sheet from the American Cancer Association that said my five year survival odds were 3%. She said I was wasting my time I had left. She fueled my fire to live just to prove her wrong but at this point my kid wanted me to die because he thought he’d get lots of life insurance money. Then I had to take custody unexpectedly of that same kid who wanted nothing to do with me. I was barely selling enough cars to keep my job and now had to take care of and raise a 13 year old with angst. That’s when my family truly disappeared and I think it’s because they’re worried my cancer would cone back then they’d have to care for my kid.
Fast forward to now and my son is reunited with his mom. His and my relationship has never been better after getting to spend 16 months living together. My health is I’m still alive obviously but my lungs are getting much weaker and my volume is shrinking and i also originally diagnosed late stage copd and have to take steroids to help me breathe. So my health is back on the downslope and my family is completely gone. My dad never calls or talks to me, and neither do my brother or sister. I see my mom once every couple of months when she’s home from Florida . We’ll go to Cracker Barrel and she’ll give me this half disgusted look and I get about 45 minutes of her time
I’m just sad that they’re gone but realized they’re kind of not the best family so I might be better. I truly believe they were looking at my custody and health situation as a hot potato so they all ran for the hills. Now with my breathing is getting more and more along with seizures it’s difficult and it’s real I’m going to die young and possibly soon. it’s really effecting my memory and stamina. I get confused and need naps. Its sometimes an insurmountable task for me to go greet a customer on the lot and begin the five hour process of selling a car and getting dirty looks from customers because I look like shit because well Ive been through some stuff. My sales are failing and they want me gone. I need health insurance and what little money I do make to support my son. Im worried all this financial, parental, and physical stress is going to bring back my cancer just because im stressed and just feel hopeless. I think of how I’ll die from COPD and how horrifying it seems to die that way. With my family gone and my coworkers wanting me gone I know it will be alone or at a state hospital with some hospice nurse I have no clue is. I don’t look for your pity but I’d like any advice you might have to how I can find solace in this lonely isolated place I’m trapped in. I’m angry at my family but I love them.I feel like I was supposed to die and even though I didn’t die then physically I died to them mentally. Maybe it’s too tough to watch someone you love struggle and know you’ll have to do it again
The only thing besides spending time with my son that really makes me happy is painting. During all of this I somehow found out I love to paint and since a June 2022 I’ve painted a couple of hundred paintings. Painting gives me hope.
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2024.05.15 07:34 vonuvonu Lawyer recommendations for dealing with a difficult neighbour

My parents have a difficult neighbour who keeps sending letters threatening to sue, mostly about the fence line but he has many odd grievances. They’ve called around various firms but aren’t having luck finding a lawyer who specializes in this area/willing to take this on and give advice. I said ignore til he actually files but they want to get ahead as he’s already suing(?)/filed against the neighbour on the other side so they think he’s serious.
submitted by vonuvonu to VictoriaBC [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 07:11 salt_softluvr COR

hello po! i would like to ask po, anong need na requirements if parent/guardian ang magcla-claim ng COLupon ko po?
i received an email that my COR is already available pero i have work from monday-saturday po, is prc id + photocopy of prc id + document stamp + authorization letter enough?
also need pa po ba mag-appointment sa leris to claim COR? or pwede pong walk-in?
tysm !
submitted by salt_softluvr to MedTechPH [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 07:11 Standard_Material335 Should I proceed with my interview with the EEOC? I have already submitted a complaint and the next step is an interview, which I plan to do in-person because there are no virtual interviews available in the next 4 months

I think I may have a case of disability discrimination and retaliation because my employer fired me shortly after I showed my supervisor a note stating that I re-aggravated my herniated back injury and the doctor "feels that I should limit my walking and bending for the next two weeks". The problem was I was still on probation and apparently was only on month 5 of 12. I was employed by a large government agency of more than 500 employees.
I have sent details of my case to numerous employment attorneys in my area and have gotten some responses, with one offering to represent me and sending me a retainer where they would earn 40% of the award amount, no retainer fee, and a section stating that if the agreement is terminated before a decision is made by either party for reasons listed such as not disclosing material facts, not agreeing to a settlement, I fail to pay fees and expenses, I make it unethical and difficult to continue representation, or other "Just Cause". I am also able to terminate it at any time for any reason, and if the agreement is terminated before a decision is reached, then I would be responsible for the work that the firm has put in and pay them for their hourly rates as well as all the fees associated.
I have done some research online and found out that sometimes these cases will take a long time, sometimes as long as 14 months, after viewing other lawyers' and firms' case results on their websites. I am afraid that they will drag this out and then I would be responsible for all the fees and hours they have put in and having a false sense of hope that my case can be successful. Are these types of cases usually decided in one court hearing? If so, maybe I can try it out and see if they can win for me after one court hearing, and if they don't they I can terminate the agreement and just pay them for trying one time.
Or am I looking at this the wrong way and the fact that I was offered such a great deal from a firm (no retainer fee, they will only get paid a percentage if they win or the agreement is terminated early) mean that my case is really strong?
I also asked them if I should go and do my interview with the EEOC because I have submitted a complaint and they explicitly told me not to do this. Is this because they don't want it to go to the EEOC where I can have a chance of mediation with my employer thereby resolving this case before they can take it on and potentially drag it out like I described above?
How many of you were able to resolve a simple case discrimination case like this without the help of a lawyer? When is a lawyer really even needed? Should I not follow their advice and go to my interview with the EEOC anyways? I also live in New York and have already submitted a complaint with the NYSDHR where I have received a letter back in the mail stating that I a case number and filed a charge already. They asked to send me a picture of the front page which has the case number to them, which I did.
submitted by Standard_Material335 to disability [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 07:10 Standard_Material335 Should I proceed with my interview with the EEOC? I have already submitted a complaint and the next step is an interview, which I plan to do in-person because there are no virtual interviews available in the next 4 months

I think I may have a case of disability discrimination and retaliation because my employer fired me shortly after I showed my supervisor a note stating that I re-aggravated my herniated back injury and the doctor "feels that I should limit my walking and bending for the next two weeks". The problem was I was still on probation and apparently was only on month 5 of 12. I was employed by a large government agency of more than 500 employees.
I have sent details of my case to numerous employment attorneys in my area and have gotten some responses, with one offering to represent me and sending me a retainer where they would earn 40% of the award amount, no retainer fee, and a section stating that if the agreement is terminated before a decision is made by either party for reasons listed such as not disclosing material facts, not agreeing to a settlement, I fail to pay fees and expenses, I make it unethical and difficult to continue representation, or other "Just Cause". I am also able to terminate it at any time for any reason, and if the agreement is terminated before a decision is reached, then I would be responsible for the work that the firm has put in and pay them for their hourly rates as well as all the fees associated.
I have done some research online and found out that sometimes these cases will take a long time, sometimes as long as 14 months, after viewing other lawyers' and firms' case results on their websites. I am afraid that they will drag this out and then I would be responsible for all the fees and hours they have put in and having a false sense of hope that my case can be successful. Are these types of cases usually decided in one court hearing? If so, maybe I can try it out and see if they can win for me after one court hearing, and if they don't they I can terminate the agreement and just pay them for trying one time.
Or am I looking at this the wrong way and the fact that I was offered such a great deal from a firm (no retainer fee, they will only get paid a percentage if they win or the agreement is terminated early) mean that my case is really strong? By the way, I have not sent them my entire case details but they have still offered to represent me and sent me a retainer, which I find rather odd. Should I interpret this as a positive thing, they believe I have a strong case just from my very brief description, or negative, they are offering to represent me and sent me a retainer before knowing all the details in hopes that I will accept it because I am a noob and may drag it out or terminate last minute therefore making me have to pay all the work they have put in.
I also asked them if I should go and do my interview with the EEOC because I have submitted a complaint and they explicitly told me not to do this. Is this because they don't want it to go to the EEOC where I can have a chance of mediation with my employer thereby resolving this case before they can take it on and potentially drag it out like I described above?
How many of you were able to resolve a simple case discrimination case like this without the help of a lawyer? When is a lawyer really even needed? Should I not follow their advice and go to my interview with the EEOC anyways? I also live in New York and have already submitted a complaint with the NYSDHR where I have received a letter back in the mail stating that I a case number and filed a charge already. They asked to send me a picture of the front page which has the case number to them, which I did.
submitted by Standard_Material335 to Ask_Lawyers [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 07:06 MelodicSignature6354 Feeling Stuck

I'm at a point in my life where I feel completely stuck and hopeless. I'm hoping that sharing my story here might give me some clarity or at least help me feel a little less alone.
I've been through two divorces, and both were marriages my parents arranged with my cousins at the age of 19 and then at 27. From the beginning, I wasn't happy in either marriage. It felt like I had no choice, and I went along with it to please my parents. But I ended up feeling miserable and trapped. Eventually, both marriages ended in divorce, which brought its own set of challenges and emotional turmoil. Did I do this to myself and let someone stomp on me smh.
Now, on top of dealing with the emotional fallout of two failed marriages, I'm struggling with my career in TECH. I don't even have one. I've been applying for jobs left and right, but in this job market, it feels nearly impossible to get my foot in the door. Every rejection letter chips away at my confidence a little more. ( I DID GRADUATE AND HAVE A BACHELORS IN PSYCH BUT NEVER REALLU USED IT)
I've been praying and doing dikher trying to find some hope or guidance, but I still feel lost. I see people around me moving forward with their lives—building careers, finding happiness, creating families and I can't help but feel like I'm falling further behind every day.
Has anyone else been through something similar? How did you get out of that dark place and find a way to move forward? Any advice or words of encouragement would be deeply appreciated.
Thanks for listening.
submitted by MelodicSignature6354 to islam [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 07:06 D1MPL3S What are the chances?/how to help a psychotic partner?

Without going into too much detail, my partner has been in a psychotic episode for about 3 months now, mostly dealing with a number if delusions and paranoia. They had been to a psych ward and briefly seemed to be doing better after being med compliant, but quickly took a turn for the worse after being released.
Thankfully the parents were able to help out and were able to take them out of state to take care of them. They are now seeing a new psychiatrist, but are refusing tests and medication. I tried everything I could to make them see that something is not right, but they won't believe that something is not ok. We've heard stress induced psychosis, and weed induced psychosis ... but having had a number of ketamine treatments could also have had an affect?
I'm really overwhelmed at this point, and am at a loss. I don't know how to try and help them anymore especially since they are now halfway across the country (US) ... so the question is how likely is it that they may just "snap out of it" one day without getting on medication?
Alternatively, any advice for a loving partner on what I can try and do to help them? I love them too much to give up, but it feels like I've exhausted all my options ... my therapist says just keep showing up for them, but it is hard when they don't/can't communicate (they don't trust their phone or laptop and my letters have so far been unanswered) ... I am going to see them over memorial day weekend and then a month after that and want to do the best I can to help them ... mostly planning on trying to do things they enjoy with them.
submitted by D1MPL3S to Psychosis [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 07:04 Impressive_Stick9335 Should I proceed with my interview with the EEOC? I have already submitted a complaint and the next step is an interview, which I plan to do in-person because there are no virtual interviews available in the next 4 months

I think I may have a case of disability discrimination and retaliation because my employer fired me shortly after I showed my supervisor a note stating that I re-aggravated my herniated back injury and the doctor "feels that I should limit my walking and bending for the next two weeks". The problem was I was still on probation and apparently was only on month 5 of 12. I was employed by a large government agency of more than 500 employees.
I have sent details of my case to numerous employment attorneys in my area and have gotten some responses, with one offering to represent me and sending me a retainer where they would earn 40% of the award amount, no retainer fee, and a section stating that if the agreement is terminated before a decision is made by either party for reasons listed such as not disclosing material facts, not agreeing to a settlement, I fail to pay fees and expenses, I make it unethical and difficult to continue representation, or other "Just Cause". I am also able to terminate it at any time for any reason, and if the agreement is terminated before a decision is reached, then I would be responsible for the work that the firm has put in and pay them for their hourly rates as well as all the fees associated.
I have done some research online and found out that sometimes these cases will take a long time, sometimes as long as 14 months, after viewing other lawyers' and firms' case results on their websites. I am afraid that they will drag this out and then I would be responsible for all the fees and hours they have put in and having a false sense of hope that my case can be successful. Are these types of cases usually decided in one court hearing? If so, maybe I can try it out and see if they can win for me after one court hearing, and if they don't they I can terminate the agreement and just pay them for trying one time.
Or am I looking at this the wrong way and the fact that I was offered such a great deal from a firm (no retainer fee, they will only get paid a percentage if they win or the agreement is terminated early) mean that my case is really strong? By the way, I have not sent them my entire case details but they have still offered to represent me and sent me a retainer, which I find rather odd. Should I interpret this as a positive thing, they believe I have a strong case just from my very brief description, or negative, they are offering to represent me and sent me a retainer before knowing all the details in hopes that I will accept it because I am a noob and may drag it out or terminate last minute therefore making me have to pay all the work they have put in.
I also asked them if I should go and do my interview with the EEOC because I have submitted a complaint and they explicitly told me not to do this. Is this because they don't want it to go to the EEOC where I can have a chance of mediation with my employer thereby resolving this case before they can take it on and potentially drag it out like I described above?
How many of you were able to resolve a simple case discrimination case like this without the help of a lawyer? When is a lawyer really even needed? Should I not follow their advice and go to my interview with the EEOC anyways? I also live in New York and have already submitted a complaint with the NYSDHR where I have received a letter back in the mail stating that I a case number and filed a charge already. They asked to send me a picture of the front page which has the case number to them, which I did.
submitted by Impressive_Stick9335 to EEOC [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 06:39 KikiKiwi20 How can I help my parents kick out my adult sister and her boyfriend from their home in Quebec?

Here's the situation: my sister "Kate" (34) and her boyfriend "Ken" (42) (not their real names) moved into my parents' house after getting evicted from their apartment. They live in Quebec. My parents offered them a guest room in their home that they own until they found their own place. But it's been nearly a year now! My parents are fed up because they are being disrespected in their own home that they’ve worked so hard to have (both immigrants from poor families who worked tirelessly to give their children as much as they can). My parents have told them multiple times that it's time to leave, but Kate and Ken won't budge. They don't contribute financially and their names aren't on any lease, although their mail is being sent to my parents' address.
Things have gotten so bad that Kate and Ken record every argument on their phones. You'd think they would want to leave, but no. Their behavior is disgusting to me, leeching off two retired people. It’s time for my parents to relax and finally enjoy life, but instead, they are suffering, getting stressed and being bullied in their own home. I’m already seething with anger as I write this…
My parents want to kick them out but don't know how. They have an appointment with the Regie in a few weeks and need to write a letter explaining why they want Kate and Ken out. I'm confused because they aren't tenants. I myself don’t know how the process works as I haven’t lived in Quebec for over 10 years; I moved to Europe. Do my parents need to go through a legal process to evict them? If so, what steps do they need to take? I’m taking this on as someone needs to look after them! Any advice/info would be greatly appreciated!
submitted by KikiKiwi20 to RealEstateCanada [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 06:39 Far-Earth919 AITAH for not talking/meeting my biological mother.

Hello OKOP empire. Thank you for taking time to read this. it will be long but on to my story.
So I'm going to give background of the beginning of my life. It was my determining factor of why I didn't want anything to do with her. Names I use are not their real names.
When I was conceived my Bio mom (we'll call her Sally (17F) ) already had a little girl my bio half sis (call her Chrissy (1F) ) Chrissy would go to our babysitters house ( call her Jenny (34F) ) while Sally went to school. When bio Grandma (Call her Karen, don't know how old she was at that time) found out Sally was Pregnant with me, She was furious, According to my Bio Aunt (Deny (14F) ) Karen almost killed us. Deny said she had to step in and stop Karen from hitting Sally even more after she threw her down the stairs. After her rage subsided she took Sally and Chrissy to an apartment and said you want to be sleuthing around your old enough to live on your own. Sally kept trying to go to school as she dropped off Chrissy at Jenny's, then would go to a job and try to make things work.
Time goes on and I am born, I then started going to Jenny's as well sometimes spending the night with Chrissy as well at times.
Now Jenny was Babysitting in the day, EMT at night and did foster care with her husband Lee (38M). his job was teaching Spanish. Super hero's in my eyes FR.
After that month Jenny said she had not seen me and Chrissy for about 2 weeks. She got a call from social services asking her to go to Sally's apartment to check on her and the children. Jenny wasted no time at all grabbed her bag as her son (Josh (10M) ) asked to go with she said sure.
Jenny went up too the apartment door and knocked, with no answer but as they stood outside she could hear kids crying inside but still no one came to answer the door. She went and got the manager of the apartment complex and asked him to open Sally's door. But she had to call the cops and paramedics to come out before he could open the door. they had to stay outside for about 20 Mins for the emergency services to show. They finally get the door open and see Sally on the couch unresponsive. Jenny went to the bedroom door as one of the police officers had to break it down due to it being locked. I was only around 2 months old and Chrissy at this point was almost two years old and didn't know how to open doors at that time. So Josh went in with Jenny, seeing Chrissy trying to feed me a bottle that was filled with curdled milk. Josh looked at Jenny and said mom she looks dead referencing me. They rushed us to the hospital and found that Sally was alcohol poisoned and I was very dehydrated, underweight, eyes sunken into my sockets. Doctor told Jenny if i were not able to gain weight in 3 days i would be in ICU for failure to thrive ( basically all organs start to shut down and would basically be dying). Chrissy and I were put into Jenny's foster home that night. Jenny took us home and feed me close to 8-8oz bottles. she said it was the most amazing thing as i ate my skin turned back to a pinkish color my eyes came out and my body started filling out, never throwing up a drop.
Time goes on and we were put into the fosteadopt program. Karen wanted Chrissy but did not want me. She ended up taking Chrissy without finalizing papers with the court, taking off to another state.
I was a little over 2 yrs old when Jenny and Lee official adopted me. Now she was my mom and he my dad giving me 5 brothers and 1 sister. Big family I know
I was 6 yrs old when we had ready a weekly reader on adoption in school. A lot of what they were saying in it with how adoptees feel is exactly how I felt, also as my family would be talking about who got what from which parent. I asked who's eyes did I have and my mom would answer you have your mothers eyes. I got very confused about that then we read that weekly reader. So many questions had swirled in my mind. One day as my mom and I are walking into a Wal-Mart crossing the front where the cross walk is as I'm holding her hand, I asked her mom am I adopted? She looked at me with a pause and said well yeah you are in a more concerned voice then any other emotion. I didn't ask anymore questions for a few days, but one night I walked into my parents room and asked why did my family give me up and all my mom said was god meant for us to have you. I then asked if i had any sisters or brothers and she told me about Chrissy. Being so little I couldn't really deal with the thought of someone just threw me away and felt like I did something wrong and that's why my bio family didn't want me.
As I get older with a year or two in between i would keep going to my mom asking more questions. Now you remember my parents also did foster care as well and I would hear and comprehend at around 12 of the children coming to my home for things and they would tell me of there horrifying story of how they ended up in the system. A lot of them were horrible stories and I couldn't understand how a parent do something as bad as they did to their own children.
When I was Fourteen I went to my mom where my brother Josh was talking with her about something and said ok mom I am old enough to know what exactly what happened to me cause I deserve to know my story. I saw my brother and her share this look of like hey its time she should know kinda face. She then proceeded to tell me the whole story minus what i wrote about Karen and Sally bit cause she did not know about that. Deny is the one that filled me in about that. Deny was the one to call in with concerns about us that day my life was saved, to social services.
I spent many days with free time in computer class looking so hard for my half sister after that but since it was still so new at that point I could not find much out about anyone.
More time goes on and I was around 26 yrs old and I do a little google search looking for Sally sue to her being the only way i could possibly find my half sister. I had found a birth certificate that I had a very strong feeling that it was Sally's, A couple months go bye with no other hits and one day i see i have two message requests on FB one from Deny which she began by giving info about me where we lived and just personal info that no one else would of known except for the ones involved. i had another from Chrissy who was saying basically the same thing. I went numb. from the top of my head to the tip of my toes i felt like electricity was vibrating my body. I asked my husband what he thought he said its up to you love what ever you want to do i'm hear for you. so i begin to type and we had gotten to know each other. i went to their state and met them also met Karen. didn't really care for that but was told Sally was telling Chrissy and Deny to find me that was top priority to her for some odd reason. but anyway they asked if i would want to meet her, i answered im not sure im up for that yet.
I get back home after a 2 week visit and I was being asked many times to meet or at least talk with Sally. I finally said no i'd rather not cause i already have a wonderful loving mother and i rather not go down that road with Sally cause i couldn't get over her just leaving. Jenny gave permission for Sally to visit or send me letters as i grew as much as she wanted but she never sent anything or called. my adoption was an open/closed adoption. meaning Sally could contact me anytime and visit me where it was closed for the Bio father who was never in the picture. But Chrissy/Deny and I had a huge fight about it and are no longer in contact. its better cause it was a very toxic family and id rather leave the toxins out of my life.
So guys was I the AH for not wanting to meet/talk to Sally???
​
submitted by Far-Earth919 to okopshow [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 06:38 GMMitenka Seattle, Washington, United States - Requesting Custodial Parent Approval for Visitation of Terminally Ill GRANDFATHER

The mother of my child currently has sole custody and I'm only allowed supervised visits every other weekend due to not being able to afford a mental health evaluation that allowed for collateral from the mother. I finally started the assessment on May 1st, but the organization forgot about it and didn't take the next steps. I called today and so they now know and will hopefully expedite it so that I can get my partial custody back.
But my father, my daughter's grandfather is likely going to pass away this weekend, or possibly before that. I've been tasked with writing a request, and been told that the request must be very specific, to allow Violette to visit her grandfather this weekend. This is what I have so far and I would love some help and advice.
"I am requesting emergency visitation (or whatever the correct term is) for CHILD NAME to see her GRANDFATHER who is in the Critical Care Unit at NAME General Hospital during the hospital's visiting hours which are 8am-8pm.
CHILD NAME’s grandfather, GRANDFATHER NAME, has been battling cancer for many years. A few weeks ago we were told he had about 6 months to live. However, things took a rapid turn for the worse and he is now in critical condition. My family and I are concerned that he will pass away before my next scheduled supervised visit with CHILD NAME on 5/25. At the very latest a visit should be scheduled by this Sunday, May 19th.
I think it is important that CHILD NAME be able to say goodbye to her GRANDFATHER and so I am proposing the following proposals for the custodial parent to choose from below.
Option 1: CUSTODIAL PARENT chooses a date for the visit from Wednesday, May 15th through Sunday, May 19th. 8:00am on that day at the HOSPITAL NAME when visiting hours begins the CUSTODIAL PARENT exchanges CHILD NAME with the GRANDMOTHER NAME, who will become the visitation supervisor, and at 8:00pm when visitation ends the CUSTODIAL PARENT takes back CHILD NAME. The CUSTODIAL PARENT can propose a shorter visit, but because the terminally ill GRANDFATHER is in and out of consciousness it seems best to try and have the visit be as long as possible. When the visit ends the GRANDMOTHER ceases to be the the visitation supervisor and EXCHANGES the CHILD NAME and the visit is over.
Option 2: The CUSTODIAL PARENT chooses either Satuday, May 18th or Sunday May 19th, and on that day at 8:00am the FATHER'S GIRLFRIEND picks up CHILD NAME from the CUSTODIAL PARENT's home and becomes the visitation supervisor. At a distance no less than 1000 feet the visitation supervisor picks up FATHER NAME and they drive to HOSPITAL NAME and visit with GRANDFATHER NAME. After visiting hours have ended the visitation supervisor transports the CHILD NAME back to the CUSTODIAL PARENT, after the FATHER exits the vehicle no less than 1,000 feet away, and the visitation is over.
Option 3: CUSTODIAL PARENT chooses a date for the visit from Wednesday, May 15th through Sunday, May 19th. 8:00am on that day at the HOSPITAL NAME when visiting hours begins CUSTODIAL PARENT take CHILD NAME to visit the GRANDFATHER and at 8:00pm when visiting hours are over the visitation is concluded. Only in this case the FATHER is not present for the visit.
If the GRANDFATHER passes away before the scheduled visit can occur, then the visit will be canceled. "
submitted by GMMitenka to FamilyLaw [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 06:35 Significant_Ad_6668 Does this letter means an approval? Is it a normal visa or super visa ?

Hi guys I applied for tourist visa application for my parents the primary reason for their visit is to attend my brothers wedding in August. But when I filled out the application online, the reason that I selected was « to visit us and the grandchildren. » as that was no other reason available that would explain a visit for a wedding. In a letter to IRCC, I did explain to them that they are going to be attending the wedding as primary reason as I wanted their application to be processed asap with a tourist visa for a short stay.
Today I received a letter from IRCC requesting my parents (who are in Mauritius 🇲🇺) to go drop their original passport at the Visa application centre. The letter did not say that it has been approved yet and it read as follows
Quote «
This is in reference to your application for temporary residence. A decision has been made on your application. We require your passport to finalize processing your application.
Note: For super visa applications, passports must be submitted to a visa application centre outside Canada for insertion of a visitor visa.
unquote
My question is -
Can this be considered as an approval ? I wanted to buy the tickets asap while they are still favorable .
I wanted to apply for a tourist visa for faster process. But is there any chance that the application was considered and approved for a super visa due to the fact that I selected the reason for visit was to visit us and the grandchildren ?
Thanks
submitted by Significant_Ad_6668 to ImmigrationCanada [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 06:33 sappy60 How do I avoid triggering a meltdown for my SIL (34F) when she finds out that I'm (22F) expecting?

I’m just looking for some advice, and I hope you don’t hate me too much for posting here. My much older sister in law (34, future SIL actually) couldn’t have kids, has failed IVF, and no longer trying from what I’ve been told. However her mental health is not good, but she refuses to get properly diagnosed or even speak to a therapist for that matter. I don’t have a close relationship with SIL because she always treated me coldly as a child for no reason. I’m also not close to my big brother. It’s so tiring to be walking on eggshells around her, and I was told that “she had a terrible meltdown” in front of my parents when a distant cousin of mine announced she was expecting. Her infertility is her entire personality.
Situation is: I’m currently 21 weeks pregnant. I’m only 22 and just graduated university this summer with a good job lined up. It was an accident. I have been with my partner for almost 7 years (since we were 15), and we got engaged before I found out. Please don’t send me hate messages, I don’t think I deserve to be degraded and I’ve been told that I should just “get rid of it cause you’re so young”. We can’t be more overjoyed to welcome our little girl. And our relationship has only grown stronger with this pregnancy. I have never even considered terminating, baby is perfectly healthy (I never had morning sickness or other serious pains). I’m getting bigger and it’s not possible to hide with clothing.
I’ve been staying away from SIL as much as I can, but obviously she will figure out sooner or later. She stalks my social media. I don’t have the guts to tell her. Unfortunately, my brother has chosen her over me and my parents, basically cutting off contact. I’m scared to death about potentially pushing her over the edge. I’m just hoping that some perspective from this community might help us.
submitted by sappy60 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 06:33 MiniLover08 16F, looking to meet new people :)

Hii! My name is Sophia and I’m a 16 year old girl looking to exchange stylish letters/small packages with a penpal :D I also don’t mind just sending messages to each other here on Reddit, or a different platform you may be comfortable with!
Let’s set one thing straight… I am extremely lonely! I haven’t had a real connection or conversation with anyone for a long time and I’m need of someone to talk to! I don’t mind any conversation, wether it’s deep and personal or if it’s just something about your day. We can talk about anything!! I have a great personality and just looking for a real human connection.
I’ve been homeschooled for a long time, since the past 8 years! So I’m not very social, and I have zero friends, and I mean that literally 😅 Unless you count my journal as one! But just because I don’t have friends, doesn’t mean I don’t know how to make a great conversation 😉 I have so much to talk about, our conversations could go on for a long time with white I have stored in here 🧠
I’m not very focused on school, I just do the assigned work and go to classes and that’s it, nothing extra! It’s just really hard for me to focus on it, I don’t feel happy doing it and doesn’t have anything to do with what my future career is going to be 🎤 Being a singesongwriter is my goal for the future, and yes to most people it probably sounds silly and think it’s not possible, but if it was then would be have any musicians today? I like to think that almost anything is possible!! 🌟💭 I honestly can’t say if I’m good or bad. I’ve been singing almost non stop for the past six years. Of course there are some things I need to improve on though. The thing is.. I’ve never sang in front of anyone before! Not even my own parents. I sing in front of my brother, but he’s really young so he can’t criticize me 😣
I love watching shows and movies! My favorite genres are romance and comedy the most but I like others too. I also watch crime/investigation shows, it’s always interesting and I have so many recommendations! I have been watching many different shows for the past couple of weeks, it’s very entertaining. I’m always open to recommendations as I usually stick to watching the same things in rotation…which can get boring 😓 My favorite show (anime), is One Piece!! If you don’t like One Piece, then I’m not sure I can talk to you… just kidding 😂 It’s something my entire family likes watching together, we’re currently starting the Whole Cake Island Arc! No spoilers please, I’ve already seen too many 😭
I like drawing, coloring, doodling. I have a journal that I like to decorate with stickers and cute little designs, which is what I plan to do in our letters!! I’m not the best, but I’m not the worst either 😄📝
I go to the golf range regularly to practice! I joined a golf club when I was younger and entered in tournaments too! I say I’m a decent player haha ⛳️
I have an “online business.” I sell here on Reddit and other platforms as well. I sell miniature toys and have been doing so for over a year. I make a decent amount of money from it! 🤑😅
I love cats, flowers/plants/nature 💐, both my parents are amazing cooks so it’s hard to choose a favorite dish 😬, one of my favorite colors is blue, and I can describe what I look like in a private chat if you’re interested in knowing!
I’m very serious about skincare, I had really horrible acne and after all these years I’ve finally been able to clear it up completely 🤩 My skin has never been more radiant :D Still needs work in some places though, I am always open to hearing what you think are the best products, or products that you’ve used that you feel are amazing! Im half Korean, and have always wanted to try Korean/Japanese skincare products. Im not very big on makeup, I don’t wear any. I’m working on showing my natural beauty, and also because I don’t want my skin to break out 😅 I like wearing lipgloss and that’s about it :o
I’ve been through some really dark times and I’ve found the easiest way to let your feelings out is by writing it out in a journal, which is what I’ve been doing recently! My young brain is still growing so it’s hard to process what I see and hear sometimes, and I talk inside my head a lot to try and process it, but the best way to make sense of it all is by writing out what you really feel ❤️‍🩹 But, just know that even if you may be going through something terrible, that it will eventually come to an end, because life is not that cruel and has to balance negative and positive. It’s what I’ve learned and seen, that’s why we have so many emotions because we can’t just be happy all the time, and life can’t just give you happy moments every day, sometimes you need sad/bad days in order to appreciate the good ones! I realized that the past few years I haven’t done anything productive or tried to make myself feel better. But that’s changing! I’ve starting exercising, journaling, upgraded skincare routine, eating healthier and more nutritious hearty foods, and hoping to keep it up! Remember to love yourself and don’t neglect your body, and always take care of yourself 😙 And hopefully once we start chatting, you’ll feel comfortable sharing any dark times you’ve been through!
I’m looking for a penpal from anywhere, male or female!! And hopefully also around my age (16-25), but age doesn’t really matter to me, it’s just a number after all! 💌 We can send letters, chat here on Reddit (or somewhere else if you’d like) or little packages with things each of us like ours letters inside! I’ll be sure to design the letters in an aesthetic you like ✨ I really just want to talk about anything and everything, whatever we want!! Hopefully it can turn into a long lasting friendship 💝
Message me if you’re interested in becoming my penpal! There’s still so much you haven’t learned about me yet <3
submitted by MiniLover08 to penpals [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 06:20 ShadicaMarie I need help looking for my Paternal Family, but have almost NO information

Context. I am a Californian ex-foster kid. Orange county. I was put into the system at the age of 6. After my sister was born. And my dad left not long after that, since he was deported BACK to Mexico(illegal immigrant, no green card). I stayed in the system, till I was 16 and adopted by my now parents.
I learned that my maternal family made it impossible for my paternal, legally here, family to get any contact with me. I grew up thinking all my dad's family went back to Mexico with him, all deported as well. I was a kid, didn't question is can grew up "White", and to proud I was also half Scottish(grandma was mexican and native but we are, white. Not native or especially Mexican). Naturally, this never felt right because I wasn't like my maternal family and cousins who were more white then me. So to learn that was a shock. From my brother who thought it was the best choice. "I'd be too confusing to be both, ya know."
I know my Dad was not a good man. I know what he was doing, I have seen the court records. He was horrid. But so was my birth giverand in my opinionshe was worse for what she did to me and my siblings while just being pregnant(Meth babies, with no prenatal care, the 4 of us). He did at least try an give me attention when asked, and I have some fond memories of him. I don't remember what he ever said to me. He only spoke to me in Spanish
But I feel so ROBBED of a culture I never got to enjoy and truly experience. A whole heritage I can never teach my own babies. Books and movies and stories are....they aren't truly experiencing it. I remember my dad had been working in secret to teach me spanish, a language I was forbidden to speak after, then when asked why i didnt take in in high school ridiculed for. I could have been fluent from a young age. And it hurts. So, I want to find my dad. At least his family. I know, from my asshole brother, that they were threatened into backing down and out. I don't know if it went to court. But I want to find them. See how they are with my own eyes.
And the brother I have who told me about his experience, said all they did was complain and whine. To me, that is logical cause they were denied the basic right to see family. My maternal family STILL let my mom see me, even after Court told them to stop and took me away, proper. I was STILL allowed unsupervised contact with my maternal family, after that. I STILL was allowed to be watched over by drug users and achoholics. But never, did I see my dad's family after the age of 6. Whom I barely remember.
This would help me, so much. Find out about genetic issues, what things like were in Mexico. What it's like to BE MEXICAN.
In point. I don't even know what to start with. I know his name, that he was born in Mexico City, anf that's it. I know his last name is different then his siblings, because of a mistake on his birth certificate, and they added a letter. Thay is from a 1st cousin I met on 23and Me whom stoped contact. And I want to know, what free tools would help find them. Because I genuinely want to k ow them, since they are my family too. And I want my future children to know there grandfather's side too.
submitted by ShadicaMarie to Adoption [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 06:02 Choice_Evidence1983 My Parents Tried to Screw Over My Dying Stepmother, Blew Up All Of Our Lives Instead

I am NOT OOP, OOP is u/WholePomegranate5342
Originally posted to TrueOffMyChest
My Parents Tried to Screw Over My Dying StepMother, Blew Up All Of Our Lives Instead
Trigger Warnings: infidelity, imminent death, terminal illness, financial exploitation, physical assault, emotional abuse and manipulation
Original Post: February 13, 2024
Throwaway for obvious reasons.
My (17F) stepmother "Jane" is a wonderful, wonderful woman. She and my father got married when I was 4, and she's been a rock in my life ever since. My mother was always my primary caregiver, but up until that point her relationship with my father was acrimonious and I basically never saw him. Jane was the reason they developed a stable co-parenting relationship, she encouraged everyone having a good relationship with each other and was always there to support me and my mom when things got rough.
Jane was always a really hard worker. When she met my dad, he was living out of a hotel and my mother was doing everything in her power to keep me away from him because she was petty and angry that their relationship didn't work out. Meanwhile Jane had a great job, a nice house, helped my dad get back on his feet, negotiated a visitation schedule with my mom (who hated her for a long time), and made sure my dad sent us money every week because neither one of them could afford an attorney to negotiate child support payments. Jane had no reason to do any of these things but as I got older she made it clear that she loved me as much as she loved my (half) brothers who were born a few years later. I even have my own room in her house because at the time we lived with my grandparents / various boyfriends of my mom and Jane felt that I needed a more stable environment than that. She's like the opposite of the evil stepmom.
When I was 15, Jane won a big lawsuit against an airline company and got awarded upwards of a million dollars. She used the money to build sizable trust funds for me and my brothers so that we would be taken care of later in life. Despite having a lot more money she still wanted to live a fairly modest life, so she paid off the house she has and has been living there ever since with my dad. Sure she bought a new car and they went on a few nice vacations but she didn't blow all her money on stupid things, which I respected.
About a year ago, things started getting really weird. Whenever I saw Jane she seemed to look sicker and sicker, but no one would tell me or my brothers why even though I know they knew. All we knew is that she was at the hospital a lot. Around the same time, my mom has been coming around my dad a lot more and acting really strange, basically like she was trying to romance him. Whenever Jane was in the hospital my mother would insist on spending the night at their house and playing mom to my brothers, which was so weird to me because she never liked them or Jane. She'd be the perfect little housewife and my mom is NOT like that at all. It was super fake.
Worst of all, my dad started falling for it. I'm not stupid - I'm pretty sure they were sleeping together. I tried to shield my brothers from it but they're not dumb either. I tried talking to my dad too but he insisted it wasn't like that.
Then a few weeks ago, my mom started talking about all the places she'd like to visit, how she wanted a new car and was looking to invest... which is weird because my mom has been a bartender her whole life and has lived paycheck to paycheck since before I was born. She was acting like she was about to get a lot of money, which started to make me really suspicious. Between Jane being sick and my mom acting all nouveau riche, I had a lot of questions.
Finally I decided to visit Jane in the hospital and ask her about my trust fund. I found out that if anything happened to her, that my dad would inherit all the money including full control of the trusts for me and my brothers. She asked me why I was so interested in the trust fund so I told her what's going on with my parents and how my mom has been acting with my dad. I didn't want to but after everything she did for me, she deserved the truth. It really hurt me to break her heart like that, especially once I found out that she was basically in hospice at this point because of irreversible kidney failure. She's only got a few more months. We both cried so much.
Then, two days ago everything came to a head. My mom stormed in furious and started arguing with my dad. Apparently Jane met with her lawyer and changed the trust so that my dad would get nothing and all of the trusts would be controlled by my step-aunt. She demanded to know how Jane found out about their relationship and I came out and told them that I told Jane everything. I told them that if they wanted to play stupid games they would win stupid prizes and that I wasn't going to let them screw Jane over after all the help she gave my family when she didn't have to.
My mom slapped me and my dad just looked so defeated. Then my mom told my dad that she didn't really love him, that she was just pretending to so he would marry her and she could get all of the money. The worst part about it is that my brothers witnessed the whole thing and now on top of their mom dying they have to deal with a cheating dad and his vindictive ex. Our whole family is in ruins and I feel like it's my fault even though I know it's not.
Yesterday I visited Jane again and told her about the fallout. She apologized and said that she had to dissolve my trust fund to make sure my mother didn't get a hold of the money, but that as "her oldest" I will inherit the house/property after she is gone and that's worth more than the other two trust funds combined. My father won't get anything because she's going to divorce him before she dies, and honestly I'm happy for her. She made me promise to take care of my brothers and told me that once I turn 18 this summer I can kick my dad out of the house if I want to. And I FULLY plan to do that btw.
I haven't talked to my dad since and I can't even look at my mom. I can't believe they would conspire to do this to Jane after all this time. Just proof that they deserve each other and I'm embarrassed that they're my parents. Once I turn 18 I'm going to cut my dad out as much as I can and cut my mom out completely. I hope she rots. Meanwhile I'm going to try and be at the hospital as much as I can until Jane passes away.
Anyways. I just needed to vent. I'm really messed up about the whole thing and I feel super betrayed, although I can't even begin to imagine how Jane feels. I'm gonna be so f-ed up when she dies. I can't even think about that right now. But at least she's not surrounded by people who just want to bring her down.
Thanks for reading.
Edit: Some people are asking a lot of the same stuff so I'll just clarify here --
My brothers - My plan is to use some of the estate money fight for guardianship for my twin brothers so that they can live in the house while I kick my dad out. If I can't get guardianship then I will have to let my dad stay in the house. However once I turn 18 I will technically be an adult so even if my dad leaves I'm still legally able to be responsible for them. The only thing I won't be able to do is stop him from taking them if he leaves. But they will be 18 in six years so even if they do have to leave they will always be able to come back whenever they want. In a perfect world my dad would just leave and let my brothers stay with me which I'm sure my bio-mom would be very supportive of because right now she hates all of us and I doubt that will change anytime soon.
The trust - from what I understand, my brothers will inherit 1/3 each of the estate and the remaining 1/3 will be used to keep the house running until they turn 18. After that it will be up to me if I want to keep the house or sell it. At that point my brothers will still have money left in the trust so they can branch out or do whatever they want, otherwise I will not sell the house and just pass it on to them or keep it and maintain it myself and they can just stay with me as long as they need to.
(Edit to the edit) So I just spoke to Jane and she told me that the reason she dissolved the trust is because originally it was going to be split 3x between us kids and my dad would inherit the house. She dissolved my 3rd and switched it over to make it to take care of the house maintenance, and instead put the house in my name so my dad wouldn't get it. Plus by doing that at least financially I would be getting a much bigger share (the house is worth about 1.5x the amount of my brothers trusts) I just wouldn't be able to do anything with it until my brothers are 18, which I'm totally cool with. Sorry if I don't have a better answer but I'm just trying to translate what she told me.
My parents - The big fight happened on Sunday and I haven't spoken to either of my parents since, I think they're both at my mom's place right now but that's fine with us because we're all still mad at them so they can stay gone for all we care. I know technically that's not legal to just leave us alone but I've been taking care of my brothers for over a year I can handle a few days while he gets his shit together. Screw both of them.
Hope that clears some stuff up.
TLDR; My bio parents tried to screw my terminally ill stepmother out of trust fund money, but she caught on and now no one on my side of the family gets anything.
Additional Information from OOP on her parents, stepmom’s health, trust funds
OOP: (Why isn't Jane on dialysis) - I don't remember the exact details but Jane has a genetic condition where she gets cysts on her kidney. She already had a transplant a few years ago but now she developed problems with her arteries or something in her legs so she doesn't qualify for dialysis. She could get another transplant but she doesn't want to because the last time was so traumatic (rejections, etc). So she decided to just let herself go onto maintenance medications to prolong her death until she gets her affairs in order. She has a few other health problems that make the typical treatments really dangerous and according to her she'd rather die surrounded by loved ones than on an operating table.
(Dissolving the trust fund) - Jane told me she didn't technically have to do it, but she didn't trust my bio parents not to do something shady and get a hold of the money before I turn 18. Even if my aunt controlled the fund my dad would still be able to collect if something happened to Jane before I turn 18. Her lawyer suggested it's better safe than sorry and I agreed that it was the best option. I'm not an expert tho I don't know the details.
(How my mom knew) - Like I said before I'm pretty sure Jane told my dad, who then told my mom and that's how the argument started. I can't think of any other way and I didn't really care enough to ask.
(Jane's thoughts on my mom) - she didn't know my mom was doing all of that. My mom has her own place and would only come over whenever Jane was in the hospital for a few days at a time. I've been living with my dad for a little over a year so he probably told Jane that my mom was there to spend time with me, if he told her at all. Besides she didn't "move in" until a few months ago, which I guess is when they started hatching their plan. Jane never outright banned my mom from visiting so there really wasn't anything she could do.
Hope that helps.
Edit for the last part: The remainder of the money belonging to the estate that hasn't been put into trusts for my brothers is going to be used to maintain the house (utilities, taxes, etc) until my brothers are 18 and then I can either choose to sell the house or keep it and maintain it myself if I'm able to. I plan to go to school in that time and get a better job with the goal of keeping the house, but if I can't then I have the option to sell it. Not that I will but that's how it was explained to me.
OOP on her stepmom and their relationship, provides thoughts on her bio mom
OOP: Honestly it's because she's more of a "real" mom than my actual mom.
My bio mom is kind of ambiguous about my existence but Jane was always extra involved, sending me to sports teams and paying for dance classes and just showing interest in my hobbies as I got older. Plus as the only girl I think we bonded on a level she can't with my brothers so she always made sure to let me know I was on equal terms with them. When I was younger we would watch movies and have girl time where it was just us 1:1 and those are some of my best memories with her.
Jane is also really mature and someone I wanna be like when I get older whereas it feels like my mom is a teenager in an adult's body. She was constantly picking fights with my dad about dumb things and Jane was always there to smooth things over and keep my best interest at heart over her own feelings. I know my mom made Jane's life really difficult for a long time but Jane never complained or said anything to me about it whereas my mom CONSTANTLY complained about Jane. As I got older I just always felt more at peace when I was around Jane than when I was around my mom.
If you want your step kids to love you just be there for them and treat them like your own. Ignore whatever drama you have with your husbands ex and just love your kids. Trust me if you really care about them they will know.
Relevant Comments
mattdvs1979: My only advice is make sure you work with a lawyer once she passes so you get your inheritance and your parents can’t try to intervene, and then you keep your promise to use that money for you and your brothers’ welfare.
OOP: Oh absolutely, Jane already gave me the lawyer's info and between him and my step-aunt I'm sure I will be able to do what I need to do for them. I don't even care about the money, most people don't have trust funds and turn out just fine. I'm actually more glad that she gave me the house because you can be damn sure it's going to be a safe space for my brothers whether I end up getting custody of them or not. My brothers are basically Jane's legacy so my goal is to give them the life and guidance that I got from her, and that they won't get because she'll be gone.
OOP on the relationship between her father and her stepmom before they got exposed
OOP: Honestly it hurts a lot because before Jane got sick they seemed to have the perfect relationship. Until my birthgiver (I like that) came in and fucked everything up with her toxic personality. Honestly in a perfect world my mom will end up broke and alone and in a shitty nursing home with bed sores. And when she calls me and begs me for a relationship (because she needs the attention) it'll feel so good to hang up on her over and over again.
OOP on Jane (stepmom)’s health and if Jane is mentally okay on the whole situation
OOP: I think so. Apparently it's a genetic disease so she always knew she was going to get sick she just didn't know when so mentally I think she was prepared for it. I just hope that she can find peace knowing the truth and knowing that I'll be there to make sure her sons don't grow up all fucked up.
OOP on her brothers getting therapy to deal with their mom/step-mom’s health and her imminent death
OOP: Yeah. I've already sat them down and talked to them about what's going on, they seem to understand but they're understandably really sad about the whole thing. I told them that when they go to school they should ask about a grief counselor and I'm trying to get their health insurance info from Jane so I can find them a therapist for kids. As much as all of this sucks I think it's brought the three of us a lot closer together.
Thanks a lot. I really love my brothers and I know it's my job to take care of them properly now that they won't have a mom around. Jane did so much to raise me and my brothers won't have the opportunity so it's only right that I help them.
Since finding all of this out my plan has always been to have my brothers live with me, I'm already in charge of taking care of them and the house for the most part the only thing my dad does is help pay the bills. Unfortunately I won't be able to kick my dad out as long as he's their legal guardian which is why I'm trying to find some other solution to that. But if/when that gets resolved he can live under a bridge for all I care.
 
Update: May 8, 2024 (3 months later)
Please check my profile for my previous post. :)
Hi guys it’s me again, a lot of you asked me for an update on my situation with Jane and my family so I’ve come back with a few things that have happened since I initially posted. I will try to organize this in a way that addresses the major points of last time.
Jane is still alive and doing surprisingly well considering the circumstances. She’s always been a fighter and although her disease has been progressing she’s keeping a positive attitude with everything that is going on. She says she’s grateful that she was able to see everyone’s true colors before she passed so she could go into the next life knowing the truth. We have become so unbelievably close in the past few months and it’s getting harder and harder to know that she’s getting close to the end. She doesn’t ever talk about it though and I know it’s because she doesn’t want to hurt me but we both know the situation so we’re just making the best of our time. I'm also not being completely transparent about all of the drama at home but tbh I don't think she needs to hear all of that.
We did end up having that surprise celebration of life that I planned, a lot more people showed up than I thought but they all got an airbnb near the hospital where Jane is and we were able to take her out and spend some time at the lake near the facility. It was super lowkey which I know Jane preferred and I was even able to get her old college friend to come after I found him on Linkedin lol. We had food and there was music and we played games and it was overall a really great time, except Jane started crying at the end but she promised me it was just because she was grateful.
My brothers are also doing okay, my aunt (Jane's sister) is currently paying for them to go to therapy and they've become a lot more open about talking about the situation. They just turned 13 but a lot of the time it feels like I'm talking to actual adults lol. They've become really independent lately (in a good way) and aside from me driving them places I don't really have to do much for them anymore. Their grades aren't super great but they're not failing and considering the circumstances it could be a lot worse. They still hang out with friends and I'm keeping an eye out for like depression symptoms and stuff.
The situation with my mom is as funny as it is embarrassing tbh. She spent a few weeks ignoring us and then she tried to crawl back into my life basically begging me to let her move in because her lease is about to expire and she has nowhere to go. That convo went about as well as you'd think and she ended up calling me an ungrateful b**** and that I couldn't just ignore her because she's my mom. I told her to get out of the house before I call the cops and to go back to my dad (who at that point was only coming home every few days to "check on us" and grab some clothes.)
After that she tried coming by a few times and when I wouldn't open the door she would lose her mind and start yelling through the neighborhood. After three instances of this I finally called the cops but because I'm 17 they told me there's a possibility that I would have to go home with her since technically I'm a minor and need to be with the custodial parent. I told them no way because I was the only one watching my brothers atm. That led to a whole thing where after a few hours my dad basically showed up and I was allowed to stay there because there was finally an adult present and I'd basically lived there for over a year.
After that the cops firmly told my mom that if she keeps showing up and causing drama (my neighbors confirmed that she'd been there a few times screaming) that they would arrest her for trespassing since technically it was Jane's house and not hers. She left and hasn't tried coming to the house anymore but for a while she would call me constantly telling me I owed her and all kinds of stuff. She's now blocked on everything and anything she needs to say to me gets filtered through my dad.
As for my dad... well, since he's basically required to be here for another 2 months until I turn 18 we've basically just avoided each other. It's not too bad though because I've been heavily relying on guilting him for everything to get my way. For example he was going to contest the divorce but I threatened to kick him out when I turn 18 if he does that so he just signed all the paperwork for a "quickie divorce" and is basically doing whatever Jane tells him to do. I don't openly disrespect him or anything (he's still my dad) but I've made it clear that I have no intentions on doing anything he says ever again and he doesn't fight me on it. Most of the time he's just in his room and sometimes he'll go back to my mom's but only for a day or two before they argue and she kicks him out again lol. I haven't decided whether or not I'll kick him out yet and we haven't talked about it either so I'm kind of playing it by ear.
As for me, I'm handling everything as good as I can. I found a new job where I make a little more money so I've been focusing on saving as much as I can and just being there for my brothers. Between working and school and visiting Jane I've been so busy I haven't really had time to really stop and think about everything, but I know it'll come. One of my friends has really stepped up and helped me manage everything and I'm super grateful to him for being there for me and my brothers so we'll see how that goes.
Anyways I wish I had something more exciting to share but that's what's happened since my last post :) Thanks again for all the support on my last post.
Relevant Comments
OOP on the possibility of her stepmom being poisoned from her parents to get Jane’s money
OOP: Hi there,
A few people have mentioned this and yes we are absolutely certain she is not being poisoned, it’s a genetic disease causing her kidney failure and we have known about it for a long time but she shielded us from the worst of it hence why her “sudden” decline in health was such a shock to us, we thought she had more time.
My brothers have also been screened for this disease and thankfully neither of them have it.
Edit to add: I’m turning 18 in a few weeks so I don’t need to get emancipated and my dad has already agreed that my brothers will stay in the house with me because they have nowhere else to go.
OOP on Jane making video clips for her brothers
OOP: Yes actually a few people suggested this on my last post and we have been doing this for a few weeks now. Jane has a little digital recorder that she’s been putting her thoughts down on and she’s also written a few letters to us for major milestones. My brothers do not know about this as we want to surprise them but that said they have been coming to the hospital more now that they’re in therapy and able to deal with it. I know they do not want to have any regrets even though it’s a difficult situation.
OOP on her father after being exposed and her bio mom trying to manipulate him
OOP: I do think he’s remorseful, he hasn’t said it but the way he’s acting is telling me that, he’s being really passive when normally he gets a little belligerent if he really feels like he didn’t do anything wrong. Also I know I have every reason to kick him out but he’s still my dad even tho what he did to Jane was terrible. He’s just kind of a weak minded person and my bio mom really manipulated the crap out of him and continues to manipulate him but I can tell he’s getting tired of her BS because he’s spending less time with her.
He didn’t know she was showing up at the house and when he found out he was super pissed at her, they’ve been fighting nonstop and I can tell he’s not as much under her spell anymore because he’s at home more but who knows.
 

DO NOT COMMENT IN LINKED POSTS OR MESSAGE OOPs – BoRU Rule #7

THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT OOP

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2024.05.15 05:59 haughtmi Question About a Home Loan

I'm looking to buy a home in Michigan and want to ask the community if there are home loan lenders that will listen to my credit story and not just look at the score/report? My score used to be 800+, but went down to under 500 about 4 years ago, and then now I have it back above 680. There were several reasons my score went down, and a large part of it was that my SC disabilities were really bad at the same time I was caring for a Navy veteran who had terminal cancer. The first 8 months I took care of her, her parents didn't pay me, so my credit use got out of control. Since that time, I've been declared 100% P&T by the VA, and have paid off over 80% of my debt off. I'm back to being responsible with my money and maybe there's someone out there who has some guidance? Thanks.
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2024.05.15 05:56 A_person_from_Asia Soon to be homeless girl’s letter to her mom to convince her to let me stay and finish school.

Hey mom do you trust me to make my own decisions? Because I think for the first time I want something super bad and I want to fight for it. I know it’s my fault for not getting along with my host parents but I also need you to understand that I can no longer live with them. They are drunks who can’t be relied on, and I’m a kid wanting to finish high school in the US without transferring again. The moment that I was born in America you guys had plans to let me graduate high school there. So let me do that. I feel bad for being such a burden financially and emotionally. But maybe this is just a part of parenting, and I’ve been also parenting myself. I made some risky decisions and I’ve become somewhat immoral and also a bit of a degenerate. I’ve found an empty office space that I can squat in — which is a term for living there illegally without anyone knowing. But there are also empty spaces in the office that goes for about a 350$ per month which is the amount that you guys pay the host family. Since I am qualified for free lunch I can get food from school and in the weekends I can cook for myself using cheap materials. This is how I plan on living here next year and finishing my senior year mommy. And I hope that although this is less than ideal you will come to terms that this is what I want and I hope that this time you guys will let me conquer it by myself and find my own path. I’m half a year away from 18 and I feel ready to make such bold decisions for myself. I can just keep on staying in the one unlocked and unoccupied office but because of the fact that staying there without paying this is illegal I will look into renting the small office space leasing for 350$ and I think that I can have my host family to sign the lease and that you can continue to pay the 350$ to them. I’m forever thankful for everything you do for me and I need your support for continuing to move forward.
A section that I’m scared to mention to her: I’ve tested sleeping there many times. 3 nights to be exact. When they were so drunk and threatened to kill me (which i know is just bluff but I was scared and ran to the unlocked office) I slept 2 comfy nights there. Right now I chose to sleep here again because they were arguing and extremely loud. I hope this doesn’t disappoint you.
Background info, I was born in the US but my parents raised me in a different country since they never migrated to the US. When I was in 10th grade I was sent to my aunt in the USA but I didn’t get along w her and I was sent back at the end of the school year. Currently I’m a junior, my mom managed to help me stay with her friends who is my current host family. However them and I also have our problems and living with them is stressful. My mom wants me to come back home and study back in my country. But I have falled in love with my school. The building I mention is extremely close to my school which is why It’s so desired. However I am unlikely to ever send this letter to her without modifying and filtering most of the content. I wish I could be honest with her but I think I’ll chalk it up to a friend’s dad who has a place for me to stay in.
Dear internet parents, how do you feel reading this? What are some other plan of action I could take? I’m in North of Illinois and could use all the help I could get but I’ve been denied from many organizations already.
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http://rodzice.org/