So my first therapy session is Thursday. It’s taken me a long, long, time to make this first step. Last week I finally just came clean to my wife about my on-going sex and porn addiction. It was eating me alive inside and I just couldn’t go on living with these secrets.
She’s being supportive but her idea of me is completely shattered. Everything she thought I was is a lie (she said).
She keeps asking if getting it off my chest has made me feel any better but the truth is…no. I feel so stupid for admitting everything to her. I feel so judged. I feel so inadequate and inferior. I feel like I’ve let my family down. We aren’t telling the kids. But I still feel awful. I feel like the secret was safe with me and now I risk exposure to our friends and family and I’m sick to my stomach.
So sick that I’ve become impotent. Sex is the last thing on my mind right now. I feel zero desire to have sex or masturbate right now.
I’ve deleted all of my “favorites” from my phone. I’m posting using my “fake” profile that I used to pursue my fantasies and fetishes on. I’ve deleted my profiles on the sites I used for hookups and escorts. I’ve deleted all my email accounts that I used to hide my activities.
I’m praying that this therapist can help me overcome my addictions. I’ve been a porn addict for decades. I was molested as a young teen by a man who lived across the street from me. He used porn to groom me basically. Because of what happened to me as a teen when I became an adult I sought out xxx arcades with GH's, joined sex finder apps, gay dating sites, used Backpage for casual encounters with men and trans women, hired trans escorts routinely, everything and anything to try to and satiate my appetites. I used people as human Fleshlights to get me off for years.
I finally woke up and realized what I have been doing and how hollow and empty and ashamed I am.
I truly hope I can overcome this and find a way to enjoy intimacy with my wife without the use of porn, fetishes, etc., again.
I hope I didn't give too much details. Just trying to give context.
I feel so lost right now.
I hope I'm doing this for the right reasons. Thankfully there is no law enforcement component to this. But I am very afraid of how far I can go if I don't get help now.
Thank you for creating this space. I have nowhere else to turn for support, advice, guidance. Until Thursday.

I keep seeing people post about getting attacked by off-leash dogs and I was LITERALLY just talking with my boyfriend yesterday about how I wanted to start carrying something for protection when I walk our Tamaskan and Husky/Mal mix. Hours after that discussion the dogs and I went out for our evening walk around the neighborhood. We were almost home and passing the house of this nice lady who always blows kisses at my dogs. She was standing on her front porch smoking a cigarette and she had one of her small dogs out with her off leash. It was something like a maltipoo; fluffy white and maybe 10 pounds? We were on the other side of the street and this dog came at us with everything it had. It charged right up to my Tamaskan, who is a long and lean 75 pounds, and they made contact. It all happened so fast, I couldn't even tell if my dog had picked it up or if it had jumped up and grabbed onto mine's neck. I'm sure it was only seconds but it felt like forever. All I could think while I was trying to keep my husky/mal back AND trying to break up the fight was "oh my God he's going to kill this dog in the street". And then it was over! Did the dog let go or did my dog drop him? The little dog shook it off and trotted back across the street. The owner never even made it out of her yard. I was trying to check my dog to make sure he was ok, he seemed to be preoccupied sniffing the ground. Maybe the little dog had peed there? I yelled "is your dog ok?!" in total shock about it all. She yelled back "yea he's ok!", he was still shaking it off. They went inside and I hurried down the street a bit with my dogs. My tamaskan went RIGHT back to normal walk mode. When we got home he growled at me more than usual (mine is vocal about lots of things) when I took his collar off, I couldn't see or feel any injures. I told my boyfriend about it but he didn't seem to concerned about the actual event. I cried, a lot. I'm so glad it wasn't a bigger, more dangerous dog that we encountered, but neither of my dogs nor I needed that experience. I have been feeling more and more anxious about walking them in my neighborhood and now after this, I feel so defeated and sad.

When I learned about 12th house placements, everything suddenly made sense. I’ve had friends who became enemies. people I barely know who try to take my ideas copy my art. i’ve had people who I thought were very close to me or people in positions of power who are meant to help me suddenly turn on me unexpectedly. Now that I know that I have a 12th Stellium in my sun, Mercury, and Jupiter in virgo everything makes sense. I often feel misunderstood yet for some reason there’s always people attempting to copy everything I do. I also have bouts of isolation. For example, I’m now in an academic setting and I’ve been studying for seven years. and academia I’ve dealt with plenty of people who have taken my ideas and publish papers. However, this trouble began way before adulthood.
For example, when I got older, my mother told me the story about when I was in preschool. my teacher would basically wear a clown mask and scare me and another child then lock us in the bathroom in the dark. The only reason why my mother found out was because the other child was having nightmares and the parent took them to the preschool to confront the staff and figure out what was going on, the other teacher finally let her know what our teacher was doing to us. Could you imagine doing this to a two year-old? growing up I had no idea this happened to me however I did have (what I thought was) an irrational fear of the dark until I was in high school and had to always sleep with a nightlight. It wasn’t until college that my mother finally told me this story. So then my fear that i did not remember was not irrational but deep with in my subconscious which seems to align with 12house themes.
When I was younger I often had adults who were suspicious of me for no reason. I was a quiet child and often very observant. I had a lot of anxiety because I could see through people in a way that others could not. At the time I did not know that this was the root of my anxiety. But now that I’m older, I know that when someone is aware that you see the parts of them that they are trying to hide, they become deeply uncomfortable with you. So this is something I often experience as a child.
In my dating life I’ve been a repository for broken people and often attract people who project an air of confidence, but are deeply insecure. I’ve had false starts and moment where I’ve stayed too long. And it seems in my dating life and with people around me there is often a projection they see me completely different than what I see myself. Of course this is not everybody and I’ve had friends who witnessed moments when people have done this to me. specifically people who are in positions of power I realize people were deeply insecure, will often see a mirror when they look at me they do not see me, but a reflection of their deepest Insecurities. This of course is both a blessing and a curse it seems I become a lesson in someway to those people without even meaning to.
I’ve also had bouts of isolation right now. I’m in academia where again I have to deal with people and their projections. Honestly, when the pandemic hit and I didn’t have to deal with people in person, my anxiety went down significantly, and I felt at peace. As soon as I was back on campus, the projections, the misunderstandings and hidden enemies surface. People who are supposed to be my colleagues were taking my ideas. One person I barely talk to you. I told them about my dissertation project and they published a whole paper. Another person who I worked with on on a different assignment ended up using my ideas for their whole dissertation. Anyways this is the end of my rant but do wonder does this ever get better?

I am STILL NOT the Original Poster. That is u/ta-bff-234324. He posted in AITAH and amiwrong but posted the same text in both subreddits. I chose to use the ones from AITAH
Thanks again to u/Literally_Taken for the rec and to Choice Evidence and u/chickenoodledeprived for letting me know about the update!
Previous BORU here. New update marked with ****\*
Trigger Warning: racism
Mood Spoiler: tentatively happy ending
Original Post: April 1, 2024
My (29M) best friend Jess (29F) keeps on mentioning my ex (29F) in front of my fiancee, and I am thinking of cutting her off. I want to know if I am overreacting, or if Jess is in the wrong.
For context, Jess and I went to the same high school and the same college. We were friends in high school. However, since we both went to the same out-of-state college, we became best friends since then. We have always been there for each other during the best and worst times. However, things have always been platonic, and she is more like a big sister to me, who made sure I stay on the right track.
I have only been in two long-term relationships so far. One was with my ex Lisa for 7 years. We met in college and dated all through our college years. Lisa and Jess also became good friends, too. After college, Lisa and I just grew apart and had different goals in life. I became "boring" after college as I was working on my PhD while doing a full time job. Lisa broke up with me as she wanted to party on weekends, while I was home studying. I was heartbroken, but I don't think I ever blamed her or had resentment towards her, as I understood my decisions were selfish and should not hold her back from having the best life.
Jess always stood by me and comforted me during that time. Jess and Lisa were good friends and Jess always kept on telling me that Lisa loves me and will be back one day when I am ready. I foolishly held on to that hope and stayed friends with Lisa. That was until I met my fiancee Yang. After I finished my PhD, I got a nice job in a big tech company. Yang joined our team a year after me. We started going out for drinks, and dinner and we started dating seriously pretty soon. We are happy together, and financially in a great place. Needless to say, I stopped talking to Lisa after I started dating Yang.
I proposed to Yang a year after we started dating and got engaged last year. Jess has been acting weirdly since we got engaged. One of the first things she said to Yang after we got engaged was how I had planned the same thing for Lisa (proposing on a local hiking trail). It was a bit off-putting that she was bringing up Lisa whom I broke up with almost 5 years ago on such a happy occasion. However, Yang asked me to not spoil my mood, as she felt Jess was just commenting on how I had that plan in mind for years. Since then, every time we meet, Jess without fail brings up Lisa and how the things I am doing are all the things I had planned with Lisa. This happened when we bought a house, planned for vacations, etc. Jess always starts with some nostalgic story and then brings up how Lisa and I were so happy together. She is still good friends with Lisa and keeps giving me updates about Lisa and how great Lisa is doing at work when no one is asking for it. It felt like she was painting a rosy picture of Lisa to Yang and telling Yang that she would always be second to Lisa.
Yang told me Jess's comments bothered her, and I also felt the same. I have brought this up with Jess many times and asked her not to do it. However, she says she will try but since I dated Lisa for 7 years, she would be part of many stories from the past. Also, she asked me why talking about Lisa bothers me and if I still have feelings for her. I have reduced hanging out with Jess. However, she is close with my mom and is always invited to all our family parties and holidays.
I talked to my mom and sister about this and they feel I am overreacting. They feel Jess is just telling stories and since the stories are mostly from college days and later, Lisa will be a character in the story. They also feel I should not be bothered by Jess mentioning Lisa since we broke up a long time ago. I feel that it's disrespectful to Yang as she doesn't need to hear about all the fun Lisa and I had when we were together and how we were planning to get married. Do you think I am the asshole to stop here or Jess is truly acting out of line?
Relevant Comments:
Commenter: Probably need to separate your time with your fiancé away from your friend. ... On a side note, your friend comes across poorly on one other aspect. When you were too busy to date so you could study. She is encouraging you to stay available while your ex goes about dating around? Think she ever encouraged your ex to not? Or do you think she was telling your ex she could have all the fun she wanted cause you'd still be around? Food for thought.

OOP: She thought we were 24 when we broke up and she always justified that Lisa was young and it's natural to date around before you settle down. She also encouraged me to do the same. However, after my breakup, I decided that I would not be in a relationship (based on what happened to the previous one) and never dated anyone until after I graduated.

Commenter: Not wrong, in fact it's thoughtful of your finace's feelings. " Jess always kept on telling me that Lisa loves me and will be back one day when I am ready." - yikes.
An easy: "Jess, you keep bringing up my ex, and keep making comments which are dismissive of my relationship with Yang. I am telling you point blank that this is harming our friendship and it saddens me that you dismiss my feelings as being unimportant on this topic. If you can't respect me, and my relationship with Yang, please understand why it will likely end our friendship."

OOP: We have had this exact conversation. Jess then proceeded to ask Yang is she offended by her telling stories about me. Yang was polite and said she is ok. Then she told me I am being too sensitive.

Commenter: Op do you know if Lisa is married? Maybe Jess is trying to sabotage your engagement so you can be with Lisa.

OOP: I know Lisa is single. She has not been in any serious long term relationship after me. Infant, Jess always makes it a point to bring that up regularly and update me, even after I tell her I have no interest. My mom loves gossip and they also discuss a out Lisa regularly.

Jess is just being a mean girl/have you talked to Lisa at all?
At this point, I suspect Jess is just being mean to Yang. I would have cut her off long ago if she was not so close to me or my family for so many years.
Lisa is out of the picture, to be honest. I have completely gone no contact with her for the last 2 years.
Jess has feelings for you:
That's not true. I did not write it since I thought it was irrelevant, but Jess is happily married and has a 3 year old kid.
There is no consensus bot on AITAH, but top comments were NTA
Update Post: April 23, 2024 (22 days later)
I wrote a post a month ago regarding my friend Jess mentioning my ex constantly in front of my fiancée. Thanks to everyone who commented, and how inappropriate it was. However, the last month has been nothing but crazy and I still trying to make sense of what happened so far.
After my post, I decided to talk to Jess and gave her an ultimatum not to speak about my ex Lisa again. I know Jess and Lisa are still friends, but I was uncomfortable of her comparing my fiancée Yang with Lisa all the time. I broke up with Lisa 5 years ago, and she is nothing but a faint memory in my past. Jess kept on defending herself and telling me that I was with Lisa for most of my adult life and it's hard to tell any stories from the past without including her. She also blamed me for being emotionally childish and just forgetting about Lisa when she was with me for 7 years. Finally, Jess agreed that she will not bring up Lisa in front of Yang, and I should also not treat Lisa as she does not exist since she is still Jess's friend. I informed Yang about our conversation. Although she was appreciative about it, she said I did not need to do it and she knows how much I love her and every time Jess brings up my Lisa, she feels sorry for Lisa that she let a guy like me go.
Yang went to visit China two weeks ago for a month as we plan to get married in her hometown. She is taking care of her shopping as well as preparations for the wedding. Jess invited me to her house that Friday for dinner as I was home alone. I am also good friends with her husband, and we were all just chatting and drinking in the living room. Around 7.30pm, the doorbell rang, and Jess excitedly went to open the door. To my surprise, it was fucking Lisa at the door. She was all dressed up as if she were ready for a date and came in. I had not seen her in person for almost 3 years and I was shocked to see her. She sat down and started making small talk with me. I was extremely uncomfortable and went into the kitchen to talk to Jess. I was angry at her and asked her what was going on. She kept on telling me that it's been 5 years since the breakup and to get over it and be nice to Lisa. She said Lisa was excited to meet me and she thought we were all adults and could have one fun evening together. We had a fight and I told her that she should not have invited Lisa after our conversation the other day and I do not want to be friends with her anymore. I went into the living room and politely excused myself and told everyone that I had a work emergency and had to leave early. Lisa looked sad, but I genuinely felt uncomfortable to be made to hang out with my ex without my consent.
I came home and called Yang. I have never seen her more furious, and she told me she is not comfortable with Jess anymore as she has some agenda that we do not know about. It's different to talk about Lisa, but to invite her without consulting is not ok. I also felt the same and I called Jess the next day and told her that she crossed a line, and I was terribly upset with her. I stopped taking her calls and ghosted her. I also told my mom and sister about the whole incident.
Last Sunday, my mom called me for lunch. When I got there, I saw Jess was already there. I told my mom that I do not want to talk to Jess and can't stay. However, she asked me to sit as they all wanted to talk to me. I have a glutton for punishment and decided to hear them out. My mom started with how Jess has been there for me all these years and only has my best interest at heart. She kept on telling me that they are the three people (mom, sister, and Jess) that love me the most. Jess started saying how she felt that I was making a big mistake in not having to hear what Lisa had to say. She told me that Lisa was my first love and Lisa is now ready to settle down and we can pick where we left off. She reminded me how broken I was when Lisa left me and how life is giving me a second chance. My sister also chimed in and said how they all liked Lisa more than Yang and how we both looked so great together. Finally, my mom started saying how our culture was so different than Yang and it is hard for them to relate to her. I asked them in what way, and my mom said that they did not understand what Yang says sometimes and have nothing in common with her. Then my mom asked me to think about how Lisa and I would have such wonderful looking kids, while if I marry Yang, our kids will look so different. I started getting their drift and I probed more. My mom told me how our kids would look Asian with "small eyes" and not like any others in the family.
I asked my mom if she cared about my kids looks more and not about how smart they will be since Yang has a PhD. She blew it off, and I realized she just did not want me to marry Yang because she was Chinese and not white. My mom told me to forgive Jess and my mom asked Jess to talk to Lisa on my behalf and asked her if she would be interested in getting back together with me. My mom was adamant that since I loved Lisa so much, I should be happy and pick up things where we left off as that is the best for everyone. I have never been so angry and may have said a lot of unkind things to all of them before I left
I am so depressed right now. I not only lost my best friend, but also am not sure how I can move on from what my mom said. My mom and sister raised me and that is the reason where I am today. However, I cannot get over how racist they are being and how they were just pretending to like Yang all these years while actively working on breaking us up. I have been so shocked that I have not told any of this to Yang so far. I might wait for her to come back next week and talk to her in person.
Again, thanks everyone for all your messages on the last post as they helped me a lot to think through the situation. My life is more fucked up than I could imagine, and I cannot imagine how dejected Yang will feel after hearing all this.
*****New Update Post: May 7, 2024 (5 weeks after OG post)****\*
I wrote a post two months ago regarding my best friend Jess constantly bringing up my ex when talking to my fiancée Yang. I wrote an update two weeks ago about my mom, sister and Jess scheming about trying to get me back with my ex Lisa because they were uncomfortable with Yang being Chinese. They tried to do it when my fiancée was visiting her parents and I felt so betrayed by their actions.
As I said in the previous post, I blew up on my mom and sister about what they said and immediately left. I did not take calls from them or answer texts for the next several days. Their messages initially were anger towards me on why I left before they could finish what they wanted to say. However, I think they realized on day 3 that they might have crossed the line this time and became extremely apologetic. I finally messaged them to leave me alone and not to contact Yang or I until we contact them. Jess did not message me the whole time.
I did not tell Yang about the situation until she came back home 9 days ago. I initially did not know how to bring up the subject, but she sensed something was wrong and asked me about it. I was so worried about hurting her, but I told her about what happened. I was upfront about the stunt Jess pulled and she was angry at Jess. I also told her about my visit to my mother's place, but she did not react with any anger. She just asked me if I was ok.
The next few days were confusing where I was more upset than Yang. She was just excited showing me all pictures and telling me stories. Finally, on last Thursday evening, she opened up and asked me if I was ok about my mom's behavior and what I plan to do. I told her my thoughts and how I cannot forgive them for what they said about her being Asian and them wanting me to marry a Lisa because she was white. I asked her why she was not more upset as it was bothering me.
She told me that when she told her parents about me, they had the exact same reaction for her dating someone who was not Chinese. Her family is very traditional, and her parents were very upset about her decision. It took them a few months to warm up to me and accept me. She never told me about this because she wanted me to have good relationship with her parents. She told me that now they are the most excited doing arrangements for our wedding.
She told me that she has always felt something was off when she talked to my mom, my sister or Jess and they did not like her. My mom and sister would be very friendly with her in front of me, but never invited her for anything when I am not around. She suspected that it may be due to fact that she is not white and does not understand the American traditions. She said she is not upset with them and now that this is in the open, she should talk to them and assure them that she would be as good of a wife as Lisa or any other girl. She said that she does not want to break a family in order to start a new one.
Despite my protests, Yang invited my mom and sister for lunch on Sunday. She said that it would be good for us to talk about everything and hear why they are concerned about her marrying me. I was really not happy with this, but Yang spent most of Sunday morning cooking for them.
When my mom and sister arrived, there were a lot of waterworks and apologies. My mom apologized to Yang and me for her behavior and told us that she would never bring it up again. My sister also was quiet and had tears in her eyes. There were a lot of blame games. My mom and my sister were blaming Jess for constantly telling them how Yang might not be great for me and how she won't fit into our family. My mom and sister fought with Jess after I left and Jess blamed Lisa. Based on Jess's story, Lisa has been depressed for the last few years and when I suddenly got engaged to Yang, it became worse. Jess thought I was also depressed after Lisa left me, because I did not date anyone for 3 years. In reality, I just wanted to focus on my work and studies and never had time. So, Lisa convinced Jess that she has to get back together with me as that is what I wanted too. Jess said how sorry she felt for Lisa as she was her longtime friend and listened to her plan as she thought it was good for everyone.
My mom and sister told us that I should stay away from Jess because she orchestrated the whole situation. They kept on hugging Yang and apologizing to her. Yang in turn also started crying and telling them that she will do better to fit in with them. It was all a big mess. I am still skeptical of my mom's change in heart, but I also want to see Yang happy. However, I think it will take a lot of time and healing before I could truly trust my mom and sister.
Currently, my mom invited us to lunch at her place next week and told me that Jess will not be there. Jess has still not message me or Yang. I really don't know what I can do in this situation. I am still upset and furious at my mom, but I also want to respect Yang's effort to keep the family together. Thanks to everyone for all the messages and supportive comments. It really helped reading them when I was feeling very sad.

I am NOT the Original Poster. That is u/Remarkable_Treat_636. He posted in AmItheAsshole
Trigger Warnings: miscarriage; depression; addiction
Mood Spoiler: tentatively hopeful ending?
Original Post: May 6, 2024
I (20m) and my sister (23) have been very close since she lost her baby. She lost the baby at the end of 2022, when she was about 5 months pregnant. Obviously our whole family was shocked and very supportive initially. However I really tried to help her through this and get her back on her feet. Coming to her apartment to clean, and cook her food. It also doesn’t help that her baby daddy left shortly after. My sister was unable to work because of her depression, so my family would help chip in and pay her bills. She remained like this for about 7 months when my parents told her that they couldn’t no longer support her, when all she does is lay in bed (and smoke a lot, like 24/7, but they don’t know that), and that she at least needs to look for a job. She lashed out and said she needs their support now more than ever. Regardless of them, I began to solely supporting her. Mind you I still live with my parents and attending school.
That brings us to last Friday, I have about 3 semesters left of school and money has been getting tight. I told my sister that I really need to start saving, and that she needs to get a job, or just move back in. She lashed out on me, saying that I could never understand (100% true) and that I was a terrible brother for even mentioning it. I said excuse me? I’ve paying for your bills for over a year, and have been the only one trying to help her get over this. She began yelling at me and calling me terrible names. I just snapped and said idgaf about her dead baby. I did none of this for that baby. I helped her because I love my sister, I want what’s best for my sister, I want her to recover. I told her this and just she started attacking me. I just left.
The next morning my parents sat me down, and told me what I said was very wrong and rude. I explained what happened and how I still continued paying her bills after they stopped. They just were quiet, and then just left. My mother grabbed my shoulder and told me that my sister started apply for jobs.
I really feel bad, but also to a certain degree it worked and she is at least looking to work. I know my sister will forgive me eventually but I still feel bad. AITA?
Relevant Comments:
Commenter: You shouldn't have said you don't care about the baby... but. But she was clearly in a hole she had no intention of climbing out of, and sometimes the only way to help people like that is to toss in a stick of dynamite and blast them out, which is precisely what you did. The question is how much did it help, and I have a feeling the answer is "not a whole lot".
ESH, especially your parents for essentially letting your sister vegetate in a pot of grief rather than get her into some kind of counseling or therapy.

OOP: Yk you bring up an off topic point. She has been in therapy since shortly after losing her baby. So I’m wondering why the therapy has had no progress and how is her therapist just fine with her like this, without offering additional help. Idk sorry
OOP clarifies in a different comment: Btw I have paid for my sister therapy (off and on) since she lost the baby. And solely after my parents cut her finically

Commenter (downvoted): Are you a child? You have to be if you think therapy is a cure all. Many folks spend the rest of their lives dealing with problems in therapy.

OOP: No, personally I don’t think therapy is for everyone. But it’s annoying thinking how I paid for her appointments to see no progress.

Commenter: Just because you don't see it doesn't mean it isn't there.

OOP: Yeah but when you pay for it for a little less than a year, you’d want to see some progress. Idk I’m not mad at her, rather the waste of money I used on therapy. Regardless I’ll see her tonight and I’ll ask if she feels any improvement from the therapy

Deleted Commenter: Even if there is 1% improvement, it should be worth it. Something like this can take months or years of forever. YTA for expecting grief to be 'fixed' with your set time limit and talking about 'wasting money' when you claim you spend money out of love. You also probably ruined her progress of getting better by what you said to her.While I get that it's frustrating on your end financially, there are better ways to express that. Perhaps you might need therapy as well.

OOP: I think my tone was off. Honestly idc about the therapy or even paying for it. In my mind I rationalized the price of the therapy for the improvement of my sister. But when you see that price it just looks terrible when you don’t see improvement in over a year. I’m not mad at her or the therapist, just aggravated yk?

Commenter: I’m going to be the odd ball and say yes AH, with that being said I totally get why you snapped but as someone that has miscarried before it was the most painful thing I had ever gone through.

OOP: Hey don’t feel odd or outcast of your opinion. All the comments benefit me and help reflect.

OOP ends with:
My sister going to come for dinner, where we will fs talk about what happened. If you guys are interested in an update lmk.
OOP is voted ESH- everyone sucks here
Update Comment: May 7, 2024 (Next Day)
UPDATE
I am very thankful for all the women who shared their experiences and gave me an insight on how my sister is feeling that I would’ve never been able to have. For that I am extremely grateful.
My sister came over for dinner, we didn’t make much contact in the beginning. Our parents didn’t try to make us talk nor bring up our last argument. Dinner was very awkward with very little conversation. We finished eating and my parents left to clean the mess. Which left me and my sister, we made some small talk when I just offered to go outside to talk.
Once we were outside I immediately apologized for what I said, but she cut me off before I could finish. She said she was thankful for me and everything I have done for her. We continued to talk till it was late. She brought up how she applied for 3 jobs in our area. We ended our conversation talking about how stuff happens and sometimes you can only do anything besides pick yourself and move forward , and try not to look back. She hugged me, (no tears) said thanks and left.
I will still continue to pay her bills till she gets back on her feet. The bad blood seems to be gone. At this point I’m not sure if regret what I said, but the damage doesn’t seem impactful. I appreciate all the people who commented.

I’ve been dating a spiritual narcissist and feel hopeless
I feel like I have no voice. If I ever try to speak up, he will diminish what I say, dismiss what I say, and or gas light me. The worst of it all, he had a whole secret life - another partner of 9 years. She is living in Belize. He doesn’t take any accountability or responsibility for cheating or lying. He doesn’t see it this way. We have been together almost a year. I feel trapped. I’m out here on a ranch with him, and I’m on the other side of it crying. I just want to get back home. I want to get all of my things and go… he is just awful. I asked him for help with something so I could get a credit line, and he told me that absolutely I shouldn’t have any credit line. I said what about emergencies? I have no money… he told me well how will you pay it every month. I said it was only 500 credit line, I don’t think it will be that big of a deal, except for that I’m in the middle of no where with him so for now dependent on him… no car of my own. He even asked why I wanted one.. if it was so I can leave him? Ugh. Moments after his telling me how I shouldn’t even have a dollar basically, he starts dancing and bragging how he made 12k in the stock market with his trade and am I so happy for him…. 😒 He also is annoyed if I ask him to drive me and my things back to Houston. The ranch is an hour away. Nights like tonight, after all of the put downs and insults… Criticism about everything I do, how I picked up a dish, how I didn’t let the fish defrost long enough, how much better he would have done things… I feel like I can walk away. Ugh. This is the first narcissist I have ever met.
Also today, I had to listen for the one millionth time about how he has special knowledge that no one else does and he notices it when he’s around others. That he doesn’t feel like he can really find people who are as enlightened as him and …prob he needs to be a teacher and lots of people will follow him bc he has assendend so high. He will brag and go on and on while I clean up the kitchen from dinner, he won’t help. He will watch for me to mess up so he can pause his bragging and criticize how I breath or something. He is always repeating the same scripts… and he likes to talk about from the second he wakes up… how in 5th grade he was the smartest, the teachers All knew…how he this or that…. he said that I wouldn’t have been on his level at kindergarten age.. or he will say things like… what movie do you like? Then I say, and he says that’s a movie with little character development, I haven’t entertained those types since middle school.. or he will play one of his spiritual lectures and at the end say, that was too deep for you to understand. Wtf. It’s like all day, things like this.
And I’m heartbroken that he has this other girl. He told me she’s his stability and so he will stay with her and I’m allowed to be the mistress and publicly the assistant. She is coming back to the US.
I just hate him. I want to leave rn and somehow have him erased from my memory so I won’t cry over this. Ugh. I feel trapped.
Once I leave, I am worried about how much this is going to hurt. Just all of it…. Has anyone dealt with a narcissist? Was it hard to let go? 😒

I apply to countless minimum wage jobs and attend countless interviews = I’m never hired unless the company is desperate. I graduate = I’m in debt for life and my degree is useless. I make art and put it out there = no one wants to see it, no one would notice if I never drew anything in my life again. I make stories and characters = no one cares what will happen, no one would blink if I never thought or spoke of them again. I have a friend = I tire myself out being socially confused, I don’t know how to contact them, how to have them over, how to be in anyone’s life really. I don’t have a friend anymore. I work hard at my creative pursuits = I know nobody in the industry, it doesn’t matter anyway because making and keeping a friend is a one in a million chance. All that work has no worthwhile outlet. It may as well have never happened. I go to therapy = I can no longer afford it, I lose my progress if I made any in the first place, I don’t get better.
It’s summer, I had so many ambitions, so many things I was excited to do when I finally had time. Now I wake up, eat food, apply to jobs, and do some little errand. Then I rot online for hours while I try to figure out what on earth I can do that will either make me happy, or matter to someone.
People always sugar coat it but getting up over and over does not guarantee eventual success. The only thing I can see so clearly about my future is that I will die in the same cycle of falling down and getting up. If I am not capable (I know because I never have been), if I am not wanted (I know because I can see it, I can feel it), if I wasn’t supposed to be here, why am I here? Why do I do anything? How do I find worth in any fleeting thing I have ever or will ever attempt?

Hi I am a (18 f) and my ex best friend (14 f) have been friends for six to five years and me and her met on the bus since her mom is a bus driver but imma call her Ella she and I have been off and on for years but I wanna know if I am the butthole for choosing to not be friends with her and cut off contact with her because of how she was treating our friends and me and some of the things she has done while being friends with me. So this all started back when me and our first were starting to hang out so that was back in 2022. We’re at our house we were talking having fun just chilling around. She had to leave to do something for her family while I was in the room talking to one of her friends, let’s call him Billy me and him didn’t like each other at all but we made sure to be nice to each other when Ella is around but we were constantly bickering at each other, but that’s besides the point she and Billy have been friends for years years and that’s right before I even came into the picture so I was in a different state while she was being friends with Billy bickering at each other, but that’s besides the point she and Billy have been friends for years years and that’s right before I even came into the picture so I was in a different state while she was friends with Billy but those two have been off and on for years friends to lovers time stuff and I was just a third wheel so I was basically just third wheeling them, but while she was dating him, she would have other guys added onto snap like talking to them and entertaining them like what your dating someone while talking to other guys was wild to me I didn’t say anything because I didn’t wanna meddle in their relationship and plus I didn’t really know him at the time barely but me and him have started getting really close and those few months and I decided to tell him that I hope you know your girl has been talking to some other dudes and that’s when he decided to not date her anymore so those two broke up Ella and Billy are friends still and we decided to add another member to our group which would be? laya And me and her don’t know each other about at that time we were getting to know each other and we actually became really good friends Ella thought it would be the best thing ever to be in a poly relationship with Billy and laya and here’s where things take a turn for the worst for five months those three were dating while I was over at our three were dating while I was over at her house SHE WAS TALKING TO OTHER MEN WHILE BEING IN A relationship but that’s not all she had other apps to also talk to hot other men and showing me what she was doing she had me snap them and everything was just a hell no for me and when it got to those three breaking up me and her decided to stop being friends that was right at the same time me and Josh and when it got to those three breaking up me and her just decided to stop being friends that was right at the same time me and Billy and I were talking and we were talking about her behavior and what was going on because he kept saying she kept doing this shit over and over and I was like why would you still be together with her if you knew or since I’ve told you that she was cheating on the three of you and this was back in may or june so it was fresh out of the water type shit and me, Billy, laya decided to drop Ella and start a new friendship circle to say away Ella but we also added a new member her name is Zara and she also had bad encounters with Ella and as we were being friends having fun just being chill , me and Billy started dating we were dating for two months so that was June and July but here comes the funny part. All of us decided to stop being friends and also dating each other because I was busy with school, and they were also busy with school so we just left and not have been friends when it came to me and laya she started to be friends again back in august and we were playing Fortnite we were playing anything talking having fun texting and she asked if I could adopt her. I said yes because why not. And then I found out that Laya and Billy dated broke up and then found out again Zara and Billy are dating by Ella we slowly decided to be friends again to keep the peace and have no more drama but here comes the craziest plot twist. This will happen in 2023 till like 2022 now here comes 2024 rolling in February or always hung out with each other having fun so we were just chilling. Me and Billy were liking each other our whole entire friend group dated him. I didn’t. I only dated him once maybe twice that was it learned my lesson from that but slowly, it was just a type of feelings, but it slowly fades away. That’s what it was happening to me and my daughter laya got grounded from her real parents and told me and our friends that she was grounded for a week so her boyfriend let’s call him Iggy that whole entire week. He was crying. He was missing her. Let me just say on Valentine’s Day. He said he was single and that he didn’t have a girlfriend because she got grounded and couldn’t talk to him so me and my other friend we were like on FT with him, and we were trying to get a spirits up by playing with other filters on there apparently he didn’t like the Valentines ones. I kept telling us to change it. It was whatever we did anyway, and it was messed up then right after that it was a Friday I decided to text. Laya and I was telling her that your boyfriend was saying he was single and then also the same day Zara was dating Ella and let me tell you the whole entire week. Ella was talking to laya’s bf iggy while Ella was in a whole ass relationship with one of my friends Zara so when I told both of them that Ella and Iggy were talking nonstop, calling FaceTime in texting each other on Snapchat and on phone numbers and then come to find out that those two were dating while being a whole ass relationship with two other people the other two people are laya and Zara so those too were broken, they were crying. I was trying to cheer them up when it got to but like, why would you do that to your significant other so that was my question I kept questioning why I was still friends with her, but at the same time I was just trying to keep the peace between our families. She tried to call the police on me or at least threaten me, saying if I didn’t return her switch, she called the cops on me even though she left my house at a sleepover thing. She got fucking bonkers like Billy and Ellis are no longer friends like they were hitting each other, but they were trying to get along, but it didn’t work out because I decided to be a whole ass bitch to him and not be friends and it was wild because I didn’t know so me and Billy started dating again in April and I guess Ella didn’t like how much I was talking about but she can talk about relationships though so it was random or decided to contact with each other because she was very toxic she wasn’t mature enough to handle relationship because all she ever did was cheat on every significant other she had and what was crazy is she had a app called wizz on there talking to guys WHO ARE OLDER THEN HER and now she’s dating a guy who is retarded as hell if I’m being honest like he’s a type of person that you don’t want anyone hanging around with because he kept lying about his age and then there was like a whole lot of shit with him and I just didn’t like him but like shit put me through has made me question my life choices, man like cheating on others with someone then also had the audacity to threaten my mom multiple occasions texting her late at night while she’s trying to sleep then going bad shit crazy when I called off the friendship multiple times damn well thinking you were going to change your fucking self because what you were doing was not healthy. It was toxic as hell then call me a toxic bitch who deserves no fucking life or some shit like that idk but like it’s crazy how I had to spend my high school years, trying to help her with her mental health and try to help her out anyway I can but in return I just get no help back like it was like one side of friendship I guess but the reason why I was friends with the 14 year year-old even though I’m 18 because I’m the only older kid living on our stree and she doesn’t have any of her friends living near her except me and she doesn’t have any of her friends living near her except me and most of her friends don’t talk to her and yeah everything in the span of 2021 to 2024 with was wild and not drama free.

I was 6 when the Plainfield tornado hit my neighborhood. We were the first subdivision hit when it entered Plainfield. It was weird bc half the subdivision was gone and the other half was still standing. It also hit a pig farm at the end of the street and there were dead pigs everywhere. The ones who weren’t dead made awful noises and people went around performing mercy killings.
Right before it hit I was outside with a friend. We just happened to decide to go inside our perspective houses before it hit 10 mins later. I remember thinking the clouds looked weird and now I realize they were mammatus clouds. I went inside to turn on the tv, Ghost Busters were on at 3. The tv wouldn’t turn on but the power was still on. My mom was on the phone, my dad was sleeping and my brother was getting ready to go deliver his papers for his route.
It got really dark outside and the wind and rain picked up, throwing things off our deck. My dad came tearing out of his room, yelling we needed to get downstairs and into the bathroom. My mom decided to continue her phone conversation downstairs until about the tornado hit saying “girl, I gotta go, there’s a tornado”. My family and I hid in the bathroom, all of them piled up on me. At one point I could feel the wind pulling all of us out of the bathroom, my dad holding onto the toilet seat while being pulled in the air. I don’t remember it sounding like a freight train, it was just very loud and our house was being torn apart. After it hit we went to our neighbor’s whose house was still standing. We had to peel the garage door up to escape, the top half of the house and all the stairs were gone. Our neighbor’s son happened to have one of the first cell phones and my parents were able to make a few calls to our relatives a few towns over.
I remember seeing the tornado, it was massive, black and looked like it had mini tornadoes swirling around it.
My dad had left to go help with the neighbors. A woman behind us was watching her grandson and she couldn’t get to him bc the stairs were gone. The grandson happened to be on a bed and a wall collapsed on him. Because he was on the bed, it was able to indent enough, he didn’t get crushed. Fiberglass was in his throat and my dad was able to get it out to help him breathe again. Then, the farmer down the street had his tractor roll onto him. My dad and some neighbors helped pull it off of him. He didn’t make it in time to get to his storm shelter. We had no warnings.
Around the neighborhood trees were stripped, cars in and on trees. Glass and fiberglass everywhere. All of our belongings were gone. We couldn’t even save clothing bc fiberglass was just embedded in everything. They found my dad’s savings bonds miles away. Our cats got blown away too, still lived, but were miles from home.
We had to evacuate to the end of the street bc of gas leaks.
My brother and I were supposed to start school the next day. Him at the high school and me at the Catholic school that was destroyed.
My aunts and uncles spent over 3 hours traveling to us from towns 45 mins away. We stayed with them a week before being set in a temporary home. Our house was one of the first to be rebuilt. It was eerie going to the neighborhood after it hit. I went w my dad often. The National Guard was there and also my neighbor, old man, was sitting outside w a shotgun to make sure there were no looters.
I wanted to be a storm chaser for a while, but well I’m not great at math so killed that dream. Also, I still have a fear response regarding bad weather. Watching the patterns change has been fascinating and scary.

So i only finally got my first Fully-awakened Weapon+Terminus-like+Warpath with Twen a few days ago and certainly enjoying how Proto bahamut and Behemoth runs feel alot faster, though its certainly driving home the half burn out i feel on the `grind` still, even when i only do a few runs a day.
So thought it be neat to maybe see what some others might want out of the game before they feel its a `complete` game overall.
Just to start off the list here`s a few i feel it could really need, especially would of been nice day 1 of the game: -Proud mode versions of the Primal Beasts and Tayu`itar: I spammed about it multiple times already around the reddit for this game, but I`m sure many would agree that its half a pain to get multiple copies of dread-tails, sequester manes, Tayu`itar head units and Ukar units. Problem aint present with the Avia Commanders thanks to Wolf and Veil.
-Probably over-used, but a Rogue-lite mode or a `Proper bonus reward system` might be nice, maybe to replace quick quest itself: Since i seen plenty, including myself complain there`s nothing really to justify the grind one has todo even after acquiring the `base stuff` of a good sigil combination or put all the effort into fully awakened a weapon. Plus how sparse the end game feels since its just boiled down to Proto Bahamut, then Lucy and now Behemoth, which even if the latter feels way more interactive and you dont have bosses constantly spamming either cutscenes or being out of range causing forced fixed down times of no damage or SBA generation...
...Well them doing something to FIX a problematic mode that had the intention of doing multiple quests back to back for a goodie reward would of been kind of nice, especially since many games whether triple A or not seem to want to include a Rogue-lite every since stuff like Slay the spire popularized it and it fits into many genres. So just like how Dragon Quest: Infinite Strash started right off with a rogue-like for the sake of grinding levels/materials/etc. GBF: Relink could take a page from that or even how Warframe a f2p online looter-shooter made its diviri paradox into a rogue-lite gamemode of collecting buffs and getting more and more ridiculously powerful in that mode in particular.
In GBF: Relink`s case, this could simply be done where each quick quest could add a small resource & drop rate multiplier, which could probably either reset 24 hours after you did the first one or when doing a non-quick quest, and after 3 or maybe 5 quick quests it could gurantee a gold dahlia badge and give an additional chest till maybe it caps to giving 5 additional chest rewards (after say, 15 quick quests for that `24 hour period), every quick quest past that and a gold dahlia badge every quick quest. While having multi player double the rewards instead of guranting the badge and the tickets would just let you add +1 to it period, no online requirements at all so one can stop staring at 99/99 gold tickets in storage. Very least this way when the ability to play online for GBF: Relink can`t happen anymore, it would let it still work as a stand alone game.
As for how they could push it into a rogue-like mode, well, a solo only version of quick quests might be nice that maybe trade off chain bursts and link time by giving buffs as you progress that could serve as an alternative way to get dahlia badges and maybe push players to enjoy favorites more then `meta cheesies or something.` Probably be too much to ask for at this point, but if they were to suddenly take a Xenoblade chronicles 3 approach due to game popularity, i can totally see them re-rigging some content with some basic tweaks and easily adding a dozen or two dozen new kinds of buffs you get for running thru hyper scaled up versions of particular bosses and having things like movement speed buffs, break power buffs and more could even fix some issues in particular characters, make them feel awesome like most rogue-lite modes in many games do, even when the character itself is normally `bad` in the standard gameplay loop of said game.
-Quick-scrap during Transmute/marvel screen and max capacity of Vouchers when GBF:Relink team?: Deeeefinitely one of my earliest complaints because im sure even if its to match up with the cap of 30, on multiple transmutes, it would be nice while looking at the list of pulled sigils, if i could say, press Square on my PS5 controller and immediately scrap those back to vouchers, when i `exit` the results screen, like how a number of games have with similar `pulling` systems. With of course, i think it would be nice to loop around 400~ sigils per voucher cap stock instead of going back-forth every 40, even if multi-rolls cut the spam down from 39 `rolls` to only 2, even if it might of been smoother to let us have a button to just roll as many time as we have vouchers instead.
-With just to finish things up, probably a more tuned up filter system: This is more of a minor gripe but it would be nice if i could select a specific sigil effect so i can only see sigils of that specific type. Despite the fact they have icons to SLIGHTLY differ certain effects(Too bad thats not the case with all so its a dissonance design headache with that), its still a bit of an eye-sore when i could be checking 10 or more sigils of a specific category. Especially if im say, wanting to only look at my sigils with Critical hit rate to drag out a particular combination i want to optimize-match up a build without overlap issues.
Anywho, what else do you guys think the game could use, if we are guranteed further updates, even if they will be `unplanned` after 1.3.1, which as far as im aware of, outside of impossible Lucy and Sandy, is mostly just additional character improvements and transmutation Synthesis, which we still have no idea what kind of resources it will require, if it will be locked behind defeating impossible lucy first and if it will be more unreasonable by requiring something like 10 copies of a sigil with a specific effect to `allow` you to remove the secondary effect on a sigil to replace it with the one you want from the 10 copies.
Probably wont be that extreme, but its likely not gonna be as simple as Transmarvel i would think, to force people to keep having to burn vouchers for `sigil fodder` atleast...

My sister (31) and I (29) treated our mom (64) to a weekend-long Mother’s Day celebration, including the beach, her favorite show, and ending with a seafood dinner.
My mom is a loving, boisterous, and compassionate person, but she also has a history with abuse that, when she’s triggered emotionally, can come out in ugly ways. She has a habit of taking mistakes as personal attacks, and instead of forgiving or even just being frustrated and calling it a day, she will take her anger out on people who don’t deserve it.
Unfortunately, this happens with wait staff when they mess up an order or behave in a way that she considers subpar. In fact, a few years ago, we went to a separate seafood restaurant, and she rudely accused our waiter of mistreating her when her crab legs came out cold. A huge fight ensued between us afterward.
Fast forward to this past Mother’s Day, and again, my mom mentions her crab is cold. The waitress offers to take the dish and replace it with a warmer dish. But unfortunately they come back to tell us they’ve run out of crab, which only frustrates my mom further.
I can tell she’s growing more upset, so we (my sister and I) insist she orders another dish since the restaurant was willing to comp it for her, and she can at least enjoy a meal. She agrees, and at first it seems like things will be okay. But later, when our waitress gives my sister her drink and walks away from the table, my mom calls after her with a glare. She tells the waitress she wanted another martini as if the waitress was supposed to read her mind and know. When the waitress comes back with the martini and picks up the empty glass, my mom snatches the empty glass from her and pours a small dribble of the old drink into the new.
Seeing the early signs of how things went down in previous years, I told my mom that she’s being rude, and I’m discomforted by her behavior. She goes into defense mode and demands to know what she did that was so wrong. She kept saying she has a right to send food back, and I said that wasn’t the issue, it was her treatment of the waitress, and now, also, the way she was speaking to me that made me uncomfortable.
We’ve made so much progress as a family, and I didn’t want to end the night with a massive argument, so instead of further engaging, I told her one last time that it wasn’t about sending the food back, it was about her bullying behavior. If she wasn’t going to de-escalate, I would leave. She didn’t, and so I did.
I feel like the AH because she said I ruined her Mother’s Day and that we “set her up” just to crush her joy. That wasn’t at all my goal. We did so much to make her weekend special. While I’m saddened, I’m glad I left instead of arguing like it seems she wanted. Still, I feel guilty. I love my mom. I didn’t want things to end like this. AITA? Is there any advice from people who have parents like this?

I’ve been dating a spiritual narcissist and feel hopeless
I feel like I have no voice. If I ever try to speak up, he will diminish what I say, dismiss what I say, and or gas light me. The worst of it all, he had a whole secret life - another partner of 9 years. She is living in Belize. He doesn’t take any accountability or responsibility for cheating or lying. He doesn’t see it this way. We have been together almost a year. I feel trapped. I’m out here on a ranch with him, and I’m on the other side of it crying. I just want to get back home. I want to get all of my things and go… he is just awful. I asked him for help with something so I could get a credit line, and he told me that absolutely I shouldn’t have any credit line. I said what about emergencies? I have no money… he told me well how will you pay it every month. I said it was only 500 credit line, I don’t think it will be that big of a deal, except for that I’m in the middle of no where with him so for now dependent on him… no car of my own. He even asked why I wanted one.. if it was so I can leave him? Ugh. Moments after his telling me how I shouldn’t even have a dollar basically, he starts dancing and bragging how he made 12k in the stock market with his trade and am I so happy for him…. 😒 He also is annoyed if I ask him to drive me and my things back to Houston. The ranch is an hour away. Nights like tonight, after all of the put downs and insults… Criticism about everything I do, how I picked up a dish, how I didn’t let the fish defrost long enough, how much better he would have done things… I feel like I can walk away. Ugh. This is the first narcissist I have ever met.
Also today, I had to listen for the one millionth time about how he has special knowledge that no one else does and he notices it when he’s around others. That he doesn’t feel like he can really find people who are as enlightened as him and …prob he needs to be a teacher and lots of people will follow him bc he has assendend so high. He will brag and go on and on while I clean up the kitchen from dinner, he won’t help. He will watch for me to mess up so he can pause his bragging and criticize how I breath or something. He is always repeating the same scripts… and he likes to talk about from the second he wakes up… how in 5th grade he was the smartest, the teachers All knew…how he this or that…. he said that I wouldn’t have been on his level at kindergarten age.. or he will say things like… what movie do you like? Then I say, and he says that’s a movie with little character development, I haven’t entertained those types since middle school.. or he will play one of his spiritual lectures and at the end say, that was too deep for you to understand. Wtf. It’s like all day, things like this.
And I’m heartbroken that he has this other girl. He told me she’s his stability and so he will stay with her and I’m allowed to be the mistress and publicly the assistant. She is coming back to the US.
I just hate him. I want to leave rn and somehow have him erased from my memory so I won’t cry over this. Ugh. I feel trapped.
Once I leave, I am worried about how much this is going to hurt. Just all of it…. Has anyone dealt with a narcissist? Was it hard to let go? 😒

I've read enough here in 1/2 hour to know that the mods are off drooling somewhere, so I'll make a controversial piece.
The game is stacked against you. You can buy your way into a stronger account in two hours than any free player could possibly achieve since the game came out. For that, I say eat my turds, ALL of evony devs. Have some integrity and go work somewhere else. You're either a coward, or only just talented enough to stay on staff with a janky, dollar store performing game. I still thrive with all your glitches and scumbaggery.
Moving on.
There are good servers, there are bad servers. The way the game is set up now, unless someone you know gives you an alt on an existing server, you're going to have to find out over time. You will hear people say the social aspect of the game is dead. There are 1600+ servers as of today... if you believe they know what all of them are like, then DM your social security number and I will transfer all of my Nigerian Prince money to you.
My server is awesome, has been around for 8 months, and everyone is supportive and helpful. 200+ daily active humans from across the world. Now I am supportive and helpful. I just got a f2p110M person in my alliance their wings during the special svs event, and I don't even speak the same language as him.
I work from home, and have a lot of opportunity to join "rallies" and participate in events that are profitable, so my experience in growth will not be the same as yours. That being said, if you learn the mechanics of the game and choose to specialize early on, you can be a terror. It will take months, at least, if you don't spend though.
There is a specific path for free players who have pvp in mind. If you deviate from that, you will have a bad time. This information is not hard to find. If you know what reddit is, then you know what google and youtube is.
When someone says "I played for 3 years and was engaged in my hobby and made real life friends but also I hate this game" tell them to suck your farts. That's either three years of fun, or they played for three years and didn't enjoy it at all, which makes them a moron. Suck my farts wheels, or whatever you name was.
I expect to be banned from this post, but if anyone is able to read, last svs was a blast. We have a "whale" who has all the new generals ascended. Well, "new" is relative. Napoleon, Agrippa, Suchet, and Muyo or whatever the siege lady is. Not my wheel house so I don't know. He was away for weekend for mothers day, and only a few small coiners were active and we crushed a server 150+ older than ours.
It was great. I have a good archer march, the guy I helped get wings had a good ground march, and a 2.5B coiner was there to help with a mounted. We kept harrasing temples and swapping in and out.
You can have a lot of fun without spending a dime, but it will take time. Join the strongest alliance, and if you don't like it in a few days, start a new account. Rinse and repeat. If you don't like my post, suck my farts, then exhale, then rinse and repeat. If you're going to say well what about Chalons, and what about future.. blah blah blah. I spent like $150 bucks and it was well worth it so far. Eat my farts.

https://voca.ro/1ShbPHVjjoF9 - Voice clip
I've been a nerd since I can remember and never felt like I quite fit in. I played sports, I watched anime, I played computer games, table top games and I still do. I struggled with my mental health growing up and am happy to say I'm in a good place now. I live in a beautiful city and I don't have any toxic people in my life. Turns out when you do that you're not left with many people, including a family which I am at peace with. I struggle to connect with people who haven't had to overcome their own demons, or I have nothing in common with.
I have a good career and I think I'm about to shake it up with the experience I now have under my belt. Moving out of Canada might be in the cards. I have too many hobbies/interests. some I've already alluded to, but others include boxing (doing), mma (watching), singing, building/painting models (Something I've gotten back into lately) and competitive card games (I just got back from tournaments in LA, Ottawa and Vancouver). My PC games of choice lately are League, TFT and Pokemon Showdown if that counts.
What are we supposed to write in these posts? I feel like I'm barely scratching the surface of who I am. I try to stay relatively active with a personal trainer I see 2-3 times a week but my chaotic mind and inner fat kid keep me with what I can only describe as a "healthy" dadbod with muscles. Food is my vice and I love going out to eat or pounding back dairy-free ice cream. l wear glasses, don't have wrinkles and rock a ghostly pale skin tone. I have a minor sun allergy so I tend to avoid it. I embrace the vampire meming people in my life throw at me, many Twilight references have been made at my expense.

https://www.midwesterndoctor.com/p/dissecting-the-new-york-times-plea
"Story at a Glance:
•Repeatedly forcing the public (e.g., through mandates) to use unsafe and ineffective therapies (that injured millions) has created a public relations disaster for the establishment.
• Various attempts have been made to do the impossible—restore the public’s trust in our medical institutions without any of them admitting fault.
• Here, I review each of the previous attempts and how they were used to create the recent infamous article by the NYT—which while monumental for bringing attention to the COVID vaccine-injured, also repeats a variety of strategic and very harmful lies to protect the vaccine industry.
• One of the mysteries of the COVID-19 response is what could have possibly justified breaking the public’s trust in the medical institutions our society revolves around. Here I will review the most compelling explanations we’ve come across after three years of investigating this commonly asked question."
....
"Before we go any further, I'd like to focus on its title, which sadly synopsizes the entire NYT article:
Note: thousands is a very clever word to use here, since if 999,900 people were permanently disabled by the vaccine, it would still be “true” but it implies a far smaller number.
When the word “believe” is used, it can have a few different meanings. For example it could be used:
• When you think something is true but don’t have the ability to back it up (e.g., I frequently use “believe” here because I think it is important to note the claims I am making that I cannot provide strong evidence for).
• To characterize something someone thinks is true an irrational belief that only exists in their head (e.g., a common way medicine gaslights patients ds by arguing the symptoms they experienced from a pharmaceutical injury are actually just “in their head”).
• When you want to acknowledge someone’s feelings to make it seem like you are doing something but divorce the discussion from any factual or substantiative grounding (something which sadly is quite common in the modern left).
In turn, I would argue the NYT was not using “believe” in the way I believe is appropriate to do and instead doing the latter two. Thus, like all good propagandists, they are attempting to find a way to twist the situation so that they can have their cake and eat it. Similarly, if you consider the other underlined phrase, it’s clear someone spent a lot of time trying to figure out how to write something that sounded like an acceptable admission and apology to those injured by the vaccines but simultaneously suggested that those injuries aren’t really a thing and there is nothing to be concerned about with the vaccine."

I would like to start off by saying I might become a team lead soon. Yes I know these are big goals for someone who is just a team lead, but I like to set my sights high. If that happens, or even if not, I would like to make my mark by making night shift run more smoothly/make it more bearable for the higher leads and team members as well.
What is the problem?

• I have noticed that day shift goes about as well as can be expected, considering everyone must be good at their jobs or else we’ll sink and metaphorically drown. However, my qualm with night shift’s inefficiency might lend a hand to improving the rest as well.
• The problem with night shift, or so I assume, is that the staff is mostly highschool kids who (probably) don’t have to pay rent & have been drained from school prior to clocking in. Most of the time, as our store’s location is located in a very busy area (made $12.4m last year) centered near many other businesses and schools— we get SLAMMED with no hopes of running the shift efficiently. There’s the school rush, dinner rush, and pre-close rush…and sometimes they all blend together too.
• Some resulting issues include:
  • Dining room being a mess because there’s only one person and it gets crazy busy at night; but we get comparable rushes in the day and people often manage DR by themselves. This goes back to general cleanliness within the whole restaurant.
  • People forgetting to stock their own areas/walking away without readying themselves/others for the next rush. This makes it far harder for the main stocker to handle their job, and they are already typically someone who is not acclimated to stocking since common stockers call out/have things come up that night. Must we train people on stocking more?
  • Order accuracy, and again why is this a far more common issue at night rather than day? We have several replacement orders made at night so there is plenty to be fixed.
• I’m unsure if the main issue is pre-existing fatigue, supremely how busy we are, or just plain apathy by most of the staff. Would it be wrong to assume that? :0

Why is it my goal?

• Ultimately my goal is to lessen the mental/physical workload on the team as a whole, but hopefully for other leads too because that will result in better team treatment/management.
• If we’re talking results that look good for me/the store as a whole (I GUESS😹)— a generally smoother night shift could lead to shorter wait times which would equate to more sales since more customers would be inclined to stop by due to speedy service.
• If I had to consolidate my overall goals into three core values, Chick-Fil-A’s winning heart strategy says it best:
  • Clean & Safe Environment
  • Fast & Accurate Service
  • Genuine Hospitality

Some Ideas

• I could assign a position where a particularly skilled person floats between dining room and a secondary sticking position.
• Assign leaders to specific parts of the restaurant each night.
  • I.e. “Jeff” would be in charge of iPads, which means he’s having the other fellas sequence the cars correctly (we have a two lane DT which merges into one line, yes it’s difficult). So on and so forth for Front Counter and the Drive Thru interior.

What I’m asking of you guys is, how can I reach this goal? What are some things you do in your store to make things run more smoothly in general, not even just at night? Are there some things about my restaurant you’re curious about that could help you answer my request?

For context, I (24m) purchase a 3 bed 1 bathroom home with an unfinished basement in St Louis, MO. I wanted to give my friends (all 24m) a head start since we are all starting our professional lives.
Two roommates rent the remaining upstairs bedrooms for 375$ and the roommate in question rents a “room” in the basement for 200$. Utilities are included in the rent and work out to approximately 110$ per person.
The room in the basement is made up of two concrete walls, the stairs with a closet built in, and painters blanket hung up for privacy from the remainder of the basement (which is only used for storage/laundry). The room is the same size as the upstairs bedroom but is directly below the kitchen. I also provided a bed, desk, and plastic storage for him which is also included in his rent.
Basement roommate believes his rent is not fair and requested I lower the price to accommodate for it being loud when people walk and talk upstairs. We are all usually in bed by 11 with the occasional trip to the bathroom and are not throwing parties on the weekends. We also try to be cognizant of running the laundry too late in the evening and always telling him he can turn it off if it’s ever too loud when he wants to sleep. When asked what would be fair he said 140$.
I hope I caught all of his nuisances that he told me about but I may have missed something. AITA?
TLDR: 24M roommate wants 200$ rent reduced due to noise in the basement.

This girl and I (22F) go way back and were once quite close. We have become more distant from each other as I myself distanced myself a bit after I went through something. We had a rocky time in our friendship and then I left for a 4-5 month internship in another city.
During that time, I noticed she reconnected with people who I have a bad history with. It was quite surprising to me but I didn’t hold it against her. They took a really fun trip together around the time of my birthday which is why I think she sent an especially sweet message for my birthday. I responded saying I miss her. We didn’t talk again for like three months. At the end of my internship I badly needed a female friend to vent to about someone at my internship I developed a crush on.
I reached out over text asking about her family vacation and told her I wanted to reconnect. She seemed willing to. I then told her I really need a female friend to vent to about a boy and so I did. She seemed receptive but also a bit distant as she never experienced a crush before and it seemed like a sore point. She cut the convo saying she needed to go as it’s her dad’s birthday but said “I’m happy to catch up” and then we just never talked about it again and she didn’t reach out.
I’m back in school and we haven’t made a move to reconnect despite living a block away from each other. I feel angry but also don’t know if I’m justified. The whole thing feels so off and I feel like such a fool. I let her in on private stuff and I’m kinda hurt

Local 11 is heading into elections. Our local fb pages have turned into a circus. We have a group that is made up of mostly 20-50yr jw’s. I think 1 person is under 20yrs. They spend a large portion of the time boosting about said years and going on and on about solidarity with no real discussions about what there plans are to make our local better. Many have asked for more info. Plans or things they want to see changed in detail. They get no answer or an answer that doesn’t say much. They claim they don’t want others to “ steal “ there ideas. Honestly who cares who’s idea it is if it works. But anyways. I have spent my time on there fb pages silent just watching. Mostly coz everyone that backs this group gangster up and bashed anyone who doesn’t support them. As member watching this slate comment on a post bashing people and turning around and talking about brotherhood. Has me in disbelief. How is anyone possibly taking them seriously. Our local already has so many issues. A BM that can’t be transparent or honest is not something we need.

For context, I choose who I befriend. When I know na ginagamit lang ako and ayaw ko sa tao in general, I will not, in any form, try to befriend you. I’ve made a similar post to this on this page, pero I deleted it.
First day of school, orientation, may tumabi sa ‘kin na blockmate ko. I do not know who she is, where she lives, or what her personality is. She tried to converse with me and since orientation pa lang, I was trying to keep my options plenty so I responded sa kaniya thinking she could be a reliable friend in the future. We found out throughout our conversation that we lived in the same city so even though hindi ko naman sinuggest dahil hindi pa ako comfortable sa kaniya, she insisted na sasabay siya sa ‘kin umuwi. Mind you, I told her that I will meet some friends pa and we will eat out but, she insisted pa rin and ate with us. Ever since then, she never failed on clinging onto me. Sa room, lagi niya akong tinatabihan. Sa groupings, laging gusto niya kasama ko siya. Sa by partner na activities, she wants us to be partners. And you may ask, bakit ito problema? It’s because I do not like her. I have no choice lang because I do not want to be rude and shoo her away. First day of class, hindi na ako nilayuan. Some of my friends thinks I’m friends with her kasi nakadikit sa ‘kin lagi. It would’ve been okay naman if she isn’t abusing my kindness. Ang kaso, she’s getting too comfortable.
One time, I met her parents and found out na she’s somehow different. Someone who used to go rin from the same highschool as hers told me that she’s socially awkward because she had been bullied and only had boys as friends. She was isolated from the rest which made her unaware of basic sensitivity. She’d curse my friends when we’re walking side to side pauwi. And would say “Send mo sagot mo __” which for me is quite demanding. I also remember she failed a minor and kept bugging me to answer her test para pumasa siya sa subject niya (I helped her pass). And during our RetDems, she’ll always perform last kasi nahihirapan siya magkabisado. She’d ask me to help her and when I don’t, there’s a sense of guilt kapag tinitingnan niya ako and some of our blockmates would also join in by asking, “Hindi pa siya tapos? E ikaw? Parang nahihirapan si __.” So ayon, may sense of obligation akong nafifeel kaya I can’t say it to her face na ayaw kong dumidikit siya sa ‘kin.
And ever since I found out about her situation, I tried to broaden my perspective na lang. I posted this before and some said I should get straight to the point but, I couldn’t do that. So recently, I’ve been trying a different approach.
Before, I had no choice and no guts to speak out that I do not want to be her RetDem partner. I remember that while our prof’s giving instructions kasi, she’d already perform those assessments and procedures sa ‘kin. Medyo uncomfy nga since bigla-bigla na lang siya humahawak sa balat ko. I’m trying to ignore her na lang as a hint that I don’t want to be her partner since I’m not good with words. Lumalapit na lang ako sa kaibigan ko para malayuan ko siya. But sadly, she can’t pick up social cues talaga.
Nitong mga nakaraan, nasimulan kong magtaray when I noticed she’s starting to get more comfortable.
The first time it happened, bigla niyang hinampas bun ko ng fan niya. As a nursing student na gumigising ng maaga para plakado ang buhok, nainis ako ng sobra kaya medyo na-raise ko boses ko and said, “‘Wag mong ganiyanin” (wasn’t too loud pero enough for people nearby to hear). Which earned a few laughs from close friends and bigla siya dumukdok sa lamesa niya. Second time, nanonood ako sa naunang mag-RetDem when she again, hit me but this time with a bottle on my head (kinunutan ko lang ng noo and she just laughed at me). And many more in which she’ll use different things para paluin ako kung saan-saan. May it be rolled up papers, bottle, fan, pencil, papaluin niya ako basically anywhere she thinks is funny. Last time it happened which was our last meeting, pinapalo-palo niya bun ko habang nagbabasa ako and natarayan ko ulit siya by saying na “hindi ka na nakakatuwa”. She stopped right away and was quite on the way home. I just don’t understand kung ano mahirap intindihin sa ilang beses kong paalala na ‘wag siyang nanghahampas. Maiintindihan ko sana kung during biruan pero ang kaso, hindi naman ako nakikipagbiruan sa kaniya and these happens during times talaga na focused ako on something. I stayed quiet when she used me for activities pero, itong pahampas-hampas niya, I really can’t stand. Para kasing nananadya siya kasi what else could be her reason?
So, ABYG if I do not like her actions kaya natatarayan ko siya? ABYG if napapahiya siya sometimes although, hindi ko naman intention? Sa tingin ko kasi GG ako for not putting up with her.