Unblocker at school

For some context me (27f) and my ex (28m) split up 2 years ago, we were together for 5 years and met at school, both mine and his best friends are also a couple and have been together for 10 years now. When things ended we promised to stay friends for the sake of not changing things in our friendship group, as we are all very good friends and have been before we were in couples, and we also agreed to keep any new relationships out of this particular friendship group so no one feels they are being replaced (as we did a lot of things as couples)
Both me and my ex have been seeing other people for over a year now, and are both happy. However our best friends wedding is now coming up, and my ex is the best man, and me my friends maid of honor (and we’re both responsible for organising the stags and hen do). I do not have a problem with my ex’s girlfriend, but even though we have never spoken she has blocked me on everything, and I have noticed her blocking and unblocking me a couple times (I’m assuming to snoop) I have tried to reach out to her but she doesn’t seem interested - she knows his best friend from work, but they have never hung out outside of work and she has never met my best friend.
She hasn’t been officially invited to their wedding, but being with my ex being the best man and knowing his friend it’s assumed she is. I know that is may seem unreasonable but I feel very uncomfortable with her being at my friends wedding and asked my ex if it would be okay for her not to attend, I’m not bringing my partner as I know almost all of the people that will be at the wedding, and I want to be able to socialise and help my friend with anything she needs, without having to worry about introducing my partner and him not knowing anyone, which would be the same situation with my exes new partner.
I don’t want to bring this up to my best friend as it’s her wedding and I shouldn’t have a say as to who she invites and I don’t want to make anything awkward for her, so I only mentioned it to my ex, I do feel like I’m being a little unfair, and if it was the case of her being good friends with our friends it would be different, but I’ve known these people for a long time and she doesn’t know at all, but I have been talking about this wedding with my best friend for 10 years, and I really don’t want to spend the day having to put on a happy face for a girl that doesn’t like me, or having to avoid her completely as I want to really enjoy myself and see everyone, i’ve been looking forward to this for years.

Before I start this, I just want to answer some question I know I’ll probably have to answer later, or share some information that might be important.

1. I have gone no contact with him. (He tries to bait me into talking to him.) Only my friend group knows about the alcohol.
   
2. I know for a fact he drinks, I was with him once when he did it.
   
3. It’s not his parent’s fault, he sneaks it from open vodka bottles in their refrigerator.
   
4. I know he is drinking while underage, I plan to report him to the school counselor if he doesn’t seek help.
   
5. We’re both gay, though I do not like him like that in any way shape or form. He swears up and down he doesn’t like me like that either, but take that how you will.
   
6. He has allegedly been drinking since he was 7. I can neither confirm nor deny this.
   
7. He blames all of his problems on the alcohol.
   

I, 16m, was friends with another boy, 15m, for roughly 4 years. We used to call each other every day to play games. Every single day for 4 years. Everything was fine until I started hanging out with our other (mutual) friends.
After I started hanging out with other people, he began to get very jealous and bitter towards me and the friend I was talking to. He would act annoyed and upset whenever I would do things with my other friends, even though it’s the same things I would do with him. This is when the arguing began. He would make snarky comments toward me indirectly through his bio on either a game we play together or the app we use to text and call. He would always deny that it is about me, even if it was blatantly obvious. (For example, I used to give myself nicknames on the game we play together. He combined the starting letter of the 3 I've used and said something along the lines of “ABC gave me everything but real love.”)
We would argue like this and he would come to school like nothing happened and act friendly towards me, even if it was obvious that I didn’t want to act friendly with him. He would also frequently block me for absolutely no reason, and unblock me after a few hours. If I asked for a reason, he would get mad and change the subject. Of course, I got tired of this and blocked him back one day. To nobody’s surprise, the next day at school he was talking to me and making jokes like absolutely nothing happened.
One day, he even decided it would be a great idea to ignore me while I was sitting right next to him. I would talk to him, wave my hand in front of him to get his attention, and even tap his shoulder. No response. I obviously got fed up with him and let my friends know in a group chat that he isn’t in what was going on incase they were curious why either of us were annoyed. (This wasn't the best idea, I know, however he gets mad when I hang out or talk to them differently than I do with him so the most logical thing to do was to not let him know when I hang out or text with them.)
Before this next part, I have to go back a little bit. Because we would play games together, we would log into each other’s account to farm or grind for something the other wants. This lead to him knowing my password and email. Since he saw me typing on my phone, he saw the group chat that doesn’t have him in it. He took that as a sign that I was talking shit about him to our friends (I truly was not.) and decided to try and hack my account. Luckily, I’ve always used a secondary email on the games we play, so he only got my old account.
Not knowing that this happened, I forgave him for everything that he did prior. A few days later, at the end of school before I left, we were talking when he said the name of my secondary account. Of course, I asked how he knew about it, and he said he logged in. I obviously got very angry at him for this, as I had not given him permission whatsoever. I told him I would have showed him my messages had he just simply asked. This caused him to get angry at me for being angry at him. (He also got angry at me when he got the notifications that he had been removed from my email. I also changed my passwords, have no fear.)
After discussing this with our mutual friends, they confirmed that what he did was not okay. Because I was getting more distant from him, he thought that he should buddy up to someone else in our friend group. (He barely speaks to anyone else if he doesn’t have to.) Of course, he chose the one person that he supposedly hates based on past events. (Not my story to share, I apologize.)
(I don’t remember this part all too well so take it with a grain of salt.) After a while, I decided to give him another chance. We had a conversation where I brought up all of the issues I had with him in a few paragraphs. (Mainly stuff about boundaries and respecting me. Also for pulling my hair whenever he got the chance even though I told him multiple times on multiple occasions to stop.) His response was changing the subject to something different, and about me. I promptly him shut down, however, as he was bringing up stuff that I didn’t do, insisting that he at least acknowledges his problems instead of pretending everything is fine. This ultimately lead to him getting angry and ending the conversation with his signature “Okay. Bye.”
He then went back to pretending everything was normal with me, though he was talking shit about me in a group chat with our mutual online friends and one of our real life friends (The one he hated that I mentioned previously.) She would tell me everything he said about me, but she didn’t want to get involved so I couldn’t call him out for any of it. At this point, I was just tired of fighting, so I went with it. Many more minor arguments happened after this. I won’t include details for the sake of this post not being too unbearably long, since what happened was basically the previous fight over and over.
A while later, one of our friends called him out for his shit, as I had been letting them know what was going on for every argument we had. He got really heated over this, and told her to kill herself and that he never valued her as a friend. She gave no shits at all. He was promptly removed, or left on his own, from all of the group chats with her in them except our main server. They had each other blocked, though to nobody’s surprise that didn’t stop him from talking about her or to her in the server.
Though 2 out of 5 people in our friend group wanted nothing to do with him, that didn’t stop him from sitting with us and trying to joke around with us like nothing happened. For a while, everything was fine. I wasn’t talking to him, he wasn’t talking to me. Another fight happened between him and the friend he hated before, but that isn’t my story to tell either, sorry. The only thing I can say about the fight is that he mentioned his alcohol addiction.
One thing lead to another and I decided to give him one last chance. Again. So, I had another conversation with him, letting him know that im serious about unfriending him if he doesn’t talk to his therapist about the alcohol, jealousy, and obsession with me.
I gave him until the end of the week to talk to his therapist, or I’m gone. Everything was fine until the weekend. I went on a trip to Dollywood on the weekend, 4 of my friends being there. He of course did not come on the trip, as he isn’t in the school club that took us. I asked him on Sunday if he had talked to his therapist about anything yet, and he had said no. I rightfully blocked him, just as I said I would. He proceeded to play the victim and started asking our friends what he did wrong, pretending that I hadn’t told him anything about blocking him.
I unblocked him momentarily to send a message on why I did it. I told him blatantly that if he didn’t talk to his therapist I would block him, and he did not. I may have been a little harsh with my words, but keep in mind that I have given him many chances to grow and learn from his mistakes that he has not taken. He needs help, and I can’t help him. I wished him the best, but told him that the best is not something I am capable of giving him.
After I blocked him again, he edited one of his messages to “call me out” for not doing what he wanted. He claims that I should’ve just listened to his issues and tell him everything was fine instead of letting him know that what he’s doing is wrong. He doesn’t want help, he wants someone to ignore his problems. I told him that im not that person and im tired of pretending I am. He proceeded to make his bio things along the lines of “You never actually loved me” once more.
After his numerous attempts at getting me to talk to him by making his bio about me, I got fed up. I confronted him, letting him know that I don’t want to be friends with him, I don’t want anything to do with him, and that he needs to stop talking about me in his bio. He of course pretended his issues didn’t exist, instead telling me that he would get help for real this time. I let him know that he just admitted to not trying to get help the first time, and that in lying to me, he broke my trust in him.
Because I knew he wouldn’t try to get help, I blocked him after saying goodbye once more. This is when he started openly shit talking me and the friend that called him out one single time. He changed his bio to things about my body he knew I was insecure about, such as my forehead. While I admit that this wasn’t the best thing to do, I gave him a taste of his own medicine. He’s a bigger individual, and he’s told me that he’s insecure about his weight.
Again, I apologize for what I said to him, I was angry when I said it. He said I have a sixhead, so I retaliated with seventeen stomach and that he can’t be talking about me when he looks 5 years pregnant. I mean no hate to pregnant people, I was angry at him when I said it. I do not condone rudeness towards plus sized or pregnant individuals. Back to the story.
He made a post on a platform we all use about how he hates Taylor Swift fans, especially the blonde ones. (Ironic when he was talking about how he liked her a while ago. Also, the friend that called him out is blonde and a big Taylor Swift fan.) So, in retaliation, our other, OTHER friend commented the username to his twitter account where he actively reposts nsfw images of gay furries, often depicted as children. I was the only person that knew about it, since he reposted such images and showed them to me in class, to my discomfort. I am usually not one to air out dirty laundry like that, however he had done something similar to me a while back, and I honestly didn’t care how it would make him feel.
I took another page out of his book and edited my message since we had each other blocked, telling him to stop shit talking me in his bio, and that I wanted nothing to do with him. Since that happened, he hasn’t made his bio anything about me, instead changing it to some joke about being 5 years pregnant.
Nobody has told me that what I’ve done was wrong, I just would like to make sure that I’m not in the wrong here. Any thoughts would be appreciated.

Okay so first things first i'm going to confess- i was the one who fucked up. this entire situation is my fault.
I met a girl at school through mutual friends, we'll call her Av for her privacy. I didn't like her originally, but i started to develop a small crush over time. After a couple months i asked her on a date and she said yes. Av is the first person in a relationship with me to have treated me well, and i loved her so much.
Then about a month ago, i had got home from a camping trip with a few of my buds and i was really tired. Like REALLY tired, running on about an hours sleep for three days. I saw one of my female friends (Who is a lesbian) who I hadn't seen in a while, and i gave her a big hug as she said hi. Right as Av walked in. She seemed fine with it at first but started questioning me about it later after school. she asked me maybe 4 or 5 times if i liked her (Av didn't know the girl was a lesbian) and eventually i snapped and had a bit of a go at her. after a bit of silence she texted this:
"Do you think that the two of us are a good idea?"
That sort of shocked me for a bit as i realised what i had actually said to her. I cried that night.
The next day i tried to make it up to her but got told to leave her alone for a bit. Then she called me and we argued over the phone for a couple hours until she hung up and blocked me on everything. A few days later another person told me Av had apparently (If you'll excuse the british slag) Slagged me off (Insulted me) on a group chat with a few other mutuals but i didn't know how much she had done it. i asked for her to unblock me and then i confronted her. And boy did i fuck up. She had barely even talked about me and when she did she was just saying that it didn't end to well. and yet i confronted her like she had committed a crime of some sort against huanity. I made her cry, as i was told afterwards. I hate myself for that.
She hasn't spoken to me irl since, and barely over text. My best mate noticed that i was feeling like shit and asked her about it. she said something along the lines of: "I never said he couldn't talk to me, he just avoids me. There are other people to be around." I miss her so much. I just want her back so bad.

Okay I need advice…To start off with this story. I graduated high school last year and as soon as I turned 18 I got on Seeking. Honestly I don’t come from money and I was headed to college soon my dads a single dad so I decided to find a way to pay for school. It wasn’t my best idea but I did it. I also was a virgin at the time and had a lot of guys texting me. I was going to meet this other guy the day I met my now current boyfriend/sugar daddy. But the other guy ended up getting drunk so I met up with my now bf. Our age gap is pretty big I was a month into being 18 and he was 48. We met up at this hotel in my town and as soon as I got there I regretted it. He was friendly and I was very shy around him. Right after we had sex I went to the restroom and made up something about how my dad was asking where I was at it was like two am. I left the room and went to my car and cried I felt so ashamed that I could do something like that. As soon as I got home I showered and blocked him on everything. A week goes by and I tell one of my good friends and we went to Walgreens to get a plan b just to be safe. I realized soon after that I kind of enjoyed it in a way so I unblocked him and we met up again. When he first messaged me he was offering $750 a week but he only would give me $500 max. I was a little annoyed but naive. I quickly realized he wanted a relationship out of this whereas I wanted a sugar daddy only. I’m in college and I have no time for a relationship. I also had never been in a serious relationship so I became very attached to him. I would rant about past ex bfs and how I would miss them and I guess he got annoyed and started it doing it back to me. In the beginning I only saw him as a sugar daddy so I would post pictures of myself in bikinis and he would get mad at me but I wouldn’t care because he didn’t mean anything to me at the time. After a while I slowly fell in love with him I was shooked because he was old and I was young. Around this time one my siblings were getting skeptical about how I was getting money when I bark worked and went to school. She soon found out and outed me to my whole family. For a week straight my family would call me all sorts of names and that was definitely a low point for me. I was feeling really bad at the time and wanted to run away with him. I later found out he was watching porn behind my back and I felt so mad and sad at the same time. How could he have me and watch those things I thought. He swore to me that he would not do it again and he watched it when he was younger so I guess he kind of got addicted to it in a way. I forgave him and we went on with our relationship. We’ve since been together for almost a year. About two months ago I saw him in many girls likes and follows. They would post there body’s and everything. Not shaming that because I used to do that I was upset with my bf because he would get mad at me and call me insecure when I would do it but liked pictures of other girls doing it. I confronted him about it and he said he was sorry and that he wouldn’t do it again. Fast forward to last week I was hanging out with him and I kept checking my phone thinking my dad was going to call because I sneaked out to see him. My bf got suspicious and told me to open up my phone so I did. I showed him my messages and snap and he saw that a guy friend had sent me a streak. He was so upset and saying why I was texting another guy. I told him it was a exchange student friend I met in high school and I had a streak with him to keep in touch he was really mad and so I tried to apologize and comfort him. After he said he forgave me and then he got on his phone. Keep in mind he never lets me get on his phone. He owns his own business and he says he doesn’t want me to see his business plans as if I would know what to do with them. I went to his instagram messages and he snatches his phone after he does that I grab it from him and see he texted this girl that had her arch pic as her profile pic. She had slid up on his story and said baeee where he replied with what she said that he had tooken a long time to reply where he said a little:) with a smiley face. I was furious I had drove over and hour to see him and I got my things and I was crying hysterically. He told me he was sorry but somehow blamed it on me. He started yelling at me and saying if you think I want that whore then leave. I was like wtf you texted her back and I’m the one getting shouted at. I later forgave him but now I feel like I let it be okay for so long he’ll just do it again. I’m so in love with him and I don’t want to leave him. I would like someone different to see it in another perspective. Did he make mistakes that I should just forgive or should I just leave now?

My first cousin has been a full on active alcoholic since 2018. She would get together and drink with her group of friends every single day and then get beat up by their boyfriends. This was a normal life for her. her group are my best friends bully, ever since high school and because my best friend has no spine she would always forgive no matter how shitty they treated her.
2 years ago my best friend and I ended our friendship due to her choosing them and other shitty people over me and recently at the start of this year we managed to rekindle our friendship. however, all she would talk about is how my cousins friends would abuse and use her, ruin her car and have her drink so much so she could get beaten up by one of their bfs. She became a full blown alcoholic while I was gone in a span of 2 years and everytime I would tell her to block the girls and focus on herself she would then unblock them and try to get in contact with them. I stayed silent and knew it wasn’t even worth giving her advice since she doesn’t follow it.
Her birthday came up last month and she tried to cancel it because my cousin ended up in hospital in a coma due to alcoholism and I knew she wasn’t going to make it. A lot of people were flying over to see her so I was annoyed when I found that out and my other friend pretty much planned her whole birthday. I told her not to focus on my cousin for once and just celebrate your birthday. The mood on her birthday was down and she was not happy at all. Her friends gifted her alchol and had her taking shots which upset me a lot because I don’t want her ending up like my cousin.
Mid April I ended my friendship with my best friend because she kept lying to me about drinking and partying. Mycousin passed away late april and I really feel bad for telling my friend to not focus on my cousin being in hospital.
Thoughts on how I handled the situation? Is it wrong for me to attend my cousins funeral?
I just got back from work so the grammar is horrible sorry!

I had a crush on this teacher from Term 1; she's super sweet and everything. She goes around the school everyday asking pupils how their day was, how they are feeling, etc... She was also very sweet to me but I've been noticing some changes lately; I'm not pretty sure why but I feel like this teacher is trying to detatch herself from me. The good thing is that I'm graduating in a few weeks - I'll probably never see her again.
So first and foremost, the first thing I noticed is that she took off the keyring that I gave to her. After a trip during my vacation, I got her a keyring and she put it on her bag for about almost a month. However, a few weeks ago, she took it off.
You know how email gives you a "follow up" notification when someone doesn't read your email? Yeah. I got that notification from an email I sent to her. The email was me basically recommending some songs to her and she also recommended some songs to me. I thanked her and said that I really loved a song she recommended me. After that, there was no reply and only a "follow up" notification came.
Another day, she was supervising in the library. She talked to every single person in the library but me.
I also have been lately noticing changes in the way she speaks / greets me. I'm not saying that I would expect enthusiasm from her when she speaks or greets me - what I'm saying is that she used to be enthusiastic but now her greetings are flat.
Oh and also, she shared me her spotify playlist and hence I followed her spotify account. However, days later it said that I wasn't following her. Thus, on that day I followed her again. Yet, today, when I checked, it said that I wasn't following her again. I'm suspecting she blocked me and then unblocked me to remove me from her followers because she hasn't blocked me at the very moment. She also removed some public playlists and changed the covers of them. I'm spiralling down on this rabbit hole of what this could potentially mean.
I've lately been frantically thinking about what could've let to these changes. However I can't find an answer to it. Perhaps I shouldn't care as after a few weeks I'm never going to see her again.

(I made a same post but with the photos of texts that "she" sent to me on my account since all the communities that I want to post don't allow them)
So it's mother's Day and my mom is absent in our lives until "now". I won't go into my whole life story but tl:dr tried her best but made hard by being emotionally unstable, unavailable, and would aid it with alcohol and verbal fights. Ok the reason why we're here. I (elder sibling) got kicked out with my dad in 2021. shit got worse in early 2022 with her in financial. Kicked my second oldest sister out during that time. Mom's mom died later that year in September. Forced the rest of my younger siblings to live with us for no reason after it. Horrible funeral/week due to her shit talking, and has been absent pretty much since then. Sure my younger siblings had the visits every other week but it slowly turned into months and now going into more than half a year. During the months of no visits "she" would text my younger siblings through social media, we come from a foreign family so older family members don't have much of an English grasp (unless its my dad multilingual mf) and "her" messages got more articulated in English grammar, at first it was more noticeable with the emails between my parents with her usual simple and poor one sentences, all of sudden proper English with paragraphs. It took so time after those first emails that the text between my siblings and mom started to look the same as the emails. This may be wrong on our part but we had suspicion that someone else was texting for her, so dad found some new guy that was friends on Facebook with her and when the kids visited her they confirmed that it was the same guy living with her. Dad found the 2 ex-wives (out of 3) of his and found out he's a huge con artist that's not allowed to fly internationally (due to his arrest as a con artist, his visa is stripped.) The new boyfriends plan usually was to meet some hopeless women, have a kid and then get married, then proceeded to lie about needing money for sick family in the USA, at first he was in the USA then left to the CAD after he left his first wife. He proceeded to do that for the rest of them. Currently, he's not allowed to talk to the kids from his first and one of the kids from his third ex-wives, while he still allowed visitation rights for the other one and the one he has with his second ex-wife. You may be wondering why this was included but it's because since dad still talks to the second and third ex-wives, he's found out that mom has been seen her boytoys kids more than her own kids, since he needs a supervisor when he visits his kids. When we found out he was texting for mom, dad emailed them telling him to stop texting to the younger kids as mom or else the cops were going to get involved, he replied showing no means to stop and this had happened in December 2022-Jaurary 2023. Ever since then they stopped trying hide the fact that it was him texting as her, and slowly over time though we had blocked her on all social media platforms. Before we had blocked her though, my oldest younger sister, started texting mom telling her to leave us alone and that, us, as the kids didn't want anything to do with her anymore until she stopped the abusive cycle she's put us all in. During all of that, she was calling the same sister at random times at night which started to affect her mental health really badly and she couldn't go to school cause of it. It got worse when she randomly showed up at my her and my little brothers school doing something with their school information, mom tried saying hi and saying she missed them, which scared my sister more thinking she was going to show up again. She tried telling mom that what she was doing was affecting her really badly, they proceeded to respond in the most foolish way, "thinking" that dad was texting, when my sister was trying to be the most professional she could be in that situation. After that situation, all the siblings blocked mom on everything and mom had previous encounters on social media already, so I kept her unblocked on gmail so I could laugh at the emails she can send, like today. The first email is proof how they would respond when they though it was dad, and the second one is from today and you can see the grammatical difference between the two, which explains our suspicions and why we did what we did. By the way, the reason why we can't do anything to restrict communication between mom and my siblings is because here we have a law where only 15+ can get some sort of a restraining order against someone and the oldest sibling of the youngest is a year or 2 from being able to, and for dad, this all still going through court trials (this why 2022 was shitty to begin with) cause of that, dad's been trying co-operative while mom has been doing the complete opposite, causing the court stuff to drag on. As much as what we're doing isn't the nicest or what you would call supportive but 18+ years of neglect, harm, and deprivation has caused a lot of pain and struggle coming into adulthood and with mom doing these moments still, I feel like I'm getting dragged back into my little self. Every one of my siblings shows their hurt from her in their different ways but not gonna lie with these months of no communication with mom, I've seen my family grow into people we should've been growing up with her, I don't have my old habits like tiptoeing everytime, everyday just for talk or food, or having to blust music 24/7 into headphones because she'd always scream at anyone for doing something wrong, we joke without worrying about someone commenting negative, we can play and rough house without yelling, we can be loud without someone screaming to shut the hell up, we can do our chores whenever we can, not being screamed at to do it at this moment. There's been ups and downs with our growth but this is a lot better than being not human living with her.
This year's mother's Day hasn't been pleasant, but I do enjoy the company of my grandma's, alive and dead. Happy mother's Day.

does anyone have an unblocked proxy website that doesnt have any sorts of limits? I use the proxies available at sites.google.com/view/undergroundkids but they all have some sort of data restrictions. I want to play fnaf during school. I used to play on Yandex.com, but it got blocked because of everyone knowing about it (nobody knows how to gatekeep)

I am not The OOP, OOP is u/lolfuckno.
This post was originally posted to weddingshaming.
There was already a BoRU post by u/autochthonouschimera, which didn't include the last update yet.
TRIGGER WARNING: cheating, child neglect, extreme entitledness, talk of abortion
MOOD SPOILERS: infuriating, confusing, frustrating
The new update at the bottom of this post has been marked with --- ---
Original story was posted on December 7, 2021
Okay, so this girl I know from high school is getting married. We're both 22, for reference. In our senior year of high school she got pregnant, with baby daddy A who will be referred to as Adam. Her super conservative parents kicked her out and she ended up moving in with a friend's family. She barely graduated high school. The only reason she did were because of the generosity and support of our teachers and students who volunteered to help her, which is how we met. We were in the same law class in the morning and she had the worst morning sickness that really affected her ability to be in class. So, I took extra notes for her, tutored her, and brought her her stuff if she hadn't come back by the bell. I wasn't the only one who did stuff like this for her and I know she really appreciates all the assistance we gave her. She had the baby a month after we graduated.
She'd signed up for a 911 dispatcher course for after high school because where we live it's a good steady job, with opportunity for certificates and promotions. But she didn't realize how intensive the course would be and had to drop out. She started working at a grocery store bakery, just until she had a better plan. Adam started an apprenticeship while working part time at a hockey rink, and proposed to her literally the day of her eighteenth birthday, and brought up marriage because "it's the right thing to do" (I don't really agree with that but this isn't about me) and she was always refusing.
She started cheating on him after a while (we're all 19 now), and eventually leaves him for another guy because... She's pregnant again and it is far more likely that this guy, baby daddy B who will be referred to as Brad, is the father of the child. Neither of them can afford lawyers so getting any kind of custody agreement is a mess, and then their parents got involved and they did 50/50 split (still not made official). She has the baby, that does turn out to be Brad's, and everything is okay for about nine months, when she finds out Brad has been cheating on her with his TA. Brad decides to pay child support but doesn't really want contact with the kid, only around holidays and one weekend a month for his parents' sake.
She moves back in with her parents (we're all 20 now) who only accept her back because there's grandchildren around. On the plus side, (when she's 21) she gets to take that year long dispatcher course, and passes with flying colours!
After working as a dispatcher for a year (we're all 22 now) she meets a police officer we'll call Chad, who's 26 and married... And Adam's second (?) cousin (I can't remember how they're related, just that Adam and Chad are related somewhat distantly). She has an affair with him (infidelity is super common among cops apparently). She gets knocked up, his wife divorces him, Chad proposes because "it's the right thing to do", she accepts, and her parents kick her out again for being a [insert expletive here], she moves in with Chad with her two kids. They've started planning the wedding, which... Given the background is something akin to a dumpster fire. Adam is LIVID. He was desperately in love with this girl and hasn't really recovered from what she did to him, and while she rejected his proposals years ago, she's accepted one FROM HIS COUSIN WHO PROPSED FOR THE SAME REASON HE DID.
Adam has basically made a call for loyalty in the family, dividing everyone one who should go, who should give money, etc plus they're having trouble planning anything because of COVID. Her parents have outright said that they're not going, along with half of her family, and her younger sister has been going around and sabotaging what plans they can make.
She has asked me to be a bridesmaid, I said that I couldn't because I live in a different province now, but the truth is, I do not want to be wrapped up in that clusterfuck in any way . I'm just watching the arguments and events unfold on social media because this is quite honestly the most entertaining thing I've seen all year. It's weird to me that she even asked because we're not friends, we never have been. We were friendly strangers in high school, I just helped her out for one class because she needed help and I could give it to her. I was just being nice. But based on how she turned out I'm just sad for her. Three kids in four years, and she's alienated so much of her friends and family because if her actions, and I'm torn between feeling sorry for her and putting my head in my hands.
EDIT 1:
First off, all of your comments are hilarious. Second, I'm going to answer some of the common questions.
We're from a city with over 400,000 thousand people, she just comes from the neighbourhood that is made of either bible thumpers or white trash, with no in between. But the high school we went to was in a completely different neighbourhood than that.
Our school had a pretty good sex Ed course, and they gave out free condoms and had resources to help girls get birth control, and they had programs in place for if students ever got pregnant/were going to be teen parents (they also had one of those classes with the dolls for girls who were high risk at teen pregnancy but she wasn't high risk so she wasn't in that class) I don't if BC just didn't work for her, or if she never tried it.
She started alienating her friends after the affair with Chad came out, because people weren't exactly jumping for joy that she'd broken up a marriage (Chad and his ex didn't have any kids, thankfully, so there were less obstacles). When people weren't immediately ecstatic for her she started getting very snippy, rude, and was "calling the bitches out" on social media for not supporting her new relationship or pregnancy. (Tbh I'm really worried about her health because having this many babies so close together is just not good for her health, mental or physical.) People are also worried that Chad will cheat on her "if he'll cheat with you, he'll cheat on you" and think she should avoid marrying him so that she can just leave him if it happens.
I'll give you updates as they come out, but so far it's just a lot of yelling on social media (mostly from her), some relatives slut shaming her, and people who are just really worried about her because, as funny as this is, this doesn't seem like healthy behaviour.
EDIT 2:
First off, I realized I never gave this girl a name. For the sake of clarity we'll call her Beth. I realize that I didn't mention this before, but all of these are fake names.
Second, to everyone commenting that Chad is at fault for his marriage breaking up, believe me I'm well aware of that. It is his ex wife and her family/friends who solely blame Beth. Chad is also older than her and has more life experience, so I do believe that he could potentially be taking advantage of her naivete. However, she is also an adult who is capable of making her own decisions and has chosen to make poor ones in the past.
Third, people who are upset that I'm posting this story here, claiming I'm humiliating her. She has been posting about this mess on every social media platform she has since they got engaged in July. She put this out there long before I did except she did so in front of friends, family, employers, and coworkers, as well as internet randos.
Fourth, despite getting engaged in July and attempting to start planning then, I was only asked to be a bridesmaid three days ago. I knew that there was a mess going on but I didn't really pay attention to it until she asked me to be a bridesmaid. I tried to ask what was going on, I said that she should talk to someone, but when she completely brushed me off I checked her FB and Instagram and found out about all of... This.
Fifth, I realized that I didn't really talk about how disastrous the wedding planning has been going, see here you go:

• they've had to rebook three times because venues and vendors kept cancelling when infection numbers got worse even thought their wedding was months away
• Beth has been flipping between having the wedding while she's pregnant saying she's proud of her bump, and wanting to wait until they're born because she feels fat, which is unfortunate because she's been breaking down due her insecurity on a public platform
• Beth is currently seven months pregnant
• Beth's great aunt was going to give her her wedding dress to wear (after she gives birth) but Beth's mom freaked and stole the dress from said aunt before Beth could get it and is now keeping it, the great aunt says she's too old to get in a fight and has shrugged it off
• Chad's immediate family is paying for the wedding and has been cut off by the rest of their extended family for 'choosing Chad'
• Beth's wedding colours are pink and green, which is usually a nice combo but the specific shades don't go great together, they're her and Chad's favourite colours, which is fine but she literally made a video talking about these colours for 14 minutes on her insta and both of her kids are just full on bawling in the background and she's ignoring them and she's gotten some flack for that
• Adam is finally settled into his trade and has now hired a lawyer and is trying to get primary custody and not allow his daughter to go to the wedding
• she's planning a zoom baby showebachelorette party and has sent out a registry and she's asking for crazy expensive things
• she's also set up a go fund me to help pay for a honeymoon and is making a lot of posts about how no one loves her cause the fund only has $1267 of the $20k she wanted

I'll update when I can but I'm still in school and while I do want to help her, she's refused help offered in the past and there's only so much of this I can take mentally right now.
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UPDATE:
Hey everyone, so some stuff has gone down, and it doesn't look like it's over yet. Sorry, I didn't update sooner, but Rona came back with a vengeance and totally messed up plans with uni and family. Anyway, onto the update.
From the last update - 16th - Lots of ranting and chaotic wedding planning on social media, she found a dress and has decided she will get married while pregnant, they found a local wedding venue that is very lovely, but I'm shocked she's still trying to book stuff with all of their previous venue cancellations.
December 16th - Her little sister unblocked her to call her a s*ut and tell her that all her wedding plans were stupid. This resulted in a petty and entertaining facebook war until the little sis blocked her again on the 17th.
December 18th - Beth went nuts on social media because Adam had "kidnapped" their daughter, what really happened is that because courts are moving at a snail's pace due to COVID and Adam had reason to believe that their daughter was not safe living with Beth he decided to just... Not give her back. They don't have a custody agreement, and when Beth tried to call the cops they couldn't do anything because he was kinda right. There were dozens of videos on her various social media accounts of her ignoring their daughter, yelling at her daughter for crying or doing other things that toddlers do, it turns out that everything she needed was bought by Adam, food, diapers, clothes, toys, daycare (while it was open) etc. on top of the unofficial child support he was paying every month (which turned out to be $500 a month, a number I find ridiculous because Adam was already paying for literally everything) because she refused to buy anything for her daughter and insisted it was Adam's responsibility. Additionally, after the immediate post-birth appointments, Beth never took baby A to a doctor's appointment, she always deferred that to Adam. Baby A's pediatrician has NEVER met Beth. Beth even tried to get Chad to push back or intimidate him or something, but the local police where we live are under one hell of a microscope after a bunch of dirty cops got busted a couple of years ago. Basically, the cops, and the social worker they ended up calling, ended up saying there was nothing she could do until they get to court. The social worker tried to get her to go to therapy and parenting classes, but Beth refused and went on a fifteen paragraph long rant on Facebook about how she doesn't need parenting classes or therapy (she really, really does though) and called the social worker some choice words.
December 19-24 - Just a bunch of ranting on social media, calling everyone who doesn't enable or justify her behaviour cuss words, slurs, and a whole bunch of other horribly creative things. Also, both she and Chad are under investigation at work now, but she has no idea why. I'm gonna take this time to remind everyone that 99% of this info is coming from her public social media pages where her coworkers are friends and place of employment is listed.
December 25 - I am officially embarrassed to know this woman. I didn't go on her FB page until the evening cause I didn't want to deal with drama, first thing in the morning, on Xmas. In the morning she put on a very beautiful blue maternity dress, got Chad in his police blues, and baby B in a purple romper, and then live-streamed her and her family going to the courthouse to get married on Christmas day. (According to her Twitter, part of this was because their newest venue cancelled on them after COVID numbers spiked) Overall, a pretty tacky thing in my opinion because she stated plain as day, several times, that she intended her wedding anniversary to eclipse Christmas for her children because it's just "so much more special, you know?" (I am so glad that Baby B's grandparents are filing for guardianship) But here's the thing... The courthouse isn't open. Because of COVID for one thing, but also because it's Xmas and Canada has a predominantly Christian history. She proceeded to have a full meltdown, and when Baby B cried because, y'know, the kid's mom was screaming up a storm and scaring her, Beth called her a c*nt. Yup. So done with this bitch.
December 28 - I ran into her at a vaccine clinic cause we were both getting our booster shots. She didn't recognize me at first but one of my old bosses (cause I used to work at the hospital the vaccine clinic was in) called my name and said hi, so she came up to me after my old boss had left. We talked a bit while we sat down for the mandatory waiting period after getting the shot. She asked how I was but didn't even wait for me to respond before she started ranting and complaining about her life. I was just going to sit there until the time was up and then just politely make my exit, but when she started talking shit about her kids something inside me snapped. I just said "Do you even like your kids? Do you like being a mom?" She got pretty quiet for a second and then said "no". Idk, her voice and demeanour completely changed and we just sat in silence until our time was up. I said goodbye but it was really awkward.
December 31st (today) - I just looked at her feed and, this is such a shocking what-the-actual-f*** moment. She's thinking about giving up her kids. She went on about how recently she was asked if she liked her kids or being a mom, and how she realized that she didn't. She hates her children and blames them for ruining her life, and how she doesn't want to be a mom. I mean, nothing is official yet, but what the hell?!
I'll update as stuff happens now that I have the time, but this whole thing has been a big giant mess. Also, sorry for any formatting or grammatical errors, I'm not used to using Reddit on my PC.
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UPDATE
Okay, so, some stuff has happened and most of it's good? Also, the TL:DR for this update will be at the bottom
Jan 4th - Beth (and Chad) stopped posting on all social media. I was actually a little worried she died, I mean this woman posts everything short of her trips to the bathroom on IG.
Oddly enough, this got people messaging or interacting with her social media pages because she was usually the one to start contact, and that contact was usually yelling. No one heard from them and some people started to be like "should we call the cops for a wellness check?" Until Chad posted a status saying that they're fine but are "busy, please stop trying to contact us right now". Everyone listened but it was weird.
Jan 11 - I got a notification that Beth and Chad are active on social media again, but I didn't feel like drama so I didn't check out any of their posts.
Jan 12 (today) - she messaged me on FB asking me to be her MOH. She also kept going on about the resort in Cancun that she and Chad were looking to have their wedding at... This coming February. Omnicrom is really bad where we are, so no one should be travelling anywhere. I've actually had to delay my trip back to the province where I go to university. No one should be travelling anywhere.
Beth also found out that Chad was cheating on her with one of her co-workers and called the woman a "homewrecker" on FB tagged her, and posted the texts she found on Chad's phone. But Chad is the "love of her life" so she's forgiven him, but not the other woman. Which I find very hypocritical, considering how she and Chad got together.
She also sent pics of possible bridesmaid dresses and they are the most hideous dresses I've ever seen. I know that some brides do that thing where they want to look a million times better by comparison but this was just ridiculous. One of them looked like a partially deflated balloon with feathers strapped to it. She also openly admitted that she expected everyone attending to pay 3k, 2k would go towards that guest's stay at the resort and 1k would go to her and Chad and they will expected wedding gifts, so that they could get their room for free. Apparently, she talked to someone at the resort and if she got enough people to book their rooms she and Chad would get theirs for free. She also wanted the money to be given to her instead of directly to the hotel so that people wouldn't realize that she was taking 1k of their money. Beth sent me a pic of the wedding dress she wanted, and it's definitely a clubbing dress. If that's what she wants that's fine (and for the record I do think she would look great in it, Beth's (current) dream wedding dress ) but she wants all the guests to be dressed black tie. And she's already sent a list of unreasonable requests. Such as;

• all women must wear heels (for a wedding in the beach???)
• no one is allowed to have a baby or be pregnant (really?)
• girls must have longer than shoulder length hair, boys must have very short hair, only and inch or two long
• no one is allowed to be skinnier than her
• she will be providing diets for everyone attending based on how she wants us to look
• she and Chad must get bachelor and bachelorette parties both in Canada and in Mexico that need to be "fit for a king and queen" and both must be paid for but anyone but the bride and groom "cause that's just tacky"
• no unnatural hair
• no tattoos (you have five tattoos, Beth, and in the dress you want all will be on full display)
• no one is allowed to talk to her directly, they must speak through the MOH and BM

Honestly there's a lot more but I didn't feel like typing all that out. She's posted the list on FB and IG and people are already calling her a bridezilla.
I was also just kinda weirded out because aside from the previous convo at the hospital and when she originally asked me to be a bridesmaid, we haven't spoken since high school. So I respectfully declined, stating that the virus and school were my top concerns right now. Then, I decided to check her socials to see if she'd posted anything. She had and everything was basically how it was before the hiatus... Except her kids are nowhere to be found. No "look at my cute baby" pics are kids crying in the background of her videos. Nothing. Though, based on her new pics of herself, she's given birth to baby C. I mean, she's definitely still recovering, but she also definitely had a baby and that baby is not on any of her socials, so when she responded to my decline with an attempt at guilting me to be her MOH, I asked her where her kids were. This was her response.
"Oh, I left them at the side of the road in our way home from the hospital those moochers could walk home lol"
I was like, please tell me you're not being serious (especially cause it looks like she had the baby days ago). And she replied "I was just joking you shouldn't be so serious all the time". Honey, you made a joke about child abandonment/abuse, you're not being serious enough. And then I finally got the update on the kids.

• Baby A is still with Adam, Beth signed away her rights
• Baby B and Baby C have been given to a mutual cousin of Adam and Chad who is infertile (tbh I didn't need that last tidbit of info or the three paragraph long rant about how God hates infertile women, I didn't even read all of it, I couldn't, and I didn't think that Beth could be so cruel to even think those things). I checked out the FB page of Baby B's grandparents and they're happy with their grandchild's new parents, it looks like the cousin and her husband and welcoming them to the family as another set of grandparents and will let them have access to B. So yay!
• One thing I do need to stress though is that because of COVID the courts in our areas are either moving at a snail's pace or closed, so none of this is "official" but Beth (and Chad) has signed paperwork and all that needs to happen now is presenting that to a judge.

And when I rejoined our convo she said the doc she had for baby C gave her brith control, and she was surprised cause after her first pregnancy she asked her doctor for it but he refused to give her any. She mentioned that her old doctor was also her mom's and sister's doctor, she ended up asking the doc who delivered baby C to be her new doctor, so I hope that works out.
After learning all this my convo with Beth started to go down hill...
Beth: wait, did you actually think I would just leave my kids at the side of the road! I just didn't want to be a mom, but I wasn't a bad one
Me: Beth, I think that you've been through a lot of trauma in the past few years, and that it's gotten to you mentally and that you should speak to a professional.
(Of course, Beth has been a bad mom, but she does need mental health help and I wasn't going to convince her to get it, or to not tell at me, if I said that )
Beth: what? You think I'm crazy?!
Me: no. I think that getting kicked out as a teen because of a pregnancy and having your family actively reject you and try to sabotage you must have been very painful. Plus, pregnancy puts a lot of mental stress on women and you've had three in such a short time span, I just want you to take care of yourself and get what you want in life, and I think that will start with you taking care of your mental health.
Beth: what I want... IS FOR YOU TO GO STRAIGHT TO HELL! Beth then calls me every cuss word, expletive, and derogatory word she can think of one of the words she called me was a derogatory word about people from my ethnicity and my blood is boiling that she thought it was okay to say that to me.
So, I'm now on her hit list. She's been blowing up my social media all day, on her last FB post where she called me a slur she said that she still expects a good wedding gift from me. Yeah, no. So I've blocked her on everything, and I've decided to completely cut off contact. This will be my last update.
TL:DR - Beth went on a social media blackout for a bit, had baby C. Gave up all her kids, baby A is still with Adam, Baby B and Baby C are with a mutual cousin of Adam and Chad and baby B's grandparents have access. Chad cheated on her and she forgave him, but she probably shouldn't have. She's decided to have her wedding in a little over a month in Cancun and is expecting unreasonable things of everyone already. She asked me to be MOH I respectfully declined. I also suggested that she talk to a mental health professional because she's been through a lot in the last few years and she cussed me out, she also called me a derogatory name directed at people of my ethnicity and that was the final nail in the coffin. I'm now on her hit list. But her kids are safe and I have no interest in going to wedding so I'm cutting contact completely and have already blocked her on all my socials. I'm refusing to be involved with her anymore and will not be updating on the situation.
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--- EDIT - NEW UPDATE --- - JANUARY 25, 2023 - TL:DR AT THE BOTTOM
Hi, everyone, I didn't think I would be making another update, but here I am. I don't know if anyone will even care but whatever. I saw a YouTuber, Charlotte Dobre, do an entire video about this post on Facebook (which was funny, she did it well), [editor's note: here's the video in question and also: check out Charlotte Dobre's subreddit !] and got so nervous that Beth was gonna see it. Turned out, she's seen it and does not give a single damn, because as I pointed out, the majority of the info in this post came from her public social media. She also doesn't know who posted it (more on that in the update). I am still no contact with Beth and have no plans to change that anytime soon, but we have mutual friends who have told and shown me what's happened.
First things first, she and Chad did get married, but they eloped. According to all sources they are completely and utterly miserable though. Chad has proven to be and overall lazy and unfaithful husband, and Beth has really gotten into feminism (with a focus on reproductive issues) after she started using birth control, and Roe v Wade getting overturned (even though we're in Canada) really caused tension in their marriage. As it turns out, Chad thinks that abortion is murder and God created women for the purpose of making babies.
Beth tried to argue that not all women want or should be mothers using herself as an example, and then Chad went ahead and used her as an example of why women should be forced to have kids, because in the end she gave kids to an infertile couple. She didn't take that well and said that her entire life and future was ripped away from her and destroyed the second she got pregnant with baby A. Adam was never slut shamed or demeaned like she was, both at home and at school (which is a fair point, myself and many others were helpful and supportive but there were a lot of people who judged the hell out of her and said really nasty stuff) and that if she hadn't gotten pregnant she would've gone to college or university because she lost the general and financial support of her family with that positive pregnancy test. Chad has made a Tinder account. Beth was informed but it doesn't seem like she gave a damn.
So basically you could cut the tension with a knife.
And with her family, her sister came out as gay and cut off/has been cut off from their parents. But she's got a partial scholarship so she's doing okay. She and Beth are NOT on good terms but have met up and acknowledged that their parents messed them up by being religious nuts and their parents encouraged them to be competitive with each other and sabotage each other. Apparently their dad's motto is "competition brings out the best in everyone" (ugh). But they've talked and that's good enough for now.
Neither Beth nor Chad have custody or visitation of their children, which Chad is starting to regret because he's suddenly getting more and more into the church and religion. Chad talked to Beth about getting baby C back but Beth shut that down hard and warned the cousin who adopted baby C (officially and legally btw).
Beth started going to therapy after she and Chad got married, which makes me very happy and excited for her.
There was a rumour going around that Chad has a mistress and it took me a while to confirm, but it's true. He's cheating on her with a paramedic and she knows. Beth is fully aware. Idk if she plans to do anything about it or just continue to ignore it, but I hope she leaves his ass. I'm still not gonna talk to her, she crossed so many lines, but she's grown and improved a lot and her life would be a lot better without that sac of scum in her life.
Now, I have given a few details in my post that should've revealed my identity to her, namely her asking me to be her MOH. I have found out that she actually asked around 15 girls (including myself) to be her MOH, without telling any of us about the others because she was trying to get money from all of us and because her mental health has just been very bad and she needed help. And of those 15, 8 have been going to school out of province and of those eight we all had basically the same classes in high school. And apparently doesn't remember our discussion at the vaccination clinic and had major blow up with everyone she asked to be MOH. So she knows it's one of 8 people and reportedly has no interest in trying to narrow that number down. (Chad did the same thing with his groomsmen, but idk any of the numbers)
TL:DR Beth and Chad got married (eloped), are miserable, have zero custody or visitation with any of their children, Chad's cheating and Beth doesn't appear to care, Chad is super sexist, Beth is a feminist now, Beth's sister is gay and they've talked but not reconciled, Beth asked too many girls to be MOH for money and doesn't know the ID of who made this post.
Dear "Beth", if this post gets forwarded to you or somehow graces your phone screen, leave Chad. He's trash and you'll be much better without him in your life. And though I'm not willing to talk to you again because of your words and actions, I do wish for you to have a wonderful and happy life.
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I'm not the OOP!

It’s been 6 months of NC and sometime in that period I blocked them on snapchat. Now, I have unblocked them as I’ve moved on, but it made me unfollow her. I dont know if I should refollow her or not, since I dont want to seem like I’m trying to reach out again since we have been ignoring eachother at school for a while. I know I shoulf probably just let things be, but some input wouldn’t hurt

I found out my WS was having an emotional affair with a friend from high school that confessed to having feelings for him after his high school girlfriend broke up with him. They started chatting a lot after I thought we had healed from DD1/2 (no PA). I blocked her on everything on his phone when I found out, including social media. I few days after DD3 he unblocked her phone number without telling me to inform her that I found out about their constant texting and flirty messages/exchanged videos/pictures and communication would need to stop. Their interactions were nothing sexual, but flirty, calling each other baby and even using a non-English word I thought was reserved for me. He always said he was providing her "emotional support" because she had a shitty husband that was inept with taking care of their 3 kids. I found out later he would complain about me to her as well. Their friendship was a thorn in my side, but he was pretending to be transparent, telling me all her marriage drama but leaving out the fact he was flirting with her. I never brought up my concern (even after after DD1/2) because I desperately wanted to trust him.
It took 6-7 months after to get to a good spot again together. It felt like it was finally true, that your marriage can heal after infidelity and be strongebetter than before. Things were great from Nov 2023 until now. (We hosted 20+ members of his family in our home for New Years. Everyone complimented that I was a great host and he said my WS was grateful for it. I grew up a single child with very little interaction with my extended family, plus I'm introverted so having a lot of family around was different for me but I tried my best.) I stopped looking through his phone for a few months then checked it a few weeks ago. He unblocked the AP on social media and I saw he has searched for her. I confronted him and we had a huge fight. Our young kid was home and kept coming downstairs to check on us. He kind of broke and hugged me and we rug swept the issue. He has to travel often for his work that entails 2 different jobs. This past month he's been home for a few days then leaves for a week or two. He came home recently and we had an impromptu camping trip. I realized in the car that he changed his phone password (turning his phone away from me to unlock it). It was extremely triggering and I couldn't be in the moment most of the trip which made me angry because we were on a pleasure trip.
After two more trips of his, he began prodding me if I was okay because I had been moping. I finally told him that I was upset about a fight we had a while ago and the fact he changed his phone password. He explained he unblocked his AP on social media because for him, personally, he wants to know that he can have a person unblocked but control the urge to reach out to them. (I obviously don't feel the same.) I told him that if she reached out to him, I wanted him to tell me. He disagreed and felt that he wouldn't want to ruin a good day to tell me that information. (I'm currently reading Not Just Friends and know that being transparent would allow greater intimacy between married spouses.)
So now I'm stuck in a hard spot. I love my husband. We both have solid careers, bring good money home, we have a happy young daughter, a beautiful home that we own. We're able to have my parents watch our daughter so we can have time to ourselves. We created a sanctuary in our backyard, see a lot of wildlife and started to grow our own food. He's amazing in every way besides his method of painkiller (cheating/flirting with other women) which I believe stems from childhood because his father cheated on his mom and had a kid out of wedlock.
I told him that if he cannot agree to an open phone policy anymore that we may not be compatible: Separation/Divorce. I can see he is stressed from this. Now that I got it off my chest about my condition for our marriage, I'm more at peace at the moment. But I see that he is pained. In turn, I want to be loving to him because it's what is natural to me and I hate seeing him upset.
I'm disappointed that it has come to this a year+ after DD3 and we had been doing amazing for the past few months. We've had the best time in our marriage that we ever have. I have a storm inside of me but I have a brave face on for my kid. If anyone has advice on how to approach this, I would appreciate it.

She moved away to South Carolina to help with her grand daughter while her daughter enlisted in the air force. She works 3 days and babysits her daughter’s apartment while she’s away. Our agreement was to use the time away to work on ourselves for each other. She’s been back to Florida a few times to see us but only for 1 or 2 days at a time. Last time she was back, I noticed she formed a bond with her co workers as she wanted to buy them post cards and refrigerator magnets as gifts. I thought it was a nice gesture. I called her one evening before her daughter left for boot camp and she mentioned she was invited to go to the club with her co workers and she wanted to go one time before her daughter leaves. I told her I didn’t think it was a good idea and she said she wasn’t going anymore. I noticed emotional distance growing between us and wanted to understand what was happening in her life so I planned a trip to visit her in South Carolina. She appeared happy to see me and we kindled our relationship making love and eating. Feeling that something wasn’t right, I sat her down and asked if she’s been with anyone else. She 1st said no but then She told me she been intimate with a coworker in her daughters apartment. She mentioned it was more than once and it was unprotected. She apologized for putting me at risk and swears it was a mistake because she got lonely and it’s over now. She’s since then apologized and swears she’s back focused. Her daughter had recently graduated from boot camp and is now in training school for the next 3 months. She called me a few days ago to tell me that her daughter will be stationed in Wyoming and she will return home once she gets her settled. I was taken back by the distance of Florida to Wyoming however, I was glad to hear the end is close. The next morning I decided to view her ig stories and I found she reposted a graduation post from her job that included the guy she slept with along with other people and other co workers. I contacted her and asked her about the post. She said it wasn’t about him but the other students she was proud of who graduated. Later I went back to her page to show a friend the post and discovered she had blocked me from seeing her stories. When I confronted her about it she said it was for the best but later unblocked. She still seems distant but swears she’s taking time for herself. She says the guys doesn’t work there anymore and she’s no longer in contact. I have no way to know if she’s still involved.

Hello guys,
My ex-girlfriend (24F) and I (24M) met in high school. We were together for over 5 years and had been close friends for 8 years. Our relationship was beautiful, filled with fond memories, and we had future plans together (including marriage). We were very happy until 3 months ago when we broke up. About 4 months ago, a guy from my girlfriend's class started getting closer to her. They became friends, and eventually, the guy developed feelings for my ex-girlfriend. Since he knew the negative aspects of our relationship, it didn't take him long to win my ex-girlfriend's interest. He left the doors wide open, even suggesting that he accepts my ex-girlfriend while still loving me. Three months ago, my ex-girlfriend told me that she thinks she's in love with this guy, and she wants to break up with me. At first, I refused, but when I couldn't change her mind, I said, "I'm leaving. You'll regret your decision a lot, but it'll be too late." Then I left her apartment (the last time seeing her face to face. From here all of the conversations were on the phone.). At that moment, her feelings and thoughts completely reversed, and she tried to get me back. She said, "I don't love him, I don't want him, I want you, I love you etc." Although I was initially firm, 2 days after I said, "I can give you another chance." She was happy at first, but an hour later she said, "I don't know, I need some time to think carefully." So, I told her, "You can't make me an option and keep me waiting," and I gave up. She asked for another chance again. This cycle repeated three times, and 10 days after the breakup, I said that I don’t want to reconcile again and burned the bridges. (I deleted messages, photos, sent our memory box to her, unfollowed all her social media accounts, etc.)
She constantly called and messaged me. Although she sometimes acted as if she wouldn't reconcile with me, most of the time, she showed that she wanted me back. (hot and cold but most of the time hot) She didn't delete anything related to me. She said things like, "I want you; I don't know why I put us through this," etc. During this process, she had a half-friend, half-flirt relationship with that guy. She talked about me to him, saying that I was everything to her, like family, etc. (I'm sure she wasn't lying). When I burned the bridges, I didn’t want her to be with him. So I told her that all her actions would be forgivable as long as she didn't have a relationship with that guy but also I can’t be with her while this guy is around her. There were 4 months left until she finished school, and after that, she wouldn't see him again. Their hometowns were far apart. So, I told her that if she didn't do anything irreversible (sex, starting a relationship), after school, we could reconcile. My goal was to prevent her from being in a relationship with him during these 4 months. I never thought of reconciliation. For about 2 month, I faithfully followed this plan and talked to her on WhatsApp. She constantly expressed a desire to reconcile, and I politely refused, but I didn't make her to give up hope.
Four weeks ago, I gave up my plan during a conversation and told her that I no longer wanted her in my life in any way. I blocked her on the phone, WhatsApp, Instagram, and Telegram. She tried to reach me by email and sending money to my bank account (saying that she can’t live without me, she is in a great pain, she literally begs for everything). After 24 hours, I sent her an email asking her to give up her efforts and that I could never forgive what she did. She wrote another e mail for begging, and I said, “I won’t reconcile with you ever again.” Then she finally stopped reaching me. Since then, she hasn't written to me. 2 days ago, I realized that she had mistakenly subscribed to Amazon Prime with my credit card 3 months ago. I unblocked her on WhatsApp and asked her to cancel the subscription and delete my card. She did what I asked and sent back the money from the previous months. But I didn't block her on WhatsApp again, thinking it would be strange. Right now, she's not blocked on WhatsApp.
To me, she is having a great deal of dilemma and she want two of us in her pocket so she can freely choose whenever she wants. But when I run away from her, she chased me with everything.
What do you think about my ex-girlfriend's emotional and mental processes? What is she thinking right now? What could her future with this guy be?
Thank you for your comments.

Sorry for my bad english
Well, I have been with my girlfriend for a little over 2 years, I am M19 F19, we are about to start college and there are changes that I did not expect so soon.
My girlfriend is not one to have a lot of friends or girlfriends in general, she always had 1 or 2 at most and lately we are spending more time together than we have in a while.
She started talking to high school classmates these days and I was happy that she had friends outside of our relationship.
She started talking to a guy she met before she met me, she told me once that she used to like him a few years ago, and a few months ago we had a discussion in which she mentioned that she dreamed about him doing romantic things and it didn't affect me because I knew it was part of her past but I found it weird, since she almost took it as an excuse to end the relationship, according to me because she was confused.
These days she started to make contact with him and a few more friends that she told me about making a group between them, when she mentioned it to me I felt a little surprised and a little insecure, I mentioned it to her and she told me calm is just that I want to have friends and I thought it was a good idea to contact them and take the friendship again well, I replied it seems good but I just wanted wue keep in mind that it makes me a little uncomfortable that situation, but I do not want you to change or stop talking to her then ended that conversation without getting to much , just me accepting the idea.
Yesterday we went to an event in which I went away from her for a while to go to the bathroom telling her that I would wait for her at the entrance because her father was going to pick her up, so I could accompany her to the bathroom, then time passed and I saw her going out with a guy that didn't look familiar smiling and laughing and looking somewhat flirtatious while talking to her, then my mood changed, I felt jealous and insecure (I must admit that I was very rude) I approached her without knowing how I should act because she was not meeting and being friendly with guys in general, and even less if they were strangers so I went to meet them and I went ahead of them in an abrupt way, with a face of a bitter feeling I went out and went ahead to meet her father, she had dropped something but I only saw it out of the corner of my eye while I was picking it up and I don't know for sure what happened with the guy I was with, then I got to her father and I said goodbye with a low voice while I went on my way (I know, very rude). By the time I got home I grabbed my cell phone and started blocking and unblocking her and the networks and unfollowing her and things I'm not proud to say, then I calmed down and thought better of it and it didn't make sense what I was doing.
She sent me a message apologizing for how she left and asking me if it was ok because the previous attitude is not normal for me (I am usually too affectionate and attentive to her so she thought it was weird) then I explained to her why I was that way, she told me it was a partner from an ex-job that just told her what happened with that place, I felt partly relieved and embarrassed by my attitude, and all that night I behaved in a bad way with her so to speak, then she sent me messages saying your way of acting and the way you treat me when you get like that, I do not like and it makes me uncomfortable, to think that if I have more friends when you see me you will behave that way and that is very selfish of you.
In the night tonight I dreamt 2 times of her being with the two guys I mentioned to you and it put me in a weird mood, the first one being of her dating the first guy, being affectionate and such, the second one with her ex co-worker kissing and being boyfriend and girlfriend while I watched. Today in the morning I told her about the dreams and she said it's your problem to think I'll be with other guys and it got me thinking.
It's worth saying that I'm a little insecure physically, because of my height and how skinny I am, I've always struggled with jealousy for years, I try to handle it and not let it affect me too much but it always comes out in one way or another.
I don't want to keep feeling like this, pretending like I feel good in front of her, because it affects me, my relationship, my mood and therefore everything else.
How can I stop feeling this way? What do you think about my situation?

Hello guys,
My ex-girlfriend (24F) and I (24M) met in high school. We were together for over 5 years and had been close friends for 8 years. Our relationship was beautiful, filled with fond memories, and we had future plans together (including marriage). We were very happy until 3 months ago when we broke up. About 4 months ago, a guy from my girlfriend's class started getting closer to her. They became friends, and eventually, the guy developed feelings for my ex-girlfriend. Since he knew the negative aspects of our relationship, it didn't take him long to win my ex-girlfriend's interest. He left the doors wide open, even suggesting that he accepts my ex-girlfriend while still loving me. Three months ago, my ex-girlfriend told me that she thinks she's in love with this guy, and she wants to break up with me. At first, I refused, but when I couldn't change her mind, I said, "I'm leaving. You'll regret your decision a lot, but it'll be too late." Then I left her apartment (the last time seeing her face to face. From here all of the conversations were on the phone.). At that moment, her feelings and thoughts completely reversed, and she tried to get me back. She said, "I don't love him, I don't want him, I want you, I love you etc." Although I was initially firm, 2 days after I said, "I can give you another chance." She was happy at first, but an hour later she said, "I don't know, I need some time to think carefully." So, I told her, "You can't make me an option and keep me waiting," and I gave up. She asked for another chance again. This cycle repeated three times, and 10 days after the breakup, I said that I don’t want to reconcile again and burned the bridges. (I deleted messages, photos, sent our memory box to her, unfollowed all her social media accounts, etc.)
She constantly called and messaged me. Although she sometimes acted as if she wouldn't reconcile with me, most of the time, she showed that she wanted me back. (hot and cold but most of the time hot) She didn't delete anything related to me. She said things like, "I want you; I don't know why I put us through this," etc. During this process, she had a half-friend, half-flirt relationship with that guy. She talked about me to him, saying that I was everything to her, like family, etc. (I'm sure she wasn't lying). When I burned the bridges, I didn’t want her to be with him. So I told her that all her actions would be forgivable as long as she didn't have a relationship with that guy but also I can’t be with her while this guy is around her. There were 4 months left until she finished school, and after that, she wouldn't see him again. Their hometowns were far apart. So, I told her that if she didn't do anything irreversible (sex, starting a relationship), after school, we could reconcile. My goal was to prevent her from being in a relationship with him during these 4 months. I never thought of reconciliation. For about 2 month, I faithfully followed this plan and talked to her on WhatsApp. She constantly expressed a desire to reconcile, and I politely refused, but I didn't make her to give up hope.
Four weeks ago, I gave up my plan during a conversation and told her that I no longer wanted her in my life in any way. I blocked her on the phone, WhatsApp, Instagram, and Telegram. She tried to reach me by email and sending money to my bank account (saying that she can’t live without me, she is in a great pain, she literally begs for everything). After 24 hours, I sent her an email asking her to give up her efforts and that I could never forgive what she did. She wrote another e mail for begging, and I said, “I won’t reconcile with you ever again.” Then she finally stopped reaching me. Since then, she hasn't written to me. 2 days ago, I realized that she had mistakenly subscribed to Amazon Prime with my credit card 3 months ago. I unblocked her on WhatsApp and asked her to cancel the subscription and delete my card. She did what I asked and sent back the money from the previous months. But I didn't block her on WhatsApp again, thinking it would be strange. Right now, she's not blocked on WhatsApp.
To me, she is having a great deal of dilemma and she want two of us in her pocket so she can freely choose whenever she wants. But when I run away from her, she chased me with everything.
What do you think about my ex-girlfriend's emotional and mental processes? What is she thinking right now? What could her future with this guy be?
Thank you for your comments.

My estranged wife has told me last week that she is very afraid of me. Says that I have extreme violent tendencies. Tells me that my family & kid are afraid of me. People in our community are afraid me.
My family isn’t afraid. My kid definitely is not. The community isn’t. I have not been in a fight since high school ( class of 1990). I have never been charged with any violent crime.
I am in general a pacifist.
My wife, who is supposed to be afraid of me, has been texting me. She’s been calling me.
She showed up at our house , alone, wanting to know why I wasn’t answering her calls or texts. Twice. ( I had her blocked, I have unblocked her since so I can respond & have her not show up unannounced)
Does she like someone who is afraid?
ETA: Neither of us has filed for anything. No kids.
ETA2: in our relationship, she was the one in charge. I was the quiet one. Basically she ran the show. Until her mental health crisis.

Almost two years ago, I met a girl while playing online. At first, I took interest in her since she was one of the few girls I was talking to. However, as time went by, our friends started to ship us together. Eventually, we fell in love for real. We used to have calls every day, sometimes for up to 13 hours. It was the first love for both of us. We continued to have calls and text daily for 2 months since we lived far apart. We even met up once and took a walk on the beach. After those 2 months, I started to feel like she was losing interest, texting less and seeming less excited, which at the time felt like I was going to lose the love of my life. Remember, it was my first time experiencing this. She had become a person who greatly affected my mood and happiness as a whole. Another month went by, and eventually, we broke up. It was her who wanted to end it as she had fallen into depression. During that time, I didn't want to let her go, so a month later, I asked for a second chance. We had an argument, and I was blocked.
I ended up blocking all the friends that reminded me of her and wanted to constantly spend time with me for 6 months, to deal with everything on my own in peace and to get away from anything that reminded me of her. By the time they finally got me to unblock them and return, I started to see her again in voice calls, and my feelings returned. It didn't take long until I was writing to her again, and we made up. Over the next 9 months, I was extremely clear that I wished for us to try again, but I received so many different signals from her. I asked if I was friendzoned; she replied yes but edited the text after I told her I needed some time to process that. She edited it so that she could give me the chance when she is ready, which may take months or years. Other times, she said that school was her priority and she needed to hold her feelings down. She has told me that she just can't love herself or anybody else, to which I have always said I could give her time. Her responses seem to change every now and then. During our last call, I asked her straightly what I had done wrong or what put her off in my eyes. She only said that it's herself and I didn't do anything wrong. For the past 2 years, I have hoped that she could come to understand herself. She has mental issues which I am aware of, and that's also been the reason why I have stuck around, constantly supporting her, and knowing that the reason she doesn't want to be with me is not because of other person.I feel like she is just dealing with so much right now and doesn't want the loss of freedom that comes with being in a relationship. It is what I hope is the case. Or she doesn't really love me at all and just didn't want to hurt me for 9 months until a week ago. We were talking openly about our lives weekly for 9 months. She straightly told me that she has no romantic feelings left for me, that she never asked to be supported and to leave her alone. Right now she hasn't blocked me, but I did it today myself. I removed her from every social media platform I have, along with some of those annoying friends, and deleted nearly 25 GB of old pictures and videos of memories that we had.
Is my approach the way to go? Should I just remove myself from being around her? Or should I have stayed and accepted that the girl I have loved for 2 years be just my friend?

He’s too basic. I don’t understand all the love and admiration for this pre-school level fighter. I mean I know WHY people obsess over him, but that’s a topic for another day. “Errmm, cRuSaDEs!… ermgh hOLy LaNDs”….
He’s easy to beat if the opponent is lazy but his entire gimmick is 2 moves. You just spam 2 unblockables and that’s it.
Oh let me guess warden player. The heavy unblockable is a feint for an easy GB? How original. Mr.Titanium shoulder here is just gonna charge up his shoulder real quick so he can move at Mach 5 speed to interrupt an attack. Good thing I can just dodge backwards and completely dismantle your whole attack.
My most hated hero in the game is undoubtedly Warden. He’s ugly. Armor set is trash. He doesn’t look realistic. Voice line sucks. Hideous animations. Shoulder bash is a brain dead move used as a gimmick.
Everyone has a 50/50 move. His is my most hated. I usually always beat them. I just plain don’t like him. Raider should be the face of For Honor not warden.

Hello, I (F22) need advice regarding my friendship that was cut off almost a year ago. So myself and my bestfriend (F22) were great friends from grade 11 til 2nd year of college. We would hangout for days in a row and would always call or text everyday as well, I was considered family and she was as well on my end. We had the best times together and taught each other many things, I loved her a lot and care for her as well. Towards the end of our friendship she supported me less and took a mutual friends side as I got into an incident with one of them (it was 100% the other friends fault) and she supported the other friend when they were an addict, liar, cheater snd a toxic person. This broke my heart as it was betrayal and I felt like I was left behind, I got very busy with school and I wasn’t able to hangout with her as much while this was going on so the space away without clear communication did not help at all. I ended up going to her place to pick up something she had borrowed from me and that was the last time I saw her. A few days later I asked to grab drinks so we could talk and hopefully fix things and she refused and did not want to be friends anymore, I was sort of on the same page but I desperately wanted to sort things out because she mattered a lot to me. The texted back and forth turned into us just saying it how it was and me pointing out how she didn’t care for me or support be despite the toxicity from other ppl around us that were mean to me, she agreed that she needed to change and do better but one thing, she pointed out she didn’t feel it was necessary to block eachother but I went ahead and did on absolutely everything like two minutes later because I couldn’t stand not being friends with her and looking at her stuff online still :( a few months after her bday passed which was 3 months after the blocked and no contact she blocked me back on everything. It has now almost been a year and I have unblocked on everything as I have mentally forgiven her and I so desperately want to make amends or at least have a conversation in person. I feel as though she would not want this if I were to reach out and I’m too scared to do so, I’ve honestly hope she would reach out but I do not know what to do in this situation

Let’s call him “K”. I hung out with “K” several times and have known him since 2013 so I didn’t think he was dangerous. At the end of 2014, he asked me to hang with him at a seedy bar and my stupid ass agreed. A guy I was friends with was at the bar too and him being there probably saved my life. I don’t remember drinking anything after drinking one drink and I don’t think it was alcoholic. I couldn’t stand after that everything seemed so hazy. My money was missing and my phone. I asked my friend what happened because he dropped me. He told me that “K” left me at their table and that I pretty much threw up everywhere, he tried looking for my phone but everything was missing, and I couldn’t stand. I tried remembering what happened but I couldn’t. He posted a picture on Snapchat 2 days later with “his new phone” I tried to track it with find my phone but it was disabled. I think he saw me put in my password, at the time it was “0000”. I asked him about it and he blocked me, He unblocked me 20 minutes later and told me that it was a “glitch” I didn't believe him but I came up with a dumb plan. I was going to “steal my phone back”. I asked him if he wanted to hang out and he said he was busy so I waited. On New Year's he asked me if I wanted to hang out and I thought “This is my chance” I went to his place and tried to turn on “find my phone” just in case I couldn’t steal it, and I was very unsuccessful and he caught me. I was raped and after it happened I tried to ignore it and pretend it never but I ended up missing my period. I tried to talk to him about it saying I wouldn’t tell anyone what happened if he could help me deal with it. He called me a “Pathetic Ugly Whore” and that no one would believe me and that I was “making it up”. I was paranoid and not okay, I was scared to take a pregnancy test but I eventually did. I wasn’t pregnant and it was the stress.
A couple of weeks after it happened. I started talking to this girl online who sent me a request and she seemed nice, she introduced me to her friends. Turns out they didn’t want to be my friend; they were his friends. He wanted to know if I was going to report him or not, I was so close to telling my dad and my friend convinced me not to and that I should try to move on. I don’t know why but I trusted them, they came into my life when I needed someone.
After being raped I took pictures of the bruises on my chest and arms because at the time I did want to report it. I started to chicken out because I was scared that no one would believe me and I was so scared. I told them about the pictures. They tried to convince me to delete it. I started to feel uneasy around them and distanced myself. I was terrified and decided to stalk them online. She went to preschool with one of my friends from school so I asked her about them. Turns out she and my rapist live in the same apartment. My friend from school, my rapist, and his friend who pretended to be my friend went to the same preschool. I found out that her boyfriend and my rapist are pretty close too. I was so traumatized and paranoid, that I thought everyone was out to get me. I stopped going to school and pretty much tanked some of my papers. I didn’t do anything with my life, I was going to be premed and after this whole incident, I couldn’t get out of bed for years. I was a virgin and religious but this ruined my faith in god and people. I have nightmares, I don’t trust anyone and I am suspicious of everyone. I am starting to work on myself and get better but I think of what my life could’ve been and I feel sad again.

Really really sorry for the big post and bad grammer. I'm an intelligent fellow but I really need help. I have nothing much to live for and haning by a thread.
First a little information about myself. I'm 23 years old, I currently live with my mother and younger brother (he's 12) and I'm their only financial support for now (I used to help them before by lying to my father and pretending to take money for myself but now they're fully dependent on me for everything like schooling, travel, food etc, ever since I got my job last year). I have been suffering from insomnia for the past 2 years mainly because things went from worse to way worse in my home and I was depressed and blamed myself for everything even though it's mainly my father and partially my mother's fault.
Now coming to the relationship, I got into my first ever relationship in 2021, it was a long distance. I was very naive, I matched this girl a few months ago on tinder and I asked her to meet me just a few days before I leave for college. We met and she said it was her best first date ever. I also told her that I don't want to marry anyone ( strange but I thought this was a big deal so I should be upfront), she told me later that she didn't hear it. Now, the next day, she asked me if we were dating, I happily said yes and she said hello boyfriend (I didn't know dating exactly meant being committed, I know pretty stupid.) I said okay let's go with the flow, we went on a few dates it was really good, but the problem was she wasn't physically attractive to me but I felt so horrible and guilty even for thinking that. Her personality was great, but this was my very first relationship, I pushed myself very hard for her (she also did), I learned how to drive for her, I was so scared because she lived pretty far and I never used to go that far but I did. I am a very cheap person when it comes to spending myself and never used to ask for money from home because we weren't that well financially and I also was told by my father that I should be grateful he gave me home and food like it's a favour he's doing. We'll a few days later I went to my college (it's pretty far away), I cried while going.
The next time I came back, things weren't as good, the not being attracted thing was getting me but I felt so horrible for it and hated myself. I starved myself in college and used to run for an hour daily without eating to lose fat for her (she didn't tell me to). I was miserable, I couldn't sleep, things were rough at home. I already had issue with self hatred because I couldn't do anything to make my mother proud and support her. I came back home, was very weak and lost a lot of weight. I again pushed myself for her, I went to meet her immediately after 40 hours of travel, barely any sleep and food. I was miserable.
One thing, she also pushed herself a lot, she had ocd and was studying to become a dentist, she used to come to meet me after whole day of college and ocd.
Now there was another issue that she made me spent (she used to give her half bill, but the cafes we went were expensive and also my car fuel and cab rent), as I said our financial situation was not that great and I hated asking for money because I felt I didn't deserve it.
This was the first time I asked to break up, I realised I came into the relationship too fast. But she said that she doesn't beleive in just giving up and we should fight it if we truly love each other. I was convinced and felt bad because I felt like I didn't fight for love.
This happened a few times ( I'm a little immature, I tried to breakup during a few of our fights when I couldn't bear it, I'm not saying I was not at fault in the fight, I have a habit of streching arguments a bit).
We always suffered because of my father's ego (still are), during our fights she told me I have a huge ego, and saying abuses is commen in her family so she abused me a few times during fight. I was fine with it but still it hurts, she told me that abusing is fine because she doesn't mean it but what I say is worse. I said that she was selfish and once I said don't act like victims and she was furious, I had to apologise.
We were fighting so much over phone, and on petty things. Once she was telling me abot a case in which a man's wife cheated him with his younger brother and I was shocked and said how can a younger brother do this he is related by blood and she was upset that I don't consider wife as equal and what if she marries me. I said that I've seen partners cheating but not with younger brother but she said I am gaslighting (I've never heard of this term before) her and it's not possible that I've not seen younger brother cheating with wife even in porn. I apologize after arguing a lot.
Once we were discussing about marriage and I said we can live a few days before marrying to get used to or see our habits and she got upset. See, a lot of the times she asks very hard question and I haven't given it a thought and she demands an answer so I say something that might upset her and we fight.
I was fed up of fighting and being called gaslighter, manipulators, having the biggest ego and that 95% fights are my fault. She was awesome, she used to give me so many gifts (I'm never used to it) and talk to me. But fighting took a very heavy toll for me and I because I felt horrible for the attraction things and also for fights I pushed myself to the limits for her everytime.
I am an extremely shy person when it comes to crowds and very insecure. But I danced for he infront of big crowds in public places for her videos even though I was so so uncomfortable I could've killed myself. I travelled to a city for her and stayed in a shitty dormatery in which my food was stolen, there also was no air conditioning and it was extremely hot. She also did a lot for me, once she came to the city in which I lived in for her vacation with her mother. I went to surprise her with flowers. I think that's too much information. Also, she told me in the beginning of relationship, no sex for 2 years, I agreed.
Now I was fed up with fighting and broke up once but it was terrible so went back. Finally, I broke up with her in April last year (1 year ago) and stopped contact. But she contacted me one day after a month to see how I was doing and it spiraled into talking and meeting. I again stopped contact and she contacted me to check up on her and that spiraled again into meeting and talking. I helped her every way I can because of the extreme guilt that I broke up and she said that I shouldn't have and she won't be able to find someone as compatible and it made me feel horrible everytime she said it. We again had a lot of fights in this 1 year period and I kept stopping contact. Once I was coming back from a date and she told me that she has exams and shes in a pretty bad state and asked me to stop using the dating app for a month or too and not meet anyone and meet her. I agreed and just before her exams were ended we had a fight and I stopped contact.
She was still not over me and made me feel guilty saying how can I be so cold, and if I truly loved her I would've tried more and she's suffering so much because of me and I have give her so much trauma. I feel so horrible everytime she says this and give hints to come back into relationship.
She made me swear to tell her if I makeout with someone or come into relationship. A lot of the times she makes me swear many things for reaffirmation. I was always extremely loyal, did everything for her(she also did a lot). But she said that I didn't so much mentally only physically I did.
Now I have very bad insomnia, I lost almost all of my friends (they're fine but turned out selfish and I was the one doing everything for them), my family situation is very bad, I'm stuck in this job which is nightshift and have insomnia, I got 1-2 days without sleep regularly, I have no one to talk to, I can't leave work because almost all my salary goes to helping my mother with her career and brother's studies. I haven't spent even 10 percent of my total salary on myself till date. I also have given her a lot of money in these past few month's to help her. I used to go to help and listen to her trouble even recently after 1 year of breakup even after I haven't slept for a day or two but I went. I pushed myself for everyone.
She says she wants to come back into relationship, I have told her so many times that I don't have feelings and mg life is a mess (she's also going through a lot so it's not not only me).
I came to my cousin sister's house a few days ago (my only relative who I talk to that also rarely), I was super drunk and her husband's sister came on me and we made out. I felt horrible and guilty. I told my ex because I promised and she is angry and said a lot of maan things like she thought I was good but I'm not, I'm so cold like Robot, how can I do this. (She had also made out with a guy when we had broken up but it's different she said because she thought there's no hope and we were not in contact.). I finally blocked her after an year of all this. I'm feeling horrible, I have no motivation to live, I hate my life and myself. I'm only living for my mother and brother who don't seem to be grateful or even care because they spend my hard earned money a bit carelessly (It's the first time I've earned, I know I'm a bad guy for saying they are not spending carefully but my working condition is horrible, I work without sleeping for 2 days or even more sometimes, I had to keep laughing because I teach and fake emotions).
I am hanging by a thread, I might've screwed mg ex's life and couldn't do much for my brother and mother. I might've list my only love and now my ex willl also say more bad thing's about me to others (I'm human, it feels bad to think that after pushing myself even though it's not that much, I'll be talked so badly).
What should I do about her, should I unblock and apologize (I've done it before, not the blocking part, that's first).
I'm hanging by a thread, I just want to die, had been struggling with these thoughts for so long.
Am I a horrible person in this relationship (I already am aware about a lot of bad aspects of mine, I have ego and mentally I couldn't change and couldn't find her attractive)..
Tl;dr: Blocked my ex an year after breakup. Physically pushed myself to limits for her because it was my first relationship. She said I didn't try enough and am not a good person. I am in a really bad place in life, hanging by a thread, there's nothing left to live. Did I do the wrong thing by breaking up?
Edit- Thank you, thank you so much everyone. I didn't think that anyone would read this mess and reply. I'm so grateful, these responses made me cry a bit. I won't forget your kind words, thank you, thank you, thank you.