Bad habits what are bad habits

My girlfriend has several large tattoos. I grew up in a strictly conservative religion and was taught my whole life that tattoos are wrong and bad and you shouldn't get them. I like the natural look of a woman's skin and it's hard to do that if all I can see is a giant snake tattoo. It's a turn off for me. I don't see it as an improvement to natural skin at all.
I've made progress. I don't have any more religous connotations to over come. I really like this girl. She's a perfect match for me and literally everything I've been looking for in a woman. She asked me what I thought and I couldn't lie to her. What I want is to get over it. Are there any couples out there like this? How can I get to the point where I don't notice or don't care? Does it just take time?

For context I’m in year 9 (idk what that is in America, but 13-14 y/o), and this past school year has been crazy, main event was getting a major concussion from falling (very badly 😭) off my horse in January that just kind of started a domino effect of other issues, but this one teacher helped me so much, and made me actually enjoy German (I hated it beforehand..).
“I was originally going to write this in German but decided it was better to be safe than sorry - my German has its moments…
I just wanted to say thankyou for everything, I never thought that German would have such a large role in my life, but here we are! As my mum said on parents evening, I do really hope to become fluent one day, and am definitely going to continue with it after I leave - hopefully paired with Italian and Russian! Not only that but you have become an inspiration to me, to keep pushing through with everything - from school to sports (side note, I did get back on and am finally back cantering, my first jump back is next week!). I don’t want to bring up too much about the times I stayed with you at lunch, but I will forever be grateful for them. I don’t know where I’d be today if I hadn’t reached out and had someone as kind as you listening. I cannot put into words my gratitude and respect towards you, I hope you’re doing okay and wish you a fantastic rest of the year! Thankyou Miss.”
I have it written out already but I have more paper so if I should add/take anything please let me know! :)

I have been dating my girlfriend for only about 2 months, so we are still really new and are getting to know each other more everyday.
We were hanging out this Friday and we started talking about music, I asked her what music she liked and she told me she could play it.
So she did, and I was really surprised. She played some Johnny Cash song and I laughed a little, she asked me what it was and I just said “Johnny Cash? Are you my grandpa or something?” She just turned that song of and I told her to play something else and she played “Bad moon rising”, I know that song because my mom always played that when I was growing up. I laughed again and she looked sad and asked me what was wrong this time. I told her that I thought she had some good taste in music, not the same taste as an old man. She turned it off altogether.
Now these past few days she has been off with me and I am starting to think that this is the reason as to why. But idk really.

Hello all,
I need your advice, I joined a small company last eyar as consultant. My colleague and I are registered from the owners as self employed so they don't have to give us any benefits. My problem is that even though I like the work we do, as well asworking with my colleague, I overpay taxes! I am thinking to leave and look for other opportunities but everybody tells me to stay for more than one year and then look for another position because it doesn't look good to leave in 1 year for my resume. What would you advise me to do? Is it really so bad to leave upon the end of the contract? I am finishing in 4 months and probably they want to keep me working there (I am doing good work), but I can't pay all these taxes, have no insurance or any retirement. Practiacally I feel being robbed. Is it so necessary to be more than 1 year before I decide to move on? Also how I leave without burning the bridges (in case I need then as reference)? I am ears guys!

Around the early 2010s, I had a DVD that my uncle put on some animated shorts that he found on the internet. One in particular was a 3D animation where two cars were racing on what I think was a hill, one of the characters was a man with a shaved head, another was a woman in a skirt, and the driver of the other car was not revealed (at least that's what I remember) the animation wasn't bad but it wasn't very polished, I believe it was a project made by one person in their free time and posted on the internet, or a project made by animation students, or something similar.
But what happens in the animation is the two cars are racing, they pass at high speed near the woman and the wind makes her skirt lift, then something happens to the faceless driver's car (I believe he fell off the hill) , at the end the guy with the shaved head drives back to the woman, and the woman immediately handcuffs the man, the short ends by showing the woman's license revealing that she was a police officer.
That's all I can remember, which is a lot since I must have been 5 years old when I watched this

I recently bought a Tesla MYLR and people constantly question my life choices like it was the biggest mistake ever.
“Have fun waiting 8 hours to charge” “The battery will die at like 40k miles good luck” “What’s the range? 100 miles?” “My stock F150 will take you any day” “It’s so bad for the environment (Fills up 50 gallon truck)” “If you charge at home and it takes forever what happens if you need to leave? I guess you gotta wait 8 hours huh?”
Like are people really this clueless? It takes an ounce of research to know Tesla batteries are pretty consistent and comparable to an ICE life span if not longer, it takes me 30 minutes to charge for $15 for 350 miles and even cheaper if I’m at home (where I’m not driving). People act like you’re driving and living in you car therefore you have to have a full tank every time.
Don’t even get me started on Facebook when an advertisement advertises specially to EV owners and someone chimes in with “NO THANK YOU!” It’s not even a car you own.

29M - USA - 2.5 Months
One concern that I had with the idea of SR when I first began contemplating the topic was that once "charged up" I would begin to behave foolishly concerning my dating prospects, and that the buildup of sexual energy would cause me to simp after women more heavily than if I was depleted, where I perceived I would be able to "play it cool" with girls. This was certainly the case to a significant extent during my initial streaks, and these types of outcomes were an impediment for me to realizing the advantages of SR in my early twenties.
The reason this was initially an issue for me is that the beginning of the beginning, as in, before any streaks longer than a month were accomplished my brain was highly sexualized causing me to behave in a deranged way once the buildup began. This still occurs, and is why in my opinion SR can be detrimental to a successful dating life because it oftentimes pedestalizes the act of sex, which can create a loop of Oxytocin deficiency which I believe is what causes people to enter their 'loner' phase.
I believe the cure for this is to break through successfully in personal endeavors unrelated to sex, which creates positive dopamine associated with elements outside of scoring with the opposite gender. My current realization is that before you're able to see improvements in behavior, there's going to be a dip and your behavior is actually going to get worse in many cases. This is of course referred to as a flatline, the longer you're able to go without O, the less extended flatlines will become with each subsequent streak. I also believe in the elasticity of streaks, for several years ago when I first began this journey I accomplished a 5 month streak, and my overall demeanor became pretty negative. That first 5 month streak was probably the most depressive period of my life, but it was a culmination of reaping what I had sewed for upwards of 10 years prior to that. Therefore, I can't blame the streak itself for this depressive time.
However, it did create some antisocial behaviors that I'm still unlearning and that I didn't have an issue with as much prior to that great streak. For one thing, my internet behavior became far more anonymous, and to this day my social media habits have shifted from representing my real identity through instagram/facebook, to browsing anonymously through reddit, youtube. This shift I believe created a psychological dissociation from my real world social media profiles, and now I have a l higher evel of anxiety about going on Instagram as myself that I consider to be an impediment. Of course, Social Media is generally considered harmful overall, but if the reason I'm not going on it is because of an anxiety, I consider that just as harmful. So that's something I'm working on.
When one goes 'monk mode' for too long, one may begin to cultivate the desire to begin forming attachments to girls again in the future, but find it more challenging to ride that bicycle compared to if they had not allowed the muscle of PUA to atrophy. That being said, re-integrating socially is definitely possible after a long SR streak, and in doing so you'll still possess any SR benefits that you cultivated during a lonersome period. Overall, I'd say the effort to change behaviors and re-invent yourself is more valuable than the loss of social calibration that can occur. I'm speaking on this topic from the experience of being unemployed for 8 months and then being thrust back into a job that required a high volume of person-to-person interactions.
Benefits on this streak:

• Found a new better higher paying job. I've been barbacking at a prominent restaurant for the last 4 months but I finally received a bartending offer at a different quality downtown establishment. I'm using all these adjectives because many restaurants are trash to bartend at, but the new spot is a place I am actually blessed to be working at.
  
• Reconnected with a childhood friend. They're doing quite well in their career and the wellness gained from my SR streak definitely leveled any psychological issues this would have otherwise caused between our friendship.
  
• Polarization with coworkers. Even though I'm sometimes overly aggressive / moody at work, SR positions me to be the person people are talking about rather than a sideline gossiper (this could be in my head, I'm not sure).
  
• Overall sense of optimism and deeper sense of purpose, even if that purpose is struggling to find an outlet.
  
• Physical: muscle growth, low body fat, Improvement in muscle tone, I'm lean af, my hairline is rock solid, teeth haven't been in pain once.
  
• Attraction from females at work, one extremely hot girl put her face right by mine the other day and told her friend who I knew from high school 'yep this guy is good vibes'. Still not cold approaching people outside of work as much as I would like, but people can tell I've got an energy to me
  
• This one girl at work hit me with a pullback and I've overall been handling it like a boss, even though these situations cause a greater sense of despair when on a decent streak, I've gained increased resilience to rejection and have maintained a strong demeanor, and I'm slowly become better at 'spinning plates' than I otherwise would be.
  
• This other girl at work has defended me in multiple instances and generally been supportive of my turbulent period of SR and in over-pursuing this other girl. This bartender was giving me a hard time and I eventually told her to 'chill tf out', she informed the manager. The other girl fist bumped me after she heard about it, and more recently when a manager snapped at me, she later defended me and said she "got my back".
  
• Haven't checked my T levels but I would estimate they have likely doubled based off how I feel.
  
• Resting chad face, the first physical changes that come with longer-term consistent streaks of at least a month over 2 years have certainly caused my jawline to improve and my face to widen. Natural 'mewing'
  
• Disassociation from past identity and sense of self. SR lets me feel that real change is possible. This sometimes manifests as a decrease in tasks/side hustles pursued in a day, but that is because I am consolidated and more conscious of avoiding spreading myself thin in too many directions, the way I would do in the past.
  
• Become capable of saying 'I love you' to my parents, something that we were never able to do for years. Overcame certain mental blocks.
  
• Decreased programming from YouTube & Social Media, I've found myself questioning some of the self-improvement content / general content I consume more than I probably would otherwise. Without SR, I would just be using this type of content to cope & clinging to every word. Greater critical thinking skills & self awareness.
  

The only downsides I've seen are that I have increased cravings for weed, although I've been able to take upwards of 5 days - 2 weeks at a time off. The issue is that with SR I'm able to handle THC and still function in a way I simply wouldn't be able to if I wasn't on a decent streak. I Haven't been as successful with quitting weed as I have with SR yet because I've been dreading the dip in performance that comes with quitting any substance, but I still do find the therapeutic benefits of use to be a silver lining and I feel the discipline I'm cultivating with SR will allow me to effectively quit in the future.
So far, this streak I've been mainly focused on interpersonal dynamics, but today for the first time in a while I was able to go deeper into my own world once again. I grabbed that bull by the horns & wrote this post, and focused on a side hustle.

Ugh, please be nice reddit. I just can't tell with this one.
I joined a social club and met a guy named Ethan (m20) in September. I felt some attraction to him, but was in a long-term relationship at the time, so of course did nothing to act on it. We both took on roles in the club causing us to work closer together around October. I got out of the long term relationship (5 years) in December, and experienced some bad repercussions (stalking, hacked technology, passive threats) by my ex as a result. It was so scary that someone who I saw a legitimate future with turned so cruel and manipulative at the drop of a hat, and though I do not want to go into the extent of everything he did, I should mention affected my schooling, training and permanently ruined my trust in people.
Long story short: Ethan and I admitted feelings in late February. Since he had met my ex and I was still dealing with the tail end of the stalking, I told him about what was going on. When we were talking about the feelings we had for each other, we were laughing over the fact we both believed the other person was out of our league. He also said he pictured me as the type of person he would see himself in a relationship with.
However, I made it clear to him that I do not want a relationship. Though I liked him and wanted to get to know him, I expressed I do not like the idea of relationships right now. He said he had been in many situationships before and was used to them. It didn't have to be anything serious, we could just enjoy each other's company, cuddle, go on dates, have everything be lighthearted.
So, we did that for a while. We dove right into learning about each other and were very upfront about our downfalls. He mentioned he was the jealous type and had been cheated on before, so he feels the need to be overly performative to try and get people to stay. For the second part, I had felt similar in my previous relationship (though my ex hadn't cheated), so I immediately understood what he meant by always having to put on a face for the other person.
While discussing boundaries, Ethan mentioned even during situationships he only ever sees one person at a time and doesn't sleep around. Though we are not together and official, it was an easy tradeoff to just say I wouldn't see other people while he and I were seeing each other--I had no intention to anyway and don't want to do hookups. So, at this point, at his preference, neither of us are planning to see anyone else. I thought that would be it.
Now, a couple of days ago, we were doing a check up on how each of us are doing. I am very happy in our current position--we care about each other, have compatible interests, are sexually compatible and both have been in similar previous relationships and understand what the other has been through. At the same time, it is not so serious that I am worried. He, however, expressed that he still does want a relationship at some point, and went into all that of this with the intention of changing my mind on relationships. He described how the dating phase is like him giving a "sample" of what he would be like as a boyfriend--and this immediately made me wonder how much of this has simply just been him performing.
Here is where I don't know if I'm overreacting: I feel as though he misrepresented what he actually wanted for his own gain. I am greatly struggling with trust since my breakup and for this reason don't know if it's valid that this has affected the trust I had for him. Especially with the "sample" description he's given, I am truly wondering how much he is acting just to try and get me closer. Especially since he knew about the stalking and other scary things my ex did, I had hoped he would feel the need to be upfront and honest with me. I'm meeting up with him on Wednesday to talk about this, and just want to get others opinions on the situation.

I would like to preface this with the fact that i DO think Kenzie is winning. Before yall come for me! Bc i realise any opinion thats not backing up Kenzie winning or supports anyone else winning is “bad edgic” according to yall. But anyways
I wanna explore more of Kenzies flaws and red flags! Just because we only see constant posts about how she is obviously the winner etc etc.
More OTT mean girl vibes than Dee imo in the premerge with Bhanu Jess and Jelinsky. Sloppy obvious social game seen by Q and Tiff (showcased in a neg light by the edit as they highlight them all seeing thru her and it makes her a target). Also even Bhanu sorta gives low-key NSPV - but Bhanu is all over the place i get it. And he does crown her the mermaid dragon of the season.
What are yall talking about? Montage with dodo music and clowns her (literally not needed to be included at all. The edit goes out of its way to dunk on her)
“One of you cant win, you will not get the votes at the end” in jeffs speech. When he says these words it pans on to kenzie. I saw someone spin this as to alluding to her winning.. but like if u watch that scene IMO its actually showing why kenzie wont win and get votes at the end and will lose to a siga member. As siga gets pans of gelling. If she wins i think this was more of a throw us off the scent thing rather than tryin to hint she WINS.
Yanu and their consistant theme of being Losers + tiffany in ep 2. “We are LOSERS” with an immediate pan to kenzie struggle to make a fire
Kenzie saying she needs to blindside tiff for her resume - then NOT getting to do that and losing credit.
Kenzie saying she wants Q out and hes still there
Kenzie saying Venus is my new number 1 and that the boys (ben and charlie) dont wanna boot Q bc they may become bigger targets, but she doesnt wanna boot venus bc thatd apply to her- then proceeds to boot Venus despite the edit suggesting shed vote Q.
Kenzie getting DODO music whilst talking about how poor Venus is at idol searching (a scene coming directly after V finds the idol and says shes pretending to look- therefore highlighting her fooling/outplaying Kenzie) - people say kenzie is redeemed by saying “i guess she may have already found the idol and is bamboozling us all”. - but she contradicts that save immediately by saying “but i think shes just waiting for someone whos close to her to find it”. So she is definitely being bamboozled.
Kenzie also doesnt really have her relationships with Hunter established we are just told shes apparently his number 1 last minute.
The big 6 alliance- we hear kenzie find out about it from Q (she doesnt comment on it) she says “yeh i heard about the 6” implying she found out already about it, yet we still got no mention on the 6 and how she felt about it and being left out, if she was concerned or not about it, etc etc… Charlie we did hear talk about it and accurately immediately call it out for what it was. And yes he was sorta being inducted but it was clearly over by the time that happened really.
Kenzie has no backstory package, not even 1 single outside of the game photo (shes the ONLY player left (in thef10 even) not to and this is despite having had chances already to put it in too) - the emotional blue eye scene, her opening confessional , any time she mentioned her career, her ben panic attack scene. - Charlie and Q had photos. Liz maria and Ben all had full on backstorys. -
When compared to other woman winners - shes insanely overexposed in the edit.
When u look at her game- she actually hasnt gotten THAT much better of a resume or game than Ben or Liz. Its worse than Q Charlie and Maria on paper (outside of pure social) And shes missed the chance for a big move and instead lost numbers in 3 consecutive tribals. Kenzie herself has stated that you need to make a big move - which she keeps failing to do alike jake owen. She wanted Q but begrudgingly accepted Hunter vote, she wanted Q but got blindsided and it was Tiff, she wanted Maria-> then Q but begrudgingly voted Venus. All 3 were numbers that were loyal to her, and she didnt really want out but got them out, having no agency 3 straight votes. And wasnt in the 6 which was the main storyline for the early merge votes.
She has a eerily similar to Jake Owen and Carolyn edit when u really think about it - who all got underdog themes.
also Kenzie is plain wrong a lot… i just rewatched ep 3 and found yet another time shes straight up wrong.. when Bhanu gets back to camp after the journey, he lies to Yanu and says “i chose the white rock” - this is then immediately followed by a confessional of Kenzie falling for his lie saying “of course in typical yanu fashion he gets nothing (correct ik) which works for us because we didnt want him to have anything, he drew the white rock (false, kenzie has fallen for the lie) he doesnt have anything, great for the plan but it is also just hilarious that once again yanu loses another thing (okay sorta correct) and gives something else to the other tribes (false and wrong again). This is yet another really small thing but damn these sorts of wrong things are really adding up. Why gove kenzie that confessional? Contrast that with Tiff basically saying the more on point thing of “the real tea is what did he give up, bc i know damn sure he was over there spilling the tea” and she doesnt have anything falling for his Lie, And then Q doesn't comment on it in confessional, but has a scene where he questions Bhanu if he got the white rock and Bhanu reveals no he didnt and indeed he lost his vote. It again put right after we show bhanu not getting the white rock and the other tribes not getting anything - so even though logically kenzie is just narrating from what she knows, and technically yanu person did lose out, shes still completely wrong about what happened and as a viewer ur inclined to think “thats not what happened” as shes talking. Just this actually has happened quite a lot.
I sound like a Kenzie hater. but end of the day i can still see all of Kenzies upside and Charlies downside and marias danger. I know that a lot of these flaws can be possibly justified or overlooked with all the good stuff - but they still are possible red flags and theres quite a few of them still.. so i think its still worth noting and keeping in mind. Since everyone is constantly pointing out the smaller red flags for a Charlie and a Maria. Just food for thought. Bc if anyone thinks kenzie could be set up for a FTC loss they get roasted on here. I personally do lean towards her winning ftc but the set up is there for both.
I think she takes out Q at least bc the setup for both her (threat mermaid dragon etc) and Charlie (i need to get Q out, Q needs to go asap) has been made. Plus Maria slipped in Q for one more vote, Ben and Liz both have setup for wanting Q gone. Its gotta happen soon! But its entirely possible thats what the mermaid dragon and shes a dangerous threat story arc was leading to.. her being part of tiffany and Q going (her idea the tiff blindside, her making moves on Q). Rather than her necessarily winning.
Ill also point out for those who believe that Charlie wasnt as relevent early on and that he has a poor social game - i just rewatched ep 1-5, skipping thru the nami tribe scenes and challenges and unimportant confessionals (BHANU drama) and BOY do Charlie and Kenzie both get sooo much attention. We hear from both so much. Its kinda clear that kenzie is the main Yanu (sorry Q) and Charlie is the main siga (sorry maria and Ben). But charlie gets so many social related scenes which highlight his social bonds and has the edit backing it up with positive SPV about him from other players. Jeff always talks to charlie and the camera pans are always panning to both Charlie and Kenzie throughout the premerge. Just a little fun thing i noticed.

For the past many many years I have struggled with mental health issues. I have never planned on living long and started planning on ending it at 13ish or so. Multiple times through out the years I kept thinking alright I will give it a few more years and this continued on. This has never really stopped until I met my future wife (we will call her Rayne) at 22 and began to change my outlook to living for her and staying around for her. She also had a rough upbringing and struggles with self doubts like me. So I wanted to "be her rock" and support system.
I decided to stop with and ideas of suicide and we kind of just went with the flow of things for awhile like a normal fresh couple. After about a year or so we decided to move in together to our first apartment. Things were pretty easy going for us. We never really fought or had an argument like we had seen from our parents growing up.
In my past I never would trust anyone and after I would know them for a few months I would lose interest and push them aside for the next fling. I saw a whole new light in Rayne. She changed everything I had ever thought about another person and made me want to be everything I could I for her.
However, I am and was always incredibly manipulative to people I would meet. This is nothing I am proud of by any means but it taught me a lot by testing people's feelings and motives. So I decided to play a string of games on Rayne to test her end game loyalty to me. Ranging from a fake break up to reconnecting with past exes and flings to spark jealously. I would get caught up myself tough in the flirting and find myself drawn into my own game and finding I was fighting temptations.
Which I absolutely would not stand for as I had vowed to myself to never without any possible excuses would I betray Rayne or cheat on her. This would go on for a year or so until we finally would get married once I was sure she was the one. I felt awful for the longest time having played her like this and carry the guilt still. Though we have often discussed the tricking and games and I have never hid who I was to her once this was revealed and our relationship became official. And moving on through the years we would develop a bond like none other we have ever seen. The things I would do for the woman are without comparison. She is and for ever always will be my best and only friend, lover and wife in this and every life we have together. That being said though I still have my past and issues with mental health and self sabotage.
Which I have recently begun seeking out professional help with and have started extensive therapy and medication. However over the years having such a harsh internal struggle I have greatly lost touch with what displays love and compassion for another. As I have mentioned we never fight or have struggles with each other. But lately I have been struggling to just have the energy to smile let alone try and pretend everything is ok in front of her. We will often have a few drinks ever other night to ease the stress and so on to which the most recent occasion has left a scar on my mind. I clearly blacked out and some things happened regarding her phone which reflecting on it seems so silly. I essentially grabbed her phone refusing to give it to her claiming she was messaging someone else. This came as a complete surprise to me when she had told me the next day. I was mortified seeing her expression as she told me what happened and how she explained that I was just plain mean to her. It gutted me that I could ever let myself become like this can treat her so low.
This has left me in a state where I cannot look at myself anymore and need to change drastically. So I have quit all my bad habits of smoking and drinking and am working on weening off THC products. We have both talked many times about the things we would like to do and the places we want to visit and see so I have wanted to stop these things so that we could save more money and just to stop the habits in general.
Long story short..... I am here now looking for peoples input on those moments and experiences that they had where they felt loved and cared for by their partner. I would like ideas on possible dates and inspirational ideas of things we could experiment with and try. Anything would be helpful and great. She had expressed many times before how stressed she is with work but cannot quit and how much she cares for me and loves me but we just cannot find a way to relieve the stress and burden of waking up daily.

I was never this way before. I was so soft, so loving and caring and I was hurt so badly by someone for so many years and now I am just a shell of who I used to be. I hate doing things for others, I don’t care how others are feeling or doing, and I enjoy saying the most evil things to one person in particular, even though it hurts me inside and makes me feel like the worst walking person on planet earth, I can’t stop this and I enjoy it but I hate it and I don’t know who I am anymore or what’s happened to me.

My sweet stumpy miracle passed sometime during the night. I found her this morning before work when I went to check her and change the towels in her enclosure. I don’t know what happened, she just - died. So many of you were so kind to me and I just wanted to say I really appreciate every comment. I tried telling the story at work and was met with odd faces and bad jokes (people who don’t feel that connection with animals are missing out). We’re going to have a little service for her after we tell my son. I didn’t want to ruin his school day and he had occupational therapy after school. I like to think we gave her a peaceful goodbye. The little bit I had her, I just adored her instantly. Her little body was just too tired and injured. 🥺 Anyway, again, thank you all for your kindness. 💔

Alright Nannie’s, we’ve all been there. Bad contracts, no boundaries, weird dynamics. All the strangeness of working in someone’s home and if it’s not a fit for employment? No no no. Bad bad bad.
Well, I have been dealt the Worst™️ nanny families over the last year. I don’t say that lightly, and I happily left after advocating and properly informing agencies.
I interviewed with a family and placed with them immediately. It felt so right. But also too good to be true. However, it’s not. I’ll tell you what happened in an effort to share positivity and the ability to regain faith in humanity.
There I was, THREE TINY DAYS into employment with this family. Both parents were home when I got a call from my mother. It was the news she has breast cancer. This is devastating, and I’ll never wrap my head around it. I called my spouse right after to see if she could calm me down enough to go back into work. But of course when you get the news of your mother’s cancer, “calming down” simply isn’t going to happen. So I took deep breaths and wiped my face and went back inside to my NK and NPs.
I put on a huge smile and went to NK to get lost in her tea party. But, as I walked past, MB stopped in her tracks and said “your voice, are you okay?” I guess my voice cracked when I was walking over to NK.
Legend says nobody makes it through that question without insta-crying. Which was true in this instance. I said nothing, just burst into tears. MB ran over, swept me into a bear hug immediately and said “oh honey what is it?” And I was able to tell her what was going on. Turns out, she works in oncology. (My third day, guys, we hadn’t gotten to what section of medicine they worked in yet).
I now have a nanny family who checks on me and my mom daily, even weekends. Who has offered to see my mom for treatment free of charge if we need to. Who gives me the day off for appointments for my mother.
For a million shit employments, there will always be a unicorn at the end. 🦄

First off let me preface saying I’ve been working in this industry for only about 8 months, no prior trades experience. I worked inspections only for 6 of those months, always with a second tech. Recently, people on service side have been quitting, so they gave me (and I’m not joking) a single 4 hour job with a service guy on his last day to train me. Almost every job I goto is a struggle and it’s lots of reading device manuals trying to ascertain the problem lol.
So, im going to a job tomorrow and would love some input. I’ve got an AES that had a charging cable circuit trouble. Last week I arrived and the battery was dead, outlet that the transformer was plugged into read 120, and the AC power terminal on the board read fine. I guessed maybe a bad battery because I’ve ran into radios showing charging circuit trouble when it’s really just a dead battery. Put a new 12/12 in there and the trouble went away. Called it a day.
So now the battery circuit is back in trouble and I’m going out tomorrow. I feel like maybe the battery terminals on the panel are fucked and are shorting out the battery, making it drain quickly and that’s why it was fine at first when a new battery was put in? Maybe a new radio board on the AES is needed or just swap to an M2M.
Lmk what you guys think.

Ugh, please be nice reddit. I just can't tell with this one.
I joined a social club and met a guy named Ethan (m20) in September. I felt some attraction to him, but was in a long-term relationship at the time, so of course did nothing to act on it. We both took on roles in the club causing us to work closer together around October. I got out of the long term relationship (5 years) in December, and experienced some bad repercussions (stalking, hacked technology, passive threats) by my ex as a result. It was so scary that someone who I saw a legitimate future with turned so cruel and manipulative at the drop of a hat, and though I do not want to go into the extent of everything he did, I should mention affected my schooling, training and permanently ruined my trust in people.
Long story short: Ethan and I admitted feelings in late February. Since he had met my ex and I was still dealing with the tail end of the stalking, I told him about what was going on. When we were talking about the feelings we had for each other, we were laughing over the fact we both believed the other person was out of our league. He also said he pictured me as the type of person he would see himself in a relationship with.
However, I made it clear to him that I do not want a relationship. Though I liked him and wanted to get to know him, I expressed I do not like the idea of relationships right now. He said he had been in many situationships before and was used to them. It didn't have to be anything serious, we could just enjoy each other's company, cuddle, go on dates, have everything be lighthearted.
So, we did that for a while. We dove right into learning about each other and were very upfront about our downfalls. He mentioned he was the jealous type and had been cheated on before, so he feels the need to be overly performative to try and get people to stay. For the second part, I had felt similar in my previous relationship (though my ex hadn't cheated), so I immediately understood what he meant by always having to put on a face for the other person.
While discussing boundaries, Ethan mentioned even during situationships he only ever sees one person at a time and doesn't sleep around. Though we are not together and official, it was an easy tradeoff to just say I wouldn't see other people while he and I were seeing each other--I had no intention to anyway and don't want to do hookups. So, at this point, at his preference, neither of us are planning to see anyone else. I thought that would be it.
Now, a couple of days ago, we were doing a check up on how each of us are doing. I am very happy in our current position--we care about each other, have compatible interests, are sexually compatible and both have been in similar previous relationships and understand what the other has been through. At the same time, it is not so serious that I am worried. He, however, expressed that he still does want a relationship at some point, and went into all that of this with the intention of changing my mind on relationships. He described how the dating phase is like him giving a "sample" of what he would be like as a boyfriend--and this immediately made me wonder how much of this has simply just been him performing.
Here is where I don't know if I'm overreacting: I feel as though he misrepresented what he actually wanted for his own gain. I am greatly struggling with trust since my breakup and for this reason don't know if it's valid that this has affected the trust I had for him. Especially with the "sample" description he's given, I am truly wondering how much he is acting just to try and get me closer. Especially since he knew about the stalking and other scary things my ex did, I had hoped he would feel the need to be upfront and honest with me. I'm meeting up with him on Wednesday to talk about this, but AIO?

The across the street neighbors are spraying tomorrow, if I close the hive tonight will that protect my bees somewhat? It looks like it'll drizzle tomorrow and we'll be upwind of them. My mentor said don't close the hive, but beekeepers have many opinions. If I close it, when do I open? They will spray in the morning. What bad would happen if I closed the hive? They both have internal feeders.

Wanted to start off this post by apologising for any grammar mistakes or sounding erratic.
My boyfriend and I are just in the about to reach our first year anniversary. We both have diagnosed BPD and for the past year I have found a way to free myself from my own struggles without medication. However, it has not been necessarily healthy. I have found that focusing on helping him to feel better has taken my mind completely off of my own issues. He’s recently began actually feeling better and I am now confronted with my own problems. I’ve bottled most things with the intention of sparing his own feelings, and it’s already blown up in his face twice. Each time he was extremely caring and acted in a very securing manner.
I am a very jealous person, that being a byproduct of my bpd. He is well aware, and we have had numerous talks about it but in none of them I have been upset with him. I know he loves me and he knows I love him. I am very vulnerable after sex and while I can usually reason with myself and get myself through my fits of jealousy, I had a harder time doing so this time around.
Now this is going to sound really stupid and dumb, I know, but after sex and after the aftercare he was scrolling through his feed and saw a post from my friend, this is where my jealousy issue comes into play. He uttered something along the lines of how “she always has to make her cool posts weird” I was confused and asked him what he was talking about. He showed me the post and the first photo is very cool it’s a medical school textbook type of photo displaying a full face on one side and then an anatomically correct depiction of a skull on the other side, when he swiped to the next photo in the slide it was just a selfie of her in her bathroom except she’s wearing a low cut top. This made me upset because I didn’t see anything outrageous with her post, so I insisted that it was a photo of her and he was the one making it weird.
He agreed for a second but then asked how he was the one making it weird (playful tone) to which I responded “don’t piss me off” (verbally upset) and he was sort of like “what does that mean” in a playful tone. I didn’t handle it so well, after I said that, I pulled the covers over me and he tried to comfort me by being silly and I kind of just laid there and didn’t vocalise how it made me upset ( 50/59 because I couldn’t logic it out as to why I was upset and because I didn’t want to look crazy ). Still, he tried to cuddle me. Of course we said our goodbyes and he went to work and even though it’s unfair, I still feel bothered.
How do I explain how I feel to my partner without sounding crazy or making him feel bad?

Anyone else out there thinking Taylor and Matty have been a couple MUCH longer than anyone has realized?
I’m certain there are people here much more versed in all this stuff, so please share your thoughts on this.
I don’t know that you could have convinced me a month ago, but then TTPD came out and there was Taylor’s seemingly erratic behavior those first 3 nights at the Paris Eras tour. I’d not thought about it until this ridiculously fake Travis Kelce relationship, but I realized…If Travis isn’t real, what about Joe Alwyn and the others that came before?? So I read into the Matty and Taylor lore online, and really listened to both of their music with a new ear. I think they’ve been speaking to each other and to to US for a long time through their music, telling us they are together and laying out all their love and their strife. Also, it’s possible they really did split up after the 2023 debacle, and Taylor really is trying to get Matty back right now. I mean, her song really says it all “i’mgonnagetyouback”. Still, that doesn’t take away the fact they may have been together for years prior.
It’s possible they have been a couple as far back as the early 2010’s (with at least 1-2 breaks up that they sing about). They both reference a love that they don’t remember how they met, and it’s possible they met at an early event when they both were building their careers. At that early time tho, they were both curating such opposite images of themselves that I’m sure their PR teams were not okay with them as an out couple - Taylor being America’s Sweetheart and Matty being a smoking, drinking rock star heathen. Their PR agents prob told them it was bad for their brands to be public. So into secrecy they went, not predicting that a decade later they’d be still together, much older now and wanting to settle down with each other. But what a tangled PR mess they found themselves because they’d been in hiding so long, and esp so when they rushed Matty out to the public. We all saw how well that went.
There are a lot of lyrics and music videos that elude to their relationship, but it’s the lyrics of the 1975’s song “Roadkill” that really confirmed it for me:
“And they’re playing your song on the radio station “Mugging me off all across the nation “ “If you’ don’t eat, then you’ll never grow” (A line they both share back in forth in different songs “I should’ve learned that quite awhile ago “I know it gets hard sometimes “Making out with people that you don’t like “I know you don’t feel alright…… “You know, I didn’t feel alright “Until you spoke to me “You “I’ve been waiting for you “My whole life, waiting for you
There are a lot of other songs and examples but that one right there really spells out they’re in PR relationships and feeling miserable about it (it was released in 2020 and they were both “In a relationship” at the time, ie in a fake one). It’s actually sad because Matty frequently mentions being in love with someone “his whole life”, and sings “I’ve been in love for ages, I fell in love for her in stages, for ages, my whole life”. If they did start dating around 2011 or so they would have been only been around 21 years old, and that could feel like being in love with your person your whole life.
I am not a Swiftie but I am a 1975 fan and I do like some of TS’s work. But someone out there surely knows more than me on on this. Most fans agree that there are several songs of the 1975 that were written for Taylor, esp on their most recent album. Personally, I think a lot of 1975 songs potentially point to Taylor - hell, most of them really. I listed a few if you’re curious.
Settle Down! Robbers Way Out The City Somebody Mine The Birthday Party Jesus Christ 2005 God Bless America

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/835177904178200618/1239714833558011934/image.png?ex=6643ede9&is=66429c69&hm=4acfe5316887d76abc1d3bdf04a88e2a3476516028bce21d85e040954b32870e&
The wordings a bit vague and he kinda dances around the question. But the genera thing implied is that only one version of Twisting Nether and that the Archimonde who serves as the final boss of WOD is the same from Warcraft 3, and seemingly most if not all demons are the same individuals in all timelines and realties.
Its similar the multiverse singularity idea I've seen in stuff like Marvel and Transformers comics. And I can see how some might be ok with this reveal as it might give the Burning Legion more of this eldritch horror vibe. Or maybe it help simplifies things actually, so we don't have to worry about their being infinite other timelines out there of other Sargerus' going after other worlds. Like the alternate Dreanor being in trouble. Though given the reception of that expansion maybe some fans wouldn't care if it gets destroyed.
But I think it raises to many questions, Nobbel87 already made an IMO good video about this back when it was 1st a thing so forgive me if lot of my points are his too. Like if these are all the same Burning Legion why do they keep going after 'this' timeline. Are there not others where Azaroth have less defenders to take over?
Is the nether also non linear? Has the Archimonde in Hellfire Citadel already done the World tree thing 1st or the otherway round? Funny he never mentions these occasions. I assume Dreanor comes 2nd since high ranking demons can only die in the nether or in places full of fel energy, which is looks like Hellfire Citadel has. And what does this mean for someone like Mannoroth? From his perspective does he go through Warcraft 3, then tries again back in time with WOD only to get killed early by Grommash and then brought back as an undead and die again? He sure has bad luck
But my biggiest point is we gotta remember the legion isn't like traditional demons in stories. Their not like born in a hell. There more like a conglomerate of conquered aliens. What happens to someone requited into the B.l. Every time in a new reality when Argus gets conquered and Kil'Jaden and Archi join do they like...fuse into the many previous versions of themselves into one that has all their memories?
I feel with more controversial retcons from Shadowlands this one has been forgotten about but I'm curious about peoples thoughts on it now

Sorry for how long this is, I've got that ADHD trait where everything feels important for context. I'm also still trying to process everything.
So I (30F) just had my first baby six months ago. My dad passed away 12 years ago and I lost ties to his side of the family, partially because most my uncles (he has 4 brothers) live in different states and partially because my dad was the person to plan everything. So, most of my family I'm in contact with is my mom's family.
Typically, if my family invites me to family events or holidays they do so through my mom or my uncle (mom's brother) texts me or calls me. My mom, though, has been struggling with her mental health since my dad passed and the only people she really talks to are me, my brother (who lives with her), my grandma, and my great aunt. She occasionally interacts with her brother and sister. My grandma is your typical bitter, white, racist old lady and is kind of toxic toward my mom (she belittles my mom's feelings, usually places blame on my mom, plays clear favorites with her kids, etc.). So my mom has dealt with anxiety any time she's going to visit my grandma for holidays or to stay with her if she is having health issues or to watch my aunts house (she lives next door). My grandma lives about an hour from us. My mom lives 5 minutes away from me.
So the last few big holidays my mom didn't want to go to her house because of the anxiety, and as I had a newborn and was recovering from a c section (had the baby 11/19 so a week before Thanksgiving) we decided to do small holidays. For Thanksgiving I invited my mom to come over and she offered to cook Enchiladas (rather than a whole feast - which I was fine with). She brought the food over, her and my brother ate, but I wasn't hungry, yet, so I just hung out. She held the baby for a few minutes, then they both just left after the baby started getting a bit fussy. Didn't offer to help clean up, left the food on the stove (which was on) and left. I was still recovering from surgery and my partner had taken the opportunity to get some sleep since he didn't think I'd need help as my mom was there. So, I couldn't put the food away and just leave my crying newborn baby alone. Not to mention I wasn't stable enough on my feet because of where I was in my recovery. I don't remember what we did for Christmas, she did come by on her own (without my brother) and gave us gifts and hung out with the baby. She also came over one other time for a few hours to watch the baby so me and my partner could get some rest. She was at the hospital when I was in labor and after having the baby but didn't really do much to help except get me food and maybe help change a diaper. When we were discharged I told her not to worry about coming to the hospital but she was welcome to come to our house, but she said she didn't want to intrude and let us adjust to having the baby at home.
I text with my mom every few weeks and it's been clear for years that her depression has gotten pretty bad. If she talks about herself it is incredibly negative, or she is angry with everyone around her. I'm really the only one who sure hasn't been angry with. I've spent the past few years essentially being her only support system (next to my grandma and my brother - who is also battling his own mental health). I've also spent the last few years trying to get her to see a mental health professional.
She finally admitted she needed to address the anger she was having with my grandma and her incredibly low sense of self-worth. Over the last year or so I have been working with her to get her into a therapists office. I've found therapists that I think would be a good fit for her and contacted them on her behalf (I started by just sending her their contact info, but she kept coming up with excuses of why she hasn't, like she forgot to stop into the office of one she wanted to go to that was next to her masseuse or she was too anxious to call because she'll sound like an idiot). She didn't hear anergy back from them (but she also probably just didn't see any emails since her email inbox is so full with spam.) She finally asked her primary to see a psychologist and made an appointment. I texted her a week before mothers day just to check in with her to see how it went. Found out she got scammed (not from the psychologist) and it made her feel like she was dumb and couldn't do anything right. I did what I could do balance the line between comfort and trying to challenge her negative thoughts of herself. We didn't discuss mother's day.
Fast forward to the day before mother's day, my MIL's boyfriend invited me, my partner, our baby, my SIL and their grandma to breakfast on Saturday. (I also want to add, my MIL and her boyfriend watch the baby every weekend, they cleaned our house when I was in the hospital, then they helped us when we came home so I could shower and get check ups set up.) I still didn't hear back from my mom, so I texted her at 10am on Saturday asking if she wanted to go to breakfast on mother's day. During breakfast my MIL asked what I was doing and I told her I was planning to go have breakfast with my mom, but my partner had to work in the afternoon and didn't have anything else planned. I didn't hear anything back from my mom still, so when my MIL texted me that night (around 11pm) saying she wanted to see me to get pictures of me and my son on my first mother's day, I gave her my schedule and she told me to let her know a time in the morning. That night my son was up every two hours, so I didn't get any sleep until my partner took over around 4am. I woke up around 9:30ish and just ended up ordering breakfast. While we were eating we made a plan that while he was at work I would go see his mom and when he gets off we'd go thrifting then go roller skating (because mom's skate free on mother's day). I texted his mom times and everything was set. Then my mom finally texted me back saying happy mothers day and assuming I'd received an email inviting me to go to my grandma's house for mother's day. I had not, and told her. She said apparently I was left off the email my uncles fiance had sent (which she also was the first time - so I was left off multiple emails) and she said that it was an accident and that I was welcome, then asked if I had plans. I didn't think my uncle's fiance left me off intentionally, but I already had plans and told her this. Didn't hear anything for a few hours then realized I forgot to say happy mothers day and sent her another text doing so and that I love her.
I still haven't received back any response. I haven't heard anything from the rest of my family (except my brother on my dad's side who lives in another state and is completely unrelated to this). I did not go to the mother's day thing, I wasn't going to cancel the plans I already made and I wouldn't have had enough time to squeeze in a visit since it was an hour away and an hour back and would've been an all day thing. I'm incredibly disappointed and crushed, and really, really miss my dad. It was my first mother's day and the only one who put any kind of thought into it was my mother in law and my own family - my mom included - seems to consider me an after thought. They're supposed to be the ones to provide support and love through all of this. The janitor from my work sent me a happy mothers day, redditors I chat with who don't even know my fucking name wished me a happy mother's day, someone I just started talking to like 2 days ago wished me a happy mothers day, but my own family couldn't even send a text??? Ouch.
Sorry again for how long this is, I'm just kinda fucked up from the whole thing.

My parents have a history of being lazy and negligent with animals. They had a beagle who only lived outside, and they swore he never needed a bath because he was afraid of water and it would be too stressful for him. They never took him off his lead. They had a lab that they never took outside for a walk who died of a stroke prematurely. They swore she was healthy and well taken care of. Tortoises that are supposed to live for like 100 years have died very early in their care.
So now, they’re down to 2 cats. They’ve let one become obese, and they weren’t sticking to his diet for a while until I got onto them. Who knows if they’re actually doing what they’re supposed to do for him or if they’re just saying they are. And they’ve started smoking in the house again, which means my asthmatic ass can never enter my childhood home, and also the cats are going to suffer.
Any time I mention taking one of the cats, they try to convince me it’s a bad idea. He’s mine, but I couldn’t afford to take him with me when I moved. They promised they’d take care of him. I feel terrible everyday for abandoning him to get myself out of that situation. I’m terrified that they’re slowly killing the cats.

My sister actually used to be quite extremely abusive (telling her to fuck off when she was only 3 years old) and constantly shouting at her non stop and acting so inconvenienced anytime she need anything from her (yes a 3 year old needing her mother).
At this time i actually called social services (like cps but in england) and it turned into worldwar 3 in my family because half of us were on one side and the other half didn't want CPS involved. They got involved but they did basically nothing. Because she wasn't being physically abusive and my niece is somehow by a miracle quite a confident child despite this I think when they visited they were charmed out of it. It's crazy. When I reported her they said they wouldn't inform me of any updates and the rest will be dealt with directly with the mother of the child.
So they reached out the my sister and gave her loads of notice of the visit so she pulled her self together sorted out her home to make sure it was tidy and clean and presented herself so well that I think they just closed the case but I will never know. I later did tell my sister it was me that was involved as we did start talking again when she stopped drinking and I thought that she'd started treating her daughter better but it looks like there are still issues. She told me that they did nothing. This was like 4 years ago now.
I live another city and this year I have seen them both only twice but on both instances I left feeling so uncomfortable and angry with how she still speaks with her. She treats her like the biggest inconvience and irritation and interupts her and treats her in a way that I cannot stand.
I have never been treated like this as a child and still grew up to have major self esteem issues so I am heartbroken to imagine how my innocent little niece will grow up.
I feel so helpless here. Because my dad believes the way things are now are the best they can be and getting social services involved again will just isolate my sister and my niece from the family because she will know it was us again and the social services will probably do nothing again meaning that we will have no involvement in my nieces life making things ten times worse and all for nothing.
I think the confidence my niece manages to hold onto for now is because of the involvement my parents and other siblings have so to jepordise this again with social services feels like a risk that will likely do more damage than good.
My sister is very defensive and in the past when I was assertive with her and confrontational about her behaviour before it even got as bad as it did (when my niece was about 2 years old) she played victim and said that she'd never treat me the way I'm treating her... we didn't speak for a long time because of it. The main reason I am in contact with her is because I want to be able to remain in contact and good relations with my niece. My oldest sister no longer speaks to her at all which is understandable but as a result she has banned my niece from ever having any contact with her.
My new strategy is to spend more time with them and try and spend time with my niece alone so I can pour my love into her and boost her self esteem by showing her the love and respect and playfulness that she deserves to constantly be recieving from her mum and also try and get to the bottom of what is driving this abrasive behaviour from my sister in a caring and supportive way so that I can try and indirectly influence her to being a better parent given the direct approach did not work before.
But the issue is is I am not the most emotionally stable person as I mentioned I suffer with low self esteem myself and have anxiety issues as it is and even being with them for 1 day sent me into a tension headache and rumination hole of thinking of the worst case scenarios for 2 days straight... So it saddens me that I am the only one who seems to be proactively trying to take initiative here and being called to manage such a devastating situation when I myself need to be helped and supported as it is. I am all alone in the world in the sense that I have no partner, no close friends, and am distant to my family due to the fact that I find it very difficult to be around them and they make no effort with me at all and spending time with them literally drives me insane at the best of times.
The last thing I want to do is make this about me - but I do worry that I am genuinely not strong enough to navigate it the way I highlighted above. But I know I need to because I don't think there is any other options :(
This is such a complex scenario and I completely appreciate that Reddit may not have the answers but I am just in desperate need of a perspective that could help.