Hiya,
I have a violent felony from 2020 in CA (on probation, probation is ending this year). I'm caught up with all my requirements (900 hours of volunteering, etc.,). My crime is a wobbler and I'm planning on having a lawyer drop it to a misdemeanor and push to expunge after my probation expires.
That aside, I've been working full-time this entire time while having the crime in tech - my last two roles haven't background checked, which is how I was able to do OK. This role did background check & it's looking like it's caught up on court records. They've delayed my start date three times now (5/20) while they're pending. I'm pretty sure this company will care that I'm a convicted felon and I'm pretty worried about it.
Full disclosure, during the interview/during the application/in the background screening, I was never asked if I committed any crimes so I never had an opportunity to disclose. So I haven't disclosed yet. What do you expect will happen when they get the court records back? Will they likely give me a chance to explain myself & how should I tackle it? Like I've said, I've been employed while on probation after the conviction - and I have letters of recommendation/character references.

So my fiancé and I of 8 years got engaged lst Feb . My friend, Sara, and I have been close friends since we were in high school together and for the past year we have worked together. Before we worked together, I noticed there were things that made me wonder if the friendship was off balance. I’ve made an effort at her implied request to be close with her friends and family, all of whom I’ve gotten to know. Her father passed away 2 years ago and I attended her wake and hosted the get together afterwards at my house. Often times, when we’re in groups I’ve noticed she will have a two way conversation with another person and completely leave me out of the conversation , leaving me to sit there alone despite attempts to join the convo. She is also the kind of person who will dump, then as soon as she is done and you begin to share she will pick up her phone and start texting someone else Recently, since getting engaged these things have become more pronounced. Since wedding planning and festivities started, it became more pronounced that Sara has made no effort to build relationships with my friends or family, all of whom are close. I invited her siblings and friends to my engagement party to simply ensure she was comfortable.
Recently we have both been struggling more at work. Historically, Sara is a person who cares a great deal of what she comes across like to others and I have always done my best to offer support in moments she struggles with a protective person to those I care about and I find that when she expresses feeling slighted me, I React and feel protective of her. This recently happened at work, where in which I defended her to my manager, which resulted in my manager yelling at me and now bullying me to the point where I am now off work on stress leave. Since then, I have been informed by colleagues she has been siding with this manager in this behaviour, biding to her direction for things such as inappropriately writing me down as a no show.
Moving on, I’ve noticed that Sara will get upset with me when she does not get her way, then I will disengage and afterwards she will often send me a text Essentially turning the scenario around and Change the narrative to me being upset and her “understanding”. If I am not supporting the way she expects m to be she will often say something snarky as well
In terms of the wedding, I was speaking with my maid of honour the other day, my sister, and she expressed surprise that Sara was even in the wedding party. She mentioned that Sara has not been involved in any planning whatsoever and she has not spoken in their chat they’ve had for 7 months. The only dialogue Sara is interested in having with me regarding the wedding is about her dress. She has purchased about 13 different dresses, and I have spent probably 14 hours in conversation discussing which dress, all of which I said are great, would look great on day of. I also asked her several months ago to let me know if her partner is coming, which she refuses to answer.
I am at a loss. Every day gets harder with her and frankly I’m feeling really devastated that it’s come to this and that this is the way things have unfolded. This is a friend I care a lot about, and the loss of this friendship will be hard, although I do feel it’s time to part ways.
My challenge is that the bachelorette and wedding is coming in 2 months. How do I navigate this?

The following is an original work of fan fiction. It will only make sense if you’ve read Corpies and SP4
“Fucking bullshit cock-garglers!”, Hannah, formerly known as Hexcellent, uttered louder than she intended.
Luckily, she was sitting by herself in a third floor private room in the brand new wing of the Sizemore undergraduate library. On the main floor, any sound louder than a fart would’ve earned a collective, “shhhhh,” and annoyed stares from half the people studying. And frankly, as difficult as these Gen Chem practice exams were, the former PEERS would be spitting out a few more expletives before she was done.
Hannah glanced at her watch and sighed heavily. It was 4:43 PM. She still had two and a half hours before she’d need to head to the lift to meet Devon and Kacey, two other first year HCP students, for some evening training. Okay, you got this girl. You just fucked up some amped criminal supers, you can handle goddamn mass to mole composition formula and stoichiom-whatever-the-fuck, she thought to herself. With resigned determination, the HCP student began swiping through class presentation slides on her tablet, reviewing problems she had trouble with. For a solid 2 hours her eyes never left the material and she honestly started to feel more comfortable with what she needed to know. Hannah was in the zone. That was until she was interrupted by a knock on the door.
“What. The actual. Fuck?“, Hannah said slowly as she looked up towards the door and the adjacent window.
The summoner saw two boys standing outside , one of whom was a short muscular guy with dark brown hair that she recognized. She was fairly certain his name Lucas, and that he was another HCP first year. He was in the alternative class though, while Hannah was in combat, so they hadn’t been around each other a whole hell of a lot. The other seemed familiar, but she couldn’t put her finger or on where she’d seen him before. They were each moving their mouths, and pointing a finger at themselves and into the room clearly asking if they could come in. Hannah got up and opened the door.
“Hey, Helen, right? You think that we can study in here with you? All the good tables downstairs are full. I just met Tristan here and he’s in the same predicament as me,” said Lucas before he lowered his voice to a whisper, leaned his head in, and pointed to the boy he referred to as Tristan. “He’s in the same ummm…special program as us. In his 2nd year.”
With that information, Helen realized where she’d seen that guy. He was at the freshman party hosted by the second years. She remembered thinking that he came off as kind of a douchebag by the way he was standing around, nursing the same drink with a smug look on his face the whole time.
“Yeah, sure, whatever. As long as you guys dont act like complete assholes and make a bunch of noise. I gotta focus for about another 30 minutes then the room is yours. Cool?”
“Cool,” the boys said in unison.
“And it’s Hannah by the way. Not Helen. You’re Lucas, right?” She held out her hand towards him.
Lucas politely shook her hand. “Sorry about that Hannah. I’m terrible at remembering names,” he said with a slight shrug. “Just gonna grab a seat on this side so I can stay outta your way.” He held out his arm towards the opposite side of the table from where Hannah had been sitting and started walking over there.
Tristan walked in and closed the door behind himself. He gave Hannah a simple head nod and smirk but never formerly introduced himself. Very similar to his demeanor at the party; as though he couldn’t be bothered.
Yep, arrogant douche, she thought. Then she pictured the look of surprise on the 2nd year’s face if she were to manifest her big furry friend to accidentally-on-purpose kick him in the balls.
Hannah had often wondered if anyone in the HCP realized her summon was the same giant bunny that helped save Brewster almost a year ago. Titan had told her the DVA would hide any association between the tower-sized rabbit and her PEERS persona but she figured that once classmates saw her summon for the first time they’d make the connection. That didn’t seem to be the case though, at least as far as she knew. It helped that when she summoned Hopcules these days, he was about the same height and stature as Titan. None of her combat training took place outside yet, so no one in HCP got to see her manifestation at his full potential size. He’d also taken on more humanistic facial expressions lately and had been appearing in a variety of different clothes and accessories. Hell, the last time she trained with Kacey, the hulking rabbit materialized in a denim vest, a blue bandanna on his head, metal spiked leather bracelets around his wrists, brass knuckles, and with gold chains around his neck. Kacey couldn’t stop laughing during their sparring session until Hopcules had her bound and hog tied. Even with her enhanced strength, she couldn’t break free of what evidently weren’t just plain gold necklaces. It hadn’t dawned on Hannah until later that, the night before, she’d fallen asleep to an old 80s action flick about a renegade cop taking on a vicious street gang. She wondered if tonight her childhood protector would show up in a lab coat, holding a periodic table. The Sizemore freshman briefly shook her head to snap herself out of her thoughts and sat down to resume her work. She’d gotten fully back into her study mode until…
“Yo, does sound carry out of this room?” Tristan asked.
“Seriously?! You do remember that whole bit about NOT being obnoxious assholes, right?”Hannah asked incredulously.
“Damn girl chill. I just wanted to ask my guy here a question and didn’t want to risk being overheard. You should smile more girl. You know what I mean?“
Relax. Breathe. You don’t want to be seen as a troublemaker. It would not be a good idea to kick this fucker’s ass while inside of the school library. Or would it be? No. No. Definitely not a good idea, she thought to herself.
“Well unless you two were standing outside of here practicing at being mimes as a back up in case you don’t make it to graduation, I’m pretty sure this room is well insulated to sound.”
Tristan grunted in indignation and sarcastically replied, “you’re hilarious.”
“I’m definitely going all the way through. No way I won’t graduate,” Lucas chimed in, seemingly oblivious to the tension that’d just arisen between the other two people in the room. I’ve known I wanted to be a hero ever since I was little. My parents have spent a fortune sending me to an elite training camp for the last seven summers to make sure I’d be prepared as possible for the HCP. Plus I’ve had personal coaches work with me for years on new ways to use my power.”
“Bro! That’s what I was wanting to ask you about. I saw the logo on on your bag. Holy shit, did you do the SETA training camps?” asked Tristan.
“Yeah, I take it you’ve heard of it.”
“Hell yeah I have. The Super Elite Training Academy. Who hasn’t? I hear those workouts are so intense. No wonder you’re so jacked. You must’ve been in great shape for your first day here. Mad props bro. Is it true you get to fight against human looking robot…”
“Hey! Tweedledum and tweedle-dickless, I honestly didn’t know there was such a thing as a two-man circle jerk, so I really appreciate the show but is there any chance I can get back to work without any more distractions?“
Lucas had mixture surprise and guilt run across his face. He opened his mouth as though he was about to say something, but then glanced over at Tristan and stayed silent.
“What? You mad because you’re realizing you can’t stack up against the competition. Guess what. My guy here isn’t the only one who’s been preparing for this program long before he was admitted. I’ve been getting ready for years too. Trained in jiu-jitsu and boxing on top of honing my super abilities. Have you even done anything? Or did you just apply and cross your fingers?”
Hannah could see where this was going in. She decided in that moment to just let it play out. Fuck it, she thought. She was basically done studying. Even if she failed the final, which she was confident that she wouldn’t, she’d still pass the class. She stood up, pressed an icon on her tablet touchscreen and began putting other things away in her bag while she spoke. “Actually, I never had any special training as a kid. To tell you the truth, I shouldn’t even be here. I got into some trouble years ago. The kind of trouble that normally prevents one from getting admitted into an HCP. But, I was on a PEERs team for years and I got to do a lot of…
“Ha! You’re telling us you’re fucking a Corpie. Can you believe this, dude?“ Tristan nudged Lucas, looking for his agreement. To his credit, Lucas appeared visibly uncomfortable and leaned away from the other boy.
“Don’t know what it says about your class if they’re letting Corpies in,” continued Tristan with a sneer. “I guess you really do need to study. Obviously you’re the one that needs a back up plan. And here’s another thing little girl. It’s not just about how much you’ve trained beforehand, it’s also about who you know. And I know people. My mom‘s best friend is related to the Hero, Unseelie. So I’ve actually met a few Heroes who I’m sure will vouch for me when the time comes. Pity you can’t say the same. We all know Heroes don’t give two shits about Corpies.”
For a moment Hannah’s face expressed a flat affect. Then suddenly she burst into laughter. And not just some derisive laugh as though she was trying to convey to Tristan that she didn’t take his comments seriously. But an eye watering, oxygen depriving, honest to the Gods belly laugh. The kind of laugh that would’ve been contagious had she been around friends. She carried on for a minute until her amusement died down to a just a mild chortle. Hannah wiped her eyes. “You know people?“ She started laughing again, even louder than the first time. “Oh my Gods. Stop. Stop. I can’t breathe. Is this your fucking power?” Hannah was bent over at the waist still laughing hysterically, holding out one finger as to communicate, “give me a second.” After another minute, she wiped her eyes again, took a big gulp of air, and collected herself. “Woooh. Now that was some funny fucking shit.”
“Who in the hell do you think…“ Tristan started to say through gritted teeth.
“No no no. Please don’t get me started again. I don’t think my ribs can take it,“ said Hannah still chuckling some. “Let’s see what have I done and who do I know? You know I always knew that eventually I’d tell people about this, I just didn’t think it would go down like this.” The summoner raised her hand, then slowly curled it into a fist. Standing 3ft tall and leaning into the corner so as not to be visible to anyone who happened to be looking into the room at that moment, was Hopcules, adorned in the same armor he’d worn on the day he helped to save Brewster. “Look familiar to anyone?”
“That looks like the giant rabbit that fought robots with Titan. Hare-a-clees or something like that. My little sister has like 5 of its t-shirts ,” Lucas responded.
“Wow kid, you really are shit with remembering names. Hop-cu-les is the name I gave him when I was just a kid. Surprised the shit outta me that he came out the size of a skyscraper when those robots nearly killed me and my team, ” Hannah stated nonchalantly as she waved her hand and made Hopcules fade away.
With a grudging realization, Tristan began to ask, “wait, you’re not actually saying…”
“Oh look, captain mc-douche-nozzle is catching on. Somebody give the kid a prize. Yes, dumbass, I’m actually saying I fought with Titan, yes, thee fucking Titan, with every other Hero team in Brewster to stop those mechs from destroying the entire city. I’m saying the strongest hero alive is my personal mentor and it was his recommendation that got me into this program.”
Lucas looked back and forth between Hannah and Tristan having already realized that the sophomore might be one of those guys who’d lash out over his perceived inferiority. Lucas was so curious though he had to ask, “but… But, that rabbit is everywhere these days. Not just T-shirts. Toys, a cartoon, and I just read there’s going to be a next-gen console video game based on his character. If you own the rights to that image, you’d be loaded.“
“Eh,” Hannah said with shrug. “Youre leaving out the movie deal Lenny just got for me, but not something I talk about too much . It leaves me enough to be comfortable and to be able to donate a library wing to the university thats giving me a shot at being a hero.” Hannah responded. She gave Tristan a quick wink and glanced over her shoulder towards the door.
Tristan looked in the same direction and noticed something he hadn’t bothered paying attention to before, a small engraving on the center of the door of a bipedal rabbit. This would’ve been the most surprising thing that he’d seen since he set foot in the room if it wasn’t for the photo that appeared on Hannah’s tablet now facing him. It was an image of five people: Graham De Soto, the new head of the DVA, Titan in his iconic Hero costume, Dean Jackson, a large muscular young man with a shit eating grin who Tristan didn’t recognize, and another person in a generic gray mask, presumably female, and wearing a smile of malicious enjoyment, the same as the women standing before him.
Hannah saw what caught his attention and picked up her tablet. “Oh, did you notice this? I love this picture. Titan called me in for back up as a Temporary Emergency Hero Asset. We beat the shit out of a literal army of enhanced criminal supers and took this picture after everything calmed down. All the other HCP deans were there too. Mr. Desoto actually told me if I ever needed a favor, he owed me one.” Hannah wore a wistful expression as she thought back on that day with fondness.
“Anyway, I gotta get outta here. S’posed to meet up with my training partners. Cause no matter what your background is or who you know, no one is a shoe-in for the final 10. Lucas, feel free to meet us in the combat cells tonight if you want to get a work out in and get tired of hanging out with this fuckwad. Later losers!” Hannah said this last part as she turned around and headed towards door while holding up her middle finger for all to see.
Tristan was obviously livid. His hands had been visibly shaking as he stood and listened to all the ways this 1st year had accomplished more than he’d even thought possible for student. Who does this little bitch think she is? She’s full of shit. She has to be. I’ll show her. From his elbows down, Tristan‘s arms began to darken. In seconds the two appendages looked like small tree trunks, with his fingers elongating into barbed tendril-liked branches rapidly moving towards Hannah.
Although Lucas had worked for years to improve his ability to cast his energy based illusionary environments-referred to by one quirky coach in the past as a “holodeck”- speed was an element that he continued to struggle with. He began to cast a simple illusion of darkness, so as to blind Tristan, but he knew almost immediately that it wouldn’t reach him in time. Then, out of the corner of his eye, he saw furry white movement. The miniature Hopcules had reappeared and was running towards the back of the chair Tristan had been sitting in. With a parkour maneuver that would make Jackie Chan jealous, Hopcules leapt from the floor to the chair, then from the chair to the rear wall. He torpedoed off of the wall with the force of both hind paws and made contact Tristan’s head, knocking the arrogant second year to the floor. He laid there dazed and confused about what had just struck him as his branches retracted and his arms returned to normal. The summon vanished before he even touched the ground.
Hannah smiled as she exited the room. Thanks be to the Gods. I was hoping that piece of shit would try something so I could have self-defense as an excuse. Kacey and Devon better be ready. I’m already warmed up.

So recently there's been an issue with me and my mother. I've been an only child growing up and she was pretty strict on me since I was a kid. Even being the quiet kid and trying to stay out of much trouble, and when I did it was scary. I was afraid of her. I've even gotten kicked out of the house twice when I was in my teens for things that shouldn't have blown out of proportion to begin with, she took drastic measures that I don't think any mother would ever take.
Now that I'm 26 years old I still fear for my wellbeing around her, but now it's different because I'm an adult, she likes to twist my arm to get what she wants, she's a very "my way or the highway kind of person"
Recently, in 2021 she took me to a furniture store and had me open a line of credit in MY NAME to get HER furniture that she wanted in her house. With my back to the wall or else I would never hear the end of it, I caved in while she said she would make the payments and take care of it.
Last week. It turns out she hasn't been making payments and I just got served papers to appear in court for small claims from the collection agency, this all happened a day or two before mothers day.
I cussed her out for being irresponsible and how that it was feeling like i was the parent and talking to her like to her like she's the child.
She just called me, claiming she was upset that she didn't get a simple happy mother's day text, in which I did have plans to do something with her but decided not to go through with them as I was currently shitting myself about how I'm gonna come up with twenty thousand dollars (plus attorney fees) if I can't get the case dismissed or come up with another solution.
She fucked me over and now I'm facing the consequences.
I've been sitting here, just baffled.
Is my mother a narcissist?
I don't know if I wanna be around this person who claims to be my mother.

Male 30 6 foot 230
This will be a bit of a long post
So I had an unprovoked blood clot in February, 5 cm greater saphenous vein in my right calf, was put on Eliquis. 2 months later did another ultrasound and they took me off the Eliquis. I requested to see the hematologist, but they came back and said they won’t see me unless I have a second clot. Dumbest thing ever in my opinion, I’m trying to avoid a second clot. But anyways, they send me to vascular medicine who determines that I do not need surgery. So I go off the Eliquis on April 10th, all is well until about a week ago. I slowly feel the familiar pain creeping back in and it’s getting worse every day rather than better. I scheduled an appointment but I can’t be seen until next Friday and I’m going out of town for my sisters wedding for 2 weeks so I won’t even be in town. I called the doctor and explained that I’m having the familiar pain but I don’t want to go to urgent care because the pain is not severe at this point. When I went in before I could barely walk. The nurse told me the doctor was busy and I had to wait till my appointment to talk to her and my triage tells me I need to go to urgent care. I’m not gonna do that because I don’t think imaging will show a significant clot if a clot at all. I still have plenty of Eliquis left over, would it be a good idea to restart this medication just to be on the safe side until I can be seen? I do flooring installation and I’m on my knees all day, I’m wondering if maybe I have some fluid built up behind my knee that’s maybe blocking blood flow to that region. If I had a clotting disorder I would think I would have a clot in a different area not the exact same spot but this is just a hunch of mine? Good idea to start back 5 mg Eliquis 2x daily and see if the pain goes away?

I am currently working on a medsurg floor and my director suggested every nurse take the RN-BC and said “Will look better on your resume”. I'm thinking about becoming a critical care nurse in a year so how likely will I use the RN-BC certification? And if I want to study for the test, what will be the best resources to study for it? Thank you so much for your help.

Hey guys
I'm 5 months pregnant and due in September. I'm a 23 YO girl who just got out of homelessness. I am in credit card debt, my score falls more and more each day, and I suffer from a range of mental illnesses (Depression, bipolar -doctors suspect, still need tests ran to confirm -ADHD, OCD, and anxiety)
I just got back into school, and I'm getting used to "being a student" again. Surprisingly, I'm doing very well - I actually graduated with the top of my class back in high school, so academics are something that have always come easy to me. As far as employment, I work an extremely part time job as of now and barely get any hours in. Before I went back to school, I was a notorious job hopper, mostly due to personal life reasons but a few reasons being job performance and anger out bursts + rage quitting at work.
before discovering how dysfunctional and incapable of fitting into society I was - it has always been a dream of mine to be a mom. I feel like I come from a very broken and estranged family, so being able to find/create a family of my own has always been the goal.
I have calmed down and started working on myself a few months before discovering I was pregnant. I plan on getting on medication as soon as my son arrives and I am actively looking for CBT therapists to hopefully help me become functional again. My patience has gotten better and my anger issues are also improving.
When I was a homeless dancer, I was on drugs (coke, alcohol, adderall, and made some wreckless and impulsive decisions, especially concerning my sexual safety). I slept with 4 guys, but all wore condoms except 2. I would have to request a paternity test from both of them to confirm who the father is, but the guy I really suspect is a long time FWB I had long before becoming homeless. I slept with him to get coke.
That should tell you enough about the mental aptitude of me and the father. He's actually in a good place financially and could help out with co-parenting but he's made it clear he doesn't want to be a father and even told me to go get an abortion even though I'm 5 months in.
I don't want to be associated with either of those two guys after my son is born.
I can't even afford my OBGYN visits - I have to figure out how to meet the deductible for my insurance company or I have to call an adoption agency and find a family who's willing to cover my labor and OBGYN appointments. I also heard horror stories of new borns being taken from their birth mother immediately after labor and I already know myself and know I wouldn't handle a situation like that. I would like to have AT LEAST 30 minutes of holding my baby or spending a few days in the hospital with him before he's taken from me.
I've convinced myself that if I were to put my son up for adoption, he would come back in my life but that is no guarantee. I'm convinced my financial situation will improve though, and I do think my mental health will be a lot better within the next 5 years but those are no guarantee either. With or without my child, I want to improve my life and I can feel myself never going back to what I was before. My plans are to get a job working assistant admin by next year since I'll have my associates, pay my credit card debt off, and by the time I graduate with my bachelor's, I hope I can land a better paying admin job.
I already know once my son is here, and if I have to give him up for adoption, I'll live everyday with a bitter and broken heart. I was already kind of detached and cold and felt so spiteful and bitter about the world before he came, when I have to give him up, I know I'll be hurt yet again by the world, but at the same time I would love with soooo much relief knowing he's in the hands of a loving two parent home with all the resources he needs. And if something happens with the adoption/foster care system, I pray I'll be in a better financial situation by then and let him come back home.

It is well known that being outside in the sun can improve your health and skin by means of improving mood, and vitamin D synthesis. While everyone knows too much sun is bad for the skin (sunburn, carcinoma), I propose that the right amount of sun exposure can improve acne/texture/pigmentation in a short timeframe. Additionally I believe this effect is not related to improved mood or vitamin D.
I first observed this phenomenon after being outside for 30 min. Upon looking in a mirror, I noticed observable improvements to my skin compared to before going outside. These observations included smoother skin appearance and skin texture. I then began to take 2000IU of vitamin D per day to try and recreate this effect. While this moderately improved my health/skin, It did not have the same effect as simply being outside for 30 minutes. This leads me to believe that something in the sun, potentially the antibacterial effect of UV rays, or sun induced exfoliation, improves the skin. I plan to do a more "scientific" experiment to figure out to what extent daily sun exposure can help acne.
Questions: Has anyone else observed this same phenomenon from being outside? Can this effect (either the antibacterial or exfoliative mechanism) be reproduced in some way via skin care, and have the same effect as simply being in the sun?
Details: M20, east asian, 9 months on tazarotene 0.045%

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Hello, my grandma has just gotten a spinal fusion and I’ve been helping take care of her for most of the days since her injury. The first ER she went to apparently only scanned her head and hip after she missed the last step on the stairs and sent us home saying “she’s fine with no fractures or brain bleeding” after a week of bed rest at home we took her to a different ER after a week of no improvement only to find out she had a burst fracture on her T12 vertebrae and it was pressing on her spinal cord. No numbness or loss of feeling anywhere thankfully. She had her fusion 6 days ago and is at a nursing home for PT right now but one thing that worries me is how when she’s falling asleep I can see either her hands or legs twitch and it just started yesterday. She also has osteoporosis and the dr described it as similar to drilling into particle board so I’m afraid of when I help her move because I don’t want to rip out the rods on accident or anything like that. Are there any valuable resources anyone has found in either taking care of themselves or others after this surgery? My mom had a fusion as well but that was when I was a child so I can’t say I remember any of that and it feels so different anyway as there’s a huge age difference for them in surgery ages. Any help or insight would be appreciated as I want to be able to help my grandma in any way possible because it hurts to see her in so much pain

Hi everyone, hope you're well if you're reading this, and apologies for the long post.
I'm a white European guy (36) and have been with my Indian Fiancé (31) (originally from Kerala) for nearly 4 years now. Very much in love, and our relationship is nearly perfect when we are together. She has struggled with anxiety and depression for some time now, and it's reached an all time low now.
I'm sure you've probably guessed from the above sentence alone, but I was asked to be okay with keeping the relationship a secret from her parents and community, and I went along with this despite, honestly, seeing it as ludicrous. It was hand waived away as a cultural difference by my partner, and she was happy to keep the status quo for a while.
When we got engaged, she obviously told her parents, and the reaction was somewhat dramatic - I'm sure again, that if you're reading this, you can probably guess the events and behaviours without me going into them.
I wrote her family a letter, introducing myself and asking for their blessing, saying that I was looking forward to meeting them - this was met with further hostility. I'm a big believer in tackling problems head on, and wanted to simply knock on their door and have a conversation, but I was begged not to by my fiancé.
Life continued with its usual ups and downs, with attempts at interference by her cousins (one saying she should leave as I'm not Indian, another saying that a long-term illness I was suffering with meant she should leave me - the irony in two men who regularly cheat on their wives and families giving relationship advice about a couple they'd never met was somewhat funny), again I was begged not to say anything and I complied despite my anger at this.
I love her dearly, and would do near anything for her, and it breaks my heart to see her struggling with her mental health, things have gotten much worse recently.
Last week, out of nowhere, we had a call (she's currently in India with her mother), and she was completely broken and tried to break up with me, with no reason given. There's no other man, she still loves me, but "this is the best decision for her right now", said through sobs - I disagreed completely, I've been in enough relationships to know when things are going wrong and coming to an end, and we'd just spent a weekend together madly in love and having a great time. We spoke about getting her some more therapy, and our plans for the future etc., so this conversation came as quite a blow - I agreed to give her some time & space, and quite honestly, after this conversation I needed the same, I was so bitterly disappointed. Take away all of the family nonsense, and this is a near perfect relationship being chipped away at by utter bullshit.
I then made a decision (after consulting several of my own friends and family) - I love this woman, and I'm not giving up without a fight, if the relationship dies then at least I did what I felt was the right thing to do.
I wanted to just get the worst of her anxieties dealt with, something I should have done years ago. I decided after a few days of space, to go and meet her community at their church , and from there, I'd bring lunch around to her Dad and have a civilised conversation about everything - I didn't want her involved in the decision as I knew she'd back down and give in to fear.
I attended their service (asking for permission from the clergy to do so), was respectful, and met very many lovely people, I came away from this with an invite to a kids baptism, several phone numbers of new friends, and all around it was a great time, they wouldn't let me leave and were very hospitable. I ensured that I was humble, but was honest when asked who I knew there, and my reasons for attending (stating that my partner was worried I wouldn't fit it, and I was going to surprise her by having already been).
I then went and spoke with her father, who again, was very kind and gentle, we shared a laugh over several things, I apologised for my part in not meeting them sooner, but said that I'd had enough of the secrecy and would love to get to know the family better, and have bygones be bygones, I also apologised for turning up unannounced, that it wasn't my intent to be disrespectful and was in fact the opposite - so far so good.
My partner called me a few hours later, initially a little annoyed with me, but soon realised I was doing this to support her, and she thanked me for being 'courageous', and we reconciled, reaffirming our relationship and love for one another.
Cut to today, and again she's in massive amounts of turmoil, apparently despite the outward appearances of kindness, members of her community have been 'shaming' the mother who is hugely embarrassed by my actions (I'm in my late thirties, I don't need anyone's permission to go anywhere, nor do I think what I did was embarrassing at all), and is now exerting more pressure on my fiancé due to the shame of what I've done (I feel absolutely no shame for this). We haven't broken up, and I kept reasserting that, if we communicate, there's nothing we can't get past.
I feel that all of this is absolutely insane - I treat their daughter always with kindness, respect and love, have plans for a very wholesome future, have a great career, look after my own parents very well, etc., but I can't win for losing.
I show some guts, and its deemed as 'outrageous'. I stay quiet, and I still lose. I'm getting tired of dealing with this bullshit, I'm too old to be worried about what other people think of my relationship (that they know nothing about aside from my skin colour being different to my partners). But I do care deeply about my partner, she's everything to me.
I'm looking for advise from anyone who's been in a similar situation, my gut instinct is telling me I need to confront her mother when she returns as I feel it's about time that we all acted like rational adults about this, but I fear my fiancé is too fragile to cope with this. In the meantime, I'm trying to source a decent therapist for her, as I fear she nearing crisis point with her mental health (regardless if we end up apart, I want her to be well).
TL;DR: Indian fiancés parents and community interfering in my relationship with her, I can't seem to make any headway, advice and experience sought.
Thanks for reading friends!

Sorry for the rant, this just happened and I feel numb but I don't know who in my actual life to talk to about this.
I've been dating my international student girlfriend since December 2023. She's from a poor background, and I was drawn to her passion for political activism, hoping to grow in that area myself. Recently, her PCOS symptoms have worsened, affecting her health, but she's buried under activism and PhD work, barely able to care for herself. I've been supporting her by giving her my credit card for Ubers and food delivery, cooking for her occasionally, and covering whatever works I can for her, but our interactions have become mostly work.
We've had a few big fights, especially in April and May. During a conference in Hawaii, she asked me to ask her a question as an audience member but didn't specify. In trying to pay attention and think of a good question, I missed a text asking for a photo, and she berated me for hours, calling me privileged and incompetent and a manchild who needs to be spoonfed. She later apologized, and things seemed to improve for a few weeks.
Cut to a month later , on mother's Day I had plans to spend the day with my fam. However at the last minute she told me she needed me to come to a protest and bring food. I cooked until midnight the night before, made an excuse to my mom and spent the day driving back and forth between my parents and my gf. At 11:30 that night she asked me to drop off some groceries along with some medicine and a check.
To give you context on the check right before the Hawaii fight she asked to live together in september. I had concerns so I said I didn't want to yet. However she said given her finances this would really help. She asked how I could claim to love her when I wouldn't compromise to help her. I ended up compromising by offering to just pay her rent for the next year but live alone. This comes out to roughly 18k. I'm not rich. I am an engineer with decent savings so this wouldn't financially cripple me but it is definitely eating into my house down payment savings.
Anyways when I dropped off the stuff I made a joke about not getting any good pictures of her at the protest and she blew up at me about how I'm incompetent and making no strides to improve myself. This criticism extended to my hobbies like pub trivia and board game nights, which she deemed frivolous and a sign of my privilege to choose not to spend that time studying the political issues especially calling me a psychopath for doing this when a genocide is happening.
I felt cold and told her I don't plan to give up my frivolous activities. She called me an asshole but I said I don't care and just left. She blocked me on instagram. I don't know if it's explicitly a breakup but it feels like it.
I'm conflicted about how my decision might impact her, considering her health, financial situation, and lack of a support system in California. I'm unsure if I should have waited until she was better or back in her home country to end things?

So, here are my thoughts about how I intend to connect the two campaigns based on feedback here and my own thoughts.
The central idea here is that Kas has the same goals, of disrupting Vecna, but needs Vecna to be nearly done with the ritual before supplanting him. In order to do this, he actually needs the obelisk completed because I am working that Vecna is leveraging the secrets/power of the obelisks as a portion of his fuel for the ritual.
A large change in Phandelver and Below, is that Vecna is actually posing as Ilvaash to manipulate the Mind Flayer fanatics into completing the obelisk. The mind flayer fanatics will all be missing their left hands as a nod to Vecna, and any images of Ilvaash the party sees will showcase the godlet missing a left eye, with some other scarring to not make it too obvious (although it doesn't matter if it is).

1. Chapter 6: Introduction of Kas
   • Encounter at Talhundereth: The party encounters Kas, who is seemingly in a desperate situation with a mind flayer. The party intervenes and "rescues" him. Kas introduces himself as a knowledgeable figure with information on the mind flayer threat, claiming that gathering the remaining obelisk pieces is crucial to preventing a greater catastrophe (the establishment of a new Illithid empire). Essentially, they must complete it so they can "destroy" it, otherwise even in a partial state it is still useful.
   • Building Trust: Kas uses his charm and knowledge to earn the heroes' trust. He will play a role similar to Gwyn Orseong, providing critical information while holding back his full power. He already has the Crown of Lies, ensuring his deception is not obvious.
2. Chapter 7: Gathering the Obelisk Pieces
   • Guidance and Manipulation: Kas continues to guide the heroes, providing critical assistance in Illithinoch. He leads them through the stronghold, helping retrieve the obelisk pieces, all while subtly steering them towards actions that ensure the ritual progresses as needed.
3. Chapter 8: The Betrayal
   • Confrontation and Betrayal: As the party confronts the mind flayer fanatics to destroy the obelisk, Kas reveals his true allegiance. He actively betrays the party, ensuring the obelisk's completion by fighting alongside the fanatics. This amps up the difficulty of the fight, making it more rewarding when the party eventually destroys the obelisk and the fanatics. During the entire fight the obelisk will be "pulsing" with energy that seems to be doing something but is not apparent. Kas will get "thrown" into the obelisks and appear to disintegrate from the power, but in reality, he is just teleporting away.
4. Aftermath and Deception
   • False Victory: The party returns to Phandalin, seeing positive effects from destroying the obelisk. They believe they have thwarted the Illithid empire's plans, unaware that the real goal was to complete the obelisk so Vecna could siphon its power, getting Kas one step closer to defeating Vecna and ruling everything.
   • Setting Up the Next Campaign: This sets the stage for "Eve of Ruin," where the party will discover that Vecna, posing as Ilvaash, manipulated them all along. Additionally, when Kas is revealed to have manipulated things as a "secret" Mordenkainen, it will be a juicier reveal since they already know that Kas got one over on them already.

This approach ties Kas’ goals with Vecna’s plan, making it believable that Kas needs the ritual to progress to a certain point before he can make his move. The players will experience a sense of victory, only to later discover that they inadvertently furthered Vecna’s plans, setting up a compelling continuation.
Eve of Ruin Changes:
I think how Kas got the Crown of Lies is largely irrelevant.
I do not plan to involve the "Dark Powers" at all. While in the greater canon of D&D this may matter to people, for this campaign it's irrelevant to me that he was in a Domain of Dread and then escaped. Not knowing "how" he escaped I think adds some mystery to his character and provides a great example of just how powerful he is.
The PCs will find out from the Wizards Three how Vecna was able to get so far, speaking about how he has been having his cult gather power and knowledge for him, in addition to siphoning power from the old Nethrese obelisks scattered across Faerun. The plot of Phandelver and Below will be something the Wizards Three understand during their research of Vecna's plot and machinations, so this will create some guilt on the PCs behalf as they realize what happened and what they contributed to.
The Wish: The Wish is for a method to prevent Vecna from completing his ritual, which is what causes the PCs to be involved. Why can't the Wizards Three simply be the ones to do this? First, they trust magic, which means they trust the solution of the characters even if they are a little confused at that outcome at first. Second, "Kasenkainen" doesn't want them to defeat Vecna. He needs a way to defeat Vecna, which the Rod of Seven Parts will do. Third, in my campaign a deity and its power cannot be affected directly by the Wish spell, so the original wish to erode the power of his secrets in the book is irrelevant and it also prevents anyone from messing with any deities with the Wish spell or using it directly in the final battle with Vecna.
The Rod and the Chime: I am getting rid of the Chime from the story and combining its ability with a super-powered version of the Banishment spell (only able to be cast when fully completed). This special version of a banishment spell will harness all of the artifact's power along with the power of whoever it is targeting, and if the creature is at 50 or fewer hitpoints it will be banished forever. The process of doing this actually strips the creature of its own power, which is what narratively reduces Vecna from a deity status to something less. Where Vecna ends up and in what condition will be open ended. Additionally doing this causes the Rod to shatter into seven pieces again and teleport to unknown locations. Therefore, doing this will create an impossible scenario. The players will know of this and see it as the obvious solution to their problem. I don't need to narratively explain where the Rod pieces go or where Vecna ends up, as I don't plan to "reuse" him in the future at all.
Defeating Kas: Anywhere the "chime" was intended to be used, will require them to simply defeat the being now. Again, don't care if he's gone as I don't plan to reuse him.
Sword of Kas: I do plan on this being in the campaign, actually found in Barovia. Instead of Death House I intend to have them venture into part of Castle Ravenloft, so the Strahd angle is more consistent and can use him more effectively. The Sword will be found there, a great treasure in addition to the rod piece.
Race for the Rod: During the search for the Rod pieces, given the relationship between the Rod and Miska, the spyder-fiends will constantly be harassing the party and trying to get the pieces as well. This is a false flag, Kas having the spyder-fiends harass the party to keep them on the hunt constantly. This harassment is an element from the original 2nd edition Rod of Seven Parts campaign I actually enjoyed when I ran it decades ago. It also creates chaos and amps up the lethalness.
Sigil: The party will actually need to travel to the appropriate parts of Sigil to get to the different planes. This will put them into the right general area once they find the right portal keys, but in each chapter, they will need to figure out precisely "where" they need to go. I'm doing this because frankly, Sigil is badass and needs to be featured more. Plus, if they survive, level 20 characters would likely be a little more present in Sigil as demi-god level adventures might start there or travel through there.
The Generals: I intend to require the party to defeat both generals, Camlash and Miska. While this seems like a lot, It will take the long-rest period between both fights for Miska to fully emerge, so that will prevent things from going stupid in that period of time.
I am still unhappy with the Tiamat portion, but I have to workshop that still.

Sorry if this may be a silly dilemma, but i’m not sure if i have the right thinking. I am about to enter my senior year in nursing school, hoping to start in ICU after graduation. Recently I applied for a competitive critical care externship in the ICU at an academic hospital tied to my university and received it. However, the requirements that came with it consisted of teching during the school year on a contingent basis, having a senior capstone on that unit, and being a potential highly desired candidate hired into the unit which requires a two year commitment. I accepted this position because I had no problems with the requirements. However, I spoke with one of my classmates who declined the position after discussing how she doesn’t know if she wants to stay here after graduating. She expressed this to the externship coordinator who told her that if she accepted the extern position but decided not to accept the hospital position if offered the job, she would be “red flagged”. This alarmed me because I didnt interpret the position as a “guaranteed” hired situation, and nothing was signed for that to be indicated. Now i’m worried that if I decide to move after graduating, i’ll get red flagged, my externship experience would be for nothing, and that a reference from them would be a poor one if trying to get hired elsewhere. Am I wrong to assume that because of this externship, I am not binded to this hospital? Would I be wrong to not take the job position if offered because I want to relocate? I just find it weird that you would be red flagged and you don’t even know if you enjoy the specialty, unit culture, or hospital culture.

21(I think) male (or at least amab) I'm not sure what to write but I wanna post something so I'm just vomiting some thoughts until I post or delete my draft again.
I'm not sure if I'm actually suicidal, or mentally ill at all but I think that's just the illness gaslighting me.
I know that I don't actually wanna die and it's fixable somehow but it feels so unrealistic. It's getting worse for the past few weeks/months and I know that I was happy to be alive before and probably will be when my depressive episode is over.
I know that I won't kill myself but I'm sad about that. a few weeks ago, I had a random wave of motivation so I visited the social worker at my school and got a list of therapists to call and a little script so I know what and how to say it (social anxiety) but I haven't done anything and my motivation is gone again. just asked a friend to call for me, maybe that's getting anywhere.
but I cannot imagine that it helps. right now, on an emotional level, I have no hope that it's getting better.
no hope for therapy, no courage to kill myself, it's a stalemate. I noticed that I care less about the future, so I live more and more like it's my last day and then have to deal with the consequences the next day. i stopped showering, brushing my teeth, eating healthy, i constantly go to bed way too late even tho I'm extremely tired all the time. it's not like I can't sleep, I just refuse to try.
maybe I just try to get more and more miserable until I'm finally able to kill myself.
I'm porn addicted and keep relapsing since my breakup one and a half months ago. I'm a feminist and hate the porn industry but I kinda stopped caring? I don't know if I could stop if I cared more or if I'm just addicted severely enough that I'm actually unable to.
I feel like I'm not allowed to feel this bad. I don't deserve depression, if you know what I mean. I didn't get traumatized (or just don't realize?), I was a social outcast but I have friends now, I don't struggle with money, in fact I am very privileged because my parents have a lot of money.
I do struggle with every day tasks tho (I think I have autism, adhd or both), maybe that's enough to hate being alive?
my original plan was a train, but I don't really wanna traumatize an innocent train conductor so maybe od? but I barely managed to get my hands on weed, I don't think I'm able to acquire lethal medications. also thought about guns, but I wouldn't know where to get those either. I recently read an autopsy report of someone who killed themselves by swallowing sodium hydroxide and it said that they died a few hours after digestion, even tho I'm a chemistry nerd, that sounds a bit too painful for a coward like me.
when I was in middle school, I spend some time on a suicide note but now I'm just tired of living so I don't bother with that, too much effort.
I think that my emotional bond with friends and family is the only thing keeping me alive, but maybe I'd still be too incompetent if I was alone.

AITA for not wanting to share my graduation party? Okay, for background, my graduation ceremony is this week and i graduated with a 4.5 GPA. I received my diploma in Dec of 2023 as I ‘graduated early’ thereby also not receiving any cords for my achievements as they were invalidated by the district. My brother also just graduated this past week (that will be important please note). I have worked full time since the day i received my diploma until now, I give a portion of my paychecks to my parents as a way to help out. As of late, i took off a few weeks from work so that I would have the chance to breathe and prepare for my next steps in life. My parents, the very second i got on vacation, have been throwing me into plans without asking me, having me set up my graduation party and make every group outing happen. (there i’ll be 20+ people for the outings) Now, on to why i mentioned my brother, after having been graduated for a week and already having a party for him, my brother is also being added to my party. the reasoning behind this is because “he deserves to be celebrated too,” when i haven’t be celebrated at all. for the last 18 years of my life, never once have i had a day that was JUST about me. this was the one day that i wanted, i’ve expressed this to my parents and i have no idea what to say anymore because they simply don’t care. I have said that i’d rather just not attend my party and have it be about him if he needs to be celebrated. I have to be clear that i have become more distant and quiet as of late due to this, my mother is still pushing me to be joyful. i am very much on the edge of punching someone. am i being selfish? i just need some advice i guess. thank you

Working moms: I (33F) have a 10 month old with my (45M) husband. My husband and I have been married one year. He works a typical 8-4 schedule. He also sometimes has to travel for 2-7 days at a time out of state, probably every other month. We split household expenses 50/50. We have no savings.
Since getting out of very severe episode of postpartum depression (6-month mark), I was able to renew my spirit and create a small business for myself doing something I love - accounting. Previous to pregnancy, I was a small business owner in marketing, which I hated and will never go back to. When I work hard, I see great success and prosperity follow. I've had it in me since I was a little girl. This year so far, I have been able to network and grow my business to getting over $100k in contracted billable hours for the year. My schedule is all over the place, but always within the hours of 8am-9pm. Ideally, I'd probably work 50 hours.
My husband says he is feeling lonely that he does not see his wife. He's requesting I only work during his work hours of M-F 8-4, as he needs at least a couple hours of quality time with me every day, and does not like the idea of me working more than a few hours on the weekend, even though it is all from home. I've never been around this. The couples I grew up around were all highly successful in their careers (and marriages). He talked so proudly about his go-getter wife before we had a child, and never cared that we spent time apart. I'm realizing it is not time with me he is wanting - but time being childfree. I never thought this would be an issue but it is becoming clear we have divergent value systems. My earning potential is unlimited and I'm the only one with the tools to help us save and bring in more money. I see it as a necessity for me to work hours outside of when he works.
We go to bed together every night, and even if I continue to hustle hard, this would remain true. When I am working, it is at my desk in the family room, where he watches our child. I still do all of the grocery shopping, meal planning, and night wake ups. I've only been working at this for a few months, and he is reacting quite egregiously to it. The most he is "stuck babysitting" our kid while I work is a few hours. I've had to consider getting a babysitter while I need to work from home occasionally, since he says he feels like he's just watching the kid. He wants to spend any time we spend together just watching TV. I'd rather be working, he never wants to spend any free time working on goals or learning something. I've found it's something I absolutely cannot live without.
Working moms or breadwinner moms - how often do you give your husband uninterrupted time? Do you schedule your work around his? What does supporting YOUR goals look like in your household?

I lied but who has the right to be upset? Like no you don't look fat kind if lie
I have had a casual relationship with a woman for a few years. I admit to giving mixed signals. she has asked about why I've changed and I don't k8nd of answer. I just say nothing has changed.
She asked me to come over on a night I had plans. I told her I was going to be with my daughter. She was fine.
A few days later she called me and told me she was upset that I lied to her. That I could have said I just had plans as she doesn't care. But that simple lie made her feel disrespected.
I got mad because I don't know how she knew and was she in my business. I suspect since we aren't friends on Facebook that it was a mutual friend that she saw me in a picture but I don't know.
I told her off but said I'd talk soon and haven't bothered. I know she cares alot about me butif she truly did she would have kept her mouth shut.
So am I right Tobe pissed or is she right to feel disrespected

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AITA for breaking up with my girlfriend when it will likely effect her health and wellbeing
I've been dating my international student girlfriend since December 2023. She's from a poor background, and I was drawn to her passion for political activism, hoping to grow in that area myself. Recently, her PCOS symptoms have worsened, affecting her health, but she's buried under activism and PhD work, barely able to care for herself. I've been supporting her by giving her my credit card for Ubers and food delivery, cooking for her occasionally, and covering whatever works I can for her, but our interactions have become mostly work.
We've had a few big fights, especially in April and May. During a conference in Hawaii, she asked me to ask her a question as an audience member but didn't specify. In trying to pay attention and think of a good question, I missed a text asking for a photo, and she berated me for hours, calling me privileged and incompetent and a manchild who needs to be spoonfed. She later apologized, and things seemed to improve for a few weeks.
Cut to a month later , on mother's Day I had plans to spend the day with my fam. However at the last minute she told me she needed me to come to a protest and bring food. I cooked until midnight the night before, made an excuse to my mom and spent the day driving back and forth between my parents and my gf. At 11:30 that night she asked me to drop off some groceries along with some medicine and a check.
To give you context on the check right before the Hawaii fight she asked to live together in september. I had concerns so I said I didn't want to yet. However she said given her finances this would really help. She asked how I could claim to love her when I wouldn't compromise to help her. I ended up compromising by offering to just pay her rent for the next year but live alone. This comes out to roughly 18k. I'm not rich. I am an engineer with decent savings so this wouldn't financially cripple me but it is definitely eating into my house down payment savings.
Anyways when I dropped off the stuff I made a joke about not getting any good pictures of her at the protest and she blew up at me about how I'm incompetent and making no strides to improve myself. This criticism extended to my hobbies like pub trivia and board game nights, which she deemed frivolous and a sign of my privilege to choose not to spend that time studying the political issues especially calling me a psychopath for doing this when a genocide is happening.
I felt cold and told her I don't plan to give up my frivolous activities. She called me an asshole but I said I don't care and just left. She blocked me on instagram. I don't know if it's explicitly a breakup but it feels like it.
I'm conflicted about how my decision might impact her, considering her health, financial situation, and lack of a support system in California. I'm unsure if I should have waited until she was better or back in her home country to end things. Am I the asshole for choosing to breakup right now when it might materially hurt her.

1) Will this be your first dog? If not, what experience do you have owning/training dogs?

• Yes it’ll be my first pet. I never owned or trained a dog before.

2) Do you have a preference for rescuing a dog vs. going through a reputable breeder?

• I prefer rescue.

3) Describe your ideal dog.

• Low energy, friendly with strangers, can come with me on walks/runs

4) What breeds or types of dogs are you interested in and why?

• Great Pyrenees- gentle giants Rottweilers

5) What sorts of things would you like to train your dog to do?

• def AKC Good Citizen Certificate,

6) Do you want to compete with your dog in a sport (e.g. agility, obedience, rally) or use your dog for a form of work (e.g. hunting, herding, livestock guarding)? If so, how much experience do you have with this work/sport?

• no

Care Commitments
7) How long do you want to devote to training, playing with, or otherwise interacting with your dog each day?

• i can train/play/interact everyday during puppy phase then hopefully it’ll become a bit more independent

8) How long can you exercise your dog each day, on average? What sorts of exercise are you planning to give your dog regularly and does that include using a dog park?

• i hope to exercise with my dog by going on walks/runs twice a day for at least a mile. I can take my dog to dog parks

9) How much regular brushing are you willing to do? Are you open to trimming hair, cleaning ears, or doing other grooming at home? If not, would you be willing to pay a professional to do it regularly?

• i dont mind. Whatever the dog needs

Personal Preferences
10) What size dog are you looking for?

• large! Bigger than a golden retriever but smaller than a great dane

11) How much shedding, barking, and slobber can you handle?

• dont mind shedding, or barking. Preferring little slobber

12) How important is being able to let your dog off-leash in an unfenced area?

• somewhat important. I want to trust my dog not to be aggressive towards people or other animals

Dog Personality and Behavior
13) Do you want a snuggly dog or one that prefers some personal space?

• mix of both? Doesnt mind snuggles but not a clingy dog

14) Would you prefer a dog that wants to do its own thing or one that’s more eager-to-please?

• eager to please but not attached to my hip

15) How would you prefer your dog to respond to someone knocking on the door or entering your yard? How would you prefer your dog to greet strangers or visitors?

• alert for noise by barking but calms down when greeting vistors

16) Are you willing to manage a dog that is aggressive to other dogs?

• no bc idk how to either

17) Are there any other behaviors you can’t deal with or want to avoid?

• aggression of any nature

Lifestyle
18) How often and how long will the dog be left alone?

• alone for at least 4-5 hours a day during the week.

19) What are the dog-related preferences of other people in the house and what will be their involvement in caring for the dog?

• just me caring for the dog

20) Do you have other pets or are you planning on having other pets? What breed or type of animal are they?

• i dont have any pets right now but i plan to have at least 2 dogs so they can be friendos

21) Will the dog be interacting with children regularly?

• no children

22) Do you rent or plan to rent in the future? If applicable, what breed or weight restrictions are on your current lease?

• no restrictions

23) What city or country do you live in and are you aware of any laws banning certain breeds?

• LA

24) What is the average temperature of a typical summer and winter day where you live?

• can get to high 80s close to 90s in the summer. For winter lowest is like mid 60s

Additional Information and Questions
25) Please provide any additional information you feel may be relevant.

• i want my dog to work as a therapy dog. I know its dependent on temperament and not breed but hopefully its easily trainable

26) Feel free to ask any questions below.