Hello everyone from down under. I'm a UK guy currently living in Australia, looking for a penpal to talk to about our day to day, lifes comings and goings and everything else in between.
I'm interested in sport, particularly football, tennis, gym, running and working out. I'm also very interested in music, and would welcome any spotify suggestions. I like rock n roll, indie and anything with a cool guitar solo. I am also learning guitar in my spare time. I also like travel and have just ticked off my 25th country. I like animals and have a big fluffy dog.
I work throughout the week in a professional job and like to chill out in my spare time. I'm friendly and chatty and would like to exchange messages as and when we can. No rules on when you reply, just as long as you do :)
Feel free to drop me a chat request introducing yourself. I am open to anyone and everyone.

Reflections... Sometimes my letters are reflections, capturing our little world. Which, despite us not being together romantically, I'm so happy to say exists. We have a world, you and me. We make a world, just us, where we laugh, fake argue (bc we have to because we don't have real arguments 🥲), think about each other. The world which has all of the things we've watched together, alone. All the slight touches and glanced from across the room. A world that has our whole history and a world which expands the very every single day we say hi. Just as a preface... I love our world! Time to reflect.
A couple of days ago i slipped. You caught me at one of those moments where my brain-mouth filter gets overwhelmed by my urge for you boiling inside and what i feel just comes out (no puns! Stop looking for one!!! 🤭).
We were talking about tension building, and i got so overwhelmed i blurted out something like... "Tension is built in the space between us which keeps me from tearing you apart". 😭 Which, when i realized what i said, i first thought, yo that's cool af 😆... But then immediately had to cover it up.
I wonder if you knew that was meant for you? I wonder if you also knew that it just came out, completely original off the top. 🤣🤣🤣 So original i was honestly shocked that i said it. You're not stupid I'm sure you know...
I wonder if you find it cute that sometimes i can't contain myself so much that it just happens. Like when i moved to sleep next to you. As a side note i hope you know there was no funny business. I swear i just felt a pull so strong i had to go sleep next to you. It was the only way i felt ok again. Literally like a magnet that is now at rest because the Attraction to the other magnet is complete. The two not being able to get any closer. 😊
977 days of talking to you every day since that trip where we finally reconnected for real. 977 days I love you. 977 days and my body literally rejects the Idea of missing even 1.
Good morning love. Love? Doesn't even cut it... Good morning my soul 💌
🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪🦝

CHAPTER 9 – ENTROPY
DATE: MARCH 10th, 7 A.U. (AFTER UNIFICATION) LOCATION: SOL SYSTEM, ABOARD UTRN INDOMITABLE WILL
CAPTAIN HENRY O’TOOLE
"Ah, there you are Commander. Your message said there was something you wanted to talk with me about, right?" Henry asked as his executive officer approached the system map.
“Aye Captain, now's a good a time as any. As you know, the rate of disciplinary incidents has more than tripled in the last two weeks. We've had six fistfights, one near strangling, a few dozen counts of sexual harassment amongst different parties, and a few more incidents of a nature that I would rather not get into for fear of derailing the point of this conversation. I need additional resources to allocate towards ship internal security. With your permission, I'd like to borrow some of our more trusted marines to help the MA's out on their off shifts.” Commander Alvarez asked.
“Yeah, of course, take what you need to nip this in the bud. I can't say I'm entirely surprised; we expected a certain amount of this with the stresses of FTL travel. With everyone cooped up like this, maybe we should brainstorm some new outlets for the crew. Were there any specific incidents I need to get involved with?” Henry replied as he looked up from the list of updates and reports on his own console.
“No, I have it covered. It's just the regs state I need to ask permission to use marines for internal security matters.” The Commander waved it off.
“Excellent, continue to keep me in the loop then. Can I ask you a question?” Henry took the opportunity to ask something that had been bothering him.
“You just did. Hah! Just kidding, put the axe away boy! Now what would you like to know?” He said with a twinkle in his eye.
“I've seen your file, well, the parts that weren’t redacted anyway. If anything, I should be taking your orders! I mean, you're the Space Wolf! Nobody came even close to the number of ships captured or destroyed than you in the early days of the battle for the belt. Why would they want me to be captain when they had someone like you coming along the whole time? Why aren't you a captain anymore? By all right this should be your command, not mine.” Henry asked, after taking one last look around to verify they were still alone around the system map.
Commander Alvarez seemed stunned for a moment before he settled into a more pensive look.
“Listen, son, you're all full of the vigor and high passions of youth. By that I mean you've got a certain fire and aggression in you, yet I've seen you keep it balanced by wit and wisdom. You are a perfect match for the job, even if you could use some more real world experience. With some guidance, you'll do just fine, if you can keep strict standards for yourself and crew and a cool head when things get tough. I... got a lot of damn good men and women killed in an impossible situation when we lost the Michigan-II, and I never truly got over it. No amount of medals, captured enemy ships, or the fact that I've saved many more lives than I lost can make up for that. I finally found peace with that, but that peace required that I relieve myself of any chance of future command. My legacy, for better or worse, is set in stone. Joining this expedition gives me another chance at adjusting the scales without breaking my former vows, even if the only people who will ever know it are here on the voyage with us.”
“So, you claim you have no aims or desires for leadership, but here you are a mere heartbeat away from it.” Henry said, carefully studying his executive officer's every reaction.
“My time for glory is mostly gone, yours is at your feet before you. To the world, I am retired in comfort and isolation. In reality you have me here to help make your will law. You can relax. I already turned down command of this expedition. I was plan A, why do you think they had to scramble to find you? I will take command of this mission only if you are incapable of doing so yourself, Sir. In the meantime, let my experience and whatever wisdom I can offer guide you.”
An emergency alert snapped both of their attention out of their conversation. "There's a fire in one of the officer's cabins?!" Henry’s pulse quickened as he referenced the map to find which one.
“Fuck, it started in Chantal’s room!” Henry said, horrified.
“I've got the CIC under control. Go on and get her, I'll ensure help is on the way!”
“Thank you, Commander.” Henry called back over his shoulder as he rushed for the quick lift.
The officer cabins were the in the very next deck overhead, so he was able to arrive quickly and break into a sprint. The ship shifted as it dodged some antimatter, causing Henry to slip and scramble back to his feet. As he rounded the corner he saw her door was closed and the keypad powered was off. He could hear thumps and muffled screaming from within the room.
"HANG ON CHANTAL, I'M COMING!" Henry shouted in the hope that she could hear him as he pried at the manual override panel.
Two modified Paladin exo-combat armor suits rounded the corner seconds later with a hospitalman trailing behind pushing a medical cart.
"WE'LL TAKE IT FROM HERE, SIR." A speaker-amplified voice spoke from behind him.
One of the Paladin suits accessed the manual control override and forced the door open enough for the other suit to reach in and pry it the rest of the way open as smoke plumed into the corridor. The second suit charged into the room with its flood lights on as a water cannon mounted on the right wrist sprayed flame retardant from a pack on its back. The first suit abandoned the door control and entered, emerging moments later with Chantal awake and coughing from inside the darkened door frame. She was quickly ushered into cleaner air, set gently down, wrapped in a blanket, and was quickly attended to by a hospitalman who began to check her vitals.
Relief flooded Henry’s mind as his adrenaline surge broke against the wall of worry he had built up during his mad dash from the CIC.
“Baby you came for me! I honestly thought I was going to die for a moment in there." She pulled him into a tight embrace as she wept in cathartic release.
"Of course I did! I couldn't stand to lose you, especially not over something like this. So, what the hell happened in there?"
"Well you know me, I was all burning the midnight oil and then I smelled smoke! Then there were some sparks, the outlet pops then whoosh! My computer station and my desk are all ablaze along with half my notes, then the damned door wouldn't work! I had to drop to the floor under the smoke and pound on the door in hopes that someone would hear me. God, it was horrible... I don't think I've ever been so scared in my life." She replied with a deep shudder.
"You're safe now, it's going to be alright."
"I know, but what about my work?" She replied with a forlorn look back at her smoke damaged room.
"What about your work?"
"As you know, I lost a ton of it just now, but what’s worse is I don't even have the ability to recover them! Remember how I lost my backup drive last week? Like, I know I packed it and it is not here anywhere! It’s like some sick cosmic joke on me or something. Sorry! Gotta keep it positive, girl! I get to rethink my last few weeks’ worth of work from scratch... that was almost positive! I probably have most of this recoverable from email sent box backups. Fuck, what do you do if there's no good silver lining?” Chantal bemoaned.
Henry couldn’t help himself but laugh for a second, while his girlfriend stared at him, waiting for a response.
“I’m sorry, is this funny to you or something?”
“No, no of course not. This might be one of those times where the only silver lining is that you're alive. Plus, if anyone can remember and rebuild their notes, you can." Henry smiled down at her.
“Fine, fine, at least I am alive. I was only breathing smoke for a few seconds after all.” She said, rolling her eyes. “Thank you for rushing down here right away anyway, it means a lot. You're amazing, you know.”
Henry smiled, slightly uncomfortable for a moment, so he changed the subject.
“I do my best... Anyway, it seems like these electrical issues seem to be getting worse instead of better. Whatever patch these clowns have slapped on my ship to get her to pass inspection is clearly coming undone. What do you think is going on here?” Henry asked in mild exasperation.
“Honestly, I can’t tell you without digging into the systems myself, which I would rather avoid. My plate is full enough as it is right now, especially having to reproduce so much of my own work now. This ship has kilometers of power cables running throughout it, after all, and you have an entire loyal, capable team down there in electrical, so it should only be a matter of time before they sort it out for you. Let them do their jobs without harassing them too much, please?”
Henry felt a little irked at her for not giving him credit to know not to go overboard, but he stowed it, seeing as she was right.
“The crew has been under a lot of stress, too, having technical issues with the lights going out, or losing power to workstations. More than a few people have tried to convince me to turn us around and return to S33 for a more in-depth refit and repair cycle before we try the mission again. So far, everyone has accepted the fact that we are not turning back now without much argument, but I fear what may happen if these issues are seen as getting worse. Our orders are clear, though, we must continue the journey.” Henry said, uncomfortable with the implications, even if he didn't dare voice it.
“You should get on the Q-Comm to report the fire to S33. Maybe they will order us back to base after this.” She offered, looking for a solution to an impossible problem.
“Good idea, at least the Q-Comm is still working. It’s incredible to me those particles maintained their entanglement once we passed through the baryonic barrier. That alone has been a huge morale boost, being able to contact home base with no time lag.” Henry replied.
“It’s incredible to you because you only have a basic grasp of the science, hon. But that’s alright, very few people truly understand it. That’s in part what you have me here for anyway. Einstein called the effect spooky action from a distance; I always liked that line.”
Henry ran his fingers through his hair and looked at Chantal, with a shake of his head and a smile.
“Listen, Henry, I just had a crazy stressful experience and I need to unwind. Plus, I haven’t slept in almost a day, so I am bone tired. Let’s go to bed, huh? What do you say doc, am I clear to go?” Chantal asked.
The hospitalman closed her eyes and shook her head before responding. "Yes, you are cleared to rest, only to rest, do you understand me?"
Chantal mouthed a thank you before she took Henry by the hand and led him off to the captain’s quarters. Henry felt no desire to fight it, nor flaw with her reasoning. Sleep sounded good, really good. Plus, he was about an hour from the start of his sleep shift anyway, and Alvarez had the CIC well covered. The lights flickered again, but Henry very purposefully ignored it.
“Hey, since we have a little time and we are both a little wound up, Why don’t we take a shower together real quick?” She said with genuine enthusiasm and a wink.
“Madam, I like the way you think.” The couple raced just a bit faster than regulations would have liked, and arrived at his door in record speed. Inside the room they fell upon each other in great passion and need, stripping each other out of their BDU’s and underclothes. Henry tossed a giggling Chantal onto the bed, kissing her neck and nibbling on her ear causing her to purr in anticipation before he moved down her chest, past her navel, and then eagerly began to move his kisses in between her thighs.
“Hah…. I haven’t showered. Are you sure? Oooookay! I think…. Hah…. Okay.” She said breathlessly as Henry began to work his tongue until she began to shiver and squirm before she cried out and melted in his mouth.
“Enough, please, I can’t take it anymore! Just fuck me already!” Chantal pulled herself together enough to beg for it. Henry stood rigid and ready and set himself to granting her request, first slowly, and with a growing intensity. She once more began to squirm as he paid close attention to her hip’s cues, knowing very well by now what she liked.
As she climaxed again, Henry lifted her from the bed and pushed her up against the wall, and then bent her over his desk for a bit before he could take it no longer and they finished together.
“Holy shit… my legs aren’t gonna work for a bit after that one. Help me up?” Chantal said in between shallow breaths.
“Yes, ma’am. It would be my pleasure.” Henry said as he helped her to her feet and into the shower, staying in longer than was strictly necessary.
Henry left the steam first, once more thankful that his cabin included its own small bathroom, rather than a communal one. Being captain had its perks, after all. He grabbed a towel and wrapped it around his waist, then handed another to Chantal who gratefully accepted it before it dropped to the ground as she stared straight past him.
“Henry!" She squeaked as she pointed past him.
"What?" Henry asked, confused.
"Henry, someone was in here!”
On their bathroom mirror, wiped from the steam were the words TURN BACK.
Henry's blood ran cold and his adrenaline spiked him into overdrive. He waved Chantal back into the shower and put his finger to his lips. She nodded then wrapped herself in her retrieved towel and dropped to the shower floor with her arms wrapped around her knees, whimpering slightly. Henry moved silently along the wall, watching the visible half of his room for any movement. He then burst round the door frame, only to find everything perfectly, precisely as they had left it. The shock of finding nothing collided with the spike of his adrenaline surge, which only fed his growing unease.
“There’s nobody here!” Henry called out after checking the closet, the only other place someone could have hidden.
“Did you lock the door?” Chantal asked, her mind already working on the mystery.
“I set the security protocol to auto lock every time it closes.”
“Paul. We need to talk to Paul.” Chantal said, squeezing her BDU’s up over her hips with a few hops. Henry pulled on his undershirt before tossing over hers.
“Why would we want to bring that weasel into this?” Henry asked, incredulous at to how he could possibly help.
“Because he has access to the surveillance tapes, why else?”
Henry stared at Chantal, brimming with rage, trying his hardest to keep it isolated to Paul over the invasion of his privacy.
“Did you just say surveillance tapes!?!” Henry asked in an icy tone. “That does it, I’m going to strangle him.” Henry said, moving with a purpose toward the door.
“Stop. Turn around and give me a kiss. I already disabled the video cameras, at least all the ones I could find. He has audio at best, even that I doubt. What he does have that I want is the data from the motion sensor that he had installed just in case you found the more obvious bugs. Unfortunately, I sabotaged its effectiveness by blocking the sensor with dense foam, but there might be enough of something to give us a clue."
“How in the hell do you know about all of this anyway, and why the hell didn’t you tell me?!” Henry roared.
“This entire enterprise is run by an intelligence agency; how can you not have seen that one coming a mile away? I have gotten very good at catching bugs over the years. Just because I expect the invasion of privacy to be happening, doesn’t mean I have to make it easy on them.” She replied firmly while staring him in the eyes with raised eyebrows.
“You’re incredible, I love you.” Henry blurted out before he could catch himself. Chantal beamed and tackled him to the bed sitting on his lap.
“What took you so long? Never mind, don’t answer that. I love you too, I have wanted to say that one for a while now.”
“You know these things aren’t easy for me. I had to be sure, I also didn’t want to mess anything up. We need to be able to work together even if we had turned out to be a bad couple.” Henry admitted, Chantal made an show as she thought it over, but she then smiled and helped Henry to his feet.
“Alright, my captain. You speak great wisdom. While I have certainly felt, and thoroughly enjoyed, the depths of your passion, it is really nice to hear about it too. I do think it makes it all the better that you rule said passion with reason. It’s one of the many things I love about you.” She said, laying her hand over his heart.
Henry took her other hand and kissed it before replying. “I think above all, I wanted to make sure that I didn’t take you for granted, nor suffer the same in reverse. A wise woman once gave me some great advice there that I have taken to heart.”
“Okay, Romeo, maybe you have a better handle on these things than you think. Now… Let’s go interrogate Paul.” Chantal had a fire in her eyes that Henry was loving very much at that moment.
“I have wanted to turn the screws on that spook for a while now.” Henry smiled as he spoke, and he opened up the connection to the ship’s intranet through his neural implant to send a message.
MEET ME IN YOUR QUARTERS IN 5 MINUTES FOR A DISCUSSION OF CRITICAL IMPORTANCE – CPT. O'TOOLE
“That ought to get him there and alone.” Henry smirked. “Let’s go.”
Together, they made their way to Paul’s equivalent-sized quarters, which he had somehow secured for himself in the ship design to help facilitate his role as the official thorn in Henry’s paw. I guess being the captain’s handler has its perks as well. Henry’s eye twitched at the corner.
After making them wait far too long, Paul opened the door and gesturing them inside. The door closed and Paul turned towards them, narrowing his eyes, studying them both.
“Is this about the fire?” Paul asked before Henry punched the weasel right in the diaphragm, forcing him to gasp for air. The look of shock on his face as he bent forwards was priceless.
“What the fuck, Henry!?” Paul managed to choke out after a minute between gasps.
“Relax, I didn’t do any permanent damage, yet.” Henry said, Paul for just a second showed actual fear in his eyes before he sneered in defiance. “Oh? That got your attention, did it? Why were you spying on me?” Henry growled.
Paul closed his eyes, dropped his head, and began to laugh before Henry grabbed him by the throat and slammed him into the wall. Foolishly, Paul even then kept laughing amidst the gasping. So Henry squeezed until Paul started slapping his arm, looking genuine fear once more growing across his face.
“Orders… I was following orders!” Paul managed to say amidst gasps and coughs.
“I thought it might be something like that. You're going to open up those files, now, and you're going to show me everything.” Henry said, dropping him to his feet at last.
“Fucking hell, Henry, I thought you of all people would have anticipated this was going to be the case. Do you think the people who made this all possible would simply let you fly around the most dangerous, advanced warship in human history without some insurance?”
“Don’t try and weasel out of your own personal culpability here. You may also want to think back to other people who were “only following orders” while performing acts they knew were wrong before you wave that line around like some get out of jail free card.” The fact that he had nothing to say spoke volumes.
“You should have told me Paul.” Henry growled.
“That defeats the purpose! Plus, your girlfriend sabotaged them all before we ever left S33 anyway, and once more after! That type of tech doesn’t just grow on trees you know, and I don’t have an unlimited supply. You should be thanking me for covering for her and reporting back like things are normal!” Paul shouted in indignation.
“This is pointless, show me the files from around fifteen minutes ago, motion trackers, thermals, anything you have that's not blocked or sabotaged.” Henry commanded. Paul’s eyes narrowed, but after a long moment he huffed and closed his eyes. Paul then sat down at his station and fired it up.
“Like I said, I've got practically nothing. No video, muffled audio and readings from what I assume to be a faulty motion sensor, that’s it. What are we looking for?”
“Chantal and I were, well, together. After we got out of the shower we saw that someone had written turn back in the condensation on the bathroom mirror. Only problem? My door auto locks when closed and only opens for my biometrics. That is why all of this even came up in the first place.”
“Motherfucker. That's a whole heap of bad news.” Paul said. Henry merely nodded, paying rather more attention to the screen to see if he could catch Paul in a lie about the extent of the spying.
“There’s nothing. No disturbances in the air that would even remotely resemble human movement between you two getting in the shower and you charging into your bedroom. With the noise of the shower and the distance to the microphone, there is nothing I can discern that is anomalous. You can see it all right here for yourself.”
Henry found himself even more confused and alarmed than before.
“How is that possible? Look again, run through some filters or something. There must be some evidence somewhere!”
“Alright, relax, I will get to work on this and get you a report by the end of C shift. In the meantime, you look like a mess. Get some sleep man! I can take care of it from here. Oh, and I want you to remember that I forgave you quite magnanimously for that little episode back there where you attacked me.” Henry and Chantal gave each other a look as Paul spoke.
“Wasn’t gonna apologize anyway, you had it coming. I’m going to hit the rack. I expect that report to be detailed and ready when I get up.” Henry took Chantal by the hand, and they left together, not waiting for a response.
“What a snake. Did you see him in there? Zero guilt or recognition whatsoever about spying like that. It just makes my skin crawl. Gives me bad memories.” Chantal said, turning pensive and quiet.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Henry asked, seeing that there was something clearly bothering her.
“I… had an uncle that lived with us from time to time and he would spy on me when I was dressing, try and sneak looks in the shower, stuff like that. Never touched me or anyone else that I know of, thank god, but man did it screw me up a bit still. Played havoc with my sense of security and even my sanity, never being quite sure it was real. I wish I had said something, but I was afraid everyone would think I was overreacting or imagining it. I saw it in his eyes though, that look of... predatory lust. At least I didn't see anything like that in Paul's eyes. To this day it makes my skin crawl.”
“Good God, I can see how alone you must have felt in the middle of all that.” He squeezed her hand, she smiled up at him.
“Yeah, that was one of the hardest parts. I don’t think Paul is some raging pervert or anything, but it concerns me how normal it was to him. Even if he isn’t being a creep with it, as if we can take his claims to be covering for me at face value. There is still no way I am going to let him have easy access to intimate videos of us, if I can possibly help it.” Chantal said before adding, “I’ll be all right, don’t worry about me. Let’s just get some sleep.”
Henry put his palm against the biometric scanner outside his room and the door slid open for them. They definitely needed some sleep after the emotional roller coaster of the past few hours, and the irresistible warm embrace of his bed called for him. The Q-Comm report could wait until he woke, he decided. Better to have the electrical inspection done too.
I WANT A FULL REPORT AND INSPECTION PERFORMED ON THE ELECTRICAL FIRE IN CHANTAL’S ROOM BY THE START OF A SHIFT. – CAPT. O'TOOLE
Good enough. Henry thought as he sent the message. Now he could sleep. The chief would handle it.
SEVERAL HOURS LATER…
DATE : MARCH 10th, 7 A.U. LOCATION: SOL SYSTEM, ABOARD UTRN INDOMITABLE WILL
FIREMAN APPRENTICE SARAH CALLAHAN
It'll be back again tonight...
Sarah’s haunted thoughts repeated like a mantra. She had to be ready, but how? Her skin crawled and itched, the long sleeves of her BDU’s prevented her from being able to do anything about the painful sensation from the inflamed scratches they hid. She blearily rubbed at her sunken eyes, and she drained the rest of her coffee. All the numbers on the screen had started bleeding in together and her eyes hurt horribly, with the throbbing pain in her abdomen only compounding her misery.
“My god, Sarah, you look a wreck, hon. How have you been sleeping?” Yvonne, her shift partner asked, with concern in her voice.
“I have a monster tension headache, if the meds are going to kick in, I hope it’s soon. Can you check my math? I need to get out of these white lights for a few minutes. Close my eyes for a bit, something, anything. I've been having nightmares again.” Sarah felt good, being able to admit it, and Yvonne had long since proven her friendship, so it was easier to actually speak.
“Yeah, no prob. As soon as I am done here I will check your readings and we can get out of here. Do you mean nightmares from the invasion?” Yvonne asked, carefully picking her words and tone.
“Kind of the same general themes, but different. Everything is going wrong, like the worst possible outcomes of my worst nightmares are all combining together. Like, it feels malicious, I don't know, its hard to explain...” Sarah said, bleakly.
“That’s hard, I am sorry. You need a shower, and an uninterrupted nap. Sleep deprivation plays all kinds of hell on the body and mind. I had a friend who went through an insomniac phase so extreme he would go days without sleeping. Wound up in the hospital after trying to drive to work while hallucinating his dead fiancée was sitting in the passenger seat screaming at him to watch out. Wound up rear-ending the car in front of him. Thank God he lived to tell the tale, but that is why it worries me to see you like this.” Yvonne planted her hand on Sarah’s shoulder as she told the story.
“Yikes, I think I slept like two hours into my sleep shift before I started having the nightmares again, woke up, and passed in and out of some restless sleep. It got really bad around oh three hundred. There were sounds... noises like scratching and a loud bang, and the shadows were moving. I just kept feeling like I was being watched, but everyone else seemed to be having disturbed sleep in their bunks. God, it was a creepy feeling.” Sarah took a moment to compose herself.
“I know how crazy this will sound, maybe that I am sleep deprived and likely hallucinating like your friend, but just hear me out. There was something there Yvonne, in the dark at the edge of perception, I could feel it. I also know I wasn’t the only one tossing and turning either. I could also hear scratchy whispering, too. I just hid, strapped in under the weighted blanket. At some point I slept some more, I must have, but not for what felt like a few stressful and draining hours. I'm just making a total mess of explaining this, aren’t I?”
“No, you're fine, girl! I am sorry that happened, my dorm has been pretty quiet, but I have always slept like a rock. Is there anything I can do?”
“I could use a hug.” Sarah said, which caused Yvonne to laugh, breaking some of the tension. They embraced warmly for a good minute, which did wonders for relieving some of the headache and her black mood.
“Thanks, Yvonne, I know it’s all in my head and it’s a vicious feedback cycle due to lack of quality sleep. Thanks for listening without calling me crazy.“ Sarah said, shying away from the last thing she hadn’t the courage to say.
She didn’t dare mention how she had hidden under the covers as she felt it get near. How she had felt something pushing on the mattress. How as her fear peaked, she herself peeked over the covers to find nothing there just to have the oppressive feeling evaporate along with the sensation of pressure by her feet. Her dorm mates all seemed to stop stirring after that, and only then did the nightmares stop for her that night. By then she was left with barely enough time for one last short sleep cycle before the start of A shift that very morning. This was a secret she would have to keep to herself, nobody would believe her anyway.
“I think I'll ask the Chief for a break from my duties today to rest and to visit med bay. Maybe they can give me something to help catch back up on my sleep.” Sarah said.
“Good idea, can I come with? I’ll back you up.” Yvonne said. Sarah smiled at her friend before she nodded at her before they checked off the last of their duties on site and headed away to find the Chief.

Left me Sunday citing his mental health was too bad( even though every time he has had a breakdown I was the only one to help him through it ) , keeps letting me down , live too far away, issues with my dietary restrictions etc etc . Argued and eventually he hung up on me . I sent a letter and his clothes 2 days later which I received a message by the post office was delivered (left in safe place) today around midday. Not a word from them, unsure if they even got it . Tried to apologise for how I reacted, sorry if our one year made him think he had to consider if he’d have to move here one day (I own a house he asked if I’d want him to move here one day and I said it’d make sense ) a few weeks ago, said I care for him and to think about how he feels and if is happier now I understand and will move on but hope to hear from him and would be there for him etc . Nothing - 8 hours later . Figure my only choice here is no contact - I’ll rather move on and have some dignity instead of calling and texting like i want to do and chasing or he will reach out before it’s too late. Everytime he has left in the past he reaches out a few days later apologising because his mental health got too bad , so it’s possible but it’s def true he has been struggling in life and I can’t bet on it and honestly he would need to be open to help and getting off drugs if he came back so maybe it’ll be for the best .
I hope to hear from him and he comes back - if I’m being honest . But I’m not going to contact again, he has his stuff, I’ve said my piece , said I want to be in his life , left on a good note rather than crying during a breakup and have to leave it now . Give me strength please . It’s the right thing to do yes ?

How I got into wealth magick:
I was super desperate and trying to find a way to make money, I knew I had some internal blockages and this lead me to law of attraction work to change my self perception with affirmations, written and verbal, and simple loa rituals.
I noticed results but I wanted something more sophisticated so I discovered wealth magick from gom after already having used magical protection several months prior for spiritual protection and having great results. For example before MP I had seen shadow figures, and had horrible nightmares once I started magical protection and completed the sword banishing and genius spirits 33 day ritual I felt super comfortable, safe, and had no more nightmares or issues.
This gave me the total confidence to start wealth magick in fall of 2022 and complete every ritual by mid 2023.
When I started I was making 5 bucks on amazon mturk every day and driving for sub min wage for doordash.
I had no money, no real job, no investments or assets, thousands in debt, and basically no clothes besides old clothes and 1 pair of old shoes, the only thing I owned were my old computer, and 2005 sentra my parents bought me.
I was struggling severely.
Once I started wealth magick everything changed.
During the rituals I got not 1 but 2 jobs, and they both got yearly raises in pay and increased hours, and the jobs were both at home jobs that are super easy to do.
I started amassing gold as well just as one of the rituals has you visualizing gold raining around you,
I started investing, prior to this I was horrible with money, living paycheck to paycheck with doordashes meager earning and the mturk pay.
Now I was able to save with no issue, I was able to plan, I was able to delay gratification, infact investing was the gratification.
I then opened my brokerage and just started dumping in most of my pay every single month into the s&p index fund. This was slow and tedious but a good start.
Later after completing the book, literally a few days after the last ritual I got invited to a special program.
I was invited to amazon vine, this is a thing where amazon sends you free products to review, its full of everything you can find on amazon and you can pick 3 items every single day to request.
I suddenly had more clothes than Ive ever had before, more hats, more shoes, basically anything i desired that was under 100 bucks I could get in amazon vine. The neat part I figured out how to do my taxes so i dont have to pay a cent by filing as a product tester , making a corp in my name and writing everything off.
Now the final part, ive increased my confidence and knowledge in the stock market, I am trading high roi leveraged etfs and shares and stock options. I never dreamed of trading options let alone figuring out how they work and now i can realistically make several grand in a few minutes after doing some technical analysis of the stock/etf and the options chain. I have a skill were I can make money anywhere in the world.
I went from making 5 bucks a day on mturk doing surveys to 7k a day trading options on the same computer + free merch, my whole reality changed.
Get this book, it works.
Thank you GOM, thank you Angels of omnipotence and thank you Clauneck.

Hey all!
I've been lurking here since I uploaded my first video on YT, and I've found some of your threads here useful. So I thought I'd give back with a write up on my monetization journey, which, although not lightning fast, has been medium-fast (two months and two weeks from my first upload).
Who am I?
I'm a fashion photographer, with 10+ years of experience in my main field, and 3+ years of experience in the generative AI field. I started working with generative AI for a project with Vogue Italia right before the main publicly available applications were released to the wider public (Dall-E, MidJourney, Stable Diffusion), and since then my work has been a mix of traditional photography and generative AI. And that's why I became a part-time Tuber.
Finding a niche
While I was implementing gen AI more and more in my fashion photography works, I was struggling to find professionally oriented tutorials on YT. There's a ton of content about gen AI, covering news, tools, and starting out with it, but there was close to no in-depth, real-world use cases focused tutorials. So I though - hey, I'm using it in my own works. I know a ton of fellow professionals who can use it too. I can't be the only one looking for this kind of content. Maybe I should create that content myself.
Now, I don't know what you're interested in, but in order to find a niche, I'd do the same: find something you like and know about, and check if there's some aspects of it which no one covers, and you know you can cover yourself.
From the comments and commission requests I've gotten in two months, I was right. Which leads us to...
Offering value
My content is long and incredibly tedious. Honestly, it's quite boring to the layman. But it's necessary for anyone who wants to learn something applicable in their own field *or* anyone who wants to start using AI tools in their own traditional workflows, so I realized those are my audience.
To those people, I'm offering value, even if the videos are long and boring. But it's the fact that they're long and boring that's giving me an edge. Let me explain how.
Basically, from the first video, I had to choose if:

• I wanted to go straight to the point and show how things were done with the tools I was using, and show real life examples, or;
  
• I wanted to spend the necessary time to explain to anyone, even those who had no skillset in the tools I was using, how things were done.
  

I decided to go with the latter. My videos are complete tutorials, A to Z, made for people who know basically nothing about generative AI, guiding them from knowing nothing to doing exactly what I'm doing, explaining how I set up things and, most importantly, why I do it the way I do it.
Now, I needed a way to not lose the attention of people who already knew how to go from A to G, but not from G to Z, so in the first minute or so I always say something along the lines of "ok, so now I'm going to build all of my workflow from scratch, so if you're not interested in how and why it works this way, you can find the timestamps here and jump ahead to the demonstration segment".
This works, and it's why my watch curve looks like a "U". A good 25-30% of people are interested in the "how it's done", while 35-40% are interested in "what it looks like".
The only negative comment I've ever received on my format, which was something like "dude, you're too slow", was followed by a comment, a month later, by the same user, saying "I get now why you're slow, not everyone's at the same level. Please disregard my previous comment".
Strategy
Overall, I upload weekly, same day, same time, unless:

• I want to stream (unscheduled, spur of the moment short streams, around 2 hours each);
  
• something huge has come out in my niche and needs to be covered as soon as possible.
  

I don't post shorts anymore, since:

• I'm not good at making them;
  
• I don't like making them;
  
• they don't provide value to my core audience.
  

The long term goal is to find new clients for my day job, and to do consulting work on the side, given that my audience perceive me as an expert in my field.
Metrics
Now, I think that the metrics I've seen both here and in the Partnered sub are completely skewed towards niches that are not appliable to me or fellow tutorial YouTubers, or for this sub in particular, are skewed towards creators who don't have large view counts.
20-30% CTR? 50% AVD? These kind of numbers, to me, would mean that I struck gold and I created something that was flying off the shelves like cakes during the French revolution (even if that never happened). Or, most likely, that no one is watching my content expect for my most hardened userbase, *and* YT didn't push the video at all to outside audiences.
My usual metrics, which are a direct result of both my very niche content and the nature of my content (tutorials), are around 8-10% CTR and 12-18% AVD. And the videos with these metrics get pushed, hard, to outside audiences.
I think YT's algorithm kind of understands that my content is not meant to be watched from start to finish, and that my audience is very selective of what it's useful to them. So either it doesn't care about the usual metrics I see thrown around here, or those metrics are inflated.
I also think (but again, sample size=1, me) that YT kind puts each and every one of us into a "box" of sorts, in terms of how much it wants to push our content. At first, my videos had a max impressions of around 10k. Nowadays, it's more in the realm of 50-200k, and it's reflected in the amount of impressions my newest videos get when they're published. The curves all look the same until one video breaks out, and a new standard is expected out of my next videos.
Also, each video is their own thing. If a video's CTR tanks in the first few hours, I can expect it to not reach the same audience that my most successful videos reach in the same amount of time, and that's because...
YouTube wants people to see (your) videos
Well, maybe not *your* videos, and maybe not *all* your videos, but the way YT works is opposite of the way IG works, for example. While IG has no monetary incentives to pushing free content, and has to push paid content in between free content, YouTube makes money out of people seeing free content, because the paid content (ADs) is embedded into the free content (videos).
So if your video is good, YT has no issues pushing it. If your video is not good, too bad, there's another content creator in your niche who has a better video, so let's push their video instead.
By providing value to your viewers, you're providing value to YouTube and their ADs, so either you and YT win, or another content creator and YT win. In the eyes of YT, everybody wins all the time.
Increasing CTR
If you're like me, you know, in your heart of hearts, that a catchy title and a great thumbnail are as important as the content of your video. If you're like me, the thumbnail's the last thing you prepare, and we're both wrong.
Seriously, get good at creating good thumbnails. Since I've started focusing more on thumbnails, my CTR has gotten, if not better in the long run (since all videos default to kind of the same CTR the longer the video has been out for and the wider the audience is), better in the first few hours and days, which increases the audience drastically.
I know this is a boring part of the creative process, but get good at it.
Also, experiment with multiple thumbnails during the first hours when a video has been published. A thumbnail you expected to do well might not be as catchy as you thought. Try 3 or 4 different thumbnails and see what sticks.
Increasing AVD
Now in my case I can't do much about it, since the format I've chosen is kind of non-negotiable and it's what brings value at the expense of AVD, but if you're:

• seeing a sharp decrease in viewers around the 00:30 mark, work on your intros and get straight into the action;
  
• seeing a below 30% retention rate throughout the video, either there was no need for this content, or you're not covering it well enough (or you're not engaging enough);
  
• overall, give the viewers a reason to stay engaged throughout the different sections of the video.
  

Streaming
I discovered streaming way too late, and I wish I did it way earlier. It would have had me monetized at least a couple of weeks sooner.
But in order to do it well, you need:

• a good userbase who wants to extract more infos and values from things you're not covering in your uploads;
  
• the skillset necessary to basically host a mini-show.
  

The latter is the hardest part, and I only know how to do it because I'm used to giving speeches and lessons. But, like all skills, it's not something you're born with, it's something you train and get good at, so if you're into it try it and get better at it over time.
Equipment
I'm lucky enough to have a day job that covers most of the equipment needed. My camera and lenses are the same I'm using for my day job, I already had a mic, my PC is an absolute beast because of the generative AI work I do, so I think I spent like 20 bucks for a mic arm and that's it.
In anyone else's case, though, the most important things to invest in is:

• a good mic, since audio quality is more important than video quality (tons of people have terrible displays, but tons of people like to hear nice audio);
  
• 8 hours in DaVinci Resolve, and I swear you don't even need the full 8 hours, you just need to understand how to trim, cut and paste clips, how to improve your audio, and how to export files;
  
• only then, and maybe, a good enough camera, good lighting (my light is literally an ikea lamp with a 5 bucks white scrim on it, I just know how to make it look good because of my day job), minimum hardware.
  

Final considerations
Some of you may have more trouble with subs, some with watch hours (in my case, I got 2.5k subs before I reached my watch hours goal), some of you may find trouble expressing yourselves in front of the camera, or talking well, or may prefer scripts rather than talking freely while doing things, but all in all:

• do what you're good at;
  
• improve what you're lacking in;
  
• know what's useless to improve.
  

Let me know if you'd like to know more, or if I missed something.
Thanks for reading!

I don’t know how this process is navigated without utterly falling apart. I’ve had multiple claims over the past five years that have all resulted in denials until recently. This recent go-round’ was a supplemental claim with contentions of tinnitus and PTSD. (Tinnitus rated at 10% PTSD Deferred) Which consisted of one audiology c&p exam and three for the PTSD claim. For context, I had an initial c&p that was favorable, a second for the stressor which was favorable once again. Then 200 days into the supplemental (original claim filed 3/23) I get notified that another is needed, which surprise…it was extremely favorable and identified other issues I had not considered. Two weeks after the most recent I went to PFD, then today I receive a VA letter requesting MORE lay statements, another Statement in Support of Claim, and additional records requests.. right back to Evidence Gathering…I have submitted numerous documents, therapy notes, a nexus letter from my own therapist, residential treatment records, and other lay statements, family letters, etc… but they still want more? I have nothing left to give document wise, I’ve been out for 15 years, people have moved on, family and coworkers have written on my behalf… I’m at a loss and mentally, spiritually, and emotionally exhausted. The red tape is endless and I’m tired of revisiting traumas over and over. Things are rough as is without tilling the garden.

Hi, I have a question on what I should do in my situation:
I started my employment in early 2022, I requested a pay review after a year and a half but was told that the business was not in a position to increase my salary. However a bonus scheme was put in place instead that if we met the weeks sale target I would receive a weekly bonus. The breakdown of the bonus structure was sent in a text message.
Since the beginning of the year (2024) my employer stopped paying these bonuses when the target was met. It was a very stressful time of my life and I did not realise we had met a handful of weekly targets. I handed in my 6 weeks notice and then brought up the non payment of bonuses. I was essentially fobbed off and was told the accountabt would organise it. The unpaid weekly bonuses are for 8 weeks totalling owed money of over 1K.
Throughout my notice period I kept bringing this up but did not get a response. I have now since left and had my last day but still no bonuses paid. I have followed up with countless emails and messages however I have not had any communication or correspondence back. Literal radio silence.
How do I escalate this furthecan this be escalated further, as I have tried to sort this out between myself and him but due to the total lack of communication am getting no where.
Thanks.

My partner and I have been together for over 2 years. We have lived together for 1 and recently moved to another new place. We have always had good chemistry, very similar goals , interests and dreams. Besides a couple of things we are a great match. One of the things that is a big problem for me is he is not affectionate, we have had a few fights and a few calm coherent conversations where I explained to him that cuddling, occasionally offering me a light massage or hugging is huge for me, it’s like foreplay for me emotionally and by touch. He himself has his own intimacy needs that he shared with me, they are all related to sex, and I have done each and everyone of those requests even though some of them to me were just meh.
Not only have I done them, I offered to do them at certain points of our relationship myself enthusiastically to make him happy. And he has told me how much he appreciated and loved it.
But after 2 years I am still waiting to wake up one morning to him cuddling me or randomly hugging me. He will occasionally give me a kiss or quickly touch me but that’s pretty much it outside the bedroom . Few months ago I had a huge meltdown over this and told him I can’t be like this anymore, that it’s something that I lack tremendously, that I want my partner to cuddle me without asking. He got angry and defensive and shut down for days, when he came to talk after 2 days I was so angry he responded this way to me when I was hurt and vulnerable I said I didn’t want to continue. But we talked for hours and made up and he promised he will make an effort. He did for first few weeks slightly better and I hoped that progress will evolve but it has reverted back to how it was. And now I feel insecure and generally bad about myself because I have talked with him several times about this, calmly and not calmly-crying and I can no longer think he doesn’t get it but chooses not to do it
Another thing to mention is that I do most of housework, and I constantly have to ask him to do things as well, he does some easy housework without me asking, but a lot of things like cleaning toilets, fridge, bathtubs, windows, bed/towel laundry is all me. He never does it unless I ask him and because when I ask him he will reply by signing and annoyingly saying OK, I have stopped, because it feels like I pestering him.
We split the cooking id say I do 70% of that but he is a great cook. And we split finances 50-50.
This weekend I kind of had a trifecta of all these issues and ended up breaking down in tears again. First I came on to him insinuation we get busy later and he joked it off which I didn’t take seriously at that moment but nothing happened for 2 days and at the end of second day I asked him if he can cuddle me in the morning, he said yes and I asked him to promise me which he did. When I woke up he heard I was awake but didn’t come , I came out of bedroom looking upset and he realized he forgot, and said oh no sorry I forgot let’s go, at first I said just forget it, but then later we went , he spooned me while browsing with his phone and I went seriously? I didn’t really want to continue because it felt like he was doing a chore I asked him to do interrupting his phone time. So I left.
Sidenote - A week before this I asked him to go grab a small coffee table we had in our car after the move , I kept asking him all week but he never did it , so this same day I asked him again: please go grab it tomorrow I have been asking you for a week I don’t want to drive with it in my car. He again sighed and said K.
So the next day comes and by 7 pm he still hasn’t brought it upstairs so I go take up myself . He asks you need help? At that point I’m boiling inside thinking “kinda late to ask that buddy” and say no, because well I already brought it. I went into bedroom and closed the door and suddenly it all hit me: ignoring my sexual advance , forgetting to cuddle with me again then bringing his phone for the ride,forgetting the coffee table I asked him to do at least five times , I couldn’t hold back tears and waterfalls started.i know he realized I was upset but didn’t approach me, when I came to sit on a couch he asked if I was ok. I gave myself 2-3 min to calm and said: no ok you win I’m done asking you for affection I’m so tired of asking you to do things you are supposed to do as an adult, Do wtv you want I feel drained.
He interrupted raising his voice saying I told you I forgot to cuddle ! I went and cuddled with you after. To which I said ya ok with your phone in hand browsing, thanks for that special moment. And then he said I did dishes the other day. To which I replied: you took 10 minutes to load dishwasher but I literally spent 4 hours cleaning unpacking our boxes and organizing things. He raised his voice again and I said : you ask me what’s wrong I tell you and you yell at me, anything else you want to add ? He shut down. I thought F this got dressed for a walk and before I left I calmly came up and said;when I tell you how I feel you yell at me then shutdown, so let me tell you this when you are done with your silent treatment after 2-3 days don’t come talk to me, not this time. As I walking away he said “I wasn’t yelling but ok”.
I have no idea where to go from here , part of me just wants to end it because I don’t think he will ever try to fulfill my needs. Part of me wants to be manipulative, but that wouldn’t work I think. And part of me wants to tell ya let’s continue as partners / roommates as we JUST signed new lease and neither can move but to sleep separately - no intimacy.
Has anyone faced similar issues? Any ideas how I can navigate though his response ? I feel so hurt that he again chose to raise his voice rather than comfort me or apologize. I will never feel comfortable again asking him for affection at this point it would be pathetic. Besides ending it is there anything I haven’t tried that I should?

I am not requesting medical advice, just wanting to hear other people’s experience.
Hey all. First poster here. I was diagnosed with anxiety by my therapist bout a year ago. We would meet every two weeks for a little under a year in my university.
Last christmas , I straight up decided to drop out of college for a semester because I had a particularly bad panic attack of some sort for the first time. It feels weird saying all this. But I was working on a project and then I just started crying and pulling at my hair with how stressed i was. I was super tensed up too. It was so fucking weird. I decided to leave the project and i went to walk around town a little passed midnight. I didn’t come back untill the early dawn a couple hours later. I realized then and there that this whole situation was not working at all and requested the next semsester off the next day to go back home and just not be so miserable. I also dropped all of my courses so my GPA wouldn’t be affected.
I am going to be returning next semester and this can absolutely not happen ever again. The notion of taking medication of some sort crossed my mind. My therapist mentioned it back when we started but he didn’t go into any specific details.
If you are confortable sharing. What is your experience with taking medication? Did it help with the stuttering? What improvements did you notice? How safe of an option is it? I heard it can be addictive, but if it ends up working I’ll be relying on it anyways. My main concern is the possible negative side effects at long term.
Any comments are appreciated.

My husband and I just got our conditional offer accepted for a $760k property. We only have a down payment of 10%. Our combined income is $225k with one dependent. Credit scores at 750 and 840. We have no large debts, apart from a credit card in my name with 1k limit, which I usually use for anything and would pay off every pay day. No student loans.
The thing is, I used Laybuy a lot. I have closed all my buy now, pay later accounts which I think will show on the credit report as inactive anyway, but my bank account will show a number of purchases through Laybuy with the last one just being in April.
I am also notorious with takeaways, but to my defense, I never missed a bill payment, and I only spend what I have left after all essentials are paid. I know I am not the greatest at budget control hence why I let my husband handle our finances and I never requested for a credit limit over 1k.
I am now overthinking this and given that we noted 15 working days as a finance condition on our offer, I’m wondering if I messed up our chances of getting approved :(
I have been told by some friends that they literally stopped spending for three months prior to home loan application—is this really the case?

I have just made an order for the GBD -200 - 1Dr , I would like to know the realistic battery life the manual says 2 years , I would like to request long term owners to help me . As I work at sea it will be impossible for me to get a battery changed , I would like to use it as a step tracker and check the stats once a day , Can the Bluetooth be switched off and switched on when required Thanks in advance

My partner and I have been together for over 2 years. We have lived together for 1 and recently moved to another new place. We have always had good chemistry, very similar goals , interests and dreams. Besides a couple of things we are a great match. One of the things that is a big problem for me is he is not affectionate, we have had a few fights and a few calm coherent conversations where I explained to him that cuddling, occasionally offering me a light massage or hugging is huge for me, it’s like foreplay for me emotionally and by touch. He himself has his own intimacy needs that he shared with me, they are all related to sex, and I have done each and everyone of those requests even though some of them to me were just meh.
Not only have I done them, I offered to do them at certain points of our relationship myself enthusiastically to make him happy. And he has told me how much he appreciated and loved it.
But after 2 years I am still waiting to wake up one morning to him cuddling me or randomly hugging me. He will occasionally give me a kiss or quickly touch me but that’s pretty much it outside the bedroom . Few months ago I had a huge meltdown over this and told him I can’t be like this anymore, that it’s something that I lack tremendously, that I want my partner to cuddle me without asking. He got angry and defensive and shut down for days, when he came to talk after 2 days I was so angry he responded this way to me when I was hurt and vulnerable I said I didn’t want to continue. But we talked for hours and made up and he promised he will make an effort. He did for first few weeks slightly better and I hoped that progress will evolve but it has reverted back to how it was. And now I feel insecure and generally bad about myself because I have talked with him several times about this, calmly and not calmly-crying and I can no longer think he doesn’t get it but chooses not to do it
Another thing to mention is that I do most of housework, and I constantly have to ask him to do things as well, he does some easy housework without me asking, but a lot of things like cleaning toilets, fridge, bathtubs, windows, bed/towel laundry is all me. He never does it unless I ask him and because when I ask him he will reply by signing and annoyingly saying OK, I have stopped, because it feels like I pestering him.
We split the cooking id say I do 70% of that but he is a great cook. And we split finances 50-50.
This weekend I kind of had a trifecta of all these issues and ended up breaking down in tears again. First I came on to him insinuation we get busy later and he joked it off which I didn’t take seriously at that moment but nothing happened for 2 days and at the end of second day I asked him if he can cuddle me in the morning, he said yes and I asked him to promise me which he did. When I woke up he heard I was awake but didn’t come , I came out of bedroom looking upset and he realized he forgot, and said oh no sorry I forgot let’s go, at first I said just forget it, but then later we went , he spooned me while browsing with his phone and I went seriously? I didn’t really want to continue because it felt like he was doing a chore I asked him to do interrupting his phone time. So I left.
Sidenote - A week before this I asked him to go grab a small coffee table we had in our car after the move , I kept asking him all week but he never did it , so this same day I asked him again: please go grab it tomorrow I have been asking you for a week I don’t want to drive with it in my car. He again sighed and said K.
So the next day comes and by 7 pm he still hasn’t brought it upstairs so I go take up myself . He asks you need help? At that point I’m boiling inside thinking “kinda late to ask that buddy” and say no, because well I already brought it. I went into bedroom and closed the door and suddenly it all hit me: ignoring my sexual advance , forgetting to cuddle with me again then bringing his phone for the ride,forgetting the coffee table I asked him to do at least five times , I couldn’t hold back tears and waterfalls started.i know he realized I was upset but didn’t approach me, when I came to sit on a couch he asked if I was ok. I gave myself 2-3 min to calm and said: no ok you win I’m done asking you for affection I’m so tired of asking you to do things you are supposed to do as an adult, Do wtv you want I feel drained.
He interrupted raising his voice saying I told you I forgot to cuddle ! I went and cuddled with you after. To which I said ya ok with your phone in hand browsing, thanks for that special moment. And then he said I did dishes the other day. To which I replied: you took 10 minutes to load dishwasher but I literally spent 4 hours cleaning unpacking our boxes and organizing things. He raised his voice again and I said : you ask me what’s wrong I tell you and you yell at me, anything else you want to add ? He shut down. I thought F this got dressed for a walk and before I left I calmly came up and said;when I tell you how I feel you yell at me then shutdown, so let me tell you this when you are done with your silent treatment after 2-3 days don’t come talk to me, not this time. As I walking away he said “I wasn’t yelling but ok”.
I have no idea where to go from here , part of me just wants to end it because I don’t think he will ever try to fulfill my needs. Part of me wants to be manipulative, but that wouldn’t work I think. And part of me wants to tell ya let’s continue as partners / roommates as we JUST signed new lease and neither can move but to sleep separately - no intimacy.
Has anyone faced similar issues? Any ideas how I can navigate though his response ? I feel so hurt that he again chose to raise his voice rather than comfort me or apologize. I will never feel comfortable again asking him for affection at this point it would be pathetic. Besides ending it is there anything I haven’t tried that I should?

An open letter to Benedictine College and Harrison Butker
I first came across the Harrison Butker’s 2025 commencement speech at Benedictine College on Twitter. It was a short snippet of the speech and I was in disbelief of what I heard. Intrigued, I went to YouTube to find a recording of the whole speech before drawing further conclusions. Now, I am nearly beyond words.
I grew up in the Catholic Church, attended a Catholic high school, and do still consider myself to be Catholic, although not without my own qualms with the church. However, this is not about that. I am also a more recent college graduate. I graduated from a large public university 5 years ago and am looking forward to obtaining my graduate degree next year, both degrees I have worked incredibly hard for and am immensely proud of. I don’t remember my own commencement speech, but if it was anything like this, I am glad I don’t- I loved my undergraduate experience and will be proud to have my diploma framed and hanging one day. Harrison Butker’s speech is condescending, out of touch, and against the very values of your school. You both, Benedictine College and Harrison Butker, owe these graduating students an apology.
As a proudly Catholic college, I do not hold issue you or your choice in speaker with promoting Catholicism and the beliefs of the Catholic Church, even in regard to politics; while I may not agree, that is your choice to do so and one that underlies the foundation of your school.
The class of 2025, as with many recent graduates and current students, have had to work through a unique set of hardships as a whole, beyond the personal hardships we all face. Mr. Butker is not a recent graduate, nor is he working directly with a school or university. College is a change for everyone from high school, with the course load, schedule, and independence, but beyond the nervousness and uncertainty that comes with this new phase, students are able to rely on the fact that since its inception, the college experience has been relatively stable, until the COVID-19 pandemic. Students, and faculty, were forced to rapidly adapt to a situation that we knew very little about and had no history to guide us. To minimize that, say that “it is not unique,” especially as someone who was not experiencing it from an educational aspect, is disrespectful to students and faculty, regardless of beliefs on the issue. Pandemics are not new, nor are controversial policies, but what these students faced, was new. I know of no other time during our history, where thousands of students were nearly overnight told to immediately leave their housing and worry about their finances and shelter as not everyone has the means to find new housing or go back to their parents, have food outside of the dinings halls, or access to a computer and internet to complete their coursework where they had planned on attending in person or using university resources, when these things are apart of what students pay thousands of dollars for or take loans to afford as part of their college expenses. Whether or not you support these policies and changes, that does not lessen the unique hardships faced or make a student wrong for adhering to them when failure to do so could result in greater consequences. If there is another time where this has happened, I am happy to be referred so that I can learn. It is one thing to say that the feelings of uncertainty and anxiety around new policies and adapting to them are not unique, but another to say that the challenges these students faced as a result of policy is not unique, it is disrespectful, condescending, and completely out of place as someone who did not experience it.
Beyond this, it is even more disrespectful to diminish the accomplishments of particularly the female graduates of your university by allowing your speaker to advocate forgoing using their degree and instead, choose being a wife and mother. To Benedictine College, if this is what your school advocates, then why charge tuition to your female students? How will they pay for it or pay off their loans for it? Do you expect your female graduates to marry a man who will pay off their debts? What happens if they don’t or if they choose a vocation in religious life, are their debts forgiven? To take it a step further, why admit female students at all if their degree is not meant to be used? A yearly tuition of $35,000 seems a greedy ask to attain what becomes a useless degree. Maybe this is not something you support, but I have yet to see any statement indicating dissent with this position. The Benedictine sisterhood and St. Scholastica, its founder, take pride in education and she herself do not choose the vocation of marriage. How would St. Scholastica be able to attend your college when she found her vocation to be in the religious life? To Harrison Butker, how dare you? I am happy for you and your family that your wife can be a homemaker if that’s what she wants to do, but that is completely out of touch for what nearly all of these students will face as they graduate. Your family can comfortably live on just your salary of over $4 million per year, but you are a minority in this situation. You speak of not allowing cost of living to prohibiting where you live, but with your salary, I’m sure there are few areas you cannot find suitable housing and access to food. Is one supposed to choose to live in circumstances where they do not have a stable shelter in favor of a more traditional priest? Earlier in your speech you mention “accepting your lane and staying in it,” I believe you should have taken your own advice, because your lane is far wealthier than mine and likely all of the graduates you are speaking to. Most families will need two salaries to live in even a fraction of the comfort you live and even then, may not be comfortable. From what I understand, you went to GT on a scholarship, another minority, factor in student loans, and the comfort fraction becomes even smaller. Should a family live in a constant state of worry about money so that a woman can be a homemaker? You spoke of charity and the platform God has given you, but I do not see you using your wealth for charitable acts to support the lifestyle you advocate in these graduates. You decide to speak for women and presume they are most excited at the prospect of marriage and children when you are speaking to congratulate them on a major accomplishment that has little to do with their future as a wife or mother. Can a woman not find fulfillment and a calling as a valuable member of the workforce and a wife and mother. As a woman who anticipates graduating from medical school in one year, is being a doctor not part of God’s plan for me? As I understand it, my vocation, is not between being a wife and mother or being a doctor, but of the calling to serve as a married, single, or religious person. You make it seem as though I cannot be both a doctor and family woman one day. You make remarks about controlling how and when children are conceived. You condemn IVF and surrogacy when a large portion of woman and men in this country struggle with infertility or health conditions making a pregnancy incredibly dangerous. If a woman cannot naturally have a child then is she not to be a mother? Do you also condemn adoption as it a choice and controlled method of becoming a parent? Is it only if a woman is unable to conceive naturally that it is acceptable to work rather than be a homemaker? I have always been taught in my experience with the Catholic Church to welcome children into your life whenever they come about, not as a barrier to being a working mom. You have laid out the options as black or white, mother or worker, when I believe the advice is to be open to and welcome God’s plan for you in both areas of your life. Not only do you advocate for the females graduates to forgo the workforce when this is an unrealistic path for most, but in doing so, you add extra pressure to the male graduates to provide in an unrealistic way. At what cost do men take higher paying jobs they are unhappy in so that their wives can be homemakers? You have worked hard to get to where you are, say you are doing something you love, and are able to show the fruits of that labor, should these graduates not show all of the knowledge and skills they have gained through earning their degree?
To Harrison Butker, I, too, am Catholic. I believe we also are similar in that we question right from wrong and do not just blindly accept the things that are fed to us. You say that our priests and bishops are anointed by God, but quickly question that anointing. I now question you, in who you are to question who has been anointed by God. You point out it is your duty as a father to lead your son. In our faith, we call our priests Father, but you call us to question and right them, should they not lead us? Should we not follow the quote you use of trusting our priests to translate the teachings of the Bible for us? Does your son question you and what is your response? You call for priests and bishops to be righted but also to stay in our lane. I do not mean to support the actions of our church leaders either way, but as an individual am not following what you ask of these graduates.
To Harrison Butker, you say you speak from experience, but it seems your experiences are vastly different than most of the graduates you speak to. Your statements contradict one another, in questioning our church leaders, staying in our lane, and even speaking of your wife as someone who converted to Catholicism but later question being with someone of a different faith, not allowing for change. As I have stated before, it is one thing to speak of shared feelings, but another to speak of a shared experience. You give advice in black or white rather than ideas for consideration and reflection. Listening to your commencement speech, I can’t imagine I would have found excitement for the future and wisdom as I start to move forward on my own. Had this been my speech to give, I couldn’t speak to a lot of the challenges these students faced, but can empathize with the fears of stepping out of the student life and uncertainty about my future. I could speak to how being able to adapt to challenges, facing hardship in my own way has made me strong and able to persevere and that they too have grown to be stronger and able to persevere too, even if they are not confident. I could speak to how money is not always the most important thing in life, your church, your family, your community are all things to reflect on when making decisions about the future. But, this was not my speech, it was yours. My ideas may not be right, maybe it has more “fluff” than yours, but they do not tell me the right or wrong way to live my life, as that is between me and God.
To Benedictine College, much of this is address to Harrison Butker. However, this is the person you chose and supported in giving a commencement speech. What is address to him, is also a reflection of what you support and believe, and the message you hope to send your graduates off with. I am not one of your graduates, happy to say I am not with this speech, but at least for me, this is the representation I have of your school.
To Benedictine College and Harrison Butker, you both owe the graduates an apology for these disrespectful and confusing sentiments as they enter a new and stressful chapter of their lives.
To the Benedictine College class of 2025, congratulations!

This story is also being posted on royal road, my username over there is cosmicslime. You can find the rest here: ROYAL ROAD
If you do end up reading this story, then I'd appreciate a follow over on Royal Road. I'd also like to hear your thoughts on it up to chapter twelve. You can share them in the form of a review, mentioning what you did and didn't like about the story, I'll try to get through as many of them as possible.

Chapter Two - Beginning Of Ruin - Part Two

Slowly coming to a halting stop, the wooden boat previously acting as my mode of transport came to a complete rest against the river's gentle current, precisely lining up with the river dock now on my right.
Stepping out of the drifting craft, my feet made contact with the solid ground once more. For some reason the ground below me felt somewhat ethereal after travelling that short distance by water. Laid out in front of me was a paved path that perfectly divided the rows of red spider lilies on either side.
Strewing the familiar weapon across my shoulders, I flicked the timeless hood over my head before traversing the vacant road with no particular destination in mind, as I walked by, the spider lilies blowing in the wind would halt their swaying motions in an unnatural display of primal fear.
No matter how much I tried to tone it down, it seems the ominous pressure being emitted by this body couldn’t help but inspire fear in the hearts of living creatures. Even here in this Celestial realm, it was still the domain of the living so my presence here was hardly ever warranted, nor welcomed for that matter. It wasn’t hard for me to see the effect my presence had on a given setting, it would always elicit a combination of three reactions from those around me.
It was either fear, hatred or anxiety.
That was the case for all but one....just a single girl didn’t seem to mind me being near her at all.
Just as I was about to rescind myself to the inevitable fate that came along with this existence, I saw something or rather, someone approaching in the distance.
It was another young female wearing glasses and speeding towards me as fast as her nimble legs could carry her. She was holding something like a scroll in her right hand and given how awkward her tumbling strides were, it was clear that athletics weren’t her forte.
As soon as she’d gotten within range, her eyes sparked with a sudden realization, and she abruptly placed her right leg in front of her to slow her awkward sprint. Kicking up a fit of dust in the process, the green haired girl stopped just a few footsteps away from me before immediately bowing in a trembling motion.
“G-G-good evening, Sir Shinigami....or would you prefer Sir Reaper instead?” That timid question trailed behind her upturned eyes.
“It doesn’t matter. What is it Minerva? I doubt you sprinted all the way here just to give me such an awkward greeting.”
“Eh....you-you know my name?”
“Naturally.”
I saw her face lose a bit of its color after I spoke those words, but she soon collected herself before correcting her posture.
“Ah! I wanted to ask you about something. You see I’m in charge of managing the souls that get sent to reincarnate from both the overworld and Eden, but something odd has come up.”
“Something odd you say?”
“Yes, I was going through the archives just now and from what I’m seeing, none of the celestial souls that were sent to reincarnate have entered the cycle. Our souls usually tend to take a little longer to recycle but this is just an anomaly, for the past four hundred years very few of the celestial souls have managed to successfully reincarnate. That’s why I was rushing over here, I wanted to see if you could somehow properly escort Luelle instead of just letting things happen the usual way.”
“I saw her off just as she’d requested, she didn’t want me to personally send off her soul for some reason.”
Minerva’s neon eyes drooped a little lower just then, it almost seemed as if she was staring at the scroll now in her hands but after a few seconds it quickly became clear that it wasn’t the case at all.
“I see...so she’s really gone then.”
“Yeah.”
The distant silence that fell over us seemed to drown out even the humming winds now passing through the field of lilies.
“That scroll...doesn’t it automatically record everyone who enters the source?”
“Yes, I was just about to check it myself.”
She unraveled the thick parchment like material, scanning the myriad of letters that were appearing on its surface.
Her eyes widened in anticipation and after a while, a careless stream of words escaped her mouth. “It’s.....not....here.”
That was the beginning of it.
“Not there? You mean her soul....hasn’t returned to the source?”
The edges of the well-aged scroll crumpled under the force now being exerted by her slender fingers.
“Usually if I want to search for a particular soul, I just need to concentrate on the name of the person I'm trying to find. Even a vague image would usually be enough but....no matter how hard I focus, nothing comes up when I skim through the archive for Luelle’s name.”
This was a problem. All souls were originally supposed to return to the source, a realm even beyond reach of the Celestials for reincarnation, but for some reason that just wasn’t happening this time.
Souls did occasionally lose their way along that journey and eventually become evil spirits, but that kind of thing only happened by coincidence, the mere prospect of it ever occurring for a Celestial spirit like Luelle was simply absurd.
“Well, this is a problem. I’m certain I witnessed Luelle’s soul drifting off just now, but I’ll have to look into this. For now, you shoul-”
Before I could even finish speaking, a strange mechanism appeared in the skies above us.
It was a large white crack, the kind of thing you’d almost exclusively see on a mirror. The sprawling white lines spread across the sky, leaving an ominous screeching sound behind every time they expanded their jagged paths. Each fissure seemed to tear through the fabric of the heavens, revealing glimpses of an otherworldly darkness beyond. As the cracks widened, a sense of foreboding filled the air, suffusing the atmosphere with an eerie tension that seemed to reverberate through every fiber of existence.
“What....is that?” Minera barely managed to mutter those words in astonishment.
Soon after, a litany of white cryptic markings began escaping from the jagged openings, spreading across everything from the skies above to even the waves washing below. The strange symbols glowed with a demeaning white light, emanating a strange kind of energy each time it cast its ethereal glow.
“U-Uhm....Shinigami...do you know what this is?” Minerva asked from beside me, timidly surveying our unusual surroundings.
“No....but you should head back just to be-”
Cutting me off once again, the strange markings etched on to the world itself began emitting bright white sparks like a timid, yet persistent firework display. The sparking lights grew fiercer and fiercer by the second, and before I could even execute my next move, the entire world was seemingly engulfed in a blinding cascade of light. It was as if the very essence of existence had been ignited, and we were just insignificant specks adrift in the vast expanse of creation.
Before my vision was completely overpowered by the tormenting flash, I saw Minerva extend a hand towards me with tears flowing from her eyes. I wasn’t able to hear the words that escaped her, but for a second it looked like she was calling out to me.
Apparently, even Celestials found solace in my presence at the end.
The world was divided into three realms. The first of these was the lower realm that the humans inhabited, we called it ‘Terrania’. It was a land festering with humans, a world where only they were able to dominate and reign supreme - Or at least that’s what they thought anyway.
In reality, that realm had only managed to continue functioning because of the efforts of the beings known as ‘Celestials’. These Celestials resided in a realm that was far above Terrania known as ‘Eden’. They were responsible for overseeing the various aspects of the world these humans inhabited and that just meant that they were in charge of maintaining its balance. If things ever started getting out of hand, then they would intervene to re-establish that balance, but that would only happen if it was absolutely necessary. Though they could influence aspects of the world itself, the Celestials weren’t gods but rather akin to something like a superior version of humanity, the humans of the lower realm often referred to them as ‘angels’.
The only thing in the entire world that came close to mirroring anything even close to that level was the entity known as ‘Akasha’ or the ‘Source.’ It wasn’t an actual person but rather, the mechanism in place that managed the influx of both mortal and Celestial souls accordingly, managing them in a timely manner and allowing them to reincarnate given time.
It resided in an exclusive realm that surpassed both Eden and Terrania. Akasha was the recycling mechanism put in place to cleanse and return souls to the mortal cycle. Every time a human died, their souls would naturally return to Akasha over a number of years given that they hadn’t become an evil spirit or deviated from the natural order in some other way. That’s why even as a Reaper, I didn’t actually need to guide the souls of every single mortal that had perished, but rather just the ones still clinging on to the mortal realm or those that had deviated from the natural order.
Seeing as only pure souls could pass between the realms without restrictions, very few Celestials had ever gone directly to Akasha, but just about anyone who wasn’t mortal could detect its overwhelming essence radiating from some far-off place. The same went for me and I was neither mortal nor a Celestial.
That was how it had been, the way in which the world managed to maintain some amount of balance even without outside intervention, but the moment I saw those strange cracks appear in the sky I could already tell that the fragile balance keeping this world afloat was beginning to crumble.

I am working as an English teacher for classes 8 to 12 in CBSE affiliated school.
I am a brand new teacher and this is my first job in a very very small school which also happens to be shitty. It's not even 1 month yet and just in two weeks I am devastated and more depressed and frustrated than ever. It's not just students, it's also other teachers who try to press me down. And I can't quit because I don't have the qualifications required for being a teacher and no other school would probably hire me. I was doing CA and was depressed out of my mind and now I am really anxious and frustrated and just on verge on breaking down.
All kids are from rural backgrounds and are present in this school because they failed in most subjects and classes and are not even near about good in studies. All and most kids are mannerless, fucking rude and so pathetic, entire onus lies on teachers itself. And they're highly indisciplined, don't know how to talk and girls especially act so fucking brazenly, nobody even from my own age group or anyone for that matter have acted this way with me ever. Yesterday 9th class girls literally shouted on me saying, "ye 4th period nhi hai! Aapka period nhi hai!" And believe me when I say this is nothing, one 12th class girl makes such faces when she sees me in corridors or even in class, she snatched away notebook from my hands when I was correcting her "capital letters in middle of word and she argued with me about repairs and repressing meaning same thing and being one word, she didn't know how to pronounce either one!" And she storms out of class while I am teaching and bangs the door of classroom so fucking loudly that I flinched for a second. And brazenly says that papa ka number diya hua hai na call karlo, koi dikkat hai toh! Pr mughe kuch mat bolo, mai idhar hi baithungi and aise hi.
I have done everything, been strict, called on principal, complained.. every fucking thing.
And just in beginning of 2nd week, many teachers started acting domineering. One of them called me at 9pm and told me to get something done and purchase it from my own money because that school is fucking broke. I don't mind that, but why should I when she's the one who's responsible for that work. She said many hurtful things to me and I replied and she ended up disconnecting when I said why this attitude with me. Then she kept of texting, after half an hour each, telling me to "better be polite!" And other shit, I ended up blocking her and didn't reply anything out of professional courtesy. Next thing was one male teacher started taunting me and what not and I took it all in when on third day too he didn't give up and was saying something in front of 3 other teachers and 1 student, I just gave him a piece of my mind and told him to not talk to me in that manner, he immediately backed off and started saying that he was talking to me but he meant all that for the sir who was also present in room. And I just left after that for my class. Since then all these teachers obviously have groupism thing going on and they actually so fucking passive aggressively and pay no heed when I asked a subject teacher have something to say about their class because they're class teachers. And I did have anything to do with others in that group.
But that's just not one issue, I am so devastated kind of, I spent entire night crying and because I couldn't sleep so I ended up taking my first leave. All children like I mentioned previously are from rural background and most of them, I mean the majority of them are so so fucking rude. I am at my wits ends with them. Earlier it was just 10th and 12th class and now even 9th is acting up and I am actually frightened that 11th has started from today.
TLDR : Shitty first job as a school teacher, where all kids are brazenly rude, mannerless and highly indisciplined. And fellow teachers are cheap, assholes, really difficult to work with.
PS: (I guess some of you might recognise or know me from previous post in which I made in which I mentioned a student from 12th class literally oggles at me and that makes a really uncomfortable, even yesterday same thing happened I wanted to call him out but as many of you suggested that I might be mistaken or to just ignore it. Sometimes it's just that they're teenagers and seeing a young female teacher can be.. so whatever it's very subtle and based on your advices I chose to ignore it while just mentioning it to principal once.)

I am working as an English teacher for classes 8 to 12 in CBSE affiliated school.
I am a brand new teacher and this is my first job in a very very small school which also happens to be shitty. It's not even 1 month yet and just in two weeks I am devastated and more depressed and frustrated than ever. It's not just students, it's also other teachers who try to press me down. And I can't quit because I don't have the qualifications required for being a teacher and no other school would probably hire me. I was doing CA and was depressed out of my mind and now I am really anxious and frustrated and just on verge on breaking down.
All kids are from rural backgrounds and are present in this school because they failed in most subjects and classes and are not even near about good in studies. All and most kids are mannerless, fucking rude and so pathetic, entire onus lies on teachers itself. And they're highly indisciplined, don't know how to talk and girls especially act so fucking brazenly, nobody even from my own age group or anyone for that matter have acted this way with me ever. Yesterday 9th class girls literally shouted on me saying, "ye 4th period nhi hai! Aapka period nhi hai!" And believe me when I say this is nothing, one 12th class girl makes such faces when she sees me in corridors or even in class, she snatched away notebook from my hands when I was correcting her "capital letters in middle of word and she argued with me about repairs and repressing meaning same thing and being one word, she didn't know how to pronounce either one!" And she storms out of class while I am teaching and bangs the door of classroom so fucking loudly that I flinched for a second. And brazenly says that papa ka number diya hua hai na call karlo, koi dikkat hai toh! Pr mughe kuch mat bolo, mai idhar hi baithungi and aise hi.
I have done everything, been strict, called on principal, complained.. every fucking thing.
And just in beginning of 2nd week, many teachers started acting domineering. One of them called me at 9pm and told me to get something done and purchase it from my own money because that school is fucking broke. I don't mind that, but why should I when she's the one who's responsible for that work. She said many hurtful things to me and I replied and she ended up disconnecting when I said why this attitude with me. Then she kept of texting, after half an hour each, telling me to "better be polite!" And other shit, I ended up blocking her and didn't reply anything out of professional courtesy. Next thing was one male teacher started taunting me and what not and I took it all in when on third day too he didn't give up and was saying something in front of 3 other teachers and 1 student, I just gave him a piece of my mind and told him to not talk to me in that manner, he immediately backed off and started saying that he was talking to me but he meant all that for the sir who was also present in room. And I just left after that for my class. Since then all these teachers obviously have groupism thing going on and they actually so fucking passive aggressively and pay no heed when I asked a subject teacher have something to say about their class because they're class teachers. And I did have anything to do with others in that group.
But that's just not one issue, I am so devastated kind of, I spent entire night crying and because I couldn't sleep so I ended up taking my first leave. All children like I mentioned previously are from rural background and most of them, I mean the majority of them are so so fucking rude. I am at my wits ends with them. Earlier it was just 10th and 12th class and now even 9th is acting up and I am actually frightened that 11th has started from today.
TLDR : Shitty first job as a school teacher, where all kids are brazenly rude, mannerless and highly indisciplined. And fellow teachers are cheap, assholes, really difficult to work with.
PS: (I guess some of you might recognise or know me from previous post in which I made in which I mentioned a student from 12th class literally oggles at me and that makes a really uncomfortable, even yesterday same thing happened I wanted to call him out but as many of you suggested that I might be mistaken or to just ignore it. Sometimes it's just that they're teenagers and seeing a young female teacher can be.. so whatever it's very subtle and based on your advices I chose to ignore it while just mentioning it to principal once.)

This issue may not belong here, so if not, please redirect me. I didn’t know where to start. About 12 years ago, my MIL (now deceased) paid cash ($145,000) for a townhome for her son - I’ll call them Darren (64m) and his wife Dana (61f). For some context, Darren and Dana mooched off of MIL for at least 25 years and have been given hundreds of thousands of dollars. Within a year of being given the house, they drew from a line of credit because they repeatedly run up all of their credit cards and then can’t afford the payments. Darren hasn’t worked for at least 25 years and Dana only has a high school education so works as associate in payroll for companies.
My husband (62) and I (59f) went no contact with Darren and Dana right before MIL passed away. My husband took over his mom’s finances after she signed a POA, and took control of all of her debit and credit cards and checkbook and blocked Darren and Dana from access. They were furious that they no longer had access to MIL’s money. Darren was an alcoholic who became belligerent when drinking and is a physically imposing man (over 6’ and 400 pounds). Darren started threatening us trying to get us to give him the credit cards and checkbook. They live a mile from us. When we wouldn’t bend to their demands they paid an attorney to write a letter saying they were going to file charges of elder abuse and again demanded we give cards and checkbook to them along with all relevant paperwork. We ignored the letter because my husband had a POA that was signed and notarized and a drs statement attesting to MIL’s ability to understand what she was signing. They got even more desperate when we ignored their ridiculous letter. Darren was now calling my husband (his brother) and threatening to contact his bosses at his job and tell them that we are suspected of elder abuse. At this point, my husband made the difficult decision to go no contact with Darren and Dana in order to protect us.
MIL passed shortly after this and her remaining assets were liquidated (everything was in a trust) and split evenly between the two brothers. Fast forward ten years. We have had zero contact with Darren and Dana. The last time we saw Darren, he was in pretty bad shape (diabetes, alcoholic, chain smoker, zero exercise, poor diet), so we knew he would probably die young. Every once in a while, I would see if they still owned the house and also check the obituaries.
This week when I searched, I found Darren’s obituary. He died back in January 2024. I did request the death certificate and noticed on the death certificate that it said he was divorced. So in further checking public records, we found out that they divorced in 9/23. As soon as Darren was out of the house (he was at an extended stay hotel), Dana moved her daughter and daughter’s partner into the house.
Just this past week I noticed the deed on the house was changed to just Dana’s name. I am going to go to the clerk’s office and look at the divorce decree. Typically, wouldn’t Dana have to either buy Darren out for his half of the house or agree to give him half when it’s sold? If the agreement was to give him half the proceeds of the sale, does it have to be sold within a certain amount of time? The house is now worth upwards of $325,000. And what happens since Darren died so quickly after the divorce? How was Dana able to remove Darren’s name from the house? Wouldn’t he have to sign a Quit Claim Deed? And if he did, then he should have received some money. He was estranged from his only child and only sibling, so if he did have money, how do I find out who inherits it?
I appreciate any guidance you can offer. Dana is a greedy, dishonest snake, so I think she probably took any money that he had. Darren was cremated and I doubt that he had a will, unless Dana coerced him into leaving everything to her.

Hello all, I just wanted to share my story of how I fucked up recently. I'm on deferred adjudication (TX) and I've served 5 years and 7 months out of 7 years. I just filed for early termination and I made the stupid decision to drink shortly after the motion was filed. The next day they called me in for a surprise UA, triggered by the early termination request. I failed. I didn't think they tested for alcohol but I found out the hard way. Luckily I was honest with my PO and I told her I drank last night. The good news is that this is my very first violation so they won't be putting in a motion to revoke. The bad news is that early termination is most likely not happening anymore. My lawyer did say we can hold off on it for a bit so my new plan is to get 6 months to a year under my belt to show the courts I can stay clean. I'm not hopeful but I'll try anyway. If it doesn't happen I'll only have a few months left before I'm off. I've worked too hard to mess up now so I'm 100% clean from here on out. Let this be a lesson to everyone, especially if you're filing for early termination. Stay strong out there, you can do it!!

Sorry for the long ass post, but bear with me lang
It must be nice to feel again to have a special someone, someone you look forward to seeing, and someone you look forward as well to spend time with (especially on a long and tiring day).
I broke up with my ex last November, reason for it was I had to beg for the bare minimum. I only exist when she needs me, but when I’ve done it, I was cast aside. I gave her time, despite me being busy with work and being busy with law school.
I’ve forgotten about her na, moved on and let go of the grudges I had with her. Now, April 15 this year, I remember this date fondly, I had this co-worker who I was starting to develop feelings for around December, then the more I spend time with her earlier this month, the more my feelings got stronger. I decided, fuck it, aamin ako, mas better umamin ako and ma-turn down rather na di ako umamin then live the days off with regret.
I did it, I confessed to her. She already had a gut feeling, pero ayaw nya umasa (given her past experiences, which we’ll get to later). So ayun, I told her na, she didn’t shot me down, but she was undecided. Given na her past relationships, most of the guys left her and cheated on her, she became afraid or wary of anyone expressing romantic interests with her. Sinabi nya mismo na “bato ako ngayon, and matatagalan pa before ako lumambot, and at this stage pa, if meron magkakagusto sa akin and manliligaw, choice nya yun, if mahihintay nya ako, then I am willing to give that person a chance, pero if hindi, that only shows na easy person lang gusto nya. Choice nya if he will stay, ayaw ko makasakit agad ng tao na pag tinurn down ko sya, magsasalita ng masama sa akin. Alam mo naman and nakwento ko sayo mga napagdaanan ko and trauma ko from my previous relationships, yan ang malaking factor”. IDK, if ako lang, but other guys would no longer make effort knowing na it would take an effort to win that person. But ako, IDK if I’m a sane person, I decided to go with it and ipursue sya, I said to myself “Maybe, what she really wants is to find a guy na di mag-give up sa kanya, naiintindihan yung napagdaanan nya and bigyan sya ng time to fully open up and welcome someone again sa heart nya”. I decided to go for it, why not, if ma turn down pa din ako sa huli, masasaktan ako, pero at least I can say, di ako nagsisi umamin. If nareciprocate efforts ko para ligawan sya, edi TYL. She admitted ako ang first manliligaw nya na in person nagbibigay, I gave her letters, two letters in fact letting her know lang mga naiisip ko sa kanya and how I’m always here for her when she needs it.
I can’t help but imagine lang, na it would be nice sana if she were to be my girlfriend, na sya kasama ko, and yayakap sa akin, someone I can grow with reach our dreams together.
IDK lang if I made the right choice, but only time will tell.

Hi all,
I'm in a dispute with Three and could really use some external help to make sure my argument in the dispute is watertight.
Context:
I ordered some broadband from Three around 2 months ago, the router was delivered to a neighbour in my block of flats. It was "signed for" under my name and a proof of delivery photograph featuring a headless woman was the evidence. All the doors and carpets in my building look the same so there was no distinguishing features to give an indication of who it was.
I asked around the neighbours over the next few days and everyone said they hadn't received a parcel. I also sent a letter around giving whoever had the parcel an ultimatum to leave it in front of my door before I opened an investigation and no one came forward - so clearly someone was lying.
I contacted Three about this and they said they'd look into it, a week later they said they looked into it and the device was confirmed delivered - to which I said that it was delivered ot the wrong address - their reply was that there was GPS evidence, to which I replied that the GPS evidence could represent any one of the 25 flats in this building and that the photographic evidence of someone recieving the parcel was someone who was not me.
I offered to give further evidnce, via proof of signature, a picture of myself to show that it was not me who had signed for the parcel which Three refused to accept reiterating that their position was that the parcel had been delivered.
At this point I escalated the case to the Ombudsman.
After closing heir internal complaint Three then began to aggressively pursue payment from me, despite me contacting them numerous times to tell them that the issue is with the Ombudsman and I wouldn't be paying for anything as the contract terms hadn't been met.
Three's argument:
Now in the Ombudsman investigation Three's claims are:

• The GPS info and delivery photo is evidence that confirms that the router was delivered
• None of the neighbours have said they have the device
• This needs to be disputed with DPD directly for them to complete an investigation with the driver
• I am liable for paying for the service until I can give evidence that the device was not received -They've confirmed that there's no useage on the device or the mobile number

My counter argument:
My counter argument would be:

• Three has a responsibility as the sender to ensure the goods I undertook a contract for were delivered, any issues between DPD and Three before the item was delivered to me have nothing to do with me and are a seperate issue between Three and DPD, which Three is currently using as an excuse to not fulfill the contract.
• Three has repeatedly refused to give any avenue to prove that the individual represented in the claimed photographic evidence is not me, including any photographs of myself and my signature
• The notion of "giving evidence that the device has not been recieved" does not make any sense as I'm being asked to prove a negative - what could this evidence even look like if the device is not in my possession? The only evidence is already possesed by Three, which is an image of the device being delivered to someone who clearly isn't me, and they've confirmed that the device hasn't been used, neither has the mobile number.
• Three has repeatedly harrassed me for payments and given complaint updates on my account, even if I had wanted to manage the payments or read these notes I wouldn't be able to as to log into the Three customer portal one needs the mobile number of the account, which I don't have.
• I cannot identify any possible motive that Three could think I have. If I had any intentions of cancelling the contract after recieving the device, I could have done so within the cooling off period, but I called Three about the undelivered item well before this period ended. The device itself has little to no monetary value and is useless without a Three broadband contract which Three themselves have confirmed has not been made use of. -I've repeatedly given Three the opportunity to remedy the situation to no avail
• The terms and conditions state that Three is responsible for supplying me the equipment, which they have failed to do so, hence holding me liable whilst failing to uphold their own terms makes no sense.