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I Think I was in an Abusive Relationship and I’m too Embarrassed to Admit it.

2024.05.24 00:25 Affectionate_Mud1663 I Think I was in an Abusive Relationship and I’m too Embarrassed to Admit it.

CW: animal abuse, self-harm/suicide, sexual assault
As the title says, I (23M) think I was in an abusive relationship (20M) and I’m embarrassed to admit to it and talk about it.
This guy (Mark) was one of my best friends. When I was leaving some horrifically abusive situations (I have a long history of allowing bad things to happen to me in relationships), he’d offer his place to stay. Eventually, I fell for him. The thing is, neither of us had the conversation of “yay boyfriends” we just lived like we were dating. Someone new started working with us (Jim). The guy had kind of a bad living situation, so I offered our couch whenever he needs it. Mark and Jim start spending a lot of time together. Drink together in the living room whenever possible. Whenever Jim would leave Mark would insist on walking him to his car. I’m not an idiot so one time I looked out the window and saw Jim sweep Mark’s hair aside and kiss him. I confronted Mark and he said that I’d never said he was my boyfriend, therefore this was okay. So, sobbing, I said of course, you’re my boyfriend, etc., whatever. I thought that this would make it stop. It didn’t.
Eventually I became the “weekday boyfriend” (I wish I was making this shit up). He’d see me on weekdays but he wanted the weekend to spend with Jim. He neglected me emotionally, was cold to me the rest of the time. One time him and Jim were in our bed, I went in there (we were all drunk but I was significantly more so, I was upset about the situation and didn’t make the smartest decision) and he kicked me out. I stumbled to the floor and laid there and he yelled at me to get up and go. I became so, so sad. I was constantly begging him to stop with Jim, I cried, I yelled, nothing had worked. I began overdosing on Benadryl routinely (please don’t do that) as a means of self harm I believe. I told him that I was suicidal and he went to Jim’s to “clear his head.” He found me in the bathtub listening to 50’s music with bottles of alcohol and empty pill bottles beside me.
He stopped seeing Jim, but I could never love him the same way.
Months down the road, (close to a year) I broke up with him. I explained that I just, couldn’t love him the same way I used to after what happened. One day I was hanging out with a mutual friend and he called me. When he found out I was with her he flipped out on me. I excused myself and went home (I still lived with him) and he said that I was trying to turn friends against him, etc. I was confused, and hurt by this, and now I was angry. Eventually he said something to the effect of “you’re right you wouldn’t do that I was overreacting.” A few weeks go by, during this time, any time I clean, he completely trashes the place by the next few days. He had dogs, and he’d tell me to stay in my room when he took them outside (honestly this wasn’t too abnormal and something I do too if I don’t want to deal with my dogs harassing someone, but one of mine is also aggressive so). He was spending a LOT of time with friends and would only swing by for his dogs though technically lived there. I also notice every mutual friend I contact won’t reply. I kinda shrug it off.
Then one mutual friend (Cindy) shows up at my door and asks if I’m ok. I tell her that I am, but I won’t let her inside (there was a ton of trash from Mark). She leaves, I call her later, and she tells me that one of my ex’s dogs died and he’d been A) telling everyone I did it, B) told people I’d been beating him (there’s a grain of truth to this. I get combative when I’m woken up certain ways due to a horrific sexual assault when I was 19 but he’d never made me feel bad about this yet would continue to wake me up like this until eventually I locked the door to my room every night and made sure to only fall asleep in there), C) he moved out without telling me. When she told me this, I was, honestly, relieved. I invited her back into the house to help me clean. I went into the room he kept his dogs (he’d moved them all out when he moved out) and guys, this was horrific. I called her sobbing and asked her to help me deal with the room. The entire day she was with me, it was literally just cleaning this one room, that’s how bad it was.
Then a few days ago I saw him make an instagram post in the same style I’ve done for years, where it’s a picture then some writing in the description. And from what I hear, he wants “to talk to me” about moving back in but “he’s scared to.”
I can’t believe that this happened guys. I was living in this situation and was fucking BLIND to it. I let it happen AGAIN. I’m so embarrassed by this and haven’t talked to anyone about just how bad it is. I want to be caring and tell him “I understand,” he’s bipolar and got laid off and I broke up with him, yadadada, but I’m so, so angry, too. No one in my personal life knows what’s going on, and frankly, I’m scared to tell them. I don’t think they’re going to believe me. I’d leave but I have nowhere else to go right now.
submitted by Affectionate_Mud1663 to TrueOffMyChest [link] [comments]


2024.05.24 00:18 koolaidlizard Why exactly is the Cybertruck having so much difficulty with basic "truck" things? Is it the suspension, driving configuration, something else?

I've seen so many pictures and videos of these cyber-stucks failing at basic things like going over some rocks, up ramps, getting stuck in the snow, etc. I'm no engineer but have basic car knowledge. Anyone want to chime in on why these seem to be engineered so poorly?
submitted by koolaidlizard to NoStupidQuestions [link] [comments]


2024.05.24 00:15 lookitsathrowaway_11 People don’t respect the fact that I want to keep my sexuality private.

I’m so sick of this and I’m starting to get angry.
I’m currently figuring out myself and what I like and don’t like. Currently, I believe that I’m a Bisexual man. However, I don’t make that information about myself public. Frankly because I don’t think it’s anyone’s business. That’s between me and future partners.
I’m recently on a work trip abroad and I was out with a female colleague of mine. I was telling her about my new car that I had just gotten and had been working on. I had showed her a picture and told her I was thinking of naming the car Poison Ivy (due to the same colors on the car).
She immediately gave me a look and said, “wait are you gay?”
A little bit taken a back I just said no and asked why she wanted to know. She went on to say that that’s something a gay guy would call his car. This was still confusing to me as I named the car after the character from Batman and Robin (not even a fan of the show or comics, I just realized that it had similar color compositions and thought it would be funny. In fact multiple other owners of my model of car have named it the same so it’s not even original).
I kinda laughed it off and just left it at that. But the problem is she wouldn’t stop asking me. The constant “are you sure you’re not?” And “I guess my gaydar has been off lately” felt like jabs at me to “confess” to her that I truly was gay (even though I’m not).
This isn’t meant to be a jab at anyone who is very open about their sexuality. For some, it’s a big part of their life and they want it to be known and I think that’s great.
From everything I’m learning about myself I’ve just come to realize that I’m not one of those people. I’m very private when it comes to my love life and I don’t feel comfortable with people making assumptions about me when they know what my orientation is.
I dont know if I’m being irrational with all of this or not, but I just need to rant about it a bit and I wouldn’t mind hearing some perspectives on things.
submitted by lookitsathrowaway_11 to bisexual [link] [comments]


2024.05.24 00:14 SnooCrickets3850 I don’t want nobody else

The one that got away
So I don’t know how to start this but I meet this girl on a dating app and we were talking, everything was amazing even the first time we met up. She spent the night over because she was too drunk to drive home so was I was very hesitant because this person at that time was a stranger but we just vibe so well. After that day we just keep hanging out and exploring places in SD, I got to really get to know this person so well and deeply that we had so much in common, Music, ideas, etc. I started to like this girl so much but the only thing I didn’t like was she was talking to her ex still but for a reason. She had to pay him back for something which I thought It was totally fine but it started to get to a point where she was like “ugh he is just pissing me off and I can’t take this with him.” Also she would bring up certain things with him to me which I thought was weird to me because even though I knew they lived with each other about a two years ago and broke up a year ago. I never seen somebody talk about their ex so much even though it was all bad things about him but even still have contact with him. I would kinda tease her about it sometimes like “oh sounds like you guys are still together.” She denies it and says fucker I like you not him anymore but it got to a point I would say stuff like that out of concern which one day, we had a conversation about it and she said I would bring him up all the time. I never dealt with that before, so even though I know this is wrong I went on a the same dating app I found her on and was looking and I saw her sister friend at the time and I didn’t know the friend at the time so I swipe on her and we didn’t match but I get a call from the girl I was talking to and she was telling me how could I do this and everything else, which she is right I should of never done that. I just felt like she was so drawn on her ex and having conversations with him that I was going try and see what else was out there but after that we came to a agreement on just keep talking to each other. Months go by and we fall for each other, we aren’t in a relationship yet because I just feel so doubtful that it could work because in my mind she is still talking to her ex. She wants to be my girlfriend but I just kept telling her let’s wait because of the ex stuff, I didn’t tell her that but she got it. We have each others location and spring break comes, I don’t know what happened but my location stops working for her. I leave to go back home. She gets worried about not seeing it and wants to fix it and I tried to but it wouldn’t work for me even showing her that it didn’t but then I told her, I’m going be spending time with my family because I never get to see them because I play college football and she got that but it’s also my fault because I spent so much time with them and it was my birthday week so I got new things but I got crocs that had I heart N which was from my mom which represented my uncle who passed which his name started with a N but I kinda gave her slow responses to her so the break ends and she’s worried that I might have a another girl back home. I tried telling her I don’t but I wanted her to come over since I’ve been gone for a week and she had gifts for my birthday that past so everything was good but I had practice so I go to practice and I get text messages from my family friend telling me she is texting her on instagram and texting her on her phone. I couldn’t go back home to ask why she is doing that but after practice I call her and she is literally back at her house and telling me you lied to me and I know what you did and I’m done with you. She literally took an edible and drove home which I think is crazy but she is so high and I tell her on the phone which I was mad asf but had to keep my cool. What is going on and she says I have proof of you lying to me and I told her send it to me. She takes forever to send it but she does and it’s my crocs with the N and she tries to say my family friend is the girl so we go back and forth but then she realize that it wasn’t and says sorry for leaving and she also got in a argument with her mom but I tell her I think we need to just slow down we are just dating and you are doing these things. She agrees and we kinda slow down, after this she is still stalking my family friend but the spring comes to an end and I go back home. I hang with my friends back at home and she is still stalking my family friend, she doesn’t know that my family friend has a boyfriend and keeps looking at her stories and thinks it’s me so she jumps to conclusions and breaks up with me. I keep tryna tell her it’s not me and she keeps saying it is but we come to a agreement again and she asks me why do I still wanna date her when she’s done that and I tell her I just like you so much and wanna see where it can go more. You are the only one I want. Which is true and still is because this is fresh but about some weeks ago she tells me her ex and her been talking for about two weeks I didn’t know any of this but she already told him that she wants me and not him anymore but he didn’t wanna let go and she was just paying him back but he started to make conversation with her and they were just talking like friends but couple weeks ago he confessed to her about wanting her back and wants her to drop me and come back to him but they have a long bad history and she told him I’m not doing that to him, I want him in my life not you just move on and he literally pass out or something while driving because he wasn’t getting sleep or something and she calls me and tells me everything that went on and shit mad me so mad that she still was talking to him because I knew he would do something like that but he gives her a ultimatum of it’s either me or him and she told me that and tells him the next day I’m sticking with him. She couldn’t and wouldn’t go back to that place he put her in so after that I’m pissed off about that whole shit and keeping contact with him. A week ago, my family friends car stops working and asks me to take her to target get and I did because why wouldn’t I help so I do that and we are just laughing and talking then I take a .5 picture of her with my crocs half way in it and she posted it but next thing that happens is I get a text from the girl and she says fuck me, bye then blocks me on the phone and it hurt so fucking much like I still think about it and tried to tell her I wasn’t doing anything with my family friend but I was blocked. I start to post on my story and she just watches them and not saying anything and I don’t say anything as well but then she posts something about karma is coming for the people that lied to me and did me wrong which hurt because I truly wasn’t doing nothing. I didn’t wanna text her because I was still shocked that she would do that then days go by and she stops watching it. I saw she keep opening and closing her account on instagram so when she opened it again I like some new pictures of her then she texts and delete so I asked her what did she say and she said why am I liking her shit and I need to stop because my little girlfriend isn’t going like that like just being so petty then tells me I’m going block you on Instagram too so I started feeling that sad feeling and told her don’t let me just talk to you and I’m not even home I’m literally in a different state which was two days ago but I tell her everything that I love her and wanna fix it. I don’t wanna lose her but she tells me she isn’t changing her mind and I’m begging her because I truly love this girl but we come to some agreement of seeing each other Tuesday when I got back in the state so I text her and tell her my flight is going be late maybe let me stay over because I know her mom a little and her mom likes me so I said maybe I could do that and we can just talk but then she tells me that’s not a good idea and she isn’t doing that so I keep trying and trying but she says we can talk on the phone when I land so I said fine I’m cool with that. Side story when she did block me I had her YouTube still on my PlayStation so I’m looking at the music she is listening to and it’s songs that are just heartbreaks and I’m trying to put songs on her history and YouTube playlist so she can see what I’m tryna tell her but I don’t think she saw it but back to the main story. I landed and I was going to go text her I landed let’s talk but before I went on instagram to see if she unfollowed people because I just couldn’t stop thinking about her being with someone else even right now but I see she blocked me on instagram so I go to text her on her phone number and I was blocked. I had a whole letter for her and she hasn’t even seen it and it just hurts so much because I want this girl like she just matches me and it just happened two days ago so I am really hurting bad. I don’t know what to do I feel so alone but I just want her bad like what can I do and I know the story is everywhere but it’s so hard to type this out. I don’t know if anyone wants to hear all of it, maybe I can make a discord or something but I don’t know what to do and I don’t want nobody else but her
submitted by SnooCrickets3850 to Infidelity [link] [comments]


2024.05.24 00:05 ENTedb Wildlife Safety in ANC

To preface the below statements, I am coming from east coast where there is little to no danger from wildlife outdoors other than deer vs. cars. Moving with 5 month old and wife to south ANC in August.
What’s the deal with wildlife in and around Anchorage? I see pictures of moose all around the city, streets, back yards and such. Also I am aware of the black and infrequent brown bear presence and occasional wolf packs seen.
I know basic wildlife precautions regarding not getting close, messing with cubs/offspring, avoid spooking big game when hiking, and general outdoor safety, but what are the key things to know about moving to a place with big creatures roaming about.
If waking outside, on a trail, or into a grocery store and come across a moose what is best practice? Will I generally go unnoticed if they are just hanging out and I maintain my distance. Same with bear and wolves? What are dumb mistakes that outsiders make?
TLDR; Pennsylvanian moving to Anchorage with wife and 5 month old, how to not get eaten/trampled by wildlife around the city.
submitted by ENTedb to anchorage [link] [comments]


2024.05.24 00:02 KingOfAllFishFuckers Do your worst! 2011 & 2014 smarts.

Do your worst! 2011 & 2014 smarts.
Yes, they are both my cars, titled and registered in my name. 2011 green smart, and 2014 white smart. Hope it's okay picturing both since they are the same car.
submitted by KingOfAllFishFuckers to RoastMyCar [link] [comments]


2024.05.24 00:00 Cuznatch Songs with a good moving picture for kids

Sounds weird I know, but my 4 year old loves listening to music with me in the car, but recently wants songs with a good moving picture, so I'm looking to build a playlist.
Some examples she likes: - Hoobastank - The Reason - RHCP - Return of the Dream Canteen album - Al Green - How Can You Mend a Broken Heart - Goo Goo Dolls - Iris (also the punchline to her favourite joke - What's a baby's favourite band?) - My Chemical Romance - Welcome to the Black Parade - Disney stuff, obviously.
So any good recommendations, let me know!
submitted by Cuznatch to spotify [link] [comments]


2024.05.23 23:50 Fun_Tonight_6479 91/30 Nagant bolt carrier tolerances / spring length

91/30 Nagant bolt carrier tolerances / spring length
Hey guys asking for some advice from EXPERIENCED mosin owners only please. I ask kindly that you leave the harassment out of this post and keep it strictly informative.
1938 Izhevsk 91/30 mosin nagant matching serial numbers. Mirror finish bore when oiled.
I got my mosin for my 14th birthday (22 now) since it was a cheap powerful rifle that you could also get ammo for cheap (this was all about 7 -8 years ago now). Never really did much reaserch on it till now. My father did some things to it at the time. Ati scout stock, cheap rear sight scope mount, and a cheap scope. Didn’t shoot the rifle a whole lot just for fun at the time.
However now that I’m older I’m working on turning this into an accurate hunting rifle hopefully sub moa.
The mosin broke my old cheaper scope that was on it (knocked the lens out of place) from the recoil. Got a very nice leupold 3-9x x40mm optic and replaced the shitty rear sight mount with a very nice Rock solid industries drill and tap receiver mount I carefully installed myself with a drill press. Highly recommend. You could without a doubt hook a chain to the scope mount and one end to the stock and tow a car with it it’s that sturdy.
Now for the part where I ask for advice, I was having trouble at the range getting good groupings at 100 yards. Nothing to do with the optic. Shooting Surplus wolf/Tula ammo first three shots I took were about 1.5in groupings and the 2nd/3rd shot almost perfectly keyholed. However after this the groupings were all over the place probably about 3-4in groups disregarding shots that weren’t a smooth trigger pull. Sometimes the shots were almost dead accurate other about 4inches off. I’ve got PPU rounds on the way so I’ll update after this weekend on the groupings when I test. I wouldn’t really imagine the rounds to be at fault that bad but with what could be 40+ year old ammunition anything could happen right. I know the bore is good passes the bullet test flawlessly and there’s no visible corrosion I can see and as stated has a mirror finish when oiled.
However I just got a trigger kit in the mail that I’m in the process of installing along with a new bolt spring. When removing the old spring there was almost no but very little pre load tension on the spring when removing and from videos I’ve watched of other replacements they seem to have a considerable amount of pre load/ tension far far more than what was on this bolt. As pictured the new spring is considerably longer. The old spring is also alittle bent which leads me to believe that when this gun was packed away for long term storage full of cosmoline the bolt was armed and ready to fire which would cause the lack of pre load and compress the spring permanently being stored for so long under tension. Is there any way of measuring the tension when installing? Is there maybe a service manual out there that calls for a specific spring length not sure if some coils should be removed or not. Yes I’m aware of checking firing pin protrusion I’m waiting on the tool to arrive before final install.
Second part of asking for advice. As pictured the bolt body has a considerable amount of play when installed on the bolt carrier. (Bolt head is very tight on carrier). Is this considered normal? I know these guns have loose tolerances for reliability in poor conditions. The charging handle of the bolt/ rear of the bolt also moves up a considerable amount when the trigger is pulled. I know this is fairly normal. Gun also has a hard time rotating the bolt up when ejecting rounds so I’m going to give it a very deep cosmoline clean incase the new spring doesn’t fix the ejecting issue. Any advice is greatly appreciated
submitted by Fun_Tonight_6479 to MosinNagant [link] [comments]


2024.05.23 23:48 MichelangeloDG What am I doing wrong with some of theese shots?

Hi everyone, last year i went to see the wec race 6 hours of spa-franchorchamps and it was my first time on trying to shoot a race event. Unfortunately i hadn't with me fancy auto-focus or other AI things since i was using a sony alpha 5000 paired with a sony 55-210. Overall I was quite happy in terms of composition with some photos. But the issue i had during the view of some shots was focus. Tasking for example the first and the second picture, both shots were made at 1/400 and the same aperture: one car was in focus and the other no. And i can't understand why. And for example the third also again, the car is not on focus. Looking at the first two photos it seems like that I was tracking the car since the road is a bit blurry. In the third photo i am sure that i was trying to do a still shot: and my tecnique was to have the button half pressed in order to be in focus, and once the car was passing by on the scene i took the shot. Mainly i was using the focus point on the center, maybe i should switch to another setting? Thanks in advance for the help!
submitted by MichelangeloDG to AskPhotography [link] [comments]


2024.05.23 23:47 MichelangeloDG What am I doing wrong with some of theese shots?

Hi everyone, last year i went to see the wec race 6 hours of spa-franchorchamps and it was my first time on trying to shoot a race event. Unfortunately i hadn't with me fancy auto-focus or other AI things since i was using a sony alpha 5000 paired with a sony 55-210. Overall I was quite happy in terms of composition with some photos. But the issue i had during the view of some shots was focus. Tasking for example the first and the second picture, both shots were made at 1/400 and the same aperture: one car was in focus and the other no. And i can't understand why. And for example the third also again, the car is not on focus. Looking at the first two photos it seems like that I was tracking the car since the road is a bit blurry. In the third photo i am sure that i was trying to do a still shot: and my tecnique was to have the button half pressed in order to be in focus, and once the car was passing by on the scene i took the shot. Mainly i was using the focus point on the center, maybe i should switch to another setting? Thanks in advance for the help!
submitted by MichelangeloDG to AskPhotography [link] [comments]


2024.05.23 23:47 MichelangeloDG What am I doing wrong with some of theese shots?

Hi everyone, last year i went to see the wec race 6 hours of spa-franchorchamps and it was my first time on trying to shoot a race event. Unfortunately i hadn't with me fancy auto-focus or other AI things since i was using a sony alpha 5000 paired with a sony 55-210. Overall I was quite happy in terms of composition with some photos. But the issue i had during the view of some shots was focus. Tasking for example the first and the second picture, both shots were made at 1/400 and the same aperture: one car was in focus and the other no. And i can't understand why. And for example the third also again, the car is not on focus. Looking at the first two photos it seems like that I was tracking the car since the road is a bit blurry. In the third photo i am sure that i was trying to do a still shot: and my tecnique was to have the button half pressed in order to be in focus, and once the car was passing by on the scene i took the shot. Mainly i was using the focus point on the center, maybe i should switch to another setting? Thanks in advance for the help!
submitted by MichelangeloDG to AskPhotography [link] [comments]


2024.05.23 23:45 anxietitty_tm help fixing a 1930s front door

help fixing a 1930s front door
hello, I'm a little bit at my wits end trying to figure out how to fix my parents front door, the interior knob specifically. it's the original door and the house was built around 1935. the knob on the inside fell off and was lost. I tried looking for spindles and what I keep running into is they all are meant to go all the way through the door to have a knob on either side. the issue is this door has a handle set, so the spindle can't go all the way through. I don't know if there's a different name for a piece I should be looking for. right now to open it, we insert a car key or a flathead screwdriver and turn it, and we added a handle (see picture) so we can just pull the door open. every other part of the handle set works, just no doorknob. is there anything I can do apart from having to buy and replace the entire handle set, I don't exactly have the $300-700 lying around that that would require. sorry if any of this was confusing, hopefully the pictures help clear anything up.
submitted by anxietitty_tm to fixit [link] [comments]


2024.05.23 23:44 BrisAnBac Got into car crash

I (21m) got into a car crash off of a highway exit. I merged without looking twice and a truck (driver 60m) was passing me on my right, so I merged into him, it spun me and the truck collided with the drivers side of my car, damaging the car severely and pushing it about 30m down the road, making it a write off.
I'm at the hospital and they've basically said I seem fine other than shaken and I also have covid atm, but it's my first car crash and the truck that was involved is owned by the person driving it, he has insurance and I'm uninsured (ik that's irresponsible, I don't really have an excuse for it.)
He told me that he was just completely guessing but it might cost around 3500 to fix his truck since the front bumper where the spotlights are was damaged and maybe the mounts too. I had the tow truck take it straight to the scrapyard and I think he said I get 300 for that.
I'm not really processing it well but I just don't know what to do with anything. I'm the most careful driver I know and one fuck-up has basically put me in a bad financial situation cause I was planning to move out a month from now. My boss is understanding and I was meant to be going to school for next two weeks (I'm an apprentice) so ig that's cancelled since I can't get to it.
I can answer any questions anyone asks, but I'm just asking for what to do really. His insurance is meant to contact me at some point but we only took pictures of each other's drivers licences we didn't exchange phone numbers.
submitted by BrisAnBac to Advice [link] [comments]


2024.05.23 23:40 hdr321 Any Llanberis locals?

I was recently visiting Llanberis to support my brother running the snowdonia ultra. We drove through the Electric Mountain Car Park in Llanberis but didn’t park as it was too full. However I’ve now been sent a fine for not paying, I’m trying to contest it as we didn’t actually park, there was no space.
Here’s where I need your help, they’re saying there is a visible sign warning about being charged if you’re in the car park for more than 15 minutes. I didn’t see this sign and therefore don’t think it’s legal. If anyone is able to do me a massive favour, could they find this sign and send me a picture of it? Just so I can see how visible it actually is and potentially use as evidence against them.
Anyway thanks in advance guys, I really can’t afford this and also it seems pretty unfair as we didn’t actually park.
submitted by hdr321 to snowdonia [link] [comments]


2024.05.23 23:39 pika-chan03 My husband (42M) doesn't have any initiative on household or relationship stuff and I'm (32F) getting tired of it

Hello, first time posting here, so here is a brief picture of the relationship. We have been together for 9y, married the last 4. We both work, he works half from the week from home and the other days at the office, I work fully from home, we are childless but we have a bunch of rescued cats and dogs at home. A couple of years ago I lost my job and started to take care of the house, but since I got employed, I have been asking him to carry his own weight around. He claims that he helps me but in reality I would like him to have some initiative on doing the stuff that is pending around instead of him tailing after me while I'm doing chores, I even bought a blackboard to keep tabs on the pending chores but if I don't keep it updated he just forgets about it. Since he has the car with him all week, he decided to take care of the groceries, but expects me to write down what is needed from the store and if I'm not specific, he will buy the cheapest brand of whatever was requested. On the romantic side, well, there isn't none besides of what I do for him. I support him through his hobbies, buy him the videogames he wants and even help him found collection items, but he doesn't do the same for me. I begged him to gift me a tarot card deck that I wanted for months, and when he did, he bought me a knock off from an online store since it was cheaper. He is into trading cards, so I know he values original stuff over cheap knock offs, I know he does research on his hobbies and games before buying anything, so I just don't understand why he doesn't take the same care of the stuff that is for me. On most of my birthdays I'm the one buying my own gifts and cake and he excuses himself saying that birthdays aren't a big deal for him, but if he doesn't have what he wants for his birthday (weekend with his friends, playing videogames all day long, fancy food, etc) he complains about it.
When I met him he was pretty independent and capable of keeping a house but now days, he doesn't even use the washing machine. There isn't no romantic details, no surprises, nothing, and the worst part is that my feelings for him have diminished so much. I don't know what to do, or even if I can do anything. Any advice?
submitted by pika-chan03 to Marriage [link] [comments]


2024.05.23 23:34 Safe_Dimension_5563 Would my homeowners insurance accept this claim?

I have owned a home for 12 years but have never had to use my insurance so I'm not sure exactly how the claims process works. I thought about calling them and asking but then I wasn't sure if this damage might be held against me in the future if something else comes up?
I had a guy come out to clean my gutters. While he was up there he noticed hail damage to my roof. He took and sent me pictures/videos of said damage. However, idk when this damage happened. I had no clue there was damage as we haven't had any issues with the roof. Should I file a claim to try to get it repaired/replaced or will I have to prove when the damage happened? We have had bad storms recently. About two months ago my cousin, who lives in a different part of my same town, had a bad hail storm at her house. She had her car total, new siding and a new roof. However, that storm didn't hail on me. We've had a couple storms since then as well but we weren't home for them so not sure if it hailed or not. Didn't notice any damage anywhere and neighbors didn't mention anything.
I am in Missouri .. greater STL area.
TLDR; gutter guy found hail damage on the roof. Have no clue when it happened. Should I file a claim? Will they replace it?
submitted by Safe_Dimension_5563 to Insurance [link] [comments]


2024.05.23 23:34 MammothTelephone1676 My sisters boyfriend

So I first met my sisters boyfriend around 11/12 and he's always been creepily obsessed with me. He's 7 years older than me for reference. He would always find an excuse to touch me and would constantly tickle me and pick me up, "accidentally" touching my private areas, I didn't think much of it as a child. I finally managed to go no contact when I was around 19.
I still live at home with my parents so the closest I get to him is when he drops my sister and nephews to my house and picks them up (he's not allowed in the house).
I have just bought my first car, I noticed today he didn't leave immediately when he picked my sister up. I messaged my sister and ask what he was doing and she casually told me he was taking pictures of my car and checking the MOTs.
I am now scared he's going to follow me or try and cause me to crash or something stupid. How much would warrant a call to the police, if this does happen I want to be prepared as possible, I'm already in the process of buying cameras for my car.
I know it sounds dramatic but he has always been obsessed with me even my sister has said so. Hes been reported to the police qhen he was 14 for inappropriate behaviours towards a 6 and 7 year old girls. Domestic violence. Social services involved etc. There's a lot of history here but this is long enough as it. Any questions just ask. I'm 24 now and I thought I stopped being scared of him but I've had 2 panic attacks today because of this. Any help I'll be grateful.
submitted by MammothTelephone1676 to Stalking [link] [comments]


2024.05.23 23:32 Level-Papaya1616 Gucci Weed Smell

I posted recently about the Gucci Jackie I bought in Florence. I kept it in the packaging (other than to snap a couple pictures) until I got back to US and was really disappointed when I opened it to find out it smelled like skunk/weed (to the point where people traveling with me asked what smelled like weed in our camy whole car has stunk up from it). I reached out to Client Services and they offered me a gift card to return it (unfortunately, I got a great deal on it because I bought in Italy vs US so I would be out an additional $800 or so to buy one at a US store). I love the color I got and the fact it has a piston closure (which are apparently coming back?!) so I would like to keep it. I reached back out and they said they could do a 3-5 week repaideodorize to the best of their ability. Has anyone done the deodorizing process before and had success? I would like to keep this bag if possible but it’s currently not even wearable…
submitted by Level-Papaya1616 to handbags [link] [comments]


2024.05.23 23:32 InitiatePenguin Saga the Great Pyrennees

Saga the Great Pyrennees
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Shortly after adopting her. Beautiful.
We said goodbye to our beautiful angel Saga yesterday.
She was just over 2 years old when we adopted her on February 25th from the Houston SPCA. She was timid, still underweight but ever so sweet. She had been rescued by ambulance from Pyometra, a very serious infection of her uterus and a hemorrhaged vulva. She was malnourished and had evidence of being a mother. She was spayed and had both her uterus and ovaries removed.
First time meeting her
The night before we went to the shelter her photo appeared on the website - it was our second visit looking for a furry friend, we were the fist family to see her. We didn't know much about Great Pyrenees besides some 'famous' ones on social media. And we were looking for a medium sized dog (lol) but talking with the shelter volunteer who also fostered her for a week assured us that she was the perfect dog for us. We are a couple recently married in an apartment, no kids, no cats, no other pets. We didn't have the schedule to take care of a puppy and just wanted a companion. We were still unsure about the decision at first because it wasn't what we were initially expecting but there was a line of families also waiting to meet her.
Saga was perfect.
https://preview.redd.it/rj8p9d1ps82d1.jpg?width=3072&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1c08015a041f11aa2a6264e9559c73ee414ec9a1
We were so scared at first, the independent thinker, her unknown past, she didn't play, and if she did and saw you watching she would just lay down. She was alarmingly docile. It was unreal how calm and sweet she was. Within days we also took her for a general checkup with a vet we picked out. They were so surprised we had only had her for a few days but we figured it was a bit like buying a car - trust but verify. She quickly got into mischief, stealing food, climbing on furniture and destroying our door frame.
We barely left a chair untucked
Left it for only a minute
Separation anxiety had her chewing through the MDF, chewed right through despite the bitter apple.
2 weeks in, we discovered she had tapeworms. The anti flea and tick she was given was for <60 lbs. but we adopted her at 60 lbs, It might have been necessary when she was underweight but now we were behind. The vet asked if she was lethargic and my wife tearily replied yes. A single dewormer and a few days started to turn things around.
She started gaining weight, her coat started to come in, her tail looked less like a wiring tail of a rodent and more like the floofball she'd become. A couple weeks later she was avoiding stairs and had a couple cries - we were so worried that she had some kind of early onset his dysplasia - something developmentally when she was still going but under nourished. Luckily it seemed to only be a soft-tissue problem, she was already on the upswing when we mad it to the vet and after a few days of pain relievers and medication she was back to her happy - albeit separation anxious mess. We avoiding crating her because she came from a crowded hoarding environment (and is a rather large dog), we erected barriers in our apartment and she quickly learned she could climb over the couch to get around and onto the dining room table.
As part of the routine bloodwork from her initial vet checkups we got a call she was positive for Heartworm. The vet asked my wife if Saga would play and then just suddenly stop, my teary eyed wife replied yes. We had turned down another dog because she was already active with heartworm and didn't know how we would manage a new and energetic pet to stay calm through their treatment and as first time pet owners (we both had family dogs growing up) weren't sure if we would be able to crack it with our work schedules.
We jumped right in and got her on doxy and the fast-kill method. 30 days of preparatory anti-infection medicine, 30 days of waiting, her first shot, and then a month later two more. She was originally scheduled for her first shot this past Wednesday - but if you're reading this you probably already know that didn't happen.
Her coat came in so beautifully - this was before she starting to shed it!
After her first 'long' walk with Dad.
The next 2 months were amazing. She taught us about the Pyr Paw, her stubborn walks, her energy conservatism - er... efficiency... We learned she loved sand at a local sand volleyball court and park we didn't even know existed a mile from where we live. She still didn't know how to play, just pawing and darting around with afternoon zoomies. We said that we could never predict her next move. She ended up loving a playing with a Gatorade bottle the way it would erratically flip across the room. On her walks she would take census of all the other animals and where they had recently peed, she'd inspect the parking garage for stray cats and sniff every flower. We often struggled to convince her the route to take. She loved the hum are cars and watched the nearby highway for a while. But she hated loud popping sounds, fireworks, and thunder. Rain made her depressed.
She taught us how to be patient. To slow down and enjoy nature, the sights sounds, and smells.
The moment her paws touched the sand she went crazy.
At the beginning of last week the whine came back climbing the stairs. She started to whimper when getting up. We called the vet immediately for another round of medication. It continued to get worse, she cried when standing but is would strangely disappear shortly after leaving the apartment. She was her normal self when out and about.
Later in the week an in-person vet appointment took more x-rays and radiology returned a potential diagnosis of Spondylosis which the vet explained was like a bony bridge between two vertebrae - we understand now that it's a fairly general term for various abnormalities of the spine bone. We weren't going to let her jump out of the back my car anymore, even though I've always had to help her up.
Was she frequently sad or was it just the Pyreense eyes?
She didn't improve. At this point she would scream bloody murder when getting up, be okay outside, but the tail was rare, and she slowed quicker. The Texas heat was also starting to come in. Coming home she would immediately find her bed and rest. She wouldn't rise except to go out, it took both of us to orchestrate so she she could get clipped in and bolt out the door in pain, otherwise she would continue to scream and pull at the leash and have to move to get the door open causing more pain. Thursday was the last day she would eat or drink standing up.
https://preview.redd.it/nmqdg5bmt82d1.jpg?width=4080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=943a749e87212c036a578500dc4ccbb6f2bcf0db
We called the vet before the weekend at we increased all her medication to the maximum dosage. The next day was no different. The day after she had lower energy but no difference in pain.
https://preview.redd.it/lwh4zzwot82d1.jpg?width=2400&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b940f2d305ab74c647827b9870eb8d5f15259f66
It's now this past Monday, and we asked to change her Wednesday Heartworm appointment to the bloodwork that would be needed by the neurologist for a baseline. Unfortunately they couldn't start the referral process until afterwards even though we knew how limited specialist appts would be. We got the appointment moved up a day to Tuesday. The specialist on Monday had appointments for Tues/Wed/Thurs available. As soon as the bloodwork was done we were able to get a specialist appointment the next morning. The vet in seeing her rapid decline and the drugs not making enough of a distance recommended emergency care. But because she would still eat and drink, although she was growing pickier and wouldn't rise she would still bear the pain to go outside.
The neurologist informed us that she was fairly confident because of the level of pain (which was total because the appointment that morning required her to be off her meds) that she had discospondylitis, a bacterial or fungal intention of the spine which was eroding her bone. An MRI to confirm would cost $4,500, $5,800 with a spinal tap. Then bloodwork would try to identify the exact nature of the infection so the proper anti-biotics could be prescribed. The bill for that day would have been 7 grand. And we used to joke that we avoided waitlists and breeders asking several grand for a Golden Retriever (my wife's favorite - and saga was supposedly a retriever mix). We started to joke that she would cost as much as our recent honeymoon. And after that she'd have to resume Heartworrm treatment for another $1,200-2,000 depending on if we needed to start over.
There's a chance that identifying the exact infection could become difficult. There is a small percentage of dogs where treatment doesn't take at all. She'd be on medication for a year, but if we got lucky on the treatment she could feel better as quickly as a week although some damage would still be permanent. We thought about forgoing the MRI as that was absolutely not able to be afforded - the vet was fairly confident in the diagnosis, but we would never have true diagnosis, or a full picture on the state of her spine. If the infection ever came back, or if more scans were needed to track the process of treatment we would be out of luck anyways.
We made the decision to end her pain, asked for a heavy duty drug to get her back on the feet for the afternoon and went to a local park, bought her Chic Fil A even though we avoided chicken because we read the Pyrenees might be allergic, we bought her soft serve from Dairy Queen. In her last week as she grew picky we cooked her rinsed hamburger and her bacon treats became real bacon. We took her on a scenic drive through the city and parks which she loved watching all the commotion and helped her cool off because the park was quickly getting hot and she wasn't drinking much.
For comfort she would press her head into our arms or sleep with her head tucked against some furniture.
We returned to the animal hospital and spent another hour or two until hitting the doorbell. She knew in the end, she was in so much pain. My wife and I were holding hands, Saga rested her head my lap, which was completely out of character for her - she was not a cuddly dog, but she loved pets, and don't you dare stop in fear of the pyr paw. The pyr paw was so weak in the end... There we a surprising amount of relief in the end when she went to sleep - the past couple of night I had my phone open to my home cameras trained on her various beds praying she would sleep instead of panting her way through the night. Erupting out of sleep at 3am as she cried out trying to shift positions. She was finally able to rest.
We love you.
The three months she had with us was the best in her life. We got her healthy enough to feel the sun and the wind. The reality was that she was always in pain - she just wouldn't let us know. She gave us everything she had left and we gave her everything we had. We've been reflecting on how fast it ended up being but also the way we rationalized some of her behaviors as being a pyrenees - or how they were explained by the tapeworms, and how they were explained by the heartworm. In the end all of our furniture had been flipped up to make sure she didn't get caught with sharp turns. We moved her two beds together to form one large bed because she would often have to shift in ways that left part of her body hanging off the side. Nobody was sleeping. She was our world and we changed the world to make it the way she wanted - those pyrenees always had to have it their way or the highway.
We didn't get the chance to take her to the beach.
We didn't get to explore all the roads she stubbornly wanted to explore.
We didn't get the the opportunity to run off leash.
But we gave her all the love and the world and we were so rewarded in return. Mommy and Daddy love you Saga, you are free to chase all the squirrels you want. There are no trucks with air brakes, no fireworks, no bursting water pipes, no thunderstorms where you are now. You were the perfect 'little' angel, and we love you so so very much.
She was the bravest of them all.

Rest in Peace.

submitted by InitiatePenguin to greatpyrenees [link] [comments]


2024.05.23 23:32 4everfiending Tapped a car while pulling out of a parking spot and caused no damage but the person I hit was pretty aggressive. Should I let my insurance company know?

I pulled out of a parallel parking spot and didn’t realize someone had pulled up behind me— my bumper hit his license plate and neither of our cars had any noticeable damage.
I’m nervous because he was really hostile during our exchange and had some damage on the front corner of his car that I did not cause. He insisted on exchanging information because “it’s the law to report any incident in California,” and I’m concerned that he may try to blame the extra damage on me.
I took pictures of both of our cars from every imaginable angle so I’m wondering if I should just leave it alone and wait for insurance to reach out to me or if I should get ahead of it. There’s also a chance that he was heated in the moment and won’t actually file, but I don’t want to get my hopes up.
I’ve never been in any sort of collision so I don’t know what protocol is, but my insurance is already so high because I live in the Bay Area and I don’t want to put myself on the raise-my-insurance radar if I don’t have to, haha.
Any advice helps!!!! I’ve been so stressed out about this.
submitted by 4everfiending to Insurance [link] [comments]


2024.05.23 23:26 Complex-Current-1025 Welcome to Monterey Cars & Coffee

Just a place for all of us that like attending the Cars & Coffee events on the Monterey Peninsula. As well as talking about cars, posting pictures of cars etc.
submitted by Complex-Current-1025 to MontereyCarsCoffee [link] [comments]


2024.05.23 23:22 Crinski 24N05 Door hem corrosion - Check your doors!

24N05 Door hem corrosion - Check your doors!
New customer satisfaction program/extended coverage for potential paint sealant issues on the inside edges of the side doors. I checked on the customer's vehicle (2022MY) I'm working on today, and my own personal car (2023MY) and they both exhibited the concern. The repair, if needed, will be to clean, seal, and repaint the affected areas. I attached some pictures of faulty paint, looking just past the rolled edge of the bottom of the doors, paint is bubbling/peeling. it should be noted that if your dealer does not have a body shop attached to it, they will likely have to sublet the work if they inspect it and find a concern.
submitted by Crinski to MachE [link] [comments]


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