I just rewatched this movie today, and I still do not understand how Tiana could have bought the old sugar mill when the film said she had to bring the money first thing tomorrow/Wednesday. After the Mardi Gras parade, Tiana and Navene go back to the bayou for Ray's funeral, they get married, and then they have a civil ceremony that Navene's parents attend. All of these events probably took at least a few weeks. Then, after that, Tiana brings her money to the Fenner brothers and they give her the property. How does that work out when they had another buyer who had outbid her?
I'll be honest; I do not know a lot about buying property and maybe there are some processes that I do not know about. Mayber the other buyer gave up or Charlotte and her family did something, but the movie does not show that. This might be an error on the movie's part, but I am hoping that there is an explanation that fits the current timeline of events.
Sorry for the ramble, but it really stands out to me whenever a movie sets a clear deadline for certain events but the adventure should last much longer (like Shrek 4 happening in only 24 hours). Anyway, if anyone has thoughts on this matter, please share and I would love to read them.

I wanted to give back a bit after receiving some great information from folks on this sub before a (very short notice and sparsely planned) solo trip to Panama in late April/early May of 2024. I'm subtitling this post "I did a lot in Panama so you don't (necessarily) have to". Truth be told, I started the trip with 4 nights and one in-country flight booked and built the rest of my itinerary on the fly. I definitely could have used an extra week or so before the trip to do some itinerary planning, deeper research on where I chose to stay, etc. but I really enjoyed most of the trip and would absolutely recommend Panama as a solo trip destination.
Rough pre-departure itinerary:

• Panama City: Arrive at about 2 PM on a Thursday, stay three nights at Selina Casco Viejo, depart at 8 AM on Sunday via plane to David (Copa Airlines)
• Boquete: Arrive at about noon Sunday (after transit to town from airport), stay two nights at the Bambuda Castle
• Bocas for unknown amount of time/other stuff in the west off the country
• Return to Panama City from David via plane (Copa) Sunday Morning
• Return to USA on a redeye flight Tuesday night

I arrived in Panama City on time and took an Uber straight to Selina (cost $28). The Selina there is in a decent location, kind of on the edge of Casco Viejo but walkable to everything. I checked in and was told there was a welcome happy hour with a free drink and a free walking tour every day at 10. The 6-person dorm had a dedicated bathroom, but wasn't much for the price ($30/night) and I'm just now realizing I booked a 4-person dorm then was put in the wrong lodging... There is a bar and allegedly a pool on the roof of the property, but the pool was not open when I was there. The welcome drink was an underwhelming event, though I did meet a few cool people I ended up doing more with later. There really isn't much in the way of common space at Selina Casco Viejo and I found it to be overpriced, underwhelming, and not a great place to meet people. I ended up booking the canal tour ($60ish) with them (which was via the personal vehicle of the guide, a small sedan cramming 4 of us in plus the driver), but I did a different free walking tour after hearing poor reviews of the one provided by Selina. While Selina felt like a huge waste (would not recommend this location), I really liked Casco Viejo. The food was surprisingly good, especially ceviche at Marea https://maps.app.goo.gl/MdWBJ1uw4mWLB7r2A and a nice stop for middle eastern at Estambul Casco https://maps.app.goo.gl/qFq8wAm5NEzJw84F8 . I also made a quick stop with some people from the hostel at La Fabrica https://maps.app.goo.gl/WdAG1KAhwmkj1TbS8 which had a decent tap list and cool vibe and the Pedro Mandinga Rum bar (highly recommend) for some beers and a rum flight https://maps.app.goo.gl/seXCnetthN18BbUB9 . I also, as a cigar smoker, made a stop at the official La Casa del Habano store https://maps.app.goo.gl/uhswvnFPe1Y1Uzbu9 where the staff was chill and the cigarum selection was good. I finished out my cigar and partook in a bit of happy hour across the street at Finca del Mar which had a decent outdoor area for a drink https://maps.app.goo.gl/kPSiTHdd2mJmtakGA but the food was not recommended so I didn't try it.
I was up early to get to David on Sunday morning, so I figured I'd just grab food and coffee at the airport lounge (mistake). It turns out the Copa flight to David departs from the "domestic" gate, which is a standalone area on the ground floor of the airport. There are no amenities, just a single vending machine, and you get bussed to the plane. Do not go early for a David flight, security was very easy and I ended up waiting in the small seating area for way too long. The flight was fine, but don't expect to access a lounge or coffee shop after security.
I got to David pretty early and hadn't done my research on transit, but knew there was public bus service to Boquete. I was trying to figure out how to get to the bus terminal when a taxi offered to drive me all the way to Boquete for $40 which seemed like a decent deal so I went for it. Boquete is pretty small, a little mountain town with a relaxed vibe. I spent quite a bit of time at the brewery which, if you know craft beer pretty well, wasn't the best on beer quality but had good live music and a fun atmosphere https://maps.app.goo.gl/EJFiRiwQsbJ89UPa9 . I worked from here a little bit too, definitely where I spent the most time. I got a delicious dinner at RetroGusto which was really reasonable https://maps.app.goo.gl/8gcU1GHqXrfbTCoX9 and a good lunch at Donde Giselle which was a little more expensive, but also delicious https://maps.app.goo.gl/uNsz1EqCDfnSpYfk8 . I did a coffee finca tour through Bambuda ($35) at Don Pepe. It was pretty cool, not a lot of walking but the guide was knowledgeable and we got to see the full operation in a small footprint. I bought one bag and was happy I did, they were 3 times the price in the airport on the way home. The Tres Cascadas (three waterfall) trail was a must, it does have a steep section that has ropes affixed to help but was otherwise a pretty straightforward trail. It did cost a few dollars to hike as it's on private property. I took a taxi there ($20) but took the bus back ($2.25). The bus comes by every 30-40 minutes and they generally wait a bit at the entrance to the trail from the road to see if people come down. We did end up picking up a whole bunch of kids leaving school, but it was pretty funny and we managed to fit everyone. I did do the Volcan Baru hike, which cost $18 for a taxi to the trailhead but was otherwise free. It is a grueling hike, it took a little over 5 hours for me to get to the top and I was not having fun. I was very lucky to encounter a couple who was dropped off at the same time at the trailhead and, while we did not hike together, we did take a few breaks together and it was nice to be within sight of their headlamps. It was COLD at the top and I was happy I had a light down jacket and a fleece. I did a good job of timing up my climb with the sunrise, only needing to wait at the top for maybe 30 minutes before the sun came up. You can go up in a jeep, and I was very lucky to beat the offroad vehicles up as they were very loud coming up the mountain. It did get pretty crowded at the top by the time all of the jeeps had emptied out and their clients climbed the last bit to the summit. The view was phenomenal, you can see both the Caribbean and the Pacific on a clear day and the sunrise was beautiful. It was a little annoying that the 6 of us who climbed it had to share with the 25 or so who rode up in cars, but worth it. One spot I wish I had visited, but it just didn't work out, was a wood fire pizza spot that came recommended by our coffee guide and by several travelers https://maps.app.goo.gl/T93KKqHxXoQ7AFhf6 . I got lucky at the Bambuda Castle as I booked a 3 bed room but had it to myself. It had a nice restaurant and common space within the castle itself that was a good working space and had a fantastic view. The food was pretty good, with a few vegetarian options and smoothies. It's a pretty decent walk from the center of town, and about $4-5 taxi ride from the Boquete center. If I went again, I would probably look to stay somewhere in the center of town but I don't regret giving the Castle a shot.
I traveled out of Boquete to Bocas del Toro the same day I did the Baru hike, leaving via shuttle at 1 PM ($37) which I arranged through Bambuda. I ended up using a discount QR code at Bambuda Castle to book their Bocas town Hostel for three nights. The shuttle was fine, but it's a quick trip through winding mountain roads so be prepared if you get carsick. A big bonus, that I would recommend you ask about, was that this shuttle did not go all the way to Almirante, but instead stopped at Chiriqui Grande and proceeded via small boat (lancha) from there. The longer boat trip was fantastic, much better than the long/boring road which runs the rest of the way. I got stopped right off the boat in by several people trying to sell tours and got one person's number for a potential $35 Cayo Zapatilla tour but didn't commit, choosing to get to Bambuda Bocas Town first and settle in before making decisions. While I wish I had spent some more time at either red frog beach or another island, with only 3 nights and having booked late my options were limited. For Bocas Town, Bambuda was great. The front desk folks were pretty helpful and the restaurant was good for breakfast (the vegetarian burrito option is better than the sandwich). The hostel deck goes right out to the lagoon, and it's always busy with people hanging out in the sun or jumping into the lagoon. It was a great spot to do some work over coffee and, frankly, I wish I had spent more time here or at the Bambuda Lodge. I ended up doing the Caya Zapatilla tour (highly recommend, if only for the stop at Caya Zapatilla) for $35 with the operator I met right off the boat. This included pick up and drop off from Bambuda, and they had a cooler that I threw a few Balboas of my own in for the trip. We did stop mid-way for lunch which was not included and was a little expensive. This was the only actual tour I did during my time there, I spent my other full day just kind of hanging out and went to Starfish Beach (not as nice as Caya Zapatilla, but worth an afternoon) with a group from the hostel. I also did salsa night at Selina (fun, but a bad instructor) and karaoke at Aqua Lounge (get there in time to get a round of the happy hour special, the screen is behind the stage so not ideal for karaoke but it's easy to get on the list). I did not do Filthy Friday, I ended up departing Bocas that day but I would have been on the fence about it anyway. I guess it's a "when in Bocas" thing, so I probably would have gone for it. I really wish I had spent another night in Bocas, I regretted not having another day out there as soon as I left. It turned out to be the best place on my trip to meet people, it's definitely a general party vibe, and actually the best place to get work done of the hostels I stayed at. I did dinner at Pier 19 which was pretty nice, if not a little expensive and probably not a good solo traveler vibe https://maps.app.goo.gl/6vJG1rdUPCqEf9W3A . I did brunch one day away from Bambuda at Casa Papaya, their typical Panamanian breakfast and it was a great deal/meal https://maps.app.goo.gl/9CPFCxu6woWwKuwM7 . I did hear from some people that the bird island was a fun tour, and worth the day/cost. I did some bonus late night, unofficial stuff like swimming after midnight at Selina and an impromptu midnight trip out to see the bioluminescence and the stars with a random lancha taxi from the Selina dock. Not sure how I'd direct someone to arrange that, but say yes if it's an option.
I took off from Bocas via shuttle for the Lost and Found Hostel on Friday around noon ($20) which I arranged at the main lancha dock. This shuttle did not include a boat all the way to Chiriqui Grande, it was the short boat with the long road segment. A few people did get car sick during the first leg of the trip, the road is in pretty rough shape so lots of speeding up, slowing down, and swerving potholes. Lost and Found really caught my eye because of how much I enjoyed Secret Garden Cotopaxi in Ecuador. In the end, it didn't live up to that lofty expectation and I should not have squeezed it in. The allure is that it's isolated in the jungle, you have to walk about 15 minutes up the trail from the road to reach the hostel property. There are several buildings, with one primary common area with a few tables and hammocks. A big downside is that everything is outdoors, under cover of roofs but open still, which wasn't ideal in the evening during the season I went where it rained in the afternoons. There is a community kitchen if you bring your own food along, or there is an option to get breakfast/lunch/dinner from the hostel. I had a few meals there: the smoothie bowl was good, the lentil curry was a little on the salty side. The hiking is pretty cool and I ended up going up over the mountain to the big tree, the lookout, and the river. I didn't bring water, but definitely should have brought a liter along. In the end, with only about half a dozen other people staying there and 2/3 of the staff being pretty insular and not really socializing with the guests, it just wasn't a great addition to my trip. It might be a better option for a group or during a different season, but it provided a logistical challenge to make my flight back from David to Panama City and it wasn't really worth the risk of making it work, so I hired a car ($30) to take me to David and just ate the price of my second night at Lost and Found. It was beautiful, but it just wasn't on the same level as Secret Garden Cotopaxi which inspired me to give this a shot. I think, all in, my stop at Lost and Found cost me about $76.
The combination of having scheduled a flight on election day (oops) and the lack of help from lost and found staff meant that my best bet was a night in David. I used Hilton points to book a night at the Hampton and had myself a recovery night. I got a hot and ready pizza from the Little Caesar's next door and two Sam Adam's Boston Lagers from the bar. Fantastic recovery night, vey nice Hampton, and a pretty nice little breakfast. It refreshed me at a point where I was not really enjoying the trip and pushed me to go for one more stop rather than laying low in Panama City.
After my flight back to Panama City, I took the metro all the way to the Avenida Terminal (less than $1 total, it is very easy to purchase a card and load it at the station) to grab the bus to Valle de Anton. It was fairly easy to find the window to buy the bus ticket ($4.25). It's important to buy for El Valle and not just Anton, a town which is not where you want to end up. There was a confusing bit of business related to a transit card (not the same transit card as the metro. I couldn't seem to find a machine to buy one from, and eventually the guy at the turnstile took pity and just used his own to let me in. I paid him back, but it was very confusing that you needed to buy the ticket then a card with which to pay an additional 10 cents to get to the bus at Gate 53. I can't really offer advice other than you should try to figure out how to get this card, or if you can just pay with a dime, right when you buy your ticket. I let the bus (not a very big bus, somewhere between a van and a bus) driver know where I was headed on the way and they dropped me right at Bohdi in Valle de Anton. The whole trip is about 3 hours, with lots of local stops the whole way. Bohdi was a pretty cool spot, with a great yoga space with a guided lesson on a TV every morning. It has a kitchen if you want to cook for yourself and free coffee plus breakfast every day from 7:30-10:00. Both breakfasts were pancakes, but it was free and they were pretty good. There are some cool lounge spots out back, a few cafe tables out front, and a loft space as well. It was a decent, but not perfect spot, to do work if that's what you're looking for. The dorm does have 3 levels of beds, and they aren't all that comfy, but I'd recommend Bohdi. The first night I was in town I went to the Golden Frog Inn on a recommendation and it turned out to be a great spot to watch the sunset and have some pretty good (although a small) vegetarian tacos https://maps.app.goo.gl/pzRuyYuwHZvMVnAo8 . One afternoon I chose to do the India Dormida hike, I left and walked all the way back to Bohdi, it was a few hours total. It's a quick climb up to the top and you can walk the whole ridge that forms the edge of the caldera. It was a beautiful view and you can really see the old crater rim formations from the top. It's clear up there, no trees and wide open, and the breeze was very refreshing. I ended up coming down about halfway across the ridge, starting from the north. I grabbed a vegetarian dinner at El Rincon Colombiano which I'd recommend https://maps.app.goo.gl/tRcAAnAm9fYni7Nv8 and some guacamole and a beer at La Ranita which was pretty good https://maps.app.goo.gl/BcdB8uCqaSRv1RyE8 . Overall, I really liked Valle de Anton and I'm happy I made it happen. It's a little drier and warmer than Boquete, with a lot less coffee influence, but I liked the vibe and wish I had done more hiking around the area.
For my last evening in Panama, I grabbed a room just to have a place to put bags and clean up before my flight at Hotel Caracas, a recommendation from someone I met in my first stop in Casco Viejo. I did not plan to work from here, nor did I spend a night, but for $35 it was a perfect spot to leave things as I went to knock out a few more items before my flight home. I popped into Tantalo for a quick bite to eat https://maps.app.goo.gl/9pA9Dmw8AE9doabT7 which I don't know if I'd recommend for food, but the view was good. I think I meant to go to CasaCasco, which was recommended for ceviche and sushi, but ended up in the wrong spot. I then went over to Element to get some cocktails https://maps.app.goo.gl/mwYt2D7X43ua4jGu6 . Element has an interesting vibe, kind of a steampunk theme to the décor. The two guys behind the bar, who I believe own it, were fantastic. They don't have a set menu but instead try to match a drink to what you're feeling at the time. I had a classic daquiri and an old fashioned, which both came with a little bit of a twist on the classic recipe. They also pulled down a few different spirits which we tasted together, overall I'd highly recommend a stop and it was especially fun as the only patron there. After two cocktails, I cleaned up and called an Uber and headed to the airport. Just a heads up, the Copa Club is pretty nice, has limited food, but tragically closes at 9 PM. I had a flight that left at nearly 11 PM, so this was a little disappointing.
Overall, I loved Panama. The people were friendly, even if the service in many places was pretty lackluster. It's more expensive than Colombia or Ecuador, but several people told me it's slightly cheaper than Costa Rica. It's a good stop if you're not sure about central or south America as it's extremely safe, if you use common sense, and it's not too hard to get around using shuttles/taxis/ubers if you don't want to brave public transit. It offers very good food options in Panama City, and it's easy to find a Hampton Inn/Hooters/McDonald's/Little Caesar's/Wendy's if you need a break from being adventurous. The Spanish isn't difficult, and most people speak at least some English. I would have dropped lost and found hostel from my itinerary if I planned it again, but did not regret any of the other stops. I do kind of wish I had focused on Bocas and Boquete, saving Valle de Anton and maybe San Blas together for a future trip, but I had already painted myself into a bit of a corner with my David-Panama flights by the time I realized this. I hope this helps someone as they plan their Panama trip, or helps them decide Panama is a worthwhile visit! Please do not make as many changes as I did, I absolutely did at least one too many stops and wish I had spent more time in Bocas and probably Valle de Anton. Anyway, feel free to ask questions in the comments and I'll try to address them as they come in!
Final Itinerary:

• 3 nights at Selina Casco Viejo (meh, not recommended)
• 2 nights at Bambuda Castle Boquete
• 3 nights at Bambuda Bocas Town (recommend)
• 1 night at Lost & Found Hostel (not my jam, would not do again)
• 1 night at Hampton Inn David (saved my trip, loved it, would recommend)
• 2 nights at Bohdi Valle de Anton (solid, would recommend)
• 1 kind of night at Hotel Caracas (did exactly what I needed)

The main charactenarrator was an older man. I think he wore something like a straw hat and glasses. He was a painter and I think he may have had a traditional artist's palette, paintbrushes, perhaps an easel.
I'm not sure if this is a separate game or not, but other vague memories I have from that same time involved either another or the same game. if these were separate games, they were all point and click.
The game may have had elements of country or folk culture, because maybe there was a banjo... a barn, a farm?
one memory involves animated animals that taught counting games. There may have been a swamp or forest, a treehouse, a restaurant... The swamp or forest game involved memory or math with frogs, or turtles. there may have been a library at some point in the game(s?), an owl and music.

Hi im 19 (20 literally next week wtf. I’m so old😭) and I’m from USA 🇺🇸 well ethnically Latina but raised in the US. U know what I mean 😭
I haven’t posted on here in a hot second so I’m not sure what to say lol. I like tennis, frogs, chicken wings with A LOT of ranch. My favorite restaurant (have to gate keep because it’s local 😔) has the best ranch. I also rewatched breaking bad for the 1000th time and am about to start better call Saul for the second time.
One of my dislikes is the word “ick”. I say it in my head tho which makes me dislike it more 😭😭 like I need to incorporate more words into my vocabulary so I stop saying it. I don’t say it out loud but I think it. A lot.
Anyways yeah. I feel like I overshared lol. hopefully this post isn’t friend repellent 💀😭

I just got back from an amazing trip to Costa Rica, spending around $1300 on activities, transportation, hostels, food, and souvenirs.
A few things I wish I knew before my trip: you need to drink tons of water and electrolytes everyday since it's so hot and humid, you will get bug bites no matter what you do so bring anti itch cream, having a small towel to dry your hands is helpful since a lot of bathrooms don't have hand towels or dryer, people are very appreciative of you knowing a small amount of Spanish.
Here's my trip report:
DAY 0:
I flew into San Jose in the evening and stayed at Stray Cat Hostel (arranged transportation through the hostel).
Stray Cat Hostel: Pros- very clean, cats, employees were very nice Cons- hostel was overbooked (given option of bed in mixed dormitority or room in hotel across the streer), limited bathrooms, lack of shelves in bathrooms/showers.
DAY 1:
I had a breakfast of eggs, beans, and rice at Stray Cat Hostel and walked 10 minutes to bus stop for Transmonteverde public bus (booked online in advance). The neighborhood was pretty quiet, mainly residential and I felt safe, though I was alert and had directions in one ear bud and the other ear bud out so I could hear around me.
At the bus station there was a long line of people waiting, but i wasn't sure for what bus. I asked the employee at the bus station for where the bus to Transmontevde is and he directed me through the turnstiles and down to the bus.
The bus seats had little leg room and not much room for you to have your bag with you unless you had an empty seat next to you. We stopped 2.5 hours into the bus ride at Restaurante Vista Al Mar, which had bathrooms (free), some food, and cold drinks. This was about a 20 minute break. The road became very twisty in the last hour to Santa Elena.
The bus stopped at on the hill in Santa Elena, a short walk to the main town area. I got lunch at the Orchid Cafe, which was pricey, but had a nice setting and large servings.
There is a bank right by Orchid Cafe, as well as an ATM across the street from the tourist info center. I found that there's a great bakery called Panaderia el hornito de pilo, right across the street from the bus station that has inexpensive and yummy pastries (approx. 800 CRC each).
Booked the shuttle to Monteverde Cloud Forest through my hostel, OutBox Inn. Hiked the recommended trail loop, which included a suspension bridge (easy hike and well signed) and saw quetzal and coati very close. I had dinner at Taco Taco, which was pricey but had good food and nice energetic atmosphere.
OutBox Inn: Pros- very clean, perfect location to access everything, lovely patio with forest view, nice common area Cons- cockroach on toilet seat (screen in window doesn't close all the way)
DAY 2:
I had a leftover pastry from the bakery the day before for breakfast and was picked up for ziplining by Treetopia (over $100). There were 7 ziplines and I chose the company because they're the only one that has automatic braking. It felt very safe and was so much fun after I got over the nerves on the first two. Most of the employees seemed to speak English. There was a tandem zipline at the end that you need two people for. If you're solo like me you'll need to pair up with another person. There is an expensive gift shop and restaurant once you finish ziplining (plus you can pay $25 for your photos and videos).
For lunch I got a sandwich from a Cafe and ate it on the OutBox patio, then got picked up for Don Juan cacao, Sugarcane, and coffee tour. The guide had a great sense of humor and it was an interactive tour. Got dinner afterwards at Tico y Rico, which was around $19 for a vegetarian casado and soursop smoothie (large portions and friendly employees who asked if I have any allergies).
DAY 3:
Got pastries again from the same bakery before getting picked up by Caribe shuttle to go to La Fortuna. 45 minutes into the drive we stopped at an expensive store and restaurant for a short break, then drove another 45 minutes to Lake Arenal to catch a boat ride (45 minutes) and then another 30 minutes via shuttle to downtown La Fortuna. It was really nice to have a backpack instead of having to carry or drag a suitcase across the sand to board the boat across Lake Arenal (which I saw many people struggle with).
I checked into Hotel La Choza Inn and booked the unlimited Shuttle at the front desk ($20). There is a bank just by the park in La Fortuna, which was helpful since the hostel only took cash.
Lunch was at Soda Hormiga, which had gotten recommended, but while the food was pretty good and reasonably priced (about $6.5 for rice, beans, and plantains plus juice), I found that the employees weren't very friendly.
In the afternoon I took the unlimited Shuttle to Lago Parque Ecologico Volcan Arenal, where I hiked for a couple hours (which ended up being a mistake since it was so hot out). The park was beautiful and not crowded at all, I only saw a handful of tourists the whole time (plus a large group of schoolchildren).
I ended up deciding to go to Clinica Benitas since I wasn't feeling great and it has good reviews (plus was right by downtown). The doctors and staff were wonderful and made me feel as comfortable as possible. They were able to diagnosis and prescribe medication to help me feel better. I ended up costing about $400 for everything (including labwork) and then another $40 for medications at the pharmacy.
I had dinner at Spec-taco-lar, which was pretty good and had nice people watching.
La Choza Inn: Pros- inexpensive, easy to meet people, free breakfast, nice courtyard area, 24/7 reception and locked gate at night, easy to walk to everything in La Fortuna, air conditioning Cons- thin sheets with small hole, only one bathroom for 10 people (although there's a couple toilets downstairs by the courtyard), shuttle driver wasn't very friendly, open window in shower that allows bugs to get in.
DAY 4:
I had breakfast at La Choza Inn (eggs, beans and rice, juice, banana, toast) and had a relaxing morning. I got lunch from Chipotle's, where the sweetest woman works. She was so helpful and told me to ask her if I have any questions at all.
I then scheduled a wildlife tour walk through La Fortuna Hikes and Trails, which was a 15 minute walk from downtown. Sergio was an amazing guide and was so knowledge about all the wildlife. We saw sloths, bats, blue jean posion dart frogs, a Fer du Lance snake, a lizard, and a turkey like bird. The walk was only $32 for nearly 3 hours! We ended the tour with sugar cane juice and tortilla making with two abuelas, who then gave us tacos, dessert, and juice (all part of the price!).
I didn't have enough time to go to the waterfall, so I decided to go to Relax Termalitas hot springs instead ($18 plus a couple dollars for locker renral) which was like a casual resort with many different pools of different temperatures. I took an Uber there and back and it was pretty easy and cheap. I ended the day at Open Kitchen, which was expensive, but had huge portions.
DAY 5:
I took a shuttle (booked through Caribe) from La Choza Inn at 5:30 AM to get to Tortuguero. We stopped about 2 hours in for the included breakfast, then had another 1.5 hours or so on the shuttle and then took a 45 minute boat to Tortuguero. We saw a crocodile and river otter in the canals.
I checked into Aracari Garden Hostel and booked a night walk ($30) at the front desk. Lunch was at Tutti's Pizza (where I saw a green basilisk) before I caught the public boat to Cerro Tortuguero. I purchased my ticket to the hike online in advance (only cost around $2, need to book online). The "hike" only ended up being about a 20 minute walk through the forest including climbing some stairs, but the view was beautiful from the top. I saw two different types of monkeys in the treetops! There were also a lot of bugs. I killed some time before the boat arrived by exploring the other paths at the bottom of Cerro Tortuguero.
I caught public boat back (3000 CRC round trip purchased at the dock in Tortuguero) and got lunch at El Patio, which had tables on a dock right on the canal. The food was pretty good and priced alright.
My last activity of the trip was the guided night tour. We met at the hostel and walked through the outskirts of the village and into the forest, sewing wolf spiders, grasshoppers, a sloth, birds, and a baby snake.
Aracari Garden Hostel: Pros-good place to socialize, good prices, breakfast included, easy walk to everything downtown, nice courtyard, quiet area, 24/7 reception Cons-sheets were thin with a hole, only one bathroom for 10 people (though there were a couple toilets downstairs), unlimited Shuttle wasn't really worth it (Ubers are pretty cheap and it had very limited times, plus the driver was grumpy).
DAY 6:
Stopped at the grocery store on the north end of Tortuguero for snacks and electrolites and then got some pastries from Dorling Bakery (the pastries were cheap, but dry). I enjoyed my breakfast on the beach at the Carribean Sea and put my feet in the warm water.
I used Caribe Shuttle to arrange transportation back to San Jose. I had the bus drop me off at the Marriott Hacienda Belen since my flight wasn't until very late and I had about 6 hours to kill. I ate some (expensive) food at the cafe at the Marriott (supposedly open 24/7) and then hungout in the large, beautiful lobby until it was time to Uber to the airport.
I got to the airport with lots of time to spare and security was an absolute breeze.
Unfortunately, an hour or so before my flight was supposed to leave I got a message that the flight was canceled. Soon enough, everyone got a notification that the flight was off and there was lots of confusion and frustration as the gate board still showed the flight as on time, plus there was no gate agent or employee to talk to. Alaska sent out an email saying they rebooked me on the soonest available flight, but it wasn't until more than 24 hours later. I ended up finding the soonest available flight on another airline (about 9 hours later) and canceled my other flight. Eventually a gate agent showed up (as well as the pilots), and people starting lining up to figure out what was going on and get on a sooner flight. In short, I ended up spending about 9 hours total at the airport and was not happy with Alaska Airlines. Fortunately, I made it home safely, just 7 hours after I was originally going to.

Pavyllon Dinner 3 stars Overall Top Pick Counter seating is where to be. New Age Design. Behind the Petit Palais. Out of the park food that never ended, 7 courses with great wine pairings. Was a wonderful kitchen to watch. Some of the best beef and seafood I have had. Great liquor selection ‘62 Calvados. Got a tour of the kitchen and sister restaurant and didn't ask.
Nicholas Flamel Lunch 1 star Overall Top Pick Plating/Presentation Chose here because I ate across the street my last visit at Le MaZenay (Also Recommended) Old world style building made with exposed timbers and sleek finishes, supposedly 1407, clean but rustic. Two floors, I sat on the first floor near the kitchen. 7 courses of extremely fresh food new age/modern with wine pairing. Make their own Armagnac. Great desserts.
House Roustang Dinner 2 stars Beautiful wood paneling dining room with a beautiful wine cellar. Traditional but innovative twists. Did the discovery menu with pairings. Great seafood and the biggest asparagus I have had so far. Bresse chicken was amazing. Very chic and was quite for my visit. No views of the kitchen.
Benoit Lunch Amazing building but seating can be very close haha. Seemed very popular for lunch and I can see why. Great onion soup I had this trip. Had a delicious tenderloin with a great morel mushroom sauce and duchess potatoes. House made madeleines. Felt like home cooking.
Chantoiseau Dinner Overall Top Pick Casual Very small restaurant with a great little patio. I was lucky to eat outside for most of my meal on the patio. Was a great corner to people watch and that night a thunderstorm was coming in but I liked those. It didn't start to rain or get cloudy until my dessert. Felt very much like home cooking. Definitely was the only person from the US. Extremely tender and delicious veal chop.
Alan Geaam Dinner 1 star Overall Top Pick Fusion Lebanese and French food. Definitely one of the most deliciously interesting dinners I had. Many new flavors to me that kept me guessing. Did the 7 course menu with wine pairing. Again, I was the only US person there and loved it. Best foie gras I had this trip. Their presentation was very innovative. The biggest Langoustines I had this trip and the most innovative way I have had them. Great sea bass and morels and some of the freshests desserts but also interesting with a cheese ice cream. Was great to finish with calvados and some tea. Struck up a conversation with a very nice French/Lebanese couple drinking Arak.
Alliance Dinner 1 star Overall Top Pick Service* Tiny restaurant with kitchen views really close to Cathédrale Notre-Dame. Asian/French modernish. Did 9 courses with pairings of probably the freshest seafood and vegetables I had this trip. Some of the biggest peas I have ever seen and the best; and I hate peas. Beautiful presentations and great service. Great cheese selection, that my favorite now escapes me. Great balance of desserts. My only complaint was there were out of 4/5 Calvados’ that were on their menu but they did compensate by letting me have an Armagnac from the ‘60s and got to finish my dessert with no other tables.
GranCoeur Dinner Overall Top Pick Laid Back Wanted to return to this place for dinner. They have a great patio for lunch or dinner and a beautiful inside. Had some great fresh oysters, lamb shoulder and finished with great cheese. They also had a good wine list. I picked out a 2015 Chateau Pontet-Canet that went great. This place was very popular even late at night so if you need a later dinner.
Divellec Lunch 1 star Overall Top Pick Seafood Beautiful restaurant with a huge wine list. Near Hôtel des Invalides. Had the best oysters and frog legs I had this trip. Also some lobster from Brittany that was just beyond. There were many more things that I wanted to try here. I got there early so ended up being the only one there for lunch for most of my meal. Finished with some great tea and great Calvados that I ended up finding a few bottles online to purchase since the producer died.
Le Procope Early Dinner Overall Top Pick Historic/People Really wanted to eat on the patio here but got rained out but I sat inside which is also great since it is a beautiful historic building. Felt very traditional cooking. Very good snails and Pate. They were out of the calf’s head by 4pm but the tenderloin was extremely tasteful. There were many other things I wanted to try here but didn’t get the chance as being too full. Had some great rhum baba and gelatos to finish.
Joséphine Chez Dumonet Lunch Overall Top Pick French Got here early and didn’t realize how popular this place was so I was thankful to get in as the patio was closed and this place filled up very fast, per se haha. Beautiful old interior that I really wish the day was warmer as it would be amazing in summer. I had great wine and a selection of liquor. Very traditional cooking, my favorite of the bunch. Had some amazing foie gras and langoustines, that I was educated upon biting the claw open. I was being very gentle with them. I really should have tried the beef tartare but went with the still great pigeon. Again this place had many other things that I would come back to try. I wasn't going to get dessert but ended up getting the souffle, which was amazing but the other desserts also looked great.
Takeaways and tips
Make a reservation of course And make sure you confirm! I saw a few people turned away. I used fork for many reservations and a few calls/emails
Even if you are too full from the last meal, just go and pace yourself, I thanked myself. All my meals were solo and averaged 3+ hours.
Try something even if you don't like it if you are doing a tasting menu Some other patrons were a little too particular in their tasting menu ‘choices’.
Go with the wine pairing or get a bottle for the meal.
Please be considerate of other patrons' experience and respect the restaurant. Step outside if you need to take a call or more; at least a starred restaurant. If using a camera to take photos please turn off the sound features. I take photos too but don’t want to hear; clickclickclickclickclickclickclick
Don’t be afraid to ask questions and I don't speak any French 7 courses might actually mean 10+
Don't full up on bread and sparkling water haha

One would’ve thought I’d be used to this by now – typing with one arm. It takes time to get used to; especially when you’ve spent most of your life in front of a keyboard. Muscle memory digs deep.
A few years ago, I was in a car accident. I was going 60 down an empty road, coming home from a long day of overtime, when some kind of animal came charging out of the woods. Trying to avoid a collision, I swerved off the road. My front left wheel got caught in a ditch, sending the entire vehicle careening off the road; only to smash into the trunk of an ill-placed black walnut tree, driver’s side first.
I have this vague memory of blinking lights and vague shapes in the distance. I was so cold. But at the same time, it was so unreal. I couldn’t even understand what had happened.

I was brought into emergency surgery. My left arm was, literally, hanging by the thread of my jacket. It had come off clean by the socket.
According to the surgeons, I was lucky. Most of my shoulder was intact, so it became a matter of salvaging what they could. The cut had been clean. I did suffer some whiplash damage to my neck and lower back, but considering I could’ve easily died or gotten paralyzed, losing an arm was considered “mild”.
Looking back at it, I am inclined to agree. Considering what could’ve gone down, I was damn lucky. Still, in that luck, I wished I could’ve gotten just a tiny bit luckier. See, I had this gold ring that I’d been given by my later mother. A simple thing with the engraving of a musical note on the inside – a memento of our shared love of music. We played Louis Armstrong at her funeral.
That ring disappeared in the accident. Somehow, that’s what bothered me the most. My arm could be reattached. It could heal. But that little memento was just gone.

What followed was a long period of intense physical therapy, medication, and painful readjustments. It took weeks before I could even move my fingers again, and when I did, it felt like pushing your nerves through an unwashed garlic press. It was this stunning chemical-level kind of pain. The kind where your body just shuts down, begging you to stop.
But over time, I started to get over it. Small movements started to get better. I could tie my shoes. Press the space bar. Hold a knife. I wasn’t about to juggle anytime soon, or play the piano, but I could get by.
Soon enough, I got back to work.

People were glad to see me. I wasn’t gonna be able to work at full capacity in my usual role, but I could still sit in on meetings. I won’t bore you with the details, but most of my work relies on answering e-mails, proofreading, and translation. It’s pretty technical stuff that requires a lot of pitter-patter on keyboards.
At one point, I was stuck in a particularly drawn-out meeting between two clients that we were facilitating. I was there mostly as an observer (to fill the seats), but I was supposed to weigh in if something related to my department came up. Of course, it didn’t, but I still had to act interested. My colleague was trying to draw up a compromise between the two parties, laying out terms and conditions. Meanwhile, I was nursing a cup of coffee and waiting for the day to be over.
Looking over to my side, I noticed something odd. I wasn’t just holding the coffee cup with my left hand; I was stroking it with my index finger. Sort of like how you’d scratch a wary cat under its chin.

It was a strange sensation. I was looking at my own arm, my own hand, and I couldn’t feel what was happening. I couldn’t feel the ceramics tapping against my finger, or the twitch of the nerve as it contracted and extended. It was just happening. An involuntary twitch, perhaps.
But it didn’t feel like it. It felt intended, somehow.
A few similar events took place that day. Grabbing the bathroom door for a little too long. Knocking over desktop decorations. Suddenly letting go of my jacket as I was about to head home. It was just little things. I was still having trouble even using my arm in the first place, so these quirks didn’t bother me too much.
A friend of mine was giving me a ride home. I wasn’t at 100% yet and sitting behind the steering wheel felt like inviting disaster. Instead, I sat in the passenger seat, nodding off as the trees passed me by with a steady rhythm; causing me to blink.

A noise pulled me back. The driver said something, but I wasn’t paying attention. Turning to him, I excused myself.
“Sorry, what was that?” I asked.
“What are you doing?” the driver repeated.
I looked over. My left hand was wrapped around the parking brake, as if ready to pull. I forced myself to let go.
“Nothing,” I said. “Sorry, I don’t… it’s nothing.”
“Right,” he nodded. “Just… don’t do that.”
“Yeah,” I agreed. “Yeah, no. Sorry.”

That night, I was exhausted. It felt like my lungs had been robbed of breath. I felt weak and trembling. I was cold, yet feverish. Famished, but without an appetite. I went to bed early, faceplanting into the pillow.
I had horrible nightmares, none of which I can remember. I kept waking up over and over, not being able to discern dream from reality. My bed was soaked with cold sweat, sending shiver after shiver up my spine.
By the early hours of the morning, a stray ray of sunshine burned my eyes open. I was lying on my side, looking towards the window, leaning on my left shoulder.
The fingers of my left hand were moving on their own. And not just moving, but bent in every which way; as if lacking bones. They were vibrating, shuddering, like wounded worms fearing a predator.

I grabbed my hand, and my fingers were back to normal. I could move them as usual. For a moment, I was doubting what I’d seen. It was one thing to experience oddities, but that was unreal. I must’ve laid there for half an hour, just expanding and contracting my hand, begging my body to work with me.
“Enough of this,” I begged. “Please. Enough. Please.”
I clapped my hands, cracked my fingers, and ran them through my hair. It was fine. Nothing out of the ordinary. Right?

A couple of weeks passed without any serious peculiarities. I could even work a little. There were a few of oddities, like unknowingly grasping a warm cup, or my fingers pointing in all directions when in contact with cold water. Just strange little things that I could easily get control of.
That was, until one morning at work. We were out of coffee, so I was making myself a cup of tea instead. As the water came to a boiling point, I accidentally spilled some on my arm.
The reaction was immediate.

My arm whipped out to the side, throwing the pot across the room. For a moment, my arm looked like it didn’t have any bones; rippling like a skin-covered liquid. It made me think of it not as a part of me, but as an alien thing attached to my shoulder.
And for a brief moment, in the blink of a heartbeat, I could see my fingers grow and shrink. Fingernails throbbing, like a cat throwing up a hair ball.
Suddenly, it stopped. Looking back, I could see one of my co-workers watching me from the other side of the room. She must’ve heard the crash.
“You alright?” she asked.
“Yeah, just got a burn,” I sighed. “I’ll, uh… I’ll be fine.”
She side-eyed the broken pot on the other side of the room and nodded. Not entirely convinced.

As soon as she left, I looked down on my hand as if shying away from a wild animal. It was alien to me. It was something… other. A twitch was one thing, but this was downright unnatural.
Coming home that night, I had a weekend ahead of me. I ran my symptoms through a couple of online services. While there are a few ways the human body can trick itself, like the alien hand syndrome, or phantom pains, this was different. Physical properties do not rapidly change. Then again, maybe I was imagining it?
I decided to do something crazy. An experiment. I wanted to recreate what’d happened in the break room.

I boiled up some water and poured it into a cup. I held my left hand over my sink, grabbing the cup with my right. I stood there, trying to calm myself. I wasn’t insane. This was a rational thought that I had to play out in order to eliminate an outlandish possibility.
I prepped a cold pack and ran the tap. Then, taking a deep breath, I poured some of the boiling water on my left hand.

Twelve fingers.
My hand split into twelve fingers, lined with raw, open wounds. My wrist rolled, like a cobra fixing its eyes on a prey animal. This was no longer an arm – it was a nest of flesh-colored snakes.
My mind blanked. I fell backwards, smacking at my arm as if trying to kill it. I couldn’t feel a thing. It’s as if all sense of touch ended at my shoulder. I crawled backwards on the floor, trying to wave my arm away, but it clung to me like a parasite fixed on my shoulder.
Seconds later, a searing pain ran up my arm. Looking down on my hand, it looked as it always had. It was just a hand with a burn. I could barely feel it through the pounding in my chest. Every noise in the room was overshadowed by my pulse.
I ran my hand under a tap and wrapped a cold pack around the wrist. It wasn’t a bad burn, but it wasn’t nothing.

I did some research, looking up news from around the time my accident took place. There were a couple of reports, but nothing out of the ordinary. A domestic call, a brawl at a local restaurant, a couple of missing pets. There were a couple of other reports, but they were short and didn’t lead anywhere. A mention of a couple disturbances. Some idiot blasting music in a parking lot.
But there was one more thing I noticed. In one of the reports covering my accident, there was a picture of the car. There was spatter of the blood on the hood, with something meaty stuck in the grille – as if I’d hit an animal.
That caught my interest. I couldn’t remember hitting anything, so what the hell was that about?

The next day, my arm was acting up even worse. It kept going cold, as if circulation was cutting in and out. Before heading out, I wrapped it up in bandages. Partly because of the cold sensation and partly because I just didn’t trust it. There was no way to tell what could happen, or why.
I managed to get a hold of the owner of the junkyard where my trashed car had been towed. I went over there early in the day, just before the fog cleared.
Now, this was long after the car had been crushed and stored, but it was the only lead I had. An older woman greeted me at the gates, letting me in. We had a short chat about the accident as she showed me around, ending up at a stack of metal that could hardly be recognized as anything. The only thing to even hint at my car being in that pile was a thin slice of colored metal from one of the doors.

I dug around there for about 20 minutes; all while being observed by this old woman.
“Yeah, won’t find much,” she said. “If the police didn’t get it, the insurance folks did.”
“Been a lot of people digging around?”
“Not a lot, nah,” she said, shaking her head. “But you ain’t the first.”
And she was right. There wasn’t a drop of blood, or bone, or anything. It was just scrap metal in a pile of even more scrap metal. I was wasting my time.

But as I was about to leave, I noticed something. I hadn’t thought about it, but I could see the old woman was wearing a ring. It looked like a wedding ring at first, but she was wearing it on the wrong finger. I pointed to it.
"You found that?"
"What about it?" she asked.
"It’s got a tune engraved on the inside, right? Like, a, uh… music note?”
There was no response. She just looked at me and sighed. Turns out, I was right. She gave it back.

She’d found it near the hood of the car the night they brought it in. Grabbing it was just a spur of the moment thing, and since no one had come asking for it, she’d kept it. I was a bit annoyed, but mostly relieved that I got it back. But the question remained, how had that ended up at the hood of the car?
“There was all kinds of gunk just kinda hanging there,” she said. “Figured it was an animal.”
“And you’re sure that’s where you found it?”
“Sure as sure can be, yeah.”
I stood there for a moment, feeling an uncomfortable thought forming in the back of my head. There was no way for that ring to go from my broken arm on the driver’s side to a pile of meat stuck in the grille of the car.

But the proof of it had been in front of me all along. I had worn that ring for 12 years. There was a permanent indent on my finger.
Looking down at my left hand, there was no such indent.
This wasn’t my arm.

As soon as that thought settled in my mind, I could feel the arm twist and turn. Hadn’t it been for the bandages, there’s no way to tell what it would’ve done. It squirmed and pulled against me, thrashing like a dying fish on land. The old woman just looked at me.
“You alright? Want me to call someone?” she asked.
“I-I… I don’t know,” I said. “I don’t know.”
I had to get to the bottom of this. I hurried out of there as fast as I could.

It was getting late in the afternoon when I got back home. Grabbing an old backpack and a couple of painkillers, I was about to head right back out. But a thought hit me. Maybe it wasn’t as abstract as I thought. Maybe it wasn’t just a feeling – maybe something was really there.
Looking down at my arm, I could feel it stirring, just within my control. Something sleeping, waiting to spring into action. With my right hand on the front door, I stopped, and spoke out loud.
“Whatever you want, just… don’t,” I asked. “Don’t.”
There was no response. No stirring. On a spur-of-the-moment whim, I packed one more thing into my backpack. Just in case. A hail Mary.

Making my way to the scene of the accident, it was impossible to tell anything had ever happened there. I could barely even make out the place where I swerved, or where my wheel got caught in the ditch. I found the general area in the field where my car had spun out of control, and from there it was easy to find the tree I’d smashed into. It was still there.
I spent hours going over it all. Following the path the car had taken, starting from that tree, and working my way back. There was nothing there. Nothing new. It was all just gravel, weeds, and pavement. What had I expected? A signed confession?
As the sun dipped behind the clouds, I could feel a cold wind coming on. I’d lost track of time.

As I turned back, there was a sudden cramp in my arm. A shock of pain crept up my spine, spreading throughout my body like a spider’s web. I could feel my left arm throbbing against the bandage wrap. Something was wrong.
I was in the middle of the field. I could see for miles in every direction. Cars passing by in the distance. Wet grass staining my pants all the way up to my knees. And this one cold wind, cutting straight through my clothes. I shivered, but my left arm didn’t.
Taking a step back towards where I came from, another shot of pain struck me. This one tripped me, sending me face first into the grass. It knocked the air out of my lungs.
I rolled over on my back, gasping for breath. My left hand was creeping up my stomach like a spider with a meaty tail. It stopped over my face, tapping the bridge of my nose with the index finger. I couldn’t feel a thing. Moving to push it off, it instead struck back; grasping my right hand in return.
“Stop,” I wheezed as I sat back up. “Just stop. Stop this.”
But it didn’t. I just sat there. A wounded man holding his arms.

I struggled back and forth for well over half an hour. Getting back on my feet, only to get knocked back down. By the time I’d made my way back to the road, I looked like I’d been hiking for miles. My hair was a mess, and my clothes were covered in grass and mud. I had a handprint across my face, like I’d smacked myself.
I’d trusted myself with a short drive to get there, but I wasn’t sure about going back. It felt reckless to get behind a wheel in my state. Still, I couldn’t just walk all the way back home, and having it towed would be a pain in the ass.
I got back in my car while I thought about it, wiping myself off with a towel from my backpack.

It’d gotten dark outside. The overcast didn’t help, I could almost taste the rain. I contemplated my options and figured that if I kept it slow and only used my right arm, I could carefully make my way home. I put the keys in and turned on the headlights.
There was an elk standing in front of my car.
It sniffed the hood of my car curiously, then proceeded to stare me down. I was just surprised. I got a good look at it. There was something wrong with one of its hind legs – it lacked fur, and there was a sort of spreading baldness reaching halfway up the side of the body.
My arm was slowly rising on its own, as if looking over the dashboard. The elk recoiled, as if in pain, and set off in a troubled three-legged gallop. It disappeared into the woods.

Looking down at my arm, a stray thought hit me.
Was this spreading too?

I painstakingly made my way back home. I dropped my backpack in the hallway, locked my front door, and collapsed into the shower. I was exhausted.
I stood in the shower for about half an hour, looking down at my mother’s ring. I was wearing it on my right hand now, but it just didn’t feel the same. That wasn’t where it was meant to be. Still, it was nice to have it back. Whenever I turned the ring a little, I could feel the engraving against my skin. It was a little gesture I did when I was anxious, as a reminder that it was still there.
I got dressed and ready for a slow evening at home without any further drama. My arm wasn’t acting up. But as I passed through the hallway, something didn’t feel right.

At first, I couldn’t say what it was. Maybe the hum of an old lamp, or some air duct acting up. I wasn’t sure, but it was something. It had to be. I stepped up to the front door.
There used to be a light coming from the hallway outside. That light was always on, and there should be a little light coming in through the peephole. But there wasn’t. Had a fuse blown? I had a closer look.
There was someone just outside my door.

A click.
My left hand had unlocked the door.

The door flung open, knocking me back. A tall silhouette, close to seven feet tall, pushed its way into my apartment. It was dressed in a sort of black poncho, covering its face with layers of bandages. A single frog-like eye stared me down as it pushed forward.
I scrambled backwards on the floor. It was fast. Damn fast. It stepped forward and reached for one of my legs, but I managed to pull away in time. I got back on my feet, barely managing to pull my left arm along. It was trying to grab a hold of something, as if to slow me down.
In a spur-of-the-moment decision I grabbed a lamp from the windowsill, throwing it across the room. The intruder ducked, then came at me again. I ducked under, just in time, and headed for the door.

As I reached the front door, my left arm tried to force it shut. I fought against myself to get out, but it was useless. The door was shut and locked, and my left hand refused to budge. The seven-foot-tall shape came around the corner, slowly approaching. I had to think of something. Anything.
My backpack. It was right there.

I had packed a couple of things earlier. A towel, some bandages, painkillers, and a water bottle. But I’d also packed some lighter fluid. Seeing as how my left arm had reacted so violently to boiling water, I had this stupid idea that the prospect of a straight-up fire would do something even worse to it.
It didn’t seem so stupid anymore.
I grabbed the lighter fluid and sprinkled it on my left arm. The tall shape stopped, seemingly reacting to the smell of it.
I wanted to say something, but all that came out were empty breaths. We were like animals, circling each other, waiting for one to make the first move. I emptied the lighter fluid, grabbing a box of matches. I held the box with my mouth, and a triplicate of matches in my hand. I spilled the rest on the floor.

For a moment, we just looked at one another. A single inhuman eye peeking through the bandage wraps. The vague shape of four, maybe five extremities at its side. How many arms did this thing hide under the poncho?
A flash of realization came to me. This is what I had almost hit with my car.

And with that, I lit the matches. It leapt at me, but it was too late.
The moment the open flame touched the skin on my left arm, it detached. The open nerves just let go of me, and the thing fell off my body. It squirmed on the floor like a dying animal, grasping at whatever its fingers could reach.
Adrenaline forced me out the door. A heartbeat behind me, the seven-foot-tall figure scooped up my burning arm and pushed past me. Within seconds, it was gone – leaving me with an open wound in the stairwell, smelling of lighter fluid.

One of the neighbors called for help. I didn’t even notice how much blood I was losing, but it was bad. They sent me back into emergency surgery; this time without an arm to reattach.
It was deemed that the wound was self-inflicted. A result of some stress-induced psychosis. I wanted to agree, but I saw what I saw. I’ve been trying to convince myself otherwise, but I lived this. This wasn’t any other life but mine.
I’ve since learned to live with a full prosthetic. It’s not much, but I can trust it, and I can wear my mother’s ring the way it was supposed to be. It’s starting to make an indent on the synthetic skin.

I don’t like to think about what would’ve happened if I’d let that thing stay on. But just a couple of weeks ago, I got an answer. I was stuck in traffic, looking out over the fields, when I saw a group of elks in the distance.
One of them had no fur.
None at all.

1. Fascinating Animal Kingdom Facts:

• Some frogs can freeze solid during winter and thaw out in spring, continuing their lives.
  
• Anteaters have no teeth and consume up to 30,000 insects a day with their long tongues.
  
• Male penguins propose to their lifelong mates by giving them a pebble.
  

1. Unusual Historical Nuggets:

• The oldest known "your mom" joke was discovered on a 3,500-year-old Babylonian tablet.
  
• Ancient Romans used urine as a teeth-whitening agent due to its ammonia content.
  
• The Boston Tea Party, often seen as a rebellion against high taxes, was more a protest against a tax cut.
  

1. Science and Technology Oddities:

• A single strand of human hair can support up to 100 grams in weight.
  
• The world's first computer programmer was Ada Lovelace, who worked on Charles Babbage's Analytical Engine in the mid-1800s.
  
• There are more possible iterations of a game of chess than there are atoms in the known universe.
  

1. Language and Linguistic Quirks:

• The word "set" has the highest number of different meanings in the English language.
  
• The longest word in the English language without a vowel is "rhythms."
  
• The word "facetious" contains all the vowels in alphabetical order.
  

1. Geographical and Cultural Tidbits:

• The country of Monaco is smaller than New York City's Central Park.
  
• There are more public libraries in the U.S. than McDonald's restaurants.
  
• Mount Everest is not the tallest mountain on Earth when measured from base to peak; Mauna Kea in Hawaii holds that record.
  

1. Human Achievements and Records:

• The longest duration spinning a Guinness World Records book on one finger is 4 hours and 25 minutes.
  
• The record for the most push-ups in one hour is 2,806.
  
• The world record for the longest handshake is 42 hours.
  

1. Food and Culinary Marvels:

• The first product to have a barcode scanned for purchase was Wrigley's Juicy Fruit chewing gum.
  
• The world's most expensive burger costs $5,000 and contains gold leaf, caviar, and truffles.
  
  • The world's largest chocolate bar weighed over 12,770 pounds.

1. Entertainment and Pop Culture Trivia:

• The first movie ever made was the 1895 film "Roundhay Garden Scene," lasting about 2.11 seconds.
  
• The world's most-watched television event is the Super Bowl.
  
• The shortest film ever nominated for an Oscar is "Fresh Guacamole," which runs for 1 minute and 40 seconds.
  

1. Legal Quirks and Odd Laws:

• In Switzerland, it's illegal to flush the toilet after 10 PM in an apartment building.
  
• In Canada, it's illegal to use comic sans in official government documents.
  
• In France, it's illegal to name a pig Napoleon.
  

1. Miscellaneous Intriguing Facts:

- Honey never spoils; archaeologists have found edible honey in ancient Egyptian tombs. - Human bones are ounce for ounce four times stronger than concrete. - A small child could swim through the veins of a blue whale. 

I’ll go first:

1. Prince for Snow White: love a man who can rock a cute blush 😂
   
2. Prince Charming: okay that moment when he jumped out of a window to see Cinderella sold me. Loved that he was still nice to Anastasia even though he didn’t love her. But a moment from the og movie I liked is just when he sees her for the first time, iconic.
   
3. Prince Phillips: okay I have a bias because Princess aurora is one of my favorites but he was the first Prince I felt really actively fought for his love. He was arguing with his father, fighting a dragon, rejecting royal expectations just for his love. It’s hard finding a man that will kill a spider for you let alone a dragon 😂 also I love how he respect Briar rose’s request to meet her aunts first. Best singing voice.
   
4. Prince Eric: he’s very attractive. I liked him more in the live action because that man was in love down.
   
5. Beast: man can’t even read but he got his girl a whole library, also his scenes during the something there are so adorable.
   
6. Aladdin: the fact that when he describes Jasmine to genie it isn’t just things she does for him or how she looks, it’s her character. There is a reason their love story is so heavily focused on the sequels.
   
7. John Smith:… he’s a… love the hair
   
8. John Rolfe: love the hair
   
9. Shang: I chose to ignore the majority of his characterization in Mulan 2 but I do like her taking Mulan’s family line. Also still dating the person you fell in love with even though they are just some beautiful woman now, so brave of him. Also would.
   
10. Milo: we love a nerdy king. Also love how he’s like I’m an expert in this language and then immediately folds and can’t speak.
    
11. Naveen: that man was so so in love with Tiana it hurts. He went from singing “a blonde on my left and a brunette on my right” to literally proposing to a frog. He also rejected becoming rich by marrying Charlotte to be with Tiana showing he has really changed. Also the fact that he went to work in Tiana’s restaurant as a prince, uh love him love them. Also would.
    
12. Eugene: when rapunzel’s mother would always kiss her hair he pushed the hair out of the way to see her beautiful. This movie is peak romance and him saying “rapunzel you’re my new dream” is one of the best lines in Disney history. Also would.
    
13. Kristoff: A sweet guy, I also love that he’s a bit huskier than the others and that gives some good rep for little boys.
    
14. Namaari: Would.
    

Let's get it all out of the way up front. I know, no one asked. No one cares. What kind of A hole can afford to eat at all these places. Yada yada.
The fact is the culinary scene is changing by the month here in St Pete. I view this as a good thing. After reading the 100th question asking where to eat and drink around town I thought I would document some places I've been to around St Pete for those who are interested. I enjoy spending my finite disposable income and leisure time exploring local eats & drinks with good company.
I am in no way qualified to be providing these unsolicited opinions. My opinions are probably all over the place and inconsistent - some will speak to value and others quality. These are in no particular order. There are hardly any chains on this list - I would much rather support local spots. Ready? Let's go.
Three Birds Tavern: Love the vibe of the outside patio. They even have a British telephone booth out there. Solid tavern / bar food. The lamb burger is fantastic. Shepherd's pie is not bad. Servers are so nice and bubbly. Worth it for lunch or brunch. Martini deals on Thursdays (I think they're $5).
Pin on Cafe: My go to lunch spot. Unfortunately they are moving down central a mile but they have fantastic pad Thai and a great value lunch menu, where you can build your own meal. Probably eaten here 30 times. Very friendly staff.
Bodega: If you're into Cuban sammies (don't hurt me but they're not my favorite) then this is the place. I'm told they're fairly authentic. Good speakeasy in the back. More on that below.
Bohemios: New Spanish tapas restaurant off central. Don't let the lingering BurgerFi sign fool you - the food here is exceptional. A tad expensive but good quality. They have been slow since opening but the chef & servers are super nice and love chatting to patrons. The chef is an especially awesome dude and a fantastic cook. Got the lobster cargo, empanadas, flank steak, meatballs, and lamb lollipops. All bangin'.
Frog Pond: Great family spot for breakfast or lunch. No frills / nothing fancy, just a good familial vibe and frogs painted on the walls. Got the BLT and pancakes. Both yummy.
Lure: Pretty cool place, but I still can't figure out what their "thing" is. Is it a sports bar? Billiard Hall? Sushi bar? Apparently it's all three. Surprisingly solid food (including the sushi), good music, fun place to hang out with a big group of friends before a show at the Floridian. Great happy hour and food specials.
Lemongrass: Solid Thai food. Went here for a date, and while that didn't go super well the food was again solid. Not mind blowing. But solid. Did I mention it was solid?
Zaytoon Grill: I love Mediterranean food. I had a kefta kabob, hummus, rice, salad. I admittedly need to try it again. It was decent, I've had much better kabob. But again, want to give it another try. I ordered takeout so can't comment on the place itself but I hear the staff are great.
EngineNo9: I was told this was the "best burger in town". This is false. Well, maybe for the money it is. After having just about every burger on the menu, I can say without a doubt the best burger in town is in fact Left Bank Bistro's Burger. My gawd. I think they sprinkle crack in the brie they put on top. Anyway, this is engine9. If my expectations were lower initially I think I would recommend it as a value play. Good place to watch sports. Jambalaya is meh. Sriracha wings are delicious though. So are the tots.
Tony's Pizza: A very solid pizza place always slinging deals on door dash. They have nice wide, thin slices, similar to NY style.
Gateway Subs: really good subs and creative too. For instance, you can get crushed Doritos on your sammy.
Brooklyn South: Middle of the road sandwiches for the price.
Mangosteen: I've only gotten takeout and thought their sushi was decent. This place and Lure seemed similar in their food offerings. When I walk by the vibe looks pretty cool. They do BOGO deals on door dash too.
Maple Street Biscuit Co: The hangover cure you've been looking for. Great biscuits & gravy. They have this fried chicken biscuit with a pepper jelly type thing and it's... Hang on I need a minute... Utterly delicious. Instead of giving them your name when you order, they ask you a thought provoking question, which is kind of fun (e.g. who in all of history would you want to meet?).
11 Chicks: Great Venezuelan food. Get an arepa and some of those to die for deep fried cheese things. Don't sleep on the 11 Chicks bowl. A little pricey for chicken and rice but the quality is chef's kiss.
Fresh Kitchen: Decently healthy, solid food. Like a healthy chipotle. You're in and out of there fast. If you need a somewhat healthy $12 bowl go here. Also everyone who eats there is somehow a fitness model and/or gorgeous.
Pacific Counter: Also a decently healthy, solid fast casual place serving poke bowls. Staff is super nice. Bring your dog - they will spoil with salmon skin treats.
Hotdog Stand (8th & Central): I haven't caught her name, but she slings awesome street hotdogs and puts a lot of love into the fixings on top. Bring up the TB Lightning or bring your dog and you will be her favorite.
Pia's: I know, it's in Gulfport. Fantastic Italian food. Sit out on the patio if you can - there is a good red/white checkered tablecloth vibe out there. Saw someone get engaged there. It's that kind of place, immersive, familial, and delicious. The shank and lasagna were heavenly.
Paul's Landing: Worth it to check out the view of the pier and pool while at the Vinoy. Grab a drink and some very good American food here with a date, or for brunch.
Sauvignon Wine Locker: Pasta - yes. Wine - fuck yes. Half off bottle deals on Sunday I believe. Definitely a nicer place and a draw for the rich old snowbirds. I hear some local billionaires frequent the place. Kind of a cool entrance, walking down a (safe) alley before climbing the stairs to get to it.
Fortu: Clubby, upscale asian fusion spot. Expensive but also very good. The wagyu potstickers are great. Go here for date night and pay way too much for cool drinks and very good Asian food. But your body will be swaying from the music and sexy vibe.
Social Roost: Fun spot, feels kind of like you're walking into a Great Gatsby party. Creative and delicious dishes and the price is about right. It's loud and social and a high energy place so go with friends or a date on a Friday or Saturday.
Datz: Very solid bar / American / brunch food. I got a fried chicken salad and it was really good. I know there's more to try and I will do so.
Ford's Garage: Great burgers. If you're a car person, it's definitely worth checking out. Even the bathroom has a tire for a sink.
La V: Highly recommend this place. Vietnamese, French fusion. Good Pho, banh mi, and rolls. Get the beef bourgingon- like dish and soak up the broth with a toasty french baguette. Baby, you've got a stew goin'.
Calida: super small but absolutely delicious spot. A husband and wife cook and run the place, and they only have one other server who is equally awesome. They make you feel like family and live to serve people good food. Menu changes often based on ingredients that are in season. Had the short rib, Icelandic fish dish (forget the name), and duck panang. My gawd was it yummy. Great wine list too. Oh, they're only open three nights a week so make a rezzy in advance.
Bavaros: Pretty good pasta, a little pricey for the portion. Was a fan of Bolognese and penne vodka. Fun outdoor vibe with the sidewalk seating. Sometimes I'll bring carry out to cellarmasters.
Pizza Box: super tiny pizza spot but REALLY good meatballs and quality pizza made in a legit pizza oven. Get it with hot honey and a glass of wine.
Left Bank: Lit'rlly the best burger in town. The prices are exhorbinant for what you get, but the quality is hard to beat. $40 for beef bourgingon pissed me off, but again the food is really good. Go here for brunch and sip French rosé, get a croque madam, or take a date here for steak frites.
Il Ritorno: Upscale Italian. For the price, it was decent. Compared to olive garden it's excellent. Liked Bonu better. Pretty upscale spot for a date night. For the money, I think there are better spots. Please don't hurt me.
Bonu: Very refreshing vibe, open and airy and filled with cool lights and plants. Really good menu - lobster ravioli and penne vodka were great. Try some of their more creative dishes as well, you won't be disappointed.
Wild Child: I only went once for a date and I think we walked in after a fryer fire or something. Seriously, when we walked in we were assaulted with an intense funnel cake-like fryer smell and thin layer of smoke. Food was okay, I can't even remember what we got. I will agree to go back and try it again since I keep hearing good things and I'm pretty sure this was a one off experience. The date went well though. Not that you care.
Cassis: Solid French bistro with a restaurant and a quick eats side to it serving ice cream, chocolate, and pizza. Pretty banging.
Bella Brava: Great pizza! Was surprised how good since its in a touristy spot on Beach drive. Good pasta too. I think they have a good deal on Tuesdays or something.
Allelo: Upscale and very high quality Mediterranean food and wine list. Loved this place. Get the octopus, lamb Bolognese, and/or rabbit & glass of red and you won't be sorry.
Shrimp Store: Very good local, fresh seafood + rice, beans type place. Stop by for lunch and try the grouper. Fish & chips and hush puppies are great. Good prices too. Definitely good value.
Teak (Pier restaurant): I know the pier is touristy. But it's also gorgeous. The view of the water from the restaurant is unmatched. You can see Tampa Bay and st Pete skylines really well, watch the sailboats, and small planes fly by. The food is surprisingly good here. It's worth checking out even if you're a local.
Doc Ford's: I'd call this place upscale beach shack food. It's good quality, prices are slightly high as it is a more touristy spot on the pier. Good live music and good vibes.
Trophy Fish: I really enjoyed how fun and unique this place is. It's all outside but kind of covered, and really fun looking at night with all the lights and plants. Big bar you can sit around and you order seafood out of the truck/shack behind it. Have to say it was pretty expensive for what it was but definitely high quality.
The Studio Public House: Come here to see some great British rock and euro futbol memorabilia. Fish and chips are great, as is the shepherds pie.
Hook's on 9th: Sushi & Thai food with a great sushi menu. Great quality for not much money. $10 sushi and/or dishes for lunch. Get some takeout, try the beef bulgogi and a couple rolls. You won't be sorry.
Rumfish Grill (St Pete Beach): they have an awesome floor to ceiling aquarium right in the dining room. It's mesmerizing and a little bizarre watching the (huge) fish swim around while eating their cousin. Good seafood. Worth a visit.
Urban Stillhouse: Very upscale dining and I have to say the quality and experience were well worth the money. The building itself is unimpressive from the outside, yet when you walk in you are transported to the fanciest mountain / lodge / chalet type vibe you can think of. Multi level restaurant serving up great lamb, steak, and sides. Bonus points if you stop by Lolita's before.
Mazarros: A St Pete staple, and very crowded. But really good sandwiches made there and high quality Italian grocery options. Awesome wine room too - sometimes they do tastings. They do cooking classes here but haven't tried them yet. Worth checking out once, there's no place quite like it.
Lolita's: such a cool building they've moved in to, right next to the bike trail. Very artsy vibe since they share the space with Morean. Very creative dishes and cocktails, gorgeous patio on which to enjoy them.
Paradise Grill (pass-a-grille): the beach shack place right on the beach. I don't know how you can beat their grouper sammy, ice cold iced tea, and that beach view steps away from the water.
Ted Peter's: smoked fish isn't my favorite I admit, but even I liked it. I had some of their non-smoked fish and it was banging. Ask to go see where the smoking is done next door, it's a unique way they cook fish there. Been around for 80+ years.
Poppos : I live nearby and have been here a few times. Was described to me as a "local chipotle". I really wanted to like it. It's average. The portions are small for what you pay for. Their bowls, like literally the paper bowl itself, has a huge indent and is raised from the bottom so it fits a lot less food than you'd think. Staff was super kind though.
Drinks/Bar Only:
Intermezzo: This is the date night spot. Lots of love put into each drink. Nice jazz music. Visiting during Christmas is a must as they deck the place out. They're moving right nearby in the coming months.
Cellarmasters: My favorite watering hole in town. By now you know I enjoy wine. This place isn't your typical wine bar - it's divey, hipster, and awesome. Bring a sub or takeout here and listen to the incredibly cool wine staff pick and pour you the perfect glass. They have a great selection of old world for $20-40 a bottle.
No Vacancy: Outdoor Clubby place, usually a good spot for a DJ and to rip shots / crash bachelor or bachelorette parties.
Steve's: cash only no frills/old school bar. Go grab a bud light in a bottle and roll with the sticky floors. A staple on central ave that's been there forever.
Tryst: Decent bar. Had a boat load of tequila there.
The Landing: Pre or post Jannus show it's a must to continue your high octane weekend night with music and dancing. Bathroom lines get real long so wear a diaper or get in line early. Or try to bribe others in line with a fiver.
Bar Chica: If you like craft cocktails, it's a must visit. Classy bar slinging really cool drinks. You walk thru Bodega to get to it.
Lost and Found: Great spot for a drink and live music. Food truck and big backyard to enjoy a drink under the stars. They were playing Terminator 2 on the TV there which shows you how cool the place is.
Enigma: I typically see this suggested (as a joke) to out of towners asking for a low-key place to have a drink. Well, joke's on them. Enigma is so fun. It is a gay bar, but assuming you're progressive enough to deal with that the drinks, music, dancing, and people are fantastic.
It's all culminated in this. My favorite restaurant in town. Bin6South! ... You will spend $100+ and still walk out hungry. It is not a value play. It is a quality play. There are only 6 barstools and one table fitting 6 people. Reservations are not easy to come by. This place is the product of a retired couple who wanted to make awesome food, pour good wine, and have a communal feel for locals. It's not for everyone. But if you like a chef's table vibe, try it. You can shoot the shit with the chef, owner, and sommelier while they serve you amazing food you've never tried and pour you delicious wine. Their venison and pork shoulder are banging. They also have lots of fun culinary and wine events so check that out.
If you like coffee, the following places are a must try for either the quality of their espresso, local art, and/or vibe:
The Shop & Coffee House
Black crow
Intermezzo
Book & Bottle
Kawha
Bad mother
Fray's donut house for donuts and breakfast sammies too
Bonus Tampa restaurants:
Oxford Exchange: A Harry Potter feeling to it with good brunch food. It has a library quality to it, you feel like British royalty eating here. Great place for a cheeky day glass of rosé or bubbly. Take a walk along the river walk before or after.
Berns: A must try. It's been there for 80+ years. The building itself has such cool decorations and pictures on the walls, and each room has a different theme. While their steak is just okay, for the price comes with French onion soup and onion straws. The best part of Bern's is their wine list. My gawd. They have over 500,000 bottles on site and more in their other building / cellar. I think it's the largest restaurant owned wine collection in the world. Because there are so many bottles, they often can't keep up with pricing for all of them. We got three different bottles from 1975 - 1987 for under $50 each. Their dessert room, cellar tour, and kitchen tours are a must. Check out my post history as I have something in there from the wine subreddit.
Oh and not in Tampa but best Chinese food around is Zom Hee in Seminole. Get their NY strip dish. It's banging. Cool old school spot.
Places I want to try: Rococo, Beau & Mo's, El Cap, Cappy's, Harvey's, Sammy's, Hookin' Ain't Easy, The Chattaway, Brick & Mortar, naked farmer, violet stone, Jack's London Grille, Bascoms, food trucks (Go Stuff Yourself), Nueva Cantina's fundido burger, eat art love, German Knodle, Ceviche, The Burg, Sara's Kebab House, Baba / Barbouni
Agree? Disagree? Any other places you'd add to the list? I will likely keep editing this post as other places pop in my mind that I've forgotten, and/or I eat somewhere new. Cheers.

Price: 865.95 for 2 people (price for the two tasting menus, the N/A pairing and the beer pairing. I think it may have been the same rate regardless of whether you got a pairing? There are additional drinks of all types available for purchase in addition to your pairing as well
My dietary restriction that was fully accommodated: I recently started dipping my toes into the Autoimmune Protcol Diet for my chronic illnesses. It’s extremely restrictive- no gluten, dairy, eggs, legumes, seeds, nuts, processed sugars, and a few other things. I reached out to a ton of restaurants I wanted to go to at some point about whether this would be possible to accommodate fully expecting all no’s, and Herbfarm is one of the fine dining restaurants that were over the top reassuring in “we will make it happen or create a 100% new menu just for you”
I did not get a printout menu/write down the exact differences made for each dish to make the menu accessible for me, but there was many of them while still getting mostly the same dishes as my accompanying party. they explained and double checked with me on each dish, and they were all compliant. For the dishes that looked very different for my date with zero accommodations vs my own, I put pictures of both dishes next to each other
Setting: a beautiful farm in Woodinville, WA about 40 min from Seattle in one of the WA wine countries. Drove past a bajillion wineries and breweries on the way! There’s also a really lovely inn right next to Herbfarm where we stayed, great jacuzzis and fireplaces in the rooms! There’s also another fine dining restaurant Barking Frog next door, but I haven’t tried that
Herbfarm itself is a gorgeous property, I’m so glad we explored the building before our meal! From the huge cookbook collection to the wine cellars, and the dining room itself- beautiful! Before our meal we were also given a tour of the Herbfarm, met the pet pigs, and got insight into all the herbs they grow on property for their meals along with several veggies!
Dining experience: lovely musical accompaniment by a guitarist who trained at The Royal Observatory. Before the meal we got an explanation and speech from the chefs which was super interesting (all of the kitchen staff came out, felt like The Menu 😅). Service the whole meal was impeccable, some of the best I’ve ever had in all my dining experience
food: delicious, every dish (outside the geoduck, but I don’t always love geoduck😅. You could really taste how fresh and local all the ingredients were! Lots of things I’d never thought of pairing in these specific ways, and even with all my restrictions, so I can imagine how tasty the normal versions were! Especially impressed with the gluten free, usually the texture sucks on those but 🤌🤌
pairings: my date did really enjoy the beer pairing, I didn’t try any of it so I can’t speak to that, but maybe worth a try! I’d never seen a beer pairing before! He was also impressed with them having the Trappist Westlvleeen X11 beer (I know nothing about this/beer, so I can’t speak to how big of a thing that actually is). My N/A pairing was fantastic - (even when parts were altered for my AIP), each went so well with its dish, had such unique flavors too and avoided the trap of N/A pairings just being boring alcohol drinks made wirh N/A spirits
We were given to take home a small puzzle along with The Herbfarm Almanac which is their explanations of history plus a full breakdown of their yearly schedule. I was told they update the menu every 3 weeks or so along with special one off menus for specific themed dinners
Overall one of my favorite fine dining experiences of all time, fantastic in every way and I’d highly recommend if you’re in Washington. I hope when Michelin makes its way out to Seattle this is considered for stars

Hello everyone, I've planned a trip to Scandinavia for a couple weeks in July and was wondering if anyone had any suggestions for things to do or places to go. I will be in Copenhagen for 8 days, Stockholm for 3 days and Oslo for 3 days. My favorite things to do when traveling are eat, shop at thrift stores, antique stores, and book stores, and just finding unique sights and locations (I prefer nature-sightings, such as flower fields, over building-sightings). I like finding niche little shops (for instance, I went to a shop once while traveling where everything was frog-themed and I loved it). I also like workshops or events where you can "make your own" things, like baskets or pottery. A friend of mine who just did an exchange program in Copenhagen said that restaurants are really expensive and that it was significantly cheaper to cook at home. However, I won't be able to really cook in the places I'm staying. Any affordable and delicious food options will be great! Also, suggestions for "must-see" places will be great, too, since I don't know when I'll be back to that side of the globe! For travel, does anyone have any suggestions for getting around the cities? Is there a bus pass or train pass that I should get and can it be purchased in advanced? How do most people get around in these cities? As a note, I can walk for very long periods of time, but have trouble climbing up hills or inclines due to a ballet-related injury, so suggesting places that would not require too steep of an incline, or only short periods of incline would be great. Finally, are there any cultural things that I should take into account or anticipate when I arrive to these areas? I'm from America, but am ethnically Southeast Asian (and look it). Is there anything I should be worried about? Are there things I should do to be respectful of the Scandinavian culture? ANY suggestions are welcome and I appreciate so much your time reading through my post and offering anything at all. I still have a couple months to plan, but it will be great to have things sorted out sooner rather than later. Thanks again!

The Fantasy Springs expansion at Tokyo DisneySea has been really exciting to see, and I love that Tangled now has a ride, but it's got me wondering why so many of the Disney Renaissance films still don't have rides. I know those films and characters get plenty of park representation in other ways; such as restaurants, shows, theming, walk-around characters, and merchandise. But I know I can't be the only one who visited Disney World for the first time as a little kid and was disappointed to find that there was no Lion King ride.
The Little Mermaid ride didn't exist until the 2010s, and the Beauty and the Beast ride didn't exist until the 2020s. Aladdin only has a Dumbo the Flying Elephant clone (and a carousel at DisneySea), and we still don't have any rides at all for movies like Mulan, Hercules, Tarzan, or the aforementioned Lion King. (The lack of rides for Notre Dame and Pocahontas is more understandable due to their darker subject matter; though Notre Dame is still one of my favorite Disney films, and it currently gets less park rep than Pocahontas does).
As a side note, I know Lilo and Stitch came out after the Renaissance, but it honestly surprises me that that movie doesn't have a ride either, considering how popular Stitch is. The Stitch's Great Escape animatronic was fantastic, and it would be a crime not to use it again.
I love dark rides, personally, as a huge fan of animatronics, and Disney's latest character animatronics have been very impressive. The Tangled and especially the Princess and the Frog ones look amazing, and I'm happy to see the newer properties like Frozen, Zootopia, and Moana getting plenty of love, but the Renaissance films are still iconic today, and I'd love to see that same treatment be given to some of those films too. Even a themed coaster would be better than nothing. I've heard rumors of a potential Lion King flume ride in the talks, and as someone who loved Splash Mountain as a kid, that honestly sounds like a dream come true to me.
But what do you think? Maybe a Cave of Wonders coaster featuring a few animatronics a la Hagrid's at Universal? Or a Labors of Hercules ride featuring some monsters from Greek myths? Or maybe a Mulan dark ride that takes you through the whole story? There's so much untapped potential here.

What a nightmare of a weekend and just downright tacky. Dumb ass Yankees dressing up in southern garb to cosplay as plantation owners. Next year I’m just getting the hell out of dodge cuz I can’t handle this overt display of whiteness.
I’m an actor and studied at Murray State in Kentucky on a partial scholarship via a Pell Grant, so I got to witness how fucking annoying and racist derby fans can be, dressing up like they’re about to call someone “boy” and probably don’t even know what year Grindstone won the derby or when he died (last year). The restaurant I bar back at in Midtown East had a Derby party and all these mostly white and a handful of Asians who were dating the pompous white guys triggered me.
One idiot I overheard kept saying “ah I think I heard about that on Rogan…” One joked about “eating ass” which made me gag and was crude in the situation in front of women (many of whom laughed).
That was just this weekend in NY...
One party down when I was in KY, some asshole challenged me to drink 15 mint juleps and i did. He only drank four and I vomited up a bunch of mint out behind the McDermott coal fields and got stuck in a bush, where they found me just after midnight perched up like a tree frog and those mean spirited pricks called me both Tree Frog or Minty the whole six years I did my degree.
I swear I’m going out of town next derby and avoiding these shitheel racists and trust fund kids.
Edit: Grindstone died in 2022, not last year (I keep getting it mixed up)

Vent but maybe advice needed: I just bought the frog and snail restaurant and everything was going fine until level 15 when the snails were introduced. I can’t get the snails into the freaking oven! Either my phone screen is too small or my fingers are too big but wtf?! Anyone else have that issue, is there anyway I can fix it? 😅

Hello. I've (34m) been making a lot of changes in my life over the course of the past year and I've found it very fulfilling. I'm interested to see if anyone else has had this approach to minimalism and how it's worked for them.
I've been interested in minimalism as a concept for the majority of my life, but as someone who grew up very poor I tend to spend money on things I like as a way to celebrate my success in escaping the life I had. Not to mention I am married to a lovely woman who does not share my interest in minimalism but I do what I can for myself. That being said I am a minimalist in a lot of aspects of my life, so I am free to be a maximalist in others. Now before I lose anyone let me explain:
I started cutting out things in my life that I personally didn't care about, limiting the amount of time and money needed to maintain those things, so that I can spend my time and money on the things that actually bring me joy.
For example. I don't give a fat frogs ass about clothes. I'm a competitive Strength Athlete. I spend most of my free time training and in athletic clothes. As a bigger framed person I have a hard time finding clothes that fit me comfortably and after years of trying things and being disappointed I found what fits me comfortably and well, and I no longer buy anything different. I own a few pairs of shorts, joggers, shirts and a single hoodie. Socks and underwear. One pair of sandals and one pair of shoes (Though I spend the majority my waking life barefoot if I can help it). Everything else is unnecessary for the life I lead. I don't go out to fancy restaurants. I don't go anywhere where my clothing would be an issue so I don't worry about it otherwise.
I use a single pair of chopsticks and one reasonably sized bowl for the majority of my meals. I have access to more but 9 times out of 10 I don't need it. I clean them after each meal and I don't let anything sit in/on them. I have a single deep pan I do majority of my cooking in and a rice cooker and basic wooden utensils. As far as other home goods I sit on the floor while I play or hang out with my son and if I could I'd rid myself of my couch altogether. I no longer use a pillow in bed and a few times a week I'll actually sleep on the floor. Again if I could I'd replace my bed with a tatami mat.
I shave my head with a straight razor and haven't changed my style in years in that regard.
Even in terms of Digital Minimalism I removed myself from social media except Reddit. I started a sub to use as a training log and other than that I have very little interested in wasting my time doom scrolling .
Now, here's where I might lose some of you and I am ready for hate if it comes my way. That minimalist part of my life gives me plenty of disposable income to buy myself things that bring me joy. Namely, I am an avid action figure collector. I hang them on the wall and I love it. I spend my rest time watching cartoons with my son and I collect toys from the shows I share with him from when I was a kid (TMNT, He-Man, Batman, etc for those at all curious). Streaming keeps me from buying physical hard copies of shows, BUT I also collect comics and books as well. In the past year as my other possessions have been donated or disposed of, my collection has grown.
Also as a Strength Athlete I have a growing home gym that I now have more money to put towards equipment and weight. Bring strong makes me feel useful and makes my life feel fulfilled.
Again that's probably counterintuitive to a lot of your lifestyles but I brings me immeasurable happiness and I have no intention of stopping.
Does anyone else practice minimalism in this way? Limiting one part of your life to be able to invest in others? For me personally I think I've found my recipe for a fulfilling life and I'm happy in ways I've never felt.
Edit: Added examples as I thought of them

The pain was the worst thing`Dominick Mason had ever known…and he knew what it felt like to die. It felt like his brain was in a blender, being chopped to liquid for a Jeffery Dahmer smoothie and though it seemed melodramatic, he imagined he could feel himself losing brain cells by the minute. The sun, Merrick told him, would not burn him, but it would decay him faster, so sleep or rest during the day. With the sick, throbbing agony in the center of his brain, however, that was impossible. He spent most of the day curled up on his side, hugging his knees, and moaning. He had flashbacks to dying in his apartment, and that made things even worse. The room became too small, too close, the air too stale. His heart, filled with the blood of last night’s meal, pounded in his chest, and he went from slightly chilly to hot and feverish as blood was forced through his circulatory system. It mixed with the embalming fluid and left him feeling full and constipated. He didn’t want to get up, but he also didn’t want to go on lying there. He was the definition of miserable.
Before long, the pain became too great and he got up to pace, pressing his hands to the sides of his head and gritting his teeth. Merrick, who slept very little if at all, sat in his chair and watched, trying his best to talk him through it. “It’ll be over soon,” Merrick said. “The pain receptors in your brain are the first to go. When they burn out, you won’t feel anything.”
“When?” Dom asked, his voice raising with the tide of pain.
“A couple days?”
“A couple days???”
“The pain will lessen gradually,” Merrick said, “this is the worst of it.”
Dom believed that this was, indeed, the worst of it, but he doubted it would lessen gradually. For the rest of the day, the pain got worse and worse until every light blinded him, every sound turned his stomach, and the smell of anything made his gorge rise. The cloying smell of the embalming fluid, the light but unmistakable odor of dead flesh, and the scent of stale blood sitting in decomposing stomachs made him want to vomit, but he was afraid to. He didn’t think he could handle the sight of blood rushing from his mouth and splattering the floor. He still possessed enough of his facilities, he believed, to go insane.
Pain has a way of darkening one’s mood, and by the time the sun began to set, Dom was in the most sour mood possible. Even Merrick’s calm, fatherly voice was beginning to get on his nerves. When he took the oath to him the day before (or was it the day before that?), he turned his faith and trust over to Merrick entirely. He was finally accepted, included, finally had the love and fellowship that, in the pit of his soul, he had always wanted. Merrick understood him, Merrick was kind to him.
But deep down, Dom realized that he didn’t fully trust him. He said that his brain didn’t rot because he was “lucky.” That sounded like some bullshit to Dom. Why wasn’t Joe a blithering idiot too? Was he lucky as well? Did lightning strike in the same place twice? In life, people had done nothing but hurt and lie to Dom. Why would death be any different? He thought back to the strange liquid that always seemed to leak from Merrick’s nose, and Joe’s. He thought it was embalming fluid, but it never leaked from his own nose, or from anyone else’s. He tried to tell himself that it was far too soon to judge, but once he began to doubt something, his mind raced away. He felt a twinge of guilt, as Merrick had done absolutely nothing to deserve his doubt, but goddamn it, his head was on fire and he wanted it to stop. Anything to make it stop.
Just after sundown, the music began as Club Vlad opened for the night. It throbbed in the center of Dom’s head and made him want to claw his eyes out. When it became too much for him, he slipped away and stumbled into the sultry summer night. He came out in the alley running behind the club, clutching his head and breathing through bared teeth. He staggered, bumped into a metal trash can, and roared at the top of his lungs, as if he could purge himself of the pain by screaming.. His voice echoed and came back to him, making the pain worse.
Merrick was lying. He knew it. People always lied to him. His brain was rotting and PEOPLE WERE LYING! Flashing with anger, he slammed his fist into the brick wall of a Chinese restaurant. He barely felt anything so he did it again and again until his hand was lumpy and shaking. He sat heavily on the ground and pressed his hands to his head. It felt like maggots were burrowing into his brain, and he was suddenly terrified that they really were. He needed to stop this awful pain, but how?
An idea came to him.
The funeral home.
Maybe there was something there.
He was on his feet and lumbering there before the thought had even finished reverberating through his mind. It was a long shot, but he was desperate. On the way there, he stuck to the shadows, staying out of the light cast by the streetlamps and avoiding people. When he passed them, he kept his head down. When he reached the funeral home, he went to the back door where he and Jessie had gone the other day. He tried it, and it opened.
Inside, he bounced off the walls like a pinball, knocking over an end table and tearing at the flesh of his head, pulling it away in long, gray strips. He panted like a wild animal, his body a raging tempest of emotions. It was reaching a crescendo, he thought, his brain was about to go supernova. The world dimmed, things got really echoy. The young man he’d picked the embalming fluid up from was there, looking scared.
Flashing, Dom grabbed him by his shirt and slammed him against the wall, knocking a painting of a flowery field to the carpet. Everything seemed to go in slow mo. “How does Merrick keep his brain from rotting?” Dom heard himself demanding from far away. “How does he keep the pain away?”
The man trembled. “I-I-”
Dom slammed him again. “Tell me or I’ll make you like me.”
“No!” the man wailed. He shook his head from side to side, his eyes wet with fear.
“How?”
“He-He uses a solution,” the man stammered. “Some kind of special thing. It preserves his brain. That’s all I know.”
An idea occurred to Dom.
Holding the man by the back of his neck, Dom dragged him into the embalming room and pushed him against the table. His head felt like it was swelling. Hot, screaming, getting ready to explode. He looked around, found the embalming machine, and grabbed the hose. There was a sharp tip on it so that you could jam it into a body. He held it in his hand, hesitating for just a moment before pressing it to his temple. The man watched in horror as Dom slowly shoved the tip into his head. It tore his flesh, broke through his skull, and sank into his brain. He felt no pain, only pressure, but cried out anyway. His eyes rolled up into his head and a shudder went through his body.
“Turn it on!” he yelled.
“That’s not what he -”
“TURN IT ON!”
Starting, the man turned the machine on. Cold embalming fluid squirted directly into Dom’s brain. Almost at once, the pain began to ebb away, replaced only by a fuzzy sense of numbness. His knees buckled and he sank to the floor, looking for all the world like an addict taking a hit of his favorite substance after a long and trying day. Fluid leaked from his nose, ears, and eyes and dripped down the back of his throat.
The man waited for a long time, then turned the machine off.
The pain was gone.
At least for now.
“Tell me again,” Dom said.
The man did. Merrick used a special preserving agent to keep his brain intact. Joe, the man suspected, got it as well. So Merrick had lied to him.
Dom felt betrayed.
And angry.
Leaving the man (Dom realized that he didn’t even know his name), he walked back to Club Vlad, his hands fisted in his pockets. All his life, he had been hurt, lied to, and ignored. All his life, people had done wrong to him. And all those years, he just took it.
He resolved not to be so accepting in death.
At last, he was going to stop being a sniveling little bitch and stand up for himself.
When he reached Club Vlad, he slammed through the back door and took the stairs two at a time. At the top, he called out Merrick’s name. The old man was sitting in his chair, being attended to by Jessie and Matt. He looked startled when Dom came in. “You lied to me,” Dom said, stalking over to his benefactor.
“What are you talking about?” Merrick asked, doing his best to sound innocent.
“You lied to me!” Dom screamed. He bent over and got so close to Merrick’s face that he could have kissed him. “You told me there was no way to save my brain, but that’s not true. You’re pumping your head full of shit and letting the rest of us rot.”
A dark shadow flickered across Merrick’s face. “Watch your tone when you talk to me,” he said. His voice was low, menacing.
“Fuck you,” Dom said. “I should k -”
Suddenly, Dom was being grabbed from behind and yanked back, an arm around his neck. He cried out in alarm as Joe swung him around and slammed him face first into the wall. He heard his nose crunch, felt his teeth shatter. Next, Joe wrestled him to the glitter-sprinkled floor and wedged his knee between his shoulder blades.
Merrick watched with a sneer of disgust, his hands gripping the arms of his chair. He wheeled himself over, Jessie holding his IV stand steady and following behind. “Listen, you son of a bitch,” Merrick said, “you’re lucky to be a part of this family.”
Cold fear filled the pit of Dom’s stomach, yet he wouldn’t back down, couldn’t back down. He had lived his entire life like a mouse in a burrow, he wasn’t about to live his entire death the same way.
“Fuck your family,” he said defiantly. “And fuck you.”
Merrick’s face darkened and he sat back in his chair. He looked at Jessie and nodded. She went away and came back a moment later holding something in her hand. Dom’s eyes widened when he saw what it was.
A wooden stake, one end honed to a razor point.
Why they had one of those lying around, Dom didn’t know; it’d be like Superman keeping a piece of kryptonite on the mantle over the fireplace. Merrick directed Max and Matt to hold Dom’s arms down/ Joe pivoted, kneeling on his head now so that Dom’s back was exposed. Dom’s heart slammed with terror and tremors raced through his body.
“Is this what you want, Dominick?” Merrick asked. “To die? To truly die?”
Dom swallowed hard. No, it wasn’t what he wanted. He wanted to live, to love, to have a family one day. He wanted a happy, normal life, the life TV and social media had been promising him since he was a little boy.
But all of that went out the window the night he died in his little apartment. There was no life anymore, just a grotesque parody of life. What was there for him other than death? Clinging desperately onto life for decades like Merrick? Stuffing himself full of embalming fluid and moth balls? Grinding for one more minute just so he could sit hooked up to a machine?
Dom spoke.
“What?” Merrick asked, not having heard.
Dom licked his lips. “Just fucking do it.”
For a moment, nothing happened. Expectation hung in the air. Finally, breaking the tension, Merrick nodded to Jessie. Kneeling down, she brought the stake up, and Dom closed his eyes.
This was it.
He braced himself for death.
Jessie brought the stake down just as a shot rang out, deafening in the small space. Her head whipped back, embalming fluid, skull fragments, and gray, sickly pieces of brain showering from the back of her head. She flopped back and landed on the floor with a sickening thud.
A woman cop, her black uniform in stark contrast to the burning white light, stood in the doorway to the hall, her gun drawn. Everyone did, indeed, freeze, more out of surprise than respect for authority. They all looked at her, their dead mouths agape, resembling children who’d been caught doing something wrong.
“Everyone on the ground!” she barked.
No one knew what to do. They hadn’t expected to be raided by the police so had not prepared. She jerked her gun and everyone instinctively flinched. “On the ground!” she repeated. To Max: “You too, bone boy.”
The first one to react was Joe. He sprang at her like a big, undead frog. She brought the gun around and fired, but he was already crashing into her. The shot went wild and struck the IV bag next to Merrick; he ducked and let out a sound of fear. The others rushed her, and Dom got quickly to his feet. Jessie lay on the floor, her mouth open in a silent scream and her bony fingers frantically examining the ragged hole in the center of her forehead. For a moment, he was frozen; everything was happening too fast. Then, when Merrick saw him and cried, “Stop him!, he came alive. Jessie tried to grab at his leg, but he kicked her hand away and stomped on it like it was a giant spider. On the other side of the room, Matt, Joe, and Max had forced the cop to the ground. Perhaps excited by all the action, perhaps just hungry, they began to tear her apart. She howled in pain, and the last thing Dom saw before he fled was her open, blood-filled mouth. Her eyes were filled with pain…with terror.
After that, Dom ran.
***
When the interloper was dead, Merrick directed Joe and Matt to dispose of the body. “Get rid of it,” he said wearily and rubbed his temples, “make sure it isn’t found.”
They rolled her into a carpet from the office, and the way her feet stuck out may have been comical under other circumstances.
Goddamn it, this was bad. Merrick’s entire philosophy rested on avoiding detection. He had done well in that regard. Whereas other vampires had attacked their villages and gotten themselves dug from the ground and staked, he had made it four decades. He never shat where he ate, and there is no bigger turd than killing a cop. They might dawdle on all the boys who’d gone missing - taken because their blood was stronger and more robust than the blood of girls - but they would not take a cop dying lightly at all.
Merrick owned various businesses around the country. He and the others would simply move on. Tomorrow night, they would disappear into the night. They had done it before and they would likely do it again. Once things were settled at their new base of operations, he would have Joe killed for all the trouble he’d caused.
And Dom?
Let him go.
The little rat wouldn’t last a month on his own.
“Jessie?”
Jessie sat against the wall, gazing into space.
“Jessi…start packing. We’re leaving tomorrow.”
She didn’t move, didn’t seem to hear. The shot had all but lobotomized her.
Damn it.
Joe backed the van up to the back door of Club Vlad, and then helped Matt carry the carpet-rolled body down the stairs. They loaded it in and closed the back doors. Together, they drove around looking for a place to dump it. Merrick wanted it to go unfound, but Joe doubted there was anywhere isolated enough in the city. On a whim, he drove to Washington Park, a vast expanse of green trees and shadows. There was a large pond there. It seemed the best option. They were leaving tomorrow anyway, so did it really matter?
Joe backed the van to a railing overlooking the dark water and put it in park. He and Matt got out, fetched the body, and carried it to the railing. They lifted and heaved it over. It splashed. Thus, they rid themselves of Vanessa Rodregiez.
***
Bruce sat anxiously up in his easy chair and waited for his cell to ring.
Parked in front of the TV by warm lamplight, a beer wedged between his legs, he’d been watching the 11’o’clock news when the phone rang. He picked it up and it was Vanessa. “Hey,” she said, “I think I found our body?”
“Which one?” Bruce asked and took a drink. “We have a lot of those these days.”
“Dominick Mason.”
Bruce sat forward in his chair. “Dead Dom? Where?”
“He just came out of a funeral home, ironically enough.”
“That sounds about right,” Bruce said. “Where are you now?”
“I’m following him east on Central.”
“Are you sure it’s him?” Bruce asked.
“I think so, but I’m not sure. I’ll call you back when I’m done.”
Bruce sat the phone aside and waited.
And waited.
And waited.
At some point, he fell asleep sitting up, his head lulled to one side and his mouth open. He snorted himself awake, rubbed his eyes, and sat up. He checked his phone and was perturbed to see that it was past 2am.
Vanessa hadn’t called.
He dialed her number and let the phone ring until it went to voicemail. Sighing, he ended the call, then waited a few minutes and called again.
Still no answer.
It was possible she had forgotten. Maybe the guy turned out to not be Dead Dom after all. She followed some random guy around, realized it, and that was that. Hell, she was probably too embarrassed to call and tell him about it.
Something told him that wasn’t right, however.
There was something else going on here.
Something…darker.
Just before 3am, his phone rang. He snatched it off the end table next to the chair and answered it. It was Burt, the night sargent. “Rodriguez is missing,” he said simply.
Bruce’s heart sank. “Missing?”
“Yeah, she hasn’t checked in for hours and she isn’t answering calls.”
“I’m on my way,”
Bruce tore through the house, pulling on his uniform, socks, and shoes in less time than it took a Daytona 500 pit crew to service a car. In ten minutes he was speeding down 787, the Albany skyline rising in the distance. As he hurried to the station, he thought back to his last conversation with Vanessa. She’d found Dom the Dead Man, the “corpse” who’d scared Ed Harris out of a 20 year career. Despite all their talk about vampires and the living dead, Bruce didn’t believe it, not really. Even so, he was sure that Dominick Mason had done something to Vanessa.
He checked in at the station before doing anything else. They had triangulated Vanessa’s last known location via cell towers. Cops were already out searching the streets for her. Bruce went out as well, intending to start from her last known position and work his way east on Central. The closest funeral home was Tebbutt and Frederick on Central. There was also Lasak & Gigliotti on North Allen Street. Bruce didn’t know which one Vanessa had seen Dom come out of, so he checked both.
Both were deserted at this hour.
Undeterred, Bruce drove up and down Central Ave. At one point, he noticed a shape in an alleyway that looked human. He hit the brakes, jumped out, and pointed his gun at it. “Freeze!”
An old wino stepped out of the darkness. “Alright, you got me,” he said, hands up. “I started COVID. It was an accident, I swear.”
Bruce sighed and put his gun away.
For two more hours, Bruce searched the streets of Albany for Vanessa. At 4am, he spotted a squad car abandoned in the rear parking lot of an abandoned gas station on lower Lark Street. He called it in and the desk sergeant confirmed that it was the one Vanessa had signed out that night.
Still there was no sign of Vanessa herself.
Just after dawn, as the city came alive and CDTA buses began lumbering up and down the streets, Bruce got a call on his cell. “A jogger found a body in Washington Park.”
Bruce was in his personal car. He had no bubble light, no siren. Even so, he sped through the streets like he did, blowing through red lights and stop signs with little care to himself or anyone else. When he got to Washington Park, he found an army cops by the pond, the scene cordoned off with yellow crime scene tape. He slammed on the brakes, threw open the door, and jumped out without even turning off the engine.
The body was rolled up in a carpet and lying on the bank. Two beat cops unrolled it at Bruce’s direction. “We should wait for -” one of them started, but Bruce cut him off.
“Do it.”
They compiled, and at the carpet’s center, like a rotten cream filling, was the body of Vanessa Rodregiuez. Her head was tilted to one side, her eyes wide and staring. Her throat had been mangled and ripped away, her head nearly severed. Even in the black and red mess, Bruce could make out the teeth marks and puncture wounds. They may have looked like something else to anyone else who saw them, but he knew, in that moment, what they were dealing with.
A sharp pang of horror sliced through him, and his knees went weak.
“Jesus Christ,” one of the beat cops drew.
Bruce fell to, rather than knelt on, one knee. He bent over the body, a mixture of horror and grief welling his throat. He wanted to reach out, to comfort her in death, but he stayed his hand. Instead, he visually examined the body. She had bruises on her face, defensive wounds on her hands, and her gun was gone. Whoever had attacked her, she put up a fight.
Something glinted on her pants.
“What’s that?” one of the cops asked.
“I dunno,” the other replied, “but it’s all over the carpet.”
Indeed, there were glinty little specks all over it, winking like mocking eyes. Nice work, eh? We really fucked her up, didn’t we? Wink wink.
“It looks like…”
The other cop cut him off. “Glitter.”
Bruce flashed back to his visit to Club Vlad the other day.
There had been glitter everywhere.
Bruce stood up.
He had work to do.
***
Instead of going back to the station to start his shift, Bruce went to Lowes. There, he bought a mallet, a gas can, and a dozen sticks of wood. An employee in a blue vest used a machine to sharpen them to a wicked point and he took his purchases to the car. Next, he drove over to the Mobil station and filled the gas can. He was so hellbent on revenge that he sprang for premium, the good stuff. No expense shall be spared.
His final stop was at a Catholic church. He filled a canteen with holy water from the marble font by the door, then swiped a crucifix from the wall. He stopped by the station, went inside, and grabbed a black duffle bag with POLICE written across the front in yellow. He opened the gun cabinet in his office, took out a shotgun, and loaded it with shells. He grabbed a handful from the box and stuffed them into his pocket.
He was just finishing up when Bertha came in. “There you are,” she spat, “I’ve waited long enough for you to do something. I demand -”
Bruce shoved the duffle bag into her arms. “Make yourself useful.”
“What?” she demanded.
“We’re going to get your granddaughter,” Bruice lied. Kind of.
Bertha’s demeanor changed. “Good. It’s about time. I was starting to think you were a complete incompetent.”
Bruce didn’t answer. Outside, he plucked the bag out of Bertha’s hands and tossed it into the backseat. He slipped behind the wheel and Bertha sat in the passenger seat. “Where are we going?” she asked.
“Club Vlad,” Bruce said and started the engine.
“I want all of them arrested.”
“Yes, ma’am,” Bruce said.
She barked orders the entire way there. Bruce was so deep in his thoughts that he barely heard her. The image of Vanessa’s ruined throat and terror-twisted face haunted him, and he felt a lump forming in his throat. Hot tears filled his eyes but he blinked them back and forced himself to calm down.
I’ll cry when I’m done killing, he thought.
A few minutes later, he pulled to the curb in front of Club Vlad. It was a hot and sunny day and the place seemed even more ominous because of it. The windows were black, the front cast in perpetual shadows by the old marquee from when it used to be a theater. The place was surely closed, but Bruce could hear music still playing from inside, some techno dance bullshit. “Alright,” he said, “let’s go.”
Getting out, he slung the dufflebag over his shoulder and carried the shotgun, the canteen full of holy water clasped to his belt. Bertha carried the gas can, looking confused. “Why do we need this?” she asked.
“We’re burning the place down.”
Bertha blinked in surprise…then an evil grin carved across her face. “That’ll show the bastards.”
Unlike last time, the door was locked. Bruce used the butt of the shotgun to break the glass, then reached inside and unlocked the door, being careful not to cut himself. This was the point of no return. What he had in mind would probably get him kicked off the force or even thrown in jail - and we all know how tough jail can be for a former barnaclehead. The memory of Vanessa’s contorted face pushed him on, however.
He’d suffer any consequences he needed to just so long as he got the sons of bitches who did this to her.
Inside, the club was cool and cave-like. Strobe lights flashed, on and off, black and white, dazzling Bruce’s eyes. The bartender was at his station, cleaning up from the night before. When he saw Bruce and Bertha come in, he started. Bruce pointed the shotgun at him. “Don’t fucking move,” he commanded.
The bartender hesitated, then reached for something under the bar.
The shotgun kicked in Bruce’s hands, and the bartender flew back, turning as he crashed into the barback. Bottles, glasses, and mugs crashed to the floor along with the bartender. Bruce racked the gun, and the shell flew out. He moved low and fast now, expecting to be swarmed by vampires, living thugs who worked for vampires, or vampire thugs who worked for themselves.
Though the shot had been like thunder, no one came.
Bruce had no idea where to go, but he imagined that vampires were naturally gravitate to the lowest part of the building. Was there a basement? Shit, he should have looked up the building plans at city hall. Damn, this is what happens when you go off half-cocked. He searched around a bit, opening doors and sweeping the rooms beyond with the shotgun. He found no basement, only stairs leading up. “Stay close,” he said to Bertha.
In the lead, Bruce crept up the stairs, the flashlight on the shotgun providing a cone of clean, white light. At the top of the stairs, he went right, and came to an office and a store room. Backtracking, and bumping into a bungling Bertha, he went into the next room. It was large and open with a vaulted ceiling, almost like a ballroom. Here the same strobe lights throbbed on and off, making him dizzy. Was this to dazzle prospective vampire hunters?
Either way, this was the place. Bodies lay strewn across the floor, some curled up on their sides and others in the classic vampire pose: Flat on their backs with their hands laced over their chests. In the center, like the sun to the planets, Merrick Garvis lay slumped back in his wheelchair, his neck exposed for any potential assassin to come and cut. Not that it would kill him. At least Bruce didn’t think it would.
“They’re all dead,” Bertha whispered. She looked around and gasped. “There’s Jessie.”
Jessie lay on her back, her hands folded on her chest. She had a ragged bullet hole in the center of her forehead. “Oh, God,” Bertha wavered, “someone shot her.”
He hoped it was Vanessa. And he hoped it fucking hurt.
Looking around, Bruce couldn’t find Dominick Mason. Was he the one who killed Vanessa? Was it a group effort? He wanted the little son of a bitch bad, but it looked like he’d have to go on without him. They didn’t have much time.
Unshouldering the duffle bag, he knelt down and rummaged around. “Start splashing that gas on the bodies,” he said.
“But -”
“Just do it,” he snapped.
There must have been a harder edge in his voice than normal, because Bertha jumped and did as she was told. She upended the can and began to splash gasoline onto the sleeping forms, the smell of it acrid and strong.
Taking out a stake and the mallet, Bruce went over to Merrick and knelt down. He gripped the stake in one hand and placed it firmly against Merrick’s chest. He brought the mallet up and hesitated, the gravity of what he was doing finally reaching him. What if he was wrong? What if -
Merrick’s head whipped up and their eyes locked.
Too late.
Bruce brought the mallet down as hard as he could. The stake drove deep into Merrick’s heart, and the vampire let out a howling screech that rang through the chamber like the cry of a banshee. His bony fingers clawed at the stake and his head whipped from side to side, his back arching and his robe coming open. In the quick strobe pattern, Bruce was shocked to see that his body was little more than a wood frame, chicken wire, and cotton balls. His blacked heart was hidden behind a screen of mesh that the stake had easily torn through. It throbbed, seemingly in time with the strobe lights, and Merrick let out another wail.
Bertha screamed, and Bruce jumped to his feet.
The vampires, drawn by their master’s cries of distress, were rising to their feet. Two, four, six of them, pale and ethereal like ghosts in a gothic mansion. They came toward Merrick, and Bruice fell back a step. The old man had gone still and lay slumped to one side, his eyes open and his mouth slack, embalming fluid leaking from the corner of his lips. Jessie bent over him and touched his face. Though she moved like a zombie, with no human emotion, Bruce was crazily sure that it was a touch of tenderness and love. Merrick didn’t stir.
He was dead.
Jessie looked at him. Yellow liquid leaked from her eyes like tears. Instead of attacking him, she turned on her grandmother and slammed her against the wall. Bertha screamed and dropped the can. It landed on its side, its contents sloshing out onto the floor. A man that resembled the pictures Bruce had seen of Joe Rossi only deader rushed him, slamming into him and knocking the shotgun aside. It hit the floor and skidded away. Joe grabbed Bruce around the throat and squeezed. Still the lights flashed, off and on, off and on. The walls thrummed with the mechanized beat of dance music, pierced only by Bertha’s screams as Jessie ripped out her throat.
Joe leaned in, his fangs wicked and glowing in the light. Bruce clawed at the monster’s face, tearing away strips of dead flesh. Joe turned his head to the side, and Bruce kneed him in the groin. Even dead, getting kicked in the balls hurt like hell, apparently. Joe’s grip loosened and Bruce was able to shove him off. Bruce unclasped the canteen and frantically screwed the cap off as Joe recovered. Joe sprang at him again, and Bruce splashed him in the face.
A sound like sizzling meat filled the air, and Joe screamed at the top of his lungs. He pressed his hands to his face and danced around the room, his skin liquifying and oozing between his fingers. The others were coming now, led by a terrible skeletal thing. Bruce scooped the shotgun off the floor, brought it around, and fired. The blast hit the thing dead center, tearing it literally in half. The top half flew back, an all too human look of surprise on its face, and the bottom half fell over with a wet thud. Another vampire came at, and Bruce slammed it across the face with the butt of the gun. He heard its jaw crack, saw teeth flying.
Bertha lay dead on the floor, Jessie bent over her. The smell of Bertha’s blood attracted the others, who seemed to forget about Bruce, Merrick, and everything else. Joe was on his knees, wailing in pain, and the skeletal thing was pulling itself toward Bertha. A feeding frenzy broke out as vampires fought to get a piece of her the way piglets might fight over their mother’s teat. Bruce watched in a mixture of horror and fascination, but recovered himself. He grabbed the gas can from the floor and dumped the rest of its contents on Merrick’s body, the feeding vampires’ backs, and the floor, using the last of it to make a little trail to the door. He tossed the can aside, bent down, and stuck a match.
A huge, fiery whump filled the room, and fire streaked along the trail. The vampires all went up in a huge ball of flames, and fire shot up Merrick’s body, catching his robe, his hair, and the wooden frame that had kept him semi upright for God knows how long. Letting out inhuman screams, the vampires broke from Bertha’s corpse. One stumbled around, bounced off the wall, and fell; another toddled toward Bruce before falling to its knees. The half skeleton kept drinking from Bertha’s neck even as it burned.
The heat was enormous, baking. Bruce backed away, and the last thing he saw before smoke obscured his vision was Merrick Garvis.
He was literally melting.
***
Dominick Mason tried to go home, but he no longer had a home. All of his worldly possessions sat on the sidewalk in front of his building, discarded coldly as easily. His key didn’t work in his door and there was a FOR RENT sign on it. Why would it be any other way? He was dead. Sooner or later, everyone forgets you when you’re dead, and all the things you held so dear wind up in the trash. It was a hard pill to swallow, but most people aren’t around to see it after they die.
He was.
From his building, he walked east toward Washington Park. In the distance, thick, black smoke billowed into the air, and sirens rose. He barely noticed and wouldn’t have cared even if he did. No more rubbernecking for him. That was for the living.
The pain that had plagued him so the previous day came back, only less this time. Maybe he was imagining it, but it was getting harder to think. Not that he cared, really. What was there to think about anyway? How he had no one to mourn or miss him? How he died and not one single person, except for maybe his mother, cared, or even noticed? How he had done nothing with his life? Even to the women he’d slept with, what was he? Just another dating app hookup. They probably didn’t even remember his name.
Merrick had been right about one thing. Death was easy. It was life that was hard…life that hurt.
With that in mind, Dominick made his way to Washington Park. It was a vast and deep place with many small caves and thickets. Kids played on the playground, their cries of laughter scenting the still air. It had grown cloudy and began to rain. Still, smoke poured into the sky in the direction of Club Vlad. Dom didn’t wish ill on Merrick and the others, didn’t hope it was them burning. He didn’t care anymore. Not about them, not about anyone. For better or worse (and he would argue it was worse), his life was over. His time came days ago, he just missed the boat.
Picking out an isolated little area, Dom sat against a tree with his legs splayed out in front of him. He titled his head back and closed his eyes. Yes, thinking was hard now. His mind felt sluggish, cold. He was thirsty…so, so thirsty, but he ignored it.
Slowly, the bugs found him. Flies buzzed around him and laid their eggs in his skin. Beetles scuttled over him, followed by worms.
Next, it was the birds. They ate out his eyes and nibbled at his blue, bloated skin.
The animals came last.
Their appetites were bigger.
And they left little remaining of poor, outcast Dominick Mason.
***
That night, Bruce sat alone in his little trailer, a bottle of whiskey wedged between his legs and unshed tears in his eyes. He stared at his reflection in the darkened TV set and took long swallows from the bottle. He planned to drink until he forgot or passed out, whichever came first. He tried to not think about Vanessa, but in his addled state, he couldn’t control himself, and began to cry. When that storm passed, like the others before it, he chugged from the bottle.
As distant church bells clanged the hour - midnight - a feeble knock came at the door. Bruce took another drink and it came again. Getting up, he stumbled, nearly fell, and gripped the bottle tightly. He didn’t want to lose one precious drop.
Again, the knock.
“I’m coming,” Bruce slurred. He staggered to the door and fought with the lock. He was dizzy and seeing double.
When he got it, he opened the door.
The bottle dropped from his hand and clanked onto the floor.
Vanessa, clad in a puke green hospital gown, stood on the step, her hands pressed to her chest and a look of anguish on her milk white face. Her head tilted to one side, the wounds on her neck cleaned but open, gaping. Her dark eyes shone with tears. “I’m dead,” she said.
Breaking down in tears, she collapsed against him and they sank to the floor. She was cold and smelled. Bruce wrapped his arms around her and held her to his chest anyway. “Shhh, it’s alright,” he said drunkenly. “Hey, it’s alright.
“I’m dead,” she repeated, and her voice broke. “I don’t want to die.”
Bruce held her close, trying to warm her icy skin. He didn’t know what to say, so he cried with her.
“You’re safe now,” he said, “it’s going to be okay.”
“I want blood,” she said and sobbed harder, “I want to hurt people.”
“Shhh,” Bruce said again. “It’s okay.”
Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out a utility knife. He flicked the blade across his wrist and searing pain shot up his arm. “Here,” he said and offered her his blood, “drink this.”
He did this without care and without thought. She needed him, and one barnaclehead always backs up another.
Vanessa hesitated, looking from his face to the oozing blood, unsure.
“Go ahead,” he told her.
Vanessa brought his wrist to her mouth.
And began to drink.

1. Fascinating Animal Kingdom Facts:

• Some frogs can freeze solid during winter and thaw out in spring, continuing their lives.
  
• Anteaters have no teeth and consume up to 30,000 insects a day with their long tongues.
  
• Male penguins propose to their lifelong mates by giving them a pebble.
  

1. Unusual Historical Nuggets:

• The oldest known "your mom" joke was discovered on a 3,500-year-old Babylonian tablet.
  
• Ancient Romans used urine as a teeth-whitening agent due to its ammonia content.
  
• The Boston Tea Party, often seen as a rebellion against high taxes, was more a protest against a tax cut.
  

1. Science and Technology Oddities:

• A single strand of human hair can support up to 100 grams in weight.
  
• The world's first computer programmer was Ada Lovelace, who worked on Charles Babbage's Analytical Engine in the mid-1800s.
  
• There are more possible iterations of a game of chess than there are atoms in the known universe.
  

1. Language and Linguistic Quirks:

• The word "set" has the highest number of different meanings in the English language.
  
• The longest word in the English language without a vowel is "rhythms."
  
• The word "facetious" contains all the vowels in alphabetical order.
  

1. Geographical and Cultural Tidbits:

• The country of Monaco is smaller than New York City's Central Park.
  
• There are more public libraries in the U.S. than McDonald's restaurants.
  
• Mount Everest is not the tallest mountain on Earth when measured from base to peak; Mauna Kea in Hawaii holds that record.
  

1. Human Achievements and Records:

• The longest duration spinning a Guinness World Records book on one finger is 4 hours and 25 minutes.
  
• The record for the most push-ups in one hour is 2,806.
  
• The world record for the longest handshake is 42 hours.
  

1. Food and Culinary Marvels:

• The first product to have a barcode scanned for purchase was Wrigley's Juicy Fruit chewing gum.
  
• The world's most expensive burger costs $5,000 and contains gold leaf, caviar, and truffles.
  
  • The world's largest chocolate bar weighed over 12,770 pounds.

1. Entertainment and Pop Culture Trivia:

• The first movie ever made was the 1895 film "Roundhay Garden Scene," lasting about 2.11 seconds.
  
• The world's most-watched television event is the Super Bowl.
  
• The shortest film ever nominated for an Oscar is "Fresh Guacamole," which runs for 1 minute and 40 seconds.
  

1. Legal Quirks and Odd Laws:

• In Switzerland, it's illegal to flush the toilet after 10 PM in an apartment building.
  
• In Canada, it's illegal to use comic sans in official government documents.
  
• In France, it's illegal to name a pig Napoleon.
  

1. Miscellaneous Intriguing Facts:

- Honey never spoils; archaeologists have found edible honey in ancient Egyptian tombs. - Human bones are ounce for ounce four times stronger than concrete. - A small child could swim through the veins of a blue whale. 

I yelled and woke with a start. Sweat dripped down my face. My breathing was hard and desperate. I could have sworn I had just been falling. The stickiness of sleep meddled with the cogs of my mind. Slowly my eyes adjusted to the gloom of my bedroom and I found myself alone, safe and warm. No danger here. My heart rate slowed and I chuckled nervously. Soon all fear had seeped from my mind and all memory of my dream had faded. I rolled out of bed and shivered. Quickly I pulled on a sweater and put on my furry slippers. It was cold in this cabin in the middle of the forest. Although internal plumbing and an electric generator had been added, there was still no central heating. This did not bother me much because I always enjoyed having an excuse to light the fire in the living room. I absolutely loved traditional fireplaces.
​
I was whistling happily in the kitchen, sipping on a glass of cold water as I poured fresh coffee beans into my electric grinder. The sound and smell of coffee being ground always left me feeling content. As my coffee brewed in my French press I cracked two eggs into a bowel and began to whisk. Fifteen minutes later I carried a steaming hot cheese omelet and large mug of coffee out onto my front veranda. I stood in the open doorway, surveying the beauty of the outdoors in the early morning light. The air was cold and fresh; pregnant with complex mixtures of pine and lavender scents. I looked up to see the sky was a deep blue and devoid of all clouds. The thin, dark silhouettes of the trees that surrounded the cabin stood silent and ominous in the soft half-light of the morning. White coats of frost sparkled and melted on the grass as the sun climbed and brightened. I could hear the distant sound of the stream and the call of morning birds.
​
I sighed deeply with satisfaction and sat down on my wooden chair. This is what I loved more than anything. More than the city that bustles and bursts with busy human lives. More than squeezing myself between strangers on the underground train. More than the sickening smell of the streets and the soulless lack of any natural sounds. In the city there were no crickets, no owls, no frogs. Out here there was an abundance of beauty. The trees were so patient and still. So very different from the rushed, ill-mannered commuters I had as my usual morning partners. I definitely preferred the trees. I took another deep breath. I blew on the steam that rose from my coffee mug and sipped cautiously. The coffee was rich and delicious and scalding hot. Perfect. I began to eat my omelet letting the serenity of nature continue to wash over me. My mood had not been so elated for many months and I was seriously thinking that I should move here full-time. Currently I was working as an English teacher and had decided to come out here to work on my novel and take a break from the city. From my life. Once my excellent breakfast was complete I walked back inside and decided to start a fire to warm up the cabin. As I stooped to check the small wicker basket near the fireplace, that should contain the dried firewood, my eyebrow arched when I found the basket empty. Huh? I could have sworn it was half-full yesterday. Puzzled but not at all alarmed I picked up the basket. Soon I put on my large, worn black coat and made my way outside.
​
The frosted ground crunched under my large leather boots as I waded through the woods. Finding dry branches for the fire would be fairly difficult at this time of day as most of the ground was damp by now. However, my plan was just to dry them out in the oven before I used them. After spending a few minutes stooping to inspect sticks of various sizes and dampness I finally filled the basket. “Ok, time to go home.” I muttered eagerly as I rubbed my hands together. The air was still cold enough to make my breath visible and I rubbed my hands together. Suddenly I stopped. My eyebrows furrowed. I did not recognize where I was. But how? I had been exploring the woods for days now and not one time had I gotten lost.
​
My eyes darted back and forth and my head swiveled in confusion. Very soon a creeping panic began to climb from my stomach up into my lungs. My heart began to thump loudly. I looked up at the sun, the voice of my old man ringing in my mind, “Learn to navigate by the stars and sun and you’ll never lose your way”. I smiled, remembering his warm eyes and loud laughter. I missed him. I closed my eyes, concentrating. “Ok, that must be East, so that means I should walk…” I stretched out my arm and hand, index finger pointed. I turned on my heel. “North. That way.”
​
After a few moments I found my path blocked by a sudden sheer drop. I was facing an enormous quarry. My face blanched. “What… where the hell did this come from?” Again, panic seeped into my blood. “There aren’t any bloody quarries around here!” I moved forward to peek over the edge and peered down. The drop must be at least fifteen meters! I looked from left to right and saw no stairs or bridges. How the hell was I supposed to get across? My confusion grew and grew. Suddenly I froze. There, lying at the very bottom of the quarry, just near the cliff’s bottom, was a mangled body. The light in the sky was still too young to properly illuminate the quarry’s depths, but I could tell it was a body! My eyes bulged and my mouth opened wide with astonishment. “Jesus! Hello? Are you okay down there?” I yelled. Nothing but cold silence pressed against my ears. Suddenly I noticed a path that I had not seen before. It started to my right and wound down the slope before me. Quickly I started hurrying down towards the person; maybe I could still help? Soon I was at the bottom and I ran up to the body that lay still on the ground. As I got closer and the sun grew brighter I stopped dead. The body that lay crumpled at my feet was – me. “No way. There is just absolutely no way!” I shouted. I trembled as I took a step backward. My foot slipped on a large stone and I felt myself begin to fall to the ground.
​
Suddenly I yelped and my legs kicked out. I blinked in the sudden darkness and found myself on my sofa in the cabin’s living room. “What the hell? It was just a dream?” I said out loud as I sat up. I felt the softness of the couch cushions beneath me, I could smell the citrus scents leftover from the wash I’d given them recently. I stood up, my breathing still fast. The large windows showed a stormy afternoon. Rain pelted the glass heavily and the wind howled loudly. “What the hell? It was just a dream?” I repeated. I checked my watch. It was nearly two o’clock in the afternoon. I raked my brain, trying to figure out what was happening. But the details of my dream were fading. “I was in the forest looking for firewood. Then I found that body in that quarry.” It had been so real. I felt quite disoriented. Was I truly awake now? Or still asleep? And that body? What had been so terrible about it? The dream had already seeped away. I couldn’t remember.
​
Still confused I made my way quickly towards the front door. Just as I opened it there was a deafening peal of thunder and a bright fork of lightning lit up the darkling sky. My mouth dropped open. There, just beyond the veranda, as if it had always been there, was the quarry. That cliff! I closed my mouth. “But… how…” Ignoring the icy rain, I walked towards the edge and once again peeked over. In the cold light of another flash of lightening and rumble of thunder, I saw my own body twisted and broken on the ground below. I gasped. My mind reeled. My heart fluttered. “What is going on?” I yelled looking around for some sort of explanation. When I looked back down again my face turned white. The body, my body, was gone. Suddenly I felt the eyes of a stranger on my back. A feeling of dread crept up my spine. A twig snapped. I spun around.
​
I stood face to face with my shadow. But he did not look like me. Not exactly. Darkness coated his body like a skintight suit and I could not tell what he was wearing. He may have even been naked for all I know. I could see most of his face and hair, but his eyes were cloaked entirely in semi-circles of shadow which fell below each of his brows. He seemed utterly unconcerned about the storm. “You poor thing. You poor, wretched thing.” When he spoke, his voice was not mine. It was deep and commanding, yet gentle. His words came out slow and calm, almost lulling, “I caught you as you fell. You have made a half-choice. You can be at peace forever. But you must choose now.” He stretched out a tenebrous hand and pointed toward the edge of the cliff. Suddenly I noticed something new appear in his hands. It was a book. It was my book. The one I had been writing. Had I already finished it? Or had I just started?
​
He turned to one of the middle pages and read, “‘Life is the antithesis of peace. Death is the antithesis of suffering.’” He snapped the book closed and turned again to face me, “How trite. Yet, so often the plainest truths are. All you want is peace, is it not? You are right in thinking that life can never provide this.” A cold smile curled his lips. “Even the living forests you so admire are crawling with suffering and conflict. Even the trees that appear so peaceful, so still, are wordlessly fighting each other for light. Racing against each other to claim their own space. It is the nature of the living to struggle.” Confusion fought with terror in my mind. I stammered. “I…I don’t understand. What is this place? Who are you?” Suddenly the man robed in darkness leapt at me and clasped my wrist, “You know who I am”. Small crimson lights flared to life like ignes fatui in the depths of his sockets. He began to pull me towards the edge. “No! Wait!” I shouted, digging my heels into the wet grass. But he was too strong. He snarled, “Isn’t this what you wanted?” and before I could stop myself I was crying from desperation. Then with a strength that could not be human he lifted me above his head, and threw me over the side of the quarry. Lightning flashed as the air rushed through my hair. I screamed as I plummeted to my death.
​
I yelled and woke with a start. I heard the soft beeping of monitors. I felt the scratchy linens of a hospital bed beneath me. Pain followed swiftly and exploded through my limbs. My voice was croaky and dry as I spoke, “Where…what the hell…what happened?” A nurse rushed to my side. “It’s alright love, you’ve ‘ad a bit of a tumble. Doctor’s got you all sorted. Just rest now”. Her voice was warm and comforting, like a cup of tea.
​
My memory returned to me slowly. My family did not own any cabin in the forest. The day of the accident I had been jogging in the woods and took my usual route near the abandoned quarry. I remember exactly what had happened. For a long time, I have been overwhelmed with my work and underwhelmed with my life. I wanted nothing more than to finish my novel and bail on all my teaching responsibilities. My father had also recently died after a long and horrible fight with cancer and it was the first time I realized that at my age life stops providing and starts taking. I realized that soon all those things, all those people, I could once rely on were not going to last forever. An invisible fire was lit in my flesh and I felt my time was rapidly running out.
​
I jogged far, leaving the city limits. As I stood at the edge of that quarry, panting, my sadness hanging on me heavily, I had, for a moment, contemplated jumping. I had thought about it often before. As I stared down, I imagined my broken body at the bottom of the cliff. Then, like in all my low moments, I let the cold inhumanness of the universe fill me up.
​
With my eyes closed all I could hear was my mother crying over my father’s corpse. All I could hear were the endless calls from the funeral home asking for their money. All the constant knocking of debt collectors on our door. All I could see were the endless medical bills flooding the postbox. All I felt was loneliness. A horrible, unrelenting, unsolvable loneliness. I had no great love, no amazing career, and my writing would never be good enough to publish. All I could feel was the gaping hole my father had left behind. It hurt. For just a moment I convinced myself I did not belong here anymore. My lips trembled. I walked right up to the edge. I felt my sadness swell in my chest. I clenched my fists tightly. I imagined taking a single step forward. It would be so easy. I imagined the air rushing past me. Falling to my doom. I imagined the horrible pain of the impact. But I also imagined the peace that would come after. A peace I craved. I imagined a picturesque cabin in the woods. A beautiful fireplace. A shelter from the city. A place where I could rest. It was in that moment of contemplative despair, before I could fully commit to the act, that the old unstable ground of the quarry crumbled beneath my feet and I had slipped from the edge and fell. Only the shadows were there to catch me.
​
Recovery was slow. My mother and sister came to visit me multiple times and made the stay at the hospital bearable. How many dreams had I had? How much had I awoken and then re-awoken? Could I be sure I was truly awake now? As I pondered this I tried to remember. But all I could recall was that very last dream. Those dark horrible eyes. The terror of that very last fall. In that moment, I had realized what I wanted. Now I felt rejuvenated in a way I had not felt for many years. The exhaustion of my spirit had finally been ameliorated. I actually looked forward to getting out of bed. I actually wanted to go to school again. My passion for teaching was reignited. Soon after my recovery I even managed to get my novel published but did not make much money.
​
Many years have passed since my fall and I’m in my 60s now and retired and have never married. I now know that those dreams were not just dreams. That phantom I confronted has remained with me. Whenever the stresses of life pile up and I become fatigued, he comes to me. He still waits for me. He is real. I see his eyes covered in shadow. Tiny pinpricks of red-light flicker therein. At first, I only saw him rarely; glimpses in dreams. As time went on and I grew older and weary of the world once more I began to see him in the corner of my room every night. What’s worse was that in those moments when I feel the lowest I find myself craving the solitude of that cabin. The peace it brought with it. All this I craved despite the price.
​
Last week I attended my mother’s funeral. It was a small affair, most of her friends having died many years before. I saw my sister there with her husband and children. They are so happy and full of life. I feel a pang of jealousy but also relief. My life was always to be a solitary one. My sister and I cried during the service. When we chatted later we tried in vain to comfort each other. It was then I began to mention the strange man I’d been seeing. But my voice died in my throat as I looked up.
He was there with us at lunch, standing behind me. I saw him in the mirror. My sister saw him too. She yelled, leapt out of her seat and fell to the ground when she saw him. “Oh my God, what the hell is that?” she screamed. Then, just as swiftly as shadows retreat from light, he was gone. “But how? What was? Who was that?” she asked loudly, eyes wide, the other people attending the restaurant had stopped eating to watch us, obviously confused. My sister was pale and I stood to help her to her feet, “Now do you believe me?” Lunch ended there.
​
Flustered and disturbed we returned home. I returned alone to my home in London while my sister returned home with her husband and children to Edinburgh. She seemed a lot less shaken up once she’d met with them at the station. I wonder if she’ll tell them what she saw?
​
Since the funeral I see him constantly now. Often his shadow-hidden hand stretches out and he holds a revolver. But he does not mean to shoot me. No. He holds the revolver’s ivory handle toward me. Sometimes he holds out a hangman’s noose. Sometimes it’s a long, ornate dagger. Most recently he holds out a canister of helium gas. And a plastic bag for my head. Each time he does this I resist him. Sometimes, when I’m alone, I even yell at him to leave. His face remains dark, stony and enigmatic.
​
None of this would scare me quite so much if I had not just realized one terrible detail. What turns my blood to ice from fear is that every time I see him he is infinitesimally closer. How had I not noticed before? Perhaps it was a kindness. Gooseflesh runs down my neck as I see him standing insidiously in my cold bedroom. He is near the edge of my bed now. He is patient and has respected my choice so far. Nevertheless, he holds out that same revolver. That same noose. That same dagger. I tremble with fright because I know I will not be able to resist him much longer. Perhaps soon I’ll know if this was all a dream too.

Chapter 1: Foundations of Freddy's:
During the 1930's, people were suffering from an economic crisis during the 1929 crisis. So, to entertain people, an attraction of a dancing bear was created: Fredbear's Singin’ Show. For many years, that dancing bear had delighted so many people, including a little boy named William Afton. Someday, William wanted to create a circus just like Fredbear's Singin’ Show but instead of a dancing bear, he wanted to create rudimentary costumes.
1970: On October 31st, William Afton founds Fall Fest, with the characters being a mascot version of Fredbear, and new characters created by William: Bonnie and Foxy. The circus made a huge success, however, there were people who wanted to copy it. A robotic engineer named Henry Emily founds a diner named Chica’s Party World, copying the furry mascots idea but instead of being costumes, Henry’s characters were animatronics powered by battery packs. The characters of this diner were Chica, Happy Frog, Pig Patch, Orville Elephant, Mr. Hippo and Neddbear, an obvious copy of Fredbear. Even though Henry’s idea was better, Chica’s Party World was unsuccessful, so he had to sell his restaurant to William, and both would start working together.
1979: Henry Emily and William Afton founded Fredbear’s Family Diner, with Fredbear and Spring Bonnie, the yellow characters from Fall Fest. Spring Bonnie had that name because of the springlock suits, that fused William’s costume idea and Henry’s animatronic idea. Henry also made characters for Fall Fest, like his version of William’s characters: Freddy Fazbear, Blue Bonnie and Orange Foxy, a costume version of Chica (since Henry still wanted to use Chica but he discarded the other Mediocre Melodies), as well as new characters: Balloon Boy, elephant, crow, lion, the Mimic, Sun and Moon and Circus Baby. The Mimic endoskeleton worked under the Mimic1 AI program, responsible for copying voices and movements, and it used to copy William’s movements in the yellow Bonnie costume. It was also used to wear the elephant, lion and crow costumes.
1983: Because of the diner’s success, Henry and William founded Fazbear Entertainment, Inc and created Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza, with the animatronics being the barnyard animals from Fall Fest, such as Freddy Fazbear, Blue Bonnie, Chica and Orange Foxy. The company was so successful that they made toys, plushies, masks and a cartoon show named Fredbear and Friends, that included Fredbear, Freddy Fazbear, Blue Bonnie, Chica and Orange Foxy.
Chapter 2: The Afton era: William was a very busy man, so he ordered his oldest child Michael Afton to take care of his brother. However, his brother was a shame for Michael because he was his father’s favourite, so he bullied him. Because of that, William made nanny cams in the forms of Fredbear plush to watch his son though the security cameras in his bunker (that had both entrances in William’s home office and Fredbear’s Family Diner), while he could talk to him by his walkie-talkie. When the Crying Child’s birthday came in, it was going to be celebrated at Fredbear’s Family Diner on October 31st. Michael wanted to pull the ultimate prank: He and his friends were going to put the Crying Child in Fredbear’s mouth, since he was afraid of the springlocks because he thought he saw his father killing people in those suits. The boy was so scared that his movements made the springlocks activate, thus, smashing his head. The boy was taken to a hospital. On thr same day, Fall Fest caught fire, which was also something that devastated William. On November 1st, the Crying Child died. William promised his son that he was going to put him back together. How he didn’t have the time right now, William buried his son’s body in a remote location in the woods near his house. Because of this incident, the springlock suits were retired at the safe room of Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza and Henry creates the Security Puppet at Fredbear’s Family Diner to prevent another tragedy. The suits at Fredbear’s Family Diner were replaced by the costumes from Fall Fest until the real replacements arrived. How William lost his Fall Fest and his son on the same day, he started to drink at the Jr’s bar. While he was drunk, he thought on how Henry had stolen his ideas, his Fall Fest and now he had stolen his son. After being kicked out of the bar, William goes to Fredbear’s Family Diner to ruin Henry’s reputation, but instead he finds Henry’s daughter Charlie locked outside of the building. So, using his bare hands, he murders Charlie and hides her body in the back alley. The Security Puppet saw that though the window, so it goes to the back alley to protect her body. When William comes back home, he found out that Michael once again had escaped the house though the window to go to the Crying Child’s body. After the Crying Child's death, Michael used to say that he saw his brother in the form of Fredbear haunting him. So, to keep him in the house, William created the Sound Illusion Disc, a device that could create nightmarish versions of the animatronics: Nightmare Freddy, Nightmare Bonnie, Nightmare Chica, Nightmare Balloon Boy, Nightmarionne and Nightmare FredbeaNightmare, based on the Crying Child. Allusions to his brother would be given to him so he could suffer from memories the past. Because of the deaths of the children, Fredbear’s Family Diner shuts down and the Security Puppet is retired in the safe room of Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza. Now, what William wanted to do was to start his own robotic company and surpass Henry from robotics. So, William founds Afton Robotics LLC. How he was spending more time on his bunker trying to find a way to revive his son, his wife Clara divorces him. In the custody battle, William made Michael and Elizabeth Afton to be against their mother, which made her sad and then committed suicide. William’s solution was to build human animatronics so he could rebuild the Crying Child’s head.
1985: When he killed Charlie, something got out of him that he wanted more. On June 26th, he sneaks in Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza and using the old Spring Bonnie suit, he lured five children to the safe room and killed them. He hides their bodies in the animatronics, four of them being the main cast and one of them being the old Fredbear suit. Because of this incident, Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza shuts down. Henry knew that William was responsible for these murders, but there was no way to arrest him. So, he needed to be sure this never happened again. He had the idea to create the new and improved Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza with the animatronics being based on his Fall Fest characters. These new animatronics were going to contain free roaming mode during the day and facial recognition systems with criminal database so they could detect a criminal and alert the police.
1987: On October 31st, the new and improved Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza was finally opened, and instead of being made of wood, the Toy animatronics were made of plastic. The animatronics were Toy Freddy, Toy Bonnie, Toy Chica, Toy Foxy (being pink instead of orange because the original Foxy was scary for children), Balloon Boy and the reuse of the Security Puppet, to insure that this place was going to be safe. The animatronics from the original Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza and Fredbear’s Family Diner were put in the Parts and Service room. When William heard about this new location, he is hired as the day shift security guard in the fake name Dave Miller and killed five more children and how there was no way he could hide the bodies in the Toy animatronics, he let the bodies scattered around the pizzeria. When he was about to leave the location, he saw something weird. The Puppet and the Withered animatronics were trying to save the children. Did thay mean that the Puppet was being possessed by Charlie and the Withered animatronics were being possessed by the five children? He needed to learn more. On November 13th, the pizzeria was closed because of the Bite of 87 and the missing children incident. There was no way a new Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza was ever going to open again, so William needed to create his own pizzeria. Taking back the idea of Circus Baby and the Mimic1 program from Henry, William founds Circus Baby’s Pizza World. His plan was to use the animatronics to lure the children to their stomach hatches, thus, killing them. He would then close the location under the cover up of gas leak and transfer the animatronics to his bunker that was going to be called: Circus Baby’s Entertainment and Rentals, so he could make experiments with them. The animatronics were going to be Funtime Freddy with Bon Bon, Funtime Foxy (based on pink Foxy from Fall Fest) Ballora (based on his wife Clara) and a new version of Circus Baby. There was no Funtime Chica because it was only going to include William’s creations. William brought his daughter Elizabeth Afton to the pizzeria, but she wanted to meet Circus Baby. Of course, he didn’t let her because he didn’t want to lose another child from his creations. However, she didn’t hear her father, so she went close to Circus Baby and she was swallowed by her. When William found this out, it was too late. He had noticed that Circus Baby’s eyes changed from blue to emerald green, and green was the colour of Elizabeth’s eyes. So, William’s theory was correct, his victims were possessing the animatronics, but now, he needed to know how.
1993: Henry reopened the original Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza with the original animatronics, however, because of the franchise’s past, it was unsuccessful, so the location shutted down. William broke in the abandoned building to break apart the five animatronics he had stuffed the children in. He was suspecting that the endoskeletons were the secret to the possessions, so he brought them to his bunker, fused them with the Scooper until they became one, extracted a white goo he called remnant and injected it in the Funtime animatronics’ endoskeletons, and they were alive. However, they were hostile and agressive. Baby wasn’t like that, so he needed to know what made them to be like that. William also discovered that remnant was destroyed by fire. So, he enters the abandoned pizzeria one final time, but this time, the spirits of the children he had killed were chasing him. William goes to the safe room, hides in the old Spring Bonnie suit because that was what caused their deaths. When he thought that he was invincible, the springlocks activated. He could survive, however, he had collapsed on the ground, unable to stand up. He was sitted on the ground for days until a security guard found him and reported a break in. Henry saw William there and instead of helping him, he orders a few constructors to seal the safe room with a wall, so William would never cause trouble again and no one would see him lying on the ground. However, that didn’t prevent him from living. His hate and anger made him survive. Meanwhile in the Afton house, Michael has been waiting for his father for days, and his father wasn’t giving any contact to him like post it letters or phone calls. In case of long absence, Michael has been instructed by his father to go to his home office with a key and check the bookshelf. In it, Michael discovered his father’s secret underground bunker and within it, the experiments he has been doing, and how he was the cause William went insane. That was when he had found out the truth about him. He also found his sister as Circus Baby, and she guided him to the Scooping Room. Michael thought that he was going to save the children, but he was tricked. The animatronics had fused themselves into one endoskeleton named Ennard and it entered Michadl’s body though the Scooper, so they could use it to escape Circus Baby’s Entertainment and Rentals. For months, Michael's body was decomposing until he puked Ennard out of his body. The remnants inside him allowed him to survive, and now he was a living corpse. Now, what Michael needed to do was to find his father. On November, with fake IDs (Mike Schmidt and Fritz Smith), he worked at the abandoned Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza locations as a night shift security guard. He could feel his brother’s spirit haunting him with the illusions of the animatronics. The Crying Child’s spirit was fused with Cassidy’s, one of William’s victims, thus, creating Golden Freddy. During the day, the Crying Child invaded Michael’s dreams, giving him the same torment his father gave him. So, because of this, he sets both locations on fire to set the spirits free, even though the fire didn’t destroy too much.
2023: 30 years after the shut down of Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza, a team made a partnership with Fazbear Entertainment to create Fazbear’s Fright, a horror attraction based on the past of Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza, so they could make light of it and then Freddy Fazbear would come back. When Michael heard about that location, he is hired as a night shift security guard of Fazbear’s Fright to look for any trail of his father. For weeks, he didn’t find anything interesting, until the Fazbear’s Fright team broke the wall blocking the safe room and found the old Spring Bonnie suit. So, the team brought it to the attraction, and that was when Michael reencountered his father with illusions and Phantoms of his past. So, he sets the location on fire, thus, freeing the spirits of five children, including his brother. William, however, was still alive. Fortunately, the solution for that came later that year. Henry came back as the CEO of Fazbear Entertainment and had the following plan: He wanted to hire a franchisee to create a pizzeria in the same location of Fredbear’s Family Diner, the place where it all started. Below the pizzeria, there was going to be a labyrinth to trap the remaining animatronics in, luring them with the RASC. Then, the franchisee would set the place on fire with Henry inside (since he blamed himself for his daughter’s death) and an exit for the franchisee. While he was going to die, Fazbear would die with him. Michael is hired as a franchisee of Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza Place and after luring his father, his sister, Charlie in Lefty (to prevent her from escaping) and Molten Freddy (the remaining endoskeleton from Ennard), he sets the pizzeria on fire. Instead of leaving, Michael remained there. How he couldn’t die because of the remnants in his body, he had to stay there and die in the fire. All the spirits were free, except one: William Afton. Cassidy’s spirit was still out there, and now, she was tormenting William because she was the one he shouldn’t have killed. Eventually, Cassidy rested her soul, leaving William to be tormented by his creations.
Chapter 3: Post-Purple Guy: The Fazbear’s Fright team wanted to continue trying to bring back Freddy Fazbear. So, they restart Fazbear Entertainment as being a Limited Liability Company (Fazbear Entertainment LLC). However, no one trusted the Fazbear name, so before opening their first establishment, Fazbear hired an unsuccessful indie game developer named Steve to make games about Fazbear’s history to make light of them. The games became a huge success, however, since they contained things like Afton being a killer and the animatronics being possessed, the games were cancelled and Steve was accused of being a crazy man. So, Fazbear took another direction: They hired a VR game studio named Silver Parasol Games to make Freddy Fazbear’s Virtual Experience. However, to speed up the process in game development, Fazbear brought some shipments from the old company, and one of them was the old Mimic endoskeleton that was found in Henry’s old house. Then, the developers scanned it’s circuit boards to transfer them in the game. This programming from the Mimic’s circuit boards created Glitchtrap, a digital manifestation of the Mimic. How the Mimic used to copy William’s movements in the yellow Bonnie costume from Fall Fest, it’s digital form was the yellow Bonnie costume. So, it could only receive information about William Afton, and when the data of William’s life was received to it, it became hostile because of his crimes, thus, mimicking William’s criminal history. So, Glitchtrap starts to manipulate the beta tester Jeremy, to the point that he had sliced his own face. The second one was Tape Girl and before she died, she could split Glitchtrap into 16 cassette tapes to trick the next beta tester into thinking that they were going to kill Glitchtrap. The third beta tester, Vanessa, had a sad backstory, so she could be manipulated without commiting suicide. So, after following Tape Girl’s commands, she became influenced by Glitchtrap. In Glitchtrap’s mind, Vanessa was Elizabeth because of their similar appearances. Even if Glitchtrap was still alive, Fazbear published Freddy Fazbear’s Virtual Experience, and it became a huge success.
2030: On March, all the money they had earned, Fazbear creates the Fazbear Funtime Service delivery app and their first establishment: Freddy Fazbear’s Mega Pizzaplex, with the animatronics being Glamrock Freddy, Glamrock Bonnie, Glamrock Chica and Roxanne Wolf (still not using Foxy because of how scary he was, even though Fazbear made attractions for him). There was also a few of extra animatronics, like Montgomery Gator in Monty’s Gator Golf, the old Sun and Moon animatronic from Fall Fest in Superstar Daycare and DJ Music Man in the west arcade. The Pizzaplex was built on top of Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza Place so it could be a museum of the first establishment from Fazbear’s history. The old endoskeletons from the old animatronics were going to be brought to the underground section of the Pizza Place, including the Mimic. However, the constructors realized how violent the Mimic was because of William’s information on his programming, so the constructors sealed him in Circus Baby’s Entertainment and Rentals with a concrete wall. Glitchtrap’s plan was to escape the digital world and live in the real world. So, how the Mimic was sealed, Vanessa had to become the Chief Security Officer of the Pizzaplex to install the Glitchtrap virus at the old Spring Bonnie suit. How Vanessa didn’t have qualifications to become the Chief Security Officer, there was going to be a STAFF meeting. However, she had installed Glitchtrap in the unused Glamrock endoskeletons, and they killed the STAFF. So, Vanessa becomes the Head of Security at the Pizzaplex and installs the Glitchtrap virus in the Fazbear network, with it’s source being in Burntrap after she used Glamrock Freddy to clear the path to William. Vanessa made a furry costume and using the VANNI mask used by technicians, she named it Vanny. The animatronics at the Pizzaplex became hostile under the influence of the Glitchtrap virus controlling the Pizzaplex. Even so that Montgomery Gator destroyed Glamrock Bonnie to become one of the Pizzaplex’s main stars. Fazbear then made a cover up story of why Bonnie went missing. Even though Vanny was following Glitchtrap’s orders, she wanted to be free from the influence. Then, she remembered that the thing that weakened William’s most was his youngest son’s death, so how he made human robots, Vanessa wanted to create a robot version of the Crying Child with the memories of him. How Glitchtrap had the information of William’s past, maybe seeing his son would weaken Glitchtrap. How the Crying Child’s name had no record, Vanny names him Gregory. However, Gregory also ends up in the influence of Glitchtrap and he made Vanny more influenced. Both Gregory and Vanessa didn’t have memories of when they become influenced by Glitchtrap. How people noticed that these two were crazy, Vanessa (as patient 71) and Gregory (as patient 46) started doing therapy, and when the therapists asked too much, Gregory was going to send a Fazbear Funtime Service animatronics to kill them. Vanny built the MXES system and the Security Nodes thoughout the Pizzaplex to prevent any technician from freeing the Mimic and breaking the concrete wall. How the Funtime animatronics contained the Mimic1 program, they were mixed with it’s bad data, resulting in the creation of the Blob, which was fighting against Glitchtrap.
2034: A girl named Cassie makes a birthday party with Roxanne Wolf at the Pizzaplex, however, no one showed up. Gregory, in an act of kindness, shows up on it, and they became friends. Cassie’s father was a technician at the Pizzaplex (formerly being a techniccian at Circus Baby’s Entertainment and Rentals) and he was one of Michael’s friends who helped him to kill the Crying Child, however, Cassie didn’t know about that. Eventually, he was fired because he had discovered the Glitchtrap virus and tried to kill it by playing the Princess Quest arcade games.
2035: On March, Vanessa without being on Glitchtrap’s influence meets Gregory, and she thinks that he is an intruder, so she goes after him. Gregory hacks his favourite animatronic Glamrock Freddy to hide on his stomach hatch, in which he used to make birthday cakes na piñatas, and he is disabled while he was on a live show. When he wakes up on his room in safe mode at 11:30 PM, he finds Gregory, and promises him that he was going to help him escape the Pizzaplex and Vanessa. She had alerted the other animatronics about Gregory. When Gregory was about to escape at 12:00 AM, the doors shutted down, now all he had to do was to survive the Pizzaplex until 6:00 AM. He upgraded Freddy by destroying the other animatronics and he freed Vanessa from Glitchtrap’s influence and the virus was removed from Fazbear’s network. Because of the STAFF bots’ malfunctions after Glitchtrap was removed from the Pizzaplex network, Fazbear shuts the establishment down. Soon after that, an earthquake made the Pizzaplex collapsed. Glitchtrap was still alive, and how Vanessa didn’t listen to his commands anymore, he had to lure another victim. How Cassie’s father tried to kill him, Glitchtrap thought that he was the right candidate to make him stronger again. So, Cassie’s father goes to the ruined Pizzaplex and he goes to Burntrap’s location at the Pizza Place. He could completely free Vanny from Glitchtrap’s influence, but by ignoring his past from 1983, Cassie’s father became influenced by him. So, Glitchtrap comes back to control the Pizzaplex and he commands the Nightmare STAFF bots to kill Cassie’s father and out his organs in Map Bot, just like William used to stuff his victims inside animatronics. But why Map Bot? Glitchtrap’s plan was to come back to control the Pizzaplex and free the Mimic. So, Glitchtrap, pretending that Gregory was trapped in the sinkhole under Roxy’s Raceway, contacts with Cassie for her to free the Mimic. In order to free him, Cassie would need a VANNI mask to break all Security Nodes, so the MXES system could be destroyed and then Cassie could break the concrete wall. So, Glitchtrap uses Map Bot to deliver Cassie her father’s old VANNI mask. She would do anything to save Gregory, since he saved her in her birthday party. When Cassie freed the Mimic, the real Gregory talked to her in her Roxy walkie-talkie and guided her to the elevator that took to William’s home office. However, when she reached there, Gregory said that he couldn’t risk being followed by the Mimic, so after a static error, Gregory (at least what’s supposed to be him) cuts the elevator’s power and it crashes with Cassie inside.

I know I've taken a different route to learning Spanish than staying 100% with DS and wanted to share how things have gone for me. While I've commented on a bunch of posts here about my own experiences, this will be my first proper write-up. I'm actually currently at 186 hours, so this post is a bit overdue, but I was inspired by a YouTube video today by Greg and Lisa Lewis to contribute my own experiences to hopefully help others.
(You can jump down to my Methods section and my General Tips and Experience if my Spanish learning background isn't of interest to you. Also, I'm a technical writer by trade, so I had to do the whole formatting thing to help communicate what I wanted to get across.)

How I Got Started

I originally studied 4 years of French in high school, went to an intensive month-long class in France, and then when I got to college, I was lazy enough to study it again for three quarters. After graduating with a degree, I went back for another undergraduate degree and took two or three quarters of Russian, just because. After graduating with my second undergrad degree, I went into the working world and eventually worked for a company that said they would pay for half of an employee's tuition for whatever they were going to college for. So...I went back to the city college near me (in Atlanta so it was Georgia State University) and took undergrad classes. There I studied Japanese for three or four quarters.
All of that was to give context to my studying of languages.

Motivation

Spanish was never on my original radar and last year, I got into studying Irish on Duolingo (which was not in the slightest helpful with learning Irish. I decided to shift over to refreshing my French language studies via Duolingo and ended slowly becoming reacquainted with the language. Because I have a penchant for this one local killer Mexican restaurant near me, I decided to include Spanish with my French Duolingo studies since Spanish is all over the place and my studies could actually be potentially helpful in daily life.
I also have started going to the local Hispanic grocery chain (Talpa) and just started buying random things that piqued my interest which also in small ways expanded my vocabulary.
Even before I started studying Spanish, I enjoyed Ricky Martin and Enrique Iglesias. Since studying Spanish, I started expanding my Spanish music selection to include Sebastián Yatra, Maria Becerra, Pablo Alborán, and just random music via Apple Music or Amazon Music.
What's also driving me forward is wanting to not just be able to watch or listen to Spanish videos and music as well as converse with Spanish speakers and be able to read, my "eyes on the prize" goal is to be able to watch Siempre Bruja totally in Spanish with no subtitles.
I've also found watching videos on YouTube or reading everyone's successes in this subreddit, I've found the personal stories of YouTube such as Greg and Lisa Lewis and the new channels they recommended of Rue Avenue, Spanish Journey with Mike Lee (Atlanta represent!), bryhn learning spanish, and AJLearnsSpanish (which Greg and Lisa Lewis recommended in their most recent update for hitting 600 hours). Hearing all these success stories helps motivate me when I'm feeling a bit stuck on not understanding as much as I think I should be understanding what I'm watching or listening to.

Methods

While DS is my primary learning tool by far (and so glad I found it thanks to the Reddit languagelearning community), there are some others tools that got me started or impacted me that I am using, did use, or will use in the future. I'll list what I used to get into my Spanish studies in the order that I started using them. I got into DS after about two days after I started using Duolingo, Babbel, and Language Transfer
Duolingo (I don't really recommend)
Duolingo is something I'm primarily sticking with to keep up with my friends. I have found it slightly helpful with reinforcing vocabulary and a bit of structure.
Babbel (Decently helpful)
Before I found DS, I went and took the plunge and bought the lifetime subscription to Babbel last year during Black Friday's sales week last year.
I'm only doing one session a day as well as the review (doing the listening review which helps reinforce the understanding part like I get out of DS). While some of the lessons in past tense or future tense have been a bit helpful when listening to podcasts or a bit of DS, I've really found it is helping me conceptually in understanding Spanish and how it works grammatically which has actually been somewhat helpful with DS and podcasts.
Language Transfer (Recommend it when you have more DS under your belt—maybe 300-600 hours?)
Language Transfer was something I had when I started studying French and it occurred to me to use it for Spanish. Looking back at the 23 lessons I listened to, the first number of episodes helped me in subtle but also tremendous ways (primarily cognates and some other tips).
I'll return to it when I hit somewhere in the 300 to 600 hour range and start from scratch.
Drops (Really appreciate and recommend this app)
Drops is a vocabulary app that has actually been really helpful to me with my comprehending Spanish when listening, watching, or even the little bit of reading I'm doing. I use the free version (5 minute chunks a day) that I use with my daily routine of other forms of learning Spanish other than DS.
Why I recommend Drops is that it teaches vocabulary using illustrations as well as constantly saying the word each time you select it. It's been very helpful in picking up things that I hear or see elsewhere (like in a Hispanic grocery store or hear on a podcast or hear someone say it in DS). The reinforcement of the vocabulary you have learned is also a big help.
The very minor downside is that somehow I went from beginner Spanish to advanced vocabulary (maybe trying one of the short term achievements for a special occasion, holiday, or event?) and realized only recently that there is a ton more beginner friendly (as in the words that are mainly used in Spanish) material, so I moved back to beginner lessons.
Beelinguapp (Haven't used it beyond a few uses, but definitely recommend it when reading comes into the picture for you)
Another thing I bought a lifetime subscription to on sale thanks to Woot! having it on sale.
I tinkered around with a bit and found the combination of native speakers reading text to you (you can have it fully in Spanish or Spanish at the top and English at the bottom of your phone's screen) helps with pronounciation and reading comprehension. There is the standard levels of difficulty from beginner to intermediate to advanced, plus it keeps track of how many words you've read for those people who are also tracking the amount of words you read for comprehensible input.
Spanish Dictionary (¡!) (When I cheat and look up words, it's been amazingly helpful with pronunciation as well as definitions)
Spanish Dictionary has been helpful (I got a subscription to it) when someone says a word
Podcasts and Shows/Videos
Thanks to you all in this subreddit and the wonderful spreadsheet of what people are using for CI, I found some great podcasts that have helped me get more CI into my daily life (like when driving). I will eventually probably listen to podcasts when doing more than just driving some day.
I highly recommend YouTube videos on pronouncing Spanish letters. Seriously, I highly recommend starting with such videos (I've watched a bunch of them). it has really helped me with visualizing what is being said phonetically as well as helped understand what is being said in DS videos, podcasts, and when I've done my bits of reading and trying to say words outloud for my apps.
Cuéntame (Super Beginner) is an amazing first podcast to learn from as a super beginner or beginner if you understand cognates which I'll go into more down below in my Tips section if you aren't familiar with them. This is where the little bit of Duolingo I had done helped get me get the basics when listening to her speak. The cognates helped me put together what she was saying which provided me an incredibly exciting upward spiral in my Spanish studies which helped me some with my comprehension of DS videos which helped me better understand Cuéntame.
Chill Spanish (Beginner) is what I moved over to after finishing Cuéntame. Chill Spanish was a mixed bag for me as a super beginner but was a bit easier the more learning I had once I had moved past 50 hours with DS and CI. Sometimes his podcast was pretty advanced for me and other times I got most of what was being said.
Help Me Learn Spanish Joel (Beginner to Intermediate) is one I have to jump between listening to the podcast at 1x (for the beginner leveled podcasts) and .75x (intermediate leveled podcasts). When he's doing a beginner level podcast, I have been able to understand most of it. When he's doing an intermediate level podcast, slowing it down to .75x speed helped me somewhat continue understanding what's being said, but a bunch of the vocabulary (like what people eat for breakfast (desayuno), lunch (almuerzo), and dinner (cena)) and their customs (costumbre) were things I needed to look up to grasp which is not what Pablo recommends but has helped me understand more vocabulary that I didn't originally get from DS or one of the apps I use.

General Tips and Experiences

Cognates

• Look for the cognates — if you are an English speaker or know one of the Romance languages, cognates are so helpful in jumping ahead in comprehension. Cognates are common words in Romance languages that are similar to each other. Language Transfer's early lessons helped me grasp the concept which made DS and podcasts a lot easier in the beginning.
• I used my own understanding plus TakeLessons.com's breakdown of common cognates to create the below bullet points (giving credit where credit is due and to possibly help others).
  • There is a good sized overlap between English and Spanish (as well as French and Italian) words, so if you listen for words that are like what you know in English (sostenibilidad/sustenibilidad does sound like sustainability for example or arból is connected to something like Arbor Day which is celebrating the planting of trees). There are ton of more direct connections like hospital, metro, cereal, horrible, escape, etc...
  • Mind you, not all Spanish words will be matches for the English words I use as examples below, but knowing cognates definitely help me leap frog forward in my comprehension.
  • Verbs like adopt -> adoptar or limit -> limitar or control -> controlar for example are ones that when I realized "wait, that sounds like a word I know in English..." and might have looked it up for confirmation, it helped me relax more in what I was listening to or watching and trust myself to understand more.
  • -mente: When I found out that's putting a word I knew in English into the adverb form (-ly), I realized how much that was being used in podcasts and videos I was taking in.
  • -ción: When I realized a bunch of words I knew in English that ended in -tion were the same in Spanish as the ending of -ción, that helped me grasp more Spanish as well. Words such as celebración, ficción, and nación just made sense.
  • -idad: It turns a word that sounds like a word I know in English into an -ity word like difficulty -> dificultad or sustainability -> sustenibilidad.
  • -oso/osa: Words that end in English with -ous end in -oso/osa in Spanish. For example, curious -> curioso/curiosa or famous -> famoso/famosa.

Other Tips

• As I mentioned above, learning vocabulary through the combination of seeing the word and hearing it (like in some language learning apps like Drops (again, an awesome app for the CI in my opinion) or Beelingua or even Duolingo) will help with reading comprehension or when you are out in the world and come across Spanish text.
• I can't recommend enough if you are starting, you need to watch videos on YouTube about pronouncing the Spanish alphabet. It will help in the long run big time, even if you stay a DS purist because it will eventually translate into more easily reading or picking up on what's said so you can get how it probably looks like spelled out in your brain if you need to.
• Watching videos or reading posts where people share their hitting DS levels and what it's been like has encouraged me to keep going.
• Going to Hispanic grocery stores or restaurants or looking up the lyrics to Spanish-speaking songs I like has also motivated me when I hear or read some words and get what's being said or sung. Big boost to my desire to study more.
• Explore the culture of the language around your neighborhood or city. I buy a lot of random things from the Hispanic grocery store which has taught me a bit more of Spanish than what I've gotten through DS or the apps I used. Going to Mexican restaurants or a tapas restaurant also helps me with increasing my vocabulary. When in New York City, I swung by Spanish Harlem and enjoyed reading advertisements around the neighborhood or on the subway and trying to translate them in my head which helped me feel more confident in my progress.

The Positive Feedback Loop of DS

I'm really glad I found DS and this subreddit, because it supercharged my Spanish studies. Realizing I'm understanding a bit more here and there (usually noticing tiny improvements daily) is really exciting to me.
I also agree with CI's point about comprehension vs. standard learning methods. If you can't understand what's being said, your communication skills (like me listening to French is spotty at best and I can grasp certain words) will be limited. Using DS as my main source of learning and how the teachers will draw or otherwise illustrate what's being said definitely helps solidify the ideas being communicated with builds upon where you hear it being used otherwise.
With my app usage, it's reinforced what I've learned in DS and DS has reinforced what I'm learning in DS or podcasts.
When I'm feeling stuck, I put on videos of other DS learners and listen to them sharing what positives they are getting from using DS or their Spanish speaking experiences and improvements they've noticed. It helps me refocus on my studies which end up helping me notice the improvements.
When you are learning a language which is like conceptually climbing a mountain, you can lose site of how far you've come if you are only looking ahead to how much you still have to go unless you look back. I recommend occasionally going back to easier content like new or even old DS videos of a previous learning tier or listening to podcasts that were tricky long ago and get that big boost from just how much you now do comprehend versus how much you struggled or kind of got what was being communicated.
Most of all, just enjoy the ride which I've found Dreaming Spanish really makes a lot of fun, especially the ridiculous content of all the DS content creators I've watched so far. Pablo's deadpan ridiculous videos with such facts as his body is made up of 85% mango just crack me up and make learning much more enjoyable than other methods or silly videos about Calcetín's adventures, cooking mishaps, or whatever goofy and entertaining things the DS people come up with.
I got a bit of a boost recently at my favorite Mexican restaurant when I asked the waitress if what I thought would be correct in ordering what I ordered was actually right. "Quiero enchilada chipotle sin arroz, pero con frijoles" encouraged her to correct me to refrijoles, and also we started chatting about where she was from. She mentioned she was from El Salvador and from my podcast listening and hearing all about breakfast food choices people make, I asked her about pan dulce for breakfast. She recommended that I check out a El Salvadorean panadería and get a traditional pan dulce from El Salvadoreans—quesadilla salvadoreña which was a really tasty pan dulce to have for breakfast. It also got her excitedly sharing more about her culture which also motivated me to keep learning.
Another bit of exciting Spanish interactions came when I went to El Salvadorean restaurant and asked for atole de elote. One of the women in the kitchen came up to me and was so surprised that I asked for that. She asked how I even heard about that and mentioned that I was learning Spanish and I heard a lot of discussions about various atole that there are out there. It was a very interesting hot drink made with sweet corn which I never would have ordered otherwise.
Thanks for reading however much you actually read and thanks to all on the subreddit for inspiring me to keep on going thanks to the success stories, the silly DS memes, or even talking about how much you love one of the DS content creators. I really appreciate you all and your contributions to this subreddit!