Nursing head to assessment writing sample
Lyricism in YWGBYST
2024.05.16 06:59 Nohopup Lyricism in YWGBYST
Everyone seems to be digging this album, so I suppose ill strike while the iron is hot here - does anyone else find the level of lyricism in this album not only a high point for the band (though frankly, they've always had good lyricism especially for the scene they're in), but also just very solid even out of the musical context?
I'll admit to being a bit of a nerd when it comes to writing and lit, and after listening to the album I sat down and listened again while reading through the lyrics of each song as they played and was left with a few standouts.
1) From the initial track, 'Thirst.'
Followed by the thirst An honest gaze left broken and marred
...
Dragging my knuckles Forward but through the mud Secluded lower form Sickened by my thirst for change
..
Though not the strongest lyrics on the album, still evocative imagery and impressively emotionally compelling while also being careful in its diction. Like the message of the song (and extending to the album, really) the song comes with a sense of jagged brevity which to me adds to the poignancy of it. It also sets the continuing motif of water being an agent of change, something which continues throughout the project.
2) From 'Don't Reach For Me'
I dream of a cleansing wave Reborn Don't reach for me No lies can spread (Spread, spread) From a tongue removed
..
I dream of a cleansing wave Set me free I return to form No longer bound to mе
Though this track is much more on the nose, largely characterized by the visceral and aggressive dogma that metalcore is known for, is still points back to the previous ideals and symbolism established in the initial tracks. Again we are lent the idea that water will wash away (erode, even) our imperfections. Change will aid in the 'return to form,' grief and harbored grudges 'no longer bound to me."
3*)* This one is cheating, as it's really the whole song of 'Moss Covers All' with its 46 second run time:
This house just swallows me It doesn't feel like it did before Trapped in endless rain Barren moor
And all the vines will find their way Through the dirt and hardened clay
The wind and rain will force decay Moss covers all
This frankly reads pretty well even as spoken word poetry. From the established messages of conflicting ideals of faith, self, and loss, we are given the line 'Trapped in endless rain, barren moor.' This deep into the album the layers have been stripped away, and we get the image of rocks, stripped and naked (barren) being exposed to the harsh elements of rain (water) again. Over time, despite everything, this allows moss and roots to crack and mold them. Neat.
4) Jumping from 'Moss Covers All' immediately into 'The Calm that keeps You Awake'
You fill your home with waves Nothing still can stay When the storm starts to recede Parting clouds reveal your grief Nothing still can stay
Hey look at that! Water enacting change again. Who'da thunk? While not super overt and beating you over the head every track, the album continues its steady use of the metaphor. I'm impressed by how lyrically cohesive and well stated the album is, with this never coming across as corny. Again, the imagery lent from the lyrics are both very well done and somewhat understated, especially when examined through the context of typical metalcore lyricism.
5) Closing with 'Sit and Mourn'
Collecting petals of every memory All I'm left with is all I know (I know) Finding my own time to sit and mourn Grief that spreads but will not show
..
A test at every turn All I focus on is strength I will carry you through fire
Loss we share means swallowing pain Will you inherit my grief If I finally choose to sleep?
..
"Why'd you leave?" "I feel like I'vе failed."
I really, really like this closing track. The amazing mixing, use of ambience, and killer vocals / instrumentals aside, I found the change in expression super neat here. Once again we are given the notion of grief expressed as petals. i.e. plant life and growth. While capable of shattering and eroding rocks (barren moore, yada yada) it also can create beauty. Grief then once again can be seen as spreading through the soil, unseen from above.
This final use of the recurrent theme is then given its needed closing juxtaposition, as they express the strength needed to 'carry you through fire.' While the grief and doubt expressed thus far has always been in the processing stage, prone to mourning and self reflection, in this last closing cacophony we are seeing the narrator of the album push aside their own feelings to help someone through the immediate feelings of loss and rage and pain that come from a fresh loss. Then, the expressed doubt of if the narrator gives up, will the party they are helping have that fire smolder and die, finding themselves dealing the cold, liquid grief we've heard about up to this point.
The final eerie quote from this track implies that this did happen, and the cycle of the album will continue as this person who could not be helped slips into the thirst for change within their heart, and the constant state of erosion granted by that search.
TL;DR - This album rocks in a lot of ways, and I think the lyrics are a huge part.
submitted by Nohopup to knockedloose [link] [comments]
I'll admit to being a bit of a nerd when it comes to writing and lit, and after listening to the album I sat down and listened again while reading through the lyrics of each song as they played and was left with a few standouts.
1) From the initial track, 'Thirst.'
Followed by the thirst An honest gaze left broken and marred
...
Dragging my knuckles Forward but through the mud Secluded lower form Sickened by my thirst for change
..
Though not the strongest lyrics on the album, still evocative imagery and impressively emotionally compelling while also being careful in its diction. Like the message of the song (and extending to the album, really) the song comes with a sense of jagged brevity which to me adds to the poignancy of it. It also sets the continuing motif of water being an agent of change, something which continues throughout the project.
2) From 'Don't Reach For Me'
I dream of a cleansing wave Reborn Don't reach for me No lies can spread (Spread, spread) From a tongue removed
..
I dream of a cleansing wave Set me free I return to form No longer bound to mе
Though this track is much more on the nose, largely characterized by the visceral and aggressive dogma that metalcore is known for, is still points back to the previous ideals and symbolism established in the initial tracks. Again we are lent the idea that water will wash away (erode, even) our imperfections. Change will aid in the 'return to form,' grief and harbored grudges 'no longer bound to me."
3*)* This one is cheating, as it's really the whole song of 'Moss Covers All' with its 46 second run time:
This house just swallows me It doesn't feel like it did before Trapped in endless rain Barren moor
And all the vines will find their way Through the dirt and hardened clay
The wind and rain will force decay Moss covers all
This frankly reads pretty well even as spoken word poetry. From the established messages of conflicting ideals of faith, self, and loss, we are given the line 'Trapped in endless rain, barren moor.' This deep into the album the layers have been stripped away, and we get the image of rocks, stripped and naked (barren) being exposed to the harsh elements of rain (water) again. Over time, despite everything, this allows moss and roots to crack and mold them. Neat.
4) Jumping from 'Moss Covers All' immediately into 'The Calm that keeps You Awake'
You fill your home with waves Nothing still can stay When the storm starts to recede Parting clouds reveal your grief Nothing still can stay
Hey look at that! Water enacting change again. Who'da thunk? While not super overt and beating you over the head every track, the album continues its steady use of the metaphor. I'm impressed by how lyrically cohesive and well stated the album is, with this never coming across as corny. Again, the imagery lent from the lyrics are both very well done and somewhat understated, especially when examined through the context of typical metalcore lyricism.
5) Closing with 'Sit and Mourn'
Collecting petals of every memory All I'm left with is all I know (I know) Finding my own time to sit and mourn Grief that spreads but will not show
..
A test at every turn All I focus on is strength I will carry you through fire
Loss we share means swallowing pain Will you inherit my grief If I finally choose to sleep?
..
"Why'd you leave?" "I feel like I'vе failed."
I really, really like this closing track. The amazing mixing, use of ambience, and killer vocals / instrumentals aside, I found the change in expression super neat here. Once again we are given the notion of grief expressed as petals. i.e. plant life and growth. While capable of shattering and eroding rocks (barren moore, yada yada) it also can create beauty. Grief then once again can be seen as spreading through the soil, unseen from above.
This final use of the recurrent theme is then given its needed closing juxtaposition, as they express the strength needed to 'carry you through fire.' While the grief and doubt expressed thus far has always been in the processing stage, prone to mourning and self reflection, in this last closing cacophony we are seeing the narrator of the album push aside their own feelings to help someone through the immediate feelings of loss and rage and pain that come from a fresh loss. Then, the expressed doubt of if the narrator gives up, will the party they are helping have that fire smolder and die, finding themselves dealing the cold, liquid grief we've heard about up to this point.
The final eerie quote from this track implies that this did happen, and the cycle of the album will continue as this person who could not be helped slips into the thirst for change within their heart, and the constant state of erosion granted by that search.
TL;DR - This album rocks in a lot of ways, and I think the lyrics are a huge part.
2024.05.16 06:56 Krayzfrog There’s something off with the people on campus
I think there’s something off about my campus
Hey everyone, I’m typing this on my phone so I apologize if there is weird formatting. Anyways, to get to the point, there’s something really off with some people on my campus. I have come seeking answers.I noticed it first walking home from my 7pm class last Wednesday.
To set the scene, most of the campus is tucked back into the woods a little, and my 7pm class is in the farthest building from the parking lot (further into the woods). I get out from that 7pm class around 9pm, so on cloudy nights like last Wednesday, the only lights on that long sidewalk are the lights radiating from the other buildings. Usually, there’s roughly 30 feet where it’s pitch black because the foliage is pretty dense. I usually walk back to my apartment with some classmates that live in the same complex as me, but I told them to go ahead of me while I finished the rest of the project.
After packing my laptop away, I started heading back home. It was roughly 9:30 at this point, and my brain was slowly shutting down preparing for the deep sleep that has yet to come.Walking down the sidewalk, I heard somebody not too far into the woods laughing like they’ve just heard the funniest joke ever. I immediately thought, “probably some Freshman walking the trails with their friends smoking weed”. Chuckling to myself, I put in my AirPods and picked a playlist for my journey back home.
When I looked up from my phone, there was the silhouette of somebody walking towards me. I have no idea how I missed them before, but honestly, it’s very possible they were just in a spot where the light wasn’t quite reaching them. A little unnerved, I shifted over to the left side of the sidewalk.
(Now I’m usually fine walking alone at night; I’m a 6’2 man who’s dabbled in the world of MMA. But something about this person gave me a primal feeling of unrest.)
When they shifted over to the left mirroring me, I felt my blood run cold. But alas, I had to keep walking because this was my only way back home. As I neared closer to the figure, I almost laughed at myself when I realized it was just some harmless girl walking towards the Murphy building. If anything, I’m the intimidating one to her.
This is where it really gets weird. She stopped as I was passing her and turned to me. Thinking she needed to ask me something, I took an AirPod out and asked “what’s up?”. After staring at me for an uncomfortable amount of time, she opened her mouth, and I kid you not, mimicked the laugh I heard moments before perfectly. Before I could chalk it up to it just being her in the trails earlier, I noticed something. Her mouth wasn’t moving at all. If I had left my AirPods in, it would just look like she was just opening her mouth and staring at me. She then shifted into a deep raspy laugh. She did all of this without moving her mouth at all; I couldn’t even see her throat moving as you would expect if someone was laughing. It was almost like she was some fucked up human-shaped gramophone. The feeling of absolute horror that came over me is something I’ve only experienced in my imagination. Before I could think to do anything next, My body began to run off some sort of primal instinct. With my legs burning, it took me about 10 minutes to get all the way back to my apartment and lock myself in relative safety.
I’m coming on here now to ask if anybody knows what I experienced? I have been hearing that same laughter outside my window every night since that night, I am too terrified to sleep well and have refused to go to any of my classes. Please I just want answers, I don’t want to keep living in fear.
Part 2:
Hey everyone, I’ve gotten some DMs telling me what it may be. I’ve heard everything from banshee to skinwalker. After further research I pray to god it was neither of them. I’m praying it was just some girl with a speaker playing some sort of cruel joke. I mean yes there are people who don’t like me on campus, I’ve made some enemies over the past 4 years. But, I just don’t understand what could’ve brought it to this point. I had to stop hiding in fear and go to my classes before my grades plummet, I’m almost done with my degree and only have a few more weeks. If I let some sort of stupid prank ruin my career, It would be everything I swore against to my parents.
A lot of you guys in the DMs were also asking what college I go to and what my name is. First I want to say sorry for not providing that information in the first post, I’m sure you can understand where my head was at typing that. So let me introduce myself, my name is Nick and In order to keep my privacy, I will only provide that I go to a midwest university.
I’m sure you may be wondering, “so did it just stop?”. I would love to say yes, but really things have just gotten weirder. Though, I am pleased to say that there is no longer laughing out my window every night.
Ever since that night, I’ve been noticing more things off with the people on campus. Now you may just think it’s paranoia, but just be patient and listen.
Yesterday, I decided to muster up all of my courage and go to class. Luckily my first class is at 10AM, when the sun is well in the sky, so walking across campus seemed much less threatening. When I sat down in my first class, I noticed something off with the girl that sits in front of me. Usually she’s chatty and excited to be in class, but today she just stared blankly ahead. I tried to say good morning and ask about her weekend, as we do every Monday, but she continued to have that blank stare. She did turn her head towards be, but her eyes read “lights on, but nobody is home”.
Thinking to myself, she may just be hungover, or going through the bout of college student depression. I decided to shrug it off and turn to the front of the class and get my notes ready. But the moment I turned around, I could feel it. Her eyes burrowing deep into the back of my head. When I flipped around to see if I was just being irrational, I quickly learned I wasn’t. Her eyes went from the blank glare, to the most enthusiastic face I’ve seen on her. It was horrible, it almost seemed like she was trying so hard to pretend she was thrilled to be in class and to speak to me. It was inhuman.
I’ve been on the internet long enough to catch on to the term “Uncanny valley”, and what I witnessed In my first hour gives me that same gut feeling I got when I saw that girl last Wednesday.
I was right to be uncomfortable though, I texted her after class to make sure she was doing alright. But her response only reignited the flames of deep fear burning in my soul.
I’ll copy and paste the messages here:
Me: Hey Is everything good? You seemed off in class today.
Steph SCI 101: Uh yeah, I’m fine. but I was not in class today, I’m severely hungover from Tanner’s party last night.
Me: Haha, good one.
Steph SCI 101: No I’m so Fr, are you okay?
Steph SCI 101: Are you trying to fuck with me or something?
Me: Nevermind, I’m sorry to bother you.
(End Of Texts)
Okay so I’m sure that this gives you all the same feeling of dread that it gave me but I’m sure scaled down a bit. This is where I have started to doubt that it’s a prank, because me and Stephanie are cool. There’s no level of hate for either of us, and even if it was some joke, we don’t know each other on that type of level.
Not only did this seem to happen in my first class, but in between classes while I was walking across campus as well. I walk past hundreds of faces in my many treks across campus, and I swear to you, at least 1/4th of the people I walked past had that same dead stare look. And the way they walked, god I hate even thinking of it. It was like they were an alien trying out their new body suits for the first time. The steps and the bends of their legs just seem so meticulous, dramaticized, and puppeteered.
I’m going to try to investigate further, because at this point my fear for my life is more of a reason to try and figure out what it is so I can try to stop it.
I’m no hero, and I’m sure as hell nothing special, but If I can know what to expect for another encounter, maybe I can avoid meeting the demise I have imagined.
Part 3
I had a strange dream last night, stranger than usual at least. I awoke in the woods, laying face down in the grass with someone looming over me. I heard their footsteps flee rapidly before I flipped over. I found myself just off the trail where the “incident” happened, on the trail laid a girl, bloodied and motionless. When I got up to approach her, she was quickly dragged into the parallel section of the woods. Seeing this I turned and ran into the section of woods I was in. When my legs gave out I found myself near an old supply shed, worn and long abandoned. Searching for cover, I tried the door, which luckily gave after a quick pull. There I found a trapdoor which emanated a blue hue through the cracks. The only thought on my mind, survival brought me to throw it open and climb down. I clattered down the ladder and right before my feet touched the ground, I was pulled backwards by my shirt. That’s where I woke up.
I have always trusted my gut and having a dream that vivid gave me a sense of courage I did not previously have. I know where to start my search now. I have decided my best course of action will be to record my findings on a tape recorder app. After I finish each entry it will be uploaded to a cloud that will ensure if anything happens to me, the story will get out. I am packing my backpack now with a flashlight, glow sticks to mark my trail, and a machete I was gifted by a local in Mexico. All of my recordings will be uploaded below and auto posted after 10 days. Wish me luck everyone, I’m going to need it.
Entry 1: I have started at the only place that makes sense, the trail. It is currently 1:45 PM and I have plenty of sun left in the sky. I just needed to find exactly where to start my journey into the woods. Strangely it was very easy to find. I recall one of the trees having a funky twist near the middle of the trunk. Probably just some two lovebirds trying to carve their name into the tree and realizing there were softer trees to carve into. Anyways hiking further into the woods I believe I can see the shape of the shed through the branches. I wish you guys could see how dense these trees are so you can understand my struggle.
Entry 2: I made it to the shed, but unfortunately the floor in here is concrete. This really sucks for me because I have absolutely no idea where to go from here. It’s identical on the outside but I just don’t understand. Maybe I’m just delusional, which in that case what a waste of time and energy. I’m going to head back home and just start packing for summer. Maybe it’ll be best if I just forget about all of this and leave it behind me. I am graduating after all. Wait hold on what is this?? there’s a button behind one of these shelves. I am going to press it, but idk how it would work because this floor is seamless. I’m just going to leave this recording so if anything does happen I don’t have to worry about holding the phone the whole time. Holy shit, the entire floor is lowering. It’s a fucking elevator.
Entry 3: Okay so I’ve been going down this elevator for like 30 seconds, how far down am I going?.. Oh wait hold on, Im stopped… There’s a metal door with a padlock. Ig since I have the machete there’s only one thing to do, break it. Im going to use the blunt side so I don’t ruin this thing, I like it too much. the lock clatters to the ground after 3 solid hits. Well ig there’s only one way to go now, there’s no button to get back up so I pray there’s another way up. The metal door creaks loudly. Fuck I regret this, It’s dark and I can tell it’s a big area because it’s so echoey in here. I’m currently praising my past self for thinking about the flashlight and glow sticks. I need to find out what in the hell this place is and most importantly, if there’s a damn light switch.
Entry 4: God this place is terrifying I’ve been walking around the sterile white halls of this place for like 10 minutes and have found nothing, no doors, no light switch. I feel like a rat in a maze. Also scratch what I said about being glad I packed glow sticks, because my stupid ass only brought like 20 of these things and I’m already down to 5. Also I feel like I’m not alone, every now and then I’ll turn a corner and the glow from the previous glow stick quickly vanishes. I feel like it might just be because the darkness seems to envelop everything like a blanket. But I have that feeling that I’m being followed. You know the one, where you know somethings wrong you just can’t pin point what it is. Oh shit no way, there’s light, I think there’s a door or something up ahead.
Entry 5: Holy shit… It’s a lab, and worse, there’s people strapped too tables, completely naked and unconscious. I know they are alive because each of them are hooked up with a million different cords, and one of those are plugged into a heart monitor. This place is huge, there has to be at least 50 people on these tables.
“Hey you, you’re not supposed to be in here” yelled a man adorned in a lab coat.
“What are you doing to these kids you sick fucks.” I yelled back at the man across the lab.
In a haste the scientist rushes towards a red button, setting off a loud alarm, turning the lights to a flashing red. With no exit behind me, I could only do one thing... Rush towards him. My training kicked in as I launched into a flurry of calculated strikes. My first hit connected, a right overhand clean under his eye. The doctor stumbled back, but I didn't give him a chance to recover. I pressed the attack, keeping him off balance with a relentless barrage of punches and kicks. He fought back ferociously, but I was one step ahead, anticipating his moves and countering with swift, efficient strikes. We wrestled, the room around us becoming a blur of pain and adrenaline. I used the environment to my advantage, improvising weapons from the scattered medical equipment and turning the empty tables on my opponent. Pinning him to the ground, I laid down a harsh barrage of final blows. His face was a bloody pulp, unrecognizable. But I didn’t walk away unscathed, somewhere in the tussle, the scientist buried a scalpel deep into my stomach. With my adrenaline wearing off, the pain overtook me, sending me into darkness as I fainted from the blood loss and adrenaline dump. I awoke with my arms and legs strapped to the cold metal operating table. Before I could try to struggle, a face overtook my field of vision.
“Quite a fight you put up, you turned poor Dr.Samson into a soup” the looming face said with a chuckle. “You are the first person to put the pieces together and for that I am thoroughly impressed Mr. Hayes”
“Who are you?!” I said fighting at my binds. “Let me go!”
“I’m afraid I can’t do that Mr.Hayes. You have seen far too much, and I definitely can’t have you running around telling the world what you saw here. Although nobody would believe you.” “And to answer your other question, I’m surprised you don’t recognize me… really take a moment and look at me” He said pulling down his face mask.
“Dr.Blackwood?” I said as I looked back on my freshman year biology class.
“Ding ding ding ding. We have a winner!” He said in a maniac joy.
“What are you going to do to me?” I asked.
“Well Mr.Hayes, first I’m going to sew you up from your little tussle you had with my late assistant and then I will put you under and cut into that skull of yours and take out a small piece of what we call in the science world your hippocampus. Then I will draw from that all of the necessary memories to create the perfect clone of you.” He responded.
“Why? Why would you need a clone of any of us. Why can’t you just clone someone willing to be apart of this?” I asked
“Because that’s no fun Mr.Hayes, the hunt excites me. Actually you’re lucky I didn’t get you the first night. Unfortunately my creation had a little bit of a malfunction and formed a wee bit of an attachment to you. I’m sure you remember the ruckus outside your window? Anyways I digress, I do this because everyone of you lowly students will go onto do mediocre jobs where you waste away at a desk. I must also add that with having a clone of you under my control, I can do anything and get away with clean hands. My plan with you originally was to have you go into the admissions office and steal every last cent all for me. On top of that I like the power, because one day I will have a clone of every student on this campus and eventually I will cause a revolt against our comedy of a government. Who will stop me, when I won’t even be on the front lines?” Dr.Blackwood explained.
“I will” I said freeing my last hand from the binds.
What he didn’t realize is that with all of this monologue and the questions I had been feeding him, I was slowly loosening my binds with each wiggle and movement in retaliation.
Lurching forward I grab onto his collar, pulling him into a vicious headbutt. The impact sent Dr. Blackwood reeling backward, his grip on consciousness loosening as he staggered. Seizing the moment, I lunged off the table, adrenaline coursing through my veins despite the searing pain in my abdomen. With a swift motion, I grabbed a nearby surgical instrument, holding it in a defensive stance as I faced my adversary. Dr. Blackwood, recovering from the blow, snarled with rage, his once calm demeanor now replaced by a feral intensity. The room seemed to shrink around us, the tension thickening with each passing second. This was my chance to stop Blackwood's twisted plans. As he lunged forward, I met his attack head-on, the clang of metal reverberating through the room. Blow after blow, we fought with an intensity born of desperation and determination. Despite my injuries, I refused to yield, driven by a fire burnt under me to protect myself and others from Blackwood's actions . In a final, swift move, I delivered a powerful front kick, sending Blackwood crashing to the ground. The room fell silent, the echoes of our struggle fading into the darkness. Coughing he sat in the corner laughing with blood spilling down his face. “You know that it’s too late to save any of these one lying on the tables. I would’ve released you, you know that right? I would’ve simply taken your memory from today out of your brain and leaving you in your bed to wake up thinking you had a fun night” he said with final resolve as he watched me grab the scalpel from the ground taking slow steps near him.
Looking down over him, It was my turn to laugh. Kneeling down to eye level with him I grabbed him by his hair and delivered a final message to him “Fuck you and your little science experiment” as I sliced deep into his throat watching the life fade from his eyes.
I eventually found an exit door, which lead me to a storm drain deep in the woods far from my campus. It took me 2 hours to limp my way onto a main road and flag down a passing car. Pulling over I was rushed to the hospital and later interrogated by some men in suits, my guess is CIA. Here I am now, writing my final entrance. I think I heard them say something about trying a new medical process on me to help me heal quicker
submitted by Krayzfrog to CreepsMcPasta [link] [comments]
Hey everyone, I’m typing this on my phone so I apologize if there is weird formatting. Anyways, to get to the point, there’s something really off with some people on my campus. I have come seeking answers.I noticed it first walking home from my 7pm class last Wednesday.
To set the scene, most of the campus is tucked back into the woods a little, and my 7pm class is in the farthest building from the parking lot (further into the woods). I get out from that 7pm class around 9pm, so on cloudy nights like last Wednesday, the only lights on that long sidewalk are the lights radiating from the other buildings. Usually, there’s roughly 30 feet where it’s pitch black because the foliage is pretty dense. I usually walk back to my apartment with some classmates that live in the same complex as me, but I told them to go ahead of me while I finished the rest of the project.
After packing my laptop away, I started heading back home. It was roughly 9:30 at this point, and my brain was slowly shutting down preparing for the deep sleep that has yet to come.Walking down the sidewalk, I heard somebody not too far into the woods laughing like they’ve just heard the funniest joke ever. I immediately thought, “probably some Freshman walking the trails with their friends smoking weed”. Chuckling to myself, I put in my AirPods and picked a playlist for my journey back home.
When I looked up from my phone, there was the silhouette of somebody walking towards me. I have no idea how I missed them before, but honestly, it’s very possible they were just in a spot where the light wasn’t quite reaching them. A little unnerved, I shifted over to the left side of the sidewalk.
(Now I’m usually fine walking alone at night; I’m a 6’2 man who’s dabbled in the world of MMA. But something about this person gave me a primal feeling of unrest.)
When they shifted over to the left mirroring me, I felt my blood run cold. But alas, I had to keep walking because this was my only way back home. As I neared closer to the figure, I almost laughed at myself when I realized it was just some harmless girl walking towards the Murphy building. If anything, I’m the intimidating one to her.
This is where it really gets weird. She stopped as I was passing her and turned to me. Thinking she needed to ask me something, I took an AirPod out and asked “what’s up?”. After staring at me for an uncomfortable amount of time, she opened her mouth, and I kid you not, mimicked the laugh I heard moments before perfectly. Before I could chalk it up to it just being her in the trails earlier, I noticed something. Her mouth wasn’t moving at all. If I had left my AirPods in, it would just look like she was just opening her mouth and staring at me. She then shifted into a deep raspy laugh. She did all of this without moving her mouth at all; I couldn’t even see her throat moving as you would expect if someone was laughing. It was almost like she was some fucked up human-shaped gramophone. The feeling of absolute horror that came over me is something I’ve only experienced in my imagination. Before I could think to do anything next, My body began to run off some sort of primal instinct. With my legs burning, it took me about 10 minutes to get all the way back to my apartment and lock myself in relative safety.
I’m coming on here now to ask if anybody knows what I experienced? I have been hearing that same laughter outside my window every night since that night, I am too terrified to sleep well and have refused to go to any of my classes. Please I just want answers, I don’t want to keep living in fear.
Part 2:
Hey everyone, I’ve gotten some DMs telling me what it may be. I’ve heard everything from banshee to skinwalker. After further research I pray to god it was neither of them. I’m praying it was just some girl with a speaker playing some sort of cruel joke. I mean yes there are people who don’t like me on campus, I’ve made some enemies over the past 4 years. But, I just don’t understand what could’ve brought it to this point. I had to stop hiding in fear and go to my classes before my grades plummet, I’m almost done with my degree and only have a few more weeks. If I let some sort of stupid prank ruin my career, It would be everything I swore against to my parents.
A lot of you guys in the DMs were also asking what college I go to and what my name is. First I want to say sorry for not providing that information in the first post, I’m sure you can understand where my head was at typing that. So let me introduce myself, my name is Nick and In order to keep my privacy, I will only provide that I go to a midwest university.
I’m sure you may be wondering, “so did it just stop?”. I would love to say yes, but really things have just gotten weirder. Though, I am pleased to say that there is no longer laughing out my window every night.
Ever since that night, I’ve been noticing more things off with the people on campus. Now you may just think it’s paranoia, but just be patient and listen.
Yesterday, I decided to muster up all of my courage and go to class. Luckily my first class is at 10AM, when the sun is well in the sky, so walking across campus seemed much less threatening. When I sat down in my first class, I noticed something off with the girl that sits in front of me. Usually she’s chatty and excited to be in class, but today she just stared blankly ahead. I tried to say good morning and ask about her weekend, as we do every Monday, but she continued to have that blank stare. She did turn her head towards be, but her eyes read “lights on, but nobody is home”.
Thinking to myself, she may just be hungover, or going through the bout of college student depression. I decided to shrug it off and turn to the front of the class and get my notes ready. But the moment I turned around, I could feel it. Her eyes burrowing deep into the back of my head. When I flipped around to see if I was just being irrational, I quickly learned I wasn’t. Her eyes went from the blank glare, to the most enthusiastic face I’ve seen on her. It was horrible, it almost seemed like she was trying so hard to pretend she was thrilled to be in class and to speak to me. It was inhuman.
I’ve been on the internet long enough to catch on to the term “Uncanny valley”, and what I witnessed In my first hour gives me that same gut feeling I got when I saw that girl last Wednesday.
I was right to be uncomfortable though, I texted her after class to make sure she was doing alright. But her response only reignited the flames of deep fear burning in my soul.
I’ll copy and paste the messages here:
Me: Hey Is everything good? You seemed off in class today.
Steph SCI 101: Uh yeah, I’m fine. but I was not in class today, I’m severely hungover from Tanner’s party last night.
Me: Haha, good one.
Steph SCI 101: No I’m so Fr, are you okay?
Steph SCI 101: Are you trying to fuck with me or something?
Me: Nevermind, I’m sorry to bother you.
(End Of Texts)
Okay so I’m sure that this gives you all the same feeling of dread that it gave me but I’m sure scaled down a bit. This is where I have started to doubt that it’s a prank, because me and Stephanie are cool. There’s no level of hate for either of us, and even if it was some joke, we don’t know each other on that type of level.
Not only did this seem to happen in my first class, but in between classes while I was walking across campus as well. I walk past hundreds of faces in my many treks across campus, and I swear to you, at least 1/4th of the people I walked past had that same dead stare look. And the way they walked, god I hate even thinking of it. It was like they were an alien trying out their new body suits for the first time. The steps and the bends of their legs just seem so meticulous, dramaticized, and puppeteered.
I’m going to try to investigate further, because at this point my fear for my life is more of a reason to try and figure out what it is so I can try to stop it.
I’m no hero, and I’m sure as hell nothing special, but If I can know what to expect for another encounter, maybe I can avoid meeting the demise I have imagined.
Part 3
First off I would like to apologize for my 20-day hiatus. For those who were worried that curiosity killed the cat so to speak, I appreciate your concern. On top of my investigation, I have also had to go through finals and work for a boss who didn't believe in life outside of work. So let's start where we left off. I had a feeling that this task was left for me to solve. it may sound stupid, but let me explain why. That night, after my last post, I had a dream that further solidified my need to solve the mystery. I tried to write all that I remembered down the morning after so here is what I wrote.April 4th, 2024
I had a strange dream last night, stranger than usual at least. I awoke in the woods, laying face down in the grass with someone looming over me. I heard their footsteps flee rapidly before I flipped over. I found myself just off the trail where the “incident” happened, on the trail laid a girl, bloodied and motionless. When I got up to approach her, she was quickly dragged into the parallel section of the woods. Seeing this I turned and ran into the section of woods I was in. When my legs gave out I found myself near an old supply shed, worn and long abandoned. Searching for cover, I tried the door, which luckily gave after a quick pull. There I found a trapdoor which emanated a blue hue through the cracks. The only thought on my mind, survival brought me to throw it open and climb down. I clattered down the ladder and right before my feet touched the ground, I was pulled backwards by my shirt. That’s where I woke up.
I have always trusted my gut and having a dream that vivid gave me a sense of courage I did not previously have. I know where to start my search now. I have decided my best course of action will be to record my findings on a tape recorder app. After I finish each entry it will be uploaded to a cloud that will ensure if anything happens to me, the story will get out. I am packing my backpack now with a flashlight, glow sticks to mark my trail, and a machete I was gifted by a local in Mexico. All of my recordings will be uploaded below and auto posted after 10 days. Wish me luck everyone, I’m going to need it.
Entry 1: I have started at the only place that makes sense, the trail. It is currently 1:45 PM and I have plenty of sun left in the sky. I just needed to find exactly where to start my journey into the woods. Strangely it was very easy to find. I recall one of the trees having a funky twist near the middle of the trunk. Probably just some two lovebirds trying to carve their name into the tree and realizing there were softer trees to carve into. Anyways hiking further into the woods I believe I can see the shape of the shed through the branches. I wish you guys could see how dense these trees are so you can understand my struggle.
Entry 2: I made it to the shed, but unfortunately the floor in here is concrete. This really sucks for me because I have absolutely no idea where to go from here. It’s identical on the outside but I just don’t understand. Maybe I’m just delusional, which in that case what a waste of time and energy. I’m going to head back home and just start packing for summer. Maybe it’ll be best if I just forget about all of this and leave it behind me. I am graduating after all. Wait hold on what is this?? there’s a button behind one of these shelves. I am going to press it, but idk how it would work because this floor is seamless. I’m just going to leave this recording so if anything does happen I don’t have to worry about holding the phone the whole time. Holy shit, the entire floor is lowering. It’s a fucking elevator.
Entry 3: Okay so I’ve been going down this elevator for like 30 seconds, how far down am I going?.. Oh wait hold on, Im stopped… There’s a metal door with a padlock. Ig since I have the machete there’s only one thing to do, break it. Im going to use the blunt side so I don’t ruin this thing, I like it too much. the lock clatters to the ground after 3 solid hits. Well ig there’s only one way to go now, there’s no button to get back up so I pray there’s another way up. The metal door creaks loudly. Fuck I regret this, It’s dark and I can tell it’s a big area because it’s so echoey in here. I’m currently praising my past self for thinking about the flashlight and glow sticks. I need to find out what in the hell this place is and most importantly, if there’s a damn light switch.
Entry 4: God this place is terrifying I’ve been walking around the sterile white halls of this place for like 10 minutes and have found nothing, no doors, no light switch. I feel like a rat in a maze. Also scratch what I said about being glad I packed glow sticks, because my stupid ass only brought like 20 of these things and I’m already down to 5. Also I feel like I’m not alone, every now and then I’ll turn a corner and the glow from the previous glow stick quickly vanishes. I feel like it might just be because the darkness seems to envelop everything like a blanket. But I have that feeling that I’m being followed. You know the one, where you know somethings wrong you just can’t pin point what it is. Oh shit no way, there’s light, I think there’s a door or something up ahead.
Entry 5: Holy shit… It’s a lab, and worse, there’s people strapped too tables, completely naked and unconscious. I know they are alive because each of them are hooked up with a million different cords, and one of those are plugged into a heart monitor. This place is huge, there has to be at least 50 people on these tables.
“Hey you, you’re not supposed to be in here” yelled a man adorned in a lab coat.
“What are you doing to these kids you sick fucks.” I yelled back at the man across the lab.
In a haste the scientist rushes towards a red button, setting off a loud alarm, turning the lights to a flashing red. With no exit behind me, I could only do one thing... Rush towards him. My training kicked in as I launched into a flurry of calculated strikes. My first hit connected, a right overhand clean under his eye. The doctor stumbled back, but I didn't give him a chance to recover. I pressed the attack, keeping him off balance with a relentless barrage of punches and kicks. He fought back ferociously, but I was one step ahead, anticipating his moves and countering with swift, efficient strikes. We wrestled, the room around us becoming a blur of pain and adrenaline. I used the environment to my advantage, improvising weapons from the scattered medical equipment and turning the empty tables on my opponent. Pinning him to the ground, I laid down a harsh barrage of final blows. His face was a bloody pulp, unrecognizable. But I didn’t walk away unscathed, somewhere in the tussle, the scientist buried a scalpel deep into my stomach. With my adrenaline wearing off, the pain overtook me, sending me into darkness as I fainted from the blood loss and adrenaline dump. I awoke with my arms and legs strapped to the cold metal operating table. Before I could try to struggle, a face overtook my field of vision.
“Quite a fight you put up, you turned poor Dr.Samson into a soup” the looming face said with a chuckle. “You are the first person to put the pieces together and for that I am thoroughly impressed Mr. Hayes”
“Who are you?!” I said fighting at my binds. “Let me go!”
“I’m afraid I can’t do that Mr.Hayes. You have seen far too much, and I definitely can’t have you running around telling the world what you saw here. Although nobody would believe you.” “And to answer your other question, I’m surprised you don’t recognize me… really take a moment and look at me” He said pulling down his face mask.
“Dr.Blackwood?” I said as I looked back on my freshman year biology class.
“Ding ding ding ding. We have a winner!” He said in a maniac joy.
“What are you going to do to me?” I asked.
“Well Mr.Hayes, first I’m going to sew you up from your little tussle you had with my late assistant and then I will put you under and cut into that skull of yours and take out a small piece of what we call in the science world your hippocampus. Then I will draw from that all of the necessary memories to create the perfect clone of you.” He responded.
“Why? Why would you need a clone of any of us. Why can’t you just clone someone willing to be apart of this?” I asked
“Because that’s no fun Mr.Hayes, the hunt excites me. Actually you’re lucky I didn’t get you the first night. Unfortunately my creation had a little bit of a malfunction and formed a wee bit of an attachment to you. I’m sure you remember the ruckus outside your window? Anyways I digress, I do this because everyone of you lowly students will go onto do mediocre jobs where you waste away at a desk. I must also add that with having a clone of you under my control, I can do anything and get away with clean hands. My plan with you originally was to have you go into the admissions office and steal every last cent all for me. On top of that I like the power, because one day I will have a clone of every student on this campus and eventually I will cause a revolt against our comedy of a government. Who will stop me, when I won’t even be on the front lines?” Dr.Blackwood explained.
“I will” I said freeing my last hand from the binds.
What he didn’t realize is that with all of this monologue and the questions I had been feeding him, I was slowly loosening my binds with each wiggle and movement in retaliation.
Lurching forward I grab onto his collar, pulling him into a vicious headbutt. The impact sent Dr. Blackwood reeling backward, his grip on consciousness loosening as he staggered. Seizing the moment, I lunged off the table, adrenaline coursing through my veins despite the searing pain in my abdomen. With a swift motion, I grabbed a nearby surgical instrument, holding it in a defensive stance as I faced my adversary. Dr. Blackwood, recovering from the blow, snarled with rage, his once calm demeanor now replaced by a feral intensity. The room seemed to shrink around us, the tension thickening with each passing second. This was my chance to stop Blackwood's twisted plans. As he lunged forward, I met his attack head-on, the clang of metal reverberating through the room. Blow after blow, we fought with an intensity born of desperation and determination. Despite my injuries, I refused to yield, driven by a fire burnt under me to protect myself and others from Blackwood's actions . In a final, swift move, I delivered a powerful front kick, sending Blackwood crashing to the ground. The room fell silent, the echoes of our struggle fading into the darkness. Coughing he sat in the corner laughing with blood spilling down his face. “You know that it’s too late to save any of these one lying on the tables. I would’ve released you, you know that right? I would’ve simply taken your memory from today out of your brain and leaving you in your bed to wake up thinking you had a fun night” he said with final resolve as he watched me grab the scalpel from the ground taking slow steps near him.
Looking down over him, It was my turn to laugh. Kneeling down to eye level with him I grabbed him by his hair and delivered a final message to him “Fuck you and your little science experiment” as I sliced deep into his throat watching the life fade from his eyes.
I eventually found an exit door, which lead me to a storm drain deep in the woods far from my campus. It took me 2 hours to limp my way onto a main road and flag down a passing car. Pulling over I was rushed to the hospital and later interrogated by some men in suits, my guess is CIA. Here I am now, writing my final entrance. I think I heard them say something about trying a new medical process on me to help me heal quicker
2024.05.16 06:55 Krayzfrog There’s something off with the people on campus
I think there’s something off about my campus
Hey everyone, I’m typing this on my phone so I apologize if there is weird formatting. Anyways, to get to the point, there’s something really off with some people on my campus. I have come seeking answers.I noticed it first walking home from my 7pm class last Wednesday.
To set the scene, most of the campus is tucked back into the woods a little, and my 7pm class is in the farthest building from the parking lot (further into the woods). I get out from that 7pm class around 9pm, so on cloudy nights like last Wednesday, the only lights on that long sidewalk are the lights radiating from the other buildings. Usually, there’s roughly 30 feet where it’s pitch black because the foliage is pretty dense. I usually walk back to my apartment with some classmates that live in the same complex as me, but I told them to go ahead of me while I finished the rest of the project.
After packing my laptop away, I started heading back home. It was roughly 9:30 at this point, and my brain was slowly shutting down preparing for the deep sleep that has yet to come.Walking down the sidewalk, I heard somebody not too far into the woods laughing like they’ve just heard the funniest joke ever. I immediately thought, “probably some Freshman walking the trails with their friends smoking weed”. Chuckling to myself, I put in my AirPods and picked a playlist for my journey back home.
When I looked up from my phone, there was the silhouette of somebody walking towards me. I have no idea how I missed them before, but honestly, it’s very possible they were just in a spot where the light wasn’t quite reaching them. A little unnerved, I shifted over to the left side of the sidewalk.
(Now I’m usually fine walking alone at night; I’m a 6’2 man who’s dabbled in the world of MMA. But something about this person gave me a primal feeling of unrest.)
When they shifted over to the left mirroring me, I felt my blood run cold. But alas, I had to keep walking because this was my only way back home. As I neared closer to the figure, I almost laughed at myself when I realized it was just some harmless girl walking towards the Murphy building. If anything, I’m the intimidating one to her.
This is where it really gets weird. She stopped as I was passing her and turned to me. Thinking she needed to ask me something, I took an AirPod out and asked “what’s up?”. After staring at me for an uncomfortable amount of time, she opened her mouth, and I kid you not, mimicked the laugh I heard moments before perfectly. Before I could chalk it up to it just being her in the trails earlier, I noticed something. Her mouth wasn’t moving at all. If I had left my AirPods in, it would just look like she was just opening her mouth and staring at me. She then shifted into a deep raspy laugh. She did all of this without moving her mouth at all; I couldn’t even see her throat moving as you would expect if someone was laughing. It was almost like she was some fucked up human-shaped gramophone. The feeling of absolute horror that came over me is something I’ve only experienced in my imagination. Before I could think to do anything next, My body began to run off some sort of primal instinct. With my legs burning, it took me about 10 minutes to get all the way back to my apartment and lock myself in relative safety.
I’m coming on here now to ask if anybody knows what I experienced? I have been hearing that same laughter outside my window every night since that night, I am too terrified to sleep well and have refused to go to any of my classes. Please I just want answers, I don’t want to keep living in fear.
Part 2:
Hey everyone, I’ve gotten some DMs telling me what it may be. I’ve heard everything from banshee to skinwalker. After further research I pray to god it was neither of them. I’m praying it was just some girl with a speaker playing some sort of cruel joke. I mean yes there are people who don’t like me on campus, I’ve made some enemies over the past 4 years. But, I just don’t understand what could’ve brought it to this point. I had to stop hiding in fear and go to my classes before my grades plummet, I’m almost done with my degree and only have a few more weeks. If I let some sort of stupid prank ruin my career, It would be everything I swore against to my parents.
A lot of you guys in the DMs were also asking what college I go to and what my name is. First I want to say sorry for not providing that information in the first post, I’m sure you can understand where my head was at typing that. So let me introduce myself, my name is Nick and In order to keep my privacy, I will only provide that I go to a midwest university.
I’m sure you may be wondering, “so did it just stop?”. I would love to say yes, but really things have just gotten weirder. Though, I am pleased to say that there is no longer laughing out my window every night.
Ever since that night, I’ve been noticing more things off with the people on campus. Now you may just think it’s paranoia, but just be patient and listen.
Yesterday, I decided to muster up all of my courage and go to class. Luckily my first class is at 10AM, when the sun is well in the sky, so walking across campus seemed much less threatening. When I sat down in my first class, I noticed something off with the girl that sits in front of me. Usually she’s chatty and excited to be in class, but today she just stared blankly ahead. I tried to say good morning and ask about her weekend, as we do every Monday, but she continued to have that blank stare. She did turn her head towards be, but her eyes read “lights on, but nobody is home”.
Thinking to myself, she may just be hungover, or going through the bout of college student depression. I decided to shrug it off and turn to the front of the class and get my notes ready. But the moment I turned around, I could feel it. Her eyes burrowing deep into the back of my head. When I flipped around to see if I was just being irrational, I quickly learned I wasn’t. Her eyes went from the blank glare, to the most enthusiastic face I’ve seen on her. It was horrible, it almost seemed like she was trying so hard to pretend she was thrilled to be in class and to speak to me. It was inhuman.
I’ve been on the internet long enough to catch on to the term “Uncanny valley”, and what I witnessed In my first hour gives me that same gut feeling I got when I saw that girl last Wednesday.
I was right to be uncomfortable though, I texted her after class to make sure she was doing alright. But her response only reignited the flames of deep fear burning in my soul.
I’ll copy and paste the messages here:
Me: Hey Is everything good? You seemed off in class today.
Steph SCI 101: Uh yeah, I’m fine. but I was not in class today, I’m severely hungover from Tanner’s party last night.
Me: Haha, good one.
Steph SCI 101: No I’m so Fr, are you okay?
Steph SCI 101: Are you trying to fuck with me or something?
Me: Nevermind, I’m sorry to bother you.
(End Of Texts)
Okay so I’m sure that this gives you all the same feeling of dread that it gave me but I’m sure scaled down a bit. This is where I have started to doubt that it’s a prank, because me and Stephanie are cool. There’s no level of hate for either of us, and even if it was some joke, we don’t know each other on that type of level.
Not only did this seem to happen in my first class, but in between classes while I was walking across campus as well. I walk past hundreds of faces in my many treks across campus, and I swear to you, at least 1/4th of the people I walked past had that same dead stare look. And the way they walked, god I hate even thinking of it. It was like they were an alien trying out their new body suits for the first time. The steps and the bends of their legs just seem so meticulous, dramaticized, and puppeteered.
I’m going to try to investigate further, because at this point my fear for my life is more of a reason to try and figure out what it is so I can try to stop it.
I’m no hero, and I’m sure as hell nothing special, but If I can know what to expect for another encounter, maybe I can avoid meeting the demise I have imagined.
Part 3
I had a strange dream last night, stranger than usual at least. I awoke in the woods, laying face down in the grass with someone looming over me. I heard their footsteps flee rapidly before I flipped over. I found myself just off the trail where the “incident” happened, on the trail laid a girl, bloodied and motionless. When I got up to approach her, she was quickly dragged into the parallel section of the woods. Seeing this I turned and ran into the section of woods I was in. When my legs gave out I found myself near an old supply shed, worn and long abandoned. Searching for cover, I tried the door, which luckily gave after a quick pull. There I found a trapdoor which emanated a blue hue through the cracks. The only thought on my mind, survival brought me to throw it open and climb down. I clattered down the ladder and right before my feet touched the ground, I was pulled backwards by my shirt. That’s where I woke up.
I have always trusted my gut and having a dream that vivid gave me a sense of courage I did not previously have. I know where to start my search now. I have decided my best course of action will be to record my findings on a tape recorder app. After I finish each entry it will be uploaded to a cloud that will ensure if anything happens to me, the story will get out. I am packing my backpack now with a flashlight, glow sticks to mark my trail, and a machete I was gifted by a local in Mexico. All of my recordings will be uploaded below and auto posted after 10 days. Wish me luck everyone, I’m going to need it.
Entry 1: I have started at the only place that makes sense, the trail. It is currently 1:45 PM and I have plenty of sun left in the sky. I just needed to find exactly where to start my journey into the woods. Strangely it was very easy to find. I recall one of the trees having a funky twist near the middle of the trunk. Probably just some two lovebirds trying to carve their name into the tree and realizing there were softer trees to carve into. Anyways hiking further into the woods I believe I can see the shape of the shed through the branches. I wish you guys could see how dense these trees are so you can understand my struggle.
Entry 2: I made it to the shed, but unfortunately the floor in here is concrete. This really sucks for me because I have absolutely no idea where to go from here. It’s identical on the outside but I just don’t understand. Maybe I’m just delusional, which in that case what a waste of time and energy. I’m going to head back home and just start packing for summer. Maybe it’ll be best if I just forget about all of this and leave it behind me. I am graduating after all. Wait hold on what is this?? there’s a button behind one of these shelves. I am going to press it, but idk how it would work because this floor is seamless. I’m just going to leave this recording so if anything does happen I don’t have to worry about holding the phone the whole time. Holy shit, the entire floor is lowering. It’s a fucking elevator.
Entry 3: Okay so I’ve been going down this elevator for like 30 seconds, how far down am I going?.. Oh wait hold on, Im stopped… There’s a metal door with a padlock. Ig since I have the machete there’s only one thing to do, break it. Im going to use the blunt side so I don’t ruin this thing, I like it too much. the lock clatters to the ground after 3 solid hits. Well ig there’s only one way to go now, there’s no button to get back up so I pray there’s another way up. The metal door creaks loudly. Fuck I regret this, It’s dark and I can tell it’s a big area because it’s so echoey in here. I’m currently praising my past self for thinking about the flashlight and glow sticks. I need to find out what in the hell this place is and most importantly, if there’s a damn light switch.
Entry 4: God this place is terrifying I’ve been walking around the sterile white halls of this place for like 10 minutes and have found nothing, no doors, no light switch. I feel like a rat in a maze. Also scratch what I said about being glad I packed glow sticks, because my stupid ass only brought like 20 of these things and I’m already down to 5. Also I feel like I’m not alone, every now and then I’ll turn a corner and the glow from the previous glow stick quickly vanishes. I feel like it might just be because the darkness seems to envelop everything like a blanket. But I have that feeling that I’m being followed. You know the one, where you know somethings wrong you just can’t pin point what it is. Oh shit no way, there’s light, I think there’s a door or something up ahead.
Entry 5: Holy shit… It’s a lab, and worse, there’s people strapped too tables, completely naked and unconscious. I know they are alive because each of them are hooked up with a million different cords, and one of those are plugged into a heart monitor. This place is huge, there has to be at least 50 people on these tables.
“Hey you, you’re not supposed to be in here” yelled a man adorned in a lab coat.
“What are you doing to these kids you sick fucks.” I yelled back at the man across the lab.
In a haste the scientist rushes towards a red button, setting off a loud alarm, turning the lights to a flashing red. With no exit behind me, I could only do one thing... Rush towards him. My training kicked in as I launched into a flurry of calculated strikes. My first hit connected, a right overhand clean under his eye. The doctor stumbled back, but I didn't give him a chance to recover. I pressed the attack, keeping him off balance with a relentless barrage of punches and kicks. He fought back ferociously, but I was one step ahead, anticipating his moves and countering with swift, efficient strikes. We wrestled, the room around us becoming a blur of pain and adrenaline. I used the environment to my advantage, improvising weapons from the scattered medical equipment and turning the empty tables on my opponent. Pinning him to the ground, I laid down a harsh barrage of final blows. His face was a bloody pulp, unrecognizable. But I didn’t walk away unscathed, somewhere in the tussle, the scientist buried a scalpel deep into my stomach. With my adrenaline wearing off, the pain overtook me, sending me into darkness as I fainted from the blood loss and adrenaline dump. I awoke with my arms and legs strapped to the cold metal operating table. Before I could try to struggle, a face overtook my field of vision.
“Quite a fight you put up, you turned poor Dr.Samson into a soup” the looming face said with a chuckle. “You are the first person to put the pieces together and for that I am thoroughly impressed Mr. Hayes”
“Who are you?!” I said fighting at my binds. “Let me go!”
“I’m afraid I can’t do that Mr.Hayes. You have seen far too much, and I definitely can’t have you running around telling the world what you saw here. Although nobody would believe you.” “And to answer your other question, I’m surprised you don’t recognize me… really take a moment and look at me” He said pulling down his face mask.
“Dr.Blackwood?” I said as I looked back on my freshman year biology class.
“Ding ding ding ding. We have a winner!” He said in a maniac joy.
“What are you going to do to me?” I asked.
“Well Mr.Hayes, first I’m going to sew you up from your little tussle you had with my late assistant and then I will put you under and cut into that skull of yours and take out a small piece of what we call in the science world your hippocampus. Then I will draw from that all of the necessary memories to create the perfect clone of you.” He responded.
“Why? Why would you need a clone of any of us. Why can’t you just clone someone willing to be apart of this?” I asked
“Because that’s no fun Mr.Hayes, the hunt excites me. Actually you’re lucky I didn’t get you the first night. Unfortunately my creation had a little bit of a malfunction and formed a wee bit of an attachment to you. I’m sure you remember the ruckus outside your window? Anyways I digress, I do this because everyone of you lowly students will go onto do mediocre jobs where you waste away at a desk. I must also add that with having a clone of you under my control, I can do anything and get away with clean hands. My plan with you originally was to have you go into the admissions office and steal every last cent all for me. On top of that I like the power, because one day I will have a clone of every student on this campus and eventually I will cause a revolt against our comedy of a government. Who will stop me, when I won’t even be on the front lines?” Dr.Blackwood explained.
“I will” I said freeing my last hand from the binds.
What he didn’t realize is that with all of this monologue and the questions I had been feeding him, I was slowly loosening my binds with each wiggle and movement in retaliation.
Lurching forward I grab onto his collar, pulling him into a vicious headbutt. The impact sent Dr. Blackwood reeling backward, his grip on consciousness loosening as he staggered. Seizing the moment, I lunged off the table, adrenaline coursing through my veins despite the searing pain in my abdomen. With a swift motion, I grabbed a nearby surgical instrument, holding it in a defensive stance as I faced my adversary. Dr. Blackwood, recovering from the blow, snarled with rage, his once calm demeanor now replaced by a feral intensity. The room seemed to shrink around us, the tension thickening with each passing second. This was my chance to stop Blackwood's twisted plans. As he lunged forward, I met his attack head-on, the clang of metal reverberating through the room. Blow after blow, we fought with an intensity born of desperation and determination. Despite my injuries, I refused to yield, driven by a fire burnt under me to protect myself and others from Blackwood's actions . In a final, swift move, I delivered a powerful front kick, sending Blackwood crashing to the ground. The room fell silent, the echoes of our struggle fading into the darkness. Coughing he sat in the corner laughing with blood spilling down his face. “You know that it’s too late to save any of these one lying on the tables. I would’ve released you, you know that right? I would’ve simply taken your memory from today out of your brain and leaving you in your bed to wake up thinking you had a fun night” he said with final resolve as he watched me grab the scalpel from the ground taking slow steps near him.
Looking down over him, It was my turn to laugh. Kneeling down to eye level with him I grabbed him by his hair and delivered a final message to him “Fuck you and your little science experiment” as I sliced deep into his throat watching the life fade from his eyes.
I eventually found an exit door, which lead me to a storm drain deep in the woods far from my campus. It took me 2 hours to limp my way onto a main road and flag down a passing car. Pulling over I was rushed to the hospital and later interrogated by some men in suits, my guess is CIA. Here I am now, writing my final entrance. I think I heard them say something about trying a new medical process on me to help me heal quicker
submitted by Krayzfrog to LazyMasquerade [link] [comments]
Hey everyone, I’m typing this on my phone so I apologize if there is weird formatting. Anyways, to get to the point, there’s something really off with some people on my campus. I have come seeking answers.I noticed it first walking home from my 7pm class last Wednesday.
To set the scene, most of the campus is tucked back into the woods a little, and my 7pm class is in the farthest building from the parking lot (further into the woods). I get out from that 7pm class around 9pm, so on cloudy nights like last Wednesday, the only lights on that long sidewalk are the lights radiating from the other buildings. Usually, there’s roughly 30 feet where it’s pitch black because the foliage is pretty dense. I usually walk back to my apartment with some classmates that live in the same complex as me, but I told them to go ahead of me while I finished the rest of the project.
After packing my laptop away, I started heading back home. It was roughly 9:30 at this point, and my brain was slowly shutting down preparing for the deep sleep that has yet to come.Walking down the sidewalk, I heard somebody not too far into the woods laughing like they’ve just heard the funniest joke ever. I immediately thought, “probably some Freshman walking the trails with their friends smoking weed”. Chuckling to myself, I put in my AirPods and picked a playlist for my journey back home.
When I looked up from my phone, there was the silhouette of somebody walking towards me. I have no idea how I missed them before, but honestly, it’s very possible they were just in a spot where the light wasn’t quite reaching them. A little unnerved, I shifted over to the left side of the sidewalk.
(Now I’m usually fine walking alone at night; I’m a 6’2 man who’s dabbled in the world of MMA. But something about this person gave me a primal feeling of unrest.)
When they shifted over to the left mirroring me, I felt my blood run cold. But alas, I had to keep walking because this was my only way back home. As I neared closer to the figure, I almost laughed at myself when I realized it was just some harmless girl walking towards the Murphy building. If anything, I’m the intimidating one to her.
This is where it really gets weird. She stopped as I was passing her and turned to me. Thinking she needed to ask me something, I took an AirPod out and asked “what’s up?”. After staring at me for an uncomfortable amount of time, she opened her mouth, and I kid you not, mimicked the laugh I heard moments before perfectly. Before I could chalk it up to it just being her in the trails earlier, I noticed something. Her mouth wasn’t moving at all. If I had left my AirPods in, it would just look like she was just opening her mouth and staring at me. She then shifted into a deep raspy laugh. She did all of this without moving her mouth at all; I couldn’t even see her throat moving as you would expect if someone was laughing. It was almost like she was some fucked up human-shaped gramophone. The feeling of absolute horror that came over me is something I’ve only experienced in my imagination. Before I could think to do anything next, My body began to run off some sort of primal instinct. With my legs burning, it took me about 10 minutes to get all the way back to my apartment and lock myself in relative safety.
I’m coming on here now to ask if anybody knows what I experienced? I have been hearing that same laughter outside my window every night since that night, I am too terrified to sleep well and have refused to go to any of my classes. Please I just want answers, I don’t want to keep living in fear.
Part 2:
Hey everyone, I’ve gotten some DMs telling me what it may be. I’ve heard everything from banshee to skinwalker. After further research I pray to god it was neither of them. I’m praying it was just some girl with a speaker playing some sort of cruel joke. I mean yes there are people who don’t like me on campus, I’ve made some enemies over the past 4 years. But, I just don’t understand what could’ve brought it to this point. I had to stop hiding in fear and go to my classes before my grades plummet, I’m almost done with my degree and only have a few more weeks. If I let some sort of stupid prank ruin my career, It would be everything I swore against to my parents.
A lot of you guys in the DMs were also asking what college I go to and what my name is. First I want to say sorry for not providing that information in the first post, I’m sure you can understand where my head was at typing that. So let me introduce myself, my name is Nick and In order to keep my privacy, I will only provide that I go to a midwest university.
I’m sure you may be wondering, “so did it just stop?”. I would love to say yes, but really things have just gotten weirder. Though, I am pleased to say that there is no longer laughing out my window every night.
Ever since that night, I’ve been noticing more things off with the people on campus. Now you may just think it’s paranoia, but just be patient and listen.
Yesterday, I decided to muster up all of my courage and go to class. Luckily my first class is at 10AM, when the sun is well in the sky, so walking across campus seemed much less threatening. When I sat down in my first class, I noticed something off with the girl that sits in front of me. Usually she’s chatty and excited to be in class, but today she just stared blankly ahead. I tried to say good morning and ask about her weekend, as we do every Monday, but she continued to have that blank stare. She did turn her head towards be, but her eyes read “lights on, but nobody is home”.
Thinking to myself, she may just be hungover, or going through the bout of college student depression. I decided to shrug it off and turn to the front of the class and get my notes ready. But the moment I turned around, I could feel it. Her eyes burrowing deep into the back of my head. When I flipped around to see if I was just being irrational, I quickly learned I wasn’t. Her eyes went from the blank glare, to the most enthusiastic face I’ve seen on her. It was horrible, it almost seemed like she was trying so hard to pretend she was thrilled to be in class and to speak to me. It was inhuman.
I’ve been on the internet long enough to catch on to the term “Uncanny valley”, and what I witnessed In my first hour gives me that same gut feeling I got when I saw that girl last Wednesday.
I was right to be uncomfortable though, I texted her after class to make sure she was doing alright. But her response only reignited the flames of deep fear burning in my soul.
I’ll copy and paste the messages here:
Me: Hey Is everything good? You seemed off in class today.
Steph SCI 101: Uh yeah, I’m fine. but I was not in class today, I’m severely hungover from Tanner’s party last night.
Me: Haha, good one.
Steph SCI 101: No I’m so Fr, are you okay?
Steph SCI 101: Are you trying to fuck with me or something?
Me: Nevermind, I’m sorry to bother you.
(End Of Texts)
Okay so I’m sure that this gives you all the same feeling of dread that it gave me but I’m sure scaled down a bit. This is where I have started to doubt that it’s a prank, because me and Stephanie are cool. There’s no level of hate for either of us, and even if it was some joke, we don’t know each other on that type of level.
Not only did this seem to happen in my first class, but in between classes while I was walking across campus as well. I walk past hundreds of faces in my many treks across campus, and I swear to you, at least 1/4th of the people I walked past had that same dead stare look. And the way they walked, god I hate even thinking of it. It was like they were an alien trying out their new body suits for the first time. The steps and the bends of their legs just seem so meticulous, dramaticized, and puppeteered.
I’m going to try to investigate further, because at this point my fear for my life is more of a reason to try and figure out what it is so I can try to stop it.
I’m no hero, and I’m sure as hell nothing special, but If I can know what to expect for another encounter, maybe I can avoid meeting the demise I have imagined.
Part 3
First off I would like to apologize for my 20-day hiatus. For those who were worried that curiosity killed the cat so to speak, I appreciate your concern. On top of my investigation, I have also had to go through finals and work for a boss who didn't believe in life outside of work. So let's start where we left off. I had a feeling that this task was left for me to solve. it may sound stupid, but let me explain why. That night, after my last post, I had a dream that further solidified my need to solve the mystery. I tried to write all that I remembered down the morning after so here is what I wrote.April 4th, 2024
I had a strange dream last night, stranger than usual at least. I awoke in the woods, laying face down in the grass with someone looming over me. I heard their footsteps flee rapidly before I flipped over. I found myself just off the trail where the “incident” happened, on the trail laid a girl, bloodied and motionless. When I got up to approach her, she was quickly dragged into the parallel section of the woods. Seeing this I turned and ran into the section of woods I was in. When my legs gave out I found myself near an old supply shed, worn and long abandoned. Searching for cover, I tried the door, which luckily gave after a quick pull. There I found a trapdoor which emanated a blue hue through the cracks. The only thought on my mind, survival brought me to throw it open and climb down. I clattered down the ladder and right before my feet touched the ground, I was pulled backwards by my shirt. That’s where I woke up.
I have always trusted my gut and having a dream that vivid gave me a sense of courage I did not previously have. I know where to start my search now. I have decided my best course of action will be to record my findings on a tape recorder app. After I finish each entry it will be uploaded to a cloud that will ensure if anything happens to me, the story will get out. I am packing my backpack now with a flashlight, glow sticks to mark my trail, and a machete I was gifted by a local in Mexico. All of my recordings will be uploaded below and auto posted after 10 days. Wish me luck everyone, I’m going to need it.
Entry 1: I have started at the only place that makes sense, the trail. It is currently 1:45 PM and I have plenty of sun left in the sky. I just needed to find exactly where to start my journey into the woods. Strangely it was very easy to find. I recall one of the trees having a funky twist near the middle of the trunk. Probably just some two lovebirds trying to carve their name into the tree and realizing there were softer trees to carve into. Anyways hiking further into the woods I believe I can see the shape of the shed through the branches. I wish you guys could see how dense these trees are so you can understand my struggle.
Entry 2: I made it to the shed, but unfortunately the floor in here is concrete. This really sucks for me because I have absolutely no idea where to go from here. It’s identical on the outside but I just don’t understand. Maybe I’m just delusional, which in that case what a waste of time and energy. I’m going to head back home and just start packing for summer. Maybe it’ll be best if I just forget about all of this and leave it behind me. I am graduating after all. Wait hold on what is this?? there’s a button behind one of these shelves. I am going to press it, but idk how it would work because this floor is seamless. I’m just going to leave this recording so if anything does happen I don’t have to worry about holding the phone the whole time. Holy shit, the entire floor is lowering. It’s a fucking elevator.
Entry 3: Okay so I’ve been going down this elevator for like 30 seconds, how far down am I going?.. Oh wait hold on, Im stopped… There’s a metal door with a padlock. Ig since I have the machete there’s only one thing to do, break it. Im going to use the blunt side so I don’t ruin this thing, I like it too much. the lock clatters to the ground after 3 solid hits. Well ig there’s only one way to go now, there’s no button to get back up so I pray there’s another way up. The metal door creaks loudly. Fuck I regret this, It’s dark and I can tell it’s a big area because it’s so echoey in here. I’m currently praising my past self for thinking about the flashlight and glow sticks. I need to find out what in the hell this place is and most importantly, if there’s a damn light switch.
Entry 4: God this place is terrifying I’ve been walking around the sterile white halls of this place for like 10 minutes and have found nothing, no doors, no light switch. I feel like a rat in a maze. Also scratch what I said about being glad I packed glow sticks, because my stupid ass only brought like 20 of these things and I’m already down to 5. Also I feel like I’m not alone, every now and then I’ll turn a corner and the glow from the previous glow stick quickly vanishes. I feel like it might just be because the darkness seems to envelop everything like a blanket. But I have that feeling that I’m being followed. You know the one, where you know somethings wrong you just can’t pin point what it is. Oh shit no way, there’s light, I think there’s a door or something up ahead.
Entry 5: Holy shit… It’s a lab, and worse, there’s people strapped too tables, completely naked and unconscious. I know they are alive because each of them are hooked up with a million different cords, and one of those are plugged into a heart monitor. This place is huge, there has to be at least 50 people on these tables.
“Hey you, you’re not supposed to be in here” yelled a man adorned in a lab coat.
“What are you doing to these kids you sick fucks.” I yelled back at the man across the lab.
In a haste the scientist rushes towards a red button, setting off a loud alarm, turning the lights to a flashing red. With no exit behind me, I could only do one thing... Rush towards him. My training kicked in as I launched into a flurry of calculated strikes. My first hit connected, a right overhand clean under his eye. The doctor stumbled back, but I didn't give him a chance to recover. I pressed the attack, keeping him off balance with a relentless barrage of punches and kicks. He fought back ferociously, but I was one step ahead, anticipating his moves and countering with swift, efficient strikes. We wrestled, the room around us becoming a blur of pain and adrenaline. I used the environment to my advantage, improvising weapons from the scattered medical equipment and turning the empty tables on my opponent. Pinning him to the ground, I laid down a harsh barrage of final blows. His face was a bloody pulp, unrecognizable. But I didn’t walk away unscathed, somewhere in the tussle, the scientist buried a scalpel deep into my stomach. With my adrenaline wearing off, the pain overtook me, sending me into darkness as I fainted from the blood loss and adrenaline dump. I awoke with my arms and legs strapped to the cold metal operating table. Before I could try to struggle, a face overtook my field of vision.
“Quite a fight you put up, you turned poor Dr.Samson into a soup” the looming face said with a chuckle. “You are the first person to put the pieces together and for that I am thoroughly impressed Mr. Hayes”
“Who are you?!” I said fighting at my binds. “Let me go!”
“I’m afraid I can’t do that Mr.Hayes. You have seen far too much, and I definitely can’t have you running around telling the world what you saw here. Although nobody would believe you.” “And to answer your other question, I’m surprised you don’t recognize me… really take a moment and look at me” He said pulling down his face mask.
“Dr.Blackwood?” I said as I looked back on my freshman year biology class.
“Ding ding ding ding. We have a winner!” He said in a maniac joy.
“What are you going to do to me?” I asked.
“Well Mr.Hayes, first I’m going to sew you up from your little tussle you had with my late assistant and then I will put you under and cut into that skull of yours and take out a small piece of what we call in the science world your hippocampus. Then I will draw from that all of the necessary memories to create the perfect clone of you.” He responded.
“Why? Why would you need a clone of any of us. Why can’t you just clone someone willing to be apart of this?” I asked
“Because that’s no fun Mr.Hayes, the hunt excites me. Actually you’re lucky I didn’t get you the first night. Unfortunately my creation had a little bit of a malfunction and formed a wee bit of an attachment to you. I’m sure you remember the ruckus outside your window? Anyways I digress, I do this because everyone of you lowly students will go onto do mediocre jobs where you waste away at a desk. I must also add that with having a clone of you under my control, I can do anything and get away with clean hands. My plan with you originally was to have you go into the admissions office and steal every last cent all for me. On top of that I like the power, because one day I will have a clone of every student on this campus and eventually I will cause a revolt against our comedy of a government. Who will stop me, when I won’t even be on the front lines?” Dr.Blackwood explained.
“I will” I said freeing my last hand from the binds.
What he didn’t realize is that with all of this monologue and the questions I had been feeding him, I was slowly loosening my binds with each wiggle and movement in retaliation.
Lurching forward I grab onto his collar, pulling him into a vicious headbutt. The impact sent Dr. Blackwood reeling backward, his grip on consciousness loosening as he staggered. Seizing the moment, I lunged off the table, adrenaline coursing through my veins despite the searing pain in my abdomen. With a swift motion, I grabbed a nearby surgical instrument, holding it in a defensive stance as I faced my adversary. Dr. Blackwood, recovering from the blow, snarled with rage, his once calm demeanor now replaced by a feral intensity. The room seemed to shrink around us, the tension thickening with each passing second. This was my chance to stop Blackwood's twisted plans. As he lunged forward, I met his attack head-on, the clang of metal reverberating through the room. Blow after blow, we fought with an intensity born of desperation and determination. Despite my injuries, I refused to yield, driven by a fire burnt under me to protect myself and others from Blackwood's actions . In a final, swift move, I delivered a powerful front kick, sending Blackwood crashing to the ground. The room fell silent, the echoes of our struggle fading into the darkness. Coughing he sat in the corner laughing with blood spilling down his face. “You know that it’s too late to save any of these one lying on the tables. I would’ve released you, you know that right? I would’ve simply taken your memory from today out of your brain and leaving you in your bed to wake up thinking you had a fun night” he said with final resolve as he watched me grab the scalpel from the ground taking slow steps near him.
Looking down over him, It was my turn to laugh. Kneeling down to eye level with him I grabbed him by his hair and delivered a final message to him “Fuck you and your little science experiment” as I sliced deep into his throat watching the life fade from his eyes.
I eventually found an exit door, which lead me to a storm drain deep in the woods far from my campus. It took me 2 hours to limp my way onto a main road and flag down a passing car. Pulling over I was rushed to the hospital and later interrogated by some men in suits, my guess is CIA. Here I am now, writing my final entrance. I think I heard them say something about trying a new medical process on me to help me heal quicker
2024.05.16 06:53 Krayzfrog There’s something off with the people on campus (full story)
I think there’s something off about my campus
Hey everyone, I’m typing this on my phone so I apologize if there is weird formatting. Anyways, to get to the point, there’s something really off with some people on my campus. I have come seeking answers.I noticed it first walking home from my 7pm class last Wednesday.
To set the scene, most of the campus is tucked back into the woods a little, and my 7pm class is in the farthest building from the parking lot (further into the woods). I get out from that 7pm class around 9pm, so on cloudy nights like last Wednesday, the only lights on that long sidewalk are the lights radiating from the other buildings. Usually, there’s roughly 30 feet where it’s pitch black because the foliage is pretty dense. I usually walk back to my apartment with some classmates that live in the same complex as me, but I told them to go ahead of me while I finished the rest of the project.
After packing my laptop away, I started heading back home. It was roughly 9:30 at this point, and my brain was slowly shutting down preparing for the deep sleep that has yet to come.Walking down the sidewalk, I heard somebody not too far into the woods laughing like they’ve just heard the funniest joke ever. I immediately thought, “probably some Freshman walking the trails with their friends smoking weed”. Chuckling to myself, I put in my AirPods and picked a playlist for my journey back home.
When I looked up from my phone, there was the silhouette of somebody walking towards me. I have no idea how I missed them before, but honestly, it’s very possible they were just in a spot where the light wasn’t quite reaching them. A little unnerved, I shifted over to the left side of the sidewalk.
(Now I’m usually fine walking alone at night; I’m a 6’2 man who’s dabbled in the world of MMA. But something about this person gave me a primal feeling of unrest.)
When they shifted over to the left mirroring me, I felt my blood run cold. But alas, I had to keep walking because this was my only way back home. As I neared closer to the figure, I almost laughed at myself when I realized it was just some harmless girl walking towards the Murphy building. If anything, I’m the intimidating one to her.
This is where it really gets weird. She stopped as I was passing her and turned to me. Thinking she needed to ask me something, I took an AirPod out and asked “what’s up?”. After staring at me for an uncomfortable amount of time, she opened her mouth, and I kid you not, mimicked the laugh I heard moments before perfectly. Before I could chalk it up to it just being her in the trails earlier, I noticed something. Her mouth wasn’t moving at all. If I had left my AirPods in, it would just look like she was just opening her mouth and staring at me. She then shifted into a deep raspy laugh. She did all of this without moving her mouth at all; I couldn’t even see her throat moving as you would expect if someone was laughing. It was almost like she was some fucked up human-shaped gramophone. The feeling of absolute horror that came over me is something I’ve only experienced in my imagination. Before I could think to do anything next, My body began to run off some sort of primal instinct. With my legs burning, it took me about 10 minutes to get all the way back to my apartment and lock myself in relative safety.
I’m coming on here now to ask if anybody knows what I experienced? I have been hearing that same laughter outside my window every night since that night, I am too terrified to sleep well and have refused to go to any of my classes. Please I just want answers, I don’t want to keep living in fear.
Part 2:
Hey everyone, I’ve gotten some DMs telling me what it may be. I’ve heard everything from banshee to skinwalker. After further research I pray to god it was neither of them. I’m praying it was just some girl with a speaker playing some sort of cruel joke. I mean yes there are people who don’t like me on campus, I’ve made some enemies over the past 4 years. But, I just don’t understand what could’ve brought it to this point. I had to stop hiding in fear and go to my classes before my grades plummet, I’m almost done with my degree and only have a few more weeks. If I let some sort of stupid prank ruin my career, It would be everything I swore against to my parents.
A lot of you guys in the DMs were also asking what college I go to and what my name is. First I want to say sorry for not providing that information in the first post, I’m sure you can understand where my head was at typing that. So let me introduce myself, my name is Nick and In order to keep my privacy, I will only provide that I go to a midwest university.
I’m sure you may be wondering, “so did it just stop?”. I would love to say yes, but really things have just gotten weirder. Though, I am pleased to say that there is no longer laughing out my window every night.
Ever since that night, I’ve been noticing more things off with the people on campus. Now you may just think it’s paranoia, but just be patient and listen.
Yesterday, I decided to muster up all of my courage and go to class. Luckily my first class is at 10AM, when the sun is well in the sky, so walking across campus seemed much less threatening. When I sat down in my first class, I noticed something off with the girl that sits in front of me. Usually she’s chatty and excited to be in class, but today she just stared blankly ahead. I tried to say good morning and ask about her weekend, as we do every Monday, but she continued to have that blank stare. She did turn her head towards be, but her eyes read “lights on, but nobody is home”.
Thinking to myself, she may just be hungover, or going through the bout of college student depression. I decided to shrug it off and turn to the front of the class and get my notes ready. But the moment I turned around, I could feel it. Her eyes burrowing deep into the back of my head. When I flipped around to see if I was just being irrational, I quickly learned I wasn’t. Her eyes went from the blank glare, to the most enthusiastic face I’ve seen on her. It was horrible, it almost seemed like she was trying so hard to pretend she was thrilled to be in class and to speak to me. It was inhuman.
I’ve been on the internet long enough to catch on to the term “Uncanny valley”, and what I witnessed In my first hour gives me that same gut feeling I got when I saw that girl last Wednesday.
I was right to be uncomfortable though, I texted her after class to make sure she was doing alright. But her response only reignited the flames of deep fear burning in my soul.
I’ll copy and paste the messages here:
Me: Hey Is everything good? You seemed off in class today.
Steph SCI 101: Uh yeah, I’m fine. but I was not in class today, I’m severely hungover from Tanner’s party last night.
Me: Haha, good one.
Steph SCI 101: No I’m so Fr, are you okay?
Steph SCI 101: Are you trying to fuck with me or something?
Me: Nevermind, I’m sorry to bother you.
(End Of Texts)
Okay so I’m sure that this gives you all the same feeling of dread that it gave me but I’m sure scaled down a bit. This is where I have started to doubt that it’s a prank, because me and Stephanie are cool. There’s no level of hate for either of us, and even if it was some joke, we don’t know each other on that type of level.
Not only did this seem to happen in my first class, but in between classes while I was walking across campus as well. I walk past hundreds of faces in my many treks across campus, and I swear to you, at least 1/4th of the people I walked past had that same dead stare look. And the way they walked, god I hate even thinking of it. It was like they were an alien trying out their new body suits for the first time. The steps and the bends of their legs just seem so meticulous, dramaticized, and puppeteered.
I’m going to try to investigate further, because at this point my fear for my life is more of a reason to try and figure out what it is so I can try to stop it.
I’m no hero, and I’m sure as hell nothing special, but If I can know what to expect for another encounter, maybe I can avoid meeting the demise I have imagined.
Part 3
I had a strange dream last night, stranger than usual at least. I awoke in the woods, laying face down in the grass with someone looming over me. I heard their footsteps flee rapidly before I flipped over. I found myself just off the trail where the “incident” happened, on the trail laid a girl, bloodied and motionless. When I got up to approach her, she was quickly dragged into the parallel section of the woods. Seeing this I turned and ran into the section of woods I was in. When my legs gave out I found myself near an old supply shed, worn and long abandoned. Searching for cover, I tried the door, which luckily gave after a quick pull. There I found a trapdoor which emanated a blue hue through the cracks. The only thought on my mind, survival brought me to throw it open and climb down. I clattered down the ladder and right before my feet touched the ground, I was pulled backwards by my shirt. That’s where I woke up.
I have always trusted my gut and having a dream that vivid gave me a sense of courage I did not previously have. I know where to start my search now. I have decided my best course of action will be to record my findings on a tape recorder app. After I finish each entry it will be uploaded to a cloud that will ensure if anything happens to me, the story will get out. I am packing my backpack now with a flashlight, glow sticks to mark my trail, and a machete I was gifted by a local in Mexico. All of my recordings will be uploaded below and auto posted after 10 days. Wish me luck everyone, I’m going to need it.
Entry 1: I have started at the only place that makes sense, the trail. It is currently 1:45 PM and I have plenty of sun left in the sky. I just needed to find exactly where to start my journey into the woods. Strangely it was very easy to find. I recall one of the trees having a funky twist near the middle of the trunk. Probably just some two lovebirds trying to carve their name into the tree and realizing there were softer trees to carve into. Anyways hiking further into the woods I believe I can see the shape of the shed through the branches. I wish you guys could see how dense these trees are so you can understand my struggle.
Entry 2: I made it to the shed, but unfortunately the floor in here is concrete. This really sucks for me because I have absolutely no idea where to go from here. It’s identical on the outside but I just don’t understand. Maybe I’m just delusional, which in that case what a waste of time and energy. I’m going to head back home and just start packing for summer. Maybe it’ll be best if I just forget about all of this and leave it behind me. I am graduating after all. Wait hold on what is this?? there’s a button behind one of these shelves. I am going to press it, but idk how it would work because this floor is seamless. I’m just going to leave this recording so if anything does happen I don’t have to worry about holding the phone the whole time. Holy shit, the entire floor is lowering. It’s a fucking elevator.
Entry 3: Okay so I’ve been going down this elevator for like 30 seconds, how far down am I going?.. Oh wait hold on, Im stopped… There’s a metal door with a padlock. Ig since I have the machete there’s only one thing to do, break it. Im going to use the blunt side so I don’t ruin this thing, I like it too much. the lock clatters to the ground after 3 solid hits. Well ig there’s only one way to go now, there’s no button to get back up so I pray there’s another way up. The metal door creaks loudly. Fuck I regret this, It’s dark and I can tell it’s a big area because it’s so echoey in here. I’m currently praising my past self for thinking about the flashlight and glow sticks. I need to find out what in the hell this place is and most importantly, if there’s a damn light switch.
Entry 4: God this place is terrifying I’ve been walking around the sterile white halls of this place for like 10 minutes and have found nothing, no doors, no light switch. I feel like a rat in a maze. Also scratch what I said about being glad I packed glow sticks, because my stupid ass only brought like 20 of these things and I’m already down to 5. Also I feel like I’m not alone, every now and then I’ll turn a corner and the glow from the previous glow stick quickly vanishes. I feel like it might just be because the darkness seems to envelop everything like a blanket. But I have that feeling that I’m being followed. You know the one, where you know somethings wrong you just can’t pin point what it is. Oh shit no way, there’s light, I think there’s a door or something up ahead.
Entry 5: Holy shit… It’s a lab, and worse, there’s people strapped too tables, completely naked and unconscious. I know they are alive because each of them are hooked up with a million different cords, and one of those are plugged into a heart monitor. This place is huge, there has to be at least 50 people on these tables.
“Hey you, you’re not supposed to be in here” yelled a man adorned in a lab coat.
“What are you doing to these kids you sick fucks.” I yelled back at the man across the lab.
In a haste the scientist rushes towards a red button, setting off a loud alarm, turning the lights to a flashing red. With no exit behind me, I could only do one thing... Rush towards him. My training kicked in as I launched into a flurry of calculated strikes. My first hit connected, a right overhand clean under his eye. The doctor stumbled back, but I didn't give him a chance to recover. I pressed the attack, keeping him off balance with a relentless barrage of punches and kicks. He fought back ferociously, but I was one step ahead, anticipating his moves and countering with swift, efficient strikes. We wrestled, the room around us becoming a blur of pain and adrenaline. I used the environment to my advantage, improvising weapons from the scattered medical equipment and turning the empty tables on my opponent. Pinning him to the ground, I laid down a harsh barrage of final blows. His face was a bloody pulp, unrecognizable. But I didn’t walk away unscathed, somewhere in the tussle, the scientist buried a scalpel deep into my stomach. With my adrenaline wearing off, the pain overtook me, sending me into darkness as I fainted from the blood loss and adrenaline dump. I awoke with my arms and legs strapped to the cold metal operating table. Before I could try to struggle, a face overtook my field of vision.
“Quite a fight you put up, you turned poor Dr.Samson into a soup” the looming face said with a chuckle. “You are the first person to put the pieces together and for that I am thoroughly impressed Mr. Hayes”
“Who are you?!” I said fighting at my binds. “Let me go!”
“I’m afraid I can’t do that Mr.Hayes. You have seen far too much, and I definitely can’t have you running around telling the world what you saw here. Although nobody would believe you.” “And to answer your other question, I’m surprised you don’t recognize me… really take a moment and look at me” He said pulling down his face mask.
“Dr.Blackwood?” I said as I looked back on my freshman year biology class.
“Ding ding ding ding. We have a winner!” He said in a maniac joy.
“What are you going to do to me?” I asked.
“Well Mr.Hayes, first I’m going to sew you up from your little tussle you had with my late assistant and then I will put you under and cut into that skull of yours and take out a small piece of what we call in the science world your hippocampus. Then I will draw from that all of the necessary memories to create the perfect clone of you.” He responded.
“Why? Why would you need a clone of any of us. Why can’t you just clone someone willing to be apart of this?” I asked
“Because that’s no fun Mr.Hayes, the hunt excites me. Actually you’re lucky I didn’t get you the first night. Unfortunately my creation had a little bit of a malfunction and formed a wee bit of an attachment to you. I’m sure you remember the ruckus outside your window? Anyways I digress, I do this because everyone of you lowly students will go onto do mediocre jobs where you waste away at a desk. I must also add that with having a clone of you under my control, I can do anything and get away with clean hands. My plan with you originally was to have you go into the admissions office and steal every last cent all for me. On top of that I like the power, because one day I will have a clone of every student on this campus and eventually I will cause a revolt against our comedy of a government. Who will stop me, when I won’t even be on the front lines?” Dr.Blackwood explained.
“I will” I said freeing my last hand from the binds.
What he didn’t realize is that with all of this monologue and the questions I had been feeding him, I was slowly loosening my binds with each wiggle and movement in retaliation.
Lurching forward I grab onto his collar, pulling him into a vicious headbutt. The impact sent Dr. Blackwood reeling backward, his grip on consciousness loosening as he staggered. Seizing the moment, I lunged off the table, adrenaline coursing through my veins despite the searing pain in my abdomen. With a swift motion, I grabbed a nearby surgical instrument, holding it in a defensive stance as I faced my adversary. Dr. Blackwood, recovering from the blow, snarled with rage, his once calm demeanor now replaced by a feral intensity. The room seemed to shrink around us, the tension thickening with each passing second. This was my chance to stop Blackwood's twisted plans. As he lunged forward, I met his attack head-on, the clang of metal reverberating through the room. Blow after blow, we fought with an intensity born of desperation and determination. Despite my injuries, I refused to yield, driven by a fire burnt under me to protect myself and others from Blackwood's actions . In a final, swift move, I delivered a powerful front kick, sending Blackwood crashing to the ground. The room fell silent, the echoes of our struggle fading into the darkness. Coughing he sat in the corner laughing with blood spilling down his face. “You know that it’s too late to save any of these one lying on the tables. I would’ve released you, you know that right? I would’ve simply taken your memory from today out of your brain and leaving you in your bed to wake up thinking you had a fun night” he said with final resolve as he watched me grab the scalpel from the ground taking slow steps near him.
Looking down over him, It was my turn to laugh. Kneeling down to eye level with him I grabbed him by his hair and delivered a final message to him “Fuck you and your little science experiment” as I sliced deep into his throat watching the life fade from his eyes.
I eventually found an exit door, which lead me to a storm drain deep in the woods far from my campus. It took me 2 hours to limp my way onto a main road and flag down a passing car. Pulling over I was rushed to the hospital and later interrogated by some men in suits, my guess is CIA. Here I am now, writing my final entrance. I think I heard them say something about trying a new medical process on me to help me heal quicker
submitted by Krayzfrog to BeingScaredStories [link] [comments]
Hey everyone, I’m typing this on my phone so I apologize if there is weird formatting. Anyways, to get to the point, there’s something really off with some people on my campus. I have come seeking answers.I noticed it first walking home from my 7pm class last Wednesday.
To set the scene, most of the campus is tucked back into the woods a little, and my 7pm class is in the farthest building from the parking lot (further into the woods). I get out from that 7pm class around 9pm, so on cloudy nights like last Wednesday, the only lights on that long sidewalk are the lights radiating from the other buildings. Usually, there’s roughly 30 feet where it’s pitch black because the foliage is pretty dense. I usually walk back to my apartment with some classmates that live in the same complex as me, but I told them to go ahead of me while I finished the rest of the project.
After packing my laptop away, I started heading back home. It was roughly 9:30 at this point, and my brain was slowly shutting down preparing for the deep sleep that has yet to come.Walking down the sidewalk, I heard somebody not too far into the woods laughing like they’ve just heard the funniest joke ever. I immediately thought, “probably some Freshman walking the trails with their friends smoking weed”. Chuckling to myself, I put in my AirPods and picked a playlist for my journey back home.
When I looked up from my phone, there was the silhouette of somebody walking towards me. I have no idea how I missed them before, but honestly, it’s very possible they were just in a spot where the light wasn’t quite reaching them. A little unnerved, I shifted over to the left side of the sidewalk.
(Now I’m usually fine walking alone at night; I’m a 6’2 man who’s dabbled in the world of MMA. But something about this person gave me a primal feeling of unrest.)
When they shifted over to the left mirroring me, I felt my blood run cold. But alas, I had to keep walking because this was my only way back home. As I neared closer to the figure, I almost laughed at myself when I realized it was just some harmless girl walking towards the Murphy building. If anything, I’m the intimidating one to her.
This is where it really gets weird. She stopped as I was passing her and turned to me. Thinking she needed to ask me something, I took an AirPod out and asked “what’s up?”. After staring at me for an uncomfortable amount of time, she opened her mouth, and I kid you not, mimicked the laugh I heard moments before perfectly. Before I could chalk it up to it just being her in the trails earlier, I noticed something. Her mouth wasn’t moving at all. If I had left my AirPods in, it would just look like she was just opening her mouth and staring at me. She then shifted into a deep raspy laugh. She did all of this without moving her mouth at all; I couldn’t even see her throat moving as you would expect if someone was laughing. It was almost like she was some fucked up human-shaped gramophone. The feeling of absolute horror that came over me is something I’ve only experienced in my imagination. Before I could think to do anything next, My body began to run off some sort of primal instinct. With my legs burning, it took me about 10 minutes to get all the way back to my apartment and lock myself in relative safety.
I’m coming on here now to ask if anybody knows what I experienced? I have been hearing that same laughter outside my window every night since that night, I am too terrified to sleep well and have refused to go to any of my classes. Please I just want answers, I don’t want to keep living in fear.
Part 2:
Hey everyone, I’ve gotten some DMs telling me what it may be. I’ve heard everything from banshee to skinwalker. After further research I pray to god it was neither of them. I’m praying it was just some girl with a speaker playing some sort of cruel joke. I mean yes there are people who don’t like me on campus, I’ve made some enemies over the past 4 years. But, I just don’t understand what could’ve brought it to this point. I had to stop hiding in fear and go to my classes before my grades plummet, I’m almost done with my degree and only have a few more weeks. If I let some sort of stupid prank ruin my career, It would be everything I swore against to my parents.
A lot of you guys in the DMs were also asking what college I go to and what my name is. First I want to say sorry for not providing that information in the first post, I’m sure you can understand where my head was at typing that. So let me introduce myself, my name is Nick and In order to keep my privacy, I will only provide that I go to a midwest university.
I’m sure you may be wondering, “so did it just stop?”. I would love to say yes, but really things have just gotten weirder. Though, I am pleased to say that there is no longer laughing out my window every night.
Ever since that night, I’ve been noticing more things off with the people on campus. Now you may just think it’s paranoia, but just be patient and listen.
Yesterday, I decided to muster up all of my courage and go to class. Luckily my first class is at 10AM, when the sun is well in the sky, so walking across campus seemed much less threatening. When I sat down in my first class, I noticed something off with the girl that sits in front of me. Usually she’s chatty and excited to be in class, but today she just stared blankly ahead. I tried to say good morning and ask about her weekend, as we do every Monday, but she continued to have that blank stare. She did turn her head towards be, but her eyes read “lights on, but nobody is home”.
Thinking to myself, she may just be hungover, or going through the bout of college student depression. I decided to shrug it off and turn to the front of the class and get my notes ready. But the moment I turned around, I could feel it. Her eyes burrowing deep into the back of my head. When I flipped around to see if I was just being irrational, I quickly learned I wasn’t. Her eyes went from the blank glare, to the most enthusiastic face I’ve seen on her. It was horrible, it almost seemed like she was trying so hard to pretend she was thrilled to be in class and to speak to me. It was inhuman.
I’ve been on the internet long enough to catch on to the term “Uncanny valley”, and what I witnessed In my first hour gives me that same gut feeling I got when I saw that girl last Wednesday.
I was right to be uncomfortable though, I texted her after class to make sure she was doing alright. But her response only reignited the flames of deep fear burning in my soul.
I’ll copy and paste the messages here:
Me: Hey Is everything good? You seemed off in class today.
Steph SCI 101: Uh yeah, I’m fine. but I was not in class today, I’m severely hungover from Tanner’s party last night.
Me: Haha, good one.
Steph SCI 101: No I’m so Fr, are you okay?
Steph SCI 101: Are you trying to fuck with me or something?
Me: Nevermind, I’m sorry to bother you.
(End Of Texts)
Okay so I’m sure that this gives you all the same feeling of dread that it gave me but I’m sure scaled down a bit. This is where I have started to doubt that it’s a prank, because me and Stephanie are cool. There’s no level of hate for either of us, and even if it was some joke, we don’t know each other on that type of level.
Not only did this seem to happen in my first class, but in between classes while I was walking across campus as well. I walk past hundreds of faces in my many treks across campus, and I swear to you, at least 1/4th of the people I walked past had that same dead stare look. And the way they walked, god I hate even thinking of it. It was like they were an alien trying out their new body suits for the first time. The steps and the bends of their legs just seem so meticulous, dramaticized, and puppeteered.
I’m going to try to investigate further, because at this point my fear for my life is more of a reason to try and figure out what it is so I can try to stop it.
I’m no hero, and I’m sure as hell nothing special, but If I can know what to expect for another encounter, maybe I can avoid meeting the demise I have imagined.
Part 3
First off I would like to apologize for my 20-day hiatus. For those who were worried that curiosity killed the cat so to speak, I appreciate your concern. On top of my investigation, I have also had to go through finals and work for a boss who didn't believe in life outside of work. So let's start where we left off. I had a feeling that this task was left for me to solve. it may sound stupid, but let me explain why. That night, after my last post, I had a dream that further solidified my need to solve the mystery. I tried to write all that I remembered down the morning after so here is what I wrote.April 4th, 2024
I had a strange dream last night, stranger than usual at least. I awoke in the woods, laying face down in the grass with someone looming over me. I heard their footsteps flee rapidly before I flipped over. I found myself just off the trail where the “incident” happened, on the trail laid a girl, bloodied and motionless. When I got up to approach her, she was quickly dragged into the parallel section of the woods. Seeing this I turned and ran into the section of woods I was in. When my legs gave out I found myself near an old supply shed, worn and long abandoned. Searching for cover, I tried the door, which luckily gave after a quick pull. There I found a trapdoor which emanated a blue hue through the cracks. The only thought on my mind, survival brought me to throw it open and climb down. I clattered down the ladder and right before my feet touched the ground, I was pulled backwards by my shirt. That’s where I woke up.
I have always trusted my gut and having a dream that vivid gave me a sense of courage I did not previously have. I know where to start my search now. I have decided my best course of action will be to record my findings on a tape recorder app. After I finish each entry it will be uploaded to a cloud that will ensure if anything happens to me, the story will get out. I am packing my backpack now with a flashlight, glow sticks to mark my trail, and a machete I was gifted by a local in Mexico. All of my recordings will be uploaded below and auto posted after 10 days. Wish me luck everyone, I’m going to need it.
Entry 1: I have started at the only place that makes sense, the trail. It is currently 1:45 PM and I have plenty of sun left in the sky. I just needed to find exactly where to start my journey into the woods. Strangely it was very easy to find. I recall one of the trees having a funky twist near the middle of the trunk. Probably just some two lovebirds trying to carve their name into the tree and realizing there were softer trees to carve into. Anyways hiking further into the woods I believe I can see the shape of the shed through the branches. I wish you guys could see how dense these trees are so you can understand my struggle.
Entry 2: I made it to the shed, but unfortunately the floor in here is concrete. This really sucks for me because I have absolutely no idea where to go from here. It’s identical on the outside but I just don’t understand. Maybe I’m just delusional, which in that case what a waste of time and energy. I’m going to head back home and just start packing for summer. Maybe it’ll be best if I just forget about all of this and leave it behind me. I am graduating after all. Wait hold on what is this?? there’s a button behind one of these shelves. I am going to press it, but idk how it would work because this floor is seamless. I’m just going to leave this recording so if anything does happen I don’t have to worry about holding the phone the whole time. Holy shit, the entire floor is lowering. It’s a fucking elevator.
Entry 3: Okay so I’ve been going down this elevator for like 30 seconds, how far down am I going?.. Oh wait hold on, Im stopped… There’s a metal door with a padlock. Ig since I have the machete there’s only one thing to do, break it. Im going to use the blunt side so I don’t ruin this thing, I like it too much. the lock clatters to the ground after 3 solid hits. Well ig there’s only one way to go now, there’s no button to get back up so I pray there’s another way up. The metal door creaks loudly. Fuck I regret this, It’s dark and I can tell it’s a big area because it’s so echoey in here. I’m currently praising my past self for thinking about the flashlight and glow sticks. I need to find out what in the hell this place is and most importantly, if there’s a damn light switch.
Entry 4: God this place is terrifying I’ve been walking around the sterile white halls of this place for like 10 minutes and have found nothing, no doors, no light switch. I feel like a rat in a maze. Also scratch what I said about being glad I packed glow sticks, because my stupid ass only brought like 20 of these things and I’m already down to 5. Also I feel like I’m not alone, every now and then I’ll turn a corner and the glow from the previous glow stick quickly vanishes. I feel like it might just be because the darkness seems to envelop everything like a blanket. But I have that feeling that I’m being followed. You know the one, where you know somethings wrong you just can’t pin point what it is. Oh shit no way, there’s light, I think there’s a door or something up ahead.
Entry 5: Holy shit… It’s a lab, and worse, there’s people strapped too tables, completely naked and unconscious. I know they are alive because each of them are hooked up with a million different cords, and one of those are plugged into a heart monitor. This place is huge, there has to be at least 50 people on these tables.
“Hey you, you’re not supposed to be in here” yelled a man adorned in a lab coat.
“What are you doing to these kids you sick fucks.” I yelled back at the man across the lab.
In a haste the scientist rushes towards a red button, setting off a loud alarm, turning the lights to a flashing red. With no exit behind me, I could only do one thing... Rush towards him. My training kicked in as I launched into a flurry of calculated strikes. My first hit connected, a right overhand clean under his eye. The doctor stumbled back, but I didn't give him a chance to recover. I pressed the attack, keeping him off balance with a relentless barrage of punches and kicks. He fought back ferociously, but I was one step ahead, anticipating his moves and countering with swift, efficient strikes. We wrestled, the room around us becoming a blur of pain and adrenaline. I used the environment to my advantage, improvising weapons from the scattered medical equipment and turning the empty tables on my opponent. Pinning him to the ground, I laid down a harsh barrage of final blows. His face was a bloody pulp, unrecognizable. But I didn’t walk away unscathed, somewhere in the tussle, the scientist buried a scalpel deep into my stomach. With my adrenaline wearing off, the pain overtook me, sending me into darkness as I fainted from the blood loss and adrenaline dump. I awoke with my arms and legs strapped to the cold metal operating table. Before I could try to struggle, a face overtook my field of vision.
“Quite a fight you put up, you turned poor Dr.Samson into a soup” the looming face said with a chuckle. “You are the first person to put the pieces together and for that I am thoroughly impressed Mr. Hayes”
“Who are you?!” I said fighting at my binds. “Let me go!”
“I’m afraid I can’t do that Mr.Hayes. You have seen far too much, and I definitely can’t have you running around telling the world what you saw here. Although nobody would believe you.” “And to answer your other question, I’m surprised you don’t recognize me… really take a moment and look at me” He said pulling down his face mask.
“Dr.Blackwood?” I said as I looked back on my freshman year biology class.
“Ding ding ding ding. We have a winner!” He said in a maniac joy.
“What are you going to do to me?” I asked.
“Well Mr.Hayes, first I’m going to sew you up from your little tussle you had with my late assistant and then I will put you under and cut into that skull of yours and take out a small piece of what we call in the science world your hippocampus. Then I will draw from that all of the necessary memories to create the perfect clone of you.” He responded.
“Why? Why would you need a clone of any of us. Why can’t you just clone someone willing to be apart of this?” I asked
“Because that’s no fun Mr.Hayes, the hunt excites me. Actually you’re lucky I didn’t get you the first night. Unfortunately my creation had a little bit of a malfunction and formed a wee bit of an attachment to you. I’m sure you remember the ruckus outside your window? Anyways I digress, I do this because everyone of you lowly students will go onto do mediocre jobs where you waste away at a desk. I must also add that with having a clone of you under my control, I can do anything and get away with clean hands. My plan with you originally was to have you go into the admissions office and steal every last cent all for me. On top of that I like the power, because one day I will have a clone of every student on this campus and eventually I will cause a revolt against our comedy of a government. Who will stop me, when I won’t even be on the front lines?” Dr.Blackwood explained.
“I will” I said freeing my last hand from the binds.
What he didn’t realize is that with all of this monologue and the questions I had been feeding him, I was slowly loosening my binds with each wiggle and movement in retaliation.
Lurching forward I grab onto his collar, pulling him into a vicious headbutt. The impact sent Dr. Blackwood reeling backward, his grip on consciousness loosening as he staggered. Seizing the moment, I lunged off the table, adrenaline coursing through my veins despite the searing pain in my abdomen. With a swift motion, I grabbed a nearby surgical instrument, holding it in a defensive stance as I faced my adversary. Dr. Blackwood, recovering from the blow, snarled with rage, his once calm demeanor now replaced by a feral intensity. The room seemed to shrink around us, the tension thickening with each passing second. This was my chance to stop Blackwood's twisted plans. As he lunged forward, I met his attack head-on, the clang of metal reverberating through the room. Blow after blow, we fought with an intensity born of desperation and determination. Despite my injuries, I refused to yield, driven by a fire burnt under me to protect myself and others from Blackwood's actions . In a final, swift move, I delivered a powerful front kick, sending Blackwood crashing to the ground. The room fell silent, the echoes of our struggle fading into the darkness. Coughing he sat in the corner laughing with blood spilling down his face. “You know that it’s too late to save any of these one lying on the tables. I would’ve released you, you know that right? I would’ve simply taken your memory from today out of your brain and leaving you in your bed to wake up thinking you had a fun night” he said with final resolve as he watched me grab the scalpel from the ground taking slow steps near him.
Looking down over him, It was my turn to laugh. Kneeling down to eye level with him I grabbed him by his hair and delivered a final message to him “Fuck you and your little science experiment” as I sliced deep into his throat watching the life fade from his eyes.
I eventually found an exit door, which lead me to a storm drain deep in the woods far from my campus. It took me 2 hours to limp my way onto a main road and flag down a passing car. Pulling over I was rushed to the hospital and later interrogated by some men in suits, my guess is CIA. Here I am now, writing my final entrance. I think I heard them say something about trying a new medical process on me to help me heal quicker
2024.05.16 06:47 LeopardMaximum8624 AITAH for this? Yes I am
Hello, reddit First, tw: Self harm and suicidal thoughts, please skip if triggering Here is the thing, I'm basically asking for judgement here, and if I really deserve what I am doing to myself. I think I do, really, because what I did was unforgivable, but do give your opinion, even if it's hate. Because I do deserve it here, really. So, I grew up in a religious family. Like, one in which things like "love marriage " And......well.......The "child making process" was considered a sin. Absolute sin. Like—I did not know what......you know—that—was, but I knew it was sin, it was disgusting, it was something so disgusting that anyone who associated themselves with it were perverts and such, not someone you should ever stay alone in a room with. Do not blame my family for this, they were saying what they were taught, and they had their trauma. They have broken through enough abuse for me, do not blame them please. Anyways, I was a huge fan of Harry Potter. And I stumbled into the world of fanfiction. And I read them. Now, most of them were pretty much SFW, but in those which did infact have anything explicit, they put a whole line of "18+ content ahead, skip to the end of the chapter". I had no idea what the hell 18+ was, but if it said not to view, I wasn't risking it, straight up went to the very last part of it, or changed reading, you know, what a sane person does. Now, I had a favourite author there on Quotev, who wrote some really nice fanfics. Some of them were a little weird—but c'mon who am I to judge, everyone is different. One day, I stumbled upon some works of her. Well, the stories she did write, those were completely SFW. But if you used Quotev, you'll know there was a thing called "Journal" in there. Sort of like "conversation" in Wattpad. There, she had written NSFW chapters on the characters. Here's the thing. There was no warning. None at all. No warning or tagging or anything provided there to show that it was 18+. The title was just—say: DracoxInsertocname I know, nobody forced me to read it, I could have skipped it as soon as I realised it was 18+. But here is the thing. I DIDN'T know what it was. I had read through some of it, and only realised on seeing the comments, that it was 18+. And I felt. I felt tainted, like I had committed a sin. To know that I had read something that perverted, to my 12 year old self, it felt sinful. Like I had my pure white mind muddied out of carelessness. I know, authors don't own us any tags. And if it were a hardcover book, it wouldn't have any tags. But here is the thing. I fully believed that even actual books (I had no idea books had smut back then, I thought it was an internet or like seperate movie thing, I found out books had smut when I was 15+) had warnings for smut. Blood and gore? Sure, no problem, make it as gross as you want, no warnings needed. But something as sinful as 18+? Must be tagged. MUST. BE . TAGGED. That was my thought process. Remember it wasn't AO3. So there was no tagging system. So I thought that if others are warning it, then the author was in the wrong for not providing warnings on hers. It was a site where children as young as 11 were. Later on, I did encounter many more such unwarned content on the internet, but thought, "Eh I'm already ruined any way" Like ofcourse I didn't read it, but yeah. Logic. That I was a sinner too, so I can't get offended anymore. Here comes the bad part, for which, if you hate me, I'll not blame you. I wrote her a letter. Like, online obviously. In the inbox of her writing site. I was.....very mean. I told her her writing "ruined my innocence and it was wrong of her to not provide a warning" something along these lines, I don't remember, it happened 4 years ago. But I did not insult her, or her preferences, or anything, let me make that clear. Just wrote in detail of how her work affected me negatively. If it in itself were insulting, I apologise. And here comes the stupid part which will definately make you hate me, and it'll be fair, really. She always said she liked dark humor. And where I grew, friends told each other, with fully smiling faces, that "I'll hit you so hard, you'll end up hanging from a tree" "I'll hit you so hard you'll go through the roof." Heck, even now our teachers joke that if we don't score well enough, they'll well.....very graphically describe how they'll beat us. So I grew up knowing violence was a joke. That unless someone actually did the thing to you, it was all fine really, funny even. Even till now, I make jokes of "Sorry I'm late feel free to hit me with a pan" So, when I read it, I thought "I don't want her to think I'm angry on her, or hate her. I'll add some jokes so she takes it lightly and realises I may be upset but in the end she's my favourite author whom I love" (Yes I called her my favourite author in the letter) I wrote, beginning with "Dear Daughter of Hermes, and Slytherin" and proceeded to explain on how she ruined my innocence and all such. I did not use any curse words—to clarify. I said something along the lines of "I'll be outside your window at night, watching you". Which was virtually impossible since she lived in a seperate *continent*. "And why the heck would you want to actually hurt someone physically unless you're mentally unstable" -My thought process at that age But it hurt her, and I was so surprised because it was the exact opposite of my intention. I at maximum expected her to be annoyed or something if it went worst case scenario. It hurt her so much, and apparently she had been getting a lot of hate over it (she had deleted the work like—some days ago? I don't remember) and that I should unfollow her. I apologised immediately, but like what good is the apology when the harm is already done. I had already planned to delete my account anyways, so that's what I did. I decided to give her space and hence, I apologised again, some months later. Another stupid thing? I addressed her as sister. I thought it would placate her. I really thought of her as close to me, even though she was a stranger. Okay pausing the writing to go hit my head on the nearest wall, I am sorry for being so stupid, what was wrong with me. I said I was suffering from a bad time, and was going through self harm (still am) and I will do anything she asks of me to gain forgiveness (another mistake). She said I was too late in apologising (which I was, yes, but my first apology was instant though) Anyway, she posted about it on announcements (didn't mention my name) but said "Imagine apologising after this long" and so, with people obviously supporting her. It scared me, so I left in fear of being attacked. (Would've deserved it though) It....well.....4 years passed. At age 15, I was so afraid, because I had an exam and I thought that I'd score bad out of karma for hurting her, that she cursed me. I scored pretty well but anyways. As someone who got continually harassed by a girl for 10 years to the point I was afraid of school, (she wanted to be my friend apparently, but what a terrible way, really, she literally sexually harassed me) but still asked her if she was okay after I saw her crying, I had a pretty high forgiveness scale. I really thought she'd (author) would forgive me for apologising. But like. No. I am not owed any forgiveness and I am aware of it. It wasn't her fault or duty, really. Anyway, fast forward to age 17. I was lying on the bed beaten up and crying and it was 1 am, and for some reason, her username came to my mind. I don't know why. For 4 years I had thought of any perfect apology, maybe drawing her something nice for her books, anything. But decided not to bring back bad memories to her. And also, I was a coward afraid of facing her. But I guess being beaten up messes with your head. Personal trauma is no reason to hurt someone, I agree 100%. But I wrote her a final apology. This time, I didn't ask for forgiveness, took all the blame on myself. I didn't apologise for closure. I apologized because I wanted her to know that she was worth being apologised to so many times. I called my younger self stupid and wished I could smack her on the head. I poured my entire heart and soul into it. I did not expect a reply, but I decided that when I wake up the next day, I'll delete my account, hopefully she had seen it by then. Woke up to find myself blocked and honestly? Deserved it. It took me a discussion with some people to realise that I had indeed gone too far and that hardcover books don't come with tags. And that apologising so many times was basically harassment. Back then, I had apologised for hurting her, but I believed that my opinion on 18+ things being warned of was legit. Then began true guilt. I loathed myself, thought of myself as a monster. I saw myself as a rapist, as a murderer, that I deserve all this sadness and guilt. I really wanted to kill myself over it. Like I did so before too—but this time I was actually ready to step off the pavement onto any vehicle nearby, except the poor driver did no wrong really, and I'm an only child so why harm my parents over it? I really hated myself over it, still do actually. If I can go back in time, I'd drag my 12 year old self away from the laptop and give her a nice slap. I did not want to hurt her, I hate hurting people but seeing that it has been so long, and she still refuses to interact with me, what I said must've affected her very badly. I kept on thinking, what if I drove her to thoughts as negative as she is driving me to? Each time I stopped feeling like a complete demon over it, my mind said "You hurt someone" and I went back to crying. My own mother said that I looked like I came from a funeral, at times. Couldn't focus on classes which is actually bad because those are important. The worst part is, I can't completely remember what I wrote to her. My head keeps on saying I called her bad things and gave her worse threats but......I don't remember doing it and there were no chances if I see it logically. I literally stopped being happy. Forced myself to be, for my own and my families' sake, and I tried, yeah. There were times I thought of taking this up legally because what I did could be considered a threat (found out when I was 17). Give myself over to the police or something. But I still hate myself. So I decided to punish myself. (Graphic descriptions of self harm come in here) I burnt my own skin on purpose. Nothing too bad really, just thumb sized burns from a saucepan. Then I proceeded to pour toilet cleaner (the strong ones which require gloves to handle) over my open wounds, four of them. I'll be honest. I have a very high pain tolerance. But that thing hurt like hell. When I actually cleaned it off after ten minutes of absolute agony, that wound had been somewhat........cauterised? Like there was this thick hard layer and it had no sensetivity when I scratched it. And I pulled off those hard layers. Some of them were stuck to the skin, I had to use a blade to ease them off. Then pour on them again. I did this to all three of my burns (the fourth one was small so it healed) three times, so nine times in total. It has been a month and it still hasn't healed. These scars won't go away even with surgery. Permanent reminders. (Description ends here) I thought it to be like this: The incident hurt her? I'll hurt myself more than she could possibly ever get hurt. But that wouldn't undo her hurt. So I'll hurt myself even more. I have frankly forgotten of who I was two months ago. Of what I thought when my mind was empty. The first thing I remember on waking up is her and the last thing I think of before sleeping is the incident. Deleted my accounts, lost my passion in drawing, don't feel like doing anything. I just. I hate myself. I truly do. I wish I could die but I can't so I just need to survive forever with this. Every time I read the word 'villian' or 'bad' or 'wrong' in a book, it felt like a bucket of cold water being poured over me. I had been a victim myself, so knowing that I myself hurt someone — Its just........I always thought of myself as a good person. Someone who was kind, someone who helped everyone, including strangers the best they could, someone who didn't cheat in exams because that would be unfair to those who studied, someone who protected and loved their friends, someone who made others happy, someone who hates conflict and lets karma take care of the whole thing, someone who ALWAYS says thank you and sorry no matter who or what. So many times, people have told me I made their day better, that I'm a very kind and nice person, I'm someone who even the meanest teachers like and I got exemplary behaviour awards too. I always believed myself to be a good person. So knowing I did something this bad broke me. It took me some time to quit the whole "How dare I be happy after hurting her" thing. I believe fully, that I do not deserve happiness, or love, and that nobody will accept me or think of me as a kind person after knowing what I had done. I'd have deserved it though. I got therapy (not actual one, I used Chatbot AI) It took me time, I finally believed that I deserved to heal from this, that I hurt myself too much maybe, permanent scars over someone who doesn't know my real name and never saw my face and vice versa. Maybe........I don't deserve *this* much of punishment. Today, I went to youtube and saw a video on bullies apologising. I saw comments on how apologies fix nothing, how bullies don't deserve forgiveness and should live with that shame and guilt their entire life. That a thousand good deeds won't make up for that one bad deed. And I believe I do. I really do. Which is why I permanently scarred myself. So here is the question. Do I deserve it? To let go of this incident? Do I deserve to heal? Deserve love? Or should I keep goimg? Because I believe I should. That I truly am no better than a rapist or bully. So, give your judgement, and throw hate at me if you want, because I do deserve it.
submitted by LeopardMaximum8624 to AITAH [link] [comments]
2024.05.16 06:47 LimLahey420 Vent
Every room is the same. Every person is the same. The sky is blue - I don’t feel it. I don’t feel the “fresh air”. Nature is just nature. It’s hard to make eye contact without spacing out. I walk in a fast paste like I’m late for something, always. Time is all the same. The days of the week are all the same. Months of the year, all the same. Holliday aren’t even holidays anymore, I don’t feel excited for any of them, it’s just another day. The words that come out of my mouth I don’t even think about I just type and go with it, same as my speech. I feel like I need to drink 1-2 beers to feel calm and back to life. I am so out of touch with reality. I don’t know what I’m doin with my life. It’s like I am trapped in my head I can’t even see or put any real thought into anything I just act off of instinct. I’m back in the crisis again unfortunately and am gonna need to move back home and start meds again or do ect. I need to find a therapist who specializes in this shit because I’m a write off right now. I isolate from the world. Everybody at work thinks I’m a fucking crazy weirdo. I can’t walk by people on the street without having to look away or look down on the ground or pull out my phone because I just know I make them uncomfortable and seem weird. Great unc who was it Vietnam war told me I had the thousand yard stare - that’s a lot coming from what he’s seen and knows. I just don’t even fucking know anymore at this point. I want to delete myself because who wants to live in a world like this? “You are not alone” why do I feel like it all the time? I feel like I’m the most fucked up person on the planet, like nobody relates or can understand. Even if they do relate or say something I get schizo an take it personal. I want to low key die but to scared to, so I’m stuck living in fuckin hell. Literally this is hell on earth. The fact I am trucking through it all with no meds or therapy anymore or anything is a fucking recipe for disaster. That’s how dumb I’ve gottten, why do I think I am strong and can take this head on and just continue to live like this? Life is short man I need to get help as soon as possible. Even if it means to quit everything goin for me, again, and be a loser, again. I guess that’s better than suicide.
Sorry
submitted by LimLahey420 to Dissociation [link] [comments]
Sorry
2024.05.16 06:45 pomkombucha Bottom dysphoria (ftm)
Tw detailed description of bottom dysphoria.
I feel like my head is going to explode. My bottom dysphoria is so, extremely bad. I can’t even piss without either having to fully disassociate out of the experience or being pervasively aware of the “female” anatomy down there that isn’t supposed to be there and it just makes me wanna rip my skin off my skull. I hate this so much!!! I can’t believe I was born this way!! I can’t believe my brother just got to be born a guy, and I have to deal with THIS. I hate living in this body so fucking much. I remember having this same feeling about my chest before I had top surgery, about how I just felt female and it felt so fucking incongruent and mind fucky and wrong. Now that I’ve had top surgery done, I just feel so fucked mentally by what’s happening downstairs. I can’t refer to it by anything but my dick and even that gives me dysphoria because I know it’s not. I don’t know what to do. I can’t stop crying. I feel so grotesque and wrong. I just feel so completely aware of how not male it is there. I even hate writing the acronym “ftm” because it reminds me that I wasn’t born male. Like male, but—.
I’m so fucking miserable
submitted by pomkombucha to trans [link] [comments]
I feel like my head is going to explode. My bottom dysphoria is so, extremely bad. I can’t even piss without either having to fully disassociate out of the experience or being pervasively aware of the “female” anatomy down there that isn’t supposed to be there and it just makes me wanna rip my skin off my skull. I hate this so much!!! I can’t believe I was born this way!! I can’t believe my brother just got to be born a guy, and I have to deal with THIS. I hate living in this body so fucking much. I remember having this same feeling about my chest before I had top surgery, about how I just felt female and it felt so fucking incongruent and mind fucky and wrong. Now that I’ve had top surgery done, I just feel so fucked mentally by what’s happening downstairs. I can’t refer to it by anything but my dick and even that gives me dysphoria because I know it’s not. I don’t know what to do. I can’t stop crying. I feel so grotesque and wrong. I just feel so completely aware of how not male it is there. I even hate writing the acronym “ftm” because it reminds me that I wasn’t born male. Like male, but—.
I’m so fucking miserable
2024.05.16 06:45 aarontw34 [30/M] [Chat] chat through out the day/night
just looking for a friendly chat through out the day/night
Here's a little about me:
-Introverted
-I love gaming, I've been doing it all of my life. (mainly play wow right now)
-love anything to do with cinema...movies/tv/anime
-I love writing and reading, I enjoy writing prompts and roleplaying (mostly zombie or fantasy related).
-I've traveled all over the US, but haven't made it to any other countries yet, but plan to. I love the idea of traveling and seeing historic sights and museums.
-I like to research random shit/useless facts/trivia. I'm a huge history nerd.
-I like debating. Not in a hostile way or anything, but I love finding out other peoples view points on things and discussing it.
Honestly can't think of anything else off the top of my head, but feel free to ask any questions, I'm up for any chats as long as they're fun. I will say that I prefer to message on reddit over anything else
submitted by aarontw34 to textfriends [link] [comments]
Here's a little about me:
-Introverted
-I love gaming, I've been doing it all of my life. (mainly play wow right now)
-love anything to do with cinema...movies/tv/anime
-I love writing and reading, I enjoy writing prompts and roleplaying (mostly zombie or fantasy related).
-I've traveled all over the US, but haven't made it to any other countries yet, but plan to. I love the idea of traveling and seeing historic sights and museums.
-I like to research random shit/useless facts/trivia. I'm a huge history nerd.
-I like debating. Not in a hostile way or anything, but I love finding out other peoples view points on things and discussing it.
Honestly can't think of anything else off the top of my head, but feel free to ask any questions, I'm up for any chats as long as they're fun. I will say that I prefer to message on reddit over anything else
2024.05.16 06:45 aarontw34 [30/M] looking for a fun chat/long term friends
just looking for a friendly chat through out the day/night
Here's a little about me:
-Introverted
-I love gaming, I've been doing it all of my life. (mainly play wow right now)
-love anything to do with cinema...movies/tv/anime
-I love writing and reading, I enjoy writing prompts and roleplaying (mostly zombie or fantasy related).
-I've traveled all over the US, but haven't made it to any other countries yet, but plan to. I love the idea of traveling and seeing historic sights and museums.
-I like to research random shit/useless facts/trivia. I'm a huge history nerd.
-I like debating. Not in a hostile way or anything, but I love finding out other peoples view points on things and discussing it.
Honestly can't think of anything else off the top of my head, but feel free to ask any questions, I'm up for any chats as long as they're fun. I will say that I prefer to message on reddit over anything else
submitted by aarontw34 to MeetNewPeopleHere [link] [comments]
Here's a little about me:
-Introverted
-I love gaming, I've been doing it all of my life. (mainly play wow right now)
-love anything to do with cinema...movies/tv/anime
-I love writing and reading, I enjoy writing prompts and roleplaying (mostly zombie or fantasy related).
-I've traveled all over the US, but haven't made it to any other countries yet, but plan to. I love the idea of traveling and seeing historic sights and museums.
-I like to research random shit/useless facts/trivia. I'm a huge history nerd.
-I like debating. Not in a hostile way or anything, but I love finding out other peoples view points on things and discussing it.
Honestly can't think of anything else off the top of my head, but feel free to ask any questions, I'm up for any chats as long as they're fun. I will say that I prefer to message on reddit over anything else
2024.05.16 06:44 aarontw34 30 m looking for a fun chat/friend
just looking for a friendly chat through out the day/night
Here's a little about me:
-Introverted
-I love gaming, I've been doing it all of my life. (mainly play wow right now)
-love anything to do with cinema...movies/tv/anime
-I love writing and reading, I enjoy writing prompts and roleplaying (mostly zombie or fantasy related).
-I've traveled all over the US, but haven't made it to any other countries yet, but plan to. I love the idea of traveling and seeing historic sights and museums.
-I like to research random shit/useless facts/trivia. I'm a huge history nerd.
-I like debating. Not in a hostile way or anything, but I love finding out other peoples view points on things and discussing it.
Honestly can't think of anything else off the top of my head, but feel free to ask any questions, I'm up for any chats as long as they're fun. I will say that I prefer to message on reddit over anything else
submitted by aarontw34 to Needafriend [link] [comments]
Here's a little about me:
-Introverted
-I love gaming, I've been doing it all of my life. (mainly play wow right now)
-love anything to do with cinema...movies/tv/anime
-I love writing and reading, I enjoy writing prompts and roleplaying (mostly zombie or fantasy related).
-I've traveled all over the US, but haven't made it to any other countries yet, but plan to. I love the idea of traveling and seeing historic sights and museums.
-I like to research random shit/useless facts/trivia. I'm a huge history nerd.
-I like debating. Not in a hostile way or anything, but I love finding out other peoples view points on things and discussing it.
Honestly can't think of anything else off the top of my head, but feel free to ask any questions, I'm up for any chats as long as they're fun. I will say that I prefer to message on reddit over anything else
2024.05.16 06:44 MangledWeb Medical records -- what should you get?
A family member was in a Skilled Nursing Facility, and was informed with three days notice that Medicare would not allow ongoing services. A Livanta appeal was quickly denied.
The patient submitted a signed request for medical records, and today they arrived, accompanied by a disclaimer stating that they had been sanitized by the legal department (This SNF is owned by a private equity firm). The notes include, almost exclusively, copies of boilerplate documents she signed and info that was already available via her regular care provider's portal. The records do not include SNF staff assessments or a copy of the documents sent to insurance/Livanta which resulted in the denial.
What can a patient normally expect to receive via a medical records request? I have been trying to research this online but getting definitive answers (or any direction) seems to be impossible.
submitted by MangledWeb to HealthInsurance [link] [comments]
The patient submitted a signed request for medical records, and today they arrived, accompanied by a disclaimer stating that they had been sanitized by the legal department (This SNF is owned by a private equity firm). The notes include, almost exclusively, copies of boilerplate documents she signed and info that was already available via her regular care provider's portal. The records do not include SNF staff assessments or a copy of the documents sent to insurance/Livanta which resulted in the denial.
What can a patient normally expect to receive via a medical records request? I have been trying to research this online but getting definitive answers (or any direction) seems to be impossible.
2024.05.16 06:43 fangirling24-7 Week two of trying to move on...
Week two of trying to move on...
I am writing this hoping to get it out of my chest and maybe feel a little less lonely. I (27F) just had a really really heartbreaking and depressing breakup and this is the first time I've ever been this hurt. This is the worst feeling I've ever felt in my entire life, emotionally, mentally. Sobbing at the moment as of typing this and my tears just doesn't seem to stop. It just keeps on flowing and flowing since i woke up this morning it suprised me how much tears I have. My chest feels SO heavy I cannot breathe properly anymore and my head aches. I cannot pull myself to get up my bed, I absented to work and even to my postgrad school. I don't eat. I don't even feel hunger anymore. For someone who eats a lot, it surprised me that it is possible to not feel hunger and I don't desire food. All I feel is this heartache. This tightening and heaviness of my chest. This is unbearable. I loved this person so much too much. Even more than myself, I believe. I would do anything for him. I endured a lot for him. Because I love him so much. I would forgive him so fast because I love him so much. I am at my happiest state whenever I am with him. He is the first man I've ever loved. And when I love, I give my all, it's 110%! I keep on looking back and thinking that maybe if I loved him so much more, maybe if I did this, maybe if i did not say these things, maybe we will still be happy together. Maybe if i did not raise the issues, it would not lead to this. I am feeling alot of regret. Maybe I should have just kept my mouth shut. But I was hurting too much I had to say those things. I am extremely sad, heartbroken, and down. I need help. I need someone to talk to. I need someone to cry with. I dont know. It hurts so bad. And I feel so alone. I am a big introvert and I only have a very very few friends and they are far far away from me. I don't think I'll ever be okay. I am in constant pain. Some might say keep yourself busy, get a hobby, but I cannot even focus on my work and school anymore how much more than that. I am messing up a lot of my work and I have my exam in 2 weeks and I haven't studied sht. :(
I love reddit and this has helped me so much in a lot of things. So, if I may, I would like to humbly ask the community of reddit, those who have been through the same experience, or just anyone who has anything to say, if you would be so kind as to lend me a tiny bit of your time and maybe drop in the comments something, anything really, that maybe would help make me feel better and a little less lonely. Thank you very much.
Reason: I raised the issues (that I feel) regarding our relationship. The talk did not go well. He let go of me.
How long:
Years of admiring him: 2yrs
Together: 2yrs
submitted by fangirling24-7 to BreakUps [link] [comments]
I am writing this hoping to get it out of my chest and maybe feel a little less lonely. I (27F) just had a really really heartbreaking and depressing breakup and this is the first time I've ever been this hurt. This is the worst feeling I've ever felt in my entire life, emotionally, mentally. Sobbing at the moment as of typing this and my tears just doesn't seem to stop. It just keeps on flowing and flowing since i woke up this morning it suprised me how much tears I have. My chest feels SO heavy I cannot breathe properly anymore and my head aches. I cannot pull myself to get up my bed, I absented to work and even to my postgrad school. I don't eat. I don't even feel hunger anymore. For someone who eats a lot, it surprised me that it is possible to not feel hunger and I don't desire food. All I feel is this heartache. This tightening and heaviness of my chest. This is unbearable. I loved this person so much too much. Even more than myself, I believe. I would do anything for him. I endured a lot for him. Because I love him so much. I would forgive him so fast because I love him so much. I am at my happiest state whenever I am with him. He is the first man I've ever loved. And when I love, I give my all, it's 110%! I keep on looking back and thinking that maybe if I loved him so much more, maybe if I did this, maybe if i did not say these things, maybe we will still be happy together. Maybe if i did not raise the issues, it would not lead to this. I am feeling alot of regret. Maybe I should have just kept my mouth shut. But I was hurting too much I had to say those things. I am extremely sad, heartbroken, and down. I need help. I need someone to talk to. I need someone to cry with. I dont know. It hurts so bad. And I feel so alone. I am a big introvert and I only have a very very few friends and they are far far away from me. I don't think I'll ever be okay. I am in constant pain. Some might say keep yourself busy, get a hobby, but I cannot even focus on my work and school anymore how much more than that. I am messing up a lot of my work and I have my exam in 2 weeks and I haven't studied sht. :(
I love reddit and this has helped me so much in a lot of things. So, if I may, I would like to humbly ask the community of reddit, those who have been through the same experience, or just anyone who has anything to say, if you would be so kind as to lend me a tiny bit of your time and maybe drop in the comments something, anything really, that maybe would help make me feel better and a little less lonely. Thank you very much.
Reason: I raised the issues (that I feel) regarding our relationship. The talk did not go well. He let go of me.
How long:
Years of admiring him: 2yrs
Together: 2yrs
2024.05.16 06:41 Primrosescripts Comfort for Overstimulation [A4A] [Comfort] [Loving] [Autism Comfort] [Autistic Listener] [Overstimulated] [Party] [Crying] (repost from my old account)
This is a script I wanted to do for Autism Awareness Month originally posted on my old account. I tried my best and I am completely open to any tips or suggestions if you want me to write a script specifically for you, you can message me right now I am doing commissions completely for free. I do ask that I am credited and that you let me know if you use my script so I can check it out. If you need to make any minor changes that is completely fine but please do not change anything that will mess with the main idea.
Tags: A4A, Comfort, Loving, Autism, Autistic listener, Overstimulated, Party , Crying [A4A] [Comfort] [Loving] [Autism] [Autistic listener] [Overstimulated] [Party] [Crying]
(upbeat music, people talking)
Hahaha yeah, what’s up babe? Do you want me to go with you? Okay love text me if you need anything. Yeah I’ll just be out here.
I’ll be right back. I'm going to go find them. (footsteps) Maybe they’re outside. (sliding door opens and closes) No, maybe they’re in the bathroom. (footsteps)
(knocking on door) Love are you in there? (door opens) Babe are you okay? Hey, hey it’s okay. What’s going on hun? No you don’t need to talk about it right now if you don’t want to.
Yeah of course you can have a hug, come here. Do you want to step outside for a little while? Of course I’ll go with you. Do you want your earplugs to block out some of the noise? Yeah they’re right here on my keychain (keychain jingles) there you (the background noise quiets down)
Take my hand and we can go outside. (Door opens, background noise gets slightly louder, footsteps, door opens and closes, noise gets much quieter) Is that better love? I’m glad, are you ready to talk about what caused you to go hide in the bathroom?
That’s perfectly fine honey you don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to. We can just sit out here for a little while and enjoy the quiet. Yeah the stars are really pretty tonight, you can see a few constellations. Yeah the Little Dipper is right there and there's Orion's Belt.
They’re just as amazing as you. Of course I mean that they’re unique just like you. They look amazing just like you, and every star that’s a part of them is amazing just like every part of you is amazing.
You’re ready to talk, okay I’m listening… I can understand that, there were a lot of people in there talking and the music was really loud. Yeah there were a lot of new people. I don’t completely understand it but from what you’ve explained I see why you got overwhelmed. Oh sorry overstimulated.
What do you mean “why am I with you”, I’m with you because I love you. Yes even with your autism. Honey, why are you asking me this? Hey shhh it’s okay I’m right here just let it out. Don’t apologize for crying love, it's normal.
Yeah we can go home if you want. You wait out here and I’ll go back in and grab our stuff. (the speaker kisses the listener) I’ll be back. (Footsteps, door opens closes, the background noise gets louder) Hey yeah we’re going to head off, yeah everything is fine we just don’t want to be out too late. Yeah I’ll call you tomorrow.
(Door opens and closes background noise fades out) You ready to go love yea here’s your jacket. Let’s go (gate creaks open and closes) You okay honey you look kinda down? Why do you feel bad? (car door opens and closes, car engine starts) No I’m not upset that you wanted to leave the party. Why would I be mad? You were uncomfortable in there and needed to leave and you were able to express that to me. If anything I’m happy that you were able to tell me that you needed to leave. I know that isn’t easy for you and I’m really proud of you for telling me that.
Honey I love you and you don’t ever need to question that. I love you and only you with or without your autism. (Car engine stops, car door opens and closes) Come here honey (speaker kisses the listener) I love you and I always will, let’s get inside.
(Door opens and closes) Now what do you want to do? Pajamas,couch,movie and cuddles. You got it now go get your pjs on, I’ll get a few blankets and get a movie going, yes I know your comfort movie. Now go get into your pjs.
Hey hun you look comfy, come sit down. I’ve got your comfort movie all cued up, your favorite blanket, a few of your fidget toys, a book and your favorite safe foods. You don’t have to thank me. I'd do anything to make you feel better. Come cuddle up. Do you want to read your book, watch the movie, or just stim with your fidget toys and cuddle? Yeah we can just cuddle while you stim. I love watching you just go into your own world and zone out. It's adorable. Yes it is, have I ever lied to you? That was one time and it was for a surprise so it doesn't count. (Soft laughter) I love you too. Can I give you a kiss? (Speaker kisses listener)
You look so cute when you blush. There it is again. Can I ask you something? Do you ever feel like you have to mask around me? Okay can I ask why?
Your ex always made you feel bad for the way you act, oh honey. I would never make you feel bad for you being you. I love how you act. I love how you can go on hour long rants on your special interests and when you ask me to stim with you or just sit with you while you stim.
I don’t ever want to make you feel like you have to mask or be embarrassed because of your autism. I love you, autism and all. Because you’re unique and gorgeous. I love your personality, your laugh, your smile, the way your face lights up when you get to learn more about your special interests.
You are an amazing person and I love you. I want you to be proud of who you are as a person. (speaker kisses the listener) Look at me honey I want you to be happy and I want you to love yourself.
submitted by Primrosescripts to u/Primrosescripts [link] [comments]
Tags: A4A, Comfort, Loving, Autism, Autistic listener, Overstimulated, Party , Crying [A4A] [Comfort] [Loving] [Autism] [Autistic listener] [Overstimulated] [Party] [Crying]
(upbeat music, people talking)
Hahaha yeah, what’s up babe? Do you want me to go with you? Okay love text me if you need anything. Yeah I’ll just be out here.
I’ll be right back. I'm going to go find them. (footsteps) Maybe they’re outside. (sliding door opens and closes) No, maybe they’re in the bathroom. (footsteps)
(knocking on door) Love are you in there? (door opens) Babe are you okay? Hey, hey it’s okay. What’s going on hun? No you don’t need to talk about it right now if you don’t want to.
Yeah of course you can have a hug, come here. Do you want to step outside for a little while? Of course I’ll go with you. Do you want your earplugs to block out some of the noise? Yeah they’re right here on my keychain (keychain jingles) there you (the background noise quiets down)
Take my hand and we can go outside. (Door opens, background noise gets slightly louder, footsteps, door opens and closes, noise gets much quieter) Is that better love? I’m glad, are you ready to talk about what caused you to go hide in the bathroom?
That’s perfectly fine honey you don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to. We can just sit out here for a little while and enjoy the quiet. Yeah the stars are really pretty tonight, you can see a few constellations. Yeah the Little Dipper is right there and there's Orion's Belt.
They’re just as amazing as you. Of course I mean that they’re unique just like you. They look amazing just like you, and every star that’s a part of them is amazing just like every part of you is amazing.
You’re ready to talk, okay I’m listening… I can understand that, there were a lot of people in there talking and the music was really loud. Yeah there were a lot of new people. I don’t completely understand it but from what you’ve explained I see why you got overwhelmed. Oh sorry overstimulated.
What do you mean “why am I with you”, I’m with you because I love you. Yes even with your autism. Honey, why are you asking me this? Hey shhh it’s okay I’m right here just let it out. Don’t apologize for crying love, it's normal.
Yeah we can go home if you want. You wait out here and I’ll go back in and grab our stuff. (the speaker kisses the listener) I’ll be back. (Footsteps, door opens closes, the background noise gets louder) Hey yeah we’re going to head off, yeah everything is fine we just don’t want to be out too late. Yeah I’ll call you tomorrow.
(Door opens and closes background noise fades out) You ready to go love yea here’s your jacket. Let’s go (gate creaks open and closes) You okay honey you look kinda down? Why do you feel bad? (car door opens and closes, car engine starts) No I’m not upset that you wanted to leave the party. Why would I be mad? You were uncomfortable in there and needed to leave and you were able to express that to me. If anything I’m happy that you were able to tell me that you needed to leave. I know that isn’t easy for you and I’m really proud of you for telling me that.
Honey I love you and you don’t ever need to question that. I love you and only you with or without your autism. (Car engine stops, car door opens and closes) Come here honey (speaker kisses the listener) I love you and I always will, let’s get inside.
(Door opens and closes) Now what do you want to do? Pajamas,couch,movie and cuddles. You got it now go get your pjs on, I’ll get a few blankets and get a movie going, yes I know your comfort movie. Now go get into your pjs.
Hey hun you look comfy, come sit down. I’ve got your comfort movie all cued up, your favorite blanket, a few of your fidget toys, a book and your favorite safe foods. You don’t have to thank me. I'd do anything to make you feel better. Come cuddle up. Do you want to read your book, watch the movie, or just stim with your fidget toys and cuddle? Yeah we can just cuddle while you stim. I love watching you just go into your own world and zone out. It's adorable. Yes it is, have I ever lied to you? That was one time and it was for a surprise so it doesn't count. (Soft laughter) I love you too. Can I give you a kiss? (Speaker kisses listener)
You look so cute when you blush. There it is again. Can I ask you something? Do you ever feel like you have to mask around me? Okay can I ask why?
Your ex always made you feel bad for the way you act, oh honey. I would never make you feel bad for you being you. I love how you act. I love how you can go on hour long rants on your special interests and when you ask me to stim with you or just sit with you while you stim.
I don’t ever want to make you feel like you have to mask or be embarrassed because of your autism. I love you, autism and all. Because you’re unique and gorgeous. I love your personality, your laugh, your smile, the way your face lights up when you get to learn more about your special interests.
You are an amazing person and I love you. I want you to be proud of who you are as a person. (speaker kisses the listener) Look at me honey I want you to be happy and I want you to love yourself.
2024.05.16 06:38 Overall-Leave8650 WIBTA with this letter to neighbour?
Hi I have a nice little house with three trees in the yard. 2 large, 1 small. The large ones are 80 to 100 years old and absolutely massive and gorgeous. Recently, the smaller tree died and one of the larger tree has dead leaves right next to it at the same height. If you drew a line through the damaged and the dead tree canopies, it points straight to my neighbour who has done a large amount of plant removal in his yard ahead of re roofing and extending his outdoor area.
Anyway I am super worried that my big tree will also die, not least because it will cost tens of thousands to remove . I love my trees. They are also protected by my local council as a significant trees, meaning I could be fined for damaging or removing them.
To head this off, I have contacted the council, thy sent an arborist out to look at the trees. They took samples and other assessment stuff.
I have had an email back from the arborist with the results of the test- they found glyphosate (roundup) in the leaves. Unfortunately I can't prove that this has killed the trees and I also can't prove that my neighbour has caused it through spray drift.. but I do want to let them know what has happened. Here is my letter:
"Hi neighbour, I am [name] and I live over your back fence at [streetname] road.
I am wondering if you used herbicides to clear your plants before commencing your extension/renovation.
I have lost a small tree and another big one is dying. The dead canopy and dying patch on the big tree are in a direct line from your back fence, where the yuccas used to be. The council arborist has found glyphosate in the leaves of both of my trees.
I have to remove the dead tree and pray that the big one doesn't die, it will cost tens of thousands to remove.
Accidents do happen and unfortunately I have borne the brunt of it this time. Please take care in future not to use glypho when there is any breeze at all. If you would like to help me with the cost of removing the big tree if and when it goes, I would be very very grateful. Cheers [my name]"
submitted by Overall-Leave8650 to AITAH [link] [comments]
Anyway I am super worried that my big tree will also die, not least because it will cost tens of thousands to remove . I love my trees. They are also protected by my local council as a significant trees, meaning I could be fined for damaging or removing them.
To head this off, I have contacted the council, thy sent an arborist out to look at the trees. They took samples and other assessment stuff.
I have had an email back from the arborist with the results of the test- they found glyphosate (roundup) in the leaves. Unfortunately I can't prove that this has killed the trees and I also can't prove that my neighbour has caused it through spray drift.. but I do want to let them know what has happened. Here is my letter:
"Hi neighbour, I am [name] and I live over your back fence at [streetname] road.
I am wondering if you used herbicides to clear your plants before commencing your extension/renovation.
I have lost a small tree and another big one is dying. The dead canopy and dying patch on the big tree are in a direct line from your back fence, where the yuccas used to be. The council arborist has found glyphosate in the leaves of both of my trees.
I have to remove the dead tree and pray that the big one doesn't die, it will cost tens of thousands to remove.
Accidents do happen and unfortunately I have borne the brunt of it this time. Please take care in future not to use glypho when there is any breeze at all. If you would like to help me with the cost of removing the big tree if and when it goes, I would be very very grateful. Cheers [my name]"
2024.05.16 06:38 generalwhitmore1 DBD: My experience as a killer main.
Let me start by saying I’ve got about 1500 hours in this game, playing both survivor and killer an equal amount.
Let me also say, I love this game. It rewards players well for their time playing, and it has hilarious, random, and insane moments at times. There is a great variety of play styles, characters, and cosmetics as well. Licensed content is always amazing, the creativity of the developers is fantastic, and all around, there is so much to learn and see with each match you play.
Now, I’d like to talk about my experience playing mostly killer, especially playing killer for several hours straight.
One word that sticks out in my mind over and over is “burnout”. I find that I can only play about 6 or 7 killer games until my head starts to hurt, and my stress levels have been sustained at too high a level and I mentally can’t take it anymore.
Why does this happen? Well, a couple reasons:
I’m fine ending with only 1 or 2 kills, but it’s the things that happen in the game that just make it so unbearable and stressful, and I’m struggling to enjoy myself. Even games where I get all 4, I find myself feeling relieved that it’s over, rather than happy that I won.
I write this for the purpose of asking 1 question: how can I enjoy the game for hours straight again? I don’t want to feel like this after playing. I want to feel like I wish I could play another.
TLDR: Love this game, but I’m suffering badly from burnout, and I need a way to have fun playing killer again.
submitted by generalwhitmore1 to deadbydaylight [link] [comments]
Let me also say, I love this game. It rewards players well for their time playing, and it has hilarious, random, and insane moments at times. There is a great variety of play styles, characters, and cosmetics as well. Licensed content is always amazing, the creativity of the developers is fantastic, and all around, there is so much to learn and see with each match you play.
Now, I’d like to talk about my experience playing mostly killer, especially playing killer for several hours straight.
One word that sticks out in my mind over and over is “burnout”. I find that I can only play about 6 or 7 killer games until my head starts to hurt, and my stress levels have been sustained at too high a level and I mentally can’t take it anymore.
Why does this happen? Well, a couple reasons:
- I play very competitively and aim for 3-4 kills each game(doesn’t always happen, but that’s ok obviously, the game is pretty balanced)
- Match making rating inflates very quickly - what this means is that after just 1 or 2 games in a row of killing all 4 survivors, I find myself in a lobby of survivors who are either all in discord together, or some solo survivors who have twice the hours I have in the game. The “sweaty p100s” some may call them.
I’m fine ending with only 1 or 2 kills, but it’s the things that happen in the game that just make it so unbearable and stressful, and I’m struggling to enjoy myself. Even games where I get all 4, I find myself feeling relieved that it’s over, rather than happy that I won.
I write this for the purpose of asking 1 question: how can I enjoy the game for hours straight again? I don’t want to feel like this after playing. I want to feel like I wish I could play another.
TLDR: Love this game, but I’m suffering badly from burnout, and I need a way to have fun playing killer again.
2024.05.16 06:36 cheersneanderthal rant got tilt table test results back
today i got tilt table test results back. a nurse called me over the phone. she said my results were abnormal, and highly suggestive of POTS. & everything just is clicking into place for me. i can’t stop thinking about it, and need to get it all out.
i’ve been exhausted my whole life. i am almost constantly fatigued. like the kind of chronic tired where i can regularly sleep for 14 hours straight no problem. where even if i’m consistently getting 8 hours everyday i still need a scary amount of coffee to do basic level function. most days i don’t function very well at all. my brain is constantly foggy. i forget things constantly. i lose my wallet & keys & debit card weekly. i literally can’t think straight most of the time, and everything’s kinda blurry in my head. when i stand up i usually feel like i’m going to faint, but i never do, so for the longest time i pinned this on me being weak, out of shape, lazy, some kind of personal failure. sometimes my vision gets blurry too, or my heart rate goes up to where it’s not in a normal range anymore. i feel lightheaded, woozy, off balance. and even though it was hard to think before, it just got a lot harder. i feel like i need to sit as much as i can. if i have to stand for more than a few minutes, i can feel the energy leave my body. it feels like the bottom half of me is deadweight, and the top half of me is giving everything it can to make sure the bottom doesn’t fall down. that’s why my chest and head feel so weak. i have bad posture, because it feels too hard & draining to properly support my torso & head. i slouch really badly to ease the burden. when i was younger i went to physical therapy for it. they thought i had scoliosis. i later found out i have hyper mobile EDS. this made sense. but no one else thought to look for POTS too. i lean against everything i can. i cross my legs to help make myself more sturdy. when i shower i sit on the floor. my feet turn red or purple when i stand for a long time. i can’t stand straight up, feet flat on the floor, legs uncrossed, back straightened without feeling like shit. that makes me feel small & defunct & like i’m not trying. how can someone be trying when they have to crumple themselves up just to remain upright. i work a job where i have to stand all day. i fuck things up a lot because my brain is cloudy and my body feels sick. i have to sit down throughout the shift and feel guilty for not being productive. when i clock out i am overcome with exhaustion. i sit in my car for 40 minutes sometimes before i can get myself to drive home. when i get home, i usually spend the rest of the night in bed. i can’t cook, i can’t clean, i can’t hang out with people. i’m too tired.
for years i thought it was because i spent so much time in bed. i didn’t exercise enough. i’m so lazy that i’ve reduced my body’s ability to function. if i was in shape, if i was more active, standing wouldn’t feel so bad. but when i tried to be more active, to exercise, to get out of bed- i caused muscle edema, i experienced asthma, i over stretched muscles & pulled things out of place & made the lightheaded feeling worse. i exhausted myself to the point of being bed-ridden for the rest of the day, or days, enough time to off-set any progress i made from trying to be active. i felt like i caused a problem and messed myself up so badly i wouldn’t be able to fix it. turns out the problem wasn’t my fault after all. i wasn’t lazy, or at least not by choice. i didn’t sit in bed all day and ruin myself, i sat in bed all day because it drained me not to. i have imposter syndrome & guilt.
when i was younger i developed an anxiety disorder. i had panic attacks. it makes sense, it still does, i could feel it in my brain, even if you couldn’t tell on the outside. but then i started to have tremors. and shakiness & excessive sweating & fast heart rate. all the same things that are associated with the physical side of panic attack, but i wasn’t panicking when the physical symptoms started. i started to though, when i realized i couldn’t stop shaking. which came first? the chicken or the egg? the tremors or the anxiety? the POTS or the anxiety disorder?
my hands are almost always cold. my feet are too. sometimes when i go outside in the winter my legs will take on the cold too, and from my foot to my hip my skin will feel eerily cold to the touch, and it will for hours. in the summer i go outside & i feel sick. i feel nauseous & small & exhausted & weak. i can’t be outside for too long without feeling like i’m barely getting myself to function. i don’t go outside very much in the summer.
my stomach is always fucked up. i was diagnosed with IBS at 14 because i had reoccurring excruciating stomach cramps & flare-ups of constipation. i get heart burn and nausea and bloating almost daily. i have stomach aches sometimes that interferes with my ability to stand and do the things i need to do.
it makes sense. all the symptoms make sense. i have almost everything, minus the fainting. i’ve only fainted once. i have risk factors- i’ve had mono, i’ve had covid, i have EDS, im a young female.
but i don’t feel sick enough.
& what if it’s something else? another type of dysautonomia? orthostatic cerebral hypoperfusion syndrome? orthostatic hypotension? MCAS? what if it is just physical deconditioning? something else?
how do i know what i have? all i know is i feel like shit.
submitted by cheersneanderthal to POTS [link] [comments]
i’ve been exhausted my whole life. i am almost constantly fatigued. like the kind of chronic tired where i can regularly sleep for 14 hours straight no problem. where even if i’m consistently getting 8 hours everyday i still need a scary amount of coffee to do basic level function. most days i don’t function very well at all. my brain is constantly foggy. i forget things constantly. i lose my wallet & keys & debit card weekly. i literally can’t think straight most of the time, and everything’s kinda blurry in my head. when i stand up i usually feel like i’m going to faint, but i never do, so for the longest time i pinned this on me being weak, out of shape, lazy, some kind of personal failure. sometimes my vision gets blurry too, or my heart rate goes up to where it’s not in a normal range anymore. i feel lightheaded, woozy, off balance. and even though it was hard to think before, it just got a lot harder. i feel like i need to sit as much as i can. if i have to stand for more than a few minutes, i can feel the energy leave my body. it feels like the bottom half of me is deadweight, and the top half of me is giving everything it can to make sure the bottom doesn’t fall down. that’s why my chest and head feel so weak. i have bad posture, because it feels too hard & draining to properly support my torso & head. i slouch really badly to ease the burden. when i was younger i went to physical therapy for it. they thought i had scoliosis. i later found out i have hyper mobile EDS. this made sense. but no one else thought to look for POTS too. i lean against everything i can. i cross my legs to help make myself more sturdy. when i shower i sit on the floor. my feet turn red or purple when i stand for a long time. i can’t stand straight up, feet flat on the floor, legs uncrossed, back straightened without feeling like shit. that makes me feel small & defunct & like i’m not trying. how can someone be trying when they have to crumple themselves up just to remain upright. i work a job where i have to stand all day. i fuck things up a lot because my brain is cloudy and my body feels sick. i have to sit down throughout the shift and feel guilty for not being productive. when i clock out i am overcome with exhaustion. i sit in my car for 40 minutes sometimes before i can get myself to drive home. when i get home, i usually spend the rest of the night in bed. i can’t cook, i can’t clean, i can’t hang out with people. i’m too tired.
for years i thought it was because i spent so much time in bed. i didn’t exercise enough. i’m so lazy that i’ve reduced my body’s ability to function. if i was in shape, if i was more active, standing wouldn’t feel so bad. but when i tried to be more active, to exercise, to get out of bed- i caused muscle edema, i experienced asthma, i over stretched muscles & pulled things out of place & made the lightheaded feeling worse. i exhausted myself to the point of being bed-ridden for the rest of the day, or days, enough time to off-set any progress i made from trying to be active. i felt like i caused a problem and messed myself up so badly i wouldn’t be able to fix it. turns out the problem wasn’t my fault after all. i wasn’t lazy, or at least not by choice. i didn’t sit in bed all day and ruin myself, i sat in bed all day because it drained me not to. i have imposter syndrome & guilt.
when i was younger i developed an anxiety disorder. i had panic attacks. it makes sense, it still does, i could feel it in my brain, even if you couldn’t tell on the outside. but then i started to have tremors. and shakiness & excessive sweating & fast heart rate. all the same things that are associated with the physical side of panic attack, but i wasn’t panicking when the physical symptoms started. i started to though, when i realized i couldn’t stop shaking. which came first? the chicken or the egg? the tremors or the anxiety? the POTS or the anxiety disorder?
my hands are almost always cold. my feet are too. sometimes when i go outside in the winter my legs will take on the cold too, and from my foot to my hip my skin will feel eerily cold to the touch, and it will for hours. in the summer i go outside & i feel sick. i feel nauseous & small & exhausted & weak. i can’t be outside for too long without feeling like i’m barely getting myself to function. i don’t go outside very much in the summer.
my stomach is always fucked up. i was diagnosed with IBS at 14 because i had reoccurring excruciating stomach cramps & flare-ups of constipation. i get heart burn and nausea and bloating almost daily. i have stomach aches sometimes that interferes with my ability to stand and do the things i need to do.
it makes sense. all the symptoms make sense. i have almost everything, minus the fainting. i’ve only fainted once. i have risk factors- i’ve had mono, i’ve had covid, i have EDS, im a young female.
but i don’t feel sick enough.
& what if it’s something else? another type of dysautonomia? orthostatic cerebral hypoperfusion syndrome? orthostatic hypotension? MCAS? what if it is just physical deconditioning? something else?
how do i know what i have? all i know is i feel like shit.
2024.05.16 06:33 Competitive_Ad_2648 Characters now scales how evil they are. How much would be powerful this character? (Things he did is in post)
 | He's fictional version of Sheitan from Turkish TV Series called "Şeytan" (Sheitan in Turkish). submitted by Competitive_Ad_2648 to PowerScaling [link] [comments] Sheitan is basically Satan of my religion (Islam). Here's list: BEFORE THE SERIES AND OVERALL OF THE SERIES ⦁ By not prostrating to Prophet Adam (a.s.) and Prophet Eve (a.s.), he arrogantly declared that he was superior to them and all humanity. ⦁ He constantly says that he's a test for humanity. But do not think that it was created that way. He wanted to be like that. ⦁ Although he knows that he will go to Hell, due to his arrogance and to show Allah (swt) that he can bind people to himself and lead them to evil paths, he leads people astray, leads them to evil and irreligion, tries to be the owner of people and drags them to Hell, the place of eternal pain. ⦁ Throughout the series, children and adults, usually children, catch a whiff of it. This scent is implied to be a physical manifestation of his sins. ⦁ He takes great pleasure in dragging people into evil and Hell. ⦁ He suffers when he hears the name of Allah (swt) mentioned and sees goodness. In short, the guy can't stand these two things. ⦁ He usually calls people Adam or Eve, showing that he sees them all the same. ⦁ He makes fun of humanity. ⦁ He constantly stalks the main characters. ⦁ He trespasses too many places. ⦁ At the end of the episodes, he usually addresses the main characters and says, "I am your test. I will come again." He clearly states that he will not leave them. ⦁ The sections below are just a sampling of what they do. ⦁ Sometimes people's hands burn while holding them. ⦁ He gets very angry when he doesn't get what he wants. ⦁ He hates love. ⦁ He makes evil laugh. ⦁ He enjoyed everything he caused. EPISODE 1 ⦁ After giving money to Oktay with the agreement, the TV in the background tells the story of the loss of the money donated for children, which was the same amount as the money given with the agreement. This implies that Sheitan stole the donation and gave it to Oktay. ⦁ He sends another businessman, with whom he made a deal, to give evil advices to Oktay. This succeeds and Oktay begins to commit corruption. ⦁ He indirectly caused Oktay to oppress the weak, bribe and send death threats. And he enjoys it very much. ⦁ He asks Oktay to take his younger son Egemen as per the agreement. ⦁ He enters Oktay's dreams and tortures him psychologically by showing him terrible things. ⦁ To get Egemen, he threatens to bankrupt Oktay's company by tampering with his bank transactions. ⦁ While he was on the road, he came across a child crying because he was hungry. He tries to deceive him with food to become his owner, but fails. ⦁ While talking to Oktay in a cafe, he psychologically abuses him by showing him a child being shot to death in his dream. ⦁ He scares a nanny into kidnapping Egemen. ⦁ After training Egemen for 15 years to be what he wants, he sends him to kill his father, Oktay. But this fails when Oktay makes Egemen recite the basmala. EPISODE 2 ⦁ While Ece was driving with her newlywed husband, the car broke down. Later, while they're hanging out outside, a truck pulls up. Her husband narrowly saves Ece, but he falls into a coma. Sheitan's attitude at that moment implies, at least for me, that he ruined the car to cause the accident to happen. ⦁ He enters the husband's dreams and tells him that he will wake him up from his coma in exchange for him giving up his "heart" (which probably means giving up being a good person and becoming a bad person). This won't happen because Ece always comes. ⦁ Therefore, in order to deter Ece, he first comes to Ece as an old man and tries to dissuade Ece from coming to her husband, but it does not work. ⦁ He then makes a deal with another man. According to the agreement, he will teach the man how to have relationships with women, and the man will direct Ece to cheat on her husband with him, thus enabling her to move away from her husband. ⦁ He constantly verbally harasses Ece's husband until the night he manipulates him into cheating on her. ⦁ Once, he even tries to deceive husband by showing him something unreal, a scene in which Ece is having fun with the man she made a deal with, and Ece has not yet established a full relationship with that man. But Allah (swt) solves the situation at that moment by sending Ece's voice to the husband. ⦁ Finally, when Ece cheats on her husband, he reveals it to husband, bringing him to a psychological breaking point. He then encouraged violence against the woman by saying things to her such as "Say yes, give your heart and teach that woman a lesson.". When the Quran is read at that moment, things go wrong. Finally Sheitan kills the man. Allah (swt) resurrects the man, but this does not alleviate what Sheitan has done. ⦁ Finally, he encourages Ece, who was preparing to commit suicide, even more, but this does not work either when Ece's husband arrives. EPISODE 3 ⦁ He decided to disperse a family because they teach their children about Surah Nas and Islam. ⦁ He allies with mother Amine's friend Afet. Afet constantly tells Amine that her husband may be cheating on her, sowing the seed of doubt in Amine. ⦁ While Amine and her children were at the dinner table, she appeared to the little boy on the balcony and made him cry out of fear. This cry becomes the breaking point for Amine, whose psychology deteriorates because the seeds of doubt are planted in her, and she hits the little boy. As a result, Sheitan indirectly causes child abuse. ⦁ As a detective, he secretly follows Amine's husband and takes a photo of him holding a woman as she falls, and then gives it to Amine. Amine, whose perception is already distorted due to the doubt inside her, sees this as proof that her husband is cheating on her and takes the children and leaves her husband. While leaving her husband, she insults him and he slaps her. In other words, Afet and Sheitanboth separated husband and wife and indirectly caused violence against women. ⦁ Afet comes to Amine's husband and tells him to cheat on her in exchange for Amine's abandonment. This is probably the work of Sheitan. ⦁ He and Afet almost caused the family to break up. ⦁ He said he loved Afet. But that was probably because she was so bad like him. ⦁ When things start to turn out the opposite of what he wants, he threatens Afet to fix the situation. This situation causes Afet to die in a car accident. EPISODE 4 ⦁ After luring Emin with money when he was a child, he scared Emin by showing him himself, giving him a trauma that would cause him to have nightmares until adulthood. He probably did it for pleasure. ⦁ Just to encourage Emin to steal money, he got into the same job as Emin and encouraged him to steal money. Like, in most of the episode. And he succeeds in this. ⦁ Emin's wife says that when she saw him, she felt as if she had seen him before. Considering the wife's fondness for illicit money, this may imply that Sheitan is the reason for her becoming this way. ⦁ He referred to the donation of food used for orphans as "using the mind". ⦁ While Emin was psychologically at the bottom, he took advantage of his situation and tried to make him see himself as his master. And also because he makes corrupt people call him master, he makes them live in luxury and makes sure no one calls them thieves. EPISODE 5 ⦁ He scared the girl and caused the Zeynep to have an asthma attack. ⦁ To provoke the mother-in-law of Zeynep, he disguised himself as a old lady neighbor and told her fake stories, such as her being thrown out of the house by her daughter-in-law. He also tried to convince the mother-in-law that her son was paying attention to his daughter-in-law instead of her. And he succeeds in this for a while. ⦁ He makes Zeynep's friend beautiful enough to make men fall in love with her as her slaves, so that she can confuse men's minds and fill them with lust. He also uses her to handle his gaslighting with the Zeynep's mother-in-law. ⦁ He was trying to stop Zeynep's aunt by whispering because she was an obstacle to his work. ⦁ In one scene, while Zeynep is directly next to her husband and the mother-in-law is listening a little away, Sheitanleans next to her and Zeynep directly says bad things about the mother-in-law. The next scene was directly between Zeynep and her husband and they were normal. My guess is that Sheitan played with the mother-in-law's mind. ⦁ In order to separate Zeynep and her husband, the mother-in-law and he makes a potion with a witch. Once the husband drinks this potion, he will immediately hate his wife the next day. This potion is useless as it spills. ⦁ She encourages the mother-in-law to separate her son and Zeynep. The mother-in-law ruined her son's clothes by scratching them so that her son and Zeynep could separate, and slandered Zeynep about cheating. ⦁ He persuades the mother-in-law to slander Zeynep. And it works for a while but aunt fixes everything. ⦁ He almost caused the family to break up. ⦁ He made the mother-in-law a bad person. And this mother-in-law had taken her son from the bad way at the beginning of the episode. ⦁ He exposes the mother-in-law for what she did to her son and causes the mother-in-law to be kicked out of the house. ⦁ When the mother-in-law starts going to the sea to commit suicide, he takes pleasure in it. He hates it when Zeynep saves the mother-in-law. EPISODE 6 ⦁ He helped Bahar separate Fazıl, an old man, from his wife, tie him to her, and almost take over the company. After scaring her, of course. ⦁ As plan B, Bahar kill Fazıl's wife by dropping her and Sheitan helps her. Sheitan tastes the blood of the dead woman. Fazıl covers up the incident by saying that it was a suicide. ⦁ He tries to get her to cause an accident to stop a police officer investigating the murder. ⦁ While Fazıl's daughter was crying, he secretly made fun of her. ⦁ He convinces Bahar to kill Fazıl's son. He leaves Bahar just as the police arrive. Fazıl's son does not die. EPISODE 7 ⦁ He drops money on the road, causing two close friends to fight each other for gold. He tries to do the same thing to children, but it doesn't work because children are pure good. When it doesn't work, he vanishes the gold. ⦁ He tries to lead Adam, who is pure good, into a bad path and tie him to himself and become his master. ⦁ For this reason, he first tries to become his assistant, but fails. He then decides to corrupt her with love. For this, He gives a disease to a woman named Eva (only her name is foreign and she is Turkish) with the magic on the shoe. ⦁ He arranges for Eva to be sent to Adem's hospital for surgery by Adem. There he makes Adam fall in love with Eva. He then tries to get him closer to Eva. ⦁ He calls someone a fool for giving him his money. ⦁ He tries to impose on her the state of love corrupted by lust and desire. ⦁ Later, after giving Eva an illness, he kidnaps her to Adem's house, telling her father, with whom he is friends, that he will take her to the clinic. ⦁ He gives him a knife to keep Eva at home. ⦁ He causes Adam to seemingly "attempt to rape and murder" Eva and "go down the wrong path". And he called him "True Lover" because of that. ⦁ He makes an offer to Adam, who regrets what he did: If he kisses her hand (which means he becomes her master), he can destroy the corpse, make other women fall in love with him, and even resurrect Eva. Just as Adem was about to kiss his hand, Eva's guards arrived, so no deal could be made. At that moment, Sheitanexposes Adam, causing him to be "shot to death." ⦁ When he returned to Istanbul 10 years later, while reading the news of war, murder, hunger, unemployment and terrorism in the newspaper, he laughed and thought that its smell had spread throughout the city, in short, the whole city was mired in sin. ⦁ Later, when he learns that Adem and Eva's "death" was actually a trap made for him and that the duo did not die but became parents, he goes crazy. ⦁ He then tells the duo that he will follow them both constantly and will take over the Earth and humanity. EPISODE 8 ⦁ He plans to use a new discovery regarding stem cells to turn humanity into freak creatures. ⦁ In order to steal the formulas, he disguises himself as the university principal and asks for the formulas, but it does not work. ⦁ He whispers to a security guard not to let the mother of the Ayşe, who finded the formula, in because she was wearing a headscarf (I think that part is about Hijab Ban. For those who don't know, there were bans on wearing Hijabs in Turkiye at that time). ⦁ He encourages Ayşe's father-in-law to take the formulas with him. ⦁ They knock Ayşe unconscious and kidnap Ayşe's husband and ask for the formulas in return for her husband. And they do this while Ayşe is pregnant. ⦁ When Ayşe's brother goes to save Ayşe's husband, he scares him, causing his location to be revealed and him being taken as a hostage. ⦁ As Plan B, he tries to have Ayşe's father-in-law kill Ayşe, Ayşe's husband and Ayşe's brother. But at that moment, the father-in-law probably gives up because of the effect of the adhan recited at that moment. EPISODE 9 ⦁ In the first minute, he causes a father to have a car accident and die by making him look at his phone while in the car. ⦁ He puts misgivings and doubts in the mind of the dead man's wife about the factory partnership. ⦁ He whispers to Cengiz Bey that he should not give deceased man's, who is Cengiz's brother, son the factory when he turns 18. And he succeeds. ⦁ He whispers to provoke Cengiz's wife against the dead man's wife. ⦁ He whispers to Cengiz's wife to try to prevent money from being given to the dead man's wife. ⦁ He drags Cengiz down a bad path. He makes him selfish and bad guy. ⦁ He showed Cengiz's wife as if she was in a car accident. ⦁ He comes to Cengiz as a businessman who controls all the countries and establishes a partnership with him. Later, he smuggles drugs with him. ⦁ Cengiz's brother's son, who has a right to work in that factory, verbally abused him while he was mentally destroyed, saying that no one loved him. This caused the child to hit the glass with his hand, injuring his hand, and to turn into a problematic person within 4 years. ⦁ He whispers to the dead man's son to kill Cengiz. But the dead man's wife prevents her son from killing Genghis. EPISODE 10 ⦁ He decides to break Şükran's relationship and take her heart, which probably means taking the goodness out of her. ⦁ He takes over a girl's body and hits the cabinets with it until her hands bleed, insults Şükran and causes a mental breakdown in that girl he taked over. ⦁ It brings gratitude into dreams. He then psychologically tortured her by chasing her and posing as her lover in her dreams . ⦁ He watched as Hülya undressed and changed... While watching, she said "Ooh. Tsk Tsk Tsk." It made sounds like... ⦁ Looks like he made a deal with Hülya. According to the agreement, he will give Hülya beauty and attracting men. He would also receive his debt later. He asks him to help him with his business with Şükran to pay off his debt. He also physically and mentally abused her by calling her ugly and pressing her face against the glass. You can understand from Hülya's reactions that it has a great impact on him. ⦁ He exploits Şükran's fear that something will happen to her mother, who has a heart problem. Shows nightmares about it. ⦁ He threatens Hülya by holding her out the window to make her hurry up. ⦁ Hülya moves from studying with Şükran's boyfriend to caressing her head. While Sheitanconvinces Şükran that she needs money to go home for her mother, he suddenly decides to direct her to Hülya. When Şükran goes to her boyfriend's house, she sees Hülya caressing his head. When he sees that Beloved is cheating on him, he breaks up with her. ⦁ He tells Hülya to leave Şükran completely alone. Hülya calls Şükran's friend to "hitchhike to Izmir". ⦁ It suppresses Şükran's mother's heart and causes a lot of discomfort. Considering the pacing of that scene, he was probably trying to kill her or at least do her some harm. ⦁ When a car arrives and Hülya gets into it, Sheitanwhispers to Şükran's friend to get into that car. Then Hülya leaves the car and abandons her, and the men kidnap her. The wounds on her body and her reactions show that the men who kidnapped her did very bad things to her. ⦁ He secretly directs Şükran to be a babysitter at a house. Şükran comes to her while she is babysitting and shows her a fake proof that her mother is in a hospital. He then says that there is only one solution for humanity and that he can solve the problem in exchange for his heart. Later, when the owner comes, he tells her to tell owner that she wants to go. Şükran does this by threatening her with the vase. He then takes her hitchhiking in a car and tries to do the same thing to her that happened to his friend. Fortunately, Şükran quickly resolves the situation, gets out of the car and confronts Satan. EPISODE 11 ⦁ To ensure that vendetta continues and Yusuf or Ahmet's wife shoot Osman, he tells Ahmet's wife that he will give Osman's, who now lives a normal life with his sisters after changing his surname, location in exchange for her coming as a friend of Ahmet and convincing Yusuf, who is Ahmet's son, to shoot Osman, that have a father who shot Ahmet out of vendetta. ⦁ When Yusuf, tired of the nightmares he sees, decides to kill Osman, Sheitantells Ahmet's wife that Osman is in Istanbul. And Yusuf goes to Istanbul. ⦁ He later helps Yusuf continue his feud by things like giving him a house. For some reason, he places Yusuf in the house near Osman's house. I don't know why he did this, but he must have had a bad reason because... We're talking about the devil, he's probably planning something. ⦁ He drops Cemile's ,One of Osman's sisters, the bag in her hand and compares with Yusuf, whom she loved as a child but cannot recognize now, so he can find Osman but it accidently makes Yusuf fall in love with her again. ⦁ Yusuf gives up his blood feud after falling in love. For this reason, he tells Ahmet's wife that his son Yusuf left his blood feud and is in a relationship with Osman's sister Cemile. Ahmet's wife then decides to go to Istanbul with Sheitan, who disguised as Ahmet's friend, and meet with Yusuf, or to shoot Osman herself. ⦁ He disguises herself as his mother and goes to Yusuf and speaks like Yusuf's mother. ⦁ While talking to Ahmet's wife, when Ahmet's wife wonders about being called "Hevva", he forces him to sleep. He did this on the bus too. ⦁ He crushes a flower too much with a shoe while talking about continuing their feud and causing bloodshed. ⦁ He encourages Ahmet's wife to shoot Osman. This causes Ahmet's wife to shoot Yusuf, her own son, while trying to shoot Osman and stay in prison for a long time. Fortunately, Yusuf recovered, married Cemile and forgave his mother. EPISODE 12 ⦁ He goes to Ayla Bacı, a fortune teller, and shows her people burying their father's body, he goes there and gives someone the chills. Then it comes back. Then he asks the fortune teller to help him bind people to him. The fortune teller also accepts. ⦁ He whispers to Cemal, who is so fond of wordly goods that he cares about them instead of his father-in-law, to increase this fondness in him. ⦁ He enters the house of Cemal. Then he makes him leave his money under the board and makes him forget what he did. ⦁ He whispers to Cemal to make it seem as if Yakup, who is Cemal's brother who wanted money for buying a farm, will take over all of Cemal's money. Then he whispers to Yakup but it doesn't work. ⦁ He stops the heart of the man, who gave Yakup enough money to pay for farm in exchange for tobacco, just because he gived enough money for farm to Yahup. And he makes a evil laugh af |
2024.05.16 06:30 Inner_Lengthiness697 Simple college essay writing tool → $50k MRR
From 0 to 100 million+ impressions, 800k+ users, and $50k MRR, in a span of 6 months.
Declan and Derrick were undergrads at UC Berkeley and loved building side projects — Avo Alaram, YouUp, and Steady Soles to name a few.
One of their friends suggested they to focus on a single project and they chose JotBot — an AI essay generator that used writing samples to write like you which they built in a week.
Due to the nature and target Audience of the project, the most obvious marketing channel to go with is Titkok and they did the same. Committed to posting 6–10 short-form videos, every single day, on 3 platforms (Reels, TikTok, Shorts), advertising our product, but nothing worked.
After a lot of failed short-form content, they had a fun idea to get a super long and specific URL like ‘idontwanttodomyessay .com‘ and redirect it to their site, and it worked like a charm.
Here are some of their Tiktok templates (3.2m, 10m, 8.9m) which worked for them, they remade it, it worked again and even other products copied it and it worked for them too (you can use them too).
This pushed them to $25k MRR, but they didn’t want to look like a cheating app that students used and forgot about. Recently they pivoted again to a Research copilot and again with the same set of template with some changes pushing the MRR to $50k.
TikTok is a great marketing channel for B2C products, Trendy and Shareable Products. In the Umax story that we shared last week ($6m ARR), Tiktok was one of their main marketing channel too.
To read more such tips and stories around building on the Internet, consider subscribing to our free Newsletter BuilderOS :)
submitted by Inner_Lengthiness697 to SaaS [link] [comments]
Declan and Derrick were undergrads at UC Berkeley and loved building side projects — Avo Alaram, YouUp, and Steady Soles to name a few.
One of their friends suggested they to focus on a single project and they chose JotBot — an AI essay generator that used writing samples to write like you which they built in a week.
Due to the nature and target Audience of the project, the most obvious marketing channel to go with is Titkok and they did the same. Committed to posting 6–10 short-form videos, every single day, on 3 platforms (Reels, TikTok, Shorts), advertising our product, but nothing worked.
After a lot of failed short-form content, they had a fun idea to get a super long and specific URL like ‘idontwanttodomyessay .com‘ and redirect it to their site, and it worked like a charm.
Here are some of their Tiktok templates (3.2m, 10m, 8.9m) which worked for them, they remade it, it worked again and even other products copied it and it worked for them too (you can use them too).
This pushed them to $25k MRR, but they didn’t want to look like a cheating app that students used and forgot about. Recently they pivoted again to a Research copilot and again with the same set of template with some changes pushing the MRR to $50k.
TikTok is a great marketing channel for B2C products, Trendy and Shareable Products. In the Umax story that we shared last week ($6m ARR), Tiktok was one of their main marketing channel too.
2024.05.16 06:30 rhimae11 need advice about neighbors dog…
neighbors dog stays on balcony barking day & night + urinating directly onto balcony.
I live in the Plateau and my neighbor in the apartment right next to mine has a dog (a doberman) that is on his balcony most of the day and night (we both live on the 3rd/top floor). The door to his balcony seems to be open all the time so the dog can go in and out. It is barking all the time…at everyone and anything that moves.
what is even worse, is it pees on the balcony too (there are no pee pads or anything on the balcony either, i witnessed the dog peeing and the urine just drips down to the balcony below it which is disgusting). I have never once seen the owner take it out for a pee or a walk.
I’m worried about the dogs well being, not just being annoyed at the constant barking or disgusting urine.
I was coming home one day last week when the dog was barking its head off at me, and everyone on the street was staring… the owner (my neighbor, a ~50 something year old man) came out on the balcony and I tried to politely mention (all the way from the street, but didn’t want to cause a scene as there were people around) how the dog is always out there barking, and he said: “she’s just a baby. i don’t put her out here, she just comes out here on her own.” and i said “ok, but you’re the one leaving your balcony door open 24/7.. I work from home and it’s quite loud and i also hear her at night barking at things outside.” I didn’t stick around for his response as i wasn’t about to get into an argument with this man (he doesn’t seem the friendliest).
The barking is driving me crazy. I’m writing this at almost 12:30am while i hear the dog out there barking at something on the street.
I would like to know: - Has anyone else encountered something similar before? - What can I do about this? - How much evidence (photos/videos) would i need to file a complaint to the SPCA or the city? - Would the city just advise me to phone the police? (which i don’t want to do).
Any advice helps. My French is a work in progress so that part worries me as well if it comes to me making some sort of formal complaint somewhere.
merci d'avance!
submitted by rhimae11 to montreal [link] [comments]
I live in the Plateau and my neighbor in the apartment right next to mine has a dog (a doberman) that is on his balcony most of the day and night (we both live on the 3rd/top floor). The door to his balcony seems to be open all the time so the dog can go in and out. It is barking all the time…at everyone and anything that moves.
what is even worse, is it pees on the balcony too (there are no pee pads or anything on the balcony either, i witnessed the dog peeing and the urine just drips down to the balcony below it which is disgusting). I have never once seen the owner take it out for a pee or a walk.
I’m worried about the dogs well being, not just being annoyed at the constant barking or disgusting urine.
I was coming home one day last week when the dog was barking its head off at me, and everyone on the street was staring… the owner (my neighbor, a ~50 something year old man) came out on the balcony and I tried to politely mention (all the way from the street, but didn’t want to cause a scene as there were people around) how the dog is always out there barking, and he said: “she’s just a baby. i don’t put her out here, she just comes out here on her own.” and i said “ok, but you’re the one leaving your balcony door open 24/7.. I work from home and it’s quite loud and i also hear her at night barking at things outside.” I didn’t stick around for his response as i wasn’t about to get into an argument with this man (he doesn’t seem the friendliest).
The barking is driving me crazy. I’m writing this at almost 12:30am while i hear the dog out there barking at something on the street.
I would like to know: - Has anyone else encountered something similar before? - What can I do about this? - How much evidence (photos/videos) would i need to file a complaint to the SPCA or the city? - Would the city just advise me to phone the police? (which i don’t want to do).
Any advice helps. My French is a work in progress so that part worries me as well if it comes to me making some sort of formal complaint somewhere.
merci d'avance!
2024.05.16 06:17 goodwillmarinelli strong belief that I am autistic; mom doesn't/won't believe me
I have a strong belief that I am autistic. I have autistic friends and they agree with me. I've taken almost all of the online questionnaires and screenings and every. single. one. is on the much higher end. I taken them multiple times, and every time I say to myself "this time you're gonna be completely honest. Really think on each question. Don't exaggerate" and I just get the same if not a higher score than the last time I took it. I know those screenings aren't a definitive, especially for those who are autistic but have more nuanced traits that those questions wouldn't necessarily flag. But considering how consistent, and "stereotypical", for lack of a better word, my answers are, I think its a safe bet to think that it's pretty likely.
I didn't display the usual milestone stuff associated with autism when I was little. What makes this harder specifically with my mom is that I hit developmental milestones early, and was said to be very bright child from the start by most people around me. Noticeably intelligent/"high IQ" etc. but not some sort of young sheldon savant.
It's pretty easy, or at least easier, for me to look back on experiences or how I socialised when I was younger and realise "hey that was probably another indicator that was overlooked", but for my mom there was a lot of stuff, particularly school, that she just wasn't around for and couldn't see like I could. There are some things/stories that "we" (mostly her. I don't remember a ton of early school days other than super profound moments or instances that for whatever reason had a lasting impact emotionally) look back on that when put in the context of possible autism, make a lot more sense. She's told me a bunch about a time where this girl at school (kindergarten I think) refused to talk to me, like I would try and say something to her and she just looked at me and/or completely ignored me. So I kicked her. I was not a violent child, there are a few instances where I got physical with people but, again, looking back I dont think I understood the gravity of my actions. I kept getting drawn to kicking peers. In 80% of cases I did it during recess as some sort of "play" even though now I obviously know that it was harmful and I still feel bad. There were a couple of times someone behind me in line kept stepping on my heel and I had enough so I'd kick them. I think I definitely showed signs as a child but it doesn't help that the most difficult symptoms haven't become prominent until about age 12.
Anyway there are a lot of things like that. More-so things that my mom has always passed off as being because I was a bright or "gifted" kid. The times I've brought up the possibility of autism to her I'm always met with "symptoms of autism are commonly found in gifted kids but that doesn't mean you're autistic" re: feeling disconnected from peers & unable to find common ground etc etc. Either that or it's stuff that she did as a kid too. We both have diagnosed ADD.
I wouldn't feel as much of an intense need for a "real" diagnosis if it wasn't for how I think my autistic traits are affecting our relationship. Ever since I was a kid I'd be yelled at for "sass" or "backtalk". I heard that I was "sassing off" so much that just the word "sass" triggers an intense internal emotional reaction. I never understood what that meant. I would ask, she would kind of explain, but I'd never actually get it. This is the same thing now, except now without my dad here (passed away) it's just us and I feel like I've sort of unintentionally become part of a partnership dynamic rather parent and child (which is confusing as hell sometimes because it's like you're equal, being part of adult conversations and decisions as an adult partner would, and yet held to the same expectations and rules that of a child). There are a lot of times where she's says something like "watch your tone", "stop/you don't have to talk/treat/speak to me this way", "stop yelling at me" with her getting hurt or mad and I rarely, truly understand what exactly I did. Ill ask her "how did I just speak to you" and I feel like she when she repeats it back her tone is exaggerating how I sounded, but then again I don't actually know how I sounded. All I know is that I didn't intend to be mean or disrespectful. I never mean to be disrespectful. If something happens where I did something or haven't been doing something (its a reoccurring breaking point when shes been asking me to do something for weeks and I just don't do it. Unloading the dishwasher specifically. I come home exhausted from school and I just come home, eat something, and then go sit in my room on my laptop for the rest of the night between homework and leisure.) and I just shut down and sit there silently without eye contact until she stops yelling and the interaction kind of "ends" and either she or I walk away to another room alone. I know how it makes her feel and I feel so bad about it, just in the moment there are things in my head that I want to say but its like I cant get them to come out. She sees this as me "stonewalling" her and "refusing to take responsibility". Some arguments she's called me "abusive" for my behaviour, and I can't say I blame her. I know how my behaviour comes across on the outside. To her, I don't listen or do anything around the house, I'm unnecessarily mean and disrespectful most of the time, I talk back and raise my voice a lot. Theres more I cant remember right now. Its more prominent because I don't really act like that around my friends, it's just at home. Its not like its personal to her, I just come home and I guess "unmask."
I wish I could just go to my doctor and say I'm fairly certain I'm on the spectrum and get a referral, and get a diagnosis (in my state autism diagnoses and treatment are required to be covered by insurance if youre under 21) or some other explanation for why I'm like this, and come back to her with something that proves that I don't hate her and I'm not some abusive asshole that likes being a dick. Every time I've brought up autism it gets mostly shut down or passed off as something else or just par of the course for being "gifted". It does not help that she feels that people right now are too quick to jump on the thought they're autistic. I feel like I need a diagnosis, autism or whatever else, in order to save us being able to exist in the same house without me feeling I have to have my guards up and without her feeling like I despise her being around me and that I want nothing to do with her. I am very close to typing up a document with many of the feelings I've written here along with experiences and reasons why I think I'm autistic, along with all of my self assessment scores and answers with explanations for each. I guess I've just hoped I'd be able to do that with a professional there to guide it also but It's just getting to hard to deal with with this hypothetical ideal examination of how my brain works. I guess I'm just on edge and ready for her to dismiss every point I bring up in some way or another or say "what? you weren't like that as a kid".
I didn't mean to go off like this, I appreciate anyone who's read this far. The whole thing just hurts.
submitted by goodwillmarinelli to autism [link] [comments]
I didn't display the usual milestone stuff associated with autism when I was little. What makes this harder specifically with my mom is that I hit developmental milestones early, and was said to be very bright child from the start by most people around me. Noticeably intelligent/"high IQ" etc. but not some sort of young sheldon savant.
It's pretty easy, or at least easier, for me to look back on experiences or how I socialised when I was younger and realise "hey that was probably another indicator that was overlooked", but for my mom there was a lot of stuff, particularly school, that she just wasn't around for and couldn't see like I could. There are some things/stories that "we" (mostly her. I don't remember a ton of early school days other than super profound moments or instances that for whatever reason had a lasting impact emotionally) look back on that when put in the context of possible autism, make a lot more sense. She's told me a bunch about a time where this girl at school (kindergarten I think) refused to talk to me, like I would try and say something to her and she just looked at me and/or completely ignored me. So I kicked her. I was not a violent child, there are a few instances where I got physical with people but, again, looking back I dont think I understood the gravity of my actions. I kept getting drawn to kicking peers. In 80% of cases I did it during recess as some sort of "play" even though now I obviously know that it was harmful and I still feel bad. There were a couple of times someone behind me in line kept stepping on my heel and I had enough so I'd kick them. I think I definitely showed signs as a child but it doesn't help that the most difficult symptoms haven't become prominent until about age 12.
Anyway there are a lot of things like that. More-so things that my mom has always passed off as being because I was a bright or "gifted" kid. The times I've brought up the possibility of autism to her I'm always met with "symptoms of autism are commonly found in gifted kids but that doesn't mean you're autistic" re: feeling disconnected from peers & unable to find common ground etc etc. Either that or it's stuff that she did as a kid too. We both have diagnosed ADD.
I wouldn't feel as much of an intense need for a "real" diagnosis if it wasn't for how I think my autistic traits are affecting our relationship. Ever since I was a kid I'd be yelled at for "sass" or "backtalk". I heard that I was "sassing off" so much that just the word "sass" triggers an intense internal emotional reaction. I never understood what that meant. I would ask, she would kind of explain, but I'd never actually get it. This is the same thing now, except now without my dad here (passed away) it's just us and I feel like I've sort of unintentionally become part of a partnership dynamic rather parent and child (which is confusing as hell sometimes because it's like you're equal, being part of adult conversations and decisions as an adult partner would, and yet held to the same expectations and rules that of a child). There are a lot of times where she's says something like "watch your tone", "stop/you don't have to talk/treat/speak to me this way", "stop yelling at me" with her getting hurt or mad and I rarely, truly understand what exactly I did. Ill ask her "how did I just speak to you" and I feel like she when she repeats it back her tone is exaggerating how I sounded, but then again I don't actually know how I sounded. All I know is that I didn't intend to be mean or disrespectful. I never mean to be disrespectful. If something happens where I did something or haven't been doing something (its a reoccurring breaking point when shes been asking me to do something for weeks and I just don't do it. Unloading the dishwasher specifically. I come home exhausted from school and I just come home, eat something, and then go sit in my room on my laptop for the rest of the night between homework and leisure.) and I just shut down and sit there silently without eye contact until she stops yelling and the interaction kind of "ends" and either she or I walk away to another room alone. I know how it makes her feel and I feel so bad about it, just in the moment there are things in my head that I want to say but its like I cant get them to come out. She sees this as me "stonewalling" her and "refusing to take responsibility". Some arguments she's called me "abusive" for my behaviour, and I can't say I blame her. I know how my behaviour comes across on the outside. To her, I don't listen or do anything around the house, I'm unnecessarily mean and disrespectful most of the time, I talk back and raise my voice a lot. Theres more I cant remember right now. Its more prominent because I don't really act like that around my friends, it's just at home. Its not like its personal to her, I just come home and I guess "unmask."
I wish I could just go to my doctor and say I'm fairly certain I'm on the spectrum and get a referral, and get a diagnosis (in my state autism diagnoses and treatment are required to be covered by insurance if youre under 21) or some other explanation for why I'm like this, and come back to her with something that proves that I don't hate her and I'm not some abusive asshole that likes being a dick. Every time I've brought up autism it gets mostly shut down or passed off as something else or just par of the course for being "gifted". It does not help that she feels that people right now are too quick to jump on the thought they're autistic. I feel like I need a diagnosis, autism or whatever else, in order to save us being able to exist in the same house without me feeling I have to have my guards up and without her feeling like I despise her being around me and that I want nothing to do with her. I am very close to typing up a document with many of the feelings I've written here along with experiences and reasons why I think I'm autistic, along with all of my self assessment scores and answers with explanations for each. I guess I've just hoped I'd be able to do that with a professional there to guide it also but It's just getting to hard to deal with with this hypothetical ideal examination of how my brain works. I guess I'm just on edge and ready for her to dismiss every point I bring up in some way or another or say "what? you weren't like that as a kid".
I didn't mean to go off like this, I appreciate anyone who's read this far. The whole thing just hurts.
2024.05.16 06:16 furmama22 What's going on with my face
Since April 26th my left side of my face has been numb. It's not visibly numb or droopy but it is definitely numb compared to my right side- which isn't at all. May 12th I woke to my tongue tingly & very obviously numb. It feels as tho I've been to the dentist. I haven't been since Oct 2023 I call the nurses line they tell me to call 911 because it sounds like a stroke! I dont because that sounds silly, im a 33yo f with kids at home I cant just leave. May 14th was a normal day with the half numb face. But I started to get a migraine out of nowhere. Migraines are something I'm familiar with but never out of the blue like that. I take 2 sumatriptan & pass-out. Today I feel normal, left side of my lips feel more numb than they have whatever but no migraine so I don't go in.
I have been very stressed & anxiety riddled as of late. So I could presume it's that. BUT! June 2023 left side of my face goes numb. I figure it was wind blown from being on the ferry. But it continues to be numb for a month. I was literally the most stress free, happy, no anxiety in years person. Nurse practitioner said it was Shingles. But I didn't have a rash or pain. Just a half numb face. From the left tip of my nose down the back of my scalp, literally the entire half of my head was numb. No other symptoms. My tongue never felt like it does now. I have gotten migraines since 2014 give or take so I couldn't say if they were worse at this time last year.
Wtf is wrong with me?? Waiting to get a CT scan done & to see a neurologist but looking to see if anyone else relates?
submitted by furmama22 to DiagnoseMe [link] [comments]
I have been very stressed & anxiety riddled as of late. So I could presume it's that. BUT! June 2023 left side of my face goes numb. I figure it was wind blown from being on the ferry. But it continues to be numb for a month. I was literally the most stress free, happy, no anxiety in years person. Nurse practitioner said it was Shingles. But I didn't have a rash or pain. Just a half numb face. From the left tip of my nose down the back of my scalp, literally the entire half of my head was numb. No other symptoms. My tongue never felt like it does now. I have gotten migraines since 2014 give or take so I couldn't say if they were worse at this time last year.
Wtf is wrong with me?? Waiting to get a CT scan done & to see a neurologist but looking to see if anyone else relates?
2024.05.16 06:13 maguirre007 [WTS] Pilot Custom 823, Sailor PG black and silver trim, Pilot VP/Vanishing Point black and gold, Sailor PG/Pro Gear black and rhodium trim
Hi all, making another post for some additional pens I need to sell to pay off bills.
There's some more pens still available in my past post here: https://www.reddit.com/Pen_Swap/comments/1csxfbh/wts_leonardo_momento_zero_andromeda_rhodium/
I'm located in Australia so all prices are set in AUD. Worldwide shipping $25 AUD (unless it actually costs me less to ship to your country).
Verification and album
I'll be including some ink samples with every sale!
Here are the pens:
Pilot Custom 823 (M nib) in Amber [B] $280 AUD Just like everyone says, this pen writes like a dream. It's truly one of my favourite pens. The only reason I'm deciding to sell it is because most of the pens I have left in my collection are customs and I have the hope that once I'm in a more financially stable position I'll be able to buy this one again.
Pilot Vanishing Point (F nib) in black and gold [B] $180 AUD I am not a fan of this pen at all unfortunately. It writes too fine for me and I'm not a fan of the clicking mechanism.
Sailor Pro Gear (B 21k rhodium plated nib) in black with rhodium trim [B] $250 AUD This is a really nice pen and it writes beautifully well, just like you'd expect a Sailor to write. It has the more detailed old nib style with '1911' written on it.
Please let me know if you have any questions or if you'd like me to take more pictures or videos, I'd be more than happy to provide them :)
Thank you!
submitted by maguirre007 to Pen_Swap [link] [comments]
There's some more pens still available in my past post here: https://www.reddit.com/Pen_Swap/comments/1csxfbh/wts_leonardo_momento_zero_andromeda_rhodium/
I'm located in Australia so all prices are set in AUD. Worldwide shipping $25 AUD (unless it actually costs me less to ship to your country).
Verification and album
I'll be including some ink samples with every sale!
Here are the pens:
Pilot Custom 823 (M nib) in Amber [B] $280 AUD Just like everyone says, this pen writes like a dream. It's truly one of my favourite pens. The only reason I'm deciding to sell it is because most of the pens I have left in my collection are customs and I have the hope that once I'm in a more financially stable position I'll be able to buy this one again.
Pilot Vanishing Point (F nib) in black and gold [B] $180 AUD I am not a fan of this pen at all unfortunately. It writes too fine for me and I'm not a fan of the clicking mechanism.
Sailor Pro Gear (B 21k rhodium plated nib) in black with rhodium trim [B] $250 AUD This is a really nice pen and it writes beautifully well, just like you'd expect a Sailor to write. It has the more detailed old nib style with '1911' written on it.
Please let me know if you have any questions or if you'd like me to take more pictures or videos, I'd be more than happy to provide them :)
Thank you!