Letting negative people go quotes

Prior to 2024, I was getting good promotion casino offers weekly sometimes even daily. It’s now May 2024 and I kid you not, I’ve gotten 2 or 3 promotions all year and all of them were not worth it (spend $1k get 1k crowns what a joke!). If anyone else is going through a dry spell with casino promos please let me know. Maybe I’m doing something wrong? I don’t understand the lack of casino promotions

So I recently came out as trans and my one and only friend was super supportive of me, she’s trans herself and was extremely happy that I could talk to her about it, yet it started some weird dynamic between us and I think I’ve genuinely fucked the only real friendship I’ve ever had.
We were and still are platonic in every sense of the word, and I never once pictured myself having feelings for her in any way, but since coming out she’s been, somewhat more tender with me and just overall deeper emotionally.
This didn’t cause me to fall in love, I have a bad history with that feeling and I’m a bit numb to the touch due to some thing past trauma, and I have respect for her like I have for no other and I wouldn’t want to do anything to jeopardise our friendship…
However I subconsciously started acting in ways that didn’t seem platonic to her. I sort of attached myself to her like she was my only reason for being alive, I relied on her for everything, I made her feel guilty whenever she felt like she upset me because I would always go quiet trying to make sure I wasn’t annoying her.
In this way I just completely invalidated her feelings, she has gone through a lot herself, and whenever I felt like she was having a bad day I’d immediately assume blame, and I’d just keep interaction to a minimum, this undoubtedly made her feel much worse, and to top it all off I inadvertently made it all about me.
I just drained her mentally to the point where I made her feel like she was walking on thin ice whenever she was around me, I told her that I wasn’t her problem and that she shouldn’t worry about me, but I ended up becoming a massive problem for her.
To make things worse, prior to all this she would poke fun at me saying I was crushing on her, and I couldn’t even tell at the time if this was the truth or not, because I can’t differentiate my feelings of complete and utter loneliness and feelings of actual intimacy toward a person.
I obviously made it very hard for her to differentiate between which one I was truly feeling which created even more problems, because I went with it, it seemed like fun, something to distract myself with, but it turned out it was a huge mistake.
Soon after coming out I grew accustomed to talking higher pitched and in a much more feminine way, it was easy for me to do since I’ve done some voice training in the past, and she would compliment me for it.
She would tell me how nice my voice is, and I would feel special that she said these things to me, and this is where I would admittedly want more attention from her, I enjoyed being complimented by someone I looked up to, it made me feel warm inside and I wanted more.
So I continued, and at some point it got too far, I started to believe the lie that I was in love with her because it was just going so well for me, I mean why stop now? I had everything I wanted.
My best friend was giving me lots of attention and making me feel so happy, that I couldn’t see how much this was actually affecting her.
I let my own personal happiness blind me to walking all over her feelings, she felt responsible for me because of the way I was acting and she didn’t want this to happen, yet I didn’t listen to her.
I would affirm with her if it made her uncomfortable and she said it didn’t so I saw nothing wrong and continued, but I should have just stopped.
Time passed and she eventually cracks under all of this pressure from me and just straight up tells me that she’s done with me crushing on her and that it’s making her extremely uncomfortable.
Well fuck.
I fucked up, in the back of my head I told myself it was going to be okay because this was all just flirtatious fun, I was so utterly wrong. I felt truly gut wrenchingly sick when I saw those words, not because I was in love with her but the fact I pushed my friend to the edge like this.
I said my piece to her and she said she forgives me but I can’t help but feel like I’ve done irreversible damage to our relationship I told her she can consider the feelings mutual and we were staying platonic, it was never my true intention to be anything but.
In my own delusions I convinced myself that I needed her, and only her, and I can’t take back the things I said or did, and now I feel like I’m losing the one person in my life who made me feel normal.
It’s not her fault in any way, I clinged to her and selfishly made her take care of me without a single thought for how she felt. Even though it ended in her forgiving me, I cannot forgive myself, there’s a huge hole in my chest.
I want to talk to her I want to be around her just like it was before, now I can’t even do that, she right there but I can’t even muster up the courage to even talk to her anymore.
This just makes all the the shit I’m going through just feel magnified x10, I can’t concentrate on anything I can only think about how badly I messed up, I’m going to start taking meds again, hopefully it fixes me this time.
Tldr: I most likely ruined the only true friendship I’ve ever had.

So, I (f28) have been dating "Mark" (m29) for five months. We met on Tinder and initially talked about our favorite movies, and books, and exchanged memes. Around the third date, we started discussing politics and gender equality. Mark said he doesn't care much about politics, but he seemed interested in what I had to say. Although he didn't fully understand my involvement in Pride events and women's rights organizations, he asked questions and showed genuine interest. I felt like the biggest difference in our views was that I liked the first Terminator movie the most, and he preferred the second one.
Today, we were sitting in a café talking about people we went to school with. At some point, we started looking for classmates we hadn't met for a long time on Instagram and discussing who was doing what. One of Mark's classmates is now a fairly popular influencer and I wanted to check out her profile. He gave me his phone and went to the toilet. I was scrolling through her photos when I received a Twitter notification about a reply. I was surprised because I had asked Mark about Twitter before and he said that he didn't really understand it and didn't have a profile. I decided to see what kind of reply it was and was taken to a thread about the "man vs. bear" discussion, maybe someone has seen it, it's a discussion where women say who they would rather be face to face with.
So Mark tweeted something like "If women are so afraid of men, they should stay at home all the time instead of being a (disrespectful language towards women)". I was astonished and closed the app. Then Mark came back and I told him I had to go home. On the way home, I started to bring it up a little bit so it wouldn't be super obvious, plus, to be honest, I didn't want him to know that I was looking at his phone, I was kind of embarrassed about it. I told him that I had seen a video on TikTok and asked him what he thought. He replied something like "I think people have more important and realistic things to discuss", so I didn't bring it up again.
When I got home, I found his profile and I was shocked. He doesn't have many followers, but he writes a lot of replies to different people, and each new one is worse than the last. For example, under a woman's tweet about traumatic childbirth, he wrote that "the right women don't feel pain in labour, but rather have a birth orgasm." He left many violent and sexualised comments under the tweets of different women, including one, under a photo of a woman in underwear, where he commented that she "deserved to be (violent act against women)". He made homophobic remarks about this year's Eurovision participants. He mocked people with facial injuries and those who are overweight. So much anger and hatred... I've been flipping through his profile for hours, and it's getting scarier. I don't know if these are his real thoughts and he's just pretending with me, or if he's having fun writing such disgusting things. I'm not sure if I should confront him about it, but I can't see myself wanting to stay with someone who holds these views.
So Reddit, how should I approach this?

I want to go through the home buyers’ program but I’m not sure if I can do it. I need to give a back story first. My grandma owned 2 homes in our hometown (she lived in one of the homes), an apt building, and part of a vacation time share in Florida. My grandmother put my dad (her son) in the other home so he wouldn’t have to pay rent (the white house). But he was responsible for paying taxes and the upkeep of the home. But unfortunately, he could never pay the taxes on time and spent his money poorly. So, She took care of it when necessary. I think that’s why she always kept the house in her name because she knew he would lose it. Now I’ve always known my dad to be a drunk and he had a gambling addiction too. He was a violent drunk and abusive to my mom. which he denies to this day and swears nothing ever happened but I remember things. You would think he would want to fix his life when I came into the picture. Me being his oldest child and first born at age 31. But no! my sister came 3 years later. My grandma died when I was 8 years old from the injuries of a car accident in 2000. She left a will and was also given a $100,000 settlement from the trucker who hit her. she left the (white house) to my dad. And her home she left to my dad, my sister and I. we all own a third with me and my sister being Co-owner. my dad stayed living in the white house and rented out my grandma’s home after her passing. He ended up losing the white house for not making payments and moved into my grandmother’s homes. Now that my sister (29) and I (31) are adults we want to sell the home. it is old and run down but still livable. my dad lives in the home but can’t keep up with it. he has never been good with money. And now that he is older and his health has declined it is not safe for him to stay in the home. But he will not leave. He has fallen a couple times and needs to be in a senior living apartment. It is hard on me and my sister because we live about two hours away so when something happens, we can’t get to him fast enough. My dad is the only child and acts like it. He thinks we owe him something. But he wasn’t really around growing up and always left us with broken promises. sometimes blamed us for things we had no control over as minors that had to do with my mother leaving him. Mentally it feels like I’m talking to a child when I talk to him. We have had offers on the home, people have come out and looked and gave us offers. He wasn’t okay with moving and had a complete tantrum about it in front of the realtor. Looking like a 5-year-old that wasn’t getting his way. But we had to explain to him that when he is gone, he is leaving us with debt because of him not making payments. Not to mention he always pay the taxes late to where he has to get liens on the home or payment plans. my sister has paid the taxes a couple times while living with him in her early 20s. but he's not getting my money I work hard for while he drinks and gamble his away. there was A lot we didn’t understand, and he wasn’t telling the truth, so we had to call and find out for ourselves. He wanted to get a $200,000 home repair loan for the house but can't do it without me and my sister's signature as well. I told him no! you're not putting me in debt. you will get that money and not use it for the house or pay it back! My dad is a selfish person and never thought about his kids. one minute its "this is all of our house" and when he's mad and doesn't get his way, then its "this is my house! mama left this house to me!". but we have the will we know what it says. He played stepdaddy to his wife and her kids before doing for us. And they treated him like shit including the wife. They married in 2008 have been separated since 2014 but she is still around when that check comes and driving his car because he can’t drive anymore. He had the nerve to tell me and my sister he wanted us to pay for his divorce. Not happening! He didn’t even think of us when he got the settlement from my grandma death. I don’t have any kids but if I did and something like that happens to me, I’m putting that money in an account for my kids to accumulate over the years that way by time they are adults they have some type of leeway to get by. But that money was probably gone the same year my grandma died. And when we bring it up my dad acts like there was never any money but my mom made sure she got all the paperwork for us as proof later down the line. Now my dad is living off social security. And still drinking. Which is more of a reason he needs to move. One minute he is ready to move and when it’s time to find places then he back tracks. It’s frustrating. He is a drunk, will spend his check on liquor and do the bare minimum with bills. Then expect his kids to pick up the slack like his mom did. you had enough time to get it together. I have my own problems and my own bills. You live in a way better area then your kids and still want to take from us while we are out surviving learning as we go. I work for everything I have. I’ve never expected anyone to do for me that I can’t do for myself.
Now I want to go through with the first-time home buyers’ program. But I’m not sure if I can do anything with that house in my name. and he knows this but doesn’t care. He won’t sell the house. I mean he is out voted 2 v 1 but I don’t have the money to take him to court to make him leave. Us selling the house can really help all 3 of us out. I’m doing ok for myself I live within my means, and I save. But in this economy what does that really mean. That money would really help, and my sister has four kids. That money could really help her too. I just don’t know what to do. I just want him to think about his daughters, shit his grandkids as well. I guess its too late. We are just trying to survive that’s it.

Throwaway account
Together 3 years, I (F34) and my partner (M33) have a great relationship overall. It’s the best relationship I’ve ever been in - he respects me, he holds space for me, lets me be who I am even when I am cranky or can’t articulate my feelings right away… he truly just loves and accepts me for who I am. And I love him for it. I love him because he makes me laugh, I feel safe with him, we ALWAYS have fun together, no matter what we’re doing (groceries, laundry, etc…), we travel well together, my parents love him and his parents love me. I’ve seen his annoying quirks and I can deal with them for all the positives. We’ve discussed marriage. There are no dealbreakers currently for me.
However….
Our relationship isn’t sexy.
There’s a multitude of practical life reasons why:

• I am on the pill which negatively affects my libido
• I have a stressful job that has been particularly bad in the last 9 months with the project I am working on
• Lately (last 3 months) I have been dealing with one of my pets being ill which has been a mental, emotional, and financial drain
• We are very comfortable with each other, burping and farting and upset stomachs etc is all open season and I fully admit my participation in that (cuz farts are funny) BUT the sheer frequency of all of it has reached a very unsexy point lol
• Inconvenience of timing: the typical times we have sex are at night getting into bed, or in the morning on weekends. The former I am usually exhausted and full from dinner at the end of the day, the latter often times we have things in the morning to get up and go do

And a few person related reasons why:

• I think my partner puts me on a pedestal a little bit, in the sense that he respects me SO much, that he doesn’t engage with me in a sexual way during day to day life
• He is less experienced sexually (this is a big guess but I can just tell by his engaging, foreplay, kissing etc). The sex itself is just okay
• He may not be a very sexual person or is straight vanilla; I say this because when I have asked him about preferences or fantasies before, he doesn’t have concrete answers. When I ask about frequency, he says he is “always down” for sex. He has never asked me once in 3 years for a BJ (I know he likes them), and doesn’t often initiate. When he does initiate, it is always in bed when we are naked, either going to sleep or waking up. I should also note, he has never pressured me for sex when I am not interested, he always backs off immediately and has never pouted if I decline

I would say the last year or so I have been dwelling on this more and more, especially as the sex gets less frequent. We average once every 2-3 weeks at this point.
For me, sex is most exciting at the start of a relationship. The novelty of a new person, the mystery around it, is when I am most aroused. I also have a responsive libido - I am very infrequently aroused on my own, but will become aroused when approached/stimulated.
I have read “come as you are”, “mating in captivity”, “she comes first”, and “love worth making”. Love worth making in particular really resonated with me the most, so much so that in December I asked my partner to read it, and he said he would, but hasn’t yet.
I’m starting to reach a point of frustration in the relationship and getting frustrated at him…. Last night for example, he does this silly butt jiggle thing to me which irritated me, and then when we got into bed he grabbed me from behind around my boobs and I immediately was like “I am NOT in the mood” to which he backed off immediately. I think the sudden flash of irritation I had is just… the only time he DOES engage with me in what could be considered a sexy way (touching a private part) it’s done in a silly manner. Which I find juvenile and not sexy.
Where I think we may be missing each other is that his understanding of my low libido, and high respect for me, puts him in a place of “I am going to let her decide when and where we have sex”, which is an insane amount of pressure on me. And then any sexual touching is framed in a silly way, to keep it lighthearted. I do initiate sex; I seem to be genuinely horny maybe once every 4-6 weeks, the rest of the times I’m initiating because in my mind it’s been 2 weeks and we need to have sex and he’s not doing it so I have to.
I just want to feel desired. And I don’t. I know he loves me and thinks I’m gorgeous, I just don’t feel it through how he engages with me.
I know I need to have a big long conversation with him about everything I’ve just laid out here, and I plan to, but I guess like everyone else I would appreciate some outside feedback…
My fears/concerns: - Is this normal? - Is our relationship meant to be more laughter and comfort than sexy? Can I reconcile that? - Can I reconcile that someone can still love me and want to be with me even if we don’t often have sex? - Are we sexually incompatible?
TLDR: my partner (m33) and I (f34) seem to be suffering the fate of many long term couples where our frequency of sex has decreased and it’s becoming a concern of mine. I want to find ways to increase sexiness and desire between us, as I am terrified to become a roommate couple, but there are also mitigating factors that hinder us from having sex more often than we do.

Im a student and im learning at various site so everyone is teaching me differently so when i ask this question, they blame it on my hand moving. One issues im finding alot is keeping a good flow. Im grounded, my hand steady, eyes on the needle and the second i undo the tourniquet on the last tube. I lose the flow and my confidence. Im stuggling to get the flow going again, i already had a patient scolded me when i let my mouth slip up (im a vocal person and often talk to myself) when i said "figures" as i lost another flow. What am i doing wrong. Am i really moving my hand and just not registering it?

With my second driving instructor, she said that I can let the wheel turn back to straight after making a turn. So I’ve been letting go of the steering wheel for a second or two. But my mom and I think maybe even my instructor said to keep my hands on the wheel.
So do I just let my hands skim/brush against the steering wheel as it straightens out instead of letting go of it (but keeping it very near)? Would letting go of it for a second or two make me lose points on my G2 exam? Thank you in advance!

Note: Please let me know if this is not the right place to post. I will delete it:
Hello good people! I am a solo female traveler from India. I am planning to go to Indonesia by the end of this year for 12 days. There are some places which i found interesting. Please note it is not the final list. I am not sure if I can visit all these places in 12 days. I am okay to skip Bali for now and cover it some time later in life. My main focus is not just to see places but to also experience Indonesia. I would love if you have any suggestions for me. I am okay to skip some places to have some good and local experience. Please let me know if there is something I MUST do when I am in Indonesia. I am not sure if it is too much to ask what i would love to have a local person to show around/tag or travel along, because as per my exp they know more than tourists or people who are new to the country. Also what are the stay option? Are hostels good to stay or should i check hotels? Appreciate all your help. Thank you so much!
Witness Tana Toraja’s death rituals
Hike to an active volcano to see sunrise, preferably to Ijen volcano
Borobudur Temple
Prambanan Temple
Komodo National Park
Last megalithic cultures in Sumba
Traditional timber sailing
Danau Toba and the Batak Highlands
Tanah Lot
Ubud
Hidden Canyon Beji Guwang
Jomblang Cave
Amparo Island
Wae Rebo Village
Purah Tanah Lot

BACKGROUND INFO: My BF and I have been together monogamously for 4.5 years - I have never slept or been with anyone else, though I've fooled around - and we have been struggling with arguments & aggression. We have sex like once a month, if that. We broke up this past summer but kept texting back and forth, and this past fall regrouped and tried to be in a relationship again. My BF is the best person I've ever met and I love him very much, but we didn't accomplish our goals when getting back together and the fighting became worse. We may separate again.
STORY: About 2 weeks ago my BF and I met this guy at a family friend event. He approached me first and we chatted, and then my BF came and we all chatted. I didn't initially find him attractive and thought he dressed similar to people that I felt rejected by growing up. Among other info, he told us he was in a long distance relationship (I sensed some pain there, since he said he preferred it being long distance ?) and we later learned it had been for 3 years. He invited us to hang out with 2 other guys after the event and we all had a really great time. I spent more time with the guy than my BF (my BF was very drunk and loves to meet new people and socialize) and I was constantly laughing. I didn't *actually* realize until the train ride home that I was feeling some pretty heavy attraction bs. I didn't think I was "that kind of person" in the sense that 1. I'd have these sort of feelings while in a relationship with someone I love and 2. about someone like this (see below)
I liked things about him that were different than my BF: he's taller, has darker and thicker hair (like me), he's older, didn't seem to take himself as seriously, he's American (like me), he really liked my hometown which caught me up, so to speak (my BF doesn't), has a different career, grew up with many siblings (my BF is an only child), smokes weed like a few times a year, similar religious upbringing to me, comfort-oriented, etc. His friends said he was a really good athlete back in the day - I have never been or dated an athlete, I was an art school / theater person. And I'm sure others would say he's conventionally attractive. He seems really "normal / jock," he works with houses / real estate (?) but I feel like an outcast and I've always liked outcasts. During the family friend event, he told me a story about him cutting his and his siblings hair and I genuinely laughed a lot. Shortly after he told the story, I was looking at his face and I was just thinking.. huh.
At one point when we were alone together after the event he reeeally unexpectedly to me started singing some song, I gawked a little and my heart did something small. He saw my expression and chuckled. My BF is not musical and cringes at others singing - I can't sing when I'm around him (and I grew up musical). I also really dislike when people you just meet ask you what music you listen to, but when he asked me what I like to listen to it didn't bother me at all.
He asked me to squeeze in next to him to make room at one point, and I declined and said my BF could sit on my lap instead because I at least knew that I thought he was attractive. And he was looking at me a few times when he probably thought I didn't notice. But at some point when we were alone and laughing, he put his hand right around my wrist and like touch my shoulder or something a couple times. He did some other quirky things, too ex: I tried to record a video of my BF on my phone and he jumped into it, which really wasn't necessary lol. His friend come up to the two of us trying to give advice about parenting and said "You know, when you guys have kids -" and the guy jokingly said "When [my name] and I have kids together?" and I tried not to laugh. Later near a bar he beckoned me over, we spoke and then looked at me to try to initiate a link-arm-drink with me and I did it but we were just looking at each other and I just felt like.. I don't know man. He highly complimented me on a skill I had and he'd been really supportive the whole time. He also admired how I could hang out with a bunch of (random) guys with my BF - like not needing to only do date-dates with my BF. He asked my BF and I if we wanted to hangout longer and I wanted to, but it was late and my BF and I ultimately thought it was easier to go back home instead. Then, while I was with my BF he only asked for my BF's number, which felt appropriate. We hugged formally, left and on the train ride home my BF fell asleep and feelings hit me like a brick.
ONE WEEK LATER: I'd been trying to process this and how I'd misjudged myself (I also listened to every single song in my library like hours of music and I hadn't done that in years) - I spoke to my boyfriend about having sexual feelings for this guy. My BF is trying to handle the information, so I have yet to tell him other parts yet ex: me experiencing continued fantasies of - if my BF wanted to - having sex with both of them, or my BF just allowing me to have sex with that guy. I intensely want to smoke weed with him (which I also haven't done in years) and have sex with him.
I feel guilty, but I keep "uncontrollably" picturing him when I'm hanging out with my boyfriend. I have an urge to ask this guy if he's in an open relationship and sleep with him before I leave the city - my BF and I are moving away, potentially to separate locations. But I really don't know if I'd gain anything life changing from it. (P.S. I never gave any indication that my BF and I were having issues.)
What do you think? + What is happening to me, and what do I do?
TLDR: My boyfriend and I have been having relationship issues and talk about breaking up. We have sex once a month if that. We met this guy one time at an event recently in a troubled (?) long distance relationship, and I think we both know we find each other attractive. I started having sexual feelings for him & fantasies that I've wanted to act on even though I love my boyfriend and still don't exactly want to leave him. I'm leaving the area soon I don't know what my next course of action is, what is happening to me, and if the feelings should be acted upon.
Thank you very much!

my problem is really long and complicated but i will try my best to say it in the best way.
i am an INFJ female and have been dating an INTP guy for 8 months and he is very smart, understanding and kind. The thing is, we always had gaps in our relationship, and there was some kind of things I couldn't understand or know about him. It was as if there was something off about him and it was very dark. He always found it difficult to open up to me. The only aspect he expressed to me was kind of from his past as a child and I could tell it was a very traumatic experience that it made me sick. And also the way he lacked or barely felt any sort of emotion. Thus, this thing was making him feel nauseous while around people or social activities, as if he never felt like himself. Being "real". It's as if he always feels like he needs to give people the feelings they need and want even when he doesn't feel the existence of those emotions. This is something some INTPs can struggle with as well and I know it's so stressful that in the end, you don't know why you're giving those feelings when you already know their points. However, you don't want to feel misunderstood. So either way, this is not a win for you and you have to do something about it. So I accepted him and always told myself that I would never make him feel what others did and I told myself that I would build an environment where he could always feel at peace and himself. Because he always wanted to feel peaceful. We were all the time supporting each other, feeling happy together and discussing random topics with each other. I really liked it all. He was very close to my heart and I will always love all of him no matter what. He had some insecurities and was always trying to hide them from me because as he would always say he didn't feel enough or didn't love them etc. I embraced him all in because what I truly loved was his soul and his heart and I couldn't care less about the way he looked. But the thing he was trying to show me something or let me say give me hints in this period of time. I couldn't understand what he wanted or meant, I thought he wanted me to understand him more or be with him more and I was willing to do that. But he always said he was a terrible person, he had done some awful things in his past and he couldn't forgive himself for it. I was trying to know what dose he meant by that? Is there something I don't know? When I asked him about that, he said yes, I don't know it. And he probably won't tell me about it forever. But to be more specific he kind of told me some about it. That he smoked at a very young age and that he hurt a lot of people and bullied them. And so, I analyzed that based on his past experience and the way people treated him so dirty, it was a very natural response of his mind to protect him. However, I still accept it all and loved him even more. cause no matter what nothing can changes what i have in my heart towards him. So let me get to the point I have always viewed him to be a melancholic person who always wore a mask to please people, who always wanted to find real meaning in this rotten life, who wanted to feel at least something. He was trying but he couldn't. Thus he was always superior to his emotions, which always caused discomfort and pain to his heart. He always told me that this life has no meaning and when you get to know its points you will see that everything is connected to our instincts and nothing more or less. I really agree with him on that. But it seemed like he had a lot to say but preferred to shut it down. And I bet the reason he didn't find me qualified enough to hear all those facts. Maybe he didn't want to bother me with those. Or maybe he doesn't see the point in telling me. I will not raise my assumptions. But he always told me he wanted to be left alone. that he is not interested in life/studies/relations. He just wants to be left in peace. And I really wanted to give him everything he wanted. If people were taking away what he wanted, I would be the one to give him all that. Even if it means sacrificing my happiness because the only happiness I find is within him So he told me there was one major thing he did in his past that it was way disturbing than the things he mentioned and he clarified that I'd hate him for it and I was already prepared. I was waiting patiently I was waiting happily. Because I was sure that I would not hate him and the idea of me proving it to him encouraged me more. I imagined the worst scenarios he could ever do. And I was like yeah. I'll still love him, it doesn't fuckin matter. but suddenly he changed his mind about telling me and choose to say it when its about to leave.
So.. two days later we had an argument. And at that time. He started saying a lot of things, he said he made a mistake and started saying that he had a side I didn't know about, that he was a liar and a manipulator, he told me he lied about everything and he was trying to hint me about them that he is a really awful person. He told me he was trying to feel something for me but he didn't. and he said there was just a little tiny thing towards me and it was confusing to him to understand why. but it didn't actually mean anything and maybe because he created it. He also told me he didn't want to be with me from the first place, he lied about everything he lied about the moments he spent with me, he lied when he thought I was beautiful, he lied when he said I was perfect. But he also told me that he didn't lie about some things. His name, his past, his people, his opinions. He told me he was in love with someone before me who was an INFJ and was and still in his class and still he said he didn't want to be with her either. He just wants to be left alone, but he would like to talk to her and find something repulsive about her, so he hates her because he was struggling with the feelings he had towards her and also to convince himself that she is not as perfect as he thought. He never spoke to her (but always observed her).
He also said that this is a big chance he is with me because he must want to forget her and maybe he used me for that reason he is not sure why he was with me in the first place but that may be the case. He said his mind didn't want anyone. He said he was born alone and wants to continue on his own. He also told me about the thing he did and if i could say It is worse than murder and theft.. He told me that he is a terrible person and I need to know the truth. He said that he wants to solve his problem with me by letting me know so that I can leave him and he continue on his path.
But something in me. still wants to be with him. I just don't understand myself. I know that it's not the best decision and I'm so ridiculous for that even when he told me the terrible thing he did. It's like I don't have any problem, I just want to stay with him and I'm not disgusted or even disappointed. To explain this, I must have no morals within me. cause what are we at the end? we are human beings. And most of the time we act according to our instincts, why do we have morals? Because we were born and programmed for them and why we have to cling to them? perhaps because we want the perfect image of ourselves and ego. and maybe because we want to protect ourselves from the society and play games. Everything in the end comes down to our instincts and ego, no matter what. This is something we can do nothing about except accepting the nature of our humanity. That's why I can't have morals. From anything even murder. theft. r3pe. They are just humans acting according to their instincts. he told me it's not the correct thing to stay with someone like that. he told me i am opening a door for him to manipulate me more. and i need to be careful yet i don't listen. i just want him and he seen that i am just hurting myself more and more.
It's very confusing how he manipulates? and for a period of 8 months.? I don't understand, there were so many times it felt real, how could this also be manipulation? HE Fuckin cried. I heard his feelings and pain. I felt it and saw it every time he vented to me, I could literally feel what he was feeling, how could that be manipulative.? The times we also laughed and teased each other and the times we fought. And his madness and anger are all lies.? For a long time, why? I don't understand, I hope I don't sound immature if this is the reality and I will accept it but how can this be true? I literally felt it. I felt it so bad. We have a lot of things and we shared a lot of things. He showed me his annoyance and sadness. Everything. He took care of me and pulled me up when I was about to break up with him and when he asked me a lot of questions about different things he literally was leaving his STUDIES to stay with me. he was loving to see me. I don't understand the only explanation I got for this was that he felt something but wasn't sure. Even he himself didn't know why he was still with me and why we were together. He couldn't understand his reasons and emotions clearly and I could see that. Maybe this made him think he was using me. Maybe, why not.
in the end he felt that i was hurting myself more and more and that made him feel it wasn't the good option for him to stay with me so instead of trying to let me hate him he started to want to delete each other. and i just fuckin can't it's like i am just contradicting myself. i swear i don't mind it i'd still love him even IF HE WAS A MOSNTER he just can't get it , he felt it was very illogical and stupid to love someone like this. and yet i still do i can't lie or suppress it. he told me he must lie again and he can't stay with me basically cause he doesn't love me or even hold emotions for anything. and he told me what is the point of me staying with you? and yes he's right. but i fuckin insisted on him and i told him to give me a chance and i will show him. he refused and said there is no point. i told him i will make him feel emotions again. he said okay. and he accepted this afford forcibly and i told him if he didn't feel anything than he can basically destroy my life and i am capable of all the consequences.
right now we are in a relationship and i could say it's very toxic and cold. but yet we still speak and discuss about some sort of things what i really need is that you guys hold no hate for him cause i forgave him. he literally had some bad experience with his past and it surly affected him mentally and physically. and not everybody perfect or capable of baring all that to became a good person. he done mistakes in his past and surly this thing affected his image so he started to see himself as the bad and awful person as always. even though he held something very sweet in him. but yet he can't understand it.
Give me your opinions and tell me whether he really manipulated me or whether the confusion and lack of understanding of some loophole led him to reach a conclusion where he used me, because even himself is not sure about it or what he is doing. Secondly, he must have a lot of hatred for himself, but he turns it into nothing. Because he told me about the disturbing thing he did in his past and yet this thing will make him feel like he no longer needs the attention to care and it is a hopeless situation for him to give it a chance. so he extinguished his feelings because there was a high probability that I hated what he did, so he protected himself mentally. He always thinks he is a bad person. Even if he swallowed the good and intended it in his heart. It will still always turn to be a bad action in his eyes. And all because the idea of wanting to be a good person is not clean in his mind. And it cannot be. He sees his past experience and compares it to the image he wants to be. But it can't. and since then. He will feel better when he accepts that fact he is a terrible person. more than the a good one cause it's less painful than trying to be something you don't feel like you'll fit in.

Let’s say I have 200k in cash. I have several rent properties. I believe in financial freedom from the bank. I can pay off a house that is sitting pretty at 2.87 interest. Or buy a new rental with cash
Go

I’ve always been a girl who wanted a beautiful wedding. But due to various reasons nothing went as planned. My mother in law didn’t let me choose my outfits. She would call me and tell me “I already bought outfit for haldi and you’ll love it”. She chose my outfits for every event. i changed the cocktail outfit last min because it was ridiculous, she chose something like grandma’s would wear. what irked me so much is whatever outfit she chose for herself outdid my outfits. Out of respect i wore whatever she told for the other 3 ceremonies. I thought the makeup would turn out great but instead the makeup artist did a very bad job, she put a foundation that’s like 3-4 shades darker, it oxidised badly and i looked so bad, even the pictures look so bad. Everytime i look at the pictures, they just make me wanna cry.
If i do another photoshoot with my husband, wearing the outfits/ makeup of my choice will i feel better about this situation? Or should i let go of it? please give me suggestions what i should do to stop overthinking about this

Hey I’m active army, just passed sec + yesterday. I have Comptia A+ and Sec+ now and a secret clearance. Going to start network + studies next week. Any CSP or Army skillbridge recommendations for people tryna to get into Cyber?

DETERMINANT CHOICES DO APPLY
Here are your choices:
-Kenny returning to kill the walker attacking Lee and helping Lee escape the pharmacy. (S1 E1)
-Kenny lifting the door to help Lee escape the walkers. (S1 E3)
-Kenny going down into the building to help Christa escape the walker room. (S1 E5)
-Kenny going down to try to help Ben in the alley. (S1 E5)
-Kenny giving himself up when Carver attacked the ski lodge and had either Clem or Sarita hostage. (S2 E2)
-Kenny taking the fall for Clem when Carver demanded who had the walkie-talkie and and subsequently losing his eye. (S2 E3)
-Kenny helping Rebecca deliver her baby AJ safely. (S2 E4)
-Kenny getting the pickup truck working outside of Arvo's place. (S2 E5)
-Kenny telling Clem to take care of AJ and letting her go if Clem decides to abandon Kenny. (S2 E5)
-Kenny sacrificing his spot in Wellington for Clem and AJ if Clem didn't shoot Kenny and stayed with him. (S2 E5)
-Kenny telling Clem to leave him and make sure AJ is okay after Kenny goes through the windshield with walkers approaching. (S3 E1)

Did anyone feel like they had more self control after leaving Christianity? As a Christian there was always talk of dealing with sin and I did struggle. After leaving im better person, less judgmental of others, the wrongs I used to do are no longer a problem because I learned self control and I know that turning the other cheek is unhealthy. My church family used to tell me I was unattractive, call me an idiot, and tear me apart so bad for no reason. I literally walked away more broken than when I walked in. The hardest thing is feeling like such an idiot for believing that stuff and allowing it go on because I thought I needed accountability.The struggle is real, even though I’m not Christian, I do know there is a God watching over me. I just think the people in the church don’t know him. So sad, how my mind got twisted. To anyone else struggling your not alone.

We all know this game is going to die by its own sword being fell upon....Now this isn't to be said because of doomsaying; I loved this game, far back enough that I stayed on Koltyr and helped people learn weird things on every new character.
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Instead of locking the map to corridors that STILL require people to setup logistics, they should have expanded the Koltyr map with rotating warp gates (Without a map rotation). There's almost no reason they should have made the map behave the way it does when server pop is too low.
Hell, theres been rumors of an outfit wars map, I don't understand how they got rid of Koltyr and didnt just turn it into an arena for the 40 people online during off prime

Now therefore go to, proclaim in the ears of the people, saying, Whosoever is fearful and afraid, let him return and depart early from mount Gilead. And there returned of the people twenty and two thousand; and there remained ten thousand.And the LORD said unto Gideon, The people are yet too many; bring them down unto the water, and I will try them for thee there: and it shall be, that of whom I say unto thee, This shall go with thee, the same shall go with thee; and of whomsoever I say unto thee, This shall not go with thee, the same shall not go

I know what some of you will say… You don’t have to write the letter, just leave and fade. Hear me out…I have been POMO for almost a year by just fading. I have decided to write the letter for 2 reasons. 1. My family is in denial and think that I’m not leaving and feel it is a faze I’m going through. 2. The fucking elders won’t stop calling me and showing up unannounced. Nice guys, but, WTF!? Get a clue my guys!
So just going to pull the bandaid off and sending the letter and tell them in the letter I will not be attending any judicial meeting or want to be contacted.
I feel it is the best option for me to keep on my healing journey. Let me know in the comments what you decided and why if you want. 😁👍🏽

Im writing not necessarily because of me but for my bf. My bf and I have been together for almost a year and my "MIL" has consistently been manipulative and abusive to her son and my bf. My bf works 5/7 days a week, has his own car and a 3.6 GPA. He is very responsible and mature for someone of his age. His mother grew up in a nice house with a nice family and ruined her life at 15. Dropped out of HS and moved to FL to do drugs. She got pregnant with my bf at 19 with a shitbag. They went through problems with custody for 5 years until my 8 year old bf told the judge he wanted to switch houses every week. They did that until he was 13 and he basically cut his father off because he is awful. His mother believes she is so much better than his father because she went back to school and got a degree (in accounting). This is all background knowledge though. At the begining of our relationship I really wanted to be on good terms with her because I have had abusive MIL before and im not saying we have a bad relationship (mind you i dont see her too much) but its mainly about what she does to my bf. He wants to be the best man possible so he will try to be but she demands wayyyy too much and is extremely emotionally immature. She has done multiple things to ruin our days together. She will always call when we are out and demand we come and do something with her even if my bf told her that we had plans that day. She ruined our easter by demanding we come see her and grounded him over our 6 months. But that's not the worst. They get into arguments and she is extremely abusive with her language saying stuff about "Im never letting you see your gf again" "your just like your dad" whenever she feels her argument isnt logical. She will hit him but if he pushes her off she tells the whole family hes abusive. Its very upsetting for my bf. He just wants her to be proud of him. He has a car and she will demand that he drive 30 min there and back to pick his brother up from day care and not pay him a dime. She doesnt pay for anything for him anymore anyway beside his car insurance. She expects flowers after arguments and cries when something doesnt go her way. She believes that my bf should do everything for her and that he somehow owes her and continually ruins our plans (almost everytime). I try to tell him to push back and not just argue but he doesnt understand. There is no moments where she has been flat out rude to me but she still likes to talk bad about me to my bf. I know none of this is extreme like some peoples but its really undermining our relationship. I just want my bf to be comfortable in his own house

After many years of frustration interspersed with a few sublime shots per round, I had a breakthrough at the driving range. I finally answered the question, "Why can I hit my irons, hybrids, and fairway woods most of the time, but my driver ALWAYS slices or pushes ? (right - I am a right handed golfer).
The answer was staring me in the face the whole time. It's because my club face is open to the target at the moment I make contact. It's just that "simple." What to do about it? I've slowed down my swing. I've shortened my backswing. I've paid attention to my wrists for maybe the first time ever.
Last week at the range, I hit a small bucket of balls with my driver and, friends, I hit some fucking bombs. I know the average distance in this sub is probably like 260 in the air, so I'm not going to try to compete by bragging about my humble numbers, lol (/S /S /S), but I felt so happy I let out a whoop. Straight, high, far, and on-target, over and over again, on purpose.
Naturally, I went to my favorite public course, which is just gorgeous and also challenging, and my old habits crept back in. By the third hole, it seemed like no matter what I did, if I shot for the left side of the fairway, my ball would curve all the way over to the right side of the fairway. Fringe, bunkers, cart path, woods.
The difference: On FIVE holes of this round of 18, I fucking flushed it and put big drives in the dead center of the fairway. My goodness, it felt amazing.
Here's the educational psych part: I am currently taking a teacher education class and just watched a video explaining what we know about how people learn. You're not going to learn as well if you're constantly frustrated, the presenter said. Your students need to see and feel "success" (or a smaller version of "SUCCESS") as they learn. It keeps them engaged and focused on goals.
Here's how I apply this to golf, and maybe you should too: When I'm playing by myself, I either don't take a scorecard (or don't fill it in, and keep it for the yardages and course map), OR I score it, but give myself every advantage I can.
That's what I did yesterday: If sliced my driver, I just teed up another ball and hit it again (I'd retrieve the first ball if possible). If I skulled an approach shot with my five hybrid (one of my go-to clubs), I simply walked up to where it bounced to and hit it again, not counting the muffed shot.
If I missed a five foot putt, I grabbed the ball and did it again.
At the end of the round, I only counted the shots I hit that didn't get lost or get ugly.
Final "score" after 18: 90. Probable "real" score, if you count the whiffs, lost balls, and mulligans: 100 - 105.
Do I go around telling people "I shoot in the low 90s". Fuck no. I tell them I enjoy golf and I'm always trying to improve. But now I have a benchmark, and something to look forward to, and something to compare myself to when I play a real round, with friends or with strangers I get paired up with on the course.
As a disclaimer: I am well aware of course etiquette and I take it seriously. I had two slow foursomes ahead of me, and literally no one behind me. So that left me plenty of time for my secret mulligans. The starter saw me all alone with two balls on the green at one point, and he just waved at me and kept moving. So I was not obnoxious about this.
I guess I know people who are hard on themselves on the course, even if there's no one else there. The way I did it yesterday was fun. It's good to remind yourself to have fun sometimes.
p.s. I also signed up for a lesson this week. I want my teacher to better explain to me what I'm doing right, so I can replicate it, as well as what I'm doing wrong. It will be worth the money and the hour of my time for sure.