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2024.05.29 06:18 ConiferousBeard Question about integrating a mother-complex for healthy individuation (personal advice/Jungian perspective)
Hello everybody, I hope all of you are well.
I am writing this post to ask for some advice maybe, or feedback on how to successfully overcome, integrate, and process a mother complex that I think I am slowly starting to come out of, but am still very much entrenched in. I will provide only as much information as necessary to avoid overburdening everybody. To those of you who read, and reply, I thank you.
When I was young I had a tough upbringing as I was/am quite eccentric and this led to ostracization in school. In my life, the sole person who really was emotionally available in a way was my mother. Now, my father is not a bad person by any means, but I was 100% divested of a paternal father figure, as he always preferred to work. He had a problem with the kind of emotional availability that having children would entail (as I see it) and therefore unconsciously sought ways to preoccupy himself.
As a result of my upbringing I had very few friends, and developed a fear of what one could call 'normal socialization'. This is very Puer Aeternus type stuff. I actively pushed away sexual thoughts and matter, repressing any thoughts that would refer to my sexuality in any way possible. These ideas/thoughts would be diverted in other ways such as by an overemphasis on the pleasure of eating good and high quality food, as well as through fetishization. In a psychological sense, I was totally and completely dependent on my mother for a sense of security for most of my life.
Fast forward to today. I am in my 30s and actually took some major steps to freeing myself from that lifestyle. I moved out from my country of origin and as a result was naturally subjected to a wide variety of stimuli, friendships, and the need to adapt in ways I never have. It hasn't been easy, but slowly but surely I have been doing so. However, every day I continue to call my mother on the phone. I seem to depict it to myself as a kind of sympathy, because my mother is divorced and alone aside from having pets, and I out of all of my siblings feels a very deep sense of compassion and sympathy for her. I really do not feel like I have separated myself from her psychologically as a result, while moving definitely has made me develop quite a bit. That being said, I seek approval and validation for my mother all the time on account of this dependence, and I think this is something that is holding me back from "striking out" in the way Jung describes in Symbols of Transformation and perhaps elsewhere.
I have some background in Jung (and philosophy more generally) and am sympathetic to his therapeutic approach. This has been playing on my mind for a long time. I am just wondering, to make a long story short, if there is anything I should consider doing in order to, as Jung puts it, make the archetypes conscious and develop a healthy relationship to that mother archetype/complex. I'm not sure if it's as simple as not calling my mother every day, or something like that. Or does it have to do with making other sorts of archetypal content conscious?
I can list some things that I believe are related to this complex. I am ultimately optimistic, but some of the issues in connection to this have definitely filled me with anxiety.
Thank you in advance to anybody who provides advice or guidance on this matter.
submitted by ConiferousBeard to Jung [link] [comments]
I am writing this post to ask for some advice maybe, or feedback on how to successfully overcome, integrate, and process a mother complex that I think I am slowly starting to come out of, but am still very much entrenched in. I will provide only as much information as necessary to avoid overburdening everybody. To those of you who read, and reply, I thank you.
When I was young I had a tough upbringing as I was/am quite eccentric and this led to ostracization in school. In my life, the sole person who really was emotionally available in a way was my mother. Now, my father is not a bad person by any means, but I was 100% divested of a paternal father figure, as he always preferred to work. He had a problem with the kind of emotional availability that having children would entail (as I see it) and therefore unconsciously sought ways to preoccupy himself.
As a result of my upbringing I had very few friends, and developed a fear of what one could call 'normal socialization'. This is very Puer Aeternus type stuff. I actively pushed away sexual thoughts and matter, repressing any thoughts that would refer to my sexuality in any way possible. These ideas/thoughts would be diverted in other ways such as by an overemphasis on the pleasure of eating good and high quality food, as well as through fetishization. In a psychological sense, I was totally and completely dependent on my mother for a sense of security for most of my life.
Fast forward to today. I am in my 30s and actually took some major steps to freeing myself from that lifestyle. I moved out from my country of origin and as a result was naturally subjected to a wide variety of stimuli, friendships, and the need to adapt in ways I never have. It hasn't been easy, but slowly but surely I have been doing so. However, every day I continue to call my mother on the phone. I seem to depict it to myself as a kind of sympathy, because my mother is divorced and alone aside from having pets, and I out of all of my siblings feels a very deep sense of compassion and sympathy for her. I really do not feel like I have separated myself from her psychologically as a result, while moving definitely has made me develop quite a bit. That being said, I seek approval and validation for my mother all the time on account of this dependence, and I think this is something that is holding me back from "striking out" in the way Jung describes in Symbols of Transformation and perhaps elsewhere.
I have some background in Jung (and philosophy more generally) and am sympathetic to his therapeutic approach. This has been playing on my mind for a long time. I am just wondering, to make a long story short, if there is anything I should consider doing in order to, as Jung puts it, make the archetypes conscious and develop a healthy relationship to that mother archetype/complex. I'm not sure if it's as simple as not calling my mother every day, or something like that. Or does it have to do with making other sorts of archetypal content conscious?
I can list some things that I believe are related to this complex. I am ultimately optimistic, but some of the issues in connection to this have definitely filled me with anxiety.
Thank you in advance to anybody who provides advice or guidance on this matter.
2024.05.29 06:15 cmonman1993 Couple hired me as a photographer at their wedding and I didn’t show. They want to sue me now.
Hi,
A couple on a community What’s App group chat were reaching out to hire a photographer for their wedding.
I knew a friend of mine who used to be a photographer and she was ok lending me her camera for the event, so I reached out to the couple to let them know I could do it.
They asked me if I had a portfolio, and I used to photograph college graduations part-time a few years ago, but no weddings. Due to this, they were really (I mean REALLLY) short-changing me.
They offered me a total of $80 to be a photographer at their wedding and reception, and cited that they were taking a risk by hiring me but wanted to give me a chance. I was hesitant, but that money goes a long way for me and I was down bad lately so I accepted.
They sent me a contract which had our names and location of the event and other boilerplate language and I signed it.
The venue was really far away almost 2.5 hours away, but I had a friend who lived there and he was currently visiting me and was going to be going there anyway so I was going to hitch a ride with him and stay at his place a few days before the wedding.
Everything was going smooth, until a few days before the wedding they said that there is a storm and possible tornado forecast and they can’t have the wedding venue at that location anymore since it was outdoors and they were going to move the wedding indoors in a church right next to my house. That was perfect since I now didn’t need a ride to the other city. I let my friend know, and a few days later he went to the city by himself.
3 days before the wedding, the couple decided to move the wedding back to the city 2.5 hours away since the forecast was looking better. I didn’t even have a ride anymore since my friend left. I told the couple that it won’t be possible for me and they ignored me for 3 days. I assumed they probably decided to go with someone else.
Literally on the day of the wedding the husband is blasting my texts asking me where I am and that I’m missing important moments from the wedding. I show him the text that I sent and he said he didn’t read it because he was busy with the wedding. He asked me to call an Uber, but those were insanely expensive and I’d actually be at a huge loss taking an Uber. He said he was not going to pay for it since it was my job.
I couldn’t do anything else. I asked if he knew someone still in town I could hitch a ride with and he said no. He then started sending rude texts and saying some crazy (and also racist) stuff. I block him and turn off my phone.
When I turn it back on, I find that I was apparently the only photographer at the wedding and they didn’t have anyone else. They now want to sue me for contract breach and emotional damage. I can’t afford a lawyer and I called 5 people in my area and all of them are asking for $300-$500 per hour to look over my contract.
The couple are also posting my profile picture all over facebook and tagging me and saying I ruined their wedding??? And their friends are also commenting mean things.
I’m not sure what to do at this point. Please any advice would be greatly appreciated.
submitted by cmonman1993 to legaladvice [link] [comments]
A couple on a community What’s App group chat were reaching out to hire a photographer for their wedding.
I knew a friend of mine who used to be a photographer and she was ok lending me her camera for the event, so I reached out to the couple to let them know I could do it.
They asked me if I had a portfolio, and I used to photograph college graduations part-time a few years ago, but no weddings. Due to this, they were really (I mean REALLLY) short-changing me.
They offered me a total of $80 to be a photographer at their wedding and reception, and cited that they were taking a risk by hiring me but wanted to give me a chance. I was hesitant, but that money goes a long way for me and I was down bad lately so I accepted.
They sent me a contract which had our names and location of the event and other boilerplate language and I signed it.
The venue was really far away almost 2.5 hours away, but I had a friend who lived there and he was currently visiting me and was going to be going there anyway so I was going to hitch a ride with him and stay at his place a few days before the wedding.
Everything was going smooth, until a few days before the wedding they said that there is a storm and possible tornado forecast and they can’t have the wedding venue at that location anymore since it was outdoors and they were going to move the wedding indoors in a church right next to my house. That was perfect since I now didn’t need a ride to the other city. I let my friend know, and a few days later he went to the city by himself.
3 days before the wedding, the couple decided to move the wedding back to the city 2.5 hours away since the forecast was looking better. I didn’t even have a ride anymore since my friend left. I told the couple that it won’t be possible for me and they ignored me for 3 days. I assumed they probably decided to go with someone else.
Literally on the day of the wedding the husband is blasting my texts asking me where I am and that I’m missing important moments from the wedding. I show him the text that I sent and he said he didn’t read it because he was busy with the wedding. He asked me to call an Uber, but those were insanely expensive and I’d actually be at a huge loss taking an Uber. He said he was not going to pay for it since it was my job.
I couldn’t do anything else. I asked if he knew someone still in town I could hitch a ride with and he said no. He then started sending rude texts and saying some crazy (and also racist) stuff. I block him and turn off my phone.
When I turn it back on, I find that I was apparently the only photographer at the wedding and they didn’t have anyone else. They now want to sue me for contract breach and emotional damage. I can’t afford a lawyer and I called 5 people in my area and all of them are asking for $300-$500 per hour to look over my contract.
The couple are also posting my profile picture all over facebook and tagging me and saying I ruined their wedding??? And their friends are also commenting mean things.
I’m not sure what to do at this point. Please any advice would be greatly appreciated.
2024.05.29 06:14 Shanrock3000 I (26F) Kicked my (26M) boyfriend out of the house Any advice?
Last week I found out that my boyfriend was making female “friends and deleting all calls and text messages from his phone about it. I went through his phone because I had a weird feeling something wasn’t right (we do have each others passwords and have granted each other permission to browse about each others phones at any given time) So after a weird night where he came home from work he was requesting we engage in sex and I wasn’t really feeling it because it felt more like a demand to me and was not romantic in the slightest. This has continued to be the case ever since I had our third child back in November. Everything about our sex life has felt pressured, unromantic, demanding , unfeeling and honestly like a chore to me. Anyways this particular night was just feeling even more off as it spark a slight argument about how much sex we were apparently not having. The aggression mixed with the fact that we haven’t been talking much lately lead me to start feeling like he was hiding something. Particularly because my boyfriend is a pretty chatty guy. He’s one of few men that can literally talk for 24hrs nonstop. Honestly the slight distance wasn’t bothering me too much considering I have been going through my own postpartum depression and trying to stay stable and be a present mom to all three of our very demanding children which ages are 4,3 and 6 months. Literally NONE of these tiny humans can take care of themselves so I was just trying to manage my emotions the best I could and so not talking wasn’t a big thing to me. It wasn’t until that night that everything felt so very wrong to me that I decided after forever to peak into his phone. Hoping it was just my anxiety I snooped around and found things that seemed alarming to me. I noticed there were recently deleted messages from a woman I’d never heard of only 4 and one of them saying I’ll call you back. Which leads me to believe they’ve been taking often and these 4 messages are no where near the whole picture. I look at the message date and time and search his call logs and FaceTime for a call even closely corresponding to the text. Nothing came up. Then I decided to look for ANY call at all between them. Again nothing came up. This was enough to really deeply upset me because we had discussed boundaries in our relationship and one was that he currently told me he wanted to start making new “friends” and he’d like some to be female. I said okay that’s cool with me as long as you let me know you’ve made a new friend and are transparent about who you’re talking to. This was very important considering other times throughout our 6yr relationship he was dishonest about female friends and did things behind my back that were really painful during my last postpartum stage. Really all the postpartum stages. There are always secret calls and deleted texts with some new female friends”friend”. To that note he was searching up a women who we both agreed he would no long be friends with back when I had our other child and in his other iPhone that shares the same iCloud there were messages from a woman with the same name Bree but placed under the content JJ in his phone. I only knew it was Bree because he literally had a text under the contact saying “Hey Bree it’s so and so” I was floored at this point and my trust has felt like it was truly broken. He made up excuses and told me it’s all a misunderstanding and he was being careless but I didn’t buy it and kicked him out. Now it’s been a week and pretty much everyday he tries to come back and get back together but I really don’t think I want to. I honestly feel like although I’ve been devastated and heartbroken a part of me feels at peace with this absence and to be done with this untrustworthy relationship. I’m so confused at the moment and keep trying to just spend everyday I can taking care of myself and our children. I’m just lost and would love some advice on this situation, any thoughts?
submitted by Shanrock3000 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
2024.05.29 06:12 Conclusion_National Library of Ruina - Fan Story Scene 2 - Roland Betrayed by the City
SCENE 1 OF THE STORY - Beginnings of the Anomaly https://www.reddit.com/libraryofruina/s/1yTO3qeElj
If you haven't seen scene 1 of the fan story, please go read it for contexts of what's going on. Simply put, roland has been replaced by a new guy from a different world. It is more specifically ours. Also, you might be wondering where roland is... well
Roland: I knew it was a lie... I shouldn't trust anyone.... And they were just trying to get rid of me... that damm Hanna Association.... and Head...!!!
" Yea, Angel, some coffee would be nice... I think I would know some good coffee places that we can go together... How about we meet tomorrow morning? How does that sound.
To be continued...
submitted by Conclusion_National to libraryofruina [link] [comments]
If you haven't seen scene 1 of the fan story, please go read it for contexts of what's going on. Simply put, roland has been replaced by a new guy from a different world. It is more specifically ours. Also, you might be wondering where roland is... well
- Roland is lying on a bed... Slightly dropped down by the Teleport of a Purple tear with smoke covered the area..
- Then He feels something in this pocket... It was a note....
- Roland stands there in complete silence and shock... completely different world... He was just some experiment rat... damm it all... damm, that whole damm city.... Damm, that pianist for taking his one light his wife and child..... Damm it....
Roland: I knew it was a lie... I shouldn't trust anyone.... And they were just trying to get rid of me... that damm Hanna Association.... and Head...!!!
- He breathes heavily and then stands there and says "That is that, and this is this.... Remember that..."
- He looks around in this room and finds a wallet and opens it
- he see a id and a girl and boy Picture besides it as well. With the name on the id. "Willam Xeon manger of YumYum Sandwichs" Roland:... mmm, he does look like me... and I bet that this is his room... It seemed similar to the city... It's not as high tech as most houses, but it's definitely nice... It's probably similar to somewhere in the nest... Maybe... I... I... could change.... Take the mask of this person... Build a new life... and leave all that pain in the city behind me.... Maybe call retirement or something.... but... If I find a way back... Somehow somewhere.... Lori... Oliver.... I will find you and I will kill you.... Even though you were my teachers and my friends... I trusted you two... I believed you two... You are the last two people that I would ever see betrayed me... but you did... For that I can never forgive this city for what it's done...
- He lays on this new bed, which to him is very surprisingly comfy, and then the cell phone on a nearby desk rings.
- He looks at it and finds a nickname "Angel." In the picture of this, look similar to his wife angelica... And then realizes that the image of the boy and girl that both of them were probably in a relationship of some kind.
- Roland looks shocked... Roland: What.... no way.... Angelica, you.... I see.... I get it now.... Ahahahhahahhaaahahhahaha! This willam guy is me.... From a different universe... Different name... Different person... different world but that girlfriend of his... It almost looks like Angelica... There's no mistake that... So I play my part... so I can one day find that source of my sorrow and have my revenge... Until then... Let me put on my mask and never think about that sorrow AGAIN.
- He picks up the phone and he hears her speak clamly...
- Her voice was angelic... It seems like he found someone almost identical to his wife... Is somehow some way... Irony strikes the person unexpecting this turn of events
" Yea, Angel, some coffee would be nice... I think I would know some good coffee places that we can go together... How about we meet tomorrow morning? How does that sound.
- She gets excited and tells him that she can't wait and tell him that she loves him.
- He shakes... and tell her that he loves her and will see her tomorrow.
- He hangs up and drops to the ground, crying his heart out.... All his sorrows pour out as he still tries to understand what just happened to him and what will happen and what he got himself into...
To be continued...
2024.05.29 06:07 Acrobatic_Order4392 AIO because of my boyfriend’s recent behavior?
Someone help me determine if I’m overthinking or not…
Recently, my boyfriend has been making jokes about “if” we’ll be together, “if” he’ll come see me in August at college (he’s already taken time off to do so), and “if” this and “if” that about our relationship. It’s gotten to the point where I’m overthinking because it came out of nowhere and him and I NEVER made jokes about that before.
I had confronted him about this and he said they were just jokes and not to worry… kind of ruined my mood for the night unfortunately. We talked about it later that evening when I was finally home and k apologized for being acting weird because of those jokes and he apologized for saying them.
Just tonight, I noticed that he had also changed the background of his phone… It used to be a picture of me but now it’s just some generic Apple Wallpaper. When I confronted him about it, he told me the other picture was old and he wanted to change it (meaning he’d do it later). He apologized for this and didn’t want me to worry… yet here I am worrying lol.
Lastly, he’s been texting one of his friends a LOT more frequently. He’d never used to go on his phone when we spent time together (I’m talking like… nearly 5 months not doing this and we’ve been together for 6 months now). It’s one of his male friends who just recently got out of a long relationship, and I know it’s probably just jealousy that he’s focusing on his friend (which I know is okay and I totally get it… but to be doing it constantly has started to freak me out a little).
I can’t tell what’s going on or if I should truly be worried and talk to him about my feelings… am I overreacting?
submitted by Acrobatic_Order4392 to AmIOverreacting [link] [comments]
Recently, my boyfriend has been making jokes about “if” we’ll be together, “if” he’ll come see me in August at college (he’s already taken time off to do so), and “if” this and “if” that about our relationship. It’s gotten to the point where I’m overthinking because it came out of nowhere and him and I NEVER made jokes about that before.
I had confronted him about this and he said they were just jokes and not to worry… kind of ruined my mood for the night unfortunately. We talked about it later that evening when I was finally home and k apologized for being acting weird because of those jokes and he apologized for saying them.
Just tonight, I noticed that he had also changed the background of his phone… It used to be a picture of me but now it’s just some generic Apple Wallpaper. When I confronted him about it, he told me the other picture was old and he wanted to change it (meaning he’d do it later). He apologized for this and didn’t want me to worry… yet here I am worrying lol.
Lastly, he’s been texting one of his friends a LOT more frequently. He’d never used to go on his phone when we spent time together (I’m talking like… nearly 5 months not doing this and we’ve been together for 6 months now). It’s one of his male friends who just recently got out of a long relationship, and I know it’s probably just jealousy that he’s focusing on his friend (which I know is okay and I totally get it… but to be doing it constantly has started to freak me out a little).
I can’t tell what’s going on or if I should truly be worried and talk to him about my feelings… am I overreacting?
2024.05.29 06:05 Dinosaurnamedbee My Best friends ex is obsessed with me, (and possibly everyone ever.)
I can't believe I'm writing this. But I need some insight cause I find myself getting angry and confused. This is my first reddit post. Please excuse my redditor literacy.
This is the most convoluted story. It is long. But it's a ride.
You've been warned.
(Fake names obviously)
I (20f) have a best friend, Karl (20m) of 4 years. Now I see what you might assume. No. We're close but I'm mainly into women, I currently have a partner and have had a partner 90% of the time they where dating.
Now Karl got with Regina(19f) late 2022, the relationship started off rocky as she said "I only want you" but then kissed her ex, and then couldn't decide who she wanted. But still insisted once she chose Karl, she wanted to stay friends with her ex. Posted pictures when they'd "hang out" where it looked like she was sitting on his lap. But she swore she wasn't. Constantly blocked him after things would happen, then unblocked him, lied, then cried when Karl would find out.
Yes. Infuriating. But here you go. That's how Regina was introduced to our lives.
It took a while but eventually I tried to look past this. I care about Karl, if this was who he loved. We accepted it. Infact made it a point to invite her out to gatherings, made sure to offer her food, offer her drinks, chatting. Making sure she's involved. Gassing her up. Girlie things. (God I'm so desperate for everyone to love me it's a problem.)
Then her friends, ex boyfriend began to follow me, I had hoped this was because of how well I'd done to make friends. But this waa short lived.
Originally I'd just hoped it was banter. I'd chat to them, often sending pictures with Regina in her classes and joking with me.
Unfortunately I have social impairments, Slowly it became clear they where just laughing at me, calling me names but with cutesy emojis. Remember the girls in highschool? The ones thatd pretend to be your friend in class because it was funny? Like that.
So i stopped paying attention, often ignoring them. Unfortunately it only got worse. It got to a point I'd be spammed and have my instagram story replies with slurrs, calling me a pdf. File??? (I was talking to someone 6 years older than me?) Weird references, calling me cringe (I know. I know, worst thing ever right.), picking on my hair, my eyes(strabismus), my clothing. So I folded. Told Karl I wouldn't be dealing with it anymore. I'd blocked them, and asked karl To ask Regina to ask her friends to stop contacting me, I was doing my finishing project in college (uk) to get into university and it was getting to point I couldn't focus. I told him what had been happening, that I didn't know what her problem was. But I am a adult woman and this was bizarre.
Now, that alone. I forgave and in time, forgot. She had allegedly appologized "for them" and didn't know any of that was happening and had no I'll intent and hoped we could still be friends. Okay, sure.
Weird semi important point: she confessed in a groupchat that she used to be a 'chav' I said " you do look like someone who'd have bullied me" Banter. She then posted on her Instagram story (Paraphrased by memory) "When someone says you look like someone who'd have bullied them- but your friend died" I can't remember, but it was along the lines of that kind of 'what the fuck does that even mean'
Upon a later night of drinking, regina was talking to Karl about the ex, Mike. I brang up the fact her ex boyfriend kept liking my photos and was following me Hoping to bond over the fact this guy was weird, common girly bonding
"You know he only follows you so he could make fun of you and how cringe your posts are". She laughs.
The group goes quiet and holy shit I'm embarrassed. I just internalise that and change the subject.
Later I repost a reel of a guy saying something vaugely corresponding to this convosation. Basic premise when someone tells you their friend talks shit about you, then obviously you ask "why do they do that to you" (I know childish but at this point I was starting to really dislike her. My friend had sent it to me, It was late.) When i say She launched, "if you've got a problem talk to me instead of being weird and I'd tell you I was so scared of Mike and he held such a power over me and I just let him chat shit" I'd love to just mention this is after the 2nd time she'd unblocked him to talk to him behind Karl's back. I put up with it. Karl is at this point family. And if this is who he loves. We have to love her too.
This is all important to the point I swear.
Anyway.
My partners (now ex) friend Frank (22) and us fell out. Unimportant to this story but he let me know, Regina and an old very close friend had a groupchat to say very unpleasant things about me in, despite this old friend I never stopped speaking well of. Hoping we'd find eachother again. He'd been scouted when we had fallen out. But respected me enough to tell me. Another confrontation where she is so misunderstood and I'm making a big deal out of nothing and she's never ever had a problem with me.
Okay. Talked to Karl again. He is shocked but takes her word. As I'd kinda expect. Its his girlfriend. He took her to London over my birthday, he didn't want to ruin it. So he gave it up.
Karl throughout this is withdrawing from us. When he's with us it's like the light is gone from his eyes. He's distracted, quiet, doesn't laugh as much. Often tries to slip out of meetups because he'll "only bring you guys down". He's constantly picking up his phone. Constantly messaging. Cancelling plans. He won't talk to us. We where all worried.
Karl few months later calls me for advice. Turns out she kept getting caught in lies about her ex and general behaviours. Ignoring him for days again, threatening to game quit if she doesn't get the attention she wants. It'd all gotten so tiring that he didn't have any attraction to her anymore. He had no sex drive. He dreaded seeing her. But had to constantly message her. He's been feeling like this for months. Karl didn't want to leave her just before her birthday, he felt it cruel. But then it was the anniversary coming up. He didn't want to be responsible. He'd tried gifts, trips, anything just to make her happy. No matter what he did he still felt like nothing was enough. I managed to talk him through. About threatening suicide if someone wants to leave, is indeed abuse. He wasn't himself. How we felt and how we where worried. He got choked up. Not realizing anyone cared. He asked if he should leave. I asked if he was happy. "I can't imagine not having her there." Okay no. Not what I asked. Eventually he confessed He'd never felt lower. I said. Can you see yourself marrying her? No. Infact he said the thourght freaked him out. I said. Well. Why are you with her. Eventually it got to a point He left her. She said she'd been thinking about it. Yay? No 12 hours later he calls me saying its all fixed. Its all okay. How He's a horrible person for doing this to her. How it's him that needs to change. How he will spend a long time making this up to her. You know. I'm a domestic abuse survivor. But I never realized how much hearing that killed abit of my sould. Trying to convince Karl that he's worth anything is like trying to convince a deaf non signing American Conservative that the gays aren't trying to make him gay too.
They do eventually a few months later split. She says she wants to breakup as he "doesn't love her the way she wants him to" he is hurt but says okay. She then obviously realizes hey, he isn't gonna start begging on his knees. You can only hurt someone so much. She then asks "breakup sex" directly after and to this day its our favourite quote. But he says no, she asks for one more night, he says no you just broke up with me? Leave? She complains about not being able to get to the train station. Now. Karl didn't have his licence till a few weeks later. So queue the weirdest car ride with his DAD you've ever heard of. She cried. Hugged him. Begged him to reconsider. Karl officially has realized how disconnected he's become. Nah.
Queue a weird amount of messages ranging between "I'm sorry baby" to "I CANT BELIEVE YOURE GIVING UP ON US" and sexually charged messages, After karl finally blocks her. She begins to call him from various different numbers. Tries to get with his friends. Fails. Still calls him crying for the next 6 months. In which these events happen.
Frank from before. Now it turns out. While we don't have full timeline but either weirdly around the time they broke up they got /very/ close. To the point despite Frank having a partner. She was begging him to sleep with her. But Being weird with it. One minute she wants him. Next she doesn't. Basically, she loves the idea that she could have him. But doesn't want to keep any of them. Frank had a girlfriend. Goddess of a lady. Daisy. Regina proceeded to pick on every little thing to Frank about daisy she could. Always. Physical appearance.
Then. Now I am simply not making this up. after Frank separates himself from this situation. Regina begins to harrass Daisy, With telling Daisy about how much Frank's missing out on not shagging her instead.
And making 6 different instagram accounts to harrass them, and this is where I come in further.
Regina now, after the hate group chooses some last straws she can pull to drag him back. She makes a fake account. Goes to message Frank. With the opener of gossip about me and my partners sex life. I talked to Regina less times than I can Count on one hand.
The main one I'm aware of is "Did you know my partner drinks my names piss" Which I'm not here to kink shame; but this does not happen unfortunately but i still find it beautiful of a statement.
I one day due to some more harassment and more attention than I'm used to.
Decide to private my instagram. It was only for 24 hours in full so I could change some settings and archive some things. Within 15. An account. David, requests to follow. Strange. Cause my account is shadow banned and cannot be shown to non followers. I click. Heavens foretold dear friends. Regina's new boo. Id like to clarify. 2 weeks before Karl was still getting snotty teary calls telling him she misses him. Karl's friends where sending screenshots of Regina trying it on with them then getting snotty when she was rightfully laughed at.
I ask "hi??"
"Hi me and my girlfriend just wanted to stalk how cringe your posts are" I wish I could have been funny and not caught off guard. And shamed them. Oh god. I wish I had. Basically I told him, the gym is waiting. She will chew you up. Idk what I did but I'm sorry. Godamn. Leave me be. And they said "It's not that deep lighten up" I am indeed embarrassed.
But they kept mentioning my workplace. I am a bartender, and one day she did come in with a man, they seems very loved up but then again. It certainly wasn't this guy. then said bad things about me infront of a coworker. It was a little satisfying seeing her face fall and hit the table from shame as I was carrying an ice bucket past her. She was already cut off at this point for her antics.
David's best friends memepage now follows me. But has been the first out of 5 accounts not to say anything. I'm sure they think I don't know. David claimed I was lying in my encounter. I do wonder if I could flip the table entirely.
but I also wonder if she's just very mentally unwell. But it's been 1.5 years of this and I'm just abit knackered and pissed off.
I'm 20 feeling like a highschooler. But I'm working for a bipolar diagnosis and I have ADHD, the paranoia. Is driving me up the wall man. Like this woman knows enough of my details and she's spread where I work. She's been to my house. She has clearly gotten multiple people involves historically and despite me trying to apologise, it makes no difference.
If I knew what the issue was, I'd gauge it. But it's not knowing and not being told. But it's reassuring it's not just me. With daisy, I'm wondering if this is historic. Might be vanity? She (used to?) Post alot of ...suggestive photography and always wears a lingerie corset and heavy makeup, filters. Nothing wrong with that of course but she's a very sexually orientated person, and given the contexts to that behaviour. I wonder if its to cover some in depth issues. But that's just a theory. Part of feels hey, if she needs men to tell her that I am ugly, cringe and worth nothing. Then she van have that. The other half makes me want vengeance for the boy, prove that I'm not whatever she'd been making me out to be and make her realize she needs to change. But that's. abit pathetic innit.
Anyway I doubt anyones made it this far and if you have. Thank you for reading my story and the weirdness of it. I hope it hasn't been too shit. Just needed to get it off my chest. And maybe if anyone has anything to say.
TLDR: my best friends ex has always had an issue despite my efforts. Getting various people to harrass and bully me, She tried to get with his friends, other guys we knew and harrassing us all. All while still crying she misses him. Her new bf thinks I'm lying and is joining in, his best friend now follows me too. My partner allegedly drinks my piss <3
submitted by Dinosaurnamedbee to TrueOffMyChest [link] [comments]
This is the most convoluted story. It is long. But it's a ride.
You've been warned.
(Fake names obviously)
I (20f) have a best friend, Karl (20m) of 4 years. Now I see what you might assume. No. We're close but I'm mainly into women, I currently have a partner and have had a partner 90% of the time they where dating.
Now Karl got with Regina(19f) late 2022, the relationship started off rocky as she said "I only want you" but then kissed her ex, and then couldn't decide who she wanted. But still insisted once she chose Karl, she wanted to stay friends with her ex. Posted pictures when they'd "hang out" where it looked like she was sitting on his lap. But she swore she wasn't. Constantly blocked him after things would happen, then unblocked him, lied, then cried when Karl would find out.
Yes. Infuriating. But here you go. That's how Regina was introduced to our lives.
It took a while but eventually I tried to look past this. I care about Karl, if this was who he loved. We accepted it. Infact made it a point to invite her out to gatherings, made sure to offer her food, offer her drinks, chatting. Making sure she's involved. Gassing her up. Girlie things. (God I'm so desperate for everyone to love me it's a problem.)
Then her friends, ex boyfriend began to follow me, I had hoped this was because of how well I'd done to make friends. But this waa short lived.
Originally I'd just hoped it was banter. I'd chat to them, often sending pictures with Regina in her classes and joking with me.
Unfortunately I have social impairments, Slowly it became clear they where just laughing at me, calling me names but with cutesy emojis. Remember the girls in highschool? The ones thatd pretend to be your friend in class because it was funny? Like that.
So i stopped paying attention, often ignoring them. Unfortunately it only got worse. It got to a point I'd be spammed and have my instagram story replies with slurrs, calling me a pdf. File??? (I was talking to someone 6 years older than me?) Weird references, calling me cringe (I know. I know, worst thing ever right.), picking on my hair, my eyes(strabismus), my clothing. So I folded. Told Karl I wouldn't be dealing with it anymore. I'd blocked them, and asked karl To ask Regina to ask her friends to stop contacting me, I was doing my finishing project in college (uk) to get into university and it was getting to point I couldn't focus. I told him what had been happening, that I didn't know what her problem was. But I am a adult woman and this was bizarre.
Now, that alone. I forgave and in time, forgot. She had allegedly appologized "for them" and didn't know any of that was happening and had no I'll intent and hoped we could still be friends. Okay, sure.
Weird semi important point: she confessed in a groupchat that she used to be a 'chav' I said " you do look like someone who'd have bullied me" Banter. She then posted on her Instagram story (Paraphrased by memory) "When someone says you look like someone who'd have bullied them- but your friend died" I can't remember, but it was along the lines of that kind of 'what the fuck does that even mean'
Upon a later night of drinking, regina was talking to Karl about the ex, Mike. I brang up the fact her ex boyfriend kept liking my photos and was following me Hoping to bond over the fact this guy was weird, common girly bonding
"You know he only follows you so he could make fun of you and how cringe your posts are". She laughs.
The group goes quiet and holy shit I'm embarrassed. I just internalise that and change the subject.
Later I repost a reel of a guy saying something vaugely corresponding to this convosation. Basic premise when someone tells you their friend talks shit about you, then obviously you ask "why do they do that to you" (I know childish but at this point I was starting to really dislike her. My friend had sent it to me, It was late.) When i say She launched, "if you've got a problem talk to me instead of being weird and I'd tell you I was so scared of Mike and he held such a power over me and I just let him chat shit" I'd love to just mention this is after the 2nd time she'd unblocked him to talk to him behind Karl's back. I put up with it. Karl is at this point family. And if this is who he loves. We have to love her too.
This is all important to the point I swear.
Anyway.
My partners (now ex) friend Frank (22) and us fell out. Unimportant to this story but he let me know, Regina and an old very close friend had a groupchat to say very unpleasant things about me in, despite this old friend I never stopped speaking well of. Hoping we'd find eachother again. He'd been scouted when we had fallen out. But respected me enough to tell me. Another confrontation where she is so misunderstood and I'm making a big deal out of nothing and she's never ever had a problem with me.
Okay. Talked to Karl again. He is shocked but takes her word. As I'd kinda expect. Its his girlfriend. He took her to London over my birthday, he didn't want to ruin it. So he gave it up.
Karl throughout this is withdrawing from us. When he's with us it's like the light is gone from his eyes. He's distracted, quiet, doesn't laugh as much. Often tries to slip out of meetups because he'll "only bring you guys down". He's constantly picking up his phone. Constantly messaging. Cancelling plans. He won't talk to us. We where all worried.
Karl few months later calls me for advice. Turns out she kept getting caught in lies about her ex and general behaviours. Ignoring him for days again, threatening to game quit if she doesn't get the attention she wants. It'd all gotten so tiring that he didn't have any attraction to her anymore. He had no sex drive. He dreaded seeing her. But had to constantly message her. He's been feeling like this for months. Karl didn't want to leave her just before her birthday, he felt it cruel. But then it was the anniversary coming up. He didn't want to be responsible. He'd tried gifts, trips, anything just to make her happy. No matter what he did he still felt like nothing was enough. I managed to talk him through. About threatening suicide if someone wants to leave, is indeed abuse. He wasn't himself. How we felt and how we where worried. He got choked up. Not realizing anyone cared. He asked if he should leave. I asked if he was happy. "I can't imagine not having her there." Okay no. Not what I asked. Eventually he confessed He'd never felt lower. I said. Can you see yourself marrying her? No. Infact he said the thourght freaked him out. I said. Well. Why are you with her. Eventually it got to a point He left her. She said she'd been thinking about it. Yay? No 12 hours later he calls me saying its all fixed. Its all okay. How He's a horrible person for doing this to her. How it's him that needs to change. How he will spend a long time making this up to her. You know. I'm a domestic abuse survivor. But I never realized how much hearing that killed abit of my sould. Trying to convince Karl that he's worth anything is like trying to convince a deaf non signing American Conservative that the gays aren't trying to make him gay too.
They do eventually a few months later split. She says she wants to breakup as he "doesn't love her the way she wants him to" he is hurt but says okay. She then obviously realizes hey, he isn't gonna start begging on his knees. You can only hurt someone so much. She then asks "breakup sex" directly after and to this day its our favourite quote. But he says no, she asks for one more night, he says no you just broke up with me? Leave? She complains about not being able to get to the train station. Now. Karl didn't have his licence till a few weeks later. So queue the weirdest car ride with his DAD you've ever heard of. She cried. Hugged him. Begged him to reconsider. Karl officially has realized how disconnected he's become. Nah.
Queue a weird amount of messages ranging between "I'm sorry baby" to "I CANT BELIEVE YOURE GIVING UP ON US" and sexually charged messages, After karl finally blocks her. She begins to call him from various different numbers. Tries to get with his friends. Fails. Still calls him crying for the next 6 months. In which these events happen.
Frank from before. Now it turns out. While we don't have full timeline but either weirdly around the time they broke up they got /very/ close. To the point despite Frank having a partner. She was begging him to sleep with her. But Being weird with it. One minute she wants him. Next she doesn't. Basically, she loves the idea that she could have him. But doesn't want to keep any of them. Frank had a girlfriend. Goddess of a lady. Daisy. Regina proceeded to pick on every little thing to Frank about daisy she could. Always. Physical appearance.
Then. Now I am simply not making this up. after Frank separates himself from this situation. Regina begins to harrass Daisy, With telling Daisy about how much Frank's missing out on not shagging her instead.
And making 6 different instagram accounts to harrass them, and this is where I come in further.
Regina now, after the hate group chooses some last straws she can pull to drag him back. She makes a fake account. Goes to message Frank. With the opener of gossip about me and my partners sex life. I talked to Regina less times than I can Count on one hand.
The main one I'm aware of is "Did you know my partner drinks my names piss" Which I'm not here to kink shame; but this does not happen unfortunately but i still find it beautiful of a statement.
I one day due to some more harassment and more attention than I'm used to.
Decide to private my instagram. It was only for 24 hours in full so I could change some settings and archive some things. Within 15. An account. David, requests to follow. Strange. Cause my account is shadow banned and cannot be shown to non followers. I click. Heavens foretold dear friends. Regina's new boo. Id like to clarify. 2 weeks before Karl was still getting snotty teary calls telling him she misses him. Karl's friends where sending screenshots of Regina trying it on with them then getting snotty when she was rightfully laughed at.
I ask "hi??"
"Hi me and my girlfriend just wanted to stalk how cringe your posts are" I wish I could have been funny and not caught off guard. And shamed them. Oh god. I wish I had. Basically I told him, the gym is waiting. She will chew you up. Idk what I did but I'm sorry. Godamn. Leave me be. And they said "It's not that deep lighten up" I am indeed embarrassed.
But they kept mentioning my workplace. I am a bartender, and one day she did come in with a man, they seems very loved up but then again. It certainly wasn't this guy. then said bad things about me infront of a coworker. It was a little satisfying seeing her face fall and hit the table from shame as I was carrying an ice bucket past her. She was already cut off at this point for her antics.
David's best friends memepage now follows me. But has been the first out of 5 accounts not to say anything. I'm sure they think I don't know. David claimed I was lying in my encounter. I do wonder if I could flip the table entirely.
but I also wonder if she's just very mentally unwell. But it's been 1.5 years of this and I'm just abit knackered and pissed off.
I'm 20 feeling like a highschooler. But I'm working for a bipolar diagnosis and I have ADHD, the paranoia. Is driving me up the wall man. Like this woman knows enough of my details and she's spread where I work. She's been to my house. She has clearly gotten multiple people involves historically and despite me trying to apologise, it makes no difference.
If I knew what the issue was, I'd gauge it. But it's not knowing and not being told. But it's reassuring it's not just me. With daisy, I'm wondering if this is historic. Might be vanity? She (used to?) Post alot of ...suggestive photography and always wears a lingerie corset and heavy makeup, filters. Nothing wrong with that of course but she's a very sexually orientated person, and given the contexts to that behaviour. I wonder if its to cover some in depth issues. But that's just a theory. Part of feels hey, if she needs men to tell her that I am ugly, cringe and worth nothing. Then she van have that. The other half makes me want vengeance for the boy, prove that I'm not whatever she'd been making me out to be and make her realize she needs to change. But that's. abit pathetic innit.
Anyway I doubt anyones made it this far and if you have. Thank you for reading my story and the weirdness of it. I hope it hasn't been too shit. Just needed to get it off my chest. And maybe if anyone has anything to say.
TLDR: my best friends ex has always had an issue despite my efforts. Getting various people to harrass and bully me, She tried to get with his friends, other guys we knew and harrassing us all. All while still crying she misses him. Her new bf thinks I'm lying and is joining in, his best friend now follows me too. My partner allegedly drinks my piss <3
2024.05.29 06:04 DistinctMatch4491 What do I do about my (27M) girlfriend’s (27F) friend (28M) being in love with her?
Throwaway because my girlfriend knows my main. So as it states in the title, I (A 27-year-old man) have a girlfriend (a 27-year-old woman) of 3 years. We met through a mutual friend who had been insistent on introducing the two of us because we would, and I quote “automatically fall in love”
Well he was right, that son of a bitch. The moment I met her I knew I would never meet anyone else like her. I stand firm on my belief that she is too pure for this world, she is an eternally kind and loving person. She is the kind of person to give you the food on her plate even it means she starves. I assume that's a trait that comes from growing up as the oldest daughter in a house of 6 brothers. But nevertheless, she's the best person I know and I love her to death.
Now, here is where my problem comes into play. My girlfriend is a songwriter, she writes songs and sells them, and works with different artists on different projects. Recently, she has been working on an album with this guy, Alex. I was first introduced to him about two months ago when she brought him and his band over for dinner, me and my girlfriend cooked it together and even taught one of the bandmates how to make bread from scratch. It was a wonderful night and I was thankful to be able to be a part of my girlfriend's job like that. As for Alex, he seemed like a decent guy, very much a jokester as he had most of us laughing the entire time. Just seems like a very good guy.
My problem started around week two of knowing him. My girlfriend came home practically jumping for joy as she told me she was going to be singing on one of the songs. Alex had apparently asked her to do a duet with him. I was over the moon excited for her, she has a beautiful singing voice, and its one of the things I love about her. She told me that they were going to be recording the next day and she would love it if I stopped by. I didn't think twice before agreeing and when I went the next day I was in awe of her. I stood outside of the booth, next to this couch where the other bandmates were. Alex and her were both in the recording booth. I remember just listening to my girlfriend and all of a sudden I caught a glance of the look on Alex’s face and to say he was completely entranced would be an understatement. He was looking at her with this look that I can't even begin to explain but it was just like he was completely captivated by her. I brushed it off after that because knowing my girlfriend it's hard not to be just in awe of her. I didn't think too much about it for about another week.
Until I got a call from a buddy of mine, he called me and told me to check Alex’s Instagram story. I did and the first thing I see is a picture of my girlfriend in the studio with the words “If I'm dreaming, never wake me up” and a pink heart emoji. My friend is practically fuming saying things like “That's so rude, why would he do that, he knows she is dating you, etc.” I immediately tell my friend to calm down, because it's not the most damaging post ever and in hindsight, it could be a joke. I brought it up to my girlfriend later and she told me that he verbally said that to his friends and everyone laughed so she knows it was a joke that he put it as the caption. I just accepted that answer and moved on.
Then a couple of days after that, we all went out for drinks as a little celebration of my girlfriend and Alex finishing the song. My girlfriend and I excused ourselves to get more drinks, we got them and she told me she was going to the restroom so I should go back to the table. I was walking to the table when I overheard them talking. It was dark and there was a good crowd so I don't think they saw me walking up. But I overheard this exchange;
Guy 1: “She literally brought him, what don’t you get?”
Alex: “It's not like they're married. Plus she hardly talks about him, maybe she's bored.”
Guy 1: “That doesn't mean she wants you.”
Alex: “It's worth a shot.”
I kind of slowed my steps, not really processing what I was hearing. My immediate thought was the optimistic “Maybe they're talking about someone else?” But when I later got home I realized the obvious, my girlfriend was the only girl there. Who else could they be talking about? Again, I tried to brush it off. I didn't want to be the guy who didn’t trust his girlfriend.
Then the second shoe finally came down. About two days ago, I was on a call with this guy, I'll call him Tim. Tim is the assistant manager for the band, and has been the only one I seriously became friends with out of these band guys. I was on the phone with him yesterday and we were chatting about miscellaneous things and it was casual. Until I brought up my girlfriend. I told him how excited she was about this album. Tim got quiet and his voice started to get a bit guilty. I asked him what was wrong and that's when the dam broke. He told me about how Alex had been telling people he is in love with my girlfriend a long time. How almost all the love songs on the album, which Alex has said to my face were about an ex of his, were really about my girlfriend. Tim told me that he constantly talks about getting her away from me, and how he could give her a better life. With fancier things and luxurious vacations. I was sick to my stomach.
I'm a pretty normal guy, I think I'm decently attractive, I take good care of myself, and work out a good amount. I try to give my girlfriend the best things but I'm a junior associate at my law firm, so I make at best 50,000 a year. I give her everything I can even when she doesn't ask for it and the thought that it might not be enough just kills me. Tim was extremely apologetic for not telling me sooner, and I forgave him, I can understand the situation. After the call, I couldn't shake this nagging anxiety. I love my girlfriend, she has never given me a reason not to trust her. I believe that she would never in a million years cheat on me, or even consider it. So it's not her I am particularly worried about. I don't even want to be worried in general, I trust her, and I love her. But there's this nagging feeling of just anxiety I get at all times of the day. I feel helpless to do anything because I don't want to tell her this and ruin one of the best music opportunities she's ever had. Something which she is so excited about. I just can't stand this worthless feeling, this feeling like I'm not enough for her or that I need to do more. Call me insecure, I probably am. I just can't stand to lose her. It would probably kill me. So what should I do? I'll take any advice at this point.
TL;DR: My girlfriend's coworker is in love with her and actively is trying to win her over. I love and trust my grilfriend but I am still feeling poorly about this. What should I do?
submitted by DistinctMatch4491 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
Well he was right, that son of a bitch. The moment I met her I knew I would never meet anyone else like her. I stand firm on my belief that she is too pure for this world, she is an eternally kind and loving person. She is the kind of person to give you the food on her plate even it means she starves. I assume that's a trait that comes from growing up as the oldest daughter in a house of 6 brothers. But nevertheless, she's the best person I know and I love her to death.
Now, here is where my problem comes into play. My girlfriend is a songwriter, she writes songs and sells them, and works with different artists on different projects. Recently, she has been working on an album with this guy, Alex. I was first introduced to him about two months ago when she brought him and his band over for dinner, me and my girlfriend cooked it together and even taught one of the bandmates how to make bread from scratch. It was a wonderful night and I was thankful to be able to be a part of my girlfriend's job like that. As for Alex, he seemed like a decent guy, very much a jokester as he had most of us laughing the entire time. Just seems like a very good guy.
My problem started around week two of knowing him. My girlfriend came home practically jumping for joy as she told me she was going to be singing on one of the songs. Alex had apparently asked her to do a duet with him. I was over the moon excited for her, she has a beautiful singing voice, and its one of the things I love about her. She told me that they were going to be recording the next day and she would love it if I stopped by. I didn't think twice before agreeing and when I went the next day I was in awe of her. I stood outside of the booth, next to this couch where the other bandmates were. Alex and her were both in the recording booth. I remember just listening to my girlfriend and all of a sudden I caught a glance of the look on Alex’s face and to say he was completely entranced would be an understatement. He was looking at her with this look that I can't even begin to explain but it was just like he was completely captivated by her. I brushed it off after that because knowing my girlfriend it's hard not to be just in awe of her. I didn't think too much about it for about another week.
Until I got a call from a buddy of mine, he called me and told me to check Alex’s Instagram story. I did and the first thing I see is a picture of my girlfriend in the studio with the words “If I'm dreaming, never wake me up” and a pink heart emoji. My friend is practically fuming saying things like “That's so rude, why would he do that, he knows she is dating you, etc.” I immediately tell my friend to calm down, because it's not the most damaging post ever and in hindsight, it could be a joke. I brought it up to my girlfriend later and she told me that he verbally said that to his friends and everyone laughed so she knows it was a joke that he put it as the caption. I just accepted that answer and moved on.
Then a couple of days after that, we all went out for drinks as a little celebration of my girlfriend and Alex finishing the song. My girlfriend and I excused ourselves to get more drinks, we got them and she told me she was going to the restroom so I should go back to the table. I was walking to the table when I overheard them talking. It was dark and there was a good crowd so I don't think they saw me walking up. But I overheard this exchange;
Guy 1: “She literally brought him, what don’t you get?”
Alex: “It's not like they're married. Plus she hardly talks about him, maybe she's bored.”
Guy 1: “That doesn't mean she wants you.”
Alex: “It's worth a shot.”
I kind of slowed my steps, not really processing what I was hearing. My immediate thought was the optimistic “Maybe they're talking about someone else?” But when I later got home I realized the obvious, my girlfriend was the only girl there. Who else could they be talking about? Again, I tried to brush it off. I didn't want to be the guy who didn’t trust his girlfriend.
Then the second shoe finally came down. About two days ago, I was on a call with this guy, I'll call him Tim. Tim is the assistant manager for the band, and has been the only one I seriously became friends with out of these band guys. I was on the phone with him yesterday and we were chatting about miscellaneous things and it was casual. Until I brought up my girlfriend. I told him how excited she was about this album. Tim got quiet and his voice started to get a bit guilty. I asked him what was wrong and that's when the dam broke. He told me about how Alex had been telling people he is in love with my girlfriend a long time. How almost all the love songs on the album, which Alex has said to my face were about an ex of his, were really about my girlfriend. Tim told me that he constantly talks about getting her away from me, and how he could give her a better life. With fancier things and luxurious vacations. I was sick to my stomach.
I'm a pretty normal guy, I think I'm decently attractive, I take good care of myself, and work out a good amount. I try to give my girlfriend the best things but I'm a junior associate at my law firm, so I make at best 50,000 a year. I give her everything I can even when she doesn't ask for it and the thought that it might not be enough just kills me. Tim was extremely apologetic for not telling me sooner, and I forgave him, I can understand the situation. After the call, I couldn't shake this nagging anxiety. I love my girlfriend, she has never given me a reason not to trust her. I believe that she would never in a million years cheat on me, or even consider it. So it's not her I am particularly worried about. I don't even want to be worried in general, I trust her, and I love her. But there's this nagging feeling of just anxiety I get at all times of the day. I feel helpless to do anything because I don't want to tell her this and ruin one of the best music opportunities she's ever had. Something which she is so excited about. I just can't stand this worthless feeling, this feeling like I'm not enough for her or that I need to do more. Call me insecure, I probably am. I just can't stand to lose her. It would probably kill me. So what should I do? I'll take any advice at this point.
TL;DR: My girlfriend's coworker is in love with her and actively is trying to win her over. I love and trust my grilfriend but I am still feeling poorly about this. What should I do?
2024.05.29 06:02 westoneichner wholesome duo😀
 | submitted by westoneichner to wholesomememes [link] [comments] |
2024.05.29 06:01 Surfer949 Editing photos on PC then viewing on a mobile device. Any tips?
I'm starting to do post editing of my kids soccer games using Lightroom. The pictures look great on my monitor but when viewing on my phone you lose the framing and some details because of the screen size.
Are there any tips on editing for viewing photos on mobile devices?
submitted by Surfer949 to AskPhotography [link] [comments]
Are there any tips on editing for viewing photos on mobile devices?
2024.05.29 05:59 SpiritPilgrim Was I (M36) a terrible partner to her (F35)?
Hello women of Reddit,
I'm going through a very rough time emotionally and spiritually and have always found peace when I express my thoughts by writing them out so I figured I would find a Subreddit to express myself and see what strangers who are impartial to my situation will say. There's always two sides to a story, so I'll be mindful to not sit here like a narcissist trying to paint a holy picture of myself and an unholy one of her. I pledge to be completely honest, even if I am burned at the stake in the comments for any wrongdoings of mine. Please note there's a limit to how many characters I can type in here, so 20 years of history for important context will need to be summarized as much as possible. I'll do my best to keep it relevant and share the parts that matter.
In my first year of high school at age 13, a friend of mine was dating a girl from a different high school that he would bring around to hang out with us. She seemed like a nice girl as far as I could tell, but I couldn't help but notice how literally everyone who had something to say about her would always highlight and emphasize that she was a slut and they would tell stories about stuff she has done when she was drunk. I didn't think much of it at the time because why would I? It had nothing to do with me. Soon after, I moved to a different high school and cut ties with that friend.
A few years went by, and one day out of nowhere to my surprise, she called my house to say hi, and to see if I wanted to hang out. I decided to hang out with her because I learned from her that she was no longer dating the guy I met her through, and we were somewhat acquainted already so it felt ok. We started to hang out a lot and I started feeling those fuzzy feelings in my stomach where I knew I was beginning to develop feelings for her, and so much that I was finding myself "borrowing" my dads' car when I didn't yet have my license just to be able to go see her. People around me who knew her started to notice that her and I were getting close, and I started getting warnings from literally dozens of people to not bother with her because she's a slut, and she's just going to hurt me in the end. Despite all these warnings, the feelings I had inside of me for her at that time were too strong to ignore, so I ended up ignoring the warnings people were giving me and wanted to judge her from my experience with her rather than other people's words.
During the time I was hanging out with her, I soon learned that she was apparently seeing or casually dating someone new, which of course bothered me because I liked her and I could feel from her that she liked me too. I started noticing that certain times in evenings she would not answer her phone at all and because I was increasingly growing so in love with her, I literally would begin to sit outside her place down the street in a car just to see what the hell she was doing certain evenings that she wouldn't answer my calls. Of course, it soon became obvious to me that she was going to see this guy she was "seeing" because she would always jump in a taxi very late night and get dropped off at the same house. I'm ashamed when I look back and realize that I was somewhat stalking her and being creepy, but the intentions weren't bad but rather just a little too curious, and it was also killing me inside to see her casually seeing this older guy who I felt was probably just exploiting her for sex. I say that because it was weird to me that she never hung out with him during the day as friends like her and I did but only went to see him late at night, so my mind started messing with me a lot and all the rumours about her started coming in as intrusive thoughts. I'm already a person who has a very deep depth of conscious thoughts so I can sometimes get very deep into my imagination and that's not really a good thing when the mind goes into dark and negative places.
One day during an afternoon I dropped by her house unannounced and I knocked on her house door but no one answered even though I was sure she was home. I went to the side of the house and climbed up on a utility box below her bedroom window that she would always sneak out of, so I can look through the window and maybe get her attention, and I instantly couldn't believe my eyes. There she was butt naked having sex with her ex-boyfriend, the guy I was friends with in early high school. I felt sick to my stomach that I walked right into that so I quickly left to my car and immediately drove off. It was so disturbing to see this and also to realize she was fucking an older guy and also liked me, all three at the same time. I never brought that up to her during that time because it was just too foul to mention. One night, she called me and asked me if I can pick her up from a friend's house because she had too much to drink and couldn't get home safe, so I said okay. When we got to her house, she asked me to help her inside, and so I did and next thing you know when we are sitting on the couch her hands are in my pants, she pulled me into her bedroom, and we had sex for the first time. This was when I lost my virginity.
After this point her and I began to start sleeping with each other regularly and of course it made me love her more and more. I couldn't deal with the circumstance the way it was and so I got very serious with her and let her know I was not cool with what she's doing and that she would need to stop this madness. We got into a lot of arguments and fights about what she was doing and we fought and fought, until one day she suddenly out of nowhere came to me and said she "broke up" with the older guy. She told me she wanted to be official and be a real exclusive couple together with me. I felt this sigh of relief go through me, but also somehow it didn't feel as good as it could've or should've had I not known all these past issues about her.
Here we are suddenly an official couple, and I started realizing that I had this deep insecurity anytime she would say she wanted to go hang out with her girlfriends and "guy friends" to party. I wasn't into drinking and partying at that age and so I would always tell her no, especially if other guys are around, but she didn't care what I had to say and would do what she wanted anyway. When I would try to stop her, she would fight me and tell people that I was being controlling. I felt like I had no power and didn't know what to do because I always thought she will get drunk and do somethign with other guys and that scared the shit out of me.
Soon after I randomly met a girl at a friends house who took interest in me. One day just like that I decided to hang out with her and I ended up cheating on my GF with her. I regret that I did that but looking back on it, I feel like I did it because I was so insecure and upset deep inside at everything I was going through with my GF and her going out partying and drinking with other guys around that I just didn't care anymore and went with it. She eventually found out that I cheated, and demanded I end contact with that girl and I did. I saw that it actually hurt her and I apologized for it and luckily for me she forgave me despite showing serious displeasure. I explained to her that I messed up and I did it because I thought she was likely cheating on me anyways and I had a hard time getting over her past. We both agreed to move on from that. That was when I was 19 and it was the only time I ever cheated on her. I learned from that one mistake I made.
A few more years went by, and still she was giving me a very hard time when it came to going out drinking with her friends. I was working very long 16-hour days at that time, and it never sat well with me for her to go out and get drunk when I'm not present. We continued to fight and argue over this, and she simply never understood me on why I didn't want her to do this. I would do this because I knew that when she drinks, she's not herself at all. She becomes very flirty and inappropriate, and I didn't want that to happen if I'm not around to look after her and stop her from doing dumb shit. Either way, she would do it and ignore what I say. I got fed up with this and ended up breaking up with her. During this time of being broken up, I started trying to see other girls and despite meeting other women in platonic terms, my heart kept wanting her back. So after six months of being broken up, I went back to her and tried to talk to her to see if she wanted to get back together and try to have a fresh start. She immediately showed interest, but she said she had to let me know during the time broken up that she started seeing and having sex with someone else. Despite not offically being a couple at that time, it shattered me. Why? Because I couldn't believe that after everything we went through, she would just go and fuck another dude who was clearly exploiting her for sex. I know that because she dropped him in the snap of a finger to come back to me, so obviously there was nothing of substance there other than her avoiding being alone. I cried about it and ultimately accepted being together again.
Many years went by again and new problems came up, now she is comparing me and us to her friends and their boyfriends. Giving me a hard time that I don't buy her designer bags and spend money on expensive items for her. I would argue with her over this a lot because to me, it was just stupid to be buying junk like this when you don't have too much money to spare, especially at our age, but she didn't care. Every day was arguing and fighting and her putting me down simply for not buying her designer bags. This is when I began to notice that I was starting to get verbally abusive towards her with name calling, belittling and shaming for stuff she's done wrong. There were also many times where I would get physical with her too by grabbing her by the shoulders and shaking her out of frustration during arguments because she would drive me insane with her words. I didn't know how else to express my anger so it always translated mostly into insults about her promiscuity and history. Anyway, eventually I got so fed up with her that I ended up telling her to take a hike and that I don't want to be with her if this is the type of person she's going to be by disturbing the peace in our household with constant comparisons to others. I didn't actually literally mean it when I told her to take a hike and leave and this is something I would often say when we would fight because when I'm angry I feel like I mean it but whenever I would calm down I knew I didn't want her to actually leave. She of course eventually took it literally, and when she did leave this time she immediately started seeing another guy. How did I know? I used 'find my phone' on her iPhone at that time to track her very strange movements and pulled up on her one day while she was with another man. The man shit himself when he seen me, kicked her to the curb and drove off while texting her to forget him. Her reason for doing this was, "you kicked me out, we are not together, and I don't want to be with you". All that just because I didn't buy her chanel and louis vuitton designer bags that her friends boyfriends were buying for them. Me being the low self-esteem insecure loser, I ended up trying to once again work things out with her and reconcile our relationship because I was afraid to lose her and be alone. It's embarassing to admit this but that's the truth.
Again more years went by and I had noticed that a depression and anxiety struggle I had over the years was starting to get pretty bad. Luckily in 2018 I was able to cure my depression in the Amazon Jungle of Peru by participating in several Ayahuasca ceremonies but unfortunately it didn't do anything to help my crippling anxiety. After that trip when I came home from Peru and she was again beginning to show signs of discontent by comparing me to other peoples boyfriends and was giving me a hard time every single day about stupid shit. She was telling me I don't do anything for her, despite over the years sending her on so many vacations with her friends and giving her thousands of dollars of spending money, bankrolling her business she started and so much more. I was taking so much of this from her on a daily basis that it was driving me insane to where I told her once again during the heat of an argument to take a hike if she thinks I'm so bad and of course she did just that. She never stopped to think of all the things that I have done for her but only seemed to focus on what I wasn't doing for her.
After she moved out we still talked regularly and I started noticing she was acting a bit weird. One night I asked her to go out for dinner and drinks and when we got back to the house she passed out drunk and so I went through her phone. I immediately went to her texts and found out she was seeing someone and the texts indicated it was potentially and most likely physical and so of course I lost my shit. I woke her up and confronted her about the texts and I will never forget the smirk she had on her face. I couldn't believe that once again she would do this and especially after fighting over dumb shit like comparing me to others. Everything I learned about this guy she was now seeing indicated she got with him because he appeared to have money. I felt this because she ridiculously and shamelessly stated she liked his Mercedes G-Wagon and all the comparisons to other people and the bad influences she had around her was obvious to me. Sadly, I again let myself down and begged her like a little bitch to stop talking to him and she was not wanting to this time. I was so fucking pathetic that I paid her a very very large six figure sum of cash to come back to me and to leave this guy. Before the cash offer she wasn't showing interest to come back but once I mentioned the money and bought her some jewellery, she suddenly was warming up to wanting to come back to me. I did, however, throw some contingencies in there that she had to come with me to Peru to participate in Ayahausca ceremonies because I felt like she had some serious internal issues and traumas that she also needed to sort out to change for the better. I felt like the reason she was always behaving so reckless and so concerned with other peoples lives and all these comparisons was because of some deep rooted traumas. I say this because she grew up without a father and without money so this is something I always considered about her and kept in mind. Participating in Ayahuasca circles really opened my eyes to trauma and behavior issues we humans have from stuff in our childhood so I knew all these messed up things she's doing stems from a root cause of something in her early life experience. It was certainly the reason why I needed healing because I had my own traumas from my childhood that was affecting my life and behavioir as well. Anyway, she hesitantly agreed and we went to Peru together. When we were in the jungle I felt her energy during one particular Ayahuasca ceremony and she seemed very scared and showing a side of her that I didn't see before. I knew right then and there that she is suffering from something in her soul that that she wasn't even aware of. I always did notice and pickup on her very serious lack of self awareness that she still seems to struggle with to this very day.
We got back home and everything seemed alright. I started noticing she was different in a way I hadn't witnessed before. Different in terms of her energy and her aura. One day she suddenly out of no where told me "after ayahuasca, looking back on myself, I feel like I was possessed by something very dark considering how I used to behave" .. She was referrng to her reckless beahvior and essentially saying she can't even believe her own past behavior and feels like she wasnt herself and now she is waking up and snapping out of it. I swear to god I cried tears of relief when she said this to me and I felt like maybe, just maybe we can have a normal life now. She also at this same time made a promise to me that she would never ever repeat those same behaviors again and that even if we were fighting one day and separated temporarily on a break for whatever reason, that she would give me the respect of letting me know before she talks to or dates any other men. Sounded very good to me of course.
Well, unfortunately Ayahuasca isn't a one trick pony and often times it requires many many ceremonies to fully heal deep rooted subconscious traumas and if you don't go back and finish what you started, you can slip back into old habits especially if you don't put in the work to change from the lessons you learn. I can only speak for myself and can say that I was still not doing too well with my anxiety and I wanted to go back to Peru again to do more work on myself. This time I left to Peru in 2021 and when I came back she was again suddenly being so nasty and mean to me when I was in an energetically sensitive state. Once again every single day back to comparing me to other men who shower their women with money and saying I never do anything for her like the entire past 17 years of everything I did for her, giving her cash, jewellery, vacations and cars all was nothing. The past didnt matter, it only mattered what I was doing for her in the moment. She drove me so insane for six months straight that one day I blew up and told her to either stop or get out. She decided to pack up and move out on her own. I tried to stop her but she didn't and she went anwyay. Some months went by and we would talk on the phone and she would tell me she realizes she has a lot of work to do on herself and that she is trying to heal herself. I told her great, I'm happy to hear that and I really did feel like maybe she might need this time alone to heal and it could possibly be what she needs. Well, unfortunately for me, she once again revealed to me a little over a month ago that she is talking to another man AGAIN and despite promising me she wouldn't do so without talking to me first, she did anyway. Her reason for breaking her promise is "were not together and I owe you nothing". She went as far as showing me text messages between her and this man from the USA and I asked her why she would rub that in my face and she said "I showed you that text so you can see that there are real men out there who wont just give bread crumbs to their woman". According to her, all I ever gave her was bread crumbs despite spending hundreds of thousands of dollars of my own money on her over the years, I am now being measured up with random men she met on dating apps. Here's the kicker, we dont live in the USA and she's been talking about wanting to move there for the last couple of years. Interesting how she now suddenly is speaking to a man online from there. You can draw your own conclusion on the motive for that.
The sad part of this all is that despite the resentment, I still love her......
Well, there you have it. That's the story of my pathetic life. I imagine I will be shamed and told how much of a loser I am and I probably deserve it. Either way, I want to hear what some of you think.
submitted by SpiritPilgrim to AskWomenOver30 [link] [comments]
I'm going through a very rough time emotionally and spiritually and have always found peace when I express my thoughts by writing them out so I figured I would find a Subreddit to express myself and see what strangers who are impartial to my situation will say. There's always two sides to a story, so I'll be mindful to not sit here like a narcissist trying to paint a holy picture of myself and an unholy one of her. I pledge to be completely honest, even if I am burned at the stake in the comments for any wrongdoings of mine. Please note there's a limit to how many characters I can type in here, so 20 years of history for important context will need to be summarized as much as possible. I'll do my best to keep it relevant and share the parts that matter.
In my first year of high school at age 13, a friend of mine was dating a girl from a different high school that he would bring around to hang out with us. She seemed like a nice girl as far as I could tell, but I couldn't help but notice how literally everyone who had something to say about her would always highlight and emphasize that she was a slut and they would tell stories about stuff she has done when she was drunk. I didn't think much of it at the time because why would I? It had nothing to do with me. Soon after, I moved to a different high school and cut ties with that friend.
A few years went by, and one day out of nowhere to my surprise, she called my house to say hi, and to see if I wanted to hang out. I decided to hang out with her because I learned from her that she was no longer dating the guy I met her through, and we were somewhat acquainted already so it felt ok. We started to hang out a lot and I started feeling those fuzzy feelings in my stomach where I knew I was beginning to develop feelings for her, and so much that I was finding myself "borrowing" my dads' car when I didn't yet have my license just to be able to go see her. People around me who knew her started to notice that her and I were getting close, and I started getting warnings from literally dozens of people to not bother with her because she's a slut, and she's just going to hurt me in the end. Despite all these warnings, the feelings I had inside of me for her at that time were too strong to ignore, so I ended up ignoring the warnings people were giving me and wanted to judge her from my experience with her rather than other people's words.
During the time I was hanging out with her, I soon learned that she was apparently seeing or casually dating someone new, which of course bothered me because I liked her and I could feel from her that she liked me too. I started noticing that certain times in evenings she would not answer her phone at all and because I was increasingly growing so in love with her, I literally would begin to sit outside her place down the street in a car just to see what the hell she was doing certain evenings that she wouldn't answer my calls. Of course, it soon became obvious to me that she was going to see this guy she was "seeing" because she would always jump in a taxi very late night and get dropped off at the same house. I'm ashamed when I look back and realize that I was somewhat stalking her and being creepy, but the intentions weren't bad but rather just a little too curious, and it was also killing me inside to see her casually seeing this older guy who I felt was probably just exploiting her for sex. I say that because it was weird to me that she never hung out with him during the day as friends like her and I did but only went to see him late at night, so my mind started messing with me a lot and all the rumours about her started coming in as intrusive thoughts. I'm already a person who has a very deep depth of conscious thoughts so I can sometimes get very deep into my imagination and that's not really a good thing when the mind goes into dark and negative places.
One day during an afternoon I dropped by her house unannounced and I knocked on her house door but no one answered even though I was sure she was home. I went to the side of the house and climbed up on a utility box below her bedroom window that she would always sneak out of, so I can look through the window and maybe get her attention, and I instantly couldn't believe my eyes. There she was butt naked having sex with her ex-boyfriend, the guy I was friends with in early high school. I felt sick to my stomach that I walked right into that so I quickly left to my car and immediately drove off. It was so disturbing to see this and also to realize she was fucking an older guy and also liked me, all three at the same time. I never brought that up to her during that time because it was just too foul to mention. One night, she called me and asked me if I can pick her up from a friend's house because she had too much to drink and couldn't get home safe, so I said okay. When we got to her house, she asked me to help her inside, and so I did and next thing you know when we are sitting on the couch her hands are in my pants, she pulled me into her bedroom, and we had sex for the first time. This was when I lost my virginity.
After this point her and I began to start sleeping with each other regularly and of course it made me love her more and more. I couldn't deal with the circumstance the way it was and so I got very serious with her and let her know I was not cool with what she's doing and that she would need to stop this madness. We got into a lot of arguments and fights about what she was doing and we fought and fought, until one day she suddenly out of nowhere came to me and said she "broke up" with the older guy. She told me she wanted to be official and be a real exclusive couple together with me. I felt this sigh of relief go through me, but also somehow it didn't feel as good as it could've or should've had I not known all these past issues about her.
Here we are suddenly an official couple, and I started realizing that I had this deep insecurity anytime she would say she wanted to go hang out with her girlfriends and "guy friends" to party. I wasn't into drinking and partying at that age and so I would always tell her no, especially if other guys are around, but she didn't care what I had to say and would do what she wanted anyway. When I would try to stop her, she would fight me and tell people that I was being controlling. I felt like I had no power and didn't know what to do because I always thought she will get drunk and do somethign with other guys and that scared the shit out of me.
Soon after I randomly met a girl at a friends house who took interest in me. One day just like that I decided to hang out with her and I ended up cheating on my GF with her. I regret that I did that but looking back on it, I feel like I did it because I was so insecure and upset deep inside at everything I was going through with my GF and her going out partying and drinking with other guys around that I just didn't care anymore and went with it. She eventually found out that I cheated, and demanded I end contact with that girl and I did. I saw that it actually hurt her and I apologized for it and luckily for me she forgave me despite showing serious displeasure. I explained to her that I messed up and I did it because I thought she was likely cheating on me anyways and I had a hard time getting over her past. We both agreed to move on from that. That was when I was 19 and it was the only time I ever cheated on her. I learned from that one mistake I made.
A few more years went by, and still she was giving me a very hard time when it came to going out drinking with her friends. I was working very long 16-hour days at that time, and it never sat well with me for her to go out and get drunk when I'm not present. We continued to fight and argue over this, and she simply never understood me on why I didn't want her to do this. I would do this because I knew that when she drinks, she's not herself at all. She becomes very flirty and inappropriate, and I didn't want that to happen if I'm not around to look after her and stop her from doing dumb shit. Either way, she would do it and ignore what I say. I got fed up with this and ended up breaking up with her. During this time of being broken up, I started trying to see other girls and despite meeting other women in platonic terms, my heart kept wanting her back. So after six months of being broken up, I went back to her and tried to talk to her to see if she wanted to get back together and try to have a fresh start. She immediately showed interest, but she said she had to let me know during the time broken up that she started seeing and having sex with someone else. Despite not offically being a couple at that time, it shattered me. Why? Because I couldn't believe that after everything we went through, she would just go and fuck another dude who was clearly exploiting her for sex. I know that because she dropped him in the snap of a finger to come back to me, so obviously there was nothing of substance there other than her avoiding being alone. I cried about it and ultimately accepted being together again.
Many years went by again and new problems came up, now she is comparing me and us to her friends and their boyfriends. Giving me a hard time that I don't buy her designer bags and spend money on expensive items for her. I would argue with her over this a lot because to me, it was just stupid to be buying junk like this when you don't have too much money to spare, especially at our age, but she didn't care. Every day was arguing and fighting and her putting me down simply for not buying her designer bags. This is when I began to notice that I was starting to get verbally abusive towards her with name calling, belittling and shaming for stuff she's done wrong. There were also many times where I would get physical with her too by grabbing her by the shoulders and shaking her out of frustration during arguments because she would drive me insane with her words. I didn't know how else to express my anger so it always translated mostly into insults about her promiscuity and history. Anyway, eventually I got so fed up with her that I ended up telling her to take a hike and that I don't want to be with her if this is the type of person she's going to be by disturbing the peace in our household with constant comparisons to others. I didn't actually literally mean it when I told her to take a hike and leave and this is something I would often say when we would fight because when I'm angry I feel like I mean it but whenever I would calm down I knew I didn't want her to actually leave. She of course eventually took it literally, and when she did leave this time she immediately started seeing another guy. How did I know? I used 'find my phone' on her iPhone at that time to track her very strange movements and pulled up on her one day while she was with another man. The man shit himself when he seen me, kicked her to the curb and drove off while texting her to forget him. Her reason for doing this was, "you kicked me out, we are not together, and I don't want to be with you". All that just because I didn't buy her chanel and louis vuitton designer bags that her friends boyfriends were buying for them. Me being the low self-esteem insecure loser, I ended up trying to once again work things out with her and reconcile our relationship because I was afraid to lose her and be alone. It's embarassing to admit this but that's the truth.
Again more years went by and I had noticed that a depression and anxiety struggle I had over the years was starting to get pretty bad. Luckily in 2018 I was able to cure my depression in the Amazon Jungle of Peru by participating in several Ayahuasca ceremonies but unfortunately it didn't do anything to help my crippling anxiety. After that trip when I came home from Peru and she was again beginning to show signs of discontent by comparing me to other peoples boyfriends and was giving me a hard time every single day about stupid shit. She was telling me I don't do anything for her, despite over the years sending her on so many vacations with her friends and giving her thousands of dollars of spending money, bankrolling her business she started and so much more. I was taking so much of this from her on a daily basis that it was driving me insane to where I told her once again during the heat of an argument to take a hike if she thinks I'm so bad and of course she did just that. She never stopped to think of all the things that I have done for her but only seemed to focus on what I wasn't doing for her.
After she moved out we still talked regularly and I started noticing she was acting a bit weird. One night I asked her to go out for dinner and drinks and when we got back to the house she passed out drunk and so I went through her phone. I immediately went to her texts and found out she was seeing someone and the texts indicated it was potentially and most likely physical and so of course I lost my shit. I woke her up and confronted her about the texts and I will never forget the smirk she had on her face. I couldn't believe that once again she would do this and especially after fighting over dumb shit like comparing me to others. Everything I learned about this guy she was now seeing indicated she got with him because he appeared to have money. I felt this because she ridiculously and shamelessly stated she liked his Mercedes G-Wagon and all the comparisons to other people and the bad influences she had around her was obvious to me. Sadly, I again let myself down and begged her like a little bitch to stop talking to him and she was not wanting to this time. I was so fucking pathetic that I paid her a very very large six figure sum of cash to come back to me and to leave this guy. Before the cash offer she wasn't showing interest to come back but once I mentioned the money and bought her some jewellery, she suddenly was warming up to wanting to come back to me. I did, however, throw some contingencies in there that she had to come with me to Peru to participate in Ayahausca ceremonies because I felt like she had some serious internal issues and traumas that she also needed to sort out to change for the better. I felt like the reason she was always behaving so reckless and so concerned with other peoples lives and all these comparisons was because of some deep rooted traumas. I say this because she grew up without a father and without money so this is something I always considered about her and kept in mind. Participating in Ayahuasca circles really opened my eyes to trauma and behavior issues we humans have from stuff in our childhood so I knew all these messed up things she's doing stems from a root cause of something in her early life experience. It was certainly the reason why I needed healing because I had my own traumas from my childhood that was affecting my life and behavioir as well. Anyway, she hesitantly agreed and we went to Peru together. When we were in the jungle I felt her energy during one particular Ayahuasca ceremony and she seemed very scared and showing a side of her that I didn't see before. I knew right then and there that she is suffering from something in her soul that that she wasn't even aware of. I always did notice and pickup on her very serious lack of self awareness that she still seems to struggle with to this very day.
We got back home and everything seemed alright. I started noticing she was different in a way I hadn't witnessed before. Different in terms of her energy and her aura. One day she suddenly out of no where told me "after ayahuasca, looking back on myself, I feel like I was possessed by something very dark considering how I used to behave" .. She was referrng to her reckless beahvior and essentially saying she can't even believe her own past behavior and feels like she wasnt herself and now she is waking up and snapping out of it. I swear to god I cried tears of relief when she said this to me and I felt like maybe, just maybe we can have a normal life now. She also at this same time made a promise to me that she would never ever repeat those same behaviors again and that even if we were fighting one day and separated temporarily on a break for whatever reason, that she would give me the respect of letting me know before she talks to or dates any other men. Sounded very good to me of course.
Well, unfortunately Ayahuasca isn't a one trick pony and often times it requires many many ceremonies to fully heal deep rooted subconscious traumas and if you don't go back and finish what you started, you can slip back into old habits especially if you don't put in the work to change from the lessons you learn. I can only speak for myself and can say that I was still not doing too well with my anxiety and I wanted to go back to Peru again to do more work on myself. This time I left to Peru in 2021 and when I came back she was again suddenly being so nasty and mean to me when I was in an energetically sensitive state. Once again every single day back to comparing me to other men who shower their women with money and saying I never do anything for her like the entire past 17 years of everything I did for her, giving her cash, jewellery, vacations and cars all was nothing. The past didnt matter, it only mattered what I was doing for her in the moment. She drove me so insane for six months straight that one day I blew up and told her to either stop or get out. She decided to pack up and move out on her own. I tried to stop her but she didn't and she went anwyay. Some months went by and we would talk on the phone and she would tell me she realizes she has a lot of work to do on herself and that she is trying to heal herself. I told her great, I'm happy to hear that and I really did feel like maybe she might need this time alone to heal and it could possibly be what she needs. Well, unfortunately for me, she once again revealed to me a little over a month ago that she is talking to another man AGAIN and despite promising me she wouldn't do so without talking to me first, she did anyway. Her reason for breaking her promise is "were not together and I owe you nothing". She went as far as showing me text messages between her and this man from the USA and I asked her why she would rub that in my face and she said "I showed you that text so you can see that there are real men out there who wont just give bread crumbs to their woman". According to her, all I ever gave her was bread crumbs despite spending hundreds of thousands of dollars of my own money on her over the years, I am now being measured up with random men she met on dating apps. Here's the kicker, we dont live in the USA and she's been talking about wanting to move there for the last couple of years. Interesting how she now suddenly is speaking to a man online from there. You can draw your own conclusion on the motive for that.
The sad part of this all is that despite the resentment, I still love her......
Well, there you have it. That's the story of my pathetic life. I imagine I will be shamed and told how much of a loser I am and I probably deserve it. Either way, I want to hear what some of you think.
2024.05.29 05:58 Mustardman32 Looking for a small digital camera for backpacking
I like taking a lot of pictures on backpacking trips. I’ve been using my iPhone camera and i can’t help but feel like an actual camera could capture things better. I’m looking for something small, relatively light, at least a little bit weatherproof, and can take better pictures than my iPhone. I don’t know anything about cameras so some recommendations would be appreciated!
submitted by Mustardman32 to Cameras [link] [comments]
2024.05.29 05:52 anonwifey2019 Difficulty accessing medical care due to brain thinking in images of words instead of sounds
Hey gang!
I am largely nonverbal and need to communicate in writing with doctors. Unfortunately I cannot find any who will communicate with me that way. They all insist I speak and when I do they always misunderstand me. I ask them to read notes I write or my phone and they basically never do. The only time a doctor read my stuff was because his nurse did first and insisted he needed to too. The rest of the time they brush me off.
I've been managing complex chronic issues completely alone for years and I'm in crisis now but nobody understands me and I don't have access to old medical records which were always only a fraction of the picture.
Give me ideas guys!
How do I find a doctor, medical school student or biohacker irl who was up for mcgyvering outside the ridiculous world of American healthcare?
Nobody has ever doctored me better than me. But I don't have resources or a body double.
Has anyone else had success in a similar situation?
submitted by anonwifey2019 to autism [link] [comments]
I am largely nonverbal and need to communicate in writing with doctors. Unfortunately I cannot find any who will communicate with me that way. They all insist I speak and when I do they always misunderstand me. I ask them to read notes I write or my phone and they basically never do. The only time a doctor read my stuff was because his nurse did first and insisted he needed to too. The rest of the time they brush me off.
I've been managing complex chronic issues completely alone for years and I'm in crisis now but nobody understands me and I don't have access to old medical records which were always only a fraction of the picture.
Give me ideas guys!
How do I find a doctor, medical school student or biohacker irl who was up for mcgyvering outside the ridiculous world of American healthcare?
Nobody has ever doctored me better than me. But I don't have resources or a body double.
Has anyone else had success in a similar situation?
2024.05.29 05:51 reagantrex Visualization portrait of me & daughter - Digital. $50-$100
Hello!! I’ve been improving my life dramatically in the last year and a half, from 310lbs, severely depressed, and broke to 250lbs, strong & positive, and well… still broke for now but better job and happy where I am lol
I’m nowhere near where I want to get yet and I want to help myself visualize my goals by having a wallpaper on my phone of what I picture I’ll look like after continuing to put in the hard work so I can see it every day.
I’m not picky about style as long as it’s not cartoonish/anime, and I’ll give guidelines but you’re definitely allowed to use your own idea of what we will look like a couple years older. I have no idea what this would cost nowadays - it’s been a couple years since I commissioned something. If my budget above is too low, I’m willing to go higher if you make a fair case (hours required, what other portraits usually go for, art style used, that kind of thing).
submitted by reagantrex to artcommissions [link] [comments]
I’m nowhere near where I want to get yet and I want to help myself visualize my goals by having a wallpaper on my phone of what I picture I’ll look like after continuing to put in the hard work so I can see it every day.
Actual design:
I have a picture of me holding my daughter I love to bits and it’s my favorite one I’ve taken so far. It’s my current Lock Screen. I want a design that follows the same structure of the picture but what I envision us to look like in the future instead.I’m not picky about style as long as it’s not cartoonish/anime, and I’ll give guidelines but you’re definitely allowed to use your own idea of what we will look like a couple years older. I have no idea what this would cost nowadays - it’s been a couple years since I commissioned something. If my budget above is too low, I’m willing to go higher if you make a fair case (hours required, what other portraits usually go for, art style used, that kind of thing).
2024.05.29 05:47 GuiltlessMaple Best 22 Scope
 | submitted by GuiltlessMaple to u/GuiltlessMaple [link] [comments] https://preview.redd.it/pe4w28irea3d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a37edfa428b0e084bbfeb6d5c9638c0cd6c71608 Are you on the lookout for the perfect scope to elevate your outdoor adventures? Look no further! We've compiled a list of the top 22 scopes on the market, designed to provide you with breathtaking clarity and accuracy. From hunting to target shooting, these scopes have got you covered. The Top 15 Best 22 Scope
Reviews🔗Killer Instinct Lumix Speedring Crossbow Scope: Improved Targeting for Huntinghttps://preview.redd.it/pejxzkurea3d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=39d69d95ea8bc434d5a7c66d99ba114b2ae59a45 Using the Killer Instinct MSCKI-1020 Lumix Speedring 1.5 to 5 x 32 IR-E Crossbow Scope has been quite an experience. The scope has made hunting much more enjoyable for me, thanks to its amazing abilities to lock onto and track moving targets from vast distances. One of the features that really stood out is the durability of the metal case. This thing has a real tank-like feel to it, resisting impacts and harsh weather as if it was made for it. The spring-loaded covers on the lenses also proved to be quite reliable, keeping the lenses safe and scratchless until I was ready to hunt. The built-in Speed Ring is another aspect of the scope that has impressed me. Making adjustments for my crossbow's speed has been a breeze, and the illuminated reticle is a big help when it comes to sighting in low-light conditions. I particularly appreciate the contrast the red/blue illumination provides. However, there was one downside that I found a little disturbing. The scope came in a condition that made it apparent that someone had used it before. I was not happy with this fact, especially considering I had paid for a brand new product. Overall, the MSCKI-1020 Lumix Speedring 1.5 to 5 x 32 IR-E Crossbow Scope is a product that I would recommend, even with its minor fault. It certainly helped me become a better hunter, and it would do the same for anyone looking to enhance their hunting experience. 🔗Killer Instinct Lumix 4x32 Black Ir-E Crossbow Scope with LED Illuminationhttps://preview.redd.it/xo2p4cbsea3d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7dc8d4a6f97ab8271097530a44fb938137854f3f I recently had the opportunity to try out the Killer Instinct Lumix 4x32 Ir-E Crossbow Scope. This black 1021 model was a great addition to my hunting gear, providing exceptional clarity thanks to its multicoated optics and 1-inch mono tube construction. The fast focus eyepiece is a game-changer, allowing me to quickly adjust my sight even when on the move. One feature that stood out was the illuminated cross-hair reticle, which came in both blue and red. It was perfect for low-light situations, making it easier for me to spot my target. I appreciated the adjustment click value of 0.5 inches at 100 yards, as it gave me accurate and consistent shot adjustments. However, there were a few downsides to this otherwise great scope. The exit pupil was smaller than I would have liked, making it a bit more challenging to see the cross-hair reticle at times. Additionally, the scope's weight was lighter than expected, which might not have been ideal for everyone. Overall, I'm happy with my experience using the Killer Instinct Lumix 4x32 Ir-E Crossbow Scope. It's a quality product with some small drawbacks, but its pros certainly outweigh the cons. If you're in the market for a reliable crossbow scope, this one is definitely worth considering. 🔗High-Quality 25-75x70 Spotting Scope with Phone Adapterhttps://preview.redd.it/r2q8k4ssea3d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a26157866b902cca9c4ff439f6ece991026b11d4 In my pursuit of a new spotting scope that could enhance my wildlife viewing and target shooting experiences, I stumbled upon the SVBONY SV28 Spotting Scopes. From the moment I opened the package, I was impressed by its sleek exterior and sturdy construction. One feature that stood out to me was its range of magnification capabilities - the SV28 allowed me to adjust the magnification according to my target distance, providing crystal clear image quality. The lens was exceptionally sharp, making it perfect for both target shooting and observing nature. Another aspect I appreciated was the ease of focus adjustment, ensuring that every detail was visible no matter the distance. However, I have to say that the tripod that came with the unit seemed a bit lackluster compared to my usual tripod. I ended up using my own sturdier tripod, but it was still nice to have the option included in the package. Additionally, while the phone adapter was a nice addition, I felt it could have been more user-friendly. Overall, the SVBONY SV28 Spotting Scopes exceeded my expectations, offering outstanding clarity and exceptional value for its price. Though there were a few minor quibbles, I would definitely recommend it to others in search of a reliable, affordable spotting scope for their outdoor adventures. 🔗UHD Spotting Scope with Apochromatic Lens System and Advanced Fully Multi-Coated Lenseshttps://preview.redd.it/xfa8bc1tea3d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=89d5ff32d621468ac2988a439bfce0f7e5197bf7 In the world of optics, the Athlon Optics Ares G2 UHD 20-60x85 Straight Spotting Scope has made a name for itself. It's not just for the birders spotting variances in plumage from far away or for the precision shooters who aim for targets at 1,000 yards, the scope's extra-low dispersion glass provides vivid clarity and resolution in a full-size spotting scope. Athlon has cleverly designed it to be lightweight although strong, making it comfortable to carry and use for long periods. The aluminum alloy chassis adds to its strength without making it too heavy. With its twist-up eye-cup, it allows you to set the eyecup to the perfect eye relief for your eyes, ensuring a comfortable viewing experience. Its ESP Dielectric Coating gives you an advantage in viewing with an image that has little or no chromatic fringe for the clearest and sharpest image. The UHD Glass in the lens helps in converging refracting colors into one focus point, producing greater contrast, sharpness, and color definition. Reflecting over 99% of the light to your eyes, the scope brings you a clear, bright image and accurate color reproduction, thanks to the BaK4 Prisms coupled with advanced fully multi-coated lenses. It produces perfect brightness and color across the entire light spectrum, making viewing under different lighting conditions a breeze. And when it comes to durability, the scope doesn't disappoint. It comes with an extra protective layer coating that keeps the exterior of the lens free from dirt and scratches. It's also Argon Purged and Waterproof, ensuring weatherproof performance even in harsh conditions. Purging allows for better waterproofing/fogging, making sure your scope doesn't fog up when you switch environments. Overall, it's a joy to use this spotting scope. It's not just about viewing in high detail but also the ease it offers in using it. You won't be disappointed with its performance and features. 🔗Athlon Optics Talos 20-60x80 Spotting Scope - High-Performance, Fully Multi-Coated Waterproof Sc scopehttps://preview.redd.it/3kay3vetea3d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=536f0235c43fd5f97ae024f4b38c60f98c52d512 I recently got a chance to use the Athlon Optics Talos 20-60x80 Spotting Scope, and I must say I was quite impressed with its performance. To begin with, the scope is surprisingly lightweight, which makes it perfect for outdoor use. Its waterproof feature is an added bonus, allowing me to use it in harsh weather conditions without any worries. One of the standout features of this spotting scope is its fully multi-coated lenses, which provide incredible light transmission, resulting in bright and clear images. This feature is particularly useful for birdwatching or spotting objects in the distance. The K9 glass prisms with the silver coating help reflect a lot of light to your eyes, creating a bright image. Combined with the multi-coated layering, you get optimal brightness, making it easier to spot your target. The Talos scope is perfect for my needs, whether I'm shooting at the range or observing nature. Its fog-proof construction ensures that my images will always be crisp and clear, no matter the conditions. The included tripod is a great addition, providing a stable platform for comfortable and easy viewing. However, the rotating ring could have been more comfortable and easier to adjust. But overall, the Athlon Optics Talos 20-60x80 Spotting Scope is an excellent choice for anyone looking for a high-quality spotting scope at an affordable price. 🔗Affordable Budget Spotting Scope with Advanced Featureshttps://preview.redd.it/65veh83uea3d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=44b6911b3fea5250e1c638aec6a41bf6f8501688 The Athlon Talos Spotting Scope has been a game-changer for my hunting trips. With its fully multi-coated lenses, the scope has breathed life into the game, allowing me to see the smallest details on my targets. It has a solid build with a waterproof and fog-proof body, perfect for the unpredictable weather conditions of nature. One of the first things that caught my attention was its adjustable rotating ring, which allowed me to position the scope in the most comfortable angle for observation. This gave me a sense of control and comfort while I was out in the wild. However, one aspect that could have been improved was the tripod, which felt a bit flimsy. But thankfully, I was able to replace it with a more robust one as per my preference. Despite its minor drawbacks, the Athlon Talos Spotting Scope has been a reliable companion on my hunting expeditions. It has provided me with clear, bright images, allowing me to make accurate shots and successfully bag my targets. It's the perfect tool for the avid hunter who's looking for a good-quality scope without breaking the bank. 🔗Affordable Vortex Diamondback 20-60x80 Angled Spotting Scope with Fully Multi-Coated Opticshttps://preview.redd.it/07tfo88uea3d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=21259e006152d653176e300a965120365a49f58f I recently got my hands on the Vortex Diamondback 20-60x80 spotting scope, and I must say, it has been a game-changer for my outdoor hobbies. The 20-60x zoom eyepiece is a fantastic feature that provides incredible clarity and detail, especially in low light conditions. One of the things that stood out to me was the single wide focus knob, which is incredibly smooth and easy to adjust. It truly feels like a premium scope, yet it doesn't break the bank. The Diamondback 20-60x80's exterior lenses are protected by the scratch-resistant ArmorTek coating. This has been invaluable when I've taken the scope on various outings where it might be exposed to dirt or other elements. The fact that the scopes are waterproof and nitrogen-purged is a great bonus as well. One of the best features of this spotting scope is the fully rotatable mounting bracket. It's incredibly convenient, allowing me to get the perfect position regardless of where I'm set up. The spotting scope is more versatile than I had imagined, and it has proven to be quite a valuable addition to my outdoor gear. While the product does have a few drawbacks, such as slightly coarser focus control at higher magnifications, overall I am beyond thrilled with my purchase. The Vortex Diamondback 20-60x80 spotting scope has provided me with an exceptional experience, and I couldn't recommend it enough for anyone looking for a great spotting scope at a budget-friendly price. 🔗Portable 150X Astronomical Telescope with 360° Rotation and Multiple Eyepieceshttps://preview.redd.it/3ko3vahvea3d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f86058008c2d2055ec54e978e27b3560ee9322ea The DARTWOOD Astronomical Telescope is a dream come true for stargazers of all levels. Its impressive range of magnification allows for breathtaking views of celestial bodies, while the interchangeable eyepieces ensure a precise adjustment for optimal viewing. I particularly love the 360-degree rotational mount, which makes finding the perfect angle a breeze. Additionally, the strong tripod with locking leg braces provides excellent stability - perfect for outdoor use. Setting up is a cinch, too. All you have to do is open the tripod, attach the telescope, and select your chosen eyepiece. The DARTWOOD Telescope is an incredible tool for exploring the night sky, and I highly recommend giving it a try. 🔗Vortex Razor HD Straight Spotting Scope with Advanced Optics and Ultra-Sleek Designhttps://preview.redd.it/05mxwtmvea3d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3f6f647e85f7e2c6d4595008181a0ebfcd5587e0 Imagine a crisp, clear morning at your favorite shooting range. You unbox your brand new Vortex Razor HD 22-48x65 Straight Spotting Scope. It feels sleek and sturdy, ready for action. You hold it up to the sky, and your eyes quickly adjust to the viewfinder. The HD lens elements showcase a remarkable, edge-to-edge image with remarkable clarity and color accuracy. The angled body design is comfortable and intuitive, even for those who are new to spotting scopes. As you focus on your target at various distances, the fully multi-coated XR lenses provide maximum light transmission, making it effortless to spot and evaluate your game, even in low light conditions. The spotting scope's lightweight design, coupled with its waterproof and fog-resistant features, adds convenience and durability to your experience. Using this Vortex Razor HD 22-48x65 Straight Spotting Scope has been a game-changer for my shooting range sessions. It's been an excellent partner on my hunting trips, allowing me to spot game from a distance, making my outdoor experiences even more enjoyable and successful. With this spotting scope, you can truly observe the world in high definition, and it's all thanks to Vortex's commitment to quality and innovation. 🔗Vortex Razor HD 22-48x65 Angled Spotting Scope: Premium HD Glass, Fully Multi-Coated Lenses, and Versatile Angled Designhttps://preview.redd.it/wz3gyf5wea3d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5e99177a7c948a90e4e303243505dbbb3aa5385a The Vortex Razor HD spotting scope has become a faithful companion on my outdoor adventures. With its angled body design, it offers a comfortable viewing experience, even on extended use. The 65mm objective lens is a game-changer when it comes to providing a clear picture, making it perfect for early morning or late afternoon sightings. The powerful 22-48x magnification has been a real highlight during my time spent outdoors. It has enabled me to spot even the smallest details at a distance, leaving nothing out of sight. The spotting scope's ability to capture bright, clear, true-color images is truly impressive. The premium high-density glass delivers unparalleled edge-to-edge sharpness, making it an exceptional choice for bird watching or wildlife observation. One of my favorite features is the fully multi-coated lenses, which increase light transmission and reduce glare. The dielectric prism coatings provide true-to-life color fidelity, making it easier for me to identify and appreciate the intricate details of my surroundings. The sleek, rugged design of the scope, with its die-cast aluminum alloy construction and rubber armor, has proven to be durable and weather-resistant. It is waterproof and fog resistant, ensuring that it continues to deliver great results in any condition. In summary, the Vortex Razor HD spotting scope is a high-quality, versatile, and user-friendly tool for those who enjoy spending time outdoors. Its exceptional features make it an invaluable addition to my outdoor gear collection. 🔗Portable 72mm APO Refractor with 10:1 Dual-Speed Focuser and Aluminum Casehttps://preview.redd.it/brnuc9iwea3d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2edda0075970ea3efb295a2ead5d32c05c6af6e8 Imagine the Sky-Watcher Evostar 72 APO Refractor as your trusty companion for stargazing adventures. It's not just a telescope; it's a portable travel size designed to make your celestial journeys seamless and hassle-free. One of the standout features of this refractor is its 10:1 dual-speed Crayford-style focuser. It makes finding focus a breeze, whether you're using an eyepiece or a camera. No more frustrating adjustments; just smooth, accurate focus every time. But what about the accessories? The Evostar 72 comes complete with an aluminum case, tube rings, and a Vixen-style dovetail. Everything you need to start exploring the cosmos is right there in the box. However, there's always room for improvement. The scope is a bit heavy at 11.25 lb, which might be a drawback for some users. Also, the Vixen-style dovetail plate could be longer for better compatibility with various mount heads. Despite these minor drawbacks, the Sky-Watcher Evostar 72 APO Refractor offers tremendous value for its price. Its portability, ease of use, and excellent optics make it an excellent choice for both beginners and experienced astronomers alike. So, next time you're planning a stargazing trip, consider bringing this reliable companion along. 🔗Waterproof 8x22 Golf Scope with Intrinsic Range Finderhttps://preview.redd.it/4jspgnpwea3d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=570d3377cfad191ea7aae5e22c292329c1c9e0c4 As someone who's enjoyed using the Barska 8x22 Waterproof Blueline Golf Scope, I can say it has been a handy tool on the golf course. With its crystal clear perspective, I've appreciated the ease of gauging distance between the ball and the pin. However, I must note that accuracy can be a bit challenging if the flagstaff is partially obstructed, often requiring some strategic alignment and calculation. The rubberised coating and waterproof design have proven to be reliable even in unfavorable weather conditions. I've received compliments from fellow golf enthusiasts for the neat leatherette pouch that accompanies it. It's been a compact yet practical companion on the course, slipping easily into my golf bag. One downside I encountered was the absence of an electronic range finder, which required me to rely on calculations from the distance scale. This did call for a bit of math, but once you get the hang of it, it's not a deal-breaker. Overall, the Barska Blueline 8x22 Golf Scope has served me well, offering a cost-effective and portable alternative to digital range finders. Its crystal clear vision and waterproof construction have been highlights of my golfing experience. While it requires a bit more calculation than a high-tech range finder, it's been a reliable companion that's added convenience and precision to my golf game. 🔗Barska Blackhawk 25-75x100 Angled Spotting Scope with Hard Casehttps://preview.redd.it/81ifx5axea3d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c83c13dd434c586e1db8f387da35accceb68e767 I recently had the opportunity to use the Barska Blackhawk 25-75x100 Angled Spotting Scope for an outdoor adventure, and let me tell you, it has truly exceeded my expectations. The spotting scope's magnification range of 25-75x allows for some incredible depth perception and detail while observing nature from afar. The 25x setting is perfect for bird-watching, while the 75x setting is ideal for spotting your favorite animals at a greater distance. One of the features that stood out to me is the shock-absorbing armor on the scope, ensuring that it remains durable and resistant to damage during transport. The scope also comes with glare-reducing sunshades, making it perfect for outdoor use in various lighting conditions. Additionally, the included tripod with micrO-adjustable altitude is a fantastic touch, providing a stable and easily adjustable platform for your spotting scope. Overall, I am extremely pleased with the Barska Blackhawk 25-75x100 Angled Spotting Scope, and I highly recommend it to anyone looking for a high-quality, versatile optic solution for their next outdoor adventure. 🔗TrailSeeker 100 Spotting Scope: Versatile & High-Performance 22-67x Magnification Optichttps://preview.redd.it/fczrlbfxea3d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=24b03666a3f427281a1a3f0d9642640c550a49db I recently had the chance to use the Celestron TrailSeeker 100 spotting scope, and I must say, it exceeded my expectations. As a birdwatcher, I was looking for a reliable and affordable option to enhance my viewing experience, and the TrailSeeker provided just that. One of the standout features of this spotting scope is the versatile 22-67x zoom eyepiece. It allowed me to explore everything from wide landscapes to the tiniest details, giving me a full range of possibilities. The image quality was exceptional, with the Celestron's proprietary XLT fully multi-coated optics delivering crisp, high-contrast images. The rotating tripod mount was another highlight, as it enabled me to adjust the scope's position effortlessly and catch the perfect shot. Its 360-degree rotation provided unparalleled flexibility, allowing me to enjoy the view from any angle. However, there were a couple of aspects that could have been improved. The focus mechanism, while functional, could have been smoother, and the carrying case could have been more durable. Overall, the Celestron TrailSeeker 100 spotting scope was a great addition to my birdwatching kit, offering an impressive range of features without breaking the bank. 🔗Sky-Watcher Maksutov-Cassegrain 102mm Telescope - Ideal for Planetary Observationhttps://preview.redd.it/irfik4wxea3d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3c0f73a49a7b9f75035728e5d3d4fdc985e87bef I recently had the chance to use the Sky-Watcher Maksutov-Cassegrain 102mm Telescope, and I must say, it did not disappoint. This telescope was a breeze to set up and use, thanks to its lightweight design and user-friendly features. One of the standout features of this telescope is its fully multi-coated optics, which made for some truly stunning views of the night sky. The 102mm aperture size allowed me to observe celestial objects like stars, galaxies, and clusters with remarkable clarity and detail. While setting up the telescope, I found the Vixen-style dovetail plate to be a nice touch, making it easy to attach the scope to a variety of mounts. The included 1.25" visual back also came in handy when swapping out eyepieces for different levels of magnification. However, there were a couple of drawbacks I encountered during my experience with the Maksutov-Cassegrain 102mm Telescope. Firstly, the narrower field of view when compared to similar Schmidt models took some getting used to. Additionally, the telescope required regular collimation, which could be a minor inconvenience for some users. In conclusion, the Sky-Watcher Maksutov-Cassegrain 102mm Telescope is an excellent choice for those looking to explore the night sky in detail. Its portable design and exceptional optical quality make it an ideal grab-and-go option for stargazers of all skill levels. Though the narrower field of view and occasional collimation may be minor drawbacks, the overall experience was undeniably rewarding. Buyer's GuideThe 22 Scope is a popular choice for shooters, hunters, and target enthusiasts due to its accuracy, reliability, and versatility. Before making a purchase, it's essential to consider various factors, such as caliber, barrel length, and cost. This buyer's guide will help you make an informed decision and get the most out of your 22 Scope.Caliberhttps://preview.redd.it/n7ccc48yea3d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=937243e0940e3e26c4fea42099a615b67042b9c9 The most common caliber for 22 Scope is the. 22 Long Rifle (LR). However, there are other options like the. 22 Magnum (Maj) and. 22 WMR (Winchester Rimfire). When choosing a caliber, consider factors such as recoil, velocity, and bullet type. The. 22 LR has the least recoil and is suitable for beginners or those who prefer a more gentle firing experience. The. 22 Magnum offers greater velocity and energy, making it ideal for hunting or long-range shooting. Barrel LengthThe 22 Scope barrel length can range from 16 inches to 26 inches. The shorter barrels offer more maneuverability, especially in tight spaces or for use in a defensive setting. Longer barrels provide increased accuracy and velocity. For hunting or target shooting, a 20-22 inches barrel is generally recommended, providing a good balance between accuracy, velocity, and maneuverability.ActionThe action of a 22 Scope can be bolt-action, semi-automatic, or pump-action. Bolt-action rifles offer a reliable, easy-to-use mechanism and are suitable for hunting or target shooting. Semi-automatic rifles provide faster follow-up shots, making them a popular choice for competitive shooting or hunting where a rapid shot sequence is desired. Pump-action rifles are also known for their reliability and quick follow-up shots, often preferred for self-defense purposes. https://preview.redd.it/plh6v8oyea3d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b8ab242e8a1436a5c0f444365158752b23a4e06a Other Features to Consider
Maintenance and StorageRegularly maintaining and storing your 22 Scope can extend its lifespan and ensure reliable performance. After each shooting session, clean the rifle thoroughly, checking for any damage or wear. Store the rifle in a secure, dry place away from extreme temperature or humidity fluctuations. Regular cleaning and proper storage help maintain accuracy and prevent corrosion.The 22 Scope is a versatile and reliable choice for various shooting activities. By considering factors such as caliber, barrel length, and action, you can select the best 22 Scope for your specific needs. Always prioritize safety and accuracy, and with proper maintenance, your 22 Scope will provide reliable and enjoyable shooting experiences for years to come. FAQhttps://preview.redd.it/fxm508a0fa3d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=bde28b4188dac0a9ba6e928710cd298d3b0e9485 What is a 22 scope and how does it differ from other scopes?A 22 scope is a type of rifle scope designed specifically for use with. 22 rimfire rifles. It offers a more compact and lightweight design compared to traditional scopes, making it ideal for hunters and target shooters who prefer a lighter rifle setup. Its smaller size and weight also make it a popular choice for beginners and recreational shooters.What are the key features of a 22 scope?
https://preview.redd.it/tqqgohf0fa3d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7bac65cd2aa7803b7bdb66c241155a8fb984845f What is the best 22 scope for hunting?The best 22 scope for hunting will depend on your specific needs and preferences. Factors to consider include the scope's magnification range, reticle type, and overall durability and weather resistance. In general, a 22 scope with variable magnification and a reliable reticle such as the Mil-Dot or Duplex is a popular choice among hunters.What is the best 22 scope for target shooting?When it comes to target shooting, a fixed-power 22 scope with a higher magnification range (such as 4X or 6X) can be a great choice. This allows for increased accuracy and precision at extended distances. Additionally, a scope with a mil-dot or BDC reticle can be helpful for making accurate distance calculations.How much does a good 22 scope cost?The cost of a 22 scope can vary depending on the brand, features, and quality of the scope. On average, a good quality 22 scope can range from $200 to $500. However, there are affordable options available for those on a budget, as well as more expensive models for serious hunters and shooters.Can I use a 22 scope with other types of rifles?While a 22 scope is designed for use with. 22 rimfire rifles, it can potentially be adapted for use with other rifle types by changing the mounting system or installing an appropriate adapter. However, this may not always provide the best performance or accuracy, so it is generally recommended to use a scope specifically designed for the rifle you are using.What are the most popular brands of 22 scopes?
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2024.05.29 05:44 Beast_Man_1334 Ghost Tour in Gettysburg PA
 | These are pictures my daughter took during a ghost tour on Gettysburg PA. The first 2 you can see almost a complete apparition as well as many faces. She has an older phone so her camera caught great detail. Unfortunately my phone being a Google pixel kept auto fixing the photos. submitted by Beast_Man_1334 to Paranormal [link] [comments] |
2024.05.29 05:38 EarlyZoomer SSL Issue?
I was given a domain by a dear friend of mine for my Graphic Design business about 7 months ago. I have no idea how to use it and it is very basic to say the least. I’m not expecting anything insane to come from it as I don’t know how to code but I would at least like to be able to upload new pictures and posts on it at some point instead of just having a logo and phone number. I already have an https address and it is insisting that there is an SSL issue and the server is not secure. I am not getting straight answers from Google and I honestly have no idea what much of this means. I would like my business to expand but I feel like my bare website is holding me back.
submitted by EarlyZoomer to Wordpress [link] [comments]
2024.05.29 05:36 SexyKanyeBalls Trash ass phone decided to complete freeze on this screen when I was driving not knowing where I was going just cuz I wanted to take a picture
 | submitted by SexyKanyeBalls to Pixel7Pro [link] [comments] |
2024.05.29 05:35 carlweaver “Customer didn’t get her order” nonsense
I got a call this evening from IC customer service. A woman I had just delivered to said the delivery wasn’t there when she went to look for it. I was about a mile away, so I went to see if I put it in the wrong place or something. Nope, it was right there in front of her door. I had customer service still on the phone, grabbed the bag, and verified the address. Yep, all correct. The customer must have heard me talking to the agent on the phone and came to get the groceries. She said they weren’t there before.
It was the right address. She simply had not looked outside or something. There’s no way to miss a bag of food on your stoop. Customer service said the customer was suspect of the whole experience and didn’t want to look at the picture of her delivered food.
I don’t get it. Not sure what all that was about. I fussed at the CS guy a bit though for taking me away from getting another order because I had to deal with that nonsense.
submitted by carlweaver to InstacartShoppers [link] [comments]
It was the right address. She simply had not looked outside or something. There’s no way to miss a bag of food on your stoop. Customer service said the customer was suspect of the whole experience and didn’t want to look at the picture of her delivered food.
I don’t get it. Not sure what all that was about. I fussed at the CS guy a bit though for taking me away from getting another order because I had to deal with that nonsense.
2024.05.29 05:28 LemonDropRush Need advice on urgency of cat aural hematoma
My beautiful eight-year-old cat has what I think is aural hematoma. Vet also thinks this as conveyed over the phone after hearing description. She thinks this is likely due to her cardio meds (blood thinners). Vet told me to check gums for speckling and/or paleness. As gums appear to be a normal color, she said I could wait for 2 days for my cat to be seen (first possible opening). The swelling proceeded to sag toward her cheek and then her neck (same side as hematoma) throughout the late afternoon and evening. Now she kind of looks like she has a goiter around her neck, and although her ear is still swollen and hot to the touch, the ear is not sagging as much. It’s almost as if the fluid/ blood in her ear drained slowly towards the chin.
This is where opinions are needed. Do I haul my ass(and kittty’s ear) to the emergency veterinary clinic, or do I wait until Thursday late afternoon to get kitty seen by her regula primary vet?
All opinions and advice are valued. Thanks in advance.
Other info: domestic short hair, supposedly part Siamese. Hypertrophic cardiomyopathy diagnosed around Feb/March of this year, preceded by blood clot. Clot was resolved within 3-4 days by blood thinners. Currently on various heart related medications. Liver values elevated so had been tapering off of one of the blood thinners. Aside from this current acute incident and the blood clot, she is a playful, affectionate, athletic cat with a strong appetite. Outwardly she is the picture of health.
submitted by LemonDropRush to AskVet [link] [comments]
This is where opinions are needed. Do I haul my ass(and kittty’s ear) to the emergency veterinary clinic, or do I wait until Thursday late afternoon to get kitty seen by her regula primary vet?
All opinions and advice are valued. Thanks in advance.
Other info: domestic short hair, supposedly part Siamese. Hypertrophic cardiomyopathy diagnosed around Feb/March of this year, preceded by blood clot. Clot was resolved within 3-4 days by blood thinners. Currently on various heart related medications. Liver values elevated so had been tapering off of one of the blood thinners. Aside from this current acute incident and the blood clot, she is a playful, affectionate, athletic cat with a strong appetite. Outwardly she is the picture of health.
2024.05.29 05:27 Positive-Light-7032 AITA/ Bridezilla - For standing up for my happiness n not allowing my siblings/ family and friends ruin our day.
Please bare with me as this will be a long one, it's my first ever post on reddit.
TW of child loss.
I (32f) my FH (35m) are getting married august this year. We live in Australia in a different state to both sides of our family. As we thought instead of picking between the two states we are from, we will have it where we are now.
History as I know all you lot love the background stories. We met in 2019, through tinder(in the state we currently both are atm). It was love at first sight for me. I already had a son who in 2019 was 8yo. My son adorned my partner, he would talk about future siblings and us getting married. Which led my partner n I picking wedding songs and talking about marriage. In 2021 my partner n I were a bit rocky. But my world came crashing apart when I got a phone call my son passed in a car crash. I flew back to my home state and well as you can imagine I was a mess. My family which I hadn't spoken to in 4 years due to being accused for something I did not do. They found out I didn't. But long story short I was in the head space to nit pick. My sons funeral happened and well I just got left by all my siblings to do the clean up my self while they went to the after do. I missed it. I'm only one person and I got blamed and made to feel like crap for it. And a lot other shit. In other words three of my siblings are arseholes. If they dont get their way. My sister we'll call her Petal(24), brothers Steve (31) n Bob (27).
My partner n I always stayed in contact but we spilt as he was still in the state we met. His boss wouldn't let him take time off etc. In the beginning 2023 I came back to the state to organise my sons stuff. Realising this man kept everything of his and mine in the same spot. He still looked after my cat n dog after all that time also. We rekindled and both realised the flame was always still there for each other. So by September last year we were ready to move forward with life as short as it is announce to our family's save the dates. Via Txt as we both have huge families, we would save the money this way.
A few weeks go by. I get a phone call from Steve. (Whom I havent spoken to since before coming up here as I had enough of always being cancelled on or never picking up my calls or barely responding to my texts) So I was like why am I getting a call. Turns out I just got questions after questions... well statements 'you never asked me to move' 'mum will be staying with me not you on your wedding' 'im not babysitting joey' youngest brother 12yo we I stated he would be other brother Dale (second youngest 21- they are all my siblings from my mother's side) as they are always together when Dale visits. I just focused on the positive. I knew he was wanting me to bite. Then when I was explaining joey would be walking behind my nieces with my sons photo Steve interrupted when are you getting married and laughed. He then said no, His daughter wasn't going to be wearing a dress she'll be wearing the same as her dad... and laughed. at the beginning of his save the date I put 'Aunty would love niece to be a flower girl if she would like' Remember no contact since this phone call at all. So I thought he was joking as he laughed. He then started repeating she was wearing the same as him. He also asked why would joey be following them and as I was explaining what I was thinking as my son would've wanted his cousins up there with him. I got cut off. I just planned all this and I said no I asked and you never responded. You never said no even when I spoke about the dresses. Apparently I just don't know what no sounds like and I've not changed and she is HIS flower girl for when him and his partner get married. I understand wanting your child to be apart of your wedding.... hence why I was trying to do what I know damn sure my boy would have done - to the point if they weren't in the party he would walk up to them n get them to help throw petal down the isle. I was upset. He rambled on and yelled shit at me and hung up when I said well if you didn't want her being a flower girl you could've just said it straight out.
I am still upset but I'm only upset due to he only brought it up when I was talking about what my son would want. If he had a problem with it why didn't he say it before hand. Later mum(51) found out him n his partner were upset I was getting married before them ( they have been engaged since 2021 and no mention of a wedding date) and they didn't want their daughter being someone else's flower girl before hand. Which again I understand so why not say that instead of starting the shit?
The next day Bob decided to tell me he couldn't come to the wedding as he doesn't know what his life would bring him to be doing then 🤦🏼♀️
Anyway I start to move forward with wedding planning . I let a friend know, as i was going to ask her to be a Bm. After saying getting married she bloody laughed so hard like i told the most funniest joke ever.... her daughter came in she is still laughing n said ' can you believe they are getting married' while wiping away tears from her eyes she laughed so hard. So I decided not to mention the bm part. She later started telling me what I should do for colours, who the bms should be, that the best man wears something different to the groomsmen. Etc. It was getting out of hand and everytime I mentioned we had decided what we are doing already is was wrong .... until she decided to make a competition with my unaware mother 'she better wear a dress or ill look better then her. Maybe even you' so I cut her out of my social group, my partner still thinks she was just helping. He needs the fog to clear.
I ask my best friend who I have known since 2017 and who was still there for me through the hard time of my son passing and still is to this day. Kel(43f) to be my MOH. My two sisters Petal n Kay(28f on father's side) as bridesmaids. As iTs tHe rIgHt tHiNg to do 🤦🏼♀️ at first I thought petal would flake first. If it's not her way she'll make some sort of version (even if it's LIES) that you did her wrong. I picked the dresses they were more then happy to pay for them. $160 ish each(aus). Well Kay went Mia for a few weeks. Then in January this year asked me if the place accepted afterpay. I said I know they accept Kalana or what ever its called. N then she was busting her arse for me to check.... she had the website I asked if she had her flights and accommodation prebooked. Nothing. As I was going to offer to pay for the dress if she was struggling. So I offered for her to come as a guest. 2 weeks NOT A SINGLE WORD. Not answering my calls or texts that wasn't even about the wedding. Its now Feb. I ask my cousin to be a back BM she was more then happy n as I was on the phone to her Kay said ' im getting a job so it'll be all sorted' now Kay is a sister who will take advantage for other people's hand outs. Where we are the closer to august you leave it your looking at 1600 n back minimum. N the week we are getting married not only with it be tourist session but race day also ( we forgot about race day 😅) After explaining this to her she decided with many more weeks in between she'll not come to the wedding at all.
So then it was my BF, petal and cousin.
Two weeks ago I got asked by my fathers (he is a dead beat) sister if he was invited. Long story short, I'm the child he never wanted. He never met my son at all while he was alive and loves to cause drama when it's not about him. He was a junkie when I first met him. So I politely said sorry no he is not and sorry for putting you in this position.
Just up until last week petal flaked. Family drama was happening and I pulled her up on her lies she had put in a group chat. She hadn't spoken to me since May. She would read the wedding chat but not respond. And I found out she had me on mute. Laste week I messaged her on the group chat, our private chat and text her can you aleast let me know whats going on. She came back with ' im not coming nor will I be in your wedding' I thanked her for letting me know. Went in the group chat for the wedding n she had already removed herself. N I blocked her shortly after my mum called. Mum had asked if I had heard from Petal. I told her what happened. Well, mum Being a mum was like 'ill get to the bottom of this' She asked why are you not part of the wedding anymore. My sister turned n said its not of your business. N then said I blocked her from the chat a while ago and I have not once messaged her n I'm mean. Mum caught her out n said she seen her lil picture keep up with the messaged just today etc. N she just banged on how no one understands her. So I blocked her.
I have now asked for my partners Sister to be a bm and she's more then happy to and I paid for her dress straight away so it should arrive to her before she is due to come up.
I found out in April my son will finally be a older brother like he always wanted. This is a miracle baby as I've had a few health problems with my uterus. To the point doctors said I might not even be able to do IVF. My partner n I are over the moon. I am in a a place where I'm happy and upset because my son is not here to witness what he always wanted. We have only told those that have been supportive, mu mum Dale and joey and my Sil.
All the stress of just my family has taken its toll. We have already paid majority of the wedding off and can't elope. I've lost all happiness for our day. I'm scared my father will rock up (he is spiteful like that) n im just deflated. With the add stress of being now 12weeks pregnant and still worried I could lose it at any point.
I have gotten all their jewellery, personalised pjs since Kay was involved. Personalised gifts and im paying for their hair and make up.
Kel my Moh is ready to go on a witch hunt. She's pissed that I have let it all go on for so long. So I'm trying to see if I am in the right or if I am in the wrong.
Am I being the Arsehole ? Bridezilla? Just feels no matter what happens in my life it's not good enough. If anything needs clearing up please let me know. Sorry for the long post. Thankyou in advance And if anyone has any advice ? Thankyou
submitted by Positive-Light-7032 to CharlotteDobreYouTube [link] [comments]
TW of child loss.
I (32f) my FH (35m) are getting married august this year. We live in Australia in a different state to both sides of our family. As we thought instead of picking between the two states we are from, we will have it where we are now.
History as I know all you lot love the background stories. We met in 2019, through tinder(in the state we currently both are atm). It was love at first sight for me. I already had a son who in 2019 was 8yo. My son adorned my partner, he would talk about future siblings and us getting married. Which led my partner n I picking wedding songs and talking about marriage. In 2021 my partner n I were a bit rocky. But my world came crashing apart when I got a phone call my son passed in a car crash. I flew back to my home state and well as you can imagine I was a mess. My family which I hadn't spoken to in 4 years due to being accused for something I did not do. They found out I didn't. But long story short I was in the head space to nit pick. My sons funeral happened and well I just got left by all my siblings to do the clean up my self while they went to the after do. I missed it. I'm only one person and I got blamed and made to feel like crap for it. And a lot other shit. In other words three of my siblings are arseholes. If they dont get their way. My sister we'll call her Petal(24), brothers Steve (31) n Bob (27).
My partner n I always stayed in contact but we spilt as he was still in the state we met. His boss wouldn't let him take time off etc. In the beginning 2023 I came back to the state to organise my sons stuff. Realising this man kept everything of his and mine in the same spot. He still looked after my cat n dog after all that time also. We rekindled and both realised the flame was always still there for each other. So by September last year we were ready to move forward with life as short as it is announce to our family's save the dates. Via Txt as we both have huge families, we would save the money this way.
A few weeks go by. I get a phone call from Steve. (Whom I havent spoken to since before coming up here as I had enough of always being cancelled on or never picking up my calls or barely responding to my texts) So I was like why am I getting a call. Turns out I just got questions after questions... well statements 'you never asked me to move' 'mum will be staying with me not you on your wedding' 'im not babysitting joey' youngest brother 12yo we I stated he would be other brother Dale (second youngest 21- they are all my siblings from my mother's side) as they are always together when Dale visits. I just focused on the positive. I knew he was wanting me to bite. Then when I was explaining joey would be walking behind my nieces with my sons photo Steve interrupted when are you getting married and laughed. He then said no, His daughter wasn't going to be wearing a dress she'll be wearing the same as her dad... and laughed. at the beginning of his save the date I put 'Aunty would love niece to be a flower girl if she would like' Remember no contact since this phone call at all. So I thought he was joking as he laughed. He then started repeating she was wearing the same as him. He also asked why would joey be following them and as I was explaining what I was thinking as my son would've wanted his cousins up there with him. I got cut off. I just planned all this and I said no I asked and you never responded. You never said no even when I spoke about the dresses. Apparently I just don't know what no sounds like and I've not changed and she is HIS flower girl for when him and his partner get married. I understand wanting your child to be apart of your wedding.... hence why I was trying to do what I know damn sure my boy would have done - to the point if they weren't in the party he would walk up to them n get them to help throw petal down the isle. I was upset. He rambled on and yelled shit at me and hung up when I said well if you didn't want her being a flower girl you could've just said it straight out.
I am still upset but I'm only upset due to he only brought it up when I was talking about what my son would want. If he had a problem with it why didn't he say it before hand. Later mum(51) found out him n his partner were upset I was getting married before them ( they have been engaged since 2021 and no mention of a wedding date) and they didn't want their daughter being someone else's flower girl before hand. Which again I understand so why not say that instead of starting the shit?
The next day Bob decided to tell me he couldn't come to the wedding as he doesn't know what his life would bring him to be doing then 🤦🏼♀️
Anyway I start to move forward with wedding planning . I let a friend know, as i was going to ask her to be a Bm. After saying getting married she bloody laughed so hard like i told the most funniest joke ever.... her daughter came in she is still laughing n said ' can you believe they are getting married' while wiping away tears from her eyes she laughed so hard. So I decided not to mention the bm part. She later started telling me what I should do for colours, who the bms should be, that the best man wears something different to the groomsmen. Etc. It was getting out of hand and everytime I mentioned we had decided what we are doing already is was wrong .... until she decided to make a competition with my unaware mother 'she better wear a dress or ill look better then her. Maybe even you' so I cut her out of my social group, my partner still thinks she was just helping. He needs the fog to clear.
I ask my best friend who I have known since 2017 and who was still there for me through the hard time of my son passing and still is to this day. Kel(43f) to be my MOH. My two sisters Petal n Kay(28f on father's side) as bridesmaids. As iTs tHe rIgHt tHiNg to do 🤦🏼♀️ at first I thought petal would flake first. If it's not her way she'll make some sort of version (even if it's LIES) that you did her wrong. I picked the dresses they were more then happy to pay for them. $160 ish each(aus). Well Kay went Mia for a few weeks. Then in January this year asked me if the place accepted afterpay. I said I know they accept Kalana or what ever its called. N then she was busting her arse for me to check.... she had the website I asked if she had her flights and accommodation prebooked. Nothing. As I was going to offer to pay for the dress if she was struggling. So I offered for her to come as a guest. 2 weeks NOT A SINGLE WORD. Not answering my calls or texts that wasn't even about the wedding. Its now Feb. I ask my cousin to be a back BM she was more then happy n as I was on the phone to her Kay said ' im getting a job so it'll be all sorted' now Kay is a sister who will take advantage for other people's hand outs. Where we are the closer to august you leave it your looking at 1600 n back minimum. N the week we are getting married not only with it be tourist session but race day also ( we forgot about race day 😅) After explaining this to her she decided with many more weeks in between she'll not come to the wedding at all.
So then it was my BF, petal and cousin.
Two weeks ago I got asked by my fathers (he is a dead beat) sister if he was invited. Long story short, I'm the child he never wanted. He never met my son at all while he was alive and loves to cause drama when it's not about him. He was a junkie when I first met him. So I politely said sorry no he is not and sorry for putting you in this position.
Just up until last week petal flaked. Family drama was happening and I pulled her up on her lies she had put in a group chat. She hadn't spoken to me since May. She would read the wedding chat but not respond. And I found out she had me on mute. Laste week I messaged her on the group chat, our private chat and text her can you aleast let me know whats going on. She came back with ' im not coming nor will I be in your wedding' I thanked her for letting me know. Went in the group chat for the wedding n she had already removed herself. N I blocked her shortly after my mum called. Mum had asked if I had heard from Petal. I told her what happened. Well, mum Being a mum was like 'ill get to the bottom of this' She asked why are you not part of the wedding anymore. My sister turned n said its not of your business. N then said I blocked her from the chat a while ago and I have not once messaged her n I'm mean. Mum caught her out n said she seen her lil picture keep up with the messaged just today etc. N she just banged on how no one understands her. So I blocked her.
I have now asked for my partners Sister to be a bm and she's more then happy to and I paid for her dress straight away so it should arrive to her before she is due to come up.
I found out in April my son will finally be a older brother like he always wanted. This is a miracle baby as I've had a few health problems with my uterus. To the point doctors said I might not even be able to do IVF. My partner n I are over the moon. I am in a a place where I'm happy and upset because my son is not here to witness what he always wanted. We have only told those that have been supportive, mu mum Dale and joey and my Sil.
All the stress of just my family has taken its toll. We have already paid majority of the wedding off and can't elope. I've lost all happiness for our day. I'm scared my father will rock up (he is spiteful like that) n im just deflated. With the add stress of being now 12weeks pregnant and still worried I could lose it at any point.
I have gotten all their jewellery, personalised pjs since Kay was involved. Personalised gifts and im paying for their hair and make up.
Kel my Moh is ready to go on a witch hunt. She's pissed that I have let it all go on for so long. So I'm trying to see if I am in the right or if I am in the wrong.
Am I being the Arsehole ? Bridezilla? Just feels no matter what happens in my life it's not good enough. If anything needs clearing up please let me know. Sorry for the long post. Thankyou in advance And if anyone has any advice ? Thankyou
2024.05.29 05:26 Realistic_Many_950 Going on 10 years with the stalker
So this is my story , I honestly need advice and for someone to understand me. Here goes nothing ! Back in 2013 I was in a relationship with a guy (Jake ) & he had a child’s mother ( Layla ) . At first I was cordial with Layla because Jake lived with me. However Jake turned out to be a HUGE whore. Well more of a bum . So a bummy whore. Layla wanted her family with him which I understood however he was my boyfriend. She would use the baby to get him to be with her while I was at work. Layla would purposefully post like they were in a relationship knowing that he lived with me . I would attempt to break up with him , he would just beg and tell me lies. I was 20 and stupid. I stayed until one day I was fed up of the back and forth and explained to Jake I was done with the back and forth between Layla & I. At that moment he put a play in action to get me pregnant. He succeeded. I was completely mortified at the fact I was now stuck with this situation. When I posted my pregnancy my car window was busted out . This is where the stalking started. I noticed every hair style I wore she would copy & the outfits , my poses for pictures. Even vacations I took with my kids . I found messages between Layla & Jake . She asked him “what is it about Sophie? That you won’t leave her alone.” My mind was blown that’s not normal for me . After I left Jake for good it didn’t matter . Layla & her friends would watch all of my social media platforms. They constantly bullied me online . Called my phone and told me they hoped my baby would be mentally challenged. Layla had her brother shoot at my new car. She told people she would come to the hospital and punch me off of the hospital bed after I gave birth. The whole time this is taking place . She’s filing restraining orders on me lying to the police trying to have me put in jail. I moved 45 minutes away to get some peace. However that didn’t last they couldn’t physically drive past my house but used social media to harass me. Any guy I was seen with Layla tried to date or even sleep with. I started dating another guy and thought I was free aside from the shade being thrown on the internet. Well that didn’t last for long because once the new guy Rick’s ex Patty caught wind they became a task force bullying me everyday. I had moved back to my town however no one knew where. One day I got fed up and beat Patty up & took her phone 🫣. What I found inside was messages talking about me , pictures of me & my house. Talking about my children and trying to get me fired from my job . Layla was telling Patty my phone number . They said they were going to bully me until I unalived myself. I broke it off with Rick after the gang came to my house and busted my windows out !
I moved on & got pregnant. I thought it was over until one day I realized it wasn’t. Layla at this point spent 6 years studying my online persona. She would tell anyone she meets I’m obsessed with her while she talked , dressed & acted like me. I gained so much weight that I got a butt she went and bought one. Layla moved 10 blocks away from me & then proceeded to move her business 5 minutes away from my house . I started seeing her a the local stores & she would pull up to the pump next to me & sit in her car watching me. After doing this 7 times & reaching out to my mother who I have no relationship with . I was served with a restraining order. I went to court & she admitted in open court that in the last year i did none of the things she stated in the paperwork which got me served in the first place . The cases was dismissed. This happened in 2023 . In 2024 , 7 months later she text me asking to meet up to talk . I did thinking finally she is ready to be an adult & let this shit go ! I was WRONG AF ! She told me I was obsessed with her and I’m crazy ! She said you think about me so much your business wouldn’t be failing if you stopped caring about me . Layla then stated she doesn’t think Is “Sophie wearing panties or a bra.” She brought up my kids and how I’m struggling. Said that she wants to know what wrong with me & “are you in a competition with me”. Brought up my daughter who she’s never seen or met in real life. She knew me & my daughter’s dad wasn’t together.
I don’t want to keep going because it’s way more ! I am scared because how long does it take for someone to move on ! Advice please!!!
submitted by Realistic_Many_950 to Stalking [link] [comments]
I moved on & got pregnant. I thought it was over until one day I realized it wasn’t. Layla at this point spent 6 years studying my online persona. She would tell anyone she meets I’m obsessed with her while she talked , dressed & acted like me. I gained so much weight that I got a butt she went and bought one. Layla moved 10 blocks away from me & then proceeded to move her business 5 minutes away from my house . I started seeing her a the local stores & she would pull up to the pump next to me & sit in her car watching me. After doing this 7 times & reaching out to my mother who I have no relationship with . I was served with a restraining order. I went to court & she admitted in open court that in the last year i did none of the things she stated in the paperwork which got me served in the first place . The cases was dismissed. This happened in 2023 . In 2024 , 7 months later she text me asking to meet up to talk . I did thinking finally she is ready to be an adult & let this shit go ! I was WRONG AF ! She told me I was obsessed with her and I’m crazy ! She said you think about me so much your business wouldn’t be failing if you stopped caring about me . Layla then stated she doesn’t think Is “Sophie wearing panties or a bra.” She brought up my kids and how I’m struggling. Said that she wants to know what wrong with me & “are you in a competition with me”. Brought up my daughter who she’s never seen or met in real life. She knew me & my daughter’s dad wasn’t together.
I don’t want to keep going because it’s way more ! I am scared because how long does it take for someone to move on ! Advice please!!!
2024.05.29 05:25 ThrowRA_skyi AITA for Avoiding My Boyfriend After He Burned a Gift from My Past Relationship?
Me and my boyfriend have been together for two years. Overall, our relationship has been good, but there’s one issue that’s been causing a lot of tension: my past relationship.
Before I met my current boyfriend, I was in a serious relationship with my ex for five years. We ended things on good terms, but we’ve had no contact since the breakup. During our relationship, My mom fought hard but lost to breast cancer and it was a difficult time for me. My ex had made me a locket with a picture of my mom and me inside. This was an incredible gift I cherished and I wear it everyday.
When I started dating my current boyfriend, I was upfront about my past. I never told him about the necklace thought it wouldn’t matter. Later on he found out because I went to take a shower and took the necklace off and he saw because it said from my ex to me. He confronted me about it, I told him the necklace had nothing to do with my ex or our past relationship and it was a very sentimental thing to remember my mom. He seemed fine with it at first, but over time, he started making little comments about it. He would ask why I still had it and whether I still had feelings for my ex. I assured him multiple times that the locket meant nothing about my ex and was strictly a gift to remember my mom.
A few weeks ago, I got out the shower and found the locket was missing. After searching everywhere, I confronted my boyfriend, and he lied about it to me. I didn’t really believe him but I had no reasons to suspect him at the time so I left him alone about it. Few weeks later I’d hadn’t found the locket yet and he had left for a moment to go get something and his phone happened to be open and I glanced at his phone and went through it. Where he bragged about taking my locket to his friends.
I was pissed he lied to my face like that. After he came back I confronted him and he tried to blame me for invading his privacy. I kept pushing until he admitted that he had taken it and burned it because he couldn’t stand the thought of me keeping something from my ex. I was devastated. I couldn’t believe he threw away something so special to me.
We got into a bad argument since then, I’ve been staying with my sister and her family now avoiding him. I can barely look at him, let alone have a conversation. He’s sent me dozens of text apologizing and saying he did it out of love and insecurity. It feels like such a huge betrayal of trust.
I love him but I don’t think I love him enough to forgive him after what he did. I feel like I might be the AH is because I did look through his personal information.
submitted by ThrowRA_skyi to AmItheAsshole [link] [comments]
Before I met my current boyfriend, I was in a serious relationship with my ex for five years. We ended things on good terms, but we’ve had no contact since the breakup. During our relationship, My mom fought hard but lost to breast cancer and it was a difficult time for me. My ex had made me a locket with a picture of my mom and me inside. This was an incredible gift I cherished and I wear it everyday.
When I started dating my current boyfriend, I was upfront about my past. I never told him about the necklace thought it wouldn’t matter. Later on he found out because I went to take a shower and took the necklace off and he saw because it said from my ex to me. He confronted me about it, I told him the necklace had nothing to do with my ex or our past relationship and it was a very sentimental thing to remember my mom. He seemed fine with it at first, but over time, he started making little comments about it. He would ask why I still had it and whether I still had feelings for my ex. I assured him multiple times that the locket meant nothing about my ex and was strictly a gift to remember my mom.
A few weeks ago, I got out the shower and found the locket was missing. After searching everywhere, I confronted my boyfriend, and he lied about it to me. I didn’t really believe him but I had no reasons to suspect him at the time so I left him alone about it. Few weeks later I’d hadn’t found the locket yet and he had left for a moment to go get something and his phone happened to be open and I glanced at his phone and went through it. Where he bragged about taking my locket to his friends.
I was pissed he lied to my face like that. After he came back I confronted him and he tried to blame me for invading his privacy. I kept pushing until he admitted that he had taken it and burned it because he couldn’t stand the thought of me keeping something from my ex. I was devastated. I couldn’t believe he threw away something so special to me.
We got into a bad argument since then, I’ve been staying with my sister and her family now avoiding him. I can barely look at him, let alone have a conversation. He’s sent me dozens of text apologizing and saying he did it out of love and insecurity. It feels like such a huge betrayal of trust.
I love him but I don’t think I love him enough to forgive him after what he did. I feel like I might be the AH is because I did look through his personal information.