Poems for infants and toddlers

This is a question for dads. Because in conversation today my husband told me some things that he declares "all men are like this and is one of the ways men and women think differently"
We have five kids between the two of us. Blended family. Two of the five we have together. A soon to be three year old and an infant. The toddlers birthday is approaching and I asked how he felt about going to my parents at the beach for the weekend and to have a party. We don't see family often since we live few hours away but they will be vacationing at a beach a two hour drive from us. He said he thinks I should just go with the birthday boy and he would stay home with baby.
I asked wouldn't he be bummed to miss his boy on his birthday? He explained, to my surprise, that no. He wouldn't. That first birthdays are important and birthdays where the kids are old enough to know he's there are improtant since it is their memories. Says he couldn't remember the second birthday and that all men are that way. That their brains are not wired to care so much and remember things like birthdays of their children and that I could ask any man if they remember their kids 3rd birthday and they wouldn't be able to. So l ask ok if you don't maintain a memory then what about the moment, life is made of moments and that moment watching your kid feel like the center of universe while having Happy Birthday sung to them is a wonderful moment.
I really really would appreciate other dad's input. My teens dad walked away for good when I had him and now I feel like my second chance at my children having a dad is falling short of my dream... or are my expectations too high? After all I'm not a man and do understand I think differently.
Thank you if you took the time to read this

Was hoping for a clean 100 souls but have 75 instead. Maybe the last 25 can be filled with other DM's/Party's ideas/adventures. I like something unfinished, honestly.
There's some obvious influence/thievery from OSR heavy hitters in here but I've attempted to keep it at a minimum just to inch my way to a clean 75 since 100 is proving troublesome. And honestly I've forgotten where some of these stolen/restructured ideas have come from. Feel free to credit link any so others can know their great works.
(e.g. P. Stuart, D. Selle, Coins and Scrolls, Goblin Punch, Vivien Feasson, S. Princess, Z. Cox/B. Brown, B. Milton, L. Rejec, P. Nilsson)
I doubt all the aforementioned are present in this list but I just wanna cover bases and/or call out incredible minds and effort in the hobby who I've really enjoyed. Call out any unlisted if you please. Credit where credit is due.
Edit: Whoof, formatting again
Edit 2: Cant change some numeration here it seems. Sub-traits are counted as independent entries. Italicized and emboldened sub-traits to help differentiate.
The Stilletto of The Imperator Scum (Trident)
On an (un)natural 20, consume a soul randomly from the table activating its effect, removing it from the table permanently
On a (un)natural 1, the target dies immediately and is resurrected as an undead. Pores on its body explode with rapid growth fungus and it’s health, and spell slots if applicable, are restored to their maximums. Their soul then becomes one with The Stiletto and is added to the table.
Soul of the…:

1. Ardent Giant - +2d6 dmg. to your attacks towards the target. Change the weather to which you desire
2. Befouler - target fucking stinks, if within 15ft Con. Sav 12 every round to keep from vomiting.
3. Gnarled Oak - that target lives the life of a tree in an instant. Witnessing love of child and pet. They see the first kiss of young love with the tip of the blade within their trunk declaring theirs eternal. They bear the burden of parenthood, choked with a child’s swing. The same swing their groom or bride will swing on, in remembrance, decades later. A generation of someones else’s life wears on them in the span of seconds. T
   1. Take 1d4 dmg. from the blade
   2. -2 Wis. as the dog pisses on them (1min duration)
   3. 3d8 dmg. as their branches are cut for a treehouse
   4. They will fall asleep in winter temperatures unable to wake up
   5. As long as their corpse touches soil they will resurrect in unspecified time
   6. If the target is killed within a city (soil or not) they will die sobbing with such penetrating sobbing. Within a mile radius, it lowers all CHA and WIS scores within range by 2 for 24hrs.
4. Devil - the target’s eyes wash with color and your reflection is upside down. They provide you a contract/offer that is too good to pass up. You literally can’t resist it but it’s also a really great deal. Other than the fact that your soul is lost at failure of completion. Unless the killing blow dealt to the Devil is holy damage, they arrive at The Nine Hells to bide their time before they continue their cursed bargains upon the mortal realm.
5. Claviger - The target is compelled to open the nearest door. If not the door, then box/barrel, chest, bag, pocket. Consume their next action. If the object doesn't open, spend each preceding action until it does.
6. Scion of the Slithering Soil - the target embodies the nameless soul of a god-fearing priest of Mi-Shao-Shur. Dedicated fully to Serpentine Ascension by committing acts of gratuitous depravity. They become a beacon for the resurrection of Mi-Shao-Shur by consuming their own flesh, restoring their health to its maximum. Revealing underneath their now-true serpentine forms. Their intelligence increases by 4 and from their mouths can cast the Poison Spray cantrip. The target can now communicate with nearby creatures and convince them to do their bidding.
7. Exploding Toad - target explodes. Dex Sav 13 or take 5d6 fire dmg.
8. Dwarf - target becomes one. Genderless. Immune to all compulsions that play on a desire for sex. No sexual organs. Instead of urinating you excrete waste through sweating, explaining the odor.
9. Tahlia - the target’s soul becomes trapped on the most worthless item on their person that isn’t a weapon or armor. Their body begins to thrash and scream mindlessly. Bodies are full of life and feelings but suffer the penultimate separation anxiety from the soul. The terrified shell will attempt to consume the item worth most to someone nearby with supernatural capacity. If they do so, your item is lost forever and the target becomes whole once more, restoring full health.
10. PorteBasin Filler - Nothing satiates the target’s desire to serve, will seek out more and more challenging tasks for such a talented valet
11. Abhorrer - target is unable to be targeted with any malice. The hate within you boils still but physically you are unable to be anything but be cordial and polite to the target. The creature knows every law and obeys them. It will use the law (if there is any) to destroy you.
12. Cannibal Critic - target is no longer able to communicate in normal language. Of their cursed race the target can only howl bestial war cries of generic criticism. And hastily consume flesh. Successfully answering a question can cause the target to pause and grunt in reflection before screaming another random question.
    1. WHAT’S THE MESSAGE
    2. WHAT DOES IT MEAN
    3. IS IT IRONIC
    4. IS IT KITSCH
    5. DON’T YOU FIND IT PROBLEMATIC
13. Dragonborn - If the dmg. dealt is to a non-dragonborn creature then the creature takes dmg. from their innate breath weapon, held within glands of which no non-dragonborn is prepared. 6d6 acid and poison dmg as their insides boil with draconic bile.
14. Gargoyle - FUCK BIIIIIRRRRRRRRDSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
15. Duergar - roll a d2 to Enlarge/Reduce target. Acquire sensitivity to sunlight regardless.
16. Untermensch - the target’s muscles atrophy and their mind begins to falter as all of their ability scores reduce to 8. If one of their scores is less than 8 it does not rise to 8. Apply a -2 mod. to every dice rolled. The only thing of which they can be relied upon is to either fail or clumsily execute every task.
17. Drow - target adheres to a woman’s word almost unwillingly and acquires sensitivity to sunlight. Incessantly mutters consequence for someone under their breath for whom they despise.
18. Githzerai - target casts Plane Shift unwittingly on self.
19. Bedlam Bird - The target knows when it is being looked at. The target loses all alliances and registers as “Evil” to spells and senses that detect such. It is compelled to commit pranks that are utterly fucked.
20. Wizard - Your weapon moves through the air at your exact command. Gains Antimagic Susceptibility. Lasts 2 min.
21. Azer - The target’s head ignites, it’s skull a torchlight shining bright light in a 15ft radius and dim light for an additional 10ft. It cannot be put out with water. The target takes 1d8 per round for 3 rounds.
22. Banshee - the target casts Wail. All within 30 ft. (including target) Con sav 13 or drop to 0 HP. On a success 3d6 psychic dmg. After the Wail, the target goes mute as their vocal cords are stretched to leather and can only emit a poor whine if exhaustion.
23. Androsphinx - The target’s body explodes and from within erupts a Heroes’ Feast. The depleted carcass turning into a gorgeous royal table spread.
24. Basilisk - Bestowed upon the target is a basilisk’s Petrifying Gaze.
25. Revenant - The target will rise as a Revenant 48 hrs after it’s death for the one who killed it.
26. Cat - The target has to be killed 8 more times.
27. Eigengrau - The target loses all memories from the last 24 hours
28. Zoanthrop - Target strips naked. Immune to all mind altering effects.
29. Wizard Hunter - Do you cast spells? You’re FUCKED.
30. Wild Magic Sorcerer - Roll 3 times on the Wild Magic table. All within 60ft radius are affected by the wild magic emanating from the target
31. Unseen Servant - Target turns invisible. Acts upon every command you give to it flawlessly. Limited only by its ability scores (they don’t change). Loses ability to speak or think for itself. Will not be around whenever you wake up from your next period of sleep.
32. Nabassu - target acquires a soul stealing gaze, anyone to look at the target must make a DC 16 Cha saving throw or reduce its maximum hit points by 13 permanently
33. Giant Squid - the target, upon this successful attack and when panicked or fleeing, squirts copious amounts of ink from their eyes, nose and mouth. Mixed with blood because that’s not supposed to happen, 1d8 dmg. with each use
34. Werewolf - the target shreds their outer layer of skin revealing blood soaked fur underneath, taking the form of a werewolf and using a werewolf’s stats, with their skin they also shed any physical and mental conditions
35. Gazer - the target gains the Gazer’s ability to mimic any simple sounds of speech in any language, with the target’s weak eyes it casts Dazing Ray and Fear Ray on itself and collapses into a depressive slump on the floor, screaming in fear in the last voice it heard, unable to flee
36. Virgin - the target becomes the crucial object in the ritual of the nearest carnal, gluttonous, murderous or heretical cult for their petty god, monster or demon of chosen worship. What will their death summon?
37. Nupperibo - the target acquires an insatiable hunger consuming any organic material within reach and easy enough to chew if no living opponent is within 30 ft. If the target attacks or is attacked by a living mortal then it can track that opponent flawlessly as it hungers for its flesh. Greater meals or death will cause it to leave you alone
38. Phoenix - the target explodes and each creature within 60ft must make a DC20 dex save, taking 4d10 fire damage on a failed save, or half as much on a successful one. The explosion destroys the target's body and leaves behind an egg shaped cinder that weighs 5 pounds. The cinder is lukewarm seeing as the target isn’t an actual phoenix. It is not immune to anything seeing as the target isn’t an actual phoenix. After 1d6 days, it hatches into an infant of whatever race the target was.
39. Oblex - target becomes amorphous if it isn’t already. Unfamiliar with it’s new form the target slumps into a pile of ooze unable to move, eat or breathe.
40. Gauth - the target begins to float into the air uncontrollably. With fewer eyes than the Gauth the target is blessed with only Pushing Ray and Sleep Ray, both of which it casts on itself, as it floats snoring into the clouds
41. Bullywug - the target becomes so repulsive that nature itself will reward you for its demise. If or when the target is killed you are healed to your maximum and your Con. increases by 1. It will be difficult though, because the target can talk to frogs and loves lording their power over you and has absolutely no shame. They immediately give themselves a shitty title that means nothing and will love talking about how every swamp ever is theirs to rule. Oh and they fucking reek, if you get within 10ft you’ll vomit automatically and uncontrollably
42. Hivemind - the target’s spinal cord vibrates and emits pheromones to call any swarming creatures (rats, insects, birds, etc.) nearby into a frenzy causing them to fall into chaotic bloodlust and whomever the target chooses
43. Modron - the target loses all mercy and remorse and will fight for their current objective even putting their own lives at risk. The target becomes immune to mind-affecting, emotion-affecting, and magic that draws upon the Positive Energy or the Negative Energy plane. You could quell its pursuit if something with 4 sides or more was able to give orders for it to stop.
44. Obliviax - you must make a con. save (DC 12) or else the target eats your memory of the last 24hrs and heals for d20+4 health. If you fail, you also lose 1 spell slot if you have one to lose and forget 1 spell randomly, if you know any, each for 24 hours. If you save they still heal as all they have to eat are things that you know but forgot you knew, like that play you really liked that one time
45. Strandvaskaren - the target is infected with the soul of one who drowned at sea but the waters preserved him in the inch worm gap between life and death and they float neither alive nor dead. The target feels heavy, cold, lungs weak, aware but able to move. The pressure of uncharted waters sits heavy on their chest and their strength is reduced by half rounded down.
46. Impartial Anima - the target solely relies on a pair of wolf bone dice (or another pair of dice if those go missing) to tell them how to make decisions. 1-10 is a no or negative response. 11-20 is a yes or positive response.
47. Adventuring Party - the target grows a magnificent mustache as steel armor sprouts from their skin and their hands glow with arcane magicks. Their pockets grow fat with religious symbols as a toddler’s diaper would when it’s stomach is upset. Or when it’s angry. Or even flirty. You sense a celestial presence hover over them as they grip their newly found sword and bow they are obviously skilled at using. You thought you had a fair amount of gold to possibly bribe them with but you realize you walk with a lighter step and at their feet your valuable currency lies in a burlap sack
48. Seraphim - the target knows nothing but their own feelings and nothing worth nothing ever came out of a book. The only true things, now, are feelings. Anyone who attempts to attack it must save or hesitate in it’s presence. The environment around the target begins to convert into things beautiful and pure. Roll d4
49. All metal within 50ft turns to gold
50. The target bleeds from sacred stigmata and the blood turns to rose petals as it falls
51. Grows wings and if already winged they are instead, actually, held aloft by a flock of doves
52. They lose their clothing and double in size as their skin turns alabaster white and they wear only a ribbon
53. Animated Barrel - the target attempts to grapple the nearest opponent and once successful begins to throw itself against walls, down stairs and out windows; enjoying the process. The target takes half damage while the opponent grappled takes double.
54. Panther - the target speaks all languages and becomes evil (if not already), honorable and utterly merciless. Will chat up it’s victims or give them a head start before murdering them.
55. Djinn - the target is imprisoned in the nearest vessel and must do their best to fulfill 3 requests for the one who frees them. They are given no additional power to accomplish this.
56. Barnyard Chimera - the target's head bends backwards horrifically making room for it to grow the heads of a cow, pig and goat. It grows the tails of a goose that spews blinding shit. When killed it splits open, spilling out 3d6 featherless, bloody chickens with red eyes and sharp talons. It runs on malformed horse legs speaking but only repetitious mindless phrases. "How about that weather, huh?" "Well, let's finish up and then have supper." "Aw hell, she's coming out breech."
57. Psychopomp - the target will become a guide/beacon for one of the hostile souls devoured by The Imperator Scum resurrecting it and freeing it from the trident.
58. Bell Dragger - the target is imbued with the soul of a wronged martyr. Their eyes go sickly white and they walk on their hands and knees dragging them to bloody stumps. Solely focused on the path to the afterlife, they will forever crawl until they find it. But Bell Draggers are both the summoners and chariot horses for death’s arrival. She will arrive soon.
59. Watch Lark - the target blooms a random amount of additional eyes all across their face above the nose. They can see through thick foliage and thin walls and all attacks have disadvantage on them as they always see you coming. Disadvantage against being blinded.
60. Remorhaz - the target’s stomach bubbles a heated secretion that spills from their mouth. The heat from both their mouth and body is strong enough to melt any nonmagical metals. 2d20 dmg. for every turn spent within 5ft of them. The bile is useful to alchemists in making heat related magical items. The target also becomes highly resistant to magic.
61. Arolohnso, Petty God of Labyrinths - the target using 3 fingers on each hand encircles themself drawing angular, snaking lines in the soil around them. Creating an elaborate maze of which they are the end. The borders drawn become invisible, impenetrable walls that protect them from all things but protect the target of their wrath from nothing. To reach the target, and make them vulnerable, you must draw a line through their maze solving it.
62. White Lion - the target becomes a Queen/King of a fallen kingdom. No serfs nor servants to pretend to care for them. They’re safer now than they’ve ever been (at least from the dangers of someone else’s hands). Their name and legend and royal blood is all lost to a land that has no gods nor masters any longer. Roll for effect:
63. They take their life as all of their worth was found in their property. Either by claw, royal dagger or casting themselves off a cliff or into the ocean, etc.
64. Their crimes as Queen/King are unforgivable and heirs to the wronged will appear behind the target and murder them in cold blood
65. The conquering challenger to their name/bloodline appears and disembowels them splashing you with their old, freshly-poor blood. They are an unpersuadable antagonist and the target is a pathetic remnants of a now dead kingdom
66. You are the new Queen/King. To a country side, people and riches unknown. When you find your kingdom your blood will lead you to wine and fresh fruit. The throne will be warm for your arrival. The target feels their royal blood leave them and they become desperate to drink it fresh from your veins to maintain their deific right. Their hostility is doubled.
67. The Whisperer - Trees whisper. The noise is low, tectonic, incomprehensible. Dial tone static bleeding through the vines of the deepest holts and groves. Spirits dance and gather around antler crowned gods who rule the brazen forest. Soft sounds bloom to life. Elves who hear this music sing to it wringing melodies from the resonances of the treesong. The target collapses into a sobbing heap. They are being wrung dry (poetically) from the beauty of the woodsong. When you’ve obtained comprehension of such extravagant, egoless harmonies what petty life squabble is worth donating your energy towards? The target cares not for your childish conflict any longer. They are possessed by the inability to remember the words to such an old song. One they recognize but do not remember. You can’t help them. They are no ally but no enemy. Pain cures all curses of the mind, though. Do not fetter them with continuing aggression lest you help them lose their place. If so, their hostility will quadruple.
68. Brave Explorer - the target has a distaste for the beaten path. So much so that it is unable to repeat any action, starting from this effect, becoming more and more unpredictable over time.
69. Leper - the target’s flesh becomes warped and scaly becoming an offense to your gaze. You can barely look upon them without vomiting on yourself. Unwilling to project your bile in any direction less it crosses your gaze once more. The Target gains expertise on stealth checks both active and passive. DC 14 Con save to resist puking at the sight of them. Once you succeed a check, remain immune to their image for 24 hrs.
70. Antithetical Spirit - the target’s emotional attachment for the world and its inhabitants become reversed to their present disposition. Do they hate you? Now they love you. Do they want to kill you? Now they want to fuck you. Do they want to eliminate everything you love and make you watch? Now they will kill everything you love in tribute to your limitless beauty and knowledge. Careful how you treat people.
71. Chadwick - the target is just...un-fucking-bearable to listen to. When they say your name it feels dirty afterwards and you just want to wash your parent’s mouths after the fact. They go on about bird calls as if they don’t have to take a breath to keep going. The target becomes an energy vampire and drains you of any optimism you have for the day and all you want is for this goon to go back to their home to watch the paint dry and not inform you of the oxygen reacting to the resin causing polymerisation of the paint leading to it’s lack of sheen once it’s settled. The rage in you is that equal to a Berserker and you gain the Frenzy trait. But you also suffer the effects of the Slow spell until you save on a Wis DC 15 at the start of your turn or kill the target.
72. Johann Smiff - the target immediately becomes a stranger to you and anyone who can see them. Their face and identity are so familiar and on the tip of your tongue but sooner to become dismissed as deja vu then remembered. They know who they are. But they are a face in the crowd before anything else to you. The one you knew them to be still exists in your mind but it is certainly not the target. The effect will wear off after the next long rest.
73. Bay Dolphin - saltwater, freshwater, the target can breathe in either and requires one or the other to do so at all. The target remains highly intelligent, as dolphins are, and retains it’s motor skills and muscle memory. The target will rush to find itself a suitable environment to be able to breathe once more, as a blowhole begins to peer open upon their scalp, but will be able to do so without panic for several minutes. Once they get into the water their constitution and dexterity both become 20 and they are immune to fear.
74. Atticus Aurelius - the target is imbued with the soul of a famed gladiator from several eras passed. Skilled with any weapon as Atticus was, the target becomes proficient with all physical weapons (improvised or not). Able to command the applause of an audience at the drop of his helmet. If a crowd surrounds you (of any humanoid, undead/constructs or not) the target can command them to boo you and your allies causing you to suffer from the effects of Bane. Or they may cheer the target applying the effects of Bless. No saves. If the audience is unsatisfied at a poor showing or cheating habits their boos and riot will suppress you further applying the effects of Slow. Put on an absolute banger of a show with flourish and skill and their cheers will apply the effects of Haste. No saves.
75. Jäegerjog - the target’s soul becomes the one born to die at your hand. Sewn into the never ending tapestry of time it is their fate to perish by your influence alone. They know it though you may not. They also know everything about you and they have advantage against you in every aspect as you suffer disadvantage in every reflective aspect. They also can’t be killed by anyone but you.
76. Dracolich - the target becomes an unwilling phylactery of an ancient Dracolich. Watch the skies…
77. Rook - the target and all who can see them become one within The Parliament. Each individual is now on trial and must provide a story to be judged by their peers. As the anecdotes unfold more and more blackbirds will arrive and encircle the lot of you to listen in. At the DM’s discretion the one who told the least captivating tale will be pecked to death by the encircling birds, and attacked by any affected N/PC, for 15d10 dmg before they flutter off. No save can be made less you reveal yourself as an outsider and ally yourself with the guilty. (WIS DC 14 for the most rebellious of you). Any shiny trinkets you can throw within the circle will decrease the DC by 1.
78. Nymph - the target becomes a beacon of inequitable beauty. Their form becomes statuesque to each individual who gaze upon them. Their desire to fight dissipates and they become concerned only with judging others for their beauty. Weak in the knees to the target’s newly bestowed sex appeal, you unwillingly confess to them which part of yourself you hate the most. Confused by their Nymph aura, though they are none. Whoever they take pity on most reduces their CHA score by 1. The target then runs away, believing the mere presence of such filthy, struggling adventurers despoils their presence just by being near. The air of death and rot on you is more present than it’s ever been. You cannot help but stay on your knees as you watch them flee. You are free from their hold once they leave your sight.
79. Übermensch - the target can perform any action perfectly with mathematical efficiency. Consider every one of their ability scores and rolls a 20 without the proficiency modifier. The target lacks heart and chaos in their soul from this point forward. They can execute all required of them perfectly. There is no surprise in their execution. They will always perform at maximum potential except in the dealings of art. They can be taught, certainly, but without thorough guidance all of their CHA rolls equate to zero regardless of modifiers.
80. Star-Crossed Lover - a soul torn asunder, the target becomes one half of a harmonious pairing that will bring light and love into this world. A larger piece of the puzzle than you are at this moment. The union of the target and their mysterious lover are victims, but vital players, in a blood feud. Their death(s) will shift the tide in a grand conflict unseen...
81. Woodland Eidolon - the target's eyes become ovaled and protrude subtly from their head as a nervous fawn’s would. Their skin molts and grows fine ivory hairs as they shiver and freeze. Unblinking. Shallow sharp breaths. A spirit of the woods stands before you and you have the span of a blink to claim your kill or else they are lost to legends told around the campfire once more. Their DEX Skill becomes 20 and all DEX checks and saves are criticals made with advantage. They can outrun your magical influence and know when you’re going to act before you do. But….if the stars are aligned and you land the killing blow (any successful attack is a killing blow)...their trophy will bring you gifts of which you only dreamed
82. Antlers - netted in a spider’s web wet with morning dew, the glistening beads and weave act as a dream catcher for the most malicious nightmares protecting you from magical influence as you sleep
83. Pelt - it warms you as a campfire would and as long as you are blanketed by it you are immune to cold and your health regenerates for 4 for every round of combat it’s equipped
84. Horn - left lying in the dirt it is a sign of something terrible and conquering walking the grounds, an obelisk of bone that prevents predators and ambushes alike within a mile radius. But if you are caught carrying it you are seen as a dishonorable scavenger and your name will be besmirched within the wilds. The pheromones from it act as a subtle aphrodisiac amongst humanoids (not including undead/constructs) and you have prof. in CHA checks
85. Scrimshaw - an ivory tusk from a Mother Walvis decorated with a sailor’s tale of his time on the seas. The carvings are half finished leaving most of the tusk bare. All stories have an ending and this sailor’s is now yours to tell. This tusk will bring you a boat when you have none. All you must do is find shore. It will also allow you to hold your breath for up to an hour.
86. Broken Night - the target becomes bored by all they know well. Any extraordinary item they have on their person that they are well acquainted with will equal the value of trash immediately. If they know you well, then their pursuit of you, or risk thereof diminishes entirely. They will respond to threats accordingly but otherwise would prefer something strange and rare to busy themselves. Especially if it is of a teasing nature. If they hold something of interest to you then they are always willing to trade for a more interesting object. Or even a story perhaps.
87. Neogi - A Neogi can smother a weak mind with some ease. The target’s mind becomes weak. Prey for any who have the ambition to use it for their own bidding until the body collapses. The target becomes cowardice prey. If so inclined, you’re welcome to impose your will upon them. Though so can everyone else. The blank-canvas-welcome of their mindscape has too much potential to pass up. Greedy minds can sniff out the glove-fit of their embryonic potential like a shark for blood. Who says no to a soft body that asks for it?

Hey y’all! I have the worst attention span and I don’t think I’ve ever finished a serious writing project (besides small assignments and more poems than Emily Dickinson lmfaoo) in my entire life. Right now I have a book that I’ve gotten to 17k words (ab 40 pages). This is the first project that I’ve felt had actual potential and is actually really good. I’m proud of my writing and brain storming. I’m proud of my character development. I’m proud of how far I’ve gotten. I want to be able to keep working on this and make some good progress over the Summer but I’ve got the worst attention span and it’s so hard to get motivation to write even when I want to and have things to put down. The last time I finished a book was when I was a toddler and my mom wrote out what I wanted…I’m 20 now and it’s literally so pathetic that I can’t keep my focus. It’s disappointing too because I do have a natural talent for writing and when I finish small projects (like poems, I have a ridiculous amount lol), a good chunk are actually really good and I’m proud of my work. It’s just disappointing because I want so bad to keep my novel going but it’s so hard to write more than a couple paragraphs without genuinely tweaking and scrolling on my phone or doing something else. It’s embarrassing too cause I call myself a writer yet I can’t finish a freaking novel. Does anyone have any tips? Has anyone else had this issue and improved? Thanks y’all!!

"Brain Rules for Baby" by John Medina is a practical guide for parents, offering evidence-based insights into how to raise happy, healthy, and successful children. Drawing on the latest neuroscience research, Medina provides clear and actionable advice on topics such as language development, emotional intelligence, discipline, and education. He presents twelve "brain rules" specifically tailored to the needs of infants and toddlers, addressing common concerns and misconceptions about child-rearing along the way. With a blend of scientific evidence, real-life anecdotes, and practical tips, Medina empowers parents to make informed decisions and create nurturing environments that support their child's cognitive, emotional, and social development. Whether you're a first-time parent or experienced caregiver, "Brain Rules for Baby" offers valuable insights and strategies for fostering a strong parent-child bond and promoting lifelong success. Medina's engaging writing style and compassionate approach make this book an invaluable resource for anyone navigating the joys and challenges of raising a child.
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This post is being made in response to another. I wrote an explanation and short summary of an answer. Members were interested in having a discussion around the response so I'm posting a copy here to open the discussion.
Original Post Link: Why do they force us to abandon them if they hate abandonment
-.-.-
In order to understand them, you have to understand the true psychology of an infant.
Literally.
Nothing will make sense until you understand that they are frozen infants, not children, but infants. A part of their mind is frozen in an infant state. Because of early terror (trauma) this part of their emotional mind is entrenched in an unshakable denial (it's dissociated and guarded by psychological defenses and warped beliefs).
This trauma can be anything that leaves an infant in a state of terror, this includes infant neglect. Parents who let their infants "cry it out" are sustaining terror in the infant and are allowing the infant to structure their psychological defenses around disconnection.
This is why they grow on the outside, and even their left-oriented brain develops, but conscious communication in the right side of the brain is severely severed. This severed communication is why psychedelics like LSD (drugs that improve left-right hemisphere communication) can open their mind to empathy and allow them to partially understand their deep shame, wound, original terror of annihilation.

Infant Psychology

An infant thinks that it is everything. Because an infant thinks that it is everything, it is alone. If you are everything, there is no one else. All is you.
Mommy or daddy is you.
When the primary caregiver(s) neglect an infants needs, they send a signal to the infant that they have no control over their environment. As in absolutely none. Imagine being a vegetable who cannot control their environment no matter what you think or attempt to do. The terror would be unbearable... so what does an infant do? They freeze, close off attempts for connection (because desiring it is painful), and they wait for death. They accept it. But they only accept it consciously, where the pain is felt. The trauma still dwells in the subconscious.
Why is this so horrible to an infant? If we back up a little, mommy and daddy know that the infant won't die. And as adults, we know the infant won't die, but many people are completely apathetic to the fact that the infant believes that it will die. They have NO experiences to prove the contrary.
All of this is non-verbal. Remember that. Infants don't talk. They feel and communicate with their nervous system. They also get feedback about their environment through their caregiver via mirroring... Sound familiar?
If mommy or daddy show that the word is safe, then it's safe. If mommy or daddy show that the world is bad, then it is bad. If something happens and mommy or daddy smiles, it's okay. If they scream, it is bad.
But remember... an infant IS the world. So if mommy or daddy believes that the world is bad, or neglects an infant to the point that they think they are not safe, then THEY believe that THEY are bad. The infant believes that it is bad and the entire world is bad by default. They have no other frame of reference.
Infants are SUPPOSED TO BE DEPENDENT. There is absolutely NO way to teach an infant "independence". The reality is that an infant CANNOT do anything for themselves besides ask for help. And our infant biology KNOWS this.
Parents who try to make their infants or babies independent somehow are truly stupid people. As we develop, we naturally want interdependence and then independence in adulthood. There is no need to force this process in a child. They want to get away at some point anyway, and when that happens it's also the parent's responsibility to give them the independence that is rightfully theirs.

Defenses & Positive Emotions

Okay, so infant gives up on making connections... but there is something kind of wrong. They didn't die, and they still unconsciously want/need connection.
Let's assume that the infant tried to make bids for attention with pleasing behavior in the past but it never got them what they needed. What happens? They give up doing or feeling positive things.
Positivity itself becomes a trauma trigger. This is why narcissists hate seeing happy, vulnerable, mushy people.
Positive feelings that might develop in childhood, like love, admiration, and care turn into their negative version: hate, jealousy, sadism. Why? Because they CAN'T process positivity. Its too frightening. So they redirect the energy into the negative version in order to express the emotional energy.
This is rewired emotional processing is called alexythymia.
As they reach adulthood, they know what they're doing. They just have such deeply ingrained and delusional beliefs that they can't care. They have little to no control over or awareness of their emotions and are COMPLETELY driven by them at the same time.

Negative Connection

If we circle back to mommy or daddy and infanthood, let's say bad behavior gets some attention... ah, there we go. Some semblance of connection. This negative "connection" is enough to satisfy the baby's unconscious mind. Also this "connection" is perfect because it doesn't directly elicit positive emotions or require intimacy or vulnerability (signals that were severed because they weren't ussful)... NO BAD SIGNALS BUBBLE UP TO THEIR AWARENESS AS A RESPONSE.
It feels good to them unconsciously. Really let that sink in. At some point in their non-vebal infancy, bad feelings toward their attachment figures and negative reactions were a way that they could feel good.
These mechanisms and defenses quietly develop. They learn that they have to hide their urges and behaviors in order to "survive". The infant is still in denial and is in some way in control because beliefs and rewired signals were built around traumas that cannot be verbalized (infants don't talk, toddlers barely do). And remember, their awareness is limited to the left hemisphere of their brain where words are processed. If the infant doesn't speak, then that frozen trauma state cannot communicate with the left hemisphere. The left hemi is where most of their conscious awareness is.
Because of all this they don't know how to interpret the emotional signals (flashbacks) from the past even when they do receive them.

Narcissistic Collapse

When shame does reach them... they f@cking overload and experience a narcissistic collapse. Why? Because they have NO PRACTICE processing shame or accountability. None. They have no positive defenses that allow them to block enough shame to reach acceptance without feeling that SAME infant terror of annihilation that they faced long ago. Their collapse is a walk through the terror of death. They have never walked their darkest valley like other people have (faced their conscience). And when they go in, they have no way the stop themselves from being consumed by things that may be true or not true. Everything feels true and dark. They are exposed to both the truth and the faulty judgment of a dark conscience.

Why Do They Force Abandonment???

So why? Maybe it makes sense by now. I hope that I'm explaining well enough.
They can't handle connection.
They aren't trying to force you to abandon them, they need you to stay despite their bad behavior in order to feel safe.
Because that's where the nonverbal infant is still trapped.
They cannot truly soothe themselves. They look to you (mommy, daddy) to tell them that they are not bad afterall, but because they are frozen in a nonverbal traumatized state in the past, they cannot process the positive affirmations. All is bad. Even you. Because all is them.
But they still need to know that others will continue to take care of them... just like mommy or daddy.
These defenses WORKED. They are alive. The result is that they live in a survival bias bubble. As an infant, someone fed them and kept them out of harms way despite their connection defenses... someone was always there even though they had negative feelings toward the caregiver. That survival... it's reinforcement.
We know that other things work better... things like empathy... but they don't know that.
Their frozen infant doesn't have a frame of reference.
They are caught between unconscious defenses that prioritize disconnection and a deeper unconscious need for connection. When they torture others, it's the closest thing to "connection" that they can feel. They feel safe there. They feel safe when they torture you and you stay. You are mommy or daddy. Literally. You are the original attachment figure to them. Their defenses WILL NOT allow them to see you any other way.
This is why, in their minds, you deserve it. They wear a pair of internal warped glasses that are frozen in the past. The glasses make everything look like they are behaving "normal" but if they took them off, they would see what their unconscious mind sees. They would see their infant wounds being acted out over and over again with the same original attachment figures.
They are delusional.
I don't say that to insult. It's just what it is. They don't see things for what they are, and when they do, they have more delusional defenses to make sure they don't feel it.

Summary

They are frozen infants who learned that negative emotions and sadism are the best survival strategies and are trapped in a survival bias delusion as a result. They show these negative emotions because it's all they know (its how they process positivity & connection). Staying despite their bad behavior validates that they are in control. They don't want you to leave, but their defenses are convinced that you will eventually, so they make you their focus in life (use you as a stablizer), punish and destablize you for being a threat (connection trigger), and are validated by your ongoing presence despite punishment. The worse they behave, the more validation they get.

I was twelve years old when my body gasped,
and told me pleasure was the only real magic that ever existed;
as if all the early fairy dust
were just spores hanging in the wind.
It happened the same way the flowers bloom—
the way they perk up in ecstasy and then wilt,
and I wondered if there was ever really anything behind the curtain
other than the moaning garden and the hungry dirt.
 
I hardly noticed, when I stopped believing
At thirteen, my face swarmed with oil-gland stars
I’d pop them open, one by one, just to see what they would say
but then they’d weep like infants in their deaths,
leaving black hole pockmarked graves.
 
At thirty, I thought maybe I’d go on to have my own children
who’d hang off me like fruit,
while I shielded them from the jaws of the cosmos with false comforts,
telling them that the earth is not hungry and that they are eternal
until one day they’d watch my inevitable descent
into the voracious darkness that lives six feet under.
 
And there I would rest, at my lushest and ripest hour,
serving flesh to the earth,
yielding fairy dust to the flowers,
and holding hands with the same star-cloaked alchemist
that I stopped believing in when I was twelve.
——
Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed! This is a revised version of a poem I wrote last year. I hope mods don’t mind the repost. Cheers
1 2

Please don't tell me that it gets better or that I have people to talk to. It will not, has not, and I do not. I'm not going into any detail because my reasons are my own, but I'm 22 and I've been wanting to die since I was 13. It's gotten worse and worse as the years have passed. Even if I did have people to talk to, I wouldn't. I don't want help, help won't let me forget anything, not trauma that started as an infant to fucking everything else in my goddamn cursed fucking existence.
I tried to drown myself in '23 and I wish wholeheartedly I had put more effort into it after coming up from the water by accident the first time.
I've tried talking to people I was in contact with because I was in pain and desperate for help and have gotten flat out ignored. That was before it got this bad again. I don't want to talk anymore. If anyone wanted to help they could have sooner, and now they won't be able to, and I'm taking my own control back.
Please don't go on a tangent in the comments about how it won't work or other assumptions like I've seen here. I've done decently extensive research over the past months on death by water restriction specifically. Thirst is present and towards the very end of the dying process, resides. It also has been reported in hospice patients who've "committed" legal suicide by this process were in little or no pain, and due to eventual delirium can produce a sense of euphoria.
Out of desperation for control of any kind without resorting to self harm or suicide I've gone periods without food, and even some without water, just to see how it would affect the scale. It was 24hrs, it was easy, and I am going to see it through this time.
Death in sleep is also present when terminal dehydration occurs, and that's how I dream of going. There is nothing in the entire world, nothing that is actually realistic to me and my circumstances, that would make me feel more at peace than my organs all giving out and passing away without waking up again, without having to think or feel alone or consumed by a rage I can feel in my entire being & at my core.
Someone might comment on the tone if there's input, and this post is aggressive because severe mental illness isn't pretty. It's destroyed me. Everything I have been put through from childhood to now (homelessness as a toddler, an abusive threatening alcoholic father, bullying every day, emotional abuse from other family) has sealed it. I used to cry over it so much just remembering it and how it's fucked up everything and now I just swallow it back because I want to do something about it.
I guess I'm posting this to vent. I just want to go to sleep and not wake up. All that's left to do is wait.

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did i have a lucid dream? my dream started out normal, i was playing with my daughter and suddenly there were 3 of her doing the same things she was doing (as if i was seeing triple) and when i seen 3 of her something clicked and i was like oh yeah im just dreaming, after that thought my 2 year old(s?) tried to murder me??? it was really scary and i was trying to wake myself up and thought i did, when i thought i woke up i latched my infant, checked my phone, and was scrolling through different apps before starting my “day” and then something very small would happen and i would know i was dreaming, and as soon as i knew i was dreaming something scary/creepy would happen. i finally thought i had actually woke up and went outside to talk to my SIL and asked her if she wanted to take our kids to the park, she said yes but we’d have to take my car so she had my keys around her neck on my lanyard to drive my car. my keys are to a 2015 chevy, so it’s a fob but has the button to push to pop out the actual key. we got the kids in the car and we’re about to leave and i seen 3 of my 2 year old running down the road so i looked at her and said “hang on we have to wait for me to wake up before we can go in seeing 3 of H(toddler)” and she got this very creepy smile on her face and popped the key out and stabbed me repetitivly in the neck, when i actually woke up i was gasping and grabbing my neck, the last thing i remember saying was “i need to wake up i need to wake up” and “wake up wake up wake up”. i was fully aware i was dreaming as soon as i seen something even slightly off, the cycle of me “waking up” happened at least 10 times. i couldn’t seem to control anything but i did know i was dreaming and that i needed to wake up. weird experience.

TLDR; my little girl has never slept well and we've learned low ferritin might be the culprit. she's very picky with food, hates meat. other parents of sensory seeking, picky eaters: how do you support your kids diet? will i ever sleep again?
long story: we bed shared until 1.5 for sanity and one parent usually ends up in her bed for part of the night. pretty much from 2 months old until 2 years, she woke hourly sometimes even less.
early on we had some latch issues and ped wondered if that could be disrupting sleep. i had her checked for oral ties, IBCLC & ENT said none. we started baby led weaning around 7 months, and she was a fabulous eater but still a shitty sleeper. worked with a sleep consultant and tried adjusting schedule among other techniques. no dice. she introduced us to the idea of low ferritin and suggested blood work, but we were traumatized from an infant blood draw and put it off.
we noticed around 2 that she was displaying some sensory distress and suddenly refused most solid foods so we had her evaluated with early intervention. did not qualify there, but started with occupational therapy and that has helped with feeding some over the past few months. and gradually, we started to see success overnight with just brief wakes and longer stretches of sleep.
i just weaned at 2.5 years, right at our 1000th day. almost immediately her already crappy sleep went to hell. i can't even call these split nights because she's up from 1 am until at least 5, sometimes all the way until noon. we finally caved and took our sensitive flower to get blood drawn. sure enough, her ferritin is at a 7 and toddlers are usually in the 20-50 range! wish we did it sooner but alas.
we've started the iron supplement and it's like wrestling an alligator to get it down. this girl also loves milk and yogurt which is her main source of calories. i know that's not great for iron absorption so i'm coming to the good people of the internet for ideas. what can i prepare and offer this sweet summer soul who only wants white bread, chocolate, and plain yogurt? how can i enrich her diet with iron when she hates greens and meats? i want her to be well nourished and well rested and it feels like the odds are not in my favor.

Last week a relative's infant came to live with us, theoretically until his dad finishes his upcoming jail sentence but realistically will likely be much longer.
We have a toddler and the adjustment has been a little rough. She went very suddenly from the only and the favorite, to having to share mom and dad and granny. The new baby is a very small 4 months so he takes a lot of our time and obviously she doesn't understand.
Are there good picture books for little kids to help them understand why there is all of a sudden a new child in the house?

Our son (19mo) just switched from the infant room to the toddler room at daycare, same facility.
The transition has been rough on him emotionally as expected, but the worst has been the daycare itself.
It started off with zero communication, the toddler room supervisor told us weeks in advance about the transition, and they started doing partial days there to help intro him. Great. But on the first full day my wife dropped him off and the supervisor in that room was/seemed clueless about it. Didn’t know where we should put his stuff, didn’t know where his diaper supply was, etc.
We picked him up that day and he was a wreck from crying most of the day. The infant room has taught him some sign language, one of which is milk/drink and he was doing it constantly at pick up. When we got him home he chugged 12oz, then another 8oz before bed. My wife noticed his daycare cup was bone dry. So he had gone 9.5 HOURS with nothing to drink. I had a conversation with them the next day and they said it’s because he has a sippy cup and they don’t use them in the toddler room - this was one of the things not communicated to us, and sippy cup or not it’s not a reason to not provide fluids! I connected with the supervisor of our old room who said she would check in and make sure he’s provided his sippy cup. Old, infant, room by the way was great.
The last three days we’ve picked him up with old crap in his diaper. Like it’s a caked in his diaper and everywhere it’s on his skin his beat red. He has the worst diaper rash on his bum and scrotum that he’s ever had. It’s raw and starting to blister, we can’t get him to sit in bath water. He winces and screams when we put cream on it. Today my wife picked him up and poo was literally down his leg. She marched back in and demanded to change his diaper, they gave her a size 6 (he’s a size 4) and when my wife questioned in the supervisor said they put on what we gave them…
My wife had a frank conversation with them today and is rightfully upset.
The supervisor of this room is literally like talking to a tree stump. She still wears a Covid mask on her chin but I think it’s to catch her drool.
This daycare center is a chain of 3 others and we will be drafting an email to the manager tomorrow once my wife has admittedly cooled down.
Waitlists for daycares in Ontario is literally 18-24 months long so we can’t just pull him out and go elsewhere. Our only option is they get it together or possibly they can switch us to the second toddler room, but we doubt it since they have to maintain staff:child ratios.
Negligence is harsh word but I’m having trouble seeing this as anything else

I work a pretty high stress job, frequently working 12-hour days and my husband works equally long hours. So after I went back to work after mat leave, we had to rely on my in-laws for child care as no daycares were open long enough hours and I also felt too guilty about my long hours. I've worked to get my hours down and move to 9-hour days this summer and finally to part-time (25-30h/week) in the fall. My LO loves her grandparents and I'm grateful to them, but it has not come without its problems. As they are oldenot in great health, they had to rely on various baby containers, namely a baby walker, in order to keep up with her which resulted in some minor gross motor delays/delayed milestones that my peds sent her to physical therapy for. They also leave her plonked in front of the TV all day so now I'm worried her speech will also be delayed. They don't feed her the food I cook for her, telling me she doesn't like it, and prefer to feed her pretty unhealthy snack foods. As I am receiving free child care and recognize the sacrifice they have made in caring for her, I have had to bite my tongue despite not being happy with these things. I have tried some gentle correction which was always met with 'she's fine'. They also give me a hard time for co sleeping and don't like me BFing her. They did tell us that the child care was temporary until I was in a position to cut my work hours and they wish to move back to their retirement home in FL. We have been trying to get her in to a daycare for a few months without luck as the waitlists are very long for the good ones in our area. We then thought we might try an au pair but we have been trying to find someone for the last 2 months and no luck so far. We cannot afford a nanny long-term. In addition we are moving house this summer as our rental is being sold.
My options for child care are: temporary nanny until we can find an au pair, the down side of which is that she will have a lot of upheaval this year OR her grand parents are willing to stay on for another month or 2 until we find an au paidaycare spot. The disadvantage to this is that she is not getting the right stimulation that she needs as a toddler.
My personal preference is a temporary nanny so I have a bit more control over how I want her raised including her food eats/screen time etc and who might hopefully do some more stimulating activities with her. But I'm worried this is a lot of upheaval/stress for a toddler to move house and change childcare from grandparents to nanny to later au pair in the space of a few months.
What do people think, her grand parents are very happy to stay on a little longer and I know at least psychologically she is not stressed with them and from that perspective is well cared for.
Edit: thank you so much to everyone for the responses! I definitely feel better about searching for a nanny for the summer until we get something more permanent. I bit my tongue about the TV while she was an infant but that now she's almost a toddler, I know getting rid of screen time will be harder if I let it go on. As for the junk food, it's not chips, french fries and candy they let her eat, it's things like Ritz crackers and baby puffs instead of real whole foods. I am very health conscious so most processed food is junk food to me.
And to those telling me to quit my job, believe me I would LOVE to but I was in my final year of medical training. I did ask my PD about a year off and was punished for my request (which was obviously denied) with extra call weekends and presentations so I just kept my head down after that. I had always thought I'd work in a big academic hospital but being a mother has completely changed me and so I sought out a low paying part time position and intend to only work part time until my LO and any future siblings are in highschool. That's the best I could manage as my husband doesn't have great earning potential and we also still want to do things like purchase a house etc. I've made the best compromises with my career that I could manage.

I’m having a baby late July and will be staying home with him. I am thinking about taking on another infant to watch while I am home with him to earn extra income or possibly an extra infant and toddler. No more than that and in my city, state less than three kids does not require a license. So my question is should I do an LLC for tax reasons or just file the C for self employment?? I want to do as many tax deductions as possible I.e. home office, insurance, grocery store runs, baby supplies if the infant uses my baby stuff, etc. if that helps. Should I have an LLC or not? Would I save more on taxes with an LLC??? How should I do this? Thank you

I’m having a baby late July and will be staying home with him. I am thinking about taking on another infant to watch while I am home with him to earn extra income or possibly an extra infant and toddler. No more than that and in my city, state less than three kids does not require a license. So my question is should I do an LLC for tax reasons or just file the C for self employment?? I want to do as many tax deductions as possible I.e. home office, insurance, grocery store runs, baby supplies if the infant uses my baby stuff, etc. if that helps. Should I have an LLC or not? Would I save more on taxes with an LLC??? How should I do this? Thank you

I’m having a baby late July and will be staying home with him. I am thinking about taking on another infant to watch while I am home with him to earn extra income or possibly an extra infant and toddler. No more than that and in my city, state less than three kids does not require a license. So my question is should I do an LLC for tax reasons or just file the C for self employment?? I want to do as many tax deductions as possible I.e. home office, insurance, grocery store runs, baby supplies if the infant uses my baby stuff, etc. if that helps. Should I have an LLC or not? Would I save more on taxes with an LLC??? How should I do this? Thank you

Hello! I am currently a household manager for a family of four but I do a small amount of childcare too (about 6 hours a week) for a 4 y/o and 8 y/o. Before this job I was a full time infant/toddler nanny for ten years. I burnt out, so I moved to this side of childcare. However, I am now burning out again. Are there any former Nannies on here that have transitioned to household management with little to no childcare that have any advice on where to find domestic jobs that are not solely childcare based? I know this doesn’t fully fit on this sub but there is no fitting sub for this question.

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Congenital eye disorders are conditions present at birth that affect a child's vision and eye health. These disorders can range from mild visual impairments to severe anomalies that require immediate medical intervention. Early detection and treatment are crucial to ensure optimal visual development and overall quality of life.
Common Congenital Eye Disorders

1. Congenital Cataracts: Clouding of the eye’s lens that can lead to vision impairment or blindness if untreated.
   
2. Congenital Glaucoma: Increased intraocular pressure that damages the optic nerve, potentially leading to vision loss.
   
3. Retinopathy of Prematurity (ROP): Abnormal blood vessel development in the retina, primarily affecting premature infants.
   
4. Strabismus: Misalignment of the eyes, commonly known as squint, where the eyes do not look in the same direction.
   
5. Anophthalmia/Microphthalmia: Absence of one or both eyes (anophthalmia) or abnormally small eyes (microphthalmia), leading to severe visual impairment.
   

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Any advice on tantrums? Honestly I don’t know what’s going on with my daughter. I want to take her to the pediatrician because I’m really concerned about her behavior. Her dad and I coparent so she’s with him a few days out of the week and then comes back home with me. He and I both live with family. I spend as much time as I can with my daughter and I make sure she has every thing she needs. However we are having an issue with behavior and it seems to me that she only does it with me. When I tell her no it’s always an argument and it’s always a fight. It can be the silliest thing like when she takes baths and she wants the water higher I tell her no, and she will beg and beg and beg even when I try to take her mind off of it she’s begging and whining. If she wants juice I tell her no and she screams and cries and begs. She’s very demanding and very spoiled and I don’t know how to nip it in the bud. Today she had a full blown meltdown and screamed to the top of her lungs and was nearly hyperventaling because I told her she needed to take off her princess dress and she threw an absolute fit. I can’t really let her cry for too long or let it get too bad because I stay with my grandparents for right now and my grandfather is too old and he gets too agitated to listen to that. I’m just concerned about what I’m doing wrong that she acts like this with me and not her father or other adults that watch her in our family. Her school even tells me that she listens really well. I also want to add (and maybe this is far fetched) that I’ve noticed she’s been really sensitive to loud sounds like bath water running, or a plane passing, the hand dryer in public restrooms, the vacuum.. list goes on. She’ll cover her ears and kind of get a little annoyed and do a little cry/yell like a mini panic. She’s always had trouble sleeping since she was an infant and toddler, majority with multiple wakings through the night. And the next point may have nothing to do with anything and I remember when I was younger I was terrified of spiders and had a hyper fixation on them, now I’m noticing my daughter has a very irrational fear of spiders and even the smallest of flies she will freak out. Other than the behaviors of wanting her way and being demanding and the sleeping thing she’s very intelligent very bright and excelling in school and has hit all her milestones on time growing up. Is this just a case of tantrums or could something deeper be going on?