Emom made a new email (to get past the one I blocked) to send me an email saying how much she misses me, and exact quote "From the bottom of my soul I am deeply sorry for anything we did to you. I was a selfish mom and once real life came for me I should have put you guys first no matter how I felt about anything."
When I met my fiancee, I wanted nothing more than to have her meet my family and be part of it. She met my grandparents (who I am still in contact with), but not my parents because I went NC shortly after everything.
If she genuinely was sorry and cared, she'd leave my ndad, right? She wouldnt give a politician vague apology of "anything we did", right?
Im trying to fucking keep it together and keep strong and idk what to fucking do. I dont think I ever can forgive or face my father again and I certainly cant with my mother if she continues to be with him.
I really need help.

Okay so this happened a couple months ago around mid-March. I posted what happened in another subreddit, but a couple of people mentioned posting it in this one too. I keep rehashing it over and over and yeah… here is what I said in the original post:
I can’t deal with my mom anymore. My whole life I was always afraid to talk back or stick up for myself. And then when I do, she just continues to berate me. Here is the story…
I don’t know what to make of this situation. It would be a long story if I tried to explain it all so I will attempt to make it brief. So, a couple weeks ago my mom started talking down to me.
My memere has been dying. And my mom told me my “priorities are skewered” and “it’s quite underwhelming, honestly” “your memere is the opposite of good health.” She said this because I told my mom that I would visit memere later in the week.
Keep on my mind my mom kept going back and forth on this matter. She would tell me I should go and see my memere. Then a day later she would say I shouldn’t because my memere isn’t herself. Then she would tell me I should call my memere. Then she would tell me I shouldn’t because of how my memere isn’t in her right mind.
So, my mother spoke down to me by lecturing me about how my priorities were skewered and whatnot really pissed me off. I replied, telling her not to talk down to me and telling her how rude and condescending her comments are. That just prompted her to tell me to not scold and tell me I all i do is think about myself and sleep all the time. She followed that with, "There, I said it." Like she's so proud and happy to get that off of her chest.
Keep in mind that I never discuss myself with my mother. But, she does know I'm in college. So how the heck does she know what I do behind my closed door? I could be studying, reading, listening to music etc. But no, she just slaps me with the "all you do is sleep and think about yourself."
Every conversation we have is either about my memere as of lately, or my mother will discuss things going on in her life.
And any other time I’ll just take it and deal with it (my mother being rude or whatnot) But this time I didn’t. It resulted in me eventually deleting the app we converse on. I told her to leave me alone and that I didn’t want anything to do with her. I knew it wasn’t worth going back and forth, and I didn’t want to say anything I would regret.
I ended up reaching out to her a week later saying “sorry memere is in hospice.” Since then we have been getting along.
Fast forward to today, I was searching for something in our conversation when I stumbled across her messages to me (from before I blocked her). I hadn’t read some of them yet because I didn’t want to. But then I saw she called me a “selfish, self-absorbed twat.” And that, “it takes a special kind of someone. Remember that.”
Keep in mind I don’t call her names. I decided to confront her about it. It didn’t turn out well. She just threw in my face about how she is going through a rough time because of her mother and also threw into my face how she has been here for me at my lowest points and that I put her and my dad through hell (I assume she is referencing my alcoholism, which I have been sober from for almost 2 years). She also said “and I stand behind the selfish twat comment.”
So I ended up saying, “and you’re a bitch.” Which prompted her to saying how I’m a despicable woman and that she would never talk to her mom like that.
I just don’t understand how she thinks it’s okay for her to call me names, but when I dish it right back to her she continues to try and bring me down, or throws in my face how she was there for me at my lowest points. It makes it seem like she is trying to guilt trip by bringing that up (from when I was suffering from alcoholism which caused my parents to be worried for me and stuff).
I understand her mother is dying. But does that really give her the okay to treat me this way? I blocked her. And I honestly do wish I had kept my cool. I did initially the first time around when I removed her. But this second time around I let the situation get the best of me.
Okay so now for an update…sadly my memere ended up passing away :’( Ever since then, things haven’t felt right between my mother and I. After that whole debacle, she texted me a couple weeks after telling me that she loves me and also said, “I apologize for my choice of words. I reacted and I reacted badly.” All I said back was “I love you too.”
I felt like her apology was crummy. It seems like she isn’t even really taking responsibility for her actions but almost placing the blame on me. Acting like I’m the one who caused her to lash out.
Since then, we haven’t talked much. Honestly I just feel uncomfortable regarding the whole situation. It’s hard to move past it. I don’t know if I’m overreacting by still being affected by it. A week ago my dad texted me letting me know to not forget about my mom for mother’s day…which I had already planned to visit her.
So, on Sunday I went to go see her and gave her flowers because it felt like the right thing to do. But every time I think of her and when I saw her, I just keep replaying all of what happened. I just don’t know what to do anymore. As I said, I don’t know if I’m just overreacting and if I should just try and get over it and forget about it.

Huge content warning: The cat was a baby, and didn’t die naturally or kindly. Traumatised pre teens, teens, and adults mentioned. There is no good side. It’s horrible. I doubt anyone wants to read this, I’m mostly just needing to scream into the void
My mom is on here so if you see this hi mom. I hope I got the facts right.
I honestly just don’t know who to even vent to about this. The majority of my family was witness, minus my father who was at work, and understandably nobody really wants to talk to each other about it yet, and I’m not very good at emotion in general so.
I (17F) came home from school to this horror show. Bit of background. We got a new kitten we found abandoned at our church, who we named Weasley. She’s a small ginger kitten who we think was unable to hear. She was the most adorable thing I ever saw and even though we only had her 2 weeks, she had the whole family completely in love.
So tbh I was half asleep when the bus dropped me off so I didn’t process it fully in the moment. I came home to my sister who we will call Luna (12f) crying like I’d never heard before and considering she’s fairly emotional that’s saying something. One of my dogs, one that had a reputation for being an ass, was locked up and considering the kitten was Luna’s and she was so upset I could hear it from the living room, I got a bad feeling.
I went to Luna and sat on the bed and held her awkwardly (I’m on the spectrum and for me crying people are a bit nerve wracking. However it’s Luna so emotional constipation be damned) until she explained and it was so much worse than I assumed. I thought the cat got a bit roughed up and my mom (45F) was MIA because she took her to the vet. Nope.
Apparently grandma was taking laundry to the room where the cat is kept (Luna’s room) and my dogs got in. 3/4 were uninvolved, the other however is responsible for the particularly violent death of my few month old kitten, which my sister witnessed but was no match for a big dog, and my grandmother froze in fear.
My mother managed to get the dog away after some time which nobody can agree on how long.
My mother, too shocked to realise how bad the damage was just kinda held the cat for a bit, until my little sister pointed out while crying that the poor thing was obviously dead because its insides were outside a bit
Mom stuck Luna with grandma and took the kitten and put her in a box, which will be buried and given a proper funeral soon. I’m working on a makeshift gravestone.
That’s when I got home and was caught up after holding Luna for a while. I ended up calling my best friend because I didn’t know how to console Luna. So my best friend came to help with the emotional turmoil
I think today was the first time i heard my mother cry and be so utterly sad. It was awful but oddly bittersweet because I knew she felt the same as me and Luna do. Knowing my mom understands is always very comforting.
Thanks for letting me vent, Reddit.

Visiting my grandma is so draining!!!
Hello! I am female, 25. My grandma is 77 and lives in a retirement home.
Backstory: I spent most of my childhood days with my grandma. I really loved her and still do. My mom was always working so my grandma took care of me. She is really goofy and sweet and nice.
She has been sick as long as I can remember. Different things like renal insufficiency, arthritis, can’t walk, immense pain in her legs,..
My mom always complained that visiting her was so draining and she hated it because my grandma always told her about her pain 10 times and then she complained about everything else. When I was a kid, she never talked to me about it so I always thought like 'why does mom say such mean things grandma is so nice'
My mom has died 2 years ago. My grandma had to move to a retirement home because her health deteriorated quickly. She almost died but somehow made it through. I was always by her side because I am the only one left in the family. I visited her multiple times a week when she was in the hospital. She was always full of drugs and she couldn’t hear a thing so I always wrote on paper and she answered.
When she moved to where she is now, I tried to visit once a week. I’m pretty busy because of work. I also adopted my moms dog and always have a lot to do. Now that I am the only person my grandma can talk to, other than the people in her home that 'behave like they are 150 years old', she always complains to me about her pain and everything else she is mad about like doctors, men she sees on tv, war, kids behaving badly, other people complaining(yes, really),…
Usually, I enter her room, sit down and then she talks for like 2-3 hours straight without letting me talk. I try but then give up after some time and just listen. When she talks about her pain, she always says it in like 10 different ways, 10 different times. Again and again. I know that she is suffering especially since my mom died and I get that she needs to talk about her pain but I can’t hear it anymore! It is chronic pain so it never changes and I KNOW that she has it. She doesn’t need to tell me again and again. Also, since my mom died it seems like she has beginning stages of dementia. So everything she tells me, she tells me several times.
I love visiting her when we talk about positive things or new changes in my life or a nice movie she has seen. But that almost never happens. It’s like she loads her negativity onto me and I take it back home when I leave.
It’s hard to explain but after listening to her complain for an hour, my body starts to feel as if I am going to pass out. It gets stressful to listen and I feel like I can’t sit straight anymore I get dizzy and get a headache. I am extremely sensitive and empathic, so listening to someone talk about negative things or them suffering is always stressful for me. But with her it’s so bad that my body reacts to it.
This has lead to me not visiting once a week but once every 2-3 weeks. I feel SO bad about it!!! I feel guilty and ashamed. I know I am the only one who visits her and I know how much she loves me and loves seeing me but I just can’t.
Today is week 3 of not visiting her and I know I should visit her today and I’m fighting with myself.
I don’t know what to do. Talking to her about it is not an option. She is extremely sensitive so it would be very hurtful to her. She would take it as me not wanting to hear it and then she would never talk about her feelings again and just stay silent the entire visit.
I try to lead the conversation in different directions but she always ends up complaining again. Most of the time I leave after 1-2 hours because I feel like she sucked out all my energy.
TL;DR Has anyone else experienced something like this? Why is it so hard to listen to someone complain? What can I do to not feel so drained? What’s an appropriate amount of visiting someone in a retirement home?

WIBTAH to use the coma of my ex’s father in the custody battle
Hi! This story will require quite a bit of context (that can be found here https://www.reddit.com/AmItheAsshole/s/2Vo9S0QKF1). I need to both vent and find some advice, so any input is appreciated. Long story short, my (F26) ex Fitz (M 32) keeps finding reasons to sue me to get full custody of our son Tim (M5). He sued several times in the past, but now everything went too far.
After a previous fierce custody battle we had an iron tight co parenting agreement. It took ages to reach one as he kept trying to include clauses just to make my life miserable. Right after graduating, when Tim was around 1 yo, in the middle of our custody battle, I would take Tim to work with me a lot. I would have long hours at the beginning, trying to make a name for myself, while Fitz was trying to paint me as a negligent mother for leaving Tim with a nanny while studying, back during finals. Hence, every other day after 4:30, when most people would go home, my mom would drop Tim at my lab and he would stay and play next to me in my office until 8 when we would go home. I would offer him plenty of attention as I would mostly run time consuming simulations that would require little involvement from my side.
Knowing this, Fitz fought tooth and nail to stop me from doing this, knowing how much easier this made our life. I work in a lab that focuses on various incurable diseases research. I almost never get in touch with the biological side as I am in the modelling team, doing mostly maths and coding. My office is in a different building than the lab and Tim has only ever been in my own office, far from the biological material. However, in the end, after arguing that my workplace is dangerous, Fitz managed to get a clause that would prevent me from having Tim with me at work. In order not to have it sound personal, the clause stated that Tim was not to be taken in any place with a BR factor greater than 1, unless his safety would be at play.
Where we are from, the BR factor of an establishment measures the risk of getting an infectious disease. Any biological lab has it greater than 1, by default, even if they do not work with any viruses . During the pandemic, all hospitals got their BR increased over 1.
Now, after an emergency, Fitz sued me for breaching our agreement. He has had a private detective in me for the better part of the past two years and kept trying building a case against me for “repeatedly violating our contract “. He kept using petty situations, like Tim being alone with my dad for 2 minutes into the men’s room at the mall while my mom and I are right in front of the door, waiting for them, even though my dad is not on the pre approved list as he has epilepsy. Or me not having an epi pen at my home because I gave it to Fitz as his was about to expire and it was his turn to pick up Tim who has severe allergies, even though our agreement said to have one at all times. (Just to make it clear, I bought a new one before getting Tim back). He also tried to paint me as a danger for having had seen a psychiatrist in highschool and early college. The reason was an eating disorder, nothing that could be any danger, which Fitz was aware of.
Even though all his so said proofs and breaches of contract were silly, with the most serious one described in the linked post, the trial got very intense, with him attacking me on a personal level. While we live in a big city, it quickly became the biggest gossip in our community, being on the lips of all the moms from pre school, most of them siding with me. Unfortunately, as much as I tried and couldn’t keep it all from Tim, since he was asked lots of questions by the kids at pre-school who heard about the situation. He became very stressed and started having night terrors.
I tried to reason with Fitz for Tim’s sake with no luck. 2 days ago, Fitz’s sister, Mia, came to see me. She wanted to give me something that could end all the stress Tim was under.
Almost 3 years ago, Fitz’s dad had a heart attack and almost died, but made a miraculous recovery. While he was in a coma, Fitz and Mia took Tim to the hospital to see his grandfather for what was thought to be the last time. Fitz’s entire family agreed there was no point in telling me, since I was very empathetic about the entire situation and even suggested that Tim and I could go visit him in the hospital once I picked him up from Fitz. They refused, however, since Tim already visited him, but did not mention this to me. She gave me texts to prove everything she was saying, and showing that Fitz knowingly breached our agreement and hid this from me for years on purpose.
My lawyer says that since this event occurred before all the ones he tries to use against me, it could get the entire case dismissed immediately, since it would have voided the parenting agreement we had. He guarantees me a win nonetheless, it would just take longer if we don’t use this. My parents think I should be the bigger person and not use it, as it is cruel and I should be an example for Tim for when he will be older. They insist that I would be in the wrong, especially since I would win nonetheless. I, however, just want to end this nightmare for good, and take care of the emotional health of my son.
I don’t know what I should do or how I should protect Tim at this point as I believe he should have a father and he and Fitz are really close, but at the same time, Fitz does hurt Tim a lot these days.

both me and my sister are currently college students who are back at home for a few weeks until we can move into our respective summer places. i dread having to be around her at all. she can be fine over the phone but in person it’s a completely different story.
when we were children she was diagnosed with a severe life threatening illness and was pretty close to dying. she spent a long time in the hospital undergoing various treatments before being able to come home. i know this isn’t her fault, but as she’s gotten older it’s become clear that she has a sense of entitlement from it. because she was my parents youngest child and incredibly sick, she got (and now gets) anything she wanted (she got my dad to buy her her own car, she gets new phones and technology whenever she asks, her hair and nails and tanning all done whenever she wants, i could go on but i’ll stop there) she calls herself “the princess” of our family.
what drives me crazy is that she seems to think my stuff is her own. i have more than siblings than just her and understand that siblings take each other’s stuff all the time, but what i get upset about is the fact that my sister has no limits. if she likes it, it’s hers even if it was made for and gifted to me. i don’t know if she just likes seeing me get upset or if she actually just wants things she has no use for. i think she likes to see me sad.
all of this is fine — whatever, yk. i always just told myself that i’ll move out and won’t have to deal with her. but this week that changed.
i’m a lesbian and in a relationship with this really awesome girl who i just adore (who, btw, cannot stand my sister). my sister is a religious christian and has never been directly homophobic to my face, but she does like to make jokes (especially if they include telling everyone she can very loudly about how much of a lesbian i am or if it means she can say lgbtq+ slurs 🙄) this week though, she decided that using a slur directly to my face would be funny. haha.
she refuses to talk to me most of the time, so i went to my mom and told her that she needed to talk to my sister. i can handle a lot but i feel as though i’m being pushed to my limit. my parents have apologized to me multiple times for my sister’s behavior over the years and told me they speak with her about everything but they nor my sister ever seem to change (even when i can’t get through the conversation without crying over how frustrated i am).
now, i have decided to stop trying to be nice to my sister. every time she decides to scream at me, tell me how awful i am, make her dumb jokes, anything she usually does, she will not be met with her nice big sister anymore. i am done sitting here silently and taking it. unfortunately, my choice of words towards my sister has made my family quite angry with me — they tell me i am overreacting and that i just need to deal with her. we’ll both be out of our parent’s house soon. AIO?

Hi! This story will require quite a bit of context (that can be found here https://www.reddit.com/AmItheAsshole/s/2Vo9S0QKF1). Long story short, my (F26) ex Fitz (M 32) keeps finding reasons to sue me to get full custody of our son Tim (M5). He sued several times in the past, but now everything went too far.
After a previous fierce custody battle we had an iron tight co parenting agreement. It took ages to reach one as he kept trying to include clauses just to make my life miserable. Right after graduating, when Tim was around 1 yo, in the middle of our custody battle, I would take Tim to work with me a lot. I would have long hours at the beginning, trying to make a name for myself, while Fitz was trying to paint me as a negligent mother for leaving Tim with a nanny while studying, back during finals. Hence, every other day after 4:30, when most people would go home, my mom would drop Tim at my lab and he would stay and play next to me in my office until 8 when we would go home. I would offer him plenty of attention as I would mostly run time consuming simulations that would require little involvement from my side.
Knowing this, Fitz fought tooth and nail to stop me from doing this, knowing how much easier this made our life. I work in a lab that focuses on various incurable diseases research. I almost never get in touch with the biological side as I am in the modelling team, doing mostly maths and coding. My office is in a different building than the lab and Tim has only ever been in my own office, far from the biological material. However, in the end, after arguing that my workplace is dangerous, Fitz managed to get a clause that would prevent me from having Tim with me at work. In order not to have it sound personal, the clause stated that Tim was not to be taken in any place with a BR factor greater than 1, unless his safety would be at play.
Where we are from, the BR factor of an establishment measures the risk of getting an infectious disease. Any biological lab has it greater than 1, by default, even if they do not work with any viruses . During the pandemic, all hospitals got their BR increased over 1.
Now, after an emergency, Fitz sued me for breaching our agreement. He has had a private detective in me for the better part of the past two years and kept trying building a case against me for “repeatedly violating our contract “. He kept using petty situations, like Tim being alone with my dad for 2 minutes into the men’s room at the mall while my mom and I are right in front of the door, waiting for them, even though my dad is not on the pre approved list as he has epilepsy. Or me not having an epi pen at my home because I gave it to Fitz as his was about to expire and it was his turn to pick up Tim who has severe allergies, even though our agreement said to have one at all times. (Just to make it clear, I bought a new one before getting Tim back). He also tried to paint me as a danger for having had seen a psychiatrist in highschool and early college. The reason was an eating disorder, nothing that could be any danger, which Fitz was aware of.
Even though all his so said proofs and breaches of contract were silly, with the most serious one described in the linked post, the trial got very intense, with him attacking me on a personal level. While we live in a big city, it quickly became the biggest gossip in our community, being on the lips of all the moms from pre school, most of them siding with me. Unfortunately, as much as I tried and couldn’t keep it all from Tim, since he was asked lots of questions by the kids at pre-school who heard about the situation. He became very stressed and started having night terrors.
I tried to reason with Fitz for Tim’s sake with no luck. 2 days ago, Fitz’s sister, Mia, came to see me. She wanted to give me something that could end all the stress Tim was under.
Almost 3 years ago, Fitz’s dad had a heart attack and almost died, but made a miraculous recovery. While he was in a coma, Fitz and Mia took Tim to the hospital to see his grandfather for what was thought to be the last time. Fitz’s entire family agreed there was no point in telling me, since I was very empathetic about the entire situation and even suggested that Tim and I could go visit him in the hospital once I picked him up from Fitz. They refused, however, since Tim already visited him, but did not mention this to me. She gave me texts to prove everything she was saying, and showing that Fitz knowingly breached our agreement and hid this from me for years on purpose.
My lawyer says that since this event occurred before all the ones he tries to use against me, it could get the entire case dismissed immediately, since it would have voided the parenting agreement we had. He guarantees me a win nonetheless, it would just take longer if we don’t use this. My parents think I should be the bigger person and not use it, as it is cruel and I should be an example for Tim for when he will be older. They insist that I would be in the wrong, especially since I would win nonetheless. I, however, just want to end this nightmare for good, and take care of the emotional health of my son.
What should I do? Any advice on the matter will be highly appreciated!

I feel like I’m going to explode if I don’t vent. I’ve been seeing myself get progressively more angry where anything will set me off or make me go into a rage or cry. Before my depression was just me in bed but I’m feeling too many emotions now. Especially anxiety and anger. I really really want to die so bad but I could never bring myself to try after all my failed attempts it’s just another slap in the face. But I can’t feel this anger and build up anymore I think I’m going to lose my mind.
There’s too much pressure on me I don’t think I will ever be able to live up too. Especially with my mom. Everyday she tells me how badly she wants me to start her a business or something so that we can get rich and it puts so much pressure on me because that’s not my dream I’d never be able to start something I don’t even know anything about that. But everything is on my shoulders she tells me she’s tired of working and she can’t do it anymore like I want her to work. I’m only 25 km still in school I haven’t even started my life yet but the burden of her life is now on my shoulders. I feel like a horrible person because she’s the best and of course I wish I was rich to help her but I don’t think that will ever happen.
The business is one thing but the lack of freedom to be who I am is another thing. My mom is very religious and I live with her, I’m not religious I have tattoos and a boyfriend, but she doesn’t know any of that. I have to cover up everytime I leave the house I can’t bring my boyfriend over I always have to lie. And I want to move out but she threatens to jump off the balcony or says she’ll kill me if I leave (exaggerated) but it’s too much guilt I carry I think it will kill me. It’s too much for me to handle now I feel trapped like I won’t ever be able to have a life. I feel selfish and guilty that’s why I want to die I’ll never be able to live up or be of help to anyone I’m useless

(Long post)
I created this reddit account to let this off my chest and I want to know if I'm okay.
I was born and raised for the first 6 years of my life with my parents, but me and my brothers moved to another country and my dad said that he will catch up to us and travel soon to live with us "soon"
Soon turned into 19 years... He never came to us, we kept on video-calling him, he kept sending us money (to me and my brothers and mother) my parents aren't separated, still married, but and I quote: "I have a business here, I cannot just leave everything and come to you"
He didn't have a secret life or anything we know him, we are Muslim and so was he, we don't do such stuff, he didn't cheat on my mom and he was working up to his eyeballs.
I loved him and we all loved him, my mother didn't love him as much because he preferred business over his family where he stayed in one country and we stayed in another...
He died due to heart related problems, doctors told him to do something and he did other things so it's like he wanted to die and he did, it was his own choice to ignore what the doctors advised him to do..
After he died I felt sad and heartbroken, but I did not shed a single tear, the only thing I was worried about is: who will send us money? I'm a student and I don't have a job...
A year later my family dog died, he was 15 years old and we grew up together... The messed up part is... I cried for 7 days, I would be in the shower, bed, standing, sitting.. I'd just punch the wall or my bed and just cry in anger because I couldn't do anything and I loved my dog, he was like my little brother...
I tried to show emotions, I tried to mourn him I tried and overthinking made me go nuts I don't know what is wrong with me... Why did the death of my pet best friend made me ooze up tears and the death of my father didn't hit me like it did with my pet? Am I sick? I was sad yes, but didn't I feel as devastated or depressed when I saw my dad's dead body on a video call, and whenever I thought of him..
I just wanted to let this off my chest and I want to talk to someone but I don't have anyone to talk to.. Thanks for reading

I know a lot of people could frankly give less of a damn of what I have to say but I just don’t can’t anymore it’s been 12 years since I’ve gotten anything off my chest, and I’m about to crack for the longest time I’ve been called a failure by everyone in my family including my 2 siblings my grandparents ect. My mother was very suicidal growing up and had been hospitalized 4 or 5 times while my father spent most nights at the strip clubs a, Few years pass and my grandfather dies of skin cancer and my mom visits the state he lives at to take care of him. Meanwhile in my hometown my father is cheating on my mom by another woman who I visited occasionally with him. And he thought nothing of it shortly after my mom found out and divorced my father and took my brother and sister away from me and. I never saw them for 5 years my sister got addicted to cocaine and my brother tried to off himself every day. And I became a mess because of it drank myself to death did everything I could to just go away because I thought I was just a burden to my family. My grandmother even blamed me for the divorce and engraved it in my skull calling me the devil I ruined it not them. And so I cracked I never would harm myself ever and I just went off and cut myself 57 times and went to a hospital for 4 days and after that heard nothing from my family it’s been 8 years and my family still doesn’t talk to me.

I went over to my dad's to help mow his lawn and clean up his yard because he's no longer capable, when I came across two kittens. We had destroyed their home unintentionally while throwing away some of the trash, so I hoped their mama would come back and move them. Well, she didn't, and a dog came and tried to eat them (the front yard does not have a gate). Luckily the dog didn't because we got to them in time. Having moved them, we waited to make sure mama would come. I started thinking how they were feral and I had seen the mom who was also feral. The kittens were about 2-4 weeks old and the mom only looked like a year old herself. So I decided to try to trap her and take her in to get her and her babies adopted out.
She finally showed up late at night and we caught her, but while trying to get her into her cage she bit me, clean through some work gloves and my fingernail, several times. I had no idea their fangs could do that. Well, we got her packed up and this morning I took them to the local no-kill shelter. They let me know that when she is old enough and the kittens are weaned that they would fix her, tip her ears, and re-release her if they aren't able to find a home for her. I'm glad I did it, but my hands got mangled. I can guarantee that those kittens would have died, so at least now there won't be new kittens dying each year.
The highlight of my day was my son getting to hold a kitten for the first time in his life. He is deathly allergic to all animals with fur so much so that he requires an epi-pen, and he started allergy shots only a year ago. He is still very allergic, but the allergist encouraged me to give him antihistamines and then let him pet a cat to test what his reaction would be. He got a little itchy, but was overall fine. This is pretty incredible! We will do 3 more tests before I will feel comfortable enough to start taking him to stores again (because everyone brings their pets into stores, not just service animals, but everyone). Next test will be a full grown cat that has never been around dogs. The third test will be a puppy or dog that has never been around cats. Last test will be both at the same time. If he doesn't have serious reactions to any of these tests it means we can change the way we live. We can go to parks again, and he can go trick or treating for the first time. We will be able to ride on airplanes again, and go on hikes in the woods.
The allergist informed me that he would add even more cat and dog allergen into the shots this year so hopefully we could speed up the process. My son has been carrying around a little stuffed dog he named Oreo for the last 2 years in anticipation of the day he can have his own pet. He takes such good care of it. When it's cold outside, he even puts it under his coat to keep it warm.
I am not an optimist, but I have great hopes for this coming year!

I (35f) have found evidence that my mother who has been missing 20 years is still alive and is out and about. I have 4 siblings, Jane 37, Ann 33, Fran, 33, and Crystal 30. We were all raised together, even though some of us our half siblings. Jane and I are full siblings. I never really separated any of us because we all share the same my mom and were raised together so I just call every sister; sister. When I was 12 years old, my mother asked me a question “if you had to choose with being with me or your sisters, who would you rather be with?”. I remember telling my mom I would rather be with her, then a month later, she woke me up in the middle of the night and told me we were leaving. A bit a background, we were extremely poor, living in shelters or government assistance. There were many times we went to bed hungry, but sometime my mom would wake me up and take “us” (me and her) to get food. My mom was my everything from a very young age. Anything she believed in, thought or taught me, I retained over the years and found them to be important. Like “join the military, if you don’t know what you want to do” “treat every relationship like it will be you last (i.e. do everything to take care of your man). I did 4 years in the army, and every relationship, I put way more into than I should’ve. But in my eyes, these were things I was supposed to retained and respect. When I hit 13.5 years old, everything changed. In 2002, the state, government, DCS, CPS, DCFS, whatever it is in your state found me. They found me at school and took me away to live with my sisters and Grandfather (someone I was always told was dead). I finally saw my sisters again, I was happy about that. But it also came with its own set of problems. “Where have you been? What happened? Why did you?”, Ect, etc. Of course, I had no answers, the choice to pick my mom or them, I couldn’t say how it all went down in the beginning, keep in mind I was 12 to 14 in this whole process. After a while my sisters and I were able to get passed that decision I made. We ended up having “visitation” with my mother. She came to two visits, promised we would see her again and then disappeared. She reached out one other time after the 2nd visitation to tell ME, she was in the hospital for trying to kill herself, literally my last conversation with her. This happened in 2002/03, it all blurs this point in 2024. So they found out me with my sisters and grandfather (someone I remember my mother saying was dead already when I was with her). So my mother raised me until I was 13, and my grandfather took care of me from 14 to 24. Over the years, I would always try to look for her, I would used reverse address sites, stuff like “BeenVerified” “Truthfinder” and other reversed address websites. Anything I could afford to find her, never had enough money for a private investigator. But thought all the websites I never found substantial information. And I did this at least once every other year for about 14 years. It was devastating nothing ever panning out, but life goes on. May 2016, her father my grandfather passed away. He left $100,000, to each of his children. At the time I definitely thought, this is when I’ll see her again, this is when I’ll know what happened, because of course she will show up to get her inheritance…. Wrong… so wrong, she never popped up and just continued to be gone. Our original state is California. In Cali, if someone is missing for 5 years you can you can have the courts declare them deceased, it’s paperwork and exhausting, but also totally doable. I waited 8 years to start the process of trying to get the inheritance (it was never about the money, but in my mind, if it’s just there with the State, forget all that, give it to her struggling kids). So in January 2024 I started the process so me and all my sisters can get the inheritance. I was preparing documentation for the next court date and stumbled across a copy of my mother’s ID and birth certificate. I found it through the court because she was trying to get her inheritance exactly at the 5 year mark. I feel awkward. I prayed and hope for a long time that I would see her again, but after 20 years, I figured she must have died, People don’t just leave 5 children behind and forget about them…. Now that I was trying to better the lives of me and my sisters, now I find her information…. (It’s all too weird) I know life isn’t fair, and people have it better and worse than me. But I’m also like, what type of bullshit is this, I was finally ready to move on, now’s there’s a small glimmer of hope that I’ll see her again… you have got to be shitting me… I found her info a 2 days before Mother’s Day, just another slap in the face. So all that is the background to the AITA post. So now after explaining to 3 of my sisters that “she” found and I have an address for her, this is where the disconnect starts. Jane and Ann, wants nothing to do with her, they’re hurt, she left us, I get it, atleast to a certain extent. There’s so much hate because she disappeared. But myself and Fran, wants any and all information to understand what happened. It’s not normal to go AWOL so we want to know wtf happened. Unfortunately Crystal died in 2022, but she has explained her feelings before and she would definitely be on Jane and Ann side. Once again, I get it, we were all abandoned for over 20 years. I’m just a person that needs/ wants closure. And Fran is with me on that. Jane and Ann don’t want me to “poke the bear” there are completely over the situation, so when I mentioned reaching out, they both want absolutely nothing to do with it. And Jane doesn’t want me to reach out at all. But in my mind, I’ve been searching for years, so I want some contact if possible. So earlier today, I wrote a letter and sent that along of a copy of my youngest sister obituary to beg, super beg for my mom to respond me to try to have a relationship with her against my sisters wishes. I asked Jane and Ann for permission to send the letter, and the answer was pretty much “don’t do it”. I usually try to be super mindful of other peoples feelings and what they have been through ( I’m a Social Worker). But I felt like I couldn’t deny my feelings and I had to reach out. I’d be lying if I said I hated her, or didn’t want a real relationship with her. Over the years I started to say the same things as Jane and Ann, but I know part of that is believing I would never have the chance to see her again. But as of right now, that’s no longer the case. So AITA for reaching out to my estranged mother against my Sisters wishes?

Hey to anyone reading this. For the past month I have not been able to convince myself that life is worth living and am leaning towards killing myself. I have always been a positive person, have always tried my best to be kind to every person I interact with, and have always given as much love as I can to the people in my life. But I am just so fucking tired. I grew up with a schizophrenic, narcissistic mom, got bullied most of my life, and have generally been treated like complete shit by everyone in my life, but especially the people who are supposed to love you the most.
I have been in 3 truly terrible, traumatizing relationships back, to back to back. I married an immigrant when I was 23, and joined the military to get her citizenship even though it is something I never wanted to do. She broke up with me 12 hours before basic training. I took her back when I finished, only for her to leave me again after I got her citizenship 2 weeks before my first deployment, and only 4 hours after I stopped my father from killing himself.
Now I am with a girl who has broken up with me multiple times for no reason other than she is "indecisive", and has told me some of the worst things I can think of, including that she was going to go fuck her Ex boyfriend when she was in a fight with her mom. I was literally just listening to her and being supportive when she told me that. That was three weeks ago and it really feels like that was the last straw, the one that broke the camels back. I can't seem to bounce back from it, like I normally do. She is pregnant, otherwise I would have broken up with her because of it. I feel so fucking worthless. At this point I know I will never be loved. I have been shown that by everyone in my life since I can ever remember. And it is so heartbreaking because that is all I have ever wanted. I don't care about material possession's, or financial success because I have it and it is meaningless to me. I see so many other people that treat their partners like shit, hit them, cheat on them, and are still loved more than I ever have been or ever will be. What the fuck is the point of all this? So I can suffer for the next 50 years and die leading into nothingness? All anyone can tell me is that I "need to love myself" but why the fuck would I do that when nobody else is willing or able to? That saying is completely meaningless and is just an easy thing to throw out by people who have been loved in their life. I really wish I would have died on my deployments because my family would have gotten a million dollars from my life insurance policy, and I genuinely think that is worth so much more than me being alive.

I was raised by a father who was bipolar type 2, had borderline personality disorder, severe depression with constant suicidal ideation, the most severe anger issues I have ever seen in a human being in my life (imagine if logan roy from succession got hooked on amphetamines, about like that), and he committed suicide when I was 19. I was not allowed to feel in my home, if I was upset about anything at all, then that meant that I was "whining" and needed to shut up and be more grateful, even when I was "whining" that he took so many pills that he forgot me having to stop his suicide attempt, and I got angry when I mention that event and he went "what are you talking about?", I thought he was gaslighting me at first, but I later realized the combo of drugs he was on and his own severe mental instability had actually blocked that memory out from his stupid fucking head, but I was wrong for getting upset because "it's not my fault I don't remember". Not even the point, the point is I was raised that expressing emotions of any kind was a direct affront to my father that would not be taken lightly by him, and I VERY MUCH internalized that. It took me 18 months after his death to be able to shed a single tear about the situation, and even then it was tears of anger, and I had to force myself to cry, it was like my head was a hot air balloon of a whole lifetime of emotions and pain I had locked away and wanted to let it out but I couldn't, then when I did let it out, it hurt so much, that I wanted to numb it all away again, and that's when the drinking got really bad. I am 9 months sober after almost dying from anemia caused by a severe long term gastric bleed caused by my drinking (they consider the life threatening range for your hemoglobin level anything below about 7-8, yea, mine was 3.4 when i got to the hospital, it took 7 bags of blood just to bring me up to barely stable), and it left me with some liver scaring, I was so desperate to not feel all the pain that I drowned it, and now I'm finally having to come up for air, and oh boy. I feel like I have no idea who I am. Where does the me that my parents molded me into end and the me that is my true self begin. Will I ever be able to enjoy my interests without the deep seeded shame I have for stuff like watching anime that I have from my dad quite literally calling me a pussy for liking anime. I got a hunter x hunter charm necklace thing and I've been wearing it and I like it, but I still am so incredibly self conscious about it because of the time I tried to wear a necklace in like 5th grade and my dad said it made me look "faggy", which is absolutely fucking insane because my dad was genuinely not homophobic, my aunt was gay and she was frankly the only one of his siblings he actually liked, he didn't have a bigoted bone in his body, but what he meant is "girls won't go for you if you wear that", but fuck you, I was in 5th grade and (very much due to the emotional repression) I wouldn't get truly interested in dating until, let me check, NOW. I had a long term girlfriend through high school and college who was my first love, but we only started dating because she asked me out, I have never made the first move on a girl a single time in my life, I've quite literally never flirted. My whole life, I have been so scared of relationships because the only one I saw was my parents godless nightmare of a marriage where they were "staying together for me" even when I was in high school ACTIVELY ASKING THEM TO GET DIVORCED, because they were such fucking nightmares. I have always thought that whatever good feelings of love and fulfillment I would get from a relationship would never outweigh the pain that would come along with the fights, and only now that I'm finally starting to break through the layers of repressed emotions and that I've dried out off of the booze am I finally starting to feel different. The thing that is so hard is, I've just pushed all my feelings and all my pain down so deep for my entire life, that now the emotions are all coming at once, and good God I just can't handle it sometimes. I also got diagnosed as bipolar type 2 today, just like dear old dad, still sending gifts up from hell, just in time for my birthday too. The pain, the feeling that I have missed out on so much of my life by being to afraid of getting hurt to allow myself to have anything good. I feel like I've missed out on so much of life because of that bastard, and now I'm 25, I barely recognize myself when I look in the mirror, and I am trying to basically rebuild myself from the ground up after I almost died and got sober, and I am basically by myself dealing with it (very long story, but basically because of his death, our family business went under and my mom and I had to move to her hometown, in with my aunt and uncle, and I have no friends here and I am not close with my family and they are a bunch of judgmental Bible thumpers who basically think I'm a degenerate for drinking and a snowflake for my mental health issues), and I just feel so deeply intensely alone. I was so numbed for my entire life, that I didn't even actually know you could feel emotions this intense, the way that the sorrow just feels like a bottomless hole in your chest, and all I want is to feel like someone cares about me and that I matter. My mom is here with me, and she is doing her best, but if you can't tell from the post, she isn't exactly blameless in the cause of the issue, so that is kind of a double edged sword. I try and keep in touch with my friends from my hometown, but they're busy with their lives and they don't always have the time, plus I always feel like I'm putting them out when I need their help (there's that trauma again). I'm in therapy and I just went up to twice a week, but that still only helps so much. I even want to start dating again, but I'm stuck in a small town in the middle of nowhere in south Alabama, where the dating pool isn't exactly huge, and gets widdled down a LOT more when you take into account that I'm an agnostic democrat. God, every day I ask myself, why isn't he still here, so I can let out all of this pent up emotion and pain onto the person who actually deserves it, but even then I know it wouldn't make me feel better. So as I'm finally starting to be able to even have emotions again, I'm reminded why I wanted to numb them all away. I just feel alone, and like I don't even know who I am, and that who I am might not be the person I wanted to be, and there's a healthy dose of self hatred mixed in, and all I want is for someone to hold me and tell me it will be OK, because I know it will, but God damn it why does it just have to be so damn hard sometimes. Why did he have to die without me ever getting to tell him how he hurt me to his face. How could he rob me of that. He got to die with the last thing I said to him being that I loved him, and I have to take to my grave that the last thing that I ever said to my father was a lie.
Edit: TLDR: Abusive dad caused me to be so emotionally repressed that when he died I became an alcoholic to numb the pain and now that I'm sober and chipping away at the emotional repression, I feel an entire lifetimes worth of emotions hitting me all at once and it is incredibly overwhelming and has left me feeling like I don't know who I am and that I am all alone just picking up the scraps of my life, while not even knowing what the life I'm picking up even looks like. I just wish he was still alive so I could tell him all the things I didn't get a chance too while he was alive. All the awful, hurtful, painful, gut wrenching things I would say to him.

At 11:18pm I 18 F received a call from my friends also 18 F contact. I picked up and said hello. The thing that replied was either the lord himself or a gay man who smokes 50 packs a day. No hate to you lord, love u. But it said “i heard someone had a birthday coming up soon” and when i tell you my heart dropped to my bumhole and sent me into cardiac arrest. that was NOT my friend and i lowkey dont want to know what got its hands on our contacts. But. my finger flew to that hang up button and i sat there for a good 15 mins sweating bullets hoping I make it to 19 im too young yo die bro. I text my friend saying. me- “ NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE i wanna live to see my 16th im too young for this what do you want from me” her- “y u call me ARE TOU OKAY OMG RU SAFE??“
She says she was asleep when her contact called me, and also had no idea what was going on. I thought she was trolling me until she told me she saw a missed call from MY contact at 11:17 pm. Meaning whatever used her number to call me, also used my number to call her BEFORE calling me. Only difference is I picked up. my phone app says “incoming call 11:18pm her says “missed call 11:17pm”
We are currently on a facetime call and she is reading the bible as I am trying to convince my mom to let me put a salt cross somewhere in the house. Yes we have both considered christening ourselves and drinking only holy water for the next week. Our only ideas are 1-God himself is calling to warn us about the rapture 2-Sat*n tryna say sum??😭😭😭(NONONONO PLEASE NONONON) 3-One of our male friends (either the narcissistic addict friend or the extreme catholic friend) is prank calling us because our birthdays are soon (mine is in 15 days hers is in two months) 4-A alternate universe phone line somehow contacted the wrong galaxy and called us to wish us happy birthday or something or the other.
My friend says she may know something related to it but doesn’t want to say it right now bc of superstition and i dont blame her bc im tryna make it through the tonight. Shes going to tell me after school tomorrow. The only other thing for now she told me was that the guy friend she always calls started speaking in some aggressive asian sounding language with his mom randomly as she was on call with him. he then hung up. my friend asked why he hung up, but he said he never hung up, only fell asleep. Thats all for now. I’ll update in the morning if anything else happens. Has anything similar happened to anyone else? Or anyone know what do to. Prayers? Preists? Popes? Pastors? Physics? Mediums? Satanists? Christians? Catholics? Pranksters? Phone line people? Normal people? Niggas? Please bro (im black) Thanks.

I feel alone and sad most times. I don’t think anybody really cares about me. My parents (poor people who c chose to have kids) used to drag me on the floor, told me that nobody loves me and told me I’m going to be kicked out of the house for just existing since middle school. I was never a bad kid, I was really quiet at home. My birthdays weren’t celebrated unless I asked my mom to buy me a cake or ask her if I can have money. They let my older sister hit me, call me slurs, harass me.
Nobody believes me, I tell teachers (I wanted them to call cps), drop things here and there, but get immediately shut down. Some of them tell me that I need to remember to take care of them and buy them a house when I’m older, but most of the time, they just ignore me. They probably think it’s a hassle to be involved in student’s life. I don’t feel like I have anybody to talk about this with. I don’t feel like I have any adult that could help me or care to really listen without risking anything.
It was just recently that my parents found out I was a national finalist, going to a top college on a full ride that they stopped calling me dumber than my older sister who went to community. They started showing up to my award ceremonies, and constantly reminding me that when I’m older I’m going to buy them a house, take them out everywhere, etc when they do simple task like giving me money or taking me to school. I kind of liked it, but I got annoyed whenI felt like I was being used by them.
At my honour ceremony, I wasn’t valedictorian (they get medals) but I graduated with highest achievements. My parents were upset at me, asking me why I wasn’t this or that. My mom Called me ugly afterwards, I didn’t know what to say after that. I’m only treated correctly when they mention how much I owe them in the future, or when another parent is impressed by me.
I feel guilty not giving back. They are immigrants who don't speak english or have a sense of how to fill out documents or anything normal people can do, always dependent on others. I think they have a learning disability.
I achieved everything I wanted by myself in secret to prove them wrong, and I got what I asked for. For my parents to like me and brag about me more than my sister. But I really just wanted to be loved & appreciated in a “normal family.”
I want to disappear out of this world, no funeral, forgotten from everybody’s memory. I want to die every night when I come home from school, I feel miserable for working so hard . I don't have friends who understand, and I am guilty of ghosting my parents who will be homeless if I don't help them.

I feel alone and sad most times. I don’t think anybody really cares about me. My parents (poor people who c chose to have kids) used to drag me on the floor, told me that nobody loves me and told me I’m going to be kicked out of the house for just existing since middle school. I was never a bad kid, I was really quiet at home. My birthdays weren’t celebrated unless I asked my mom to buy me a cake or ask her if I can have money. They let my older sister hit me, call me slurs, harass me.
Nobody believes me, I tell teachers (I wanted them to call cps), drop things here and there, but get immediately shut down. Some of them tell me that I need to remember to take care of them and buy them a house when I’m older, but most of the time, they just ignore me. They probably think it’s a hassle to be involved in student’s life. I don’t feel like I have anybody to talk about this with. I don’t feel like I have any adult that could help me or care to really listen without risking anything.
It was just recently that my parents found out I was a national finalist, going to a top college on a full ride that they stopped calling me dumber than my older sister who went to community. They started showing up to my award ceremonies, and constantly reminding me that when I’m older I’m going to buy them a house, take them out everywhere, etc when they do simple task like giving me money or taking me to school. I kind of liked it, but I got annoyed whenI felt like I was being used by them.
At my honour ceremony, I wasn’t valedictorian (they get medals) but I graduated with highest achievements. My parents were upset at me, asking me why I wasn’t this or that. My mom Called me ugly afterwards, I didn’t know what to say after that. I’m only treated correctly when they mention how much I owe them in the future, or when another parent is impressed by me.
I feel guilty not giving back. They are immigrants who don't speak english or have a sense of how to fill out documents or anything normal people can do, always dependent on others. I think they have a learning disability.
I achieved everything I wanted by myself in secret to prove them wrong, and I got what I asked for. For my parents to like me and brag about me more than my sister. But I really just wanted to be loved & appreciated in a “normal family.”
I want to disappear out of this world, no funeral, forgotten from everybody’s memory. I want to die every night when I come home from school, I feel miserable for working so hard during. I don't have friends who understand, and I am guilty of ghosting my parents who will be homeless if I don't help them.

Wonder Women

Issue Fifty
Written by u/VoidKiller826
Edited by u/Predaplant
Arc: Revelations
*************************************************************
Greetings, people of Gateway City. This is your new peacekeeper speaking. You might know me as the White Magician, a rather crude name, but I will accept it considering Man’s World's lack of creativity. However, you may also call me Circe, and I am here with an important message that your news station will deliver for all to hear.
SCYTHE is no more: their HQ is under my and the Red Centipedes’ command. The Commander and his soldiers are dead and buried, as you all wished to happen. I was more than happy to oblige you if it meant depriving your stupid President of her next chance for reelection. Any survivors of the prison break are being hunted down by the people they locked in cages, who are more than happy to round them up as they once had been themselves.
But none of that’s important, for this recording is only to be heard by one person: Olympos, Wonder Girl, or whatever the fuck new title name you want to be called. This message is for you: You are to surrender yourself to me here in SCYTHE HQ in the next five hours, and in turn, I will not destroy this piss-end of a city. If you fail, I promise you, I will make Coast City look like a picnic by the time I finish with Gateway.
That cow you call Wonder Woman is dead, and I will make sure everyone else will follow her if you don’t comply with my request.
Your mentor learned a valuable lesson when she tested my patience.
*************************************************************
Spears Apartment - Gateway City:
[...President Cale has announced the complete closure of all access to Gateway City following the prison break that occurred in SCYTHE’s holding facility hours ago,] said Cassandra Arnold from GateNews, the city’s main news station. [We still have an unconfirmed number of escapees following the message sent by the White Magician, but the President has assured GateNews a solution will be found.]
Vanessa Kapatelis watched the TV in dismay. Pacing back and forth in the Spears duplex apartment, she had the TV on to pass the time while Ares worked on helping Helena and Cassandra upstairs.
“Here,” Vanessa turned away from the TV to see Tanya Spears handing her a bottle of water. “Something for you to drink.”
“Thank you,” Vanessa accepted the bottle. “I would prefer a beer, but this will make do.”
“My mom has her wine collection in a locked cabinet,” Tanya noted, pointing at the kitchen. “She doesn’t know that I know that, but I can get you a bottle?”
Vanessa chuckled. “Thanks, but I don’t want a girl your age to be walking around with alcohol or to get you in trouble with your mom.” She twisted the bottle cap and slowly drank. “I needed that… it feels like I’ve been dry for months.”
“It’s actually been 3 hours,” Tanya said, sitting on the sofa and opening her tablet to look over the internet. “I hope what she said wasn’t true… about Wonder Woman not being around…”
Taking a seat by her side, Vanessa saw that Tanya was reading through the report on what happened to SCYTHE. The escaped convicts had taken control of the SCYTHE headquarters and equipment after killing many of the agents that had stood in their way.
Seeing the photo of SCYTHE HQ burning angered her. That place should represent the absolute shield of Gateway. Now, it had come under the control of the convicts that they were supposed to stop because of Aeeta Branwen. A name that had made her happy now belonged to a stranger who had lied to her all this time.
Memories of their most intimate moments came flooding back: their first conversation, their first date, their kiss, and the morning after their date in her apartment. It was a moment when she thought she could finally stop grieving and move on from what happened to Coast City. And now, that had been disintegrated into oblivion.
In anger, she crushed the bottle with her hand, spraying water all over the table and the floor.
“Shit!” Vanessa stood up, finally realizing her mistake. “I am sorry!”
“Oh, it's fine!” Tanya ran to the kitchen to grab some paper towels. “It’s just water.”
“I know it’s just…” Taking the paper towel, the two began wiping the floor and the table. “I have a lot on my mind.”
“I’ll bet with everything that happened,” said Tanya, giving Vanessa a supportive smile. “Your friends are getting hurt, and you can’t do anything but watch. It would piss anyone off. I know it did with me when the RedCent guys invaded EE Tower.”
“Yeah…” Vanessa sat back on the sofa. “But this… I not only possibly lost many friends, but I was betrayed by someone I loved, someone who I thought was the one for me…” she said, distraught, as tears ran down her face.
Tanya, without saying anything more, hugged Vanessa closely. Despite them knowing each other for only a few hours, Tanya knew that Vanessa was in pain. Watching her loved ones being hurt by someone that she trusted must have been a hard truth to accept.
The doors upstairs opening and closing caught the two’s attention. Looking up, they saw Somya Spears descending, looking exhausted, like she had gone ten rounds in the ring. As she reached the ground floor, Tanya ran up to her mother, hugged her close, and guided her to the nearest chair to rest.
“Is everything alright, mom?” Tanya asked, worried.
“Yeah… just felt that I might take that long overdue vacation…” Somya answered, leaning against the soft chair with a tired sigh. “Maybe we’ll go to Paris like you wanted, Tanya…”
More steps followed, and Ares, or Mars as he insisted to be called, followed Somya, pulling his folded-up sleeves back. Unlike Somya, he didn’t seem any different from when he went upstairs to help the Sandsmarks, but the few strands of hair on his face told a different story.
“How are they?” Vanessa asked, walking up to the former God of War. “Are they ok?”
Ares turned to Vanessa. “The girl has a lot of heart, far too stubborn to let a beating keep her down.” He said with praise, impressed with the former Wonder Girl’s willpower. “Her Sumerian blood will help her heal in only a few days, but it won’t help her mental wounds after I told her the news about her mother.”
Vanessa had a lot of questions about what he had said, especially the word Sumerian; perhaps Cassie was not simply half-Olympian. However, she focused on the most important detail in his explanation. “What happened with Helena?” She asked in a worried tone. “Is she-”
“She is alive,” Ares said, but his expression shifted, frowning, making her nervous. “Physically, she will recover, she has only a few cuts and bruises. Even a human like her can heal those.”
“But?”
“But it's the spell Circe struck her with. It is unlike anything I’ve seen because it is of her creation,” Ares explained, and Vanessa ground her teeth together when she heard the name belonging to the stranger who hurt her and her loved ones. “Whatever she used, it is affecting her very soul, slowly killing her.”
“Like a virus?” Vanessa asked, and Ares nodded. “Magic can do that?”
“It does,” Ares answered. “Magic can create a nuclear bomb if the user has the patience for it. And Circe is a master at it, one of the very best and most gifted witches on the planet, so making something like this would be as easy as making a cake for her.”
Magic had never been SCYTHE’s priority, but the Commander still made them study anything related to the subject in case they had to face it. Vanessa had never expected to see it at this scale.
“Can you break it?” Vanessa asked. “Find a way to break the curse from Helena’s soul?”
Ares took a deep breath, pocketing his hands. “It’s too complex to break. I will admit Magic is not my strongest suit, but even if you bring in someone knowledgeable, it would be a while for them to break her creation,” he explained. “You need someone at her level of knowledge when it comes to magic, and I am not the best person to face her in that department.”
“Then we call for a specialist, anyone, really,” Vanessa said in desperation. “If this is like a virus, a curse, then we bring a surgeon to cut it out! Maybe Cassie can use her Justice Legion connection, or maybe you can call someone for a favor.”
Vanessa's desperation was clear. She was willing to call for the Justice Legion, the very people she swore to go against for their vigilantism, if it meant saving Helena Sandsmark, her promise be damned.
“The spell is growing far too rapidly. By the time you find someone, it will be far too late,” Ares said solemnly. “The only person in the world who can break the spell without any problem or fear of failsafe is Hecate, the Goddess of Magic. She was Circe’s mentor, and she taught her everything she could about magic. No matter how complex it is, Hecate would understand it.”
“She can help us?”
Ares shook his head. “No, she has no interest in helping the world unless it is connected to her directly, and even then, dealing with her is the worst-case scenario because there is a chance she’ll side with Circe before she even thinks of helping us.”
“So what now?” Vanessa asked, sounding defeated. “Just let Helena die? Let Cassie suffer? Let Circe win?!” she shouted angrily, finally addressing Circe by name. All of this explanation from Ares told her one thing: that the Witch had them beat, and they couldn’t do anything about it.
Ares didn’t react to her outburst, while the Spears looked worried. Tanya, for her part, tried to walk up to calm Vanessa, but the War God raised his hand to stop her, shaking his head and giving her the silent sign to let Vanessa be.
“There is one way: it will be quicker if we act fast enough, but it would take everything from all of us for it to happen,” Ares said, beginning his explanation. “There is a chain link connecting the spell, from the spell caster to Circe. This means it can be broken if we force Circe to release the chain connecting her to Helena…” he explained, letting his words be understood by the occupants in the room before finishing with one last note. “Killing Circe would also break the binding if she didn’t leave any contingencies.”
Vanessa gritted her teeth. “So we have to make her break the spell, and hopefully she doesn’t screw us over… or we kill her, and hopefully she still doesn’t screw us over even in death?” she asked, and Ares nodded. “What kind of person is willing to put in all that work? Just for revenge? On Diana, who is long gone?”
Ares shrugged and turned to the Spears, his gaze focused on Tanya, his daughter. Someone whom he never thought he would meet again was facing him, without knowledge of their blood relations.
“Possibly,” Ares answered, taking a step back. “But if there is one thing I know for sure, Circe does not put these kinds of bindings without any reason. Whatever that reason is involves Cassandra Sandsmark and whether she will choose to make Circe break the spell or kill her, tainting her forever.”
Silence came to the room, letting Ares’s words sink in for all occupants, which might have been the same words he said to the Sandsmarks.
*************************************************************
The room of Somya Spears was quiet, with the only sound being the breathing of Helena Sandsmark lying on the bed sleeping. The room was spacious, with an expensive queen-sized bed as expected from an interim CEO of one the largest companies in the world.
Seated a few feet away on a chair was Cassandra Sandsmark, dressed in fresh clothes given to her by Somya after throwing off the bloody tattered ones she had arrived in. Watching her mother closely, Cassandra’s mind was racing, especially after what Ares told her about the curse Circe placed on her mother, slowly destroying her soul bit by bit until she was nothing but a husk.
“Dammit!” In anger at their situation, she crushed the armchair, tearing its arm off like it was made of paper. If she was stronger, faster, and had the heart for it, she would have stopped the Witch, stopped her from hurting her city, the people of SCYTHE, and those caught in the crossfire, stopped her from hurting her mother…
She buried her face into her hands, tears running down her eyes as she despaired. Everything she worked on after Coast City evaporated was ground up under a very powerful enemy out for revenge.
Considering Circe’s ultimatum, her city could well be gone by the time this was over.
“Artemis… please be safe…” she whispered. She had nearly had a panic attack when she heard the news of the Amazon heading to SCYTHE HQ to stop the prison break, and then… nothing. No matter how many times she dialed her phone, there was no one answering, and she feared for the worst.
She heard her mother coughing, and Cassandra was quickly by her side. “Mom!” she called for her, holding her hand.
“Cassandra?...” Her mother said her name weakly. Her skin was becoming paler, a clear sign that the curse spell was working. “Are you… ok?”
“I’m fine, Mom,” Cassandra answered, covering the bandages hidden inside her clothes. “We’re safe. You’re safe.” she said, tightening both her hands around her mothers.
“Did you… break something?” She asked, looking at the chair behind her. “You shouldn’t be… doing that… we are guests…”
Cassandra laughed, her tears falling away. “Sorry… it’s just… it’s been a hell of a week…”
Helena touched her daughter’s cheek, noticing the bandage on it. “You’re… hurt…”
“It’s alright, Mom. Just a few bruises,” Cassandra assured. “You shouldn’t worry, you know I can take it…”
“I am your… mother, Cassandra,” Helena said, facing her daughter. “Demi-God or not… I will always be worried… scared for my little girl.”
Cassandra’s tears came back. Seeing her mother remain strong despite everything made her happy, and she was terrified of losing her.
“So… my soul is cursed?” Helena asked.
“You heard all that?”
“Can’t not… with all the swearing…” Helena noted, giving her daughter a small smile. “You shouldn’t swear at people, Cassandra, especially those who are trying to help.”
“I know, I know,” Cassandra said. She had gone off on Ares after he explained what happened to her mother, and she might have overreacted when she put all her anger on the former War God. “It’s just… I don’t want to lose you… not while we can fix this.”
Helena sat up on her bed, fully facing her daughter. “Which is why… I don’t want you to make the wrong choice.”
“I won’t,” Cassandra said with a low tone. “I will make Circe free you from this curse-”
“No, Cassandra,” Helena grabbed both of Cassandra’s hands with hers. “That is not what I meant…”
Cassandra raised her brows, confused. “Mom?”
“I heard everything… from Circe’s spell… how it works… and how it can be broken…” Helena said, shocking Cassandra. “I know you already decided what you feel you have to do.”
Cassandra didn’t answer, avoiding her mother’s disapproving gaze accusing her. Ares said the quickest way to break the binding and the spell was either by forcing Circe to break it herself or by killing her, severing the connection.
But if what Circe said was true, that Diana decided to kill her instead of making her surrender like everyone else who faced her, that means there was no chance the Witch would submit willingly. She would rather die than give the satisfaction of admitting defeat.
Which left only one solution where she could save her mother.
Helena sighed, knowing what decision her daughter might have made. She held her hand tightly and changed the subject. “I have to tell you something…”
“No, mom. You’re not giving me the ‘Dying Speech’, not while there is a chance we can save you-”
“It’s about your father,” Helena cut her off, shutting Cassandra up. “Your real father…”
Cassandra remembered Circe calling her Daughter of Enlil, not Zeus. Ares said he was a friend of her father, which confused her because Ares hated Zeus, so it wouldn’t make sense that he would help out even if they were his siblings.
“Enlil…” Cassandra said the name aloud, and Helena’s eyes widened, her breath hitching when she heard the name. “Circe… she called me Daughter of Enlil… Child of the Sky...”
Helena took a deep breath, bringing her daughter closer. “Yes… that is true…” she began. “You are not Zeus’s daughter, Cassandra, nor you are an Olympian in any way… but you are in fact… Sumerian… Mesopotamian,” The elder Sandsmark brought her youngest closer and spoke carefully, as if worried that someone might hear them. “Your father is Enlil, the Sumerian God of Wind… and he was the kindest man I have ever known…”
From then on, Helena explained Cassandra’s origins as carefully as possible, pushing on even while the spell affected her. She explained how she met Enlil, a man with golden hair similar to Cassandra’s, who introduced himself as an expert in Mesopotamian history during an expedition in Iraq. They had become rivals at first due to their clashing personalities, but how that developed into respect, to eventually falling in love after a very lengthy adventure that sounded like the plot of The Mummy.
And that love resulted in Cassandra’s birth. He helped raise her with Helena for the first year and a half before he disappeared because he had Olympian enemies and had to leave them to keep them safe.
While she explained all this, Cassandra’s mind went to another piece of critical information. Her father’s true identity had never been the most important thing for her. But what made it important was what Circe told her about Diana’s true reason for coming to Gateway City. It wasn’t just settling in a ‘piss-end of a city’ the more she taught about it, the more she realized the terrifying truth behind her mentor’s reasoning for coming to the city.
Diana was sent to find Cassandra, a Sumerian Demi-God, the Olympians greatest enemy since the Titans, and eliminate her. The prophecy of the Godkiller that they had feared might have come from Cassandra, but all it did was start a long, personal, and bloody war between two women because of the gods' demands for blood.
And now, she, Artemis, and Gateway City suffered the consequences. Even after Diana’s death, Circe would not let her hatred for what had happened to her go, and if it meant destroying her mentor’s legacy, she would do it.
‘Diana…’ Cassandra thought in sadness.
*************************************************************
SCYTHE Sub Base - Industrial District:
“I am not sure how you were able to do it, but you somehow found an ever more depressing place than that HQ of yours. It makes the cell you put us in look like a five-star hotel room,” said one Pamela Isley, formerly Poison Ivy, seated in the middle of a large room behind a large table. Around her were what was left of the SCYTHE agents they had saved during the escape, all working to get the makeshift base they had hidden up and running.
Alexei Abramovici, the Bloodcrow of SCYTHE, glared at the former supervillain, not happy with her comment. He turned to one of his men and began barking orders, “You! Get the goddamn Black Room working! We are running blind here!”
‘Worker drones even without their Commander.’ Pamela looked on unimpressed at the agents. She had never been that sympathetic to the plight of cops getting killed, especially militarized ones. The once mighty and feared peacekeepers of Gateway, who went to war against all the crime syndicates and the Red Centipedes, were now a mere little squad that won’t be able to protect a mini-mart, let alone every escaped convict under the command of the White Magician.
“Man… the signal here sucks!” complained Miguel Barragan by her side, raising his phone and trying to catch any kind of signal. “Could barely talk to my boyfriend when I called him, and can’t connect to the internet,” he complained. He tried once again to call but he couldn’t find a signal. “Useless brick…”
“We are underground in a bunker previously owned by Neo-Nazis, Barragan,” Pamela noted. From what she had heard, this used to be an old RedCent hideout that SCYTHE took over after the war, using it as a smaller base in case of emergency. “Not receiving any signal is part of the appeal of the place.”
“Bunker, huh…” Miguel chuckled. The name Bunker reminded him of the super name that he picked out; the more time passed, the more convinced he was that it was the right one.
Pamela gave a confused look at his expression and shrugged it off. Turning to her right, she saw the silent Emily Sung staring off into the distance. Unlike Barragan, Emily had other matters on her mind. Whatever she sensed or saw back at SCYTHE HQ freaked her out, like seeing something she shouldn’t.
Just as Pamela was about to ask her how she was feeling, a knock on the large blast doors echoed around the base, loud enough for all to hear. Quickly, everyone felt tense, and the SCYTHE agents covered the door as Alexei signaled them to aim their weapons. After the news of the escaped convicts taking control of SCYTHE HQ and their equipment and weaponry, the agents knew that they were being haunted now by the convicts looking for revenge, so they were not taking any chances.
“Would you mind opening the door!” A familiar voice said behind the door, a voice Pamela recognized right away. “I have a bloody Amazon here, and I would like her off my fur!”
“Barbara?” Pamela realized.
“Minerva? As in the Cheetah?” Alexei asked, eyes narrowed with suspicion. “She could be working with them, with the White Magician.”
“She isn’t,” Pamela answered, glaring at the SCYTHE soldier for the accusation. “She would never ally with the psychos you had under lock and key.”
Alexei scoffed. “That woman got a cemetery filled with people who say otherwise, and she hurt the mother of someone I know.”
Before the two could argue, Miguel stood up and decided to take action. He extended his hand, forming a large arm construct from it, and grabbed the handle of the blast door. With one pull, he opened it wide. Barbara entered. Her feline form made some of the SCYTHE agents tense, and weapons were still trained on her.
“Quite the welcoming committee…” she noted in sarcasm. “Now, would you be dears and get this woman some help?” She adjusted the unconscious and bloody Artemis on her back. Her blood covered Barbara’s fur.
“Medic!” Alexei called for an agent nearby before turning to Miguel. “And you, don’t use your freaky powers until I order you to do so.”
“Sorry tin man, I don’t speak fascist,” Miguel responded with a smirk, and Alexei glared at him.
The medic quickly came to Barbara and guided her to a nearby makeshift hospital room, which had a bed and various equipment to help the SCYTHE wounded. Barbara went in haste, and gently, with the help of the medic, they placed the injured Amazon on the bed, her blood soaking the white sheets red.
“How the hell did you even find us?” Alexei asked as he and the others entered. “I made sure I covered all our steps.”
“You did,” Barbara noted, stepping back to let the medic check on Artemis. She turned to Alexei and pointed at her nose. “But one of you has a very special pheromone that I can smell for miles,” she said with a smile as she turned her gaze to Pamela. “Still with those rose scents around you.”
The redhead smiled. “Maybe it’s that mark you left on me.”
“More than you think, Pammy.”
“Christ…” the medic gasped, catching everyone’s attention. “How is she still alive? And how long has she been like this?” He asked, examining the injured Amazon.
Her armor was wholly wrecked, beyond repair. Her headpiece was half broken, and the gauntlets and braces on her arms and legs were dented and unusable. Her injuries were severe: open wounds, slash marks, and burn marks were all over her body, and judging from blows on her armor, she might have had a few broken bones as well.
“Didn’t bother to look at the time with some of the grunts that were sent after us,” Barbara answered, leaning on a nearby chair as fatigue finally set in for her. “But these Amazons are too stubborn to die, and I know that from experience…”
The number of times Barbara thought she had beaten Diana only for the Amazon to get back up and beat her back was many, and it frustrated the woman to no end, but now she couldn’t help but be in awe at the resilience of these warriors.
“Her Amazon gifts will heal her,” Barbara noted. “But I am not sure how long it will take…”
“I doubt it will take more than a few days at least…” the medic noted, bringing out some bandages and wrapping them around her arms. “She will need a miracle to even walk out of here on her own two feet.”
“Uhmm…” Everyone in the room turned to Emily Sung, who stood by the doorway. “I… I think I can help her heal faster.”
Barbara and the medic gave her an odd look. To better explain it, Emily brought her hands together, and a small flame began to form from her palm. However, they weren’t bright orange flames; they were blue flames, and they didn’t feel any heat from them.
“I developed this technique while training,” said Emily. “It's a fire spell that doesn’t burn, but it heals people. I first used it on Miguel when he hurt his hands, and it was instantaneous,” she explained, and Miguel showed his fully healed hand as if he was demonstrating it. “But this will be the first time I will heal someone with this severe of injuries…”
Pamela and Barbara looked at the blue flames with wide eyes. In Pamela’s case, she was told that Emily had powers, and from Miguel’s description, she had the power of all the elements. However, seeing it firsthand and feeling it from just that tiny flame made her sense there was power behind it, warmth, like the sun.
“Do it,” Barbara said, taking a step back. “At this point, if we need magic to get her back into the fight, we better get to it before we lose her for real.” She turned to the shocked medic. This was the first time he would ever see magic in play. “And you, guide her in whatever wounds need to be healed.”
The medic nodded. It was better than nothing. With his guidance and Miguel’s support by her side, Emily went to work to heal Wonder Woman, who was in a state of life and death if they didn’t work fast enough, all while Circe and her crew were out there terrorizing the city.
“What’s the news out there?” Alexei asked after the three left the infirmary room. “We are in the dark here, and I couldn’t radio in anyone with the pieces of junk we got. Not even my brother, who was trying to get as many agents as possible.”
“Brother?” Barbara asked before she realized who his brother was. Her expression became solemn. She remembered the Warhammer who stayed behind to slow Circe and her crew, giving Barbara a chance to escape with Artemis on her back. “The guy with the Hammer…”
Alexei furrowed his brows, noticing the change in her expression. “What happened to my brother?”
Barbara took a deep breath and began explaining everything that had happened: the White Magician’s true identity, her taking over SCYTHE HQ, her ultimatum to Wonder Girl, and finally, Anatoly Abromivici’s sacrifice to save them.
*************************************************************
Somewhere in Gateway…
With the loss of SCYTHE and their headquarters, the surviving agents didn’t have the necessary support from the intel agents in the Black Room to fight off against the newly revived Red Centipedes, now grown more powerful with the help of the escaped convicts, more than happy to exact revenge.
With the bridges closed off, SCYTHE’s weakened state, and Wonder Woman being presumed dead, the city had been thrown into chaos. Streets filled with criminals and looters taking full advantage of what had happened, stealing anything from everyone across the island.
Red Centipedes roamed the streets with military trucks, taken from SCYTHE after their HQ had fallen to the White Magician’s control, making full use of their hardware to hunt down any surviving agent, delivering the message that they were the new peacekeepers of Gateway.
“Let me go!”
A woman, a worker from Taco Whiz, was being dragged from the streets by a group of RedCent grunts. Taken into a nearby corner, the RedCent dropped the worker on the dirty ground. Their eyes had terrible intentions behind them.
“Come on, man,” one RedCent grunt said from behind to his buddy. “We are supposed to find those SCYTHE fuckers, not mess around.”
“You’re serious?” The buddy looked at his friend like he was crazy. “We’ve been locked for months in SCYTHE’s cells; we can have a few minutes of fun.”
“Please! Don’t do this!” The woman screamed, tears falling from her eyes, afraid of what they would do to her. She tried to stand up and run away but was quickly pushed back down on the pavement.
The RedCent approached the woman, who crawled away from them in fear. “Come on, girl, I just need to release all this stress after being locked up for so long!” He proclaimed, giving the woman a leery look before turning to his buddy. “Hey man, I can share! Maybe we can get someone else from the street-”
The RedCent stopped speaking, catching his breath for a moment after he saw his buddy lying on the ground face first, knocked out cold. Looking up, his eyes widened in shock when he saw the person standing before him. “You’re… you were supposed to be dead?!”
Covered in heavy bandages and wrecked NIGHT armor, and carrying a mace in his hand and a pissed-off look on his face, Commander Hector Hall stood before the RedCent grunt like a dark spectre coming back to life. Kicking the knocked-out buddy aside, the Commander looked between the grunt and the terrified woman before he hardened his glare at the RedCent.
“Stay back!” The RedCent grunt aimed his weapon, hands shaking in fear. “I said stay the fuck back-”
In a moment, Hall moved at such a speed he looked like a blur, cutting the distance between the two. With one swing of his mace, he smacked him squarely on the head, sending him to the ground.
Hall turned to the woman he saved, who looked at him in horror. “Go… get to safety…”
Without another word, the woman ran toward the exit and into the streets, away from the alley. Now alone with the two RedCents, Hall grabbed the knocked-out buddy and woke him up, making the man see the bandaged-up Hall looking down at him with hateful eyes.
“You… I want you to send your boss a message…” Hall began, making him face the Commander. “Tell the White Magician, Circe, that I am declaring war on her and on anyone who stands by her side.” He turned and walked up to the other grunt, who was crawling away from the Commander in fear, grabbing his bleeding head. He begged for his life, but Hall ignored his pleas. “And this, this is for my men that you Centipedes have killed…”
He lifted his bloody mace and brought it down like a hammer on the begging Red Centipede as his buddy looked on in horror. He lifted it up once more to reveal the man’s head was crushed like a watermelon.
Commander Hector Hall was still alive, and as long as he was still breathing, SCYTHE would remain standing to fight against all threats against Gateway City.
*************************************************************

Wonder Women Vol 3.

Previous Issue <> Next Issue

At 11:18pm I 18 F received a call from my friends also 18 F contact. I picked up and said hello. The thing that replied was either the lord himself or a gay man who smokes 50 packs a day. No hate to you lord, love u. But it said “i heard someone had a birthday coming up soon” and when i tell you my heart dropped to my bumhole and sent me into cardiac arrest. that was NOT my friend and i lowkey dont want to know what got its hands on our contacts. But. my finger flew to that hang up button and i sat there for a good 15 mins sweating bullets hoping I make it to 19 im too young yo die bro. I text my friend saying. me- “ NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE i wanna live to see my 16th im too young for this what do you want from me” her- “y u call me ARE TOU OKAY OMG RU SAFE??“
She says she was asleep when her contact called me, and also had no idea what was going on. I thought she was trolling me until she told me she saw a missed call from MY contact at 11:17 pm. Meaning whatever used her number to call me, also used my number to call her BEFORE calling me. Only difference is I picked up. my phone app says “incoming call 11:18pm her says “missed call 11:17pm”
We are currently on a facetime call and she is reading the bible as I am trying to convince my mom to let me put a salt cross somewhere in the house. Yes we have both considered christening ourselves and drinking only holy water for the next week. Our only ideas are 1-God himself is calling to warn us about the rapture 2-Sat*n tryna say sum??😭😭😭(NONONONO PLEASE NONONON) 3-One of our male friends (either the narcissistic addict friend or the extreme catholic friend) is prank calling us because our birthdays are soon (mine is in 15 days hers is in two months) 4-A alternate universe phone line somehow contacted the wrong galaxy and called us to wish us happy birthday or something or the other.
My friend says she may know something related to it but doesn’t want to say it right now bc of superstition and i dont blame her bc im tryna make it through the tonight. Shes going to tell me after school tomorrow. The only other thing for now she told me was that the guy friend she always calls started speaking in some aggressive asian sounding language with his mom randomly as she was on call with him. he then hung up. my friend asked why he hung up, but he said he never hung up, only fell asleep. Thats all for now. I’ll update in the morning if anything else happens. Has anything similar happened to anyone else? Or anyone know what do to. Prayers? Preists? Popes? Pastors? Physics? Mediums? Satanists? Christians? Catholics? Pranksters? Phone line people? Normal people? Niggas? Please bro (im black) Thanks.

I don't know what to tag this. It IS a vent, and I do want comfort (and also kind of validation that this situation is not normal, is not appropriate, etc). Gonna put the latter. I've tried to write this post probably a hundred times and every time I break down. I don't know where to start. This is a shitstorm with a lot of personally identifying information. I've changed little details that are not relevant to the story, just in hopes of not being identified.
I am 17F. I am an unpaid and unrespected full-time caregiver to a female relative who adopted me at 11. My parents were abusive, and I haven't spoken to them since "mom" rolled away in a cop car to spend a month or so in jail. My mother was a teen mother, sort of—she got pregnant at 18. She and my father both did (and do as far as I know) drugs heavily, mom is bipolar, paranoid, violent. Dad is more of your "classic" alcoholic and you don't see a lot of cogs turning, like talking to a blank wall. Well, when my mother got taken to jail my aunt took custody and then adopted me. She has chronic illnesses and also was in a car accident when I was four, is physically disabled and has become more and more mentally unstable over the years as well. Around 13, she started losing mobility to the point of needing help. Well it just kept spiraling and spiraling. Now she needs help with everything short of wiping/bathing. She doesn't leave her room or do anything. If it gets done in the house, I do it—other than the 1x monthly housekeeper Louisia. And I do a pretty damn good job. But, oh my god, I am so tired. I have a lot of mental illnesses (all professionally diagnosed, don't speculate please), I take a pretty heavy medicine that can cause some side effects, I have physical problems but doctor never pinned down a specific diagnosis outside of a few abnormalities in my bloodwork and ultrasounds. I'm so exhausted all the time and I feel like my lifeblood has been sucked out of me. I have no joy, no hope. We hate each other, and the only reason she keeps me around is because I do everything from laundry to cleaning her room to bringing her food. I DO NOT have a better option in terms of housing and I am not facing any physical abuse. Please don't try to find my identity or anything. I just want to feel like a human being. She is the type to ask you to do a lot, and then get offended when you bring up the extent of her requests. I have no time to do anything for myself, and I spend every second thinking about how this is ruining me. I'm so angry. I could scream until I pass out. She is so petty and cruel, and everyone swears I'm the crazy one. I won't claim to be totally sane, my god, who would be? But the math is pretty obvious: if she's not leaving her room, even to go to the bathroom, who's doing everything? Casper the friendly ghost? As I said, I feel subhuman, unappreciated, unrespected. She always says "I love you but I don't like you", and I always say she can't name ANYTHING she likes about me. She misses and loves a version of me that died years ago both as a result of trauma and growing up. I try to be a good person, to do anything I can, but I just break down crying and yes I get angry and petty and argue with her. It doesn't help anything but I can't tell ANYONE because it's so absurd they don't believe me, other than my friends who I don't want to burden constantly as they are just teenagers and cannot come up with solutions any better than I can—and frankly comfort from people my age who don't understand only goes so far. I start to resent everyone and everything related to caring or domestic work; the enormity of my grief and anger poisons everything about me. I get angry at people i've never met (on the internet) for doing things like talk about being a housewife. I just think, my god, I want away from this so bad and they're advocating for it! I'm not cut out for this. I want to write poetry and cook food that I like and learn to play chess better and find my life's work. I have scoured books on therapy, have been in therapy, and all kinds of self help books and religions. None of them can cut out the root, which is that this life makes me want to run away and join the circus. I have so many talents and interests and days to live and they are being wasted on maintaining the life of someone who hates me and will never get better or appreciate what has been done for her.
Please don't DM without permission. Thank you so much.

Background : I am 21M about to turn 22. I am a recent engg. grad. I earn well for my experience (atleast according to standards of my country). I have a brother (15M) and Mom (43). My dad passed away 2 years back and my mom was always a stay-at-home-mom/doing gigs as a hobby, never as a neccessity.
My mom started to work when my dad passed but was treated v. poorly at the workplace she joined and was paid pennies for working 8-9hrs. She was fired after 6 months. She's been unemployed since then. I want her to have a comfortable life and I earn enough to provide (although at the cost of delaying my own plans for future). Recently she's started taking things for granted, asking for more and more money. Made me join a job that I hated when I got laid off just because "I should not forget that I have responsibilites" which I don't disagree. She just lays around at home doing nothing, not even the gigs she used to do. I asked her to get a job or atleast do something productive (not asking to make money, just do something atleast, start a venture, just anything other than laying around) where she starts crying and being emotional and says "Have I become a burden to everyone", "Pay me back for the years I spent raising you", "You're being hurtful", I don't know how to answer to that.
I endup becoming the villan. My brother says that I am being a tyrant just because I earn and provide doesn't mean I get to tell them what to do. My mom gossips to my nan (her mom) where I am portrayed as a bad son who in turn gossips to my aunts. None of them know or care about what I went through or am going through. I didn't come home for 6-7 months after my dad died and no one bothered to call. Not even my brother and mom (apart from the occasional one from her). My brother's a teen and I know kids that age have "f*ck you stay away you worthless pos" attitude towards authority figures but goddamn does it hurt. I feel like an ATM being tossed around.
My dad left some property which now my mom owns. I asked for a loan on my half of the inheritance to my mom for masters (I can't get an education loan without collateral or really bad terms) she agreed first but stated that I would be abandoning any right to the inheritance if she does that which I agreed to but later she refused stating its her property and my half is the of what will be left of it and my brother needs it more than me for his education (I paid for my own college fees). Whatever's left after that will be divided.
I feel like my mom's the kid and I'm the parent. I see everyone my age cruising around, getting a break and I envy them. Yes I make waaaaaaay more than what my peers by god's grace make but that's at the cost of my mental health. Also making money amounts to nothing since all my money goes to my family.
Am I greedy or irresponsible for wanting a break? How do I deal with this.

This is my first time posting so I’m sorry if it doesn’t make much sense or I’m trauma dumping a lot also a couple trigger warnings, I’m not sure where to start off with. Me and my mom used to be pretty close I’d say up until I started high school. Middle of eighth grade I moved to a new city so I was back to trying to find some friends. I’ve been moving around since I could remember, I used to live in Germany where I moved twice, then moved to the US around the Silicon Valley, moved again, and again and again now we’re here. I wouldn’t be explaining this part of my life if I felt like it didn’t have any weight in this situation. Middle school I found a friend, me and her got pretty close, stuck through Covid together. My mom hated her and not even two years into our friendship my mom started accusing her of stealing from us, being a bad influence and overall just being trashy. Her parents were in the middle of getting a divorce and she had a lot of things going on in her life. I dyed my hair red during this time too while being friends with her, she probably was a huge influence on me but that’s also because it was covid and I was bored and who doesn’t start irrationally bleaching and coloring their hair at 14. I think my mom thought she was a bad influence on that part too because she's the one that first started off coloring her hair like purple and pink etc. My mom never of course said anything to my friend but she made sure I would hear of her disapproval concerning her bad influence in my life. I stopped being friends with her freshman year since my parents banned me from having her over or going to her house, I couldn’t drive neither could she and hanging out at each other's houses was pretty much what we did 80% of the time. I was so frustrated and felt trapped because the only friend I really cared about was someone I wasn’t allowed to associate with anymore. I told her I was done being friends with her over text and blamed it on me just being in a dark place and breaking it off. She was confused and called me a week later about something personal but I just dismissed it. Granted there were other things going on in our friendship but I felt terrible about it especially since her parents were going through that divorce and I just left during such a sensitive time. I hate to admit it but I felt so much better since I started making new friends quickly and started sitting with a new group the next day. Mostly guys and other two girls, it worked out fine for the next year. Junior year my grades started dropping so my parents got stricter, started taking my phone, looking through it, screen time etc. I felt like it was a huge invasion of privacy since my mom would look through my texts. Me and my mom also started arguing weekly about whatever it was but when I mean arguing I mean like full on yelling for two hours down in the living room with no stopping. I can’t do anything about it because whenever I say something remotely disproving her so called “facts'' since she always speaks with so much authority on subjects she wouldn’t even know about I’m the one that has to quiet down from my fathers perspective, and I know this will be mostly about my mom but me and my dad have always been close even when we’re fighting within a week we at least make it up. We play the same sports, have the same humor etc. I understand this might look like us disregarding my mom and I know she cares and loves me yet in certain circumstances she doesn’t show it so of course there’s going to be reasons as to why I’m closer with my dad than her. For example I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes in 4th grade and of course I wouldn’t expect anyone to know that when you're low you need carbs or when your blood sugar is high you need insulin but my mom to this day still does not understand it. I wouldn’t care even if it’s my friend but as my mom you take so much authority over my life and who I can’t or can hangout with but you don’t know the basics of how I have to manage my life behind closed doors in the house that you and I live in every day. That might sound overdramatic but it’s just something I think about. Also growing up, I’m an only child by the way, I would always play by myself whenever we went on vacation for example to the beach etc. it was always my dad that came and played with me in the sand while at sharing his time with me and my mom so my mom wouldn’t gets upset over him leaving her to go play with me. Even now I notice how my mom would always make snarky comments regarding how my dad always treats me like a princess and cares too much over me. Anywho, since I know this is getting pretty long I’ll try to sum it up a bit more. I started liking one of the guys from that group, I would text him on a daily basis just about whatever. We were pretty awkward in person since I’ve never really talked to that many guys and I don’t think he really had much experience either so we stuck it to mostly phones, everyone else in the group also didn’t know. Once my mom went through my phone on one occasion that night, because she would collect it on some nights and read through my messages in bed she saw one message from that guy calling my mom bipolar and me responding with something like it’s fine like I still love her she freaked out. She told me to never talk to him again and that I’m a brat for talking about my family issues outside of the family etc. I honestly had nobody to talk to. The other two girls in the group didn’t really talk to me at this time, I later became really close with one of them though more on that later and I had no other friends in that town so it was really only him. He had a plethora of family issues that I couldn’t even imagine so I felt like he understood where I was coming from at times better than other kids with American parents. Not sure I mentioned but my parents were both born in Eastern Europe and grew up during heavy communism so that definitely affected them and their parenting style. Anywho, my mom sent me a paragraph to show to him, basically telling him to never talk to me again and that he has to apologize to her etc. After a couple months I think he took me out on a date. I'm not sure what to make of it since it was pretty casual. We just got ice cream. I told my parents that he was only picking me up so we could meet with the rest of the group when of course we’re not. The rest of the guys saw us downtown and found out about it. That kinda really sucked since I’m pretty sure one of them liked me so he got really mad and it kind of ruined the group dynamic. The guy I liked stopped talking to me a couple months in since I couldn’t really do much or go anywhere and dating as a result would be hard so he stopped really talking to me it was pretty off and on since I would get mad stop texting him and then he would try to get back texting at me and once I showed him I cared he’d stop. I was so mad at him and the situation that I refrained myself from talking to him, two weeks later he killed himself. I found out because one of the guys from the group faced me and told me. I went downstairs and started crying and formed the sentences explaining it the best I could, pushing a couple words out at a time. In that very moment I felt so hurt and vulnerable by what just happened my mom responded by just looking at me and saying that he had it coming for him since he probably vaped and drank. My dad ran downstairs since he probably heard me crying and the first thing he did without asking me any questions was hug me. For the first time ever he told my mom to shut up since her trying to ask me questions about how he died just made me sob harder. Over the next week my mom was pretty lenient about letting me go out. The next week she started asking what happened to him. Me and my mom were not close at all anymore at this time. You see mothers and daughters talking about guys or what dress they’re gonna wear to the prom etc in the movies. Me and my mom are not like that. On top of that I was overwhelmed with what happened and as someone does overthinking how things could have played out differently. Anyway I refused to tell her anything saying I was too uncomfortable and over the course of the next couple months of senior year she would get progressively mad and irritated at me to the point of arguing and yelling at me for not trusting her and telling her how he killed himself. I to this day told her nothing but she stopped asking. I don’t know how my dad feeds into this since he’s always so Switzerland about everything when I know I’m right in an argument between me and my mom, however when my mom has leverage he takes her side. Anyway, the beginning of senior year was rough. I hated being in that house and really started seriously considering the only options I felt like I had at the time. I started becoming closer to that one girl from the group earlier, spoiler alert my mom strongly dislikes her now too since she’s a liar and since she’s close with her mom but not her dad that means her parents are having marital issues and therefore her mom is a cheater etc. I don’t understand how she goes from one topic to another and sorts these things into her head. She’s my only friend that I’m really close with and I have been for the past these almost two so hearing this is very disheartening since I’m sending off senior year and I can’t do this again being so close to the end of the year. I forgot to mention but during homecoming I drank for the first time and I had one of my guy friends with his girlfriend and that friend that I’m not friends with drop me off. When he dropped me off he didn’t wave to my mom so she now thinks he’s a bastard in her words and disgusting and she deserves and apology for all the times he’s been over to my house etc. which I honestly think is insane because how do you always have so many issues over my friends and why are you so obsessed with 16 year olds, like you really have beef with high school kids as a 50 year old. Anyway the reason I bring that up is because I invited him over a couple weeks ago for some drills to help one of my other friends with mma since me and him used to wrestle and my mom got mad despite him not being there for me but for my other friends benefit. I’m not sure if this makes any sense. I'm trying to explain the issue best I can without saying too much. Anyway my friend, the one that I’m friends with now, the girl and that guy from the group that didn’t wave at my mom are both Latin so my mom started calling them cheaters and dirty etc when they had nothing to do with anything. This argument spiraled over me asking my mom if I can have a sleepover with those friends since we want to bring a new series on Netflix. Also during prom I asked my parents for 10 dollars since I already had twenty in my account and I wanted to buy hair stuff for prom. They gave me the 10 and I said how I was going to catch a ride with friend A so that when friend A picked me up but friend B that I did not mention in the plan picked me up my parents started calling and texting me. To give some background friend B has been close with me since freshman year, probably the only friend my mom has liked and also the only white friend I have not sure if that has anything do with it but there’s that. She’s really sweet and has been invited over multiple times to my house by my parents, they do really like her. Anywho yet since I didn’t mention that friend B was driving the car since my parents didn’t recognize the new car and knew it wasn’t friend A driving yet assumed it was indeed friend B but since I didn’t mention that they took all the money I had in my account which was only 30 dollars but it was what I needed to get my nails and hair gloss and hair spray for prom, I just started breaking down in the middle of target. I was so excited to get my stick on nails etc since I couldn’t afford to get the acrylics since I was paying for all my prom stuff for the most part. By the way I know that the 10 dollars was initially there so I understand taking away that but the other 20 I made selling my clothes on mercari and I had nothing else like no other cash nothing that was the money I worked on to get my prom stuff. It was mostly my dad actually that got mad at this point taking my money etc and than following a got a text from my mom saying I got what I was coming for by acting the way I have been. There were 3 others with me while I was at target so having three of my friends see me breakdown from me only having 14 cents left in my account was so humiliating. I ended up looking great at prom neither less so don’t even worry about that, my hair looked great and I found some old stick-ons in my laundry room and painted them white lol a couple of them popped off during prom but whatever. This has been really long and thanks to whoever spent their time reading through all of this I’m sorry if the read is a bit of a struggle but I just don’t know what to think or do of this situation. Keep in mind I’m 18 now, never have had a boyfriend, never have do anything, kissed, even held hands romantically etc. it’s one thing you know to not care about any of that but the thing is I do and I want to experience being a teenager and going out and going on dates and not worry about my mom flipping out on one of my friends. While we were in Italy one of the tour guys told her to move on the bus to make more room for others and she started cussing him out telling him to f himself etc for telling her a paying customer where to sit. Everyone started staring at us. I did not want to be there. I just kept my head down the entire time and didn’t really talk to my mom out of embarrassment for the next two days. Also after that prom incident I wasn’t allowed to go anywhere after as a result of go to friend B's birthday bash the next day so my mom texted her without my knowledge and told her not to tell me about how I’ve been acting up and one day I’ll learn when I’m her age but it will be too late and that I don’t know what I’m doing and finishing off my apologizing on my part for my behavior and I’m the reason why I can’t go to her party. Which I find so infuriating because one of the main reasons why I don’t tell my mom anything about my personal life is because I simply don’t want her to have that control of knowing what my life is like, I probably tell the teacher I TA for more than my own biological mother. The fact that she preached family issues in the family so heavily and that you should never talk about issues to others yet goes behind my back and tells my friend that my indecent behavior is the reason why I can’t go is so beyond me because where did your ideals go that you preached so heavily about. Every time I’m around my mom especially when she has her flares of anger I just start shaking like you know when you drink something with a lot of caffeine in the morning and you don’t eat anything so mid way through the day you just start getting jittery and anxious, kind of like that. Ok I think I’m done anyway thank you for tuning in cause I really have to start studying for human geo, thanks for reading up until here 🙂.