What happened to VPR in your bio and what's going on? (Timestamp: 2:04) - Scheana: So to be honest, my sister does all of my links and that stuff on Instagram for me. I didn't even notice that it was taken out of my bio until everyone else did. I think maybe when she put the Sweet and Sour song in, she took out VPR because there were too many things in my bio. - Scheana: Also, for 11 years, I've never had anything VPR in my bio until we were nominated for an Emmy. James Kennedy and I worked together the day we found out and we're like, who could put it in their bio faster? What emoji should we use? - Scheana: And we both put it in our bio and then lo and behold, we didn't win the Emmy. And what was it? Emmy nominated VPR was in my bio for, I think just around the Emmy time and then my sister took it out. - Scheana: So literally no other rhyme or reason, nothing else going on there. It just, too many things in the bio just make it a little too cluttered looking and you know, I'm OCD. So I guess she just wanted to keep it clean.
Do you wish you guys have been able to break the fourth wall more? Are there any moments from past seasons where you wish that it happened? (Timestamp: 3:22) - Scheana: Yes, honestly, I think that is so interesting when you're watching a reality show and they talk about the show on the show. - Scheana: They do this on Kardashians. They do this on the D'Amelio show. And I just think that makes the reality even more real because there are things that happen in press on Watch What Happens Live at the reunion last year. - Scheana: There are things that you want to address where you have to say like, oh, well the last time we were in New York together, I noticed they were doing that on the first episode of Real Housewives of New Jersey. And we used to do that all the time on the show. Sometimes you just want to be like, look at the reunion last year, but you have to say like, well the last time we all got together. - Scheana: And it's just easier and I think it makes sense if you just say, well, you said this on Watch What Happens Live, not I heard you said. And so I do hope moving forward with the way our season ended that we're able to have more moments like that because I think it just adds to our reality. And there have been so many things in the past. - Scheana: I can't even think off the top of my head, but yeah, many moments where I wish we could just talk about the show on the show. But I also understand why they don't like to do that. And I think it's only really meant for important moments. So, hopefully there is a season 12 and maybe we see a little more of that.
How are you feeling after Reunion 1 aired? (Timestamp: 4:56) - Scheana: Well, I have not looked on anything said on social media. I felt like watching the episode, it was a pretty good one. I think the next two are gonna be definitely more dramatic from what I remember. I feel like I tend to emotionally blackout after Reunion days. - Scheana: And I'm like, wait, what happened? What did we say? And then we have to watch it back. But that's the beauty of reality TV is you gotta watch back your life, the good, the bad, the cringe, all of it.
Is there anything you wish we got to see this season but didn't? (Timestamp: 5:35) - Scheana: There are a few things, but there's also a secrets revealed episode that is going to air, I believe only on Peacock, after the third part of the reunion the following week. - Scheana: So you'll see some new interview bites. We did some doubles there, which is really fun. And you'll see some scenes that didn't make it in. - Scheana: One of them is my sister's birthday and Valley Brat launch party. So that was a really fun day. Almost the entire cast was there. Katie and Tori were there. And I'm excited to see that. I haven't seen it yet, but I know that that's one of the scenes that we should be seeing. Stay tuned.
Anything you wish you said at the reunion that you didn't get a chance to say? (Timestamp: 6:20) - Scheana: I haven't seen the last two episodes of The Reunion yet, so I'm not sure what all will be included. You'll have to ask me again in two weeks.
What are you planning to do on the VPR break? (Timestamp: 6:34) - Scheana: Reflect, grow, learn. I'm going to be working on a dream project of mine this summer, so I'm very, very excited about having time to do that and not figuring out how I'm going to juggle that with filming five days a week. I'm going to get to enjoy a summer off for the first time in like 12 years and the first time as a mom. So I'm really looking forward to having some downtime focusing on some other projects. - Scheana: Summer starts preschool and yeah, it'll just be nice to finish getting stuff done in our house. We're almost fully furnished, not completely yet. We still got some tweaks and add some little accent pieces, need some artwork in the living room, but I'm just excited to have time with the family and in the new house. - Scheana: And as crazy as it sounds being in the desert in the summer, I love being in Palm Springs. Even if it is 120 degrees outside, there's just something about my house. It's so peaceful. - Scheana: And now that we have Lala next door, I mean, we have both of our houses close to each other, but we'll definitely be out there a bunch this summer.
How do we feel about the next season being on hold? (Timestamp: 7:55) - Scheana: I think this break is needed. Honestly, I think it is the smartest decision to not jump right back in to another season like we did after Scandoval. I don't think enough time had passed. And I feel like if we gave it a little more time to breathe, things would have been a lot different. - Scheana: But I don't know, maybe we needed to jump back in as soon as possible to capture what was still happening. But for right now, after that reunion and how dramatic the season ended, and as you guys know, we all watched the last part of the finale together in front of each other for the first time, which was extremely emotional. I feel like all of us need a little bit of an emotional break. - Scheana: Some from each other, some from the cameras. I need a couple more EMDR sessions before I go back into another season. But I think giving us some time off to let some new story build up, follow some of the projects that we've been working on. - Scheana: And yeah, I think it is very needed and I think it'll be good in the end. I didn't know how I felt about it in the beginning, but the more I've sat with it, I'm like, yeah, this is the right decision.
What did you make of Ariana voting No It's Done on that IG fan poll asking do you think there will be a season 12 of VPR? (Timestamp: 9:18) - Scheana: Well, as her friend, I fully support her pursuing her dreams. I always have. I've said that multiple times. It's like if VPR and reality TV no longer serve her, then on to the next thing. She's going back to Broadway. She's doing Love Island. - Scheana: She has so many amazing things lined up. I don't even know what else is in the pipeline for her, but I'm sure many more amazing things. So if it's time to move on, it's like I completely get it. - Scheana: As her coworker, if this is true, I mean, it's kind of frustrating that she would advocate for the end of a work project that is a big part of my business and what Lala and I as moms do to support our families. - Scheana: So that's what's tricky too with this show is our life is our job and our job is our life. And as a friend, I understand and respect boundaries. As your coworker, there can be moments where it's frustrating. So that's how I feel about that.
What are your hopes for season 12? (Timestamp: 10:40) - Scheana: Well, I hope that we have one. First of all, the finale did feel very series ending, but I think it also opens up the door for a new beginning. I think there are still so many stories to be told among this group. - Scheana: And maybe with ending the season with the fourth wall breaking down, maybe that opens up the door to more of that for hopefully season 12. I think we have a really interesting story to tell moving forward. And I think there's going to be a lot left to tell.
How do you feel about Ariana not watching the season? (Timestamp: 15:28) - Scheana: Look, I get that it can be difficult to watch back sometimes. And I am a person who season six did not wanna watch back that relationship. And that relationship with Rob doesn't even compare to her relationship with Sandoval. - Scheana: So I understand she was busy, she was working, she was living in her happy bubble in New York, doing Chicago, and probably didn't wanna let anything get into her orbit, burst her bubble. I did the same thing when I was doing my show in Las Vegas. And I was performing every night on stage. - Scheana: I didn't want any of that going into me going on stage. So I get not wanting to disturb your peace. It's like she was literally living her dream at the moment that the show was airing. - Scheana: But with that being said, she wasn't watching the season, but she was keeping up on social media. And that's the thing that's hard for me because she's seen clips. And I know this does get addressed later in the reunion. - Scheana: I don't know what will air. I just remember speaking about it. But she was basing her perception off of fan clips and commentary. Like I know she even said on Watch What Happens Live that one of the things that hurt her the most was seeing the backup dancer comment I made. - Scheana: And in context that was honestly never meant to be shady. It was a cheeky comment where I'm actually like making fun of myself. I mean, I am not Beyonce, okay? It was a joke. But for her to say that really hurt her, I'm like, damn girl, like I didn't mean it in that way. - Scheana: But if you did watch the whole season and Andy asked her, did you see the conversation Scheana had with Sandoval? I felt like that conversation, I was having her back. I was advocating for her and her mental health and the things that he had done that were wrong outside of the affair. - Scheana: She never even watched that. She says that she lived the show, so she didn't need to watch it back. But there were all of the moments that she wasn't there for that I do wish she watched back because I think she would have a bigger picture of how I was being a good friend to her. - Scheana: So for her and Katie to say that they felt like I was a better friend to Sandoval this season, I definitely don't think I was a better friend to Sandoval. I don't think I was a good friend to Sandoval at all. Did I treat him like a human? Sure.
Is Summer Moon's half sister really named Winter Sky? (Timestamp: 22:51) - Scheana: No, I think someone online made that up. It's been circulating. That is not her middle name. It's not for me to say what her middle name is, but it's absolutely not Sky or anything close to that or seasonal.
Why do you think Katie spoke one way about Ariana off camera versus on camera? Do you think it was because she wanted to protect Ariana's feelings or was she worried about the backlash from the fans if she said anything critical about Ariana? (Timestamp: 24:36) - Scheana: I don't necessarily think it's either. I think it was and has been a business decision for them to remain a united front. They've made a lot of money on something about her. - Scheana: So I get, you know, not wanting to affect their business and I fully support that. I know what Lala said at the reunion, she felt that Katie was being fake by acting one way on camera and different behind the scenes. But I mean, I think Katie was probably prioritizing her brand as she was making, you know, probably more from that than from the show. - Scheana: So as a friend, I understand and respect the business decision. But you know, again, as a coworker, it's frustrating when you're not living your truth. So I get it. - Scheana: But it's like, we all show up and do the uncomfortable stuff. And when others aren't, it is frustrating. And if you do act differently on and off camera, you're probably going to get called out for it. - Scheana: So you should be prepared. If you say something on a phone call, just like Brock said something to Lala in private season nine, you know, just because it's off camera doesn't mean it's not going to get brought up on camera. So being authentic always is the only way to be on reality TV, honestly.
Do you see Lala's hypocrisy when it comes to her critique of Ariana's boundary needs, like Randall? (Timestamp: 29:34) - Scheana: I think it's different situations. Honestly, Lala and Randall weren't coworkers. If Randall had been on the show, I think it would be a different story.
How do you feel about Lala saying you were living in the comments section? (Timestamp: 29:50) - Scheana: I think it's more the concept that I let public perception get to me as I really don't spend a lot of time in the comments section. I read the first 20 to 30, as those are usually people I follow and friends, and then I'll see the next couple, but once there's a negative one, I'm like, okay, let's put this away. - Scheana: So it's like if I did fully live in the comments section, it would not be good for my mental health. And I mean, of course I care when people are mad at me. I'm a people pleaser as we know, but I'm also working on that.
Do you agree with LVP that a Lala and Schwartz coupling would be a beautiful thing? (Timestamp: 30:29) - Scheana: No.
Do you agree with Lala that Ariana got cheated on and then made it her whole personality? (Timestamp: 30:31) - Scheana: No, I don't agree with that either. If anyone has made it their personality, that would be more fitting of the other woman involved.
What do you think happened in NYC with Jax, Tom and Victoria after Watch It Happens Live? (Timestamp: 30:54) - Don't know, don't care.
Why aren't you and Sandoval talking much now? (Timestamp: 31:00) - Scheana: I mean, Sandoval and I haven't talked much in over a year since pre Sandoval, so nothing really has changed.
Tom said in a recent interview that he's not getting a redemption arc, but a re humanizing. Do you agree? (Timestamp: 31:14) - Scheana: I mean, whatever it is, I think he probably blew it. And even just watching him on Watch What Happens Live this season, it's like, yeah, you really haven't changed, buddy. - Scheana: You know, I did try to do what Scheana always does and see the tiny bit of good still left and the soul still there, but yeah, you know, whatever
If Tom told LVP that he was suicidal, why was he still filming? Did she get him help? (Timestamp: 31:47) - Scheana: That is a great question. You'll have to ask her that. From what I know, if he was feeling that way during filming, he would have to be in therapy and like talking to a psychiatrist regularly. But yeah, I don't know too much else about that.
Now that the dust has settled, do you think Tom made you look dumb? Do you regret it? (Timestamp: 32:08) - Scheana: I wouldn't give him that much power, TBH. If you think I looked dumb, it was my own doing. I don't regret any of my actions. I don't regret trying to still see some good in someone who had been a very good friend to me for many years, leading up to filming the show from the beginning. - Scheana: Tom and I were very close. We were close for the first few seasons. Season three, I felt like, was it two or three? Whenever Miami Girl and the whole that came around, I did feel like I was seeing a different side of him, the side that we all saw last year. I didn't think he was good for Ariana. - Scheana: I voiced my concerns to her mom. I stand by all of those things that I said back then, but when Ariana convinced me that he was a good person, he didn't do this and I needed to get off this or I was gonna lose her as a friend, I immediately just got over it. I made him my brand again and we built such an insanely strong bond from season two or three, whenever that was, up until Scandoval - Scheana: Although we were not speaking a ton leading up to all of this stuff, I think he knew what he was doing and that's why he started distancing himself from me. That's why Rachel started distancing herself from me because they knew they were being shady for seven months. - Scheana: So Tom and I not speaking that much right now is no different than the seven months leading up to Scandoval. But it's like also with Tom, I've had conversations with him on and off camera and I've tried to get through to him to snap him out of this downward spiral to start showing some empathy and deference towards Ariana, but it's been over a year now and he hasn't really been able to do that. - Scheana: It's like, regardless of who this man was in the past, I do have to accept the reality that that is not who he is now. It's been a hard pill for me to swallow and to watch back, but I think part of me maybe hoped that he had temporarily lost his mind and could be just shaken back to reality. - Scheana: I hoped that he could be genuinely remorseful, but I don't think he is. I felt like there were moments of it where the mask came down and I saw that Tom, and then he's just gone again. And then he says dumb shit that he tried to defend on Watch What Happens Live. - Scheana: (Does a Sandoval impression) “I was like, well, no, I was saying it was good for me. I did my job.” And it's like, no, that's not how you meant. And that right there, it's like Tom, right when you're starting to take a few steps forward, you just fully bury yourself again. I just, I don't get it, but I guess I do.
Do you see how much Sandoval manipulated you in the finale with that final scene? Can't you see through Tom's narcissism? The man has repeatedly lied to you, put you in legal peril, and he takes cheap shots at you by bringing up the Eddie thing. When are you going to wake up and realize this man doesn't care about you (Timestamp: 35:00) - Scheana: Wow, that's a loaded question. Look, a lot of things happened this last year that have changed my perspectives on various people and relationships in my life. Tom and I were friends, as I just said, for so many years, and years before VPR, and it's like viewers have only seen a small fragment of that friendship on the show. Same can be said for all of my castmates. - Scheana: Tom and I are always going to be tied together through this show and our long history, but we're never going to have a friendship like we had before. It's impossible to go back when so much has been broken. Like not just the friendship broken, but the trust shattered. - Scheana: I mean, and I haven't really necessarily seen the growth in him that would merit my energy being fully put back into rekindling a full friendship with him. So I'm not going to try and build that back up if I'm not seeing that from him.
Following you these last years on the show, listening to the podcasts and vlogs, it really felt like you would finally found your voice in this group once you had cut ties with Tom Sandoval. Now that he's back in the picture, you seem to have lost it. How can we help get that voice back? (Timestamp: 36:24) - Scheana: Look, I'm working on it. As hard as it is to watch back sometimes, one of the benefits of reality show life is the added perspective that comes with it. So in due time, I am doing my best. I really genuinely am. I'm trying.
If Rachel tried to reach out to you now, would you respond? If so, what would you say? (Timestamp: 40:22) - Scheana: Oh, I don't think I'm ever gonna hear from that girl, so I don't know what I would say, honestly.
Do you think that Rachel was groomed by Sandoval? (Timestamp: 40:30) - Scheana: I mean, that part of their dynamic was nowhere near me, so I wouldn't be able to answer that.
***end of recap

I wouldn’t say she’s evil or she’s a mean girl. She seems pretty nice to her fans, donates to charities, Pays the people who helps her with her tour generously. But I think most people need to stop treating her like this Little 15 year old innocent Girl who doesn’t know anything about the world. Her fans need to face the fact that’s she’s a 34 year old Woman and she can handle her own problems, she doesn’t need strangers or the swifties to defend her. Anyways, back to the original meaning of the post: Taylor is Fake.
Ok! I’m sorry I said it but someone had too!!! All of Taylor’s Friends and Relationships seem like PR (not all of them) I can name some examples, Ice Spice PR, Travis Kelce, etc. These are just a few examples I know every celebrity needs PR but Taylor swift is literally the Queen of PR. And her fans are horrible people (Twitter swifties are the worst) I don’t think Taylor swift is a racist but I do think she’s unauthentic and she uses her fans to push a narrative that’s she’s some “scared little girl” and the irony… She is Anti-Racist but her fans are the most racist of all they call Beyonce a Monkey and a Gorilla!!! Like what the hell? I’m not blaming her for other peoples actions but lady… your a 34 year old billionaire you have enough money and platforms to tell your Fanbase to stop! And now they’re harassing her ex?!? Like come on??? This is horrible behavior.

I'll start with my qualifications because I don't want to get into those arguments. I've been performing (aka singing and dancing) in musical theater for 10 years, playing violin and piano for 12 years (and won international and national-level competitions), compose and have sung in choral and gospel music on and off since I was in primary school. All of my following comments will be informed by my experiences in these styles of music.

1. The difference between lipsync and live performance. Now, I'm not one to say MR Removed has no merit, but remember that it can be edited to suit whatever the agenda of the creator is and is not extremely reliable anyways. The best way to tell if they're singing live is if you can hear "imperfections" in their singing. But guess what?
2. These imperfections seem to be hard for people to hear, but they're extremely noticeable to anyone with a trained ear for music. So I see these comments on obviously live performances saying "this is aautotune/lipsync" and I facepalm to death. It could be slightly out of tune or off time, making it evident to anyone that it's real, and people are calling that fake?
3. Now, there are idols who are extremely stable live and I'd say most of us could name an example. How do we tell if they're live? First, unless their agency has an issue with letting their artists sing live, we can usually trust that they're going to be singing live most of the time. Second, in live, these skilled singers will add some more grit, emotion, adlibs, a different spin to the timing, and more that show you they're live. No one sings the exact same thing the exact same way twice. This stuff is more high level, but again, paradoxically, it seems like we all know who the best singers are in most groups (although there are overrated and underrated singers).
4. Kpop groups have HUGE differences in difficulty of choreography for live singing. Of course, in my personal opinion, more choreography should center around who's supposed to be singing instead of trying to make everyone dance and sing at the same intensity. Kpop is pretty much the only industry that doesn't account for this (mostly beginning in 4th gen).
5. I feel like the moment 4th gen happened people started forgetting that kpop has always had roles: main dancer, main vocalist, main rapper, etc. I mean of course the companies are pushing that these groups have no positions, but we all know there are some idols better than others in the group at different things. So I think we should stop expecting every idol to be on the same level for everything. Every once in a while, there are groups where you could say every member is talented at everything, but it's time to stop expecting that from everyone. It's the exception, not the rule.
6. Nerves are a real thing. Everyone has bad days. So many kpop comments point to a group's "bad day" performance and say "this is what they actually sound like all the time," ignoring good performances or calling them fake.
7. If they're stable, they're doing better than a majority of performers in the world, not just in kpop. Not everyone is going to be showing off amazing vocal agility all the time and that's okay. Most kpop idols' songs are not built to be sung like Beyonce or Mariah Carey anyways, and like I mentioned in 4., these Western pop singers don't sing their hardest and dance their hardest at the same time.

TL;DR kpop fans call their hate "criticism" using non-musical metrics

It's time! Congratulations to our Banana Buddha for her absolute slayage of the season, the finale, and nearly the entirety of this poll!
Category Is: Ultimate Season 16 Favorite - 1,724 Votes

• 1st Place - Episode 3: Nymphia Wind, Call Me MotheFather Eleganza - 44.8% (773 votes)
  
• 2nd Place - Episode 15: Nymphia Wind, Top 3 Couture - 13.3% (230 votes)
  
• 3rd Place - Episode 8: Nymphia Wind, Dancing Queen - 12.8% (221 votes)
  
• 4th Place - Episode 7: Sapphira Cristal, I Can Buy Myself Flowers - 5.5% (94 votes)
  
• 5th Place - Episode 5: Nymphia Wind, Faster Pussycat, Wig! Wig! - 3.9% (67 votes)
  
• 6th Place - Episode 16: Nymphia Wind, Finale Eleganza (Top 3) - 2.6% (44 votes)
  
• 7th Place - Episode 10: Sapphira Cristal, True Colors - 2.1% (36 votes)
  
• 8th Place - Episode 9: Nymphia Wind, See You Next Wednesday - 1.8% (31 votes)
  
• 9th Place TIE - Episode 2: Nymphia Wind, Entrance Look & Episode 4: Plane Jane, Everything Every-Cher All At Once - 1.7% each (29 votes each)
  
• 11th Place - Episode 16: Nymphia Wind, Top 2/Crowning Couture - 1.6% (27 votes)
  
• 12th Place - Episode 11: Nymphia Wind, Flashback! DragCon 1980 - 1.5% (26 votes)
  
• 13th Place - Episode 12: Nymphia Wind, Chain Reaction - 1.2% (21 votes)
  
• 14th Place - Episode 3: Q, Mother Goose - 1.0% (17 votes)
  
• 15th Place - Episode 6: Q, In the Dollhouse - 0.9% (16 votes)
  
• 16th Place TIE - Episode 3: Q, Significant Mother & Episode 16: Plasma, Finale Eleganza (Returning Queens) - 0.8% each (13 votes each)
  
• 18th Place - Episode 16: Nymphia Wind, Top 3 Performance Look - 0.6% (10 votes)
  
• 19th Place - Episode 1: Q, RuVeal Yourself - 0.5% (9 votes)
  
• 20th Place TIE - Episode 1: Dawn, Entrance Look, Episode 2: Nymphia Wind, Made Ya Look!, & Episode 15: Mirage, LaLaPaRuZa Realness - 0.3% each (5 votes each)
  
• 23rd Place - Episode 14: Nymphia Wind, Fan-dango - 0.1% (2 votes)
  
• 24th Place - Episode 13: Nymphia Wind, Vegas Dancer Makeovers - 0.1% (1 vote)
  

Ultimate Favorite Lip-Sync: Season 16

• 1st Place - Episode 16: Nymphia Wind vs. Sapphira Cristal, "Padam Padam" - 32.8% (566 votes)
  
• 2nd Place - Episode 12: Morphine Love Dion vs. Dawn, "Body" - 18.3% (315 votes)
  
• 3rd Place - Episode 15: Morphine Love Dion vs. Megami, "Everybody Dance Now" - 14.4% (248 votes)
  
• 4th Place - Episode 11: Morphine Love Dion vs. Mhi'ya Iman Le'Paige, "Dim All the Lights" - 8.5% (146 votes)
  
• 5th Place - Episode 15: Morphine Love Dion vs. Mirage, "This Time I Know It's For Real" - 5.8% (100 votes)
  
• 6th Place - Episode 15: Morphine Love Dion vs. Geneva Karr, "Million Dollar Baby" - 4.2% (72 votes)
  
• 7th Place - Episode 15: Megami vs. Mhi'ya Iman Le'Paige, "We Got the Beat" - 4.1% (70 votes)
  
• 8th Place - Episode 9: Mhi'ya Iman Le'Paige vs. Plasma, "Bloody Mary (TikTok Version)" - 3.1% (53 votes)
  
• 9th Place - Episode 15: Mirage vs. Hershii Licquor-Jete, "Alone 2.0" - 1.9% (33 votes)
  
• 10th Place - Episode 8: Morphine Love Dion vs. Xunami Muse, "I Wanna Dance with Somebody" - 1.7% (29 votes)
  
• 11th Place - Episode 1: Sapphira Cristal vs. Q, "Break My Soul" - 1.2% (20 votes)
  
• 12th Place - Episode 2: Plane Jane vs. Geneva Karr, "Shower" - 0.9% (15 votes)
  
• 13th Place - Episode 15: Megami vs. Amanda Tori Meating, "Shoop Shoop Song" - 0.8% (14 votes)
  
• 14th Place - Episode 7: Mhi'ya Iman Le'Paige vs. Megami, "Flowers" - 0.6% (10 votes)
  
• 15th Place - Episode 10: Sapphira Cristal vs. Morphine Love Dion, "Made You Look" - 0.5% (8 votes)
  
• 16th Place - Episode 6: Mhi'ya Iman Le'Paige vs. Geneva Karr, "Control" - 0.3% (6 votes)
  
• 17th Place TIE - Episode 4: Geneva Karr vs. Mirage, "Dark Lady" & Episode 14: Plane Jane vs. Q, "Better Be Good to Me" - 0.3% each (5 votes each)
  
• 19th Place - Episode 13: Sapphira Cristal vs. Morphine Love Dion, "Miss Me More" - 0.2% (4 votes)
  
• 20th Place - Episode 15: Megami vs. Q, "What About" - 0.2% (3 votes)
  
• 21st Place TIE - Episode 3: Geneva Karr vs. Hershii Licquor-Jete, "Maybe You're the Problem" & Episode 15: Mhi'ya Iman Le'Paige vs. Plasma vs. Xunami Muse, "Milkshake" - 0.1% each (1 vote each)
  
• Last Place TIE - Episode 5: Q vs. Amanda Tori Meating, "Emergency" & Episode 15: Amanda Tori Meating vs. Dawn, "Damaged" - 0.0% each (0 votes each)
  

Ultimate Favorites Of All Time

Season	Ultimate Favorite Look	Ultimate Favorite Lip-Sync
Season 1	Nina Flowers' Drag on a Dime	Ongina vs. Bebe Zahara Benet, "Stronger"
Season 2	Raven's Top 3 Eleganza	Jujubee vs. Sahara Davenport, "Black Velvet"
Season 3	Manila Luzon's Pineapple Couture	Manila Luzon vs. Delta Work, "MacArthur Park"
Season 4	Sharon Needles' Post-Apocalyptic Couture	Dida Ritz vs. The Princess, "This Will Be (An Everlasting Love)"
All Stars 1	Raven's "Bad Girl Chic"	Jujubee vs. Raven, "Dancing On My Own"
Season 5	Detox's Black & White Finale Look	Coco Montrese vs. Alyssa Edwards, "Cold Hearted"
Season 6	Trinity K. Bonet's "Animal Kingdom Couture"	Adore Delano vs. Trinity K. Bonet, "Vibeology"
Season 7	Violet Chachki's Top 3 Crowning Look	Kennedy Davenport vs. Katya, "Roar"
Season 8	Kim Chi's "That's My Mama Realness"	Chi Chi DeVayne vs. Thorgy Thor, "And I Am Telling You I'm Not Going"
All Stars 2	Katya's "Pants! Pants I Say!" Look	Alyssa Edwards vs. Tatianna, "Shut Up And Drive"
Season 9	Sasha Velour's Crowning/Finale Lip-Sync Look	Sasha Velour vs. Shea Couleé, "So Emotional"
All Stars 3	Trixie Mattel's "Red For Filth" Look	BenDeLaCreme vs. Aja, "Anaconda"
Season 10	Aquaria's "Mermaid Fantasy" Look	Monét X Change vs. Dusty Ray Bottoms, "Pound The Alarm"
All Stars 4	Manila Luzon's Eleguence After Dark	Naomi Smalls vs. Gia Gunn, "Adrenaline"
Season 11	Yvie Oddly's Crowning/Finale Lip-Sync Look	Brooke Lynn Hytes vs. Yvie Oddly, "Sorry Not Sorry"
Season 1 (UK)	Divina De Campo's Day At The Races Eleganza	Blu Hydrangea vs. Cheryl Hole, "Call My Name"
Season 12	Crystal Methyd's Superfan Makeover	Gigi Goode vs. Widow Von'Du, "Starships"
All Stars 5	Jujubee's Top 3 All Stars Eleganza	India Ferrah vs. Yvie Oddly, "Livin’ la Vida Loca”
Season 1 (Canada)	Priyanka's Top 3 Coronation Eleganza	Priyanka vs. Kiara, "I Drove All Night"
Season 2 (UK)	Bimini Bon Boulash's PreHERstoric Eleganza	Tayce vs. Cherry Valentine, "Memory"
Season 13	Utica's Sleeping Bag Ball Eleganza	Denali vs. Kahmora Hall, "100% Pure Love"
Season 1 (España)	Hugáceo Crujiente's Best Drag Eleganza	Carmen Farala vs. Killer Queen vs. Sagittaria, "La gata bajo la lluvia"
Season 1 (Down Under)	Art Simone's Sea Sickening Eleganza	Maxi Shield vs. Etcetera Etcetera, "Absolutely Everybody"
All Stars 6	A'keria C. Davenport's "The Frill of It All" Eleganza	Trinity K. Bonet vs. Laganja Estranja, "Physical"
Season 3 (UK)	Krystal Versace's "Oh My Goddess" Couture	Vanity Milan vs. Scarlett Harlett, "Scandalous"
Season 14	Willow Pill's "Spring Has Sprung" Couture	Lady Camden vs. Daya Betty, "One Way or Another"
All Stars 7	Raja's "She Done Already Had Herses" Finale Eleganza	Monét X Change vs. Jinkx Monsoon, "The Night The Lights Went Out In Georgia" (Spoken Word)
Season 15	Anetra's Crystallized Eleganza	Anetra vs. Marcia Marcia Marcia, "Boss Bitch"
All Stars 8	Jimbo's "Net Gala" Couture	Aja vs. Kahanna Montrese, "Freakum Dress"
Season 16	Nymphia Wind's "Call Me MotheFather Eleganza"	Nymphia Wind vs. Sapphira Cristal, "Padam Padam"

Look forward to our All Stars 9 polls! :)

I will go first. there are so many to choose from, but I'll narrow it down to "couples" I haven't posted on here yet:
LEAST BELIEVABLE FAKE COUPLE
John Legend and Chrissy Teagan
Many beard couples at least have bff chemistry - but not these two!
MOST BELIEVABLE FAKE COUPLE
Beyonce and Jay z
(I honestly can't tell if it's bearding closeted PR stuff or if they're straight and it's a business type marriage but something is up and you can tell their teams originally put them together because it would be mutually advantageous as they both grew their careers)

So, I have a son that has a really normal, correctly spelled and rather common name. His name also happens to be “part” of a longer country name. Think Scott-Scotland.
Years ago, when I was in a particularly pissy mood because we don’t look very much alike (he is very fair) and I kept being asked if I was the au-pair (I was also late 20s but look younger I guess, and I have a slight foreign accent) I told an elderly lady that asked me what his name was short of that it was short for the country name (again, think Scott-Scotland). She was really taken aback that I would name my kid something so tragique, but I guess the lie gave me some perverse sense of satisfaction. I’m petty.
Anyway, unfortunately it stuck and, sometimes, if I am crossed with him I will call him by his “full, fake name”. Over the years a few more stupid monikers have joined the list. So, he is now “Scotland” Turbine Be’yonce McFly. For short, Scotty. Again, none of those but “Scott” are part of his name.
He finds it funny, we all call each other stoopid names at home so much that I sometimes forget his sister’s actual name.
Today, tho, he run away from me near a busy road while on his scooter. Since his name is short and doesn’t hold any full name power, I ended up shouting his full fake name once I caught up with him (minus the Beyonce part).
There were many people that turned their heads. So, in case I end up on here, know that not all tragique names in the wild are legit, just tragique parents that never developed their humour beyond preteen.

How we get Skylar on every album but not SZA, Beyonce or anyone else is beyond me. I really hope everything about that leak is fake.

taken from this tumblr post; https://spicysighs.tumblr.com/post/718136492512493568/matty-healy-taylor-swift-timeline
Matty Healy + Taylor Swift Timeline 11/7/13: Matty talking about Taylor liking the band and being asked to tour with her.
1/21/14: Matty talking about Taylor liking the band. xx
3/31/14: Matty talks about being asked to tour with Taylor and turning it down. "That was cool. It’s like, ‘We can’t, but that is really nice, thank you very much.”
11/4/14: Matty is pictured wearing a deluxe 1989 album cover tee at his concert in Milwaukee.
11/8/14: Taylor reblogs the picture on tumblr and says they are her favorite band.
11/9/14: Taylor likes these two pictures of Matty wearing the 1989 t-shirt.
11/9/14: Taylor liked this gif-set of Matty talking about whether he’s a dog or cat person.
11/19/14: Selena Gomez, Taylor and other friends went to The 1975 show in LA. Video of them singing along to ‘The City.’
11/19/14: Taylor & Matty making a video for a fan. (Jamie’s daughter Kitty)
11/22/14: Matty follows Taylor on Twitter.
11/23/14: Taylor was pictured wearing a The 1975 band shirt.
11/23/14: Taylor likes these two posts of them wearing each others merch.
11/24/14: Matty dedicates ‘Robbers’ to Taylor. Supposedly he’s done this multiple times. xx
11/25/14: Taylor likes these Tumblr posts. And this picture of Matty.
11/26/14: Taylor likes this Tumblr post.
11/26/14: Matty likes Taylor’s post on Instagram.
11/26/14: Matty wearing the 1989 t-shirt again.
11/26/14: Matty talking about meeting Taylor “I met Taylor Swift, that was really nice.” and when asked about possibly dating “I mean bloody hell, what am I going to do? Go out with Taylor Swift? She’s a sensation, I wouldn’t say no.”
11/28/14: Taylor is rumored to have attended The 1975 show in Chattanooga, TN.
11/29/14: Taylor likes this Tumblr post.
11/29/14: Matty signed this Polaroid for a fan, and the fan talking about the interaction.
11/29/14: Matty says he can’t kiss a fan because he’s taken.
12/2/14: Matty’s mom retweets this.
12/2/14: Matty likes Taylor’s Instagram post.
12/3/14: Matty about Taylor “Well, she’s amazing. She’s an amazing role model. And not only is she an incredible songwriter, she’s an incredible pop songwriter, which I think is even harder. I can’t speak highly enough about Taylor Swift.”
12/4/14: Taylor, Martha, Karlie and others went to The 1975 show in NYC. Where Matty dedicated ‘fallingforyou’ to her. Rumored that Matty missed the after-party and spent the night with Taylor. xx
12/5/14: Taylor likes this Tumblr post about Matty singing ‘fallingforyou’ to her.
12/5/14: Matty’s tweet in response to articles about him and Taylor getting his name wrong.
12/6/14: Matty has a breakdown on stage in Boston, MA. In 2015 talking about the incident he says “There was girl stuff. There was family stuff. There was financial stuff. There was drug stuff.”
12/6/14: Matty talking about a fan saying “I love you” to him. “What did I say to the poor fucking girl? ‘You don’t have the right to love me. You don’t know me. I love you but you don’t get to love me.’ Jesus. Can you imagine your favorite band shouting that at you? What a dickhead. What a horrible thing to say to a kid who fucking does love me.”
12/9/14: Matty at a show in NY “I was sad the other day as someone told me they loved me. And I said ‘No, you don’t. Not really.’ And today I told someone I loved them. And they said ‘No, you don’t.’ And it fucking sucks to hear that. Especially when you mean it. Don’t do that to someone. Don’t do what I did.”
12/14/14: Matty posts this on Instagram.
12/30/14: Matty deletes this Instagram post.
1/16/15: Matty denies dating rumors. Admits they exchanged numbers but “That didn’t really happen as much as it’d be amazing for me if it did, unfortunately it didn’t.”
2/25/15: They hangout at the BRIT Awards afterparty. (This weekend is when she met Calvin and they started dating)
2015: Matty & Halsey date and breakup.
11/15/15: Matty talks about Taylor in an interview “The things that surround her are like Barack Obama. I fell for her a little bit, but everyone falls for Taylor Swift” “The day after she’d been to a show of ours, someone sent me a screenshot of E! News with the headline ‘Who is Matt Healy?’ That freaked me out. I’m not ready to indulge in that world and I’m not ready to be judged by that world.”
12/8/15: Matty talks about reaching out to Taylor to have her in his music video.
Sometime in 2015: Matty & Gabriella Brooks start dating.
2/1/16: Matty talking about Taylor “She was a fan of the band and we just became friends, and we related to each other over how mental our lives were. But when you’re with people like Taylor, there are a million people flying around you the whole time, and this security guard is talking to that guy, and this guy is the new manager. I didn’t like the pace of it, because it makes me confused and I feel like I’m going to miss something. And being perceptive is one of the abilities that I like to think that I have.“
3/17/16: Matt Healy has suggested that dating Taylor Swift would have been “emasculating” for him because of her huge global fame.
3/18/16: Journalist who interviewed him writes an op-ed saying his words were misconstrued and “I saw an intelligent and liberal man wrestling with our culture’s gender roles.”
3/19/16: He apologizes for said comments and calls Taylor “One of the most gracious, hard working, creatively gifted, and beautiful women that I have had the pleasure to meet.”
6/1/16: Taylor & Calvin Harris breakup.
6/15/16: Taylor starts dating Tom Hiddleston.
8/17/16: Matty says he has Taylor’s number but “she’s probably changed her number by now.” And jokes “I keep texting her.”
8/30/16: Matty talks about Taylor on the BBCR1’s Breakfast Show. They joke about Taylor doing jury duty.
9/6/16: Taylor & Tom Hiddleston breakup.
October 2016: Taylor & Joe Alwyn start dating.
10/27/16: Matty about Taylor in Rolling Stone “She came to our show, and you would have thought that Barack Obama had come out. I don’t know another person on the planet that would elicit that kind of reaction.”
11/11/16: Matty again denies he dated Taylor and says “She came to a show and we hung out. We fancied each other, but then we couldn’t have it go any further, because it would be like going out with Barack Obama.”
11/20/17: Podcast talking about Taylor & Matty.
12/3/18: Matty talking about his journal “It’s mainly stories that I write about my dreams of being in love with other popstars.”
12/4/18: Matty retweets a picture of Taylor.
8/28/19: Matty & Gabriella Brooks breakup.
9/23/19: Mentions wanting to produce an album for Taylor in an interview (at 13:48 & 32:00) “Taylor, if you ever want someone to help you set up the mics for your little acoustic record, just so you know, I’m there.”
9/23/19: Matty retweets and tags Taylor in a post quoting him saying he wants to produce an album for Taylor.
9/24/19: Matty tweets “Taylor Swift. With an acoustic guitar. Doing her ‘Nebraska’. Doing her ‘Blue’. Kill me.”
January 2020: Matty & FKA Twigs start dating.
2/12/20: Both attend the NME awards and hug. Beabadoobee (who Taylor is talking to in the video) about meeting Taylor that day “Taylor’s so ethereal, So badass, I was like ‘Holy shit!’ She was walking towards me and I’m like, ‘She’s going to Matty [The 1975] not me.’ And then she comes up to me and I’m like… I vomited in my mouth. I couldn’t believe it.”
2/20/20: Matty mentions seeing Taylor and wanting to work with her in an interview with Zane Lowe. “She was just stood behind me. I mean, I haven’t seen Taylor in years so it was actually a really nice room. But it, unfortunately, wasn’t the time for me to pitch my post-rock Joni Mitchell project.”
10/22/20: Deuxmoi posts these.
2021: Matty starts working with Jack Antonoff on The 1975′s upcoming album.
November 2021: Taylor and Jack Antonoff start working on “Midnights.”
6/7/22: Matty & FKA Twigs breakup.
8/9/22: Matty Healy shares Taylor Swift’s reaction to The 1975’s new album, with her saying “it’s so funny.”
9/3/22: Matty says there will be no collab on Midnights. “I would love that! But unfortunately FAKE NEWS :(”
10/7/22: Matty tweets “You guys actually thought Taylor Swift was gonna have me on her album”
10/11/22: Matty on working with Taylor “Oh we’re not. We’d love to. Love to work with Taylor Swift. Love Taylor Swift, think she’s one of the best songwriters, but yeah, no we haven’t done that. We’d love to though.”
10/11/22: The 1975 discuss covering ‘Lover’ for the BBC live lounge.
10/12/22: Matty briefly mentions Taylor in a Zane Lowe interview (45:53).
10/18/22: Matty briefly mentions Taylor in a podcast (1:22:40) when talking about who they would like to see on the podcast. Interestingly enough her name seems to be cut from the video version of the podcast.
10/23/22: Matty posted on his Instagram to stream Midnights.
10/26/22: Matty posted he was listening to ‘Hey Stephen TV’ on his Instagram story
11/27/22: Matty said he worked on Midnights with Taylor but their versions didn’t make the cut (4:52). “We actually worked a bit on that, but then the version of it never came out.” “It was for reasons not to be criticized.”
12/21/22: Matty said ‘Chocolate‘ reminds him of Taylor “Tumblr, Doc Martens, Taylor Swift, the 1975”
‘Question…?’ Played in The 1975 pre-show playlist. (Don’t have dates because it happened multiple times)
1/12/23: Matty & Taylor before The 1975 show.
1/12/23: Taylor does a surprise performance at The 1975 show in London. Deuxmoi later claims they stayed up until 4 am talking (later confirmed in his profile with The New Yorker.)
1/12/23: Matty “I’m not kissing anybody in front of Taylor Swift, have some respect. in front of the queen? not happening“
2/2/23: Matty briefly mentions Taylor and the Ticketmaster situation (38:06)
February: Allegedly spent several days at a Los Angeles recording studio together.
3/15/23: Matty seen with Ana Salazar.
3/17/23: First show of The Eras Tour
3/22/23: Puff-piece comes out stating Joe and Taylor are ‘great together’ and ‘super supportive of her career’ and will be travelling to her ‘when he can’.
‘About You’ plays at the same time as the Lover MV has been playing on The Eras Tour pre-show playlist. (Don’t have dates because it happened multiple times)
3/29/23: Matty’s ex says “Things were going well until around March 29th then, out of the blue, he stopped replying to my messages and calls.”
3/31/23: Taylor changes The Eras Tour setlist from ‘Invisible String’ to ‘The 1’
4/7/23: Matty follows Taylor on Instagram.
4/7/23: Matty likes Taylor’s Instagram post.
4/8/23: Matty’s birthday.
4/8/23: It’s announced Taylor and Joe have broken up.
4/8/23: Matty talking about love and how happy he is.
4/10/23: Matty deactivates his social media accounts.
4/10/23: Matty on why he deactivated “Everything happens in eras. The 1975 is a very eras band. And I think that the era of me being a fucking asshole is gonna come to an end.” and “I perform all the time and it’s my job and I love doing this, but I can’t perform off the stage any more as I just want to be a bloke.”
4/10/23: Matty says “Hey, I love you.” during ‘About You’.
4/10/23: Matty mouths “You know who you are.” and points during ‘About You’.
4/11/23: Matty “A call for something sincere and direct. That’s what we’re all looking for. That’s what I’m looking for. Maybe I’ve found it.. I’m feeling quite happy.”
4/13/23: Deuxmoi says she got a tip that Matty & Taylor are dating. (19:16)
4/14/23: Matty cheering during ‘Me & You Together.’
4/14/23: Matty “Romance is nice when it works, this next song worked.” ‘fallingforyou’ starts playing “Oh it’s a different song, this song did not work.”
4/14/23: Before ‘About You’ “Ok, this is the one that worked.”
4/14/23: Matty mouthing “I love you” during ‘About You’ and saying “Fuck yeah, I win!” after it ends.
4/16/23: Matty’s “Yeah you will!” during ‘Happiness’ after the line, “I’m never gonna love again.”
4/19/23: Matty says “It takes bit to get here but its worth it” and “true story” before playing ‘Me & You Together.’
4/21/23: Matty plays a cover of ‘The Best of Me’ by The Starting Line. Take note of the lyrics.
4/24/23: Matty spoke about how he sees people listening to ‘She’s American’ in three places: Manchester, Tokyo and Pennsylvania “that’s a whole other thing don’t worry about that.”
5/3/23: The Sun reports Matty and Taylor are dating and will go public with their romance at her shows in Nashville.
5/3/23: Matty introducing ‘Me and You Together song’, saying “I’ve got something real to tell you guys!”
5/3/23: Matty mouths “This is about you, you know who you are. I love you.” while playing ‘About You.’
5/3/23: Matty does a cover of ‘The Best of Me’ by The Starting Line again.
5/4/23: Matty introducing ‘Me and You Together song’, saying “So I’ve been trying to tell you guys” and “That’s right.”
5/4/23: Before playing ‘About You’ Matty mouths "This is why I’m happy. Who is it about? Who am I talking to?”
5/4/23: Matty is seen mouthing the words “I love you” before writing the letter T on the camera lens.
5/4/23: Matty saying “she sure is” before playing ‘She’s American.’
5/4/23: Matty flies from Manila to Nashville. (Which is around a 20hr flight)
5/5/23: Matty at Taylor’s concert. Nashville night 1.
5/5/23: Taylor mouths “This is about you, you know who you are. I love you.” during ‘cardigan.’
5/6/23: Matty grabbing coffee accompanied by Taylors bodyguard after leaving Taylors condo.
5/6/23: Matty at Nashville night 2. xx
5/6/23: Matty & Taylor pictured arriving at Taylor’s condo together.
5/7/23: Matty at Nashville night 3.
5/11/23: Matty and Taylor spotted on a date with Jack Antonoff in NYC. More pictures here.
5/12/23: Matty at Philly night 1.
5/13/23: Matty at Philly night 2.
5/13/23: Taylor performs ‘This Love’ with no introduction.
5/14/23: Taylor plays a request of “Hey Stephen”, but doesn’t say who requested it.
5/14/23: Matty pictured at the VIP tent at The Eras Tour Philly night 3
5/15/23: Matty and Taylor pictured leaving a party at Electric Studios in NYC.
5/18/23: Article comes out saying Joe is ‘distraught and slighted’ over Taylor & Matty dating, saying he ‘trusted’ Taylor when she said they were just friends.
5/18/23 Matty entering Taylor’s NYC Apartment.
5/20/23: Matty’s ex talks about Matty and Taylor.
5/20/23: Taylor’s speech before playing ‘Question…?’ in Foxborough, MA. “I want you all to know that I’ve never been this happy before in my life. It’s not just with the tour, I just sort of feel like my life finally feels like it makes sense. And so I thought I’d play this song, which brings me a lot of happy memories.”
5/20/23: Taylor plays ‘Question…?’ on night 2 in Foxborough, MA.
5/22/23: Matty dropping Taylor off at Electric Lady Studios.
5/24/23: Taylor and Matty leaving the Electric Lady Studios separately.
5/27/23: The Sun reports Matty and Taylor are moving in together.
5/29/23: Matty’s profile with The New Yorker comes out which includes multiple mentions of Taylor.
5/29/23: From The New Yorker “Healy found it annoying that, at a certain level of fame, celebrities can cultivate liberal auras while avoiding the risk of taking real political stands. (Swift, I thought, but didn’t say, seemed to be excepted from his critique.)”
5/29/23: From The New Yorker about Taylor & Matty dating “ Neither of their representatives would comment on the record, but I kept getting texts from people who knew them, and who insisted: this time, it’s real.”
6/5/23: Matty & Taylor reportedly break up.
6/6/23: People releases an article saying “There is no drama, and who knows what could happen again.” and "Taylor and Matty still care for one another but they are in the middle of world tours so both are incredibly busy. They’ve been friends for years and are still friends.”
6/6/23: While discussing Taylor on his podcast (21:06) Zach Sang says “I’m like kind of friends with Selena Gomez. We’ve known each other for a very long time and we share a lot of close friends. And from what I heard like in the aura around Selena, Taylor was talking about Matty Healy like he was the one."
6/11/23: Matty reactivates his Instagram.
6/11/23: Matty “You know what’s nice, playing songs in context“ before ‘Me and You Together song’
7/1/23: Matty mentions Taylor "I don’t wanna use this thing [the catwalk], it feels very democratic, it feels very… I mean Beyonce of course, Taylor, Machine Gun Kelly, whoever it may be… I don’t like it, it makes me feel exposed.”
7/5/23: The Sun claims Matty & Taylor are back together and “want to make it work at all costs.”
7/5/23: People declines claims that they are together.
7/18/23: Matty briefly mentions Taylor “I speak about this a lot, the Tumblr times, the simpler days, the golden days. When it was just us and Taylor and Lana and Arctic Monkeys.”
7/22/23: Taylor removes ‘About You’ from The Eras Tour pre-show playlist.
8/7/23: Matty is seen with Meredith Mickelson at an airport in Hawaii.
August 2023: Taylor starts dating Travis Kelce.
September 2023: Matty starts dating Gabbriette.
December 2023: Multiple people receive miss prints of “1989 (Taylor’s Version)” which appears to show the song “Slut” originally featured The 1975.
4/19/24: Taylor releases her new album “The Tortured Poets Department” where many songs are believed to be about Taylor and Matty’s previous relationship.

Full disclosure: I'm not a big sports guy myself.
I mean, it doesn't even matter - this is a music-related subreddit, and what I'm getting at is that I am more interested in what the Olympics, the World Cup, the Super Bowl etc have to offer from the musical and cultural standpoint. The music and the songs from those events are sometimes remembered more fondly that the actual sports competitions - from 'Waka Waka', 'Wavin' Flag' and 'The Cup of Life' to pretty much every year's Super Bowl - the list goes on.
We are just 86 days away from the most important sports event on the planet that'll take place in one of the world's biggest cultural capitals. In terms of how well the host country's musical traditions can be displayed during the opening and closing ceremonies, the 2012 London Olympics have set the benchmark very high, so much so that, in my opinion, the following two installments were rather disappointing, to say the least. I'm personally hoping that the Paris Olympics could at least try to recapture the brilliance of the 2012 Games in the musical department, and thankfully, France is a country with incredibly rich music traditions that are just waiting to be showcased to the world audience and introduce new generations of people to French music.
Together with news articles gushing over international superstars ("OMG is Beyonce playing at the 2024 Games? "Dolly Parton recorded a Queen cover for the Olympics", "Coldplay at the Olympics???" yada yada) that could potentially perform at the opening ceremony, there's also a Spotify playlist suspiciously subtitled "The Official Playlist of Paris 2024". Here's hoping that the playlist is actually fake (474 likes, 15 followers) because it mostly consists of your typical post-globalist schlock that one, for once, hopes not to hear outside of your Top 40 radio rotation/Spotify daily payola mix. From the White Stripes and Marshmello (groan) to Dua Lipa and Jack Harlow (triple groan) sprinkled with a teeny tiny selection of French songs, is this really the best they've got?
Anyway, here it is, LTM, the obligatory tl;dr. What should we expect from the music that will be featured in the 2024 Paris Olympics? What genres, artists and songs best showcase France's rich music traditions and absolutely deserve to be highlighted?
​

Events are listed by the day. Events that happen every week appear first, one time stuff after that. If you have anything you’d like people to know about, comment here or message me and I’ll add it in. If you’d like further info about any of the events, look it up! I usually don’t have any extra to add.
Large Scale, Ongoing, and Multi-Day Events

• Word of the South! Word of [South], a festival of literature and music, is a unique blend of writers and musicians and an exploration of the relationship between the two disciplines. Beginning with our first festival in 2015, the festival showcases authors who write about music, musicians who also are authors, authors and musicians trading places, and everything in between. We’re especially proud of our “mu-aushups”: authors and musicians appearing together (some of whom have never met), as well as our cookbook authors, kids programming and musical performances of every genre--we’ve got gospel and HipHop, pop and bluegrass, jazz and country, Americana and R&B. Bring the whole family, and come see what’s down South! Saturday and Sunday, mostly free. Check the schedule here, it’s usually amazing: https://wordofsouthfestival.com/
  
• American Vintage Markets at the N FL Fairgrounds. Inspired by the love of vintage and handmade, American Vintage Markets is pleased to bring together a wide array of carefully curated vendors who will showcase their best re-cycled, re-purposed, handcrafted, and re-imagined treasures. A true delight for your pickin' pleasure! Sat and Sun, 9am-4pm, $8
  
• Thomasville Rose Show and Festival. Held in historic Downtown Thomasville, the Rose Show and Festival has been a southwest Georgia tradition for over 100 years. Featuring several flower shows, a car and truck show, a rose parade, an artisan market, and more, you don't want to miss this celebration. Events Friday and Saturday. See the site for details: https://thomasvillega.com/attractions/events/thomasville-rose-show-and-festival
  
• Tallahassee Indie Bookstore Crawl. Celebrate Independent Bookstore Day by supporting all of Tallahassee's indie bookstores with an all-weekend bookstore crawl! Get your punch-card signed at all 6 stores and enter to win some awesome prizes. (Bookstore hours vary) Bookstores include: Common Ground Books, Fat Cat Books, Cosmic Cat Comics, Lake of Fire Books, Fallout Comics, My Favorite Books, Midtown Reader. Saturday and Sunday
  

Local Running, Walking, and Biking Info: https://troubleafoot.blogspot.com/
Guided Paddling Outings all around the area: https://www.facebook.com/hsmithoutdoors
Tallahassee Film Society Showings: https://www.tallahasseefilms.com/tickets/
Book Clubs for all tastes: https://www.facebook.com/midtownreadeevents
Live Theater:

• Making Light Productions: https://www.makinglightproductions.org/
  
• Theatre Tallahassee: https://theatretallahassee.org/
  
• Mickee Faust Club: https://www.mickeefaust.com/
  
• Monticello Opera House: https://www.monticellooperahouse.org/
  
• FSU School of Theatre: https://theatre.fsu.edu/productions/
  
• Young Actors Theatre: https://www.youngactorstheatre.com/
  
• Quincy Music Theatre: https://quincymusictheatre.com/
  
• Tallahassee Hispanic Theater: https://tallahasseehispanictheater.wordpress.com/
  

OutdooFarmer’s Markets:

• Lake Ella Grower's Market: Wednesday and Saturday, 11am-2pm. You can always find organic vendors, and foragers: The Holistic Cannabis Community, Artzi Farms, Hickory Nut Gifts, and others. Including Pita Queen! Farmer's Market Nutrition Program Coupons gladly accepted!
  
• Tallahassee Downtown Market: Saturdays, 10am-2pm, Park Ave Parks. Vendors display their arts and fine crafts, jewelry, handmade soap, pottery, Fresh from Florida produce, hand-raised beef and pork, fresh baked bread, jams and jellies, and honey. Live music from different local musicians every Saturday.
  
• Frenchtown Heritage Market: 524 N MLK Jr Blvd. Third Saturday of the month 10am to 2pm. Come grow community and support your local farmers and makers, while you get your groceries for the week! Don’t forget! We match SNAP/EBT, so you DOUBLE your money to go towards locally grown fresh fruits and vegetables! If the guy with the pineapple is there, get it. This is currently only happening on the third Saturday of the month for the next few months while road work is completed.
  
• Tallahassee Farmers Market: 2904 Kerry Forest Pkwy, Saturdays, 8am to Noon. Come see us at Tallahassee's longest-running farmers market! We are a year-round market, featuring local farms and vendors that provide the best seasonal produce, meats, baked goods, and more. We welcome you and your whole family (leashed pets included) to come out and meet your local farmers! Ample parking is available between our lot and the shopping center lot next door (by Red Elephant). Come early for the best selection.
  

THURSDAY, 4/25

• The Hub at Feather Oaks: Bingo. 6pm
  
• Dreamland BBQ: Weekly Open Blues Jam. If you'd like to sing, please bring your own mic. 6pm
  
• Honest Living Vape: Chess-Master Thursdays . Beginners and experts, join us every Thursday from 6-9 for Chess-Master Thursdays. All ages. Bring your board or play ours! Tournaments coming soon! 6pm
  
• Oyster City Brewing Co: Open Mic Night! Join us on Thursdays from 6:30-9:30 PM for Open Mic Night hosted by the incredible Mike Ingram of The Brown Goose! This is your chance to show off your skills! Whether you're a musician, poet, comedian, or have a hidden talent, we can't wait to see what you bring to the stage. 6:30pm
  
• Lake Tribe: Trivia. 7pm
  
• Takko Market Square: Bingo Night. 7pm
  
• The Getaway Grille and Bar: Karaoke with Jared Walker. 7pm
  
• Amicus Brewing: Trivia. 7pm
  
• Smitty's Taphouse: Trivia Lab Thursdays. Teams of 6 or fewer players can compete for $30 / $20 / $10 Prizes + The Golden MacGuffin prize table! New format! Interactive smartphone answering for your comfort and safety! 6 Fun Rounds - 42 Total Questions. 7:30pm
  
• Cap City Video Lounge: "Manos" The Hands of Fate & The Touch of Satan! MST3K Thursday. Join us Thursday as we climb aboard The Satellite of Love along with Joel, Tom Servo and CROOOOW as they crack wise over two very bizarre treks into the occult with the legendary episodes "MANOS" THE HANDS OF FATE followed by THE TOUCH OF SATAN! 7:30pm/free but donations encouraged
  
• Studio D: Bachata Fever. We always have a bachata workshop at 8 pm before Bachata Fever. We dance afterwards to the sounds of DJ Bacharod. The class is at 8 pm and Bachata Fever will start at 930 pm. Many times people are learning in class and may feel uncomfortable social dancing while they are still learning moves. We have a welcoming environment so stay and have fun and dance with everyone. That is how we learn. 8pm/Class $5/Bachata Fever $5.
  
• The Sound Bar: Comedy Night. 8pm
  
• Finnegans Wake: Open Mic. 8:30pm
  
• Brass Tap in Midtown: Karaoke with DJ Rah. 9pm
  
• 926: Karaoke. 9pm
  
• Bird’s: Karaoke with Nathan. 9pm
  

• Blue Tavern: Rachel’s Reading Club – sight reading with Rachel Hillman. 5pm
  
• Oyster City Brewing: Ben Baggett. 6pm
  
• Club Downunder: CDU x TMIC Presents: Local Covers featuring Kanise, On The Edge, Chef Will & Tonight’s Special, Hey Cheetah, No Parts, and Mutual Friends covering the music of Beyonce, The Backseat Lovers, Kendrick Lamar, Bruno Mars + Silk Sonic, Paramore, and Nirvana. 6:30pm
  
• Retrofit Records: Justice “Hyperdrama” Album Listening Event. 7pm
  
• The Bark: Tearman, Sour, and Ellen Fish. 8pm
  
• The Sound Bar: Atala Quartet. 8pm
  
• Houe of Music: Selwyn Birchwood. 8pm
  
• Blue Tavern: Movie Night: screening of Robert Stone’s “Radio Bikini”. 8pm
  

FRIDAY, 4/26

• Blue Tavern: Happy Hour with Steve Malono. 5pm
  
• Lake Tribe Brewing: Flannel Fridays with Live Music. 6pm
  
• Hobbit West: Friday Night Dart Tournament. Anyone can Enter! Sign ups at 7:30, Darts fly at 8:00/$10 entry fee
  
• Ouzts Too: Karaoke with DJ Nathan. Best karaoke DJ in town. 8pm
  
• Just One More: Karaoke with DJ Rah. 9pm-11pm/21+
  
• 926: The Hot Friday Night Party and Drag Show. 9pm/$5/18+
  

• Bleu Tavern: Two Clever. 5pm
  
• The Getaway Grille and Bar: Pineapple Tuesday. 6pm
  
• Lake Tribe: Deja Blu. 6pm
  
• Goodwood: Pig & Pearl: Preservation on the Halfshell. On April 26, embrace the power of preservation with Southern food traditions as Goodwood and presenting sponsor Prime Meridian Bank host a night of live music and culinary traditions. Enjoy Goodwood's beautiful historic backdrop in the heart of Tallahassee, while dining and sipping on a specialty cocktail (created uniquely for this event and poured by local celebrity bartenders) during this night to remember. Inspired by the people whose lives shaped the story of the Red Hills region, Pig & Pearl: Preservation on the Halfshell is a fundraising benefit that supports Goodwood Museum & Gardens in its pursuit of keeping a piece of Tallahassee’s history alive and accessible to all people. Alongside the pork, oysters (fried and on the half shell), salmon, and southern sides, live music from natural storyteller and one-woman band Anna Wescoat. Wescoat, who is the 2023 Best of Tallahassee performer, will bring her classic folk and country sound to this year's Pig & Pearl. Meanwhile, a free photo booth will capture snapshots of the night, allowing each guest to bring home special memories with friends and loved ones. The Carriage House at Goodwood Museum & Gardens will come alive with tradition, preservation, and community as friends (old and new) gather for a night to remember. 6pm/$125
  
• Cascades: Leon County and Word of South Present: The Flaming Lips performing “Yoshimi Battles the Pink Robots” in full + a second set of additional songs. 6pm
  
• Southwood Golf Club: Brett Wellman and the Stone Cold Blues Band. 6:30pm
  
• The Sound Bar: 323 Trio. 7pm
  
• Oyster City Brewing: Double Play. 7pm
  
• The Bark: Engineers Without Borders Fundraiser Show featuring The Relish Girls, Bench Warmer, Satin, and Sofia Camille. 8pm
  
• Blue Tavern: Grateful Dead Night featuring Lee C. Payton and Hot Tamale. 8pm
  
• Fire Bettys: Disco Never Died Dance Party. 9pm/21+/free
  

SATURDAY, 4/27

• Brinkley Glen Park: Invasive Plant Removal. Join Master Gardener Volunteers at this weekly invasive plant removal event. This is a great way to learn to ID our invasive plant species and how to remove them. We recommend wearing long pants and sleeves, closed-toed shoes, gloves, a hat and mosquito spray. Bring gardening tools such as hand clippers, loppers, trowels, etc. if you have them. We are removing coral ardisia bushes and berries, nandina, tung trees, Tradescantia flumenensis, cat's claw vine, winged yam, Japanese climbing fern, skunkvine and more. Directions: The best way to get there is to take Meridian Rd to Waverly Rd, go to the next intersection and turn left onto Abbotsford Way, then turn left at the next road called Woodside Dr. At the stop sign turn left onto Lothian. Lothian ends in a cul-de-sac and there is a sign that says Brinkley Glen Park. 8:30am-11:30am
  
• Gamescape: Saturday Gaming. Gamescape has relocated from Railroad Square to the Huntington Oaks Plaza (Suite 302, next to the Library) at N Monroe St and Fred George Rd. Open gaming tables are available. Noon-6pm
  
• Potbellys: 7th Annual FAKE St. Patrick's Day Party. 4pm
  
• Duke’s and Dottie’s: Line Dancing Plus Lessons. 7pm/21+
  
• Bird’s Oyster Shack: Laughterday Night Fever. * Join us every Saturday at Bird's Aphrodisiac Oyster Shack for a free comedy show!* 8:30pm
  
• 926: Latin Night. Dance to the irresistible beats of Zeus and prepare to be dazzled by a spectacular drag show at midnight. It's more than a party, it's an experience. 9:30pm/$10 21+, $15 under 21
  

• Native Nurseries: Together We Bloom: Annual Floral Arrangement Contest Open To All. There is no cost or registration required; we encourage all ages to make arrangements. Our one rule is to use only native plants. Drop off arrangements at the nursery that Saturday morning by 9:30 a.m. and people will have until 4:00 p.m. to vote on the best arrangement. The first place prize is a $25 gift certificate to Native Nurseries, along with mystery prizes for second and third places. The winners of our contest will be contacted the following Tuesday. There are no parameters regarding shape, size, or vessel. Any nursery visitor can cast their vote in the ballot box. 9:30am
  
• Carrabelle: 2024 Carrabelle Riverfront Festival. This year, the Carrabelle Chamber is thrilled to introduce the ADVENTURE FAMILY CIRCUS who will be thrilling festival goers with three exhilarating aerial circus shows. Adventure Family Circus is an internationally touring small family circus show. They are an AERIAL & ACROBATIC SHOW with acts including high flying aerial and acrobatic acts, aerial rope, aerial silks, aerial lyra, mini trampoline, juggling and comedy. It's a spectacle the whole family will enjoy! Also joining the Carrabelle Riverfront Festival will be REDEMPTIVE LOVE FARM & RESCUE bringing their PETTING ZOO and FEEDING STATION. Adults and children alike love to enter and get hands-on with the sweet farm pets including chickens, ducks, bunnies, and young goats. At the feeding station, guests can also meet which will include animals like a llama, mini-donkey, mini-cow, goat, alpaca, or emu! It's a hands-on experience that both children and adults will cherish. The festival will also feature the always popular activities for the kids, including children’s MINI-TRAIN RIDES and a BOUNCY HOUSE. These familiar favorites add additional fun to the already entertaining atmosphere. Feet will be tapping to the upbeat favorites from across the decades with talented musicians including JOHN JEREMIAH plus KEVIN ANDREW and the ROCKULLA PERFORMERS. Guests will also be delighted by wonderful dance performances of the FORGOTTEN COAST DANCING WITCHES. The entertainment doesn’t end there as there will also be fun music by DJ BEANIE BABY throughout the day. And of course the festival will feature the family-friendly EXHIBITOR EXPO on AVENUE B, hosted by the Carrabelle History Museum, with informative exhibits like a WWII military vehicle, the fire-wise cabin, shark jaws, animal skulls, and a display of Florida’s pioneer days. A wild animal ambassador, Moonlight, the Great Horned Owl will also be visiting from a local rescue. In addition Avenue B will host the Pet & People Cooling Station. Visitors can browse tons of festival VENDORS, EXHIBITORS, and booths with interesting arts and craft items, delicious food, and local displays as well as explore the local shops, museums, and restaurants for even more choices. There will be lots of yummy food to choose from like shrimp, conch fritters, Indian food, BBQ, plus festival treats like kettle corn, funnel cakes and shaved ice. 10am-6pm
  
• Civic Center: Hot Wheels Monster Trucks Live Glow Party. Bringing fans' favorite Hot Wheels Monster Trucks to life including Mega Wrex, Tiger Shark, Demo Derby, Bone Shaker, Bigfoot, Gunkster, and introducing the brand new HW 5-Alarm, the firetruck hero of Hot Wheels Monster Trucks! The Glow Party production features a laser light show, spectacular theatrical effects, dance parties, and Hot Wheels toy giveaways. Fans can also witness a special appearance from a transforming robot, plus the high-flyers of Hot Wheels Monster Trucks Live Freestyle Motocross Team. Special kids pricing is available for all shows providing a great value for the whole family! 12:30pm
  
• The Getaway Grille and Bar: Nighshift. 6pm
  
• Blue Tavern: Saylor Dollar Band. 7pm
  
• The Wine House on Market Street: Jazz Night with Some Goodfellas and Friends! 7pm
  
• Oyster City Brewing: Jimmy Brazen Band. 7pm
  
• TNL Performing Arts Center: SANKOFA Concert "Legends of Funk Jazz and Soul". We are featuring and celebrating the music of local legends and educators who have contributed to the arts of music and education here in Tallahassee and around the world. These artists represent the highest standard and love for the art of music, dedicating their lives to enriching the lives of others through the arts, education and culture. The Sankofa Concert is an educational but entertaining event that showcases and educates the community about the various forms of musical and artistic expressions performed by musicians and singers of the African Diaspora. Appearing on stage at the 5th Sankofa Concert will be 2x Grammy Award winner singesongwriter Kendra Foster; singesongwriter Cody ChesnuTT; Caribbean Gospel Music Award winners Ilismo & Lili Forbes; highly acclaimed singer, songwriter, and producer Anthony Williams; and Drummer on the Move, Marlon Williams. Also appearing will be Keith Rodgers, Avek La’Mou, Jordan Roberts, Alexander Williams, Shanice Richards, Nia Sissle and TheSoulCollectiveLive. Featured musicians are Joel Johnson, Sam Johnson, Joshua Rivers, Jordan Green, Steve Fryson, Michelle Waller, and many more. 7pm
  
• Square Mug Café at The Plant: Food Not Bombs Benefit Show featuring River City Riot, Gangs of Paris, Killer Choice, High Speed Suicide, Sp33d Runn3r, and Warmonger. 7pm
  
• Monk House (409 Murat Street): Fated to Burn, Psycho Tropical, Durty Suns. 7:30pm/$7
  
• The Sound Bar: Seminole Send Off with Weatherboys, Small Talk, and Abigail Jennings. 7:30pm/$10
  
• Capital City Tattooz: CCT Afterdark Party 2000s. Missed our first CCT Afterdark party and want in on the action? We’ll be hosting Afterdark parties on the last Saturday of every month, and this month’s theme is 2000’s! Join us on April 27th from 8 PM - 2 AM wearing your hottest y2K fits! 8pm
  
• House of Music: Tallahassee City Limits: Songwriter Sessions with Maurice Mangum. 8pm
  
• Blue Tavern: Once Great Estate. 9pm
  
• Eve at Adams: Hot Mess. 9pm
  
• Fire Bettys: The Apalachicola Sound. 9pm
  
• 926: Haus Of Solara Fundraiser Festival featuring drag performances and DJ sets from Iris Virus B2B Corduroy, A-Nine, and DJ Asexual. 9:30pm
  

SUNDAY, 4/28

• Bicycle House: Sunday Ride. Ride at 10:30 AM from Bicycle House. We will ride the Cascades trail to the St Marks trail and down to Wakulla station and return, about 31 miles. Ride speed is 12 to 14 mph, with periodic regroups. Vernon Bailey is the ride leader. Vernon is a new CCC member who’s been biking for 50 years enjoys riding with small groups and weekend touring. 10am
  
• Halisi Africa: Soulful Sundays. Join us for Motherland Brunch at Halisi Africa. We'll be serving our brunch special including an appetizer, main course, a sweet, and our signature African mimosas we call ukwaju. The event will also feature an art exhibition by Christopher Barnhart and live entertainment by local artists. 11am
  
• Flippin’ Great Pinball: $25 Sunday Funday. Every Sunday spend a fun-filled time with the family for only $25 plus tax at the arcade! Our normal all-day family admission of $34.99 is just $25 and that includes up to a family of 6 (two adults and four kids). Experience affordable family fun that everyone will enjoy. Noon-8pm
  
• E Peck Greene Park (Behind the LeRoy Collins Library): Food Not Bombs Free Mealshare. We offer free vegetarian/vegan food, water, coffee, personal care & hygiene products, bus passes, and clothing when we have some available to those in need. Contact foodnotbombstally@gmail.com to find out about getting involved. Noon-2pm
  
• LeRoy Collins Library: Tallahassee Go Club Meetings. Come play the captivating ancient game of Go, also known as Baduk, with some friendly games and discussions. Beginners welcome. Visit https://www.tallahasseegoclub.com for more information. 1pm
  
• Gamescape: Pokémon League. Come learn, play, and trade with the Pokémon Trading Card Game and the Pokémon video games! We LOVE seeing new players, so come learn how to play! We play both the Trading Card Game and the Video Game casually and competitively. The store offers lots of different seating arrangements to meet our group's needs, as well as food, drinks, and Pokémon products for purchase. We are also hold regular, officially sanctioned tournaments for Pokémon Trading Card Game and Video Game Competitions! 2-4pm
  
• The Plant: Open Jam. All instruments, all players welcome. 4pm-9pm
  
• Pedro’s: Mariachi Clasico. 6pm
  
• Fermentation Lounge: Open Mic Night Hosted by Conor Churchill. 7pm
  
• Oyster City Brewing: Comedy Night. Come have some laughs with us on Sunday nights! If you are interested in participating in the show, reach out to therealsleepypfloyd@gmail.com 7:30pm
  

• Ology: Marauder’s Market. Noon
  
• All Saints Cinema: Invisible History: Middle Florida’s Hidden Roots. This moving film transports the audience to a significant time during our past. Particularly during the Bicentennial year, it is important to share the gripping history about experiences on plantations in north Florida and highlight the lives of more than 9,000 enslaved men, women, and children in Tallahassee and Leon County. 1pm
  
• The Hub at Feather Oaks: The Jerry Thigpen Trio. 3pm
  
• The Bark: The Village Idiots, Counterfeit Stereo, and Amateur Act. 7pm
  

MONDAY, 4/29

• Just One More: Bingo. 5pm-6:30pm
  
• The Getaway Grille and Bar: Margarita Monday, Open-Mic Night hosted by The Saltwater Cowboy. 5:30pm-8pm
  
• American Legion Hall: Cha Cha - Weekly Lessons. 6:15pm/$5
  
• Hangar 38: Bingo. 6:45pm
  
• Vino Beano: Tipsy Trivia. 7pm
  

• City Dogs Café: City Dogs X S.C.A.M.S. Presents: Free Form Night featuring music from Frogs Dogs and an open improv session. Super Cool Awesome Music Studio (aka SCAMS) will be hosting the first of a series of Free Form Nights at City Dogs Cafe/All Saints Art Station located at 903 Railroad Ave (former All Saints Cafe building) on Monday, April 29th. The event will feature local Tallahassee free jazz band Frogs Dogs followed by an open improv portion. The look of the improv portion will depend on who shows up, but artists of all kinds are encouraged to sign up; mediums may include but are not limited to music, comedy, dance, live painting, performance art, etc. Doors and improv sign up are at 7, Frogs Dogs will play 7:30-8:15PM, and Open Improv will be from 8:30-10PM. Cover is $5 or free if you sign up for improv. There will be local vendors, and City Dogs will be serving cold beer and DELICIOUS hot dogs all night! For more information, contact SCAMS on Instagram @supercoolawesomemusicstudio. 7pm
  
• House of Music: Handsome Heroes: The Show "Not All Heroes Wear Capes, Some Heroes Wear Nothing!". 7pm
  

TUESDAY, 4/30

• Blue Tavern: Happy Hour. 5pm
  
• The Getaway Grille: Tuesday Night Bikes and Trikes. 6pm
  
• Oyster City Brewing Company: Tuesday Night Beer-go! 6pm
  
• Crafty Crab: BOOMIN' Karaoke. 7pm
  
• Gamescape: Hobby Night. Slay the grey together! Join your fellow gamers and turn your pile of grey miniatures into a battle ready army. Need some painting tips? Feel free to ask at hobby night. You can bring any miniature for any game to paint. 7pm
  
• Ology Midtown: Jazz Jam Sessions. 7pm
  
• Island Wings: Trivia. 7pm
  
• Brass Tap in Midtown: Trivia. 1st Tuesday of the month is General Knowledge with rotating themes the rest of the month. 7pm
  
• House of Music: Tuesday Trivia & Karaoke. 7pm
  
• American Legion Hall: Tallahassee Swing Band Tuesday Night Dance. 7:30pm
  
• Burrito Boarder: Karaoke with DJ Roldus. 8pm
  
• Fire Bettys: Comedy Night. 8pm
  
• Poor Pauls: Trivia. 8pm/21+
  
• Blue Tavern: Bluesday Tuesday with Bill Ricci. Every Tuesday is Blues Day @ the Blue Tavern and Blues Meets Girl is a Tallahassee favorite. This perfect, intimate venue provides just what you need for both a mid-week break and authentic blues music experience. 8pm/$5
  
• 4th Quarter: Professor Jim's Tuesday Night Trivia. Popular for a reason! 8pm
  
• Argonaut Coffee: Trivia Tuesday. 8pm
  
• The Sound Bar: Karaoke. 8pm
  
• Fire Betty’s: Open Mic Comedy Night. 8pm/21+
  
• 926: Tacos and Trivia. 9pm
  

• Blue Tavern: Shape Note Singing with members of the Quaker Meeting House. 5pm

WEDNESDAY, 4/31

• Sugar and Spice Tally: Game Night. Join us every Wednesday Night for community game night. Bring your own or use ours! Let me know if you need to reserve space for a large group. Free to attend! 5pm
  
• Goodwood: Wonderful Wednesday. 6pm/$5
  
• Burrito Boarder: D&D Night. 6pm
  
• Level 8 Rooftop Lounge: Trivia. 6pm
  
• La Florida Coffee & Wine: Trivia Night. 6pm
  
• The Great Games Library: Open Game Night. 6pm/free
  
• American Legion Hall: Sue Boyd Country Western and More Dance Class. Session 2 - Beginner 6:30 to 7:45 pm What: East Coast Swing and Waltz. Cost: $8.00 per person. Wear comfortable shoes you can turn in. 7:45 to 8:15 - Practice dance with paid admission. 8:15 to 9:30: Intermediate - 2 Step and WCS. $8.00 per person or $13.00 for both classes. Vaccines are required. Face masks are optional. Changing partners is optional. 6:30pm
  
• Perry Lynn’s Smokehouse in Quincy: Wed Night Open Mic w/ Steven Ritter and Friends. 6:30pm
  
• Hangar 38: Trivia. 6:45pm
  
• Oyster City Brewing Tallahassee: Trivia. Teams up to 6 players for three rounds with 10 questions and a tie breaker each round. Winners are by round so don’t worry if you need to come late or can’t stay the whole time! Prizes include a round of beer, a 6 pack and a gift card! 7pm
  
• Proof: Trivia. 7pm
  
• Vino Beano: Wine Bingo. 7pm
  
• Fermentation Lounge: Trivia. 7pm
  
• Blue Tavern: Wednesday Open Mic with Doc Russell. The open mic night that has run continuously for almost 20 years, once housed at the Warehouse, lives on at the Blue Tavern. Doc Russell continues as the host with the most. Sign up starts at 7:45pm/free to attend
  
• House of Music: Bar Bingo! Free to Play & Late Night Karaoke. 7pm
  
• Fire Betty’s: Karaoke! 8pm/21+/free
  
• Dukes and Dotties: College Night and Line Dancing Lessons. 8pm
  
• Finnegans Wake: Trivia. 8pm
  
• The Sound Bar: Open Mic Night. 8pm
  
• South Station: Summer Movie Nights. 8:30pm/free
  
• The Bark: Karaoke with DJ Nathan. Best karaoke DJ in town. 9pm
  
• Peppers: Karaoke. 9pm
  
• 926: Dragged Out Wednesday. 10pm
  

• Ruby Diamond: FSU Opening Nights Presents: Indigo Girls. 7:30pm

Hello Beyhive! Now that Cowboy Carter has been out for nearly a month, I was wondering if everyone has managed to get to the bottom of what each song means. I am not American or Black and English isn't my first language, and feel like I am missing a lot of the references that make this album what it is. Of course I understood what a handful of the songs mean, but can y'all help me fill out this list? I would love any and all additional context you can give me, and am excited to hear your individual interpretations and theories! I am especially excited to be educated about the political subtext and commentary in this album, because there's a lot going on but I can't quite figure out what some of the songs are about. I do get the feeling that at several points there is subliminal messaging trying to tell us something or wake us up to things that have been obfuscated. Please correct me if any of these are wrong or missing details, I will edit stuff into it based on your comments!

1. Ameriican Requiem - Addresses the gatekeeping and exclusion she faced from country music institutions, and attacks the revisionism of history as a whole, which is what led to the erasure of the Black roots of country music. She calls out the deception and exploitation people have been subject to at the hands of the American media, and declares a renewed need to take a stand against it.
2. Blackbiird - A cover of the Beatles' original that Paul McCartney wrote in support of the Civil Rights Movement, metaphorically referencing resilience and overcoming adversity and struggle. Beyoncé reinforces the message while co-signing the Black country singers featured on the song.
3. 16 Carriages - Reflects on her own experiences as an artist in the industry and the sacrifices she has had to make, as well as the sacrifices she has seen her parents make. She reflects on all the time she has spent on the road while on tour, and all the hard work she has put in.
4. Protector - Highlights her gratitude for the blessings of motherhood and her commitment to her purpose as a mother, reinforcing her promise to be her children's protector forever.
5. My Rose - Addressed to her son, and wishing for him to be able to accept all his flaws and love himself rather than feel shame about the things that make him different.
6. Smoke Hour ⭐ Willie Nelson - A message from Willie Nelson reminding listeners that music is fundamentally about escapism and fun, and that if they don't like something they can always go listen to something else.
7. Texas Hold 'Em - A love song demanding that her partner 'lay his cards down' and just be himself with her, and to be transparent and genuine rather than play games or create distance.
8. Bodyguard - An upbeat love song where she celebrates her deep bond with her man and declares that she will be his 'bodyguard' and best friend, and keep him to herself.
9. Dolly P - A message from Dolly Parton likening the character Jolene to the 'Becky with the good hair' mentioned on Lemonade in Sorry, calling out both women for trying to steal their partners.
10. Jolene - A cover of Dolly Parton's original with the lyrics revised to warn another woman to stay away from her and her man because their bond is too strong to break, rather than beg in desperation for the other woman to stay away.
11. Daughter - Reflects that while she has had a strained relationship with her father in the past, she still has several things in common with him and that she is as 'cold' as him. This serves as a further warning to her man and the other woman to never cross her, since she will retaliate.
12. Spaghettii - Challenges the concept of 'genres' and their exclusivity, tying in with her larger message of wanting people to listen to all kinds of music without preconceived notions. She attacks the manner in which country music was plagiarized and appropriated from Black people and expresses her disgust at the notion that she is not allowed to participate in it.
13. Alligator Tears - A play on 'crocodile tears' in reference to the fake victimhood and invalid outrage expressed by trolls and White people who criticize her artistic choices and attempt to regulate what she is or isn't allowed to do as a Black artist and individual.
14. Smoke Hour II - Another message from Willie Nelson reiterating to listeners that they are always allowed to drop their preconceived notions and be open to styles of music that they usually would not listen to.
15. Just For Fun - Acknowledges the pain and sacrifice she has had to go through for the sake of her career and for the larger purpose she has undertaken with her career, even if it might appear to others that she is doing it 'just for fun'.
16. II Most Wanted - A romantic jam celebrating a deep romantic bond and pledging to be her partner's 'shotgun rider' and stick together with him forever.
17. Levii's Jeans - A soft love song using the metaphor of jeans to describe her man keeping her close and hugging her body all night.
18. Flamenco -
19. The Linda Martell Show - An introduction to Ya Ya in which Linda Martell celebrates music that spans multiple genres, and the uniqueness that that creates.
20. Ya Ya - Calls for everybody to enjoy themselves and indulge in liberation and hedonism even in the face of harsh, oppressive circumstances, while also serving as a tribute to the artists that toured the Rodeo Chitlin' circuit and the different styles of music that they brought to those venues.
21. Oh Louisiana -
22. Desert Eagle - A raunchy, escapist sex jam describing her intense desire for her partner and her fantasies about getting it on in the back seat, on the sink, and everywhere else.
23. Riiverdance - An ode to the dance floor, likening it to a river that people bathe in to be baptized and freed from their sins. She invites everybody to come dance, feel love, and move freely.
24. II Hands II Heaven - Describes her hands being up in the air as she prays for forgiveness and deliverance, and also as she optimistically dances with two hands up, letting loose and liberating herself from everything.
25. Tyrant -
26. Sweet ⭐ Honey ⭐ Buckin' - A three-part song with the first chapter highlighting the warmth she feels from returning home and reconnecting with her family and heritage. The second part is a seductive sex jam tempting her partner to come lose himself with her. The third part represents her intention to buck the haters, buck conventions, buck limitations, buck the revisionism of history, buck the media, buck the government, and just buck everything in general.
27. Amen - A reprise of Ameriican Requiem, underscoring the mind control we have faced at the hands of the tyrannical government and media over decades, and declaring a need to bring an end to it.

Edit: Thank you everyone for all of this! I've got everything except Flamenco, Oh Louisiana, and Tyrant... send help!

this is half shitpost and half geniune and idk which is which
here are some reasons why texas is the best state (if you didn't already know and you somehow need convincing)

1. texas is big

go big or go home? we always go big. even if we did go home, we would still be in texas. largest state in the lower 48, you could drive from maine to south carolina in the same distance it takes to go to texas. beat that, california.

1. diversity

texas is literally one of the most diverse states in the lower 48 and accurately represents the demographics of the US population. all the people saying texas is full of old white men have literally never been to texas. especially if you go to the cities. i would spontaneously combust if the demographics of my school changed significantly. theres a reason that i want to go to Brown University.

1. food

this is the most important reason on this list. every cuisine in the world, texas has. if i want to get banging indian food, there's a whole district for that. if i want to shop at the chinese market, there's a district for that too. and tex mex? i tried tex mex in the north once. y'all don't even know what tex mex is. Please, come to texas just to try the tex mex. We also have the best brisket and BBQ in the country. also whataburger > in n out. bucees and gas stations that are one stop shops during road trips.
also chick fil a. i could not imagine living in a state with less then 100 chick fil as. they're literally on like every street corner here. we have over 3 times as many as california, at 460 for the most of any US state. chick fil a for the win.

1. less open antisemitism.
   
2. texas history
   

we were our OWN country for a while (not some fake ass republic that lasted like 25 days), and we had cowboys.

1. pop culture

we're literally famous for cowboys and the wild west and rodeos and horse riding. there are so many songs dedicated to texas and texas is probably the state with the most recognition outside of the US bc we're just that cool. our state literally is the best in the universe! (texas is the best state in the us, the us is the best country in the world, and the earth is the only planet confirmed to have life in the universe) beyonce is from texas.

1. driving

driving on highways in texas will make sure that you're prepared for driving anywhere in the us. my californian cousin was literally complaining about the roads the whole time and going at some slow ass crawl speed, when i've been accustomed to the texas way literally from the moment i popped out the womb. also you have great majestic feats like the Katy freeway and the high five interchange

1. wind power

texas produces the MOST renewable energy of any states, and its not close.
https://www.usnews.com/news/best-states/slideshows/these-states-use-the-most-renewable-energy

1. niceness and language

texan hospitality is a thing. yes, people are loud and brash. but they're friendly. like going from texas to any other state and back, its literally like day and night how people are. like in texas they'll ask you how your day has been or say good morning to you as you're walking past, and people are just really hospitable. also y'all. Y'all'd'n'tve, y'all'd've, y'all'd, y'all'd'a all hold special places in my heart.
if you were not convinced, consider yourself not a true patriot. 🦅🇺🇸🏈💵

I was a dead kid since birth/
Only screamed around mad at/
The world and mama had an alcohol problem/
So she couldn’t bother and it turned/
The house was a wreck, clouds bove’ my head/
Were I slept, everything burned, but my mama/
Told: Life goes harder, but it’s my urge,/
that you have no problems/
My father had a coma, cuz of attempted suicide/
He was rejected, so did I/
My mama gave me to adoption, cuz I was too stressful/
To keep me was not an option, what a fucking asshole/
Elected and selected, childhood was like an electric chai
Then got rejected, why should I fucking care?/
Well I found a family, that didn’t gave me to the adoption cente
They were in Tennessee, a crossing,/
it was the only damn option for me to have a/
A nice life, I’m a menace see?/
So I didn’t know what agony, would set this free/
Every day punched in the ugly belly/
Fucked up, for things I couldn’t handle, he?/
Not cocked just wanna go away, from these menaces, deem/
To kill myself, chill down I tell/
A crown just fell, deep inside the clouds/
Ma mama and ma father shouts/
It charges harder, but just don’t bothe
Be loud, the problems make ya stronge
But then it all fades away/
I just destruct myself, think of killing myself/
Filling coke, I just tell, how disturbed I felt, man/
And feel now, deep clouds coming out/
Shady, like I was back then/
Called out crazy, then end them/
Lazy, cuz I didn’t drugged myself daily/
Well I fucked myself daily/
That’s the reason, why no lady wanna help me/
I was mad at them, cuz they couldn’t save me/
Ran at an club with a knife, fucked for my life/
Went shortly out, it was so corny like I/
Was drunk and high and a dumb line of coke was involved/
She stuttered and cried, cuz I toke 9 lines, felt better than/
Life, stabbed her twice, like in a damn freak show/
She screamed loud, I punched (Shut your damn mouth!)
In this moment, it seemed out, like, fuck it’s all round/
Motherfucker’s around, I’m an Idiot/
No release like I slammed her at a bridge/
Now I stand there like this/
Damn I am pissed/
Theres no excuse mo for this, pitch/
Now the clouds are finally gone/
The Godfather, move like this Tom Sawyer, don’t bother too tight, a haunt for ya/
Gun shots right to his shoulder, a dumb farmer, cops wanna/
That I go outa my car, go mama, should a dude like me/
Who choose Ideas with no drama, should be sued by police/
See trough these seats, being tortured by low waterboarding/
Go trough his D.N.A, see him day by day/
Take way to much MDA and MDMA/
Next see me pay for coke and ecstasy/
Hennessy, it’s destiny fucking majesty/
Actually it’s the same we’re okay/
See today, I lost myself/
It’s only the damn Y.M.C.A/
Burn Churches, earn murderous curses, but you know it’s all worthless/
Wanna see me turn shirtless, go to a jerk circle or hear a god damn verse case/
Everything will turn grey and it deems, that you see me on the streets, hey/
You notice that you take cocaine and went sent raped to a slaughte
You’ve been tortured on every corner, there’s a door o
A corridor plus add a fucked up drug addict/
Fuck habits, you need to follow the white rabbit/
It seems underneath, there’s a rubbed, blood-infused carpet/
The corridor’s full of crap, rats and traps, it’s rushed/
With thug magic, clocks banging, the slaughter comes/
His shot gun and his Glocks hanging/
„You don’t need to do that!“ „But I can it“/
His daughter packs your head with a god damn canon/
His father shaves you dead, you see black, red and a violet carpet/
But you ain’t dead instead, you see them laughing at your cracked/
Abandoned scattered body parts/
Mix cyanide with white, with no license, I rewind timeless/
Classics, tired why? Ya’ll get an ass kick to the Matrix/
I remind, that I was full of panic, cuz of this madness/
By the second time, I went schizophrenic, it’s epic/
At the third time, I try a bite of magic mushrooms (fuck damn it)/
I arrive to higher minds, so I can die alright, an addict banging/
Whores, till they drive insane to dryer life, rambling through pleasuring/
Liar grounds, till they lie around and are dying out, a habit of letting/
Violence try around with kids, so it can press the average menace/
Into madness, I allow myself to introduce you to the real world/
Call me god or you all fall three blocks, I mean it seriously/
All these cops try to poorly upset me off into prison/
Listen, while I’m in the Park hanging with hot women/
You pissing cock is just jacking off to your own sibling/
While I’m bars rapping, you just shut up, that’s my god damn wisdom/
Or it goes with a lot of shots from this Winston, like this Hannibal or is it this/
Charles Manson, are you safe up in Prison with that fucked up cannibalistic Prick?/
Cars, Action, drifting in a large mansion is this Gods answer or is this/
A jaw cracking incident, motherfuckers listening/
All passion into this crime, not innocent, so why should I give a cent/
To these cop slashing niggas then, I don’t give a damn track bout them/
It’s unsetting, dip that in, try and not mention it, is it that hard?/
One shot, time stops, he’s bleeding, crawling, paranoid, android/
Call him Steven Hawking, peeling on his head, throw it at the carpet/
Now you never see him walking ever again, this wanna be Steven Hawking
This was just a little corny story, in the middle morning I gon’ tell more, don’t worry/
It was a little boring introduction to my world, ooh, why you’re screaming, my fist is bluffing/
Didn’t heard? Do I need to kick buckets or are you fucking turned? See It’s my urge that you have fun/
Rum with Tablets, it isn’t madness, motherfucking Faggots do it everywhere, I also had it/
Now you’re only a rumbling, tumbling doll of flesh, wrap, dead rape her, till her fucking breast/
Is plumping down her legs, man, I’m glad back, throw her dead visage in the packed garage/
Damn I’m dark, run over her with ma car, not sober, it’s not over, oh my god/
God’s dead, I shot in his head, with a shotgun instead of an Colt or an AK, no revenge, mam, thanks, man/
I go barehanded, fuck knife like stars of the YNC/
Thug life, I’m a masterclass rhyme MC, with a dark memory/
Death isn’t the penalty, then when, I would definitely be laying back on the street/
Put me in a mental hospital, I’m so gentle confident, back from release/
Don’t text me or speak, I preach my own peace, a piece of bones, see?/
That’s the only note I reveal, so shut off or you go packed in my lunchbox/
With overdosed hoes, this is not, where the fun stops, this is where the cum comes/
At the cocked crotch from central cee, between my mental health it’ s so empty see?/
Doin’ ecstasy, radically, LSD, Hennessy, easily it’s my penalty, later me’s sleeping/
On all the corpses I killed, on all the forces I build, on all the distortions I could break/
Doin’ my job as a taxi driver, on these messy tires, I see daily many liars/
Who try to don’t be petty bitters, but cash just blinds us, I see/
Nasty minors, who sell their body for some penny’s I’da try/
And don’t be a pessimistic writer, but this is the reality, let’s rewind us/
To the time up, I was a mindfucked, social worke
Put a potion Valium worth a million to mild children/
Then they move like stop motion, further with no distortion, building/
Them to machines, with no emotions, a sea and an ocean/
Couldn’t clean these evil distortions, easily worse abortion/
At home my mom’s there, she can’t live alone, cuz of more chromosomes/
Seeing TV, she sees me, asks: „How was it?“/
Out of it, I try to explain, she remains silent asks: „Why you complain?“/
Mom, don’t blame, day by day I’m feeling ashamed, see these people grey/
I say: „Bye, mom!“, then it all fades away, now I’m here/
In L.A, with a Taxi day by day, see these maniacs day by day/
Thinking what could it be, when I stayed the same day by day/
Put a gun onto your forehead, blow it go back, dope at/
Jennifer Lopez, a predator, but before bed, I had sex with your corpse back/
Then choke at the janitor, who stole crack, go packed with gold round my neck/
At the door, show’s back, you can’t kill me I was born dead, throw tec, so mad/
Shoot at hoes and editors, they’re so ass small like Lanniste
They’re only competitors for the smoke and predator, even the pope recognize me/
Cuz I chocked, cracked and wrapped him and then fed the poor, with bread full of wet cement/
Even the president remembers me, cuz I was attacking him daily, throw twenty babies/
Scream „Allah Akbar“ at the party, motherfucker, pop a pill then kill the police/
Then the whole NYPD in one release, fill till I bomb the whole city, (shit did it)/
Then I take the chain saw, give Hannibal Lecter a cannibal lecture, then brains fall/
All over the screen, you can scream, but it’s too kafkaesk, fuck the rest of this ass/
Sado Maso Rap, they just suck at best, what do you think, I’ve a fucked relapse?/
Yes, I had, mad, not your special guest, peer pressure down your ass/
The cloud’s dead over those, call it Heath Ledger, I beat rappers alphabetical, it’s a mean hange
It never ever seems better, but he’s at the top, screaming with real measure/
11.06 per line
Kick a bat, then choke down the slick cigarette/
Then spit it back, to you quitter ass and your Pinterest friends/
Don’t give a cent, my silhouette is picking them/
Is shitting them, is mixing Molly and/
Sips a bag crack and when they scream: „Shit, what’s that?“
Just say did I ask, kick your quitter ass back to the middle west/
Pick a guest, then I go to your nipple flesh, tickle that/
Slick a bread, then the cigarette falls to the pick up left/
Mister Bad kicks tha TEC, with a snap/
Never relapse or better be back, with bigger cash, come with me!/
Kiss ma ass, I’ma blow up like ken park, that sicko’s back/
I don’t show up, my friend calls, he’s really mad/
You greedy ass, didn’t need to kill the family/
Oh majesty, I’m a nice being man, but I can go really anxious/
Back then the TV went crazy, after the daily mass shooting in the cathedral/
But a needle fix’s it, pop the praline, what can I say, I’m just a ghost in a shell/
Between hoax and truth, there’s nowhere to tell, I’m only a small beetle/
But I can be a Star prior, my hair is on fire, Lennon, Cartney, can’t wait to retire/
Explosive Jihadist, a bit retarded, but fuck it, I’m with passion/
Fuck gravity, it’s only the inception, never give up,(Rick Astley)/
Better think of killing yourself (be big as they) in the spotlight, one mic, chilling in hotel/
From dusk till dawn, the guns are drawn, fuck the law, I got the claw/
Shot and saw, how he stutters, moans, then bust it all, over floo
A nightmare in halloween, right there’s the gasoline, burn MC’s/
Turn a sea into a blood realm, like kill bill/
Fight till we are gonna be enemies, no fantasy/
I’m the devil, nasty ecstasy, got me through it radically/
Better leave, or me’s gonna ram heavy metal/
Through your shattered knees, my system’s down/
I’d miss him now, but my fist is out, it is out/
First victim, was a pissing clown, I turned him in/
To a whipping hound, everything else was burned liquid/
With around second victim was just dripping down/
I couldn’t slit him down, what shall I do with him now, bitten out/
His wistful pounds of eyes, let’s kick a round (why?)/
Then his wrist and roundhead, do I bore you now, how?/
It’s around, a bit so loud, then I kicked him out/
Barking, starving, now you know what’s gonna happen with you now/
(Shoutout to EM), I’m to real, to pay and take a bit of tha vaccine/
But I’d keep scream for lean like rage against tha machine/
Ritalin, take the rest I’m a fiend, cold demon/
For no reason, I keep screaming, but nobody’s hearing/
Nose piercing, clean earring, a fiend fearing/
The police, but no panic, I’m Batman, with Magic Mush and Xanax/
Rapid, I slash them, choke with mo plastic than Kim Kardashian/
Tragic, like Manson, but I’m still mo bombastic, than an Afghan/
A package of crack in the back van, schizophrenic and desperate/
What’s my message at man, the message, don’t do crack, man/
An addict, slash an, panic bringer like tha clan then/
Climatic, banned and classic, like tha fuckin’ west then/
My eyes are blurred out, got that beetlebum/
Fight for my parklife, burned out, onto being busted away/
I try to write, but it turns out, after Song 2, I’m feeling numb/
Reading off the script, beat a cop, need a coffee and a TV/
They type bite, to earn loud our respect, wannabe Gotti, hehe/
Write, write, there purged sound is like mine, perplexed/
But still why, try, mock me and my CD, let’s see/
Who sells three times easily more copies after release/
Cocky, my knees bleed, but I’m taking this/
For forty of these fucked up braindead kids, who think they’re life is just a safe less miss/
Due to my wife, who is missed, this angel shit hits, locked off, dude do a mayhem, bitch/
It ain’t a risk, dude, try, got off, make a diss, then piss on this god/
Who thinks a thug can’t safe a chick, highlight this/
Boom take that risk, dawg, ask why I’d pick this shit miserable life/
Ooh, I just like this braindead shit, cuz I’m breaking this/
And everyone, anyone, so I’m taking this/
Break tha barrier, then marry a lady, ahh, don’t think I’m crazie
Go think fo yo Area 51,bury a body, in ma territorial/
I’d come, go soon to his burial with cult leaders and coke dealers/
Make, take gold Midas, Judas, go through as pope/
Toke coke then I do Jonestown, sold out, no mind reade
But a sight see ah and a Volkswagen, yo I’d go Bin Laden/
Those bros both been nodding for a week, borders release/
Keep these G’s or we make yo daughter fall asleep/
Deep cuts in my guts, need time off, bite off the Adams apple/
But God sucks, got that canon to handle, bust off/
Us nuts, fuck off, no interruption/
Destruction is the option, ends with concussion/
Busting, bend and popping, cocking again to Theseus/
We need us, thus we’d grow alone like these fetus/
Blow, no release, book the holy/
So we’d see us Mesias/
Parties, rave again on my Harley Davidson, sometimes AIDS a friend/
May call me cray again, horny, rape again, In my flight, basement again/
Inner piece, gainst’ my sinner enemies a.k.a whack MCs/
Where there best release’s a dead EP, got COPD/
Dealt, throw these weed blunts, it keeps fun, craving fo crystal/
Wes Craven nightmare, right there’s the pistol/
Baking, taking, I’m paired with missiles/
My tight mission is to befrei women with terrorism/
Parking with the BMW, see banned Gs starving in distance/
Wishing for their fantasy fiction, now in the packed alley with em/
Robbing, bombing my new edition, right blew the prisons kitchen/
Don’t be bitching, I keep reality with em/
Gunnin’ yo quarters to yo bum head, summon monsters like Lovecraft/
Come in it doesn’t cost ya, be real partners, ask god man right? Let’s spot man/
With small cottages, confident rebellion/
Call cops again, prepare gun/
I’m back from coffin, with TEC and complete London/
Snipe, pack pockets, beat strangers, caretakers/
Gotta beat these white boys, right choice like Tom MacDonald/
Dears, hear’s my voice, I choose, Zeus, Bruce, bump a vortex up/
My godlike fortress, you’re dead, nor cap, neck in the noose/
Whose the best gainst’ the soviets, get got it/
Mass monstrous, badass ain’t gains conscience/
Take, rape, no colon, go all in, fight like Parkinson, gun, come/
Dot com, none comma, bomb another summe
Brother I gotta, don’t cry momma, gon’ buy nother’/
Call me Columbine shot, ya, Osama shut up, bruh or me’s/
Choke, bite off ya neck, no respect, yo/
Don’t go yo perplexed, yo, that’s rap, yo/
Relax, go breath fresh air, so we won’t beef, that’s fair?/
Everyone hates me, stigmatize every little line/
Don’t take me serious, won’t sympathize, cuz of the bitch I’m like/
That I serve no purpose, I disturb the church and turn for the worthless/
It’s like a jerk circle, yo won’t come out, so yo won’t gon’ shout/
Your urge for the servants, blow, even if they won’t allow/
Burst their surface, beat em, go so loud, murdering, kill, till they surrende
Go stack ya, furthering, your letter to America/
They say, my music is horrific shit, what can I say, I got that politic, Tic/
It ain’t newish that this is for these false bitching kids/
Who would blew this all for pimping bitches or sniffing coke with no interest/
Thanks to bitch ass parents, who destroy the thing that, they love/
Say may sound way off topic, but what if something you enjoy/
And keeps you alive gets raid off your hands, yeah that’s bad/
Next day you can’t sleep, can’t get outta bed, think about suicide, the room is tight/
That’s fact, you release evil, even if the rules deny, lay relapse/
That’s fucked up, so I won’t shut up, till yo bastards, get the answers/
9 to 5, you won’t age, don’t be to late, I got the aggression of these motherfucking two dogs caged/
I am lined in this game, say my name, my impression is that you won’t change/
Buy and bite this chain, you don’t got too much to pay, only the pain of dudes depression, you got days/
They may be crashing, remained brains, why you fail, to leave the mansion, bro you got ways/
Get your fat ass out of this rap shit, it is not to late, it gets drastic, bro you got ways/
You ain’t god, this is not Beyonce, this is basically the worst shit, since the world trade/
Now the question is:
I raid the page from your petty rapers/
20 days later, the blood infects/
My eyes get black, plenty ways of destruction/
My stuff’s like a concussion, it keeps you quite down, my hound/
Mofucka’s dying, cuz of the street or overdose/
I’m lying, cuz these gods see me as over those/
I did Tupac, and trade, Biggie, and AIDS/
New thugs say, damn is he cray/
Fucker, Cop shooter, got numerous super stars/
In my basement, that’s that statement, you are/
Crashed in that car, where’s your face men/
Take that with humor, dawg/
Nuke a city, is it pretty, I’m patient/
I like agony, panicky screaming/
At that top of my alive lungs/
I need a shot gun, right Pun/
See these run, I clutch, my crotch/
CD’s, blunts, bleeding locked/
Please leave me, I’m done/
And than the bomb explodes/
Life goal
And I got bombs in my palms, right, broad/
I might got to crash the trade, when I fucking escalate/
Second day high school, ejaculate and I was high, ooh/
Escalade, that’s my life choose, why you try to/
Get me off, ooh, you blind you/
Ask the god, he’s just like you/
Now his head hanged off, so rewind to/
The day I wanted to be Manson, is your mind blew/
I dream of fashion and compassion, scream for a big ass mansion/
But I can’t comprehend that, there are plenty corpses under my bed/
Can’t force them to get back, I actually got no problems I’m just sad/
But everything awesome, I just need a needle and a glass/
(What’s your life goal) To become the biggest psycho/
You can’t end it, why so, get the next menace on yours wife phone/
I don’t think of hope, I’m an misanthrope/
Just shut up, when I fucking slit yo throat, oh/
(What’s with your family) Fucked travesty/
Actually fuck fame, the redroom is shinning, there’s another life here/
I just grew in time in with a father that didn’t like me/
I’m not suicidal, I just don’t got an Idea/
To what to do, me’s crying with my pills, I mean/
Drugs fucked up, kills my will to get a life, see/
But likely, it’s my psyche, think that I just unalive myself with cyanide, see?/
That’s my life goal/
Hey, remember me, I relapsed from these motherfucking Sedatives/
But back with a brand new EP, three weeks passed from the last release/
And I’m sober like a Tool track, who’s back/
Slap Winona Ryder, with a broom and/
She screams like a Duet or Duvet, (boah) I’m a wild cobra bite
Sniff air, while Coka piper, I’m no more nicer, to crack-bitches/
Had have no interest, smoke dope with imaginary friends then/
For instance with Lincoln in the cemetery, it’s back/
Cops want the pisstest, but I’d shot zig zag, cuz I’m not in that/
Instead shock Amis fussy, what do you want from me/
Money aka the devils lunch meal, the channels love me/
For the terrorists son breed, funny?/
Yeah, coming out loud like Pompeji, blow up like Chris Cornell/
In this hotel, it goes well, now down town, I’m drowned, walker it’s okay/
I take these blunts, my engaging gun to shake G’s on/
I rape for fun, I’m like K Dot, but/
I got my influence from Nine Inch Nails and Naked Lunch/
My wife is baked next to the angel dust/
I’m half awake and this bitch hurts to much like paper cuts/
I’m shaking thus, I ain’t stop, till I get bigger than the mayor got/
Yeah, the player God, make ya suck cock for a stupid spot/
The musics off, cuz drug abuse and cops are fools/
Boom it knocks with shots from the thug for the youth/
Nor the truth, I still gon’ refuse your number like a jew/
Thunder I knew, ignore the Zeus, he still needs to pay his dues, hey/
Bomber jacket, fuck the planet, that’s the new wave/
Don’t got an motherfucking plan and, just Xanax and Kool Aid/
It’s too late, Doomsday, my suit, hey, is still holy like an Afghan/
Here’s the Trash can for today/
So, first things first, I write my verse on Autopilot/
Then Burst a church, like the white clan, I got the license/
Murder purge with a tight motorcycle/
Chase Barbara Streisand, I promise, I kill ya’ll with kindness/
All remind this, I’m the best MC, you can’t get this/
The next release’s coming, it gets massive/
My tracks like Leprosy, you can’t stand, bitch/
I’m passive, right my penalty would be that I can’t rap shit/
The DEA sees me with haze, taking MDA or MDMA/
He, he, hey, while I slam beat damn fakes/
Fucker, Anthony’s over, I just smoke petty smokers/
Like Marijuana on a stoner, at the time relatively sobe
And the big three is relatively over, cuz it’s only me Big BIG/
I have PTSD and Drake has AIDS and HIV, ahh/
Remember Ex/Pornstar and I can tell X Pornstar that you ass called, ahh/
Now your son’s a sad mourner, cuz you had no prevention, but a blue pill, ahh/
Who kills your Jackson 5 hype, cuz like everyone was better at your prime, ahh/
Overshadowed by a clone of a clone, ahh/
Eyo and yes it is correct, I am a criminal
Perhaps, no cap my van is full off chemicals
But my fans are like a drop dead overdose, quite minimal
God, I guess I am back like Tom MacDonald on the subliminal
Mimic filled with circumorbital rings, because of Morphin and Gin
And I’m like Jack Kevorkians twin as you see me with often absinthe
Good Morning I’m in, moaning cuz it’s
To boring to think, how to solve my problems with binge drinking
I move demonic within the chronic Porsche like Clint Eastwood
My logic is this, I hope my life becomes a comic with this brief cook
I’m iconic, this is no feel good nor beat hook, I just wanna deal coke and beat hoes
I move Schizo due to these blows, my eyes are only beer, shows
Completely detox, me’s free blocks with three Glocks
He shots, then he’s off from beating these cops, free money shots
Mollys drop, call me god, he’s on the knock out
He drops loud, bombs blaow, he’s gone now
My eyes on the long south, pistols like Raekwon
Like I shot out missiles with Napalm, try slice permissions with fake songs
My lines gon’ pow like I go smoke crystal and haze on, fucker
Bullet proof vest, Pull it who’s back, Full sniff, do crack
Pitbulls with rabies, bitches and daisy nugget
Fuck it like Hailie and MGK, I’m dead, crazy, got it
My pockets wide with shady profit, bitch make me fuck it
I’m off kicked like bits from a daily gun click

"We are outgunned and will be outspent." — Right-wing activist Charlie Kirk, fretting over whether Trump can raise enough cash to beat Biden.
Editor's Note: Crooked is closed on Monday in observance of Cesar Chavez Day. We'll be back in your inbox on Tuesday!

Trump-Age Wasteland

Trump’s bizarre pocketbook problems led a dizzying news cycle this week. But in the noise, there’s a signal: It’s a MAGA financial meltdown.

• Not only has disgraced former President Donald Trump averaged $90,000 a day in legal fees for three years, but his campaign now says it can’t keep pace with President Joe Biden’s fundraising. In February, the Trump campaign only raised $20 million. That’s $5 million short of what Biden just raised in just one star-studded Thursday night in New York City. Trump, of course, has been trying everything he can to earn more dough, including selling golden hightops, hawking NFTs, and repping a God Bless The USA Bible. But he’s got his work cut out for him. That $5 million gap with Biden adds up to 416,736 Bibles, or 62,657 sneakers (math via CNN).
  
• Now, it is true that Trump earned billions on paper when his Truth Social network began trading on the stock market on Monday. But he’ll have a hard time accessing those funds anytime soon, for technical and legal reasons. Meanwhile, financial analysts have been quick to point out that the company’s skyrocketing market valuation is untethered to the reality of its dismal, almost nonexistent business prospects. “I’m reasonably confident the stock price will eventually drop to $2 a share and could even go below that,” one finance professor told CNN this week—a forecast that would mean a 97 percent collapse from Friday’s closing price.
  
• Trump’s not the only MAGA high roller with money problems. Lawyers for Rudy Giuliani, the longtime Trump lawyer, asked a bankruptcy court not to force the ex-New York City mayor to sell his Florida condo, lest he—and this is a real quote—“join the ranks of the homeless.” In a motion filed in the US bankruptcy court of Southern New York on Thursday, Giuliani’s lawyers argue that since he has already agreed to sell his Manhattan co-op to help raise funds to pay down debts, including the expedited $148 million dollars payment to two Georgia election workers, Giuliani needs someplace affordable to live. Specifically, someplace with a podcast studio. Giuliani, meanwhile, was reportedly overheard in Mar-a-Largo saying he feels trapped in a “nightmare world.”
  
• The far-right pillow guy is in trouble, too! Not that he’d admit it. “We’re fine,” said My Pillow CEO Mike Lindell after a court Wednesday ordered My Pillow’s eviction from a suburban Minneapolis warehouse. Lindell’s company is at least $217,489.74 behind on rent. This is just the latest financial shitstorm to hit Lindell, a man who has already spent $40 million of his own dollars in a quixotic attempt to overturn the 2020 election. In January, Fox News stopped running My Pillow commercials, in February, a Federal judge said Lindell couldn’t squelch on a $5 million dollar promise, and now the $1.3 billion defamation lawsuit brought against him by Dominion voting has reportedly entered the discovery phase.
  

Lucky for Trump advisors and the Trump faithful, the Grifter-in-Chief is promising to hold the biggest fundraiser ever next week, April 6th, in Mar-a-Lago.

Look No Further Than Crooked Media

Which job do you think involves more improv about immigration policy, starring in Veep or working at the real White House? On a new episode of Inside 2024, actor and former White House staffer Kal Penn joins Dan Pfeiffer and Alyssa Mastromonaco to talk about their time in the White House together and how accurate shows like The West Wing and Veep really are. To get access to this Friends of the Pod subscription series and others, head to https://crooked.com/friends now.

Under The Radar

Another key inflation figure dipped slightly last month, the government said Friday. Good news!... right? Tell that to the 63 percent of Americans who say high prices are still a serious hardship. Ah… the Biden vibecession!
What's with the gap between what economists have been saying about inflation lately, and what everyone else feels? For one thing, inflation may be down, but it’s not dead. Gas prices jumped 3.8 percent in February, while airfare rose 3.6 percent. The cost of clothing and housing also ticked upwards. And companies—Cheers, guys, appreciate you!—are still passing inflated prices on to consumers. Those with the lowest incomes are often hit hardest. Former Presidents Obama and Clinton acknowledged this at Biden’s fundraiser in New York. Obama said: “If you're working hard, and your paycheck is getting stretched beyond the breaking point, and you're worried about rent, and you're concerned about the price of gas, it's understandable.”
Furthermore, people are still feeling the pain from the truly gargantuan increases of the recent past. The combined inflation rate for three key essentials—gas, rent, and food at home—reached a staggering 18% in 2022, according to Axios. It’s a lot to expect people to just get over a shock like that anytime soon—even if recent numbers are finally looking less dire.

What Else?

It’s been a year since Evan Gershkovich was imprisoned in Russia. His sentence was extended until June. Let our Evan go—and the six Russian journalists arrested this week, too.
A crane that can lift up to 1000 tons has been deployed to the Port of Baltimore to help with the clean-up from the bridge collapse. Pieces of the bridge weigh as much as 4000 tons.
Gambia could reverse its ban on female genital mutilation because erasing women’s right to bodily autonomy and safety while limiting access to physical joy has always been a global pastime.
House GOP leaders will send articles of impeachment for Homeland Security Secretary Alejandro Mayorkas to the Senate in a high-stakes game of tag.
Social media use is trending down, down, down, and Twitter’s lost the most users. Yes, I dead named X with my full chest.
A Telegram user advertising on X says they’ll make an AI-generated pornographic image of a real person for $10. Sigh. Nonconsensual AI-porn: Not just for celebrities anymore.
Indigenous peoples of New Zealand, Tahiti, and the Cook Islands signed a treaty conferring personhood to whales, even though, arguably, whales are better.

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Light At The End Of The Email

Beyonce’s country album has been living in the world for most of a day. Listen as one Queen pays homage to another. (Fun reminder: the banjo is Black.)
Love is Blind Season 6’s Chelsea Blackwell launches merch: We’ve all been a Megan Faux at some point in our lives. Reclaim the shame!
Fluffle, the word for a group of bunnies, has been Wiki-wished into existence.
International Day of Trans Visibility is Sunday, March 31. A moment to say: We see you. We love you. You bring us joy!

Enjoy

Mary Gillis on Bluesky Social: "MYSTERIOUS STRANGER: * hands woman box * If you press this button, someone you don't know dies. WOMAN: Ok * presses button *. STRANGER: Whoa, I didn't even tell you about the money. WOMAN: I can't afford to pay much. STRANGER: No, you don't pay. WOMAN: Oh good * presses button again *. STRANGER: Jesus Christ"

I’m seeing more artists with their new releases at the top of their top songs, which is very very unlikely. There’s no way beyonces 2 new country song are more streamed than all her other songs. Did Apple change how the tops songs works? Or artists faking streams more?