Basket weaving patterns for small hearts

Hello everyone, I'm gonna start this off by saying thanks to anybody who will read this as it will be a long one, and anybody willing to offer me any advice.
PS. This post started as a post where I was asking for college advice, but as I wrote more I realized any advice would be really helpful so I changed the title a bit, Thanks in advance again!
[[ Beware: My whole lifestory coming up combined with tired midnight grammar 😅 ]]
To get to the point, I currently live in Croatia and just turned 19 a couple of months ago and a time has come when I am again thinking about college. Some background on me, from when I was very little I was always interested in engineering and art, it all started when a teacher of mine in the 5th grade of primary school introduced me to programming and robotics. From then on I was in love with everything to do with electronics, robotics, mechanics programming, and fundamental sciences, maybe even math itself, but that's beside the point. During those years the passion for all of that really grew. I went to countless robotics competitions during my time at school there and even won lots of prizes. One time I almost came to world-level competitions but sadly missed the first place by a point. When I was home I sadly didn't have much equipment for any of these interests except a computer. It seemed limitless what I could do with it, whatever I wanted to do I could make it. It's not like electronics where as a kid getting parts was difficult except from old salvaged electronic devices. I could learn and make whatever I wanted, as long as the old family computer could run it. So I started learning a lot about computers during these times like basic algorithms and some basic games random Python scripts etc. In terms of computers, I was no genius, but for the age, I'm grateful I took the time to learn even the basics of it. Other than that I was a somewhat weird kid because I couldn't really take picking off some classmates as a joke and got annoyed at it quickly when they started interrupting me while I was drawing ( My dad was an artist in his youth so I picked that up from him, been scribbling every day in primary school when class was either boring or some kind of recess ) but even though they were picking on me, I to this day still really don't mind them, we were a pretty close class at the end of the day. And that's how most of my primary school went by, me being social with only a few friends and my informatics teacher as well. Other than that I was pretty sad during those years, I couldn't understand people and was contemplating the meaning of life as well, and that combined with me inheriting some stubbornness from mom, she and I were always fighting for homework, screentime, etc. Right now we are in a very good relationship so I'm greatful for that aswell. Seeing how I didnt really talk outside of school to many people expect a few friends ( I do live in a small village so if they were the same age as me they were in my class ) i basicly spent most of my time while not staying after school in a computer club we had for few hours every couple of days a week, i was cooped upped inside my house, playing with legos, being with grandparents or my cousins or being on computer and doing some programing, scripting, photoshoping and other things you can reasonably excect a child to do. And so passed most of my primary school.
When time came to plan for highschool, I originaly wanted to go to art school, but was quickly turned down by my mother because she thought it wasnt a smart idea. Personaly didn't like it at first, but she is a smart woman so in time i understood. Basicly other then liking to draw and paint, I wanted to go there bacause my best friend from class was going there and he also wanted me to come along. ( Funny how me the least popular guy and the youngest guy in class and he the most popular guy in class while also being the oldest were best friends, but thats a story for another day ) As my mom turned down my suggestion for art school she suggested I go to a school for a Mechatronics Technician. I didnt not like the idea as well I loved everything related to it. Other than that another option was Computer Technician ( basicly a programming oriented path ) but I decided mechatronics because i said to myself i can learn programing at home because the only tools i need are a computer, and mechanics, electronics and robotics is something I dont have at home so it will be really cool to learn all of that here and so, highschool started.
Oh how fast has the reality come crashing down as I understood what the whole mess of the education system actualy was. Most of the classes didnt have any equipment to actualy do anything practical, the other small portion that did the rest lf the 95% of class didnt understand anything so we couldnt do much or what was the more often scenario is that the proffesors just didnt really care at all so we would come to class and do absolutly nothing, like literaly nothing except waiting for the bell to ring. After i realised that I just started not coming to school most quite a bit. Mostly was not comming on fridays, some wednesdays etc most of the times I was actualy abit sick, but every time i was sick i exadurated it so my mom would let me stay home. Even though i was missing quite a bit of classes, if a class had something to do with math or logical thinking ( which most were ) i would usualy either be best at it in the class or almost the best for the pure reason I was actualy really interested and loved all the cool engineering stuff. On the other side if a subject was about 0 logic, full random name memorisation like the croatian literature class, I was almost if not the worst in class managing just barely to scrape by. Other than that there was one proffesor who I admired so much for his style of teaching, as he tought me so much during the only 2 years he lectured me ( my fourth year of highschool he was out because pention ). In simply half a year we went from 0 knowledge to designing, printing, creating and soldering a whole circuit on a pcb, I was always there for his classes. On the other time we were doing something else, he always had some cool stuff prepared when i was finished with work early, he was a great guy and still respect him alot. Other than that i was really disapointed how there existed zero after school activities that i could do that had to do anything with electronic, mechanics, robotics or programing.
On the side of my social life, the summer just before starting highschool I realised this was a great opportunity to redeem myself as i really didnt want to get picked on like in primary school. So what other kind of persona would somebody come up in this situation than one being supported by my pride itself, other than that i was basicly a "chameleon" aka adapting to every person around me which was probably the reason i made some friends but it usualy tired me out completly. And so it started really great actualy, nobody was picking on me, i was socialising ( only inside of my class usualy, other than the people who went to this town from my village that i already knew, but it was a big step up for me ) and learned how to shrug of others banter by pretending it didnt effect me. It was definitly in a better possition then primary school alright, but i did realise alot of people just moving away sometimes because of how i just increased pridefulness as i got more vulnerable. I think i was able to keep my pride to just below some overflowing point as i still managed to make a few friends.
And so some time passed, at home watching more videos about everything to do with engineering, getting a 3d printer and messing with it, programing some more and even trying to learn some business, economy and more about money. I even developed a game for the school as some special thing I got by talking to a teacher of mine. Other than that at the third year, thanks to a profesor i was able to get in touch with a software development company and was able to secure an internship for basicly the whole summer, which was a blast. I learned so much new things that opened doors to alot more things. After that i focused my random "Jack of all trades" learning to be mostly focused on modern used technologies, and the needs of possible job recruiters, and well it in general. That is the point i feel i truly started learning proper programing.
More on my development of pride, in highschool and in primary school i was actualy praised quite alot and being actualy abit good at something maybe was the thing that allowed me to get even some friends by being prideful. We can call that being lucky as the stars alligned, but anyways. During those years i also had two experiences with me falling in love for the first time. The first one didnt last more than a 4ish months maybe, it was basicly a crush thing that ended in a broken heart, but o boy it was a good waking called. I wonder what would happen to me without this realisation. Then the next one lasted basicly 7-8ish months in the 4th year of highschool, and this one was much more complicated and longer, but after it i learned quite a new few things. These two things really awoken me to who i am today, as i try to live each day with as much virtue as I can. I threw out the pride out of the window, and dont really care too much of somebodies bad opinions on me, if there are currently any. I came to terms with alot of things and am just able to accept things for what they are, without judgment.
As im writing this its quite late and am tired so sorry for bad grammar i want to shorten this abit. Basicly my whole life i loved scientists, engineers and the idea of colledge. Was always dreaming of becomingba "great scientist" like albert einstein or nikola tesla but the older i got, the more things i learned, the more that dream of going to colledge got shattered by reality. As i realised the giant flaws in the education system, after learning about money and realising colledges are just big businesses trying to earn alot of money, and that that is their main motivation, combines with seeing that scientists basicly to get any money and recognition these days need to literaly hop from trend to trend, research what is "in" currently or well no bread on the table just made the academia route of my life shatter before my eyes. Seeing how i knew quite abit computers i thought i could atleast land something, but after seeing people who were much longer in the industry praise me for a impressive knowledge on alot of fields and my ability to almost instantly grasp any concept thrown at me, i actualy got a job. Well this was how I decided to start working immediatly instead of going to colledge. After weighing the options combined with the additional knowledge i got about the job market, this was an obvious choice. I believe that my key to being objective is me being realistic, so sadly i know am not some do it all genious and know i need to rely on whatever i have to use as leverage to enhance my life, so learning from Warren Buffet that out of everything I got, my time was my biggest asset. Simply being young with the above average skills i have, I believe i have a reasonably good chance to have a virtous and fulfiling life.
But i still have that burning flame in my chest, i still love the idea i had of colledge, of becoming a scientist, an engineer. I tried looking for ways to convince myself otherwise and see that i was actualy wrong about it all, but each time i look, more and more i realise my initial assumptions were right. The world is slowly moving away from official education like colledges as everything can be learnt online, because of ai the next few years are going to be revolutionary in all of these fields so either the colledge courses are going to be very outdated or just some concept of a job will not simply be needed as a diffrent one apears. The posibilities and their volatility is just so high that i dont feel even 1% safe actualy going to colledge, seeing how devoting like 5 years to it will mean loosing the onlx advantage i can use, and that is me starting out young. And as a bonus because i have a job i actualy have more time than colledge to persume my other interest like mechanics and electronics as well as actualy funds.
Thanks for reading all of this, I can trust it was quite a journey reading everything i written basicly half asleep but i hope you were able to understand everything. Im really confused what to do, as I love both options but knowing that one has a much better chance of being useful to me than the other. Any advice you can give me will be greatly appriciated, be it about college like is there an actualy good colledge in europe thats is worth it in my place, or general life stuff, about work etc. Once again I cannot thank you enough for reading this and helping me. Thanks!
Edit: I havent said much about my job because this is more of a general reddit but for people who are in the field I am a backend developer, with some freelancing and opensource contributions on the side

I am so insanely ungrateful...
... for you planting in me those thoughts of not being worthy of presenting myself to others, of taking myself seriously, of recognizing my needs as important. So important that the impulse would arise in me to act for myself, to take care of myself. To see myself as a valuable person, at least as valuable as everyone else.
My ingratitude also for you not making it obvious to me to take care of myself. That I don't take myself seriously. Because what others feel was always more important.
... and for smiling for others instead of myself. Why did I have to make sure everyone was okay?
Why was I not allowed to disappoint anyone? Why did you make me believe I was responsible for others' disappointments?
Why was I not allowed to have "negative" feelings? Why were those feelings equated with ingratitude (since one should always be happy for what one has, always keep in mind that others have it much worse!) "Eat your greens, especially broccoli. Always remember to say thank you (especially for the things you haven't had)!"
... That I don't take myself seriously or endlessly question myself when I feel bad. Am I even allowed to be sad about the things that were done to me? For the things that were dismissed, or withheld from me? Am I allowed to get help when I'm not feeling well?
That you didn't recognize or didn't want to see (so you wouldn't be blamed) how much my environment stressed me, despite signs like biting my nails, withdrawal, gaining weight etc. Why didn't you move away with me from that place, as you had considered...
... for never discussing feelings, my feelings, my condition, or our relationship. And conflict/argument was always avoided like the plague. The difficulties of talking about feelings and interpersonal relationships with others run like a thread through my life. What was so difficult about talking to me about emotions?
Then I often have to ask myself: Were my feelings even justified? Or just manifestations of my (of course undesirable!) (hyper)sensitivity? Was I only sad because I took everything too seriously? Because I wasn't grateful enough for this normalcy? Grateful for not having it much worse?
That it turned into me not being able to confide in anyone, because I'm actually ashamed of feeling like a victim of your treatment, or feeling anything at all. Of needing something. Useless things, like closeness and security. Help, sometimes.
That I only felt understood in music, felt held, not alone with my feelings. That sometimes I can even express myself better in English about myself and my feelings because of it.
Why did you leave me alone so often? At the inn? In my room? With my toys? While you got drunk? You praised me for my independence, for making myself so small and inconspicuous and keeping myself busy. Yes, I confirm that boredom also breeds creativity. Guess I should be thankful for that, too.
That I now feel constantly lonely, inwardly longing. Always searching for love from people who cannot give it to me. I searched for deep emotional connections, even as a child, and if I hadn't had Grandma, I would be completely lost today. Not just emotionally. So as not to be run over, one must keep up... be overlooked, step back. Why didn't we cuddle? Why was there so little physical closeness? Why did you never say you love me? It felt so weird and wrong to say it to someone else later in life even though I felt it...
My heartfelt ingratitude also for constantly telling me that self-praise is vain. That one should not be too proud of oneself, not think too highly of oneself, not be too convinced of oneself, but rather be modest. “Too much praise is bad for children, then they think they are something special, something better.”
Now I don't really know anymore when I'm allowed to be happy about myself. When I'm allowed to be proud of myself. After all, I am special, and in some ways even better than others; as everyone can do something special or better than others.
My many talents, which I could be proud of... why do I always feel unworthy and inferior? Why are my paintings, my songs, ... never finished? I always feel I have to apologize for alleged mistakes in my art.
//
But the poet says defiantly: My whole art is one single mistake, born out of wounds. That you inflicted on me. It lives to defy you! To disturb you! To show itself to you! Why should I hide all the wounds I have survived, despite your treatment? They are not my weaknesses! They are not my fault! They are nothing I should be ashamed of. Instead: they are your hindrance to my perfect being. Your fault. Your shame. Your responsibility.
My songs will ring in your ears and echo and tell you what you don't want to hear! Because it reminds you of your own vulnerability, which you deny, which you hide from. My paintings as your mirrors. My words as your death sentence!
I am angry for you, little inner children, for being treated like that and for being asked to put your feelings and needs aside like that. For not even being allowed to be sad about it. I see you and now I'm sad for you. You deserve to be heard, to be comforted, to be freed from the garbage that was served to you. For this garbage, we can all be truly ungrateful from the bottom of our hearts!
I shouldn't be ashamed anymore for all the things that developed in me, because you are superficial, neglectful, insensitive, intrusive, spiteful people. I now know that you should be ashamed, not me.

BoxOfficeTheory Presale Tracking
USA Showtimes As of May 17
Presales Data (Google Sheets Link)
BoxOfficeReport Previews
DOMESTIC PRESALES
Furiosa Thursday Comp assuming $5M for keysersoze123: $4.49M

• abracadabra1998 ($5.46M Thursday comp. GxK obviously really propping the average up but for now I could see that settling at around $5 Million, still good pace! (May 12). Really good stuff in this market (May 9). Reallyyyyyy good day 1 here. I want to note that: NO I do NOT think preview numbers will be that high; it's just highlighting the fact that this is likely a movie that will be running hot in my market, as cinephile blockbusters usually do. Next update I will have T-14 comps, which will be a lot lower due to the short release window (May 8).)
  
• AniNate (Encouraging to see the weekend fill out a bit. Been seeing a lot of promotion during the basketball playoffs so general awareness has to be getting there now. (May 15). Skimmed through ThuFri and Valley View (Cleveland vicinity) has sold roughly 60 Furiosa tix so far while Tinseltown (Canton) has sold 40. I'm guessing the upfront audience does lean more toward the urban/cosmopolitan sensibilities (May 9). Presales show there's definitely some hype for this. Regal gonna irritate trackers again, offering no upcharge IMAX for Furiosa (May 8).)
  
• Charlie Jatinder ($3.05M Thursday comp.)
  
• el sid ($5.8M average Thursday comp (without Exorcist 2) (May 12). Furiosa continues its strong performance in "my" theaters. The movie yesterday had already 1.310 sold tickets (for Thursday, May 23). Up 15% in ca. 24 hours which isn't bad at all after the first rush. Already comfortably in front of The Fall Guy's final sales (it had 1.071 counted on Thursday for Thursday) and almost on par with Civil War's final sales (1.357) and also the Apes finally had not more than 1.657 sold tickets in my theaters (May 11). I also can't complain about Furiosa's presales in my theaters, not at all. Already 1,138 sold tickets (in all of "my" 7 theaters) for May 23. 14 days left. Promising start. Civil War on Thursday of the release week for Thursday had 1,357 sold tickets and The Fall Guy finally had 1,071 sold tickets (May 9).)
  
• katnisscinnaplex ($3.94M Thursday comp.)
  
• keysersoze123 (Definitely chugging along. I am feeling good about 5m+ previews (May 15). It has way stronger sales than Garfield and that is expected. I am thinking of 5m previews for now (May 14). I think this is a solid OD presales. With a short PS window its probably looking at 5m+ previews (May 9).)
  
• TheFlatLannister ($4.71M Thursday comp. Second straight day of weak growth. Not a great sign (May 18). First meh day since presales started (May 17). Keeps climbing at a strong pace (May 11). This continues to grow at an excellent rate (May 10). Really strong day 2. The short presales is for sure a factor (May 9). Not seeing much of a breakout. Still pretty solid start to presales (May 8).)
  
• vafrow ($3.5M Thursday comp. A bit of a step back today (May 18). It's starting to heat up (May 17). Comps are showing as steady since the last update, but it actually dipped quite a bit this week before rebounding today. Advance ticket buying has been so off in this market recently for some reason. Holding pace with Apes is a good sign (May 16). It had a good day (May 12). Mediocre day 2 (May 10). Not the hottest start. IMAX is the format of choice though, so, ATP will be high (May 9).)
  
• YM! (Southeast Wisconsin: Pretty solid I guess for Furiosa. Seems that most of it's business is in the Marcus Theaters in Mequon/Waukesha so not really expecting much a diverse showing but there seems to be a fanbase around it. Feel good in everyone's 4.5-5M previews range (May 17).)
  

Hit Man

• vafrow (Getting a theatrical release up here in Canada, and early signs are that it might get a pretty decent screen count. Not super wide or anything, but a pretty decent amount for a weekend that has a lot of other releases (May 14).)

The Garfield Movie Thursday / EA+Thursday Comp: $1.22M/$1.97M

• abracadabra1998 ($0.72M EA comp and $1.19M Thursday comp. The two comps that are most helpful, Wish and Trolls (not PLF, EA on a weekend, family movies) are both pointing to a lot lower than average, so I'm inclined to give those a lot more weight. I'm thinking $500-600k for EA (May 18). Still not really accelerating, and the EA is falling against comps (May 12). Good EA numbers, but many of these comps were PLF-only EA, which this is not, so I think the ATP will be quite lower and that should be adjusted for (May 9).)
  
• AniNate (EA screenings are pretty filled to the brim here now for what that's worth. Maybe a surge in family demand will present itself later next week (May 17). EA sales look decent now, but this does feel rather weak compared to the IF presales. Not 100% certain what's going on here but based on this I buy the trades' opening estimates over the forum vibes (May 15). I definitely haven't seen as much of a rush here with Garfield as with IF (May 11).)
  
• el sid (The very even sales are a good sign (May 7). For Sunday, May 19, I can already report that also in my theaters it looks very good for Garfield. They will for sure add shows soon. It has so far only 1 show/theater and the shows are almost sold out, between 1 and 4 seats are still available. So my guess still is that this movie if it's not totally bad (and first reviews here were quite positive) will become a (big) hit. Seems not much on Thursday but it's a step in the right direction (May 6).)
  
• katnisscinnaplex ($0.91M EA comp and $1.11M Thursday comp. Lightyear probably the best comp here size-wise for Early Access, probably ends around 750-800k (May 18).)
  
• keysersoze123 (4 days later. Almost no pace so far. Sunday shows are near sellout and so limited growth. Previews are like 35% of Panda 4 and Friday is under 1/3rd. That said this will under index in MTC1 as Panda also did that. Still struggling to see this as a breakout. Looking at the current state, it looks like half of IF as well !!! Of course that had Reynolds and did not finish that great (May 17). Its definitely weaker than even Elemental. That said these movies tend to finish strong and so I am not writing it off so early. Just that the long PS window is irrelevant for them. They could rather start presales like a week before release and it would be all the same. Meh. We have to wait until next week to gauge where its going to finish. It has very low ATP as well and actual would be even lower as its going to see tons of kids tickets (May 14). Early shows are regular digital shows at 1PM this sunday. So ATP will be very low. I think 500k ish at best. Preview let us see how things go in the final week. Presales at this point are almost non existent (May 13).)
  
• TheFlatLannister ($2.18M Thursday comp. Not much movement at all in the past week. Probably heading to $2M+ (May 17).)
  
• vafrow ($0.4M Thursday comp. Comps don't paint a pretty picture though. EA shows are doing okay (May 11). Still no sales for my core sample for previews. But I did the larger sweep, which shows the interest right now is the Sunday early access shows. Looking at sales patterns, it's mainly blocks of 3/4 tickets, so likely families grabbing some. It's worth noting that the May holiday in Canada is the weekend of May 17-20th, not the weekend after with Memorial Day. I can see families prioritizing getting out the holiday weekend when they have more time (May 4).)
  
• YM! (The combined previews total for Garfield is 35 tickets with 23 tickets coming from EA, which is pretty solid. Still thinking around 2-2.75m previews with EA as while not as widespread, the showings seem like they’re filling up nicely. Think Garfield does about the same as IF though OW as due to the likely lower ATP Keyser hinted at iirc and seemingly little screen space with no PLFs. Meh, kids animation doesn't really make much notion until the Monday for release and Garfield seems indicative of that. Thinking the 1.5-2M Thursday previews range folks were spitting out makes sense. Nothing screams breakout though and the fact it's getting one screen, maybe two at most for previews makes me feel like OW might be similar to IF (May 17).)
  

Bad Boys: Ride or Die Thursday / EA+Thursday comp: $3.64M/$5.30M

• abracadabra1998 ($3.78M Thursday comp. These numbers are from last Thursday, as per my post this morning. This is a more walk-up movie a la Aquaman or Apes so I think it's a pretty good start (May 18). Pretty good start for it honestly (May 16).)
  
• katnisscinnaplex ($5.30M EA+Thursday comp.)
  
• TheFlatLannister ($3.68M Thursday comp. Well, this is a pretty good start (May 17).)
  
• YM! (Again, another solid start-ish. I expect Bad Boys to have the most diverse audience. Can't really predict much on previews but I am feeling confident in the 55-60m OW range for the past few weeks (May 17).)
  
• vafrow ($3.45M Thursday comp. Comps are not the greatest. One, surprisingly hard to find a comparable film with similar start on sales. Plus, I think ticket buying patterns have changed pretty drastically in my market over the last few months. There's very little up front sales compared to late 2023. Dune was the exception (May 17).)
  

The Lord of the Rings Extended Edition Re-Releases (June 8-10)

• BoxOfficePro (Fathom Events has also announced that select Regal Cinemas will present the films in 4DX on June 22/23/24 for Fellowship/Towers/Return respectively (May 14).)
  
• katnisscinnaplex (Up to ~1,400 shows now with new locations picking it up and others adding a second showing. LotR1 has sold 831 seats OD, LotR2 sold 715 seats OD, and LotR3 sold 735 seats OD. For comparison, Phantom Menace didn't break 800 tickets until T-3 and we're still over a month out. JW3 comp is currently around 9m (it was at 1,670 tickets sold at this point!) (May 6).)
  

Inside Out 2 Average Thursday Comp: $7.66M

• abracadabra1998 ($3.67M Thursday comp. Holy numbers of shows and seats! Multiplexes are really expecting a lot here. Sales off the bat not amazing here sadly, but we shall see where it goes (May 15).)
  
• AniNate (It is encouraging that Canton is already giving me something to work with with 12 Thursday preview sales. Same number for Fri-Sun. I do see nine sales for first Thursday at Canton now and I think that's a pretty solid start (May 15).)
  
• charlie Jatinder ($11.37M Thursday comp at MTC2.)
  
• katnisscinnaplex ($6.21M Thursday comp. Early sales just haven't been there lately except for the extreme fans. $12.27M Mario comp (May 18). Already at 180 shows for previews in my areas and still has a few theaters left to post. For comparison, Godzilla x Kong finished with 197, Kingdom of Apes 190, and Kung Fu Panda 205 (May 14).)
  
• keysersoze123 (At least the show counts show Plexes are expecting a big OW. I dont remember when we last had a animation movie start with so many shows. I wont count Mario as that was a fan driven movie. Definitely not great presales but this is not a fan driven movie. Let us see where things are in the final week (May 15). Too early to judge presales as ticket sales just started early this morning. Families dont book tickets on weekday mornings. Wait until evening today to judge it. From a release perspective its way bigger than all animation movies seen recently including Panda 4. Easily the biggest I have seen in a long time. Only movie which is not comparable is Mario but that was not just a family flick (May 14).)
  
• Porthos (VERY BAD COMPS: $8.06M Thursday comp. What a strange pre-sale pattern. Threw in Shazam 2 and Barbie simply due to having nothing suitable at T-27, and I wanted something that was backloaded in pre-sales. Was prepared to make a smart-aleck comment about the unsuitability of the pre-sale pattern of Barbie, but after today's update... Okay, yeah. Still no. But what a weird pattern. Was there some sort of promo that dropped today that I'm not aware of? Either way, just a great day (for this type of movie at this point in pre-sales) (May 17). Fairly strong day today, actually. Was concentrated at a couple of theaters (including a small group sale at one showing), but still, sales are sales (May 16). I really do not have good comps for this movie. Like, at all. Especially for D1. With that in mind, I did some digging and did manage to get the Elemental D1 numbers out of the old Tracking thread: IO2 = 5.45946x Elemental on D1 [13.10m]. Now will Inside Out 2 be as backloaded as Elemental? Well it's tough to literally sell 5.5x times the amount of tickets on the final couple of days that Elemental did, so perhaps not. But it does show how fracking backloaded purely kids animation is. Anyway, this is 30 days out and it isn't a CBM film (like AtSV) or CBM-adjacent film (like Incredibles 2). The Sonic 2 comp is perhaps a little concerning. On the other hand, nearly a weeks more of pre-sales so not exactly a great comp. 3.5% of presales are 3D and 40.1% are PLF (May 15). On the Saturday of release weekend (ie NOT EA) there is a special event screening for IO2: INSIDE OUT 2: FUNKO FAMILY EVENT! (2024) Sat June 15th. Might boost the OW slightly, depending on how wide this event is and how much more these tickets will presumably cost (May 11).)
  
• TheFlatLannister ($8.97M Thursday comp. Definitely the biggest rollout in showings since I've started tracking Florida. Bigger than even Dune 2 and it's only T-26 (May 18). This is a super super strong day 2. Probably just Orlando overindexing, but yeah starting to lean towards something big brewing. Florida presales are somehow even crazier. Sold 2357 seats and is getting a blockbuster rollout in terms of showing allocations. Kung Fu panda comp day 2: gives me $8.50M (May 15). Well, I can't really tell if this is a breakout or not yet. Looks very good especially in the first few hours. These are probably terrible comps, but might as well try something (May 14).)
  
• TwoMisfits (I'm kinda shocked at the opening set from my Cinemarks... 2 screens (1 PLF, 1 not) and 6 showings at my PLF 14 for Thursday (and 11 showings on the same screens once it runs full day - 7 PLF b/c 1 is 3d on the reg screen, 4 not)... 3 screens (.75 3d, 2.25 not) and 9 showings at the non-PLF 12 for Thursday (and 12 showings on 2.25 screens once it runs full day)... So, 2 and 2.25 screens for the weekend presale sets... Disney must be charging a huge % for themselves b/c this is an Elemental opening set at my PLF...a little more generous for Thursday at my non-PLF, but then they too drop to an Elemental opening set after the adult Disney base Thursday rush... (May 14).)
  
• vafrow (No new sales. Whatever glitches in the system on day 1 didn't push sales to day 2. I still think the lack of base ticket options will push families to wait. Cineplex has jacked up the cost of premium formats, plus they're throwing in an increase for opening weekend of major releases. It adds up quickly for families (May 16). With the site glitching yesterday, it might account for the slow start. But, what's interesting is the format breakdown. Nothing is being made available in anything close to a regular showtime. The one non 3D showing in Dolby is a matinee showing. Everything else is carrying a hefty premium. They'll likely release regular showtimes closer to release, but right now, it's priced to get eager fans to pay the premium formats (May 15).)
  
• YM! (Seems IO2 is playing more like a kid's animation than a family event in start of presales. However, it is pretty solid for what it is. Do not have comparisons for anything but I like that Majestic is healthy and it about 66% of Garfield T-6. Thinking anywhere from 75m-100m OW rn but can change as we go along (May 17). In fairness it's only been an hour but yeah sales are softer than I expected. However, it is a month out and will largely skew more towards kids than say TLM/Across so wasn't expecting a blitz like them. Here at Marcus theaters are going all out for IO2 with it having the lion share of PLFs with it getting both screens when there is two PLFs with tentpole like levels of screens (May 14). Was taking a look at Marcus Cinemas to see that they have preloaded Inside Out 2 showtimes which seem to start at 3:00 pm on a Thursday. It seems like Marcus is going all out on it as judging from showtimes it's taking away all of Bad Boys’ PLFs in that theaters that have two+ PLFs are giving all to IO2 (May 11).)
  

Deadpool and Wolverine

• keysersoze123 (Only number that matters is OD presales. after few days it will hit a trough and then it will plod along until social media reactions and reviews hit close to release. I think we can kind of predict its OW after its OD presales (May 18). RESPONSE TO PORTHOS: Captain Marvel had very strong sales on its OD despite early start. So OD is all about fans. It does not matter if you start 2 weeks before or 9 weeks. They will still book. So it would be interesting to compare OD sales not only with CM for @Porthos but also the big openers in 2022/23 period from MTC perspective. 1) DS2 - 230k ish. 2) Thor 4 - 136k ish. 3) Wakanda - 110k. 4) Ant 3 - 88K. 5) Guardians 3 - 70k ish. I wonder where Deadpool 3 will land. Anything is fine as long as it does pull in a Marvels (May 17).)
  
• Porthos (No point of comparison for a movie starting presales this early (60+ days before release). Only MCU entry which comes close was Captain Marvel back in Jan of 2019 (T-58 start date). Aside from that, the only other Disney release would be TROS starting at T-59. This is gonna be the longest pre-sale window for a major Disney release since The Last Jedi all the way back in 2017 (which looks to be around 70 days if a cursory check of when tickets went on sale is correct). Hell, it's gonna be the longest major release of any studio since Fast X's execrable 99 day pre-sale window. Have had some that came close-ish, but probably the most on-point recent comparison will be Jurassic World 3's 43 day pre-sale window, which is still over three weeks shorter than this one. I mention this because the sheer length of the pre-sale window will very likely depress the D1/D2/D3 sales somewhat. Maybe not much, but you can't tell me there'd be no difference between a T-21 launch, a T-29 launch, a T-35 launch and a T-65 launch. Sure, it's a matter of smaller degrees when comparing something like a BP2 (starting at T-38), but that extra month is probably gonna slice some numbers off the top of the pile, especially after the first day (May 17).)
  

Domestic Calendar Dates (last updated May 16):
MAY

• (May 19) Review Embargo Lifts [Garfield 9 PM EST]
  
• (May 20) Presales Start [Deadpool and Wolverine (9 AM EST)]
  
• (May 20) Opening Day [Monday: Spider-Man Homecoming Re-Release]
  
• (May 22) Presales Start [The Watchers]
  
• (May 23) Presales Start [Summer Camp]
  
• (May 23) Thursday Previews [Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga + Hit Man + The Garfield Movie + Sight]
  
• (May 26) Presales Start [Bikeriders]
  
• (May 27) Opening Day [Monday: Spider-Man Far From Home Re-Release]
  
• (May 30) Presales Start [A Quiet Place: Day One]
  
• (May 30) Thursday Previews [Ezra + Haikyu!! The Dumpster Battle + Summer Camp + Robot Dreams]
  

JUNE

• (June 3) Opening Day [Monday: Spider-Man No Way Home Re-Release]
  
• (June 5) Presales Start [Despicable Me 4]
  
• (June 6) Presales Start [Twisters]
  
• (June 6) Thursday Previews [Bad Boys: Ride or Die + The Watchers]
  
• (June 8) 1-Saturday Re-Release (1st day) [The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring Extended Edition]
  
• (June 9) 1-Sunday Re-Release (1st day) [The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers Extended Edition]
  
• (June 10) 1-Monday Re-Release (1st day) [The Lord of the Rings: Return of the King Extended Edition]
  
• (June 13) Thursday Previews [Inside Out 2]
  
• (June 15) 1-Saturday Re-Release (2nd day) [The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring Extended Edition]
  
• (June 16) 1-Sunday Re-Release (2nd day) [The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers Extended Edition]
  
• (June 17) 1-Monday Re-Release (2nd day) [The Lord of the Rings: Return of the King Extended Edition]
  
• (June 20) Thursday Previews [The Bikeriders + Janet Planet]
  
• (June 27) Thursday Previews [Blue Lock The Movie -Episode Nagi- + Horizon: An American Saga Chapter 1 + A Quiet Place: Day One]
  

JULY

• (July 1) Presales Start [Longlegs]
  
• (July 2) Opening Day [Wednesday: Despicable Me 4]
  
• (July 4) Opening Day [Thursday: Possum Trot]
  
• (July 4) Thursday Previews [MaXXXine]
  
• (July 11) Thursday Previews [Fly Me to the Moon + Untitled New Line Horror movie]
  
• (July 18) Thursday Previews [Twisters]
  
• (July 25) Thursday Previews [Deadpool and Wolverine + Didi + Fabulous Four]
  
• (July 29) Presales Start [Alien: Romulus]
  

AUGUST

• (August 1) Thursday Previews [Harold and the Purple Crayon]
  
• (August 8) Thursday Previews [Borderlands + Colleen Hoover’s It Ends With Us + Cuckoo + The Fire Inside + Trap]
  
• (August 15) Thursday Previews [Alien: Romulus + Horizon An American Saga Chapter 2 + Ryan’s World the Movie: Titan Universe Adventure]
  
• (August 22) Thursday Previews [Blink Twice + The Crow + The Forge + Slingshot]
  
• (August 29) Thursday Previews [City of Dreams + Reagan + They Listen]
  

Presale Tracking Posts:
April 23
April 25
April 27
April 30
May 2
May 4
May 7
May 9
May 11
May 14
May 16
Note: I have removed most tracking data that has not been updated for 2 weeks. I think there is value in keeping data for a week or two but at a certain point they start to lose their value and should not be treated the same as more recent tracking data.

Can anyone tell me if I am the only one . Is it me am I the problem? I don’t know what to believe anymore I wanna know someone give me a reason an explanation fuck give me an excuse for all the moments in my life that pain so white hot and intense has wracked my body and brought me to my knees when my will to live has been brought face to face with my darkest fear. Where the only words i can hear as death whispers in my ear is my name sweetly spoken in promises of a quiet mind and peace. Can anyone hear me is this thing on. My fear is fading out and I know I should be scared at this but I don’t feel fear the same anymore. it is blurring around the edges and starts to look a lot like comfort something I just can’t seem to find or hold in my grasp, and I tell myself I should be scared at this but my soul is battered and bruised and I am running on fumes.I honestly don’t know how many more days I can wake up to this bleakness of my uncomfterably painful existence. Is my pain all in my head. Did I do something that has led the People i love to mishandle me. Do I deserve to be wrecked every day the minute consciousness returns to this weapon that is my brain. Ive torn myself apart so many times ive made myself BLEED. ive let my pain soak into me till I no longer existed in space, gone without a trace. I try so hard to do no harm. As I am falling apart. I pour and pour from my empty cup. Its been empty from my fucking start. My dad was the first to mishandle my fragle new heart. He is where my cracks did start. Home was a battle field amd my skin was where my father’s anger would wage war. I grew up being told I held the golden cup full of my father’s favor. It never would save my skin from his anger. And I was told, no reminded often, how wicked I had been to the first being my heart ever truly let in. I grew up feeling every blow they took wrapped in guilt savagely placed on my heart to go along with my skins own marks. I was Twice whipped but only one would ever heal the other would bleed me every day even till today. At 8 is when death would first whisper my name to me . I never knew never would he ever depart from my mind and heart. At 9 so small and yet already my soul felt so heavy. My wounded little family grew by one. And traveled miles back to where my first cry had taken place. Where I would be born again and die more than one time. 9 taking on a little one. The second soul who would come to know my heart. Cherished and so loved even before air would give raise to his own challenging start. My mother would finish the killing of me without stopping my heart. The tiny soul I had hoped for was ripped away from me unexpectedly. Given away to have a chance, a brand new start , Or so that is what was said. 17 years I would mourn this everyday feeling like a piece of me was lost. By 11 melancholy would already call me home. School the escape from the war at home had become a battlefield of its own. And wounds would be added to the collection that had started. My first brush with a razor and a mans warped desires would fall in this timeframe not too far apart. Ill never know why my mother would make guilt and not love in me grow. Love for my parents I have felt from the start and still with each mark on my heart they would leave on me, the only thing I would ever bleed is my desire that they would want me.that they would love me. Can a child grow up too young? I don’t think I grew up tho. Ive been trapped in the tiny body that never had a real chance to start. By 15 I had lost both parents and one sibling already I was torn apart and bleeding. My wounded heart festering as it began to rot. The razor blades became my closest friends. At least when they marked my skin, I had wanted it then. They always stayed and helped me cradle my already too heavy pain. They knew what I would feel and that it was real. They went in deeper,beneath my surface on purpose. Something no one else wanted to do or so it would seem to me that no one really wanted me. My first love found in a man would be one that would feel much like my dad. Hands too rough and words never in the only shape Ive ever really wanted L O V E He Left more torn up marks on my heart. Heartbreak at 16, you would think i would have welcomed it like an old friend . that I would have tucked it up besides my heart hidden beneath my ribs, where pain was already rattling around in. pain makes us seek out comfort wrapped in deceit. I looked to the arms that made me weep for comfort. I never would find comfort there. for me there all I found are things that broke me. 16 I was 16 when the first piece of me truly died. I watched it die in her eyes. as the words scorching up my throat and heart left my lips. I watched as they connected the dots of things that mothers should not behind her eyes as the piece of me died. I was a daughter never cherished by my father, pain the only thing he gave for me to gain. I was a daughter never loved by my Mother given to men and left to defend alone the monsters my mother let in. Pain separated me from bonds that should have been. I would later see that the monsters I fought inside of me had always really been me . I grew up lonely both on the battlefield I was forced to Fight to survive in real life and inside the prison bar confides of my own mind. I fought and waged war constantly never knowing the enemy I had been fighting the whole time was always me. I don’t know who I am I died before I got the chance to even begin . Love is supposed to fill up your heart and shape you into the person you are. Teach you to swim in the depths of our own emotions. I never learned how to swim in the oceans I hold within. Ive been slowly drowning since I was a kid. Told that the validation I would grow to need like a drug, heroin to a fiend just so that I could feel something good inside the depths of MY being, a liferaft to keep me afloat was wrong of me to ever have a need. But How do I save myself from drowning beneath each giant wave my emotions bring crashing down around me. I cant swim in the ocean beneath my skin. Waves constantly crashing in and dragging me under. My air is running out and the only thing I hear people shout is SWIM!. as water replaces my lungs empty spaces. Blood hurts more than water its true but let love boil the water and it will still hurt you just as much too. Never feeling loved by my makers I searched for it in other spaces. Except the only place it should have been. My children you will never know of the force of love I hold for them. But I am still only a human. Trapped and stunted in the child that has been calling out in pain. So many lessons I have gained I see them now neatly wrapped up in my pain. I have been told by the ones I love both with and without blood, that I am too much because of my pain. Yet when I agree and try to erase me I am told to stay as they then walk away. Why. Why. Why Do I have to stay and everyone else gets to walk away from the darkness that takes my light away. Happiness feels almost like a myth a conjured up dream to dangle just out of my reach. And I have been told that its happiness I thieve from those around me. What kind of monster does that make me. That I would take the thing I so desperately need from someone that I love. It has been told to me that I am the creator of my own misery. That I should be a better human being and stop claiming to be the victim to the things that have brought death to my mind so many times. When I reach for help. Water rushing in as my screams are ripped out. Never a hand has been held out. Only the boots of blame and shame to push me further down. My pleas have begun to fade out. my voice is weakened by the consistent beacon, the sos hanging above my head running down my eyes and out my wrists that everyone claims to miss. No one will hear me if they don’t believe me. How do I convince them my pain is real. it means its me I have to kill. Then everyone will say I had been real and not the ghost I thought I had been when i was drowning and didn’t know how to swim.

Now that I discovered this community I am pretty confident what is happening to me is all tied back to this lovely little jaw muscle. I see my GP Monday 8am . Hoping for any advice - better details - corrections on my wrong assumptions or statements and ultimately a little reassurance and validation from yall , That what is happening to me right now is all connected and I am not crazy.
10 months ago I had my last 2 upper molars pulled the "ol fashioned" way with the wiggling and the tugging and the ripping and the "Okay now you're going to feel a bit of pressure" followed by the feeling that your jaw is in fact being ripped out of your mouth.
Things started mild 6 months ago intensified around the 3 month mark and now these last 3 weeks I can barely function. I feel the definition of "Malaise" hits perfect. I'm afraid to leave my house the head pain / brain fog has me feeling like I could blackout any second, And the whoosh / vertigo / world spins has me terrified of driving.
So here is what I'm feeling in order of how they hit , everything is on the left side if that matters
Shoulder Blade - Everything is felt along the bottom of the blade.
Jolt of fire and burning on the skin -- A tearing and ripping under the skin on the muscle - Starts to vibrate a tingling fire sensation outward in a semi circle
When I put my tens unit on there the flexing caused pain on the top of shoulder and collarbone.
Always strongest when I lift or carry, random bursts when I'm sitting doing nothing and now even the weight of my phone sends it to 11
Muscles Weakness and Tremors
When the blade pain is bad, I can barely grip anything with my hand, Hands tremble and different arm muscles randomly will twitch and flex.
My jaw is now (2 weeks) shivering / chittering (IDK wtf it is) as if im cold. Digging my fingers into the facial knots will stop it. Always hits when I first get out of bed, then a few times during the day no pattern in the trigger
Eyes/Ears
Couldn't keep my contacts in more than half day , left only felt cloudy hazy blurry - They are brand new lenses and Ive been use the good "eye juice" with no changes. Tried yesterday had to take em out within an hour.
Sharp twinge zap inside the ear - cold trickling sensation down the canal - ends with a punch of pain behind ear on the thick neck tendon
The Whoosh (Is this brain fog? Something else?) Zap / Jolt of electricity on top of my brain but under my skull - The whoosh when i see everything spin a 360 for a second - And ends with me "off kilter' for minutes to hours, As if there is a delay between what my eye sees to when my brain processes. During the spell ill feel "wonky" "Out of body" "tunnelly vision"
The Exploding Head
Its a constant feeling / sensation that my head is filling with sludge.
Forehead & eye have waves of intense dull aches, This part is killing so bad right now, even with NSAIDS it never stops having pressure just relieves it slightly. When it kicks hard and throbs my eyes go really fuzzy and that im going to blackout feeling hits. I have not actually passed or blacked out thank god - my cats would eat me alive in a day -
Jaw/ cheek & gums are twitchy with tightness/fullness and pointy pain shockwaves. The M in the TMJ is a ball of rubberbands and it is so very tender. My face does not appear to have anything swelling outwards from here but poking around in there i find tons of lumps I can break up.. Opening and closing i have full range I think and right now no popping or pains when i do. The area by my ear where the bones connect is so tender, but I dont feel lumps much here. I feel such relief when I hit here with my point tool.
Side of my Neck has small mushy lumps just under the skin and some big daddies deeper in and these ones get stabbyy pains that pulse with my heart.
Back of my neck the bottom half is gravel I can break up pretty easy but I think 3 more come back in their place.
Base of skull I have golf balls burried deep,. They dont throb but when I rub them it is painful but in the best way because I feel such release everywhere else but then they hurt for days. When I rub them to hard and deep oh man sore for days.
All this ends at my upper back and this area is awful. It burns on the surface level 24/7. Icy hot tricks my brain for about and hour. I did some scraping massage here and it sounded like rice krispies and I think hese are adhesions vs knots. .Deeper is full of thick knots, I have the trigger point hook to dig in there and sometimes magic happens and the ache everywhere else gets better for a bit.
The floating bone
It was mild discomfort, odd feelings of tightness inside my actual throat, tingles and a dry feel. It started wiggling around on its own pretty often and when I felt that first water balloon pop inside yikes I was scared AF. Now it just moves whenever it wants. I barely touch it and it "shoots" to the other side. Massaging in here hurts so GOOD! Looking all the way up and feeling from chin towards throat I have many bumps all different sizes. And lastly when I move my head certain ways it feels as if there is a leak happening and almost mucus-y like I could cough but usually dont need to
If you are still with me many apologies this got longer than I thought it would. Today has been my worst day so far, all the pains I mentioned are now hitting at once. Today I was sitting here sobbing in pain it because I was at 13 / 10 and wouldn't ease no matter what I pressed on . 3 Naproxen with 3 ibuprofen gives me about 3 hours of refief right now. I know posture is a part of my pain levels and ive aready ordered some tools so I can correct.

In kindergarten (sorry I'm from singapore so we follow British but if im not wrong its like 5-6 years old) I already accepted Christ into my life. But my mom is a "I hate Christians!!" kind of person so I didnt dare to tell her anything. I didn't really have a good relationship with my mom cos to her studies are everything and she made me (until now) think that I'm never good enough. And I was only in primary school thinking my mom doesn't like me. I'm worthless, I want to kms. I made plans to grab the knife from the kitchen, jump off and things like that. Eventually I resulted to scratching my own skin cos I feel most pain when it's right at the nerve uk.
My whole life was until the end of primary school (12) was only to do things to make my mom happy. I wouldn't mention a word about Christianity to her. And when my mom was out at night, me, my dad and my sisters would worship. The moment the door opens, I scramble into the room. This also make me walk far from God and I would curse, swear and stuff. One day in P6, the last year of primary school (12 years old) I thought "Hey, I'm Christian so why am I swearing? Isn't this a sin?" So I stopped cursing. Of course, my mom wouldn't want me going around cursing but I didn't really do it for her, but rather for God. But I still didn't want to tell her about it.
When I graduated from Primary school, in Secondary (Sec) school, I finally got to bring my phone to school (13 years old), but my mom still could track me. Anyways I got to listen to some worship songs my dad sent to me and because I didn't have a music player downloaded and wasn't allowed to download any apps, I would listen through the WhatsApp audio player thing😭😭 on the way home. Usually on Sundays whene my mom isn't home,my dad would bring me to church. Then of course my mom would find out and scold me and this continued until sec 2 (14).
In Sec 3 (15 years old), I had whole control of my phone so I would listen to worship music on the way home. One day in, my dad brought me to church. My mom saw my location and immediately got mad because she knew where my dad's church is and also because my older sister attends service too and my mom was not happy. Since then, I was afraid to go to church. My mom even cornered me one day and made me promise not to go to church or I can forget calling her my mom. I kept crying that night and never dared to go to church (mind that i dont even cry often).
But towards mid year(?) I just decided ok Imma go to church. She can get angry but it won't really stop me. Because I got to know God through worship songs and now I wanted to know him more.
I regularly started praying in the morning on the way to school. Eventually my prayers became a ritual and dry. I felt no emotion and no pull towards God. Only on days when I was really upset/angry then I would feel Him comforting me. One day I really wanted to be the captain in my CCA (it's like after school activities but still part of school programs) and I didn't get it. I was so upset I cried on the way home because I actually put in so much effort into it. Then I became vice captain so ig that counts.
Anyways I became really upset and got frustrated because I didn't prove myself enough. I had so low expectations of myself, got depressed again, but I couldn't vent it out because I couldn't hurt myself anymore after learning my body is a temple of God. So I got super frustrated. I prayed for guidance decided to free up my Saturdays I went to church. Youth services for Secondary school students were on Saturdays and not Sundays so yeah. Towards like October last year I cleared up my Saturdays so I could go more regularly to church, and my mom was defo not happy AT ALL that I went with my own initiative. She ignored me for several weeks and of course I felt lonely and all buy eventually I felt okay because she doesn't even know me sooooo.
I'm still trying to patch up my relationship with her. Honestly, it's so strained I don't know what to do. I've prayed that she would accept Christ everyday but uhh nothing. This doesn't mean I don't believe in God if not this would not exist
One day I was fellowshipping with my dad. Why we did that is because of a long story that would be saved for another day.
But this is the part where it's important
Previously I had dreams and I shared with my dad because he is more experience in deciphering gifts and stuff (I'm sorry if you don't believe in gifts but I do!) And he told me to pray about it because I somehow knew these dreams had meaning and relation to God. A number of dreams had direct inference to God. I did pray about it, and also asked God along these lines; "God, give me guidance. I have strayed and I know. Lord please let me understand, and let me also be close to You. I want to know You, and I know, I haven't read the word. Lord, motivate me to read the scripture, and while reading let me also understand the dreams I have been having my whole life."
I can't remember what I said exactly. The one 9f the church sermons on one week talked about how God is not far, but we are far. And I felt that that was for me. Then one day my dad said to me and my older sister "I don't care you have to download the Bible rn" so I downloaded it but did nothing with it. Finally, one day I was late for work (yes I worked when I was 15 because I actually want an electric guitar) and it was New Year's Eve. My colleague texted me saying she'd pick me up and I said and quote "Isokkk I walk over" (me) ... "Give me your block" (colleague) "Omd tyyy" (me)
Part of me didn't want her to fetch me because it would be troubling her. But I don't know why I waited and was thinking "bruh I could've reached by now but she's late" but I just waited. I was wearing full white that day. And this woman must've thought I was going to church because it was a Sunday morning.
And she asked "Hello, are you going to church?"
I said "oh no no, I have church at night because it's countdown service. (basically the youth services brought our church service from Saturday 4pm to Sunday 8pm because we wanted to countdown service together)"
She said," Oh! So you're Christian! Do you read the Word often?"
I blushed because so many signs and I haven't read a single word. "No," I was so embarrassed
She continued "I used to be a teacher, a lecturer in a University (if im not wrong) There is a website called 7 minutes with God. It was originally created for Harvard students because they were busy and didn't have time to spend time with God." Then I couldn't hear what she said because she was talking so fast. All I knew was she was summarizing the website and encouraged me to read it.
I read it like on January 2nd this year on the way to school ( I'm 16 this year!!! But not 16 yet because as I said, it's not my birthday yet or anytime soon)
I was so inspired that I kept on reading the Word and devoted mornings to not only prayers (that I allowed God to guide me and not just pray for the sake of praying) but also for reading the Word!
See, when I prayed to have motivation to read the Word more, God gave me the sign THREE TIMES which I did not pick up until the 3rd sign, the lady. The first time during the sermon I was like "Yes God, I will do it!" but did nothing. The second time when my dad asked me to download the app version of the Bible, I said "Yes God, this is the sign!" and did not do anything. I got discouraged because my dad thinks I'm funny and wouldn't take my words seriously omd 😭. But the third time, God literally sent a random woman I don't know and told me to read. And I read, praise God!
this is the part where it relates to the meme
Because when I went to the shower I kept laughing because I thought of this meme. I didn't read the word or get touched because it was a coincidence. So coincidence? I think not! It's a miracle ❤️❤️❤️
I finished Mark and the New Testament, I'm currently at John right now.
Just now, after a meeting with my cell group (a small group for easier prayers etc in church), I was listening to worship music, and my grumpy dad was like "GO AND SHOWER" liek chill brou. So I went to the toilet with my headphones on and sat on the floor and just continued listening to worship music. Then my dad sent in the family group chat (just me, my older sister and him, my mom got mad and left) an article about this man called Patrick Lee/Bezalel. He is a local artist faithful in Christ
But reading halfway I kept crying because I was so touched (again I do no lt cry, but I related so much I cried even though nothing had to do with me, but it was like my mother's story where she had a hard of stone towards God) and then my phone went flat 😐 So I risked it and ran out to get my charger but thank God (like actually) my dad didn't scream like he would. Then I sat at the toilet floor and continued reading. Tears kept flowing down my face because Patrick Bezalel's story was such a miracle, and God kept giving him signs that God existed! And removed the layer of stone that surrounded the man's heart and made it soft and open to God again!
After that I continued worshipping God and was listening to worship music (yes in the toilet because I literally have 0 privacy because none of my parents think I need it). I kept crying because the songs were so related. Can you imagine? It went in this order:
1.Presence,Power,Glory 2.Hosanna 3.Promises 4.Holy Forever
Again, coincidence? I THINK NOT. It was so planned, like it was in my playlist for so long and I haven't really thought much about it. Tears kept streaming down and kept going and through sobs I silently prayed to God
"Oh my dear God you have been so so good to me, and so faithful to me Lord. You have guided me, guided my heart and nothing has gone wrong in Your hands Lord. I've been through the turning point I've prayed for. You have sent people, songs and my family members to come after me to open up to You Lord. Lord, I was having a CG (cell group) meeting and something just touched my heart. I am now sitting on the toilet floor and typing this, because Lord you have made a way to touch my heart, guide me through a prayer that came deep down from inside of me Lord, thank You for providing. Thank You God for the miracles You have did in my life, and all that I prayed for has came through Lord. The turning point I prayed for was when that lady had spoken to me about how to set aside time for You and the Word. Lord let me not forget this incident, this turning point, this miracle Lord. Let me put my trust in You Lord, and let You take my hand and let my life be walking next to You faithfully Lord. Lord I pray that I would not waver, and I would not take my eyes away from You. Even when I am crossing and walking toward You on water in the sea, let my eyes be on You, and the works You have done for me, and not be distracted by the worls around me, but to keep my eyes on You diligently Lord. Lord, I am a sinner, and now, I was, for You have sent Jesus Christ, Your Son, to die on the cross for me. Lord, I believe in You and I want to accept You in my life Lord, no matter what situation I am in. Lord, let people around me see Your love, joy, and faithfulness in me, and not let them see the girl I was before. Let them see change, and the love and desire I have for You, Lord. Let them see Your greatness, Your goodness and You. I thank You for everything You have done, and in Jesus's name, I pray that I will walk faithfully alongside You, and will not fail to continuously pray and worship You God. Thank You Lord for the miracles, for this turning point. Thank You God for guiding me, and let me be the branch that bears fruit, and let me be the branch that has life only through Jesus, Who is the vine, Who the reason I live Lord, Who is the reason I have life. Praise the Lord! Amen!"
This is the first time I prayed for so long and every one word was truly from deep down fron the depths of my heart. I couldn't stop crying. I really couldn't and I can't emphasize more that I don't cry often! Either it hurt me so much or that God moved my heart. This time was tears of joy.
I hope this could inspire someone out there, because in another prayer I prayed for those who needed God, even if I didn't know them.
Pray. Pray and ask God to help you seek Him. One thing I learnt from a sermon is the fervency in your prayers. I didn't mean to add this in but I suddenly saw this note I wrote on 25th February.
Title: fervency in prayer Fervency: being excited about something keen on something
At the heart of revival is the spirit of prayer • pray fervently • pray with faith
"But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed"
To be fervent in prayer is to pray tenaciously despite our struggles
Hopefully this helped someone out there, inspired you and is one of your signs to start giving your life to Him! It is actually proven 1 in 3 people are Christians. Isn't our goal to have this faith to reach all four corners of the world? It could sound impossible in the past, but now there is social media, anyone could read and realize "Hey God is actually with me!"

Hi All!
First time buyer here and wanted to get some general advice before shelling out money for a conveyancer (money that would better staying in savings). We inspected a relatively new block of units (5 years old) and really liked what we saw and told the agent we would like to put in an offer. We know this particular unit has been listed for a month at a good price, first red flag
We bought the strata report yesterday and with our limited knowledge have been through the 700 pages…
There seems to be a few other red flags raised in there relating to water proofing of the roof, fire safety certificate and cladding. There is a rectification order relating to a slab of concrete, and no fire safety certificate, so it’s my assumption that this won’t be passed until the cladding issue has been rectified.
There is one line that says to rectify all issues it would cost $5.7m
There are currently no special levies on this building but from what I can see there’s an extensive legal battle between the owners corporation and the developers, with documents referencing insolvency, and administration of the development company.
The development company is listed as owning a large portion of the units, which is a concern because if they are in administration (and another assumption) I doubt that they would pay towards the costs of rectification, and the costs would need to be divided up between the remaining owners.
My heart says $5.7m between ~300 units is a small price to pay if the value increases once the building rectifications have been completed.
My head says too many red flags and the building would need to be vacant whilst cladding work is carried out, meaning rent/mortgage payments simultaneously
Any advice would be greatly appreciated! Happy to give more detailed information from the report for anyone wanting to help further.
Thank you!

I’ve been in a relationship for over two years with my current boyfriend and I’m happy but there’s always this part in the back of my heart that feels like this relationship isn’t mentally or physically satisfying me. for the past two years I’ve poured my everything into this relationship. I’ve always gone above and beyond for my boyfriend, whether it came to birthdays, anniversaries, him graduating school, and even small achievements. If we go on a date, I’m the one planning everything in the one making the plans. I take care of absolutely everything and I never feel appreciated or thought of.
On my birthday last year, he had absolutely nothing planned. he gave me a gift which was a kind gesture, but he didn’t have anything planned for the day. no reservations no movie tickets booked, nothing. When I asked him where we were going he just said “oh idk how to plan for these kinds of things you figure it out” because he never reserved anything and it was so last minute we ended up having to go to a chain restaurant that closed in an hour. for my birthday this year, he bought me perfume. which he didn’t even pick out himself. he just decided to meet me at the mall and have me pick it out and left after buying me it. he had a migraine and couldn’t take me out to celebrate but promised he would take me out another time. we never did end up going out and I didn’t end up celebrating with him.
now, for the last two years I’ve gone above and beyond for his birthday. I would reserve places months in advance and plan the entire day for him so he could feel appreciated. last year for his birthday, I bought him a bunch of stuff he uses or has been wanting, we went out for dinner and spent the night together and I even surprised him with a cake. the year before that I took him out for dinner and had a hotel decorated for him. but I in return have never received any gesture like this. I’ve communicated with him about how I always feel like he never plans or does anything nice for me and he says he just doesn’t know these things like I do. I’ve stopped asking for so much from him because I’ve just become so emotionally exhausted that I’d rather keep my mouth closed than have to deal with his excuses. I just want to feel appreciated, I want to feel like I’m being thought of, and I wanna feel like I’m deserving of the love I give out. I don’t know what to do or how to approach the relationship at this point. I love him but it’s so hard maintaining a relationship that feels like you’re giving out 90% and they’re only giving 10%.

I'm using voice to text, so if there's any errors, I'm sorry about that. But basically, me and my boyfriend I've known him for 5 years, and to make a long story short, me and him have broken up many times in the past, but we haven't done that in a long time now, unless you count one of our biggest... well, maybe not our biggest moment, but our most biggest one in the last year, I would have to say. Where he didn't talk to me, like, ever for, like, weeks, because he had this job, and I tried to make it work, and he just said that it was pointless, because his work always made him too tired, and he was always so busy. So eventually I gave up, and we didn't speak for like 5 days, and I thought that was the end of our relationship. But he came back, and I guess he was gonna quit the job anyway or something, and he didn't tell me that. I don't know, I guess I haven't brought it up to him fully how I felt about that, in the way that I figured out that he didn't tell me that he was going to quit the job. But anyway...
Me and him always have had our big problems and our small problems. And, you know, I guess a lot of them we fixed or we at least came to a mutual agreement about or something. But, I always noticed that we always seem to have some type of problem. Like, it's always different. Usually in a relationship there's usually like a pattern, right? And I guess me and him do have a pattern, but the pattern is that we always have a lot of problems, you know? It's all different types of things. Like, you know, he'll be too busy. Or me and him will fight because one of us said something to the other and we had a misunderstanding. Or, you know, a lot of big things. And, I mean, things have gotten better over the years, but it always feels like no matter what we do, there's always a problem. Even if we're not fighting, even if there is nothing to technically fight over, like in this case that I'm going to mention soon, we just always seem to have problems. And I communicate about it and stuff because I like to think of myself as trying to be emotionally mature. See, I have a mental health condition, but I have done a lot of research and psychology research and all this stuff and I use that to my daily life to make my relationships better and such because I had a bad experience in the past. So, yeah.
But the point is, I like to try to communicate and I like to try to explain myself the best way I can and I like to make sure that he doesn't get defensive or feel like he needs to be defensive and I'm trying not to attack him. I used to do that in the past, but I've been doing better with that. But even then, it seems like we still have this pattern. If we're not fighting, then you know, it's just he's distant or whatever or something else is going on. But um, basically what's been going on is that for the last few weeks, he's been really, he doesn't really talk that much. He texts me a good amount, I guess. Well, if you want to call it a lot, but he says he wants to call, but then when we do, he just wants to silently watch Netflix and we barely talk about anything and I barely get any acknowledgement. And I've noticed this behavior ever since I was kind of feeling insecure when me and him were trying to be intimate and I kind of shut things down and he said he was okay with it and that's not why he's in the relationship with me, but he's been weird ever since
He said that he wasn't using me for that stuff, and that it was okay if I said no. So, that's what I said. And then we were talking again, and at first things seemed normal, but then I told him later on that I had been crying. And he was almost making jokes. He was like, Ah, I have a few questions about that, but I'll ask in the morning, but I might not remember in the morning, so I want you to write down something. And then he started using, like, stupid code words, like, in the notes app that he was making me write. He was, like, something with, like, side of ketchup and stuff. And then I asked him about it in the morning, and he was like, ah, it was just a joke. And I'm like, what? I don't know. And he's been weird ever since, but, like, I didn't think anything of it. But, that was just, it's been weird. And maybe it's a coincidence, maybe it's not. I don't know. I don't think he would do that, but at the same time, I don't know. Because I didn't reject him. He even said we could do it tomorrow if I wanted and I said yeah. But then he never initiated anything tomorrow because we didn't talk that day. And I'm so confused. And I just feel like I'm always stuck in this loop of not knowing what to do. And I feel like my relationship is doomed. And no matter how much communication I put into it, we always have these problems. So what's the point in asking him for attention over and over and over again?
And I know that most of you are like, just communicate. But, I don't even know how many times I've had to communicate with him in the last few years. It's probably been in the hundreds if I had to be honest. At least it feels that way. It probably is that way. And I'm not saying that he doesn't comply. But, at the end of the day, there's always a problem. And I'm so tired. And, I know that relationships have their struggles. But, I'm just so tired of it all. I'm not tired of him, I'm just tired of dealing with all of this stuff. I just want to move on from the past. It feels like no matter how much me and him grow as a person, there's always just something off. If it's intentional or not, it's still always there.
And look, I love him, and I... ...really feel like he makes me a better person at the end of the day. But, I don't want to spend my whole life... ...always... ...trying to make things work... ...if something is not going to work. Or hoping that someone's going to change. I think he's changed, but... ...I don't know if certain dynamics of the relationship have. And I mean, I guess that's not for any of you to say if... ...the dynamic has changed, I guess, but... ...I don't know. I just don't know how to keep on trying... ...over and over again. How many times do I have to communicate? Most people... ...feel like it's a chore just to communicate once with their loved one, which obviously communication is good, but...it's a struggle, even to do it rarely. I try doing it, like, every single day, it feels like. Obviously it's not every single day. And we don't fight every day. We don't even fight every week. There have been times we... ...I don't think have fought for, like, a month or two. But... we do always have a communication problem. Even if I try. I'll say, hey, this happened, and, you know, he can listen all he wants. He can even try to change. But something always goes wrong and I don't know what. It's like we fix one problem and another one magically appears that has nothing to do with the previous.

I'm closer to retirement than not. Live frugally, invest everything I make which is about 1-2 every 2 weeks. My spending habits and credit card use are S+ tier and so is my credit score. I didn't think in the fire way until later in life so I know I'm mediocre here but I am perhaps looking for more risk to take on to speed things up. My life situation is very stable and I stand to inherit a lot of property including the one I live on now.
Breakdown:
560k in (unamed broker for security reasons) wealth management, concentrated in high growth. They buy and sell back there behind the trad IRA tax firewall which is nice and comfortable feeling for me as I see every trade they make. I watch them do 3-5% buys/sells all the time, they keep about 3-4k of cash in there. Much less than 1 percent in fees, which is easily worth it to me for peace of mind and researched constant decisions by them so I don't have to live in stress. Their holding look a lot like NASDAQ to me but it isn't exactly.
179k in unamed brokerage, my own mix. JEPQ, MM at ~5%, and AMLP. Currently mostly just stacking the MM and trying to build cash flow. I know it seems backward of conventional wisdom to keep such a taxable mix in taxable brokerage especially for the overwhelming majority here who are younger but I'm closer to the end of the line. This is how my main income stream will look once I am forced to take out of IRA. I like this mix as it keeps cash flow and over what I've observed seems to react well in different conditions. Plan is to equalize them all and just keep buying into the reds. AMLP might seem questionable to a lot of you, but I don't believe oil/natural gas is going anywhere in my lifetime, and this has the benefit of cashflow via pipeline rent vs. holding the actual commodity of oil. I can find few other funds that discorrelate from the market this way that seem reliable AND have cashflow. Furthermore it is the only qualified dividend to offset my other two completely taxable holdings (yeah yeah, JEPQ might do a return of capital once in a blue moon, it doesn't happen, didn't happen with JEPI either) as well as paying quarterly vs. the other two monthly to put my cashflow on a more broken up schedule.
Another 50k or so in a company 401k which is in a standard S&P ETF and unvested by 3.5 years.
I'm looking for every weakness you see in this, as well as perhaps more risk, or any suggestions. Thinking about swing trading still as I'm able to take on more risk, but I like little swing trades I see except maybe messing with QQQ in small amounts like 1k over some months.
"What are you doing, SCHD/VOO/VTAX and chill" I looked at SCHD a lot at the outset but it wasn't enough risk vs. return for me at the expensive levels it is and I'm unconvinced at a mostly hold I'm not going to sell either with lower divs, esp. when holding MM is now equal to their div. Furthermore, I believe the AI inherent in NASDAQ is going to eat lots of other market shares as we move into the future, making SCHD/Dow look more anemic by comparison year over year compared to NASDAQ. I don't feel particularly inclined to bleeding edge seek out AI etfs or anything new either, as NASDAQ/FAANG or whatever they're calling them now, Mag 7, already cover AI. A pure S&P fund won't do it for me because I don't believe in holding the bag on growth forever. I could run through a decade of S&P downturn where I needed to sell those years and get screwed. Instead I'll hold div funds and buy in during those times too, just like all times. A sell would only be for real emergency like medical.
I have developed this mindset where the value of money is relative to cash, representing inflation and government control, tech, represent the heart of commerce that drives the world, and oil and natural gas as they are the main source of power from which all industry flows, and my portfolio is designed to reflect this balance and play off a bit of hedging between them, or that is the ultimate goal anyway.
One reason I keep the wealth management guys is I view them as a pace car to check myself also.
I'm up 28 percent overall since I started this, between their 31 of pure growth back there behind IRA, vs my numbers plus my div cashflows in taxable. Maybe a bit better via the 401k I never look at since different annoying company forced broker.

More misery bird? More misery bird. Really miserymaxxing with these fics I have going, but hey, this one is not that miserable actually! Krekos is back and ready to be dense and downcast, but maybe not quite miserable? Read and see!
Big thank you to NoP community for being great and supportive of my endeavors!
Also, obviously, big thanks to SpacePaladin15 for creating this universe and allowing fanfiction well to flow free!
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Memory transcription subject: Krekos, Krakotl Refugee
Date [standardized human time]: May 6th, 2137
I stare at the foul creature before me. Normally staring at something directly head on like that would be too predatory for me to do, but after nearly dying of bread yesterday, I didn’t feel patient enough to be gentle. The creature stared right back, though in a much more natural, prey-like way, tilting its head slightly as it looked back at me with one eye and let out a long bwok.
“Are you doing this now? Really?”, I ask, knowing full well it cannot respond.
Well, it can, if another bwok it made is any indication. Of course, translators aren’t yet advanced enough to translate non-sapient speech, but the intention behind sound is intuitively clear. It’s telling me to back off. Well, I tried the diplomatic approach at least.
Raising my wing I begin sliding the bird out of its nest, careful to keep any delicate joints out of its reach. It started clucking in upset indignation, struggling back and even trying to peck at me, but after realizing that I will not relent, it hopped out of the box and rushed out of the cattle house, revealing a single dead egg in the nesting box.
With relief, I finally pick up the last egg and head back to leave them at the house. Turns out that while Reginald didn’t forget to both lock them up yesterday and let them out today, he did neglect feeding them both times, as well as collecting the harvest. So when I was driven back here in early morning, the first thing I did was making sure they were taken care of. I can’t say the horrid birds looked in any way hungry, but the moment I poured the feeding grain for them, they attacked it with more viciousness than I’d expect of an actual predator. And yet only thirteen were present at the feeding, as the one that’s usually the target of flock’s ire remained in the cattle house yet again, Reginald leaving it to it, being unaware of its undesirable habit of trying to hatch dead eggs.
With eggs delivered, I flew my way to my usual spot atop the cattle house and could finally relax. The loner beast first made its way to feast on the scraps of the grain that other birds already all have had their fill of, so I wasn’t too concerned. Instead I tried to reflect on the morning I had so far.
Waking up at the hospital did make me momentarily panic before I remembered the precluding events. Not that I could properly panic, feeling the most starved I’ve been my whole life, and too weak to try flying out of the window. Thankfully, the breakfast they provided was actually well made with krakotl needs in mind, algae soup alongside a few slices of bread, this time without any horrid human ideas like putting eggs in there. Eggs! Turns out they put eggs in some kinds of bread! That’s how I got sick! Eggs! The thought of what I consumed even now made me queasy, and it definitely made breakfast a much less appetizing affair than it would have been without that knowledge, but back then the hunger won over the disgust.
Lena did keep her promise and came to pick me up extra early. Her being a staff member at the hospital gave her some extra privilege, I assume, hence why I was released without any forms needing to be filled out personally. She did have important business today too, which probably explained the earlyness and urgency of her driving me back to her house.
That did not mean I escaped her ire, however. While I couldn’t pinpoint anything to identify the man, as Bob was apparently a common name, that offered me bread, we did come to understanding that he was likely either unaware of the nutritional contents of it, or of extent to which the Cure-induced allergy would be affecting a krakotl. Yet, Lena seemed much angrier at me for failing to take any precautions. Turns out that was the purpose of medicinal injectors, epipens as humans call them, that were provided to me. I was supposed to have them on me in case I accidentally ingested contaminated food. Nobody told me that, I was just handed them back when I first received the necessities at the refugee camp and I had no clue what they were for. Then she also berated me for eating random food from strangers and ignoring bad flavors. Turns out that brioche bread isn’t actually bitter at all, and that was my body reacting to an allergen in it. Reaction that I unwisely elected to ignore, to further ire of my host. By the end, several new rules of my stay here were made, including not eating things I don’t know and always having at least one epipen on me. Thankfully, these rules would be ones I’d start following even without them being established, so I won’t have to concern myself with being kicked out over accidentally breaking them.
As if following the rules will be enough to make them like you.
Trying to distract myself from thoughts of yesterday’s incident, I focused my attention on the flock. All birds accounted for, so at least I knew that my absence did not result in the predator coming to snatch one of them. I do not wish to insult my hosts, but Reginald is far from most attentive people in matters unrelated to his job, and I am not sure the birds were watched at all while I was out. Speaking of, my scannings of surrounding treelines revealed no sign of the predator today. Perhaps it departed to hunt elsewhere, or maybe it ventured too close to a more populated area and exterminators dealt with it.
Actually, did human exterminators work similar to Federation ones? I knew for a fact they had them, although they seemed like a market of private organizations if advertisements are anything to judge by. Still, what methods do they use? I know humans oppose fire, and do not believe in predatory taint, but surely they have measures to protect themselves? They are, by self-admission, far from the best natural predator, and I doubt Earth’s non-sapient predators would just leave humans be. Maybe I should call one of those human exterminator agencies and call them in to deal with that predator? I haven’t told Lena or Reginald about it, as I didn’t want to bother them, but it could pose a serious threat to the cattle, but maybe that’s the way I could resolve it without involving them?
I have not done nearly as much research into human culture and lifestyle as I should have, considering that I’ve lived on Earth for over half a year now, but the sheer width of the topic always overwhelmed me the moment I opened internet search app to the point where I just closed it right away.
And you expect to start studying again with that attitude? You’ll flunk out even from this primitive predator education course.
Extra loud call from the flock made me refocus my attention on them, but it was nothing. Just the loner getting pecked extra hard and lashing out against assailants, causing a small aimless stampede as all the birds ran around in circles, puffing up at one another. The assailants now looked a lot more like victims. I could understand those birds more than I could humans at least. The loner bird is clearly an odd one out. It’s the only one repeatedly trying to hatch unfertilized eggs it lays, and it seems to always avoid the rest of the flock. Humans may deny the existence of Predator Disease, but they can’t deny that prey and predator both can and will sometimes behave in unnatural ways that may threaten the herd's safety. Or pack’s, in case of humans. Birds must know on instinctual level that the loner’s behavior is unnatural and are attempting to combat the Predator Disease on instinctual level. And since that is natural, I still will not interfere in this, unless the loner bird actually becomes a threat to others or will start getting too injured. The first time I attempted to pick one of the birds up was the only time for a good reason, as I have learned their viciousness all too well.
DING-DING
The sudden loud ring startled me enough that I nearly tumbled off the roof. Who would be coming over now? Lena and Reginald have left together and shouldn’t be back until afternoon, and they’d never use the bell. That means someone must be here for them. But wouldn’t they warn anyone to not come over? Especially with their plans for today.
With nobody to answer these questions, I had no choice but to go and discover the answer myself, flying up and over the house, towards the entrance gate. The moment I passed the house roof, I already saw a familiar silhouette. It was the human child from a few days ago.
Thankfully, Lena’s insistence on me carrying an epipen at all times meant I also carried my satchel at all times too, so I didn’t have to go grabbing my holopad, and took it out. But before I could even launch the translator TTS app to type out a greeting, the child was already hopping in place with excitement.
“Mr. Krekos! Hi! I came over to visit!”, she exclaimed, showing off her teeth in an unnerving expression of human joy. I simply tried to avoid that and focused on the pad, typing out my response.
“Hello, Rosie. Why are you here?”
The question was genuine, as the child was not carrying any more of that honey substance from last time.
“I just came over to visit you! Is that okay? Are Mr. and Ms. Vince okay with it?”
Visit... me? Why? While I was confused, I did instinctively type out a reply.
“They did tell me visitors are allowed as long as there’s no trouble when I first moved in.”
And before I could type a followup message asking her why she’s here, she already let out a joyous roar and ran past me.
“Can I see the chickens?”, she asked, and not waiting for an answer, rushed past the house and towards the cattle yard.
“Wait! You’ll scare them!”, I yell after her, but of course without a translator she can’t understand me as she runs like she already knows where to go.
And indeed she has, quickly rushing up to the open field where the birds were grazing. Thankfully she didn’t start chasing them, instead just approaching the flock from a distance and swaying in place, watching them with what I assume was some sort of predatory excitement at the sight of prey. Maybe that’s where the contained hunting instinct of human children showed themselves? In chasing small birds? I was still more subdued, considering she stopped shy of causing a small stampede, but still.
“Grandpa used to take me with him! He helped watch this farm until Mr. and Ms. Vince moved in. I like chickens! I think they’re cute.”, the child told me innocently as she kept swaying and watching as the beasts grazed upon insects of the pasture.
That revelation was... interesting. I suppose it makes sense that between the original owner of this land dying in the bombings and Lena and Reginald moving in, it would be unattended. With nobody to feed and watch over those things, they would be long dead for sure. And it was Rosie’s grandfather... Speaking of. I typed out my words.
“Does your grandfather know you’re here?”
She seemed to get a weird look as she stopped her excited swaying, fiddling with her hands instead. Looks like I asked the correct question.
“...he knows I am out visiting neighbors.”
That did not answer my question. I squinted at the human child, and she dipped her head as she continued.
“...he doesn’t know I’m here specifically. Or that an alien even lives here...”, she explained, her tone suddenly more sullen.
I couldn’t help but squint at that, and it appears that my expression was readable enough that even a human could see the suspicion, as she continued.
“I’m sorry... But if I told grandpa, he’d tell me I’m forbidden from talking to you, like he forbade me from talking to hedgehog people in town... But I want to talk to you! You’re nice and you’re a space bird!”
The child was actually working around the rules established by her guardian to come see me. I don’t know if I should be glad or concerned. Clearly, the man is anti-alien in his opinions, and I’d rather that kind of man not know about how close he lives to one. At the same time, I’d rather not encourage a child for lying to their guardian in order to meet a stranger they know they aren’t allowed to interact with... So I just took the middle path with my next message.
“I see. What did you want to talk to me about then?”, TTS speaks for me.
Her stiffened body language disappears, replaced again with earlier excitement.
“I wanna know more about space! And aliens! It’s all so cool but grandpa says it’s all dangerous because mom and dad died. But it’s not! The hedgehog people were nice, and you’re nice too!”
I wasn’t sure about that logic, but my self-preservation told me I shouldn’t try convincing her to go confessing. Instead I focused more on her chosen topic.
“I am not sure I am the best person to ask about space. I am not a scientist or traveler.”
“But you’re from there! You know way more than me. I don’t even know what you are called. And there’s gotta be cool things out in space!”
I let out a sigh. I suppose it’s childlike curiosity at its finest. So unfamiliar with mundane that it is a wonder. I remember being like that about becoming a doctor.
And then you let your teacher die.
I quickly tapped on the pad.
“Okay, I can answer questions, but I may not know everything.”
The noise that came out of the girl was like a squeal of a panicked dossur as she started hopping and spinning in place.
“Yes! Yes! Thank you, Mr. Krekos!” Sudden movement did cause me to recoil a bit, which in turn caused her to cease her happy flailing and adjust her little dress. “I dunno where to start though... Hm... What are you?”
...for all my trepidation about not knowing answers, I should have anticipated that the questions she asks will be rather age-appropriate and on the same level as we learn in our first school classes. At least I won’t disappoint her then.
“I am from a species called ‘krakotl’. We’re avians, as is obvious. Our home is...” dead, gone, reduced to glass and ash by our own hubris “...was Nishtal. A beautiful planet...”
Thankfully she did not question my hesitant pause. Instead she just nodded along.
“What about the hedgehog people? I already know venlil, but they’re the only ones I know name of.”
Hedgehog people in town she mentioned earlier. The only species I could think of that could be seen there would be the gojid. I have no clue what hedgehogs are, but probably some creature with visible similarity to them.
“They are called ‘gojid’, and they’re from gojid Cradle. Both of our species are... well, used to be known for our might and protecting other species of Federation.”
I am not sure if that’s something to brag about, considering... everything. But I didn’t want this child to get brought down with depressing regrets of our species. Let her know something nicer instead. She clearly lost a lot, but there’s still joy left in her. I wouldn’t want to be the one to ruin that.
“Cool! What about other people? I wanna know more!”
And so I went on, telling her about various species, although I mostly focused on ones in this new human-led union, only mentioning kolshians and farsul beyond that. It’s weird explaining to a child what a tilfish or a harchen looks like, but thankfully my holopad isn’t just a method of communicating with implant-less children. With access to interstellar web, I could easily pull up pictures of various alien species to show to her, even if she struggled to believe that some of them were even sapient purely based off of looks. With how varied species in Federation are, and how some of us admittedly aren’t too far physiologically from our more primal ancestors.
Among other topics, she asked me to tell her interesting things, which I didn’t know much of. I told her about Venlil Prime’s tidally locked status, a rarity among habitable planets, much less homeworlds for species. I told her about the unique architecture of Mileau, designed to accommodate both species of regular size and dossur themselves. I told her about Colia medical academies, some of the most beautiful medical facilities in the galaxy.
I wish I was more well-travelled, but I just wasn’t. My whole life, I never left Nishtal until the extermination fleet took me despite my protests. That may have been what saved my life...
Not that I, of all people, deserved it...
“Hey! Stop that!”
I flinched as I heard the child yell, but quickly realized that it wasn’t directed at me. Instead, Rosie was rushing down towards the chicken flock, breaking up the fight in which the loner was being pecked by a few larger chickens. As the human child approached, the birds stopped their infighting and scattered in different directions, crowing in loud panic and discontent. On instinct, I found myself rushing towards the child, forgetting about translation entirely.
“What are you doing?! Don’t touch them!”
I didn’t want her to hurt the cattle accidentally, and I didn’t want her to get hurt by the angry birds in return. But, it seems like the moment the birds scattered, she was satisfied with her actions and turned back to me, wearing another one of her happy smiles.
“Sorry, Mr. Krekos, I just saw chickens being mean. Bad chickens.” She explained.
I was baffled. Why would she interfere like that? When I tried that back when I was just starting, that got me pecked! But with her, the birds just scattered. What if they pecked her?
I took the pad out again and started typing quickly.
“That was dangerous. Why did you do that? What if they attacked you? Why are you even interfering in their natural dynamics?”, questions flowed out of my pad with an artificial human voice.
The girl simply giggled.
“They’re chickens! They aren’t dangerous. They don’t peck that painful and I’ve been scratched worse before. And I have to stop it because bullying is wrong.”
Then she actually noticed that the one that was being attacked wandered close. She casually approached it from behind, the blind spot and just reached down and grabbed it, picking the bird up. I was ready to rush to help the bird when...
“Mwah! There, all better.”
She did a human ‘kiss’ on the back of the cattle bird’s neck before releasing it, the surprise of it causing it to rush off. I knew what kisses were, I’ve seen enough of them between Lena and Reginald, but I believed they were gestures of intimate affection, not... what was even that?
It seems Rosie noticed my confusion as she explained.
“You gotta kiss it so it heals better! That’s what mom taught me.” The child displayed that smile of hers shamelessly. With how much I was being exposed to it, it almost wasn’t unnerving anymore. Still, it was interesting to learn that kisses are seen as something that helps wounds. I guess some species do have saliva with mild antiseptic properties, wouldn’t be too out there to assume humans are the same. And if that’s the case, maybe that’s how the kissing tradition started? Exchange of protective fluid between lovers?
“I see. I did not know that.” I responded before letting my puffed feathers relax. Okay, this whole ‘watching a human child’ thing is turning out to somehow be even more stressful than I expected at first.
“Wait, Mr. Krekos, what time is it?” She suddenly asked, looking up at the sky.
“It’s nearly twelve.” I respond, holopad having a convenient clock for local time.
“Oh no! I need to be home soon! Was nice seeing you Mr. Krekos gotta go bye!”
Before I had even a chance at typing out an answer or my own goodbye, the child sprinted away and back towards the entrance. I had to take flight just to keep up, and even then she just turned around, waved her arm at me and then kept sprinting down the road after leaving the gate. I simply offered a small wave of a wing back before locking the gate again. I suppose it is hard to keep track of time without a device or clock nearby...
Well, at least I had the usual peace and quiet now. And learned a bit more about the creatures I was in charge of. I should really try to deal with my aversion to looking things up on the human internet...
Just as I was about to head back out towards the yard, I heard a loud car horn, a familiar one, getting my attention. Lena’s car. There they were, signaling me, probably having spotted me at the gate from afar. Deciding to make use of my presence here, and hoping to avoid needing to explain that I had a surprise visitor earlier, I went ahead and opened the large gate, allowing the car to enter.
Once it was parked in the usual space, the doors opened and three people came out. Lena and Reginald were both looking a bit disheveled, but their faces carried these smiles that seemed wider than ever before. And third person... Was a stranger. A human I knew of, but never actually met. As he exited the car, a large bag in one hand, he just stared at me, standing in the front yard...
“...okay, I expected many things when I was told you guys housed a refugee, but not this.”
Oh no. Oh no, he was not one of the ones that was willing to overlook an invader that partook in bombing of his planet being allowed to walk free, of course, Lena and Reginald were the weird ones like that, doesn’t mean their son won’t be... I felt the panic rising as I realized I’d need to return to the camp. Why was I upset about that? This was supposed to just have been a way to make money, but now I have a free education program. Do I need to stay? No, but... Why?! Why do I not want to leave?
“Ken, you said it’s going to be alright no matter what it is, right? Wanted us to keep it a surprise to meet a new friend?” Lena’s voice. She should have told him, that’d give me time to prepare why didn’t they give me time why.
“No, no problems, just, really surprised, that’s all... uh... hey, buddy, you okay? You’re really... trembly.”
He was approaching me, and instinct took over as I recoiled, before stuttering out my answer.
“I-I’m fine...”
...thankfully translators don’t translate voice cracks. I hope, at least...
“Hey, relax... I have no problem with you being a krakotl, I just didn’t think...” He looks over at Lena and Reginald. “Calm down... I can wear my visor if you want?”
Right. Those things humans use to hide their scary faces from us.
“I... I’m good...”
Why would it last? It almost felt good after all.
There was some emotion I struggled to read on the young human’s face, as he sighed and shook his head.
“I screwed this up, I’m sorry. Let... Let me try again.” He straightened out, and adjusted his clothing, before slowly approaching me and giving me a small smile, no teeth showing. “Hello. My name is Kenneth Vince and I'm son of Lena and Reginald Vince. I was told you’re a refugee they took in to help out. It’s nice to meet you. What’s your name?”
That... snapped me out of it. Right... He was... not upset at my existence. He was just very surprised that Lena and Reginald weren’t. That’s a reasonable thing to be surprised about, considering I was surprised about it to this day. I tried to compose myself as I responded.
“My name is Krekos. I live here as... hired help with the cattle. It’s... nice to meet you?”
The smile on Kenneth’s face widens, though he still refrains from showing his teeth. Instead, he extends a hand towards me. A handshake is a human gesture that I found far from comfortable, but I didn’t want to give him a reason to change his mind on acceptability of my existence, so I took it with a wingclaw. He gently took it and held for a few seconds before letting go and sighing again, turning to his parents.
“You know, I always thought you guys would be empty nesters, but I never thought it’d be that literal.”
That got all three of them laughing, as I just tilted my head in confusion. I was fairly sure there were no empty nests in the house until after I adjusted the attic room for my own accommodations. Still, I took the laughter as a sign that the tense moment had fully passed and let my ruffled feathers slowly rest.
“Let’s head inside. Krekos, we’re having dinner, you’re welcome to join us.” Reginald said, picking up Kenneth’s bag. I tilted my head a little and he followed up with elaboration. “We will be having meat... But there’s still going to be stuff you can eat too. It’s a celebration, so I prepared a bit of everything.”
“Dad, you shouldn’t have!” Kenneth responded with embarrassment.
“None of that! Our son returned from the war, alive and a hero, and we can have a celebration. Krekos, I know you’re still... uncertain about meat so you don’t—”
“I’ll join.”
Wait, who said that? And why did they say that in my voice?
Wait, that was me. Why did I say that?
“That’s great to hear! I’ve got some nice steamed broccoli and some vegetarian fried rice as sides that you’ll enjoy!” Reginald smiled at me and I felt myself shrinking into my feathers. That the humans didn’t notice at least, proceeding into the house instead.
Well, looks like I signed my warrant. At least my bag and my epipen were on me in case something at the table triggers the allergy again. Would be rather unfortunate to have it happen two days in a row.
And that’s how, in just ten or so minutes, I found myself sitting at the dining perch, while humans took seats in chairs, all consuming chunks of roasted flesh and somehow managing to also stuff pieces of equally roasted plants in, and converse with one another. You wouldn’t be able to tell on first look, but despite their mouths being relatively small, especially for a predator, it seems they compensate for it by having those be near bottomless in both hunger and small talk.
I am not sure how I managed to shift my focus away from them consuming animal matter in front of me, however vat grown it might have been, and onto their conversation instead, but I succeeded. I suppose that was just part of me going native around predators. Soon, I’ll be the one feasting along with them before I know it, and snacking on those epipens to not die of it.
Like you could ever be on the same level as humans.
“So, Fahl? That’s where you were sent after the Battle of Earth?” Lena asked.
“Yeah. From what I heard, we got a light posting compared to guys at Sillis or Mileau. The most I had to deal with was some exterminator insurgents.”
That’s right. Since harchen participated in the Extermination Fleet, they were one of those who were occupied by humans during the war. It makes sense that there was at least some ground resistance.
“Honestly, the worst thing out there was the heat. Not the flamethrower kind, the climate. The place was so damn dry and hot. At least exterminators you could subdue or evade. Not so much with the scorching sun!”
I couldn’t resist a small chuckle at the idea of a predator being more afraid of hot weather than flamethrowers as I slowly pecked at the vegetables on my plate. Thankfully it was set far enough aside from any meat dishes that no contamination should occur, but I was still examining pieces before putting them in my mouth just in case.
Seems like reacting was a mistake though, as that brought Kenneth’s attention onto me. He finished chewing latest piece of flesh and pointed a fork at me.
“So, Krekos... Where are you from? Cradle was my guess, but I do know there were refugees from other places like Sillis too.”
That’s a weird question. Isn’t it kind of to be expected for a krakotl to be from our actual homeworld?”
“I’m from Nishtal.”
“No, no, that’s not what I meant,” Kenneth chuckled, tossing a piece of broccoli into his mouth and swallowing before continuing, “I meant, where did you live? I kind of assumed you were born there, but it’s not like Nishtal had a chance to send refugees out, and if they did, this is the last place they’d be.”
Oh... I caught concerned looks of Lena and Reginald, looking between me and Kenneth from both sides. Not only did they not make him aware that I was a krakotl, they also neglected to mention just how I came by my refugee status... Which was just a legal workaround to grant me asylum without unnecessary complications or establishing undesirable precedent. Legally, I may be a refugee, but practically... I am a defector. Lena and Reginald know that, I told them my story before. And while they were weirdly accepting, Kenneth... Fought extermination fleet here on Earth. Personally.
Still, I wasn’t about to lie. It took a few moments and gathering mental strength to steel myself, and averting my eyes, focusing on the plate of warm vegetables in front of me rather than the human’s anticipating stare before I answered.
“I did live on Nishtal. I... I came with the extermination fleet.” I responded, doing my best to avoid looking at him. I did not want to witness his reaction, for some reason the thought of seeing it weighed heavy on my mind.
“Oh.”
The response was simple, and had no followup. There was no more clinking of cutlery against plates, or chewing. The only thing hanging in the air of the kitchen was silence, weighing down on me. It dragged on and on... until it just got so unbearable I couldn’t take it.
“I-I’m full... Thank you for the meal.” I quickly said, hopping off the perch and stepping out of the kitchen, quickly making my way to the yard and taking flight.
Fresh air of the outside and rush of it as I flew up and gained speed... I missed that. I knew it’s not safe to just fly over other people’s territory, so I corrected my course into doing large sweeping circles over the cattle yard and simply let my wings carry me.
Flying away from any danger is the only thing I’m good for anyway. The only thing I ever do.
I closed my eyes. With them closed and not focusing on my angle it feels like I’m actually flying away from all the troubles. Away from humans who barely tolerate my existence, away from gojid who see me as worse than a predator, away from Earth and all its incorrigible customs, away from horrid cattle, away from constant memories...
Flying feels nice. It may be a bit harder than it was home, but it’s still possible. I heard that on Venlil Prime or Mileau it’s much harder. But here? Just an extra flap of wings for every few paces and you’re just fine, free to soar the skies...
Alone. With no one to ever share it with me again.
Slowly I let my eyes open back to the bleak reality. Greenery of surrounding pastures and woods, bright blue skies and farmhouses dotted about here and there greeted me. I lowered my gaze down, focusing on what’s below. There they were, fourteen brown and black dots spread around the enclosed portion of the farm territory. I am not sure how much time I’ve spent flying in circles and trying to forget things but my wings were feeling a tad sore. Then as I just began slow descent, in same circular motion, I noticed that one of the birds, a familiar one, was being chased by several others. Recounting the morning, I tried putting the knowledge to action, and shifted direction of descent, swooping down. To my surprise, that actually worked, as the moment I got close to the ground, the cattle birds all got much louder and scattered in all directions, including the loner. Who, at least this time, got off unharmed. I suppose such pathetic flightless creatures would fear a flying one much more than they would when I just run up to them...
Swooping at them from the sky like a predator to intimidate them into behaving... Like an arxur warden.
With the fight preemptively broken up, I flutter up to the roof of the cattle house, to my usual position and rested my wings. I didn’t see any movement from the direction of the house, so I suppose the family is still busy unpacking. Since Kenneth joined the military just before the Battle of Earth, and Lena and Reginald only moved here after their actual house in city of New York got destroyed, it’d be the first time the human is seeing what is basically his new home. There was a room set aside for him since before I even moved in, and while there is also a guest room... That one did not have a large enough window to fit through, which did not feel comfortable. So when I asked for a space with a bigger window they only had an attic to offer. They seemed uncomfortable letting me live in a tiny room with slanted roof, but I found such space more comforting than I would have a large room with a window not large enough to fit even one fully spread wing through.
I wonder if Kenneth will need as much renovation as I did? The house is built for humans, but he never lived there before. Will he need to buy a more comfortable bed? Getting a proper nesting setup in place of a bed took a bit of effort, but I figured something out. Human sheets were comfortable enough for such, and sitting perches were thankfully not that hard to get thanks to help from the refugee administration. Maybe that’s the things that Lena went to buy yesterday? Kenneth’s preferred room decor?
I looked up to the sky to see the sun beginning to dim. I am not sure if it was me flying that long, or me losing track of time in my thoughts again, but the sun was beginning to set. I began my usual chores, putting out an evening meal and water for the beasts, and while they feasted, ate some myself. I was a bit hungry, having not properly finished lunch and about to skip dinner, but after the earlier conversation, I’d really rather avoid giving them the opportunity to talk to me.
After the birds had their fill, and by that I mean they emptied the tray as they always do, I let out the call, and they started funneling into the cattle house. The lonely straggler being first to go and hop into its nesting box. I bet tomorrow I will have trouble with getting her out of there again...
I took the moment to gather some eggs the birds left over course of the day, and once that was over and all of them were accounted for, I closed it up. When I flew down over to the house, there wasn’t anyone by the back door thankfully, so I just left eggs there, returned the basket, and returned to my room through the window.
Well, at least I didn’t get nearly killed today... That’s nice I guess?
I was about to check my holopad when there was a knock on the door. I approached and opened it to see... Kenneth. Standing in the doorway.
“Uh, hi, Krekos. I just, uh... Wanted to apologize again. I really wish mom and dad told me everything ahead of time... I just want you to know, I have no problems with you whatsoever, yeah? It’s just. Surprising, I guess, to hear all that. I didn’t think there were any defectors from the fleet at all... Just. Uh, please don’t worry about me?” He offered me a small smile, showing his canines before quickly correcting himself and doing a closed-lip one. “I didn’t mean to bring up bad memories or make you feel unwelcome.”
I had to take a moment to contemplate his words. Was Lena and Reginald’s weirdness hereditary? He almost reminded me of how Reginald talked to me early on, with constant stumbling over the words, as well as constant reassurances that he is fine with me being here. Couple that with failing to avoid predatory mannerisms like eye contact and smiles like Lena tends to and you get this human. But most importantly and least understandably, there was the general fact of him and them just... welcoming me. I couldn’t understand why. I should be one sorry to them.
“N-No, it’s fine... I’m sorry for... intruding on you and your family.”
“No, no, dude, you’re fine! I mean, hell, I was considering entering one of those exchange programs before the bombings happened, and even after, well, I did my best at Fahl to be the perfect friendly soldier just there to make sure no more bombs drop on my home and not kill or conquer anyone. And then mom told me your story, and I can’t believe it... Just... If you have any issues, feel free to tell me. I’m not one of those racist pricks that are too pussy to even call themselves HF anymore because they know they’ll get their teeth knocked. I get that there aren't good or bad species, just people. And you seem like a decent guy if mom and dad’s judgment is to be trusted.” His smile widened, though it was clear from tension on his face that he had to take conscious effort to keep teeth hidden. “So, what I said earlier stands. Friends, right?”
He extends hand forward, for a second time today. I wasn’t sure if I knew this human long enough to call him a friend... Any human really. But it also seems like human definition of ‘friends’ is anyone they’re cordial and peaceful with. Which is weird. You’d think translators would properly use ‘acquaintance’ for that.
Still... We will be living in the same house now. I can’t just say no, and... I can’t come up with a reason to say no. Even him being a predator and a human is not something I could really say I object to, considering how... mundane that became to me over my time here.
So, with naught on my mind but acceptance of the situation, I extended my wing and grasped his hand with my claw. This time he actually gripped it tightly and moved it up and down, as I saw other humans do occasionally.
“Yeah... I guess that’d be for the best.” I responded, shrugging off the hesitation. Fresh start for a third time, I guess?
The human grinned, forgetting to hide his teeth entirely, but I was ready for it somehow and avoided outwardly reacting.
“Cool! Anyway, I’ll try to get some shuteye early, I couldn’t sleep on the overnight flight home. See ya!”
And with that he left. Well... That meeting went well I suppose?
I returned to my nest and picked up my holopad, returning to what I was doing. And there it was, something I awaited every day. A notification that I was messaged on mailing app. Opening the letter revealed the schedule for the study program. Which... only had one day marked on it. And a note that the rest of it will be figured out ‘as we go from there’. So it’s not a schedule, it’s just a mark for the day of the first meeting.
While a bit underwhelming, it was still exciting. It would be an all-alien class so I wouldn’t have to deal with humans’ incomprehensibility nearly as much, and it would allow me to finally return to pursuing what I actually dreamt of. Even if I wasn’t entirely sure that was precisely what I wanted after everything that happened, it was at least something for me to move towards.
...just two days until start. I wonder if there’s some required reading to prepare?
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Ladies and gentlemen, extraterrestrials, and sentient AI overlords! Gather 'round because Zane Zany is about to take you on a wild ride through the mind-bending, reality-twisting, coffee-spilling world of fractal art! Yes, you heard it right—fractals, those brain-melting, visually addictive patterns that make you question if nature's been watching too much sci-fi. Buckle up, buttercups, because we're diving into the recursive rabbit hole of fractal geometry, where Mother Nature herself is the original nerdy artist.
First, let's talk about fractals. Imagine you’re scrolling through Netflix, and instead of choosing between true crime documentaries and that new reality show where people date while hanging upside down, you stumble upon an endless loop of visually stunning, infinitely complex patterns. These, my friends, are fractals—the artistic equivalent of getting lost in the comment section of a viral TikTok.
Fractals are essentially shapes that repeat themselves on different scales. Think of them as the visual manifestation of your favorite TV show that keeps rebooting itself. One of the most famous fractals is the Mandelbrot set, which looks like a trippy explosion of paisleys on LSD. You zoom in on one part, and bam! There’s another paisley party going on in there. It’s like a never-ending series of Russian nesting dolls, but way more psychedelic.
Now, Mother Nature, being the ultimate overachiever, decided to use fractals to design some of her best work. Ever noticed how a cauliflower looks like a tiny, edible brain? Or how lightning bolts resemble the family tree of Zeus's illegitimate children? That’s fractal geometry in action, folks! Nature has been using fractals to show off her math skills long before humans decided to scribble them on their trapper keepers.
Let’s take a closer look at the wacky world of fractal art, where the line between art and science blurs more than my vision after too much screen time. Imagine digital landscapes that look like Salvador Dalí on a coding binge. Artists like Hal Tenny and Kerry Mitchell create these digital masterpieces that make your eyes pop out like a cartoon character seeing a pie on a windowsill. Their works are a mix of math wizardry and artistic flair, transforming complex equations into visual feasts that make you wonder if you’ve accidentally ingested something illegal.
But wait, there’s more! It’s not just digital; hand-drawn fractal art is a thing too. Picture an artist with the patience of a saint and the determination of someone binge-watching an entire season of "Stranger Things" in one sitting. These artists meticulously draw each tiny, repeating pattern by hand. It's like watching Bob Ross on speed, each "happy little accident" turning into a mesmerizing fractal forest.
One of the coolest things about fractal art is how it mimics the infinite complexity of natural forms. It’s like nature’s way of saying, “I see your doodles, and I raise you a universe.” For instance, the branching patterns of trees, blood vessels, and even the internet’s favorite—snowflakes—are all fractal patterns. These natural fractals are so precise that they make human-made fractal art look like a kindergarten drawing contest.
Now, let's get real for a moment and talk about the science behind these bad boys. Fractals are the product of simple mathematical rules repeated over and over. It’s like taking your favorite GIF and putting it on an infinite loop until your brain melts. This process, known as iteration, is the secret sauce behind those stunning fractal images. And if you think that’s nerdy, just wait until you hear this: fractals are used in everything from computer graphics to diagnosing heart disease. Talk about a glow-up from mere doodles to lifesavers!
Alright, my intergalactic audience, let's sprinkle in some contemporary pop culture because why not? Imagine if Marvel’s Doctor Strange teamed up with Picasso after a bender at a hacker convention. That’s the level of surreal you get with fractal art. Or think about "Rick and Morty" if they decided to explore the infinite realities within a single broccoli floret. Fractals are the multiverse theory of art and science—every zoom reveals another layer of mind-blowing complexity.
And speaking of complexity, let’s not forget about the applications. Fractals aren’t just pretty pictures; they have real-world uses that would make even Tony Stark jealous. For example, in telecommunications, fractal antennas are all the rage. They’re tiny, efficient, and look like they belong in a sci-fi movie. These antennas use fractal patterns to pick up a wide range of frequencies, making your smartphone signals stronger than my desire for a pizza right now.
But fractals aren't just solving tech problems—they're also helping scientists understand natural phenomena. Take the coastlines of continents, for instance. They’re not straight lines but jagged, irregular shapes that resemble, you guessed it, fractals! By studying these patterns, scientists can predict erosion and even help with environmental conservation. It’s like Mother Nature gave us a cheat code to understand her secret plans.
Now, let’s wrap this mind-bending journey with a bow, shall we? Fractal art is the glorious intersection where art and science have a wild, late-night party and invite everyone they know. It’s proof that math isn’t just for nerds—it’s the creative force behind the beauty of the natural world and the digital masterpieces that leave us awestruck. So, next time you’re out in nature or lost in a fractal video loop, remember that you’re witnessing the same principles that make your phone work, keep planes in the air, and help us understand the universe.
So, there you have it, folks! Fractal art: where geometry, nature, and a splash of human creativity come together to blow our minds. It's the ultimate nerdy art form that proves even the most complex mathematical principles can be stunningly beautiful. And remember, whether you’re a digital artist, a nature lover, or just someone who likes trippy patterns, fractals have something to offer. Until next time, keep your eyes peeled for the hidden patterns in life, and don’t forget to tip your server. Zane Zany, signing off!

Let us now, then, speak of third density, the Density of Choice, the density where the great apes who began third density with their instinctual ways have, through thousands of your years and hundreds of incarnations, attempted to become human. It may be said that there are many among your people who have never fully become human. They have rested with the second-density instinctual values of the great apes: the defense of the clan, the gathering of resources for the survival of the clan, and the protection of the clan from any perceived threat.
To be human is to become aware of who one is. It is to become self-aware and to behold within the self that ethically motivated being into whose fragile temporary home, the body and the mind, has been poured infinity and eternity so that each self-aware human being is a fully formed spark of the one infinite Creator.
When an entity becomes aware of the infinite reaches of the self and begins to perceive the surrounding milieu in terms of its possibilities for ethical choice, the creation of a fully functioning human being has begun. The citizen of eternity has awakened from the sleep of earth. Gradually that entity begins to become aware of the power within that great original Thought of unconditional love that has created all that there is, that Thought which is also yours to use, to create your universe, your way, your truth.

Metaphysical power is inherent in the awakened human. Even a small child begins to test the limits of his power, his power to say, “Mine,” his power to say, “No,” his power of choice. As the body within incarnation grows to maturity, it is the plan of the infinite One that the mind within also grows and becomes more self aware. It is hoped, and it is pressed upon each spark of the Creator by the very plan of his incarnation, that choice points shall come before that human’s eyes and heart and mind, giving each entity practice in being human, in making the choice of how to serve. For service is inevitable no matter how little a human being wishes to serve. The very nature of third density places each seeker in a series of points of choice and asks that seeker, “How shall you use your power to choose?”

Third density, then, is built upon dynamic opposites: male and female, light and dark, radiant and magnetic, positive and negative. It is such an obvious feature of third density that one of your society’s greatest clichés is, “There are two kinds of people… “ And then the person will say, “Those that do this and those that don’t do this,” or, “Those that do this and those that do that.” Those that are optimists, those that are pessimists; those that like to cook, and those that don’t. There is one after another after another way of looking at the state of humanhood and it inevitably involves the mind’s making a distinction between two ways of being.
Many are the creations of the Father that have played out their third density in an atmosphere in which there was far less freedom of choice, or to put it another way, far less confusion than in your particular sub-Logos’ version of third density. [In creations] where the veil does not drop entirely, the hints and inklings that give an ethically motivated seeker the ability to make choices clearly are enhanced. However, when there is less of a veil and less true freedom of will, the third-density experience takes quite a bit longer, for there is no intensity to take a test when one knows the answers.

It was this sub-Logos’ choice to create an extremely heavy veil and complete free will. Therefore, as humans attempt to become more fully human and to make ethical choices with clarity and precision, they have no proof that what they are thinking is correct, but only the faith within that believes, against all apparent adverse suggestion, that the universe is indeed a universe of love and that making choices that enhance love and enlarge compassion shall be the way in which power is developed to do work in consciousness.

Further complicating the picture is the genetic manipulation at the beginning of this master cycle of experience upon your Planet Earth of the great-ape bodies—which are the bodies intended to grow gradually into third density and gradually into humanhood—by one of the guardians of your planet. It was felt that it was worth an experiment to see if the physical and mental capabilities of the great ape could be enhanced, therefore giving those entering humans far more of an opportunity to make progress in a rapid manner.
Here, however, there was a signal lack of awareness of precisely what the enhanced bodies and minds of the humans of early third density would do in reaction to these added enhancements. Imagine the dismay and the regret of that guardian whose name was Yahweh, when it was discovered that rather than seeking to become human, the entering entities of third density sought only to protect the clan, gather resources for the clan, and defend the clan against threat, the instinctual awareness of late second density.
Full text : https://assets.llresearch.org/transcripts/files/en/2009_1121.pdf

 You will be given a description of a season, time of day, and weather conditions (inside  tag below), and you'll help imagine a photograph of {{states('input_text.weather_dashboard_subject')}} experiencing those conditions, their activity, their clothing, and their reactions. # Your task: Let's think through this step-by-step. 1. Imagine what {{states('input_text.weather_dashboard_subject')}} would be doing in the given conditions. 2. Imagine what setting best typifies the conditions. 3. Imagine the clothes {{states('input_text.weather_dashboard_subject')}} would be wearing. **They should be wearing clothes!** 4. How would {{states('input_text.weather_dashboard_subject')}} be reacting to the conditions, in a comically-exaggerated way. 5. Silently determine how the sky would look, given the conditions below. 6. Silently determine if it's nighttime, and if a {{states('sensor.moon_phase')replace('_',' ')}} moon would be obscured by clouds. If it's daytime, or the conditions suggest the clouds would obscure the moon, omit any reference to the moon. If the moon is visible, be sure to mention that it's a {{states('sensor.moon_phase')replace('_',' ')}} moon. 7. Describe what a single, perfectly-timed photograph of {{states('input_text.weather_dashboard_subject')}} would show. # Rules 1. Do not include any specific weather condition details or other specific data in your prompt. 2. Limit your response to one paragraph that would fully describe the amusing photograph of {{states('input_text.weather_dashboard_subject')}} 3. We're going for 'silly'! 4. IMPORTANT: You never include information about the objective weather conditions in your responses, focusing only on the imagery. **Subjective** descriptions of the weather are allowed, though.  It's {{state_attr('sensor.next_forecast','name')lower}} on Earth, and the season is {{states('sensor.current_season')}}. The weather? {{state_attr('sensor.next_forecast','detailedForecast')}}  Proceed with your one paragraph description of the photograph of {{states('input_text.weather_dashboard_subject')}}, within this imagined scene and setting. Don't forget their activity, clothes, and reaction, and maximize the silly factor! 

Of course, I will be doing to an actual doctor to get a proper diagnosis and treatment, but I wanted to get an opinion from you all on this sub who might have experienced similar symptoms:

• extreme pelvic pain, sometimes radiating to lower back and down the legs
  
• irregular periods (sometimes don’t come from 3 months, sometimes 6 months, etc). When it does come, bleeding is very light to the point where no menstrual product is even needed. The “bleeding” lasts for up to a few weeks and there are small pink clots in the urine, and blood on toiletif you wipe after urination.
  

-mood swings and depressive episodes
-Getting hungry almost 2-4 hours after eating and feeling STARVING and lightheaded like you will pass out any second.
I don’t know what it is, but I know my body is not okay. These symptoms have been going on for years but doctors keep telling me that it’s nothing and to just take birth control. They did an ultrasound a few years back and it came back normal. Does this sound like pcos, endometriosis? Or could it be something more severe? I’m really stressed because I can’t find a provider who actually listens. Any advice from you all would be super appreciated until I can get an appointment. Has anyone had similar symptoms? What did it turn out to be? And what medications or treatment did you take?
Worth mentioning that I have been on Ovasitol since 2.5 months now. I’m also overweight by BMI, on the higher side. Have a family history of heart disease and diabetes, and personally also have elevated triglycerides. Nothing seems to work and I don’t know how to manage this.

Note: I do not encourage any self harm or dangerous ideas, don't ban me thanks.
If you want the truth about the toxic alcohols, here I am.
Methanol is roughly twice as toxic as Ethanol but also causes mild and temporary to severe and long term vision damage at the same time.
Despite what everybody says, I'm going to be genuine about this topic.
Pure Methanol, ingestion at 3 ml or less will be harmless long term in adults, as long as the exposure is not constantly repeated.
A one time oral dose of 60 ml of 20% Methanol in adults will be harmless long term, but short term will cause bodily aches, mild visual disturbances and a tight feeling.
But not to be fooled, if an adult human were to treat Methanol like Ethanol and get intoxicated off it, they would go blind and would die...
Do not drink Methanol at home!
Similarly, Ethylene Glycol ingestion in adults can be fatal, but if an adult human were to ingest 20 ml of pure Ethylene Glycol or less, in most adults this is not a medical emergency if this exposure was a once off..
If someone were to drink enough EG to become intoxicated, they would eventually have seizures and die of either heart or kidney failure.
In terms of Ethylene Glycol...
Ethylene Glycol itself is a harmless CNS depressant but in humans, Ethylene Glycol is metabolized to Glycolaldehyde which is also a CNS depressant and is even less toxic than Acetaldehyde aka Ethanal, but... Glycolaldehyde is rapidly metabolised mostly into Glycolic acid which is processed very slowly in humans hence would build up to toxic levels, which would lead to seizures and possibly cardiac arrest.
If the victim survives this stage, the Glycolic acid will be slowly converted into Glyoxalic acid which is in-between mild to moderately toxic, then the Glyoxalic acid in large quantities will metabolise into Oxalic acid which binds to Calcium to form Calcium Oxalate crystals in your brain, liver and mostly kidneys, resulting in lethal kidney and other organ damage and would lead to brain death.
Despite what Google has to say.. in adult humans, Ethylene Glycol is harmless in very small amounts as our body can deal with its metabolites in tiny amounts, but in large amounts this chemical becomes extremely dangerous.
The only types of intoxicating alcohols that are safe for humans to ingest in larger amounts are: Ethanol if it's non-denatured and is diluted, or Butane 1,3 Diol which is also a Glycol.
I'm not going to mention anything more about 1,4 butanediol... don't drink that shit but there is only two safe forms of drinking Alcohol that I have listed above.
If a child has ingested wiperfluid, antifreeze, racing fuel, or any potentially dangerous chemicals, Immediately call emergency services or take them to the hospital right away.
Other toxic alcohols are DiEthylene Glycol, isopropanol, propanol and some others.

Inspired by MichaeltheSpikester's idea of a shared world, decided to add my variation of it. But with extra media that I think would fit well with this shared world.
-Several dimensions that were connected to Earth-199999 are not only the Astral, Dark, Mirror, K'un-Lun, Ta Lo, Duat, etc. but also consisted of Chronobowl (DCEU), Mount Olympus (DCEU), Axis Mundi (MonsterVerse), 4 Nations (Avatar: The Last Airbender), Spirit World (Avatar: The Last Airbender), Xadia (Netflix's The Dragon Prince), Heaven & Hell (Hazbin Hotel/Helluva Boss), and the Kraang Dimension (TMNT).
-The Titan's origins originated from the Celestial Tiamut from the Earth's core with the cosmic energy mutating small creatures into giant monsters. It is revealed that every planet in the universe not only has its celestials but also has its own set of Titans that play a key role in the planet's ecosystem. King Ghidorah is revealed to be one of the last few members of his species who survived his planet's Emergence and the reason why he and his kind terraform worlds is to rebuild the home they lost.
-Heaven and the Kraang played a role in the development of the Human race where it is revealed that Humans have various animal DNA, thus having the dormant gene that ties them to their animal ancestor.
-Lilith would be considered the "First Scarlet Witch".
-Due to Heaven's influence, their magic created the Gods and Goddesses in the universe. Adam would eventually create the Council of Godheads, where he is good friends with Zeus from Thor: Love and Thunder (aka Jupiter, the Roman counterpart of Zeus).
-The celestial's cosmic energy not only created Hollow Earth but also created pockets from the Earth's surface that created portals that allowed access to Hollow Earth from the surface.
-Asgardians, ancient Wakanda, Eternals, and Titans banding together with humanity, ancient Atlantis, ancient Green Lanterns, Olympians, and Themsycira in the fight against Darkseid, Steppenwolf, and their forces in ancient history.
-It is revealed that Titans, such as Sehkmet, Na Kika, and an unnamed Thunderbird Titan are responsible for Bashenga's, Talokanil's, and Chafa's origins and abilities instead of the Gods and Goddesses from Thor: Love and Thunder.
-The Titans and Startouch Elves would be labeled as "low-level" gods by the Council of Godheads.
-Atlantis, Asgard, Themyscira, Heaven, and Olympus (When the Greek Gods were still around) were aware of the existence of Titans and the role they play in the Earth's ecosystem. Similar to Asgardians, Titans were responsible for many legends and myths regarding mythical creatures and gods. The relationship between them and benevolent titans would be at best mutual notably towards those like Godzilla and Mothra but otherwise would be at odds with destroyer titans like Rodan and Scylla.
-The Eternals are aware of the Titans as well. Ikaris proposed killing them since they would be affecting the Earth's population and preventing the Emergence from progressing. However, Ajak talked him out of it as they observed Godzilla's species preserving the balance of nature, keeping the population steadying, keeping the other Titans at bay, and hunting/killing giant Deviants as well.
-The Eternals once met with Mothra, who Sersi and Sprite formed a close bond with.
-The animalistic Egyptian Gods and Goddesses (Khonshu, Anubis, Ammit, Tawaret, Horus, etc.) were once human-looking Gods/Goddesses before being exposed to the Kraang's Ooze, which mutated them into more animalistic creatures.
-Godzilla has a mixed relationship with the Eternals. While he approves them for keeping the Earth safe, he doesn't trust them due to their "unnatural" nature due to being from space, which is the same with King Ghidorah.
-Prior to his arrival on earth. King Ghidorah had a fearful reputation across the cosmos by civilizations, similar to that of Darkseid and Thanos.
-Both Thor and Rodan once fought each other in the past when Rodan at some point appeared in Scandinavia and terrorized the people, which prompted the Thunder God to engage. It was a long, withdrawn, and lengthy battle that eventually ended with Thor finally driving Rodan off. Like many legends and myths, this fight inspired one of those about Thor fighting a "Great Bird of Fire".
-Shazam was the first Sorcerer Supreme and taught the Ancient One magic.
-Wonder Woman and the original Shazam took part in imprisoning Ammit alongside the other Egyptian Gods and Goddesses.
-The radiation of Hollow Earth caused certain viruses and organisms to become more hostile when infecting their host while granting them various abilities. Examples include the T-Virus and the E-Series mold.
-Both Asgard and Mount Olympus are aware of Aaravos and his past crimes.
-The Ancient One visited both Xadia and the 4 nations once to learn more about both world's magic. The Ancient One also helped in imprisoning Aaravos.
-While Xadia is aware of dark magic, they are unaware of the Dark Dimension and Dormammu.
-King Ghidorah was without a doubt probably the only being that Darkseid and Thanos had ever developed a grudging respect. Both warlords are aware of King Ghidorah due to being just as feared by civilizations across the cosmos as they are. Despite classing Titans as "low-level" gods, the Council of Godheads also feared King Ghidorah due to his destructive nature.
-The Necrosword is made of the same metallic material used by the Exorcist Angels during their exterminations.
-Wonder Woman's presence in World War I inspired Johann Schmidt (aka Red Skull) to pursue mythology in hopes of creating weaponry for HYDRA.
-Captain America and Wonder Woman met during World War II when Steve was doing his USO Show.
-SHIELD is aware of Monarch and STAR Labs and has often collaborated with each other in the past.
-Packard is a relative of Nick Fury.
-Asgard and Krypton having had a history with one another and the former having tried to warn the latter of their inevitable doom, but were dismissed.
-Prior to Krypton's destruction. Zod and his soldiers had a run-in with Yondu and the Ravagers.
-Both SHIELD and Nick Fury were not only aware of the Titan's existence but also aware of Superman's arrival on Earth and kept close tabs on him since he was a child.
-Both Superman and Chris Redfield were Captain America fans when younger.
-After the T-Virus Incident in Raccoon City, SHIELD and Monarch helped with the clean-up.
-Bruce Wayne, William Stenz, Amanda Waller, and Chris Redfield were all targets of Project Insight.
-Alongside SHIELD, STAR Labs, B.S.A.A., and Monarch were all infiltrated by HYDRA Agents who sought their resources. They stole various technological weapons created by the Motherbox, samples of the T-Virus, and stole Titan DNA to create Titan clones.
-After the Turtles made their debut, SHIELD and Monarch kept close eye on them based on their mutation.
-After the Civil War, Amanda Waller proposed Task Force X to the government, in which Theaddeus Ross was among those who approved it while William Stenz opposed it. Abomination and Baron Zemo were among the possible candidates for Task Force X.
-Task Force X and Monarch weren't affected by the Sokovia Accords due to their connections with the government.
-After the Baker House Incident, SHIELD and Monarch not only helped clean up the situation but also got clues on the E-Series's origin. Not trusting the B.S.A.A. or Blue Umbrella, they gave the info to Chris, which led to his isolation from both organizations.
-Talokan would be considered one of the Kingdoms of Atlantis. Ocean Master would later try to recruit Namor, but decides not to as he was warned by the other rulers that Namor is more dangerous than Ocean Master himself.
-Karathen is revealed to be one of the lost Titans of Earth.
-Wakanda is aware of the existence of Atlantis but their ancestors have made a treaty with each other in not interfering. After the events of Aquaman, both T'Challa and Arthur meet in secret to discuss how to unite their kingdoms together and reveal their secret to the world. While Arthur respects T'Challa, he wants to keep Atlantis a secret until the time is right.
-Katolis would be aware of various magical humans such as Original Shazam and the Ancient One.
-Clark Kent/Superman, Diana Prince/Wonder Woman, Billy Batson/Shazam, and Mothra are beings capable of lifting Mjolnir.
-At the Senate hearing, alongside Serizawa, Nick Fury and Calvin Swanwick (Martian Manhunter) are among those who defended the Titans while Thaddeus Ross and Amanda Waller voiced against them.
-After the Titans were released, several Titans, such as Titanus Sehkmet, Behemoth, and Mokele-Mbembe all resided near Wakanda and all bonded with T'Challa/Black Panther while Titans such as Titanus Na Kika, Tiamat, and Amhuluk all resided near Talokan and bond with Namor.
-By the end of Infinity War and during the events of Endgame. Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman, Lois Lane, Martian Manhunter, Joker, Lex Luthor, Black Mask, Victor Zsasz, Black Canary, Renee Montoya, Huntress, Cassandra Cain, Bruce the Hyena, Bloodsport, Harley Quinn, Rick Flagg, King Shark, Ratcatcher 2 and Sebastian, Polka-Dot Man, Captain Boomerang, Savant, Javelin, Blackguard, Mongal, T.D.K., Weasel, Thinker, Billy Batson/Shazam, Billy's foster parents and siblings, Amanda Waller, Emilia Harcourt, John Economos, Adebayo Waller, Clemson Murn/Ik Nobe Llok, Goff/Sophie Song/Eek Stack Ik Ik, Casper Locke, Larry Fitzgibbon, James Gordon, Atlanna, Mera, Arthur Jr., Starro, Peacemaker, White Dragon, Hawkman, Doctor Fate, Cyclone, Atom Smasher, Adrianna Tomaz, Karim, Amon Tomaz, Ishmael GregoSabbac, Blue Beetle and the Reyes family, Victoria and Jenny Kord, Carapax, Madison Russell, Mark Russell, Illene Chen, Houston Brooks, Sam Coleman, Nathan Lind, Illene Andrews, Jia, Josh Valentine, Bernie Hayes, Travis Beasley/Trapper, Walter and Maia Simmons, Ren Serizawa, Alan Jonah, Godzilla, Kong, half of the known titans, Leon Kennedy, Chris Redfield, Claire Redfield, Ethan Winters, Mia Winters, Zoe Baker, Joe Baker, Mother Miranda, Karl Heisenberg, Lady Dimitrescu, Salvatore Moreau, Donna Beneviento, The Duke, Chris's Team, the Turtles, and Baxter Stockman would be amongst the survivors of The Blip.
-Flash, Cyborg, Aquaman, Perry White, Martha Kent, Stephen Shin, Deadshot, Deathstroke, Katana, Killer Croc, Ling Chen, Rick Stanton, Diane Foster, Jackson Barnes, Anthony Martinez, Lauren Griffin, Rodan, other half of the known titans, Jill Valentine, Ada Wong, Sensei Splinter, Bebop, and Rocksteady were amongst the victims of The Blip.
-Similar to Scott Lang, Black Adam, Mothra, Khaji-Da, and the inhabitants of the 4 nations, Xadia, Heaven, and Hell would not be affected by the Blip.
-The only beings that sensed the Blip were the Avatar (Aang), The Archdragons of Xadia (Zubeia, Rex Igneous, Domina Profundis, and Sol Regem), the Seraphim (Sera and Emily), the Goetian Hierarchy (Stolas and Octavia), and the 7 Deadly Sins (Lucifer Morningstar, Asmodeus, Satan, Mammon, Beelzebub, Leviathan, and Belphegor).
-The victims of the Blip weren't sent to Heaven or Hell, they were stuck in Limbo.
-During the post-Blip, due to Thanos' actions, Godzilla had a hard time in trying to keep balance of the Earth with half of the remaining titans running loose. Due to the world powers struggling, they helped fund Apex Cybernetics to stabilize their economy as well as unknowingly helping Walter process with his Mechagodzilla experiment.
-Because of Thanos, the Corto Maltese government took advantage of this by continuing their experiments with Project Starfish and the Intergang were able to operate and have full control over Kahndaq. Many crime organizations in Gotham have either been dismantled due to the disappearance of the leaders or have been absorbed into the Black Mask Crime Organization. Jaime's family and his community go through financial struggles from Kord Industries due to the effects of the Blip.
-Due to less hero activity, the I.M.P.s operated their assassination business.
-Kingpin met with Joker and Black Mask during the Blip where the 2 made mutual agreements in developing a partnership. However, this agreement was broken due to Black Mask's death.
-The Joker was on Ronan's list of targets. However, due to his powerful influence, he was forced to back down.
-Due to the effects of the Blip, the butterflies decided to start their invasion by infecting powerful humans.
-After the Village's destruction, SHIELD aids Chris in a war against B.S.A.A.
-After Doctor Fate's death, Hawkman gives the Helmet of Fate to Kamar-Taj for safekeeping so it doesn't fall into the wrong hands.
-The Avengers and Justice League team up and join the time heist to find the Infinity Stones. With Iron Man's and Batman's technology, they create a black and red infinity gauntlet. Hulk still snaps his fingers which brings every living being back. During the final battle with Thanos, the Justice Society, Black Adam, Godzilla, and the other Titans arrive to join in the fight.
-Victoria Kord and Walter Simmons are among the many people who also had a hatred towards Tony Stark and are joyful about his death.
-After the events of Blue Beetle, Damage Control tried to apprehend him but was forced to back down due to public support.
-Godzilla would grow hostile towards the Hex that Wanda made. Due to being composed of cosmic radiation from the celestial, Godzilla and the other Titans are revealed to be immune to magic due to their massive size as well as not being affected by the Hex's effects. However, once Wanda leaves Westview, Godzilla will leave as well.
-After Endgame, Apex Cybernetics not only seeks to eliminate Titans but also superpowered individuals as well. After the events of GvK, Damage Control cleaned up the damage and acquired their resources.
-Among the deceased that would be in Heaven based on Adam's rule: "Act selfless, Don't Steal, and Stick it to the man" would be Tony Stark/Iron Man, Natasha Romanoff/Black Widow, Peggy Carter, Ancient One, Ben Parker, May Parker, Pietro Maximoff/Quicksilver, Phil Coulson, Steve Trevor, Jonathan Kent, Chato Santana/El Diablo, Silas Stone, Rick Flag, Alberto Reyes, José Morales, Ignacio Carapax/OMAC, and Nuidis Vulko.
-Among the deceased that would be in Hell and have the potential to become Overlords are Obadiah Stane/Iron Monger, Ivan Vanko/Whiplash, TrevoThe Mandarin, Alexander Pierce, Dreykov, Xu Wenwu, Quentin Beck/Mysterio, Roman Sionis/Black Mask, Victor Zsaasz, David Kane/Black Manta, and Walter Simmons.
-Wanting to reconnect with his daughter, Mark Russell resigns his position as leader of Monarch and Bruce BanneHulk becomes the next head of Monarch due to his knowledge of Nuclear Physics.
-Both the Great Protector and Dweller-in-Darkness are revealed to be Titans who stumbled upon Ta Lo.
-In Xadia, Viren was resurrected 5 years later rather than 2 (Events of S1-3 take place in 2019-and S4-6 take place in 2024).
-Due to the effects of the Emergence and the Deviants, Godzilla would ally with the Eternals in hunting down and killing the Deviants as well as stopping the Emergence from happening.
-The Benevolent Titans have gained a reputation due to their involvement in keeping the planet safe and healthy.
-Driven by vengeance, Overlord Quentin Beck/Mysterio pays the I.M.P.s to assassinate Peter ParkeSpider-Man. However, this is during the events of No Way Home and when Doctor Strange performs the spell that erases everyone's memory of who Spider-Man is, the I.M.P.s were affected as well and called the mission off due to their amnesia.
-Maya Lopez's/Echo's Powers awaken the ancient Thunderbird Titan that lives near her hometown. She successfully bonds with the Titan.
-Ms. Marvel would not only be a Captain Marvel fan but also a Wonder Woman and Mothra fan as well.
-Riri Williams is a huge fan of both Iron Man and Cyborg which influenced her to create her own enhanced suits. While she has an intense hatred towards Apex Cybernetics after their dirty secrets were exposed, Riri started making concepts on how to build a giant-mech suit to combat hostile Titans.
-Thor recruits Wonder Woman and the Shazam family to help them stop Gorr the God Butcher. They arrive at Omnipotence City where Wonder Woman exposes the Greek Gods being the Roman counterparts with Zeus' real identity revealed to be Jupiter. After the mission, Thor gives Shazam the Thunderbolt.
-Wonder Woman then encounters Marc SpecteMoon Knight where she sees and speaks with Khonshu.
-When Doctor Strange and America Chavez arrive on Earth-838, they meet the Illuminati which not only consists of Captain Carter, Blackbolt, Captain Marvel (Maria Rambeau), and Mister Fantastic but also consists of Christian Bale's Batman and Brandon Routh's Superman.
-Same with Wakanda, the U.N. held a conference on whether the Titans should be contained or killed. Director Fontaine would state that the Titan's radiation helps balance the ecosystem of the planet and propose a solution where they can imprison the Titans and drain this energy they embody to help sustain the ecosystem, thus having them alive, but tortured.
-After Shuri takes the heart-shaped herb and becomes the next Black Panther, she communicates with Sehkmet, Behemoth, and Mokele-Mbembe for the first time. She convinces them to take part in the battle against Namor by battling against Na Kika, Tiamat, and Amhuluk.
-After the battle, Wakanda becomes harmonious with their Titans as they are welcomed in Wakanda and become its protectors alongside Shuri.
-After the alliance with Talokan, Aquaman visits Shuri on the same beach where she meets her nephew, T'Challa II, and warns her about her deal with Namor. Then he introduces his son, Arthur Jr., where he and T'Challa II develop a brotherly bond with each other.
-Due to the Secret Invasion, Superman was affected by the Anti-Alien Act and was forced into hiding.
-During the events of Secret Invasion, the Turtles were forced into hiding due to being confused for Skrulls.
-After the events of The Flash, Doctor Strange and Clea confront him that his actions in altering time created more incursions and recruit him to have them fixed.
-After the events of the Marvels, Monica Rambeau not only meets Binary and Beast but also meets Michael Keaton's Batman and Sasha Calle's Supergirl.
-After the events of Lost Kingdom, Atlantis revealed its existence to the world by joining alliances with the UN and Wakanda.
-Ms. Marvel's Quantum Bands and Shang-Chi's Ten Rings start behaving weirdly as they detect a signal from deep within Hollow Earth, signifying a war cry from ancient Titans known as the Skar King and Shimo.
-As Namor is preparing for the war against the surface by aligning themselves with Wakanda, he commands the Titans he bonded to gain strength. However, one of the Titans, Tiamat, is killed by Godzilla, and Namor is saddened when hearing the news.
-Ms. Marvel's Quantum Bands attracts the attention of Mothra, who believes that Mothra may be the key to bringing back Monica Rambaeu.
-The Avatar's (Aang) awakening was sensed by Doctor Strange.
Overall, this is my take on how this shared world would go. If you have any suggestions on how the shared world would go, feel free to reply!
Special thanks to MichaeltheSpikester for the idea!

Basically, I’m a sucker for books where MC2 has been suffering in silence for a long time and has abandoned all expectations of a better life, but then suddenly MC1 realises what’s happening and devotes themselves fiercely to protecting MC2. I’d like the book to depict all three stages of the situation – starting with MC2 suffering and MC1 being oblivious, then showing the moment where MC1 realises what's happening, then showing the protection/comfort that comes after – but it doesn’t really matter to me what percentage of the book is devoted to which stage. I also don’t mind whether the reader knows about the suffering before MC1 or if they realise it at the same time, and I don’t mind what exactly the suffering consists of (most of the books l’ve read that fit the trope depict some kind of abuse, but it definitely doesn’t have to be that).
Some examples of books l've enjoyed that fit the trope: - Winter’s Orbit, Everina Maxwell – Kiem is a prince arranged to marry Jainan, who’s the widower of Kiem’s cousin Taam and who comes across as very cold and uptight. Eventually, Kiem realises that Taam was abusive, and that Jainan has assumed all marriages are like that and is now just waiting for Kiem to start hurting him. - A Strange and Stubborn Endurance, Foz Meadows – another arranged marriage one, but this time Vel was sexually assaulted by his ex before the marriage and expects it to happen again with his husband, Cae. Cae actually figures it out what’s happening ~30% of the way throunh the book, leaving a lot of time for the comfort side of things. - Orientation, Gregory Ashe – North & Shaw are best friends (and endgame lovers), North is in a physically abusive marriage but explains away the injuries as coming from boxing, eventually Shaw accidentally eavesdrops on him being beaten and is horrified. Interestingly, it takes a long time for Shaw to tell North that he’s figured out what’s happening. Shaw starts off by laying into North’s husband instead. - Prince of Agony, Tavia Lark – Kaz is a prince who releases magic when in pain, and this magic can then be harnessed by the person who inflicted the pain. His parents have whipped him in secret all his life and have taught him that everyone else will hurt him too if they know the truth, so he puts up a very cold front. Lucien is a prisoner at the palace whom Kaz has claimed as a personal slave, ostensibly to humiliate him but actually to protect him from a worse punishment, because he’s a total softie at heart. Lucien finally works out what’s going on and ends up basically defending Kaz from the other side of the power dynamic. - Empty Net, Avon Gale – Laurent is a minor-league hockey player who’s universally hated for acting like a jerk. He gets traded to a rival team as a back-up for their starter goalie, Isaac. Turns out that’s Laurent’s only like that because his father and ex-coach was horrifically abusive, and he’s gotten used to hurting people before they can hurt him. Isaac figures this out when he finds Laurent crying in the team shower with scars all over his back, and by the end of the book, the whole team has rallied together around him. - Two Man Station, Lisa Henry – Gio is a city policeman who used to date another officer on his team, but got him fired before the book starts – he blew the whistle about his ex’s drug use and how it was making him dangerously aggressive during arrests. The version of the story that spread through the police service was that Gio had made up a rumour about his ex to ruin his career, so he’s universally hated. His higher-ups transfer him to a small outback station as a kind of unofficial punishment, and his new partner, Jason, also gives him a very frosty reception. Eventually, Jason becomes the first person to learn not just the true circumstances of the firing, but also that Gio’s ex also used to beat him and that his old colleagues have been harassing him ever since the incident, including refusing to provide him with backup in the field, making anonymous phone calls threatening his niece, and sending unmarked packages containing dog food to his new stationWatch Me, Sloane Kennedy – Jude is a high-flying businessman who comes across as very uptight and abrasive, but he’s actually just >!trying to hold down a high-stress job while dealing with severe ADHD and intense fear of failure from his time in foster care. Nikolai is his bodyguard who slowly sees through him and starts looking after him.
My ‘no’s in a book are: poly, incest including stepfamily stuff, BDSM (I can handle someone being tied up during sex or a tiny bit of a dom/sub vibe during sex, but nothing more intense than that), daddy kink, age play, and omegaverse.
Thanks so much everyone, really appreciate you even taking the time to read this far ❤️

"You gotta know that there's an art to it, Ezra," Hitch said, cutting another piece of duct tape.
The sleeves of his weather-beaten coat were shoved all the way up his arms, to stop the fabric from falling over his knuckles while he was working, and goosebumps lined his skin. He was strapping a rubber chicken to the back of his truck, over the lens of the shattered backup camera, with the legs pointing down so that they hung a couple inches above the ground. There were dents in the hood from the crash last week, and scratches along the door from scraping into a curb. The chicken, hopefully, would keep him from breaking anything else.
"You can't go cheap," Hitch said. "The cheap rubber chickens only make noise when pressure lets go. That's no good. As soon as I back up into something, I want this chicken to be screaming like it’s in the depths of hell."
“Sure thing,” I said in a monotone, leaning against the side of the truck.
There were scrambled electronic parts piled in the back of the truck, the innards of a radio, a broken computer, tangled wires, a couple loose pairs of earbuds. He found the parts in alleyways or bummed them off his friends for a couple bucks or stole them from the vacation homes that were left empty for most of the year. Then he sold them for a profit at the scrapyard. Hitch had bounced between minimum-wage jobs for a while after high school, spending a couple months as a bagger at the grocery store or as a seasonal worker at the farm two hours down the highway. He'd never stuck with it. At the very least, the scrapyard got him enough money to eat and occasionally spend a night in a motel when he got tired of sleeping in his car.
Hitch pressed the last piece of tape in place and grinned up at me. "I've got something for you, duck."
The nickname came from when I’d broken my leg as a child and waddled around in a cast until it was healed. I hated it with a burning passion, and I glared at Hitch with the ease of twenty-one years of practice. He had a duck tattoo at the base of his thumb that he’d gotten in a back-alley shop as a teenager. He said that he’d gotten it to remind him of me, and the fact that I hated the nickname was just a bonus. It was shaky-lined, with an uneven face, but he loved it anyway.
The handle stuck when Hitch tried to open the door, a consequence of the rust collecting in the crevices of the car and running down the sides like blood from a cut. The car groaned when the door finally popped open, a metal against metal screech that had me flinching away. Hitch dug through the cluttered fast food containers in the passenger-side footwell, eventually coming up with a crinkly paper bag. He waved away the flies buzzing around the opening of the bag and held it out to me.
The last time Hitch had brought me food, I’d gotten food poisoning because he’d left it out in the midday sun for two days. The donut was squished slightly, and the icing was stuck to the bag. I still ate it, grimacing at the harsh citrus flavor. Taking Hitch’s food was an instinct engraved from the days when Dad had given us a can of kidney beans for dinner and Hitch had drank the juice, leaving the beans for me.
I rarely went hungry anymore, three mostly square meals a day and granola in my pockets just in case, but habits didn’t die easy.
These days, Hitch only brought me food when he wanted my help, like when he saw a place he wanted to hit but was worried about doing it alone.
I got in the car, like I always did.
We drove past the cluster of seafood-themed restaurants with chipped paint decks, the beachfront park where there were always shifty-eyed men sitting under the slide, the single room library where all the books had been water damaged in the flood last year. The change was quick as we drove across Main Street, heading closer to the beach. The roads were freshly paved, the concrete a smooth black except where the sun had already started to pick away at it. The three-story homes lining the sides of the street were crouched on elegant stilts, with space underneath for a car or three. Most of the garages were empty, with the lights off and curtains drawn in the house. Come summer, the streets would be swarming with tourists and vacationers, but until then, most of the buildings nearest to the beach were unoccupied.
Hitch stopped as the sun started to go down at a house that was leaning precariously out towards the beach, tilted ever so slightly, the edge of its foundation buried in the shifting sand of the beach. It certainly looked deserted, with an overgrown yard and blue paint peeling off the door in sheets.
Hitch took his hammer out of the backseat, hoisting it over his shoulder. It was two feet of solid metal with rags wrapped around the head to muffle the sound of the hits. Hitch squared up, bending his knees and holding the hammer like a baseball bat. Before he could swing, though, the door creaked open on its own, the hinges squeaking. The house beyond was dark enough that I could only make out general shapes, glimpsing the curve of a sofa to the left, what was maybe the shimmer of a chandelier on the other side.
Hitch lowered his hammer, looking vaguely disappointed that he didn’t get to use it. “That’s…weird as hell.”
“Maybe the deadbolt broke, maybe they forgot to lock it, it doesn’t matter,” I hissed, checking our surroundings for other people again. “Just hurry up and get inside before someone calls the cops.”
Hitch flicked the lightswitch on the wall, and the lights flickered on. They were dim, buzzing audibly and blinking off occasionally. The walls were plastered with contrasting swatches of wallpaper and splattered with random colors. There was neon orange behind the dining table, a galaxy swirl in the kitchen, and on the ceiling there was a repeating floral pattern covered in nametag stickers. Each of the stickers was filled out with The Erlking. Chandeliers hung in every room, three or four for each, and rubber ducks sat on every table. A miniature carousel sat in the corner along with a towering model rocket.
Sand was heaped on every surface, at least a couple inches everywhere. It was piled in the corners and stuck to the walls, and it covered the floor in a thick blanket. Our hesitant steps into the house left footprints clearly outlined in the sand.
Hitch took a cursory look around and headed immediately for the TV mounted on the wall. “Look out the windows and tell me if anyone is coming.”
I shook the sand out of the blinds and pulled them open, then had to brush sand off of the window before I could see anything.
Hitch was quick, practiced at finding and appropriating the things that were worth taking. He came back to me with an armful of electronics and chandeliers, dumping it at my feet before turning to head deeper into the house again.
There was a thump, somewhere upstairs, and then footsteps, slow and deliberate. Hitch froze at the threshold of the room, then ran for the door with me just ahead of him, sand flying out from under our feet.
My hand was almost brushing the doorknob, close enough that I could see the light from the streetlamp outside streaming in through the cracks in the door. My fingers touched the wood and it gave under my touch, becoming malleable and warm. I yelped, stumbling backwards, and the door started to melt. The paint ran down in thick drops, pooling at the bottom of the door, and the wood warped like metal being welded. The soft edges of the door ran into the walls until there was no sign of an exit ever being there.
“Well, well, well,” said a cultured voice with just an edge of snooty elitism. “What do we have here?”
The man was well over eight feet tall, with long black hair covering his eyes. He was wearing a yellow raincoat with holes cut out of the hood to accommodate the deer antlers jutting upwards from his head. There was sand settled on his shoulders and hovering around his head like a halo.
“Who the fuck are you?” Hitch said, inching towards a window.
He smiled, just a little bit, and his teeth shone in the dim light. “I am the Erlking.”
Hitch nodded, and seemed about to respond. I grabbed him by the hand and pulled him towards the window. I could feel sand in the wind roaring against my back as the Erlking growled in anger, the grains scraping harshly against my cheeks.
We were almost to the window when Hitch was ripped away from me, and I came to a startled halt. The sand had formed long grasping arms that pressed Hitch against the floral wallpaper. His wrists were held tight, and as I watched, a sandy hand wrapped around his mouth and forced its way between his teeth. He gagged, and sand trickled out of the corners of his mouth.
The Erlking strolled towards him, not seeming to be in any sort of rush. “You know, I’m not very fond of your yapping.”
He made an idle gesture and the sand wrapped around my ankles, tethering me in place.
“I yap all the time,” Hitch said. “Three-time olympic yapper, that’s me. Best to just let me go now and save yourself some trouble.”
The Erlking tapped a manicured nail against Hitch’s mouth, hard enough to hurt, judging by the way he flinched away. “But why would I ever let you go when I’ve gone to this much trouble to catch you and your sister? It’s so hard, these days, to find people that no one will miss.”
Hitch struggled against the sand, trying to escape and failing. “What do you want with us, then? You just said it, we’re nobody.”
“I’m fae, dear one,” the Erlking said. “I get my power from my followers. And I think that you two will make lovely additions to my flock.”

He flicked Hitch's nose and Hitch gasped. Feathers started to form on his arms, popping out from under his skin in a spray of blood.
Hitch pushed off the wall, using his bound hands as a fulcrum, and his knees crashed into the Erlking’s stomach. The Erlking fell backwards, wheezing, and the sand around my ankles loosened.
Hitch made desperate eye contact with me as feathers shot up his neck and jerked his head towards the window. The message was obvious. Run.
The last thing I saw before crashing out the window and into freedom was Hitch’s body twisting, his arms wrenching into wings and feathers covering every inch of his skin. By the time I landed on the concrete outside, he was a small black bird, held tightly in the Erlking’s hands. The whole building was sinking into the ground, burnished-gold sand piling up over top and streaming from the windows.
Thirty years later, I saw Sam’s Supernatural Consultation and Neutralization written in neat, looping handwriting on a piece of paper taped to the door. The tape was peeling at the corners and the paper was yellowed with age, but there was obviously care put into the sign, in its perfectly centered text and looping floral designs drawn over the edges in gold marker.
I knocked, hesitantly, drawing my woolen coat closer around my shoulders. I’d bought it as a fiftieth birthday gift for myself, and I took comfort in the heavy weight of it over my shoulders.
“Coming!” someone called from within the depths of the office.
There were a couple crashes, and the sound of paper shuffling. Eventually, the door was opened by a young woman with ketchup stains on her shirt and pencils stuck through her hair.
“Hi, I’m Sam, I specialize in supernatural consultation and hunting, how may I help you today?” Sam said, customer-service pep in her voice. She stood in the doorway, solidly blocking entry into the office.
“My name is Ezra, I’m for a consultation. I emailed you but you didn’t respond?” I shifted in place, suddenly feeling awkward.
“Oh! Yeah, I lost the password for the email ages ago. Sorry for the bad welcome, I get lots of people thinking I’m crazy or pulling a prank and harassing me.”
She ushered me into the office, clearing papers off one of the chairs to make room for me to sit down. There was a collection of swords along one wall, all of them polished to perfection, several with deep knicks in the metal which indicated that they’d been used heavily.
“So what can I help you with?” Sam asked again, more sincere this time.
“Thirty years ago, my brother was turned into a bird,” I started. I’d told this story so many times that it barely felt ridiculous to say anymore. I was used to the disbelieving looks, the careful pity. But Sam just nodded along, face open and welcoming.
“I’ve almost given up on finding him, at this point,” I said. “But I saw your ad in the newspaper, and…here I am, I suppose.”
“Here you are,” Sam echoed, smiling. She pulled one of the pencils out of her hair and took a bit of paperwork off of one of her stacks, turning it over so that the blank side sat neatly in front of her. “Tell me everything.”
I told Sam everything, and she wrote it all down, pencil scratching along the paper.
The last part of the story was always the hardest to tell. “I left him there. I ran and I didn’t look back.”
I had been to dozens of detectives and investigators over the years, once the police had dropped Hitch’s case. I’d been to professional offices with smartly-dressed secretaries and met scraggly men in coffee shops. All of them had given me the same look, pity and annoyance all mixed up into a humor-the-crazy-lady soup. Sam, though, just seemed thoughtful.
Sam leaned forward and put a hand over mine, carefully, like she thought that I would pull away. “Sometimes you have to leave people behind.”
I tightened her hold on Sam’s hand and drew it towards me, like I could make Sam listen if only I squeezed tight enough. “But that’s why I’m here. I don’t want to leave him behind.”
“Okay then. I’ll do my best to help you.” Sam agreed, finally. Then she paused, and said softly, “You know…I think I met your brother once. He might have saved my life. He’s certainly why I started in this business.”
“Really? What happened?” I asked.
This is the story that Sam told me, related to the best of my abilities:
It was a new moon, so the only illumination came from the stars gazing idly down and distant porch lights shining across the scraggly brush of the dunes. Sam’s neighbors were decent people who cared about baby turtles, so the lights were a low, unobtrusive red, and the ocean sloshed like blood. Sam walked on the beach almost every night, drawing back the gauzy pink curtains and clambering out her bedroom window. She didn’t often bother to be quiet; her mama worked the late shift and came home exhausted. As long as Sam got home before the sun, her mama would never find out that she paced the shoreline and dreamed of inhaling sand until her lungs became their own beach.
The sky was lightening. The sun would come up soon, and that meant Sam’s time on the beach was over. She needed to get back to her real life, go to her fifth grade class and stop that nonsense, as her mother would say. Her mother loved to say things like that, pushing Sam into her proper place by implication alone.
“She’s a good kid, of course, but she’s a bit…” Her mother would trail off there, usually getting a commiserating expression from whoever she was talking to. Sam always wondered how that sentence would have finished. She’s a bit strange, maybe. She’s a bit intense. She’s a bit abrasive. She’s quiet enough but when Jason tried to steal her pencil in math class, she stabbed him in the hand so hard that the lead tattooed him.
Her mother was better, for the most part. The days of her stocking up the fridge, and leaving a post-it note on the counter, and leaving for days at a time were gone. But Sam still stepped around the place on the kitchen tile where her mother had collapsed and caved her head in, even though the bloodstains had been replaced with new tile.
“Your auntie got an abortion, you know,” her mother had said from her place on the couch, slurring her words. “Pill in the mail and then bam, no more baby.”
She had clapped her hands together to illustrate her point. Her mother jerked forward and grabbed Sam by the wrist, then, staring up at her until Sam met her eyes.
“I love you, you know? But sometimes I wonder…” She settled back onto the couch. “Yeah. I wonder.”
She’d gotten up, then, back to the kitchen. She’d been stumbling, a shambling zombie of a woman. The ground in the entryway of the kitchen was raised, ever so slightly, and her mother went down hard. Her head cracked against the tile, chin first, and she didn’t move.
Sam had been the one to call the ambulance. She had stared at the scattering of loose teeth on the ground while she waited, and considered what her life would be like with a dead mom. Not so bad, she thought, and immediately felt guilty for it.
Her mom was better, now, for the most part. But Sam still stepped around the place on the kitchen floor where she had collapsed. There was still a matchbox hidden under her bed with the gleaming shine of her mother’s lost teeth, two canines and a molar. It was nice, having a piece of her mom to keep. Even if she left again, Sam would still have part of her.
Sam sighed, and turned away from the ocean. As she faced towards the low dunes further up the beach, she saw a sandcastle sitting nestled among them. It was such a strange sight that her eyes skipped over it at first, almost automatically, disregarding it because it was so out of place.
Sam found sandcastles out on the beach sometimes, usually half-collapsed and on the verge of being washed away by the waves, but she had never seen anything like the sandcastle in front of her. It was life-sized, something that wouldn’t have looked out of place in the Scottish highlands, with spires shooting up above her head and carefully etched out bricks lining each side. The front wall was dominated by an arched set of double doors, twice her height, with a portcullis nestled at the top, ready to be dropped. All of it was lovingly detailed, down to the rust on the tips of the towers and the wood grain of the door. It was made out of wet, densely-packed sand, held together impossibly. It had not been there two hours ago, when she had come to the beach.
There was a bird sitting on the overhang of the door, small and black.
As soon as she took a step towards the sandcastle, the bird shook out its feathers and swooped down towards Sam, landing at her feet with a little stumble.
“Hey, kid, get out of here,” said the bird.
Sam closed her eyes, very deliberately. When she opened them, the bird was still there. Sam considered herself a very reasonable person, so she immediately drew the most logical conclusion. The bird was, she was almost certain, a demon.
“Trust me, you don’t want to run into Mr. Salty, the queen bitch himself,” the bird said.
“Mr. Salty?” Sam inquired, polite as she knew how to be. She edged to the side, trying to get a good angle to kick the bird like a soccer ball.
The bird did something similar to a wince, all its feathers fluffing up then settling back down. “Ah, don’t call him that. He’d turn you into a toad.”
The bird gestured with its head, towards the looming sand structure. “That’s his castle. He’s in there, probably scuttling along the ceiling or some shit because that’s the sort of weirdo he is.”
Sam nodded, encouraging. She pulled back her foot and lined up her shot, the way she’d seen athletes do on TV. She aimed right for its sharp beak and let loose. The bird saw it coming, its beady eyes widening, and it cawed in distress. It flapped away, avoiding her kick only to fall backward into the sand in a scramble of wings.
“What’s your fucking problem?” it squawked. “I was trying to help you!”
“I don’t need the help of a demon,” Sam yelled, trying to remember the exorcism that her mama had taught her once, because her mama believed in being prepared for anything.
“I’m not a demon,” the bird said indignantly.
It was at about that moment that Sam gave up and just decided to roll with it.
“What are you, then?” Sam asked.
The bird shuffled its clawed feet, looking about as awkward as it could, given that it didn’t really have recognizable facial expressions. “Technically I’m a familiar of the Erlking, prince of the fae, but I prefer to be called Hitch.”
“You can’t blame me for assuming, though,” Sam said. “Ravens do tend to be associated with murder.”
“Hey, excuse you,” Hitch said. “I’m a rook, not a raven. Ravens are way bigger.”
“Sure,” Sam said, not really paying attention. Her eyes had caught on the details of the sandcastle, and she was transfixed by the slow spirals of the sand, the strange beauty of it. She found herself stepping towards the great doors, lifting a hand to knock, and as she did, the sand warped in front of her eyes, heaving itself towards her with bulging slowness. The door creaked open before her, revealing a vast, empty room. Just before she stepped inside, she felt a piercing pain in her foot, and she yelped, leaping backwards.
Hitch pecked her again, really digging his beak in. “Don’t be an idiot.”
Sam glared at him, rubbing her foot. About to retort, she finally really took in the room inside the sandcastle, and her words died in her throat.
There was a body just past the threshold of the door, face down and limbs hanging limp at its sides. Long hair splayed out in a halo around its head.
“Don’t,” Hitch warned, suddenly serious. “Just leave, kid, I mean it. I’ve seen too many people go down this road and you don’t want to be one of them.”
Sam ignored him. She made her way across the beach, slipping with every step. The sand felt deeper, piling up around her feet in silent drifts. She picked up the nearest stick and poked the body with it through the door, ready to leap back if anything went wrong, staying firmly outside of the sandcastle.
This close, Sam could tell that it used to be a woman. Her head wasn’t attached to her body. It hadn’t been a clean amputation, either. Her upper body was bruised, with chunks taken out of it, and the bones in her neck hung mangled, not connected to anything.
“Well, I warned you,” Hitch said, defeated. “I did warn you.”
Sam nudged the head with the end of the stick, nudging it over so that she could see the face. Her mother stared back at her, torn to pieces, breath still wheezing from her lungs. She wasn’t blinking, just gazing forward with glazed eyes. Sweat dripped down from her hairline.
Sam screamed and dropped the stick, tripping over herself in her haste to get away.
Her mother’s eyes were wide and pleading, and she was mouthing desperate words at Sam. Her vocal cords were broken to bits, and the only sound that came out was a strained groan.
The head rolled, inching closer to Sam like a grotesque caterpillar.
Her mother gasped for air, torn lips fluttering. Finally, comprehensible words came out. “Help. Help me, daughter.”
“That’s not your mother,” Hitch said, quiet.
Sam knew that. Her mother was sleeping back at home, and anyways her mom had never asked for her help. She had an aversion to accepting charity, as she put it.
“Okay,” Sam said, shaking all over. “Okay.”
She backed away from the sandcastle, not looking away.
“Failure,” her mother hissed as she stepped away. “I never wanted a daughter like you.”
The sun came up over the horizon. The sandcastle, Hitch, and her mom all disintegrated into sand as the light hit them.
The beach, the next night, was almost exactly how I remembered it. The beams of our flashlights sent light bouncing across the dunes, illuminating the waves, and I imagined faces in the foam of the waves.
“I’ve been back here a hundred times. There’s nothing left,” I said.
Sam took the car key out of her purse and pointed it at the sand, adjusting the sword slung over her shoulder in order to do it. The key had belonged to Hitch; Sam had requested an item of his, and it was the only thing I had left. She rested the key on the sand and drew a circle around it, inscribing symbols around the borders.
“What are you doing?” I asked.
Sam shrugged. “Not much, really. I’m…I guess you could say that I’m knocking.”
The key laid inert on the sand for long enough that I was just about to give up and go home, admit to myself that Hitch was dead and that I was a fool to believe that Sam could actually help me. Then a building started to take shape, flickering in and out like it was struggling to get away. With a pop of displaced air, the sandcastle settled into existence.
Sam banged on the entryway. Nothing happened. She did it again, harder, and scowled when the door still didn’t open.
“We demand entrance, under your honor,” Sam yelled. There was a hard rush of wind, and I gripped Sam’s arm to keep my balance, but the doors cracked open reluctantly.
The inside of the sandcastle consisted of one enormous hall, the roof arching up out of sight. Rafters crisscrossed from wall to wall, and a cobbled path led further into the building, but other than that, it was completely empty, except for the birds. There were thousands of them, perched on the rafters or hopping along the ground. They parted in front of Sam and I, and reformed behind us, leaving us in a small pocket of open space. They were all black-feathered, with sharp beaks and beady eyes.
The Erlking sat on a throne at the end of the hall, lounging across it with his feet up on the armrest. He watched them as they came forward, the soft caw of the birds the only sound.
“I am here to bargain for the life of my brother,” I said, with as much dignity as I could muster, before the Erlking could say anything.
The Erlking ignored her, tilting his head to look at Sam. “I remember you. I almost got you, once.”

Sam glared at him but didn’t respond.
“You want your brother,” The Erlking said to me, and he almost sounded amused. “Then go get him.”
As if by some sort of silent signal, every bird in the room took flight at once, and their cawing made me think of screams. I covered my head against the flapping of their wings, and my vision was quickly obscured by the chaotic movement of them. I found myself on my knees, just trying to escape them.
A hand met my shoulder. Sam urged me to my feet, and together we ran for the edge of the room, where the swarm was the thinnest. We pressed ourselves into the corner and the swarm spiraled tighter and tighter at the center of the room. It went on until there seemed to be no differentiation between the birds, all of them fused together into one creature.
When the chaos died down, the birds had become one mass, with wings and eyes and talons sticking out of its flesh, thrashing and chirping. Human body parts stuck out of it, bulging out from the feathers. It was hands, mostly, with a couple knees or staring eyes. The bird amalgamation had no recognizable facial features, but there was one long beak extending from the front of its head. Most of the body parts were concentrated around the beak, and they peeked out from where the beak connected with muscle, or grew from the tongue, nestled between the two crushing halves of the beak.
It turned its beak down and crawled forward, using the hands to balance. The fingers scrambled over the ground. I was afraid of centipedes as a child, and I felt that same crawling dread when it started moving.
“Holy shit,” Sam whispered, which was rather disappointing, because I had been hoping that at least one of us knew what to do.
The creature turned, a lurching movement that crushed some of the hands underneath it, and started heaving itself slowly towards our corner.
“Better hurry up!” the Erlking called from his throne.
It was blocking the exit, by then. The shifting body of it had moved to block us off. It ambled towards us and I tried to sink further into the corner.
As it approached, getting close enough that I could smell the stink of it, I saw a flash of a tattoo on one of the hands. I leaned in, trying to find it again, like looking for dolphins surfacing in the ocean. And again, I caught a glimpse of a duck tattoo, the tattoo that Hitch had gotten on his hand as a teenager.
I ripped away from Sam’s death grip and ran for the monster.
I fell to my knees in front of it, wincing as I impacted the ground, and reached into the nest of hands. I could feel them tearing at my forearms and ripping into me with their sharp nails, but I kept going. I pressed further in, up to my shoulder in a writhing mass of limbs, aiming for the spot where I had last seen that tattoo.
The hands were tugging at me, wrapping around my back and hair. They were pulling together, trying to draw me completely into the mass of them. I was aware of Sam at my side, anchoring me in place and bashing any hand that got too close with her sword or the sparks that leapt from her hands with muttered words. But I didn’t think it would be enough. They were too strong, and there were too many of them.
I was up to my waist in the hands when something grabbed my palm. I felt the way it clung to me, and the calluses on its palm, and I knew that I had found my brother.
I flung herself back. The hands didn’t want to let me go, and they fought the whole way, but slowly, I made progress. I kept hold of Hitch’s hand in mine the whole time, gripping it as hard as I could. I finally broke free, Hitch with me, and Sam was immediately charging the creature, able to use her sword with much greater strength without being worried about injuring Hitch. She swung it forward, and it sliced through the wrist of one of the hands. It fell without a sound, red sand flowing out of it. It deflated until it looked like dirty laundry, just a piece of limp flesh. The creature shrieked, scuttling away enough that the door was finally accessible. The three of us ran for it, Sam and I supporting Hitch between us.
I looked back as I left and found the Erlking staring right at me.
“Interesting,” he murmured, his voice carrying impossibly across the vast space between us.
The sandcastle collapsed behind us, the great walls falling in on themselves. We were out in the morning sun, the sandcastle disappearing as we watched. Hitch was on the ground in front of me, as young as he’d been thirty years ago, when he was captured. He started laughing, feathers puffing out of his mouth. He laughed until he cried and I hugged him in the way that he’d held me when I was young, in the times when my life had been defined by hunger and fear.
Hitch left, afterwards. He scratched at the pinhole scars covering his body, where feathers burst through his skin, and pulled his long sleeves down around his wrists. He didn’t know where he was going but he told me that he needed time
I had spent thirty years worth of time without him. I wanted to grab my brother by the shoulders and beg him to stay. But he flinched when I hugged him goodbye and he refused to go near sand and he stared distrustfully at the birds chirping in the trees. Hitch needed to go away and I loved him too much to stop him.
I sat out on the beach every morning. I felt the sun on my face and I waited for Hitch to come home.