Love my girlfriend poems

When I’m sad I lose most of my physical sensations along with fears.
Extra info: 20, m, never used to be empathetic at all but it’s improved a lot.
I go from being the most ticklish person I’ve ever known (including more ticklish than kids), to not reacting at all. I can feel that I’m being touched when I’m tickled, but my body doesn’t react or feel any kind of way about it. I go from loving physical touch from my girlfriend, it brings tingles through my entire body when she rubs just my arm etc… to not feeling any tingles or pleasure, I can tell I’m being touched but it doesn’t feel good. I usually love soft materials, but once I’m sad, these materials don’t make me feel good. My fear of the dark, suddenly vanish’s. Any physical pain, I suddenly either can’t notice or barely notice. My chest goes from feeling full, to feeling hollow like I could put my hand through it to the other side or alternatively it feels heavy, gritty and smokey with a subtle sense of adrenaline but I’m not sure. When I’m sad I can stay awake for 35 hours straight at a time, my eyes might feel like they need a rest, but staying up becomes no problem. I just want to feel again.
I’d be intriuged to see if anyone knew what this experience is often called, I can’t find anything similar online. Thanks.

As I stated in the title, I believe I know what causes male entitlement to women’s time, body or just women in general. At the very least what caused it for me, and how I (am breaking) free of it.
When I was 7, I would watch TV. There would always be an episode where a male protagonist gets a Girlfriend. Loses her to a dumb mistake. Tries to get her back, fails, tries again, and succeeds.
I’ve always been in favor of Womens Rights -er believed I was. As a little boy, nobody ever told me about love or women or relationships (especially considering I don’t have any sisters). I didn’t know how to talk to women, and I’m not attractive enough for them to come to me. But by some miracle for little me. When I was 12 going on 13, I got a girlfriend. She was the same age, let’s call her “Kelly”. I obviously cared deeply for Kelly, and I know she did for me too. I was just exploring my sexuality at the time (we’re both straight).
As we got closer together I rushed things, I would want to touch her, and she would let me. I would become focused on that. Long story short. I neglected her consent, not even intentionally. It just didn’t register to me. It didn’t occur to me because I don’t think I was subconsciously programmed to listen to Kelly, or any woman my age for that matter. So we break up and I move schools etc… but the misogyny doesn’t end there. That’s when the misogyny SURGES!
I move to another school. I was broken from the last year as it took a big toll on me. But burns stop being hot after at least a little bit. So i was ready?, for someone else. Well, I guess I was window shopping again thankfully. But this time it was different. I‘m high function autism, and it kinda? shows. But not enough that I need special classes or whatever. But regardless, I saw more attractive men, with better clothes, hygiene, social skills. They got girl’s attention. Well, they got the girls that got MY attention. Hot guys with Hot girls (what a shocker lol). But I felt angry, not at the other men. But at the girls, when I was at my worst, I saw a hot white girl with a tall lightskin dude. (I’m white male btw) And I thought to myself “of course HE gets her.” Even at my worst I rejected that kind of thinking. But that doesn’t change the fact that it came to me naturally.
I would see hot girls and internally label the h*es, sl*ts, you get the idea. Insert chudjak. I saw something on , it was a tweet that said “Nobody calls a woman a hoe more than a man who can’t fuck her”. And that’s when it hit me. I knew it was a me problem. But I just now I INTERNALIZE the idea. And I kept thinking, I‘ve heard people on TwoX talk about male entitlement. And I’ve seen places like and talk about it. I never understood what it meant to be entitled to a woman. But now I do. Think about it. I got mad at a hot white girl, who i have no connection to, with some hot dude. I had NO relations with her. But I was mad somebody else had her? I felt like a victim all along. A victim of what? Unfairness, or even injustice. But everyone get’s justice (morally). And if everyone gets it, everyone’s entitled to it, literally! So denial of my “right” to women is (from this flawed perspective) wrong to do. And logically, to resolve it. I can be given a woman.
If that sounds messed up, it”s because it is. Because when you put it like that, you seem crazy. But I never thought if it like that. And that’s why women pick up on that instantly.
So in conclusion, It’s occurred to me that young boys are taught that getting women is a right. And everyone is entitled to rights, so if you perceive women as the object of s right that you have, you (aware or unaware) will become entitled.
TLDR: Male entitlement to women stems from cultural rhetoric, and when access is denied, it sparks rage.

Love languages
Wanted to ask iyong POV/ honest perception niyo
If you’re someone na love language mo is physical touch o kaya quality time, how would you take the advances/ efforts of someone na words of affirmation naman iyong love language? Be it from your SO or someone na nag confessed pa lang sa iyo or someone na binibigay lang niya sa iyo kahit walang kayo.
My love language ever since talaga is words of affirmation. Mahilig ako gumawa ng poem, blogs, letters and even made a story and a song. Pero most of it talaga never na-aacknowledge kahit binigay ko. Kaya most of it na set aside lang and probably would never see the light of the day na.

Love languages
Wanted to ask iyong POV/ honest perception niyo
If you’re someone na love language mo is physical touch o kaya quality time, how would you take the advances/ efforts of someone na words of affirmation naman iyong love language? Be it from your SO or someone na nag confessed pa lang sa iyo or someone na binibigay lang niya sa iyo kahit walang kayo.
My love language ever since talaga is words of affirmation. Mahilig ako gumawa ng poem, blogs, letters and even made a story and a song. Pero most of it talaga never na-aacknowledge kahit binigay ko. Kaya most of it na set aside lang and probably would never see the light of the day na.

Love languages
Wanted to ask iyong POV/ honest perception niyo
If you’re someone na love language mo is physical touch o kaya quality time, how would you take the advances/ efforts of someone na words of affirmation naman iyong love language? Be it from your SO or someone na nag confessed pa lang sa iyo or someone na binibigay lang niya sa iyo kahit walang kayo.
My love language ever since talaga is words of affirmation. Mahilig ako gumawa ng poem, blogs, letters and even made a story and a song. Pero most of it talaga never na-aacknowledge kahit binigay ko. Kaya most of it na set aside lang and probably would never see the light of the day na.

I’m in a relationship with someone I live with and we have very good chemistry. We laugh and talk like we’ve known each other for years and the sex and conflict resolution are fantastic! However we have ran into several roadblocks all around the same issues of compatibility.
I enjoy physical touch and lots of it, she however is not used to it and can get overwhelmed by my need for it. I am okay and happy respecting her boundaries since I can get it from other people I date (I’m a relationship anarchist).
Another point of contention is how vocal I am with expressing love and care. She is an oldest child of neglectful parents so my saying “I love you” sweet nicknames or asking her how she’s doing feels smothering. This bothers me more than the physical touch stuff, I want to be with a person I can say I love you to and call my girlfriend. But I wonder if this is a lesson in loving someone how they want to be loved not only loving in ways that I like to give and receive love.
I am certain this relationship will not be long term but unsure if I should end it now or just enjoy the rest of our lease together. (Edit: She also is aware our relationship is short term)Any advice is welcome

Hey guys, thanks for all the help and support from my last post I really appreciate it. This past week I was able to talk more to my girlfriend and parents and that went well. My parents essentially said that they will support Me no matter what(as long as I'm not being a bum) which ever way I choose. They said I should br doing it for me and not for the validation and feelings of others and that my validation needs to come from within. That wad awesome to hear. My girlfriend was a bit harder, she is nervous about me coming home due to the inevitable judgement coming from others and its not how she imagine and hoped that it would go. I think she's holding out a little hope not that I'll figure out it's true, we both don't believe its true, but rhst something good will happen to make my time worth it.
Today I talked with my president in interviews. I tried to go in very calm and not attacking him or how he believes in any way. I explained that there are certain things about this church that I do not agree eith or believe in, he asked me to go further into detail. He's a business man and earlier in my mission we had talked about Ensign Peaks and how that is troubling for Me to learn about and how I believe that it wad fradulent. Before I could finish my sentence about ensign peaks he cut Me off and retorted that it wasn't illegal or fradulent because if it was people would be in jail. He told me that it went against regulations so in his eyes its ok for thr church to lie and deceive members and the government because it's not "breaking laws." I chose not to argue or agree eith him and we continued on with my questioning joseph smith and the book of mormon and again he cut me off to "testify" that it's true. He asked me about president Nelson and the apostles and I basically said there are some good things that has been taught but I do think there are times that he speaks as a man and teaches things as doctrine that shouldn't be. He said he's spent a lot of time with apostles and he knows that they are the mouth piece of God. I then brought up questions about policy/doctrine issues like blacks in the priesthood being taught ad doctrine, he again cut Me off and said that it wasn't taught as doctrine. About after that I clocked out and replied with ok to most of his answers. I feel very disrespected and unheard after pretty much all of my encounters with him. That'd about all of the update, still thinking about going home and I'm not sure what to do entirely. If anyone has anymore advice I'd love to hear it. Hope you all have a great day.

I keep on fantasizing what it would be like to be with a cis girl instead of my transgender girlfriend and idk how to say it without being called transphobic. I feel like ever since I discovered that I'm lesbian I've been more and more attracted to cis women and I'm feeling awful about it. I want to love and support my girlfriend but these feelings are making me feel like I'm the worst. What can I do? Has anyone else had this happen?

I've had multiple cats since 2012 (at least 40, people abandon cats at my backyard) and the one I have now is the smartest of them all. It's like he understands everything we talk about, he just can't talk, he's so expressive and egoistic.
So my cat loves being brushed. When I'm at the study table or bed, he'd come and meow at me repeatedly (it's not for food because my mom gives him whiskas, my sister gives him wet treats and my dad for playtime), it simply means I have to brush his fur or he would get angry.
When I start brushing his fur he immediately runs to his food bowl looking at me signalling me to come, if I don't, he gets so angry I feel humiliated.
So he expects to be brushed simultaneously while he eats. This has been happening ever since he's a kitten. He's a 1 year old orange and white Oriental Shorthair. Somebody abandoned him during 2022 Christmas so we named him Jingle.
He also has a girlfriend and that's the neighbours 6 month old female kitten that he visits daily. He watches her through their door for hours (4-5 hours a day) and gets angry if I take a peek at him watching her. He needs a lot of privacy while watching his girlfriend and even I feel single when I look at the way he looks at his gf. His girlfriend would get all excited at wait at their door waiting for my cat to get there.
I cannot. They're literally cats and they got such a romantic life.
I don't understand this cat, cats don't act like this! So demanding and egoistic and has a girlfriend and wants privacy??? Like what. My mother even called me the "nosey sister-in-law" because I was filming a video of my cat and his gf??? Literally wtf
I've had other cats before and they weren't like this. My sister even joked that maybe an evil witch converted a man in the form of a cat and sent him to our home to spy.

Ten years ago my ex fiancé cheated on me. I came home to them in bed together. I left, moved out & met my current husband a year later. My husband & I purchased a home, we travel often & have been living happily since. I am in love with my husband.
My ex has reached out 1-2 times a year over the last 10 years. It’s always the same thing. He states that he “messed up” & he wants me back. I always brush him off & cut it short. The last time he reached out was this February, where he stated that he hates his life & begged for forgiveness again, I told him I would never leave my husband for him & blocked him once again.
Yesterday at lunch a mutual friend informed me that my ex just announced he is expecting a baby with his long term girlfriend (not the affair partner) & that she is far enough along that they have announced the gender. I am happy for him. He always wanted children. I did not.
So why am I sad? I was the one who left. I was the one who moved on. Iv never wanted children & he’s obviously not a good person but Why do I feel heartbroken all over again? I have no desire to ever be with him again, so why do I feel this way.

TL;DR! I feel drained, sad, and unmotivated and I feel like my girlfriend is being insensitive when I told her why I feel this way, what do I do?
I just need advice and opinions from a 3rd person view.
Fyi, she has been unemployed for nearly half a year until yesterday..
So these past couple days I have been feeling drained, sad, unmotivated. Haven't been eating much, not sleeping well, showing up to work late. Maybe I'm dealing with a depression episode? Maybe I'm just overthinking and doing this to myself?
I texted my girlfriend and said we need to talk. I asked if I could tell her what's on my mind without you getting upset. She said yes, and this is what I said.
"I don't know what's going on, like if I'm just being dramatic or something is off with me but I feel like i'm not getting enough love. I feel like im always selfless and don't get the attention I need. I hardly put myself first, I usually think about everyone before me and not getting reciprocation is exhausting. I also feel like there's a lack of romance and excitement. I don't know what I can do."
She then called a few minutes later, asked if there was anything she can do. I said "I don't know, maybe read what I said and see if any of that is contradicting to what you do. Maybe come love on me? That's what I'd do."
She went off to say how she gives me hugs, kisses, scratches my back, says "I love you". I said theres more to love than just that. You do do those things but im talking about right now, not the past.
Her excuse for the no romance or excitement was she has no money. I said you don't need money to have romance or excitement. You could literally take me to a park, throw out a blanket, sit at a picnic table, eat lunch, or watch a movie/videos on our phone, or go late and just lay there and look at the stars. Her response was "Okay well I'll start taking you to the park"
I told her I feel like you're always selfish. She asked in what way. I asked her what do you do for me? When do you ask what I want to do? What I want to eat? If I want or need anything? When have you done something thoughtful for me?
She starts naming things, well last weekend I think I asked you what you wanted to do. Well that one time I made enchiladas, I asked if you wanted that or something else. Then went off about how when she asks me to go fishing, she doesn't want to, she's doing it for me. She said the other day she would've rather stayed home and relaxed in the swimming pool, but came to see me because I wanted to hangout with her.
Now here's how im thinking.. I always put her first. I always ask her what she wants, what she needs. I take care of her however she needs. I pay for all our meals. I randomly zelle her. I fill up her gas tank. I steal her car to go wash and vacuum it as a surprise. I've missed work just to be with her. I went through the hassle of calling ATT to get her phone unlocked so I can put her on my phone plan and pay her phone bill. I replaced her headlight and turn signal bulbs. Ive literally given the last few dollars i had so she could a take a 6hr trip to throw her sister a baby shower and pay for all of it, including her gas and dinner for her family. There's so much I just do, without being asked.
It turned into an argument with her getting all defensive and I feel like she was trying to make my feelings invalid instead of understanding how I feel and why. She went on to say my thought process is childish and she's tired of arguing with me. We said bye and hung up.
I just don't get it. Am I being childish? I genuinely am feeling down and just expressed that. Is she being insensitive?
What should I do?

As a little kid I was considered good looking and did a lot of modeling. By age 13 I became depressed and completely let go at a young age, turning me into the “weird kid”. I was bullied quite a bit and often called ugly. This was right around the age I started to really be interested in girls. I was massively insecure and always rejected. Even to this day I still feel like that insecure child. Regardless by high-school I started to get my looks back together and got my first girlfriend however after a few short months I was cheated on. After that relationship, I started getting lots attention from girls and I was not used to it and fell in love with the attention. I have manipulated many women and caused a lot of pain to them in order to fulfill my own selfish desires. To this day I am in love with the idea of love but I don’t know how to actually love someone or even tell if the feeling is genuine. I don’t want to hurt anyone else and I want to find something genuine but I don’t know if I deserve it after all the people I hurt. While not as bad as the things I’ve done in the past, even now I find myself on dating apps starving for attention, often ghosting most of the people after getting the attention I wanted. I don’t know how to grow as a person or what steps to take in order to forgive myself. And I don’t know how to love or be genuine…

He left because we had the worst possible fight in history (I take full blame because I took it completely too far and was super toxic during it by disrespecting his belongings and destroying 3 of his things which I will forever regret). I’ve been going to therapy and been practicing meditation to find balance in my emotions and feelings because I would never want to hold in that much anger and explode like that to anyone. After the situation he was very cold and rude to me (which is understandable) in the first few weeks and after a few attempts to talk to him have failed and he seemed very detached, I told him I am just going to have to also detach and move on from him. He ended up sending me 3-4 super long paragraphs about how I wouldn’t be saying that if he would’ve just “packed all his things and moved back” and continued to pour his heart out to me about how damaging the situation was for him. It just seemed like he was mad that I would say I would have to move forward. He definitely made me feel sick to my stomach with his messages because I feel so horrible about my actions and I seen how much he put me first and I completely let him down. That is why I started therapy so I can become a better girlfriend to him and a better person in general, I wouldn’t even do what I did to the next person if there would be one. I have never done something like that throughout our entire relationship, it was the first time. After that convo, I thanked him for expressing his genuine feelings and apologized wholeheartedly once again and he’s been nice to me ever since. I really do love him with all of my heart and I really want to remove him from his depression since he’s back in his mother’s house and I want us to move forward together from this situation. He still tells me he loves me and I just know if he moves back we would be the strongest we have ever been. 10 year relationship, he’s the only man I’ve ever been with, he’s my first in everything. I would never want to go through this again and I would never in life want him to go through this again. Fuck how I feel, it’s him that I am more concerned about. I really want to make him happy and show him that he means the world to me and I’ll do whatever I can to prove it to him every day he lives here. Would you take that leap of faith with moving back to a place where you wanted to make it a home with someone you love? Is there still hope for us?

Hey, at the beginning I want to mention that my mother language isn’t English so shame on me when I sound kinda weird… So, I’m still young and I’ve got a problem. Like u can see in the headline, I struggle with my sexuality. Since I had my first kiss in primary school, I always felt in Love with girls. I love the relationships, the feeling with being with one and I do loved the girls which I was able to call my girlfriend. However, I often realize that I also kinda like boys or men. Like I do got my homies and there is no interest bc I love them as brothers. And I do not like directly anyone I can see bc that would be weird. But somehow I get attracted to men if they are good looking or if they have a vibe that matches to mine. Also sounds kinda weird but in p0rn*s I do get attracted to dicks too and they turn me on sometimes but I hate that. I grew up with a lot of friends, mostly girls. It was just randomly bc my neighbors were girls and bc of my sis I also knew many more. I always understood them and I made good friends with some of them.
But what I want to say is: Since my last relationship my heart broke completely. I’m on a good way but the last weeks I feel like woman’s are mostly always the same. When I meet someone new, a guy for example, I always get along completely fine with them and there is nothing strange. But sometimes I do know that There are feelings for the gender and I do like some but in real life i feel disgusted when I think about sex with men’s and the ship with someone but Also it’s hart to me to think about sex with woman’s bc I really want to and I would but I’m Totally unsure or insecure idk bc I feel like I’m not good enough for anyone especially woman’s and have also the thought in my mind that I do could be attracted to men but I hate that And I don’t want to get bi or gay or smth like that. Sometimes I like gay p*rns more than one with a girl inside but I would NEVER start smth with a guy. That’s disgusting.
I hate myself for feeling so and I want to be completely hetero. I accepted, that the way of Living “gay” is NO option. Won’t change anything about it. Is there something like conversion Therapy? In my country it’s illegal lol. I want to change it. I know I can’t bc everyone says that but there is no way I can accept that. I want to be only attracted to girls and all that what comes with it. And I do love girls but it’s weird and I don’t understand. PS: idk if it helps to understand but I’m literally a therapist in my social range. I understand more problems than the problems itself but on google I only read answers to similar question like “you have to accept, otherwise u won’t be happy” but sexuality is just an interest, isn’t it? So it can be changed like interests can be changed. No matter what I have to do. There is always a way. What is wrong with me?

There’s a longer story to it but I’d rather keep it short. Girlfriend and I of 2 years recently broke up a little over a month ago. Decided that it was the best for both parties to take some space because of how stressful life was getting for us. She started being friends with a guy she met a little before we broke up. I definitely got a little jealous of this and one night decided to look through her phone. I found a couple of messages that I considered as flirting, asked her if they were talking, she said no. Assured me that those messages were not flirting. Well I let it go for the most part. Everything had been going good for us and we had still been friends Unfortunately I recently checked their messages again; messages from before the original ones where I saw them flirting and found more flirting. I don’t think anything too serious went on with them, I know for sure she had a crush and maybe he didn’t completely feel the same. When they were supposed to go hang out at times, he’d flake on her. They’d actually only known each other for about 3 weeks. But I feel like somewhere along that time, they developed an emotional connection (especially on her end) and it turned into a crush. I haven’t reacted the best to us being broken up I’d admit, but I know now that she was at least lying about not liking him. I know what I seen. I’m guessing she was trying to protect my feelings and while it was in the past, I don’t believe that I want to be with her anymore. I’ve spent so much time stressing over if something was going on and was constantly assured that it was nothing. Knowing that it probably was, I don’t want to be with her now. I love her but lately I’ve been making it a point to choose my peace over anything else. I can at least be friends with her but no dating anymore.

How do I become hetero?
Hey, at the beginning I want to mention that my mother language isn’t English so shame on me when I sound kinda weird… So, I’m still young and I’ve got a problem. Like u can see in the headline, I struggle with my sexuality. Since I had my first kiss in primary school, I always felt in Love with girls. I love the relationships, the feeling with being with one and I do loved the girls which I was able to call my girlfriend. However, I often realize that I also kinda like boys or men. Like I do got my homies and there is no interest bc I love them as brothers. And I do not like directly anyone I can see bc that would be weird. But somehow I get attracted to men if they are good looking or if they have a vibe that matches to mine. Also sounds kinda weird but in p0rn*s I do get attracted to dicks too and they turn me on sometimes but I hate that. I grew up with a lot of friends, mostly girls. It was just randomly bc my neighbors were girls and bc of my sis I also knew many more. I always understood them and I made good friends with some of them.
But what I want to say is: Since my last relationship my heart broke completely. I’m on a good way but the last weeks I feel like woman’s are mostly always the same. When I meet someone new, a guy for example, I always get along completely fine with them and there is nothing strange. But sometimes I do know that There are feelings for the gender and I do like some but in real life i feel disgusted when I think about sex with men’s and the ship with someone but Also it’s hart to me to think about sex with woman’s bc I really want to and I would but I’m Totally unsure or insecure idk bc I feel like I’m not good enough for anyone especially woman’s and have also the thought in my mind that I do could be attracted to men but I hate that And I don’t want to get bi or gay or smth like that. Sometimes I like gay p*rns more than one with a girl inside but I would NEVER start smth with a guy. That’s disgusting.
I hate myself for feeling so and I want to be completely hetero. I accepted, that the way of Living “gay” is NO option. Won’t change anything about it. Is there something like conversion Therapy? In my country it’s illegal lol. I want to change it. I know I can’t bc everyone says that but there is no way I can accept that. I want to be only attracted to girls and all that what comes with it. And I do love girls but it’s weird and I don’t understand. PS: idk if it helps to understand but I’m literally a therapist in my social range. I understand more problems than the problems itself but on google I only read answers to similar question like “you have to accept, otherwise u won’t be happy” but sexuality is just an interest, isn’t it? So it can be changed like interests can be changed. No matter what I have to do. There is always a way. What is wrong with me?

Hi. I’ve read a lot of posts here about women realising they were lesbians whilst in a relationship with a man.
How did you know you were a lesbian? I (32F) came out as queer a couple of years ago and have a wonderful girlfriend now. Part of me was always attracted to women but it wasn’t until my late 20s during my last relationship with a man that I felt it was a significant part of me that needed exploring. Our relationship broke down for a number of reasons and my queerness played a part in that, but he was someone I loved very much and in the end we wanted different things (I wanted a family and he didn’t, our sex life was difficult). I had loved 2 men before him, but after 6 months sex in those relationships always became a challenge. This is not something I struggle with my girlfriend now, albeit we’ve been together less than a year and it still feels very exciting.
I haven’t been obsessing over labels, but Ive always considered myself bisexual, in part because I find men attractive to look at and also because I want to honour that I really felt love and attractionfor my ex boyfriends. However, I am not sure I could really be in a relationship with a cis man again, and despite some aesthetic attraction to them I think I would find the idea of having sex with them very stressful. Is that queerness or negative (sometimes non-consensual) past experiences with men? I’m not sure. After my ex and I broke up I only dated women as felt like I needed to make up for lost time and wanted to explore. I met my girlfriend pretty soon after I started dating again.
I’m fascinated by people who definitively know that they are lesbians or realise they are lesbians after relationships with men. How are you so sure? I’m comfortable in my queerness and don’t question my attraction and desire too much. I happily call myself queer and feel like sexuality is a spectrum anyway.
But I would love to hear your stories about how you realised you were a lesbian and why you felt that label was the right one for you, rather than bisexual.
Much love to this community, reading your stories a few years ago helped me a lot in my coming out.
Thanks x

He left because we had the worst possible fight in history (I take full blame because I took it completely too far and was super toxic during it by disrespecting his belongings and destroying 3 of his things which I will forever regret). I’ve been going to therapy and been practicing meditation to find balance in my emotions and feelings because I would never want to hold in that much anger and explode like that to anyone. After the situation he was very cold and rude to me (which is understandable) in the first few weeks and after a few attempts to talk to him have failed and he seemed very detached, I told him I am just going to have to also detach and move on from him. He ended up sending me 3-4 super long paragraphs about how I wouldn’t be saying that if he would’ve just “packed all his things and moved back” and continued to pour his heart out to me about how damaging the situation was for him. It just seemed like he was mad that I would say I would have to move forward. He definitely made me feel sick to my stomach with his messages because I feel so horrible about my actions and I seen how much he put me first and I completely let him down. That is why I started therapy so I can become a better girlfriend to him and a better person in general, I wouldn’t even do what I did to the next person if there would be one. I have never done something like that throughout our entire relationship, it was the first time. After that convo, I thanked him for expressing his genuine feelings and apologized wholeheartedly once again and he’s been nice to me ever since. I really do love him with all of my heart and I really want to remove him from his depression since he’s back in his mother’s house and I want us to move forward together from this situation. He still tells me he loves me and I just know if he moves back we would be the strongest we have ever been. 10 year relationship, he’s the only man I’ve ever been with, he’s my first in everything. I would never want to go through this again and I would never in life want him to go through this again. Fuck how I feel, it’s him that I am more concerned about. I really want to make him happy and show him that he means the world to me and I’ll do whatever I can to prove it to him every day he lives here. Would you take that leap of faith with moving back to a place where you wanted to make it a home with someone you love? Is there still hope for us?

What does he (26m) want from me? (20f)
Me (20f) and this guy (26m) have been seeing each other for almost two years now. We started sleeping together and he ended it about a month or two in, telling me we both knew it was going nowhere and he didn’t want any feelings developing and hurt coming from it. This was fine, i just continued on with things and didn’t contact him. Then two weeks later we ended up seeing each other again on a night out and he told me he missed me and invited me to stay with him that night which i did. We continued on again for another couple of months, seeing each other often and sending long messages every day. Then I ended up finishing things as he got very intoxicated one night while i was home, rung me and then attempted to drive to my house. I was terrified he would hurt himself or someone else and managed to convince him to go home, which he reacted to rather badly in the state he was in. I texted him the next day and told him we should stop seeing each other because stuff like this cannot happen and he agreed and apologised. Didn’t see each other for two months, bumped into each other again on another night out. He was extremely apologetic, told me how much he missed me and how I was the first girl in a long time he had felt this way about. We ended up sleeping together again, this continued AGAIN for a few months until a massive argument around Christmas. He accused me of seeing another boy which, while that wasn’t the case, I felt was unfair regardless as he never asked me to be his girlfriend and i know for a fact hes at least kissed other girls while doing this with me. We didn’t talk for a few days but we’ve fallen back into this pattern again now of talking all the time and sleeping together after nights out. At this point, I do understand it’s just as much my fault as his but I don’t know what to do anymore. We’ve told each other we love each other but frankly it’s not enough and he freezes up anytime I look for any form of commitment from him. I have never drunk called or texted him and yet he is constantly doing that to me, telling me he dreams about me every night, how I’m the only girl to have this affect on him and things of a similar nature. I just cannot figure out what is going on in his head and he won’t tell me.
TL;DR: on and off again with this boy for two years, he says hes in love with me, consistently comes back to me and yet doesn’t seem to want a relationship. but doesn’t want me in a relationship with anyone else.

At the fisrt, sorry for my english, i'm a little oxidated, but i'll try my best. (it's not my original lenguaje)
But first, a little of context:
It's an story by 7 years. I did meet my (not still) ex-husband on a convention of Anime, i did in cossplayed by Electra and he was Tony Stark, he was had a girlfriend and I was in a toxit relationship (story i'll tell in other time). But in that day, i swear, i did wish had him, i did fall in love. We talk just a little moment, we take a photograph and we keep going with our lives.
One year latter, when i'd brake up my relationship, i fall down in a horrible depression and 1 try to unsiscribe by the life. I'd try to grow up and join a group of single peopple just search fun. I'd was surprised to find that boy again in that group.
Uno month latter, we'd be in a relationship. After two years, we was marrige. Whitout anything more than love, we start this new stage, in the night of weddings, i got pregnant.
At that moment, i wasn´t know i had anxiety and depression cronique, and during pregnancy it only gets worse, and our relationship wasn't the best, we fight a lot, especially because I felt very unprotected by my partner: when we went out there were men who made bad comments to me and I even had to walk home alone after work, not to mention that there were a couple of occasions in which, due to the times , I could only prepare food and run to work, without eating a bite, to be surprised when I returned that he alone finished the food without leaving me anything.
Added to that, the first four months of pregnancy and marriage, he was without work, I had to take care of the household alone; Added to this, to lighten the burden a little, a relative did us the favor of renting us well below the value he had, his house which was uninhabited. Imagine my shame when he asked for the rent and I didn't have the money to pay because my husband didn't go out looking for work. If they hadn't given him an ultimatum, he would have spent years like this, until he asked for a job at the only company where they don't fire anyone.
All of this caused me to spend the entire pregnancy stressed and worried.
The last straw was the day my baby was born, which coincided with my husband's birthday. I had a complicated birth, in which they had to do an emergency procedure: I was hospitalized for two full days, alone, without eating or drinking anything (For those who don't know, the medical service in Mexico is beyond terrible). Not to make it long, my birth was more than complicated; and my mortification was no less when all my relatives, when they were able to come see me, kept telling me how mortified they were, on the other hand my husband looked like a child at Christmas because they brought him gifts for his birthday, even my best friend from school.
When my baby was born, I was aware that I wasn't feeling well, so I decided to take some time to recover before returning to work. And for those who are wondering, it's not like I had a great job, our economic position was not good at all, but my depression only got worse since my baby was born, the complications of childbirth made me feel terribly guilty just thinking about it. that something could have happened to my baby.
Day after day, even though I did not work and did not contribute financially to the house, I made an effort to ensure that the little money that came into the house was enough for everything: milk, diapers and food. Despite everything, I always made sure to prepare a good breakfast and lunch for my husband to take to work, I got up before him so I could have that attention with him; Imagine my disappointment when he often returned with the food intact from when she prepared it for him and told me that he had preferred to buy something to eat. This only made me feel like I was useless. Added to the fact that on more than one occasion he even left the front door of the house open for us: a woman who had just had surgery and a newborn baby, in a neighborhood where, in open secret, it was hot for organized crime, added to the fact that I I felt insecure around him.
My family kept making comments to me about how bad my husband felt for me, how bad I looked (comments that I questioned, because my family never liked my husband). Despite the bad things, he had his attempts to be thoughtful and considerate (in the wrong way or causing me more problems, but I understood that it was his way of showing that he cared).
This was when I began to understand that my husband was like that, disconnected from reality, it was his shell of protection since he practically grew up in foster homes with "relatives" or "acquaintances", many of them were very violent and mistreated him, making him feel alone and vulnerable. I learned much of this from him, the rest his mother herself came to tell me and the rest was a matter of adding 2 + 2.
When I assimilated this and that the situation would not improve, when my baby turned 9 months old, I decided to look for a job, fortunately I found a way to work from what I studied (because yes, I have a degree), and with very humanitarian bosses. those who didn't even mind me occasionally taking my baby to teach classes with me (because yes, I ended up teaching at a basic level). Thanks to this, the situation at home improved a little, but the arguments did not stop over small things, more than anything everything he did or did not do bothered me. I guess it was because of the exhaustion of dealing with everything alone, and for anyone wondering, no, he practically didn't help me with the baby issues; With the household chores (just washing the dishes and sometimes sweeping the common areas), I took care of the rest, in addition to always making sure the house was safe for a one-year-old baby.
One of the breaking points for me (this occurs in the dark time of the pandemic when we all lock ourselves at home), your company was one of the last to send them to rest, however, since my sector was related to dealing with children, I was one of the first sectors to confine themselves to home, so now I was doing homme office. One morning I realized that the man not only lost the keys to the house, but he took mine to leave, locked them and left them stuck outside the door, leaving me locked in with my baby without the possibility of getting out if anything arose. emergency. If it hadn't been for my father, who came to visit me to see how he was doing, who knows what would have happened. Get an idea of ​​how little he cared about the safety of his family.
These, among other things, added up over the years, until I began to ask him, as a last chance to save our marriage (because at this point, I felt broken and discouraged), I insisted that we seek help, couples therapy or at least individual therapy, but he didn't listen to me or wasn't interested. Until the first time I packed my and my baby's things, he realized that I was serious and that I would leave him, he still didn't want therapy, not even when I was honest with him and told him that there were many things that I couldn't do. forgive him, especially for the pregnancy; What did happen was that he began to collaborate more at home and finally began to take responsibilities with our son.
The facts:
What ended up being the final break was a day of extreme heat, where the weather was useless and there were no technicians operating in the area. My son, now 3 years old, is very hot and in any heat his nose tends to bleed a lot, especially that weekend he was very tired, despite that, the only solution I could think of was to put the pool inside the house ( to avoid having it under the sun), I clarify that at that time we lived in a small two-bedroom apartment, which yes, I admit was an impractical solution but it was the only thing that occurred to me. Even before I did it, I notified him of what I was trying to do, not to ask for permission, but just to notify him so he wouldn't be taken by surprise.
When he got home, he didn't say hello, he didn't say anything, he just left his things and left the house to get a taxi. When I caught up with him to ask him, he said he was going to his mother's house to get an air conditioning unit that he planned to bring to install to solve the problem, to which I gave him my list of problems with it, because we didn't have permission to make modifications to begin with. Thus in the department, adding the amount of electricity it used, transportation, among others. To which he also responded with his list of drawbacks that he saw with my solution. The point is that the argument escalated and ended with him throwing the water into the garden and me locking myself in the room with my daughter, enduring the heat of the day.
Neither of us spoke to each other the rest of the day, in the morning, the first thing I did was pack my things and my baby's things discreetly. I called my parents to tell them what had happened and they were more than willing to receive us (something that did not make me so calm because, yes, one of the reasons why I married him in a hurry was that my parents were a cornerstone of my anxiety and depression).
The next night, with my things packed, I waited for my husband to drop the bomb, tell him that he was leaving with our son, he cried a lot, he begged me for another chance; That time I didn't shed a single tear, not because I didn't love him, despite everything, I followed him and I still love him, but I realized that I was loving him more than I loved me and my daughter. . I didn't cry because I spent years crying alone and falling asleep with tears.
I asked him if he would prefer to end the relationship peacefully, where we could still rescue our friendship, before reaching a point where I couldn't even tolerate seeing him.
That was the only time when he finally said that he would take therapy, but I no longer believed him. I know he did it just to convince me, but in the end he wasn't going to do it. So I decided to leave the next day with my things. It was the last time we talked about it.
At the moment:
We have a year apart, we decided to give ourselves a few months to settle in and calm our spirits. Despite this, we have still kept in touch through our daughter, when it is her turn to visit or when she brings him an errand.
I don't deny that I still love him, and now I'm the one who would like our marriage to be fixed, but he is the first to say that he feels better now.
Now that I am living with my parents, my symptoms of anxiety and depression have not improved at all, on the contrary. I don't know if I ever feel like going back to him was a desperate attempt to get out of my parents' house, because he was the only person who made me feel understood and that there was nothing wrong with being who I was (I did). which has mainly contributed to my mental health), because I clarify, my son has a disability and since his diagnosis, he has not contributed much either, I have been with the support of my family in the face of that, but not with my ex-husband or the his family, so I use practically all of my salary on my son and his basic needs; His father gives me alimony for him, but only the equivalent of $20 dollars a week, against medication a month that costs about $100, plus his therapies and special attention.
So I ask.
AITAH for asking my husband for a divorce for refusing to go to therapy?
I really appreciate that you take the time, I know that it is not a short or brief story, I will try to answer your questions in the comments if I have not been clear in any aspect. Right now I'm a mess, I'm discouraged because my situation is currently not good, my profession wears me out emotionally and mentally, added to the condition of my son who makes me feel like I'm not doing things right...
I need to know that there is something in life that I haven't done so badly. In advance, thank you Reddit community.

Hi - sorta long post. I met my girlfriend two years ago while I had my first job and she was graduating college. We were both virgins and she hadn’t done more than kissing a guy before me but had been in two long relationships (four years total). Our relationship started off pretty sexual and, honestly, very spicy. Fast forward a month and we tried to have sex; however, I had performance issues. These issues continued for 6-7 months until we basically stopped trying to have sex as she started her new job and moved to another state (I also had a new job in the same state, so I went with her).
Once she started her new job, over time our sexual intimacy declined a lot. She has a stressful computer science job and works a lot, which she pointed to as the reason for her libido going down. She was also on birth control and multiple medications. Aside from the sex, all other forms of intimacy were amazing (cuddling, kissing, holding hands, etc.). We’ve had our fair share of rough patches and fights, and I personally feel like I haven’t treated her the best. A lot of it was due to her being closed off about sexual topics and trying to improve our sex lives. Basically, sex became a big pressure point, and she was the one who controlled if it happened.
About a year ago, she felt asexual and said maybe sex isn’t important to her and she could live the rest of her life without it (she also barely masturbates, like once every two weeks). I didn’t care about sex at that point since I love her for who she is and could live without it. Also, I should note I gained like 70+ pounds, and she gained weight too, but we were still sexual at points like once a month or every other month (no penetration), so my looks didn’t affect anything. I just became more insecure.
Fast forward to 2024, I get a new job and am working remotely. I fly out a few times to see her (intimacy gets worse to the point where we’re not even changing in front of each other). She said it was because of how I treated her in December (had a huge insecure moment) and we tried to move on. Anyway, she recently started a move to a bigger city for the same company, and I had booked a flight to see her. She said she was excited to see me and spend time. Last night, she calls me and brings up how she feels this is more of a platonic friendship than a romantic one. She mentions how she could never have sex again with me potentially (due to relationship baggage), wants to be in a relationship where sex is easy and not a huge thing, and also how she saw a coworker for lunch and had sexual feelings.
Ultimately, we canceled the flight, but I still talked to her and logic’d some of this out. She originally wanted to take a break to “explore her sexuality,” and then we went back and forth for a few hours to finally understand the situation better. Now we’re taking a one-month break where she just wants alone time to move and break out of this co-dependency and relying on me for everything. We are still both exclusive and not seeing anyone. She mentioned we will probably be back together and not to feel stressed or sad (but I’m so sad). I still have a flight scheduled a few months out for her birthday, and she said to keep it assuming stuff gets better. I feel pretty horrible, and I love her so much. She’s like my best friend, and you’re supposed to marry your best friend. Two-plus years and we yap to each other, hold each other, and just do everything in a relationship except sex. I imagined a full life with her and thought she was the one. Our love was so pure and deep without the need for a sexual connection. Every time we called or hung out, it was always exciting.
I hope after this break we can get back together and continue, but part of me feels like this is the end. She mentioned we should talk more, but I said no contact during this month (we might chat on the weekends). I don’t want to lose such an amazing person.
TLDR: My girlfriend and I had a great relationship without sex due to issues in the beginning. She promised sex isn’t important to her and she might be asexual. I then get blindsided a few days ago when she says she doesn’t have feelings for me anymore and has sexual feelings for her coworker. She’s confused about her sexuality and wanted to initially explore it more, but we talked. Now we’re on a break where we’re not seeing other people for a month without contact so she can do things independently (moving to a new apartment and starting at a new office location), and she said the possibility of us getting back together is 50/50 but probably will happen. I am conflicted, traumatized, and don’t know how to move forward.

Frey Holland

"I'll let you in on a secret, but… I'm a pretty big deal. Like, actually I'm kind of a big deal now!"
A New York native, Frey Holland is in reality a descendant of Athia’s lineage of matriarchs, the Tanta’s. Daughter of the Tanta of Love, Cinta, Frey has a powerful magical affinity within her. And that magic is only amplified by the magical parasite she calls Cuff—although he’d prefer Vambrace. For more info, look at my beautifully crafted, full-length respect thread of the girl of all girls.
Strength

• Breaks open a locked door with a launched projectile
  
• One of Frey's attacks leaves cracks in Tanta Sila's throne. The throne is presumably made of some type of stone.
  

Durability

• Takes a large fireball that sets the entire wall and a few bookcases aflame
  
• Her shield takes a hit that destroys Tanta Sila's entire throne room, leaving nothing behind but shattered walls and pillars
  
• Takes a kick that craters the floor and kicks rocks into the air
  
• Takes three blasts from Susurrus and falls off her dragon/mother's back down to the floor. Though she is teleported closer to the ground mid fall, the actual distance is still considerable
  

Speed

• Dodges a point-blank swing from Tanta Sila's sword

Magic

• Frey’s magic is divided by the Tanta’s, whose magic she absorbs after she defeats them. These give her the power over specific elements, namely:
  
  • Frey’s own magic: Earth/nature
    
    • Can use magic to make gigantic branches emerge from the ground
    • Frey can bind foes with living plants.
    • Her bonds are strong enough to constrain Tanta Sila, the Tanta of strength.
  • Tanta Sila's Magic: Fire
    
    • Can use Sila's control over fire to pull people towards her like a whip.
    • Sila's magic allows Frey to use a blade brimming with flames.
    • Frey can also unleash a flurry of fiery punches.
    • Can enclose an area in flames
  • Tanta Prav's Magic: Water
    
    • Can use Prav's control over water and gravity to float into the air.
    • Can summon a watery pillar that spouts out from the ground.
    • Can trap foes with water and then freeze them.
  • Tanta Olas' Magic: Lightning
    
    • Can use Olas' control over electricity to zip across the battlefield at high speeds.
    • Can make an area erupt in lightning.
    • Frey can create an illusory decoy of herself.
    • Can cast a storm-charged spear that erupts into lightning.

Misc. skills

• Frey Holland is immune to the Break, a magical disease that affects everyone else in Athia but her.
  
• Is adept at climbing/parkour, even without magic. With magic, these skills are only heightened.
  
• Eventually, she gains control over Torana's (magical portals) and is able to summon them at will.
  
  • These portals are inter- as well as intradimensional
• Has a super cool girlfriend <3
  

How to Use Frey on R slash WhoWouldWin

Frey’s main boon is her large variety of magical options. Her physicals aren’t all that impressive, but an opponent who is slightly more physically capable than her could be overpowered or overwhelmed by her sheer amount of options. Her speed with Olas’s magic (though only really expressed in gameplay, so should be taken with a grain of salt) is also incredibly impressive. If you are to use her, I’d suggest opponents who are more physically focused and maybe lacking in the magical/esoteric department.