Easel recipe binder

tw: csa, neglect, emotional and physical abuse
whether you choose to or not is your decision, and most people have been through more severe situations than i have so i completely understand why the majority of people go no-contact. this is just my personal experience not advice or a discussion or anything. me, i have a pretty textbook recipe for cptsd: bpd/ocd teen mom and schizophrenic/depressive/npd teen dad. yes they have been professionally diagnosed with all of these things. when i was 3 i told everyone my dad sexually abused me and understandably my dad flipped out so i backtracked and said it was a joke. i have no idea what he did because my mom never witnessed anything and my dad refuses to talk about it without going into a rage and blaming me for my family's divorce and him losing all of his friends. ive been hypersexual since i was about a year old also so i have my suspicions about him either way. my mom got on drugs shortly after the divorce to work 2 jobs in a town about an hour over, so you can imagine i didnt see her much for my childhood-- i only had her mugshot after a police chase and picking her up after she crashed a car because she fell asleep driving to go by for a good 5-7 years. i hated her when she left. i was dead convinced she was a drug addict and a deadbeat because i didnt understand she was doing it for her kids. i lived with my grandparents during that time and they were neglectful as all get out and didn't even care if me and my sibling showered, brushed our teeth, slept at a reasonable time, or even went to school. my mom cared because she would be the one going to jail if we were truants. i was an anxious little kid and told everyone i had the stomach bug instead of going to school but i faked sick too long and my mom would come over in the mornings to drag me by my hair and beat my ass. which just made me more anxious and unwilling to go to school, or go out in public for that matter. probably the worst of my childhood boiled down to when i was 10 and my mom always shit talked my appearance and said i never took care of myself and got fat so she went to buy me new clothes. i was too anxious to even set foot out of the car and kept nervously brushing my hair to self soothe (thought i looked ugly but in retrospect girl u were fidgeting) until she took the brush out of my hand and whacked me on the head with it which caused a whole situation and her fighting to get me out of the car while i was crying. she called the cops and i just so happened to get some douche who got off to scaring the shit out of kids, because he handcuffed me for no reason just to lecture me and tell me to listen to my mom or i'd get sent to "adult prison." fun experience i guess. anyway the rest of my childhood and adolescence was my mom berating me for the smallest things and expecting me to act like a little adult and work and tend to the house AND also somehow have straight As in school, have friends, extracurriculars, and hobbies, but she's not going to financially support any of those hobbies or actually set into motion for me to hang out with friends. the few times i ever hung out with people i went to THEIR house and THEIR parents had to chaperone me around, and my family was just not involved to the point my friends wondered if i even had a mom. not even going to mention the transphobia i faced from my mom, but she took my binder that i bought with my own money and donated it to some rural christian thrift store... even thought itd be hilarious to mention the fact that theyd probably throw it out not even knowing what it was (this is long and melodramatic)
and yet... i still love my family. maybe feel obligated to, even. maybe my dad molested me and if so he's fucking disgusting for it. i don't know why you'd ever touch a baby. i don't know why he'd even have a motive to do so. he didn't really have a motive to cheat on my mom and fight her in front of me as a baby and steal her savings and drive out of state with no notice either. now he's just sad and suicidal and has been for over a decade and he's still hung up over the family he destroyed and apologizes to me anytime he sees me. to me, he's gotten his just desserts: he's a late 30s stoner who still lives with his parents and is still mad at his ex wife a decade later. i will never be close to him for abusing my mom but i genuinely forgive him for what he may have done to me and also the things he actually did to me, like calling me a slut and making me change my clothes and not wear makeup around him and telling me, his 8 year old daughter at the time, that women should be barefoot and pregnant and are also evil cheating jezebels. he still does it occasionally but his words hold no power over me and i think he realizes that so he's become more tolerant and agreeable. my mom basically destroyed any chance of me not fearing intimacy or anything short of perfection or being myself but sometimes she gets drunk and just sobs and hugs me and tells me she's sorry she couldn't do better and i wish she could have at the time when it kind of mattered substantially more to my development, but im proud of how far she's come and that she's trying to be less strict and cruel to toughen me up and make me appear relatively functional and normal, the things she couldn't be at the time. this lowkey turned me into a functional addict and gave me a really bad habit of dissociating and not listening to my needs later in life but its chillin.
after ALL of this forgiving my family for essentially giving me a shit hand at life is pretty rough. but its ultimately helped with my hypervigilance and i dont immediately read everyone's actions as if they are judging me or see me as a burden-- it just takes substantially less than the average person for me to feel that way! maybe i have not healed at all in my behaviors and still act like a sad, scared angry little kid. but i feel less wary of them at the least, and its nice for now.

Hi friends, so I went ahead and bought a scale that measures to the 2nd decimal point (0.00)
Now that I’m able to get precise, I’d love to know what the consensus is for the floral/fragrance powder: to base/binder: to water is.
I’ve been using this formula as my starting point:
X amount of fragrance powder
1/3 of that amount = amount of tabu-no-ki
1\2 of all of that = amount of water to use
This has produced relatively inconsistent results and I’m wondering if it’s because I wasn’t working with a scale or if there’s just a better recipe to follow.
Thanks all!!!

Spoilers and whining ahead: Looking for some tips/help on a few topics 🥺

• Navigating: I really don’t understand the map/navigation, at least on the “Ipad” screen. It doesnt seem to function like a map, only shows locations I’ve been to with static maps that I’ve collected. Am I missing something navigation wise?
  
• Floor 1-2 Enemies 🥲: I am so intensely frustrated with the dog creature’s line of vision, their speed, and their damage. I’ll be fairly stealthy on level 3 and one will chase me all the way back down to my base in level one, open the door, and literally will start attacking my workbench. WHY tho. I just want a chance to escape. They’re so ruthless and they don’t give up..
  For the little jumpy guys, I really like using the vacuum to clear them out, but they always somehow manage to hit me somehow. Ie: they’ll jump, I get damage, and THEN they get attached to the vacuum. It’s super annoying, I cant tell if this is just me or if I need to be more aware of my/their hitbox ..
  

I’m also so bad at hitting both enemy types. I know skills scale— but compared to like— Valheim or something,i hit these creatures like 30% of the time. Meanwhile a bite or two has me bleeding. Slow bandage usage and reloads means I’m dead. Every single time..

• Home base and spawning: I keep reading that the “safe area” is supposed to not have spawning enemies, but I’m constantly returning to base and dogs and hoppers are waiting for me. Cut to: the dogs opening my base door again and killing me. I waa looking for a barricade recipe— cant find one. When I try to package a desk, it has 95% breakage chance, So I cant even make a bummy barricade…
  
• objectives: i feel incredibly stupid, its been hours and I have no clue who or what “find someone who knows about powercells” is supposed to mean. I make it to level 3 and so many creatures follow me upstairs that I die during an npc convo
  

EDIT:
THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR SUGGESTIONS!! this community is so amazing already. To update yall I’m almost done with offices, I have a humble “townhouse” base set up near Silo 3, near the elevator, so that’s been an AMAZING spot so far. TONS of tech parts in all the offices, anvils, pens and binders galore, lots of water coolers. Been getting used to combat especially with the windup skill unlocked. Thank yall 💕

Any recommendations on troubleshooting homemade incense cones that smell like burning vegetation instead of their intended aromatic?
I have made 4 batches of homemade incense cones and when I burn them after completely drying they don’t smell nice. It smells like straight up burnt wood, and not even like a nice bonfire, but just super basic burnt wood/dried herbs. Even the two blends I’ve tried smell the same even though they smell nice in cone form before being lit.
Here are the recipes I tried:

1. & 2. Lavender & Sandalwood
2. Sandalwood 3.6 grams, Guar Gum 0.8 grams, Lavender 7.5 grams. With distilled water.
3. I ground the sandalwood and lavender myself and used an 80 mesh sifter.
4. First round didn’t burn and kept going out, so I reground the cones and added more sandalwood and lavender thinking it was too much binder. But same results in batch two, and both batches had no aroma with the little burn I did get.
   
5. Lemongrass and Clove
   
6. Makko 3 grams, Clove 0.6 grams, and lemongrass 0.5 grams. With distilled water.
   
7. Also ground the clove and lemongrass in this recipe with an 80 mesh sifter.
   
8. Difference in this cone was a better burn, but still no aroma when burning.
   
9. Lemongrass
   
10. Lemongrass 1.1 grams, Makko 3 grams. With distilled water.
    
11. This one burns very well, but no aroma.
    

Any ideas on why my cones don’t smell like nice incense when burning?
Thanks for the help!

Gf Sandwich Bread (TH)
Hello all!
I’m writing to share about my gf baking adventures. I started baking gluten free goods a couple years back and stopped because it was so hard and complicated.
I recently got back into since being with my partner who is gluten free. This time mainly focusing on bread! His dream since he was diagnosed gluten intolerance was to have good bread and sandwiches again. So I started trying!
Gf baking is very delicate and can be hard to get right especially with bread. I found two recipes for a sandwich bread and they both didn’t work for me. They either turned out dense, gummy, or failed to rise.
It’s a common occurrence when I try recipes written in Europe or somewhere else that have different flour mixes and ingredients I can’t get my hands on (we live in Thailand). And different oven setting and climate play a huge part too! So I’ve had to experience a lot🤣
I finally have some success with this loaf in the pictures. The loaf is a mixture of brown and black Riceberry rice flours and tapioca starch (white rice flour would work too!).
The main binders are xanthan gum, psyllium husk, and egg whites. I’m convinced that the bread can work without the gum and the egg whites but I haven’t yet experimented it. I’m also developing a recipe that is vegan friendly for my vegan friends!
I’m going to bake it a few more times and once I got a consistent result, I will be sharing the recipe here.
Will attach a video of first slicing too!

Hi, all.
I love to have physical recipes, and I'm planning to buy a mini lamination machine at home so that I laminate some of the recipes I've printed for my own personal use (I'm transferring my recipes from binder to recipe box, so I want to laminate it to prevent bending). My question is, can normal photocopier A4 papers (80gsm) be laminated or do I need to use use thicker paper? if 80gsm paper is allowed, how many mil/microns should I look at for the pouch? or you can also recommend something else. I really hope that someone will answer this. It's too expensive to laminate at the shop, MY$2.50 - MY$3.00 per sheet.
Thanks in advance! 🙏🏻🙏🏻

For this recent May the 4th I made myself some Blue Milk based off the YouTube channel How to Drink. However I noticed that the coconut oil would soon separate and solidify after several minutes. This meant I had to keep mix it together and it got annoying after awhile. I then had the idea that I needed a Binder for the coconut oil and the water in the rice milk.
I tried guar gum because I was going to use it for another recipe, but it caused the milk to thicken and have these gross gummy bits in it. So now I'm at a loss as to what the best emulsifier for this recipe would be without thickening or making super unhealthy. Would appreciate the help.

2 weeks later Lauren and Greyson drove up to her new home with boxes and whatever she hadn’t sold. Lauren had walked through her empty home and said goodbye to each room wondering if she was making the right decision. The house was pretty much sold already and Lauren reminded herself to keep going.
“Audrey will come around Ma. She really will miss you and she doesn’t want to change. God forbid she tell you right out that she is going to miss you. “ Greyson said. Lauren hadn’t spoken to Audrey directly since she had told the kids she was moving. She had come over at one point to get some furniture and mementos and had been snarky the entire time that Lauren had been in the house. Lauren had had quite enough of it and went to the backyard to smoke until Audrey and her man of the week had taken off. They hadn’t even come out to tell her they were leaving. Lauren had had another good cry after that and then made herself margaritas with her mixer and called Natalie to come over for a good farewell bitch session. They had gotten tipsy and talked about ungrateful kids and sent nice little waves to Grace who huffed at them.
“Well, maybe she will and maybe she wont. She always favored your father and I never told her she had to pick sides but all the same she felt like she had to. The divorce was harder on her than it was you older two.She was only 8.” Lauren said lamely.
“I think Cora and I were just glad you guys weren’t fighting. Dad was great with us but he treated you terribly the last few years you were together and it was just so much easier to not hate him when you guys weren’t around each other. Audrey was definitely his favorite though and any time she came over he just made sure they did everything she wanted because he was afraid she’d hit puberty and would decide she didn’t like him anymore. Like Cora.”
“Well that makes sense. How’s you-know-who?” Lauren asked changing the topic.
“Miranda? Alright I guess. Her mom picked Liam up last night for the weekend so I could help you, says she called a month ago and sounded good. I don’t know if that means anything or not but I don’t think she is going to come back wanting to be Liam's mom. At least not any time soon. I don’t really care, she had him and that was the deal. That’s all I asked for. I’d have supported the other way too but I really hoped she’d just let me keep him. She told everyone who asked she didn’t want kids. Everyone. I kind of wonder if she’ll want to meet him and be afraid to because everyone will expect her to be someone to him.” Grayson drummed his fingers anxiously. Lauren couldn’t understand this arrangement that Grayson and Miranda had. She kept wondering if it wasn’t some form of depression or something but Grayson insisted it wasn’t. He’d had Liam all to himself from day one and never complained.
“You think taking this was too impulsive? The job? I didn’t even do a face to face interview. It was on that skype thing. Eric set it all up. It’s legit but maybe I should’ve driven up first to check it out. Maybe I’m just running scared.”
“Maybe it was but taking risks makes your life exciting. Besides, I hate thinking of you alone in the house waiting for something bad to happen.” Grayson patted her leg. “Besides you said there were discounts on cabins and I’d like that. Plus unlike the last job, if Liam gets sick he can hang out with you when he can’t go to daycare.”
“I would like that.”
They pulled onto a winding dirt road and drove another 10 miles. The woods on each side of the road pressed in on them. It was a nice feeling. It was quiet out here and Lauren appreciated it. She had thought she would be more scared to be alone out here but she found herself looking forward to it now. Settling down and maybe a beer.
The GPS took them toa large sign marked Camp Thellgar in front of a fork in the road, one marked OFFICE and the other marked CAMPING. They turned into the OFFICE fork on the left. A man sat on the porch at the first building they came up to. He shaded his eyes and stood as they approached. Lauren took a shaky breath.
“Does my eye still look weird?” Lauren asked Grayson.
“Nah, the makeup covers whatever is left. It looks a little off I guess but I don’t think anyone would guess why. You’re old, he’ll think you had a stroke more than likely” Grayson teased. Lauren let out a high pitched laugh and took a deep cleansing breath.
“Hi I’m Steven Connor, you’re Lauren Jackson I hope.” Steven stuck his hand out for her to shake.
“I am indeed. Nice to meet you, you look different in person.” Lauren said laughing. He did, he looked older than he had on the computer, tired maybe. Steven shrugged. “This is my son Grayson, he’s helping bring my stuff up for me.”
“Right, good of you to help your momma. Come right in here. This is the main office, just off of what will be your cabin. Initially they were one in the same but years back we decided the caretaker could use some more privacy when we added more cabins in. The cabins have only been part of the deal for about 15 years, before that it was just the tent sites. No electricity on those. They’re a little easier to maintain. This time of year we mainly get people who want to use the tent sites, families out for a day hike. Summer rolls around and you’ll be pretty busy. We hire help from the nearby towns, you’ll let them know what to do but you’ll need someone in the office most of the day. There’s an alarm here that will pop up on your phone, when synced with the app of course, that way you can be out on the grounds. There’s an ATV for getting around a little easier. You’ll be in charge of taking reservations and handling the payment, cleaning up the campsites when they leave, looking in on them to make sure they’re kept up. Same with the cabins. Do a thorough cleaning and dust once a week. Aspen Cunningham, that’s the girl from town, she’ll be up every other day to assist with cleaning out the cabins. Here’s the card for Aspen, the card for a maintenance guy we use, Roger, and my card if you need to get ahold of me.” Steven led her from the office which was a small front room with a storage room behind it. Off of that there was a door with a good lock that led into a small house. It came in by a small half bath and then stairs leading to 2 bedrooms upstairs and a full bathroom. Next to the stairs a door led into a small living room with a few bookshelves and a dated TV, past that a kitchen with a dining area. It was cozy and Lauren was in love immediately.
“The last guy was pretty organized, we have our own binder we put together for new employees, he made his own as well. I skimmed through it, mostly a heads up on common maintenance issues. There’s a copy of maintenance performed on each cabin and site that also goes in the main book that’s stashed in the office.” Steven handed her a heavy worn binder.
“I’ll go ahead and start bringing in your stuff mom.” Grayson said backing out the main front door that didn’t lead into the office. Lauren followed Steven into the office and he showed her where anything she could need to find would be. She watched a safety video that featured Steven’s family, made when Steven was a kid. His smiling face running around in the background.
Grayson hung out for a while after Steven left. Lauren was overwhelmed and felt exhausted. She wandered through her new house while Grayson made her spaghetti. She laid on the bed. It was firmer than she was used to but it was ok.
After they ate Grayson hesitantly left. Reminding her to call if she needed anything, asking if she was sure she wanted him to leave. Lauren had a feeling he would’ve spent the night if Miranda’s mom didn’t have Liam. There was a firepit in the backyard so she got a fire going and sat back watching the flames while she drank a beer. She thought about getting stoned but it felt too new here and she was afraid of freaking herself out. The noises of the woods were relaxing. It felt quiet. Quiet was exactly what she needed.
The next few months went quickly, Lauren got in a groove of checking all the sites in the morning and doing general maintenance. Aspen, the girl who cleaned, came up twice a week not every other day like Steven had said. She was a sweet girl and spent a few hours dusting and vacuuming the empty cabins. Lauren and her got along really well and Lauren was grateful for the company. Summer came and Lauren was busy, she barely left the office it seemed. If it wasn’t reservations, it was families asking for maps of the trails or information on the town below. It was a nice busy. Lauren had expected the cleaning to be worse than it actually was, most people cleaned up after the campsites before they left. Fall came and the people started to slow down, most of the people she saw were people hiking the trails and less camping By November she was slow again.
One day her phone went off alerting her to a visitor in the office. She jumped on her ATV and headed back up. There was a small run down car waiting when she pulled up. Lauren ran her hands through her hair as she entered the door. 4 middle aged women stood waiting patiently.
“Sorry, I was a little further out today, how can I help you? Cabin?” Lauren asked, coming around the desk.
“Where’s Jim?” One woman with darker hair asked.
“Jim? Was he the man before me? I’m afraid he doesn’t work here anymore. Just me, I’m Lauren. Regulars?” Lauren grabbed the binder from underneath the counter and flipped through until she came on regulars. Scanning the list she found a November regular, along with a few other months. “Ok, here we are. It says the Helgas, tentsite 42. Yes?”
“That’s right, what happened to Jim? I'm surprised to see that he’s gone.” The dark haired woman handed over her credit card and tapped on the table anxiously. The other women moved around like they were trying to look as if they weren’t paying much attention.
“Not sure. No one really told me and I didn’t think to ask. I’ve been here since late spring, right before the summer rush. “ Lauren felt like she was being judged by the women.
“We’re particular about our privacy.” One of the women from the back said, trying to sound casual.
“That’s no problem, I won’t need to come by until you leave.” Lauren assured them.
“Jim left the entire area alone. I mean, we prefer to be left completely alone.” She clarified. Lauren was taken aback but nodded. After they left and had driven off she looked back down at the binder.
Helgas
Camp site 42
November Full Moon
December 21
March 21
Require all sites in the area empty. 3 day reservations. Noise level low, some disturbances.
Lauren closed the binder. She’d flipped through it before but obviously hadn’t retained much information. It occurred to her that this wasn’t in the main binder. She picked up the company binder, flipped through until she found regular reservations. Nothing helpful from the last 10 years. She booted up the computer and pulled up the spreadsheet. There it was. Reservations, regular. A list of people and campsites and cabins. The program was designed to automatically block off the areas that were supposed to be reserved. Campsite 42 was not on the list for today. Maybe because it was a full moon reservation and not a specific date? Lauren flipped through December and it wasn’t in there either. She sighed. Lauren went to the main screen and added in the December reservation and it stopped her. Ok. So it's here somehow. Or it wouldn’t have stopped her. But it doesn't show up. It’s hidden. Lauren crossed her arms and dropped her head down. She wasn’t completely computer illiterate but she really didn’t know how to see this. The last guy, Jim? Jim. That guy must’ve done something to the computer system. Why would he have done that? He did all the reservations. Unless he didn’t want the company itself to see. They could log in through the main office and see what was going on up here. There was another location they owned and the computer program was designed to work with that one. Lauren shook her head and sighed. Maybe she could get ahold of Steven and ask about Jim.
Lauren opened Jim’s binder again. There were only a few regulars that didn’t have reservations that showed up in the company system. By the time she was done it was dark outside. Lauren sighed and shut everything down. She locked up the office displaying the note to ring the doorbell. The doorbell that alerted her phone to a visitor that would need checked in. Lauren wasn’t worried about it, not in November. It was warmish for November but still cold. No one hunted up here because it had too many people walking up the trails, further out maybe but they would rent a cabin ahead of time if they stayed up here and on the weekends.
Lauren went into her kitchen and got a jar of chili out of the fridge. Cora had made some and sent it home with her after Saturday dinner a few weeks ago. It was easy to heat up. She got a glass of wine and started a fire in the fireplace to warm the house up. She turned the tv on and laid across the couch until she could smell the chili. She’d had a bus day and found herself drifting off before she’d finished eating so she cleaned up and took herself to bed.
Lauren found herself awake in the forest. Barefoot. It was silent. Completely silent. Lauren cautiously spun around trying to get her bearings. She saw movement off to the right. Her heart stopped, she looked over trying to make sense in the dark. Something moved next to the trees, an animal? Lauren took a step toward it without thinking.
Someone or something stepped out wearing an animal skull. Deer? Lauren couldn’t think through her fear. The clothes were baggy and run down. Like a t shirt over loose black pants tied up with a rope and black cardigan. With a black long jacket.
“Who are you?” Lauren asked, dazed.
“I should ask you the same thing. Where is the keeper?” The thing asked, but it wasn’t said aloud, she heard it in her head.
“I-I don’t know. I just got hired here a few months ago. My friend's friend helped me get the job.”
“Then the Keeper sent you here.” The thing insisted
“I don’t think so, the man before me, I didn’t know him.”
“I see. What did they tell you about this place?” The thing asked, circling her. Lauren realized it was tracing her with a skeletal finger.
“How to take reservations and how to clean.” Lauren murmured, trying not to look as scared as she felt.
“I could tell you.” The thing offered. Lauren felt her anxiety rise up and suddenly felt like she needed to be gone. She shouldn’t trust this thing, whatever it was.
“Um, no thanks.You could-could tell me who you are though.” Lauren said instead
“I’m insulted is what I am. You’ll have to figure out who on your own.” With that he was gone and she was in bed sitting up breathing hard. The raspy voice still echoing in her head.
Lauren blinked. A dream. It was a dream. But it had felt real. She checked her feet and saw that they were clean. A dream.
Lauren’s whole day was off after that. Everything looked sharper almost and she found herself pinching her arm to make sure she was actually awake. She avoided the tent sites circling around with the Helgas but found herself inspecting the rest of them carefully, unsure of what she was looking for. After that she rode down to the cabins and did a quick inspection, checking the windows for torn screens and the doors for any sign of break in, double checking the lock. All good. Lauren was done early and decide to walk one of the trails to shake off the oddness. There weren’t a lot of trails she hadn’t already walked so she picked one of the harder ones and grabbed her backpack with snacks and water.
In the months since moving up here she had grown stronger from the work and the access to trails. Anytime she felt herself slipping into a depressive episode or started thinking too much she would go on a long trail and try to exhaust herself. At some point she had started running in the mornings although had stopped in the last few weeks because of the cold and how long it took the sun to rise. Lauren ran a few miles awkwardly with the backpack and then slowed. There was a not well used trail off to the side. She was certain she was still on the company's property but had not seen this one before so she cautiously went off the main trail and headed down it. It didn’t take long for it to grow darker with the trees overhead. There were still nature noises but they seemed almost muted. Lauren pinched her arm just to make sure, it definitely hurt. She was definitely awake. Lauren pulled her camera out of her bag and began snapping pictures of the area around her, partly to remember where she had come from and partly because she was in awe of the area around her. It was beautiful out here and the trees made her feel small and light. She checked her phone and saw that it was nearing dark. She stopped and drank some water before turning around. Lauren moved at a brisk pace as she headed back and almost missed the flash of light off to her left. But as such she had just managed to catch it and it stopped her in her tracks.
“Hello?” Lauren called out, if it was a hunter she had run into, which she didn’t think it was, not as close to the campgrounds as they were, but if it was she wanted it clear they were dealing with a person. No one answered her though. She hesitantly stepped off the trail and walked toward it. She couldn’t think of anything that would flash out here. Cameras? She wasn’t aware of any out here but it had never occurred to her to ask anyone. Regardless, she should check to see if it was a camera before she asked about there being any. She came to a massive tree. She craned her head back and light hit her eyes so that it was difficult to make out the top of the tree. The branches started low giving her a compulsion to climb upwards. Off to the side of it the roots rose up seeming to form a circle. Lauren took a few pictures of it without thinking. She got as many different angles as possible. She had seen roots that came out of the ground but had never seen one that formed a perfect circle. Lauren looked around and realized that it was dark now, she checked her phone and saw the battery was almost drained. She had been here for 3 hours. Lauren blinked and shook her head. 3 hours? That was impossible. She started shaking and spun around when she realized how silent it was, even for night time.
SNAP
Lauren gasped and took off running. She didn’t think about anything other than heading back in the direction she had come. Adrenaline coursed through her and she felt like she was running faster than she had before. It was dizzying how sharp everything was and how fast it seemed to go by her. She hit the main trail and kept running. She could feel her energy start to dip and she pushed herself harder. By the time she emerged from the woods she fell on the ground sobbing and gasping for air. She grabbed a fistful of grass with one hand and put her other palm to her mouth to stifle the sobbing, screaming sounds she was making. It felt like an hour of laying on the ground trying to collect herself. It was one of the Helgas that found her.
“Are you ok? Ma’am? Guys! She’s out!” Lauren heard the thinner of the group yelling for her friends to come help The 4 of them lifted her to a sitting position and tried to get her to respond. Eventually Lauren started to come to and her breathing returned to normal.
“What happened? “ The dark haired one asked firmly,
“N-n-nothing. I-I-I don’t know. I was in the woods and I heard… I don’t know. I’m so sorry, I have no idea what came over me.” Lauren stuttered. Trying so hard to reign her emotions back in. “Nothing, I just lost track of time there and I guess I got myself spooked. I have quite the imagination. What are you guys doing here? Was there something you needed?”
“We came up to see if you were ok, we were doing a little night hiking and saw you running and we followed you.” The dark haired one said. Lauren thought she was lying but didn’t know why she thought that.
“I could use some wine honestly, would you 4 like some wine?” Lauren felt like she was drunk as she walked back to her back door, the short one linked her arm in Lauren’s and walked with her steadying her.
“Wine sounds nice, we have some back at camp, we could get ours and bring it back.” She told Lauren in a soothing voice. A mom voice.
“Nonsense. I always stock up in town, I have plenty. I’ll get a fire going and-”
“We can get the fire, you get the wine and Addy here will help you bring out the glasses.” The dark haired one gestured to the short one who smiled and headed toward the door to open it for Lauren.
Lauren had 2 wine glasses and used regular glass cups for everyone else. She grabbed a couple bottles of red wine she’d gotten clearanced out after Halloween, the bottle had a blurry outline of trees and Lauren had felt it looked so magical she’d bought 6. Of course it wasn’t her favorite so now seemed like a good time to try to offload a little.
“I’m Lauren by the way, I know that’s Addy, who are the rest of you?” Lauren asked as she and Addy passed out glasses and poured wine in front of the fire.
“I’m Sara. “ The dark haired one said taking a generous drink from her cup
“I’m Therese.” The blond smiled and waved,
“I’m Rian.” The thin one said, pronouncing it Ree-ann.
“Is this a girls trip? I hope I didn’t mess anything up.” Lauren asked, pulling her blanket from the house tight around her. The fire was nice and warm but not warm enough to fend off the November chill.
“You didn’t mess anything up, honestly we were hoping to speak with you anyway. We knew Jim fairly well, I guess as well as you can know someone you only see 3 times a year. He had a pretty good idea of what he’d signed up for when he started but we got the feeling you didn’t and we were curious.” Sara said, watching Lauren’s face intently.
“I guess I don’t. I’m not sure what you mean.” Lauren said, wondering if they were crazy. The witchy types who came out here to dance naked in front of a fire and sing before going back home to suburbs and corporate lives with toddlers and teenagers. Lauren had dealt with those types over the summer but not very many.
“Well how did you get the job?” Therese asked, spinning the wine in her glass like she’d already had a few before they started.
“A friend of a friend. I was looking to make some changes in my life and he thought I would be a good fit here.”
“The Keeper?” Sara asked, leaning forward.
“I don’t think so. He just seemed like a regular guy. Who is the Keeper? “ Lauren asked nervously. The woods looked darker and it occurred to her that she didn’t know if she could beat them back in the house if she wanted to run. Then she remembered the Keeper comment from her dream, now hazy but still there.
“The Keeper doesn’t do a whole lot from what I can tell, not directly I mean. He just keeps information and contacts who he needs. He got Jim hired on, we don’t know much about him, we’ve personally not seen him ourselves. We’re not sure if he changes every so often but as far as we know it’s been the same person always. These woods are full of magic you see and not all of it is good magic. “ Sara explained. “We come out 3 times a year to make a blood sacrifice to Eglas. He or She, is a … something. Hungry mostly. Instead of one person we use 4 or 5 sometimes. Same amount of blood and no one dies. Occasionally one person will donate more for a favor but it’s not often.”
“I’m sorry, what?” Lauren said dumbly.
“He/She said they came to visit you last night. They said that you didn’t know much about your job. Eglas seemed very angry so we came to help you” Rian told her.
“There’s not much to your job. You keep the grounds maintained and then you make sure that we are able to do our work. I don't know what else is in the woods but I know about Eglas. My family has for at least a century come out and offered blood to keep Eglas satisfied. When they started settling the area, they disturbed a lot of spirits. Eglas was curious and found the taste of human blood to be… good I guess. Eglas would go into homes and take people, in the beginning it was a lot. Most families fled the area, but the ones who stayed came to Eglas one night and offered to give him what he wanted if he backed off. Or she, really Eglas has no real gender. It’s a fairy or demon, I’m not sure. Either way, Eglas was satisfied with a person a year but that got old quickly, not a lot of people lining up to do that obviously, they really weren’t getting a lot out of that deal back then, they could farm the land peacefully and that was it. One day a young farmer offered himself but when it came time he talked Eglas into changing the deal, a little from the strongest men in town. Eglas got the best there was and it was willingly. Eglas threw in the part about 3 times a year since the body wasn't included in the deal. That’s the lore anyway.” Sara told her story well, moving her hands and body, changing her pitch like a natural born storyteller.
“I think fairy because it makes the most sense with the woods and the deal making. You don’t have to believe us yet, you will eventually, but we come out here and do our ceremony and leave.” Addy told her.
“That sounds, nice.” Lauren said hesitantly. She drank more and could already feel the events of the afternoon fuzzing away.
“He’ll come to you again tonight, you’ll know who he is now. “ Therese said, smiling nicely.
“And you’ve done your ceremony already?” Lauren asked, trying to see if there were cuts visible. The girls nodded and Addy pulled her pants down showing off a long cut on her thigh. Lauren hissed through her teeth at the sight of it.
“Oh it’s not so bad. It hurts but it always heals quickly like it was never there. “ Addy assured her.
“Jim knew about this? “ Lauren asked, remembering a note in the binder about them being .
disturbing or something
“Yes, he did.. He knew before he started though. It kept him safe. We were a little worried that leaving you to the wolves so to speak, that you wouldn’t survive.” Rian explained.
“I’m afraid I’ve worn myself out. I think I’ll go to bed.” Lauren said, getting up carefully. The women were nice company and Lauren couldn’t think of the last time she had sat around the fire with anyone, but the conversation made her nervous. They looked at each other and nodded.
“We leave early tomorrow but I’ll leave my card on your door, you can call if you need anything.” Sara assured her.
Lauren didn’t get into bed as much as she collapsed into it. Her legs ached already and she knew that she wasn’t getting around much tomorrow. Between the wine and adrenaline wearing off, Lauren was able to fall asleep quickly.
She was out in the woods again. She must be dreaming because she wasn’t hurting.
“Do you know who I am?” The creature asked in her head again. Lauren couldn’t see the creature but didn’t feel the need to look for it either, just stood waiting.
“Eglas.” Lauren answered out loud. There was a chittering sound that somehow sounded pleased.
“Smart woman. I have been watching you.”
“I’d prefer you didn’t.” Lauren said dryly.
“You have questions.” Eglas stated.
“I can find answers.”
“I can give you answers if you ask me. It’s easy.” Eglas encouraged.
“Nothing is ever free and I have no intention of indebting myself to you. Accidentally or otherwise.” Lauren said, making herself clear. Eglas chuckled out loud and Lauren heard a swooshing through the trees. Lauren involuntarily shuddered.
“Have it your way, but you know where to find me.” Eglas said.
Lauren woke up the next morning as sore as she thought she would be. She managed to drag herself out of bed and to the bathroom and pulled on sweats that could pass as clothes. She thought that was the advantage of getting older, no one expected as much fashion wise. Lauren considered sitting on the stairs to go down but pushed through each painful step until she was in the kitchen. Ibuprofen and a freezer meal with a bottle of wine and she headed to the living room. She’d be close enough to answer any visitors if they came but she could sleep on the couch or watch tv. Lauren couldn’t find anything interesting on tv, or not enough to block out the clear dream she’d had last night that seemed to stick to her. When the ibuprofen kicked in she felt good enough to sit up, she looked around the room and noticed the bookshelf was getting dusty again. There were books on the shelf that had come with the place but Lauren had never really looked at them before. After flipping through movie selections and still not seeing anything she could find any interest in she got up and wandered over to the shelf. Reading the titles she figured out why she hadn’t wanted to read them before. History of the area mostly. Then a book about ghosts in the area, that sounded like it could be interesting. When Lauren was a kid she devoured books about ghosts. Next to it was a book without a title, it was slim and blended with the other books well. Lauren grabbed it as well, mostly curious. She settled back on the couch and pulled the blanket around her. The book was interesting, the usual ladies in the woods and drowned men, children warning of danger. Then there was a chapter that mentioned Elgas.
TRANCHLURE
He arose from the mud, hungry,ravenous.
He crept through the trees and on the strange mist observant first.
When the people came and Eglas fed He found a way to satiate the hunger and then slept for years and was awoken
He massacred the nearest town and those who lived in the woods found a way to drive him back into the caves, not dead but mostly sleeping until someone falls into his cavern, never to return.
Was it about Eglas? She didn’t think so.
Lauren went into the office and grabbed the binder that mentioned the Helgas. Even the binder was coded though obviously.
With her limited knowledge though she was thinking that they were groups of worshippers coming to celebrate differently. Lauren wondered if she could order some books on astrology to understand it better.
She opened up another book on fairies, but this had highlighted sections. A recipe for some kind of tea to see fairies. In the side there were some notes on things to leave out around the forest, offerings for the spirits. Lauren traced the handwriting and wondered if it was Jim who had written it or someone else. Apples was what it said.
There was a ring telling her someone was here. Lauren got up again carefully and headed in to the office. A man with a sleepy toddler on his shoulder stood waiting. He looked haggard and nervous.
“Cabin?” Lauren asked softly.
“Uhm, yes please.” He said.
“Any preference? You kind of have your pick this weekend.”
“Something toward the back.”
“Alright, cabin 15, more towards the middle honestly but it branches off so it’s a little more secluded?”
“Yes sounds fine. ‘
Lauren handed him his keys and a small map and sent him on his way, she then hobbled back to her couch. Sighing, she went back to the original book and started a story about a woman who had gotten lost in the forest and run into a sprit offering wishes. A wispy in between soul. Lauren noted that the spirit could be found by a landmark she knew. Slowly she started to doze.
Again she found herself barefoot in the forest.
“Hello again.” He or she whispered in her head
“Hello. Why am I here again?” Lauren asked dreamily.
“Because I am a generous soul. The man came today to ask for a favor from the fairies, he bought his offerings but he failed to realize he had put his daughter in danger. She’s gifted, she’s why he knows to come here. She’s also hit the magician and witches' radar, he needs protection.”
“Ah, and why do you care? There’s always a price.”
“I’ll protect her, for a price, obviously, just a little blood offering. From him if that isn’t clear. I need you to go and tell him my offer before his daughter is spirited away. Awaken now.”
Lauren woke up suddenly, she was annoyed and irate at being ordered around. But she got up and found a card that Sara had offered her the night before. Nervously she rang the number.
“Hello?” Sara answered.
“It’s Lauren, are you far away? “ Lauren asked, wondering how her rational world had changed in such a short span of time.
“Not far at all, maybe a mile.”
“Eglas, came to me, he wants to offer his services to a new camper here.”
“We’ll turn back around immediately.”
A few hours later Rian stood at the office smiling.
“It’s been taken care of, I didn’t realize what you being here meant. You’re the new Keeper.” Rian looked on at her with admiration.
“I don’t think so.” Lauren said firmly.
“You are, whether you know it or not, that’s why you’re here. Eglas might’ve told you that was why he was coming to you but he told us.” Lauren didn’t like the culty feeling she was getting off of Rian right now.
“Well, I don’t know what that means, I’m a caretaker, a well paid caretaker. Not a Keeper for things I don’t believe in. “
“I don't know much about the Keepers, but I have a very strong feeling that you should find the person who sent you here and ask some questions. I don’t know as much as the other girls about the magic in the forest but I do know that the fairies have an affinity for ceremony.”
After a few days of thinking, Lauren finally made a call to Eric. Eric was due up today.
Eric came to the regular front door instead of the office door.
“You’re the Keeper.” Lauren said without saying hello.
“Yes. Jim was a Keeper as well, but he… Well he isn’t anymore. You are up for the position obviously. I’m assuming you brokered a deal for someone out there if you figured it out. Which is accepting the position.”
“I don’t know about any of this. Eglas came and told me a girl was in trouble. I offered protection through another group that I know offers blood sacrifices. I feel like I’m too old to be any sort of Keeper. “
“Well it’s in your blood. That’s part of the reason you were chosen. The night you came to me I had a day of signs, then I heard about Jim. I was thinking of sending another established Keeper to this area and then I saw you. One big sign. I watched you for a few days and then I made the decision to send you up here. You have done very well so far. “
“Is there like a meeting for this? An instructional booklet? “
“I’m guessing Jim left a book of notes behind. He was good about notes in his day and when he realized he was coming to an end he told me he would leave things behind for whoever came next. I’d just look for books and binders.”
“But I don’t understand it.”
“Well you’ll have to learn fast”
“Rian said there was likely a ceremony.”
“There is an introduction. You’ll spill your blood by a great tree that connects all of the mountain. You’ll be recognized and the creatures will know to come to you.”
“What kind of fairy tale is this?”
“The kind that you’re a part of. “
“If it’s in my blood shouldn’t I know something?”
“I guess not.”
Lauren stood in front of the tree on the next full moon, freezing and nervous. The Helgas joined her for emotional support. Lauren held a sharp knife and sliced her hand to let the blood flow over the ground. Energy started from the ground and worked its way up her feet and through her body. With her feet firmly planted it felt as if she came up out of her body and rose above the trees, like looking through a microscope if she concentrated on a certain area she could see everything going on. At first she thought she saw people, but it was much too late for that. They were creatures. They roamed and played. I could see everything.
Welcome to Camp Thellgar

This was just a random thought I had recently. I have a 1 and 3 year old. Since they were born, I'm ashamed to admit that I've been spending most of my time glued to my phone. First it started with breastfeeding and contact naps, then it gave way to me feeling like my phone is my only safe space. I feel like I can't even get up and walk without being blocked. I get up, I get tripped or walked into by one of my kids. I try to do the dishes, my son sits on the dishwasher door when it's open and he pulls the dishes out (which also drives up my anxiety that he's going to break the door). I try to do the laundry, my kids tag team so that one tries to pull the clothes out of the dryer and scatter them everywhere while the other one slams the laundry room doors against my back over and over again, sometimes crushing my fingers. I try to wipe down the dining room table, my son puts his hands into the cleaner and I have to stop to get it off of him. I try to sweep the floor, and they always try to snatch the dust pan or broom away from me and I have to chase them down to get it back so I can complete my task. I recently tried to sit down and paint while my kids were drawing and I had to just give up and walk away because my daughter wanted the paint I was using so she threw a fit. I was organizing recipes in a binder earlier today, and my daughter got into some art supplies and made a huge mess while I was doing that. I can't take a phone call without them screaming, I can't do any work on my computer without them trying to damage it or get in the way. I feel paralyzed. The only time I feel comfortable is when I'm sitting and doom scrolling on my phone. They have TONS of fun toys, I set up activities for them, etc. But they always drop what they are doing when they see me trying to get anything done.

TL, DR: Doctors suck, eliminating trigger foods has helped me manage symptoms
In order to encourage some exchange on this sub I thought I could share my whole functional dyspepsia “journey”. Maybe some of you can learn from my experiences or get some encouragement (I would also be happy if I can get some advice here and there).
It’s gonna be quite a long post so don’t say I didn’t warn ya. Also sorry for bad English.
It started at Christmas 2019. The day after Christmas I had such bad stomach-aches that I couldn’t stand up, so instead of visiting my grandma I stayed in bed for a few days until it eventually got better. I don’t really remember much of the time after but around that time my symptoms began. I started belching after my meals and would constantly feel full and have bad stomach pain.
I’m a skinny guy and tried hard to gain weight at that time and ignored those symptoms as best as I could (I think I might have developed a bit of an eating disorder). My stomach pain eventually got so bad that I had to miss out on at least half of my social events because I would just lie in bed and try to sleep to somehow get over the pain. I eventually also lost a lot of weight (probably due to not being able to eat very much). My mood got very bad, and I developed a very short fuse (I am usually a calm guy). This might also have been linked to some depression because of social isolation due to covid (but what do I know). One day (about a year after it started) my gf finally convinced me to visit a doctor.
The first gastroenterologist I visited didn’t listen to much of what I said and just told me I should go to a nutritionist (which I would have to pay for myself). Since I was eating healthy most of the time I didn’t go (I also don’t smoke and drink no alcohol). Also I wanted to know what’s wrong with me and get a proper diagnosis instead of some potential band-aid fix that would only conceal the underlying problem. So after some encouragement of my gf I made another appointment at a different gastroenterologist.
After a few months of waiting the second doctor at least got some proper tests done – ultrasound, lactose and fructose breath tests, blood and stool tests. Everything came back negative (of course). A few months later I got an endoscopy – doc told me I had a mild antral gastritis (no helicobacter) and prescribed me PPI (Pantoprazole). After the endoscopy I had a week of terrible stomach pain but at least I had a diagnosis and a solution for my problem. I started taking 40 mg for 2 weeks and then went down to 20 mg. It didn’t do shit. I took pantoprazole over 4 months and had no improvements whatsoever. When I stopped taking it, I had super bad heartburn and went trough 3 weeks of hell with constant throat pain caused by acid reflux.
After that I got prescribed domperidone (prokinetic) and some other stuff (Gaviscon, simethicone) but stopped after 2 weeks because it didn’t help and the chance of getting a sudden heart attack was a bit too scary of a side effect. At my next appointment the doc told me he couldn’t help me anymore. I was pretty desperate at that time and tried every over the counter supplement I could get – with no improvements. After some time I started to check the gastritis subreddit and decided to try the gastritis diet. I also bought the gastritis healing book and followed every step as best as I could. No wheat, no soy, no dairy, no spices, no nuts, no sweets – you name it. I ate small meals of rice, chicken and some steamed vegetables (with almost no seasoning).
I also started a food diary. After 3 weeks I felt way better. I had a feeling that my upper stomach was “swollen” and when it went away I spent half the night crying because I felt so relieved. I felt fine after most meals but had some burning sensation left after few hours of eating. A friend recommended me to try riopan (some physical acid binder). That was a bad mistake – the swollen feeling came back instantly that night and I had to start over again. I guess I don’t have to mention that I wasn’t too well mentally at that point. But I was desperate and motivated by the thought of that fuckin pain to go away some day. Eating very few and unenjoyable meals was hard – probably the hardest thing I had done so far in my life. That might sound stupid but the combination of constant hunger and pain despite only eating bland, tasteless food was difficult. I also started to lose even more weight and got severely underweight and I couldn’t sleep at night. I was constantly freezing and sleeping most of the day. I couldn’t work properly anymore and literally sat at my desk doing nothing at work for hours hoping that no one would notice or that I wouldn’t have to stand up (moving would hurt my stomach and felt like it was too much for me). At some point I started to look so bad that my boss told me I looked terrible and told me I should go to a doctor and call in sick for at least a few weeks until I got better (god bless her).
I still was in pain oftentimes, but it was somehow different and that was enough to motivate me to continue. I started to do yoga every day, chew my food extremely well and spent half my days sleeping. I forced myself to do a small walk everyday since it usually helped a little with the symptoms. I also bought tons of supplements (literally tried everything that could somehow help).
And it worked – veeeeery slowly I started to feel better. Every few weeks I would get a flare up that sent me straight back to bed for days (or weeks) but I started identifying the trigger foods. The flare ups would also get shorter and a little less bad every time.
Then I had an appointment with the next gastroenterologist. He told me that my “gastritis” was not a gastritis at all and that a slight redness was normal. Without any further tests he diagnosed me with nerd (non-erosive reflux disease) and fructose intolerance. He also told me my diet was a hoax and that my PPI dose had just been too low to significantly make a difference in my stomach pH. I thought he was a terrible doctor but he also made some fair points about my gastritis. I got home with a very bad mental state and ate some stuff that I probably shouldn’t have and spent another week with bad pain.
At this point I knew no one was going to help me. I started doing some research myself and came to the conclusion that functional dyspepsia was the most likely explanation (it also perfectly described my symptoms). Few weeks later I went to the next gastroenterologist – he told me all diagnostics were done and confirmed I had FD. I asked if he would prescribe me amitryptiline but he told me that he didn’t feel comfortable without a psychiatrist and he would rather start with psychotherapy first. As I was feeling much better with my diet (and knowing it would take months until I got therapy) I told myself I would try managing the symptoms with the diet first.
A month later I had an appointment with another gastroenterologist (this is very recent). He plans to do colonoscopy and pH-metry aswell as glucose breath test.
And that’s pretty much it so far. Approx. 90 % of my symptoms are gone right now – simply by avoiding trigger foods (a list of my trigger foods is below) and eating slowly and calm. No fullness, no belching, a little pain here and there but its very manageable. I also gained back 10 kgs in 3 months. I found some recipes which taste nice and every few weeks I feel the courage to try some new foods – even bad flare ups have become pretty manageable now (they last only around 3 days). Even though I am much better it still is very straining – I have to cook for myself every day and the pain is not gone for good. I cant ever eat at any social event or in restaurants (although I had some sushi recently which wasn’t too bad for my stomach (yay)). That stupid pain along with throat pain caused by acid reflux that I get every now and then is mentally very straining.
Doctors haven’t done shit for me so far and I don’t even know if I want to do a colonoscopy as I don’t believe that it will give any results. I’ve read some papers that show some promising results using antibiotics (rifaximine) and I might try that in the future. I’m also thinking about starting therapy (even though I never considered myself a person with depression).
That’s pretty much it. I have FD now since 4,5 years. I have been doing the diet for 7 months now. I hope that this terrible disease goes away some day. And even though there is 0 evidence for it a part of me believes that if I continue to do the diet that I will someday be completely symptom free. Hope that maybe this is helpful to anyone.
My trigger foods: Almond milk, potatoes, onions, eggs, wheat, soy, peanuts, tomatoes, dairy products (probably forgot some, but also haven’t tried a lot of foods).

Hi everyone!
As you probably saw on my previous post, i picked up a beautiful baby boy on Saturday, 5/4/24. He was 3mo old on 5/1.
Anyway: in the binder the breeder gave me, it has a recipe to feed him about 1-2 times a day and i was curious of what you thought of this:
1. 4.4 lb of chicken thighs with bone
2. 2 lb of beef (your choice cut)
3. 7 oz of raw chicken liver (can be bought in packages)
4. 14 oz of raw chicken hearts
a. if you can’t find hearts, sub with more chicken meat AND add 4000 mg of Dr.
Tim’s Taurine Topper ( made in the USA) , if you do find hearts then we would add
500 mg
5. 4 raw egg yolks (yolks only)
6. Supplement (optional) recommended dose of Missing Link Feline Superfood
Supplement Powder from Amazon (manufactured in the USA)
7. Supplement (optional) recommended dose of Nordic Naturals
Is this something i should start thinking about? Not gonna lie: it kinda grosses me out to handle all that, as a vegetarian and animal lover. (not that i wont do it, but still)
Hes currently eating this:
Holistic Health Extension Grain Free Turkey & Salmon crunchy food.
What are your thoughts on this?

Accidentally bought another bag when I already had one half-full.
I don't often bake sweet goods (but would be interested in those recipes anyway if they're easy!) -- mostly I just use almond flour as a binder for meatloaf, fish cakes, and fryer coatings in general, but those are small amounts.
Any ideas to use up this excess almond flour? Thanks in advance!

Hi, for those who still keep recipes physically, has anyone ever use expandable file box? I'm planning to store the recipes I've collected and printed (A4 paper) into this box but I wonder how do you keep the papers from bending? What kind of paper do you use and what thickness? I have a large binder but they've became quite heavy that it's quite hard to carry around. I just want to keep the box on the kitchen table. Thanks in advance for those who help!! 🙏🏻🙏🏻
This is the one I have in mind. https://www.amazon.com/Expanding-Accordian-Organizer-Expandable-Accordion/dp/B097Q2CG4K

NOTE: This recipe is NOT FP friendly. That being said, I have used it in FPs with zero damage for over a year. I'm talking cheap Noodler's Charlie pens and Jinhao's, not Sailor's and MBs. Do not use in FPs!!! I have had good results dipping this ink with cheap FPs as they hold more ink than a dip pen, but the flow is too light most of the time.
*This recipe was originally posted as a comment in another thread.*
This is the simple recipe. The original goal was to produce an ink with natural locally available materials in the event of societal collapse.
You need a tannic acid source. Enter the pomegranates. I live in Arizona and my neighbor has a pomegranate tree, yet they hate the fruit. They tossed the entire crop over thier fence when they went bad on the tree. This recipe calls for old pomegranates harvested in December or January. I used about 12 baseball sized pomegranates.
You need an iron source. I used roofing nails/tacks salvaged from a neighbor's shed when they moved. Make sure they are uncoated and unpainted otherwise it will mess up the ink. I also used a railroad spike, scoured clean of rust and dirt.
You need an acid source. The acid I can produce from available materials would be vinegar, or acetic acid. If I had to, I could produce this as an after product of alcohol production using mesquite pods or cactus fruit. I used commercial vinegar.
You need a pure water source. You can use distilled water. I used rain water, triple filtered. Tap water or drinking water contains additives that can mess up the ink.
Prepare your ingredients. Tannic acid source Chop the whole pomegranates into 1/2 inch chunks. Place all 12 pomegranates into one gallon of the pure water in a large container, preferably glass or stainless steel. It should seal to keep out air. Use four 32 ounce mason jars with new lids like I did. Old lids can corrode and mess up the ink.
Combine Iron source and acid source. In a fifth mason jar add a single railroad spike or 1/4 jar of roofing nails. Fill the rest of the jar with vinegar. Do this all on the same day. This will create Iron Acetate which will be used with the tannic acid from the pomegranates to create the reaction on paper, with oxygen in the air, that we desire.
Store all components in a cool dry place for 90 days. Shake or agitate the jars daily and look for leaks. Mold growth in the pomegranate material is great.and actually makes the ink darker by producing Gallotannic acid Use this time to collect and process your binder material. You can use honey. In a bad situation I'd use reduced mesquite sap. I used commercial food grade Gum Arabic powder. There is also a material you can obtain from decomposed whipped egg whites, but that is a recipe for another day.
After the components have aged. Pour all four jars of pomegranate material into a large cook pot and let simmer for a few hours just below boiling temps. Stir frequently. Let the solution cool to room temp and let the solids settle at the bottom. Here comes the hard part. Wash the used jars and get new lids if there is any damage. You need a large funnel and a bunch of coffee filters. Place a filter in the funnel. Using a turkey baster siphon off the clear liquid and squirt into the funnel and allow to filter. Once the filter clogs and the drips are one second apart replace the filter. Once there is no more clear liquid seeping from the material you can place the mash in a clean white cotton flour sack towel and squeeze more out into the cook pot. Allow to settle and start siphoning the clear liquid. Note: this is a lesson learned from doing it the hardest way. Learn from my pain.
You now have nearly a gallon of pomegranate solution. Clean the cook pot and pour the solution into it after recording the amount you have. You want to low simmer until 50 percent reduction has occurred. Let the solution cool and pour into two mason jars. Now you have concentrated pomegranate extract. Another hard lesson learned.
Now it's time to test your components and develop your ratio for mixing. Using two clean eye droppers, I use disposable plastic pippettes, add one drop of pomegranate solution and one drop of iron acetate solution to a shot glass. Notice the reaction. It may do nothing or get slightly darker. You have a 1:1 solution pom:iron. Add one drop of pomegranate solution and observe results each time. With my recipe the ideal ratio was 5:1. Once you add a drop and it doesn't get darker you got it. Particulates my precipitate out during this process. This means too much iron in the ratio. This usually happens between 2:1 and 4:1 and should clear up when your ratio is good. If you add a drop of pomegranate solution and it lightens the result, you lack iron. Repeat the test and use one drop less and that is your ratio.
For this recipe let's say the ideal ratio is 5:1. Use a dip pen and a few different samples of paper write the same word on each Peice dipping the pen each time. Let the paper slips rest for one hour. You should notice the ink darken for the first 30 seconds as it dries. This is the desired reaction creating a ferrogallotannic oxide pigment on the paper fibers. This is usually pretty water resistant, but less so than using oak galls and ferrous sulfate.
You will notice the ink isn't black. Pomegranate and iron acetate ink will never be black. The vinegar is too weak to hold enough iron, and the tannic acid in the pomegranates isn't concentrated enough. This is a good nuff ink.
Your ink should dry with a medium to dark gray similar to a number two pencil. If it is light retest the ratio, but use two drops of iron solution and start at 5:2 and add drops of pomegranate solution till it gets where it needs to be. You could also reduce the pomegranates solution by another 25% on the stove and retest.
Now your ink base ratio has been established for your ingredients you need to add a binder. Start small. Make a batch of ink based on your ratio, say 5ml of pomegranate and 1 ml of iron. Mix well. Add a tiny bit of binder, like the tip of a knife (powdered gum arabic), and mix thouroughly. Your initial goal is to increase surface tension so swirl your container and watch what the liquid does. You are looking for smooth sheeting not many small runnels like water. If using honey, be aware that too much will make your ink sticky even when dry. If this happens, add more base a few ml at a time until this stops. For 6ml of test ink I found about one knife tip per ml to work. Write a few lines of text and let it dry. It will dry a bit slower with binder but it allows the ink to settle on the paper thicker without spreading resulting in darker text.
Tips. This is a 1000 plus year old recipe. It has draw backs. This ink if left exposed to air will darken as it oxidizes. This gives a darker color but it loses all water vastness and sludge will form as the iron precipitates out. I tried adding vinegar to reuptake the iron, but it doesn't work. My advice is to keep the components seperate and mix a small batch as needed, say 10ml of pomegranate and 2ml of iron and binder to taste. You should have 64 ounces or so of ink so do not be afraid to throw it out when sludge develops. Using a speedball steel nib makes the ink darker because the ink is acid and takes iron from the nib. Obviously this degrades the nib over time but they are cheap. I use turkey feather quills and stainless steel nibs from old fountain pens in addition to steel nibs. Rinse and wipe your nibs as soon as you are finished writing to make them last longer. I like gum Arabic because even if you use too much, it just sheens and doesn't get sticky.
Any questions?

Today I'll be making hot dogs again. The recipe I use is from a well known YouTube "chef" and it calls for "binder flour" (72 gms per 6 lbs meat). However, I had bought a product called "Accord Powder" which is a phosphate and supposedly helps retain moisture in sausage products. The instructions say 0.3% Accord to meat weight. For 6 lbs of meat that's 8 gms.
My first batch of dogs were unbelievably tasty, but as dry as the Sahara. I then checked the YouTuber's written recipe and discovered that unlike the 60 ml of water he uses in the video, his website recipe uses 180 ml. So in my 2nd batch I upped the water amount. Dogs were still tasty but still dry. I made sure that the fat content was adequate but if you squeezed the hot dog not a drop of moisture would come out.
So now I'm wondering if Accord is supposed to be used solo or if another binder like milk powder should be used with it? Accord states it helps retain moisture so maybe I should just add more water? Has anyone actually used Accord? Are there any binders other than dry milk powder as it is not readily available here in the Philippines?
I really don't want my 3rd batch of hot dogs to be dry again. Any help will be gratefully appreciated.

I have moderate CFS and have been working on a homemade dog food recipe for quite a while that isn’t too hard and takes about 45 minutes from beginning to end (I split it up over 2 days, see notes). I started it using dry beans (slightly cheaper) but that was far too much work for my moderate CFS.
This makes about 22-25 cups of food for about $15 where I live when chicken breast is on sale.
I still cube up my chicken and carrots but may pay the butcher later down the road and use baby carrots as my CFS progresses.

• · 4 lb chicken breast cubed
• · 6 oz can tomato paste, low or no sodium if you can find it
• · 32 oz salt free chicken broth
• · 4 cans of salt free beans, drained and cleaned in a colander (any type is good like black, kidney, lima, etc.
• · 1 lb carrots cubed
• · 3 apples, I use any red that are on sale
• · 2 cups cooked rice

Cook cubed chicken in large frying on med/hi, stir as needed
Add carrots, beans, chicken broth and tomato paste to large stock pot, stir to mix it up on high, turn to simmer once boiling, simmer 10 minutes, stirring occasionally.
At 10 minutes of simmer, chicken should be done. Add chicken (strained) and apples to the stock pot, return to boil then simmer 10 more minutes, stir occasionally.
Take pot off stove and add the rice and stir. The rice does not have significant nutritional value but is a wonderful binder soaking up the liquid.
Cool for a couple of hours and package however works best.
NOTES:

• I use quart freezer bags and they hold 5 cups of food each (not sure how that works but does). My dog eats 1-2 cups a day plus a bit of kibble so it never goes bad after removing from the freezer.
• Don’t forget to use the liquid from heating up the chicken to pour over dry food if you also use that.
• A couple of additions I use from time to time are fresh greens when my garden is going like beans or peas. Add that when adding carrots and beans. If using canned just drain, clean and add when adding the chicken. I’ve also added 1-2 tsp ground eggshell for calcium from time to time.
• To make it easier, cube everything up the day before.
• I hope some of you slight to moderate CFS sufferers find this helpful. It is much cheaper than buying already made fresh dog food.