I’ve suspected for years that something was wrong with me internally, but wrote off a lot of my own symptoms in denial and mistrust in most doctors. More strange symptoms have started to appear recently, and my research pointed to endo. Brought concerns to my new OB who seems highly competent and validated the expertise I have on my body as well as what I’ve learned from research. She agreed that it’s all consistent with endo, prescribed me the minipill after running thru all the options, because that’s what I wanted to try first for my symptoms, and we scheduled the ultrasound for today.
I’m nervous for a few reasons. #1, I feel like my symptoms aren’t as “bad” compared to what most women with endo describe. Maybe I just have a “mild” level of the condition, if I have it? So that’s making me doubt, but I have had heavy bleeding the entire time I’ve had a period. I’m talking twice the “normal” range of blood loss, and basically every 3 weeks. Those 2 factors are already exhausting, combined with pain, frequent nausea and difficulty eating otherwise, recurring yeast infections, and irregular bleeding. Lately my depression has also been getting worse, I can’t keep weight on, and my moods are all over the place.
I’m also reading now that a lot of people miss their diagnosis with an ultrasound (often depending on whether or not the tech specializes in vaginal ultrasound readings) but get it confirmed once they go back for a lap. So reason #2 I'm nervous is that they might not find anything today, at least not on my ovaries, and we're gonna have to draw out this process even more to figure out what's wrong with me. I'm already missing a bunch of work just for these appointments, thank god we have great insurance and my bosses have been very understanding.
I'm just rambling at this point. I just want a confirmed yes or no diagnosis already-- I know something is wrong with my body and it's not a new intuition. I might still ask for the lap if they don't find anything today, just to be sure. Either way, I'll be trying the minipill for a while. Best case scenario here is that I just have chronically imbalanced progesterone and estrogen, and the consequences of that mimic endo. And the good thing is that these concerns have kind of spooked me awake into taking more intentional and prompt care of my health.

I’m so frustrated. I am prescribed both Adderall and more recently an antacid. I pretty much NEED to take them at the same time so staggering them isn’t really an option at the moment. But you guys, those antacids make my ADHD meds hellish for me. They intensify Adderall’s effects so harshly and have caused me to feel side effects I have never experienced in my 15ish years of being on them. It’s getting so bad that I’m literally starting to contemplate what’s worse: gastritis/duodenitis relief or ADHD relief? I view both of my conditions with equal importance.
I spoke with my GI doctor and have tried other antacids, but there’s really nothing I can do. Doesn’t matter if I take them with or without certain foods and beverages. Nothing I have tried helps these side effects. I haven’t talked to my psychiatrist yet, but I’m pretty sure they won’t have a solution. Adderall has always been effective for me and well tolerated. I don’t want to switch ADHD meds, and from what I’ve learned so far is that doing so wouldn’t change my situation.
I can’t believe some people willingly use this combo to potentiate the effects of their ADHD meds, especially without doctor supervision. I can understand MAYBE if it’s a super low dose and the person is unable to get a dosage increase, but even then I’m like wtf based off of my experience. But I do know that every body is different and people will always have varying experiences.
The only thing that kind of helps (BARELY) is propanolol, which I was prescribed before antacids for anxiety. It worked great when it was combined with just Adderall. Didn’t decrease the efficacy of my meds but took away a lot of the physical symptoms of anxiety that Adderall would occasionally exacerbate.
Sorry this post is going nowhere and is kind of ranty. I guess I just need to vent. Obviously, if anyone else is going through this or went through this, please chime in! I’m just really frustrated.

In reintroduction and for sure messed up some stuff (dealing with stress from medical procedures so was more lax with reintroduction / trying not to stress about it on top of receiving some confusing suggestions)… will probably have to restart but also I think I have maybe figured out some stuff by messing up!
Prior to this I have been reacting negatively to every single fodmap group. I also developed stomach pain during reintroduction I never had prior to fodmap diet (yes was following the diet strictly at this time) , that didn’t seem to be correlated with the foods I was reintroducing (for example even a week or more in between reintroducing fodmap groups I would still be experiencing stomach pain). The pain didn’t correlate to my bloating (the initial symptom I had coming into this).
My dietitian suggested that I introduce a pro/pre biotic to see if this would help me. I emailed monash and they suggested to wait until after reintroduction.
As a result I thought would be good idea to start with low fodmap amounts of things like Sourkrout. I found two low Fodmap fermented foods in Whole Foods (one with green cabbage that didn’t have garlic or onion and one was beet krout which just had carrot, beet, and red cabbage). I was fine with the green cabbage one… but unclear if it caused me bloating or not but then I had an extreme reaction to the beet krout. I realized I was having a good amount of Avacado (in low formaps amounts) and papaya and upon researching am suspecting a potential histamine intolerance given the combination of these things might lead to histamine overload.
What is so confusing is that since adding in the fermented foods my stool improved drastically and my stomach pain hasn’t been present for over a week (no changes in things like caffeine intake, fiber intake etc).
Anyone have a similar experience??
I have a feeling I need to trial low histamine diet but I’m also confused by these conflicting effects . The brain fog is truly debilitating (feels like I took a bunch of drugs and I’m in a video game… not helpful for my job). I have been experiencing the brain fog intermittently for the past year or so and it does seem to be related to what I’m eating . I also have a condition (MS) that can effect things like this but my Ms specialists believe my food intolerances are a big driver is these symptoms.
I also noticed that I have dry spot on my two fingers/ knuckles that began around the time of my gut dysbiosis (at least a year or two ago). This also aligns with histamine intolerance and does not align with ms.
Fodmap seems to help with the bloat but not everything
If anyone has experienced anything of this nature please let me know! Any resources are welcomed to

Hi!
I am a 32F , 5’7” tall, about 130lbs, Caucasian, live in Canada. Current medications include tylenol/ibuprofen, prucalopride (for GI motility) and birth control. Attending regular physiotherapy for multiple conditions. Symptoms began around 2016 and have progressed since.
I have a pretty intolerable combination of symptoms at the moment - I’m seeing different specialists for each condition, but I’m wondering if there might be something connecting my symptoms that’s being missed. I really would welcome any ideas, because this absolutely sucks - life is coming to a standstill at this point.

• trigeminal nerve pain and numbness along the trigeminal distribution - this comes and goes but sticks around for days or weeks once it starts. Right side only…wildly painful
• increased migraine frequency - about 1-2 per month, used to get 1-2 per year
• chronic pelvic pain, more recently confirmed involvement of the pudendal nerve. Pain and periodic numbness along the PN distribution, mostly left side…also wildly painful!
• burning left shoulder / upper back pain, L side
• random numbness / tingling in lower limbs, both sides, not following any specific distribution that I can tell
• periods of mild urinary incontinence or retention
• chronic constipation, treatment resistant
• potentially endometriosis, adenomyosis - waiting for laparoscopy
• maxillary and mandibular recession and cant, tmj disorder both sides
• quite severe silent reflux
• waves of severe fatigue, flu like symptoms, systemic joint pain (elbows, wrists, knees hot, red, and painful) - was happening once per month and now less frequently, maybe once every 3 months
• Thygeson’s disease diagnosed in R eye

I had a brain mri without contrast that was normal except for a “T2 and FLAIR hyperintense focus within the right peritrigonal region measuring 9mm”. My understanding was that this wasn’t anything really notable. LumbaSacral MRI also normal, except for some wearing of the facet joints. Blood work is generally normal.
I realize I could definitely just be unlucky to have multiple things happening here (and I get that the stress of being sick with one condition could exacerbate another). But I don’t really have anyone who is looking at the big picture - is there any sign that there could be something going on connecting these symptoms?
Thanks for your insight!

I'm (31F) trying to get evaluated for ADHD because I recognise a lot of it's symptoms in myself, however there are some key markers which overlap with cPTSD (for me).
I am wondering how do you experience these two conditions simultaneously? How do their symptoms impact your life? How do you recognise they come from a trauma rather than ADHD? Or from both of course, that is also a possibility.
Examples of overlaps in me which could be both for different reasons are listed below, and I'm frustrated because it could be both, but lost because not sure how to move forward with treatment. Currently both cptsd and potentially adhd impact my everyday quality of life, but I tend to feel adhd even more so, the more I read about it.
-Emotional dysregulation (more during period, but percieved rejection can set it off) - strong feelings of anger, anxiety. Recognise it with executive dysfunction (adhd) + unresolved trauma and heightened reactivity to triggers (cptsd), not having examples due to neglect for self regulation during upbringing.
-Rejection sensitivity, because of CEN (childhood emotional neglect) and ADHD (rejection sensitive dysphoria)
-Repetitive behaviours: striving for control and structure for self regulation (adhd) + safety (trauma). Control could mean safety ik.
-Masking (adhd) with perfectionism and having developed perfectionism to be worthy of love towards emotionally neglectful/unavailable parental figure.
Sorry if the formatting is whack, I'm on mobile.

Ever had a restless night and couldn’t figure out why? The answer might be simpler than you think - it’s DEHYDRATION! 🌙💧
How does dehydration affect sleep? 😮
Dehydration often results in dryness in the mouth and nasal passages. This can be uncomfortable and disrupt your sleep. Plus, it might increase SNORING, affecting both your sleep and your partner’s! 😴😴
😟 What else could happen because of dehydration?
Dehydration can worsen sleep disorders. Conditions like sleep apnea can get worse with poor hydration. Dehydration can lead to thicker mucus and more obstructed airways, making breathing harder and potentially worsening sleep apnea symptoms. 😷🚫
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Nursing assignment writers cover a wide range of topics to help nursing students understand different aspects of healthcare. These topics are like pieces of a puzzle that come together to create a bigger picture of nursing practice. Let's explore some of these topics in more detail:

1. Patient Care: Nursing assignment writers often discuss patient care, which includes topics like bedside manner, administering medication, and monitoring vital signs. They teach students how to provide compassionate care while ensuring patient safety.
2. Health Promotion: Another important topic is health promotion, where writers explain strategies for promoting healthy behaviors and preventing illness. This might include discussions on nutrition, exercise, and disease prevention techniques.
3. Medical Conditions: Nursing assignment writers also cover various medical conditions, such as diabetes, heart disease, and mental health disorders. They help students understand the causes, symptoms, and treatment options for different illnesses.
4. Nursing Ethics: Ethics is a crucial aspect of nursing practice, and writers often delve into topics related to ethical decision-making, patient confidentiality, and professional conduct. They help students navigate complex ethical dilemmas they may encounter in their careers.
5. Evidence-Based Practice: Nursing assignment writers emphasize the importance of evidence-based practice, which involves using research findings to inform clinical decisions. They teach students how to critically evaluate research studies and apply evidence-based interventions in patient care.
6. Nursing Theory: Understanding nursing theory is essential for students to develop a solid foundation in nursing practice. Writers explain different nursing theories and their applications in clinical settings, helping students understand the underlying principles of nursing care.
7. Leadership and Management: Nursing assignment writers also cover topics related to leadership and management in healthcare settings. This may include discussions on delegation, conflict resolution, and quality improvement initiatives.
8. Cultural Competence: In today's diverse healthcare environment, cultural competence is essential for providing patient-centered care. Writers discuss topics related to cultural awareness, sensitivity, and competence, helping students learn how to effectively communicate and collaborate with patients from diverse backgrounds.
9. Legal Issues in Nursing: Nursing assignment writers address legal issues relevant to nursing practice, such as informed consent, documentation, and professional liability. They help students understand their legal responsibilities and how to practice within the boundaries of the law.
10. Professional Development: Finally, writers cover topics related to professional development, including continuing education, certification, and career advancement opportunities. They help students prepare for lifelong learning and growth in their nursing careers.

In summary, nursing assignment writers cover a diverse range of topics to provide comprehensive support to nursing students. By addressing these topics in their assignments, writers help students develop the knowledge, skills, and competencies needed to excel in their future nursing careers.

Trial Day 11
Katherine Jackson, Rebbie and Trent are at court.
Choreographer Travis Payne & Katherine Jackson spoke briefly in the courtroom before the jury came in. They seemed cordial
Travis Payne Testimony
AEG direct
Payne is wearing a black jacket with a gold emblem on the shoulders with the word "MJ" & a pair of wings
Payne said he was concerned about MJ missing rehearsals. He didn't know why he wasn't showing up, but MJ was also working on an album and a book
Payne said he did not think that Jackson had a problem abusing prescription medications. He acknowledged that Jackson missed rehearsals and he saw the singer shivering or appearing cold in some of his final rehearsals
He worked with Jackson beginning in the 1990's and testified that he never saw Jackson drink alcohol or take any medications. Michael also never discussed his medical treatments, Payne said
Payne told the jury he advised MJ he was looking thin.

"Michael said he was 'getting down to my fighting weight', which I took to mean that he was preparing for the performances", Payne testified. "I had no reason to doubt him"

Payne says he was satisfied with the response.
Payne said there was one day (6/19) when MJ was cold. He thought the frustration had him on edge. When Jackson needed to be layered in blankets and required a heater to be comfortable, Payne said, he believed Michael was merely fighting a cold.

"No one else was cold. He had flu-like symptoms"
"Sometimes he was tired and lethargic and had to be, not convinced, but supported throughout rehearsals," Payne recalled

Payne said that in April, May & June, MJ missed 5 rehearsals with the whole group. He said one time Ortega sent Michael home
Bina shows an email from Ortega to Gongaware on Jun 14:

"Were you aware that Michael's doctor didn't permit him to attend rehearsal yesterday? Without invading his privacy, it might be a good idea to talk to his doctor to make sure everything he requires is in place. Who is responsible for Michael getting proper nourishment/vitamins/therapy every day? Personally, I feel he should have a top Nutritionist and Physical Therapist working with him on a regular basis. The demand on this guy is mentally and physically extraordinary! The show requirements exhaust our 20 year olds. Please don't underestimate the need to stay on top of this"

Another part of the same email chain, from Gongaware:

"Frank and I have discussed it already and have requested a face-to-face meeting w/ the doctor... We want to remind him that it's AEG not Michael Jackson who's paying his salary We want him to understand what is expected of him. He has been dodging Frank so far

Payne said his understanding was that AEG was paying Dr. Murray's salary not Michael. The doctor was there to oversee many things, Payne said. Payne explained he didn't have much reason to question Dr. Murray since he thought that a doctor selected to work with Michael was top notch.
Bina asked Payne whether he ever met Conrad Murray. The choreographer says he met Murray twice. Payne says the first time he met Dr. Murray was at the Carolwood house.

"I was going up the steps, Dr. Murray going downstairs, Michael introduced us."

Payne was coming up from the basement to the middle floor. Studio was at the basement. Payne said he never went to the top floor of the house. He says the second time was at the Staples Center, after a rehearsal and Jackson was leaving for the day. Both meetings were brief.
When asked how Michael performed on June 23 & 24:

"He was having his process, I didn't expect him to be like he would in front of a crowd," Payne explained. "He was not at show standards ... I didn't expect him to be as he would be in front of a crowd."
Payne: "It ebbed and flowed. Some days were good, some days were not as good."

The last two days were good.

"I thought he was in his way to the goals he set himself," Payne told the jury.

He didn't have any question that MJ would be able to perform , adding that he and others were impressed while watching Jackson rehearse at Staples Center on June 23/24, 2009.
Payne described the day MJ died: He was headed to rehearsal at Michael's home, got a call from his mother who said she saw reports on the news. Payne heard news on the radio, called Staples Center spoke to Stacy Walker, she said they were rehearsing. He was told to go to Staples.

"We were optimistic of his arrival," Payne said explaining they were expecting Michael to rehearse at the Staples Center.

Payne said Ortega got a series of calls. He remembers Kenny saying:

'tell me something that will make me know it's you and that this is true'

​

" I remember him (Kenny Ortega) collapsing in his seat and crying," Payne testified

Payne said he never saw Michael drink alcohol or take medication but

"Sometimes, in rehearsal, Michael would appear just a little loopy, under the influence of something, but mostly when he would come to the rehearsals from the dermatologist," Payne testified.

That happened two to four times in the weeks before his death, he said. Payne told that he didn't think Jackson had a problem with prescription drugs

"Michael was undergoing personal cosmetic procedures, so he could feel great and do a good job," Payne said.

Payne also said he appeared groggy in the morning sometimes, which he attributed to lack of sleep

"Mr. Jackson just explained to me that he had trouble sleeping, that he was tired, and that satisfied me," Payne testified.

He stated that he's not sure how much weight MJ had lost
Payne mentioned one day in particular at a meeting with Andre Crouch and singers, MJ seemed a little out of it
Payne said at one point, he & others tried to bring in a top physical therapist who works with Olympic athletes to help Michael. Jackson didn't work w/physical therapist flown in for him.

"At the last minute we realized that Michael was not going to go through with it. He was just not comfortable with the invasion of personal space."

Bina played a clip of This Is It from Jun 4 showing the green screen and making of "Drill" and Michael talking about the cool moves, dancing. Payne said the idea was to show the rehearsals and how things came together. The footage itself wasn't altered, but there was editing. Payne said they picked the best of the rehearsal to include in the documentary. He wanted to reshoot some scenes but was not allowed. Payne, who was an associate producer on the This Is It documentary, said the footage of Jackson had not been retouched or altered.
Jackson cross
Attorney Brian Panish cross examined Payne. He asked if Michael ever performed the entire show from beginning to end. Payne said "No"

"Was he ready to perform for an audience?", Panish asked.
"I thought he was on his way to the goals he had set for himself," Payne answered. "All I saw was improvement and getting closer to the goals"

Payne's impression was that MJ loved being a father. He said he saw the beauty of their relationships, loyalty to one another.

"When we rehearsed, we had meals together," Payne recalled, talking about Michael and all three children.

Payne thought the relationship between MJ and Prince was awesome, Michael was a proud father, great to see how they interacted. Prince wanted to be a director, Michael would point out things to him during rehearsal should that be his career, Payne remembered.
As to Paris Jackson, Payne said he saw a very protective young lady, smart, astute, with knowledge of the production, very hands on. Paris, who was 11 at the time, was

"a very retentive young lady who was very, very smart, very astute," Payne testified. "She had full knowledge of the day-to-day operations, from the time of lunch and what it was going to be, she was hands on -- far beyond her age," he said. "She had a lot of responsibility, which I think she welcomed"

Payne said she was "the female of the house," and also "a daddy's girl."

"She really loved her father," he said. "At that time, she was coming to find out his global successes and presence, so she would wear her Michael Jackson t-shirt, headband and bag," he said.

It was Paris who would bless the food when they were have lunch with their father at home, he said.

"She was always the most vocal of the three children and was very concerned about many of the details of the house, was the temperature correct, what do you want to eat," Payne testified. "She just handled a lot for her young age"

Blanket, who was 7 when his father died, was the most quiet of the three. He liked to watch his father rehearsing his dances with Payne in the basement studio of their home, Payne said.

"He was quiet, but always right there with his dad," he said.

Michael guided and mentored him. Payne said he would be proud if MJ was his father and agreed the children suffered a tremendous loss. When rehearsing with Jackson at his Holmby Hills residence, Payne said the singer clearly delighted in being a father and shared meals with all three

"I saw the beauty of their relationships. I saw their loyalty to their father, I saw his loyalty to them. Their father enlightened them and taught them", he testified. "I was very proud to see Michael as such a loving father."
Panish: "Was Paris a Daddy's girl?"
Payne: "Yes, I believe so"

His description of the close relationship Paris (15) and Prince (16) had with their father four years ago could foreshadow the significance of the children's testimony later in the trial.
Payne always carries a video camera with him and shot videos of rehearsal. AEG took the footage that Payne shot and never returned to him. Email from Randy to Paul:

"Make sure you take out the shots of Michael in that red jacket... He looks way too thin and skeletal."

Payne said he was not aware of the email. He said Michael looked thin, but not skeletal. He doesn't know if Paul/Randy took any the footage out. The email was not displayed for the jury
As for Michael's relationship with Katherine, Payne said

"there's no secret that he loved his mother very much. It is kind of common knowledge"

​

"Karen Faye is a make up artist. She designed the make up, was always there when Michael was there", Payne testified.

Payne said Faye and MJ had a long term working relationship. They spent a lot of personal time together. Faye was concerned and frustrated with how Michael looked. She went to Payne kind of in an aggressive way. Payne told her to report to Ortega.
Payne said he wanted MJ to have a physical therapist, nutritionist, massage therapist, and have his family around. He said this was a different scenario.

"This was the first time MJ was working with AEG," Payne testified, saying he had always been hired by MJJ production before.

Payne said this was the first time Michael was not the sole producer of the show. Payne started working without a signed contract. He was being paid by AEG. Panish showed Payne's written contract. It is between Payne and AEG, beginning April 1, 2009. The contract said only AEG could cancel it. He testified that there was a delay in his contract with AEG because the salary was not in line with his standard charges, but that things worked out after he had a conversation with Jackson. Payne also said he believed AEG was paying Murray's salary, not Jackson
Payne was hired and paid by AEG. His contract was with AEG.

Panish: "Who could fire you. AEG?"
Payne: "I'm sure"

Things became heated when Panish inquired about a text message Karen Faye sent to Payne that accused him of lying to the media after Michael's death. He said earlier Faye had approached him in an "aggressive" way about her concern for Jackson's health but he told her to take her concerns to Ortega.

"I do not remember receiving a text message from Karen Faye asking why I was lying to the media," Payne explained.
Panish: "Were you upset when MJ died?"
Payne: "Yes"

During cross-examination, Payne was shown several photos of premieres for the This Is It documentary .Panish shows a picture of Payne at the red carpet premiere. He agreed he was happy about the premiere. In one, Ortega & AEG executive Randy Phillips flank Jackson's manager, Frank DiLeo, who has a cigar hanging out of his mouth. All three are grinning. Brian Panish, the attorney for Jackson's family, remarked that everyone looked pretty happy
Payne said he wasn't privy to details of what was expected of Dr. Murray. AEG was producepromoter, but MJ was the star, had to be happy
Panish reminded Payne that he had testified in his deposition that AEG was

"trying to protect its investment"

​

"I don't have a dog in this race so I'm not on either side", an aggravated Payne countered adding that he felt Panish was being aggressive. "I'm just saying I don't want to be painted as somebody who's trying to mask anything".

After several hours of testy exchanges with Panish, his voice quivered and he dabbed his eyes with a tissue.

"I'm just trying to have a conversation with you and tell the truth."

Panish asked Payne if defendants' attorney approached him during lunch to show him some documents. He said yes, he saw parts of his deposition
Under cross examination, Payne acknowledged that some of Jackson's behavior, including grogginess, lethargy, insomnia and occasional paranoia, were possible symptoms of prescription drug abuse. He also said that despite testifying earlier that he worked with Jackson one-on-one five days a week, he couldn't recall how many rehearsals the singer actually attended
Panish after lunch break got Travis Payne to concede Jackson wasn't present for a May 19, 2009 rehearsal. Payne also conceded that Jackson was a no-show for a June 22, 2009 rehearsal. Panish confronted Payne saying that yesterday he said he was with MJ at a dance studio on May 19, that they were up on their feet & danced.

Panish: "Sir, Michael was not with you May 19, 2009, was he?"
Payne: "No"
Panish: "He was at the doctor"
Payne: "If you're saying, I'm not disputing"

Panish said that on May 19, Michael was having a cyst removed at Dr. Klein's office, so he could not have been rehearsing with Payne.
Panish then said on Jun 22 MJ wasn't there either, "was he?"
Payne said he didn't know.
Panish said MJ was at another doctor's office
Payne said he may have made a mistake about Jackson's whereabouts & he didn't know his personal schedule. Travis Payne had testified yesterday that he and Jackson ran through certain songs on May 19th. He said today he was testifying based on the schedule and notes he compiled and that his recollection might be wrong

"We're human, sometimes we make mistakes," Payne explained, saying he's not disputing that Michael was or wasn't there on those dates.

Payne said there was always something for Michael to do.

"He needed to come to rehearsal, it was part of the job"

Payne said Michael had a hard time picking up some of the material. He was having trouble learning dances, Payne says. Email from Ortega to Gongaware:

"He has been slow at grabbing hold of the work"

Jackson was having trouble learning dances, choreographer Travis Payne says

"Prior to June, I noticed Mr. Jackson was thinner than I recognized him," Payne said, noting he never saw sudden weight change in MJ.

Second time Payne saw Dr. Murray was the night before Michael died at Staples Center.

"I wanted Michael to go home and go to sleep" Payne recalls. Payne said something about Murray felt off, Payne said. "He didn't feel like an official doctor"

Payne knew MJ had sleeping problems and that Dr. Murray was treating him for that. Ortega also knew; Payne thought Gongaware was aware too. Payne also said he and Ortega knew that Jackson was having sleep problems. Attorney Brian Panish asks if AEG executives knew. There were several objections, and Payne was only allowed to answer "No" as to whether Paul Gongaware knew about Michael's sleep problems
Panish asked Payne about choosing Jackson's dancers for This Is It. Payne says they were whittled down from 5,000 applicants. Applicants submitted video clips and their submissions were used to cull down potential dancers from there. Payne said they received 5,000 applications for dancers, about 2,500 showed up for the audition.He taught them some dance moves, and the pool was further narrowed down. Michael chose the dancers
Panish then asked Payne whether he knew how many doctors AEG interviewed to work with Jackson on This Is It. "No", Payne says. Payne also says he isn't aware how much interviewing or investigation into Murray that AEG did.(Panish's point appears to be that there was more scrutiny of backup dancers than Conrad Murray)
During preparations for This Is It, Michael at times seemed "under the influence of something" and once couldn't take the stage because he appeared incoherent, Payne testified.
Payne said he was aware that Jackson had problems sleeping and chalked up the singer's sometimes erratic behavior to sleep aids or sedatives from his dermatologist visits.

"You have to understand that one always says hindsight is 20/20. In the moment I had no inkling of what, ultimately, what was revealed until Mr. Jackson's passing", he said

Payne saw Michael tired and fatigued. He agreed that those symptoms could be signs of drug addiction. Payne was aware that MJ was losing weight during rehearsals and he had not seeing him lose weight like that before.

"He was not in great physical shape and was sore,working up his stamina. Lack of sleep and proper nourishment were starting to show", Payne said.

Payne says at one point, he told Kenny Ortega that Jackson appeared "assisted" (meaning that he thought he was on drugs\meds)
Payne said some people were concerned about the goals not being met, including Randy Phillips and Paul Gongaware. Payne learned what Demerol was after MJ died. He also remembers a mention of Demerol in the song "Morphine".
Panish asked if MJ knew the lyrics of his songs.

"I think he did, he knew most of them, but he wanted to have a Teleprompter for safety.He didn't want to make any mistakes, to refresh his memory. Also to use for sequence of songs",Payne said.

Payne agreed that it was very unusual for Michael to have a Teleprompter with the lyrics of his own songs. He never used it before. Payne didn't specify which songs Jackson wanted the teleprompter for
Payne said a body double was requested for Michael. Misha Gabriel was his body double, but shorter than him. Some of the scenes in the documentary are with the body double, Payne testified. Payne remembers at the Culver Studios in Smooth Criminal there was a stunt and Misha was asked to jump through a glass plate
Payne said most the time, MJ was present at rehearsals. "It wasn't a big deal," he expressed
Panish showed an email from the band leader Michael Bearden:

"Michael is not in shape enough yet to sing this stuff live and dance at the same time. He can use the ballads to sing live and get his stamina back up, Once he's healthy enough and has more strength I Have full confidence he can sing the majority of the show live. His voice sounds amazing right now, he needs to build it back up. I still need all big dance numbers to be in the system so we can concentrate on choreography."

Payne was aware that AEG was considering in mid June pulling the plug on the show. He said Michael looked exhausted & paranoid on Jun 19. Jackson's condition and missed rehearsals led to talk within the last 10 days of Jackson's life that AEG Live LLC, which was promoting "This Is It," might cancel the concert series.

"It was 'We've got to get this together or the plug may be pulled,'" Payne says

Payne was working for AEG and said he relayed his concerns about Jackson's possible prescription drug use and that he was exhibiting troubling signs of insomnia, weight loss and paranoia in his final days to tour director Kenny Ortega. Jackson was struggling to get into shape for the shows, and Payne said his voice coach suggested using a voice track for fast-paced songs until the singer's stamina improved.
Payne went to Michael's house on June 20. He was cold and had to light the fireplace and rub his hand and feet to warm himself up
Panish showed a picture of Michael on June 24 rehearsing "Thriller"; Payne said MJ improved but was not at his best yet.

Panish: "Around June 20, was Ortega in the mindset that Michael Jackson was not ready for this?" Payne: "Yes"

Payne said Michael was not ready, it was not the Michael he knew. He died four days later. But he didn't see anything that alarmed him on June 23/24

Panish:" Did you see that Michael was getting pressured to get everything done in the last days?" Payne: "Yes"

Payne said he could sense something was wrong, but didn't know what it was. He said Jackson's performances in the final days of his life were impressive, and it felt

"like we were definitely on an upswing"

​

"I never doubted Michael because he was the architect of this and he wanted to do it, so part of my responsibility was to help him get there", Payne said, his voice racked with emotion.

Panish ended his direct examination of choreographer Travis Payne with three questions.

Panish: "Did you see that Michael Jackson appeared to be pressured to get everything done at the Staples last rehearsals?"
"Yes," Payne said
Panish: "The pressure about the shows started to manifest itself physically in Michael Jackson?"
"Yes," Payne replied.
Panish:" You could sense that something was wrong, you just didn't know what it was?"
Payne responded "Yes."

AEG re-direct
Payne's demeanor changed after Panish finished questioning him. He was holding back tears when the AEG attorney started re-direct examination. For the next several moments, Payne blinked and dabbed both eyes with a tissue. It was the first time he'd gotten emotional on the stand.

Bina in re-direct asked: "Do you think you could get him there?"
Payne: "Absolutely!"

Bina asked Payne again about how many rehearsals Jackson attended. Payne said MJ was present a significant amount of the days he was scheduled to work but he couldn't recall dates, precisely how many that Jackson attended.
As to Gongaware's email regarding what was expected of Dr. Murray, Payne said the inconsistencies with Michael missing rehearsals warrant a talk. Payne said he thought Dr. Murray was there to care for his patient, making sure right nutritionist was there, to get him ready for the show. Payne never discussed with MJ about his doctors or personal affairs. Payne and Faye were professionals with each other, but not friends.

"Production felt he wasn't coming to rehearsals enough, and that was frustrating to some of the staff," Payne testified. "I had a concern we needed to create a show Michael would enjoy doing it," Payne explained

She also showed Payne photos from the This Is It premiere. First photo is of Payne shaking Jermaine Jackson's hand at the movie premiere. Bina also showed another image of smiling Jermaine, Tito, Jackie and Marlon with Payne at the premiere. Payne cried saying he had been through so much and the rough part was behind them. He was pleased to show the fans what the show was to be.
Jackson re-cross
In re-cross, Panish notes that none of Michael's brothers are part of this lawsuit.
Panish then asked Payne whether Katherine Jackson and Michael's kids went to the premiere. Panish says Katherine Jackson & her grandchildren didn't go to the premiere because they weren't over Jackson's death. Payne said he didn't think anyone was over Jackson's death when the film premiered in late 2009.
Court Transcript

Hello Reddit community,
I'm reaching out for some advice regarding my mom's health issues after her recent visit to Indonesia. She's 68 years old and during her four-month stay, she experienced two significant family events, both funerals, which understandably took a toll on her mentally. Adding to the pressure, she's the sole family member who resides in Europe, carrying the weight of providing for her family.
Her upbringing was challenging, and the recent events have seemingly pushed her to her limits. However, her symptoms seem odd for a typical burnout scenario. Additionally, she was bitten by a dog in Indonesia, leading to anxiety and necessitating rabies vaccinations, which she completed upon her return to Europe. The good news is that her doctors have ruled out rabies.
Symptoms:

• After the first funeral ceremonie, she got really really sick. Lot's of (green) mucus, cough, very very tired, anxiety. this lasted for 7 days.
• After the second funeral, again she got very ill. These funerals were spaced apart. Again, lots of mucus, coughs, green mucus, exhaustion.
• Throughout the months, sometimes diarrhea, sometimes complete constipation.
• Panic attacks & Anxiety she never in her life had these before. She became extremely scared of simple tasks, like making small decisions, she couldn't fly back alone from Indonesia, so I had to come get her.
• Rapid weight loss, despite normal eating habits. She's lost 15kg (33lbs) since the second ceremony and continues to lose weight rapidly. She's now worryingly thin, skin and bones. She also has reduced sensitivity in her skin.

Ever since her return back home, she has insomnia and "pressure" in her head. She overthinks about absolutely everything. She'll sleep for 2-3 hours per night, the docter has put her on sleeping pills and antidepressant. She takes Oxazepam during the day, (2) Mirtazapine tablets for anti depressants and (2) Zolpidem to sleep. However the medications are not helping, she still does not sleep for more than 3 hours per night and during the day she's very "off it" because of these pills.
Despite numerous blood tests showing normal results, except for pre-existing high blood pressure and cholesterol (she takes pills for this), her symptoms persist. Tomorrow, she's scheduled for lung and stomach scans, and today, she underwent more bloodwork. However, her condition seems to worsen with no clear diagnosis in sight.
Considering the vast difference in hygiene and environment between Indonesia and Europe, could it be a parasitic infection? We're at a loss, and her doctor is equally puzzled.
Any insights or suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Thank you for your time and support.

Oh, the tale of the loyal hound, With ears that flap and ears that sound, A quest begins for you today, To cure the pain and keep it at bay.

Key Takeaways 📝

1. What are the common symptoms of ear infections in dogs?
   • Answer: Scratching, head shaking, redness, odor, discharge.
2. How can I safely clean my dog's ears?
   • Answer: Use vet-approved solutions, avoid cotton swabs.
3. What home remedies can help?
   • Answer: Apple cider vinegar, coconut oil, tea tree oil (diluted).
4. When should I consult a vet?
   • Answer: Persistent symptoms, severe pain, or chronic issues.

Understanding the Symptoms 🌡️

When your pup is scratching, shaking their head, Their ear a shade of painful red, A smell that tells of woes inside, An infection they can no longer hide.

Symptom	Description
Scratching	Persistent pawing at the ear
Head Shaking	Frequent shaking of the head
Redness	Inflammation in the ear canal
Odor	Unpleasant smell from the ear
Discharge	Fluid or pus coming from the ear

Cleaning the Ears with Care 🧼

To clean those ears, a gentle touch, Vet-approved solutions mean so much. Avoid the swabs, they push too deep, Gently wipe and make the ear canal sweep.

Home Remedies to Try 🌿

Apple cider vinegar, a mix so fine, With water dilute, it's cleansing time. Coconut oil to soothe and heal, Tea tree oil, but dilute with zeal.

Remedy	Preparation
Apple Cider Vinegar	Mix 1 part vinegar to 1 part water
Coconut Oil	Apply small amounts directly
Tea Tree Oil	Dilute with water, apply lightly

Knowing When to Seek Help 🆘

When symptoms linger, or pain's too much, Seek a vet's care, a healing touch. Chronic issues, severe dismay, To the vet, you must make your way.

Sign	Description
Persistent Symptoms	Symptoms lasting more than a week
Severe Pain	Excessive crying or whimpering
Chronic Infections	Recurring ear infections despite treatment

Conclusion

Oh, the journey, it may seem long, But with care and love, you'll be strong. Your pup's ears will heal, pain no more, With a wagging tail, they'll thank you, for sure.
So heed these tips, this guide so true, For healthy ears, and joy anew. Treat with love, treat with care, And your loyal hound, will always be there. 🐾❤️

Insights from Canine Ear Care Experts 🐕👂

What are the underlying causes of ear infections in dogs?

Ear infections in dogs often stem from a variety of underlying causes. These include:

• Allergies: One of the most common triggers, allergies can cause inflammation in the ear canal, leading to infections. Environmental allergens like pollen, dust mites, and mold, as well as food allergies, can be culprits.
• Moisture: Dogs that swim frequently or live in humid environments are more prone to ear infections. Excess moisture in the ear canal creates an ideal breeding ground for bacteria and yeast.
• Ear Mites: Tiny parasites that infest the ear canal, causing intense itching and inflammation. These are more common in puppies and young dogs.
• Foreign Bodies: Grass seeds, dirt, or other small objects can become lodged in the ear, leading to irritation and infection.
• Hormonal Imbalances: Conditions like hypothyroidism can affect the skin and ear canal, increasing the risk of infections.
• Structural Issues: Breeds with floppy ears or narrow ear canals, like Cocker Spaniels and Bulldogs, are more susceptible to ear infections due to poor air circulation.

Can you explain the process of cleaning a dog's ears in detail?

Certainly! Proper ear cleaning is essential to prevent infections and maintain ear health. Here's a detailed guide:

1. Gather Supplies: You'll need a vet-approved ear cleaning solution, cotton balls or gauze, and treats to reward your dog for their patience.
2. Prepare Your Dog: Have your dog sit or lie down in a comfortable position. Use treats to keep them calm and cooperative.
3. Apply the Solution: Hold the ear flap up to expose the ear canal. Pour a small amount of the ear cleaning solution into the ear canal. Be cautious not to insert the bottle tip too deeply.
4. Massage the Ear: Gently massage the base of the ear for about 20-30 seconds. You should hear a squishing sound, indicating that the solution is breaking up debris and wax.
5. Let Them Shake: Allow your dog to shake their head. This helps to dislodge any debris and excess solution.
6. Clean the Outer Ear: Use a cotton ball or gauze to wipe away any debris from the outer part of the ear. Avoid using cotton swabs, as they can push debris further into the ear canal.
7. Repeat if Necessary: If the ear still appears dirty, you can repeat the process. Be gentle and patient to avoid causing any discomfort.

What home remedies are effective for treating dog ear infections?

Home remedies can be useful for mild ear infections or as a preventive measure. Here are some effective options:

• Apple Cider Vinegar Solution: Mix equal parts of apple cider vinegar and water. This solution helps to restore the natural pH balance of the ear and has antimicrobial properties. Apply with a cotton ball to clean the ear.
• Coconut Oil: Known for its soothing and antibacterial properties, coconut oil can be applied to the outer ear and gently massaged in. It helps reduce inflammation and irritation.
• Aloe Vera: Aloe vera gel can be applied to the outer ear to soothe and heal irritated skin. Ensure it is pure aloe vera without additives.
• Tea Tree Oil: Dilute tea tree oil with a carrier oil (like olive oil) before applying. This mixture can help combat fungal infections, but it must be used cautiously to avoid irritation.

When should I consider taking my dog to the vet for an ear infection?

While home treatments can be effective for minor issues, there are times when veterinary intervention is necessary:

• Persistent Symptoms: If symptoms persist for more than a week despite home treatment, it's time to see the vet. This could indicate a more serious infection or underlying condition.
• Severe Pain: If your dog is in significant pain, crying, or showing signs of distress, seek immediate veterinary care.
• Chronic Infections: Recurring ear infections may indicate a deeper issue, such as allergies or a systemic condition, which requires professional diagnosis and treatment.
• Discharge and Odor: If there is a foul-smelling discharge, especially if it's dark or bloody, this could be a sign of a severe infection or foreign body in the ear.
• Behavioral Changes: If your dog becomes lethargic, loses appetite, or exhibits unusual behavior, it could be a sign that the infection is affecting their overall health.

Are there any preventive measures to avoid dog ear infections?

Preventive measures are crucial to keeping your dog's ears healthy and infection-free. Here are some tips:

• Regular Cleaning: Clean your dog's ears regularly using a vet-approved solution to prevent wax and debris buildup.
• Dry Ears Thoroughly: After swimming or bathing, dry your dog's ears thoroughly to prevent moisture from becoming trapped in the ear canal.
• Monitor Allergies: If your dog has allergies, work with your vet to manage them effectively. This may involve dietary changes, medications, or allergy shots.
• Check Ears Frequently: Regularly inspect your dog's ears for signs of redness, swelling, or unusual discharge. Early detection can prevent infections from becoming severe.
• Balanced Diet: Ensure your dog has a balanced diet to support their immune system and overall health, which can reduce the risk of infections.
• Proper Grooming: Keep the hair around your dog's ears trimmed to improve air circulation and reduce the risk of infections.

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2.3.5 Controversial views and perceptions of the clinical picture of MCAS
2.3.5.1 Alternative diagnostic criteria ("Consensus-2")
In 2011, the group of authors led by Gerald Molderings from the Institute for Human Genetics at the University Hospital Bonn and Lawrence Afrin published their own approach to the diagnosis of MCAS (51). In contrast to the diagnostic criteria of Valent et al. (1), the focus here is more on clinical symptoms. In 2016, Afrin et al. published a list of the most common symptoms that could indicate MCAS (52). Furthermore a questionnaire was developed and published on a website (53), after the answers to which the suspected diagnosis of MCAS could be supported or ruled out depending on the scores obtained. In a recently published publication, the working group referred to their diagnostic criteria as "Consensus-2" and compared and discussed them with the criteria of Valent et al. from 2016 (so-called "Consensus-1") (51). An important difference to the criteria Valent et al. 2016, the authors consider the symptoms not only as the main main criterion, but also a much wider range of previously unexplained symptoms (111 unexplained symptoms (111 possible symptoms (44)) as the most important indication of a a mast cell-mediated cause (14 symptoms in Valent et al. (1)). As The diagnosis of MCAS is considered confirmed if the main criterion is present together with a secondary criterion and possible alternative diagnoses have been excluded. The secondary criteria, in turn, are based on observations made at the time of the 500 people with suspected MCAS at the time of the first publication (44). Further differences between the two consensuses can be found in the laboratory parameters to be determined. For example, the researchers from different disciplines, which according to their own statements can draw on a wealth of experience of of over 10,000 MCAS patients (diagnosed according to their own criteria, nota bene), consider CgA to be specific for mast cells in addition to tryptase, among other things (44). The counterargument of the lower specificity compared to serum tryptase is granted a certain validity in the addendum to the "Consensus-2" published in 2020 (44), however the differential diagnoses with elevated CgA values should be easy to rule out and other markers are also never 100% specific. However, another group was already able to show in 2017 that CgA should not be used as a marker for mast cell disease(49). Furthermore the group of authors of the "Consensus-2" counts heparin as an important marker for MCAS, which should be determined after venous congestion using a blood pressure cuff (54). This maneuver was reported to cause irritation of excessively activatable mast cells with release of heparin in the congested area. Interestingly, the following section mentions markers such as IL-6 or tumor necrosis factor (TNF) which, due to their lack of specificity, are not used in diagnostics, but only in the evaluation of a successful therapy. The authors of "Consensus-2" criticize "Consensus-1" for, among other things the lack of definitions for a treatment response, whereby the "Consensus-2 does not provide any concrete proposals for evaluating or monitoring the response to therapy. Another point of criticism is the lack of exclusion of other comorbidities or differential diagnoses, such as CFS, EDS and irritable bowel syndrome, as clinical indications of MCAS. [...] In return, the AAAAI expressly points out that there is no evidence to date of a connection between CFS or EDS and MCAS. Overall, the clinical picture of MCAS is so complex and heterogeneous that a precise definition of a diagnostic algorithm is not possible at the present time. Molderings et al. therefore propose the acceptance of both the "Consensus1" according to Valent et al. and their "Consensus-2" until more precise findings are available through research. The resulting disadvantages, such as the the poorer comparability of patient populations in scientific studies would weigh less heavily than those resulting from the rejection of "Consensus-2" (an underdiagnosis due to criteria that are too restrictive according to the authors). On the other hand, the large number of non-specific complaints that are supposedly associated with MCAS harbors the risk of inflationary diagnosis.
2.3.5.2 Presentation in the lay press
An expansion of the MCAS definition with the use of non-validated clinical and laboratory chemical parameters for diagnosis is frequently found in the lay media, above all on websites, but also in the specialist literature. Increasingly, patients with (suspected) MCAS are organizing themselves with commitment and are increasingly organizing themselves into interest groups such as MCAS Hope e.V., which campaigns for the recognition of MCAS "as an independent disease". In addition They also network those affected and their relatives and carry out public relations work, which aims to make the clinical picture known to a broader public. This expansion of the diagnostic criteria described above increases the risk of a misdiagnosis of MCAS and overlooking the underlying disease, which may be easily treatable. On the other hand, such an erroneous diagnosis can also lead to the use of unnecessary or potentially harmful therapies for MCAS and supposed comorbidities (20). Shortly after publication of the review paper "Doctor, I Think I Am Suffering from MCAS: Differential Diagnosis and Separating Facts from Fiction" by Valent et al. a self claimed affected person started an online petition in which she demands the authors and the publishing Journal of Allergy and Clinical Immunology to remove the article (55). Among other things, they criticize the criterion of the tryptase increase, which is too harsh and would therefore prevent many patients from being diagnosed. The clinic also does not typically manifest as anaphylaxis, contrary to what is described in the paper, since mediator release in anaphylactic degranulation differs from that in piecemeal degranulation. Finally, the author of the petition, who sees herself as a "patient spokesperson", reports on personal experiences of frustration and feelings of frustration and rejection that were conveyed to her by doctors in the course of her medical history. The petition has so far reached just under 3,000 of the targeted 5,000 digital signatures (as of December 2020) and shows in particular how emotional the issue of the topic of MCAS is being observed and discussed not only in professional circles, but also among patients. Apparently, some patients find the diagnosis of MCAS to be the last explanation for their multiple non-specific symptoms and hope for more acceptance in scientific circles.
2.3.5.3 Difficulties in making a diagnosis
In recent years, despite the existence of consensus criteria, a (suspected) diagnosis is often made in practice, even though these criteria are insufficiently fulfilled. In some cases, the MCAS diagnosis is also increasingly used for otherwise inexplicable conditions that cannot otherwise be explained. The evaluation of symptoms without a known direct connection with the release of mast cell mediators, for example from the neurological or psychiatric spectrum, as a manifestation of the disease leads to a further dilution of the MCAS diagnosis (43). In the "Bonn" questionnaire, the vast majority of the items asked are not based on the consensus criteria formulated by Valent et al. for example they see the sonographic evidence of an enlarged liver as an indication of the disease (53). The measurement of a tryptase elevation in acute relapse, as required by the diagnostic criteria is difficult to implement in practice, whether for reasons of time, capacity or billing. Targeted therapy trials with maximum specificity with regard to all possible decisive mediators are not possible without prior measurement of urinary metabolites and, in the absence of criteria or measuring instruments often do not produce satisfactory results (43). Last but not least, the wide range of possible differential diagnoses, such as for example from the endocrinological, neurological, psychiatric or cardiovascular area, further complicates the diagnosis (43).
Translated with deep.l
https://refubium.fu-berlin.de/bitstream/handle/fub188/32749/diss_s.gu.pdf;jsessionid=A575C43E11977D2F576404BF69D6469C?sequence=3

Hi there! I (20F) am absolutely sure I have POTS, but because of appointment scheduling anxiety, I haven't seen a PCP in a few years. I'm trying to work up to it, but I'm noticing spikes in my symptoms and I'm realizing I don't really know how to manage the condition on my own.
I know it would be best to see my PCP, but I don't actually have one right now. I'm not sure if there's a website or document that lists doctors that are knowledgeable about POTS- if there is, please let me know!
Otherwise, I'm uncertain how to take care of myself. I'm a little scared to eat more salt, since I haven't been told explicitly to eat more salt and a few times I've had very high blood pressure because of my... Relatively uncontrolled anxiety. I'm doing better now, but I don't feel comfortable doing that until I've been told by a doctor it's okay.
I've heard about using compression socks? I don't really know where to get good ones! I have a few ace bandages and some compression gloves, but they haven't been working all that well for me.
Besides those, I know to drink water... That's just about it. If you have any tips, please let me know! I've been having the worst symptom spikes lately and it's been a huge source of anxiety- night sweats, dizziness upon sitting, standing, whatever... I'm not really sure how to help myself, so any advice is very appreciated!

If you're seeking effective Best Tinnitus treatment in Hyderabad, look no further. Tinnitus, characterized by ringing, buzzing, or humming sounds in the ears, can significantly impact one's quality of life. Fortunately, Hyderabad offers a range of cutting-edge treatments tailored to manage and alleviate tinnitus symptoms, allowing individuals to regain control over their auditory health and overall well-being.
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This week's book club list is as follows (enjoy reading and comment which your favourite is below):
​

1. "Zero Limits: The Secret Hawaiian System for Wealth, Health, Peace, and More" by Vitale J., Len I.H. - If it seems like you work hard but never get anywhere, maybe the problem is something within you. Maybe the limitations holding you back come from inside you, not from the outside world. Zero Limits presents a proven way to break through those self-imposed limitations to achieve more in life than you ever dreamed.
2. "The Probiotic Solution: Nature's Best-Kept Secret for Radiant Health" by Mark A., Dr Brudnak - In The Probiotic Solution, Dr. Mark Brudnak states a greater truth: "Disease begins from an imbalance in the body." Good health is a dance on the tightrope of balance. Lose your balance for long enough-and you plunge toward crisis-if not death. Find and maintain balance-and you can enjoy the fruits of a happy, healthy life. It's the law of nature.Whatever causes imbalance, causes ill health-be it cancer, heart disease, autism, diabetes or obesity.
3. "The Bible secret of divine health" by Gordon Lindsay - In this book is revealed one of the greatest secrets of practical living found in the Bible. It recognizes Divine healing as God’s promise for the believer but—and this is important—it goes further. Much teaching on Divine healing misses the profound truth that God intends that his children should not be sick at all—that they should prosper and be in health even as their soul prospers.
4. "The Low Carb Myth: Free Yourself from Carb Myths, and Discover the Secret Keys That Really Determine Your Health and Fat Loss Destiny " by Whitten, Ari; Smith, Dr Wade; D, M - Do Carbs Make You Fat, Hungry, and Lazy? Read to find out.
5. "The Secret Language of Your Body: The Essential Guide to Health and Wellness" by Segal, Inna - The Secret Language of your Body is a comprehensive guide to healing. In this long-awaited book, Inna Segal unveils the secrets to understanding the messages of the body and reveals the underlying energetic causes of over 200 symptoms and medical conditions. This powerful handbook explores almost every conceivable part of the human body, delving deeply into the possible reasons for problems in any given area of the body and offering a unique, step-by-step method to assist in returning the body to its natural state of health.
6. "Ikigai Diet: The Secret of Japanese Diet to Health and Longevity" by Sachiaki Takamiya - Are you interested in natural food, organic lifestyle, or macrobiotic diet? If so, this is a book for you. It has the most recent information on traditional Japanese dietary culture. If you want to be healthy, the optimal way is to model the best of the best in the field. Who are the healthiest people on the planet then? Well, Japan is considered to be the country with the longest life expectancy, and it is featured in many books including The Blue Zones and Ikigai.
7. "Dumping Iron: How to Ditch This Secret Killer and Reclaim Your Health" by P. D. Mangan - How to Ditch This Secret Killer and Reclaim Your Health is a game-changer in health and fitness. The accumulation of excess iron in the body, a condition that affects perhaps the majority of adults, leads to much higher risk of heart disease, cancer, diabetes, obesity, brain diseases such as Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s, and shorter lifespan. Dumping Iron shows how to measure your iron levels, what the test numbers mean, and how to go about lowering iron if necessary.
8. "Breathe Smart: The Secret to Happiness, Health and Long Life" by Aaron Hoopes - Learn the secret Yoga and Tai Chi masters have known for centuries and discover one of the most fundamental dimensions of good health: proper breathing. Breathe Smart shows us how, through deep, conscious breathing we can raise the level of oxygen in the body and reap the benefits of increased energy, better health, and a stronger sense of well-being.
9. "Ancient Secret of the Fountain of Youth Cookbook (Simple, Delicious Recipes for Health & Longevity)" by Devanando Otfried Weise - This book is excellent for those who wish to embrace Food Combining i.e. what has become known as the Hay Diet. It is where one avoids mixing starch-based foods and protein-based foods in the same meal.
10. "The Calcium Factor: The Scientific Secret of Health and Youth" by Robert R. Barefoot; Carl J. Reich - Did you know that scientists have found that cancer thrives in an acidic medium, but cannot survive in an alkaline medium? Did you know that with vitamin and mineral supplements, you can lower the acidity of your body fluids and become healthy? Here's a challenge: If the answer to any or all of these questions is "No", then you owe it to yourself to read The Calcium Factor, not only for the sake of your own health, but for the sake of your family and friends.

So, which one are you picking up next or have read? Let us know with a comment and upvote and share this post and our sub bodychemistry to stay tuned for more reading lists every week!
Love, marmalada

Are you pregnant, supporting someone who is pregnant, or planning on getting pregnant in the future? Then welcome to BabyBumps! This is a daily post where you can introduce yourself and share any photos that you want to share. This is the ONLY place where photos are allowed, please do not make a standalone post with your bump or ultrasound.
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Experiencing an itchy roof of the mouth can be both bothersome and concerning, as it may indicate various underlying issues. In this informative article, we'll explore the common causes of an itchy palate and provide practical remedies for finding relief.
Exploring the Causes
Allergic Reaction
An allergic reaction is a common culprit behind an itchy palate. Foods, airborne irritants, or medications can trigger allergies, leading to histamine release and subsequent inflammation and itchiness in the mouth.
Dry Mouth
Insufficient saliva production, known as dry mouth or xerostomia, can result in palate dryness, irritation, and itching. This condition may be caused by medications, medical conditions like Sjogren’s syndrome or diabetes, or dehydration.
Oral Thrush
Oral thrush, a fungal infection caused by Candida overgrowth, can affect the roof of the mouth, resulting in a white coating, itchiness, and discomfort. It's more prevalent in individuals with weakened immune systems or certain medical conditions.
Oral Herpes
Cold sores caused by the herpes simplex virus (HSV-1) can appear on the roof of the mouth, causing pain, burning, and itching. HSV-1 infections can lead to itching in the upper mouth region.
Chemical Irritation
Certain foods, beverages, or oral products containing irritants can irritate the palate tissue, leading to itchiness. Spicy foods, acidic fruits, alcohol-containing mouthwashes, or abrasive toothpaste are common culprits.
Injuries or Trauma
Physical trauma or irritation to the palate, such as biting, burns, or ill-fitting dentures, can also cause itching.
Remedies for Relief
Identify and Avoid Triggers
If allergies are the cause, identifying and avoiding triggering allergens is crucial. Keeping a food diary can help identify patterns and connections between symptoms and consumed foods.
Stay Hydrated
Drinking plenty of water maintains mouth moisture, alleviating dry mouth-related irritation. Using saliva substitutes or sugar-free gum can stimulate saliva production.
Practice Good Oral Hygiene
Regular brushing and flossing promote oral health. Opt for alcohol-free mouthwashes to avoid further drying the mouth.
Use Topical Treatments
Over-the-counter hydrocortisone creams provide temporary relief. Follow product instructions and avoid prolonged use due to potential side effects.
Try Oral Medications
For persistent cases, oral antihistamines or antifungal medications may be prescribed by healthcare providers to address underlying causes.
Consider Dietary Changes
Eliminating potential trigger foods from the diet, such as dairy or nuts, can help if allergies are suspected.
Manage Stress
Stress management techniques like meditation or deep breathing can alleviate stress-related oral health issues.
When to Seek Medical Attention
If symptoms persist for more than 10 – 12 days or are accompanied by severe pain, difficulty swallowing, or breathing difficulties, seeking medical attention is vital.
Conclusion
While an itchy roof of the mouth can be discomforting, understanding its causes and implementing appropriate remedies can provide relief. Maintaining good oral hygiene, identifying triggers, and managing underlying conditions are key steps in addressing this issue. Remember to consult with a healthcare professional if symptoms persist or worsen.

Here. And I’d like to start by noticing that Steve Sailer is obviously Delicious Taco’s dad. Having said this.
Good episode. Lots of engagement which I suppose is a net positive for all involved. Obviously a lot of the injury stems from a distortion. The episode’s content fantasized and in fantasy warped into something constituting a threat (no, an outright assault) to the listener’s person. One can simply listen to the episode and see that some (in fact the bulk) of the negative responses are from people reacting to some spectral absent-presence rather than to what is actually being said over the course of the 2 hour long episode. The voices and the discourse have instead been shaped into sonic receptacle containing the reflection of something wildly ugly. Injuriously ugly.
Past few days have been brutal. Found myself doom-viewing the main sub, should know better at this age. Feels like I’ve been transmogrified into an absurd and wretched thing. Must've transgressed against a gnome or something. Fascinating to think about.
I would like nothing more than to shame you.
Miami Summer is a killer. Urine is blood-orange. And my mother deserves better sons.
Why would A&D do this?
Witnessing the rankest comments. In bygone age I’d found them tolerable. Having imagined them delivered by high society homosexual. A damned dandy; chubby, sinister, and flamboyant. Capri on a stick limply held between index and middle fingers, twirling wrist ash’ing on expensive Persian rug. The blurry ghosts of his mother and the kid brother who drowned in the pond all those years ago glaring at him from far-off corner. Clearing throat he launches into sing-song slander head peeling back cackling at his own wickedness. Vile and venomous but charming. Instead what we get is 30+ year old mentally-ill men. Men whose Twitter activity has atrophied their cock and balls. Genitals withering away like the Worker's State, in its place a gasping cloaca, worry not I can clock em from miles away. The odious cloaca-havers are soon joined by ruined drug-addled children and the other women. They talk about A&D in disgusting ways. This is unfair and nasty. I confess to being angry. Sweating blood-specked kerosene. Let the scent fill up the empty air between us. My wrath singeing those overgrown nose hairs.
Of the two I think Anna is the one that inspires the harshest parasocial spite. So much so that I’d recommend she take some protective measures against evil eye and tongue. Maybe take baths with hyssop herb, rose water perfume, and holy water.
It’s as if Anna Khachiyan is a Giant Floating Vagina with teeth and a noticeable overbite. Viewed from another angle it transforms into a Madonna encircled by cherubim. Perhaps we are cruel to Anna in order to be kind to our mothers.
All very pre-Oedipal.
Had to step back and parse it out. Anna draws a comparison between herself and Sailer while also asking him a great question,
07:12-07:49
Anna: “I started reading it during the pandemic because it was the pandemic. I was pregnant and bored and I really relate to you as a person who everyone thinks is like evil and monstrous on the internet, but is actually like quite agreeable and mild mannered in real life. And I was going to ask you this question last, but I may as well just ask it now. How do you feel about your new found popularity? And especially, how do you feel about the fact that you have been effectively adopted by or identified with the hard right?”
The first part of the above extract, the sympathetic recognition, brings to mind a bit of 20th century Hermetic theory concerning harmful thought-forms. Our unconscious self-destructive impulses animating the fantasy-phantasm of the other. Inhabiting their shape. Gaining a degree of autonomy. This artificial entity is vampiric by default, provoking what the Czech magician Franz Bardon calls a "magical persecutory complex"... He goes into detail about such entities in Step VI of his seminal work, Initiation into Hermetics. Describing different types of artificial elementals and phantasms along with details on how to consciously go about creating and dissipating them. One of those artificial psychic entities, the one that concerns us, he calls the schemata. Bardon details two variants, one connected with paranoid persecutory fantasies and the other with erotic obsession. The first type comes about when someone who is “easily excitable, easily influenced or self-important” (Narcissist?) has a run in with another person who has, to put it mildly, a memorable visage and dark personality. The schemata is born from the phantasm modeled after this demonic-looking disagreeable person. The victim begins to attribute all kinds of minor inconveniences to the influence of the ugly person. Deludes themselves into thinking that the ugly/disagreeable person is a powerful black magician. Everything appears to reinforce their paranoid delusions. The schema grows in power feeding off the anxieties of their creatohost. The person might end up committing suicide. This was the persecutory schemas desire, having achieved its goal Bardon notes, “how great is the shock when such a spirit realizes on the mental plane that he has committed a very successful magical suicide. What a bitter disappointment! The demonic looking person, however, has no idea what happened; he was actually only the means to an end.”
God gave us eyes so that we might notice things.
The way I see it:
Being social animals the subject of our fantasy, of our fixations, is the fantasy of the other. What makes the human Human is not that we desire but rather that we desire the desire of the other. An excess desire. We fantasize about what the other is fantasizing and enjoying. Our fantasy of the fantasy of the other is the outlines a fundamental lack within our person, a negativity. Experienced as a splitting of consciousness. Intuiting this lack, becoming aware of it, and attempting to articulate it, we are self-consciousness. This negativity or void is in psychoanalytic terms, the unconscious. We likewise intuit that there had once been some original state. One without lack and contradiction. A state of fullness, without the division between self and object. A harmonious whole. A pure consciousness or as Freud refers to it in Civilization and its Discontents an oceanic feeling. The Original Desire, one that is authentically my own, which was not the desire of the other but which unites our desires in itself. This desire is the extinction of all desires.
The eye that perceives the lovely is at once the eye that perceives what I lack. Perceiving this lack, which explains my present condition, I covet. This is an evil eye. The lover’s gaze is of the same type as the infirm or pathic gaze. Reminded of Zizek’s formulation of one of Hegel’s insights, “Evil resides in the very gaze which perceives Evil all around itself" itself a variation of Meister Eckhart’s “the eye through which I see God is the same eye through which God sees me.” The recognition of evil, the ability to see and judge evil, stems from our ability to recognize disparity. This disparity is already present within our own person, the split-consciousness. The feeling cognized, the awareness of our condition as beings separated from the whole. The clairvoyance of the tyrant and the philosopher.
Suppose that psychopathology is born from our inability to recognize an image as an image.
I intuit something more in this person, something they’re hiding. It can’t just be envy, no. It has to be because I can feel that this thing they’re hiding is sinister. It can’t just be that I feel animosity towards this person, no. It has to be because this person is evil and not just an isolated evil but rather a symptom of a much larger evil. An evil that is responsible for all the suffering in the World, for why my World isn’t the way it should be. It can’t just be attraction, no. It has to be that I intuit something more in this person, something hidden, that I must destroy in order to go on living.
If vile shit comes to mind (as vile things often do, especially when one is immersed in ambient algorithmically-summoned vileness, namely outrage and atrocity porn) they won't affirm it to themselves or try to justify or rationalize it or present it as a rational political stance. And they don’t abstract this particular form of vileness into the primary lens through which they view and interpret cultural phenomena. Unreflexive racial animosity is ugly and fetid. We’re capable of recognizing it, feeling it, as something pathological. We’re also capable of laughing at it. Laughing at ourselves. Look at what our ladies have to say about Stuart Seldowitz (the dude who went viral harassing a halal street vendor) in I’ll Be Missinger. “He sucks,” “he’s a loser,” “he’s obviously sick,” and that he gives the impression of someone who lives alone, will die alone, and will be found weeks or even months after the fact.
Perhaps Red Scare is special in how it manages to elicit absurd, wildly inappropriate responses from listeners. Vulgar and revelatory was it? Steve Sailer elicits a similar response and has become an expert in turning said absurd reactions to his advantage. Generally the cooler-head in any given exchange. While the other person shouts obscenities at a ghost, smashing fists against the post, looking crazy, like a proper hysteric. Sailer breaks the fourth-wall, making eye-contact with the would-be noticer, with a little shake of the head, a little chuckle, a little shrug… “you’re noticing right? See what I have to put up with? Imagine these people defining my legacy.” Still he seems to take it with the good humor of an uncle who will still call you on your birthday, despite your drunken outburst during holiday get-together he will admit to not having resisted the temptation to provoke you, it use to be fun, recall all the cool bands I introduced you too? We use to be best buds, “do you really think anything I’ve said merits this sort of response? Honestly?”
Has to be a cheap trick. A technique employed by an old trickster in decades long honing of craft. Maybe not. Maybe what we see is precisely what we get. Most of the very upsetting things being jokes sincerely intended to lighten the mood. Steve Sailer doesn’t care about the particular political orientation of his audience. He just cares that he has an audience. Grateful for the fans he has. Nonetheless happy that they’re not seething malcontent racists. Even if one disagrees with the methodology, the heuristic, the conclusions. That’s secondary, perhaps even tertiary to the recognition sought. His craftsmanship as a writer.
Why I loved his conflict with Will Stancil. Stancil inspired a lot of pondering for me. Putting things in place…
01:29:22-01:29:28
Anna: “You come for the race science and stay for the prose-styling and vivid story-telling.”
In trying to survive as a writer exiled from Mainstream Conservative media (ConInc) during the Bush Jr years. In fact, correct me if I’m wrong but the cancelation that actually impacted Steve Sailer, setting him down the path we find him in, was brought about not by blue-haired hall monitor millennial leftists but by his “fellow” Conservatives. I imagine that he just went with whoever was willing to take him adapting to the editorial standards and audience sensibilities of the publications willing to provide him succor. Not charity mind you but an ability to engage in his own little labor of love.
Read some Sailer. Might get into that later. But that’s the initial impression I got from Steve. Would be utterly mortified if memorialized as a Racialist Ideologue rather than as an entertaining and thought-provoking journalist. Think I also benefited from seeing how he’s actually received by people who are navigating through (or in certain cases, are mired in) the marginal “Hard Right”-spaces or the Rightwing Digital Ghetto. End up realizing that he isn’t hateful, that what you see is precisely what you get, that he privileges craft over ideology, that his reception and exile from Neocon dominated media outlets (remember these are the people gushing ecstatic over the US invasion of Iraq, manufacturing consent for our adventures in the Middle East) was exceedingly unfair but that he nonetheless managed to persevere. And that he really never goes beyond Norm McDonald in terms of his sardonic wit or The Boondocks animated series in terms of his criticisms. His normality is a great source of stability and comfort for his readers; “noticing” and speculating about these topics doesn’t necessarily lead to one becoming a seething racist.
Returning for a moment to Will Stancil, this was what he inspired:
As the last man standing I spend countless hours immersed in detailed fantasies about the coming apocalypse and my enemy's bliss. A dumb and wicked happiness proportional to my suffering. Easy to imagine other people happy. Hearts unbroken. Unburdened, hydrated, sexually satisfied, debt-free, lucky, successful in all business endeavors. Brute, jezebel, schemer, parasite, rival, betrayer... the whole lot of them thriving. Frolicking in my mind's eye. When the time comes I won't forget that they were happy while...others...suffered.
Find that trying to void your mind of all thought or sit perfectly still for 10 minutes. End up feeling like something requires much less energy from us than nothing. Causes coalescing. Conspiring, to what ends?
You see. The very same principle appears to be at work here. Same pathological base that undergirds genuine racial or ethnic animosity. Fantasizing about the other’s enjoyment and being unable to distinguish between the persecutory Phantasm and the actual human being whose shape it appropriates.
Had a friend recommend forgetting. Forgetting is a dialectical exercise, first you have to acknowledge the thing living rent free in your head and acknowledge its origins... then you have to take the steps to stop feeding it. Letting the thought-form dissolve. Let it be put to rest. Reminded of the practice Orthodox Christian contemplatives call Nepsis.
Other approaches as well, acknowledging the presence of anima veiled in shadow.
But listen…
The podcasts I consume, are a reflection of me as a person. Being what I associate and consume. What does it say about me in particular? Reveal about me? That they should have Steve Sailer on the pod. Settling down. Perhaps some responses could be understood in this light. That a Sailer episode reflects poorly on the listener. Constituting a great betrayal of the love and energy and time I have dedicated over the years to you.
I’m not a racist.
Show me your likes on Twitter and I’ll tell you who you are. The most punitive and brutal god. The idea of the AI nu-god being this, utilizing that standard, is horrifying. Show me your likes on Twitter and I’ll tell you who you are, everything you are, and whether or not you qualify to live.
Shamed, I quietly remove the upvote I gave to the hysterical person and the downvote I gave to him.
Hysteria like a yawn is an empathic contagion.
Back to Anna it’s not because she’s ugly and it sucks that she might nurse this delusion. I actually think Anna is really pretty. Rather I think it’s because she’s a mom. She registers as a maternal figure. That’s one of the reasons I think people respond to her the way they do. As stated earlier. We are cruel to Anna in order to forgive our moms.
[To be continued: Wherein I say horrible things that should never be said to the people I claim to love. Will also interrogate Sailor Socialism]

Hey Reddit, AITA for abandoning my best friend on her death bed? I need some perspective on a situation that's been eating away at me. Strap in, because it's a wild ride. So, picture this: I'm a 21-year-old female, part of a tight-knit group of friends. One of us, let's call her Lily, was dealing with some health issues. She is the kind of person who falls sick frequently so we were pretty used to it. This one time she calls all of us from her home saying that she’s been diagnosed with ALS. It took a toll on everyone from the group. We all started crying and having mental breakdowns because the thought of losing our best friend was unbearable. She even mentioned that the only cure for it is a surgery which is very rare and has been performed on only 4 people till now and all of them have died. We tried to be there for her, offering support and care as best we could. We started to get more concerned when she mentioned that her chances of survival are only 15%. Everything was going great and suddenly she started showing symptoms which got all of us very worried. As the days passed , the details of her condition kept changing and her behavior became more erratic, doubts started to creep in. the fact that no one in the university ( doctors ) knew about her condition bothered us . She comes from a very loving family hence her family not being concerned about such a big disease bothered us . She was not even going for physical therapy or taking any medication for the upcoming surgery. She had asked us not to tell anyone about her condition but she proceeded to tell the most irrelevant people about her condition as if she was trying to gain sympathy. This is when we decided to take matter in our own hands . We called her mom , we mentioned how we are concerned about her health and want to know what’s exactly the scenario. That’s when we were slapped by the reality as her mom had no clue what ALS is or what surgery she is talking about. Things started to make sense and we decided to confront her . The day of the confrontation didn’t go as planned . She kept on screaming and called her mother a pathological liar. Then came the date of the surgery. We were on summer break at that time but she didn’t miss a chance to send personal messages to everyone saying how much she loves us .But the next day? She's out partying and getting tattoos to cover up the marks. Talk about a plot twist. Feeling blindsided and betrayed, we began to distance ourselves from Lily. It wasn't just about the surgery shenanigans – she'd been spreading rumors and betraying our trust for her own gain. It felt like the friendship we cherished had been built on a foundation of lies. But now, here's where I need your judgment, Reddit. Am I the asshole for pulling away from my best friend in her time of need? I feel like I've been through the emotional wringer, but part of me wonders if I'm being too harsh. So, lay it on me. AITA?

Hi! I'm a male, 46 yo, 1.68 meters tall, 65 kg. In 2000, while preparing for a corneal transplant due to rapidly declining vision acuity caused by keratoconus I was feeling bad (pulsating pain in left arm, headaches, numb small finger on left arm). Going through different doctors, I was diagnosed with diabetes (marked as "probably MODY"), and put on a diet. Each time I ate too much, I started feeling bad again, but my blood sugar remained normal. In 2003 I was hospitalized again in the endocrinology ward, and again discharged on diet with 'diabetes', despite normal sugars; also was sent to geneticists, but they found nothing.
In 2010, while studying at courses (preparation for an institute), I went off the diet and ate more, because I was feeling tired; basically it was not overeating in normal person's terms; my blood sugars were okay. This overeating caused a kind of stressed stuporous state, but I persisted; I started having weird sensations in my left arm again.
After some days I had a "stroke-like episode" with dizziness and a kind of numbness in the left half of the lips, left arm, left foot. I was afraid and went back to my strict diet, took some cardio aspirin, resumed taking an ACE inhibitor, despite normal pressure. This was when I first had an MRI scan of the brain, and it revealed only an unrelated tumor of the trigeminal nerve (1 by 2 cm, invading a bit into the left orbital cavity), described as "probably a schwannoma" - this tumor has not grown a bit ever since, it has the same size on all scans since 2010. Except this tumor, located in the left cavernous sinus, nothing was found.
After this stroke-like episode, I could not properly read texts - upon reading, I was having attacks of dizziness and sudden strong ear blockage, a kind of 'airplane ear', and sensations of heaviness in my left arm. The same happened upon starting each meal. I was afraid of subsequent episodes, so I went on a really strict diet.
I then had myself hospitalized in the same endocrinology ward and asked the docs there to finally discover what this so-called "diabetes" was, with neurological symptoms and with normal blood sugars. They instead decided to put me on insulin therapy, on tiny doses, only 3 units of ultra-fast Apidra insulin per meal, with no long-acting insulin. Their reasoning was that I was having "anorexia nervosa" and that the insulin would "make me eat more". No amount of describing my neurological symptoms would dissuade them.
I signed an informed refusal to start on insulin, and they discharged me with a diagnosis of "diabetes, probably MODY" again. I then nearly starved myself, being afraid of overeating and having a new stroke-like episode. I could not read, so I spent time listening to audiobooks. Then, half-starved, I had myself voluntarily hospitalized there again and consented to start on this microdosing insulin treatment in November 2011.
Surprizingly, on this microdosing insulin regimen my strange left-sided sensations gradually diminished, over the course of the next 6 months, and I could read again without sudden attacks of "airplane ear" and dizziness and feelings of "my left arm is weirdly heavy/stiff all of a sudden". By the end of 2012, I was working as a translator, studying for a university again, jogging and bicycling.
On 20 April 2018 I had an attack of lower back pain after a bicycle ride in the cold; had some etorixocib prescribed for it; the pain went away in mere days, and bouts of severe fatigue set in. After each bicycle ride, however light, I was having 2 to 3 days of not being able to do anything. I could not translate, I was mentally too slow. My total urinary 24h cortisol was constantly at about 150% of the upper range and my blood potassium was slightly elevated. Doctors found nothing, I went to the psychiatry hospital and they found "sub-depression" (their tests showed that I was 1 point short of being in "light depression). We decided to try out escitalopram, and it worked - my cortisol normalized, I could work again.
In November 2020 I started having bouts of heavy feeling in my left flank some 1 hour after each meal, accompanied with extreme fatigue which lasted for many hours, until the food went completely through the GI tract. I could not work again: slow thinking, tiredness. In the summer 2023 I was hospitalized in the gastro ward of the same hospital, but they found nothing.
While in the gastro ward, I was asked to undergo a planned hospitalization for my diabetes, since they noticed that I had no such hospitalization ever since 2011. I said that I would only consent to that if during my stay I would be re-tested for the presence of diabetes, because I was highly suspicious on whether I actually had it. They agreed, and during my stay in the endo ward, I had a glucose tolerance test accompanied with two measurements of C-peptide. This revealed that my pancreas was producing insulin and I had no diabetes.
I still had several days to remain in the endo ward, so the doc and me decided that I would eat a lot of carb-rich food, and track my blood sugars with the Bluetooth sensor they put on my upper arm. I treated myself to cookies and honey and stuff, and my sugars were just fine - but I suddenly had the same neurological feelings that had vanished in 2012 upon starting on the microdose insulin regimen.
So I was discharged from that unit for the fifth time since 2000, only this time with "no diabetes" in my discharge paper instead of "diabetes, probably MODY" -- but I go on injecting micro-doses of insulin before meals, because otherwise the 'airplane ear' and 'heavy left arm' and 'numb left part of lips/external fingers on left foot/hand' reemerge. Stopping insulin increases these sensations, restarting insulin brings them gradually down.
I was sent to the geneticists again, and as a condition for seeing me they had me take another MRI scan. This time, to my amazement, the radiologist's impression contained a mention of a "lesion in the right part of the corpora quadrigemina area, probably an area of gliosis". The geneticists did some dry blood spot testing and found nothing.
I went to my neurosurgeon and asked what this lesion in the tectum (corpora quadrigemina) could be. She took all the MRI scans dating back to 2015 which I had with me, and after perusing them for a long time said that the same spot is visible on all previous scans; and that she has no idea what it is, but the spot is of the same size, so she indends to pursue watchful waiting, with follow-up MRI scans every 2 years.
I went home and managed to find the rest of the MRI scans dating back to February 2010, shortly after my "stroke-like episode". I can see the lesion there.
I have these questions: 1) Why would radiologists not mention a midbrain lesion in their impression papers for years? Is it clinically insignificant? 2) Could a lesion there be somehow related to my odd sensations? 3) What could have caused the lesion to arise there in the first place, while I was only 32 years old, or even 22 years old (if it arose there in 2000)? 4) Why insulin treatment diminishes these sensations, while going off insulin and eating a lot of carbs makes them worse?
What can I do to research my condition further? I have little confidence in local doctors in Russia, having been treated for a non-existent diabetes for 23 years. Recently I had some stress at work (my attention is flagging, so I had to go from being a translator to being a food delivery person), and my left arm is feeling heavy sometimes, despite the insulin, and I have weird sensations of being a little clumsy, despite not being clumsy in reality.
I'm ready to provide additional information. I'm currently taking 150 mg venlafaxine, 75 mcg thyroxine, 5 mg rosuvastatin, and 1600 to 2000 mcg methylfolate daily. I visit a psychiatrist for a follow up and to renew drug prescriptions. I'm trying to save for a psychotherapist, but my salary is peanuts, so I haven't been able thus far.
I have MRI scans from 2010, 2012, 2013, 2015, 2016, 2018, 2022 and 2024 - the lesion is visible on each of them, but is described only on the radiologist's impression from the spring of 2024. I can upload the scans somewhere if necessary. The lesion is described as "a T2-enhancing area, 6 by 6 by 8 mm in size, with no mass effect".

I visited my urologist 2 weeks ago with these complaints which already lasted almost 1 month: 1. Dysuria (pain after peeing which can be felt inside the urethra especially towards the end of shaft); 2. Meatal pruritus (itching feeling inside)
During the visit he only did a quick check on my shaft and wrote me a prescription for Alfuzosin as a scan at GP showed a stone near prostate and when i asked if this could be contributing towards the pain, he only replied "difficult to say". I was also on my 2nd day Doxy from the earlier GP and uro asked me to complete the antibiotic. He also asked me to take a PSA test since i am concerned.
Fast forward a week now, the earlier 2 issues are almost nonexistent (touchwood) but i have new symptoms like lower right abdominal tenderness, dull lower backache, dull right butt/pelvic ache which i notice more when i sit.i also noticed im recently having night sweats (not drenched but from neck) and alarm bells start ringing.
Im now waiting for the psa results and the level of anxiety is off the roof. Eversince this started i havent been having proper sleep/rest due to anxiety. Thanks for reading, please let me know if this sounds like prostatitis/CPPS.