Growing up I don't really have friends and it put into this pedestal thinking that I must be really pathetic, no one even tried to get to know me, they tend to act that I don't exist and it only got worse throughout my teenage years. Wherein I don't even know how to interact with people anymore when I do I stutter alot and kind of lost my voice along the way. Now I suffer from social anxiety which make it even worse it's probably because of all the bullying that happened to me when I was kid that's why whenever my anxiety were at it's peaks I tend to get depressed and Isolate myself from everyone. It's exhausting having to show myself out there when deep inside I just want to end it all and then it happens. My anxiety started to manifest itself affecting my grades, my mental healh and family. I feel so lost and alone in that moment like there's no way out and the only solution that I came up with was suicide which was a very impulsive decision, I went for it and decided to just leave all this shit behind me cause I'm just so fucking exhausted existing having to suffer every seconds of my life. I overdosed but survived it somehow and went to school the next day and acted as if nothing happened it was actually the end of school year when I did it (this was last year). That's why I decided to dropout of school this school year cause I still haven't find a way to deal with the fact that I tried to killed myself last year , and I have been isolating myself since then, I can't even get out the house. I'm literally in my room rotting like a self deprecating trash.
'Sorry for my bad english.'.......

If your from an AFWM community. (Asian female. White male.) Due to the amount of people asking to chat. This will be here for those who are curious if they can chat.
Can I DM you? - Yes. You may DM me.
What if I'm a trans or 'Sissy'? - I'm into biological women. And real feminine girls. But because of us just behind screens. I do not mind. Humiliating, degrading or being a "bully" to you or being praised by you. It's fun for all of us at the end of the day.
I'm a cuck/beta, is that ok? - Yes. I have no issue talking to you.
And note: This is all consensual and for fun. I'm a nice guy irl. Lol. As fun as it is for us, reminder I do have a life. I do have an actual Asian girlfriend. And If I'm not active or responding, it's not because I want to ghost you. I am just busy. Apologies. I do respond fairly often though.
I hope these answers some of your thoughts or questions! 🤝🏻

when i was in like 7th grade and like 12 years old (im 16 now by the way) i dated this girl on and off
and when i say on and off i mean like 5 times in the span of 2 years (2020-2022) in which they broke up with me and then asked me out again 5 times
back then i was stupid and i went back every time bc i thought we were in love
i wont go into detail about the relationship because 1) i have zero care for how i was treated back then anymore, im over it 2) it was a lot and id be here forever even if i did want to talk about it
but to sum it up all of my friends absolutely hated this person and were mad i was dating them and were over the moon when we broke up for good
after a couple months after our last breakup we did what has always happened after we broke up and we formed a friendship again, i went shopping with them and got food with them, car rides with them etc
in 2023 i started dating the most amazing man i could have ever asked for, he has truly been a blessing in my life and has really changed my life for the better, and to top it all off he has really shown me how a healthy relationship should be. He has shown me so much kindness and has gone above and beyond for me and i'm so appreciative of him and all his kindness, he has taught me real love
when me and him started dating i stopped being around this ex

1. because now that i was dating my amazing boyfriend i realized i used to hang around them in some hope they'd show me that temporary love again (i was very blind and easily controlled 👎)
   
2. because now that i had realized this and was finally aware of how awful the situation had been and was now completely over them i realized they have always made me somewhat uncomfortable
   

and 3. who the hell wants to be around there toxic ex?? especially when i'm now in a serious relationship? being around an ex you were long term with is just lowkey weird, if my bf was friends with an ex he was long term with, even if completely over them, i'd be lying if i said it wouldn't weird me out and make me uncomfortable, i respect my partner and he respects me
anyways, my ex hadn't tried to reach out to me since and they honestly haven't crossed my mind in half a year i thought (and hoped) that was the end of the story
TILL RECENTLY my friend group from one of my school activities is also somewhat friends with my ex, and this has never bugged me, but apparently it has bugged my ex strongly.
because half a year later since i stopped talking to this ex apparently they have started complaining to my friend in this shared group about how they • feel excluded when im around • feel i've been ignoring them • and how they believe this is all my boyfriends fault, and that my boyfriend is "controlling" who i talk to
its escalated because they brought it up to my friend again and said they were going to "confront" me about it?????
this kinda happened a couple months ago when they asked this friend if i dating my current boyfriend and trying to get info, but my friend said they should stop being weird.
Now they are back at it worse than before??
why can't they just let me go and leave me alone?
to be perfectly clear my boyfriend is the furthest thing from controlling, and im very offended that my ex is 1) trying to bad mouth him and 2) painting him as controlling and assuming im only destined for toxic manipulative controlling relationships like the one i was in with them
i know im better than that now and i think its wild they believe there has to be some outside force keeping me from talking to them
the reality is it was completely my own decision to stop talk talking to them, and i've been very happy with my decision
my boyfriend doesn't know about the current situation i haven't told him because hearing that someone is painting him to be controlling would break his heart, he is so kind and it's made me absolutely livid that my ex is so immature they have to shit talk my boyfriend to feel better about themselves
but should i tell him? and besides telling him, what do i do about the situation??
do i confront my ex and tell them to get a grip and stop being an obsessive creep? or is that what they want and should i just not ingage in the situation at all
PLEASE help me 🙏🙏☹️

when i was in like 7th grade and like 12 years old (im 16 now by the way) i dated this girl on and off
and when i say on and off i mean like 5 times in the span of 2 years (2020-2022) in which they broke up with me and then asked me out again 5 times
back then i was stupid and i went back every time bc i thought we were in love
i wont go into detail about the relationship because 1) i have zero care for how i was treated back then anymore, im over it 2) it was a lot and id be here forever even if i did want to talk about it
but to sum it up all of my friends absolutely hated this person and were mad i was dating them and were over the moon when we broke up for good
after a couple months after our last breakup we did what has always happened and we formed a friendship again, i went shopping with them and got food with them, car rides with them etc
in 2023 i started dating the most amazing man i could have ever asked for, he has truly been a blessing in my life and has really changed my life for the better, and to top it all off he has really shown me how a healthy relationship should be. He has shown me so much kindness and has gone above and beyond for me and i'm so appreciative of him and all his kindness
when me and him started dating i stopped being around this ex

1. because now that i was dating my amazing boyfriend i realized i used to hang around them in some hope they'd show me that temporary love again (i was very blind and manipulated 👎)
   
2. because now that i had realized this and was finally aware of how awful the situation had been and was now completely over them i realized they have always made me somewhat uncomfortable
   

and 3. who the hell wants to be around there toxic ex?? especially when i’m now in a serious relationship? being around an ex you were long term with is just lowkey weird, if my bf was friends with an ex he was long term with, even if completely over them, i’d be lying if i said it wouldn’t weird me out and make me uncomfortable
anyways, my ex hadn't tried to reach out to me since and they honestly haven't crossed my mind in half a year i thought (and hoped) that was the end of the story
TILL RECENTLY my friend group from one of my school activities is also somewhat friends with my ex, and this has never bugged me, but apparently it has bugged my ex strongly.
because half a year later since i stopped talking to this ex apparently they have started complaining to my friend in this shared group about how they • feel excluded when im around • feel i've been ignoring them • and how they believe this is all my boyfriends fault, and that my boyfriend is "controlling" who i talk to
it escalated because they brought it up to my friend again and said they were going to "confront" me about it?????
this kinda happened a couple months ago when they asked this friend if i dating my boyfriend and trying to get info, but my friend said they should stop being weird. Now they are back at it worse than before??
why can't they just let me go and leave me alone
to be perfectly clear my boyfriend is the furthest thing from controlling, and im very offended that my ex is 1) trying to bad mouth him and 2) painting him as controlling and assuming im only destined for toxic manipulative controlling relationships like the one i was in with them
i know im better than that now and i think its wild they believe there has to be some outside force keeping me from talking to them
the reality is it was completely my own decision to stop talk talking to them, and i’ve been very happy with my decision
my boyfriend doesn’t know about the current situation
i haven’t told him because hearing that someone is painting him to be controlling would break his heart, he is so kind and it’s made me absolutely livid that my ex is so immature they have to shit talk my boyfriend to feel better about themselves
but should i tell him? and besides telling him, what do i do about the situation??
do i confront my ex and tell them to get a grip and stop being an obsessive creep? or is that what they want and should i just not ingage in the situation
PLEASE help me 🙏🙏

Species: Dog, mixed breed rescue
Age: 11 years old
Sex: Female, Spayed (she was spayed later in life than is recommended)
Weight: 40 lbs, very lean and has never been overweight
Relevant History: She has a history of both benign and malignant lumps including benign skin tags (4 years ago), benign mammary duct ectasia (4 years ago), malignant mammary tumor that was low grade/very small and caught early removed 2 years ago, had chest x-rays every 6 months since and all have been clear of indications of metastasis or reoccurance. The type of cancer this tumor was is considered a low to medium risk of metastasis or recurrence.
Current Presentation: About 5 weeks ago I noticed during a regular inspection for lumps and bumps that my dog was developing a skin infection near her rear most mammary region. She did have a run in with some fire ants so I assumed it had been an ant bite that got infected. When I brought her to the vet, the vet noted what felt like a tumor directly below the infection. It was hard to feel/palpate when the dog was in most positions, but she was able to feel it was there. The recommendation was to treat the skin infection and then, once clear of infection, proceed with lumpectomy and biopsy. She completed a 14 day course of cefpodoxime oral antibiotics but the infection did not improve. She was given a second course of the same but after 5 days it was getting worse rather than better. The vet prescribed oral clindamycin instead to see if that would clear it. She did a full course of that and when it was clear the infection was persisting we were advised to consider moving forward with the lumpectomy in case the tumoassociated hormone impact/immune impact may have been causing the infection resistance to improvement.
She had surgery on May 8th to remove the lump and some of the infection damaged tissue. Since then, her incision has stayed looking good (no swelling, no unusual colored discharge, appears to be closing up nicely) but as of yesterday, she developed an odor that I can only describe as smelling like infection. I might be wrong as I am not sure what a normal odor from a surgical site might be, but from an instinct level, it just seems off to me. She is still on clindamycin and the skin itself does not appear infected despite the odor. She does not have a fever or any other infection symptoms.
Her energy level is good and normal (she's still a highly active dog/more active than most young dogs we know), has a good appetite, and healthy bowel movements. She has no other health issues besides this. We have been keeping her confined other than potty breaks so she does not run and jump and ruin her stitches.
With all this context, yesterday we received the histopathology report from her lumpectomy. It does not sound good at all. The vet has offered a referral to an oncologist.
Clinical Report: I don't know how to attach the histopathology report directly, so I am copy/pasting the relevant sections below.
Description Haired skin, masss left caudal mammary chain: Elevating the epidermis and extending from the superficial dermis into the subcutis is a densely cellular, unencapsulated, poorly demarcated, infiltrative neoplasm composed of polygonal cells with distinct cell borders arranged in lobules, islands, nests, loose sheets, and rare tubules on a dense fibrovascular stroma. Neoplastic cells have a moderate amount of eosinophilic cytoplasm and a single round, centrally positioned nucleus with finely stippled chromatin and 1-3 prominent, round, basophilic nucleoli. Anisocytosis and anisokaryosis are moderate. Four mitotic figures are noted in ten high powered fields. Occasionally, neoplastic cells have karyomegaly, are multinucleated, or contain bizarre mitotic figures. Multifocally, throughout the superficial dermis and subcutis there are neoplastic emboli in the lumens of lymphatic vessels. Throughout the mass are small areas of hemorrhage and necrosis. The overlying epidermis is ulcerated and covered by a serocellular crust. Neoplastic cells abut and continue through the medial and caudal surgical margins.
Histopathologic Diagnosis Haired skin, mass left caudal mammary chain: Mammary gland anaplastic carcinoma – grade III (high grade) - incompletely excised - with vascular invasion.
Comments
The left caudal mammary chain mass is consistent with a grade III (high grade) anaplastic mammary gland carcinoma. Neoplastic cells abut and continue through the medial and caudal surgical margins, and surgical removal of this mass is considered incomplete. Many dermal and subcutaneous lymphatic vessels also contained neoplastic emboli, and there is concern for local or distant metastasis of this neoplasm. Full clinical staging of this dog is recommended. Mammary tumors occur commonly in female dogs, particularly in those that are intact or were spayed at an older age, and ~50% are malignant. In intact animals, tumor growth can be hormonally influenced. Mammary gland carcinomas can metastasize, most often to the local lymph nodes followed by distant sites such as the lungs and other viscera. This carcinoma is classified as grade III (high grade) according to the most recently proposed grading system. Grade III mammary gland carcinomas have the highest rates of metastasis, recurrence, and cancer-related death. The histologic pattern of this carcinoma is consistent with an anaplastic carcinoma subtype. Anaplastic carcinomas are the most malignant subtype of mammary gland carcinomas and all are classified as grade III. They have very high rates of metastasis and a reduced median survival time (~3 months). This patient should be examined for evidence of regional and distant metastasis.
My Questions for this community:
1) Based on the grade and type of cancer, what are the chances that an oncologist can help prolong things for a reasonable amount of time? I don't want to put my dog through chemo or procedures/etc if it will only add weeks or months, on the other hand, if it could add years of high quality of life than of course that could be the right choice for her. I want her final chapter to be comfortable, joyful, and peaceful. I do not want to put her through unnecessary stress just for my own sake of having more time. Her best interest is my only basis for decision making.
2) Given the odor but otherwise lack of infection symptoms, how likely is it that the cancer has weakened her immune system so much that she won't recover from the infection?

Well met, friends!

I'm a small fish in a sea of amazing players hoping to find a group of likeminded people to play with! I'm 27F, with about 5 years of TTRPG experience and 10 years roleplay in general. I have reached a point as a player where I don't see TTRPGs as just a casual hobby, but as a special experience that can only be reached though the labour of love, commitment and collective interest of everyone at the table. And I'm hoping for a group that shares in this mindset.

What I can offer:

• Flexibility and commitment: I respect everyone's time and I'm confident that I will not be late to or miss sessions. My availability is mostly in the BST timezone, but I am able and willing to commit to playing late for the right group.
• High dedication and immersion: I am a creative player with a passion for writing. I make in-depth characters with compelling backstories who are well-established in the world they live in. In game, I'm an experienced roleplayer with an immersive and emotionally engaged playstyle, who invests in the DM's world, NPCs and fellow players.
• Proactiveness: I will make a character who has reasons to be involved with the story and world and who never says no to adventure.
• Collaboration: I have a track record of playing support/ supportive characters and I would love a party that is close-knit and can emotionally invest in each other. I am a firm believer in equal sharing of spotlight and I respect/ am supportive when it's someone's turn to take the stage.
• Art: I love TTRPGS and I love drawing pcs/npcs or meaningful/funny scenes from sessions.
• Openness to various systems: I have a preference for fantasy settings and magic to some degree. Depending on the system, I ask for patience from the group while I learn the rules.
• Voice available and video if required. I am willing to learn any (free) VTT.

What I'm looking for:

• Players & DM over 18y/o
• Kindness and Inclusivity: LGBTQ friendly! Racism/ homophobia not tolerated. No antagonism or personal favouritisms by the DM, no outcasting or bullying by the players.
• Active communication: Hoping to play with open and emotionally mature people, who are not afraid to discuss and settle any problems that might occur in and out of game.
• Availability and consistency: A group that looks forward to the game and playing together every week, as opposed to those who only play when they have nothing else better to do. I am hoping for stable schedules, and cancellations rare and notified in advance where possible.
• Group: A smaller number (3-5) of proactive and collaborative people who are comfortable with roleplay and becoming their character. Who are able to immerse themselves in the story and invest in each other.
• A game that is taken seriously: The story itself doesn't have to be serious at all times, but I prefer not to play with joke/meme characters, or those that are only defined by annoying quirks.
• Immersive play: A living, breathing world, and players who can remain in character for the majority of the session.
• Roleplay heavy: A narrative game ran by a DM who encourages player creativity and engagement. A compelling story with intrigue, exploration, interesting foes and meaningful combat, where player agency and choices matter.

At the moment I am not looking for:

• Streamed campaigns/ podcasts, PBP (play by post), West marches, paid games, heavy combat- focused games or magic-less settings
• Groups with 6 or more players
• Well-established groups of long term friends (had to specifically add this due to previous bad experiences)

Thank you for being with me so far! I know I'm asking for a lot, but in return I guarantee you someone who will deeply invest in your world, keep detailed notes, come up with creative solutions, draw cool art, write rhymes and songs, and much more! I will respect your time and hard work, and will try my very best to reward it by being a good player and ensuring that you have as much fun as I am!

If you are a DM who has similar wants and expectations, please send me a message with a little bit about yourself, your campaign /players and availability and we can take it from there!

As we all know, there are many factors that can determine the rise and fall of a memecoin. Here, I'm going to explain to you all the Hege Theorem on why Hege can't fail, won't fail, and will eventually reach well over 100mil. It's written in the stars and if you're a community member you probably know already, but I'll split this post into different factors to show you why Hege is the most solid project all-around, and why you should consider buying it and holding it for a couple months at least.
This post aint AI stuff, so don't expect me to say that "our vibrant community fosters a crispy and original project revolutionizing the blockchain". No bullshit, just straight facts.
Hege Factor 1: Dev and Team. Hege Dev has shown again and again that he is trustworthy and dedicated to the project. He has been in the chat every day, communicating every new development and marketing move with the community with maximum transparency. And he obviously hasn't sold a penny. There's also rumors that he'll be quitting his graphic designer job when we reach 10mil MC and go full-on working on Hege. The team supporting our Dev is also composed by chads who recognize the long-term legitimate nature of the project and want to see it thrive. A lot of big holders are in the team too, so many top holders wallets are doxxed and support the chart. Our top holders and loyal whales often also do matching buys, help the chart boom during pumps, and give the community daily TAs on the state of the chart and what to expect from it. Our liquidity to MC ratio is excellent and extremely attractive for whales, memecoins with double our MC have less than our liquidity.
Hege Factor 2: Organic+Paid Marketing blending strategy.
Hege is an extremely promising, yet still very young memecoin. We are only 4 weeks old. For our first 2-3 weeks we relied almost exclusively on organic growth, which brought us from 1.5 to 8 millions just by the sheer power of our narrative and viral graphics. Now, we are taking a blended approach and spending our growing marketing funds to encourage the community. We have already had three big calls just this week. Two were from Chinese influencers, as the asian market access will get us a lot of new buyers and attention. Both influencers have 120k+ following on X, and we expect more whales and big buys in the next days as general market volume recovers. We also were called from the Whale Everything X account (140k+ followers), and a lot more marketing is on the way. We have a CEX listing wallet to gather more funds to be listed in CEXs and a separate marketing wallet where the community and top holders put quite a lot into regularly. It's actually amazing how much (and how many) people believe in this project. Most importantly, we have a newly launched online merch shop which just like everything Hege is extremely cool. Multiple Hege accessories and clothes, and all profits go directly into the marketing wallet. There's also plans to film a video of someone dancing in the club in full HEGE outfit (chad Dev offered 500€ out of his own pocket to whoever would do it)... And it's gonna be a banger.
Hege Factor 3: The community.
Hege's community is unlike any other for a couple of reasons. We are very active in the TG chat, have more groups for different nationalities, from spanish to chinese and Dutch. We have a special Hege After Dark chat for everything...freaky being discussed in the night time. Everyone has a ton of fun and makes new friends in the Hege Fam. The vibe is extremely wholesome and immaculate, so just come vibe with us. You won't regret it. Community and Dev/team also have a ton of trust in each other and believe in this project like no other. We have our own subreddit, X account, crazy cool website, TG community and Discord chat. $HEGE is a movement and it cannot be stopped.
Hege Factor 4: Insane graphic potential.
Something that is not discussed nearly enough about Hege is the crazy quality of our memes, graphics and content. Our Dev is a graphic designer and it shows. Hege has its own recognizable palette with bright, simple colours that are easily memorized and recognizable. New Hege memes come out on a weekly basis. We have just released the first Hege short, and quality is only going up from here. Our merch is therefore also extremely cool, and I think it looks insane even without considering the project behind it. Some of the accessories and clothes are something I'd consider buying if i saw them in an actual shop. And remember all the profits from it actually go into hege's marketing wallet!!
Hege Factor 5: Listings
We have been listed on CMC just last week, and we are now planning to get listed on CEXs to boost our presence and volume, and break through tens of millions of MC. We have some hung members of the team already contributing a lot of Sol to allow us to get listed. But we know we are getting there, sooner or later, cause Hege is a memecoin with a dream, and his dream is to smash. No way we're letting our boy remain a virgin. Which brings us to the key to understanding our project
The ultimate Hege Factor: The Hege Narrative™
All wars and great things on this earth were originally caused by someone wanting to smash. Think Troy. We will destroy civilizations for pus*y.
Well, we are here to make Hege smash his dream girl, Hegena. Hege is a redemption story at heart: he is a little fat, his parents became roadkill when he was just a baby, and he's now going through high school being bullied by the chad hedgehog Hendrix. Hendrix also stole Hegena for himself. The only way for Hege to finally get to smash Hegena is to become a successful memecoin. By making Hege rich, we're unlocking new viral chapters of his story. At 10mil MC, chapter 3 will be uncovered. Help us get Hege to smash and take his dream girl back from his bully!!!
Right now, you could be convinced about the solidity and strenghts of the project. You could be thinking...
"WHY SHOULD I BUY NOW THO?"
Well, the answer is simple: we are on a dip. After a low volume slow weekend (as most weekends are) we are currently hovering around the 3-4 mil area. Last time we had this kind of consolidation (actually lower, going to 2.5mil) , we pumped to 8.4 mil in just two days right after. These last couple days, a lot of volume and interest has been sucked into GME hypecoins, but that will soon be over. Once people realize their profits, they will put it back into the coins they trust and can sleep on, and Hege is the perfect example of that. Don't miss our next pump over 10 mil, it's getting closer: join the Hege Fam now and be a happy man in a couple of weeks.
Check out our socials, shops and website. You'll easily understand why this project's originality is so attractive, and you'll see what the hype is all about. We're just getting started.
WE'RE GETTING HEGE LAID.
CA: ULwSJmmpxmnRfpu6BjnK6rprKXqD5jXUmPpS1FxHXFy
🦔Hege Links🦔
Website: Hegecoin.com
X: https://twitter.com/HegeCoin

i emailed this to agencies that deal with hunting and wildlife problems
pasts@varam.gov.lv
info@wildlifesos.org
reportmisconduct@undp.org
there is no obvious place to report this and expect a serious hearing from someone fluent in English and scientifically minded
the following is what I wrote a month ago after the event
i can't judge after hand how much danger i was in but i would treat it seriously
luckily has not happened again in this country for a month. hopefully never happens again. although the next time i will have the benefit of having experienced it already
when police arrived i demanded prison for the dog owner in clearest possible way i could. after my speach was done they did not ask me a single word. they could tell i was furious of fear. and better to talk another time. i am so drained from global security work that i can't follow up on this but this should be available for anyone to read that might experience it themselves or take upon their self to wander around this globe as i do
i will probably feel guilty if the owner lose his dogs or hunting permit or reputation in his community. i am not going to judge anyone extremely harshly
if they ask me to fill out a criminal report according to some kind of format standards i am not going to do it myself an experienced prosecutor that has done it before is free to report this or pass it along. just not going to fill in report fields in some kind of form. you do it for me if you want to. i am not doing it. should be enough information to find
http://geohash.org/u6p4gj36
is the exact location and anyone can guess where the dogs came from probably the nearest mansion two thousand metres away to the east across p111 near upsede. upsede mansion. good luck asking them about it they don't speak a word of English here development is seventy years behind the west

preface

this is so incredulous that it could be picked up by news
still in shock six hours later at dawn
just the title should give you the general idea
i have never heard of such outrageous neglect in dog keeping in my life
the dogs escape unnoticed at night and hunt without human supervision and presumably return in the morning without anyone doing anything about it
this dog owner would make the top ten list anywhere in history
the dogs occasional howl brought up pictures of wolf movies the grey with that guy from Schindler's list the guy that played Oscar Schindler fighting with wolves with broken glass and a big knife to his death but i can safely discard all theories besides a runaway hunting dog militia on four legs in a large pack sounded like at least ten animals
in that immense fear of a completely unfamiliar situation in a life of hiking around the globe thoughts whirled around all possible night mares before i realised it is obviously hunting dogs all else is pure fantasy wolves are absolutely ruled out
they did not retreat when they sensed my presence but stayed in full alarm perhaps as when they encounter prey on a supervised hunt to alert the humans. even though they knew they were alone and no one to alert, they knew i was probably not prey, did not know enough to EVER be alone unsupervised anywhere but home preferably inside, but did NOT know or predict the length of the prison sentence they just brought on their owner by this nightly escapade. whoops
the locals will predictably put the lid on but the power of the internet is a wonderful thing
i can not imagine any circumstance that would make this less than prison anywhere in the union or West europe. now this is the old east. no one understands English etc. one escaped dog barking in the forest. fine. slap on the wrist. possibly losing care of the animal...ten rabid hunting dogs in full alarm scaring the life out of a hiker resting at night. shake those bars for three months. watch that prison television. and there won't be any Marlborough or beers in prison

the entire report

the exact location is near the highest hunting tower on the old railway trail passing by upsede north east of liepaja that is used for hunting commonly judging by all the towers lining the road there
This began around Four hours after dark on the early night of Sunday 28 April 2024 or exactly 1:00 o'clock
I will first describe exactly what happened and after that separately my interpretation in hindsight when recalling these events three hours later when I can calm down
This is a rather long story so I will get to my point right here before the story
What can I do if I encounter a dog pack like this again except tell at them and calmly leave. What if they hunt me or behave like they are guarding a territory. However remotely that might seems. There is a reason this is a serious crime. Too much uncertainty
Can you confirm that this kind of incessant barking is absolutely impossible in any other animal
In no circumstance whatsoever would any wolf pack or any deer flock behave like this even if I stood right on their den with ten kids inside
The occasional howling is something that dogs still retain from their wolf origin not long ago
It is not unlikely that a pack of hunting dogs alone would howl occasionally
Despite yelling at them several times there was no yell back from a human. Very likely the dogs escape at night without anyone caring about it extremely dangerous and frightening to a hiker that need. Rest at night not the fright of a life time
I could not imagine that in a relatively rich country anyone ever would drive their dogs for a night hunt. Would be absolute insanity. Neglect and alcoholism depression (försupen dumhet Swedish) I can easily imagine. Not outright insanity. Even if night hunting permits are sometimes issued in Germany for "animal control" "population control" of wild pigs. This is a completely separate topic that I will not say more about than that I am working on these issues on and off. My view as a progressive world ambassador could not be further from the idea of shooting at anything anywhere for any reason. Except tranquilizer darts for humane population control of CAPTURED animals not hunted. Captured. It is clear in Sweden that shooting anything anywhere with fire arms does not belong in the future society. Now this is all I will say about this. We are working on this as fast as is possible. The education effort still left on this planet is still enormous and daunting
Regarding dog behaviour in detail I know very little despite inspecting a manuscript by the foremost scientist on the subject that work in Budapest that is most famous for working on the Philippine paradise fish ten years ago before they changed to dogs and removed their aquarium
Dogs in particular have very little room in the professional literature since most pros are not anthropo centric. All mammals share common traits like an early recognition of friend and foe. Dogs in particular has almost never been studied at least not dogs for guarding or hunting. There might be one single work perhaps by one single biologist or behaviour ist ethology biology for shepherds dogs that life with grazing livestock
All books cover territory selection and protection and pack hunting or other flock behaviour. But almost nothing has apparently been possible or interesting to anyone to publish as a professional seeking a career in science in ethology animal behaviour or population biology. so i am not the only one drawing a blank when trying to explain the behaviour with any satisfaction more than anecdotal that is hard to call science

what I experienced

A sudden bark that I expect to be a roe deer that bark and run away. happens all the time
Although the bark was not quite right. more like a dog which I have never encountered at night
Suddenly a roaring festival of barking and occasional howling
The distance is extremely uncertain but perhaps five hundred meters
The direction was towards road p111 to the east toeards Upsede. i am by the big tower. There is one house near the road that the dogs could belong to if they crossed p111
Now my primal instinct set in and I envision a pack, a large pack, of wolves near their den the core of their territory. Frothing over my intrusion and ready to approach in full alarm
In hindsight this is just the occasional howling that caused this and everything about this speaks against wolves
IF wolves can behave like this or has been observed or heard doing this in ANY circumstance whatsoever I absolutely need to hear about it because it would bear on my future expeditions
If there is this single wolf dog hybrid pack maybe only one in Europe that I happened to encounter I absolutely need more information. feral dogs that would possibly go unnoticed in Belarus has crossed over to Latvia?
I have never heard of anything like that
All wolf incidents as rare as they are in Poland or anywhere have been with lone wolves that are sick or hungry and have lost their feir of humans
I have never heard of an aggressive wolf pack in Europe or anywhere on the planet
I have seen wolf droppings so many times and spent so much time day and night in wolf territory that I would never expect them to be so aggressive about human scent or sound like that
I have certainly had wolves near me many times but never heard a peep. In Sweden and Norway on long expeditions all summer and even winter and on and off for years from Spain to France Belgium Germany Poland and now here in the Baltics for one month so far direction Finland
The pack was in full alarm with barking and an occasional howl that dogs will still use. But much less than wolves. Wolves never bark together like this in any circumstance I have ever heard it seen if
It is with near certainty the pack of dogs that have hunted there before that happens to live on the farm on the opposite side of the road and escaped west around thousand metres into the forest.
Perhaps they do this regularly but no one cares
And now I happened to be there
Hiking and trekking and wild camping is MUCH more common in Sweden and Norway than anywhere in the world even Finland that is a close second. It is the Scandinavian spirit. As has recently been proven paleo lithic pre farming humans breed into the farming population only in Scandinavian nowhere else in Europe. I am personally absolutely at peace in nature and hate combustion engines that bother few others
Without getting off track completely I am continuing my expedition around Europe and almost all ground breaking record breaking endeavour of exploration has come from Scandinavia specifically. First settlement of the new world five hundred years before another European country etc etc etc first man on the south pole endless list of did what no one else could ot would. I am not placing my breed on a pedestal just explaining that if anyone would encounter something like this most likely it would be a Swede and the locals are most likely entirely puzzled why I am not living my life in doors at home or in a comfortable guest house
But this is beside the point just a side track to explain my presence in this rare encounter

in hindsight what happened

It is clear to me now that a pack of large hunting dogs. Not the small loud ones. Tax in Swedish. I have never owned a dog or hunted. I am a scientist. So I don't know much of anything about dog breeds. But presumably Large dogs that can hunt and kill on their own that have been trained to not kill the prey but only stalk it or drive it and make a loud alarm to draw the apes (not condescending just scientific classification of my species)
This is all speculation I just can't imagine what I heard to be a pack of tax (Swedish) small rabbit hunting dogs. These were large animals certainly with courage to act alone without humans
But I don't know anything about common hunting dogs in this region or anywhere so I can't suggest what breed it could have been that could behave this way
When I yelled at them they silenced for a moment then the roar continued
They had no intention to move back. I called for a police to meet me on road p111 and moved. I could hear the dogs for one thousand metres which gave me the impression that they moved after me at a safe distance perhaps curious about what I was
Again. If wolves can ever in any circumstance behave with this curiosity or aggressive confidence on human scent AND loud roaring. I yelled at them as a three hundred kilos silver back gorilla would try to show how big and powerful he was. No wolves ever no matter how big their biggest packs are in Europe would do anything but withdraw. These animals stayed at a distance and gave me the impression that they followed me on the road even. But not close
Distance is extremely uncertain but my best guess would be five hundred meters
This location has been used before for hunting and these dogs have been released during supervised legal (presumably) hunting in this exact location
They have smelled or sensed a wild animal and followed it into the forest where they have hunted before

will anyone stop this. how common is this

The police said they would call the nearest farms and ask about their dogs and the hunters that set up the hunting towers there in that old railway road where the dogs live that they bring to hunt there
But unfortunately I don't expect them to do anything when the response is "I know nothing". This is obviously a massive incident since I told them I am a scientist that will likely enquire with other scientist and if they cover this up it will explode big time. this is not s minor incident
Jägarna is a popular Swedish movie about the sad reality of this kind of stuff. anything related to mis management with hunting or dogs is so deeply rooted in human behaviour since the stone age that the local police do anything they can to forget about it. "Probably just a barking deer" or "wolves are common in the forest" and might bark despite my sincere explanation that this is hunting dogs not wolves and carries a prison sentence if heard in front of a magistrate
if you imagine "i like logic circuit design" the absolute opposite is "i like dogs and hunting". it's as different as a von Neumann machine is from sticks and stones in technological achievement. and a massive education effort is still needed for that population should they not cause a complete collapse of civilization like 1930s Germany. you might like NATURE you certainly don't like fire arms or dogs. has nothing to do with investigating nature. it is not conscious behaviour. but only photographers and hunters visit nature? you are obviously not a scientist ("what is this?" looking at bowling ball in small Lebowskis bath room. "you are obviously not a golfer")
I don't expect them to even ask anyone and just hope I forgot about it or they never have any other hikers near that spot at night
The "police report" that I received when they returned from the spot I told them to investigate was exactly that "it was probably just a deer and now I will go home and sleep". that only told ne that the pack had moved or did not respond to a car or they went to the wrong place or most likely could not be less motivated to find them
I gave the female officer that spoke English a stern explanation what would happen in Sweden. Prison. Absolutely nothing else than prison. Grave negligence in dog oversight. No hunting license and no dogs for the rest of his life
This is extremely serious that this is seen as a minor mistake that hunting dogs are stalking wild animals alone at night. Only in Sweden do we understand clearly that HUMANS are in the forest at night sometimes. We have palaeolithic blood lines and the world's foremost paleo biologist among other things. I am a renowned explorer. My father and uncle is one of the world's foremost wildlife photographer for WWF NG etc. Wild life is strictly monitored and controlled and this kind of neglect is absolutely treated with utmost sincerity
Our society is not in a state of civil war. Escaped hunting dogs hunting alone at night. Prison. Period. And the local police that tries to suppress it or treat it with a yawn will be investigated by internal affairs and released from service and prohibited from similar work with a responsibility to investigate seriously
We in sweden have the most aggressive policy in the world to combat this suppression of neglect related to hunting from the local community or any kind of coverup attempt or failure to investigate serious neglect, crime or not, we are not "paragraph riders" (paragraf ryttare) we investigate serious problems. anyone can understand how serious this is before digging after paragraphs

more about dog behaviour in general that might be relevant

Regarding dogs that hunt alone. I will not name any names but I have met a couple that lived in a remote valley in Portugal where their two large extremely aggressive dogs (even after ten minutes they were extremely uncomfortable with my presence and would not listen to their owner's calm regarding my encounter near their caravan on Canary islands) hunt together and bring home food. Literally drag it home to the family. Needless to say they have no kids and I will not say more about it more than the point that large dogs can easily on their own learn to hunt wild game. Possibly several breeds. They are still all close relatives of animals that do exactly that to survive. Guard territory identify intruder stalk and hunt prey is their basic behaviour anything else would result from actively counter acting instinctive behaviour that has become common to convert security staff patrol units and killers to social support animals because morons absolutely need to own a dog
Recall that in less developed countries like Chile dogs bark all night EVERYWHERE and run free in the day
I was in Chile for six months and never encountered dogs at night but had to suffer through the incessant noise if "guarding" at night. EVERYONE has night guard dogs. it is completely incomprehensible if you ever passed first grade with honours that they blindly follow a relict tradition for no other reason. Those dogs are GUARD dogs that have no experience of hunting ever. And when they encounter a human in the forest during their daily adventure they are never aggressive that far away from home
In western Europe outside Spain almost never dogs that bark all night. Same in Latvia. Two weeks in Lithuania don't think I ever heard a dog at night. A welcome serenity from Chile that I just arrived from after completing my record breaking expedition there

Father's Day is a special occasion dedicated to honoring fathers and celebrating their contributions to their families and society. It's a day to express gratitude and love for the men who have played a pivotal role in our lives. While the date of Father’s Day varies across different countries, the sentiment remains universally cherished. Here’s a guide to when Father's Day is celebrated around the world and some ideas on how to make it special.
Father's Day in the United States and Many Other Countries
In the United States, Father’s Day is celebrated on the third Sunday in June. This tradition is followed by many other countries, including the United Kingdom, Canada, India, and most European and Latin American countries. For 2024, Father’s Day in these regions falls on June 16th.
Origin of Father’s Day in the United States
The idea of Father's Day in the U.S. was inspired by Mother's Day. The first Father's Day celebration was held on June 19, 1910, in Spokane, Washington, spearheaded by Sonora Smart Dodd, who wanted to honor her father, a Civil War veteran and single parent who raised six children. It wasn’t until 1972, however, that Father’s Day was officially recognized as a national holiday by President Richard Nixon.
Father’s Day in Different Parts of the World

When is Father's Day: Celebrating Dads Around the World

Father's Day is a special occasion dedicated to honoring fathers and celebrating their contributions to their families and society. It's a day to express gratitude and love for the men who have played a pivotal role in our lives. While the date of Father’s Day varies across different countries, the sentiment remains universally cherished. Here’s a guide to when Father's Day is celebrated around the world and some ideas on how to make it special.
Father's Day in the United States and Many Other Countries
In the United States, Father’s Day is celebrated on the third Sunday in June. This tradition is followed by many other countries, including the United Kingdom, Canada, India, and most European and Latin American countries. For 2024, Father’s Day in these regions falls on June 16th.
Origin of Father’s Day in the United States
The idea of Father's Day in the U.S. was inspired by Mother's Day. The first Father's Day celebration was held on June 19, 1910, in Spokane, Washington, spearheaded by Sonora Smart Dodd, who wanted to honor her father, a Civil War veteran and single parent who raised six children. It wasn’t until 1972, however, that Father’s Day was officially recognized as a national holiday by President Richard Nixon.
Father’s Day in Different Parts of the World

1. Australia and New Zealand: Father's Day is celebrated on the first Sunday in September. This year, it will be observed on September 1st.
2. Brazil: Known as Dia dos Pais, Father's Day in Brazil is celebrated on the second Sunday in August, aligning with the Catholic feast day of St. Joachim, the father of the Virgin Mary. This year, it falls on August 11th.
3. Germany: In Germany, Father's Day, or Vatertag, is celebrated on Ascension Day, which is the 40th day of Easter. It’s also known as Men's Day (Männertag), and this year, it will be celebrated on May 30th.
4. Thailand: Father’s Day in Thailand is celebrated on December 5th, coinciding with the birthday of the late King Bhumibol Adulyadej. It is a day of national celebration and respect for fathers.
5. Russia: In Russia, Father’s Day is observed as Defender of the Fatherland Day on February 23rd. It honors men in general, especially those serving in the military.

How to Make Father’s Day Special
Regardless of when you celebrate Father’s Day, here are some thoughtful ways to make the day memorable for your dad:

1. Personalized Gifts: Custom-made gifts such as photo albums, engraved watches, or personalized mugs can add a special touch.
2. Quality Time: Spend the day doing something your dad loves, whether it’s fishing, hiking, watching a movie, or playing a sport.
3. Cook a Special Meal: Treat your dad to a homemade meal with his favorite dishes. You could also host a barbecue or picnic if the weather permits.
4. Handwritten Letters: Write a heartfelt letter expressing your gratitude and love. Sometimes, words from the heart mean more than any store-bought gift.
5. Experience Gifts: Plan an experience rather than a physical gift. Consider activities like a day trip, a concert, or a cooking class.
6. Virtual Celebration: If you’re far away, set up a video call and celebrate together virtually. You can still share a meal, play games, or watch a movie simultaneously.

Conclusion
Father's Day is a wonderful opportunity to show appreciation for the fathers and father figures in our lives. Whether your dad is near or far, there are countless ways to make the day special. Understanding when Father’s Day is celebrated around the world helps us appreciate the diverse ways in which this important day is honored. No matter the date, the essence of Father’s Day lies in expressing love, gratitude, and respect for the men who have guided, supported, and loved us unconditionally.
Father's Day is a special occasion dedicated to honoring fathers and celebrating their contributions to their families and society. It's a day to express gratitude and love for the men who have played a pivotal role in our lives. While the date of Father’s Day varies across different countries, the sentiment remains universally cherished. Here’s a guide to when Father's Day is celebrated around the world and some ideas on how to make it special.
Father's Day in the United States and Many Other Countries
In the United States, Father’s Day is celebrated on the third Sunday in June. This tradition is followed by many other countries, including the United Kingdom, Canada, India, and most European and Latin American countries. For 2024, Father’s Day in these regions falls on June 16th.
Origin of Father’s Day in the United States
The idea of Father's Day in the U.S. was inspired by Mother's Day. The first Father's Day celebration was held on June 19, 1910, in Spokane, Washington, spearheaded by Sonora Smart Dodd, who wanted to honor her father, a Civil War veteran and single parent who raised six children. It wasn’t until 1972, however, that Father’s Day was officially recognized as a national holiday by President Richard Nixon.
Father’s Day in Different Parts of the World

When is Father's Day: Celebrating Dads Around the World

Father's Day is a special occasion dedicated to honoring fathers and celebrating their contributions to their families and society. It's a day to express gratitude and love for the men who have played a pivotal role in our lives. While the date of Father’s Day varies across different countries, the sentiment remains universally cherished. Here’s a guide to when Father's Day is celebrated around the world and some ideas on how to make it special.
Father's Day in the United States and Many Other Countries
In the United States, Father’s Day is celebrated on the third Sunday in June. This tradition is followed by many other countries, including the United Kingdom, Canada, India, and most European and Latin American countries. For 2024, Father’s Day in these regions falls on June 16th.
Origin of Father’s Day in the United States
The idea of Father's Day in the U.S. was inspired by Mother's Day. The first Father's Day celebration was held on June 19, 1910, in Spokane, Washington, spearheaded by Sonora Smart Dodd, who wanted to honor her father, a Civil War veteran and single parent who raised six children. It wasn’t until 1972, however, that Father’s Day was officially recognized as a national holiday by President Richard Nixon.
Father’s Day in Different Parts of the World

1. Australia and New Zealand: Father's Day is celebrated on the first Sunday in September. This year, it will be observed on September 1st.
2. Brazil: Known as Dia dos Pais, Father's Day in Brazil is celebrated on the second Sunday in August, aligning with the Catholic feast day of St. Joachim, the father of the Virgin Mary. This year, it falls on August 11th.
3. Germany: In Germany, Father's Day, or Vatertag, is celebrated on Ascension Day, which is the 40th day of Easter. It’s also known as Men's Day (Männertag), and this year, it will be celebrated on May 30th.
4. Thailand: Father’s Day in Thailand is celebrated on December 5th, coinciding with the birthday of the late King Bhumibol Adulyadej. It is a day of national celebration and respect for fathers.
5. Russia: In Russia, Father’s Day is observed as Defender of the Fatherland Day on February 23rd. It honors men in general, especially those serving in the military.

How to Make Father’s Day Special
Regardless of when you celebrate Father’s Day, here are some thoughtful ways to make the day memorable for your dad:

1. Personalized Gifts: Custom-made gifts such as photo albums, engraved watches, or personalized mugs can add a special touch.
2. Quality Time: Spend the day doing something your dad loves, whether it’s fishing, hiking, watching a movie, or playing a sport.
3. Cook a Special Meal: Treat your dad to a homemade meal with his favorite dishes. You could also host a barbecue or picnic if the weather permits.
4. Handwritten Letters: Write a heartfelt letter expressing your gratitude and love. Sometimes, words from the heart mean more than any store-bought gift.
5. Experience Gifts: Plan an experience rather than a physical gift. Consider activities like a day trip, a concert, or a cooking class.
6. Virtual Celebration: If you’re far away, set up a video call and celebrate together virtually. You can still share a meal, play games, or watch a movie simultaneously.

Father's Day from Rakhi.com is a wonderful opportunity to show appreciation for the fathers and father figures in our lives. Whether your dad is near or far, there are countless ways to make the day special. Understanding when Father’s Day is celebrated around the world helps us appreciate the diverse ways in which this important day is honored. No matter the date, the essence of Father’s Day lies in expressing love, gratitude, and respect for the men who have guided, supported, and loved us unconditionally.

I was hired by a 3 Michelin Star restaurant as a Commis Chef (prep cook) and relocated across the country to do so. I've been here 7 months and it's been mostly hell. I've been screamed at in front of the whole kitchen by management, berated by other cooks, bullies, has things physically thrown onto my cutting board, been threatened with termination and more. I was supposed to get a relocation compensation, but HR said it was a "miscommunication". I'm treated like an idiot and all I do is measure ingredients and pick flowers.
I've had 3 work injuries since starting because I'm rushed to go fast in an unsafe way. Most recently I got Covid after management told a symptomatic, Covid positive employee to take his mask off because he thought they were faking. I sent HR a complaint and have been ignored. Every day is just one big anxiety attack and I'm missing work to the point it's hurting my reputation. Every kitchen I've interviewed with around here has only negative things to say about the restaurant and how they treat employees.
I recently was offered a job at another high end restaurant without any stars but with multiple James Beard Awards attached to it. I'd get more experience working on the line in a fast paced but high caliber environment. During my working interview I felt happier than almost any day I've been here and the people seem nicer and helpful. The restaurant itself is not as clean, but my current job actively hides violations from the health department. I asked my old mentor for advice and he recommended staying for a year, but even the thought of that scares me. I'm becoming a meaner more bitter person and I don't want to become that.
I came here to work at this restaurant and I don't want to deal with the bullshit anymore, but I don't want to fail the people who believe in me back home or view myself as a failure for leaving after 7 months. I know not all cooks have the opportunity to work at a 3 star restaurant and don't want to squander the opportunity, but at this point in my culinary career I have more experience picking flowers than working on the line and I feel it's a big gap in my education that this new job could fill and I'd feel better mentally as well. I don't want to make the wrong decision and any advice is greatly appreciated.

I was hired by a 3 Michelin Star restaurant as a Commis Chef (prep cook) and relocated across the country to do so. I've been here 7 months and it's been mostly hell. I've been screamed at in front of the whole kitchen by management, berated by other cooks, bullies, has things physically thrown onto my cutting board, been threatened with termination and more. I was supposed to get a relocation compensation, but HR said it was a "miscommunication". I'm treated like an idiot and all I do is measure ingredients and pick flowers.
I've had 3 work injuries since starting because I'm rushed to go fast in an unsafe way. Most recently I got Covid after management told a symptomatic, Covid positive employee to take his mask off because he thought they were faking. I sent HR a complaint and have been ignored. Every day is just one big anxiety attack and I'm missing work to the point it's hurting my reputation. Every kitchen I've interviewed with around here has only negative things to say about the restaurant and how they treat employees.
I recently was offered a job at another high end restaurant without any stars but with multiple James Beard Awards attached to it. I'd get more experience working on the line in a fast paced but high caliber environment. During my working interview I felt happier than almost any day I've been here and the people seem nicer and helpful. The restaurant itself is not as clean, but my current job actively hides violations from the health department. I asked my old mentor for advice and he recommended staying for a year, but even the thought of that scares me. I'm becoming a meaner more bitter person and I don't want to become that.
I came here to work at this restaurant and I don't want to deal with the bullshit anymore, but I don't want to fail the people who believe in me back home or view myself as a failure for leaving after 7 months. I know not all cooks have the opportunity to work at a 3 star restaurant and don't want to squander the opportunity, but at this point in my culinary career I have more experience picking flowers than working on the line and I feel it's a big gap in my education that this new job could fill and I'd feel better mentally as well. I don't want to make the wrong decision and any advice is greatly appreciated.

Before we get into it, I am a shitty brother. l'm not going to hide from it, I'm not going to excuse myself from it. I am a shitty older brother. Before we start, need to give you guys some context into my terrible psychological state. I grew up abused by my mom. I know it sounds like I have a victim complex but it's true. She was only 26 when she had me, and my dad was working all the time on his business in a foreign country. She didn't know how to raise my sister and me, and I was an energetic and mischievious little kid. I was also naive, and unaware of what people thought of me, and I was a nose picker. So for that, I got bullied at school for it. From ages of 7-12, I was bullied in middle school for picking my nose, and going home to getting beaten by my mom. She would also lock me out of the house and make me beg to come back inside our house. She would hit me out of frustration, hit me when she was mad, when my grades weren't as good. I was frustrated by the double standards of how my parents treated me and my sister, so I took my frustration out on her. I beat her too. The more my mom beat me, the more I beat my sister. Because I thought that's what family does right? Take your frustration out on each other when you are unhappy with something else. But I realized my sister went through the same shitty situation as me and I could never understand that because I was only focused on my own pain, and my own situation. But last year, in September 2023, I beat her so badly it left marks on her body. I don't need to go into detail, but it was bad. Like she almost called the cops, really bad. I don't think I can ever be forgiven.
My sister has tried to cope with her psychological state by smoking weed, an act done out of rebellion.
My father uses the silent treatment on my sister, even though I tell him to try to speak to her and have a conversation. My sister also used to cut herself, a fact that we seem to ignore in our house. She still carries the marks on her thighs, and it breaks my heart every time to think that I might be the cause of it. She's also a lesbian, something that I've always never cared about, and she knows that I accept her sexuality, not sure if my father or mother accepts her.
My sister thinks I am sexist, and that I hate women.I don't blame her because she's heard the way I talk about my mom(who is a horrible woman, i.e.), and she's experienced the way l've treated her. I can argue that I only hate the women in my family and that I've experienced positive relationships with other women I am unrelated to, but from her POV, it's hard not to agree with that. I have anger issues, stemming from my childhood, the abuse I experienced, and the emotional scars I carry. My pain is valid, but the way I treated her is illegal and immoral. I can't speak with her, because she hates me, and won't listen to a word I say After I did what I did, she told my mom, "He's not my brother, he's my abuser."
These are words I think l'll carry for the rest of my life. The guilt is killing me, and I just want us to go back to the way when we were kids when it was just me and her playing and having fun.
I hear the way she talks to my parents behind my back but my eyes are open now, but I fear I'm too late. She'll never see me the same way as I was that day. I'm the villain in her story, whereas I've only seen her as an obstacle, not as a sister.
She doesn't regard me as a brother anymore, just as a toxic person, or someone to tolerate before you cut out of your life.
What can I do to get her to forgive me and repair our relationship? Cause the guilt is fucking killing me, and I don't know how to live with knowing the only person who understood what I went through hates me.

On Feb. 9, 2022, I officially became "Homeless" on state record and applied for rent and housing assistance in Knoxville through KCDC/Section 8.
Per today's date:
Zeitraum = 825 days aka 27.123 months. This is exactly the length of time I've been surviving homeless.
It wasn't until THIS YEAR that my name "officially" has gone from being on their "PRE-waiting list": aka the long-ass waiting list you're on BEFORE graduating to the "OFFICIAL" waiting list.
*Btw, no one informed me of this being their process. I waited for many hopeful months while living out of my car, waiting to be called that I contacted them to get the news of only being on the PRE-waiting list- List. Good shit...
So, I decided to visit KCDC in-person last week to speak to them about my still pending status and ask if there were any actions I could take to help my chances of having a place to call home...
FYI: The Broadway location is ONLY for applying to any of their listed complexes. Unfortunately, ALL their waiting lists are also completely full.
*The Harriet Tubman location is for applying or relating to receiving vouchers for financial rental assistance.
FYI: you can ONLY APPLY for a voucher between their generous hours of 8AM-3PM only on the 2nd WED of each month, just fyi for any new applicants.
All I was told at each location was to "continue waiting" and that I would one day be contacted whenever my name came up.
The housing costs in Knoxville, especially have risen quickly dramatically even since when I very first began applying and they'll continue this trend.
**BTW, they're SHUTTING DOWN our Homeless Shelter on Broadway due to a LACK OF FUNDING (good timing), so yet another option we can all cross off our lists of any places to lie our heads down at night.
Pretty ironic that TN is the FREAKING VOLUNTEER STATE, considering... "GO VOLS", am I right??
See news link here: https://www.wate.com/news/knox-county-news/the-foyer-a-low-barrier-knoxville-homeless-shelter-set-to-close-as-officials-seek-new-operato
Oh yeah, HOMELESSNESS IN TN is also now a CLASS E FELONY!
*You are automatically disqualified from receiving public assistance such as Section 8 and SNAP benefits unless you've fully paid off ALL FEES (up to $3,000 for being homeless) and have fully completed your probation period! *KEEPING THINGS REALLY CLASSY, TN! 😜 (Also, you can't sleep in your vehicle at any rest stops, either. Also illegal. You can sit there in your car for only 3hrs max.)
"In Tennessee, felonies are classified from A to E, with Class A being the most serious and Class E being the least severe. A Class E felony in Tennessee is the lowest level of felony. It includes offenses such as theft of property valued at $1,000 to $2,500, certain driving offenses like third or subsequent DUI offenses, stalking, and forgery. The typical punishments for Class E felonies in Tennessee include: 1. One to six years of imprisonment (PRISON TIME, not jail), and/or 2. Fines up to $3,000. (Also, just pointing out that with any Class E felonies, being the "least" serious felony, if any fines for the offense are deemed as "unspecified" in their books, they then have the capability to charge an offender up to $50,000.)
However, these punishments can vary based on a variety of factors such as the exact nature of the crime, whether or not the defendant has a prior criminal record, and other relevant factors considered by the court." See specifics here: https://codes.findlaw.com/tn/title-40-criminal-procedure/tn-code-sect-40-35-111/
Covertly, they've named this abomination as the:
"Equal Access to Public Property Act of 2012.” Makes it sound so helpful and positive for us, doesn't it? Thanks, guys! LOL!
See below what all is covered, including: **If they happen to search and find any of your stored belongings (likely being at times literally their entire life's possessions, including if they find you've stored your food somewhere) the police will immediately confiscate it, and then you will have a total of 90 days to go to them and claim all your belongings or else they'll consider it as "abandoned property". You must detail exactly where on the property that they found your items, so that they then will slap you with a Class E Felony, charge you a "holding fee" for whatever amount of time they "stored" it for you, also stating that "the court shall include an order of restitution for any property damage or loss incurred as a result" of you or your belongings being present on the state property. But hey, at least you get your items back!
https://law.justia.com/codes/tennessee/2021/title-39/chapter-14/part-4/section-39-14-414/#:~:text=It%20is%20an%20offense%20for,agency%20responsible%20for%20the%20land.
My Story: (if you've made it this far and give any shits about hearing it for the sake of context.)
Around 1 year-deep into the COVID-19 pandemic, I had been living in an expensive house centered in the North Knox Historic District, working FT at a job I'd spent the past few yrs diligently climbing their ladder, and splitting the house payment with my then, Fiancee of 5 1/2 yrs. He began dating a different girl, had moved her into our house, while stating that "If I didn't stop being depressed, he was going to kick me out". Unfortunately, the house had been put solely in his name when bought. You see, my grandmother had just passed from COVID-19, my childhood best friend had just passed away, and I had been informed suddenly that my 84yrs-old dementia-ridden Father was getting worse and also nearing his last days. Not long after, my older sister contacted me acting upset, stating that he now needed to be on continual watch for FT care, so I packed my things, left my fiancee and my then home and moved in to care for my late father. Eventually, I had to leave my job to fulfill my caretaking duties but I don't regret being there for my father but it grew to be very difficult times, as it was for many those yrs. Dad passed away Jan. 31, 2022. My mother immediately inherited the house at his death, per their messy divorce agreement many yrs before. She so graciously left no time after me literally watching him take his very last breath in the bedroom down the hall from my own for her to serve me immediate eviction papers, now forcing me to leave the home that I grew up with my father in, while being raised. This house, I had only 1 year previous, agreed to my mother and sister when they had requested this of me, quit my long-term, FT job, losing all my sources of income in order to live with and solitary care for my father. (Everyone else- meaning my mother and 3 sisters -were all "too busy" to help me out or give even short breaks. I'm informing you of this, so that anyone that ever says to themselves, "why don't they just go live with family", can comprehend how that's not an actual option for everyone, so when the systems are failing, ppl aren't always on the streets or living out of their cars bc of drug problems or laziness or whatever other common misconceptions I've heard from ppl that are limited in grasping these situations for others. That last month that he was still alive, they all "forbade" me from leaving the house at all nor having any visitors "for his health", despite my deep despair from watching his health ferociously decline, resulting in my very rapidly declining mental health and massive weight-loss and over-exhaustion. Upon receiving my eviction notice, I then immediately began applying for Section 8 assistance. I had no one left and nowhere to go. It's like this for a lot of people. Don't assume ppl always have any other options available, is my point of giving so much backstory. Not exactly trying to "victimize" myself here for pity. I'm strong, I've got this. Just trying to get some points across for when you judge another's situation that you don't know.
Ok, here's the last I'll say about all this. Just humor me and try to consider what I'm pointing out here.
Every single one of us local TN natives have seen through the years how various homeless individuals will bravely step into some of our favorite local diners, gas stations, retail stores, etc. Them, asking employees permissions for maybe utilizing a restroom, some cold water or a drink, often after them walking around most the day (shelter kicks everyone out once it's morning), often after being in our unforgiving weather or high temps. Sometimes, they're asking even for a small bite to eat or leftovers from the kitchen. SO MANY times throughout the years, we've all been standing by, as we witness some enraged employee or the manager angrily decline, followed with often loud threats of calling the cops on them, etc in an attempt to motivate them to not come back asking later, as now they see how many of their annoyed paying customers are actively shaking their heads and shaming their whole interaction with rotten looks of disgust.
I mean after all, our businesses ABSOLUTELY can't be taking any risks of "losing their dedicated customers, just BC some "lazy bums" keep showing up, "always asking for free handouts" and "scaring away our business".
Really, it's best to just not give them anything in the 1st place cus ya know, just like strays, they'll "just keep showing back up"...
Right?
Excluding sometimes a random kind individual's exception, for the most part this mindset I'm highlighting here has most often worked as an sorta unspoken "Golden Rule" when we're relating to how we'll decidedly "handle" our large and growing homeless population.
Now that our housing prices have fully skyrocketed, with increases markedly on the rise almost immediately after the COVID-19 Pandemic that left so many of us without income that was supporting our access to necessities. Many, many "middle-class" individuals who were previously working averaging their 5 days/week (ty past labor strikes enforcing our allowance of 2 days off) and living comfortably on their 40hrs/week paychecks are currently struggling to find availability and also afford even a 1br ran-down apartment in our "lower-class" neighborhoods. Most are now working multiple jobs trying to keep up, and childcare isn't offered for free, so it keeps everyone from having opportunities to not only spend time raising their children vs random strangers who are also overworked, but how can you save money when you're losing part of what you earn, just to be able to go to work and not be fully abandoning your children to fend for themselves if left home alone?
Often, homeless ppl can be seen all throughout our city, and guaranteed to be growing in mass numbers when inching closer toward that underpass leading up to the Historic Gay St./Downtown/UT campus/Cumberland Strip. *It's really fairly ironic I've thought, how so much of our income has always been made/spent here, however we're required each time, to first drive through the huge crowd of terribly unfortunate ppl left standing without their bare necessities, often left to sleep outside the packed shelter when it hits capacity, which is always a guarantee. They're not left outside strictly bc they're "on drugs", like a lot have been led to believe.
Lastly, but oh of such an amazing relevance-
**Here's some realism surrounding our cultures' universally pre-conceived (disconnected/egotistical and mis-informed), accepted stigma that states the following phrase:
"These ppl just won't get a job bc they're SO LAZY and just want to live off all us hard-working American's tax dollars...blah blah blah.." Employers won't hire if you don't have an address and the shelters fail to deliver anyone's incoming mail, nor do businesses want to hire a homeless person showing up without proper hygiene or attire or any kind of criminal record. Also, transportation is a bitch. KAT bus costs money, and is very limited on its area services. By walking such lengthy distances, not only can your safety be at risk (especially for Females or any shifts beginning or letting out after dark) but you're gonna be super sweaty and gross by the time you actually arrive to then work a full shift, if you can even somehow make it on time every day by walking for hours before and then after every single shift that you show for.
This isn't any kinda "new" issue for the poor, btw. Don't be such heartless fools, making someone else's situation about "you".
Life's realities can forcibly humble an individual, catching us off-guard for what we'll often end up facing. Always count your blessings and never assume you know anything about anyone else's struggles or how they got there. We're all just trying to survive in this place.
Thanks for reading and hopefully this info helps bring insight to whomever reads this. Good luck out there, I mean it. We got this. ❤️

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Hi. I don't know how i found this subreddit i just googled some stuff ended up here and read some posts. Just to clarify I dont have a diagnosed CPTSD? I'd just like to share how my life has been because I genuinely have my whole life been thinking either what the fuck is wrong with my life theres no way this is normal and then sometimes i just think that im overreacting and my life has been completely normal. I'd like to know if im just imagining it or not I guess. Also I'd like to add that im doing somewhat better and im not experiencing THOSE bad thoughts anymore so please don't like report my account for being a danger to myself (I think that's a feature on reddit?). Im still a bit messed up but like still MUCH better than I used to be.
Honestly I read this whole thing and im adding here that I rant a lot maybe im just ranting about all the bad things in my life... Just a warning I guess. Don't read this if that's not what you want to read, this ended up super long sorry. Also I dont know if this is even relevant anymore. Half of this rant is about my family and other half about other bad things that happened I think. I don't know if this sub is only about like family stuff im sorry if this is the wrong place. Also trigger warning I had some thoughts about ending it and some self harm.
The first 10 years of my life were semi normal from my memory. Its been a while since those times and I dont remember it that well. I remember my parent's fought semi often (which is normal?) and some of my earliest memories were them yelling, fighting at night, my mother going out at night and yelling that shes never coming back, and a few times my mother doing stuff like talking in a scary voice and i remember crying and saying it was scary I think but she just kept doing it (while it was night and I was probably trying to sleep/go to sleep). I was also the middlechild so my parents always treated my older and younger sibling better like them having better stuff to some amount but not like a ridiculous amount. I also remember being scolded a lot by everyone if I did anything slightly wrong even by accident and I remember my brothers not being scolded at all if they did anything similaworse. Anyways I still mostly remember being semi happy and my life being somewhat normal if not just completely normal and im just focusing too much on the bad stuff. I also remember having sleep paralysises and nightmares a lot around when i was like I'd assume up to 12 years old and a weird thing i realized some time ago is that a lot of time in those nightmares/sleep paralysises the monsteperson that was scaring me was either of my parents. Anyways maybe im just reading into things and its a normal dream. I genuinely don't know if im just being a weirdo and my life was normal and im reading too much into stuff I dont want to pretend like my life was bad if it wasn't im just wondering so please don't get angry at me if its not im just wondering. Oh also my family really never spent much time with me atleast I dont remember them being around and mostly working when I wanted to play. I also remember my mother avoiding me like when I asked to spend time with them they just said no and to do something else. I was really bored as a child but I had videogames atleast so I mostly spent my time around them. Oh also 1 person who I thought was my friend beat me up at school because I said something mild not even at them that their class was worse than ours? I also passed out at school and I dont remember why and I remember my big brother just walking by me without saying a word when I had awoken in the hallway (they saw me and just ignored me...)
Anyways. When I turned 11 or so we moved while I was still in middle of elementary school so I had to leave the few friends I had behind (but my brothers didnt as the other was just beginning elementary school and other was entering middle school). I didn't really make any friends within the school and the few I did dropped me out when they realized I wasn't exactly popular. The teacher and other kids made school hard and while I usually achieved perfect grades i started barely passing in school because of how much I hated it. I also started forgetting stuff too and the teacher scolded me a lot because of that. I started being bullied to some amount by the other kids and my teacher so I started stress eating a lot and got kinda fat. Then they started bullying me about me being fat. I also had really no friends or contacts. I remember being extremely stressed out and my big brother making fun of me because of that. Then I remember getting depressed. I started not really trying anything anymore. My family didn't help they made fun of me being fat. Also I remember not really being physically attacked much but im pretty sure I at some point complained about my big brother hitting me with a controller in my head. But I dont remember if that actually happened? Knowing them it might have. Anyways I remember crying every morning around this age until I didn't anymore. I cried almost every morning because I didnt want to wake up and go to school and my parents sent me there anyways. The kids there made fun of that too I remember one of them asking "why is (me) crying every day" and someone answered to them "that I must be so happy"? Anyways eventually I stopped crying. I just didn't feel anything anymore other than anxiety and sadness and anger rarely. Mind you, through this my family didn't give a fuck about how I went from a somewhat happy child to someone who stayed inside all the time, went from healthy to fat within like a year and didn't feel anything anymore. They just focused on their own things. I started getting suicidal thoughts. I remember when I was a child (even younger) and I learned what suicide ment. I remember wondering why the hell anyone would ever want to do that. And now I felt like I wanted to do that. That's how bad I felt. I remember thinking what my family would think/how they would react if I drowned myself in the river. I went outside often at random times and just thought about doing it. I walked by this like electricity thing and I thought if I touched it would it kill me. Mind you these were just thoughts. I never actually acted to the point that I tried to do anything and I dont think I was doing that bad. I didn't act on these thoughts. I remember once coming home from one of these walks hoping they would wonder where I had been since I was like 12 and my mother just smiled at me (almost like she knew I was trying to get attention from them and with like an evil smile rather than a good one?) and said I was just outside walking to the others. I remember even thought I was the one who played the most games in my family, we got a PS3 and the old PS2 went to my littlebrother along the old TV from my big brother. Even thought the other played only a little and the other didn't play at all ever. I don't know if I was just being a brat but it felt bad taken that videogames were the only thing that made me a bit happy in my home. I remember them doing other stuff too like my big brother often telling me to kill myself, doing stuff like pointing a toy gun at me and like pretending to shoot me and telling me to stop pretending like i was misunderstood (I was depressed and having suicidal thoughts... at 12). Other things I remember is a teacher calling me fat (made me feel a bit bad...) as a joke and my teacher sending me to a class for trouble children with bad grades (even thought I told her I got a bad grade on the exam because no one told me that we had an exam so I couldn't read for it. I was sick when they said we had one btw in school which is why I didnt know) and even thought I clearly didn't belong to that class since the other people seemed to actually not be able to get good grades, i started trying in school just a bit so they would see my grades are good and get me out of that class since I felt bad being there because the others made fun of me because of that too. The teacher there was an ass who constantly spoke to me and the others like we were braindead and i genuinely hated her. It was clear I didnt belong there but they just kept me there the rest of the year. I started sleeping like only 3 hours a night since I was 11 until highschool ended because I didn't want the next day to begin. I just stayed up all night playing games and doing other stuff. Pretty much always other than vacations and weekends I slept like 3-5 hours only. I think that made my grades even worse and I don't remember much from some years of my life where I slept the least im assuming because of the lack of sleep? Or depression idk.
Anyhow things stayed like this. I felt extremely bad and had no motivation but I just kept on living my life. Later on when I went to middleschool at 13 years old I found for the first time some friends. I felt somewhat better, like I belonged for the first time in my life. My depression went away somewhat. Other things stayed the same thought my family still acted the way they always did. Still with my friends I felt like I was okay. I forgot about how bad my life had been a few years. I still had a challenge getting that close to anyone and didnt have self confidence and didnt feel outright happy but I was somewhat okay. I remember at the middle of middle school I got depressed again. I didn't remember that it was a feeling I had always had the past few years because back then I was so out of it. I remember just feeling like there was a void in my heart like to the point it physically hurt every now and then. I guess I realized that more than half of the middle school was over and I knew my friends would leave me behind when it's over since I had a hard time getting too close to them. And that's what brought the depression. I remember some months after since I still felt depressed telling my mother I was depressed and she just kept on working and saying in a monotone voice that "oh really? that means you have to go to therapy". And it scared me I didnt know what that would be like so I just said never mind and walked back to my room. Anyways middle school ended none of my friends stayed in contact I got super depressed. Because of my lack of good grades other than the last half few months which is the only time period where I tried and got very good grades, my overall average in middle school almost prevented me from getting to high school. I remember my dad just saying that "sorry I guess you tried your best it wasn't enough" something along those lines. Like wtf I didnt try my best I was depressed and slept 3 hours and didnt study at all so I could spent all my time with videogames and my few friends so I could feel a little bit of happiness in my life. I didn't have the fucking motivation to study at all... Anyhow I got to highschool.
So highschool was the worst. But honestly im getting tired of writing. I had THOSE bad thoughts again, we have to go to army when we get out of highschool in my country so that scared the hell out of me, I didn't focus on school was bullied, family was just causing problems. No wait I do want to write a couple things here. When I was 17 i developed bad OCD. I didnt go out of my room anymore. I didnt want to touch anything that had been in my school and then anything that had touched those things I didnt want to touch either. Something called contamination OCD apparently? I spent at ages 17 to 18 probably 2-5 hours average daily on compulsions. I felt like a mindless puppet. I keep thinking how much better grades I'd have got if i spent that time on studying. Once my big brother really invaded my personal space and it upset me and made me so stressed because of OCD related stuff that I took a semi sharp object from my TV remote and slashed my leg a few times to a point that I still can see the scar. I also got angry and felt bad easily when I lost in a videogame or such and sometimes bit my hand in anger. My parents also wanted me to go to army instead of trying to not go there (theres a few alternatives). But at this point I stopped liking my family. So i knew I was not going to do that or what they want. I had dreamed since I was 15 of when I'd get to move away and never see these people...
Anyhow. Im 23 now. I worked through a lot of my issues. Not fat anymore. I go outside now. I sleep a normal amount. I exercise. My OCD i managed to best atleast to the point that im able to function mostly normally like I wouldn't even have it. Still depressed probably I don't remember what it felt like to feel to be honest so I don't know if I am depressed? Haven't had THOSE thoughts in many years. Haven't self harmed myself in years. Still have no friends because i have quite a bad social anxiety due to my life. Still thought for the first time in years... maybe since I was 11. I feel like my life is not going a steep downhill. I feel like it's getting better actually. And i've felt like that some time as of writing this as I began to fix my life and my issues.
The most annoying thing is... it's been so many years. My life has changed so much. The family I have im still in ties with to some amount even though I'd like to not be. They dont seem bad now? That bad? But I still want to get away from them completely and never see them. I just FEEL like I need to do that. But I dont know if they even were that bad. That's what I want to know here. Is my family normal. Is there something wrong with me and I imagine they are bad? I might end up deleting this post and my account. This is just a throwaway. I just want to know. I need outside input. I've been so alone that I never had that. I need to know if im imagining that I had a bad life or if it was not normal. I literally feel like I cant view my past objectively because I can't remember much. There were happy memories too in my childhood. A lot of them. Atleast some years of it. Im just picking the bad examples. I managed to enjoy some of my time back then. I just cant realize whether theres something wrong with other people especially my family and the bad people in school or if im the problem. If you actually read this, anyone, thank you. You probably know more about my life and existance than anyone else other than me since I've spent so much of my life alone.

I (16M) have been exposed to porn since a young age of I think 8 or 9. Sure enough, when puberty hit me I immediately began to masturbate to porn since 2020. I went deeper and deeper through weirder and weirder fetishes and I realized what an adverse effect it was having upon my life. Affecting my grades, social life and time with my family. I have tried to quit several times doing NoFap and what not, but eventually I give in to my fantasies and relapse. It's to the point that it is affecting me mentally, I have problems with social interaction and I cannot interact properly with even my family. I try to control my habit but I go back to where I was, sometimes masturbating 10 times a day.
I tried smoking when I was 14 out of curiosity, did not like it, but that didn't stop from doing it constantly. I guess it was about looking "cool" and peer pressure. I did not realize when I got addicted, I used to only smoke when I was out with friends but eventually I started doing it in my home. I've had a few close calls with my parents and they probably suspect me, but they have no concrete evidence that I smoke as of yet. I have been smoking at least 3 cigarettes per day for 1 year. More when I'm home alone. I did not see it as a problem as I thought I would be able to quit whenever I wanted to, but that wasn't really the case. My Dad is an active smoker, so sometimes I would steal cigarettes from him when he wouldn't realize. Where I live it's not that hard to buy packs of it, availability is quite convenient.
I have tried to quit both of these on several occasions but fail to do so, and sometimes think I may never be able to. I have begun to hate myself, sometimes acting out irrationally and frequently having arguments with my parents. I can't seem to focus on studies anymore, all that goes into my mind are these two things. The thing that also haunts me is that if I quit these, will I be able to have fun in my life? I know there are other things to enjoy, but I feel I am addicted to an extent that I can't seem to enjoy the other things in life.

My daughter is currently in kindergarten. Her teacher approached us and said she would like to put her in second grade next school year and skip 1st grade. My daughter started reading at 3 and everyone around has comment that she's advanced for her age. I'm obviously quite proud but a bit concerned about the social aspect. She's physically small for her age 25 percent on the growth chart. What are people's experience with having a kid skip a grade? I'm concerned about classmates being older, making new friends, leaving her old friends behind, bullying, etc.
My wife wants to do it cause my daughter gets bored at school right now.
Thanks

We just got back from a wonderful trip in the northern part of Italy with our 3-year-old. Having spent 2 weeks on one of our best trips so far, I really want to thank a bunch of fellow redditors who helped refine our itinerary and suggested places which otherwise would not have made it to our plan!
Day 1 Milan: We took a flight from India and landed in Milan in the afternoon. Milan was just the arrival point for us and we did not intend to visit Milan as such, so we ended up booking a room in the hotel at the Malpensa Airport itself. Nothing much that day; a bit of rest and a delicious dinner were a great start to our trip.
Day 2 Drive from Milan to Bellagio: Woke up after a good night's sleep (a much needed one after the long sleepless flight the day before). Breakfast at the hotel was really good with a lot of options for everyone. We had booked a car through SIXT at the Malpensa airport. Getting the car was a breeze with great service from the representative at the SIXT counter. The drive to Bellagio was a very good one. I was still getting used to the car, since I come from a land of right-hand drive and switching to a left-hand drive meant putting in a lot more focus on the road. Driving along the Lake Como was a fantastic experience. We reached Bellagio by lunch time and our AirBnB was ready for us. The rest of the day was at leisure, with a casual walk around Bellagio, through the city center and along the lake.
Day 3 Bellagio to Varenna: Took a ferry to Varenna and had breakfast at a lake side cafe. With great weather on our side, a cup of coffee and a little pastry seemed more blissful than we thought of! We had signed up for a picnic on the hills of Camaggiore, a 40-minute drive from the Varenna ferry station. We had our representative waiting for us and she drove us to the picnic spot, sharing tales from the towns of Lake Como, showing us amazing views along the way. The picnic itself was surreal, with the most beautiful view of the lake from 1200 meters above. We spend the rest of the day exploring Varenna at our pace, while our little one slept like a log in the stoller.
Day 4 Bellagio: After debating weather to visit the Como town or not, we decided to stay in Bellagio in explore the town a bit more. We took a ride of the Bellagio Express, the toy train that takes you around the town. It was a fun ride, intended for our toddler, who decided to doze off in the train itself! Post that, we saw the gardens of the Villa Melzi. We had rented a boat to explore the lake ourselves during the evening, but rainy weather made us cancel our plans. We spent the rest of the evening, relaxing at our AirBnB, overlooking the lake.
Day 5 Drive from Bellagio to Gardaland: Moving on to the next leg of our trip, which was clearly planned keeping our little boy in mind, we drove to Gardaland reaching there by noon. Thanks to a wonderful fellow Redditor, we got introduced to this wonderland called Gardaland! Our stay was booked at the Gardaland Hotel and while we were waiting for our room to get ready, we decided to pay a visit to the Gardaland Resort park right away. A drizzly weather kept most of the visitors inside the SEA Aquarium, but that also meant we had absolutely no waiting times on most of the rides in the park! The little one was elated to see the Peppa Pig Land, and refused to move away from it. All in all, day one in the park was a super success despite the wet weather. Evening at the hotel was full of fun-filled activities for the kids. The entertainment team at Gardaland Hotel did a fabulous job at keeping kids engaged.
Day 6 Gardaland: Our second day in the Gardaland park was a much more planned one, since we had already explored some of the park on the previous day. We knew the rides we wanted to go on, and so logistics were simpler. Weather was great too, and so we had a wonderful time! The park has a plethora of options to eat, with a ton of sweet treats along the way. The park is huge but very well laid out with clean facilities. Naturally, day two also could not be completed without visiting our favorite Peppa Pig! Evening at the hotel was again fun-filled with the team at Gardaland doing what they do the best!
Day 7 Parco Natura Viva: Gardaland is in proximity to a lot of amusement parks and points of recreation for family and friends. One of them is Parco Natura Viva, a zoo with a drive-through safari. It was a Saturday and the zoo had enormous waiting times for the cars to enter the Safari. After having waited in the queue for over an hour, we finally started the Safari, which turned out to be pretty great. Next, we had the fauna park (the walkable part of the zoo), the one with animals in their enclosures. With the entire park divided into geographical zones, it was fun seeing animals from various continents. The place is well-maintained, and creates a great experience for kids.
Day 8 Verona: We had kept an extra day in Gardaland just in case the little man wanted to visit the park again. However, given the proximity, we decided to do a day trip to Verona instead. We drove to Verona and parked our car in one of the paid parking lots. We had reserved a morning slot for a walking tour, that took us through the streets of Verona, with our very knowledgeable guide sharing tales from historic Verona, the castle and gate to the old city center. The center was bustling with stores and eateries. Very touristy but was all the more fun! Our taste buds were craving for some Indian food and we ended up having lunch at an amazing Indian restaurant named "Maharajah". The food was delectable with very prompt service. As touristy as it sounds, we did go to "Casa di Giulietta", commonly known as Juliet's house that is known for the legacy of Romeo and Juliet having been inspired from there. The so-called Juliet's balcony is missable at best.
Day 9 Drive from Gardaland to Venice: Switching to the last leg of our trip, this was supposed to be the wife's part of the trip. She has wanted to visit Venice for as long as she remembers, and this trip could not have happened without a leisurely stay in the city of canals! This was also the last day of us keeping the car, and we drove to Venice Marco Polo Airport where we returned the car at the SIXT counter. Once again, just like the pick-up the return process was extremely smooth and lasted barely a couple of minutes. Our plan was to catch the Alilaguna airport water bus to the main island, but we decided to splurge at the last moment and took the water taxi instead. And boy were we happy! The water taxi is an experience in itself, especially when entering the canals from the airport. Our AirBnB was located right on the Grand Canal, giving us uninterrupted views of the Canal. For a place that looked better in person than in pictures, what more could we have asked for! We spent the evening walking to the Rialto Bridge, people-watching!
Day 10 St. Marks square and Dodge's Palace: After a good night's sleep, we woke up refreshed, taking in the morning views of the Grand Canal, with the gondola's and the various boats floating by, doing their chores for the day. We had booked a tour of the St. Marks square and the Basilica, along with the Dodge's Palace. Unfortunately, it had to be a rainy day. While we still participated in the tour, the place became very crowded because a lot of people tried to maximize on the time indoors to avoid the rain. Nonetheless, it was a good experience. The little one dozed off in the Basilica and so we let my wife carry on with the tour of the palace, while I took a table under an umbrella at the Cafe Lavena to get myself some coffee, and to let my son enjoy his sleep. We spent the evening loitering around the Rialto market, spoiling ourselves with a few gelatos at Suso!
Day 11 Murano, Burano and Torcello: We woke up early, fixed ourselves some breakfast and were ready to leave. We had booked a tour of the 3 islands and our job was to get to the meeting point as soon as possible. Unfortunately, we missed our group and had to visit the islands on our own. The upside to this was that we could do it at our own pace! This included having a hearty lunch at a beautiful local cafe in Torcello. This place had a chidren's play area too! This also meant spending more time than necessary in Burano, because why not? We loved the colorful houses on the island and we just wanted to be there, taking in everything it had...
Day 12 Leisure and Photoshoot: My wife and I generally have this idea of booking a small photoshoot at every exquisite location we visit. This not only gives us great pictures for memories, but it also allows us to see areas which we would otherwise not know existed. We booked this experience through AirBnB and our photographer was a wonderful man, very learned and a true Venetian at heart! He took us to places that were free of tourists, for some amazing pictures. Not only that, he also arranged for a special Gondola ride for us, which took us through the narrower canals of Venice, adding to the already special experience. A trip to Venice is really incomplete without a Gondola ride, and we were glad we could! This was the last evening of our trip and we could not conclude it without a few more Aperol Spritz's and Gelatos from Suso!
With every trip we take, we learn a lot, that helps us make our future trips better. We consciously chose to skip the more popular locations like Rome and Florence (Tuscany), since we wanted to have ample time of leisure and just do nothing, with a toddler who wanted to just be.
If I could summarize the learnings of this trip, they would be:

• Travelling with a toddler is great, if you leave a lot of room for rest and leisure. It not only allows you to be, but it also leaves scope to rome around the place and absorb the local life beyond the tourist favourites
• Lake Como has a lot to offer. While day trips from Milan sound good, staying in a Lake Como town lets you enjoy the serenity of the lake in a more intimate manner. A couple of days at the least, three days to make it worth while.
• Driving around Lake Como can be fun, but can also become a bit intimidating if you are trying to drive slow on the roads that circle the lake and there are cars behind you, trying to get ahead. Staying calm is the key!
• Gardaland is unchartered territory for people outside Italy, and if travelling with kids, must find a place in the itinerary.
• We had a lot of people advising us against spending 4 days in Venice, but we do not regret it even a bit. Venice is a city unlike anything we've been to so far. It is very difficult to imagine the daily life of the people living there, unless you decide to stop and slow things down yourself, experiencing the little things that the place has to offer.
• It is absolutely ok to not cover every point of interest at a place you are staying. Ticking everything off the list does not give the same satisfaction as enjoying the few things that you do, at a pace that you like.
• Lastly, strollers are a boon, even with the cobbled streets. They serve a great deal for quick afternoon naps, as well as meal times. It indeed is a pain carrying them over the hundreds of bridges in a place like Venice, but the pros still outweigh the cons.

I just need to vent about the girls next level pod episode where bridget, Holly, and hefs son, Marston talked about crystal hefners book.
I made a post on that reddit but they're mostly loyal holly-bridget fans.
Here's my thoughts:
Crystal has her faults for sure but they just seemed to be going IN on her. I didn't really care for their insistence that there would a "correct" or "right' way to relay her experiences. They kept saying "well she should have just said it like this" it's like but why? It's doesn't seem very fair to say what a person should and should not do when it comes to explaining their own personal experiences. "If she wanted the bag and run then she should just said that" like what? This is HER book lol
Holly has been acting weird with crystal for years! Back on old Twitter accusing her of copying. Holly was the one who left and wanted to back off being associated with hugh and the mansion soooo....At the end of the day does it matter? Like I don't even remember or know wtf she was specifically accusing crystal of copying. I just remember her constantly making the claim. Honestly it's silly and a bit childish.
The other thing I found bizarre is the claim... "why didn't she just leave" like aren't we evolved enough as a society to dispell "women can just leave"...women stay in abusive situations well past the point the average person would.
For fucks sake doesn't holly more or less make a claim like that too in her book.... that she stayed hoping things would get better?
IN THE SECRETS OF PLAYBOY the exposé on Hugh they depicted holly as someone who played 3 dimensional chess and manipulated her way to number 1 girlfriend and pushed other girlfriends out and what not. (This was claimed in a few episodes not just the st. James episode) I'm 100% sure holly would disavow those claims and would call it hersay so why accuse crystal of the same thing?
Marston is set on depicting his dad as, "a man with faults but at the end of the day we was a jolly guy who enjoyed board games."
I don't blame him for wanting to depict his dad that way... he is his dad, after all.
But goddamn talk about bending the truth and re writing history. Hef drugged girls, had them perform mass orgies through the use of coercion playing on the girls need for room and board, food and money not the mention the hope of being featured in the magazine. Holly and bridget openly ADMIT they wanted to be in the magazine! Hugh chose women to the youngest possible legal age. There's also allegations of beastiality.
There's no such thing as being there "for the right reasons" anyone who actively participated in his life inadvertently co-signed his behavior. However, I WOULD NEVER blame the women for the actions of that idiot. But just because you turned a blind eye and began to bond with your capture doesn't mean you're there for the right reasons.
Everyone was aware that he was a perverted dirty old man who had sex with newly aged adults. And they stayed. Why? Everyone had their reasons. Your reasons isn't more valid than anyone else's.
Also house mold comes from water damage, Marston himself corroborated there was mold.
Also the mansion was purchased right before hefs death and completely renovated after he died because the mansion was a piece a shit by that point and became a hoarders den.
Holly has spoken at length about how there was piles and piles of things everywhere and dog shit stains on the carpets and that Hugh refused to open a godamn window never allowing fresh air to circulate
The mansion was purchased in the 60s? Was never PROPERLY tended. I feel like the surface it seemed fine but footage of marys office/Hugh's room was always overwhelming to look at with the amount of piles of crap everywhere.
Did crystal exaggerate things or bend the truth. I have no doubts that she did.
Is she fucking with hefs legacy... absolutely, as she should. Did she take money from him? Absolutely, as should. Does she want to take 100% credit for her success and exploit the hefner name for her benefit while denying Hugh credit for her success when he definitely supplied her for the means to be successful? Absolutely, as she should.