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Astronomy

2008.03.28 15:00 Astronomy

The amateur hobby of humanity since the dawn of time and scientific study of celestial objects.
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2009.08.30 06:52 PlasmaWhore Pictures of things that look like other things.

Pictures of things that are recognizable as other objects. For example, a picture of a cloud that happens to look like a whale sword fighting a leprechaun.
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2009.11.03 22:07 ayrnieu 香港

A Subreddit for all things Hong Kong. From Travel, food, events, to local news and politics.
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2024.05.15 13:28 Fickle-Syllabub6730 Does anyone have any tips on how to stifle my laughter when a podcast becomes a circlejerk about how they're all workaholics?

I personally am not able to hold back the guffaws. In my career I've worked with blue collar guys who wake up at the crack of dawn to commute over an hour through trains and subways to bust their ass all day, who gobble up weekend overtime like it's nothing. I've worked with scientific researchers who uproot their families to live onsite at a laboratory, to check on their experiments and instrumentation day and night, and write papers for journals, review other papers, travel to conferences, all outside their 40 hour work week. I've worked with health care personnel and corporate employees who will answer a 1:20 AM email by 1:30 AM.
I'm sorry but these podcast guys don't even crack the top 50% of "hardest workers" I've encountered. I get it, this is a passion for all of them. They probably do genuinely think about their content when they're in the shower, as they go to sleep, when they're with their SO. They probably have had periods in their life when they put more than 40 hours a week continuously in getting content out. They probably see themselves as "working" or "doing research" when they watch other people's content, or even playing video games, and it contributes to their sense that they are "always on". They probably put effort into learning the business behind the scenes, how Youtube works, the ad payouts and all that. They probably do really fastidious stuff in their editing because they want their stuff to be perfect.
But my goodness, the way they talk about how they're "workaholics" would make you think they single-handedly built the transcontinental railroad. Yeah, you all took a risk and made a name for yourself in a niche passion field. You made videos for a year that only got 50 views and you stuck with it and blew up. But you do kind of just talk about video games all day. Your biggest health risk is a sedentary lifestyle and obesity. Your biggest mental health obstacle is trying to appear enthusiastic about an entertainment field every day without ruining the magic of the medium for yourselves personally. Most of them don't leave the house on a given day. You want to make a video game and write a book one day? Wow man, join the club.
They way these guys wax poetic about how no one can possibly understand their dedication and hard work because they stayed up til midnight one time to get a Pokemon video out genuinely makes me laugh. Especially when Colin talks about how he has smoked weed every day for the past 20 years and often wakes up in the PM. I'm interested if anyone has managed to keep a straight face during these discussions.
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2024.05.15 13:19 Eli_Freeman_Author No, Ezra and Sabine would not be a "ship"

To clarify, I now know that there are different definitions of the word “ship”, but for the purposes of this article and to keep things simple I will use the definition of “a relationship that’s rushed and/or forced with no real development.” I hope you can understand as I do not know of any other single word to describe that concept. If you do, perhaps you can tell me. Also, fair warning, this is long form content (some 10 pages), if you like it but can’t read it all at once you can save it and come back to it over a period of time, or you can stop reading whenever you get tired of it and still discuss those parts of it with me that you have read. But keep it civil if you want a civil response.
With that, to qualify the title, no, Ezra and Sabine do NOT absolutely have to be a couple, but if they were to become one, it would NOT be a ship. Ezra and Sabine’s relationship has had years of development. Could they remain as simply friends? Yes, but ironically, it was their “friendship” that felt like more of a ship. It felt like the Ahsoka show, helmed by Dave Filoni, was going out of its way to tell us: “no, they’re not a couple, they’re just friends.”
I believe that Filoni made some very poor writing choices to stress something that didn’t really need to be stressed, such that it almost felt like he was in denial. The line “I love you like a sister” was never in Rebels, Filoni essentially had that retconned in, and like many I was put off by their (largely) emotionless reunion. Even if they were “just friends” I believe there would be a great deal more emotion displayed between two people that hadn’t seen each other in some ten years, especially when one of them was in a precarious situation when they parted. I also believe Ezra would be far more curious about Sabine being Force sensitive, perhaps even offering to help train her when she told him that her training hadn’t gone as well with Ahsoka. He did help to train her with the Darksaber, didn’t he? Why that never came up is another discussion, but for now, let’s focus on shipping.
In case you think I’m desperate to have them as a couple, no I’m not. I’m about the furthest thing from it. Like many millennials and Gen-Z’ers (and perhaps some Gen-Xers and boomers) I DESPISE shipping. Absolutely DESPISE it. With a flaming passion. Perhaps for this reason, and maybe some others, like many millennials and Gen-Z’ers (and perhaps some Gen-Xers and boomers), I’m generally wary of nearly all romance in fiction, and generally avoid it in my own work. The sad reality is that romance is perhaps the most abused genre in all of fiction, all throughout history. It has been so badly abused that many people, including myself for the longest time, have equated romance with shipping, though I’m slowly beginning to see that they are not the same thing, and one does not necessarily have to go with the other.
But sadly, many writers, through time immemorial, have not been able to separate them, going back into ancient times and perhaps even into pre-history, that is before languages were actually written down. Some of what is considered great literature; classics like Romeo and Juliet, are predicated on shipping, though at least the consequences of this “whirlwind romance” are shown to be fairly stark. Star Wars itself is no stranger to shipping, resulting in a very awkward incestuous kiss when Luke was shipped with Leia, then Leia was placed with Han and Lucas made Luke and Leia brother and sister, apparently having forgotten his original ship. Later Lucas essentially shipped Anakin and Padme, resulting in some of the most cringeworthy dialog in the history of film. Many fans of the Prequels even have been somewhat critical of Anakin’s portrayal, particularly in regards to the “romantic” scenes, with many describing them as “creepy”. Some have speculated that this was intentional, though personally I think it was just the result of bad writing on the part of George Lucas, and an impatience on his part for Anakin and Padme to become a couple, hence “shipping”.
One might wonder why this is so prevalent in fiction, and tragically, one does not have to look far. Fiction is merely a reflection of reality, therefore the reason that shipping is so common in our stories is that we fall so easily into it in real life. Indeed, entire cultures may be based around shipping, or at least very heavily wrapped up in it. Throughout history arranged marriages have been the norm, and the idea of marrying for “love” is something relatively new. To be fair, I’ve actually met people in arranged marriages who seemed to be fairly happy, but those same people were very open in telling me that many despise that aspect of their culture, and that it is quite normal for those in an arranged marriage to try to get out.
People might come together for “love” without marrying, but even then it often creates expectations that might turn into a burden. Even when a marriage is voluntary and for “love”, people are often left unsatisfied, such that today in the West the divorce rate is something like 50%. Happy, stable, long term relationships seem to be the exception across cultures and across the breadth and width of time. And yet pursuit of love and some kind of relationship seems to be the highest calling for many people, both in real life and in fiction. And it could be that the accumulated disgust is finally starting to boil over.
To be fair, this may not be the first time in history that the pendulum has shifted. You may recall that in Victorian times attitudes changed drastically, as compared to the previously bawdy Elizabethan times. Looking at a play from Shakespear, if you can understand the language, you’ll see all kinds of vulgar references, as well as what I believe are fairly sappy romances like in the aforementioned Romeo and Juliet, though I can’t say for certain whether Shakespear was actually endorsing that type of attitude towards “love” or presenting it as a cautionary tale, maybe even something to be ridiculed in some of his other plays.
But regardless, Victorians as you may well know had a very conservative attitude towards anything to do with romance, and would often avoid the subject in many places, or tread very carefully around it, as if walking on eggshells. It’s not that people stopped being romantic, in fiction or real life, but it was treated as something very serious and even dangerous, with many urges repressed or even suppressed entirely. This had all kinds of effects on society, both positive and negative. On the positive side, it reinforced the ideal of people being committed to their partners, and of marriage as a sacred institution rather than a “casual hookup” as was more common in Elizabethan times. Likewise it reinforced ideals of modesty and chastity, which may be coming back into vogue, though under different names. But just as there were positive aspects to these attitudes, so were there negative ones.
Just because the urges I described were repressed did not mean that they disappeared. In fact, they often morphed into things that many would consider “unhealthy”. From one statistic that I saw, in Victorian times about one in every 60 houses was a brothel, with the modern rate being closer to one in 6000. Additionally, the rights of women were often repressed, such that they could not fully express themselves and find their own identity, and path in life, as individuals. Just as Elizabethan ideals gave way to Victorian ones, so did the Victorian ideals gradually begin to erode.
Perhaps it began with the Jazz Age of the 1920’s (the “Roaring Twenties”), or with the increased interconnectivity of people traveling to different parts of the world during World War I, not to mention the cynicism that pervaded throughout the West in response to failed old ideals leading to the deadliest war in history up to that point, but many Victorian ideals began to be seen as a joke, and even resented for their “oppression”, which to be fair was not entirely unjustified. But regardless, people gradually, and at times not so gradually, became more and more “liberated” and promiscuous. This culminated in the Sexual Revolution in the late 1960’s, when what had previously been seen as a vice and even a sin was now seen as not only “normal” but as a healthy form of expression, a virtue even. And just as these ideas were embraced in real life, so too were they reflected in our films, TV shows, and other media, often to the consternation of older people and institutions, like the Vatican. The Catholic Church even went so far as to “ban” certain films, that is to declare them immoral for good Catholics to watch. Many of the films that were banned back then, or at least controversial, like The Graduate with Dustin Hoffman, are fairly tame by today’s standards.
It continued through the 70’s, at times warming and at times cooling through the rest of the century, until you could argue it reached a kind of crescendo in the early 21st century with the advent of so-called “dark romance” and the publication of books like Fifty Shades of Grey. (Ironically, many of the themes within this “dark romance” can trace their roots back to the Victorian era, yet another indication that repressing urges without addressing them often doesn’t work out as one might hope.) But as happens all too often, just as something reaches peak popularity is when it begins to go out of style, and that is what we may be experiencing right now. As weird as it may sound, we may actually have come full circle and may be on the cusp of a “New Victorian Age” (complete with “dark romance”, even). Web sites like Porn Hub and OnlyFans, as well as other similar sites, may be the new “brothels”, and what was once openly celebrated may be going underground, to an extent. The effects of this on society have been interesting to say the least, and at times I would even say bizarre.
Whilst many younger people seem content with these changes, many older people are concerned. I’ve seen a number of books, films, and other media receive positive reviews for example based specifically on their lack of romance. Many of these books/films, etc. fall into the “young adult” category, meaning that it is young adults obviously who mostly consume them. At the same time I’ve heard a number of older people, mostly boomers and Gen-Xers, criticize these same books/films for their lack of romance. Even some older millennials seem upset by the changes, as perhaps evidenced by Jennifer Lawrence’s latest film No Hard Feelings (though to be fair that film may be lampooning the older generation’s frustration as well as the younger generation’s frigidity). So just as in the past older people were concerned about the promiscuity of the youth, now it actually appears that many older people are concerned about the youth’s lack of promiscuity.
Who could have seen that coming? But to be fair, the younger generation hasn’t gone completely frigid. As stated earlier, much of the promiscuity has gone “underground”, or online, which many would argue is not very healthy as it might undermine actual relationships, whether they are romantic in nature or simple friendships. And speaking of that, friendships within stories nowadays often aren’t portrayed in a very authentic or compelling manner, perhaps because in ditching romance modern writers haven’t quite yet learned how to replace it with something else. In other words, the “New Victorian Age” may not be an exact repeat of the previous one, but may have its own twists and turns, for better and for worse.
This may all essentially be a manifestation of the Human Condition, in that we just can’t seem to find a happy medium, neither in real life nor in fiction. Thus we keep swinging from one extreme to the other, apparently getting wilder with each swing.
So where does all this leave us? What is it that we really want in our lives, and in our stories? Especially in regards to relationships? I think at some level we all want to see good and healthy relationships between people and/or characters, whether romantic or platonic. I believe at some point we would like to see good examples of both friendship and romance, and I would argue that the best examples of romance have them combined. Even a toxic relationship, if well portrayed or documented, can be instructive and serve as a good example of what to avoid in our lives that we might be happier and relate better to each other. A good relationship, by contrast, can give us something to aspire to and inspire us to not only look for the right kind of person to complement our lives, but to make ourselves worthy of that person. And here I’ll add that I’m perfectly aware that in real life (and thus in fiction) relationships can be very complicated and heavily nuanced, with elements of both “good” and “bad” in them. Just as people change over time so can the relationships between them change, at times getting better and at times worse, sometimes breaking entirely and sometimes growing stronger. Relationships can have just as many layers and dimensions as characters, more even perhaps, and a skilled writer should be able to reflect this complexity. At other times a relationship can be fairly straightforward, simplicity sometimes being the best approach. But regardless, the audience should be able to relate and identify with what they are seeing, such that hopefully they can incorporate the lessons from it in their own lives.
Where can we find good examples of relationships to study? There may be a number of them in the real world, but the trouble with studying real world relationships is that they’re often much more complicated than fictional ones (just as real people are more complicated than fictional characters), and for many of them it is almost impossible to know all the details and nuances because they are often kept private, understandably so, and even if they aren’t it can still be difficult, due to unique circumstances, to see how to relate them to our own lives. Additionally there may be far more disagreement about a real life situation than a fictional one, with many more points of view. To keep things simple, for the purpose of this article I would like to focus on fictional relationships. (And fair warning, there will be some spoilers.)
One of the best places to look, I would argue, would be the films of Hayao Miyazaki. (And this is pretty significant to Star Wars as you will see in a bit.) A film of his that stands out to me the most is Princess Mononoke. Like many of Miyazaki’s films it has elements of romance, and yet subverts them in a way that makes complete sense and feels very genuine, without taking away from any of the accompanying charm. It starts with two young people, San and Ashitaka, and as soon as they encounter each other there is a kind of expectation of romance. This may be inevitable to some degree when you have a man and a woman of about the same age encounter each other in a story, especially if they happen to be adolescents. The expectation may not be inherently bad, and Miyazaki does play with it. Both characters are thrust into dangerous situations, at various points end up saving each other’s lives, and at a certain point I think it is obvious that they have feelings for each other. I was certain that at the end of the film, they would be together, and if things had gone that way, it would make complete sense. Instead, they go in different directions, but remain good friends, and considering their backgrounds and differing worldviews, this ends up making even more sense to the story.
Essentially, Miyazaki could have gone for the more conventional, tried and true “love conquers all” narrative, where the characters’ feelings for each other would negate everything that comes between them, they would somehow find a common ground in spite of their differences, the romance would not only take over the narrative but somehow also solve all the problems in the story, and then the couple would live “happily ever after”. Such an approach is not inherently bad or wrong, and is fairly common in Western media and storytelling. We can see it in films like Fern Gully, and more recently James Cameron’s Avatar, both of which have been compared to Princess Mononoke. As you can probably guess, the problem is that at a certain point such a narrative can become fairly simplistic, and lack nuance.
Miyazaki’s films, by contrast, are very heavily nuanced, and are anything but simplistic. In Princess Mononoke the characters San and Ashitaka don’t help each other simply because they are “in love”, but because it is the right thing to do, regardless of how they might feel about each other. Yes, romantic feelings are certainly alluded to, but they are not essential to the plot, for it could have worked just as well without any romantic allusions. And ironically, this makes those allusions even more valid, even if they are unrequited. How so?
Consider that if love is essential to a given narrative, is it not relegated to being nothing more than a plot device? Again, this is quite common in Western media and storytelling, and is not inherently bad or wrong, but when it becomes a trope or cliche, I believe it is the essence of where shipping comes from. Many storytellers get caught up in this, usually without realizing it, and while a story can still work even with shipping, I believe that it usually works that much better without it.
This extends not only to Miyazaki’s handling of romance but also to other things like environmentalism, the conflict between man and nature, and the contrasting ideals of human progress vs. preserving the natural order. Movies like Fern Gully and Avatar, as already mentioned, handle these themes in a fairly simplistic and I would even say hamfisted manner, whereby all progress and technology is shown as being inherently “bad” and in service to “evil”, while everything that’s “natural” is shown to be inherently “good”. Even our notions of good and evil, and right vs. wrong, are challenged by Miyazaki, with nearly all of his characters having complex motives and multiple dimensions to them, as well as understandable reasons for doing the things that they do. Rarely can any one of his characters be branded as a simple “villain”, and rarely is any one individual the source of conflict in his stories, again in contrast to most Western narratives.
I’ll reiterate once more, a simple, straightforward narrative is not inherently a bad thing, whether the themes being dealt with are romantic or anything else. Sometimes it is in fact the best approach. But the best stories in my opinion are usually the most nuanced, that challenge our notions of what we believe to be true, and that force us to think about what we do with our lives and what we could do differently. To that end Miyazaki introduces all manner of themes and motifs within his films that are familiar to us but shows them in a light most of us might not have considered, thus giving more dimension to our understanding of things.
“How is any of this related to Star Wars?” you might ask. It is quite related, and you don’t even have to look all that closely to see it. A very influential figure within Star Wars was very heavily inspired by the works of Miyazaki, and that figure is Dave Filoni.
This video shows the connections in some detail:
https://youtu.be/Q_4L0BbSpHo?si=04jDo6qFCnZT135w
But to summarize if you’ve seen any of Miyazaki’s films, especially Princess Mononoke, I think the callbacks in Filoni’s work will be all too obvious, especially in Star Wars Rebels. Some of the scenes in Filoni’s work look like they were taken directly from Miyazki’s films, and many of the same themes and motifs often come up. The relationship between San and Ashitaka I would argue is very similar to the relationship between Ezra and Sabine, and not just because both couples rode wolves together.
Incidentally, Dave Filoni was also heavily involved in Avatar: The Last Airbender, which I would also argue was at least to some degree inspired if not by Miyazaki then by Japanese anime in general. The relationship between Aang and Katara was developed with great care and was allowed to build very slowly, as opposed to simply shipping them. Likewise other characters very gradually developed as individuals and in their relationships, at times stumbling as they did so, and making mistakes, before finding their way back to the right path.
All of this is in stark contrast to George Lucas, whose character development is often very rushed at best, and at times some might say almost non-existent. So essentially, even though Lucas has said that Filoni has been “like a son” to him, and I believe referred to Filoni as his “padawan”, I would argue that Filoni is ultimately as much a student of Miyazaki as he is of Lucas.
Again, you might ask, “What does all this mean for Star Wars?” It means a great many things. It means that Dave Filoni has taken Miyazaki’s lessons to heart, and can handle things like romance, as well as other kinds of relationships, quite well most of the time. Like Miyazaki he can play with romance, tease the audience with it at times even, leave the romance unrequited, and yet still have it feel satisfying. A prime example of this is the love triangle that Ahsoka was involved in with the young Separatist Senator, Lux Bonteri, and Steela Gerrera. As wary as I am of romance and as much as I despise shipping, love triangles I normally despise even more, but this one seemed to actually work. It never took over the main story, and even though Ahsoka’s feelings were ultimately not reciprocated, she still learned from the experience, and grew and developed further as a character because of it. The other characters involved in this triangle also grew and developed from their involvement, though unfortunately not all of them made it. All in all it was a good bit of storytelling and gave the audience something to consider.
When a relationship in one of Filoni’s stories does bloom into a full blown romance he also generally handles it quite well. For one Filoni is sparing with actual romance, so that when it does occur, it can be that much more appreciated. And rather than rushing or shipping it, Filoni normally takes his time to build it up. An example of this is the relationship between Kanan and Hera. Some might argue that this is perhaps the best developed romance in all of Star Wars, at least in Canon. Built up over four seasons, at times it wasn’t certain whether it was a romance or a friendship, or perhaps even a professional partnership. Perhaps even the characters themselves were not certain, though it was hinted all throughout the narrative that something was going on. To this day I don’t believe anyone can say definitively when it became an actual romance, and I believe Filoni did this intentionally because he wanted to be subtle, rather than making things too obvious and having the romance take over the narrative, as it usually does. When it finally did become obvious as to what was happening, it felt very much earned, in a way that is seldom accomplished in other works of fiction, including Star Wars.
The relationship between Ezra and Sabine was also fairly well written, for the most part anyway, at least in Star Wars Rebels. Ezra was almost immediately smitten with Sabine, but being a young teenage boy, it was understandable that he would feel that way about an attractive girl. Over time he learned to see her more respectfully, as a colleague and even as part of his adopted family, not just as a pretty face. Sabine for her part found Ezra annoying at first (c’mon, what teenage boy isn’t?), but as he matured and she found out more about him she came to understand and respect him more, and see him as a friend and almost a brother, with there being potential for something more.
There were times when the relationship could have been better written, like in the episode “Blood Sisters”, where Ezra was written to be a bit too immature to make Sabine look wiser. But overall, the bond between them developed fairly well; both saved one another at various times, and took risks and made sacrifices for each other’s sake. Both reassured and comforted the other when they needed it, and it was endearing to hear their banter when they became more familiar and trusting of each other.
So why then was I so disappointed in how they were portrayed in the Ahsoka show? The thing is, after how well their relationship was built up in Rebels, as I’ve already mentioned it was strange to see how lackluster and uninspired their reunion was.
Within the Ahsoka show itself Sabine was shown to be almost obsessed with finding Ezra, living in what used to be his home, watching a recording of him over and over again, and calling out his name as she woke up in the middle of the night. She even risked bringing Thrawn back into the Galaxy, which ultimately happened, just so she could see Ezra again. After all that, when she finally does encounter him, her reaction seems fairly casual, as does his, as if they’ve been apart for no more than a week, rather than 10 years. Not too much happens between them afterwards either. Like I said Ezra does not appear all that curious about what happened with Sabine, how she found him, and how it was that she was now Force sensitive. Sabine likewise did not seem curious about what had happened with Ezra, and how he had gotten away from Thrawn. And with Ezra rescued and returned home, suddenly it didn’t seem as though Sabine was all that interested in him anymore, nor he all that concerned with her, though they were just as far apart as they had been at the start of the show. To be completely honest it made me wonder what the point of the whole show was. Were they just working to set up Thrawn’s return to the Galaxy? As some have said, Ezra felt like nothing more than a Macguffin in the show. Was Sabine and Ahsoka’s search for him just a plot device?
Considering how skillfully Dave Filoni had written his stories in the past, what happened in this latest project of his does not make much sense. Was he so concerned about “shipping” and so desperate to avoid it that he inadvertently “shipped” them in the other direction? Was there some sort of external pressure on him about how to write this story to have more of an appeal to “modern audiences”? Maybe some combination of those factors?
And here I’ll add that when I say “modern audiences” I don’t mean that in a contemptuous sense, though you may think I do. If there is any contempt on my part it is for those in charge of telling our stories, or those in charge of those telling our stories, who do not seem to grasp these basic truths. The truth is that audiences at their core don’t really change throughout the ages, only superficially so. Trends come and go but certain truths and ideals are eternal, and universal. How people relate to each other fundamentally does not change, whether they are friends, or more than friends. And deep down, I believe everyone (or nearly everyone at least) wants the same things. Nearly everyone at some point wants some kind of a connection with another human being, to know that they are not alone in the world, and to know that there is someone else who sees and understands things as they do. While this desire can certainly lead to abuse, and absolutely has, it is still innate to us and is not inherently wrong. Finding ways of connecting and relating to other people is one of the great challenges of life, but many would argue it is the most worthwhile of challenges. It may be the whole point of life if you think about it. As complex as it may be, many would argue it is what makes life worth living, and likewise makes for the best stories. Just as it may be the whole point of life many would say that is what most stories are about at their core: people trying to relate to one another.
Sadly, just as in real life, most stories unfortunately don’t quite get it, and the Ahsoka show in my opinion was an example of this, made all the sadder by the fact that Dave Filoni had done quite well with these characters up to that point. We may never know for certain what exactly went wrong and why, or if it can ever be “fixed” at this point, but I can’t help but feel curious. Maybe in the future Filoni will find a way to make it make sense, but I’m not sure how. And to be completely honest I don’t feel quite as enthusiastic to find out as I used to.
Also for the record I would like to add here that there are other factors that put me off from the show, such as Sabine’s Force sensitivity, that came about without much build up. But in this article I specifically wanted to focus on shipping because there seems to be so much misunderstanding around it.
I hope that I was able to clarify some, if not most of this misunderstanding, so that people could better appreciate what shipping is, where it comes from, as well as what it isn’t. Many people today are understandably sick of shipping characters, myself included. But I hope people realize that in overcompensating for something, we often come back around into the very thing that we are overcompensating for. Or sometimes, into something even worse. This may apply to nearly every facet of life, by the way, not just shipping. Finding a happy medium in how we portray our fictional relationships may help us to better understand relationships in real life, as well as how to navigate them. Neither fictional nor actual relationships can ever be perfect but they can always be better. To this understanding then I hope that I was able to give my own modest contribution, and if nothing else I hope we can connect on that.
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2024.05.15 13:14 Super_Baby1039 My heart just won’t get over her

Why is unrequited love so hard to get over
For reference I’m 18 M
To me was a bestfriend, she was someone that I never really expected to come into my life at that specific time but she did. Her and I had met at my school ball, she was one of my friends dates of which she didn’t like him and he liked her. I reached out to her one day because he wasn’t speaking very highly of her and then I guess the rest is history. I never ever had the intention to be anything with her she was so far out of my league; I mean she really is beautiful it’s amazing. But after that one message I sent her we just kept talking.
I met her at a time in my life where I was struggling to get over my ex… my only ex, it’s the same as what’s happening now I was hurt and couldn’t get over her but she helped me with that. I thoroughly believe that she got me over my first love and now I’m stuck not being able to get over her because ause I’m one of those boys that just feels hard. Once I feel i really feel. I am way too loyal for my own good. And she knew that she knew I had been hurt, she told me her fears about love and we both worked with each other unknowingly to get through that. What we didn’t know is what would eventually happen. This whole 1 year talking stage i had with her we really were pretty much together. I saw her a lot, dropped flowers off at her house randomly when she was sad, during wace she kept breaking down and everytime i knew she was I went over to hers with her favourite stuff for her, we were so many of each others firsts and it was incredible. I truly believe that is the deepest I will ever feel for anyone.
I eventually worked up the courage to ask her out and ask her to be mine. There was a spot she loved to go to. This lake with a walkway and a gazebo thing in the middle, I lit up the whole walkway with candles and fairy lights over the gazebo and eventually I got rejected. She used year 12 as an excuse and I should have known that was the first red flag before what was to come. I could never understand why she said no. We did everything couples would do. I met her entire family, her grandparents and mum would hug me we would sleep together on Friday nights after school. I surprised her going to her dance concerts with her mum and dad, when she got her diagnosis I was there for her to cry in my arms, we were emotionally inseparable. I was flabbergasted.
Eventually a few months later her and I had a talk and I told her how I truly felt, and she knew how my heart works and she just said that her and I have to call it quits, she was scared of what happened to her sister would happen to her and that it was all so overwhelming.
The last words we ever spoke to each other still resonate with me so deeply. “I’m sorry we can’t, I love you” and that was that. And this this hit my like a train. My best mate has never ever seen me cry until that afternoon. He is and still is genuinely worried for me because he knew how much of an impact she made on my life. Everything that was bad about me I managed to pick out of my life for her, I became a better boy for her. She brought out the best in me. And for what I thought would only be a few months I was fucked over her, I couldn’t even try and talk to any other girls because I found myself looking for her in them, which I will never find it’s impossible. And really the feeling of being needed the feeling of unconditional love I miss it. She and I never dated I was never her boyfriend. I’m trying to let go so I can move onto people I do really like personally but it’s just so difficult and I don’t understand why
….its now been just over a year and I can’t get her out of my head. Why is it so hard
submitted by Super_Baby1039 to BreakUps [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 13:14 Eli_Freeman_Author No, Ezra and Sabine would not be a "ship"

This is my attempt at a re-submission due to some misunderstandings on the first attempt. I now know that there are different definitions of the word “ship”, but for the purposes of this article and to keep things simple I will use the definition of “a relationship that’s rushed and/or forced with no real development.” I hope you can understand as I do not know of any other single word to describe that concept. If you do, perhaps you can tell me. Also, fair warning, this is long form content (some 10 pages), if you like it but can’t read it all at once you can save it and come back to it over a period of time, or you can stop reading whenever you get tired of it and still discuss those parts of it with me that you have read. But keep it civil if you want a civil response.
With that, to qualify the title, no, Ezra and Sabine do NOT absolutely have to be a couple, but if they were to become one, it would NOT be a ship. Ezra and Sabine’s relationship has had years of development. Could they remain as simply friends? Yes, but ironically, it was their “friendship” that felt like more of a ship. It felt like the Ahsoka show, helmed by Dave Filoni, was going out of its way to tell us: “no, they’re not a couple, they’re just friends.”
I believe that Filoni made some very poor writing choices to stress something that didn’t really need to be stressed, such that it almost felt like he was in denial. The line “I love you like a sister” was never in Rebels, Filoni essentially had that retconned in, and like many I was put off by their (largely) emotionless reunion. Even if they were “just friends” I believe there would be a great deal more emotion displayed between two people that hadn’t seen each other in some ten years, especially when one of them was in a precarious situation when they parted. I also believe Ezra would be far more curious about Sabine being Force sensitive, perhaps even offering to help train her when she told him that her training hadn’t gone as well with Ahsoka. He did help to train her with the Darksaber, didn’t he? Why that never came up is another discussion, but for now, let’s focus on shipping.
In case you think I’m desperate to have them as a couple, no I’m not. I’m about the furthest thing from it. Like many millennials and Gen-Z’ers (and perhaps some Gen-Xers and boomers) I DESPISE shipping. Absolutely DESPISE it. With a flaming passion. Perhaps for this reason, and maybe some others, like many millennials and Gen-Z’ers (and perhaps some Gen-Xers and boomers), I’m generally wary of nearly all romance in fiction, and generally avoid it in my own work. The sad reality is that romance is perhaps the most abused genre in all of fiction, all throughout history. It has been so badly abused that many people, including myself for the longest time, have equated romance with shipping, though I’m slowly beginning to see that they are not the same thing, and one does not necessarily have to go with the other.
But sadly, many writers, through time immemorial, have not been able to separate them, going back into ancient times and perhaps even into pre-history, that is before languages were actually written down. Some of what is considered great literature; classics like Romeo and Juliet, are predicated on shipping, though at least the consequences of this “whirlwind romance” are shown to be fairly stark. Star Wars itself is no stranger to shipping, resulting in a very awkward incestuous kiss when Luke was shipped with Leia, then Leia was placed with Han and Lucas made Luke and Leia brother and sister, apparently having forgotten his original ship. Later Lucas essentially shipped Anakin and Padme, resulting in some of the most cringeworthy dialog in the history of film. Many fans of the Prequels even have been somewhat critical of Anakin’s portrayal, particularly in regards to the “romantic” scenes, with many describing them as “creepy”. Some have speculated that this was intentional, though personally I think it was just the result of bad writing on the part of George Lucas, and an impatience on his part for Anakin and Padme to become a couple, hence “shipping”.
One might wonder why this is so prevalent in fiction, and tragically, one does not have to look far. Fiction is merely a reflection of reality, therefore the reason that shipping is so common in our stories is that we fall so easily into it in real life. Indeed, entire cultures may be based around shipping, or at least very heavily wrapped up in it. Throughout history arranged marriages have been the norm, and the idea of marrying for “love” is something relatively new. To be fair, I’ve actually met people in arranged marriages who seemed to be fairly happy, but those same people were very open in telling me that many despise that aspect of their culture, and that it is quite normal for those in an arranged marriage to try to get out.
People might come together for “love” without marrying, but even then it often creates expectations that might turn into a burden. Even when a marriage is voluntary and for “love”, people are often left unsatisfied, such that today in the West the divorce rate is something like 50%. Happy, stable, long term relationships seem to be the exception across cultures and across the breadth and width of time. And yet pursuit of love and some kind of relationship seems to be the highest calling for many people, both in real life and in fiction. And it could be that the accumulated disgust is finally starting to boil over.
To be fair, this may not be the first time in history that the pendulum has shifted. You may recall that in Victorian times attitudes changed drastically, as compared to the previously bawdy Elizabethan times. Looking at a play from Shakespear, if you can understand the language, you’ll see all kinds of vulgar references, as well as what I believe are fairly sappy romances like in the aforementioned Romeo and Juliet, though I can’t say for certain whether Shakespear was actually endorsing that type of attitude towards “love” or presenting it as a cautionary tale, maybe even something to be ridiculed in some of his other plays.
But regardless, Victorians as you may well know had a very conservative attitude towards anything to do with romance, and would often avoid the subject in many places, or tread very carefully around it, as if walking on eggshells. It’s not that people stopped being romantic, in fiction or real life, but it was treated as something very serious and even dangerous, with many urges repressed or even suppressed entirely. This had all kinds of effects on society, both positive and negative. On the positive side, it reinforced the ideal of people being committed to their partners, and of marriage as a sacred institution rather than a “casual hookup” as was more common in Elizabethan times. Likewise it reinforced ideals of modesty and chastity, which may be coming back into vogue, though under different names. But just as there were positive aspects to these attitudes, so were there negative ones.
Just because the urges I described were repressed did not mean that they disappeared. In fact, they often morphed into things that many would consider “unhealthy”. From one statistic that I saw, in Victorian times about one in every 60 houses was a brothel, with the modern rate being closer to one in 6000. Additionally, the rights of women were often repressed, such that they could not fully express themselves and find their own identity, and path in life, as individuals. Just as Elizabethan ideals gave way to Victorian ones, so did the Victorian ideals gradually begin to erode.
Perhaps it began with the Jazz Age of the 1920’s (the “Roaring Twenties”), or with the increased interconnectivity of people traveling to different parts of the world during World War I, not to mention the cynicism that pervaded throughout the West in response to failed old ideals leading to the deadliest war in history up to that point, but many Victorian ideals began to be seen as a joke, and even resented for their “oppression”, which to be fair was not entirely unjustified. But regardless, people gradually, and at times not so gradually, became more and more “liberated” and promiscuous. This culminated in the Sexual Revolution in the late 1960’s, when what had previously been seen as a vice and even a sin was now seen as not only “normal” but as a healthy form of expression, a virtue even. And just as these ideas were embraced in real life, so too were they reflected in our films, TV shows, and other media, often to the consternation of older people and institutions, like the Vatican. The Catholic Church even went so far as to “ban” certain films, that is to declare them immoral for good Catholics to watch. Many of the films that were banned back then, or at least controversial, like The Graduate with Dustin Hoffman, are fairly tame by today’s standards.
It continued through the 70’s, at times warming and at times cooling through the rest of the century, until you could argue it reached a kind of crescendo in the early 21st century with the advent of so-called “dark romance” and the publication of books like Fifty Shades of Grey. (Ironically, many of the themes within this “dark romance” can trace their roots back to the Victorian era, yet another indication that repressing urges without addressing them often doesn’t work out as one might hope.) But as happens all too often, just as something reaches peak popularity is when it begins to go out of style, and that is what we may be experiencing right now. As weird as it may sound, we may actually have come full circle and may be on the cusp of a “New Victorian Age” (complete with “dark romance”, even). Web sites like Porn Hub and OnlyFans, as well as other similar sites, may be the new “brothels”, and what was once openly celebrated may be going underground, to an extent. The effects of this on society have been interesting to say the least, and at times I would even say bizarre.
Whilst many younger people seem content with these changes, many older people are concerned. I’ve seen a number of books, films, and other media receive positive reviews for example based specifically on their lack of romance. Many of these books/films, etc. fall into the “young adult” category, meaning that it is young adults obviously who mostly consume them. At the same time I’ve heard a number of older people, mostly boomers and Gen-Xers, criticize these same books/films for their lack of romance. Even some older millennials seem upset by the changes, as perhaps evidenced by Jennifer Lawrence’s latest film No Hard Feelings (though to be fair that film may be lampooning the older generation’s frustration as well as the younger generation’s frigidity). So just as in the past older people were concerned about the promiscuity of the youth, now it actually appears that many older people are concerned about the youth’s lack of promiscuity.
Who could have seen that coming? But to be fair, the younger generation hasn’t gone completely frigid. As stated earlier, much of the promiscuity has gone “underground”, or online, which many would argue is not very healthy as it might undermine actual relationships, whether they are romantic in nature or simple friendships. And speaking of that, friendships within stories nowadays often aren’t portrayed in a very authentic or compelling manner, perhaps because in ditching romance modern writers haven’t quite yet learned how to replace it with something else. In other words, the “New Victorian Age” may not be an exact repeat of the previous one, but may have its own twists and turns, for better and for worse.
This may all essentially be a manifestation of the Human Condition, in that we just can’t seem to find a happy medium, neither in real life nor in fiction. Thus we keep swinging from one extreme to the other, apparently getting wilder with each swing.
So where does all this leave us? What is it that we really want in our lives, and in our stories? Especially in regards to relationships? I think at some level we all want to see good and healthy relationships between people and/or characters, whether romantic or platonic. I believe at some point we would like to see good examples of both friendship and romance, and I would argue that the best examples of romance have them combined. Even a toxic relationship, if well portrayed or documented, can be instructive and serve as a good example of what to avoid in our lives that we might be happier and relate better to each other. A good relationship, by contrast, can give us something to aspire to and inspire us to not only look for the right kind of person to complement our lives, but to make ourselves worthy of that person. And here I’ll add that I’m perfectly aware that in real life (and thus in fiction) relationships can be very complicated and heavily nuanced, with elements of both “good” and “bad” in them. Just as people change over time so can the relationships between them change, at times getting better and at times worse, sometimes breaking entirely and sometimes growing stronger. Relationships can have just as many layers and dimensions as characters, more even perhaps, and a skilled writer should be able to reflect this complexity. At other times a relationship can be fairly straightforward, simplicity sometimes being the best approach. But regardless, the audience should be able to relate and identify with what they are seeing, such that hopefully they can incorporate the lessons from it in their own lives.
Where can we find good examples of relationships to study? There may be a number of them in the real world, but the trouble with studying real world relationships is that they’re often much more complicated than fictional ones (just as real people are more complicated than fictional characters), and for many of them it is almost impossible to know all the details and nuances because they are often kept private, understandably so, and even if they aren’t it can still be difficult, due to unique circumstances, to see how to relate them to our own lives. Additionally there may be far more disagreement about a real life situation than a fictional one, with many more points of view. To keep things simple, for the purpose of this article I would like to focus on fictional relationships. (And fair warning, there will be some spoilers.)
One of the best places to look, I would argue, would be the films of Hayao Miyazaki. (And this is pretty significant to Star Wars as you will see in a bit.) A film of his that stands out to me the most is Princess Mononoke. Like many of Miyazaki’s films it has elements of romance, and yet subverts them in a way that makes complete sense and feels very genuine, without taking away from any of the accompanying charm. It starts with two young people, San and Ashitaka, and as soon as they encounter each other there is a kind of expectation of romance. This may be inevitable to some degree when you have a man and a woman of about the same age encounter each other in a story, especially if they happen to be adolescents. The expectation may not be inherently bad, and Miyazaki does play with it. Both characters are thrust into dangerous situations, at various points end up saving each other’s lives, and at a certain point I think it is obvious that they have feelings for each other. I was certain that at the end of the film, they would be together, and if things had gone that way, it would make complete sense. Instead, they go in different directions, but remain good friends, and considering their backgrounds and differing worldviews, this ends up making even more sense to the story.
Essentially, Miyazaki could have gone for the more conventional, tried and true “love conquers all” narrative, where the characters’ feelings for each other would negate everything that comes between them, they would somehow find a common ground in spite of their differences, the romance would not only take over the narrative but somehow also solve all the problems in the story, and then the couple would live “happily ever after”. Such an approach is not inherently bad or wrong, and is fairly common in Western media and storytelling. We can see it in films like Fern Gully, and more recently James Cameron’s Avatar, both of which have been compared to Princess Mononoke. As you can probably guess, the problem is that at a certain point such a narrative can become fairly simplistic, and lack nuance.
Miyazaki’s films, by contrast, are very heavily nuanced, and are anything but simplistic. In Princess Mononoke the characters San and Ashitaka don’t help each other simply because they are “in love”, but because it is the right thing to do, regardless of how they might feel about each other. Yes, romantic feelings are certainly alluded to, but they are not essential to the plot, for it could have worked just as well without any romantic allusions. And ironically, this makes those allusions even more valid, even if they are unrequited. How so?
Consider that if love is essential to a given narrative, is it not relegated to being nothing more than a plot device? Again, this is quite common in Western media and storytelling, and is not inherently bad or wrong, but when it becomes a trope or cliche, I believe it is the essence of where shipping comes from. Many storytellers get caught up in this, usually without realizing it, and while a story can still work even with shipping, I believe that it usually works that much better without it.
This extends not only to Miyazaki’s handling of romance but also to other things like environmentalism, the conflict between man and nature, and the contrasting ideals of human progress vs. preserving the natural order. Movies like Fern Gully and Avatar, as already mentioned, handle these themes in a fairly simplistic and I would even say hamfisted manner, whereby all progress and technology is shown as being inherently “bad” and in service to “evil”, while everything that’s “natural” is shown to be inherently “good”. Even our notions of good and evil, and right vs. wrong, are challenged by Miyazaki, with nearly all of his characters having complex motives and multiple dimensions to them, as well as understandable reasons for doing the things that they do. Rarely can any one of his characters be branded as a simple “villain”, and rarely is any one individual the source of conflict in his stories, again in contrast to most Western narratives.
I’ll reiterate once more, a simple, straightforward narrative is not inherently a bad thing, whether the themes being dealt with are romantic or anything else. Sometimes it is in fact the best approach. But the best stories in my opinion are usually the most nuanced, that challenge our notions of what we believe to be true, and that force us to think about what we do with our lives and what we could do differently. To that end Miyazaki introduces all manner of themes and motifs within his films that are familiar to us but shows them in a light most of us might not have considered, thus giving more dimension to our understanding of things.
“How is any of this related to Star Wars?” you might ask. It is quite related, and you don’t even have to look all that closely to see it. A very influential figure within Star Wars was very heavily inspired by the works of Miyazaki, and that figure is Dave Filoni.
This video shows the connections in some detail:
https://youtu.be/Q_4L0BbSpHo?si=04jDo6qFCnZT135w
But to summarize if you’ve seen any of Miyazaki’s films, especially Princess Mononoke, I think the callbacks in Filoni’s work will be all too obvious, especially in Star Wars Rebels. Some of the scenes in Filoni’s work look like they were taken directly from Miyazki’s films, and many of the same themes and motifs often come up. The relationship between San and Ashitaka I would argue is very similar to the relationship between Ezra and Sabine, and not just because both couples rode wolves together.
Incidentally, Dave Filoni was also heavily involved in Avatar: The Last Airbender, which I would also argue was at least to some degree inspired if not by Miyazaki then by Japanese anime in general. The relationship between Aang and Katara was developed with great care and was allowed to build very slowly, as opposed to simply shipping them. Likewise other characters very gradually developed as individuals and in their relationships, at times stumbling as they did so, and making mistakes, before finding their way back to the right path.
All of this is in stark contrast to George Lucas, whose character development is often very rushed at best, and at times some might say almost non-existent. So essentially, even though Lucas has said that Filoni has been “like a son” to him, and I believe referred to Filoni as his “padawan”, I would argue that Filoni is ultimately as much a student of Miyazaki as he is of Lucas.
Again, you might ask, “What does all this mean for Star Wars?” It means a great many things. It means that Dave Filoni has taken Miyazaki’s lessons to heart, and can handle things like romance, as well as other kinds of relationships, quite well most of the time. Like Miyazaki he can play with romance, tease the audience with it at times even, leave the romance unrequited, and yet still have it feel satisfying. A prime example of this is the love triangle that Ahsoka was involved in with the young Separatist Senator, Lux Bonteri, and Steela Gerrera. As wary as I am of romance and as much as I despise shipping, love triangles I normally despise even more, but this one seemed to actually work. It never took over the main story, and even though Ahsoka’s feelings were ultimately not reciprocated, she still learned from the experience, and grew and developed further as a character because of it. The other characters involved in this triangle also grew and developed from their involvement, though unfortunately not all of them made it. All in all it was a good bit of storytelling and gave the audience something to consider.
When a relationship in one of Filoni’s stories does bloom into a full blown romance he also generally handles it quite well. For one Filoni is sparing with actual romance, so that when it does occur, it can be that much more appreciated. And rather than rushing or shipping it, Filoni normally takes his time to build it up. An example of this is the relationship between Kanan and Hera. Some might argue that this is perhaps the best developed romance in all of Star Wars, at least in Canon. Built up over four seasons, at times it wasn’t certain whether it was a romance or a friendship, or perhaps even a professional partnership. Perhaps even the characters themselves were not certain, though it was hinted all throughout the narrative that something was going on. To this day I don’t believe anyone can say definitively when it became an actual romance, and I believe Filoni did this intentionally because he wanted to be subtle, rather than making things too obvious and having the romance take over the narrative, as it usually does. When it finally did become obvious as to what was happening, it felt very much earned, in a way that is seldom accomplished in other works of fiction, including Star Wars.
The relationship between Ezra and Sabine was also fairly well written, for the most part anyway, at least in Star Wars Rebels. Ezra was almost immediately smitten with Sabine, but being a young teenage boy, it was understandable that he would feel that way about an attractive girl. Over time he learned to see her more respectfully, as a colleague and even as part of his adopted family, not just as a pretty face. Sabine for her part found Ezra annoying at first (c’mon, what teenage boy isn’t?), but as he matured and she found out more about him she came to understand and respect him more, and see him as a friend and almost a brother, with there being potential for something more.
There were times when the relationship could have been better written, like in the episode “Blood Sisters”, where Ezra was written to be a bit too immature to make Sabine look wiser. But overall, the bond between them developed fairly well; both saved one another at various times, and took risks and made sacrifices for each other’s sake. Both reassured and comforted the other when they needed it, and it was endearing to hear their banter when they became more familiar and trusting of each other.
So why then was I so disappointed in how they were portrayed in the Ahsoka show? The thing is, after how well their relationship was built up in Rebels, as I’ve already mentioned it was strange to see how lackluster and uninspired their reunion was.
Within the Ahsoka show itself Sabine was shown to be almost obsessed with finding Ezra, living in what used to be his home, watching a recording of him over and over again, and calling out his name as she woke up in the middle of the night. She even risked bringing Thrawn back into the Galaxy, which ultimately happened, just so she could see Ezra again. After all that, when she finally does encounter him, her reaction seems fairly casual, as does his, as if they’ve been apart for no more than a week, rather than 10 years. Not too much happens between them afterwards either. Like I said Ezra does not appear all that curious about what happened with Sabine, how she found him, and how it was that she was now Force sensitive. Sabine likewise did not seem curious about what had happened with Ezra, and how he had gotten away from Thrawn. And with Ezra rescued and returned home, suddenly it didn’t seem as though Sabine was all that interested in him anymore, nor he all that concerned with her, though they were just as far apart as they had been at the start of the show. To be completely honest it made me wonder what the point of the whole show was. Were they just working to set up Thrawn’s return to the Galaxy? As some have said, Ezra felt like nothing more than a Macguffin in the show. Was Sabine and Ahsoka’s search for him just a plot device?
Considering how skillfully Dave Filoni had written his stories in the past, what happened in this latest project of his does not make much sense. Was he so concerned about “shipping” and so desperate to avoid it that he inadvertently “shipped” them in the other direction? Was there some sort of external pressure on him about how to write this story to have more of an appeal to “modern audiences”? Maybe some combination of those factors?
And here I’ll add that when I say “modern audiences” I don’t mean that in a contemptuous sense, though you may think I do. If there is any contempt on my part it is for those in charge of telling our stories, or those in charge of those telling our stories, who do not seem to grasp these basic truths. The truth is that audiences at their core don’t really change throughout the ages, only superficially so. Trends come and go but certain truths and ideals are eternal, and universal. How people relate to each other fundamentally does not change, whether they are friends, or more than friends. And deep down, I believe everyone (or nearly everyone at least) wants the same things. Nearly everyone at some point wants some kind of a connection with another human being, to know that they are not alone in the world, and to know that there is someone else who sees and understands things as they do. While this desire can certainly lead to abuse, and absolutely has, it is still innate to us and is not inherently wrong. Finding ways of connecting and relating to other people is one of the great challenges of life, but many would argue it is the most worthwhile of challenges. It may be the whole point of life if you think about it. As complex as it may be, many would argue it is what makes life worth living, and likewise makes for the best stories. Just as it may be the whole point of life many would say that is what most stories are about at their core: people trying to relate to one another.
Sadly, just as in real life, most stories unfortunately don’t quite get it, and the Ahsoka show in my opinion was an example of this, made all the sadder by the fact that Dave Filoni had done quite well with these characters up to that point. We may never know for certain what exactly went wrong and why, or if it can ever be “fixed” at this point, but I can’t help but feel curious. Maybe in the future Filoni will find a way to make it make sense, but I’m not sure how. And to be completely honest I don’t feel quite as enthusiastic to find out as I used to.
Also for the record I would like to add here that there are other factors that put me off from the show, such as Sabine’s Force sensitivity, that came about without much build up. But in this article I specifically wanted to focus on shipping because there seems to be so much misunderstanding around it.
I hope that I was able to clarify some, if not most of this misunderstanding, so that people could better appreciate what shipping is, where it comes from, as well as what it isn’t. Many people today are understandably sick of shipping characters, myself included. But I hope people realize that in overcompensating for something, we often come back around into the very thing that we are overcompensating for. Or sometimes, into something even worse. This may apply to nearly every facet of life, by the way, not just shipping. Finding a happy medium in how we portray our fictional relationships may help us to better understand relationships in real life, as well as how to navigate them. Neither fictional nor actual relationships can ever be perfect but they can always be better. To this understanding then I hope that I was able to give my own modest contribution, and if nothing else I hope we can connect on that.
submitted by Eli_Freeman_Author to fictionalpsychology [link] [comments]


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  3. iPhone- enable tracking in your settings - instructions here.
submitted by TightAsF_ck to beermoneyuk [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 12:59 lechugagorda Horticulture training in Ireland?

I (22,m) am planning on moving to Ireland and starting a career in horticulture in September 2024, but still don't know where (cities, regions), or exactly what to do (training, internship, job...).
I've always had a passion for nature, the outdoors and plants, and after finishing my 4 year Graphic Design course I decided I wanted to pursue a career in horticulture. This comes along with a commitment to living in the present moment, with a more natural and slow/down-to-earth lifestyle.
I’d be moving in from northern Spain, where I am from (although my mum is from Cambridge). I am also fortunate enough that my girlfriend is willing to join me on this adventure. We’re now working and saving up to move there in September, which happens to be when most courses/trainings start. I will be WWOOFing in June and July (https://wwoof.org.uk/ in case you don’t know what this is) in Cornwall and Devon, and I’m sure that will teach me a few things as well.
I originally wanted to move to England, where my mum's from, but due to how extremely difficult is for my gf to be granted a visa, we are looking into the idea of Ireland.
I love Irish music and Celtic culture, and play the fiddle and the Irish flute. I also know there's a lot of folklore in plants and landscape that I would love to learn about.
I know that the UK offers part-time courses like RHS, as well as National Trust and English Heritage apprenticeships. I imagine there are similar equivalents, but I don't really know where to start looking. Any directions or suggestions would be very appreciated.
So many options, so im a bit confused as to which route to go and would appreciate some insights from Irish folks. Looking for the training to be ideally 1 year long (but open to everything), and for it to be face-to-face and involving real experience with plants. I also have to financially support myself, so i would need to be able to work at least part time (ideally related to what i'm learning, but not necessarily).
We would also rather not live in a big city, and would prefer a medium sized arty and bohemian but rural town. I am a folk musician and love to busk, and my gf would like more seriously into pottery. We would love to be near natural parks, and to be in a region that has a strong folklore to tap into.
So, in summary, what regions do you Irish folks suggest that have either:
-Natural parks, public gardens, heritage sites… that offer internships
-Nice face-to-face horticultural training and networking possibilities (and what type of training would you suggest in this case)
-Bonus: good music scene, cultural interest, easy going character
As you can see, lots of projects going on, really pumped up. My idea is to start out as a gardener, try it out and really learn how to handle and ID plants, find out about different approaches, soil science, insects etc. Especially interested in holistic and sustainable approaches like permaculture, natural pest control, environmental restoration… I also like the idea of designing gardens (could combine that with my xp in design) or being a landscaper, but time will tell.
Thanks for reading through and sorry for a rather complicated request.
submitted by lechugagorda to GardeningIRE [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 12:47 joonv2 🔥[FREE TRIAL] Most Reviewed and Successful Coaching Server JOIN Professional PG/CLOL Challenger Coach - 3,000+ Students Affordable Prices 🔥

🔥[FREE TRIAL] Most Reviewed and Successful Coaching Server JOIN Professional PG/CLOL Challenger Coach - 3,000+ Students Affordable Prices 🔥
Hey everyone, my name is Joon and I am a GrandmasteChallenger player on the NA server. I also achieved the Master rank in 100 games on the Korean server. I currently have 5 accounts in 5 roles in MasteGM Elo and I constantly play Solo Q to keep up with meta changes (No Season 3-High Elo-washed up player coaching here 😉). I am also a CLOL collegiate coach for Ryerson University-TMU and verified both on Pro Guides (https://www.proguides.com/coach/joon) and the League Coaching subreddit.
Why Choose Me?
More than anything I am very proud of the work and progress that I have achieved with all of my students over the course of years of coaching. I would encourage you, my potential new students, to have a look at the student progress page on my server, where many of my students post frequently showing the tremendous progress that they have made since they started coaching with me (https://discord.gg/SUrJuazdBz). My approach to each student is individual and I can quickly identify your strengths and weaknesses. Unlike many other coaches, my goal is not to push you to play my playstyle or my champions but to highlight YOUR strengths in your gameplay and minimize any weaknesses you might have.
Pricing
- Each coaching session takes 1 hour and costs $30 per session.
Do you offer bundles and plans?
- Absolutely, I include a FREE 1-HOUR session for a bundle of 5 sessions. (5 Hours + 1 Free)
Is there a trial session?
- Yes, a trial session lasts around 15 minutes, in which I will review and analyze your OP.GG and watch one of your recent VODs of choice. During the trial session, I will focus on the common fundamental mistakes that you often make as well as point out some windows of opportunities that you tend to miss.
Rank Proof
Unlike many other "High Elo" coaches out there with no proof or accounts dating back to Season 6 or other prehistoric times when the game was completely different, I grind Solo Q on multiple High Elo accounts and servers constantly while reaching top GM+ ranks on every lane from top to bot on different servers (NA, EUW, KR) every season. In the last 2 seasons, I have climbed to Grandmaster + in every role. Accounts are posted on my discord for proof with screenshots and have my students added on my accounts as they tend to refer to my games for their own improvement.
Twitch stream - https://www.twitch.tv/joonvy
https://www.twitch.tv/videos/2036933477 - Example of a live coaching of a Twitch Streamer (Starts at 1 hour 50 mins into VOD)
https://preview.redd.it/f7zossa3lk0d1.png?width=1283&format=png&auto=webp&s=20e58e11f63e312aa60246417ce133cc28a75d2d
https://preview.redd.it/0n2xa2a3lk0d1.png?width=963&format=png&auto=webp&s=b8da7a4010842532e229c741a659c012429f67ab
https://preview.redd.it/dlwgw2a3lk0d1.png?width=1162&format=png&auto=webp&s=17be90a9b07768b67f456e7e84f596dd5ce784b6
What can I expect from the sessions?
  • A Session's format will depend on what you and I both believe would be a better fit for you based on your learning style (practical, theoretical, observing, etc.) and will consist of:
  • VOD Review
  • 1v1 Custom Practice (to apply the theoretical knowledge of mechanics, wave management, trading patterns, recall timers, solo kills etc.)
  • Co-Piloted Live Game
  • Champion-Specific Coaching
  • Duo game with Commentary
  • You can expect Guaranteed Improvement in every aspect of the game such as trading, jungle pathing and ganking routes, wave management, objective control, team fighting, split pushing, increasing your lead, mid and late-game macros, etc.
  • No longer will you run around the map cluelessly after the laning phase is over and question yourself on your next move, you will have ALL YOUR QUESTIONS ANSWERED.
  • Ever wondered how Smurfs can 1v9 games in your elo? You will learn how to gain and how to push your advantages like a smurf focusing on resource accumulation and keeping your in-game tempo high and close-out games early as well as how to come back from unwinnable games.
  • Your dedication to improving combined with the knowledge I can provide you will result in the growth of Divisions and even Tiers.
❗This is an example of a Full Coaching Session with me: https://www.twitch.tv/videos/1257158400
Recent Achievements:
My recent students climbed from
  • Emerald 1 to CHALLENGER NA (JG MID) in 1 year (coaching overtime)
  • Diamond 2 to Master 190 LP in 2 Sessions (MID) (Updated 300 LP)
  • Master 50 LP to 800 LP Challenger (MID)
  • Diamond 3 to Master 250 LP 3 Sessions (ADC)
  • Diamond 1 to Master 10 LP 1 Session (ADC) (Updated 200 LP)
  • Diamond 3 to Master 100 LP (JG) (Updated 300 LP)
  • Platinum 3 to Master 200 LP (Jungle, Mid, Top)
  • Gold 3 to Master 300 LP (Top Renekton, Fiora)
  • Platinum 3 to Diamond 3 in 3 sessions and 3 weeks (JG)
  • Gold 3 to Diamond 4 in 5 sessions
  • Diamond 2 to Grandmaster 480 LP in 2 sessions! (TOP Riven Updated 600 LP)
  • Platinum 1 to Diamond 1 in 3 weeks (ADC)
  • Silver 2 to Plat 3 in 3 weeks (TOP) (Updated Diamond 1!)
  • Silver 4 to Plat 4 in 1.5 months (MID)
  • Gold 4 to Plat 4 in 3 sessions (MID) (UPDATE - PLAT 2!)
  • Silver 1 to Diamond 4 in 2 months (JG)
  • Diamond 2 to Master in 5 sessions (MID)
  • Platinum 1 to Diamond 2 in 4 sessions (SUPP)
  • Gold 1 to Plat 3 in 1 Session (ADC)
  • Platinum 4 to Diamond 4 (ADC) and many more
Recent Students reaching Grandmaster from Diamond 2 and Diamond 1 from Platinum
A student reaching CHALLENGER from Emerald
All of these achievements and more you can see posted by my students in my Discord Group (https://discord.gg/SUrJuazdBz)
Availability
  • Session lasts for 1 hour and the price is $30 per session
  • COACHING ON ALL SERVERS AND TIME ZONES
  • BUNDLES for Cheaper Price Available
  • FIRST TRIAL SESSION IS FREE (15 mins)
Contact Details
My Discord is - joonvy
DISCORD SERVER: https://discord.gg/uhvrcH5yYS
Proguides Review Page: https://www.proguides.com/coach/joon
Twitch stream - https://www.twitch.tv/joonvy
VOUCH POST: https://www.reddit.com/LeagueCoaching/comments/nkx9td/vouch_post_for_joons_coaching
submitted by joonv2 to LeagueCoaching [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 12:42 bmgxoxoxo ex with a rebound that he met while we were together

hi, i'm looking for some advice as to how to get over this situation and what has happened and how i've been treated throughout it.
pretty much my ex broke up with me the day after saying he really wanted things to work for us, saying how much he cares for me, was clingy intimate with me, saying we'd never break up again etc. (see my previous post for more backstory)
i was pretty blindsided and hurt, but he's also no stranger to changing his mind just like *that*. he blocked me a week later and not even two weeks later he posted a date with a girl that he became friends with and was hanging out with while we were together.
i'm convinced there was overlap/emotional cheating considering the circumstances, even though i will never know how much exactly, i just don't understand how someone can say all those things and be intimate with you only to post someone new a week later (also something he never really did while we were together)
he had broken up with me earlier in february and we got back together early april, however i don't believe he really told any of his friends that we were back together apart from maybe one or two of his best friends. it almost feels like he did this so he had an easy out if he wanted it which i guess he took, and it's so incredibly frustrating knowing no one his holding him accountable, the new girl he's with probably doesn't even know he was intimate with me barely a week and a half before their date, and i can't say anything because it only sacrifices my image of 'being the bigger person' and just makes me look like the crazy ex girlfriend. it feels like he's just getting away with everything, and couldn't even give me any explanation or apology for any of it.
when he ended his previous relationship before me he wouldn't even hang out with me for at least 3 months because he knew the healthy thing to do was to process his previous relationship (which was only 4 months and long distance the entire time) before starting anything new, yet after breaking up with me is able to be dating someone new two weeks later (and coming into where we used to work together to brag about it to people i still work with).
anyway it's all incredibly hurtful and i don't understand how someone who said they loved me so much can do something like this with no remorse. my self esteem has really taken a hit and i find myself wondering what she has that i didn't, and why he would act like he loved me and move on in a heartbeat. i really just want to message him and ask what i did to deserve this and how long it had been going on for but i know i shouldn't give him the satisfaction of hearing from me.
the worst part of all is that i still love him despite everything and want him back very badly.
if anyone has any advice as to how to move forward from this it would be much appreciated <3
thank you in advance!

submitted by bmgxoxoxo to ExNoContact [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 12:41 vehurie [NPD] Broke all of my pen rules for this Dark Grey Pilot Decimo

[NPD] Broke all of my pen rules for this Dark Grey Pilot Decimo
I'm breaking ALL of my self-imposed fountain pen rules for this.
I've broken my: - Two-pen rule - No-buy rule - Only-use-pens-that-can-be-filled-without-disassembly-of-the-body rule (which means no cartridge converter pens, no eyedroppers, no piston fillers with blind caps, etc.)
Having once owned nearly a hundred pens, I pursued minimalism when I realised I couldn't fully enjoy them as my tastes changed. So, what did I do? I sold most and passed on the rest to a friend. Sometimes, I still think about my Sailor PGS and Pilot gold nibs, but I remind myself they're better off with my friend, as she will use them more than I can.
To persuade myself to bend my pen rules, my heart rationalised that my vintage Montblanc 146 and Tramol Vac Filler might be a tad ostentatious for daily use during lectures or at work. A Montblanc inherently draws attention, while the Tramol's demonstrator style prompts questions. Although I enjoy sharing my passion, fountain pens sometimes attract unwelcome attention. Hence, I deliberated between a Lamy 2000 and a Pilot Decimo, but I ultimately yielded to the Decimo's click mechanism as I felt that it would be more convenient for quick notes on the go.
Interestingly, I had previously owned a Vanishing Point but ended up parting with it as I found its weight, girth, clip, and abysmal ink capacity (when using the CON-40) polarising. Yet, here I am, unable to resist the allure of this Decimo; I just can't put it down! Pilot knows how to make pens that aren't just writing instruments but extensions of your hand.
Breaking every rule was worth it.
Now, I feel silly after reflecting on embracing simplicity and minimalism in my pen hobby. I fear I'll soon see fountain pens in my dreams again, and that they'll start multiplying in my life—all because of this subreddit's tantalising posts.
P.S. I've got this Decimo fitted with a fine nib and inked it up with Pilot Iroshizuku Asa-gao. This 18k nib is AMAZING. It's buttery smooth, no feedback at all; I get a hint of an architect grind. Although a Japanese fine nib wouldn't typically be my first choice, I decided that since I'll be using this as one of my EDCs, having a fine nib is nice, especially since I won't always encounter fountain pen-friendly paper on a daily basis.
submitted by vehurie to fountainpens [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 12:41 Sweet-Count2557 Free Things to Do in Pensacola Fl

Free Things to Do in Pensacola Fl
Free Things to Do in Pensacola Fl Hey there, folks! Looking for some awesome, budget-friendly activities in Pensacola, FL? Well, you're in luck! We've got you covered with a list of free things to do that'll keep you entertained and loving life.As locals who've explored every inch of this incredible city, we know all the hidden gems and secret spots that won't cost you a dime.So get ready to dive into the beauty of nature, soak up some history, and immerse yourself in the vibrant culture of Pensacola.Let's get started on this freedom-filled adventure!Key TakeawaysThere are numerous beaches and outdoor activities to enjoy in Pensacola, including Pensacola Beach, Perdido Key, Gulf Islands National Seashore, and Bay Bluffs Park.Pensacola has a rich historical and cultural heritage, with sites such as St. Michaels Cemetery, Veterans Memorial Park, Pensacola Historic District, Fort Barrancas, and Pensacola Lighthouse and Museum.Visitors can explore various museums and art galleries in Pensacola, including the National Naval Aviation Museum, Pensacola Children's Museum, Pensacola Museum of Art, and Historic Pensacola Village.There are also several events and entertainment options in Pensacola, such as Bands on the Beach, Palafox Market, and Plaza De Luna. Additionally, visitors can visit the iconic Graffiti Bridge and explore the Naval Live Oaks Reservation or take a scenic cruise on Pensacola Bay.Beaches and Outdoor ActivitiesThere are several beaches and outdoor activities in Pensacola FL that we can enjoy for free. Pensacola Beach is a popular destination with its sugar-white sand beaches and a variety of activities. We can take dolphin tours, rent boats to explore the turquoise waters, or explore the eco-trails that showcase the area's natural beauty. Perdido Key is another great option, offering stunning coastline views, a golf course, parks, and opportunities to spot wildlife. For nature lovers, Gulf Islands National Seashore is a must-visit. This beautiful area features pristine beaches, nature trails perfect for hiking, swimming spots, and excellent fishing opportunities. We can also enjoy wildlife watching and immerse ourselves in the tranquility of the surroundings. Bay Bluffs Park offers panoramic views of Escambia Bay, along with hiking trails, picnic areas, and opportunities for birdwatching. And for those who enjoy fishing or simply sightseeing, the Pensacola Beach Gulf Pier is the longest pier on the Gulf of Mexico.In addition to the beaches and outdoor activities, Pensacola also offers historical and cultural sites. St. Michaels Cemetery is one of Florida's oldest cemeteries, with historically significant grounds. Veterans Memorial Park is a peaceful area that showcases war and military monuments, including a scaled-down version of the National Vietnam Memorial. The Pensacola Historic District is a charming old town with historic buildings, and self-guided walking tours are available for those interested in learning more about the area's history. Fort Barrancas, a historic fort overlooking Pensacola Bay, offers insights into Civil War history and provides scenic views. And for those interested in maritime history, the Pensacola Lighthouse and Museum is a must-visit, offering a chance to climb the lighthouse and enjoy panoramic views of the area.These are just a few examples of the cheap and free things to do in Pensacola FL. With its beautiful beaches, outdoor activities, historical sites, and cultural attractions, Pensacola offers something for everyone, all at no cost. Whether we want to relax on the beach, explore nature trails, learn about history, or engage in outdoor adventures, Pensacola provides the perfect setting for those seeking freedom and enjoyment without breaking the bank.Historical and Cultural SitesLet's explore the historical and cultural sites in Pensacola FL that offer a glimpse into the area's rich past and vibrant heritage. Pensacola is home to a variety of sites that showcase its historical significance and cultural diversity. From cemeteries to forts, there is something for everyone to enjoy.Historical SitesCultural SitesSt. Michaels CemeteryPensacola Historic DistrictVeterans Memorial ParkPensacola Museum of ArtFort BarrancasHistoric Pensacola VillagePensacola Lighthouse and MuseumNational Naval Aviation MuseumSt. Michaels Cemetery is one of Florida's oldest cemeteries and provides a peaceful setting to reflect on the area's history. Veterans Memorial Park is a serene area where you can pay tribute to war and military heroes. Fort Barrancas offers a glimpse into the Civil War era with its historic fort and scenic views of Pensacola Bay. The Pensacola Lighthouse and Museum is a must-visit for maritime enthusiasts, offering panoramic views and fascinating exhibits.In addition to its historical sites, Pensacola also boasts a rich cultural scene. The Pensacola Historic District is a charming old town with historic buildings that can be explored through self-guided walking tours. The Pensacola Museum of Art showcases contemporary art and offers free admission on Tuesdays. Historic Pensacola Village is a living history museum that preserves buildings and offers guided tours, providing an immersive experience of the area's past.These historical and cultural sites in Pensacola FL are not only educational but also offer a sense of freedom as you explore the area's heritage at your own pace. Whether you're interested in history, art, or simply soaking up the local culture, these sites are sure to leave a lasting impression.Museums and ArtWhat museums and art exhibits can we explore for free in Pensacola Fl?Here are some options to satisfy your artistic curiosity without breaking the bank:National Naval Aviation Museum: As the largest naval aviation museum in the world, this gem is a must-visit. With its impressive collection of aircraft exhibits and interactive displays, you'll be immersed in the rich history of naval aviation.Pensacola Children's Museum: Perfect for the young and young at heart, this interactive museum offers exhibits on history, science, and art. It's a great place to engage your imagination and learn something new.Pensacola Museum of Art: If contemporary art is more your style, head to this museum. With its rotating exhibitions, you'll always find something fresh and exciting to admire. Plus, admission is free on Tuesdays, making it even more appealing.Historic Pensacola Village: Step back in time as you explore the preserved buildings and museums in this charming village. Take guided tours to learn about the city's history, and don't miss the T.T. Wentworth Jr. Florida State Museum, which showcases a wide range of artifacts.Pensacola Lighthouse and Museum: For a dose of maritime history and breathtaking views, climb to the top of this historic lighthouse. The museum also offers a fascinating look into the area's seafaring past.With these free museums and art exhibits, you can indulge your love for culture and history without spending a dime. So grab a friend or family member and embark on a journey of artistic discovery in beautiful Pensacola.Events and EntertainmentWe can find a variety of events and entertainment options in Pensacola Fl, including outdoor concerts and a bustling downtown market. One of the highlights is the Bands on the Beach, an outdoor summer concert series held at Pensacola Beach. This event features a variety of musical genres, allowing visitors to enjoy live music while taking in the beautiful beach scenery. Whether you're a fan of rock, country, or jazz, there's something for everyone at Bands on the Beach.Another popular event is the Palafox Market, located in downtown Pensacola. This vibrant market offers a wide range of goods, including fresh fruit, live plants, baked goods, and antiques. Strolling through the market, you can soak up the lively atmosphere and discover unique treasures. It's the perfect place to find a one-of-a-kind souvenir or indulge in some delicious local treats.Plaza De Luna is another must-visit spot for entertainment in Pensacola. This waterfront plaza offers a picturesque setting where you can relax and take in the beauty of the surrounding area. You might even catch a glimpse of boats sailing by or dolphins frolicking in the water. It's a great place to spend a leisurely afternoon and enjoy the freedom of the outdoors.As we move on to the next section about 'miscellaneous', there are even more exciting activities to explore in Pensacola. From the famous Graffiti Bridge, where you can contribute to the ever-changing art, to the Naval Live Oaks Reservation, offering hiking paths and nature displays, there's no shortage of adventure and freedom in this vibrant city. So, let's continue on and discover the many more free things to do in Pensacola, Fl.MiscellaneousWhile we've covered many exciting events and entertainment options in Pensacola, there are still more miscellaneous activities to explore. Here are some additional free things to do in the area:The Graffiti Bridge: A well-known sight for graffiti art, the Graffiti Bridge is a unique spot where locals and visitors can contribute their own artistic expressions. It's a vibrant and ever-changing display of creativity.Naval Live Oaks Reservation: For nature enthusiasts, the Naval Live Oaks Reservation offers hiking paths through coastal environments. You can immerse yourself in the beauty of the area, spot wildlife, and even camp overnight in the campground. Nature displays provide educational opportunities as well.Pensacola Bay Cruises: If you're interested in exploring Pensacola Bay, consider taking a scenic cruise. These cruises offer opportunities to spot dolphins, learn about the history and ecology of the area, and simply enjoy the beauty of the bay.Pensacola Museum of Industry: For those interested in the industrial history of Pensacola, the Pensacola Museum of Industry offers a fascinating look into the city's past. Exhibits showcase the various industries that have shaped the area, from shipbuilding to lumber.Pensacola Civic Band Concerts: If you enjoy live music, be sure to check out the free concerts by the Pensacola Civic Band. These concerts take place in various locations throughout the city and feature talented local musicians performing a variety of musical genres.These miscellaneous activities offer something for everyone, whether you're interested in art, nature, history, or music. So take advantage of these free opportunities and continue to explore all that Pensacola has to offer.Frequently Asked QuestionsAre There Any Free Parking Options Available at Pensacola Beach?Yes, there are free parking options available at Pensacola Beach. Visitors can find free parking at several locations along the beach, including the Casino Beach parking lot and the Santa Rosa Parking lot.However, these spots tend to fill up quickly, especially during peak times. It's always a good idea to arrive early or consider alternative transportation options, such as biking or taking the trolley, to ensure a hassle-free beach experience.Can You Bring Pets to the Gulf Islands National Seashore?Yes, you can bring pets to the Gulf Islands National Seashore. It's a great place to explore with our furry friends. The seashore offers beautiful beaches, nature trails, swimming, fishing, and wildlife watching.Imagine the joy of strolling along the coastline, feeling the sand between our toes, while our pets happily wag their tails. It's a perfect opportunity to enjoy the freedom of nature with our beloved companions.How Long Does It Take to Explore the Pensacola Historic District on a Self-Guided Walking Tour?On a self-guided walking tour, the time it takes to explore the Pensacola Historic District can vary depending on individual preferences and interests. However, it's recommended to allocate at least a couple of hours to fully appreciate the charming old town and its historic buildings.With its self-guided walking tours available, you can explore at your own pace and delve into the rich history of this district. You'll have the freedom to uncover hidden gems and take in the unique atmosphere at your leisure.Is There a Fee to Climb to the Top of the Pensacola Lighthouse?No, there's no fee to climb to the top of the Pensacola Lighthouse. It's an incredible experience that offers panoramic views of the surrounding area.The lighthouse itself is steeped in history, with its origins dating back to the 1800s.Are There Any Restrictions on Photography at the National Naval Aviation Museum?There are no restrictions on photography at the National Naval Aviation Museum. Visitors are free to capture the fascinating exhibits and aircraft displays within the museum.It's a wonderful opportunity to document your experience and preserve memories of this historic and impressive collection. So, feel free to bring your camera or smartphone and snap away!The museum offers a chance to explore and learn about naval aviation, and photography is a great way to capture the essence of this unique attraction.ConclusionIn conclusion, Pensacola, FL offers a plethora of free activities that are sure to captivate and entertain visitors of all interests.Whether you're exploring the pristine beaches and natural beauty of Gulf Islands National Seashore, delving into the city's rich history at the National Naval Aviation Museum, or immersing yourself in the vibrant arts scene at the Pensacola Museum of Art, there's something for everyone to enjoy without breaking the bank.So, come and experience the wonders of Pensacola for yourself, and create unforgettable memories without spending a dime.
submitted by Sweet-Count2557 to worldkidstravel [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 12:38 DueBag6768 New Players Experience in Dota 2.

Am enjoying the game a lot, i used to play back in the day the normal Dota in Garena so i know some of the heroes but the game isn't the same ofc.
After dota i went to League of Legends and played that for years so when i tried dota2 back then it felt laggy so i never played it.
I think most lol players will tell you the same thing, but since i haven't played lol for some time now it feels just fine.
1. Dota 2 does an amazing job of teaching the game to new players the "Learn" Tab is very good for that together with the Demo hero mode is excellent.
LoL has a testing mode too but it takes time to get in and out to test every hero and you can not create an enemy hero like you can in Dota 2 you can only have dummies.
2. I Love the "honor" system in dota2 (don't know how to call it)
you can give points to both teams and enemies even all of them if you want.
and remove points from players that you felt bad about.
Reporting isn't always the solution and looking at the graph from the system you can remove players' ability to chat if they are extremely toxic without having to ban them completely.
it is also a way for them to see that they should improve their attitude by tracking their scorer if they do not want to have their privileges removed.
3. It may be because am in just normal games right now but the community isn't very toxic in comparison to lol i have seen only one player so far asking for reports. In lol and overwatch it's almost every game.
4. the customization on the keybinds is excellent some may not realize this but it's incredible how good it is. I play many games from rts to fps,moba,mmo and arpg some of them have sh8t options.
For example, one of the heroes I like playing Meepo can alter his poof ability so you don't have to go through every hero individually to press it and u can just instead press one button.
The option to have your minion denied on your normal left click instead of (A)
You can alter every item initially how it works whether you want to be in a quick cast or not or to activate when pressing or leaving the button. I use that on some items and spells to be able to see the indicatorange of the spell/item, incredible.
5. I Like the role system with the 5 positions the game feels more free.
Lanning is important but not that detrimental and overall less oppressive.
--------
There are only 2 things in my opinion that are incredibly terrible and those are
scoreboard items and no surrender.
Items in this game are incredibly powerful and game-changing for the most time enemy heroes aren't in vision to even see what items they have
Its very weird in my opinion that i can't see the items on the scoreboard that heroes were holding at the time they were revealed on the map to be able to react with a gameplan or counter the item.
Just think about it, do i have to look at all lanes of every hero individually at what they are making at all times? It's taxing and annoying. To be honest i also have the capacity of an elephant so even if i saw the items i would forget the next second.
The no surrender option i can see being a controversial topic and something that the Dota community may not want.
But come on being stacked in a game for the extra 15-20 min it takes to finish is demoralizing, its the players option if they want to give up and surrender in the first place.
Oh yea lastly something that i don't understand completely is the different types of cc and ways to stop them but i guess i will learn that by experiencing the game more.



submitted by DueBag6768 to DotA2 [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 12:36 AnchorPointsOfficial Anchor Points: Age of Heroes Chapter 9 - Entropy

CHAPTER 9 – ENTROPY
DATE: MARCH 10th, 7 A.U. (AFTER UNIFICATION) LOCATION: SOL SYSTEM, ABOARD UTRN INDOMITABLE WILL
CAPTAIN HENRY O’TOOLE
"Ah, there you are Commander. Your message said there was something you wanted to talk with me about?" Henry asked as his executive officer approached the system map.
“Aye Captain, now's a good a time as any. As you know, the rate of disciplinary incidents has more than tripled in the last two weeks. We've had six fistfights, one near strangling, a few dozen counts of sexual harassment amongst different parties, and a few more incidents of a nature that I would rather not get into for fear of derailing the point of this conversation. I need additional resources to allocate towards ship internal security. With your permission, I'd like to borrow some of our more trusted marines to help the MA's out on their off shifts.” Commander Alvarez asked.
“Yeah, of course, take what you need to nip this in the bud. I can't say I'm entirely surprised; we expected a certain amount of this with the stresses of FTL travel. With everyone cooped up like this, maybe we should brainstorm some new outlets for the crew. Were there any specific incidents I need to get involved with?” Henry replied as he looked up from the list of updates and reports on his own console.
“No, I have it covered. It's just the regs state I need to ask permission to use marines for internal security matters.” The Commander waved it off.
“Excellent, continue to keep me in the loop then. Can I ask you a question?” Henry took the opportunity to ask something that had been bothering him.
“You just did. Hah! Just kidding, put the axe away boy! Now what would you like to know?” He said with a twinkle in his eye.
“I've seen your file, well, the parts that weren’t redacted anyway. If anything, I should be taking your orders! I mean, you're the Space Wolf! Nobody came even close to the number of ships captured or destroyed than you in the early days of the battle for the belt. Why would they want me to be captain when they had someone like you coming along the whole time? Why aren't you a captain anymore? By all right this should be your command, not mine.” Henry asked, after taking one last look around to verify they were still alone around the system map.
Commander Alvarez seemed stunned for a moment before he settled into a more pensive look.
“Listen, son, you're all full of the vigor and high passions of youth. By that I mean you've got a certain fire and aggression in you, yet I've seen you generally keep it balanced by wit and wisdom. You are a perfect match for the job, even if you could use some more real world experience. With some guidance, you'll do just fine, if you can keep strict standards for yourself and crew and a cool head when things get tough."
"I appreciate that, and I will definitely lean on your experience whenever possible. However, you didn't really answer my question... Why aren't you a captain anymore?"
"I... got a lot of damn good men and women killed in an impossible situation when we lost the Michigan-II, and I never truly got over it. No amount of medals, captured enemy ships, or the fact that I've saved many more lives than I lost can make up for that. I finally found peace with that, but that peace required that I relieve myself of any chance of future command. My legacy, for better or worse, is set in stone. Joining this expedition gives me another chance at adjusting the scales without breaking my former vows, even if the only people who will ever know it are here on the voyage with us.”
“So, you claim you have no aims or desires for leadership, but here you are a mere heartbeat away from it.” Henry said, carefully studying his executive officer's every reaction.
“My time for glory is mostly gone, yours is at your feet before you. To the world, I am retired in comfort and isolation. In reality you have me here to help make your will law. You can relax. I already turned down command of this expedition. I was plan A, why do you think they had to scramble to find you? I will take command of this mission only if you are incapable of doing so yourself, Sir. In the meantime, let my experience and whatever wisdom I can offer guide you.”
An emergency alert snapped both of their attention out of their conversation. "There's a fire in one of the officer's cabins?!" Henry’s pulse quickened as he referenced the map to find which one.
“Fuck, it started in Chantal’s room!” Henry said, horrified.
“I've got the CIC under control. Go on and get her out of there, I'll send the cavalry."
“Thank you, Commander.” Henry called back over his shoulder as he rushed for the quick lift.
The officer cabins were the in the very next deck overhead, so he was able to arrive quickly and break into a sprint. The ship shifted as it dodged some antimatter, causing Henry to slip and scramble back to his feet. As he rounded the corner he saw her door was closed and the keypad powered was off. He could hear thumps and muffled screaming from within the room.
"HANG ON CHANTAL, I'M COMING!" Henry shouted in the hope that she could hear him as he pried at the manual override panel.
Two modified Paladin exo-combat armor suits rounded the corner seconds later with a hospitalman trailing behind pushing a medical cart.
"WE'LL TAKE IT FROM HERE, SIR." A speaker-amplified voice spoke from behind him.
One of the Paladin suits accessed the manual control override and forced the door open enough for the other suit to reach in and pry it the rest of the way open as smoke plumed into the corridor. The second suit charged into the room with its flood lights on as a water cannon mounted on the right wrist sprayed flame retardant from a pack on its back. The first suit abandoned the door control and entered, emerging moments later with Chantal awake and coughing from inside the darkened door frame. She was quickly ushered into cleaner air, set gently down, wrapped in a blanket, and was quickly attended to by a hospitalman who began to check her vitals.
Relief flooded Henry’s mind as his adrenaline surge broke against the wall of worry he had built up during his mad dash from the CIC.
“Baby you came for me! I thought I was going to die in there." She pulled him into a tight embrace as she wept in cathartic release.
"Of course I did! I couldn't stand to lose you, especially not over something like this. So, what the hell happened in there?"
"Well you know me, I was all burning the midnight oil and then I smelled smoke! Then there were some sparks, the outlet pops then whoosh! My computer station and my desk are all ablaze along with half my notes, then the damned door wouldn't work! I had to drop to the floor under the smoke and pound on the door in hopes that someone would hear me. God, it was horrible... I don't think I've ever been so scared in my life." She replied with a deep shudder.
"You're safe now, it's going to be alright."
"I know, but what about my work?" She replied with a forlorn look back at her smoke damaged room.
"What about your work?"
"As you know, I lost a ton of it just now, but what’s worse is I don't even have the ability to recover them! Remember how I lost my backup drive last week? Like, I know I packed it and it is not here anywhere! It’s like some sick cosmic joke on me or something. Sorry! Gotta keep it positive, girl! I get to rethink my last few weeks’ worth of work from scratch... that was almost positive! I probably have most of this recoverable from email sent box backups. Fuck, what do you do if there's no good silver lining?” Chantal bemoaned.
Henry couldn’t help himself but laugh for a second, while his girlfriend stared at him, waiting for a response.
“I’m sorry, is this funny to you or something?”
“No, no of course not. This might be one of those times where the only silver lining is that you're alive. Plus, if anyone can remember and rebuild their notes, you can." Henry smiled down at her.
“Fine, fine, at least I am alive. I was only breathing smoke for a few seconds after all.” She said, rolling her eyes. “Thank you for rushing down here right away anyway, it means a lot. You're amazing, you know.”
Henry smiled, slightly uncomfortable for a moment, so he changed the subject.
“I do my best... Anyway, it seems like these electrical issues seem to be getting worse instead of better. Whatever patch these clowns have slapped on my ship to get her to pass inspection is clearly coming undone. What do you think is going on here?” Henry asked in mild exasperation.
“Honestly, I can’t tell you without digging into the systems myself, which I would rather avoid. My plate is full enough as it is right now, especially having to reproduce so much of my own work now. This ship has kilometers of power cables running throughout it, after all, and you have an entire loyal, capable team down there in electrical, so it should only be a matter of time before they sort it out for you. Let them do their jobs without harassing them too much, please?”
Henry felt a little irked at her for not giving him credit to know not to go overboard, but he stowed it, seeing as she ultimately was right.
“The crew has been under a lot of stress, too, between the technical issues with the lights going out, losing power to workstations, or the constant antimatter threat. More than a few people have tried to convince me to turn us around and return to S33 for a more in-depth refit and repair cycle before we try the mission again. So far, everyone has accepted the fact that we are continuing the mission without much argument, but I fear what may happen if these issues are seen as getting worse. Our orders are clear, though, we must continue the journey.” Henry said, uncomfortable with the implications, even if he didn't dare voice it.
“You should get on the Q-Comm to report the fire to S33. Maybe they will order us back to base after this.” She offered, looking for a solution to an impossible problem.
“Good idea, at least the Q-Comm is still working. It’s incredible to me those particles maintained their entanglement once we passed through the baryonic barrier. That alone has been a huge morale boost, being able to contact home base with no time lag.” Henry replied.
“It’s incredible to you because you only have a basic grasp of the science, hon. But that’s alright, very few people truly understand it. That’s in part what you have me here for anyway. Einstein called the effect spooky action from a distance; I always liked that line.”
Henry ran his fingers through his hair and looked at Chantal, with a shake of his head and a smile.
“Listen, Henry, I just had a crazy stressful experience and I need to unwind. Plus, I haven’t slept in almost a day, so I am bone tired. Let’s go to bed, huh? What do you say doc, am I clear to go?” Chantal asked.
The hospitalman closed her eyes and shook her head before responding. "Yes, you are cleared to rest, and only to rest, do you understand me?"
Chantal mouthed a thank you before she took Henry by the hand and led him off to the captain’s quarters. Henry felt no desire to fight it, nor flaw with her reasoning. Sleep sounded good, really good. Plus, he was about an hour from the start of his sleep shift anyway, and Alvarez had the CIC well covered. The lights flickered again, but Henry very purposefully ignored it.
“Hey, since we have a little time and we are both a little wound up, Why don’t we take a shower together real quick?” She said with genuine enthusiasm and a wink.
“Madam, I like the way you think.” The couple raced just a bit faster than regulations would have liked, and arrived at his door in record speed.
Inside the room they fell upon each other in great passion and need, stripping each other out of their BDU’s and underclothes. Henry tossed a giggling Chantal onto the bed, and proceeded to kiss her neck and nibble on her ear causing her to purr in anticipation before he moved down her chest, past her navel, and then eagerly began to move his kisses in between her thighs.
“Hah…. I haven’t showered. Are you sure? Oooookay! I think…. Hah…. Okay.” She said breathlessly as Henry began to work his tongue until she began to shiver and squirm before she cried out as she melted in his mouth.
“Enough, please, I can’t take it anymore! Just fuck me already!” Chantal pulled herself together enough to beg for it. Henry stood rigid and ready and set himself to granting her request, first slowly, and then with a growing intensity. She once more began to squirm as he paid close attention to her hip’s cues, knowing very well by now what she liked.
As she climaxed again, Henry lifted her from the bed and pushed her up against the wall, and then bent her over his desk for a bit before he could take it no longer and they finished together.
“Holy shit… my legs aren’t gonna work for a bit after that one. Help me up?” Chantal said in between shallow breaths.
“Yes, ma’am. It would be my pleasure.” Henry said as he helped her to her feet and into the shower, staying in longer than was strictly necessary.
Henry left the steam first, once more thankful that his cabin included its own small bathroom, rather than a communal one. Being captain had its perks, after all. He grabbed a towel and wrapped it around his waist, then handed another to Chantal who gratefully accepted it before it dropped to the ground as she stared straight past him.
“Henry!" She squeaked as she pointed past him.
"What?" Henry asked, confused.
"Henry, someone was in here!”
On their bathroom mirror, wiped from the steam were the words TURN BACK.
Henry's blood ran cold and his adrenaline spiked him into overdrive. He waved Chantal back into the shower and put his finger to his lips. She nodded then wrapped herself in her retrieved towel and dropped to the shower floor with her arms wrapped around her knees, whimpering slightly. Henry moved silently along the wall, watching the visible half of his room for any movement. He then burst round the door frame, only to find everything perfectly, precisely as they had left it. The shock of finding nothing collided with the spike of his adrenaline surge, which only fed his growing unease.
“There’s nobody here!” Henry called out after checking the closet, the only other place someone could have hidden.
“Did you lock the door?” Chantal asked, her mind already working on the mystery.
“I set the security protocol to auto lock every time it closes.”
“Paul. We need to talk to Paul.” Chantal said, squeezing her BDU’s up over her hips with a few hops. Henry pulled on his undershirt before tossing over her bra.
“Why would we want to bring that weasel into this?” Henry asked, incredulous at to how he could possibly help.
“Because he has access to the surveillance tapes, why else?”
Henry stared at Chantal, brimming with rage, trying his hardest to keep it isolated to Paul over the invasion of his privacy.
“Did you just say surveillance tapes!?!” Henry asked in an icy tone. “That does it, I’m going to strangle him.” Henry said, moving with a purpose toward the door.
“Stop. Turn around and give me a kiss. I already disabled the video cameras, at least all the ones I could find. He has audio at best, even that I doubt. What he does have that I want is the data from the motion sensor that he had installed just in case you found the more obvious bugs. Unfortunately, I sabotaged its effectiveness by blocking the sensor with dense foam, but there might be enough of something to give us a clue."
“How in the hell do you know about all of this anyway, and why the hell didn’t you tell me?!” Henry roared.
“This entire enterprise is run by an intelligence agency; how can you not have seen that one coming a mile away? I have gotten very good at catching bugs over the years. Just because I expect the invasion of privacy to be happening, doesn’t mean I have to make it easy on them. Just be happy I already took care of the issue, alright?” She replied firmly while staring him in the eyes with raised eyebrows.
“You’re incredible, I love you.” Henry blurted out before he could catch himself. Chantal beamed and tackled him to the bed sitting on his lap.
“What took you so long? Never mind, don’t answer that. I love you too, man have I wanted to say that one for a while now.”
“You know these things aren’t easy for me. I had to be sure, I also didn’t want to mess anything up. We need to be able to work together even if we had turned out to be a bad couple.” Henry admitted, Chantal made an show as she thought it over, but she then smiled and helped Henry to his feet.
“Alright, my captain. You speak great wisdom. While I have certainly felt, and thoroughly enjoyed, the depths of your passion, it is really nice to hear about it too. I do think it makes it all the better that you rule said passion with reason. It’s just one of the many things I love about you.” She said, laying her hand over his heart.
Henry took her other hand and kissed it before replying. “I think above all, I wanted to make sure that I didn’t take you for granted, nor suffer the same in reverse. A wise woman once gave me some great advice there that I have taken to heart.”
“Okay, Romeo, maybe you have a better handle on these things than you think. Now… Let’s go interrogate Paul.” Chantal had a fire in her eyes that Henry was loving very much at that moment.
“I have wanted to turn the screws on that spook for a while now.” Henry smiled as he spoke, and he opened up the connection to the ship’s intranet through his neural implant to send a message.
MEET ME IN YOUR QUARTERS IN 5 MINUTES FOR A DISCUSSION OF CRITICAL IMPORTANCE – CPT. O'TOOLE
“That ought to get him there and alone.” Henry smirked. “Let’s go.”
Together, they made their way to Paul’s equivalent-sized quarters, which he had somehow secured for himself in the ship design to help facilitate his role as the official thorn in Henry’s paw. I guess being the captain’s handler has its perks as well. Henry’s eye twitched at the corner.
After making them wait far too long, Paul opened the door and gesturing them inside. The door closed and Paul turned towards them, narrowing his eyes, studying them both.
“Is this about the fire?” Paul asked before Henry punched the weasel right in the diaphragm, forcing him to gasp for air. The look of shock on his face as he bent forwards was priceless.
“What the fuck, Henry!?” Paul managed to choke out after a minute between gasps.
“Relax, I didn’t do any permanent damage, yet.” Henry said, Paul for just a second showed actual fear in his eyes before he sneered in defiance. “Oh? That got your attention, did it? Why were you spying on me?” Henry growled.
Paul closed his eyes, dropped his head, and began to laugh before Henry grabbed him by the throat and slammed him into the wall. Foolishly, Paul even then kept laughing amidst the gasping. So Henry squeezed until Paul started slapping his arm, looking genuine fear once more growing across his face.
“Orders… I was following orders!” Paul managed to say amidst gasps and coughs.
“I thought it might be something like that. You're going to open up those files, now, and you're going to show me everything.” Henry said, dropping him to his feet at last.
“Fucking hell, Henry, I thought you of all people would have anticipated this was going to be the case. Do you think the people who made this all possible would simply let you fly around the most dangerous, advanced warship in human history without some insurance?”
“Don’t try and weasel out of your own personal culpability here. You may also want to think back to other people who were “only following orders” while performing acts they knew were wrong before you wave that line around like some get out of jail free card.” The fact that he had nothing to say spoke volumes.
“You should have told me, Paul.” Henry growled.
“That defeats the purpose! Plus, your girlfriend sabotaged them all before we ever left S33 anyway, and once more after! That type of tech doesn’t just grow on trees you know, and I don’t have an unlimited supply. You should be thanking me for covering for her and reporting back like things are normal!” Paul shouted in indignation.
“This is pointless, show me the files from around fifteen minutes ago, motion trackers, thermals, anything you have that's not blocked or sabotaged.” Henry commanded. Paul’s eyes narrowed, but after a long moment he huffed and closed his eyes.
Paul then sat down at his station and fired it up.
“Like I said, I've got practically nothing. No video, muffled audio and readings from what I assume to be a faulty motion sensor, that’s it. What are we looking for?”
“Chantal and I were, well, together. After we got out of the shower we saw that someone had written turn back in the condensation on the bathroom mirror. Only problem? My door auto locks when closed and only opens for my biometrics. That is why all of this even came up in the first place.”
“Motherfucker. That's a whole heap of bad news.” Paul said. Henry merely nodded, paying rather more attention to the screen to see if he could catch Paul in a lie about the extent of the spying.
“There’s nothing. No disturbances in the air that would even remotely resemble human movement between you two getting in the shower and you charging into your bedroom. With the noise of the shower and the distance to the microphone, there is nothing I can discern that is anomalous. You can see it all right here for yourself.”
Henry found himself even more confused and alarmed than before.
“How is that possible? Look again, run through some filters or something. There must be some evidence somewhere!”
“Alright, relax, I will get to work on this and get you a report by the end of C shift. In the meantime, you look like a mess. Get some sleep man! I can take care of it from here. Oh, and I want you to remember that I forgave you quite magnanimously for that little episode back there where you attacked me.” Henry and Chantal gave each other a look as Paul spoke.
“Wasn’t gonna apologize anyway, you had it coming. I’m going to hit the rack. I expect that report to be detailed and ready when I get up.” Henry took Chantal by the hand, and they left together, not waiting for a response.
“What a snake. Did you see him in there? Zero guilt or recognition whatsoever about spying like that. It just makes my skin crawl. Gives me bad memories.” Chantal said, turning pensive and quiet.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Henry asked, seeing that there was something clearly bothering her.
“I… had an uncle that lived with us from time to time and he would spy on me when I was dressing, try and sneak looks in the shower, stuff like that. Never touched me or anyone else that I know of, thank god, but man did it screw me up a bit still. Played havoc with my sense of security and even my sanity, never being quite sure it was real or all in my head. I wish I had said something, but I was afraid everyone would think I was overreacting or imagining it. I saw it in his eyes though, that look of... predatory lust. At least I didn't see anything like that in Paul's eyes. To this day it makes my skin crawl.”
“Good God, I can see how alone you must have felt in the middle of all that.” He squeezed her hand, she smiled up at him.
“Yeah, that was one of the hardest parts. I don’t think Paul is some raging pervert or anything, but it concerns me how normalized it was to him. Even if he isn’t being a creep with it, as if we can take his claims to be covering for me at face value. There is still no way I am going to let him have easy access to intimate videos of us, if I can possibly help it.” Chantal said before adding, “I’ll be all right, don’t worry about me. Let’s just get some sleep.”
Henry put his palm against the biometric scanner outside his room and the door slid open for them. They definitely needed some sleep after the emotional roller coaster of the past few hours, and the irresistible warm embrace of his bed called for him. The Q-Comm report could wait until he woke, he decided.
Better to have the electrical inspection ordered up, too.
I WANT A FULL REPORT AND INSPECTION PERFORMED ON THE ELECTRICAL FIRE IN CHANTAL’S ROOM BY THE START OF A SHIFT. – CAPT. O'TOOLE
Good enough. Henry thought as he sent the message. Now he could sleep. The chief could handle it from there.
MEANWHILE…
DATE : MARCH 10th, 7 A.U. LOCATION: SOL SYSTEM, ABOARD UTRN INDOMITABLE WILL
FIREMAN APPRENTICE SARAH CALLAHAN
It'll be back again tonight...
Sarah’s haunted thoughts repeated like a mantra. She had to be ready, but how? Her skin crawled and itched, the long sleeves of her BDU’s prevented her from being able to do anything about the painful sensation from the inflamed scratches they hid. She blearily rubbed at her sunken eyes, and she drained the rest of her coffee. All the numbers on the screen had started bleeding in together and her eyes hurt horribly, with the throbbing pain in her abdomen only compounding her misery.
“My god, Sarah, you look a wreck, hon. How have you been sleeping?” Yvonne, her shift partner asked, with concern in her voice.
“I have a monster tension headache, I just hope the meds kick in soon. Can you check my math? I need to get out of these white lights for a few minutes. Close my eyes for a bit, something, anything. I've been having nightmares again.” Sarah felt good, being able to admit it, and Yvonne had long since proven her friendship, so it was easier to actually speak.
“Yeah, no prob. As soon as I am done here I will check your readings and we can get out of here. Do you mean nightmares from the invasion?” Yvonne asked, carefully picking her words and tone.
“Kind of the same general themes, but different. Everything is going wrong, like the worst possible outcomes of my worst nightmares are all combining together. Like, it feels actively malicious, I don't know, its hard to explain...” Sarah said, bleakly.
“That’s hard, I am sorry. You need a shower, and an uninterrupted nap. Sleep deprivation plays all kinds of hell on the body and mind. I had a friend who went through an insomniac phase so extreme he would go days without sleeping. Wound up in the hospital after trying to drive to work while hallucinating his dead fiancée was sitting in the passenger seat screaming at him to watch out. Wound up rear-ending the car in front of him. Thank God he lived to tell the tale, but that is why it worries me to see you like this.” Yvonne planted her hand on Sarah’s shoulder as she told the story.
“Yikes, I think I slept like two hours into my sleep shift before I started having the nightmares again, woke up, and passed in and out of some restless sleep. It got really bad around oh three hundred. There were sounds... noises like scratching and a loud bang, and the shadows were moving. I just kept feeling like I was being watched, but everyone else seemed to be having disturbed sleep in their bunks. God, it was a creepy feeling.” Sarah took a moment to compose herself.
“I know how crazy this will sound, maybe that I am sleep deprived and likely hallucinating like your friend, but just hear me out. There was something there Yvonne, in the dark at the edge of perception, I could feel it. I also know I wasn’t the only one tossing and turning either. I could also hear scratchy whispering, too. I just hid, strapped in under the weighted blanket. At some point I slept some more, I must have, but not for what felt like a few stressful and draining hours. I'm just making a total mess of explaining this, aren’t I?”
“No, you're fine, girl! I am sorry that happened, my dorm has been pretty quiet, but I have always slept like a rock. Is there anything I can do?”
“I could use a hug.” Sarah said, which caused Yvonne to laugh, breaking some of the tension. They embraced warmly for a good minute, which did wonders for relieving some of the headache and her black mood.
“Thanks, Yvonne, I know it’s all in my head and it’s a vicious feedback cycle due to lack of quality sleep. Thanks for listening without calling me crazy.“ Sarah said, shying away from the last thing she hadn’t the courage to say.
She didn’t dare mention how she had hidden under the covers as she felt it get near. How she had felt something pushing on the mattress. How as her fear peaked, she herself peeked over the covers to find nothing there just to have the oppressive feeling evaporate along with the sensation of pressure by her feet. Her dorm mates all seemed to stop stirring after that, and only then did the nightmares stop for her that night. By then she was left with barely enough time for one last short sleep cycle before the start of A shift that very morning. This was a secret she would have to keep to herself, nobody would believe her anyway.
“I think I'll ask the Chief for a break from my duties today to rest and to visit med bay. Maybe they can give me something to help catch back up on my sleep.” Sarah said.
“Good idea, can I come with? I’ll back you up.” Yvonne said. Sarah smiled at her friend before she nodded at her before they checked off the last of their duties on site and headed away to find the Chief.
submitted by AnchorPointsOfficial to HFY [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 12:36 tatertotevans97 Bad executive and severance advice

This is really more of a rant/advice but mostly rant.
I support someone who is awful to work with and everyone on the team doesn’t like them and thinks that this person is bad at their job. They micromanage to the point my job becomes impossible, they purposefully put themselves in situations where makes my job more difficult. Ex. Getting upset because they are late to a client meeting (mind you the address I put down was wrong but this was a 3 minute walk from the actual location) but they always planned to show up late to this meeting because there is an email stating such even though I told them that the travel time between both locations is farther than the actual meeting.
They have had issues in the past about assistants not wanting to work with them but they are clearly important enough to the company to ignore that. My other bosses disagree wholeheartedly but there is a hierarchy there and are really frustrated by the situation.
I have been on a performance plan (which is nonsense and really just made up by HR because of her) for the last 6 months and HR was doing a bad job of staying on top of this. I was supposed to have check ins and they never reached out until I followed up with them about it.
I am leaving my department fairly soon and they offered to help me look internally after I leave the department but have given me 2 months to find an internal position where I will still be employed by the company (HR said they would give glowing recommendations for any department that reached out). After that I will receive additional pay for a short while but I won’t be an employee any longer.
I do really love my company and the entire team I work with besides this person are so great! They are the nicest group of people but it’s just this one person that is the issue. This person isn’t the highest person in the department but higher up than the other people I support.
The real question I have is, I have come to the conclusion that this is severance basically but if I find an external position outside of the company, can I start that job and still get paid by my current company? Like if I found a job while I was still technically an employee there even though I am actually doing nothing? I know my company when I first started said I can’t hold two jobs at the same time but I didn’t see anything in my final contract to leave my team that I have to sign. It does say that based on my separation date I am free to work with my employers competitors.
Any advice is really appreciated!
submitted by tatertotevans97 to ExecutiveAssistants [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 12:30 L3m0n522 2 year old - advice on healthy ways to raise emotional intellengence

I have a 2 year old girl. Shes has great communication skills and can understand most things said to her.
Shes a good girl most of the time, but as all 2 year old, she is definantly entering her 'terrible twos'. My goal is to teach her how to cope with her emotions in a healthy way. This is hard for my partner and i as we were never taught, so we are teaching ourselves as well (to clarify, we dont lose our tempers with her, although we express mad and frustration at behaviours shes done). We get her to talk about her emotions and to talk about causes for her feeling and how we can help feel better. But it does seem she is just under the developmental stage of recognising why she is feeling bad properly. We do time-outs when she is especially naughty, like deliberate hitting, then after we sit together and discuss how it made me (mum) feel, how it made her feel, what she was feeling when she did it and why, and then make up to feel happy again, and move on. The thing is, she is now okay with time-outs, doesnt seem phased by them like she use to, is happy to sit there, and gets abit giddy when its over. It feels like things dont sink in for her, and im not sure what else to do?!
We try to do more positive reinforcement rather than negative or positive punishment (psychology terms). Im in the process of trying no attention, as i know she does naughty stuff like spitting on the floor after teeth brushing, instead of the sink and saying "look mummy, i spit on the floor" for attention, but this can take time to see effect, so its been frustrating. And for some things it feels you cant ignore, like throwing dinner on the floor to rouse a reaction.
I also think im messing up on the coping skills for emotions, as when she is in meltdown, she resfuses anything suggested, i try distracting which can work sometimes, but i dont want to promote ignoring the feelings.
Please any advice would be great as i honestly have no clue how to raise an emotionally intellegent child. Im doing my best but it doesnt feel like enough.
submitted by L3m0n522 to toddlers [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 12:19 Lux_JoeStar recon-ng for 2024? recon-ng V2? Devs interested?

I want to preface this by saying lanmaster made a great tool and I am not knocking him or the tool.
I like recon-ng but I don't think it's fit for 2024 and how fast paced and automated information gathering is now. Once you go through the effort of inputting all of the API keys and some secret keys, creating your workstations etc. it's tedious to run each module.
I don't think recon-ng should just be tossed in the trash though and forgotten about because I do like it, I use recon-ng sometimes. I think it would be a shame to just let it gather dust, I don't think many people are using it in 2024 for OSINT or prep work.
I know tool devs read the subreddits and hopefully they see this, instead of starting your next project from the ground up, how about revamping this old one for the world of 2024 where we have flying cars and spider armies being sent out by the billions at the click of a button.
Give recon-ng the spiderfoot sprucing up, I would like to see recon-ng transformed instead of discarded, remove the independent module and workspace tediousness. Strip it down because it seems very compartmentalized, streamline it to work like spiderfoot does or nmap. a simple argument, and CLI command to run all modules. The API key layout and section of the tool is fine, I think that should be kept. It's nice to see the box come up in the terminal and list all of the API keys so you can see them all.
Gut the tool and remove all of the segregation and allow all modules to run with a single command, to automate the process. It's not that recon-ng lacks features, it's just the way it runs is tedious and a time sink.
Anybody up for making a V2? I will be happy to run tests to help look for bugs as you create and patch it.
submitted by Lux_JoeStar to OSINT [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 12:19 KipSudo Pixel 7pro as a complement to iPhone 13 mini for photography. Stupid?

I love my iPhone 13 mini and it's staying as my main phone, but I also love photography and would love a bit of zoom for when I go to concerts (I'm looking at you, Taylor at Wembley).
I was looking at upgrading to a 15 Pro, but then I noticed that you can pick up Pixel 7 pros for around £270 ish in the UK.... so would I be mad to buy one as a complement, to use mainly as a camera in zoomy situations?
Or is the "zoom" on a 17 pro really not that great anyway?
What I would love would be to see a shot taken on a iPhone 13 mini and then the same shot taken at full optical zoom on a 7 pro so I can get some kind of idea of the difference it would make.
I'm also not really sure how the Pixel 7 pro zoom copes with low light / concert kind of settings, so any advice or experience would be appreciated.
submitted by KipSudo to GooglePixel [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 12:18 Gixer77 Heading towards future diplomacy disasters - will the titles finally now go into abeyance?

New DM article quotes Megsy calling the semi-royal tour 'fantastic' and saying it will be the 'first of many memorable trips'. If they are planning more fake "royal" tours to countries they want to grift from, then IMO it really is time to nix those titles and for Parliament to get on with it and put them into abeyance. Things should never have got this far in the first place......the lines are now blurred with regards to these two and how other countries view them.
Charles MUST separate family from royalty and make a clear statement that these two can jaunt around the world as much as they want, but they are NOT to do it as a Duke and Duchess and certainly not to be announced at functions and receptions with their HRH titles. Why hasn't this not already been done, it just seems insane.
IMO part of the problem is Fergie - she retained her title and has used it on her books. So would it look hypocritical if they stripped the Sussex titles but never stripped Fergie's? I know that Fergie has never bad mouthed the royals and not done any faux royal tours but she still does monetize her title by having it on her books, appearing on shopping channels, weight loss products etc. The Sewer Squad will immediately bring this up if the Sussex titles were nixed.
submitted by Gixer77 to SaintMeghanMarkle [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 12:02 nguyenlinhgf 4000 wishlists in 9 months with little marketing, no Fest, here what we learned so far...

4000 wishlists in 9 months with little marketing, no Fest, here what we learned so far...
https://preview.redd.it/wm3fckaf6j0d1.png?width=1084&format=png&auto=webp&s=14e5f6896ca409f1654d19fd470f1716553b4bbb
We are a new team and this is our first game. Our Steam page went live 9 months ago and we’ve finally reached 4,000 wishlists without participating in the Next Fest. Our goal is to launch the game with 12,000+ wishlists.
Most of our team members are developers who aren’t very keen on marketing. We didn’t do anything extravagant or spend much on marketing, just used some simple tactics that I’d like to share with you.
(Our game is HERE for anyone curious, appreciate for your extra wishlist)

KEY POINTS OF ACCUMULATING WISHLISTS:

Accumulating wishlists is a marathon, not a sprint. You’ll experience high days (spikes) with hundreds of wishlists and low days with only 0-3 wishlists. We had three major spikes, each triggered by different actions:

1st Spike - Launching a Polished Steam Store Page with Demo

Steam provides a free visibility boost when you first publish your store page. To maximize this boost, we ensured our store page was professional and appealing:
  • Nice capsule art: Improves click rate when Steam recommends your game.
  • Trailer: A trailer with multiple gameplay scenes that viewers can understand in 5-10 seconds (genre, graphic style).
  • Screenshots and GIFs: At least 4-5 different gameplay images.
  • Playable demo: Available when the store page was published.

2nd Spike - Big Demo Update, Small Streamers, & Forums

Steam gives a small traffic boost when the game gets content updates. Our first demo was buggy, so we spent 3 months improving it. The release of the second demo, coupled with other marketing activities, led to our second spike:
  • PR: We spent $300 on a local gaming news article. Other gaming channels and YouTubers picked it up and gave us free coverage.
  • Streamers: A few small streamers agreed to stream our demo for free.
  • Forum Seeding: We made 3 Reddit posts (metroidvania, gaming, vietnam) and a thread on a local tech forum, gaining ~300 wishlists.

3rd Spike - Attending Online Mini Festivals

While the Steam Next Fest is crucial for indies, you can only participate once. However, there are smaller genre-specific festivals you can attend for free:
Example: Our game is a metroidvania, and participating in the “Metroidvania Fusion” festival resulted in over 1,000 wishlists.
Next Steps: We’ve signed up for the Next Fest in October and plan to have another spike before then.

TL;DR - Most Effective Marketing Activities:

  • A polished store page: Beautiful capsule art, trailer, and gameplay GIFs.
  • Regular content updates: Keep the game and store page fresh.
  • Participating in mini festivals/online events: Free exposure on Steam.

submitted by nguyenlinhgf to IndieDev [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 12:00 GreatestAiMiMain Am I (19M) being financially abused?

My mom hasn’t been in a job for over a year and since we live under the same roof I ended up having to start working instead of going to school. At the start of the year she really pressured me to give her my bank details for some reason and because I was afraid of conflict, I unfortunately caved. Fast forward to now and she always transfers more than $500 each paycheck to herself while logged in as me. This is all without my permission and I feel so small and hopeless. I can’t save for anything I want or even a place to move out because of how little money ends up being left. She even keeps my debit in her wallet so I can’t spent the money I worked my ass off to get. I don’t know what I can do and I really just needed to get this off my chest…
submitted by GreatestAiMiMain to raisedbynarcissists [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 11:53 Agreeable-Mood-235 I(25F)am pregnant with my autistic bf's(27M) baby and i don't know what to do.

So like i said in the title i found out 3 days ago that i'm pregnant about 2 weeks and since i found out about my pregnancy i'm thinking on what to do cause i'm full of doubts and fears about my and my bf (Carl) future.
Me and Carl are together since 6 years and our relationship at the beginning was extremely difficult because i didn't knew anything about autism, how to act with him, if i was pushing to hard in certain situations and all this kind of stuff. Carl's parents weren't usefull at all cause they were overprotective with him so i didn't knew what to do but then finally i realized that it would took time, patience (a lot actually hahahah) and hard work and with time i saw him changing a lot and i'm actually extremely proud of him and how much effort we both put to make pur relationship work.
Now Carl kiss me, he is not afraid of intimacy, we are holding hands, he finally looks me in the eyes (even if it's for a short time but we are working on that) and i like to think that i made him more secure about himself and his self-confidence. So yes since a year things are going great and we are both extremely happy about us and our life as a couple. We both work but he is the "breedwinner" cause he makes like 10 times more than i do and his most recent success, in his job, is to actually have his own business accounting agency. Carl is extremely good with things of numbers, profits and costs and all this kind of stuff that i'm really ignorant about and thinking that he is only 25 and now thanks to his hard work and dedication he have his own agency is just unbelievable and makes me so proud of him. (Carl is one of those "gifted" people and his ability is with numbers, calculations and all this stuff while i'm a simple secretary but i'm counting on taking a degree)
So we are both in love, money is not a problem at all, we recently bought our first house (and i hope it's our definitive one with some renovations and adjustments) so for real things are going extremely well and sincerly i would never bet on it but it's great to be wrong in this case.
So the problem comes now cause like i said i'm pregnant and first of all we always used protection. Carl is very methodic on this and he ALWAYS used protection and i ALWAYS used the pill but somehow it didn't worked and here we are. (Before anyone says it i would never cheat on my Carl)
But the thing is that i don't know what to do cause yes Carl changed a lot in this years and i'm proud of him for this but now this. A baby is a life changing thing and i'm full of doubts and fears on how he would take this, would he love the baby, how we could rise a baby with Carl, it would be difficult, how he would react on my crisis during pregnancy? So all this fears and many others are now in my mind and i don't know what to do. I didn't told him yet about my pregnancy cause i want to think wisely before doing anything.
Carl is a sweetheart, always lovely and romantic (like i "teached" him hahahah) and i'm pretty sure that our baby would grow up with no problems but what if would have some problems? How Carl would react to this? How can i be sure that everything would be fine?
So here i'm. Maybe someone that had been in my situation what's your advices? What or how should i act? Should i have this fears?
Thanks you all in advance.
TL:DR; I(25F)am pregnant with my autistic bf's(27M) baby and i don't know what to do.
submitted by Agreeable-Mood-235 to relationships [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 11:39 pimp-shrimpura alleged history of schizophrenia in family? unclear but feeling… strange lately

this might be a lot and not the place for this but someone bear with me (22m) please ;_; was talking to my family about my experiences with magic mushrooms, and my grandfather (mom’s side) said something like “be careful, my brother had a schizophrenic episode after taking lsd- we found him rambling about the molecule and he had poorly drawn out a picture of the molecule on the ground.” but i don’t think there’s ever been a conversation about him having schizophrenia? anyway then he went on to ramble about the “this is your brain on drugs”/scrambled eggs commercials that would come on tv a long time ago. and given our family histories which i will elaborate on, i feel like this is a conversation that should have happened much sooner?? or maybe he was just talking out of his ass idk lmao
mental illness seems to run in the family on both sides with alcoholism being pretty prevalent in a lot of both my mom and dad’s relatives. my dad’s brother killed himself with a gun when they were in highschool and my dad found the body. ultimately he became a pretty abusive alcoholic, and he was really prone to mood swings looking back at it. I was put in therapy after my mom divorced him but we never really talked as a family. my older sister inherited his hip deformity that made him unfit for the catholic high school his brothers all went to, and a virus that caused her to have emergency surgery at birth (which left her deaf in both ears, and she stands 4’7” at 25 years old) he picked on her and our older brother a lot, and we all struggle socially. My brother kept to himself a lot until he died at 19 in a freak car accident on a road trip with his friends. Guy with dementia snuck out and got in a car with his dog at like 2am, took an exit ramp onto the highway going the wrong way right as they took the same one, spun out and all then all lights went out, so they got rear ended by a tractor trailer. that model of jeep had a defect where the trailer hitch would break and push in to the gas tank, causing an explosion. happened a couple times prior and was actually almost recalled years before (-: trucking company policy was call your superiors before anyone else, phone records reflected that phone call did in fact happen while those kids were burning to death. i dont blame that poor driver knowing what little i know about trucking and their work conditions, and i got half of a music degree paid for by my share of the settlement. i’ve always felt like that would not have happened if these were not several upper middle class suburban families who were affected by the tragedy, who could afford to pursue legal action for years against an entity like that. I think the community rallied to donate some but even then, it was a fairly affluent community
the last time i saw my dad was at my brothers funeral. i was 14 and it had been a couple years already, but he aged so poorly much i mistook him for his dad who had died a decade prior. i don’t think we spoke until a few years later on the phone, and it was the last time we spoke. he was antagonizing my mom with his usual nonsense that she was making him out to seem like a bad guy to us, and that she was secretly in love with her cousin (who she has always been very close to) — i told him to go fuck himself — that was a reccuring taunt of his our whole childhood, which i always thought was weird but never thought much of it. eventually my brother no longer wanted to visit my mom’s extended family once he had a say in it, and he never really wanted to talk about it either. a few years after my brother died, we were visiting the cousin in question, when i woke up just in time to see them kiss. I went back to sleep like I saw nothing and my sister texted me in the morning telling me she saw the same thing.
Apart from the yknow, incest, she remarried two years before my brother died- so naturally we confronted her about it and she just sort of fawned and said she had too much to drink and that it won’t happen again. they always get too drunk together at family events and I have glimpsed kissy face emojis and other suggestive language on her phone that she obviously was trying to shield with her hands.
Now I’m questioning pretty much everything. I don’t think it was long after that when my dad went missing, which my mom only noticed because he hadn’t sent birthday cards for a whole year, and within a year of that he was found in florida, dead on the street with fentanylin his blood. he was either dosed or killed himself. My family told me he died of natural causes accelerated by his alcoholism when it first happened and didn’t mention the fentanyl until very recently. Im wondering what else could they have they lied about or just have not told me because they don’t think I need to know?
One thing I try not to think too much about is something my mom said just once when I was little, about how when my sister was born the Doctors advised them not to have more kids bc it would be risky, “but I turned out fine” or something. My dad never came to visit our family on my mom’s side that i can remember, and when I was really little we spent a lot more time with her cousin doing a lot of quality time stuff; movies, mini golf, etc. The guy also drank a lot but he’s had better luck kicking the worst of his habits I guess.
JFC what do i make of all of this
….
i also sometimes feel like i’m getting schizo-baited by all of my targeted adds and articles on all of social media and sometimes i feel like im being watched so i don’t go anywhere or talk to my friends much at all. i went to a protest the other day and saw the typical undercover cop in his “hello fellow kids” getup, next day I step out of work to go to a coffee shop and the same dude in the same outfit is sitting next to the door when i go to leave. anyway please advise
submitted by pimp-shrimpura to Psychosis [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 11:30 Unusual-Library-4173 How do I (M18) talk to my boyfriend (M18) about how he triggers my ED?

Okay, so I’m gonna try keep this short but first of all, trigger warning for eating disorder talk of course.
TLDR: My boyfriend makes small comments on weight/calories and sometimes words things in a way that I feel restricted with eating. How do I talk to him about this?
So, when I was 13 I was diagnosed with anorexia, I struggled a lot but have been in official recovery for 4 years now, and despite some little blips my relationship with food/eating has been great. However, I’ve been with my boyfriend for about 6 months and I’ve noticed a lot of the comments he makes has affected me enough to start seriously relapsing into my ED for the first time in ages.
I know he’s struggled with binge-eating in the past, but I don’t think he’s very educated on anorexia (Not that I expect him to be) but I know he wouldn’t purposely trigger me he’s just not the best with wording. He knows I’ve been struggling with food guilt etc lately since I brought it up after he noticed I wasn’t eating as much.
Examples of triggering comments - Making comments on how many steps he’s done/how many calories he’s burnt - Telling me his weight/weighing himself in-front of me randomly - Telling me to “eat something small” which I know rationally, he means “eat something, even if it’s just something small” but again, the wording of that makes me feel confined to only eating something small even if I planned a meal - The other day we sat down to do some revision together for his upcoming exam, I brought two chocolate bars and said we can have them afterwards. During his revision I realised it wouldn’t be healthy for me to “reward” myself with food, and I also knew making a deal out of me eating would make me not want to eat. So I tried to open my chocolate bar and take me a bite during revision without making a big deal about it, in which he turned around and said “No. Put it down. You can’t eat that” Obviously I know he was just sticking to the thing I set in place, so it’s not his fault AT ALL but the wording of that made my stomach drop and then even afterwards, I couldn’t bring myself to eat it.
TO BE CLEAR, I do not hold this against him. and I fully understand this is a me issue, but I need to bring it up to him, not to pick at him, but to ask him to be slightly more mindful of his wording, I just don’t know how to work that (Ironically)
submitted by Unusual-Library-4173 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]


http://rodzice.org/