Had headache on top of head now head twitching occasionally

Hey guys, something happened and I want some input on it.
I was checking the post-viva procedures (my department is overly bureaucratic) and I realized didn't know them. I know my department gives a document with all of them right after a student passes their viva. I checked my email and there's nothing there (I don't delete this kind of email). I checked with my advisor and they didn't get any document of the kind to send to me. I also checked with my friend that had their viva after and they didn't. There wasn't any information on the internet too. So, I did the logical thing and with the office that deal with this kind, but due to a strike I was advised to check with the department head, since all essential work was being done by them.
I email them and, boy, I wish I didn't after I got the response. I got the information I needed but they also said that it wasn't the department to send this kind of document, it's my advisor's job, that if I need anything else, I should talk to them. I don't feel bad about writing the email, since I wrote it in a respectful way and only did it after I saw I wouldn't get from somewhere else.
Now, I'm wondering if I should write them back to say thank you for the response and explain why I sent the email or if I should to forget about it. They sent this a few days ago, so I'm not angry at the moment, and I have a general rule to not upset people in power (it can bite you in the ass in the future). Or, maybe, I should wait until I meet them in person (it will happen eventually) and explain, since a lot of written communication can be a bit messy. So, what do you think?

Get comfy, this will a long ride. I (41f) am the middle of three daughters, ‘Shannon’ (43) and ‘Carrie’ (27) and well mom, we’ll call her ‘Brenda’.
I consider myself the quintessential “middle child”, constantly forgotten, not taken seriously and outright ignored. I got my sister’s hand-me-downs growing up, and don’t dare I ask for anything and actually get it, meanwhile, Carrie was given everything. In high school, Shannon got a tailored dress for prom, I got one off the rack. Shannon got a brand new Focus, I got a 1990 Cougar. Years later, Shannon wanted a newer car, so mom upgraded her to an Explorer. When my car fell apart at the seams, I went out and purchased an Accord. I will admit, mom did co-sign for me because I was only 19, but I was given hell for her doing so.
Shannon dropped out of college after an earthquake hit the area, then she moved in with her boyfriend at the time. I was living at home with mom, working and going to college. My paychecks every two weeks were going to mom to take care of my car note and insurance, all the while mom was paying Shannon’s car note, insurance, giving her money for bills AND Shannon had one of mom’s credit cards “for emergencies”.
While I was working and in college, I was expected to help with Carrie, who was in elementary. I would drop whatever I was doing to pick her up from school, take her to tutoring, cook dinner and help with homework. Mom was an administrative assistant for a private firm, she worked 7am-7pm. One night leaving college, I was involved in a serious accident on the way home, my car was totaled. I eventually was able to get another car from my settlement money, this time I didn’t need a co-signer. Around this same time, I was dropped from college because my grades suffered being spread so thin. I continued working full time, still giving mom money for our bills.
I eventually made the decision to enlist in the Air Force, this decision caught my entire family off guard. Most of the comments I received didn’t surprise me, most thought I wouldn’t succeed. The ones that were supportive, congratulated my decision. I prepared myself to leave home; I made an agreement with mom I would send money for my car note, with the understanding that when the time comes, I will come back for it. Well, that time came and I was met with hostility. Mom decided she wasn’t going to give my car back, it was hers, she “was making the payments”. By this time, mom had moved to Vegas with Carrie, unfortunately developed a gambling problem and I felt helpless since I was so far away.
We’ll fast forward a bit, Shannon is now living in Tennessee. I was medically discharged from the Air Force and after talks with Shannon, I went to live with her. We both worked and shared the bills, I got to reconnect with our older sister from our father’s side (we’ll call her Veronica), everything seemed great. Until… Mom called saying that my car is about to get repossessed, that helpless feeling came back. I ask mom for the information for the finance company, reach out to them, made a payment to stop the repossession, then called her back to let her know she’s caught up. Months go by, Shannon comes home early from work, only to say she was fired for a physical altercation with a coworker. Shannon goes on to say, this is the perfect time to work on her music career. I began working double shifts to cover the bills, all while Shannon is going to the studio. Mom calls one night frantic and furious, the car was repossessed and she was on the bus going to work. This causes a huge blow up between the three of us, because mom and Shannon believe I called and had the car voluntarily repossessed (I did not). Shannon bursts into my room cursing/screaming over how I wronged mom, she grabs me by a leg and drags me out of our apartment and outside into the cold. Veronica picks me up, and I go to stay with her until I got my own place. Things begin to level out, forgive and forget and I start communicating with mom again.
After some time, I found out I was pregnant with my first child and make the decision to move to Vegas with mom. During this time I get to see first hand how badly her gambling habit truly is. I would watch her cash her checks, then immediately push money in a machine and loses it in minutes, this goes on for some time. I eventually have my son and months later start working. I save up to buy myself a car, as well as save up for his first birthday party. I was so excited, planning to go all out! That is until one day I get a call at work from my aunt who lived in our building, she’s noticed my mom coming and going frantically. I didn’t have a bank account at the time, and was keeping my money in a safe hidden in my room… well she found it! When I got home, my room was disheveled and money was gone, all but a few hundred. I took what was left, found a one bed one bath for my son and I and left mom’s apartment.
Enough back story! I’ll bring you to the present! We’re now living in Vegas; I purchased a home in 2015, Carrie moved to Arizona for college, mom, Shannon, Shannon’s 3rd baby daddy (Paul) and 4 kids had a rental home across town. Last summer, they all get evicted. Yes, it was for nonpayment, yes they ALL were gamblers. I allow everyone but Paul to come stay with me, this was not well received. Shannon eventually leaves with her kids, to stay with our cousin Candace, who allowed Paul to be there too. Mom eventually is sent to live with Carrie, because we kept bumping heads. I’ll save you the guess work, Candace gets tired of them being there (rent free) and tells them to leave. Shannon blames ME for Candace putting them out, and gives me an ear full on Mother’s Day. Shannon tells me I’m a heartless b***h, she wishes we weren’t related and karma will eat me alive. I called mom to tell her what has transpired, her reaction was “why can’t we all just get along”. I lose it! She was so flippant and dismissive! No comment about Shannon living rent free in someone else’s home, or the uncalled for and hurtful words to me. So I told mom I needed some space and time, I won’t reach out to her and please don’t reach out to me, then I ended the call.
AITAH?

Max to someone "how about just talk to me." "About what." "About life." "Where... where to I start." "How about start at the beginning."
Kori to Max at the end "Do you remember the fist day we met." "Of course." "I never thought it would lead to all of this."
Max "each time humanity reaches its peak, it manages to destroy itself and its progress. Forcing the world to restart again. This cycles just continues over and over again. Meaning, humanity never achieved interstellar travel."
Describe the old man in brace yourself as black skin but white hair
"When you look down at the continents from space... you don't see borders"
In the second Antarctica chapter, in the end we think the younger girl is gonna die, but then the older sister dies
"Know thyself"
Max to kori at the end at the cliff side "you know well that I love this scenery... but I've always loved your smile even more."
Have the twins quote a bunch of great people "a great man once said..."
"Mistakes get made... but that's ok."
"I'm not questioning God work." "Yes you did... snd she disagrees."
When the old man dies in brace-yourself, one of the kids says in his funeral "he taught me that the apocalypse dosnt mean that it's the end of the world."
https://www.instagram.com/reel/C3xYxlxinmA/?igsh=bDc0Z3hmZmNmeDd5 include a part of a chapter set in the modern world hating on America with these facts
https://www.instagram.com/reel/C4eo-CzupFa/?igsh=N3E0MzhuNGs1d211 a character will say this to Max or kori. This will kinda break the 4th wall, but heavily imply each story is just like a chapter in a book. And there is still much more of the book left to go. And then at the end of the whoel thing, kori will shout out in the fight scene with tears of scarlet flames running down her face "this is all just one giant story... isn't it... I know you can feel it too. It's just a story of book that needs to end... it needs to end!" And then kori strikes at Max.
"If you can't beat them, confuse them."
Kor to Max at the end "how many scars will it take for you to relize..."
Have achapyer called century, and its 100 words long
A future where people get surgically implanted tech in their throate so they can sing in auto tune and synthetic waves
"That's why there's con in economy"
The Great Attracter will be a key thing in all books. It will slowly git hinted at what it is and its purpose in every book. Until the 5th where it is revealed in the final epic fight scene that spans across every chapter that has ever been in every book
There will be a twin of cold, and a twin of heat. The heat will be amber of amber colour
In the mortality book, any living soul that will ever lived is in there. The death world spans an infinite distance
"But it's a nice night"
"I swear you kids are gonna be the death of me." The old black guy says before ever dies. Also, one of the kid goes "don't freat. We always get out of these together."
In the end we find with rainbow girl all the other souls died, as they state "everything must come to an end... even us." But they never really say how, they only hint.
Always remember, that the world in each chapter has existed before the story, and will exist after the story
In the reality book, have a character that is slender man but with a trunk. He is found in the night ruins of a city. And he has the power to engthens his trunk to great lengths, and has amazing strength in the trunk
The alone together chapter will have Felix as at 20 something year old, and Rigby as a 12 year old
Have a chapter where someone discovers the Great Attracter
The controlled chaos chapter will jave the men wear polar bear skulls on their head. Once they become a teenager, they must take a ride of passage by killing a polar bear by themselves. And if they die, then they die, qnd they were week to begin with. But if they win, then they take the skull of that bear, and wear it around their head to mostly cover their face. They then mist never show their face to another soul from that point onwards. But if they do, then they must kill themselves.
Brace yourself chapter will have a monkey with a communicator on it so it can speak
Have a random little encounter with a kid, where someone says to a girl "I love your short hair. I haven't seen girl rock that since I was you age." "Oh, it's only that short because of the medicine." And their face dropps.
At the end of the Australian bush fire chapter, in the end the farmers cattle dog will save someone's live, but get killed in the process. So the farmer and Max make a little grave for him, and put on the grave stone. "He Something, he something, he saved a life, he was loved by all, he was a good boy, the dogs name."
"The angesadness Inside of you can not be destroyed. But instead, it can be converted into strength."
A character that says they had bad dream every single night, and then they wake up and its even worse. And sometimes they can tell when there dreaming or when there awake
A chapter is the reality book where a giant creature had shredded a giant sized shell, and is used for armer.
Kori towards the end "but what if it dosnt get better like everybody says."
Death soul with have the nick name the angle of death
The lights twins begin with the discovery that they can create artificial bending of space and time when they all use their powers together. This means that they can time travel, buy they are all stuck together in the same timeline when they do so. They create general relatively. This is what they means when they say they are stronger together. But when they first try this, they enter a random timeline, where one of the triplets is shot to a budget monk temple, and learns their philosophy on life, this soul then sticks to the philosophy for the rest of their life. But the other 2 are shot out randomly across the earth. They eventually find one another, and they try time travel two more times, each time the other triplet is shot into a monk temple and monism in China. They then keep this philosophy for the rest of their lives.
A future with an elephant that has a golden tusk
https://youtube.com/shorts/rv4jjss-XkY?si=7-24vqTZuvAQCN7V
A twin "the universe is both beautiful and terrifying at the same time."
In the mortality book, a chapter about hawing night matchers. Based off a real thing, when you make eye contact with them you get whisked away to the underworld. This one will be similar to Dream Time, where a couple of kids are messing around and one of them is trying to find one and get whisked away. But they get whisked away to the land of the dead, and they witness this new world with the dead twin. But then they really want to go back, but the dead twin assure the kid that there is no way home. This kid does this either because they just want to experience it, or they need to go there to see a loved one
The very last thing kori will say to Max will be "Godspeed." Before she let's go of Max, and allows herself to get sucked into the black hole
In reality book, we meet the cheif of a clan, who has a wife who is an equally skilled warrior. But this man has a wide frame, big muscles, and even greater wings. This man has a Viking type name, as does the rest of his family. His son who is around 14 has dark hair, and is a very responsible and respectful child. He is disaplined, and only says "Father" not "dad". Halfway through we get a 1 on 1 with a twin and him, where he mentions that one day, father says ill be chief of the clan, and will get to lead the warriors unto battle. In the end fight scene, all the troops await with their bare chests and war paint across their bodies and face, the son is apparently of this. At some point during the middle when we first meet the bad guy, he has a good guy held captive who is bleeding badly. And he interigates him for information. But in the end, he says nothing. Because of this, he rips his wings off. Blood falls out. But he dosnt kill him, instead he sends him back home as a message. The bad guys motivation goes back into family Ancestoral claim to something.
The twins relize that they can make anyone immortal
A young girl talking to someone about the failed birth of her sister: "the day of my sisters birth, papa were yelling, and mama was screaming. But when everyone expected my baby sister to start screaming... She didn't. She stayed silent... she didn't make a noise... and she didn't move a muscle. They tried to rub on her little body, I think thwy tries to warm her up. But in the end, mama said that due to some complications, I never got to meet my baby sister. But mama said it's ok to cry, because she had now gone to a better place. But I don't know where she went." This chapter is small, but starts of with one of the twins with a small girl, and they adventure up a mountain, and when they reach the peak they sit and admire the veiw, but this is when the girl tells them the story. And she says that they try to look from her by going on an adventure every single day to try and find her. And she goes to a new place every day.
During the fight "we can both just go home!" "We have no home!"
Make the factor that in the future they begin to loose recipes because the girls of the day are not learning how to cook from mum
"Society can only handle one change at time."
In the reality book, include chapters of Teh Stupendium songs. Like a chapter about
"Falklands law. When you don't have to make a decision... then don't make a decision."
A chapter in the reality book of a a world of people that are half made of trees, and human made out of normal human stuff. These people have powers the control plants and what not. There hair is half hair, half leaves. Have a girl with long brown hair, half long brown leaves. They live in trees and are spiritual to all life
In the reality book, have a 3 chapter story about mutants, like in x men
A character name will be calcifer
A chapter about a water war
In one of the farm chapters, express the importance of season. But in another chapter a character will say only summer and winter really matter, and even then I barely notice. And in the Antarctica chapter say has its only ever winter.
In the reality book include a chapter with a world that is made of old fashion toys. (Like toy box by Stupendium) but throughout the story, there is an eerie and scary atmosphere. But then towards the end right before the fight when the boy twin is losing his mind he will turn a person into a stuffed child's toys, similar to the ones in this toyworld. And then people will get scared of him and run away, but then he turns them all into teddies.
In the mortality book have a chapter in ancient Egypt about a dynasty that will die will Cleopatra, the title will be dynasty. It will be about the Egyptians going into the next world
Max at the end "you are my best friend kori!... you are my sister!... and you are my twin soul!..."
In reality book, there is a chapter with a peacock with its tail feathers of different elements. Part is fire, ice, rock, leafs, water Plasma.
Max in the end learns acceptance of life, but kori is the opposite
Really lean into the time difference in chapters
Really lean into the contrast of personality with the twins at the start
Kori in the end says that "in my existence, I've asked many question about myself... but the one I've never been stuck on is who am I?"
"There are countless questions about the universe, and most of them will never be answered... But that's ok. Not everything in life makes sense, and that's ok."
"I have failed you Kori... I have failed you."
"I mean, you don't have to do anything, really... except die of course."
Have a character cry blood
"Life... it seems like an ordinary adventure... but it is part of something much grander."
In the reality book "how is this war if we both fall!?!"
In the reality book have a chapter with a big and tall tree the size of a skyscraper. But there are streaks of openings in the side of the tree, and the trunk of the whole trunk is hollow. Meaning, during any wind, is let's out a unique whistle as the air currents runs through the slithered in the opening. This has a spiral stair case in it and the cracks let in light.
A book series that is a novella and each chapter is a different perspective on an event, and they are all very different.
A chapter, probably in the reality book, where a French girl wearing a baray meets a Spanish boy wearing a sunbrero. They have to go on adventure together but can't understand one another. But that hardly makes a difference for these kids. Until then end when they get into a fight and someone dies.
A chapter that has a twin shows a pleb another world when they meet a friend that soon turns into a love interest. But they learn that they can never be together in the same world
"Your like a pirate without a ship or crew."
A short chapter with a moon eclipse but the moon is half inhabited so it look weird
A chapter in the dream book where someone dosnt want to sell their house because they have lived their whole life in it. In their dream they see their house alone in a black void. They see an endless amount of for sale signs around it. They land on the front lawn, but when they enter, they become a child, like back when they were a kid running through the house. This chapter is about accepting change.
"Once you taste it. You'll never forget."
Make a chapter about the jedi character that is so in tune with the force, they don't need a light saber. But they are so connected with natural life that can sense everything. They are connected either the living force.
The dream twins can turn into anything when in a dream, but can't in reality
In the very final chapter, max makes the letter K out of sticks and makes it as a grave stone type of thing with stone circling in and what not.
Really hammer in the notion that everything must come to an end
Cory asks max what's the greatest piece of advice you could every give me, and Max says "through life you are going to make mistakes. It is going to happen, no matter who you are, and how hard you try, either you or the people around you are going to make mistakes. But when you make these mistakes, there are two things you can do. You can either regret them. Or, you can learn from them."
Twins will say. "A great man once said. And then insert a good famous quote
https://www.reddit.com/ATLA/s/Xf8TbZsARn
Re-name Adam (from the founder) to Nathan. In future monarch stories, say how the founder of the citadel was sir Nathanial.
In three kori car crash chapter. Kori makes remark that she can't get drunk. Meaning she is sober during this chapter. And she tells this to Max, no matter how hard I try, I can't ever get drunk
The reality twins will turn people in clouds, that will fade away into a mist
Do a chapter about the 7 wonders of the world, which one was the greatest or would last the longest.
When someone dies, use "its okay... you can finally rest now."
Right at the end, max to kori "You are everything to, Kori!.. you are my best friend... you are my sister... you are my spouse... you are my twin soul... I love you!"
https://youtube.com/shorts/FuRLaLFNX8o?si=SwMbAq-Ia6OaKNHz

so I (19F) had a guy best friend (18M) for a year and a couple of months. we met online through a mutual friend and i happened to know his older sister. we got so close in a sgort amount of time and he helped me a lot when my best friends of 6 years left me for their new friend group. i even trusted him enough to tell him that im bisexual which made him come out to me as gay (we live in a very religious country so it's so risky to cime out). i became friends with his older and younger sister. his friends knew me and his cousins as well. some people mistook us for being a couple but we only saw each other as siblings. he's a people pleaser and he's always in the middle no matter what around this time last year he became friends with a girl and i thought she's cool so he introduced me to her. we talked every now and then and she was just so funny and cool and i thought that im finally making a close irl girl friend. after a while she started leaving me on seen or delivered while posting stories, she even ignored my attempts to make her notice me by liking her story or participating in the 'ask me' box. i tild my guy bsf about this to know if she's upset with me and he said it's nothing she's just like that with everyone else. i ignored it but then my guy bsf disappeared due to family issues and she only reached out to ask about him and why he's not responding to her. she literally ignored the texts i sent previously abd didn't even apologize for leaving me on seen FOR A MONTH. before he disappeared he told me he would disappear and told not to tell anyone anything and just say i don't know. so i told her i didn't know what happened to him and tried to make a small talk but she left me on delivered. i told my guy bsf about this and i was so upset because i didn't understand why would she do that. he said he didn't understand why would she do that so i told him that im not blocking her just because she's his friend. 2 months ago she deleted her acc and made a new one with him, his sisters and our mutual friends added there. she told everyone about the account except for me and i got so upset about this and told my guy bsf about this and demanded some answers. he said it's nothing personal against me and tried to defend her and we had a long argument, i tried to male him understand my point of view but he just couldn't see where the disrespect is so i told him that i had enough and i won't be replying to any of his messages until after our exams. well a week later i made my decision to cut him off so i did. i sent him a long paragraph of how hurt i was that he's not taking my side and he's ditching me over someone he doesn't even trust enough to tell that he's gay (he didn't come out to her) and that he's doing exactly what my ex besties did to me i didn't feel bad aftee blocking him, it's been a month but it's starting to get to my head that probably i overrated? i don't think i did but i don't know

I started taking it a week ago tomorrow. The second day I had a raging headache but attributed it to lack of caffeine. Then another one a couple days later. Now here I am with an awful headache in the front and sides of my head. Doctor told me to continue it even thought he believes I passed it. I'm just wondering if anyone is experiencing this side effect?

“…. Hmm….” The thing ponders the sight before him. A world in flame, icons of chaos destroyed and their followers laying dead before them. The souls of the damned cling to the earth, their whispers hanging in the wind. He can hear them, all of them, and he listens to them all, taking in their hatred into his own being. He can feel his power grow ever so slightly with their hatred, and it serves to bolster his own, forging it into a weapon to use against Them.
“My Lord…” A voice sounds behind him, he turns to see a Astartes, his armor half black and half white, with horns adorning his armor. He wields a power axe in one hand and the other is encased within a power fist.
“…. Speak Asher.” The thing says, turning to look at the Astartes. The thing stands about ten feet tall, his body covered in what looks like fur, but upon a closer look appears to be a mass of countless individual tendrils. He has a massive tail with a gaping maw of teeth at the end, and his face was an elongated skull-like visage, with four hours adorning it.
“We have gathered up the individuals you requested, the sorcerer and his retinue.” Asher said, brushing some ash off his shoulder. “Zion was injured but other then that there were no casualties, they were already quite injured from our initial bombardment on this planet, our Librarians are keeping the sorcerer in check at the moment.”
The thing gave a nod to Asher, his face unemotive. They walked into the ruined Chaos fortress, the iconography of the ruinous powers lay defiled and defaced throughout the fortress, and symbols of a half black half white skull now stood in their place. When the thing and Asher made their way to the dungeons, the Chaos sorcerer was being held down by two librarians using psychic chains, his red armor and hooded helm shaking in pain. “You may stop. Leave us.” Without a word, the librarians dismiss their psychic chains and leave with Asher, leaving just the Sorcerer and the thing in the cold stone room. “…. So, how’ve you been?” The thing asked, just as a blast of warp fire was shot into his face by the sorcerer.
“You blasphemous fool! Who do you think you are?! Do you know who I am?!! I-“ the sorcerer is interrupted by the thing gripping the hand casting the warp fire, his mind barely having time to register the movement before the pain of his arm being torn from his body sears through his body. The sorcerer yells in agony, as the thing stands before him, the last of the warp fire wisping away from his unharmed head.
“I see you are still impulsive as always Serviel…” the sorcerer almost froze at the mention of his name, and in the voice of the thing before him he felt a twinge of familiarity. “It’s why you lost your arm that one time, you told me it was from a duel with an ork, but every knew you got hit by a rocket. Looks like you got that arm thing fixed though…” The thing dangles the arm he just tore off, tendrils sticking out from the stub and wiggling around, trying to find its host. He tosses the arm onto the ground and snaps his finger, igniting the arm in black flames, burning the thing into ash as it slowly dies. “… Now, I have a question for you Serviel…”
“Y-You… who are-“ the tail of the thing slams into Serviel, collapsing one of his three lungs and making him cough up blood.
“You’ll get your chance to speak, for now, shut up and answer me…” the Thing’s tail opens it’s maw and picks up Serviel, sitting him upright as the Thing gets up close to Serviel’s face, looking him in the eyes. “Where is Vashtorr heading?”
Serviel looked surprised, like he expected maybe something else to be asked, but he grit his teeth through the pain and answered, “Ghh! I… I don’t know… we were sent here to gather resources for the Wyrmwood… we… we weren’t told anything else….”
The Thing lets out a growl of frustration, another dead end. Either he isn’t acting on leads fast enough or Vashtorr is actively messing with him. As he thinks about his next steps, Serviel looks at him questioningly. The Thing notices and looks at him. “… Well? Out with it.”
“… So you’re alive…” Serviel says, and the Thing just shrugs.
“Sort of.” He says, putting a hand around the nape of Serviel’s neck. He has had this conversation many times, this is the part where they insult him and belittle him. He used to pull them apart slowly and painfully before but he just wanted to kill him quickly and be done with it.
“You… you know she’s still looking for you…” Those words make the Thing stop for a moment, his hands loosening slightly around Serviel’s neck. The memories of her are still bright in his mind, her voice was that of an angel’s, her beauty was nothing but serine, and her kindness knew no bounds…. That’s how it was long ago, the woman she was is now long gone….
“… Yea… I know she is…” the Thing breaks Serviel’s neck with a flick of his wrist, too fast for Serviel to have felt it. He drinks in his soul, absorbing it into his being, where the ruinous powers will have hold of him no more… The Thing leaves the dungeon and makes it to the command room of the fortress, where Asher and his second in command wait for him. “Asher. Argal.” The Thing says, addressing them both. “This planet is ours now, I can assume you’ve already pacified the local populace?”
Argal Tal steps up to the Thing, he is more mutated than most of his brothers but other than that he wears untainted armor custom made to fit his bulkier form, and he stands almost eight feet tall, with every bit of the nobility he had during the great crusade. “It is done my lord, we have successfully convinced them we are servants of the emperor, the indoctrination plans are already in place, we suspect within a few generations this planet will be devoted entirely to you.”
“On top of all that…” Asher says, “We have collected any and all equipment usable to us. Our ammo stockpiles are at maximum capacity, as are most of our other requirements.”
The Thing looks at Asher, nodding in approval. “Good. Even if we aren’t any closer to Vashtorr, we are at least better off now than before.”
“No luck with the sorcerer then, eh my lord?” Asher ask, his voice unsurprised.
“Nope.” The Thing says flatly, slightly annoyed by Asher’s tone but knows he’s just being the sarcastic individual that he is. “Now, leave me. Take care of what needs taking care of out there…” He orders as he steps out onto the balcony of the command room, the sound of ceremite armor clinking and then stomping off soon growing distant and leaving only silence. A few minutes of this pass by, the Thing thinking back too a time before all this madness. A time when humanity was on the upswing, when things like daemons and the gods were the furthest things from the people’s mind, a time when… when he had her.“….. Still here Argal?” He says, aware that Argal Tal hasn’t left the room.
“…. Your thinking about Mother again, aren’t you?” Argal ask, and the twitch from the Thing’s shoulders tells him he’s right. “…. We will save her Little Light, we will free her from the forces that have broken her.” Argal says, walking up next to the Thing he called Little Light, a title of endearment that his Gene-Mother gave to him. “And you are the key to that, you are the reason why I am here and able to aid you in this mission… all of us, we are your sons now, and we stand with you.”
“… I know… I know…” Little Light says, appreciating Argal Tal’s faith in him and his goals. “… We have much to do, and I fear time may be running out… make sure your brothers are ready for when the time comes for us to move…”
Argal Tal bows, “It will be done… Lord Malal….”

TLDR: I spend every moment wishing I was a girl yet I still try to find a reason to deny this feeling, to invalidate myself. Am I the only one?
I'm in my early 20's and have lately been pondering HEAVILY that I might be trans. Now this is the first example. Saying I MIGHT be trans feels wrong, because I know I want to be a woman. Yet I keep on trying to find any reason that would disprove that wish of mine. I say stuff like "oh it wasn't a problem before but now suddenly I don't like being a guy?" Or "I can survive people gendering me as a man" even though I know I am uncomfortable with it. But this small little things make me feel like a fraud. Am I trans? I didn't have any "signs" as far as I can tell. Sure I had some, but people would argue that those are just regular things children do to experiment.
I hate my current body, been hating it with a burning passion for quite a few months now. A.M.'s monologue would suffice to translate my feelings. And I am very much thinking about sh or worse. Altough those thoughts are slowly turning into "I will stelath hrt myself and move away to a country where it is okay ro be trans, and just cut my transphobe side of the family."
I have a few very good friends who probably don't even know how much they are helping me with just being there for me to vent, but I don't want to always nag them and make them feel trapped since theg can't actually help me turn into a girl woth some magic.
I guess my question is, am I trans? Should I give in to the thoughts of "running away" and transitioning. A lot of these questions remain unanswered in my head because of family and stuff. I KNOW I want to be a girl, and still I feel like an imposter. Like I'm making it up.
Sorry this actually turned into a bit of rant, more then anything.

Morning all (or afternoon, evening, take your pick), I've been a problem substance abuser for twenty three years now, starting at 16. Luckily nothing too heavy, initially weed, I was never a gifted smoker and could never hold down a job, looked like shit and didn't care, slept all day and all night, tons of debt, shitty friends, missed out on hundreds, maybe thousands of amazing experiences because I wanted to stay home and get high. In 2008 I broke out of that, got a job in teaching and have been essentially a functioning alcoholic ever since. It's like my whole life I've always just been bad at being clear headed and straight, never content to just sit there without something getting me wrecked. Teaching is full of drinkers, I love rock, punk, metal, clubs, festivals, all full of drinkers. I am currently travelling around various spots in Asia (Vietnam - Malaysia - Japan - Thailand - currently Taiwan), working online and living the dream. Full of drinkers. I have also been a liability on a number of occasions. Drinking until 4am, blacking out, waking up somewhere where I don't know where I am. I dont piss myself but I do lose a lot of hats and cigarettes. Last Saturday morning I woke up on a bench, made it about 200m down the street then passed out on another bench, threw up under it then finally got my shit together and stumbled home. This was at about 7am in a big city in Taiwan. Families, kids going to Saturday school, elderly people exercising, everyone going about their day. And me, a 6ft3in white male barfing and sleeping in the middle of a park next to a busy subway station. It's fucking pathetic and I hate myself for it. I'm too old and too tired and my body is too beaten up to keep on doing this. But, booze is everywhere, and no matter how bad it gets I always convince myself of the same old cycle - quit completely for a little while - pat myself on the back for being a good boy - convince myself I can drink in moderation - drink in moderation for a little while - get a true taste for it - lose a whole weekend and wake up Monday feeling like hell - Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, sober and working but filled with existential dread and suicidal ideation. I'm going back to the UK in a few weeks. Even if I manage to quit for a while here, when I'm back home I will be surrounded at all time by fellow drinkers, heavy drinkers, and various sniffables and smokables and the ten months I've spent getting my head together, avoiding everything other than booze, will all go out of the window and I'll be waking up at 6am on Monday for work after 4 hours sleep all weekend with a nose clogged with blood and regret and that specific kind of headache that only valium and more booze can come close to shifting. It's fucking depressing knowing this is how weak I am. Anyway, no real point or request, just haven't put this into words for anyone else to read. I've written loads in my diary but I'm already anxious that if I die suddenly and my mother reads it she will then also die, but of secondhand shame. I'm not particularly addicted to alcohol, I only drink beer and occasionally shots, I can go days and sometimes weeks without really missing it, if the time and place is right. I'm addicted to parties and late nights and chatting shit and singing and dancing. Which is a shame because they all lose some of their appeal when you're on the soft drinks. I mean, they don't, it's all about perception. How do you cope, those that have broken free? What're your stories? I feel like this cycle is similar for everyone that knows they have a problem. Thank you for reading x

I have a toothache on the right side that needs a root canal. I'm waiting for my state insurance to approve the procedure. The only thing is that I don't necessarily feel pain on my tooth. It's more like soreness. It goes my from neck, to my jaw, and all the way to my cheek, right below my eye. I took 400mg ibuprofen in the morning and it helped for most of the day, but now that feeling is coming back. I tried to research if it was normal and I found some reddit threads and like two people mentioned they knew someone that died from a toothache. I've had a root canal before, and I was in excruciating pain before that, possibly worse than what I'm currently going through. I just think I'm letting it get to my head.
I fucked up and had a really sweet muffin yesterday and I think that's what aggravated the feeling I have today. I had a weird sensation and I started feeling disoriented but I think I was freaking myself out. I'm going to call my dentist tomorrow because he offered to take the nerve out in the meantime if it was making me uncomfortable. I declined at first because I had PTSD from a previously botched root canal but now I'm wonder if I should've just made the appointment when I had the chance. Last time they put me on amoxicillin before the procedure but this time they didn't. Surely that means the infection isn't that bad right?
Doesn't help that I'm getting chest pain but I think that's my heart burn because I ate spicy food yesterday and my anxiety has been through the roof for the last month. Anyone experience something similar and was okay in the end? I'm okay with even losing the tooth at this point. I'd rather not, but I'm just too scared of the infection spreading elsewhere. Please provide some support.

The dissociation and depersonalization are really bad. It’s been getting worse and worse. I can’t stop myself from floating away. Sometimes I have to hold onto things and feel them and tell myself I’m still here. I don’t remember what happens throughout the day. When people are talking to me it takes everything to focus on the words to remember what they say. Sometimes I have to repeat them to make sure I got it
I was hypomanic for about a week and everything was extremely intense and a little dysphoric but now I don’t know what’s happening. It’s like a flip switched
This morning I was feeling okay and then got super angry and irritable. Then my mood started feeling really really low and I started crying. My thoughts took me to dark places and suicide. Everything felt so intense I just wanted to escape. I couldn’t stop self harming
But I had to go to work
I couldn’t make it through the day and had to leave early. My manager said that since this has been happening a lot maybe it would be a good idea to take a leave of absence
Everything feels so weird and off in my head. It’s like I’m not there. I feel like an alien
All day I’ve been feeling really overwhelmed And I ended up having a panic attack at work. I had one last night too. It feels like things keep building and building
I feel so stuck. Stuck in my head, stuck in a really depressed mood and stuck in one position staring out the window
I wish I wasn’t alone. I’m scared of my thoughts. I don’t know what to do

My wife and I have been married 8 years this year. Now when we first got together I was head over heels for her. As life went on not much changed but slowly fell out of that “honeymoon” stage. We’ve had our ups and downs just like every relationship and works through them for the most part. We have had several miscarriages once we began to try for kids and that really took a toll on our relationship. We have had several conversations about “what I want in this relationship” and my response was I literally don’t know. We have a 2 yr old they she is more or less a stay at home mom since she works from home and works maybe 5-10hrs a week. I myself am generally working 70-80 hrs a week and I get home and am exhausted. Come home and take a long shower to wind down a little. Most days I will stay upstairs til my daughter goes to bed than I normally go down and game for a few hours just to zone out from the day more or less. Now I do love my wife but it’s more of a love because she’s the mother of our daughter, I don’t particularly feel like I’m “in love” with her. I’ve been trying to just make it work the last couple years for my daughter’s sake because I grew up with divorced parents and it wasn’t always the best. But I feel like we are constantly arguing about something or another and I feel like it would be better for my daughter to have separate households that are both happy rather than one household that’s like walking on pins and needles. I know my wife loves me more than life itself but i just don’t have the same feelings anymore. Now, counseling? I know she has done some herself a few years back and didn’t seem to make a difference. I won’t do counseling for the fact of I was forced to do it when I was a kid and hated every part of it. Plus I don’t have the time nor the energy to do that. Now I’m sure I’ve left some details out but I just wanna get everyone’s opinion on what you think I should do. If it is divorce idk how I’m going to break it to her. I just feel like I’m drifting further away from her, I just took a month long hunting trip and missed my daughter everyday but to be perfectly honest there wasn’t very many times I thought about missing my wife.

and i mean it literally makes me angry. just now i paced around my room while silently screaming and losing my shit because i had ONE calorie left to close my activity ring on my fitness app and the number wouldnt fucking update. it finally did and now my head hurts from how pissed off i got, it’s ridiculous. i get mad when someone comes home when i’m about to purge. i get mad when someone eats something i was silently planning on rationing out for myself. i get mad when someone walks into the kitchen when im getting food. and i don’t talk about any of my feelings to anyone so i have so much pent up rage inside of me that anyone even speaking in my vicinity makes me so mad i could explode. i go on walks with my mom and whenever she talks i just want to say “you know the great thing about walking is YOU DONT HAVE TO FUCKING TALK”. i physically can’t chill out i’m losing my mind. i’m not even pmsing bro this level of rage is seriously demented😭😭😭 kill me

Previous
Chapter 1
"You imbeciles!" Fytistone shouted at the group.
"But Fy.." The woman standing before Fytistone began.
"No! You idiots abducted an Orc and brought him here!" Fytistone shouted.
"Her..." Derrick began.
"I don't care!" Fytistone screamed at the man, who recoiled from her anger. "They will look here first."
"Who would dare come here?" A man asked, "You are a pillar of this community."
Fytistone took a deep breath, "Yes, I am. But that Orc-loving mayor will come here first."
"Mayor Hamilton loves Orcs?" Derrick asked, "I didn't know that. I wonder if he and the imp are fighting over the Orc?"
Fytistone blinked a few times, "Shut up, Derrick. I don't want to know what nonsense you are spewing." Derrick looked down and mumbled something. Fytistone addressed the remaining humans in the room, "How long until he wakes up?"
"She," Said another man.
Fytistone sneered, "How long until it wakes up?"
"The spell should last twenty-four hours or so." The woman said.
"Fine, wait until tomorrow morning and get it out of here," Fytistone demanded. "I don't want it waking up or Hammy nosing around here. Understood?" The humans nodded.
A human male in the back raised his hand, "Uh, hi, uh, why not sneak her, I mean, it out tonight?"
"Because the guards will notice a single wagon and may want to inspect it. When there's more traffic tomorrow, they'll let you through without looking." Fytistone spoke slowly like she was speaking to a child. "The night guards are far more vigilant than the day guards."
"Ain't that the truth," a man said to the other woman in the room, "Your cousin didn't even look up as we brought her here."
—
"Good morning," Thorn said as she entered the big tent. Everyone had gathered for breakfast. The chatting stopped as Thorn sat down with her bacon, eggs, and coffee.
"Rose is missing!" Rick shouted as he ran into the tent.
"What?" Richard and Bob shouted.
"She didn't come back last night," Rick said, "I've looked all over for her."
Thorn looked at the panicking imp, "She's fine, imp. Maybe she needed some more time."
"Why didn't you say something last night?" Richard asked, ignoring Thorn.
"I, uh," the imp looked down, "I thought maybe she didn't want to see me yet." Rick kicked the ground, "Maybe Thorn was right."
"She's wrong," Ben and Betty said together. Thorn glared at them, and they glared back.
"Ben and Betty are right. She would have come back," Bob said, "She wouldn't have abandoned you." He gave Thorn a nasty look, "No matter who thought of what."
Richard rose from the table. "We need to search for her. I'll get a party together. Bob, you stay here with twins and run the restaurant."
"I'm going," Rick said, "I can smell where she has been."
Thorn looked at the little imp, "You can smell her? I can't believe that. Too many creatures have been through here."
"No, no, I can," Rick said, "She smells of flowers and rain. Everyone has a smell."
"What do I smell like, Rick," Bob asked.
"Gold and dirt," Rick said bluntly.
"Yeah, that tracks." Bob laughed.
The twins looked at each other, "What about us?" They asked.
"You smell of fire, wood, and hope," the twins nodded. “Great Orc Richard smells of sorrow and fallen leaves in autumn," Richard frowned and nodded. “Thorn smells like…" The imp's eyes widened, and he looked away.
"What do I smell like, Imp?" Thorn growled.
"Death." The imp whispered.
Thorn rose from her seat and stared down at the embarrassed imp, "You have a good nose, little one. And you spoke the truth." Thorn looked at Richard, "The imp and I will find Rose. I'm sure she's fine. Probably fell asleep under a tree."
The Orcs looked at each other, and finally, Richard said, "Okay, for now. But if she's in trouble, we'll come help."
Thorn laughed raspily, "No, death stalks the plains today." She turned and left the tent with the little imp running after her.
"I pray to all the gods that nothing has happened to Rose," Richard said. "For her sake and anyone stupid enough to cross those two."
Bob sighed, "Who's going to do the most property damage? Rick or Thorn?"
"Yes," Richard said as he went back to his breakfast.
–
Shaman Thorn and the Imp Rick stalked the camp. Everyone, Orcs, humans, imps, trolls, and giants, stayed out of the way. Soon, they found themselves on the road. Rick's nose was close to the ground like a hound on the trail of a fox.
"Here," Rick said as he stopped. "She was here with many humans and a horse. Her scent was strong but is now weaker."
Thorn inspected the ground and mumbled as she walked around. She stopped next to Rick, "A wagon. There are wheel tracks. I can sense some magic. Faint."
"What does that mean," Rick asked in a panicked voice.
"That Rose rode in a wagon towards the town," Thorn was attempting to not worry, but the more they looked, the more worried she became.
The two strange companions walked in silence toward the town. Neither wanted to talk to the other. Clouds hung in the sky as if watching them walk. Rick pointed to a road that branched off from the main road. They followed it all the way to the side gate.
"Rick!" A guard shouted. Rick looked up and waved. The guard approached the two. "What brings you here?"
"We are looking for the Orc Shaman Rose," Thorn announced, bringing the guard's attention to her. His eyes went wide, and he looked up at the intimidating Orc.
"Uh, well, I, uh," The guard bowed, "Welcome to our town."
"Don't bow, boy. It leaves your head exposed. One swipe and I could take your head right off your shoulders," Thorn said, looking down. Wide-eyed, the guard looked up. Thorn smiled a toothy grin. "Orcs don't bow."
"Right, right, uh," The guard said, "I haven't seen any orcs this morning."
"I can smell her; she came this way," Rick said, getting agitated.
"Maybe yesterday," the guard shouted over his shoulder, "Who was on duty yesterday?"
"Ted," Someone shouted back.
The guard sighed exasperated, "Well, that doesn't do any good. He doesn't do any work." He looked at Rick, "Maybe she came through yesterday. Does she know anyone here?"
"Batty," Rick said excitedly, "She could be visiting Batty."
As the two left, the guard waved over another guard, "Run to the Mayor and tell him they are here."
"Why, sir? They don't seem here to make trouble?" The new guard said.
"Call it a gut feeling, Those two could level this town.”
"An old Orc and an imp?" The new guard laughed.
The guard looked at him, "Yes, now run!"
–
"Something isn't right," Rick said. "Here, the smell stops and turns. The tavern is that way," he pointed.
"Rick! Thorn!" Mayor Hamilton shouted as he ran up to them. His face was red from the exercise. He stopped before the two and caught his breath. "Uh, I, uh, welcome to our town, Shaman Thorn." He bowed his head. "Hi Rick, I heard you are looking for Rose."
"Yes, but her smell goes that way." The imp pointed.
"Oh," The Mayor squeaked. He frowned. Then he growled, "Oh."
"Something the matter, Mayor?" Thorn asked.
"Yes, there is someone who lives that way, and I'm hoping she has nothing to do with this," The Mayor said.
"With what?" Batty asked as she and Battleax walked up.
"Rose is missing!" Rick shouted.
"What!" Batty shouted. She looked at her dad, who was looking toward where Rick was pointing. "Doesn't Fytistone live down that lane?"
"Yes," Battleax and Hamilton said together.
Batty and Rick began a fast march down the lane, and the rest followed.
"We burn her house down," Batty said.
"We kill everyone and then burn down the house," Rick said.
"Okay, everyone, calm down," Battleax said. He looked at Hamilton, who shook his head.
"It's a bad day with a Battleax is telling everyone to calm down," Hamilton said.
Thorn barked a laugh, "Truth." Her voice lowered, "But those two have a point. Rose better be fine."
As they approached the house in question, Fytistone walked out the front door. "Oh my, good morning Mayor, Battleaxes." She looked at Rick and Thorn and sneered, "You."
"Ah, Fytistone, good morning, ah, yes," The Mayor began. "We are looking for a friend. Tall, green Orc goes by the name Rose."
"Never heard of it," Fytistone sneered.
"Right, right, so we have a missing Orc, and we are wondering…" The Mayor began.
"Good!" Fytistone shouted, "We can lose a few more of them."
"Where is she?" Batty shouted as she took a step forward.
Battleax grabbed her arm and said, "Not yet, Batty."
"Where is Rose?" Thorn asked in a low grumble.
"Not here," Fytistone rolled her eyes.
"I can smell her," Rick said.
Fytistone laughed, "Orc stench is everywhere now. One less Orc would make this town smell better."
Hamilton held his arms out, keeping Batty and Rick from charging Fytistone. "Now, Fytistone, uh, we are just wondering if you have seen her."
"No, and I don't like this accusation," Fytistone sneered, "I have things to do. So good…"
The house exploded.

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My boyfriend and I have been together since we were 16. We live together. Spilt everything 50/50. I’ve had a suspicion he’s cheating on me due to the lack of commitment from him. 8 years later and still no ring. The talk of marriage almost always angers him. I don’t necessarily need the marriage but I would like the ring as proof considering he has never gotten me anything of value in that sense. (No jewelry or anything over $150) We have a relationship where he never attends my family things but I attend as many of his as I can while balancing my own. My family hates him. Even the kids in the family dislike him. (He’s been around them maybe 3 times the whole time we’ve been together) he says it’s because he hates my sister but whatever not the point. Tonight I was looking for something in his closet and found his old phone. I have always had this wondering in the back of my head if he’s cheating because during our first 3 years together he did. (I did it back so I’m not perfect either) I decided to go through it. Naturally every account was logged out, but his email. I then discovered he has 3 emails. None of which are in his real name. One account I found a Snapchat dated early 2023. I found this odd because he deleted his in late 2022, because it was “stupid”. I continued to look and found the username. It wasn’t his real name, shocker. The account no longer exists or he’s changed the username/email to another one. I had nearly everyone I know check. I continued to the next email and found a twitter email. I never used it to know what it’s about so I set up an account and searched the username. The account follows 3 porn stars. There’s 3 porn starts happen to be women with penises. I am a female. Born with a vagina. We’ve had a healthy sex life our whole relationship. Since finding this I’ve been nearly crazy. I’ve already figured out somewhere to go and when I can get out. Am I overreacting? I feel his reasons for not buying me a ring are complete and utter bullshit now. I feel betrayed. I’ve wasted nearly half my life on this man to not be his taste. I love and respect him, but I don’t think I’m woman enough to let this go. How do I even bring it up? I want out without hurting him.

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I'm exploring the possibility that I might have NPD as well, so correct me here if I am wrong. But going through this sub has me a bit uncomfortable with the number of times I slipped into what I believe was psychosis without ever realizing it. The problem is that there are many times I think I experienced psychosis strongly, but I still believe they actually happened and weren't psychosis. I think because I am so aware of myself a lot of the time and think things are ridculous or I am a know-it-all, I don't suspect that I could actually have a problem. I'll list some examples below.
For example:

• During a several months long situationship with another girl, we continuously went in and out of contact---usually after an argument I started. During these "separations," I would manically search the Twin Flame subreddit for answers, do and listen to constant tarot readings, and literally (I'm not kidding here) hear God. At first it was greek deities, like Artemis or Hekate later on, but at one point, I was grieving the possibility of no longer having my best friend in my life and heard God tell me (like in my head, voice and all) that she was never going to leave me. When I told my situationship about this, she got genuinely scared for me. I just remember her going, "God? You heard...God?"
• Also during that situationship, I can strongly remember sitting on the floor, crying my eyes out and thinking I had magical powers. Like I could feel the power in my hands and I was fully convinced that if I could get further on the twin flame journey or something, I could harness the power of the universe or something? I had constant dreams about this as well. Like Hekate coming to me and telling me that I had a greater power inside of me than I realized.
• When I was younger, I got really obsessed with the CW show 'Reign,' which was about Mary, Queen of Scots. I got so attached her story (which wasn't historically accurate in the slightest btw) that I ended up having dreams that I was her handmaiden or something, and that I actually knew her in another life. I don't know that if grew into a full blown delusion but I was looking through a random family tree of mine and when I saw Scottish nobles (whose daughters could have been ladies maids), I was like I knew it!! Just to realize that actually wasn't part of my family line. So I think I did accept it as fact.
• Recently, I got into a situation with a girl at my old job (I got fired for poor performance). It was not a good situation at all. But I became fully convinced that this girl was communicating with me through song lyrics on the whiteboard in our workroom. Not only that, it led me to cross a boundary with her because she had already made it clear she wanted nothing to do with me, but I kept thinking she actually did because all the times she made it clear were through other people, and then she'd act differently from how she said she wanted things to be after I walked away from the situation in some way. I kept doing tarot readings that told me certain things to do, and I listened. However, even the cards told me that my assumptions were not based in reality. Like over and over. So idk. I just remember thinking I was completely correct, and then going back and looking over all the pictures and 'evidence' I had of her being 'after me' in some way, and being like, "Oh my god. This is literally all just a strong coincidence." Like at one point, the song of the day board (it was a list of dates and anyone could write a song for each date), there were titles like "Acknowledge Me," "We Still Don't Trust You," and "Honey, I'm Afraid." I thought these were all her, but when I showed other people, they said the handwriting didn't look the same. Like straight up told me the truth. It's kind of what broke me of my thinking, honestly. I'm still not completely convinced she and others WEREN'T screwing with me. But I do think that considering a lot of what guided my actions were the presence of deities speaking advice directly into my head, tarot cards (and tarot readings on tiktok), etc.
• A couple of times, I've caught myself half believing my dogs are robots. I only started to think this was a delusion after I looked at them earlier and saw them as just cute dogs. Now I am back to feeling like they could be robots.
• When I was in high school as well as later on in college, I remember thinking that a God was interested in me sexually and even doing the deed with them. Which...was strange. In high school, I think it was just a fantasy, but later on in college, I think that was honestly "real" in the sense that I thought it was real.
• I don't know that this was a full blown delusion, but as a kid, I remember thinking that since my under eyes turned a greenish blue after I cried (like a rainbow, I thought), that meant that I could possibly be the second coming of Christ? I also got a lot of messages from God a couple years later, like when I was sad, I'd ask for a sign that things were worth going on for and two seconds later a girl came up to me, gave me a donut, and walked away.

Idk. Now that I know when you are going through psychosis, you should go to a doctor, I think I'll keep that in mind for when I go through these moments. Probably would have saved my job, honestly.
Updated to add: I also struggle strongly with paranoia. I used to be paranoid in high school (2014-2017) that ISIS was going to come marching down my street and herd us all into camps or something. My dad used to tell us this was going to happen so it was a very honest to god fear of mine before I learned what islamophobia was. I wrote a whole short story about it. I also used to get constantly paranoid that someone was going to take me or come after me, but when I stopped watching Law and Order: SVU and other violent crime shows, I stopped getting so scared of this possibility.

I’m in the middle of a really bad episode of (probably pots?? My tilt table is next week, but im currently undiagnosed). Ive had pretty bad episodes before, but usually after i lie down, eat salt and drink lots of water ill be better in a day. Well its been two days and im now at my knees. Incredibly blurry vision, headache, feeling of impending doom (i was only watching a tv show so i wasnt anxious or anything, it just happens sometimes where i feel really anxious but im not), fast heart rate (150), and everything. I cant get myself to a stable state and i dont know what to do. Even just tilting my head up makes me dizzy. I feel so out of breath and helpless. Is there a possibility its anything else? Is there anything else i can even do to stop feeling like this? Its so painful. :(

I’m a 25 year old man. I was brutally bullied in high school and called a slave n***** boy any time I came across the dude who found joy in my suffering. He has given me black eyes which I had to go to the hospital to get checked, lifted me in the air while I was dizzy and slammed me on my stomach, body slammed me, put me in submissive head locks, spread rumours about me, called me the n word like it was nothing, and done a lot of other shady things behind close doors that I don’t know even since he had his group of friends supporting him.
He had my number back in high school and I have been receiving the same messages looking for the same "Karl" and "Kyle" every single month from 2016-2019. It was in 2019 where I received an apology from him (his 5th apology) about what he did to me in high school and said he already knows I hate my guts but wishes me the best. The messages stopped (but I changed my number the same year and deleted all my social media accounts). The bullies name Is Liam.
He has caused a lot of internal issues I still face every day of my life but now I realize he was still harassing me after high school because he didn’t have the chance to lay hands on me again because we never saw each other after grad.
I decided to check on Liam’s socials just to see and he’s deleted his instagram where he use to post pics of vacations with his girlfriend, videos of him shoulder pressing 90 lbs dumbbells on each arm and other ego filtered content. He only has Facebook and runs a business with a guy who he grew up with. This Liam kid graduated with marketing in 2023.
What do I do? For reference, I never received support throughout the bullying, I was isolated and further mocked. One of the reasons I have no friends

I’m a 25 year old man. I was brutally bullied in high school and called a slave n***** boy any time I came across the dude who found joy in my suffering. He has given me black eyes which I had to go to the hospital to get checked, lifted me in the air while I was dizzy and slammed me on my stomach, body slammed me, put me in submissive head locks, spread rumours about me, called me the n word like it was nothing, and done a lot of other shady things behind close doors that I don’t know even since he had his group of friends supporting him.
He had my number back in high school and I have been receiving the same messages looking for the same "Karl" and "Kyle" every single month from 2016-2019. It was in 2019 where I received an apology from him (his 5th apology) about what he did to me in high school and said he already knows I hate my guts but wishes me the best. The messages stopped (but I changed my number the same year and deleted all my social media accounts). The bullies name Is Liam.
He has caused a lot of internal issues I still face every day of my life but now I realize he was still harassing me after high school because he didn’t have the chance to lay hands on me again because we never saw each other after grad.
I decided to check on Liam’s socials just to see and he’s deleted his instagram where he use to post pics of vacations with his girlfriend, videos of him shoulder pressing 90 lbs dumbbells on each arm and other ego filtered content. He only has Facebook and runs a business with a guy who he grew up with. This Liam kid graduated with marketing in 2023.
What do I do? For reference, I never received support throughout the bullying, I was isolated and further mocked. One of the reasons I have no friends