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Le discours branlette du diamant
2015.10.01 18:45 Kate_4_President Le discours branlette du diamant
As a statement on the treatment of moderators by Reddit administrators, as well as a lack of communication and proper moderation tools, /JerkDiamondTalk has decided to go private for the time being. Please consult our attorneys, Mega_Toast, TortoiseSex, UnluckyLuke, Frenchfagscantqueue, and whoever the fuck else wants to be a fake internet lawyer for further info. thanks daddio PM me ur les mêmes and I'll make you un mod sincerely NinetoFiveHero aka diamo aka a gay
2024.05.16 00:36 Stock-Intention7731 I feel horribly ugly
I feel like I’m horribly ugly, my face at least. I’m also horrible at makeup. I got a haircut which turned out nothing like I hoped, instead of a cool fade I got a mushroom pancake because of my hair texture and receding hairline. I’d post a picture on a sub to get some advice but I don’t know if I can here or where. I guess I also posted on another subs today. I love my sense of fashion and I’m working hard on dieting and working out. But my face I feel like is a monster 😭
submitted by Stock-Intention7731 to trans [link] [comments]
2024.05.16 00:21 Loose_Software7977 I bought myself a Steam Deck
 | I bought myself a steam deck, but for first 15 minutes after getting it I had to pose for pictures with a smiling face. They will be posted on my instagram as being thankful to my wife for a birthday gift. submitted by Loose_Software7977 to SteamDeck [link] [comments] I repeat - I bought the deck from money that I gathered from cases since I was a teenager + contest where I won 100€ gift card for steam. My wife doesn't work, and after 1h cleaning around house and 7h of watching stuff on her laptop, she says she needs a help, since it's too tiring for her. And yet I had to make happy face and pose. I want to break my steam deck. |
2024.05.16 00:21 SpiritualCitron For my spanish speaking, Mac using designers.. which keyboard layout do you prefer?
I'm currently in the market for a new Macbook pro and find myself in the middle of a crossroads of sorts. I can either wait a little over a month and buy myself a Mac with the keyboard in spanish layout (which I would rather out of comfort) or I could go and buy an english layout one, like.. tomorrow..
tbh I would prefer it to be in spanish just to not have to remember where the accent keys are and whatever, but it's not a deal breaker. It is if a spanish layout is going to hinder my workflow in Figma.
Has anyone here faced that decision? What do you prefer? Why? thx in advance!
submitted by SpiritualCitron to UXDesign [link] [comments]
tbh I would prefer it to be in spanish just to not have to remember where the accent keys are and whatever, but it's not a deal breaker. It is if a spanish layout is going to hinder my workflow in Figma.
Has anyone here faced that decision? What do you prefer? Why? thx in advance!
2024.05.16 00:16 Necrolancer96 Summoning Kobolds At Midnight: A Tale of Suburbia & Sorcery. 200
Chapter CC
Trout's Landing.
Ruby stretched with a contented sigh. She turned her head over to where Jeb slept beside her. Or where he was when she fell asleep. She sat up and looked around the dark underground room but he wasn't here either.
"Wonder where he went."
Oh well, she thought as she stretched a few stiff muscles before hopping up and collecting their eggs. As nice as it was to sleep with them, they needed more consistent warmth. So she sat them to the side, bundled up in the still warm blanket, and departed to secure a source of fire for their eggs.
Which wasn't all that hard, she realized as her dark vision faded as the blue glow from the torches up ahead illuminated the main gathering area for the burrows. She smiled as she saw the tribe return to something familiar that she missed seeing for a while.
Several tunnels branched off towards the other cabins and already kobolds came and went from them as they began to migrate away from the chill air above for the, still cool but more comfortable, air below. As they did she could see the collections they brought back and forth. Animals, alive and dressed, were being moved down here and out of the elements for better care. As well as an easier time keeping the ever gluttonous salamanders from sneaking another meal. Scraps and salvage collected from around the lodge or while out exploring being brought down and being traded or even used to furnish the space.
Bits of wood with simple carvings were lodged into the dirt along side scraps of metal or rock with soot, mud, or crushed flower pigment to paint symbols or words on them for decoration or directions. While it wasn't the bustling forum that they once had, it gladdened her to see her tribe returning to normalcy once again.
She shook away the distracting thoughts and set her sights on some scrap of wood nearby. She darted over to the vendor, deftly avoiding a section of the ground being dug up as the kobolds dug ever deeper as they sought to expand their burrows ever more. It was in their nature to dig and burrow. While they no longer had a draconic master to excavate massive caverns and tunnels for, she wouldn't be surprised if kobold tunnels ended up expanding far past the border of the lodge itself and going far into the wild where they knew nothing about save for what little Jeb has told them.
Eventually, even this gathering area will be abandoned as the tribe moved deeper down, putting as much dirt and rock between them and whatever threats laid above. The only thing that would remain would be an assortment of traps to keep any invaders wary of going deeper than the kobolds wanted. Even then, many of the tunnels that would lead deeper would be dead-ends meant to slow or hinder any invader. Some would even be traps in and of themselves, collapsing the "tunnel" on top of even the most cautious of invader or even just blocking their escape and leaving them to die before the kobolds eventually dug out their remains and collected their gear with no trouble.
She stood before the assortment of wood and looked over the scrap. Some of it was processed lumber that looked to be from the buildings above, most was collected bits of wood from the forest though. Which was fine, she didn't need anything too big. No bartering took place. She was a leader of the tribe and it was assumed whatever she wanted was for the good of the tribe.
Even starting a warming fire for her eggs was good enough for the tribe to skip bartering and simply give her what she needed. So she collected enough wood for a nice fire and returned to her home. She sorted it into the indent in the ground that Jeb had placed their eggs in before. It would be a good place to start a heating fire for them, she thought as she finished arranging them.
She left and collected some tinder made of dried moss and grass before looking around for some stone or flint to start the fire with. But no such luck. All the stone was deeply imbedded in the dirt or was too large. She once more returned to the gathering area in search of fire. Which she quickly found in the form of the glowing blue fire that Jeb had created for the kobolds.
She shuffled a little as she stared at the dancing flame. She knew Jeb didn't like the idea of the kobolds using the blue fire. He probably wouldn't like the idea of heating their eggs with it either. She should be worried as well, she thought. But she wasn't. Staring at the flame reminded her of the vision that The Crone showed her. Of her and Jeb within a ring of flaming blue orbs. They were happy. The tribe was happy.
"He'll understand." She said as she darted and collected a piece of wood to transfer a spark from a nearby torch.
Ember in hand, she rushed back to her home. She gently eased the flame towards the bundle of wood. She yipped in shock when the flame leapt from her temporary torch and engulfed the pile! Their room burst into dancing shadows as the flames danced from their new home. So pretty, she thought as she stared at the fire. She had seen it when she would come out of their room in the old building for a break. But it seemed so mesmerizing now that it was right in front of her.
She widened the indent in the ground a little so that the eggs could receive the warmth from the fire without being too close. They might be mildly resistant to fire, but not enough to throw their eggs in a fire! Then again, she thought with worry as she held her claw out at the fire. The warmth from it isn't as strong as a normal fire it seemed. Like it was contained.
She clicked her claws in worry. She didn't want to push them too close, but they wouldn't get enough heat if they remained where they were. It would only get worse as it got colder and the cold seeped into the ground. Maybe just a little closer, she thought as she nudged the eggs closer to the fire.
The flames sputtered at the movement of air, but nothing more. She held out her claw to gauge the temperature once again. But it still wasn't enough, she thought as she clicked her claws against a nearby stone in thought. She cast a glance towards the tunnel. She could maybe see if one of the others have something to make a proper fire, she thought.
She put a claw on the eggs.
"No. That'll take too long."
She looked worryingly at the tunnel as if Jeb would appear and lambast her for even thinking what she was. She held her breath and pushed the eggs forwards. Then more. Then even more. The flames sputtered and danced as the eggs were pushed closer and closer. She could only just feel the heat as she did so. Why did the fire seem so weak, she thought as she pushed the eggs right up beside the bundle of burning wood.
Yet the fire seemed to move around the eggs, like they were doing their best to avoid touching them. Even the heat from the fire seemed to be avoiding them! Ruby growled in frustration and pushed the eggs right into the fire!
"Can you just keep them warm?!"
The fire stilled and froze as the eggs were pushed into it. As if it didn't know what to do. Then the flame roared to life once again. The balefire caressed the onyx shells as it seemed to dance across the smooth black surface of the shells. As if a barrier broke, the heat from the flame radiated outwards now. Ruby could now feel the warmth from the fire where seconds ago she felt nothing.
Ruby blinked at the eldritch flame and moved her claw to touch her eggs. She instinctively pulled back as a tongue of balefire arced in her direction. She whined in worry at possibly making a terrible mistake. She held her breath and once more reached out to caress her eggs. She bit her tongue and shut her eyes when the fire arced towards her once more.
But she didn't feel pain. No burning sensation one would get when normally sticking an appendage into a roaring fire. Instead she felt a comforting warmth. Like she felt when close to Jeb as they slept together. She cracked open an eye and found the baleful flame caressing her claw. She experimented a little by pulling her claw back, feeling as the flame seemed to latch on like it didn't want her to leave, before snapping back to its "body". She pushed her claw into the fire, further this time, all the way up to her elbow. The fire latched onto her once again and flooded her with a comforting warmth that shot straight to her core!
She turned her claw upwards and pulled back once more. She watched as the flame held on as she did so, once more refusing to leave her scales. She watched as the flame snapped once again, but this time, it broke! Instead of snapping back towards its body, she now held a burning ball of balefire in her claw!
She couldn't do magic. There were few of the tribe that could before they fled to this world. The Chief was the last among them that had any ability to harness it. Yet here she was, holding a magical fire within her claw! She watched as the flame danced and twisted in her grasp. She sucked in a breath when she watched it start to diffuse INTO her scales! The flame lessened and lessened as if it were dying, but instead the fire seeped between the cracks of her scales. She could feel it racing through her body, flooding it once more with a wave of comforting warmth.
"Den Mother?" A voice asked from the tunnel nearby.
Ruby yelped in surprise and turned towards the voice. She saw the Chief standing there watching her with a curious and amazed expression on his snout.
"Having fun?"
"Chief!? I was-"
"Playing with fire?" The Chief asked playfully as he stared at the blue fire.
She shuffled nervously as he did so. Eventually he chuckled and she began to relax.
"It's alright Den Mother. You're not the only one that Master Jeb's flame as entranced among the tribe."
"Why do you think it acts so different from normal fire?" She asked.
The Chief shrugged.
"Who knows. Perhaps it is how magic works in this world. Perhaps it is something on Master Jeb's part. Perhaps it is because our former- Kortaza, was the Keeper of Flame."
"But we never had much protection from fire before. And not any way to manipulate it." Ruby said.
The Chief sighed.
"True. I truly do not know why it is so different than normal fire. Fire is alive, yes. But this one seems almost..."
"Living?" Ruby suggested.
"Yes. Like it has a mind of its own. Though I doubt that much, perhaps it merely follows the will of Master Jeb, knowingly or not on his part." The Chief continued as he walked closer and sat down beside Ruby and watched the eggs glimmer and shine within the fire where they remained quiet for some peaceful moments.
The Chief then perked up.
"Oh! Master Jeb returned!"
"He did?! Where is he?" Ruby asked and looked around expecting to see him coming down the tunnel.
"Well, he did return. Rushed around and collected an assortment of food, and then he vanished away again. Something about a trade?" The Chief explained a little unsure.
She frowned, wonder what he was trading, she thought. Though, with the eggs now taken care of, and Jeb away for a moment. Perhaps now was the time she could see about doing something special for him. She turned to the Chief, he was more knowledgeable when it came to humans and their customs.
"Chief?" She asked.
"Yes? What is it?" He asked at the tone of her voice.
"What do you know of this world's humans?"
"Oh? What would you like to know?" He asked a little excited in being able to use his collected knowledge.
"What do humans do with those they care about?" She asked a little uncertainly.
The Chief hummed in thought and tapped his claws.
"It depends. Humans are as diverse in this world as ours. Many customs I've read about belong to different groups."
"What about the tribe that Jeb belongs to?"
The Chief hummed once more in thought and got up before darting away while calling back.
"I will check! I'm sure I have something!"
While she waited, she continued to play with fire and tend to her eggs. Since they were in the flame, they didn't need quite so studious attention as they did before. She could probably just leave them and go tend to her normal duties and not have to worry about them anymore.
Who was she fooling, she thought. Even if there was a way to hatch and tend to the eggs completely without her, she'd still want to look after them. She thought she heard Jeb mentioning something about an "electrical egg incubator" once upon a time. Whatever that was.
The Chief returned, huffing from being out of breath and holding a thickly bound tome with pages of different sizes and colors poking out of the patched bindings. He placed the heavy tome on the ground with a huff.
"This is my collection of this world's customs and knowledge. If there is something that will assist you it will be in here somewhere!"
Ruby oohed and awed as the Chief flipped open the tome and leafed through page after page of information. Some were pages from magazines, others were snippets and clippings from books, there was a few pages that contained pressed cuttings of local flora as well as a collection of small animal bones among the bindings.
They stopped on a page that read MODERN COURTING FOR THE MODERN WOMAN in bold letters on a page that felt smooth to the touch. On the cover was a gorgeous human woman wearing a sleek beautiful dress and jewelry. Ruby pointed towards the page.
"Oh this one!"
They thumbed through the pages looking for information. Most neither one of them got as it talked about stuff like make-up, libido, popular fashion, and other things that they didn't either understand or see the appeal of. Then they found a page that described how a modern woman should act. Though this seemed to confuse the both of them even more.
"Be 'dem-or' and assertive? What does 'dem-or' mean?" Ruby asked the Chief.
"I'm not sure. There are many words within that don't seem to fit." He explained.
A pattern they soon found to be common among the pages of information, much of the words would make sense but spread out among them were these spots of words that seemed just out of place. What they COULD understand still didn't make any sense either.
"Be soft yet firm? How does that work?" The Chief asked.
"If you like a potential mate why make him keep trying to win your heart?" Ruby asked equally confused.
"Modern" humans were just as confusing to them it seemed. However, among the pages of contradictory information, they were able to get SOMETHING of value! Humans like gifts. Though they both knew that and didn't really feel like these pages of "modern courting" did anything more than confuse them.
"What kind of gifts?" The Chief asked as he and Ruby tried to decipher the mess of flowery wording and nonsense.
"Jewelry, clothes, food." Ruby read off as they got the general gist of the overly convoluted wording. The pictures helped more though.
"Well! At least we found something... I think?" The Chief declared at least with a little uncertainty.
"Why did you collect all this?" Ruby asked.
"It was in a book, so I thought it was important. But it would seem that not everything in this world's books are worth keeping." The Chief stated before retrieving the tome and departing.
"Where are you going?"
"To go through my collection. It would seem that some of it is not as important as I first thought." He called out as he left.
She could hear him mumbling to himself and heard the occasional tearing as he did. Well, at least they found something, she thought as she turned towards the eggs once more. She placed a claw on the onyx shells and felt the comforting warmth of the fire as well as the warmth of the eggs. They'll be fine for now, she thought as she got up and left.
"Jewelry, clothes, and food." Ruby murmured as she went down the tunnel once again.
He was getting low on clothes, she thought. But there wasn't much around here to make some with. Though perhaps some animal hides would work? But much of what they've collected was too small for clothes of Jeb's size. Getting him food seemed redundant too. He could make his own food whenever he wished. Which left jewelry.
It was the better of the options, but they didn't have much in the way of jewelry either. No raids means no loot and the piles of treasure back in their former home wasn't exactly a priority at the time of their exodus. But then she spied the copper wire the kobolds had collected while scavenging. A copper band would be nice, she thought as she was given the piece of wiring from the scavenger.
But what else, she thought as she looked around some more. The pictures in the magazine showed jewelry that glittered with gold and diamonds and so much more that they no longer had. Nothing around here could compare, she thought dejectedly. But then she saw a group of kobolds coming down a tunnel with a collection of shells and waterlogged timber.
"What is this?" She asked them.
"Salvage from the camps up river." The kobold replied as he and the others began to sift and sort the mess.
She watched as they distributed everything they collected to the tribe that came over. Some took the waterlogged wood, others took polished stones, and others took the collection of shells. She eyed the shells. Back home, alot of the fishfolk in the rivers and around the sea collected pearls from the water. Perhaps the ones upriver also had some?
She followed after the group of kobolds that had collected the shells and assisted them in opening a few. Mussels were what was mainly here, no surprise though since it seemed they were far from this world's ocean. What was a surprise was how many pearls they actually managed to find among the mussels!
It was rare for the kobolds to find one during their fishing trips by the sea. Even among the rivers pearls were not much more common. So it surprised them that several mussels had multiple pearls within them! She was going to actually barter for potentially the single one they found, but with there being so many the shuckers didn't mind at all and gave Ruby a small handful for her project.
They weren't all that big, but that was fine by her. They'd do for what she had in mind. She borrowed a small thin metal needle from a scavenger and retreated back to her room. Copper wire and freshwater pearls in claw.
-----
Well, that's taken care of, Jeb thought as he appeared in the open air of the lodge. He flicked the gold and garnet band into the air and got it with a spring in his step and a tune on his lips as he made his way over to the Trap Master who stood near the river where he received reports from the salvagers.
"How's things?" He asked when he got close.
"Good. Strange. But good." The Trap Master stated as he dismissed the salvagers.
"How so?"
"The 'murlocs' you called them? Haven't returned to their former homes." He explained.
"And? Wasn't that kinda the point?"
"It was. But there isn't any sign of anything else other than birds flocking to the area."
"Again, wasn't that the point?"
"Only if something worse didn't move in." The Trap Master explained further.
Jeb groaned.
"What moved in?"
"Nothing."
"Nothin'?"
"That we can see. No new tracks, no scents, nothing."
"So what's the problem?"
"The problem is that much carrion should've drawn every scavenger and hungry animal for miles."
"But it hasn't." Jeb finished.
"No. The birds infest the area but largely leave us alone. Though some get a little territorial over their spots of carrion. But nothing else has moved into the area."
Jeb groaned again.
"So what do you wanna do?"
"Nothing."
"Really?" Jeb asked in surprise.
"Yes. If the other animals and creatures nearby are giving the place a wide berth then we'll exploit it as long as we can. We'll send some scouts to keep an eye on the place though."
"Perhaps the smell of death is what's doin' it?" Jeb suggested.
"Maybe. Would explain the large number of birds. But nothing else?"
"Yeah, you're right. Well let me know if you need help with it." Jeb said.
"Will do."
"Oh! Before I forget, I made a trade agreement with the dwarves."
The Trap Master cocked a scaled brow.
"Oh?"
"Yeah. Food for tools. We'll need to set aside five crates twice a week, but we'll get some decent tools to help speed up excavation." Jeb explained.
The Trap Master tapped his claws against his scales in thought.
"That's doable."
"You sure? Cuz I'm more than happy to do it all myself." Jeb said and conjured an apple to make his point.
"No. The tools are for us, we should assist. Besides, we gathered more for our former master. Five crates twice a week will be easy enough to do." The Trap Master stated in a relaxed tone.
"Alright, if you're certain." Jeb said.
"I am. We'll let you know if anything changes." The Trap Master replied.
"Alright, have it your way." Jeb returned and departed while tossing the conjured apple towards the lazing salamanders nearby.
Jeb ported down to the main gathering area. The place was just as busy as when he left as the kobolds went about their duties and tasks with vigor and joy that he's only really seen when they were staying in his basement. Guess he was the one living in their basement now, he thought with a chuckle.
He played with the gold and garnet band as he shuffled nervously. Wasn't sure why he was so nervous, he thought. She already had his kids, kinda, sorta. They were already living together. This would just be the natural progression of things. Kinda, sorta. He heaved in a big gulp of air to steady his nerves.
"Alright. Quite procrastinatin' Jeb." He muttered to himself and started down the tunnel towards his home.
He stopped when his boot stepped on something different. He looked down and picked up a magazine page.
"Modern courtin' for the modern woman? Where the hell did this come from?"
Probably Sammy's, Jeb thought as he tossed aside the girly garbage. Not sure what it was doing out here though. Maybe she brought it for Thanksgiving and forgot it? Or maybe the kobolds swiped it when they raided her hairspray? Or maybe she just left it among his other articles one of the times she and his pa would go over to his place.
"Oh well." He said as he continued on.
He could hear humming as he got closer, and saw a familiar pale blue light. He walked into his room and saw Ruby humming as she tinkered with something. Nearby was their eggs, sitting in the balefire. He should've panicked. He should've dropped everything and ran over trying to save his kids. That's what a father would do right?
But he didn't have that gut wrenching feeling of seeing your kids in danger he thought he would. Still, he walked over beside Ruby. She yelped in surprise and fumbled with what she was working on as Jeb reached out a hand and touched their onyx colored eggs.
"Jeb?! I was- They were-" Ruby tried to explain while also trying to gather her things.
"It's alright." Jeb said.
"It is?" She asked with concern.
"Yeah. They're not hot." He said as he stroked the shells through the fire that did nothing to him.
"Are you sure?" She asked with worry and concern.
"Yeah. Doubt it'll do anythin' more to 'em." Jeb said with a bit more bitterness in his voice than he wanted there to be.
He saw Ruby's face fall at his words. Nice job dickhead, Jeb thought to himself. He sighed and turned towards Ruby.
"I'm sorry. I'm just nervous 'bout everythin' happenin'."
"I'm nervous too." She stated and leaned into him for a hug, which he eagerly returned.
They held each other for a long moment before Ruby perked up and scrambled away.
"Hold on! Don't look!"
"Look at what?" Jeb asked with a cocked brow as he did his best to hide his own gift.
"I said don't look!" She chided.
"Alright!" He said with a laugh.
He turned away as he heard her grumbling and fumbling with whatever she was working on when he walked in on her. While he waited, he stretched out his hand and caressed their eggs. Please don't get any weirder, he pleaded mentally while he waited.
"Ok! You can look now!" Ruby called at last.
Jeb turned back around and saw Ruby holding a ring towards him. It was some braided copper wire with a couple of small pearls threaded on. She held it up to him.
"What do you think?"
Wait, was this a gift or was she asking him to marry her, Jeb thought. He had to say something though, the look of confusion on his face was making Ruby sad.
"I love it! What's it for exactly?"
"Well, I'm courting you!" She said as Jeb accepted the copper and pearl braided band.
"Courtin' me? What does that-" Jeb started when he noticed a rustle from his left boot.
He looked down and pulled off a piece of paper that had stuck to it. MODERN COURTING FOR THE MODERN WOMAN, it said in bold on the paper. He turned it around towards Ruby.
"Did you read this?"
She shuffled.
"Yes? I wasn't sure how you court a human in this world! But the words were confusing and didn't make any sense and- why are you laughing?"
"I'm laughin' because this is trash! None of the stuff in here is how you should court someone!" Jeb said with a laugh.
"But it says-" Ruby started when Jeb tossed the magazine paper into the nearby fire, which ate it instantly.
"It's just somethin' that girls read to pass the time. Nothin' in there is worth the paper it's printed on." Jeb declared.
"Oh. So?" Ruby asked dejectedly as she gestured to the ring she made for Jeb.
"This is just fine. Though do you know what it means to get a ring for someone?" Jeb asked.
"That they love one another?" Ruby said a little unsure now.
"Yeah. I guess it does. But the act of givin' someone you love a ring is a symbol that you want to be together." Jeb explained and produced his own gift for Ruby.
Her eyes went wide as she grasped the gold and garnet band.
"But we're already together."
"Yeah. We are."
"So what does the rings mean?" Ruby asked as she examined the band.
"Well, it's more religious really."
"Oh?"
"Yeah. It's supposed to mean... somethin'." Jeb started as he realized he didn't entirely recall what the meaning of the ring was supposed to mean.
"Mean what?" Ruby pressed as she tried to fit the band on her arm and then her tail.
"Well. It generally means being together forever."
"But why the ring?"
"It means a sort of exclusivity for folk." Jeb explained.
"Why? What about the rest of the tribe? Does that mean you won't help them?" She asked.
"No! I can, or will, or... this is harder than I thought it'd be." Jeb said with a sigh.
Ruby cocked a brow as well.
"So what happens?"
"Well, we exchange rings and promise to love one another forever. In sickness and health and yada yada. Then we're husband and wife." Jeb explained.
"Why? We're already mates and we love one another. What does our health have to do with it? And what is a 'husband and wife'?"
"Well... You know what? Forget it. Do you promise to love me?"
"Yes! Do you?"
"Yup!"
"Yay!" Ruby cried and hugged Jeb.
"And I now pronounce you man and wife." Jeb muttered as he kissed Ruby.
Ruby giggled and pulled away.
"So what happens now?"
"Now... I don't know. Usually there would also be paper work, but given... us, it prob'bly wouldn't matter."
"So what changes?" Ruby asked as she affixed the gold and garnet band to one of her horns with a smile.
"Uhm... nothin'? We're already together, we already live together, we already have kids... kinda." Jeb listed off.
"So what's the rings supposed to mean?"
"It means... I love you." Jeb replied at last, giving up on trying to explain something he himself wasn't entirely informed of.
"I love you too!" Ruby cried and kissed him.
He returned the kiss. Not like this would've been an official wedding anyway, Jeb thought. They don't exactly have a licensed priest to officiate it. Or witnesses. He doubt their still shelled eggs would count. He could ask the Chief to oversee it. But he already got a headache trying to explain marriage to Ruby, he didn't really want to explain it to the Chief, or any other kobolds that might be interested.
Not like it made anything different, Jeb thought. Ruby was right. They loved one another. They lived together. They had kids together. For all intense and purpose, they were mates. Sure if he was particularly religious he could insist on going to a church and doing things official. But given how things have turned out for them lately, he wouldn't be surprised if he burst into flames stepping inside a church.
Well, there was ONE tradition that they could still do, Jeb thought with a smirk as he picked up Ruby bridal style.
"Wanna consummate our marriage?"
"What does that mean?" She asked.
"Don't worry. You'll like it." Jeb said as he led her over to their moss bed.
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submitted by Necrolancer96 to HFY [link] [comments]
Trout's Landing.
Ruby stretched with a contented sigh. She turned her head over to where Jeb slept beside her. Or where he was when she fell asleep. She sat up and looked around the dark underground room but he wasn't here either.
"Wonder where he went."
Oh well, she thought as she stretched a few stiff muscles before hopping up and collecting their eggs. As nice as it was to sleep with them, they needed more consistent warmth. So she sat them to the side, bundled up in the still warm blanket, and departed to secure a source of fire for their eggs.
Which wasn't all that hard, she realized as her dark vision faded as the blue glow from the torches up ahead illuminated the main gathering area for the burrows. She smiled as she saw the tribe return to something familiar that she missed seeing for a while.
Several tunnels branched off towards the other cabins and already kobolds came and went from them as they began to migrate away from the chill air above for the, still cool but more comfortable, air below. As they did she could see the collections they brought back and forth. Animals, alive and dressed, were being moved down here and out of the elements for better care. As well as an easier time keeping the ever gluttonous salamanders from sneaking another meal. Scraps and salvage collected from around the lodge or while out exploring being brought down and being traded or even used to furnish the space.
Bits of wood with simple carvings were lodged into the dirt along side scraps of metal or rock with soot, mud, or crushed flower pigment to paint symbols or words on them for decoration or directions. While it wasn't the bustling forum that they once had, it gladdened her to see her tribe returning to normalcy once again.
She shook away the distracting thoughts and set her sights on some scrap of wood nearby. She darted over to the vendor, deftly avoiding a section of the ground being dug up as the kobolds dug ever deeper as they sought to expand their burrows ever more. It was in their nature to dig and burrow. While they no longer had a draconic master to excavate massive caverns and tunnels for, she wouldn't be surprised if kobold tunnels ended up expanding far past the border of the lodge itself and going far into the wild where they knew nothing about save for what little Jeb has told them.
Eventually, even this gathering area will be abandoned as the tribe moved deeper down, putting as much dirt and rock between them and whatever threats laid above. The only thing that would remain would be an assortment of traps to keep any invaders wary of going deeper than the kobolds wanted. Even then, many of the tunnels that would lead deeper would be dead-ends meant to slow or hinder any invader. Some would even be traps in and of themselves, collapsing the "tunnel" on top of even the most cautious of invader or even just blocking their escape and leaving them to die before the kobolds eventually dug out their remains and collected their gear with no trouble.
She stood before the assortment of wood and looked over the scrap. Some of it was processed lumber that looked to be from the buildings above, most was collected bits of wood from the forest though. Which was fine, she didn't need anything too big. No bartering took place. She was a leader of the tribe and it was assumed whatever she wanted was for the good of the tribe.
Even starting a warming fire for her eggs was good enough for the tribe to skip bartering and simply give her what she needed. So she collected enough wood for a nice fire and returned to her home. She sorted it into the indent in the ground that Jeb had placed their eggs in before. It would be a good place to start a heating fire for them, she thought as she finished arranging them.
She left and collected some tinder made of dried moss and grass before looking around for some stone or flint to start the fire with. But no such luck. All the stone was deeply imbedded in the dirt or was too large. She once more returned to the gathering area in search of fire. Which she quickly found in the form of the glowing blue fire that Jeb had created for the kobolds.
She shuffled a little as she stared at the dancing flame. She knew Jeb didn't like the idea of the kobolds using the blue fire. He probably wouldn't like the idea of heating their eggs with it either. She should be worried as well, she thought. But she wasn't. Staring at the flame reminded her of the vision that The Crone showed her. Of her and Jeb within a ring of flaming blue orbs. They were happy. The tribe was happy.
"He'll understand." She said as she darted and collected a piece of wood to transfer a spark from a nearby torch.
Ember in hand, she rushed back to her home. She gently eased the flame towards the bundle of wood. She yipped in shock when the flame leapt from her temporary torch and engulfed the pile! Their room burst into dancing shadows as the flames danced from their new home. So pretty, she thought as she stared at the fire. She had seen it when she would come out of their room in the old building for a break. But it seemed so mesmerizing now that it was right in front of her.
She widened the indent in the ground a little so that the eggs could receive the warmth from the fire without being too close. They might be mildly resistant to fire, but not enough to throw their eggs in a fire! Then again, she thought with worry as she held her claw out at the fire. The warmth from it isn't as strong as a normal fire it seemed. Like it was contained.
She clicked her claws in worry. She didn't want to push them too close, but they wouldn't get enough heat if they remained where they were. It would only get worse as it got colder and the cold seeped into the ground. Maybe just a little closer, she thought as she nudged the eggs closer to the fire.
The flames sputtered at the movement of air, but nothing more. She held out her claw to gauge the temperature once again. But it still wasn't enough, she thought as she clicked her claws against a nearby stone in thought. She cast a glance towards the tunnel. She could maybe see if one of the others have something to make a proper fire, she thought.
She put a claw on the eggs.
"No. That'll take too long."
She looked worryingly at the tunnel as if Jeb would appear and lambast her for even thinking what she was. She held her breath and pushed the eggs forwards. Then more. Then even more. The flames sputtered and danced as the eggs were pushed closer and closer. She could only just feel the heat as she did so. Why did the fire seem so weak, she thought as she pushed the eggs right up beside the bundle of burning wood.
Yet the fire seemed to move around the eggs, like they were doing their best to avoid touching them. Even the heat from the fire seemed to be avoiding them! Ruby growled in frustration and pushed the eggs right into the fire!
"Can you just keep them warm?!"
The fire stilled and froze as the eggs were pushed into it. As if it didn't know what to do. Then the flame roared to life once again. The balefire caressed the onyx shells as it seemed to dance across the smooth black surface of the shells. As if a barrier broke, the heat from the flame radiated outwards now. Ruby could now feel the warmth from the fire where seconds ago she felt nothing.
Ruby blinked at the eldritch flame and moved her claw to touch her eggs. She instinctively pulled back as a tongue of balefire arced in her direction. She whined in worry at possibly making a terrible mistake. She held her breath and once more reached out to caress her eggs. She bit her tongue and shut her eyes when the fire arced towards her once more.
But she didn't feel pain. No burning sensation one would get when normally sticking an appendage into a roaring fire. Instead she felt a comforting warmth. Like she felt when close to Jeb as they slept together. She cracked open an eye and found the baleful flame caressing her claw. She experimented a little by pulling her claw back, feeling as the flame seemed to latch on like it didn't want her to leave, before snapping back to its "body". She pushed her claw into the fire, further this time, all the way up to her elbow. The fire latched onto her once again and flooded her with a comforting warmth that shot straight to her core!
She turned her claw upwards and pulled back once more. She watched as the flame held on as she did so, once more refusing to leave her scales. She watched as the flame snapped once again, but this time, it broke! Instead of snapping back towards its body, she now held a burning ball of balefire in her claw!
She couldn't do magic. There were few of the tribe that could before they fled to this world. The Chief was the last among them that had any ability to harness it. Yet here she was, holding a magical fire within her claw! She watched as the flame danced and twisted in her grasp. She sucked in a breath when she watched it start to diffuse INTO her scales! The flame lessened and lessened as if it were dying, but instead the fire seeped between the cracks of her scales. She could feel it racing through her body, flooding it once more with a wave of comforting warmth.
"Den Mother?" A voice asked from the tunnel nearby.
Ruby yelped in surprise and turned towards the voice. She saw the Chief standing there watching her with a curious and amazed expression on his snout.
"Having fun?"
"Chief!? I was-"
"Playing with fire?" The Chief asked playfully as he stared at the blue fire.
She shuffled nervously as he did so. Eventually he chuckled and she began to relax.
"It's alright Den Mother. You're not the only one that Master Jeb's flame as entranced among the tribe."
"Why do you think it acts so different from normal fire?" She asked.
The Chief shrugged.
"Who knows. Perhaps it is how magic works in this world. Perhaps it is something on Master Jeb's part. Perhaps it is because our former- Kortaza, was the Keeper of Flame."
"But we never had much protection from fire before. And not any way to manipulate it." Ruby said.
The Chief sighed.
"True. I truly do not know why it is so different than normal fire. Fire is alive, yes. But this one seems almost..."
"Living?" Ruby suggested.
"Yes. Like it has a mind of its own. Though I doubt that much, perhaps it merely follows the will of Master Jeb, knowingly or not on his part." The Chief continued as he walked closer and sat down beside Ruby and watched the eggs glimmer and shine within the fire where they remained quiet for some peaceful moments.
The Chief then perked up.
"Oh! Master Jeb returned!"
"He did?! Where is he?" Ruby asked and looked around expecting to see him coming down the tunnel.
"Well, he did return. Rushed around and collected an assortment of food, and then he vanished away again. Something about a trade?" The Chief explained a little unsure.
She frowned, wonder what he was trading, she thought. Though, with the eggs now taken care of, and Jeb away for a moment. Perhaps now was the time she could see about doing something special for him. She turned to the Chief, he was more knowledgeable when it came to humans and their customs.
"Chief?" She asked.
"Yes? What is it?" He asked at the tone of her voice.
"What do you know of this world's humans?"
"Oh? What would you like to know?" He asked a little excited in being able to use his collected knowledge.
"What do humans do with those they care about?" She asked a little uncertainly.
The Chief hummed in thought and tapped his claws.
"It depends. Humans are as diverse in this world as ours. Many customs I've read about belong to different groups."
"What about the tribe that Jeb belongs to?"
The Chief hummed once more in thought and got up before darting away while calling back.
"I will check! I'm sure I have something!"
While she waited, she continued to play with fire and tend to her eggs. Since they were in the flame, they didn't need quite so studious attention as they did before. She could probably just leave them and go tend to her normal duties and not have to worry about them anymore.
Who was she fooling, she thought. Even if there was a way to hatch and tend to the eggs completely without her, she'd still want to look after them. She thought she heard Jeb mentioning something about an "electrical egg incubator" once upon a time. Whatever that was.
The Chief returned, huffing from being out of breath and holding a thickly bound tome with pages of different sizes and colors poking out of the patched bindings. He placed the heavy tome on the ground with a huff.
"This is my collection of this world's customs and knowledge. If there is something that will assist you it will be in here somewhere!"
Ruby oohed and awed as the Chief flipped open the tome and leafed through page after page of information. Some were pages from magazines, others were snippets and clippings from books, there was a few pages that contained pressed cuttings of local flora as well as a collection of small animal bones among the bindings.
They stopped on a page that read MODERN COURTING FOR THE MODERN WOMAN in bold letters on a page that felt smooth to the touch. On the cover was a gorgeous human woman wearing a sleek beautiful dress and jewelry. Ruby pointed towards the page.
"Oh this one!"
They thumbed through the pages looking for information. Most neither one of them got as it talked about stuff like make-up, libido, popular fashion, and other things that they didn't either understand or see the appeal of. Then they found a page that described how a modern woman should act. Though this seemed to confuse the both of them even more.
"Be 'dem-or' and assertive? What does 'dem-or' mean?" Ruby asked the Chief.
"I'm not sure. There are many words within that don't seem to fit." He explained.
A pattern they soon found to be common among the pages of information, much of the words would make sense but spread out among them were these spots of words that seemed just out of place. What they COULD understand still didn't make any sense either.
"Be soft yet firm? How does that work?" The Chief asked.
"If you like a potential mate why make him keep trying to win your heart?" Ruby asked equally confused.
"Modern" humans were just as confusing to them it seemed. However, among the pages of contradictory information, they were able to get SOMETHING of value! Humans like gifts. Though they both knew that and didn't really feel like these pages of "modern courting" did anything more than confuse them.
"What kind of gifts?" The Chief asked as he and Ruby tried to decipher the mess of flowery wording and nonsense.
"Jewelry, clothes, food." Ruby read off as they got the general gist of the overly convoluted wording. The pictures helped more though.
"Well! At least we found something... I think?" The Chief declared at least with a little uncertainty.
"Why did you collect all this?" Ruby asked.
"It was in a book, so I thought it was important. But it would seem that not everything in this world's books are worth keeping." The Chief stated before retrieving the tome and departing.
"Where are you going?"
"To go through my collection. It would seem that some of it is not as important as I first thought." He called out as he left.
She could hear him mumbling to himself and heard the occasional tearing as he did. Well, at least they found something, she thought as she turned towards the eggs once more. She placed a claw on the onyx shells and felt the comforting warmth of the fire as well as the warmth of the eggs. They'll be fine for now, she thought as she got up and left.
"Jewelry, clothes, and food." Ruby murmured as she went down the tunnel once again.
He was getting low on clothes, she thought. But there wasn't much around here to make some with. Though perhaps some animal hides would work? But much of what they've collected was too small for clothes of Jeb's size. Getting him food seemed redundant too. He could make his own food whenever he wished. Which left jewelry.
It was the better of the options, but they didn't have much in the way of jewelry either. No raids means no loot and the piles of treasure back in their former home wasn't exactly a priority at the time of their exodus. But then she spied the copper wire the kobolds had collected while scavenging. A copper band would be nice, she thought as she was given the piece of wiring from the scavenger.
But what else, she thought as she looked around some more. The pictures in the magazine showed jewelry that glittered with gold and diamonds and so much more that they no longer had. Nothing around here could compare, she thought dejectedly. But then she saw a group of kobolds coming down a tunnel with a collection of shells and waterlogged timber.
"What is this?" She asked them.
"Salvage from the camps up river." The kobold replied as he and the others began to sift and sort the mess.
She watched as they distributed everything they collected to the tribe that came over. Some took the waterlogged wood, others took polished stones, and others took the collection of shells. She eyed the shells. Back home, alot of the fishfolk in the rivers and around the sea collected pearls from the water. Perhaps the ones upriver also had some?
She followed after the group of kobolds that had collected the shells and assisted them in opening a few. Mussels were what was mainly here, no surprise though since it seemed they were far from this world's ocean. What was a surprise was how many pearls they actually managed to find among the mussels!
It was rare for the kobolds to find one during their fishing trips by the sea. Even among the rivers pearls were not much more common. So it surprised them that several mussels had multiple pearls within them! She was going to actually barter for potentially the single one they found, but with there being so many the shuckers didn't mind at all and gave Ruby a small handful for her project.
They weren't all that big, but that was fine by her. They'd do for what she had in mind. She borrowed a small thin metal needle from a scavenger and retreated back to her room. Copper wire and freshwater pearls in claw.
-----
Well, that's taken care of, Jeb thought as he appeared in the open air of the lodge. He flicked the gold and garnet band into the air and got it with a spring in his step and a tune on his lips as he made his way over to the Trap Master who stood near the river where he received reports from the salvagers.
"How's things?" He asked when he got close.
"Good. Strange. But good." The Trap Master stated as he dismissed the salvagers.
"How so?"
"The 'murlocs' you called them? Haven't returned to their former homes." He explained.
"And? Wasn't that kinda the point?"
"It was. But there isn't any sign of anything else other than birds flocking to the area."
"Again, wasn't that the point?"
"Only if something worse didn't move in." The Trap Master explained further.
Jeb groaned.
"What moved in?"
"Nothing."
"Nothin'?"
"That we can see. No new tracks, no scents, nothing."
"So what's the problem?"
"The problem is that much carrion should've drawn every scavenger and hungry animal for miles."
"But it hasn't." Jeb finished.
"No. The birds infest the area but largely leave us alone. Though some get a little territorial over their spots of carrion. But nothing else has moved into the area."
Jeb groaned again.
"So what do you wanna do?"
"Nothing."
"Really?" Jeb asked in surprise.
"Yes. If the other animals and creatures nearby are giving the place a wide berth then we'll exploit it as long as we can. We'll send some scouts to keep an eye on the place though."
"Perhaps the smell of death is what's doin' it?" Jeb suggested.
"Maybe. Would explain the large number of birds. But nothing else?"
"Yeah, you're right. Well let me know if you need help with it." Jeb said.
"Will do."
"Oh! Before I forget, I made a trade agreement with the dwarves."
The Trap Master cocked a scaled brow.
"Oh?"
"Yeah. Food for tools. We'll need to set aside five crates twice a week, but we'll get some decent tools to help speed up excavation." Jeb explained.
The Trap Master tapped his claws against his scales in thought.
"That's doable."
"You sure? Cuz I'm more than happy to do it all myself." Jeb said and conjured an apple to make his point.
"No. The tools are for us, we should assist. Besides, we gathered more for our former master. Five crates twice a week will be easy enough to do." The Trap Master stated in a relaxed tone.
"Alright, if you're certain." Jeb said.
"I am. We'll let you know if anything changes." The Trap Master replied.
"Alright, have it your way." Jeb returned and departed while tossing the conjured apple towards the lazing salamanders nearby.
Jeb ported down to the main gathering area. The place was just as busy as when he left as the kobolds went about their duties and tasks with vigor and joy that he's only really seen when they were staying in his basement. Guess he was the one living in their basement now, he thought with a chuckle.
He played with the gold and garnet band as he shuffled nervously. Wasn't sure why he was so nervous, he thought. She already had his kids, kinda, sorta. They were already living together. This would just be the natural progression of things. Kinda, sorta. He heaved in a big gulp of air to steady his nerves.
"Alright. Quite procrastinatin' Jeb." He muttered to himself and started down the tunnel towards his home.
He stopped when his boot stepped on something different. He looked down and picked up a magazine page.
"Modern courtin' for the modern woman? Where the hell did this come from?"
Probably Sammy's, Jeb thought as he tossed aside the girly garbage. Not sure what it was doing out here though. Maybe she brought it for Thanksgiving and forgot it? Or maybe the kobolds swiped it when they raided her hairspray? Or maybe she just left it among his other articles one of the times she and his pa would go over to his place.
"Oh well." He said as he continued on.
He could hear humming as he got closer, and saw a familiar pale blue light. He walked into his room and saw Ruby humming as she tinkered with something. Nearby was their eggs, sitting in the balefire. He should've panicked. He should've dropped everything and ran over trying to save his kids. That's what a father would do right?
But he didn't have that gut wrenching feeling of seeing your kids in danger he thought he would. Still, he walked over beside Ruby. She yelped in surprise and fumbled with what she was working on as Jeb reached out a hand and touched their onyx colored eggs.
"Jeb?! I was- They were-" Ruby tried to explain while also trying to gather her things.
"It's alright." Jeb said.
"It is?" She asked with concern.
"Yeah. They're not hot." He said as he stroked the shells through the fire that did nothing to him.
"Are you sure?" She asked with worry and concern.
"Yeah. Doubt it'll do anythin' more to 'em." Jeb said with a bit more bitterness in his voice than he wanted there to be.
He saw Ruby's face fall at his words. Nice job dickhead, Jeb thought to himself. He sighed and turned towards Ruby.
"I'm sorry. I'm just nervous 'bout everythin' happenin'."
"I'm nervous too." She stated and leaned into him for a hug, which he eagerly returned.
They held each other for a long moment before Ruby perked up and scrambled away.
"Hold on! Don't look!"
"Look at what?" Jeb asked with a cocked brow as he did his best to hide his own gift.
"I said don't look!" She chided.
"Alright!" He said with a laugh.
He turned away as he heard her grumbling and fumbling with whatever she was working on when he walked in on her. While he waited, he stretched out his hand and caressed their eggs. Please don't get any weirder, he pleaded mentally while he waited.
"Ok! You can look now!" Ruby called at last.
Jeb turned back around and saw Ruby holding a ring towards him. It was some braided copper wire with a couple of small pearls threaded on. She held it up to him.
"What do you think?"
Wait, was this a gift or was she asking him to marry her, Jeb thought. He had to say something though, the look of confusion on his face was making Ruby sad.
"I love it! What's it for exactly?"
"Well, I'm courting you!" She said as Jeb accepted the copper and pearl braided band.
"Courtin' me? What does that-" Jeb started when he noticed a rustle from his left boot.
He looked down and pulled off a piece of paper that had stuck to it. MODERN COURTING FOR THE MODERN WOMAN, it said in bold on the paper. He turned it around towards Ruby.
"Did you read this?"
She shuffled.
"Yes? I wasn't sure how you court a human in this world! But the words were confusing and didn't make any sense and- why are you laughing?"
"I'm laughin' because this is trash! None of the stuff in here is how you should court someone!" Jeb said with a laugh.
"But it says-" Ruby started when Jeb tossed the magazine paper into the nearby fire, which ate it instantly.
"It's just somethin' that girls read to pass the time. Nothin' in there is worth the paper it's printed on." Jeb declared.
"Oh. So?" Ruby asked dejectedly as she gestured to the ring she made for Jeb.
"This is just fine. Though do you know what it means to get a ring for someone?" Jeb asked.
"That they love one another?" Ruby said a little unsure now.
"Yeah. I guess it does. But the act of givin' someone you love a ring is a symbol that you want to be together." Jeb explained and produced his own gift for Ruby.
Her eyes went wide as she grasped the gold and garnet band.
"But we're already together."
"Yeah. We are."
"So what does the rings mean?" Ruby asked as she examined the band.
"Well, it's more religious really."
"Oh?"
"Yeah. It's supposed to mean... somethin'." Jeb started as he realized he didn't entirely recall what the meaning of the ring was supposed to mean.
"Mean what?" Ruby pressed as she tried to fit the band on her arm and then her tail.
"Well. It generally means being together forever."
"But why the ring?"
"It means a sort of exclusivity for folk." Jeb explained.
"Why? What about the rest of the tribe? Does that mean you won't help them?" She asked.
"No! I can, or will, or... this is harder than I thought it'd be." Jeb said with a sigh.
Ruby cocked a brow as well.
"So what happens?"
"Well, we exchange rings and promise to love one another forever. In sickness and health and yada yada. Then we're husband and wife." Jeb explained.
"Why? We're already mates and we love one another. What does our health have to do with it? And what is a 'husband and wife'?"
"Well... You know what? Forget it. Do you promise to love me?"
"Yes! Do you?"
"Yup!"
"Yay!" Ruby cried and hugged Jeb.
"And I now pronounce you man and wife." Jeb muttered as he kissed Ruby.
Ruby giggled and pulled away.
"So what happens now?"
"Now... I don't know. Usually there would also be paper work, but given... us, it prob'bly wouldn't matter."
"So what changes?" Ruby asked as she affixed the gold and garnet band to one of her horns with a smile.
"Uhm... nothin'? We're already together, we already live together, we already have kids... kinda." Jeb listed off.
"So what's the rings supposed to mean?"
"It means... I love you." Jeb replied at last, giving up on trying to explain something he himself wasn't entirely informed of.
"I love you too!" Ruby cried and kissed him.
He returned the kiss. Not like this would've been an official wedding anyway, Jeb thought. They don't exactly have a licensed priest to officiate it. Or witnesses. He doubt their still shelled eggs would count. He could ask the Chief to oversee it. But he already got a headache trying to explain marriage to Ruby, he didn't really want to explain it to the Chief, or any other kobolds that might be interested.
Not like it made anything different, Jeb thought. Ruby was right. They loved one another. They lived together. They had kids together. For all intense and purpose, they were mates. Sure if he was particularly religious he could insist on going to a church and doing things official. But given how things have turned out for them lately, he wouldn't be surprised if he burst into flames stepping inside a church.
Well, there was ONE tradition that they could still do, Jeb thought with a smirk as he picked up Ruby bridal style.
"Wanna consummate our marriage?"
"What does that mean?" She asked.
"Don't worry. You'll like it." Jeb said as he led her over to their moss bed.
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2024.05.16 00:10 SrimatiDasi The Grace of the Master
A devotee of Paramahamsa Vishwananda who is coming whenever possible to Germany to the Ashram with her little son, shared as following:
She herself met Paramahamsa Vishwananda in 2016 physically. But she could not see his body, she only saw light.:
“I felt that He was the love that I was looking for since childhood. The parents cannot love the same way. They take care for us. But when we are naughty, they have enough of us. When we are not doing what they want from us in society, then we can feel it is not love, just expectation of how to behave, how to be, how we should live. I remember when I met Guruji my full body was just crying. It was reconnection to that love what was I wondering if it exists… I was looking at life; with a partner it is not love. There were expectations of the body and how to behave as woman. Guruji brought life and colors into my life and a big sense. Sometimes I feel He is giving, giving, giving. I just feel I don’t love Him enough. We will never be loving enough. He was showing me completely to change the way I was living, to always turn inside, being grateful for what we have. When He showed me step by step how to live, there is no way back and it is so beautiful. It just beyond words. It is nourishing everything. Finally, everything is nourished: my body, my soul. Before I was always lacking, not having enough. I was always waiting of I don’t know what. Always waiting and waiting. Waiting for something better, waiting for something, for adventures. And now it is only waiting for God to come. Guruji is such a help.”
A year ago, Guruji told her to read every day a little bit Bhagavad Gita to her 3-year-old son. And he changed. Since he is born, he had so many health issues. Guruji healed him several times, the same with herself. Any situation Guruji is there, when facing the world, facing challenges.
When she asked her son how Guruji changed his life. His answer:” Without Guruji there are only desires. With Guruji there is only one desire to be with Him”.
Her 4-year-old son told her, that she should not ask Guruji for anything as it means, that she doesn’t trust Him. She should only chant the divine name.
Guruji is teaching her son in dreams. Sometimes he wakes up and he is chanting mantras, that she doesn’t even now.
Her son was very angry in school as the teacher forbid him to speak about God. He prayed to Guruji’s picture and later again to take all his anger and karma. Then Guruji told him in the dream to chant Om Namo Narayana.
Her son noticed that he cannot speak everywhere about God, but he realizes at the same time how fortunate he is to have Guruji and a mother who shares the same path.
For his 4th birthday she offered him to do a puja to Guruji and he joyfully accepted. During the puja with the sangha his focus seemed to be somewhere else as he didn’t participate. Later at night his mother asked him how it was. He told her that all around him was disappearing and only Guruji was there. He realized that Guruji is in his heart.
Paramahamsa Vishwananda doesn’t want anyone to believe blindly. Therefore, He provides experiences. This little boy as well as his mother hasve already so many experiences that easily fill a book.
When hearing these accounts, I found them very touching and inspiring. It is a reminder to follow what we are here for, to be grateful for what we have been provided with and mostly the importance and the grace of a master.
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She herself met Paramahamsa Vishwananda in 2016 physically. But she could not see his body, she only saw light.:
“I felt that He was the love that I was looking for since childhood. The parents cannot love the same way. They take care for us. But when we are naughty, they have enough of us. When we are not doing what they want from us in society, then we can feel it is not love, just expectation of how to behave, how to be, how we should live. I remember when I met Guruji my full body was just crying. It was reconnection to that love what was I wondering if it exists… I was looking at life; with a partner it is not love. There were expectations of the body and how to behave as woman. Guruji brought life and colors into my life and a big sense. Sometimes I feel He is giving, giving, giving. I just feel I don’t love Him enough. We will never be loving enough. He was showing me completely to change the way I was living, to always turn inside, being grateful for what we have. When He showed me step by step how to live, there is no way back and it is so beautiful. It just beyond words. It is nourishing everything. Finally, everything is nourished: my body, my soul. Before I was always lacking, not having enough. I was always waiting of I don’t know what. Always waiting and waiting. Waiting for something better, waiting for something, for adventures. And now it is only waiting for God to come. Guruji is such a help.”
A year ago, Guruji told her to read every day a little bit Bhagavad Gita to her 3-year-old son. And he changed. Since he is born, he had so many health issues. Guruji healed him several times, the same with herself. Any situation Guruji is there, when facing the world, facing challenges.
When she asked her son how Guruji changed his life. His answer:” Without Guruji there are only desires. With Guruji there is only one desire to be with Him”.
Her 4-year-old son told her, that she should not ask Guruji for anything as it means, that she doesn’t trust Him. She should only chant the divine name.
Guruji is teaching her son in dreams. Sometimes he wakes up and he is chanting mantras, that she doesn’t even now.
Her son was very angry in school as the teacher forbid him to speak about God. He prayed to Guruji’s picture and later again to take all his anger and karma. Then Guruji told him in the dream to chant Om Namo Narayana.
Her son noticed that he cannot speak everywhere about God, but he realizes at the same time how fortunate he is to have Guruji and a mother who shares the same path.
For his 4th birthday she offered him to do a puja to Guruji and he joyfully accepted. During the puja with the sangha his focus seemed to be somewhere else as he didn’t participate. Later at night his mother asked him how it was. He told her that all around him was disappearing and only Guruji was there. He realized that Guruji is in his heart.
Paramahamsa Vishwananda doesn’t want anyone to believe blindly. Therefore, He provides experiences. This little boy as well as his mother hasve already so many experiences that easily fill a book.
When hearing these accounts, I found them very touching and inspiring. It is a reminder to follow what we are here for, to be grateful for what we have been provided with and mostly the importance and the grace of a master.
2024.05.16 00:05 MistyRain006 Please help
Please, I just need advice. My home is by no means a bad place at all, but I just can’t remain living here. I have absolutely no where else to go because I still rely on my mom to take me everywhere, including my place of work. I’m trying to get a bike but things just keep popping up. I 100% need to buy from a reliable brand, such as Fuji, because I have to bike to college everyday starting August, which is nearly an hour away. My mom wants me to buy clothes for a trip to Europe I payed off during my senior year, and that would be nice, but I just can’t afford much anymore. But onto the context behind the advice I need: When I was 14, I wanted a kitten more than anything. I was really isolated then and did everything possible to get one, even things I’m not proud of. Eventually I did end up going to the shelter to get a kitten, but there weren’t any available and I ended up taking a puppy home. I loved this puppy. He still is my baby. He was 2 months old when I got him. At the time, my dad was living with my family and he was extremely abusive. My dog would never leave my side because I was so scared something would happen to him, so scared he would nip my dad and cause my father would lose it, but there wasn’t anything I could do. My fears came true when puppy started pissing everytime he saw my dad. When he was around 3 1/2 months old, my parents got divorced. My father couldn’t handle it and forced my siblings and I to go with him to Alabama in his small truck. I was devastated when I couldn’t bring my puppy. My mom promised to take care of him. She promised. After about a month in, my dad decided to make a trip to Ohio without anyone knowing to see my mom, but I caught him leaving at 7:00 a.m. and that’s how I ended up going back with him. A little background info, we had three other animals (2 other dogs, and a cat). As we were arriving, I saw that none of our lights were on, which was already a red flag as the kitchen light above the sink was ALWAYS on. I already had a sinking feeling in my stomach that something was wrong. All of the doors were locked and my mom’s car wasn’t in the driveway. I stood on my dad’s shoulders as I used a shovel to pry a low window open, climb in, and unlock the front door for my dad. I focused on unlocking the door and didn’t bother turning on the lights, but our Great Dane (the oldest of the three dogs) met me in her excitement. When he got in, we turned on the lights and it was horrible. 2 emaciated puppies in a cage filled with shit, crying to be let out. Shit all over the bottom floor of our house. I let the puppies out and ran upstairs to find that out cat didn’t have any food or water, mind you she was 8 at the time. We actually just ended up putting her down at 12 around 2 weeks ago. Well, all of this was just the beginning. It left my dog with severe food aggression. The first experience I handled was when I accidentally dropped a piece of chicken at the top of the stairs and when I was reaching to get it from me dog, he went ballistic and attacked my hand. I’d cry over that for a long time, but I wouldn’t give up on him. He ran away constantly. Bit. And did a lot more that would make him a “bad dog,” but he wasn’t ever a bad dog. He really wasn’t. That same night I found our animals, I had no choice but to go back to Alabama. My dad didn’t care. I begged to stay, but at the end of the day, my siblings were still in another state alone. I called my mom, who didn’t know we were in Ohio, crying, asking why she’s been lying to me about being home. She’d sent pictures to prove she was there, but I knew she wasnt. We all came back that next day after being kicked out of our aunt’s place. Fast forward a few weeks, we move in a trailer park around an hour and 1/2 away from my original home. We obviously brought my puppy, but we also brought my mom’s Great Dane. My mom was gone before I left school to work. I was alone with both of these dogs everyday and it was hard. Hard to walk either dog, both of which weren’t trained. My puppy was my priority. I could get into a lot more, but fast forward a few years, and I’m 18 now. My dog is doing great. My mom selfishly got a husky puppy 3 days after we put our cat down, and it’s making it hard on my dog. Her new husky bites him relentlessly and won’t get out of my dog’s face. The Great Dane hasn’t been here for a few years now, because my dad ended up moving in with us briefly and let her outside to go potty without a leash attached and she ended up biting a dog. She was sent to live on an actual farm, and she’s thriving. But that means my dogs been alone for years as the only dog. Aside from being great, his biggest issue is recourse guarding. There has been a single “fight” but it was quickly split up and hasn’t happened again (mainly because I keep the dogs separated, which pisses off my mom). As I was saying earlier, I can’t handle living here anymore. The fighting is constant and I just don’t think I can forgive her for anything. My uncle who is now living with us is truly a piece of shit. I don’t want to see my dog go back down the whole. For the first few years of his life, my mom wouldn’t help with anything. She told me I couldn’t go anywhere, that it wasn’t her job to watch him. Ever. My sister willing watches him all the time, but my mom will still get onto me about it not being her job. Recently, though my father is shitty, I went to stay with him because he was offering to give me $100 for my grad. Ceremony (and I needed the money). I told my mom that my dog couldn’t go, because I promised myself I’d never put my dog in danger again. I love him more than anything, but I don’t know how long I can do this. All of this. I refuse to get rid of him, part not being able to and part being selfish. I don’t know what I’ll do when college starts and I can’t afford a bike, meaning I can’t go full time to eventually get my own place. My only dream was to live with my dog, in a place of our own that we could call home, but that dream is getting more distant by the day. I don’t want to cry anymore. I don’t want years of this hopelessness. I want to get myself out of this bad situation. But I don’t have anyone.
submitted by MistyRain006 to DogAdvice [link] [comments]
2024.05.16 00:05 Dancing_Penguin22 Book choices influenced by songs I listen to😭
Whenever I listen to Lana Del Rey's songs,I imagine myself falling hopelessly in love with an older man who treats me like shit. He's toxic, manipulative,sweet tongued and every woman's wet dream and I strive for an iota of his love and affection. He gives me the best sex of my life,he teaches me how to smoke by putting the cigarette on my lip, calling me a good little girl while watching me learn how to inhale and says “You take it so good for me"🤭 I imagine him spoiling me with expensive gifts because he obviously comes from old money. But the downside is his tendency to make me feel worthless and how he always hangs around the other woman just to make me feel jealous. (Listening to sad girl makes me feel this way😭)
Melanie Martinez songs makes me imagine myself falling for a freak. A scenerio where I'm stalked by a creepy clown is always on my mind whenever I listen to her song (Carousel) and her song (teachers pet)gives me the mental picture of me falling for my ‘off limit' math teacher. He doesn't want me the way I want him,but he can't help but be seduced by my innocent allure🤭
Amy Winehouse's song (back to black) makes me see myself as a powerful heiress, planning revenge against my cheating husband while being the femme fatale and villain of the story.
The song (you don't own me by Lesley Gore)I see myself as Harley Quinn in a way😂I'm called for a mission that involves getting Intel on a dangerous, ruthless mafia don. And when he finds out and captures me, he's stunned by how fearless I am,how casual and funny I act even in the face of death and it makes him take a very dark interest in me.
Listening to Billie Eillish songs makes me imagine that I have a toxic boyfriend but I can't seem to bring myself to leave the relationship because I'm drowning in our messed up love.
I just felt like sharing this because I love this community and how everyone's open to whatever discussion. I know everyone has songs that also influence their book choices or makes them imagine scenerios similar to books they enjoy 😅I would like to hear yours
Thanks 🤍
submitted by Dancing_Penguin22 to DarkRomance [link] [comments]
Melanie Martinez songs makes me imagine myself falling for a freak. A scenerio where I'm stalked by a creepy clown is always on my mind whenever I listen to her song (Carousel) and her song (teachers pet)gives me the mental picture of me falling for my ‘off limit' math teacher. He doesn't want me the way I want him,but he can't help but be seduced by my innocent allure🤭
Amy Winehouse's song (back to black) makes me see myself as a powerful heiress, planning revenge against my cheating husband while being the femme fatale and villain of the story.
The song (you don't own me by Lesley Gore)I see myself as Harley Quinn in a way😂I'm called for a mission that involves getting Intel on a dangerous, ruthless mafia don. And when he finds out and captures me, he's stunned by how fearless I am,how casual and funny I act even in the face of death and it makes him take a very dark interest in me.
Listening to Billie Eillish songs makes me imagine that I have a toxic boyfriend but I can't seem to bring myself to leave the relationship because I'm drowning in our messed up love.
I just felt like sharing this because I love this community and how everyone's open to whatever discussion. I know everyone has songs that also influence their book choices or makes them imagine scenerios similar to books they enjoy 😅I would like to hear yours
Thanks 🤍
2024.05.16 00:03 Professional-Nerd25 26/M UK/Europe - Cuddly nerd looking for a long term thing with someone cool!
Hey!
I've been single for 6 years and I've decided to do something about it! I've tried a couple of dating apps in the past and quite frankly they suck. I've posted on here a lot over the last few years and met some cool, and some not so cool, people so now here I am rewriting my post again to see who else is around!
I'm 26 and from South East England. Physically, I'm fat (cuddly 😛) I've got short brown hair, blue/greyish eyes, a nose, 2 arms, 2 legs, and all that usual stuff. I'm also 6'3 so if you fancy sitting on my shoulders and seeing what the weather's like up here then I'm definitely up for it! I'm pretty strong as well so even if you're "cuddly" I'll still most likely be able to get you up there 💪 I wouldn't say no to you doing the same for me either, but there's a 110% chance you'll be crushed if you try so I'll definitely have to make you sign a waiver or something 😛
Pictures are available on request, although if you're the type to ghost immediately after seeing my face then I will spend the evening sad in bed so don't do that 😒
Personality wise, I'm pretty shy and quiet in person until I get to know someone well. The MBTI test says I'm an INTJ and the description seems to fit fairly well, although it also says I have the same personality as Gandalf so I guess it could definitely be worse. Relationship wise I can be quite dorky and weird when I'm with someone I know well enough. I'm also a massive fan of cuddles so hopefully you like them as much as me!
In my free time, I do quite a lot of gaming, although not as much as I used to. I've got a massive box of films and TV shows that I'm gradually working my way through. It's mostly horror and sci-fi films at the moment, and I could definitely do with someone else to cuddle up and watch them with! I'm also into Warhammer 40k, but I haven't built or painted anything for ages so I've mostly got a cabinet full of grey plastic at the moment... I would like to do some travelling to tick things off my bucket list, but travelling alone is never as much fun as having someone to go with! I'm currently looking into a trip to Svalbard, but a lot of the activities have a minimum of two people so it'd be even less fun to travel there alone!
For other discussion topics, I've got a soft spot for anything paranormal or conspiracy theory related, anything science related, or pretty much anything else you can think of!
So who am I looking for? Well;
submitted by Professional-Nerd25 to MeetNewPeopleHere [link] [comments]
I've been single for 6 years and I've decided to do something about it! I've tried a couple of dating apps in the past and quite frankly they suck. I've posted on here a lot over the last few years and met some cool, and some not so cool, people so now here I am rewriting my post again to see who else is around!
I'm 26 and from South East England. Physically, I'm fat (cuddly 😛) I've got short brown hair, blue/greyish eyes, a nose, 2 arms, 2 legs, and all that usual stuff. I'm also 6'3 so if you fancy sitting on my shoulders and seeing what the weather's like up here then I'm definitely up for it! I'm pretty strong as well so even if you're "cuddly" I'll still most likely be able to get you up there 💪 I wouldn't say no to you doing the same for me either, but there's a 110% chance you'll be crushed if you try so I'll definitely have to make you sign a waiver or something 😛
Pictures are available on request, although if you're the type to ghost immediately after seeing my face then I will spend the evening sad in bed so don't do that 😒
Personality wise, I'm pretty shy and quiet in person until I get to know someone well. The MBTI test says I'm an INTJ and the description seems to fit fairly well, although it also says I have the same personality as Gandalf so I guess it could definitely be worse. Relationship wise I can be quite dorky and weird when I'm with someone I know well enough. I'm also a massive fan of cuddles so hopefully you like them as much as me!
In my free time, I do quite a lot of gaming, although not as much as I used to. I've got a massive box of films and TV shows that I'm gradually working my way through. It's mostly horror and sci-fi films at the moment, and I could definitely do with someone else to cuddle up and watch them with! I'm also into Warhammer 40k, but I haven't built or painted anything for ages so I've mostly got a cabinet full of grey plastic at the moment... I would like to do some travelling to tick things off my bucket list, but travelling alone is never as much fun as having someone to go with! I'm currently looking into a trip to Svalbard, but a lot of the activities have a minimum of two people so it'd be even less fun to travel there alone!
For other discussion topics, I've got a soft spot for anything paranormal or conspiracy theory related, anything science related, or pretty much anything else you can think of!
So who am I looking for? Well;
- Preferably someone in the UK (especially down in the South East), I can drive so basically anywhere in the country is fairly easy to get to.
- I don't mind if you're from abroad, but please speak good English, and preferably be from somewhere with not too big of a time zone difference, unless you're awake at odd hours of course!
- Physically I don't really have a "type". Anything from normal up to thicc with 5 c's is fine by me. I'm totally not bothered by height, even if somehow you're taller than me. I would say I have a thing for more "alt" types though so if that's you then you should definitely message! (Although you totally should even if you're not).
- Overall I'm just looking for someone kind, caring, and non-judgemental who actually wants to talk to and spend time with me as much as I want to talk to and spend time with them.
2024.05.16 00:03 Professional-Nerd25 26 [M4F] UK/Europe - Cuddly nerd looking for a long term thing with someone cool!
Hey!
I've been single for 6 years and I've decided to do something about it! I've tried a couple of dating apps in the past and quite frankly they suck. I've posted on here a lot over the last few years and met some cool, and some not so cool, people so now here I am rewriting my post again to see who else is around!
I'm 26 and from South East England. Physically, I'm fat (cuddly 😛) I've got short brown hair, blue/greyish eyes, a nose, 2 arms, 2 legs, and all that usual stuff. I'm also 6'3 so if you fancy sitting on my shoulders and seeing what the weather's like up here then I'm definitely up for it! I'm pretty strong as well so even if you're "cuddly" I'll still most likely be able to get you up there 💪 I wouldn't say no to you doing the same for me either, but there's a 110% chance you'll be crushed if you try so I'll definitely have to make you sign a waiver or something 😛
Pictures are available on request, although if you're the type to ghost immediately after seeing my face then I will spend the evening sad in bed so don't do that 😒
Personality wise, I'm pretty shy and quiet in person until I get to know someone well. The MBTI test says I'm an INTJ and the description seems to fit fairly well, although it also says I have the same personality as Gandalf so I guess it could definitely be worse. Relationship wise I can be quite dorky and weird when I'm with someone I know well enough. I'm also a massive fan of cuddles so hopefully you like them as much as me!
In my free time, I do quite a lot of gaming, although not as much as I used to. I've got a massive box of films and TV shows that I'm gradually working my way through. It's mostly horror and sci-fi films at the moment, and I could definitely do with someone else to cuddle up and watch them with! I'm also into Warhammer 40k, but I haven't built or painted anything for ages so I've mostly got a cabinet full of grey plastic at the moment... I would like to do some travelling to tick things off my bucket list, but travelling alone is never as much fun as having someone to go with! I'm currently looking into a trip to Svalbard, but a lot of the activities have a minimum of two people so it'd be even less fun to travel there alone!
For other discussion topics, I've got a soft spot for anything paranormal or conspiracy theory related, anything science related, or pretty much anything else you can think of!
So who am I looking for? Well;
submitted by Professional-Nerd25 to r4r [link] [comments]
I've been single for 6 years and I've decided to do something about it! I've tried a couple of dating apps in the past and quite frankly they suck. I've posted on here a lot over the last few years and met some cool, and some not so cool, people so now here I am rewriting my post again to see who else is around!
I'm 26 and from South East England. Physically, I'm fat (cuddly 😛) I've got short brown hair, blue/greyish eyes, a nose, 2 arms, 2 legs, and all that usual stuff. I'm also 6'3 so if you fancy sitting on my shoulders and seeing what the weather's like up here then I'm definitely up for it! I'm pretty strong as well so even if you're "cuddly" I'll still most likely be able to get you up there 💪 I wouldn't say no to you doing the same for me either, but there's a 110% chance you'll be crushed if you try so I'll definitely have to make you sign a waiver or something 😛
Pictures are available on request, although if you're the type to ghost immediately after seeing my face then I will spend the evening sad in bed so don't do that 😒
Personality wise, I'm pretty shy and quiet in person until I get to know someone well. The MBTI test says I'm an INTJ and the description seems to fit fairly well, although it also says I have the same personality as Gandalf so I guess it could definitely be worse. Relationship wise I can be quite dorky and weird when I'm with someone I know well enough. I'm also a massive fan of cuddles so hopefully you like them as much as me!
In my free time, I do quite a lot of gaming, although not as much as I used to. I've got a massive box of films and TV shows that I'm gradually working my way through. It's mostly horror and sci-fi films at the moment, and I could definitely do with someone else to cuddle up and watch them with! I'm also into Warhammer 40k, but I haven't built or painted anything for ages so I've mostly got a cabinet full of grey plastic at the moment... I would like to do some travelling to tick things off my bucket list, but travelling alone is never as much fun as having someone to go with! I'm currently looking into a trip to Svalbard, but a lot of the activities have a minimum of two people so it'd be even less fun to travel there alone!
For other discussion topics, I've got a soft spot for anything paranormal or conspiracy theory related, anything science related, or pretty much anything else you can think of!
So who am I looking for? Well;
- Preferably someone in the UK (especially down in the South East), I can drive so basically anywhere in the country is fairly easy to get to.
- I don't mind if you're from abroad, but please speak good English, and preferably be from somewhere with not too big of a time zone difference, unless you're awake at odd hours of course!
- Physically I don't really have a "type". Anything from normal up to thicc with 5 c's is fine by me. I'm totally not bothered by height, even if somehow you're taller than me. I would say I have a thing for more "alt" types though so if that's you then you should definitely message! (Although you totally should even if you're not).
- Overall I'm just looking for someone kind, caring, and non-judgemental who actually wants to talk to and spend time with me as much as I want to talk to and spend time with them.
2024.05.15 23:59 SrimatiDasi The Grace of the Master
A devotee of Paramahamsa Vishwananda who is coming whenever possible to Germany to the Ashram with her little son, shared as following:
She herself met Paramahamsa Vishwananda in 2016 physically. But she could not see his body, she only saw light.:
“I felt that He was the love that I was looking for since childhood. The parents cannot love the same way. They take care for us. But when we are naughty, they have enough of us. When we are not doing what they want from us in society, then we can feel it is not love, just expectation of how to behave, how to be, how we should live. I remember when I met Guruji my full body was just crying. It was reconnection to that love what was I wondering if it exists… I was looking at life; with a partner it is not love. There were expectations of the body and how to behave as woman. Guruji brought life and colors into my life and a big sense. Sometimes I feel He is giving, giving, giving. I just feel I don’t love Him enough. We will never be loving enough. He was showing me completely to change the way I was living, to always turn inside, being grateful for what we have. When He showed me step by step how to live, there is no way back and it is so beautiful. It just beyond words. It is nourishing everything. Finally, everything is nourished: my body, my soul. Before I was always lacking, not having enough. I was always waiting of I don’t know what. Always waiting and waiting. Waiting for something better, waiting for something, for adventures. And now it is only waiting for God to come. Guruji is such a help.”
A year ago, Guruji told her to read every day a little bit Bhagavad Gita to her 3-year-old son. And he changed. Since he is born, he had so many health issues. Guruji healed him several times, the same with herself. Any situation Guruji is there, when facing the world, facing challenges.
When she asked her son how Guruji changed his life. His answer:” Without Guruji there are only desires. With Guruji there is only one desire to be with Him”.
Her 4-year-old son told her, that she should not ask Guruji for anything as it means, that she doesn’t trust Him. She should only chant the divine name.
Guruji is teaching her son in dreams. Sometimes he wakes up and he is chanting mantras, that she doesn’t even now.
Her son was very angry in school as the teacher forbid him to speak about God. He prayed to Guruji’s picture and later again to take all his anger and karma. Then Guruji told him in the dream to chant Om Namo Narayana.
Her son noticed that he cannot speak everywhere about God, but he realizes at the same time how fortunate he is to have Guruji and a mother who shares the same path.
For his 4th birthday she offered him to do a puja to Guruji and he joyfully accepted. During the puja with the sangha his focus seemed to be somewhere else as he didn’t participate. Later at night his mother asked him how it was. He told her that all around him was disappearing and only Guruji was there. He realized that Guruji is in his heart.
Paramahamsa Vishwananda doesn’t want anyone to believe blindly. Therefore, He provides experiences. This little boy as well as his mother hasve already so many experiences that easily fill a book.
When hearing these accounts, I found them very touching and inspiring. It is a reminder to follow what we are here for, to be grateful for what we have been provided with and mostly the importance and the grace of a master.
submitted by SrimatiDasi to SriSwamiVishwananda [link] [comments]
She herself met Paramahamsa Vishwananda in 2016 physically. But she could not see his body, she only saw light.:
“I felt that He was the love that I was looking for since childhood. The parents cannot love the same way. They take care for us. But when we are naughty, they have enough of us. When we are not doing what they want from us in society, then we can feel it is not love, just expectation of how to behave, how to be, how we should live. I remember when I met Guruji my full body was just crying. It was reconnection to that love what was I wondering if it exists… I was looking at life; with a partner it is not love. There were expectations of the body and how to behave as woman. Guruji brought life and colors into my life and a big sense. Sometimes I feel He is giving, giving, giving. I just feel I don’t love Him enough. We will never be loving enough. He was showing me completely to change the way I was living, to always turn inside, being grateful for what we have. When He showed me step by step how to live, there is no way back and it is so beautiful. It just beyond words. It is nourishing everything. Finally, everything is nourished: my body, my soul. Before I was always lacking, not having enough. I was always waiting of I don’t know what. Always waiting and waiting. Waiting for something better, waiting for something, for adventures. And now it is only waiting for God to come. Guruji is such a help.”
A year ago, Guruji told her to read every day a little bit Bhagavad Gita to her 3-year-old son. And he changed. Since he is born, he had so many health issues. Guruji healed him several times, the same with herself. Any situation Guruji is there, when facing the world, facing challenges.
When she asked her son how Guruji changed his life. His answer:” Without Guruji there are only desires. With Guruji there is only one desire to be with Him”.
Her 4-year-old son told her, that she should not ask Guruji for anything as it means, that she doesn’t trust Him. She should only chant the divine name.
Guruji is teaching her son in dreams. Sometimes he wakes up and he is chanting mantras, that she doesn’t even now.
Her son was very angry in school as the teacher forbid him to speak about God. He prayed to Guruji’s picture and later again to take all his anger and karma. Then Guruji told him in the dream to chant Om Namo Narayana.
Her son noticed that he cannot speak everywhere about God, but he realizes at the same time how fortunate he is to have Guruji and a mother who shares the same path.
For his 4th birthday she offered him to do a puja to Guruji and he joyfully accepted. During the puja with the sangha his focus seemed to be somewhere else as he didn’t participate. Later at night his mother asked him how it was. He told her that all around him was disappearing and only Guruji was there. He realized that Guruji is in his heart.
Paramahamsa Vishwananda doesn’t want anyone to believe blindly. Therefore, He provides experiences. This little boy as well as his mother hasve already so many experiences that easily fill a book.
When hearing these accounts, I found them very touching and inspiring. It is a reminder to follow what we are here for, to be grateful for what we have been provided with and mostly the importance and the grace of a master.
2024.05.15 23:57 A_RandomTwin21 The times i have been called ugly
Some of these times may have been posted before but I’ll post some again just to get some feelings off my chest
Lots of times in high school. When i wasn’t massively ignored that is. Girls always were talking about how hot and cute my twin is and hearing them say "(my name’s) the ugly one” “ew GOD no, (my name) is ugly” “(my twin’s name) is the hot one, (my name is the ugly one” i heard this lots of times by many girls. My twin ALWAYS had girls around him in high school especially our senior year, his arms around them and girls always flirting with him and running their hands through his hair while i was pretty much ignored and invisible. And trust me i tried but always turned girls off with my face deformities and never could hold a conversation with a girl for more than a few minutes with how grossed out and uncomfortable they were
Facebook I have been called ugly on Facebook quite a number of times too, feeling only slightly confident to post a selfie only to get comments “WTF 💀” “what’s up, ugly?” “You’re a brave person” “ugly ass” and laugh reactions in the like section. Meanwhile my twin getting LOTS of likes and compliments about his facial features and hair and whatnot people commenting how pretty he looks and other stuff, meanwhile i post a picture once and a group of girls comment how i look like a "kiddie fiddler” laugh emojis tagging their friends who I’m not even friends with on Facebook “YOO HE LOOKS LIKE A PEDOPHILE” “what TF is wrong with his face 😭💀”
I was at a funeral a couple of years ago with my twin for the grandma of one of his friends, at the burial one of the uncles asked if we were twins, then pointed at me already laughing then saying "at least we know which one the ugly one is!” With a few people snickering and laughing lightly at it
At one of my twin’s work places about 6 years ago one of his co-workers wanted to meet me after my brother told him he has a twin, i met his friend for the first time, he looked at me and laughed uncontrollably saying (my twins name) you didn’t tell me he was ugly, damn!” And he didn’t wanna see me again after meeting me or even liked me immediately afterwards
There has been so much more times but that’s only a few i was able to list here, I might post more later
*Before anyone asks, my twin and i are identical
YES, im sure we’re identical. I’m 100% positive, confident that we’re identical
NO, im not going to send you a picture of myself, or myself and my twin side by side. I get this all the time Don’t even bother asking or messaging for it
submitted by A_RandomTwin21 to ugly [link] [comments]
Lots of times in high school. When i wasn’t massively ignored that is. Girls always were talking about how hot and cute my twin is and hearing them say "(my name’s) the ugly one” “ew GOD no, (my name) is ugly” “(my twin’s name) is the hot one, (my name is the ugly one” i heard this lots of times by many girls. My twin ALWAYS had girls around him in high school especially our senior year, his arms around them and girls always flirting with him and running their hands through his hair while i was pretty much ignored and invisible. And trust me i tried but always turned girls off with my face deformities and never could hold a conversation with a girl for more than a few minutes with how grossed out and uncomfortable they were
Facebook I have been called ugly on Facebook quite a number of times too, feeling only slightly confident to post a selfie only to get comments “WTF 💀” “what’s up, ugly?” “You’re a brave person” “ugly ass” and laugh reactions in the like section. Meanwhile my twin getting LOTS of likes and compliments about his facial features and hair and whatnot people commenting how pretty he looks and other stuff, meanwhile i post a picture once and a group of girls comment how i look like a "kiddie fiddler” laugh emojis tagging their friends who I’m not even friends with on Facebook “YOO HE LOOKS LIKE A PEDOPHILE” “what TF is wrong with his face 😭💀”
I was at a funeral a couple of years ago with my twin for the grandma of one of his friends, at the burial one of the uncles asked if we were twins, then pointed at me already laughing then saying "at least we know which one the ugly one is!” With a few people snickering and laughing lightly at it
At one of my twin’s work places about 6 years ago one of his co-workers wanted to meet me after my brother told him he has a twin, i met his friend for the first time, he looked at me and laughed uncontrollably saying (my twins name) you didn’t tell me he was ugly, damn!” And he didn’t wanna see me again after meeting me or even liked me immediately afterwards
There has been so much more times but that’s only a few i was able to list here, I might post more later
*Before anyone asks, my twin and i are identical
YES, im sure we’re identical. I’m 100% positive, confident that we’re identical
NO, im not going to send you a picture of myself, or myself and my twin side by side. I get this all the time Don’t even bother asking or messaging for it
2024.05.15 23:54 FigoludeLu Large square piece
 | Hi guys ! Just started resin print with a Anycubic photon 3 max. I want to print this model but I’m not sure about my strategy. I watch a ton of videos about printing functional/flat part and I was thinking that printing it flat would be the best option. submitted by FigoludeLu to AnycubicOfficial [link] [comments] At very first I printed the RERF and it appears that the number 4 was the best so I increased the exposure time from 3s to 4.25s. So for the first real try I printed the piece flat on the bed, top part against the bed with auto medium support : it stuck to the FEP at mid print and the top part (printed against the bed) was too melted like elephant foot with a lot of details missing. I filtered the resin, cleaned the vat, spray a bit of wd40 then swapped it, slightly send the metal bed and reset 0 z position, pushing a bit harder that the first time. For the second try I decided to print it top face slightly lifted from the bed and with a light angle (2.5) and auto fine supports. It successfully remain stick to the bed but at mid print the piece wrapping from the support. I’m not entirely happy with the 2.5 degrees angle because grooves are too visible but if had printed it a the « perfect angle » (around 48 °) the printing time goes from 2 hours to 7 hours. The pictures illustrates the second try. What could you suggest me to achieve it ? |
2024.05.15 23:53 shaneka69 CANCER ZODIAC - UNEXPECTED INCOME! TAROT READING MAY 2024
CANCER ZODIAC TAROT READING - UNEXPECTED INCOME MAY 2024
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2024.05.15 23:52 Astrodental3- I met a guy 10 years older to me (19 and 29) on Tumblr, February 2023 we texted a lot I doubted him because he wouldn’t show his face but we shared lots of nudes….
On February 2023 he messaged me on tumblr we texted a bit then we stopped eventually then one day mid March I was bored and was scrolling through my tumblr dms and his profile pic was nice so I texted him again he didn’t recognize because he thought I was not interested so he deleted our chats anyways, then we started texting and he wanted to see me more so we sent each others pictures and all his pictures seemed old like 2014-2016 idk
anyways we texted and we were getting to know each other and he made me feel so close to him. As we got closer he told me maybe I would fall in love with you and get married and stuff like that at first I didn’t send nudes then we kept texting and it was a bit weird he always wanted to see me idk if it’s a normal guy thing.
But after like 3-4 months of us texting I sent him nudes with no face and we did stuff but he always Refused to call/video calls or even voice messages. When I asked for voice messages he would send me videos of him talking I don’t know if I should believe him and the face pictures he sent me saying it’s him felt so not him but I had a dream about him once like I saw him and it was a different face, a face that fits his body.
I think I liked him too much I don’t know if it was love. During our times together we stopped talking/blocked multiple times around 4-5 times and last time I spoke to him was beginning of April I miss him but I feel he’s not completely honest but he tells me everything about his family and things he went through I loved that but there’s things he hides and always wants nudes I don’t know I’m just very confused now we are 20 and 30.
I need opinions about this and any advice everything is welcome I just wish to understand this situation openly from everyone else thank you
submitted by Astrodental3- to Advice [link] [comments]
anyways we texted and we were getting to know each other and he made me feel so close to him. As we got closer he told me maybe I would fall in love with you and get married and stuff like that at first I didn’t send nudes then we kept texting and it was a bit weird he always wanted to see me idk if it’s a normal guy thing.
But after like 3-4 months of us texting I sent him nudes with no face and we did stuff but he always Refused to call/video calls or even voice messages. When I asked for voice messages he would send me videos of him talking I don’t know if I should believe him and the face pictures he sent me saying it’s him felt so not him but I had a dream about him once like I saw him and it was a different face, a face that fits his body.
I think I liked him too much I don’t know if it was love. During our times together we stopped talking/blocked multiple times around 4-5 times and last time I spoke to him was beginning of April I miss him but I feel he’s not completely honest but he tells me everything about his family and things he went through I loved that but there’s things he hides and always wants nudes I don’t know I’m just very confused now we are 20 and 30.
I need opinions about this and any advice everything is welcome I just wish to understand this situation openly from everyone else thank you
2024.05.15 23:50 Super_Season_811 AITA for moving out when I turned 18?
I, (18F) moved in with my boyfriend (19M) a couple of months after I turned 18, and my parents were furious and hurt. There’s a lot to unpack with this one, so bear with me.
My parents (40F and 42M) are very religious and were somewhat strict while I was growing up. I have two younger brothers, one 17 and one 8 (this will be important later). For context, my father is a pastor at a local church and my parent’s religious beliefs are the reasoning behind most if not all of their actions. Growing up, I was never a stereotypical girl. I didn’t have many female friends and was usually not accepted in groups with guys as I was a girl and we were kids. I was extroverted as a child but due to being repeatedly rejected by kids my age, I became more introverted. I was a major nerd who loved superheroes and I wanted to play sports. Again, for context, the town I grew up in was very conservative and my parents are very conservative themselves. Girls liked girl things- even if they claimed that’s not how they felt, it’s how they acted. However, as a kid, I did not realize this. I played soccer and basketball growing up, regardless of how “weird” it made me because I didn’t think there was anything wrong with it. I was probably around 9 or 10 at this point. It was around this time my parents started having issues with my hobbies. I remember my parents trying to convince me to be a cheerleader because I would “like it more,” but I insisted on playing basketball. (This basketball/cheer program was through our church by the way). Because I was still young, they let it slide, but to this day I remember them being annoyed with it. This is also around the time dieting was introduced to me as well as calorie counting. I have always struggled with my weight and so has my mother, so they were very adamant on making sure I was being “healthy.” I didn’t understand it, but as a child, the only thing I was worried about was making my parents happy. A lot of discipline I received revolved around emotion. What I was doing was right or wrong and if I did something wrong, I felt terrible and awful and would often come crying to my parents about the mistakes I made, fearful of their disappointment and anger if they found things out themselves. They also made everything a moral dilemma- everything was about God and religion and as a kid, it really messed with my head. I would blame myself for everything that went wrong, seeing it as God’s punishment for my behavior. When I was 9, I went so far as to blame my grandmother’s death on myself because I was hanging out with boys instead of girls. This made me to be more of an introvert and my now anxiety disorder is much much worse.
About a year later, my parents sat down with me and my brother and told us they wanted to adopt. At first, I was very excited. I loved the idea of having another brother or sister. And I wouldn’t trade my 8 year old brother (let’s call him Scott) for anything, but adopting kids is part of what triggered a huge change in my parent’s behavior. Also- I had started getting older. I loved playing video games, watching cartoons and writing. However, these weren’t the things they wanted me to like I guess, because I started to feel their judgment become more clear and apparent as I got older. Now, I assume this is because as a kid, I just did what I was told, or my oddities were assumed to fade over time, but that is not the case anymore. Anyways, entering middle school, our family fostered a little girl, let’s call her Ally. A young woman in our church had told us that Ally’s family was out of the picture, and as her aunt, she couldn’t take her in as she was already a single mom and planned on adopting her brother, but couldn’t handle all three alone. So my family stepped in- however, we had come to find that her father was still in the picture and was actively fighting for custody. And Ally was a bit of a handful. My parents have admitted that they expected to swoop in, save a child from a hard life and be the heroes, and when things were harder than that they were very upset. Ally was about three- she remembered her mom (who was in jail i believe), her sisters, her grandma and grandpa, as well as her dad. She didn’t want our family, she wanted hers. She didn’t listen to my parents and rejected their parenting. This is what started to make my parents snap. I understand it was hard for them, but now that I’m older, I get it. She was a little girl who wanted her family. But they took her rejection very seriously and were constantly unhappy with her and made sure she knew it. Children not listening immediately was newer to them as my brother and I both did pretty much whatever they asked, and they did not take well to being told “no” by a child. 8 months after living with Ally, she was taken in by her grandparents to live with them and her sisters. The next day, my parents took my brother and I on a small trip. I’m not sure if it was to cheer us up or to celebrate. I was quite sad though- I had started to really care about Ally and had convinced myself that “God would take care of things” and I would have a sister. But I was angry- God took someone away from me and I was doing everything right. Why was he punishing me? Nothing made sense. Yet, only a year later, my parents were considering taking in another child. I wanted nothing to do with it- God had already taken one sibling away from me. I couldn’t do it again. In the end, I agreed and soon became attached to this little boy, who was two when we met him. This was Scott. I immediately became attached- and I love this kid more than I can describe- he’s my little brother and I would do anything for him.
This is where things start to go further downhill. Scott has a lot of trauma and mental issues, one of those issues being oppositional defiant disorder. That basically means that listening to any form of authority is near impossible for him, and causes him to lash out and act younger than he is. This is probably due to a number of reasons, as he was severely neglected and abused as an infant and his birth mother was on several different substances while pregnant with him, to the point where he was born high on several illegal drugs. He was left in a car seat for most of his infant life, so the back of his head is slightly flattened due to this. My parents are very obedient/disciplined-based parents, so his behavior rocked their world. In my opinion, the way they handled things with Scott was borderline abusive. There were several occasions where he would say he hated them (as young children do when they're mad) and they would flip. Telling him that if he didn’t want them that was fine. They didn’t need him. He could run back to his other parents, but his mom was in jail and his dad didn’t want him, so good luck with that. If we were in the car when this happened, they would threaten to leave him on the side of the road and good luck finding his way home. Once my mother literally pulled to the side of the road, placed him outside the car and started driving so he would “think they would leave him if his actions didn’t change,” but she turned around to get him. Because they would “never actually abandon or hurt him,” their actions were justified and perfectly fine. They would tell him he was acting like a baby when he started to cry and scream. “Little baby Scott, do you need a diaper?” Is how they would tease him when he became older, which just made his tantrums worse. They would tell him how disappointed they were with him and that he should be ashamed of himself and the way he acted because they gave him everything. They would call him, to his face, “an ungrateful manipulative piece of shit.” Because according to my parents, he could control his actions 100% and was choosing to act out to make their lives difficult. While I understand that this was hard for them, in my opinion, this in no way excuses their behavior. One time, Scott was crying and was upset (who knows why, but the kid had a lot of trauma and mental issues so it didn’t bother me too much), and my mother picked him up and put him in his room. She told him that every time he tried to leave his room, she would take away one of his stuffed animals. (He had several that he loved very much). Because this sounded so terrible to him, he ran after her trying to say it wasn’t fair. So she went into his room and took a stuffed animal. This cycle continued while he cried and begged for her to stop, because he just didn’t get it that she was going to keep doing this over and over and his trying to convince her was making it worse. Eventually, there were none left, and she told him if he didn’t stop crying she was going to throw them all away. I don’t remember what happened after that, but I do know that several of them were thrown away, if not at that time than others. There are many other instances of things like this and worse occurring, but we’d be here for a while if I tried to recount them all. Moving forwards to closer when I was moving out-
Now, several years later, when I turned sixteen, I had come to terms with the fact that I was bisexual. This went against everything my family was for, and I knew exactly how they viewed queer people. So, I started learning about different branches of Christianity and felt like I knew a God who loved me as I was and was happy in my decision to switch denominations. (My parents were baptists, and I wanted to be non-denominational). A few months after this, I decided to tell my parents the truth. I had done my best to give them hints, but I wanted to be honest with them because I trusted that they would love me and be there for me no matter what. When I told them I wanted to talk to them about something, they pushed and pressed and I had been trying to wait to talk to them until the next day. I had been seeing my high school counselor, and she suggested giving them a heads-up before springing that conversation up on them. However, after telling them to wait, they went through my phone and saw that I had researched different denominations and read different sermons on queer-accepting faith. They were livid. To be clear- I had a friend over while this was happening. We were watching a movie and joking about how I lost my phone and couldn’t show them this picture I wanted to. Then, I was called upstairs. I had apparently betrayed my parents and, “how could I do this to them, when I had someone over?” My father demanded I send my friend home, but my mother convinced him for one more hour. I was told not to tell my friend anything they had said and to act like things were fine, but I couldn’t. I went back downstairs where we were hanging out and started sobbing. I felt like my whole world was falling apart. Everything was over- and the people I thought would love me no matter what made me so afraid and sad, I was completely broken. My friend did their best to comfort me and even felt weary to leave me alone with my family but I told them I’d be okay, and asked that they update our friends about the situation. That night was hellish. So many conversations, them trying to understand what I felt, but not taking me particularly seriously either. That night turned into weeks of books, slideshows, conversations, and prayers. It felt like at-home conversion therapy. Eventually, I was given a choice “put my convictional flag in the ground or loose their trust.” As the petrified 16 year old, I chose to lie. I put my “flag” in the ground and did my best to, “earn back their trust” and repair their reputation that I had tarnished. The next couple months were a blur. I felt so terrible about myself. I didn’t know what I thought or believed and I became extremely hyper anxious and depressed. I had lost all sense of privacy and I did trust my parents further than I could toss them. My 17 year old brother (he was 14 at the time, let’s call him James) was 100% on board with my parents. My life felt like a living nightmare. My parents had it so that all my texts sent or received from my phone would go directly to theirs, so I couldn’t even confide in my friends without getting into trouble (which had happened and was how I found out that they did that because I deleted the texts immediately after sending/receiving things).. Everything felt like it was about me and how I needed to earn back their trust and how I was a terrible betrayer who they were not proud of in the slightest. I had gone to get a pixie cut (with their approval) and after they told me I was disgusting and repulsive and would never find a man to love me. I was heartbroken and felt so alone and unloved in my house, while I had to watch my younger brother be treated the way he was by my parents.
Luckily, I had a lot of friends and our school counselor who had been there for me through everything. They showered me with support and love and made sure I had a safe space to exist and truthfully I think they’re the only reason I didn’t do anything drastic and am still here today. It was hard though because James went to the same school as me and would tell my parents if I was with anyone he knew was queer or queer accepting. This caused me to be very very paranoid about who I was with, when, where, etc. Constantly covering my tracks, having an excuse set up and ready to bolt if I saw anyone I knew. What made things equally hard is that the church my father works at is quite big in our area. So if someone from our church or someone who knew my family saw me with anyone they labeled as “queer” or “gay,” they would tell my family as well. For the most part, I didn’t feel safe anywhere. I was constantly alert and on guard, even when I was asleep as my parents had woken me up before to confront me about someone I was friends with at school.
Fortunately for me, despite everything being such a mess, I am quite academically smart. I got a job the second I turned sixteen as I had heard the horror stories of queer kids being kicked out and wanted to be prepared. I had been saving money, taking college classes (we have a state program that pays for the classes while you’re in high school), and putting on a show for my family for quite some time. After saving some money, I paid my parents for an older car that they had paid off ten or so years ago. After my brother turned 16, he claimed it was too hard to share a car with me, so while I was away visiting a friend they bought him a car and told us that they expected each of us to pay them one thousand dollars before we graduated high school and that when we did so, they would sign over our respective cars to us. To be clear, I contributed to insurance and paid for my own gas, as well as contributing to my phone bill and money for food. Meanwhile, my brother had no job, and was constantly asking my parents for money to go out with friends. He had also taken up golfing, which as most people know is extremely expensive, and my parents funded everything. James had actually admitted to asking for more money than he needed and save the leftovers for whatever he wanted. I was also expected to chauffeur him to golf events and to get togethers with his friends, and my parents would in return give me some gas money. Another thing to note is that the only reason I was contributing to our phone bill is because James wanted unlimited data and my father said it was unreasonable unless we both contributed financially. I refused as I was trying to save money (as I would have with the car situation), however things per normal went James’s way. However, because he did not have a job, he was not expected to pay anything and would not be charged for the months and years that he did not contribute to. I did my best not to let these things get to me and to keep a level head. I paid my parents for the car because I already had over two thousand dollars saved as a seventeen year old high school student due to my hard work.
I focused on my classes and joined theater to help fill the hours in between school and work. I was much more active my sophomore year but when James also decided to join theater I retreated a bit as my once safe space to freely exist was no longer safe. I joined the stage crew but honestly that was also very enjoyable and lethargic for me and I enjoyed it a lot. Anyways, I was mostly a straight A student besides the stray Bs and one or two Cs (psychology and AP government screwed me over) and was working 15 or so hours a week. This is on top of my commitments to the church which were most of my Sundays and my Wednesday evenings. The funny thing is though- James missed more church than I ever did yet because my absence was because of work and not golf, I was the one consistently reprimanded for my lack of attendance and socialization whilst I was there. Yet because James could never do anything wrong and was a very extroverted person his lack of attendance wasn’t as serious as my own. I had one close friend through our church, let’s call her Grace (now 18F) and she actually knew about everything and was very supportive of me. I also had some other friends who really only showed up to church so I didn’t have to go through the torture alone which I don’t know if I could ever repay them for. Besides the people I was comfortable with though, I was pretty much a loner there and this heavily displeased my parents as it made them look bad and messed with their reputation. I never realized how much appearances meant to them until all of the shit that happened took place. As I mentioned before, our church is very conservative and traditional, and many sermons and lessons revolved around gender roles and the sinfulness of the world in terms fo the LGBTQ community. I consistently felt targeted because of my looks and my personality and stopped feeling comfortable there a very long time ago.
Now that more context is in place, fast forward to the end of my junior year. I had at this point finished all my high school requirements for graduation and was given an incredible opportunity to go to our local college full time for my senior year. I was very excited and happy because not only did it give me more freedom but it also meant I would get more than a year of my college education paid for by the state.
It was also around this time when I met my now boyfriend, let’s call him Dean. We were coworkers and had begun to get to know each other. We had a lot in common and while were different people personality wise, we enjoyed each other’s company quite a bit. By some miracle, I convinced my parents to allow me to hang out with him outside of work by claiming he was just a friend and saying that he was a Christian (which is by no means true). They were extremely skeptical but allowed us to hang out. We had an incredible time- and by the end of our first date he asked me to be his girlfriend which I happily accepted. I was so happy, but when I got home, things spiraled out of control. I told my parents about our time, and they were extremely unhappy as they felt fooled (which they were to be fair) and told me I was not allowed to see him ever again. I was devastated and they said a lot of very uncalled for things and but I understand why they were angry. To be clear, they knew I had a romantic interest in Dean and that this hangout was to see if we would be compatible partners and get to know each other better. They did not call it a date though because they weren’t comfortable with it, even if it was a date and they kinda knew it. So while they were on some level “fooled,” I feel that their anger and harshness wasn’t called for as they knew the intentions of our hanging out. The next morning my father demanded to see my phone. This is when I started to panic. You see, they had stop tracking my texts and I had openly flirted with Dean over text. Nothing that explicit and no photos of any kind. But the flirting would be enough for them to tear my world apart and I knew it. They had gone through my personal conversations before and made me feel terrible because of it and I refused to let them do it again. So I deleted everything. The entire conversation chain, I removed it from my phone 100%. My parents absolutely lost their shit. They had been manipulating and gaslighting me for years, doing anything and everything to keep their control and with my actions I showed them they couldn’t control me forever and things went very downhill. I lost all my privacy and was once again told how I had betrayed them and I was terrible and couldn’t be trusted. Again- I partially understand their anger here because I had directly disobeyed a command. But at the same time, I feel as a young woman I should be allowed some sense of privacy and the ability to talk to people without being constantly monitored. I don’t feel like I did anything wrong and would happily do it again in a heartbeat if it meant I’d be where I am today. Regardless of this, my life became a living hell once again, and my parents compared this to when I came out, “which was maybe the worst night of their lives.” They stripped me of all my privileges even if I didn’t have many to begin with. They made me feel absolutely miserable and awful about myself and I was monitored like never before. I would be working and receive texts upon texts of how I was so terrible and how could I do this to them because they had done everything for me and I’m a terrible daughter who should be ashamed of myself for the deceit and malicious nature of my actions. Again- this was because they could not read the messages between me and my now boyfriend. I understand them being mad but they took it to a completely inappropriate level. I shared everything happening with my friends and counselor and they supported me and assured me I did nothing wrong and they would be there for me which helped but as my home was now a living hellscape it was hard to hear it. I found a way to tell Dean about things and at first he felt guilty but I assured him that their actions were not his fault but theirs. He then asked me if I wanted to pause our relationship but I told him honestly that they had taken so many things I cared about over the years and I refused to let them take this. I did tell him however I understood if he didn’t want to put up with all the complicatedness of my family but he told me he cared for me and would be there so long as I was okay with it. He also told me if things ever got really bad at home, regardless of the fact we had just started dating, he had spoken to his family and they offered me a place to stay if I needed/wanted it. This really touched me, but I reassured him that it was not his job to offer that, but I appreciated the offer.
This begins our relationship and we were very happy. We had found a way to communicate over email, and we were able to hide our relationship with my family. Luckily for me, over the years I had made a habit of hanging out at the park by myself so it was not strange for me to head to the park for a couple of hours. There, I would leave my car and phone (my phone had a tracker on it) and Dean and I would hangout multiple times a week and it was heaven. At this point, we’ve only been dating for a year but I can admit without any doubt that I am in love with this man and he is in love with me. During the school year, it became easier for us to hang out in between classes as we both went to the same college (I am older for my year in school and he is younger, so he was a sophomore in college while I was a senior in high school. However, we are barely a year apart in age for anyone who is concerned). However, in order for us to communicate and hang out, I had to be extremely diligent and was consistently covering my tracks while “once again, earning my parents trust and repairing our relationship.” Because of course their actions were completely justified and I was the one in the wrong, per normal. Anyways, every day, I was editing search histories, erasing messages, and looking over my shoulder. Our church had a program on campus where Dean and I went to school, so being together in public was risky as my father’s friends and coworkers were always on campus and I knew I would be screwed if we were caught together. We had a couple of close calls over the months but it was all worth it because I hadn’t been that happy in years.
Now, to the day I left and why. You see, my parents' behavior towards Scott was becoming more aggressive and worse over time. They also had, in my opinion, a drinking problem. Considering they didn’t deny it when I called them out, they may agree. They would behave more hostile after several drinks and it was happening so consistently I was constantly walking on eggshells. Between the way they treated Scott, the way they treated me and the constant stress I was under trying to balance my life in fear of the repercussions, things became too much. When things weren’t going to shit, I was consistently expected to either babysit my brother and do chores while being a full time college student and working a part time job WHILE attending church multiple times a week and keeping up with my responsibilities as a senior. This is on top of the stress my parents' behavior caused, meanwhile James was expected to do almost nothing in comparison. Don’t get me wrong- he didn’t do anything, but he had almost no responsibilities outside of school and his extracurriculars which were exclusively funded by my parents. Yes he helped with dishes during the week and would keep his space tidy. But as my schedule became much more flexible due to my school schedule, my expectations around the house became much higher than his. Even though I paid 200 a month on gas, 50 a month for insurance and 50 a month for the phone bill, and he paid nothing for his car, insurance, phone, gas, nothing. So you would think he would be expected to help in the house more but no. Also, James’s behavior towards Scott mimicked my parents and so all babysitting responsibilities fell on me as they couldn’t be trusted alone together. I was rarely if ever paid for my cleaning or babysitting services as it was my responsibility as their eldest child. They would also consistently judge me for my weight, cloths, hair, hobbies, etc. Why did I think it was a good idea to get fast food? I clearly didn’t need it. They would “outfit check me” to make sure the outfits I wore were feminine enough because the way I look effected their reputation and I couldn’t be trusted. I was not allowed to cut my hair after their tantrum over it. As for my hobbies, I stopped playing sports in middle school as I am very short (currently 5 foot even) and was unable to keep up with my peers. However my interest in video games and cartoons wasn’t feminine enough and they proceeded to compare me to my best friend Grace because she was skinnier and liked more feminine things than I did which hurt a lot. Another thing for context, I have PCOS. It’s an endocrine disorder that heavily effects your metabolism and hormones, which in turn severely effected my weight, however my parents never acknowledged it and again made everything my fault. So from what I wore, what I ate, who I hung out with and what I enjoyed doing was constantly criticized, scrutinized and eventually controlled by my family for years. On top of everything else, I was done. I was 18, I had resaved the thousand I paid my family and knew I was at a place where I didn’t need them and was tired of being treated like shit. So I left.
The night I moved out was a total shit show. I had rallied Dean and my other friend, let’s call them Rita (18NB), and they helped me form a plan. When I returned home, Dean and Rita would be on their way. I would pack everything that belonged to me or I felt they would let me take, and prep the bags outside. After Rita arrived I went to try and explain to my parents that I would be leaving and explain calmly why. In a perfect world, we would have had a long deep talk, and things would have ended alright. That is far, far from what happened. They immediately starting screaming, and took my phone and car keys as both belonged to them, which I calmly handed over. Rita was there for emotional support, and put themselves between me and my parents as they got more angry and seemed to be turning aggressive. After that, my father called the police and claimed that there was an intruder in their home trying to take their child. Yeah. Complete bullshit- which to this day I’m surprised they were never charged with falsifying a 911 call. They screamed at Rita to get out of their home and was screaming that I was throwing away everything and I needed to reconsider. I ignored them and attempted to calmly walk out, and my parents attempted to barricade the doors while harassing Rita to leave. Because Rita is incredible and one of my closest friends now, they refused to leave without me which was very calming. While my parents were distracted yelling at them, I slipped out through the garage. My mother saw this and then grabbed me, attempting to drag me inside by my arm. Rita saw this and assisted me in getting her off me, and after doing so we continued to walk towards Dean’s car where he was waiting for us. He figured it would be best if my family didn’t see him for the time being as they would definitely lose their minds at seeing his face. My parents continued screaming and then the cops arrived. They were quite confused at first because they had been sent to deal with a potential kidnapping, only to see two grown adults throwing a tantrum because their adult child didn’t want to live with them anymore. That night was honestly so insane I could write three more pages about everything they said and did. The most notable events were first when my mother tried to explain to the police that because I was her child, she was allowed to put her hands on me, which they humorously informed her was not the case. The next was when James came home from theater rehearsal, to which my parents told them that I was abandoning our family. He was an emotional wreck through all of it, and to this day has told me that until I “fix” things with our parents he is not okay with having any form of relationship with me. Throughout all of this Scott was in his room, and I was allowed to give him one last hug before leaving. The final and most notable thing, was as the cops allowed my boyfriend, Rita and I to leave, my father threatened violence towards my boyfriend and accused him of "taking advantage of his underage daughter," which is just ridiculous as we are practically the same age, and anything we had done together was consensual and reserved for after I turned 18. Another thing my parents did was go through each bag I had packed and took everything they felt belonged to them, including the laptop provided to me by my high school, which they hilariously were made to give back to me several days later as it was not theirs and they had no right to take it. They tried claiming they were giving it to me out of the kindness of their hearts, but that bullshit meant nothing as after I informed the school of their behavior, the school assured me they would be made to give it back. Another thing they threatened to do as I left was pull me out of high school, which I was assured by the police they were not capable of doing as I was 18. The police were for the most part annoyed with my parents, tired of their bs and told me I seemed to be a capable young woman and wished me the best of luck. My parents had tried to ask the police to say I was mentally unstable for the time being so I wouldn’t be allowed to leave, as their “she’s still in high school” excuse didn’t do anything. You see, as my father is an influential church figure and had friends in the police force, he thought they would be on his side but was sorely mistaken as the chief told him they wouldn’t be doing him any favors. And with that, I was free.
My boyfriend's family has been nothing but unconditionally kind and supportive and have accepted me as part of their family which has been a huge blessing in all of this. I am in contact with my father’s sister and his father, my aunt and grandpa, and as I have expressed my unhappiness at home, they are supportive of me as well. However, as my aunt lives further away and my grandpa is not in the best place to have me live with him, I have been with my boyfriend's family since I left home in October. I have a lot more I could say but I already feel like there are way too many parts here and so for now I’ll leave it at this. So yeah, AITA for moving out after I was treated like shit for years while witnessing the mistreatment of my sibling?
submitted by Super_Season_811 to narcissisticparents [link] [comments]
My parents (40F and 42M) are very religious and were somewhat strict while I was growing up. I have two younger brothers, one 17 and one 8 (this will be important later). For context, my father is a pastor at a local church and my parent’s religious beliefs are the reasoning behind most if not all of their actions. Growing up, I was never a stereotypical girl. I didn’t have many female friends and was usually not accepted in groups with guys as I was a girl and we were kids. I was extroverted as a child but due to being repeatedly rejected by kids my age, I became more introverted. I was a major nerd who loved superheroes and I wanted to play sports. Again, for context, the town I grew up in was very conservative and my parents are very conservative themselves. Girls liked girl things- even if they claimed that’s not how they felt, it’s how they acted. However, as a kid, I did not realize this. I played soccer and basketball growing up, regardless of how “weird” it made me because I didn’t think there was anything wrong with it. I was probably around 9 or 10 at this point. It was around this time my parents started having issues with my hobbies. I remember my parents trying to convince me to be a cheerleader because I would “like it more,” but I insisted on playing basketball. (This basketball/cheer program was through our church by the way). Because I was still young, they let it slide, but to this day I remember them being annoyed with it. This is also around the time dieting was introduced to me as well as calorie counting. I have always struggled with my weight and so has my mother, so they were very adamant on making sure I was being “healthy.” I didn’t understand it, but as a child, the only thing I was worried about was making my parents happy. A lot of discipline I received revolved around emotion. What I was doing was right or wrong and if I did something wrong, I felt terrible and awful and would often come crying to my parents about the mistakes I made, fearful of their disappointment and anger if they found things out themselves. They also made everything a moral dilemma- everything was about God and religion and as a kid, it really messed with my head. I would blame myself for everything that went wrong, seeing it as God’s punishment for my behavior. When I was 9, I went so far as to blame my grandmother’s death on myself because I was hanging out with boys instead of girls. This made me to be more of an introvert and my now anxiety disorder is much much worse.
About a year later, my parents sat down with me and my brother and told us they wanted to adopt. At first, I was very excited. I loved the idea of having another brother or sister. And I wouldn’t trade my 8 year old brother (let’s call him Scott) for anything, but adopting kids is part of what triggered a huge change in my parent’s behavior. Also- I had started getting older. I loved playing video games, watching cartoons and writing. However, these weren’t the things they wanted me to like I guess, because I started to feel their judgment become more clear and apparent as I got older. Now, I assume this is because as a kid, I just did what I was told, or my oddities were assumed to fade over time, but that is not the case anymore. Anyways, entering middle school, our family fostered a little girl, let’s call her Ally. A young woman in our church had told us that Ally’s family was out of the picture, and as her aunt, she couldn’t take her in as she was already a single mom and planned on adopting her brother, but couldn’t handle all three alone. So my family stepped in- however, we had come to find that her father was still in the picture and was actively fighting for custody. And Ally was a bit of a handful. My parents have admitted that they expected to swoop in, save a child from a hard life and be the heroes, and when things were harder than that they were very upset. Ally was about three- she remembered her mom (who was in jail i believe), her sisters, her grandma and grandpa, as well as her dad. She didn’t want our family, she wanted hers. She didn’t listen to my parents and rejected their parenting. This is what started to make my parents snap. I understand it was hard for them, but now that I’m older, I get it. She was a little girl who wanted her family. But they took her rejection very seriously and were constantly unhappy with her and made sure she knew it. Children not listening immediately was newer to them as my brother and I both did pretty much whatever they asked, and they did not take well to being told “no” by a child. 8 months after living with Ally, she was taken in by her grandparents to live with them and her sisters. The next day, my parents took my brother and I on a small trip. I’m not sure if it was to cheer us up or to celebrate. I was quite sad though- I had started to really care about Ally and had convinced myself that “God would take care of things” and I would have a sister. But I was angry- God took someone away from me and I was doing everything right. Why was he punishing me? Nothing made sense. Yet, only a year later, my parents were considering taking in another child. I wanted nothing to do with it- God had already taken one sibling away from me. I couldn’t do it again. In the end, I agreed and soon became attached to this little boy, who was two when we met him. This was Scott. I immediately became attached- and I love this kid more than I can describe- he’s my little brother and I would do anything for him.
This is where things start to go further downhill. Scott has a lot of trauma and mental issues, one of those issues being oppositional defiant disorder. That basically means that listening to any form of authority is near impossible for him, and causes him to lash out and act younger than he is. This is probably due to a number of reasons, as he was severely neglected and abused as an infant and his birth mother was on several different substances while pregnant with him, to the point where he was born high on several illegal drugs. He was left in a car seat for most of his infant life, so the back of his head is slightly flattened due to this. My parents are very obedient/disciplined-based parents, so his behavior rocked their world. In my opinion, the way they handled things with Scott was borderline abusive. There were several occasions where he would say he hated them (as young children do when they're mad) and they would flip. Telling him that if he didn’t want them that was fine. They didn’t need him. He could run back to his other parents, but his mom was in jail and his dad didn’t want him, so good luck with that. If we were in the car when this happened, they would threaten to leave him on the side of the road and good luck finding his way home. Once my mother literally pulled to the side of the road, placed him outside the car and started driving so he would “think they would leave him if his actions didn’t change,” but she turned around to get him. Because they would “never actually abandon or hurt him,” their actions were justified and perfectly fine. They would tell him he was acting like a baby when he started to cry and scream. “Little baby Scott, do you need a diaper?” Is how they would tease him when he became older, which just made his tantrums worse. They would tell him how disappointed they were with him and that he should be ashamed of himself and the way he acted because they gave him everything. They would call him, to his face, “an ungrateful manipulative piece of shit.” Because according to my parents, he could control his actions 100% and was choosing to act out to make their lives difficult. While I understand that this was hard for them, in my opinion, this in no way excuses their behavior. One time, Scott was crying and was upset (who knows why, but the kid had a lot of trauma and mental issues so it didn’t bother me too much), and my mother picked him up and put him in his room. She told him that every time he tried to leave his room, she would take away one of his stuffed animals. (He had several that he loved very much). Because this sounded so terrible to him, he ran after her trying to say it wasn’t fair. So she went into his room and took a stuffed animal. This cycle continued while he cried and begged for her to stop, because he just didn’t get it that she was going to keep doing this over and over and his trying to convince her was making it worse. Eventually, there were none left, and she told him if he didn’t stop crying she was going to throw them all away. I don’t remember what happened after that, but I do know that several of them were thrown away, if not at that time than others. There are many other instances of things like this and worse occurring, but we’d be here for a while if I tried to recount them all. Moving forwards to closer when I was moving out-
Now, several years later, when I turned sixteen, I had come to terms with the fact that I was bisexual. This went against everything my family was for, and I knew exactly how they viewed queer people. So, I started learning about different branches of Christianity and felt like I knew a God who loved me as I was and was happy in my decision to switch denominations. (My parents were baptists, and I wanted to be non-denominational). A few months after this, I decided to tell my parents the truth. I had done my best to give them hints, but I wanted to be honest with them because I trusted that they would love me and be there for me no matter what. When I told them I wanted to talk to them about something, they pushed and pressed and I had been trying to wait to talk to them until the next day. I had been seeing my high school counselor, and she suggested giving them a heads-up before springing that conversation up on them. However, after telling them to wait, they went through my phone and saw that I had researched different denominations and read different sermons on queer-accepting faith. They were livid. To be clear- I had a friend over while this was happening. We were watching a movie and joking about how I lost my phone and couldn’t show them this picture I wanted to. Then, I was called upstairs. I had apparently betrayed my parents and, “how could I do this to them, when I had someone over?” My father demanded I send my friend home, but my mother convinced him for one more hour. I was told not to tell my friend anything they had said and to act like things were fine, but I couldn’t. I went back downstairs where we were hanging out and started sobbing. I felt like my whole world was falling apart. Everything was over- and the people I thought would love me no matter what made me so afraid and sad, I was completely broken. My friend did their best to comfort me and even felt weary to leave me alone with my family but I told them I’d be okay, and asked that they update our friends about the situation. That night was hellish. So many conversations, them trying to understand what I felt, but not taking me particularly seriously either. That night turned into weeks of books, slideshows, conversations, and prayers. It felt like at-home conversion therapy. Eventually, I was given a choice “put my convictional flag in the ground or loose their trust.” As the petrified 16 year old, I chose to lie. I put my “flag” in the ground and did my best to, “earn back their trust” and repair their reputation that I had tarnished. The next couple months were a blur. I felt so terrible about myself. I didn’t know what I thought or believed and I became extremely hyper anxious and depressed. I had lost all sense of privacy and I did trust my parents further than I could toss them. My 17 year old brother (he was 14 at the time, let’s call him James) was 100% on board with my parents. My life felt like a living nightmare. My parents had it so that all my texts sent or received from my phone would go directly to theirs, so I couldn’t even confide in my friends without getting into trouble (which had happened and was how I found out that they did that because I deleted the texts immediately after sending/receiving things).. Everything felt like it was about me and how I needed to earn back their trust and how I was a terrible betrayer who they were not proud of in the slightest. I had gone to get a pixie cut (with their approval) and after they told me I was disgusting and repulsive and would never find a man to love me. I was heartbroken and felt so alone and unloved in my house, while I had to watch my younger brother be treated the way he was by my parents.
Luckily, I had a lot of friends and our school counselor who had been there for me through everything. They showered me with support and love and made sure I had a safe space to exist and truthfully I think they’re the only reason I didn’t do anything drastic and am still here today. It was hard though because James went to the same school as me and would tell my parents if I was with anyone he knew was queer or queer accepting. This caused me to be very very paranoid about who I was with, when, where, etc. Constantly covering my tracks, having an excuse set up and ready to bolt if I saw anyone I knew. What made things equally hard is that the church my father works at is quite big in our area. So if someone from our church or someone who knew my family saw me with anyone they labeled as “queer” or “gay,” they would tell my family as well. For the most part, I didn’t feel safe anywhere. I was constantly alert and on guard, even when I was asleep as my parents had woken me up before to confront me about someone I was friends with at school.
Fortunately for me, despite everything being such a mess, I am quite academically smart. I got a job the second I turned sixteen as I had heard the horror stories of queer kids being kicked out and wanted to be prepared. I had been saving money, taking college classes (we have a state program that pays for the classes while you’re in high school), and putting on a show for my family for quite some time. After saving some money, I paid my parents for an older car that they had paid off ten or so years ago. After my brother turned 16, he claimed it was too hard to share a car with me, so while I was away visiting a friend they bought him a car and told us that they expected each of us to pay them one thousand dollars before we graduated high school and that when we did so, they would sign over our respective cars to us. To be clear, I contributed to insurance and paid for my own gas, as well as contributing to my phone bill and money for food. Meanwhile, my brother had no job, and was constantly asking my parents for money to go out with friends. He had also taken up golfing, which as most people know is extremely expensive, and my parents funded everything. James had actually admitted to asking for more money than he needed and save the leftovers for whatever he wanted. I was also expected to chauffeur him to golf events and to get togethers with his friends, and my parents would in return give me some gas money. Another thing to note is that the only reason I was contributing to our phone bill is because James wanted unlimited data and my father said it was unreasonable unless we both contributed financially. I refused as I was trying to save money (as I would have with the car situation), however things per normal went James’s way. However, because he did not have a job, he was not expected to pay anything and would not be charged for the months and years that he did not contribute to. I did my best not to let these things get to me and to keep a level head. I paid my parents for the car because I already had over two thousand dollars saved as a seventeen year old high school student due to my hard work.
I focused on my classes and joined theater to help fill the hours in between school and work. I was much more active my sophomore year but when James also decided to join theater I retreated a bit as my once safe space to freely exist was no longer safe. I joined the stage crew but honestly that was also very enjoyable and lethargic for me and I enjoyed it a lot. Anyways, I was mostly a straight A student besides the stray Bs and one or two Cs (psychology and AP government screwed me over) and was working 15 or so hours a week. This is on top of my commitments to the church which were most of my Sundays and my Wednesday evenings. The funny thing is though- James missed more church than I ever did yet because my absence was because of work and not golf, I was the one consistently reprimanded for my lack of attendance and socialization whilst I was there. Yet because James could never do anything wrong and was a very extroverted person his lack of attendance wasn’t as serious as my own. I had one close friend through our church, let’s call her Grace (now 18F) and she actually knew about everything and was very supportive of me. I also had some other friends who really only showed up to church so I didn’t have to go through the torture alone which I don’t know if I could ever repay them for. Besides the people I was comfortable with though, I was pretty much a loner there and this heavily displeased my parents as it made them look bad and messed with their reputation. I never realized how much appearances meant to them until all of the shit that happened took place. As I mentioned before, our church is very conservative and traditional, and many sermons and lessons revolved around gender roles and the sinfulness of the world in terms fo the LGBTQ community. I consistently felt targeted because of my looks and my personality and stopped feeling comfortable there a very long time ago.
Now that more context is in place, fast forward to the end of my junior year. I had at this point finished all my high school requirements for graduation and was given an incredible opportunity to go to our local college full time for my senior year. I was very excited and happy because not only did it give me more freedom but it also meant I would get more than a year of my college education paid for by the state.
It was also around this time when I met my now boyfriend, let’s call him Dean. We were coworkers and had begun to get to know each other. We had a lot in common and while were different people personality wise, we enjoyed each other’s company quite a bit. By some miracle, I convinced my parents to allow me to hang out with him outside of work by claiming he was just a friend and saying that he was a Christian (which is by no means true). They were extremely skeptical but allowed us to hang out. We had an incredible time- and by the end of our first date he asked me to be his girlfriend which I happily accepted. I was so happy, but when I got home, things spiraled out of control. I told my parents about our time, and they were extremely unhappy as they felt fooled (which they were to be fair) and told me I was not allowed to see him ever again. I was devastated and they said a lot of very uncalled for things and but I understand why they were angry. To be clear, they knew I had a romantic interest in Dean and that this hangout was to see if we would be compatible partners and get to know each other better. They did not call it a date though because they weren’t comfortable with it, even if it was a date and they kinda knew it. So while they were on some level “fooled,” I feel that their anger and harshness wasn’t called for as they knew the intentions of our hanging out. The next morning my father demanded to see my phone. This is when I started to panic. You see, they had stop tracking my texts and I had openly flirted with Dean over text. Nothing that explicit and no photos of any kind. But the flirting would be enough for them to tear my world apart and I knew it. They had gone through my personal conversations before and made me feel terrible because of it and I refused to let them do it again. So I deleted everything. The entire conversation chain, I removed it from my phone 100%. My parents absolutely lost their shit. They had been manipulating and gaslighting me for years, doing anything and everything to keep their control and with my actions I showed them they couldn’t control me forever and things went very downhill. I lost all my privacy and was once again told how I had betrayed them and I was terrible and couldn’t be trusted. Again- I partially understand their anger here because I had directly disobeyed a command. But at the same time, I feel as a young woman I should be allowed some sense of privacy and the ability to talk to people without being constantly monitored. I don’t feel like I did anything wrong and would happily do it again in a heartbeat if it meant I’d be where I am today. Regardless of this, my life became a living hell once again, and my parents compared this to when I came out, “which was maybe the worst night of their lives.” They stripped me of all my privileges even if I didn’t have many to begin with. They made me feel absolutely miserable and awful about myself and I was monitored like never before. I would be working and receive texts upon texts of how I was so terrible and how could I do this to them because they had done everything for me and I’m a terrible daughter who should be ashamed of myself for the deceit and malicious nature of my actions. Again- this was because they could not read the messages between me and my now boyfriend. I understand them being mad but they took it to a completely inappropriate level. I shared everything happening with my friends and counselor and they supported me and assured me I did nothing wrong and they would be there for me which helped but as my home was now a living hellscape it was hard to hear it. I found a way to tell Dean about things and at first he felt guilty but I assured him that their actions were not his fault but theirs. He then asked me if I wanted to pause our relationship but I told him honestly that they had taken so many things I cared about over the years and I refused to let them take this. I did tell him however I understood if he didn’t want to put up with all the complicatedness of my family but he told me he cared for me and would be there so long as I was okay with it. He also told me if things ever got really bad at home, regardless of the fact we had just started dating, he had spoken to his family and they offered me a place to stay if I needed/wanted it. This really touched me, but I reassured him that it was not his job to offer that, but I appreciated the offer.
This begins our relationship and we were very happy. We had found a way to communicate over email, and we were able to hide our relationship with my family. Luckily for me, over the years I had made a habit of hanging out at the park by myself so it was not strange for me to head to the park for a couple of hours. There, I would leave my car and phone (my phone had a tracker on it) and Dean and I would hangout multiple times a week and it was heaven. At this point, we’ve only been dating for a year but I can admit without any doubt that I am in love with this man and he is in love with me. During the school year, it became easier for us to hang out in between classes as we both went to the same college (I am older for my year in school and he is younger, so he was a sophomore in college while I was a senior in high school. However, we are barely a year apart in age for anyone who is concerned). However, in order for us to communicate and hang out, I had to be extremely diligent and was consistently covering my tracks while “once again, earning my parents trust and repairing our relationship.” Because of course their actions were completely justified and I was the one in the wrong, per normal. Anyways, every day, I was editing search histories, erasing messages, and looking over my shoulder. Our church had a program on campus where Dean and I went to school, so being together in public was risky as my father’s friends and coworkers were always on campus and I knew I would be screwed if we were caught together. We had a couple of close calls over the months but it was all worth it because I hadn’t been that happy in years.
Now, to the day I left and why. You see, my parents' behavior towards Scott was becoming more aggressive and worse over time. They also had, in my opinion, a drinking problem. Considering they didn’t deny it when I called them out, they may agree. They would behave more hostile after several drinks and it was happening so consistently I was constantly walking on eggshells. Between the way they treated Scott, the way they treated me and the constant stress I was under trying to balance my life in fear of the repercussions, things became too much. When things weren’t going to shit, I was consistently expected to either babysit my brother and do chores while being a full time college student and working a part time job WHILE attending church multiple times a week and keeping up with my responsibilities as a senior. This is on top of the stress my parents' behavior caused, meanwhile James was expected to do almost nothing in comparison. Don’t get me wrong- he didn’t do anything, but he had almost no responsibilities outside of school and his extracurriculars which were exclusively funded by my parents. Yes he helped with dishes during the week and would keep his space tidy. But as my schedule became much more flexible due to my school schedule, my expectations around the house became much higher than his. Even though I paid 200 a month on gas, 50 a month for insurance and 50 a month for the phone bill, and he paid nothing for his car, insurance, phone, gas, nothing. So you would think he would be expected to help in the house more but no. Also, James’s behavior towards Scott mimicked my parents and so all babysitting responsibilities fell on me as they couldn’t be trusted alone together. I was rarely if ever paid for my cleaning or babysitting services as it was my responsibility as their eldest child. They would also consistently judge me for my weight, cloths, hair, hobbies, etc. Why did I think it was a good idea to get fast food? I clearly didn’t need it. They would “outfit check me” to make sure the outfits I wore were feminine enough because the way I look effected their reputation and I couldn’t be trusted. I was not allowed to cut my hair after their tantrum over it. As for my hobbies, I stopped playing sports in middle school as I am very short (currently 5 foot even) and was unable to keep up with my peers. However my interest in video games and cartoons wasn’t feminine enough and they proceeded to compare me to my best friend Grace because she was skinnier and liked more feminine things than I did which hurt a lot. Another thing for context, I have PCOS. It’s an endocrine disorder that heavily effects your metabolism and hormones, which in turn severely effected my weight, however my parents never acknowledged it and again made everything my fault. So from what I wore, what I ate, who I hung out with and what I enjoyed doing was constantly criticized, scrutinized and eventually controlled by my family for years. On top of everything else, I was done. I was 18, I had resaved the thousand I paid my family and knew I was at a place where I didn’t need them and was tired of being treated like shit. So I left.
The night I moved out was a total shit show. I had rallied Dean and my other friend, let’s call them Rita (18NB), and they helped me form a plan. When I returned home, Dean and Rita would be on their way. I would pack everything that belonged to me or I felt they would let me take, and prep the bags outside. After Rita arrived I went to try and explain to my parents that I would be leaving and explain calmly why. In a perfect world, we would have had a long deep talk, and things would have ended alright. That is far, far from what happened. They immediately starting screaming, and took my phone and car keys as both belonged to them, which I calmly handed over. Rita was there for emotional support, and put themselves between me and my parents as they got more angry and seemed to be turning aggressive. After that, my father called the police and claimed that there was an intruder in their home trying to take their child. Yeah. Complete bullshit- which to this day I’m surprised they were never charged with falsifying a 911 call. They screamed at Rita to get out of their home and was screaming that I was throwing away everything and I needed to reconsider. I ignored them and attempted to calmly walk out, and my parents attempted to barricade the doors while harassing Rita to leave. Because Rita is incredible and one of my closest friends now, they refused to leave without me which was very calming. While my parents were distracted yelling at them, I slipped out through the garage. My mother saw this and then grabbed me, attempting to drag me inside by my arm. Rita saw this and assisted me in getting her off me, and after doing so we continued to walk towards Dean’s car where he was waiting for us. He figured it would be best if my family didn’t see him for the time being as they would definitely lose their minds at seeing his face. My parents continued screaming and then the cops arrived. They were quite confused at first because they had been sent to deal with a potential kidnapping, only to see two grown adults throwing a tantrum because their adult child didn’t want to live with them anymore. That night was honestly so insane I could write three more pages about everything they said and did. The most notable events were first when my mother tried to explain to the police that because I was her child, she was allowed to put her hands on me, which they humorously informed her was not the case. The next was when James came home from theater rehearsal, to which my parents told them that I was abandoning our family. He was an emotional wreck through all of it, and to this day has told me that until I “fix” things with our parents he is not okay with having any form of relationship with me. Throughout all of this Scott was in his room, and I was allowed to give him one last hug before leaving. The final and most notable thing, was as the cops allowed my boyfriend, Rita and I to leave, my father threatened violence towards my boyfriend and accused him of "taking advantage of his underage daughter," which is just ridiculous as we are practically the same age, and anything we had done together was consensual and reserved for after I turned 18. Another thing my parents did was go through each bag I had packed and took everything they felt belonged to them, including the laptop provided to me by my high school, which they hilariously were made to give back to me several days later as it was not theirs and they had no right to take it. They tried claiming they were giving it to me out of the kindness of their hearts, but that bullshit meant nothing as after I informed the school of their behavior, the school assured me they would be made to give it back. Another thing they threatened to do as I left was pull me out of high school, which I was assured by the police they were not capable of doing as I was 18. The police were for the most part annoyed with my parents, tired of their bs and told me I seemed to be a capable young woman and wished me the best of luck. My parents had tried to ask the police to say I was mentally unstable for the time being so I wouldn’t be allowed to leave, as their “she’s still in high school” excuse didn’t do anything. You see, as my father is an influential church figure and had friends in the police force, he thought they would be on his side but was sorely mistaken as the chief told him they wouldn’t be doing him any favors. And with that, I was free.
My boyfriend's family has been nothing but unconditionally kind and supportive and have accepted me as part of their family which has been a huge blessing in all of this. I am in contact with my father’s sister and his father, my aunt and grandpa, and as I have expressed my unhappiness at home, they are supportive of me as well. However, as my aunt lives further away and my grandpa is not in the best place to have me live with him, I have been with my boyfriend's family since I left home in October. I have a lot more I could say but I already feel like there are way too many parts here and so for now I’ll leave it at this. So yeah, AITA for moving out after I was treated like shit for years while witnessing the mistreatment of my sibling?
2024.05.15 23:49 definitelyisnt I’m considering having and raising more children after I gave my second born up for adoption 4 years ago, but I feel guilty.
Hey there! I'm reaching out for advice, especially from those who were adopted at birth. I'm a birth parent, but I can't fully grasp the adoptee's perspective. Let me give you a bit of background.
I've always dreamed of having a big, happy family, probably because my own upbringing was far from ideal. Growing up, I had a deadbeat dad who disappeared when I was a teen, leaving me to deal with a narcissistic mom who made my life a living hell. Despite these challenges, I became a mom myself at just 16. Raising my son, J, amidst the chaos of my own teenage years was tough, but I fought tooth and nail to give him the best life possible. It wasn't easy, especially with my abusive ex constantly in the picture, making custody battles a regular occurrence. Then, when I was 21 and already struggling to keep my head above water, I found out I was pregnant again. This time, I was homeless and alone, with no support from the baby's father who had ghosted me. Faced with an impossible situation, I made the heartbreaking decision to give my second child, D, up for adoption in the hopes that they would have a better life than I could provide. Little did I know, the adoptive parents turned out to be just as abusive, if not worse, than my own parents. We were supposed to have an open adoption so I could get pictures and videos with updates at least, but it isn’t legally enforceable. Now I have no way of knowing if D is safe or alive or anything. I don’t know what they look like or sound like.
It's been a long and painful journey, but with the help of therapy and a strong support system, I've managed to pick up the pieces of my life. Now, at 26, I'm engaged to my best friend of 8 years, and we're planning our wedding. One of the things that drew me to him is our shared dream of having children, a decent sized family. He's eager to be a stepdad to J, and the thought of starting a family with him fills me with both excitement, but also dread. On one hand, I long to experience the joys of parenthood again, to have the chance to raise a child in a loving and stable environment finally. But on the other hand, I can't shake the guilt and fear that come with the memory of giving D up for adoption.
Would it be fair to J, who has already been through so much, to bring another child into our lives? And what about D? How would they feel knowing that I gave them up to care for J, only to have more children later on? These thoughts weigh heavily on my mind, and I haven't talked about this with my fiancé yet, not because I fear his reaction—he's always been supportive and loving—but because I don't want to cause him anxiety or hurt him. He's always dreamed of having kids, and I know it would devastate him if I decide otherwise. So, if you were adopted at birth, I'd love to hear your perspective on this. How would you feel if your birth parents went on to have more children after giving you up for adoption?
submitted by definitelyisnt to Adoption [link] [comments]
I've always dreamed of having a big, happy family, probably because my own upbringing was far from ideal. Growing up, I had a deadbeat dad who disappeared when I was a teen, leaving me to deal with a narcissistic mom who made my life a living hell. Despite these challenges, I became a mom myself at just 16. Raising my son, J, amidst the chaos of my own teenage years was tough, but I fought tooth and nail to give him the best life possible. It wasn't easy, especially with my abusive ex constantly in the picture, making custody battles a regular occurrence. Then, when I was 21 and already struggling to keep my head above water, I found out I was pregnant again. This time, I was homeless and alone, with no support from the baby's father who had ghosted me. Faced with an impossible situation, I made the heartbreaking decision to give my second child, D, up for adoption in the hopes that they would have a better life than I could provide. Little did I know, the adoptive parents turned out to be just as abusive, if not worse, than my own parents. We were supposed to have an open adoption so I could get pictures and videos with updates at least, but it isn’t legally enforceable. Now I have no way of knowing if D is safe or alive or anything. I don’t know what they look like or sound like.
It's been a long and painful journey, but with the help of therapy and a strong support system, I've managed to pick up the pieces of my life. Now, at 26, I'm engaged to my best friend of 8 years, and we're planning our wedding. One of the things that drew me to him is our shared dream of having children, a decent sized family. He's eager to be a stepdad to J, and the thought of starting a family with him fills me with both excitement, but also dread. On one hand, I long to experience the joys of parenthood again, to have the chance to raise a child in a loving and stable environment finally. But on the other hand, I can't shake the guilt and fear that come with the memory of giving D up for adoption.
Would it be fair to J, who has already been through so much, to bring another child into our lives? And what about D? How would they feel knowing that I gave them up to care for J, only to have more children later on? These thoughts weigh heavily on my mind, and I haven't talked about this with my fiancé yet, not because I fear his reaction—he's always been supportive and loving—but because I don't want to cause him anxiety or hurt him. He's always dreamed of having kids, and I know it would devastate him if I decide otherwise. So, if you were adopted at birth, I'd love to hear your perspective on this. How would you feel if your birth parents went on to have more children after giving you up for adoption?
2024.05.15 23:49 guaardin REASSURANCE
Yesterday I was dumb and continued this conversation on Instagram with a girl, she said she was 19, turning 20 in December and I told her my age being 21.
It started off good and then turned sexual fast, the usual with most people on this subreddit.
The thing is, she sent pictures and videos back and she matched the PFP.
I didn't pay anything and eventually blocked them on telegram and Instagram, even shutting down my social medias as people mentioned to do on here.
The thing that scares me is how she added me to a Instagram group chat so fast with what I saw 2 real people I follow but there were more people.
She went went on to say "look what I got here" and sent out DM's and photos/videos with my Instagram next to it in one of the video of me jacking it. She has the convo, my face and videos unfortunately.
I'm dumb, I know I shouldve known it was a scam but the thing that got me is that she sent pictures and videos which matches her PFP so ofc I thought it was real.
I just need reassurance about the group message on Instagram.. will my followers who were added actually see everything that she sent of our convos, my nudes, etc.
I feel dumb as fuck and I'm never getting Instagram back, I only have messenger, discord and reddit and I DONT EVEN WANNA ASK MY FRIEND ON DISCORD IF HE SAW ANYTHING FROM INSTAGRAM AS IM JUST EMBARRASSED.
submitted by guaardin to Sextortion [link] [comments]
It started off good and then turned sexual fast, the usual with most people on this subreddit.
The thing is, she sent pictures and videos back and she matched the PFP.
I didn't pay anything and eventually blocked them on telegram and Instagram, even shutting down my social medias as people mentioned to do on here.
The thing that scares me is how she added me to a Instagram group chat so fast with what I saw 2 real people I follow but there were more people.
She went went on to say "look what I got here" and sent out DM's and photos/videos with my Instagram next to it in one of the video of me jacking it. She has the convo, my face and videos unfortunately.
I'm dumb, I know I shouldve known it was a scam but the thing that got me is that she sent pictures and videos which matches her PFP so ofc I thought it was real.
I just need reassurance about the group message on Instagram.. will my followers who were added actually see everything that she sent of our convos, my nudes, etc.
I feel dumb as fuck and I'm never getting Instagram back, I only have messenger, discord and reddit and I DONT EVEN WANNA ASK MY FRIEND ON DISCORD IF HE SAW ANYTHING FROM INSTAGRAM AS IM JUST EMBARRASSED.
2024.05.15 23:48 Super_Season_811 AITA for moving out when I turned 18?
I, (18F) moved in with my boyfriend (19M) a couple of months after I turned 18, and my parents were furious and hurt. There’s a lot to unpack with this one, so bear with me.
My parents (40F and 42M) are very religious and were somewhat strict while I was growing up. I have two younger brothers, one 17 and one 8 (this will be important later). For context, my father is a pastor at a local church and my parent’s religious beliefs are the reasoning behind most if not all of their actions. Growing up, I was never a stereotypical girl. I didn’t have many female friends and was usually not accepted in groups with guys as I was a girl and we were kids. I was extroverted as a child but due to being repeatedly rejected by kids my age, I became more introverted. I was a major nerd who loved superheroes and I wanted to play sports. Again, for context, the town I grew up in was very conservative and my parents are very conservative themselves. Girls liked girl things- even if they claimed that’s not how they felt, it’s how they acted. However, as a kid, I did not realize this. I played soccer and basketball growing up, regardless of how “weird” it made me because I didn’t think there was anything wrong with it. I was probably around 9 or 10 at this point. It was around this time my parents started having issues with my hobbies. I remember my parents trying to convince me to be a cheerleader because I would “like it more,” but I insisted on playing basketball. (This basketball/cheer program was through our church by the way). Because I was still young, they let it slide, but to this day I remember them being annoyed with it. This is also around the time dieting was introduced to me as well as calorie counting. I have always struggled with my weight and so has my mother, so they were very adamant on making sure I was being “healthy.” I didn’t understand it, but as a child, the only thing I was worried about was making my parents happy. A lot of discipline I received revolved around emotion. What I was doing was right or wrong and if I did something wrong, I felt terrible and awful and would often come crying to my parents about the mistakes I made, fearful of their disappointment and anger if they found things out themselves. They also made everything a moral dilemma- everything was about God and religion and as a kid, it really messed with my head. I would blame myself for everything that went wrong, seeing it as God’s punishment for my behavior. When I was 9, I went so far as to blame my grandmother’s death on myself because I was hanging out with boys instead of girls. This made me to be more of an introvert and my now anxiety disorder is much much worse.
About a year later, my parents sat down with me and my brother and told us they wanted to adopt. At first, I was very excited. I loved the idea of having another brother or sister. And I wouldn’t trade my 8 year old brother (let’s call him Scott) for anything, but adopting kids is part of what triggered a huge change in my parent’s behavior. Also- I had started getting older. I loved playing video games, watching cartoons and writing. However, these weren’t the things they wanted me to like I guess, because I started to feel their judgment become more clear and apparent as I got older. Now, I assume this is because as a kid, I just did what I was told, or my oddities were assumed to fade over time, but that is not the case anymore. Anyways, entering middle school, our family fostered a little girl, let’s call her Ally. A young woman in our church had told us that Ally’s family was out of the picture, and as her aunt, she couldn’t take her in as she was already a single mom and planned on adopting her brother, but couldn’t handle all three alone. So my family stepped in- however, we had come to find that her father was still in the picture and was actively fighting for custody. And Ally was a bit of a handful. My parents have admitted that they expected to swoop in, save a child from a hard life and be the heroes, and when things were harder than that they were very upset. Ally was about three- she remembered her mom (who was in jail i believe), her sisters, her grandma and grandpa, as well as her dad. She didn’t want our family, she wanted hers. She didn’t listen to my parents and rejected their parenting. This is what started to make my parents snap. I understand it was hard for them, but now that I’m older, I get it. She was a little girl who wanted her family. But they took her rejection very seriously and were constantly unhappy with her and made sure she knew it. Children not listening immediately was newer to them as my brother and I both did pretty much whatever they asked, and they did not take well to being told “no” by a child. 8 months after living with Ally, she was taken in by her grandparents to live with them and her sisters. The next day, my parents took my brother and I on a small trip. I’m not sure if it was to cheer us up or to celebrate. I was quite sad though- I had started to really care about Ally and had convinced myself that “God would take care of things” and I would have a sister. But I was angry- God took someone away from me and I was doing everything right. Why was he punishing me? Nothing made sense. Yet, only a year later, my parents were considering taking in another child. I wanted nothing to do with it- God had already taken one sibling away from me. I couldn’t do it again. In the end, I agreed and soon became attached to this little boy, who was two when we met him. This was Scott. I immediately became attached- and I love this kid more than I can describe- he’s my little brother and I would do anything for him.
This is where things start to go further downhill. Scott has a lot of trauma and mental issues, one of those issues being oppositional defiant disorder. That basically means that listening to any form of authority is near impossible for him, and causes him to lash out and act younger than he is. This is probably due to a number of reasons, as he was severely neglected and abused as an infant and his birth mother was on several different substances while pregnant with him, to the point where he was born high on several illegal drugs. He was left in a car seat for most of his infant life, so the back of his head is slightly flattened due to this. My parents are very obedient/disciplined-based parents, so his behavior rocked their world. In my opinion, the way they handled things with Scott was borderline abusive. There were several occasions where he would say he hated them (as young children do when they're mad) and they would flip. Telling him that if he didn’t want them that was fine. They didn’t need him. He could run back to his other parents, but his mom was in jail and his dad didn’t want him, so good luck with that. If we were in the car when this happened, they would threaten to leave him on the side of the road and good luck finding his way home. Once my mother literally pulled to the side of the road, placed him outside the car and started driving so he would “think they would leave him if his actions didn’t change,” but she turned around to get him. Because they would “never actually abandon or hurt him,” their actions were justified and perfectly fine. They would tell him he was acting like a baby when he started to cry and scream. “Little baby Scott, do you need a diaper?” Is how they would tease him when he became older, which just made his tantrums worse. They would tell him how disappointed they were with him and that he should be ashamed of himself and the way he acted because they gave him everything. They would call him, to his face, “an ungrateful manipulative piece of shit.” Because according to my parents, he could control his actions 100% and was choosing to act out to make their lives difficult. While I understand that this was hard for them, in my opinion, this in no way excuses their behavior. One time, Scott was crying and was upset (who knows why, but the kid had a lot of trauma and mental issues so it didn’t bother me too much), and my mother picked him up and put him in his room. She told him that every time he tried to leave his room, she would take away one of his stuffed animals. (He had several that he loved very much). Because this sounded so terrible to him, he ran after her trying to say it wasn’t fair. So she went into his room and took a stuffed animal. This cycle continued while he cried and begged for her to stop, because he just didn’t get it that she was going to keep doing this over and over and his trying to convince her was making it worse. Eventually, there were none left, and she told him if he didn’t stop crying she was going to throw them all away. I don’t remember what happened after that, but I do know that several of them were thrown away, if not at that time than others. There are many other instances of things like this and worse occurring, but we’d be here for a while if I tried to recount them all. Moving forwards to closer when I was moving out-
Now, several years later, when I turned sixteen, I had come to terms with the fact that I was bisexual. This went against everything my family was for, and I knew exactly how they viewed queer people. So, I started learning about different branches of Christianity and felt like I knew a God who loved me as I was and was happy in my decision to switch denominations. (My parents were baptists, and I wanted to be non-denominational). A few months after this, I decided to tell my parents the truth. I had done my best to give them hints, but I wanted to be honest with them because I trusted that they would love me and be there for me no matter what. When I told them I wanted to talk to them about something, they pushed and pressed and I had been trying to wait to talk to them until the next day. I had been seeing my high school counselor, and she suggested giving them a heads-up before springing that conversation up on them. However, after telling them to wait, they went through my phone and saw that I had researched different denominations and read different sermons on queer-accepting faith. They were livid. To be clear- I had a friend over while this was happening. We were watching a movie and joking about how I lost my phone and couldn’t show them this picture I wanted to. Then, I was called upstairs. I had apparently betrayed my parents and, “how could I do this to them, when I had someone over?” My father demanded I send my friend home, but my mother convinced him for one more hour. I was told not to tell my friend anything they had said and to act like things were fine, but I couldn’t. I went back downstairs where we were hanging out and started sobbing. I felt like my whole world was falling apart. Everything was over- and the people I thought would love me no matter what made me so afraid and sad, I was completely broken. My friend did their best to comfort me and even felt weary to leave me alone with my family but I told them I’d be okay, and asked that they update our friends about the situation. That night was hellish. So many conversations, them trying to understand what I felt, but not taking me particularly seriously either. That night turned into weeks of books, slideshows, conversations, and prayers. It felt like at-home conversion therapy. Eventually, I was given a choice “put my convictional flag in the ground or loose their trust.” As the petrified 16 year old, I chose to lie. I put my “flag” in the ground and did my best to, “earn back their trust” and repair their reputation that I had tarnished. The next couple months were a blur. I felt so terrible about myself. I didn’t know what I thought or believed and I became extremely hyper anxious and depressed. I had lost all sense of privacy and I did trust my parents further than I could toss them. My 17 year old brother (he was 14 at the time, let’s call him James) was 100% on board with my parents. My life felt like a living nightmare. My parents had it so that all my texts sent or received from my phone would go directly to theirs, so I couldn’t even confide in my friends without getting into trouble (which had happened and was how I found out that they did that because I deleted the texts immediately after sending/receiving things).. Everything felt like it was about me and how I needed to earn back their trust and how I was a terrible betrayer who they were not proud of in the slightest. I had gone to get a pixie cut (with their approval) and after they told me I was disgusting and repulsive and would never find a man to love me. I was heartbroken and felt so alone and unloved in my house, while I had to watch my younger brother be treated the way he was by my parents.
Luckily, I had a lot of friends and our school counselor who had been there for me through everything. They showered me with support and love and made sure I had a safe space to exist and truthfully I think they’re the only reason I didn’t do anything drastic and am still here today. It was hard though because James went to the same school as me and would tell my parents if I was with anyone he knew was queer or queer accepting. This caused me to be very very paranoid about who I was with, when, where, etc. Constantly covering my tracks, having an excuse set up and ready to bolt if I saw anyone I knew. What made things equally hard is that the church my father works at is quite big in our area. So if someone from our church or someone who knew my family saw me with anyone they labeled as “queer” or “gay,” they would tell my family as well. For the most part, I didn’t feel safe anywhere. I was constantly alert and on guard, even when I was asleep as my parents had woken me up before to confront me about someone I was friends with at school.
Fortunately for me, despite everything being such a mess, I am quite academically smart. I got a job the second I turned sixteen as I had heard the horror stories of queer kids being kicked out and wanted to be prepared. I had been saving money, taking college classes (we have a state program that pays for the classes while you’re in high school), and putting on a show for my family for quite some time. After saving some money, I paid my parents for an older car that they had paid off ten or so years ago. After my brother turned 16, he claimed it was too hard to share a car with me, so while I was away visiting a friend they bought him a car and told us that they expected each of us to pay them one thousand dollars before we graduated high school and that when we did so, they would sign over our respective cars to us. To be clear, I contributed to insurance and paid for my own gas, as well as contributing to my phone bill and money for food. Meanwhile, my brother had no job, and was constantly asking my parents for money to go out with friends. He had also taken up golfing, which as most people know is extremely expensive, and my parents funded everything. James had actually admitted to asking for more money than he needed and save the leftovers for whatever he wanted. I was also expected to chauffeur him to golf events and to get togethers with his friends, and my parents would in return give me some gas money. Another thing to note is that the only reason I was contributing to our phone bill is because James wanted unlimited data and my father said it was unreasonable unless we both contributed financially. I refused as I was trying to save money (as I would have with the car situation), however things per normal went James’s way. However, because he did not have a job, he was not expected to pay anything and would not be charged for the months and years that he did not contribute to. I did my best not to let these things get to me and to keep a level head. I paid my parents for the car because I already had over two thousand dollars saved as a seventeen year old high school student due to my hard work.
I focused on my classes and joined theater to help fill the hours in between school and work. I was much more active my sophomore year but when James also decided to join theater I retreated a bit as my once safe space to freely exist was no longer safe. I joined the stage crew but honestly that was also very enjoyable and lethargic for me and I enjoyed it a lot. Anyways, I was mostly a straight A student besides the stray Bs and one or two Cs (psychology and AP government screwed me over) and was working 15 or so hours a week. This is on top of my commitments to the church which were most of my Sundays and my Wednesday evenings. The funny thing is though- James missed more church than I ever did yet because my absence was because of work and not golf, I was the one consistently reprimanded for my lack of attendance and socialization whilst I was there. Yet because James could never do anything wrong and was a very extroverted person his lack of attendance wasn’t as serious as my own. I had one close friend through our church, let’s call her Grace (now 18F) and she actually knew about everything and was very supportive of me. I also had some other friends who really only showed up to church so I didn’t have to go through the torture alone which I don’t know if I could ever repay them for. Besides the people I was comfortable with though, I was pretty much a loner there and this heavily displeased my parents as it made them look bad and messed with their reputation. I never realized how much appearances meant to them until all of the shit that happened took place. As I mentioned before, our church is very conservative and traditional, and many sermons and lessons revolved around gender roles and the sinfulness of the world in terms fo the LGBTQ community. I consistently felt targeted because of my looks and my personality and stopped feeling comfortable there a very long time ago.
Now that more context is in place, fast forward to the end of my junior year. I had at this point finished all my high school requirements for graduation and was given an incredible opportunity to go to our local college full time for my senior year. I was very excited and happy because not only did it give me more freedom but it also meant I would get more than a year of my college education paid for by the state.
It was also around this time when I met my now boyfriend, let’s call him Dean. We were coworkers and had begun to get to know each other. We had a lot in common and while were different people personality wise, we enjoyed each other’s company quite a bit. By some miracle, I convinced my parents to allow me to hang out with him outside of work by claiming he was just a friend and saying that he was a Christian (which is by no means true). They were extremely skeptical but allowed us to hang out. We had an incredible time- and by the end of our first date he asked me to be his girlfriend which I happily accepted. I was so happy, but when I got home, things spiraled out of control. I told my parents about our time, and they were extremely unhappy as they felt fooled (which they were to be fair) and told me I was not allowed to see him ever again. I was devastated and they said a lot of very uncalled for things and but I understand why they were angry. To be clear, they knew I had a romantic interest in Dean and that this hangout was to see if we would be compatible partners and get to know each other better. They did not call it a date though because they weren’t comfortable with it, even if it was a date and they kinda knew it. So while they were on some level “fooled,” I feel that their anger and harshness wasn’t called for as they knew the intentions of our hanging out. The next morning my father demanded to see my phone. This is when I started to panic. You see, they had stop tracking my texts and I had openly flirted with Dean over text. Nothing that explicit and no photos of any kind. But the flirting would be enough for them to tear my world apart and I knew it. They had gone through my personal conversations before and made me feel terrible because of it and I refused to let them do it again. So I deleted everything. The entire conversation chain, I removed it from my phone 100%. My parents absolutely lost their shit. They had been manipulating and gaslighting me for years, doing anything and everything to keep their control and with my actions I showed them they couldn’t control me forever and things went very downhill. I lost all my privacy and was once again told how I had betrayed them and I was terrible and couldn’t be trusted. Again- I partially understand their anger here because I had directly disobeyed a command. But at the same time, I feel as a young woman I should be allowed some sense of privacy and the ability to talk to people without being constantly monitored. I don’t feel like I did anything wrong and would happily do it again in a heartbeat if it meant I’d be where I am today. Regardless of this, my life became a living hell once again, and my parents compared this to when I came out, “which was maybe the worst night of their lives.” They stripped me of all my privileges even if I didn’t have many to begin with. They made me feel absolutely miserable and awful about myself and I was monitored like never before. I would be working and receive texts upon texts of how I was so terrible and how could I do this to them because they had done everything for me and I’m a terrible daughter who should be ashamed of myself for the deceit and malicious nature of my actions. Again- this was because they could not read the messages between me and my now boyfriend. I understand them being mad but they took it to a completely inappropriate level. I shared everything happening with my friends and counselor and they supported me and assured me I did nothing wrong and they would be there for me which helped but as my home was now a living hellscape it was hard to hear it. I found a way to tell Dean about things and at first he felt guilty but I assured him that their actions were not his fault but theirs. He then asked me if I wanted to pause our relationship but I told him honestly that they had taken so many things I cared about over the years and I refused to let them take this. I did tell him however I understood if he didn’t want to put up with all the complicatedness of my family but he told me he cared for me and would be there so long as I was okay with it. He also told me if things ever got really bad at home, regardless of the fact we had just started dating, he had spoken to his family and they offered me a place to stay if I needed/wanted it. This really touched me, but I reassured him that it was not his job to offer that, but I appreciated the offer.
This begins our relationship and we were very happy. We had found a way to communicate over email, and we were able to hide our relationship with my family. Luckily for me, over the years I had made a habit of hanging out at the park by myself so it was not strange for me to head to the park for a couple of hours. There, I would leave my car and phone (my phone had a tracker on it) and Dean and I would hangout multiple times a week and it was heaven. At this point, we’ve only been dating for a year but I can admit without any doubt that I am in love with this man and he is in love with me. During the school year, it became easier for us to hang out in between classes as we both went to the same college (I am older for my year in school and he is younger, so he was a sophomore in college while I was a senior in high school. However, we are barely a year apart in age for anyone who is concerned). However, in order for us to communicate and hang out, I had to be extremely diligent and was consistently covering my tracks while “once again, earning my parents trust and repairing our relationship.” Because of course their actions were completely justified and I was the one in the wrong, per normal. Anyways, every day, I was editing search histories, erasing messages, and looking over my shoulder. Our church had a program on campus where Dean and I went to school, so being together in public was risky as my father’s friends and coworkers were always on campus and I knew I would be screwed if we were caught together. We had a couple of close calls over the months but it was all worth it because I hadn’t been that happy in years.
Now, to the day I left and why. You see, my parents' behavior towards Scott was becoming more aggressive and worse over time. They also had, in my opinion, a drinking problem. Considering they didn’t deny it when I called them out, they may agree. They would behave more hostile after several drinks and it was happening so consistently I was constantly walking on eggshells. Between the way they treated Scott, the way they treated me and the constant stress I was under trying to balance my life in fear of the repercussions, things became too much. When things weren’t going to shit, I was consistently expected to either babysit my brother and do chores while being a full time college student and working a part time job WHILE attending church multiple times a week and keeping up with my responsibilities as a senior. This is on top of the stress my parents' behavior caused, meanwhile James was expected to do almost nothing in comparison. Don’t get me wrong- he didn’t do anything, but he had almost no responsibilities outside of school and his extracurriculars which were exclusively funded by my parents. Yes he helped with dishes during the week and would keep his space tidy. But as my schedule became much more flexible due to my school schedule, my expectations around the house became much higher than his. Even though I paid 200 a month on gas, 50 a month for insurance and 50 a month for the phone bill, and he paid nothing for his car, insurance, phone, gas, nothing. So you would think he would be expected to help in the house more but no. Also, James’s behavior towards Scott mimicked my parents and so all babysitting responsibilities fell on me as they couldn’t be trusted alone together. I was rarely if ever paid for my cleaning or babysitting services as it was my responsibility as their eldest child. They would also consistently judge me for my weight, cloths, hair, hobbies, etc. Why did I think it was a good idea to get fast food? I clearly didn’t need it. They would “outfit check me” to make sure the outfits I wore were feminine enough because the way I look effected their reputation and I couldn’t be trusted. I was not allowed to cut my hair after their tantrum over it. As for my hobbies, I stopped playing sports in middle school as I am very short (currently 5 foot even) and was unable to keep up with my peers. However my interest in video games and cartoons wasn’t feminine enough and they proceeded to compare me to my best friend Grace because she was skinnier and liked more feminine things than I did which hurt a lot. Another thing for context, I have PCOS. It’s an endocrine disorder that heavily effects your metabolism and hormones, which in turn severely effected my weight, however my parents never acknowledged it and again made everything my fault. So from what I wore, what I ate, who I hung out with and what I enjoyed doing was constantly criticized, scrutinized and eventually controlled by my family for years. On top of everything else, I was done. I was 18, I had resaved the thousand I paid my family and knew I was at a place where I didn’t need them and was tired of being treated like shit. So I left.
The night I moved out was a total shit show. I had rallied Dean and my other friend, let’s call them Rita (18NB), and they helped me form a plan. When I returned home, Dean and Rita would be on their way. I would pack everything that belonged to me or I felt they would let me take, and prep the bags outside. After Rita arrived I went to try and explain to my parents that I would be leaving and explain calmly why. In a perfect world, we would have had a long deep talk, and things would have ended alright. That is far, far from what happened. They immediately starting screaming, and took my phone and car keys as both belonged to them, which I calmly handed over. Rita was there for emotional support, and put themselves between me and my parents as they got more angry and seemed to be turning aggressive. After that, my father called the police and claimed that there was an intruder in their home trying to take their child. Yeah. Complete bullshit- which to this day I’m surprised they were never charged with falsifying a 911 call. They screamed at Rita to get out of their home and was screaming that I was throwing away everything and I needed to reconsider. I ignored them and attempted to calmly walk out, and my parents attempted to barricade the doors while harassing Rita to leave. Because Rita is incredible and one of my closest friends now, they refused to leave without me which was very calming. While my parents were distracted yelling at them, I slipped out through the garage. My mother saw this and then grabbed me, attempting to drag me inside by my arm. Rita saw this and assisted me in getting her off me, and after doing so we continued to walk towards Dean’s car where he was waiting for us. He figured it would be best if my family didn’t see him for the time being as they would definitely lose their minds at seeing his face. My parents continued screaming and then the cops arrived. They were quite confused at first because they had been sent to deal with a potential kidnapping, only to see two grown adults throwing a tantrum because their adult child didn’t want to live with them anymore. That night was honestly so insane I could write three more pages about everything they said and did. The most notable events were first when my mother tried to explain to the police that because I was her child, she was allowed to put her hands on me, which they humorously informed her was not the case. The next was when James came home from theater rehearsal, to which my parents told them that I was abandoning our family. He was an emotional wreck through all of it, and to this day has told me that until I “fix” things with our parents he is not okay with having any form of relationship with me. Throughout all of this Scott was in his room, and I was allowed to give him one last hug before leaving. The final and most notable thing, was as the cops allowed my boyfriend, Rita and I to leave, my father threatened violence towards my boyfriend and accused him of "taking advantage of his underage daughter," which is just ridiculous as we are practically the same age, and anything we had done together was consensual and reserved for after I turned 18. Another thing my parents did was go through each bag I had packed and took everything they felt belonged to them, including the laptop provided to me by my high school, which they hilariously were made to give back to me several days later as it was not theirs and they had no right to take it. They tried claiming they were giving it to me out of the kindness of their hearts, but that bullshit meant nothing as after I informed the school of their behavior, the school assured me they would be made to give it back. Another thing they threatened to do as I left was pull me out of high school, which I was assured by the police they were not capable of doing as I was 18. The police were for the most part annoyed with my parents, tired of their bs and told me I seemed to be a capable young woman and wished me the best of luck. My parents had tried to ask the police to say I was mentally unstable for the time being so I wouldn’t be allowed to leave, as their “she’s still in high school” excuse didn’t do anything. You see, as my father is an influential church figure and had friends in the police force, he thought they would be on his side but was sorely mistaken as the chief told him they wouldn’t be doing him any favors. And with that, I was free.
My boyfriend's family has been nothing but unconditionally kind and supportive and have accepted me as part of their family which has been a huge blessing in all of this. I am in contact with my father’s sister and his father, my aunt and grandpa, and as I have expressed my unhappiness at home, they are supportive of me as well. However, as my aunt lives further away and my grandpa is not in the best place to have me live with him, I have been with my boyfriend's family since I left home in October. I have a lot more I could say but I already feel like there are way too many parts here and so for now I’ll leave it at this. So yeah, AITA for moving out after I was treated like shit for years while witnessing the mistreatment of my sibling?
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My parents (40F and 42M) are very religious and were somewhat strict while I was growing up. I have two younger brothers, one 17 and one 8 (this will be important later). For context, my father is a pastor at a local church and my parent’s religious beliefs are the reasoning behind most if not all of their actions. Growing up, I was never a stereotypical girl. I didn’t have many female friends and was usually not accepted in groups with guys as I was a girl and we were kids. I was extroverted as a child but due to being repeatedly rejected by kids my age, I became more introverted. I was a major nerd who loved superheroes and I wanted to play sports. Again, for context, the town I grew up in was very conservative and my parents are very conservative themselves. Girls liked girl things- even if they claimed that’s not how they felt, it’s how they acted. However, as a kid, I did not realize this. I played soccer and basketball growing up, regardless of how “weird” it made me because I didn’t think there was anything wrong with it. I was probably around 9 or 10 at this point. It was around this time my parents started having issues with my hobbies. I remember my parents trying to convince me to be a cheerleader because I would “like it more,” but I insisted on playing basketball. (This basketball/cheer program was through our church by the way). Because I was still young, they let it slide, but to this day I remember them being annoyed with it. This is also around the time dieting was introduced to me as well as calorie counting. I have always struggled with my weight and so has my mother, so they were very adamant on making sure I was being “healthy.” I didn’t understand it, but as a child, the only thing I was worried about was making my parents happy. A lot of discipline I received revolved around emotion. What I was doing was right or wrong and if I did something wrong, I felt terrible and awful and would often come crying to my parents about the mistakes I made, fearful of their disappointment and anger if they found things out themselves. They also made everything a moral dilemma- everything was about God and religion and as a kid, it really messed with my head. I would blame myself for everything that went wrong, seeing it as God’s punishment for my behavior. When I was 9, I went so far as to blame my grandmother’s death on myself because I was hanging out with boys instead of girls. This made me to be more of an introvert and my now anxiety disorder is much much worse.
About a year later, my parents sat down with me and my brother and told us they wanted to adopt. At first, I was very excited. I loved the idea of having another brother or sister. And I wouldn’t trade my 8 year old brother (let’s call him Scott) for anything, but adopting kids is part of what triggered a huge change in my parent’s behavior. Also- I had started getting older. I loved playing video games, watching cartoons and writing. However, these weren’t the things they wanted me to like I guess, because I started to feel their judgment become more clear and apparent as I got older. Now, I assume this is because as a kid, I just did what I was told, or my oddities were assumed to fade over time, but that is not the case anymore. Anyways, entering middle school, our family fostered a little girl, let’s call her Ally. A young woman in our church had told us that Ally’s family was out of the picture, and as her aunt, she couldn’t take her in as she was already a single mom and planned on adopting her brother, but couldn’t handle all three alone. So my family stepped in- however, we had come to find that her father was still in the picture and was actively fighting for custody. And Ally was a bit of a handful. My parents have admitted that they expected to swoop in, save a child from a hard life and be the heroes, and when things were harder than that they were very upset. Ally was about three- she remembered her mom (who was in jail i believe), her sisters, her grandma and grandpa, as well as her dad. She didn’t want our family, she wanted hers. She didn’t listen to my parents and rejected their parenting. This is what started to make my parents snap. I understand it was hard for them, but now that I’m older, I get it. She was a little girl who wanted her family. But they took her rejection very seriously and were constantly unhappy with her and made sure she knew it. Children not listening immediately was newer to them as my brother and I both did pretty much whatever they asked, and they did not take well to being told “no” by a child. 8 months after living with Ally, she was taken in by her grandparents to live with them and her sisters. The next day, my parents took my brother and I on a small trip. I’m not sure if it was to cheer us up or to celebrate. I was quite sad though- I had started to really care about Ally and had convinced myself that “God would take care of things” and I would have a sister. But I was angry- God took someone away from me and I was doing everything right. Why was he punishing me? Nothing made sense. Yet, only a year later, my parents were considering taking in another child. I wanted nothing to do with it- God had already taken one sibling away from me. I couldn’t do it again. In the end, I agreed and soon became attached to this little boy, who was two when we met him. This was Scott. I immediately became attached- and I love this kid more than I can describe- he’s my little brother and I would do anything for him.
This is where things start to go further downhill. Scott has a lot of trauma and mental issues, one of those issues being oppositional defiant disorder. That basically means that listening to any form of authority is near impossible for him, and causes him to lash out and act younger than he is. This is probably due to a number of reasons, as he was severely neglected and abused as an infant and his birth mother was on several different substances while pregnant with him, to the point where he was born high on several illegal drugs. He was left in a car seat for most of his infant life, so the back of his head is slightly flattened due to this. My parents are very obedient/disciplined-based parents, so his behavior rocked their world. In my opinion, the way they handled things with Scott was borderline abusive. There were several occasions where he would say he hated them (as young children do when they're mad) and they would flip. Telling him that if he didn’t want them that was fine. They didn’t need him. He could run back to his other parents, but his mom was in jail and his dad didn’t want him, so good luck with that. If we were in the car when this happened, they would threaten to leave him on the side of the road and good luck finding his way home. Once my mother literally pulled to the side of the road, placed him outside the car and started driving so he would “think they would leave him if his actions didn’t change,” but she turned around to get him. Because they would “never actually abandon or hurt him,” their actions were justified and perfectly fine. They would tell him he was acting like a baby when he started to cry and scream. “Little baby Scott, do you need a diaper?” Is how they would tease him when he became older, which just made his tantrums worse. They would tell him how disappointed they were with him and that he should be ashamed of himself and the way he acted because they gave him everything. They would call him, to his face, “an ungrateful manipulative piece of shit.” Because according to my parents, he could control his actions 100% and was choosing to act out to make their lives difficult. While I understand that this was hard for them, in my opinion, this in no way excuses their behavior. One time, Scott was crying and was upset (who knows why, but the kid had a lot of trauma and mental issues so it didn’t bother me too much), and my mother picked him up and put him in his room. She told him that every time he tried to leave his room, she would take away one of his stuffed animals. (He had several that he loved very much). Because this sounded so terrible to him, he ran after her trying to say it wasn’t fair. So she went into his room and took a stuffed animal. This cycle continued while he cried and begged for her to stop, because he just didn’t get it that she was going to keep doing this over and over and his trying to convince her was making it worse. Eventually, there were none left, and she told him if he didn’t stop crying she was going to throw them all away. I don’t remember what happened after that, but I do know that several of them were thrown away, if not at that time than others. There are many other instances of things like this and worse occurring, but we’d be here for a while if I tried to recount them all. Moving forwards to closer when I was moving out-
Now, several years later, when I turned sixteen, I had come to terms with the fact that I was bisexual. This went against everything my family was for, and I knew exactly how they viewed queer people. So, I started learning about different branches of Christianity and felt like I knew a God who loved me as I was and was happy in my decision to switch denominations. (My parents were baptists, and I wanted to be non-denominational). A few months after this, I decided to tell my parents the truth. I had done my best to give them hints, but I wanted to be honest with them because I trusted that they would love me and be there for me no matter what. When I told them I wanted to talk to them about something, they pushed and pressed and I had been trying to wait to talk to them until the next day. I had been seeing my high school counselor, and she suggested giving them a heads-up before springing that conversation up on them. However, after telling them to wait, they went through my phone and saw that I had researched different denominations and read different sermons on queer-accepting faith. They were livid. To be clear- I had a friend over while this was happening. We were watching a movie and joking about how I lost my phone and couldn’t show them this picture I wanted to. Then, I was called upstairs. I had apparently betrayed my parents and, “how could I do this to them, when I had someone over?” My father demanded I send my friend home, but my mother convinced him for one more hour. I was told not to tell my friend anything they had said and to act like things were fine, but I couldn’t. I went back downstairs where we were hanging out and started sobbing. I felt like my whole world was falling apart. Everything was over- and the people I thought would love me no matter what made me so afraid and sad, I was completely broken. My friend did their best to comfort me and even felt weary to leave me alone with my family but I told them I’d be okay, and asked that they update our friends about the situation. That night was hellish. So many conversations, them trying to understand what I felt, but not taking me particularly seriously either. That night turned into weeks of books, slideshows, conversations, and prayers. It felt like at-home conversion therapy. Eventually, I was given a choice “put my convictional flag in the ground or loose their trust.” As the petrified 16 year old, I chose to lie. I put my “flag” in the ground and did my best to, “earn back their trust” and repair their reputation that I had tarnished. The next couple months were a blur. I felt so terrible about myself. I didn’t know what I thought or believed and I became extremely hyper anxious and depressed. I had lost all sense of privacy and I did trust my parents further than I could toss them. My 17 year old brother (he was 14 at the time, let’s call him James) was 100% on board with my parents. My life felt like a living nightmare. My parents had it so that all my texts sent or received from my phone would go directly to theirs, so I couldn’t even confide in my friends without getting into trouble (which had happened and was how I found out that they did that because I deleted the texts immediately after sending/receiving things).. Everything felt like it was about me and how I needed to earn back their trust and how I was a terrible betrayer who they were not proud of in the slightest. I had gone to get a pixie cut (with their approval) and after they told me I was disgusting and repulsive and would never find a man to love me. I was heartbroken and felt so alone and unloved in my house, while I had to watch my younger brother be treated the way he was by my parents.
Luckily, I had a lot of friends and our school counselor who had been there for me through everything. They showered me with support and love and made sure I had a safe space to exist and truthfully I think they’re the only reason I didn’t do anything drastic and am still here today. It was hard though because James went to the same school as me and would tell my parents if I was with anyone he knew was queer or queer accepting. This caused me to be very very paranoid about who I was with, when, where, etc. Constantly covering my tracks, having an excuse set up and ready to bolt if I saw anyone I knew. What made things equally hard is that the church my father works at is quite big in our area. So if someone from our church or someone who knew my family saw me with anyone they labeled as “queer” or “gay,” they would tell my family as well. For the most part, I didn’t feel safe anywhere. I was constantly alert and on guard, even when I was asleep as my parents had woken me up before to confront me about someone I was friends with at school.
Fortunately for me, despite everything being such a mess, I am quite academically smart. I got a job the second I turned sixteen as I had heard the horror stories of queer kids being kicked out and wanted to be prepared. I had been saving money, taking college classes (we have a state program that pays for the classes while you’re in high school), and putting on a show for my family for quite some time. After saving some money, I paid my parents for an older car that they had paid off ten or so years ago. After my brother turned 16, he claimed it was too hard to share a car with me, so while I was away visiting a friend they bought him a car and told us that they expected each of us to pay them one thousand dollars before we graduated high school and that when we did so, they would sign over our respective cars to us. To be clear, I contributed to insurance and paid for my own gas, as well as contributing to my phone bill and money for food. Meanwhile, my brother had no job, and was constantly asking my parents for money to go out with friends. He had also taken up golfing, which as most people know is extremely expensive, and my parents funded everything. James had actually admitted to asking for more money than he needed and save the leftovers for whatever he wanted. I was also expected to chauffeur him to golf events and to get togethers with his friends, and my parents would in return give me some gas money. Another thing to note is that the only reason I was contributing to our phone bill is because James wanted unlimited data and my father said it was unreasonable unless we both contributed financially. I refused as I was trying to save money (as I would have with the car situation), however things per normal went James’s way. However, because he did not have a job, he was not expected to pay anything and would not be charged for the months and years that he did not contribute to. I did my best not to let these things get to me and to keep a level head. I paid my parents for the car because I already had over two thousand dollars saved as a seventeen year old high school student due to my hard work.
I focused on my classes and joined theater to help fill the hours in between school and work. I was much more active my sophomore year but when James also decided to join theater I retreated a bit as my once safe space to freely exist was no longer safe. I joined the stage crew but honestly that was also very enjoyable and lethargic for me and I enjoyed it a lot. Anyways, I was mostly a straight A student besides the stray Bs and one or two Cs (psychology and AP government screwed me over) and was working 15 or so hours a week. This is on top of my commitments to the church which were most of my Sundays and my Wednesday evenings. The funny thing is though- James missed more church than I ever did yet because my absence was because of work and not golf, I was the one consistently reprimanded for my lack of attendance and socialization whilst I was there. Yet because James could never do anything wrong and was a very extroverted person his lack of attendance wasn’t as serious as my own. I had one close friend through our church, let’s call her Grace (now 18F) and she actually knew about everything and was very supportive of me. I also had some other friends who really only showed up to church so I didn’t have to go through the torture alone which I don’t know if I could ever repay them for. Besides the people I was comfortable with though, I was pretty much a loner there and this heavily displeased my parents as it made them look bad and messed with their reputation. I never realized how much appearances meant to them until all of the shit that happened took place. As I mentioned before, our church is very conservative and traditional, and many sermons and lessons revolved around gender roles and the sinfulness of the world in terms fo the LGBTQ community. I consistently felt targeted because of my looks and my personality and stopped feeling comfortable there a very long time ago.
Now that more context is in place, fast forward to the end of my junior year. I had at this point finished all my high school requirements for graduation and was given an incredible opportunity to go to our local college full time for my senior year. I was very excited and happy because not only did it give me more freedom but it also meant I would get more than a year of my college education paid for by the state.
It was also around this time when I met my now boyfriend, let’s call him Dean. We were coworkers and had begun to get to know each other. We had a lot in common and while were different people personality wise, we enjoyed each other’s company quite a bit. By some miracle, I convinced my parents to allow me to hang out with him outside of work by claiming he was just a friend and saying that he was a Christian (which is by no means true). They were extremely skeptical but allowed us to hang out. We had an incredible time- and by the end of our first date he asked me to be his girlfriend which I happily accepted. I was so happy, but when I got home, things spiraled out of control. I told my parents about our time, and they were extremely unhappy as they felt fooled (which they were to be fair) and told me I was not allowed to see him ever again. I was devastated and they said a lot of very uncalled for things and but I understand why they were angry. To be clear, they knew I had a romantic interest in Dean and that this hangout was to see if we would be compatible partners and get to know each other better. They did not call it a date though because they weren’t comfortable with it, even if it was a date and they kinda knew it. So while they were on some level “fooled,” I feel that their anger and harshness wasn’t called for as they knew the intentions of our hanging out. The next morning my father demanded to see my phone. This is when I started to panic. You see, they had stop tracking my texts and I had openly flirted with Dean over text. Nothing that explicit and no photos of any kind. But the flirting would be enough for them to tear my world apart and I knew it. They had gone through my personal conversations before and made me feel terrible because of it and I refused to let them do it again. So I deleted everything. The entire conversation chain, I removed it from my phone 100%. My parents absolutely lost their shit. They had been manipulating and gaslighting me for years, doing anything and everything to keep their control and with my actions I showed them they couldn’t control me forever and things went very downhill. I lost all my privacy and was once again told how I had betrayed them and I was terrible and couldn’t be trusted. Again- I partially understand their anger here because I had directly disobeyed a command. But at the same time, I feel as a young woman I should be allowed some sense of privacy and the ability to talk to people without being constantly monitored. I don’t feel like I did anything wrong and would happily do it again in a heartbeat if it meant I’d be where I am today. Regardless of this, my life became a living hell once again, and my parents compared this to when I came out, “which was maybe the worst night of their lives.” They stripped me of all my privileges even if I didn’t have many to begin with. They made me feel absolutely miserable and awful about myself and I was monitored like never before. I would be working and receive texts upon texts of how I was so terrible and how could I do this to them because they had done everything for me and I’m a terrible daughter who should be ashamed of myself for the deceit and malicious nature of my actions. Again- this was because they could not read the messages between me and my now boyfriend. I understand them being mad but they took it to a completely inappropriate level. I shared everything happening with my friends and counselor and they supported me and assured me I did nothing wrong and they would be there for me which helped but as my home was now a living hellscape it was hard to hear it. I found a way to tell Dean about things and at first he felt guilty but I assured him that their actions were not his fault but theirs. He then asked me if I wanted to pause our relationship but I told him honestly that they had taken so many things I cared about over the years and I refused to let them take this. I did tell him however I understood if he didn’t want to put up with all the complicatedness of my family but he told me he cared for me and would be there so long as I was okay with it. He also told me if things ever got really bad at home, regardless of the fact we had just started dating, he had spoken to his family and they offered me a place to stay if I needed/wanted it. This really touched me, but I reassured him that it was not his job to offer that, but I appreciated the offer.
This begins our relationship and we were very happy. We had found a way to communicate over email, and we were able to hide our relationship with my family. Luckily for me, over the years I had made a habit of hanging out at the park by myself so it was not strange for me to head to the park for a couple of hours. There, I would leave my car and phone (my phone had a tracker on it) and Dean and I would hangout multiple times a week and it was heaven. At this point, we’ve only been dating for a year but I can admit without any doubt that I am in love with this man and he is in love with me. During the school year, it became easier for us to hang out in between classes as we both went to the same college (I am older for my year in school and he is younger, so he was a sophomore in college while I was a senior in high school. However, we are barely a year apart in age for anyone who is concerned). However, in order for us to communicate and hang out, I had to be extremely diligent and was consistently covering my tracks while “once again, earning my parents trust and repairing our relationship.” Because of course their actions were completely justified and I was the one in the wrong, per normal. Anyways, every day, I was editing search histories, erasing messages, and looking over my shoulder. Our church had a program on campus where Dean and I went to school, so being together in public was risky as my father’s friends and coworkers were always on campus and I knew I would be screwed if we were caught together. We had a couple of close calls over the months but it was all worth it because I hadn’t been that happy in years.
Now, to the day I left and why. You see, my parents' behavior towards Scott was becoming more aggressive and worse over time. They also had, in my opinion, a drinking problem. Considering they didn’t deny it when I called them out, they may agree. They would behave more hostile after several drinks and it was happening so consistently I was constantly walking on eggshells. Between the way they treated Scott, the way they treated me and the constant stress I was under trying to balance my life in fear of the repercussions, things became too much. When things weren’t going to shit, I was consistently expected to either babysit my brother and do chores while being a full time college student and working a part time job WHILE attending church multiple times a week and keeping up with my responsibilities as a senior. This is on top of the stress my parents' behavior caused, meanwhile James was expected to do almost nothing in comparison. Don’t get me wrong- he didn’t do anything, but he had almost no responsibilities outside of school and his extracurriculars which were exclusively funded by my parents. Yes he helped with dishes during the week and would keep his space tidy. But as my schedule became much more flexible due to my school schedule, my expectations around the house became much higher than his. Even though I paid 200 a month on gas, 50 a month for insurance and 50 a month for the phone bill, and he paid nothing for his car, insurance, phone, gas, nothing. So you would think he would be expected to help in the house more but no. Also, James’s behavior towards Scott mimicked my parents and so all babysitting responsibilities fell on me as they couldn’t be trusted alone together. I was rarely if ever paid for my cleaning or babysitting services as it was my responsibility as their eldest child. They would also consistently judge me for my weight, cloths, hair, hobbies, etc. Why did I think it was a good idea to get fast food? I clearly didn’t need it. They would “outfit check me” to make sure the outfits I wore were feminine enough because the way I look effected their reputation and I couldn’t be trusted. I was not allowed to cut my hair after their tantrum over it. As for my hobbies, I stopped playing sports in middle school as I am very short (currently 5 foot even) and was unable to keep up with my peers. However my interest in video games and cartoons wasn’t feminine enough and they proceeded to compare me to my best friend Grace because she was skinnier and liked more feminine things than I did which hurt a lot. Another thing for context, I have PCOS. It’s an endocrine disorder that heavily effects your metabolism and hormones, which in turn severely effected my weight, however my parents never acknowledged it and again made everything my fault. So from what I wore, what I ate, who I hung out with and what I enjoyed doing was constantly criticized, scrutinized and eventually controlled by my family for years. On top of everything else, I was done. I was 18, I had resaved the thousand I paid my family and knew I was at a place where I didn’t need them and was tired of being treated like shit. So I left.
The night I moved out was a total shit show. I had rallied Dean and my other friend, let’s call them Rita (18NB), and they helped me form a plan. When I returned home, Dean and Rita would be on their way. I would pack everything that belonged to me or I felt they would let me take, and prep the bags outside. After Rita arrived I went to try and explain to my parents that I would be leaving and explain calmly why. In a perfect world, we would have had a long deep talk, and things would have ended alright. That is far, far from what happened. They immediately starting screaming, and took my phone and car keys as both belonged to them, which I calmly handed over. Rita was there for emotional support, and put themselves between me and my parents as they got more angry and seemed to be turning aggressive. After that, my father called the police and claimed that there was an intruder in their home trying to take their child. Yeah. Complete bullshit- which to this day I’m surprised they were never charged with falsifying a 911 call. They screamed at Rita to get out of their home and was screaming that I was throwing away everything and I needed to reconsider. I ignored them and attempted to calmly walk out, and my parents attempted to barricade the doors while harassing Rita to leave. Because Rita is incredible and one of my closest friends now, they refused to leave without me which was very calming. While my parents were distracted yelling at them, I slipped out through the garage. My mother saw this and then grabbed me, attempting to drag me inside by my arm. Rita saw this and assisted me in getting her off me, and after doing so we continued to walk towards Dean’s car where he was waiting for us. He figured it would be best if my family didn’t see him for the time being as they would definitely lose their minds at seeing his face. My parents continued screaming and then the cops arrived. They were quite confused at first because they had been sent to deal with a potential kidnapping, only to see two grown adults throwing a tantrum because their adult child didn’t want to live with them anymore. That night was honestly so insane I could write three more pages about everything they said and did. The most notable events were first when my mother tried to explain to the police that because I was her child, she was allowed to put her hands on me, which they humorously informed her was not the case. The next was when James came home from theater rehearsal, to which my parents told them that I was abandoning our family. He was an emotional wreck through all of it, and to this day has told me that until I “fix” things with our parents he is not okay with having any form of relationship with me. Throughout all of this Scott was in his room, and I was allowed to give him one last hug before leaving. The final and most notable thing, was as the cops allowed my boyfriend, Rita and I to leave, my father threatened violence towards my boyfriend and accused him of "taking advantage of his underage daughter," which is just ridiculous as we are practically the same age, and anything we had done together was consensual and reserved for after I turned 18. Another thing my parents did was go through each bag I had packed and took everything they felt belonged to them, including the laptop provided to me by my high school, which they hilariously were made to give back to me several days later as it was not theirs and they had no right to take it. They tried claiming they were giving it to me out of the kindness of their hearts, but that bullshit meant nothing as after I informed the school of their behavior, the school assured me they would be made to give it back. Another thing they threatened to do as I left was pull me out of high school, which I was assured by the police they were not capable of doing as I was 18. The police were for the most part annoyed with my parents, tired of their bs and told me I seemed to be a capable young woman and wished me the best of luck. My parents had tried to ask the police to say I was mentally unstable for the time being so I wouldn’t be allowed to leave, as their “she’s still in high school” excuse didn’t do anything. You see, as my father is an influential church figure and had friends in the police force, he thought they would be on his side but was sorely mistaken as the chief told him they wouldn’t be doing him any favors. And with that, I was free.
My boyfriend's family has been nothing but unconditionally kind and supportive and have accepted me as part of their family which has been a huge blessing in all of this. I am in contact with my father’s sister and his father, my aunt and grandpa, and as I have expressed my unhappiness at home, they are supportive of me as well. However, as my aunt lives further away and my grandpa is not in the best place to have me live with him, I have been with my boyfriend's family since I left home in October. I have a lot more I could say but I already feel like there are way too many parts here and so for now I’ll leave it at this. So yeah, AITA for moving out after I was treated like shit for years while witnessing the mistreatment of my sibling?
2024.05.15 23:42 sleetnotsnow How does the silver iPad Pro m4 look with the new Magic Keyboard in black?
So I got the silver iPad Pro 13 M4 and I’m thinking of getting the new Magic Keyboard. But I’m concerned whether the outside of the white Magic Keyboard would get dirty quickly. Also I love the combination of the silver iPad and a black case. The only thing is that the inside of the new Magic Keyboard is now made of aluminum and I’m not sure if it would look weird with the silver aluminum of the iPad. Has anyone seen such a combo in person or has a picture they can share? Thank you.
submitted by sleetnotsnow to ipad [link] [comments]
2024.05.15 23:42 larakf Vlog Recap: Meeting Our Son For The First Time. (live birth)
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yewtu.be please! Take a cut of this lowly anticipated peighdeigh.
24 hours before the birth: Cole was shirtless in his driveway; Colonsac are talking about how weird it is to put a car seat in the car. Really, on your 4th biological kid Cole? You legitimately own your own version of an Amazon delivery truck to haul around your litter, this is not novel or weird or a flex. It’s just what you do when you have a baby.
They state this is probably the start of their last baby vlog as Cole throws the seat in the car. Sac states they won’t put the baby in like that and not to worry. Newsflash, assholes: We are actually more concerned about the child labor and exploitation!
Sac spends some time cuddling Sunday because she is soon to no longer to be the littlest. They sing “You are my sunshine” and some Jesus loves me song. The baby talk from the childlike adults is gross. Just talk normal, idiots.
Cole is with P and tells her that Mommy-Daddy are waking up early to get the baby out. Sav is with Z lamenting that it’s the last night he will be her onlyboy low wage earner. The grandmomager Gigi is spending the night to watch over E and the other kids they have (that’s likely how she thinks of them too).
At the hospital, Sac is gowned and they’re inducing. Cole is petting Sac as he asks her how she’s doing. She isn’t hurting yet but wants her epidural.
Sac had a reaction to her epidural that caused her blood pressure to plummet (hypotension). During the epidural, she jumped and became numb quickly. Not to minimize what probably felt scary, but this is a fairly common reaction/side effect of epidurals. I’m sure it was scary. That said, Colon presents it all with sad-sad music and text slides that paint a much more dire picture of the situation. Essentially, this can be a pretty common reaction and Sac had never experienced before. But it ain’t a LabRat birth vlog if it doesn’t exploit a crisis, so… Sac was out of it but comes back to. Now she will have a 2nd epidural. Cole says an emergency c-section is on the table…but honestly they’re inducing so…it always is, every time.
Contractions are ramping up and all is well in LabRat land. All their kids have been born in the 2 am or pm hour, but they’re not sure if 5 will make it in time (it’s 2:10 pm at the time). Sac needs to get to work and starts pushing.
Colon says this is insane as if he’s never seen labor occur before. He pans back and forth between selfie shots of himself and Sac. 5 is born, a big boy per Colon, and Sac is back in her baby haze. The baby does look huge. Christian rock plays in the background. Colon asks her if it feels weird this is probably the last time she’s doing this, and she gives a reluctant yes. Colon FaceTimes the litter at home, and it ends on a preview of next time: the brood comes to visit.
Typical LabRats and typical baby vlog. We are still a few videos away from a name and they have been tight lipped according to sources in the know.
So there you have it. Happy Peighdeigh to Colonsac and welcome to 5.
submitted by larakf to LaBrantFamSnark [link] [comments]
yewtu.be please! Take a cut of this lowly anticipated peighdeigh.
24 hours before the birth: Cole was shirtless in his driveway; Colonsac are talking about how weird it is to put a car seat in the car. Really, on your 4th biological kid Cole? You legitimately own your own version of an Amazon delivery truck to haul around your litter, this is not novel or weird or a flex. It’s just what you do when you have a baby.
They state this is probably the start of their last baby vlog as Cole throws the seat in the car. Sac states they won’t put the baby in like that and not to worry. Newsflash, assholes: We are actually more concerned about the child labor and exploitation!
Sac spends some time cuddling Sunday because she is soon to no longer to be the littlest. They sing “You are my sunshine” and some Jesus loves me song. The baby talk from the childlike adults is gross. Just talk normal, idiots.
Cole is with P and tells her that Mommy-Daddy are waking up early to get the baby out. Sav is with Z lamenting that it’s the last night he will be her only
At the hospital, Sac is gowned and they’re inducing. Cole is petting Sac as he asks her how she’s doing. She isn’t hurting yet but wants her epidural.
Sac had a reaction to her epidural that caused her blood pressure to plummet (hypotension). During the epidural, she jumped and became numb quickly. Not to minimize what probably felt scary, but this is a fairly common reaction/side effect of epidurals. I’m sure it was scary. That said, Colon presents it all with sad-sad music and text slides that paint a much more dire picture of the situation. Essentially, this can be a pretty common reaction and Sac had never experienced before. But it ain’t a LabRat birth vlog if it doesn’t exploit a crisis, so… Sac was out of it but comes back to. Now she will have a 2nd epidural. Cole says an emergency c-section is on the table…but honestly they’re inducing so…it always is, every time.
Contractions are ramping up and all is well in LabRat land. All their kids have been born in the 2 am or pm hour, but they’re not sure if 5 will make it in time (it’s 2:10 pm at the time). Sac needs to get to work and starts pushing.
Colon says this is insane as if he’s never seen labor occur before. He pans back and forth between selfie shots of himself and Sac. 5 is born, a big boy per Colon, and Sac is back in her baby haze. The baby does look huge. Christian rock plays in the background. Colon asks her if it feels weird this is probably the last time she’s doing this, and she gives a reluctant yes. Colon FaceTimes the litter at home, and it ends on a preview of next time: the brood comes to visit.
Typical LabRats and typical baby vlog. We are still a few videos away from a name and they have been tight lipped according to sources in the know.
So there you have it. Happy Peighdeigh to Colonsac and welcome to 5.
2024.05.15 23:41 Sweet-Count2557 Maldives Island Honeymoon Package
 | Maldives Island Honeymoon Package Have you ever wondered if the Maldives Island Honeymoon Package truly lives up to its reputation as the ultimate romantic getaway? Well, let me assure you, it does not disappoint.From the moment you step off the plane and are whisked away to your luxurious resort, you'll be captivated by the beauty and tranquility of this paradise destination.But there is so much more to discover and experience beyond the pristine beaches and crystal-clear waters.So, join me as we embark on a journey to uncover the hidden gems and unique experiences that await you in the Maldives.Key TakeawaysThe Maldives offers luxury amenities, romantic experiences, and natural beauty for honeymooners.Four Seasons Resort Kuda Huraa is one of the resorts that offers a honeymoon package with round-trip airport transfers and a warm welcome with champagne.The best time to visit the Maldives for a honeymoon is during the dry season from December to March, with pleasant weather and minimal rainfall.Must-do activities on a Maldives honeymoon include diving expeditions, luxurious spa treatments, romantic sunset strolls, private candlelight dinners, and relaxing in overwater villas or beachfront villas.Overview of Maldives Island Honeymoon PackageThe Maldives Island Honeymoon Package offers couples a dreamy escape filled with luxury amenities, romantic experiences, and breathtaking natural beauty. This package, available at Four Seasons Resort Kuda Huraa, is the perfect choice for newlyweds looking to celebrate their love in a paradise setting.The package includes round-trip airport transfers, ensuring a smooth and hassle-free journey from the moment you arrive. Upon arrival at the resort, you'll be greeted with a warm welcome and a bottle of champagne, setting the tone for a truly memorable honeymoon.Each morning, wake up to a delicious breakfast spread that caters to all tastes and preferences. Indulge in a variety of cuisines, from local Maldivian dishes to international favorites, while enjoying stunning views of the crystal-clear turquoise waters.As part of the package, you and your partner will also be treated to a romantic candlelight dinner for two. Set against the backdrop of the Maldivian sunset, this intimate dining experience is sure to create lasting memories.The Maldives Island Honeymoon Package is based on a four-night stay, but additional nights can be added with breakfast included. This allows you to extend your honeymoon and fully immerse yourselves in the beauty and tranquility of the Maldives.Please note that availability of the package is subject to reservation and may vary depending on your arrival date and length of stay. Additional charges may apply for extra guests and may include mandatory property fees, service charges, or early departure fees.Choose the Maldives Island Honeymoon Package and embark on a romantic journey filled with luxury, love, and breathtaking natural surroundings.Top Honeymoon Resorts in the MaldivesNestled amidst the crystal-clear turquoise waters of the Maldives, you'll find a collection of top honeymoon resorts that offer couples an unforgettable romantic getaway. The Maldives is renowned for its breathtaking beauty, and these resorts are no exception. From the moment you step onto their shores, you'll be transported to a world of luxury and tranquility.One of the top honeymoon resorts in the Maldives is Meeru Maldives Resort Island. This resort offers overwater villas with stunning views of the ocean, ensuring that you and your loved one can immerse yourselves in the beauty of the surroundings. The staff at Meeru Maldives Resort Island are known for their exceptional service, ensuring that every aspect of your stay is taken care of.Another popular choice is Velassaru Maldives, which boasts beautiful and relaxing settings that are perfect for a honeymoon. The resort offers a range of dining options, allowing you to indulge in delicious cuisine while enjoying the stunning views. In addition, Velassaru Maldives offers excellent facilities, including a spa where you can pamper yourselves and a diving center for those seeking adventure.If you're looking for a quiet and intimate atmosphere, Hurawalhi Island Resort is an ideal choice. This resort is known for its peaceful ambiance, making it perfect for couples who want to escape the hustle and bustle of everyday life. With its exceptional ratings, Hurawalhi Island Resort promises a truly memorable honeymoon experience.Coco Palm Dhuni Kolhu and Ellaidhoo Maldives by Cinnamon are also highly recommended honeymoon resorts in the Maldives. Both offer stunning natural beauty, excellent staff, and a range of activities to keep you entertained.When it comes to planning your dream honeymoon in the Maldives, these top resorts offer everything you could possibly desire. So, why wait? Start creating memories that will last a lifetime at these incredible Maldives honeymoon resorts.All-Inclusive Honeymoon Package SpecialsImmerse yourselves in the ultimate romantic experience with the all-inclusive honeymoon package specials, offering a perfect blend of luxury, relaxation, and indulgence. When it comes to planning your dream honeymoon in the Maldives, there's no better option than these exclusive packages.Picture this: you and your loved one arriving at the Four Seasons Resort Kuda Huraa, where you'll be greeted with warm smiles and a refreshing drink. As part of the package, you'll enjoy round-trip airport transfers, ensuring a hassle-free journey from the moment you step foot in the Maldives.Your accommodation will be nothing short of extraordinary. The all-inclusive honeymoon package grants you access to the resort's overwater villas, boasting stunning views of the azure waters and direct access to the ocean. Imagine waking up to the gentle lapping of waves and falling asleep to the soothing sound of the sea.Indulge in daily breakfast as you start your days in paradise. Savor a delectable spread of international and local cuisines, ensuring you have the energy to explore the island or simply relax by the beach. And to make your honeymoon even more memorable, a bottle of champagne will be waiting for you in your villa upon arrival.As the sun sets, embark on a romantic journey with a candlelight dinner for two. Enjoy a sumptuous meal under the starlit sky, surrounded by the sounds of nature and the gentle sea breeze. It's the perfect opportunity to toast to your love and create memories that will last a lifetime.Please note that additional nights beyond the four-night stay are inclusive of breakfast only. Inclusions for additional guests are available for an additional charge. The package is subject to availability at the time of reservation and may or may not include applicable mandatory property fees, gratuities, or taxes. Rates are per room, per night, and early departure fees may apply.Make your honeymoon in the Maldives an unforgettable experience with the all-inclusive honeymoon package specials. It's time to celebrate your love in the most extraordinary way possible.Best Time to Visit the Maldives for HoneymoonTo ensure a truly unforgettable honeymoon in the Maldives, it's important to consider the best time to visit this tropical paradise. The ideal time for a luxury honeymoon in the Maldives is during the dry season, which runs from December to March. During this time, the weather is pleasant with minimal rainfall, making it perfect for outdoor activities and beach relaxation. You can bask in the warm sunshine and enjoy the crystal-clear turquoise waters without worrying about sudden downpours.On the other hand, the wet season, from May to September, isn't recommended for a honeymoon trip. This period experiences more rain, which can dampen your plans and limit your outdoor activities. If you dream of a picture-perfect honeymoon with clear skies and gentle breezes, it's best to avoid the wet season.When planning your honeymoon in the Maldives, consider booking a package that includes transfers to your chosen hotel. The North and South Ari atolls are easily accessible from the capital, Male, and are home to luxurious resorts that cater specifically to honeymooners. These resorts offer a secluded and romantic luxury experience, allowing you to embrace newly wedded bliss and indulge in intimate moments with your loved one.Nature enthusiasts will also find the Maldives to be a paradise for exploration. The Ari Atoll, in particular, is home to 80 islands and offers opportunities to witness magnificent wildlife, such as whale sharks. You can embark on thrilling excursions to observe these gentle giants in their natural habitat or simply immerse yourself in the stunning flora that the Maldives has to offer.Romantic Islands to Explore in the MaldivesAs we continue our journey through the Maldives, let's now set our sights on the romantic islands that await exploration in this tropical paradise. These islands are the perfect destinations for couples looking to spend their honeymoon in a picturesque and romantic setting.Here are some of the most romantic islands in the Maldives that you should explore during your honeymoon package:Meeru Island: This secluded oasis offers a truly romantic experience with its overwater villas and stunning views. Imagine waking up to the sound of waves gently crashing against the shore, while enjoying a breathtaking sunrise from the comfort of your private villa. Meeru Island is also known for its pristine beaches and crystal-clear waters, perfect for a romantic stroll or a swim with your loved one.Maafushi Island: This tropical paradise is a haven for snorkeling enthusiasts and nature lovers. With its vibrant coral reefs and diverse marine life, Maafushi Island offers a unique opportunity to explore the underwater world hand in hand with your partner. The island is also home to romantic villas, where you can unwind after a day of adventure and immerse yourself in the tranquility of the surroundings.Embarking on an island hopping tour is another great way to discover the hidden tropical gems of the Maldives. From serene beaches to luxury accommodations, each island has its own unique charm that will make your honeymoon an unforgettable experience.Must-Do Activities on Your Maldives HoneymoonLet's dive into the unforgettable experiences that await you on your Maldives honeymoon, with a variety of must-do activities that will create cherished memories for you and your partner. From exploring vibrant reefs to indulging in luxurious spa treatments, the Maldives offers a range of experiences that are perfect for a romantic getaway.To start off your honeymoon, why not embark on a diving expedition to explore the ring-shaped reefs? Witness the vibrant marine life and colorful coral formations as you dive into the crystal-clear waters. This is a truly mesmerizing experience that will leave you in awe of the natural beauty of the Maldives.After a day of adventure, it's time to relax and unwind in your overwater villa. Indulge in back-to-back spa treatments, pampering yourselves with massages and other rejuvenating therapies. As you lounge in your villa, you can enjoy the stunning views of the turquoise waters, creating a sense of tranquility and bliss.For a romantic evening, take a stroll along the pristine beaches and watch the sunset hand in hand. To make the moment even more special, treat yourselves to a private candlelight dinner for two. Enjoy a delectable meal under the starry sky, creating unforgettable memories that will last a lifetime.If you prefer a quieter day, you can simply relax in your overwater villa, reading a book and sipping on a glass of champagne. The peaceful atmosphere and breathtaking views will make for a truly serene experience.Lastly, don't forget to explore the local culture by embarking on an island hopping tour. Discover hidden tropical gems, rejuvenate with a couple spa therapy, and explore local markets to get a taste of the Maldivian way of life.Exotic Water and Beach Villa StaysImmerse yourself in the ultimate luxury of an exotic water or beach villa stay in the Maldives, where stunning views, world-class amenities, and unparalleled relaxation await you and your partner.Indulge in the romantic ambiance of overwater villas, perched above crystal-clear turquoise waters, or unwind in the serenity of beachfront villas, just steps away from pristine sandy beaches.Here are some reasons why these villa stays are the perfect choice for your Maldives honeymoon:Breathtaking Overwater Villas:Experience the epitome of luxury as you stay in an overwater villa, with direct access to the ocean. Watch colorful marine life swim beneath your villa's glass floor or take a dip in your private infinity pool overlooking the azure waters.Wake up to panoramic views of the Maldivian sunrise from your spacious outdoor deck, equipped with sun loungers and a daybed. Enjoy the privacy and seclusion offered by these exclusive villas, ensuring a truly intimate experience for you and your loved one.Tranquil Beachfront Villas:Immerse yourself in the beauty of nature as you stay in a beachfront villa, surrounded by lush tropical gardens and the soothing sound of the ocean waves. Take a leisurely stroll along the sandy beaches hand in hand, and feel the soft sand between your toes.Relax in your own private plunge pool, nestled within the confines of your villa. Unwind on the spacious outdoor terrace, where you can soak up the sun or enjoy a romantic candlelit dinner under the starry night sky.Whether you choose an overwater villa or a beachfront villa, your stay in the Maldives promises to be an unforgettable experience. From the luxurious amenities to the breathtaking surroundings, these villas offer the perfect setting for a romantic and rejuvenating honeymoon.How to Reach the Maldives for Your HoneymoonTo start your Maldives honeymoon, you'll need to plan your journey to this breathtaking destination. Luckily, the Maldives is well-connected to several countries, making it easily accessible for travelers. Flights from countries like India, Sri Lanka, China, and Thailand provide regular access to the Maldives, ensuring a smooth and convenient travel experience.Upon arrival in the Maldives, resorts often arrange seaplane or boat transfers to transport guests to their island accommodations. This adds an extra touch of luxury and excitement to your journey as you glide over the crystal-clear waters or sail through the turquoise lagoons, immersing yourself in the beauty of the Maldives.For those traveling to the Four Seasons Resort Kuda Huraa, the package includes round-trip airport transfers by shared speedboat between Velana International Airport and the resort. This ensures a hassle-free journey, allowing you to sit back, relax, and soak in the stunning views of the Maldivian archipelago.It's essential to consider the location and accessibility of the chosen resort. The North and South Ari atolls, for example, are easily reachable from the capital and house luxurious accommodations. By selecting a resort that's conveniently located, you can minimize travel time and maximize your time in paradise.The Maldives is a perfect honeymoon destination with its tropical climate and secluded luxury. In addition to the beautiful beaches and vibrant marine life, the Maldives offers romantic experiences such as private island dinners and indulgent spa treatments. So, get ready to embark on a journey of a lifetime and create unforgettable memories on your Maldives honeymoon.Planning Tips for a Perfect Maldives HoneymoonWhen it comes to planning a perfect Maldives honeymoon, there are a few key points to consider.First, researching and selecting the best resorts for honeymoon is essential to ensure a luxurious and romantic experience.Additionally, looking into the range of romantic activities and experiences available, such as private island dinners or spa treatments, can add that extra touch of romance to your getaway.Lastly, don't forget to pack the essentials for the Maldives, like sunscreen and swimwear, to fully enjoy the stunning beaches and crystal-clear waters.Best Resorts for HoneymoonFor the perfect Maldives honeymoon, look no further than the top-rated resorts that offer luxury overwater bungalows, stunning views, and unforgettable experiences.Here are two of the best resorts for honeymoon in the Maldives:Four Seasons: This world-renowned resort is known for its unparalleled luxury and impeccable service. With overwater bungalows that feature private pools and direct access to the crystal-clear waters, you and your partner can enjoy ultimate privacy and relaxation. Indulge in a couples' massage at the spa or dine under the stars at one of the resort's exquisite restaurants.Hurawalhi Island: Nestled in the Lhaviyani Atoll, Hurawalhi Island Resort is a haven for honeymooners. With its breathtaking coral reefs and vibrant marine life, this resort is perfect for couples who love diving or snorkeling. Enjoy candlelit dinners on the beach, take a sunset cruise, or simply relax in your luxurious villa with panoramic views of the Indian Ocean.These resorts offer the perfect blend of luxury, romance, and breathtaking natural beauty, making them the ideal choice for a honeymoon in the Maldives.Romantic Activities and ExperiencesAs honeymooners, we are eager to continue our exploration of the Maldives by immersing ourselves in the romantic activities and experiences that will make our perfect honeymoon even more unforgettable. The Maldives offers a plethora of romantic activities that cater to every couple's desires. To make our evenings truly special, we can indulge in a candlelight dinner for two guests, complete with a bottle of champagne upon arrival. The ambience and delicious cuisine will create a truly magical experience. Additionally, we can take advantage of the stunning overwater villas with breathtaking views and serene beaches at top-rated honeymoon resorts like Velassaru Maldives and Hurawalhi Island Resort. These luxurious accommodations provide the perfect backdrop for a romantic getaway. For adventure-seeking couples, we can engage in activities such as scuba diving, snorkeling, and whale or dolphin watching, all within the crystal-clear waters of the Maldives. Exploring the diverse wildlife and nature of the Maldives is a thrilling experience that we won't want to miss. To complete our honeymoon experience, we can embark on epic island hopping tours, indulge in luxurious spa treatments, and take romantic walks on the pristine beaches. These activities offer an unforgettable experience for honeymooners, leaving us with cherished memories of our time in the Maldives.Romantic ActivitiesDescriptionCandlelight DinnerEnjoy a romantic dinner for two guests, complete with a bottle of champagne upon arrival.Overwater VillasStay in stunning overwater villas with breathtaking views and serene beaches.Wildlife and Nature ExplorationWitness whale sharks in their natural habitat and explore the UNESCO World Biosphere Reserve in Baa Atoll.Adventure ActivitiesEngage in scuba diving, snorkeling, and whale or dolphin watching in the crystal-clear waters.With these romantic activities and experiences, our honeymoon in the Maldives will be nothing short of extraordinary.Packing Essentials for MaldivesTo ensure a perfect Maldives honeymoon, it's crucial to pack the essential items that will keep us comfortable and prepared for the tropical paradise. Here are some packing essentials for our Maldives getaway at the luxurious Maldives Resort:Clothing:Lightweight and breathable clothing suitable for the tropical climate.Swimwear for enjoying the crystal-clear waters and stunning beaches.Sun Protection:Sunscreen to protect our skin from the strong sun rays.Sunglasses and a wide-brimmed hat to shield our eyes and face.Beach Accessories:A good pair of water shoes for walking on the beach and exploring the shallow waters.Snorkeling gear and an underwater camera to capture the vibrant marine life.Convenience:A compact and portable beach bag to carry our essentials while exploring the beautiful beaches.With these packing essentials, we'll be fully prepared to make the most of our Maldives honeymoon package.Unique Dining Experiences for Couples in the MaldivesGet ready to indulge in unforgettable culinary experiences during your honeymoon in the Maldives.Picture yourselves enjoying a romantic beachfront dinner, with the sand beneath your toes and the sound of the waves in the background.Or, take it to the next level and embark on an underwater dining adventure, surrounded by vibrant marine life.And for a truly unique experience, why not have a private island picnic, where you can savor delicious food while basking in the beauty of your own secluded paradise.These dining experiences will create cherished memories that you and your partner will treasure forever.Romantic Beachfront DinnersIndulge in the ultimate romantic experience with a private candlelight dinner for two on the pristine beaches of the Maldives, where the gentle waves and breathtaking sunset create an enchanting ambiance. As part of the Maldives Island Honeymoon Package, this unique dining experience is designed to provide couples with an unforgettable and intimate evening.Here's what you can expect:Immerse yourselves in the beauty of the island as you dine under the stars, with the sound of the ocean as your background music.Savor a delectable gourmet meal prepared by talented chefs, using the freshest local ingredients to create a feast for the senses.Enjoy a bottle of champagne, thoughtfully provided in your villa upon arrival, to set the tone for a luxurious and romantic experience.With round-trip airport transfers and daily breakfast also included, this package ensures a seamless and stress-free honeymoon. Escape to the Maldives and create memories that will last a lifetime.Underwater Dining ExperiencesImmerse yourselves in the extraordinary and enchanting world beneath the waves with a unique underwater dining experience for couples in the Maldives.Picture this: an overwater dinner for two in the Indian Ocean, surrounded by the mesmerizing beauty of the marine life and the stunning underwater scenery.As you descend into the depths of the ocean, you'll be greeted by a candlelit table, creating a romantic and intimate atmosphere.Savor the delectable cuisine specially prepared for you, while being mesmerized by the vibrant colors and graceful movements of the aquatic creatures.To add a touch of luxury, a bottle of champagne will be waiting for you in your villa upon arrival, making your underwater dining experience even more unforgettable.This one-of-a-kind adventure promises to create lasting memories as you indulge in a truly unique and breathtaking setting.Private Island PicnicsEscape to a secluded paradise in the Maldives and embark on a culinary adventure unlike any other with private island picnics. Offering couples a unique and unforgettable dining experience, private island picnics are a must-try for couples.Exclusivity: Private Island Picnics provide couples with the opportunity to enjoy a custom-prepared picnic on their very own private island, away from the hustle and bustle of the world. It's a truly intimate setting, perfect for creating unforgettable memories.Romantic Setting: Surrounded by breathtaking natural beauty and the tranquil ambiance of the Maldives, couples can savor a delectable meal against the stunning backdrop of the Maldivian islands. The serene atmosphere adds an extra touch of romance to the experience.With personalized service and attention to detail, Private Island Picnics are the perfect way for couples to celebrate special occasions or simply enjoy a romantic escape. Enhancing the honeymoon package, this private and luxurious culinary adventure promises to create cherished moments that will last a lifetime.Why the Maldives Is the Ultimate Honeymoon DestinationThe Maldives beckons newlyweds with its secluded luxury, providing the ultimate destination for couples to embrace their post-wedding bliss. As one of the best honeymoon destinations in the world, the Maldives offers an unparalleled experience for couples seeking a romantic getaway. From the moment you arrive, you'll be greeted with a bottle of champagne in your villa, setting the tone for an unforgettable stay.The Maldives is renowned for its overwater villas, which offer breathtaking views of the crystal-clear turquoise waters. Imagine waking up to the sound of gentle waves and stepping out onto your private deck to enjoy a cup of coffee while taking in the panoramic views. In the evening, indulge in a private candlelight dinner for two under the stars, creating memories that will last a lifetime.For adventurous couples, the Maldives has plenty to offer. Dive into an underwater paradise with scuba diving and snorkeling adventures, where you can explore vibrant coral reefs teeming with marine life. If you're lucky, you might even spot majestic whales or playful dolphins during a whale or dolphin watching excursion.If relaxation is what you seek, the Maldives has you covered. Pamper yourselves with luxurious spa treatments that will leave you feeling rejuvenated and refreshed. Take romantic walks on pristine white sandy beaches, hand in hand with your loved one. Explore the exotic islands through island hopping tours, where you can discover hidden gems and immerse yourselves in the local culture.When it comes to the ultimate honeymoon destination, the Maldives truly stands out. With its secluded luxury, adventurous activities, and serene beauty, it offers the perfect setting for couples to celebrate their love and create memories that will last a lifetime.Frequently Asked QuestionsHow Much Does a Honeymoon in Maldives Cost?When it comes to planning a honeymoon, the budget is always a factor. Luckily, there are affordable honeymoon destinations out there that offer unforgettable experiences.The cost of a honeymoon in the Maldives can vary depending on factors like the resort, package inclusions, and additional charges. However, there are options available that cater to different budgets.Whether you're looking for luxury or a more budget-friendly option, the Maldives offers a range of resorts to suit your needs.How Much Does a 7 Days Package Cost for a Couple in Maldives?When it comes to the cost of a 7-day package for a couple in Maldives, we've got you covered.Let's dive into the cost comparison and find the best time to visit this breathtaking destination.Whether you're dreaming of pristine beaches or vibrant marine life, the Maldives offers a honeymoon experience like no other.Is Maldives Good for Honeymoon?Yes, Maldives is absolutely perfect for honeymooners! With its secluded luxury and romantic experiences, it offers an ideal setting to embrace newly wedded bliss.The best time to visit Maldives for a honeymoon is from December to April, when the weather is perfect for island hopping and water sports.From romantic candlelit dinners on the beach to snorkeling in crystal-clear waters, Maldives offers a range of romantic activities that will make your honeymoon unforgettable.Is 3 Nights in Maldives Enough?Is 3 nights in the Maldives enough for a honeymoon? Well, it depends on what you're looking for. While some may say that a longer stay allows for a more relaxed and indulgent experience, 3 nights can still be a wonderful time to enjoy the beauty of the Maldives.During this short duration, you can make the most of activities like snorkeling, scuba diving, and kayaking. Plus, you can indulge in romantic experiences like a private dinner for two on a secluded island.ConclusionIn conclusion, the Maldives Island Honeymoon Package offers a dreamy escape for couples seeking a romantic getaway. With its luxurious resorts, breathtaking views, and exclusive amenities, it's no wonder that the Maldives is considered the ultimate honeymoon destination.Did you know that the Maldives is home to over 1,000 coral islands? This unique statistic showcases the abundance of natural beauty and opportunities for exploration that await honeymooners in this tropical paradise. submitted by Sweet-Count2557 to worldkidstravel [link] [comments] |
2024.05.15 23:36 Getting_Stronger2021 Not asking for follows, asking for n@me ideas for a cat stream that I will probably never make but i do like to toy around with the idea. Read below.
 | I have four cats. All rescues from the street that I rehabilitated. Three of them are American hood cats and one is a Chinese hood cat (yes, from China.) The Chinese one is the oldest by a just a couple of years but she is the smallest of the bunch at 7lbs. The Americans are 10lbs, 11lbs, and 18lbs. Here's the kicker. The Chinese one is the leader and I often joke and call her the regime leader or Chairman Mao as her name is Mao Mao (it basically means cat in chinese) she runs the house, if she wants to groom the other cats she will hold them down and make them submit. It's funny. Back to the point of the post, does anyone have any good n@mes that would highlight the Chinese aspect of this group. Here are a few I've thought up. Mao and her regime The regime Mao and friends Commie and crew submitted by Getting_Stronger2021 to cats [link] [comments] Can you guess who the Chinese cat is in the picture (answer at the end) Notes: All 4 cats get along fantastically and I want to share them. I'm not delusional, I don't think the stream would make money. But I think it would spread smiles. Maybe encourage cat ownership and dispel some lies about cats and multi cat homes. These cats are anything but aloof. They are in your face friendly. One even meows incessantly until you hold her. Varying octaves that get louder and louder until she outwills you. She ALWAYS wins. I did not name Mao, a Chinese friend of mine did when I failed to do so as I was trying not to get attached so I could rehome her. This clearly did not happen and when I moved back to the states she came with Answer: The one with her mouth open in front. |