Poetry moving in older age

Talking about older women/younger men relationships

2013.10.25 14:59 grumpycateight Talking about older women/younger men relationships

READ THE FAQ & RULES BEFORE POSTING OR COMMENTING! A safe space to trade experiences, frustrations, worries, analyze cultural reactions, or just chat with fellow cougars and cubs. Working definition: a cougacub relationship is one where the woman (cougar) is a woman of 40 who at least 10 years older than the man (cub) or woman (kitten). A woman under 40 is a Puma.
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2008.11.19 03:15 Barcelona

Una comunitat per a persones que viuen a Barcelona. /// A community for people living in Barcelona. /// Una comunidad para personas que residen en Barcelona.
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2016.04.11 07:28 crocomut OldSkaters

This subreddit is for the older skaters (anyone above 30). If you are a new old skater you are in the right place as well. You can post your videos, give and receive tips on tricks you're having difficulty with, your new board setup, what you think would be good for a new skater to get and anything else you find relevant. Skaters of all skill levels are welcome. There is no age restriction as long as you are not posting your skating footage (See rules below before posting).
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2024.05.15 05:20 isisis Neighborhood kids bullying my daughter

I apologize in advance for the wall if text. I don't know what to do about this. I live in a small condo community with a number of my neighbors having kids close to my daughters age (8). Two girls are closest to her but a couple of years older. One was pretty good friends with my kid for a while, and the other I am honestly not a huge fan of because she's hot and cold and I could see bullying tendencies in her. But I let my kid decide who she wants to be friends with, and she's so social she wants to be friends with every kid she meets.
Recently, the friend decided she doesn't want to be friends with my daughter anymore. That in itself is fine, but what isn't fine is how she treats her now. I had to block her phone number from my daughter's watch so she would stop sending horrible text messages and calling her to talk to her in her home language which we don't understand, so I can only imagine what she's saying to her. The other girl and this girl are now besties and harass my daughter every time they see her. If they see my daughter, they scream and run away like she's diseased or something, and they ding dong ditched our house the other day. I saw them running away and followed them to one of their homes to confront their mom and tell her that her daughter needs to stay away from us. I was so upset I was shaking. It probably sounds ridiculous, but I have no tolerance for bullying, especially towards my child.
As far as I know, the bullying is just mean girl stuff, no physical contact or verbal abuse. But it's distressing for my daughter. She's set to go to the same school as them next year which she was really excited about, but after all of this she was in tears the other day. She's so scared to go to school with them now, and it's heartbreaking. It makes me so so angry and I don't know what to do. I've searched online for advice but it mostly focuses on helping my daughter deal with it, rather than preventing or stopping it. Obviously I can't control what these kids do, but there has to be something I can do.
If anyone has advice I would really appreciate it. Even typing this out is making me angry. I can't just move, and it's not like I can call the police for this. If they're parents won't stop them what can I do?
submitted by isisis to Mommit [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 05:20 SatisfactionLeather7 Valarr Velaryon, Raya Stark - Lord and Lady of Driftmark.

PC

Reddit Account: Satisfactionleather7
Discord Tag: CertifiedEveSimp
Name and House: Valarr velaryon
Age: 48
Cultural Group: Valyrian
Appearance: A tall man, but not a large man, standing at six feet, with thick arms and a firm stance, one would expect him to be the visaghe of strength, but more often than not, his bright clothes and feathered hat are simply covering for his drunken state and constant wide smile, though his rugged handsomeness helps.
Trait: Strong
Skill(s): Swords, Essosi Blademaster (e), Dual Wielding, daggers
Talent(s): Singing, Sailing, gambling
Negative Trait(s):
Starting Title(s): Lord of Driftmark, Lord of the Tides, Master of Ships
Starting Location: Opening Event
Alternate Characters: n/a

AC

Name and House: Raya Stark
Age: 45
Cultural Group: First Man
Appearance: Marked by slight lines of age, the lady Stark has tanned at sea, her freckles now less pronounced, but her beauty holding strong just as her sense of fashion and love for hats has done the same. Dressed usually in darker tones than her husband, she is still a woman who looks fresh from sea no matter the occasion.
Trait: Mariner
Skill(s): Admiral (e), scrutinous
Talent(s): Sailing, Singing, Caligraphy
Negative Trait(s):
Starting Title(s): Lady of Driftmark
Starting Location: Opening Event
Alternate Characters: n/a
---

Timeline

23 BCE - Valarr Velaryon is born on Driftmark to a cousin of the existing lords of driftmark under Daemon Velaryon. He is never expected to find any power of his own.
20 BCE - Raya Stark is born, a cousin to Torrhen Stark, the king in the North and soon to be the Kneeler. It was said that the first thing she did when she was given the ability to crawl, was to attempt to climb into a bath on her own.
15 BCE - Valarr, at age eight, is brought on his first voyage by his father. The young Valarr is taken on a trading trip to Braavos with his father and the young boy soon becomes enamored with the concept of the sea and the beauty of the world. Beginning his love for travel and sailing.
12 BCE - In White Harbour, where Raya's family had moved, she too takes her first voyage, alongside her father, the tomboyish girl leaves the city and learns ship and sail on a voyage to Duskendale and then Oldtown.
9 BCE - Valarr, now 14, an experienced sailor and well-trained in the sword begins charting his own small trips from Driftmark to trade partners on Westeros. These voyages are only of a few days at best, but largely they are of great success and the man begins building up a regular crew of men and women to serve on his vessels.
7 BCE - Across the sea, Raya Stark begins working with her own small scale shipping adventures, sailing along the coast of the North and down to Gulltown, also in the process she finds herself carrying out anti-piracy actions for her cousin... or rather she is upon the ships that do so and she rambunctiously states she is in fact leading the party. The sailors with her humour her.
5 BCE - Valarr Velaryon begins travelling through Essos. He spends three years moving about through Essos, this first voyage largely spent travelling between Driftmark and the Free cities, fighting in Braavos, Pentos and Tyrosh specifically, but come his latest return home in 3 BCE, he is given word of Aegon's plans for Westeros. Daemon recruits him to fight in the war, and act as a captain in the Velaryon fleet.
2 BCE - Daemon Velaryon sends Valarr north to White harbour to negotiate with the Starks and bring them into the kingdom peacefully, but he is shut out quickly and instead spends time in White Harbour assessing the fleet of the manderlys. There he meets Raya Stark while he competes in a smaller tourney. The two quickly fall in love, and marry. Valarr then returns home to Driftmark with his new wife, and later that year his first son is born.
1 BCE - Valarr deploys to the mainland to fight in the field for Aegon, doing battle under numerous engagements and distinguishing himself well. Meanwhile, his wife Raya takes to her new home well, and leads a small detachment of the Velaryon fleet in battle.
1 AC - Valarr, upon his duty in the war finishing, takes his wife with him back to Essos, and for the next several years he travels the continent proper, his wife and his growing family accompanying him and at times being left back on Driftmark. At times being raised at sea on his travels, at others in Essos.
3 AC - Rhaegal Velaryon, the second son, is born.
4 AC - Valarr, while travelling in Essos, meets a man with a mysterious black Arakh. Over drinks they speak and the man reveals its history to him as some ritual required for a new owner to claim the weapon. Having bested the man in an arena the day before, the man requests a duel to give over the weapon. In the fight, the stranger is wounded, but Valarr no less takes him to receive healing. The man passess on his sword, and Valarr comes into possession of a black sword by the name of
5 AC - Laena Velaryon, his first daughter is born.
6 AC - Viserra Velaryon, the youngest child is born.
7-14 AC - Valarr's adventures in Essos continue and continue to bring him great renown and wealth in the East through adventuring and selling his sword and ship to the highest bidder. However, during this period, he visits Asshai and for fun seeks to have his fortune read. In doing so, a masked figure tells him that he must return to his home, for "the seahorse shall burn seven years after the dragon drowns." At first he does not find any logic to it, and then he hears of the death of Aegon by a Riverlander plot. And for years he contemplates the words, eventually choosing to return home to Driftmark.
15 AC - The kingswood catastrophe wipes out the line of Daemon Velaryon, and when the next Velaryon was needed, Valarr was there on the island and was elevated to be the new lord of the tides from his new keep on Driftmark, High Tide.
16-24 AC - Between the years of 16-24 AC, Valarr's travels east slow down, and he begins to spend more time in King's landing and Driftmark, namely he takes a liking to hosting tourneys on the island regularly, and enjoys the betting and the sport that it brings, competing himself numerous times.
20 AC - Partakes in the Eastern Wooing.
23 AC - Raya Stark negotiates Laena Velaryon marrying Maelor Velaryon's firstborn son. Laena is forced to break off a romance with Dickon bracken, though she knew their romance was doomed already.
--
Family Tree
---
NPCS
Laena Velaryon - master at arms.
Maegor Velaryon - Ship Captain
submitted by SatisfactionLeather7 to ITRPCommunity [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 05:19 Dependent_Rent Does it ever get better?

I’m male, 19 years old, and have only ever been in one relationship. This was almost two years ago. She’s a good friend of mine now, but more on that later. She never wanted to kiss, physical affection revolted her, so we never kissed once. We hardly ever held hands and when it came to the subject of sex, she claimed she would never be interested in it, not now, not never. So she broke up with me, because she knew that I believed sex was an important part of a relationship, and she couldn’t give that to me.
She’s dating my best friend now, they’ve been together a year and a half, and for a great deal of time, it broke me. I was inconsolable for the better part of a year. And they have sex. Frequent and loving sex. And for a long time I wondered why, why would she do it with him and not me. So in an ironic set of circumstances, I’m a virgin, and she’s not. But I’m not so upset by this anymore, they’re my two best friends and I’ve moved on.
But the loneliness and pining is what’s getting to me. At my age I can’t believe I haven’t experienced what I desire most. It’s killing me, genuinely eating me up from the inside, this longing is almost unbearable. I want to feel a human being holding me close, I want to love and to feel loved. I want intimacy, and for someone to see and love me at my most vulnerable, and I don’t think it’s fair that I have to be without it.
I match people on dating apps quite often but the conversation doesn’t lead anywhere, it’s hilarious. It’s almost intentional at this point, even if I get their socials and we talk for a couple days, they suddenly remember “oh I’m not really looking for anything.” Then why are you on the app? Why did you match with me and talk with me? And it’s not something I’m doing because I’m a self aware person and know when I make a blunder. I can’t leave this awkward spot, and I cry almost every night. It really isn’t fair, why do I have to miss out on this? Does it get better? Will I ever find love? It’s a reasonable expectation I think. Companionship shouldn’t be kept from me, it’s all I’ve ever wanted. Please help me, I don’t know how much longer I can live like this.
Tl/dr: The loneliness is killing me. I’m losing hope and steam, and I don’t know if I can keep living like this.
submitted by Dependent_Rent to self [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 05:18 oakenmirror How do you feel like you're part of a community?

I grew up moving around about every 3 years. Now that I'm older, around 30, I've continued that pattern. I don't know if I ever want to "put down roots." Out of everywhere I've lived, nowhere stands out as somewhere I'd like to stay.
I guess I just want to know how others feel about where they live. Whether they feel like they're part of a community or that they just live there? Whether they actively chose where they live or feel they are just a victim of circumstance in where they are?
submitted by oakenmirror to AskMen [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 05:15 One_Breakfast6153 Met a neighbor

This evening, I was moving a rosebush and planting some trumpet flowers in the flowerbed. A mom and her two little kids came walking by. The older kid was on a scooter. They looked like they were having a nice time.
I gave the kids some snapdragons and the little boy asked what I was doing (because I was digging up the rosebush). The little girl kept telling me hello all the way down the sidewalk. They were a nice friendly family - I hope they come by again.
submitted by One_Breakfast6153 to BenignExistence [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 05:15 socialtrends93 Baby boomers moving to Nursing Home Data

So basically this website shows the average ages people go into nursing homes. The baby boom began in 1946 so the oldest boomers are around 78 years old now meaning the nursing home boom is just starting. Obviously many baby boomers will be forced to sell their homes to move into nursing homes or live with family due to old age. This might explain why Florida has seen an increase in normal housing inventory lately.
Source Below
https://www.aplaceformom.com/senior-living-data/articles/average-age-nursing-home-residents
submitted by socialtrends93 to REBubble [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 05:15 Epic-Kitti I need to get this out.

I'm a 27 yr old, who feels kinda lost. Granted I have my 2 kids, a stable job, a wonderful boyfriend, and a supportive group of wonderful people in my life. I just found out that I'm pregnant and the family is excited. However I'm currently taking my abuser to court and it's been getting stalled. Multiple times. What I mean by stalled is that they keep pushing it off for one reason or another. I wanna give you guys some background before I ask my questions.
When I was 11 my biological father signed his rights away, gave me to my biological mother and (at that time) my stepdad, and left my life. I remember, on my birthday, the school threw a wonderful party for me. Then my dad picked me up from school early and we drove to a gas station miles away and I saw my biological mother for the first time since I was 8. My stepdad gave me gifts and I saw my dad signing something on the back of his car and handing it to my biological mother. We eventually got back to my bio mom's house (after a tire flying off the car and spending a night in a hotel room) and got settled. We lived in an old house and they converted the dinning room into a bedroom for me. So in order to get into the kitchen from the front room, they had to come through my room. Every night my stepdad would come by and run my head. Tracing over my hair from the front of my head to the end of my pixie cut hair. At that time I thought that this is what a dad who loves their kid does because my bio dad wasn't that affectionate. 6 months after we got home from the gas station, my stepdad adopted me. Since he was 14 years younger than my mom and only 10 years older than me, it was easy to get along with him. I saw him more as a friend than a father and my bio mom was distant so he'd be the one interacting with me. When I was 12 my bio mom and adoptive father used to check if I brushed my teeth by smelling my breath. My bio mom stopped doing it and asked my adoptive father to do it, so he was the main one that checked my breath. Once he joked about if I were to do it again that he'd kiss me. I told my adoptive father that I wasn't scared of him and he kissed me. The adult activities followed a few days after that. When I was 13, I had a boyfriend who I told that my adoptive father and I did adult things, because I wanted him to know that I knew about that world. My bf (at that time), let's call him Tod, informed me that my aunt needed to hear my stories. So I told her. I remember her face going pale for a moment and then she was back to her normal self. Since I was only at my aunt's house because me and Tod were picking out me a homecoming dress, we got in the car shortly after I told my aunt. She drove us (me and Tod) home and there was a white car there. I got taken into foster care until I was 14 (only spending the beginning of 8th grade in care). I felt so bad for talking about what happened between me and my adoptive father that I recanted what I had said and ended up being placed back in the house with my bio mother and adoptive father. The adult activities continued just a couple weeks after I got home. When I was 16, I ran away with a new bf. That bf got scary aggressive so I messaged my bio mom and told her I needed to come home. She told me she wasn't going to be there if I came back. I didn't believe her because she's lied to me multiple times before. I broke up with him. My adoptive father came to get me and got me back to the house. My bio mom ended up not being there. So for the next couple years, I still went to school, adult activities still continued, alcohol and drugs were introduced, physical violence started, more abusive language came out, and all of that my adoptive father made sure of. I found out I was 3 months pregnant when I was 18. I got kicked out. Keep in mind it was only me and my adoptive father in the house. I ended up getting myself an apartment and was able to make a little money by selling jewelry and crafts I made. All that time, I didn't understand that what he did to me was wrong. So when he showed up to my apartment with flowers and a card for mother's day(even though the baby wasn't born yet), I let him inside. My adoptive father apologized. The cycle started all over again except for the drugs and alcohol because of the baby. I gave birth and couldn't breastfeed so he started smoking green with me. My adoptive father caused a huge fight that cost me my apartment so I moved towns away into a friend's house. We will call her Bee. Bee had dated and had a kid with my brother and we were really close. I knew Bee since early highschool and she knew a lot of what I went through. I made friends there and Bee had my kicked out of their house so me and my first born moved into another friends house. I got beat there so I call my uncle to help me find a place. Unfortunately my uncle didn't know what my adoptive father had done so they showed up to pick me up together. We (me, son, and adoptive father) moved into adoptive grandma's house. The cycle started again. This time he was the only one who was allowed to drink and it was behind doors because Grandma was against it. I didn't even know until after. It was in that house, he disclosed to me that he used to peek through the slats of the wall of the bathroom while I showered when I was 11, and that he was the one to leave the vibrator on the counter for me to find. Adoptive grandma bought me and my adoptive father a house that needed some work on. Adoptive father attacked adoptive grandma so we got evicted and moved into that house alone. The house didn't have electricity or running water, but we were able to stay clean and comfortable because we knew how to survive in that environment, but even I can admit that's no way to live. Drugs and alcohol were common. Adoptive father also gave me(I don't think I have to say in what way) to several of his friends. One night, a friend of Bee's came over and hung out with us after my son fell asleep. The friend had brought alcohol over and we all had a few drinks. Adoptive father because angered and the friend left. My son woke up because of the yelling so I picked him up to comfort him. I should have left him there because what happened next I still hold a lot of hate towards myself for even though my son is perfectly fine now. Adoptive father became more and more upset by the minute so I moved so it'd put space between us. I moved to where there was a table between me and adoptive father. I'm still holding my son at that time. Adoptive father comes rushing towards the table and throws it out of the way. He swung at me and I turned my body thinking that I had to block the blow for hitting my son. I didn't turn quick enough and my son (only 1yrs old) had a red mark on his chest. Adoptive father paused for a moment in shock that he hit the baby and gave me enough time to put the baby down and grab my phone. I started to call my closest friend at that time (who was aware of my life story and was on call whenever I needed a safe place) but adoptive father grabbed my phone, hung up, and held me down until I told him I wouldn't leave the house. I waited until he was asleep and call my friend again. Minutes later me and my baby were in a car heading to safety. The last time I spoke directly to my adoptive father was when I was 21, and that was because he called me and asked if I pressed charges against him for hitting the baby. I told him, no I didn't but his bio dad (who he hated) was the one to talk to the cops and gave them pictures of my bruises. He spent 2 years in prison for assault and that was his third strike at that time. The states attorney found out that I had a child with my adoptive father and called me on the number I gave the cops. 4 years ago they opened a case of incest against him and have filed charges. The trials and sentencing dates have been postponed multiple times and the next courtdate is in July of this year. The last one was supposed to be in April, however the defense attorney was sick. 2 years ago, while I was in a lot of counseling appointments, I finally understood what grooming was and that my childhood and teenage years weren't supposed to happen. At least in a good family, the situations I was put in wouldn't have happened. I found out that my adoptive father married Bee (the friend who had a kid with my brother) and that they had 3 kids together. My brother found out that that couple had beaten my niece and now has full custody of my niece.
I currently live in a home with my kids and bf. I have a job. I have kept up with every court date. I have shown up for every courtdate. Even driving hours to and from the court house because I lived 2 years in a different state. I have done everything in my power to make sure my kids are safe and away from the situation. However I feel like my oldest will need to know who his bio father is eventually. He's only 8yrs old rn. He does resemble his bio father in some ways that are only shown when he's mad or trying to hide something and it scares me every time. I love my kid and I feel horrible everytime my mind sees my adoptive father in my son. My son knows that his biological father is responsible for a scar across his middle finger because his bio father turned on a industrial fan while my son's hand was on it, but that's all he knows about his biological father. How do I go about helping him not turn into the type of person his biological father is? How would I address it later when he has more questions?
submitted by Epic-Kitti to abusesurvivors [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 05:12 Animelizards apartment breeds to help get more active

Introduction
  1. Will this be your first dog? If not, what experience do you have owning/training dogs?
  1. Do you have a preference for rescuing a dog vs. going through a reputable breeder?
  1. Describe your ideal dog.
  1. What breeds or types of dogs are you interested in and why?
  1. What sorts of things would you like to train your dog to do?
  1. Do you want to compete with your dog in a sport (e.g. agility, obedience, rally) or use your dog for a form of work (e.g. hunting, herding, livestock guarding)? If so, how much experience do you have with this work/sport?
Care Commitments
7) How long do you want to devote to training, playing with, or otherwise interacting with your dog each day?
8) How long can you exercise your dog each day, on average? What sorts of exercise are you planning to give your dog regularly and does that include using a dog park?
9) How much regular brushing are you willing to do? Are you open to trimming hair, cleaning ears, or doing other grooming at home? If not, would you be willing to pay a professional to do it regularly?
Personal Preferences
10) What size dog are you looking for?
11) How much shedding, barking, and slobber can you handle?
12) How important is being able to let your dog off-leash in an unfenced area?
Dog Personality and Behavior
13) Do you want a snuggly dog or one that prefers some personal space?
14) Would you prefer a dog that wants to do its own thing or one that’s more eager-to-please?
15) How would you prefer your dog to respond to someone knocking on the door or entering your yard? How would you prefer your dog to greet strangers or visitors?
16) Are you willing to manage a dog that is aggressive to other dogs?
17) Are there any other behaviors you can’t deal with or want to avoid?
Lifestyle
18) How often and how long will the dog be left alone?
19) What are the dog-related preferences of other people in the house and what will be their involvement in caring for the dog?
20) Do you have other pets or are you planning on having other pets? What breed or type of animal are they?
21) Will the dog be interacting with children regularly?
22) Do you rent or plan to rent in the future? If applicable, what breed or weight restrictions are on your current lease?
23) What city or country do you live in and are you aware of any laws banning certain breeds?
24) What is the average temperature of a typical summer and winter day where you live?
Additional Information and Questions
25) Please provide any additional information you feel may be relevant.
26) Feel free to ask any questions below.
submitted by Animelizards to dogs [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 05:12 Shutupcole98 AITA for telling my mom how I feel?

So I'm gonna start this off with saying I suck at explaining how I feel in posts and well I have a hard time explaining anything anywhere so if what I say doesn't make sense in some parts I do apologize. Hi, my name's Cj I'm a soon to be 26 (may 22nd aye, only eight days away from posting this) male who just kind of had a blown up at my mom but no yelling conversation with my mom. My mom (soon to be 49) had me as a bit of an accident, her and my dad (who lives in Vegas) had "one last go" before my mom moved back to Wisconsin and then found out she was pregnant with me a few months later. Growing up she always told my dad didn't want anything to do with me, was an alcoholic, drug addict and other horrible things so she never let me talk to him or let him come to Wisconsin to see me or us go out to Vegas to meet him at all (I never met him or talked to him). After he passed away in 2011 I started talking to his side of the family like my aunts, uncles and grandma. A year or so after talking to them I asked them if my dad ever talked about me to them or how he wanted to see me, they told me that he loved me so much and was trying to do everything he could to see me and meet me. A couple years ago I asked my aunt about my dad being an alcoholic and all that, my aunt said my dad never touched the stuff, only drug he did was a bit of weed every now and then, no alcohol or hard drugs. When I found that out I was heartbroken and I kind of kept it inside of how I felt for a few months, when I confronted her about her lies she denied ever saying anything like that but my grandparents, uncle and other family members all tell me that she said all those bad things about him all the time. My dad from when I was born to when he died, tried so hard to meet me and spend time with me but my mom denied him every time. Denied me my father and made up lies about him to make me think he was a bad man but he was the complete opposite.
That's one of the things I blew up at her about, here's the others. When I was about 4 or 5 years old my mom married my ex step dad (they divorced when I was 10) and they had my two younger sisters (that information will come into play soon). For the years my mom was married to, let's call him C, C abused me mentally and physically but that's it. She never once defended after he did those things except for maybe a couple times in the beginning. Now if my sisters (one who is 6 years younger than me and the other is 8 years younger than me) had been treated even an ounce badly she would defend them right away. Fast forward to the present, I left my mom to live with my grandparents at the age of 10 (right after their divorce) when they got legal custody of me cause I was dealing with a lot of mental stuff kids that age should never deal with (depression, PTSD and more),I included that part of moving in with my grandparents cause it was at that time she never told me she loves me, appreciates me or anything since then. I always had contact with her, visited her dozens of times a month with my grandparents, stayed with her, lived with her for a year back in 2021-2022 after I got out of the mental hospital. I have done so much for her, after my dad died I started getting social security death benefits (I believe that's what it is called I'm not to sure) monthly but since I was still young my mom was getting them, I didn't get a PENNY from those which were supposed to go to me and my care cause she was using it all on herself for rent when I didn't even live with her, random bull crap and more. When I was able to open my own bank account when I was 16 with the help of my grandparents I started getting those checks myself. When that happened she went off the handle and blamed me for her possibly getting kicked out of her place, not being able to afford food and other things when she had a great paying job that she was able to more than support herself and my two sisters as a single mom. Ever since then my mom constantly guilt trips me into helping her out with money (she makes almost twice as much as I do) for bills and food, I used to do it every time and she never thanked me for it, said she loved me for doing it or anything. I've recently stopped doing it but she still brings up in random phone conversations or texts quite literally out of thin air (we can be talking about random things like the weather) like saying "yeah I don't think I can afford the electric bill this month cause my whole paycheck went to rent and I don't even think I can get groceries" but yet she can afford getting more random crafts she'll lose interest in in a matter of days, new bags, water bottles and more.
Okay sorry for the long winded explanation, this all boiled up to yesterday (day after mother's day) when she posted stuff about what my sisters got her for mother's day, nothing about what I got her even though I spent $100+ on her and not even a thanks or I love you for it. I called her and asked why she didn't include what I got her she simply said "I don't know" and for some reason that set me off to where I spent about 25 minutes telling her how she has made me feel like a son she never wanted and doesn't want by saying she kept me from my dad for no reason, she let the abuse happen, she drains me of my money, doesn't say I love you, makes everything about her like when my grandma died, how she hurts me with all the bad stuff she's done to me, talks bad about me behind my back (I know this cause my sisters tell me when she does when she talks to them and vice versa for me to them), doesn't care if I died barley able to get a coherent sentence together cause I'm choking on tears. All she had to say was "so you just think I'm a horrible mother? Should I just go die in a hole then? Would that make you feel better?". When she said that I just hung up the phone and cried till I had to go to work, I work with kids so I had to put on a strong face. We haven't talked since then and I don't know how long it will be till We do..... So AITA for finally letting her know how I feel about what she's done/does to me? Or am I truly a bad son like how she makes me feel?
submitted by Shutupcole98 to AmItheAsshole [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 05:11 4xlwolfshirt Got hit on by a woman today who I found attractive but I brushed it off and now I am realizing a lot of things.

Hi!
I’m 36 and honestly for the first time really admitting to myself that I may want to date women. I feel like this could be what’s been wrong this whole time and I feel sort of embarrassed and kind of amazed that I’ve been able to repress it for so long.
I was shopping at the local co-op and saw this really cool looking ‘hippie’ girl with pig tails and remember noticing her. But I did my usual thing where I immediately look away and distract myself. Then at the checkout she was really nice and chatty with me, asked me lots of questions, and she ended up saying, “are you going to the fair?! Because I’ll be there.” (I guess there’s a farmers market/fair coming up, but I will actually be out of town.) Anyway, it really felt like more than just friendly banter but I deflected it. Then I kept thinking about it. If I was able to get over my hangups and repression and probably internalized homophobia, I would absolutely have wanted to go to the fair with her!
Now I’m lying in bed thinking back to when I was in high school and wasn’t attracted to a single boy but I WAS attracted to my female friend (who is a lesbian) but I really couldn’t admit it to myself. She invited me on her family vacation and we shared a bed and I remember her turning to me at night and trying to sort of make a move but I was frozen. I couldn’t respond.
I’ve only ever been with men but it’s never been anything really long term. I have been single for 4 years now. I keep thinking I am looking for a man but now I’m realizing maybe that’s not what I actually want.
I feel so weird that I’m this age and feeling this way. It’s not like this is the first time I’ve questioned my sexuality, but it’s the first time I’m really allowing myself to admit that… maybe I am gay. Or bi. I don’t know.
I feel better typing this out.
Thank you for listening!
submitted by 4xlwolfshirt to latebloomerlesbians [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 05:08 Positive_Rain2834 Divorce is eight around the corner… but I still wish he would have fought for us.

I’m venting but also looking for advice.
My husband has decided that his needs are more important than fighting for our little family. (32m and 33f) I am suffering from severe postpartum depression I’m currently in therapy. We have both neglected each other. (We have been together for 6years and married 2 he was supposed to be my soul mate I loved him so deeply he was the one my soul loved )
My husband has had an affair with three women: 1) was a girl form the gym, she asked him to come over early in the morning. we live far from his work right now (at my parents house ) so he would get up around 345am to go to the gym. At first he said yes but decided not to go, but spilled all of our dirty laundry to her. So now she’s just waiting in the winds.
2) is an ex-girlfriend that he dated well over 10 years ago. That maybe bisexual, but she still sends him explicit text messages that are his fetish themed, especially on his birthday, our anniversary and when she gets into a fight with her wife.
3) now girl number three is the worst part. She works with my husband and they are having an emotional affair. They have allegedly only kissed once but the time that they did they kiss like how I used to kiss my husband.( with 3 little playful kisses) she also has a daughter that’s elementary school age. And they have text messages talking about being a family with my son and he has sent her pictures of our son and she sent pictures of her daughter to him. He has said he can’t wait to show her daughter what it’s like to have a real daddy, but here’s the kicker he doesn’t do the bare minimum when it comes to our son. Ohh and they sent each other nudes… and sexted Sometime I get these moments where my heart is racing and I just know they are together.
You maybe wondering how I found all this out? Well I went through his phone the one night while he was asleep and found all of it. Woke him up and kicked him out. We have been separated for about a month now.
I still have all these feelings: loving him, hating him, being hurt, mad, sad, disappointed, in this place of awe/disbelief (like how is this my life). Does this ever get easier, how do you move forward?
He is acting so entitled and just in his actions, why can’t he see what he’s done to our son to our family, how can he just walk away without fighting for us?
submitted by Positive_Rain2834 to Marriage [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 05:07 ot_t17 Was I groomed?

I met this 15 years older guy when I was 20, in a workplace environment. Basically we had an emotional affair and when I decided to move on and let go, he declared and cried and told me he wanted to date me.
We dated for 6 months and things didn’t work out so I end the relationship and left. He spent two years sending gifts and letters to my place so I finally decided to talk to him, we dated again for 6 months. He started to turn abusive, left me and I found out later he cheated on me.
The end of everything was when I was 26 years old.
I can see how power dynamics were very imbalanced and I honestly feel very used and I got into a deep depression because I was psychologically abused. He basically gave me all I wanted in a man, and once he finally slept with me, he changed.
But people kept saying I was an adult and knew what I was doing. I feel I’m being punished for believing somebody wasn’t going to harm me and loving them.
Was I groomed or not?
submitted by ot_t17 to abusiverelationships [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 05:06 ot_t17 Was I groomed?

I met this 15 years older guy when I was 20, in a workplace environment. Basically we had an emotional affair and when I decided to move on and let go, he declared and cried and told me he wanted to date me.
We dated for 6 months and things didn’t work out so I end the relationship and left. He spent two years sending gifts and letters to my place so I finally decided to talk to him, we dated again for 6 months. He started to turn abusive, left me and I found out later he cheated on me.
The end of everything was when I was 26 years old.
I can see how power dynamics were very imbalanced and I honestly feel very used and I got into a deep depression because I was psychologically abused. He basically gave me all I wanted in a man, and once he finally slept with me, he changed.
But people kept saying I was an adult and knew what I was doing. I feel I’m being punished for believing somebody wasn’t going to harm me and loving them.
Was I groomed or not?
submitted by ot_t17 to Adulting [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 05:05 trickytoddler Simple question are human pest to earth?

Why god allowed humans to create arrows, bows, weapons, axe, & machines etc What does God want with humans? Does it want that we should cut trees collect woods build our houses. Kill animals and eat them. Why god wants us to interfere so much with nature. If God has given us so much leniency wouldn't we just kill the earth? Can anyone control humans in same way that humans control ants or pests, lions, fish etc? I beleive all of the living beings are afraid of death same as we. Btw who came up with the term such as living and non living being in this vast universe. These kind of terminologies limit our thinking. Also humans are more confused than they were ever. Because of social media, It's a difficult time already for humans, wherein they are spending their brain capacity on unproductive stuffs because gurus are vanishing and everyone is a guru. Who disciplines the ants? That they move in such a coordinated way. Do ants have a different god? Since they are able to survive despite not having superior brain similar to us. Should we limit our usage of brain as a community? Why do we want to live so much. We already live atleast 100 times the age of an ant. Tortoise lives for more than 100 years and yet doesn't disturb earth, why are we becoming pests day by day. Why god allowed us to make weapons and stuff?
submitted by trickytoddler to Purpose [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 05:01 ot_t17 Was I groomed?

I met this 15 years older guy when I was 20, in a workplace environment. Basically we had an emotional affair and when I decided to move on and let go, he declared and cried and told me he wanted to date me.
We dated for 6 months and things didn’t work out so I end the relationship and left. He spent two years sending gifts and letters to my place so I finally decided to talk to him, we dated again for 6 months. He started to turn abusive, left me and I found out later he cheated on me.
The end of everything was when I was 26 years old.
I can see how power dynamics were very imbalanced and I honestly feel very used and I got into a deep depression because I was psychologically abused. He basically gave me all I wanted in a man, and once he finally slept with me, he changed.
But people kept saying I was an adult and knew what I was doing. I feel I’m being punished for believing somebody wasn’t going to harm me and loving them.
Was I groomed or not?
submitted by ot_t17 to dating_advice [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 05:01 bonesgreedy Hit a roadblock trying to come up with my OC's fake age

Hi, hello!!
Something was brought up to my attention and google wasn't helpful, so I'm hoping someone here understands kids better than I do.
Without rambling too much, when my OC was five years old, his sister took him and ran away from their family, with the objective to protect him. And from that point on, she raised him.
And in my head, it makes sense that she lied about their ages, both to make her seem older, and to make him seem younger. My idea was that she would tell people that he was two. But my friends said that that wouldn't be believable, that he would be too big for a toddler.
So I was wondering, how old can she say he is while still being believable?
submitted by bonesgreedy to OriginalCharacter [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 05:00 Bitter_Stranger2107 PS4 meetup community

I’m looking to do a party meetup this weekend for gamers that may be struggling to find people to play with on their older consoles or are just looking for a fun squad to play with often.
I am new to leading a gaming community and I’m not starting out too ambitious for the first meetup but will have a small discord running for all persistent group members to join for future meetups.
I will have a soft max of 32 persistent members to keep the community close over time I hope to slowly increase this number to 100 with the incorporation of mods. The community will most likely never be more than 100 players just because I like the idea of all members being active and close with each other even if we all aren’t playing the same game.
I am non discriminating in any way and plan to hold my community’s discriminating standards to the same I hold myself to while also believing that a joke is a joke as long as it is at no ones expense.
I am 18+ so my community will stay that way but have no max age limit I believe anyone and everyone can be a gamer and a good squad mate
I am ps4 based so if you don’t have a ps4, membership won’t be an option I will have meetups often for new members replacing inactive and open spots often so keep a look out for future post
Shoot me a message for a meetup discord invite for base members
Persistent is not a paid for membership and never will be I am looking for friends not a cash grab
submitted by Bitter_Stranger2107 to ps4clans [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 04:59 Elegant-Wolf-4263 New To Therapy Here - What Do I Do?

Alright, long story short…
I am a college-aged female. I did technically try “therapy” about 3 years ago, but I don’t consider it therapy. It was basically a lecture from a “therapist” trying to tell me that my severe chronic pain was not real and that I probably just have anxiety and OCD (which I don’t), and should take medication for those and it will all be better. Big waste of time, made me really angry and resentful towards therapists in general, especially since that occurred around the same time I was experiencing a lot of medical trauma from attempted treatments for that chronic pain.
Fast forward to now…
I’ve realized over the past few years that my experience is not what therapy is supposed to be, and after talking to a trusted older friend about it, that that person probably shouldn’t even be licensed, at least as a pain specialist. I have decided to try therapy again at a different place with a different person. I have some medical things that I need to deal with, but my extreme fear of going to the doctor is preventing me from seeking any sort of treatment for anything.
It’s easy to say it all on here anonymously, but saying it out loud to someone’s face is really hard :(
But seriously, it’s gotten to the point that I would rather die of cancer than go to the doctor to get any necessary screenings, or stuff like that.
I had my first therapy eval yesterday, and it went better than I expected it would based on my experience last time. I’m trying to keep an open mind about it all and not let my past experience get in the way of me making progress.
Anyways, I’m not seeking a PTSD diagnosis or anything like that, but I do get flashbacks and nightmares about the things I experienced at the doctor a few years ago (I was in a pain clinic for a long time), and there was a procedure I had when I was 3 that was not supposed to be a big deal, but it still haunts my memories (sexual in nature), as it was done while I was fully awake and un-anesthetized.
These have caused me a lot of distress, but I am also very embarrassed about it all, so I have kept all of this to myself (save for like 2 people who I am very close to). There are very specific moments/memories from these instances that pop into my head several times a day. I mentioned in my eval yesterday that I have had bad experiences with doctors that still bother me, but I didn’t go into specifics (therapist didn’t push for specifics either). Am I supposed to tell her about these memories/moments in depth, or just give her the gist of what happened, or do I not have to tell her the specifics of them at all? Will her knowing exactly what happened be beneficial?
I’m asking because I don’t know HOW to tell her. These are things I have never told anybody, and I don’t even know how to talk about it. Only a very few of my trusted friends even know the real reason why I don’t go to the doctor anymore, but even when telling them, I have kept the reasoning to a simple “I had bad experiences and it still scares me today”. If my therapist must know the details to better help me, would it be weird to write it down and let her read it? I think if I tried to say it I’d either burst into tears and not be able to talk or I’d be completely numb to it since I’ve held it in and thought about it for so long that she’d think I was lying.
Any suggestions would be great. Thanks!
submitted by Elegant-Wolf-4263 to therapy [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 04:58 Jealous_Ad_915 Todd Chavez Continuity

When Todd’s mom kicks him out it’s Christmas time but he supposedly was kicked out of his parent’s house recently when he moved in with Bojack. We know for a fact that Todd is 18 in the “Mr. Peanutbutter’s Boos” episode in the plot line when he moves in with Bojack. We also know for a fact that Todd’s mom kicked him out when he was 18. Todd’s birthday is 04/15/1991. This means that there is no logical way for him to have been kicked out at Christmas at 18 but also showing up for Bojack’s halloween party at 18. In the youngest Todd plot line, Emily makes it a point to say “thirteen year old Todd” and then PC says “come back when you’re three years younger or five years older”. So he came back when he was 18. Either his mom decorates for Christmas VERY early or there is at least one continuity issue with the show “Bojack Horseman”. Please comment your thoughts. I have seen this show literally 100s of times through (it’s my special interest), I am pretty knowledgeable about the show.
submitted by Jealous_Ad_915 to BoJackHorseman [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 04:57 miirshroom Examining Tolkein: Gelmir, Faroth and Beyond

Examining Tolkein: Gelmir, Faroth and Beyond
It has been said that the Lord of the Rings is the origin of the high fantasy genre. I would consider Elden Ring to be something of a deconstruction of high fantasy tropes. A very instructive step of a deconstruction (or of duplicating results) is to look at a thing and examine the elements it is made of. The more general the better - the goal is to find the things that inspired the thing:
  • The setting is inspired by research into many real world mythologies and folk tales. And Tolkein's religious beliefs as a Catholic.
  • Tolkein invented full language systems that were used to add extra significance to the names of people and places
  • The personal history and psychology of the author had an undeniable influence on the themes of the story (when Tolkein writes about the devastation of war it is from a place of sincerity - because he lived it)
So, these are the ingredients of a successful fantasy story that also apply to Elden Ring - draws parallels to previous fantasy stories including mythology, use of bespoke words and naming schemes that are internally consistent as parallel to the real world, and incorporates psychologically-driven themes (in the case of Elden Ring I believe that it is less of the psychology of a person and more about drawing on the psychology of the gaming company FromSoftware...but that is beyond the point of this post).
And regarding the influence of Tolkein there are a few more explicit parallels to be drawn. Which for legal reasons regarding the rights to adapt Tolkein's Legendarium will likely never ever be confirmed by FromSoft. But as I see it getting references under the radar of the copyright lawyers is a time honoured tradition of deconstructive fantasy stories and parodies, so I will attempt to explain these connections as I see them, regardless. Also note that I am writing from the perspective of someone who has been familiar with the Lord of the Rings but never before looked at the extended mythology.
A linguistic connection is formed in the space between two main points that I am aware of: Gelmir of Nargothrond as the possible naming inspiration for Mt. Gelmir, and geographical region "Taur-en-faroth" containing part of the name used for Fort Faroth.

Gelmir

"J.R.R. Tolkien has become a sort of mountain, appearing in all subsequent fantasy in the way that Mt. Fuji appears so often in Japanese prints. Sometimes it's big and up close. Sometimes it's a shape on the horizon. Sometimes it's not there at all, which means that the artist either has made a deliberate decision against the mountain, which is interesting in itself, or is in fact standing on Mt. Fuji." - Terry Pratchett
First addressing Gelmir - literally the volcanic mountain is a reference to Tolkein. As clear of a declaration as possible that Elden Ring intends to stand on Mt. Fiji.
Gelmir in the "canon" version of the Legendarium was an elf of Nargothrond who was captured by the forces of Morgoth at the "Battle of Sudden Flame" which was the fourth great conflict in the War of the Jewels (the war over the 3 silmarils for which "the Silmarillion" is named). He was subsequently blinded and tortured for 17 years until his death - after having his limbs cut off to taunt his brother Gwindor into attacking recklessly - at the start of the fifth great conflict known as "The Battle of Unnumbered Tears". Gwindor himself was captured and held prisoner for an additional 17 years after this battle, before escaping at the expense of having a hand cut off and eventually dying in another battle of the war. He was in love with a golden-haired elf maiden named Finduilas (name meaning "hair of spring leaf") who he also called "Faelivrin" meaning "Gleam of the Sun on the Pools of Ivrin" ("Pools of Ivrin" being a location in the land called Beleriand). She was killed before the end of the war by being nailed to a tree with a spear.
For context, the sixth great conflict was called "The War of Wrath" and was the final one. Morgoth brought dragons to the battle to blast the battlefield with fire and lightning - which had never been done in any previous battle - and the outcomes were that Morgoth was beheaded and kicked through a portal into the void and the northwest corner of the map including almost all of Beleriand (an area equal to the size of the entire Middle Earth map at the time of the Lord of the Rings story!) sunk into the ocean.
There is a lot to work with here already - first being Gelmir's associations with flame and imprisonment and torture that are shared by both Tolkein's and Elden Ring's purposes. Blindness is noteworthy, considering how often this is a theme with Elden Ring characters and even partial blindness is enough to cause madness as indicated by the Prisoner Helmet. Taking a few lateral steps arrives at a golden haired maiden who shares the method of execution used for Marika. And her name meaning "gleam of the sun on the surface of the water" exactly describes the imagery seen in the Elden Ring item "Memory of Grace".
But there's still more to spin from this line! Because Finduilas had another lover named "Turin Turambar" who was a friend of Gwindor and whose family had been cursed by Morgoth. Turin owned a magic helm upon which was perched an image of the Golden Dragon Glaurung - similar to the style of helmet worn by Elden Ring's Banished Knights) - and which allowed him to survive dragon fire. Turin found on the grave of Finduilas a naked woman who he called "Na­niel" or "Maiden of Tears" - because she had lost her memory and was crying - and wed her with neither knowing that they were estranged brother and sister (this is based on the Finnish story of Kullervo, with which Tolkein was especially fascinated). This was revealed to them later to be a machination of Glaurung when Turin was in the midst of slaying the dragon, and subsequently both Turin and Naniel killed themselves. Before meeting his end, Turin also described himself in (probably) poetic terms as having blindness being the curse placed upon him by Morgoth, which is assumed by readers to be more a matter of tunnel vision or short sightedness rather than literal blinding. He is also apparently prophesied to return to life someday in the supplementary materials.
What this means exactly for Elden Ring is up to interpretation. A story could be spun by combining Gelmir, Gwindor, and maybe even Turin into a single character who are motivated by unrequited and/or incestuous love for Finduilas/Naniel also made into a single character - to fill in the empty spaces around the characters of Marika, Radagon, and Godfrey. Or there could be some other purpose for naming the mountain "Gelmir". There is room for more nuance here because there are the alternate Gelmir's to consider.
In one version, Gelmir was king of the gnomes, by which Tolkein was inspired by the Greek "gnome“" meaning "thought" or "intelligence". But this was dropped due to the cultural confusion with gnomes being wrinkly little creatures.
In another version Gelmir was the same character as Finwe, an elf who was born during the "Years of the Trees" that preceded the era called the "Years of the Sun". At this time, the light of the world was confined to the Lands of the Valinor (a pantheon of Creator types) in the west provided by the female golden tree named Laurelin in the south and the male silver tree Telperion in the north. Finwe's wife was a weaver named Mi­riel Therinde and his son Feanor was responsible for forging the Silmarils and jealously guarding them (And also he invented the 7 palanti­ri scrying stones + 1 master stone, and the Tengwar writing system). The grandson of Feanor and last of his line was Celebrimbor, meaning "silver fist". Celebrimbor forged the three rings for the elves (named for air, fire, and water) that were subject to the One Ring but never corrupted by it. So, it's possible that "Gelmir" is selected for being a deceptively niche character who was actually in another lifetime very closely connected to these core events of the history. The appearance of a character named "Miriel" is also interesting in the context of Elden Ring's Miriel, Pastor of Vows.
As a side note, something else of interest from this Tolkein deep dive was regarding the relationship between the silmarils and the world trees of the Valinor. The 3 Silmarils contained the remaining light of the two trees that were destroyed and had the sun and moon forged of their fruits by blacksmith Aule. When the trees were first made they were sung into existence by Yavanna and watered by the tears of Nienna (who was a teacher of the wizard Gandalf and in earlier versions of the Legendarium called "Queen of Shadow"). Nienna again wept healing tears upon the trees to grow the fruits when they were dying. Morgoth stole the Silmarils and set them into his Iron Crown, and upon his defeat the stones were pried out and the crown beaten into a collar for his neck (in the brief period of time before he was kicked into the void anyways). One Silmaril was thrown into the sky where it became the Evening Star. Another was cast into the sea. And the third was cast into a firey pit in the earth along with its possessor.
And as an addition, it is not farfetched that Morgott = Morgoth is an intended spiritual parallel. Considering that Morgoth was indirectly responsible for the blinding and killing of Gelmir (brother of Gwindor) in Tolkein's mythic history. And in Elden Ring this seems expressed in the Shattering War though Morgott pursuing Mt. Gelmir most fiercely. In a more broad sense, Morgoth was the identity taken by Melkor after he was released from the chains made to bind him by Aule, which is somewhat similar to Morgott/Margit using alternate names depending on the circumstance (and Margit's Shackle paralleling Melkor's binding chains).

Faroth

"Faroth" is a Sindarin word meaning "hunters". The "Hills of the Hunters" (Taur-en-faroth) was a location in West Beleriand, the aforementioned western part of the continent that sunk into the ocean at the end of the War of the Jewels. In these hills was hidden the secret elven city of Nargothrond on the Narog River. The same from which Gelmir of Nargothrond is associated. The city began as a Dwarven Hall for the petty dwarfs (exiled and unsociable dwarfs smaller than typical dwarfs), was conquered and ruled by the House of Finarfin (a son of Finwe), and was sacked and turned to the lair of the dragon Glaurung some time after The Battle of Unnumbered Tears. And then fell into the ocean.
At this point there are too many names, which is why I sketched a family tree of all of all these elves that is attached to this post.
Some general trends:
  1. Of the 3 family lines the middle one has significance for being the one to produce the Numenor Kings of Men
  2. The family lines at the two sides have plot significance as discussed in the Gelmir section, but then their lineages die off.
  3. Typically continuity is maintained through the male lines, with sole exception of Idril in the 3rd generation removed from Finwe. The origins of the women spouses are typically left vague (with 3 exceptions near the root of the lineage: Indis has a famous uncle, Nerdanel has a significant blacksmith father, and Earwen's extended family has some substance to it)
If a writer wanted to do a legally distinct take on this mythology while borrowing from it for whatever reason, it would be easy to condense the feats and characterization of these 3 lineages into one truncated one. Maybe fuse Finduilas with Idril - two blonde ladies with minimal character - and also fuse together their lovers and you have a Marika + Godfrey. The narratively satisfying thing about Finduilas being associated to Gwindor (who may as well be made the same character as Gelmir) is that it creates a closed loop for the whole lineage when GwindoGelmir is substituted for Finwe, which is a very attractive proposition for a story like Elden Ring where time is a wheel and return to the origin point is a principle of the Golden Order.
Also this region calls attention to the significance of the river Ringil. That word comes up as: 1) a mountain river through Taur-en-Faroth that is tributary to the Narog river, 2) a sword held by Fingolfin (another son of Finwe), and 3) as the primordial tower - sometimes made of ice - upon which sat the south lamp Ormal (an orb containing the gold light of the world in the First Age that would later pass to the gold tree Laurelin in the Second Age). In an earlier version of the writings. The blacksmith Aule created the lamps at the request of Yavanna, who was herself responsible for the growth of fruits and trees. The end of the "Days before Days" (which preceeded the "Years of the Trees") occurred with the breaking of the lamps by Melkor, after a period of time where he had poisoned the land and caused the things made by Yavanna to rot.
I will note that the early timeline was a bit difficult to follow. I gather that there are spans of time lit only by the stars between the destructions of these various sun/moon light sources, a period of time with Yavanna singing all living life to sleep due to the lack of light. The First Age is also called "The Awakening" but it appears that much of the war between Morgoth and the elves began prior to the beginning of the First Age. There is an aside in which Aule was also responsible for creating the "Seven Fathers of the Dwarves", but he made them too early and they had to go to sleep so that the elves of Iluvatar could be the first sentient mortal life. I found interesting this additional context for the lamps:
"In the middle of Arda, where the light of the lamps mingled, amid the Great Lake lay the Isle of Almaren, where the Valar dwelt." - The One Wiki to Rule them All
"In J.R.R. Tolkien's older writings (not used in the published version of The Silmarillion), the Valar sought peace with Melkor, asking his assistance with fixing the lamps upon Arda. Melkor, still envious and hateful of the rest of the Valar, agreed to give them a strong, sturdy substance. He gave Aule ice. Melkor permitted the Valar to do as they wished until the fateful day when the Lamps' light and heat finally melted the ice. The pillars crashed upon Arda, flooding it with water and darkness." - The One Wiki to Rule them All
I suppose that if I have a point here it is that Radagon's Sore Seal talisman is found at Fort Faroth, which through the winding etymology of words is tied to Mt. Gelmir. Perhaps the blind Radagon was a hunter on a fruitless quest seeking the lost light of the Golden Sun that stood on the ice pillar of Ringil from the days before days - guided by the distant memory of the reflection of it's light on the water. Perhaps there is other meaning to be found. I acknowledge that after a certain point any interpretation found through these linguistics should be cross-referenced with everything that can be learned from all other sources of information in the game.

The Rings of Power

The big brazen choice - in my opinion - was to name the big metaphysical artefact "the Elden Ring"...and then draw actual direct parallel to the Rings of Power. Not the 3 rings granted to the Elf Kings under the sky - I've yet to identify how or if those are expressed in game. Not the 9 rings granted to Kings of Men either - those are seemingly represented in the 9 Night's Cavalry (and possibly the 9 weapon talismans that each feature a ring at the top of the head) . What I find most relevant here are the 7 Great Runes matching "seven for the Dwarf-lords in their halls of stone".
The first critical part of that phrase is the reference to "stone", for I find that the shattering of Marika's Hammer equates to the shattering of the wisdom of stone. But the second point of note is that the dwarf lords of Tolkein received their own curse from holding their rings of power - obsession with gold. A similar obsession is seen in Elden Ring where all of the demigods are corrupted by their great runes and covet the grace of gold.
The arrangement of the Elden Ring also has some synergy with the arrangement of its runes - 6 of the 7 dwarf lords pair nicely through the even numbers. The Seventh Dwarf Lord was the chief among them "Durin the Deathless", who was reincarnated 7 times by being reborn as one of his own descendants. His clan also was generally known to absorb members from all other clans due to his central importance. The first Durin (one of the 7 original fathers of dwarves) built the underground city of Khazad-dum that would later be called Moria after a creature of shadow and flame that may-or-may-not have wings (a Balrog of Morgoth) was uncovered in its depths by Durin VI. Durin III was the one to receive the Ring of Power from Celebrimbor, and Durin IV was contemporary to the first rise and defeat of Sauron. Durin VII is appears to be from the timeframe of the Lord of the Rings and second defeat of Sauron, though he did not participate and seems to be known instead for reclaiming Khazad-dum from the orcs.

Why Examine Tolkein?

So what's the point of the elaborate Tolkein parallel? There may be 7 ring-shaped great runes, but there is also clearly one ring that rules them all - the Elden Ring. Examining Tolkein is one of several avenues of analysis reaching the conclusion that the ring is a dangerous object that corrupts everyone who touches it and must be destroyed. Of the six endings the only one that understands this is Ranni's Age of Stars. And in the Lord of Frenzy Flame ending the Tarnished succumbs to the power of the ring with head becoming a ring of flame matching the firey beacon on top of the Frenzy Flaming Tower - itself visually recalling a depiction of the Eye of Sauron atop the tower of Barad-dur as seen in the 2000's Lord of the Rings trilogy adaptation.
And even more, there's one ring bearer in particular who provides another piece to the puzzle of Radagon and Marika's dual identities. The dissociative identity of Gollum and Smeagol can completely describe the relationship between Marika and Radagon. Two thoughts in one body. With this lens I think that Radagon/Marika were likely not separate entities at the time of their Shattering and may have never had a separate existence. They can appear to hold conversations with each other through reflective surfaces, such as a very shatter-able mirror.
It is quite possible that another Great Rune (or more) will make an appearance in the DLC. If this does happen, I'll re-evaluate Ring of Power theory based on the nature of the added rune.
One last note which, again, is oblique enough for plausible deniability. The end of Patches questline would have the Tarnished deliver the Dancer's Castanets to Tanith, inside the volcano. If you know anything about castanets, they are typically made of hard materials such as wood or ivory (or plastic) and carved into a pear shape. Not so for the Dancer's Castanets. From a visual examination these are made of metal cast in a circular shape and with a ring shaped engraving filled with filigree. A metal ring-shaped object delivered to a volcano, echoing the One Ring delivered to Mt. Doom in the Lord of the Rings.
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2024.05.15 04:56 No-Health-1722 Masturbation

As a late teen and in my early and mid twenties (maybe later 20’s - can’t recall), I would occasionally masturbate to teenagers. It definitely wasn’t the preference (maybe 5%) of the time but being older now it makes me feel sick.
How unusual is this? I definitely never had a preference for that age group but this confuses me regardless now.
submitted by No-Health-1722 to TrueOffMyChest [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 04:56 zaddar1 photos/ staring out from a smooth granite block

the suicidal
step out
into death
who am i to judge ?
for what eternity holds
no-one knows
the low reading aged
if you write something they can’t understand
then according to them
its your fault
so they reject
this is the path of mediocrity
and cretinism
all religions schism, narratives of homogeneity require force to maintain (which can be extremely brutal historically)
Knock Out Asinine Nits
photos
staring out from a smooth granite block
if not quizzical
then should be
stuck in eternity
like that
somewhere
there must be a couple that mesh
and get along with each other
somewhere
i’m gone
the world rolls on
i disappear
and appear
the pages of a book that flick through
some words rest
and others don’t
skimming stones
eventually
stop
and sink
rhoticity explained to me, i now understand it, but otherwise i wouldn’t have had a clue except for the joking use of irish, scottish, canadian or usa accents
i think the zen term "seamless monument" is a metaphor for reality, you can’t penetrate it, there’s no artefact of manufacture since it has no seam, it can only be traversed, which btw is the basic philosophical problem of existence, there is no "inner" reality that subsumes "the detail of being"
“ I m currently 16 years old and a "child prodigy". I started university at 14. I have thus far only received one grade which was not an A+. It was an A-. I have memorized 100 digits of pi, the periodic table, and most of the Dungeons & Dragons rulebooks. I am learning Latin, Ancient Greek, Biblical Hebrew, Sahidic Coptic, Spanish, and Italian. I just like old languages. I don’t have to study long — I have a nearly photographic memory. When I do study, I just write things out over and over. I am a very visual thinker, so I remember pictures. Ask me anything ! ”
ed. she also has ehlers-danlos syndrome and is ADHD
in my view, the languages are a big mistake, they interfere with each other
“ Why do you think that ? ”
the languages you list are particularly disjunctive its a heavy learning burden with heaps of "opportunity costs" and the skill is becoming increasingly redundant with AI translators
also my experience of polyglots is they get damaged in some way
the brain is not infinitely capable, beware of burning it in waste of time activities, which to be honest a lot of so called education is
dr. alan cole argues that zen masters are in fact "made-over" daoist sages
i would go further and say that the koan system involves the same sort of "puzzling process" as the tao te ching
when you hear this sort of crap from the policy making elites, no wonder china is a problem !
the real impact of the one child policy may be the scarcity of anyone at the higher levels of government or policy being able to think straight
of course, this is to the advantage of the west and is the same problem japan had in WW2, idiots determining their strategic direction
boundaries crossing
abatement of being
from this perspective
everything looks crazy
really ?
do you ever listen to anything outside your own echo chamber ?
sad souls
in the twilight of their lives
mumbling gibberish
the words of others
are not your own
if you actually understood
why wouldn’t you use your own words ?
time separates
that childhood intensity
fades
as the branches grow apart
what was not seen at the time
is now seen
you are not well read and have an "anti-creative" mindset !
i’m getting on in years and just can’t be bothered to deal with your hubris
good-bye
ed. the net is full of these entitled gen Z’ers with a deeply entrenched intellectual inertia created by a malfunctioning education system
valves, muscle, connective tissue, timing
easy to see how it can go wrong as we get older
this dynamic core of existence in the center of our chests where every beat needs to be followed by another
i think religion can be regarded as a hallucination, the hallucination being that a literary work is real, perhaps most easily seen in the beliefs of ancient egypt, what are the pyramids and all those smaller tombs about ?
the reification of stories
these people
who
rather than bringing something to the table
only
take
and
are
impertinent
with
it
the puzzle of the poetry of others
seems to need the conversion
into something
i understand
"the girl on a bulldozer" (2022), a good tightly written kdrama
caodong poetry 23; verses on master fushan’s sixteen themes #4; touzi; translated by suru
  1. not falling into life or death
on the day when the golden rooster heralds the coming spring
the jade hare conceives, entering the purple palace
reeds bloom on both shores, shadowing egrets
an old fisherman lifts his oar, dispersing mist, returning home
.
不落死活。 金雞日裏報春時。 玉兔懷胎入紫微。 兩岸蘆華映白鷺。 漁翁舉棹撥煙歸。
.
my reply
one day
the distance travelled
catches up with you
and you have arrived
.
one day
the distance travelled
catches up with you
you
have
arrived
ed. the terms in suru’s translation are very chinese and have a historical perspective, so i have "reworked" it into something modern that people will understand
“ ChatGPT-4 scored higher than 100% of psychologists on a test of social intelligence ”
hilarious
a tui calls
stunning the silence
my day is filled
with melody
ed. the tui is a new zealand native songbird
if you have ever attempted to count the number words in a book or whatever, which i have, count the number in a couple of paragraphs, then multiply by the inverse of whatever proportion of a page it is then multiply by the number of pages and i figure you get within 10% which is close enough
i’ve written millions of words, its like an exclusive club and its interesting to know who else is in it
giacomo casanova’s autobiography
the book comprises 12 volumes and approximately 3,500 pages (1.2 million words) covering casanova’s life from his birth to 1774
i have read most of it, people misunderstand him as a legendary lothario, but he is much more interesting than that
submitted by zaddar1 to zen_mystical [link] [comments]


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