Patio table umbrella tablecloth round 48
Hunting Sasquatch for Communists, Featuring Ms. Anna Conda
2024.05.13 22:28 Lord_Long_Rod Hunting Sasquatch for Communists, Featuring Ms. Anna Conda
During the course of my career as an alpha Sasquatch hunting, Dogman destroying, pussy crushing, luxury watch loving dude, I have run into this particular woman a few times. She is one part uber sensuality, and the other part deadly. Yes, I am speaking about the lovely, Anna Conda. I bring her up because I had another run-in with her last year.
Anna and I first joined forces, so to speak, when she acted as a go-between in my business deal with the Chinese to sell them bigfoot parts. See, I would hunt and kill the critters, cut them up, deliver the parts to Anna, who in turn gave me a suitcase containing unmarked American hundred-dollar bills, then she would transport the bigfoot parts to the Chinese. I was never really sure of what the sneaky-ass Chinese were doing with the body parts. All I knew for sure is that they are extracting certain materials from them, then synthesizing them with some other shit, creating some sort of drug. Whether it then becomes a bio-weapon or a dick stimulant, I do not know. Neither do I care. As long as they kept the hundies coming, I was good.
Now, while Anna is of Russian descent, she is a freelancer. She will work for any sick, skeevy motherfucker out there. She does not care. She has no conscience, at least not in the traditional sense as we understand it in western civilization. Today she is working for the Chinese, and tomorrow she may be working for Hamas. She is a slippery motherfucker.
So here is how it went down. At 11:32 p.m. on a Friday in September of last year I get a call on my cell phone. When the call came in I was balls deep into this hot little lass I picked up at the bus station a little earlier in the evening from an old swarthy chap named “Colorado Joe”. He wanted to sell me the girl. I was assured she was over 20 years old. I told him I needed to take her out for a test ride, which he agreed to.
So, there I was, balls deep in “Bing Bang Yun”, and my phone rings. Of course, I silence all incoming calls not in my contacts list. Thus, I knew that I must know the caller. In mid stroke I reached over to the nightstand to retrieve my cell and looked at it. It was a call from “Sergio”. I thought, “Oh shit…. I am going to have to cut the Oriental bang circus short.” When Sergio calls, I have to respond…immediately. He has the best blow on the east coast!!
“Hey, Serge! What’s up?”, I asked. All he said was, “Hooters. 2:00 a.m.”, then hung up. This was obviously the rendezvous for the transaction. Now, understand that Serge was not talking about the chicken wing restaurant. Hooters was code, in case the feds were listening in on the line. “Hooters” meant the titty bar out on Highway 69 called “The Plump Rump”. We had a communications code we used.
It was a long haul to the titty bar, so I needed to get moving. I had no time to return the girl to Colorado Joe, so I took her with me. I had her blow me on the way to the meeting with Sergio, telling her that her performance would make the difference on whether I save her from Joe or not. Of course, after she was done I tossed her out of my speeding truck and down, over the bridge, and into the Wendigo River below. I did not need any complications in my life right now.
I arrived at The Plump Rump at 2:00 a.m. on the dot. I saw the manager, Lou Skunt, sitting at the bar when I walked inside. I nodded. He walked over and said to me, “Use my office for the meeting The parties are already in there waiting for you.” I nodded and then headed to Lou’s office. Then it hit me: Lou said the “PARTIES” are already here. That is, parties, meaning more than one person. It was not just Sergio. It was 2 or more people! Lou was probably in for a cut of whatever was about to go down.
Something was bad fucked up!! I know for a fact that Sergio never brings anyone with him on a deal, at least not with me. He is too distrustful of people to do that, and too fucking mean to need protection. Something was wrong. I was just as likely to get whacked when I enter Lou’s office as anything else. I needed a moment to think things through.
I took a spot in front of one of the performance poles to watch a young, swarthy Mexican lass perform. My mind quickly strayed from the problem at hand to this brown chick’s ass and tits. She was not a great looking chick, but her body was smoking!! I quickly became aroused. I thought to myself, “Goddamn Asian bitches!! They are just like Chinese food – after 2 hours you are ready for some more!!”
When the little Mexican chick went on break I motioned her over to my table. “Hola Senior!!”, she said. I pulled out a clear plastic baggie of blow and dropped it on the table. Her eyes grew wide and slobber starting falling from her mouth. Blow is like catnip for strippers. Thus, she fell under my spell immediately.
The next thing I know, this brown girl was on my lap, dry humping me like a feral bitch dog in heat. I had to bang her. I NEEDED to see my wang penetrating her. Just then, someone taps my shoulder hard. I look up to see Lou standing over me. He bent down and said, “Did you forget about my office, asshole?!?!?!” I replied, “Damn, Lou!! You read my mind!!!” I arose, with the little Mexican bolted onto my mid-section, and hastily retreated to Lou’s office. I figured Lou would prefer me to stain this chick in private rather than out in the open.
The door to the office opened easily. The lights were on inside. In a lustful haze, I set the little Mexican chick on her back across Lou’s desk and started pumping the shit out of her, completely unaware of the others in the room with us. In a moment I heard someone call my name. I twist my neck around to see Sergio sitting on Lou’s jizz crusted couch. I think to myself, “Oh shit! I forgot about that shit!”
I figured I would just move forward with the deal as it was proposed to me. “Hey Serge! What ya got for me, dude?”, I asked. He replied, “I have a very special deal for you. I need, uh … yeah, ……Hey, Rod, you want to stop for a moment so we can talk?” I picked up the little tamale and laid her down onto Sergio’s lap as I continued to plow her. She stayed on my cock the whole time. I told Sergio, “No, man. I’m good! Lay it on me!” Slowly, Sergio lowered his face into his palm.
Then it happened. The voice cam from behind me, in the dark corner of Lou’s office. It was velvety yet hard as steel. “Rod. Went need to talk”, it said. Even though I did not stop pumping the little brown chick, a chill went down my spine when I heard those words. It was the thick timbre of the voice, I think, that alerted me.
I turned to look across the room. There, sitting in a red leather captains chair against the wall was the source of the sultry voice: Anna Conda.
I picked up the little taco yet again and turned her around so I could face Anna as I continued pumping her. At this point the Mexican girl was merely a masturbation toy I was using. I increased my pump so I could dump my load and get this over with. Then BAMM!!!, it was over. I removed the lass from my huge rod, after which her body crumpled to the floor. I did not know if she was dead or injured, or what had happened to her. But I did not care either, so I did not dwell on it.
I tried to compose myself the best I could, then walked over to stand before Anna so I could get to the bottom of all this business. “Well, well, well. Anna Conda. We meet again. Tell me, what brings you here, to my little neck of the woods?”
Anna replied, “Rod, put your dick away.” I looked down and, indeed, I had forgotten to stow my cock. Out of pure curtesy, I packed it away. Then I returned my attention to Anna. “Alright, Anna, what’s going on here?”
Anna launched into a startling tale about what brought her to me. As she spoke I became lost in her wanton beauty. She got up from her chair and walked about the room as she relayed her story, presumably to make it more dramatic and demonstrative. I got a full-on view of her body, and it was fantastic!!
She stands 5’10’’ and weighs 105 lbs. She is lithe. She was showing it off too, wearing a black, silk dress that landed just about her ankles. The top was low-cut, betraying just a bit of cleavage from her C-cup wineglass titties. She was not wearing a bra. Anna never wears a bra. Her nips were perfectly outlined through the silk. In fact, I think her nips were hard. It was probably something she did on purpose in an attempt to influence me. It was working.
Anna’s ass was perfect. It was not at all fat, but round enough not to be skinny. It was a fit figure skater’s ass. As she walked, I could see a tiny bit of jiggle emanating from her ass flesh, and then reverberated in the silky black dress she wore. My cock began growing hard again.
Her face was beautiful. Think Scarlett Johanson and Phoebe Cates rolled into one. But any sweetness this may evoke is quickly dispelled by Anna’s throaty voice with its thick Russian accent. I have known Anna for 20 years. Yet, she still does not look a day over 25. Jesus Christ!!! If ever there was a chick to die for ….. If I was one to delve into the belief of the paranormal, then I may conclude that Anna made a deal with the devil. But, I am not such a person.
And literally, Anna Conda is a chick to die for. She is deadly as fuck. She will kill you in a split second without a thought just because she does not like the shirt you are wearing. She can do it too. She is always armed and she knows how to use her weapons. Moreover, she is a total psychopath. This makes her doubly dangerous.
Anna and I have always gotten along for the most part. Like Anna, the dollar is my primary motivating factor. Such a mindset allows for understanding and predictability among people, which are elements that are sorely missing in many business dealings today that go on in the color of darkness.
Suddenly, Anna snapped me out of my thoughts. “Here’s your gun, Rod. Now let’s get started”, said Anna. She and Sergio were halfway through the door exiting Lou’s office when I said, “Hey, wait a damned minute!!! What are you talking about?!?”
They both stopped, and Anna walked back in and looked me in the eyes, saying “The plan, Rod. Let’s get on with the plan.” A little embarrassed, I sheepishly asked, “What plan?” Anna folded her arms and looked cross at me. After a moment to allow me to simmer in my shame, she asked, “You were not paying attention, were you, Rod?” I shook my head and looked down.
I heard a hammer cock. I jerked my head back up to find myself staring down the barrel of a pistol pointed at my head that Anna was holding. I protested, “Look, it is not my fucking fault!! Put that fucking gun down!!!” I continued, “You were distracting me with …. Well.. you know, how you are dressed, and that hot, sultry voice…. You know?”
“So, instead of paying attention to the plan, you chose to eye-rape me. Is that what I am to understand your position is, Rod?”, she asked. Knowing that my life was on the line, I said, “Anna, look, you know I am horny to a fault. Then you come in here, swinging them tits around, wearing that silk dress showing off the crack of your ass…. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU EXPECT TO HAPPENED?”
Anna lowered her gun. She knew that my explanation of being a total cocksman was truth. “Let’s go”, Anna curtly said. I obeyed.
Anna explained the plan to me again on the drive from The Plump Rump. She made me wear a blindfold so that I would not get horny during her explanation. Here is how it went:
Anna Conda was now working for the Russians. It seems that Putin caught wind of the Sasquatch project that the Chinese were working on. He also knew that the American government have been fucking with sasquatch for decades. Thus, he was very concerned about the existence of a bigfoot gap. He ordered the acquisition of a Sasquatch specimen immediately.
Moreover, said specimen must be prime. It needed to be the biggest, baddest sasquatch of them all – a true alpha – so as to speed things along. Putin did not want some weird shit-creature, is-it-a-sasquatch-or-is-it-a-dogman, kind of monstrosity. He wanted purebred, badass sasquatchery, and preferably from the American Pacific northwest.
Anna got in on it because she sold the intel to Putin about China’s Sasquatch operation. She then told Putin she could produce sasquatch corpses for him. She told him she had a contact (i.e., me). Thus, with Putin’s blessing and promises of riches to come, Anna set out to America to find me.
Now, here is where things got a bit squirrely. See, I agreed to procure some more dead sasquatch. I have no problem with killing sasquatch because, in my opinion, they are an abomination on this Earth. I kind of feel like I am doing God’s work by wiping out as many of them as I can. And given all the not-so-Godly stuff I have done, I feel like killing Sasquatch kind of offsets that to some degree.
But Anna, she was stuck on Putin’s instruction that she must supply him with apex Sasquatch. So she did not want to take my advice of heading to the Pacific Northwest or Alaska. Instead, Anna claimed to have pinpointed the whereabouts of a particularly gruesome sasquatch beast that she KNEW would win her a fortune from Putin if she brought it to him.
“So, where is this beast?”, I asked. Anna replied “Martha’s Vineyard”. I paused. Then I asked her to repeat herself. It turns out that I was not mistaken about what Anna had said. I continued, “Uh, Anna, there are no sasquatch on Martha’s Vineyard, just a lot of wealth New Englander schmucks.”
Anna looked at me and told me I was wrong. Then she decided to attempt to taunt me. “Oh, Rod, mighty slayer of Bigfoot! Yet, you fail to take notice of where the biggest, most foul and rotten beast of them all makes its home. Jesus, Rod!! What kind of bigfoot hunter are you, anyway?” Anna then spit at my feet and wondered aloud whether she even needs me for this job.
I decided that I needed to straighten out the hierarchy here in order for this here deal to move forward. I said, “Well, Anna, feel free to truck on over to Old Whitey Beach and battle that beast. But, if there is a big old mangy sasquatch lurking around over there, then it is probably a fucking Nazi-Squatch. You know, those fuckers out there hate the Jews.”
The work “Nazi” visibly shook Anna. Her great grandfather died defending Leningrad. Her entire family there died of either starvation or cannibalism during Hitler’s siege during Operation Barbarossa. Anna despised Nazis. But she feared them too. After landing that punch, I decided to push my luck.
“Now, I am still willing to help you catch this here Nazi-Squatch, but you have to do something for me”, I said. Now Anna’s eyes were on me, and they were narrowing. I continued, “I want you to get bare assed naked and pleasure yourself while I stand over you and jack it.” Anna stared at me silently for a long moment. Then she replied.
“After the job is done, and you can get none of your … fluids… on me”, she said. I shook my head and countered, “Now, and I will ‘try’ to not get my spunk on you.”
However, Anna then turned the tables on me. In fact, she picked up the table and bashed my head in with it. She looked me in my eyes, then matter-of-factly said, “You get the beast, and your prize shall be a night with me, anything goes, darling.” Well, since this caused all of the blood to immediately drain from my brain, I had a lapse in judgment. “DEAL!!”, I said. Then we shook on it.
“OK, tell me more about this supposed monster sasquatch on Martha’s Vineyard”, I said. I still was not ready to believe there was a monster out there. “I show you photo”, said Anna. She took out her phone, scrolled to find the photo, then handed the phone to me. “There. Sasquatch”, she said.
I stared at the photo and remained silent. After a long moment, I turned the phone so that Anna could see the photo and asked, “Uh, Anna, is THIS what you intended to show me?” She replied. “Yes! There…Sasquatch! The biggest, grossest monster around.”
Now, I could not argue with Anna that the image on her phone is a big, gross monster. Hell, it could actually be a sasquatch, and THE UBER sasquatch. It is most certainly the grossest thing on Martha’s Vinyard. But I somehow do not think this is what Putin is expecting.
I turned to Anna and said, “Anna, this is a photo of Michelle Obama. I know it looks vile, and has a huge, hulking body with large appendages where a woman should not have them. But, sweatheart, that ain’t no sasquatch. That’s a big, hairy Chicago street negro.”
Anna did not believe me at first. She was hard in her conviction that Obama was a sasquatch. “I have seen the Sasquatch beast you deliver to me for China. This … Michelle Obama …. It is big, and hairy, and ugly like the sasquatch beast, but worse.”
When the truth finally set it, I could see that it had kind of broken down poor Anna, if only just a bit. I put my arm around Anna and told her, “Look, Michelle O fooled you. Hell, she and her Hamas Hubby fooled millions of Americans, twice! At least you saw Michelle for what she is, to wit: a big, gross sasquatch, and NOT some kind a retarded leftist messiah.”
After that, things took a rather dark turn. “What if we still take her to Putin? We can make deal; sell her to Putin!!” At this point I held up my hands and said, “I’m out”, then turned and walked away. Anna followed, trying to get me to stay. At this point, I could tell that Anna was coming undone a little.
See, she had to produce for Putin. There is no telling what kind of secret deal she actually had with him. She had to deliver a big old mangy Obama …. Er, uh, I mean … Sasquatch, to Putin.
“Ok, Rod, we do your plan. We go out west to kill bigfoot. Huge, monster bigfoot. she said. I turned and looked Anna in her eyes and said the following: First, we bang for 48 hours straight, right now, so I can get my fill of you. Second, you pay me $10,000.00 cash upfront. Third, upon delivery of the dead bigfoot, you pay me $1 million immediately.”
Anna agreed to everything, but noted that at the present time it was her “time of the month”. I grimaced, as I will absolutely not go there (and she knows that). “Fine, next week we bang”, I said. She pointed out that I would be in the woods next week hunting sasquatch. “Fine, once I come out of the woods, then we bang – 48 hours straight”, I said. “Of course, darling!”, she agreed.
Well, it took several days to set up the hunt, but it finally happened. I was in Washington state at high elevation based on intel I has acquired that indicated that there was a monstrous 15’ tall sasquatch on the mountain range that had been murdering and eating hunters and hikers. After 3 months in these mountains without a trace of the creature I began to lose hope, thinking that I probably got some bad intel, or bad coordinates.
I got my satellite phone out to call for an extraction. Winter was setting in fast, and if I did not get off this mountain soon, then I would freeze and/or starve to death. Unfortunately, my contact did not answer. I tried for 2 days. No answer. I had been fucked. I wondered what had happened back in civilization that caused me to be abandoned like this. I resolved that I would get off that mountain and get to the bottom of this shit. There would be hell to pay for this betrayal!!’
I was able to get in touch with contacts from back home. I got old Billy Ray from Ellijay and Rattler on the phone and got them to come out here to Washington State to extract me. Rattler use to fly helicopters in the Army. He has an old Huey sitting in his front yard, to the chagrin of his HOA. He fired that sucker up, and him and old Billy Ray flew out here to my coordinates and extracted me.
After landing at a convenience store to buy some beer for the flight home, we headed east. Through the skies a way, Billy Ray said, “Well, Rod, I guess you is bout ready to git back home to Georgia, eh?” In fact, I was ready to go home. But I had to take care of some business first. I told them both to take me to New York City. They were both perplexed. All I said to them was “I have an old friend there I have to see before I can go home.”
I have intel on where Anna Conda stays when she is in the United States. She stays at certain hotels depending on what month she is here, and whether her check-in date is an odd or even number. This is for undercover work. I came across the code for her stays while doing the sasquatch work for China. She an I were caught in a snowstorm one night in Buffalo, NY, and had to share a room at the Holiday Inn near the airport. We had like 10 big Igloo ice chests with iced down sasquatch body parts with us in the room.
Anna was like, “No hanky panky, Rod. I am tired and I want to go to bed. Tomorrow we finish business.”
Frankly, I did not blame her for withholding her magnificent muff from me. I was tired as hell. But, I could not settle for nothing. So, when Anna was in the bathroom taking a shower, I started going through her suit case. I wanted to find some of her panties to jack off into. Instead, I found a little black notebook. Inside it contained her lodging codes, and some other interesting things. I photographed the contents with my phone and then put it back.
When Anna got out of the shower she was already dressed in her night clothes. She saw me lying on my back, nude on the bed, and jacking it. “Rod!! GROSS!!!! Go to the restroom to do that shit!!!”, she commanded. I just did it to get a rise out of her. LOL!!
So, if Anna is still inside the U.S., then using the codes I stole from her I can locate precisely where she will be that night. I studied it for a few moments then had my answer. Tonight she would be staying at the Dogman Inn on Hwy 95 South, Room 355. I told Rattler to get me there stat!
We had to stop several times for fuel and beer. Those Hueys go just a bit over a hundred MPH, you know. But eventually, we got there. I gave the boys some money and told them to go to the Waffle House for some coffee to sober up. Then they would fly me home.
I should mention that I also had Rattler’s fully auto Russian AK-74 with spare mags. During the long flight with 2 drunks from Washington State to New York City, I had worked myself up into a towering rage over how Anna fucked me on this Putin deal. She had clearly thrown me aside. But for what, exactly? I figured I would storm the hotel room, get some answers, then shower the room with gun fire.
I busted through the door of Room 355 at exactly 3:35 a.m. There she was. My entry roused her from slumber. I was pointing my rifle at her, center mass. She was shocked at the appearance of a gunman in her room at this time of night. However, she was not as shocked as one would think (this was not the first time something like this has happened to her).
I raised my face from the receiver just enough so she could see it was me. “Rod!!!”, she exclaimed. “What happened to you?!?!? I thought you had died up in those mountains when we never hear from you!” I replied, “Shove it up that cute little ass of yours, Anna. You fucked me. And not in the good way. What the fuck was all that shit about needing a sasquatch for Putin?!?”
Anna played dumb. But it struck me that I had been deliberately put out of the loop for 3 months. Why? Who wanted me away for that long, and why? What went on in my absence?!? I was just dying to know!!! I set my rifle down and pulled out my fixed blade knife, ready to get down to some real nasty work on Anna so I could get some truth. The pure evil of what I was about to do to her caused a wide death grin to grow on my face. Anna saw it. She knew what it meant. She swallowed hard and her eyes betrayed the shear terror she felt inside. I was engorged with blood lust. She knew she had fucked up one time too many this time!!
Suddenly came the sound of the toilet in the bathroom flushing. I was momentarily shocked. I did not expect anyone else to be there with Anna. Anna saw it in my face. I glanced at her and saw that the terror in her face was replaced with pleasure, a slight smile creeping over her face.
I was going to have to face off against this person in the bathroom, who would be out in a split moment. When I do that, I will have to turn 180 degrees from Anna, thereby making me vulnerable to her. I had only once choice: Shoot Anna first.
Just as this came to me, but just before I could act on it, the bathroom door opened. I had to deal with that person before Anna now. I spun around to see that it was a completely nude, and fat, white man. He was a real oafish blob. He looked surprised to see me. He also looked sort of familiar.
I next heard the crack of something hitting my skull hard. I remember the immediate hateful pain that shot through my body and the sound of blood rushing through my ears. I remember the dizziness, then falling to the floor. Clearly, as I fixed on the man from the bathroom, Anna had cracked me over the head with a blunt object.
I came to the next morning, Billy Ray and Rattler had manage to track me down based upon coordinates I left in the chopper that said “IN CASE OF EMERGENCY”. Billy Ray filled up the hotel room ice bucket with cold water and doused my head with it to bring me conscious. I was disoriented at first. But after a bit, what happened in this room the night before came back to me.
Honestly, I am surprised that Anna did not just kill me. I presume that she thinks she can leverage her drop-dead hotness to get me to do more shit for her in the future. She is absolutely right about that too. Rattler then said, “Hey, Rod, that snake bitch left a letter fer ya.”
He handed me the letter. This is what it said:
____________________________________________
“Dear Rod:
Sorry about the boo boo on your head. Hope it heals soon. Also sorry about leaving you in the mountains. I was not running a scam on you Rod. Rather, an opportunity arose for me to acquire a sasquatch body from another person. You may know him since you are a sasquatch hunter. His name is Matt Moneymaker. Anyway, until next time…..
Yours truly,
Anna Conda”
_____________________________________________
I could not fucking believe it. That was fatfuck Moneymaker in the hotel room earlier. Anna fucked Matt Fatfuck Moneymaker for a Sasquatch! That fat son of bitch!!
Billy Ray asked, “You ready to go Rod?” I stood up and said, “Yeah, let’s go.” Then Rattler said, “Hey, ya wanna stop and git some beer fer the ride home?” I replied “Hell yeah.”
I felt like I wanted to die. Thank God for beer and buddies. I don’t blame Anna. She is a fucking snake, and I knew that before this started. Also, I cannot really blame fatfuck Moneymaker for wanting to get some of that hot poon pie Anna serves up. I guess I have to blame fate for fucking me over this time. I even started thinking that next time I will just avoid Anna. But I know I won’t, thus making me subject to this sort of shit again. I had Rattler set us down in Charlottesville so I could buy some hard liquor.
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Anna and I first joined forces, so to speak, when she acted as a go-between in my business deal with the Chinese to sell them bigfoot parts. See, I would hunt and kill the critters, cut them up, deliver the parts to Anna, who in turn gave me a suitcase containing unmarked American hundred-dollar bills, then she would transport the bigfoot parts to the Chinese. I was never really sure of what the sneaky-ass Chinese were doing with the body parts. All I knew for sure is that they are extracting certain materials from them, then synthesizing them with some other shit, creating some sort of drug. Whether it then becomes a bio-weapon or a dick stimulant, I do not know. Neither do I care. As long as they kept the hundies coming, I was good.
Now, while Anna is of Russian descent, she is a freelancer. She will work for any sick, skeevy motherfucker out there. She does not care. She has no conscience, at least not in the traditional sense as we understand it in western civilization. Today she is working for the Chinese, and tomorrow she may be working for Hamas. She is a slippery motherfucker.
So here is how it went down. At 11:32 p.m. on a Friday in September of last year I get a call on my cell phone. When the call came in I was balls deep into this hot little lass I picked up at the bus station a little earlier in the evening from an old swarthy chap named “Colorado Joe”. He wanted to sell me the girl. I was assured she was over 20 years old. I told him I needed to take her out for a test ride, which he agreed to.
So, there I was, balls deep in “Bing Bang Yun”, and my phone rings. Of course, I silence all incoming calls not in my contacts list. Thus, I knew that I must know the caller. In mid stroke I reached over to the nightstand to retrieve my cell and looked at it. It was a call from “Sergio”. I thought, “Oh shit…. I am going to have to cut the Oriental bang circus short.” When Sergio calls, I have to respond…immediately. He has the best blow on the east coast!!
“Hey, Serge! What’s up?”, I asked. All he said was, “Hooters. 2:00 a.m.”, then hung up. This was obviously the rendezvous for the transaction. Now, understand that Serge was not talking about the chicken wing restaurant. Hooters was code, in case the feds were listening in on the line. “Hooters” meant the titty bar out on Highway 69 called “The Plump Rump”. We had a communications code we used.
It was a long haul to the titty bar, so I needed to get moving. I had no time to return the girl to Colorado Joe, so I took her with me. I had her blow me on the way to the meeting with Sergio, telling her that her performance would make the difference on whether I save her from Joe or not. Of course, after she was done I tossed her out of my speeding truck and down, over the bridge, and into the Wendigo River below. I did not need any complications in my life right now.
I arrived at The Plump Rump at 2:00 a.m. on the dot. I saw the manager, Lou Skunt, sitting at the bar when I walked inside. I nodded. He walked over and said to me, “Use my office for the meeting The parties are already in there waiting for you.” I nodded and then headed to Lou’s office. Then it hit me: Lou said the “PARTIES” are already here. That is, parties, meaning more than one person. It was not just Sergio. It was 2 or more people! Lou was probably in for a cut of whatever was about to go down.
Something was bad fucked up!! I know for a fact that Sergio never brings anyone with him on a deal, at least not with me. He is too distrustful of people to do that, and too fucking mean to need protection. Something was wrong. I was just as likely to get whacked when I enter Lou’s office as anything else. I needed a moment to think things through.
I took a spot in front of one of the performance poles to watch a young, swarthy Mexican lass perform. My mind quickly strayed from the problem at hand to this brown chick’s ass and tits. She was not a great looking chick, but her body was smoking!! I quickly became aroused. I thought to myself, “Goddamn Asian bitches!! They are just like Chinese food – after 2 hours you are ready for some more!!”
When the little Mexican chick went on break I motioned her over to my table. “Hola Senior!!”, she said. I pulled out a clear plastic baggie of blow and dropped it on the table. Her eyes grew wide and slobber starting falling from her mouth. Blow is like catnip for strippers. Thus, she fell under my spell immediately.
The next thing I know, this brown girl was on my lap, dry humping me like a feral bitch dog in heat. I had to bang her. I NEEDED to see my wang penetrating her. Just then, someone taps my shoulder hard. I look up to see Lou standing over me. He bent down and said, “Did you forget about my office, asshole?!?!?!” I replied, “Damn, Lou!! You read my mind!!!” I arose, with the little Mexican bolted onto my mid-section, and hastily retreated to Lou’s office. I figured Lou would prefer me to stain this chick in private rather than out in the open.
The door to the office opened easily. The lights were on inside. In a lustful haze, I set the little Mexican chick on her back across Lou’s desk and started pumping the shit out of her, completely unaware of the others in the room with us. In a moment I heard someone call my name. I twist my neck around to see Sergio sitting on Lou’s jizz crusted couch. I think to myself, “Oh shit! I forgot about that shit!”
I figured I would just move forward with the deal as it was proposed to me. “Hey Serge! What ya got for me, dude?”, I asked. He replied, “I have a very special deal for you. I need, uh … yeah, ……Hey, Rod, you want to stop for a moment so we can talk?” I picked up the little tamale and laid her down onto Sergio’s lap as I continued to plow her. She stayed on my cock the whole time. I told Sergio, “No, man. I’m good! Lay it on me!” Slowly, Sergio lowered his face into his palm.
Then it happened. The voice cam from behind me, in the dark corner of Lou’s office. It was velvety yet hard as steel. “Rod. Went need to talk”, it said. Even though I did not stop pumping the little brown chick, a chill went down my spine when I heard those words. It was the thick timbre of the voice, I think, that alerted me.
I turned to look across the room. There, sitting in a red leather captains chair against the wall was the source of the sultry voice: Anna Conda.
I picked up the little taco yet again and turned her around so I could face Anna as I continued pumping her. At this point the Mexican girl was merely a masturbation toy I was using. I increased my pump so I could dump my load and get this over with. Then BAMM!!!, it was over. I removed the lass from my huge rod, after which her body crumpled to the floor. I did not know if she was dead or injured, or what had happened to her. But I did not care either, so I did not dwell on it.
I tried to compose myself the best I could, then walked over to stand before Anna so I could get to the bottom of all this business. “Well, well, well. Anna Conda. We meet again. Tell me, what brings you here, to my little neck of the woods?”
Anna replied, “Rod, put your dick away.” I looked down and, indeed, I had forgotten to stow my cock. Out of pure curtesy, I packed it away. Then I returned my attention to Anna. “Alright, Anna, what’s going on here?”
Anna launched into a startling tale about what brought her to me. As she spoke I became lost in her wanton beauty. She got up from her chair and walked about the room as she relayed her story, presumably to make it more dramatic and demonstrative. I got a full-on view of her body, and it was fantastic!!
She stands 5’10’’ and weighs 105 lbs. She is lithe. She was showing it off too, wearing a black, silk dress that landed just about her ankles. The top was low-cut, betraying just a bit of cleavage from her C-cup wineglass titties. She was not wearing a bra. Anna never wears a bra. Her nips were perfectly outlined through the silk. In fact, I think her nips were hard. It was probably something she did on purpose in an attempt to influence me. It was working.
Anna’s ass was perfect. It was not at all fat, but round enough not to be skinny. It was a fit figure skater’s ass. As she walked, I could see a tiny bit of jiggle emanating from her ass flesh, and then reverberated in the silky black dress she wore. My cock began growing hard again.
Her face was beautiful. Think Scarlett Johanson and Phoebe Cates rolled into one. But any sweetness this may evoke is quickly dispelled by Anna’s throaty voice with its thick Russian accent. I have known Anna for 20 years. Yet, she still does not look a day over 25. Jesus Christ!!! If ever there was a chick to die for ….. If I was one to delve into the belief of the paranormal, then I may conclude that Anna made a deal with the devil. But, I am not such a person.
And literally, Anna Conda is a chick to die for. She is deadly as fuck. She will kill you in a split second without a thought just because she does not like the shirt you are wearing. She can do it too. She is always armed and she knows how to use her weapons. Moreover, she is a total psychopath. This makes her doubly dangerous.
Anna and I have always gotten along for the most part. Like Anna, the dollar is my primary motivating factor. Such a mindset allows for understanding and predictability among people, which are elements that are sorely missing in many business dealings today that go on in the color of darkness.
Suddenly, Anna snapped me out of my thoughts. “Here’s your gun, Rod. Now let’s get started”, said Anna. She and Sergio were halfway through the door exiting Lou’s office when I said, “Hey, wait a damned minute!!! What are you talking about?!?”
They both stopped, and Anna walked back in and looked me in the eyes, saying “The plan, Rod. Let’s get on with the plan.” A little embarrassed, I sheepishly asked, “What plan?” Anna folded her arms and looked cross at me. After a moment to allow me to simmer in my shame, she asked, “You were not paying attention, were you, Rod?” I shook my head and looked down.
I heard a hammer cock. I jerked my head back up to find myself staring down the barrel of a pistol pointed at my head that Anna was holding. I protested, “Look, it is not my fucking fault!! Put that fucking gun down!!!” I continued, “You were distracting me with …. Well.. you know, how you are dressed, and that hot, sultry voice…. You know?”
“So, instead of paying attention to the plan, you chose to eye-rape me. Is that what I am to understand your position is, Rod?”, she asked. Knowing that my life was on the line, I said, “Anna, look, you know I am horny to a fault. Then you come in here, swinging them tits around, wearing that silk dress showing off the crack of your ass…. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU EXPECT TO HAPPENED?”
Anna lowered her gun. She knew that my explanation of being a total cocksman was truth. “Let’s go”, Anna curtly said. I obeyed.
Anna explained the plan to me again on the drive from The Plump Rump. She made me wear a blindfold so that I would not get horny during her explanation. Here is how it went:
Anna Conda was now working for the Russians. It seems that Putin caught wind of the Sasquatch project that the Chinese were working on. He also knew that the American government have been fucking with sasquatch for decades. Thus, he was very concerned about the existence of a bigfoot gap. He ordered the acquisition of a Sasquatch specimen immediately.
Moreover, said specimen must be prime. It needed to be the biggest, baddest sasquatch of them all – a true alpha – so as to speed things along. Putin did not want some weird shit-creature, is-it-a-sasquatch-or-is-it-a-dogman, kind of monstrosity. He wanted purebred, badass sasquatchery, and preferably from the American Pacific northwest.
Anna got in on it because she sold the intel to Putin about China’s Sasquatch operation. She then told Putin she could produce sasquatch corpses for him. She told him she had a contact (i.e., me). Thus, with Putin’s blessing and promises of riches to come, Anna set out to America to find me.
Now, here is where things got a bit squirrely. See, I agreed to procure some more dead sasquatch. I have no problem with killing sasquatch because, in my opinion, they are an abomination on this Earth. I kind of feel like I am doing God’s work by wiping out as many of them as I can. And given all the not-so-Godly stuff I have done, I feel like killing Sasquatch kind of offsets that to some degree.
But Anna, she was stuck on Putin’s instruction that she must supply him with apex Sasquatch. So she did not want to take my advice of heading to the Pacific Northwest or Alaska. Instead, Anna claimed to have pinpointed the whereabouts of a particularly gruesome sasquatch beast that she KNEW would win her a fortune from Putin if she brought it to him.
“So, where is this beast?”, I asked. Anna replied “Martha’s Vineyard”. I paused. Then I asked her to repeat herself. It turns out that I was not mistaken about what Anna had said. I continued, “Uh, Anna, there are no sasquatch on Martha’s Vineyard, just a lot of wealth New Englander schmucks.”
Anna looked at me and told me I was wrong. Then she decided to attempt to taunt me. “Oh, Rod, mighty slayer of Bigfoot! Yet, you fail to take notice of where the biggest, most foul and rotten beast of them all makes its home. Jesus, Rod!! What kind of bigfoot hunter are you, anyway?” Anna then spit at my feet and wondered aloud whether she even needs me for this job.
I decided that I needed to straighten out the hierarchy here in order for this here deal to move forward. I said, “Well, Anna, feel free to truck on over to Old Whitey Beach and battle that beast. But, if there is a big old mangy sasquatch lurking around over there, then it is probably a fucking Nazi-Squatch. You know, those fuckers out there hate the Jews.”
The work “Nazi” visibly shook Anna. Her great grandfather died defending Leningrad. Her entire family there died of either starvation or cannibalism during Hitler’s siege during Operation Barbarossa. Anna despised Nazis. But she feared them too. After landing that punch, I decided to push my luck.
“Now, I am still willing to help you catch this here Nazi-Squatch, but you have to do something for me”, I said. Now Anna’s eyes were on me, and they were narrowing. I continued, “I want you to get bare assed naked and pleasure yourself while I stand over you and jack it.” Anna stared at me silently for a long moment. Then she replied.
“After the job is done, and you can get none of your … fluids… on me”, she said. I shook my head and countered, “Now, and I will ‘try’ to not get my spunk on you.”
However, Anna then turned the tables on me. In fact, she picked up the table and bashed my head in with it. She looked me in my eyes, then matter-of-factly said, “You get the beast, and your prize shall be a night with me, anything goes, darling.” Well, since this caused all of the blood to immediately drain from my brain, I had a lapse in judgment. “DEAL!!”, I said. Then we shook on it.
“OK, tell me more about this supposed monster sasquatch on Martha’s Vineyard”, I said. I still was not ready to believe there was a monster out there. “I show you photo”, said Anna. She took out her phone, scrolled to find the photo, then handed the phone to me. “There. Sasquatch”, she said.
I stared at the photo and remained silent. After a long moment, I turned the phone so that Anna could see the photo and asked, “Uh, Anna, is THIS what you intended to show me?” She replied. “Yes! There…Sasquatch! The biggest, grossest monster around.”
Now, I could not argue with Anna that the image on her phone is a big, gross monster. Hell, it could actually be a sasquatch, and THE UBER sasquatch. It is most certainly the grossest thing on Martha’s Vinyard. But I somehow do not think this is what Putin is expecting.
I turned to Anna and said, “Anna, this is a photo of Michelle Obama. I know it looks vile, and has a huge, hulking body with large appendages where a woman should not have them. But, sweatheart, that ain’t no sasquatch. That’s a big, hairy Chicago street negro.”
Anna did not believe me at first. She was hard in her conviction that Obama was a sasquatch. “I have seen the Sasquatch beast you deliver to me for China. This … Michelle Obama …. It is big, and hairy, and ugly like the sasquatch beast, but worse.”
When the truth finally set it, I could see that it had kind of broken down poor Anna, if only just a bit. I put my arm around Anna and told her, “Look, Michelle O fooled you. Hell, she and her Hamas Hubby fooled millions of Americans, twice! At least you saw Michelle for what she is, to wit: a big, gross sasquatch, and NOT some kind a retarded leftist messiah.”
After that, things took a rather dark turn. “What if we still take her to Putin? We can make deal; sell her to Putin!!” At this point I held up my hands and said, “I’m out”, then turned and walked away. Anna followed, trying to get me to stay. At this point, I could tell that Anna was coming undone a little.
See, she had to produce for Putin. There is no telling what kind of secret deal she actually had with him. She had to deliver a big old mangy Obama …. Er, uh, I mean … Sasquatch, to Putin.
“Ok, Rod, we do your plan. We go out west to kill bigfoot. Huge, monster bigfoot. she said. I turned and looked Anna in her eyes and said the following: First, we bang for 48 hours straight, right now, so I can get my fill of you. Second, you pay me $10,000.00 cash upfront. Third, upon delivery of the dead bigfoot, you pay me $1 million immediately.”
Anna agreed to everything, but noted that at the present time it was her “time of the month”. I grimaced, as I will absolutely not go there (and she knows that). “Fine, next week we bang”, I said. She pointed out that I would be in the woods next week hunting sasquatch. “Fine, once I come out of the woods, then we bang – 48 hours straight”, I said. “Of course, darling!”, she agreed.
Well, it took several days to set up the hunt, but it finally happened. I was in Washington state at high elevation based on intel I has acquired that indicated that there was a monstrous 15’ tall sasquatch on the mountain range that had been murdering and eating hunters and hikers. After 3 months in these mountains without a trace of the creature I began to lose hope, thinking that I probably got some bad intel, or bad coordinates.
I got my satellite phone out to call for an extraction. Winter was setting in fast, and if I did not get off this mountain soon, then I would freeze and/or starve to death. Unfortunately, my contact did not answer. I tried for 2 days. No answer. I had been fucked. I wondered what had happened back in civilization that caused me to be abandoned like this. I resolved that I would get off that mountain and get to the bottom of this shit. There would be hell to pay for this betrayal!!’
I was able to get in touch with contacts from back home. I got old Billy Ray from Ellijay and Rattler on the phone and got them to come out here to Washington State to extract me. Rattler use to fly helicopters in the Army. He has an old Huey sitting in his front yard, to the chagrin of his HOA. He fired that sucker up, and him and old Billy Ray flew out here to my coordinates and extracted me.
After landing at a convenience store to buy some beer for the flight home, we headed east. Through the skies a way, Billy Ray said, “Well, Rod, I guess you is bout ready to git back home to Georgia, eh?” In fact, I was ready to go home. But I had to take care of some business first. I told them both to take me to New York City. They were both perplexed. All I said to them was “I have an old friend there I have to see before I can go home.”
I have intel on where Anna Conda stays when she is in the United States. She stays at certain hotels depending on what month she is here, and whether her check-in date is an odd or even number. This is for undercover work. I came across the code for her stays while doing the sasquatch work for China. She an I were caught in a snowstorm one night in Buffalo, NY, and had to share a room at the Holiday Inn near the airport. We had like 10 big Igloo ice chests with iced down sasquatch body parts with us in the room.
Anna was like, “No hanky panky, Rod. I am tired and I want to go to bed. Tomorrow we finish business.”
Frankly, I did not blame her for withholding her magnificent muff from me. I was tired as hell. But, I could not settle for nothing. So, when Anna was in the bathroom taking a shower, I started going through her suit case. I wanted to find some of her panties to jack off into. Instead, I found a little black notebook. Inside it contained her lodging codes, and some other interesting things. I photographed the contents with my phone and then put it back.
When Anna got out of the shower she was already dressed in her night clothes. She saw me lying on my back, nude on the bed, and jacking it. “Rod!! GROSS!!!! Go to the restroom to do that shit!!!”, she commanded. I just did it to get a rise out of her. LOL!!
So, if Anna is still inside the U.S., then using the codes I stole from her I can locate precisely where she will be that night. I studied it for a few moments then had my answer. Tonight she would be staying at the Dogman Inn on Hwy 95 South, Room 355. I told Rattler to get me there stat!
We had to stop several times for fuel and beer. Those Hueys go just a bit over a hundred MPH, you know. But eventually, we got there. I gave the boys some money and told them to go to the Waffle House for some coffee to sober up. Then they would fly me home.
I should mention that I also had Rattler’s fully auto Russian AK-74 with spare mags. During the long flight with 2 drunks from Washington State to New York City, I had worked myself up into a towering rage over how Anna fucked me on this Putin deal. She had clearly thrown me aside. But for what, exactly? I figured I would storm the hotel room, get some answers, then shower the room with gun fire.
I busted through the door of Room 355 at exactly 3:35 a.m. There she was. My entry roused her from slumber. I was pointing my rifle at her, center mass. She was shocked at the appearance of a gunman in her room at this time of night. However, she was not as shocked as one would think (this was not the first time something like this has happened to her).
I raised my face from the receiver just enough so she could see it was me. “Rod!!!”, she exclaimed. “What happened to you?!?!? I thought you had died up in those mountains when we never hear from you!” I replied, “Shove it up that cute little ass of yours, Anna. You fucked me. And not in the good way. What the fuck was all that shit about needing a sasquatch for Putin?!?”
Anna played dumb. But it struck me that I had been deliberately put out of the loop for 3 months. Why? Who wanted me away for that long, and why? What went on in my absence?!? I was just dying to know!!! I set my rifle down and pulled out my fixed blade knife, ready to get down to some real nasty work on Anna so I could get some truth. The pure evil of what I was about to do to her caused a wide death grin to grow on my face. Anna saw it. She knew what it meant. She swallowed hard and her eyes betrayed the shear terror she felt inside. I was engorged with blood lust. She knew she had fucked up one time too many this time!!
Suddenly came the sound of the toilet in the bathroom flushing. I was momentarily shocked. I did not expect anyone else to be there with Anna. Anna saw it in my face. I glanced at her and saw that the terror in her face was replaced with pleasure, a slight smile creeping over her face.
I was going to have to face off against this person in the bathroom, who would be out in a split moment. When I do that, I will have to turn 180 degrees from Anna, thereby making me vulnerable to her. I had only once choice: Shoot Anna first.
Just as this came to me, but just before I could act on it, the bathroom door opened. I had to deal with that person before Anna now. I spun around to see that it was a completely nude, and fat, white man. He was a real oafish blob. He looked surprised to see me. He also looked sort of familiar.
I next heard the crack of something hitting my skull hard. I remember the immediate hateful pain that shot through my body and the sound of blood rushing through my ears. I remember the dizziness, then falling to the floor. Clearly, as I fixed on the man from the bathroom, Anna had cracked me over the head with a blunt object.
I came to the next morning, Billy Ray and Rattler had manage to track me down based upon coordinates I left in the chopper that said “IN CASE OF EMERGENCY”. Billy Ray filled up the hotel room ice bucket with cold water and doused my head with it to bring me conscious. I was disoriented at first. But after a bit, what happened in this room the night before came back to me.
Honestly, I am surprised that Anna did not just kill me. I presume that she thinks she can leverage her drop-dead hotness to get me to do more shit for her in the future. She is absolutely right about that too. Rattler then said, “Hey, Rod, that snake bitch left a letter fer ya.”
He handed me the letter. This is what it said:
____________________________________________
“Dear Rod:
Sorry about the boo boo on your head. Hope it heals soon. Also sorry about leaving you in the mountains. I was not running a scam on you Rod. Rather, an opportunity arose for me to acquire a sasquatch body from another person. You may know him since you are a sasquatch hunter. His name is Matt Moneymaker. Anyway, until next time…..
Yours truly,
Anna Conda”
_____________________________________________
I could not fucking believe it. That was fatfuck Moneymaker in the hotel room earlier. Anna fucked Matt Fatfuck Moneymaker for a Sasquatch! That fat son of bitch!!
Billy Ray asked, “You ready to go Rod?” I stood up and said, “Yeah, let’s go.” Then Rattler said, “Hey, ya wanna stop and git some beer fer the ride home?” I replied “Hell yeah.”
I felt like I wanted to die. Thank God for beer and buddies. I don’t blame Anna. She is a fucking snake, and I knew that before this started. Also, I cannot really blame fatfuck Moneymaker for wanting to get some of that hot poon pie Anna serves up. I guess I have to blame fate for fucking me over this time. I even started thinking that next time I will just avoid Anna. But I know I won’t, thus making me subject to this sort of shit again. I had Rattler set us down in Charlottesville so I could buy some hard liquor.
2024.05.13 18:26 MedicalJello2 Post Match Thread: County Championship, Division 1 - Round 6
Match 22: Hampshire v Durham
Date: 10 May - 13 May 2024
Venue: The Rose Bowl, Southampton
Toss: Hampshire won the toss & elected to bat first
Innings: 1 - Hampshire
Innings: 2 - Durham
Innings: 3 - Hampshire
Result: Match drawn
Scorecard
Match 23: Worcestershire v Kent
Date: 10 May - 13 May 2024
Venue: St Lawrence Ground, Canterbury
Toss: Worcestershire won the toss & elected to bat first
Innings: 1 - Worcestershire
Innings: 2 - Kent (f/o)
Innings: 3 - Kent
Result: Match drawn
Scorecard
Match 24: Lancashire v Nottinghamshire
Date: 10 May - 13 May 2024
Venue: Trent Bridge, Nottingham
Toss: Lancashire won the toss & elected to bat first
Innings: 1 - Lancashire
Innings: 2 - Nottinghamshire
Innings: 3 - Lancashire
Innings: 4 - Nottinghamshire
Result: Nottinghamshire won by 9 wickets
Scorecard
Match 25: Warwickshire v Surrey
Date: 10 May - 13 May 2024
Venue: Kennington Oval, London
Toss: Surrey won the toss & elected to field first
Innings: 1 - Warwickshire
Innings: 2 - Surrey
Innings: 3 - Warwickshire
Innings: 4 - Surrey
Result: Surrey won by 9 wickets
Scorecard
Round 1 Round 2 Round 3 Round 4 Round 5
submitted by MedicalJello2 to Cricket [link] [comments]
Date: 10 May - 13 May 2024
Venue: The Rose Bowl, Southampton
Toss: Hampshire won the toss & elected to bat first
| Innings | Score |
|---|---|
| Hampshire | 503 (Ov 146.4) |
| Durham | 432 (Ov 148.5) |
| Hampshire | 62/2 (Ov 37) |
Innings: 1 - Hampshire
| Batter | Runs | Bowlers | Wickets |
|---|---|---|---|
| Ali Orr | 126 (211) | Callum Parkinson | 4/176 (43) |
| Tom Prest | 102 (163) | Peter Siddle | 3/74 (23.4) |
Innings: 2 - Durham
| Batter | Runs | Bowlers | Wickets |
|---|---|---|---|
| David Bedingham | 144 (294) | Liam Dawson | 5/184 (66) |
| Alex Lees | 71 (132) | Felix Organ | 4/101 (42.5) |
Innings: 3 - Hampshire
| Batter | Runs | Bowlers | Wickets |
|---|---|---|---|
| James Vince* | 35 (108) | Matthew Potts | 2/19 (10) |
| Felix Organ* | 18 (99) | Colin Ackermann | 0/2 (4) |
Result: Match drawn
Scorecard
Match 23: Worcestershire v Kent
Date: 10 May - 13 May 2024
Venue: St Lawrence Ground, Canterbury
Toss: Worcestershire won the toss & elected to bat first
| Innings | Score |
|---|---|
| Worcestershire | 618/7d (Ov 158.5) |
| Kent (f/o) | 407 (Ov 149.2) |
| Kent | 146/4 (Ov 57) |
Innings: 1 - Worcestershire
| Batter | Runs | Bowlers | Wickets |
|---|---|---|---|
| Jason Holder* | 123 (110) | Joey Evison | 3/58 (26) |
| Gareth Roderick | 117 (281) | Matt Parkinson | 3/201 (44.5) |
Innings: 2 - Kent (f/o)
| Batter | Runs | Bowlers | Wickets |
|---|---|---|---|
| Jack Leaning* | 179 (403) | Joe Leach | 3/37 (25) |
| Daniel Bell-Drummond | 67 (111) | Matthew Waite | 3/51 (18) |
Innings: 3 - Kent
| Batter | Runs | Bowlers | Wickets |
|---|---|---|---|
| Harry Finch* | 48 (116) | Ben Gibbon | 2/38 (10) |
| Daniel Bell-Drummond | 41 (116) | Jason Holder | 1/9 (4) |
Result: Match drawn
Scorecard
Match 24: Lancashire v Nottinghamshire
Date: 10 May - 13 May 2024
Venue: Trent Bridge, Nottingham
Toss: Lancashire won the toss & elected to bat first
| Innings | Score |
|---|---|
| Lancashire | 331 (Ov 100.) |
| Nottinghamshire | 503 (Ov 153.4) |
| Lancashire | 252 (74.3) |
| Nottinghamshire | 81/1 (Ov 18.4) |
Innings: 1 - Lancashire
| Batter | Runs | Bowlers | Wickets |
|---|---|---|---|
| Keaton Jennings | 91 (180) | Olly Stone | 3/56 (23.2) |
| Tom Bruce | 73 (115) | Dillon Pennington | 3/68 (24) |
Innings: 2 - Nottinghamshire
| Batter | Runs | Bowlers | Wickets |
|---|---|---|---|
| Haseeb Hameed* | 247 (459) | George Balderson | 4/102 (30) |
| Olly Stone | 90 (162) | Tom Bailey | 2/124 (33) |
Innings: 3 - Lancashire
| Batter | Runs | Bowlers | Wickets |
|---|---|---|---|
| Matthew Hurst | 104 (158) | Dillon Pennington | 4/61 (19) |
| Tom Hartley | 50 (100) | Calvin Harrison | 2/52 (12) |
Innings: 4 - Nottinghamshire
| Batter | Runs | Bowlers | Wickets |
|---|---|---|---|
| Ben Slater | 31 (32) | Saqib Mahmood | 1/22 (5) |
| Haseeb Hameed* | 24 (50) | Will Williams | 0/6 (2) |
Result: Nottinghamshire won by 9 wickets
Scorecard
Match 25: Warwickshire v Surrey
Date: 10 May - 13 May 2024
Venue: Kennington Oval, London
Toss: Surrey won the toss & elected to field first
| Innings | Score |
|---|---|
| Warwickshire | 343 (Ov 102.5) |
| Surrey | 464 (Ov 111.4) |
| Warwickshire | 209 (Ov 59) |
| Surrey | 89/1 (Ov 22.4) |
Innings: 1 - Warwickshire
| Batter | Runs | Bowlers | Wickets |
|---|---|---|---|
| Ed Barnard | 108 (179) | Jordan Clark | 4/65 (24) |
| Will Rhodes | 36 (107) | Sean Abbott | 2/51 (20) |
Innings: 2 - Surrey
| Batter | Runs | Bowlers | Wickets |
|---|---|---|---|
| Jamie Smith | 155 (179) | Craig Miles | 5/43 (14) |
| Dom Sibley | 64 (140) | Ed Barnard | 2/100 (20.4) |
Innings: 3 - Warwickshire
| Batter | Runs | Bowlers | Wickets |
|---|---|---|---|
| Rob Yates | 52 (68) | Kemar Roach | 6/46 (14) |
| Ed Barnard | 44 (94) | Jordan Clark | 1/31 (12) |
Innings: 4 - Surrey
| Batter | Runs | Bowlers | Wickets |
|---|---|---|---|
| Dom Sibley* | 46 (79) | Jacob Bethell | 1/38 (8) |
| Rory Burns | 30 (41) | Rob Yates | 0/23 (7.4) |
Result: Surrey won by 9 wickets
Scorecard
Points Table:-
| Team | Matches | Won | Lost | Tied | Drew | N/R | Points |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Surrey | 5 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 95 |
| Essex | 5 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 74 |
| Somerset | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 72 |
| Nottinghamshire | 5 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 65 |
| Durham | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 61 |
| Warwickshire | 5 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 59 |
| Worcestershire | 5 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 58 |
| Kent | 5 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 56 |
| Hampshire | 5 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 44 |
| Lancashire | 5 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 31 |
Upcoming Fixtures:-
| Date | Match | Venue | Time |
|---|---|---|---|
| 17 May - 20 May 2024 | Essex v Warwickshire | County Ground, Chelmsford | 11:00 (GMT) |
| 17 May - 20 May 2024 | Lancashire v Durham | Stanley Park, Blackpool | 11:00 (GMT) |
| 17 May - 20 May 2024 | Nottinghamshire v Hampshire | Trent Bridge, Nottingham | 11:00 (GMT) |
| 17 May - 20 May 2024 | Somerset v Kent | County Ground, Taunton | 11:00 (GMT) |
| 17 May - 20 May 2024 | Surrey v Worcesetershire | Kennington Oval, London | 11:00 (GMT) |
Round 1 Round 2 Round 3 Round 4 Round 5
2024.05.13 16:48 MedicalJello2 Post Match Thread: County Championship, Division 2 - Round 6
Match 19: Glamorgan v Sussex
Date: 10 May - 13 May 2024
Venue: Sophia Gardens, Cardiff
Toss: Glamorgan won the toss & elected to field first
Innings: 1 - Sussex
Innings: 2 - Glamorgan
Innings: 3 - Sussex
Innings: 4 - Glamorgan
Result: Glamorgan won by 9 wickets
Scorecard
Match 20: Gloucestershire v Northamptonshire
Date: 10 May - 13 May 2024
Venue: County Ground, Northampton
Toss: Northamptonshire won the toss & elected to field first
Innings: 1 - Gloucestershire
Innings: 2 - Northamptonshire
Innings: 3 - Gloucestershire
Innings: 4 - Northamptonshire
Result: Gloucestershire won by 256 runs
Scorecard
Round 1 Round 2 Round 3 Round 4 Round 5
submitted by MedicalJello2 to Cricket [link] [comments]
Date: 10 May - 13 May 2024
Venue: Sophia Gardens, Cardiff
Toss: Glamorgan won the toss & elected to field first
| Innings | Score |
|---|---|
| Sussex | 278 (Ov 87.2) |
| Glamorgan | 411 (Ov 102.2) |
| Sussex | 188 (Ov 49.3) |
| Glamorgan | 58/1 (Ov 7.5) |
Innings: 1 - Sussex
| Batter | Runs | Bowler | Wickets |
|---|---|---|---|
| Fynn Hudson-Prentice | 48 (64) | Mir Hamza | 4/70 (23) |
| Cheteshwar Pujara | 41 (77) | James Harris | 4/93 (25) |
| Batter | Runs | Bowler | Wickets |
|---|---|---|---|
| Colin Ingram | 170 (248) | Jayden Seales | 5/101 (23.2) |
| Kiran Carlson | 148 (217) | Danny Lamb | 2/66 (19) |
Innings: 3 - Sussex
| Batter | Runs | Bowler | Wickets |
|---|---|---|---|
| Fynn Hudson-Prentice | 70 (74) | Andy Gorvin | 5/40 (13) |
| James Coles* | 61 (124) | Mir Hamza | 3/34 (14) |
Innings: 4 - Glamorgan
| Batter | Runs | Bowler | Wickets |
|---|---|---|---|
| Billy Root* | 36 (28) | Aristides Karvelas | 1/33 (3.5) |
| Eddie Byrom | 21 (11) | Danny Lamb | 0/4 (2) |
Result: Glamorgan won by 9 wickets
Scorecard
Match 20: Gloucestershire v Northamptonshire
Date: 10 May - 13 May 2024
Venue: County Ground, Northampton
Toss: Northamptonshire won the toss & elected to field first
| Innings | Score |
|---|---|
| Gloucestershire | 409 (Ov 107.2) |
| Northamptonshire | 171 (Ov 58.4) |
| Gloucestershire | 319/5d (Ov 71.4) |
| Northamptonshire | 301 (Ov 94.2) |
Innings: 1 - Gloucestershire
| Batter | Runs | Bowler | Wickets |
|---|---|---|---|
| Miles Hammond | 112 (133) | Siddarth Kaul | 5/76 (29) |
| Cameron Bancroft | 53 (94) | Liam Patterson-White | 2/62 (16.2) |
Innings: 2 - Northamptonshire
| Batter | Runs | Bowler | Wickets |
|---|---|---|---|
| Ricardo Vasconcelos | 43 (45) | Marchant de Lange | 5/42 (16) |
| Luke Procter | 32 (67) | Zafar Gohar | 2/29 (15) |
Innings: 3 - Gloucestershire
| Batter | Runs | Bowler | Wickets |
|---|---|---|---|
| Cameron Bancroft* | 130 (205) | Liam Patterson-White | 3/110 (29) |
| Graeme van Buuren | 67 (57) | Siddarth Kaul | 1/39 (8.4) |
Innings: 4 - Northamptonshire
| Batter | Runs | Bowler | Wickets |
|---|---|---|---|
| Emilio Gay | 74 (118) | Marchant de Lange | 3/58 (20) |
| Karun Nair | 61 (93) | Ajeet Singh Dale | 3/69 (15.2) |
Result: Gloucestershire won by 256 runs
Scorecard
Points Table:-
| Team | Matches | Won | Lost | Tied | Drew | N/R | Points |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Sussex | 5 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 78 |
| Middlesex | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 68 |
| Leicestershire | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 68 |
| Glamorgan | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 67 |
| Gloucestershire | 5 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 62 |
| Yorkshire | 5 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 60 |
| Northamptonshire | 5 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 57 |
| Derbyshire | 5 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 43 |
Upcoming Fixtures:-
| Date | Match | Venue | Time |
|---|---|---|---|
| 17 May - 20 May 2024 | Derbyshire v Northamptonshire | County Ground, Derby | 11:00 (GMT) |
| 17 May - 20 May 2024 | Glamorgan v Middlesex | Sophia Gardens, Cardiff | 11:00 (GMT) |
| 17 May - 20 May 2024 | Leicestershire v Gloucestershire | Grace Road, Leicester | 11:00 (GMT) |
| 17 May - 20 May 2024 | Sussex v Yorkshire | County Ground, Hove | 11:00 (GMT) |
Round 1 Round 2 Round 3 Round 4 Round 5
2024.05.13 04:09 Novel-Art3412 Solo Trip Report: Monteverde, Arenal, and Tortuguero ($1300 Budget)
I just got back from an amazing trip to Costa Rica, spending around $1300 on activities, transportation, hostels, food, and souvenirs.
A few things I wish I knew before my trip: you need to drink tons of water and electrolytes everyday since it's so hot and humid, you will get bug bites no matter what you do so bring anti itch cream, having a small towel to dry your hands is helpful since a lot of bathrooms don't have hand towels or dryer, people are very appreciative of you knowing a small amount of Spanish.
Here's my trip report:
DAY 0:
I flew into San Jose in the evening and stayed at Stray Cat Hostel (arranged transportation through the hostel).
Stray Cat Hostel: Pros- very clean, cats, employees were very nice Cons- hostel was overbooked (given option of bed in mixed dormitority or room in hotel across the streer), limited bathrooms, lack of shelves in bathrooms/showers.
DAY 1:
I had a breakfast of eggs, beans, and rice at Stray Cat Hostel and walked 10 minutes to bus stop for Transmonteverde public bus (booked online in advance). The neighborhood was pretty quiet, mainly residential and I felt safe, though I was alert and had directions in one ear bud and the other ear bud out so I could hear around me.
At the bus station there was a long line of people waiting, but i wasn't sure for what bus. I asked the employee at the bus station for where the bus to Transmontevde is and he directed me through the turnstiles and down to the bus.
The bus seats had little leg room and not much room for you to have your bag with you unless you had an empty seat next to you. We stopped 2.5 hours into the bus ride at Restaurante Vista Al Mar, which had bathrooms (free), some food, and cold drinks. This was about a 20 minute break. The road became very twisty in the last hour to Santa Elena.
The bus stopped at on the hill in Santa Elena, a short walk to the main town area. I got lunch at the Orchid Cafe, which was pricey, but had a nice setting and large servings.
There is a bank right by Orchid Cafe, as well as an ATM across the street from the tourist info center. I found that there's a great bakery called Panaderia el hornito de pilo, right across the street from the bus station that has inexpensive and yummy pastries (approx. 800 CRC each).
Booked the shuttle to Monteverde Cloud Forest through my hostel, OutBox Inn. Hiked the recommended trail loop, which included a suspension bridge (easy hike and well signed) and saw quetzal and coati very close. I had dinner at Taco Taco, which was pricey but had good food and nice energetic atmosphere.
OutBox Inn: Pros- very clean, perfect location to access everything, lovely patio with forest view, nice common area Cons- cockroach on toilet seat (screen in window doesn't close all the way)
DAY 2:
I had a leftover pastry from the bakery the day before for breakfast and was picked up for ziplining by Treetopia (over $100). There were 7 ziplines and I chose the company because they're the only one that has automatic braking. It felt very safe and was so much fun after I got over the nerves on the first two. Most of the employees seemed to speak English. There was a tandem zipline at the end that you need two people for. If you're solo like me you'll need to pair up with another person. There is an expensive gift shop and restaurant once you finish ziplining (plus you can pay $25 for your photos and videos).
For lunch I got a sandwich from a Cafe and ate it on the OutBox patio, then got picked up for Don Juan cacao, Sugarcane, and coffee tour. The guide had a great sense of humor and it was an interactive tour. Got dinner afterwards at Tico y Rico, which was around $19 for a vegetarian casado and soursop smoothie (large portions and friendly employees who asked if I have any allergies).
DAY 3:
Got pastries again from the same bakery before getting picked up by Caribe shuttle to go to La Fortuna. 45 minutes into the drive we stopped at an expensive store and restaurant for a short break, then drove another 45 minutes to Lake Arenal to catch a boat ride (45 minutes) and then another 30 minutes via shuttle to downtown La Fortuna. It was really nice to have a backpack instead of having to carry or drag a suitcase across the sand to board the boat across Lake Arenal (which I saw many people struggle with).
I checked into Hotel La Choza Inn and booked the unlimited Shuttle at the front desk ($20). There is a bank just by the park in La Fortuna, which was helpful since the hostel only took cash.
Lunch was at Soda Hormiga, which had gotten recommended, but while the food was pretty good and reasonably priced (about $6.5 for rice, beans, and plantains plus juice), I found that the employees weren't very friendly.
In the afternoon I took the unlimited Shuttle to Lago Parque Ecologico Volcan Arenal, where I hiked for a couple hours (which ended up being a mistake since it was so hot out). The park was beautiful and not crowded at all, I only saw a handful of tourists the whole time (plus a large group of schoolchildren).
I ended up deciding to go to Clinica Benitas since I wasn't feeling great and it has good reviews (plus was right by downtown). The doctors and staff were wonderful and made me feel as comfortable as possible. They were able to diagnosis and prescribe medication to help me feel better. I ended up costing about $400 for everything (including labwork) and then another $40 for medications at the pharmacy.
I had dinner at Spec-taco-lar, which was pretty good and had nice people watching.
La Choza Inn: Pros- inexpensive, easy to meet people, free breakfast, nice courtyard area, 24/7 reception and locked gate at night, easy to walk to everything in La Fortuna, air conditioning Cons- thin sheets with small hole, only one bathroom for 10 people (although there's a couple toilets downstairs by the courtyard), shuttle driver wasn't very friendly, open window in shower that allows bugs to get in.
DAY 4:
I had breakfast at La Choza Inn (eggs, beans and rice, juice, banana, toast) and had a relaxing morning. I got lunch from Chipotle's, where the sweetest woman works. She was so helpful and told me to ask her if I have any questions at all.
I then scheduled a wildlife tour walk through La Fortuna Hikes and Trails, which was a 15 minute walk from downtown. Sergio was an amazing guide and was so knowledge about all the wildlife. We saw sloths, bats, blue jean posion dart frogs, a Fer du Lance snake, a lizard, and a turkey like bird. The walk was only $32 for nearly 3 hours! We ended the tour with sugar cane juice and tortilla making with two abuelas, who then gave us tacos, dessert, and juice (all part of the price!).
I didn't have enough time to go to the waterfall, so I decided to go to Relax Termalitas hot springs instead ($18 plus a couple dollars for locker renral) which was like a casual resort with many different pools of different temperatures. I took an Uber there and back and it was pretty easy and cheap. I ended the day at Open Kitchen, which was expensive, but had huge portions.
DAY 5:
I took a shuttle (booked through Caribe) from La Choza Inn at 5:30 AM to get to Tortuguero. We stopped about 2 hours in for the included breakfast, then had another 1.5 hours or so on the shuttle and then took a 45 minute boat to Tortuguero. We saw a crocodile and river otter in the canals.
I checked into Aracari Garden Hostel and booked a night walk ($30) at the front desk. Lunch was at Tutti's Pizza (where I saw a green basilisk) before I caught the public boat to Cerro Tortuguero. I purchased my ticket to the hike online in advance (only cost around $2, need to book online). The "hike" only ended up being about a 20 minute walk through the forest including climbing some stairs, but the view was beautiful from the top. I saw two different types of monkeys in the treetops! There were also a lot of bugs. I killed some time before the boat arrived by exploring the other paths at the bottom of Cerro Tortuguero.
I caught public boat back (3000 CRC round trip purchased at the dock in Tortuguero) and got lunch at El Patio, which had tables on a dock right on the canal. The food was pretty good and priced alright.
My last activity of the trip was the guided night tour. We met at the hostel and walked through the outskirts of the village and into the forest, sewing wolf spiders, grasshoppers, a sloth, birds, and a baby snake.
Aracari Garden Hostel: Pros-good place to socialize, good prices, breakfast included, easy walk to everything downtown, nice courtyard, quiet area, 24/7 reception Cons-sheets were thin with a hole, only one bathroom for 10 people (though there were a couple toilets downstairs), unlimited Shuttle wasn't really worth it (Ubers are pretty cheap and it had very limited times, plus the driver was grumpy).
DAY 6:
Stopped at the grocery store on the north end of Tortuguero for snacks and electrolites and then got some pastries from Dorling Bakery (the pastries were cheap, but dry). I enjoyed my breakfast on the beach at the Carribean Sea and put my feet in the warm water.
I used Caribe Shuttle to arrange transportation back to San Jose. I had the bus drop me off at the Marriott Hacienda Belen since my flight wasn't until very late and I had about 6 hours to kill. I ate some (expensive) food at the cafe at the Marriott (supposedly open 24/7) and then hungout in the large, beautiful lobby until it was time to Uber to the airport.
I got to the airport with lots of time to spare and security was an absolute breeze.
Unfortunately, an hour or so before my flight was supposed to leave I got a message that the flight was canceled. Soon enough, everyone got a notification that the flight was off and there was lots of confusion and frustration as the gate board still showed the flight as on time, plus there was no gate agent or employee to talk to. Alaska sent out an email saying they rebooked me on the soonest available flight, but it wasn't until more than 24 hours later. I ended up finding the soonest available flight on another airline (about 9 hours later) and canceled my other flight. Eventually a gate agent showed up (as well as the pilots), and people starting lining up to figure out what was going on and get on a sooner flight. In short, I ended up spending about 9 hours total at the airport and was not happy with Alaska Airlines. Fortunately, I made it home safely, just 7 hours after I was originally going to.
submitted by Novel-Art3412 to CostaRicaTravel [link] [comments]
A few things I wish I knew before my trip: you need to drink tons of water and electrolytes everyday since it's so hot and humid, you will get bug bites no matter what you do so bring anti itch cream, having a small towel to dry your hands is helpful since a lot of bathrooms don't have hand towels or dryer, people are very appreciative of you knowing a small amount of Spanish.
Here's my trip report:
DAY 0:
I flew into San Jose in the evening and stayed at Stray Cat Hostel (arranged transportation through the hostel).
Stray Cat Hostel: Pros- very clean, cats, employees were very nice Cons- hostel was overbooked (given option of bed in mixed dormitority or room in hotel across the streer), limited bathrooms, lack of shelves in bathrooms/showers.
DAY 1:
I had a breakfast of eggs, beans, and rice at Stray Cat Hostel and walked 10 minutes to bus stop for Transmonteverde public bus (booked online in advance). The neighborhood was pretty quiet, mainly residential and I felt safe, though I was alert and had directions in one ear bud and the other ear bud out so I could hear around me.
At the bus station there was a long line of people waiting, but i wasn't sure for what bus. I asked the employee at the bus station for where the bus to Transmontevde is and he directed me through the turnstiles and down to the bus.
The bus seats had little leg room and not much room for you to have your bag with you unless you had an empty seat next to you. We stopped 2.5 hours into the bus ride at Restaurante Vista Al Mar, which had bathrooms (free), some food, and cold drinks. This was about a 20 minute break. The road became very twisty in the last hour to Santa Elena.
The bus stopped at on the hill in Santa Elena, a short walk to the main town area. I got lunch at the Orchid Cafe, which was pricey, but had a nice setting and large servings.
There is a bank right by Orchid Cafe, as well as an ATM across the street from the tourist info center. I found that there's a great bakery called Panaderia el hornito de pilo, right across the street from the bus station that has inexpensive and yummy pastries (approx. 800 CRC each).
Booked the shuttle to Monteverde Cloud Forest through my hostel, OutBox Inn. Hiked the recommended trail loop, which included a suspension bridge (easy hike and well signed) and saw quetzal and coati very close. I had dinner at Taco Taco, which was pricey but had good food and nice energetic atmosphere.
OutBox Inn: Pros- very clean, perfect location to access everything, lovely patio with forest view, nice common area Cons- cockroach on toilet seat (screen in window doesn't close all the way)
DAY 2:
I had a leftover pastry from the bakery the day before for breakfast and was picked up for ziplining by Treetopia (over $100). There were 7 ziplines and I chose the company because they're the only one that has automatic braking. It felt very safe and was so much fun after I got over the nerves on the first two. Most of the employees seemed to speak English. There was a tandem zipline at the end that you need two people for. If you're solo like me you'll need to pair up with another person. There is an expensive gift shop and restaurant once you finish ziplining (plus you can pay $25 for your photos and videos).
For lunch I got a sandwich from a Cafe and ate it on the OutBox patio, then got picked up for Don Juan cacao, Sugarcane, and coffee tour. The guide had a great sense of humor and it was an interactive tour. Got dinner afterwards at Tico y Rico, which was around $19 for a vegetarian casado and soursop smoothie (large portions and friendly employees who asked if I have any allergies).
DAY 3:
Got pastries again from the same bakery before getting picked up by Caribe shuttle to go to La Fortuna. 45 minutes into the drive we stopped at an expensive store and restaurant for a short break, then drove another 45 minutes to Lake Arenal to catch a boat ride (45 minutes) and then another 30 minutes via shuttle to downtown La Fortuna. It was really nice to have a backpack instead of having to carry or drag a suitcase across the sand to board the boat across Lake Arenal (which I saw many people struggle with).
I checked into Hotel La Choza Inn and booked the unlimited Shuttle at the front desk ($20). There is a bank just by the park in La Fortuna, which was helpful since the hostel only took cash.
Lunch was at Soda Hormiga, which had gotten recommended, but while the food was pretty good and reasonably priced (about $6.5 for rice, beans, and plantains plus juice), I found that the employees weren't very friendly.
In the afternoon I took the unlimited Shuttle to Lago Parque Ecologico Volcan Arenal, where I hiked for a couple hours (which ended up being a mistake since it was so hot out). The park was beautiful and not crowded at all, I only saw a handful of tourists the whole time (plus a large group of schoolchildren).
I ended up deciding to go to Clinica Benitas since I wasn't feeling great and it has good reviews (plus was right by downtown). The doctors and staff were wonderful and made me feel as comfortable as possible. They were able to diagnosis and prescribe medication to help me feel better. I ended up costing about $400 for everything (including labwork) and then another $40 for medications at the pharmacy.
I had dinner at Spec-taco-lar, which was pretty good and had nice people watching.
La Choza Inn: Pros- inexpensive, easy to meet people, free breakfast, nice courtyard area, 24/7 reception and locked gate at night, easy to walk to everything in La Fortuna, air conditioning Cons- thin sheets with small hole, only one bathroom for 10 people (although there's a couple toilets downstairs by the courtyard), shuttle driver wasn't very friendly, open window in shower that allows bugs to get in.
DAY 4:
I had breakfast at La Choza Inn (eggs, beans and rice, juice, banana, toast) and had a relaxing morning. I got lunch from Chipotle's, where the sweetest woman works. She was so helpful and told me to ask her if I have any questions at all.
I then scheduled a wildlife tour walk through La Fortuna Hikes and Trails, which was a 15 minute walk from downtown. Sergio was an amazing guide and was so knowledge about all the wildlife. We saw sloths, bats, blue jean posion dart frogs, a Fer du Lance snake, a lizard, and a turkey like bird. The walk was only $32 for nearly 3 hours! We ended the tour with sugar cane juice and tortilla making with two abuelas, who then gave us tacos, dessert, and juice (all part of the price!).
I didn't have enough time to go to the waterfall, so I decided to go to Relax Termalitas hot springs instead ($18 plus a couple dollars for locker renral) which was like a casual resort with many different pools of different temperatures. I took an Uber there and back and it was pretty easy and cheap. I ended the day at Open Kitchen, which was expensive, but had huge portions.
DAY 5:
I took a shuttle (booked through Caribe) from La Choza Inn at 5:30 AM to get to Tortuguero. We stopped about 2 hours in for the included breakfast, then had another 1.5 hours or so on the shuttle and then took a 45 minute boat to Tortuguero. We saw a crocodile and river otter in the canals.
I checked into Aracari Garden Hostel and booked a night walk ($30) at the front desk. Lunch was at Tutti's Pizza (where I saw a green basilisk) before I caught the public boat to Cerro Tortuguero. I purchased my ticket to the hike online in advance (only cost around $2, need to book online). The "hike" only ended up being about a 20 minute walk through the forest including climbing some stairs, but the view was beautiful from the top. I saw two different types of monkeys in the treetops! There were also a lot of bugs. I killed some time before the boat arrived by exploring the other paths at the bottom of Cerro Tortuguero.
I caught public boat back (3000 CRC round trip purchased at the dock in Tortuguero) and got lunch at El Patio, which had tables on a dock right on the canal. The food was pretty good and priced alright.
My last activity of the trip was the guided night tour. We met at the hostel and walked through the outskirts of the village and into the forest, sewing wolf spiders, grasshoppers, a sloth, birds, and a baby snake.
Aracari Garden Hostel: Pros-good place to socialize, good prices, breakfast included, easy walk to everything downtown, nice courtyard, quiet area, 24/7 reception Cons-sheets were thin with a hole, only one bathroom for 10 people (though there were a couple toilets downstairs), unlimited Shuttle wasn't really worth it (Ubers are pretty cheap and it had very limited times, plus the driver was grumpy).
DAY 6:
Stopped at the grocery store on the north end of Tortuguero for snacks and electrolites and then got some pastries from Dorling Bakery (the pastries were cheap, but dry). I enjoyed my breakfast on the beach at the Carribean Sea and put my feet in the warm water.
I used Caribe Shuttle to arrange transportation back to San Jose. I had the bus drop me off at the Marriott Hacienda Belen since my flight wasn't until very late and I had about 6 hours to kill. I ate some (expensive) food at the cafe at the Marriott (supposedly open 24/7) and then hungout in the large, beautiful lobby until it was time to Uber to the airport.
I got to the airport with lots of time to spare and security was an absolute breeze.
Unfortunately, an hour or so before my flight was supposed to leave I got a message that the flight was canceled. Soon enough, everyone got a notification that the flight was off and there was lots of confusion and frustration as the gate board still showed the flight as on time, plus there was no gate agent or employee to talk to. Alaska sent out an email saying they rebooked me on the soonest available flight, but it wasn't until more than 24 hours later. I ended up finding the soonest available flight on another airline (about 9 hours later) and canceled my other flight. Eventually a gate agent showed up (as well as the pilots), and people starting lining up to figure out what was going on and get on a sooner flight. In short, I ended up spending about 9 hours total at the airport and was not happy with Alaska Airlines. Fortunately, I made it home safely, just 7 hours after I was originally going to.
2024.05.13 02:56 NatalieMaybeIDK Stuck on Mars
Woops your two way Mars trip ended up getting you stranded in a habitation pod. They paid you $250,000 USD to stay here a month, but it turns out due to some atmospheric conditions and the company going under that you are stuck here for good. Without pay. Turns out getting a human out of here will kill them for some reason. They give you some science mumbo jumbo.
Fear not. Even though rescue is impossible a group from Earth has funded to send you some equipment and supplies. You'll be sent monthly rations and toiletries via a shuttle that auto-docks with your habitation pod. This also transfers you water.
Your habitat contains a 15x15ft bedroom, a 10x10 "kitchen" microwave/cupboards/dishwashesink, and a 5x5 bathroom with shower. Small extra area for 2x sets of extra clothes and washedryer.
The first ship they send has a lot higher of a budget. They've sent a list of what they could send you. First to prevent madness they'll send you 3 more pods. You can choose each option as many times as you want for double space/ any duplicate equipment in the pod, or just a separate identical dome.
Choose Three
Each month you'll be given a $250 budget to spend on anything you want adjusted for inflation. Any companion gets their own budget.
You'll get occasional bonuses if you survive.
5 years: +1 dome 10 years: +1 dome +$50 15 years: you'll be sent a serum to de-age you at the rate of 1 year per year until you hit 20. At which point you'll age normally again. It also heals you of all disorders. Any companions get this. These only seem to work for everyone 5 times ever. Probably should save it until you're old. 20 years: +$50 a month. 25 years: +1 dome 30 Years: +$100 a month 40 years: +1 dome 50 years: a new space colony will begin construction right next door. You'll be hooked up to another pod of 6 various workers. They have their own bedrooms, biodome, 2x rec room. You are able to close off contact with them if you'd like or interact freely. They have their only monthly budgets and work 5 hours 5 days a week. Mostly repairing drones and monitoring progress of construction.
60 years: The first permant Martian city. This city will quickly hold 250 colonists and they have the capability to expand overtime. You and companions will be considered celebrities. While the city has a large open public space, you and your companions will have the largest private area. Most living in small apartments.
submitted by NatalieMaybeIDK to 6Perks [link] [comments]
Fear not. Even though rescue is impossible a group from Earth has funded to send you some equipment and supplies. You'll be sent monthly rations and toiletries via a shuttle that auto-docks with your habitation pod. This also transfers you water.
Your habitat contains a 15x15ft bedroom, a 10x10 "kitchen" microwave/cupboards/dishwashesink, and a 5x5 bathroom with shower. Small extra area for 2x sets of extra clothes and washedryer.
The first ship they send has a lot higher of a budget. They've sent a list of what they could send you. First to prevent madness they'll send you 3 more pods. You can choose each option as many times as you want for double space/ any duplicate equipment in the pod, or just a separate identical dome.
Choose Three
- Biodome: This 50x50ft dome has a clear yet perfectly safe dome letting you see out. There is a genetically engineered apple tree that blooms and produces apples year round at an accelerated rate. Each branch oddly produces at staggered rates. You'll end up with a single branch's apples reaching maturity each week 4-8 seedless apples. About 1 in 10000 apples have a single seed. If you look closely maybe you can plant another. There are also few bushes and some grass. There is artificial UV lighting in here. You could plant other seeds.
- Entertainment dome: 15x15ft. This comes with a comfy sofa, TV with 5terabyte of current Earth media. They'll let you pick and send similar things or as you request. You are provided a desk with a gaming PC. This connects to the TV and two monitors on the desk. This comes with any standard gaming peripherals and a comfy chair. You can download things from the internet, but even browsing is incredibly slow. We are talking 1minute latency on good days. Works for downloading, but not multiplayer games or real time conversations. We'll open a portal for you yo legally download anything. Well anything not disgusting you perv.
- Bedroom: This pod is identical to yours. Small kitchen and bathroom included. One other participant has agreed to accompany you. You'll fill out a series of psychological tests, and we'll send you someone that isn't likely to drive you more insane. As we are focused on survival, you'll get no choice in the matter.
- Kitchen pod: A much larger kitchen space. 20x20 space with all standard appliances. We'll send you the standard food rations and allow you to pick $200 in ingredients every months. This $200 must be kitchen/food related.
- Library: A 20x20ft room. This holds two eReaders connected to a database of all known written works. It also includes three high quality bean bag chairs, a cozy reading chair, and a couch. If you'd like they'll send you 1-4 large shelves with any books you'd like that can fit on it. With the eReaders this would mostly be aesthetics. Maybe you like books?
- Pool Room: 25x25 ft room with a 15x15 ft pool and a 5x5 ft hot tub. Plenty of extra towels and some pool toys.
- Rec room: 20x20 ft room. Contains a pool table, darts, a poker table, two sets of playing cards, and mini-fridge stocked with 48 cans of soft drink a month.
- Hobby room: 20x20 ft empty room. Onetime you'll get $1200 to furnish this room as desired or buy tools. You'll then be given $100 a month to spend on hobby equipment.
- Expansion: all rooms gain 25% more space.
- $250 a month
Each month you'll be given a $250 budget to spend on anything you want adjusted for inflation. Any companion gets their own budget.
You'll get occasional bonuses if you survive.
5 years: +1 dome 10 years: +1 dome +$50 15 years: you'll be sent a serum to de-age you at the rate of 1 year per year until you hit 20. At which point you'll age normally again. It also heals you of all disorders. Any companions get this. These only seem to work for everyone 5 times ever. Probably should save it until you're old. 20 years: +$50 a month. 25 years: +1 dome 30 Years: +$100 a month 40 years: +1 dome 50 years: a new space colony will begin construction right next door. You'll be hooked up to another pod of 6 various workers. They have their own bedrooms, biodome, 2x rec room. You are able to close off contact with them if you'd like or interact freely. They have their only monthly budgets and work 5 hours 5 days a week. Mostly repairing drones and monitoring progress of construction.
60 years: The first permant Martian city. This city will quickly hold 250 colonists and they have the capability to expand overtime. You and companions will be considered celebrities. While the city has a large open public space, you and your companions will have the largest private area. Most living in small apartments.
2024.05.12 22:33 eslmomma Where do I start? CC okay
 | 48 yoa South American submitted by eslmomma to MakeupLounge [link] [comments] Wearing two products, here (problem areas listed below product list): 1) Stila liquid lip - Wayyy too matte and dry, unfortunately. Tested with burrito-eating and it did not hold up. No priming, no liner. 2) Two Faced 36 hour eyeliner - Tested this product today … I even tightlined this morning but it smudged all over my eyes. No primer, no baking… this won’t be my HG any time soon. Problem areas: 1) Brows - The last time I got them threaded, I RAN out of the brow bar. I think the girl was new and I should have gone to my regular lady. I can’t decide on how to line and fill my brows since one has a sharp and angled arch and one is more round. I also feel clownish when I go too dark. I didn’t have this much sparseness in my 30’s. 2) Color - I am apricot colored everywhere but my nose. It’s wild to me. I look more orange when I have no make up on. I’m not pink or brown, I’m not olive or fair. What am I supposed to do when it comes to matching, and why do I only ever get matched as “LIGHT?” Do I look for cools, warms, or neutrals? 3) Upper lip scadiscoloration: After a threading session, I ended up with a horizontally shaped bruise over my upper lip. It stands out to me because it looks like facial hair, but it’s a blackish grey mark that has been there for a year and left me with nerve damage as it always feels cold and wet. No amount of powder or foundation can help me unsee it. 4) Contour, conceal, and highlight - When I wear make up, I go hard with concealer and loose powder under my eyes and on my nose. The look is very flat and when I try to bring in color, I don’t know which product and colors to try, and I have no technique. It makes me never want to attempt base and color on my face, but I’m also not completely happy looking so orange all the time and I need at least some SPF on my face to keep from getting more spots. Now in the market for something a bit minimalist as far as base is concerned. 5) Dark spots on forehead. It would be really great if my forehead tanned evenly, but it absolutely doesn’t. I can wear SPF and a hat and stay under an umbrella and I end up still getting major uneven color on my forehead, which is not even the same color as the rest of me. I feel pretty helpless!!! Where do I start??? |
2024.05.12 22:14 MomentarilyThrownAwa 39 [M4F] #NC - Let's leave a mark on the world!
Do you ever look at a passionate, creative, nerdy power couple like Matt Mercer and Marisha Ray or Clare Grant and Seth Green and think, "F***, they seem like they're having so much fun together! I would like to have a relationship like that."?
Do you find that you go a little crazy if you have not expressed your creativity or learned something new in 36-48 hours, and would like to have a personal cheerleadeco-conspirator to help inspire you and join you on the adventure?
Do you feel like you're a black sheep in the world that refuses to conform to pseudo-traditional expectations and like being around others like yourself?
If you answered yes to any or all of these questions, are currently receptive to new friendships/relationships, and potentially appreciate oxford commas - then I would like to get to know you!
About me:
39M, >6', cis PUNK (Professional Urbanite, No Kids), thriving in the Triangle area. I'm a well rounded nerd with a penchant for sci-fi/fantasy books, games, TV shows, and movies. I also enjoy working with my hands and being crafty, playing/listening to music, and discovering treasures in thrift stores and flea markets. Occasionally I bake bread or a cheesecake that has elicited more than 1 marriage proposal from those that tried it. But typically I enjoy cooking a nice Japanese curry, or having a fancy cup of coffee.
I love being inspired and inspiring others. Creativity is my drug, and it has made me one of those people that wakes up early in the morning (not a mutual requirement) without an alarm because I want to make the most of the day. I also like learning new things and gradually gathering skills and knowledge that is seemingly so eccentric but it might just keep us alive in a zombie invasion.
I definitely land in the 'alt' category appearance-wise if that is a concern you may have. I have a lot of black clothing, tattoos, and wear big dumb work boots almost every day. You by no means should feel like you have to match this aesthetic in your own choices. You be you. I just know this seems to be a big factor for some people.
Other things about me that could be deal breakers for some people so might as well get them on the table: I'm a giant - tall, broad, and currently a bit overweight (but been working on it with exciting results). I started going bald when I turned 30 (thanks parents' genes!) - I'm fine with it and keep it buzzed/shaved (but even before I started losing my hair I wore hats 90% of the time anyway). I'm not attached to my phone 24/7 - I'm just not, it's not my thing. If someone texts me I'll likely get back to them in less than an hour, but I'm pretty much never staring/looking at my phone for more than 1min at a time. This seems to be an odd deal breaker for some, but... I enjoy/prefer meeting people irl - it wouldn't have to be an immediate thing, there needs to be at least some repartee to feel comfortable with the idea. But I guess what I want to put out there is that I'm not really looking for a online only forever style of relationship. I want to go on adventures together some day, so please be open to the idea of meeting irl.
If you read all this, thank you! I hope you're having a good day today. And if this post appeals to your own desires, please drop me a message. I'm looking forward to it!
submitted by MomentarilyThrownAwa to R4R30Plus [link] [comments]
Do you find that you go a little crazy if you have not expressed your creativity or learned something new in 36-48 hours, and would like to have a personal cheerleadeco-conspirator to help inspire you and join you on the adventure?
Do you feel like you're a black sheep in the world that refuses to conform to pseudo-traditional expectations and like being around others like yourself?
If you answered yes to any or all of these questions, are currently receptive to new friendships/relationships, and potentially appreciate oxford commas - then I would like to get to know you!
About me:
39M, >6', cis PUNK (Professional Urbanite, No Kids), thriving in the Triangle area. I'm a well rounded nerd with a penchant for sci-fi/fantasy books, games, TV shows, and movies. I also enjoy working with my hands and being crafty, playing/listening to music, and discovering treasures in thrift stores and flea markets. Occasionally I bake bread or a cheesecake that has elicited more than 1 marriage proposal from those that tried it. But typically I enjoy cooking a nice Japanese curry, or having a fancy cup of coffee.
I love being inspired and inspiring others. Creativity is my drug, and it has made me one of those people that wakes up early in the morning (not a mutual requirement) without an alarm because I want to make the most of the day. I also like learning new things and gradually gathering skills and knowledge that is seemingly so eccentric but it might just keep us alive in a zombie invasion.
I definitely land in the 'alt' category appearance-wise if that is a concern you may have. I have a lot of black clothing, tattoos, and wear big dumb work boots almost every day. You by no means should feel like you have to match this aesthetic in your own choices. You be you. I just know this seems to be a big factor for some people.
Other things about me that could be deal breakers for some people so might as well get them on the table: I'm a giant - tall, broad, and currently a bit overweight (but been working on it with exciting results). I started going bald when I turned 30 (thanks parents' genes!) - I'm fine with it and keep it buzzed/shaved (but even before I started losing my hair I wore hats 90% of the time anyway). I'm not attached to my phone 24/7 - I'm just not, it's not my thing. If someone texts me I'll likely get back to them in less than an hour, but I'm pretty much never staring/looking at my phone for more than 1min at a time. This seems to be an odd deal breaker for some, but... I enjoy/prefer meeting people irl - it wouldn't have to be an immediate thing, there needs to be at least some repartee to feel comfortable with the idea. But I guess what I want to put out there is that I'm not really looking for a online only forever style of relationship. I want to go on adventures together some day, so please be open to the idea of meeting irl.
If you read all this, thank you! I hope you're having a good day today. And if this post appeals to your own desires, please drop me a message. I'm looking forward to it!
2024.05.12 22:09 alohomaura Eras Tour Bracelet Lyrics: The Tortured Poets Department
 | Hello again! submitted by alohomaura to TaylorSwift [link] [comments] I made a post a few weeks back about my Eras Tour bracelets all with lyrics about the show/listening back after with the Spotify playlist code on the back & I thought I'd come back with my TTPD chosen lyrics in case anyone else was planning to do similar & didn't have time to go through all the lyrics :) ..but first, thank you all SO much for your responses on my last post. It was genuinely unexpected & I'm so happy you all liked them! [I may or may not still go back to read some any time I think they aren't good enough to give out to people..which is why it took so long to decide to do these :')] I ended up not having enough cord to finish them, though, so I attached around 40 of the not-really-the-brief-I-just-got-carried-away ones to keyrings so people can make their own if they like (I thought this might be better than burning them...but I'm still undecided if it's a bad idea or not considering they're lacking the bracelet part...?) Anyway, the lyrics for anyone interested:
|
2024.05.12 06:08 bamzing Modern Showcase Challenge #2 Results - May 11 2024
Source: https://www.mtgo.com/decklist/modern-showcase-challenge-2024-05-1112637278
Scraper by bamzing! ALL deck names are automated, please don't get too angry if the scraper mislabeled something. If your name is on there and you have a TwitteTwitch/YouTube link, I'll add it! But please tag me (u/bamzing) so I can see your request.
submitted by bamzing to ModernMagic [link] [comments]
Winner
- madd2 on BG Yawgmoth
Decklists
| 220 | Modern Showcase Challenge #2 (May 11 2024) | ||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1. | BG Yawgmoth | (10-2) madd2 | |||
| 2. | Temur Prowess [Jegantha] | (10-2) chase00111 | |||
| 3. | UW Control [Kaheera] | (8-3) nahuel10 | @Nahuel10Mtg | ||
| 4. | Jund Saga [Jegantha] | (8-3) Wiltron92 | |||
| 5. | Domain Zoo [Jegantha] | (8-2) Oppa | @LimitedOppa | ||
| 6. | UW Control [Kaheera] | (8-2) Jpsn54 | |||
| 7. | Domain Zoo [Jegantha] | (8-2) CMack_ | @CanMack1 | ||
| 8. | Mono B Coffers | (7-3) Tulio_Jaudy | @TulioJaudy | ||
| 9. | Domain Zoo [Jegantha] | (7-2) manohito | |||
| 10. | BG Yawgmoth | (7-2) ARCll | |||
| 11. | 61-cards Esper Control [Kaheera] | (7-2) Parrotlet | |||
| 12. | Mono B Coffers | (7-2) yriel | @YrielPenguin | ||
| 13. | BG Yawgmoth | (7-2) __BMJ__ | @BenJonesMTG | ||
| 14. | RG Crimes [Jegantha] | (7-2) aspiringspike | @Aspiringspike | [Twitch] | [YouTube] |
| 15. | BR Grief | (7-2) bolov0 | @bolov0 | ||
| 16. | 4c Omnath [Kaheera] | (7-2) McWinSauce | @McWinSauce | ||
| 17. | Mono B Rack | (7-2) Uegjo | |||
| 18. | 61-cards 4c Breach Station | (7-2) daibloXSC | @MarcTobiasch | [Twitch] | |
| 19. | Bant Living End | (6-3) kahluah777 | |||
| 20. | UR Murktide | (6-3) rgbandre | |||
| 21. | 4c Living End | (6-3) PintuMtg | |||
| 22. | BG Yawgmoth | (6-3) lunaloveee | |||
| 23. | Hardened Scales | (6-3) xGSx | |||
| 24. | 80-cards 5c Omnath | (6-3) Tunaktunak | @Jair_Farjat | ||
| 25. | Jund Saga [Jegantha] | (6-3) crzmvx | |||
| 26. | Temur Prowess [Jegantha] | (6-3) jben | |||
| 27. | 4c Goryo's Vengeance | (6-3) 2radMTG | |||
| 28. | GW Martyr | (6-3) Magician15 | @Corey_Burkhart | ||
| 29. | Esper Control [Kaheera] | (6-3) Viatt | |||
| 30. | 61-cards 4c Control [Kaheera] | (6-3) Andrea94 | |||
| 31. | Bant Emeria Control | (6-3) qUaBaTcHiEs | |||
| 32. | BG Yawgmoth | (6-3) pepeteam | |||
| 33. | BR Grief | (6-3) Schiaveto | @Schiaveto_ | ||
| 34. | 4c Goryo's Vengeance | (6-3) Aardos | @BigBossAardos | ||
| 35. | 61-cards Amulet Titan | (6-3) Nandisko | |||
| 36. | UW Hammer | (6-3) Roberto777 | |||
| 37. | 4c Omnath | (6-3) Qua4tre | |||
| 38. | Domain Zoo [Jegantha] | (6-3) Kotte89 | |||
| 39. | BG Yawgmoth | (6-3) Misplacedginger | @misplacedginger | [Twitch] | |
| 40. | Mono B Rack | (6-3) Selfeisek | |||
| 41. | BG Yawgmoth | (6-3) gm_95 | |||
| 42. | BR Grief | (6-3) Bugsy69 | @BugsyOP | ||
| 43. | RG Prowess [Jegantha] | (6-3) avb | |||
| 44. | RG Prowess [Jegantha] | (6-3) MdvWin | |||
| 45. | Jund Goryo's Vengeance | (6-3) Smigui | |||
| 46. | Amulet Titan | (6-3) 532at | |||
| 47. | 61-cards Amulet Titan | (5-4) mcwright_ | @mcwright_ | ||
| 48. | Temur Prowess [Jegantha] | (5-4) super_squirrel | |||
| 49. | BR Grief | (5-4) Arianne | |||
| 50. | Calibrated Blast | (5-4) Zeekery | |||
| 51. | Temur Prowess [Jegantha] | (5-4) Ti0Patinhas | |||
| 52. | BG Yawgmoth | (5-4) Edraros3 | @Edraros3 | ||
| 53. | BG Yawgmoth | (5-4) teyi | |||
| 54. | Hardened Scales | (5-4) Chichichi | |||
| 55. | Jeskai Control [Kaheera] | (5-4) bless_von | |||
| 56. | Domain Murktide | (5-4) pickled6 | |||
| 57. | Mono B Coffers | (5-4) CanadianNinja | |||
| 58. | Temur Prowess [Jegantha] | (5-4) Edel | @edelgenius | ||
| 59. | Jund Creativity | (5-4) Sanchito | |||
| 60. | Jund Saga [Jegantha] | (5-4) LFC | |||
| 61. | Domain Zoo [Jegantha] | (5-4) Foxantes | @Foxantes | ||
| 62. | Hardened Scales | (5-4) grinderA | |||
| 63. | UB Mill | (5-4) ganjadejanga | @ganjadejanga | ||
| 64. | BR Grief | (5-4) simoneromarm | |||
| 65. | Domain Zoo [Jegantha] | (5-4) ElfKid | |||
| 66. | 4c Omnath | (5-4) Spezzagatti23 | |||
| 67. | Temur Prowess [Jegantha] | (5-4) benjamin13 | |||
| 68. | Domain Zoo [Jegantha] | (5-4) kasa | @kasatsuba | ||
| 69. | UR Murktide | (5-4) O_danielakos | |||
| 70. | 4c Control [Kaheera] | (5-4) d_peliser | |||
| 71. | Bant Living End | (5-4) grantantalus | |||
| 72. | Mono B Rack | (4-2) Tubaba | |||
| 73. | Mono B Rack | (4-4) duke12 | |||
| 74. | Jund Grief | (4-3) mark_68 | |||
| 75. | BG Yawgmoth | (4-4) scipios | @SCIPIOS1 | [Twitch] | [YouTube] |
| 76. | Domain Rhinos | (4-5) Durrrr89 | |||
| 77. | Domain Zoo [Jegantha] | (4-5) Folpip | |||
| 78. | Amulet Titan | (4-5) Melicard | @SznajderJakub | ||
| 79. | Bant Living End | (4-2) thestudygroup | |||
| 80. | BG Yawgmoth | (4-5) SimoCr | |||
| 81. | Domain Zoo [Jegantha] | (4-5) talonflame23185 | |||
| 82. | 5c Omnath [Kaheera] | (4-4) Okayasu | |||
| 83. | BR Grief | (4-5) rastaf | @MtgRastaf | [Twitch] | |
| 84. | 61-cards Mono G Tron | (4-5) SuperCow12653 | |||
| 85. | 4c Living End | (4-5) Gabanaci | |||
| 86. | Domain Zoo [Jegantha] | (4-5) nabenabetk | |||
| 87. | 4c Living End | (4-4) _goblinlackey | |||
| 88. | Affinity | (3-5) domingosfh | |||
| 89. | RG Burn | (4-5) DemianDesposito10 | |||
| 90. | RG Prowess [Jegantha] | (4-4) Janisss | |||
| 91. | Domain Zoo [Jegantha] | (4-5) rasvd | |||
| 92. | Mono G Tron | (4-5) ice_nine_BIGFAN | |||
| 93. | BR Grief | (4-5) Poderosisimo | |||
| 94. | Domain Zoo [Jegantha] | (4-5) AlejandroAArenas | |||
| 95. | Jund Valakut | (3-3) stefanocanclini | |||
| 96. | Jund Creativity | (3-3) SPyromancer | |||
| 97. | BG Yawgmoth | (3-4) Rapsidian | |||
| 98. | Domain Rhinos | (3-6) chuyingfei | |||
| 99. | 4c Goryo's Vengeance | (3-4) Rvng | @Rvng_mtg | ||
| 100. | BG Yawgmoth | (3-2) Shade_Scorpion | |||
| 101. | UW Mill | (3-3) Jugador1 | |||
| 102. | BR Grief | (3-6) Alpha_Go | |||
| 103. | 4c Living End | (3-5) LucasG1ggs | @GiggsMtg | ||
| 104. | BR Grief | (3-6) MAFS | |||
| 105. | Mono G Tron | (3-6) CannabisBoy | |||
| 106. | BR Grief | (3-5) _Shatun_ | |||
| 107. | Amulet Titan | (3-3) gurig | @TaintedOpt | ||
| 108. | Domain Zoo [Jegantha] | (3-3) tabananga | |||
| 109. | UB Control | (3-4) PhantasmalBear | |||
| 110. | Amulet Titan | (3-4) hgcavagnoli | |||
| 111. | 4c Living End | (3-6) BeoulveHeart | |||
| 112. | Jund Creativity | (3-4) Galathehutt | |||
| 113. | Esper Control [Kaheera] | (3-2) MentalMisstep | @KingofTraitors | ||
| 114. | RW Convoke [Jegantha] | (2-6) canepis16 | |||
| 115. | BR Grief | (3-6) Zoob5555 | |||
| 116. | 4c Living End | (3-6) drVendigo | |||
| 117. | 61-cards Amulet Titan | (3-4) AnothaPlaya | |||
| 118. | Mono B Coffers | (2-2) __Noob__ | |||
| 119. | RG Prowess [Jegantha] | (2-2) NaentarK | |||
| 120. | RW Convoke [Jegantha] | (2-3) mashmalovsky | @mashmalovsky | ||
| 121. | BG Yawgmoth | (2-2) mei0024 | @mei00241 | ||
| 122. | Jund Creativity | (2-2) Moopatroopa7 | |||
| 123. | Temur Prowess [Jegantha] | (2-2) 416FrowningTable | @FrowningTable | ||
| 124. | BG Yawgmoth | (2-4) peter780108 | |||
| 125. | Domain Zoo [Jegantha] | (2-2) Gerschi | @IGerschenson | ||
| 126. | Sultai Shadow | (2-4) ale_ax95 | |||
| 127. | BG Yawgmoth | (2-3) BotaNivea | |||
| 128. | 61-cards BG Yawgmoth | (2-2) claudioh | @claudiohmtg | [Twitch] | |
| 129. | Esper Control [Kaheera] | (2-2) TSPJendrek | @TSPJendrek | [Twitch] | [YouTube] |
| 130. | Amulet Titan | (2-2) Bob49 | @Bob449449 | ||
| 131. | Bant Living End | (2-2) 336767332971 | |||
| 132. | Mono B Coffers | (2-4) Scherben | |||
| 133. | BG Yawgmoth | (2-3) TerminalJustice | |||
| 134. | BG Yawgmoth | (2-3) adebevoise | @DebevoiseDrew | [Twitch] | [YouTube] |
| 135. | Esper Control [Kaheera] | (2-2) slaxx | |||
| 136. | 4c Goryo's Vengeance | (2-6) Ivan_Draw_Go | @Ivan_Draw_Go | [Twitch] | |
| 137. | 4c Omnath | (2-2) TrueHero | @IsThatTrueHero | ||
| 138. | UB Mill | (2-4) tibalt_of_red_sub | @TibaltOfRedSub | ||
| 139. | BG Yawgmoth | (2-2) Graciasportanto | @MauroSasso2 | ||
| 140. | BG Yawgmoth | (2-4) Mogg_Flunkies | |||
| 141. | UR Control | (2-4) mikeleee | |||
| 142. | 4c Living End | (2-2) MeninoNey | @MeninooNey |
Full Metagame Breakdown
28 Bx Grief (26 BR, 1 Jund, 1 4c) 25 BG Yawgmoth 18 Domain Zoo 17 Amulet Titan 15 Living End (10 4c, 5 Bant) 14 Rx Prowess (9 Temur, 5 RG) 11 UWx Control (5 Esper, 2 UW, 2 4c, 1 Jeskai, 1 Bant) 11 Omnath (8 4c, 3 5c) 10 Bx Goryo's Vengeance (9 4c, 1 Jund) 10 Creativity (7 Jund, 3 5c) 7 Mono B Coffers 4 Jund Saga 4 Mono B Rack 4 Ux Mill (3 UB, 1 UW) 4 Mono G Tron 4 RW Convoke 3 UR Murktide 3 Hardened Scales 3 Wx Hammer (1 UW, 1 Bant, 1 GW) 2 4c Breach Station 2 Emeria Control (1 Bant, 1 GW) 2 Domain Murktide 2 Domain Rhinos 2 Rx Burn (1 RG, 1 RW) 2 UBx Shadow (1 Sultai, 1 Grixis) 1 RG Crimes 1 GW Martyr 1 Calibrated Blast 1 Affinity 1 Jund Valakut 1 UB Control 1 UR Control 1 Grixis Midrange 1 Jund Assault Loam 1 Temur Breach 1 Mono R Midrange 1 Grixis Marauder Living End 1 Esper Soulherder
X-2 or better Archetype Breakdown
3 BG Yawgmoth 3 Domain Zoo 3 UWx Control (2 UW, 1 Esper) 2 Mono B Coffers 1 Bx Grief (1 BR) 1 Rx Prowess (1 Temur) 1 Omnath (1 4c) 1 Jund Saga 1 Mono B Rack 1 4c Breach Station 1 RG Crimes
New Cards (OTJ/BIG)
Slickshot Show-Off Kaervek, the Punisher Insatiable Avarice Honest Rutstein Magda, the Hoardmaster Freestrider Lookout Caustic Bronco Spinewoods Armadillo Lavaspur Boots Three Steps Ahead Roxanne, Starfall Savant Bristling Backwoods Jagged Barrens Pillage the Bog Gisa, the Hellraiser Lively Dirge Assimilation Aegis Requisition Raid Geralf, the Fleshwright Satoru, the Infiltrator Pest Control Ancient Cornucopia Simulacrum Synthesizer Fomori Vault
Tournament Highlights
- Like a Yawgmoth to a flame! The winner is madd2 on BG Yawgmoth!
- chase00111 is our runner-up and played Temur Prowess with Jegantha!
- nahuel10 was on UW Control with Kaheera.
- Wiltron92 was on Jund Saga with Jegantha.
- Oppa was on Domain Zoo with Jegantha.
- Jpsn54 was on UW Control with Kaheera.
- CMack_ was on Domain Zoo with Jegantha.
- Tulio_Jaudy rounds out our T8 with Mono B Coffers!
- Congrats to madd2 for taking the tournament down!
Follow me on Twitter!
2024.05.12 05:45 Gemman_Aster Atomic Shop items you can request through Bethesda Support
As always I shall try to keep this list updated at least once every four weeks until the post is again automatically locked after six months, preventing further edits.
In order to request any of these items you must go to the appropriate link for the Xbox Series X/S, Windows, PS5 or Steam. If you are playing on an older system it is simple to reach its page from one of these direct links. I am sure it goes without saying your player account must have sufficient Atoms available to pay for the item/s you choose. As part of the process Bethesda Support will respond to your request by ticket and email with the total cost of whatever you order.
This page from the Wikia entry for Fallout76 may help with working out some of the bundles' contents. I cannot swear for the accuracy of the data however as with all wikis it is community-created support material.
This list is up-to-date as of 12.05.2024:
submitted by Gemman_Aster to fo76 [link] [comments]
In order to request any of these items you must go to the appropriate link for the Xbox Series X/S, Windows, PS5 or Steam. If you are playing on an older system it is simple to reach its page from one of these direct links. I am sure it goes without saying your player account must have sufficient Atoms available to pay for the item/s you choose. As part of the process Bethesda Support will respond to your request by ticket and email with the total cost of whatever you order.
This page from the Wikia entry for Fallout76 may help with working out some of the bundles' contents. I cannot swear for the accuracy of the data however as with all wikis it is community-created support material.
This list is up-to-date as of 12.05.2024:
- Ace Full Assault Power Armor Paint
- Alien Plushie
- Alien Technology Bundle
- Aluminum Trees
- Amateur Inventor's Laser Gun Paint
- American Flag Set
- Angry Fist Shake
- Animatronic Cat
- Appalachian Thunder Pipe Gatling Gun Paint
- Armored Raider Skull Gas Mask
- Armory Weapon Paint Bundle
- Army Issue Plasma Caster Paint
- Astroturf
- Atomic Blast Lamp
- Barbed Chained Tire Set
- Beer Barrel Fridge
- Big Game Hunter
- Big Red Button Icon
- Black Bear Mascot
- Black Cat Bundle
- Black Knight Paint
- Black Pip-Boy Paint
- Black Rider Power Armor
- Blood Eagle Bow Skin
- Blood Eagle Bundle
- Blood Eagle Power Armor Paint
- Blood Eagle Totem
- Bloody Arktos Refrigerator
- Bombs Away Mobile
- Bone and Felt Antler Headband Set
- Bone Gas Mask
- Bonnet
- BOS Backpack
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2024.05.12 00:55 ThrowawayforDobre A very stressful wedding.
This took place back in the 90’s, I was part of the wedding party of a good friend, having the role of an usher for the groom’s side. I was in my mid 20’s and had been very good friends with the groom since we met at sixth form college aged 16.
The Groom was from a small town of just over 3,000 people, in a very rural area in the south of England, the kind of place where everyone knows each other, and it is rare for them to mix with any outsiders. He had been a hard partying wild man, whose main interests were Football, music, and beer. When I was away at university, he saw the light, put his old ways behind him and became born again. Gave up his job and became a missionary. Whilst away doing missionary work, joined by the youngest son of his Baptist minister, the groom met the bride. I nice young girl from the north of England who was also very religious.
After six months of dating, they got engaged, he had moved up to be close to her, got a job and they got a house, although she stayed living with her parents until the wedding.
The stag do was uneventful, the Groom came back down for a weekend for it, and the best man follow the instructions he had been given. A round of golf, the out for a meal then to the Grooms old local pub for the evening. The best man and me where the only ones who where not religious, when I noticed that the where 13 of us for the meal my last supper joke did not go down well. Even the Grooms mother joined us in the pub after the meal. Not the wild night of decadence I would have through his stag do would have been only a few years before.
That’s the boring bit over, now to the Wedding…….
The day before the Wedding my job was to pick up the youngest son of the local Baptist minister first thing in the morning, he was the other usher on the groom’s side, and drive him the length of England to the North of England near the Scottish boarder. The groom had been stressing out as we are both nice easy-going blokes, but we do both have a well and truly earned reputation for being a bit flaky. I’m due to pick him up at 9am, I wake up at 9:40am. Panic, get showered and dressed and run to my car. I get five minutes down the road and then turn around and return to my home to get my wedding suit. I get to the Baptist ministers’ home at 10:40am, I am knocking and ringing the doorbell until I wake the other usher at 11am. He showers and gets dressed whilst I wait in the kitchen for him, his father the minister comes home and me and him chat, he says that he would have loved to have gone to the wedding, but unfortunately, he is performing a wedding ceremony the next day for another couple we all know. Other usher comes down and says that he will make sandwiches for the journey, so we don’t have to stop. We finally get on the road at mid-day three hours late. We drive past my home soon after and I realise that I could have picked up my suit on the way.
The journey was uneventful apart from multiple texts from the best man asking when we would arrive, as the groom has an important job for us to do when we get there. Me and other usher had known each other for years and get on well so we chat and have a good laugh, this is when I found out the news that the wedding his father is doing the next day for the lad and his girlfriend, we all know, it had the same guest list as the groom’s side of the wedding we are going to. The guests had the choice of going to a wedding that most of them could walk to, and the rest would have a five-to-ten-minute drive, or one which would need them to take a day off work and a whole weekend to go to. The groom’s side for this wedding was just, his family, us two ushers, and five people the bride and groom had been missionaries with. When we start to get hungry the other usher looks for the sandwiches he made, only to discover that he has left them on the kitchen counter back at his parents’ house. This is the last time we screw up.
We get to the bride and grooms’ home at 8pm, as we walk to the door it swings open and we are nearly knocked over as the mother of the groom, his two twin sisters, and two brothers storm out of the house. The best man then greets us with the hunted look of a Vietnam veteran with a 1,000-yard stare. The other usher asks where the other missionaries are, the best man says that they are upstairs and other usher quickly disappears to see them. I walk in, the groom is hugging the bride, I say hello, they do not acknowledge me. The best man hands me a cup of tea and we go to the living room and close the door. We can hear the bride howling in tears just the other side of the door as the groom tries to claim her. Me and the best man are both British males, we know full well what to do in this kind of situation, our grand parents lived through the blitz, we drew down into our guts and invoked the Dunkirk spirt, we kept our stiff upper lips like any true Englishman, completely ignored the situation and made small talk about football, sipping our tea. The bride took about 45 minutes to stop crying.
After the wedding I found out , what had gone on, this was the first time the bride was meeting the grooms family, first the groom had asked his two 19 year old sisters to bring their dresses for the wedding along so he could approve them, now I do not know much about women, but one of the few things I do know this that you do not tell your sisters what they can and can not wear, as they will openly and honestly tell you what you can do with that request. Then the mother of the groom gave the couple a lucky horseshoe for there wedding, they refused to accept the gift as they are strict Christians, and the lucky horseshoe is a pagan symbol. Then the father of the groom, who was divorce for the mother of the groom decided to spring a surprise on everyone, he announced that he was bringing his new girlfriend and her toddler to the wedding. This is when the excrement well and truly hit the fan. The new girlfriend the groom also knew well, during his wild times he had known her in the biblical sense on more than one occasion. She was a very friendly and giving young women, in fact most of our friend group had known her biblically as well, some of them knew her in the biblical way two at a time. Thankfully looking at the time line unless it was a two-and-a-half-year pregnancy the toddler was not the grooms. The groom’s mother had openly called the grooms fathers new girlfriend a wh**e, which I feel is unfair, she didn’t ever charge, she was not a professional, she was just a very keen amateur. Over the next few minutes of shouting, it was made clear to the groom’s father that his girlfriend would not be invited to the wedding and there would be trouble if her brought her.
After everything had calmed down, we then drove over to the brides’ parents’ home. Where we had been given the task of blowing up ballons to decorate village hall the reception was taking place in, I was confused at why the groom was so stressed at us being on time so we could do this job. Then when no one else was about the groom gave us our real roles and responsibilities for the next day. Basically, we had the job to be his fathers’ minders during the reception, his father, was a violent, aggressive, alcoholic, and our role was to try and keep him away from other guests, try to stop him from insulting anyone, and if he starts a fight then to get in the middle of it and break it up. Now, I grew up playing Rugby, the sport which American football evolved from, except the only protection we wore was a gumshield and a cup (Known as a cricket box in the UK). I may not be the tallest but at the time I had spent a year working as a builder’s labour (construction worker for the Americans) and had the body I still think in my mind I still have, until I see myself in the mirror when I get out of the shower and realise that I currently have a body that resembles a dropped lasagne. Other usher was sporty, but stick thin, and I doubt that he had ever taken a punch in his life, I knew which of the two of us would be getting in the middle to break up any fight.
The Wedding Day……….
We had stayed in the same budget hotel chain as the groom’s family, except his father. My first responsibility of the day is to drive the mother of the groom to the wedding, along with the youngest brother and other usher. Oldest brother and twin sisters are being driven by oldest brothers’ best mate who was not invited to the wedding but came anyway.
In the morning of the wedding, I am in the hotel’s carpark decorating my car with the traditional white ribbons for wedding cars. The mother of the groom leans out of her ground floor room window and calls me over to the window. I walk over and just as I get there I see over her shoulder and freeze in shock. Both the grooms twin sisters and in the background getting ready for the wedding, one has just a towel wrapped around her, the other is only wearing a thong. They both see me, freeze, then scream and run into the room’s bathroom. I am extremely embarrassed, the groom’s mother, who is very east London just shouts at them,
‘Don’t be so stupid girls, you ain't got nothing he ain't seen before’.
We then go over what time we should leave for the wedding.
Knowing both the groom, and his father are very protective over the twins, even though it was a total accent, this incident could have landed me trouble with them both.
I am so paranoid about being late to the church that we arrive so early that the church is still locked, over the next few hours people arrive. For some strange reason they had decided to go with the traditional bride’s side sitting on one side of the isle, and grooms side sitting on the other. This led to a few issues, on the groom’s side, there were on the first pew, six members of his family, on the second pew, the five missionaries plus me and other usher, and brother of the grooms best mate. On the brides’ side, there where all her friends and family, plus every member of her parents’ church. I suggested that we just filled the empty pews on the groom’s side with guests, but the two ushers on the brides’ side, the bride’s brothers wouldn’t even consider it. Me and other usher had no-one to usher to their seats, as it had started raining, we decided to grab a couple of umbrellas and meet and greet guests as they parked and shield them from the rain. We also started to set out extra seats for the bride’s side as all the pews on that side of the church had been filled, there was over 150 on her side, even though on the groom’s side only two pews had anyone sitting in them and only 14 people.
Then the final guests arrive, they are very elderly, from the church the parents of the bride belong to, they decided to park right in front of the door to the church, I asked them if they could move, they explained that they were not going to the reception and were leaving for a holiday right after the ceremony, so they wanted to leave quickly. I pointed out that they had parked in such a way that the bride would be forced to squeeze down a foot and a half gap between their mud-covered car and a brick wall whilst it was raining to get into her own wedding. They did not see anything wrong with that. There was some back and forth between us, but finally I found a parking spot which they could easily leave early from and was out of the way, they reluctantly moved their car to that spot. Just as the car carrying the bride and her father drove into the carpark.
The ceremony went off without any drama. After the ceremony it is the photos, as each set of photos are done the people leave to go to the reception. The last set to be done are the newly married couple and the groom’s mother. We get to my car, and we realise that no-one has told us where the reception is. There is one last car with wedding guests in leaving at the same time as us, the only other car is the best man’s car, and he is taking the bride and groom. I quickly follow the car that is leaving hoping that they are going to the reception. This is the 90’s, the only two people who have mobile phones are the best man, and me, him as his work supplied him with one, and I had got one as I did not want to be talking to my, at the time recently ex-girlfriend (I broke it off with her a week before and that is why other Usher got to share my hotel room with me as I had already booked and paid for two people for two nights, I had just changed the booking to a twin room) whilst in the same room as my parents on their landline. The best man calls my phone, asking if we know where the reception is, we don’t but we are following a car that might be going there. Groom and Bride do not drive and do not know the way to the reception. Other usher has my phone, he is describing landmarks to best man who is about two minutes behind us, so he can find his way. After 20 minutes of driving thankfully the car I am following is going to the reception and two minutes after we arrive the bride and groom arrive.
We go to our assigned tables for the meal, I am sitting next to the friend of the oldest brother of the groom, opposite him is the oldest brother of the groom, directly opposite me is the only wearing a towel sister of the groom, next to her is the other twin who I saw too much of earlier that day. And next to me is the boyfriend of the maid of honour. I try to make small talk with the boyfriend of the maid of honour, but he is staring daggers at the best man, who is sitting at the head table talking to and looking, like he is really hitting it off with the maid of honour. Boyfriend of maid of honour is not happy, he is in silence for most of the meal but at some points during the meal sounds like he is growling. I later found out that best man and maid of honour both had the same job and just talked shop the whole meal, the only other person best man had to talk to as he was on the head table was youngest brother of groom who was six years old, and as she was at the end of the head table there was no-one on the other side of her, the boyfriend of maid of honour made me feel about as welcome as a ginger haired step son.
The best man speech was interesting, as he had been given strict instructions on what he could say and what he could not say. The stories about the groom stopped at the age of 12, and then jumped to when he became born again. More than half his life had to be skipped over.
Due to the father of the groom, the decision was made to have a dry wedding, apart from a glass of sparkling wine each to toast the bride and groom. Somehow towel sister of the groom managed to get a few glasses of sparkling wine and started to get very flirty with me, as she was rubbing her foot up and down my leg under the table, I moved my leg away, I looked her in the eye and gave a firm shake of the head, thankfully she got the message. The other twin sister, who is very shy and studious, couldn’t even look me in the eye due to embarrassment from the morning.
On the lighter side, the bride who had been starving herself for months before the wedding, ate so much that she burst the zip at the back of her dress, she saw the funny side of it and her mother and sisters all used safety pins to pin it back up so she could then eat some more.
It then comes time for the first dance, this wedding was on a tiny budget, this was before we could burn CD’s at home, so the groom had made a mix tape for the dances, as they were half way into the first dance, the tape player ate the tape. No more music.
Me and other usher spent the rest of the time basically standing in front of father of the groom, who had brought his own bottle of whiskey. We knew that a guaranteed why to provoke violence was to try and take the bottle off him. We became the absorbers of his bile, we bit our tongues as we listened to his racist, anti-Semitic, anti-Islamic, sexist ranting, saying about how the world is against him and none of his problems are his fault. Each time one of his children or his ex-wife came within earshot her would try to provoke them, but they remained stoic.
It then came time for the bride and groom to leave for their honeymoon, I had supplied the oldest brother of the groom and his friend with a can of shaving foam to decorate the wedding car in the traditional manner, they did not disappoint.
Once the bride and groom had left, the rest of the guest all left, no music, no booze, no food there was nothing to stay around for, so the wedding was over by 7:30pm.
I drove the mother of the groom, Youngest brother of the groom and other usher back to the budget chain hotel we were staying in. after dropping them off I went and brough myself a lot of beer, went to oldest brother of the grooms room, as the England football team had been playing a world cup qualifier game that day and had set up a video recorder to record it and we watched the game. Half way through the best man turned up, again with a 1,000 yards stare.
Later I found out what had happened next. The best man had driven the newly married couple to the hotel where they were having their honeymoon. As he was driving back, he got a phone call on his mobile phone, asking hm if he had the keys to the married couples’ home, as the five missionaries are all staying there for the weekend. He does not have the keys, the only person who has the keys is the groom. The best man turns around and drives back to the hotel. There is no way that he is going to disturb the married couple on their wedding night, the very religious couple on their wedding night, the groom might not have saved himself for marriage during his wild years, but it had been made very clear to everyone that the bride had saved herself for marriage. The best man gets the front desk to ring up for him, no answer. In the end a manager goes up and knocks on their room and gets the keys.
The next day we all drive back south and try to get over the experience.
Over 25 years later:
The groom and bride and still together, and still very happy together, they have four children.
Towel sister of the groom is happily married with three children.
Embarrassed sister of the groom, went to University, became a teacher and is no longer extremely shy, she came back from Uni full of confidence. I bumped into her last year in our local supermarket when she introduced me to her two teenage daughters as the first guy who to got to enjoy her boobs. I was just as embarrassed as her daughters.
Oldest brother of the groom spent so much time in the job centre that he ended up getting a job there.
Youngest brother of the groom is a lovely lad with a great girlfriend, their wedding is next year.
Mother of the groom is still hoping that oldest brother of the groom will meet someone nice sometime and move out, no-one else thinks that is going to happen.
Father of the groom is currently living in a hostel for the homeless. None of his three sons will have anything to do with him, his two daughters take it in turns to do his washing and give him enough food for the week. They do not give him any money.
Me and best man are still very close. We helped each other move into our first homes and decorate them. He was my best man at my wedding, and I was best man at his. I am godfather to his son, he is the named trustee in my will. We supported each other through our divorces. We support each other with our elderly parents and their mad erratic decisions. The only reason we are not meeting up this weekend for a beer and a catch up, is because he is currently dealing with the family drama around his mother in her late 70’s deciding to elope with someone she has only known for two weeks.
I have been to many weddings over the years, this is still the only one I can remeber all of the details of.
submitted by ThrowawayforDobre to CharlotteDobreYouTube [link] [comments]
The Groom was from a small town of just over 3,000 people, in a very rural area in the south of England, the kind of place where everyone knows each other, and it is rare for them to mix with any outsiders. He had been a hard partying wild man, whose main interests were Football, music, and beer. When I was away at university, he saw the light, put his old ways behind him and became born again. Gave up his job and became a missionary. Whilst away doing missionary work, joined by the youngest son of his Baptist minister, the groom met the bride. I nice young girl from the north of England who was also very religious.
After six months of dating, they got engaged, he had moved up to be close to her, got a job and they got a house, although she stayed living with her parents until the wedding.
The stag do was uneventful, the Groom came back down for a weekend for it, and the best man follow the instructions he had been given. A round of golf, the out for a meal then to the Grooms old local pub for the evening. The best man and me where the only ones who where not religious, when I noticed that the where 13 of us for the meal my last supper joke did not go down well. Even the Grooms mother joined us in the pub after the meal. Not the wild night of decadence I would have through his stag do would have been only a few years before.
That’s the boring bit over, now to the Wedding…….
The day before the Wedding my job was to pick up the youngest son of the local Baptist minister first thing in the morning, he was the other usher on the groom’s side, and drive him the length of England to the North of England near the Scottish boarder. The groom had been stressing out as we are both nice easy-going blokes, but we do both have a well and truly earned reputation for being a bit flaky. I’m due to pick him up at 9am, I wake up at 9:40am. Panic, get showered and dressed and run to my car. I get five minutes down the road and then turn around and return to my home to get my wedding suit. I get to the Baptist ministers’ home at 10:40am, I am knocking and ringing the doorbell until I wake the other usher at 11am. He showers and gets dressed whilst I wait in the kitchen for him, his father the minister comes home and me and him chat, he says that he would have loved to have gone to the wedding, but unfortunately, he is performing a wedding ceremony the next day for another couple we all know. Other usher comes down and says that he will make sandwiches for the journey, so we don’t have to stop. We finally get on the road at mid-day three hours late. We drive past my home soon after and I realise that I could have picked up my suit on the way.
The journey was uneventful apart from multiple texts from the best man asking when we would arrive, as the groom has an important job for us to do when we get there. Me and other usher had known each other for years and get on well so we chat and have a good laugh, this is when I found out the news that the wedding his father is doing the next day for the lad and his girlfriend, we all know, it had the same guest list as the groom’s side of the wedding we are going to. The guests had the choice of going to a wedding that most of them could walk to, and the rest would have a five-to-ten-minute drive, or one which would need them to take a day off work and a whole weekend to go to. The groom’s side for this wedding was just, his family, us two ushers, and five people the bride and groom had been missionaries with. When we start to get hungry the other usher looks for the sandwiches he made, only to discover that he has left them on the kitchen counter back at his parents’ house. This is the last time we screw up.
We get to the bride and grooms’ home at 8pm, as we walk to the door it swings open and we are nearly knocked over as the mother of the groom, his two twin sisters, and two brothers storm out of the house. The best man then greets us with the hunted look of a Vietnam veteran with a 1,000-yard stare. The other usher asks where the other missionaries are, the best man says that they are upstairs and other usher quickly disappears to see them. I walk in, the groom is hugging the bride, I say hello, they do not acknowledge me. The best man hands me a cup of tea and we go to the living room and close the door. We can hear the bride howling in tears just the other side of the door as the groom tries to claim her. Me and the best man are both British males, we know full well what to do in this kind of situation, our grand parents lived through the blitz, we drew down into our guts and invoked the Dunkirk spirt, we kept our stiff upper lips like any true Englishman, completely ignored the situation and made small talk about football, sipping our tea. The bride took about 45 minutes to stop crying.
After the wedding I found out , what had gone on, this was the first time the bride was meeting the grooms family, first the groom had asked his two 19 year old sisters to bring their dresses for the wedding along so he could approve them, now I do not know much about women, but one of the few things I do know this that you do not tell your sisters what they can and can not wear, as they will openly and honestly tell you what you can do with that request. Then the mother of the groom gave the couple a lucky horseshoe for there wedding, they refused to accept the gift as they are strict Christians, and the lucky horseshoe is a pagan symbol. Then the father of the groom, who was divorce for the mother of the groom decided to spring a surprise on everyone, he announced that he was bringing his new girlfriend and her toddler to the wedding. This is when the excrement well and truly hit the fan. The new girlfriend the groom also knew well, during his wild times he had known her in the biblical sense on more than one occasion. She was a very friendly and giving young women, in fact most of our friend group had known her biblically as well, some of them knew her in the biblical way two at a time. Thankfully looking at the time line unless it was a two-and-a-half-year pregnancy the toddler was not the grooms. The groom’s mother had openly called the grooms fathers new girlfriend a wh**e, which I feel is unfair, she didn’t ever charge, she was not a professional, she was just a very keen amateur. Over the next few minutes of shouting, it was made clear to the groom’s father that his girlfriend would not be invited to the wedding and there would be trouble if her brought her.
After everything had calmed down, we then drove over to the brides’ parents’ home. Where we had been given the task of blowing up ballons to decorate village hall the reception was taking place in, I was confused at why the groom was so stressed at us being on time so we could do this job. Then when no one else was about the groom gave us our real roles and responsibilities for the next day. Basically, we had the job to be his fathers’ minders during the reception, his father, was a violent, aggressive, alcoholic, and our role was to try and keep him away from other guests, try to stop him from insulting anyone, and if he starts a fight then to get in the middle of it and break it up. Now, I grew up playing Rugby, the sport which American football evolved from, except the only protection we wore was a gumshield and a cup (Known as a cricket box in the UK). I may not be the tallest but at the time I had spent a year working as a builder’s labour (construction worker for the Americans) and had the body I still think in my mind I still have, until I see myself in the mirror when I get out of the shower and realise that I currently have a body that resembles a dropped lasagne. Other usher was sporty, but stick thin, and I doubt that he had ever taken a punch in his life, I knew which of the two of us would be getting in the middle to break up any fight.
The Wedding Day……….
We had stayed in the same budget hotel chain as the groom’s family, except his father. My first responsibility of the day is to drive the mother of the groom to the wedding, along with the youngest brother and other usher. Oldest brother and twin sisters are being driven by oldest brothers’ best mate who was not invited to the wedding but came anyway.
In the morning of the wedding, I am in the hotel’s carpark decorating my car with the traditional white ribbons for wedding cars. The mother of the groom leans out of her ground floor room window and calls me over to the window. I walk over and just as I get there I see over her shoulder and freeze in shock. Both the grooms twin sisters and in the background getting ready for the wedding, one has just a towel wrapped around her, the other is only wearing a thong. They both see me, freeze, then scream and run into the room’s bathroom. I am extremely embarrassed, the groom’s mother, who is very east London just shouts at them,
‘Don’t be so stupid girls, you ain't got nothing he ain't seen before’.
We then go over what time we should leave for the wedding.
Knowing both the groom, and his father are very protective over the twins, even though it was a total accent, this incident could have landed me trouble with them both.
I am so paranoid about being late to the church that we arrive so early that the church is still locked, over the next few hours people arrive. For some strange reason they had decided to go with the traditional bride’s side sitting on one side of the isle, and grooms side sitting on the other. This led to a few issues, on the groom’s side, there were on the first pew, six members of his family, on the second pew, the five missionaries plus me and other usher, and brother of the grooms best mate. On the brides’ side, there where all her friends and family, plus every member of her parents’ church. I suggested that we just filled the empty pews on the groom’s side with guests, but the two ushers on the brides’ side, the bride’s brothers wouldn’t even consider it. Me and other usher had no-one to usher to their seats, as it had started raining, we decided to grab a couple of umbrellas and meet and greet guests as they parked and shield them from the rain. We also started to set out extra seats for the bride’s side as all the pews on that side of the church had been filled, there was over 150 on her side, even though on the groom’s side only two pews had anyone sitting in them and only 14 people.
Then the final guests arrive, they are very elderly, from the church the parents of the bride belong to, they decided to park right in front of the door to the church, I asked them if they could move, they explained that they were not going to the reception and were leaving for a holiday right after the ceremony, so they wanted to leave quickly. I pointed out that they had parked in such a way that the bride would be forced to squeeze down a foot and a half gap between their mud-covered car and a brick wall whilst it was raining to get into her own wedding. They did not see anything wrong with that. There was some back and forth between us, but finally I found a parking spot which they could easily leave early from and was out of the way, they reluctantly moved their car to that spot. Just as the car carrying the bride and her father drove into the carpark.
The ceremony went off without any drama. After the ceremony it is the photos, as each set of photos are done the people leave to go to the reception. The last set to be done are the newly married couple and the groom’s mother. We get to my car, and we realise that no-one has told us where the reception is. There is one last car with wedding guests in leaving at the same time as us, the only other car is the best man’s car, and he is taking the bride and groom. I quickly follow the car that is leaving hoping that they are going to the reception. This is the 90’s, the only two people who have mobile phones are the best man, and me, him as his work supplied him with one, and I had got one as I did not want to be talking to my, at the time recently ex-girlfriend (I broke it off with her a week before and that is why other Usher got to share my hotel room with me as I had already booked and paid for two people for two nights, I had just changed the booking to a twin room) whilst in the same room as my parents on their landline. The best man calls my phone, asking if we know where the reception is, we don’t but we are following a car that might be going there. Groom and Bride do not drive and do not know the way to the reception. Other usher has my phone, he is describing landmarks to best man who is about two minutes behind us, so he can find his way. After 20 minutes of driving thankfully the car I am following is going to the reception and two minutes after we arrive the bride and groom arrive.
We go to our assigned tables for the meal, I am sitting next to the friend of the oldest brother of the groom, opposite him is the oldest brother of the groom, directly opposite me is the only wearing a towel sister of the groom, next to her is the other twin who I saw too much of earlier that day. And next to me is the boyfriend of the maid of honour. I try to make small talk with the boyfriend of the maid of honour, but he is staring daggers at the best man, who is sitting at the head table talking to and looking, like he is really hitting it off with the maid of honour. Boyfriend of maid of honour is not happy, he is in silence for most of the meal but at some points during the meal sounds like he is growling. I later found out that best man and maid of honour both had the same job and just talked shop the whole meal, the only other person best man had to talk to as he was on the head table was youngest brother of groom who was six years old, and as she was at the end of the head table there was no-one on the other side of her, the boyfriend of maid of honour made me feel about as welcome as a ginger haired step son.
The best man speech was interesting, as he had been given strict instructions on what he could say and what he could not say. The stories about the groom stopped at the age of 12, and then jumped to when he became born again. More than half his life had to be skipped over.
Due to the father of the groom, the decision was made to have a dry wedding, apart from a glass of sparkling wine each to toast the bride and groom. Somehow towel sister of the groom managed to get a few glasses of sparkling wine and started to get very flirty with me, as she was rubbing her foot up and down my leg under the table, I moved my leg away, I looked her in the eye and gave a firm shake of the head, thankfully she got the message. The other twin sister, who is very shy and studious, couldn’t even look me in the eye due to embarrassment from the morning.
On the lighter side, the bride who had been starving herself for months before the wedding, ate so much that she burst the zip at the back of her dress, she saw the funny side of it and her mother and sisters all used safety pins to pin it back up so she could then eat some more.
It then comes time for the first dance, this wedding was on a tiny budget, this was before we could burn CD’s at home, so the groom had made a mix tape for the dances, as they were half way into the first dance, the tape player ate the tape. No more music.
Me and other usher spent the rest of the time basically standing in front of father of the groom, who had brought his own bottle of whiskey. We knew that a guaranteed why to provoke violence was to try and take the bottle off him. We became the absorbers of his bile, we bit our tongues as we listened to his racist, anti-Semitic, anti-Islamic, sexist ranting, saying about how the world is against him and none of his problems are his fault. Each time one of his children or his ex-wife came within earshot her would try to provoke them, but they remained stoic.
It then came time for the bride and groom to leave for their honeymoon, I had supplied the oldest brother of the groom and his friend with a can of shaving foam to decorate the wedding car in the traditional manner, they did not disappoint.
Once the bride and groom had left, the rest of the guest all left, no music, no booze, no food there was nothing to stay around for, so the wedding was over by 7:30pm.
I drove the mother of the groom, Youngest brother of the groom and other usher back to the budget chain hotel we were staying in. after dropping them off I went and brough myself a lot of beer, went to oldest brother of the grooms room, as the England football team had been playing a world cup qualifier game that day and had set up a video recorder to record it and we watched the game. Half way through the best man turned up, again with a 1,000 yards stare.
Later I found out what had happened next. The best man had driven the newly married couple to the hotel where they were having their honeymoon. As he was driving back, he got a phone call on his mobile phone, asking hm if he had the keys to the married couples’ home, as the five missionaries are all staying there for the weekend. He does not have the keys, the only person who has the keys is the groom. The best man turns around and drives back to the hotel. There is no way that he is going to disturb the married couple on their wedding night, the very religious couple on their wedding night, the groom might not have saved himself for marriage during his wild years, but it had been made very clear to everyone that the bride had saved herself for marriage. The best man gets the front desk to ring up for him, no answer. In the end a manager goes up and knocks on their room and gets the keys.
The next day we all drive back south and try to get over the experience.
Over 25 years later:
The groom and bride and still together, and still very happy together, they have four children.
Towel sister of the groom is happily married with three children.
Embarrassed sister of the groom, went to University, became a teacher and is no longer extremely shy, she came back from Uni full of confidence. I bumped into her last year in our local supermarket when she introduced me to her two teenage daughters as the first guy who to got to enjoy her boobs. I was just as embarrassed as her daughters.
Oldest brother of the groom spent so much time in the job centre that he ended up getting a job there.
Youngest brother of the groom is a lovely lad with a great girlfriend, their wedding is next year.
Mother of the groom is still hoping that oldest brother of the groom will meet someone nice sometime and move out, no-one else thinks that is going to happen.
Father of the groom is currently living in a hostel for the homeless. None of his three sons will have anything to do with him, his two daughters take it in turns to do his washing and give him enough food for the week. They do not give him any money.
Me and best man are still very close. We helped each other move into our first homes and decorate them. He was my best man at my wedding, and I was best man at his. I am godfather to his son, he is the named trustee in my will. We supported each other through our divorces. We support each other with our elderly parents and their mad erratic decisions. The only reason we are not meeting up this weekend for a beer and a catch up, is because he is currently dealing with the family drama around his mother in her late 70’s deciding to elope with someone she has only known for two weeks.
I have been to many weddings over the years, this is still the only one I can remeber all of the details of.
2024.05.11 21:13 SanderSo47 Directors at the Box Office: Wes Craven
 | https://preview.redd.it/5jhcjegtjuzc1.png?width=1920&format=png&auto=webp&s=71a26f361e87730152e07e12f1bc76322db0b023 submitted by SanderSo47 to boxoffice [link] [comments] Here's a new edition of "Directors at the Box Office", which seeks to explore the directors' trajectory at the box office and analyze their hits and bombs. I already talked about a few, and as I promised, it's Wes Craven's turn. Craven earned a master's degree in philosophy and writing from Johns Hopkins University. He subsequently bought a 16mm film camera and began making short movies. His friend Steve Chapin informed him of a messenger position at a New York City film production co, where his brother, future folk-rock star Harry Chapin worked. He started in the industry as a sound editor, before transitioning as a porn director. He said he made "many hardcore X-rated films" under pseudonyms. And then he transitioned into directing for the big screen. From a box office perspective, how reliable was he to deliver a box office hit? That's the point of this post. To analyze his career. It should be noted that as he started his career in the 1970s, some of the domestic grosses here will be adjusted by inflation. The table with his highest grossing films, however, will be left in its unadjusted form, as the worldwide grosses are more difficult to adjust.The Last House on the Left (1972)"Mari, seventeen, is dying. Even for her, the worst is yet to come."His directorial debut. The film stars Sandra Peabody, Lucy Grantham, David Hess, Fred J. Lincoln, Jeramie Rain, and Marc Sheffler. The plot follows Mari Collingwood, a teenager who is abducted, raped, and tortured by a family of violent fugitives led by Krug Stillo on her seventeenth birthday. When her parents discover what happened to her, they seek vengeance against the family, who have taken shelter at their home. Craven, who had no money at the time, was put on the job of synchronizing dailies for Sean S. Cunningham's Together. They became friends, and Hallmark Releasing gave them $90,000 to make another film. Craven considered a hardcore film, but decided to tone it down a bit. The idea for this film came from Ingmar Bergman's The Virgin Spring, and Craven wanted to make a film in which the violence would be shown in detail onscreen, as he felt that many popular films of the era, such as Westerns, glamorized violence and the "vigilante hero", and gave the public a misleading representation of death in the wake of the Vietnam War. The film attracted negative media attention for its heavy graphic content, and there were calls for some theaters to drop the film. But you know, bad buzz is still buzz and that translated to a pretty good run in theaters, earning up to $3 million in its initial run. Even to this day, the film is polarizing due to its violence and themes. But Craven just made his name well known.
The Hills Have Eyes (1977)"A nice American family. They didn't want to kill. But they didn't want to die."His second film. The film stars Susan Lanier, Michael Berryman and Dee Wallace. The film follows the Carters, a suburban family targeted by a family of cannibal savages after becoming stranded in the Nevada desert. Craven wanted to make a non-horror, but he found that his investors only wanted films with graphic content. At the New York Public Library, Craven checked the library's forensics department, and learned of the legend of Sawney Bean - the alleged head of a 48-person Scottish clan responsible for the murder and cannibalization of more than one thousand people. He drew influences from this, The Texas Chain Saw Massacre and The Grapes of Wrath. Craven also had to cut a lot of scenes to avoid getting an X rating. The film once again drew negative attention for its violence. But it made over $25 million at the box office, which was an even bigger success than House. It subsequently earned a cult following.
Deadly Blessing (1981)"Pray you're not blessed."His third film. It stars Ernest Borgnine, Maren Jensen, Susan Buckner, and Sharon Stone, and tells the story of a strange figure committing murder in a contemporary community that is not far from another community that believes in ancient evil and curses. It received negative reviews, but it was another box office success for Craven.
Swamp Thing (1982)"Science transformed him into a monster. Love changed him even more!"His fourth film. Based on the DC Comics character created by Len Wein and Bernie Wrightson, it stars Louis Jourdan and Adrienne Barbeau. It tells the story of scientist Alec Holland who is transformed into the monster known as Swamp Thing through laboratory sabotage orchestrated by the evil Anton Arcane. Later, he helps a woman named Alice Cable and battles the man responsible for it all, the ruthless Arcane. The film made $2.5 million domestically, despite mixed reviews.
A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984)"If Nancy doesn't wake up screaming, she won't wake up at all."His fifth film. It stars Heather Langenkamp, John Saxon, Ronee Blakley, Johnny Depp, and Robert Englund. The film's plot concerns a group of teenagers who are targeted by Freddy Krueger, an undead child killer who can murder people through their dreams, as retribution against their parents who burned him alive. The film was inspired by several newspaper articles printed in the Los Angeles Times in the 1970s about Hmong refugees, who, after fleeing to the United States because of war and genocide in Laos, Cambodia, and Vietnam, suffered disturbing nightmares and refused to sleep. Some of the men died in their sleep soon after. This, along with the song "Dream Weaver" by Gary Wright, motivated Craven to craft a horror film focused on people dying through their sleep. The film's villain, Freddy Krueger, is drawn from Craven's early life. One night, a young Craven saw an elderly man walking on the sidepath outside the window of his home. The man stopped to glance at a startled Craven and walked off. This served as the inspiration for Krueger. Initially, Fred Krueger was intended to be a child molester, but Craven eventually characterized him as a child murderer to avoid being accused of exploiting a spate of highly publicized child molestation cases that occurred in California around the time of the film's production. He settled on the name Freddy Krueger, which was based on a childhood bully of his. The process of writing the film went smoothly, the real problem was finding a studio. Craven sent it to most studios, and all rejected it. The first studio to show interest was Disney, but Craven declined their offer as they wanted a more toned-down kid-friendly PG-13 flick. When Paramount and Universal also turned it down, Craven decided to go to the independent studio New Line Cinema. The studio only distributed films, but they agreed in financing the film. As they lacked the financial resources for the production, New Line had to turn to external financiers. Despite opening in just 165 theaters, the film earned $1.2 million in its opening weekend, making it clear that it would be an immediate box office success. It eventually closed with $25 million domestically, and $57 million worldwide. It received critical acclaim, and has been referred as one of the best and most influential slashers ever made. Freddy Krueger would soon be hailed as one of the most emblematic figures of horror, and Craven quickly earned a reputation as a horror legend. But most importantly, it was the beginning of New Line Cinema as a studio, which is why it's referred as "the house that Freddy built." The film would later spawn a franchise, although Craven wouldn't direct any of the "sequels." Why the quotation marks? We'll get to that later on.
The Hills Have Eyes Part II (1985)"So you think you're lucky to be alive."His sixth film. The sequel to The Hills Have Eyes, it stars Tamara Stafford, Kevin Spirtas, John Bloom, Michael Berryman, Penny Johnson, Janus Blythe, John Laughlin, Willard E. Pugh, Peter Frechette and Robert Houston. It follows a group of bikers who become stranded in the desert and find themselves fighting off a family of inbred cannibals who live off the land. The film was shot on a very low budget, and it simply ended prematurely because they ran out of funds. There are no box office numbers available, but it received awful reviews. Deadly Friend (1986)"There's no one alive who'll play with the girl next door."His seventh film. Based on the novel Friend by Diana Henstell, it stars Matthew Laborteaux, Kristy Swanson, Michael Sharrett, Anne Twomey, Richard Marcus, and Anne Ramsey. Its plot follows a teenage computer prodigy who implants a robot's processor into the brain of his teenage neighbor after she is pronounced brain dead; the experiment proves successful, but she swiftly begins a killing spree in their neighborhood. Craven wanted to make a PG-rated science fiction film, with a similar tone to Starman, hoping to prove that he could make something that wasn't horror-themed. An unfinished version of the film was screened to a test audience of Craven's fanbase, and it was poorly received for its lack of violence and gore like his previous films. So WB decided to rewrite the film, adding more scenes with tons of gore. This made the final film appear tonally jumbled, and it went from easy PG to struggling to not get an X rating. The film was poorly received for its story and inconsistent tone. It also marked a huge flop at the box office, not even hitting $10 million. Craven lost interest in the film after WB inserted their own version, and he has since disowned the film.
The Serpent and the Rainbow (1988)"Don't bury me, I'm not dead!"His eighth film. It stars Bill Pullman, and is loosely based on the life of ethnobotanist Wade Davis, recounting his experiences in Haiti investigating the story of Clairvius Narcisse, who was allegedly poisoned, buried alive, and revived with a herbal brew which produced what was called a zombie. The film received mixed reactions, but it was a much needed box office success for Craven.
Shocker (1989)"No more Mr. Nice Guy."His ninth film. It stars Michael Murphy, Peter Berg, Cami Cooper, and Mitch Pileggi, and follows a serial killer who uses electricity to come back from the dead and carry out his vengeance on the football player who turned him in to the police. Another mixed bag for Craven, but it was still profitable.
The People Under the Stairs (1991)"In every neighborhood, there's one house that adults whisper about and children cross the street to avoid."His tenth film. It stars Brandon Adams, Everett McGill, Wendy Robie, and A. J. Langer. The plot follows a young boy and two adult robbers who become trapped in a house belonging to a neighborhood's crooked landlords after breaking in to steal their collection of gold coins as the boy learns a dark secret about them and what also lurks in their house. After a slate of mixed performers, the film received Craven's best reviews since Elm Street. To the surprise of Universal, it was also a box office success.
Wes Craven's New Nightmare (1994)"This time, the terror doesn't stop at the screen."His 11th film. The installment in the A Nightmare on Elm Street franchise, it stars Robert Englund, Heather Langenkamp, Miko Hughes and John Saxon. The film is not part of the same continuity as previous films, and it portrays Freddy Krueger as a fictional movie villain who invades the real world and haunts the cast and crew involved in the making of the films about him. While Craven co-wrote the franchise's third installment, Dream Warriors, he wasn't that involved with the rest of the franchise. He wanted to make a deliberately more cerebral film than recent entries to the franchise, as he considered them as being cartoonish, and not faithful to his original themes. Specifically, he wanted Freddy to resemble his original vision: far darker and less comical. To reinforce this, the character's make-up and outfit were enhanced, with one of the most prominent differences being that he now wears a long blue/black trenchcoat. In addition, the signature glove was redesigned for a more organic look, with the fingers resembling bones and having muscle textures in between. The film received high praise, and was considered as the best film in the franchise since the original (it was Englund's favorite). But the franchise has been bleeding interest at the box office, and New Nightmare unfortunately had to suffer. It was profitable, but it became the lowest grossing film in the franchise.
Vampire in Brooklyn (1995)"A comic tale of horror and seduction."His 12th film. It stars Eddie Murphy, Angela Bassett, Allen Payne, Kadeem Hardison, John Witherspoon, Zakes Mokae, and Joanna Cassidy. It follows a Caribbean vampire who seduces a Brooklyn police officer who has no idea that she is half-vampire. The film had awful reviews, and despite the presence of a huge star like Eddie Murphy, it disappointed at the box office. Craven really needed a hit.
Scream (1996)"Someone has taken their love of scary movies one step too far."His 13th film. It stars David Arquette, Neve Campbell, Courteney Cox, Matthew Lillard, Rose McGowan, Skeet Ulrich and Drew Barrymore. Set in the fictional town of Woodsboro, California, Scream's plot follows high school student Sidney Prescott and her friends, who, on the anniversary of her mother's murder, become the targets of a costumed serial killer known as Ghostface. As he was trying to make it in the industry, Kevin Williamson watched a Turning Point documentary about serial killer Danny Rolling which he said left him unsettled. Williamson later noticed an open window, armed himself with a knife, and called his friend for support. The pair began discussing horror characters that had resonated with them such as Freddy Krueger and Jason Voorhees. This experience prompted Williamson to start developing a concept wherein a girl is haunted by a caller. He started writing a film titled Scary Movie, and even left an outline for possible sequels. The concept was part of an era where there was debate over the influence of cinematic violence on audience, with Williamson coming up with a brilliant line "movies don't create psychos, movies make psychos more creative." It was inspired by many 1980s slashers, even though the genre was on decline by that point. His characters were intentionally designed to be knowledgeable about these horror films and their typical elements, with the intention of creating a unique killer who was not only aware of horror film clichés but also exploited them for his own advantage. While Williamson struggled with his previous films, this script was part of a bidding war with the studios, to the point that Oliver Stone himself wanted to direct it. Miramax (through Dimension Films) bought the script, and Williamson made some rewrites to scale back the violence. Bob Weinstein also wanted to change the name, as he believed the audiences would think the film is a comedy. The studio considered Danny Boyle, Tom McLoughlin, Sam Raimi, Robert Rodriguez, George A. Romero, Quentin Tarantino, and Anthony Waller as prime candidates to direct the film, but they all preferred to view the film as a comedy. Wes Craven was considered, but the studio believed he couldn't direct a satire. Craven also wasn't planning on directing it, as he wanted to focus on more mainstream films to salvage his career. Craven's assistant Julie Plec (who would collaborate with Williamson on The Vampire Diaries) convinced him in helming the project. By signing, Craven decided to get back some of the gore that was missing in the previous drafts. A huge contrast to the horror films of the era was that the film had established actors as the leads, as Craven and Williamson wanted to prove that no character was safe. Drew Barrymore had already starred in a few recognizable names, Neve Campbell was on the hit show Party of Five, Rose McGowan was known for Encino Man and The Doom Generation, David Arquette, Matthew Lillard and Skeet Ulrich were recognizable supporting characters, and Courteney Cox obviously was known for Friends. Vince Vaughn and Natasha Lyonne were the preferred choices for Billy and Tatum, but external problems caused them to drop out. After viewing the dailies raw footage, the Weinsteins criticized the quality of Craven's work as "workmanlike at best", believing it lacked tension and had an inconsistent tone. The Weinsteins also disliked the mask design, and said Barrymore lacked sex appeal because of the pageboy hairstyle she had chosen. While filming the final fight, Campbell's stuntwoman accidentally stabbed Ulrich with an umbrella tip, missing the protective vest he was wearing and hitting the site of an open heart surgery Ulrich had as a child. During post-production, Harvey Weinstein decided to name the film as Scream based on the Michael and Janet Jackson song. In a surprising move, the Weinsteins decided to release the film during the holiday season as counter-programming, offering teenagers an alternative to more traditional holiday fare. The decision was unpopular with the cast and crew, with Williamson expecting the film to fail. The film opened with $6.4 million and finishing in fourth place, leading analysts to consider the film as a bomb. But the film just kept growing. Buoyed by positive word of mouth, the Weinsteins increased marketing and the film managed to increase in its second and third weekends. It closed with $103 million domestically and $173 million worldwide, becoming the highest grossing slasher film ever and Craven's highest grossing film ever. The film received critical acclaim for its characters and writing, and has since been deemed as one of the most influential horror films of all time. It rekindled interest in horror, resurrected Craven's career and launched the careers of Williamson and the cast.
Scream 2 (1997)"Someone has taken their love of sequels one step too far."His 14th film. The sequel to Scream, it stars David Arquette, Neve Campbell, Courteney Cox, Sarah Michelle Gellar, Jamie Kennedy, Laurie Metcalf, Jerry O'Connell, Elise Neal, Timothy Olyphant, Jada Pinkett, and Liev Schreiber. The film takes place two years after the first film and again follows the character of Sidney Prescott, along with other survivors of the Woodsboro massacre, at the fictional Windsor College in Ohio where they are targeted by a copycat killer using the guise of Ghostface. As Williamson already had plans for sequels, the idea was for Sidney to attend college while being stalked by a copycat Ghostface killer. As filming began, Williamson's script had four killers: Derek, Hallie, Cotton Weary, and Nancy Loomis. But after Williamson transferred his script to the production, it was leaked onto the Internet in full, revealing the identity of the killers and a large amount of the involved plot. This resulted in the production continuing to film with only a partial script while Williamson conducted extensive rewrites, changing much of the film's finale, the identities of the film's killers and drastically altering the roles of other characters such as Randy Meeks and Joel. With a short deadline, Williamson couldn't fully compromise on the final script, forcing Craven to fill in the gaps himself. So the film was one of the very first cases where the Internet leaked major aspects of a film. As the Weinsteins wanted the film ready for December, it was able to capitalize on the audience's word of mouth to the original. It opened with $32 million in its first weekend, almost five times as big as the original, and the biggest December debut. It didn't hold as great as the original due to the competition, such as Titanic, but it still made $172.3 million worldwide, almost matching the original's gross. It also received very positive reviews, and so a profitable franchise was already underway.
Music of the Heart (1999)"She gave them a gift they could never imagine. They gave the system a fight it would never forget."His 15th film. The film stars Meryl Streep, Aidan Quinn, Angela Bassett, Gloria Estefan, Jane Leeves, Kieran Culkin and Jay O. Sanders. The film is a dramatization of the true story of Roberta Guaspari, who co-founded the Opus 118 Harlem School of Music and fought for music education funding in New York City public schools. After seeing the documentary Small Wonders, Craven was inspired to make a full-length film about Guaspari. Madonna was originally signed to play the role of Guaspari, but left the project before filming began, citing "creative differences" with Craven. When she left, Madonna had already studied for many months to play the violin. Streep learned to play Bach's Concerto for 2 Violins for the film. The project marked a huge departure for Craven; it was his first and only film to be rated PG, and his only one to not be horror or thriller. It received generally positive reviews, but it bombed at the box office. It received 2 Oscar nominations for Best Actress and Best Original Song, the only Craven film to get any noms.
Scream 3 (2000)"The most terrifying scream is always the last."His 16th film. The third installment in the Scream franchise, it stars David Arquette, Neve Campbell, Courteney Cox Arquette, Parker Posey, Patrick Dempsey, Scott Foley, Lance Henriksen, Matt Keeslar, Jenny McCarthy, Emily Mortimer, Deon Richmond, and Patrick Warburton. The film's story takes place one year after the previous film's events and follows Sidney Prescott, who has gone into self-imposed isolation following the events of the previous two films but is drawn to Hollywood after a new Ghostface begins killing the cast of the film within a film Stab 3. The plans for a sequel were already underway since Williamson sold the script, although Williamson still didn't write a script yet. When the Weinsteins approached him to write the film, Williamson was already busy with many projects (including his directorial debut), and was unavailable to perform his duties. He only made a 20-page outline wherein Ghostface would return just as production on a fictional film Stab 3 would be filmed. His plan was to show the killers were part of a Stab fan club (this idea would later be adapted into his show, The Following). With Williamson not available, Ehren Kruger was tasked in writing. Shortly before production began on the film, the Columbine High School massacre took place, and many parties began looking for reasoning behind the shooters' actions and there came an increased scrutiny on the role of the media in society, including video games and film, and the influence it could have on an audience. With production of Scream 3 not yet underway, there were considerations about whether the film should be made at that time, aware of the potential for negative attention but the studio decided to press forward, albeit with changes. The Weinsteins demanded to scale back on the gore and emphasize its satiric humor, as well as moving the setting to Hollywood. At one point in the production, the studio went as far as demanding that the film feature no blood or on-screen violence at all, a drastic departure for the series, but Craven directly intervened. One of the aspects changed was that the killer would be revealed to be Stu Macher, having survived the original film. The Weinsteins changed it after Columbine, as they didn't want to associate violence and murder with a high school setting. The film opened with $34.7 million, a franchise record and the biggest February debut ever. But it had weak legs, although it still made a very profitable $161.8 million worldwide. While the previous films were well-received, this film received negative reviews, who lambasted the film for becoming the very own thing it satirizes.
Cursed (2005)"What doesn't kill you makes you stronger."His 17th film. It stars Christina Ricci, Joshua Jackson, Jesse Eisenberg, Judy Greer, Scott Baio, Milo Ventimiglia, Shannon Elizabeth and Mýa, and follows two orphaned siblings attacked by a werewolf loose in Los Angeles. Kevin Williamson started working on a script that followed the exploits of a New York City serial killer who discovers that his lethal tendencies are due to his lycanthrope nature. When one of his projects was scrapped, Craven decided to direct, teaming them up again for another Scream reunion. But it wasn't planned like that. Craven was making a film, Pulse, when Bob Weinstein abruptly pulled the movie from the schedule ten days before shooting and cut through all the slow lanes, wanting Craven to get to Cursed as soon as possible. Craven was reportedly not pleased so Weinstein doubled his pay in order for him to direct the film. The director deemed the script too tonally similar to his film Vampire in Brooklyn, but felt pressured by the studio, leading him to ultimately sign on. The film started filming in January 2003, hoping to get the film released in August. In June, they only had six days left for filming. Suddenly, Dimension Films decided to put the movie on hold because top executives at the company weren't happy with the film's ending or how the special effects were progressing, specifically the look of the film's lead lupine. Rick Baker was preparing the final transformation effects when production stopped and asked Weinstein to let his team finish the work in order for it to be ready for the reshoot, but he refused. Patrick Lussier was brought in for massive rewrites, and the film didn't return to production until November. Baker was fired, and the prosthetic make-up was replaced with CGI. Skeet Ulrich filmed his scene as one of the leads, but chose to drop out following the reshoots as he disliked the new direction. It was also heavily edited to get the R rating down to PG-13. The budget was originally $35 million, yet some reports suggest it ballooned all the way to $100 million, making it one of the most expensive horror films ever. With that budget, it was clear it was not going to be a box office success. It flopped with just $29 million worldwide, and was panned by critics. Craven himself dislikes the final product, and a director's cut was never an option because his original ending was never filmed.
Red Eye (2005)"Fear takes flight."His 18th film. It stars Rachel McAdams, Cillian Murphy, and Brian Cox. The story follows a hotel manager ensnared in an assassination plot by a terrorist while aboard a red-eye flight to Miami. The film received Craven's best reviews in years, and was a box office success, earning almost $100 million. While he is fine with people loving it, Cillian Murphy is not really fond of the film, "I love Rachel McAdams and we had fun making it but I don’t think it's a good movie. It’s a good B movie."
My Soul to Take (2010)"Only one has the power to save their souls."His 19th film. It stars Max Thieriot, Denzel Whitaker, Raul Esparza, and Shareeka Epps. It follows Adam "Bug" Hellerman, who is one of seven teenagers chosen to die following the anniversary of a serial killer's death. This was Craven's first film in almost two decades where he would be directing, producing and writing. But that didn't pan out to a success: it was a critical and commercial dud.
Scream 4 (2011)"New decade. New rules."His 20th and final film. The fourth installment in the Scream franchise, it stars David Arquette, Neve Campbell, Courteney Cox, Emma Roberts, Hayden Panettiere, Anthony Anderson, Alison Brie, Adam Brody, Rory Culkin, Marielle Jaffe, Erik Knudsen, Mary McDonnell, Marley Shelton, Nico Tortorella, and Roger L. Jackson. The film takes place on the fifteenth anniversary of the original Woodsboro murders from Scream and involves Sidney Prescott returning to the town after ten years, where Ghostface once again begins killing students from Woodsboro High. In 2010, Williamson and Craven confirmed their plans for a new film. Craven said that endless sequels, the modern spew of remakes, film studios, and directors are the butts of parodies in the film. The main characters have to figure out where the horror genre is in current days to figure out the modern events happening to and around them. This was the first film in the franchise to use CGI, with the knife's blade added in post-production. Even though the franchise was profitable, it seemed like its glory days were long behind it by the time it hit theaters. The film disappointed in its opening weekend with just $18 million, and closed with a weak $97 million worlwide, far less than the previous films. It also received mixed reviews, particularly for its writing and new characters. It was the last film directed by Craven before his death in 2015.
MOVIES (FROM HIGHEST GROSSING TO LEAST GROSSING)
The VerdictQuite inconsistent, but a very iconic figure in the horror genre. You know you made it big when your creations include Elm Street and Scream. Craven often struggled with difficult productions (you can blame the Weinsteins for that), but he still managed to make competent and scary films, even if some are better than others. Some even see critical re-appraisal as time passes; even Scream 3 and Scream 4 have their fans. We don't know what he would've done with the franchise after the fourth film, but he made it clear he was exhausted by having to film without finished scripts. Rest in Peace to a horror legend.Hope you liked this edition. You can find this and more in the wiki for this section. The next director will be Clint Eastwood. I think I'll have to make two posts, given that he directed 42 films. I asked you to choose who else should be in the run and the comment with the most upvotes would be chosen. Well, we'll later talk about... Ang Lee. A legendary Asian director. This is the schedule for the following four:
And that theme is: controversial directors. I'm talking directors who have attained a polarizing response to their films (like Zack Snyder), or the directors themselves are also controversial figures in real life (like Oliver Stone). Basically, a director that has as many fans as haters. |
2024.05.11 19:48 EsPov_ToDevCou ACCA F6 Taxation UK, Chapter 2 Computing taxable income and the income tax liability(UK vs VN basis)
Lời nói đầu
Bài này sẽ nói cho bạn biết một vài thứ:- Cho bạn biết cách nào để đường đường chính trở thành công dân của một quốc gia (ở đây là Anh quốc, những nước khác có thể giống hoặc khác nhưng về bản chất thì sẽ như vầy).
- Đây sẽ cho bạn biết một cá nhân có thể có mấy nguồn thu nhập từ đó lên kế hoạch cho mình.
- Nó là cú tát thẳng mặt cho những người nghĩ là thuế VN thấp, ở VN sướng. Và nó cũng cho các bạn biết được như thế nào là một chánh phủ vì dân.
- Cách tính thuế (Anh quốc, những nước khác cũng sẽ tương tụ vầy thôi).
Nếu các bạn đến với post này để có thêm sự hiểu biết, thì nó dành cho bạn. Nhưng tin tui đi nó sẽ cho các bạn thấy sự thật và giúp các có động lực để thoát nghèo. Tui biết những bài như vầy rất là khô khan, nhưng mà thêm là bớt mà bớt là thêm. Nếu nhí nhố quá nó sẽ mất đi tính khách quan, vậy nên tui đã tạo ra dấu {} như là lời tâm tình của Bác. 😂😂
Có bạn góp ý với tui là tui viết tiếng Anh nhiều quá, nhưng các bạn biết rồi kinh tế thị trường xuất phát từ những nước tư bản nên dùng tiếng của họ là chính xác nhứt. Cố dịch sẽ hiểu sai. Và cũng vì nó là thuế, thuế là luật nên sẽ hông thể diễn giải theo ý của mình được nên tui chỉ có thể giải thích trong dấu {} thôi. Một điều nữa là thuế ở xứ tư bản đều tính theo năm chứ hông theo tháng như ở VN, chú ý kỹ điều này khi thực hiện phép so sánh (recommend: nên đổi về năm hết).
Trên tinh thần học thuật nên tui phải cố kìm nén cảm xúc của mình chứ bình thường tui bình luận thì “độc địa” lắm. Các bạn cũng nên chủ động tra từ điển hoặc những thứ dễ dàng tìm được trên Google, tui chỉ giải thích những thứ khó hiểu.
Nguồn:
1/ BPP F6 Tx UK
2/ https://www.gov.uk/
Learning objectives
- Explain how the residence of an individual is determined.
- Compute the tax payaple on saving and dividend income.
- Recognise the treatment of individual savings accounts (ISAs) and other tax-exempt investment.
- Understand how the accrued income scheme applies to UK Government securities (gilts).
- Prepare a basic income tax computation involving different types of income.
- Calculate the amount of personal allowance available.
- Understand the impact of the transferable amount of personal allowance for spouses and civil partners.
- Compute the amount of income tax payable.
- Understand the treatment of interest paid for a qualifying purpose.
- Understand the treatment of gift aid donations and charitable giving.
- Explain and compute the child benefit tax charge.
- Understand the treatment of property owned jointly by a married couple, or by a couple in a civil partnership.
- Understand how a married couple or a couple in a civil partnership can minimise their tax liabilities.
- Basic income tax planning.
Knowledge diagnostic
{cho bạn nào chưa biết thì phần này cho các bạn biết trọng tâm của mỗi la mã trong bài}- Scope of income tax UK resident individuals are liable to income tax on all income. Non-UK resident individuals are only liable to UK income tax on UK income only. There is a statutory test of residence.
- Income tax computation Make sure you learn the proforma.
- Types of income Income is categorised into three sections: non-savings, savings and dividend income.
- Personal allowance Everyone receives a personal allowance. However, if adjusted net income > £100,000 it is reduced by £1 for every £2 excess income.
- Computing tax payable Non-savings income is taxed at 20% /40% / 45%. Savings income is taxed at 0% / 20% /40% /45%. Dividend income is taxed at 0% / 8.75% / 33.75%/39.35%.
- Gift aid Gift aid donations enable the taxpayer to save tax at their marginal rate. For higher and additional rate taxpayers, this is achieved by extending the basic rate and higher rate limits by the gross donation.
- Qualifying interest Interest on certain loans can be deducted from total income.
- Married couples/civil partners Split property income 50:50 for spouses/civil partners unless election for actual entitlements. Each spouse/civil partner should use their personal allowance, savings income nil rate band and dividend nil rate band.
- Child benefit charge If ANI is between £50,000 and £60,000, the charge will be 1% of amount received for every £100 of income over £50,000.
- Accrued income scheme Seller taxed on accrued interest received on sale. Buyer given tax relief against interest received of seller's accrued interest.
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{Mọi người sẽ thắc mắc có “chẩn đoán kiến thức” (Knowledge diagnostic, tạm dịch) rồi thêm cái này chi. Đây là mind map, đọc cái tên là các bạn biết công dụng của nó rồi, nó giúp mình định vị mình đang ở đâu và khoanh vùng cái mình đã hiểu hoặc chưa hiểu. Còn cái “chẩn đoán kiến thức” nó như chú thích trong bản đồ.}
1. Scope of income tax
1.1 Residence
1.1.1 Statutory residence testsA taxpayer's residence has important consequences in establishing the tax treatment of their UK and overseas income and capital gains. Generally, an individual who is UK resident is taxed on worldwide income whereas a non-UK resident is liable to UK income tax only on income arising in the UK.Statute sets out tests to determine whether or not an individual is UK resident in a tax year.The operation of the tests can be summarised as follows:
Statute sets out tests to determine whether or not an individual is UK resident in a tax year.
The operation of the tests can be summarised as follows:
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{Ở đây các bạn phải phân biệt được 2 khái niệm “công dân” (citizen) và “cư dân” (resident). Công dân thì có quốc tịch, còn cư dân là bạn phải thỏa mãn điều kiện của quy định cư trú của nước sở tại, nôm na là phải lưu trú đủ số ngày, tháng. Tức là dù bạn có quốc tịch, nhưng bạn đã rời khỏi quốc gia đó quá lâu thì bạn không còn là cư dân ở đó, nhưng vẫn là công dân vì bạn còn quốc tịch mà. Đó là lý do mà bạn thấy nhiều người ở VN 6 tháng rồi trở lại Mỹ 6 tháng là vậy.}
{những mục lục tiếp theo sẽ là quy trình test một người có phải là cư dân hay không}
1.1.2 Automatic overseas tests
The automatic overseas tests must be considered first. An individual will automatically not be UK resident for the whole tax year if:
- They spend less than 16 days in the UK during that tax year; or
- They spend less than 46 days in the UK during a tax year and were not resident during the previous three tax years; or
- They work full time overseas throughout that tax year and spend less than 91 days in the UK during that tax year.
- They spend less than 16 days in the UK during that tax year; or
- They spend less than 46 days in the UK during a tax year and were not resident during the previous three tax years; or
- They work full time overseas throughout that tax year and spend less than 91 days in the UK during that tax year.
If an individual's residence cannot be determined by any of the automatic tests, their status will be determined by the number of ties they have with the UK and how many days they are present in the UK in a tax year. There are five ties:
- Having close family in the UK (spouse/civil partner or minor child).
- Having accommodation in the UK in which the individual spends at least one night during the tax year.
- Doing substantive work in the UK (at least 40 days working at least three hours a day).
- Being in the UK for more than 90 days during either of the two previous tax years
- Spending more time in the UK than in any other country in the tax year (only relevant if individual was UK resident in any of the previous three tax years).
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1.1.5 Day spent in the UK
A day in the UK is any day in which an individual is present in the UK at midnight.
{Đây là câu chốt để biết một ngày được tính bắt đầu từ thời điểm nào}
2. Computing taxable income
An individual’s income from all sources is brought together (aggregated) in personal tax computation for each for each year.🔑 Tax year: The tax year, or fiscal year, or y*ear of assessment *runs from 6 April to 5 April. For example, the tax year 2023/2024 run from 6 April 2023 to 5 April 2024.
{Chúng ta cần phân biệt 2 khái niệm “fiscal year” và “financial year”.
1/ Fiscal year (năm tính thuế) là đủ 12 tháng ngày bắt đầu và ngày kết thúc như trên.
2/ Financial year (năm tài chánh) là nhiều hoặc ít hơn 12 tháng bắt đầu ngày nào cũng được. Nó tương ứng tình huống thực tế; khi mở doanh nghiệp hoặc cá nhân tìm việc làm. Đâu thể đợi ngay ngày 6/4 hay 5/4 mới thành lập hay ký hợp đồng lao động.
cái này có thể hơi lằng nhằn, nôm na giống như khi ai hỏi tuổi của bạn. Bạn nói tui 24 tuổi. Nhưng thực sự là bạn sống được 23 năm 4 tháng 15 ngày hoặc 24 năm 2 tháng 13 ngày. Chỉ khi bạn đăng ký thi bằng lái xe người ta mới cần tính kỹ như vậy}
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{Đây là công thức tính thuế cho một cá nhân bao gồm toàn bộ nguồn thu nhập. Giải thích một số thuật ngữ:
- Dividend: cổ tức _ an amount of the profits that a company pays to people who own shares in the company
- Loss relief: khoản lỗ}
Net income: Net income is total income after qualifying interest and trade losses.
Taxable income: Taxable income is net income less the personal allowance.
3. Type of income
Income must be classified according to the nature of the income as different computational rules apply to different types of income.3.1 Non-savings income
- Non-savings income consists of:
- Trading income {phát sinh từ nguồn self-employed, nôm na là tự kinh doanh}
- Employment income. {thu nhập từ làm thuê, salary + welfare}
- Property income.
- Pension income. {đây là lương hưu từ national insurance, ở VN gọi là BHXH}
Savings income is interest income, including:
- Bank interest
- Building society interest
- Interest from company loan stock
- Interest from government stocks (gilts)
- Interest from National Savings & Investments accounts
Dividend income is the dividends received from owning shares in companies.
3.4 Exempt income
Income from certain investments is exempt from income tax. They are therefore useful for tax planning to minimise tax from investments.
Exempt income:
- Income from National Savings Certificates
- Statutory redundancy money
- Winnings (including premium bond prizes) {tiền hoặc hiện vật mà bạn trúng thưởng, kể cả xổ số kiến thiết (XSKT) (National lottery). Để tìm hiểu thêm chức năng XSKT ở Anh , Link 1, Link 2); các bạn sẽ bất ngờ. Nói thật ở VN tui cũng chưa bao giờ được biết tiền xskt để làm gì? Đi đâu, về đâu?}
- Scholarships
- Interest on damages for personal injuries
- Local authority grants
- Income from investments made through individual savings accounts (ISAs)
3.4.1 Individual savings account (ISAs)
There are two types of ISA:
- Cash ISA (which only has a cash component)
- Stocks and shares ISA (which only has a stocks and shares component unless the provider allows some cash to be held in this type of ISA)
{Thuật ngữ này tui đã đề cập ở chapter 1 sang chapter này sẽ giải thích rõ hơn, khi bạn thấy dòng “£20,000 per tax year (2023/24)”. Nó có nghĩa là con số £20,000 này nó sẽ được điều chỉnh tăng giảm theo từng năm dựa vào lạm phát và chỉ số CPI để phù hợp với tình hình kinh tế đảm bảo đời sống người dân. Chức năng của nó là để khuyến khích người dân có khoản tiết kiệm và dùng số tiền này đầu tư vào các công ty có dòng tiền luân chuyển tạo thêm của cải}
Dividend income and interest income received from investments held in an ISA are exempt from income tax. Likewise, gains on disposal of such investments are free from capital gains tax. Note that additional rate taxpayers and individuals who have already used their savings income nil band will benefit from using a cash ISA .
4.Personal allowance
The personal allowance (PA) is £12,570. It is deducted from net income to arrive at taxable income, firstly against non-savings income, then savings income and finally against dividend income. It is given to all individuals (subject to tapering - see next paragraph) including children.
{tiếng Việt là trợ cấp cá nhân, PA ở VN link. Đúng vậy, chỉ có nhiêu đó thôi. Nếu đem nó quy ra đô la Mỹ chia tỷ lệ với GDP bình quân của UK link vs VN link thì bạn biết nó thảm như nào rồi. Con số này chưa bao gồm ảnh hưởng chênh lệch giàu nghèo, trình độ cư dân, môi trường sống}
4.1 Tapering of the personal allowance
If an individual's adjusted net income (ANI) exceeds £100,000, the personal allowance is reduced by £1 for every £2 excess income. Once an individual's 'adjusted net income' reaches £125,140 or over, the personal allowance will be reduced to nil.🔑 Adjusted net income: Adjusted net income is net income less the gross amounts of personal pension contributions and gift aid donations.
{Khi thu nhập vượt qua £100,000 thì PA sẽ giảm dần theo tỷ lệ £1 cho £2 thu nhập vượt quá, đến phần ví dụ sẽ rõ}
https://preview.redd.it/9e2csob7jtzc1.png?width=621&format=png&auto=webp&s=b63de78ffcad786aa753fe89c2f8eb500b3f9601
{Lưu ý: thu nhập tính theo năm. Ví dụ có lời giải rồi, đáng lẽ tui cũng hổng nên giải thích, tui chiều mấy bạn quá mà.
Clare có tổng thu nhập là £110,500. Có nghĩa là vượt £100,000 là £10,500. Theo tỷ lệ 1:2 như trên định nghĩa. Nên con số PA bị giảm là £5,250. Con số PA được hưởng PA= £12,570 - £5,250 = £7,320}
5. Computing tax payable
Having calculated the taxable income, an exam question could ask for one of two things:- Tax liability
- Tax payable
🔑 Income tax liability: Income tax liability is the amount of tax charged on the individual's taxable income.
Income tax payable is computed on an individual's taxable income. The tax rates are applied to taxable income first to non-savings income, then to savings income and finally to dividend income.
5.1 Tax rates
https://preview.redd.it/bk6qd195xtzc1.png?width=634&format=png&auto=webp&s=249fa2522cf188982150fc3aa3de11dde559e904
{Đây là link thuế suất thuế thu nhập VN, link. Tui sẽ hông vội so sánh ở đây mà cuối bài tui sẽ làm hẳn một cái scenario.}
{Tui nói cho các nghe bí mật này. Các bạn để ý quốc gia nào mà GDP bình quân đầu người gần bằng hoặc cao hơn mức thu nhập chịu thuế ở mốc thuế suất 20%, toàn nước tam quyền phân lập, càng cao hơn lại càng dân chủ; kỳ lạ thiệt}
{Các bạn thử search đi rồi comment dưới phần bình luận, tui làm trước}
{Anh quốc thu nhập chịu thuế suất 20% là £37,700 = $47,218.24}
https://preview.redd.it/bae5h7zaxtzc1.png?width=621&format=png&auto=webp&s=124cc98a64a4c87c511d1e983408ddedf54acfc7
5.2 Computations with non-savings income only
https://preview.redd.it/kub8u88dxtzc1.png?width=620&format=png&auto=webp&s=5422f67a3f47ffa0ad1fc27e3857dc5567788666
{con số £125,140 là số thu nhập mà khoản PA = 0,
125,140 - 100,000 = 25,140, PA = 12,570 - 25,140/2 = 0 }
5.3 Computation with non-savings and savings income
5.3.1 Savings income starting rate
There is a tax rate of 0% for savings income up to £5,000 (the savings income starting rate limit). This rate is called the savings income starting rate. The savings income starting rate only applies where the savings income falls in the first £5,000 of taxable income.
Remember that income tax is charged first on non-savings income. So, in most cases, an individual's non-savings income will exceed the savings income starting rate limit and the savings income starting rate will not be available on savings income.
{con số £5,000 này nó thể hiện sự nhân bản, ưu đãi cho savings income. Với những người thu nhập thấp (cái khoản Non-savings income thấp), mà chỉ sống dựa vào tiền lãi (savings income) thì họ sẽ được ưu đãi thêm thuế suất 0% của £5,000 bên phần savings income của họ, sẽ giải thích rõ bên dưới phần minh họa}
The savings income starting rate counts towards the basic rate limit of £37,700 and the higher rate limit of £125,140.
5.3.2 Savings income nil rate band
There is a tax rate of 0% for savings income within the savings income nil rate band. The savings income nil rate band for 2023/24 is £1,000 if the individual is a basic rate taxpayer, and £500 if the individual is a higher rate taxpayer. There is no savings income nil rate band for additional rate taxpayers. The savings income nil rate band counts towards the basic rate limit of £37,700 and the higher rate limit of £125,140.
{Lại là ưu đãi (dành cho savings income), con số này sẽ thay đổi tùy vào từng năm theo lạm phát và CPI, £1,000 thu nhập thấp, £500 cho trung lưu, £0 cho thu nhập cao}
https://preview.redd.it/nv3ukb5qytzc1.png?width=604&format=png&auto=webp&s=eeb97111b521f4feb86ea447bb263818b0af98fd
{Như tui đã nói ở lời mở đầu, ACCA là chứng chỉ nghề nghiệp nên mọi scenario đều là thực tế. Con số £5,000 dành cho đối tượng là người hông làm ra tiền (non-savings income thấp) như người già, về hưu, tàn tật; chủ yếu dựa vào thu nhập từ tiền savings income.
Các bạn nhìn vào hình thấy cô Alicia này tổng thu nhập là £23,170 trong khi gdp bình quân đầu người của Anh là $46.125,26 (để ý ký hiệu ngoại tệ), so ra thì thu nhập rất là thấp.
Bạn nhìn xuống phần tính thuế của savings income sẽ thấy phép tính £2,400 (5,000 - 2,600) x 0%
này là do quy ước tính toán bên Anh nên người ta viết vậy (tui thấy kiểu viết này nó gọn), người VN mình sẽ thấy hơi khó hiểu, phép tính (5,000 - 2,600) là để giải thích cho chúng ta biết £2,400 từ đâu mà ra. Theo kiểu VN sẽ là :
(5,000 - 2,600) = £2,400
2,400 x 0% = £0
Để hưởng trọn vẹn £5,000 này thì thu nhập từ Non-savings income ≤ (PA =12,570), lớn hơn đồng nào thì bị trừ.
Con số £1,000 này là được hưởng theo mức thu nhập, do net income của Alicia ≤ £37,700 (xem lại bảng phân loại thu nhập) nên được hưởng ưu đãi £1,000, thu nhập trung bình £500, thu nhập cao £0}
https://preview.redd.it/dcvjmxjj0uzc1.png?width=667&format=png&auto=webp&s=7eab7d54206e64a845e11ddbe4d830f4dde9b15f
{tương tự}
5.4 Computations with non-savings, savings and dividend income
5.4.1 Dividend nil rate band
There is a tax rate of 0% for dividend income within the dividend nil rate band. The dividend nil rate band is £1,000 for all taxpayers.
The dividend nil rate band counts towards the basic rate limit of £37,700 and the higher rate limit of £125,140.
{Lại ưu đãi, £1,000 lần này là dành cho dividend income}
https://preview.redd.it/gnzlxskz0uzc1.png?width=571&format=png&auto=webp&s=58fca987159de15193d91e9fb9c8ecaf615594ad
{ở minh họa này là điển hình cho thu nhập của một người Anh}
{ảnh bị chia ra 2 nửa, nửa trên là tính và phân loại thu nhập, nửa dưới từ dòng chữ “income tax” là tính thuế thu nhập}
{tui dung từ “ưu đãi” là chưa đúng trong chuyên môn, đúng ra là trợ cấp (allowance)}
5.5 Transferable personal allowance (marriage allowance)
An individual can elect to transfer £1,260 of their PA to their spouse/civil partner if certain conditions are met. This is sometimes known as the marriage allowance.
Neither the spouse or civil partner making the transfer nor the spouse or civil partner receiving the transfer can be a higher rate or additional rate taxpayer. The spouse/civil partner receiving the transfer does not have an increased PA. Instead, they are entitled to a tax reducer of £1,260 x 20% = £252. The tax reducer reduces the individual's tax liability. If the individual has a tax liability of less than £252, the tax reducer reduces the tax liability to nil.
{phía trên là trợ cấp dành cho tất cả mọi người, kết hôn xong hưởng thêm trợ cấp. Khoản trợ cấp này cho cặp vợ chồng kiểu một người nội trợ, một người thu nhập chính. Cái nước gì mà lắm trợ cấp thế.}
https://preview.redd.it/d9lrfcqw1uzc1.png?width=585&format=png&auto=webp&s=be27d28278de86e26fedf35c52b549049dbfa765
{PA (personal allowance) tui giải thích nốt lần này cho thuật ngữ này, lần sau thì phải tự hiểu}
{Ý nghĩa: Nếu partner xài chưa hết khoản PA thì có thể chuyển tối đa £1,260 cho người kia này, thực tế chỉ chuyển sang cho partner của mình được 1/5 thôi, lý do tránh lạm dụng, và cũng để khuyến khích cả hai vợ chồng đều nên đi làm để hưởng tối đa khoản trợ cấp.}
{Trong trường hợp khác Alec có net income = £12,000 chẳng hạn. Trong kế toán con số trong ngoặc đơn là số âm. (500) = - 500}
https://preview.redd.it/6xo61l952uzc1.png?width=566&format=png&auto=webp&s=10b98b8780218c828f10db319dcac8b932a94d8d
6 Gift aid
🔑 Gift aid: One-off and regular charitable gifts of money qualify for tax relief under the g*ift aid scheme *provided the donor gives the charity a gift aid declaration.(a) Basic rate A gift aid donation is treated as though it is paid net of basic rate tax (20%). This gives basic rate tax relief when the payment is made. For example, if the taxpayer wants the charity to receive a donation of £1,000, they would only need to make a payment to the charity of £800. The charity reclaims the 20% tax relief that the taxpayer has received, resulting in a gross gift of £1,000.
(b) Higher and additional rate Additional tax relief for higher rate and additional rate taxpayers is given in the personal tax computation by increasing the donor's basic rate limit and higher rate limit by the gross amount of the gift. To arrive at the gross amount of the gift you must multiply the amount paid (the net amount) by 100/80. In the above example, the gross amount would be the amount paid of £800 x 100/80 £1,000. The effect of increasing the basic rate limit is to increase the amount on which basic rate tax is payable. This is sometimes called 'extending the basic rate band." The effect of increasing the higher rate limit is simply to preserve the amount of taxable income on which higher rate tax is payable. No additional relief is due for basic rate taxpayers. Increasing the basic rate limit is irrelevant as taxable income is below this limit. The gross gift aid donation is also deducted from adjusted net income (ANI) for the purposes of tapering the personal allowance.
{Chánh phủ Anh tạo ra quy định này để khuyến khích “higher rate and additional rate taxpayers” làm từ thiện nhiều hơn vì họ sẽ hưởng ưu đãi về thuế. Còn ở VN thì gần như việc đóng góp từ thiện này ít khi mà taxpayer khai báo và cũng như tỷ lệ được hưởng ưu đãi cũng hông cao với tỷ lệ 1:1 [link]; không như Anh quốc là tỷ lệ 5:4}
https://preview.redd.it/4e7ts52l2uzc1.png?width=682&format=png&auto=webp&s=52d402c9cc3dc1bca905a73eea8b264c2c4e8fd2
{Theo như tui thấy tất cả các môn liên quan đến luật và quy định thì việc đọc lý thuyết là để nắm các thuật ngữ và định nghĩa. Còn muốn hiểu thì phải làm bài tập minh họa}
{W1, W2 viết tắt của từ Working 1,2 để giải thích con số từ đâu ra}
{Solution đã trình bài rõ rồi, điều mà tui nhấn mạnh cho các bạn thấy việc mà cô Magaretta góp £5,000 đã làm tăng Basic rate limit như công thức từ £37,700 to £43,950}
{Vậy nếu cổ hông nguyên góp từ thiện thì tax liability là nhiêu?
Solution
https://preview.redd.it/xd5b2f3o2uzc1.png?width=638&format=png&auto=webp&s=52cce7bc9706f7d7965bed19304c86d456818d07
{số chênh lệch = 33,382 - 32,132 = 1,250; 1,250/5,000 = 1/4.
Các bạn thấy đấy ở xứ tam quyền phân lập làm từ thiện được phước rồi còn được claim lại tiền thuế, góp £5,000 claim được £1,250}
7 Qualifying interest/qualifying loan
Interest paid gross on the following can be deducted from total income:(a) Loan to buy plant and machinery for use in a partnership or employment
(b) Loan to invest in partnership
(c) Loan to buy interest in employee-controlled company
(d) Loan to invest in a co-operative
For the purposes of TX, qualifying interest is deducted from non-savings income first, then from savings income and lastly from dividend income.
{Ở đây khi bạn cho người khác vay để lấy lãi thì thu nhập từ tiền lãi này sẽ được miễn thuế nếu các khoản cho vay đó thỏa mãn các điều kiện nêu trên}
{Một lần nữa các bạn thấy chính sách họ làm ra là để khuyến khích đầu tư}
8 Married couples and couples in a civil partnership
8.1 Spouses and civil partners
Spouses and civil partners are taxed as two separate people. Each spouse/civil partner is entitled to a personal allowance depending on their income. Spouses and civil partners should ensure, where possible, that each spouse/civil partner uses their main nil rate band, savings income nil rate band and dividend nil rate band (eg by transferring assets, bank accounts or shares).{Đoạn này để giải là khi tính thuế của vợ/chồng thuế suất của ai thì dùng của người đó. Nghĩa là chồng thu nhập cao, vợ nội trợ thu nhập thấp thì thu nhập của ai tới đâu sẽ có thuế suất tới đó, chứ hông gộp chung để làm thống kê. Đề cao tính cá nhân và bình đẳng trong cơ hội. Chứ hông như nước nào đó, hông biết từ lúc nào mà “thu nhập hộ gia đình” trở thành tiêu chí để thống kê}
https://preview.redd.it/tpaw0bqx2uzc1.png?width=625&format=png&auto=webp&s=23ca8a8a17970d9817fe81ab143df3d458f1ba8e
8.2 Jointly held property
Income from jointly held property is split 50:50 unless the couple make a joint declaration to HMRC specifying the actual proportions they are each entitled to.{Thu nhập từ tài sản chung thì chia đôi, chẳng hạn 2 vợ chồng có căn nhà cho thuê mua trong thời kỳ hôn nhân tạo ra thu nhập £48,000/năm thì đến khi tính thuế sẽ chia đôi. Cộng vào thêm thu nhập mỗi người £24,000}
9 Child benefit income tax charge
An income tax charge applies if a taxpayer receives child benefit (or their partner receives child benefit) and the taxpayer has adjusted net income over £50,000 in a tax year. Adjusted net income is defined in the same way as for the restriction of the PA described earlier in this chapter. The effect of the charge is to recover child benefit from taxpayers who have higher incomes.A 'partner' is a spouse, a civil partner, or an unmarried partner where the couple are living together as though they were married or were civil partners.
If the taxpayer has adjusted net income over £60,000, the charge is equal to the full amount of child benefit received. If the taxpayer has adjusted net income between £50,000 and £60,000, the charge is 1% of the child benefit amount for each £100 of adjusted net income in excess of £50,000. The calculation, at all stages, is rounded down to the nearest whole number.
If both partners have adjusted net income in excess of £50,000, the partner with the higher adjusted net income is liable for the charge.
https://preview.redd.it/1zix7on53uzc1.png?width=653&format=png&auto=webp&s=e3e9b4de3f9bb2852b2dcabdcbdf222a1eab511d
{Các bạn nhìn vào ảnh thấy “child benefit” £1,828. Tui xác nhận là có nhá, con số này thì tùy trường hợp, nhưng trong khuôn khổ môn F6 Taxation UK sẽ hông đào sâu. Và đây trợ cấp cho cha/mẹ có con nhỏ bằng cash (tiền mặt). Ngoài ra, các bạn hay nghe là ở xứ tam quyền phân lập trẻ em được ăn (bữa trưa) + học “miễn phí”, y tế “miễn phí” đúng hông? Hồi đó giờ nghe hông à chưa thấy bao giờ, tui cho các bạn thấy chuyện này là có thật, link. Dĩ nhiên nói miễn phí là chưa chính xác, nhưng chi phí đó là từ tiền thuế (nói chung) và thuế thu nhập mà nãy giờ chúng ta tính đấy.}
{Đọc tới đây tui biết nhiều bán sẽ muốn đi lắm rồi. Tốt thôi đi được cứ đi nhưng phải là hợp pháp mới được hưởng đi bất hợp pháp là phạm tội hình sự. Nhưng tui muốn nhấn mạnh cho các bạn biết VN có 100tr dân trừ 8tr ra thì còn 92tr, 92tr người này đâu thể nào đi hết được. Vậy nên đây là bài học mà tui muốn các bạn phải nhớ kỹ.}
10 Accrued income scheme
Gilts are securities issued by the UK Government as a way of borrowing money. Interest is paid to the holder of the gilt (the investor) in fixed amounts on fixed dates.The accrued income scheme ensures that a taxpayer who sells a gilt is taxed on any interest income included in the proceeds. Similarly, relief is given to the purchaser of the gilt for the interest included in the price paid.
As a forthcoming interest payment approaches the price of the gilt will start to increase. This is because a purchaser of the gilt will be entitled to the next interest payment, so the closer to the interest date we get the more expensive the gilt becomes as investors are willing to pay more for the gilt.
Usual income tax rules state that interest is taxable on individuals when it is received. However, where an individual holds gilts with a total nominal (face) value of more than £5,000 and sells the gilts for a price which includes interest, the amount of interest which has accrued since the last interest payment up to the date of the sale is taxed as savings income on the seller.
When the interest is paid to the buyer of the gilt, they are given tax relief by deducting the seller's accrued income.
{Gilt là trái phiếu chính phủ}
https://preview.redd.it/s31ual4g3uzc1.png?width=657&format=png&auto=webp&s=ac550d02103f10fbbf36e879d824e92c8d0b4357
Do đã post chỉ cho dán tối đa 20 ảnh. Vậy nên sang post sau mới so sánh thuế giũa VN và UK.
(còn tiếp)
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2024.05.11 19:43 Affectionatecvc 40% OFF Tempera Patio Market Outdoor Table Umbrella with Push Button- $54.98
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2024.05.11 19:43 Affectionatecvc 40% OFF Tempera Patio Market Outdoor Table Umbrella with Push Button- $54.98
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2024.05.11 18:56 EasOwned Well someone was clearly eager...
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2024.05.11 16:28 Nervous-Resolution-8 Yuriy Vernydub's Kryvbas has qualified for Europe after 24 years of waiting
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2024.05.11 10:40 ELECTROCUTE_MONKEYS Haha
I need a Deftones-themed Calamity Infernum playthrough with summoner class the ocky way from a dorky autistic puppyboy with round wireframe glasses under the Ohio Denny's covid patio table at 3 am while he vapes and is on his phone
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2024.05.11 02:20 megamunch One Year's Worth of Unsolicited St Pete Restaurant / Bar Reviews
Let's get it all out of the way up front. I know, no one asked. No one cares. What kind of A hole can afford to eat at all these places. Yada yada.
The fact is the culinary scene is changing by the month here in St Pete. I view this as a good thing. After reading the 100th question asking where to eat and drink around town I thought I would document some places I've been to around St Pete for those who are interested. I enjoy spending my finite disposable income and leisure time exploring local eats & drinks with good company.
I am in no way qualified to be providing these unsolicited opinions. My opinions are probably all over the place and inconsistent - some will speak to value and others quality. These are in no particular order. There are hardly any chains on this list - I would much rather support local spots. Ready? Let's go.
Three Birds Tavern: Love the vibe of the outside patio. They even have a British telephone booth out there. Solid tavern / bar food. The lamb burger is fantastic. Shepherd's pie is not bad. Servers are so nice and bubbly. Worth it for lunch or brunch. Martini deals on Thursdays (I think they're $5).
Pin on Cafe: My go to lunch spot. Unfortunately they are moving down central a mile but they have fantastic pad Thai and a great value lunch menu, where you can build your own meal. Probably eaten here 30 times. Very friendly staff.
Bodega: If you're into Cuban sammies (don't hurt me but they're not my favorite) then this is the place. I'm told they're fairly authentic. Good speakeasy in the back. More on that below.
Bohemios: New Spanish tapas restaurant off central. Don't let the lingering BurgerFi sign fool you - the food here is exceptional. A tad expensive but good quality. They have been slow since opening but the chef & servers are super nice and love chatting to patrons. The chef is an especially awesome dude and a fantastic cook. Got the lobster cargo, empanadas, flank steak, meatballs, and lamb lollipops. All bangin'.
Frog Pond: Great family spot for breakfast or lunch. No frills / nothing fancy, just a good familial vibe and frogs painted on the walls. Got the BLT and pancakes. Both yummy.
Lure: Pretty cool place, but I still can't figure out what their "thing" is. Is it a sports bar? Billiard Hall? Sushi bar? Apparently it's all three. Surprisingly solid food (including the sushi), good music, fun place to hang out with a big group of friends before a show at the Floridian. Great happy hour and food specials.
Lemongrass: Solid Thai food. Went here for a date, and while that didn't go super well the food was again solid. Not mind blowing. But solid. Did I mention it was solid?
Zaytoon Grill: I love Mediterranean food. I had a kefta kabob, hummus, rice, salad. I admittedly need to try it again. It was decent, I've had much better kabob. But again, want to give it another try. I ordered takeout so can't comment on the place itself but I hear the staff are great.
EngineNo9: I was told this was the "best burger in town". This is false. Well, maybe for the money it is. After having just about every burger on the menu, I can say without a doubt the best burger in town is in fact Left Bank Bistro's Burger. My gawd. I think they sprinkle crack in the brie they put on top. Anyway, this is engine9. If my expectations were lower initially I think I would recommend it as a value play. Good place to watch sports. Jambalaya is meh. Sriracha wings are delicious though. So are the tots.
Tony's Pizza: A very solid pizza place always slinging deals on door dash. They have nice wide, thin slices, similar to NY style.
Gateway Subs: really good subs and creative too. For instance, you can get crushed Doritos on your sammy.
Brooklyn South: Middle of the road sandwiches for the price.
Mangosteen: I've only gotten takeout and thought their sushi was decent. This place and Lure seemed similar in their food offerings. When I walk by the vibe looks pretty cool. They do BOGO deals on door dash too.
Maple Street Biscuit Co: The hangover cure you've been looking for. Great biscuits & gravy. They have this fried chicken biscuit with a pepper jelly type thing and it's... Hang on I need a minute... Utterly delicious. Instead of giving them your name when you order, they ask you a thought provoking question, which is kind of fun (e.g. who in all of history would you want to meet?).
11 Chicks: Great Venezuelan food. Get an arepa and some of those to die for deep fried cheese things. Don't sleep on the 11 Chicks bowl. A little pricey for chicken and rice but the quality is chef's kiss.
Fresh Kitchen: Decently healthy, solid food. Like a healthy chipotle. You're in and out of there fast. If you need a somewhat healthy $12 bowl go here. Also everyone who eats there is somehow a fitness model and/or gorgeous.
Pacific Counter: Also a decently healthy, solid fast casual place serving poke bowls. Staff is super nice. Bring your dog - they will spoil with salmon skin treats.
Hotdog Stand (8th & Central): I haven't caught her name, but she slings awesome street hotdogs and puts a lot of love into the fixings on top. Bring up the TB Lightning or bring your dog and you will be her favorite.
Pia's: I know, it's in Gulfport. Fantastic Italian food. Sit out on the patio if you can - there is a good red/white checkered tablecloth vibe out there. Saw someone get engaged there. It's that kind of place, immersive, familial, and delicious. The shank and lasagna were heavenly.
Paul's Landing: Worth it to check out the view of the pier and pool while at the Vinoy. Grab a drink and some very good American food here with a date, or for brunch.
Sauvignon Wine Locker: Pasta - yes. Wine - fuck yes. Half off bottle deals on Sunday I believe. Definitely a nicer place and a draw for the rich old snowbirds. I hear some local billionaires frequent the place. Kind of a cool entrance, walking down a (safe) alley before climbing the stairs to get to it.
Fortu: Clubby, upscale asian fusion spot. Expensive but also very good. The wagyu potstickers are great. Go here for date night and pay way too much for cool drinks and very good Asian food. But your body will be swaying from the music and sexy vibe.
Social Roost: Fun spot, feels kind of like you're walking into a Great Gatsby party. Creative and delicious dishes and the price is about right. It's loud and social and a high energy place so go with friends or a date on a Friday or Saturday.
Datz: Very solid bar / American / brunch food. I got a fried chicken salad and it was really good. I know there's more to try and I will do so.
Ford's Garage: Great burgers. If you're a car person, it's definitely worth checking out. Even the bathroom has a tire for a sink.
La V: Highly recommend this place. Vietnamese, French fusion. Good Pho, banh mi, and rolls. Get the beef bourgingon- like dish and soak up the broth with a toasty french baguette. Baby, you've got a stew goin'.
Calida: super small but absolutely delicious spot. A husband and wife cook and run the place, and they only have one other server who is equally awesome. They make you feel like family and live to serve people good food. Menu changes often based on ingredients that are in season. Had the short rib, Icelandic fish dish (forget the name), and duck panang. My gawd was it yummy. Great wine list too. Oh, they're only open three nights a week so make a rezzy in advance.
Bavaros: Pretty good pasta, a little pricey for the portion. Was a fan of Bolognese and penne vodka. Fun outdoor vibe with the sidewalk seating. Sometimes I'll bring carry out to cellarmasters.
Pizza Box: super tiny pizza spot but REALLY good meatballs and quality pizza made in a legit pizza oven. Get it with hot honey and a glass of wine.
Left Bank: Lit'rlly the best burger in town. The prices are exhorbinant for what you get, but the quality is hard to beat. $40 for beef bourgingon pissed me off, but again the food is really good. Go here for brunch and sip French rosé, get a croque madam, or take a date here for steak frites.
Il Ritorno: Upscale Italian. For the price, it was decent. Compared to olive garden it's excellent. Liked Bonu better. Pretty upscale spot for a date night. For the money, I think there are better spots. Please don't hurt me.
Bonu: Very refreshing vibe, open and airy and filled with cool lights and plants. Really good menu - lobster ravioli and penne vodka were great. Try some of their more creative dishes as well, you won't be disappointed.
Wild Child: I only went once for a date and I think we walked in after a fryer fire or something. Seriously, when we walked in we were assaulted with an intense funnel cake-like fryer smell and thin layer of smoke. Food was okay, I can't even remember what we got. I will agree to go back and try it again since I keep hearing good things and I'm pretty sure this was a one off experience. The date went well though. Not that you care.
Cassis: Solid French bistro with a restaurant and a quick eats side to it serving ice cream, chocolate, and pizza. Pretty banging.
Bella Brava: Great pizza! Was surprised how good since its in a touristy spot on Beach drive. Good pasta too. I think they have a good deal on Tuesdays or something.
Allelo: Upscale and very high quality Mediterranean food and wine list. Loved this place. Get the octopus, lamb Bolognese, and/or rabbit & glass of red and you won't be sorry.
Shrimp Store: Very good local, fresh seafood + rice, beans type place. Stop by for lunch and try the grouper. Fish & chips and hush puppies are great. Good prices too. Definitely good value.
Teak (Pier restaurant): I know the pier is touristy. But it's also gorgeous. The view of the water from the restaurant is unmatched. You can see Tampa Bay and st Pete skylines really well, watch the sailboats, and small planes fly by. The food is surprisingly good here. It's worth checking out even if you're a local.
Doc Ford's: I'd call this place upscale beach shack food. It's good quality, prices are slightly high as it is a more touristy spot on the pier. Good live music and good vibes.
Trophy Fish: I really enjoyed how fun and unique this place is. It's all outside but kind of covered, and really fun looking at night with all the lights and plants. Big bar you can sit around and you order seafood out of the truck/shack behind it. Have to say it was pretty expensive for what it was but definitely high quality.
The Studio Public House: Come here to see some great British rock and euro futbol memorabilia. Fish and chips are great, as is the shepherds pie.
Hook's on 9th: Sushi & Thai food with a great sushi menu. Great quality for not much money. $10 sushi and/or dishes for lunch. Get some takeout, try the beef bulgogi and a couple rolls. You won't be sorry.
Rumfish Grill (St Pete Beach): they have an awesome floor to ceiling aquarium right in the dining room. It's mesmerizing and a little bizarre watching the (huge) fish swim around while eating their cousin. Good seafood. Worth a visit.
Urban Stillhouse: Very upscale dining and I have to say the quality and experience were well worth the money. The building itself is unimpressive from the outside, yet when you walk in you are transported to the fanciest mountain / lodge / chalet type vibe you can think of. Multi level restaurant serving up great lamb, steak, and sides. Bonus points if you stop by Lolita's before.
Mazarros: A St Pete staple, and very crowded. But really good sandwiches made there and high quality Italian grocery options. Awesome wine room too - sometimes they do tastings. They do cooking classes here but haven't tried them yet. Worth checking out once, there's no place quite like it.
Lolita's: such a cool building they've moved in to, right next to the bike trail. Very artsy vibe since they share the space with Morean. Very creative dishes and cocktails, gorgeous patio on which to enjoy them.
Paradise Grill (pass-a-grille): the beach shack place right on the beach. I don't know how you can beat their grouper sammy, ice cold iced tea, and that beach view steps away from the water.
Ted Peter's: smoked fish isn't my favorite I admit, but even I liked it. I had some of their non-smoked fish and it was banging. Ask to go see where the smoking is done next door, it's a unique way they cook fish there. Been around for 80+ years.
Poppos : I live nearby and have been here a few times. Was described to me as a "local chipotle". I really wanted to like it. It's average. The portions are small for what you pay for. Their bowls, like literally the paper bowl itself, has a huge indent and is raised from the bottom so it fits a lot less food than you'd think. Staff was super kind though.
Drinks/Bar Only:
Intermezzo: This is the date night spot. Lots of love put into each drink. Nice jazz music. Visiting during Christmas is a must as they deck the place out. They're moving right nearby in the coming months.
Cellarmasters: My favorite watering hole in town. By now you know I enjoy wine. This place isn't your typical wine bar - it's divey, hipster, and awesome. Bring a sub or takeout here and listen to the incredibly cool wine staff pick and pour you the perfect glass. They have a great selection of old world for $20-40 a bottle.
No Vacancy: Outdoor Clubby place, usually a good spot for a DJ and to rip shots / crash bachelor or bachelorette parties.
Steve's: cash only no frills/old school bar. Go grab a bud light in a bottle and roll with the sticky floors. A staple on central ave that's been there forever.
Tryst: Decent bar. Had a boat load of tequila there.
The Landing: Pre or post Jannus show it's a must to continue your high octane weekend night with music and dancing. Bathroom lines get real long so wear a diaper or get in line early. Or try to bribe others in line with a fiver.
Bar Chica: If you like craft cocktails, it's a must visit. Classy bar slinging really cool drinks. You walk thru Bodega to get to it.
Lost and Found: Great spot for a drink and live music. Food truck and big backyard to enjoy a drink under the stars. They were playing Terminator 2 on the TV there which shows you how cool the place is.
Enigma: I typically see this suggested (as a joke) to out of towners asking for a low-key place to have a drink. Well, joke's on them. Enigma is so fun. It is a gay bar, but assuming you're progressive enough to deal with that the drinks, music, dancing, and people are fantastic.
It's all culminated in this. My favorite restaurant in town. Bin6South! ... You will spend $100+ and still walk out hungry. It is not a value play. It is a quality play. There are only 6 barstools and one table fitting 6 people. Reservations are not easy to come by. This place is the product of a retired couple who wanted to make awesome food, pour good wine, and have a communal feel for locals. It's not for everyone. But if you like a chef's table vibe, try it. You can shoot the shit with the chef, owner, and sommelier while they serve you amazing food you've never tried and pour you delicious wine. Their venison and pork shoulder are banging. They also have lots of fun culinary and wine events so check that out.
If you like coffee, the following places are a must try for either the quality of their espresso, local art, and/or vibe:
The Shop & Coffee House
Black crow
Intermezzo
Book & Bottle
Kawha
Bad mother
Fray's donut house for donuts and breakfast sammies too
Bonus Tampa restaurants:
Oxford Exchange: A Harry Potter feeling to it with good brunch food. It has a library quality to it, you feel like British royalty eating here. Great place for a cheeky day glass of rosé or bubbly. Take a walk along the river walk before or after.
Berns: A must try. It's been there for 80+ years. The building itself has such cool decorations and pictures on the walls, and each room has a different theme. While their steak is just okay, for the price comes with French onion soup and onion straws. The best part of Bern's is their wine list. My gawd. They have over 500,000 bottles on site and more in their other building / cellar. I think it's the largest restaurant owned wine collection in the world. Because there are so many bottles, they often can't keep up with pricing for all of them. We got three different bottles from 1975 - 1987 for under $50 each. Their dessert room, cellar tour, and kitchen tours are a must. Check out my post history as I have something in there from the wine subreddit.
Oh and not in Tampa but best Chinese food around is Zom Hee in Seminole. Get their NY strip dish. It's banging. Cool old school spot.
Places I want to try: Rococo, Beau & Mo's, El Cap, Cappy's, Harvey's, Sammy's, Hookin' Ain't Easy, The Chattaway, Brick & Mortar, naked farmer, violet stone, Jack's London Grille, Bascoms, food trucks (Go Stuff Yourself), Nueva Cantina's fundido burger, eat art love, German Knodle, Ceviche, The Burg, Sara's Kebab House, Baba / Barbouni
Agree? Disagree? Any other places you'd add to the list? I will likely keep editing this post as other places pop in my mind that I've forgotten, and/or I eat somewhere new. Cheers.
submitted by megamunch to StPetersburgFL [link] [comments]
The fact is the culinary scene is changing by the month here in St Pete. I view this as a good thing. After reading the 100th question asking where to eat and drink around town I thought I would document some places I've been to around St Pete for those who are interested. I enjoy spending my finite disposable income and leisure time exploring local eats & drinks with good company.
I am in no way qualified to be providing these unsolicited opinions. My opinions are probably all over the place and inconsistent - some will speak to value and others quality. These are in no particular order. There are hardly any chains on this list - I would much rather support local spots. Ready? Let's go.
Pin on Cafe: My go to lunch spot. Unfortunately they are moving down central a mile but they have fantastic pad Thai and a great value lunch menu, where you can build your own meal. Probably eaten here 30 times. Very friendly staff.
Bodega: If you're into Cuban sammies (don't hurt me but they're not my favorite) then this is the place. I'm told they're fairly authentic. Good speakeasy in the back. More on that below.
Bohemios: New Spanish tapas restaurant off central. Don't let the lingering BurgerFi sign fool you - the food here is exceptional. A tad expensive but good quality. They have been slow since opening but the chef & servers are super nice and love chatting to patrons. The chef is an especially awesome dude and a fantastic cook. Got the lobster cargo, empanadas, flank steak, meatballs, and lamb lollipops. All bangin'.
Frog Pond: Great family spot for breakfast or lunch. No frills / nothing fancy, just a good familial vibe and frogs painted on the walls. Got the BLT and pancakes. Both yummy.
Lure: Pretty cool place, but I still can't figure out what their "thing" is. Is it a sports bar? Billiard Hall? Sushi bar? Apparently it's all three. Surprisingly solid food (including the sushi), good music, fun place to hang out with a big group of friends before a show at the Floridian. Great happy hour and food specials.
Lemongrass: Solid Thai food. Went here for a date, and while that didn't go super well the food was again solid. Not mind blowing. But solid. Did I mention it was solid?
Zaytoon Grill: I love Mediterranean food. I had a kefta kabob, hummus, rice, salad. I admittedly need to try it again. It was decent, I've had much better kabob. But again, want to give it another try. I ordered takeout so can't comment on the place itself but I hear the staff are great.
EngineNo9: I was told this was the "best burger in town". This is false. Well, maybe for the money it is. After having just about every burger on the menu, I can say without a doubt the best burger in town is in fact Left Bank Bistro's Burger. My gawd. I think they sprinkle crack in the brie they put on top. Anyway, this is engine9. If my expectations were lower initially I think I would recommend it as a value play. Good place to watch sports. Jambalaya is meh. Sriracha wings are delicious though. So are the tots.
Tony's Pizza: A very solid pizza place always slinging deals on door dash. They have nice wide, thin slices, similar to NY style.
Gateway Subs: really good subs and creative too. For instance, you can get crushed Doritos on your sammy.
Brooklyn South: Middle of the road sandwiches for the price.
Mangosteen: I've only gotten takeout and thought their sushi was decent. This place and Lure seemed similar in their food offerings. When I walk by the vibe looks pretty cool. They do BOGO deals on door dash too.
Maple Street Biscuit Co: The hangover cure you've been looking for. Great biscuits & gravy. They have this fried chicken biscuit with a pepper jelly type thing and it's... Hang on I need a minute... Utterly delicious. Instead of giving them your name when you order, they ask you a thought provoking question, which is kind of fun (e.g. who in all of history would you want to meet?).
11 Chicks: Great Venezuelan food. Get an arepa and some of those to die for deep fried cheese things. Don't sleep on the 11 Chicks bowl. A little pricey for chicken and rice but the quality is chef's kiss.
Fresh Kitchen: Decently healthy, solid food. Like a healthy chipotle. You're in and out of there fast. If you need a somewhat healthy $12 bowl go here. Also everyone who eats there is somehow a fitness model and/or gorgeous.
Pacific Counter: Also a decently healthy, solid fast casual place serving poke bowls. Staff is super nice. Bring your dog - they will spoil with salmon skin treats.
Hotdog Stand (8th & Central): I haven't caught her name, but she slings awesome street hotdogs and puts a lot of love into the fixings on top. Bring up the TB Lightning or bring your dog and you will be her favorite.
Pia's: I know, it's in Gulfport. Fantastic Italian food. Sit out on the patio if you can - there is a good red/white checkered tablecloth vibe out there. Saw someone get engaged there. It's that kind of place, immersive, familial, and delicious. The shank and lasagna were heavenly.
Paul's Landing: Worth it to check out the view of the pier and pool while at the Vinoy. Grab a drink and some very good American food here with a date, or for brunch.
Sauvignon Wine Locker: Pasta - yes. Wine - fuck yes. Half off bottle deals on Sunday I believe. Definitely a nicer place and a draw for the rich old snowbirds. I hear some local billionaires frequent the place. Kind of a cool entrance, walking down a (safe) alley before climbing the stairs to get to it.
Fortu: Clubby, upscale asian fusion spot. Expensive but also very good. The wagyu potstickers are great. Go here for date night and pay way too much for cool drinks and very good Asian food. But your body will be swaying from the music and sexy vibe.
Social Roost: Fun spot, feels kind of like you're walking into a Great Gatsby party. Creative and delicious dishes and the price is about right. It's loud and social and a high energy place so go with friends or a date on a Friday or Saturday.
Datz: Very solid bar / American / brunch food. I got a fried chicken salad and it was really good. I know there's more to try and I will do so.
Ford's Garage: Great burgers. If you're a car person, it's definitely worth checking out. Even the bathroom has a tire for a sink.
La V: Highly recommend this place. Vietnamese, French fusion. Good Pho, banh mi, and rolls. Get the beef bourgingon- like dish and soak up the broth with a toasty french baguette. Baby, you've got a stew goin'.
Calida: super small but absolutely delicious spot. A husband and wife cook and run the place, and they only have one other server who is equally awesome. They make you feel like family and live to serve people good food. Menu changes often based on ingredients that are in season. Had the short rib, Icelandic fish dish (forget the name), and duck panang. My gawd was it yummy. Great wine list too. Oh, they're only open three nights a week so make a rezzy in advance.
Bavaros: Pretty good pasta, a little pricey for the portion. Was a fan of Bolognese and penne vodka. Fun outdoor vibe with the sidewalk seating. Sometimes I'll bring carry out to cellarmasters.
Pizza Box: super tiny pizza spot but REALLY good meatballs and quality pizza made in a legit pizza oven. Get it with hot honey and a glass of wine.
Left Bank: Lit'rlly the best burger in town. The prices are exhorbinant for what you get, but the quality is hard to beat. $40 for beef bourgingon pissed me off, but again the food is really good. Go here for brunch and sip French rosé, get a croque madam, or take a date here for steak frites.
Il Ritorno: Upscale Italian. For the price, it was decent. Compared to olive garden it's excellent. Liked Bonu better. Pretty upscale spot for a date night. For the money, I think there are better spots. Please don't hurt me.
Bonu: Very refreshing vibe, open and airy and filled with cool lights and plants. Really good menu - lobster ravioli and penne vodka were great. Try some of their more creative dishes as well, you won't be disappointed.
Wild Child: I only went once for a date and I think we walked in after a fryer fire or something. Seriously, when we walked in we were assaulted with an intense funnel cake-like fryer smell and thin layer of smoke. Food was okay, I can't even remember what we got. I will agree to go back and try it again since I keep hearing good things and I'm pretty sure this was a one off experience. The date went well though. Not that you care.
Cassis: Solid French bistro with a restaurant and a quick eats side to it serving ice cream, chocolate, and pizza. Pretty banging.
Bella Brava: Great pizza! Was surprised how good since its in a touristy spot on Beach drive. Good pasta too. I think they have a good deal on Tuesdays or something.
Allelo: Upscale and very high quality Mediterranean food and wine list. Loved this place. Get the octopus, lamb Bolognese, and/or rabbit & glass of red and you won't be sorry.
Shrimp Store: Very good local, fresh seafood + rice, beans type place. Stop by for lunch and try the grouper. Fish & chips and hush puppies are great. Good prices too. Definitely good value.
Teak (Pier restaurant): I know the pier is touristy. But it's also gorgeous. The view of the water from the restaurant is unmatched. You can see Tampa Bay and st Pete skylines really well, watch the sailboats, and small planes fly by. The food is surprisingly good here. It's worth checking out even if you're a local.
Doc Ford's: I'd call this place upscale beach shack food. It's good quality, prices are slightly high as it is a more touristy spot on the pier. Good live music and good vibes.
Trophy Fish: I really enjoyed how fun and unique this place is. It's all outside but kind of covered, and really fun looking at night with all the lights and plants. Big bar you can sit around and you order seafood out of the truck/shack behind it. Have to say it was pretty expensive for what it was but definitely high quality.
The Studio Public House: Come here to see some great British rock and euro futbol memorabilia. Fish and chips are great, as is the shepherds pie.
Hook's on 9th: Sushi & Thai food with a great sushi menu. Great quality for not much money. $10 sushi and/or dishes for lunch. Get some takeout, try the beef bulgogi and a couple rolls. You won't be sorry.
Rumfish Grill (St Pete Beach): they have an awesome floor to ceiling aquarium right in the dining room. It's mesmerizing and a little bizarre watching the (huge) fish swim around while eating their cousin. Good seafood. Worth a visit.
Urban Stillhouse: Very upscale dining and I have to say the quality and experience were well worth the money. The building itself is unimpressive from the outside, yet when you walk in you are transported to the fanciest mountain / lodge / chalet type vibe you can think of. Multi level restaurant serving up great lamb, steak, and sides. Bonus points if you stop by Lolita's before.
Mazarros: A St Pete staple, and very crowded. But really good sandwiches made there and high quality Italian grocery options. Awesome wine room too - sometimes they do tastings. They do cooking classes here but haven't tried them yet. Worth checking out once, there's no place quite like it.
Lolita's: such a cool building they've moved in to, right next to the bike trail. Very artsy vibe since they share the space with Morean. Very creative dishes and cocktails, gorgeous patio on which to enjoy them.
Paradise Grill (pass-a-grille): the beach shack place right on the beach. I don't know how you can beat their grouper sammy, ice cold iced tea, and that beach view steps away from the water.
Ted Peter's: smoked fish isn't my favorite I admit, but even I liked it. I had some of their non-smoked fish and it was banging. Ask to go see where the smoking is done next door, it's a unique way they cook fish there. Been around for 80+ years.
Poppos : I live nearby and have been here a few times. Was described to me as a "local chipotle". I really wanted to like it. It's average. The portions are small for what you pay for. Their bowls, like literally the paper bowl itself, has a huge indent and is raised from the bottom so it fits a lot less food than you'd think. Staff was super kind though.
Drinks/Bar Only:
Intermezzo: This is the date night spot. Lots of love put into each drink. Nice jazz music. Visiting during Christmas is a must as they deck the place out. They're moving right nearby in the coming months.
Cellarmasters: My favorite watering hole in town. By now you know I enjoy wine. This place isn't your typical wine bar - it's divey, hipster, and awesome. Bring a sub or takeout here and listen to the incredibly cool wine staff pick and pour you the perfect glass. They have a great selection of old world for $20-40 a bottle.
No Vacancy: Outdoor Clubby place, usually a good spot for a DJ and to rip shots / crash bachelor or bachelorette parties.
Steve's: cash only no frills/old school bar. Go grab a bud light in a bottle and roll with the sticky floors. A staple on central ave that's been there forever.
Tryst: Decent bar. Had a boat load of tequila there.
The Landing: Pre or post Jannus show it's a must to continue your high octane weekend night with music and dancing. Bathroom lines get real long so wear a diaper or get in line early. Or try to bribe others in line with a fiver.
Bar Chica: If you like craft cocktails, it's a must visit. Classy bar slinging really cool drinks. You walk thru Bodega to get to it.
Lost and Found: Great spot for a drink and live music. Food truck and big backyard to enjoy a drink under the stars. They were playing Terminator 2 on the TV there which shows you how cool the place is.
Enigma: I typically see this suggested (as a joke) to out of towners asking for a low-key place to have a drink. Well, joke's on them. Enigma is so fun. It is a gay bar, but assuming you're progressive enough to deal with that the drinks, music, dancing, and people are fantastic.
It's all culminated in this. My favorite restaurant in town. Bin6South! ... You will spend $100+ and still walk out hungry. It is not a value play. It is a quality play. There are only 6 barstools and one table fitting 6 people. Reservations are not easy to come by. This place is the product of a retired couple who wanted to make awesome food, pour good wine, and have a communal feel for locals. It's not for everyone. But if you like a chef's table vibe, try it. You can shoot the shit with the chef, owner, and sommelier while they serve you amazing food you've never tried and pour you delicious wine. Their venison and pork shoulder are banging. They also have lots of fun culinary and wine events so check that out.
If you like coffee, the following places are a must try for either the quality of their espresso, local art, and/or vibe:
The Shop & Coffee House
Black crow
Intermezzo
Book & Bottle
Kawha
Bad mother
Fray's donut house for donuts and breakfast sammies too
Bonus Tampa restaurants:
Oxford Exchange: A Harry Potter feeling to it with good brunch food. It has a library quality to it, you feel like British royalty eating here. Great place for a cheeky day glass of rosé or bubbly. Take a walk along the river walk before or after.
Berns: A must try. It's been there for 80+ years. The building itself has such cool decorations and pictures on the walls, and each room has a different theme. While their steak is just okay, for the price comes with French onion soup and onion straws. The best part of Bern's is their wine list. My gawd. They have over 500,000 bottles on site and more in their other building / cellar. I think it's the largest restaurant owned wine collection in the world. Because there are so many bottles, they often can't keep up with pricing for all of them. We got three different bottles from 1975 - 1987 for under $50 each. Their dessert room, cellar tour, and kitchen tours are a must. Check out my post history as I have something in there from the wine subreddit.
Oh and not in Tampa but best Chinese food around is Zom Hee in Seminole. Get their NY strip dish. It's banging. Cool old school spot.
Places I want to try: Rococo, Beau & Mo's, El Cap, Cappy's, Harvey's, Sammy's, Hookin' Ain't Easy, The Chattaway, Brick & Mortar, naked farmer, violet stone, Jack's London Grille, Bascoms, food trucks (Go Stuff Yourself), Nueva Cantina's fundido burger, eat art love, German Knodle, Ceviche, The Burg, Sara's Kebab House, Baba / Barbouni
Agree? Disagree? Any other places you'd add to the list? I will likely keep editing this post as other places pop in my mind that I've forgotten, and/or I eat somewhere new. Cheers.
2024.05.11 02:03 next3days Weekend Lineup of Events with Graduation & Mother's Day.....
First, congratulations to all the new Hokie graduates! And, Happy Mother's Day to all the mom's in town. With that said, here's a rundown of weekend fun you can enjoy in Blacksburg and across the New River Valley whether your a new grad, mom or just hanging out in the Burg.
Weekend Rundown of Fun: 1. 2024 Spring Carnival Friday, May 10, 2024, 5:00 - 11:00 PM, Saturday, May 11, 2024, 1:00 - 11:00 PM, Sunday, May 12, 2024, 1:00 - 10:00 PM Admission: Free Ride Tickets: $1.25 each and each ride takes multiple tickets, Unlimited Ride Wristbands: $25.00 per session Uptown Christiansburg (formerly New River Valley Mall) presents the 2024 Spring Carnival from Cole Shows Amusement Company starting on Thursday, May 2, 2024 continuing through Sunday, May 12, 2024. Enjoy amusement park rides, game booths, food and fun for the whole family. There is no gate fee. Unlimited wristbands are valid for one session which is 5:00-11:00 PM on Monday-Friday and either 1:00-6:00 PM or 5:00 PM to Close on Saturday and Sunday. Note: Hours are weather dependent. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777014
2. Throwback Double Feature: Shrek and Shrek 2 Starlite Drive-In Theatre, Christiansburg Friday, May 10, 2024 and Saturday, May 11, 2024, 8:30 - 11:40 PM Adults: $10.00, Kids Ages 6-12: $6.00, Kids Ages 5 & Under: Free The Starlite Drive-In Theatre presents a Throwback Double Feature featuring "Shrek" and "Shrek 2". "Shrek" is a 2001 animated film and "Shrek 2" is a 2004 animated film. Both films star the voices of Mike Myers, Eddie Murphy, and Cameron Diaz and are rated PG. Gates open at 6:30 PM and the first movie is expected to start around 8:30 PM. Concessions will be available for purchase. Cash or card accepted. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777372
3. College Baseball: Miami vs. Virginia Tech English Field, Virginia Tech Friday, May 10, 2024, 7:00 PM, Saturday, May 11, 2024, 7:00 PM, Sunday, May 12, 2024, 1:00 PM General Public: $10.00, Youth: $5.00 Watch the Virginia Tech Baseball Team compete against ACC conference opponent Miami in their three-game home series. Saturday will serve as Senior Day for all the senior Hokie players with a pre-game ceremony. On Sunday, there will be a special giveaway featuring flowers for all the mothers. It's also the Freshmen Class Trading Card Giveaway with post-game autographs with the freshmen class players, weather permitting. There will also be a Post-game Kids Run the Bases opportunity, weather permitting. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=776512
4. The Red Ferns and Smooth Brain in Concert The Milk Parlor, Blacksburg Friday, May 10, 2024, 8:30 PM - 12:00 AM Admission: $5.00 The Red Ferns is a groovy guitar band and Smooth Brain is a four-piece rock band. Both band are from Blacksburg, VA. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777365 5. Blacksburg Farmers Market with Music from Fats Holler Market Square Park, Blacksburg Saturday, May 11, 2024, 8:00 AM - 2:00 PM Admission: Free The Blacksburg Farmers Market offers local meats, organic produce, baked goods, crafts, flowers and more in the heart of downtown Blacksburg. Fats Holler will performer from 9:30-11:30 AM. Fats Holler is a new group, formed in 2022, of seasoned musicians from the New River Valley. Having a repertoire primarily of music from the 1910's-1930's, they are bringing the sounds of old New Orleans to Southwest Virginia. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777386
6. Scottish Highland Games Clinic YMCA of Pulaski County, Pulaski Saturday, May 11, 2024, 9:00 AM - 2:00 PM Admission: $25.00 Join the YMCA's very own instructor and professional Highland Game athlete Jonathan Harding to learn what it takes to compete in your first Highland Games. The goal of this event is to cover all nine events during the clinic. Jonathan was invited to the World Highland Games in 2023 and finished 7th overall! All skill levels welcome. Whether you are a beginner or a Highland Game athlete looking to improve on your technique, there will be something to gain. All proceeds from this clinic will go support the the YMCA's 2024 Highland Games Competition. For ages 15 and up. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777406
7. 2024 New River Valley Master Gardener Association Plant Sale Montgomery County Government Center, Christiansburg Saturday, May 11, 2024, 9:00 AM - 2:00 PM Admission: Free The New River Valley Master Gardener Association (NRVMGA) Plant Sale will be offering native plants, vegetables, annuals, herb, perennials, trees, shrubs and house plants. Many plants are grown by NRVMGA members and others are donated by retailers, individuals and organizations from throughout the area. There will also be a "garden supply/treasure area" with gardening related items for sale. The Plant Clinic will be on-site to answer your questions, problem plant issues, or gardening concerns. There will also be a selection of free seeds to give away to help support pollinators in our area. All proceeds fund our Community Grants Program which provides funding for educational gardening projects throughout the New River Valley. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=776743
8. Mustangs of the New River Valley Car Show Clayton Homes of Dublin, Dublin Saturday, May 11, 2024, 9:00 AM - 3:00 PM Admission: Free Clayton Homes of Dublin presents Mustangs of the New River Valley Car Show and a chance to check out their homes. Enjoy the Countryman Jamaican Grill food truck, sweet rides, and fun for the whole family. Plus, there will be trophies for the car show contestants with the best classic mustang, best modern mustang, and best overall. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777371
9. Spring Fever Handcrafted Market Glencoe Mansion, Museum & Gallery, Radford Saturday, May 11, 2024, 10:00 AM - 3:00 PM Admission: Free Shop local and handmade at the Spring Fever Handcrafted Market. Enjoy shopping with 20+ unique & one-of-a-kind artisans, makers, and modern crafters as well as food & dessert vendors including the Radford High School Performing Arts who will be holding a Snacks & Sodas fundraiser for guests. Make sure to visit the Glencoe Mansion Gift Shop, which is also home to unique handcrafted goods & Radford themed souvenirs. Glencoe Museum will be open until 4:00 PM. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=776736
10. 2024 Spring Open House P. Buckley Moss Gallery, Blacksburg Saturday, May 11, 2024, 11:00 AM - 4:00 PM and Sunday, May 12, 2024, 12:00 - 3:00 PM Admission: Free Meet the artist P Buckley Moss herself as we introduce her latest edition "Changing the Future" depicting the newest Corps of Cadet Buildings on the Virginia Tech Campus. Come in and celebrate her 91st year! the gallery will have a large selection of university themed prints and original watercolours for your graduating seniors as well as something for everyone in the family. Make sure to put your name in the hat for our P Buckley Moss Gift basket which will be drawn on Sunday at 3:00 PM. Parking is available on the street and in the city lot across from the gallery as well as in the Kent Square parking garage. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=776766
11. Carriage Rides for Mother's Day Draper Mercantile and Trading Company, Draper Saturday, May 11, 2024, 11:00 AM - 3:00 PM and Sunday, May 12, 2024, 2:00 - 6:00 PM Carriage Rides: $20.00 Take a charming carriage ride around Draper Mercantile's picturesque village and create memories that will last a lifetime from Suthers Carriage Company. Perfect for capturing those special moments with Mom. Additionally, indulge in our delectable new food and beverage items specially curated for the month of May. Online reservations are available. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777395
12. Earth Day - We Didn't Miss It! JBR Vineyards LLC, Pearisburg Saturday, May 11, 2024, 12:00 - 5:00 PM and Sunday, May 12, 2024, 1:00 - 5:00 PM Admission: Free Wine Pricing: Tasting: $5.00, Glass of Wine: $5.00, Bottles of Wine: $15.00-$20.00 plus tax Every day is earth day at JBR Vineyards. They take very good care of their vines because planet Earth is the only planet with wine. See our vineyard and taste wines from grapes rarely grown in Virginia. Remember to celebrate with your graduate and bring mom on her special day. Dogs and kids welcome. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777282
13. Free Outdoor Acroyoga Class and Jam Henderson Lawn, Virginia Tech Saturday, May 11, 2024, 1:00 - 3:00 PM Admission: Free In Balance Yoga presents a Free Outdoor Acroyoga Class and Jam. Learn about the playful practice of Acroyoga in a safe environment. No experience or partner is necessary. This free event will consist of one hour guided learning, and one hour of free form jam time. In case of rain, the rain location will be In Balance Yoga at their 1512 North Main Street location. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777118
14. Mount Tabor Ruritan Club's 2024 Fish Fry Kickoff with DJ Earl Brown Slusser's Chapel Church of God, Blacksburg In Person: Adults: $12.00, Children Ages 3-11: $6.00, Children Under 3: Free, Carry-Outs: $12.00 The Mount Tabor Ruritan Club presents their 2024 Fish Fry Kickoff and May event under the picnic shelter below the lower church parking lot. Enjoy a serving fish, fries, slaw, homemade desserts, and beverage. DJ Earl Brown will be spinning some hits to get the 2024 fry season off to a swinging start. This is a fundraiser for the Ruritan Club's community service projects and scholarships. The event will be held rain or shine. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=776749
15. 2024 Rockin' Main Street Concert Series Kickoff with The Jared Stout Band and Noah Spencer Downtown Christiansburg, Christiansburg Saturday, May 11, 2024, 5:00 - 9:00 PM Admission: Free The Town of Christiansburg and the Christiansburg Parks & Rec kicks off their 2024 Rockin' Main Street Concert Series featuring music from The Jared Stout Band and Noah Spencer. Celebrate food and music in downtown Christiansburg. Attendees can purchase food and drinks from a selection of food trucks and wine & beer vendors. Get ready to experience the high-octane energy and soulful sound of the Jared Stout Band. This alt-country powerhouse hails from Southwestern Virginia and is known for their unique blend of Appalachian rhythm and blues. As runners-up for the "On-The-Rise" award at FloydFest 22, the Jared Stout Band delivers an unforgettable performance by bringing their own energetic and soulful original songs to the stage. Noah Spencer is an up and coming musician from Richlands in Southwest Virginia. He brings a genuine passion to the stage with a voice that's both soft and smooth, but also gritty and soulful. His shows cover a wide range of styles from country to rock, Americana, pop, and gospel. He enjoys singing and playing guitar, drums, piano and the ukulele. Noah was also a contestant and starred on NBC's "The Voice" in Season 24 advancing to the playoff rounds. Please bring your IDs if you would like to purchase beer or wine. Tables and chairs will be set up along Main Street. However, attendants are encouraged to bring lawn chairs to sit at the square and watch the live music. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=776697
16. 2024 Bluegrass and Baseball Benefit with Lonesome River Band, Gold Rush and Hot Dog Supper Newport Community Center, Newport Saturday, May 11, 2024, 5:30 - 9:30 PM Admission: $25.00 Enjoy a night of legendary bluegrass music with nationally known bluegrass artists the Lonesome River Band along with opener and Giles County's own Gold Rush to support the youth baseball and softball programs in the Newport community starting at 7:00 PM at the 3rd Annual Bluegrass and Baseball Benefit. A hotdog supper will precede the event starting at 5:30 PM in the cafeteria along with a raffle which will include a banjo autographed by both the Lonesome River Band and Gold Rush as well as other items. Lonesome River Band continues their reputation as one of the most respected names in bluegrass music. Led by five-time International Bluegrass Music Association (IBMA) Banjo Player of the Year and Virginia Country Music Hall of Famer Sammy Shelor, the group holds a powerhouse line up of award-winning players. In 2023, over 150 kids participated on teams based in Newport. This concert helps provide essential funding for uniforms, equipment, practice space, and experiences for players age 3-16. Donations are always welcome to the Newport Sports Booster Club, a registered 501c3 organization. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777383
17. Irish Trad Jam with Mist on the Mountain Rising Silo Farm Brewery, Blacksburg Saturday, May 11, 2024, 6:00 - 9:00 PM Admission: Free Mist on the Mountain is an Irish Traditional Music group based in the New River Valley. From lively jigs and reels to heartbreaking laments and rollicking ballads, Mist on the Mountain provides great Irish music for any occasion. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777070
18. Father Sun in Concert Dogtown Roadhouse, Floyd Saturday, May 11, 2024, 8:00 - 11:00 PM Admission: Free Father Sun embodies the true spirit of reggae with a blend of experienced artistry and youthful energy. Father Sun’s repertoire encompasses reggae covers and original compositions, each note carrying the authentic vibe of the genre. Their performances are not mere musical exhibitions; they are heartfelt celebrations of life and the universal language of music. Join Father Sun on their musical odyssey, where the essence of reggae is embraced and shared, connecting soul and spreading positivity wherever their music is heard. Laying the bassline of this musical journey is Janiah Allen, a seasoned musician known for his collaborations with Alliens, Music Road Co, Solazo, Jordan Harman & the Humble Brags, Sol Roots and The Ambassador. Alongside Janiah is his son, Nyo Allen, whose exceptional drumming skills bring life to Father Sun’s beats. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777370
19. Mother's Day Brunch Buffet Our Daily Bread Bakery & Bistro, Blacksburg Sunday, May 12, 2024, 9:00 AM - 2:00 PM, Adults: $35.00, Kids: $17.00 The Mother's Day Brunch Buffet Menu includes: Herb Roasted Prime Rib, Spiral Ham, Salmon with Lemon and Dill, Sausage & Ham Strata, Mushroom, Spinach & Gruyere Strata, Herb Roasted Garlic Potatoes, French Toast Casserole, Maple Chicken Sausage Links, Scrambled Eggs, Assorted Breads and Pastry and more. Tax and gratuity not included. No reservations. The buffet is first come, first serve. Mimosas, espresso and more will be available a la carte. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=775117
20. Mother's Day Brunch Buffet Bull & Bones Brewhaus & Grill, Blacksburg Sunday, May 12, 2024, 11:00 AM - 3:00 PM Adults: $35.00, Kids 6-12: $10.00, Ages 5 & Under: Free Bull & Bones Brewhaus & Grill presents a Mother's Day Brunch Buffet. The Mother's Day Brunch Buffet Menu entrees include Smoked Salmon with Dill, Sliced Grilled Loin Steak, French Toast with Syrup and Fruit Compote, Biscuits and Sausage Gravy, Smoked Ribs and Pork & Brisket among others along with sides and Strawberry Shortcake with Whipped Cream Price fr dessert. The buffet includes coffee, juice and condiments. Reservations are available via email.Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=775100
21. Mother's Day Celebration with Music from Leslie Brooks Moon Hollow Brewing, Blacksburg Sunday, May 12, 2024, 2:00 - 8:00 PM Admission: Free Musician Leslie Brooks will be performing on the patio from 4:00-7:00 PM, slushies will be available from 2:00-8:00 PM for a special Mother's Day Slushie Sunday and Driftwood Catering food truck will be on site. Leslie Brooks is a singer-songwriter, performing solo with guitar, playing jazz, folk, blues, rockin' country and popular favorites originally. She has played the best venues in a 16-state area, as well as in Norway and Monte Carlo. Opened for Heart, James Taylor, Bob Margolin and Willie Nelson to name a few. Latitude-Permanent Jewelry Co. will also be on site doing permanent jewelry from 3:00-7:00 PM. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777369
22. Author Night with Justin Nobel Blacksburg Books, Blacksburg Sunday, May 12, 2024, 5:00 - 6:30 PM Admission: Free Blacksburg Books presents an Author Night with Justin Nobel and his special guest Pierson Keating. Justin Nobel will share findings from his book "Petroleum-238" which is an acclaimed science journalist’s extraordinary seven-year investigation into how the U.S. oil and gas industry has avoided environmental regulations and created a dangerous and radioactive public health crisis. Nobel relies on oilfield workers, community activists, a century of academic research, and a trove of never-before released industry and government documents to lay out a series of game-changing reveals into the world’s most powerful industry. Justin Nobel writes on science and environment for US magazines, investigative sites, and literary journals. His work has been published in Best American Science and Nature Writing and Best American Travel Writing. His 2020 Rolling Stone magazine story, "America’s Radioactive Secret," won an award for longform writing with the National Association of Science Writers and inspired this book. Justin has been reporting on fracking in West Virginia for seven years and one of the first people he met was Pierson Keating's mother, April Pierson-Keating, who was a West Virginia land protector and visionary grassroots activist. Justin did not know April's son Pierson, but since April's passing they have developed a bond around their shared vision to spotlight her environmental causes. Pierson is a musician and presently living in Austin, with deep musical roots in West Virginia, and will be playing music inspired by his mother. No registration needed, just show up. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=775376
And, for the music lovers, here's a look at the weekend music lineup: http://www.nextthreedays.com/featuredevents.cfm?ET=1
Thanks for reading and have a great & safe weekend!
submitted by next3days to VirginiaTech [link] [comments]
Weekend Rundown of Fun: 1. 2024 Spring Carnival Friday, May 10, 2024, 5:00 - 11:00 PM, Saturday, May 11, 2024, 1:00 - 11:00 PM, Sunday, May 12, 2024, 1:00 - 10:00 PM Admission: Free Ride Tickets: $1.25 each and each ride takes multiple tickets, Unlimited Ride Wristbands: $25.00 per session Uptown Christiansburg (formerly New River Valley Mall) presents the 2024 Spring Carnival from Cole Shows Amusement Company starting on Thursday, May 2, 2024 continuing through Sunday, May 12, 2024. Enjoy amusement park rides, game booths, food and fun for the whole family. There is no gate fee. Unlimited wristbands are valid for one session which is 5:00-11:00 PM on Monday-Friday and either 1:00-6:00 PM or 5:00 PM to Close on Saturday and Sunday. Note: Hours are weather dependent. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777014
2. Throwback Double Feature: Shrek and Shrek 2 Starlite Drive-In Theatre, Christiansburg Friday, May 10, 2024 and Saturday, May 11, 2024, 8:30 - 11:40 PM Adults: $10.00, Kids Ages 6-12: $6.00, Kids Ages 5 & Under: Free The Starlite Drive-In Theatre presents a Throwback Double Feature featuring "Shrek" and "Shrek 2". "Shrek" is a 2001 animated film and "Shrek 2" is a 2004 animated film. Both films star the voices of Mike Myers, Eddie Murphy, and Cameron Diaz and are rated PG. Gates open at 6:30 PM and the first movie is expected to start around 8:30 PM. Concessions will be available for purchase. Cash or card accepted. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777372
3. College Baseball: Miami vs. Virginia Tech English Field, Virginia Tech Friday, May 10, 2024, 7:00 PM, Saturday, May 11, 2024, 7:00 PM, Sunday, May 12, 2024, 1:00 PM General Public: $10.00, Youth: $5.00 Watch the Virginia Tech Baseball Team compete against ACC conference opponent Miami in their three-game home series. Saturday will serve as Senior Day for all the senior Hokie players with a pre-game ceremony. On Sunday, there will be a special giveaway featuring flowers for all the mothers. It's also the Freshmen Class Trading Card Giveaway with post-game autographs with the freshmen class players, weather permitting. There will also be a Post-game Kids Run the Bases opportunity, weather permitting. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=776512
4. The Red Ferns and Smooth Brain in Concert The Milk Parlor, Blacksburg Friday, May 10, 2024, 8:30 PM - 12:00 AM Admission: $5.00 The Red Ferns is a groovy guitar band and Smooth Brain is a four-piece rock band. Both band are from Blacksburg, VA. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777365 5. Blacksburg Farmers Market with Music from Fats Holler Market Square Park, Blacksburg Saturday, May 11, 2024, 8:00 AM - 2:00 PM Admission: Free The Blacksburg Farmers Market offers local meats, organic produce, baked goods, crafts, flowers and more in the heart of downtown Blacksburg. Fats Holler will performer from 9:30-11:30 AM. Fats Holler is a new group, formed in 2022, of seasoned musicians from the New River Valley. Having a repertoire primarily of music from the 1910's-1930's, they are bringing the sounds of old New Orleans to Southwest Virginia. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777386
6. Scottish Highland Games Clinic YMCA of Pulaski County, Pulaski Saturday, May 11, 2024, 9:00 AM - 2:00 PM Admission: $25.00 Join the YMCA's very own instructor and professional Highland Game athlete Jonathan Harding to learn what it takes to compete in your first Highland Games. The goal of this event is to cover all nine events during the clinic. Jonathan was invited to the World Highland Games in 2023 and finished 7th overall! All skill levels welcome. Whether you are a beginner or a Highland Game athlete looking to improve on your technique, there will be something to gain. All proceeds from this clinic will go support the the YMCA's 2024 Highland Games Competition. For ages 15 and up. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777406
7. 2024 New River Valley Master Gardener Association Plant Sale Montgomery County Government Center, Christiansburg Saturday, May 11, 2024, 9:00 AM - 2:00 PM Admission: Free The New River Valley Master Gardener Association (NRVMGA) Plant Sale will be offering native plants, vegetables, annuals, herb, perennials, trees, shrubs and house plants. Many plants are grown by NRVMGA members and others are donated by retailers, individuals and organizations from throughout the area. There will also be a "garden supply/treasure area" with gardening related items for sale. The Plant Clinic will be on-site to answer your questions, problem plant issues, or gardening concerns. There will also be a selection of free seeds to give away to help support pollinators in our area. All proceeds fund our Community Grants Program which provides funding for educational gardening projects throughout the New River Valley. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=776743
8. Mustangs of the New River Valley Car Show Clayton Homes of Dublin, Dublin Saturday, May 11, 2024, 9:00 AM - 3:00 PM Admission: Free Clayton Homes of Dublin presents Mustangs of the New River Valley Car Show and a chance to check out their homes. Enjoy the Countryman Jamaican Grill food truck, sweet rides, and fun for the whole family. Plus, there will be trophies for the car show contestants with the best classic mustang, best modern mustang, and best overall. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777371
9. Spring Fever Handcrafted Market Glencoe Mansion, Museum & Gallery, Radford Saturday, May 11, 2024, 10:00 AM - 3:00 PM Admission: Free Shop local and handmade at the Spring Fever Handcrafted Market. Enjoy shopping with 20+ unique & one-of-a-kind artisans, makers, and modern crafters as well as food & dessert vendors including the Radford High School Performing Arts who will be holding a Snacks & Sodas fundraiser for guests. Make sure to visit the Glencoe Mansion Gift Shop, which is also home to unique handcrafted goods & Radford themed souvenirs. Glencoe Museum will be open until 4:00 PM. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=776736
10. 2024 Spring Open House P. Buckley Moss Gallery, Blacksburg Saturday, May 11, 2024, 11:00 AM - 4:00 PM and Sunday, May 12, 2024, 12:00 - 3:00 PM Admission: Free Meet the artist P Buckley Moss herself as we introduce her latest edition "Changing the Future" depicting the newest Corps of Cadet Buildings on the Virginia Tech Campus. Come in and celebrate her 91st year! the gallery will have a large selection of university themed prints and original watercolours for your graduating seniors as well as something for everyone in the family. Make sure to put your name in the hat for our P Buckley Moss Gift basket which will be drawn on Sunday at 3:00 PM. Parking is available on the street and in the city lot across from the gallery as well as in the Kent Square parking garage. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=776766
11. Carriage Rides for Mother's Day Draper Mercantile and Trading Company, Draper Saturday, May 11, 2024, 11:00 AM - 3:00 PM and Sunday, May 12, 2024, 2:00 - 6:00 PM Carriage Rides: $20.00 Take a charming carriage ride around Draper Mercantile's picturesque village and create memories that will last a lifetime from Suthers Carriage Company. Perfect for capturing those special moments with Mom. Additionally, indulge in our delectable new food and beverage items specially curated for the month of May. Online reservations are available. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777395
12. Earth Day - We Didn't Miss It! JBR Vineyards LLC, Pearisburg Saturday, May 11, 2024, 12:00 - 5:00 PM and Sunday, May 12, 2024, 1:00 - 5:00 PM Admission: Free Wine Pricing: Tasting: $5.00, Glass of Wine: $5.00, Bottles of Wine: $15.00-$20.00 plus tax Every day is earth day at JBR Vineyards. They take very good care of their vines because planet Earth is the only planet with wine. See our vineyard and taste wines from grapes rarely grown in Virginia. Remember to celebrate with your graduate and bring mom on her special day. Dogs and kids welcome. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777282
13. Free Outdoor Acroyoga Class and Jam Henderson Lawn, Virginia Tech Saturday, May 11, 2024, 1:00 - 3:00 PM Admission: Free In Balance Yoga presents a Free Outdoor Acroyoga Class and Jam. Learn about the playful practice of Acroyoga in a safe environment. No experience or partner is necessary. This free event will consist of one hour guided learning, and one hour of free form jam time. In case of rain, the rain location will be In Balance Yoga at their 1512 North Main Street location. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777118
14. Mount Tabor Ruritan Club's 2024 Fish Fry Kickoff with DJ Earl Brown Slusser's Chapel Church of God, Blacksburg In Person: Adults: $12.00, Children Ages 3-11: $6.00, Children Under 3: Free, Carry-Outs: $12.00 The Mount Tabor Ruritan Club presents their 2024 Fish Fry Kickoff and May event under the picnic shelter below the lower church parking lot. Enjoy a serving fish, fries, slaw, homemade desserts, and beverage. DJ Earl Brown will be spinning some hits to get the 2024 fry season off to a swinging start. This is a fundraiser for the Ruritan Club's community service projects and scholarships. The event will be held rain or shine. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=776749
15. 2024 Rockin' Main Street Concert Series Kickoff with The Jared Stout Band and Noah Spencer Downtown Christiansburg, Christiansburg Saturday, May 11, 2024, 5:00 - 9:00 PM Admission: Free The Town of Christiansburg and the Christiansburg Parks & Rec kicks off their 2024 Rockin' Main Street Concert Series featuring music from The Jared Stout Band and Noah Spencer. Celebrate food and music in downtown Christiansburg. Attendees can purchase food and drinks from a selection of food trucks and wine & beer vendors. Get ready to experience the high-octane energy and soulful sound of the Jared Stout Band. This alt-country powerhouse hails from Southwestern Virginia and is known for their unique blend of Appalachian rhythm and blues. As runners-up for the "On-The-Rise" award at FloydFest 22, the Jared Stout Band delivers an unforgettable performance by bringing their own energetic and soulful original songs to the stage. Noah Spencer is an up and coming musician from Richlands in Southwest Virginia. He brings a genuine passion to the stage with a voice that's both soft and smooth, but also gritty and soulful. His shows cover a wide range of styles from country to rock, Americana, pop, and gospel. He enjoys singing and playing guitar, drums, piano and the ukulele. Noah was also a contestant and starred on NBC's "The Voice" in Season 24 advancing to the playoff rounds. Please bring your IDs if you would like to purchase beer or wine. Tables and chairs will be set up along Main Street. However, attendants are encouraged to bring lawn chairs to sit at the square and watch the live music. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=776697
16. 2024 Bluegrass and Baseball Benefit with Lonesome River Band, Gold Rush and Hot Dog Supper Newport Community Center, Newport Saturday, May 11, 2024, 5:30 - 9:30 PM Admission: $25.00 Enjoy a night of legendary bluegrass music with nationally known bluegrass artists the Lonesome River Band along with opener and Giles County's own Gold Rush to support the youth baseball and softball programs in the Newport community starting at 7:00 PM at the 3rd Annual Bluegrass and Baseball Benefit. A hotdog supper will precede the event starting at 5:30 PM in the cafeteria along with a raffle which will include a banjo autographed by both the Lonesome River Band and Gold Rush as well as other items. Lonesome River Band continues their reputation as one of the most respected names in bluegrass music. Led by five-time International Bluegrass Music Association (IBMA) Banjo Player of the Year and Virginia Country Music Hall of Famer Sammy Shelor, the group holds a powerhouse line up of award-winning players. In 2023, over 150 kids participated on teams based in Newport. This concert helps provide essential funding for uniforms, equipment, practice space, and experiences for players age 3-16. Donations are always welcome to the Newport Sports Booster Club, a registered 501c3 organization. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777383
17. Irish Trad Jam with Mist on the Mountain Rising Silo Farm Brewery, Blacksburg Saturday, May 11, 2024, 6:00 - 9:00 PM Admission: Free Mist on the Mountain is an Irish Traditional Music group based in the New River Valley. From lively jigs and reels to heartbreaking laments and rollicking ballads, Mist on the Mountain provides great Irish music for any occasion. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777070
18. Father Sun in Concert Dogtown Roadhouse, Floyd Saturday, May 11, 2024, 8:00 - 11:00 PM Admission: Free Father Sun embodies the true spirit of reggae with a blend of experienced artistry and youthful energy. Father Sun’s repertoire encompasses reggae covers and original compositions, each note carrying the authentic vibe of the genre. Their performances are not mere musical exhibitions; they are heartfelt celebrations of life and the universal language of music. Join Father Sun on their musical odyssey, where the essence of reggae is embraced and shared, connecting soul and spreading positivity wherever their music is heard. Laying the bassline of this musical journey is Janiah Allen, a seasoned musician known for his collaborations with Alliens, Music Road Co, Solazo, Jordan Harman & the Humble Brags, Sol Roots and The Ambassador. Alongside Janiah is his son, Nyo Allen, whose exceptional drumming skills bring life to Father Sun’s beats. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777370
19. Mother's Day Brunch Buffet Our Daily Bread Bakery & Bistro, Blacksburg Sunday, May 12, 2024, 9:00 AM - 2:00 PM, Adults: $35.00, Kids: $17.00 The Mother's Day Brunch Buffet Menu includes: Herb Roasted Prime Rib, Spiral Ham, Salmon with Lemon and Dill, Sausage & Ham Strata, Mushroom, Spinach & Gruyere Strata, Herb Roasted Garlic Potatoes, French Toast Casserole, Maple Chicken Sausage Links, Scrambled Eggs, Assorted Breads and Pastry and more. Tax and gratuity not included. No reservations. The buffet is first come, first serve. Mimosas, espresso and more will be available a la carte. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=775117
20. Mother's Day Brunch Buffet Bull & Bones Brewhaus & Grill, Blacksburg Sunday, May 12, 2024, 11:00 AM - 3:00 PM Adults: $35.00, Kids 6-12: $10.00, Ages 5 & Under: Free Bull & Bones Brewhaus & Grill presents a Mother's Day Brunch Buffet. The Mother's Day Brunch Buffet Menu entrees include Smoked Salmon with Dill, Sliced Grilled Loin Steak, French Toast with Syrup and Fruit Compote, Biscuits and Sausage Gravy, Smoked Ribs and Pork & Brisket among others along with sides and Strawberry Shortcake with Whipped Cream Price fr dessert. The buffet includes coffee, juice and condiments. Reservations are available via email.Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=775100
21. Mother's Day Celebration with Music from Leslie Brooks Moon Hollow Brewing, Blacksburg Sunday, May 12, 2024, 2:00 - 8:00 PM Admission: Free Musician Leslie Brooks will be performing on the patio from 4:00-7:00 PM, slushies will be available from 2:00-8:00 PM for a special Mother's Day Slushie Sunday and Driftwood Catering food truck will be on site. Leslie Brooks is a singer-songwriter, performing solo with guitar, playing jazz, folk, blues, rockin' country and popular favorites originally. She has played the best venues in a 16-state area, as well as in Norway and Monte Carlo. Opened for Heart, James Taylor, Bob Margolin and Willie Nelson to name a few. Latitude-Permanent Jewelry Co. will also be on site doing permanent jewelry from 3:00-7:00 PM. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777369
22. Author Night with Justin Nobel Blacksburg Books, Blacksburg Sunday, May 12, 2024, 5:00 - 6:30 PM Admission: Free Blacksburg Books presents an Author Night with Justin Nobel and his special guest Pierson Keating. Justin Nobel will share findings from his book "Petroleum-238" which is an acclaimed science journalist’s extraordinary seven-year investigation into how the U.S. oil and gas industry has avoided environmental regulations and created a dangerous and radioactive public health crisis. Nobel relies on oilfield workers, community activists, a century of academic research, and a trove of never-before released industry and government documents to lay out a series of game-changing reveals into the world’s most powerful industry. Justin Nobel writes on science and environment for US magazines, investigative sites, and literary journals. His work has been published in Best American Science and Nature Writing and Best American Travel Writing. His 2020 Rolling Stone magazine story, "America’s Radioactive Secret," won an award for longform writing with the National Association of Science Writers and inspired this book. Justin has been reporting on fracking in West Virginia for seven years and one of the first people he met was Pierson Keating's mother, April Pierson-Keating, who was a West Virginia land protector and visionary grassroots activist. Justin did not know April's son Pierson, but since April's passing they have developed a bond around their shared vision to spotlight her environmental causes. Pierson is a musician and presently living in Austin, with deep musical roots in West Virginia, and will be playing music inspired by his mother. No registration needed, just show up. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=775376
And, for the music lovers, here's a look at the weekend music lineup: http://www.nextthreedays.com/featuredevents.cfm?ET=1
Thanks for reading and have a great & safe weekend!