For as far back as I can remember, my parents love for me was contingent around how well I did in sports. I remember the fear of playing subpar in a game, only to get screamed at by my parents and then given the silent treatment for days (I was 8). The older I got, the more skilled I became in sports, the more intense the pressure became. I did love sports, but it was my identity. I’d always be signed up for clubs, I’d spend hours a day post school practicing, etc. Weekends would be spent playing game after game, traveling around the state.
I remember our house was adorned with photos of me everywhere playing sports. My mom would love to wear my high school jersey and letter jacket places. The refrigerator was lined with newspaper clippings of my sports games. My dad (who played himself growing up) was no doubt living vicariously through me.
I remember in high school my girlfriend walked into my bedroom and laughed that my room was made out to be a shrine. Posters of me playing sports everywhere, flags with my last name and sports awards, trophies lining every corner, etc. I could care less about any of that, but my mom insisted on decorating my room in that fashion.
After a lifetime of sports, I was recruited to college to play as well. I was injured freshman year and my sports career ended. Honestly I welcomed the end of the pressure. However, that’s when the abuse began with my parents and sibling. It only spiraled for decades until I went no contact a couple years ago.
Nothing I ever did after my sports “career” (graduating with my masters degree, getting a high profile job, getting married, having kids, etc) ever warranted pride from them. If it wasn’t sports related, they didn’t care- and the abuse continued.
My wife and I were recently deep cleaning when we came upon a large tote my mom had given me years ago. She said she was cleaning and packed up all my childhood memories for me to keep. I decided to go through them. The tote is packed full of 1,000s of newspaper clippings of me playing sports, videos of me playing, my old jerseys, trophies, plaques, etc. There are a couple of my yearbooks, and then a box labeled childhood photos of which ALL are sports. Of hundreds, maybe 5 are as a baby and unrelated to sports. Then a box labeled “papers”. Every paper is about sports- college recruiters, awards, etc. That’s it, that’s all my memories.
No growth charts, vaccine charts, doctor visits, childhood pictures unrelated to sports. No baby clothes, drawings, school report cards, school plays, etc.
Only sports. I must admit they kept a lot. And the records of my sports are all meticulously laminated, etc. To a stranger (or to those who try and convince me I’m the issue because my parents “did so much for me always taking me to sports” and I should forgive them) would think they were amazing parents by the looks of the tote. Yet to me it’s so clear, all I was a trophy for them to get recognition for and as soon as I no longer played I lost my value.
Curious if anyone else can relate to this?

For as far back as I can remember, my parents love for me was contingent around how well I did in sports. I remember the fear of playing subpar in a game, only to get screamed at by my parents and then given the silent treatment for days (I was 8). The older I got, the more skilled I became in sports, the more intense the pressure became. I did love sports, but it was my identity. I’d always be signed up for clubs, I’d spend hours a day post school practicing, etc. Weekends would be spent playing game after game, traveling around the state.
I remember our house was adorned with photos of me everywhere playing sports. My mom would love to wear my high school jersey and letter jacket places. The refrigerator was lined with newspaper clippings of my sports games. My dad (who played himself growing up) was no doubt living vicariously through me.
I remember in high school my girlfriend walked into my bedroom and laughed that my room was made out to be a shrine. Posters of me playing sports everywhere, flags with my last name and sports awards, trophies lining every corner, etc. I could care less about any of that, but my mom insisted on decorating my room in that fashion.
After a lifetime of sports, I was recruited to college to play as well. I was injured freshman year and my sports career ended. Honestly I welcomed the end of the pressure. However, that’s when the abuse began with my parents and sibling. It only spiraled for decades until I went no contact a couple years ago.
Nothing I ever did after my sports “career” (graduating with my masters degree, getting a high profile job, getting married, having kids, etc) ever warranted pride from them. If it wasn’t sports related, they didn’t care- and the abuse continued.
My wife and I were recently deep cleaning when we came upon a large tote my mom had given me years ago. She said she was cleaning and packed up all my childhood memories for me to keep. I decided to go through them. The tote is packed full of 1,000s of newspaper clippings of me playing sports, videos of me playing, my old jerseys, trophies, plaques, etc. There are a couple of my yearbooks, and then a box labeled childhood photos of which ALL are sports. Of hundreds, maybe 5 are as a baby and unrelated to sports. Then a box labeled “papers”. Every paper is about sports- college recruiters, awards, etc. That’s it, that’s all my memories.
No growth charts, vaccine charts, doctor visits, childhood pictures unrelated to sports. No baby clothes, drawings, school report cards, school plays, etc.
Only sports. I must admit they kept a lot. And the records of my sports are all meticulously laminated, etc. To a stranger (or to those who try and convince me I’m the issue because my parents “did so much for me always taking me to sports” and I should forgive them) would think they were amazing parents by the looks of the tote. Yet to me it’s so clear, all I was a trophy for them to get recognition for and as soon as I no longer played I lost my value.
Curious if anyone else can relate to this?

For as far back as I can remember, my parents love for me was contingent around how well I did in sports. I remember the fear of playing subpar in a game, only to get screamed at by my parents and then given the silent treatment for days (I was 8). The older I got, the more skilled I became in sports, the more intense the pressure became. I did love sports, but it was my identity. I’d always be signed up for clubs, I’d spend hours a day post school practicing, etc. Weekends would be spent playing game after game, traveling around the state.
I remember our house was adorned with photos of me everywhere playing sports. My mom would love to wear my high school jersey and letter jacket places. The refrigerator was lined with newspaper clippings of my sports games. My dad (who played himself growing up) was no doubt living vicariously through me.
I remember in high school my girlfriend walked into my bedroom and laughed that my room was made out to be a shrine. Posters of me playing sports everywhere, flags with my last name and sports awards, trophies lining every corner, etc. I could care less about any of that, but my mom insisted on decorating my room in that fashion.
After a lifetime of sports, I was recruited to college to play as well. I was injured freshman year and my sports career ended. Honestly I welcomed the end of the pressure. However, that’s when the abuse began with my parents and sibling. It only spiraled for decades until I went no contact a couple years ago.
Nothing I ever did after my sports “career” (graduating with my masters degree, getting a high profile job, getting married, having kids, etc) ever warranted pride from them. If it wasn’t sports related, they didn’t care- and the abuse continued.
My wife and I were recently deep cleaning when we came upon a large tote my mom had given me years ago. She said she was cleaning and packed up all my childhood memories for me to keep. I decided to go through them. The tote is packed full of 1,000s of newspaper clippings of me playing sports, videos of me playing, my old jerseys, trophies, plaques, etc. There are a couple of my yearbooks, and then a box labeled childhood photos of which ALL are sports. Of hundreds, maybe 5 are as a baby and unrelated to sports. Then a box labeled “papers”. Every paper is about sports- college recruiters, awards, etc. That’s it, that’s all my memories.
No growth charts, vaccine charts, doctor visits, childhood pictures unrelated to sports. No baby clothes, drawings, school report cards, school plays, etc.
Only sports. I must admit they kept a lot. And the records of my sports are all meticulously laminated, etc. To a stranger (or to those who try and convince me I’m the issue because my parents “did so much for me always taking me to sports” and I should forgive them) would think they were amazing parents by the looks of the tote. Yet to me it’s so clear, all I was a trophy for them to get recognition for and as soon as I no longer played I lost my value.
Curious if anyone else can relate to this?

For as far back as I can remember, my parents love for me was contingent around how well I did in sports. I remember the fear of playing subpar in a game, only to get screamed at by my parents and then given the silent treatment for days (I was 8). The older I got, the more skilled I became in sports, the more intense the pressure became. I did love sports, but it was my identity. I’d always be signed up for clubs, I’d spend hours a day post school practicing, etc. Weekends would be spent playing game after game, traveling around the state.
I remember our house was adorned with photos of me everywhere playing sports. My mom would love to wear my high school jersey and letter jacket places. The refrigerator was lined with newspaper clippings of my sports games. My dad (who played himself growing up) was no doubt living vicariously through me.
I remember in high school my girlfriend walked into my bedroom and laughed that my room was made out to be a shrine. Posters of me playing sports everywhere, flags with my last name and sports awards, trophies lining every corner, etc. I could care less about any of that, but my mom insisted on decorating my room in that fashion.
After a lifetime of sports, I was recruited to college to play as well. I was injured freshman year and my sports career ended. Honestly I welcomed the end of the pressure. However, that’s when the abuse began with my parents and sibling. It only spiraled for decades until I went no contact a couple years ago.
Nothing I ever did after my sports “career” (graduating with my masters degree, getting a high profile job, getting married, having kids, etc) ever warranted pride from them. If it wasn’t sports related, they didn’t care- and the abuse continued.
My wife and I were recently deep cleaning when we came upon a large tote my mom had given me years ago. She said she was cleaning and packed up all my childhood memories for me to keep. I decided to go through them. The tote is packed full of 1,000s of newspaper clippings of me playing sports, videos of me playing, my old jerseys, trophies, plaques, etc. There are a couple of my yearbooks, and then a box labeled childhood photos of which ALL are sports. Of hundreds, maybe 5 are as a baby and unrelated to sports. Then a box labeled “papers”. Every paper is about sports- college recruiters, awards, etc. That’s it, that’s all my memories.
No growth charts, vaccine charts, doctor visits, childhood pictures unrelated to sports. No baby clothes, drawings, school report cards, school plays, etc.
Only sports. I must admit they kept a lot. And the records of my sports are all meticulously laminated, etc. To a stranger (or to those who try and convince me I’m the issue because my parents “did so much for me always taking me to sports” and I should forgive them) would think they were amazing parents by the looks of the tote. Yet to me it’s so clear, all I was a trophy for them to get recognition for and as soon as I no longer played I lost my value.
Curious if anyone else can relate to this?

NSFW Warning
I truly don't know what to do anymore, I'm completely lost.
I'm a 20 year old male with autism and possible OCD.
There are many things I want to talk about so this is going to be really long and unorganised.
From age 18 up until last year, I viewed and masturbated to CSAM, and the way I went about getting hold of it is equally bad, if not worse. I cannot express in words the shame and remorse I feel for this.
I know most of you hate me now and I don't blame you, and I guarantee you I hate myself more for it.
The most confusing part about it is I don't find children attractive, there's no groinal response, urges, desires, arousal, nothing. I don't even take a second glance or stare, the only thing I have is intrusive thoughts. Recently I was sat in the corner of a crowded bus, and since there was nowhere else to sit, three boys, none of which could have been older than 13 sat by me, one next to me, and the other two across from me, to which I felt nothing of that nature whatsoever.
My instincts when I've been around children in recent times is purely parental and protective.
I'd never hurt a child, especially in that way, I'd slit my wrists or set myself on fire before I did that, I might just slit my wrists anyway.
I'd run into a burning building, I'd run out onto a busy road, I'd give my life to save a child's life.
I don't go out of my way to be around children, I find them for the most part irritating, I don't hate them though. Throughout my entire life I preferred the company of adults. I even live across from a playground ffs.
I'm scarred for life by some of the things I saw in those images and videos, how the hell could someone do something like that?! I want to climb through the screen and protect those kids, give them a hug and let them know nothing can hurt them anymore.
I stumbled across an image hosting site when I was 16 whilst trying to find material involving my peers again, and the site hosted lots of cropped images of teens on webcams and older kids on webcams (it was obvious what they were doing), and on the page for the accounts, it usually displayed an email where stuff could be traded, but I didn't pursue that until 2 years later.
I went about acquiring it through sending old images and videos of myself, and in a lot worse way as well.
Starting from 14 up until last year, I very occasionally placed my phone in the bathroom and filmed my friends urinating, this happened definitely less than ten times, and most of them I deleted from everywhere, but I kept one and a screenshot of a few others, I started posting these images, as well as my own nudes, on an old reddit account which was deleted not long after, I made sure to hide their identities while doing this, I enjoyed the attention and compliments I would get, and I loved bigging up my friends and seeing them get compliments.
Then I used this content to acquire the bad stuff years later, including the stuff of me.
I had an Idea that this was considered wrong but I didn't understand how it could have been harmful.
This happened to less than 5 friends, all the content I had I have long since deleted and wiped any access to, and I have no intention to do this again, but the main issue is the fact that copies could have been made of it, and I accidentally sent the uncropped video once. There's the possibility none of this stuff is out there, but it's still vile and repulsive.
One of them was my closest friend, who I had known basically all my life, I broke down to him and told him what I had done and what I believe does me to this awful, reprehensible place, and you know what he did? He told me he forgave me and that some video possibly being out there doesn't phase him and his life isn't ruined at all and it will go on either way.
But he understandably said we can't see each other anymore, that he still loves me, believes I'm a good person and wants me to live a good life and make the world a better place, which was a dream of ours.
It's extra difficult because we were so close, we had experienced so much together, held all the same interests and beliefs, and I loved him only like family could, so the fact I committed this vile act of betrayal rids me with so much shame, and deservedly so. In a way I find it harder to get through because I didn't understand the true consequences of my actions and how this could have affected him and others, it would be less confusing and easier to accept I'm just the lowest form of humanity that way.
I displayed other problematic behaviours from a young age, all to do with boundary issues, I sometimes used to touch my friends when I was 12 but never their actual genitals, and I used to jokingly show my erection to people as well.
The only constant that I knew for certain is wrong is genuine rape and molestation, which is a line I know for certain I could never cross, and never will.
From a very young age (around 3 or 4) my mother would do very inappropriate party tricks around me with her friends late at night when they were drinking, her friends would call me sexy, and as I got older and hit puberty, she started making comments about my bulge and other things despite the fact I hated it and told her so.
When I was 7 I was groomed and molested by an 8 year old boy, I wanted him to help me pass a level on my DS game and he said he'll do it if I have sex with him, me being 7 I didn't understand what that was and with him being older I complied. We were naked during this, he fondled my genitals and got me to do the same to him, he inserted his fingers into my anus as well.
When I was 10, two of my close friends groomed me, they simulated blowjobs on each other and got me to do the same to them.
When I was 11, my 12 year old friend groomed and molested me despite me protesting, he got me to get in my bed with him and he rubbed up against me. Earlier that day he also got me to sit in his lap whilst cuddling me from behind, we were wearing underwear.
When I was 13, that same friend when he was nearly 14 and another friend who was already 14 groomed and molested me in my pool again, I had an erection in the pool and jokingly showed one of them it, and it escalated from there. They both got naked and got me to do so, I protested but eventually gave in to the pressure, they also showed each other their genitals and got me to do the same, later that boy got me to sit in his lap again whilst the older boy rubbed up against me.
There was also just the normal experimenting stuff, one of my friends used to show me his erections and I would do the same.
All of my friends were going through puberty and their bodies were changing and so was mine, which I found incredibly fascinating and arousing, and I had seen most of my friends genitals and some other students genitals throughout growing up, so me being young and autistic, I became very curious.
Kids before finishing Elementary/Primary School were swearing and talking about sex, then as I got older (11) kids were drinking, smoking, doing drugs, talking about masturbation habits and apparently having genuine sex. Then by the time I was 13, there was a lot of students taking nudes, nudes being spread around school and nudes being leaked (including mine, which distressed me for a few days, but only because people knew they were mine, if they were spread around but they didn't know it was me, I wouldn't have cared), kids with condoms and other stuff etc.
I started watching non-pornographic sexual content online (sex scenes from movies, TV shows, games etc) at age 9 which I would genuinely get an erection from watching.
At age 10 I hit puberty (testicles largened) and I started masturbating to non pornographic stuff. Including videos of animals mating. I also tried to find stuff involving my peers and found a fake video of stuff suggestive of that.
At 11 I started to grow pubic hair and had my first ejaculations, as well as discover porn, and I had my first crush which was on a 12 year old boy who was another friend, who I would masturbate to. This crush lasted a number of years, but he was straight so it couldn't go anywhere. This was also the age I started taking nudes and videos of me masturbating.
At 12 I started to grow underarm har and facial hair began to appear on my upper lip, I was watching porn very heavily at this point.
At 13 my voice had broken and I was nearly my full adult height, this was also the age I first masturbated to a non-sexual nude image of a child. As well as videos of stuff like naturism and videos of circumcision (I don't have a pain or gore fetish, I would just blank it out and focus on the genitals.)
By 14 I was my full adult height, I had adult sized ejacualtions and my penis had fully grown. And that is when I started posting my nudes online. To which I would have sexual conversations with adults, not knowing I was setting myself up to be groomed and have something normalised in my head which shouldn't be.
By 15 I was growing facial hair, as well as chest and abdominal hair. And I found a shotacon involving a boy my age having sex with an adult woman, and I would pretend to be him.
At 17, a 19 year old flirted with me and got me into sending nudes to him, and he did the same, which I didn't see as bad and despite it being technically illegal, I still don't.
I also did the same when I was 19 with a 17 year old stranger online, but they were very willing and I didn't pressure them, no personal info was shared between us.
I also messaged a 15 and 14 year old at some point but stopped myself from letting it go any further. And cut them off before anything could be shared.
And when I started watching the CSAM, it was mostly teens 9n webcams that I watched, I was lured into thinking that this content isn't kids being assaulted or anything (which it is) and due to my experiences twisting my view, I thought kids were enjoying it (which they weren't) since I would have had enjoyed it at that age (which I wouldn't have) it wasn't until I saw unmistakable suffering which is when I stopped and vowed to never go there again. It was mostly stuff involving boys, the stuff involving girls I just found too revolting. I wanted to relive those experiences, go back to a time I was happier. It felt safe and comforting.
All of these experiencs warped my views and understanding of things, desensitised me and made me believe things were ok that weren't and that kids aren't as innocent as they are seen to be (which they are). I have never commited rape or an act of molestation and never will, these are acts I've always seen as vile and disgusting.
I've suffered with mental health issues for a long time as well.
I've struggled with feelings of self-hatred and worthlessness since around 9 or 10.
I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety at 13, I've been self harming and suicidal since 15, I've also been attempting suicide since 15.
I've always felt like the odd one out, I always felt like I was the worst at everything, I was the one who was left out of games at school, the one who was always picked last in sports.
I was bullied a lot growing up, by students and occasionally teachers alike.
My mother is narcissistic and has been emotionally and occasionally physically abusive to me since I was 14 (telling me she hates me and that everyone else hates me, tells me how horrible I am, tells me that I should kill myself and do everyone a favour, threatened to stab me in my sleep, hit me on the occasion, bit me, threw things at me, including heavy things and glass, strangled me).
I truly don't know what to do anymore, I'm completely lost.
I'm a 20 year old male with autism and possible OCD.
There are many things I want to talk about so this is going to be really long and unorganised.
From age 18 up until last year, I viewed and masturbated to CSAM, and the way I went about getting hold of it is equally bad, if not worse. I cannot express in words the shame and remorse I feel for this.
I know most of you hate me now and I don't blame you, and I guarantee you I hate myself more for it.
The most confusing part about it is I don't find children attractive, there's no groinal response, urges, desires, arousal, nothing. I don't even take a second glance or stare, the only thing I have is intrusive thoughts. Recently I was sat in the corner of a crowded bus, and since there was nowhere else to sit, three boys, none of which could have been older than 13 sat by me, one next to me, and the other two across from me, to which I felt nothing of that nature whatsoever.
I'm sexually attracted to males 20 and over, and I'm romantically and sexually attracted to females 20 and over, I wouldn't even date an 18 or 19 year old.
My instincts when I've been around children in recent times is purely parental and protective.
I'd never hurt a child, especially in that way, I'd slit my wrists or set myself on fire before I did that, I might just slit my wrists anyway.
I'd run into a burning building, I'd run out onto a busy road, I'd give my life to save a child's life.
I don't go out of my way to be around children, I find them for the most part irritating, I don't hate them though. Throughout my entire life I preferred the company of adults. I even live across from a playground ffs.
I'm scarred for life by some of the things I saw in those images and videos, how the hell could someone do something like that?! I want to climb through the screen and protect those kids, give them a hug and let them know nothing can hurt them anymore.
I stumbled across an image hosting site when I was 16 whilst trying to find material involving my peers again, and the site hosted lots of cropped images of teens on webcams and older kids on webcams (it was obvious what they were doing), and on the page for the accounts, it usually displayed an email where stuff could be traded, but I didn't pursue that until 2 years later.
I went about acquiring it through sending old images and videos of myself, and in a lot worse way as well.
Starting from 14 up until last year, I very occasionally placed my phone in the bathroom and filmed my friends urinating, this happened definitely less than ten times, and most of them I deleted from everywhere, but I kept one and a screenshot of a few others, I started posting these images, as well as my own nudes, on an old reddit account which was deleted not long after, I made sure to hide their identities while doing this, I enjoyed the attention and compliments I would get, and I loved bigging up my friends and seeing them get compliments.
Then I used this content to acquire the bad stuff years later, including the stuff of me.
I had an Idea that this was considered wrong but I didn't understand how it could have been harmful.
This happened to less than 5 friends, all the content I had I have long since deleted and wiped any access to, and I have no intention to do this again, but the main issue is the fact that copies could have been made of it, and I accidentally sent the uncropped video once. There's the possibility none of this stuff is out there, but it's still vile and repulsive.
One of them was my closest friend, who I had known basically all my life, I broke down to him and told him what I had done and what I believe does me to this awful, reprehensible place, and you know what he did? He told me he forgave me and that some video possibly being out there doesn't phase him and his life isn't ruined at all and it will go on either way.
But he understandably said we can't see each other anymore, that he still loves me, believes I'm a good person and wants me to live a good life and make the world a better place, which was a dream of ours.
It's extra difficult because we were so close, we had experienced so much together, held all the same interests and beliefs, and I loved him only like family could, so the fact I committed this vile act of betrayal rids me with so much shame, and deservedly so. In a way I find it harder to get through because I didn't understand the true consequences of my actions and how this could have affected him and others, it would be less confusing and easier to accept I'm just the lowest form of humanity that way.
The other two friends I stopped communicating with, I wiped the account wiped the content from all areas they were stored on, deleted what they were stored, everything, and there is a possibility it's not out their at all.
I displayed other problematic behaviours from a young age, all to do with boundary issues, I sometimes used to touch my friends when I was 12 but never their actual genitals, and I used to jokingly show my erection to people as well.
The only constant that I knew for certain is wrong is genuine rape and molestation, which is a line I know for certain I could never cross, and never will.
From a very young age (around 3 or 4) my mother would do very inappropriate party tricks around me with her friends late at night when they were drinking, her friends would call me sexy, and as I got older and hit puberty, she started making comments about my bulge and other things despite the fact I hated it and told her so.
When I was 7 I was groomed and molested by an 8 year old boy, I wanted him to help me pass a level on my DS game and he said he'll do it if I have sex with him, me being 7 I didn't understand what that was and with him being older I complied. We were naked during this, he fondled my genitals and got me to do the same to him, he inserted his fingers into my anus as well.
When I was 10, two of my close friends groomed me, they simulated blowjobs on each other and got me to do the same to them.
When I was 11, my 12 year old friend groomed and molested me despite me protesting, he got me to get in my bed with him and he rubbed up against me. Earlier that day he also got me to sit in his lap whilst cuddling me from behind, we were wearing underwear.
When I was 13, that same friend when he was nearly 14 and another friend who was already 14 groomed and molested me in my pool again, I had an erection in the pool and jokingly showed one of them it, and it escalated from there. They both got naked and got me to do so, I protested but eventually gave in to the pressure, they also showed each other their genitals and got me to do the same, later that boy got me to sit in his lap again whilst the older boy rubbed up against me.
There was also just the normal experimenting stuff, one of my friends used to show me his erections and I would do the same.
All of my friends were going through puberty and their bodies were changing and so was mine, which I found incredibly fascinating and arousing, and I had seen most of my friends genitals and some other students genitals throughout growing up, so me being young and autistic, I became very curious.
Kids before finishing Elementary/Primary School were swearing and talking about sex, then as I got older (11) kids were drinking, smoking, doing drugs, talking about masturbation habits and apparently having genuine sex. Then by the time I was 13, there was a lot of students taking nudes, nudes being spread around school and nudes being leaked (including mine, which distressed me for a few days, but only because people knew they were mine, if they were spread around but they didn't know it was me, I wouldn't have cared), kids with condoms and other stuff etc.
I started watching non-pornographic sexual content online (sex scenes from movies, TV shows, games etc) at age 9 which I would genuinely get an erection from watching.
At age 10 I hit puberty (testicles largened) and I started masturbating to non pornographic stuff. Including videos of animals mating. I also tried to find stuff involving my peers and found a fake video of stuff suggestive of that.
At 11 I started to grow pubic hair and had my first ejaculations, as well as discover porn, there was also an image I masturbated to which depicted a boy of my age giving oral to a man, and I had my first crush which was on a 12 year old boy who was another friend, who I would masturbate to. This crush lasted a number of years, but he was straight so it couldn't go anywhere. This was also the age I started taking nudes and videos of me masturbating.
At 12 I started to grow underarm har and facial hair began to appear on my upper lip, I was watching porn very heavily at this point.
At 13 my voice had broken and I was nearly my full adult height, this was also the age I first masturbated to a non-sexual nude image of a child. As well as videos of stuff like naturism and videos of circumcision (I don't have a pain or gore fetish, I would just blank it out and focus on the genitals.)
By 14 I was my full adult height, I had adult sized ejacualtions and my penis had fully grown. And that is when I started posting my nudes online. To which I would have sexual conversations with adults, not knowing I was setting myself up to be groomed and have something normalised in my head which shouldn't be.
By 15 I was growing facial hair, as well as chest and abdominal hair. And I found a shotacon involving a boy my age having sex with an adult woman, and I would pretend to be him.
At 17, a 19 year old flirted with me and got me into sending nudes to him, and he did the same, which I didn't see as bad and despite it being technically illegal, I still don't.
I also did the same when I was 19 with a 17 year old stranger online, but they were very willing and I didn't pressure them, no personal info was shared between us.
I also messaged a 15 and 14 year old at some point but stopped myself from letting it go any further. And cut them off before anything could be shared, or any messages could be exchanged for that matter.
And when I started watching the CSAM, it was mostly teens 9n webcams that I watched, I was lured into thinking that this content isn't kids being assaulted or anything (which it is) and due to my experiences twisting my view, I thought kids were enjoying it (which they weren't) since I would have had enjoyed it at that age (which I wouldn't have), it wasn't until I saw unmistakable suffering which is when I stopped and vowed to never go there again. It was mostly stuff involving boys, the stuff involving girls I just found too revolting. I wanted to relive those experiences, go back to a time I was happier. It felt safe and comforting. It was relatable.
All of these experiencs warped my views and understanding of things, desensitised me and made me believe things were ok that weren't and that kids aren't as innocent as they are seen to be (which they are). I have never commited rape or an act of molestation and never will, these are acts I've always seen as vile and disgusting.
I've suffered with mental health issues for a long time as well.
I've struggled with feelings of self-hatred and worthlessness since around 9 or 10.
I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety at 13, I've been self harming and suicidal since 15, I've also been attempting suicide since 15.
I've always felt like the odd one out, I always felt like I was the worst at everything, I was the one who was left out of games at school, the one who was always picked last in sports.
I was bullied a lot growing up, by students and occasionally teachers alike, and even my boss at my first job.
My mother is a heavy drinker, narcissistic and has been emotionally and occasionally physically abusive to me since I was 14 (telling me she hates me and that everyone else hates me, tells me how horrible I am, tells me that I should kill myself and do everyone a favour, threatened to stab me in my sleep, hit me on the occasion, bit me, threw things at me, including heavy things and glass, strangled me). There was also manipulation tactics like gaslighting, she alienated me from others by telling her friends and family how awful I was. Pushed me into meltdowns and got me to lash out, to which she called the police and got me arrested and made me look like the bad one on multiple occasions.
My father was a drug addict who died when I was 14, I saw him less than ten times my whole life, he grew drugs in my room when I was an infant, my most distinct memory is him coming to my house very late one night when I was around 9 or 10 talking about demons and bad spirits.
Addiction runs in my family (my father's father is an equally heavy drinker, his mother is a drug addict who ran a brothel), so the addictive tendencies have been past down to me.
I probably was addicted to porn by 13, and had been feeding it for years without knowing it.
My adopted grandfather died when I was 4, and my adopted grandmother (which I lived with from birth) who was my guiding light, died less than a week before my dad did.
The only father figure I really had (who was an alcoholic but otherwise very good with me) was my mother's partner who she met when I was 6, and he died when I was 8.
I was also very close to my mother's best friend, who had been more of a mother to me than my actual one had been some time died when I was 17.
My mother had an abusive ex who stalked her and threatened to set fire to the house, who also left ranting letters and stood in the back garden at night, so we lived in fear of stuff like that for over a year from when I was 12 through 13.
She also had an abusive lodger who was an even heavier drinker than she is, so from when I was 14 through 16 I witnessed them physically fight, both get arrested and on a few occasions I had to defend her from him.
Many of my friends have betrayed me over the years (I know I'm one to talk) but when this started to happen I would have never dreamed of betraying anyone, personal stuff was shared about me which I trusted them with, there was a lot of bad talking about me without me knowing. My toe closest friend turned on me at age 12 and isolated me from my other friends, I blamed myself at the time which I why I moved schools at 13 since I thought I was just making everyone miserable.
I didn't get diagnosed with autism until I was q9 despite trying to get it since I was 12, it hurt knowing I had been paying my whole life for being different, feeling ashamed of who I am (and rightly so now really), wondering why what I said was offensive, why I didn't understandfulky why this was wrong, why I was so sensitive to jokes, why I took e everyhing literally, why I made impulsive and reckless decisions without understanding the consequences of them.
I was never considered attractive and was ridiculed for it (girls used to jokingly flirt with me to torment me at school). I'm 5'6, always have struggled with weight, hairline started receding at 16, eczema so my skin is always red, dry and flaky, really bad diastema and acid reflux which means it's really hard to make my breath smell nice and my teeth are very worn because of it. I have had sex with someone who was older than me and we were both consenting adults, and we were both very respectful of boundaries.
I was also desensitised to other things slide gore and violence, I played a lot of violent video games when I was a kid, my mother is really into controversial shock movies (she got me to watch Cannibal Holocaust with her when I was 11).
The worst part about all of this is the fact all my friends who I love would hate me if they knew about what I've done so, none of them would trust me anymore or respect me, which is what friendships are all about right? So in a way they feel strange, they feel fake.
I could never find a relationship or true love because nobody wants to date a serial sex offender.
I hate knowing the fact I'm a sex offender, it's eating me alive.
I'm not registered and there is no real proof of what I did, so I can't turn myself in or anything.
I want to do good in the world, I have so much love to give, but it feels wrong me helping people because it feels like there is a sinister undertone to everything I do.
I've always enjoyed being charitable, I love giving money to the homeless or putting change in a donations box.
I feel guilty whenever I feel hapoy since I don't deserve to be, the only things that I enjoy now are food and playing video games, it's the only job I get out of day to day life.
The only fate I deserve is being stabbed to death in prison or something.
All I want is to be loved and accepted despite my flaws and mistakes, but I never could be.
The only other person I've told is my mother, who has been supportive.
I've been on antidepressants since 18 and I'm trying to get therapy, but I'm not hoping or expecting anything good will happen from this. I've been in and out of therapy since I was 11.
I had dreams, I had aspirations, I wanted to change the world for the better, I wanted to have a son, not to hurt him, but so he doesn't end up like me, but I reliase that is not possible. I don't deserve to be around children.
I hate keeping secrets, but I have no choice but to keep this one.
I want to identify with good people, but I can't.
Every good thing I do is invalidated now.
I forgive everyone who has wronged me in anyway, since I'm worse than them.
I just pray I can go out doing good, doing the right thing.
I am no better than Jimmy Saville, Ian Watkins or any of them types of people.
If you want to motivate me to end it all, feel free.
If you have read through all of this, thank you.

Hello, just looking for advice on best next step. I have booked a sport class for my son in February, and when the classes started in April the sessions were initially cancelled for the first couple of weeks and then changed to a different location. I have informed the branch manager that I could not attend that new location, and requested a refund. This request as well as my follow-ups by email and WhatsApp messages were ignored (I am confident the contact details were correct since I had received prompt responses from them before that point). I have received a response from the head office admin team quite quickly, but they just forwarded my request to the local branch manager so ultimately it's still been ignored. It's now been over a month.
I have the names and addresses of the company directors based in Company House, would the next be to send them some kind of letter before going to small court claim? Could someone tell what type of letter I should send, and maybe point me out to a template?
The amount is just over a £100 and I could live without it, but it's more for the principle!
Thank you!

N64 Pictures: https://imgur.com/a/n64-games-n64-console-sCri6E3
Let me know if you need pictures of any of the items listed below. Shipping is $5 flat for anything under one pound. I've got 400+ transactions on this board and accept payment via PayPal (F&F) or Venmo (F&F) only.
Consoles
GBA Indigo - $80 shipped
GBA SP (Silver CIB) - $120 shipped
Nintendo 2DS w/ charger - $85 shipped
Nintendo 3DS XL Pokemon X & Y Edition Console - $225 shipped
Nintendo 64 Console w/ hookups + OEM Controller - $90 shipped
Nintendo Wii Console (gamecube compatible) w/ hookups + Wii remote & numb chuck - $75 shipped
PS2 w/ hookups, OEM controller, OEM memory card - $100 shipped
Retron 5 Hyperkin (GBA/GBC/SNES/NES/Genesis) unused CIB - $120 shipped
Super Nintendo w/ hookups & OEM controller - $95 shipped
Xbox OG Console w/ hookups & OEM controller + Project Gotham Racing (CIB) - $100 Shipped
Controllers/Accessories
Gameboy OEM Clam Shells (lot of 32) - $75 shipped
Gamecube OEM Controller (Indigo) - $30 shipped
Gamecube OEM Wavebird Controller w/ receiver- $95 shipped
NES OEM 10-Cart Storage Case (3x avail) - $20 + shipping each
N64 OEM Expansion Pak - $50 shipped
N64 OEM Green Controller - $30 shipped
N64 Memory Card - $14 shipped
PS2 Logitech Wireless Controller (w/ dongle) - $35 shipped
PS2 OEM Memory Card- $14 shipped
Sega GameGear Super Wide Gear - $20 shipped
Wii U Wireless Controller (WUP-005) & charging cable - $35 shipped (2x avail)
N64 Games
007 GoldenEye - $25
007 World is Not Enough - $14
Army Men Sarge's Heroes - $15
Automobil Lamborghini - $8
Backstage Assault - $12
Banjo Kazooie - $25
Bass Hunter 64 - $8
Beetle Adventure Racing - $17
Charlies Blasts - $40
Diddy Kong Racing - $25
Doom 64 - $30
Extreme G Racing - $10
Forsaken 64 - $10
Gex 64 - $16
Iggy's Reckin' Balls - $20
Killer Instinct Gold - $30
Knockout Kings 2000 - $6
Magical Tetris Challenge - $20
Mario Kart - $40
Monster Truck Madness - $15
MRC Multi Championship Racing - $10
Namco Museum 64 - $12
Nascar 99 - $7
Nascar 2000 - $7
NBA In the Zone 98 - $5
NBA Live 99 (CIB) - $20
NBA Showtime - $12
Polaris Sno-Cross -$30
Pokemon Snap - $20
Quest 64 - $25
Ready 2 Rumble Boxing - $12
Ridge Racer 64 - $15
San Francisco Rush - $15
Starfox 64 - $25
Star Wars Episode 1 Racer - $10
South Park Chef's Luv Shack - $25
Supercross 2000 - $7
Super Mario 64 - $35
Super Smash Bros. - $40
Tetrisphere - $12
Top Gear Rally - $10
Turok Dinosaur Hunter - $12
Turok 2 Seeds of Evil - $12
Vigilante 8 - $21
Virtual Pool - $13
Waialae Country Club - $6
War Gods - $10
Wave Race (Player's Choice) - $15
WCW Backstage Assault - $11
WCW NWO Revenge - $11
Wheel of Fortune - $11
Zelda Ocarina of Time (label wear) - $30
N64 Manuals
1080 Snowboarding - $7
Duke Nukem Manual - $10
Flying Dragon Manual - $40
Rush Extreme Racing - $8
Silicon Valley Space Station Manual - $40
Supercross 2000 - $6
Tony Hawk Pro Skater - $6
Nintendo Gamecube Games (CIB unless noted)
ATV Quad Power Racing 2 - $10
The Hobbit - $24
Enter the Matrix - $13
Eternal Darkness - $90
Fifa 2003 - $6
Fifa Street 2 - $25
Finding Nemo - $8
F-Zero GX - $90
Gun (missing manual) - $10
Harry Potter Chambers of Secret - $12
Killer 7 - $65
Luigi's Mansion - $60
Madden 2003 - $5
Madden 2007 - $8
Mario Golf Toadstool Tour - $27
Mario Kart Double Dash - $75
Monopoly Party - $10
Monsters, Inc. Scream Arena - $7
Nascar Thunder 2003 - $7
Pikmin - $50
Power Rangers Dino Thunder - $8
Resident Evil - $25
Resident Evil 2 - $100
Resident Evil 4 - $30
Resident Evil Zero - $18
The Sims Bustin Out - $12
Smuggler's Run (missing manual) - $12
Sonic Adventure Battle 2 (missing manual) - $45
Spiderman 2 - $15
Spyro A Hero's Tail (missing manual) - $15
SSX Tricky - $28
Starfox Assault - $45 (CIB; some wear to cover art)
Super Mario Sunshine (missing manual) -$35
Super Smash Brothers Melee - $60
Ty the Tasmanian Tiger (missing manual) - $12
WWE Crush Hour - $27
WWE Day of Reckoning 2 (missing manual) - $25
Nintendo DS Games (cart only unless CIB noted)
Avatar The Game - $6
Bionicle Matoran Adventures - $6
Build-A-Bear Workshop (CIB) - $6
Carnival (CIB) - $6
Deal or No Deal - $5
Guitar Hero On Tour Bundle (CIB) - $25
Happy Feet - $4
Horsez (CIB) - $6
Hot Wheels Beat That - $6
Kung Fu Panda (CIB) - $6
Mario Party DS - $13
Mario Kart DS (loose) - $15
Mario Kart DS (CIB) - $18
Mario & Sonic at the Olympic Games (CIB) - $10
Mario & Sonic at the Olympic Winter Games (CIB) - $10
Megaman Starforce Dragon - $85 shipped
Metroid Hunters First Hunt - $6
Nacho Libre - $15
Namco Museum DS - $8
Naruto Ninja Council 3 - $6
New Super Mario Bros. (CIB) -$22
Nickelodeon Team Umizoomi - $6
Phoenix Wright Ace Attorney - $20
Picross 3D - $9
Ping Pals - $3
Planet Puzzle League - $10
Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Explorers of Sky (case & manual only, no game) - $55
Pokemon Ranger Shadows of Almia (cart only) - $30
Ratatouille - $5
Rayman DS - $10
Ridge Racer DS - $8
Shrek Superslam - $5
Spiderman 3 - $8
Star Wars II The Original Trilogy (LEGO) - $6
Super Money Ball Touch & Roll - $6
Transformers Animated - $11
Tron Evolution - $4
Zhu Zhu Pets - $3
Nintendo 3DS (cart only unless noted)
Animal Crossing: New Leaf (CIB) - $20
Lego Marvel Superheroes: Universe in Peril - $5
Mario Kart 7 - $12
Minecraft New Nintendo 3DS Edition - $18
Pilotwings Resort - $10
Pokemon X (CIB) - $30
Skylander Giants - $6
Skylander Swap Force - $16
Skylander Trap Team - $12
Super Mario Maker - $10
Super Smash Bros (CIB) - $15
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - $9
Wipeout: Create & Cash - $5
Wreck-it Ralph - $6
Yo-Kai Watch - $15
NES Games (cart only; unless noted)
8 Eyes - $11
A Boy and His Blob (cart, box, manual) - $40
Blades of Steel - $8
Bubble Bobble - $16
Burgertime - $15
Castlevania II Simon's Quest - $15
Castlevania III Dracula's Curse - $45
Chip & Dale Rescue Rangers (CIB) - $125
Contra - $40
Dick Tracy - $7
Double Dragon - $13
Donkey Kong 3 - $20
Dr. Mario - $10
Duck Tales - (cart & box) - $100
Excite Bike - $11
Faxanadu - $11
GI Joe: A Real American Hero - $75
Golf - $3
Legend of Zelda - $30
Mickey Mousecapade - $7
Mike Tyson's Punch-out - $40
Paperboy - $16
Punch-Out - $20
Rad Racer - $6
RBI Baseball 3 (cart & box) - $25
Robocop - $10
Rollerball - $8
Skate or Die 2 (cart & box) - $65
Spy Hunter - $5
Street Fighter 2010 - $15
Super Glove Ball - $7
Super Mario Bros. 2 - $20
Super Off-Road - $12
Super Team Games - $7
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II - The Arcade Game (cart & box) - $80
Tiger Heli - $8
Wall Street Kid (cart, box, registration card, poster) - $45
WWF Wrestlemania - $6
SNES Games (cart only)
Aladdin - $15
Castlevania IV - $45
Clue - $5
Earthbound - $350
F-Zero (Player's Choice) - $20
Jungle Strike - $9
Ken Griffey Jr Major League Baseball - $11
Kirby's Avalanche - $15
Lion King - $11
Mario Paint - $6
Mega Man X - $32
Mickey Mania - $13
Mortal Kombat - $13
Ms. Pacman - $9
NBA All-Star Challenge - $5
Pilot Wings - $10
Scooby Doo Mystery - $11
Starfox - $15
Super Adventure Island - $16
Super Baseball 2020 - $13
Super Ghouls N Ghosts - $23
Super Mario All-Stars - $25
Super Mario Kart - $40
Super Mario World - $20
Super Punch Out - $28
Top Player Tennis - $8
WWF Raw - $13
Zombies Ate My Neighbors - $30
GBA (cart only unless noted)
Aggravation/Sorry/Scrabble - $5
Barnyard - $8
Bratz - $4
Care Bears Care Quest (CIB) - $28
Cars - $5
Cars (CIB) - $16
Castlevania Double Pack - $85
Cho Makaimura R Super Ghouls N Ghost ( Japanese Import) - $95 Shipped
Crash Bandicoot 2 N-tranced - $10
Crash Huge Adventure - $11
Curious George (CIB) - $28
Dave Mirra Freestyle BMX 2 - $4
Disney Party - $10
Disney Princess (CIB) - $12
Donkey Kong Country (GBC/CIB) - $56
Dora Explorer's Pirate Pig's Treasure - $4
Dragon Ball Z Supersonic Warriors - $20
Elf - $10
ESPN Great Outdoor Games Bass 2002 - $5
F-14 Tomcat - $7
Finding Nemo - $5
Green Eggs & Ham (CIB) - $20
Incredibles (CIB) - $14
Kong 8th Wonder of the World - $5
Lost Vikings - $25
Madden 2005 - $5
Mario Kart Super Circuit (torn label) - $20
Metroid Zero Mission - $60
Monsters Inc - $4
Monster Jam Maximum Destruction - $6
Namco Museum - $6
Oddworld Munch's Oddysee - $12
Pirates of the Caribbean - The Curse of the Black Pearl - $5
Pong Asterios Yar's Revenge - $4
Sonic Advance 3 - $25
Quad Desert Furty - $3
Shaun Palmers Pro Snowboarding (GBC/CIB) - $10
Shrek Swamp Kart Speedway - $5
Spirit Stallion of the Cimarron - $5
SpongeBob Battle for Bikini Bottom - $7
Spongebob Squarepants Super Sponge - $6
SSX 3 - $7
The Incredibles - $3
Thunder Alley - $5
Top Gear GT Championship - $10
Sony PSP (all CIB)
Crisis Core: Final Fantasy VII - $15
Gurumin A Monstrous Adventure - $42
LocoRoco - $10
Mega Man Powered Up - $38
Parappa the Rapper - $27
Sega Genesis Collection - $17
PS1 Games (CIB unless noted)
007 Tomorrow Never Dies - $7
Action Bass - $6
Andretti Racing (GH) - $5
Ball Breakers (sealed) - $10
Bass Championship - $7
Battle Arena Toshinden (GH) - $14
Bust A-Move 4 - $17
Driver 2 (GH) - $10
Fighting Force - $20
IHRA Drag Racing - $5
Missile Command - $6
MLB 2001 - $9
MLB 2003 - $9
Nascar Heat (CIB) - $7
NBA Live 2000 - $8
NBA Shootout 98 - $9
NHL 98 - $8
NHL Faceoff 97 (GH) - $5
PlayStation Underground Jampack Fall 2001 - $9
Resident Evil 2 (DualShock Edition) - $65
Rocket Power Team Rocket Rescue - $7
Rugrats in Paris: The Movie - $12
Spongebob SquarePants Super Pants - $7
Syphon Filter 2 (GH) - $10
Tecmo Super Bowl - $20
Tiger Woods 99 - $8
Tony Hawk Pro Skater 3 - $12
Twisted Metal 2 (Greatest Hits) - $32
Toy Story 2 - $22
Walt Disney World Quest: Magical Racing Tour - $20
World Cup 98 - $12
PS2 Games (CIB unless noted)
All-Star Baseball 2005 - $5
Ape Escape 2 - $48
Ape Escape 3 - $43
ATV Offroad Fury 2 - $6
Avatar the Last Airbender - $8
Batman Begins - $13
Batman Vengeance - $19
Buffy the Vampire Slayer Chaos Bleeds - $28
Burnout Revenge - $11
Burnout 3 Takedown - $13
Buzz the Mega Quiz - $12
Capcom Classics Collection Volume 2 - $13
Castlevania Lament of Innocence -$25
Corvette - $5
Crash Bandicoot The Wrath of the Cortex - $12
Crash Nitro Kart (GH) - $9
Crazy Taxi - $10
Dance Dance Revolution Extreme 2 - $7
Dead to Rights - $6
Devil May Cry (GH) - $7
Enter the Matrix - $10
Eragon - $6
Family Feud - $5
Finding Nemo - $6
Fire Pro Wrestling Returns - $10
Ford Racing 3 - $5
Frogger the Great Quest - $7
Golden Compass - $5
GTA 3- $10
Gran Turismo 3 - $5
Godfather the Game - $14
Guitar Hero - $10
Guitar Hero Aerosmith - $7
Guitar Hero II - $7
Guitar Hero III Legends of Rock - $9
High Heat Major League Baseball 2004 - $5
Hot Wheels Velocity - $10
Hot Wheels World Race (missing manual) - $12
Hobbit - $10
Ice Age 2 The Meltdown - $7
Ironman - $6
Karaoke Revolution Party - $8
Karaoke Revolution Presents: American Idol - $5
Legends of Wrestling II - $12
Lego Star Wars The Original Trilogy - $6
Lego Star Wars The Video Game - $7
Lord of the Rings Fellowship of the Ring - $10
Madden 2003 - $5
Madden 2004 - $5
Madden 2005 -$5
Madden 2007 - $5
Matt Hoffman's Pro BMX 2 - $10
Max Payne - $10
Metal Arms Glitch in the System - $16
Midway Arcade Treasures (1) - $12
Midway Arcade Treasures (2) - $12
MLB 07 the Show - $5
MLB Slugfest 2003 - $10
MLB Slugfest 2004 - $13
Namco Museum (GH) - $8
Nascar 2001 - $5
Nascar Thunder 2003 - $7
NBA Street - $12
Need for Speed Underground 2 (missing manual) - $20
NFL Blitz Pro - $10
NFL Street - $17
NFL Street 3 (missing manual) - $20
Onimusha 3 Demon Siege - $21
Pinball Hall of Fame - $5
Pirates - The Legend of Black Kat - $12
Power Rangers: Dino Thunder - $8
Reel Fishing III - $7
Resident Evil Code Veronica X - $13
Rise of Kasai - $8
Rocky - $11
Scarface the World is Yours - $45
Scooby Doo First Frights - $13
Sega Superstars - $10
Sega Superstar Tennis - $10
Shrek Superslam - $8
Simpson's Hit & Run (Greatest Hits) -$50
Spiderman - $10
Sprint Cars Road to Knoxville - $6
Spy Hunter - $7
Spy Hunter 2 (missing manual) - $7
Starsky & Hutch - $7
SSX - $7
SSX 3 - $9
SSX On Tour - $8
Superman Shadow of Apokolips - $14
Super Monkey Ball Adventure - $10
Summoner - $10
Taito Legends - $15
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2: Battlenexus (missing manual) - $17
Teen Titans - $22
Theme Park Roller Coaster - $8
Tiger Woods PGA Tour 2004 - $6
Thrillville - $6
Thrillville Off the Rails - $10
Time Crisis 3 - $23
Ty the Tasmanian Tiger - $11
Wheel of Fortune - $6
Virtua Fighter 4 (missing manual) - $6
Warriors of Might & Magic - $10
WWE Smackdown vs Raw - $11
WWE Smackdown vs Raw 2007 (Sealed) - $45
WWE Smackdown vs Raw 2007 - $17
WWE Smackdown vs Raw 2009 - $10
WWE Smackdown Shut Your Mouth - $15
PS3
Band Hero - $6
Batman Arkham Asylum - $7
Battlefield 3 - $6
Call of Duty Advanced Warfare - $6
Call of Duty Ghosts - $6
Call of Duty Mordern Warfare 3 - $6
Call of Duty 4 Modern Warfare - $7
Call of Juarez Bound in Blood - $9
Crysis 2 - $7
Dirt 2 - $12
Dirt 3 - $10
Driver San Francisco - $25
Enemy Territory Quake Wars - $9
Fifa Soccer 11 - $5
Fight Night Champion - $13
GTA IV Complete Edition - $25
Gran Turismo 5 Prologue - $8
Gran Turismo XL Edition - $11
Gran Turismo 6 - $19
Heavy Fire: Afghanistan - $10
Infamous - $6
Infamous 2 - $8
Killzone 2- $7
Killzone 3 - $7
Lego 3: Beyond Batman - $8
Lego Harry Potter Years 5-7 - $7
Lego The Hobbit - $9
LittleBigPlanet - $9
Madden 2011 - $5
Metro: Last Night - $8
Mortal Kombat Komplete Edition - $12
MLB the Show 10 - $4
MLB the Show 11 - $4
Monster Jam Path of Destruction - $20
NCAA Football 11 - $9
Sports Champions - $5
Tiger Woods PGA Tour 14 [Masters Historic Edition] - $23
Transformers Fall of Cybertron - $35
Transformers Rise of the Dark Spark - $13
Virtua Tennis 3 - $6
WWE 2K16 - $12
PS Vita
Lumines Electronic Symphony - $16
Need for Speed Most Wanted - $20
Sly Cooper Collection - $50
Sega 32X (all cart only)
Primal Rage - $50
Virtua Fighter - $24
Virtua Racing - $20
Sega Dreamcast Games (disc & manual only***; do not have original cases unless noted CIB)
Centipede - $7
Plasma Sword Night of Bilstein - $50
Psychic Force 2012 - $25
Ready 2 Rumble Boxing - $12
Resident Evil Code Veronica (CIB) - $40
Rippin Riders - $5
Sega Bass Fishing - $8
Sega Rally 2 Championship - $12
Speed Devils - $15
Sword of Berserk: Gut's Rage (game only) - $65
Trick Style - $7
Zombie Revenge - $30
Sega Genesis (**CIB unless noted)
Aladdin (cart + manual) - $10
Double Dragon (cart & box) - $45
Game Genie (loose + booklet) - $20
Hard Drivin' (Missing Manual) - $15
John Madden Football (cart + manual) - $20
Lemmings (CIB) - $30
MERCS (cart & box) - $35
NBA Jam T.E. (CIB) - $20
Prime Time NFL Football starring Deon Sanders (cart +manual) - $9
Ren & Stimpy Show: Stimpy's Intervention (CIB) - $20
Road Rash II (CIB) - $22
Robocop 3 (CIB) - $40
Streets of Rage (cart only) - $22
Super Off-Road (CIB) - $30
WWF Super Wrestlemania (CIB) - $20
X-Men (cart + manual) - $15
Zero Tolerance (CIB) - $35
Sega Master System (CIB unless noted)
Alex Kidd: The Lost Stars - $28
California Games (missing manual) - $20
Choplifter - $18
Ghostbusters - $25
Great Baseball - $10
Monopoly - $10
Parlour Games - $10
Pro Wrestling - $14
Rocky - $17
Space Harrier (missing manual) - $18
Shinobi (includes map; missing manual) - $30
Xbox (all CIB)
MechAssault 2 Lone Wolf (Limited Edition) - $8
Project Gotham Racing - $6
Xbox 360 (CIB)
Assassin's Creed - $6
Assasin's Creed II - $6
Asssasin's Creed III - $6
Battlefield Hardline Deluxe Edition - $10
Battlefield 3 Limited Edition - $6
Bioshock - $7
Bioshock Infinite - $5
Call of Duty World at War - $9
Call of Juarez: Blood Bound - $10
Civilization Revolution - $6
CSI Hard Evidence - $9
Fifa Soccer 10 - $5
Fifa Work Cup South Africa 2010 - $5
Game of Thrones - $11
Gears of War - $9
Halo 4 - $5
Injustice Gods Among Us - $5
L.A. Noire - $7
Mass Effect - $5
Mass Effect 2 - $5
N3 Ninety-Nine Nights - $20
NBA 2K12 - $5
NHL 10 - $3
NHL 14 - $6
Saints Row 2 - $10
Saints Row The Third - $5
Skate 3 - $6
Star Trek Legacy - $18
Star Wars Kinect - $7
Tiger Woods PGA Tour 2007 - $5
Tiger Woods PGA Tour 2008 - $5
Top Spin 3 - $6
Walking Dead Survival Instinct - $8
Wheel of Fortune - $14
Who Wants to Be a Millionaire -$5
Nintendo Wii (all CIB unless noted)
Animal Crossing City Folk - $20 (includes inserts but missing manual)
Celebrity Sports Showdown - $6
Guitar Hero World Tour - $18
Little League World Series Baseball 2008 - $10
Madden 2013 - $14
Mario Kart Wii - $35
Mario Super Sluggers (disc only) - $25
Mario Strikers Charged (disc only) - $10
NBA Live 09 All-Play - $5
New Super Mario Bros - $25
Super Monkey Ball Banana Blitz - $6
Super Smash Bros. Brawl - $20
Tony Hawk Downhill Jam - $5
Tony Hawk Shred Big Air - $5
Warioware Smooth Moves - $22
Wii Sports - $22
Wii Sports Resort - $30
Wheel of Fortune - $6
WWE Smackdown vs Raw 2009 - $7

My 7 year old has a classmate (same grade different class) who also plays in a few local sports teams who has cerebral palsy.
They have gone to school together and played on the same rec soccer team and tball/baseball league for 2 years now. At first he had lots of question as this boy was likely the first differently able child he’s been around. I felt nothing out of the ordinary. I explained that everyone is born different and differently abled. And how it’s great we can included him in sports and most school activities. He also has an uncle with ASD and an uncle with MS, one being mentally differently able and one being physically. So I tried to draw parallels there.
Last year we got a note from a teacher my son was mocking him and poking fun of him with other kids, we talked about how mean it was to act like that, and I had him write a letter apologizing to the parents and the boy. The parents were great and understanding. I thought maybe this was behind us.
This year he is playing against him in soccer and baseball and my son was very irritated that he got special treatment and was allowed to make kicks with out any defense around and how in baseball they let him run the bases and hit off the tee with out being out.
Last night his baseball coach catches him in the dugout mocking him and making fun of him with other kids. my son orchestrated and started it. They sat him out the rest of the game, and when his dad and I got home we were extremely displeased and let him know that and we sent him straight to bed.
My husband wants to pull him from baseball for the rest of the season. We just don’t get it, our son is held accountable, gets a lot of positive reinforcement and attention. He helps and is so sweet with his baby cousins and has never made a comment about his uncles and thier different abilities. We don’t bully or make comments about anyone’s bodies or differences .
Is there anything else we should do? Is my kid just an asshole??? The thought of my son being a bully makes me sick.

I (19M) was always lonely throughout my life. I never had friends in school and never took part in any co-curricular activities. I would be jealous of my classmates with them hanging out with friends and being able to talk to girls, so I decided that after my high school I will try to make friends in college.
In college I met a group of people who I thought could be my friends. We would talk and have fun together. We would joke about each other. Even there were 2 girls in our group and with their friendly nature made me comfortable to talk to girls. Even there was a guy in the group who I would hangout with a lot. We would sit together and go to eat food together in the canteen or outside college.
I even started talking to a girl. She was really sweet and cute to talk to and we would bitch about our professors and at once shared playlists with each other. She was the one who asked me for my Insta ID. She would look and smile at me and wave at me. It was amazing. I thought my college life is going to be way better than my school life.
But it all came crashing down. In October me and my friends bunked our classes and went to the sports arena to play games. We were playing darts. One of the 2 girls, let's call her S, jokingly told one of the guys in our group that she would hit him on his head with a dart. So I jokingly told her that I would hit her with the dart but I accidentally pointed at her breast. I was looking at her face so I didn't realize it.
She got offended. She took the other girl, let's call her Z, and told her everything about this. Z confronted me and started shouting at me in the sports arena attracting everybody's attention. The Sports Officer came running towards us. He heard the entire story and took my ID card and told them to write a letter against me to the Dean.
After the letter was written he took me and the girls to the Dean who thought of this as a minor incident and told us we are legally adults and coming to him with these petty complaints. Then they told the Dean about me taking photographs of them and leaking them.
The day before I clicked S's photos of her eating a banana in the presence of our friend group. She took it very sportingly as a joke and I uploaded them to our personal Whatsapp Group. Everyone of us including her were laughing and giggling. But she and Z told that I took them without permission. They even told that I was never a friend and I was an outsider.
Dean got me suspended for 15 days because the next day our vacation would start so throughout November I was in my home. My mother uses this incident as a weapon to scold me evey now and then when we have arguments. And the worst was my crush.
During the days of my suspension I was in contact with my crush. She would even send notes of the classes of that day everyday throughout the suspension, but she didn't know I got suspended. Then when I rejoined college and started attending classes I sat far to my former friend group and behind my crush and she ignored me. Completely.
Throughout the whole day she would ignore me. That broke my heart. I was very upset and regretful for my actions. I think that my crush stopped taking to me because she got to know about this incident and misunderstood me. I have been hating myself for not respecting boundaries. Now I am all alone seeing my classmates enjoying their friendships and relationships. I think I deserve this.

I (19M) was always lonely throughout my life. I never had friends in school and never took part in any co-curricular activities. I would be jealous of my classmates with them hanging out with friends and being able to talk to girls, so I decided that after my high school I will try to make friends in college.
In college I met a group of people who I thought could be my friends. We would talk and have fun together. We would joke about each other. Even there were 2 girls in our group and with their friendly nature made me comfortable to talk to girls. Even there was a guy in the group who I would hangout with a lot. We would sit together and go to eat food together in the canteen or outside college.
I even started talking to a girl. She was really sweet and cute to talk to and we would bitch about our professors and at once shared playlists with each other. She was the one who asked me for my Insta ID. She would look and smile at me and wave at me. It was amazing. I thought my college life is going to be way better than my school life.
But it all came crashing down. In October me and my friends bunked our classes and went to the sports arena to play games. We were playing darts. One of the 2 girls, let's call her S, jokingly told one of the guys in our group that she would hit him on his head with a dart. So I jokingly told her that I would hit her with the dart but I accidentally pointed at her breast. I was looking at her face so I didn't realize it.
She got offended. She took the other girl, let's call her Z, and told her everything about this. Z confronted me and started shouting at me in the sports arena attracting everybody's attention. The Sports Officer came running towards us. He heard the entire story and took my ID card and told them to write a letter against me to the Dean.
After the letter was written he took me and the girls to the Dean who thought of this as a minor incident and told us we are legally adults and coming to him with these petty complaints. Then they told the Dean about me taking photographs of them and leaking them.
The day before I clicked S's photos of her eating a banana in the presence of our friend group. She took it very sportingly as a joke and I uploaded them to our personal Whatsapp Group. Everyone of us including her were laughing and giggling. But she and Z told that I took them without permission. They even told that I was never a friend and I was an outsider.
Dean got me suspended for 15 days because the next day our vacation would start so throughout November I was in my home. My mother uses this incident as a weapon to scold me evey now and then when we have arguments. And the worst was my crush.
During the days of my suspension I was in contact with my crush. She would even send notes of the classes of that day everyday throughout the suspension, but she didn't know I got suspended. Then when I rejoined college and started attending classes I sat far to my former friend group and behind my crush and she ignored me. Completely.
Throughout the whole day she would ignore me. That broke my heart. I was very upset and regretful for my actions. I think that my crush stopped taking to me because she got to know about this incident and misunderstood me. I have been hating myself for not respecting boundaries. Now I am all alone seeing my classmates enjoying their friendships and relationships. I think I deserve this.

Caution: Long Post
The Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. is without doubt and still is to this day one of the most influential, powerful, and iconic figures in American history due to his steadfast and nonviolent commitment in the fight for Civil Rights, Equality, and Justice during Jim Crow Segregation in the United States. The highlight of his career as an activist came in 1963 in which he delivered his famous "I Have a Dream" speech in front of Lincoln Memorial in Washington, D.C. in which he envisioned a nation in which his children will be judged not by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character. This resulted in the Civil Rights Act of 1964 to be passed. Even after his assassination in 1968, his legacy inspired many similar Civil Rights Movements around the world.
Today, Martin Luther King, Jr. is hailed by both sides of the American Political Sphere as a Beacon of Hope on how to fight for Justice and Equality for all during turbulent times. But it's the Conservatives who constantly claim that they truly support him and follow his dream, especially in modern times and they've expressed it in a rather whitewashed and partisan fashion. The most obvious being their use of his "I Have a Dream" speech by quoting the one line that has often been cherry-picked and misinterpreted quite a lot in which they judge people not by skin but by their character. The main reason they do this is to give them the appearance that they are colorblind as their way of opposing racism. And in doing so, they consistently criticize Liberals of trying to divide the country into special interest groups and promote favoritism. As a result, they always claim that Dr. King is a Republican, let alone would've been one in this era given his views, along with the fact that he was a Christian. His niece, Alveda King even emphasized it herself.
Some of the ways that Conservatives try to supposedly live up to Dr. King's "Colorblind" Dream is by opposing supposed "Wokeness", Critical Race Theory, and the practice of Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion everywhere. They also express it by opposing Affirmative Action and the use of Racial Quotas when it comes to applying for schools, universities, and jobs because they believe it causes Reverse Discrimination. In terms of nonviolence, Conservatives express their disapproval of the Black Lives Matter movement. On the basis of Christianity, Conservatives believe that Dr. King supported a fixed moral code as indicated in his Letters from Birmingham Jail since he led with love and not racial hatred by changing the lives of people and not the laws itself, along with the notion of self-sufficiency. Seeing all this, it seems like Conservatives are really desperate to prove how much America has progressed in this post-racial world in order to debunk accusations that it isn't a racist country and that's why they always prop up Dr. King by claiming that they follow his dream and will continue to do so. Well.....up until now.
During this year's Martin Luther King Day, a string of prominent Conservative activists and organizations suddenly turned on him. Starting off with Charlie Kirk of the Youth Conservative Movement Turning Point USA, who launched a blistering anti-MLK campaign in which he supposedly dispelled the alleged myths surrounding his popularity. He accused Dr. King of being a "Bad Person" and that his "Sainthood will cause Black voters to realize it's being used against them to suppress the individual." He even went further by stating that "we made a huge mistake when we passed the Civil Rights Act in the 1960s" accusing it as "a way to get rid of the First Amendment". A while ago, the organization marketed the Conservative image of Dr. King when they sold $55 T-Shirts with his name as well as stickers of him with the words "Let Freedom Ring". Kirk was later joined by the Daily Wire's Matt Walsh who accused him of being a "communist". In fact, he railed against Dr. King a few years ago by accusing him of being a Womanizer, Adulterer, Plagiarizer, etc. Coming after Walsh was Human Events editor, conspiracy theorist, and fellow Turning Point USA alumna Jack Posobiec, who labeled Dr. King "a God of the Left" and stating that "the real legacy of the 1960s was enshrining Racial Discrimination and Race Consciousness into the Federal Bureaucracy." And finally, a popular Conservative Twitter account called "EndWokeness" called Dr. King "a Racial Marxist" because he "did not support a Colorblind Meritocracy" after it cited his quote on Wealth Distribution. What's even worse is that even non-White Conservatives hate him. Two examples include a commentator named Vince Everett Ellison and former football player and sports columnist, Jason Whitlock. The latest editions to the lineup of Black Guilt Conservatives, they railed against Dr. King and the passing of the Civil Rights by stating that they worsened the Black community by drifting them away from God into "Democratic Dependency". They even accused him of the same crimes as Walsh did.
With the sudden change in tone and emphasis from the Right against Dr. King, you have to ask yourself why they're doing this and what caused them to believe this way. And this is not an extremist fringe of the Right that some would expect to hear from. All of these are Mainstream Right-Wing Figures who have direct lineage to the GOP, including the current presidential nominee, Donald Trump. That's as Establishment you can get. Their remarks have been criticized by a lot of people from both sides and surprisingly by some Black Conservatives. One of them was Pastor Darrell Scott, a former faith advisor of Trump, who these days, is one of a few Black Conservatives who has been calling out other Black Conservatives for tearing down their own race in order to elevate their status among others, a very notorious habit of them. He criticized Kirk for inspiring a Hitler Youth. Another was Kimberly Klacik, who in 2020, gained viral for her campaign video stating that Black Lives don't matter to Democrats when she was running for Maryland's 7th Congressional District following the death of Civil Rights Leader, Elijah Cummings, who was the incumbent. She criticized Kirk for his remarks stating that his rhetoric will prevent Blacks from voting Republican. Even with that said, there have been instances in which Conservatives themselves have questioned the Civil Rights Act and many of them have been pretty negative. If you check out other Conservative websites and especially here on Reddit, many of their criticisms echo the same sentiments as those Pundits stating that it was unconstitutional and that in infringed on the First Amendment, particularly the Notion of Freedom of Association.
That being said, there is some silver lining to this. Now, that they exposed themselves for what they really of think Dr. King, I think it's time for them to admit that they never really liked him in the first place, let alone understood who he really was and what he really stood for. In fact, they never really liked him at all. All they did was whitewash him and cherry-pick his ideas and speech for own Partisan Agenda. Dr. King constantly talked about the notion of Black Pride and campaigned about the need for Reparations. He also supported Affirmative Action stating in 1965 that "a Society that has done something special against the Negro for hundreds of years must now do something special for the Negro. Dr. King realized that our society was created in a way that managed to disadvantage the many for the benefit the few, and that America's Racial Hierarchy was connected to its Class Hierarchy. He also had political beliefs that manifested through both Racial Reconciliation and Concrete Policy Changes that could help restructure and benefit a divided and unequal nation. This is the reason why he referred to himself as a Democratic Socialist as he wanted a "Radical Redistribution of Economic and Political Power". In fact, he argued that true Equality can only be achieved, not just through legal rights, but through an equal distribution of resources. This is evident when he said “Call it democracy, or call it democratic socialism, but there must be a better distribution of wealth within this country for all God’s children.” This is the exact vision that Vermont Independent Senator Bernie Sanders believed in. After all, he did participate in the March on Washington in 1963. In regards to Police Brutality, while Dr. King opposed violent protest, he did acknowledge that a Riot is the language of the Unheard and that it came from a place of Desperation. In fact, in his "I Have a Dream" Speech, he stated that Blacks could "never be satisfied as long as the Negro is the Victim of the Unspeakable Horrors of Police Brutality." After all, he was hounded by the FBI, was called a Communist, broke the law in protest of race-based Segregation and Violence, was thrown in jail, advocated Protests and Sit-Ins, opposed White Rule of Society, and was assassinated for his Race and his views on Race. Regarding the quote about the Content of Character from said speech, Dr. King's daughter, Bernice King stated that using solely that quote diminishes the purpose of the entire speech because her father's dream and work included "eradicating Racism, not ignoring it."
If anything, this goes to show that is Dr. King were around today, he would be heavily criticized for being Woke, politically correct, a Communist, a Race Hustler, and a member of the Radical Left. And we all know that the Right hates those ideologies passionately. But here's the thing, he never considered himself a Democrat, let alone a Republican. He was an Independent as he felt that both parties are the same. And reducing his legacy to a single quote diminishes the gains that he fought for and believed in. This especially goes to a lot of Conservatives out there who claim to follow his lead using that quote because they interpret them in a way that benefits them today than how he meant them back then. For you to claim that he didn't care about Skin Color is like saying Susan B. Anthony didn't care about Gender. And to those Conservatives who now hate him, including Black, I hope you're OK with people getting treated unfairly, including your own. Who knew being seen as an Equal is a Negative in your eyes.

There have been an increasing number of juniors visiting this sub asking for advice about writing essays. Below are some tips and advice for making your essay stand out as excellent. Feel free to ask questions because I will answer every single question in the comments.
I know from experience that many of you are struggling to identify a good topic for your essay. Conventional wisdom says to start by brainstorming a list of potential topics, and chances are, you have already started a mental list of ideas. You might think you only have a few choices for topics, based on your activities or experiences, or essay examples you read, or the rough draft you already started (or worse, that GPT started...). I advise, however, that you put down your list of topics and back away from it. Forget that exists for a moment. Seriously - thinking about this initial list tethers you to certain ideas that might not actually be your best options.
Now you can begin brainstorming with a clean slate.
Start with thinking about what you want to show in your entire application, not just one essay. Every single component in your app has one purpose – to tell more about YOU. Filling out the rest of the application by rote and focusing solely on the essay is short-sighted and will leave so much potential untapped in your application.

It's About You. Tell Your Story - And Be The Protagonist

An admissions officer’s goal is to understand you fully, in the context of your background and the rest of the applicant pool. They will begin this with assessing your academic abilities and potential. Then they will evaluate how you will fit into the student body they’re trying to curate. All of this can be somewhat broad and diverse and touch on several institutional goals. But they will dig deep to find out what each applicant is like, what your core values and motivations are, what kind of student you will be, how you will contribute to the vibrant and intellectual campus community they’re building, etc.
Your goal with essay brainstorming is to ascertain how to powerfully tell your story in a manner that will fit these criteria. The entirety of your application (again, not just one essay) aims to showcase your abilities, qualifications, and uncommon attributes as a person in a positive way. Before you begin outlining or writing your application, you must determine what is unique about you that will stand out to an admissions panel. All students are truly unique. Not one other student has the same combination of life experiences, personality, passions, or goals as you do. Your job in your application is to frame your unique personal attributes in a positive and compelling way. How will you fit on campus? What personal qualities, strengths, core values, talents, or different perspectives do you bring to the table? What stories, deeper motivations/beliefs, or formative experiences can you use to illustrate all of this?
It is always helpful to start with some soul-searching or self-examination. You might not immediately know what you want to share about yourself. It’s not a simple task to decide how to summarize your whole life and being in a powerful and eloquent way on your application. Introspection prior to starting your application takes additional time and effort rather than jumping straight into your first draft. But it is also a valuable method to start writing a winning application that stands out from the stack.
You'll see the advice everywhere that all essay prompts are really about the same thing - you. The goal of each essay then is to showcase who you are, what matters to you, and how you think. I guarantee if you're on this sub enough, you'll hear the advice to "show, don't tell" when writing about yourself. But what does this mean really, and how do you do it well? How do you even get started on an essay that does this?

Introspection Questions

It’s often easiest to start thinking in terms of superlatives, especially those related to personal insights -- what are the most meaningful things about you, and what do you value the most? Here is a list of questions to help you brainstorm broadly before you narrow down your focus for writing:

• What are your interests?
  
• What sparks your curiosity?
  
• About what topics do you enjoy reading?
  
• With whom do you enjoy spending time? Who has impacted your life the most?
  
• Reflect upon “superlatives” in your life. What moments were most memorable, formative, enlightening, enjoyable, or valuable? What physical possessions, experiences, dreams, or lessons could make your superlatives list?
  
• Stop and think about what things, people, or circumstances in your life are really unique, fascinating, or outlandish. Are there any that really have a lot of "cultural flavor" (whatever your culture is)?
  

I have a free introspection worksheet with over 100 questions like this designed to help you find ideas worth exploring in your essays. You can find it on the A2C Discord or download it directly here.

Find Your Story And Arc

Think of a small anecdote or story from your life that you could share that serves as a microcosm of who you are and what is important to you. It will massively help you narrow this down and find a gem of a story if you first start by thinking about your application arc or theme. This is the one-phrase summary of your entire application. It could be "brilliant entrepreneur who started her own successful business" or "talented athlete who wants to study economics and finance as they pertain to sports", or even "avid baker whose hobby sparked an interest in chemistry". It doesn't have to be related to your intended major, but it can help your arc be stronger and clearer if it is.
Once you have an arc determined and a story to share, think about what you want that story to say about you. This is where it can help to think of this as something you would share on a date - what impression does it make about you to the reader? Once you know this, start showing, not telling this attribute of yourself through your story. For example, instead of saying that you're compassionate toward others, you show an example of a time you were compassionate, then elaborate on why, and what it means to you.

Essay Brainstorming Techniques

If you are having trouble finding a story, or simply have writer’s block once you have picked your topic, here are some ideas to get your juices flowing:

• Stream of consciousness writing -- Start writing whatever is in your head, and don’t stop for 30 minutes. You probably won’t use what you just wrote for your essay, but it will help you find a starting point.
  
• Journaling -- Answer the prompt as if you were writing in a journal. This will get you in the habit of writing about yourself and establish comfort with the concept. It will also take you to a new level of introspection and self-awareness.
  
• Twitter X style -- Write several rapid-fire responses to the prompt in 280 characters or less. Choose an idea from these responses to expound upon in your essay.
  
• Read each essay prompt, then go through your introspection worksheet responses and connect the stories and insights to one or more of the prompts. Some students like using color coding to visually see how their different ideas might work together.
  

Why Essays Matter

Here's the thing a lot of people don't realize about college admission: it's not an award for being the smartest, most accomplished, or most impressive. It's an invitation to join a community. Far too many students think that if they can just show that they're smart enough, they'll get in. Yale even says right on their admissions website that 75% of their applicants are academically qualified to succeed at Yale. But only ~4% are getting in. That should tell you that they're looking for more than just top tier test scores and grades. To be perfectly clear, you will need top tier grades and (optionally) test scores to show that you're qualified, and the vast majority of my students come to me with this part already in the bank. But what sets the admits apart? It's personal insight - sharing who you are, how you think, what matters to you, and how you engage community. You can't just say "/IAmVerySmart, please admit me," or even "I did a cool thing guys! Isn't that neat!" You need to go deeper and show them your core values, personal strengths, motivations, aspirations, character traits, foundational beliefs, personality, etc. And you need to do it in a charming, winsome way that makes them like you and want to invite you to join their community.
So how do I get students to do this? All of my students complete that introspection worksheet. We go through it and find the stories, examples, anecdotes, conversations, memories, relationships, and other things from their life that will help us craft a strong and personally insightful narrative. We also make lists of the values, strengths, and key personal qualities we want to showcase. Once we have some topics, outlines, abstracts, or rough drafts, we talk about which stories to tell where, how to tell them well, and what details to include to present the best they have to offer. Then we refine, edit, polish, and enhance over and over until the story sings, but more importantly shows their heart and soul. We also go through all the other application components to ensure consistency, quality, and distinctiveness.
Here's why this works so well: at most highly selective colleges there is a primary reader (or 2-3) who will review everything first and then present it to the admissions committee, who then votes on whether to admit you. That presentation typically goes one of three ways:

1. Total enthusiasm, energy, and excitement. They strongly advocate for admission and paint a clear picture of how you will contribute to their goals and community. Everyone in the room picks up on that energy and is leaning forward in their chairs, looking for reasons to admit you. This is quite rare, generally less than 5 out of every 100 applications, even among those which are "fully qualified." When you do this right, you show depth, meaning, and valuable personal insights so the reviewer is learning about who you are and how you might engage the community they're curating. You come alive off the page as a person, not just another file.
   
2. Business as usual. You're another great applicant in a pile of great applicants. They share a basic review of the facts, your profile, stats, strengths, weaknesses, etc. Maybe someone on the committee finds something they love, and they really push for admission. More likely, not and you get deferred/waitlisted even though there wasn't anything "wrong" with your application. They just didn't love you enough to commit.
   
3. "Here's a stack of 20 applications that I didn't find all that compelling, so we won't present them individually, but you guys are the committee and you make the decisions. So let me know if there are any you want to talk about." In this case, unless there's a letter of endorsement from an athletics coach or your last name matches several buildings on campus, you're probably not getting additional consideration, much less admission. They will regret to inform you.
   

Everything we're doing is designed to help them get to know themselves, present the best they have to offer, and land in that first group. Having top tier essays is the single best way to get there. Get started on brainstorming in the next few weeks so you'll have time to get a few essays completed over the summer.

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Father's Day is a special occasion dedicated to honoring fathers and celebrating their contributions to their families and society. It's a day to express gratitude and love for the men who have played a pivotal role in our lives. While the date of Father’s Day varies across different countries, the sentiment remains universally cherished. Here’s a guide to when Father's Day is celebrated around the world and some ideas on how to make it special.
Father's Day in the United States and Many Other Countries
In the United States, Father’s Day is celebrated on the third Sunday in June. This tradition is followed by many other countries, including the United Kingdom, Canada, India, and most European and Latin American countries. For 2024, Father’s Day in these regions falls on June 16th.
Origin of Father’s Day in the United States
The idea of Father's Day in the U.S. was inspired by Mother's Day. The first Father's Day celebration was held on June 19, 1910, in Spokane, Washington, spearheaded by Sonora Smart Dodd, who wanted to honor her father, a Civil War veteran and single parent who raised six children. It wasn’t until 1972, however, that Father’s Day was officially recognized as a national holiday by President Richard Nixon.
Father’s Day in Different Parts of the World

When is Father's Day: Celebrating Dads Around the World

Father's Day is a special occasion dedicated to honoring fathers and celebrating their contributions to their families and society. It's a day to express gratitude and love for the men who have played a pivotal role in our lives. While the date of Father’s Day varies across different countries, the sentiment remains universally cherished. Here’s a guide to when Father's Day is celebrated around the world and some ideas on how to make it special.
Father's Day in the United States and Many Other Countries
In the United States, Father’s Day is celebrated on the third Sunday in June. This tradition is followed by many other countries, including the United Kingdom, Canada, India, and most European and Latin American countries. For 2024, Father’s Day in these regions falls on June 16th.
Origin of Father’s Day in the United States
The idea of Father's Day in the U.S. was inspired by Mother's Day. The first Father's Day celebration was held on June 19, 1910, in Spokane, Washington, spearheaded by Sonora Smart Dodd, who wanted to honor her father, a Civil War veteran and single parent who raised six children. It wasn’t until 1972, however, that Father’s Day was officially recognized as a national holiday by President Richard Nixon.
Father’s Day in Different Parts of the World

1. Australia and New Zealand: Father's Day is celebrated on the first Sunday in September. This year, it will be observed on September 1st.
2. Brazil: Known as Dia dos Pais, Father's Day in Brazil is celebrated on the second Sunday in August, aligning with the Catholic feast day of St. Joachim, the father of the Virgin Mary. This year, it falls on August 11th.
3. Germany: In Germany, Father's Day, or Vatertag, is celebrated on Ascension Day, which is the 40th day of Easter. It’s also known as Men's Day (Männertag), and this year, it will be celebrated on May 30th.
4. Thailand: Father’s Day in Thailand is celebrated on December 5th, coinciding with the birthday of the late King Bhumibol Adulyadej. It is a day of national celebration and respect for fathers.
5. Russia: In Russia, Father’s Day is observed as Defender of the Fatherland Day on February 23rd. It honors men in general, especially those serving in the military.

How to Make Father’s Day Special
Regardless of when you celebrate Father’s Day, here are some thoughtful ways to make the day memorable for your dad:

1. Personalized Gifts: Custom-made gifts such as photo albums, engraved watches, or personalized mugs can add a special touch.
2. Quality Time: Spend the day doing something your dad loves, whether it’s fishing, hiking, watching a movie, or playing a sport.
3. Cook a Special Meal: Treat your dad to a homemade meal with his favorite dishes. You could also host a barbecue or picnic if the weather permits.
4. Handwritten Letters: Write a heartfelt letter expressing your gratitude and love. Sometimes, words from the heart mean more than any store-bought gift.
5. Experience Gifts: Plan an experience rather than a physical gift. Consider activities like a day trip, a concert, or a cooking class.
6. Virtual Celebration: If you’re far away, set up a video call and celebrate together virtually. You can still share a meal, play games, or watch a movie simultaneously.

Conclusion
Father's Day is a wonderful opportunity to show appreciation for the fathers and father figures in our lives. Whether your dad is near or far, there are countless ways to make the day special. Understanding when Father’s Day is celebrated around the world helps us appreciate the diverse ways in which this important day is honored. No matter the date, the essence of Father’s Day lies in expressing love, gratitude, and respect for the men who have guided, supported, and loved us unconditionally.
Father's Day is a special occasion dedicated to honoring fathers and celebrating their contributions to their families and society. It's a day to express gratitude and love for the men who have played a pivotal role in our lives. While the date of Father’s Day varies across different countries, the sentiment remains universally cherished. Here’s a guide to when Father's Day is celebrated around the world and some ideas on how to make it special.
Father's Day in the United States and Many Other Countries
In the United States, Father’s Day is celebrated on the third Sunday in June. This tradition is followed by many other countries, including the United Kingdom, Canada, India, and most European and Latin American countries. For 2024, Father’s Day in these regions falls on June 16th.
Origin of Father’s Day in the United States
The idea of Father's Day in the U.S. was inspired by Mother's Day. The first Father's Day celebration was held on June 19, 1910, in Spokane, Washington, spearheaded by Sonora Smart Dodd, who wanted to honor her father, a Civil War veteran and single parent who raised six children. It wasn’t until 1972, however, that Father’s Day was officially recognized as a national holiday by President Richard Nixon.
Father’s Day in Different Parts of the World

When is Father's Day: Celebrating Dads Around the World

Father's Day is a special occasion dedicated to honoring fathers and celebrating their contributions to their families and society. It's a day to express gratitude and love for the men who have played a pivotal role in our lives. While the date of Father’s Day varies across different countries, the sentiment remains universally cherished. Here’s a guide to when Father's Day is celebrated around the world and some ideas on how to make it special.
Father's Day in the United States and Many Other Countries
In the United States, Father’s Day is celebrated on the third Sunday in June. This tradition is followed by many other countries, including the United Kingdom, Canada, India, and most European and Latin American countries. For 2024, Father’s Day in these regions falls on June 16th.
Origin of Father’s Day in the United States
The idea of Father's Day in the U.S. was inspired by Mother's Day. The first Father's Day celebration was held on June 19, 1910, in Spokane, Washington, spearheaded by Sonora Smart Dodd, who wanted to honor her father, a Civil War veteran and single parent who raised six children. It wasn’t until 1972, however, that Father’s Day was officially recognized as a national holiday by President Richard Nixon.
Father’s Day in Different Parts of the World

1. Australia and New Zealand: Father's Day is celebrated on the first Sunday in September. This year, it will be observed on September 1st.
2. Brazil: Known as Dia dos Pais, Father's Day in Brazil is celebrated on the second Sunday in August, aligning with the Catholic feast day of St. Joachim, the father of the Virgin Mary. This year, it falls on August 11th.
3. Germany: In Germany, Father's Day, or Vatertag, is celebrated on Ascension Day, which is the 40th day of Easter. It’s also known as Men's Day (Männertag), and this year, it will be celebrated on May 30th.
4. Thailand: Father’s Day in Thailand is celebrated on December 5th, coinciding with the birthday of the late King Bhumibol Adulyadej. It is a day of national celebration and respect for fathers.
5. Russia: In Russia, Father’s Day is observed as Defender of the Fatherland Day on February 23rd. It honors men in general, especially those serving in the military.

How to Make Father’s Day Special
Regardless of when you celebrate Father’s Day, here are some thoughtful ways to make the day memorable for your dad:

1. Personalized Gifts: Custom-made gifts such as photo albums, engraved watches, or personalized mugs can add a special touch.
2. Quality Time: Spend the day doing something your dad loves, whether it’s fishing, hiking, watching a movie, or playing a sport.
3. Cook a Special Meal: Treat your dad to a homemade meal with his favorite dishes. You could also host a barbecue or picnic if the weather permits.
4. Handwritten Letters: Write a heartfelt letter expressing your gratitude and love. Sometimes, words from the heart mean more than any store-bought gift.
5. Experience Gifts: Plan an experience rather than a physical gift. Consider activities like a day trip, a concert, or a cooking class.
6. Virtual Celebration: If you’re far away, set up a video call and celebrate together virtually. You can still share a meal, play games, or watch a movie simultaneously.

Father's Day from Rakhi.com is a wonderful opportunity to show appreciation for the fathers and father figures in our lives. Whether your dad is near or far, there are countless ways to make the day special. Understanding when Father’s Day is celebrated around the world helps us appreciate the diverse ways in which this important day is honored. No matter the date, the essence of Father’s Day lies in expressing love, gratitude, and respect for the men who have guided, supported, and loved us unconditionally.

So, a person suffering from this rare disease is distinguished by the fact that:

1. As a matter of principle, he does not play games where less than 45 keys are used. 2. He haven’t cleaned his mouse for two years (if he haven’t forgotten what it is). 3. Added the line FastMore=true to config.sys. 4. He's very surprised that nothing has changed because of this. 5. In any game, having saved, exits and takes the save to another directory. 6. When he tries to type something in a text editor, it only produces lines like Za5 ws Synnn, etc. 7. He is sincerely surprised and upset that the letters in the books are the same color. 8. He almost forgot the native alphabet. 9. Shies away from flashing neon signs. 10. Dreams of going to Egypt. 11. And He have already prepared the most important thing on this trip - a blowtorch. 12. Shows interest in the national cuisines of Asian and African countries. 13. Collects colorful balls. 14. Dreams of repainting the gray cubes in the city Garden black. 15. For this purpose, he regularly leaves small change there. 16. Half of his scholarship is spent on this. 17. The second half of the scholarship goes to beer, which he calls "light-yellow bubbling potion". 18. Was caught by the night watchman of the cemetery with a pickaxe in his hands. 19. Was immediately released when he explained that he was looking for Nonnak's sword. He was not the first one to come there for this. 20. Tries not to read the same book several times, afraid that it will disappear. 21. Never goes to the city center. 22. He explains it this way: “There are statues there, but I don’t have a phase dagger.” 23. Wonders how something called C++ can exist. 24. Tries to be C--. 25. Asks all bookstores and libraries for Scrolls of Great Identify. 26. In the institute canteen he orders only Potions of Gain Attributes 

TW: salute mentale ciao a tutti, scrivo questo post essenzialmente per sfogarmi e forse anche per trovare conforto. sono sempre stata molto brava a scuola, andavo bene in tutto e mi trovavo bene ad avere mille impegni extra scolastici e poi dedicarmi anche allo studio. Ho sempre pensato che avrei dedicato la mia vita a studiare, perché mi è sempre piaciuto, genuinamente. I miei genitori hanno puntato molto sulla mia educazione, ma anche sulla mia apertura a tutte le esperienze che potevo fare. Mi hanno spinto a impegnarmi politicamente, a fare molte delle attività extrascolastiche, a fare sport, a viaggiare, a conoscere le lingue. Molto spesso è capitato che mi forzassero a fare esperienze che poi alla fine sono stata felice di aver fatto. Ho avuto molte opportunità e io in cambio sono sempre stata super diligente, mi sono sempre impegnata al massimo in tutto quello che ho fatto. Fino al liceo. Nonostante al liceo la mia vita fosse più o meno “perfetta” vista da fuori, non è stato facile. Ho il netto ricordo di essermi fatta male per la prima volta a quattordici anni perché mia madre non era contenta che io avessi preso un voto inferiore rispetto all’altra secchiona della classe. E da lì in poi per tutto il liceo ho continuato a farmi male per punirmi. Ho avuto il mio primo attacco di panico in seconda liceo e da lì non ho più smesso di soffrire di ansia. Ora sono al settimo (eh già, settimo) anno di fisica, mi mancano due esami (tesi fatta, ma che importa), ho voti mediocri e sono diventata completamente indifferente verso lo studio. Ogni volta che mi viene chiesto cosa faccio tergiverso, mi devo scusare non solo con gli altri ma anche con me stessa. Devo farmi l’elenco per ricordarmi perché sono qui (e ora lo farò anche a voi): scelgo fisica perché “a fare archeologia non si hanno sbocchi”, anche se poi il vero motivo era di scegliere la cosa più lontana dalla mia opprimentissima madre (laurea in lettere alla normale di pisa, super cervellone umanista però coi numeri proprio non ce la fa), in modo che non potesse intervenire nel mio percorso universitario. Per come mi hanno cresciuto i miei credo anche di aver scelto fisica per il prestigio di una laurea in fisica. Al primo anno di università non riesco a stare al passo con gli standard di mia madre ( mi aveva imposto media del 27 con voti non minori di 26, quello che doveva fare lei alla normale di pisa), razionalizzo ma comincio a stare male, fino a che il medico di base e i miei genitori, preoccupati, non mi mandano in terapia e comincio a prendere farmaci per curare la depressione e l’ansia. La situazione continua a peggiorare, di mezzo c’è il covid e peggiorano i rapporti con la mia famiglia. Continuo comunque a studiare sempre, a fare “tutto quello che dovrei fare”, senza ovviamente ottenere risultati. Dopo che divento ufficialmente fuori corso inizia il bullismo: sono un fallimento, faccio solo spendere soldi (per tasse universitarie e medicine e dottori), faccio star male tutti con la mia malattia (che nessuno riconosce come tale in realtà, pensano siano i miei capricci). Nessuno a parte i miei e i miei fratelli deve sapere che sono fuoricorso e che sto male, vedo mia madre mentire davanti a domande di parenti e amici perché si vergogna ad avermi come figlia. Non posso mollare l’università perché se non ho il foglio di carta in mano non valgo niente (parafrasando qualcosa che mi dissero i miei all’epoca), appena riesco a trovare qualche lavoretto la loro insistenza nel dirmi che mi devo dedicare allo studio e che non ho bisogno di soldi mi porta ad avere attacchi di panico continui fino a che non sono costretta a mollare il lavoro. Dopo cinque anni di terapie farmacologiche e psicologiche che non funzionano (in tutto questo mia madre mi ha fatto interrompere le cure più volte, continuando a ripetere che non serve a niente né psicologa ne psichiatra) provo il su****io tre volte in un anno. Finalmente danno un nome a quello che mi fa stare male e inizio cure più adeguate. ora mi mancano gli ultimi due esami come ho detto. molte cose sono migliorate, molte sono peggiorate. Io non so se riuscirò mai a darli sti due esami, la pressione è enorme e la vergogna indescrivibile. L’unica strada comunque è finire sta tragedia che è l’università e trovare un modo per sorridere, lontano dagli ambienti tossici che mi hanno portato a toccare il fondo. Fisica mi fa schifo, vorrei solo finire e cambiare tutto. Continuo a pensare a “come sarebbe stato se” ma non si può cambiare il passato. L’unica cosa che posso fare, quando trovo gente fuoricorso, è trattarli esattamente come avrei voluto essere trattata io, con un po’ di comprensione. Mi hanno detto “meglio un asino vivo che un dottore morto”, ma il punto è che non si è asini se si è indietro con gli esami, ognuno ha il suo percorso e le sue motivazioni e l’intelligenza non si misura con i voti, ,con la performance. Immagino che mia madre, nonostante la normale di pisa, non faccia chissà che impressione di genialità dal mio racconto. Grazie per avermi letto, è stato veramente importante questo sfogo.

1. Sonder: The protagonist, while people-watching in a crowded city square, experiences a profound sonder moment, realizing the intricate stories of those around them.
   
2. Énouement: On their 30th birthday, the protagonist reflects on the énouement of their life, pondering the unexpected twists and turns that led them to this moment.
   
3. Chrysalism: During a cozy thunderstorm, the protagonist finds solace in their home, reveling in the chrysalism of raindrops tapping on the window.
   
4. Monachopsis: Attending a high-society event, the protagonist, feeling out of place, grapples with monachopsis in a sea of unfamiliar faces.
   
5. Liberosis: After a life-changing event, the protagonist embraces liberosis, letting go of trivial concerns and embarking on a minimalist lifestyle.
   
6. Vellichor: Exploring an old, dusty library, the protagonist inhales the vellichor of aged books, each telling a story of bygone eras.
   
7. Anecdoche: In the midst of a lively party, the protagonist engages in an anecdoche, trying to share a personal story amid the chaotic chatter.
   
8. Jouska: The protagonist engages in a silent jouska, rehearsing a conversation with a loved one that they never have the courage to voice.
   
9. Nighthawk: Alone in their thoughts during a sleepless night, the protagonist experiences nighthawk, contemplating the choices that brought them to this insomnia.
   
10. Occhiolism: Gazing at the vast night sky, the protagonist grapples with occhiolism, feeling infinitesimally small in the grand cosmos.
    
11. Lachesism: The protagonist, seeking a thrill, faces lachesism head-on by participating in extreme sports, craving the adrenaline rush.
    
12. Rubatosis: During a moment of anxiety, the protagonist becomes acutely aware of their own heartbeat, experiencing rubatosis in a tense situation.
    
13. Exulansis: Unable to convey a deeply personal experience, the protagonist faces exulansis, resigning to the solitude of their unshared story.
    
14. Sonderlust: Inspired by wanderlust, the protagonist embraces sonderlust, setting off on a journey to explore diverse cultures and connect with strangers.
    
15. Limerence: The protagonist, captivated by someone new, grapples with the intoxicating effects of limerence, navigating the complexities of infatuation.
    
16. Altschmerz: The protagonist, burdened by the weight of recurring issues, confronts altschmerz and seeks a new perspective on long-standing challenges.
    
17. Chiasmus: Engaging in a heated debate, the protagonist skillfully uses chiasmus to convey a powerful argument, leaving their opponent speechless.
    
18. Hiraeth: Visiting their childhood home after years away, the protagonist experiences hiraeth, longing for the simplicity of bygone days.
    
19. Xenization: Immersed in a foreign land, the protagonist grapples with xenization, navigating cultural differences and seeking a sense of belonging.
    
20. Petrichor: Walking through a rejuvenated forest after a rainstorm, the protagonist relishes in the petrichor, a reminder of nature's resilience.
    
21. Ineffable: Confronted with an indescribable beauty, the protagonist struggles with ineffable emotions, unable to capture the experience in words.
    
22. Resfeber: As they prepare for a significant journey, the protagonist feels resfeber, a mix of nervousness and excitement, anticipating the unknown.
    
23. Avenoir: Reflecting on a lost love, the protagonist yearns for avenoir, a glimpse into an alternate future where the relationship flourished.
    
24. Adronitis: Attending a crowded party, the protagonist experiences adronitis, the frustration of struggling to connect with others in the social chaos.
    
25. Chrysoprase: Discovering a hidden gem, the protagonist feels chrysoprase, an unexpected surge of joy and delight in the midst of daily life.
    
26. Fernweh: Looking at a world map, the protagonist succumbs to fernweh, a deep desire to explore distant lands and experience the unknown.
    
27. Zephyr: Standing on a cliff overlooking the ocean, the protagonist feels the gentle zephyr, contemplating the ephemeral nature of life.
    
28. Torschlusspanik: Approaching a significant life milestone, the protagonist grapples with torschlusspanik, fearing the narrowing of opportunities as time passes.
    
29. Cavil: Engaging in a philosophical discussion, the protagonist delights in cavil, exploring nuanced arguments and challenging conventional wisdom.
    
30. Mamihlapinatapai: Locked in a prolonged gaze with a potential romantic interest, the protagonist experiences mamihlapinatapai, the silent communication of mutual desire.
    
31. Nefelibata: The protagonist, lost in creative pursuits, embraces nefelibata, living in the clouds of their imagination and artistic expression.
    
32. Ubuntu: Faced with a communal challenge, the protagonist draws strength from ubuntu, a sense of shared humanity and collective support.
    
33. Boketto: Staring out of a window, the protagonist engages in boketto, lost in contemplation and daydreaming.
    
34. Hygge: Creating a cozy reading nook, the protagonist immerses themselves in hygge, finding comfort and contentment in simple pleasures.
    
35. Amae: Seeking reassurance, the protagonist experiences amae, leaning on loved ones for emotional support and connection.
    
36. Ukiyo: The protagonist, embracing a carefree lifestyle, embodies ukiyo, reveling in the fleeting pleasures of the present moment.
    
37. Sankofa: Confronted with personal growth, the protagonist embraces sankofa, learning from past experiences to shape a brighter future.
    
38. La douleur exquise: Receiving an unrequited love letter, the protagonist grapples with la douleur exquise, the exquisite pain of wanting someone unattainable.
    
39. Mudita: Witnessing a friend's success, the protagonist feels mudita, genuine joy and celebration for the happiness of others.
    
40. Yūgen: In a moment of deep introspection, the protagonist senses yūgen, an awareness of profound beauty and mystery in the universe.
    
41. Ikinokori: Surviving a life-threatening situation, the protagonist feels ikinokori, a heightened appreciation for the gift of life.
    
42. Ephemeral: Observing a butterfly's brief existence, the protagonist reflects on the ephemeral nature of beauty and life.
    
43. Thalassophile: Standing on a serene beach, the protagonist embraces their thalassophile nature, finding solace and connection with the sea.
    
44. Psithurism: Camping in a peaceful forest, the protagonist listens to the soothing psithurism of leaves rustling in the wind.
    
45. Obfuscate: Navigating a complex political situation, the protagonist strategically uses obfuscation to protect vital information.
    

Discord: Lord of Rats
Reddit: Is_Me_
Name: Lyonel Grandison
Age: 24
Cultural Group: Stormlander
Appearance: Lyn is a strongly built man, standing at just over 6ft tall with a strong chest. He sports a mane of thick, golden blonde hair that falls just before his neck alongside a neatly trimmed and groomed beard. Lyonel is known to be a man of few smiles, almost always having a stern expression affixed to his face and a cold look in his eyes. He is rarely seen out of his armour, simple steel plate mail chased with gold, and is never seen without his cloak which presents his personal coat of arms. The sleeping lion of House Grandison encased in the fiery heart of R’hllor.
Traits: Strong
Skills: Swords (e), Andal Knight, Vanguard, Essosi Blademaster
Talents: Dancing, Linguistics, Theology
Negative Traits: n/a
Starting Title(s): Lord of Grandview, the Red
Starting Location: Opening Event
Biography
Lyonel was born to Lord Jon Grandison and Lady Aelinor Swann in the first year of Targaryen rule. Lyonel quickly proved himself to be a hot-tempered child, getting into constant fights with his younger brother Balon which they oft times settled through sparring. Through this, Lyonel quickly found his love for the sword and shield and his father, ever a man to encourage a martial inclination, made sure to fill his halls with stories of the Knight of Ninestars and the Winged Knight.
Lyonel’s relationship with his father began to strain when he was four-and-ten. Living in House Grandison’s seat of Grandview, at the mouth of the Dornish Marches, Lyn found himself surrounded by those who loathed their southern neighbours and resented the rising Bastard of Blackhaven for marrying one such woman. Feelings he himself simply couldn’t agree with. He had always been fascinated by the Dornish, their history, their culture, their wine and most of all their people. This tolerance clashed with his father on many occasions, a fact that only drove Lyonel towards the Dornish more.
Two years later, Lyonel joined a host led by Jon to venture south towards Blackhaven, a feigned show of support for the bastard that had taken root. There, in the depths of the Marches, Lyonel and Balon snuck away from camp and found themselves in the company of two commonfolk. Wyl and his older sister, Myriah. The sets of siblings became close companions, with Lyn and Myriah quickly becoming smitten with each other. A fact that they fought to keep hidden from his father for years. But nothing remains hidden forever.
The fury Jon Grandison flew into at his son bedding not only a common girl, but a Dornish common girl is often reserved for plays and works of art. He threatened to disinherit his son if he didn’t end the relationship immediately, something that Lyonel wasn’t willing to do. So Lyn thought that he must get his way in a manner even his father must respect, a duel. Lyonel thought it flawless. His father respected nothing if not martial prowess and surely the gods would support the case of true love fighting against cruel discrimination. So when Lyonel awoke in his bed with his head pounding, his father smug and his love missing, he found himself at the greatest loss of his life.
Lyonel was never a pious man. He rarely visited the Sept and found the lore of the Seven mind numbing but he had always believed, and always believed that they were good. With his faith and heart broken, he couldn’t stand to be around his father any longer and set off for the land where the Seven’s reach hadn’t taken root. Essos. Upon his twentieth nameday, Lyonel set off from a dock along the Sea of Dorne for the Free City of Pentos.
He quickly found shelter in the home of Ario Oratyrys, a merchant native to the city, who was more than eager to house Lyn and his companions, if only for the coin they brought in. On the third night after their arrival, Lyonel left in the dead of night and wandered the streets aimlessly. Eventually finding himself before the Great Temple of R’hllor and there he felt the heat of the fires and heard the crackling of the wood and found something that he had never found with the Seven. A calling. Lyonel returned the following morning a zealot, with a red priestess named Bellenora by his side.
And for the next few years of his life, Lyonel remained in Pentos studying the lore of his new god, and others besides, learning the languages of the Free Cities and an Essosi flair to his formidable sword skills. This peaceful life remained until one fateful morning, Lyonel received a letter from his brother detailing that their father had died and called him to return to Grandview to take the seat that was rightfully his. Filled with his newfound sense of duty and purpose, he set off for his ancestral home.
Timeline
1 AC: Birth of Lyonel Grandison
5 AC: Birth of Balon Grandison
10 AC: Lyonel discovers his love of swordplay and knightly culture
15 AC: Jon and Lyonel’s relationship begins to sour over the Dornish
17 AC: Jon leads party to Blackhaven, Lyonel meets Myriah and Wyl, Lyonel and Myriah begin their relationship
20AC: Jon discovers Myriah and Lyonel’s relationship, Lyonel duels Jon and loses, Myriah disappears (presumed dead)
21 AC: Lyonel departs with Wyl for Pentos, Lyonel meets Ario, Lyonel begins to follow R’hllor under the tutelage of Bellenora
24 AC: Jon dies, Lyonel returns from Pentos with his companions and becomes Lord of Grandview
25 AC: Present
Archetyped NPCs
Ser Balon Grandison (Master-at-Arms) {20}: Brother to Lyonel, wields a halberd which was a coming of age gift from Lyonel
Ser Wyl of Grandview (Marksman) {21}: Sister to Myriah and Lyonel’s closest companion, wields a bow and wears armour of boiled leather and crimson cloth
Bellenora (Scholar) {30}: Priestess of R’hllor who taught Lyonel about the faith, wears red silks and crimson ribbons in her black hair
Ser Harlan Staedmon (Tourney Knight) {19}: “Younger” of the Staedmon twins who served briefly under Lyonel’s father, wields a greatsword and is considered the more passionate of the two
Ser Harrold Staedmon (General) {19}: “Elder” of the Staedmon twins, favours an axe and shield but often works with a sword
Ario Oratyrys (Trader) {52}: Pentoshi merchant who took a shine to the dower Lyonel, always dresses in excessive fineries and has multiple rings across both of his hands
Lord Boris Staedmon (Castellan) {45}: Father of the twins and Castellan of Grandview under Jon’s rule, wears an tattered eye patch over on his right eye

Demographics: African American Male, first gen. 3.0 gpa/33 act (school doesn’t do rankings)
Cofounder of coding/stem related startup releasing this summer (introduced to my local university)
Internship at Chase Bank over the summer (With letter of rec)
Extracurriculars: Vp of Multi inclusion Club (best buddies) Cofounder of my schools Calisthenic club (first one started in the school district) 3 year sports editor for school publication (featuring additional live coverage on Division 1 football and basketball) Journalism portfolio page also created 4 year member Bpa member 2 years Varsity Football 4 years soccer (2 years varsity)
Volunteering: Salvation army (food drives)/ nonprofit organization that distributes home furnished goods for homeless and in need.
Essays yet to be drafted.
Also forgot to mention my older sister attends Northwestern so legacy connection there.
Aims: t-40 Northwestern ED, Babson, BC, Tufts, Nova, Rutgers to name a few.
Open to all feedback on things to improve/ecs to really really focus on to make my app stand out more. Also open to essay suggestions!