Sore neck sore throat fever

I (22F) thought I was pregnant recently. My breasts were sore and tender and felt fuller and firmer than normal, which started about 2-3 weeks ago. I also was having cramps that felt similar to menstrual cramps for that amount of time. I was nauseated, dizzy, and had trouble keeping food down. I was going to the bathroom constantly too. I had a lot of discharge, normal color and smell, but I don’t normally have much of that in my cycle. Overall, I also just had a feeling that it wasn’t PMS symptoms (usually those only begin the week before my period, not 2-3 weeks before like this did).
I took a pregnancy test a few days ago and it came out negative, but this was before a missed period (it was 4 weeks from my last menstruation but I had 2 more weeks before I was due for my next one).
Yesterday I started my “period”, but it’s extreme heavy flow. I bleed through overnight pads in less than two hours, and I’ve never seen this much clotting before. The bleeding is a normal color, but there is extreme excessive clotting that I don’t normally get. My periods are normally medium-heavy, but this level of flow and clotting is very uncommon for me.
My nausea is not strong anymore but I’m still dizzy and having horrible cramping pains.
It was never confirmed that I was pregnant, but I wonder if I’m miscarrying or just having an unfortunate surprise period.

Hi all,
So I am half way through my 4th dose and what felt like a fairly smooth ride has come crashing down..or has it?
The past couple of days I have come down with some sort of cold or virus - sore throat, sore head, blocked nose etc. At the same time I havr completely lost appetite. I feel like I am full to the brim when I eat even though I am barely eating anything. You might have also seen I was complaining of a bit of a sore side a few days ago and worrying it was pancreatitis. Im yawning a ton and having to take huge breaths from my mouth not only because my nose is completely blocked but Im thinking because all of this is causing anxiety. To make matter worsw Ive been on my period.
I dont know what way is up but these past few days have been miserable and I dont know if its mounjaro or I have been unlucky this week. I cant do another week like this and seriously considering coming off it.
I dont know what to do and why I am even writing this. Moral support? Im tired and miserable right now.

I was given a gift card for Xmas and decided to try it, just to use it.
Had a bad experience and I won’t be coming back. Yes. I understand. It is a novelty and I am not saying it cannot be fun. But for golf practice? Really?

• I got a second floor bay and it was horrible. I could not swing properly as my brain was freaking out about that yellow warning strip and the safety net and it stopped me cold of swinging forward and shifting my weight to the left knee. Anybody else had this issue? It felt completely unnatural and put a huge strain on my knees, so far as to be sore after. Of course almost all my swings were at most 70% power and hitting every long club felt horrible and unnatural.
  
• The lack of customization. I can’t move the plastic tee. I can’t move the mat. I really disliked the lenght of the tee.
  
• The deceiving business practices. All over my town they advertise that they have Monday through Wednesday half off. I get there on a Monday and it turns out it is only Tuesday. Shame!
  
• The fact they force you to book for two hours. After a while, and because of the above, it gets boring.
  
• Very overpriced for what they offer.
  

In conclusion, I will take a big bucket at my local municipal any day of the week.

TL;DR: I had a great 1st experience at an Antiochian Orthodox Church - Arabic Tradition. The icons, matins, Divine Liturgy and all was simply fantastic!
********************
Hey Everyone,
I thought I'd write up my first experience at an orthodox church. This may be a bit of a longer post fyi, but I think it's important, and hopefully my experience will help other inquirers.
First off my experience was GREAT! All of the research, YT videos, books and of course this subreddit, had given me plenty of information to prepare me. I will be returning this week, an visiting another church in the Russian Tradition.
So I arrived at the church early as I'm a bit of a time fanatic, and realized that Matins was starting so I stayed for Matins and the Divine Liturgy. I walked in, and oh my gosh, the iconography was breathtaking. Nothing you see online, or in books can compare from my perspective. When it's said that the icons are a window to the heavens/divine, that is a real thing. The church I attended had the dome and in the dome was a icon of our Lord, and it was like He was looking at me. I couldn't stop gazing up at Him, and did so many times during the service. I also saw so many depictions of events, and saints all throughout and it was an emotional and surreal experience. It was incredible!
Matins was interesting as I had no clue what was going on, and this particular Sunday had quite a few guest priests and deacons from out of town and so it was very busy around the alter and the iconostasis . I didn't matter. I sat and listened and took it all in.
I was welcomed by a sub deacon (I think), and he was nice and welcomed me. After, I believe, a deacon, came and welcomed me. He asked me my full name, and where I came from (religious background), I'm Baptist (protestant), and he welcomed me and asked me not to take communion, he also said we could speak later. I told him I had done quite a bit of research and understood. He nodded an thanked me and then scurried back up to the alter as Matins was in process. I sat back down and enjoyed Matins, and then we went right into the Divine Liturgy.
Oh my gosh it was such a sight to behold and feel! While I wouldn't say I "felt like I was home per se", the after affects of the service told me what needed to be done in my life. More on that later. So the divine liturgy was simply amazing! The music, the reading, the homily all of it! I was in that church for 2.5 hours and it flew by!
The service was mostly in English, with a mix of Arabic, and most of the parishioners were arabic. I had not idea the church was of the arabic tradition, but that didn't matter to me. I know and have experienced many cultures so it was fine. As the divine liturgy began, the church filled up! It was nice to see familys, couples, kids, grandparents and the like in the church. And for those who are wondering if they stick out like a sore thumb, I am of African American heritage, and so I was the only one there. No biggie for me, and no one cared. No one was looking at me, even when the archpriest welcomed me during the Divine Liturgy (that was a shock to me as I don't like public attention). There were also some celebrations, as one of the subdeacons was moving away to another state, and there was a recently married couple that received their crowns, which was nice to see.
Finally, I was able to see the sacrament of holy communion, which was a sight to behold. And when I say I saw it, it was not more than a half a foot in front of me due to where I was sitting so I was able to "experience it" without actually partaking.
Overall thoughts:
Simply incredible and I know for a fact that I want to be a part of the original church. Now I need to find which orthodox church/tradition best suits me (currently in process). The after effects of the services were like lightening striking my inner being! I was energized and felt incredible at a spiritual level, so much so that I wanted to go back again the same day! I knew then and their that this is where I belonged.
I also didn't read the Matins/Divine Liturgy before going, which was fine for me. In hindsight, I probably should have so I at least knew what was going on, but for me, it didn't matter for my first experience.
I am ecstatic and looking forward to becoming a Catechumen, and then a full member of the original church!
Thank you all for your posts, responses and the knowledge that is in this sub. It helped me tremendously, and I'm sticking around :)
My our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, bless you all!
-S
The Church: https://stmarylivonia.com/

Did we do it?
Working, raising kids, running a household. I can barely do anything....it's hard. I've got to plan around my body and whatever it's going through that day.
Ladies and Gentlemen...how in the Fu€k did we get do much done?
I used to work full time, run the household and all that entails (my husband had to learn how to clean and cook 🙄 and I love him but he sucks at both, no wonder I'm so skinny). I had a part time gig as well.
I mowed the lawn most of the time. An acre and a half. I have 2 huge raised vegetable gardens...22' X 22' ....and did it by myself I'd like to add.
I did most of the landscaping, hired most of the contractors (married to one and yes he doesn't do it for our home, unfortunately) . Dealt with repair people, snaked stuck drains and toilets myself, as well as changed a faucet.
Clean the upholstery, carpet every year. Cleaned the oven, the appliances, windows, woodwork.
Decluttered everyone's closets, drawers. The dusting, cleaning the floors, the bathrooms (3) . All the laundry. All the shopping. All the cooking with a couple of exceptions.
Took care of each of my grandkids while my daughter worked (and I was doing my second job).
All the birthday's, holiday shopping and decorating. The strong woman in my clan who everyone comes to for help.
I'm exhausted typing this out.
We aren't rich, and we live "close to the vest". I'm a saver. So I "do it myself" like a lot of women. And that includes what is typically "a man's work".
Truth is I was raised more like a boy, and I was my father's right hand "man" lol. I regret nothing. I learned how to tear a motor apart and rebuild it.
I made my own tools, back in the stone age with old toothpaste tubes. Did carpentry. Plumbing. All the painting...I've painted the inside now 4X in 37 years.
People, my family are either spoiled or out of their minds.
Please help me. I know you don't think cleaning is important, but it is. Look at what the house looks like from the last year .....holy hell. It's disgusting. That's what happens when momma has cancer.
You'd think at least they'd be neater and cleaner.
I spent 3 hours scrubbing the master bath ..and you come in and leave toothpaste blobs all over the counter and floor. C'mon. It feels disrespectful, and I'm getting pissed at you people.
Mom is NOT "all better ", mom is STILL in ACTIVE treatment, give me a damn break already.
Sorry. I needed to type it out.
Now I'm going to find help on Angie's list.
I may just say to husband; I'm too sore, weak and unless YOU HELP ME, I'm hiring a cleaning person.

I wanted to track my progress and also maybe provide helpful insight for those looking to get surgery. I'll be updating this every few days.
SYMPTOMS/CONTEXT:
I 28f had a severe herniated disk at the l4/l5 disc since 2021 was working towards treatment in 2022 but lost my insurance at the new year of 2023 and went the entire year without seeing any doctors. In Dec of 2023 i was able to get a new job and back on the original insurance and pick up where i left off. At the time of my most recent MRI in Feb 2024 the herniation was described as severe causing severe stenosis and nerve impingement it measured 19x10x19mm. My symptoms continued to worsen to the point I was unable to do much of anything, sitting, standing, laying down all hurt, I barely slept because I'd be in severe pain from laying down within a few hours. I couldn't drive, I lost weight because I couldn't sit or stand long enough to cook and just laid in bed tossing and turning. I didn't shower, brush my hair, walk my dog, clean my house or go anywhere unless I absolutely had to. I could likely count the number of times I left my house between February and May on both hands. Pain was majority in my left side, hip and gluten, behind my knee and I had numbness in the front of my lower left leg and the top of my left foot. My right leg and foot had existing nerve damage because I have had this issue before from a snowboarding accident. I had existing numbness and weakness in the right leg which worsened to the point I couldn't wiggle my toes and had poor balance. I have saddle area numbness, urinary retention and incontinence and bowel incontinence when my stool is too soft. Again all of which worsened.
THE SURGERY:
I had surgery on May 9th, I was expected to be admitted for 1 day because my surgeon expected he would need to remove bone on the right side not just the left to get all the disc material. He was able to open me up on the left side and get everything out. However, my disc material had pressed my nerve into the bone and wore it very very thing and the dura tore causing a CSF leak. A neurosurgeon assisted in closing up the leak. My surgeon was impressed by the size of the herniation and took pictures to show me at our next post op appointment, saying my entire disc had essentally been blown out into the small space which was what was making my symptoms so bad, there was no room left for my nerve. There were no complications.
RECOVERY
DAY 1-5: I ended up having to lay flat for 48 hours due to the dural tear. After which I was allowed to sit up. The pain was mostly from soreness but I have having nerve pain that pulsed from my back into my glute. It would wake me up out of my drug induced sleep. I also ended up getting my period on the 2nd day which caused a lot of back soreness and cramping. I think a lot of my discomfort was due to being stuck in bed because PT and OT had not seen me and I wasn't able to leave the bed unattended. On day 3 I was able to get up and they removed my foley and the little leg wraps that fill with air to keep up with circulation. I was able to go to the bathroom and move pretty well with my cane around the room. This continued until day 5 where I was able to meet with PT and OT we walked the halls of the hospital and I was permitted to go home. The car ride was extremely uncomfortable. I was able to shower for the first time since the day before surgery using a shower chair and while difficult to not twist etc it was tolerable. The least painful shower ive had in almost 2 years. I found myself extremely sore by the end of day 5.
DAY 6: (05/14) as of this post this is my current day. I still have the throbbing pain but mostly this seems to be stirred up by movement. Mostly going from a laying down to sitting position. Though it does still randomly occur while I am laying down but not nearly as much. I'm about half way through the day and have found that laying on my right side is far more comfortable than my left side. I have tried sitting in a recliner and just leaning back but this seems to put too much pressure on my back and incision site so I have been mostly in bed or laying on my couch which is very firm and easy to get up and down from. I won't have anyone staying with me after today and I'm confident that I'll be able to handle things on my own. Other than the pain relief I have not noticed any improvement to the other symptoms I had, numbness, weakness etc remain the same.

I had been feeling off with tiredness, nausea, and a head and body ache for the last two days but thought I was in the midst of a minor flare up. Last night I went to bed with my throat feeling a little sore, stupid sjogrens, but I woke up when I couldn’t breath or swallow laying down.
Slept in my recliner and powered through it thinking it was still a flare up and went to work feeling like crap. I looked so bad my boss sent me home and a coworker said that my symptoms also sounded like strep throat and that I should get it checked out cuz it’s highly contagious.
WELL, she was right, and I feel like my throat is on fire, hot water is helping some. Currently I am experiencing the worst chills and aches and my throat hurts so bad I can’t sleep even though my body feels like it’s screaming the need for a nap. The pills I have to take are horse sized and it’s agony just trying to swallow them and I have to take 4 of them daily.
I just want to throw a giant big baby for because I have never had Strep Throat before. Luckily my boss was understanding that I needed the next few days off because I work in the kitchen and being contagious is not a good idea around food, at least until the pills kick in

I wanted to track my progress and also maybe provide helpful insight for those looking to get surgery. I'll be updating this every few days.
SYMPTOMS/CONTEXT:
I 28f had a severe herniated disk at the l4/l5 disc since 2021 was working towards treatment in 2022 but lost my insurance at the new year of 2023 and went the entire year without seeing any doctors. In Dec of 2023 i was able to get a new job and back on the original insurance and pick up where i left off. At the time of my most recent MRI in Feb 2024 the herniation was described as severe causing severe stenosis and nerve impingement it measured 19x10x19mm. My symptoms continued to worsen to the point I was unable to do much of anything, sitting, standing, laying down all hurt, I barely slept because I'd be in severe pain from laying down within a few hours. I couldn't drive, I lost weight because I couldn't sit or stand long enough to cook and just laid in bed tossing and turning. I didn't shower, brush my hair, walk my dog, clean my house or go anywhere unless I absolutely had to. I could likely count the number of times I left my house between February and May on both hands. Pain was majority in my left side, hip and gluten, behind my knee and I had numbness in the front of my lower left leg and the top of my left foot. My right leg and foot had existing nerve damage because I have had this issue before from a snowboarding accident. I had existing numbness and weakness in the right leg which worsened to the point I couldn't wiggle my toes and had poor balance. I have saddle area numbness, urinary retention and incontinence and bowel incontinence when my stool is too soft. Again all of which worsened.
THE SURGERY:
I had surgery on May 9th, I was expected to be admitted for 1 day because my surgeon expected he would need to remove bone on the right side not just the left to get all the disc material. He was able to open me up on the left side and get everything out. However, my disc material had pressed my nerve into the bone and wore it very very thing and the dura tore causing a CSF leak. A neurosurgeon assisted in closing up the leak. My surgeon was impressed by the size of the herniation and took pictures to show me at our next post op appointment, saying my entire disc had essentally been blown out into the small space which was what was making my symptoms so bad, there was no room left for my nerve. There were no complications.
RECOVERY
DAY 1-5: I ended up having to lay flat for 48 hours due to the dural tear. After which I was allowed to sit up. The pain was mostly from soreness but I have having nerve pain that pulsed from my back into my glute. It would wake me up out of my drug induced sleep. I also ended up getting my period on the 2nd day which caused a lot of back soreness and cramping. I think a lot of my discomfort was due to being stuck in bed because PT and OT had not seen me and I wasn't able to leave the bed unattended. On day 3 I was able to get up and they removed my foley and the little leg wraps that fill with air to keep up with circulation. I was able to go to the bathroom and move pretty well with my cane around the room. This continued until day 5 where I was able to meet with PT and OT we walked the halls of the hospital and I was permitted to go home. The car ride was extremely uncomfortable. I was able to shower for the first time since the day before surgery using a shower chair and while difficult to not twist etc it was tolerable. The least painful shower ive had in almost 2 years. I found myself extremely sore by the end of day 5.
DAY 6: (05/14) as of this post this is my current day. I still have the throbbing pain but mostly this seems to be stirred up by movement. Mostly going from a laying down to sitting position. Though it does still randomly occur while I am laying down but not nearly as much. I'm about half way through the day and have found that laying on my right side is far more comfortable than my left side. I have tried sitting in a recliner and just leaning back but this seems to put too much pressure on my back and incision site so I have been mostly in bed or laying on my couch which is very firm and easy to get up and down from. I won't have anyone staying with me after today and I'm confident that I'll be able to handle things on my own. Other than the pain relief I have not noticed any improvement to the other symptoms I had, numbness, weakness etc remain the same.

Hello all, getting into cycling, just picked up a specialized cross trail (hybrid bike).
Was lucky enough to pick it up for about $230 and was told by previous owner was gifted to them and never really ridden too much.
Issue I had was when airing up the bicycle tires. Front tire was flat and back tire was low, I had so much hell with the “presta” valve. Took so much time and energy to get air into the tires and they still feel rather squishy.
I’m perplexed on the issue if it’s a valve issue, tire/ tube issue, hand pump issue ($9 Walmart pump) or just the user (been known to not put all the puzzle pieces)
Should airing the tire be extremely difficult? How inflated should the tires be? Should the be flex or should the be rigid?
My first ride I rode for about 7 miles through town over the course of an hour and worked up a pretty good sweat, little sore today but mainly my bum from the saddle. I hopped out of bed this morning and was only able to ride for about 10 minutes or so before I was in too much discomfort.
How long does the “break in” period usually last? And how long does it take to get up to about 12-15 miles without feeling super worn out by the end of it?
Thanks in advance TLDR: I don’t think I’m smarter than a hand pump & my bum hurts after first ride… How long until I can ride the bike and it doesn’t hurt?

Hi everyone,
I started Yasmin 4 months ago after some time on a lower dose pill. I’ve noticed that this month my areolas seem to be bigger? Not necessarily darker (at least not that I’ve noticed), but they seem to take up more… space? Everything I’ve seen says that bigger areolas can be a sign of pregnancy, but I haven’t missed a pill this month and had only protected sex 2 weeks ago. I’m also not experiencing any other symptoms like sore breasts or bigger breasts, nor increased appetite/fatigue/etc. The only other cause of this I could think of would be I’ve started doing more intense cardio recently and therefore might be burning fat - especially in my boobs - that could cause the areolas to appear larger. I am taking my pill continuous this month due to a vacation so I won’t have a withdrawal bleed for ~4 weeks, so I’m just a little worried about what this could be. Has anyone else experienced this side effect on the combo pill?

Hey yall. Ive been diagnosed with psoriasis for a while now, genetic. Ive mostly been having issues with my hands and elbows, however recently i discovered a fun new thing (/s). I've been having a lot of trouble with soreness and pain in my hips (occasionally my back) and shoulders. It's not that intense, but it hurt a lot last week to the point i couldnt even find a comfortable position to sleep. I really don't know if it's related to my psoriasis, since it doesn't look inflamed. (No swelling etc.) Should I be worried/contact my GP?

Hello, I live with my family. I don't think I'm a super angry person, in fact I'm trying to become a calmer person. My family tends to coddle my mom's husband, my step father. It also seems that they always think I'm lying about something. They ask something, I respond, and they say I'm a liar. For example, we have these sinks and you can close the drain with a plunger thing by pulling it up. It fell out a long time ago, and it was just barely in. I accidentally pulled it out, left it out for a day, what not. Well I got interrogated about it, I explain it's been like that (probably could have worded that better) and was called a liar. I don't mean to lie, but I think from now on, I just won't claim to have damaged anything, be it messing up a meal or. Actually, I don't think I can think if another example. I've come to learn that I'm the Fuck Up Guy. I'm the guy you go to when there is a fuck up. Upon realizing this, I grit my teeth so hard that I chipped a good bit off my front tooth. I did "not" get into a fist fight with my step father on Feb. 13th because of how shit he treats everyone including my mom, and I do "not" wish he would just pass away. I'm just so tired of him treating us awfully, I'm tired of everyone saying what I say I wrong until someone else says it, and I'm already tired of being the "Fuck Up Guy". My jaw is also sore, earlier yesterday, I could hear something like grinding.

okay so, before you say anything i know that i’m quite young. i’m (16f) and seeing this guy around my age (18m) i’ve been in a relationship in the past, but only really lasted 2 weeks before he cheated on me and went off with another girl and ended things between us, so i really don’t have that much of a dating experience especially at my age.
this guy that i’m currently seeing i have only met 3 times, including yesterday. the first time we met was lovely, i remember being really nervous to meet him, but we ended up going for a nice walk along some hills and had really good chats and got to know each other some more.
the second time was a few weeks ago. we went to these woods near a park and sat down and talked. we spoke for hours and hours, enjoying each others company and overall having a really good time.
now, i have a lot of friends who are around my age and have lost their V cards and things like that, but i’m not like that. and so when he kissed me in the middle of walking to the bus stop in one of the fields on the way there, i didn’t like it. not because i don’t like him, but because that was the second time i had met him and his tongue was already down my throat and i don’t want him to just to pretend to be acting all sweet and nice just to get into my pants. and you might be thinking, why didn’t you swerve him? i’m quite awkward and bad at rejecting people so i just went along with it and i’m also not a stranger when it comes to kissing, but that doesn’t mean that i did want to kiss him in the first place.
but putting that all aside, when i met him yesterday is where i’m really questioning if i like him or not. when i first saw him he gave me a bouquet of flowers which i thought was sweet of him and he gave me a kiss on the cheek. not so bad right? is what i thought until we found a nice bench to sit on. we were sitting, chatting for a bit and then he put his arm around me. it was nice for a little bit, smooth as well but then he moved from putting his arm around me to full on like hugging me on this bench which i’m not going to lie i thought it was a little bit weird because this was the 3rd time i have ever met this guy and he was being overly affectionate with me. and i love physical touch, it’s one of my love languages. but not with a guy that i barely know. he also kept putting his head on my chest and hugging me like that from the side, a bit awkward and weird to see if you’re someone going for a walk lol.
anyways, this is where i really was wondering if i like him or not when he would compliment me and straight after kiss me. this would of been fine if he kissed me like once or twice in total of that day but when i say he probably kissed me around 30 times i am not joking. and because he kept kissing and such i got really uncomfortable and cut it short and decided to go home early. in total we spent around a hour and a half together.
but anyways another thing that really got me was when he told me to lie down on his lap while we were talking. i didn’t mind that for like a little bit but my neck got sore and i don’t know i just wasn’t really feeling it especially because he kept kissing me on the lips when i was just trying to talk, and on my forehead as well. so that’s when i made us walk to a different bench to get him to stop kissing me for a while and so i wouldn’t have to lie on his lap and just be uncomfortable.
and what kind of shocked me was when we were waiting for my bus, and there was this classroom of kids standing a meter away from us he kept complimenting me, looking at me, trying to make eye contact and basically just trying to kiss me. and it wasn’t going to be like a peck on the lips or a kiss on the forehead it was going to be with tongue because you know when you just look at a guy right before he’s trying to kiss you or something and they make that face? that’s what he was doing.
so overall i think i like this guy but i really don’t like it when he’s being too affectionate with me, trying to kiss me and actually kissing me. he’s still a stranger to me and i’ve only met him 3 times. i want to also communicate with him that i don’t want to be kissing all the time and that i don’t know him enough for any of that but i don’t know how without being mean or losing him. and because i don’t know if i actually like him or not because of all this, i’ve just been keeping his close by talking to him on social media but shutting down any ideas that he has about meeting up, basically leading him on until i realise if i like him or not. and i’ve told my friends about this and some of them are on my side, understanding that i’m not sure if i like him or not ect and others are calling me out for leading him on and saying that i’m being horrible. aita?

hey everyone, i started strattera last week (wednesday) on 18mg and after five days i was instructed to start taking two 18mg pills. i started taking two yesterday and felt pretty funky all day. the regular stuff. nauseous, out of it, sleepy, nothing wild. but by the end of the day my body felt heavy and sore. i woke up this morning feeling sore again, but worse. i haven’t worked out or done anything to make myself sore so i’m not sure why? has anyone had this side effect?

this is a copy paste from another post in another channel but i need as much help as possible. i’m sick. suddenly got hit with runny nose and kept sneezing. also have sore throat. been sick since last saturday (it’s wednesday 12am) my period was expected yesterday but it never came. i’m assuming the sudden cold threw off my cycle. i just want my period to be over with as my period cramps can be extremely painful + i have tests and exams coming next week. so i wouldn’t want it to affect my grades (it happened twice before) how do i make it come faster so i can get it over with ? what are signs i should be looking out for so i know it’d come ? lately my stomach have been very bloated or just felt very tight and uncomfortable at night. it’s normal for me but it’s still super uncomfortable.

So I'm buying now at $39 and if goes lower
If I kill the stock I'm sorry bros
I will get that Onyx Copper in S3🫡 .
But just in case this happens I think the economy has been ready to crash and they're now gonna let it and blame it on US
So we'll probably be lost out to inflation they make after the MOASS with WW3 and such
^ really hope I'm wrong but he ready because we're dealing with cheats and sore losers

i’m sick. suddenly got hit with runny nose and kept sneezing. also have sore throat. been sick since last saturday (it’s wednesday 12am) my period was expected yesterday but it never came. i’m assuming the sudden cold threw off my cycle. i just want my period to be over with as my period cramps can be extremely painful + i have tests and exams coming next week. so i wouldn’t want it to affect my grades (it happened twice before) how do i make it come faster so i can get it over with ? what are signs i should be looking out for so i know it’d come ? lately my stomach have been very bloated or just felt very tight and uncomfortable at night. it’s normal for me but it’s still super uncomfortable.

Hi,
I'm (31M) preparing to see my partner (P, 34NB) for the first time in a year. I'm pretty excited as I have missed them.
Currently they are on a vacation in the capital city of my country (which is considerable distance away) with Meta (M) and some friends, and will be meeting me and staying with me later on. We have had a bit of an argument over P boundary setting with me regarding meeting arrangements and this has made me felt less confident about our date week as a whole.
The situation feels a bit personal for myself because I have GAD, a disability and am neurodivergent with comorbid executive dysfunction issues. I personally think that the ED is a significant stressor for Partner, maybe even more than my mental health! Although I am not sure why this is.
I can somewhat understand why executive functioning is a sore spot and important. In general booking flights, trains, hotels etc. can be really stressful and overwhelming for me, and while a general problem, this is obviously a problem in an LDR especially. There is also P's work schedule to consider. I wish we had more autonomy but I can't and in fact right now I'm not even *allowed* to drive.
So what happened: my polycule suggested this UK meet months ago, and I was keen, but this was at the time just an idea. The plan was always to meet P, M et. al. after their break in capital city A in city B and then for the group to split so that P and I could do our own thing separately.
For various unfortunate reasons though (including awaiting an appointment for surgery and my social security review) I was first unable to commit until 2 weeks ago, when I had a hospital appointment (which was almost a 5 minute waste of time but that's another story) and then procrastinated on reserving hotels. (I was especially scared of being discharged if I rescheduled, and as a disabled person I am just scared of my government who frankly dislike and scapegoat disabled people.) I was also insecure about meeting meta and especially the friends. Finally money was both an issue and something I was pretending was not for reasons I'll explain below.
P tried to help me with hotel reservation but we were unable to complete it before they left their country last weekend. I can't remember why; I'm ashamed to say I might have just got distracted and panicked...
I have since had a busy/exhausting week engaged with advocacy service, family birthdays, therapy and a planned outing with friends--and so has P, with work before leaving and with the trip after. P suggested meeting me halfway at city C, and we could have a day trip there.
I had felt overwhelmed by the decision, so asked for help from my friends. Both my friends and partner kept emphasising that reservations as well as the kinds of long-haul trains I wanted would be 'expensive' and basically talking out of our plan B and plan C. It seems as if my not spending was the major consideration. At risk of sounding both privileged and irresponsible, which maybe I am; from a self-confidence standpoint I care less about spending a lot of money as a) proving to myself I can do these things and b) treating my partner to a nice experience after so long away from each other.
However I am also quite a people pleaser, especially towards P. Additionally deadlines absolutely cause me to panic and any form of timekeeping pressure. So if somebody shares an opinion strongly then I tend to just mirror them. This can often be a problem with Partner who has quite a lot of strong opinions and values, and also can be easily frustrated. They can also be impatient although I want to caveat that in many ways they have been *very* patient with me. It's hard to process. I keep wanting to blame myself or them. The point is that I don't like arguing with people and will let them talk me out of a situation if it means avoiding a fight. (I know this is a trauma response from my abandonment issues and seeing my parents fight while divorcing as a kid)
Partner initially said that since they were now spending time with meta they were unavailable and it was up to me to decide and plan my own arrangements. However they more or less suddenly changed their mind *the next day*, and said that they had to consider their own needs, had ditched any plans with me beyond meeting me at my home (plan D) and will meet me at my home this weekend.
I absolutely understand why P was stressed about pinning down a meet up date, place and time. Despite being completely fluent, they would be travelling in a foreign country after all. Perhaps I had been stubborn about 'wanting to see Meta and friends' while not considering or committing to the logistics of that, which I knew would exhaust me.
The problem was this flip in...willingness to grant me autonomy happened so suddenly I had no time to process it. I was on a bus home at the time. The period between "I think we should drop the holiday" and "I've bought a train directly to yours, meet me" was about 5-10 minutes of streaming IMs where I was in freeze response and unable to really engage.
Although they didn't see it (instead my friend did) I had a complete meltdown and panic attack as in my mind this was failure. I was already doing toxic comparison to Meta (who is wealthier, more relationally experienced, and has greater connections in the poly scene). My hometown is...it's a dump. I mean my local area is nice enough but...it's not a capital city or city break. I sense this is toxic but . Again it feels like personal failure, especially as I had told my family and *even my therapist and social worker* about the plans. So there is embarrassment on top of it, like disappointing P is disappointing *them* by proxy. Further I'm worrying that the fact I think P might even 'need' the entertainment of a big city is being sexist (and so misgendering). Finally I'm struggling to think of alternatives since I doubt they will want to spend the whole time in my apartment.
Nor is this the first time I have had a meltdown due to P being frustrated with how slow, tardy, indecisive I can get. In fact one happened when we went on vacation last year...because I took too long in the toilet before we left for the train. So...yeah, I know how important punctuality and efficiency is to P but I...still got caught off guard this time.
I spoke to my therapist today I'm thinking about whether it'd be good for us to have a one-off 'couples therapy' with my therapist (with P attending) and what I need to ask from my therapist. Fortunately my therapist is poly informed and practises it, which I think will help. However I don't think this is about 'poly' exactly, it seems to be about my own difficulties.
Beyond this I'm not sure what to do. Honestly I don't want to disturb P but also? This incident has caused me to check out of interest in their time with M and friends beforehand, (which I was previously following with interest) and lose some compersion. I have the distressed part of my brain telling me that I can avoid disappointing people if I just let them take control of everything and never say No or speak up. Especially with P it has seemed for a while that the best way to avoid annoying them is to just let them take the lead, because me trying to exercise my own autonomy just causes analysis paralysis and arguments leading to panic attacks/meltdowns/shame spirals...and tbqh that happens with everyone in my life which suggests it's a me problem. Generally I'm just low energy now, I'm tired and didn't sleep well or much.
I am worried I'm going to get dumped, and I am worried that this would be proof that I am not fit for at least poly dating if not dating in general. My mind takes P and M as representative of 'the ideal ENM individual' (read: high agency, extremely independent, values autonomy, effortless boundaries/assertiveness, highly efficient/no EF issues etc.) and I am projecting all of my insecurities and deficit in these faculties onto the whole damn scene.
How much of this boils down to bad communication, RSD and internalised ableism? Idk. I can tell that my mind is on a worry train now, and this whole thing is yet again as much about proving myself as capable to people as being in the moment. I worry that I won't be able to mentally solve this issue and I *have* to let go. Right now I need to clean this place up a little before the weekend. Any help appreciated

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