My ex and I dated long distance for 4 years. When we first got together, we were both coming out of marriages of close to 20 years. Both of us only had a few dates with others before we became monogamous. She was/is really fit for our ages (late 40s at the time) and she bragged to me that one of her dates was with a 28 year old guy. She also joked that I ruined her plans of becoming a cougar since she was in a dead bedroom marriage for a long time. Our relationship was amazing at the beginning.
Early in our relationship she told me a friend/acquaintance (not super close) invited her on a trip to Europe. It was a work trip for this friend/acquaintance (she works for Fortune 100 company) so my GF only had to pay for her airfare and food. I told her that is exciting opportunity but secretly my jealous side didn't like it. She went ahead a got a plane ticket.
A couple weeks later more info trickles out. This friend who is married has a crush on a coworker in Europe and she is going there to visit him. Then it comes out that my GF and her friend were invited to stay at this guys villa along with his friends. I get jealous and told her I didn't like the idea of her staying with strange men but the choice was ultimately hers. I probably used some language that made her feel guilty. She meets with the friend to discuss and it comes out that the married friend has slept with this co worker before. My GF decides not to go on this trip and this friend fades away from my GF's life. Again they weren't close to begin with.
Before our break up I noticed her behavior change and mentioning different guys names. She then dumps me and gave me various reasons for the break up. She even mentioned how "I didn't allow" her to go to Europe from 4 years early. I said I just didn't think the trip was appropriate.
Was I wrong to play a strong hand regarding her going to Europe? I am supposed to trust right?
Do you think she likely regretted getting into a relationship soon after the divorce and not dating around that pushed her to dump me especially since she was probably getting attention from these guys she mentioned.

Hello! I've got some tickets for a show that I purchased, but unfortunately, I can't attend. I've already paid for them and I want to support Ray Lau, so I'm offering them to the first four people who respond. Let me know if your interested and I'll email ya the tickets!

Dear Breaker Upper,
Thank you for so generously releasing me! I was held shackled by the idea that we could have been forever, and I was so imprisoned by the confusion of your actions. Why did you never plan dates? Why was it so hard for you to be exclusive? Why did you almost never call me first? Why were you so obsessed with sending selfies of yourself and never asked questions about me?
I am so glad you're not The One. I am so glad that I don't have to accommodate my dreams of True Love to include long silences, tepid make outs, and understandable inconsideration. I don't have to settle for a guy that has to have sex with me in order to know I'm the one. I don't have to tolerate last minute half-baked plans.
Now I can continue to dream of better without you as I make out and get fingered by hot guys in movie theaters. I can have romantic passionate kisses in the middle of a mosh pit to my favorite bands. I can have a guy that isn't afraid to grab my ass and take a kiss from me randomly because he felt like it. I can have long conversations on the phone where we fall asleep to each other's snores. We can be quiet without it being interpreted with anxiety as lack of chemistry. I can cry and be emotional and not be considered "intense" because life is intense, and don't you think when someone tells you they don't love you that maybe you should feel "intense"? I think my Mr. Right would feel like that is so. Not you though.
I don't have to worry about being endlessly interesting because I already am. I did the self-work. I am amazing and powerful, and I am only getting better. The guy that is right for me isn't afraid of my judgment because of my accomplishments, talents and confidence. He is proud to stand by my side, and we are happy to learn and expand from each other's differences.
Thank you, Breaker Upper. I am so free now. Now I don't have to feel guilty about all these men taking notice and offering me numbers, offering me tickets to their concerts and planning romantic dates for me when you failed to appreciate what was right in front of you and did nothing.
Warm regards,
The One That Got Away

Last summer, my daughter’s boyfriend of 3 years asked permission to marry my daughter. She is 24 years old and just completed graduate school. Boyfriend just finished graduate school and has a steady job.
My husband said no. While we aren’t the biggest fans of the boyfriend, the sole reason for saying no is because we do not feel like our daughter is ready to be married. She doesn’t take care of herself, she refused to find a job for a long time, relying on us or the boyfriend to fully support her during graduate school. She did eventually find a job but worked the bare minimum hours. She is immature and in our opinion not ready to be married. We realize that’s our opinion, she is an adult and can do what she wants, but they asked for permission and we gave an honest answer.
They left our house angry and did not speak to us for several weeks. Finally my daughter expressed her disappointment that we said no, and we explained our reasons. We were fully aware they would probably get engaged anyway and that’s fine. We did suggest they wait a year and give my daughter time to get established after graduating.
They got engaged. And to their credit they did make changes. They took over paying their rent fully. My daughter took out a loan for the remainder of her tuition. My daughter still did not pick up more hours, but the boyfriend put them on a budget and made it work. We recognize their effort.
Shortly after we were notified that they had gotten engaged. We were a little hurt that they went against our advice, but again they are adults and can make their own choices.
At that point the funding we were helping her with was medical bills.
As she has approached graduation, she has done the bare minimum to find a job, settling for a temp position. She expected to stay on our benefits even though her job offered her own. She has told people that we “cut her off financially”.
Last week I received an engagement party invite from my daughter’s friend. My daughter has not mentioned this party at all, including last weekend when we were all together for 3 days. This has done nothing but confirm my decision that she is immature and not ready for marriage.
AITAH for not wanting to attend? The party is 4 hours away in the middle of a Saturday. It would last 2-3 hours at most and then I would have to drive 4 hours home. I already had plans for the weekend it’s scheduled (baseball game tickets) and I feel like if my daughter isn’t mature enough to tell me directly about the party, I shouldn’t attend and give the impression I support her getting married at this time.
I would RSVP no to the hostess and leave it at that.
I am willing and would like to have a discussion with my daughter about this especially considering the next event would be a wedding, but previous attempts have shown she is not receptive to having that discussion at this time. She basically told me we should have said yes regardless of our opinion.
So, AITAH?

Has anyone purchased a ticket from StubHub? Do they still include VIP soundcheck if the seat sold on StubHub is in the VIP package zone on Ticketmaster? How is the ticket delivered? Can I use my Ticketmaster app to enter the concert?
This is my first time participating in this massive ticketing, and I messed everything up, lol.
Thank you so much.

Unfortunately, my daughter has to have a surgery this same day so I’m looking to sell my tickets to the Friday show in Denver. Looking to receive what we paid for presale. Thanks!

My grandparents passed away recently. I followed the guidelines my grandma set up for her final event. Her Church, her burial plot, her casket and the same for my grandpa. I just didn't expect for it to be a joint funeral. I sent out the notifications to friends of theirs and family after the date was set in stone. Their friends all came, so did most of my grandma's church but no family showed up. I wasn't surprised, I hadn't seen most of them in about 4 years.
I had a great time with my grandparents friends and then I went back home and cried my heart out. I had been their sole caregiver and I didn't know what to do without them. I had taken care of them for 15 years. It started with little things like lifting heavy things and escalated to needing to change the bed twice a night sometimes. I was empty and started to scroll through my grandpa's facebook to see pictures he posted before his memory went..
I found a group, started about 3 years ago that was being flooded with activity. When I went poking around I found out it was my mother who was hosting a funeral at her church and was 'trying to get final expenses taken care of.' I was stunned. Here was the woman I hadn't spoken to since throwing her out of the house for stealing jewelry and upsetting grandma terribly by using her Alzheimer's against her. 'How could you forget my birthday! You promised to give me this!'
I went to the funeral my mother had planned and listened to the pastor and then my mother got up to talk. She told everyone how hard it was taking care of them and something inside me roared to life. I don't remember everything I said, but it did include that she didn't pay for anything for them, not their caskets, not their burial plots, not their cremation, nothing. I told everyone I put them to rest at the funeral grandma planned herself 4 days prior. I said she'd never paid for any of their care or even seen them for 4 years.
I was asked to leave and drove home. Later, a cousin asked me if what I said was true and when I said it was and I could provide proof, they explained my mother had been taking funds from the family for years to pay for their care at a facility because they had outlived their insurance policy. They also explained I got a lot of people in trouble because somewhere in the speech I shouted I had done it all alone for years without any help. A lot of family members used my grandparents as an excuse to get out of work and had invited their coworkers to the funeral. By hearing my outburst they were now in trouble for lying as for the reasons to leave work or miss days.
She then went on to ask me about the inheritance and when that would be passed out. I told her that if anyone had earned the inheritance it had already been taken care of. I thought I was in the right, but now I'm doubting myself after so many cousins and family members are calling to tell me I handled it really poorly.
AITA? Did I handle this badly? Everyone's telling me I did.

Context: I am a 21F and my bf is a 27M. I am a psychology major applying for grad school this fall and my bf works full time. We both live with our parents, however I live rent free and get an allowance that I have been saving up while he pays $700 a month. His rent includes his phone, car insurance, laundry cleaned, and lunch a few days a week (2-3 days). His mother started complaining about housework, so I started doing his laundry, cooking his lunch 5 days a week, and he showers at my place so he asked his parents to cut the rent so he could contribute to groceries, they gave him a $100 cut for the month (which is where I see them using him as a profit because that’s some cheap sht). I was originally going to my bf’s place a couple times a week, and his mother has this thing where she jokes about “are you sure you want my son, he’s poor”. My boyfriend says it’s a Brazilian thing so I brush it off. But then she just loses her sht for like a week every couple of months where she calls my bf lazy, poor, fat, a b*tch, etc. He says some nasty things back to her, they don’t talk for a few weeks, and then they’re back to normal again. This drives me crazy since I see a lack of boundaries and unhealthy communication, and I tried to talk to my bf about it but he doesn’t see an issue with it. So, I let it go.
The sht show: Now his mother is screaming at him, I walk out of the house like always since I can’t handle conflict, and 20 minutes later she storms outside and tells me that there is no point to our relationship because I don’t do anything for him or contribute financially to move out. Like I said, I’m in college, I’m taking 18 credit hours a semester, no summers off, studying for the GRE, getting grad applications ready, and looking for a job in my field since I’m tired of working bs jobs. I also have been saving and collecting furniture (I have everything but a living room couch). My bf and I also have an arrangement that he will buy us a house when I go to grad school, he will pay the bills, and when I’m done with school I will help him pay off the principle faster. I stand there silent, taking it, and I walk away down the street. I call my stepdad to pick me up since my bf drove me there. My bf calls me 20 minutes later and says his dad wouldn’t let him out of his room and still wouldn’t let him go. I hung up, called his sister and told her I would be calling the cops if her dad wouldn’t let my bf go. He was released pretty quickly. A couple weeks go by and nobody would talk about it. My bf brought it up, and his parents told him to drop it because “time will fix it”. 2 months after: my bf told them that they can’t interfere in our relationship and he would go no contact if they didn’t stop, however, they claim they did nothing wrong and they did not overstep. Also, they said he can cut contact because they are family and I’m just a gf and I don’t mean sht. Going on 3 months now, my bf’s family is now inviting me to my bf’s birthday party next month which I have gone no contact and have full intention of maintaining, I’m just wondering what to do at this point as I am concerned this will affect holidays and create a bridge between us. My bf says it’s fine and I don’t have to see them, but I don’t want him around his mother is the problem. She talks to him like garbage and has the audacity to tell me what to do in my relationship. I just wish we could go no contact and I am thinking about just demanding he gets an apt (he hates the idea of renting but he can’t buy until we know where I’m going to grad school). I just don’t even know what to do anymore and it’s causing me so much stress and anxiety. Any advice would really be appreciated.

‧˚ʚ🥞ɞ˚‧ introduction ‧˚ʚ🥞ɞ˚‧

scripts. if you're in the shifting community, you know what they are. but if you are new here or a lurker, i will help explain.
a script is a physical copy of your desired reality. it is so that you can materialize the exact and specific reality you want to shift to. it consists of a series of basic information about yourself in said reality. your name, your age, birthday, friends, family, what the reality you are shifting to is like, what you look like, and so on.
scripting itself is merely inserting yourself into a specific reality. the more that you add to your script, the more specific it will be. it is not you making up another reality within your mind and it suddenly spawning into existence. this is a common misconception about it so just clearing up that idea here.

🥯 ݁ ˖˚ FAQs ݁ ˖˚ 🥯

: ̗̀➛ do i need a script?
no you don't. you don't have to script to shift but it is helpful to have one.
: ̗̀➛ do i have to script every little thing?
no, you can script as much as you want or as little as you want. some find it better not to over script and keep it brief while others find it easier to put into as much detail as possible.
: ̗̀➛ can i script _______?
yes. if you ask yourself, whatever it may be, then yes. yes you can. you can script a specific event happening, you can script being on another planet, you can script that you have a sibling, you can script a reality where shifting is common. no matter how absurd it seems to this specific reality, it can be scripted to be possible in another reality. the laws of physics in this reality only hold up in this reality and only this reality.
: ̗̀➛ can i script x future event happening?
yes you can. however, it may only be a future event in the reality that you shift to so be aware of that.
: ̗̀➛ do i need to remember everything that i script?
no, you don't. memorize what you can and briefly skim through your script if it will help, but you don't remember, your subconscious will know and fill in everything else for you. it'll still know where to go.
: ̗̀➛ is it morally wrong to script a partner or someone falling in love with me?
no because you will be shifting to a reality in which you are dating them or they are in love with you. you are not controlling someone to fall in love with you. it would have come naturally before you shifted, you just weren't aware of it before.
to add to this, it's not morally wrong to script other things like something more brought up, race, gender, or age. you already exist in that reality as said race, gender, and age. yes, it is questionable if you say shift to be a specific race for the sole purpose of doing something inappropriate for that.
: ̗̀➛ do i have to start scripting all of my friends?
no. for some, i did, and others i did not. again, you don't even need to script in the first place. it just makes it easier to figure things out more.

‧₊˚ 🤎 templates ‧₊˚ 🤎

i have gathered a few templates depending on your dr. some are broad while others are more specific. the more specific ones are based around popular drs that i have seen around the internet.
: ̗̀➛ fame dr template amino apps
: ̗̀➛ hogwarts dr template hogwarts is here
: ̗̀➛ mha/bnha scripting template amino apps
: ̗̀➛ basic scripting template amino apps
: ̗̀➛ basic scripting template wattpad
: ̗̀➛ kpop scripting template amino apps
: ̗̀➛ basic scripting template w/ suggestions wattpad

🍮꒷۰｡. extra info .｡۰꒷🍮

as i said earlier, you are not making a new reality when you script. that reality already exists. you are just adding all of the exact details of that reality so you can shift easier. scripting is all about going to the reality that you want to go to. if it feels impossible or a struggle to grasp then that's okay. no need to try and understand every single intricate detail about shifting.
you only need to understand the basics. that being that shifting is you shifting your awareness. and also that in order to do that, you need to focus on your desired reality.

☕ ༊·˚ tips ༊·˚ ☕

: ̗̀➛ keep it simple and brief. don't make it fanfiction length. you might as well be writing a fanfiction instead of scripting if you write exactly how you are greeted and what seat you sit down in. it can also be distracting if you can't visualize exactly each thing that you script to a 't.' it can also then become overwhelming for you too.
: ̗̀➛ not scripting something doesn't mean that it won't happen. for example, you don't need to script that you breathe oxygen or have gravity in your reality in order to shift to that reality. it's just a given and your subconscious will be aware of it and shift to that place for you in which it has oxygen or gravity.
: ̗̀➛ do not over stress about the scripting process. it is not as important as the shifting itself. learn to find peace within yourself to shift.
: ̗̀➛ if you don't know what exactly to script, look at templates online or view other people's scripts. you will find a common pattern in what people choose to script. many people script stuff such as not getting hurt, not dying, not being able to snap out of shifting just like that, being able to ground yourself easily when you shift, perfect skin, good grades, better focus, nice and loving family, and more of that sort.
: ̗̀➛ don't treat scripting as a fanfiction. treat it just like reality and you writing down your aspirations. or writing about yourself and your life. like a diary of sorts.

Hi. I have been a fan of exo for long time now (around 8 years) but I lived in country where they never did any concert or activities (probably don't know they have fans there).. and now I have an opportunity to move to south Korea soon and I want to be prepared how to be an active fan instead of just twitter fan ... and since a lot are expecting a world tour after kai and sehun finish military.. I want to be prepared on how to join the fan base there .. I also know about the membership to be periorized in ticketing ... but I don't know how the actually buying tickets works... so if any moved in south Korea and joined the fan base could tell me the process and how to register for fan projects and stuff like this I am also aware that it's exterimely competitive so if any have tips on how to over come this ...
finally, is the process the same during their concerts in manila / tahiland ?

There's a wide concrete area in the back row with markings like seat numbers on the floor, but it's standing room. Did they used to ticket this space and no longer do that? I like to go back there during concerts to dance and spread out a bit so was just wondering about the history.

(19M) and only managed to get 1 ticket, still want to go. Are there any other lone concert goers, or groups, that would take me in as i don't want to be the weird guy stood alone. I am in the standing section :)

Me “F27” and my boyfriend “M25” have been together for 5+ years. I was the hiding girlfriend for 5 years. I have so much resentment towards him what should I do?
My boyfriend and I have been together for 5+ years. We started dating back in 2018. We would talk everyday and barely hangout. I’m talking one every month. It bothered me a lot. We broke up briefly in 2019 (he broke up with me.) He wanted to get back together, and I took him back a month later. He never gifted me anything he would treat me like shit. I was very disposable, barely spent any time with me. The only times we would hangout was for us to hook up and that is it. The whole time he never introduced me to his friends and family. We would have plans he would cancel on last minute so he could hangout with his friends or family. I felt secondary to say the least. It was awful. This all took a hit on my mental health and self esteem. But I stayed only god knows why I stayed. I never got invited to any holiday gatherings with his family. The times I invited to my family gatherings he would never come, he would cancel last minute. The whole time he would like other girls posts and bikini pics on insta. He used to post on twitter insinuating he is single, and misses his ex. He lived out of state for work, I went to see him 3 times that year. The same year my dad got a double lung transplant. He would guilt trip me into coming to visit him, so I would have to save my PTO to use for my trips and not my dad. He never came over whenever my dad was in the hospital for two years. I got a nose surgery that he never came over after. I was never allowed at his house. The only times were to go so we can have sex and he would kick me out after. When he would come home from out of state he would never see me. Because he had barely any time to hang out with his friend and family because I came out to see him in CA more than his friends and family. He moved to another state and I would drive hours and hours to see him. He never drove to see me, if anything he would drive home and not hangout with me. I got a speeding ticket in his city in Illinois and I had to drive out of state to take care of it. He went home to MI the same weekend, and I stayed at his apartment alone. That same year my dad was going through the hardest times and I could barely leave his side. My boyfriend would guilt trip me into saying I’m too busy with my family and don’t put enough effort. This is just a snippet. I try to forgive him and move past it as he is trying to improve but this is all too much. Everything keeps playing in my head over and over and over. It drives me crazy. I have so much resentment for him. I am being called crazy by him, his family and friends. Because of my reactions and because I broke up with him after I met them and got treated like shit. Which is another story for another day. What should I do? I need help. EDIT: I read some of the comments. I went back to him and we are currently together. But I go to bed and wake up thinking about all the things he has done. I love him, just don’t know what to do!!! Don’t know how to be with someone else and cannot see myself just being alone.

Hi, I had a question for who have used their priority code when queuing for standing (concert). I've only ever used priority at academy venues (both normal and priority were let inside in turns).
I understand that priority gives access to the blueroom waiting area and for first 100 people, however do these first 100 people get access into the venue first when doors open?
I've got standing tickets and just wanted people's experience of using priority at O2 Arena, thanks!

Over the last few years I’ve been overdosing on the regular, not gonna say what I use to do it obviously but it’s very accessible. Yesterday I went downtown and bought/stole 300 pills of 25mg each.
The overdoses give me seizures and I’ve been hospitalized on multiple occasions for it but they haven’t figured out that the seizures were drug induced. So I got an epilepsy diagnosis, even though I only get seizures after I take 25+ pills at once so I know it’s not an accurate diagnosis.
I screwed up everything, got kicked out of school because of depression, I stopped going. I attempted getting back because things have been looking up but I got rejected from 3 colleges. I cut all bridges, I don’t have friends, never had a romantic prospect, I’m an immigrant so not even my family.
Today is my dad’s birthday so I bought him something really expensive, and then tomorrow I’m going to a concert with my sister. A few days ago I had a fancy meal with my mom, so so feel like I’ve created enough good memories so I wont feel guilty about the suicide attempt. I’m not scared of it, I’ve overdosed so many times so by now I’m used to it, if I take enough pills I know it’ll do it for sure. 45-50 pills is more than enough.
The only thing I’m scared of is getting found out, the doctors think I have epilepsy so I don’t get drug tested or anything like that but I’m scared shitless they’ll find out. I just want this to end, I’m just so tired

Hi! I'm working on partnerships and sponsorships for concerts. I have achieved a partnership between Miche Fest Chicago and Xcaret, the best aquatic Park on Cancun Mexico. What do yo think is the best form to take advantage from this partnership? We are offering a new ticket category, it includes Miche Fest VIP access and Xcaret access, how do you think we should handle the communication? Here is the official poster.

I am really just wanting to get what happened off my chest. I went to a concert on Sunday night with my boyfriend and had a horrible experience. I pre-gamed a bit and the concert started almost three hours late. I was drinking IPA after IPA until I blacked out right as the show began. I apparently fell and spilled my drink and security had to escort me out. We maybe were there for five songs before we had to leave.
For backstory, I have struggled with alcohol in the past but have been doing good as of lately. I can make up as many excuses as I want like the fact that I ate barely anything that day, was tired from an exhausting week at work, and had a work conference upcoming the next day that I was highly stressed over. However, I really messed up and had to drive out of town to attend my work conference the next day. I was sober when I woke up but visibly was hungover. I had to leave early in the morning and did not remember this happening. I went to my work conference hungover and low energy and I know people noticed.
My conference was two and a half days and I returned Wednesday afternoon from out of town. I did not talk to my boyfriend much while I was gone as I knew he was upset with me and honestly did not want to face my actions again. I drank at the conference too but was able to control it more until the last night. I overdid it again and stayed out until 4 AM and ended up back at my hotel room with a bag of mine lost, one shoe, and lost my jacket as well. I did not black out until like 3 AM so there is little I do not remember. I think I was one of the last ones out as well but I still am scared someone saw me in this state and will not tell me. I went to a breakfast in the morning and no one mentioned anything but I cannot help but feel like sh*t will hit the fan soon.
I came back home and my boyfriend is still upset and making little comments about the ruined concert and how I seem hungover after my conference (I did not get much sleep and drank which is not good). I am upset that he is not being supportive when I am at a mental low but understand how frustrating it was to ruin the concert then immediately go out of town. I lost it and blew up on him earlier because I honestly cannot take any more shame and guilt without having a mental breakdown.
This is such a low moment for me and makes me never want to drink again. If I could go back and sell my tickets before the show I would. I never thought what is usually a fun event would cause me so much stress and turmoil.
I have made it through tough weeks like this before but I am really not in a good place right now. Today was my first day back to work and I am so behind but cannot focus due to brainfog, being tired, not eating right, and all of the hanxiety.

Just needed a place to share what happened yesterday between me and my best friend.
A kind person suggested this sub to share my story and decided to share it here too.
My best friend and I met each other when we were in high school and have been best friends for almost 10 years. She started to ignore my texts starting 1 year ago and when I asked her to go out she always said "I'm busy. No time to go out." I didn't want to lose my friendship with her so I texted her regularly asking how she had been or just sharing about myself.
Yesterday, I just texted her again about something that happened in my life, and replied to me "I don't care" and unfollowed/blocked me from social media that we were connected. I was just confused and shocked as to why she started to act so rude to me and decided to cut me off.
I always celebrate her birthday, give her a present, and go to the parties she invites me to. I always showed how much I love her and how important in my life she is and she always tells me that she cares about me too. I just don't know why she started to hate me and decided to cut me off. I know there is some reason but I cannot even think.
Today, I was able to contact her through IG and asked her why she started to hate me. Her reply was "It's not to be rude but I really don't want to know anything? Like what do you want me to do?? HAHAHA"
I don't know what happened to her in the past year but I was not expecting to receive that type of message from her. I have been feeling down since yesterday but after seeing that message I felt I lost some feelings (as a friend) to her and not wanting to ever see or talk to her anymore.
If you had the same experience as me, please feel free to share your experience!
Thank you for reading my post and have a nice day y'all!

I (29f) have a strained relationship with both my parents (50s m and f) since their divorce. For context the divorce was very messy and they stayed living together for some time before physically seperating due to finances. This caused a lot of discomfort as you can imagine! In order to recieve more money in the separation my mother wanted to take my father to court using us children. My father was not a great parent and was emotionally manipulative as my mother was too. The last time my parents were in the same room was my wedding 4 or so years ago. My mother has had anxiety since the divorce and has said she has had stomach issues (Diarrhea etc) while they were living together. My sons first birthday is coming up. For previous events eg Christmas etc we have had each parent arrive/depart at different times so they avoid eachother. However we had decided when my son was born that we weren't going to do that for events for him as it gave me lots of anxiety as a child (which i dont want my son to have to feel growing older) trying to keep everyone seperate and happy but now i am having second thoughts. My son is only awake for a few hours between his morning and afternoon nap so it would be difficult to divide up the time and i would also have to choose one parent for the cake cutting etc if i split the invitation.

My son died yesterday. He was just a toddler. It was horrible, he died in my hands on my way to the hospital. I haven’t even gotten his body back from the hospital yet.
Me and my ex(both in our 20s), we separated just 3 months after his birth. My ex was a good person and a loving father, but he has severe issues with substance abuse and is prone to becoming violent when he’s high. He started doing drugs a lot, and I’m talking hardcore drugs. He dropped me and my son “in order to keep us safe” and never partook in the kid’s life after this. I know he cared, but he never dared to contact us personally. I get why, but it made me pissed nonetheless.
Just two weeks ago, he texted me about his current life situation, how’s things have gotten dreadful, he has some kind of infection due to drug injections and is deteriorating both mentally and physically. I pity him, I tried to offer help, like a rehab or at least just a meetup. He ghosted me. Blocked my number.
And then happened the terrible accident. My son had a disability, and due to him still being little and curious, he fell down the window when my elderly family member was supposed to watch him. His injuries were untreatable. There was no chance he could survive but we did our best. I’m in shambles. This kid changed me and helped me through so much struggle. He was my hope, my everything, and now he doesn’t exist. His toys, clothes, other stuff is here and untouched but he isn’t. And I don’t even have any spare tears to shed, I’ve been crying nonstop for too long.
Thankfully I’m not alone in this and everyone’s doing their best to get me through this. Everyone, but not my ex. I am afraid the news will destroy him beyond measure, and I don’t want this to happen. Still, I notified every person I could and posted the news on my social media. I was hoping he will read my post or someone else will tell him. I’d like to even invite him to the funeral, perhaps. But I don’t want to say the words myself. WIBTAH if I won’t?
Edit: to make things worse, May 17th is my ex’s birthday, and I totally forgot about it. Our son died May 15th.

Heya! I posted this in /SanJose as well, but you happen to be in or around the South Bay, here are some fun things that are happening around here this week:

Thursday, 5/16

• Off The Grid Night Market Gordon Biersch (357 E. Taylor St., San Jose) 5-9 p.m. FREE Groove to music from San Jose Jazz while you sample over 50+ food trucks and brews at the inaugural event. (Runs through 7/11)
  
• Bay to Breakers Shakeout Sunnyvale Bay Trail (293-327 W. Caribbean Dr., Sunnyvale) 6 p.m. FREE Don your Bay to Breakers gear and run, jog, or walk to your own pace at this running series.
  
• Dwight Clark Legacy Series California Theater (345 S. First St., San Jose) 7 p.m. $30-$287 Along with lively conversations with current and former 9ers players, NBC Sports hosts a presentation of the Dwight Clark Awards.
  
• Drink and Draw Art Boutiki (44 Race St., San Jose) 7 p.m. FREE Bring out your inner artiste while you sip on a tasty beverage and enjoy the sound of Digging Sound Collect. Crayons, paper, pencils, and other utensils provided.
  
• Chris Porter San Jose Improv (62 S. Second St., San Jose) Thu 8 p.m., Fri 7:30 + 9:45 p.m., Sat 7 p.m. + 9:30 p.m. $22-$72 From NBC’s “Last Comic Standing,” and his Netflix special “Ugly and Angry,” this comedian has distinguished himself as a no-frills, no-sound cues, no puppets performer. (Runs through 5/18)
  
• Austin Nasso Rooster T Feathers Comedy Club (Address) Thu-Fri 8 p.m., Sat-Sun 7 p.m. $25 Admission, $35 VIP You may know this former Microsoft software engineer from his recurring appearances on “The Howard Stern Show.” (Runs through 5/19)
  
• Pressure Drop DJ Night Caravan Lounge (98 S. Almaden Ave., San Jose) 9 p.m. FREE Join DJs Norbert + Fuchsia for a night of punk, ska, reggae, soul, and R&B.
  

Friday, 5/17

• Salsa y Cerveza Garden at the Flea (1590 Berryessa Rd., San Jose) 5-9 p.m. FREE Learn to Salsa dance and browse flea market deals while you groove to Union Timbera and gnosh on bites from local food trucks.
  
• Movie Night in the Park: “Puss in Boots: The Last Wish” Meadowfair Park (Corda Dr. + Barberry Ln., San Jose) 6-10 p.m. FREE Bring your blanket + lawn chair, and enjoy lawn games, crafts, and food trucks as you watch one of the coolest, most stylish animated films from last year.
  
• SJBP - Bikers of the Caribbean Ride! Berryessa BART Station (958 Berryessa Station Way, San Jose) 7:30 p.m. FREE Dress like a pirate, or wear your street gear to join other bike enthusiasts for a 15-20 mile ride through North San Jose.
  
• Bay FC vs San Diego Wave FC PayPal Park (1123 Coleman Ave., San Jose) 7:30 p.m. $20-$196 After losses on the road to Chicago and Portland, our team returns home for a “Bay Area Unite” game.
  
• Sofia Niño de Rivera California Theater (345 S. First St., San Jose) 8 p.m. $49-$109 You may know this comedian as Mexico City’s “Woman of the Year” 2016, or from the Netflix dramedy “Club de Cuervos.”
  
• Dark Satellite + Orbit 17 + Dear Banshee Art Boutiki (44 Race St., San Jose) 8 p.m. $15 Advance, $20 Day of Show Bay Area indie rockers collide at a stellar showcase of prog, jazz, and otherworldly riffage.
  
• Alicia Villarreal San Jose Civic (135 W. San Carlos St., San Jose) 8 p.m. $39.50-$149 See the two-time Latin Grammy Award-winning singer for her “Donde Todo Comenzo” tour.
  
• Electric Feels: Indie Rock + Indie Dance Party The Ritz (400 S. First St., San Jose) 9 p.m. $15-$20 Advance, $25 Day of Show From MGMT to Vampire Weekend, alt-J to Hot Chip, dance along to your favorite indie tracks from yesteryear.
  
• Panacea + HRIF + Perarez Caravan Lounge (98 S. Almaden Ave., San Jose) 9 p.m. FREE Chunky riffs, ear-splitting growls, and dense-packed crowds fill one of the most intimate venues in the South Bay.
  

Saturday, 5/18

• Bored Teachers Comedy Tour California Theater (345 S. First St., San Jose) 3 p.m. and 7 p.m. $35-$55 Ring in the end of the school year with the No. 1 teacher comedians in the world performing skits and stand ups.
  
• Culture Night Market Discovery Meadow (180 Woz Way, San Jose) 4-10 p.m. FREE Featuring local vendors, food trucks, and businesses, to hoppin’ stage performances from Universal Grammar, Los Jefes, L James, Thatfool Al, Sutro, DJ Say, and Real Ignorant.
  
• All Out for Al-Nakba San Jose Peace and Justice Center (48 S. Seventh St., San Jose) 4 p.m. FREE Join community members and activists for a screening and discussion of Al Jazeera’s “Al-Nakba: The Palestinian Catastrophe 1948” documentary series as a part of Anti-War Action Network’s national week of action.
  
• Hey Girl! Sexy Slumber Party Splash Video Dance Bar (65 Post St., San Jose) 6 p.m. FREE before 7:30, $10 after Dress in your best pajamas or sexy sleepwear and dance along with fellow fems, femmes, and femme fatales to the tunes of local DJ Rogue Mermaid.
  
• Nate Jackson San Jose Civic (135 W. San Carlos St., San Jose) 7 p.m. $39.50-$200 You know he has to be funny, because his tour’s called the “Super Funny World Tour.” It’s just science.
  
• The ABBA Concert Experience Montgomery Theater (271 S. Market St., San Jose) 7:30 p.m. $39-$59 This family-friendly singalong show highlights the enduring success of one of the world’s most beloved pop supergroups.
  
• San Jose Earthquakes vs. Orlando City SC PayPal Park (1123 Coleman Ave., San Jose) 7:30 p.m. $22-$185 Join the Quakes for Vietnamese Heritage night, with special merch for sale, and limited items with purchase of a ticket.
  
• Take on Me: The Ultimate 80’s Party The Ritz (400 S. First St., San Jose) 8 p.m. $17-$20 Advance, $20 Day of Show Don your favorite hot pants and pastel colors for this celebration of synths and gated reverb drums.
  
• Nineteen Jazz Orchestra Art Boutiki (44 Race St., San Jose) 8 p.m. $25 Advance, $30 Day of Show Along with classic soul, jazz, and R&B, this local professional jazz group will be performing “Obama Suite,” composed by their their former trumpet player, the late Eric Bolvin.
  
• Nature of the Beast SJZ Break Room (310 S. First St., San Jose) 8 p.m. $25 Bay Area jazz legends return to the SJZ stage to perform select songs from Herbie Hancock’s discography.
  
• Dead River Rebels + American Standard + Akira XX Caravan Lounge (98 S. Almaden Ave., San Jose) 9 p.m. FREE DIY punk meets stoner rock at this showcase of local talent.
  

Sunday, 5/19

• Boogie Music Fest Downtown Campbell 10 a.m.-6 p.m. Saturday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Sunday FREE Admission Enjoy food, beer, and wine, plus artisan booths, a kids zone, and a funky “Best Dressed” contest, with live music on two stages both days.
  
• AAPI Pride Brunch Holiday Inn San Jose - Silicon Valley (1350 N. First St., San Jose) 11 a.m.-3 p.m. FREE Celebrate Asian American Pacific Islander History Month with local drag performers, poetry, Mahjong, and trivia games.
  
• Halfway to Halloween Rumble City Boxing (866 Park Ave., San Jose) 2-6 p.m. FREE From spooky wares to Halfoween artistry, check out local artist booths with live music and food.
  
• Homayoun Shajarian + Anoushiravan Rohani San Jose Civic (135 W. San Carlos St., San Jose) 5 p.m. and 9 p.m. Two legendary performers, one from Tehran and the other from Iran, blend Eastern and Western musical traditions.
  
• Jakob’s Castle + The Happys The Ritz (400 S. First St., San Jose) 7 p.m. $15 Advance, $20 Day of Show SoCal rock and ska royalty Jacob Nowell brings his sublime punk sensibilities to the stage.
  
• Sammy Obeid San Jose Improv (62 S. Second St., San Jose) 8:30 p.m. $30-$90 One of my favorite comedians of all time, Sammy’s been a part of the Bay Area comedy scene for the past two decades. Check out some of his bits on Instagram/TikTok!
  

Thanks so much for reading!

You can get this entire post emailed to you each week in my newsletter.
If you have other stuff you’d like people to know about, drop ‘em in the comments! 🙂

• Gregg

Am I being played by this German man?
I (26F American) recently met this German man (28) and I need to know if I’m being played or if he’s nice. I don’t know German dating culture, so I’m hoping I’m not falling for a flirty man that doesn’t actually like me.
I met him about a month ago while we’re both traveling South America and we’ve been on many dates. But he says things that are a little too sweet, which is why I’m suspicious.

1. He got my number because we were in the same WhatsApp group. When saving my contact, he asked which color heart he should put by my name.
2. We went to a restaurant where they give crayons to draw on the paper that covers the table. He said “let’s write our names….do you know how to draw a heart?”
3. He’s been talking about making plans to meet up in the future. Each time I tell him my travel plans, he says, “I could meet you there [Asia, Germany, the US].” I have plans to see him this summer after him telling me to visit like 10 times.
4. He invited me to take a weekend trip with him. I didn’t think he was serious and I didn’t think it would happen. But he was like “let’s book the tickets now” and then we did, it was lovely. Easy to travel with.
5. He always asks if I like certain things about him or his clothes. Asking if I like his beard, his eyes, the color of a shirt he’s wearing, his legs lol, etc. He showed me a bunch of tattoo designs and he’s getting the one I said I like.

All of this and he doesn’t say that he likes me and the only compliment I’ve received is that I’m smart and he likes the way I tell stories. Additionally, he takes hours to text back. He never makes the first move either; I had to kiss him and I had to hold his hand (Okay not fully true, I THINK he tried to kiss me the first date but I pulled away. He didn’t try anything after that).
We all know these traveling romances don’t normally form a relationship. I’ve been taking it slow because I thought I would never see him again. I’m a relationship girl and I don’t want to start something that he’s not serious about. I was dumped by my ex last year so now I’m extra cautious. I’m not dating someone unless I think I could potentially marry them or spend significant time together.
Is this flirting just casual German dating culture or does he like me?