First: https://www.reddit.com/HFY/comments/14vo5lb/troublemakers_deaths_pity/
*previous:* https://www.reddit.com/HFY/comments/1d3yvie/troublemakers_parabellum/
......
Go'mon stormed through the castle corridors. He'd sensed something slip beside him during his encounter with the vampire lord. It wasn't just that damned top hat with the thief's prints. No, it was more subtle than that, it was the sound of a gossamer chain rattling against cloth. He scanned every square inch of the hallways as he walked, slowly twirling the Warhammer in his off-hand as he calmly held the pistol muzzle-up towards the ceiling. He'd barely gotten a glimpse of what almost looked like mist as he stomped through the grand halls with paranoia-fueled, seething anger. Abruptly turning a corner he fired the revolver at what he thought was that pesky invisible parasite.
The shimmer shuddered and he switched to the visible spectrum to find out it was just a tapestry in front of a heating vent.
Go'mon let out an enraged scream, tearing the tapestry apart with his bare hands after casting his weapons aside in a fit of rage and impotence. The visage of Monarch D'vinn looking out from the top of a bombed-out hill in battered armor at the shattered remains of the once human-occupied city, being shredded like single-ply latrine paper by go'mon's molecularly edged cybernetic claws. Having spent his rage on the tapestry, he panted dramatically as his heart pounded in its cask. Turning around he let out another furious scream, howling madly as he scanned the hall with thermals. His Hammer and revolver had disappeared without a trace.
The sudden blare of a Klaxon made him pause as he adjusted his armor, forcing himself to calm down as he examined his molecularly edged claws. The main enemy was at the gates, he should go meet them.
...
Cassius' Heart pounded as he took shallow breaths, Go'mon's backplate inches from his own chest as he held onto the Hammer and Pistol for dear life. As the general strutted outside, Cassius moved in perfect synchronization, his left leg rising with the general's before being placed down in sync. He'd been practicing for weeks with the security droids at the mansion, practicing to keep inches from their backs without touching their metal carapace. Now he strutted behind perhaps the second most powerful being he knew like a silent specter. As Go'mon slammed through a door, breaking it into splinters, Cassius lifted his right leg and rotated out of the way just as Go'mon's tail would've brushed against his Calf, giving him away. As the General strutted out into the middle of the courtyard, Cassius used the various straps attached to his gambeson to affix the weapons to his waist before grabbing his Kama and weighted chain from a small pouch at his belt.
Cassius tossed the weighted end of the chain over the wall of the castle after a short run-up, wrapping the gossamer chain around his hands with each rapid step he took up the wall. Reaching the top, he unhooked the weight from the small bar he'd tossed it around quickly disentangling his hands from the chain. He groped the air on the outside of the wall until he touched the enchanted ladder the Top-Hats had left him. Sliding down the ladder, he spotted Drake sitting astride Barney in the middle of the street. The rest were nowhere to be seen but that indeed was part of the plan. Sprinting over, Cassius leaped onto Barney behind Drake and slipped Go'mon's revolver into the empty holster at his belt. Drawing out no reaction save for a few words from Drake, who didn't turn his head lest he give the gambit away.
"Good work Cassius, Fall back and get a gas mask on. We still don't know what's in those canisters because they inked out the labels."
Cassius slipped off of Barney's back and slipped into a nearby building before De-cloaking as he pressed himself against the wall next to a Warmonger who passed him a spare gas mask. He pulled it on and checked the seal before sitting against the wall as his legs jellied beneath him. His mouth was dryer than the scrubland as he accepted a Volunteer's canteen, drinking heavily through a port in the mask as he rode out the adrenaline crash. He glanced over to where their fighters had pried open a sewer access hatch and were dropping in, the smell of sewage souring the air. A few warmongers closest to the opening had comically attached wooden clothesline clips to their noses.
...
Caz lay atop the second-tallest building in Golgatha, trash and debris piled up around her for camouflage ash she drew a bead on the strutting Go'mon. Her god-given eyes were able to see the purple miasma that rose from him like mercury vapors. She didn't even turn her head as she softly asked.
"Distance?"
The man with Heavy cybernetic augmentations pulled casually from a large pouch of grain alcohol, camera-lense eyes extending from his face as he chewed on a bullet thoughtfully. Slowly he stated.
"One thousand five hundred and sixty-seven meters, If you're keeping it under auto-ignition velocity, you should be able to hold it one mil above and..."
The sound of the bullet in his mouth getting chewed filled the air before he stated.
"Two mils right, wind fluctuates between us and the target, expect a half minute of angle deviation."
Caz adjusted her optic, bringing the point of aim directly onto her crosshairs. The man next to her had called himself "an Olympian" an old sect of bionically enhanced warriors from even before the betrayal wars. In the small amount of time she'd gotten to know the man, she'd found him palatable at the very least, soft-spoken with a touch of crazy, it was refreshing. She tried to ignore the artillery-sized rifle he laid behind, the barrel itself bigger around than a drainage pipe, a suppressor of equally massive size almost protruding over the edge of the building. She watched from the corner of his eye as he pulled the breech open to the side and selected a shell thicker and longer than her forearm with a fused tip. He rammed it into the gun with the same ease she loaded her flechettes with.
They both had different jobs despite sitting on the same roof. She'd take care of anything on two legs, and he'd handle anything that had an armored skin. From her vantage point, she watched as the Agri-bots moved into position, planting their artillery pieces against the ground in preparation to fire. They weren't using High explosives much to Remin and Destrier's chagrin, but with their attack plan, they couldn't risk collapsing the sewers. They were instead armed with a chemical weapon known as "CS Smoke" which would obscure visual sightlines for anyone with unaugmented vision. Lucky for her and the Olympian, that wouldn't be an issue with her clear-sight and his advanced optics. She slowly swiveled her focus onto Drake, keeping the center of the crosshair off him as she watched him.
Sitting astride Barney, Drake looked every bit the warrior he was. His dark helmet and armor were almost lost in the dark night. But the red shock of his Helm's mohawk could not be mistaken, glowing brightly against the darkness. As his palm came to rest on the pommel of his sword, she saw something entirely different for a moment.
A warrior in battered, rusty armor, the flesh falling from his bones as a pair of white lights gleamed behind the helmet. A skeletal hand held a rusty sword in its sheath, Its pale, emaciated steed's head hanging low, milky eyes soulless and empty.
But as soon as she saw it, the image faded and she swiveled her crosshairs onto the castle's inner courtyard. A small, dim red light blinked on the side of the Olympian's skull as the Geknosians organized into fighting lines. Hulking Geknosians in overbuilt power armor manned emplaced turrets and the looming Gas generators. A small feed from the Olympian's perspective overlaid itself on her scope before minimizing to one corner. She watched as his crosshair fell onto one of the two Gallicks. The horseshoe-shaped APCs presenting their bulk to the gate as a bulwark. Caz switched her aim to a heavily armored Geknosian, slowly dialing the small wheel on the forend of her rifle to half-power, just under auto-ignition velocity. The geknosian seemed to get uncomfortable as her crosshairs landed on his chest, fidgeting at the controls of their AA plasma Beam-cannon.
The moment the Agri-bots fired their artillery, she'd remove him from the gene pool and take that AA gun out of the fight so Destrier could get into position.
...
Destrier and Remin ran last-minute checks on the small fleet of two-wheeled land vehicles the Top Hats had called "Dirt bikes." The variable electric powerplant produced little to no noise, even now, powered on and ready to roll they didn't even humm. Stepping back, Destrier let the forearms of his power armor clamshell close as he retook the hand controls. Contrary to popular belief, the hands of power armor weren't at all like gloves. A handle with a pressure sensor for each finger was clasped in his hands, allowing him to manipulate the hands of the armor like his own. Destrier turned his head, helmet whirring on its bearing as he watched Remin mount one of the Dirtbikes, the black scimitar strapped to the suspension of the bike within arm's reach. The old man's Mongolian lamellar draped over either side of the bike like fabric, small metal plates clinking and clattering softly as he pulled his fabric-wrapped helmet back on. Destrier clomped over, hardly noticing the backpack with over two hundred rounds of 13x110 mm HEP.
Remin looked up with a grin and met Destrier's arm halfway in a forearm-gripping handshake, their metal hands clanking together as they slid their arms back into a grip around the base of each other's thumbs, then to a normal handshake before waggling their fingers at each other.
Destrier chuckled softly and looked up at the sky, night vision lenses making it appear stuffed to bursting with stars.
"What's on the black samurai's mind?"
Remin asked softly, head tilted back to also look at the stars between the rooftops.
"Well... I'm looking forward to the fighting to finally being over... Maybe I'll finally be able to settle down and invent something with Martha..."
Remin chuckled softly.
"A noble goal... I'd expect nothing less from you Destri... I'm actually hoping to catch a ride back to human-controlled space. I'm too old for this shit, I want to settle down and live out the last years of my life in peace..."
Destrier nodded in agreement, slowly turning his gaze back to the helicopter, blades slowly turning in preparation for takeoff.
"How old are you Remin? I don't think I ever asked."
The old man paused, thinking for a long time.
"Oh... I'd say I've made it past a century at this point. Got a cybernetic heart when I was a kid thanks to a car accident, Ol' things been keeping me going far past when I shoulda dropped."
Destrier nods and laughs softly.
"Damn, and I thought you were only in your fifties."
Remin laughed in agreeance, setting his hands on the handlebars.
"I don't blame ya, I feel like it. Especially now that my legs aren't filled with creaky arthritis."
Destrier sighed softly, gently punching the old man's shoulder as softly as he could in his power armor.
"See you on the other side old man... whether that be the living side or the dead one."
"Here's to hoping it's the former not the latter."
Destrier chuckled his agreement and boarded the helicopter, making the landing gear compress slightly as he put his weight on the flight deck. Unhooking the feed chain from the side of the backpack, he clipped it into the Ma-deuce's feed chute. It whirred as the heavy cartridges were funneled down the chain and into the gun with a click and a clatter.
...
Barney shifted from one leg to the other beneath Drake, Death's chosen reaching down and gently patting his neck fondly as he softly whispered.
"Just a moment longer boy... There's someone I need to talk to."
Drake closed his eyes, letting the Darkness envelop him for a moment before opening them again.
He looked at Death, who was casually swirling a glass of black bourbon thoughtfully.
"You said you wanted to talk to me right before the battle?"
Death nodded and slid the glass of black bourbon his way.
"I did, I want you to drink this before you go into battle."
Drake picked up the glass, inspecting the pitch-black, inky liquid curiously. Before sniffing it and coughing as his eyes water.
"No offense, But I think something died in your liquor bottle."
Death laughed jovially, pouring his own glass from a red crystal decanter.
"That's because this is made from the blood of my predecessor. I thought i might as well get it out of the way."
Drake suspiciously looked at the glass.
"Okay, what happens when I drink it?"
Death paused, slowly swirling his own glass of black bourbon pensively. Then, he slowly knocked his own back, eyes dilating wide before returning to normal.
"Well, It should allow you to control your power, bypassing the decades of training most need."
Drake gave Death a side eye, sniffing the foul drink one more time asking.
"What's the catch?"
Death frowned, then set his glass down.
"Considering that it's going to completely restructure your magical and circulatory pathways. It's going to hurt like nothing you've ever felt before. It also may or may not bind your guardians to your soul."
Drake's head snapped up.
"Guardians... you mean my parents?"
Death nodded softly.
"Guardians, souls that loved someone so much that they remained on after death to watch over them. Your parents loved you... loved you enough to stand by your side even in death... and before you give me some bullshit about this not being what your parents would want... Remember, they'll always be at your side until you die one way or another."
Drake slowly swirled the bourbon before nodding softly, bringing it to his lips, he downed it in a single gulp. It burned on its way down, the tingling feeling intensely spreading throughout his body and to his fingertips in a moment. His nerves burned, and his very being felt as though it was being scalded by burning hot water. But as he set the glass down on Death's desk, he smiled softly. There was a warmth to the pain, like a cold rag against a feverish forehead. The sting of a garlic poultice applied to a fresh whip-wound. It was the crack of his father's wooden sword against his knuckles during their sparring, the sweat that would drip into his eyes on long evenings working the fields. Drake opened his eyes slowly, no longer sitting in Death's office, but his own soulscape, looking at the long-neglected buildings halfway through construction. But he wasn't alone.
Drake smiled at his mother and father. His mother gave him a soft smile as she touched the scar across his face, the wound in his cheek where a gauss slug had torn it open, then, she took his hand to gently touch the scarred wound where Garravan's knife had pierced his hand. His father just sat cross-legged, drinking a stout mug of scrub tree tea with a proud smile on his face. drake looked between them before holding out his hands.
As his parents took them, they dissolved into motes of light that drifted into his chest. His veins burned, and his eyes and nose bled. His entire existence felt like a blistering inferno as the ground of his soulscape rumbled, small, red flowers the color of blood and the shape of gunshot wounds popping up from the ground. But even as the pain grew, and grew, and grew, He found himself simply laughing, grabbing what felt like an invisible pair of chains and pulling up on them as he stood.
The ground erupted in the middle of his soulscape, a massive, gnarled oak tree sprouting from the ground. Its sturdy trunk protecting a small patch of pink carnations interspersed with curly-petaled white Gardenias. Drake felt something form atop his head and reached up, feeling a thorny crown, he gently pulled it off, looking at the black-petaled roses fondly before returning it to his head. The thorny veins grew down from the crown, snaking their way deep into his flesh only to bloom into what felt like new muscles and tendons that weren't attached to his physical strength. Looking at his upturned palms, he curled his fingers, a steady, smokeless pale flame popping into existence in his palm with next to no effort.
As the pain subsided, Drake closed his eyes, relishing its departure before opening them to the shocked and concerned face of Death. Drake gave him a curious look and Death coughed softly as he composed himself before speaking.
"Look, I know I can hide pain well... But that smile you get when you're hurting is capital C Creepy."
Drake touched his grinning face with a soft laugh, wiping a trickle of blood from his nose.
"Well, guess I can add that to my achievements list, Creeping Death out with a smile."
They both chuckled softly at the joke before Death sighed softly.
"You should get back to them, they're almost ready."
Drake nodded and stood, stepping over to the door.
"Wish me luck."
"Good luck, my Champion. Give them hell."
Drake smiled softly and stepped out the door. When he opened his eyes, he was back in the real world, staring up at Go'mon who'd perched himself atop the castle wall, eyeing Drake hungrily.
Giving Go'mon his signature grin, He reached up and depressed a countersunk button on the side of his helmet.
"Hit 'em"
Drake stated, the sound of artillery rocking the city as Go'mon's hungry look quickly turned to rage. There was a loud, screeching whistle as the artillery shells streaked in, blanketing the area in stinging fog. Drake drew his sword, extending thorned vines of power into it as the blade ignited with pale flames. Barney snuffled excitedly and roared as Drake nudged him forward, the Dinosaur leaping over the wall in a single bound. The final battle for Golgatha had begun, after this, they would either be free...
Or they will have died free.
......
Part 112: will be linked here upon completion.

Imma try to make this a daily contribution to my new self expressing positive habit id like to form over a meth addiction. My HH & LL
My HH Today; It was actually in the same moment that my LL was a thing too
Saw my brother for the first time in a few weeks and he was mad at me so I went and asked why. He was standing leaning in his tent and looked pissed off but I didn't care. Thats my baby brother. He isnt allowed to not love me when I need him to.
He told me why. And I did owe him and my mother an apology.
I just drop every wall ive built up my entire life and said, " I know... I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to be so mean"
He walked over me to me and said, "thanks for watering my blueberry bush". And wrapped his arms around my entire head and pulled me in that embrace ive grown with his whole life.
For 5 seconds I completely let go of every guarded shielded damaged pain ive ever held onto. Including the newest blow I just got to the gut.
The only person in the world that has ever made me feel so many things. My rock. My best friend. My PIC.
My hero. My bubba. My baby brother.
He did exactly what my soul needed today. And I wish so badly that he could be sharing my progress and success in life right now.
Crying about something more painful than I can handle and making up with your best friend you tell everything to all in the same moment. Knowing that as much as j miss them. And my babies. Knowing I dont do well once comfortable. Knowing I'm making the move to what some call a better life.... Knowing I have to walk away from what once was. And what now is... And start preparing for changes and the actions to change are things I'm not prepared to change. I will be. One day at a time.

In Super Paper Mario, we see that arguably the most prominent requirement to summon the Chaos Heart is the marriage of Bowser and Peach. Tippi makes this clear by quoting the following passage from the Light Prognosticus:

"A fair and lovely princess... A furious monster king... The union of these two will call forth the Chaos Heart, the consumer of worlds... And the Chaos Heart will ravage the sky, and so bring forth The Void."

Ever since Super Mario Odyssey, I (and I think many others) have been wondering if the wedding in that game would also cause the Chaos Heart to be summoned. By extension, the question of whether Peach and Bowser marrying is the only requirement to summon the Chaos Heart is raised, and, if not, what additional conditions might be required.

Determining Whether the Marriage of Peach and Bowser Is the Only Requirement to Summon the Chaos Heart

Over the course of the franchise, we have often times seen Bowser trying to marry Peach, though most of these examples are non-canon (Super Mario Bros.: Peach-hime Kyūshutsu Dai Sakusen!, Do You Princess Toadstool Take this Koopa...?, The Super Mario Bros. Movie). Though Super Paper Mario is notably the only instance of the ceremony not being stopped and the words "I do" being said by both parties, at which point the Chaos Heart is summoned. This makes it impossible to tell whether the Chaos Heart would be summoned in any other instance of Peach and Bowser marrying. Even before Peach saying I do in SPM, there is no indicator of Chaos Magic perceptible to the player – be it visual, auditive or otherwise.
So we lack concrete premises to infer the requirements to summon the Chaos Heart through deductive reasoning. Let's then take an abductive approach: Bowser attempts marrying Peach at least once after the events of Super Paper Mario. If him marrying Peach was the sole requirement for the Chaos Heart to be summoned, then why would Bowser attempt a marriage (any possible stubbornness or lack of forethought on Bowser's part aside)? From this it could be concluded that Bowser would have some reason to believe that his marriage attempts would not cause the Chaos Heart to be summoned. Such a reason being that there are more requirements to meet to do so.

Additional Requirements to Summon the Chaos Heart

After the closing battle with Count Bleck, he tells the Heroes of Light that dispatching him would make the Chaos Heart disappear and that he thought the Chaos Heart would disappear if the person controlling it fell. Dimentio mentions the Dark Prognosticus saying that Luigi is the perfect host for the Chaos Heart. Merlon quotes the Light Prognosticus, saying the following:

"Naught can stop [The Void]... unless the one protected by the dark power is destroyed."

All of these statements show that the Chaos Heart requires a person to actively control it. It is also shown that a host for the Chaos Heart can be more or less suitable, and that control over it can be relinquished to or seized by a different person.
The chart detailing Wish and Chaos Magic shows how hypothetical Chaos Magic is created by people and used to power (and thus summon) the Chaos Heart. It appears that Chaos Magic is inherently linked to clashing ideas (and by extension the concept of irony), disharmony and conflict, which presents itself in the following cases:

• The disharmony of a union between Peach and Bowser.
• The clashing ideas of Count Bleck, who was forced to give up his own love and then forces the exact opposite on two other people.
• The inner conflicts of Luigi, who wants to to step out his brother's shadow while simultaneously being scared of doing so and also wanting to help out Mario.
• The conflicts of Dimentio, who seemingly needs to rely on Count Black to summon the Chaos Heart clashing with his desire to exert control.

It's reasonable to assume that Peach and Bowser marrying generates a certain amount of Chaos Magic, as the event summons the Chaos Heart. However, the amount could be amplified by the irony of Count Bleck being the one conducting the event. Therefore, it's not conclusive whether the marriage of Peach and Bowser would generate enough Chaos Magic by itself.
We can also assume that the Chaos Heart's host must wield Chaos Magic in order to power and control the Chaos Heart, therefore making them more or less suitable depending on their ability to do so.
In conclusion, in order to summon the Chaos Heart, the following requirements must be met:

1. Enough Chaos Magic must be generated
2. A person must actively control the Chaos Heart
3. The person controlling the Chaos Heart must be able to effectively wield Chaos Magic

(29) and my vagina is so physically hot sometimes I can’t sleep with anything on down there. Currently have an ICE PACK wrapped in paper towel snug between my labia and it feels like heaven! Idk how long Ive had it between now, but it is such incredible relief!
Wtf does this keep happening? Why does it keep overheating? It is usually when i am trying to sleep, get aroused, or when i get friction w clothes. This very rarely happened before but now it is practically every day and every night! Has this happened to anyone else? Im still a virgin so it cant be an STD😭 hormonal issues might make sense since im trans but no longer on any hormones. Idk!!!! Fellow hooha havers, help 🥹

I was chatting with my stepmother a couple of days ago, and the conversation rolled around to family secrets, like how some of my aunts were very cold to me growing up, because my mom had cheated on my dad with his best friend, and served him divorce papers while he was in the hospital after breaking his neck in a car accident. (There's a whole backstory, and I think he was drunk, but I had already known part of this.) My mom said the only way they would get back together was if they could have another child, so I was adopted shortly after. Again, there's a lot more to this, but that's the main topic that started the topic of secrets. Note: both of my parents have passed away.
We started talking about my brother, briefly, because I know that they hate each other. She mentioned something about the fact he's been sleeping with a married woman for decades, and that one of her kids is actually his. Okay, I knew about the affair, he told me himself. Then she said that she thinks he is still getting information about the family, probably from a particular cousin. When we were teens, she, I, and another cousin were incredibly close and did everything together. We also used a lot of substances. I've been clean for 20 years now, she struggles, but has turned her life around for the most part, getting her kids back, and settling down. Our other cousin lost her fight with addiction and died about 16 years ago. My brother is 14 years older than me. He wasn't ever really involved with our shenanigans, although I know he is also an alcoholic, and was using back then.
I wound up going off the deep end mentally in my late teens, becoming homeless, and hitchhiking to another state. I told my stepmom that I know they were always kind of close, despite the age difference, but I thought they had gotten closer after I left. My stepmom then tells me "well, it's been speculated that they were intimate, when she was young, and vulnerable."
I admit, I had heard it once before, but I did ask my cousin if it was true and she completely denied it. After the comment about the fact she was vulnerable, I realize that it's possible he assaulted her through drug or alcohol use, or just groomed her. I hadn't really thought about it like that before and now I just feel sick. She might not even remember, she doesn't remember a lot from that time period due to the drugs.
I'm not going to say anything, especially not to anyone in my family. My brother has always been an asshole, inheriting the worst parts of our dad's alcoholism, but I never thought him capable of something like this. Fuck.
I tried to attach a screenshot of the message for proof, but I guess pics aren't allowed here.

Everything in my inventory is up for trade. The most valuable items are listed here, the rest you can find in My Inventory

Feel free to Add Me or even better send a Trade Offer. Open for any suggestions: upgrades, downgrades / knives, gloves, skins / stickers, patterns, floats.

All Buyouts are listed in cash value.

KNIVES

★ Butterfly Knife Lore (Factory New), B/O: $7194.77

★ Butterfly Knife Autotronic (Minimal Wear), B/O: $2025.74

⎯

★ M9 Bayonet Ultraviolet (Field-Tested), B/O: $557.87

★ M9 Bayonet Stained (Well-Worn), B/O: $529.41

★ M9 Bayonet Boreal Forest (Field-Tested), B/O: $465.39

⎯

★ Talon Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $1295.27

★ Bayonet Tiger Tooth (Minimal Wear), B/O: $746.28

★ Karambit Bright Water (Field-Tested), B/O: $688.15

⎯

★ Flip Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $547.93

★ Flip Knife Autotronic (Minimal Wear), B/O: $476.69

★ Flip Knife Case Hardened (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $278.18

★ Flip Knife Black Laminate (Well-Worn), B/O: $258.83

★ Flip Knife Urban Masked (Field-Tested), B/O: $181.64

⎯

★ Stiletto Knife Marble Fade (Factory New), B/O: $686.04

★ Stiletto Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $665.41

★ Stiletto Knife, B/O: $601.39

★ Stiletto Knife Crimson Web (Field-Tested), B/O: $418.25

★ Stiletto Knife Night Stripe (Field-Tested), B/O: $227.80

★ Stiletto Knife Boreal Forest (Field-Tested), B/O: $194.96

★ Stiletto Knife Safari Mesh (Field-Tested), B/O: $192.79

⎯

★ Nomad Knife Crimson Web (Field-Tested), B/O: $518.11

★ Nomad Knife Scorched (Field-Tested), B/O: $169.78

★ Nomad Knife Forest DDPAT (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $166.88

★ StatTrak™ Nomad Knife Blue Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $335.79

⎯

★ Skeleton Knife Stained (Well-Worn), B/O: $442.05

★ Skeleton Knife Urban Masked (Minimal Wear), B/O: $426.24

★ Skeleton Knife Boreal Forest (Field-Tested), B/O: $314.03

★ StatTrak™ Skeleton Knife Fade (Minimal Wear), B/O: $2361.28

★ StatTrak™ Skeleton Knife Urban Masked (Field-Tested), B/O: $376.53

⎯

★ Ursus Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $557.12

★ Ursus Knife, B/O: $471.42

★ Ursus Knife Blue Steel (Minimal Wear), B/O: $212.37

★ Ursus Knife Case Hardened (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $187.66

★ Ursus Knife Damascus Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $178.18

★ Ursus Knife Ultraviolet (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $155.13

★ Ursus Knife Boreal Forest (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $124.26

⎯

★ Huntsman Knife Black Laminate (Minimal Wear), B/O: $204.83

★ Huntsman Knife Black Laminate (Field-Tested), B/O: $184.50

★ StatTrak™ Huntsman Knife Lore (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $224.11

⎯

★ Bowie Knife Gamma Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $2142.02

★ Bowie Knife, B/O: $230.44

★ Bowie Knife Damascus Steel (Factory New), B/O: $209.20

★ Bowie Knife Ultraviolet (Minimal Wear), B/O: $180.51

★ Bowie Knife Ultraviolet (Field-Tested), B/O: $131.03

⎯

★ Falchion Knife Night (Field-Tested), B/O: $132.54

★ Falchion Knife Urban Masked (Well-Worn), B/O: $112.81

★ Falchion Knife Scorched (Field-Tested), B/O: $108.81

★ Falchion Knife Forest DDPAT (Field-Tested), B/O: $107.82

★ Falchion Knife Safari Mesh (Field-Tested), B/O: $107.46

★ StatTrak™ Falchion Knife Ultraviolet (Field-Tested), B/O: $143.08

⎯

★ Paracord Knife Crimson Web (Minimal Wear), B/O: $486.48

★ Paracord Knife Blue Steel (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $163.12

⎯

★ Survival Knife Blue Steel (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $138.26

★ Survival Knife Night Stripe (Field-Tested), B/O: $131.03

⎯

★ Gut Knife Sapphire (Minimal Wear), B/O: $1127.79

★ Gut Knife Gamma Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $286.17

★ Gut Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $246.55

★ Gut Knife Marble Fade (Factory New), B/O: $240.77

★ Gut Knife, B/O: $210.49

★ Gut Knife Lore (Field-Tested), B/O: $194.22

★ Gut Knife Case Hardened (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $151.51

★ Gut Knife Blue Steel (Minimal Wear), B/O: $124.94

★ Gut Knife Rust Coat (Well-Worn), B/O: $118.99

★ Gut Knife Boreal Forest (Minimal Wear), B/O: $109.80

★ StatTrak™ Gut Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $237.96

⎯

★ Shadow Daggers Gamma Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $264.92

★ Shadow Daggers Marble Fade (Factory New), B/O: $253.03

★ Shadow Daggers Tiger Tooth (Factory New), B/O: $237.22

★ Shadow Daggers Crimson Web (Field-Tested), B/O: $153.40

★ Shadow Daggers Autotronic (Minimal Wear), B/O: $144.42

★ Shadow Daggers Blue Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $105.20

★ StatTrak™ Shadow Daggers Damascus Steel (Minimal Wear), B/O: $150.46

⎯

★ Navaja Knife Fade (Factory New), B/O: $365.99

★ Navaja Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $228.93

★ Navaja Knife Marble Fade (Factory New), B/O: $227.43

★ Navaja Knife Slaughter (Factory New), B/O: $209.06

★ Navaja Knife, B/O: $203.16

★ Navaja Knife Case Hardened (Well-Worn), B/O: $132.57

★ Navaja Knife Damascus Steel (Factory New), B/O: $121.69

★ Navaja Knife Damascus Steel (Minimal Wear), B/O: $109.95

★ Navaja Knife Damascus Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $100.41

★ StatTrak™ Navaja Knife Fade (Factory New), B/O: $369.01

★ StatTrak™ Navaja Knife Damascus Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $109.95

GLOVES

★ Sport Gloves Amphibious (Minimal Wear), B/O: $2394.67

★ Sport Gloves Omega (Well-Worn), B/O: $572.33

★ Sport Gloves Bronze Morph (Minimal Wear), B/O: $338.88

★ Sport Gloves Big Game (Field-Tested), B/O: $323.66

⎯

★ Specialist Gloves Marble Fade (Minimal Wear), B/O: $1652.07

★ Specialist Gloves Tiger Strike (Field-Tested), B/O: $599.14

★ Specialist Gloves Crimson Web (Well-Worn), B/O: $231.57

★ Specialist Gloves Buckshot (Minimal Wear), B/O: $126.21

⎯

★ Moto Gloves POW! (Minimal Wear), B/O: $996.99

★ Moto Gloves POW! (Field-Tested), B/O: $383.31

★ Moto Gloves POW! (Well-Worn), B/O: $276.00

★ Moto Gloves Turtle (Field-Tested), B/O: $180.28

⎯

★ Hand Wraps CAUTION! (Minimal Wear), B/O: $502.29

★ Hand Wraps Giraffe (Minimal Wear), B/O: $180.73

★ Hand Wraps CAUTION! (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $178.32

⎯

★ Driver Gloves Queen Jaguar (Minimal Wear), B/O: $181.01

★ Driver Gloves Rezan the Red (Field-Tested), B/O: $101.66

⎯

★ Broken Fang Gloves Jade (Field-Tested), B/O: $127.88

★ Broken Fang Gloves Needle Point (Minimal Wear), B/O: $124.55

⎯

★ Bloodhound Gloves Guerrilla (Minimal Wear), B/O: $127.94

★ Hydra Gloves Case Hardened (Field-Tested), B/O: $102.55

WEAPONS

AK-47 X-Ray (Well-Worn), B/O: $478.95

AUG Hot Rod (Factory New), B/O: $425.83

StatTrak™ M4A1-S Hyper Beast (Factory New), B/O: $413.95

M4A4 Daybreak (Factory New), B/O: $309.51

StatTrak™ AK-47 Aquamarine Revenge (Factory New), B/O: $305.43

AK-47 Case Hardened (Well-Worn), B/O: $196.38

StatTrak™ M4A4 Temukau (Minimal Wear), B/O: $174.64

P90 Run and Hide (Field-Tested), B/O: $167.03

AWP Asiimov (Field-Tested), B/O: $153.33

Souvenir SSG 08 Death Strike (Minimal Wear), B/O: $140.00

M4A1-S Printstream (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $124.70

StatTrak™ M4A1-S Golden Coil (Field-Tested), B/O: $117.48

AWP Asiimov (Well-Worn), B/O: $115.97

StatTrak™ Desert Eagle Printstream (Minimal Wear), B/O: $112.96

StatTrak™ AK-47 Asiimov (Minimal Wear), B/O: $110.85

Souvenir M4A1-S Master Piece (Well-Worn), B/O: $102.42

AK-47 Bloodsport (Minimal Wear), B/O: $100.53

Trade Offer Link - Steam Profile Link - My Inventory

Knives - Bowie Knife, Butterfly Knife, Falchion Knife, Flip Knife, Gut Knife, Huntsman Knife, M9 Bayonet, Bayonet, Karambit, Shadow Daggers, Stiletto Knife, Ursus Knife, Navaja Knife, Talon Knife, Classic Knife, Paracord Knife, Survival Knife, Nomad Knife, Skeleton Knife, Patterns - Gamma Doppler, Doppler (Phase 1, Phase 2, Phase 3, Phase 4, Black Pearl, Sapphire, Ruby, Emerald), Crimson Web, Lore, Fade, Ultraviolet, Night, Marble Fade (Fire & Ice, Fake FI), Case Hardened (Blue Gem), Autotronic, Slaughter, Black Laminate, Tiger Tooth, Boreal Forest, Scorched, Blue Steel, Vanilla, Damascus Steel, Forest DDPAT, Urban Masked, Freehand, Stained, Bright Water, Safari Mesh, Rust Coat, Gloves - Bloodhound Gloves (Charred, Snakebite, Guerrilla, Bronzed), Driver Gloves (Snow Leopard, King Snake, Crimson Weave, Imperial Plaid, Black Tie, Lunar Weave, Diamondback, Rezan the Red, Overtake, Queen Jaguar, Convoy, Racing Green), Hand Wraps (Cobalt Skulls, CAUTION!, Overprint, Slaughter, Leather, Giraffe, Badlands, Spruce DDPAT, Arboreal, Constrictor, Desert Shamagh, Duct Tape), Moto Gloves (Spearmint, POW!, Cool Mint, Smoke Out, Finish Line, Polygon, Blood Pressure, Turtle, Boom!, Eclipse, 3rd Commando Company, Transport), Specialist Gloves (Crimson Kimono, Tiger Strike, Emerald Web, Field Agent, Marble Fade, Fade, Foundation, Lt. Commander, Crimson Web, Mogul, Forest DDPAT, Buckshot), Sport Gloves (Pandora's Box, Superconductor, Hedge Maze, Vice, Amphibious, Slingshot, Omega, Arid, Big Game, Nocts, Scarlet Shamagh, Bronze Morph), Hydra Gloves (Case Hardened, Emerald, Rattler, Mangrove), Broken Fang Gloves (Jade, Yellow-banded, Unhinged, Needle Point), Pistols - P2000 (Wicked Sick, Ocean Foam, Fire Element, Amber Fade, Corticera, Chainmail, Imperial Dragon, Obsidian, Scorpion, Handgun, Acid Etched), USP-S (Printstream, Kill Confirmed, Whiteout, Road Rash, Owergrowth, The Traitor, Neo-Noir, Dark Water, Orion, Blueprint, Stainless, Caiman, Serum, Monster Mashup, Royal Blue, Ancient Visions, Cortex, Orange Anolis, Ticket To Hell, Black Lotus, Cyrex, Check Engine, Guardian, Purple DDPAT, Torque, Blood Tiger, Flashback, Business Class, Pathfinder, Para Green), Lead Conduit, Glock-18 (Ramese's Reach, Umbral Rabbit, Fade, Candy Apple, Bullet Queen, Synth Leaf, Neo-Noir, Nuclear Garden, Dragon Tatto, Reactor, Pink DDPAT, Twilight Galaxy, Sand Dune, Groundwater, Blue Fissure, Snack Attack, Water Elemental, Brass, Wasteland Rebel, Vogue, Franklin, Royal Legion, Gamma Doppler, Weasel, Steel Disruption, Ironwork, Grinder, High Beam, Moonrise, Oxide Blaze, Bunsen Burner, Clear Polymer, Bunsen Burner, Night), P250 (Apep's Curse, Re.built, Nuclear Threat, Modern Hunter, Splash, Whiteout, Vino Primo, Mehndi, Asiimov, Visions, Undertow, Cartel, See Ya Later, Gunsmoke, Splash, Digital Architect, Muertos, Red Rock, Bengal Tiger, Crimson Kimono, Wingshot, Metallic DDPAT, Hive, Dark Filigree, Mint Kimono), Five-Seven (Neon Kimono, Berries And Cherries, Fall Hazard, Crimson Blossom, Hyper Beast, Nitro, Fairy Tale, Case Hardened, Copper Galaxy, Angry Mob, Monkey Business, Fowl Play, Anodized Gunmetal, Hot Shot, Retrobution, Boost Protocol), CZ75-Auto (Chalice, Crimson Web, Emerald Quartz, The Fuschia is Now, Nitro, Xiangliu, Yellow Jacket, Victoria, Poison Dart, Syndicate, Eco, Hexane, Pole, Tigris), Tec-9 (Mummy's Rot, Rebel, Terrace, Nuclear Threat, Hades, Rust Leaf, Decimator, Blast From, Orange Murano, Toxic, Fuel Injector, Remote Control, Bamboo Forest, Isaac, Avalanche, Brother, Re-Entry, Blue Titanium, Bamboozle), R8 Revolver (Banana Cannon, Fade, Blaze, Crimson Web, Liama Cannon, Crazy 8, Reboot, Canal Spray, Night, Amber Fade), Desert Eagle (Blaze, Hand Cannon, Fennec Fox, Sunset Storm, Emerald Jörmungandr, Pilot, Hypnotic, Golden Koi, Printstream, Cobalt Disruption, Code Red, Ocean Drive, Midnight Storm, Kumicho Dragon, Crimson Web, Heirloom, Night Heist, Mecha Industries, Night, Conspiracy, Trigger Discipline, Naga, Directive, Light Rail), Dual Berettas (Flora Carnivora, Duelist, Cobra Strike, Black Limba, Emerald, Hemoglobin, Twin Turbo, Marina, Melondrama, Pyre, Retribution, Briar, Dezastre, Royal Consorts, Urban Shock, Dualing Dragons, Panther, Balance), Rifles - Galil (Aqua Terrace, Winter Forest, Chatterbox, Sugar Rush, Pheonix Blacklight, CAUTION!, Orange DDPAT, Cerberus, Dusk Ruins, Eco, Chromatic Aberration, Stone Cold, Tuxedo, Sandstorm, Shattered, Urban Rubble, Rocket Pop, Kami, Crimson Tsunami, Connexion), SCAR-20 (Fragments, Brass, Cyrex, Palm, Splash Jam, Cardiac, Emerald, Crimson Web, Magna Carta, Stone Mosaico, Bloodsport, Enforcer), AWP (Black Nile, Duality, Gungnir, Dragon Lore, Prince, Medusa, Desert Hydra, Fade, Lightning Strike, Oni Taiji, Silk Tiger, Graphite, Chromatic Aberration, Asiimov, Snake Camo, Boom, Containment Breach, Wildfire, Redline, Electric Hive, Hyper Beast, Neo-Noir, Man-o'-war, Pink DDPAT, Corticera, Sun in Leo, Elite Build, Fever Dream, Atheris, Mortis, PAW, Exoskeleton, Worm God, POP AWP, Phobos, Acheron, Pit Viper, Capillary, Safari Mesh), AK-47 (Steel Delta, Head Shot, Wild Lotus, Gold Arabesque, X-Ray, Fire Serpent, Hydroponic, Panthera Onca, Case Hardened, Vulcan, Jet Set, Fuel Injector, Bloodsport, Nightwish, First Class, Neon Rider, Asiimov, Red Laminate, Aquamarine Revenge, The Empress, Wasteland Rebel, Jaguar, Black Laminate, Leet Museo, Neon Revolution, Redline, Frontside Misty, Predator, Legion of Anubis, Point Disarray, Orbit Mk01, Blue Laminate, Green Laminate, Emerald Pinstripe, Cartel, Phantom Disruptor, Jungle Spray, Safety Net, Rat Rod, Baroque Purple, Slate, Elite Build, Uncharted, Safari Mesh), FAMAS (Waters of Nephthys, Sundown, Prime Conspiracy, Afterimage, Commemoration, Dark Water, Spitfire, Pulse, Eye of Athena, Meltdown, Rapid Eye Move, Roll Cage, Styx, Mecha Industrie, Djinn, ZX Spectron, Valence, Neural Net, Night Borre, Hexne), M4A4 (Eye of Horus, Temukau, Howl, Poseidon, Asiimov, Daybreak, Hellfire, Zirka, Red DDPAT, Radiation Hazard, Modern Hunter, The Emperor, The Coalition, Bullet Rain, Cyber Security, X-Ray, Dark Blossom, Buzz Kill, In Living Color, Neo-Noir, Desolate Space, 龍王 (Dragon King), Royal Paladin, The Battlestar, Global Offensive, Tooth Fairy, Desert-Strike, Griffin, Evil Daimyo, Spider Lily, Converter), M4A1-S (Emphorosaur-S, Welcome to the Jungle, Imminent Danger, Knight, Hot Rod, Icarus Fell, Blue Phosphor, Printstream, Master Piece, Dark Water, Golden Coil, Bright Water, Player Two, Atomic Alloy, Guardian, Chantico's Fire, Hyper Beast, Mecha Industries, Cyrex, Control Panel, Moss Quartz, Nightmare, Decimator, Leaded Glass, Basilisk, Blood Tiger, Briefing, Night Terror, Nitro, VariCamo, Flashback), SG 553 (Cyberforce, Hazard Pay, Bulldozer, Integrale, Dragon Tech, Ultraviolet, Colony IV, Hypnotic, Cyrex, Candy Apple, Barricade, Pulse), SSG 08 (Death Strike, Sea Calico, Blood in the Water, Orange Filigree, Dragonfire, Big Iron, Bloodshot, Detour, Turbo Peek, Red Stone), AUG (Akihabara Accept, Flame Jörmungandr, Hot Rod, Midnight Lily, Sand Storm, Carved Jade, Wings, Anodized Navy, Death by Puppy, Torque, Bengal Tiger, Chameleon, Fleet Flock, Random Access, Momentum, Syd Mead, Stymphalian, Arctic Wolf, Aristocrat, Navy Murano), G3SG1 (Chronos, Violet Murano, Flux, Demeter, Orange Kimono, The Executioner, Green Apple, Arctic Polar Camo, Contractor), SMGs - P90 (ScaraB Rush, Neoqueen, Astral Jörmungandr, Run and Hide, Emerald Dragon, Cold Blooded, Death by Kitty, Baroque Red, Vent Rush, Blind Spot, Asiimov, Trigon, Sunset Lily, Death Grip, Leather, Nostalgia, Fallout Warning, Tiger Pit, Schermatic, Virus, Shapewood, Glacier Mesh, Shallow Grave, Chopper, Desert Warfare), MAC-10 (Sakkaku, Hot Snakes, Copper Borre, Red Filigree, Gold Brick, Graven, Case Hardened, Stalker, Amber Fade, Neon Rider, Tatter, Curse, Propaganda, Nuclear Garden, Disco Tech, Toybox, Heat, Indigo), UMP-45 (Wild Child, Fade, Blaze, Day Lily, Minotaur's Labyrinth, Crime Scene, Caramel, Bone Pile, Momentum, Primal Saber), MP7 (Teal Blossom, Fade, Nemesis, Whiteout, Asterion, Bloosport, Abyssal Apparition, Full Stop, Special Delivery, Neon Ply, Asterion, Ocean Foam, Powercore, Scorched, Impire), PP-Bizon (Modern Hunter, Rust Coat, Forest Leaves, Antique, High Roller, Blue Streak, Seabird, Judgement of Anubis, Bamboo Print, Embargo, Chemical Green, Coblat Halftone, Fuel Rod, Photic Zone, Irradiated Alert, Carbon Fiber), MP9 (Featherweight, Wild Lily, Pandora's Box, Stained Glass, Bulldozer, Dark Age, Hot Rod, Hypnotic, Hydra, Rose Iron, Music Box, Setting Sun, Food Chain, Airlock, Mount Fuji, Starlight Protector, Ruby Poison Dart, Deadly Poison), MP5-SD (Liquidation, Oxide Oasis, Phosphor, Nitro, Agent, Autumn Twilly), Shotguns, Machineguns - Sawed-Off (Kiss♥Love, First Class, Orange DDPAT, Rust Coat, The Kraken, Devourer, Mosaico, Wasteland Princess, Bamboo Shadow, Copper, Serenity, Limelight, Apocalypto), XM1014 (Frost Borre, Ancient Lore, Red Leather, Elegant Vines, Banana Leaf, Jungle, Urban Perforated, Grassland, Blaze Orange, Heaven Guard, VariCamo Blue, Entombed, XOXO, Seasons, Tranquility, Bone Machine, Incinegator, Teclu Burner, Black Tie, Zombie Offensive, Watchdog), Nova (Sobek's Bite, Baroque Orange, Hyper Beast, Green Apple, Antique, Modern Hunter, Walnut, Forest Leaves, Graphite, Blaze Orange, Rising Skull, Tempest, Bloomstick, Interlock, Quick Sand, Moon in Libra, Clean Polymer, Red Quartz, Toy Soldier), MAG-7 (Copper Coated, Insomnia, Cinqueda, Counter Terrace, Prism Terrace, Memento, Chainmail, Hazard, Justice, Bulldozer, Silver, Core Breach, Firestarter, Praetorian, Heat, Hard Water, Monster Call, BI83 Spectrum, SWAG-7), M249 (Humidor, Shipping Forecast, Blizzard Marbleized, Downtown, Jungle DDPAT, Nebula Crusader, Impact Drill, Emerald Poison Dart), Negev (Mjölnir, Anodized Navy, Palm, Power Loader, Bratatat, CaliCamo, Phoenix Stencil, Infrastructure, Boroque Sand), Wear - Factory New (FN), Minimal Wear (MW), Field-Tested (FT), Well-Worn (WW), Battle-Scarred (BS), Stickers Holo/Foil/Gold - Katowice 2014, Krakow 2017, Howling Dawn, Katowice 2015, Crown, London 2018, Cologne 2014, Boston 2018, Atlanta 2017, Cluj-Napoca 2015, DreamHack 2014, King on the Field, Harp of War, Winged Difuser, Cologne 2016, Cologne 2015, MLG Columbus 2016, Katowice 2019, Berlin 2019, RMR 2020, Stockholm 2021, Antwerp 2022, Paris 2023, Swag Foil, Flammable foil, Others - Souvenirs, Agents, Pins, Passes, Gifts, Music Kits, Cases, Keys, Capsules, Packages, Patches

Some items on the list may no longer be available or are still locked, visit My Inventory for more details.

Send a Trade Offer for fastest response. I consider all offers.

Add me for discuss if there is a serious offer that needs to be discussed.

So I am Asian and theres a big filal piety culture in my family, so this is conflicting me. To say what my father has done is not anything big but for me it goes against my moral judgment. To preface, my mother and father has been divorced for over 15 years now, and the location is in an Asian country just for your understanding. Him and I don't live in the same country, I moved with my mom when I was young away from my home country and only visit once a year. 2 years ago he taken a wife, they just have a ceremony but not on paper. My father is in his 50s while his new wife js entered her 30s, this women age is very close with my oldest cousin who is in her late 20s. This fact grosses me tf out, I can't stand this fact. Just this beginning of the year, he called me and told me they had a son together, ever since that called I had not talk to him. This fact had been hidden from me, and had pushed me over the edge. When I think about it, it makes me want to throw up. To think he has the audacity to have a child at his big age is ridiculous to me. I don't accept that child as my brother and will continued not to for the rest of my life. Call me heartless I know that child has done nothing wrong but I have my own personal feelings. This situation has pushed me further to want to disown him, I have lost any sense of emotions when it comes to this a year ago and already have come to term that my father passed away 2 years ago. I want to ask if going through with disowning him and changing my last name is a good thing for me? I want some direction on this road I was never meant to be on.

For context I am 17 and just broke up with my ex. We dated for about 6 months. In the beginning I actually had a massive crush on him for like 3 months. I really did like him a lot and wasn’t super shy about it since we had theatre together after school. He also liked me back so we started dating.
Now, reason why I had broken up with him is because I started loosing feelings around March. When May rolled around I began to have actual doubts about my feelings and if I wanted to be in this relationship. Thing is, there wasn’t necessarily any problems. My ex was loving and caring like any boyfriend but he had his own traumas and issues. He would overthink very often which for me became exhausting to deal with. He’d cry a lot because he was scared I would leave him or that I would like someone else. Some odd reason he always had bad dreams and would constantly cry over it. It became tiring to comfort him. I sometimes hold hands with my girl friend like any girl would and he legit told me had a dream about me leaving him for her 💀 like what? And he was scared I was gonna leave him for her. Overall he was scared of losing me. He had treated me like I was his whole world. Like I was the love of his life.
Here’s the thing, this would be sweet and cute but personally in my opinion was just not really it. I mean yeah, I loved him but he’s not the love of my life. We have only been dating for a few months not years. When we’re in advisory he’d constantly cling onto me and wrap himself around me. I didn’t mind at first but then it became too much. I just want my personal space. I guess those things just caused me to start losing feelings.
So to me the relationship didn’t hold that much meaning to me. After I broke up with him I didn’t cry nor did I feel super sad. But after a day or two I did begin to feel a bit sad because he’s a good person and bf but he just wasn’t meant for me. So that made me sad that I let go of him but it was for the best because everything was becoming a push and pull situation between us.
So now here we are a week later and on Monday my old feelings for this guy sort of rekindled ig? Idk. In the beginning of the year before me and my ex even got together I kinda had a thing for this guy who I’ll refer to as Mf bc why not. I don’t know Mf very much because 1. I don’t have any classes with him 2. No after school activities together. Funny enough his older brother and I are good friends with each other. (His brother is ok with me liking Mf btw lol) so I sometimes see Mf when me and his brother are going somewhere after school. Occasionally in the halls and such.
Ultimately I decided to shoot my shot with my ex instead. Then a week ago I broke up with him. When Monday rolled around these feelings for Mf returned when I saw him again and interacted with him. I hate the fact I like him. Because I don’t want to but i literally can’t stop it. He and I both just got out of relationships so I’m not gonna try to pursue anything. But that doesn’t change the fact I still have a crush on him which I hate.
Unfortunately yesterday I also made the realization that Mf fits my type kinda well. (Not personally yet because idk him well enough to determine) but he’s taller than me, he’s fit, lean, and has a sense of style. And to me he’s good looking. 7/10 give or take.
Besides that I just don’t understand why now? I don’t want to date him right now. Because it’s highly possible that this is just a phase I guess. So I don’t want to do anything rash. I wanna give it like a month or two to see if I really like him before actually considering if I should try to get to know him and what not. Yet I keep thinking about him and have to resist the urge to text him. Ughh. Why I gotta have a crush on this mf? And why now?
(I’m having a crisis pls send help-)
Sorry that was so long. I have to make sure there is context so I can get advice.

I'm an average black man, admittedly have some advantages that I have a job that lets me travel. & One thing I've noticed in my travels is that African American men all over the world are wildly hyper sexualized, to a point that is really only on par with the average woman's experience.
I'll take my accountability in it, yeah there was a time in my life I was a straight up hobo-sexual (staying wherever the girl I was sleeping with was at).
But even after making huge life changes and developments with the versions of myself that I can give. I've rarely seen a change in what is actually expected and celebrated by my partners.
I provide therapy around the world now, have an ngo I run with my family, etc etc. and they love that on paper, but not within the dynamic of how they want to receive me.
Yeah, they want you to have heard Nikki Giovanni, but there is no desire or belief to examine James Baldwin's part of that discussion (this is an analogy)
Idk, I got off dating sites and everything.
Still just had to ask this last woman if we could at least have dinner first before we had sex. (She was committed to just coming on by)
And I know because of how things are seen from the white male gaze that we also tend to trvialize the traumas of this experience so I'm just asking everyone, before they comment, to really see the earnestness in this share. And think of all the brothers we've seen and heard this from before.
It's not normal for men, my brothers. And we should explore what it's like to grow up on that fringe of society.

Warehouse number 866-222-9438 ext 7705555 Warehouse dispatch 609-267-6700 Checkout Bags (Paper) Small Medium Large Carrying Handle 503383 503532 560011 167943 Balloons (Balloon Vendor: Rainbow Balloons 800-200-8181) Helium (Call 888-825-1624) Ribbon Rolls Blue Red White Yellow 419930 419928 419912 419931 Weight Colors Pastel 419909 Primary 419910 BOPIS Sticker Labels 466302 Check Ribbon 106982 Counterfeit Detector Pens (please note that these do not detect all counterfeit bills) 953553 Coupon Center Paper 438059 Employee Purchase Stickers 311516 Money Cards 145319 Next Register Sign 458547 Rainchecks 451435 Receipt Paper Rolls 106983 Shopper Assistant Card 295126 Cleaning/Breakroom Cleaners All-Purpose 314104 Glass 314013 Combination Lock 282574 Cutlery Set (250 packs) 718205 Garbage Bags Large Outside Small 443549 114561 108381 Gloves Medium 624149 Large 633020 Hand Sanitizer (1gal w/pump) 363525 Paper Towels 313940 Soap Refill Dispenser FlooWall Protector 464102 488010 467691 Toilet Paper 113385 Vacuum Bags Cirrus Pro Grade 874118 Electrolux 123121 Damages/Strongpak Donation Boxes 386691 Labels Damages/CLS 451518 Food Donation 384168 Non-Food Donation 384199 Product Withdrawal 119040 RFC/Return For Credit 390252 Reverse Red Logistics Seal 224847 Strongpak Absorbent 892753 Bags "Pill" 4x6 9x12 13x18 18x24 892704 892742 892744 892746 892750 Zip Ties 422071 Office Binders 1 ½ inch 3 inch 4 inch 229690 964577 301758 Cash Deposit Bags 855621 Cash Slips (Call number on slip) Check Deposit Bags 440633 Check Slips (Call 888-750-4545) Clipboard 421420 Envelopes Damaged Price-Gun 130922 Red Bag Corporate Mail 715595 Free-format Sign (Large) 325155 Name Badge Customer Service 170509 Labels 171897 Management Team Member 185918 Pin Attachment 487552 Store Manager 170519 Paper Clips 892539 Price Labels Large Threshold AMM 970766 884281 237173 Small Threshold AMM 977330 884278 237171 Unit Threshold AMM 970759 970760 237168 Printer Paper 088369 Return Mail Labels 691643 Sale Signs 269031 Large 234446 Stapler 423012 Staples 454736 Three Hole Punch 536094 Two Hole Punch 421412 Other Black Wrap Tape 457721 Box Cutters (Safety) 587532 Label Scrapers 422204 Magnetic Key 172888 Packaging Tape 091496 Recycling Boxes 920394 Stapler 423012 Staples 454736 Telephone Cord 848454 Sales Floor Dividers Sticky T-Dividers Vitamin 920744 277483 146687 Endcap Sign Holder 793007 Flag Sign Holder 564179 Hang Tabs 358853 Inventory Control Clips 966515 J-Hooks 855411 Pegs 4 inch 4 inch cosmetics 6 inch 8 inch 422543 973842 422550 422675 12 inch DL/DPC order 2-piece 317211 Push Pins 653253 Runners/Overlays 4 inch 6 inch 6 inch cosmetics 8 inch 12 inch 184762 183731 973826 184283 972539 Stoploks 688729 Wire Basket Label Holders 972505 Wire Basket Sign Clip 298937 Photo Bamboo Ornament 365010 Banner Boxes 275483 Board Prints 11x14 425014 16x20 570511 Books 4x6 329889 8x10 439957 8.5x11 802203 Premium Faux Leather 265611 Custom Cover Layback 124727 Calendars 5x7 Bamboo 515956 8x10 487224 Canvases 5x7 252046 8x8 624246 8x10 252047 11x14 251829 Framed 795932 Hanging 588185 16x20 251942 Coasters 465064 Cubes 2x2 363220 3x3 363948 Custom Cover Journal/Diary/Notebook Kit 343769 Disposable Camera Envelopes (Call 855-652-3854) Duplex Printer (CX3240) 5x7 Flat 878071 5x7 Flat Greeting Cards 396400 5x7 Folded Cards 423843 5x7 Rounded Corner Cardstock 396376 8.5x11 Photo Book Paper 396443 8.5x11 Premium Paper 711977 Flat Rounded Corners Premium 734398 Waste Toner Box 734428 Floating Frame 388577 Envelopes Greeting Cards 4x8 426407 5x7 800412 Large 901154 Normal 901151 Magnets 2x2 Acrylic 4x6 5x5 602880 426018 515572 Media CD DVD Flash Drive 897311 858518 171000 Panels 4x6 212120 6x8 212116 8x10 212117 Acrylic Bamboo Wood 398489 398147 354391 Passport Holders 302969 Printer Refill Boxes 6800 (4x6 in seconds) 265443 7000 (4x6 hour) 996216 305 (5x7) (2 refills/box) 252064 8800 (8x10) 832490 Poster Packaging Tubes 269851 Poster Printer Poster Rolls Regular Poster Paper 405658 Repositional Adhesive Poster 275058 Puzzles 790237 Toner Duplex Printer (CX3240) Black Cyan Magenta Yellow 401395 401422 401448 401471 Poster Printer (Epson P6000) Cyan 312260 Light Cyan 393826 Light Black 502394 Light Light Black 382310 Matte Black 400104 Photo Black 407634 Vivid Light Magenta 771758 Vivid Magenta 587501 Yellow 254884 Wall Tile 8x8 304458 Yard/Lawn Sign Assembly Kit 726295 Grommets 617726 VinylMax Banner Media Roll 324024 Yellow Bags 655484 Pharmacy Bags Blue 695071 Green 458256 Prescription 982827 USPS 417098 Bandages 326957 Bottles 2 oz 4oz 6oz 8oz 16oz 340620 340646 340653 340661 340687 Boxes Records 437863 Returns 915373 USPS 418989 Caps Child-Resistant 20 108940 40-60 108942 Non Child-Resistant 20 145622 40-60 145624 Checkout Bags (Paper) Small Medium Large 503383 503532 560011 Gloves Medium 624149 Large 633020 Labels Barcode 182959 Prescription 399469 Narcotic Key Envelope 695783 Prescription Pad 1 Line 182779 2 Line 163112 Printer Paper 088369 Sharps Container 812293 Shelf Dividers 338916 Shipt Tape 895796 Stapler 423012 Staples 454736 Vials 20 40 60 145610 145611 145612 Ship from Store Box 6x4x2 374227 8x8x40 378126 10x6x4 827252 12x9x7 190165 12x12x12 354713 15x15x15 354807 18x12x12 374238 18x18x18 374241 24x18x18 374245 Bubble Mailer 378600 Hexcel Paper Wrap 496898 ORM RX HD 346334 Packaging Tape (SFS) 378599 Printer Labels 466302 PS Tape 451489 Ziploc Bag 378625

Salaam,
I’m after some advice. My father, his brother and cousin brothers have got a chunk of land in AK near Dadyal. This land was always verbally split by the elders but this land has never been legally split. On paper it just says the land belongs to , and the list of names which includes my dad , his brother and cousin brothers.
Recently there was some arguments about who will be harvesting the land etc, as my father wanted some people in the village to do it, meanwhile some of the cousin brothers had their own views on it. One cousin brother has put a stay order on the whole chunk of land.
Can anyone advise the best way of dealing with this? Has anyone been through anything similar ? Lots of people are saying the legal system is corrupt and will just try and take as much money as possible. Can anyone recommend a good solicitolegal team in AK or even Islamabad that could deal with this?
Thanks

“Your girlfriend’s here” my brother and roommate called from across the house in an obnoxious tone. I didn’t feel like getting up see what he was talking about. I didn’t have a girlfriend, my social anxiety wouldn’t allow it.
With an exasperated sigh I got off the couch. “What are you talking about? Who’s at the…”
My brain froze, she was standing there. Her, Rachel. The girl. She had barely changed, she still had those big brown eyes that had pulled me in a decade ago. She was as beautiful as the last time I had seen her.
Oh God. No.
The memories came rushing back, the memories I had spent years repressing. I had all but convinced myself that night never happened.
I had been a freshman in college, away from everyone I knew for the first time. Making friends wasn’t easy but I was far from a loner.
Rachel and I had some class together, I don’t remember what it was for. We were bored and swapped each other others Snapchat IDs.
We talked occasionally over the next few weeks, commenting on each other’s stories and stuff. Then kind of out of the blue she asked if I wanted come over her place. Her and some friends were having a movie night.
“Heck yeah” I replied with a smiley emoji. “Awesome! We plan on watching the entire LOTR trilogy, pull an all nighter but you know how that’s probably gonna go lol”.
At the time I would have barely considered us friends, but if she wanted to explore things past that I was totally cool with the idea. She was fun, kind and really pretty.
The night came and sure enough the living room floor in the house her and her friends were renting was covered in mattresses.
She greeted me with a hug, it was nice. I think that was the first time we had had any sort of physical contact. After some introductions to the people already there we settled down to watch the movie.
It's funny what your brain locks onto. Shit went to hell right after the troll is killed. Three guys and a girl abruptly stood and starting walking backwards until they were each against opposing walls. Their eyes were blank, almost clouded over.
Rachel was standing in the hallway, the Whiteclaw she was holding fell to the floor but she didn’t seem to notice. Her eyes were wide, she glanced at me for just a moment.
A few people kind of chuckled nervously, the room had a weird tension to it. Like we all knew something wasn’t right but we didn’t know what to do about it.
Each of the four took off their shirts, they threw them to the side never blinking those awful eyes.
Energy was surging through me, I needed to go. I needed out. The girl next to me screamed, I turned to see the chest of the guy standing nearest her bulging. His skin split up the center revealing writhing mass inside him!
Others began to scream and stand, all of the four who stood glassy eyed now had gapping chest cavities. With a wet squelch tentacle like appendages burst out from them!
My heart skipped a beat leaving me gasping painfully for breath. The girl next to me was lifted from where she sat and pulled towards the nearest tentacle monster.
I didn’t help her, I didn’t help anyone. Others tried running but were snatched up and entangled in those wet dark green arms!
Unlike the others I didn’t run for the door. I scrambled up the stairs, pulling myself up with my hands as my feet tried to keep pace. I lost my fingernails but I didn’t care, I needed out!
Rachel didn’t move, she didn’t so much as glance my way.
I didn’t have time to think about that. I reached the top of the stairs just as one of the creatures started up after me. I ran into the nearest bedroom and closed the door behind me.
Running on pure adrenaline I ripped open the window and climbed onto the roof. I stopped myself from jumping down, I was directly over the front door. I could see light spilling across the front yard, the door was open.
Grabbing the gutter and praying it would hold I pulled myself up above the window. I had just cleared the window when I heard the bedroom door shatter. I ran across the roof at a reckless speed.
I didn’t think, I just jumped. The house was on a hill, that fact might have been what saved me. I fell what was probably thirty feet but landed on my ass on an incline.
Rather than shattering my legs I slid down the hill. Until my foot caught something and sent me tumbling head first through the ferns and brambles.
Once I caught my footing again I ran to the bottom of the hill. I found a road and followed it. At some point I cried myself to sleep under a tree.
I never went back. I didn’t even pack my things. Somehow my car ended up back at my dorm. After searching it I climbed in and drove two states back to my parents house.
I told them I flunked out and couldn’t afford my dorm. They were pissed but I didn’t care. I should have gone to therapy but I felt like that would have been like admitting it was real. I just couldn’t do it. I buried the memories by self medicating. I lived by leeching off others for years before I started getting my life back together.
Before convincing myself that night had never happened.
“Dude, that was ridiculous”. My brother’s voice pulled me from my memories, my dream? I was back on the couch. Rachel was nowhere to be seen.
“Seriously man, she’s cute and all but passing out because a girl talked to you? That’s next level bro”. I sat up looking around “where is she?” I demanded.
“Chill man, you probably freaked her out when you went all limp. Don’t worry, not only did I catch you and drag your heavy ass to the couch I got a note from her”.
I ripped the paper from his hand. “She took off pretty quick, she looked spooked. Anyways I have to get going, someone needs to pay the bills around here”.
I ignored him, my entire focus was riveted to the hand written note.
“I’m sorry to barge into your life like this but we need to talk. It’s urgent”.
She left an address and said to be there Saturday at noon.
I don’t know what to do. My memories of that night have to be false, there was no police reports, no missing people. It had to have been in my head. Maybe Rachel can clear things up for me, give me the closure I need.

**Trigger warning for in-depth discussion of the deaths and bodies of children*\*
Many of you probably know the story of the Unknown Child, or Body #4 – the body of a baby boy recovered from the sea shortly after the sinking of the Titanic and buried in Halifax’s Fairview Cemetery. Unidentified for years, he was speculated to be either Gosta Palsson or Eugene Rice, tentatively identified with DNA analysis as Eino Panula in 2002, and definitively identified through improved DNA testing in 2007 as Sidney Goodwin. The Unknown Child has come to represent all the young lives who were lost in the disaster.
However, much less well-known is the mystery of Body #1. Pulled from the icy Atlantic on April 21^st 1912 by the cable ship Mackay Bennett, the body of an approximately 10-12-year-old boy was the first of 337 Titanic victims to be recovered. Officially, Body #1 was identified as Walter John van Billiard, a 9-year-old third-class boy who perished along with his father Austin and 10-year-old brother James William. He was buried next to his father, whose body was also recovered, in the Whitemarsh Union Cemetery of Zion Lutheran Church, Flourtown, Pennsylvania. However, doubt has always lingered among Titanic researchers and enthusiasts over the true identity of the body. In this post, I’ll examine the case for and against the body’s identification as Walter Van Billiard, investigate some other possibilities for its identity, and summarize my findings.
A few disclaimers: firstly, I’m not a professional, just someone who’s been interested in the Titanic (and specifically its child/teen passengers) for a long time.
Secondly, although I’ve never seen a detailed write-up on Body #1 before, others have discussed this topic and arrived at similar conclusions as mine, so I’m not breaking any entirely new ground here.
Finally, this post isn’t meant to disrespect or offend any of the Van Billiard family or to shatter the idea of a father and son resting beside each other. I’m just trying to take a critical look at the identification of Body #1 and suggest some alternate possibilities.
Approximately 115 Titanic passengers and crew under the age of 18 were lost, and very few of their bodies were ever found. In attempting to identify one of them, I hope to honour them all.

Part I: The Van Billiards

Walter and James van Billiard (photo here) were the two eldest sons of Austin Blyler van Billiard and Maude Murray. One or both boys had been born in Paris, France, but spent most of their lives in Africa, where the family was engaged in diamond mining. By April 1912, the Van Billiards had had four more children and wanted to return to Austin’s family in North Wales, Pennsylvania. They travelled to London, where Maude fell ill. It was decided that she would stay there with her parents and her four youngest children to recuperate, while Austin would take James and Walter ahead to America. Austin’s parents had never met any of their grandchildren before, and he wanted them to spend Easter together. Tragically, they booked third-class on the RMS Titanic, and the rest is history. No survivor accounts mention the Van Billiards by name, so it is unknown how they passed their time on the ship or how exactly they met their ends. A newspaper article (Daily Home News, April 23rd 1912) suggests the boys may have refused to leave their father, but it’s equally likely they simply arrived on deck too late to have the option of boarding a lifeboat.
What is known is that two bodies purported to be members of the Van Billiard family were later recovered and sent to Austin’s relatives in Pennsylvania for burial. Body #255, that of an approximately 40-year-old man with a dark red beard and moustache, was identified as Austin. Body #1, allegedly young Walter, was described as such:
No. 1 – MALE – ESTIMATED AGE. – 10-12. – HAIR. LIGHT.
CLOTHING – Overcoat, grey; one grey coat; one blue coat; grey woolen jersey; white shirt; grey knickers; black stockings; black boots
EFFECTS – Purse containing few Danish coins and ring; two handkerchiefs marked “A”.
Probably Third Class.
Furthermore, the “Inventory of the property found on the body of the late W. VanBilliard” adds that the purse also contained one United States cent and “three wooden disks.” This document can be viewed online at the Nova Scotia Archives website. Interestingly, “Unable to identify from clothing or effects” has been written across the middle of the page in pencil. Further down, it says “Remains shipped. See #255.”
Right off the bat, it's unclear why Body #1 was identified as that of 9-year-old Walter, as opposed to 10-year-old James – or, in fact, why a connection with the Van Billiards was made at all. The Philadelphia Inquirer of May 8^th 1912, reporting on the arrival of the bodies in Pennsylvania, states that identification was made “through the Red Cross Society and papers found on their persons.” However, no such papers are mentioned among the effects found on either body, despite this being common practice for the descriptions of Titanic victims’ bodies.
It is also noteworthy that no member of the Van Billiard family was reported as having identified or even viewed the bodies. Identification would, of course, have taken place at Halifax, where the recovered bodies were brought before being buried there or forwarded elsewhere, and I could find absolutely nothing to suggest that any Van Billiard travelled to Halifax to view them. The North American newspaper of May 8th 1912 states quite clearly that Austin’s father, Burgess James van Billiard, was in Pennsylvania when the bodies arrived. Maude and the other children were still in England, and in fact would not make the trip to America until February 1913, almost a full year after the disaster.
Moreover, it must be remembered that none of the Van Billiard family members in America had ever seen their grandsons. They may have seen photographs of them, but this doesn’t necessarily mean that they’d be able to identify a body which had spent six days floating in the freezing ocean. There are stories from other maritime disasters of the era, such as the General Slocum (1904), the Eastland (1915), and the Princess Sophia (1918) of children’s bodies being misidentified (or dubiously identified), even by close relatives. Therefore, even if Burgess van Billiard or another family member had seen Body #1, would that have conclusively proven that it was Walter (or James)? Or would it simply be a case of a grief-stricken human being clinging to the belief that their loved one was one of the few recovered from an icy grave?
According to Judith Geller’s Titanic: Women and Children First, “popular reports” of the time stated that Austin’s body was found with Walter’s clasped to his chest. However, as she goes on to state, this was not the case. This can be seen plainly from the numbers of the bodies, which were assigned in the order that they were retrieved. Body #1 was recovered on April 21^st, while Body #255 would not have been picked up until April 25^th, according to the diary of Mackay Bennett crewman Clifford Crease. Therefore, identification of Body #1 cannot have been made by its proximity to Austin Van Billiard.
The effects found upon Body #1 also do nothing to prove, or even suggest, that the body was that of Walter Van Billiard. It is true that the handkerchiefs marked “A” could have belonged to Austin, but “A” could stand for many other names of those on board the Titanic. The Danish coins are a tantalizing clue, but none of the Van Billiard family was known to have lived in or visited Denmark. (Of course, it’s possible that the coins could have been misidentified – perhaps they were actually Belgian or Boer, as the Van Billiards lived in both the Belgian Congo and South Africa; or Dutch, as Austin Van Billiard is known to have visited Amsterdam shortly before embarking on the Titanic. (Perhaps the “A” handkerchief was a souvenir from the city?) However, these are only theories.)
It has never been conclusively accepted by Titanic researchers and enthusiasts that Body #1 is that of Walter Van Billiard. Walter’s entry on Encyclopedia Titanica contains the footnote: “Because of the effects recovered with the body there has to be some doubt over the authenticity of the identification.” Similarly, Women and Children First states that “the body might in fact have easily been that of another Third Class boy.” That book’s section on the Van Billiards ends with the somber observation that “a monument to [the] husband and two sons … stands in the Whitemarsh Union Cemetery, but only two (and perhaps one) of them lie beneath it.” Whether or not Walter van Billiard was truly Body #1, one hopes that this (mis?)identification brought some solace to his surviving family members.

Part II: Other Possibilities

With it being established that there is no conclusive proof that body #1 belonged to either of the Van Billiard boys, let us examine other possibilities. I have assembled a list of all male Titanic victims between the ages of 8 and 14 whose bodies were never found. The reason for extending this range is that the estimated ages given to bodies were not always entirely accurate. For example, the body of 12-year-old William Sage was estimated to be 14, the body of 16-year-old Rossmore Abbott was estimated as 22, and the body of 17-year-old Ernest Price was estimated as 26.
Our candidates are:

1. Eugene Joseph Abbott, 13
2. Filip Oscar Asplund, 13
3. Clarence Gustaf Hugo Asplund, 9
4. William Neal Thomas Ford, 14
5. Charles Edward Goodwin, 14
6. William Frederick Goodwin, 13
7. Harold Victor Goodwin, 10
8. Frederick William Hopkins, 14
9. Husayn Mahmud Husayn Ibrahim, 11
10. William Andrew Johnston, 8
11. Albert Rice, 10
12. George Rice, 8
13. Betros Seman, 10
14. Karl Thorsten Skoog, 11
15. George Frederick Sweet, 14
16. William Albert Watson, 14

A few possibilities can be easily excluded from this list:

• Karl Skoog had been involved in a railway accident at the age of 7 and had to have his left leg and the toes on his right foot amputated. He used crutches for mobility. It is impossible that such an obvious feature as a missing or prosthetic leg would not have been noted in the descriptions of the bodies.
• Husayn Ibrahim and Betros Seman were from Lebanon. It is unlikely (though not impossible) that a Middle Eastern boy would have had blonde hair or carried Danish coins. Accounts from the era almost invariably describe Middle Eastern passengers as “dark-complexioned,” “foreign-looking,” or “Italian types” – a detail which does not appear in the body’s description.

Several more possibilities can be marked as unlikely, if not ruled out entirely:

• In the only known photo of the Goodwin family, the boys all seem to have had dark hair. The eldest boy, Charles, was also only 2 months away from his 15^th birthday, putting him at the very edge of our age range and making it relatively unlikely that he would be mistaken for a 10-12-year-old (let alone one who could feasibly be 9 years old).
  • However, one point in the Goodwins’ favour is that the body of their youngest brother, Sidney Leslie (the ‘Unknown Child’) was found, meaning at least one member of the family was above decks at the moment of the sinking.
• George Frederick Sweet was one day away from turning 15, and was not permitted (or did not want) to board a lifeboat along with his adoptive mother and sisters, implying that he looked his age and could not have been mistaken for a preteen. A purported* photograph of him circa 1912 also shows him as dark-haired. Finally, he was in second class, while the body was described as “probably third class” (although this is hardly conclusive).
• Frederick Hopkins and William Watson were members of the crew, Hopkins being a plate steward and Watson a bellboy. It is therefore possible, if not certain, that they would have been wearing some sort of uniform rather than the clothing the body was described as wearing. Furthermore, like Charles Goodwin and George Sweet, both were within several months of turning 15.

Our list is thus reduced to:

1. Eugene Joseph Abbott, 13
2. Filip Oscar Asplund, 13
3. Clarence Gustaf Hugo Asplund, 9
4. William Neal Thomas Ford, 14
5. William Andrew Johnston, 8
6. Albert Rice, 10
7. George Rice, 8

Now, let us look at each of these boys in turn and examine the evidence for and against them being Body #1.
Eugene Joseph Abbott:

• His last name starts with A, meaning the handkerchief could be his.
• He was originally from (and was returning to) the U.S., so may have carried American money.
• He was just 2 weeks past his 13^th birthday, meaning he could likely have passed for 12 (within the estimated age range for the body).
• He and his family were known to have been on deck right at the time of the sinking, rather than belowdecks in the steerage areas. His mother, Rhoda, was the only woman to be rescued alive from the water, and his older brother Rossmore’s body was found (#190).
• He may have had fair hair – his brother’s body is described as being “very fair,” though it’s unknown if this refers to skin or hair. An alleged* photo of him from the Pigeon Forge Titanic Museum shows a light-haired boy. However, both his mother and brother appear to have dark hair in photos taken of them.
• There is nothing to suggest he would have had Danish coins.

William Neal Thomas Ford:
Little is known about Ford, an English youth emigrating to the USA with his extended family and a family friend. None of their bodies are known to have been recovered (although they may be among the unidentified). He has no known connection to the letter A or to the nation of Denmark. Therefore, I see him as among the most unlikely of these boys to be Body #1.
William Andrew Johnston:
William Johnston, a cousin of William Ford, is a slightly more likely candidate for two reasons. Firstly, his father’s name (and his own middle name) was Andrew, providing a connection to the letter A. Secondly, in the one photo of him provided by the Titanic Museum in Pigeon Forge,* he appears to have had light hair.
Albert and George Rice:

• The Rice family is known to have been on either the boat deck or A-Deck on the night of the sinking (reported by family friend Bridget Mulvihill, who survived), and their mother Margaret’s body was recovered. In fact, her body was #12, meaning her body was presumably located far closer to #1 than Austin Van Billiard’s was. (Though this doesn’t necessarily mean much given how far apart the bodies might have drifted, how they might have been flung around by the ship’s foundering, etc.)
• They were originally from the U.S., having only lived in Ireland for about a year following the death of their father.
• Albert’s first name, of course, starts with “A.” One may imagine that, perhaps, Margaret Rice might have given handkerchiefs to all her sons with their own first initials embroidered on them.
• Their hair colour is difficult to determine from photographs – it looks on the darker side to me, but this may simply be due to poor lighting.

Filip and Clarence Asplund:
I believe the Asplund boys are the strongest possible candidates for body #1, due to the following evidence:

• They have, by far, the strongest association with Danish coins out of all the boys I have examined. The Asplund family was of Swedish descent; most of their 5 children had been born in the U.S., but they later returned to Sweden and had been living there about 4 years before deciding to return once again to America in 1912. Their home in Sweden was Alseda Village, Småland, located relatively far south in the country; they certainly lived closer to Denmark than anyone else on this list, and very likely passed through it on their way to England to board the Titanic. It is even possible that the coins were not Danish but Swedish – someone more knowledgeable about early 20^th-century Scandinavian currency would have to tell me how similar they looked.
• Furthermore, as they had once lived in the U.S. and were travelling back there, it makes sense for them to have been carrying American money as well.
• Obviously, the “A” on the handkerchief could be for Asplund.
• As Swedes, the boys could very well have had light hair. It’s hard to make out their hair colour in the only known photos of them (Filip, Clarence), but surviving siblings Lillian and Felix appear to have had light hair in some photos (1, 2)
• The entire family was known to have been on one of the upper decks (Boat or A) at the end. As third-class passengers, they arrived there quite late in the sinking. Mother Selma managed to board one of the later lifeboats (I have seen boats 10, 15, 4, and Collapsible C all suggested) along with children Felix (3) and Lillian (5), but somehow the three other children – Filip, Clarence, and Lillian’s twin Carl – were left on board with their father, also named Carl. Furthermore, Carl Sr.’s body was recovered (No. 142), further proving that the Asplunds were up on deck during the final plunge.

If I had to choose between the two Asplund boys for the true identity of body #1, I would suggest that it was 9½ year old Clarence, rather than 13-year-old Filip, due to the fact that those identifying the body clearly deemed it likely to belong to a 9-year-old. However, I think either boy is a likely option.

Part III: Conclusion

None of this is to say that I think the body couldn’t have been one of the Van Billiard boys. After all, there had to be *something* that caused Walter Van Billiard to be singled out amongst all the other possible candidates. Any of the clues I pointed out in this post may have been red herrings.
Maybe the “A” handkerchiefs were a parting gift from a friend whose first or last name started with that letter, or a souvenir of some city the boy had visited. Maybe the Danish coins were simply picked up off the deck, or given to this boy by a Danish passenger for whom he had done a favor. Maybe the age estimate was far off, and the boy was actually a tall 7-year-old or a very young-looking 15-year-old. Maybe Walter really is resting alongside his father in Union Cemetery, Flourtown, Pennsylvania. In the end, unless DNA analysis is ever done, we will never know the true identity of body #1.
My personal ranking of likelihood, out of all the boys examined, is:

1. Clarence or Filip Asplund (in that order), aged 9 and 13
2. Walter or James Van Billiard, aged 9 and 10
3. Eugene Abbott, aged 13
4. Albert or George Rice (in that order), aged 10 and 8
5. William Andrew Johnston, aged 8
6. William Neal Thomas Ford, aged 14
7. Harold, William, or Charles Goodwin (in that order), aged 10, 13, and 14 – I might even bump Harold (and possibly William) up higher than William Ford due to their younger age.
8. Frederick Hopkins or William Watson, aged 14
9. George Frederick Sweet, aged 14 (almost 15)
10. Husayn Ibrahim, aged 11, or Betros Seman, aged 10
11. Anthony William Sage, aged 12 – borderline impossible as Will Sage’s ticket was found on body #67, meaning that was almost certainly him. Perhaps an onboard friend of his had stolen his ticket as a prank, or they had switched tickets to keep as mementoes of each other, but I find this quite unlikely.
12. Karl Thorsten Skoog, aged 11 – impossible; his missing or prosthetic leg would certainly have been noted.

The true tragedy of Body #1 is the fact that there are so many possible candidates for its identification. In memory of all these boys and their families who were lost on the morning of April 15^th 1912.
^\I have some doubts about the veracity of some photographs from the Titanic Pigeon Forge Museum, but the vast majority of the photos I've seen from there are genuine. I can elaborate further in the comments if anyone is interested.)

I had a few weird segments of dreams today. In my first dream, I was in a room with people, a few classmates showed up before I left. A german guy took notice of me, enamored. I thought about how I must ethnically look to him, wondering why he found me attractive. He let me go, giving me permission to leave the building. I saw a spanish girl who was one of my old classmates, about to give her a makeover. She asked me to give her one. I was already eyeing the orchid lipstick next to her, wanting to try it. I wanted to use it on her, wondering about what color nail polish was here. After talking with the man, I gave him a embrace, feeling his bald head against my arm. He also had a black leather coat/jacket. I asked if he liked david cross, to which he responded eagerly, amused.
I then found myself in a room with pedophiles, with other young people there. I was unsure if I'd get to escape or not. I made friends with a blonde girl that was there. She didn't seem to like me that much. I was able to convince a fat guy who was one of the pedos, to leave. I grasped his attention, somehow being too attractive or not for him. I don't remember if he liked me or not. He let me go. I found out while talking to the girl that Ben Savage had raped her in the ass back in the '90s. He tweeted about it, owning up/admitting to it. It was surprising for an actor to do that. I took off, finding the corridor in the mall that I always see in my dreams. It leads to a hall that I take, where all the '90s stores are. In the lobby, I took my favorite hall, running through it. I tried to get as far away from the nightmarish environment I came from, yearning to be safe in this safe place. I've done this before in past dreams. The mall is usually where I go if I need somewhere safe to hide.
I couldn't believe that I was dreaming, it felt so real. I thought about how I spend too much time at the mall, like a millennial/xennial. How often I can go to the mall. I don't do this in real life, the mall is one of the only good things where I live. I ran some more, nearly lucid. I don't remember how I transitioned to the next segment.
Back home, I was leaning against the wall. There was a pipe at my side. I was probably pressed up against the metal armrest on my bed. I vaguely remember a bowl of water next to me in the dream, worried about my collection of food getting stolen. I had a couple boxes of little debbie cakes. The newest one was a vintage looking box of valentine cakes or cupcakes. I recognized it from online, seeing it on google before. Late '90s - y2k era. It had pink iced on the cakes. The sprinkles were red, white, and purple. Maybe pink too. My mom gave it to me. 'Those are rare. That's the one from the late '90s..' I told her. She nodded, agreeing with what I was saying. She knew that the boxes she saw and wanted to buy were harder to find, like the brownies and cordials. This has happened in real life, except the cakes weren't a vintage formula. My brother tried to take some, after I even covered the boxes with a sheet. The icing on some of the cakes were wrinkled imperfectly. Just then, a volleyball style net took over the room. I leaned against the piping, dodging what felt like a spider on my hand. Tarantula. The room was now just me and my brother. A group of guys included, that I did not know. I ended up killing it, smacking the spider to the ground. Before I even knew what creature it was. I felt it's thorax slightly, picturing it's bottom as white with red square specks on it. I aggressively beat it away like a volley ball, killing the spider. I was shamed for it. It turns out, it was an ancient spider. A young version of my man approached me, sympathetically. I wrapped my arms around him, gently. He mentioned a list of animes to me that he liked. I saw blue popup bubbles form in the air. I don't remember what all happened. We sat and talked, until he got up and ran back towards his friends. Almost immediately, a guy that looked like a fushion of my partner and ex/my abuser, came up to me. He had very light blonde hair and glasses, like a typical nerd in a '80s movie or sitcom. He was domineering, making this the most uncomfortable segment of the day. I saw one of my old classmates again that was in one of my last dreams, who loves michael jackson. '90s makeup was placed around, lipsticks. Vintage. I grabbed at one that was in a clear tube, reading the number on the bottom. It was probably silver. So a maybelline tube. Frosted and brown colored.
I looked into a vanity that was infront of me, a full and wooden one. I think it was wood. I was looking for some liquid lipstick, hearing the guy who seemed like my partner say the words 'liquid lipstick' to someone behind me. I picked up a green lipgloss, liquid and in a small thin tube. I already had a blue-green lip stain on, satin finish. I applied the green to my lips, ruining the lipstick that was on before. And it was barely covering my full lips. It was subtle. The green streaked over my natural lip line, looking liquidy. One of of the two pictures ontop of the wooden dresser, a few feet away, was a photo of madonna. It had the words, 'natural beauty' on it. Her red lipstick was also liquid and overdrawn, clownish. Both ads had women with the same forehead length. Martian looking. There was a miniature figurine on the floor, along with wrapping papers and plastic underneath it. I was wearing a futurism outfit, with footy boots. Barberella vibes, I was getting. I heard the guy explain that he was a feminist, trying to virtual signal to the other women in the room. He mentioned creating something to spread awareness on endometriosis. Which I actually have. I took notice of the tiny figurine, unaware that he was approaching me. I immediately flipped onto my back, seeing my boots change. From futuristic and footed, to clear and translucent boots. With laces on them. He tied my boots for me, which embarrassed me. We made eye contact as he tied my boots. I laid on my back, looking at the miniature figurine, unable to get any look at it at all because it got wrapped up. Right as I turned my head to look. Across from me was another girl. I was not able to react, placed in a plastic seal. I got zipped up inside it, looking at the girl in front of me. In her own plastic sealed case. A bed inside it. Brown and 1960s era. It was like we were dolls, ready to be shipped and packaged for the toy store. I woke up after this.

Prev Royal Road Patreon
Karghol stepped forward. As Rob he might be scared, but he'd been the leader of the group for a long time, operating as our main tank across a ton of games, and now, I could see him taking that step again, "Okay, first thing's first. If they're gonna pop us out of this from the outside, then that's not on us, but we've all seen this anime. If they're not coming, then we need to get to the endgame as fast as possible."
"Nope," I shook my head, surprising even myself at how quickly I'd said something.
He turned, "What? I mean, we gotta get out ahead of this."
"In most games, I'd agree, but not here, not in this game. Also, side-point but decision time for everyone: Real names or character names? I can't keep flipping between them. Lugh is what's on my party registry, so I'm sticking with Lugh," It seemed small but wasn't.
I'd learned well enough that giving people all of the information was most often counter-productive at best. Giving people a small, immediate choice was far preferable and got them on the path to understanding better. Temur snorted slightly at the absurdity, "Well, I suppose you can call me either Temur, or Temur. Whichever floats your boat."
Several groans came out, and finally, some laughter. I mean, it was dad joke humor to be sure, but jokes were probably going to become a much more specific thing for us. From there, everyone chose their character names, either because it was simply easier given the nametags in our party rotation, or because they just didn't want everyone knowing their real ones. Khargol however, was a slight agitated, "Alright, so why not speedrun it?"
"Because speedrunners die and reset constantly."
The slight mirth died out in the room, but Khargol wasn't ready to yield the point, "I've watched you do a no-death run of Dark Souls!"
I nodded, "And do you have any idea how many times I died in that game getting to that level of skill? Look, this isn't Dark Souls. That game has set difficulty levels. Yeah, it's got solid AI, but here? The AI adapts to tactics, and I'm pretty sure the beta test players are about to learn that the hard way."
Everyone was a bit curious at the statement, but it was Shelara who spoke up, "What does that 'adaptive AI' mean?"
I sighed, and took a seat at the head of the table, with Khargol finally sitting down next to me, "It means the AI of the system is learning. Beta testers essentially get to play ahead of the general public to try and stress test the system under actual play conditions. Most usually, they'll try to learn as many exploits as possible, so even if they start out on brand new characters, they're still going to be far ahead of the pack, getting gear and coin ahead of others. Assume that the beta testers have watched things like SAO or other 'trapped in a video game' style series, and they're doing the same as Khargol is suggesting. Problem is, that's exactly what a bunch of them already did, and if the AI works like it's supposed to, then it's ready for them.
"For Valorian Saga, one of the biggest selling points was its adaptive AI system, a system that learns. What that means is that the system behind bosses has already learned those exploits from beta testers and has some sort of answer for them, and they're going to run dead into them."
Chrysta sat forward, leaning her elbows on the table, at least in part to show off her biceps, "Well if a speedrun is out of the question, then what do we do instead?"
Shelara cut back in, "But... shouldn't we try and go save the beta testers?"
I considered, "Shelara, in answer to your question, we can't. Even assuming we could catch up to wherever they're at, there's almost no chance they'd listen to us if we did. They're just as likely to assume we're rivals, or to think we're idiots, but regardless they won't be following our instructions just because we say so. As far as they're concerned, they already know this game, and we're a bunch of sprouts who are panicking. Even if we could get past that point, we don't know the game like they do, and we're more likely to end up needing saving before we ever get to them.
"As to the other question, Chrysta, what we do now is finish up the starter quests, then we use our flyers to join the militia."
Every MMO veteran groaned openly. Arkadi especially was annoyed at the concept, "Come on, man, faction-grinding on day two? We're not even out of the gate yet!"
I'd expected this, and checked my in-game clock, and swore under my breath. We needed to get moving, with only roughly eighteen minutes of daylight left, "Guys, that's why we need to join the militia. It's safe, and grinding up our faction rep with Valoria opens a lot of doors, not least of which is giving us barracks space to live in free of charge, basic equipment upgrades, and getting coin. That's just the short-term gains. Yeah, not much, but it gives us a foundation. We get the lay of the land, and we build up our strategies. There's another reason though, and it's important."
Khargol nodded, "As militia, we get arrest powers in line with the laws of Farrelston."
"Wait, we'd be cops?" Shelera seemed slightly hyped about the concept.
I nodded, "More or less. We aren't out in the main room right now cause everyone's losing their minds out there. They're all coming to terms with the idea that this place is where they might die, and that breeds desperate reactions. Fourteen million players split between fifty servers, giving an average server population of... two-hundred-eighty thousand per server give or take for server popularity. Assume maybe one percent of that go fully around the bend and get violent, and that gives us two thousand eight hundred violent criminals that just hit the city on this server that have the ability to level up within the system.
"Farrelston has to be a safe space for players to return to, but that can't happen if there isn't order, and that means law enforcement."
One of our newcomers made her presence felt, the elf woman from the cathedral, shaking as she spoke, "I'm Layala. What about my brother?"
Tom... "I don't know. I don't what happens to those who die in the game. Maybe they wake up, maybe they're just comatose in a hospital somewhere, or maybe they're gone."
I let it sink in for everyone. Layala's eyes fell to the table as she slowly wept. I hate this, but sugarcoating the thing wasn't good for anyone, "All I can work on right now is keeping us all alive. This is a fantasy RPG, so for all I know, there might be another way to get them back, but I don't want to get anyone's hopes up. Anyone who knows someone who didn't respawn, we'll keep a journal of names, to see that they're remembered. We chronicle the dead, and if the opportunity to get them back presents itself, we go all-in on it.
"I know we all have questions... but we can't stay here to answer them all, and I don't have all the answers for you. We need to start moving, and moving now. We've got thirteen people here, our five and the eight we added on. We've got enough people to form a guild when the time comes, so we should start acting like a guild now."
Layala's voice cracked, "I-I nominate Lugh."
I was startled. I've been very game-knowledgeable, but I wasn't the leader type. It was never my role in the group.
"I second the nomination."
Khargol. My head whipped around, "Look, guys, I'm not a leader. I know stuff, that's what I've got. Khargol's the one who leads."
Khargol shook his head, "Not here, not in this game. I'm all good for the tanking, but you're the only one of us who's putting out a plan of attack, and I'm getting more lost by the minute. It sucks dude, and it hurts to admit it to myself, but you're the guy this time."
Nods occurred, and by show of hands, I was almost unanimously elected to command the 'guild', minus my own dissenting vote. Well.... crapbaskets, "Alright, fine. I won't argue it, but we've gotta get a move on. Get the starter quests going, and when we unlock the job change system, we'll work things out from there. Until then, we'll break into three parties, two four-man parties, and one five-man. Khargol, you're in charge of the five-man, Temur and myself are the other party leaders for now. We'll meet at the barracks come sundown. We spread out the neos amongst the three parties so they're all protected, and we get started. Don't do any combat quests alone."
I picked up Shelera for my party's neo, along with Chrysta and Layala, and the parties agreed to meet up in front of the barracks around sunset so we could join up together. We fought the press of bodies in the tavern to get out into the streets, and headed off for our quests. I could feel my heart racing a bit, the whole thing feeling like some sort of bad dream, but we would need a minute to get things together, "Okay, let's check everyone's quest logs. Any shareable quests, share them with the group so we can all help out and get rewards. We tackle them from lowest to highest."
We moved through the streets to the first quest, running messages around the city for the heralds. The quest was designed to get new players oriented with the larger city of Farrelston and what factions existed within it. The vast majority of players though, were barely moving, either pressed into the tavern or milling about in front of the cathedral. This was a huge problem, and we were finding clusters of people around, hiding and trying to just deal with the enormity of it all. We were running messages to guards, merchants, and nobles on what was a very low-key questline while watching people crying or raging. Shelera moved up next to me, close to tears herself, "We can't do anything?"
a I halted, and looked around again, and noticed some people who weren't in groups. Solo players who had come in by themselves, the same as you'd see in any MMO, and now they were cut off from the world, friends, family, and no party. Solo players really only existed in MMOs, people who would just fill in the gaps, and otherwise keep to themselves, and it worked in the world of video games. In the real world, though, it wasn't good, "We can do a little."
I jogged over to where a powerfully built Dracon with a sword and shield was balled up on the ground, weeping, purple-scaled head buried in his arms. I knelt down next to him, laying a hand on his shoulder, "Hey, what's your character name?"
The Dracon boy looked up imploringly, his voice quavering, "Umbaar..."
"Hi, Umbaar. I'm Lugh, and these are my friends. Why don't you come with us? You can join our party," I kept my tone even by pleasant.
He nodded sheepishly and accepted the party invite, "My mom's gonna kill me. I wasn't even supposed to be playing the game."
Oh God, no, "How old are you, Umbaar?"
"I'll be fourteen in December."
Due to the nature of the game, the minimum age for Valorian Saga was eighteen. He'd likely gotten access to the rig, and just jumped on, and now he was trapped, "I'm sure right now, your mom's just worried about you, but we'll keep you safe. Come on, we've got quests to do."
The absurdity of our questing was fully growing with each step we took. After running messages, we helped the watch with investigating some local crimes to learn the search system, worked with merchants on trading to get the economy down, and along the way, we found some more solos to fill us out to the party cap of eight. The jobs were immaterial to me, but Shelera and Layala both found comfort in picking up more people, with the latter taking over care of Umbaar. NPCs went about their day's work, and I started to catch on to something, "Hey... is this day... running long to anyone else?"
Games don't use full twenty-four-hour days, using a shorter day and night cycle to give the impression of a world without having to artificially inflate the game to make it feel like a full day. Valorian Saga had, in the videos, been shown to have a twenty-minute day, and twenty-minute night, but as we ran around, it had been far more than twenty minutes now. The sun had barely moved in the sky, which given the rest of the game's level of detail wasn't something they would've ignored. Chrysta spoke up after counting her clock, "Uh... well dearheart, I do believe we've got us a twenty-four cycle now."
There were several possibilities to this, perhaps either our minds changed gear to work with in-game time, or the game had altered to have twenty-four-hour time. Either way, we had no answers for it. I was getting a bit sick of having more and more questions I couldn't answer, but I couldn't focus on it in the here and now. I called a halt, and we found a small corner tavern to get food and drink. I took some time with the menu system, and up popped the character status window.
By statistics, we were moving up a bit, but the main stats of our jobs weren't changing very much at all. My basic stats for movement had risen, but not by much, and the gain was tapering off. That was probably from all the walking around the city we were doing. Reputations were going up in the city guilds attached to our quests, but again, they were minor improvements, and the effective XP was tapering off from doing them. I took out my character journal, a system conceit by the devs that the game world was simply too grand in scale to not allow a lot of notetaking, and did stat-math just like when I would spreadsheet my builds at home. From what I could see, the game had no true 'leveling' system. Instead, skills and attributes were built up by how you played, sort of like in Skyrim, but the same actions would not keep getting you the same degree of XP. A common enough point, or else someone could pull a South Park and just merc wolves until they hit the cap. Abilities would unlock as your stats rose, some coming online automatically like Sprint, while others you had to find a trainer for, such as the Double Knock ability for archers. From what I'd seen online, the abilities would unlock advanced jobs, and certain combinations would unlock hybrid jobs, so a Paladin would be a combination of a knight and acolyte. None of the testers had gotten that far, however, they'd just seen the possibility of it.
I noticed Shelera leaning over to look at my journal, and I smiled, "Just doing nerd stuff, plotting my progression to figure out what jobs I need."
She smiled back, "That seems weirdly normal. What are you thinking of doing?"
"Well, for now, I need to move up my abilities as a Hunter, right? Hunter eventually leads to a few choices, so I'm thinking I'll probably go for a Ranger build. That means I can train up Yndress here as a battle companion."
Yndress had been flying about with me, and sometimes resting on my shoulder, and now, she was curled up by my arm on the table as I continued. Shelera reached over and petted Yndress, "That is so cool. She's so warm. I totally should've figured out a way to get the limited edition... so what should I be leveling up?"
"Well, you're a vagabond, so you might look at something like Bounty Hunter since we're working with the militia. Combine that with another job.... huh."
"What?"
Daeva grinned, "Oh, sweetie, he just worked somethin' out. What do you need, Lugh?"
"Give me a minute. I need to go to the scrivener," I shot up and stepped out of the tavern.
It wasn't far to the scrivener where I could buy the supplies I needed. We'd just done an ink delivery there, and now, I would need paper and ink to work with. Returning, I cleared off the tavern table and laid out a large scroll used for maps, currently unmarked, "Okay, I need everyone to bring up your character pages and stand where I can read them."
Gamers generally do have a sense of when someone's worked out an exploit, and this was one of those times. They brought up their screens so I could start marking down abilities, attributes, and skills. Of note, my Scibing ability was ticking slowly upward as I laid things out. Scribing could turn into runic writing and other more arcane and mundane pursuits. What I was working on became a skill tree system, with the various jobs being grouped together. I had to move things around, and in real life I wouldn't be able to do that with ink, but in the game sense, it was pretty simple. I kept moving around my drawing, finally starting to come into a workable initial system of abilities, jobs, and other things that built off of one another. It look a bit mad, like if no one had stopped the devs on Path of Exile's skill tree, but it was there, "We're thinking about this wrong. We need to get to the barracks. I don't want to explain this twice."
Banded back up, I stopped by our newest unlock: Carriage Stations. The city was entirely too big to be running around it all the time, and for just half a silver, we could go to any other ward in the city. I signaled the coachman, handing him my flyer, "Take us to the militia barracks."
The coachman nodded sharply, "Right you are, sir."
The coaches held four, so we split between the two, and I rechecked my numbers. I was pretty certain I was right by the math, but these things didn't always pan out like you wanted, so it was best to recheck. It still seemed to be working out like I thought, but I needed Temur for a blind study of it. We got out at the barracks, a building made up of fortified walls and barred windows with internal shutters. Militiamen NPCs were standing guard out front, while we could just see some working in the training yard to the side. From what I could see, however, we were the only players here.
Temur's party arrived first, and apparently, I wasn't the only one picking up strays as two carriages emptied of people. He was running a full party as well now, and grinning in his uniquely Temur way, even if he did have draconic features now, "So, I see we're all taking in the lost little lambs?"
"I mean, sure, why not? That's how we met, so why not do it here, too?"
He nodded, "Questing went well, if a bit hum-drum, but you have a look in your eyes that says you've worked something out. You got math time!"
I nodded, "Waiting for... yeah, Khargol went off-road, I see."
Temur and I had shown up with two carriages each, only for Khargol to pull up with four, all packed. That put our new numbers at thirty-two players as he practically bounced up to us, "What?!"
We both shook our heads, "Nothing, man. Never change. I've got some news for everyone."
The full mass moved over to the side of the building so we weren't obstructing the entrance, "Party people, I worked something out at lunch."
I rolled out my map of the skills tree, "Okay, so I was going over my character screen, and did some math. I know what we need to do: We need to move up on every job."
Khargol shook his head, "Isn't that gonna leave us as jacks of all trades? We'd be running pretty average."
I gestured with my hands a bit in dismissal, "Usually, you're right, but here, it's different. The stats aren't really separated here, they're intended for cross-classing, and it's not just the combat jobs. I moved up a bit at Scribing here, and it looks like it'll be the same for crafting and gathering jobs. Move up in X, Y, and/or Z jobs and you unlock a hybrid. So like, say you move up as a blacksmith, armorer, and weaponsmith. All three have abilities building into one another, and that can unlock further abilities, other jobs, a whole classification of things we can't see yet.
"Using abilities works up the stats associated with that ability, and the higher the ability, the more XP it generates for the stats. Those stats still stay there when you do a job change, so you could be a Gladiator working up strength by working the forge."
Shelera looked over the drawing, "Okay, so you think if we take every job up, then that'll make us a lot stronger? But won't we end up with a bunch of usless stats?"
I shook my head, "No, for two primary reasons. For one, what if instead of Paladin, you went something like a Hexblade in D&D terms? Or, Shelera, you take Bounty Hunter, then build up your hunter job to Scout, and you have something akin to a Justicar class? Or Khargol, what if you master every weapon group?"
Temur's interest was peaked at mention of Hexblade, "And what is the second reason?"
I sucked in a breath, "It's a job change system. There's a job change skill, and every basic skill I've seen has upgrades, even if I can't see the end of the trees yet. The adaptive AI is going to adapt to our individual tactics, but even if all of us were playing hunters, we'd all approach hunting differently, maybe more reliant on archery, or snares, or pets. It would force the AI to keep readapting its own tactics on the fly. If we build up, we might just be able to get to something better than the sum of our parts."
Karghol nodded, "And that makes it doubly important we get going on the militia stuff. Shall we?"
The lot of us went over to the barracks, where a guard greeted us at the door, "Hold, citizens. What is your business with the thirteenth Valorian militia?"
I stepped forward, "We're here to enlist for service."
The guard perked right up, "Ah, good. Greetings and well met! I am Sergeant-at-Arms Brant. We are in need of stalwart folk to help protect Farrelston and wider Valoria in these trying times. Dark things are afoot both at home and afar, and it speaks well of you that you would choose service. Please, enter the hall, and register yourselves with Yeoman Granger. Welcome once again, may the purple dragon fly eternal!"
Prev Royal Road Patreon

I have been going out clubbing on girls night about once a month, and it morphed into me sitting on the couch while my friends flirted and made out with guys. I would talk to the 'spare' guy, but absolutely no flirting, kissing or touching.
I know two of the girls in the group from uni, and the rest of the girls are friends of friends. We would go clubbing (where I live has quite the night life, and my city is a bit of a tourist destination, so it's always busy), have a few drinks and dance, then head home. The last few times I went with them (I usually only go once a month, but most of them seem to go every week, or even twice a week), my friends have been meeting guys rather than just dancing, and then going back to someone's place to flirt and make out. One of the group, who I have dubbed Barracuda (she honestly scares me and totally gives off that vibe) lives with her bf, but when he was away for work was when the girls would invite guys back to her house. Barracuda has been doing a lot of flirting with the guys who come back with our group, and more than once she has gone to one of the bedrooms with a guy for an hour or so. I'm honestly a bit naive and always assume the best of people, but even I'm guessing she has cheated on her boyfriend. She doesn't kiss or make out with anyone in the public areas of the house where I can see, but what else would they be doing in a bedroom for that long?
It gets a little worse. My girl friends never wanted me to bring along my fiancé, because he'll "cramp their style" for what's basically become making out with guys. I get pretty bored sitting around waiting for my friends to finish flirting or kissing these guys, so I would sometimes sit and talk with the 'spare' guy who wasn't paired up with one of my friends. I felt super guilty about hanging out with these guys when my fiancé is waiting for me at home, but I also feel guilty about leaving these guys sitting there waiting on their friends. I never flirt or touch them or kiss them, but the thought of my handsome, kind, generous fiancé sitting at home while I'm chatting to guys had me twisted up with guilt. I don't know exactly how I got into this situation, but my fiancé has gently pointed out to me a couple of times that I can be a bit of a people pleaser, so there's that. 🥲
So based on many comments on my first two posts, and some hard thought on my end, I decided to claim I was busy (not hard since we are part-way through my exam block for uni) and not attend the next girls night, until I could figure out how to tell my fiancé what was going on. In my last two posts, I got some good advice on how to broach the topic, so I was just figuring out the best one to suit me.
I told my fiancé that I wasn't going out for girl's night this weekend because some of the girls made me uncomfortable, but he just nodded and didn't say anything, staring off into the distance. I was kinda bummed because I was hoping that would prompt some questions which would lead to a conversation in a natural way. I tried again by telling him I was cutting contact with the girl group, but he didn't really react to that either.
Frankly, he seemed kind of out of it all week, really distracted and giving short answers, staring off into the distance a lot. He hadn't rejected me when I hugged him or snuggled or kissed, but he never initiated this last week, which isn't normal. I figured he was stressed from work, but his behaviour kinda weirded me out.
Come the night of girls night, I was sitting in the lounge room watching some reality TV (trashy, I know, but I was really on edge and needed a distraction) and idly going through my notes for my upcoming exams. My fiancé had been in his study all day (catching up on work even though it was a Saturday) when he finally emerged. He stopped dead, his expression surprised, and asked me what I was doing. I told him I was waiting for him to finish work so we could spend some time together. He got this really weird expression on his face, and didn't seem to know what to say. I reminded him that I had decided not to go to the girls night out, and had told him earlier in the week. He still didn't seem to know what to say, and didn't ask any questions.
Eventually, he told me that a friend of his needed some help, and he'd be gone a few hours. I asked if he'd like me to come, and I swear his face got an almost terrified expression on it. I told him I could change if he needed me to (I was dressed in some jeans and a t-shirt), but he said it would be best if I didn't get involved. Which was a super weird thing to say, but this week has been super weird all up. He then left, and I took the opportunity to finish writing my thoughts out and prepare for how to tell him. An hour or so after my fiancé left, I started getting weird text messages from a couple of my girl friends. Apparently, Barracudas bf came back in a surprise visit, and caught her red-handed. I got some accusatory text messages asking if I set her up or something. I texted back for more details, but then I think I got blocked.
At first, I thought I was lucky I hadn't been there, but it gets more complicated.
My fiancé came home around midnight, and I rushed to the door to give him a hug and let him know what was going on with my girl friends (at least what I could figure out). But he held me at arms length, which really hurt. I asked what the hell was going on, in a fairly straightforward manner (not usual for me), and he looked startled, but asked me to come with him to the lounge room. We sat down, and he dispassionately told me about Barracudas bf installing a door cam, and figuring out his gf was cheating on him. He'd planned to catch her in the act by pretending to fly to work the day before and stay in a hotel, but he also contacted my fiancé since I was the only other attached girl in the situation. My fiancé planned to turn up and catch me in the act if I was cheating as well.
At this point, I burst into tears because I don't handle confrontation well, and I couldn't get any words out between sobs. I was an absolute mess - this wasn't a couple of tears and glimmering eyes like in the movies. It was an ugly cry with snot and my entire face blotchy. I couldn't explain myself and just shoved the paper I'd been writing my thoughts out on at him while blubbering incoherently.
He found me a box of tissues, and I tried to clean myself up while he read through my somewhat disjointed notes. In the end, he asked me point blank if I had ever cheated on him, and I remember shaking my head vehemently, and trying to deny it through tears. He nodded, saying some of my girl friends there that night has vouched for me, though they seemed convinced I had ratted Barracuda out to her bf. He asked me if I had known what Barracuda was up to, and my tears had subsided enough that I was able to explain that I suspected what she was up to, but hadn't seen anything myself.
He rolled his eyes at that, looking exasperated, and asked me what would anyone think at that point. I started crying again, but managed to get out that I hadn't felt it was any of my business, but that I had wanted to tell him, and that's why I had drafted the notes.
My fiancé raised his voice at this, and started shouting about how he would want to know if he was being cheated on, and people who know about cheating and don't say anything are almost as bad as cheaters. His voice was still loud as he told me he was really angry at my lack of boundaries, and staying there to talk to guys had violated his trust. I was shocked at this point. My normally quietly assertive fiancé was shouting, and I couldn't recall that ever happening before. Sure, we'd had some arguments in three years of dating, but we rarely even raised our voices and always kept things civil. This time, his jaw was clenched and veins were standing out in his neck and forehead. His eyes were wild, and I admit I got this little tingle of attraction that I couldn't explain. I should have felt worried because I'd never seen him so angry, but I still felt totally safe with him.
He calmed himself down pretty quickly, and I thought maybe we'd start sorting things out. But then he looked at me, and it was really sad, combined with some betrayal and a tiny bit of contempt. He'd never looked at me like that before, and suddenly I knew we were NOT okay. I started sobbing again, and he told me he was sleeping in the guest room, and we'd talk more in the morning.
I honestly think I was still in shock and reacting slowly, because before I knew it, my fiancé had collected his pillow and phone charger, and the guest room door was locked. I pounded on the door a bit, and begged him to talk to me, but he ignored me. I eventually went to sleep in our usual bed, wearing his favourite hoodie that smelled like him. In the morning, my fiancé was waiting for me in the kitchen/informal dining area.
He told me that I had broken his trust by hanging out 1-on-1 with guys instead of having him there, and not reporting what was happening in terms of cheating. What really sucks is that he wasn't even a tiny bit wrong. I know that now, and my guilt earlier kinda told me I knew earlier as well. I apologised profusely, saying I would never do anything like that ever again. I asked him what I could do to earn his trust back, and his answer had me flabbergasted. He said I needed to move out, "get my crap together", get some counselling, and build better boundaries. After that, he might be able to trust me again, when he'd seen that I'd made some big changes, but it wasn't an automatic thing, and we might not get back together.
I felt like I was in an alternate universe. I managed to stammer out that I didn't have money for counselling, or enough to pay for food, petrol, and bills, let alone rent. Couldn't I stay here and make it up to him?
He refused, saying I needed to move out on my own and go to counselling. That it would be an important first step in building some proper boundaries. I burst into tears again at this point, and begged him not to break up with me and kick me out, that I loved him and wanted to be with him. He said he loved me too, but it hurt to look at me right now, and he needed space.
It took me a couple of minutes to calm myself down. Once I could talk coherently again, I told him I understood, and wanted to give him that space, but I had nowhere to go. I know there's a worldwide housing crisis, and many fellow Redditors will be familiar with the problem of finding housing. Where I live, it's a common practice to outbid others on rent by simply offering to pay more. Apparently, there's some legislation coming soon to my state to fix that, but it sure ain't here now, and finding affordable housing at short notice is practically impossible. I am also halfway through my exam block (which I've been studying hard for, but still have two exams left), and this was going to be incredibly disruptive to my studies. Honestly, I was trying not to hyperventilate - my fiancé was breaking up with me, I had to move out with zero notice, couldn't think of anywhere to live, I was halfway through super stressful exams for my Masters, and I wouldn't be able to pick up more work shifts with my current study load for at least another week.
My fiancé said he'd organised some short term accommodation for me, and I needed to pack some bags. I was in shock. He walked to the bedroom and pulled out my suitcases as I followed him on autopilot, then we packed almost silently together. It was the most surreal feeling as I watched most of my belongings make their way into my luggage. I realised just how much my fiancé had bought for me over the three years we were together - clothing, shoes, make-up. My phone and laptop had been gifts, as he wanted me to have the best to do well at uni. He'd bought me entire outfits so I could feel beautiful while helping him schmooze at his business parties. My smart watch, that I really only wore at the gym. Some noise cancelling headphones so I could focus on uni assignments and exam prep. He'd even bought me the luggage we were packing in, for a couple of overseas holidays we'd gone on over the years. I managed to sneak his pillow in place of mine, and I was still wearing his hoodie from sleeping in it.
Before I knew it, all my stuff was in the backseat of my little hatchback, and he took one look at me and said he'd drive me to the temporary accommodation. He gently pushed me in the passenger side and did up my seatbelt, then got in the driver's side and started driving. He drove north a few suburbs, getting closer to my university, and pulled into some underground parking for high rise apartment buildings. He parked, we got some of my luggage out, and took the lift without saying a word. I was still trying to process everything, but suddenly realised I was about to lose my perfect fiancé over stupidly keeping my mouth shut when I shouldn't have. I managed to get my arms around him, and clung on like a baby koala and wouldn't let go. I was blubbering that I loved him and would do anything, even wearing all the lingerie he had bought for me. 🫣 He was blushing at that, but managed to push my luggage out of the lift, and then lumbered down the hallway with me clinging on him with both my arms and legs wrapped around him. A family with young children was coming out of their apartment and saw us, watching shocked as I clung to him, blubbering and making wild promises of all the things I would do to him in bed, as he tried to open the door to my temporary accommodation. He got it open, and then the husband of the little family helped him get all the luggage from the lift and inside the door as I continued crying and begging him not to break up with me. He thanked the man, then got the door closed, and waddled with me into the bedroom. We flopped back onto the bed together, and I started kissing his neck and giving the little nibbles he likes on his neck and ears, although the effect was kinda ruined as I'd been crying a lot, and was snotty again at this point. He got me some tissues from the night-stand next to the bed, and I cleaned up, but still had my legs locked around his waist. He managed to disentangle me, then stood up. I was about to grab him again, but his face was kinda cold, and I shrank back, feeling humiliated.
He asked for the engagement ring back, and the waterworks started again as I struggled to get the ring off my finger with shaking hands. I managed it, then threw it at him in a pique of anger. That beautiful diamond and white gold ring hit him in the chest, but he just caught it on the rebound, and it didn't even hurt the heartless man at all. He said he'd text me all the details I'd need for where I'm now staying, and that I should reach out to my work to see if I could get more shifts to make ends meet. I was just getting angry at this point, and told him to get lost. And with that, he left, the door banging shut behind him.
It's mid-afternoon, and so much has gone down in such a short time. The entire course of my life has changed in what amounted to one evening and a morning. Less than 24 hours. I'm sitting on the tiny balcony that this one bedroom apartment has, huddled in my ex-fiancé's hoodie to keep warm from the stiff sea breeze, about ten floors up and looking out at the blue-grey sea. True to his word, he texted me the address of where I'm staying, details on how to pay the rent and bills (he was careful to say twice that I didn't need to pay any rent for the next two weeks due to my studies), details on the included parking space and the code for the parking lot gate. He must have got all this ready during the week leading up the night I'm now referring to as 'Operation Barracuda'. No wonder he was standoffish.
Ugh, I can't start crying again. My eyes hurt, but my heart hurts more. I just completely blew up my life with some lies of omission, and destroyed my ex-fiancé's trust in me. At least I have a counselling session to look forward to. He texted me the details of my first session, which he carefully booked around my uni classes and exams. He said the first dozen sessions are already paid for. He's broken up with me, but still looking after me. Dammit, I'm crying again.
So, Reddit, is it really over with my ex-fiancé? Is there anything I can do to get back together with him, or is it truly over? I know I need to focus on my studies, especially since I'm partway through my exam block, and I need to pick up a lot more work shifts when my vacay starts in mid-June. I have counselling lined up. What else should I be focused on? What pieces of my life do I try and pick up? Do you think there's anything constructive I can do with my ex-fiancé?
TL;DR I had been going out clubbing on girls night about once a month, and it morphed into me sitting on the couch while my friends flirted and made out with guys. I would talk to the 'spare' guy, but absolutely no flirting, kissing or touching. My fiancé found out from another girls bf, who was being cheated on. I had hesitated to tell my fiancé about it, as I had previously felt it wasn't any of my business. I had plans to tell my fiancé, but he found out first, felt I had poor boundaries, then broke up with me and kicked me out with less than a day's notice.

So this is my first time posting a DnD story here. I'm not sure how long I can make these but I just think this was funny and so far has been a highlight of my relatively short DnD career.
So I was DMing a 1 on 1 game a few months ago with the premise of the PC and a bunch of people getting isekaid into this fantasy world and accidentally taking over the bodies of people in the forgotten realms. One by one at seemingly random times throughout the month, a random person from our world would die horribly to get forcibly borrow the body of a fantasy character. And coincidentally, the PC was thrown into the body of an elven woman with a missing older brother, Eize, who apparently got a reputation after his disappearance. And PC believes that guy might have some clue how to get back home and plus the girl she's accidentally taken the body of, Luna, is now in her head and wants PC to carry out her task and find him. So both of their paths are set on finding this one guy. Perfect. The whole time, the fact that this elf woman was actually this random human from another world hijacking her body was kept a secret to most characters she came across. Including an NPC party member who I just kind of made to guide her through the basics of DnD.
It was her first time playing so I made the elf she was hijacking have an archer roommate friend who tries to see if she can shoot an arrow well, lift, and other stuff that would translate into different rolls at the start. Turns out the PC really liked him so he tagged along to help her find her missing brother not knowing that the person in control of her body and voice was... someone else entirely. Occasionally, since she's in the body of someone who already has a history with the weapon she's using (A bow. She picked a ranger) we'd just let any exceptionally good rolls be explained by the trained muscle memory of the woman whose body she's possessing kicking in and doing the heavy lifting for the PC. And occasionally, said elf woman would appear in her head for commentary, ideas, brief explanations and just another outlook on whats happening. Sometimes even throwing in a random wisdom save for select moments to see if the elf would momentarily take over. Small things like when PC is trying to get drunk, a failed random wisdom save would make the normally lightweight elf refuse to lift that mug to her lips for a brief moment. Or in another scenario when she successfully rescued tutorial NPC from being captured (which is a... whole other story), a failed random wisdom save made PC lunge forward and wrap him in a hug since the actual elf has known him for a long time so naturally she'd want to hug him. Just to remind that these were people with their own lives before they were bodyjacked. But these were just very fleeting moments of free will... fun for flavor though!
But anyways after meeting another isekaid soul who's using his host's magical powers as a means to steal and be a pretty shady dude, PC and Luna get a little tip that the guy isn't on the same plane thanks to a magic map that can track anyone in the world. PC used it on herself and someone she met but couldnt find the one they were after. So where to go next but PC a school of mages that can take her to other planes via a staff they have made specifically for this. But in exchange she has to jot down anything she can find to help them document the creatures since one of the students casted fireball in their library. Its a deal! The downside to this staff was that it needs 24 ingame hours to recharge so she has to make sure she knows where shes going. But... she doesnt. And theres like 16 planes in DnD.
So she guesses! And after a little bit of body horror explaining how the staff melts and sucks the PC into itself before teleporting to the other plane and spitting her out, the PC's sent to an area where only what is directly in front of her is visible. If its a little in her peripheral, it'll just disappear into a void. The main reason for this was because I got bored or lost trying to study what the actual planes are like and just kinda made something up for one of them. But after looking around what was basically a desolate landscape with a few abandoned towns, she finds this tall.... thing just kinda standing in a grassy field looking off somewhere. So of course, she decides now is as good time as any to draw the big fella. Was her first time drawing anything ingame. Nat 20. Turns out the person she took the body of is a Davinci-level artist and she didnt even know it and every single art PC wants to draw after this was an automatic masterpiece
But then, when she turns around to at least look for a resting point, theres something off. Roll perception: passed! Something following her.
Due to the nature of this area, she cant tell exactly what or who unless shes looking directly at it so she cant even sneak a glance over her shoulder. So she turns. Dex check: failed. Nothing.
Instead, her one and only party member NPC pointed behind her. And what she sees is the man of the hour; a big tall creature arching its freakishly long neck and spine downwards to get a better look at her with a huge array of masks with different expressions lining his back and somehow staring right at her. And on its face was a joyous mask described as being akin to one of those old tragedy/comedy plays.
PC asks "who... what are you."
And this is where I finally got to cement the name and the creature answers, "I am Gay... Though, this word has a varying meaning though does it not? Call me Happy."
We did not call them Happy. Because me and the PC were both 12 at heart and Gay is just funnier. So Gay is a Aasfaraaba, creatures who are basically just named an emotion so legally, by the books own admission, I can name a character in the most serious context, Gay. He's Gay. And that just makes me smile.
And despite the PC trying to keep the fact that she's hijacked someones body and the fact that the real elf is kind of just a bystander in her own mind a secret, the first thing Gay does is stare directly at the PC and ask "why are there two of you" completely ignoring the NPC party member and nudging forward the idea that Gay can see both people inside her. And no im not rephrasing that because I dont know how to for this one. Gay gives her some information on where the guy she's looking for is while politely says that Eize and his "parasite" are in a different plane entirely called Baator. Frankly, what else could you call these isekaid bodysnatches if not parasites? And as the creature explains this, the joy mask switched seamlessly to a different one with the only real sign its not just the mask physically changing was the discarded expression suddenly being in their hand. With more being added the more the conversation went on and the expressions had to change.
Despite Gay being a weird eldritch creature, me and the other player loved the dude and the fact that fact that their presence meant i could seamlessly make gay puns. Turns out the dude just like to come here to listen to the stories of lost souls that find their way to this place. And that they just like the weird phenomena like chocolate rain appearing at a certain time and shows off how magic simply touching the air makes a bunch of weird and random effects like summoning a simple ball of light and watching as it slowly morphs into pink strawberry icecream. Dude was just here for fun and noticed these people who dont belong here.
And after a short interaction, Gay said they didnt want to miss the chocolate rain starting soon and asked if PC had any other questions. The NPC party member is freaking out still and the actual elf woman forced as a bystander is weirded out but PC really likes him and says "I like him! Her? Um… do you have a gender by chance we can call you by?" Gay's response?
"What is that?"
Gay was just Gay. And Gay had no gender.
And that was it. A character made from a monster i thought was cool and a joke i thought was funny that quickly became a favorite among me and the player despite the dude not even showing up much. He did appear another time much later after this when she went to a different plane, Baator, which to my knowledge is basically Hell. And Gay was just kinda sitting by a river of blood and rapidly moving, outstretched arms. PC runs over to the mask enthusiast screaming, "Hey! Gay!" which of course got a nice out of game chuckle cause we are once again both 12 mentally, and this dude pulls out a mask with a guy cupping his chin and says "do I know you" And after a short awkward shift in tone with PC thinking she was racist thinking all weirdly tall mask collectors were the same person, Gay cackles, swaps to a mask of wild laughter, and says "Did you appreciate my joke?"
Turns out PC caught Gay sitting by a river of souls, stating they find it "relaxing." And proceeds to turn a piece of one of their shattered masks into a beach ball that gets tossed around by the flailing souls being whisked away. Gay gives her a hint, light plane lore, and directions on where to go when asked at this point, Gay was just the PCs very hands off guide when she goes to other planes so as to give her SOME kind of hint as to which direction her main goal is. But mostly sticking to a few random spots far away and immediately leaving to do whatever they came here for in the first place after a bit of talking.
And the FINAL of the three Gay events happened when PC finally found the elf's brother and bested him in an incredibly close boss fight with a very confused party member. Turns out the one hijacking Eize was body to- somehow successfully gain a pact with nearly every demon including Glasya, who in DnD lore, I think? is a big deal since shes the daughter of the big boss of DnD Satan. And the PC isnt fond of Eize's "parasite" using his body for evil. PC is upset. The elf whos watching her brother being puppetered like this, is upset. And the NPC is completely clueless as he lacks the context of wtf they're both talking about.
But loyal to the end, NPC helps his friend beat up her suddenly evil brother and with just a bit of health left, she tries to teleport them back home...? Back... to the normal DnD plane. i don't know what its called. But she forgot to bring Eize and the NPC tutorial friend. The guy she spent all this time trying to get and several irl months trying to find. Because all creatures need to touch the staff to teleport to a new plane and she thought that simply holding hands with someone else would drag them along. It didnt. So now she has to wait several in game hours while her ally is in literal Hell with the enemy while she has a measly 2 hit points left after the battle. So she goes back to the wizards who give her a health potion and casts a plane spell. I dont remember if thats a thing they can do but i did mention they could do it once months ago so PC just asked them to just teleport her there.
With limited time and limited health, she's spawned right back to where she did before in Baator with Gay still just chilling by the river of souls. PC desperately asks Gay to take her to Glasya's castle where Eize and her friend are still probably laid out. Gay just looks at her and says "...You're still here?"
And so engages an attempt to persuade Gay to help.... and it fails. Because I, in my brief and probably flawed readings, understood devils in DnD to be really into the idea of only helping IF you have something to offer, Gay says, "I must obey the rules of this plane, and that requires me to only help you in return of something of value. However there is nothing of value you have for me. So I cannot aid."
She tries again, saying that if she doesn't get to her brother soon, they could start a massive war against the other planes. Which... didnt need a roll. Aasfaraabas dont really give a hoot about any of that. So that one just automatically failed. "Oh, my sweet girls. The safety or conquer of the planes does not concern my kind." Didnt work either.
So in a huff PC was about to just leave. Then one more idea comes to mind. In the form of the elf shes hijacking asking her to trade knowledge about PCs non-fantasy homeworld. A persuasion roll here and it actually works!
So Gay yells something in another language and just stops time so they can hear her story. For Gay has Wish. Any spell is theirs to use including the one to stop time. "Very well. If you wouldn't mind, I will take my payment now." So they sit down and after telling Gay all about her own world with bikes, trains, cars, and a bunch of technology, And so Gay is content and simply snaps her around the proper location she needs to be. Not the exact area since theres no way to know exactly where to put her but Gay had a general idea and made the trek significantly shorter.
And that was it. Thats the final appearance of the most powerful random NPC i've ever created who just so happens to be a favorite among me and the player AND a very fun character to write. Half of the time, the descriptions of what the guy were just vague and confused as though I, the DM, didnt know what to call him. Saying things like "the tall.... thing stared down at you." "The masked.... thing" The word Aasfaraaba was foreign to the player since i didnt tell her. It was her first game and I wanted things to be naturally told via the game and the species name was never brought up in Gay's 3 whole appearances. Gay was just Gay. It became a little joke that "Gay was just Gay" The other player didnt want to know what Gay was. Didnt need to know Gay's gender. Gay was just Gay.

I’ve never, ever, in my whole life, high school crushed so hard on a person that all I can see is him and only him in my future. I also realize I’m a romantic who reads a lot into things and is a class act over-thinker. My idiotic lady lizard brain attached to a single moment that changed our dynamic in my head, and I’m frustrated with myself because… I shouldn’t have a crush on him. Like, really, I should not be pining after him, but I am, and I’m at this point in life where I’m okay not dating anyone because I highly doubt I’d ever feel with anyone else how I feel when he looks at me. His eyes are ingrained into my memory; each little moment between us, as tiny as they are, simmers in my mind and sweetly torments me in my dreams as we hold each other and talk about everything. I need genuine human contact/connection, obviously. I can’t explain it, but god, can I feel it; things become slow, and nothing else exists. It took one hug. I excitedly threw my arms around his neck for him being home, and he wrapped his arms around my waist. And with my chest pressed against his, I felt it; I felt my brain and my heart ping something just as the butterflies took flight, and it took forever for me to realize I messed up and fell a little into feelings with him. Which I am sure is one-sided. It’s going on a year and a half of being in “crush” with him, and it’s so incredibly stupid of me, but I can’t get these little moments out of my head; he lives there rent-free.

• His warm smile and sparkling eyes from between airplane seats as I get excited over flying.
  
• Him quietly teasing me over little things like how I basically live at their house or if I’m acting like a dork, but it’s just between us.
  
• A rather peculiar look he gave me as we were digging a giant hole in the sand so we could help bury his brother and a friend in it.
  
• Him offering me a single cheese curd by holding one out to me via the old finger pinch.
  
• He knows the little things I like and will point them out, like, “They have cappuccino ice cream.” Or, “You like ____, you’ll like this show.” Which isn’t such a big thing, but for me, it means a lot…
  

From that moment a year and a half ago, that spark between us caused such a shift in me that I’m simply just excited to feel alive again. He saw me. I felt like I met my person, a friend. Like his heart pressed against mine in such an innocent way that it jumpstarted something sleeping inside me, and I’ve been going ever since. I’m working on myself; I’m back in college classes for creative writing, paying off debt, writing almost weekly, making long-term goals, and questioning why I was okay being locked in a cage for so long while someone else held the key. I’m hardcore into therapy, self-help, and traveling on my own. He showed me what it was like to feel safe in someone’s presence. Since then, I have only been moving towards a new reality, one that I’ve been working toward my whole life until someone told me to stop, and it was he who made me realize my potential was being wasted by staying stagnant and that I must continue forward. It was just by him showing me kindness no one had shown me before that I realized I was being abused and being held back from my dreams.
At times, I don’t know if the spark was attraction, an awakening of sorts, or both. Still, I find myself stuck in the middle of both a nightmare and a dream, but I know I’d still be stuck if it wasn’t for him waking me up in the most beautiful of ways and opening my world back up to the technicolor universe I used to play in. I’ve never openly admitted to this crush, but I felt like it was time to let it out so I could breathe: I love him for showing me acceptance, for allowing me my dark humor, and, in turn, for sharing his own. I’m secretly weaving our innocent story into a rom-com, and I’m writing so there will be something of us on some plane of existence. Because I doubt I’ll ever tell him I had such a big crush on him, even though I desperately want to. I want there to be something written to tell him I appreciate him for what he’s secretly helped me accomplish and that I see his soul so clearly, like it were my own. He helped me fall back in love with myself, and I will always love him for this small act of beautiful kindness.

Everything in my inventory is up for trade. The most valuable items are listed here, the rest you can find in My Inventory

Feel free to Add Me or even better send a Trade Offer. Open for any suggestions: upgrades, downgrades / knives, gloves, skins / stickers, patterns, floats.

All Buyouts are listed in cash value.

KNIVES

★ Butterfly Knife Lore (Factory New), B/O: $7194.77

★ Butterfly Knife Autotronic (Minimal Wear), B/O: $2025.74

⎯

★ M9 Bayonet Ultraviolet (Field-Tested), B/O: $557.87

★ M9 Bayonet Stained (Well-Worn), B/O: $529.41

★ M9 Bayonet Boreal Forest (Field-Tested), B/O: $465.39

⎯

★ Talon Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $1295.27

★ Bayonet Tiger Tooth (Minimal Wear), B/O: $746.28

★ Karambit Bright Water (Field-Tested), B/O: $688.15

⎯

★ Flip Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $547.93

★ Flip Knife Autotronic (Minimal Wear), B/O: $476.69

★ Flip Knife Case Hardened (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $278.18

★ Flip Knife Black Laminate (Well-Worn), B/O: $258.83

★ Flip Knife Urban Masked (Field-Tested), B/O: $181.64

⎯

★ Stiletto Knife Marble Fade (Factory New), B/O: $686.04

★ Stiletto Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $665.41

★ Stiletto Knife, B/O: $601.39

★ Stiletto Knife Crimson Web (Field-Tested), B/O: $418.25

★ Stiletto Knife Night Stripe (Field-Tested), B/O: $227.80

★ Stiletto Knife Boreal Forest (Field-Tested), B/O: $194.96

★ Stiletto Knife Safari Mesh (Field-Tested), B/O: $192.79

⎯

★ Nomad Knife Crimson Web (Field-Tested), B/O: $518.11

★ Nomad Knife Scorched (Field-Tested), B/O: $169.78

★ Nomad Knife Forest DDPAT (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $166.88

★ StatTrak™ Nomad Knife Blue Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $335.79

⎯

★ Skeleton Knife Stained (Well-Worn), B/O: $442.05

★ Skeleton Knife Urban Masked (Minimal Wear), B/O: $426.24

★ Skeleton Knife Boreal Forest (Field-Tested), B/O: $314.03

★ StatTrak™ Skeleton Knife Fade (Minimal Wear), B/O: $2361.28

★ StatTrak™ Skeleton Knife Urban Masked (Field-Tested), B/O: $376.53

⎯

★ Ursus Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $557.12

★ Ursus Knife, B/O: $471.42

★ Ursus Knife Blue Steel (Minimal Wear), B/O: $212.37

★ Ursus Knife Case Hardened (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $187.66

★ Ursus Knife Damascus Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $178.18

★ Ursus Knife Ultraviolet (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $155.13

★ Ursus Knife Boreal Forest (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $124.26

⎯

★ Huntsman Knife Black Laminate (Minimal Wear), B/O: $204.83

★ Huntsman Knife Black Laminate (Field-Tested), B/O: $184.50

★ StatTrak™ Huntsman Knife Lore (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $224.11

⎯

★ Bowie Knife Gamma Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $2142.02

★ Bowie Knife, B/O: $230.44

★ Bowie Knife Damascus Steel (Factory New), B/O: $209.20

★ Bowie Knife Ultraviolet (Minimal Wear), B/O: $180.51

★ Bowie Knife Ultraviolet (Field-Tested), B/O: $131.03

⎯

★ Falchion Knife Night (Field-Tested), B/O: $132.54

★ Falchion Knife Urban Masked (Well-Worn), B/O: $112.81

★ Falchion Knife Scorched (Field-Tested), B/O: $108.81

★ Falchion Knife Forest DDPAT (Field-Tested), B/O: $107.82

★ Falchion Knife Safari Mesh (Field-Tested), B/O: $107.46

★ StatTrak™ Falchion Knife Ultraviolet (Field-Tested), B/O: $143.08

⎯

★ Paracord Knife Crimson Web (Minimal Wear), B/O: $486.48

★ Paracord Knife Blue Steel (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $163.12

⎯

★ Survival Knife Blue Steel (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $138.26

★ Survival Knife Night Stripe (Field-Tested), B/O: $131.03

⎯

★ Gut Knife Sapphire (Minimal Wear), B/O: $1127.79

★ Gut Knife Gamma Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $286.17

★ Gut Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $246.55

★ Gut Knife Marble Fade (Factory New), B/O: $240.77

★ Gut Knife, B/O: $210.49

★ Gut Knife Lore (Field-Tested), B/O: $194.22

★ Gut Knife Case Hardened (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $151.51

★ Gut Knife Blue Steel (Minimal Wear), B/O: $124.94

★ Gut Knife Rust Coat (Well-Worn), B/O: $118.99

★ Gut Knife Boreal Forest (Minimal Wear), B/O: $109.80

★ StatTrak™ Gut Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $237.96

⎯

★ Shadow Daggers Gamma Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $264.92

★ Shadow Daggers Marble Fade (Factory New), B/O: $253.03

★ Shadow Daggers Tiger Tooth (Factory New), B/O: $237.22

★ Shadow Daggers Crimson Web (Field-Tested), B/O: $153.40

★ Shadow Daggers Autotronic (Minimal Wear), B/O: $144.42

★ Shadow Daggers Blue Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $105.20

★ StatTrak™ Shadow Daggers Damascus Steel (Minimal Wear), B/O: $150.46

⎯

★ Navaja Knife Fade (Factory New), B/O: $365.99

★ Navaja Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $228.93

★ Navaja Knife Marble Fade (Factory New), B/O: $227.43

★ Navaja Knife Slaughter (Factory New), B/O: $209.06

★ Navaja Knife, B/O: $203.16

★ Navaja Knife Case Hardened (Well-Worn), B/O: $132.57

★ Navaja Knife Damascus Steel (Factory New), B/O: $121.69

★ Navaja Knife Damascus Steel (Minimal Wear), B/O: $109.95

★ Navaja Knife Damascus Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $100.41

★ StatTrak™ Navaja Knife Fade (Factory New), B/O: $369.01

★ StatTrak™ Navaja Knife Damascus Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $109.95

GLOVES

★ Sport Gloves Amphibious (Minimal Wear), B/O: $2394.67

★ Sport Gloves Omega (Well-Worn), B/O: $572.33

★ Sport Gloves Bronze Morph (Minimal Wear), B/O: $338.88

★ Sport Gloves Big Game (Field-Tested), B/O: $323.66

⎯

★ Specialist Gloves Marble Fade (Minimal Wear), B/O: $1652.07

★ Specialist Gloves Tiger Strike (Field-Tested), B/O: $599.14

★ Specialist Gloves Crimson Web (Well-Worn), B/O: $231.57

★ Specialist Gloves Buckshot (Minimal Wear), B/O: $126.21

⎯

★ Moto Gloves POW! (Minimal Wear), B/O: $996.99

★ Moto Gloves POW! (Field-Tested), B/O: $383.31

★ Moto Gloves POW! (Well-Worn), B/O: $276.00

★ Moto Gloves Turtle (Field-Tested), B/O: $180.28

⎯

★ Hand Wraps CAUTION! (Minimal Wear), B/O: $502.29

★ Hand Wraps Giraffe (Minimal Wear), B/O: $180.73

★ Hand Wraps CAUTION! (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $178.32

⎯

★ Driver Gloves Queen Jaguar (Minimal Wear), B/O: $181.01

★ Driver Gloves Rezan the Red (Field-Tested), B/O: $101.66

⎯

★ Broken Fang Gloves Jade (Field-Tested), B/O: $127.88

★ Broken Fang Gloves Needle Point (Minimal Wear), B/O: $124.55

⎯

★ Bloodhound Gloves Guerrilla (Minimal Wear), B/O: $127.94

★ Hydra Gloves Case Hardened (Field-Tested), B/O: $102.55

WEAPONS

AK-47 X-Ray (Well-Worn), B/O: $478.95

AUG Hot Rod (Factory New), B/O: $425.83

StatTrak™ M4A1-S Hyper Beast (Factory New), B/O: $413.95

M4A4 Daybreak (Factory New), B/O: $309.51

StatTrak™ AK-47 Aquamarine Revenge (Factory New), B/O: $305.43

AK-47 Case Hardened (Well-Worn), B/O: $196.38

StatTrak™ M4A4 Temukau (Minimal Wear), B/O: $174.64

P90 Run and Hide (Field-Tested), B/O: $167.03

AWP Asiimov (Field-Tested), B/O: $153.33

Souvenir SSG 08 Death Strike (Minimal Wear), B/O: $140.00

M4A1-S Printstream (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $124.70

StatTrak™ M4A1-S Golden Coil (Field-Tested), B/O: $117.48

AWP Asiimov (Well-Worn), B/O: $115.97

StatTrak™ Desert Eagle Printstream (Minimal Wear), B/O: $112.96

StatTrak™ AK-47 Asiimov (Minimal Wear), B/O: $110.85

Souvenir M4A1-S Master Piece (Well-Worn), B/O: $102.42

AK-47 Bloodsport (Minimal Wear), B/O: $100.53

Trade Offer Link - Steam Profile Link - My Inventory

Knives - Bowie Knife, Butterfly Knife, Falchion Knife, Flip Knife, Gut Knife, Huntsman Knife, M9 Bayonet, Bayonet, Karambit, Shadow Daggers, Stiletto Knife, Ursus Knife, Navaja Knife, Talon Knife, Classic Knife, Paracord Knife, Survival Knife, Nomad Knife, Skeleton Knife, Patterns - Gamma Doppler, Doppler (Phase 1, Phase 2, Phase 3, Phase 4, Black Pearl, Sapphire, Ruby, Emerald), Crimson Web, Lore, Fade, Ultraviolet, Night, Marble Fade (Fire & Ice, Fake FI), Case Hardened (Blue Gem), Autotronic, Slaughter, Black Laminate, Tiger Tooth, Boreal Forest, Scorched, Blue Steel, Vanilla, Damascus Steel, Forest DDPAT, Urban Masked, Freehand, Stained, Bright Water, Safari Mesh, Rust Coat, Gloves - Bloodhound Gloves (Charred, Snakebite, Guerrilla, Bronzed), Driver Gloves (Snow Leopard, King Snake, Crimson Weave, Imperial Plaid, Black Tie, Lunar Weave, Diamondback, Rezan the Red, Overtake, Queen Jaguar, Convoy, Racing Green), Hand Wraps (Cobalt Skulls, CAUTION!, Overprint, Slaughter, Leather, Giraffe, Badlands, Spruce DDPAT, Arboreal, Constrictor, Desert Shamagh, Duct Tape), Moto Gloves (Spearmint, POW!, Cool Mint, Smoke Out, Finish Line, Polygon, Blood Pressure, Turtle, Boom!, Eclipse, 3rd Commando Company, Transport), Specialist Gloves (Crimson Kimono, Tiger Strike, Emerald Web, Field Agent, Marble Fade, Fade, Foundation, Lt. Commander, Crimson Web, Mogul, Forest DDPAT, Buckshot), Sport Gloves (Pandora's Box, Superconductor, Hedge Maze, Vice, Amphibious, Slingshot, Omega, Arid, Big Game, Nocts, Scarlet Shamagh, Bronze Morph), Hydra Gloves (Case Hardened, Emerald, Rattler, Mangrove), Broken Fang Gloves (Jade, Yellow-banded, Unhinged, Needle Point), Pistols - P2000 (Wicked Sick, Ocean Foam, Fire Element, Amber Fade, Corticera, Chainmail, Imperial Dragon, Obsidian, Scorpion, Handgun, Acid Etched), USP-S (Printstream, Kill Confirmed, Whiteout, Road Rash, Owergrowth, The Traitor, Neo-Noir, Dark Water, Orion, Blueprint, Stainless, Caiman, Serum, Monster Mashup, Royal Blue, Ancient Visions, Cortex, Orange Anolis, Ticket To Hell, Black Lotus, Cyrex, Check Engine, Guardian, Purple DDPAT, Torque, Blood Tiger, Flashback, Business Class, Pathfinder, Para Green), Lead Conduit, Glock-18 (Ramese's Reach, Umbral Rabbit, Fade, Candy Apple, Bullet Queen, Synth Leaf, Neo-Noir, Nuclear Garden, Dragon Tatto, Reactor, Pink DDPAT, Twilight Galaxy, Sand Dune, Groundwater, Blue Fissure, Snack Attack, Water Elemental, Brass, Wasteland Rebel, Vogue, Franklin, Royal Legion, Gamma Doppler, Weasel, Steel Disruption, Ironwork, Grinder, High Beam, Moonrise, Oxide Blaze, Bunsen Burner, Clear Polymer, Bunsen Burner, Night), P250 (Apep's Curse, Re.built, Nuclear Threat, Modern Hunter, Splash, Whiteout, Vino Primo, Mehndi, Asiimov, Visions, Undertow, Cartel, See Ya Later, Gunsmoke, Splash, Digital Architect, Muertos, Red Rock, Bengal Tiger, Crimson Kimono, Wingshot, Metallic DDPAT, Hive, Dark Filigree, Mint Kimono), Five-Seven (Neon Kimono, Berries And Cherries, Fall Hazard, Crimson Blossom, Hyper Beast, Nitro, Fairy Tale, Case Hardened, Copper Galaxy, Angry Mob, Monkey Business, Fowl Play, Anodized Gunmetal, Hot Shot, Retrobution, Boost Protocol), CZ75-Auto (Chalice, Crimson Web, Emerald Quartz, The Fuschia is Now, Nitro, Xiangliu, Yellow Jacket, Victoria, Poison Dart, Syndicate, Eco, Hexane, Pole, Tigris), Tec-9 (Mummy's Rot, Rebel, Terrace, Nuclear Threat, Hades, Rust Leaf, Decimator, Blast From, Orange Murano, Toxic, Fuel Injector, Remote Control, Bamboo Forest, Isaac, Avalanche, Brother, Re-Entry, Blue Titanium, Bamboozle), R8 Revolver (Banana Cannon, Fade, Blaze, Crimson Web, Liama Cannon, Crazy 8, Reboot, Canal Spray, Night, Amber Fade), Desert Eagle (Blaze, Hand Cannon, Fennec Fox, Sunset Storm, Emerald Jörmungandr, Pilot, Hypnotic, Golden Koi, Printstream, Cobalt Disruption, Code Red, Ocean Drive, Midnight Storm, Kumicho Dragon, Crimson Web, Heirloom, Night Heist, Mecha Industries, Night, Conspiracy, Trigger Discipline, Naga, Directive, Light Rail), Dual Berettas (Flora Carnivora, Duelist, Cobra Strike, Black Limba, Emerald, Hemoglobin, Twin Turbo, Marina, Melondrama, Pyre, Retribution, Briar, Dezastre, Royal Consorts, Urban Shock, Dualing Dragons, Panther, Balance), Rifles - Galil (Aqua Terrace, Winter Forest, Chatterbox, Sugar Rush, Pheonix Blacklight, CAUTION!, Orange DDPAT, Cerberus, Dusk Ruins, Eco, Chromatic Aberration, Stone Cold, Tuxedo, Sandstorm, Shattered, Urban Rubble, Rocket Pop, Kami, Crimson Tsunami, Connexion), SCAR-20 (Fragments, Brass, Cyrex, Palm, Splash Jam, Cardiac, Emerald, Crimson Web, Magna Carta, Stone Mosaico, Bloodsport, Enforcer), AWP (Black Nile, Duality, Gungnir, Dragon Lore, Prince, Medusa, Desert Hydra, Fade, Lightning Strike, Oni Taiji, Silk Tiger, Graphite, Chromatic Aberration, Asiimov, Snake Camo, Boom, Containment Breach, Wildfire, Redline, Electric Hive, Hyper Beast, Neo-Noir, Man-o'-war, Pink DDPAT, Corticera, Sun in Leo, Elite Build, Fever Dream, Atheris, Mortis, PAW, Exoskeleton, Worm God, POP AWP, Phobos, Acheron, Pit Viper, Capillary, Safari Mesh), AK-47 (Steel Delta, Head Shot, Wild Lotus, Gold Arabesque, X-Ray, Fire Serpent, Hydroponic, Panthera Onca, Case Hardened, Vulcan, Jet Set, Fuel Injector, Bloodsport, Nightwish, First Class, Neon Rider, Asiimov, Red Laminate, Aquamarine Revenge, The Empress, Wasteland Rebel, Jaguar, Black Laminate, Leet Museo, Neon Revolution, Redline, Frontside Misty, Predator, Legion of Anubis, Point Disarray, Orbit Mk01, Blue Laminate, Green Laminate, Emerald Pinstripe, Cartel, Phantom Disruptor, Jungle Spray, Safety Net, Rat Rod, Baroque Purple, Slate, Elite Build, Uncharted, Safari Mesh), FAMAS (Waters of Nephthys, Sundown, Prime Conspiracy, Afterimage, Commemoration, Dark Water, Spitfire, Pulse, Eye of Athena, Meltdown, Rapid Eye Move, Roll Cage, Styx, Mecha Industrie, Djinn, ZX Spectron, Valence, Neural Net, Night Borre, Hexne), M4A4 (Eye of Horus, Temukau, Howl, Poseidon, Asiimov, Daybreak, Hellfire, Zirka, Red DDPAT, Radiation Hazard, Modern Hunter, The Emperor, The Coalition, Bullet Rain, Cyber Security, X-Ray, Dark Blossom, Buzz Kill, In Living Color, Neo-Noir, Desolate Space, 龍王 (Dragon King), Royal Paladin, The Battlestar, Global Offensive, Tooth Fairy, Desert-Strike, Griffin, Evil Daimyo, Spider Lily, Converter), M4A1-S (Emphorosaur-S, Welcome to the Jungle, Imminent Danger, Knight, Hot Rod, Icarus Fell, Blue Phosphor, Printstream, Master Piece, Dark Water, Golden Coil, Bright Water, Player Two, Atomic Alloy, Guardian, Chantico's Fire, Hyper Beast, Mecha Industries, Cyrex, Control Panel, Moss Quartz, Nightmare, Decimator, Leaded Glass, Basilisk, Blood Tiger, Briefing, Night Terror, Nitro, VariCamo, Flashback), SG 553 (Cyberforce, Hazard Pay, Bulldozer, Integrale, Dragon Tech, Ultraviolet, Colony IV, Hypnotic, Cyrex, Candy Apple, Barricade, Pulse), SSG 08 (Death Strike, Sea Calico, Blood in the Water, Orange Filigree, Dragonfire, Big Iron, Bloodshot, Detour, Turbo Peek, Red Stone), AUG (Akihabara Accept, Flame Jörmungandr, Hot Rod, Midnight Lily, Sand Storm, Carved Jade, Wings, Anodized Navy, Death by Puppy, Torque, Bengal Tiger, Chameleon, Fleet Flock, Random Access, Momentum, Syd Mead, Stymphalian, Arctic Wolf, Aristocrat, Navy Murano), G3SG1 (Chronos, Violet Murano, Flux, Demeter, Orange Kimono, The Executioner, Green Apple, Arctic Polar Camo, Contractor), SMGs - P90 (ScaraB Rush, Neoqueen, Astral Jörmungandr, Run and Hide, Emerald Dragon, Cold Blooded, Death by Kitty, Baroque Red, Vent Rush, Blind Spot, Asiimov, Trigon, Sunset Lily, Death Grip, Leather, Nostalgia, Fallout Warning, Tiger Pit, Schermatic, Virus, Shapewood, Glacier Mesh, Shallow Grave, Chopper, Desert Warfare), MAC-10 (Sakkaku, Hot Snakes, Copper Borre, Red Filigree, Gold Brick, Graven, Case Hardened, Stalker, Amber Fade, Neon Rider, Tatter, Curse, Propaganda, Nuclear Garden, Disco Tech, Toybox, Heat, Indigo), UMP-45 (Wild Child, Fade, Blaze, Day Lily, Minotaur's Labyrinth, Crime Scene, Caramel, Bone Pile, Momentum, Primal Saber), MP7 (Teal Blossom, Fade, Nemesis, Whiteout, Asterion, Bloosport, Abyssal Apparition, Full Stop, Special Delivery, Neon Ply, Asterion, Ocean Foam, Powercore, Scorched, Impire), PP-Bizon (Modern Hunter, Rust Coat, Forest Leaves, Antique, High Roller, Blue Streak, Seabird, Judgement of Anubis, Bamboo Print, Embargo, Chemical Green, Coblat Halftone, Fuel Rod, Photic Zone, Irradiated Alert, Carbon Fiber), MP9 (Featherweight, Wild Lily, Pandora's Box, Stained Glass, Bulldozer, Dark Age, Hot Rod, Hypnotic, Hydra, Rose Iron, Music Box, Setting Sun, Food Chain, Airlock, Mount Fuji, Starlight Protector, Ruby Poison Dart, Deadly Poison), MP5-SD (Liquidation, Oxide Oasis, Phosphor, Nitro, Agent, Autumn Twilly), Shotguns, Machineguns - Sawed-Off (Kiss♥Love, First Class, Orange DDPAT, Rust Coat, The Kraken, Devourer, Mosaico, Wasteland Princess, Bamboo Shadow, Copper, Serenity, Limelight, Apocalypto), XM1014 (Frost Borre, Ancient Lore, Red Leather, Elegant Vines, Banana Leaf, Jungle, Urban Perforated, Grassland, Blaze Orange, Heaven Guard, VariCamo Blue, Entombed, XOXO, Seasons, Tranquility, Bone Machine, Incinegator, Teclu Burner, Black Tie, Zombie Offensive, Watchdog), Nova (Sobek's Bite, Baroque Orange, Hyper Beast, Green Apple, Antique, Modern Hunter, Walnut, Forest Leaves, Graphite, Blaze Orange, Rising Skull, Tempest, Bloomstick, Interlock, Quick Sand, Moon in Libra, Clean Polymer, Red Quartz, Toy Soldier), MAG-7 (Copper Coated, Insomnia, Cinqueda, Counter Terrace, Prism Terrace, Memento, Chainmail, Hazard, Justice, Bulldozer, Silver, Core Breach, Firestarter, Praetorian, Heat, Hard Water, Monster Call, BI83 Spectrum, SWAG-7), M249 (Humidor, Shipping Forecast, Blizzard Marbleized, Downtown, Jungle DDPAT, Nebula Crusader, Impact Drill, Emerald Poison Dart), Negev (Mjölnir, Anodized Navy, Palm, Power Loader, Bratatat, CaliCamo, Phoenix Stencil, Infrastructure, Boroque Sand), Wear - Factory New (FN), Minimal Wear (MW), Field-Tested (FT), Well-Worn (WW), Battle-Scarred (BS), Stickers Holo/Foil/Gold - Katowice 2014, Krakow 2017, Howling Dawn, Katowice 2015, Crown, London 2018, Cologne 2014, Boston 2018, Atlanta 2017, Cluj-Napoca 2015, DreamHack 2014, King on the Field, Harp of War, Winged Difuser, Cologne 2016, Cologne 2015, MLG Columbus 2016, Katowice 2019, Berlin 2019, RMR 2020, Stockholm 2021, Antwerp 2022, Paris 2023, Swag Foil, Flammable foil, Others - Souvenirs, Agents, Pins, Passes, Gifts, Music Kits, Cases, Keys, Capsules, Packages, Patches

Some items on the list may no longer be available or are still locked, visit My Inventory for more details.

Send a Trade Offer for fastest response. I consider all offers.

Add me for discuss if there is a serious offer that needs to be discussed.

This is my second time being divorced after a relatively short marriage. The first time was one year into a marriage that was part of a 6 year relationship. This most recent one was less than a year into a marriage that was part of a 3 year relationship. I'm 35M, no kids for context. Both divorces were relatively straightforward but I'm solo on a mortgage now.
It's embarrassing to tell friends and family about the second marriage ending and I haven't shared with coworkers. Last year I worked on stabilizing finances and was working two jobs. I received a promotion at my main one and have stopped the other one.
It's been a little over a year at this point since the divorce and I'm struggling with what to do now. I haven't dated at all over the past year and half. I'm having trouble with wanting to date again and I'm not sure I want to get married again. Divorce is somewhat common in my family with my parents divorcing early on in my childhood. I lost my brother about halfway through the first relationship and I had initially thought that and family history contributed to things not working out. This second relationship leading to marriage took place entirely during covid.
I'd like to believe that hard circumstances and family history contributed to my situation in these cases. My first marriage I thought failed due to mostly circumstances, my lack of experience, and incompatibility. With the second divorce, I'm beginning to wonder if something is wrong with my approach or my lifestyle or beliefs that is contributing to things not working out.
My key goals at this time are working on being in a place mentally and socially where I feel comfortable. I started therapy again after a month off of it. On paper my life is financially and socially better than a year ago. I still feel kinda lost though. Have others felt this way? If so what did you do about that and how has it worked for you?

Hello, I come in somewhat desperate need of help when it comes to my relationship. Some things have come up that have legitimately started making me question my relationship with my GF of ~3 months.
This comes from a throwaway account, so I'll refer to myself as Shelly, and I'll refer to my GF as Phoneix.
A bit of backround first:
I'm 16 and a half, and I'd describe this as my first "real relationship", I do have Aspergers, so it kinda makes it hard to properly communicate my feelings towards anything, but I don't hold these feelings in either. I'm kind of a nerd when it comes to school and I achieve the highest grades I can, as I was a sophomore last school year (now technically a junior, due to the end of the 23-24 school year). I strive to be successful in my future. I had just moved to a new town where I still reside (I moved in August).
As for my girlfriend, (like I've said, I'll refer to her as Phoenix), she's recently turned fifteen in February. She, unlike me, does not have any conditions that could hinder anything in her life. She is a bit shy when it comes to talking with new people, she also strives to be successful, but hasn't been receiving the best of grades in her ninth grade year (as of now, shes technically a sophomore because of ghe end of the 23-24 school year). She's been in this town all of her life.
As per how we met... We had a class together in the 23-24 school year, it was Theatre-Art Studies, but we didn't actually meet until we were about 3 weeks into the class. Eventually, we met as we were assigned a project about emotions in the class (which was a one on one project), she seemed reluctant to talk to me at first, but as we progressed throughout the project, she seemed more eager to speak with me.
We actually had a funny conversation about each of our families, and she then thought I was a senior, when I also thought she was a junior (because she's really tall, I assumed she was a junior). We cleared it up, and when she found out I was a sophomore, she kinda smiled and told me "You're cute for a sophomore", which completely gave me a shock. (This is because I would never think a girl would call me cute or anything). All I could really say was a simple "thank you", and I told her how shocked I was hearing that. We had been talking so long at that point we realized there was about 5 minutes kept of the class (there's about 41 minutes in each class, and we started five minutes in class). So we rushed the project and turned it in to be looked at the next day.
The next day, I asked if I can sit a seat behind her, Phoenix said it was fine and she exclaimed how much of a nice conversation she had with me and said "I thought I'd never had a good conversation with a boy again, but you proved me wrong". (This will be examined later, as I've had no knowledge of her past at the time). I questioned her on it and explained that it wasn't something that needed to be talked about.
Over the next week, we got more close with each other, and on a Thursday, we were assigned a project about building a movie set with Legos. Being the planner I am, I wanted to construct a plan with Phoenix (as we chose our own partners aside from being chosen by the teacher, who we'll call Mrs. Ness, she'll be important later). I (very awkwardly) asked her for her phone number, and she accepted, and Phoenix began scribbling her number on a torn piece of paper, she gave it to me, and this is how we started talking out if school.
We passed with flying colors on the project, but anyways...
During March, after we had met over two and a half weeks ago, she wanted to talk to me about something, and she asked me if we could sit and talk in the back of our auditorium (where this class usually was held), and we started talking and she said she's had a crush on me since we met, (In reality, I had also developed feelings for her). She admitted all of this to me and said "I wanted to tell you this, and it's okay if you don't like me for doing this" (something that WILL be brought up later). I said that I didn't hate her for doing that, which she kinda refused to believe, but when I said I had feelings for her too, it looked like a wave of relief hit Phoenix's entire body. So we were sitting there, and she says "A lot of people hate me, especially boys in my grade, but you are one of the few that care about me". To which I said I always strive to treat everyone with trust, equality, and respect.
So... as of that day in early March we began dating! But we kept it secret from anyone else, as we communicated mainly over text, we fell for each other FAST. I found her personality to be sweet, she is a genuine, passionate, and beautiful girl. She finds me dreamy, cute, nice, and respectful. So we have love there
One day Phoenix admitted to me over text (and later on in person) that she had at least 9 breakups since 6th grade, which I felt was strange but I pressed her on the topic, she said that was one of the reasons she disliked boys. I later learned that she had (when we had just met) been suffering through her ninth breakup, and she promised to herself that she'd never date again, that was (as she says) until she met me during that emotions project.
As a person who's had poor experiences with girls in general in the past, I legitimately felt the same way about dating, and I had a back of mind thought of "What If I can't date anyone?".
We had a minor fight in April, but all turned out well in the end, but the way it happened (looking in retrospect) really raises a red flag for me. We were just texting one day when my parents came home and I had forgotten to do the dishes, which they had told me to do, so I went to let Phoenix know that I might be a bit doing chores, she accepted the response. At the same time my parents got home they also brought home groceries, which caused me to take longer than expected, then I got finished with everything.
I hurriedly ran to my room to begin texting her again, she was happy at first, saying she was worried for me, but then began saying "How long you took was sus" (and I'll be completely honest, this was the first time I heard this word, so I didnt know what it meant definition wise), so I asked her what it meant, and she basically reiterated that I was suspicious for being gone that long. I told her that my parents brought in groceries and I had to also do dishes, which was something she didn't believe, as she kept insinuating that I was trying to "keep away from her". Which was not what I had expected. But around thirty minutes later, it was all resolved.
This is one of a few things that make me question the situation I'm in right now...
We began having "spicy" conversations, but not adult-themed conversations, we were essentially saying how much we loved each other and we started talking about kissing, in which she asked "Could we have a kiss?", and me being me, I jumped to saying yes. She says "This could be your first real kiss, Shelly". That just made me excited, then the topic of French Kissing came up, and we were actually going to go through with it, that was until Phoenix's mother looked through her texts and advised Phoenix to "simmer" these conversations down. The next day in person, Phoenix said that her mom did not like me and her exactly being together, (which later changes), but she still gave her permission to talk to me (In reality, this was both of our faults because we got too carried on with a rather passionate conversation).
During our relationship, she had said that her bullies treated her really poorly, and she thought that everyone in her grade disliked her, and even suggested her exes hated her too. She said that her previous ex (I'll call him Max, was a freshman), and her former friend (I'll call her Abby, she was a senior) were her main too aggressors when it came to her bullying. Max was her ex, and Abby (like me, has autism) had a following, and would constantly tease Phoenix to the point of her eating habits being absolutely destroyed. Phoenix said that Max had usually said "I wish your past health issue was bad", and that she was ugly and nobody loved her.
Oh, I forgot to mention that she also had a major health issue in the past, but I would not like to talk about it.
However, on a very hot night in early May, the topic of Phoenix's bullies came up again. It seemed like the usual complaint at first, but she... she kept getting more aggressive over text. It was nearing eleven o'clock at night, and as I had taken a three hour nap that day after school, I was nowhere near tired.
She later went on to say that she'll start a fight with Max, and "win it", which immediately tipped me off that something was wrong, and it rose a large red flag and alarms basically blared in my head (later on, she later also detailed how she would also fight two others as well, both of whom I did not know). The things she said were terrible to hear (I'm a pacifist, and I would EVER only fight in self-defense), I kept telling Phoenix to stop, and to reconsider. (I have text records, and... looking at them now... it's very hard to look at.) I literally begged her to reconsider what she was doing, and she said "I'll win this for you, cutie😈", and after I told her to stop again, she said "I'll only stop after today, and just for you".
I was legitimately scared at this point, and I sought to end the conversation, which ended successfully, but that was when I said "Phoenix, if you continue to go through with this, you are breaking my trust, my morals and values as a person will be broken. I know how to fail your plans, even if I won't get physical". This was my warning to her.
It was around midnight now, and I actually got on a text hotline and reported her behaviour, and provided as many details as I could (I swear, this is making me stressed as I right this now). They ended their report and info collecting at one o'clock, and feeling deathly scared, I tried sleeping. I don't know how I got any sleep that night.
It's the next morning, and Phoenix texts me at around 7:40, saying "Hey cutie, sorry I came in late this morning, but I'm going to for sure win that fight. I'll talk to you later, Shelly". I told her, as a last warning, "Phoenix, please don't do this". That would be my last text for the next thirty minutes.
At around 8:10, I got a text asking "Did you report me?!?!" And I spilled absolutely everything on her. I told her that going through with this, she was breaking my trust and every value I had as a person, and yes, I did indeed report you. I told you I could foil your plan (I was saying this as a reference to my previous text to her that night). She said that she hated me, absolutely hated me.
Okay, look, I was very scared here. I was legitimately scared that she was going to do something to harm me.
This is my lunch period, my fourth period, and I immediately ran in to tell my friends to NOT talk to Phoenix at all costs, and I told them a summary of what happened, they all sympathized with my side of the situation.
Now, I'm very fortunate to have Mrs. Ness as one of the lunch supervisors, so I pulled her off to the side and explained everything to her, I even said that I felt completely unsafe and that I didn't know what she could do to me. She asked if we were "an item", but when she defined it for me, I denied anything relating to the sort, but now I care about being safe, and she said that she would help to protect me at all costs. We were presenting our final projects in the class those next few days, and I asked her if I could sit the closes I could to her while staying far away from Phoenix, she absolutely agreed and promised to have my back. (Thank Jesus).
In class, when she presented that day, I absolutely refused to look at her, and since our tables faced one another in the classroom (we were in a classroom to present these final projects), I felt trapped, I quickly glanced at Phoenix a few times, ans I caught her looking at me. She looked absolutely sullen, and I refused to look at her during her presentation, but instead looked at the ground the entire time while she was presenting, it felt like ages. She was done and I finally felt safe.
After school, I received a text "I don't know if you've blocked me or anything, and I don't know if you hate me. But I'd like to apologize for everything and I want to talk with you in the morning". I reluctantly accepted, and when she came up to my breakfast table in the morning, I still felt scared, but I managed to walk with her to my class, where she would hand me a letter (she knew that I loved her writing, it's still adorable to this day). I read it later on and she said she saw she made a mistake, and that she would like to restart our relationship. I didn't consider ending the relationship there, but it was a stark reminder that I was on the fence about absolutely everything.
I love this girl to death, and in the letter she promised me she wouldn't do anything like this again (which she still keeps to this day), and she said she saw how wrong she was for going as far as she did. I later texted her that I'd take some tike to think about us being together (I was being genuine, and Phoenix accepted)
That Friday, she sent me another text, but with different meaning and wording about the apology and clarified that I did the right thing, and she was in the wrong, and she took fault for that. She just didn't want me to hate her (surprisingly, I wasn't finding myself angry or hateful of her, but rather... deeply disappointed.). I guess that made me decide that I would restart everything with her, and I guess we hit it off again. I felt safe again in her presence, and we resumed our normal routine like nothing had happened. At this point, she was a lot more friendlier towards me than ever before. I let Mrs. Ness know that we had made up and said that she was glad we made up.
Phoenix then invited me to have ice cream at a local parlor, and I'm like "sure, I'll absolutely go". We went on June 1st, which was very convenient as a Saturday and after the last day of school. We were enjoying ourselves, I paid for the ice cream, absolutely everything went well. I even met her mother (at this point I had legitimately forgotten that she once looked through our "spicy" texts), she met my mom and they hit it off well, talking about the town we were originally from, to how our futures would pan out living there, to potential future visits. I legitimately like her mom, she's a sweet lady.
Communication actually became better after this, on a phone call, she demonstrated a sweet French voice, and I called it hot, but she called me sexy, which also shocked me, and I was speechless the entire call. We also started calling each other baby/babe like a few days before. We actually talked more than ever before.
Now, my most latest concern comes on June 8, where I had another "You're sus" incident, this was about our third incident since April, where she accused me of not wanting to play Roblox with her (in reality I was forced by my parents to play a board game with my brothers, which turned out to be fun in the end). She then accused me of hating her, just like her exes, and she accused me of saying that I liked her as a fake confidence boost so I could "later pull her down and destroy her". My mom wanted me to get off her phone for the night (my service on my ohone was shut off June 2nd, so I had to use hers) and I responded "Look, Phoenix, I don't hate you, I love you, and I want you to have a sweet night babe" I don't know if she ever responded to it, since it was quite early (like seven o'clock at night, she usually ends her convos at ten).
Now... now I'm stuck on the fence, and I'm questioning absolutely everything about our relationship. I love this girl to death, and I know her past with this kind of stuff before, but I don't want to be treated the way I am, K don't want to be treated like I'm suspicious, and I don't like the way she puts herself down around me. I absolutely love this girl, I really do, I could say it a million times over and I could still say it some more. I just don't know what to do, can I get some needed advice here?
Thank you for reading this long post, being typed out for about two hours straight in the middle of the night. I hope I can get some outsider perspective on this, because I really need it right now.... thank you!