Anyone else struggled when your company encourages social sharing and posting, which then requires connecting accounts, especially with 3rd parties and apps... that then get leaked or hacked?
Seems like a fine line if there's ever a case of identity theft. Hard to trace where it's not a requirement per se but it's definitely held against you if you're not one of the ones.
Where does accountability begin and end in these scenarios? Seems like with all these data breaches it's about time to prioritize the discussion about digital space, privacy and employee rights and responsibilities.
Kinda thing that needs to be more programmatic, consistent, repeatable and scalabeable. Maybe a framework? Red thread. And maybe some attention to change management? External and unbiased ? ... idk maybe someone out there is working on it.
I have similar thoughts on requiring video, for say meetings, then also having to sign releases etc. And recognizing every birthday and life event? It just begins to blur some lines IMHO.
Ughhh and don't get me started on the power dynamic of colleagues on social!! I mean you can't NOT accept. But it can be so weird. And who can keep up with all the ways to make lists for who can see what... 👀 idk I know I had to deal with it in this role more than ever before. Got me thinking. Alot.

Get comfy, this will a long ride. I (41f) am the middle of three daughters, ‘Shannon’ (43) and ‘Carrie’ (27) and well mom, we’ll call her ‘Brenda’.
I consider myself the quintessential “middle child”, constantly forgotten, not taken seriously and outright ignored. I got my sister’s hand-me-downs growing up, and don’t dare I ask for anything and actually get it, meanwhile, Carrie was given everything. In high school, Shannon got a tailored dress for prom, I got one off the rack. Shannon got a brand new Focus, I got a 1990 Cougar. Years later, Shannon wanted a newer car, so mom upgraded her to an Explorer. When my car fell apart at the seams, I went out and purchased an Accord. I will admit, mom did co-sign for me because I was only 19, but I was given hell for her doing so.
Shannon dropped out of college after an earthquake hit the area, then she moved in with her boyfriend at the time. I was living at home with mom, working and going to college. My paychecks every two weeks were going to mom to take care of my car note and insurance, all the while mom was paying Shannon’s car note, insurance, giving her money for bills AND Shannon had one of mom’s credit cards “for emergencies”.
While I was working and in college, I was expected to help with Carrie, who was in elementary. I would drop whatever I was doing to pick her up from school, take her to tutoring, cook dinner and help with homework. Mom was an administrative assistant for a private firm, she worked 7am-7pm. One night leaving college, I was involved in a serious accident on the way home, my car was totaled. I eventually was able to get another car from my settlement money, this time I didn’t need a co-signer. Around this same time, I was dropped from college because my grades suffered being spread so thin. I continued working full time, still giving mom money for our bills.
I eventually made the decision to enlist in the Air Force, this decision caught my entire family off guard. Most of the comments I received didn’t surprise me, most thought I wouldn’t succeed. The ones that were supportive, congratulated my decision. I prepared myself to leave home; I made an agreement with mom I would send money for my car note, with the understanding that when the time comes, I will come back for it. Well, that time came and I was met with hostility. Mom decided she wasn’t going to give my car back, it was hers, she “was making the payments”. By this time, mom had moved to Vegas with Carrie, unfortunately developed a gambling problem and I felt helpless since I was so far away.
We’ll fast forward a bit, Shannon is now living in Tennessee. I was medically discharged from the Air Force and after talks with Shannon, I went to live with her. We both worked and shared the bills, I got to reconnect with our older sister from our father’s side (we’ll call her Veronica), everything seemed great. Until… Mom called saying that my car is about to get repossessed, that helpless feeling came back. I ask mom for the information for the finance company, reach out to them, made a payment to stop the repossession, then called her back to let her know she’s caught up. Months go by, Shannon comes home early from work, only to say she was fired for a physical altercation with a coworker. Shannon goes on to say, this is the perfect time to work on her music career. I began working double shifts to cover the bills, all while Shannon is going to the studio. Mom calls one night frantic and furious, the car was repossessed and she was on the bus going to work. This causes a huge blow up between the three of us, because mom and Shannon believe I called and had the car voluntarily repossessed (I did not). Shannon bursts into my room cursing/screaming over how I wronged mom, she grabs me by a leg and drags me out of our apartment and outside into the cold. Veronica picks me up, and I go to stay with her until I got my own place. Things begin to level out, forgive and forget and I start communicating with mom again.
After some time, I found out I was pregnant with my first child and make the decision to move to Vegas with mom. During this time I get to see first hand how badly her gambling habit truly is. I would watch her cash her checks, then immediately push money in a machine and loses it in minutes, this goes on for some time. I eventually have my son and months later start working. I save up to buy myself a car, as well as save up for his first birthday party. I was so excited, planning to go all out! That is until one day I get a call at work from my aunt who lived in our building, she’s noticed my mom coming and going frantically. I didn’t have a bank account at the time, and was keeping my money in a safe hidden in my room… well she found it! When I got home, my room was disheveled and money was gone, all but a few hundred. I took what was left, found a one bed one bath for my son and I and left mom’s apartment.
Enough back story! I’ll bring you to the present! We’re now living in Vegas; I purchased a home in 2015, Carrie moved to Arizona for college, mom, Shannon, Shannon’s 3rd baby daddy (Paul) and 4 kids had a rental home across town. Last summer, they all get evicted. Yes, it was for nonpayment, yes they ALL were gamblers. I allow everyone but Paul to come stay with me, this was not well received. Shannon eventually leaves with her kids, to stay with our cousin Candace, who allowed Paul to be there too. Mom eventually is sent to live with Carrie, because we kept bumping heads. I’ll save you the guess work, Candace gets tired of them being there (rent free) and tells them to leave. Shannon blames ME for Candace putting them out, and gives me an ear full on Mother’s Day. Shannon tells me I’m a heartless b***h, she wishes we weren’t related and karma will eat me alive. I called mom to tell her what has transpired, her reaction was “why can’t we all just get along”. I lose it! She was so flippant and dismissive! No comment about Shannon living rent free in someone else’s home, or the uncalled for and hurtful words to me. So I told mom I needed some space and time, I won’t reach out to her and please don’t reach out to me, then I ended the call.
AITAH?

We talk about passwords a lot (common passwords and password strategies) but we don't talk about pins as much.
This week on his podcast Steve Gibson talked a little about pins. Here are the show notes. He cited a summary of 3.4 million real-world 4-digit pins (from data breaches) plotted in graphic form with first 2 pin digits on vertical axis (scaled 0 to 99) and 2nd 2 digits on the horizontall axis (also scaled 0 to 99) as shown in this graphic
The bright colors are more frequent. You can see a bright diagonal line, which means people are prone to making the 3rd and 4th digits a repeat of the first and 2nd (for example 4747). And the brightest points on that diagonal line are where all 4 digits are the same like 0000, 2222, 7777, 8888. And also 6969.
There is also a bright horizontal line with vertical values 19 or 20 representing years (probably birth years) with the highest concentration being around 1965 to 1990.
And there's a bright horizontal rectangle between 1-12 on the vertical axis and 1-31 on the horizontal axis probably representing mostly birthdays in form MMDD. And a ligher vertical rectangle between 1-12 on horizontal axis and 1-31 on vertical axis representing birthdays in the form DDMM
But the real kicker, out of those 10,000 possible 4 digit pins, the top 20 most-common pins (0.2%) make up 27% of pins in the set. Those top 20 are: 1234 0000 7777 2000 2222 9999 5555 1122 8888 2001 1111 1212 1004 4444 6969 3333 6666 1313 4321 1010.
There are a variety of pin applications with different requirements and considerations. But using something like a birth year or birt day probably isn't a good idea. You could generate a random numeric pin using the bitwarden password generator and unchecking everything except for digits. You may want it to be memorable though. People may have a variety of ways to extract obscure memorable numbers from real life or invent memorable numbers...
=== warning non-scientific approach ahead, feel free to ignore ===
I'll share one way I came up with to generate memorable pin numbers (or at least re-creatable, as long as you remember the seed word):

1. Come up with a seed word that has the same number of letters as your desired pin.
2. Convert every letter to a number by its position in the alphabet (A=1, B=2... Z=26)
   • For example if your letter is L that corresponds to 12
3. Multiply each number by 3 ^(*)Note1
   • same example, 3*12 = 36
4. Take the last digit of each number, that is the corresponding pin digit.
   • same example, last digit of 36 is 6
5. Put all the pin digits together

That procedure maps the letters to numbers as follows:

• A=3
• B=6
• C=9
• D=2
• E=5
• F=8
• G=1
• H=4
• I=7
• J=0
• K=3
• L=6
• M=9
• N=2
• O=5
• P=8
• Q=1
• R=4
• S=7
• T=0
• U=3
• V=6
• W=9
• X=2
• Y=5
• Z=8

As you can see it spreads the 26 letters out over the 10 digits pretty well (there are 4 digits assigned 2 characters each and 6 digits assigned 3 characters each).
As an example if my word is WARDEN, then my pin would be 934252
It's not great from an entropy perspective. A 6 digit random pin represents one of a million possible 6 digit pins, but my 6 digit example could be derived from one word "warden" which is probably among the 8000 most common words. But personally I take a tiny bit of credit for obscurity of the method (at least until I posted it on reddit, whoops) and it's not like this is a master password (typically a pin is backed up by physical security).... and more importantly this can give a pin which is memorable /recreatable and sometimes that factors into the decision.
(*)Note1 - You could use the same procedure multiplying by 7 (instead of 3), and the 26 letters would again spread out pretty well over the 10 digits... but the multiplication is a bit harder. Or you could multiply by 1 (instead of 3) and the multiplication is trivial and the letters would again spread out over the digits... but in that case the procedure is less obscure.
Take it or leave it, it's just a thought.

So originally this was a question from a redditor, u/Madmax0622, about why Gepirone hasn't been on the market yet despite being approved in September, 2023 and doing some research into has led to a rabbit hole of murder, intrigue, and one very disappointed boy having his father arrested at his 7th birthday party. Okay, not really, but the story is interesting and there is some important points to make about how drugs become approved and how data is represented. So i thought I would mkae it a full post (and comments have a smaller character limit).

What the hell is Gepirone?

Gepirone (Exxua) is a novel azapirone drug that is thought to work as a partial agonist at the Serotonin-1a (5HT-1a) receptor. This is a fancy way of saying that Geprione is a drug that is structurally similar to other serotonin receptor agonists. In the United States we only have Buspirone (Buspar, approved 1986) as our 5HT-1a agonist but internationally there are several others such as Perospirone (Lullan, Japan), Tandospirone (Sediel, Japan), and Binospirone (China). All in all, these drugs share very similar structures and only really differ in their pharmacokinetic properties such as half life, bioavailability, and first pass metabolism.
Where Gepirone differs from these other 5HT-1a agonists is that it is a partial agonist which means that when administered into the body, it creates a partial response to the receptor rather than a full response. While Gepirone is novel because it is the first drug who's primary mechanism of action (MOA) is this partial agonism at 5HT-1a, it is not an unknown one. Several common medications also have this mechanism, such as some newer antidepressants (Trazodone, Vilazodone, Nefazaodone), old and new antipsychotics (Haloperidol, Olanzapine, Clozapine, Ziprasidone), and some other known anti-anxiety chemicals (cannabidiol, LSD, and gingko biloba).
So if Gepirone wasn't the first drug to work on 5HT-1a, why did it get delayed?

What did the data say?

Well I should say first that Gepirone did show benefit. In a double blind trial of two different doses of Gepirone in treating depression, patients received either a high dose, low dose, or placebo and were found to have lower depression scores (HAM-D) at the end of 6 weeks. Based on these results (among other trials, it takes years and millions to submit a drug for approval--im paraphrasing here), Gepirone's pharma company Organanon submitted their data to the FDA. Their package of data contained one positive phase 3 trial--a randomized trial of over 200 participants with drepssion who either received Gepirone and had a reduction in depression score of 9.05 points (17% reduction in depression score) vs those who received placebo and had a 6.75 reduction in depression score (13% reduction) after 8 weeks of treatment.

• Their big bad trial of only ~200 people is not really robust so the FDA rejected their 2001 application and told Organanon in 2002 that they needed two large trials with positive results. Okay....Organanon submitted the two trials in 2003 and even added in data on relapsing depression when Gepirone was stopped vs continued. What they found was that people who stuck with Gepirone ER (at this point they reformulated the drug to be extended release) had a relapse rate of 23% vs people who stopped the drug had a relapse rate of 35%. The FDA looked at this data and said, "yeah that's not positive enough" and walked out of the room.

Feeling dejected, Organanon was sitting on the marble steps outside the main FDA office when little Fabre-Kramer came walking by.

"Hey Organanon, did the FDA deny your reapplication?" Fabre-Kramer asked. "Yeah, they said my drug failed to show explicit benefit. That in the analysis of the main endpoints, submitting 25 studies and only have 2 be positive against placebo and the rest be negative or fail when challenge other established drugs doesn't show positive results." "Man that really sucks. How much did you spend on developing this drug?" "About $1.3 billion." "Well that's not too bad, you just got NuvaRing (2001, still makes up 22% of their revenue) approved and are making a killing off of it. Likewise you are still making boatloads off of Mirtazapine (1997)." "Well don't tell anyone but we are actually in a major scandal with Medicaid in Massachusetts and Texas where we were defrauding state government," Organanon lamented. "Yikes, that sucks," Fabre-Kramer said, "Hey, why don't I take Gepirone off yours hands. Afterall I originally got it from Bristol-Myers Squibb in 1993 before I sold it to you in 1998." "Aight, bet."

And so Gepirone was handed off to Fabre-Kramer in 2005 so Organanon could write off this whole venture to their shareholders.
Fabre-Kramer started by conducting an additional randomized trial of 238 adult participants who received Gepirone ER for 8 weeks. Results were....the same as before--people who received Gepirone showed a 10 point reduction while the placebo group showed an 8 point reduction. In 2007 this third trial was included and sent over to the FDA for approval (for the 3rd time) and the FDA looked at it and said, "yeah no thanks kid." They said that the positive results from the most recent phase 3 trials was good but the 23 other small trials that showed negative results was troubling.
Fabre-Kramer then pushed up their glasses and pulled up their suspenders a bit and said, "I'd like to appeal that decision" and in 2012 the decision was send to the FDA's Psychopharmacologic Drugs Advisory Committee (PDAC) in Dec 2015. In a 9-4 ruling, the committee voted that Fabre-Kramer smelled funny and they were dummy and that their drug was not good enough. They said they could resubmit another drug application again when they had more data.
Eventually Fabre-Kramer did submit another application in 2022 and Gepirone ER was approved by the FDA for the treatment of Depression in 2023.

If Gepirone was denied so many times, does that mean its a bad drug?

It would be easy to look at Gepirone's story and say that the drug is just not good enough and the pharma companies had to complete multiple trials (and thus generate more data) to prove its efficacy. Truthfully, its a mixed bag and I am going to try to shoot down the middle hear so you can make an informed decision on your own if you want to try Gepirone ER.
The Good

• Its always good to have additional drugs that focus on mechanisms that we know work. Remember that Gepirone works very similarly to Buspirone, as they both affect 5HT-1a, but importantly it has a longer half life. Unlike Buspirone, Gepirone is offered as an extended release form so instead of 3-4 doses a day you'd potentially only have 1 or 2.
• Now Gepirone is a partial agonist while Buspirone is a full agonist, which does have some important pharmacodynamic factors but based on the impact of other partial 5HT-1a agonists as discussed above, we can say that Gepirone is likely to work the way we want it. So you can attack the receptor that Olanzapine affects without all of Olanzapine's other effects.
• Likewise, the side effect profile is similar to or better than Buspirone. Again, this is most likely due to the improved half life or extended release.
• Gepirone also respresents another option for a non-traditional antidepressant that 1) does not cause weiight gain and 2) does not cause sexual dysfunction--two of the biggest reasons why people stop their depression treatment.

The Bad

• The data is very meh. Look at the differences in scores in these studies of reduction in depression score when given Gepirone vs Placebo: -9.04 vs -6.75; -10.2 vs -8.0; -9.0 vs -6.6; -10.1 vs -7.8. These differences are extremely close--a difference of 3 points (12.5%) in someone's depression? Would you take a drug knowing it would only lead to a potential 12.5% reduction in your depression after 8 weeks? Now its important to note that some people did have massive benefit, and im glad they did. But on average, 12.5%. Not great.
  • Now, don't get me wrong, Buspirone also doesn't have great data. In the trial that got Buspirone approved it showed that 7.5mg 3x daily of Buspirone had a HAM-D score reduction of 10.45 points vs the placebo of 7.92. So only a 10% reduction in depression score. But, then again Buspirone was primarily approved for anxiety, not depression like Gepirone, and Buspirone shows a 30-42% reduction in anxiety score at 8 weeks. Maybe Gepirone will show better results in Depression-Anxiety copresentation.

Alright, this is where my brain is wanting to stop for now. If I think of additional things to add I will throw them in. Cheers!

Throwing my husband a Fallout themed 30th birthday and I was to get some of the in game posters printed out but I cannot for the life of me find any alternatives to just "Surface Never Vault Forever". I've watched him play and know there's a heap of different ones (unless I'm imagining it). Please link or share any of the slogans you've seen in game! Save me before I go mad! Haha!

My husband and I have asked our families to donate toward buying a backyard play structure for our daughter’s 3rd birthday instead of presents (we have sooooo many toys she doesn’t play with). We currently have a deteriorating play structure that was here when we bought our home and it’s falling apart but she loves it. We want to replace it ASAP because she wants to play on it every day but it’s not safe. It has a slide, swing set, monkey bars, a climbing wall, and and upper and lower platform, so we’d like to keep those features (I don’t really care about the monkey bars). We want to keep the price as low as we can without buying a super cheaply made play set. We’re having a hard time finding any that don’t have conflicting reviews. Has anyone had any good experiences with any particular brands? Thanks!!

Weird pattern of both Sedona and Rylee’s relationships always ending near someone’s birthday
1st breakup: breakup between S and R right before R’s bday
2nd breakup: R broke up with Z right before Z’s bday
3rd breakup: between S and L right on (or right after?) S’s birthday

Skip to 3rd paragraph if you are lazy
I (16F) have a very bad relationship with my parents due to a plethora of reasons I believe they are narcissists and that they do not care about me (particularly because they say it) and also because they have a long history of physically abusing me especially because when I was about 11 and became selectively mute and sewer slidable from the stress and it gives me headaches when I cry. Their work surrounds caring for the elderly but my mum has admitted to leaving clients without a bed for a night. All this said I truly think they are horrible people who I cannot last around much longer... But anyone would call me a spoilt child if I did because no-one knows this.
Fast forwards to my birthday. My SIXTEENTH birthday. From the years of degradation I have found it hard to make friend especially with kind hearts so I don't have any right now I don't think I'm better than anyone I'm just very shy. I went to sleep on the big day it was after school so I was tired and I took a nap.
I wake up and its 9:30 my mum starts yelling at me for wasting everyone's time and because they all put so much work into my party and I didn't want to come.They didnt even wake me up. They didnt even try. I know this because most every morning one of them comes and wakes me up for school without fail. But they all pretended I was the selfish one.
Fast forwards to my dad's birthday I was outside because I didn't want to join in and my mum said I kid you not "Is it that hard?" to celebrate his birthday I didn't even argue I just went to my room because she never has or will give me a sincere apology for any of this and she only takes care of me when she sees me pulling away or becoming slightly mute again.
AITA?
WIBTA if I went no contact at 18?
IT GETS WORSEEEEEE more ask reddits to come...

I’m currently pregnant and I’ve only told a select few people (people who actually care about me). My mom wants to share it with the whole family. These people don’t even know my son who will be 2 soon. They hardly come around and don’t have a relationship with me beyond a surface level one. She doesn’t understand why I don’t want to share my news with them. Would you share the news with people who literally don’t even make an effort to spend time with you and yours even though you include them in on events you have?
For my son’s bday party last year 2 of the people in question showed up only to show face & were both gone before we sang happy birthday. The 3rd person didn’t show up at all or send anything. What would you do in this situation? I know they’re probably going to be upset once they find out but atp idc because again they’ve proven to me that I’m a non factor in their life so I don’t see the point in sharing my news with them for them to act fake nice.

My(35m) girlfriend(32m) have been dating for roughly 2years and living together for 1year. She has 3 boys(10, 9, 4) I have no kids if my own. The older two call me dad and respect me as such, they however are very lazy and disobedient when I’m not around (my previous post longing for help with this was met with awesome feedback). And the 4 year old is a complete mess, anti social and 100% mamas boy. I’ve recently set boundaries to prevent myself from being the maid/nanny where I won’t be picking up after them, doing ALL the chores only to come home to a mess. FYI she works mornings and I work evenings. The issue I’m facing is that every time we go out shopping, park, amusement park etc. the 4 year old is unnecessarily made the centre of it all with his horrible behaviour, he doesn’t listen to me or gf, throws fits and runs wild. Every park visit and even beach visit is all about chasing him around catering to his needs, I used to love the beach and now I hate it. I’m always the 3rd wheel as the older boys do their thing and she chases the 4yo around. She’s convinced this is normal and won’t understand that he needs to behave better and listen for everyone involved to enjoy their time. If he would just listen it would be so much better that way we can play together but he’s just off fuckin disobeying…..kinda like he does it on purpose or something.
He cries and throws fits on occasions like birthdays and Christmas if he’s not centre of attention and unwrapping presents. Ex. Mother’s Day, didn’t even come out his room when asked to see mom, just threw tantrums cause she had gifts. He doesn’t sleep at night, just leaves his room and goes through everything, this morning I found a carton of eggs on his bed and 1 egg missing (I work out and watch my nutrition and buy my own groceries and help her financially with hers and the kids) so the food waste kills me, and he wastes 1/2 of all foods! And that egg was 7g protein!!!!!!! LOL
I’m made to be the bad guy and overly critical when all I ask is to allow him to at least try and be an individual to a tiny degree as this sept. He’s going to school (I don’t look forward to the storms that’ll come with that). So, basically that’s like 50% of the issues, but what I have told my gf is that for my own self respect and mental health I do not want to go in public with him, until he learns and she teaches him good behaviour I would not like to waste my time going out and feeling like crap and third wheeling, her response is that she wants a partner to do family things with and who enjoys all of her kids etc. it’s like she’s in denial that even she’s embarrassed and hates it half the time. Now it’s either I don’t go and she treats me like a stranger all weekend or I go and get crapped on for ‘looking miserable’ and eventually end up chasing 4yo around. Feels like a lose lose thus I resent weekends.
My gf calls my evil and a hater when I keep my distance from him, calls me a bully when I call him out for not washing hands (I’m a retired healthcare provider and like to be clean myself and my home). She will shut down intimacy sometimes based on how my interactions with him go. It’s INSANE. To the point getting engaged is no longer a short term goal as she needs me to love him and pamper him to be approved for her hand. Wtf! Hahahaha so weird rereading that!
Am I wrong to not want to put myself in those situations? Should I just go out with them and pretend I’m okay? Like I’m even in therapy because of them and next visit I’m addressing this. Although my therapist told me her husband doesn’t go EVERYWHERE with her and their kid. It makes me unhappy and only do it cause gf says it’s important to her, even though 90% of outings end in her and I arguing because her kid SUCKS! This has me so sad, lost, and misunderstood. I love them all and do all I can for them, but I feel for my sanity in trying to draw a line (temporarily) yet she loses her mind thinking I don’t love him. what to do, oh what to do?

Today, we’re building Kamen Rider Ghost, AKA Tenkuji Takeru. This is my 4th entry on building Kamen Riders in D&D.
Let’s start off with our goals for this build. First, we need to be immortal, or at least have ways to be better at avoiding death. Second, we need to be good at punching and being slippery and elusive like a spirit. Lastly, we need to make sure we can help enrich the lives and spirits of our friends.
For stats, we’ll be using Point Buy. Roll for stats if you want, just keep your Dexterity and Wisdom high.
15 Dexterity, as you are pretty quick and acrobatic as a Rider
15 Wisdom, as you are very insightful and know how people are feeling
13 Constitution, as Riders need to be tough
10 Charisma, you are pretty persuasive and very kind, we’ll get some skills to help out.
10 Strength, as while Riders are very strong, you’re still a young man.
And 8 Intelligence, you do know a lot about spirits, but you spent most of your life in a temple, not a university.
For Race, Takeru was a human killed by a Ganma on his 18th birthday and brought back to life, so we’ll make him a Reborn Human. You either get +2 to one stat and +1 to another, or +1 to three stats. We’ll actually go with +1 to three stats, rounding out our Wisdom, Dexterity, and Constitution. You get Ancestral Legacy, giving you proficiency in 2 skills of your choice. Persuasion and Animal Handling would be my picks. You also get Deathless Nature, giving you advantage on saving throws against poison and disease, resistance to poison damage, advantage on death saving throws, you no longer need to eat, drink, breathe, or sleep, magic can’t put you to sleep, and you can finish a long rest in only 4 hours instead of 8. Lastly, you get Knowledge from a Past Life, letting you add a d6 to any Skill check you make an amount of times equal to your proficiency bonus per long rest. Take the Acolyte Background for Insight and Religion as you are the heir to a Shinto Temple.
We’ll kick things off as a Monk, as you were trained in martial arts by your father. 1st Level Monks get 2 skills from the Monk List. Acrobatics and History would be my picks. You also get proficiency in a set of Artisan’s tools. Go for Calligrapher’s Tools as they’re the best ones. You get Unarmored Defense, making your AC 10 plus your Dexterity and Wisdom modifiers when you’re not wearing armor, and you get Martial Arts, letting you use Dexterity instead of Strength for your unarmed attacks or Monk weapons, and they use a d4. You can also make an extra unarmed attack as a bonus action.
2nd Level Monks get Ki, letting you start tapping into your Rider powers. You get Ki points equal to your Monk level that recharge on a short or long rest to augment your abilities. Flurry of Blows lets you spend a ki point to make 2 unarmed strikes as a bonus action after you attack instead of just one. Patient Defense lets you spend a ki point to Dodge as a bonus action, and Step of the Wind lets you spend a Ki point to Dash or Disengage as a bonus action, along with doubling your jump distance for a turn. You also get Unarmored Movement, giving you 10 extra feet of movement speed while unarmored. You also get the option of Quickened Healing, letting you use your action to spend 2 ki points to heal yourself equal to your Martial Arts die plus your proficiency bonus. Lastly, you get the option of Dedicated Weapon, which allows you to make any weapon that isn’t heavy that you’re proficient with into a Monk weapon, in case you wanna wield the GanGun Saber.
3rd Level Monks can pick a Monastic Tradition, and Way of the Long Death is fitting for one who’s experienced death. You get Touch of Death, letting you gain Temporary Hit Points equal to your Wisdom Modifier plus your Monk level whenever you reduce a creature to 0 HP.
3rd level Monks also get Deflect Missiles, letting you use your reaction to reduce the damage taken from a ranged weapon attack equal to 1d10 plus your Dexterity Modifier and Monk level. If this damage is reduced to 0, then you can spend a ki point to throw it back at the enemy.
Bouncing over to Cleric for a few levels, as you are of the Shinto faith. We’ll go with Grave Cleric, as it deals with life, death, and easing spirits, and is much more morally sound than Death Cleric. You get Circle of Mortality, letting you heal the maximum amount whenever you cast a healing spell to restore someone from 0 HP, and you learn the Spare the Dying Cantrip, which you can cast as a bonus action and has a 30 foot range. You also get Eyes of the Grave, letting you detect undead such as the Ganma within 60 feet of you as an action an amount of times per long rest equal to your Wisdom modifier.
For your Cantrips, Guidance and Resistance are excellent for helping out your friends, giving them a d4 to add to Ability Checks and Saving Throws, respectively, and Thaumaturgy is useful to give your attacks and transformations special effects. For your spells, you can prepare an amount of spells equal to your Cleric level plus your Wisdom modifier, so 4. Take Protection from Evil and Good, Cure Wounds, Shield of Faith, and Sanctuary. You also get the spells Bane and False Life from the Grave Domain List.
2nd Level Clerics get Channel Divinity once per short or long rest that you can use for 3 different effects. Turn Undead lets you use your action to force Wisdom saves on Undead creatures within 30 feet of you, and on a failure, they’re forced to run away from you. Harness Divine Power lets you use a bonus action to regain a spell slot of a level equal to half your proficiency bonus. Lastly, as a Grave Cleric, you can use Channel Divinity for Path to the Grave, letting you use an Action to mark a creature within 30 feet of you, and having them take twice as much damage from any attack they receive, perfect for setting up a finisher. For your spell at this Level, take Healing Word.
Back to Monk, 4th Level Monks get an Ability Score Improvement or a Feat. Take the Eldritch Adept Feat for the Mask of Many Faces Eldritch Invocation, letting you cast Disguise Self at will so you can transform. Alternatively, if you have an item like the Hat of Disguise that already lets you do that, then take the Weapon Master feat for +1 to Strength and proficiency in 4 Martial Weapons of your choice to better represent the GanGun Saber and its other forms.
5th Level Monks get a pretty big power spike. First, you get Extra Attack, letting you Attack twice in one turn, or 4 with Flurry of Blows. Second, you get Stunning Strike, letting you spend a Ki point when you attack to force a Constitution saving throw of 8 plus your Proficiency bonus and Wisdom modifier. On a failure, they are stunned until the end of your next turn, giving advantage on all attack rolls against them. Third, you get the option of Focused Aim, letting you spend 1-3 ki points when you miss an attack roll, adding +2 to the roll for every point spent to better guarantee your punches land. Lastly, your Martial Arts die increases to a d6 for slightly stronger hits.
6th Level Monks get Ki-Empowered Strikes, making your unarmed attacks Magical. 6th Level Long Death Monks get Hour of Reaping, letting you use your action to force Wisdom saving throws on creatures within 30 feet of you. On a failure, they are frightened of you until your next turn.
7th Level Monks get Evasion, meaning when you make a Dexterity Saving throw to avoid taking damage, you take no damage on a success, and only half as much on a failure. You also get Stillness of Mind, letting you use your action to end an effect of Charmed or Frightened on yourself.
8th Level Monks get another Ability Score Improvement. Bump your Dexterity for better AC and damage.
9th Level Monks get Unarmored Movement Improvement, letting you run up walls and on water as long as you end your turn on stable ground.
10th Level Monks get Purity of Body, making you immune to poison and disease. Your Unarmored Movement also increases to 20 feet.
11th Level Long Death Monks obtain Mastery of Death, letting you spend a Ki point whenever you drop to 0 HP to instead drop to 1 HP. This has no limitations as long as you have Ki points to spend, so while you may have died many times throughout the show, your plot armor and will to live will constantly keep you up. Your martial Arts die also increases to a D8.
12th Level Monks get another Ability Score Improvement. Cap your Dexterity for better AC and the hardest punches.
13th Level Monks get Tongue of the Sun and Moon, letting you understand and speak all languages. The power of friendship and kindness transcends all linguistic barriers.
14th Level Monks get Diamond Soul, giving you proficiency with all saving throws, as your power becomes great enough to excel in almost all situations. Your Unarmored Movement also increases to 25 feet.
15th Level Monks get Timeless Body, meaning you no longer suffer the frailty of old age. Your resurrection basically kept you forever 18.
16th Level Monks get our last Ability Score Improvement. Bump up your Wisdom for better AC and Ki save DC, as well as another Cleric spell you can prepare. Take the spell Command.
17th Level Long Death Monks get Touch of the Long Death, letting you use an action to touch a creature and spend anywhere from 1-10 ki points. That creature must make a Constitution saving throw or take 2d10 Necrotic damage per ki point spent on a failure, half as much on a success. Combine this with Channel Divinity and watch the numbers go up. Your Martial Arts die also increases one more time to a d10.
Our Capstone is the 18th Level of Monk, and you can now have your Mugen Damashii with Empty Body, letting you spend 4 Ki points as an action to turn invisible and giving you resistance to all but Force damage for 1 minute. Keep in mind that being Invisible gives you advantage on attack rolls and enemies disadvantage on attacks against you. You can also spend 8 ki points to cast the Astral Projection spell on yourself to truly venture into the spirit realm. Lastly, your Unarmored Movement increases one more time to 30 feet.
Now that we’ve hit Level 20, let’s go over the strengths of this build. First, you are slippery and hard to take down with 19 AC, Evasion, proficiency in all saving throws, and Empty Body, with Mastery of Death keeping you up in the fight. You also can dish out a crazy amount of damage with Path to the Grave and Touch of the Long Death, dealing upwards of 220 average damage with 10 ki points spent. Lastly, you have some good low-level Cleric spells to help support your team.
For weaknesses, you can burn through your Ki Points very quickly, especially as a Long Death Monk. Between Flurry of Blows, Mastery of Death, Focused Aim, Empty Body, and Touch of the Long Death, 18 can easily become 0 before you know it. You also have below-average HP for a frontline fighter at around 143 average, meaning that despite your resistances and evasion, enough damage can still bring you down. In addition, you also have only three 1st level spell slots and 1 use of Channel Divinity per day, so you need to use them wisely. Last, but not least, you're playing a fairly barebones build. Outside of your subclass features, you’re basically playing a standard Monk with a few spells and immortality tricks, which I guess is poetic given that Ghost is a fairly barebones season. And just like Ghost, it’s not terrible by any means, just not as feature-heavy as other Riders

Hi all,
I will be in bangkok & planning to travel down to Koh Samet on June 3rd which seems to be a public holiday. Will there be any issues with getting busses from bangkok or boats to the island?

Yesterday was my 37th birthday and I played in my first VSGA (Virginia State Golf Association) competition. It was hosted at Blue Ridge Shadows in Front Royal, VA. I am currently a 12 handicap so my division was mid handicap (8.5-12), and I won 3rd place in the Net division. Shot 87, net 75. I placed 14 overall. I am super stoked about this and am hooked on competition golf forever. My 3rd place prize was a $20 gift card to the pro shop and got a sweet hat. It was the best birthday ever!

I apologize for my writing.
I met Jason and his wife Madison about 3 years ago through work. We both work for a local high school - Jason is the principal and I am a faculty member. I've gotten to know Jason and Madison pretty well over the past 3 years. Our little work group got to know their family, their kids, have been to their house for hangouts, celebrate their kids birthday, etc.
Things started off normally with our friendship with the both of them, but then it became more and more evident that the way Madison treats Jason has always been negative. It seemed like him and Madison have never gotten along. Jason once admitted that Madison would write negative things about him in a "burn book" journal she kept. She would edit pictures of them that she posted online by slimming his face or whitening his teeth. She told him that she was "threatened" by the women (both of them married) in the group. Any gifts we bought Jason for the holidays would always end up broken. It felt like Madison was jealous of our friendship with Jason.
Later, we would sometimes see Jason come into work with scratches on his face, and even a black eye once. Jason typically blamed it on his non-existent "clumsiness" or that his dog accidentally injured him while they were playing. We have raised concerns about the way Jason is treated to him and his family members, but it always seemed to just be brushed off or ignored, and that things weren't really ever bad, or "that's marriage".
Thing seemed to be going fine for a while - Jason wouldn't talk about life outside of work, or the negative things Madison had done or said- they seemed happy. Then all of a sudden, it seemed like a switch flipped and Jason kept to himself and sat in his office, he wasn't social anymore. He would come into work on time, and leave promptly when the work day ended, instead of hanging around to chat or go for after-work drinks like he normally would. He started parking his car in the back of the office, so he could avoid conversation when leaving. He wasn't as responsive in our group chats anymore, and deleted social media.
One day last week, Jason arrived at school with a swollen face. Jason had ended up in the ER. and got 7 stitches put into his lip. When we asked what happened, Jason lied to us, saying that it was another accident with his dog. We later found out through Jason's sister that Madison actually threw her phone at his face. At this point, I actually don't even know if that's true, or if it was another lie that Jason was telling everyone to make the situation seem not as bad.
Jason's sister later told us that the argument had apparently started over a purchase that Madison wanted to make, but Jason said no, so Madison threw her phone at him in anger. Jason's sister mentioned a few other things like Jason would not let Madison take him to the ER and that his dad met him there to be with him, and that Madison said she was going to go to “counseling” with their church pastor’s wife to try and resolve her anger. They have tried marriage counseling before but it failed because she was not a willing participant.
Jason is the Principal at our local high school, this is his 2nd year as Principal, 3rd year at the school. The other night, we were sent a screenshot of another high school's Board Meeting minutes, and it confirmed Jason as being the new Math teacher there. Jason had resigned as Principal at our school and downgraded to math teacher. When we sent the screenshot to Jason asking him what was going on, he was upset that we had found out, and that he “doesn’t want to be a boss anymore”. Jason relayed to his sister the apparent real reasoning, being that he believes that leaving our school and our friendship will save his marriage.
What I'm most upset about is that Jason wasn’t even going to tell anyone he was leaving. He was going to cut ties with all of us, and move on. His last day would be next Friday, and we'd never hear from him again. We are all worried for his safety, but he doesn't seem interested in cutting ties with Madison. He truly believes he can save his marriage if he moves on from us. I keep trying to tell myself that I don't care; but I do. He is throwing away his life, his friends, to try and please her. I know that it will not get better. It hurts me that there's nothing I can do to convince him or change his mind, and his situation won't improve.

I already posted the first time I saw my ex parked in front of our house. Welp, I'll be posting again since this is the 3rd time and I finally confronted him. Nung una kasi, di ko nilalabas eh until an unknown number called me kanina so sinagot ko and ex ko pala. He said na nasa labas siya. So I finally got to ask him the reason for his visits lately. He said he just wanted to check on me, wanted to know if I was okay. Backstory: Dinala ako ng ex ko sa Laguna and we lived together for almost 2 years then he cheated on me so I moved out and continued my life still in Laguna. So ayun, he wanted to know if I was doing okay despite of the things that he did to me. Sila padin nung girl he cheated on me with ha. Lol He also said that his mom is asking about me and because I'll be celebrating my birthday soon. I don't know what to feel but I sure hell want to get this off my chest.

We did CIO on his 6 month birthday! It was hard to hear him cry but he adapted quickly and went from 30-45 nursing to sleep - to asleep in 3-15 minutes after put in his crib. The first month was amazing- he’s always been easy to put back to sleep after feeding.
We aim for 3 hours past 3rd nap wake up before bed, about 7pm. He was doing really well - from 4 feeds/night to 2 feeds (game changer for our family!) 1 @ 12 and 1 @ 4, up 6:40am.
For the past two weeks he’s been waking at 10pm. I’ve tried letting him CIO (so rough) and just feeding him (I’m so tired it’s hard to know what to do) - he wakes again at 12, 3, 5, 6am. I let him CIO last night at 10, he cried for over a 1/2 hour then up at 11:30pm, 230, 5 for the day. Oof.
We shoot for 2-2.5 wake windows and 3 naps (under 3 hours) but we’re in a nanny share and can’t control his daytime routine.
Any advice for this tired mama? Also, buddy EBFs and won’t take bottles.

Still sad about mothers day. It was my 3rd one. Every year is the same even for my birthday he plans nothing for me and I recieve nothing except maybe some fast food. We have 2 children my oldest is about to turn 3 next month and I have a 9 month old. My partner works 2 hours away and we just moved here last year so I am pretty much isolated taking care of our children 24/7 since he leaves in the early morning and doesn't get home until around 10pm. I never even have money since I cannot work he says I should have my own but I told him I can't because I have to watch our children full time. I rarely ask for anything and when I do it's to replace something irreparably broken like my shoes or my broken glasses. If I ask for new clothes or a creature comfort he will say "of course we can get that for you! Anything 😘" And act so generous, but then make me pay for it later by yelling at me that I'm using him for money. Also if I tell him I am lonely he gets angry and takes everything I say personally. I am so depressed and lonely somedays I can barely function to take care of myself. Please don't tell me to leave because i can't. I was virtually homeless before all this and have no support, money nothing. The system will eat me and my children up. Idk what I'm looking for here. I'm not sure about alot of things at this point.

For context, I (42) F, have 4 children; (21) M, (19) M, (16) M and (7) F. My ex-partner (42) M and I ended our relationship after 18 years together. These years were extremely difficult, filled with his wide range of substance abuse, gambling addiction and domestic abuse/violence of EVERY kind. The man has been arrested and charged with assault on a family member and again arrested and charged with domestic violence while I was pregnant with my daughter. My sons and I even moved out once before I was pregnant with my daughter, and he then followed after he had found himself homeless. My 3 sons have severe traumas from the years of instability in our home.
When my daughter was approximately 18 months old, he spent 6 months in prison for violating his bond conditions. I had called the police after coming home from work, as my middle child had called, alerting me that his father was verbally and emotionally abusing my eldest.
After coming out of prison, it took him 1 week to come and see my children (as binge drinking was a priority that 1st week) and then came to visit them once a month, on average (we lived 5 mins away from his location).
Wanting for my children and I to start a new chapter in our lives, I had made the decision to move several hours away. This would allow us to depart from the cycle of despair and find a way to repair ourselves. This decision was made after witnessing his lack of interest in making amends to my children or make a connection with my daughter. I had received no push back from the decision.
Ex-partner continued to have access to my children anytime he wished. He could visit them, spend time with them or speak to them over the phone, and he did so on occasions.
As time passed, communication decreased. My daughter would ask to speak with him on the phone. He was not always accessible. I was then asked by him to txt him to see if he was available to speak with my daughter prior to simply calling. The reply would at times, take days. When successful at making a phone call, they will generally speak for approximately 15 minutes and then he will want to end the call. He would emotionally blackmail her by suggesting that if she cries everytime he wants to end the call then he will stop calling (although he is never the one initiating contact).
The last time she had asked to speak with him was February, he had never responded. She has not asked if she could call him again.
Approximately 2 weeks later, he contact my children, letting them know he was overseas. At no point in time had he bothered to oet them know he would not be reachable for some time. I was so angry (still am), as a parent, I could never consider leaving the country without informing my children, it just would not happen. The continuous disrespect my children are shown by the person who has the audacity to call themselves their parent astounds me. Not to mention that this person does not pay any form of child support, provide regularly to their children has the funds to travel overseas.
After returning from overseas, he had asked what I was doing for Easter so he could come and spend the day with my daughter and give easter presents as well as the gifts he had brought for my youngest. Not wanting my children to miss out, he was invited for Easter. Knowing that I was going to start considering putting restrictions on coming to my home as his lack of communication with my daughter was starting to really affect her.
Easter came and went without drama, my children were invited to celebrate their grandfather birthday at a lovely restaurant with the rest of their family. After deliberation and confirmation that their father would not be in attendance, my 2 eldest sons chose to attend the festivities. The day before the party, their father informed them that the party was colour themed, and to wear certain colours. My oldest had asked if this meant that he was now going, he confirmed that he would not be going, he was not allowed inside the premises.
My 2nd left shortly after this as he had made plans with friends to go out that night before attending the party the next evening.
The next day, my eldest left early, as it would give him time to shop for appropriate clothing and match the theme.
At around 2 pm, he received a message from his father asking (not really asking) if it would be ok with him if he came to the party, as he and my son are his grandfather's only real family coming tonight and wants to celebrate his father's birthday (his father's actual birthday was days before. He lives with him and was not there). He had told my son that he did not have to tell me or my 2nd oldest that he was coming. My son told him that he didn't care and to leave him alone if he was going to be drinking.
My 2nd oldest was already at his grandparents house as my eldest finally arrived.
While at the restaurant, their father arrived (to the shock of my 2nd oldest, who had no idea his father was going to be present), not alone (another big shock, this time to both of my sons who has no idea, and no warned that their father had someone in their lives). My sons, kept collected, went along with the evening, although obviously incredibly uncomfortable, and said nothing, not bringing attention to themselves, to ensure they would not ruin their grandfather's birthday. Although their father was drinking (moderately, that is a miracle) did not harrass during the evening. He did ask for a picture with my sons, their grandparents, himself and gf. Not wanting to cause a scene (they were not confortable doing this), got the picture done.
The rest of the night was quiet, my sons went home with their grandparents. Their grand-mother gossiped to my sons all about their father and gf (information they really didn't want to know about). Letting my sons know she was the reason why he was overseas, to meet her family and her children, who she is trying to bring to the country.
When my youngest son came home from work that evening, I did let him know what happened (I had yet to be informed as to the reason behind the overseas visit) that his father was in fact in attendance at the party, not alone. He told me that he knew that his dad was there as all the pictures from the party was already circulating social media, but had not seen a picture of someone he did not know until he scrolled and daw the picture of my oldest sons, grandparents, father and her. This is something he wished he had not seen, and although we had a discussion about this topic weeks ago (having had my suspicions for quite some time), he was not ready to have this thrown in his face.
We discussed his feelings and what I was thinking of doing after I spoke with my 2 sons the next day. He felt more settled.
After my sons came home, recounted their days snd night, I has told them that their father would no longer be welcome in this home, and considering going absolutely no contact with anyone under 18.
The continuous disrespect shown to my sons, the boundaries created and simply ignored by their father, only considering his own feelings and expectations, the feeling of rejection my daughter has now started feeling at such a young age is not healthy. I worry for my daughter, I know the feeling of being rejected by a parent is worse than simply not knowing them. It hurts less, causes less damage.
So am I the asshole for considering banning the sperm donor from having contact with my children?
P.S: My sons dont like their father, at all. They are aware that he is a terrible human being. My eldest just ignores him, to keep the peace. My youngest son is of the believe that he might aswell get something out of the relationship (I dont begrudge him)
My 2nd oldest, there are no word to truly describe just how much he despises that man, he stays in his room when he visits, for the sake of my daughter (I cry as I write this, for the pain my son feels, as that man broke my once happy son).
I have told my sons that if they wish to have contact with their father, then I will support them. I will encourage them to build boundaries, and communicate them clearly and what the repercussions would be. That their relationship should be on their terms, and that nobody elses feelings or expectations should be put above theirs including my own or other family members who always feel entitled.
My youngest and oldest sons are the only 2 I had spoken about the possibility of their father having someone in their lives, as their father was brought up in discussion after his Easter visit on those 2 occasions. I had not told my 2nd oldest because his father is not a topic of conversation ever brought up with him. So he was completely blind sided by first his presence and then the fact that he had company.
He does not have parental rights for my 2nd, 3rd or 4th child.