For the first time in ~10 years, I'm in a mental place where I feel like I don't exhibit symptoms of clinical depression - so yay for that!
For a long time, doctors have attributed most of my issues to said chronic depression - and I concede, the depression was certainly not helping. But the diagnosis of said depression (and also, y'know, being a woman) means that most doctors never believed me that I might have ADHD - I had to beg them to have me complete diagnostic questionnaires.
Every time I take one of these, I score right on the edge between ADHD and neurotypical-ness (same with autism, btw). And next, the doctors say "yep, might be ADHD" and then they do fucking NOTHING. No meds other than anti-depressants, no recommendations what to do next. Nothing.
Now that I can finally see what life feels like with no (or very slight) depression, I can assess myself more clearly. And some issues have stuck:

1. I have very little energy, even for things I want and like to do. The only thing that doesn't take energy from me is watching YouTube and crochet/knitting. Even my other "safe" hobby, which is video games, sometimes feels exhausting. A movie, audiobook or netflix is too much commitment because I can't stay focused and lose track of what's happening. Social events is something I need to recover from, even if I like them and need them in order to not feel lonely.
   
2. I have a very hard time to get started with things, especially with things that require planning / communication with others / multiple steps. I can only do some things when there are deadlines or I'm being forced by an outside factor. That means I can keep up with most things that I have to do (doing the dishes, paperwork, paying bills etc.) but cannot do optional things that would benefit me or that I would like to do (booking a vacation, doctor's visits for stuff that won't kill me, attending a dance class). Even at work, if I don't have an urgent deadline, I work very slowly or not at all. This has cost me a job before and the main reason I don't have issues with my current job is because I now work for my mom.
   
3. My only reasonably productive time is from 4pm to 10 pm. On good days, that is. And when I'm being "productive", I feel its still worse than what a "normal" person would be able to do on a normal day. Also, working in the evening is shitty for my social life.
   
4. Rejection sensitivity is still going through the roof.
   
5. If I manage to get started with something, I need to do it and finish it RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW. If I have to take a break, all the motivation and flow is GONE.
   
6. On the othere hand, if there is something I have to do but don't like doing, that's a massive emotional burden. I can only do baby steps until I need a break, someone has to watch over me so that I can keep going, it takes five times longer than it should and I feel terrible. As a kid, I used to cry for hours when doing boring, hard or otherwise "stupid" homework. At 27, I cry while filing paperwork.
   
7. Sticking to routines is hard. Ever since I finished school, my daily routine has degraded and COVID killed what was left. "Brushing my teeth twice daily and getting dressed within an hour of getting up" has been one of my new year's resolutions. This is the only point where I have noticed some clear improvements lately when my depression get better.
   

The main thing that has changed with me being less depressed is that I hate myself less for the issues mentioned above. With depression, I beat myself up for these things which makes me feel like a total failure. I'm now pretty convinced that my neurodivergency is a massive factor as to why I am / was depressed in the first place, but most professionals won't really consider this. I now am afraid to even ask for medication, because I don't want to be seen as someone who basically wants to do meth legally.
So, that was my "little" rant. I'm glad I was finally able to write something down in a more or less structured way (even though I'm sure I forgot a lot of things). Maybe that will help me convince psych people at some point. Feel free to comment if you relate or have thoughts.

We've been together with my girlfriend for more than a year now and over the past few months it has become apparent that she is a very insecure type. There are reasons behind her low-self-esteem and its development. According to my girlfriend in a previous relationship she wasn't treated with respect, didn't feel important and didn't receive adequate love. She was cheated on at least once which led to her contracting a sexually transmitted disease on one occasion. Additionally comments were made about her physical attributes by her ex bf that she wasn’t feminine enough which ultimately led her to undergo plastic surgery.
I'll try to summarize some of the important events that have stemmed from her jealousy, insecurity, low self-esteem and overall, the thoughts swirling around these incidents.
Events
1.) After being together for half a year one evening we slept at my place and before going to bed we had dinner that I cooked. She noticed a long, light-colored, blondish piece of hair in my bed. When she asked whose it could be I calmly, jokingly said, "I don't know, probably sat on it somewhere." It seemed like her world collapsed and she didn't believe me. I explained to her that I work in a 500-person office, I attend university with thousands of people and I have three sisters - one of whom has the exact hair color she found - so there could be plenty of possibilities. I live in a small studio apartment where I throw washed clothes on the bed and hang them on a drying rack next to it.
2.) Three months later laying on the bed I was scrolling through my phone while she was behind me seemingly watching TV. The next day she questioned me via a voice message about who I was chatting with on Instagram. She saw what seemed like a new conversation, you know the kind where you still see the other person's profile picture in large size. I looked back at my chat history and I had such a chat with a male friend with whom I played music together in a bar. She told me it's a lie and she distinctly remembers that I was chatting with a girl, meaning I can't consider her crazy or hallucinating in this case. If I were to show her that there was no conversation with another girl, it's because I deleted it – she said.
3.) Two months later while I was cooking dinner she suddenly started crying from three meters away in my bed. It turned out she noticed that there were fewer condoms on the shelf than before and she saw it, then concluded that I must be cheating on her. As additional information it's worth noting that when we had been together for three months she started taking birth control pills, so only one condom from the pack had been used. The rest remained on my shelf, but I noticed they would expire sooner or later, so I gave some away for friends.
4.) A few weeks later it was my friend's (Tom) birthday. Four of us guys planned to go out for the night as I was invited to this scenario. On the day of the event Tom was chatting to a yet uninvited friend of his (Jake), who mentioned that they (Jake + his GF) were planning to go to the same venue, so he (Tom) invited them as well last minute to join four of us, who eventually brought his girlfriend as well. I didn't really enjoy the party, I sat in a chair, had a few drinks, then looked at vinyl records online and followed three old acquaintances on Instagram from the suggestions the social media platform gave me. One of them was a girl. At the club, I met a former female colleague, with whom I used to work in a shopping mall during college, so we exchanged a few words at the party, and since we weren't moving together at the party anymore, I said goodbye and wishing all the best to her on Instagram before I went home. She replied the same, to which I didn't respond at all. She got mad for days and the argument here was:

• why could that friend's girlfriend come, while she (gf) wasn’t invited.
• one morning she saw the conversation in the previous messages with my former colleague in the bottom of the chat history, whom I bumped into and exchanged a few words with at the party.
• it turned out she has an application that monitors my Instagram profile and saw that I followed that girl acquaintance. I agree that it was stupid and drinking alcohol is not an excuse.

5.) A few weeks later, I planned for us to go hiking over Easter Saturday. I got sick a week before, then the symptoms came out on her two days late. Since we got sick we didn't talk about the hiking trip that week. On Saturday afternoon, I wasn't feeling well yet, but I pulled myself together and went to visit my mother for lunch and almost postponed sleeping together with my gf that day so I could rest for the next day and have the strength to go to my grandparents in the countryside for lunch as well. She didn't want to come with me to any of the family events, which is not a problem at all, because it’s time consuming, she was sick as well and she usually comes to these events. On Sunday morning before I went to my grandparents, she asked what the plan was for Monday. I had arranged a beach day with my friends for that day 2-3 weeks earlier, and it seemed likely that I would recover by then. She was completely shattered and started crying, saying there was no point in this relationship like this. I make plans with everyone except her, even though we meet three, four, or five times every week, while with my friends and family it's once a month or even less.
6.) The last incident was a few days ago when I bought delayed ejaculation gel, which she noticed and got veeery angry that I didn't tell her right away. I mentioned to her several times before that it would be nice to have a gel sometime in the future, so she can have orgasm more often in case I’m tired, mentally stressed from work and not in the mood. She also noted that since my friend's birthday I always take my phone with me to the restroom and for bathing. She bet it’s because of my former colleague I met and she finds it suspicious that I'm being secretive. Indeed, often the phone is with me and mostly in my pocket. She also pointed out that she thinks I don't use my phone in front of her as often anymore and this is surely deliberate. To be honest, since she imagined that I might be chatting with someone out of thin air, I wouldn't want to give any further opportunities for such nonsense. In summary, there hasn't been any effort on my part to deliberately use my phone less in her presence.
Extra information
+1.) Since the first and fourth event she started seeing a psychologist twice, but after the second run’s fifth occasion she decided it wouldn't help her and it's just a waste of money. We agreed that she needs to figure it out through reading books and maybe listening to podcasts about anxiety and I’ll do my best to assure that she is the most awesome and prettiest girl for me. After that no effort was made for months about this topic by her, so no books and no podcasts. A week ago we had an argument and she subscribed for an audiobook provider, but that’s it.
+2.) One morning, after we woke up she told me about her dream. She dreamt that I have two girlfriends besides her.
+3.) Her mother is also an extremely insecure woman. She covered her partner's shop window so that no other woman could see inside because she became jealous. She asked my girlfriend to call her partner from an unknown number and threaten him to confess that he cheated on her etc.
My thoughts
Is there a way for such a person to change? I fear that it would intensify later in case we move together or something. Perhaps I need to figure this out for myself, but I'm curious about others opinions as well.
We have a lot in common, but I just have the feeling that it might be a ticking bomb and I waste my time as getting closer to my thirties. I had to watch through how my entrepreneur father's life was destroyed by my mother (never had a job) once she felt existentially stable purely from the wealth my Father generated and took more 70% of it.

Hello all, I posted earlier but I didn't put a ton of needed context and info so I'm posting again so forgive me. I'm a 28m in the USA on the East Coast. I've been dealing with these symptoms for the last 7 years to variable degree of intensity. The symptoms are a tightness feeling in my chest, tightness in my rectum, globus, constipation, bleeding and swollen gums, increased flatulence that also smells incredibly bad, bad breath, burping that smells incredibly bad, feeling full quickly, headaches during flare ups, vitamin deficiencies, shoulder and lower back pain, anxiety, and not being able to digest certain foods.
This all started after having to take a zpak and doxycycline for an STD, my symptoms were at their worst at this point. My doctors assumed that I had prostatitis because if my complaining about rectal pain and put me through numerous antibiotics such as Cipro, levaquin and bactrim but these did nothing. Eventually I get referred to a gastrointerologist after they realized their mistake, over the years I had an endoscopy and colonoscopy done specifically to see if I had Crohn's, I luckily escaped that, Ive done the breath test for HPylori but came back negative, I'm not convinced it wasn't a false positive and in a couple of weeks I'm going to get another endoscopy done, I specifically asked my gastro to take biopsies in my stomach and small intestine to see if any bacteria or fungus comes up.
I think it might be something bacterial because a few months after my initial outbreak I had to take doxycycline again for a different issue and all my symptoms went away for a few days before coming back in a more mild state. My gastro diagnosed my with autoimmune gastritis and said antibiotics can have that effect but I feel like she's bs'ing me because of how at a loss we both are.
Also, I noticed I felt a ton better and my globus and some of my stomach pain subsided when I stopped taking my antidepressant medication Wellbutrin. Don't know what that's about.
In the last few months in particular though my symptoms have been fluctuating. I had to take doxycycline again for a UTI and it flared up my symptoms again, my doctor put me on Omeprazole 20mg twice a day or a few months and I slowly felt okay, however my symptoms flared up again but settled down after I stopped taking the Omeprazole but then flared up again this weekend and are at a constant at the moment.
What do you guys think?

I am interviewing for two companies tomorrow. One is a MEP consulting company and the other is an Independent system operator. I had a couple of questions. Both are entry level roles.
-For MEP, what are some key concepts that EEs should know and what would make me stand out to the interviewer? (I have experience with Autocad but not revit)
-For Power systems, can someone break down how the U.S power grid functions on a very high level? Or point me to a resource that breaks it down. I have a good grasp of how power grids work since my master’s concentration was in power systems, but I don’t know any practical knowledge such as how different interconnection regions, reliability regions, etc. work together. For example, which parts of the power grid is national grid responsible for? NYSEG? ISOs? Which companies handle generations? How do different regions work together? Any explanations on the overview of the US Power grid would be appreciated.
Also any interview tips would help. Thanks!

Greetings!
About us:
We are an indie game developer and game publisher Two Cakes Studio. We developed and published Time Trap: Hidden Objects on Xbox but the original version was developed by our good friends Crisp App Studio.
About the game:
Time Trap is a hidden object game telling a detective story with distinct realistic visuals, puzzles, and challenges. Unravel the mystery of a missing journalist by investigating an apocalyptic zone full of anomalies and dangerous secrets.
Xbox Store: https://www.xbox.com/en-us/games/store/time-trap-hidden-objects-remastered/9n6rgk1xnzn1
Twitter: https://twitter.com/TwoCakesStudio
Discord: https://discord.gg/j6yByJJTKS
Website: https://twocakesstudio.com/
The AMA team today:
/mrShcherba - Valerii
/revchukve - Vitalii
We are thrilled to have a good chat with you, guys! Feel free to ask anything! Let’s add some fun here - we’ll choose the 3 best questions and 2 of the most active users and give you the code for the game!
Are you in?

Hello! I've made comments here on this subreddit before, but this is my first time as a contributor. If you have any tips or feedback, then that'd be great. Thank you, have a great day and God bless! :D

Adonijah Sets Himself Up as King

1 When King David was very old, he could not keep warm even when they put covers over him. ² So his attendants said to him, “Let us look for a young virgin to serve the king and take care of him. She can lie beside him so that our lord the king may keep warm.”
³ Then they searched throughout Israel for a beautiful young woman and found Abishag, a Shunammite, and brought her to the king. ⁴ The woman was very beautiful; she took care of the king and waited on him, but the king had no sexual relations with her.
⁵ Now Adonijah, whose mother was Haggith, put himself forward and said, “I will be king.” So he got chariots and horses^\)^a\) ready, with fifty men to run ahead of him. ⁶ (His father had never rebuked him by asking, “Why do you behave as you do?” He was also very handsome and was born next after Absalom.)
⁷ Adonijah conferred with Joab son of Zeruiah and with Abiathar the priest, and they gave him their support. ⁸ But Zadok the priest, Benaiah son of Jehoiada, Nathan the prophet, Shimei and Rei and David’s special guard did not join Adonijah.
⁹ Adonijah then sacrificed sheep, cattle and fattened calves at the Stone of Zoheleth near En Rogel. He invited all his brothers, the king’s sons, and all the royal officials of Judah, ¹⁰ but he did not invite Nathan the prophet or Benaiah or the special guard or his brother Solomon.
Footnotes: a) 1 Kings 1:5 Or charioteers
Observations/ Questions
1) So here we see David towards the end of his reign. 2 Samuel 5:4 says that David was 30 years old when he became king and ruled for 40 years, so he's now 70 years old. For verses 1-4 in my Bible, I had a note directing me to 2 Samuel 21: 15-17. At this stage, David's days of fighting in wars are over, so he's no longer in the best shape physically. I don't think he's completely confined to his bed though. 1 Chronicles 29: 22 mentions Solomon being acknowledged as king a second time, so I believe the events of 1 Chronicles 28-29 happen in between the first and second chapter of 1 Kings.
I don't particularly have much else to say about verses 1-4. Enduring Word Commentary on 1 Kings 1 has this note: "It was proper because it was a recognized medical treatment in the ancient world, mentioned by the ancient Greek doctor Galen. When Josephus described this in his Antiquities of the Jews, he said that this was a medical treatment and he called the servants of 1 Kings 1:2 “physicians.” I should also mention that I looked up Abishag on Bible Gateway and she's not mentioned again in the Bible after the next chapter. Feel free to add any further insights/ takeaways that you have for verses 1-4.
2) What are your impressions of Adonijah in this section?
According to 2 Samuel 3:2-4, Adonijah is David's 4th son. Amnon and Absalom (David's 1st and 3rd sons) are dead as we know from 2 Samuel. David's 2nd son is Kileab/Chielab (AKA Daniel in 1 Chronicles 3:2), the son of Abigail the widow of Nabal (from 1 Samuel 25). From what I've seen in commentary notes, the belief is that this 2nd son was either dead or somehow unfit to be king. The thought crossed my mind that it could be possible that Kileab could be both alive and eligible, but turned down the crown. I'm not familiar with how succession rules worked in those days, so feel free to correct me if that possibility I came up with is unlikely.
For verses 5-6, I have John 5:44, 2 Samuel 14:25 and Proverbs 3:5-6 written down in my Bible. Adonijah takes a lot after Absalom and even uses some of Absalom's strategies like 2 Samuel 15:1.
Verse 6 stands out a bit for me. One modern phrase I've seen recently was something like "This person sounds like someone whose parents never told them no", which could apply here to Adonijah. I think it's safe to say that from what we've seen in 2 Samuel 13 that David wasn't really a great father unfortunately.
Not to put all the blame on him of course, for what Adonijah ends up doing. For verses 7-8, I have Psalm 75:6-7, James 4:10 written down in my Bible. I also have Leviticus 3 written down for verse 9. I would assume that's included since Adonijah's trying to use these sacrifices to act like he has God's approval in front of the people.
3) I'd also like to bring up Proverbs 22:6 as a possible verse in regards to Israel's leadership as a whole so far. I was rereading 1 Samuel recently and came to a realization. Israels' most current leaders so far have been Eli, Samuel, Saul, and David.
Eli-We see God judging Eli and his house for what happens in 1 Samuel 2-3. 1 Samuel 3:13 mentions that "he(Eli) failed to restrain them(his sons)"
Samuel-We don't know how good/bad of a father Samuel was, but his sons were corrupt(1 Samuel 8:1-3)
Saul-We don't know how Saul treated his other 2 sons. Saul tried to kill Jonathan twice (1 Samuel 14: 38-45 and 1 Samuel 20: 24-34), but Jonathan turned out well even when Saul was falling apart as his reign went on
David-already brought up
Solomon later on-Rehoboam has very little(if any at all) of Solomon's wisdom as we'll see
Israel's leadership really seems to struggle overall with the next generation. Still, I don't think Proverbs 22: 6 is a permanent rule, if we consider later on from Ahaz up to Josiah in 2 Kings (Josiah in particular was one of the Southern Kingdom's best kings despite the ungodliness of his grandfather Manasseh and his father Amon).
4) Why do you suppose Joab and Abiathar decided to side with Adonijah? What(if anything) was so different that they didn't side with Absalom before?
Joab and Abiathar are the 2 big names in David's kingdom(Joab as the army commander and Abiathar the priest). Joab I can see conspiring with Adonijah since he's done stuff before without David's knowledge and/or approval(ex: killing Abner, Absalom and Amasa). The next chapter in verse 28 mentions that Joab had conspired with Adonijah but not Absalom. Abiathar I'm not too sure about. I've seen commentary notes state that Abiathar was envious of Zadok the priest. It's not completely out of the question, but the way the commentary notes I've seen try to explain this felt like a bit of a reach to me.
5) Minor note here. Joab has 2 brothers, Abishai and Asahel. Asahel we know was killed in battle by Abner in 2 Samuel 2. Abishai is never mentioned after Sheba's revolt in 2 Samuel 20 and the list of David's men in 2 Samuel 23, so chances he died at some point before 1 Kings.
6) What else stands out to you in this passage? (Any further insights, questions, etc?)

Part 32, a return to Kraisal, and my return to actually posting chapters. We get to see the aftermath of the four-part operation, and I get to deal with Reddit formatting changes. I upload Wednesdays, at 4PM to 5PM British Summer Time. Credit to u/SpacePaladin15 for creating the universe of NoP, and the amazing u/ShermanTheMajor for proofreading! And thank you guys for reading. Enjoy the chapter!
Memory Transcript Subject: Second-Lieutenant Kraisal, SC Fighter Pilot Flybird 6, Callsign ‘Mimic’
Date [Standardised Human Time]: July 7th 2168
We all took our seats in this new, bigger briefing room. Despite the concrete walls, it still felt somehow nicer than the last one, more high tech. It might’ve been the lighting, shining down a dim electric blue on all of us.
I looked to the others, who all seemed to be in various states of exhaustion. I still felt pretty energetic, and most of the pilots looked well enough, but the other SCOSG members? Vilik looked like a blood vessel was about to pop, Larsela looked like she was barely awake, and Pegasus… I wasn’t sure. I never was with him. At least we all made it through okay enough. What happened to the others to make them so exhausted, though?
The base commander waved her tail, and we all looked at her as she began to speak. “The operation was a complete success. Despite unforeseen factors in some of the combat operations, you’ve all displayed a commendable level of resilience today. You should be proud of yourselves for making it this far” Damn, the hell happened to the others?
“While most of the pilots in this room were escorting our transports here, Mimic successfully destroyed most of the rebel anti-air and armoured fighting vehicles, with some assistance from friendly partisan forces, and paratroopers from the one-hundred-and-second airborne division. She also successfully shot down an enemy aircraft attempting to intercept friendly planes. Thanks to her actions here today, we all have a place to land, rest, and refuel, as well as a staging area for attacks deeper in enemy territory and towards the planetary defence guns”
“Meanwhile, Quartz One successfully escorted the East Sea Fleet past enemy naval defences, despite resistance from a small enemy fleet blockin her path. She also successfully shot down an enemy mercenary pilot, who was armed with laser weaponry and a superior aircraft. This has allowed us to strike closer to the planetary defence guns without having to rely as heavily on our air support. The Captain of the leading vessel also sent her a bottle of whiskey as thanks, though this will be locked up for the time being”
There was a small amount of chatter at the prospect of alcohol, and a couple people looked to Lars. That lucky bird. All I got was a scratched paint job.
“Quiet!” The base commander yelled, causing the chatter to cease before she continued. “Furthermore, Magnum successfully destroyed several IRBM silo’s, despite heavy ground resistance. He also successfully intercepted two IRBMs before they could reach friendly territory, despite one of these missiles both launching before its silo could be discovered, and being capable of evasive manoeuvres at low altitudes. This has prevented the enemy from launching potentially devastating attacks on our backlines, saving countless lives and allowing us to continue offensive operations unimpeded”
She took a small breath, and cleared her throat, before continuing. “Finally, Pegasus Three successfully escorted the transport carrying defectors into our territory, despite several attempted intercept missions from enemy squadrons, the loss of all decoy aircraft, and the pilot and copilot both being shot, with the former too injured to fly and the latter dead. He also successfully shot down an enemy mercenary squadron attempting to intercept the transport, despite being outnumbered by superior aircraft. The transport successfully landed here, and the pilot is stable. The passengers themselves are mostly unharmed, outside mild bruising from a rough landing, and are going through debriefing”
Jesus Christ, I thought my mission was the hard one. At least I didn’t have to dogfight a fucking missile.
“Overall, this leaves Coalition forces in a highly advantageous position in the war going forwards. The only remaining advantages held by the rebels is the fog of war, and the planetary defence guns, and we are almost in a place where we can wipe out the latter. Excellent work. Dismissed!”
As we all filed out of the briefing room, I began moving through the crowd, when I felt someone tap me on the shoulder. Turning around, I noticed one of the paratroopers, looking to me with a slight grin on his face. “Hey, you’re that pilot that saved our asses, right? I wanted you to have this” He then held out a pack of jerky. “As thanks”
“Oh shit, thanks dude!” I replied, grabbing it and immediately devouring its contents.
“It’s the least I could do after you brought us through a second suicide mission alive. Shit, at this rate there’ll be propaganda posters with you on em”
“Eh, just doing my job” I grinned. “Look, I gotta go, see you around?”
“Sure” He replied casually, before walking off.
I turned around and began heading to my friends, managing to intercept Vilik and Larsela. The formers tail was wrapped firmly around his leg, while Larsela was rubbing her eyes with her talons, as if trying to stay awake. “Hey you two!” I greeted “How did you handle things? You both definitely look… Rough”
“How does it look!?” Vilik snapped, before audibly sighing. “Sorry, sorry. Just stressed. I had to deal with five fucking missiles, two of which managed to launch, one which had stealth capabilities, and the other nearly reached criticalaltitudeand-”
“Okok!” I cut him off. “Go figure out which bunk is yours and lie down or something, jesus!”
“Fine, fine! I’m going” And with that, he stormed off, leaving me and my very tired pal alone.
“So…” I began. “What about you?”
She stared into the ceiling for a moment, before slowly looking at me. “Hm? Oh, yeah. It went ok…” She then yawned, and began to stagger off. “I need to lie down though. Maybe we can walk and talk before I find my bed?”
“Sure!” I replied, walking after her. “That works!”
“Right, right… Yeah things went well, most of the fleet made it out untouched. The fact the Promenade had a railgun certainly helped. The rebels surrendered after the second ship was horizontally cut in half”
“Oh, that sounds cool as fuck!”
“More scary than cool” She responded, as we entered one of the barracks. “I felt it firing in my bones…”
“Oh, damn. Nevermind then… So uh, remember this morning? When you were gonna ask me something?”
“Hom? Yeah, kinda… Why do you ask?”
“Oh, I was just wondering what you were gonna ask me is all!” I chuckled.
“Oh, it’s… It was nothing” She muttered, before coming to a halt at one of the bunk beds. She quickly checked the two footlockers sitting at its foot, before crawling to the upper bunk. I decided to check the lockers too, noticing my stuff was there along with hers.
“Lucky coincidence…” I murmured, before sitting on the lower bunk, stretching, and taking a moment to relax, staring up at the bunk above me as I rested on the hard mattress. That moment to relax was then interrupted by an officer walking in, looking around the room, then walking up to me and Lars.
“Excuse me” They began. “Have either of you seen a uh, ‘Pegasus’ around here?”
Larsela waved a wing and flicked her tail feathers, signalling no, while I sat up slightly and shrugged. “Why are you looking for him?”
“The wife of one of the passengers wanted to thank him for saving her husband” They responded. “I believe the passenger in question is the one that flew the plane after the pilots injury, as well”
“Try checking the runway or something. I don’t know, maybe he’s checking out the hangars. He was usually around that kind of area in the last base, anyways”
“Right, thank you” They nodded, before walking off. I flopped onto my back, closed my eyes, and rested.
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I work as a forensic mental health nurse and have done so for a number of years in an NHS hospital. We are incredibly short staffed, the CQC rates us as inadequate in every category apart from care. I am bored of the politics the constant stress and the pointless emails. I applied for a job with a private provider of eating disorders services, this is a very small hospital, the beds are all NHS patients. I have attended an interview where they showed me around and in fairness it appears to be a caring holistic service, far removed from my current job. They have offered me the job as a charge nurse and have said this starts at the equivalent of a band 6 wage, they say this is negotiable. I am currently at the top of band 5, my current employer pays overtime plus an additional "lead". This amounts to a fairly good wage, on average around £50k. I am entitled to the full 33 days of leave + 8 bank Holidays and I also work long days so only 3 shifts a week (normally work another 1.5 days of overtime on top), I pay into an NHS pension. If it was not for all the BS I would not want to move, I enjoy nursing forensic patients. I am due to speak to the private hospital tomorrow. I am panicking when I look at pure numbers, it feels like I would be giving up a lot for a salary approx 15k less, however if I move to another NHS hospital it would still be 15k less.Has anyone else moved from NHS to Private? Did you negotiate your pay? Terms and conditions? Any advice? Any questions I should ask? I feel quite scared of leaving the NHS and all that goes with it.

For reference, I’m taking an online math class for the summer.
I emailed my professor 5/13 at around 2:30pm asking a question about a test that is due this Sunday. I didn’t hear back so 5/14 I just figured I would take the test anyway so that I can continue with the other assignments that are also due Sunday.
I go to take the test and it is password protected, nowhere on the module, assignment, or syllabus does it mention anything about the tests having passwords. I emailed him again 5/14 at about the same time asking him if there’s a password. I also explained to him that I am only available to take the test 5/14 and 5/15 because I have work all day Thursday-Sunday.
He also states in his syllabus that he is accessible via email and usually answers within 24 hours. It’s 5/15 at 11:15am and I just emailed him again.
Is it my responsibility at that point if he doesn’t answer me? What else do I do??

Hey guys!
Tomorrow wil lbe the first time I will be doing a react native interview for the company I work for.
My boss asked me to give the interviewed person a homework exercise to evaluate their code.
Is there any way to do this in React Native?
Won't they need a mac to emulate the devices to see what they are doing?
Any advice or sugestion will be appreciated.
Thanks in advance and sorry if it is a dumb question.

I'm scared that I'm completely losing myself or being emotionally manipulated in my relationship. (1 yr together, known each other for 10). My partner (29 M) supports me in my self care & work & hobbies & loves to boost me up, but he also frequently tells me things I've done wrong. I'd always rather he be honest about his feelings, but i feel like it's very frequent. Something comes up at least twice a month where he says he doesn't feel listened to or valued or "like a partner" in our relationship and things blow up. This has happened for 3 months now. Before this i dated someone for 4 years who was very reserved, so I got used to feeling very needy - therefore, I have a lot of empathy for needing love and affection and I try to make his needs met. I have tried really hard to fix previous tangible concerns like letting him know when I'll be away from my phone for a while or making changes to not be late to things. We have had some really good strides where I've been able to tell him my needs more or own up to my small failings. But the last 72 hours have been a nightmare even with my growth and progress. I'm sorry this post is lengthy but I'll try my best to explain the current situation:
Sunday my bf slept through his brother coming to visit on accident. He woke up and texted me and said he was spiraling a bit about feeling bad about it and would be okay but just needed a "5" to show him I was there. (this is supposed to be a call back to us saying I love you 5 ever in the past)
I didn't see his text for 30 minutes and then told him l was soo sorry I didn't see this sooner and that I was really sorry he slept through his alarm and missed that, but his body must have needed rest. He said it's okay, it's just my brother.
We spoke for 40 minutes about mothers day and other stuff and then he said "hey you never sent a 5" and I said "oh shoot, 5". It then was shared that it really upset him that I hadn't read and replied to that part of his text. It made him feel not listened to, he said, that I chose to reply how I wanted instead of doing what he asked for. I apologized and also said sorry I didn't say a 5 sooner and that I wish I had seen his text and sent a 5 right away. He got upset that I was apologizing for not texting him right away. He said apologizing for the thing he's not even upset about (not replying for 30 minutes) takes away his agency and takes away from him feeling heard.
He then explained it wasn't fully about the 5 - it was that it hurt that I didn't ask more about his feelings and just changed the topic after he said "it's okay". I think sometimes I forget people say "it's okay" to try to be strong when really they want to talk about their feelings. He emphasized he wished I had asked about his feelings and I said I definitely should have and need to be better about asking more follow up if he opens up and says he's spiraling.
I apologized a ton Sunday night and called him and cried to him on the phone about how much I cared and how much I didn't want to hurt him. He told me it was going to be okay and he even told me he felt loved and cared about. He showed appreciation when I took accountability and I said things like "I totally see how it made you feel not heard that I didnt do a small thing you asked for" and "I really should have followed up by asking more about your feelings or why you were spiraling".
Monday he got upset again once he woke up and said I was defensive yesterday and it hurt and that I talk at him and not with him (I did get defensive a bit by saying things like "I didn't know you weren't still okay and I took it at face value when you said you were okay" or saying "I told you I know I messed up and I shouldn't have ignored you opening up to me" when he brought up again how hurt he felt. But sometimes he repeated how hurt he was and how he wished I would hold myself accountable. So I would at times get defensive by saying "well I tried telling you that I'm sorry I ____"
I didn't know what to keep saying besides sorry and that I messed up. I tried keeping my answers brief after he said i was making things about myself (being emotional in my guilt) because i didnt want to risk monopolizing the conversation. Then he told me I really hurt him because he shared 2 paragraphs about how hurt he was and I gave a 10 word answer. I apologized multiple times for my 10 word answer. I said I only kept it short to keep the focus on him. He said it felt like I wasn't even trying. I tried asking what else he needs or what I could do to help and he told me I'm just Asking "out of self preservation". Then when I said I wish I knew what I could do to help he said "did you ask". Three different times when I said I wish I could make him feel better or things like I am trying to give thoughtful answers he would say "did you ask" and then I would say "ask what?" And get frustrated when he didn't give me a straight answer. When I got upset for not getting an answer to my question, he said I was making it about me again.
At some point he asked for examples of me asking accountability. I sent screenshots of when I said I messed up and hurt him and I should've done differently and he got upset and said "those are from yesterday and don't impact how I feel today". I tried taking accountability again today in multiple sentences. He seemed grateful that I did and was glad to hear me list the things I messed up and take the blame for. But then when I brought up something i was hoping we could still do (a surprise party for him) he got really upset and said I was only thinking about what I wanted (to see him and get him to the surpise) instead of what he wanted (to not go out). This led to him skipping his own surprise party yesterday. It was so embarrassing because I didn't know how to explain why he wouldn't come with me (I was supposed to be the one to bring him to the surprise) and his friend ended up making up that he got too wasted beforehand. Even since the party he has only said how his wishes feel ignored and he never wanted a surprise party (I guess a misfire but his friends really wanted to do the party so I went along). No apology for not even coming.
A chunk of yesterdays convo, word for word: M: "I felt so small when you gave me a 10 word response I felt like I didn't explain enough or wasn't good enough . And to not really have a response, it hurt me so bad."
F: "I'm sorry for hurting you so much and giving so small of a response. I'm really sorry for the things I did to make you feel small."
M: "thats not what I'm worried about or bothers me"
F: "What are you worried about or bothered by? You shared it Made you feel small when I sent a 10 word response, so I thought that was a part of the problem."
M: "Not really related and makes me feel worse about getting the love I need/want"
F: "i don't understand. You brought up how much hurt you and how low it made you feel, how is it not related?"
M: "Did you ask?"
F: "I'm asking now"
M: "I'm sorry, I didn't realize you being hurt negated everything I've felt?"
F: "What? Where did I say I'm hurt?"
M: "You're asking a question so you could feel good or secure but I dont feel I'm afforded the same"
A seperate convo chunk later that day:
M: i spend so much energy and get so little in return. When I reach out and ask for help everything gets focused on how you felt. When do I matter?
F: I'm sorry. I hope you can get to feel like you matter now. I have been trying to do what you need and put very little focus on myself and I'll keep trying
M: If you can't try or listen to what I'm saying or asking for just leave me alone and make this whole situation easier. I'm exhausted and tired from giving you grace and somehow things always focus back on you.
_--- Then In several texts asked him if he explain how things kept coming back to me and he said the focus just keeps coming back to me.because I won't take accountability. He is embarrassed and doesn't feel good enough. Because I don't show him support when he needs it and don't show i care in the ways he wants or needs the way he supports me when I'm low.
F; I'm sorry and I wish I had afforded you the same. I'm trying to give thoughtful answers, sorry if they have to be short because I'm at work. Can you explain how you feel like the focus has been coming back to me in today's convo.
M: did you ask?
F: ask what? How did I make the focus on me?
M: dude we aren't doing this again
F: dude I asked for clarification becuase I don't get your question
M: It's not about you. I don't think you're ready or capable of loving me the way I want or need. I feel like I've given you grace and afforded you the space to make or acknowledge mistakes. I can't keep begging to be heard and feel like I'm overreacting or misunderstood. It's fine to ask for clarification, but when you do it hijacks the conversation and we never revist what I said.
F: because I don't get an answer so it's hard to revisit the topic when I'm still confused
M: I'm sorry , I didn't realize that me spiraling or being in a bad place was only continued because you didn't get a response. This isn't about you.
I want to get him to couples therapy because I care about him SO much and he has a really big heart and a good soul. But once he feels hurt, it's like he's stuck being the victim and can't see how horribly irrational our conversations are going. I am not perfect at conflict either - I get defensive if he keeps talking about being hurt, and I end up crying a lot to him about how bad I feel for hurting, and sometimes he has to help me calm me down from my intense crying over the problem I caused, which is draining for him. But I think at least in this case he is really stuck in a victim complex where he isnt doing any wrong and I'm not doing much right to him. I genuinely feel like therapy could really help, and that the couples therapy would support my individual therapy working on defensiveness and emotional control. I want to support him, but I'm nervous to just outright ask for it. What do I do? How could I ease into the topic?
TL;DR: Although I have tried to be very patient and take accountability there are a lot of things I do that hurt my boyfriend. I have worked on improve some concrete things but our most recent conflict (detailed above) has me feeling anxious and lost because I try taking accountability throughout but he is still upset no matter what I say. I don't think he knows how to handle conflict and I'm not perfect at it either but i am very willing to name everything I do wrong and try to change it. I want to suggest couples therapy so he can see we can both do better. Not sure how.

Hi everyone, I've been lurking this subreddit for a while and it's really nice to know I'm not the only one who has this. I spent over 2 years not knowing what was happening to my vision until googling "static vision" and this subreddit came up and I was like "YES, that is exaclty what I've been experiencing". Here's a bit of background:
My visual snow started in March of 2020 when I began taking a medication called clomiphine (clomid) for an unrelated hormonal issue. Pretty immediately I started noticing visual side effects from the medicaiton, which included a blurring, and darkening effect over my entire visual field. I stopped the medication after about a week after speaking with my endocrinologist. These acute visual effects seemed to lift, but over the course of the next few days I noticed that my vision seemed generally worse and that I couldn't stop seeing eye floaters. I experienced the visual "veil" of static over my vision, an abundance of eye floaters especially when it's bright out, terrible night vision, and palinopsia. Never had aura migraines or headaches. I may be one of the lucky ones because over the past year I've seen some major improvement, I don't know if it is just due to the passage of time or what but here is what has helped me:
Etifoxine: I noticed after taking this for about a week my visual snow just seemed different, it was still there but not as noticeable. Almost as if the fuzziness effect was sort of absorbing all the floaters, I also noticed that my night vision improved. This effect was drastic as when I took a flight recently I saw way fewer floaters when looking out of the window (ususally I can see a full field of floaters while looking at the sky from a plane, or while ice skating for some reason). I actually wouldn't say there are fewer floaters, but it's as if they are "softer" and I can see through them. I still have some and plan to take another course in a few weeks.
Switching prescriptions: I accidentaly wore my old prescription glasses for a week and didn't notice. When I went back to my new glasses I felt my brain was confused and my visual field trying to adjust. Weirdly it felt like there was an improvement in the sharpness of my vision. Now I occasionally wear my old glasses for a few days and I feel like my visual snow is a little improved for a few days and might have some long term effect.
Kratom: take this one with a grain of salt as there is some controversy around kratom. I don't think anyone should take this supplement regularly as it is addictive and can cause major withdrawals. There's an entire subreddit devoted to the terrible withdrawals this opiate-like drug causes. I think it also might be bad for the liver. I'm a bit of a degenerate so I bought some to see what it was like. When I took a high dose I noticed my vision acuity was reduced similar to how it gets when I'm really tired, everything just looks a little glazed and kind of glassy. But for whatever reason when it wears off the next day my vision seems improved, and these changes seem to persist! Again, use at your discretion but this was a game changer for me.
VS relief Overlay: another user made a VS overlay that I use and it's also helped me alot while i'm working at my computer: https://github.com/belvederef/visual-snow-relief-overlay/releases/tag/v1.5.2
I don't think it does anything long term but does seem to help while I'm using my computer.
Anyway that's been my experience so far! Hope this helps some of you! and let me know if you have any questions and don't despair! I think this is something that will be solved in our lifetimes.

Background:
During my C&P exam for anxiety, my examiner diagnosed me with PTSD and submitted a initial PTSD DBQ. I also already had a PTSD diagnosis prior to filing but filed for anxiety as that is what I was seen for when active duty and have in my STR.
The examiner didn’t give a medical opinion on the initial PTSD DBQ. The rater then kicked it back for an anxiety medical opinion (what was originally claimed) and she gave a less than likely opinion.
During my VERA call the representative recommended that I submit a PTSD claim as the opinion she gave was unfavorable for the anxiety claim.
I submitted a PTSD claim yesterday which will probably be combined with my open claim as I have deferred claims.
I have a verifiable stressor and submitted that documentation with my original claim (under anxiety) and also again yesterday for the PTSD.
Question:
Does anyone have experience with this? Will they make me do anotherC&P exam for PTSD even though the examiner did a PTSD DBQ in March?
Thank you

Sorry for bad english, not my first language...
A little background: I'm currently 17 years old. I've been having thoughts about it since I was in 8th grade especially when my childhood dog of 10 years died, but kept trying to think positive as I promised him I will try to live. I've been physically "disciplined" by my mom, she's a single mom, and ever since she had been strict to me about studying. Physical discipline is normal from where I live (Philippines) that's why I endured it, everytime my dog was the one to comfort me.
Back to the story, just recently I'm almost graduating and the talk of which university I'll be studying in came up. I have always maintained my grades and have been a consistent honor student despite my circumstances. My mom talked to me saying she couldn't afford the tuition. I've always wanted to study medicine, but was forced to apply for engineering. I applied to one of the top schools here in my country, (University of the Philippines), which I knew had about 12% acceptance rate, and miraculously passed. She told me that if I choose to study medicine, I'll have to suffer and just endure if she gives little to none, basically saying she won't support me... so I chose engineering as my choice... Not wanting to give up, I also applied in the US, wishing to get an opportunity and got scholarships as well (not full but offered).
Just earlier, my mom once again talked to me and told me she wouldn't be able to support me at all... I asked why and she told me I was selfish for gettng accepted to only one university (in the Philippines) and didn't give her much options (That was a state university, not the cheapest but cheaper than others), (and when I have to take an entrance exam for other universities she told me to not waste money and just stick to one). All she basically said was, "If only I had enough money, this is just what it is..." and if only I did better on snagging scholarships. I was appalled as SHE was the reason I couldn't get other scholarships here. Whenever there's an interview that needed a parent, she never came and kept making excuses... She's basically telling me to just give up studying.
I don't know anymore, I don't have any motivation to live...

So I have a bit of a situation I am dealing with from afar, but I'm hoping I can get some information to pass along to relevant parties ...
I tried calling my birth mother (hereto referred to as "P") this Sunday to wish her a Happy Mother's Day (my adopted mom passed away last February). When I called, I discovered that her phone was disconnected.
In response, I immediately called the local PD for a welfare check. When they got back in touch with me, they said there was no answer at the door.
I then reached out to my birth half-brother's wife (hereto referred to as "T"). She also requested a welfare check. Somehow, "T" was able to get a bit more information than me, maybe because the officer was being a little more thorough in his investigation of things.
The police told "T" that when they looked in the window of the "P"'s house, it was "a hoarder's nightmare". I recall being in there once before and it was in bad shape even then; based on what I was told, there is nothing more than a path to walk through the house now. I was also told by "T" that my half-brother and "P" had a bit of a love/hate relationship for a while; "T" now serves as a mediator of sorts between them. I personally didn't have any issues with "P", but I had not spoken to her since she had been discharged from the hospital on the first of last year after she had a wreck.
One good thing about finding your birth parents is that you learn a lot about yourself; in the 18 years I have known her, I have learned a lot about who I am based on our past interactions.
"T" then told me the last time she spoke with "P", she was exhibiting early signs of dementia, as she would not remember who she was talking to even after she indicated who she was to her.After doing some further investigation with the assistance of one of my birth mom's friends, "T" was able to find out that "P"'s utilities had been disconnected at her house for some time and that she went to the hospital at the start of April (reason(s) unknown).
After doing a little more digging, "T" discovered that "P" was released from the hospital (exactly date/time also unknown), but was transferred to an assisted care facility (location unknown). Fortunately, that means "P" is being cared for, but according to my "T", "P" had lost quite a bit of weight the last time they had interacted. Personally, the last time I saw her was the Christmas before my mom passed away and she looked fine at that time."T" will continue to investigate and offer me more information regarding "P"'s location and status when she can.
Here's where the "AIW" question comes in ...
"T" was listed as an emergency contact for "P". At this time, I do not know where or how this was documented, but that doesn't change the fact that that she was never contacted the last time "P" ended up in the hospital, nor when she was discharged. She has tried calling several assisted living facilities in the area, but all of them refuse to give her any information citing potential HIPPA violations. I believe that if she had been contacted, that "T" would have taken steps to make sure she was where she needed to be; she also would have been able to contact me and keep me in the loop regarding what was going on/where "P" was located. Now, we are all scrambling in an effort to locate her and make certain that she is alive and well and being cared for properly.
My wife works in the medical field. We have one son who had a traumatic brain injury but passed away in July 2019. We also have another son who has ADHD and Autism. So, for all intents and purposes, we are well-versed in all aspects of HIPPA. Could "P"s onset of dementia be the reason why "T" wasn't contacted (didn't remember who her emergency contact was and it was not properly documented on her medical records when initially brought up) or did the hospital and, concurrently, the assisted living facility, simply drop the ball and not do their due diligence? What steps can we take in an effort to locate "P"?

https://commonwealthbeacon.org/transportation/tibbits-nutt-seems-more-like-her-old-self-in-chamber-talk/
Here's the paragraph in question:

She was quick with an answer when asked if there are other states or cities that are doing transportation right. She said California is the best in the world at electrifying trains. She hailed Quebec for its hydrogen-powered trains (“that’s something we’re looking at,” she said). She said the Pacific northwest is the best at funding transportation, Chicago is tops in expanding services, and Austin, Texas, is the best at building new subway lines. She said Washington State’s free bus service is the best in the US and London and Paris are leaders in keeping the cost of service reasonable.

Fact check:

• California is not running any electric trains yet as of writing, though EMUs are scheduled to begin service on Caltrain this fall. Caltrain electrification is also known for high costs due to hiring of consultants.
• Austin does not have a subway or any rapid transit as of writing. A light rail through downtown is being planned, but while the plan initially called for a downtown subway in 2020, the tunnel was removed and replaced with surface light rail later.
• In case it has to be said, hydrogen-powered trains are currently seen as a much less proven and possibly less reliable technology than traditional catenary electric trains. This point was echoed by StreetBlogCal, from the same state that Tibbits-Nutt praised for "electrifying" trains.
• While Chicago is indeed pursuing its Red Line Extension, even if we ignore other US cities that are expanding their rapid transit system at faster rates (LA, Seattle, etc), this directly contradicts her earlier statement in October 2023 that "In the United States, especially places that have these legacy systems, they don't do these [expansions of the system] projects anymore".

Long time HA user. Recently have gotten back into setting it all up. I’ve been a long time HK user as well, but they have really fallen behind and I don’t seen drastic improvement anytime soon.
So I have two smaller dogs that have access to our backyard via doggie door. We have a Petsafe wireless fence since our backyard isn’t fully enclosed. This works fairly well, but not real happy with finding the happy location of the fence to keep them where I want them.
My two current situations:
Feeding and monitor tracking.
I’m a home assistant user, so the idea of subscription model for tractive for two dogs isn’t really appealing, I’d be more inclined it would prevent them from escaping to greet neighbors or mailman, but as it is, not something I want to pay $20/m for. It would be nice to see where there are in the house (espresense)) and monitor their activity (maybe esp32 board on their collar)
I have a bunch of esp32 and esp8266 laying around and bought some BLE tags in hopes of monitoring location and setting automations for feeding.
I bought a couple of PETKIT feeders (solo, yumshare) and learned yumshare isn’t available yet in ha. I have the solo setup in ha to only be available if the dog gets close enough. But the use of the yumshare is pretty nice! So kinda stuck on what I want.
One dog will eat the bowl of both dogs, so an automation of some sort would be helpful.
Looked into building my own, and 3d printing, but that’s seems a little more than what I want to get into.
So my question, is there a setup or device that could accomplish some or all of these things?

Greetings!
About us:
We are an indie game developer and game publisher Two Cakes Studio. We developed and published Time Trap: Hidden Objects on Xbox but the original version was developed by our good friends Crisp App Studio.
About the game:
Time Trap is a hidden object game telling a detective story with distinct realistic visuals, puzzles, and challenges. Unravel the mystery of a missing journalist by investigating an apocalyptic zone full of anomalies and dangerous secrets.
Xbox Store: https://www.xbox.com/en-us/games/store/time-trap-hidden-objects-remastered/9n6rgk1xnzn1
Twitter: https://twitter.com/TwoCakesStudio
Discord: https://discord.gg/j6yByJJTKS
Website: https://twocakesstudio.com/
The AMA team today:
/mrShcherba - Valerii
/revchukve - Vitalii
We are thrilled to have a good chat with you, guys! Feel free to ask anything! Let’s add some fun here - we’ll choose the 3 best questions and 2 of the most active users and give you the code for the game!
Are you in?

It can be difficult to know what to say when you’re asked about your salary expectations in job interviews. As long as you do your research and are well prepared to demonstrate the value you can bring to the organisation, you should be able to answer this question with confidence.
When preparing for your next pharma job interview, do your research on the average salaries in your discipline and location. If you’re already employed in a similar role, think about where your current salary lies within that too. This is important because if your current salary is well above the industry average, you don’t want to go into the interview saying you’ll be happy with an industry average salary unless you’re prepared to take a pay cut.
Once you’ve done your research, highlight some key things from your brag file that you think demonstrate the value you can bring to the organisation, and the results you’re capable of achieving. These things together will help convince your interviewer that you’re worth the salary you’re putting forward.
When it comes to answering the question, consider giving your interviewer a range to work with to show that you’re flexible - but choose a range that is realistic both to you and your potential employer. Don’t be tempted to undersell yourself in hopes of getting the job, and instead be confident when demonstrating your value, using your research to solidify why you’re worth investing in.

I had received an interview call after a long while and then I messed it up. :( I have never been this blank in any interview I have ever appeared for. Never have I ever been this low while solving problems. It was one of those interviews where the interviewer was a gold of a person. Was kind enough to change the questions seeing me struggle. But even then I messed it up. And guess what, almost every question asked was something I had solved before. I feel heart broken ever since and in serious doubt of my capabilities. I tried talking this with my friends and they were simply like “accept that you know less and move on”. But I swear I had solved everything and still I failed.
Please suggest ways I can revise leetcode better. And not face this level of embarrassment again.

Last year I used the Uniball Eye Roller Pens for my exams: https://amzn.eu/d/fCQE2co . They’re my go to pen so naturally, I’ve also used them this year so far (for context my exam board is CCEA)
Today when I was doing the first question of my drama exam, an invigilator walked up to me and asked if I was using a gel pen, in confusion I said no. It threw me off really badly as I paused for a while and lost my train of thought, and I could see out of the corner of my eye that she was going up to other invigilators and whispering to them. I tried to continue doing my questions, but then another invigilator walked up directly in front of my desk and lifted up one of my pens, inspecting it before setting it down 😭
Throughout the exam I had in the back of my mind that they were going to come up to me at the end and tell me the verdict, since I was not approached after that, I was worried they were going to tell me I’m disqualified or something and were just waiting until the end. Afterwards however literally none of them came up to me and they let me go, so I assume they decided the pens were okay to use?
When I was speaking to my teacher after I told her what happened and she said that if I felt it threw me off I should report it to the exam board. I still got the exam finished, it just maybe cut 5 minutes off my time and everyone who does drama knows time is precious in the written exam. It also had clearly distracted some of my classmates sitting near me because they went up to me after and asked me what had happened.
I have messy handwriting and these pens flow nicely and make it way more legible. To my knowledge, they’re not really gel pens more like rollerballs which are borderline gel but still suitable for an exam. They worked great for my essay subjects last year, and I also don’t think they affected my grades negatively at all so they must still scan in normally if that’s the concern. I even see people recommending them for exams. It’s just annoying because I had the same invigilators last year too and they only picked up on this now? I’m unsure what to do
Does anyone else use these pens/have gotten in trouble for using them? Thanks, sorry for the waffle 😍

Basically I (25f) run a in home daycare with my bf (25m) and we have a toddler who we’ve had for 6 going on 7 months she came to us as 16 months and is now 22 months (2 in August). The problem is she cries non stop. I must admit the crying has slowed down in the past month but she’s still crying all the time. What I mean by that is the first 6 months she would cry for hours non stop unless she was sleeping literally no exaggeration and now she just cries in intervals. Anytime you say the words stop,no especially she cries. If I’m taking to another child she’s crying she tries to follow me to the bathroom etc it’s overwhelming when I have multiple other kids to care for on top of a 11month old baby. In the beginning I brushed it off as a new daycare/environment but it’s been 6/7 months AND this isn’t her first time in daycare she was kicked out of a prior daycare for the same reasons.
On top of the baby’s troubles the parents are insanely stressful to deal with. Every few months they have to reauthorize their case to continue to get state assistance and each time which as been about 3 times since they started they act like they don’t know how or to busy to do it , so they ask me for help. This past march they didn’t pay because they let their payment expire so I didn’t get paid anything and that’s only a fraction of it… they are constantly texting me about the baby throughout the day which is fine but they say things like can you just show our baby a little more attention than the other babies. Like huh? Why would you even think that’s okay to ask? Then a few months back I had a sit down talk with them about the crying,baby crawling even though she can walk, constantly sending pacifiers just little things like that. And after talking for an hour and giving them advice to help her grow all they said was we will work on it. I told them she is done with the pacifier so to not send them to daycare anymore and literally every morning she has a pacifier in her mom and the mom says that’s the only way she can soothe herself even though she doesn’t use a pacifier for the 8 hours she’s at daycare. Same thing with walking we taught her to walk but they constantly carry her around and barely wears shoes I constantly tell them let her walk so she can learn and as soon as the baby sees the parents she instantly drops to the ground to crawl. On top of that they want us to pick the baby up between 5am-7am (5 if she’s with her dad 7 if she’s with her mom) but whenever they drop her off it’s not til 830/9 why are we picking her up so early? It’s little things like this that stresses me out and I just don’t want to deal with it.I think what stresses me out the most is that I’m trying to be professional and I want to help them because the mom and I graduated together so I’d feel bad by not allowing her to come back but it is completely stressful!!
Now my bf helps me everyday with the daycare but for the past 2 months we constantly argue about this same situation. Her next authorizion isn’t until October and I suggested we let them continue to come until then and just don’t reauthorize. It’s becoming draining emotionally mentally and physically tbh. He insists on keeping the family but it’s not worth it when I’m literally doing all the work to keep her here but the parents aren’t doing their part! After a big argument I told him if he wants them here he will have to deal with all exchanges with the family obviously I will care for the baby while she’s here but I’m not going above. He says I’m an AH for not basically jumping for joy when the baby comes or acknowledging the mom. I do obviously care for the baby just want to make that clear but I’m just not excited when she’s here it sounds terrible but that’s what it is
So AITA for not acknowledging the family?
What stresses me is that I’ve tried helping in many ways giving advice when I don’t have kids myself so I can’t give you much advice just what I’ve learned the past 10 years working in childcare. My bf has only been in childcare for the 7 months we’ve had the daycare and I keep telling him if the parents aren’t cooperative it won’t work out. This isn’t my first time dealing with a stressful family and I understand it won’t be my last but as a business owner it’s my right to say I don’t want to deal with this stressful situation
I