Just had my bilateral salpingectomy today! I saw Dr. Charlotte Pickens in La Jolla, CA btw. It was an amazing experience y'all! Much easier than I anticipated! Buckle up, it's a long one, and very detailed! But all positive for the most part LOL
I'm 34 and have never EVER had surgery aside from getting my wisdom teeth out at 16, and a colonoscopy at 24. Never even broken a bone or gotten stitches, nothing. I have a lot of medical anxiety, I was tripping out the most over sleep paralysis despite anesthesia LOL Wasn't even nervous about the actual surgery, just didn't wanna wake up during it and be mentally scarred for life 🤣 Saw a few scary stories on TV once about that phenomenon.
The office gave me Hibiclens at my consult appt to take home & scrub my abdomen with the last 3 showers leading up surgery. Yesterday morning, yesterday evening, and this morning. No deodorant, lotions, perfumes, nail polish or jewelry after my shower this morning.
I was NPO after midnight last night. They instructed me to drink an ensure between 9pm-11pm last night since my surgery was in the afternoon. I also took half an Ativan last night at 9pm to make sure I slept and didn't have anxiety insomnia lol They also instructed me to take my heart arrythmia pill this morning right upon wakening with a tiny sip of water. I had an echocardiogram a week ago, so yes, I got cardiac clearance lol I also had a pre-op transvaginal ultrasound and blood work 2 weeks ago.
When I got there, they called me back to the pre-op room. I got weighed, asked for my height, and had to pee in a cup first thing. They then had me change into my gown, skiddy socks & hair net. They gave me 2 Tylenol 500mg & a Celebrex (200mg - for preventative nerve pain) with a tiny sip of water. Then they took my BP/pulse ox, and started my IV in my left hand, and started fluids and some Ativan. They also put on the leg compression things, man they feel great lol They got me heated blankets, and even had a lil pack of lavender smelly stuff they taped to the top left of my paper gown for relaxation 😊
All the staff came in and introduced themselves while in pre-op, from the surgeon herself, to the anesthesia team, to the OR scrub nurses, to the surgical resident that'd be observing (with my permission of course.) They also asked if they had permission to let the surgical resident practice a pelvic exam on me while under anesthesia, I agreed. I've been employed in healthcare myself for 17 years, so anything to help with someone's education! I could've refused if I wanted, but I really appreciated them asking beforehand.
They then wheeled me back to the OR, and I was feeling goooood with the Ativan lol They also pushed a lil GI cocktail too before they gave me the gas. I had to scoot myself from my original pre-op bed to the OR table, which was easy, they leveled the beds together and helped me. They then masked me with the gas, and I was outttt like a light after about 4-5 deeeeep inhales!!!
I woke up in post-op an hour and a half later. Went in at 12 noon, woke up at 1:30pm, all done! They intubated me after falling asleep, and pulled it out before waking up, it's like nothing ever happened! No soreness, hoarseness or coughing. I'm clearing my throat occasionally here and there 7 hours later, just kinda feels like when you get "bubbles" (post-nadal drip basically lol) in your throat with seasonal allergies. Not often enough to cause soreness which is great, waaaay better then what I anticipated after reading about other people's experiences on here. They cathed me too since they gave me fluids, thankfully after I was out, and removed it before I woke up, so it hurts to pee just a little bit, not even as bad a UTI 🤣 Like, a 4 on a scale of 1-10.
They gave me ice chips & apple juice straight upon awakening too, which was great! I had no nausea at all, still don't hours later. I rested for about 30 mins, then they brought back my ride to hang out with me and go over discharge instructions. I got up to go pee, and then they wheeled me outside to the car, and even opened the door & helped me get in!! They have $5 valet services for 0-3 hours parking, so the car was pulled right up to the curb right outside the front doors!
We drove straight to IHOP afterwards. I took it easy with some Belgian waffles & a few strips of bacon, and a mango iced tea, and a few sips of my ride's cinnamon milkshake lol I then stopped by Walgreens to grab a few house things I forgot to pick up last night, my ride helped & carried everything 😊
The ride home was smooth, I didn't have any discomfort from the shitty ass bumpy roads on our 30 min drive home lol I did bring a squishmallow to put between my belly and the seat belt, which was a genius idea I picked up on here!
BTW, I'm an occasional recreational cannabis user. I was honest and disclosed my use to my anesthesiologist only (VERY IMPORTANT), I didn't want that ICD-10 diagnosis use code going to Tricare from my consult appt ahead of surgery & prior authorization for obvious reasons lol. I quit edibles 2 months ago, and vaping 1 month ago. My anesthesiologist said I would've been fine discontinuing use just 5-7 days prior to surgery (no ibuprofen 7 days before either lol), but I did a month + to be safe, I'm a bit on the heavier side, and I've heard edibles stick around in your system (fat lol) much longer than just smoking/vaping, so I wanted to be super certain that I'd be clear and not fuck up anesthesia for myself. For reference, I'm 5'6", 180lbs. I took 3-4 puffs of a vape 4-5 days a week, and 10mg worth of edibles once almost every weekend for a few months straight, so not a super heavy user.
I hope my experience can help others make the decision to take the plunge too before election day lol I called to set up the consult appt back in December, had the actual consult appt in February, and first available surgery was today, late May.
I am a generally super anxious person by nature, and had my bestie/coworker take me to my very first surgery. My family is 3k miles away on the east Coast and couldn't be here, so if my anxious ass can do it, literally anybody can do it! I literally have nobody out here but my bestie, no family, no nothing. My soon to be ex husband is on deployment right now out in the Pacific, and is unreachable at the moment, and frankly doesn't give a shit. He knows I had surgery today too, and I KNOW he won't call or email out of common human decency to at least ask how it went when he does get back in service/port. He asked for a divorce a week after my consult appt, which happened to be 2 weeks before deployment, how convenient, after saying straight to my face before & after the appt that he totally supported my choice, and was looking forward to the DINK lifestyle with me. Oh well.
Y'all are 💯 when you say men aren't ~truly~ childfree unless they've had a vasectomy, or atleast got one scheduled on the books soon lol My conservative family back on the east coast are losing their shit over this, they're all christofacist trump bootlickers, I'm so glad I got to move away from all that and experience personal freedom/a different & better way of life out here. I'm so thankful to be in a position financially & geographically to have been able to take care of this. My GYN back home wouldn't even put an IUD in me at 29yrs old cause I never had kid before, so my cervix wasn't soft enough 🙄 Whatever bitch, I left and got spayed in Cali at 34 with no pushback from my Drs out here, kiss my grits lol
Thanks for coming to my hippie TED talk, hope this helps others! ♥️

My younger sister is still at the age where she has no personal hygiene when it comes to stuff like washing hands so she’s always bringing home colds. A few days ago she brought home a cold but I don’t really get scared from them anymore since it’s happened so much. Today I woke up with a stuffy nose so I just had allergy medication like I do every morning, but my stuffy nose didn’t go away all day at school so I assumed I just had bad allergy’s today. I got home and started to feel off so my mom luckily let me skip basketball practice. My other sister had skating practice so they were all out while I’ve just been sitting at home. It’s been around 12 hours since my nose got runny and now I have chills and I’ve ate a lot today so I’m kinda scared I’ll tu* even tho my sister didn’t have any n* or d* when she was sick.

I feel like I can manage pain fairly well, but whenever I have a surgery that involves significant discomfort (or pain that beats in and out rather than being constant), I find it really hard to cope and become completely overwhelmed a few times a day. For example, right now I just finished a nose/throat surgery and it’s hard to acclimate to the pain because every swallow hurts and reminds you, and the discomfort of the swelling and not being able to breathe normally really sends me past my limit. Plus if a bandage feels “wrong” on my skin, I’m ripping it off even if it messes with recovery. Surgery is already not fun, but add in complete overload and overwhelm and it becomes extra difficult emotionally. I’ve had four in the past couple years and will probably need more, and really need to learn some coping mechanisms specifically for neurodivergent people to get through this. I’m grateful that I have access to care and generally keep a good attitude for most of the day, but when I reach a limit I either panic or become really depressed. Does anyone in this group have any good tips??

I'm so fucking tired. No matter how hard I try I never can improve my situation.
These days if you're not a social butterfly that can sell, a programming wizard, or a cut throat business owner, or a combo of all of the above, you're fucked.
I graduated college, I finally landed a job that uses my degree, I work full time. And what did that get me? A life of living in an apartment, no pets, no children, no money for hobbies, nothing.
I pretty much just work, play some xbox (that I bought used for 100 bucks), sleep, and wait for the weekend to maybe go fishing or something.
During the week I work and do deliveries like door dash to make a few extra bucks. But it doesn't really make a difference in the end.
I deliver to some pretty fucking high end houses. I just delivered to a 1.8mil house in the woods on the expensive side of town. And I just wonder, what the fuck do they do to afford that.
I'm tired man. I have health issues. My friends have drifted apart from me and moved away. I don't have my childhood dog anymore.
Really the only thing keeping me here are my parents, but once they're gone I'm checking the fuck out.
There is no reward for hard work, I can't buy a house, probably ever. I can't retire. I can't afford to retire and probably never will.
I know my strengths and weaknesses and I can only work within those bounds, and I know that the world just doesn't give a fuck about someone like me with my talents, no one will ever pay me good money for my abilities. I'm forever going to live in an apartment (if I'm lucky) and that's all I have to look forward to in life. I can't even get a pet because my place doesn't allow them.
What the fuck is the point man.

[CW: talk of ableism and trauma]
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TL;DR: My dad said to my mom when I took out my new fidget toy after a fairly traumatic day: “he’s (not my preferred pronouns) just going into ‘Autistic Mode’”. He said that he would look into group homes tomorrow again because I “treat them like shit”. I shut down around them, and have been doing so for at least a week or more. I don’t have a job, freshly graduated from college as of December, and I have been struggling to get interviews. I have been using my university’s career services and got accepted into Vocational Rehab, but my parents keep threatening to kick me out of the house and be done with me.
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For reference, I am highly confident I am Autistic and ADHD, but I have not been officially diagnosed. I have a referral and am in the process. My med manager is treating me with non-stimulants which work well and have increased executive function. I have also been exploring my being queer over the last few years, but only recently tried to explain to my parents in totality last November.
I knew they are queerphobic, and I knew that I annoy / upset them when I don’t talk and engage, and that when I talk it’s too much and not about the right thing. I just wanted to believe I was wrong. I wanted to believe I was reading into things because I’ve had so many past experiences where what I felt and what I thought turned out to be false. And they say they love me, and they love me so much that they hate to see me in pain, and so I wanted to believe that it’s true.
The last few days have been hard. My parents had family friends over (that have known me since I was a baby, and they have two adult children that didn’t come this round) for memorial day weekend from out of state. Since seeing the friends last, I have been doing a lot of self-discovery and further accepting the queer parts of myself. I hadn’t been planning to change my name, until by happenstance I found one online that I wanted to be mine due to it's simplicity and androgynous nature. But my parents (and my brother, though he has trans friends) have not been supportive. I just thought they raised me and gave me a name they picked out and so didn’t want to use a new one. It doesn’t make it better, but it’s something.
But they have made it clear in past conversations that it would be unfair for me to tell family friends and extended relatives. And so I spent all of last week before the weekend trying to debate whether I should tell the family friends that were coming over in a text message before they arrived. I tried to summon the courage, but I ended up not doing that. So when I first saw them, I shut down when their first words were “Hey, ”. I decided that I would make myself scarce because I knew I would just keep shutting down and having trouble speaking with them. Literally, it would be the same as with my parents where either the words don’t come or I don’t have the energy to get them past my throat.
So, I tried to be polite when I saw them and just didn’t engage in extensive conversation. When they left, my dad told me I was rude and selfish, and that I need to write them a letter to apologize. I ended up sending them a text today to apologize (didn't explain everything), but I didn’t want to send a letter because I am tired of using my dead name, and I would need to sign it.
I have been trying to avoid my parents even though we live in the same house because I don’t have a job yet. I recently graduated from college in December, but I have not been able to get interviews. I have been making use of my university’s career services and made appointments with the head of engineering to make my resume more appealing in terms of software engineering. I graduated with Interdisciplinary Studies focusing on Computer Science, Creative Writing, and Linguistics. I just want a job right now, and computer jobs pay well. I am hoping to figure out something beneficial in Creative Writing later, maybe Ghost Writing or something that might pay better than that. I also got accepted to use Vocational Rehab, and so I have been working with them.
But, since I am avoiding my parents, they believe I am trying to make it clear that I hate them. They consistently say that I “treat them like shit” and I am “lazy and just want an easy life”. Today has been a hard day after all the turmoil over the last week, and so I have had very little energy. I thought I could be experiencing depression, but I know what that feels like and where it leads. I am not there yet. So, I think the best word to describe it is probably dejected. Like the people who are constantly in my life don’t want me. In the late afternoon, I decided I didn’t just want to sit up in my room anymore, so I drove down to my bookstore to browse, and then checked to see if I could refill my meds. I had about an hour where I started feeling happy and enjoying myself, especially being able to browse the books and look at the descriptions on the back and recording the ones I want to read for later.
When I got home for dinner so my parents didn’t get mad, it was like all that happiness disappeared the moment I saw them. I could not move my face even if I wanted to, to pretend like I was cheery and all right. We got dinner out, and then I sat down. The counselor I like seeing at career services is also an ADHDer. I saw her last week to go over more plans for jobs, and she showed me the various baskets of stim toys she keeps on her bookshelf to hand out to students. She gave me one that’s a tightly knit, long rectangle and has a small glass ball inside. You squeeze it and the ball moves back and forth.
I haven’t used stim toys much growing up because I thought I was supposed to bear all the frustration and anxiety. But I have been trying to treat myself kinder over the last few months. So, I’ve been taking that stim toy with me, and had it when I went to the bookstore. With dinner set up, my parents were trying to get me to interact and “be better”. Without thinking, I took out the stim toy. My dad said I was going into “Autistic Mode” and that they can’t do anything. He will look at group homes again tomorrow.
…
Up until that moment, I had doubts. I thought that they really were trying to accept me and it was just hard, especially with all the queerness and years of mental health management (since 2019 when I broke down). But over the last month or so, I’ve had various times where I needed to record my mental health history for intake and I started talking about my parents and how I am starting to recognize the gaslighting and emotional abuse.
I have also been trying hard to remember the good moments. But I can't remember a moment where I was showing signs I am clearly Autistic or ADHD, and that they genuinely enjoyed and loved it. Especially as I've gotten older. I remember them expecting me to get good grades in school from the beginning. If it wasn't "A"s they were upset, and if I failed a test they told me to study again and took me down to school to convince the teacher to let me test again. If I couldn't prove I knew the material and the teacher didn't let me retake it, then I was shunned on the way home.
I want so much to be wrong. I want so much for them to be right and that it's me who is abusing them like they say it is. I don't know why--I don't really feel any emotional love for them and I don't think I ever did, I just don't want them to suffer--but if I am the one who's hurting them then maybe I can change and stop. Maybe I can get better and show them love and be nice to them like they deserve. I wouldn't need to make a plan to estrange myself from them when I am on my feet to better take care of myself. I wish it was me.
I don't know why I am writing all of this. You all have your own problems and don't need to load on mine, and I am not going to pretend I have it the worst even just in my own city. I also feel manipulative, like I am only writing the bad parts and that I should try to remember and describe the good parts.
I just don't have anyone I can talk to right now. I have been out of therapy for a few months. I have been on wait lists for more experienced therapists dealing with gender-affirming care, since that has become a bigger problem. I have something scheduled for the middle of next month with a more general therapist and a referral to a specialized therapist as well.
But I just want to talk to someone who understands. I don't have that in my life. When doctors ask me if I have anyone I can just vent to or trust, I can't think of anyone. I have one friend, but since graduating we only meet up once a month. I can share a lot with her and she is supportive, but then I feel like that one meeting is filled with me trying to vent and seek therapy from her. I don't really want more social interaction, but I want to feel like someone sees me, the real me, and they actually like what they see.
I plan to call the suicide hotline tomorrow. Not because I am suicidal, but because I was told I don't need to be suicidal to call. I know my parents will hear me on the phone if I call tonight, and I don't really want to spend a long time writing out the words in a text to the text number to explain everything when the person on the other end might not be able to fully understand, and so they would just tell me what they think I need to hear. But I guess I'd get the same from the phone call.
I don't know how to wrap this up, and it sounds when I read this over like I am quite lucid and therefore being petty by putting this here. I am lucid, but it doesn't really help me feel better. I can't lie to myself anymore; I've been trying so hard to not lie to myself when I spot it. I am sorry for the long rambling and various tangents. I just want to put this somewhere where people might understand.

I'm so fucking tired. No matter how hard I try I never can improve my situation.
These days if you're not a social butterfly that can sell, a programming wizard, or a cut throat business owner, or a combo of all of the above, you're fucked.
I graduated college, I finally landed a job that uses my degree, I work full time. And what did that get me? A life of living in an apartment, no pets, no children, no money for hobbies, nothing.
I pretty much just work, play some xbox (that I bought used for 100 bucks), sleep, and wait for the weekend to maybe go fishing or something.
During the week I work and do deliveries like door dash to make a few extra bucks. But it doesn't really make a difference in the end.
I deliver to some pretty fucking high end houses. I just delivered to a 1.8mil house in the woods on the expensive side of town. And I just wonder, what the fuck do they do to afford that.
I'm tired man. I have health issues. My friends have drifted apart from me and moved away. I don't have my childhood dog anymore.
Really the only thing keeping me here are my parents, but once they're gone I'm checking the fuck out.
There is no reward for hard work, I can't buy a house, probably ever. I can't retire. I can't afford to retire and probably never will.
I know my strengths and weaknesses and I can only work within those bounds, and I know that the world just doesn't give a fuck about someone like me with my talents, no one will ever pay me good money for my abilities. I'm forever going to live in an apartment (if I'm lucky) and that's all I have to look forward to in life. I can't even get a pet because my place doesn't allow them.
What the fuck is the point man.

Me (19TM) and my partner of 1 and a half years (20TF) had an argument a few days ago. Since then we decided to take a break for the summer and reconnect in the fall to see if we want to continue the relationship. We also live together currently but my job starts in a few weeks and then I’ll be gone for the rest of the summer.
She has had a really tough life. We are both trans and when she told her conservative Christian family she had no choice but to estrange herself from them so she has no familial support. We also have the same group of friends for the most part. She struggles a lot with money and has to work full time during the summer when we aren’t in university. Sometimes our dynamic is hard to navigate as I have a very supportive family who is willing to support me financially as well. I know that this bothers her sometimes.
I feel like she relies pretty much solely on me for her emotional support. I also do most of the housework (cooking, laundry, cleaning). We have tried to work on her doing more but I find it hard to convince her because she is so tired all the time and I normally don’t have as much going on. The argument we had was about the fact that I felt she doesn’t contribute to our relationship in the same way that I do. She countered this by saying that she works all day and so I should be okay with doing most of the housework. I explained that she doesn’t work for both of us though and that she works only to support herself, which is fine it’s just not contributing to the relationship.
I could tell she was slowly getting more upset and started to get angry. I cant exactly remember how we got there but I remember trying to calm her down while still trying to advocate for myself and it wasn’t working. She started raising her voice and then went on to talk about how I don’t do anything, was “stupid” for not understanding the constant stress money causes her, and how I don’t even need to work because my parents do everything for me. This is a sore spot for me as I have struggled with mental health issues and have found it hard to work in the past. That being said I understand her frustration as I do have it really good and I havnt had to worry in the same ways she does.
It’s important to note that we are sitting on our bed at this point, I am against the wall and she is blocking the exit on the other side. Then she grabs my arm and shakes me pretty roughly while yelling about how useless I am. After that I left and went out of the house. I called a friend and didn’t come home until late when I slept in another room. She apologized a lot the next day and cried a lot. She said she forgot she had grabbed me. It’s the first time she’s ever touched me like that. Even though she apologized I’m still thinking about it.
I guess I just don’t know what to think. I understand why she felt the way she did (at least I think I do) but even at my most stressed and angry I could never imagine touching her like that. I guess I need some advice? I don’t think this is at all abusive because it’s really the first time anything like it has happened. I guess I’m just wondering if others have felt similarly in terms of understanding their partners emotional reaction. Thanks and sorry for the long message.

Let me begin by saying that I’ve been pretty healthy for most of my life. My first real health scare came in 2021 when I was diagnosed with Covid pneumonia and had to spend 5 days in the hospital. They gave me remdezevir and nightly stomach shots so that I wouldn’t get blood clots from the meds. Then, In November of 2023 I was diagnosed with diverticulitis after a CT scan revealed the infection. The night before I noticed unusual swelling in my rib cage that wrapped around the left side towards my back. I remember the pain actually started in the center of my spine about 2 months prior to going to the emergency room. It felt like a burning sensation and sometimes it would twinge. I mentioned that to my primary care physician and she ordered an X-ray of my rib cage. All was normal. Two weeks later I had my colonoscopy and all came back clear. No divirticulitis but I still didn’t feel good. In January 2024 I asked my gastroenterologist if he could do an upper GI. He went one step further and ordered an ultrasound too. In February 2024 I was also diagnosed with Gastritis and IBS. In March of 2024 I thought I had a dv flare up and ended up in the emergency room but the dr said no flare up just gastritis and gave me some pantaprazile. Here we are now May 2024 and I still feel terrible. Nausea mainly in the morning , not feeling rested, and still with stomach pains but now the pain has spread to my legs, arms , and ribs. Today I was holding a gallon of milk in my right hand and felt a pain in my middle finger. I can’t really move it now without having pain. Not only have I lost like 30 lbs since November but my Dr has refused to send me a referral to the endocrinologist because my weight has remained constant for a month. Even though my blood work was supposedly normal there were some irregularities like an amnion gap below 4 and high neutrophils and low lymphocytes. I feel like even though I know I have these three illnesses I feel like I’m not getting a full diagnosis. I’m constantly having a new pains in my body not related to the GI. I’ve had insomnia, eye pains, unexplained swelling/pain in my mouth, face, nose, jaw, neck, throat,chest, arms, legs, joints, testicles. I can honestly say I feel pain in just about every part of my body. I feel like I’m falling apart and Im half the man I use to be. 49 years old but I feel like I’m 79. I’m not able to stand for too long without feeling pain and fatigue. I can’t wear a belt because it feels painfully uncomfortable around my waist. Sound , especially in the morning is annoying. I hate wearing socks because it hurts my legs. It takes a lot of energy out of me to even do the simplest things. I use to enjoy mowing my lawn but now it’s impossible to complete. Ib guard has become my best friend as I find that is the only med that gives me relief besides ibuprofen and aleve. I just find it hard to believe that my health can diteriurate so fast in such as a short time. So many days I ask God to take the pain away and to make me feel like I use to feel, Alive!!!. Every day is a constant battle of mind , body and soul. If anyone else feels similar or would like to share their story I’m all ears. Maybe if enough of us share our stories we can find some type of therapy in the words and hopefully we can also find what we are all looking for ….peace , hope, health, and a normal life again.

I 24M, have been dating my NB22 boyfriend for a little over 1 year. We recently have both escaped abusive situations, and he is recovering from a particularly nasty break-up(we are poly, their bf dumped them on the street while they were struggling with unemployment and it REALLY messed him up), we currently live together.
Important information: I am DX AuHD, trying to get medicated for it, and I suspect I have some form of DID/OSDD. I struggle a lot with memory, it's just something I can't be consistent with. It's frustrating, and it makes remembering to do chores around the house agony. I've been trying to cope by asking for lists of things to do from my live-in bf, so I have a physical reminder of tasks to complete. I also ask for help from my headmates, and sometimes it works, but they are just as AUHD as I am and we're really sick and tired of it affecting people around us, which is why we're hoping getting medicated will help. The thing is, my bf doesn't always have the energy to write out lists for me and I don't want them to be carrying me, basically. I've asked for a permanent list that I can keep on my phone, so he doesn't have to keep reminding me, but he brushed me off.
When we first started dating, I wrote up a little manual for them, detailing how I learn and think and how my moods work and what to do in case of XYZ scenario. I know that my AUHD makes me a lot. I know it makes me a really bad and forgetful partner whos best doesn't meet the bar. I asked my bf if he could write a manual for themselves, so I can better navigate my relationship with them. They keep saying they don't have time or energy. I wanted to let them know what they were getting when they chose to date me, and they have told me that I've made it clear to them, but I don't know if they're saying that just to please me now. I don't expect them to be at 100% all the time, but I want to know that I can rely on them for the occasional reminder or push in the right direction when I lose track.
We've also been struggling with money a lot lately. I was able to finally land a part-time job, even though it's not nearly enough to cover everything. I'm looking for a second job while selling(or, trying to) my art on the side. Every month, my bf has a breakdown about not being able to cover rent. Naturally, I mirror his distress. He's told me I need to stop treating it like life or death, but they have panic attacks about the rent like clockwork every month. I don't know how else they expect me to react if they're always on the verge of a mental break every month, crying and shaking and repeating out loud "we're not going to make it. They're gonna evict us." I don't know what they expect me to say or do in that situation. I tried asking them about it and they didn't give me an answer that made sense. "Stop worrying" and "you need to be okay with me being okay eventually", which sounds like fucking nonsense.
In the past, they asked me to offer help more often. So I do, when I wake up I ask, "Anything I can help with today?" When they're distressed or upset I ask if there's anything I can do to change the environment or my actions so that they feel safer. I try cooking for them, something I enjoy doing, and I'll offer to cook for them and they'll say no.
After all this, they got angry with me because I'm sick and there was meat(that he took out) on the counter defrosting, he'd wanted me to put it away. I was sleeping and getting up to puke pure mucus, I never even knew he'd taken out the meat. He questioned me, asked if I was really that sick, and all I could do was nod. My voice is shot, my throat is sore and dry and sandpapery. I'm leaking snot by the bucketful and my eyes are puffy and gross from inflamation. They asked me why I hadn't been helping or cooking for them, and I told them. "Every time I offer, you say there's nothing I can do. I offered to cook for you these past few days and you rejected me. I'm trying to do what you asked of me, but you tell me no, so I listen to that no. What do you want from me?" And all they could say was "Sometimes I don't know."
I've never felt so fucking defeated. Six months of this, and I can't do anything right. I don't know if it's genuinely just me or if it's something with my bf. I'm questioning our compatability, I don't know what to do and I don't know how to correct things. I asked what I could do, and was told nothing, and now they're angry at me for doing nothing.
What the hell do I do? Sorry if this is long and rambly, I've stressed myself out to the point of a migraine, and I'm still sick. Any advice would be appreciated.
TLDR: My boyfriend asks me to do one thing, I do so, and he rebuffs me, then gets angry at me. What the hell do I do?

70F, white, 5'6, 150 lbs, no prescription or other drugs, no medical issues, don't smoke or drink. I got up with a cold on Sunday (2 days ago) but went ahead with trip to park. Monday really sick with sinus congestion and post-nasal drip, sore throat, no fever, itchy eyes. After a brief walk to grocery, I stayed in bed Monday and today, Tuesday, but my throat feels worse now at end of day. My throat is so painful I had to take Tylenol and aspirin to get any rest. Could it be covid? Are those home tests reliable? If I test positive at home, should I seek telehealth with doctor to get treated? I use public transportation and may have gotten infected on the bus last week.

I've never had surgery or even broken a bone so I'm taking every step of this recovery VERY slow and steady. My incision site never gave me any pain. It's irritating as hell as I can't stand anything touching my neck in daily life but I removed the bandage for the first time yesterday. No leakage, no pain, no crusty dried up blood. No signs of infection. Just a very dark incision line covered with what looks like 9-11 steristrips. Very clean.
I didn't have much trouble speaking day 1 or 2. 3-5 it got worse but wasn't bad. Swallowing is almost completely fine and I'm really looking forward to solid food again.
I'm still sleeping in my recliner using the soft collar. It's too much to lay on my back and I really don't feel comfortable on my side. It does hurt doing that. It feels like 30° angle is the happy space and I'm my head I'm scared about popping or screwing up healing by not keeping spine very straight. Am I too paranoid?
I'm up and walking to the bathroom without much hesitation as I'm not dizzy standing up anymore. I'm far from walking a lot. Still feeling tired out and sometimes just exhausted. But I'm putting in the effort of taking extra steps when going to the bathroom and back.
My arms are super weak still. Not as if I'm trying to lift anything but just raising them over my head is tedious. I reach over my head today to pull on my ear to clean them w qtips and I could feel my neck hurting pretty good as I'm putting pressure on top of my head pushing down slightly. Dr said "no bending lifting or leaning". Just the slight lean to spit out mouth wash I could feel slight pain in my neck.
Today I began doing some very small circles rolling my head around. Left to right till I feel the littlest resistance, same up and down.
Everyday feels slightly better. Throat is almost completely back to normal. Coughing was the worst pain out of everything I have done and even that has gone from a 8/9 on the pain scale (it REALLY hurt to cough) down to about a 3 in about 5 days. Today it hurts to cough but I don't hesitate anymore.
The c5-7 site is very tender to the touch. Wife still has to be very light on contact during shower. Shoulders are very stiff trying to wash other arm.
Overall, I'm still pretty tired and sometimes nearly exhausted and I don't do anything really. Watching tv. I did puke for 6 hours after the op as I had a tough time w the anesthesia (again, first time). I'm determined to make sure I heal properly and my "life situation" will allow me to take as long as I need to get back to 100% w no rush or pressure at all. I NEVER want to do this again so I feel I maybe a little behind schedule but I'm ok with it as long as it's good in the end. Then again, it's day 7 post op. How behind can I be?
Thanks in advance for any suggestions or comments. Hopefully my experience can help others with their situation as I was scared to death about this.

I keep reading on here and most people seem to have a good outcome…I’m worrying myself thinking maybe something’s wrong with mine. I had 70 units, and 2nd day had a minimal amount of microburps while yawning. Since then I have been having more and more burps, but it’s also a lot of gagging and my food coming up. Every burp tastes like puke and feels like I’m choking on water or something. It feels awful, I choke/gag most times when I eat or drink, I can’t get anything down well, even liquid stuff is stuck in my throat. I’m a paranoid anxiety ridden person, so to me all of this is extremely scary. I’ve seen people mention some regurgitating but to me this is awful. I can’t bend at all, it all comes up. Every night my throat gets extremely sore and feels like I have a million cold sores on the back of my tounge. My dr has me on an rx acid reflux med in the morning, another acid reducer pill before dinner, and then the gaviscon at night and it still is awful. I really don’t like it, BUT thankfully my stomach isn’t bloated or in pain.
Is anyone else scared of the burps? They come out of nowhere and feels like I’m gunna barf everywhere. I may be making it worse trying to hold it in. I think I subconsciously am still doing that. I choke a lot on small sips of water and it’s a nightmare having to take my pills.
Does this sound normal? Did anyone else hate this? I bounce back and fourth with wishing I never did it, and then being happy my stomach feels better.

i'm working on a novel and would like to know if anyone could tell me any improvements i could make to the first chapter and prologue
Prologue
The day had started the same way it had for the past two years. The only difference was that I was going home. The hallway was crowded with people walking to and from their classes. Everyone was crowded next to each other so the halls were making the area feel claustrophobic. All the people talking mixed with the summer heat made me feel like I was locked in a sauna. I walked with Preston to the last class we would ever have together and as usual he was smiling. I never got why he always smiled even in situations where people should be sad he still smiled. He knew what today meant for me and he tried to keep light of the situation. I kept my head down away from what was ahead of me. My mind was too clouded about returning to see my family to notice anything in front of me. I walked into another student. It felt like I had walked into a wall. I knew immediately I had walked into tree. I stumble onto the ground and the commotion around me slows down to make room for us. He turned his bulky body around and apologized profusely without saying a word even though I had walked into him. He helped me off of the ground before hurrying down the hall.
“Alexandria, are you doing okay?” Preston said he had tilted his body downward so I had to look down to look him in his eyes. The way he was standing made him look like an idiot but he didn't seem to care. The way he acted made me laugh, which caused his smile to widen.
“I'm doing fine, just got lost in my head.”
“Thinking about how you’ll leave soon,” he said
“Was it that obvious?” He was the only person I told about me being an exchange student. I came to spend high school in Newkinawa and he was the only person I ever hung out with.
“I see what you mean,” he said “Newkinawa is a beautiful place with beautiful people to live in it…myself included”
“You wish,” I say with a smile we continue walking through the hallway “I'm just not excited to go back yet”
After I say that his smile grows wider “So you will miss me after all”
“I wouldn't say that much” I responded whilst smiling.
We had made it to our last class only to see it closed with a sign labeled “Uma incident” Uma was a student known for messing with the chemistry lab and destroying school property in the process. I've never actually met her but Preston says “She's a little weird but still nice”
“Guess class is canceled for today,” Preston remarked with a smile “Wanna go out to the court till the bell rings.”
“Sure let's go” I respond
The place we ate every day was outside. It used to be a tennis court before I moved in. Now they put trees and flowers all over the place. Preston really liked the blue color of the flowers but it just never clicked for me. I look over at Preston and he's staring up at the sky. There are a number of clouds in almost enough to block the sun but it still pokes its rays through and lands on Preston's face. The clouds swim in front of the sun till they block out the sun's light. Preston faces towards me.
“I'm gonna miss you Alexandria” he says
“You know you can just call me Alex,” I replied. I start to smile again. “I'll miss you too!" He smiles toward me again as we get up to leave as the clouds start to clump together and rain slowly falls. As we're walking back to the school there's a loud tearing sound followed by screams as the ground shakes.
The ground tears itself apart as the dirt and stone erupt from the ground. The sky blackens and a pale blue light escapes the earth. Then creatures erupt from the ground in a violent ejection from the earth creating a white pillar diffusing as they reach higher in the air. Some are clawing their way out of the cracks like maggots out of a corpse. People are swept into the updraft screaming for their lives.
The creatures descend like a tidal wave and tear apart any people caught in their path. They storm out of the crack in hundreds as more cracks in the earth form. Me and Preston started running away as people were screaming behind us. A girl running next to us has her legs slashed by a creature. The monster begins to tear open her chest as she chokes on her own blood. The monster shovels her lungs and innards into its decrepit mouth. Me and Preston keep running until we're met at the entrance of the school and we catch the attention of a monster as it begins to savagely rush toward us. The monster resembles ghosts my father told me about. But this one looks monstrously horrific. It floats in the air and opens its mouth so wide it nearly replaces its entire torso; its jaws hold savage teeth each the same old gray color of its body. Its eyes glow a rotten yellow color through the dark. It stretches out its arms showing its giant hands and claws like fingers. It swipes at us leaving a giant claw mark on the door behind us but Preston ducks my body down to avoid the attack. We run around it as the monster swaps its focus to another bystander. Screaming past us. Me and Preston run into the parking lot as people scream around us. We hide next to a car.
“What the hell is happening!?” I yell to Preston. More of the creatures fly over us and swoop down to people like vultures on roadkill devouring the fleeing people.
Preston starts to breathe heavily ”we need to get out of here and someplace safer”. As we were talking one of the monster phases through the car we were hiding next to forcing us to run into the street.
“Lets go to your house till things cool down” i say to Preston through panted breaths
“Wait couldn't we head to your house instead” Preston says.
“Why would that matter your house is closer anyways” i respond
“But-” Preston is interrupted by two creatures swooping above us to grab another person. The two monsters begin to pull the person apart while he writhes in pain before having his flesh be torn in half and having his organs be devoured.
“Come on lets go!!” I say as I grab his hand and run even faster.
By the time we reach Preston's house any living person is gone. On the street are just corpses laying torn and mutilated on the roads and sidewalk. The air in the neighborhood feels cold despite the season being summer. When I walk down the street I can still hear the occasional horrific wail the monsters give off. We move closer to Preston's house and I can see him sweating. He looked more worried than before when the creatures were chasing us and he kept darting his eyes away from his home.
“Preston, are you feeling okay?” he doesn't respond to my question and keeps darting his eyes. He walks slowly behind me and as I reach for the door handle and when I touch it it feels nearly freezing. I wrap my hoodie around my hand and slowly open the door. The house is quiet so me and Preston creep further into his house. The inside is cold and damp as if we were locked in a freezer. The further we move into the house the louder a subtle chewing sound is heard.
“It sounds like rats are eating a dead cow over there” I whisper. Preston continues to stay silent behind me. We slowly walk closer towards the kitchen and the sound gets louder and louder and louder until we reach the room.
We're met with a rancid smell of vomit and blood. My blood starts to run cold and every instinct in my body is telling me to run. I can feel Preston breathing get heavier as we get closer. We turn the corner and see Preston's mom lying on the ground dead with one of the creatures hunched over slurping her intestines. The sight causes me to vomit alerting the monster to our presence. The creature turns around and its mouth turns into a mortifying grin as it flies into Preston's moms body. The corpse begins to rise and spur splashing blood over the kitchen. When the corpse stops spasming it picks itself up from the ground and with glazed over eyes it holds its intestines in its hand and gives us the same grin it did when it was outside her body. The possessed corpse lunges at me and starts to chase me around the kitchen. The body is running into the walls and cabinets spraying its blood and other loose organs around the area as I'm avoiding its assault. The corpse leans over and ejects one of its loose intestines towards me, wrapping me in it. It pulls me towards it so fast I'm flung towards the ground. The corpse limbers over to me and raises its free hand aiming for my head. The creature's deranged smile causes the corpse’s cheeks to tear apart. It places both of its bloodied and demented hands on my face and starts to press my skull into the ground. I struggle to breathe. The room starts to get dark and blood escapes my head.
Until Preston jumps on top of his mothers corpse with a kitchen knife and repeatedly stabs it in the head. The possessed body tries to shake him off but he keeps stabbing, blood gets in on his face and tears start to escape his eyes. The creature violently ejects from the corpse's mouth causing her head to nearly explode and Preston stops stabbing the body. The body falls over in a splash of blood and organs. The monster leaves phasing through the roof leaving Preston crying over his mother's body. As the blood mixes with the tears he collapses to his knees crying. I walk over and hug him as the air around us turns bitter and the chill of death leaves the room and us with it.
Chapter 1 Eclipse
It's been 2 months since the apocalypse started. We've kept ourselves alive by looting grocery stores and houses, we hide from the creatures as we have no way to fight back against them. Preston came up with the idea to call them glanter’s. He’s looking better since we left his family home but I can tell something is wrong with him that he's not telling me. Everytime I ask him about it he tells me it's no big deal. I asked him earlier today and he just told me
“don't worry about it, I'm over it” without even looking at me. Now we're walking through the street and I'm walking behind Preston, I can barely see his head past the giant bag we're both carrying on our backs we use to carry supplies. I look up at the sky and it's still pitch black except for the moon giving us any amount of light. Preston turns around to face me.
“Let's check out that house, it might have some cool stuff in it” he points to a white house to our right. The house is a two story building with steps leading to the front door. There's a generator poking out from the backyard. The driveway is empty save for a couple of dried blood stains and tire marks. It's similar to the other houses in the neighborhood except for a couple broken windows.
“Sure why not” We head over to the house and I see something shining on the side of the house in the corner of my eye. I turn my head to look at it closer but it quickly disappears before I can see it clearly.
“Probably squirrel or something” I mumble to myself. Preston walks up the stairs to the house and I walk up the steps behind him as a breeze blows past my face. Preston tries to turn the door knob but the door is locked. I start to pull out a lockpick I grabbed at the store earlier. I motion towards Preston to move out of the way as I kneel down to pick the lock. It takes me a couple of minutes to unlock the door so I walk inside the house and Preston follows behind me while closing and locking the door. The doorway of the house leads to a dark room so I take a flashlight out of my bag to illuminate the area. Were put into the living room and bookshelves are on the walls and a large TV sat in front of a large black couch with smaller chairs surrounding it. Dust is covering every surface of the room and spiderwebs litter the corners of the walls. The area smells like moth balls and there's a lack of blood anywhere nearby.
“Guess the owners got out before the Glanter’s got in, '' I say to Preston. When he doesn't respond I turn around and he's already looking further into the house. When I find him he's managed to find a flight of stairs that lead to a lower portion of the house.
“I'll check on him later,” I think to myself as I headed towards the kitchen to see if we could restock on food. I walk past a bedroom and remark on how childish it looked. The walls were painted with blue and green stripes and a bunk bed sat on the right wall. There's a chest at the foot of the bed so I walk over and lift the top off of it. The box is layered with children's toys, a multitude of dolls, bears, and figures all jut out of the box. I notice a small robot toy and inspect it in my hands.
The cold metal makes my hand shiver and the sharp body shape makes the robot bigger than my hand. There's red lining around the robot's buttons surrounded by the cold gray of the robot's “skin”. It reminds me of a toy my little brother had. My heart feels heavy as I worry about what happened to my family. If they're alive, dead, or worse…possessed. The thoughts send a chill down my spine but I push them aside for now. I put the toy in my bag and exit the bedroom.
I can see the kitchen is down the hallway so I walk down the hall and enter. The kitchen is pretty clean except for a couple of dishes in the sink and the dust. There's a table seated for 3 people in the center of the room. I start opening the cabinets in search for any food or water. There's boxes of cereal leftover on top of shelves and a mix of chip bags and cookies in neat boxes stationed in the cabinets.
“Score,” I say to myself as I begin to put the snacks into my bag. When the cabinets are empty I look inside the fridge. The inside of the fridge ran out of power so most of the food inside is rotted. There are a couple of bottles of water in the front so I shove those in my bag. There's also a bag of oranges that still seem to be healthy in the back. I grab them and toss them on the table. There's rotten sandwich meat hidden in the drawer of the fridge.it smells like a dumpster outside of a butcher shop. I wrinkle my nose at the smell. I look around the kitchen for any bread with no luck.
I continue to look through the fridge until I hear Preston scream from another room. Immediately I bolt out of the kitchen leaving my bag behind and run towards the lower part of the house. I run down the stairs and nearly trip on the steps. The stairs lead to a big room. There are posters to tv shows and movies I don't recognize. The walls are painted black and there's a bear skin rug on the floor. I notice Preston standing next to a really big TV hyperventilating. I walk over to him and ask him.
“Are you ok? What happened?”
He talks through deep breaths “I… saw a… spider.”
“What?!” I respond in confusion.
“It was really big and I had jumped at my face”
“Sure it was.” I say while laughing “Let's go upstairs there's some food in the fridge we can eat”
“Wait, I think you should check this out.” He says while pointing towards one of the walls. I grab Preston's flashlight off the floor and face it towards the wall. Hanging halfway off the wall is a large map labeled Newkiwana scavenger hunt of 76.
“I think we should take it,” Preston says “You can read a map right?”
“A little but I'm not the best at it,” I say to him “can you read a map?”
“it shouldn’t be too hard it’s mainly pictures any way I'm sure I can figure it out”
I walk over to the wall where the map is hung there are trophies covering tables and shelved in their own personal cases one of them reads “1st place 100-meter swimming competition for 1986 Zack Hemmingway” and another one reads “2nd place 100-meter swimming competition for 1989 Zack Hemmingway”
“Guess this guy really liked swimming,” Preston remarks while staring at a wall of newspaper clippings. All of them are about the same person in swimming competitions. All labeled different things like “a new record for Zack “the dolphin” Hemmingway”,
‘Zach Hemmingway our star plans for the future” all the newspapers are about this kind he has paler skin and a bulky enough build to swim pretty well. Most of the pictures have him coming out of the water in a pool, his long black hair soaked and sitting at his shoulders. Another one has him sitting at a desk over a pile of books and his hair in a knot , “vicious wipeout ends the Dolphins career”, and “ex-swim champ Zack Hemmingway found in a drunken stupor outside strip club.
“Everyone has their own hobbies I guess,” I say as I take the map off of the wall and fold it up. “Sucks what happened to Zack though” I walked over to Preston’s bag and put the rolled map in one of the pockets. I walk back up the stairs and Preston grabs his bag and follows behind me.
We make our way towards the kitchen and Preston starts looking through the fridge for anything to eat. I grab an orange from the table and throw it at his head. The fruit bounces off his head and rolls on the floor. He turns around and grabs the fruit from the floor
“Why did you throw an orange at me?”
“It's the only food we have unless you plan on eating spoiled a sandwich“ He starts to peel it while walking towards the table. We both take a seat and start to eat the oranges from the bag. He plants his feet on top of the table and bites into the fully peeled orange. I grab a water bottle from a bag and start to drink from it as Preston says.
“I saw a dvd player in that man cave downstairs we could watch a movie if it still has power”
“Sure it could be fun.” Me and Preston spend the rest of our time eating until the bag of oranges is emptied and we head back downstairs. Preston grabs the DVD player from under the table and blows the dust off the top of it; he plugs it into the wall as I plop myself onto the couch. He plugs the DVD player into the TV and sits on the recliner next to me. He presses a few buttons on the remote and the TV lights up. I squint my eyes at how bright it is. It's the most amount of light I've seen that didn't come from a flashlight. I notice there's a box filled with DVDs. I pull the box over towards me. I ruffle through the box and see movies like Silence of the Lambs, Terminator 2, and Home alone.
“Dude some of these came out just before the world turned inside out” I say to him.
“Really? Let's play one.” He responds. I toss him Terminator 2 and he puts it into the DVD player.
We spend the next couple hours watching movies and laughing together. It's some of our only moments of peace we’ve had since the end of the world and to me it's the most fun I've had yet. We're putting in the next DVD when there's a loud crash outside and the TV shuts off. Preston goes behind it to see if it's still plugged in.
“I think the generator outside is busted” i say
“It seems that way” Preston replies while backing away from the tv” i'm gonna go check it out”
“Don't worry I got it” I say as I hop out of my chair. Preston waves goodbye as I head up the stairs. I make my way back through the hallway leading to the living room and front door. I reach the door and start to turn the knob. I open the door wide as a car speeds down the street. I step out of the door to see what had happened when I hear the screech of a glanter. It cuts through the sky like an unholy opera singer. A group of them fly by and chase the car as I rush back inside the house. I slam the door shut and look through the window as I see a couple of smaller glanters grab and shake the car violently looking for the driver. They tear at it, ripping off doors and breaking the windows. The driver screams as the seats cover with blood and he's ripped out of the car as multiple smaller glanters tear and bite off parts of his body like piranha's until his body is completely devoured. I run back to the man cave to warn Preston about what had happened. I spot him laying in his chair spinning a DVD disc on his finger.
“It's not safe outside right now”
“Why not?
“There's glanter's outside, they just ate a dude in his car”
“Did they see you come inside?”
“I don't think so , they flew off before I went inside.”
“well we're not dead so I'm gonna say they didn't see you. But let's stay here for a couple more hours just to be safe”
“Sounds good i'm gonna go find the master bedroom.” I start to walk back up the stairs to the house
“ Hold on why do you get the master bedroom” Preston says while walking after me.
“Because I'm gonna find it first” I say as I start to run to find the bedroom. He chases after me in pursuit of the bedroom. Me and Preston run around the house looking for the master bedroom. We look through room after room finding closets, the garage, a bathroom and a door leading to a balcony in the back of the house. I manage to run into the bedroom and yell out to Preston.``Found it!!”
He comes walking into the room breathing heavily from the running. We both check out the room. The walls are painted a cream yellow and the bed takes up most of the room's center. The bed has burgundy sheets poking out from its bottom and a quilt with multi-colored floral designs lay sprawled out on top of it. There's a wardrobe built into the wall and a black leather couch sits comfortably on the left wall.
“Dibs on the bed” I say as I jump on top of it. I stretch out on top of the quilt and search for a comfortable part to sleep in.
“Where am I supposed to sleep then?” Preston complains
“You can sleep on the couch it looks soft enough” I respond while pointing towards the couch “I saw some spare blankets in one of the closets”
“Alright i’ll be right back” he mumbles to himself “why do i always get the couch”
“ I'll be right here if you need me,” i call after him. I sit up on the bed and start to look around the room more. I notice the entrance to the wardrobe is cracked open slightly. I hop out of the bed and grab a flashlight from my bag as I walk into the wardrobe. I turn on my flashlight and stare in awe at how many clothes are in there. The room is only half as big as the bedroom but it's still bigger than any closet I've ever had. The wardrobe is full of shirts, dresses, pants, and shoes for men and women. I immediately start to look through the shoes to see if any fit my size. I throw a pair of black high heels behind me as Preston finds me in the wardrobe. He looks around before asking me.
“What are you doing?”
“Finding a new pair of clothes to wear cause I've been wearing the same pair of jeans for waaaaay too long”
“Fair enough. Is there any guy stuff in there?”
“Yeah right there” I hook my thumb behind me to point to the other end of the closet.
“I'm sure they won't mind if we take a couple of things…they're probably dead by now anyways,” Preston says with a slight grin on his face. The way he said made me spin my head to look at him but he was already on the opposite end of the wardrobe looking at suits.
I shake away the thought and continue looking for any pair of sneakers in my size. 40 minutes pass before I walk out of the wardrobe holding a new pair of jeans and a black guns-N-roses t-shirt. I toss the clothes on top of the bed and check to see if the shower in the bathroom still works. I turn the dial and wait for a moment. The shower head chokes a little before water comes pouring out. I reach my hand under the showerhead to feel the water. The water is cold, it causes my hand to shiver when I take it out. I shake the water off and say to myself.
“Good enough” as I start to take off my old clothes and get in the shower. The cold water bounces off my skin, it sends shivers down my spine but I still get the old dirt from the last few months off of me. I step out and see a couple of dry towels hanging off of the door. I grab one and dry my body off and grab another to wrap around my head and dry my hair. I step out of the bathroom and Preston is still inside the wardrobe. I put on my new clothes while his back is turned and walk over towards him when I'm finished.
“Still haven't found anything,” I ask him
He turns around “Nothing yet, the only thing interesting was this coat.” He holds a leather coat up to me. The coat is made of black leather and has a skull covered with blue flames on the back. There's a black shirt inside the coat with a skeleton hand making a thumbs-up embroidered on the front.
“ That's pretty cool, it's better than what you're wearing right now at least” he's outfitted in a blue hoodie with holes on the chest and tears at the sleeves. He also has a shirt with a faded picture of a blue flower printed on it.
“I guess you're right” he gets up from the floor and exits the wardrobe. He lays the clothes on the couch along next to the blanket and pillow he brought into the room.
“The shower works so you can get yourself clean In there,” I say to him
“You know, a shower sounds really good right now.” He gets up from the floor and grabs a pair of pajama pants that were laying next to him. He leaves the wardrobe and enters the bathroom, closing the door behind him. After a moment the water turns on and I hop on the bed to get ready to sleep. I squirm myself into the quilt and rest my head against one of the pillows. I shut my eyes and fall asleep listening to the passive sound of the shower like rain on a car.
I'm in a void. It feels like I'm standing in a puddle of water that reaches to my knees. I wade my way forward looking around for anything in the darkness. In the distance I can see 3 figures l. I moved closer to them and their silhouettes get clearer. I realize they are my dad and brothers. I start to run towards them kicking up water behind me until something grabs my leg. It pulls down violently forcing me under the water without a breath of air. I kick at the thing grabbing me until something grabs my other leg. I look down and see two glanter's each with a monstrous smile on their faces. They stare back at me and one of them tugs my leg harder than before and tears it off of my body. The water around me turns red as the glanter laugh's. The other smiles wider as it starts to fling me around the water forcing any air left in my lungs to be forced out as I scream in pain. The glanter throws me away and I can see my family slowly fade into the distance as I'm flown away.
I struggle to swim back to where I was, one of my legs is missing and the other is broken. The glanter's find me again and I try to get to the surface to escape them. I'm flapping my arms in any attempt to escape as one of the glanter's flies in front of me and grabs my arm. I look at the monster with tears in my eyes as it bites my arm and tears my body away from it. It flings my body away and with my remaining arm I clutch the wound as the water floods into my body leaving me in the void I started in. I look around and the glanter's seem to have left. I turn behind me and see my family again, this time I'm closer than before.
I grit my teeth and drag my body towards them slowly as I leave a trail of blood and tears behind me. I finally reach my family and grab one of my father's shoes. I stare up and he looks at me. His stare causes me to feel cold as a grotesque smile grows on his face. I stare in shock as my brothers each have the same look as my father.
I shoot up from my sleep panting heavily in a cold sweat.
“It was just a dream..just a dream…just a dream” I look at my hands as tears fall into them. I look around the room and see Preston sleeping peacefully on the couch. The room feels frozen in place as a chill runs down my spine. I get out of the bed and walk out of the bedroom. I make my way through the dark hallway and find the entrance to the balcony I saw earlier. I creak open the screen door and head outside. The Balcony is pretty large, about the size of the kitchen in the house. There are some chairs knocked over next to a table and I pick one up to sit on it. I look out into the expanse of the neighborhood, houses lined up next to each other, dozens broken apart by roads, and dead bodies scattered across the roads.
I look up in the sky and sit back in the chair. The sky looks empty except for the moon giving this world its only source of light. Without the moon, we’d be left in darkness. It hangs in the sky alone, no stars, no clouds, nothing but itself, and the void of the sky. I think back about the dream I had. My dad and my brother's all dead and possessed and then they kill me. I start to tear up thinking about it. I try to wipe away the tears but it’s no use. I'm too scared for my family. I don't know where they are if they're alive if they're worried about me I don't know anything! I start to quietly cry into my hands. I don't know how long I'm sitting there until I feel a hand on my shoulder. I turn my head to face it and I see Preston. He was smiling and looking at me. I turn away to wipe my tears and he walks next to me.
“I heard you sneaking out of the bedroom so I followed you to see where you were going.” he says “but that's not my question.” he pauses and looks at me “my question is what’s got you feeling so down?” he leans over the railing of the balcony
“It's nothing, I just came out here to clear my head.” I say as more tears escape from my eyes in big slow drops that ride down the sides of my face.
“if you don't feel like telling me you don't have to but i'll be here if you ever change your mind”. He looks up at the moon before turning to face me and his smile widens “I'll always be here with you…trust me I'm not going anywhere”
I stare up at him and wipe away my tears as a smile grows on my face to match his. I get up and stare over the balcony with him. “So where are we heading next?” I say to him, Preston pulls the map we got from the man cave downstairs out from his pocket.
“After I got out of the shower I decided to take a look at the map for anything interesting we could see.”
“Ok did you find anything?” i ask
“I did,” he points at a spot on the right of the map. “We should head to the museum”
“I didn't want to go to a museum before the apocalypse why would i want to go now?'' I ask him.
“Well the best part of museums is the cool stuff right”
“Yeah what about it”
“The only problem is that you could only look at the fossils and armor but you could never take them.”
“So you want to rob a museum?” Prestons eyes light up at the question
“Exactly they might have a really cool sword I could use, or I could sharpen a dinosaur tooth and use that as a weapon, there might be a cursed shield that can summon the dead to fight for you. This opportunity is too good to pass up. We need to go!”
“That does seem pretty cool but wouldn't carrying that stuff weigh us down. What if a glanter is chasing us and we can't run fast enough because of the stuff we took from the museum.”
“We’ll only take things that are light. Even then I could just block the glanter with my newly acquired 2000 year old shield.”
“Fair enough we can go in a couple hours” I yawn and stretch out my arms. “Cause I'm feeling way too tired to walk all the way over there right now.”
“Alright i'm heading back to my couch and THEN we’ll head out to the museum” he leaves the balcony and heads back to the master bedroom leaving me alone on the balcony.
“Thanks Preston I'm not leaving either” I say into the sky. I turn around and walk back inside the house, closing the balcony door behind me. I walk back into the bedroom and Preston is hunched over and holding a flashlight looking at the map. He’s drawing lines through roads and marking X’s in different areas.
“What are the X’s for?” i ask him
“They’re places that glanter’s usually stay around. I'm marking them off so we remember not to go through them, or at least be more cautious.”
“Cool. Did you find where we are right now?” He points to an area where the lines all converge out of.
“Right around here is where the neighborhood ends. So if we follow this path we can make it to the museum in one piece” I pat him on the back and take the map from his hands.
“Get some sleep Preston, we have a full day tomorrow” he grins to himself before laying down on the couch. I put the map back into my bag and hop on the bed to get to sleep. I cover my body in the quilt and roll over facing away from Preston as he falls asleep. I nestle myself into the bed and slowly fall asleep to get ready for the next day.
I'm awoken by Preston shaking the bed I'm sleeping on. My eyes open and the room is foggy, I wipe away the sleep from my eyes and focus my attention towards Preston. He's practically jumping out of his skin with excitement, he's already fully dressed for the trip and shaking the bed with a wide smile on his face.
“Ok ok i'm up the air feels heavy as a groggy feeling fills my body. I wipe my eyes and the room starts to clear up. I turn to face Preston. He's still shaking my bed to wake me up, he’s already fully dressed and nearly jumping out of his skin in excitement.
“Ok ok, i'm up you can stop shaking the bed” i say
“Then get up we’ve got a long walk ahead of us” he says as he stops shaking the mattress. He grabs the map from my bag and points to one of the red lines.
“We're gonna follow this way to the museum. We’ll move past the hotel around the ice skating rink and around the park. We’ll mainly stick to walking through the streets, we might have to go rooftop hopping to avoid any glanter’s if we see them but i'm sure we won’t reach that point.” he explains
“Wait, wait, wait, why are avoiding the skating rink and the park” i ask
“ everytime we go near the park there's weird noises and light coming out of it”
“And why can't we go to the ice skating rink?”
“I didn't think it would be important”
“It couldn't hurt to check it out at least”
“Fine we could make a detour”
“Ok and how do you plan on getting on top of roofs?”
“I'm sure we'll figure it out when we get to it”
“Ok man as long as you’re sure '' I yawn and step out of the bed. Preston starts to put the map in his bag. I walk into the bathroom with my clothes and change out of my pajamas. Minutes later I walk out and see Preston sitting on the couch twiddling his thumbs.
“Finally you're out” he smiles at me before handing me my bag and slinging it over his shoulder. We took a last look inside the kitchen to see if we missed anything. Afterwards we leave for the outside. The cold air bites at my face but Preston walks down the stairs, his face buried in the map. I jog to catch up to him as we both head into the street.
“Hey Preston, could I see the map?”
“Sure” he hands over the map and continues walking. I look at the map and the numerous lines drawn on roads. I look at the corner of the map and notice a small map key with numerous symbols for different areas like a library, school, hospital, and more. There's even a way to tell how far away each location is. The text reads “1 inch=5 miles” I quickly count how far we are from the museum.
“Dude this museum is like 100 miles away.”
“Yep it'll be a long walk, it'll take us a while to get there”
“Did you plan on us walking there the whole time?”
“We might find bikes or something.” he pauses “well i did think we would walk the whole way”
“This is gonna take us weeks to get there!”
“Did you have anything else planned?”
“Well…i guess not but we should still try to find some bikes or something”
“Ok if we see any way to travel faster we’ll take it”
“Alright cool” I hand him the map back and he folds it back up and puts it in his bag. We walk further until we leave the gated neighborhood we started in. Preston takes the map back out and looks at it before he turns right and continues walking. I follow him staring forward at the expanse of the road. The outside of the neighborhood is surrounded by roads all leading to different parts of Newkinawa. We walk past a sign that reads “Coretown 20 miles ahead” I nudge Preston towards the sign and he checks the map again.
“Yep, the museum’s in Coretown. Would you believe the residents were pretty proud of it. Should be a fun place to explore” he says
“Yeah but it’ll take us a million years to get there.” i complain
“Lighten up, I'm sure it will be worth it”. We continue walking down the road slowly making our way to Coretown.

I tested positive for Covid this weekend. Had all the Classic symptoms like body aches, headaches, sore throat, runny / blocked nose, cough, loss of taste and smell and absolute exhaustion like I’ve been hit by a truck. Even going to the bathroom is winding me. Now I’m starting to feel a bit better although still exhausted but have the worst stomachaches. And bloated and gassy. Does anyone else have tummy problems too?

im 14m and she homeschools me (forcefully)
why
why must my mom be so childish seriously
if anything I say goes against her “christian and conspiracy beliefs” to a minute degree it’s immediately shot down
and i get called a liberal who would murder babies
nice
im sick of this can i just have a normal conversation without being told I’m going to hell and having my mom act like the smartest person on earth with her methods of using colloidal silver oil for sore throats, getting food that isn’t bioengineers, no vaccines (ofc i haven’t been vaxxed), her claiming my nana died of leukemia because of the vaccine, that the firmament prevents rockets from leaving earth, that rainbows are the firmament refracting light, that basically any food gives you cancer, that homeschool is better because public schools “tell you that 200 gender freaks are okay and they brainwash you and tell you God is bad“, that the higher-ups are all pedophiles and out to get us (are we really that important mom), that she’s educating people on ”end-times” (wow so impressive mhm), that gravity is a theory and density is the real gravity, that trump will save us all (or that he’s the antichrist she kinda changes between opinions), that linen sheets will heal any sickness, that most medicine is just big pharma lying to us, that a cure for cancer exists but they’re hiding it to keep income through hospitals, and all this other bullshit that I can’t really remember right now. and guess what, flat earth!
she’s never really a comforting person to be around because she’s so fucking childish. one time when I was like 10 years old my brother accidentally hit her toe lightly and she started crying and saying to my brother “you hurt meeee” and crying more in front of him before stopping when he was like 11. idk if im a dick but it just doesn’t sound like how at at the time 56 year old woman would react.
sometimes I genuinely feel like I’m her parent trying to get her to calm down and stuff and it sucks. I have no friends because I never see anyone due to being homeschooled. CPS wouldnt do shit either. I have no relatives who would let me stay with them. I just stay in my room all day and go to the gym 5 days a week because I want to feel like im not that much of a worthless parasite at least.
my dad also just acts cold he doesnt really talk to anyone. he’s always in a bad mood. he‘ll say stuff like “dreadful” or “miserable” while he’s in a good mood. he says he doesn’t want to act like his abusive dad (my grandpa I never met hes dead now) yet he still acts mad. He’s punched stuff in front of me when mad and he gave me a panic attack one time because he kept yelling at the top of his lungs at me because I didn’t do mu schoolwork. I was hyperventilating and crying uncontrollably and he interpreted it as me trying to scare him like I was mad or something so he just yelled louder until he left eventually. Then my mom, who showed no real compassion but just stand there calmly, took my books and showed me everythinf I hadn’t done yet. Eventually I got up full of adrenaline and ran to my closet door which I smashed into from the speed and opened it and got in once again hitting the wall inside and leaving a dent in it from the force. Then I held the doorknob shut until my mom finally started crying because she “didnt want me to be scaredmof them“ when she couldn’t get the door open because of my strength. She also threatened to get my dad in the room again to open the door forcefully (he’s stronger than me, he’s about 6’ 1” and 230lbs so he’s pretty strong.) i think my dad made me enter flight or fight for the first time which isn’t a very good memory (this lasted about 90 minutes)
idk why I have to always keep up a face it’s so annoying. I can’t truly trust anyone anymore. I always feel like someone is against me or secretly wants to get me or hates me or beat the shit out of me or kill me. I want to actually be able to trust someone and cry for hours in their arms without them getting mad at me or not being okay with it. shot that’ll never happen though. i wish my life was normal (according to both my parents it‘s “better than ”normal”!” im done im finished
im sick

im 14m and she homeschools me (forcefully)
why
why must my mom be so childish seriously
if anything I say goes against her “christian and conspiracy beliefs” to a minute degree it’s immediately shot down
and i get called a liberal who would murder babies
nice
im sick of this can i just have a normal conversation without being told I’m going to hell and having my mom act like the smartest person on earth with her methods of using colloidal silver oil for sore throats, getting food that isn’t bioengineers, no vaccines (ofc i haven’t been vaxxed), her claiming my nana died of leukemia because of the vaccine, that the firmament prevents rockets from leaving earth, that rainbows are the firmament refracting light, that basically any food gives you cancer, that homeschool is better because public schools “tell you that 200 gender freaks are okay and they brainwash you and tell you God is bad“, that the higher-ups are all pedophiles and out to get us (are we really that important mom), that she’s educating people on ”end-times” (wow so impressive mhm), that gravity is a theory and density is the real gravity, that trump will save us all (or that he’s the antichrist she kinda changes between opinions), that linen sheets will heal any sickness, that most medicine is just big pharma lying to us, that a cure for cancer exists but they’re hiding it to keep income through hospitals, and all this other bullshit that I can’t really remember right now. and guess what, flat earth!
she’s never really a comforting person to be around because she’s so fucking childish. one time when I was like 10 years old my brother accidentally hit her toe lightly and she started crying and saying to my brother “you hurt meeee” and crying more in front of him before stopping when he was like 11. idk if im a dick but it just doesn’t sound like how at at the time 56 year old woman would react.
sometimes I genuinely feel like I’m her parent trying to get her to calm down and stuff and it sucks. I have no friends because I never see anyone due to being homeschooled. CPS wouldnt do shit either. I have no relatives who would let me stay with them. I just stay in my room all day and go to the gym 5 days a week because I want to feel like im not that much of a worthless parasite at least.
my dad also just acts cold he doesnt really talk to anyone. he’s always in a bad mood. he‘ll say stuff like “dreadful” or “miserable” while he’s in a good mood. he says he doesn’t want to act like his abusive dad (my grandpa I never met hes dead now) yet he still acts mad. He’s punched stuff in front of me when mad and he gave me a panic attack one time because he kept yelling at the top of his lungs at me because I didn’t do mu schoolwork. I was hyperventilating and crying uncontrollably and he interpreted it as me trying to scare him like I was mad or something so he just yelled louder until he left eventually. Then my mom, who showed no real compassion but just stand there calmly, took my books and showed me everythinf I hadn’t done yet. Eventually I got up full of adrenaline and ran to my closet door which I smashed into from the speed and opened it and got in once again hitting the wall inside and leaving a dent in it from the force. Then I held the doorknob shut until my mom finally started crying because she “didnt want me to be scaredmof them“ when she couldn’t get the door open because of my strength. She also threatened to get my dad in the room again to open the door forcefully (he’s stronger than me, he’s about 6’ 1” and 230lbs so he’s pretty strong.) i think my dad made me enter flight or fight for the first time which isn’t a very good memory (this lasted about 90 minutes)
idk why I have to always keep up a face it’s so annoying. I can’t truly trust anyone anymore. I always feel like someone is against me or secretly wants to get me or hates me or beat the shit out of me or kill me. I want to actually be able to trust someone and cry for hours in their arms without them getting mad at me or not being okay with it. shot that’ll never happen though. i wish my life was normal (according to both my parents it‘s “better than ”normal”!” im done im finished
im sick

Edgiscript: Kimchi's a little under the weather, so I'll tell you that this is where you can find info on monetization An Introdu ction To The Book That Is Me : ASMRScriptHaven (reddit.com) and here's my library Masterlist for edgiscript : ASMRScriptHaven (reddit.com) . That's all.
Kimchi: HAAAAAAAA!!!!
Edgiscript: EEEAAAAAAGGGHHHHH!!!! Kimchi? What the hell?
Kimchi: It's not that easy to make that interesting and fun, is it?
Edgiscript: I... was... so concerned about your health, that I... couldn't... spend any time to... make this fun.
Kimchi: Awwwwww. That's so sweet. Utter BS, but still sweet.
------------------------------------------------
Part 6: [F4M] Play Time - 6 out of Checkmate [Kimchi Cat-Girl Speaker] [Hubby Human Listener] [Playing Board/Bored Games] [Rickety-Ass Stairs] [Colonel/Kernel] [You Sank My Battleship] [Give Me Back My Piece] : ASMRScriptHaven (reddit.com)
-------------------------------------------------

Part 7

Kimchi: (Singsong voice.) Hubbyyyyyyyy? Huuuuuubbyyyyyyyy? I’m coming to geeeeet youuuuuuuu.
(Snickers and giggles.) Ooh, you are so good at this. I love playing hide and seek with you so much. The park has so many good hiding spots, but out here, you don’t have the advantage of having everything smell like you. So… I can follow… your scent… to… HERE!
Hah, haaaaaah. I see you. You can run, and you can laugh, I love your laugh, but you can’t hide anymore. I’m almost on you. I’m going to POUNCE…
(Kimchi crashes in some leaves.)
Hubby, what are you doing? You came back to get me. You should have used that opportunity to get away. Now the hunt is over. That’s no fun.
(Pause.)
Well, yeah, I missed. That’s what I meant. I missed, so why didn’t you keep running?
(Pause.)
Yeah, I suppose I’ve never missed before, but, you know, it happens. Why didn’t you run?
(Pause.)
Awwww, you were worried about me. Did you think I’d hurt myself? Well, thanks, hubby, but you don’t have to worry. Cats are invulnerable. I’ve got nine lives, remember? That means I can’t get hurt.
(Pause.)
Does too mean that.
(Pause.)
That’s right, there’s no point arguing with me. Why would you try to correct me when I’m right?
(Pause.)
What d’ya mean, I don’t look so good?
(Sounding hurt.) I thought you thought I was pretty.
(Pause.)
(Brightening up.) Oh, you do think I’m beautiful. You meant I look a little off.
In what way?
(Pause.)
Why would you think that, silly? And why are there two of you all of a suddenly? All of a suggen. Sudden. Whatever.
(Pause.)
No, I didn’t hit my head when I landed. What would I have hit my head on. There’s nothing but leaves here. I just… (Sneezes.)
Sorry, hubby. That came out of nowhere. I just… (Sneezes.)
No, I don’t know. Maybe allergies.
(Pause.)
Nope, never had allergies before, but I can’t think of another reason why I might… (A few coughs.)
(Pause.)
Whaaaaaaat? Sick? No way. Cats don’t get sick. That’s a silly human thing.
(Pause.)
Cats do not get sick. I told you, cats are invulnertable.
(Pause.)
Right, that’s what I said. Invulnerable. Geez, hubby. You’re thinking I’m sick, but you’re the one not hearing things properly.
Now, if you’ll stop being so silly and doing things like spinning in circles, we could get back to our game.
(Pause.)
Don’t tell me you’re not spinning. You and the whole forest is doing it. I’m actually impressed. How did you manage to get the whole park to… ohhhhhh.
(Kimchi faints. When she wakes up, she’s in bed. She sounds a little groggy.)
Hubby? What happened? Why am I in bed? Where did the forest go?
(Pause.)
Yes, the park. The grass, the trees, the leaves. Where did it go?
(Pause.)
I did not pass out. I can fall asleep very quickly, but only when I’m trying. And I wasn’t trying.
I wanted to catch you. That’s our Saturday game. I get to hunt you in the morning and then I have the rest of the day to make you happy after I catch you.
I love being the hunter and you love being the prey. I love our Saturdays. You don’t have to go to work. I get to play with you all day. Now what happened?
(Pause.)
No, no, hubby. I think you’re confused. I carry you when I catch you. You don’t carry me. You couldn’t have carried me all the way home.
(Pause.)
No, hubby, it’s not that I think you’re not strong enough, it’s just that it doesn’t happen that way. I catch you. I carry you. I make you happy. Do you see the relationship here? Me to you. You’re getting it backwards. Now let me get up and…
(Kimchi tries to get up but stops right away. Sore, painful moans. Kimchi starts to sound a little groggier and now sounds a little stuffed up as well. If you want to cough at times, go ahead when you think it works.)
Ohhhh. Ohhh, OOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH. My body hurts. Why does my body hurt?
What did you do to me? What did I do to me? Wait, did the forest do this to me? I didn’t know it could do that. I thought it liked me. What’s going on?
(Pause.)
A fever? Pfft. Cats don’t get fevers.
(Pause.)
No, I’m not dizzy, and I don’t have body aches. I’m a cat. We’re invulnershuble. Invernatable. Invlurt… We can’t get sick.
(Pause.)
Of course I can say the word. I’ve said it before, many times. You’ve heard me say it.
(Pause.)
I… just… don’t want to say it right now. That’s all. It has nothing to do with the fact that I’m dizzy and achy all over.
(Pause.)
Oh, drat. You tricked me. Ok, fine, I’m a little dizzy, but that’s probably just because I crashed into those leaves.
(Pause.)
Yes, those leaves. There were a lot of them. And they were really big. They ganged up on me. Why does the park not like me all of a sudden?
(Pause.)
(Kimchi sounds even more stuffed up now.) No, my nose isn’t starting to run. Legs run. Noses sniff. Hubby, I think you’re the one who’s sick if you forgot that.
(Pause.)
Oh, you mean I’m leaking. Yeah, you’re right. What’s this coming out of my nose?
(Pause.)
Ewwww, that’s disgusting. How could that be?
(Pause.)
What’s that? A Kleenex? What do I do with it?
(Pause.)
Ok. (Blows nose.) WOW! Hubby, look at this. That came out of me. What’s going on?
And why am I naked with the air conditioner on? It’s freezing in here.
(Pause.)
What? I can’t be in my pajamas and under the covers. It’s so cold, I…
Huh. I guess you’re right. Wow. How did I not know that? And why am I so cold?
Wait. What’s that? (Distrustful.) Hubbyyyyy, what is that?
(Pause.)
Yes, that filthy, disgusting, vomit inducing, nasty goop that smells like you pulled it out of the garbage disposal. And why are you pouring some of it into a spoon?
(Pause.)
You can’t be serious. There is no way I’m swallowing that.
(Pause.)
You humans do it all the time? What, in the literal hell, is wrong with you? No wonder cats are superior in every way when you’re sabotaging yourself as a species by eating that filth.
(Pause.)
You can call it medicine and good for me if you want, but I know better. And it doesn’t matter. I’m not sick.
(Kimchi gets a little panicky.)
Hubby? Where are you going?
(Pause.)
(Quietly, afraid to admit the truth.) Well… yeah… I guess some chicken soup does sound kinda good right now. I suppose I’d like some. But only because I always like your chicken soup. It’s nummy.
If… if you wanted to make me some, I guess I’d eat it.
(Pause)
(Panicky.) Hubby? Wait. Don’t… don’t go.
(Pause.)
Yes, I know the ingredients and the stove aren’t in here, but… I don’t want you to go.
(Pause.)
I know you’re not leaving the apartment, but I don’t want you to go… anywhere. I… don’t want you to leave me.
(Pause.)
No, please. I’m…
(Sweetly, tenderly, frightened.) I’m scared. Hubby… I’m scared. I’ve never felt like this before. I’m… sick. That means I could… I could die, right? What if you left, even for a minute, and I needed you. I think that… if you go… even for a little bit… I might…
(Long pause. Hubby walks to the dresser and opens a drawer to get something.)
Hubby, what is that? Why are you counting to ten?
(Pause.)
You’re tying a bow on my wrist.
(Pause.)
Yes, it is pretty. I like the color very much. You make a nice bow. I like it.
(Pause.)
What? There was no hunt.
(Pause.)
Oh, so that’s what the counting meant. You started a game, didn’t you? You caught me. You tied me… with this bow. And now you have to make me happy.
(Pause.)
That’s right. Those are the rules.
(Pause. From now on, Kimchi sounds more and more tired, and gets quieter and quieter until she falls asleep.)
Yes, please. Climb into bed with me and hold me.
(Pause.)
Thank you, hubby. You feel so warm. And your arms around me makes me feel safe.
I don’t like being sick. It makes me scared. I don’t want to die, hubby. I don’t want you to go away.
(Pause.)
Ok. I guess you’re right. I can’t die with you here now because you have to make me happy, and being apart from you would make me sad.
(Pause.)
Yes, that’s right. You have to make me happy. Those are the rules. And you are, hubby. You are making me very happy right now.
(Pause.)
Oh, yes, hubby. Stroking my hair feels so good. I always like it when you pet me.
(Pause.)
And scritch my ears. Just like that.
(Pause.)
Yes, I like laying on your chest. Is it ok if I squeeze you?
(Pause.)
Yes, that would make me happy.
(Pause.)
That’s good. If I hold on tighter, you’re even warmer. How is that possible? Am I squeezing warmth out of you?
(Pause.)
Hubby, thank you. You make me not scared. I love you, hubby. I love you. I’m so glad you’re mine.
(Pause.)
No, I’m not yours. You’re mine.
(Pause.)
Ok. I’m yours too.
(Pause.)
Yes, that makes me happy.
(Pause.)
No, I’m not going to fall asleep. I just like laying here with you.
(Pause.)
So what if my eyes are closed. That means I’m comfortable.
(Pause.)
Yes, I am a good hunter. I love to catch you and make you happy, because I love you.
But… I always wondered why you liked being the prey so much. Now I know. This is nice. You’re nice.
I like you taking care of me. I love you, hubby. I… love…
(Kimchi falls asleep.)
Part 8 next.

And a sore throat. It would be really helpful if I could have cough drops. Can I have some or do I need to take my trays out and then brush after?
I’m kind of miserable.
Thanks!

Female 34 YOA Fever of 102.4 Back pain Headache Fatigue Green/yellow snot
My 16 MO daughter caught a bug from daycare which presented as fatigue and a low grade fever on Sunday but she already appears to have fully recovered but my wife has really been hit since this morning. Started gradually with a bad sore throat (which has actually improved) but now these other symptoms. She is really worried about her temp, should we go to ER?

I'm so overwhelmed. By everything. Just existing is so exhausting. I have no motivation to do anything. My thoughts are so scattered and my brain is so dysfunctional that it really feels like I CAN'T do anything but go through the motions of what life is supposed to be and suffer, and my brain is so fucked up I can't even find the words to describe what I feel like.
I don't want to take medication. I'd rather be fucking dead than be a slave to the same shit that got me in this predicament in the first place. Having pills shoved down my throat from such an early age. I'm tired of labcoats playing chemistry set with my brain. Even with the pills my quality of life will be so far diminished from the average person's that there's no point. I am a genetic dead end and God has abandoned me. Nothing makes sense. I look in the mirror and a stranger's eyes peer back at me.
I'm a lizard in human skin. I dance like a marionette to please people and then back in the box I go. All alone. At this point I don't care if people will mourn me, the effect it will have on their lives. I'm ready to check out and I'm already one foot out the door. Nobody even cares. I'm lumped in with so many melodramatic fucking losers wearing "depression" like a badge of honor that nobody ever will take me seriously. I hope I go to Hell. Burning in Hell is the better alternative to serving that fucking dictator in the sky who made me like this.

Hey everyone! 23F here and I’ve been trying to start exercising again. I’m 5’2” and 117lbs. I have no known health issues at the moment other than asthma, and I was diagnosed with vitamin D deficiency. I want to start exercising to improve my anxiety, OCD, and depression. I’ve been dealing with mild to pretty bad fatigue before exercise and have a hunch it might be because I’m so sedentary. My current vitamin D levels are 31 ng/mL and optimal is around 40-80 ng/mL.
My average steps daily are anywhere from 1000-3000 a day. I’ve been trying to get more active and hit at least 5000 to 6000 daily but it feels so taxing on my body. I don’t know if I’m “doing too much” straight off the bat, but it feels like at my young age and at my weight I should be able to do it just fine. But basically, I’ll do an inclined treadmill fast-paced walk at the gym for 20 minutes and feel so tired after. Like enough that I have to fight back a nap or staying in bed all day after. I also get sore very quickly after a workout. My legs felt sore after that 20 minute treadmill workout, and I did 15 squats today and felt very sore basically immediately.
I’ve gotten a lot of tests done. Right now, I have a sleep study and and endoscopy and colonoscopy in order for July. I’ve gotten tons of blood tests to figure out the cause of my fatigue and basically everything has come back 100% perfect. Like LOTS for inflammation in my body and autoimmune blood test markers. So, I’m just trying to figure out if anyone else has been in my shoes prior and how long it took for them to improve their strength, endurance, and stamina. I want to push through it but I’m scared to do so, since I don’t know if it’s really normal or not or if anyone has gone through the same.
Thanks!

This is SO funny, I am reposting it and will repost it every once in a while.
From:
https://www.reddit.com/tifu/comments/2vdwtw/tifu_by_drinking_an_entire_bottle_of_louisiana/

I have had a number of job interviews recently that went poorly and did not result in securing employment.
I started to think I needed to do something during an interview to really stand out, be impressive, unique, and highly memorable. I thought it could be risky, but might work out.
I came up with the following idea: After concluding the interview, after the hand shakes, etc, when leaving the room stop, turn around, and say "There's one more thing you need to know about me."
Then pull out a bottle of hot sauce, down the entire bottle, slam it onto the ground and say "I can handle the heat." Nod confidently, leave the room.
Boom.
I imagined that they would be really impressed and wowed by such a performance.
Well it didn't pan out like I thought it would. It was only a small bottle of hot sauce, I figured it would be no big deal to actually do. I should have tested at home first, but I didn't.
I was nervous as a bitch-ass during the interview, but I was determined to follow through with the plan.
So I started exactly as described above. I was leaving, I turned around, maybe not with as much swagger as I'd imagined in my head, and I declared "There's one more thing you need to know about me."
I pulled out the hot sauce bottle, almost dropped it, and started to open the bottle. In my head it was all one quick confident motion, like an electric Indiana Jones, but instead I fumbled around and had a tough time getting it open. It felt like a nightmarish eternity but was probably only about 20 seconds. Enough time for one of the interviewers to ask me what I was doing.
I didn't answer directly. Instead, after I got the bottle open, I repeated "There's one more thing you need to know about me." (But stuttering.)
Then I guzzled down the entire bottle of hot sauce. I instantly regretted it. My mouth and throat felt like lava was swirling around inside me. I immediately started to gag and loudly cough, I was crying involuntarily. Tears hardcore streaming down my face. I was sweating like a terrible fool.
I desperately tried to scream "I can handle the heat" but just kept coughing before I could get anything out.
The interviewers were all standing up looking at me in horror and confusion.
A few seconds before I threw up all over the floor I knew it would happen, but I tried to hold it back. I couldn't.
I threw up all over the floor. It hurt as much on the way out as it did on the way in, if not more so. The vomit felt like flaming barbed wire shredding its way through my neck.
I should mention a disturbing amount of fiery mucus was also leaking out of my nose uncontrollably.
After I finished throwing up I could not bear to look at the interviewers. I hoarsely mumbled an apology and started to stumble as quickly as possible out the door.
I have never been more shamed in my life.
I didn't get the job.