Game sites that aren't blocked at school

I'd originally posted in another thread, and some of the commentors ( u/one85fortunes and u/Jeciew) had asked for elaboration as to the incidents that happened in my house.
I'll try to fill in as much as possible. This will probably be ridiculously long, so strap in.
My SO and I moved into this house a little under 2 years ago. It's an average looking rancher, built in 1990. We're the second owners of the house. The original owner was an older man, who'd cared for his wife after she had a stroke. She ultimately passed away (not in the house, but in hospice) and being in his late 70's he'd decided to move to Florida. We met him briefly during one of the inspections, and he wasn't creepy or anything. Nothing in the house seemed off. No signs of satanic rituals, etc. All jokes aside, I add these details because I assume some of these questions will come up.
There was a hurricane the night we moved in. Rushing back and forth from the AirBnB to get situated with our two cats that first night was stressful to say the least. We basically throw down an air mattress, got out the litterbox, cat food, and other basics and then passed the hell out.
When I woke up the next morning my cat Oscar was dead. As he was only 7, and not knowing if a danger existed that would harm his brother Max or us, I rushed and had an autopsy done. The vet said he basically threw a clot, probably because of the stress of the move. I miss him, he was a hell of cool cat. I think he's still around - his spirit or whatever, and I am almost positive he visits and plays with Max some nights. Just seeing Max start chasing (literally nothing) around, the way they used to chase each other. I'm probably crazy but I feel better believing it.
One of the first weird things that occurred was a few weeks in. I was in my office building some shelves. An idiot proof kit, with hardware in bags numbered, you open them depending on the step you're on. I was on the last step, which involved hammering in these four feet.. each one similar to a giant thumbtack. Just big enough to keep the shelf system from scratching up the floor. I hammered in the first 3, and the 4th was just gone. I stood up, searched the room. Searched the hallway (no clue how it could have moved, I was sitting immobile on the floor but who knows). It's nowhere. I check Max, he's a Maine Coon so maybe it got stuck in his hair. After an hour of tearing apart most of the house, I give up and stack some quarters where that foot would have gone. Told my SO to keep an eye out for it. We then found it 3 days later on the top shelf of my coat closet, under a ballcap. It's about this point I should mention it's just the two of us, no one else lives in the house, at least not full time. We do have a room over the garage that one of the kids calls home when she's not in college. As this was all around early October, she was away at school.
We'd start hearing things. The amount of times (to this day) we'll rush into one of each other's rooms only to find neither of us called each other, but one of us at that time had distinctly heard someone yelling for us, well it's not even scary anymore just annoying. Maybe the entity wants me to lose some weight and get my steps in *shrug*. Other times we'll hear crashing sounds. In the early days, with boxes and things scattered and being unpacked, I figured the cat just knocked something over. I'd go check and find nothing amiss.
Lights would start being on in rooms we hadn't used. Again, we chalked a lot of this up to confusion, or carelessness. It's a new house, neither of us had our routines yet, it was all a bit of a hot, sleepless mess, and I can't always swear I didn't go into that back bedroom and maybe turn the light on while on autopilot (even though I totally didn't). I'm a big fan of horror (post history proves that) and I don't spook easily. I'm also pretty pragmatic and realistic, so I'll try to find a rational reason for most things before jumping to the paranormal and metaphysical concepts.
Eating dinner one night we heard a weird noise, and we got up to investigate to find the bathtub running at full blast. Around this time we'd also find oddities like pictures on the walls being askew. Overall things started escalating. My SO and I promised to each other, on penalty of ending the relationship, that neither was pranking the other. That pact holds to this day.
At this point in the game, I'd started looking into metaphysical things that I could do to help. I'm talking amethyst and obsidian pieces in the house, saging, stuff like that. I honestly don't believe in it, but I also don't NOT believe, so what can it hurt. It didn't really do much that I could tell. Things continued to happen.
Twice in the same day, at vastly separate times and in different bathrooms, we both experienced an incredibly loud pounding in the attic over the bathroom as we were doing our business. I assume the ghost doesn't like whatever we ate that week. My bad, homie.
The locks had been changed at this point. I started looking throughout the house, wondering if someone was phrogging. I've seen a few horror movies about it. Nothing out of the ordinary. The attic has two entrances, one needs a ladder from the hallway, and the other is through an opening in the eaves, which you can get to from the FROG (Finished Room Over Garage). I stacked things in front of that eaves door, just to make sure nothing was coming and going. I did come to the realization that the attic was FULL of stuff from the previous owner. Luggage, clothes, random stuff. I still haven't cleaned it out, so maybe something up there is tied to an entity. No clue.
I've never felt anything malicious from the entity/spirit/energy/demon/whatever. My other half is terrified of it. Came home from the store one day to find the last rites crucifix in the bedroom turned sideways and half opened. Also felt every hair on my body stand up when I went in the room. The hair-on-end happens often when activity is spiked, I can't tell if it's energy literally raising my hair, or just me being creeped out.
I went to check the aforementioned stacked items in the FROG one night to find that all the LED strips the girl had put up were blazing red. She hadn't been home in weeks and never uses that color. I was up there just a few days prior and all the lights were off.
Halloween was fun. Giving out candy, talking with the cul-de-sac neighbors. One cute kid, maybe 4 years old turns to look to his right (my garage) and says you have a goblin in your garage. We didn't have any decorations on that side of the house. I'm sure just random kids being weird kids, right?
I have a habit of being flippant, and I started talking to the entity. SO also tried it once. At this point we'd started hearing breathing in the dark sometimes. One night she's in the hall, cleaning the cat litter. She felt something behind her, heard breathing. She calmly said "I'm busy right now, please leave me alone". The feelings and sensations instantly left, then all the doors in the hallway slammed shut. We both started wearing amethyst and obsidian jewelry, just in case.
I noticed movies I'd leave up on my computer (I watch stuff while I'm working) would be playing, or finished when I know I had them paused. I thought maybe if you are a ghost you're bored af, so I spoke to the ghost and setup a dozen books in the back bedroom. A mixture of my stuff and my SO's, not knowing what the thing might be into. I'm nothing if not a gracious host. The next day one of the books was turned upside down and opened, as if being put down after being read. I kept more books out but it never happened again.
For Xmas we had 6 different mini-nativity scenes throughout the house (yes, she has a problem lol). We found various pieces from the nativity scenes moved into scenes they didn't come with. We also had these little xmas gnomes that we sat on the curtain rods, we found one sitting upright in the middle of the couch one morning, a good 12 feet away from where it was before.
One night we were sitting out front having a smoke, came inside and heard music. There was a snowglobe that was playing music. It was an old heirloom, she'd forgotten it also could wind up and make music.
A box of kleenex that we keep on the living room end table was found in the garage one day.
One night, she sends me a video while I'm out - We have a first gen Alexa, that was playing Bad Habits by Ed Sheeran. She came inside from having a smoke and recorded it blasting away. I had unplugged it earlier that day when our new toaster arrived. FYI, first gens dont' have battery backups.
Another night we came back inside to find one of our butcher knives on the kitchen floor, instead of in the knife block.
One evening while getting ready for bed I noticed an earring on my night stand, it was part of a set her grandmother had left her, the other part was buried in a box under some clothes in a drawer.
One night I woke up to hearing knocking at the front door. I could see through the glass it was a decoration we had hung outside, beating against the door. I opened the door expecting to see a storm brewing but the night was completely calm, the trees weren't even swaying. No wind whatsoever.
The previous house owners smoked in the house at one point, that much we know. Weirdly, sometimes when you go into the back bathroom it'll smell like someone is actively smoking a cigarette.
There's been a crazy amount of times we've been outside and see movement, what appears to be a person in a window out of the corner of our eye. Friends and family who visit have also noticed this kind of stuff.
Things go missing, and reappear in random places far too often.
So those are most of the big things. I'll try to pre-emptively answer the common questions.

• No, we don't have cameras inside. We've considered it. Feels like a lot of work to maybe catch something moving. Having video proof of any of this isn't going to sway a non-believer either (anything can be faked on photo/video imo). That said I do have photos and videos of some of the events (the alexa, the music box, the butcher knife).
  
• The neighbors filled me in a bit about the familial history of the home. The father worked hard, his kids were drug addict shitbags who trashed the place and partied a lot. No one died in the house that I know of, nor were there any other weird activities. Could they have gotten drunk and sacrificed a cat on a ouija board? Sure, I dunno.
  
• We considered getting the church to bless the home, but she was raised very catholic and I'm more of an agnostic mutt so I haven't jumped on board the idea. Again, I don't believe but don't NOT believe when it comes to most spirituality, mysticism and religion.
  
• I did look to see if there were any paranormal investigators nearby, and it doesn't look like there are any local ones. The activity in the house is so intermittent that I can't justify offering someone to come down when there are months that go by with nothing, then a bunch of stuff for a week straight. I thought maybe it was cyclic, tied to an event, hell even the phase of the moon, but so far I've got no clue. I also really have no interest in paying someone to investigate.
  

Last thing that might be worth mentioning, my SO is 95% positive her grandmother was a witch. The bonafide, keeps their baby teeth hidden away in a box so you can't be cursed, type witch. She often dreams of her when things start acting up in the home. It was HER jewlery mentioned before, and HER last rites crucifix. I don't know if that changes things or not, I've done some reasearch but I honestly learn more from episodes of Supernatural than what I find on the internet most days lol
If you've gotten this far thanks for reading, I'd love to hear your thoughts.

Olá! It's me! I'm Rickle Pick! Hello everyone!
So, I’ve been listening to some stories about Neckbeards and Kevins, as well as some Legbeards and Kevinas (Is that the correct term??). Well, most of the times I listen to those stories, I am reminded of some people I used to deal with in school. Specifically, this time, the tale of a guy, who I’ll name Roger Bacon for reasons soon to be explained. Sorry for any grammar errors, eu falo português! I also don't really know the posting rules here, so I'll just post it and see how it goes lol
This prologue is more of a compilation of stories that I think is needed before we get to the main shenanigans and awkward situations this guy put himself AND me into. If this generates any interest, I will post more specific tales of this weirdo! Long time lurker, first time poster, english is definitely not my first language and the whole shebang. I also never wrote a text this large, so go easy on me!
THE LIST:
Well, I guess it’s usual to make a list of people that appear in those stories, so I’ll make one just for you!
Me: Your basic musician-type nerdy theater kid white guy! Tall, thin with medium-light brown hair. At the time, I usually wore a leather jacket and sometimes a hat (not a fedora, a Chaplin hat. Also, where I live, hats are an acceptable attire choice lol). I kinda looked like the Once-ler from Lorax. At this time, I had just failed my second year of high school because of… honestly just lack of effort, mixed with undiagnosed ADHD and a bit of lacking in the ol’ confidence and self-respect department. At the time, I also was physically incapable of saying no and had a crippling fear of disappointing people.
Roger Bacon: 168 centimeters (or 5,5ft for the uncivilized) of pure muscle! Or at least he thought it was that way. In reality, he did have some muscles but was kinda chubby and flaccid. Not FAT fat, but athletic fat (???). He was mixed, light skinned, had shaved short curly hair, no beard (except for the inside beard) and his face was a special kind of oval, besides having a, "chiseled jaw". He always smelled like he had just gotten out of a day-long brawl with a french cologne wearing burrito. He wasn't an usual neckbeard, but he was a huge attention whore. Thought too much of himself, as we say here in Brazil: “Promised too much, delivered nothing at all.” His moto was: “Dude, I think she’s into me!”
For now, these are the characters, as the focus is to introduce you all to Roger Bacon as a person.
With the list over, let us get to the story.
FEBUARY 2018:
The year of 2018 started pretty badly for me. I had just been held back from 10th grade, had no friends and didn’t really know anyone. As most people know, high school in Brazil is quite different from America, as we start school in febuary and we share the same class with the same people all day, excluding language classes and extra-curriculum activities. This meant that, for the foreseeable future, I was alone. On the first day of school, I shyly sat on the last desk on the far right corner of the room, as I scanned my classroom to see what I was dealing with. A few groups of people sitting together, talking and greeting their friends, some loners reading or playing on their phones. The artsy girl drawing a beauriful woman on the white board. Some guy drawing a penis right beside her. Perfect balance. A normal classroom.
Another difference between our school systems is that we don’t really have clicks based on like Jocks or Nerds or Pretty Girls, it’s mostly people who connected in childhood or matched personalities, instead of connecting through roles and interests within the school. Not saying either one is better, just different. And yeah, the bullying situation is just as bad. I was bullied for my whole middle school and through first year of high school, and made a very specific group of low profile friends. So when I failed sophomore year I thought to myself “Screw it, if I’m going to be held back, that’s at least a second chance for me to grow an acceptable social life.”
All this elucidates how intimidating it could be for someone to join a new classroom full of mostly new faces. If you were unable to make a friend, you’d pretty much be on your own for the whole year unless an already formed group “adopted” you. So my mindset was to at least try and meet new people.
Well, have you ever said “I’m gonna do this thing I’ve never done before!” And got the worst possible circunstance you could get at the very first attempt? Welp, that’s just what happened. My strategy was to start small, and go talk to only one person at first, and then try to interact with a few of the groups as that was a bit intimidating (fun fact: we call “clicks “panelinhas”, spelled “pah-neh-lin-ias”, wich means “little pans”, because, you know, they’re closed groups, like a closed… pan. Idk, anyway), so I went up to this guy in front of me, and that guy was Roger Bacon.
He was almost lying on his chair, on a cool guy pose while messing around on his phone. He was also wearing a black sports tank top with a grey opened sweatshirt and the standard uniform wine-red shorts that were mandatory in our school, which made him look like a short and jelly version of Rocky balboa mixed with Kick Buttowski.
In real life, my name and his started with sequential letters, and because of this, we would sit near each other for the whole year, so I guessed he’d be the best person to interact with. I also KINDA knew him because we had basketball training after class in like 2015 and I went to the same church as him, in which I befriended his brother, Kevin, slightly, but didn’t have much contact with him because he had already graduated (I have some stories about basketball and church so tell me if yall wanna read them lol). I approached and gestured for him to take of his headphones (They were extremely loud, so I could recognize he was listening to the song In The End by Linkin Park).
Me: Hey! Aren’t you Roger? You’re Kevin’s brother, right?
RB, trying to sound stoic: “Oh, hey Rick. Yeah, it’s me… fortunately for you.”
Me: “What do you mean?”
RB explained: “Well, I’m the cool brother! Kevin was lame, and also had no friends.”
Me: “Isn’t he in a band with [insert band members]? They seem to be his friends…
RB: “They might look nice, but they’re all assholes. Don’t let them fool you! I’m the nice brother, Kevin is a dipshit.
To elucidate you: that band he said was made of assholes was the Worship band of the church we went to. It was also the worship band that I occasionally played the piano with.
I said, jokingly: “Guess I’m an asshole then! Because, ya know, I play with them more often than not”
RB: “No man, it’s just them. They’re just so infuriating! They never let me participate!”
Me: “Wow, that’s weird… I mean, I didn’t know you were a musician too! What instrument do you play?”
RB: “I play the drums, piano, guitar, bass and I also sing. But Kevin keeps me out because he wants to be the 'star brother'!”
I could tell he got a little heated, and went silent for a little while. I decided not to mention the band or his brother in his presence, 'cause ya know, that was pretty awkward lol.
I remember thinking to myself “This guy’s kinda weird”, because his brother was one of the nicest people I had ever known, and he also didn’t have the say on who played on the band, the worship leader did. I thought about confronting Roger with this, but I didn’t want to abandon my quest of finding a friend. And also, he seemed chill at first, if not a little insecure.
I was a little uncomfortable with this line of conversation, so I opted to change the subject. We talked a bit more about me having been held back, and he went on about how he was really good at math and chemistry, and how he could help me with my school stuff.
I was glad to have someone to help me, and even more, someone who apparently liked the stuff I liked. I remembered what he was listening to, so I commented on it and asked which song was his favorite, and we talked about Linkin Park for a bit. He said “In The End” was his favorite song, and then I mentioned I was a huge Linkin Park fan. He told me he was a big fan as well, but as we talked about it, it became a bit fishy. He never specifically said anything and just kinda repeated what I said. It became clear after a while that “In The End” was, in fact, virtually the only song he knew from that band.
That was the first time I noticed something strange, but only in hindsight, as at the time I just thought he really wanted to make a human connection. I remember thinking he was just excited to know someone who was open to talking to him, so I didn’t think anything of it.
Also, not everyone memorizes this stuff, and maybe he did only remember one song, for whatever reason, so I let that pass. I only felt necessary to include this information because it was, at least in some way, the first lie that Roger told me, a little sample, if you will, of what’s to come.
After we talked for a while, mostly catching up on our lives, the bell rung and our first actual class had begun, and I had the first-hand experience of this guy’s sense of humor. The teacher walked into the classroom and introduced himself as the new Geography teacher, and started a power point presentation about some of the subjects we’d be covering that year, saying “Please pay attention to this class, as you’ll need to know how our schedule will work”. Roger looked back and said “Huh, I guess this class is useless for you then, being held back and all, hahah”, which made everyone look at me and just kinda stare like I should say something, and he kept repeating the joke to anyone that showed any reaction besides just staring, adding “Amirite? Huh? Amirite?”.
I was kinda salty about this, but my people pleasing peapod brain couldn’t handle letting it show, so I just laughed and said nothing. I guessed it was a poorly thought out joke at first, but then Roger proceeded to make the same comment on every single one of the opening classes we had for both of the introductory days. There were 12 of them. He did it every time. Every. Single. Time. Sometimes he repeated it even louder, as if he didn’t think people heard it, because no-one was laughing.
“Ok”, I said to myself, “He didn’t mean to make fun of me, he’s just a little overexcited and probably is trying to make a connection and help me get acquainted to our classmates.”
Either way, I was very uncomfortable and annoyed.
Thankfully, this came to a halt when he was practically thrown out of the Literature class for interrupting the teacher mid-sentence while she talked about how important the first month of class would be for our comprehension of the whole subject. He made the joke four times. FOUR TIMES. I was beginning to think that I made a mistake, but well, the mistake was already made, at least I can try and understand him a bit, before judging.
The rest of the week went by and he didn’t get any better, but I got kinda used to it. In fact, I actually enjoyed having conversations with him at recess, when we could talk a bit more freely. And, as all things in life tend to do, it got weirder. Weirder in the sense that as we spoke more and more, I noticed a bit of a concerning pattern: every time I shared an experience I had, he’d share a cooler and more awesome almost equal experience back.
Some light examples:
I told him I went hiking for 2-3 kilometers on a trail by the beach. Then he smirked and said he went hiking for “at least 7 kilometers on a deserted beach that only his father’s company’s employees had access to and he saw a Gorilla. There are no gorillas in Brazil. Maybe in zoos, I guess, but definitely no gorillas.
I told him I was kinda sad because I had just ended a “thing” with a girl from my old grade. He “proudly” said he’s been dumped by his ex, Laura, after they dated for 11 months and made out aaaallll the time after school, and he even saw her “lady parts” once!”.
And then he went on to describe that shit for like 3 straight classes, adding more and more to the story every chance he had to speak, providing me with my daily dose of cringe in tiny bits of uncomfortable information at a time! Like a sporadic cringe snack! Sninge! Crack? Probably Crack.
ANYWAYS
There was also the time I told him the story of how I became best friends with a guy because we got into a fight in P.E.. We were arguing about some nonsense and he wanted to fight, so after he socked me on my stomach, I cheaply kicked him in the face so hard I almost sprained my ankle and then we started laughing (because I guess sometimes that’s all it takes). Phillip is my best friend for almost 10 years now.
Roger puffed up his soap dish chest went on for at least 2 classes worth of time about how he “beat up his last bully and broke both of his arms, and almost went to prison, but his dad is a lawyer and bailed him out”. Dude was 16, and I don’t think he’d need to be bailed out, but okay… He was, in fact, very badass.
Those are all approximations of actual stories he told me, because my ADHD memory is shit, but you get the gist of it.
My days were filled with endless stories filled with absolute bullshit, like a Gary Stu from a dying rpg campaign. (I have a story about a DnD game he participated in, but that’s for another time!)
Roger, not content with lying to me about anecdotal facts about his past that could be true but were almost certainly mostly bullshit (if not entirely), had a tendency to just negate reality when presented with facts in certain situations.
And example of this situation is the time we were doing a group assignment and a girl at least 3 meters in front of him dropped her pencil and he just kinda threw himself on the ground, picked it up and said “Here you go, Lana!”. She said “Thanks Roger!”, barely turning around and carried on with the assignment. Roger, then, turned to me with a sleek shit feasting smirk on his face and said:
RB: “Dude, do you think she’s into me??”
I contained a ridiculing laughter just in time to realize he was dead serious.
I said “I don’t know man… Doesn’t seem like it to me, but sure I guess.”
RB then straight up asked ME to go talk to her and get HIM her number. When I asked why shouldn’t he do it, he said it was “the wingman’s job to get the number of the girl” so that he wouldn’t “look weak for asking”
I said I’d do it, cause I genuinely wanted to see if he was right about her liking him (I hadn’t really understood the dynamics of the classroom, so I actually had no idea if he was actually right, just a gut feeling that yeah, he probably wasn’t).
I went up to her and asked for her number, explaining it was Roger who was interested in her and, as I pulled out my raging 2014’s Sony XPeria, I was swiftly interrupted by her delicately saying “Sorry! I have a boyfriend.” (She said the boyfriend part out loud, and stared at Roger)
I said “Oh, ok, sorry to bother ya!” and, as I was starting to walk back, I noticed that she turned back and glared at Roger. Later that day her boyfriend texted him, telling him that “He’s got to stop asking her out, and next time, if he wants to get rejected, he should come do it himself” He called him a moron. And then they both blocked him.
Well, that was embarrassing.
Despite having been turned down (for the 6th time now, I’d come to find out), Roger still maintained that she was “totally into him”, and it wasn’t just Lana. Any time he had even the smallest interaction with any girl, he’d say that they’re “probably into him”, or that “they made out at a party, but she was drunk and probably won’t remember”, or that they “sent him nudes last year but he’s already deleted them because he’s a good person, with morals”.
This went on for a while and, after about a month, Roger begun to dial down the crazy stories about how he’s a “badass and he gets all the girls but he’s single because he’s too good for them”. Until I started seeing a girl from another church I started going to. I met Janice () at the churches youth group, and we talked the whole time afterwards about lots of stuff. This name’s given because of her insanely similar laughter and demeanor of Janice from Friends. We clicked well and I was very interested in her, but my ADHD ass forgot to get her number, and remembered it only when she had already left.
When I told Roger, he laughed and said “I had just cockblocked myself” and that I’d “probably missed my only chance of banging a girl ever”. I was bummed, but clarified I didn’t really want to have sex before marriage or at least before making an emotional connection (I had just then begun to go to church, so I didn’t really get the rules, so it was more of a personal choice I always had in mind when thinking about dating. Also I met her at church so wtf).
He said “that was dumb” and, “even though he was a virgin, he’d dance the Devil’s Tango with the first chick he had the chance to”
“What about Laura?”, I asked. His face went from a confident smirk to an almost sad expression, and he blankly replied: “She didn’t want to, but I tried anyway at times. I even got a blowie once!” I let it go because I was very tired, as Mondays are hell on earth.
A few classes later, I went up to him and reminded him of our conversation and asked:
I said “Ooookay, but what about all those girls you told me were all over you? Didn’t they want to have some bum bum times with you??”
He was taken by surprise by this, and was visibly trying so hard to think of an answer for at least 15 seconds. He mumbled “Well…”, and like just left. Like he got up in the middle of the class, and walked away. Well that was weird!
He got back and I didn’t pry, thinking he had some kind of trauma, and I tried to change the subject.
I say “tried” because instead we were suddenly interrupted by a girl asking me if I was Rick. I didn’t know her or how she had materialized beside our desks, but later I found out that that girl’s name was Mary. She had blue eyes and was smiling mischievously, and I answered “Yup, that’s me”. She then giggled and said that “Anna wanted to make out with me after class”. Me and Roger were both very much taken aback by this, and I immediately thought to myself that this could only be some type of dare or prank (which it probably was), and was about to try and respond with the first witty joke that popped up in my monkey brain when, without missing a beat, Roger said “Rick’s already seeing someone!”. Mary was visibly surprised and said “Oh, you have a girlfriend??” with a look of disbelief on her face. Ouch. I explained that I wouldn’t say I do, I just liked a girl from church and we’re going to see a movie with some friends on Saturday, and that either way it was a pass on the making out sesh! Mary said “Oh, okay!” and started to walk back to her desk. I was about to make a joke and say that Anna could probably do better than me, when Roger interjected:
RB: “I’d like a making out sesh if she’s interested!”
Mary looked back with a visible “Lol, ew no” expression and just said: “I’m sure you would, Roger!”, turned away and sat down, laughing with her friends when she got to her desk.
Roger turned to me and said:
RB: “Dude, do you think she’s into me?”
This cycle repeated once in a while, so I’m not gonna tell you all of the situations that I felt like shaking him and trying to wake him up like Woody does to Buzz Lightyear in Toy Story. Exhausting, right?
Another thing Roger tended to brag about was that he did Martial Arts. Specifically, Kung Fu (Wushu). I would come to find out that, in the year before, he made a big scene to tell everyone in class that he’d just started Kung-Fu classes and, when no-one payed attention, he started a habit of punching the wall beside his desk, audibly making “hmpft” noises. When anyone asked why, he’d say he was training, and that his Sensei (Not shifu, he actually said sensei) had asked him to do that to strengthen his fists so he could harness all the strength he had, so one day he could put a hole through a wall with his fists.
He would also punch the school’s fireproof doors because, if you didn’t know, they dent pretty easily, and he would show me and tell me to bask at his strength and ability. That until I said I’d give it a try. He told me not to, because “I wasn’t trained” and “it could really hurt my hand”. I punched the door. It made a dent.
Roger said it was beginners luck and that he’s just a good teacher. I told him I really didn’t even make an effort to pay attention, the metal was just bendy and soft. Roger never talked about it again, and started only punching walls. For that, he would feel superior because, yeah I ain’t doing that. There were consequences for his wall punching habits, but I’ll address that some other time.
The last thing I’ll say about him for now is how clueless Roger was, how much he thought of himself and how he treated everyone else like they should (and would) respecting for what he told them, and not for what he showed them.
(I plan on doing another part eventually, with the story of how his disconnection with reality, lies, schemes and generally narcissist behavior eventually exploded back into his face.)
As a last bit of exposition of our circumstances, there’s an important part of our school life that fueled Roger’s social life’s demise.
Pranking was a big part of my class’ culture. There were also some people in my classroom who were bullied. The thing is: the bullies actually made fun of literally everyone else, which made it very hard to figure out if you were considered a target or just a colleague. They’d mess with people’s stuff, tie backpacks to the windows and hide pencil cases, but they would also do it to their own group.
Essentially, the only way to differentiate those who they considered normal schoolmates from those who were bullied was the frequency of the pranks and their demeanor in general towards those people. They would apologize for the pranks, ask to make up for it, buy you lunch, make jokes, try to laugh with you. I swear some of those guys were politicians in the making. Luckily, was very good friends with one of the guys in that group, I’ll call him Turkey, who was also held back a few years before me, and he liked my sister, so I was mostly safe.
Roger, on the other hand, THOUGHT he was one of the pranksters. Every time someone pranked him or anyone else, he would laugh knowingly, like he was in on the joke the whole time, and try to make jokes, only to further humiliate himself. And they would capitalize on that as hard as they could.
You see, Roger liked to portray himself as the “Mysterious-Badass-Quiet-Protagonist-Take-No-Shit-From-Anyone-Mr.-Steal-Yo-Girl” guy. This combo of personality substitutes was the recipe for the downfall of his popularity, and the start of the longest lasting pranks I’ve ever seen in my life, which will come if yall want another post. That prank is also the reason I named him Roger Bacon.
Because he was so into Math and Science (and into himself too lol) he also always wanted to look like the smartest guy in the room. The problem is that, as our first semester went by, it became clear that he wasn’t as good as he hyped himself up to be. Shocker, right? This was proven to be true when we were doing a chemistry group test, and I was paired with him and Anna, and we needed to calculate some entropies or whatever. He made a point of telling us to do all of the “easy ones”, and he would take on the more complicated questions.
The thing is, he was trying really hard to look like a genius, to maybe impress Anna, so every time he made a calculation, he would roll his eyes up and kinda vibrate a little. I guess he wanted to look like a genius mathematics robot, but instead he looked like he was trying to imitate an autistic person having a small stroke. I didn’t mind the Good Doctor amateur impersonation, because at least it looked like he knew what he was doing. Unfortunately, it really just looked like he knew what he was doing.
Each easy question of the test was worth 1 point, and there were 4 of them, and there were 3 hard questions worth 2 points each. We got a 4/10 on that test, and lo and behold, the only questions we got right were the ones me and Anna worked on. We were a bit pissed, not gonna lie.
Until the last time we spoke, Roger still blames Anna for his complete failure at this test for, in his words, distracting him because she was obviously into him.
But that’s just Roger, I guess!
I've got A LOT of stories about Roger and other neckbeards I've encountered, and I can't wait to tell them!
Until then, thanks for reading, and have a good one yall!

Belive me I've tried to get better. I've tried talking to my parents but they wouldn't understand, I'd just get yelled at. My problems aren't as bad as a LOT of others, I have friends and a supportive family, but im not feeling well. No matter how much I try it seems like everytime something minorly good happens, something 100x worse happens to weigh it out. The exact thing that could go wrong in the moment, happens. It can be involving other people too, like when I'm about to leave the house and I just got my mom out of a bad mood, but my sister spills a drink and it just gets back to the start. I never win in sports, school, video games. Absolutely anything that's bad, happens to me. Everyone else seems like they're always having the best time, and I'm always sinking down into a deeper hole. Other people are always getting what they want, And sometimes I have thoughts of killing people in horrible ways because of my anger and hatred just boiling up inside(for example, someone can call me skinny, and ill act out ripping their jaw open with brute fore in the shower that night☹️👎). I cant rely on religion, because SOMETHING has to be doing this to me, right? So God hates me, nothing good is happening and I'm just all around losing. Its been like this for 3 years now. Simple tasks and daily routines are starting to feel harder and I'm losing the energy to try. I probably sound stupid, and if no one's willing to help that's fine focus on you, but this is my last cry for help before I officially stop trying, and become an absolute bum. I don't know what to do, Please help me.

Hey y'all...so this has to be one of the craziest things that's ever happened to me and I really wanted to share it. Buckle up cause it's a long one...sorry in advance lol.
It started in 2019 I (26f but back then 21) met this dude (23m at the time) on kik from the Netherlands, let's call him...butthole. So, me and butthole hit it off, we're vibing, we're flirting, all that shebang.
We decide to date online long distance (cause I still lived in America at the time) so we text every day and we call a lot and it's just sooo nice. He was really sweet and nice to me. Well, August of that year I went on a trip to Ireland and got SA'd while there we'd been dating for 3 months at this point.
Once I got back home I finally worked up the nerve to tell him cause I legit had PTSD from that shit and when I did, he got mad at me. He accused me of cheating...I was like wtf?? So we broke up and went no contact and that was that.
Until
2020 it's lockdown....my diddly dumbass was lonely and bored and decided to text him! Like girl wtf was I thinkin? So I text him and he ends up apologizing for accusing me of cheating. He realized he was wrong and just like that, we went back to vibing and flirting. We're also making low key plans for me to visit him once lockdown is lifted too. After a few days of this I'm thinkin we're gonna get back together. But he says to me "I have something to tell you and you're gonna get mad at me".
And I'm like....ok? I didn't even know what to think like no clue what it could be (cause I'm dumb lol) And he goes "so I'm actually living with a girl who is (and I quote) officially my girlfriend". Oh man I was pissed and really hurt...like that fucking hypocrite!! So he goes on to explain they'd been dating for 2 Y E A R S!!
Anyway, so I'm dumb and was so in love and had no self esteem and thought he was the best I could get so I ask if he wants to leave her. He was like yea but we have a house together and I recently lost my job because of the pandemic so it'd screw us both over if I left now. I should've run right then and there but nooooo.
So I was like "you want to leave her and be with me right? Like, you will right?" And he said yes, I want to be with you, I'll leave if I can, blah blah blah." After a couple weeks of us acting coupley, sexting, sending pics, flirting and shit I woke up one day and realized, he's never gonna leave her for me. Ever. So....I decided I have to find this girl and tell her cause this is bullshit.
Problem is...I know nothing about her and apparently barely anything about him. He wouldn't tell me her name or anything. And he told me back in 2019 that he doesn't have social media (I should've known that was a lie cause who doesn't at least have facebook?) So I have nothing except his first and last name (later I find out he lied about how his last name is spelled and he gave me his nickname instead of his actual first name!...bro is a pathological liar I s2g!)
I tried looking for him on social media (obviously I didn't find him) I would try to ask about her name, but like in a really chill way, obviously he wouldn't tell me. I got desperate and googled Netherlands chat sites, and got on one and legit asked each person if they knew butthole mcbuttface from Rotterdam...I knew it was a long shot but I had to try.
That ended in a flop (well not entirely but I'll get back to that later) So then I get real crafty. I decide that I'm gonna play an adult fun game with him. I ask a question, he answers it truthfully and he gets a "reward". So I made sure to write out all the questions, starting with super innocent ones and I put the really revealing ones later cause I figured he'd be thinking with his other head at that point so he'd answer anything I asked.
We didn't do this over video call, we texted and I sent videos doing the thing (that way I could write down his answers) I did a lot of shit I'm not proud of. But I got the answers I needed. So I went all FBI and I got the specific area he lived from him and I ended up finding roughly where his house is, I was hoping I could find her name somewhere with that but it was a bust.
I tried to use the other answers to find stuff but I got nothing. I then decide to confront him over one of the answers (his brother's name) cause I legit thought he lied, it didn't sound like a name a Dutch person would have. He told me it was the truth. It's a really weird name for someone in the Netherlands so I looked him up on Facebook and I FOUND THAT BITCH!
That's how I realized he gave me the wrong spelling of his last name. So through his brother I found butthole's page and through butthole's page I found her!!! It took me weeks to find her! I was so shooketh! I couldn't believe I actually did it! So I go and look through her profile for a bit and I see that a few days before we played that game he FUCKIN PROPOSED TO HER!!!
I literally screamed when I saw that...I was so pissed and upset that he did that to her..... So I take a shit ton of screenshots and send her a message basically telling her everything. And she responded like "omg thank you for telling me". Like she wasn't upset at me or anything and that made me so sad. We chit chatted a bit and she was telling me all this shit about how she heard he was only with her for her money and blah blah blah...and she asked me for a few more specific screenshots which I gladly sent.
Then she said that she was at work and would confront him when she was home. I was in full support mode and was like I'm here for you and I'm so sorry this happened. And she was in support mode and she said she was sorry it happened to me too. So we exchange numbers and start texting. Later she texted me saying that she was off work and she was almost home and I wished her luck. At that point I texted him saying something like bye bitch good luck and blocked him lol.
So then I waited to hear from her...I check an hour later and saw that she blocked my number....I was so confused. I genuinely wish I could know what he said to her cause y'all...she ended up staying with him and getting married.I saw the pics on Facebook lol but yea....she could do so much better like...idk how this gremlin lookin ass bitch pulled 2 girls cause he's ugly inside and out. Idk if they're still together. I haven't looked in on them since I saw the wedding pics.
So yea, that's my story...but I said I would come back to the chat site not being a complete flop. I met a dude on there and we became friends and he introduced me to a guy who is now my boyfriend of almost 4 years and I ended up moving to the Netherlands to be with him lolol....I'm nowhere near where butthole lives so I'll never run into him but yea thanks for reading!

It's been over a year now since. Highschool sweethearts, love of my life since I was 16 and he was 18. Even then I knew there were red flags, but he was an 18 year old and I told him exactly what I wanted and he agreed. We were good for the most part, at least I thought so. He always had his inconsiderate moments but Wes work it out - or rather I'd just move by because I wanted to nurture the relationship.
He broke up with me several times before. Once because of health thing I couldn't control. Another because he was supposedly having job and money issues he wanted to figure out alone. Another because I moved in with him and his grandma after a house fire and he got tired of me being in the same room as him when I didn't move out quick enough because my family struggled to find a home. There were a couple other occasions I know I missed. Each time I let him go with love and wished him the best, but told him I was sure he was my person. He always came back. Despite the fact that for years he wanted to sow his oats, explore, see what was out there. I encouraged him to do what he needed but he assured me that he wanted to be with me.
I knew when he was having doubts. He'd get hot and cold, grow distant at odd times. He liked sexy pictures of girls online - and when I saw him doing it I worked up the courage to say that it made me uncomfortable and he was defensive at first before apologizing. He did it again a year later and had no remorse. And used the opportunity to tell me he'd been thinking about breaking up with me around my birthday. He admitted that to me on other occasions too. He pushed me to take a job in another state because he knew it would be an excuse to leave me. And he always discussed doubts about our relationship with other people, one of those people being one of my best friends since I was in middle school.
He broke up with me this last time a month before our 8 year anniversary. He said he didn't want to live together and struggled to see a future. He wanted to get numbers and show up his friends with no game. He said he didn't know who could satisfy him emotionally, mentally, sexually (except maybe a threesome ((his words))). But he wanted to be single. Unlike the last time he announced it to our friend group in a prewritten message, changed his status, removed our pictures, and went out to the bar two days later and asked for a mutual friend's number.
He did a lot to continue to hurt me. Including trying to come back out of jealousy.

• asked for the mutual friends number
• liked my mom's provocative pictures on Instagram
• he didn't remember the year I was born
• he only treated me like a friend in group settings
• he never knew how to comfort me
• didn't defend me to his grandma who called me a gold digger even though I never asked him for a penny
• always used me to gauge his feelings
• got a 21 year old girlfriend
• called me crying to say he could only envision a future with me, but then said he actually wanted to be with the new girlfriend and that he actually didn't feel anything romantic for me despite all he said during our 6 hour in person talk
• hit on his "best friends" ex and got nudes from another one

He wants to come back, and I've been able to tell him no despite him saying everything he knows I want to hear. But I know I dragged out the pain for a year. He finally blocked me after I wasn't responding how he wanted. And I know it's for the best and I should have blocked him myself but I love him so much. I'm grieving all over again. I just want to rant I suppose. Or get reassurance. Or be told I'm stupid and need to get over it.
Sorry this was so long. I left out so many things. Just feeling really anxious today and wanted to get it out.

-Option offenses received a ton of attention (new animations, tons of efficiency and speed) *could be OP*
-You will notice when you use a 2 star player against a 5 star player (5 star players apparently feel different)
-Wear & Tear matters a ton in longer games. You'll be able to tell by how he plays if a player isn't receiving proper rest.
-Online Dynasty will not be cross play *this* year. It is something they want in the future
-Gameplay and the core dynasty experience was a big focus for this game
-Mascot mode likely NOT in the game this year
-Deep dives coming soon *possibly this week*
-Madden and CFB 25 on same engine, but the developer have done a lot to make CFB 25 feel different than Madden.
-CFB 25 will play much faster than Madden
-Many new animations for CFB 25. "Plenty of new catch animations"
-POSSIBLE THAT HELMETS COULD GET KNOCKED OFF
-Not a full ESPN license. Just the broadcasters like Kirk and Chris. NO ESPN SCOREBUG
-The easier schools will be really easy to play against if you are a bigger school even on the harder difficulties. (example used is Michigan vs Buffalo)
-No mode like The Yard from Madden in CFB 25
-He reiterates that this game will not be barebones. It is treated as a "foundation building" game.
-Dynasty and RTG will have a ton of replay value
-A LOT OF EFFORT INTO HOW THE OFFSEASON WORKS IN DYNASTY
-No BCS option for Dynasty. Playoff only
-It's all about becoming a "Huge Star" in RTG. NIL plays a role in the mode
-College Gameday not really in the game. Will be a preshow, but not really College Gameday
-Custom Playbooks
-Recruiting is deeper
-Teambuilder is basic, but enough for people to be happy
-More detailed substitutions
-A lot of different equipment compared to madden
-Many different crowd reactions
-Full gameplay footage by early June
-There will be a ticker at the bottom of the screen
-FIRST TRUE CURRENT GEN FOOTBALL GAME FROM EA. GROUND UP CURRENT GEN
-Will come to PC with future releases
-Blocking gameplay looked good.

So, I've gotten to a point where designing special abilities (feats, edges, merits, talents, whatever you want to call them) is one of the only things left to do in my project. My main road block at the moment is balancing the character options for in-combat and out-of-combat situations.
As a preface, the main goals for my game are simulation (but not necessarily crunch), immersion, and player choice and freedom. I'd like to facilitate pulpy adventure in an internally consistent fictional world, and I'd like story to be a secondary thing that emerges out of the action in the fiction, driven by the player characters and the choices they make, rather than storytelling being the primary goal of the rules and gameplay. I don't like mechanics that are too dissociated or feel more like improv prompts than tools. I do, however, think that the best way to achieve this internal consistency is to rely on common sense and a shared understanding of the game world, using the rules as a sort of "objective basis" or foundation, rather than having the rules try to accurately crunch the numbers as a sort of cumbersome physics engine.
Now, combat is much easier to design for; it's (almost necessarily) crunchier, has more strict rules to track moment-to-moment action, all the granularity of position and timing matters because the stakes are so high, and the mechanics are (again, almost necessarily) engaged with turn-by-turn. I can more-or-less measure the effects of any mechanic against an attack roll or a standard movement or average damage output. Balancing this stuff is by no means easy, but implementing ideas is; there are a lot of levers and knobs to pull and turn which makes the act of translating fictional action into mechanics so much easier.
The thing is, while I expect my game to have a decent amount of combat in it, I don't want combat to necessarily be the main focus. I don't want to make a game about fighting monsters or dungeoncrawling or pulling off heists, I want a game about adventure. In other words, I want my game to be capable of facilitating all that stuff, depending on the scenario and the choices of the PCs, but not focused solely on any one thing. Because of that, I feel the need to balance character options so that when you make a character, you aren't just building a tableau for a war game or choosing the best dungeoncrawling equipment.
Designing for anything outside of combat is so much harder, though. There aren't nearly as many levers and knobs or reliable expectations, which is by design; I want players to have the freedom to get into and out of trouble using whatever is at their disposal, but it does make for a certain cluelessness on my part. On top of that, I think a lot of the freedom and possibility in the "default game structure" (freeform play, roleplaying, "the conversation", whatever) is sufficiently handled through roleplaying and narration, the dice mechanic, and stats like attributes and skills. When I look at other games for inspiration, I often come away thinking things like, "that's already handled by this skill," or, "wouldn't you already be able to do that?". For example (and this isn't an indictment of the game, I think it's mostly well-designed and I've stolen a lot of ideas from it), Worlds Without Number has a Focus called Dealmaker whose main effects are: bonus to a "Trade" skill, the ability to find a buyer or seller for any good or service (within reason), and the ability to make a request of an NPC in exchange for a price or favor (within reason). Are the latter two not things any character would be assumed to be capable of already? It kind of seems like if you already have a flexible core mechanic, it leaves more to take away rather than add in. It feels kind of lame for most abilities to boil down to granting bonuses to stats, but there doesn't seem to be much room to do much else without stepping on the toes of the core mechanic or the expectations of the fiction.
With all that said, I'm wondering if you all have any tips or advice for this sort of thing. Have you struggled with anything similar? Do you think it's better to leave out non-combat abilities, let the core mechanic speak for itself, and simply run the game how you want it to avoid any undue single-mindedness, or do you think it's too lopsided to have these sorts of special effects for one part of the game and not the others? Are there certain ways you prefer non-combat abilities to be designed? Any input is much appreciated, thanks!

Intro:
I just saw a post here every day about a lonely guy and his struggles in dating.
When I read it, the frustration, sadness, and despair are palpable. But since 63% of young men are single, and half of male university students are virgins, I can understand why these posters aren’t happy.
The majority of men are lonely.
While I cannot solve this very real societal phenomenon, I will try to put things into perspective.
After all, trite as it may sound, life is truly about much more than dating. We’ll talk about this later on.
Before we begin, I would like to sincerely dedicate this post to all of those people who carry a void in their hearts every day.
I truly hope that reading the following will bring you at least a little peace of mind.
This is something that you need to tell yourself every single day. Life coaches and toxic PUAs like Andrew Tate are telling you to run game on 5 women every day, but I'm telling you to tell yourself this 5 times a day:
It's not your fault.
This should be said and emphasized a lot more. I want you guys to completely digest this idea. It is important to keep reminding yourself of this truth. Once you truly understand this, you will have a much more peaceful mindset.
The situation you are in was forced upon you.
Genetic determinism is anathema to most people. You will always see the fortunate, the lucky people try to take credit for their living situations, but they won't acknowledge the opportunities they were given.
I want you to understand something: when people tell you "you can do it, you can do anything," they are not saying it for your benefit. They are saying it to gaslight you and feel better about themselves. It implies that if you fail, it was because of something you did wrong.
"You could've done it, but you didn't, so it's your fault."
Don't let people gaslight you.
You look at a guy like Jeremy Meeks, scum of the earth. This guy is the personification of luck. The guy made the wrong choices and decisions at every step of the way, and he still made it as a multimillionaire top model, all because of his looks.
He comes from a broken family, he's a criminal, robber, gangster, beat an underage kid to near death, drug dealer, weapons charges, you fucking name it. Yet, women are worshiping him, literally worshiping him.
I ask you this: how many mistakes is too many? 10? 20? 50?
When you are good-looking, no amount is too many. Anything is forgivable.
​
"Anything is possible. Never give up. God's got a plan for you." - Jeremy Meeks
​
Well, when you look like him, yeah, of course anything is gonna be possible.
​
You look at a guy like Hunter Biden, drug addict and porn actor. Still, he's a board member of a nine-figure international investment firm. All because of his dad. All because he was lucky enough to be born into the Biden family.
You look at Elon Musk, richest guy on earth. He in turn comes from a dirty rich family that makes bank with him off of the backs of literal child slaves. His 80-year-old father made a child with his 30-year-old stepdaughter. Think about it, this guy was fucking 50 years old when he adopted that child.
These are morally bankrupt people, and yet you see the lives they are living.
You look at a guy like Bill Gates, whose classmates' parents literally bought a computer room for his high school during a time when even top U.S. universities didn't have computer rooms. Bill got to spend unlimited time with the latest and greatest computers as a child in the 1960s.
I am not saying Bill is dumb. Of course, you also need brains, but even intelligence is luck.
It's brutal how lucky you have to be in life. Not only do you need the smarts, but you need to be born in the right time and location into the right family. You think a smart kid who was born in a war-torn third-world country stands any chance?
Never.
Fucking never.
You gotta be lucky in this life. The most important factor governing success in life is luck. Looks will directly influence how you are treated by others from the day you were born, before you could even remember. Your neurotypicality, face, race, and height are paramount when it comes to how society will treat you (I have mountains of data at the above link, read it to see just how important these genetic factors are). This in turn shapes your personality.
Your intelligence, the opportunities you were born into, your gender; they are all important.
Even in the job market, just your gender influences your chances majorly.
Everything in life comes down to luck.
"Anything is possible, you can do anything."
No, you cannot do anything you want to in life, and it's not your fault. Genetic determinism and luck rule every aspect of your life.
You did nothing wrong.
So don't let anybody gaslight you.
Instead, don't be a free agent in life. Let the blackpill guide you.

'It's dangerous to look for reason in everything. There is both good and evil in the world, and no reason for any of it . '
That's a line from one of my favourite games. I know it. And yet I still look for reason. I understand that I will.... Never understand. I don't understand how you changed so quickly. In 3 hours. I don't understand. I can't even wrap my head around it. And that's why I find this so hard.
I've been reading up on avoidants a lot since you left. I want this to make sense to me. It's insane how you fit it to a T. It's almost like our breakup followed a script. I read about how avoidants come back and partners set conditions. They even predicted my conditions right. They even gave a few examples of excuses you might make. You used most of them on me. It's almost funny y'know? Everyone around you knew. But you didn't. All of this could have been avoided if you just acknowledged that you're... You. You discarded me. Just like all the books said you would. You even blocked me just so you didn't have to see my name anymore. I didn't realise how painful it was to feel erased.
You know in hindsight, it's so insane how disconnected you were with everything. I could say 'i see a lot of you in Bojack' and you could say 'Bojack is not a nice person' but you couldn't connect the two and realise that you were doing terrible things. It's insane that the sight of me in tears doesn't even faze you anymore. It's insane that you can look me in the eye and say such hurtful things. You blamed me for 'making' you socialise but I always said you could go home if you wanted. But I wanted to cook for my friends because they were there to pick up the pieces after you broke me. You said my apartment was loud and chaotic but I always asked you before putting on music. You made all these decisions and blamed me for them anyway. You came back when you were at your worst. A wreck. You stayed just long enough to get better. And then you discarded me again. I feel so used.
I made a list of things I need to remember. I can't keep fixating on the good. I don't want a partner that does coke in the bathroom. I don't want to be at home with kids wondering when, no, if, you were coming home. I don't want to live in constant fear that my partner will just walk out on me because his feelings got too big. I don't want someone who's okay with making me cry Every. Single. Day. I don't want someone who's subtly manipulative, and love bombs me, and minimises my feelings. I want someone with a college degree.
I want someone who doesn't call me a burden.
And yet I cry. I don't even know what I cry for. I know you aren't crying over me. And yet I cry every day. I have never cried over a man before. This was not my longest relationship. But it was my favourite. And yet I'm not grateful that it happened. There was no character development for me. No growth. Genuinely just heartbreak. I thought you were dead for 3 days. This was traumatising. And so I cry. Maybe I'm stupid. Or naive. But I still don't hate you. I don't think you're a bad person. But sometimes good people do bad things.
I hate thunder. I always have. It scares me. And I wish you were here to comfort me. But you're not, and on nights like this I miss you more than most.

Like I think it's so insane that people will have their whole entire family in a mutual following on instagram and then proceed to post full on soft-core, coochie-out, upskirt photos of themselves... and then some of the family members will like the post. My cousin just did this. She has been walking this line for a while with the suggestive photos, but this is the most explicit one she has ever posted. She's got her brother and sister, a bunch of our cousins, even a couple of aunts following her, and one of my cousins liked it. I don't understand? Like what kind of cognitive dissonance is happening here?
What are you saying when you do this? Like if I were to heart this post of my cousin's, if her brother did- what the hell are we saying? That we like this? And nobody sees an issue with this? Yes I want to see more coochie in tight bikini pics of you, cousin/little sister? What is the psychology of women who post nearly nude, extremely suggestive photos, and then who EXPECT their relatives and friends, teachers, coworkers, what have you, to then like and comment on the posts? Do they want sexual validation from literally every single breathing being in their life? Is that what we have come to? Where sexual validation is the main form of it for us (females) as a class, and it's completely normal to seek that from every single person you've ever met regardless of boundaries and regardless of your relationship to them? We need sexual validation from our relatives, former bosses, former teachers, etc?
This is a complete erosion of boundaries. These people are so hyper-sexualized- so saturated in a porn-obsessed world- they now seek sexual validation from every person they know. Every post she makes on her social medias is sexual and this is the MAIN way she communicates with everyone. She is a chronic, 24/7 social media user. I find this so creepy and uncomfortable and I don't understand how my other relatives aren't questioning this behavior.
HOW is everyone SO comfortable with seeing their best friends', their high school acquaintances, their coworkers, cousins, aunts/uncles, even their parents- in extremely revealing clothing, tight stuff that shows their nipples and crotches and shit- on a daily basis on social media? I feel like I'm the crazy one for being so bothered by this. This shit makes me so uncomfortable. If I didn't think she would take it so personally I would block her account from mine so I don't have to see her fucking cooch anymore.
This world is so fucked and I'm mad about it. Instagram, OF, TikTok, all of it can go to hell. People's brains are completely rotten. Almost every woman I know is fully not helping themselves at all and has just fully embraced being seen as a sex object. They've doubled down and now think "Well if everyone will see me sexually anyway, I better make sure I'm as sexy as possible at all times." For what??? I hate that no hope for women doom and gloom shit but I am feeling it right now. I'm disgusted.

I apologize in advance for the length of this thread, but by far this is the user that wrote the most comments in the video of our song. At first, he suggested Scepter and Reign, but he debunked this lead by saying: "Scepter and Reign can be crossed off. I have been corresponding with the lady whose name is mentioned in the legal document, Naomi (first name used with her permission, and only her first name) since Thursday. She was legitimately shocked her name was on the document because in all these years NOBODY ever contacted her regarding it. She thinks they may have realized how much money it would cost and probably withdrew. She knew both bands fairly well, scale of 1-10 she answered "6.5 maybe 7'ish". She designed 1 "logo" for each band that was literally just a sketch she made with their band names on them she could print out in the Xerox store she worked at. Scepter's original name was actually "Dungeon Master" but they changed it to fit their name on her design. As for the abandoned demo from Scepter, she said they abandoned it because they couldn't afford to produce it. They didn't even make it far enough to name their 3 or 4 songs. So, on to the big question, are either bands involved with this song? According to her both bands came out in 1985, and according to her this "The Falling King" song predates both bands by a year or 2. This is not Scepter or Reign, this song is older than both bands. According to her, she first heard this song on a Detroit station while visiting family. Even back then, the Detroit station personnel had absolutely NO CLUE who this was. She remembers her father making fun of the singers accent claiming it was a "Posh" accent and also used to think the lyric was "The fall, the fall in the king" lol. I explained how this song was recorded off of several stations in 1987 and she replied "How many songs do you hear on the radio that are several years old?". She was stumped this was played on Z-Rock because this does not sound like an amateur band to her. She is not the only person to make comments that this does not sound like an amateur band, this sounds professionally recorded and produced, something EXTREMELY few amateugarage bands could have done. I thought i had something, but at least i tried. By the way, apparently Reign still performs in the Pittsburgh area under the name "Metallic Thunder"." (THIS IS HIS LATEST COMMENT) If this is true, it means our search will be even more difficult.
In one of his earliest comments he said this: "My 2 oldest sisters (born in 1970 and 1972) actually remember this song being played by garage bands and local talents in the Coatesville PA area. However, they both swear on mom and dads ashes that the first time they heard this song, a local music festival in Exton PA, I was NOT born yet (I was born in 1984). Even back then nobody could say who it was or what the title was. In fact the one band from Downingtown PA used to refer to it as "The Dungeons and Dragons song". And by that i mean, according to my sisters the lead singers girlfriend (or his sister....they could never tell?) would be in the crowd and when they were ready to end their performance she would shout "Play the Dungeons and Dragons song". My sisters also remember the adults thinking this song was somehow a promotional thing for the PA Renaissance Fair. Unfortunately they cannot offer any clues to the identity of this band or songs title, their guess, back then and still today, was Manowar."
At first, he claims our band is Manowar, explaining: "I do not think Manowar is an obscure band, nor do my sisters. The "obscure" bands mentioned in my postings are all the local garage/amateur bands that they remember playing this song and most of those garage/amateur bands even back then, along with my sisters, were under the impression this was a Manowar song. Many people, not just on this post but others feel this is Manowar "pitch" song, other bands thrown around have been Iron Maiden, Overdrive (Or Overkill, i'm not sure if it's the same band?), Blackmane, Axis and Cirith Ungol (spelling?). Keep this in mind, it's not that uncommon for mainstream/well known bands to have unreleased music in their "library". A good example, ask the most diehard Rammstein fans what their first song ever was, they'll probably answer Du Recht So Gut or Rammstein. Most people have never heard their 1992-1993 pitch song, "Tier" (Monster, beast). In fact, Till Linderman himself stated in 2018 he was unaware Tier was ever recorded by anyone, yet alone put up on the internet. Like this "Fall of the King" song, "Tier" was toted as an mystery song for years but was in a group of 4 or 5 other songs that Rammstein did but never released. One of my favorite bands, Corvus Corax, actually had something similar happen, a song they did back in the early 90's, "Vampire", opening for another band was recorded by a fan in the audience and made rounds on the Neo Folk community ages later. Corvus Corax themselves heard it on a radio station in Denmark roughly 2009'ish and called them asking how and when they got that song because they NEVER recorded it for public use. Personally i cannot give a wager who this is? I am not that good with this genre so i go with what people older than me and much better with this music say. To me it could be Manowar, something they never intended to be released publicly, it could be the Z'Rose a bunch of people feel it is, it could be Overdrive/Overkill (i do not know if these names are the same band or 2 separate ones?), it could be me time traveling impersonating my great uncle Fred......ok that last one was just meant to be a joke lol." Then someone says: "has your sister contacted erik to see about the the song?" and he says "OH HELL NO!!! They haven't spoken since they broke up in 1991-1992. I did reach out to his brother probably a year ago and never heard back."
He suggests it's either Manowar or Sarissa (he mispelled them): "@aSome1 There's some confusion, my sisters never said Z'Rose was playing the song in our hometown area. Local teenage to early college yrs bands were playing it. They recognized this song when I was on a family Zoom chat, i had this song on in the background (by accident actually lol) and my oldest sister (#1 born in '70) asked what i was listening to. I turned it up and she shook her head and asked the other sister (#2 born in '72) "Oh my gosh isn't that that stupid Manowar song Erik and his brother used to play all the time?". Erik was the name of her high school boyfriend. They remember hearing it first at an amateur music fest when my brother (born in '82) was still a baby. Mainly they remember mom fitting all of them in her old "Batmobile" station wagon. By the time i was born in '84 that station wagon was gone for at least several months. The band names they specifically remember playing this, and keep in mind these were "Garage bands" from the 80's were: Venomous Vomit, Razors in your Coffee (Erik's band), Ash to Ash, Cauldron Kings, Coven of Metal, Pridesville, South of Hell and Purgatory. They said there were a few more, but didn't remember....or care....to know their names. (Disclaimer: Several peoples associated with those mentioned bands have been contacted by me and several have replied.....the most common reply is "How the hell do you know us!?" lol)
"I have actually been looking at this song for almost 3yrs. I've had some "good leads" and some "bad leads" and i've also had "WTF leads".......but at the end it is still unsolved. So far the biggest contenders, from people way better with this music than me (I'm more a symphonic or extreme metal person) have been: Manowar, Iron Maiden, OverDrive, Overkill, Onslaught of Destruction and Sonic Mahem. My sisters really believe it is possibly an unreleased or "pitch demo" of Manowar but they also said it might be a Greek band from the early 80's called Sarassa or something like that?"
Then he denies it's Z-Rose: "@lostwavefinder587 I have seen that name tossed around a lot on forums and random chats (this being one of them). Most people way smarter and better with this music than myself seem to have the opinion that it is not Z'Rose. They range in reason from: the equipment sound professional and they were not, the dates don't add up, Z'Rose only did covers so even it is them in the recordings it's still not their song.....one individual (a supervisor at work who lived in Texas during this time frame) actually said "Z'Rose wouldn't have been sober enough to finish that song". I have only heard 1 Z'Rose recording, and unfortunately the person who recorded it (I think the date says 1989?) spends the majority of the 5 minute video talking during the performance so all i hear is them and not the singer. I have to emphasize about %99 of this info i'm presenting is NOT from me but people who know this genre of music way better than me....i'm more Symphonic metal and neo folk (Corvus Corax, Heilung, Faun etc."
"Out of curiosity, since a lot people think this might be Z'Rose, has anyone contacted the family/families of Nick or Joe Cavazos? My "team" is looking into a blog page from 2018 of a pretty intense exchange between a blogger and a woman who is believed to be "Rocker Joe's daughter. In this exchange she states this song is NOT her dad and uncle's band. But it gets pretty rough because the blogger keeps pressing and let's just say some NSFW language is exchanged. I will only say this, the woman's name does match one of the names in Julio "Joe" Cavazos obituary, but they can't tell if it is actually HER or someone posing. I also find it interesting that in another posting of this song someone is claiming to be the nephew of both Nick and Joe.....but about a dozen people ask about this song and he does not answer them......but someone else will ask something unrelated to this song and he answers??"
"About a year ago on another posting of this song, someone had a link to a conversation with a woman who was allegedly Joe Cavazos daughter. She very adamantly denied this was her dads band, Z'Rose. They person kept pressing her and she did not budge a single inch, "NO, its not my dad's band". The only thing that could be confirmed was the woman's name did match a name in Julio "Joe" Cavazos obituary as his daughter. But if it was her or not I can't say? Many peoples on other postings and on forums have all claimed to have gotten in contact with Z'Rose and stated they responded "No" to this being theirs.
So the "Kings Fall" song by Bernard Cavazos is actually a completely different song. He is also not related to the Z'Rose Cavazos. Somewhere I read that the "Kings Fall"/"Fallen King" song by Bernard Cavazos is about a corrupt politician or mafia like "king" not an actual king. Again none of this is from me, it's from things I read, not me.
When 'Wang' did a video about several mystery songs he included this one. In his video (I don't know if he made more than one?) he talked about how that Bernard Cavazos has been contacted and has denied this is his Fall of the King song. If my memory is correct Wang read a message from him explaining his "king" was a corrupt politician or gang leader like king. Wang also mentioned there was another Bernard Cavazos who was a doctor and he is sick and tired of people contacting him about this song"
Someone that replied to him said:
"@CharlesMarkward probably this tape recording was an attempt from them to make something of their own, many bands have started this way, an example is the Brazilian power metal band Angra, they were first meant to be an Iron Maiden tribute but as things went by, they have decided to release things of their own...I couldn't find anything about this "Z'Rose" band in metal-archives, neither at Google with a simple research, but the data gathered until this moment make sense: the Z Rock radio is from Texas, the so called "Z'Rose" band is also from Texas, it was the 80's, so, without internet, this was the way bands used to promote their work...but your story adds some drifts from this sensible data available until now...they are/were from Texas, ok...but until then, they weren't any big group, which means they were probably 9 to 5 salarymen whose musician activity was on weekends and the money earned wasn't enough to keep up with, so, a trip from TX to PA is a long ranged one and expensive for their then standards, I can remember when I've read the Mick Wall's Metallica biography, in which they highlight how hard was for them to go all the way from CA to NY to record Kill em' All, well, unless someone sponsored the so called "Z'Rose from Texas" (like the Zazula couple to Metallica) to play in the events you've mentioned in PA...which means they were good and had potential (this "mysterious recording" doesn't let me lie), because it takes a lot for someone at the other eastern extreme of a big country like the USA to call someone all the way from TX to play in an event when probably there were good bands around and without the need of a sponsorship to travel and get some place to sleep and eat..."
Therefore Charles says: "Also, i am not the one saying it's not them. People much better with much more access to metal archives/records are saying it's not them. BUT, everything you said makes perfect sense to me and I have no argument against any of it. It would make perfect sense if it was a possible pitch demo Z'Rose recorded and kept along for a few years before a station played it. My sisters are %98 certain it was a Manowar song, the only other band they mentioned as a possibility is a Greek band i can't find anything about called something like Sarassa??"
Someone told him to contact Erik: "A little bit ago someone in here suggested i contact my sisters ex and ask where he got this song. I could not get a hold of him, but i did get in contact with his brother he played with. According to the brother they got the song from their aunt who lived in Philly (Center City) and would send them tapes of songs to play. This song was on a tape sandwiched between "4 or 5" Manowar songs. He specifically remembered this for 2 reasons: 1, their aunt wrote "Killing of the king by No Name" and 2, the last song on the this tape was labled as a Venom song (he did not recall which) but was actually "Melody of Love" by Bobby Vinton😂. So i think this is why my sisters keep saying it's Manowar, because if it was on a tape with a bunch of their songs that chances are they heard a crapload of times?"
He contacted Erik's brother (Erik is supposedly the ex boyfriend of one of his sisters) and received this reply: "Erik's brother returned another email I sent about this song. I made a post about it about a week ago. The brother says their aunt who lived in Philly included this song on a mix tape of stuff for him and his brother to play. This song was sandwiched between several Manowar songs and the last song on the tape was supposed to be a Venom song but was actually Bobby Vinton's "Melody of Love" 🤣"
Therefore debunking the possibility it's a Manowar song, he also adds: "She (the aunt) passed in 2014. She would record songs off the radio for them. She lived in Philly (Center City) but also had a place in Florida, so he was never sure which cities radio stations she would record from. This song she wrote "Killing the King?" As the title and "???" as the band name, but it was between several Manowar songs. I think this might be why my oldest sisters are so insistent this is a Manowar song because they may have listened to it with Erik and his brother.....it's a theory lol"
He also thought of Iced Earth as the possible band: "lostwavefinder587 I immediately thought of Iced Earth when I heard this song. Although it's likely just a coincidence, it's interesting to note that Iced Earth was originally called "The Rose".
Someone said to him: "if that's any help, the Greek band's name you're talking about is probably Sarissa. I don't think it's them, though: the vox sound kinda different, and their songs are mostly Ancient Greece-themed." And he replied: "Yes, thank you! All this time I've been spelling it wrong. I gave a quick listen to a demo of theirs from '86. In terms of sound and beat and tempo etc, they are pretty close to this song. In terms of vocals, they sound nothing alike." Therefore, he debunked Sarissa himself.
Now here he changed his version and provides a new lead given by his sisters:
"Holy crap for some reason my last post got cut in half and didn't include the following info, sorry! So the individual i spoke to and got the new possible lead is the former singer of the one band my sisters mentioned, Purgatory, (i do NOT have his permission to use his real name but his stage name was Tarantula). He confirmed he played this song "once or twice" but didn't know the lyrics so they just repeated several "blocks" over and over again. He heard it from a band in NJ and when he asked if he could use the song they replied along the lines of "It's not our song, we don't care" but gave no indication who it was or they even knew who it was? He suggested the band "Knightmare" because they were from Texas and he remembers all of their songs being medieval or medieval fantasy related. Supposedly they wore what looked like full on plate armor (he does not know if it was actual metal armor or something made to look like it). He saw them perform a handful of times because he spent summers in Texas on his grandfathers (mistakenly said uncle in my last post, sorry) ranch and would sneak off at night to "the metal scene" (i do not know if that was a club name or if he just meant that in general?). He began visiting his grandfathers ranch in 1980 and stopped when his grandfather retired in 1992. He gave an estimated timeline for "Knightmare" of 1981-1989."
He corrects himself by saying they are not called "Knightmare": Interestingly, my supervisor at work lived in Texas during this timeline (roughly mid 70's to mid 90's from what i can gather?) and when I asked him about Knightmare he had no idea. But when i mentioned they dressed up like knights in armor he suddenly looked startled and said "That wasn't their name, their name was Battle Battalion or some s*** like that".
But then he says: "So i posted a few months ago about this song, my sisters remember garage bands in the area playing this… I checked every band called Knightmare on Metal Encyclopedia and it doesn’t look like it’s our band." "Forgive my French.....Damn. I thought maybe it could have been a lead but i guess like dozens of others I've come across, dead end. I did a quick search for Knightmare a few weeks ago and I got all excited i saw one band dressed up like monks or Druids, but that band only came out in 2017. I think it's safe to say the name has been used by many bands."
Then someone asks him: "Does the name "Battle Battalion" show up on any Metal "pedia" sites? That's what my supervisor claims this "dressed up in medieval armor" bands name was?" and another one told him: "I saw some bands with Battalion on the metal encyclopedia and discogs and none of them are our band. I don’t think we should go based on what a band wears as our lead."
Then he debunks the Knightmare (and the Conquest) lead: "So a little bit ago i mentioned a band name "Knightmare" as a possibility for this song. Well the band was actually called "KnyghtBlyde" (Knight Blade) and i got in contact with the daughter of the vocalist last night. I played this song for her and after some confliction/hesitation she said it is NOT her dad. The biggest thing was all of her dads songs were based of Aruthurian lore and filled with references to Camelot, Arthur, Morgana, Lancelot, Excalibur etc. Since this song has none of that, its not them. She has no idea who this is. I did a quick search "Conquest 80's metal band Texas" and found 3 results. Conquest from San Antonio, split in either '85 or '87. Conquest from Dallas, '86 - '90. Khan'quest (possibly same band as Khanquistador?), no location given but split up in '88 then reformed in 2000 then......nothing? I could not find anything about any of their songs or demos or releases or band members. But it's obvious I was thinking of the wrong Conquest bands 😂 Conquest was ruled out. Someone who owns the tape was contacted and told us this isn't them."
And he says the singer of KnyghtBlade is convinced this song is from Battallion:
"So a little bit ago I mentioned getting in contact with KnyghtBlyde singers daughter who states that this is NOT her dad. She contacted me this morning, her father thinks this song might be by a band called Battalion. But her father said Battalion also went by the name AAA, Anti Aircraft Assault (or Artillery) in their early days. According to her father AAA/Battalion were from Texas but at least 2 of their members were originally from Chicago. Has anyone ever heard of either Battalion or AAA, Anti Aircraft Assault? The closest I can say is my one supervisor at work mentioned a band Battle Battalion from Texas when he lived there."
Then someone replies to him: "you are right there is a band named Battalion formed in 1984" He says: "I cannot find a single piece of music from this particular "Battalion"? From what I could find they formed between 1983 and 1985, split, reformed under a few possible names, split, repeat. 2 people I asked did say they remember a band of some sort from "out west" Anti Aircraft A-something, but neither could give any info."
Now here, he suggests it could be a Talon song:
"So here's a potential lead for everyone: I was just playing this song for a friend who is obsessed with all metal music. She asked me "Where did you get that Talon song?" Talon was/is a German heavy metal band from the early 80's that released several demos and full on albums between '83-'89. Almost all of there songs were medieval themed, especially their 2 demos. Herr's the thing, they supposedly have 3 unnamed tracks from both demos, one allegedly called "King Slayer". I listened to a bunch of there songs and I have to say there are several songs where the singer sounds exactly like our mystery singer, but then the next song they sound nothing alike. There was one song called something like "Execution" that the opening guitar sounds like this songs opening only slower? I'm not saying it is Talon, but it is possibly something to look into or at least consider?"
He also claimed the singer sounds like Bruce Dickinson (which has been suggested many times):
"I've said many times that I personally feel this vocalist sounds extremely close to Bruce Dickinson. There is a clip of Bruce singing Tom Jones' "Delilah" on either a talk or game show, and his opening of that song is nearly identical to this Fall of the King vocals! Tone, tempo, cadence, pitch......it's really really on spot. I am NOT saying it is Bruce, I'm just saying whoever it is does a good job singing like him."
He says this song could be made by Eviscerator:
"Hello again everyone, has anyone ever heard of a band from Britain, late 70's through late 80's called "Eviscerator"? Very very long story short: I played this song at a Viking/Pagan/Neo-Folk/Black Metal "bar" about half a mile up the road from my place and the one patron who looked like Elvira and Lilith Bathory had a daughter together (HOT HOT HOT) comes over and asked me to replay it and she sang along with the recording with about %95 accuracy! Oddly, at the end after the 4 or 5 "The Fall of the King"s, she suddenly sang "The evil one now wears the crown, all hail the evil one" and head banged for a few moments. According to her, this song was by a band called "Eviscerator" and they always claimed this song was written as a pitch track for the movie Heavy Metal? I mentioned how this song by numerous accounts was recorded here in the USA in 86-87 from stations in Texas, Chicago, Cleveland, NYC and (by only one account) possibly Florida. She didn't feel there was an issue with that as stations will often play random things just to fill the spot including songs that are several years older. I asked about her added line at the end and she stated "I didn't add s*** bud, whoever recorded it must have cut it off before they got to it". I mentioned how numerous people strongly believe this is the work of Z'Rose, she said they probably covered it a bunch of times but it is not their song and even stated that this particular recording sounds like it could be them covering. She was more familiar with Z'Rose than me, she commented "The 3 Cavlaros brothers from Texas right? The singer was the oldest brother Jeff?" (I know that's not their name, i only included it for aunthenticity per context of our discussion, the last name is Cavazos and there was only 2 of them right?). She also told me Z'Rose had about a dozen other names through their years including "Gypsy Rose". I asked how she knew this British band "Eviscerator" and she answered that she lived in London from 78-85 and this song was played a lot on "amateur hour" on several stations, especially university stations. This kind of took me by surprise because i thought she looked younger than me (I'm 39) but she lived in England for college and her first husband in the late 70's??"
"In my last comments i mentioned a bar i went to was going to have a mini concert featuring bands that specialize in black metal and 80's tribute metal and i would play this song to see if any of the band peoples or concert goers would chime in. I did just that and got a few hits on the radar with a few of the band members. The one band, Inviaat, the singer says he remembers this song being played on a radio station in Philly PA for an entire summer because that station was trying to find the band. He does not remember the specific station but said it was near the Taylor University campus (my understanding is that there is several?) because the station thought it was the students from that university's music program. When i asked him when exactly that would have been he said Summer of 1983 because he was married on Halloween 1983 and was hoping the station would find the band so they could play at his wedding. A member from the local band "inductus Mortis" said he recalls that song being played "somewhere in the mid 80's" but does not remember if he heard it in Chicago or Cleveland because he bounced between them. I asked several bands, include the Venom tribute band Poisonous Whisper if anyone had ever heard of a band name Eviscerator from the 80's. Only one person thought he heard the name but it wasn't a band name it was a compilation album of NWOBHM from roughly '83-'84, but couldn't tell me anything other than that. As for the other concert goers, the #1 response i got from them was along the lines of "Dude you can sing, you should go pro!".....in other words they thought it was me promoting myself (I wish i could sing like that!!). the #2 response was people thought it was Manowar. After those 2 the guesses were the usual ones i have seen here and everywhere else this topic comes up: Blackmaine, Axis, Overkill, Overdrive, Black Sabath, Iron Maiden, Anthrax, Slayer, WitchAxe and 2 people even asked if it was an Ozzy Osbourne demo."
"I asked around, including my oldest sisters I've mentioned in my postings, about Eviscerator. The only person who heard of them, the one from this time-frame not the other 8 or 9 bands from the 2000's with that name, said they were a generic ManowaIron Maiden/Judas Priest tribute or more accurately, ripoff, band who sucked. I am not saying I buy this woman's account, but i'm also not discrediting it or calling her a liar. Her familiarity with this song and her accuracy with the lyrics makes me believe she knows this song from somewhere.....what that somewhere is, i can't comment because i don't know?"
"So far my friends and I have several "pings" to look into, the name Eviscerator has absolutely nothing from the time frame we're looking at. But there is (was?) a "Lee Lesaat" Canadian/British "mercenary" (did not belong to any band but would play for others) drummer who now lives in NYC my friends are looking into.
There is an 80's metal/black metal tribute concert this Saturday at the bar I was at last weekend. After the bands play their sets they have an open mic like set up where you can play your own music (as long as it fits the theme). I'm going to try and play this song and see if anyone, bands or crowd or food vendors etc, have any reaction.
And by "pings" I just mean responses/possible possible long shot leads. The guy or girl claiming to be a psychic vampire who time traveled and wrote this song for The Lost Boys movie is NOT going to be one of them😂"
Then someone asks: "What band is this Eviscerator ? I found a band that was formed in 2012 . Furthermore tthe song is not in the metal archives I searched through lyrics was not found." He says: "Allegedly they were in England in the 1980's, but the woman stated 2 of them had New York accents. If all of her account is true and accurate, they were NOT a professional big name band. I did find several bands with the title "Eviscerator" (in different variations) but all of them were from the 2000's. The only "pro" band with that title I could find was a Hungarian band from the mid 2000's. I asked Satanic lady if she remembered any of the other bands that played alongside "Eviscerator" and she only remembered 3: "Band-Shee" (an all female band....get it?) Gargoyle, and Werewolf Tears."
"I have a very very small update for everyone, but it's still an update nonetheless. The mystery succubus looking woman who said this song was by Eviscerator and sang along to it (even when I "accidentally" muted my phone to see if she was just repeating what she was hearing.....she was not) has been identified by my journalist friend! We are going to try and get in contact with her and see if there is anything else she can remember about "Eviscerator" that could help. I'm not going to get my hopes up, but her familiarity with this songs lyrics and the fact she sang almost in perfect synch with the beat makes me feel she really did know this song from somewhere in her past. That or she is a very good actress? Lol
I found only 1 solid, confirmed band with that name but they were from mid 2000's Hungary. But several peoples now and then tell me they remember hearing that name in the 80's as various things; crappy garage band, NWOHBM compilation album/work, some sort of event space or name, most recently someone claimed he thought it was the stage name of a singer but didn't know who or what band. I'm trying to get in touch with the woman who originally mentioned that name."
He posted this comment that lead nowhere: "2 very small updates for everyone:
1) The Viking/Pagan/Goth/Black Metal themed bar just around the corner from me is having a New Years event tomorrow night. They actually agree to give me a "booth" where i can have a "guess this song" set up. And, it will be right next to where the bands play...I'm going to be between the "stage" and the food truck lol
2) The one radio station i submitted this song to will play it on their "X hour" on 1/8/24. It is not a hugely popular segment, maybe a few hundred listeners, but it's better than nothing.
Here's to the New Year and hope this song and numerous others get solved!"
"So the station played this song Sunday night/Monday morning. They played it 4 times between 2:07am - 3:12am. They received 9 calls about it and about a dozen emails (I seriously didn't know they had an email!?!?!?). Unfortunately the majority of contacts were people either asking for them to replay it or people thinking it was Manowar. There were a few Iron Maidens and one or 2 Ozzy Osborne's. Only 2 people stated they heard this song before. Unfortunately they heard it from "some kilt wearing guy at blank bar plays it, I think it's him self promoting". Yes that's me they referenced and no it is not me singing lol"
He suggest matrixx as a possibility: "There's a band called matrixx that has been giving me interest. They were only around for two years due to financial struggles in their stage. If you look up attaxe and fiinal notice they share two members of matrixx. Their drummer and guitarist sound very similar to the band from this song. It's pretty crazy too because they have a song called defy the king. They also had a label to produce their songs which is called Suma Recording Studios. This may be the reason why the audio sounds too good for a small band. I hope that this is the band! Too many good clues that I found"
He debunks the Steven Lindfield lead: "One of the names thrown about here and there on posts about this song is a Steven Linfield ("Lindi") who bounced between Chicago and NYC in the 1980's. His alleged involvement varries between being the DJ who allegedly played it on a NYC station, to being a Chicago stations record manageclerk etc etc. I got in contact with him yesterday. He denies having ANYTHING to do with the airing of this song and does not know how or why his name came up. While he did work at 2 stations (NYC, then Chicago during the summer) he was an overnight watchman (security). However, he does recall this song being played on "some amateur hour crapshoot" in '86 in NYC a bunch of times. At that point in '86 he claims people were referencing it as "The King Song" or "The song of the King" (drawn out to match the singers "The Faaaalllll, the fall of the kiiiiiing") and it was already 2 or 3 years old at that time. He did explain that at least at the Chicago station there was an amateur drop-off slot that the dj's would pick through and play random "no namers" labeling them as "space filler". Because they would be played, literally just to fill space, they were NOT mandated to keep any records of them. Sometimes the dj's would just make up names to some of these. One of his main duties was to check the drop-off to make sure there were no bad things thrown in there instead of cassettes. Another dead end, but at least we rulled out one theory......silver lining??😂 LINDFIELD, not Linfield. Darn autocorrect on this phone."
He is convinced it's a professional band's demo: Thats why a lot people I have introduced to this song think it's a professional band, or at the extreme least an amateur band playing with top level equipment/sponsor? 1983 guy stated they sound like they have equipment his garage band "couldn't even afford to dream about looking at yet alone use". It's also one of the reasons my 2 oldest sisters insist this is a professional band (sister #1 says Manowar, #2 says Manowar or Sarissa) because there are no goofs or mistakes or errors. My sisters gave an example of a garage band from their Kutztown university days, "Freefall Abyss" that self released a demo and in one song you can hear a telephone ringing in the background and in another you can hear a fan or ac unit going.
He contacted a girl named Della: "This song was actually played on an old Philly/NJ station on the segment "Della names your tune" in 2009. I was able to get in contact with "Della" (real name withheld by her request) who at first stated "I played thousands of unnamed songs bud, I probably played this one 100 times, sorry i wont be much help" . Then a few days later replied "I do recall this one, it was sent in from a local listener who had it labeled as Dungeon Master or maybe Dragon Master on a CD with a bunch of old early Manowar, JudaPriest, Iron Maiden, Megadead, Metallica and AngelWitch songs. He or she claimed their father had this song on a tape from his college days. Nobody knew what or who it was back in '09 or '10 and as far as I know nobody figured it out when I left the program in '15." The only name she gave, and I don't know if this was even a real name or the drummers "stage name" was Leopald Lestat.........I do have 2 people looking into it (from a metal dating site of all places). Disclaimer: I know some of those bands are misspelled, I purposefully left it that way because that's how she sent it to me."
"I went down that road, you nailed it right on the head. There is no way to track down who that listener was. The only hint she had, in the form of the note attached to the CD was the person said they were from Radnor PA. I couldn't tell you because the other songs kind of bounce around in terms of year: there's a Judas Priest and an Angel Witch song both from 1980 but then there's a song from Megadeath (I believe Megadeath came out in '85?) and a Metallica song from '86? For some reason my one comment didn't show up? Della gave a pretty big hint, she said the mailing address on the CD was from Radnor PA, but the phone number included was a landline for a Chicago address. Her and the station managers assumed it was a "shadow number" and didn't bother keeping record of it. A lot of her requests had local addresses with out of state phone numbers, cellular and landline."
He suggests Dungeon Masters: "I have a potential lead, "Dungeon Masters" from Pittsburgh PA? Long story short: everyone at work talks about a "hot nerdy chick" who works at the one antique book store in town and she is a music genius and knows EVERY song people play. So i decided to test it. I played this song and she stated "I think thats Dungeon Masters, they were from my hometown of Pittsburgh PA back in the early to late 80's. Thats either Dungeon Masters or someone doing an incredible job imitating them?". Given that Cleveland is only a 2-3 hr drive from Pittsburgh (from what Steelers players say) i think this could be a possible lead and explain the Cleveland recording? Again, this is only a POSSIBLE lead, but i think it has potential?
Currently my one "source" is looking into it. He is not always accurate (as evidenced when we were looking into Conquest) but its better than nothing."
And someone adds this: "Della said the same Dungeon Masters so better look into it"
But he says this: "Close, "Della" stated the listener who sent in the CD had this song labeled as "Dungeon Master?", not a band name. But I am looking into it as best as I can. I found a Pittsburgh band "Dungeon" but they're NOT metal they're an Omnia/Faun like band (neo-folk I think is the term?) formed in 2018. I sent word out to the people I know and my "team". Now it is a waiting game."

So I switched to jio airfibre 100mbps plan a few weeks ago. I previously used 125mbps local optical fibre Alliance broadband. Local fibre was choking peering data transfer and I wanted to try out 5G a new technology.
First thing I noticed about airFibre is how bad is the loaded latency in comparison to optical. Sites and streaming videos all took a while to load. Loading wasn't even a thing in most cases in optical fibre.
While ookla speedtest shows 100/70 mbps, normal downloads would range about 32-40mbps. Optical game me full 125mbps for jormal downloads.
Peering speed during day time is 72mbps but drops unevenly based on tower load but is not throttled by jio. Alliance broadband was limiting peering at around 16mbps😓.
About free TV experience 🤷‍♂. Lets see. What a scam. Live TV is NOT working. Yes 80% chance ott apps may provide live shows with some delay but on certain shows my mom said its showing episodes from a year back, in Start Jalsha channel which is streamed from Hotsart app🤷‍♂
Then comes the main issue. After the evening time, when all people return home in an residential area and the tower load increases, boom welcome to 3G.
I would definitely like to cancel the connection now and want a partial refund from the Rs7500. I don't know whom to approach. Any comments or questions is appreciated.
Oh another thing, many sites which are not in very public use are simply dns blocked by jio. Also deep packet inspection is turned on all in the name of security but it's just a means to reduce bandwidth usage. Many file sharing and downloading websites r blocked that r not blocked by govt of india but on the whims of jio company

We have a toy closet, several large bins for blocks and Legos and stuffed animals, and another large organizer full of toy cars, dress ups, more stuffed animals, dolls, Playmobil, and barbies. I really want to keep confining the toys to these areas, especially as my kids are too young to be really good at cleaning up toys without my help. As they get into middle school and of course high school I'll be more lenient about what they do with what I consider their spaces. But since I am the one keeping all the toys organized and keeping the Legos separate from the Playmobil and Calico Critters and Barbies (torture for me, I spend SO many hours sorting and putting away), I feel that it is really not unreasonable to set a cap. I just saw a reel where a bunch of young people reminisce about how their parents abused them by taking away toys when they couldn't keep them clean. I agree that storming into a little kid's room with a trash bag and taking their stuff away is cruel and makes kids feel that their possessions aren't important. And yet I can't let my kids just keep all the many, many toys we are given. There just isn't enough space. There are two huge bins of toys in the garage that we have been very happy doing without for months, and I have been side eyeing them and wanting to donate. Would it be harmful if I say that I want to get us down to one large bin of extra stuffies in the garage instead of two?! Help! What are your thoughts?

Hi everyone!
Likely the most common type of post in this sub is asking for guidance about what current/upcoming characters would most benefit their account to pull. I've dipped into a few of these threads to offer what insight I have, but I feel like there are some basic principles that are easy to see once you've played for a while that are less obvious when you first start, and talking about those might help more people than handing out fish individually.
Disclaimer: I'm not a hardcore player. I don't whale (monthly passes and NH only). I couldn't recognize a damage simulation calculation if it hit my mother. My main qualification to talk about this is being a person who has played every day since release, and since about three months after that, hasn't gotten less than max stars in every MoC/PF. I'm what I assume most would call a "successful casual" player. So if that's your current goal, I'm hoping I can help.
Second Disclaimer: YOU ARE HERE TO HAVE FUN, IF SOMEONE LOOKS COOL TO YOU, PULL FOR THEM. Everything below is for getting your account on it's feet as fast as possible, but ultimately the only factor in HSR is time. No matter who you pull, your account will have everything it needs eventually, and you WILL get all those stars. If you're in no rush, skip my post since it will only be as valuable as who-to-pull advice as /okbuddytrailblazer. Remember: If you aint mirin' your fun is expirin'

~-~Okay, but who should I pull??~-~

You're first priority should always be a powerful sustain unit.
Why?
Because with a reasonable investment, the 4* damage units on your team will do just fine (for now). Pulling a damage unit is tempting in the beginning because big numbers and flashy animations are cool (and listen, I know thats why we're all here), but you don't get to see those big numbers and animations if your damage dealer is dead. The biggest jump in the power and confy-ness of my account was upgrading Bailu to Fu-Xuan. Suddenly my team was surviing long enough to finish fights that seemed like close-calls at best a day prior. My damage was still middling, but at least I was surviving long enough to deal it.

"Okay, but what makes a sustain unit good? Aren't all limited sustains better than 4*/Bailu?"

While most/all limited sustains will broadly be better than 4*/Bailu, they are not all going to be equally valuable to an in-progress account. As of right now, pretty much all of the released sustain units are top tier and worth getting for new accounts, but as more are released, you're going to see units fit more into niches that are much more valuable to more established accounts that can take advantage of those niches, and much less valuable to new accounts that mostly just need to cover the basics.
"The basics" just refers to two things, mainly:

1. Can your sustain unit heal/block enough damage to keep your units alive?
2. Can your sustain cleanse/prevent CC effects that would hamper your team's ability to do their job?

So a quick breakdown of the current sustains and how they cover those basics:
Luocha

1. Potent single target heals with free casts, and potent off-turn healing means any damage that doesnt outright one-shot your team is healed back to full quickly and easily
2. His ability when triggered manually or through his passive, cleanses, allowing for quick reactions to CC

FuXuan

1. Extreme damage mitigation and small heals allow teams to easily survive all but the most punishing content
2. Once-per-cast ability blocks single or team-wide CC

Huohuo

1. Insane ability healing output, plus consistent off-turn healing keeps teams alive, albeit at an SP cost
2. Her ability's target, as well as all recipients of her off-turn healing are cleansed, making pretty much all negative effects complete non-issues.

Aventurine

1. High value shields that self refreshes if they survive long enough give comfy margins for even big incoming damage
2. Self-CC immunity plus reasonable CC resist on his shield mean your only real enemy is bad luck

Any of these units will make your main team feel near-invincible.

But what about upcoming sustains? Will they be just as good?

Maybe! We can look at the kits of some 4* sustains to see what more niche sustain kits may look like in the future:
Gallagher:

1. Fair healing output, but requires the injured party to attack or else costs 1SP to heal directly.
2. Cleanse on ability, but locked behind E2. Only on-turn, costs SP.
3. Break effect debuff on ult/EBA means synergy with teams that benefits from debuffs/BE.

Gallagher's sustain capabilities aren't much compared to the limited units'. But he has a place in teams that will benefit from his strong debuff, as they may not need as much healing/cleansing due to knocking-the-bajesus out of the enemy before they can attack. Valuable to someone with Acheron? Absolutely! Is he going to keep your level 40 QingQue alive long enough to kill the Deer? Probably not.

~-Okay, I have a plan to get a sustain, can I blow something up now?-~

Yes! But, just like sustains, there are going to be things to look out for to get the most out of your first limited damage-dealer.
1. Is your DPS going to struggle if the enemy is not weak to their element?

• Seele or JingYuan are great for on-element battles, but are going to struggle a lot more if the enemy is resistant to their damage.
  
• JingLiu and Acheron care a lot less about if the enemy is weak to their element, and much more about why they have the audacity to still be alive
  
• Look for future units that either bring their own weakness penetration, can implant their element's weakness, or deal damage that reduces toughness regardless of type
  

2. Is your DPS going to struggle because they lack an essential partner unit you don't own?

• DHIL is great, but without Sparkle/Luocha, is going to have to compromise a lot of his turns to deal 5 digit numbers, and like, who wants that?
• Black Swan is amazing, but a whole different level of cracked with Kafka.
• Look for units that act as their own support unit. Ultimates/Passives that grant high crit or penetration values make these characters much more forgiving to build and play in a wide variety of teams.

3. What situation is your DPS built to handle?

• Argenti is the PF Konami code, but probably isn't going to breeze you through MoC, or the SU modules
• Acheron/JingLiu/DHIL can can handle almost all content at least passably well, and where they shine they dazzle
• Look for units that deal with big health bars, but don't ingore other enemies. As of right now, Limited Destruction units seem to be skeleton keys for most content.

So are other DPS units not worth getting?

Every limited DPS unit in the game has a place and team that makes them amazing. Once your account is getting its full value out of the biweekly challenges, then the best value comes from building synergies.

~-Okay I have my damage dealer, and they're staying alive. Why are my numbers so much lower than the ones I see in screenshots and videos?-~

When you first start HSR, it seems like the real heroes are the damage dealers "WoAw That Acheron just hit an Ult for 850k!"
But did they? or was it the Silver Wolf and Pela standing behind her?
The real excitement now, is in the buffers/debuffers
Limited Harmony (and utility Nihility) units are the last piece to the puzzle. Not only will they give you screenshot-worthy damage numbers, but they have much more broad appeal to teams than other roles.
While certain teams want certain stats more than others, ultimately, stats are stats, and whether that means you're going faster, hitting harder, or getting more energy for ultimates, your DPS units will almost always benefit from a limited support unit.
There aren't that many of them, so lets talk about all of them and what makes them good.
1. Bronya

• Attack/crit buffs are great for most damage dealers
• More turns for the turn god. As long as you have the SP to fund it, giving your main units more actions is always amazing.
• More stats for the stat throne. Free dmg% just for existing, and SP generation with her cone are pretty universally useful. Self-action advance on auto-attack means even wasted turns aren't wasted.
• Speed tuning is not essential, but a great way to make Bronya even better when you get the opportunity to stop and fully invest in her.
• She's not even a limited 5* and she's amazing. That's how powerful Harmony units are
• Put her on any team with excess SP

2. RuanMei

• Truly uses the entire buffalo with no wasted stats at all. DMG% Penetration% and Break are desirable on pretty much every team, and she bring a truckload of all of them.
• Getting the stats to enable said truckload does require some time and effort, but once done, you have a unit that can fit in pretty much every team and make them that much better
• Break seems to be an upcoming focus akin to DoT or FuA, and she will be top tier in every one of those teams.
• Put her on any team that has other characters

3. SParkle

• Enormous single target crit buffs, action advance, and huge SP generation make for a near-universally useful hypercarry enabler.
• More forgiving with speed-tuning than Bronya, but with just as much room for big dividend payouts with investment
• Put her on any team that gets most/all of its damage from one source (Avoid DoT teams, unless they can crit somehow in the future)

4. Robin

• More hits, harder hits. Already hit hard and often? Hit harderer and oftener.
• Full team advance means more damage AND more SP generation while putting herself on the shelf and passively generating energy from the team.
• One of the easiest buffers to build, since her desired stats are basically just attack, speed and energy gen.
• Put her on any team that attacks enemies, the more attacks the better

5. Silver Wolf

• Tsunami of debuffs for teams with Acheron/Ratio.
• Great for teams that are generally underbuilt since she also weakens the enemy's atk and spd
• Enables off-element DPS teams, albeit one target at a time.
• Put on any team that needs to deal off-element damage, benefits from debuffs, or is only fighting one main target.

6. Harmony Trailblazer

• Everyone gets one!
• Likely top tier for future break teams
• Deals a ton of damage on their own, and allows the same for other non-damage dealers on the team.
• Only comes online during Break windows, but when pairs great with Ruan Mei for fastelonger break windows

~-I have a character for all three roles! Now what?-~

At this point, you should be able to capable handle at least one side of MoC/PF, and you'll want to shift focus to your second team, but this is much more open ended, so let just talk about some considerations that will make choosing new characters easier. Remember that ultimately your goal is to have teams that can reliably clear the biweekly challenges and SU modules.
1. Do you already have units that have synergy with the new units?

• You picked up Robin for general support use, but now have a top tier Follow-up buffer. So units like Topaz and Aventurine will be more valuable to pull in the future.
• While pulling for 5*s, you E6'd Pela. So units like Acheron, JingLiu, or DHIL have a great support waiting for them if pulled.

2. Do you have coverage for the weaknesses of your current teams?

• You have a great JingLiu hypercarry team, but you struggle to clear PF. Units like Argenti or Jade (Or Himeko from the 300 selector) will bring a ton of value and become invaluable in their current PF niche.
• In high MoC floors, your B-team keeps getting CC'd/dying. Getting your second sustain unit will not only make your B-team much more comfy, but also you'll be free to not pull another sustain for a long time, if ever.
• Remember that your A-team doesn't have to always stick together. If your buffers and DPS are clearing their floors quickly, move your sustain to your B-Team since they'll need to survive longer to finish their floor

3. Is a new unit going to require a ton of investment to come online?

• Some units are amazing, but are going to suck up your resources for a while until they fully come online. Hitting the Break threshold on Ruan Mei or Firefly might keep you from either getting the most out of them while you build up your other characters, or delay getting a full team until you farm a lot of gear.

~-TLDR;-~

• Pull for units you like
• Have a plan to get a Sustain > Damage Dealer > Support unit for your first team
• Focus more on broadly effective units early on while you're still building your teams
• Look for strong synergies with characters you already have
• Build outward from your current roster once you have one solid team built

I (29M) have been doing all of the house work since my wife (28F) had a spinal injury and brain tumor. She has gotten significantly better since her surgeries, but still has physical and mental impairments. We are working towards SSDI to help with finances. She's able to do a part time customer support job to help as well. She usually asks me to fill her water cup or get/make her food because we live in her parents basement and she can do stairs but it is taxing to her. Sometimes on her really bad pain days, she'll ask me to grab her phone charger or turn off her nightstand lamp, which both are a foot away but she doesn't want to twist to do it. Nearly every night I rub her back and/or to try and help w the tension and pain.
I used to ask her to do small things like hey since you have 4 more hours free can you fold laundry if I leave the basket on the bed, or slowly work through what little dishes we have, not pots and pans just cups and plates and such. She always forgets and I genuinely do not know if it's the mental impairment, laziness, or something else. I just gave up asking.
As well as, I am the only person to take care of the pets in totality. We have a Great Dane that we were gonna train as mobility service dog for her, but I am stretched so thin I do anything and she never stuck with it. He is well behaved just service trained. I want to be more active in general and with the dog, but most days I see the mountain of physical tasks i must do and kinda shut down. Just grinding my way through the chores so the house stays semi-clean.
Intimacy issues have not helped at all either, she has both mental and physical blocks against intimacy. The closest we've been to intimate in the last 4 years is cuddling via spooning. But even that is limited because it usually devolves into her wanted back runs which forces me to back away from her to get a proper angle. I have had open relationships mentioned before but I have no interest in that, I just want her.
I just feel empty, my days consist of work, chores, video games, and rubs. She does her best to not ask me all the time and to let me have free time to go game. But honestly what I want most is her. We aren't well off right now, we're recovering, but that makes doing activities hard because we're so limited from her disabilities to begin with. I used to offer to watch shows or movies with her so that we can spend time together. But that seemed to always be shot down.
As much as I have been harping on her, I am no saint either. She has on several occasions been subject to being a therapist for me as I am a train wreck mentally. As well as I can hyperfixate on finances because of my upbringing, so she normally deals with them. She has definitely helped me become a better person and I will always love her that. I jokingly say without her I'd be dead in a ditch, but honestly it's true, she forced me to not shut away and isolate myself within confines of my mind.
Thank you for reading this.

Ok reddit buckle up this is a long one. As a growing fan of the subs, I’ve decided to tell my story. I 26M was dating my high school sweetheart for five years. We’ll call her CF for short. Yep, you guessed it, young love ignorant bliss the whole nine. At the time, this girl was my world, my life, my future. Well as the title suggests, things got interesting. Reflecting on the relationship now and all I’ve learned, it was unstable, toxic and at times abusive. There were so many red flags I ignored trying to make it work. Not knowing any better I fought to keep us together despite constant fights, arguments, and sleepless nights. Nearing the end of the relationship, in a last-ditch effort to either save what was or get closure that it in fact is over, I naively suggested to open our relationship. My thought process was, if she slept with someone else and felt rotten and/or dirty, then there was hope we could move passed it together. If she had slept with someone else and came home to me seemingly unbothered, then I knew it was over and beyond fixing. I however did not consider the emotional damage I would in turn subject myself to. Now I should clarify I had done some homework on my suggestion and found most blogs, forums and panels all mentioned that rules are important. So, as I mentioned before, this was a trial in finding out just how far gone the relationship was. The rules we set forward are the following: we bring no one to our house, protection must be used, we would never meet the persons together, and the last and most important one for me was I wanted to know as soon as she hooked up with someone, so we could talk and I could make my decision based on her behaviour. I should mention I had no intention of seeing anyone else at this time,I was devoted to her, and had no desire to see anyone else. This was purely to see if she still had love in her heart for me. Ok now into the nitty gritty, so not only was her hook up less than a week after we opened, she also broke a rule and saw her partner for over two months without telling me. Now I know this may be a point to argue, but I saw this as betrayal and cheating. We made rules and they were ignored. Turns out CF was seeing a 45-year-old cop going through a divorce of his own, at the time CF and I were 22. I’m not shaming age gaps, but this one made me sick. One week after our 5-year anniversary yep, she dumped me.
Now I know this is becoming a novel, but the best is yet to come. Ok now where does the dog fit in you might ask. Right, now onto that. Two years into CF and I’s relationship we were given the opportunity to foster a rescue dog, lets call her GA. The day this beautiful kind soul of a companion came into my life, I was in love. Screw fostering we’ll take her. Now GA wasn’t perfect at first but with love, guidance and patience she honestly is one of the best dogs I’ve ever had the pleasure of meeting- let alone getting to call her my girl. Now like I said before, GA came with some areas to work on, like not eating couches; two to be exact. Also having a strong dislike of thunderstorms, and other behaviours most common with rescues, but she most notable has epilepsy, requiring medication twice a day to keep them at bay. This is important for later.
Alright so now we’re caught up to the breakup. After dealing with my world burning the best I can, I became angry and decided I wanted nothing to do with her. I helped get all her stuff out and she moved in with her dad. Knowing that GA would remind me of her, I told CF to also take GA. Now her dads a chain smoking, explosive drunk. After giving GA away, I lasted all of two hours before I begged to get her back, I realised I can’t lose everything all in one day. CF very willingly gave GA back. Both of us agreed that my house had more yard space for her and it was a cleaner, more stable home for her. I once again had GA in my life, and it was the best thing to have ever happened to me. Ok fast forward two weeks later I got sited from animal control for having an unregistered dog in the house and had 48 hours to register and pay the fee or I risk massive fines. I went that day, now where I live, pets become registered to the occupant of the registering address, then dog tags are issued to that name. GA also is micro chipped to the same address. So, to recap: CF moves out two weeks later, I’m forced to register GA solely in my name and my address. Now its time to talk about the verbal agreement we made regarding GA’s health, so I had agreed to what I’m choosing to call visitation rights. I’ll explain, so I worked weekends; three 12 hours shifts. GA gets her meds at 9am and 9pm so enter CF. She would come by on the weekend, with written notice, give GA her meds, and spend some time with her, then I would take over when I got home and the rest of the week when CF was working. So, the rules to the visitation: she was to give me written notice prior to stopping by and if I said no to her picking her up, that was final. CF was rarely told no unless I was already out with GA or it was late at night. Its worth mentioning CF still had her house key so effectively she could come and go as she pleased from my residence.
Now fast forward just under two years CF was very good at keeping with the program, written notice, healthy boundaries, and limited contact. I should add at the start, CF and I would chat about the relationship and possibly getting back together or not, then I was told that if CF couldn’t find anyone better than me, we would get back together. I’m no one’s safe bet and that comment broke me. I was hurt, broken, and angry from then on I was personally done with her. I started seeing other people and really living my own life. I’m a firm believer that when you buckle down and take charge of your own life, the universe will reward you. So, from then on, it was limited contact, if CF would message for GA. Then she could take her and I would leave the house and get coffee so I didn’t have to see her.
Ok let me introduce all of you to my current GF lets call her JT for short. She is an incredible, beautiful, smart, funny, and witty. I could use every possible vernacular in the English language to describe her and it still wouldn’t do her justice. Honestly folks, I couldn’t have gotten a better GF if I had ordered one from a magazine. She is truly my first love. CF may have been my first with a few things, but love wasn’t one of them, although at the time I thought she was. Ok I’m off topic so I met JT and things where surreal for the first time in two years since I was dumped. I believed I could love again. As my relationship with JT grew and the love not only grew but blossomed, its worth mentioning CF’s behaviour to me, and our arrangement became sparce. CF began showing up without notice to take GA. At one point me and JT were laying in bed bare under the covers, when CF opened my bedroom door to retrieve GA. Obviously this startled us both. I rushed to check my phone, that perhaps I missed a text... NOPE ok that was unsettling. Now to add to the disrespect of the arrangement, CF was keeping GA for days at a time without informing me. I would have to text her and ask “hey you got GA” CF. “ oh yea she’s with me” Me. “um ok no problem but as per our arrangement you need to make me aware of your plans with my GA”. CF. “yea ok slipped my mind”. Ok, so now you see my growing concern with the ongoing disrespect. I had no obligation to even let CF see GA legally, she was my sole property. Let me clarify real quick: remember how I was sighted by animal control? Well yeah, where I live animals are seen as property, and seeing as how I was sited after she left, GA became mine. Amiss my new found love and bliss, and growing concern, life hit me with one more unfortunate curve ball. I got evicted. Landlord got his GF pregnant and wanted the house I was renting for them to live in. Man, when I tell you that was a shock at the time, with some other things going on it was overwhelming. Turns out it was a blessing in disguise. We found an amazing house 40 minutes away from the city. I live on the cutest farm. Things with JT and I are going amazing! Not only has she made me feel things I thought were long dead, but she made me feel new experiences as well. Ok, decision time. I HATE CF for what she did to me, and I love JT with everything and more. One is getting in the way of the other. So, I devised a plan, taking advantage of my new residence and the distance, along with anonymity: I’m going to move out and cancel the arrangement with CF. Alright time to get to work. One week leading up to the move, I denied CF’s attempts to see GA. I rented a large box truck, and with the help of a small army of close friends and available family, we packed and move the entire house in one day. I would like the take the time now to thank all of you that helped me that day. It was such an empowering and liberating day. Right, so two pickup trucks and a mini van load go out off to the new house. Me, my old man and a dear friend pack the last into the box truck. Now I pre-wrote the message to CF in my notes, consulted a lawyer appraising them of the facts and documents to make sure what I had written was clear, concise, and contained the right verbiage for legal standing if need be. I hopped in the truck, started the engine, sent the text and drove off. Oh, I forgot to mention I did in fact change the locks and made my landlord aware of everything. Off I drove to start my new life happy, healthy, and full of bright prosperity.
So, as you may have guessed, my phone blew up from CF. Texts, calls, voice mails everything, it all fell on deaf ears. My word was final, and I was finally ready to close this ugly painful chapter of my life. So, well um, I will tell you all, I’m naturally a logical thinker that sometimes leads to a healthy level of paranoia. So, my new address was given to trusted people only. Written on paper and requested once we all met up at the new place and burned in the lane way. Why? Well, I know CF and her family, and I’ve seen them do less than legal things, and know who her dad is- and the contacts he knows. I took ZERO chances when it came to keeping my new life and address safe. Also remember I told you she’s dating a cop... knowing the fallout that awaits me, I took steps into protecting what I longed for. We moved in for June first of 2022. I should mention I live with my now GF and my roommate, my brother from another mother. My roommate moved in a month after CF moved out and I can update for any questions regarding him but for now back to the story. All members of the house were to follow strict security measures anticipating a reaction from CF. I had quickly found out that CF was trying to find out where I live through contacting friends, family and my old landlord trying to find the new address to no avail. Now, I work a full-time job, as well as run my own woodworking business. One day I was filing paperwork in the front office and I saw CF drive by in her vehicle. She drives an extremely recognizable car, so I knew it was her. I wasted no time. I drove to my local law enforcement and made them aware of everything. I wanted to start a case just to be safe if anything happened.

So, side note but very important, I was given the opportunity to purchase a puppy; FT for short. After discussion with the house, we decided getting GA a little sister was a great idea, you know, get her company and give her a friend to run around the farm with. To say they were inseparable is an understatement. They loved each other so much and it was the best move we ever made. I promise this is important later.
Right, June was great settling in, getting used to the new place, and watching GA play, mentor and thrive with her sister all was great! Moving to August 2022, our guards began to fall and we started letting the two out without being helicopters to them. August 12^th 2022 oh man that day will forever remain with me rent free. JT and I are at work and the roommate’s home with the kiddos. 4:15pm I receive a phone call that will change my bliss for some time… yes GA, GA is gone “the hell do you mean”!! roommate “I let them out back, door open I was doing the dishes turned around and only FT was there”. “well did you look for them?” “yes I did, call in the damn microchip now!!” roommate hangs up. It’s worth mentioning he misunderstood how a K9 microchip works and thought It was like a GPS tracker. Work refuses to let me leave early and by the time I got home, three hours have passed since the disappearance.
I spent at least an hour exhausting any search method I could think of at the time, thinking if she ran off, she couldn’t have gotten far. After that hour I started to think, no way GA runs off and FT, 6 weeks old at the time, doesn’t follow.. Welp now it dawns on me, what? No? damn she must have taken her… off to the police I go. “ hey officer M, remember me from a few weeks ago?” “yeah what can I do for you?” “umm well I think my fears came true, I think CF stole her?” Ensue crying, panic and fear. How’d she find me? How is this possible?? Officer M “ ok take a breath tell me everything.” As I explain, I’m asked questions like are you sure she didn’t run off? I explain, no way she did and FT a young pup didn’t follow. I make my statement, broken, drained and beside myself with concern and fear I go home. No more then two hours later I get a call from M “Hi T so I’ve made some calls and I’m 99% sure she took her.” Me “what how? I mean what did you find?” M “I called your vet and an order for medication was placed by CF 10 days ago.” Me “ok damn so what happens now?” M “well this seems pretty clear cut I’ll investigate a bit more and make a case to the Crown.” Ok well my fears are confirmed. Damn she somehow found me and actually stole my beautiful GA. To this day, I have no idea how she found me. I suspect she put a GPS tracker on my truck. I had officer M looking into the possibility if her cop BF looked me up in the system, but that was ruled out very quickly.
Now the painful waiting game hoping justice will prevail. Each week I call for an update. On week 3 I’m informed he’s built a case and sent it to the Crown to see if it’s a clear-cut case of stolen property. Week 5 I’m told to hang tight its under review. At this point I became impatient and decided I can’t sit and wait. I took all the evidence and paperwork I had. I took it to both our vets as well as every vet in the region I knew she lived, explained and made airtight protocols for if, and when statements. Week 6 again I call, and I’m hit with bad news: the Crown, quite annoyed I was told, made it clear to M that this was a property dispute and needs to be settle in family court. Well, now it’s time to lawyer up. I scraped every extra penny I had to hire a good family lawyer and man did I find a good one. Turns out she was divorced and took my case a bit personally. She starts to prepare the necessary documents. 2 more weeks go by and thank whomever you believe in, I became impatient and went full proactive mode. I receive a phone call at work from my family vet. Vet “hi this is vet clinic just confirming your appointment for Monday at 11:25am?” well I sure as hell am now. I ring my lawyer, explain what happened, and put a rush on the papers having to call my dad to borrow money. You see now that I know exactly where CF is going to be with GA, I needed a legal reason to wait for her. So, I used the court case as a reason to serve her in person, thus being able to obtain GA custody until the hearing.
That Sunday I didn’t sleep a wink. 6:30am, I park my truck at the hardware store around the back of the vet, so CF wouldn’t see it. 8:00am the clinic opens. I walked in, documents in hand, and tell them everything and insist they let her in so I may serve her the documents and take GA. Regrettably, I forgot this was a functioning clinic and was told this could not happen inside, out of respect to the other patients. Me “Oh crap that’s more then fair, well what are my options?” Vet. “Well, we can bar her from the clinic under the proceeds of crime and you can serve her in the parking lot.” Me. “perfect I’ll wait in the sub shop down the way. you absolutely can not inform her of this.” Vet. “Not a problem we hope you get her back; we wish you luck.”
Off to the sub shop I go, for the longest 2 hours of my life. I get a phone call from JT, fully aware of my plan “hey we got rained out I’m off work do you want me there?” Me. “YES please come right away you can help record and dial the police.” The dominos are stacked, my shaky finger on the last one. JT shows up and we rehearse the plan; I must have checked the time a million times. The time comes I say where the hell is she. JT, with the calmest voice goes “she’s right there.” Me. “WTF!!” I ran out, papers in hand. JT calls the cops and starts recording. I utter the legal jargon, serve her the paperwork and latch onto GA as gentle and firm as I can, so CF can’t break my grip and wait for the police. They arrive in minutes. Get our stories. Check my paperwork. Separate us and attempt to figure out the situation. Low and behold, cop BF shows up. I’m told he’s “off duty” and is here in a BF capacity. Me, JT, two uniformed officers, CF, and cop BF talking, waiting with a level of uncertainty of the outcome. 2 hours goes by, and we ask what’s going on. I’m told that they are trying to defuse the situation, but cop BF has requested a supervisor. Well, he shows up and talks in great length to the BF, seeming frustrated. 3 hours go by, the supervisor walks up to me and demands our paperwork; I happily oblige. He reviews the documents and walks off, then comes back a minute or two later. “You gotta leash?” This clinic happens to be right next door to a pet store. So, just in case, I bought a leash in the three hours I was waiting. I hand him the leash. Words cannot describe the feeling as we watch the supervisor walk GA over to us after so long. Gone for 10 weeks total and waiting for three hours for the cops to deal with the situation. October 31, 2022, will be a day I will never forget. We will forever celebrate that day. Folks WE GOT HER!! What was once stolen by someone who couldn’t move on, was finally returned.

Thank you to anyone who read all of this. I needed to tell my story and I hope this was a good cup of tea for someone. I mean what I say, if anyone is going through something similar and is looking for help, please don’t hesitate. to reach out. For any questions, comments, or PM’s, I will read them, but I wish to update them publicly

Following the most recent (rather controversial updates), here's a brief overview of the shit that got changed. I'm sure most of you have already heard the news by now, via Reddit or the official update site (https://smashlegends.com/5-21tue-update-notes\_en/) but this is just a brief summation of exactly what's going on and what you need to know. The "nuts and bolts," you might say.
First of all: Every character across the board is getting nerfed. That is, upgrading characters to max level now only boosts their stats by 115% (meaning they get .15 additional base damage/health) whereas before it was 150%. Basically, every character has less health and less damage, which is kind of weird, but the nerf is basically a wash since it applies to everybody.
Relentless Lightning DMG is getting nerfed from 800 dmg to 650 (MC players are in SHAMBLES) and Prudent Beam DMG is getting nerfed from 450 to 300 (Fun fact, did you know that Relentless Lightning and Prudent Beam are the only sources of damage in the game which can't be blocked or nerfed? That means the damage will hit through moves like Molly's ultimate, and they won't deal less damage to character's temporarily under armor status, e.g., Maya, DQ Ult, or Pinocchio.)
The big thing is the runes/engravings. In essence, every character now has three extra equip able slots alongside their abilities and enchantments: a defense slot, an offense slot, and a core slot. The Defense and Offense slots boost survivability and attacking capability, and can be equipped by every legend, whereas the effects of the core slot vary greatly depending on the role and can only be equipped by Legends of that role (I'll include a list of the roles and their respective legends at the very bottom.)
The process of getting/leveling up runes is pretty straightforward. Essentially, you get boxes through playing games, then unlock them by waiting, or by spending gems (Clash Royale Style) The boxes contain stuff to upgrade your engravings-- as you upgrade your "basic engraving" stat, you unlock more runes and get the opportunity to level up your boxes, making them give more and better loot, eventually reaching the point where you start getting other classes of engravings. Upgrading engraving classes unlocks core runes, etcetera, etcetera, it's not super difficult to figure out from there.
Here's a list of the Nine core engravings and the basic summations (again, exact details and unlock conditions can be read at the link above)
Steel Breath (General Core Engraving, can be equipped on any character): If you stay out of combat for 2 seconds, the next attack gives you a shield for 2 seconds.
Tactical Superiority (General Core Engraving): After five seconds of not taking damage, enter a state where your attacks do bonus damage and you take less damage for five seconds.
Calm Mind: (General Core Engraving): You now gain more ultimate charge when you're hit.
Sudden Extort: (Melee): When your HP drops below a certain mark, any damage you deal will heal you back up to that mark
Trophy Collector: (Marksman): You gain small bonus damage, which increases dramatically as you smash enemies up to a certain point.
Victorious Ecstasy: (AOE DPS): You recharge some of your ultimate meter when smashing opponents.
Declare Pursuit: (Assassin): Attacking a target for the first time marks them. You gain bonus damage against marked targets, and marks last until the opponent is smashed.
Deep Bond: (Controller): Granting buffs to teammates heals you.
Furious Strike: (Tank): Stores damage you take and returns it on your next attack (Black Panther style)
List of new roles:

• Melee: Legends strong in close-range combat
  • Peter, Ducky, Rapunzel, Zepetta, Wukong, Molly, Parfait
• Marksman: Legends that fight from a distance
  • Hook, Flare, Robin, Rambert, Gumi, Lettuce
• AoE DPS: Legends with powerful Area-of-Effect attacks
  • Ravi, Nui, JackO, Victor, Aoi, Pinocchio
• Assassin: Legends excelling in quick 1-on-1 skirmishes
  • Red, Master Cat, Snow, Wolfgang, Kurenai, Ali, Javert
• Tank: Legends who can continuously push the attack with a high HP pool
  • Cindy, Kaiser, Don Quixote, YongYong, Molly, Timun, Marina
• Controller: Legends that assist allies or disrupt opponents
  • Alice, Witch Queen, Octavia, Brick, Goldie, Loren, Narsha

Also, make sure to grab your free gift with the code below:
EngruneUPD48

At the time of this post 145 thousand people are still without power going on almost 6 days without power. Tornado wiped out our power grid in select areas throughout Texas (I believe the number was about 800 thousand people got hit without power). Here's some things I learned and a situation report of my experience living with a very large family of mixed ages.
Context: We had been getting hit with some pretty gnarly weather however business as usual in Texas. I didn't think much of it usually when our grids down they're pretty quick to respond minus the snow storm years back. So when I heard there was a storm brewing I didn't even flinch I always keep some very very basics, battery's, lights, water, 2 weeks minimum of non perishable foods, self defense protection, and ammo, etc. But I hardly consider myself a prepper anymore, but I know some people don't even have that.
I use to be really on top of my preps overtime, however my stockpile had dwindled, as did my thirst for knowledge and hands on experience/training. I just honestly wasn't on top of my game anymore, and quit taking this as serious years ago. This tornado really brought me back to reality, so this post is mostly for entry level preppers looking at some practical advice from a 5 day experience, I fully regret the fact I quit taking this serious years ago.
First Day: Around 6pm, emergency alert on phone stating tornado in your area, seek shelter immediately. Thought ok let's shelter in the master bedroom closet. Wind rocked the house pretty good, could hear limbs from tree's falling, within about 10 minutes the power shuts off, and glancing outside within a hour the streets flooded. The storm had died down, as did the flooding, and it was time to asses the damage in the immediate area. Got in the car, power had blown out pretty much every store/house within a several mile zone. Found one square zone with a few places that had power, got some fast food but waited about 30 minutes because everyone went there.
What I wish I had on day one/ and general notes:
Rain boots: The streets had not only flooded but was blocked by limbs in the roadway. Luckily our flooding wasn't too severe but had it been I wish I did have rainboots so normal shoes didn't get soaked, or some type of beach sandals, etc.
Chainsaw, electric saw, axes, regular saw: Would of come in handy if the limbs in our area blocking the road were any bigger.
Higher up vehicles: Some vehicles couldn't make it through the flood due to being so low to the ground, so take into account your vehicles.
More variety of quality flashlights: Electric Lanterns came in clutch, but wish I had more handhelds, head mounted, and higher end lanterns.
Battery Inventory checks: Wish I had not only more batteries cause you really do burn through these quick, but wish I had checked all my lights battery condition, and stored new batteries in waterproof containers.
Alternative sources to battery's: Not a huge fan of candles due to fire risk, but some not scented beeswax or soy based candles would of came in handy to help ration battery supply. Maybe glass lanterns as well for safety and ease of transport. Glowsticks would of been great option too.
Car chargers: Believe it or not some of us didn't have car chargers for our cell phones cause we mostly charge our phones at home, although we were able to share, wish we had this on day one for all our phones.
Fully charged portable battery bank, or portable phone chargers: If we had this we wouldn't of been out in our cars late at night charging stuff putting us at more risk for being possible victims to crime.
Quality of cell phone, and cellphone provider: Have a POS phone but keep putting off upgrading it? Don't. Luckily mine was good but some of our cellphone providers carriers had better signal then others, some of are phones were in bad shape and it was noted we wish we didn't put off upgrading it sooner. You can't predict how well your provider will do but maybe do your research, unsure how this works but now I can do my research and learn from it. I had 0 issues with boost mobile but other family members weren't so lucky.
Cash: This is obvious but due to us moving towards a cashless society its pretty uncommon, but this would of came in handy due to how many places didn't have power. You can do so much with cash.
Battery powered or rechargeable camping fans: I did have one of these, it even had a light but wish I had more.
Larger ice chest: Now we had a few, but they were smaller. We lost everything in our fridge/freezer besides canned drinks, I mean everything. We had just bought grocery's too, lesson learned.
OTC sleeping medication: We had melatonin, and Tylenol pm, but it was so quiet you could hear a mouse sneeze a block over, until the generators turned on. First two are OK options but given its only going to be cool at night, and we knew tomorrow would be hot, we took kratom to sleep. Check your area some states it's illegal, not recommending it but it's what we used. I wish I had stockpiled more kratom, I took it when I got the flu on top of C word to relieve body aches and found out it really helped me sleep and ease pain/stress. Usually cycle this 3 days on max, one day off to prevent habit forming.
(This is really for day two + but ill post this here cause I noticed it on day one)
Backup supply of my personal vices or quitting personal vices: I know this may sound stupid but I am fully addicted to caffeine, and nicotine. I picked my poison and know what I signed up for. Caffeine really? yeah really not sure if you know this but for some people caffeine withdrawal can make you really suffer, and I mean really suffer check out decaf. I was in the process of lowering my caff intake to 1 cup of tea a day, and quit soda. Was one month off soda before the storm came in, but had to relapse due to us not carrying high caff tea on supply.
But yeah stock up on your vices so you aren't going through withdrawals during an emergency. Was on 3mg per ml of nicotine and had to dish out 30$ for a disposable vape thats 50mg per ml at a gas station on day two to prevent withdrawals. So I was on way higher dose of nic then usual due to only being able to purchase what I could find, for reference 50mg per ml if you use that in 10 days thats about a pack of ciggs worth of nic per day. So yeah either quit your vice or stock up, I don't advocate hard drugs at all so this isn't for that but this is mainly aimed at coffee/caff use, etc. Instant coffee packs may be great for some people.
Battery powered radio: Can't stress enough how mentally taxing silence can be long term. We had one, but the battery port crapped out. Lesson learned, test your preps.
Backup food for your pet friends: Luckily I was pretty good on pet food but imagine if I wasn't, and this was more severe.
Water situation: Had a decent amount of drinking water, we had running water. If we didn't I would say I wish I had filled up the giant jugs I bought for flushing the toilet/doing dishes or running through a berkey water filter if we ran out of drinking water. I had bought 5 gallon blue jugs specifically for this years back. However I cleaned them out, and didn't refill, Lesson learned.
2nd Day: We were able to cook some stuff on a gas stove, luckily. People at gas stations were stocking up on ice, filling their gas cans up for their generators, and shelves were getting empty at stores with power only on some things though wasn't too bad cause the power outage was scattered some had power, others didn't. Mostly a waiting game at this point, most of the preps I wish I had on this day were the same as day one, but ill toss in some stuff I wish I had. Obtained a portable battery powered radio, the morale boost was real for everyone, even the dogs.
What I wish I had on day two/ and general notes:
BBQ style lighters to light gas stove: We had two but recently tossed em out due to being empty. Realized I had no bics, and only had one box of matches, feels bad man.
Entertainment: Board games like checkers, board games for kids, chess, basic poker set, etc. These would of been awesome and a great way to keep the kids entertained and the adults, the boredom was real. We hit local goodwill's that had power to look for radios, and cheap prep supplies and games, but no luck.
Third day: By then reality set in for most people, neighbors who could afford to do so booked hotels or bugged out to places with power. The generators really started up by day three, everyone was buying gas for them and you could hear them in almost every direction. Pretty sure some people had it from the start but noticed them more by day three. A lot of people were sitting outside the front of their homes trying to escape the heat. Ice from most places were completely sold out, so you had to really shop around to find any.
Finding news about the power outage day 1-3 was kind of hit and miss, KHOU news updates were pretty short and it took us some time to know how severe the storms damage actually was, cause we were focused on trying to get stuff done around the house and conserving battery. I believe at one point CenterPoint's actual website went down. Mostly resulted to local news channels, and nextdoor app. We couldn't watch live news and had to rely on when KHOU posted youtube videos.
Private security company's hired guards and they started patrolling certain stores that could afford the security, obviously to deter looters. Traffic everywhere was insane in every which direction during peak hours more then usual, PD presence was pretty high, more then usual.
What I wish I had on day three/ and general notes:
Generator: Pretty obvious why, had no experience with them but wish I did, and wish I bought one pre-blackout when I was more into prepping and took time to learn about them and how to use and maintain them properly.
Ham radio: Or something to pick up on local freqs to monitor radio comms for information regarding the storm and local activity if any. I think this may of been better then waiting on local news to post videos.
Day Four: Buddy had power so he dropped off his generator and gave me quick instructions on how to run it, how far away to place them, etc. By day four the temps really ramped up, and this thing definitely kept us cool. When you think of bartering you think of some post apocalypse stuff, but no. In reality you can barter during any emergency, buddy dropped it off free of charge but was able to offer some booze as a thank you. So even if you don't drink stock up on booze/ciggs to barter, never know what you might trade it for. Times are tough in this economy and I honestly didn't have much money to spare, family had to pool our funds together to get last minute preps to survive this, cause we didn't know how long this would really last. In certain areas they said it could be weeks. However the alcohol was a small thank you that I could afford and he was happy so all worked out.
Gas cans were sold out, and extension cord supply's were looking extremely low at local hardware store. From what I overheard they also completely sold out of generators. Honestly wish I knew more about electrical stuff but my buddy gave me a small crash course in wiring everything. You can't just plug it in and pray for the best. Bought the best gauge extensions cords I could afford for our needs, and the distance and hooked it up.
We ran one bedroom AC unit, fans for the dogs, wired a light, and a charging station. Also don't cheap out on gas cans it's not worth blowing your face off or starting a fire, or having it leak. If you get a generator do your research on how to properly run it, and safely fill it. Crime in this area can be fairly high we've had a few drive by shootings and other not so good police involved things. Read this book along time ago about post collapse security, so I blacked out our windows so when we turned lights on no one knew we had power. You may hear the generator, but from the street we look like we don't have anything going for us. My biggest fear was looters from people who were less fortunate or really down bad. We near a common site for homeless people as well so they foot traffic the area.
Generators are very loud, between that and listening to the radio 12 hours a day, I was beginning to audio hallucinate lyrics that weren't there with the radio off, and suffered from heat exhaustion. That and the fact we had homeless in our area and tweekers who might loot I was running off adrenaline a bit. 24 hours almost that night without sleep, and didn't even feel tired. Slept near my firearm until my family woke up at daylight and when daylight hit I knew we were in the clear and I passed out.
What I wish I had on day fou and general notes:
Knowledge of generators.
Knowledge about electricity/wiring them safely.
Security: Some type of physical alarm bell to put on the door like metal door knob alarm bells so it jingles if anyone enters to alert the dogs, had to keep the door slightly cracked so the wires hooked up to the generator would fit. So we couldn't lock the door, which is probably where my anxiety of tweekers coming in came from.
Day Five: Same shit different day, power came on that evening.
Conclusion: Just cause it doesn't look like societal collapse or WW3 prep your shit for emergency's native to your area or go beyond, idc but prep. They ain't coming to help for awhile, or at all if it's very severe...so it's up to you and your community to pull through. This was a wake up call, thanks for coming to my prep talk.

I (29M) have been doing all of the house work since my wife (28F) had a spinal injury and brain tumor. She has gotten significantly better since her surgeries, but still has physical and mental impairments. We are working towards SSDI to help with finances. She's able to do a part time customer support job to help as well. She usually asks me to fill her water cup or get/make her food because we live in her parents basement and she can do stairs but it is taxing to her. Sometimes on her really bad pain days, she'll ask me to grab her phone charger or turn off her nightstand lamp, which both are a foot away but she doesn't want to twist to do it. Nearly every night I rub her back and/or to try and help w the tension and pain.
I used to ask her to do small things like hey since you have 4 more hours free can you fold laundry if I leave the basket on the bed, or slowly work through what little dishes we have, not pots and pans just cups and plates and such. She always forgets and I genuinely do not know if it's the mental impairment, laziness, or something else. I just gave up asking.
As well as, I am the only person to take care of the pets in totality. We have a Great Dane that we were gonna train as mobility service dog for her, but I am stretched so thin I do anything and she never stuck with it. He is well behaved just service trained. I want to be more active in general and with the dog, but most days I see the mountain of physical tasks i must do and kinda shut down. Just grinding my way through the chores so the house stays semi-clean.
Intimacy issues have not helped at all either, she has both mental and physical blocks against intimacy. The closest we've been to intimate in the last 4 years is cuddling via spooning. But even that is limited because it usually devolves into her wanted back runs which forces me to back away from her to get a proper angle. I have had open relationships mentioned before but I have no interest in that, I just want her.
I just feel empty, my days consist of work, chores, video games, and rubs. She does her best to not ask me all the time and to let me have free time to go game. But honestly what I want most is her. We aren't well off right now, we're recovering, but that makes doing activities hard because we're so limited from her disabilities to begin with. I used to offer to watch shows or movies with her so that we can spend time together. But that seemed to always be shot down.
As much as I have been harping on her, I am no saint either. She has on several occasions been subject to being a therapist for me as I am a train wreck mentally. As well as I can hyperfixate on finances because of my upbringing, so she normally deals with them. She has definitely helped me become a better person and I will always love her that. I jokingly say without her I'd be dead in a ditch, but honestly it's true, she forced me to not shut away and isolate myself within confines of my mind.
Thank you for reading this.

I (29M) have been doing all of the house work since my wife (28F) had a spinal injury and brain tumor. She has gotten significantly better since her surgeries, but still has physical and mental impairments. We are working towards SSDI to help with finances. She's able to do a part time customer support job to help as well. She usually asks me to fill her water cup or get/make her food because we live in her parents basement and she can do stairs but it is taxing to her. Sometimes on her really bad pain days, she'll ask me to grab her phone charger or turn off her nightstand lamp, which both are a foot away but she doesn't want to twist to do it. Nearly every night I rub her back and/or to try and help w the tension and pain.
I used to ask her to do small things like hey since you have 4 more hours free can you fold laundry if I leave the basket on the bed, or slowly work through what little dishes we have, not pots and pans just cups and plates and such. She always forgets and I genuinely do not know if it's the mental impairment, laziness, or something else. I just gave up asking.
As well as, I am the only person to take care of the pets in totality. We have a Great Dane that we were gonna train as mobility service dog for her, but I am stretched so thin I do anything and she never stuck with it. He is well behaved just service trained. I want to be more active in general and with the dog, but most days I see the mountain of physical tasks i must do and kinda shut down. Just grinding my way through the chores so the house stays semi-clean.
Intimacy issues have not helped at all either, she has both mental and physical blocks against intimacy. The closest we've been to intimate in the last 4 years is cuddling via spooning. But even that is limited because it usually devolves into her wanted back runs which forces me to back away from her to get a proper angle. I have had open relationships mentioned before but I have no interest in that, I just want her.
I just feel empty, my days consist of work, chores, video games, and rubs. She does her best to not ask me all the time and to let me have free time to go game. But honestly what I want most is her. We aren't well off right now, we're recovering, but that makes doing activities hard because we're so limited from her disabilities to begin with. I used to offer to watch shows or movies with her so that we can spend time together. But that seemed to always be shot down.
As much as I have been harping on her, I am no saint either. She has on several occasions been subject to being a therapist for me as I am a train wreck mentally. As well as I can hyperfixate on finances because of my upbringing, so she normally deals with them. She has definitely helped me become a better person and I will always love her that. I jokingly say without her I'd be dead in a ditch, but honestly it's true, she forced me to not shut away and isolate myself within confines of my mind.
Thank you for reading this.

I'm not sure where I or my marriage stands right now. Some background, I (M42) and my wife (F43) have been together since high school, and married at 21/22. We have 3 children with the oldest being 12. I haven't been a good partner for quite a while. Not abusive, but I have distanced myself and just flat out couldn't feel anything other than angeannoyance for many years. I did not provide her with any love that she needed, and we generally just existed together for 5 or so years. I checked out of the relationship, and she eventually did as well.
I didn't really understand any of this until the week after she returned from a trip away.
My wife had a girls trip with her sisters and a friend to get away from everything for a couple of days at a beach in Florida. When we were texting as she was at the airport waiting for her return flight one of my daughters brought my wife's iPad in for me to look at something as her game was not working right. As she handed it to me I had just sent a message to my wife and I saw it pop-up on her iPad. I was confused, and clicked on it, it took me a minute to realize that my wife's iMessage was signed into the iPad.
Right under my message was a message to a contact named just as a man's first name. I became concerned and read it, it was from that midnight/morning (when she was out at bars until 2AM) just after midnight with a simple "Hi/Hi" text, like she was just getting someone's number. This had me concerned and I then checked to see if her photos were synced, where I found the last picture taken was a nude selfie that she did not send to me.
I texted her and asked her who the man's name was, and why she was texting another man while at a bar, and who she had taken the nude picture for. She immediately told me that she was just getting the number of her sister's friend who they had bumped into, and that the picture was for me and she had thought that she had sent me earlier in the morning while we were texting saying that we had missed each other, and she had promised me some fun time when she got home. I bought it, and I believe her still about these things now.
She came home, and we talked, and had a nice night. The next day I decided that I needed to confirm if she was lying, and logged into her Facebook to see if I was crazy or she was lying. I found a message between her and a musician where she was messaging seeing where he was playing that night, and that they all wanted to see him perform again. When he replied that he was pretty far from where they were staying, she messaged that they (the 4 of them) would be at a certain bar if he'd like to come by after and have a drink with them. This is the second time I went off the deep end thinking she had cheated. We talked about it and she just said that all of them had liked talking and listening to him play, and that she had just messaged because she's better at tracking people down. I believe her, but still have a gut feeling that SOMETHING happened.
I checked her text message use through our phone provider the next day after she was home to find a TON (50+) of texts between a local Florida number and her, the night she was out late at the bar, then at 2:30, 3:30, 4:30AM, starting again the next morning at 8:30AM when we were texting back and forth about all of the kids stuff that Saturday that I had going on. She was stilI texting that person the morning after she came home. I checked her laptop to see what those messages were (iMessage on MacBook) and they were all deleted.
I confronted her about this and she told me it was a woman that she had talked a lot to that late night about being a mother, marriage problems, etc., and that they had messaged again in the morning as the woman she had met wanted to meet up again before she had to leave for the airport. I believed this and apologized for invading her privacy.
I need to also share that during full week (Saturday to Saturday) where the next part happens I was legitimately concerned that I was having a mental break of some sort, I couldn't eat, I was constantly sad and had what I now know was anxiety in my chest for a full week. Constantly questioning myself, and also during this whole time we were getting along so well, having a lot of sex and being so close to each other which we hadn't had in years. While enjoying this, I still couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong.
I was scared, and I had thought a lot about what was wrong with me, and we had talked about our problems in a way that I never cared to during our bad times. I was falling in love with my wife all over again, and just looking for a reason to trust her, and stop feeling like something was wrong. She had told me during this week that because I was so upset she had messaged the woman and told her that they wouldn't be meeting up again when she was coming to our home state, and told me that she had broken contact.
I told her that I was suspicious of how nice and loving she had been since she got back, and she told me it was because she had a very relaxing time, with no kids or any of the other dozens of daily worries, and also because of how much we had reconnected since she came home. She said she wanted to be close, and that I was turning her on with my actions.
This past Saturday night I invaded her privacy again to find that she had not stopped talking, and had just switched over to SnapChat as I could see the texts through our phone company. When I confronted her about this and told her that she needed to tell me the truth or I was leaving, she slowly and eventually told me the following.
While at the bar, after talking to her for a while the woman had consistently complimented her, and my wife liked this. She then asked my wife to come back to her house with her husband and have a threesome. My wife says she told her no initially, and that talk would stop for a bit before asking again. They danced "sexy" as my wife tells me, and this woman gave my wife a kiss on the lips which my wife promises wasn't a tongue kiss, and that it was quick and she didn't kiss back, or even want.
This woman then continued to ask, even bringing her husband over for him to try and ask. Then switched to just come over we can just keep hanging out and having fun.
I believe that my wife did not go back and have the threesome, I had checked her location a few times the night she was out late because I wanted to talk to her, but sincerely wanted her to have her time away and to have fun, and didn't want to ruin that. I was hoping to catch her back at her hotel, but every time I checked she was still at the bar, and then I finally went to sleep late.
What's really bothering me is that after all of our talk after this about honesty, open communication, no lies, no deleting texts, she's still doing it. I know for a fact that she has deleted messages from one of her best friends (that wasn't on this trip), and her sister that was there. Not the whole string, just individual messages. I have no way to find out if she is still SnapChatting her, and my wife told me that even after she went back from the bar that night the woman was still trying to get her to meet up. She wanted her to go on their boat the next day, come to their house for a BBQ, etc..
My wife told me that she told them maybe a few times, but only because she enjoyed the excitement of being wanted and complimented after all the years that I didn't give her that, but that she would NEVER cheat.
I don't know how to move past this, I still feel broken. I believe her that nothing physical happened, but I also can't get over that she still wants to talk to someone that tried to get her to cheat on her husband. I've never cheated, and also have never put myself in a position where there were temptations, I know that things can happen without a real choice being made to do something wrong, so I just don't put myself in that spot. My wife's one sister (who is really like her best friend) is and has always been protective of my wife. I don't think she left her alone ever during their trip, and I truly don't think my sister in law would be supportive or even tolerating of my wife cheating.
For the past week and change we have been so connected, we have been making love multiple times a day and can't keep our hands off each other, we hug so much, and it feels so nice, until the negative thoughts come back, and they keep coming back. When we're together those thoughts aren't there, but when we're not (even though I know exactly what she's doing) they come back.
I feel like I've been cheated on, but I feel wrong for feeling like this when I really believe her that nothing physical happened.
I guess I just needed to vent, and if there are any women out there that have been in a situation like this, please feel free to offer some insight, I'd really like to hear this.
To close this out, I'm not blameless here, I can fully admit to myself and her that I fully understand why she'd look for the compliments and feeling like she was wanted. I didn't give her that, and I knew all along that self-esteem was a problem for her. There are so many things in her life that cause her anxiety (which is a problem for her), me being only (even though big part) of it all. I've done quite a bit of soul searching, I've discovered that a lot of my anger comes from my own upbringing that I just buried, and am looking for a therapist to talk to. I've never been emotionally intelligent, and really just bought into men don't show their feelings. I'm unwinding it and have been brutally honest about what I'm seeing now that I have been feeling for all these years without knowing, and our relationship is in such a good place right now, and I hope for the rest of our lives. I've been different with my children, and the behaviors that they had that drove me nuts are stopping. I see now that it was always me that was the problem. I want to figure myself out now so we can keep what we have, it's all so great. I just can't shake this feeling of being betrayed but also questioning if it's my guilt over how shitty I've been or if it's the whole thing above that's still eating away at me.
Thanks for sticking around if you're still here.