The Context:

/Barcelona is the main sub for the second largest city in Spain and the capital of Catalonia. Long a tourist hotspot, much of the local economy is driven by tourism.
OOP posts a picture of graffiti in a park with the message: “Tourist: your luxury trip my daily misery.” [sic]
Users begin debating if this is a fair take, the effect of tourism on the city, and vomiting memes.
For ease of readability to a majority English-speaking audience, I’ve translated some comments from Catalan, poorly.

The Drama:

Is the graffiti expressing a selfish sentiment?

What a selfish, shitty thing to say to someone trying to live their best lives and share a bit of the magic you enjoy everyday.

Love this comment! Not all tourists are bad.

Tourism is unsustainable.

So we should all just stick to the respective cities we’re born in? What a lovely, thriving, multi-cultural society that’ll end up in /s

Not all the cities have the same problems. Responsible tourism is a thing

[Continued:]

Then why don't you vote for politicians that want to improve the situation?
Tourism tax, restrictions on how many people can visit a park/attraction per day, etc pp.
Instead you get nonstop whining on reddit. Or shared bicycles that can only be rented by Barcelona residents. Wow, good job! The tourism tax is at only 4-5€ per night in Barcelona. Compare that to Berlin where it's a whopping 7% soon (which is usually way higher than 5€).

Who did tell you who I vote for or what I do? [If you want we can talk face to face when you want clown]

Oh no, we got a badass over here. [I didn't say anything like that, of course you tourists are the problem if your head lacks intelligence...]

[It's very good to learn Catalan (good luck with what you have left to reach a decent level, I'm really telling you this with love) but don't put words in other people's mouths without knowing. There are many of us here who are fed up with the borderline situation that the city is living in and if you are a privileged person who doesn't get the slightest bit, I would at least ask you to have the decency to keep quiet when it's time to keep quiet]

[…]

No. We should stop travelling at the expense of the plane, the cities and the people's suffering. And locals should resist what makes their lives more difficult. In this case, a tourist model that hikes rents, contaminates and destroys the social fabric of the community displacing people and creating precarious jobs that provide no stability or value. Barcelona can be a great and fun place if you are staying here for a week, or if you are a remote worker that gets paid by a large firm with headquarters in Amsterdam. But that fun can be, and is, disastrous for other people. That search for sun and beach, of parties and stories uploaded to social media causes many problems for others. That's a fact. Non-sustainable tourism is what it is. Tourists and expats (high earning migrants) can be, individually, very nice and conscious folks. But the dynamics they are participating in are the cause of many problems for the city and its inhabitants.
[It's the market, friend.]

[…]

The problem isn't the singular tourist. The problem is suffocating hordes of tourists that treat your home like an amusement park or museum.
Tourism can be a real economic win for a city, but it also has externalities that can kill the very thing that made it special if not kept in check. Barcelona is a great example of this.
I say this both as someone who loves to travel and who lives in a tourist hotspot.

I mean, there is not too much you can do about it besides a ridiculous tax, and that would be a little hypocritical if you love to travel, because traveling should be accessible to the majority of people.
It makes sense to me if you defend the free market, and you put the price on your city or whatever you want to do like a libertarian, but again,it is hypocritical when we see that the political party that won the elections do not like the free market or libertarian politics.
You can't have all.

Woooosh!
That's the sound of everything going over your head

Lmao, it is the definition of being a logical thinker and not being a hypocrite.

Oh sorry, it went so over your head, that you didn't even hear the whoosh.
You're talking politics when I was talking social and economic. So, not much of a logical thinker.
But it doesn't surprise me that Barcelona would vote that way. It's called the resource curse, and by now tourism will have all but killed all other industries. So yeah, they have no choice now. Which is exactly what I was talking about in my second paragraph.

Who are the users of the sub anyway?

Because 90% of the people answering are expats. They don't fucking care about locals, they mostly despise or ignore them. Most of them live in their own English ghettos, not even bothering about anything else that themselves.

Biggest load of horseshit I’ve read all day.
You live in fantasy land and it’s really, really sad to see. I hope you open your eyes one day.

[How is your Catalan?]

[my Catalan is good. not that it matters]
Nobody “despises” Catalans. Every single person I know that has moved here is desperate to get involved with local culture, history and activities. They try their hardest to learn the language. They try their hardest to make more catalan friends.
Classic Reddit perpetual victim.

Is Barcelona dying?

Barcelona is dying. Soon it will be an empty city, a shiny shell of what had once been alive and authentic. The locals can't face the rent prices, the gentrified shops and bars, we are forced to leave our neighborhoods and give up decent housing.

Looking at rent availability and prices - it is very far from dying.

Are you looking at the prices as a foreigner or as a local? Because wages in Spain for most of us are quite poor, so yes, it's really difficult to find decent housing with those prices

And yet people don't do anything like moving away meaning situation is still not that bad.
When things like that happened in my country - a lot of people emigrated for better work and things normalised at home too.
Economy has a way of fixing itself. No workers to serve tourists - higher wages or fewer tourists.

It will only be expats and tourists here and the 10% rich Catalans in the end. Look at the most common local salary from locals in the city.

You're so close to understanding the root of the issue. Yet so far...

Yeah, it's all the fault of the 10% of evil Catalans. OK. Nobody else is responsable or can do anything.

[Continued:]

Think a little bit harder. You can do it.

[You're enlightening, kid.]

I give you the answer because you're obviously struggling. It's the wages. Your salary is shit, and there's no excuse for that because you live in a rich region, of a rich country, part of a rich continent.
And once again, one of the greatest success of those profiteering is to turn people like you into the useful idiots by pointing the finger to people from your own social class: in this case, the Ryanair flying middle to low income tourists (yeah, far from luxury holidays), who are the majority of the people visiting this city. And with whom you have much more in common than you realize.
While prices have increased, as it did everywhere around the globe, Barcelona remains a cheap city. And that's exactly the reason why it is such a popular destination across the spectrum of tourists, and especially with low income ones.
So, if you really want to change something, start asking yourself why wages are so low in such a rich region. And at an individual level, negotiate (like I did) an income worth your efforts. And if it's still not enough, keep in mind that 80% of the properties are owned by locals.

You don't know shit about how I fight, or any people like me for a more fair society. Probably way more than you. But this post is about overtourism and touristification. I can care about multiple things and fight multiple fights.

Then this conversation is over, you don't have the intellectual bandwidth to understand something as simple as how low wages are linked to the problem you blame "the tourists" for. Also, if me, an immigrant from a poor Caribbean country, is able to live significantly better than you in a place where I arrived few years ago without speaking the language, ask yourself the right questions about your fighting abilities, and probably your life choices.

[Continued:]

Lol you know shit about who I am, my life choices, or the money I earn. Your comment is funny.
I'm a socialist. I care about my family and friends, about people who had less oportunities than me. I despise people who only think about themselves, or fight only for themselves. The last part of your comment says a lot about you. Bye.

Sure, keep telling yourself that you're a socialist while defending a xenophobic agenda benefiting the ruling class. Like I said, useful idiots like you are what's keeping the system on its feet. Great work 👍

A user is crowned king:

When your own city becomes overcrowded all the time and you can’t afford to live in the center because it’s so expensive due to tourist/expats money inflating the market, it doesn’t matter how much money “the city” makes from tourism, your individual life is affected very negatively and you live worst off than with less tourism. I’m not even a local, but this is not hard to understand.

can’t really blame tourists for systemic issues

Erm, says who, you, the king?
If local wages are lower than abroad (not ideal but would be ok in its own, it’s still better than my own country) but due to how attractive the weather and culture is, people from other countries with much higher wages flock here and destroy the market, either by paying much higher (making it impossible for locals) or buying properties to rent (know many who do this, buy something, live in it 3 months of the year, and rent to other expats the rest of the year) - who’s fault is? The locals? lol

then fight for wages, not tourists.

This is why the locals hate you lol

[Continued:]

This is why I don't care bro.
[Photo of a beach]

What are you trying to prove? I’m not even a local, I just have more than a brain cell and understand why the locals blame the tourists, which is what was being discussed.

Nothing mate, I just really don't care who hates me. That is my day everyday at 11 am.

You care enough to have made now 3 comments that are totally irrelevant to what was being discussed.
“I don’t care. I swear. I promise! Let me show you that I don’t care. I really don’t care I swear”.

[…]

People working in tourism related jobs mostly work part-time, have no indefinido contracts and earn minimum wage. You can google that.
Some people are getting rich by tourism, most people are just surviving in it.
But of course 'expats' and tourists who represent most of the sub members and not local or immigrant workers are going to upvote your out of touch comment.

Some of these people need it to survive though

Not the Airbnb owners obviously

I have an Airbnb and I need it to survive.

Get a job.

What is misery?

Misery is that your old neighborhood is full of souvenir shops and none of your friends even live there anymore.

Shut the fuck up, Spain has one of the highest living standards in the world. You’re mad because other people want to visit and have a bit of it in their shitty lives? Spain has it so damn good, the thing youre complaining about is literally a problem around the entire developed world and isn’t necessarily any worse or unique to Barcelona. Stop being so damn dramatic and accept that your ‘misery’ is just you disliking seeing foreigners happy.

If you can afford spending hundreds of euros in partying and Airbnbs, why is their life so shitty? Leave your jobs and come work here as a server, try to rent anything with the minimum salary. Barcelona can be a paradise, but the tourist model is making it a hell for the majority.
Yeah, the market is being a problem for everyone everywhere. Now, people in Barcelona have to fight against the effects of the market in the city. As everybody should do in their home cities. A Barcelona for those who build their lives there, not for those who wish to consume and toss it.

Something tells me, me, a guiri, leaving my job and working in Barcelona makes Catalans even more mad than if I were just visiting.

And that something is in the room, here with us?
in fact if you live and work in Catalonia you are a Catalan. so this comment makes 0 sense at all.

Who’s to blame anyway?

Classic losers playing the victim card. Without tourism beautiful Barcelona's economy would be destroyed. But please keep blaming your shortcomings on others.

Barcelona was beautiful before tourism.

If you live in Barcelona, enjoy it. It is and will always be beautiful, and if you truly believe otherwise you are wasting the time you have in one of the world’s greatest cities. Times are tough, yes, but remember that people are also having tough times in the middle of nowhere, without any cultural outlets or ability to find likeminded people. Real estate greed is running rampant the world over, and hopefully it will not last.
Be a part of the solution, never travel again please. Just spend the rest of your life in Barcelona like a hermit. Otherwise you're a fucking hypocrite.

Hypocrite is thinking that tourism is good for the locals.

Ok great. Then be a part of the solution and never travel again. It hurts the locals. Been to London? Been to Berlin? Been to Italy? Greece? Cairo? Are you going to stop travelling and seeing the world? Everyone here knows perfectly well that you won't. It's just childish whining

The Flairs:

• “But I don't eat and vomit memes like you…”
  
• “Stop getting your news from memes”
  
• “You don't know shit about how I fight”
  

~rant/vent~
🔍I had pretyped this just ranting then I realized i can post it anonymously here bc i’m really struggling and would like some outside advice human to human feels like i’m gaslighting myself lol. They have supported me and given me everything I need materialistically and do what they are supposed to as parents in that aspect I am very grateful and appreciative of that. in no way shape or form will I ever complain ab them giving me food, shelter, clothes etc. I’m not seeking to be coddled or get sympathy either i just need to know if it really is that bad or am I tripping.
🔬emotionally manipulative & guilt tripping parents will be their own demise. lol. finally dropping that mask you have with them, making them look at themselves and see the torment i had to mentally internalize & take on over the years > sitting back & letting them continue their behavior and control to keep destroying your identity & self continuing to deal with immense shame, guilt, sadness, and anger because you know how they are and you think theres no point in opening up to them or telling them what they do wrong bc they always do the same shit & continue to blame you for everything. note this though when I finally released all my years of internalized emotions on them and started texting them very knowledgeable shit about themselves, how they treated me, my mom trying to control and ruin me and my girlfriends relationship when we first got together (+ we have continued to be together for 1yr and 3 months still going strong she ain’t ruin shiiiit) & shit talked my gf for no reason at all. When I started texting paragraph after paragraph (+ texting them back and forth.) I was met with my mom thinking something isn’t right regarding my mental health and telling my dad and brother she thinks something is wrong with me again (she was surprised how I could speak so knowledgeable bc I barely even interact with them anymore) them texting my phone asking if everything is okay and they are worried ab me (she’s also made many comments before this situation like “you seem like you need to get back on ur medication you’re being irritable” etc when clearly that was the correct response to some fucked up comment she made i’m sick of that shit.) (sorry that was lowkey irrelevant but holy shit). them throwing what they do for me as PARENTS in my face, blame shifting, manipulation, lying, her saying she has no acknowledgment of ever treating me like that over the years, trying to ruin our relationship, or saying any of the vile shit she said about my gf. OH and how she thought It couldn’t possibly be me that’s writing these exceptional level paragraphs and she thought my gf was controlling me and making me send all of that to my parents(me texting her ab this shit went on for like 3 days, 3 days of her not taking accountability for anything, lying, trying to manipulate by making me feel bad as well and she had the nerve to say “it feels like i’m being abused” GIRLLL STOPPP HUH im still confused ab that one) it’s honestly sickening and baffling knowing ppl can think & say shit like that. i’ve been so detached from them since I was little (never knew why at the time) but THIS makes that detachment 100x worse and I feel like that’s a GOOD thing for me even though the outcome wasn’t what I wanted, bc i’m feeling free, released, not pint-up, etc most importantly more like I can finally be MYSELF!!! i’m way more comfortable in who I am and my Identity now at 19 could you imagine that like damn (just hoping it’s not temporary)!!! just putting this out there in hopes that someone else going through the same thing or similar will see and maybe help them a little. now i just gotta move out.
⚛️ she can’t see how what she says to people effects them drastically and takes 0 responsibility and acknowledgement of doing so and passes it off as “you don’t know me” “i’m a good person” “i have a good heart i love everybody” etc or blame everything on me for examples “we do everything for you” “you’re going to treat us like that when we sacrificed so much for you” etc um .. yeah they signed up for that when they decided to have a child so it’s fucked up to throw that in my face. THEN she loves to do this the most playing the victim card “you’re abusing me” “it feels like you are abusing me” “we feel like we can’t say anything right we are always walking on eggshells around you it’s exhausting” she knows damn well I’m not abusing her in any way shape or form that’s disrespectful to many people who actually had to go through and endure actual abuse. “do you want to hurt us? is that your goal” “you’re destroying the family” “you’re destroying our marriage” etc literally used to be all the timmmme when i was going through sh and stuff too. i didn’t do anything wronggggg all I did was speak up for myself FOR ONCE (bc it’s been YEARS) ab the shit she does and how i’m not okay with it i internalize literally everything (that’s y it took years. just sick of their shit idk what to do). low and behold after all that expressing I get met with all that blame shifting and lying. the reason why i never open up to her is bc when I do ever since i was little she always blamed me and made it seem like this whole other thing so hell yeah i’d rather internalize then talk to her that’s a way better option than getting met with guilt tripping and shit what else could I do but internalize n doing that fucked my head up BAD. there are MANY more examples of what else she would say and my dad too but i really think he’s brainwashed by her so idk that’s just off the top of my head .. lmao. she makes me feel so insaneee i even feel like i’m exaggerating and making a big deal n being too sensitive writing all this😵‍💫. there’s SO MUCH more context but fuck all that i typed enough. thx for coming to my ted talk🕷️.
🤢they are both closeted RACIST and openly HOMOPHOBIC so you can imagine what they say/have said to me and about other ppl. shit makes me so AHHH. anyways.

People ruminate on the past, who’s wronged them, and the things that are absent from their lives. People imagine past events as though they are still happening now. They use who they were in the past to define their future.
The issue with defining oneself in the present from your past is that it keeps you bound to the past. This self-imposed limitation asserts that everything about your past determines how you will behave in the future. Your future hasn't been written yet. The decisions you make will continue to shape who you can be.
When you are a child of an alcoholic, you learn from a very young age the signs to look for so you aren’t in the line of fire when the next violent episode occurs. And the feared incident always happens. Consequently, you become conditioned to react to these indications.
As an adult, you see evidence that because bad things have happened in the past doesn’t mean more bad things will happen. Not every slurred speech or stumbling from another person will cause harm. Therefore, you can determine that the past doesn’t have to repeat itself.
Although this may take time to realize, it doesn’t have to. You’re shaped by your past. The good news is, you aren’t bound to it. You can move beyond the difficulties of the past and into something far better. The main reason you don’t have to repeat the past is because you can learn from it.

While we cannot predict the future, we will most surely live it. Every action and decision we take - or don't - ripples into the future. ~ Jacque Fresco

Your Mindset Determines Your Future

You often have feelings and attachments to the past. The past can be hard to let go of, and it affects you emotionally. Yet you have a choice to make, an option to choose a different outlook, a growth mindset instead of a fixed mindset.
The fixed mindset is the idea that you believe your attributes and abilities are inherently fixed and can’t be changed. For example, you may think that you’re as smart as you’ll ever be and therefore, that thought process causes you not to even try to learn new things. Since you don’t believe your intelligence can grow with time and experience, then you can’t change, and your future will be the same.
A growth mindset is the exact opposite. This mindset is founded on the conviction that your basic abilities can be cultivated and are malleable. This allows one to grow with enthusiasm, time, and a commitment to improving, learning, and becoming greater than before. With a growth mindset, failures are short-term setbacks, and the process is usually more important than the outcome. So, with a growth mindset, your future is never predetermined. It’s boundless.
The fixed mindset is the most common mindset and the most harmful. So, you need to know which mindset you favor so you can learn from the past and then choose a different future. You can change your mindset just by thinking it through.

The past cannot be changed. The future is yet in your power. ~ Mary Pickford

Reframing Your Past To Better Serve You

Your world is the one you make through your decisions. So is the one you remember from your past. Change the significance of the experiences if what you remember is difficult or negative. Examine the experiences that are preventing you from moving forward and try to see them from a more positive perspective. Reframe your rejection, to believe it was a sign from the Universe directing you to a better place. If you have ever failed at something, consider it a lesson in building resilience for a better future.

Accepting your history serves as a springboard and a means of getting ready for the future once you can no longer imagine a better ending for it. The way you identify who you have been and how you envision who you will be next, combine to form who you are today. Take care of the narratives you accept and write about yourself. Take deliberate steps to embrace the lessons learned from the past and the opportunities that lie ahead. 

These are the components of who you are right now. The gifts that make up your current existence have been your experiences. A clear vision for your life is essential, as you attract what you focus on. Your destiny is entirely within your control. Even if you can't control everything in life, you can still do great things if you accept responsibility, grow from your mistakes, and have a clear vision.

There are times in our lives when we have to realize our past is precisely what it is, and we cannot change it. But we can change the story we tell ourselves about it, and by doing that, we can change the future. ~ Eleanor Brown

Everybody Changes; So The Future Will Differ From The Past

As an adult, you have experienced enough of life to see that one constant is change. You grow, circumstances transform, people develop. All of this is observable. Therefore, if everybody changes, then the past can’t indicate the future.
Even those around you that don’t seem to have the desire to grow still change. They are based on the circumstances that occur in their life and by the choices they make. Not making a choice is still choosing, which impacts one’s life that doesn’t allow things to stay the same. Thus, despite a lack of growth, the future will differ from the past.
As you develop, how you perceive the past is altered and reframed. You learn from the past and determine ways to prevent unwanted situations. You make informed decisions and take responsibility for your choices, so that you can move forward toward the goals and dreams. Thus, validating that you are creating a better future than your past.
My aha moment came when I realized my past was holding me back because I allowed it to. I embraced both the idea that I had total autonomy to decide in the present and the reality that I couldn’t change the past, only reframe it. Then I choose to forgive anyone who had wronged me, as well as myself for my previous missteps. And you can make the same choice.

People underestimate their capacity for change. There is never a right time to do a difficult thing. ~John Porter

Making Your Future Better than Your Past

As you have seen, in order to improve your future than your past, believe that it’s possible. This may take a bit of courage to overcome your fears and move towards a growth mindset. Here are some ways to help you with this process.

1. Find Your Tribe To Create The Future You Desire

You may have to cut ties with those people in your life that keep you fixated on negativity. The girlfriend who’s always teasing you about the mistake you made years ago has no bearing on the present, except that it keeps your ego in a place of embarrassment every time she mentions it. The people who remind you of your failings or missteps are focusing on the negativity of the past. You may need to spend less time with these people.
Instead, focus on those people who are encouraging, the ones who are excited for you to try new ventures or take a class. This is your tribe, the ones who look at your best attributes and speak positively to you. They remind you of the successes you’ve had, to inspire you to keep moving forward. Make new friends in the areas that you are growing. It's helpful to have someone learning with you to discuss and problem solve together.
Releasing those people from your life that have a negative influence on you is an important step to safeguarding that your future doesn’t resemble your past. By ensuring that you have people who are positive and encouraging around, you help yourself enlarge the possibilities of a better and boundless future.

When we think we have been hurt by someone in the past, we build up defenses to protect ourselves from being hurt in the future. So the fearful past causes a fearful future and the past and future become one. ~ Gerald G. Jampolsky

2. Let Go Of The Past And Its Attachments

Fear of loss is a common concern, like the anxiety of losing your job and the grief of losing a friend. The harsh reality is that you will lose things and loved ones. It’s the natural course of life. Nonetheless, being anxious about the future or worried about the past does nothing but keep you from being fully present and working towards your goals.
The fear of loss can cause many to stay in a mode of indecision and procrastination throughout the course of their lives. People grow attached to the stuff in their lives. Things like their profession, their prominence, their income, their lifestyle, etc. To pursue a change would mean relinquishing some or these things that are now associated as part of your life. Because of this aversion to loss, many people choose to put their dreams on hold — continuously.
By becoming less attached to the things in your life, you overcome the fear of loss. This enables you to move forward towards your goals and build a better future for yourself.

Attachment leads to jealousy. The shadow of greed, that is. Train yourself to let go of everything you fear to lose. ~ Yoda

3. Accepting What Is Stops The Struggling

By learning to be thankful for your current situation, one changes the focus from lack to having enough. This is important from a universal perspective. Acceptance for what is allows peace to enter your life instead of feeling you are fighting just to get by.
Part of acceptance is gratitude for everything you have, which includes any hardships, as they’re there for you to learn something. The fastest way through adversity is to ask the Universe what lesson are you to glean from the experience. Then, you have to get quiet and discern how this situation can teach you something about yourself or how you relate to the world around you.
One of the best ways to help you see all the good in your life is a gratitude journal. It’s easy to write a few items each evening that happened during your day, which you are grateful for. They can be things like the beautiful sunrise you witnessed while driving into work or your child passed their math test even though he struggled with the homework. You have things in your life to appreciate, and this is where you need to focus your attention in order to shape the vision you have for your future.

Acceptance doesn’t mean resignation; it means understanding that something is what it is and that there’s got to be a way through it. ~ Michael J. Fox

4. Small Steps Towards A Better Future

Growth and development don’t happen overnight. It takes time. And you want things to happen quickly as you are impatient with yourself. But you need to be kind, give a little self-care and self-love. Pay attention to the incremental steps you take as you grow.
It took me over two years before I could meditate daily. I wanted to, but I had to overcome obstacles within myself in order to accomplish this goal. First, I set the intention to meditate daily, but I had focus issues. So, I had to work on being able to quiet my mind so that I could focus. Once I accomplished that step, I added meditation to my calendar, because if it’s on my calendar, I do it. This entire process could be frustrating, but I focused on each incremental step, not the end result. Now, I wouldn’t begin my day without first meditating.
So, whatever you are trying to accomplish, set up steps along the path so you can have minor victories along the way. This ensures you will continue to move forward even if you run into a time of struggle. Being able to see that you overcame previous difficulties encourages you to continue until you accomplish the goal.

You need to be content with small steps. That's all life is. Small steps that you take every day, so when you look back down the road, it all adds up and you know you covered some distance. ~ Katie Kacvinsky

Remember, You Are Wiser Now

It’s unnecessary for you to continue suffering just because you were taken advantage of or mistreated by others, often by those closest to you. You have the power to decide to quit mentally reliving the past. Actually, more anguish is frequently caused by your mind continuously playing back an awful experience from the past than by the actual incident.
You are no longer required to assume the victim's role. You're a survivor. And you can determine how you interpret negative experiences from your past. It’s the key to your freedom.
Unlike what some people think, you can be remorseful without always punishing yourself for past transgressions. Make the adjustments and move on. I can attest to the liberating nature of forgiveness, having extended forgiveness to my abusive mother. You don't choose to be forgiving of others in order to excuse or justify their actions. You choose to be free through forgiveness.
It's also important for you to accept responsibility for your own missteps. Since nobody is perfect. You don't have to serve a life sentence that you put on yourself in order to make up for the wrongs you did or the poor decisions you made. Treat yourself with self-compassion.
You can choose to see your past as quicksand or a launching pad. It’s up to you to make use of your experiences as a tool or allow them to be used against you.

Close the door on the past. Don’t try to forget the mistakes, but don't dwell on them. You don’t let it have any of your energy, or any of your time, or any of your space. ~ Johnny Cash

Moving Forward Believing In A Better Future

You have the freedom to decide how much control you wish to have over your present life, regardless of what has happened in the past. Although it’s impossible to undo the past, you can reframe it and decide how to respond to it.
Belief is paramount to being able to do anything. Confidence in your abilities, conviction in your resolve to constantly move forward, and faith that all your work will make your dreams a reality. Maintaining this belief is important, which is why you need to take pride in the victories along the way.
Every disappointment that you overcame, each circumstance you seized, and the individuals that arrived along the way that you recognized were there to help you. All the success along the way helps you maintain the belief that the future is going to be better than your past, because you are creating it every day.
No matter how awful it was, your past does not indicate your future. The decisions and deeds you commit to today will ultimately shape who you become in the future. Decide to take what you've learned from the past and use it in the present to live the life that was meant for you.

Change your life today. Don’t gamble on the future, act now, without delay. ~ Simone de Beauvoir

“Don’t get off until you hit the ninth floor. No exceptions.”
“But my interview is on 5,” I replied.
“I’ll only say this only one more time. Don’t get off until you hit 9th. No other floor is safe.”
It’s crazy but something about the way he said it penetrated my skull. He was serious. And, he looked nervous, like he had to fight every instinct in his body to say that to me.
The doors closed, while I thought to myself - who the fuck says anything like that?
As I went to hit the button for the fifth floor, some anxiety came over me. I shook it off and pressed it. The guy was probably just off his rockers.
The elevator went up. I scanned my surroundings - a TV bolted to the top corner of the elevator (playing the weather channel), a mirror for the back-wall of the elevator, and some cozy lounge-style music playing. Pretty standard stuff.
“Now arriving at the 5th floor.”
Weird - not sure if I’d ever been in an elevator that announced each floor it was arriving at. I was sure that if I worked in this building, this would get pretty old quickly.
DING!
The doors opened on 5. In front of me was a reception area with a woman seated at the front desk. She stood up from her seat.
“Mr. Davis! You’re early!”
The gentleman’s warning from earlier played in my head.
“We’ll be ready for your interview in a few moments. In the meantime, please feel free to take a seat.”
“Uh, thank you,” I responded. “If I’m, uh, early, maybe I can come back in a few minutes?”
“Nonsense! We’ll see if we can speed things up. He’s been very excited to meet you.”
The elevator doors started closing. I held them open. I wasn’t sure what to do here, but everything seemed fine enough. Granted, the receptionist did seem a bit eager, but beyond that…
From my vantage point, I scanned the office space behind the front desk area. All looked normal - cubicles, folks clicking away at their computer, a kitchen area. Pretty unremarkable.
That is, except for the portrait off at the far end of the office floor. It was very large. I couldn’t tell what the picture was of, but I did see a group of employees staring at it… almost, admiring it?
“Your wife’s name is Meredith, right?”
I froze as the receptionist’s question shot a dart right through me. I didn’t remember the job application form ever asking for my wife’s name.
“You two are thinking of having children, right? If it’s a boy, you want to name him Sam?”
What. The. Fuck? Forget that she was right on the money, this was something I’d never spoken about before to anyone, including my wife.
Before I could answer, the office workers surrounding the large portrait started singing the Happy Birthday song loudly, in complete and perfect unison. Someone brought out a birthday cake and presented it to the portrait. A portrait that, after a bit of squinting, I realized was a very large version of my highschool yearbook photo.
I backed into the elevator, and pressed the “close door” button. I panicked as it took its sweet time to register.
Press. Press. Press. Come the fuck on.
After what felt like an eternity, the doors started closing. As they closed, I heard the receptionist -
“I’m so curious to know what your insides taste like, Michael.”
Fuck. Me.
Ninth floor. I needed to go to the ninth floor.
I found the 9th floor button and pressed it. It felt like it didn’t register my push, so I pressed the button again. And again. Come on, come on, come on, ninth fucking floor. I tried again and again, but nothing was happening.
Fuck it. I’ll go back to the ground floor, I thought to myself. Back to the start.
As I went to press the ‘G’ button, I realized it was missing. Just that one singular button gone. Fuck.
I was getting claustrophobic. I took in deep breaths to prevent myself from having a full blown episode.
The elevator started moving up again. A panel above the elevator doors lit up with the following number: 11.
Someone was calling the elevator?
I started talking to myself to self-soothe. “It’s okay, someone will call the 9th floor soon. That’s where I’ll get off.”
As the elevator approached its new destination, I noticed that the background lounge music in the elevator had changed. It was now an instrumental arrangement of “Happy Birthday”. Huh. Not sure why this thing thought it was my birthday.
I glanced at the weather report on the TV. At least it was going to be sunny all week! Silver linings.
“Now arriving at the 11th floor.” DING!
The doors opened, I hung around the inside corner of the elevator beside the buttons. No need to have another nightmare-ish experience, right?
An old woman stepped onto the elevator.
Great, I’m sure this will be easy to explain to her.
She smiled at me, as the doors closed.
With a lump in my throat, I asked – “What floor?”
“Ground floor please.”
“Uh, I’m sorry ma’am but that button is missing. Maybe we could wait until someone calls us to the 9th floor?”
“9th? No, I think I’ll just go to the 2nd floor instead, then.”
She went to press the button.
“Ma’am, I don’t think it’d be safe to–”
“I have plenty of friends on the 2nd floor. It’ll be okay.”
Aaaaaaand she pressed it. I didn’t feel comfortable cornering an elderly stranger in a seemingly haunted elevator. But I tried again to convince her –
“I know this sounds weird, but I have it under good authority that the 2nd floor probably isn’t safe. I’d strongly recommend not getting off until we reach 9.”
She smiled.
“Dear, it’ll be alright. You know, I like to take all opportunities that are given to me. It’s… a shame that you turned your opportunity down. I know the folks on 5 are very disappointed.”
I backed up into the corner of the elevator.
I saw the reflection of the old lady in the elevator’s back mirror. She looked ghastly. Otherworldly.
“Now arriving at the 2nd floor.”
The doors opened. She smiled at me again, and then exited.
I poked my head around the corner to look at the 2nd floor. It was damp. It looked old. More like a cave than an office. I heard a low rumble.
A man dressed in a fancy suit approached the elevator doors and held them open before they could close.
“You getting off here too, champ? I heard that 5 wanted you. I think we can give you a better offer.”
“I’m good.”
“You sure, bud? The salary is eight hundred thousand dollars every hour.”
“I’m good.”
“I’m kidding bud. The salary is we remove your eyes so you don’t have to see him.”
The floor went pitch black. The low rumble got much louder and started reverberating in my ears. Suddenly, the businessman grabbed me by the collar and tried to pull me out of the elevator.
I clung onto the ends of it. Fuck. Fuck!
I started kicking and headbutting him. I was able to make him let go of me momentarily, as I desperately pressed on the “close doors” button. Miraculously, the elevator responded much quicker this time and they closed immediately.
I tried the 9th floor button again. Didn’t work. I pressed 8 instead. Anything to get away from this hell-hole of a floor.
I heard a loud banging on the door as the elevator started taking off. Like an aggressive knock.
BANG! BANG! BANG!
As I saw the floor numbers rising -
3… 4… 5…
The banging continued. Just as loud. What the fuck?
6th floor… 7th floor…
The banging on the door didn’t subside.
“Now arriving at the 8th flo–”
I pressed the button for the 23rd floor. Just as we arrived on 8, I mashed the “close doors” button just as the elevator doors were about to open. The banging continued as the elevator doors started denting.
The elevator continued going up.
9…
10…
11…
The banging softened.
14…
15…
And softened.
19…
20…
21…
And disappeared.
“Now arriving at the 23rd floor.”
It was gone. Thank fucking god.
I exhaled. It felt like I’d narrowly avoided disaster.
The doors opened.
I scanned the new floor, and I realized… I was back on the ground floor. That’s what it looked like, anyways. Did I escape? Was I finally free?
A man stood not-too-far from the door. He looked familiar, but I couldn’t exactly place him.
“Hey man,” he spoke.
Was this the guy who got off the elevator just as I got on?
“...hey.”
“It’s over man. You got out,” he told me.
I felt a wave of relief wash over me… but I had to fight it.
“But you said the 9th floor was the only safe one, right?”
“That was a trick. You followed your gut and you were right. 23rd floor. The real safe floor. You can step out now, man.”
I didn’t leave.
“There’s someone here who really wants to see you.”
I couldn’t move.
“He wants to give you a job. He thinks you’re gonna be great.”
Why the fuck couldn’t I move?
“He’s in the other room. I’m gonna fetch him, okay? All you have to do is look at him. It’ll feel a bit weird at first, but then it’ll all be okay. It’s a permanent position. Great benefits. It is fully onsite, but, no better birthday present than a new job, right?”
I lowered my gaze to the floor. I forced myself to mutter the following words - “It’s not my fucking birthday.”
As he left to fetch… whoever he was meaning to fetch, he gave me the following response: “Relax, man. No cursing on the job. We’re a family here.”
It felt like I could only move a centimeter at a time. A true snail’s pace. I inched my finger closer and closer to the “close door” button.
I heard footsteps. He was coming back.
With every fiber of my being, I pushed through. I hit the button.
The doors closed, and I collapsed to the floor… free from whatever weird force was stopping me from moving.
“I’ll let you two talk more on the elevator,” I heard him say from outside the doors.
What?
Instinctively, I looked around.
To my surprise, there was nothing. The elevator was the same as it had always been.
A lengthy exhale. I was done with all of this. At this point, I would’ve taken death over continuing this bullshit any longer.
As I pondered my next move in this hopeless situation, I noticed something strange. The button to the 9th floor was lit up. An ominous, crimson-red color.
Before I could do anything else, my phone started ringing. I checked the call.
It was my wife.
I answered.
“Babe. Fuck, I don’t know why I didn’t even think to call you - I’m trapped in an elevator and fucked up shit is happening and maybe I should call the cops? Fuck I–”
“Hun. Don’t go to the ninth floor.”
“What? W-wait, how do you even–”
“It’s a trick, honey. You have to trust me. The man from before was lying to you. It’s not safe.”
“None of this has been safe! How do you even know everything that’s happening?!”
“You just need to trust me, hun.”
I paused.
“So what do you want me to do then?”
A demon on the other side of the phone answered this time.
“GO TO YOUR INTERVIEW.”
I hung up the call and in a panic, I mashed on the 9th floor button. The elevator started rising again.
Even with me hanging up the call, the muffled sound of the demonic voice coming from my phone continued.
“GO TO YOUR INTERVIEW.
GO TO YOUR INTERVIEW.
GO TO YOUR INTERVIEW.”
I pulled out my phone and flung it to the ground as hard as I could. I stomped on it angrily. The warped sound of “GO TO YOUR INTERVIEW” slowly started dying out.
But suddenly, the elevator started shaking. It was continuing to go up… but it was faster than usual. Really, really fucking fast all of a sudden. Almost like the 9th floor was now way below me.
It felt like an amusement park ride with no breaks on it. Loose. Dangerous. Flinging up at an insane speed, almost as if it was falling upwards.
“But I pressed nine?!” I screamed to myself, exasperated.
It didn’t matter.
“Now arriving at the 41st floor.”
God, what the fuck?
I was brought to my knees by the speed of the elevator traveling faster and faster.
“Now arriving at the 90th floor.”
The buttons didn’t even go past 52.
“Now arriving at the 141st floor.”
Fuck.
“Now arriving at the 230th floor.”
“Now arriving at the 401st floor.”
I felt like I was inside a bullet. The pleasant voice of the elevator lady was getting deeper and deeper as we rose.
“Now arriving at the 840th floor.”
The voice started croaking. A demonic sound this time –
“Now arriving at SOMEWHERE NICE.”
A sudden halt. The elevator stopped. The doors didn’t open though. The panel above the elevator doors had no indication on what floor we were on.
As I sat, I heard what could be best described as the sounds of hell coming from outside the elevator. Low grunts of pain. Crackling. A dark hymn.
Was this where I was supposed to get off?
Before I could ponder the question further, I heard a soft tapping on the elevator. A voice from outside –
“Do you want to trade?” said the voice.
I decided to bite, for reasons I still don’t fully understand.
“What do you mean?”
“What if you stay on this floor forever, and I get to go home?”
“Uhm. I, uh, think I’m good…”
“But I really want to go home.”
It almost sounded like the voice of a kid. Fucking hell.
“I-I’m sorry, kid,” I mustered back.
“It’s okay.”
An awkward silence between us.
“He told me that he wants to wish you a Happy Birthday,” said the kid.
“I, uh… think he’s got it wrong. Today isn’t my birthday.”
“It is,” he responded. “It’s the first day of your new life. Your birthday.”
…?
“He wants you to look at the TV.”
What?
I looked at the TV in the top corner of the elevator, hoping to see the one constant I’d had during this whole cursed trip - the weather.
Instead, the TV was now showcasing what looked to be CCTV footage. Grainy footage from a camera… of the exact elevator I was in. A live feed of this exact moment.
Except, the TV showed me lying down. Looking up with a wide smile on my face.
And something above me on the ceiling. Looking straight down at me.
Him.
The lights in the elevator went off. The elevator plummeted downwards, as I closed my eyes and screamed for dear fucking life.
I waited for the impact.
For what I knew was my demise.
Here it comes.
Here it fucking comes.
I’m not ready.
I’m not ready at all.
“Now arriving at the 9th floor.”
DING!
The doors opened.
Wait, what?
9th floor?
I peeked out from the elevator.
Another reception desk.
Wait, is this really the -
I was interrupted by a voice from the outside.
“You coming out or what you fucking moron?”
I got to my feet. The feeling of distrust… anxiety, whatever you’d call it. My fear intuition. It was gone.
I felt light.
Fuck it.
I stepped onto the floor and approached the counter.
The receptionist handed me what looked like a button for the elevator.
“For the ground floor,” she said. “Single use only.”
I took it and headed towards the elevator.
Then, I turned back to face her.
“Can I maybe take the stairs?”
She shook her head.
“If you didn’t like the elevator, then you’re really not gonna like the stairs.”
Fair enough.
I got into the elevator.
I said a silent prayer to myself as I put the button where it belonged.
It fit without any issue.
I pressed it, and the elevator went down. It was a smooth ride.
“Now arriving at the ground floor.”
DING!
As I got ready to exit, I realized that the ground floor button was missing once again. Strange. I didn’t linger on it.
I marched out, ready to get the fuck out of this building.
I noticed a woman running onto the elevator. I tried to stop her, but something in my body wouldn’t let me.
The most I could muster was putting my hand on the door to relay a message to her before the doors closed.
“Don’t get off until you reach the 9th floor. No matter what.”
The woman just smiled at me.
“Happy Birthday Michael.”

This is something people outside the cptsd experience seem absolutely unaware of. It goes beyond (and so much worse) the realm of things like depression and anxiety (at least for me).
Your body is overall weaker firstly. We don’t go outside much and workouts can be rare (if present at all). Coupled with poor sleep and lack of appetite, you loose so much weight, your muscle strength and endurance bottoms out quickly, tiredness is constant, even the energy to think is too low to improve consistently.
Then there are specific trauma ailments, due to whatever is tormenting you emotionally. For me that leads to a lot of mental block (literally feels like someone jammed a huge block in my brain), tinnitus occurrence, gagging & nausea, to even shaking and shivering in the worst moments. You’re on edge, ready to breakdown at the slightest inconvenience.
There’s the constant medical scare if your symptoms are of some other ailment outside ptsd, and you have to often get tests and vitals checked just to be sure.
Psychiatry medications help you regulate, but also have side effects that can contribute to the above.
Your immune system is overall weaker too. Basic things like flu hit harder and take longer to recover. It can exacerbate any of the above. And if you have any other comorbidity, chronic or mental illnesses already, talk about destination fucked! And let’s not forget the high cortisol level and inflammations all this stress is causing us and priming us for future ailments. Deterioration.
I’m in the thick of it all currently. And writing this for anyone else dealing with this kind of shit. No wonder we are further low on motivation and the will to exist. Who would wanna live like this! 🤮
Let this be a reminder how much gentler and caring we need to be to ourselves, especially when no one else is. I know you don’t even want to because of that. But remember it’s all cyclical, and health really is the most important thing! I’ve lived with depression for almost a decade before, and never felt I was struggling to survive like this! It’s seems obvious but so hard to achieve stable physical health. But it could ease things so much if we do! Little by little I guess. 🤍
Ps. Sorry if I missed anything. Feel free to use this as a space to call out awareness to other physical struggles if you want to.
Pps. Not getting into the sex-drive aspect of things. That’s a differently complex final boss. 👹 CPTSD really is a souls-like game ain’t it. No checkpoint bonfires or trophies though.

I contemplated writing this all day but decided it might be helpful to someone else if I shared my bittersweet EDC 2024 experience.
This year was my second year at EDC, and despite a few negative experiences sprinkled throughout, I honestly had the time of my life.
Saturday, while I was sitting on the turf mound at Basspod VIP, I was assaulted. A guy, we’ll call him Mo, had come up to where me, my wife, and my wife’s friend were sitting and started talking to my wife. They chatted briefly. Then, my wife returned to dancing, and Mo turned around talking to someone else.
A few minutes later, Mo tapped me on the shoulder and said, “You and your wife look so good together.” I replied, “Aww, thank you so much,” and returned to resume my head banging. Not even five minutes later, as I was zoned out, feeling the music and vibes, I felt something brushing against my back. It was Mo.
Now, I know it’s nearly impossible not to brush up against other people, so I try to be super tolerant and understand that most people aren’t trying to be creeps; it’s just close quarters.
But no sooner than I had moved forward a bit, I felt someone’s hand underneath my vest pouch fondling and massaging my breast. Initially, when I looked back, I was confused, but I realized that Mo was lying on his back and had reached his hand under my vest.
When I turned around like, “Wtf are you doing?” He threw his hands up and just started apologizing profusely. I tried to tell him to gtfoh and go someplace else because I didn’t feel comfortable with him behind me, but he just kept saying, “I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry.”
I don't know if my wife’s friend, sitting on my right, saw what happened, but I know she saw me fussing at this guy, trying to tell him to gtfoh. She didn’t say or do anything. Then, I told my wife, who had been talking with another couple, what happened, and that I had tried to ask him to go somewhere else because I didn’t feel comfortable with him behind me but that he just stayed there apologizing over and over. She asked if I wanted to switch seats with her or if I wanted her to do anything, and I just said no.
The boy was clearly faded; he had mentioned this to my wife, and I didn’t want to ruin anyone’s experience, so I just turned around and tried to shake it off. I knew this wasn’t the end, and I was ready.
Again, not even five minutes had passed, and I felt a hand grip my right shoulder. I hear Mo start saying, “I’m so sorry, I…” but before he could finish, I turned around and punched him with probably the best right hook of my life. Or maybe it just felt that way because of how good it felt watching his body reel backward and seeing the anger rise in his face as the realization that he just got socked by a 5’4” 130 lb female set in.
As soon as I punched him, his friends came rushing in, pulling him back like, “Hey, chill! Our friend is just really fucked up right now,” blah blah blah. My wife turned to see the commotion and was like, “Aye, the next time your friend puts his hands on my wife, he’s getting beat tf up.”In response, one of the friends said, “This is my wife right here, so I understand,” trying to tell us we needed to calm down. My wife told them basically, “No, y’all need to get your friend because my wife was just about to cry when your friend was groping her breasts. Do you want to put your wife between him and my wife then?”
Maybe they only saw him grab my shoulder and me socking him, but no matter how I try to justify it, there are so many things wrong with everything that happened. First, if I ever see a woman straight up punch a man TWICE her size, I’m immediately going to ask her wtf happened and if she is ok.
Second, this experience has taught me a lot. It’s been painful, mainly because it still boggles my mind that sexual assault is so quickly brushed off. I’m not expecting anyone to lay hands on someone for me, but a little solidarity would have gone a long way in that situation.
I’m annoyed it didn’t become a scene until I punched him. No one wanted to get up and stand up to this man after he sexually assaulted me in front of hundreds of people—but throw a punch and, wow, the outrage.
None of the friends asked me if I was okay or tried to take him far away from me. I understand my wife and her friend not stepping in too much in the beginning; it is a man who is bigger and likely stronger, and women are often afraid that worse will happen if they make a scene, but still. If we all stood up to him and forced him to leave after assaulting me, it would have felt a hell of a lot better than having to wait to be touched again so that I could physically handle it myself.
With that, my only request is that my fellow rave-goers, please don’t be a bystander or an enabling friend. If you see something, say something. Every conflict doesn’t have to be resolved by violence. Myself and even five other people standing up to Mo saying hey you need to leave or there’s gonna be a scene, would have likely been enough to pressure him to find somewhere else to be a creep. Instead, I had to sit with this man less than a foot behind me who had just fondled and groped my breast and waited for him to strike again to defend myself. Even after I hit him, he and his friends just stayed. Please be the friend that understands when shit has gone too far, and get your friend somewhere different if they are being a nuisance.
It’s a hollowing experience. After I punched him, though, I felt 10000000 times better. I’m saddened that that’s what it had to come to, but the actions of everyone around me indicated that handling it myself was the only option. Maybe everyone around was too fucked up to register what was happening; perhaps they thought it would be better if they minded their own business, I don’t know.
The best part, though, was that afterward, a guy with a bag of wooden fucks gave me one. He said I had zero fucks when I punched that guy, so here’s a fuck. That was genuinely the highlight of my weekend, and if anyone knows this zero fucks given guy, send him my appreciation.
Despite this interaction, I had the most incredible time for the remainder of my weekend. For this one jackass, hundreds of people were kind to me in small ways throughout the weekend. Shout out to all my Basshead headbangers and our new friends from New Mexico, Steve-O, and Alexis, who were ready to find Mo for a little ‘chat’ after we told them what happened later that day. Although we didn’t take them up on the offer, that’s the kind of showing up that I appreciate. I can’t wait to see you all underneath the electric sky again next year.
TLDR: I was groped by a stranger, no one batted an eye, then I punched him, and suddenly, I need to chill. Please don’t be a bystander. See something, say something.

Hi everyone,
I'd like to get this off my chest and ask for advice on things I may be able to do or even something to think about.
I'd also like to share a brief history of us for context.
We met about 5-6 years ago in Highschool and eventually became best friends, as far as I can remember. Our relationship has been platonic at least until 2 years ago which was when I think I've started having feelings for her.
I can't remember what changed, all I knew after knowing her for a while that I see something in her that I adore.
I chose not to say anything to for a while due to the fact that she was in a relationship. I respect relationships too much to become a problem or get in between of one because I've experienced first hand how it feels like when a 3rd party ruins a relationship.
Eventually they broke up and I mustered up the courage to confess to her how I felt. She was at a loss of words and didn't know what to say. I remember telling her that night she didn't have to say anything, just think it over. After a week or two, she asked me to meet her and she was quite drunk.
I might be wrong but I'm a firm believer of "Drunk words are Sober thoughts" just from experience of what people have told me while intoxicated.
She was a mess, but I wanted to be there for her. I remember she told me that she felt safe around me and if I do like her, then prove it.
It was very tempting but I did give her a kiss that night. She wanted to keep going and take it somewhere but I stopped it. It just didn't feel right and I didn't want to take advantage of her vulnerability.
We talked about giving it a shot and seeing where it leads to but unfortunately she spiraled down and got depressed and shut down all connections. We didnt talk for a while, next time we talked. I find out she was in a new relationship which of course sucked for me.
But I respect her decision. We started catching up and eventually she expressed that I was starting to become a problem with her current relationship as the bf doesn't like the fact with had a small history which I understand so I decided to back off because I would hate to be a problem in someone's relationship.
I got into a relationship of my own that lasted for about a year and my best friend and I didnt talk at all for that duration.
I got into a toxic relationship which pretty much controlled my social connections so going out after that relationship, I didn't have much friends to connect with and it was getting lonely.
I had no ill intentions and I reached out to bestfriend again, I just wanted my friend back. We started catching up again, all is good. I was even opening up to her all the shit I've been through from my previous relationship which a whole story of its own. I've compromised too much of myself, and it was never enough type of deal.
After a month and a half or so, I wanted to lay some boundaries given our past. As I came into some realization. I expressed to her that I don't think my attraction for her will change. My emotional and physical attraction for her is just a lot to simply just get over off. I told her that I will understand if she doesn't want to proceed being friends again because of this, but I can live with it as long as she's okay with it. I just thought it's something that should be said instead of keeping it in.
She thanked me for my honesty and after a week or so. She's been wanting to tell me about what she was going through but hesitant but finally decided to open up. She told me that she also broke up with her partner, just weeks/month apart after I ended mine due to same reasons, she had to get out of it.
I wasn't getting any ideas, and I just wanted to provide comfort and that's when things start changing.
One restless night, she was out drinking and I couldn't sleep and we started talking and she asked me to come at her friend's place where she was hanging out. I said sure, why not. But as soon as I came there, she was acting very different. More physical that she ever was towards me. We were sitting on the couch and she would lean on back on me and lean her head to either my chest or shoulders.
After they called it a night, we decided to hangout because she didnt want to go home yet. We hanged out and talked about a lot of stuffs and eventually talked about our friendship. She brought up that she never gave me the chance before because she was afraid of hurting me.
I told her that just sounds a lazy excuse, and Id rather risk getting hurt than not getting a chance with her.
On thing led to another, we were cuddling, I was embracing, providing her comfort and warmth. I tried preventing any sexual acts as I didn't want to take advantage of her current state, I tried to embrace her tightly and just give her comfort as she was having a rough time. But she's expressed to me how pent up she was and cant control herself around me.
I can only resist so much when someone is practically throwing herself at me.
After that, we officially became friends with benefits.
She's quite aware that my intentions with her is more than what we currently have. I do like this girl, a lot. But I've heard from people that we both practically doomed ourselves with our situation as it can only lead to either a long relationship or the friendship would be over once we meet someone else, as our new SO would most likely not be okay being close with FwB history.
Has anyone gone through this same thing and had a positive outcome?
Any advise or wisdom is definitely welcome, I apologize if I overshared too much details before I can get to the point, I just wanted to provide context. I'm happy to answer additional questions as well in exchange for your opinion.

I swear to god if TTPD wins album of the year and not this i’ll be AMAZED there’s not a single song on this album that is skippable. There’s no genre either it’s EDM, R&B, Pop, Hip-hop, Folk at same time but none of those at all simultaneously. Like she’s singing in a void creating something new.
A lot of the scales are borrowed from music of other cultures like how the phrygian scale common in middle eastern music was used at the end of blue. The beat on Diner was crazy. All of the songs are EXTREMELY WELL PRODUCED. Finneas was amazing.
This level of fineness on the production is usually found on hip hop albums but here we have it in whatever genre she just created. The transitions between the loud parts and silent parts are perfect and build upon one another.
Not only is the album unskippable all the moments are too. Like there’s not even a single part that isn’t satisfying melodically, lyrically, musically, ANY-ally.
Lyricism is CRAZY there’s no comparison.
It’s tied together insanely well with same melodies being used for different songs. The way lyrics from other songs pop up and kinda change the meaning of those songs.
She made an insanely good decision with the split of the songs where she can tell long stories and put 2-3 different distinct songs in a single track having different tempo, beat, instrument while remaining on the same topic which is also why i think it is short if it was conventionally split this would have around 17-18 songs.
The way each song has her feelings but then always transitions completely to her now changed feelings or perception about the same situations.
Not only that but despite each song being a very different topic:-
i) Skinny: Body image, fame, bullying
ii) Lunch: Queer anthem, chill, sexuality
iii) Chihiro: People changing, plot of spirited away, vulnerability in a relationship or the lack thereof
iv) Birds of a feather: homophobia, societal pressure, long lasting love, that dream love of your life
v) Wild flower: ex best friend, betrayal/guilt, confession
vi) The greatest: Self appreciation, dissapointment
vii)L’amour da Ma Vie: Jesse, satisfaction, goodwill
viii) Diner: stalker, obsession, frightening
ix) Bittersuite: Attraction
x) Blue: I think this summarized her whole life beautifully or where she is at in life
Despite all these different topics with all these different songs which are very very different from each other and have distinct and different parts within them the whole album has some sort of theme i can’t pinpoint but you can see how it is all connected i have never ever seen an artist summarize this much stuff about their life and still convey so many feelings and so much detail especially the use of colors in this song was amazing
i have never invested this much time writing about an artist but this album turned me from a casual fan to a diehard and i’m very much anti celebrity worship type of person but billie is just too beautiful which made me waste so much time writing this when i have a lot going on in life.
love the album and relate to a lot of parts can’t wait to relate to birds of a feather one day

So this time last year (May ‘23) I went to see HR regarding a hiring committee I was a part of and the favoritism they showed a candidate. The Director of HR, granted she was the only HR employee at the time, is this beautiful African American woman with big, bright eyes and a gorgeous smile. We talked about my committee and then we just talked about life. She was going through hard times. We ended up becoming fast friends. I would go and check up on her.
Fast forward to August, I went to go see her again. Just dropped in as a quick hello and was reminded how beautiful she was. The next week I saw her. She stopped by where I was standing in line for food and touched my shoulder, finger to skin, and I literally felt a spark go through me. She just stopped to say hi. I think that was the moment I couldn’t stop thinking about her. From that moment forward I started to go to her office once a week. We had great conversation. I was learning more about her. We had astrology in common. We learned about each other’s families. We both were having problems as she was on the edge of divorce. My love life at the time was nonexistent with my wife and crumbling. However I started to enjoy her company way more than expected.
Because of our interest in astrology I knew her birthday was coming up in October. I decided to buy her a birthday card with a gift card for a restaurant. Before I got out of the car I said to myself ‘I think I’m in love with her’. That’s when I knew I was in trouble. I had began to write poems about her (which seem to be therapeutic) and having non stop thoughts of her. Mind you I’m still going to her office once a week. I gave her the card. We are still talking. She’s still going through shit with her husband. I’m talking about her to select coworkers. I offered to buy her lunch, another way to spend time with her. Well turns out she had a meeting with our CEO and we would have had less than 10 minutes. I was devastated. Like seriously heartbroken. Thus began my limerence. I still went to see her every chance I got. Probably too much. She never told me to not come and see her. In fact it became ‘You should come by more often’. I did.
A conference that both of us and several other employees attended happened in late November to December. We were very connected at the hip. She flashed me her room number without saying a word. I chose not to go. Literally the week before during Thanksgiving two things happened. 1) I ran into a psychic who gave me a reading and told me not to sleep with her. 2) My wife and I had a devastating argument about the state of our marriage. It had went to shit when we started therapy. Skipping the fact that I didn’t go up that night we had a great time together. We spent an incredible amount of time together. It was fun. I felt incredibly refreshed having spent time with her. The one downside to the entire trip was that she told me she was reconciling with her husband.
I asked her out twice for a meal in December. She never gave a direct no, but created excuses. January came and she got sick. I texted her a lot checking in on her. When she came back I asked her if I texted her too much. She said yes. I completely stopped. I think my poetry ramped up more because of that. She also reminded me she was trying to reconcile with her husband. In the same breath she asked me how I was doing as I was newly separated. It became emotional.
The next event per se happened in February. After Valentine’s Day I went to see her. I asked how things were going with her and her husband. She said they went well. I had started talking with people on dating apps. I mentioned this to her and she seemed a bit bothered. I was surprised. Somehow my wife came into conversation and I told her that I talk to her more than my wife. She blushed! Despite having good moments with her I was heartbroken that her and her husband were doing well.
I didn’t go see her for two weeks. There was a function midday. She waved at me and I was excited to see her. When I started to walk towards her she turned around and ignored me. This hurt me severely as I have trauma from people ignoring me. I stopped going to see her again. She texts me for my birthday, granted it was a week late, but I was excited. This was the first time we had a text conversation in over two months. She mentioned that she had to take medical leave. Needless to say I was devastated. I went to see her and she was very sad. She started telling me about her family life as a child, but we were interrupted.
While she was out, a coworker started a meal train account for her so she wouldn’t have to cook. There was an area where you could buy DoorDash gift cards. I bought $200 worth and also sent $300 in visa gift cards via a coworker who would see her.
When she comes back to work she tries to give one of the gift cards back. I told her I wouldn’t accept it back.
I’m very in love (or limerence/infatuated) with her. I’ve tried dating other people, but that doesn’t help as I end up talking about her when asked is there someone else.
I want to ask her what her thoughts are about me, but I’m horrified that she thinks I’m a creep.

Should I tell you that i can’t sleep at night? Curious about your favorite color, your perfect sight? I long to know your top choice for takeout food, How your hair looks messy, on your worst morning mood.
Should I approach, and how, when walls surround you high, Built from past grips that weren't quite right,
From those who claimed love but didn't understand its weight, Love is more, it's in the caring acts both small and great.
Maybe love is brewing two cups of coffee, instead of one, It's asking if you've eaten when the day is done. It's knowing you forgot something as you walk out the door. If i could tell you I would let you know.
Love greets me in your morning, vulnerable and raw, In the simplest moments, love exists by an unwritten law.
Yet here I am, pondering if my feelings for you are true, Hoping not to be like others who never really knew.
So I keep writing, thinking of you as daylight falls away, When the night falls quiet, thoughts of you still remain.
And I’ll find peace knowing someone else loves you right, I wish I could tell you, but time seals it tight.
(Inspired on a W.H.Auden poem)

rant/vent
🔍I had pretyped this just ranting then I realized i can post it anonymously here bc i’m really struggling and would like some outside advice human to human feels like i’m gaslighting myself lol. They have supported me and given me everything I need materialistically and do what they are supposed to as parents in that aspect I am very grateful and appreciative of that. in no way shape or form will I ever complain ab them giving me food, shelter, clothes etc. I’m not seeking to be coddled or get sympathy either i just need to know if it really is that bad or am I tripping.
🔬emotionally manipulative & guilt tripping parents will be their own demise. lol. finally dropping that mask you have with them, making them look at themselves and see the torment i had to mentally internalize & take on over the years > sitting back & letting them continue their behavior and control to keep destroying your identity & self continuing to deal with immense shame, guilt, sadness, and anger because you know how they are and you think theres no point in opening up to them or telling them what they do wrong bc they always do the same shit & continue to blame you for everything. note this though when I finally released all my years of internalized emotions on them and started texting them very knowledgeable shit about themselves, how they treated me, my mom trying to control and ruin me and my girlfriends relationship when we first got together (+ we have continued to be together for 1yr and 3 months still going strong she ain’t ruin shiiiit) & shit talked my gf for no reason at all. When I started texting paragraph after paragraph (+ texting them back and forth.) I was met with my mom thinking something isn’t right regarding my mental health and telling my dad and brother she thinks something is wrong with me again (she was surprised how I could speak so knowledgeable bc I barely even interact with them anymore) them texting my phone asking if everything is okay and they are worried ab me (she’s also made many comments before this situation like “you seem like you need to get back on ur medication you’re being irritable” etc when clearly that was the correct response to some fucked up comment she made i’m sick of that shit.) (sorry that was lowkey irrelevant but holy shit). them throwing what they do for me as PARENTS in my face, blame shifting, manipulation, lying, her saying she has no acknowledgment of ever treating me like that over the years, trying to ruin our relationship, or saying any of the vile shit she said about my gf. OH and how she thought It couldn’t possibly be me that’s writing these exceptional level paragraphs and she thought my gf was controlling me and making me send all of that to my parents(me texting her ab this shit went on for like 3 days, 3 days of her not taking accountability for anything, lying, trying to manipulate by making me feel bad as well and she had the nerve to say “it feels like i’m being abused” GIRLLL STOPPP HUH im still confused ab that one) it’s honestly sickening and baffling knowing ppl can think & say shit like that. i’ve been so detached from them since I was little (never knew why at the time) but THIS makes that detachment 100x worse and I feel like that’s a GOOD thing for me even though the outcome wasn’t what I wanted, bc i’m feeling free, released, not pint-up, etc most importantly more like I can finally be MYSELF!!! i’m way more comfortable in who I am and my Identity now at 19 could you imagine that like damn (just hoping it’s not temporary)!!! just putting this out there in hopes that someone else going through the same thing or similar will see and maybe help them a little. now i just gotta move out.
⚛️ she can’t see how what she says to people effects them drastically and takes 0 responsibility and acknowledgement of doing so and passes it off as “you don’t know me” “i’m a good person” “i have a good heart i love everybody” etc or blame everything on me for examples “we do everything for you” “you’re going to treat us like that when we sacrificed so much for you” etc um .. yeah they signed up for that when they decided to have a child so it’s fucked up to throw that in my face. THEN she loves to do this the most playing the victim card “you’re abusing me” “it feels like you are abusing me” “we feel like we can’t say anything right we are always walking on eggshells around you it’s exhausting” she knows damn well I’m not abusing her in any way shape or form that’s disrespectful to many people who actually had to go through and endure actual abuse. “do you want to hurt us? is that your goal” “you’re destroying the family” “you’re destroying our marriage” etc literally used to be all the timmmme when i was going through sh and stuff too. i didn’t do anything wronggggg all I did was speak up for myself FOR ONCE (bc it’s been YEARS) ab the shit she does and how i’m not okay with it i internalize literally everything (that’s y it took years. just sick of their shit idk what to do). low and behold after all that expressing I get met with all that blame shifting and lying. the reason why i never open up to her is bc when I do ever since i was little she always blamed me and made it seem like this whole other thing so hell yeah i’d rather internalize then talk to her that’s a way better option than getting met with guilt tripping and shit what else could I do but internalize n doing that fucked my head up BAD. there are MANY more examples of what else she would say and my dad too but i really think he’s brainwashed by her so idk that’s just off the top of my head .. lmao. she makes me feel so insaneee i even feel like i’m exaggerating and making a big deal n being too sensitive writing all this😵‍💫. there’s SO MUCH more context but fuck all that i typed enough. thx for coming to my ted talk🕷️.
🤢not to mention they are closeted RACIST & HOMOPHOBIC

So I have been thinking, and there is a concept that is just not really explored, the deeper consequences of the existance of an object (potentially obtainable on paper) that has tremendous power (power that is, at the very least, crudely but instantly usable for most if not all of the potential owers of such an object)
Yeah I know, it is not the thing most related to dragons... but you can see the ties if pay enough attention.
In fiction, such an object is often desired by the villain(s) and the heroes(who want to stop the villains from reaching it), but if you think about it, almost everyone would want to obtain such a thing (to be safe, to be the best, for honour and glory, to protect what they love, to have almost ultimate freedom), even if they do not the means.
So because of such an artefact's existence, we have a sort of challenge/opportunity that the world has to offer:
Go all in and risk everything, use all that you have and more to obtain ultimate power and realize your dreams/end all of your nightmares
Now, of course, that is an extreme, but the more informations you have on the all-powerful artefacts that makes it more concrete in your mind or closer to obtain (the location of such a thing), and the more this opportunity arise.
So I am asking, why is there not far more people trying to get closer to the artefact, why is there not a mass of people near the old temple, why is there no one that makes a suicide attempt on the heroes or villains to steal the object of power? If you have almost nothing to lose and everything to gain, the choice makes sense.
Now for a more philosophical/self reflecting approach...
Power exist in various form, but not all are equal.
You can have a lot of money or even political power, but these are far from being the closest form of power to you.
So in the "dull" real life (where technology brings a lot of comfort but is not great enough for... you will see), you could have so much money or have control/lead an entire country that saying you have the power of a god (a god being a very, very, very high amount of power) is not false.
But that is the fundamental thing, you have the power of god, but you are not necessarily a god.
But what if you could be closer to that?
A tool is useful craft, something that can change how you think and one that you can learn how to use it, similar to how you train your body. A tool is form of power very close to you, so close it could be called an extension of your being. So where does all of that reasoning lead?
The powerful artefact is an all powerful tool, meaning instead of having the power of god but greatly separated from your being, you have godlike power at in your very hands, and that will affect you more than anything in your life.
The only way to go even higher would be for you to literally become a god.
So thank you for reading this, and if you want to say something (like why is there no dragons?), you can write your words below.

Wanted to share our journey of building Tweetlio, our all-in-one solution for Twitter growth. It’s been a wild ride, full of ups, downs, and everything in between. We’re gunning for $10,000 MRR at launch, and we’re even throwing in a sweet 50% discount for our early adopters here on Reddit. Here’s the story.

How It All Started

So there we were, drowning in Twitter chaos. Crafting tweets, scheduling them, engaging with our audience—it was a full-time job. And let’s be real, we were failing at it. One night, my co-founder and I were ranting about how tough it was to keep up. That's when the idea for Tweetlio hit us. A tool that does all the heavy lifting for Twitter? Yes, please!

Building the MVP

We jumped in headfirst, coding like maniacs and surviving on coffee and ramen. Building Tweetlio wasn’t a walk in the park. We wanted it to write and craft tweets, schedule them, and even engage with followers. Oh, and let’s not forget the 10,000+ viral tweet database we included to help users get more traction.
The first version? Total mess. Bugs everywhere. But we kept at it, fixing one issue after another. We reached out to anyone who would listen, trying to get feedback and users. It was exhausting, but slowly, it started to come together.

Testing the Product Beta

Convincing people to try Tweetlio was tough. We got ghosted more times than I can count. But then we started getting some wins. Users were loving the auto-engagement features and the viral tweet database. Seeing tweets blow up and getting thank you messages felt amazing.
There were still setbacks. Our server crashed during a demo with a big potential client. Talk about embarrassing. But every failure taught us something, and we came back stronger.

Building Our Community

The real magic happened when we focused on our community. We started holding virtual hangouts, sharing tips, and celebrating each other’s wins. Some of our beta users have been using Tweetlio to grow their followers by crafting new tweets from our viral tweet database and scheduling them for optimal times. Seeing their follower counts increase and their engagement levels rise has been incredibly rewarding.

The Big Goal: $10,000 MRR

Now, we’re aiming high. We’re gunning for $10,000 in monthly recurring revenue at launch. It’s ambitious, but we believe in Tweetlio. To sweeten the deal, we’re offering a 50% discount to our early adopters here on Reddit. You guys believed in us first, and we want to give back.
We also thinking of giving on Product hunt the same offer and other place but still not sure. The Growth plan is of 99$

My Experience:

1. Embrace the Grind: Building something great takes time and effort. There will be long nights and setbacks, but keep pushing.
2. Listen to Feedback: Your users are your best resource. Listen to them, learn from them, and make improvements.
3. Build a Community: Engage with your users and create a space where they can connect and share.
4. Stay Resilient: Failures are part of the process. Learn from them and keep moving forward.
5. Believe in Your Vision: If you’re passionate about your idea, others will be too. Keep that fire burning.

Soory for any typo.
Thanks for reading, Reddit! If you’re looking to up your Twitter game, come check out Tweetlio. We’ve got your back.

Wanted to share our journey of building Tweetlio, our all-in-one solution for Twitter growth. It’s been a wild ride, full of ups, downs, and everything in between. We’re gunning for $10,000 MRR at launch, and we’re even throwing in a sweet 50% discount for our early adopters here on Reddit. Here’s the story.

How It All Started

So there we were, drowning in Twitter chaos. Crafting tweets, scheduling them, engaging with our audience—it was a full-time job. And let’s be real, we were failing at it. One night, my co-founder and I were ranting about how tough it was to keep up. That's when the idea for Tweetlio hit us. A tool that does all the heavy lifting for Twitter? Yes, please!

Building the MVP

We jumped in headfirst, coding like maniacs and surviving on coffee and ramen. Building Tweetlio wasn’t a walk in the park. We wanted it to write and craft tweets, schedule them, and even engage with followers. Oh, and let’s not forget the 10,000+ viral tweet database we included to help users get more traction.
The first version? Total mess. Bugs everywhere. But we kept at it, fixing one issue after another. We reached out to anyone who would listen, trying to get feedback and users. It was exhausting, but slowly, it started to come together.

Testing the Product Beta

Convincing people to try Tweetlio was tough. We got ghosted more times than I can count. But then we started getting some wins. Users were loving the auto-engagement features and the viral tweet database. Seeing tweets blow up and getting thank you messages felt amazing.
There were still setbacks. Our server crashed during a demo with a big potential client. Talk about embarrassing. But every failure taught us something, and we came back stronger.

Building Our Community

The real magic happened when we focused on our community. We started holding virtual hangouts, sharing tips, and celebrating each other’s wins. Some of our beta users have been using Tweetlio to grow their followers by crafting new tweets from our viral tweet database and scheduling them for optimal times. Seeing their follower counts increase and their engagement levels rise has been incredibly rewarding.

The Big Goal: $10,000 MRR

Now, we’re aiming high. We’re gunning for $10,000 in monthly recurring revenue at launch. It’s ambitious, but we believe in Tweetlio. To sweeten the deal, we’re offering a 50% discount to our early adopters here on Reddit. You guys believed in us first, and we want to give back.
We also thinking of giving on Product hunt the same offer and other place but still not sure. The Growth plan is of 99$

My Experience:

1. Embrace the Grind: Building something great takes time and effort. There will be long nights and setbacks, but keep pushing.
2. Listen to Feedback: Your users are your best resource. Listen to them, learn from them, and make improvements.
3. Build a Community: Engage with your users and create a space where they can connect and share.
4. Stay Resilient: Failures are part of the process. Learn from them and keep moving forward.
5. Believe in Your Vision: If you’re passionate about your idea, others will be too. Keep that fire burning.

Soory for any typo.
Thanks for reading, Reddit! If you’re looking to up your Twitter game, come check out Tweetlio. We’ve got your back.

rant/vent
🔍I had pretyped this just ranting then I realized i can post it anonymously here bc i’m really struggling and would like some outside advice human to human feels like i’m gaslighting myself lol. They have supported me and given me everything I need materialistically and do what they are supposed to as parents in that aspect I am very grateful and appreciative of that. in no way shape or form will I ever complain ab them giving me food, shelter, clothes etc. I’m not seeking to be coddled or get sympathy either i just need to know if it really is that bad or am I tripping.
🔬emotionally manipulative & guilt tripping parents will be their own demise. lol. finally dropping that mask you have with them, making them look at themselves and see the torment i had to mentally internalize & take on over the years > sitting back & letting them continue their behavior and control to keep destroying your identity & self continuing to deal with immense shame, guilt, sadness, and anger because you know how they are and you think theres no point in opening up to them or telling them what they do wrong bc they always do the same shit & continue to blame you for everything. note this though when I finally released all my years of internalized emotions on them and started texting them very knowledgeable shit about themselves, how they treated me, my mom trying to control and ruin me and my girlfriends relationship when we first got together (+ we have continued to be together for 1yr and 3 months still going strong she ain’t ruin shiiiit) & shit talked my gf for no reason at all. When I started texting paragraph after paragraph (+ texting them back and forth.) I was met with my mom thinking something isn’t right regarding my mental health and telling my dad and brother she thinks something is wrong with me again (she was surprised how I could speak so knowledgeable bc I barely even interact with them anymore) them texting my phone asking if everything is okay and they are worried ab me (she’s also made many comments before this situation like “you seem like you need to get back on ur medication you’re being irritable” etc when clearly that was the correct response to some fucked up comment she made i’m sick of that shit.) (sorry that was lowkey irrelevant but holy shit). them throwing what they do for me as PARENTS in my face, blame shifting, manipulation, lying, her saying she has no acknowledgment of ever treating me like that over the years, trying to ruin our relationship, or saying any of the vile shit she said about my gf. OH and how she thought It couldn’t possibly be me that’s writing these exceptional level paragraphs and she thought my gf was controlling me and making me send all of that to my parents(me texting her ab this shit went on for like 3 days, 3 days of her not taking accountability for anything, lying, trying to manipulate by making me feel bad as well and she had the nerve to say “it feels like i’m being abused” GIRLLL STOPPP HUH im still confused ab that one) it’s honestly sickening and baffling knowing ppl can think & say shit like that. i’ve been so detached from them since I was little (never knew why at the time) but THIS makes that detachment 100x worse and I feel like that’s a GOOD thing for me even though the outcome wasn’t what I wanted, bc i’m feeling free, released, not pint-up, etc most importantly more like I can finally be MYSELF!!! i’m way more comfortable in who I am and my Identity now at 19 could you imagine that like damn (just hoping it’s not temporary)!!! just putting this out there in hopes that someone else going through the same thing or similar will see and maybe help them a little. now i just gotta move out.
⚛️ she can’t see how what she says to people effects them drastically and takes 0 responsibility and acknowledgement of doing so and passes it off as “you don’t know me” “i’m a good person” “i have a good heart i love everybody” etc or blame everything on me for examples “we do everything for you” “you’re going to treat us like that when we sacrificed so much for you” etc um .. yeah they signed up for that when they decided to have a child so it’s fucked up to throw that in my face. THEN she loves to do this the most playing the victim card “you’re abusing me” “it feels like you are abusing me” “we feel like we can’t say anything right we are always walking on eggshells around you it’s exhausting” she knows damn well I’m not abusing her in any way shape or form that’s disrespectful to many people who actually had to go through and endure actual abuse. “do you want to hurt us? is that your goal” “you’re destroying the family” “you’re destroying our marriage” etc literally used to be all the timmmme when i was going through sh and stuff too. i didn’t do anything wronggggg all I did was speak up for myself FOR ONCE (bc it’s been YEARS) ab the shit she does and how i’m not okay with it i internalize literally everything (that’s y it took years. just sick of their shit idk what to do). low and behold after all that expressing I get met with all that blame shifting and lying. the reason why i never open up to her is bc when I do ever since i was little she always blamed me and made it seem like this whole other thing so hell yeah i’d rather internalize then talk to her that’s a way better option than getting met with guilt tripping and shit what else could I do but internalize n doing that fucked my head up BAD. there are MANY more examples of what else she would say and my dad too but i really think he’s brainwashed by her so idk that’s just off the top of my head .. lmao. she makes me feel so insaneee i even feel like i’m exaggerating and making a big deal n being too sensitive writing all this😵‍💫. there’s SO MUCH more context but fuck all that i typed enough. thx for coming to my ted talk🕷️.

Wanted to share our journey of building Tweetlio, our all-in-one solution for Twitter growth. It’s been a wild ride, full of ups, downs, and everything in between. We’re gunning for $10,000 MRR at launch, and we’re even throwing in a sweet 50% discount for our early adopters here on Reddit. Here’s the story.

How It All Started

So there we were, drowning in Twitter chaos. Crafting tweets, scheduling them, engaging with our audience—it was a full-time job. And let’s be real, we were failing at it. One night, my co-founder and I were ranting about how tough it was to keep up. That's when the idea for Tweetlio hit us. A tool that does all the heavy lifting for Twitter? Yes, please!

Building the MVP

We jumped in headfirst, coding like maniacs and surviving on coffee and ramen. Building Tweetlio wasn’t a walk in the park. We wanted it to write and craft tweets, schedule them, and even engage with followers. Oh, and let’s not forget the 10,000+ viral tweet database we included to help users get more traction.
The first version? Total mess. Bugs everywhere. But we kept at it, fixing one issue after another. We reached out to anyone who would listen, trying to get feedback and users. It was exhausting, but slowly, it started to come together.

Testing the Product Beta

Convincing people to try Tweetlio was tough. We got ghosted more times than I can count. But then we started getting some wins. Users were loving the auto-engagement features and the viral tweet database. Seeing tweets blow up and getting thank you messages felt amazing.
There were still setbacks. Our server crashed during a demo with a big potential client. Talk about embarrassing. But every failure taught us something, and we came back stronger.

Building Our Community

The real magic happened when we focused on our community. We started holding virtual hangouts, sharing tips, and celebrating each other’s wins. Some of our beta users have been using Tweetlio to grow their followers by crafting new tweets from our viral tweet database and scheduling them for optimal times. Seeing their follower counts increase and their engagement levels rise has been incredibly rewarding.

The Big Goal: $10,000 MRR

Now, we’re aiming high. We’re gunning for $10,000 in monthly recurring revenue at launch. It’s ambitious, but we believe in Tweetlio. To sweeten the deal, we’re offering a 50% discount to our early adopters here on Reddit. You guys believed in us first, and we want to give back.
We also thinking of giving on Product hunt the same offer and other place but still not sure. The Growth plan is of 99$

My Experience:

1. Embrace the Grind: Building something great takes time and effort. There will be long nights and setbacks, but keep pushing.
2. Listen to Feedback: Your users are your best resource. Listen to them, learn from them, and make improvements.
3. Build a Community: Engage with your users and create a space where they can connect and share.
4. Stay Resilient: Failures are part of the process. Learn from them and keep moving forward.
5. Believe in Your Vision: If you’re passionate about your idea, others will be too. Keep that fire burning.

Soory for any typo.
Thanks for reading, Reddit! If you’re looking to up your Twitter game, come check out Tweetlio. We’ve got your back.

Hi. Kamusta? Ako eto, 7 years nang nasa ibang bansa pero hindi parin nakakauwi kahit magbakashon man lang. 28 January 2017, 1 week bago ako umalis papuntang Middle East, nag paalam na ako sa'yo, wala tayong formal closure. We didn't cry in front of each other when I broke the news to you pero kitang-kita ko sa mga mata mo nung mga panahong yun na feeling mo aalis ako kasi gusto kong iwasan yung mga problemang pinagdadaanan mo. I wasn't able to support you nor i-comfort man lang. If I just had a choice at that time, hindi ako aalis. Inisip ko rin naman kasi para sa atin din naman yun kung may babalikan pa ako. I left without looking back. 1 year after, nagchat yung close friend mo sa akin, nagkaroon din sha ng opportunity dito sa Middle East. Nagkita kami. Napag-usapan ka namin. The week before bago kami magkita, kwento ng close friend mo magka video call kayo pero lasing ka at that time kaya ang kumakausap sa kanya is yung bestfriend mo. Habang magkausap sila ng bestfriend mo, naririnig ka nila sa background. Sinasabi mo na "bakit ka umalis, Luis? (not my real name) Bakit mo ko iniwan? Mahal na mahal parin kitang gago ka! Hindi ako mag jojowa ulit kung di lang din ikaw" habang umiiyak ka. Hindi ko alam kung maniniwala ako. Pero wala naman silang rason para magsinungaling sila sakin tungkol sa sinabi mo. Naging matigas ako. Kahit na alam mo na nakarating na sakin yung sinabi mo, hindi parin ako nagparamdam. Kahit yung mga kaibigan mo, sumuko na sa akin. Pero kailangan kong gawin yun hindi dahil sa wala na akong nararamdaman. Kailangan kong gawin yun kasi ayaw na kitang masaktan. Ayaw kitang bigyan ng false hope. Gusto kita maging malaya. Gusto ko magmahal ka din ng iba. Sa 7 years, taun-taon kitang mine-message tuwing birthday mo pero puro reacts lang ang reply na nakukuha ko. Intention ko lang naman is to check-up on you at least once a year pero I think you're no longer interested. Nakakausap ko padin ang mga kaibigan mo, single ka parin sabi nila. Recently, stino-stalk ko yung social media mo. Ang pogi at hot mo na lalo. I think you are already happy with where and what you are right now. I think it is time for me to fully let you go kahit alam kong may nararamdaman parin ako sayo. Mahal padin kitang gago ka. Uuwi na ako in 7 mos. Gusto kitang dalawin sa clinic na pinagta-trabahuhan mo. 'Di ko alam kung magdadala ba ako ng flowers or pasalubong at least. Gusto mo ng sinu-surprise kita especially nung mga panahong tayo pa. Shet bat ngayon palang kinakabahan na ako? Kakamustahin kita. Tatanungin kita kung masaya ka. Siguro, makaka move-on lang ako kung meron ka nang iba. Pero for now, mahal pa rin kita.

Both you and your best friend have known each other for several years, so it was only natural that you thought of him to accompany you when you received two free tickets to visit the city's aquarium. Despite his hesitation, he eventually agreed to come along. As the date progresses, he even tries to confess something that has been on his heart for a long time…
Listen on YT here
original script by LilacTeaBag

I have already made short post that I finished series finale. I stiil feel sad, depressed and that feeling when tv show ended.... unbelievable how "The Shield" is stuck with me. Can't believe this journey is over.
I wanted to say so many things. Firstly, how can I miss this? I was too young when it came out, but I hear about "The Wire" everywhere even now. "The shield" feels like out of the radar all the time. WE MUST DO SOMETHING WITH IT! Please, just watch "The Shield"!
My friend told me to watch it and he stumbled upon this Tv show in one cool review that was left by some user (girl , actually) on my native language site about movies/tvshows.
When I look at some photos and pictures of "The Shield" I have thoughts that it is like CSI or some other typical cop show with nothing more. How wrong was I with such first impression.
What I really like that "The shield" has blu-ray release. So cool tv show is reinnovate for high quality format and has a lot of bonus features on blu-ray.
My friend also told me that I need to watch especially until Season 5 where it will be so high level quality writing that I gonna really appreaciate "The Shield".
As for myself, I fond of cinema. I just not go easy on any movies/tvshows. I am very nit-picking because I like to learn about cinematography, screenwriting, directing and so on. For me movies like the greatest art and I study movies as an art. That's why I feel bored about modern movies and TV shows. Screenplays are not bold, not so complex, characters feel flat and creators afraid to insult other races, woman right and so on. Many movies and TV shows of modern era feel convinient. I am tired of that. And I started to watch "The Shield" six months ago.
"The Shield" was aired in the right time! Year 2002 like "The Wire". From the pilot episode "The Shield" don't try to be convinient, it shows you what Vic and his team doing, what "The barn" doing everyday. Everything around characters feels not-convinient: drug-addicted, child trafficking, other awful staff around. Characters not just saint and clean, they do what they have to do like it or not as a viewer. That's what I wished for a long time. "The Shield" just clicked with me. I can't even imagine TVshow about cops can be on such level with great cast, great characters, really good screenwriting, directing and editing.
Before "The Shield" I can't tolerate semi-documentary cinematography and "hand-held" effect of camera in movies. In "The Shield" I fall in love with such camerawork and editing. That's really what I can't imagine I would love in cinemas. In this Tv show every take is so close, editiing beetwen close-mid plan camera panning and it feels so great in terms of "The Shield" storytellling. You are always near characters, you like breathing just around their shoulders and see every bad side of Farmington so close that you feel how disgusting this district is. Incredible work from cinematographers and editors.
Dynamic feeling of everything that happens on the screen. The greatest part of "The Shield" it is never trying to dragging some melodrama to extend seasons or try to be sentimental in the scenes. Modern TVshows really like that and i don't. Don't need to play with the viewer. In "The Shield" everything happenes so fast, so realistic that sometimes you can't even catch a breath. Not a single dull episode. In every episode something cool will definetely happens and it keeps you attached to the screen. And I don't mean that "The Shield" hasn't some melancholic or not-fast pacing moment. On the opposite, "The Shield" has everything what makes cinema alive and fascinating.
Let me explain what I really like about "The Shield" and I have never experience such different emotions just in one piece of the cinema:
In "The Shield" you can feel like a kid again and rooting for cool-masculine guys who breaks door and shout: "Police! On the ground!". After some episodes I really wanna just play in cops and criminals on my yard with friends. That's how action feels in this Tv show. I wanna buy merch with "Strike Team" on it and snake eating rat logo. Incredible.
In "The Shield" as an adult you can feel totally devastated by events that just happened on the screen. You can feel pure emotions from character actions. And what most important you don't want to judge character right away you want to put yourself in his shoes because what character did feels so realistic. Characters here not some fancy cards, you can feel them like real human beings.
In "The Shield" you can laugh as an adult. Humor in some scenes and from some characters really spot on and not stupid. It is full drama but some episodes has great humor parts. And again it feels so real and natural like human beings in real life would joke about something. Bilings sutuations and lines from later seasons are just pure gold.
In "The Shield" you want to discuss some parts of the story. It feels like after reading a good complex books with interesting characters you start to think about their actions and how you can think about your actions in the real life. What it is like to be a coward? To be hypocrite? What about loayalty and friendship? Trust me not so many movies/TVshows can be so full-thinking. It's a miracle that such depth can be in cop TV show. I stiil can't imagine how believable characters are and situations in "The Shield". Script and story of all seasons and how characters arcs redeemed is golden!
So I trying to say "The Shield" can feel like popcorn-blockbuster cop show in some parts with overacting but sometimes it's pure complex drama with silence scenes and great acting and very realistic characters. It's the best mixture of movie formula that I have seen in my life! I stiil can't imagine that I saying such words in terms of cop TV show.
"The Shield" was ahead of its time. It is a real piece of art. In modern days I want to see Tv show with overacting (when it need to be done), cool action and the same time it can provide me with great drama sequences and believable characters.
[SPOILER] section below. Please read only if you watched the series.
What I also like about "The Shield" it has great leading character. Michael Chiklis was born for this role. Maybe in first seasons you can think he overacting sometimes and can't be so dramatic but in the late seasons Michael have shown one of the best acting scenes in cinema. Pure mastery. This 42 second silence in front of Olivia was something unique and incredible. Then final eyes scene with Cloudette and finale running eyes scene in the ending of season 7 when he sits alone.
Vic is so well written in every season. He is the anchor of the show. So charismatic, strategy wise, musculine and cool and what I like the most this character feels real. When Vic came alone in gang territory and didn't fear anything you believe in that. You understand as a viewer that not anybody in "the barn" have balls for things that Mackey can do. He uses "shortcuts" in police work that only he can manage. He has really metal backbone. Even when he mentally broke at the end of the 1st season he needs just a couple of minutes to grab his shit together and go further. Character has a great amount of willpower and dedication to do anything that he wanted to.
Vic is the greatest anti hero in cinema history. Many side characters hate him but when there is a problem that no one can resolve Mackey step up. Farmington is so dirty that it needs people dirty as Vic to clean it.
I actually always rooted for Vic as a viewer because nobody in "The Shield" is black and white. Even Claudette free Kleavon from death penalty to keep her warm place. And I like that "The Shield" shows every character is corrupt somehow.
But I can't believe that Vic betrayed Ronnie. It hits hard. After that I as a viewer understood Cloudette words: "Vic is trying to be someone he wants you to see him". We viewers see Vic true nature in the final episode and it hits hard too. He always was like that and we didn't want to accept. And some part of me like him but other part can't forgive him for what he did to others. Such a great character downfall through all seasons. And this shot when he smiled to his gun and go somewhere. Where did he go? He can't sit tight he always need to be "living on the edge" this his type of character.
I wanna write about other characters. Shane for sure. But Post is too big. I leave it for later.
10/10. I am empty and depressed that "The Shield" journey ended for me. Can't believe that many people don't know about this masterpiece. I am glad I stumbled upon it. It touched my strings for cinema love that not any movie or tv show touching in years.
So many emotions and thoughts. Thanks to Shawn Ryan, Michael Chiklis, Walton Goggins and every other member of "The Shield" crew and FX. I wish I had a chance to tell it to them personally. I am grown man but I feel emotions like a kid again. Pure emotions from "The Shield" story.
To sum up my words. I like this ending montage of Season 2. It has great editing and you feel emotions. I literally cried when I rewatched it after the final. Clodette touches Dutch and thanked him. Aceveda moving forward. Coriine in thoughts. Dutch investigate a murder again. And Pile of money scene... Vic the only one who is laughing but others feel mix emotions. Gives shivers to my spine.
The Shield - Overcome Season 2 Ending (youtube.com)