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Struggling to navigate things
2024.05.19 11:23 FullPop5032 Struggling to navigate things
Hi, I've been trying to figure out where I can express this post because my head and my heart feels like its in different places. I dated someone for a few months and it was a really wholesome couple of months. I think we have great chemistry, compatibility, and she has shown up me in ways that really made feel loved/appreciated/seen. For the first time in a very very long time, I felt like i met someone I feel compatible with long term. I've been in the dating for a while and I can say I have pretty good expectations with a potential mate and she has shown in many ways more than one what a great partner she is. I think she is a beautiful human inside and out, romantic feelings aside. It felt really easy with her until things had gotten more intimate.
When it did, she deactivated and withdrew for the first time. She met my friends, long story short -- she deactivated and instantly regretted the decision the next day. It turned my whole world upside down. I've seen very few glimpse of her fears and she did expressed them very early on in dating but told me she was addressing them. We talked about the importance of communicating and even did check ins but it never came up. I trusted her words because I felt like I was doing the same. I was working out my own wounding/healing outside of us. We tried working things out but she deactivated again a few days after and withdrew. After two weeks, i don't remember, she messaged me again and telling me things that she had missed me and she wants to be part of my life again but does not wanna continuously cause me pain. Which confused me. She acknowledges how much she has hurt me, has taken full accountability (which she has done since the beginning) and has not blamed me once, and recognizes she has a lot of healing to do and confront her traumas. We have not once been abrasive with words, yelled at each other, and there's no ill intentions/malicious intent involved. I have done a lot of healing myself and have done a lot of attachment healing as well. I'm finally at a point in my life where I feel secure, I can regulate myself, able to sit in discomfort, have a good head on my shoulders, show up, and soothe. I can tell that she is showing signs of an FA and she is recognizing for the first time that there are still a lot of wounds she needs to face that she thought she had healed from her last relationship (and from what i gather, probably her childhood as well, just an inkling).
What im really struggling with is, after that messaged I addressed with her that I cannot be in a cycle/pattern with her. I just know this is gonna keep happening over and over again unless there's work done. That right now, I don't wanna to be fully in her life and she had agreed to do only biweekly check ins and no contact in between, as i requested. I don't want to be in the same pattern over and over again and I had addressed that there needs to be changed that happens if we decided to ever try again. I did tell her that if she isn't at a point in her life that actively working on herself is a priority, I will respect that (i dont think there is anything wrong with that, our own journey is within our own time) but I dont want to be part of it because that would be a self betrayal to my healing. She told me she is starting to slowly address things, although therapy has not been started yet which worries me. But i know this is mainly because of her job that has her working 6 days out of the week which sometimes would lessen in some weeks but i know her capacity is probably not as much as a normal person.
I'm having a hard time because I really want to be supportive and be there while she figures things out but i also worry that I might be abandoning myself or spreading myself thin. I also lost my trust and feel like I can't rely on her right now but Im willing to work on that with her. Anyone had similar experience? Any partners that have worked things out with someone who have deep unhealed wounds? How did you manage it? I have also observed she struggles with stating her needs, boundaries, and not recognizing she is deactivating (im not even entirely sure if she knows that happening with her.) -- i think this is my main worry -- her not being able to tell me/communicate it when that happens. I only want to be in this situation if I can be a good support system for her and can show up that would be safe space for her and im trying to weigh if I can do that for her. I like her a lot and really want us to navigate things more healthily. Please be kind and respectful <3
submitted by FullPop5032 to ptsd [link] [comments]
When it did, she deactivated and withdrew for the first time. She met my friends, long story short -- she deactivated and instantly regretted the decision the next day. It turned my whole world upside down. I've seen very few glimpse of her fears and she did expressed them very early on in dating but told me she was addressing them. We talked about the importance of communicating and even did check ins but it never came up. I trusted her words because I felt like I was doing the same. I was working out my own wounding/healing outside of us. We tried working things out but she deactivated again a few days after and withdrew. After two weeks, i don't remember, she messaged me again and telling me things that she had missed me and she wants to be part of my life again but does not wanna continuously cause me pain. Which confused me. She acknowledges how much she has hurt me, has taken full accountability (which she has done since the beginning) and has not blamed me once, and recognizes she has a lot of healing to do and confront her traumas. We have not once been abrasive with words, yelled at each other, and there's no ill intentions/malicious intent involved. I have done a lot of healing myself and have done a lot of attachment healing as well. I'm finally at a point in my life where I feel secure, I can regulate myself, able to sit in discomfort, have a good head on my shoulders, show up, and soothe. I can tell that she is showing signs of an FA and she is recognizing for the first time that there are still a lot of wounds she needs to face that she thought she had healed from her last relationship (and from what i gather, probably her childhood as well, just an inkling).
What im really struggling with is, after that messaged I addressed with her that I cannot be in a cycle/pattern with her. I just know this is gonna keep happening over and over again unless there's work done. That right now, I don't wanna to be fully in her life and she had agreed to do only biweekly check ins and no contact in between, as i requested. I don't want to be in the same pattern over and over again and I had addressed that there needs to be changed that happens if we decided to ever try again. I did tell her that if she isn't at a point in her life that actively working on herself is a priority, I will respect that (i dont think there is anything wrong with that, our own journey is within our own time) but I dont want to be part of it because that would be a self betrayal to my healing. She told me she is starting to slowly address things, although therapy has not been started yet which worries me. But i know this is mainly because of her job that has her working 6 days out of the week which sometimes would lessen in some weeks but i know her capacity is probably not as much as a normal person.
I'm having a hard time because I really want to be supportive and be there while she figures things out but i also worry that I might be abandoning myself or spreading myself thin. I also lost my trust and feel like I can't rely on her right now but Im willing to work on that with her. Anyone had similar experience? Any partners that have worked things out with someone who have deep unhealed wounds? How did you manage it? I have also observed she struggles with stating her needs, boundaries, and not recognizing she is deactivating (im not even entirely sure if she knows that happening with her.) -- i think this is my main worry -- her not being able to tell me/communicate it when that happens. I only want to be in this situation if I can be a good support system for her and can show up that would be safe space for her and im trying to weigh if I can do that for her. I like her a lot and really want us to navigate things more healthily. Please be kind and respectful <3
2024.05.19 11:17 GuiltlessMaple Best Cardioid Microphones
 | submitted by GuiltlessMaple to u/GuiltlessMaple [link] [comments] https://preview.redd.it/8nkfks0ooc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=98151f985b2bdc3afd312e488992c3c98dcea249 Welcome to our comprehensive guide to cardioid microphones! Perfect for capturing clear and accurate audio, these microphones have become a go-to choice for many professionals and hobbyists alike. In this article, we'll be exploring the unique features and applications of cardioid microphones, as well as presenting our top product picks to help you make an informed choice. Stay tuned for all the details you need to know about these essential tools! So, whether you're a musician, podcaster, or just an audiophile looking to enhance your listening experience, our roundup of the best cardioid microphones on the market has you covered. Dive in to learn more about these reliable, versatile microphones, and discover the perfect option to suit your needs. The Top 7 Best Cardioid Microphones
Reviews🔗Insignia Wired Cardioid Omnidirectional USB Microphone with LED Indicatorhttps://preview.redd.it/e6w89f9poc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e52536d49670b6150bf957755f81409512d64754 The Insignia NS-LCBM22 Wired Cardioid & Omnidirectional USB Microphone is perfect for recording that vlog or podcast you've always wanted to start. With the user-friendly LED lights indicating power and muting, setting up is a breeze. The adjustable desk stand and knob make finding your perfect recording angle hassle-free. Featuring a cardioid and omnidirectional mode, this microphone captures your sound accurately and minimizes background noise. The included headphone jack lets you monitor your recordings in real-time for top-notch results. Although there have been some issues reported by users about the microphone suddenly stopping to work, overall, it's a highly recommended product within a reasonable price range. For those looking for a reliable and budget-friendly device, the Insignia NS-LCBM22 Wired Cardioid & Omnidirectional USB Microphone is an excellent choice! 🔗Nady CM 90: High-Sensitivity Cardioid Condenser Mic with Shockmounthttps://preview.redd.it/lekd5i4qoc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c07cf81b9c01b2650f9f991192465c017c9a5016 The Nady CM 90 Cardioid Condenser Mic has been a game-changer in my recording studio. I've been using it for capturing the nuances of my acoustic guitar, snare drum, and piano, and it never fails to impress me with its high sensitivity and extended smooth response. The microphone's sturdy turned-brass housing and internal shockmount ensure that it can withstand even the toughest recording sessions. I also appreciate the fact that it comes with a microphone clip, foam windscreen, and a zipper pouch, making it easy to transport safely. One of the standout features of this microphone is its transformerless design, which minimizes self-noise. This has allowed me to capture even the subtlest details of my performances without any unwanted background noise. Additionally, the microphone requires 48V phantom power, so it's compatible with most professional mixing boards. However, there have been a few downsides to using this microphone. For instance, I found that it can sometimes be overly sensitive to certain sound sources, making it difficult to achieve the perfect balance in my recordings. Additionally, the microphone's construction, while sturdy, may not be able to withstand the rigors of constant touring or frequent use in a live environment. Overall, I would highly recommend the Nady CM 90 Cardioid Condenser Mic to anyone looking to capture high-quality audio recordings. Its versatile design, rugged construction, and impressive performance make it a great addition to any recording studio or live sound setup. While it may have a few shortcomings, the benefits far outweigh any drawbacks, making it a top choice for any serious musician or audio enthusiast. 🔗FDUCE SL40X XLR Dynamic Microphone for Vocal Recordinghttps://preview.redd.it/0n1er5bqoc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f1d15f830e3d115673e9eb6d887d49ff6dd929c2 The FDUCE Sl40x XLR Dynamic Microphone has been a game-changer in my daily life. As a podcast enthusiast, I was on the hunt for a quality microphone that wouldn't break the bank. This microphone has exceeded my expectations by far! The voice isolation technology is the standout feature for me - it makes my voice sound so clear and pure, perfect for my podcasting needs. Setting it up was a breeze thanks to the plug and play compatibility, working seamlessly with my audio interface and mixer. The build quality is premium, giving me confidence that this microphone will last me for a long time. However, I would've liked if it included some free lessons or software, but that's a minor inconvenience. All in all, this microphone has enhanced my voice and has given my podcasting career a much-needed boost. I highly recommend it to anyone looking for a reliable XLR dynamic microphone. 🔗Unidirectional Condenser Microphone Bundles for Studio Recording and Podcastinghttps://preview.redd.it/65j6e8pqoc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4f0d24417d875b670a641689654d855d4a3d8f6c I recently purchased the Zingyou Condenser Microphone Bundle for my home studio setup, and I must say it has truly exceeded my expectations. I was initially drawn to its user-friendly design, which includes an informative assembly video and easy-to-follow instructions. In terms of performance, this microphone delivers excellent sound quality, capturing even the most subtle nuances of my vocals. The build quality is impressive as well, with a sturdy body that feels like it can withstand daily use without issue. One of the standout features of this microphone is its ease of use. Within minutes of unboxing, I had the entire bundle assembled and ready to go. Furthermore, the size and flexibility of the stand make it easy to position the microphone wherever needed, making it perfect for various recording scenarios. Overall, I believe the Zingyou Condenser Microphone Bundle offers exceptional value for its price, providing professional-grade sound quality and durability without breaking the bank. However, there are a few minor drawbacks worth mentioning. Firstly, some users have reported issues with the sound card not working properly, though I personally have not experienced this issue. Additionally, the microphone requires phantom power to function, which may not be ideal for those who prefer USB-powered options. In conclusion, the Zingyou Condenser Microphone Bundle is a fantastic choice for amateur and professional recording enthusiasts alike. With its affordable price point, top-notch sound quality, and user-friendly design, this product offers incredible value for its cost. So why not give it a shot and see how it can elevate your recording projects? 🔗AKG C414 XLII/ST Stereo Matched Pair Microphoneshttps://preview.redd.it/sc9u184roc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4e344495379a587088ceb09d35c96c15a1e63908 I've been using the AKG C414 XLII/ST Stereo Matched Pair for a while now, and I must say, it's a game-changer in my home studio. This pair of condenser microphones has a knack for capturing high-fidelity audio, making my recordings sound much more dynamic. One of the standout features of these microphones is their ability to switch between nine polar patterns. This flexibility allows me to tailor the sound capture for different applications, ranging from vocals to acoustic instruments like guitars or even percussion. The peak hold LED display is also incredibly useful, helping me avoid nasty overload peaks during live performances. The C414 XLII version stands out from its sibling, the C414 XLS, mainly because of its unique capsule design. This design gives the mic a slightly brighter sound compared to the XLS, while also offering impressive spatial reproduction that's reminiscent of the legendary AKG C12 microphone from 1953. On the downside, I've noticed that the C414 XLII can be quite sensitive to noise from surrounding sources, such as air conditioning systems. However, the built-in filter helps mitigate this issue, ensuring that my recordings remain clean and free of unwanted interference. Overall, I've been extremely impressed with the AKG C414 XLII/ST Stereo Matched Pair. It's a versatile, high-quality microphone that has made a significant difference in the quality of my recordings. While it may be a bit pricey, I believe it's a worthwhile investment for anyone serious about capturing professional-sounding audio. 🔗PreSonus PM-2 Matched Pair Cardioid Condenser Microphoneshttps://preview.redd.it/qpxp7gfroc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c6278ddb6105dfc0b988ac6239c627666c67775f As a reviewer who's been using the PreSonus PM-2 microphones in my little home studio, I can't help but rave about them. These cardioid condenser mics are a gem, offering a surprising level of clarity and versatility for a budget-friendly price. One of the things that stood out to me was their ability to capture even the most subtle nuances of the acoustic guitar. The cardioid pattern helps deliver an amplified input audio, making it perfect for recording a range of instruments and ensembles. The golden touch doesn't stop there. The gold-sputtered capsule ensures enhanced conductivity, enabling efficient signal transmission. And did I mention how light they are? The ultra-light chassis makes them incredibly easy to handle and convenient to use. However, as with any product, there are some cons. Some users have reported issues of durability, with one microphone stopping working after just six hours of use. While this is a concern, it's important to note that these are budget-friendly mics and may not withstand the same level of abuse as higher-priced models. Overall, I'd say the PreSonus PM-2 microphones are a fantastic choice for anyone looking to create detailed recordings in a studio setting. They offer great sound quality, especially when used in stereo mode. The build quality might not be top-notch, but the value they provide more than makes up for it. So, if you're on the hunt for affordable, high-quality mics, give these a try. 🔗Top-Ranking Karaoke Dynamic Mic with Shielded Cablehttps://preview.redd.it/yggyjzsroc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5b765ec15f5f3acc76725d974a3f559d2c708f40 I recently purchased the 5 Core Karaoke Singing Wired Mic, and I must say, I am thoroughly impressed! As a frequent performer at weddings and conferences, I needed a reliable microphone that captured my voice perfectly without any background noise interference. The unidirectional Cardioid Pickup Pattern on this microphone did just that, enhancing my performances and keeping the focus on my voice. One of the highlights of this microphone is its sturdy build. The steel mesh windscreen and anti-dent ring make it incredibly durable, while its professional XLR connector ensures seamless compatibility with all PA systems. I also appreciated the brilliant and transparent sound quality it delivers, thanks to its ultra-wide frequency response and built-in Pop filter & windscreen. On the flip side, the 5 Core Karaoke Singing Wired Mic might not be the best option for those who prefer a wireless microphone. Additionally, the lack of an on/off switch may be inconvenient for some users. Overall, I am extremely satisfied with the 5 Core Karaoke Singing Wired Mic. Its combination of performance, durability, and versatility make it an excellent choice for any singer or performer looking to enhance their live performances. If you're in the market for a reliable microphone that won't let you down, I highly recommend giving this one a try! https://preview.redd.it/4300n0esoc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2a3b4c5a8c34e693cde2efcc520e29b14602f005 Buyer's Guidehttps://preview.redd.it/kzn2o1lsoc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d73abb828c4fe25c4284c48ac4824f9f22b23f02 Important Features of Cardioid MicrophonesCardioid microphones are an essential tool for any recording setup, both in professional and home-studio environments. These microphones offer a directional pickup pattern, primarily capturing sound waves originating directly in front of the microphone while minimizing off-axis sound. This feature makes cardioid microphones particularly useful for reducing unwanted noise and echoes. Here are some important features to consider when looking for a cardioid microphone:
https://preview.redd.it/g3uj7i6toc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=99b03e03cc88b1b58fdcd4cf46a5f13316c60784 Considerations for Choosing a Cardioid MicrophoneWhen selecting a cardioid microphone, there are several factors you should consider to ensure that you get a microphone that meets your needs. These include:
https://preview.redd.it/sj9wdlitoc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4a75e0b020f01dad21b5a5f66caa72a74836a0de General Advice for Using Cardioid MicrophonesTo make the most of your cardioid microphone, consider the following advice:
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2024.05.19 09:15 ConsequenceSure3063 Best Cardboard Picture Frames
 | submitted by ConsequenceSure3063 to u/ConsequenceSure3063 [link] [comments] https://preview.redd.it/m8o1nk8s2c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a94ad95f9b1efef03101f1865a793b3e866b0d06 Looking for a unique and eco-friendly way to display your cherished memories? Our collection of cardboard picture frames not only adds a playful touch but also offers a sustainable alternative to traditional frames. In this roundup, we'll explore various styles, materials, and designs that will make your photos stand out, all while keeping your environmental impact in check. The Top 19 Best Cardboard Picture Frames
Reviews🔗DIY Cardboard Picture Frames (5 x 7 in, 30 Pack)https://preview.redd.it/ykdiw5ts2c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=bc90558603f175fc6641f2f7434acea9b5128073 I recently got my hands on Juvale's 5x7 inch Cardboard Picture Frames, and I must say, they've been a game-changer in my world of DIY home decor. With their bright colors and simple yet sturdy design, these frames are perfect for personalizing with jewels, glitter, and more. One standout feature for me was their ability to fit 5x7-inch photos perfectly. It's been great for displaying cherished moments around the house, just like snapping photos of our recent birthday party. The attached stand is convenient, making it easy to set up and show off your creations without needing an extra easel! However, there's a minor downside to these frames: their thickness. While they look sturdy enough, they might not hold heavier items such as thick cards or large paper cut-outs. Despite this, their durability has been impressive so far, even after a few creative paint jobs! Overall, I can't recommend Juvale's Cardboard Picture Frames enough. Their vibrant colors and simple design make them a perfect addition to any DIY home decor project or special occasion. So go ahead, unleash your creativity and make something amazing! 🔗DIY Picture Frame Kit with 50 Frameshttps://preview.redd.it/zd4zho4t2c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=91332a093d6f1fc2b97dbd2afa2a48547b4751eb As a creative individual who loves DIY projects, I recently got my hands on the Juvale Cardboard Paper Picture Frame DIY Hanging Kit (50 Pack) 4x6 inch, Black, White. From the moment I unboxed it, I could tell it was going to be a game-changer for my decorating needs. Each of the 50 paper cardboard photo frames comes with a mini clothespin and a piece of hanging twine, making it easy to display various memories and artwork around my home or office. One of the features that truly stood out during my use of this DIY kit was its versatility. Not only can you create unique framed pieces for any space, but you can also get creative and embellish these frames with different materials, like paints, jewels, rhinestones, glitter, labels, stickers, and more. I especially appreciated the fact that the frames can be displayed both vertically and horizontally, allowing me to experiment with different layouts and compositions. Another aspect of this DIY kit that I genuinely appreciated was its affordability. Given that I received 50 frames along with clothespins and twine, it gave me ample opportunities to decorate multiple areas in my house without breaking the bank. Additionally, the black and white color options make it easy to blend these frames into any decor style. However, it's essential to note a few cons that I encountered while using this product. Some of the cardboard frames were slightly thinner and more delicate than others, so extra care must be taken during handling. Additionally, the hanging twine provided could have been slightly longer for easier installation in various locations. Overall, I would highly recommend the Juvale Cardboard Paper Picture Frame DIY Hanging Kit (50 Pack) 4x6 inch, Black, White for anyone who enjoys DIY projects and wants to create personalized photo displays in their homes or workspaces. Its versatility, color options, and affordability make it a worthwhile investment in your decorating endeavors. 🔗Colorful Vibrant Paper Frames for Art Displays and Photo Props (24 Pieces)https://preview.redd.it/wb9rh4nt2c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2469a1f793f451a4cb42af6fb037248d9973273d I recently purchased these paper frames for my classroom decorations, and I must say, they have been a game-changer! The vibrant colors and fun designs instantly caught my eye. I particularly appreciated the two versatile sizes that could easily accommodate various photo sizes. The small frames were incredibly easy to use as they were designed with a photo space that perfectly fit a letter-sized paper, making it a breeze to display student artwork or use them as props for our fun photo booth activities. However, I did find that the larger frames needed some trimming and resizing to fit smaller images, but overall, they were still worth the effort. One minor drawback was the lack of a smaller size option, as I believe it would be even more versatile and useful in various applications. Nonetheless, these paper frames have significantly enhanced the appearance of my classroom decorations, and I look forward to using them in other creative ways. To summarize, the paper frames are an excellent investment for anyone looking to add a pop of color and creativity to their space. They are easy to use, have a sturdy cardstock thickness, and are available in a variety of fun designs. Although they may require some trimming for certain applications, the end result is definitely worth the effort. 🔗25-Pack Black Cardboard Picture Frames with Gold Foil Borderhttps://preview.redd.it/n8ytioau2c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=425a9d7bff8384bcf4180d9d0919c941db9b8136 As a cardboard enthusiast, I recently had the pleasure of using these elegant 8.5x11 black picture frames with gold foil borders in my DIY home decor project. The moment I took them out of their 25-piece packaging, I was instantly drawn to their timeless quality and that exquisite golden finish. One thing that truly stood out for me was how easy these frames were to set up. Their side-load design made it incredibly simple to display and switch between my favorite photos, without any hassle. Plus, the linen weave finish added a touch of sophistication to my space. Moreover, the frames come with a pop-up easel, which allows them to be displayed horizontally or vertically. This versatility made it easy to showcase both horizontal and vertical certificates or prints, in a professional manner. However, one minor con I experienced was that the window opening wasn't quite precise, and required a little adjustment to fit my 8x10 prints perfectly. Nonetheless, considering their excellent construction and affordability, these cardboard frames are definitely worth the investment. So, if you're in search of a cost-effective yet elegant solution to frame your memories or certificates, look no further! These cardboard picture frames deliver on both style and functionality, making them an ideal choice for anyone in need of a little DIY touch. 🔗DIY 5x7in Wall Paper Photo Frames with Flax String and Clipshttps://preview.redd.it/zduntwvu2c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3f355ea6dd5245f1924f8344fd4c043f985d0255 I've been using the Jahosin wall paper picture frames for a month now and I must say, they've significantly upgraded my home décor. The first thing that drew me to them is their unique DIY design with linkage mounted cardboard frames and flax string clips. The 30-frame set is versatile and stylish, perfect for displaying photos, Christmas cards, and artworks at events like weddings or birthdays. They're incredibly easy to assemble, each frame comes with its own clips and a piece of flax string, making it a fun project that the entire family can participate in. They fit standard 5x7 inch pictures, coming in three attractive colors - black, brown, and white. Their pure handcraft and non-toxic material make them a safe addition to any home, and the brilliant artwork on the fronts is a bonus. The only downside I've noticed is that the cardboard isn't the sturdiest, so they might need extra care when being hung or moved around. But overall, these picture frames have been a great addition to my home, adding a touch of art and creativity to my living space. So if you're in the market for unique, affordable photo frames, I highly recommend giving the Jahosin 5x7 inch wall paper picture frames a try. 🔗DIY 5x7 Photo Frames for Home Decorhttps://preview.redd.it/ftrv137v2c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=967e9bc07bde7b52dd9dcc15924751cc16ded1cc I recently discovered the Jahosin 5x7in Wall Paper Picture Frames and let me tell you, they've been a game-changer for my home decor. As soon as they arrived, I dove right in to create a unique and artistic display on my living room wall. The set of 30 frames comes in three colors and includes flax string and clips for easy mounting. The first thing that stood out to me was the pure hand craft element of these frames. Made with non-toxic, harmless kraft paper material, they're not only stylish but also safe for the whole family. The quality is evident in the craftsmanship and the vibrant printing patterns that bring life to my space. One thing I noticed is that these frames are designed specifically to hold 5x7in pictures, which made it difficult to fit some of my larger prints. However, this constraint did force me to be more creative with my photo selections, ultimately resulting in a more cohesive and eclectic display. Overall, I'm thrilled with my purchase of these DIY Photo Frames from Jahosin. They've added a unique and personal touch to my home decor while also encouraging me to curate a thoughtful collection of cherished memories. If you're looking to transform your living space, I highly recommend giving these picture frames a try! 🔗DIY 50-Pack Picture Frames for Wall Decor with Clips and Stringshttps://preview.redd.it/9bxajpjv2c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9094b6a76da4b746505626459b1d589da2f6dda7 I was recently looking for a way to display my favorite memories, and I stumbled upon the Juvale 50 Pack Paper Picture Frames. These paper frames added a personal touch to my home decor and were a hit at our family gatherings. First off, the variety and versatility of these paper frames blew me away. They come in 50 different colors, which made it easy for me to match them to my existing dcor. The mini clothespins and hanging twine included made it a breeze to create a stunning photo hanging display on my wall. Plus, they're perfect for DIY craft projects. I had a blast embellishing my frames with glitter, stickers, and paint. However, I found that the actual size of the frames was slightly smaller than I thought. But it wasn't a deal-breaker, as they still worked perfectly for showcasing my favorite photos. All in all, I'd highly recommend the Juvale 50 Pack Paper Picture Frames for anyone looking for a fun and affordable way to display their cherished memories. 🔗Customizable DIY Paper Picture Frameshttps://preview.redd.it/0dgwjo1w2c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1e26ee80ba0eb94e5a619d0c1079c3559c8f0e20 When I first tried out the Jahosin 5x7in Paper Picture Frames, I was pleasantly surprised by how stylish and creative they were. The handcrafted, non-toxic kraft paper material felt like a breath of fresh air compared to the usual plastic frames. The set came with 10 frames, 10 mini clips, and a string, making it easy to display photos, Christmas cards, and art works in a casual and artistic way. One of the key highlights for me was how easy it was to customize these frames. The DIY linkage design allowed me to arrange the frames in various ways, making them perfect for displaying memories during special occasions like weddings, anniversaries, birthdays, and graduations. Plus, they also added a touch of love, happiness, and wild living spirit to my space. However, I did notice that the frames are quite delicate, so they may not be ideal for families with young children who might accidentally damage them. Additionally, the kraft paper material can absorb moisture, making the frames more susceptible to warping or damage in humid environments. Overall, I found the Jahosin 5x7in Paper Picture Frames to be a comfortable and creative addition to my home decor, adding a touch of warmth to any space they were placed in. I would recommend these frames to anyone looking to display their special memories in a unique and stylish way. 🔗Customizable Kraft Paper Photo Frames (50 Pack)https://preview.redd.it/xh2lgs9w2c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1bd1f7831056776ccd5bc6afc7611a6982a2ee03 I recently used the Juvale Kraft Paper Picture Frames to decorate my living room and create personalized gifts for friends. The 50-pack is perfect for batch-making, especially when working on DIY projects. Crafted from cardboard, these frames are lightweight and easy to customize with paints, stickers, and other embellishments. One feature that truly stood out was the compatibility with 4x6 inch photos, which means I could feature a variety of images from different occasions. Additionally, the kraft paper texture provides a warm, rustic touch to any space. However, I must admit that the cardboard material isn't as sturdy as traditional frames, so they might not hold up well in humid or high-traffic areas. In conclusion, the Juvale Kraft Paper Picture Frames are perfect for DIY crafts, personalized gifts, and decorations. Their brown color and versatile size make them an ideal choice for various occasions and interior design styles. Despite the flimsy nature of the material, the ease of customization and affordability make these frames a worthwhile addition to your DIY toolkit. 🔗50-Pack White Cardboard Photo Picture Frames, 4x6 Incheshttps://preview.redd.it/4c3fylow2c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=40ca70b8c0efd0320f6d3d0f13206626e1d64806 As a frequent user of these 50-pack cardboard photo picture frames, I can attest to their ease of use. They are perfect for displaying your favorite 4x6-inch family photos, artwork, and memories. The attached stands allow for easy setup on surfaces like desks and tables, and you can unleash your creativity by personalizing these frames with markers, crayons, rubber stamps, colored pencils, and various paints. However, the one thing that left me unimpressed was the size of the easel. Though it held the 4x6-inch photos nicely, I wish it had a thicker and more professional appearance. The attached stand could be more sturdy, especially if you plan on using it for more presentable purposes like selling art cards. In contrast, I found that the frames were easy to customize, enabling me to express my artistic side while displaying my favorite memories. If you're looking for a quick and easy way to showcase your photos, these cardboard frames are a great choice. Just remember to handle them with care to prevent tearing if you decide to use them for more professional purposes. Overall, I've had a relatively smooth experience using these frames, but there's definitely room for improvement when it comes to their sturdiness and presentation. 🔗Personalized Eco-Friendly Paper Photo Frames (30pcs 4x6) for Wall Decorhttps://preview.redd.it/j4w29h4x2c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=52efbb82e79643186434cd45a45904d81dd703cc As an avid fan of unique wall decor, I recently stumbled upon the Cardboard Picture Frames 30 Pack. These retro-chic frames have quickly become a staple in my home, adding a touch of whimsy to my otherwise monotonous walls. Made from high-quality, recyclable paper, these frames are not only eco-friendly but also surprisingly durable. The matching wooden clips and string add a lovely contrast, giving my photos a charming, vintage appearance. The DIY nature of these frames is another highlight - they're incredibly easy to install and hang, making them accessible for everyone, regardless of their experience with DIY projects. These frames aren't just for personal use, they're perfect for gifting too. They're versatile enough to be used as wedding, engagement, anniversary, or birthday gifts. Their ability to add a touch of elegance and charm to any setting is truly remarkable. However, one minor drawback is that they're 4x6 inches, which may not accommodate larger photos. But overall, these Cardboard Picture Frames have been a fantastic addition to my home, adding a touch of personalized charm and retro vibe that I absolutely adore. 🔗30 Pcs Kraft Cardboard Photo Frames with Wood Clips and Jute Twinehttps://preview.redd.it/iuyowrgx2c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1f2a981cd5b427918fee4bc478ea26a13037cc72 I recently purchased the Novelty Bank Paper Photo Frame set and it has been a game-changer for displaying my favorite memories. The simple yet elegant design of these 30 kraft paper frames sets off my photos perfectly. The art paper used is thick and flat, and the full back protects my pictures from dust and oxidation. Measuring 6 1/8 INCH tall by 4 1/2 INCH wide, with a window sized 4 INCH by 3 INCH, these frames are the perfect accessory for adding a touch of charm to my rooms and walls. One feature I particularly love is the adjustable design, which allows me to customize the size of the window to fit different sized photos. The included wooden clips and jute string make it easy to hang these frames wherever I want, creating a visually appealing display that is sure to impress. However, I did experience a minor issue with the quality of the jute string. It was slightly frayed and snapped after a few uses. Despite this, the overall quality of the product more than compensates for this small flaw, and I highly recommend these DIY Cardboard Photo Frames for anyone looking to enhance their space with personalized memories. 🔗DIY Cardboard Easel Photo Frames (50 Pack) 4x6 Inches 10 Colorshttps://preview.redd.it/oaeqs2sx2c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4b8a13dccd18269a0890d944c225c5c21be7d388 I recently started using the Juvale Cardboard Photo Picture Frames to display some of my favorite memories and I absolutely fell in love with them. These little frames are not only versatile in terms of placement- standing vertically or horizontally- but also offer a variety of bright colors like yellow, light pink, and green, that make your photos pop. One feature that stood out for me was how easy they are to customize. You can embellish them with paints, rhinestones, glitter, stickers and other decorative elements, making each frame as unique as the person who owns it. However, there's a minor downside too. When using bigger hands, inserting the photos into the frame can be a bit challenging. But other than that, these photo frames are perfect for displaying your special memories! I've used these photo frames for displaying my daughter's adorable drawings, my favorite wedding photos, and even used them as party decorations. They really brighten up any space! If you're looking to add a touch of personalization and color to your photos, the Juvale Cardboard Photo Picture Frames won't disappoint you! Buyer's GuideWhether you're looking to add a unique touch to your home decor or wanting to gift someone special, cardboard picture frames are an affordable and eco-friendly option. This buyer's guide will take you through the important features, considerations, and general advice about choosing the perfect cardboard picture frame for your needs.Features to Considerhttps://preview.redd.it/33ldsr213c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f159cb1b1d52506969e96b7d953f0c105979896d
ConsiderationsWhen selecting cardboard picture frames, it's essential to think about how they will be displayed. If you plan to hang them on a wall, ensure they have an integrated hanging mechanism or that you can easily attach one. Additionally, consider the durability of the cardboard material, especially if the frame will be exposed to varying temperatures or humidity levels.General Advice
https://preview.redd.it/8pt3crh13c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=79436cee148e7778d97f678aeed5f805c9c536b1 FAQ1. What are cardboard picture frames?Cardboard picture frames are affordable, lightweight, and eco-friendly alternatives to traditional frames made from wood, metal, or plastic. They are often customizable and can display photos or artwork in various sizes.2. How do cardboard picture frames compare to other types of frames?https://preview.redd.it/naxaprv13c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=89ec506e34f468bacdd367f2e82950d8ef2a475c Cardboard frames are generally more affordable and lightweight than other types of frames. However, they may not offer the same level of durability or sturdiness as wood or metal frames. Cardboard frames are also eco-friendly, as they use recycled materials in their construction. 3. Are cardboard picture frames customizable?Yes, many cardboard picture frames come with the option for customization. This may include choosing between different colors, patterns, or sizes. Some cardboard frames also allow for personalized messages or designs on the frame itself.4. Can cardboard picture frames display photos and artwork?Yes, cardboard picture frames can display both photos and artwork, depending on the design of the frame. Some frames come with adjustable stands or hooks, allowing them to be displayed on tables, shelves, or walls. https://preview.redd.it/1enr5q923c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=03e6f94c4fee79b3311c7e5157c06c21388d3e96 5. How do I care for my cardboard picture frame?To care for your cardboard picture frame, handle it gently and avoid exposing it to excessive moisture or heat. Dust the frame regularly with a soft brush or cloth and store it in a cool, dry place when not in use.6. How much do cardboard picture frames cost?The cost of cardboard picture frames varies depending on the design, size, and customization options. Generally, they are more affordable than traditional frames made from wood, metal, or plastic.7. Where can I purchase cardboard picture frames?Cardboard picture frames can be purchased at various stores, both online and offline, that specialize in home decor, stationery, and art supplies. Major retailers and marketplaces like Amazon and Etsy also offer a wide selection of cardboard picture frames.8. Are cardboard picture frames suitable for outdoor use?While some cardboard frames may be suitable for indoor use, it is not recommended to use them outdoors, as they are more susceptible to moisture damage and less able to withstand harsh weather conditions compared to traditional frames.9. Can I recycle a cardboard picture frame?Yes, cardboard picture frames are generally made from recycled materials and can be recycled again at the end of their useful life. Ensure that you recycle the frame with other paper products, following your local recycling guidelines.10. How do I assemble a cardboard picture frame?Assembling a cardboard picture frame usually involves a few simple steps, such as sliding the photo or artwork into the frame, attaching the back panel, and securing any hooks or stands for display.
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2024.05.19 09:11 Significant-Tower146 Best Card Holder Keychain
 | submitted by Significant-Tower146 to u/Significant-Tower146 [link] [comments] https://preview.redd.it/0mol3c982c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b0742a0f7ccfccf26ec31dd3b2513d760c35635b Get ready to organize your essentials with ease using our curated collection of Card Holder Keychains. In this article, we bring you the top picks that not only keep your credit cards safe but also add a touch of style to your everyday carry. The Top 5 Best Card Holder Keychain
Reviews🔗Stylish Card Holder Keychain with Confetti Fillinghttps://preview.redd.it/7w2qk4n82c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0d341c32113de84b0e7c17f059551187041eed70 The Confetti Mini Wallet Keychain is the perfect addition to any gameday outfit. Its adorable design, filled with eye-catching confetti, adds a touch of excitement to your look. Measuring 4.5 inches by 3.5 inches, this compact keychain fits perfectly in your pocket and ensures you never misplace your ID or credit cards again. Made from durable nylon and clear vinyl, it's easy to clean and withstands frequent use. The gold-plated hardware adds a touch of elegance, making it a versatile accessory for any occasion. During my experience with this stunning product, I found the confetti inside to be a unique feature that sets it apart from other wallet keychains. Despite being made of clear vinyl, the confetti never falls out, making it a practical and stylish choice. The gold-plated hardware adds a sense of luxury to the keychain, and the nylon material ensures durability. While it was a bit challenging to retrieve my cards from the wallet, the confetti pattern on the inside adds a playful touch and makes up for the inconvenience. Overall, the Confetti Mini Wallet Keychain is a must-have accessory for any sports fan looking to add flair to their gameday outfit. 🔗Stylish Daisy Darling Card Holder Keychain for Secure Storage and Elegant Appealhttps://preview.redd.it/a85ia35c2c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ac502155a8e6f7aad7a3e63c2eb6be72ce375648 The Taylor Elliot Designs Daisy Darling Card Holder Keychain has been a game-changer for me in my daily life. This little gem is not only a functional card holder, but it doubles as a keychain, making it perfect for on-the-go situations. The embroidered daisy pattern on the front adds a charming touch, while the blue gingham pattern on the backside keeps things practical and stylish. The durable cotton canvas material makes it sturdy and long-lasting, ensuring that my cards stay safe inside. What really stands out for me is the gold zipper accents and gold keychain clasp on the zipper. They add a touch of elegance and sophistication to my look, making this card holder more than just a practical accessory. I also love the colorful yarn and tinsel pom pom, along with the acrylic pink heart and daisy keychain included. It really makes a statement and adds a pop of color to my outfit. Overall, the Taylor Elliot Designs Daisy Darling Card Holder Keychain is a great addition to my daily life, offering both functionality and a touch of style. However, one downside is that the size might be a bit too small for those who need to carry multiple cards at once. But for me, it's been a perfect match, and I highly recommend it to anyone looking for a versatile and fashionable card holder keychain! 🔗Chic Starry Card Holder & Key Ring Duohttps://preview.redd.it/7ec3r9gc2c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b1acaf4d754b315263c5623ca4f531e3711daa07 Embark on a mystical journey with the Starred Keyring and Card Holder set from Ted Baker. These chic accessories are sure to become your go-to companions when stepping out into the world. Crafted from velvety faux leather, this set offers more than just style. As you hold the bifold wallet in your hand, you'll notice its carefully designed card slots and ID window, making it easy and secure to carry your essentials. The vibrant star pattern on the card holder adds a touch of whimsy to your daily routine. And to top it off, the star-shaped keyring will dazzle you each time it catches the light. However, be aware that this luxurious set may not be as practical as some would hope. The dimensions of the keyring and card wallet might be slightly larger than necessary, making them less than ideal if you're looking for a more compact solution. And while the lining is made of tough 100% polyester, it could have been made with a softer material for added comfort. In conclusion, the Star Keyring and Card Holder set from Ted Baker offers a delightful fusion of elegance and mystique. Though it may not be the most practical option, its combination of style and functionality makes it a captivating choice for those who crave something out of the ordinary. 🔗Stylish RFID-Blocking Slim Keychain Wallethttps://preview.redd.it/mkxgb5vc2c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6d5bf5c7de974d164c43d2abfe5f3735c610d6f3 I recently gave the Zario Slim Keychain Wallet Lanyard a try and was pleasantly surprised by its minimalist yet functional design. The first thing I noticed was the premium quality material it's made of, which gave me confidence in its durability. I loved that it could hold up to 2 credit cards securely, with the added peace of mind that the back pocket is RFID-blocking to protect my personal information. One of the standout highlights of this product is its unique style. It's not just a functional wallet on a keychain, but it also adds a touch of elegance to my daily look. However, I noticed that it could be a bit tricky to use one-handed, which might be an issue for some. Overall, I found the Zario Slim Keychain Wallet Lanyard to be a great investment for anyone looking for both style and practicality in their everyday carry. 🔗RFID Blocking FurArt Card Wallet with Key Ringhttps://preview.redd.it/j9beqgcd2c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=50390e6c03df5ffa8d90102f4302db74a842855c For someone on the go, the FurArt Credit Card Wallet is a perfect companion. I use it daily and was drawn to its sleek and attractive design. It's compact enough to fit in any pocket or purse while still offering plenty of space for cards and cash. A feature I love is the RFID blocking technology. This wallet has effectively protected my valuable information from unwanted interference while keeping my items organized and secure. The extra key ring is a thoughtful addition, making it a versatile wallet for multiple purposes such as shopping or traveling. While small in size, this wallet has proven big on convenience and security. As a gift, it boasts a multi-color option and a classic, wear-resistant look that would suit any loved one, whether it's a man or a woman. Buyer's GuideA card holder keychain is a convenient and stylish accessory that combines the functionality of a keychain and a card holder in one. These handy devices allow you to keep your ID, credit card, and other small essentials close at hand without having to fumble through your pockets or purse. In this buyer's guide, we will discuss the important features and considerations when choosing a card holder keychain to suit your needs.Material and Durabilityhttps://preview.redd.it/wofs54sd2c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=aad2dedb27bfa2a85253cf1b9b7e910670b7a473 When selecting a card holder keychain, consider the material and durability of the product. High-quality materials such as metal or sturdy plastic will ensure that your card holder lasts for a long time. Make sure to choose a design with a secure clasp or closure mechanism to prevent your cards from falling out. Capacity and SizeConsider the number of cards you want to carry and the size of your keychain. Smaller keychains can fit only one or two cards, while larger ones can accommodate more. Ensure that the size of the keychain is comfortable for you to carry and does not obstruct your keyring.Design and AestheticsCard holder keychains come in various designs, shapes, and colors. Choose one that matches your personal style or the theme of your outfit. Look for one with a clean and minimalist design that will not clash with the rest of your accessories. https://preview.redd.it/ha3vwu8e2c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6d7a52da472b78c330293d5390f61180fcf3d455 Additional FeaturesSome card holder keychains come with additional features such as a LED light, a bottle opener, or a small tool. If you want these extra functionalities, make sure to choose a keychain that has the features you need.Price and Value for MoneyConsider your budget when purchasing a card holder keychain. While more expensive models may have higher-quality materials or additional features, there are also affordable options that can serve their purpose well. Look for a keychain that offers good value for money and meets your needs without breaking the bank.Brand and Reviewshttps://preview.redd.it/8iv38rie2c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=34036f3856c7d699876c194f7ddef8d8a825ba50 Research the brand and read reviews from other customers before making your purchase. A well-established brand may offer better customer support and warranty options. Reviews can give you an idea of the product's performance, durability, and overall satisfaction from other users. Buyer's ChoiceWhen choosing a card holder keychain, consider the material, capacity, design, additional features, price, and brand reputation. With these factors in mind, you can make an informed decision and select a keychain that suits your needs and preferences.FAQhttps://preview.redd.it/oxljcste2c1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0c04e30563fe007b1438e1adacec3ea1b8c839bc What is a Card Holder Keychain?A Card Holder Keychain is a multi-purpose accessory that combines the functionality of a card holder and a keychain. It is designed to hold credit cards, IDs, and other small cards securely, while serving as a useful and stylish keychain.What are the benefits of using a Card Holder Keychain?
How do I choose the best Card Holder Keychain for me?Consider factors such as the number of card slots, material, size, and design when selecting a Card Holder Keychain that best suits your needs and preferences.What materials are Card Holder Keychains typically made of?Card Holder Keychains are usually made from materials like metal, plastic, or a combination of both. Metal keychains may be made from stainless steel, zinc alloy, or other durable metals, while plastic keychains can be lightweight and more affordable.Are Card Holder Keychains durable?Yes, most Card Holder Keychains are designed to be durable and long-lasting. High-quality materials and robust construction ensure that the keychain can withstand daily use without breaking or losing its functionality.Can I customize my Card Holder Keychain?It depends on the product and manufacturer. Some Card Holder Keychains can be personalized with engravings, logos, or custom color combinations. Check with the specific brand or retailer for available customization options.Are there any safety concerns with using a Card Holder Keychain?Card Holder Keychains are generally safe to use, but it is essential to follow proper keychain usage guidelines to avoid injury. Make sure to hold the keychain securely and avoid sharp or pointed objects on the keychain from damaging or scratching your cards and IDs.As an Amazon™ Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases. |
2024.05.19 08:48 meowzzz4352 Thoughts on my Symptoms
Now that I discovered this community I am pretty confident what is happening to me is all tied back to this lovely little jaw muscle. I see my GP Monday 8am . Hoping for any advice - better details - corrections on my wrong assumptions or statements and ultimately a little reassurance and validation from yall , That what is happening to me right now is all connected and I am not crazy.
10 months ago I had my last 2 upper molars pulled the "ol fashioned" way with the wiggling and the tugging and the ripping and the "Okay now you're going to feel a bit of pressure" followed by the feeling that your jaw is in fact being ripped out of your mouth.
Things started mild 6 months ago intensified around the 3 month mark and now these last 3 weeks I can barely function. I feel the definition of "Malaise" hits perfect. I'm afraid to leave my house the head pain / brain fog has me feeling like I could blackout any second, And the whoosh / vertigo / world spins has me terrified of driving.
So here is what I'm feeling in order of how they hit , everything is on the left side if that matters
Shoulder Blade - Everything is felt along the bottom of the blade.
Jolt of fire and burning on the skin -- A tearing and ripping under the skin on the muscle - Starts to vibrate a tingling fire sensation outward in a semi circle
When I put my tens unit on there the flexing caused pain on the top of shoulder and collarbone.
Always strongest when I lift or carry, random bursts when I'm sitting doing nothing and now even the weight of my phone sends it to 11
Muscles Weakness and Tremors
When the blade pain is bad, I can barely grip anything with my hand, Hands tremble and different arm muscles randomly will twitch and flex.
My jaw is now (2 weeks) shivering / chittering (IDK wtf it is) as if im cold. Digging my fingers into the facial knots will stop it. Always hits when I first get out of bed, then a few times during the day no pattern in the trigger
Eyes/Ears
Couldn't keep my contacts in more than half day , left only felt cloudy hazy blurry - They are brand new lenses and Ive been use the good "eye juice" with no changes. Tried yesterday had to take em out within an hour.
Sharp twinge zap inside the ear - cold trickling sensation down the canal - ends with a punch of pain behind ear on the thick neck tendon
The Whoosh (Is this brain fog? Something else?) Zap / Jolt of electricity on top of my brain but under my skull - The whoosh when i see everything spin a 360 for a second - And ends with me "off kilter' for minutes to hours, As if there is a delay between what my eye sees to when my brain processes. During the spell ill feel "wonky" "Out of body" "tunnelly vision"
The Exploding Head
Its a constant feeling / sensation that my head is filling with sludge.
Forehead & eye have waves of intense dull aches, This part is killing so bad right now, even with NSAIDS it never stops having pressure just relieves it slightly. When it kicks hard and throbs my eyes go really fuzzy and that im going to blackout feeling hits. I have not actually passed or blacked out thank god - my cats would eat me alive in a day -
Jaw/ cheek & gums are twitchy with tightness/fullness and pointy pain shockwaves. The M in the TMJ is a ball of rubberbands and it is so very tender. My face does not appear to have anything swelling outwards from here but poking around in there i find tons of lumps I can break up.. Opening and closing i have full range I think and right now no popping or pains when i do. The area by my ear where the bones connect is so tender, but I dont feel lumps much here. I feel such relief when I hit here with my point tool.
Side of my Neck has small mushy lumps just under the skin and some big daddies deeper in and these ones get stabbyy pains that pulse with my heart.
Back of my neck the bottom half is gravel I can break up pretty easy but I think 3 more come back in their place.
Base of skull I have golf balls burried deep,. They dont throb but when I rub them it is painful but in the best way because I feel such release everywhere else but then they hurt for days. When I rub them to hard and deep oh man sore for days.
All this ends at my upper back and this area is awful. It burns on the surface level 24/7. Icy hot tricks my brain for about and hour. I did some scraping massage here and it sounded like rice krispies and I think hese are adhesions vs knots. .Deeper is full of thick knots, I have the trigger point hook to dig in there and sometimes magic happens and the ache everywhere else gets better for a bit.
The floating bone
It was mild discomfort, odd feelings of tightness inside my actual throat, tingles and a dry feel. It started wiggling around on its own pretty often and when I felt that first water balloon pop inside yikes I was scared AF. Now it just moves whenever it wants. I barely touch it and it "shoots" to the other side. Massaging in here hurts so GOOD! Looking all the way up and feeling from chin towards throat I have many bumps all different sizes. And lastly when I move my head certain ways it feels as if there is a leak happening and almost mucus-y like I could cough but usually dont need to
If you are still with me many apologies this got longer than I thought it would. Today has been my worst day so far, all the pains I mentioned are now hitting at once. Today I was sitting here sobbing in pain it because I was at 13 / 10 and wouldn't ease no matter what I pressed on . 3 Naproxen with 3 ibuprofen gives me about 3 hours of refief right now. I know posture is a part of my pain levels and ive aready ordered some tools so I can correct.
submitted by meowzzz4352 to TMJ [link] [comments]
10 months ago I had my last 2 upper molars pulled the "ol fashioned" way with the wiggling and the tugging and the ripping and the "Okay now you're going to feel a bit of pressure" followed by the feeling that your jaw is in fact being ripped out of your mouth.
Things started mild 6 months ago intensified around the 3 month mark and now these last 3 weeks I can barely function. I feel the definition of "Malaise" hits perfect. I'm afraid to leave my house the head pain / brain fog has me feeling like I could blackout any second, And the whoosh / vertigo / world spins has me terrified of driving.
So here is what I'm feeling in order of how they hit , everything is on the left side if that matters
Shoulder Blade - Everything is felt along the bottom of the blade.
Jolt of fire and burning on the skin -- A tearing and ripping under the skin on the muscle - Starts to vibrate a tingling fire sensation outward in a semi circle
When I put my tens unit on there the flexing caused pain on the top of shoulder and collarbone.
Always strongest when I lift or carry, random bursts when I'm sitting doing nothing and now even the weight of my phone sends it to 11
Muscles Weakness and Tremors
When the blade pain is bad, I can barely grip anything with my hand, Hands tremble and different arm muscles randomly will twitch and flex.
My jaw is now (2 weeks) shivering / chittering (IDK wtf it is) as if im cold. Digging my fingers into the facial knots will stop it. Always hits when I first get out of bed, then a few times during the day no pattern in the trigger
Eyes/Ears
Couldn't keep my contacts in more than half day , left only felt cloudy hazy blurry - They are brand new lenses and Ive been use the good "eye juice" with no changes. Tried yesterday had to take em out within an hour.
Sharp twinge zap inside the ear - cold trickling sensation down the canal - ends with a punch of pain behind ear on the thick neck tendon
The Whoosh (Is this brain fog? Something else?) Zap / Jolt of electricity on top of my brain but under my skull - The whoosh when i see everything spin a 360 for a second - And ends with me "off kilter' for minutes to hours, As if there is a delay between what my eye sees to when my brain processes. During the spell ill feel "wonky" "Out of body" "tunnelly vision"
The Exploding Head
Its a constant feeling / sensation that my head is filling with sludge.
Forehead & eye have waves of intense dull aches, This part is killing so bad right now, even with NSAIDS it never stops having pressure just relieves it slightly. When it kicks hard and throbs my eyes go really fuzzy and that im going to blackout feeling hits. I have not actually passed or blacked out thank god - my cats would eat me alive in a day -
Jaw/ cheek & gums are twitchy with tightness/fullness and pointy pain shockwaves. The M in the TMJ is a ball of rubberbands and it is so very tender. My face does not appear to have anything swelling outwards from here but poking around in there i find tons of lumps I can break up.. Opening and closing i have full range I think and right now no popping or pains when i do. The area by my ear where the bones connect is so tender, but I dont feel lumps much here. I feel such relief when I hit here with my point tool.
Side of my Neck has small mushy lumps just under the skin and some big daddies deeper in and these ones get stabbyy pains that pulse with my heart.
Back of my neck the bottom half is gravel I can break up pretty easy but I think 3 more come back in their place.
Base of skull I have golf balls burried deep,. They dont throb but when I rub them it is painful but in the best way because I feel such release everywhere else but then they hurt for days. When I rub them to hard and deep oh man sore for days.
All this ends at my upper back and this area is awful. It burns on the surface level 24/7. Icy hot tricks my brain for about and hour. I did some scraping massage here and it sounded like rice krispies and I think hese are adhesions vs knots. .Deeper is full of thick knots, I have the trigger point hook to dig in there and sometimes magic happens and the ache everywhere else gets better for a bit.
The floating bone
It was mild discomfort, odd feelings of tightness inside my actual throat, tingles and a dry feel. It started wiggling around on its own pretty often and when I felt that first water balloon pop inside yikes I was scared AF. Now it just moves whenever it wants. I barely touch it and it "shoots" to the other side. Massaging in here hurts so GOOD! Looking all the way up and feeling from chin towards throat I have many bumps all different sizes. And lastly when I move my head certain ways it feels as if there is a leak happening and almost mucus-y like I could cough but usually dont need to
If you are still with me many apologies this got longer than I thought it would. Today has been my worst day so far, all the pains I mentioned are now hitting at once. Today I was sitting here sobbing in pain it because I was at 13 / 10 and wouldn't ease no matter what I pressed on . 3 Naproxen with 3 ibuprofen gives me about 3 hours of refief right now. I know posture is a part of my pain levels and ive aready ordered some tools so I can correct.
2024.05.19 07:20 Significant-Tower146 Best Canvas Shotgun Case
 | submitted by Significant-Tower146 to u/Significant-Tower146 [link] [comments] https://preview.redd.it/jxm639u9ib1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=528357b3be4d67d6368a58e90a28b1ab58d56047 If you're an avid shotgun enthusiast, you understand the importance of keeping your gun safe and secure. In this article, we'll be reviewing the Canvas Shotgun Case, a sleek and practical solution to all your shotgun storage needs. From its high-quality materials to its sturdy design, we'll explore what sets this case apart from the competition. So, whether you're a weekend warrior or a serious collector, get ready to discover the perfect fit for your shotgun. The Top 15 Best Canvas Shotgun Case
Reviews🔗Tough Vault Takedown Rifle & Shotgun Case by Pelicanhttps://preview.redd.it/tstjbbv9ib1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b6d6ef383f038e45cc16a08f7d15c94b6b417b70 I recently discovered the Pelican V700 Vault Takedown Rifle and Shotgun Case, and it's truly a game changer for transportation of your beloved firearms. As an avid hunter, I appreciate that this case provides a high level of security, offering crushproof, dustproof, and weather resistant protection. The sturdy handles ensure your rifles or shotguns can withstand even the toughest conditions on your hunting trips. One feature I particularly love is the presence of six push button latches that offer secure closure with easy-open access. This ensures your weapons are safe and secure while also making it convenient for you to access them when needed. The case also comes with specific foam designed to fit takedown firearms and related accessories, providing your gear with excellent protection during transportation. However, like any product, there are some cons as well. The case is quite bulky and heavy, making it less ideal for those looking for a lightweight solution. Additionally, cutting and shaping the foam to fit your specific equipment can be time-consuming. Overall, despite its drawbacks, I would highly recommend this gun case to anyone in need of a reliable and resilient transportation solution for their takedown firearms. 🔗Evolution Outdoor Waxed Canvas Rifle Case for 1 Scoped Rifle with Zippered Pockethttps://preview.redd.it/9u134c8aib1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a224fd4ba1667cfbf97b4de44e1e8f833e8a5f4d I recently got an opportunity to use the Evolution Outdoor Rawhide Rifle Case for my shooting practice. I was really impressed with the choice of materials and craftsmanship involved in creating this piece. The waxed canvas outer shell is not just stylish but also robust enough to stand up to regular usage without showing signs of wear. One feature that caught my eye was the interior flannel lining, which not only provides a classic touch to the overall design but also offers excellent protection for my firearm. The heavy gauge foam padding and 24 oz. cotton duck canvas provide an extra layer of security and handling ease. Despite these high points, it did come with some minor drawbacks. The full-length, antique-brass zippers are reliable, but they may require some extra care during closing to prevent them from jamming. The front storage pocket could be slightly more spacious to accommodate more gear. Overall, I find the Evolution Outdoor Rawhide Rifle Case to be an excellent choice. Its classic design appeals to the vintage lover in me, while its superior build quality ensures my rifle is safe and secure, ready for action at any time. 🔗Drake Waterfowl Side-Opening Gun Casehttps://preview.redd.it/7qc6vqraib1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5f017e58bfe2ec96fd189fd8789c9c2f197f619b Experience the innovation of the Drake Waterfowl Side-Opening Gun Case! This ground-breaking design revolutionizes how we store and maintain our firearms. The patented side flap allows for seamless access to your gun, while its HD2 material and water-resistant nylon interior liner provide top-notch protection. The adjustable shoulder strap, outer pocket for choke tubes, and sturdy snap fastenings make it the perfect companion for keeping your firearms safe, dry, and ready for action. I've been using this case for some time now and I can't sing its praises enough. The side-flap feature is a game-changer; it made it incredibly easy to clean and dry my shotgun after a hunting trip. The interior is made of synthetic materials that don't absorb water or dirt, which is a lifesaver when your gear gets splashed with mud and water. A small drawback I've noticed is that the exterior pocket can be a bit challenging to close if you're storing choke tubes. However, I suppose this is a minor concern given the case's overall performance and quality. The durability has been impressive; I've taken this case out in all conditions and it's held up beautifully. In summary, the Drake Waterfowl Side-Opening Gun Case is a brilliant and practical solution for storing and maintaining your firearms. Its innovative design, durable construction, and water resistance make it a must-have for hunters and shooting enthusiasts alike. Despite the minor issue with the exterior pocket, I wholeheartedly recommend this case for its performance and value. 🔗Avery Floating Gun Case for Waterfowl Huntinghttps://preview.redd.it/8lw2grzaib1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=bbd30c93a769a22e1ea2e8f76f335f713afa1566 As an avid waterfowl hunter, I can safely say that the Avery Floating 2.0 Gun Case in Max5 camo has completely changed my game. I remember one chilly morning when my shotgun took an unexpected dip in the water. Thanks to the water-resistant DuraMax material of this case, I didn't have to worry about my trusty companion being ruined by the moisture. What I especially love about this case is how it ensures protection in water with its floating design. It's like having a personal bodyguard for my precious shotgun! And let's not forget the adjustable shoulder strap which makes carrying this beast of a case incredibly comfortable. However, there are two downsides to this otherwise fantastic gun case. Firstly, it tends to run on the smaller side, causing some issues when it comes to fitting in larger shotguns with extended chokes. Secondly, even though the material is strong and reliable, it does lack a little in terms of water resistance. Overall, if you're looking for a solid and reliable gun case that will protect your shotgun from unexpected mishaps while you're out hunting, then the Avery Floating 2.0 Gun Case in Max5 camo is definitely worth considering. Just remember to check its compatibility with your specific shotgun first! 🔗Stylish Modern Sleeper Chair with Pillow and Pockethttps://preview.redd.it/4x1nubgbib1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=37810e6949e6249e2f660e8c7d0683aa56e47440 I recently took the Allen Ranch Canvas 52 Shotgun Case out on a hunting trip, and I must say, it surpassed my expectations. The exterior zippered pocket provides quick access to essentials like ammunition and other accessories, while the plush padded interior ensures my dear shotgun is safe from dings and scratches. The weight of 363 grams felt comfortably light in my hands, thanks to its padded handles. Despite its compact size, there was ample storage space for both my shotgun and all its necessary gear. I particularly appreciated the attention to detail in the design - it's clear that this case was crafted with serious shooters in mind. However, one minor inconvenience was that the case was a bit too tight for some of my larger hunting knives. Though this was not a deal-breaker by any means, it did require a little extra effort to fit everything in securely. Overall, the Allen Ranch Canvas 52 Shotgun Case has proven to be an invaluable addition to my hunting gear. Its superior craftsmanship, plentiful storage, and comfortable handling make it worthy of the highest praise. 🔗Durable Cotton Duck Canvas Rifle Case with Abrasion Resistancehttps://preview.redd.it/auqqjjrbib1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8360348697ba39d6be97246e3af994eb941a64b3 I've been using the Allen Ranch Canvas Rifle Case for a few months now and it's been an absolute game-changer. Not only does it securely hold my hunting rifle, but the plush quilted interior provides extra protection. The cotton duck exterior fabric with abrasion resistant synthetic base is a real bonus too, especially when I'm hunting in rough terrain. It's also got a big exterior zippered pocket where I stash extra ammo, hearing protection, or whatever else I need on my hunting trips. Plus, the lockable zippers and metal D-ring ensure that my rifle stays safe and secure when not in use. Another great feature is the padded carrying handles, which make it easy and comfortable to carry. The only downside? The exterior fabric might attract more dirt and dust than other materials. But that's a small price to pay for such an otherwise fantastic rifle case. " In this review, I highlighted the safe and secure nature of the rifle case, the abundant storage, the plush quilted interior for added protection, and the convenient padded carrying handles. However, I also mentioned a minor downside to the cotton duck exterior fabric's tendency to attract more dirt and dust than other materials. Overall, I would recommend this rifle case to fellow hunters looking for a durable and protective option. 🔗Durable Waterfowl Floater Shotgun Casehttps://preview.redd.it/hkf7qeacib1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5cc2c5eceed671684770c2ac21727ea77cb63c30 The Browning Trapper Creek Shooting Vest is an exceptional product that provides optimal comfort and convenience for avid hunters and shooting enthusiasts. This lightweight, open-mesh vest is perfect for hot summer days, offering the perfect blend of protection, breathability, and easy access. The superior design boasts a divided pocket on each side, allowing you the flexibility of carrying shells of different sizes or using the second section for either spent shells or alternative shot sizes. One of the highlights of this vest is its compatibility with both shotguns and rifles, ensuring a wide range of applicability. The high-quality leather shoulder patch is another noteworthy feature, providing excellent protection and stability for your shooting arm. This helps to keep the gun securely mounted in position, enabling you to maintain a consistent shooting form and improve your accuracy. Furthermore, the adjustable fit ensures that you can find the perfect balance between comfort and functionality, making this vest an ideal choice for individuals of different body types. In addition to its exceptional design and user-friendly features, the Browning Trapper Creek Shooting Vest also boasts a durable construction, ensuring that it can withstand the rigors of regular use and provide long-lasting performance. The high-quality materials and impeccable craftsmanship are evident in every stitch, and you can always trust that you're getting a top-notch product when you choose this vest. The affordable price point is yet another reason to consider this versatile and practical shooting vest. For a modest investment, you can enjoy the benefits of a high-quality, well-designed vest that is perfect for both beginners and experienced shooters alike. In conclusion, the Browning Trapper Creek Shooting Vest is a must-have for anyone who is passionate about shooting sports and wants to enhance their performance and overall experience. 🔗Browning Waterfowl Floating Shotgun Case for 54" Shotgunhttps://preview.redd.it/mitmsqjcib1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d03de5a610ab0f4ac67b987f368793c107dab6a7 I've had the pleasure of using the Browning Waterfowl Floater 54-inch Shotgun Case Major Brown 1419509852 over the past year and it's been a game-changer. The heavy-duty design gives me peace of mind knowing my shotgun is well protected. As someone who often finds themselves on a boat hunting for ducks, the ability to trust this case to keep my gun safe from water damage is truly comforting. One of the features that really stands out to me is the high-density closed cell foam padding. It ensures that my shotgun stays dry even if it does happen to fall into the water. The other day I accidentally dropped my case from my boat, and while my heart dropped along with it, I was relieved to see my beloved shotgun bobbing on the surface safely. Another detail I appreciate about this case is the excellent quality of workmanship. The fabric is rugged and durable, able to withstand years of use without showing signs of wear. The web handles and hanging loop make it easy to carry and store when not in use. However, there are some minor drawbacks. The detachable shoulder strap could use improvement; it tends to loosen over time and doesn't stay put as securely as I would like. Additionally, while the Browning Vintage Tan camo pattern is attractive, it might not be to everyone's taste. In conclusion, I highly recommend the Browning Waterfowl Floater 54-inch Shotgun Case Major Brown 1419509852. Its exceptional protection against water damage, high-quality construction, and stylish appearance make it an excellent choice for any serious waterfowl hunter. Despite its minor cons, this case has become an indispensable part of my hunting gear! 🔗Premium Shotgun Case for Ultimate Protection and Conveniencehttps://preview.redd.it/4ai1513dib1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3caf9ec45e3a27c07a7941285ed553bd7b744ede As a gun enthusiast who constantly needs to transport my treasured shotgun, Uncle Mike's Padded Long Gun Case has been a reliable companion. The Forest Green color lends an understated elegance to its sturdy exterior. I've found that the balanced, wraparound nylon handles add a measure of comfort while carrying the case. However, it was the model's thickness that was the real standout feature. With thick padding and resilient construction, this case ensures my firearm remains secure during transportation. This superior protection is worth the small weight increase. The full-length zippers do a fantastic job of allowing the cases to open flat, making it easier to access the shotgun inside. Nevertheless, the model does have a couple of minor drawbacks. It's not the most spacious case available, leading to some snug fits for larger firearms. And despite its snag-resistant lining, the case can sometimes catch on door frames or hooks in storage, which could be a concern for those not willing to be extra cautious. Overall, Uncle Mike's Padded Long Gun Case is a product that caters to the specific needs of a gun enthusiast, striking a balance between style and practicality. It has become an essential element in my firearm arsenal, providing a level of security and protection that I can trust. 🔗Durable Floating Gun Carry Bag with Adjustable Shoulder Straphttps://preview.redd.it/qu1xi2edib1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=fee2a679c296f99f01bdf48cffabeae463ec3862 I had the pleasure of trying out the Rig 'Em Right Sure Shot Floating Gun Case, and I must say, it's a game-changer. The dense floatation feature was fantastic; it helped keep my gun safe and dry, even in the roughest waters. The full-length zipper was incredibly convenient, allowing me to easily access my gun when needed. The oversized zipper pulls were a nice touch as well, making it easy to open and close the case with one hand. The soft lining within the case was a nice surprise, providing extra protection for my firearm. The adjustable shoulder strap made it comfortable to carry, and the double-reinforced tip was a reliable addition that helped ensure the case would last for years. One downside I found was the storage pocket wasn't as large as I had hoped, but it still held some essentials nicely. Another minor inconvenience was that the case wasn't quite as camouflaged as I had hoped, so it might not be ideal for stealthy hunts. However, overall, I was impressed with the Rig 'Em Right Sure Shot Floating Gun Case and would highly recommend it to any gun enthusiast. 🔗Ultra-Dense Shotgun Case for Ultimate Protectionhttps://preview.redd.it/zansyfvdib1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=264599e1bcad2be7c14ea7551c28379f8b5604e5 I've had the pleasure of trying Allen Company's Leadville 52" Shotgun Case in real life situations. It's not just a shotgun case; it's the perfect companion for all my shooting expeditions. The 52-inch size caters to almost all types of shotguns, and the ultra-dense, dual foam padding system makes it almost impossible to damage the precious shotgun. The Endura fabric covering is a real game-changer. It not only looks good but its easy-to-clean feature is a lifesaver. Another plus point is the lockable zippers. They offer a sense of security that is hard to ignore. The reinforced webbed carrying handles make carrying the case a breeze. However, there is one con that stood out to me quite prominently - the size is quite bulky. It can be a hassle to carry around in crowded places. Nevertheless, considering the amount of protection it provides and the convenience it offers, it's certainly worth a try. 🔗Ultra-Compact Beretta Victory Shotgun Breakdown Casehttps://preview.redd.it/5j8qv18eib1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7615bbdcb98211c16bc56760b8ecb9d7bd6a96a7 I recently got my hands on the Beretta Victory Shotgun Case, and let me tell you, it's a game-changer. Being the avid hunter that I am, I always dread the moment when I have to stow away my shotgun after a long day in the field. But this case? It's a piece of cake to use. The first thing I noticed was how the case has separate compartments for the stock and receiver. It's perfect for protecting your shotgun, whether you're carrying an oveunder or a side-by-side. And, it's quite the sight! The padded interior with velvet lining is like a gentle cradle for your precious gun. The thermoformed ABS plastic exterior is sturdy and secure, making sure my shotgun withstands any bump, drop, or scratch. It’s a pleasure to note, handling this case is a breeze. The durable handles make it super easy to carry to and from the range. Plus, when you open it, it lays flat on the ground, offering easy access. I also appreciate the convenience of the three separate combination locks. They add an extra layer of security, especially when I'm traveling with my shotgun. Now, no one said that hunting in the wilderness was all sunshine and roses. But this Beretta Victory Shotgun Case sure makes rough adventures a breeze. With its ultra-compact design, compatibility with shotguns up to 30 inches long, and TSA-approved status, it's a perfect companion for any hunter, no matter the terrain. As someone who's tried and tested this case, I genuinely think it's worth every penny. It's an essential accessory for any hunter looking to store their shotgun securely and with the least hassle possible. Try it out once, and I promise you, you'll never want to go back. 🔗Lakewood Padded Canvas Shotgun Case with Lockable Designhttps://preview.redd.it/g0bbaloeib1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=00ca6c89af2ecb5704339bd8b437f6d688d7dbaa Imagine treating your precious firearm with the care it deserves - that's what the Allen 52 Heritage Lakewood Shotgun Case brings to the table. This canvas shotgun case not only boasts a vintage-inspired appearance but also boasts modern functionality. Locking up your shotgun has never been easier thanks to the lockable design of the case. The convenience of carrying it around without any hiccups is made possible with the inclusion of a handy carry handle. The padding, a crucial feature for any case, is thick and robust in this product. This provides robust protection for your gun by keeping it snug and secure. If there was one minor downside, it could be the size of the case that might not be compact enough for certain situations. Overall, the Allen 52 Heritage Lakewood Shotgun Case is a reliable and stylish shotgun case that offers excellent protection to your firearm. Despite its minor drawback, its pros outweigh the cons, making it a perfect fit for those seeking a practical and stylish solution for their shotgun storage needs. 🔗Dense Foam Padded 52" Dual Color Shotgun Casehttps://preview.redd.it/ns5008weib1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6422b25ab42b2fb422521add3a92ac2369822376 As a hunter and gun enthusiast, I recently had the chance to try out the Allen 52 Powell Shotgun Case in black and green. It's been a handy addition to my gear collection, providing both protection and convenience. The shotgun fits snugly inside the dual-colored case, which is lined with dense foam padding to absorb any impact. The 600D polyester exterior is both durable and water-resistant, ensuring my shotgun stays safe and dry. One standout feature is the large exterior pocket, perfect for storing extra ammo, cleaning supplies, or any other essential gear. The 1.5-inch webbed strap also makes it easy to tote the case around, whether I'm hiking through the woods or traveling to a shooting range. Overall, the Allen 52 Powell Shotgun Case has been a reliable companion for any hunter in need of a convenient and protective case for their shotgun. 🔗High-Quality Canvas Shotgun Case for Outdoor Tactical Gearhttps://preview.redd.it/t7yi33ifib1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=553aaa73315e367976742d99d2f6d019d1c2d525 As a reviewer who's tried the Evolution Outdoor Design EVODS Mesquite Shotgun case, let me share my experience. The case has a generous length of 50 inches, which easily accommodates my long-barreled shotgun. The quality of the canvas is top-notch, providing a sense of durability. However, one drawback I faced was its narrow width and depth, making it challenging to fit in one of my ten different shotguns. Despite this hiccup, I was impressed by the case's protective features and its reasonable price. Overall, it proved to be a useful accessory in my outdoor arsenal. Buyer's GuideCanvas shotgun cases have become the go-to choice for gun enthusiasts and sportspersons due to their durability, versatility, and stylish appearance. These cases come in various sizes, designs, and features to accommodate different shotgun types, providing ample protection for your precious firearms. In this section, we will discuss the essential factors to consider when purchasing a canvas shotgun case, as well as some general advice to help you make the best choice.Size and Shapehttps://preview.redd.it/0ok5kpqfib1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=228dd0c3aff0591c87def7325ee047be57a2ed44 The first factor to consider is the size and shape of your shotgun. Most canvas cases are designed to fit different types, sizes, and barrel lengths, but it's always a good idea to compare the interior dimensions of the case with your firearm's dimensions. This will ensure a comfortable and secure fit. Construction and MaterialHigh-quality canvas cases are constructed with heavy-duty materials, such as 18-ounce cotton canvas, and reinforced stitching for enhanced durability. Additionally, look for cases with a PVC coating to provide extra water resistance and UV protection, ensuring the case remains in good condition even when exposed to the elements.Locking SystemA reliable locking mechanism is crucial for keeping your shotgun safe from theft or accidental discharge. Look for cases with sturdy locks, latches, or combination locks, preferably one that can be easily secured when you're not using the case. Some high-end options may also have a built-in combination lock, ensuring your firearm stays secure during transportation. https://preview.redd.it/3qlll15gib1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4cb7bd2b312403557d560450b2336e07437b970b Design and AestheticsCanvas shotgun cases come in various design options, from classic brown to stylish camouflage patterns. Consider your personal preferences and how the case will be used when choosing the design. A well-designed case not only adds a touch of style but also helps you easily identify your firearm in a crowd or storage area.Maintenance and CareCanvas shotgun cases require minimal maintenance, but it's essential to clean and maintain them properly to ensure their longevity. Always check for wear and tear, especially in high-stress areas like zippers and seams. If needed, repair or replace these components before they compromise the overall durability of the case. Additionally, store your case in a cool, dry place when not in use to prevent mold and mildew growth.Pricing and Valuehttps://preview.redd.it/y1rk1ahgib1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=21ff08cc6a124af25ddbb1904067965f6e55998c Canvas shotgun cases come in a range of price points, from budget-friendly options to high-end, premium cases. While it's tempting to go for the cheapest option, remember that you typically get what you pay for in terms of quality, materials, and features. Invest in a high-quality canvas case that meets your specific needs and budget to ensure long-lasting protection for your prized shotgun. FAQWhat is a Canvas Shotgun Case?A Canvas Shotgun Case is a protective covering designed to store and transport shotguns. It is typically made of durable canvas material and features padded interior to ensure the safe and secure transportation of the firearm. https://preview.redd.it/qvavqyygib1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f8e2a0581af23c9fcab91f66152ad9ba5ba05cc0 What are the benefits of using a Canvas Shotgun Case?
What are the different sizes available for Canvas Shotgun Cases?Canvas Shotgun Cases come in various sizes to accommodate different shotgun lengths. Be sure to measure your shotgun before purchasing to ensure a proper fit.How do I clean my Canvas Shotgun Case?To clean your Canvas Shotgun Case, use a damp cloth and a mild detergent. Avoid using harsh chemicals, as they can damage the material. After cleaning, let the case air dry completely before storing.Are Canvas Shotgun Cases waterproof?Canvas Shotgun Cases are typically not waterproof, but they are weather-resistant. We recommend using them in dry conditions to ensure the longevity of the case.Can I leave my shotgun in the Canvas Shotgun Case for extended periods of time?While Canvas Shotgun Cases are designed to protect your firearm during transportation, they should not be used for long-term storage. The gun should be cleaned and stored in a dry environment, preferably in a gun safe or a secure locker.Can I customize my Canvas Shotgun Case?Some Canvas Shotgun Case manufacturers offer customization options, such as embroidery or color choices. Be sure to check with your preferred manufacturer for availability.As an Amazon™ Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases. |
2024.05.19 04:21 blissbitch05 Solid yard sale finds today!
 | Had a great yard sale haul today! Biggest score was a box of sealed miniature furniture kits , got the whole box for 30$ submitted by blissbitch05 to ThriftStoreHauls [link] [comments] |
2024.05.19 04:12 pizzapillowfort FMH Master Doc
The moment a lot of you have been waiting for is here!
A couple of notes before you read (or after because I would just jump into the list right away too)
Mentioned on Tiktok and on the pod once
Myspace Boyfriend
Mentioned on Tiktok
Third Boyfriend
Met on eCrush.com in 2002 and this was mentioned on the Cracked Up podcast, The Dave Glaser Podcast and Tiktok
The Kiwi
Met on a 2 week Model UN type youth trip in high school when Ali was 15, never a boyfriend but she had a huge crush on him, he tried to kiss Ali and she literally ran away, didn’t talk the rest of the trip but exchanged numbers and screen names (Ali’s was FineGal13 or BeachJewel760), she made him a mixtape cd called “Ali’s really cool mix for The Kiwi” but never sent it and she still has it. In 2021, he DM’d her when she posted photos of her and her mom in France and invites her to visit him in London, she says she can’t but says they should catch up if he comes to NYC
Fourth Boyfriend
Met on OkCupid when you had to use it on the computer, this was mentioned on Tiktok
The Homecoming Date or Light Switch
First boyfriend? (she goes back and forth calling him her first bf or a situationship), a family friend, a month younger than Ali, dated in high school but went to different high schools, football player, made him ask her to her Homecoming dance over email (her words), Ali hid in the bathroom the whole Homecoming dance, 3-4 revisits of this situations as adults, saw him on Bumble a few years ago and texted him that he had a typo in his bio, “he very much wanted to be with me” and now he’s married with a kid. His mom is still “obsessed” with Ali and she listens to FMH
Random college guy
Freshman year of college, Ali doesn’t have a nickname for him/doesn’t remember his real name, met this guy through a friend, was texting him to invite him over to hot tub but her phone autocorrected to “how about some hot rubbing tonight?” but Ali didn’t noticed/didn’t correct it and he never replied, Ali had a house party and got really drunk and was all over him, he left the party early, she messaged him on MySpace 3-4 times asking why he left
The Resident
Matched on Match.com, first guy she dated in NYC after college, older than Ali, a doctor, lasted 3 months ”maybe”, he didn’t like Ali’s friends, got a card from him on her birthday and it said “Love, The Resident” and it took Ali back a little, Ali drinks black coffee because of him, he coordinated having her mom visit NYC for her birthday then he broke up with her a week later
The Ghost
Met at a bar when she was 25, turns out they matched on OkCupid and they already had a date scheduled next week, they dated for 6-8 weeks, had sleepovers, “The worst ghosting experience I’ve ever had”, he borrowed The Great Gatsby from Ali’s roommate, planned to make dinner together after a beach trip in August with her friends and never showed up, Ali is blowing up his phone and gets no reply, two weeks later she finally texts “are you alive? check yes or no” and he responds “Yes”, Ali then ask if he could return the book and gets no reply again, 5 months go by and she receives the book in the mail with the note: “Here’s the book back. Sorry. P.S. sorry about last summer. I was in a bad place. You’re a great person and your salmon is amazing”, since then she has ran into him twice on the streets and matched with him on Bumble
The Coach/Mr. Adorable
First serious boyfriend at 26/27 in 2013, matched on Match.com or met through work depending if you’re listening to the pod or reading her OG blog, clean-cut look, played volleyball, Ali invited him to a friend’s birthday party and they made out in the streets at 4am, on their second date he asked Ali if she was seeing any one and when Ali said no he ask her to be his girlfriend 3 days after their first date, dated for almost 1.5 years or almost 2 years depending on if you’re listening to the pod or the Patreon, first time saying “I love you” to a guy, “lovely guy“, never would posted Ali on his instagram until Ali said something, he “lived” with her for two weeks while he was in between apartments, tried blind folding/hair pulling during sex and she didn’t like it, by the end of their relationship Ali didn’t like sex and thought she wasn’t a very sexual person, after they broke up Ali drunk texted him at 2am and he picked her up and she spent the night and she took her things in the morning in a rolly suitcase, from her blog in 2015: “I just want to be careful I don’t end up with another Mr. Adorable situation, where I find myself dating my platonic best friend”, had drinks with him in 2016 from the blog: “Not in a romantic way (at least on my end)”, Ali still talks to him sometimes through casual instagram DMs, he’s currently (as of 2021) dating someone for 4+ years and Ali thinks they’re going to get engaged
Trouble
OG 2015 FMH blog, never mentioned on the pod, “I was immediately enamored with him”, met at a Beer Olympic party but he worked with one of Ali’s best friends (Ali was still dating The Coach at the time), lived in BK, tattoos and stubble, Ali’s best friend said he was a “fuck boy”, “he very much made me see that it was the right thing for me and The Coach to not be together”, from her blog in 2015: “he has this look in his eye like he’s constantly laughing at me – in a super sexy way”, he texted her saying he didn’t see anything romantically with her and she sent a gif of someone shrugging
Personal side note: Ali has mentioned she has cheated on someone but never disclosed who she cheated on or with. I feel like she cheated on Mr.A/The Coach with Trouble because of the timeline. Just a guess.
Waffles
Matched on Bumble, OG 2015 FMH blog, he asked Ali fuck/marry/kill breakfast foods, dated 2 months around summer time, on Fourth of July while watching fireworks he said how they had a great day and Ali replied with something along the lines with “yeah, it would be better if I could call you my boyfriend”, he said he wanted a relationship but just not with Ali and shortly afterwards they stopped seeing each other
The Buffalo
Lived in Buffalo NY, 6’5, Scorpio, met in 2015 at Adults National volleyball (Ali’s team won that year) where he was heckling her while she was playing, asks Ali’s mom for her number and Ali’s mom said “I guess you’re tall enough” and told him to ask her himself, he flew her out and she met his parents, dated over summer, exclusive but never boyfriend/girlfriend (but called him her LD boyfriend on TikTok), texted and talked on the phone a lot, Ali’s best friend’s favorite ex “they had really good banter”, in October he invited her to his cousins wedding and she invited him to her friends wedding, after Ali bought her ticket to his cousins wedding (with the promise he would buy her ticket to her friend’s wedding) he ghosted and stonewalled her, she “poured her heart out to him on voicemail” and he never replied, she asked him to pay her back for her ticket and he got mad that she “made this about money”, 2 years later he told Ali that he freaked out because he really liked her and saw a future with her but knew she would never move to Buffalo and it would “never work”, Ali said at the time she would have considered moving for him, Ali used to have him blocked on Facebook and told all her friends not to update her on info about him (unless she asked). He’s now married and goes to Disney with his wife (which Ali kind of scoffs at?), Ali said on TikTok that she dodged a bullet
Baby Bic
Met him at Adults National years ago, had a flirtationship with him in 2016 when he was 19 years old, ran into him at the Adults Nationals 2021, last texts she got from him were about getting his fake ID taken away at the bar and him visiting her in NYC but Ali didn’t want to buy him beer and drink at her apartment
The Chef
Matched on Tinder around 2016, he loved karaoke, “total shit”, asked Ali to be his girlfriend and to meet his mom after a month, off and on dating, broke up the first time because he was talking to his ex, lied and flew to Mexico to see his ex while dating Ali, that ex sent Ali a Snapchat of them in bed together on that Mexico trip, Ali broke up with him via text and called him a shitty boyfriend, he’s the reason Ali deleted her Snapchat because of drunk Snaps he would send post break up, FB messaged Ali 6 years later (while Roark was visiting/staying with Ali) and said sorry for being a shit head. Ali’s best friends hated him
The Dentist
Met on Halloween in the wild, Canadian, dated NYE 2016- May 2017 “nice guy, not my guy”, one of Ali’s best friend’s favorite ex “he adored you, “he was too sweet for me” and “he had no edge to him”, he painted Ali’s cat for her 30th birthday but she was annoyed it was just Rory and not both cats, The Chef texted Ali while on a date/sleeping at his house
ASV - Aspiring Sober Vegan
Met through a friend (her best guy friend’s college roommate) the day before she had to fly out to her dad’s memorial, a doctor, into meditation, remembered him “being cuter” when they went on a first date, felt “the spark”, had “omg this is awesome sex”, Ali described this relationship as a “slow burn” and “the most attracted she ever been to a partner” even thought she didn’t think he was that cute in the beginning, dated 2-3 months before he tried to ghost Ali but they talked and broke up, four months later they start casually dating/FWB because he’s moving but this turns into a ‘middle distance relationship’ and he moves to Philly, had a lot of communication issues but didn't have a lot of fights, wants to live in Ohio and give a % of his income to charity, Ali was close to saying ‘I love you’ but didn’t, he uninvited her to meet his extended family and they got in a fight, broke up with her a couple weeks before their 6 month anniversary at the park while on a picnic and told her that she’s still his favorite person, Ali used to think he was “the one that got away” and would frequently have dreams about him. From what Ali knows, he's sober but not vegan
The Scientist
2017 or 2018ish, from San Diego, went on one date, Ali ended up ghosting him due to the decline in her dad’s health, saw him on Hinge while she was in San Diego for 3 months in 2020, texted him and apologized for ghosting him, ended up going on 2-3 more dates, took a selfie in front of his house and sent it to him but acted like she didn’t know that was his house and made a TikTok about it, things ended up not working but she doesn’t make it clear on who ended it. She can now see she shouldn’t have been going on dates during this time when her dad was sick.
Good on Paper Divorced Dude
Met a couple of years ago (she told this story on TikTok in 2020) on Bumble
The Groomsman
Met at her friend Ashley’s wedding in Chicago Oct 2019, had a “two night stand” with him, texted/talked/FT’d for 3-4 months, divorced, never dated seriously/FWB, saw each other a couple time when he came to NYC, Ali stopped talking with him due to FMH and her trying to find a serious relationship, he starts dating someone, follows FMH on insta, slid into her DM in 2022 and then sent her soup while she was sick, turns out he’s single again, 2 months later Ali is heading to Chicago and texts him “Hello! Reminder that my arrival to your neck of the woods is imminent” and turns out he is now seeing someone and Ali doesn’t see him while in Chicago (at least she doesn’t mention it)
Unnicknamed person
He was her plus one at her best friend from college’s NYE wedding 2019/2020, met and hung out with Ali’s mom, posted photos of them together on her personal Insta story, “fully dating but weren’t official hehe” doesn’t have a nickname/never gave him a nickname? This could be The Latvian/the person she texted her friend in DC about saying “I think I’m on a date with my husband”
He was browsing Bumble while Ali was in the bathroom during their first date, he was banned from Bumble and was using his grandma phone number. Ali turned down a second date
The Duke
Early FMH, went for long periods of time in between texts, 7-8 Zoom dates while Ali was in San Diego and he was in NY, Ali said you could see three of his ex’s on his instagram page (without scrolling), they finally went on one date and it was “meh” but they did kiss on their date
The Oyster
Matched on Bumble (he had one photo and no bio) two weeks before Valentines Day, Gemini, a lawyer, part of the 13 First Dates in 30 Days series (he was #13), dated Feb 2020-Aug 2020, love bomber, felt “the spark” and became official after 3 dates, best first date ever??? at the time, said “I love you” to Ali after two weeks, “For most of my relationship with The Oyster, he didn’t live in the city he had moved to Connecticut without telling me”, would fight all the time, opposite political views, Ali felt like a “fucking summer camp director” because she planned all their dates and he would get upset if Ali didn't have a plan, sought out a therapist (Megan) because of her relationship struggles because of him, went to Mass/church, he wanted a traditional marriage/life/wife/kids (at one point had Ali thinking she wanted that), didn’t want to live in NYC, didn’t support BLM, Cindy hated him
The Pilot
Went on 3 dates, texted a lot, didn’t hear back from him in four days and when she said she was looking to date someone who showed more consistency, he replied saying he met someone the day after their last date who seems to have more free time than Ali and he wants to pursue that but would like to be friends, Ali said on TikTok that this other women “bent her schedule to his schedule” and she was unwilling to do that. Mostly talked about him on TikTok
The Analyst
Matched on Bumble two years ago and went on one date, re matched in 2021 and he stood Ali up, she send him a text “getting stood up” script and he never replied. Only mentioned him on TikTok (?)
First date on the pod? I couldn't find anything else about him
The Scuba Diver
The Music Man
One date, “he didn’t do anything wrong, he’s just not for me”, amped up small talk, complimented Ali a lot which made her feel awkward cause she wasn’t feeling it, he texted her and asked for a second date and Ali sent the no ghosting script
The Bet
Uses the phrase “ok bet”, 28 years old shoe designer, only went on one dinner date to a spot he picked, turns out its cash only and he didn’t bring cash, was not into him , not looking for the same thing
The Dinosaur
Nickname was previously The Hawaiian, first date at Dinosaur BBQ, stood in a parking spot to save for Ali, he asked for a kiss after their date and Ali declined saying maybe next time
The Rose
He sent her a rose on hinge, first date was an hour long walk in the park while drinking beer
The Comic
Matched on Hinge, older than Ali (Ali’s friends express how happy they were to hear that), had brunch on their first date (was the first part of a double header but the second guy canceled), listed as “moderate” politically on Hinge, good and easy convo, went back and forth twice over text and then never heard back from him, “technically not ghosting...”
The Camper
Met in the wild at a volleyball tournament in July, lives in Chicago, 27 years old, hung out the whole time, over heard Ali asking someone to get her a make out partner, gave Ali his number, drunkly ask him for a FT date in the future and he didn’t reply, Ali texts him again about a volleyball thing and he replied back with not a lot of enthusiasm, Ali is going to Chicago in Sept for a volleyball tournament and she’s already planning on playing 4-on-4 with her best friend vs. his roommate and maybe The Camper, he texts her saying he has to work on the date of the tournament and won’t be able to do the 4-on-4 game, “I feel like I got broken up with someone I never want to date in the first place”
Went on a dinner date, was chatting up the waitress in a kind of creepy way, was bragging about a lot of things and it turned Ali off and Ali texted him her no ghosting script
The Accountant
1st matchmaker match, 31 years old, lives in BK, his dad has also passed away, easy to talk to, on the third date she wasn’t sure if she saw a future with him and in her gut doesn’t feel like this would be a slow burn, Ali breaks things off with him, months (?) later he sent Ali a 5 min long voice memo and they said they were both down to see each other as friends. He later on dated and ghosted Erica
The Aussie
Matched on Hinge, in politics, from Australia but lived all over the place, asked Ali what she’s looking for on the first date and he said he’s “casually looking for something serious”, Ali accidentally walks up to a different person on their second date, Ali texts him saying she would love to see him before he leaves on a trip and she wasn’t happy that it took him till the next day to reply and he can’t see her before he leaves
The Goalie
Was supposed to be Ali’s 2nd match, he’s a paying client, Ali didn’t hear back from him for a while when she told him where she lived, he wrote to the matchmaker saying that she lived too far away even though it states where she lives in her matchmaker profile
The Journalist
2nd matchmaker match, ended things because she was dating/pursuing things with The Discoball and paused her matchmakers matches
The Threepeat
Matched multiple times on dating apps but this recent time with Hinge, Amazon seller, first date was a pizza lunch date (with bubbles aka champagne) and he gave her a single yellow carnation, talked a lot about her “side hustles” aka her food blog, coaching, FMH and the pod (Ali didn’t mentioned the name on FMH), had an awkward half kiss during the date and then gave her a peck when they said goodbye, he had no night stands by his bed?, spent the night but told public pod they had a movie night, different kissing styles, 6 dates, broke things off with Ali two days before her first date with The Rower WHILE Ali was on a Halloween girls trip
The Rower
Dated from Halloween 2021 till early Feb 2022, Pisces who is 6 days older than Ali, has an ex-fiancé (they dated for 8 years, engaged for two of them, she broke off the engagement with him 1.5 years ago once he started dating Ali), has a shared dog with this ex, slept together around Xmas on the fourth date and Ali got a UTI, first time having “omg this is awesome sex” since ASV, first person Ali slept next to wearing an eye mask "that's a big step for me", had him watch 90 Day Fiancé, on New Years Day told her that he sees “long term relationship potential” with her but doesn’t want to be exclusive after 5 dates, “we didn’t talk all week”, he said he wasn’t as ready as he though to date someone seriously and “I don’t know why I don’t want to be in a relationship with you” they broke up over the phone, Ali said he’s a good human and wants to date someone like him, 3.5 weeks later Ali drunk texted him at 3:00 am saying “its really hard not to talk to you” which Ali said was a lie, he replied back (few days? A week later?) while Ali was on another date and it made her cry a bit, she replied back saying “the door is closed but not locked” in regards if he wants to get back together. “Fin… for now”
Matched on Hinge but didn’t go on a first date for two week, Gemini, used to be a singer in a band, moved from DC to NYC, went on 7 dates in 2022, had a dog w/ ex and ex got full custody once he moved, met one of his friends on the second date, slept with him on the second date “morning and night”, he tried to find the podcast without knowing the name, podcasted from his house in DC, he would send Ali photos of them together “all the time”, gave a virtual presentation from his hotel room, did Molly together in DC, had him watch 90 Day Fiancé, moved to BK (didn’t see each other for 2 months pre-move), had a sex-less sleepover (a milestone for Ali), he showed up for her on her dad’s death date (something that a person she’s dating has never done), used to listen to the pod but stopped before they stopped seeing each other, ghosted her after they had a talk about moving things forward to exclusive and Ali texted him something along the lines of “your silence is the answer” when she didn’t hear back from him for a week and he ghosted her. Ali said he sucks in #77 AUA
Lisbon
The Brit
M&M
The Come Back Kid
They went on 2-3 dates in Nov 2018 and reconnected in May 2022, "felt immediately comfortable", sat next to a very drunk lady on their second 1st date and was supportive but "didn't step on Ali's toes" when the drunk lady said something offensive to Ali, couldn’t remember if they slept together or not, knows about FMH, ghosted Ali
The Trainer
The Cold Brew
The Nomad
3rd matchmaker match, reminded Ali of The Oyster, wanted kids and didn’t want to live in NYC forever, Ali was upset at first because her matchmaker was supposed to screen for that but the matchmaker DID check and it wasn’t mentioned when she was screening The Nomad, no second date because those are dealbreakers to him
The Catcher
Matched on Bumble, “good not great” after their first date, ~April 2022, talked about sports a lot on their first date
The Gentleman
4th matchmaker match, knew about Ali’s FMH socials before their date, Ali didn’t like his texting style, awkward intro on their first date “like hugging a 2 x 4”, he runs a dating event company and actually email Ali to be a guest on the pod when FMH first started, awkward goodbye, didn’t discuss the actual first date on the main pod because she doesn’t want to give him a reason to reach out again
The Tennis Pro
Ali had a good time on their date, “He is an adult, he’s mature” BUT “I don’t think he was into it”
The Padre
Matched on Bumble, 3 dates, from San Diego, “energy mismatch”, doesn’t want to know or listen to FMH, no psychical connection/kiss, only a kiss on the cheek on their last date, “I haven’t spoken to him since Friday night [a week]”, she didn’t want to do what The Threepeat did to her (break up while on vacation/traveling), she said it might be a MOO
5th matchmaker match, found him on Bumble before their in-person date, ghosted Ali AND the matchmaker???
6th matchmaker match
Last match and Ali states she will not talk about this date or anything about it
JFK Kirk?
Matched on Bumble, didn’t realize he’s located in SD, exchanged personal instagram info, not sure where things went or how things ended
Kirk #1
Met in the wild, make out a lot the night they met, “stealing kisses throughout the night”, exchanged numbers, planned a date (no specifics, just the day) but when Ali texted him day of he asked to reschedule (no specifics again), he replied back that he’s picking up a rental car, told him she’s looking for someone to respect her time and he never replied back
First date of 2023, matched on The League, first nickname was “League Kirk”, hard to talk to, felt like Ali was always reaching for the next topic, likes to travel, “there wasn’t a vibe”, MOO
The Roommate
Used to be her friend’s roommate and have met before (Ali doesn’t remember but it was the day after that exclusive convo with The Rower), “totally cute”, reunited at their mutual friend’s engagement party January 2023, made out at the bar, comes back to her place and sleeps over (no sex), Ali questions why her friends never set them up and its because he was taking a break from dating, first date they made out a lot at the bar (again), “I really felt like we were already a couple”, “It didn’t feel like a first date”, mentions her FMH content has popped up on his FYP, tried texting him after their date and he wasn’t giving effort, she’s glad she didn’t sleep with him because “one night stands aren’t my thing”, MOO
The Belgian
Matched on Bumble, accidentally had their first date during a trivia night at a bar, easy to talk to
The Viking
Ali forgot they had a first date on the day of said date
Tinder Man
Matched on Tinder (duh) on Valentine’s Day, first Tinder date in three years, good convo on first date but got a pushy vibe from him at the second bar they went to, put his hand up her sweater and was kissing her in the bar, made Ali uncomfortable and she told him that after her asked her on a second date
The Historian
Matched on Bumble, good conversation on the first date with a wide range of topics like “urban planning and its impact on feminism”, he’s in grad school
The Georgian
Matched on Hinge, he asked if she was free on Friday and she said yes but didn’t hear back from him in two days and in that time she made plans for Friday, rescheduled for a Saturday afternoon date at a dive bar, ate on her way to her date “it would be next level rude to eat on the subway”, good first date, talked about places he wants to take her to
The Publicist
Matched on Tinder, lives in BK, Jewish, one year younger then Ali, good first date, invited him to the Chaotic Singles Party that night, came over to Ali's apartment (which Ali said was messy) before and he made her favorite cocktail for her, a couple of listeners met him at the CSP, goofy and silly convo mixed with deep and serious convos, second date was at the Brooklyn Botanical Gardens and a tasting menu dinner, he made a Resy reservation and Ali got an email saying she was added to it ”fuck receiving gifts, THAT’S my love language”, he's into words like Ali, he sneezed and Ali said "God bless you" but then corrected herself and said "gesundheit" and he leaned over and kissed her and said he loves that she cares about her words, he met her friends on the third date ”It felt so easy. It felt so comfortable”, her friends took “sneaky” picture and videos of them together which Ali said she loves a sneaky pic, took all their date recap videos on his phone, cooked Ali steak on their fourth date, "it's very comfortable", had him watch 90 Day Fiancé, Ali met two of his friends and some of his teammates he plays a rec sport with, had sex the day they took a trip outside of the city, Erica met him before their trip to Greece and I said “he’s dorky in a good way”, WhatsApp video chatted while in Greece and told her “see you in two days!” at the end of their call, said she felt less anxious about him compared to other relationships while on vacation, sent him a birthday present while she was in Greece, felt an energy shift coming back from vacation and didn’t hear back from him 3 days after she came home, Ali requested a call to talk about this distances she was feeling, ”I did the 12 date rule and it didn’t work!”, she said the distance help her see that they’re not compatible, went on a total of 9 dates. Ali talks about the “break up” on episode 123
Mr. Chaotic
Matched on Tinder but he saw Ali at the Chaotic Singles Party and Cassidy the host is there mutual friend, went to a brewery and played games on their first date (Ali said this was her favorite first dates in episode 147 where they recapped 2023), works in entertainment industry, very high energy, knows about FMH and he said she's entertaining to watch, splits his time between NYC and some unknown city, texted while she was in Greece, ”The man gives good texts”
Random Matchmaker Match
Withdrew his match to Ali because he found her FMH socials. Talked about on #71 AUA
Gone with the Wind
Matchmaker match, said some gross things about women in volleyball outfits on their first date, Ali told her matchmaker about this, ”I would describe him as misogynistic overall”, Ali was glad he did say those weird things so early on so she didn’t waste her time, the matchmaker flagged his account. This was around June 2023
The Rock
Ali knows him from an activity that they used to be involved with in the city (she's very vague about what this is) from 8 years ago, he had a very serious/long term GF when they met, follows her personal Insta, has never talked about him because he’s never been a “prospect”, summer 2023 they met up to catch up and found out that he’s now recently single but he’s moving out of NYC for work, Ali texts Cindy saying she thinks this is a date, Cindy said to tell him that you really want to kiss him, he ends up telling Ali “I really want to kiss you”, made out at the bar, Ali invited him back to her apartment and they had sex the night before Ali ended things with The Publicist, “one night stand vibes” but she said she was down to do it again, Patreon only and talked about on #75 AUA
The Tourist
Matched on Hinge, just moved to Brooklynn, went to a brewery in BK for their first date, Ali showed up to the date dripping in sweat, allergic to cats, he sent Ali a ‘no ghosting’ text the next morning
The Stout
Matched on Bumble, ”we had really great banter right away”, laughed the whole time on their first date, talked about going on a second date during their first date
Speed Racer
Matched on Bumble, drinks first date, axe throwing second date, made out after their second date, MOO, randomly texted Ali ~6 months later because he said one of Ali’s date recap videos about him popped up on his FYP (Ali and Erica think this is a lie), he thought Ali wasn’t into him, he claims he was doing all the work with texting even though there was only a few messages since they exchanged numbers after their second date
Billy Joel
Recently sober, Ali said she felt like they had several inside jokes before they met in person, ate pizza on her way to their first date, second date was getting coffee and going to the museum, they cooked dinner together for their third date at Ali’s apartment and they watched 90 Day Fiancé (he didn’t like it), he Googled how to clean a red wine stain when it spilled on her countertop, he asked if she wanted to have sex and she turned it down, the next day/the day before a 7am flight Ali booty called him and they had sex, she was drunk and said the sex wasn’t good/they stopped mid way, helped Ali pack for her flight, Ali said he’s at a crossroad and he doesn’t seem like a long term fit, Erica found a condom on the ground while cat sitting, Ali said she didn’t regret hooking up with him but wishes she hadn’t done it, MOO
Sales Cycle
30 seconds in and Ali said he was very boring, only really talked about his job, stared at Ali’s boobs, “might be a MOO”, texted her ‘merry christmas’
Matched on The League, 34 years old, requested a nickname change from Pie Guy to Dr. Laundry, he had to cancel their second date because he got hit by a car, went on two dates, Ali sent him a pic of his subway stop saying something along the lines of “the stop isn’t looking as cute today” and turns out someone he dated with in that photo, were supposed to go on a third date the night she got back from a bachelorette party but he didn't answer her text when she said she landed, the next day he asked her how her trip was not acknowledging her previous text at all, Ali expressed her disappointment and he replied that he was tired last night, she said she would've been understanding if he said something then ghosted her
Andddd I stopped listening to the podcast around the Dr. Pie Laundry Guy but have stayed up to date with everything via this sub.
I have a huge interest in dating culture, human behavior and data similar to Ali and this little project of mine was really interesting once I got the framework of this list. I started this list once I found this sub in December 2023 and started re listening to the Patreon while working out (and lost 10 lbs ayeee) and writing down information in my notes app. I did my best to keep this list unbiased and just give facts and information that was said.
My own thoughts after making this list is that I'm very sad for Ali. I didn't realize the extent of her dating history. I think about my own dating history or even my friends who are in their 30's and dating and Ali's dating lore runs so deep. Is Ali unlucky with love? Did she pass on someone that could have been great for her? How has she had so many dates with little success in a long term partner or even going beyond 6-8 dates? Or is Skyline the person she has been waiting for? What's the pattern with all this dates/men? So many questions.
I truly do hope Ali finds her guy because I believe theres someone for everyone. Until then, I'll be hopping into this sub (cause y'all are too funny and give the best advice) and waiting for Ali to find Mr. Height.
Enjoy and I look forward to everyone thoughts! I'll keep my eye out for any edits that need to be made.
Bonus quotes:
“Longest relationship was a little under a year and a half. Haven’t made it past 6 months with anyone else” - AUA #7 11/27/21
“I spent the first 10+ years of my dating life being sort of perennially single” -1. The Actual First One episode 2/21/21
"I think my parent's story is the reason why I think that I can romantically get back together with an ex and it'll work out" -The Dave Glaser Podcast 4/5/21
“Almost every relationship I’ve ever been in, with a couple of exceptions, started as a situationship.” -21. The Undefined One 7/11/21
“All of my boyfriends have been white” -Ali’s BFF Special on Patreon 4/23/22
“You definitely need an older guy” -Cindy on Ali’s BFF Special on Patreon 4/23/22
“I’ve been on the dating apps since high school. Dating websites at the time” -Ali’s BFF Special on Patreon 4/23/22
“Who would be the perfect man for Ali?”
“Clearly a combination of the The Dentist and [the early stages of] The Buffalo” -Cindy on Ali’s BFF Special on Patreon 4/23/22
“Do you consider The Rower or Disco ball to have been situationships?”
“No, I don't consider either The Rower or The Disco Ball to be situationships” -question asked on TikTok 11/9/22
submitted by pizzapillowfort to findingmrheight [link] [comments]
A couple of notes before you read (or after because I would just jump into the list right away too)
- Direct quotes from Ali herself are in italics.
- I tried my best to keep everything in timeline order. Some people like The Come Back Kid I placed in the order where they reconnected/talked about on the pod. But I did my best to note this.
- All this information came from the FMH podcast, the Patreon, the original FMH blog, TikTok and other podcast that feature FMH/Ali. I also crossed reference information with this sub. I got most of this done with the help of the Patreon and listening to 1.75x speed but I lost accessed to the Patreon because my subscription ended.
- I'm open to edits! Things around the matchmaker era confused me and if anything is incorrect or if I'm missing someone, please let me know! I will note where corrections are made.
- Some people don't have anything simply because only a name was said or I couldn't find any details about the person/date
- And of course, please be respectful of all the sub rules!
- Mr. Adorable aka The Coach
- Trouble
- Waffles
- Future Husband Brian (FHB)
- Cookie
- Peter Pan
- Ambiguous Goodbye Guy
- Bad Bitch Man
Mentioned on Tiktok and on the pod once
Myspace Boyfriend
Mentioned on Tiktok
Third Boyfriend
Met on eCrush.com in 2002 and this was mentioned on the Cracked Up podcast, The Dave Glaser Podcast and Tiktok
The Kiwi
Met on a 2 week Model UN type youth trip in high school when Ali was 15, never a boyfriend but she had a huge crush on him, he tried to kiss Ali and she literally ran away, didn’t talk the rest of the trip but exchanged numbers and screen names (Ali’s was FineGal13 or BeachJewel760), she made him a mixtape cd called “Ali’s really cool mix for The Kiwi” but never sent it and she still has it. In 2021, he DM’d her when she posted photos of her and her mom in France and invites her to visit him in London, she says she can’t but says they should catch up if he comes to NYC
Fourth Boyfriend
Met on OkCupid when you had to use it on the computer, this was mentioned on Tiktok
The Homecoming Date or Light Switch
First boyfriend? (she goes back and forth calling him her first bf or a situationship), a family friend, a month younger than Ali, dated in high school but went to different high schools, football player, made him ask her to her Homecoming dance over email (her words), Ali hid in the bathroom the whole Homecoming dance, 3-4 revisits of this situations as adults, saw him on Bumble a few years ago and texted him that he had a typo in his bio, “he very much wanted to be with me” and now he’s married with a kid. His mom is still “obsessed” with Ali and she listens to FMH
Random college guy
Freshman year of college, Ali doesn’t have a nickname for him/doesn’t remember his real name, met this guy through a friend, was texting him to invite him over to hot tub but her phone autocorrected to “how about some hot rubbing tonight?” but Ali didn’t noticed/didn’t correct it and he never replied, Ali had a house party and got really drunk and was all over him, he left the party early, she messaged him on MySpace 3-4 times asking why he left
The Resident
Matched on Match.com, first guy she dated in NYC after college, older than Ali, a doctor, lasted 3 months ”maybe”, he didn’t like Ali’s friends, got a card from him on her birthday and it said “Love, The Resident” and it took Ali back a little, Ali drinks black coffee because of him, he coordinated having her mom visit NYC for her birthday then he broke up with her a week later
The Ghost
Met at a bar when she was 25, turns out they matched on OkCupid and they already had a date scheduled next week, they dated for 6-8 weeks, had sleepovers, “The worst ghosting experience I’ve ever had”, he borrowed The Great Gatsby from Ali’s roommate, planned to make dinner together after a beach trip in August with her friends and never showed up, Ali is blowing up his phone and gets no reply, two weeks later she finally texts “are you alive? check yes or no” and he responds “Yes”, Ali then ask if he could return the book and gets no reply again, 5 months go by and she receives the book in the mail with the note: “Here’s the book back. Sorry. P.S. sorry about last summer. I was in a bad place. You’re a great person and your salmon is amazing”, since then she has ran into him twice on the streets and matched with him on Bumble
The Coach/Mr. Adorable
First serious boyfriend at 26/27 in 2013, matched on Match.com or met through work depending if you’re listening to the pod or reading her OG blog, clean-cut look, played volleyball, Ali invited him to a friend’s birthday party and they made out in the streets at 4am, on their second date he asked Ali if she was seeing any one and when Ali said no he ask her to be his girlfriend 3 days after their first date, dated for almost 1.5 years or almost 2 years depending on if you’re listening to the pod or the Patreon, first time saying “I love you” to a guy, “lovely guy“, never would posted Ali on his instagram until Ali said something, he “lived” with her for two weeks while he was in between apartments, tried blind folding/hair pulling during sex and she didn’t like it, by the end of their relationship Ali didn’t like sex and thought she wasn’t a very sexual person, after they broke up Ali drunk texted him at 2am and he picked her up and she spent the night and she took her things in the morning in a rolly suitcase, from her blog in 2015: “I just want to be careful I don’t end up with another Mr. Adorable situation, where I find myself dating my platonic best friend”, had drinks with him in 2016 from the blog: “Not in a romantic way (at least on my end)”, Ali still talks to him sometimes through casual instagram DMs, he’s currently (as of 2021) dating someone for 4+ years and Ali thinks they’re going to get engaged
Trouble
OG 2015 FMH blog, never mentioned on the pod, “I was immediately enamored with him”, met at a Beer Olympic party but he worked with one of Ali’s best friends (Ali was still dating The Coach at the time), lived in BK, tattoos and stubble, Ali’s best friend said he was a “fuck boy”, “he very much made me see that it was the right thing for me and The Coach to not be together”, from her blog in 2015: “he has this look in his eye like he’s constantly laughing at me – in a super sexy way”, he texted her saying he didn’t see anything romantically with her and she sent a gif of someone shrugging
Personal side note: Ali has mentioned she has cheated on someone but never disclosed who she cheated on or with. I feel like she cheated on Mr.A/The Coach with Trouble because of the timeline. Just a guess.
Waffles
Matched on Bumble, OG 2015 FMH blog, he asked Ali fuck/marry/kill breakfast foods, dated 2 months around summer time, on Fourth of July while watching fireworks he said how they had a great day and Ali replied with something along the lines with “yeah, it would be better if I could call you my boyfriend”, he said he wanted a relationship but just not with Ali and shortly afterwards they stopped seeing each other
The Buffalo
Lived in Buffalo NY, 6’5, Scorpio, met in 2015 at Adults National volleyball (Ali’s team won that year) where he was heckling her while she was playing, asks Ali’s mom for her number and Ali’s mom said “I guess you’re tall enough” and told him to ask her himself, he flew her out and she met his parents, dated over summer, exclusive but never boyfriend/girlfriend (but called him her LD boyfriend on TikTok), texted and talked on the phone a lot, Ali’s best friend’s favorite ex “they had really good banter”, in October he invited her to his cousins wedding and she invited him to her friends wedding, after Ali bought her ticket to his cousins wedding (with the promise he would buy her ticket to her friend’s wedding) he ghosted and stonewalled her, she “poured her heart out to him on voicemail” and he never replied, she asked him to pay her back for her ticket and he got mad that she “made this about money”, 2 years later he told Ali that he freaked out because he really liked her and saw a future with her but knew she would never move to Buffalo and it would “never work”, Ali said at the time she would have considered moving for him, Ali used to have him blocked on Facebook and told all her friends not to update her on info about him (unless she asked). He’s now married and goes to Disney with his wife (which Ali kind of scoffs at?), Ali said on TikTok that she dodged a bullet
Baby Bic
Met him at Adults National years ago, had a flirtationship with him in 2016 when he was 19 years old, ran into him at the Adults Nationals 2021, last texts she got from him were about getting his fake ID taken away at the bar and him visiting her in NYC but Ali didn’t want to buy him beer and drink at her apartment
The Chef
Matched on Tinder around 2016, he loved karaoke, “total shit”, asked Ali to be his girlfriend and to meet his mom after a month, off and on dating, broke up the first time because he was talking to his ex, lied and flew to Mexico to see his ex while dating Ali, that ex sent Ali a Snapchat of them in bed together on that Mexico trip, Ali broke up with him via text and called him a shitty boyfriend, he’s the reason Ali deleted her Snapchat because of drunk Snaps he would send post break up, FB messaged Ali 6 years later (while Roark was visiting/staying with Ali) and said sorry for being a shit head. Ali’s best friends hated him
The Dentist
Met on Halloween in the wild, Canadian, dated NYE 2016- May 2017 “nice guy, not my guy”, one of Ali’s best friend’s favorite ex “he adored you, “he was too sweet for me” and “he had no edge to him”, he painted Ali’s cat for her 30th birthday but she was annoyed it was just Rory and not both cats, The Chef texted Ali while on a date/sleeping at his house
ASV - Aspiring Sober Vegan
Met through a friend (her best guy friend’s college roommate) the day before she had to fly out to her dad’s memorial, a doctor, into meditation, remembered him “being cuter” when they went on a first date, felt “the spark”, had “omg this is awesome sex”, Ali described this relationship as a “slow burn” and “the most attracted she ever been to a partner” even thought she didn’t think he was that cute in the beginning, dated 2-3 months before he tried to ghost Ali but they talked and broke up, four months later they start casually dating/FWB because he’s moving but this turns into a ‘middle distance relationship’ and he moves to Philly, had a lot of communication issues but didn't have a lot of fights, wants to live in Ohio and give a % of his income to charity, Ali was close to saying ‘I love you’ but didn’t, he uninvited her to meet his extended family and they got in a fight, broke up with her a couple weeks before their 6 month anniversary at the park while on a picnic and told her that she’s still his favorite person, Ali used to think he was “the one that got away” and would frequently have dreams about him. From what Ali knows, he's sober but not vegan
The Scientist
2017 or 2018ish, from San Diego, went on one date, Ali ended up ghosting him due to the decline in her dad’s health, saw him on Hinge while she was in San Diego for 3 months in 2020, texted him and apologized for ghosting him, ended up going on 2-3 more dates, took a selfie in front of his house and sent it to him but acted like she didn’t know that was his house and made a TikTok about it, things ended up not working but she doesn’t make it clear on who ended it. She can now see she shouldn’t have been going on dates during this time when her dad was sick.
Good on Paper Divorced Dude
Met a couple of years ago (she told this story on TikTok in 2020) on Bumble
The Groomsman
Met at her friend Ashley’s wedding in Chicago Oct 2019, had a “two night stand” with him, texted/talked/FT’d for 3-4 months, divorced, never dated seriously/FWB, saw each other a couple time when he came to NYC, Ali stopped talking with him due to FMH and her trying to find a serious relationship, he starts dating someone, follows FMH on insta, slid into her DM in 2022 and then sent her soup while she was sick, turns out he’s single again, 2 months later Ali is heading to Chicago and texts him “Hello! Reminder that my arrival to your neck of the woods is imminent” and turns out he is now seeing someone and Ali doesn’t see him while in Chicago (at least she doesn’t mention it)
Unnicknamed person
He was her plus one at her best friend from college’s NYE wedding 2019/2020, met and hung out with Ali’s mom, posted photos of them together on her personal Insta story, “fully dating but weren’t official hehe” doesn’t have a nickname/never gave him a nickname? This could be The Latvian/the person she texted her friend in DC about saying “I think I’m on a date with my husband”
Starts FMH on January 2020 on Instagram/TikTok
The TravelerHe was browsing Bumble while Ali was in the bathroom during their first date, he was banned from Bumble and was using his grandma phone number. Ali turned down a second date
The Duke
Early FMH, went for long periods of time in between texts, 7-8 Zoom dates while Ali was in San Diego and he was in NY, Ali said you could see three of his ex’s on his instagram page (without scrolling), they finally went on one date and it was “meh” but they did kiss on their date
The Oyster
Matched on Bumble (he had one photo and no bio) two weeks before Valentines Day, Gemini, a lawyer, part of the 13 First Dates in 30 Days series (he was #13), dated Feb 2020-Aug 2020, love bomber, felt “the spark” and became official after 3 dates, best first date ever??? at the time, said “I love you” to Ali after two weeks, “For most of my relationship with The Oyster, he didn’t live in the city he had moved to Connecticut without telling me”, would fight all the time, opposite political views, Ali felt like a “fucking summer camp director” because she planned all their dates and he would get upset if Ali didn't have a plan, sought out a therapist (Megan) because of her relationship struggles because of him, went to Mass/church, he wanted a traditional marriage/life/wife/kids (at one point had Ali thinking she wanted that), didn’t want to live in NYC, didn’t support BLM, Cindy hated him
The Pilot
Went on 3 dates, texted a lot, didn’t hear back from him in four days and when she said she was looking to date someone who showed more consistency, he replied saying he met someone the day after their last date who seems to have more free time than Ali and he wants to pursue that but would like to be friends, Ali said on TikTok that this other women “bent her schedule to his schedule” and she was unwilling to do that. Mostly talked about him on TikTok
The Analyst
Matched on Bumble two years ago and went on one date, re matched in 2021 and he stood Ali up, she send him a text “getting stood up” script and he never replied. Only mentioned him on TikTok (?)
Ali and Roark start FMH: The Podcast February 2021
The BoomerangFirst date on the pod? I couldn't find anything else about him
The Scuba Diver
The Music Man
One date, “he didn’t do anything wrong, he’s just not for me”, amped up small talk, complimented Ali a lot which made her feel awkward cause she wasn’t feeling it, he texted her and asked for a second date and Ali sent the no ghosting script
The Bet
Uses the phrase “ok bet”, 28 years old shoe designer, only went on one dinner date to a spot he picked, turns out its cash only and he didn’t bring cash, was not into him , not looking for the same thing
The Dinosaur
Nickname was previously The Hawaiian, first date at Dinosaur BBQ, stood in a parking spot to save for Ali, he asked for a kiss after their date and Ali declined saying maybe next time
The Rose
He sent her a rose on hinge, first date was an hour long walk in the park while drinking beer
The Comic
Matched on Hinge, older than Ali (Ali’s friends express how happy they were to hear that), had brunch on their first date (was the first part of a double header but the second guy canceled), listed as “moderate” politically on Hinge, good and easy convo, went back and forth twice over text and then never heard back from him, “technically not ghosting...”
The Camper
Met in the wild at a volleyball tournament in July, lives in Chicago, 27 years old, hung out the whole time, over heard Ali asking someone to get her a make out partner, gave Ali his number, drunkly ask him for a FT date in the future and he didn’t reply, Ali texts him again about a volleyball thing and he replied back with not a lot of enthusiasm, Ali is going to Chicago in Sept for a volleyball tournament and she’s already planning on playing 4-on-4 with her best friend vs. his roommate and maybe The Camper, he texts her saying he has to work on the date of the tournament and won’t be able to do the 4-on-4 game, “I feel like I got broken up with someone I never want to date in the first place”
Ali’s Matchmaker contract starts in August 2021 - 6 matches
The SchmoozerWent on a dinner date, was chatting up the waitress in a kind of creepy way, was bragging about a lot of things and it turned Ali off and Ali texted him her no ghosting script
The Accountant
1st matchmaker match, 31 years old, lives in BK, his dad has also passed away, easy to talk to, on the third date she wasn’t sure if she saw a future with him and in her gut doesn’t feel like this would be a slow burn, Ali breaks things off with him, months (?) later he sent Ali a 5 min long voice memo and they said they were both down to see each other as friends. He later on dated and ghosted Erica
The Aussie
Matched on Hinge, in politics, from Australia but lived all over the place, asked Ali what she’s looking for on the first date and he said he’s “casually looking for something serious”, Ali accidentally walks up to a different person on their second date, Ali texts him saying she would love to see him before he leaves on a trip and she wasn’t happy that it took him till the next day to reply and he can’t see her before he leaves
The Goalie
Was supposed to be Ali’s 2nd match, he’s a paying client, Ali didn’t hear back from him for a while when she told him where she lived, he wrote to the matchmaker saying that she lived too far away even though it states where she lives in her matchmaker profile
The Journalist
2nd matchmaker match, ended things because she was dating/pursuing things with The Discoball and paused her matchmakers matches
The Threepeat
Matched multiple times on dating apps but this recent time with Hinge, Amazon seller, first date was a pizza lunch date (with bubbles aka champagne) and he gave her a single yellow carnation, talked a lot about her “side hustles” aka her food blog, coaching, FMH and the pod (Ali didn’t mentioned the name on FMH), had an awkward half kiss during the date and then gave her a peck when they said goodbye, he had no night stands by his bed?, spent the night but told public pod they had a movie night, different kissing styles, 6 dates, broke things off with Ali two days before her first date with The Rower WHILE Ali was on a Halloween girls trip
The Rower
Dated from Halloween 2021 till early Feb 2022, Pisces who is 6 days older than Ali, has an ex-fiancé (they dated for 8 years, engaged for two of them, she broke off the engagement with him 1.5 years ago once he started dating Ali), has a shared dog with this ex, slept together around Xmas on the fourth date and Ali got a UTI, first time having “omg this is awesome sex” since ASV, first person Ali slept next to wearing an eye mask "that's a big step for me", had him watch 90 Day Fiancé, on New Years Day told her that he sees “long term relationship potential” with her but doesn’t want to be exclusive after 5 dates, “we didn’t talk all week”, he said he wasn’t as ready as he though to date someone seriously and “I don’t know why I don’t want to be in a relationship with you” they broke up over the phone, Ali said he’s a good human and wants to date someone like him, 3.5 weeks later Ali drunk texted him at 3:00 am saying “its really hard not to talk to you” which Ali said was a lie, he replied back (few days? A week later?) while Ali was on another date and it made her cry a bit, she replied back saying “the door is closed but not locked” in regards if he wants to get back together. “Fin… for now”
2022
The DiscoballMatched on Hinge but didn’t go on a first date for two week, Gemini, used to be a singer in a band, moved from DC to NYC, went on 7 dates in 2022, had a dog w/ ex and ex got full custody once he moved, met one of his friends on the second date, slept with him on the second date “morning and night”, he tried to find the podcast without knowing the name, podcasted from his house in DC, he would send Ali photos of them together “all the time”, gave a virtual presentation from his hotel room, did Molly together in DC, had him watch 90 Day Fiancé, moved to BK (didn’t see each other for 2 months pre-move), had a sex-less sleepover (a milestone for Ali), he showed up for her on her dad’s death date (something that a person she’s dating has never done), used to listen to the pod but stopped before they stopped seeing each other, ghosted her after they had a talk about moving things forward to exclusive and Ali texted him something along the lines of “your silence is the answer” when she didn’t hear back from him for a week and he ghosted her. Ali said he sucks in #77 AUA
Lisbon
The Brit
M&M
The Come Back Kid
They went on 2-3 dates in Nov 2018 and reconnected in May 2022, "felt immediately comfortable", sat next to a very drunk lady on their second 1st date and was supportive but "didn't step on Ali's toes" when the drunk lady said something offensive to Ali, couldn’t remember if they slept together or not, knows about FMH, ghosted Ali
The Trainer
The Cold Brew
The Nomad
3rd matchmaker match, reminded Ali of The Oyster, wanted kids and didn’t want to live in NYC forever, Ali was upset at first because her matchmaker was supposed to screen for that but the matchmaker DID check and it wasn’t mentioned when she was screening The Nomad, no second date because those are dealbreakers to him
The Catcher
Matched on Bumble, “good not great” after their first date, ~April 2022, talked about sports a lot on their first date
The Gentleman
4th matchmaker match, knew about Ali’s FMH socials before their date, Ali didn’t like his texting style, awkward intro on their first date “like hugging a 2 x 4”, he runs a dating event company and actually email Ali to be a guest on the pod when FMH first started, awkward goodbye, didn’t discuss the actual first date on the main pod because she doesn’t want to give him a reason to reach out again
The Tennis Pro
Ali had a good time on their date, “He is an adult, he’s mature” BUT “I don’t think he was into it”
The Padre
Matched on Bumble, 3 dates, from San Diego, “energy mismatch”, doesn’t want to know or listen to FMH, no psychical connection/kiss, only a kiss on the cheek on their last date, “I haven’t spoken to him since Friday night [a week]”, she didn’t want to do what The Threepeat did to her (break up while on vacation/traveling), she said it might be a MOO
Roark leaves and Erica joins the pod Oct 31st 2022
Captain Kirk5th matchmaker match, found him on Bumble before their in-person date, ghosted Ali AND the matchmaker???
6th matchmaker match
Last match and Ali states she will not talk about this date or anything about it
JFK Kirk?
Matched on Bumble, didn’t realize he’s located in SD, exchanged personal instagram info, not sure where things went or how things ended
Kirk #1
Met in the wild, make out a lot the night they met, “stealing kisses throughout the night”, exchanged numbers, planned a date (no specifics, just the day) but when Ali texted him day of he asked to reschedule (no specifics again), he replied back that he’s picking up a rental car, told him she’s looking for someone to respect her time and he never replied back
2023
The FalconFirst date of 2023, matched on The League, first nickname was “League Kirk”, hard to talk to, felt like Ali was always reaching for the next topic, likes to travel, “there wasn’t a vibe”, MOO
The Roommate
Used to be her friend’s roommate and have met before (Ali doesn’t remember but it was the day after that exclusive convo with The Rower), “totally cute”, reunited at their mutual friend’s engagement party January 2023, made out at the bar, comes back to her place and sleeps over (no sex), Ali questions why her friends never set them up and its because he was taking a break from dating, first date they made out a lot at the bar (again), “I really felt like we were already a couple”, “It didn’t feel like a first date”, mentions her FMH content has popped up on his FYP, tried texting him after their date and he wasn’t giving effort, she’s glad she didn’t sleep with him because “one night stands aren’t my thing”, MOO
The Belgian
Matched on Bumble, accidentally had their first date during a trivia night at a bar, easy to talk to
The Viking
Ali forgot they had a first date on the day of said date
Tinder Man
Matched on Tinder (duh) on Valentine’s Day, first Tinder date in three years, good convo on first date but got a pushy vibe from him at the second bar they went to, put his hand up her sweater and was kissing her in the bar, made Ali uncomfortable and she told him that after her asked her on a second date
The Historian
Matched on Bumble, good conversation on the first date with a wide range of topics like “urban planning and its impact on feminism”, he’s in grad school
The Georgian
Matched on Hinge, he asked if she was free on Friday and she said yes but didn’t hear back from him in two days and in that time she made plans for Friday, rescheduled for a Saturday afternoon date at a dive bar, ate on her way to her date “it would be next level rude to eat on the subway”, good first date, talked about places he wants to take her to
The Publicist
Matched on Tinder, lives in BK, Jewish, one year younger then Ali, good first date, invited him to the Chaotic Singles Party that night, came over to Ali's apartment (which Ali said was messy) before and he made her favorite cocktail for her, a couple of listeners met him at the CSP, goofy and silly convo mixed with deep and serious convos, second date was at the Brooklyn Botanical Gardens and a tasting menu dinner, he made a Resy reservation and Ali got an email saying she was added to it ”fuck receiving gifts, THAT’S my love language”, he's into words like Ali, he sneezed and Ali said "God bless you" but then corrected herself and said "gesundheit" and he leaned over and kissed her and said he loves that she cares about her words, he met her friends on the third date ”It felt so easy. It felt so comfortable”, her friends took “sneaky” picture and videos of them together which Ali said she loves a sneaky pic, took all their date recap videos on his phone, cooked Ali steak on their fourth date, "it's very comfortable", had him watch 90 Day Fiancé, Ali met two of his friends and some of his teammates he plays a rec sport with, had sex the day they took a trip outside of the city, Erica met him before their trip to Greece and I said “he’s dorky in a good way”, WhatsApp video chatted while in Greece and told her “see you in two days!” at the end of their call, said she felt less anxious about him compared to other relationships while on vacation, sent him a birthday present while she was in Greece, felt an energy shift coming back from vacation and didn’t hear back from him 3 days after she came home, Ali requested a call to talk about this distances she was feeling, ”I did the 12 date rule and it didn’t work!”, she said the distance help her see that they’re not compatible, went on a total of 9 dates. Ali talks about the “break up” on episode 123
Mr. Chaotic
Matched on Tinder but he saw Ali at the Chaotic Singles Party and Cassidy the host is there mutual friend, went to a brewery and played games on their first date (Ali said this was her favorite first dates in episode 147 where they recapped 2023), works in entertainment industry, very high energy, knows about FMH and he said she's entertaining to watch, splits his time between NYC and some unknown city, texted while she was in Greece, ”The man gives good texts”
Random Matchmaker Match
Withdrew his match to Ali because he found her FMH socials. Talked about on #71 AUA
Gone with the Wind
Matchmaker match, said some gross things about women in volleyball outfits on their first date, Ali told her matchmaker about this, ”I would describe him as misogynistic overall”, Ali was glad he did say those weird things so early on so she didn’t waste her time, the matchmaker flagged his account. This was around June 2023
The Rock
Ali knows him from an activity that they used to be involved with in the city (she's very vague about what this is) from 8 years ago, he had a very serious/long term GF when they met, follows her personal Insta, has never talked about him because he’s never been a “prospect”, summer 2023 they met up to catch up and found out that he’s now recently single but he’s moving out of NYC for work, Ali texts Cindy saying she thinks this is a date, Cindy said to tell him that you really want to kiss him, he ends up telling Ali “I really want to kiss you”, made out at the bar, Ali invited him back to her apartment and they had sex the night before Ali ended things with The Publicist, “one night stand vibes” but she said she was down to do it again, Patreon only and talked about on #75 AUA
The Tourist
Matched on Hinge, just moved to Brooklynn, went to a brewery in BK for their first date, Ali showed up to the date dripping in sweat, allergic to cats, he sent Ali a ‘no ghosting’ text the next morning
The Stout
Matched on Bumble, ”we had really great banter right away”, laughed the whole time on their first date, talked about going on a second date during their first date
Speed Racer
Matched on Bumble, drinks first date, axe throwing second date, made out after their second date, MOO, randomly texted Ali ~6 months later because he said one of Ali’s date recap videos about him popped up on his FYP (Ali and Erica think this is a lie), he thought Ali wasn’t into him, he claims he was doing all the work with texting even though there was only a few messages since they exchanged numbers after their second date
Billy Joel
Recently sober, Ali said she felt like they had several inside jokes before they met in person, ate pizza on her way to their first date, second date was getting coffee and going to the museum, they cooked dinner together for their third date at Ali’s apartment and they watched 90 Day Fiancé (he didn’t like it), he Googled how to clean a red wine stain when it spilled on her countertop, he asked if she wanted to have sex and she turned it down, the next day/the day before a 7am flight Ali booty called him and they had sex, she was drunk and said the sex wasn’t good/they stopped mid way, helped Ali pack for her flight, Ali said he’s at a crossroad and he doesn’t seem like a long term fit, Erica found a condom on the ground while cat sitting, Ali said she didn’t regret hooking up with him but wishes she hadn’t done it, MOO
Sales Cycle
30 seconds in and Ali said he was very boring, only really talked about his job, stared at Ali’s boobs, “might be a MOO”, texted her ‘merry christmas’
2024
Pie Guy/Dr. LaundryMatched on The League, 34 years old, requested a nickname change from Pie Guy to Dr. Laundry, he had to cancel their second date because he got hit by a car, went on two dates, Ali sent him a pic of his subway stop saying something along the lines of “the stop isn’t looking as cute today” and turns out someone he dated with in that photo, were supposed to go on a third date the night she got back from a bachelorette party but he didn't answer her text when she said she landed, the next day he asked her how her trip was not acknowledging her previous text at all, Ali expressed her disappointment and he replied that he was tired last night, she said she would've been understanding if he said something then ghosted her
Andddd I stopped listening to the podcast around the Dr. Pie Laundry Guy but have stayed up to date with everything via this sub.
I have a huge interest in dating culture, human behavior and data similar to Ali and this little project of mine was really interesting once I got the framework of this list. I started this list once I found this sub in December 2023 and started re listening to the Patreon while working out (and lost 10 lbs ayeee) and writing down information in my notes app. I did my best to keep this list unbiased and just give facts and information that was said.
My own thoughts after making this list is that I'm very sad for Ali. I didn't realize the extent of her dating history. I think about my own dating history or even my friends who are in their 30's and dating and Ali's dating lore runs so deep. Is Ali unlucky with love? Did she pass on someone that could have been great for her? How has she had so many dates with little success in a long term partner or even going beyond 6-8 dates? Or is Skyline the person she has been waiting for? What's the pattern with all this dates/men? So many questions.
I truly do hope Ali finds her guy because I believe theres someone for everyone. Until then, I'll be hopping into this sub (cause y'all are too funny and give the best advice) and waiting for Ali to find Mr. Height.
Enjoy and I look forward to everyone thoughts! I'll keep my eye out for any edits that need to be made.
Bonus quotes:
“Longest relationship was a little under a year and a half. Haven’t made it past 6 months with anyone else” - AUA #7 11/27/21
“I spent the first 10+ years of my dating life being sort of perennially single” -1. The Actual First One episode 2/21/21
"I think my parent's story is the reason why I think that I can romantically get back together with an ex and it'll work out" -The Dave Glaser Podcast 4/5/21
“Almost every relationship I’ve ever been in, with a couple of exceptions, started as a situationship.” -21. The Undefined One 7/11/21
“All of my boyfriends have been white” -Ali’s BFF Special on Patreon 4/23/22
“You definitely need an older guy” -Cindy on Ali’s BFF Special on Patreon 4/23/22
“I’ve been on the dating apps since high school. Dating websites at the time” -Ali’s BFF Special on Patreon 4/23/22
“Who would be the perfect man for Ali?”
“Clearly a combination of the The Dentist and [the early stages of] The Buffalo” -Cindy on Ali’s BFF Special on Patreon 4/23/22
“Do you consider The Rower or Disco ball to have been situationships?”
“No, I don't consider either The Rower or The Disco Ball to be situationships” -question asked on TikTok 11/9/22
2024.05.19 01:44 Mysterious-Okra-7885 Tiny Chonky Frog! 🐸
 | Look at his little grumpy face! 😂 submitted by Mysterious-Okra-7885 to crochet [link] [comments] I used the frog pattern from the Mini Pets pattern by Lucy Ravenscar Designs. It’s on both Ravelry and Etsy. It has a collection of several tiny critters as well as a fallen log and mushroom play mat that cinches shut to hold everything in together! I used a 2.75 mm hook and Frog Tree (🤭) sport weight alpaca yarn. And some 6 strand DMC cotton embroidery floss for the eyes and mouth. |
2024.05.19 01:06 hidefromthe_sun Some advice on starting to tailor my program towards activity specific training - I'm a cave diver.
So currently I work a four on four off shift pattern. Four days on are 12hr shifts in a sedentary role. On my four days off I hammer it right up to and sometimes a little bit beyond what's recoverable because I have four days off.
Routine at the moment is a bastardised 531 program for three of my four days off. I'm untrained following six months of depression. I've been working hard for the last 10 weeks since getting medicated for ADHD. It's night and day - I actually have consistency. I'm making decent progress and feeling stronger, looking better. I've been able to recomp at this point.
Gym days are as follows:
Day one: Deadlifts/overhead press then I work on accessory lifts mainly around the posterior chain.
Day two: Squats/bench press then accessory lifts based around my anterior chain.
Day three: Deadlifts/overhead press again with posterior chain accessories.
I'll alternative on each set of four off one set of four off it's as above, then the next will be squats/bench/anterior chain twice and DL/OHP/posterior chain once.
I also do around 5-6hrs of steady state easy cardio during that time. I use my four days working to recover. I'll do some light work with dead hangs, some pressups and pullups, static holds, some kettlebell work and a lot of stretching and some light walks.
I want to be the best cave diver I can be. I'm reaching the end of this cycle of building a good fitness base - I'm stronger, my cardio has improved.
So my goals are:
Hard carries into a cave with 40kg on my back so I might start with heavy farmers walks. We often rope into pitches and ascending a rope is hard work. The movements are very similar to climbing a rope so I'm thinking pull ups/narrow grip lat pulldowns and work on some squat variations. Rows and back extensions to strengthen my back.
I hit max heart rate getting the steel gas cylinders into a cave a lot.I'm going to dial down the zone 2 cardio and get a couple of HIIT sessions in a week. Cold water immersion for staying calm during the dive whilst under a lot of pressure.
Finning in the water comes from your ankles and calves so calve raises would work well too.
I'll continue with some dialled back compound exercises to maintain strength but that will already be a lot of volume.
What adjustments can I make to this plan? It's a very rough idea in my head and I've never programmed before so I need some advice or reading materials on getting this right.
Once properly structured, will this improve the areas I need to work on?
submitted by hidefromthe_sun to workout [link] [comments]
Routine at the moment is a bastardised 531 program for three of my four days off. I'm untrained following six months of depression. I've been working hard for the last 10 weeks since getting medicated for ADHD. It's night and day - I actually have consistency. I'm making decent progress and feeling stronger, looking better. I've been able to recomp at this point.
Gym days are as follows:
Day one: Deadlifts/overhead press then I work on accessory lifts mainly around the posterior chain.
Day two: Squats/bench press then accessory lifts based around my anterior chain.
Day three: Deadlifts/overhead press again with posterior chain accessories.
I'll alternative on each set of four off one set of four off it's as above, then the next will be squats/bench/anterior chain twice and DL/OHP/posterior chain once.
I also do around 5-6hrs of steady state easy cardio during that time. I use my four days working to recover. I'll do some light work with dead hangs, some pressups and pullups, static holds, some kettlebell work and a lot of stretching and some light walks.
I want to be the best cave diver I can be. I'm reaching the end of this cycle of building a good fitness base - I'm stronger, my cardio has improved.
So my goals are:
- Strengthen my back in general - it gets a hammering on a day out in the caves
- improve my cardio to lower my breathing rate and so I am better able to relax and get back to a resting heart rate to start the dive.
- Focus more on building endurance and strength in the muscles used on rope ascenders. Quads, glutes and a lot of upper body strength.
Hard carries into a cave with 40kg on my back so I might start with heavy farmers walks. We often rope into pitches and ascending a rope is hard work. The movements are very similar to climbing a rope so I'm thinking pull ups/narrow grip lat pulldowns and work on some squat variations. Rows and back extensions to strengthen my back.
I hit max heart rate getting the steel gas cylinders into a cave a lot.I'm going to dial down the zone 2 cardio and get a couple of HIIT sessions in a week. Cold water immersion for staying calm during the dive whilst under a lot of pressure.
Finning in the water comes from your ankles and calves so calve raises would work well too.
I'll continue with some dialled back compound exercises to maintain strength but that will already be a lot of volume.
What adjustments can I make to this plan? It's a very rough idea in my head and I've never programmed before so I need some advice or reading materials on getting this right.
Once properly structured, will this improve the areas I need to work on?
2024.05.18 22:33 JulianSkies Blackriver Cases - Season 10 “Days of Fury” - Episode 2 “Visiting Omen”
[ [FIRST] [NEXT>]
The first couple of days were boring, as usual- Blackriver is a small town, and the worst that had happened was Nila and Kessa making a few wellness checks after worried calls from neighbors. A couple of people in denial, a few ashamed at their own violent outbursts and a stern warning to Tamm about painting others’ properties without asking first.
This morning, however, began with an all-hands meeting. There were no meeting rooms in the office, so they made do in the general workspace room, they all stood there at the center while Keya looked them over.
“We have received a report from a neighboring city about a convoy of protestors making its way to Blackriver” she describes without tone. At this point nobody bothers interrupting.
“This convoy is comprised of approximately four hundred and seventy eight individuals of multiple species, primarily human and venlil but with operationally relevant representations of the entire spectrum of size and mobility types” her paws are behind her back, her ears focused directly ahead, her eyes centered to keep the entire team on the core of her focus “They have crossed multiple cities already, generally engaging in verbal sparring with any figure of authority, parading signs and banners denouncing all manners of authorities as well as occasionally engaging in physical altercations with officers.”
“They are also known to engage in vandalism. Though primarily aimed at exterminator and police precincts as well as public offices, they have already caused considerable collateral to others they have identified as ‘collaborators’” there’s a single heartbeat of waiting for breath before she continues “They have, however, not shown to be an incredibly organized group or one with a clear goal and objective. The convoy appears to contain only extremely emotionally charged people with no clear overarching goal.”
“We are incapable of dealing with the situation should they turn aggressive, as such we will be simply maintaining watch and relocating the populace should they become a problem.” Then, she picks up her holopad and passes it to Lunek beside her “They can only follow one path with the entire convoy, the central street, therefore I have divided it into four sectors. One of each will be assigned to a sector.”
First her ears turn to the first target “Lunek, sector one at the entrance. As the most approachable member of the precinct your task is to give an initial image of harmlessness. Do not engage first, do not take initiative against them. Ensure the members of the herd in the area are warned of their approach. If they become aggressive, retreat and focus on the escape of the herd.”
She tilts her head a little bit, turning her ears the other way “Marik, sector two. Mostly the commercial area, your task is ostensive protection to lower the chances of them initiating aggression. Whereas protection of the herd is first priority your second priority is ensuring Tenve’s Hardware Store as well as Sunbreeze Meals and Watchful Café remain capable of providing anyone whose residences become damaged.” suddenly, she turns her head entirely to face Marik “Ostensive protection means dissuasion, ensure that they know they are not under threat and as long as those specific areas are not engaged, do not provoke”
Next in her line of fire is Santos “As our human officer you will be in sector three, nearby the precinct. They are liable to become most agitated in this area and your presence may serve to calm them. You are not to engage, if deemed necessary the precinct’s materials are considered expendable, do not attempt to stop them”
“Sector four, the exit of town, will be with me to ensure that they have fully left Blackriver and will not attempt to turn back” then she tilts her ears again “Aren, you will gear up with a CCG and remain out of view range, your task will be quick emergency response should the need arise.” she then points her tail at the last three officers “Vess, your task will be to inform the herd and ensure a clear path for the convoy while Nila and Kessa will gather all of our medical supplies and set a staging area out of the convoy’s range. Organize ambulance assistance from Striped Hill and Everrain”
Then, she turns her ears around to focus each one in turn “As any attempt at aggression will end only in negative consequences, and in order to reduce the apparent levels of threat you will be unarmed. The estimated time of arrival is a third of a claw, ready yourselves and be at your post in time. Dismissed.”
“Not sure if I like or I don’t that we had the cold bastard right now” Aren says, as soon as Keya had left the room “Maybe we should move in closer when the convoy gets to sector four?”
“Probably a good idea to be nearby” Santos adds with a sigh “They might take umbrage with her demeanor, hopefully they won’t be set off too hard.”
And with silent signs of agreement all of the officers of Blackriver depart for preparations. The first ones to leave the precinct are the ones in charge of support, the two girls set off early to find someone willing to permit usage of their lawn as a possible impromptu field hospital and a little while later Aren leaves with a heavy CCG.
Slowly, the clock ticks to the appointed claw… And soon enough, Lunek can see in the distance the incoming omen of people. At first a distant line in the horizon, slowly the dark mark on the road coalesces into distinct shapes, the shapes of hundreds of vehicles slowly rolling down the road.
When the first few get close to the initial buildings of the main street, the entire convoy slows down. Their process of preparation is seemingly laborious, each vehicle houses multiple people at a time, smaller cars full to the brim, flatbeds with more people on their cargo space than can safely be contained, even buses conscripted for the effort. They carry with them signs, flags, a multitude of symbols as they dismount their vehicles and start spreading out to fill the street.
They seem to naturally form two distinct yet highly mixed groups, at its most distinctive is the pack of humans who keep a good distance from each other. But they are not alone in this group as takkan, mazic, yotul, zurulian and even drilvar form this central group. But flowing around them, not avoiding their presence but never infringing in their space is the grey mass of venlil, packed tight together, and mixed in there adding color to the monochromatic flux are krakotl, tilfish, sulean, iftali, sivkit and even a seemingly very confused duerten.
And at the very core of the moving group are their vehicles, which gently start rolling forward again as the group starts moving. Lunek simply waits, silently, by the side of the road, his ears attentively swiveling from one side to the other, expression having given way to function. Before the first of the convoy even arrives close he turns to the side, making a pointing sign with his tail. A woman who had been watching from her yard flicks her right ear and runs back inside.
He continues to wait, scanning around at all times for the presence of… Anything. The street is empty of locals when the first visitors start to alight. The convoy is loud, their symbols carry a loudness of colors and their vehicles make as much noise as they can to draw attention, but those who walk seem content in allowing their tools to speak for them, for now. Lunek tries to make sense of the banners and signs, but the messages are disparate as the group- Some speak of injustices against their people, some speak of anger at invaders, some speak of betrayal.
“Fuck off, fireman!” comes the harsh bark of a human, causing Lunek to flinch. But flinch is all he does, he simply starts walking alongside the moving convoy.
The exterminator’s attention is drawn to the details of the few people he can distinguish amongst the mass. Something tickles at his pattern-recognition but he cannot quite ascertain what for a while, until a lightly limping mazic makes her way to the edge of the mass “Want to finish the job?!” she trumpets, her form towering over his.
“I’m just observing, ma’am.” Though the tremor of his voice is noticeable, he remains stoic. But her proximity makes him notice something about her body, marks in her wrists, neck and feet. Though mazic have powerful wrists and knuckles upon which they support the front half of their weight, her left wrist seems completely incapable of it, giving her a limp particular to a three-point walk. “To make sure there’s no impediment on your path” he notices the leathery skin around her left wrist is deeply blackened.
“Oh, ‘no impediment’ is that it? So everyone that lives here is an impediment?!” her voice booms.
“Ma’am” still, he does not yield nor does he break his pace following the convoy “We have not done anything other than inform our people of your presence…” for a half second all he hears is the sound of his own heart “We can’t do anything else.”
Those words, then, sealed his fate. The first shout to echo in his direction was a yotul howling “Yeah you’re useless!” and soon the avalanche came in multiple voices and languages “Can’t do shit!” “You’re just here to hurt people!” “Useless crap!” “Idiot!” and many more.
With every step and twitch the very average exterminator puts all of his focus on just being there. He lets himself cower a little bit, against the barrage it is difficult not to, but he continues to accompany. A few curious coats step out from their houses to watch, but the front of the convoy seems far too focused on the sole exterminator in view to bother anyone else.
A few steps ahead, an older venlil with a cane has moved the closest to the convoy as any watcher has up to now. Seeing her proximity to the increasingly rowdy crowd causes Lunek to speed up, quickly approaching her “Leva-”
But his words are stalled when she puts a paw on his shoulder, she gently puts her head against his for just a second “You’re doing good pup, keep at it” she mutters to him before breaking contact and turning around to walk back inside. He can spy her grandchildren looking on through the door. Lunek looks back at the still-shouting moving convoy, takes a deep breath, and continues to accompany them forward. A small pawful of them, however, seem to have fallen silent.
Once having reached the limit of his assigned zone, however, Lunek stops. He watches the convoy move forward, past the houses, now noisier than before. The initial hollering at him had turned into disjointed screams at some indistinct foe- Though the herd had been noticed of a foe, it was yet unaware of who, or what, said foe was. So for now it howled at the ineptitude of… Someone. And as the last of the convoy passes beyond the imaginary line of his duty, Lunek lets out a deep sigh and allows himself to sit down on the ground.
He stays there for a moment, without thought, simply letting the tension, confusion and fear permeate his body until a gentle paw touches his arm. He doesn’t need to look to identify it, he lets his lover use her strength to prop him up, raising him to his feet “Keina you shouldn’t-”
“Neighbor’s looking over Tiss” his wife wraps her arms and tail around him “I’m not leaving you alone.” she stays like that for a second, before breaking off “Do you need to go after them?”
“No”
Marik stalks through the sidewalk, moving with energy. His speed outpaces the movement of the convoy, his paws twitch to grasp at something that isn’t there and a deep and intense motion makes his short fur stand on end. He had let the convoy’s head move in front of him, simply standing still as he assessed as many as he could in the mass, and now he had begun to move towards the front again.
As he stalked forward he focused his sight on every member of the convoy that seemed of interest. A human whose clothes seemed suspiciously loose, a venlil whose movements were far too stiff, a gojid who kept his claws behind his back. He stared at each like they were his quarry, analyzing every piece of movement they made for threats, and yet aside from the challenge in the human’s gaze he saw no danger arise.
Tenve had closed his shop, so as the convoy moved forward Marik simply continued to follow along, scanning the crowd for threats. But the next point of interest arrives, and he rushes ahead placing himself in front of the only restaurant of the town. Sunbreeze Meals wasn’t a very common sort of restaurant, Blackriver did not have enough visitors for a normal restaurant to be profitable and was small enough most people had their meals at home, it most often served takeout for those farmers who’d spend so long in the field they would return home without the energy to feed themselves.
Sparing a look inside at the only five tables, Marik couldn’t keep a small thought away from his mind. How most who got their meals from Sunbreeze these days did so because they enjoyed the cooking rather than their need of work, ever since the sunspeck population has been brought under control and the maintenance of the fields had become much smaller. He feels the presence long before he can recognize what led him to feel it and turns to stare at a group of six that approach the entrance: Two humans, a tilfish, two gojids and a takkan had broken off from the convoy and approached the restaurant.
He traces his color band over each in turn, and they all bristle at his stare. One of the humans hesitates before continuing to walk inside, and Marik simply remains by the door with his arms crossed, left ear twisted as far back as he could to listen to the inside.
“What have you got here?”
“W-we mostly ha-have ready ma-made meals to go or- or- Or you can look over the menu”
“There’s no need to stutter, y’know”
“So-sorry-”
“Really, after everything y’all are still with this predator crap?”
The chimes on the door echo for the second time in sequence as Marik makes his way inside. The tilfish had started to lean over the counter while the other five had arrayed themselves behind her. They all turn their attention to him as he enters, including the venlil manning the counter. Marik keeps his gaze directly on the tilfish for a few uncomfortable seconds, before looking at the man behind the counter and making a simple sign with his tail, a short vertical bob with the tip and a slow horizontal swipe. It’s meaning simple: >Safe<.
After a few seconds someone else appears from the kitchen. The tall venlil carries a large stack of plastic boxes in his arms, all of them seemingly designed to attach to themselves so as to be carried with ease. He puts them down with a resounding crash on the counter, and opens up his voice with ice “Farmer’s Pots, good meal when you’re working and can’t go home.” With each word the owner of the restaurant and main cook comes closer and closer to the tilfish, until the last “Ten credits each.”
Nobody moves for a couple of seconds, and then one of the humans steps closer and brings a holopad over to the credit reader. There’s a noise indicating payment, and then the owner raises his head and tilts it to focus his favored eye and both of his ears at the man who paid “Now,” he shifts register in his voice and the language he speaks in “fuck off” he finishes.
With no small amount of surprise the group of six retrieve the stack of packaged meals, carefully walking out and back into the convoy. Marik stays behind for a moment “Didn’t know you spoke human”
“Pup’s enamored with their languages. Of course, first greek words he learns is swearing.”
Outside, Marik stalks further ahead to the next point of interest. He moves faster than the convoy, and has time to move in front of it. For a few meters the street is still clear as he arrives to find a group of people standing in front of the Watchful. Standing there were all of its employees, and even all of its regulars, twenty people total standing there as if they were having the most normal day. If not for their raised ears tracking every noise coming from down the street and their swaying tails swinging about like angry beasts.
One of them simply points his tail at the other side of the street as Marik comes closer, and the hunter doesn’t need a second command to understand the meaning. They have this, he has a less practical but just as important duty. He crosses the street quickly before the convoy starts coming closer, and heads towards the park.
As the regulars of the Watchful had feared, it took little time until a large group had broken off from the convoy. With the town on alert about the convoy they had found themselves bereft of prey and now this group had set out to find some, anyone who might be willing, or not, to listen to their grievances. And what is clearly a place designed for people to congregate looked most appetizing.
Marik shadowed the group as they moved through the park, but they were accompanied by nothing but silence. It wasn’t until they ran into the centerpiece of the park that he took initiative, stepping ahead of the group and simply… Standing there a distance away from the tree of many scions, between it and the group.
“What’s so important over there, fireman?” it was a venlil who asked, but his usage of an english word was not lost on Marik.
“A place you will respect” the exterminator has his arms crossed, the one good portion of his gaze set on the man who asked “This is a grave.”
Though the group that now prowled was large, those who heard were taken aback. One such, however, approaches closer. He was a venlil whose fur shifted between a soft, brownish color and a dirty white “A tradition of the tenets right? One of those family trees?” The man would have been distinctive in any other group due to his missing patches of fur around neck, wrists, even portions around his head. But such signs of long term damage were common in the convoy.
Interest. They had shown true interest, or at least one of them had. “No, but similar… The forgotten tree is a grave for the forgotten.” He felt like these people, at least the ones before him, could probably understand the meaning of this place “It is of no tradition. Someone, a long time ago, wanted to honor someone who was gone but whose name was not meant to be remembered. Someone who had disappeared in the system… So they borrowed on another’s tradition, and added a scion to this tree, with something in their memory. Others have done so similarly, until it became… A grave for the forgotten”
“Didn’t think you’d be worried about this kind of place” it’s a human that speaks up this time
“Our duty is to protect this town, what you think-” but Marik’s words are interrupted by that same venlil who had asked before. His demeanor suddenly shifts, his ears perk up and his entire body shifts forward for a moment. He hesitates, for a second everyone’s focus is on him, and then he runs towards the tree.
Marik follows behind, stopping just by the man’s side as he finds himself at the base of the tree. The man makes a direct line to somewhere, something he had found from the distance, as if it had called him. He finds a thick and heavy branch that had been bent down by the weight of its scions and memories, near its base and speaking of a memory left behind long ago is a braid of fur made of three colors, a dirty white, a soft brown and a dark grey, bound by the braids are two beads.
The man raises up a paw, but does not touch it. As if cradling it, he recites the words engraved in one of the beads “I will cross every star to return home” others have come closer to listen to the man’s hoarse voice “There will always be a home for you” he reads of the second one. The names on the beads have been scratched out. The man falls on his knees “S-she kept her promise and… I couldn’t keep mine…”
Marik steps back as he watches two others come closer to comfort the man. He looks as a few others approach with more caution, looking up at the tree with a bit more reverence than they had before. Then, he turns around and starts heading back towards the main street.
Gazing out as the convoy gains a new flux, some leave it as it passes to move towards the park while others leave the park to rejoin the convoy, Marik simply stays there at the side of the street looking as stern as he could. Though the noise of the convoy remains great, here in this portion it seems to die down a little. A thought crosses his mind as he turns an ear as far back as he can, a thought he can’t help but voice “I wonder how many are looking at their own graves…”
As the convoy progresses, Santos simply stands by the front of the precinct, hands in his pockets. He watches the convoy arrive, heart beating fast, constrained hands the only reason he hasn't started shaking quite yet. He starts tapping his right foot as he watches the first few people cross by without noticing what this place is yet, everyone knows where the precinct is, so aside from the words printed on the sign by the entrance there is no other marker of what this building’s purpose might be.
Of course, it is impossible for nobody to notice. The entire convoy seems to stop as soon as a zurulian riding on the shoulders of a human points a claw at the building and says something. A large group breaks away at the command, all of them holding disparate signs and messages. They turn on the building with enough roars that whatever they are attempting to transmit is lost on him.
Santos is thankful his hearing isn’t nearly as good as his coworkers’, as the cacophony is already overwhelming him. He changes stances slightly, taking his hands out of his pockets and crossing his arms. This prompts a small group to turn their looks at him, the focus easily identifiable with the humans in their midst, focus which made the hair in the back of Santos’ neck stand on end. Living in this place had refined his sense of danger, but he didn’t need that to realize what could happen.
It was a group of five that approached, four humans and a venlil. “Didn’t think they’d be letting humans live out here in the boonies” said one of his kin.
Santos just shrugs “Got hired to work here. Honestly, rural folk get a needlessly bad reputation, most of the time they just don’t care as long as you’re not bothering them”
“Really? In my-”
Santos interrupts the man “Cut it out” there are many ways in which humans make themselves obvious, many of which are their eyes. Santos did understand the fear of them and why it was primal, it was not the fear of the eyes but the fear of attention, it was knowing you were under the scrutiny and judgment of another that set off that emotion. It was rarely the eyes that showed this attention for most species, but for humans it was, and the man’s clear gaze on his badge made the entire situation clear to him “Stop beating around the bush and say it already.”
Someone else is who speaks. The tall woman starts not with words, however, but by spitting on Santos’ uniform “You fucking traitor” her voice is both fierce and cold at the same time. A very emotional coldness.
“There we go” he sighs “Just… Move on. We’re not getting anything out of this conversation”
“Why?” It was the venlil in the group that started this time “These people hate you, they hate you for what you are! Why do you work for them?!”
Santos rubs his eyes and sighs “Because someone has to. Change only happens when you make it happen, simple as that”
“Change?!” another one of the humans howls “Do you think those people can change?! You know the truth, those fuckers have never done anything good!”
“You know, if you had read your history books…” Santos stares at the one who had just had their outburst “You’d remember that we once thought the very same about the police” there’s the sound of glass breaking, but he doesn’t reaction “And a lot of us still do”
The human staring him down shifts their gaze slightly at the broken window of the precinct, then back at Santos “A broken window is easy to fix” he shrugs “As I was saying. Same shit.” he crosses his arms again “There’s a role those people play, a role that needs to be played because it’s important. Different name, different problems, still the same shit. Gotta fix this, I’m doing my part” he then stares at the venlil in the group “You do yours. Simple as that.”
“Role?!” the venlil of the group steps closer “What role could they possibly have?! They only exist to hurt people!”
Santos steps back, and raises his eyes a little bit. Of course, the classics had shown themselves in this instance. With as many humans as there are in the crowd there were now quite a few objects in the air, most clearly aimed at the precinct behind him. Though given the failed arc of some of them it was clearly not just the humans indulging in such a tried and true method.
“I used to be a wildlife preserve ranger” Santos then focuses his gaze on the aggravated venlil “This is a frontier town, if you walk in the brushes with shorts you’ll walk out with your ankles numb. The athai out there are rather harmless, but they keep the sunspecks under control.” He takes another step back “Since coming here I’ve been pest control, had to catch an exotic animal set loose, investigated a murder, helped stop a child from taking her own life, stopped large scale fights, helped a dozen people avoid being arrested for self defense and helped break a fucking siege”
Santos cracks his knuckles “There’s roles. Jobs that need done and there is one fucking organization doing it all. That is a problem.” Then, he sighs and takes a few more steps to the side, offering indifference from this point on “There’s nothing I can say that would make you calm down.” he says one final time “Just make sure not to injure yourselves in the process, alright?” His words seemed to be enough to make the small group cease trying to interact, as the convoy had begun moving again. Though the one human who had called him a traitor gets one final parting shot at the precinct “Where the hell did you get an egg in this planet…” Santos says with a raised eyebrow as the projectile impacts the front door.
Keya stands by a large sign, the same one that welcomes you into Blackriver on one side and sees you out at the other, the official limit of the town. Her arms behind her back, her attention directly towards the front of the convoy as they march. Something gains the whole of her attention, the car in the front. Someone draws her focus, a human with a megaphone on top of the car. The man shouts words of encouragement at the people behind him with the megaphone before turning to his holopad, then he bends over downwards to discuss something with the driver.
She simply remains there, waiting for the convoy to pass. But instead of moving on out of the city, here the convoy stops completely. Keya observes as the further end of the convoy starts to slowly compact upon itself, and her ears pick up something “Alright everyone, start getting ready, next town over is more than a claw away, make sure you’ve left nothing behind” the words were not meant for her, nor for anyone too far. They come from the same man she had seen standing on top of the car, but he had now climbed down and was talking with a group of multiple species.
It is clear they have some degree of leadership, though the convoy does not stop cleanly nor does it begin to organize with alacrity they do respond to the group’s organization. So Keya keeps her focus on them as they point, wave and talk between themselves, others and devices. But at least one of them has noticed her attention, a gangly and light-skinned human with fire-red hair, the man that was atop the car. He starts walking in her direction, before turning around for one final set of commands as he walks backwards “And make sure the guys at the back got all the crap! We’re here to be heard, not to trash the city!” he says before turning back again to head towards her. A venlil with pure white fur erupts from inside the car he was riding, quickly dashing to his side as they notice where he was going.
In a few moments both have come up to her, the human looking down at her with the venlil bristles at his side “Saw anything interesting, fireman?”
“What are you doing here?”
“What? Isn’t it obvious?!” it was the venlil that roared a response “You saw all of it! You know what they’ve done to us! What they’ve done to everyone! And you still work for those brahking monsters! It’s like you’re thankful they made you a cripple!”
The human puts a hand on the venlil’s shoulder, calming her demeanor just a little bit “We’re here because honestly, we’re all too tired of being fucking ignored is what. So what the fuck are you gonna do?!”
“I have put the wrong emphasis” Keya says with her lack of tone. She can see the human shiver just a little bit “My task is to ensure the safety of this town. Your convoy is a danger. We have eight field-capable officers, we cannot ensure the safety of the residents against a group like yours. People will take actions for reasons, you have broadcast your reasons clearly. You have chosen this place for a reason which I cannot ascertain.”
She makes sure her ears are trained towards both the human and the venlil, an action which causes the venlil to cower behind her partner “We do not house government agencies. This is a farming town of little note. The local precinct is a simple precinct, we have no regulatory or command authority. The town population is approximately double that of the number of your convoy. We have no individuals of appreciable social or political reach. There is nothing in Blackriver of interest to people attempting to change government policy, nor have there been actions taken here that I can identify as being cause for retaliatory actions within the context of your message.”
“I must ensure this does not happen again and the only way of doing so is minimizing our attractivity as targets. A logical assumption of your choice of quarry would be a town with the presence of politicians, a large city with constant news coverage, cities housing important government agencies or those containing the Regional Firebases”
“So I ask again. What are you doing here?”
The two remain silent for a few seconds, before the human turns around with a mouth noise “Whatever, I don’t need to explain myself to someone that won’t listen. Come on!” he starts to stalk back towards the car, but stops once he notices his venlil companion wasn’t moving.
The snow-white venlil has their focus on Keya, who offers a simple low forward swipe of her tail, a sign to proceed. Still, the venlil seems frozen in place until the human comes back and grabs hold of their paw with a gentle touch. At which point both finally return to the convoy.
Keya remains at the side of the road, watching as the convoy readies itself again to leave. People get back inside cars, they hop on the back of trucks and load themselves into buses. She continues to watch as the convoy takes its time riding out, making their way out of the town.
Once it is finally gone, multiple footsteps sound behind her. When she turns around she meets her officers, having returned from their assigned positions “They have left. I expect your reports of what happened in each sector by the end of your shifts” she states plainly, before looking at Santos “They did not appear to have a specific reason for targeting Blackriver.” The question remains unspoken.
The human officer just shrugs “Sometimes, you don’t know what you’re doing. We’re just a little town, I doubt they even know what exactly they’re angry about.” He looks at the tail end of the convoy as it leaves “Town was probably just a place they felt safe going to.”
“D-do you think we might get more like that” Lunek says, at the back of the group.
“Who knows…” Santos sighs “But if human history applies anywhere here… This is just a sign of worse things to come”
[ [FIRST] [NEXT>]
And thus the omen passes by. Feelings, emotions of all sorts, without a plan or a reason other than just their own rage and distress.
Did any of these even know what they were doing? And how much worse can it be when they do?
submitted by JulianSkies to NatureofPredators [link] [comments]
Season 10 “Days of Fury” - Episode 2 “Visiting Omen”
He had hoped for a boring day. Boring days are good at work, and Santos was already expecting to not have many of them for a while.The first couple of days were boring, as usual- Blackriver is a small town, and the worst that had happened was Nila and Kessa making a few wellness checks after worried calls from neighbors. A couple of people in denial, a few ashamed at their own violent outbursts and a stern warning to Tamm about painting others’ properties without asking first.
This morning, however, began with an all-hands meeting. There were no meeting rooms in the office, so they made do in the general workspace room, they all stood there at the center while Keya looked them over.
“We have received a report from a neighboring city about a convoy of protestors making its way to Blackriver” she describes without tone. At this point nobody bothers interrupting.
“This convoy is comprised of approximately four hundred and seventy eight individuals of multiple species, primarily human and venlil but with operationally relevant representations of the entire spectrum of size and mobility types” her paws are behind her back, her ears focused directly ahead, her eyes centered to keep the entire team on the core of her focus “They have crossed multiple cities already, generally engaging in verbal sparring with any figure of authority, parading signs and banners denouncing all manners of authorities as well as occasionally engaging in physical altercations with officers.”
“They are also known to engage in vandalism. Though primarily aimed at exterminator and police precincts as well as public offices, they have already caused considerable collateral to others they have identified as ‘collaborators’” there’s a single heartbeat of waiting for breath before she continues “They have, however, not shown to be an incredibly organized group or one with a clear goal and objective. The convoy appears to contain only extremely emotionally charged people with no clear overarching goal.”
“We are incapable of dealing with the situation should they turn aggressive, as such we will be simply maintaining watch and relocating the populace should they become a problem.” Then, she picks up her holopad and passes it to Lunek beside her “They can only follow one path with the entire convoy, the central street, therefore I have divided it into four sectors. One of each will be assigned to a sector.”
First her ears turn to the first target “Lunek, sector one at the entrance. As the most approachable member of the precinct your task is to give an initial image of harmlessness. Do not engage first, do not take initiative against them. Ensure the members of the herd in the area are warned of their approach. If they become aggressive, retreat and focus on the escape of the herd.”
She tilts her head a little bit, turning her ears the other way “Marik, sector two. Mostly the commercial area, your task is ostensive protection to lower the chances of them initiating aggression. Whereas protection of the herd is first priority your second priority is ensuring Tenve’s Hardware Store as well as Sunbreeze Meals and Watchful Café remain capable of providing anyone whose residences become damaged.” suddenly, she turns her head entirely to face Marik “Ostensive protection means dissuasion, ensure that they know they are not under threat and as long as those specific areas are not engaged, do not provoke”
Next in her line of fire is Santos “As our human officer you will be in sector three, nearby the precinct. They are liable to become most agitated in this area and your presence may serve to calm them. You are not to engage, if deemed necessary the precinct’s materials are considered expendable, do not attempt to stop them”
“Sector four, the exit of town, will be with me to ensure that they have fully left Blackriver and will not attempt to turn back” then she tilts her ears again “Aren, you will gear up with a CCG and remain out of view range, your task will be quick emergency response should the need arise.” she then points her tail at the last three officers “Vess, your task will be to inform the herd and ensure a clear path for the convoy while Nila and Kessa will gather all of our medical supplies and set a staging area out of the convoy’s range. Organize ambulance assistance from Striped Hill and Everrain”
Then, she turns her ears around to focus each one in turn “As any attempt at aggression will end only in negative consequences, and in order to reduce the apparent levels of threat you will be unarmed. The estimated time of arrival is a third of a claw, ready yourselves and be at your post in time. Dismissed.”
“Not sure if I like or I don’t that we had the cold bastard right now” Aren says, as soon as Keya had left the room “Maybe we should move in closer when the convoy gets to sector four?”
“Probably a good idea to be nearby” Santos adds with a sigh “They might take umbrage with her demeanor, hopefully they won’t be set off too hard.”
And with silent signs of agreement all of the officers of Blackriver depart for preparations. The first ones to leave the precinct are the ones in charge of support, the two girls set off early to find someone willing to permit usage of their lawn as a possible impromptu field hospital and a little while later Aren leaves with a heavy CCG.
Slowly, the clock ticks to the appointed claw… And soon enough, Lunek can see in the distance the incoming omen of people. At first a distant line in the horizon, slowly the dark mark on the road coalesces into distinct shapes, the shapes of hundreds of vehicles slowly rolling down the road.
When the first few get close to the initial buildings of the main street, the entire convoy slows down. Their process of preparation is seemingly laborious, each vehicle houses multiple people at a time, smaller cars full to the brim, flatbeds with more people on their cargo space than can safely be contained, even buses conscripted for the effort. They carry with them signs, flags, a multitude of symbols as they dismount their vehicles and start spreading out to fill the street.
They seem to naturally form two distinct yet highly mixed groups, at its most distinctive is the pack of humans who keep a good distance from each other. But they are not alone in this group as takkan, mazic, yotul, zurulian and even drilvar form this central group. But flowing around them, not avoiding their presence but never infringing in their space is the grey mass of venlil, packed tight together, and mixed in there adding color to the monochromatic flux are krakotl, tilfish, sulean, iftali, sivkit and even a seemingly very confused duerten.
And at the very core of the moving group are their vehicles, which gently start rolling forward again as the group starts moving. Lunek simply waits, silently, by the side of the road, his ears attentively swiveling from one side to the other, expression having given way to function. Before the first of the convoy even arrives close he turns to the side, making a pointing sign with his tail. A woman who had been watching from her yard flicks her right ear and runs back inside.
He continues to wait, scanning around at all times for the presence of… Anything. The street is empty of locals when the first visitors start to alight. The convoy is loud, their symbols carry a loudness of colors and their vehicles make as much noise as they can to draw attention, but those who walk seem content in allowing their tools to speak for them, for now. Lunek tries to make sense of the banners and signs, but the messages are disparate as the group- Some speak of injustices against their people, some speak of anger at invaders, some speak of betrayal.
“Fuck off, fireman!” comes the harsh bark of a human, causing Lunek to flinch. But flinch is all he does, he simply starts walking alongside the moving convoy.
The exterminator’s attention is drawn to the details of the few people he can distinguish amongst the mass. Something tickles at his pattern-recognition but he cannot quite ascertain what for a while, until a lightly limping mazic makes her way to the edge of the mass “Want to finish the job?!” she trumpets, her form towering over his.
“I’m just observing, ma’am.” Though the tremor of his voice is noticeable, he remains stoic. But her proximity makes him notice something about her body, marks in her wrists, neck and feet. Though mazic have powerful wrists and knuckles upon which they support the front half of their weight, her left wrist seems completely incapable of it, giving her a limp particular to a three-point walk. “To make sure there’s no impediment on your path” he notices the leathery skin around her left wrist is deeply blackened.
“Oh, ‘no impediment’ is that it? So everyone that lives here is an impediment?!” her voice booms.
“Ma’am” still, he does not yield nor does he break his pace following the convoy “We have not done anything other than inform our people of your presence…” for a half second all he hears is the sound of his own heart “We can’t do anything else.”
Those words, then, sealed his fate. The first shout to echo in his direction was a yotul howling “Yeah you’re useless!” and soon the avalanche came in multiple voices and languages “Can’t do shit!” “You’re just here to hurt people!” “Useless crap!” “Idiot!” and many more.
With every step and twitch the very average exterminator puts all of his focus on just being there. He lets himself cower a little bit, against the barrage it is difficult not to, but he continues to accompany. A few curious coats step out from their houses to watch, but the front of the convoy seems far too focused on the sole exterminator in view to bother anyone else.
A few steps ahead, an older venlil with a cane has moved the closest to the convoy as any watcher has up to now. Seeing her proximity to the increasingly rowdy crowd causes Lunek to speed up, quickly approaching her “Leva-”
But his words are stalled when she puts a paw on his shoulder, she gently puts her head against his for just a second “You’re doing good pup, keep at it” she mutters to him before breaking contact and turning around to walk back inside. He can spy her grandchildren looking on through the door. Lunek looks back at the still-shouting moving convoy, takes a deep breath, and continues to accompany them forward. A small pawful of them, however, seem to have fallen silent.
Once having reached the limit of his assigned zone, however, Lunek stops. He watches the convoy move forward, past the houses, now noisier than before. The initial hollering at him had turned into disjointed screams at some indistinct foe- Though the herd had been noticed of a foe, it was yet unaware of who, or what, said foe was. So for now it howled at the ineptitude of… Someone. And as the last of the convoy passes beyond the imaginary line of his duty, Lunek lets out a deep sigh and allows himself to sit down on the ground.
He stays there for a moment, without thought, simply letting the tension, confusion and fear permeate his body until a gentle paw touches his arm. He doesn’t need to look to identify it, he lets his lover use her strength to prop him up, raising him to his feet “Keina you shouldn’t-”
“Neighbor’s looking over Tiss” his wife wraps her arms and tail around him “I’m not leaving you alone.” she stays like that for a second, before breaking off “Do you need to go after them?”
“No”
Marik stalks through the sidewalk, moving with energy. His speed outpaces the movement of the convoy, his paws twitch to grasp at something that isn’t there and a deep and intense motion makes his short fur stand on end. He had let the convoy’s head move in front of him, simply standing still as he assessed as many as he could in the mass, and now he had begun to move towards the front again.
As he stalked forward he focused his sight on every member of the convoy that seemed of interest. A human whose clothes seemed suspiciously loose, a venlil whose movements were far too stiff, a gojid who kept his claws behind his back. He stared at each like they were his quarry, analyzing every piece of movement they made for threats, and yet aside from the challenge in the human’s gaze he saw no danger arise.
Tenve had closed his shop, so as the convoy moved forward Marik simply continued to follow along, scanning the crowd for threats. But the next point of interest arrives, and he rushes ahead placing himself in front of the only restaurant of the town. Sunbreeze Meals wasn’t a very common sort of restaurant, Blackriver did not have enough visitors for a normal restaurant to be profitable and was small enough most people had their meals at home, it most often served takeout for those farmers who’d spend so long in the field they would return home without the energy to feed themselves.
Sparing a look inside at the only five tables, Marik couldn’t keep a small thought away from his mind. How most who got their meals from Sunbreeze these days did so because they enjoyed the cooking rather than their need of work, ever since the sunspeck population has been brought under control and the maintenance of the fields had become much smaller. He feels the presence long before he can recognize what led him to feel it and turns to stare at a group of six that approach the entrance: Two humans, a tilfish, two gojids and a takkan had broken off from the convoy and approached the restaurant.
He traces his color band over each in turn, and they all bristle at his stare. One of the humans hesitates before continuing to walk inside, and Marik simply remains by the door with his arms crossed, left ear twisted as far back as he could to listen to the inside.
“What have you got here?”
“W-we mostly ha-have ready ma-made meals to go or- or- Or you can look over the menu”
“There’s no need to stutter, y’know”
“So-sorry-”
“Really, after everything y’all are still with this predator crap?”
The chimes on the door echo for the second time in sequence as Marik makes his way inside. The tilfish had started to lean over the counter while the other five had arrayed themselves behind her. They all turn their attention to him as he enters, including the venlil manning the counter. Marik keeps his gaze directly on the tilfish for a few uncomfortable seconds, before looking at the man behind the counter and making a simple sign with his tail, a short vertical bob with the tip and a slow horizontal swipe. It’s meaning simple: >Safe<.
After a few seconds someone else appears from the kitchen. The tall venlil carries a large stack of plastic boxes in his arms, all of them seemingly designed to attach to themselves so as to be carried with ease. He puts them down with a resounding crash on the counter, and opens up his voice with ice “Farmer’s Pots, good meal when you’re working and can’t go home.” With each word the owner of the restaurant and main cook comes closer and closer to the tilfish, until the last “Ten credits each.”
Nobody moves for a couple of seconds, and then one of the humans steps closer and brings a holopad over to the credit reader. There’s a noise indicating payment, and then the owner raises his head and tilts it to focus his favored eye and both of his ears at the man who paid “Now,” he shifts register in his voice and the language he speaks in “fuck off” he finishes.
With no small amount of surprise the group of six retrieve the stack of packaged meals, carefully walking out and back into the convoy. Marik stays behind for a moment “Didn’t know you spoke human”
“Pup’s enamored with their languages. Of course, first greek words he learns is swearing.”
Outside, Marik stalks further ahead to the next point of interest. He moves faster than the convoy, and has time to move in front of it. For a few meters the street is still clear as he arrives to find a group of people standing in front of the Watchful. Standing there were all of its employees, and even all of its regulars, twenty people total standing there as if they were having the most normal day. If not for their raised ears tracking every noise coming from down the street and their swaying tails swinging about like angry beasts.
One of them simply points his tail at the other side of the street as Marik comes closer, and the hunter doesn’t need a second command to understand the meaning. They have this, he has a less practical but just as important duty. He crosses the street quickly before the convoy starts coming closer, and heads towards the park.
As the regulars of the Watchful had feared, it took little time until a large group had broken off from the convoy. With the town on alert about the convoy they had found themselves bereft of prey and now this group had set out to find some, anyone who might be willing, or not, to listen to their grievances. And what is clearly a place designed for people to congregate looked most appetizing.
Marik shadowed the group as they moved through the park, but they were accompanied by nothing but silence. It wasn’t until they ran into the centerpiece of the park that he took initiative, stepping ahead of the group and simply… Standing there a distance away from the tree of many scions, between it and the group.
“What’s so important over there, fireman?” it was a venlil who asked, but his usage of an english word was not lost on Marik.
“A place you will respect” the exterminator has his arms crossed, the one good portion of his gaze set on the man who asked “This is a grave.”
Though the group that now prowled was large, those who heard were taken aback. One such, however, approaches closer. He was a venlil whose fur shifted between a soft, brownish color and a dirty white “A tradition of the tenets right? One of those family trees?” The man would have been distinctive in any other group due to his missing patches of fur around neck, wrists, even portions around his head. But such signs of long term damage were common in the convoy.
Interest. They had shown true interest, or at least one of them had. “No, but similar… The forgotten tree is a grave for the forgotten.” He felt like these people, at least the ones before him, could probably understand the meaning of this place “It is of no tradition. Someone, a long time ago, wanted to honor someone who was gone but whose name was not meant to be remembered. Someone who had disappeared in the system… So they borrowed on another’s tradition, and added a scion to this tree, with something in their memory. Others have done so similarly, until it became… A grave for the forgotten”
“Didn’t think you’d be worried about this kind of place” it’s a human that speaks up this time
“Our duty is to protect this town, what you think-” but Marik’s words are interrupted by that same venlil who had asked before. His demeanor suddenly shifts, his ears perk up and his entire body shifts forward for a moment. He hesitates, for a second everyone’s focus is on him, and then he runs towards the tree.
Marik follows behind, stopping just by the man’s side as he finds himself at the base of the tree. The man makes a direct line to somewhere, something he had found from the distance, as if it had called him. He finds a thick and heavy branch that had been bent down by the weight of its scions and memories, near its base and speaking of a memory left behind long ago is a braid of fur made of three colors, a dirty white, a soft brown and a dark grey, bound by the braids are two beads.
The man raises up a paw, but does not touch it. As if cradling it, he recites the words engraved in one of the beads “I will cross every star to return home” others have come closer to listen to the man’s hoarse voice “There will always be a home for you” he reads of the second one. The names on the beads have been scratched out. The man falls on his knees “S-she kept her promise and… I couldn’t keep mine…”
Marik steps back as he watches two others come closer to comfort the man. He looks as a few others approach with more caution, looking up at the tree with a bit more reverence than they had before. Then, he turns around and starts heading back towards the main street.
Gazing out as the convoy gains a new flux, some leave it as it passes to move towards the park while others leave the park to rejoin the convoy, Marik simply stays there at the side of the street looking as stern as he could. Though the noise of the convoy remains great, here in this portion it seems to die down a little. A thought crosses his mind as he turns an ear as far back as he can, a thought he can’t help but voice “I wonder how many are looking at their own graves…”
As the convoy progresses, Santos simply stands by the front of the precinct, hands in his pockets. He watches the convoy arrive, heart beating fast, constrained hands the only reason he hasn't started shaking quite yet. He starts tapping his right foot as he watches the first few people cross by without noticing what this place is yet, everyone knows where the precinct is, so aside from the words printed on the sign by the entrance there is no other marker of what this building’s purpose might be.
Of course, it is impossible for nobody to notice. The entire convoy seems to stop as soon as a zurulian riding on the shoulders of a human points a claw at the building and says something. A large group breaks away at the command, all of them holding disparate signs and messages. They turn on the building with enough roars that whatever they are attempting to transmit is lost on him.
Santos is thankful his hearing isn’t nearly as good as his coworkers’, as the cacophony is already overwhelming him. He changes stances slightly, taking his hands out of his pockets and crossing his arms. This prompts a small group to turn their looks at him, the focus easily identifiable with the humans in their midst, focus which made the hair in the back of Santos’ neck stand on end. Living in this place had refined his sense of danger, but he didn’t need that to realize what could happen.
It was a group of five that approached, four humans and a venlil. “Didn’t think they’d be letting humans live out here in the boonies” said one of his kin.
Santos just shrugs “Got hired to work here. Honestly, rural folk get a needlessly bad reputation, most of the time they just don’t care as long as you’re not bothering them”
“Really? In my-”
Santos interrupts the man “Cut it out” there are many ways in which humans make themselves obvious, many of which are their eyes. Santos did understand the fear of them and why it was primal, it was not the fear of the eyes but the fear of attention, it was knowing you were under the scrutiny and judgment of another that set off that emotion. It was rarely the eyes that showed this attention for most species, but for humans it was, and the man’s clear gaze on his badge made the entire situation clear to him “Stop beating around the bush and say it already.”
Someone else is who speaks. The tall woman starts not with words, however, but by spitting on Santos’ uniform “You fucking traitor” her voice is both fierce and cold at the same time. A very emotional coldness.
“There we go” he sighs “Just… Move on. We’re not getting anything out of this conversation”
“Why?” It was the venlil in the group that started this time “These people hate you, they hate you for what you are! Why do you work for them?!”
Santos rubs his eyes and sighs “Because someone has to. Change only happens when you make it happen, simple as that”
“Change?!” another one of the humans howls “Do you think those people can change?! You know the truth, those fuckers have never done anything good!”
“You know, if you had read your history books…” Santos stares at the one who had just had their outburst “You’d remember that we once thought the very same about the police” there’s the sound of glass breaking, but he doesn’t reaction “And a lot of us still do”
The human staring him down shifts their gaze slightly at the broken window of the precinct, then back at Santos “A broken window is easy to fix” he shrugs “As I was saying. Same shit.” he crosses his arms again “There’s a role those people play, a role that needs to be played because it’s important. Different name, different problems, still the same shit. Gotta fix this, I’m doing my part” he then stares at the venlil in the group “You do yours. Simple as that.”
“Role?!” the venlil of the group steps closer “What role could they possibly have?! They only exist to hurt people!”
Santos steps back, and raises his eyes a little bit. Of course, the classics had shown themselves in this instance. With as many humans as there are in the crowd there were now quite a few objects in the air, most clearly aimed at the precinct behind him. Though given the failed arc of some of them it was clearly not just the humans indulging in such a tried and true method.
“I used to be a wildlife preserve ranger” Santos then focuses his gaze on the aggravated venlil “This is a frontier town, if you walk in the brushes with shorts you’ll walk out with your ankles numb. The athai out there are rather harmless, but they keep the sunspecks under control.” He takes another step back “Since coming here I’ve been pest control, had to catch an exotic animal set loose, investigated a murder, helped stop a child from taking her own life, stopped large scale fights, helped a dozen people avoid being arrested for self defense and helped break a fucking siege”
Santos cracks his knuckles “There’s roles. Jobs that need done and there is one fucking organization doing it all. That is a problem.” Then, he sighs and takes a few more steps to the side, offering indifference from this point on “There’s nothing I can say that would make you calm down.” he says one final time “Just make sure not to injure yourselves in the process, alright?” His words seemed to be enough to make the small group cease trying to interact, as the convoy had begun moving again. Though the one human who had called him a traitor gets one final parting shot at the precinct “Where the hell did you get an egg in this planet…” Santos says with a raised eyebrow as the projectile impacts the front door.
Keya stands by a large sign, the same one that welcomes you into Blackriver on one side and sees you out at the other, the official limit of the town. Her arms behind her back, her attention directly towards the front of the convoy as they march. Something gains the whole of her attention, the car in the front. Someone draws her focus, a human with a megaphone on top of the car. The man shouts words of encouragement at the people behind him with the megaphone before turning to his holopad, then he bends over downwards to discuss something with the driver.
She simply remains there, waiting for the convoy to pass. But instead of moving on out of the city, here the convoy stops completely. Keya observes as the further end of the convoy starts to slowly compact upon itself, and her ears pick up something “Alright everyone, start getting ready, next town over is more than a claw away, make sure you’ve left nothing behind” the words were not meant for her, nor for anyone too far. They come from the same man she had seen standing on top of the car, but he had now climbed down and was talking with a group of multiple species.
It is clear they have some degree of leadership, though the convoy does not stop cleanly nor does it begin to organize with alacrity they do respond to the group’s organization. So Keya keeps her focus on them as they point, wave and talk between themselves, others and devices. But at least one of them has noticed her attention, a gangly and light-skinned human with fire-red hair, the man that was atop the car. He starts walking in her direction, before turning around for one final set of commands as he walks backwards “And make sure the guys at the back got all the crap! We’re here to be heard, not to trash the city!” he says before turning back again to head towards her. A venlil with pure white fur erupts from inside the car he was riding, quickly dashing to his side as they notice where he was going.
In a few moments both have come up to her, the human looking down at her with the venlil bristles at his side “Saw anything interesting, fireman?”
“What are you doing here?”
“What? Isn’t it obvious?!” it was the venlil that roared a response “You saw all of it! You know what they’ve done to us! What they’ve done to everyone! And you still work for those brahking monsters! It’s like you’re thankful they made you a cripple!”
The human puts a hand on the venlil’s shoulder, calming her demeanor just a little bit “We’re here because honestly, we’re all too tired of being fucking ignored is what. So what the fuck are you gonna do?!”
“I have put the wrong emphasis” Keya says with her lack of tone. She can see the human shiver just a little bit “My task is to ensure the safety of this town. Your convoy is a danger. We have eight field-capable officers, we cannot ensure the safety of the residents against a group like yours. People will take actions for reasons, you have broadcast your reasons clearly. You have chosen this place for a reason which I cannot ascertain.”
She makes sure her ears are trained towards both the human and the venlil, an action which causes the venlil to cower behind her partner “We do not house government agencies. This is a farming town of little note. The local precinct is a simple precinct, we have no regulatory or command authority. The town population is approximately double that of the number of your convoy. We have no individuals of appreciable social or political reach. There is nothing in Blackriver of interest to people attempting to change government policy, nor have there been actions taken here that I can identify as being cause for retaliatory actions within the context of your message.”
“I must ensure this does not happen again and the only way of doing so is minimizing our attractivity as targets. A logical assumption of your choice of quarry would be a town with the presence of politicians, a large city with constant news coverage, cities housing important government agencies or those containing the Regional Firebases”
“So I ask again. What are you doing here?”
The two remain silent for a few seconds, before the human turns around with a mouth noise “Whatever, I don’t need to explain myself to someone that won’t listen. Come on!” he starts to stalk back towards the car, but stops once he notices his venlil companion wasn’t moving.
The snow-white venlil has their focus on Keya, who offers a simple low forward swipe of her tail, a sign to proceed. Still, the venlil seems frozen in place until the human comes back and grabs hold of their paw with a gentle touch. At which point both finally return to the convoy.
Keya remains at the side of the road, watching as the convoy readies itself again to leave. People get back inside cars, they hop on the back of trucks and load themselves into buses. She continues to watch as the convoy takes its time riding out, making their way out of the town.
Once it is finally gone, multiple footsteps sound behind her. When she turns around she meets her officers, having returned from their assigned positions “They have left. I expect your reports of what happened in each sector by the end of your shifts” she states plainly, before looking at Santos “They did not appear to have a specific reason for targeting Blackriver.” The question remains unspoken.
The human officer just shrugs “Sometimes, you don’t know what you’re doing. We’re just a little town, I doubt they even know what exactly they’re angry about.” He looks at the tail end of the convoy as it leaves “Town was probably just a place they felt safe going to.”
“D-do you think we might get more like that” Lunek says, at the back of the group.
“Who knows…” Santos sighs “But if human history applies anywhere here… This is just a sign of worse things to come”
And thus the omen passes by. Feelings, emotions of all sorts, without a plan or a reason other than just their own rage and distress.
Did any of these even know what they were doing? And how much worse can it be when they do?
2024.05.18 21:04 windkirby Animal Crossing Pocket Camp v5.6.0b Update
 | https://preview.redd.it/rt5g4izve81d1.png?width=150&format=png&auto=webp&s=e92e4177a6720fb59c74fff55aa90e86e208a9db submitted by windkirby to ACPocketCamp [link] [comments] Howdy, messy roommates. If you felt a bit tickled-pink-to-death by April’s roseate flurry of events, this year’s May just may have the cure with a foray into the airborne, outdoorsy, and adventurous. Thanks as always to Miranda, Bassieeee, and Ray for help datamining. We’ve got our airships, our kites, and our handheld birds, so let’s get our flight gear in check and take off Twitter preview image for May 2024 in Pocket Camp
https://preview.redd.it/2ns91p0jg81d1.png?width=640&format=png&auto=webp&s=d9a23ed4287b5cea0847f5eb253b2dacce521941
https://preview.redd.it/0doh4q4lf81d1.png?width=1024&format=png&auto=webp&s=5511a2f38449064fe8ac13c4e11c2cf2f3e3f54e
https://preview.redd.it/p82asoutf81d1.png?width=512&format=png&auto=webp&s=3975b19f113bf3402ee437050f99fa8cc67de3c1
Tip screens for Twiggy's chirpy cookie, the Bright Bird Outfit Collection, and the Birdy Wall & Floor Collection
https://preview.redd.it/eh8pjr9bg81d1.png?width=512&format=png&auto=webp&s=6f383be223eb9a7006b97e57354772cec59bf861
And that’s all of May’s merriments! Our fellow dataminer Koopavocelot has also spotted a noteworthy notice that may be coming this month but no info yet on its contents… Hopefully it’s not some sort of end-of-times apocalyptic alert with the last of the villagers likely coming out this month. Er… right? As for June, we’ll probably get the Twitter preview in only a week’s time. June is often themed around seasonal rain or weddings as they’re what the month is known for in Japan, and given that we just had a windy-themed event this month, I’d expect more of the latter matrimania for next month’s events. But who knows? We might get some of both in a dewy bridal shower! (Or maybe something completely different.) I’ll aim to have that datamine posted for you fine folks when the update drops ASAP. Until then, thanks for reading, and remember, even if a bird is super-hunkalicious, that doesn’t make it okay to keep him as a pet! —Woodsy |
2024.05.18 18:59 djavulensfitta Short story written by Joost (Brüders auf Berlin)
Hi, I know some of you have been interested in Joost’s written stuff, so this is one of them. It’s a short story that Joost wrote for Boekenweek voor Jongeren (Book Week for Young People) in 2019. There’s more info about it here (in Dutch) https://www.vice.com/nl/article/qvgzpv/joost-klein-schreef-een-kort-verhaal-over-een-wilde-nacht-in-berlijn and there was also this promo video for it https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wx7wxnpxps0. It's been translated from Dutch - maybe not the most perfect translation but it's readable. Original in Dutch here. Enjoy
"How come he suddenly has cash?" I looked at Gurb, but he avoided my gaze. Louis never had money and yet he was buying another round. Meanwhile, a Moby song was playing and nothing made sense. "If he has money for drinks, he can surely pay me back, right?"
Just a few hours ago, I was alone in Berlin. Now, ten hours later, I'm standing in some obscure techno club with my best friends. Loud rock music with drunken shouting. "Hey, Miss Murder, can I make beauty stay if I take my life?" I woke up that day with a mild hangover from the lonely yet people-filled night before. Perfect conditions for a 20-year-old dropout.
The Hard Rock Café was the most beautifully ugly place in Berlin. Gurb had driven for seven hours straight in his mother's car, but we didn't notice. An iconic black Mini Cooper. Your body leads your mind, the beat never stops, and you can conquer the world. Louis threw in another crazy dance move. We were happy.
"Do you want another drink, brother?" Gurb asked me, half shouting. An evening filled with rhetorical questions. He saw me dancing and already knew the answer.
Gurb always had money. Louis, on the other hand, never did. Louis was also the youngest of us three. He had just turned 18. I wouldn't call him a cunning fox. More like a jack-of-all-trades. Like the time he made a lot of money on a Wadden Island with a group of boys. They sold large blocks of hash.
"Crazy dude!" I shouted at him. He yelled something back.
"Do you remember back then?" Louis said.
"Back then? Back then? Yeah man, of course!" I had no idea what he meant. "Do you mean the party?"
"Do you mean the party, he says! This guy. When I look at you like this, it makes me happy. The exact same kid is here letting loose just like back in high school!"
We knew each other from secondary school. He joined when I was in the second grade. He was very intelligent. Too young, too much knowledge of the world. His mother is from Brazil. We often went to his mother's place to play on the Playstation Louis and I had bought together.
I lived everywhere at that time. In the crisis shelter where I stayed for a while, for example, I wasn't allowed to have a Playstation. So we set it up in an accessible place, near school. It was always fun with Louis. Going together to the Apple Store. Taking all kinds of photos with all the webcams, posting them on Hyves, and then leaving. Louis always knew how to cheer me up.
"Aaaaaaaaaa!" There was Gurb with five drinks in his hands. Gurb was wearing a blue checkered shirt. Two buttons undone. Hair slicked back. "You look good, brother!"
"You look fresh too! We all look fresh!" Gurb said enthusiastically. Louis was wearing a completely white outfit. We quickly bought this before going out. He also bleached his hair.
"You look like the Brazilian cousin of James Dean in these clothes," I said. Louis laughed. "Let me take a picture."
Suddenly, the DJ switched to some kind of techno. "Ah, here Berlin briefly takes off its mask." I was fine with it all. Louis was talking to a lady.
Voluptuous breasts, I thought to myself. He gave her one of his two drinks.
"He's with a girl and he's thinking with his dick," I said to Gurb. "Let him be, tonight Berlin is ours!"
The bass kept pounding. "I simply don't have the patience for the club," I said to Gurb. He looked surprised. Like a sweet dog, tilting his head. "I'm just waiting for tomorrow. Can't do my thing here. Don't have patience for the already known. I want adventure and I want it now!"
Gurb started laughing. "Patience is a virtue." Yes. Patience is all well and good, but I think it's a waste of my time. Gurb grabbed my shoulder.
"I think it's time for another beer."
Louis and I were walking through Leeuwarden a year ago when suddenly a red Ford Ka stopped in front of us. It was Gurb, casually driving around the city. He invited us into his car. We hopped in. Since that afternoon, the three of us were together. A few months later, Louis got a tattoo on his ribs in honor of our friendship. It was the name of our group chat. Braddar Force Indigo.
There were also days when Gurb would take me for a drive around Friesland. He reminded me how beautiful Friesland is. The world doesn't spin there. The newspapers I threw away in the Stiens forest in 2011 could still be lying in the same spot, so to speak.
Just before midnight, I found myself in line for the restroom. My eyes fell on a pair of striking shoes. Cigarette smoke invaded my nose for the fourth time. "Müssen Sie eine Zigarette haben?" a female voice spoke to me. I felt like Tom Hanks in the final scene of Angels & Demons, where the new pope first steps onto the balcony. The curtains opened. There I was, witnessing an important moment in history. I was just told how I was sent by God, but my ears didn't want to hear any of it. At least that's how I felt. My mouth was empty. I had no words left. That's when I knew for sure. Berlin might really be as crazy as literally everyone says.
Dark blond, silky hair. Was this real beauty then? She wouldn't look 40, but I think she was. A true woman. Beautiful in all her elegance. I always joked about being interested in older women, but tonight one stood in front of me. "I don't smoke," I said to her.
Someone tapped me. "Please, just go to the toilet!" He was right. I hadn't peed in a while either. My urine was cloudy. "Glomerulonephritis," I said to myself on the toilet. This is an unusual condition. It's an inflammation in the kidneys, I thought I remembered. They should never have given me access to Google.
The evening progressed, and Louis kept buying rounds. "But seriously now. How does Louis suddenly have all that money for drinks?" I asked Gurb. He was outside smoking with a group of Swiss girls. I had strategically positioned myself so that I could always leave the crime scene if necessary.
"You shouldn't ask me," said Gurb. He was laughing with the temporary girlfriend group of Louis. Gurb has a beard. A lot of chicks like that. I get it too.
As much as I enjoyed Louis and Gurb being here for me, something didn't sit right with me. It couldn't just be about the money. "What's up with him?" I heard one of the Swiss girls say to Gurb.
Those kinds of questions really tire me out. "Not much, with you?" I replied.
They all started laughing. "That's not what she meant, brother," said Gurb.
"I couldn't care less whether she meant it or not. Send that brace-face back to Switzerland. Don't drive me crazy, alright!"
Actually, I hadn't drunk that much that evening. "Two vodka Sprites, please!" It's rare for me to get just one drink. "I always get two drinks, then you have to wait shorter for the third one!" Maybe the alcohol was affecting me more than I wanted to admit. Oh well, it was still the three of us against the world.
"Nice shoes, are those Prada?" I asked a random girl at the bar.
"No, these are fake. Why would I buy real ones for 600 dollars if I could just buy these for 20?"
"..."
I'm not very good at that. Talking. To women.
Louis and Gurb were in the smoking area now. It was less blue than the dance floor itself. My clothes already stank, so a visit to the smoking area couldn't hurt. "These people are so underground!" Gurb shouted. Louis was filming him with his phone. "These people..." There was a brief pause. As if Gurb forgot the only line he had. "...so underground!" All three of us burst into laughter. The alcohol flowed through our veins as if it came from the purest mountains. People seemed doubled and the room was full. We had been in the same club in Berlin for several hours.
"Leonardo! What are you hiding from the big boss?" I sometimes called Louis ‘DiCaprio.’ "You a rich guy, now?" I said, with an accent as if I were from the Bronx.
Louis started laughing. "Eh, you know nothing. Bullshit talk."
I had to laugh too. What was I even worried about? Friends are friends, with or without money. That shouldn't matter. Louis probably just worked for that money. Maybe it wasn't as bad as I thought. Maybe he just had enough to buy rounds. But what if my gut feeling was right? That feeling was never wrong. Except for that one time at the Holland Casino in Groningen. Even the best of us have slip-ups. I was just getting worked up again. When it comes down to it, Louis is one of the sweetest guys I know. I had to let it go. After all, it's still Louis.
"I think I'm going to have sex soon, man," Louis said.
"With who?" I asked immediately.
"That one girl."
"Which one?"
"The one with the boobs."
"Oh, her. Just be careful."
"What kind of reaction is that?" Louis asked indignantly.
I'd only had four drinks, but I was acting like a mess. Louis was right. I didn't understand myself. Where was my head at? I'm here in Berlin, supposed to be having the time of my life, but here I am feeling lonely and sad again. Joost once again couldn't control his emotions.
"Sorry," I suddenly said to Louis. "Sorry for my behavior. Been acting dumb towards you all night. It's unnecessary." Sometimes I have that. Mood swings. "Know that crime is never the solution. We've talked about this so many times. Yes, it's tempting and sometimes easy money. I sometimes find it amusing too, but it's always hypothetical. Ask me for help. I can help you, even with illegal things. I'll always have your back." The dancing was kind of over.
The words I had just placed on Louis's plate came from my heart. My Frisian, irregular boys' heart.
Crying in the club. I had never seen myself like that. Crying, yes. In the club, no. I never understood the taboo around crying. Or emotions in general. I saw myself in the mirror. They weren't tears of joy. They weren't tears of sadness either. It was me letting everything go. All the emotions I had ever felt. The emotions I felt between my brother and sister and myself because they wanted to take on a parental role over me, but I was in puberty, so I pushed them away. The emotions I felt when my old neighbors were supposed to take care of my dog, but didn't tell me that he was bitten by one of their dogs. They didn't have money for the surgery, they later told me. They were ashamed of their lack of money. My dog died from this injury. Even the emotions that were all jumping at once during the retake for my swimming diploma A, I let go of.
No emotions. Just for a moment, not feeling anything. Is that too much to ask for?
"You still don’t smoke?"
It had to be the voice of the woman with the cigarettes. I looked over my shoulder through the mirror. It was her. The one with dark blond, silky hair.
"Not to be rude, but this is the men’s room," I said. She took a step closer and kissed me on my lips. It tasted like more. We started kissing. It had been a while since I had had female contact at this level. It probably didn't look good and it didn't feel good either. She started kissing my neck. Slowly, I noticed the pressure in the erectile tissues of my penis starting to increase. "I really don't have time for this!" I thought to myself. The woman with the cigarettes started to slowly sink down until she was on her knees. I didn't want this. Not now, not like this. She unraveled my penis from my Polo Ralph Lauren underwear. Her tongue was blue. It was probably from cheap shots of alcohol.
Was this real beauty then? Was this the beginning or the end of her story? And had I become the boy my parents hoped I would be? I thought about the fact that this was once someone's little daughter. Somewhere in the world, an old man might be wondering what his daughter is doing. Am I really putting pleasure above my own morals and values?
With my semi-erect circumcised penis still exposed, I lifted her up. After giving her a kiss on her forehead, I pulled up my pants and left the toilets.
It was the usual last hour in any club ever. I met Louis and Gurb at the bar. "Should we have another drink?" I asked Gurb. "I feel like having a cocktail. Something sweet. Lots of sugar. What about you?"
Gurb looked at the menu. "A cognac would go down well right now."
"A cognac? You're only nineteen!" Gurb and Louis laughed. "Two Tequila Sunrises please!" I called to the bartender. "Also, two beers! Thanks!" I also got a beer for Louis. At first, I didn't want to, but I didn't want to spoil the mood either. Besides, I didn't want to show too much that it bothered me so much.
We danced away the last minutes. The club closed, and we decided to walk with the group of Swiss girls. Apparently, they were staying nearby.
As I lagged behind the group, one of them tried to start a conversation with me. "Are you okay?" she asked kindly.
"I'm fine. Just had too much beer. Makes me sleepy." Not true at all, but I've heard people say that.
"You’re tired? The fun has only just began!" And as she said this, she pulled something out of her inner pocket. Her clenched fist, shielded by a half jacket. Who is this girl, anyway? I thought to myself. She opened her hand flat, and right in the center of her palm lay two small pills with a smiley face on them. At least, they looked like it.
"Oh, I don’t do drugs. Sorry."
"Me neither!" And she swallowed a pill. "Now it’s your turn... Or are you scared?"
Scared? Who did this crazy Swiss witch (with really beautiful eyes) think she was. With her "are you scared". I'll show her who's scared.
"Scared? I’m not scared." I picked up the remaining pill and swallowed it.
Everything went in slow motion. Was this who I had become? Was this the same boy from high school? And just before I could swallow, I spat out the pill. She was shocked. I picked up the pill again, dried it with my jacket, and put it back in her fist. "Maybe later!" I shouted, running back to the group, over my shoulder.
I have nothing to say to 9 out of 10 peers I come across. Of course, I can be social. I can also have fun with random people in random situations, but that night, it just tired me out. I also didn't understand what we were doing there. Those girls found me strange anyway. Suddenly, I was the fifth wheel.
"We know this place where they go until 7 in the morning!" The girl leader of the group spoke. I wanted to go home. "If you guys want, you can go. Don't worry about me," I said to Gurb and Louis. The boys had a brief discussion. We agreed to stay for just a little while longer for some drinks. I consented. I was thirsty. "I'll have a Fanta, Louis."
Gurb had reached the last cigarette in his pack. Louis and a girl from the group were nowhere to be found. It didn't even bother me. This guy just walks around with some cash in his pocket and all hell breaks loose. After a night full of stimuli, I understood Louis. Of course, I understood Louis. He's a young god. Handsome, smart guy. But that didn't make me any less angry. It was purely about trust for me. Something inside me said I should stop subconsciously expecting things from people too. It prevents disappointment.
"Hotel please!" I jokingly suggested to Gurb. "Should you call Louis or should I?" I added. Gurb immediately grabbed his Android smartphone and called Louis. He put the call on speaker.
"Are you ready?" Gurb asked.
"Yeah. Sort of."
"What do you mean?"
"We didn't have sex."
"That's fine, right? Tomorrow's a new day!"
"I think I'm in love, man," Louis said.
"...," Gurb said, chuckling as he let out a sigh.
Once we arrived at the girls' hostel, it was already getting light. Louis was thankfully back. There were stains on his pants, around his knees. My focus was solely on arranging a taxi. Although the boys were still flirting, I was really done now. "How are we going to pay for this taxi?" I said a bit too loudly.
There was a silence. "Don't worry. I still have cash," Gurb said.
"Yeah, I knew you would," I replied.
My words clearly hit Louis. "What do you mean by that?" he said.
It was as if time stood still for a few seconds. "Exactly what I said. Better listen." Louis pulled out a small wad of green bills from his pocket. At least 400 euros. "I don't even want to see that money," I reacted. I walked away.
I'll just order a taxi myself.
"Why are you walking away now?" Gurb said.
"Twelve hours ago, I was alone too, and I had a lot more fun then."
"Do you really want to know how I got this money?" Louis said.
Yes, I did want to know. My whole evening revolved around that damn money.
He took a second of pause before he began speaking. "The answer lies in the Mini."
What on earth could be in Gurb's mother's car? Louis was trying to get into my head. "Taxi!"
Once in the taxi, the division was clear. Gurb was upfront, chatting animatedly with the driver. All adventures ever were recounted. Louis and I in the back. One of my best friends since I was thirteen. Funny how things turn out. It was quiet between us. I was in my head, rehearsing how I would bring up the money again. It didn't add up, and he knew it himself. "I don't care, you know," I said, hoping he'd break.
"What don't you care about?"
"About that money."
"What money? You're really a crazy woozy man." Louis burst out laughing again.
On the other hand, it was silent. Gurb had started talking about the driver's family. The driver didn't appreciate it. Gurb meant well. The driver smelled of alcohol. Or was it me? His nails were polished. Maybe his wife was a specialist. I bite my nails myself. Like now.
"In the Mini, oh yeah."
"Shut up. Illegal man."
"You'll never know."
"Stop playing. Just say it!"
Louis grabbed my head, pulled himself towards me, and brought his mouth to my right ear. "Why so serious?" he whispered. He didn't want to tell me.
"But always with this damn money, huh?" I almost shouted at Louis. I broke every silence within a radius of 10 kilometers.
"I'm trying my best, bro. It is what it is. I can't make it any different," he replied. It was clearly bothering him deeply. He ran his hands through his hair. "Sometimes people have to do things. And you know that better than anyone. Sometimes they have to do things they don't really want to or aren't supposed to do."
I knew this spiel all too well. Through all the drunken haziness, I suddenly saw a small glimmer of light. A tiny spark of sincerity. Louis was serious this time.
"I'm sorry. I didn't want to involve you in this. I'm sorry," sweat dripped from his forehead.
"You're serious, huh? Damn, man. What mess have you gotten yourself into now? Worse than Terschelling?" Worse than Terschelling would mean stolen goods. Maybe even violence.
"It's not what you think."
"The Adlon Hotel, right?" the driver chimed in. Always saved by the bell, that Louis.
Suddenly I hit my head against the seat in front of me. Of course, I wasn't wearing my seatbelt. The last thing I saw was Gurb waking up in panic from his drunken stupor. One by one, I started losing my senses. It started with the feeling in my fingers. For a brief moment, everything wasn't quite black, and I could only see a vague pattern of colors repeating inside my eyelids. You could compare it to the brief moment after the commercial break before the movie starts in the cinema. The movie was about to begin.
I knew I wasn't dying. At least not yet. Not like this. Not after an overall mediocre night out in Berlin. I found comfort in the image I forced myself to see. It was all in my head. There I was, unconscious.
I saw myself in a third-person point of view. It wasn't like I was actually leaving my body. More like there was a webcam hanging in one of the upper corners of the taxi.
As a child, I used to dream a lot about death. Nights spent awake.
At some point, I developed a kind of compulsive behavior. I kept swaying my torso from left to right with my hands under my head. It became almost like a workout before bedtime. Every night.
I called it dream shuffling. Just like I had learned to shuffle puzzle pieces or playing cards. Making things a little exciting for yourself. But what I almost never told anyone was that I was scared. I was afraid of burglars, who were very agile and muscular.
Especially afraid that they would murder me. I really wanted to know what death was like. It scared me.
These fear visions originated during an all-inclusive vacation in Turkey. I was 6 years old and already in bed. There was a big old TV in our hotel room, so I could secretly watch TV from bed. Every evening, my parents sat on the balcony. Here they discussed their day while enjoying a glass of alcohol. There was a Japanese animated series on TV. In the few seconds that I watched, I saw a scary creature climbing a sort of apartment complex via the balconies. The creature had hundreds of teeth and blond hair. It quickly entered to decapitate the people, then drained them and, as a final insult, robbed them. Dozens of carcasses of dead people were scattered around the apartment complex. The complex on TV resembled the resort where we were in reality, and the TV world merged with my surroundings. I became part of it. I saw people watching. No matter how loudly I screamed for help, they didn't react. The sun became very bright, and the people turned into nothing more than shadows. As the intensity of the sun increased, something became clear to me. These were not people. They had a sort of orange skin. Where I had previously thought it was their nose and mouth, it turned out that these shadowy figures did not have such physical features. They simply had three holes in their heads. The police tried to do something, but in vain. Since then, we always kept the light on in the hallway outside my bedroom. By rocking back and forth, from left to right, I could glance fleetingly at the beam of light under the door. That bit of light, escaping from the hallway into my room, gave me an advantage. It allowed me to stay one step ahead of the burglars. Pretty smart, right?
"From Jamaica to the world!
It’s just love. Why must the children play in the street?"
It was Bob Sinclar with "Love Generation" speaking to us through the taxi's speakers. We were stationary. I was conscious again, but I didn't feel alive at all. "How long was I out?" I asked Louis.
I could tell by his expression that he was relieved. Relieved that I was back. "One minute," he almost apologized. Louis gave me a pat on the shoulder. Gurb, on the other hand, was sleeping. He slept like a baby cub.
I put my right index finger on my forehead. It felt wet, but it wasn't blood. Blood feels different. Meanwhile, I kept hearing whistling.
"Be the love generation! Oh yeah!" It was still that same song by Bob Sinclar.
The earlier scent of alcohol had now been replaced by the smell of incense. It smelled like the same incense I had in my room. Sold to me as Tibetan 39 incense. I had bought it at a coffee shop in Rotterdam. I pulled up my notes on my phone. "Who lights incense in a CAR????" I let Louis read from my screen. He took the phone from my hands and started typing as well.
"Look at Gurb >>>" Gurb was so deeply asleep that his head drooped. His seatbelt held his torso in place, but his head ended up on the driver's shoulder. The man didn't mind. He didn't move. I made eye contact with the driver through the rearview mirror, and soon I found him. He winked at me.
We arrived at the hotel. Gurb awakened from his alcoholic hibernation. "Who's going to pay for the taxi?" I asked. Clearly rhetorical. I already knew I would take this one for the team, as usual. I refused to use Louis's money. It was uncomfortably quiet. "By card please," I said.
"I'll always protect you, Louis. You really need to know that. I care about you like my own little brother. I'll always try to help you. But you have to be honest with me. Can you do that?" Louis didn't hesitate.
"Yes. Yes, I can. I'll show you. It's really in the Mini." Meanwhile, the taxi driver's card machine indicated that I had insufficient funds. That couldn't be right. Maybe I had withdrawn too much that evening.
"I have cash in the hotel room," Gurb said to me. Gurb informed the driver in broken English that he would go get his cash. The driver agreed. Money is money, whether it comes now or later. As long as it feels good in your hands.
Louis and I got out of the taxi. "You're not going to light a cigarette now, are you?" Louis wanted to smoke. "Especially for stress. That's really for people who can't handle pain. You need to feel pain. Pain needs to brand you for the rest of your life so you finally learn not to do such stupid things." It fell silent again. My blood boiled. All pots were on the stove. I felt like Gordon Ramsay in the kitchen. "Show me then. Do it."
Louis remained silent and walked around the corner of the hotel. Towards the parking lot. I followed him. "You're not going to find much," said Louis.
"Why not? Are you a magician?"
"No. Just. Not much."
"So there's suddenly magically nothing in Gurb's car?"
"Stop. Get out. Get out of my head!" Louis shouted. Louis had had enough. He was done with the parade. Normally we dealt with hypothetical stories. Only this time it wasn't a joke. I was sure now. Louis had dropped his mask. The revolution had begun. The government had fallen and the dikes had broken. The people were in charge. "You shouldn't freak out like this. Always wanting more. Sweet boy, think about yourself."
After Gurb gave the money to the driver, he came to us. He had a smile on his face, lit a cigarette, and exclaimed, "Brothers!" Once with us, he hugged me. He started laughing. "Maybe I haven't been entirely honest either." Sometimes Gurb seemed like a 38-year-old man. In a positive way. He exuded confidence in a way I didn't often see. Affectionate, with a hint of authority.
We stood in the middle of a large parking lot. "Look. We've reached a point where I might not even care anymore. You guys are teasing me." It did matter to me. Maybe more than ever. I was supposed to be two steps ahead of them, but I couldn't figure it out. "I give up."
The delightful silence returned. Louis and Gurb looked at each other. "You guys win. Apparently, I'm not to be trusted as a friend."
From Louis's expression, I could tell he disagreed with this. "Not true. Come to the car."
We arrived at the car. Louis unlocked it and searched for the trunk button. Gurb had started his third cigarette. "It's a corpse, isn't it? Say it now. I can still help you. I can still help us. I can book a ticket for you. We can get you out of here," I said to Louis.
"Just wait. Nutcase."
"Why won't you accept my help?"
Louis started laughing nervously. Or at least it seemed that way. Perhaps a sly laugh too. Had Louis killed someone? "It's not a corpse. That can't be. You wouldn't be stupid enough to use their ID. You're smarter than that. So it must be something stolen. Haven't you found that button yet?"
Suddenly, we heard a click. Louis had found the button. Somewhere, I didn't want to know. Shouldn't I just trust Louis? Wasn't that the whole point of friendship?
Finally, the moment had arrived. I placed my right hand in the slot of the rear hatch. Something in me doubted. Still. I still doubted. Louis looked dead serious. "You wanted to know, didn't you? Then you also have to be man enough to accept it." Louis was clearly not joking. Or was he acting again? "Pussy," Louis said. I looked away. "You're afraid of what's inside, huh? You're afraid of the real Louis." He began to laugh manically. "Open that thing, man. Nutcase!"
I started laughing too. Why did I make such a big deal out of it? Sweat broke out from every pore in my body. It was even a bit damp in the no man's land between my scrotum and my anus. A tropical climate. It had been quite an adventure the whole evening. I took my hand off the rear hatch and first gave Louis a hug. Not some half-hearted birthday wish. No, a real hug.
"It's okay, buddy," Louis said to me. I had no idea what he meant by that. It fit the moment though.
It was really time now. I opened the rear hatch.
"Where is it?"
"In front of you," said Louis.
"In some secret compartment?"
There was nothing in the trunk. Absolutely nothing. An empty trunk. For an empty evening, in an empty Berlin, with an empty group of guys. I didn't get it.
"You won, man," I whispered. "You finally fucking done did it."
I couldn't believe my eyes. Empty? There was still nothing in the car. Louis just stood there. Emotionally, I was a wreck. I had felt every emotion this evening. Seen every color and smelled every scent. I was done. My body was ready. No longer needed. My mission was complete.
"But why did you do this?" I asked Louis, laughing.
He scratched his chin. It felt like the end of a bad movie.
"I sold our Playstation. Wanted to tell you only after I had sorted everything out again. I terminated my lease. Had some debts, and I also wanted to have some money for once. Once not empty-handed in the club. Once not dependent on my best friends. This is not who I am... I know how much that Playstation meant to you. It was ours together. I should have just told you."
"… and how does Gurb actually make his money?"
submitted by djavulensfitta to Joostklein [link] [comments]
"How come he suddenly has cash?" I looked at Gurb, but he avoided my gaze. Louis never had money and yet he was buying another round. Meanwhile, a Moby song was playing and nothing made sense. "If he has money for drinks, he can surely pay me back, right?"
Just a few hours ago, I was alone in Berlin. Now, ten hours later, I'm standing in some obscure techno club with my best friends. Loud rock music with drunken shouting. "Hey, Miss Murder, can I make beauty stay if I take my life?" I woke up that day with a mild hangover from the lonely yet people-filled night before. Perfect conditions for a 20-year-old dropout.
The Hard Rock Café was the most beautifully ugly place in Berlin. Gurb had driven for seven hours straight in his mother's car, but we didn't notice. An iconic black Mini Cooper. Your body leads your mind, the beat never stops, and you can conquer the world. Louis threw in another crazy dance move. We were happy.
"Do you want another drink, brother?" Gurb asked me, half shouting. An evening filled with rhetorical questions. He saw me dancing and already knew the answer.
Gurb always had money. Louis, on the other hand, never did. Louis was also the youngest of us three. He had just turned 18. I wouldn't call him a cunning fox. More like a jack-of-all-trades. Like the time he made a lot of money on a Wadden Island with a group of boys. They sold large blocks of hash.
"Crazy dude!" I shouted at him. He yelled something back.
"Do you remember back then?" Louis said.
"Back then? Back then? Yeah man, of course!" I had no idea what he meant. "Do you mean the party?"
"Do you mean the party, he says! This guy. When I look at you like this, it makes me happy. The exact same kid is here letting loose just like back in high school!"
We knew each other from secondary school. He joined when I was in the second grade. He was very intelligent. Too young, too much knowledge of the world. His mother is from Brazil. We often went to his mother's place to play on the Playstation Louis and I had bought together.
I lived everywhere at that time. In the crisis shelter where I stayed for a while, for example, I wasn't allowed to have a Playstation. So we set it up in an accessible place, near school. It was always fun with Louis. Going together to the Apple Store. Taking all kinds of photos with all the webcams, posting them on Hyves, and then leaving. Louis always knew how to cheer me up.
"Aaaaaaaaaa!" There was Gurb with five drinks in his hands. Gurb was wearing a blue checkered shirt. Two buttons undone. Hair slicked back. "You look good, brother!"
"You look fresh too! We all look fresh!" Gurb said enthusiastically. Louis was wearing a completely white outfit. We quickly bought this before going out. He also bleached his hair.
"You look like the Brazilian cousin of James Dean in these clothes," I said. Louis laughed. "Let me take a picture."
Suddenly, the DJ switched to some kind of techno. "Ah, here Berlin briefly takes off its mask." I was fine with it all. Louis was talking to a lady.
Voluptuous breasts, I thought to myself. He gave her one of his two drinks.
"He's with a girl and he's thinking with his dick," I said to Gurb. "Let him be, tonight Berlin is ours!"
The bass kept pounding. "I simply don't have the patience for the club," I said to Gurb. He looked surprised. Like a sweet dog, tilting his head. "I'm just waiting for tomorrow. Can't do my thing here. Don't have patience for the already known. I want adventure and I want it now!"
Gurb started laughing. "Patience is a virtue." Yes. Patience is all well and good, but I think it's a waste of my time. Gurb grabbed my shoulder.
"I think it's time for another beer."
Louis and I were walking through Leeuwarden a year ago when suddenly a red Ford Ka stopped in front of us. It was Gurb, casually driving around the city. He invited us into his car. We hopped in. Since that afternoon, the three of us were together. A few months later, Louis got a tattoo on his ribs in honor of our friendship. It was the name of our group chat. Braddar Force Indigo.
There were also days when Gurb would take me for a drive around Friesland. He reminded me how beautiful Friesland is. The world doesn't spin there. The newspapers I threw away in the Stiens forest in 2011 could still be lying in the same spot, so to speak.
Just before midnight, I found myself in line for the restroom. My eyes fell on a pair of striking shoes. Cigarette smoke invaded my nose for the fourth time. "Müssen Sie eine Zigarette haben?" a female voice spoke to me. I felt like Tom Hanks in the final scene of Angels & Demons, where the new pope first steps onto the balcony. The curtains opened. There I was, witnessing an important moment in history. I was just told how I was sent by God, but my ears didn't want to hear any of it. At least that's how I felt. My mouth was empty. I had no words left. That's when I knew for sure. Berlin might really be as crazy as literally everyone says.
Dark blond, silky hair. Was this real beauty then? She wouldn't look 40, but I think she was. A true woman. Beautiful in all her elegance. I always joked about being interested in older women, but tonight one stood in front of me. "I don't smoke," I said to her.
Someone tapped me. "Please, just go to the toilet!" He was right. I hadn't peed in a while either. My urine was cloudy. "Glomerulonephritis," I said to myself on the toilet. This is an unusual condition. It's an inflammation in the kidneys, I thought I remembered. They should never have given me access to Google.
The evening progressed, and Louis kept buying rounds. "But seriously now. How does Louis suddenly have all that money for drinks?" I asked Gurb. He was outside smoking with a group of Swiss girls. I had strategically positioned myself so that I could always leave the crime scene if necessary.
"You shouldn't ask me," said Gurb. He was laughing with the temporary girlfriend group of Louis. Gurb has a beard. A lot of chicks like that. I get it too.
As much as I enjoyed Louis and Gurb being here for me, something didn't sit right with me. It couldn't just be about the money. "What's up with him?" I heard one of the Swiss girls say to Gurb.
Those kinds of questions really tire me out. "Not much, with you?" I replied.
They all started laughing. "That's not what she meant, brother," said Gurb.
"I couldn't care less whether she meant it or not. Send that brace-face back to Switzerland. Don't drive me crazy, alright!"
Actually, I hadn't drunk that much that evening. "Two vodka Sprites, please!" It's rare for me to get just one drink. "I always get two drinks, then you have to wait shorter for the third one!" Maybe the alcohol was affecting me more than I wanted to admit. Oh well, it was still the three of us against the world.
"Nice shoes, are those Prada?" I asked a random girl at the bar.
"No, these are fake. Why would I buy real ones for 600 dollars if I could just buy these for 20?"
"..."
I'm not very good at that. Talking. To women.
Louis and Gurb were in the smoking area now. It was less blue than the dance floor itself. My clothes already stank, so a visit to the smoking area couldn't hurt. "These people are so underground!" Gurb shouted. Louis was filming him with his phone. "These people..." There was a brief pause. As if Gurb forgot the only line he had. "...so underground!" All three of us burst into laughter. The alcohol flowed through our veins as if it came from the purest mountains. People seemed doubled and the room was full. We had been in the same club in Berlin for several hours.
"Leonardo! What are you hiding from the big boss?" I sometimes called Louis ‘DiCaprio.’ "You a rich guy, now?" I said, with an accent as if I were from the Bronx.
Louis started laughing. "Eh, you know nothing. Bullshit talk."
I had to laugh too. What was I even worried about? Friends are friends, with or without money. That shouldn't matter. Louis probably just worked for that money. Maybe it wasn't as bad as I thought. Maybe he just had enough to buy rounds. But what if my gut feeling was right? That feeling was never wrong. Except for that one time at the Holland Casino in Groningen. Even the best of us have slip-ups. I was just getting worked up again. When it comes down to it, Louis is one of the sweetest guys I know. I had to let it go. After all, it's still Louis.
"I think I'm going to have sex soon, man," Louis said.
"With who?" I asked immediately.
"That one girl."
"Which one?"
"The one with the boobs."
"Oh, her. Just be careful."
"What kind of reaction is that?" Louis asked indignantly.
I'd only had four drinks, but I was acting like a mess. Louis was right. I didn't understand myself. Where was my head at? I'm here in Berlin, supposed to be having the time of my life, but here I am feeling lonely and sad again. Joost once again couldn't control his emotions.
"Sorry," I suddenly said to Louis. "Sorry for my behavior. Been acting dumb towards you all night. It's unnecessary." Sometimes I have that. Mood swings. "Know that crime is never the solution. We've talked about this so many times. Yes, it's tempting and sometimes easy money. I sometimes find it amusing too, but it's always hypothetical. Ask me for help. I can help you, even with illegal things. I'll always have your back." The dancing was kind of over.
The words I had just placed on Louis's plate came from my heart. My Frisian, irregular boys' heart.
Crying in the club. I had never seen myself like that. Crying, yes. In the club, no. I never understood the taboo around crying. Or emotions in general. I saw myself in the mirror. They weren't tears of joy. They weren't tears of sadness either. It was me letting everything go. All the emotions I had ever felt. The emotions I felt between my brother and sister and myself because they wanted to take on a parental role over me, but I was in puberty, so I pushed them away. The emotions I felt when my old neighbors were supposed to take care of my dog, but didn't tell me that he was bitten by one of their dogs. They didn't have money for the surgery, they later told me. They were ashamed of their lack of money. My dog died from this injury. Even the emotions that were all jumping at once during the retake for my swimming diploma A, I let go of.
No emotions. Just for a moment, not feeling anything. Is that too much to ask for?
"You still don’t smoke?"
It had to be the voice of the woman with the cigarettes. I looked over my shoulder through the mirror. It was her. The one with dark blond, silky hair.
"Not to be rude, but this is the men’s room," I said. She took a step closer and kissed me on my lips. It tasted like more. We started kissing. It had been a while since I had had female contact at this level. It probably didn't look good and it didn't feel good either. She started kissing my neck. Slowly, I noticed the pressure in the erectile tissues of my penis starting to increase. "I really don't have time for this!" I thought to myself. The woman with the cigarettes started to slowly sink down until she was on her knees. I didn't want this. Not now, not like this. She unraveled my penis from my Polo Ralph Lauren underwear. Her tongue was blue. It was probably from cheap shots of alcohol.
Was this real beauty then? Was this the beginning or the end of her story? And had I become the boy my parents hoped I would be? I thought about the fact that this was once someone's little daughter. Somewhere in the world, an old man might be wondering what his daughter is doing. Am I really putting pleasure above my own morals and values?
With my semi-erect circumcised penis still exposed, I lifted her up. After giving her a kiss on her forehead, I pulled up my pants and left the toilets.
It was the usual last hour in any club ever. I met Louis and Gurb at the bar. "Should we have another drink?" I asked Gurb. "I feel like having a cocktail. Something sweet. Lots of sugar. What about you?"
Gurb looked at the menu. "A cognac would go down well right now."
"A cognac? You're only nineteen!" Gurb and Louis laughed. "Two Tequila Sunrises please!" I called to the bartender. "Also, two beers! Thanks!" I also got a beer for Louis. At first, I didn't want to, but I didn't want to spoil the mood either. Besides, I didn't want to show too much that it bothered me so much.
We danced away the last minutes. The club closed, and we decided to walk with the group of Swiss girls. Apparently, they were staying nearby.
As I lagged behind the group, one of them tried to start a conversation with me. "Are you okay?" she asked kindly.
"I'm fine. Just had too much beer. Makes me sleepy." Not true at all, but I've heard people say that.
"You’re tired? The fun has only just began!" And as she said this, she pulled something out of her inner pocket. Her clenched fist, shielded by a half jacket. Who is this girl, anyway? I thought to myself. She opened her hand flat, and right in the center of her palm lay two small pills with a smiley face on them. At least, they looked like it.
"Oh, I don’t do drugs. Sorry."
"Me neither!" And she swallowed a pill. "Now it’s your turn... Or are you scared?"
Scared? Who did this crazy Swiss witch (with really beautiful eyes) think she was. With her "are you scared". I'll show her who's scared.
"Scared? I’m not scared." I picked up the remaining pill and swallowed it.
Everything went in slow motion. Was this who I had become? Was this the same boy from high school? And just before I could swallow, I spat out the pill. She was shocked. I picked up the pill again, dried it with my jacket, and put it back in her fist. "Maybe later!" I shouted, running back to the group, over my shoulder.
I have nothing to say to 9 out of 10 peers I come across. Of course, I can be social. I can also have fun with random people in random situations, but that night, it just tired me out. I also didn't understand what we were doing there. Those girls found me strange anyway. Suddenly, I was the fifth wheel.
"We know this place where they go until 7 in the morning!" The girl leader of the group spoke. I wanted to go home. "If you guys want, you can go. Don't worry about me," I said to Gurb and Louis. The boys had a brief discussion. We agreed to stay for just a little while longer for some drinks. I consented. I was thirsty. "I'll have a Fanta, Louis."
Gurb had reached the last cigarette in his pack. Louis and a girl from the group were nowhere to be found. It didn't even bother me. This guy just walks around with some cash in his pocket and all hell breaks loose. After a night full of stimuli, I understood Louis. Of course, I understood Louis. He's a young god. Handsome, smart guy. But that didn't make me any less angry. It was purely about trust for me. Something inside me said I should stop subconsciously expecting things from people too. It prevents disappointment.
"Hotel please!" I jokingly suggested to Gurb. "Should you call Louis or should I?" I added. Gurb immediately grabbed his Android smartphone and called Louis. He put the call on speaker.
"Are you ready?" Gurb asked.
"Yeah. Sort of."
"What do you mean?"
"We didn't have sex."
"That's fine, right? Tomorrow's a new day!"
"I think I'm in love, man," Louis said.
"...," Gurb said, chuckling as he let out a sigh.
Once we arrived at the girls' hostel, it was already getting light. Louis was thankfully back. There were stains on his pants, around his knees. My focus was solely on arranging a taxi. Although the boys were still flirting, I was really done now. "How are we going to pay for this taxi?" I said a bit too loudly.
There was a silence. "Don't worry. I still have cash," Gurb said.
"Yeah, I knew you would," I replied.
My words clearly hit Louis. "What do you mean by that?" he said.
It was as if time stood still for a few seconds. "Exactly what I said. Better listen." Louis pulled out a small wad of green bills from his pocket. At least 400 euros. "I don't even want to see that money," I reacted. I walked away.
I'll just order a taxi myself.
"Why are you walking away now?" Gurb said.
"Twelve hours ago, I was alone too, and I had a lot more fun then."
"Do you really want to know how I got this money?" Louis said.
Yes, I did want to know. My whole evening revolved around that damn money.
He took a second of pause before he began speaking. "The answer lies in the Mini."
What on earth could be in Gurb's mother's car? Louis was trying to get into my head. "Taxi!"
Once in the taxi, the division was clear. Gurb was upfront, chatting animatedly with the driver. All adventures ever were recounted. Louis and I in the back. One of my best friends since I was thirteen. Funny how things turn out. It was quiet between us. I was in my head, rehearsing how I would bring up the money again. It didn't add up, and he knew it himself. "I don't care, you know," I said, hoping he'd break.
"What don't you care about?"
"About that money."
"What money? You're really a crazy woozy man." Louis burst out laughing again.
On the other hand, it was silent. Gurb had started talking about the driver's family. The driver didn't appreciate it. Gurb meant well. The driver smelled of alcohol. Or was it me? His nails were polished. Maybe his wife was a specialist. I bite my nails myself. Like now.
"In the Mini, oh yeah."
"Shut up. Illegal man."
"You'll never know."
"Stop playing. Just say it!"
Louis grabbed my head, pulled himself towards me, and brought his mouth to my right ear. "Why so serious?" he whispered. He didn't want to tell me.
"But always with this damn money, huh?" I almost shouted at Louis. I broke every silence within a radius of 10 kilometers.
"I'm trying my best, bro. It is what it is. I can't make it any different," he replied. It was clearly bothering him deeply. He ran his hands through his hair. "Sometimes people have to do things. And you know that better than anyone. Sometimes they have to do things they don't really want to or aren't supposed to do."
I knew this spiel all too well. Through all the drunken haziness, I suddenly saw a small glimmer of light. A tiny spark of sincerity. Louis was serious this time.
"I'm sorry. I didn't want to involve you in this. I'm sorry," sweat dripped from his forehead.
"You're serious, huh? Damn, man. What mess have you gotten yourself into now? Worse than Terschelling?" Worse than Terschelling would mean stolen goods. Maybe even violence.
"It's not what you think."
"The Adlon Hotel, right?" the driver chimed in. Always saved by the bell, that Louis.
Suddenly I hit my head against the seat in front of me. Of course, I wasn't wearing my seatbelt. The last thing I saw was Gurb waking up in panic from his drunken stupor. One by one, I started losing my senses. It started with the feeling in my fingers. For a brief moment, everything wasn't quite black, and I could only see a vague pattern of colors repeating inside my eyelids. You could compare it to the brief moment after the commercial break before the movie starts in the cinema. The movie was about to begin.
I knew I wasn't dying. At least not yet. Not like this. Not after an overall mediocre night out in Berlin. I found comfort in the image I forced myself to see. It was all in my head. There I was, unconscious.
I saw myself in a third-person point of view. It wasn't like I was actually leaving my body. More like there was a webcam hanging in one of the upper corners of the taxi.
As a child, I used to dream a lot about death. Nights spent awake.
At some point, I developed a kind of compulsive behavior. I kept swaying my torso from left to right with my hands under my head. It became almost like a workout before bedtime. Every night.
I called it dream shuffling. Just like I had learned to shuffle puzzle pieces or playing cards. Making things a little exciting for yourself. But what I almost never told anyone was that I was scared. I was afraid of burglars, who were very agile and muscular.
Especially afraid that they would murder me. I really wanted to know what death was like. It scared me.
These fear visions originated during an all-inclusive vacation in Turkey. I was 6 years old and already in bed. There was a big old TV in our hotel room, so I could secretly watch TV from bed. Every evening, my parents sat on the balcony. Here they discussed their day while enjoying a glass of alcohol. There was a Japanese animated series on TV. In the few seconds that I watched, I saw a scary creature climbing a sort of apartment complex via the balconies. The creature had hundreds of teeth and blond hair. It quickly entered to decapitate the people, then drained them and, as a final insult, robbed them. Dozens of carcasses of dead people were scattered around the apartment complex. The complex on TV resembled the resort where we were in reality, and the TV world merged with my surroundings. I became part of it. I saw people watching. No matter how loudly I screamed for help, they didn't react. The sun became very bright, and the people turned into nothing more than shadows. As the intensity of the sun increased, something became clear to me. These were not people. They had a sort of orange skin. Where I had previously thought it was their nose and mouth, it turned out that these shadowy figures did not have such physical features. They simply had three holes in their heads. The police tried to do something, but in vain. Since then, we always kept the light on in the hallway outside my bedroom. By rocking back and forth, from left to right, I could glance fleetingly at the beam of light under the door. That bit of light, escaping from the hallway into my room, gave me an advantage. It allowed me to stay one step ahead of the burglars. Pretty smart, right?
"From Jamaica to the world!
It’s just love. Why must the children play in the street?"
It was Bob Sinclar with "Love Generation" speaking to us through the taxi's speakers. We were stationary. I was conscious again, but I didn't feel alive at all. "How long was I out?" I asked Louis.
I could tell by his expression that he was relieved. Relieved that I was back. "One minute," he almost apologized. Louis gave me a pat on the shoulder. Gurb, on the other hand, was sleeping. He slept like a baby cub.
I put my right index finger on my forehead. It felt wet, but it wasn't blood. Blood feels different. Meanwhile, I kept hearing whistling.
"Be the love generation! Oh yeah!" It was still that same song by Bob Sinclar.
The earlier scent of alcohol had now been replaced by the smell of incense. It smelled like the same incense I had in my room. Sold to me as Tibetan 39 incense. I had bought it at a coffee shop in Rotterdam. I pulled up my notes on my phone. "Who lights incense in a CAR????" I let Louis read from my screen. He took the phone from my hands and started typing as well.
"Look at Gurb >>>" Gurb was so deeply asleep that his head drooped. His seatbelt held his torso in place, but his head ended up on the driver's shoulder. The man didn't mind. He didn't move. I made eye contact with the driver through the rearview mirror, and soon I found him. He winked at me.
We arrived at the hotel. Gurb awakened from his alcoholic hibernation. "Who's going to pay for the taxi?" I asked. Clearly rhetorical. I already knew I would take this one for the team, as usual. I refused to use Louis's money. It was uncomfortably quiet. "By card please," I said.
"I'll always protect you, Louis. You really need to know that. I care about you like my own little brother. I'll always try to help you. But you have to be honest with me. Can you do that?" Louis didn't hesitate.
"Yes. Yes, I can. I'll show you. It's really in the Mini." Meanwhile, the taxi driver's card machine indicated that I had insufficient funds. That couldn't be right. Maybe I had withdrawn too much that evening.
"I have cash in the hotel room," Gurb said to me. Gurb informed the driver in broken English that he would go get his cash. The driver agreed. Money is money, whether it comes now or later. As long as it feels good in your hands.
Louis and I got out of the taxi. "You're not going to light a cigarette now, are you?" Louis wanted to smoke. "Especially for stress. That's really for people who can't handle pain. You need to feel pain. Pain needs to brand you for the rest of your life so you finally learn not to do such stupid things." It fell silent again. My blood boiled. All pots were on the stove. I felt like Gordon Ramsay in the kitchen. "Show me then. Do it."
Louis remained silent and walked around the corner of the hotel. Towards the parking lot. I followed him. "You're not going to find much," said Louis.
"Why not? Are you a magician?"
"No. Just. Not much."
"So there's suddenly magically nothing in Gurb's car?"
"Stop. Get out. Get out of my head!" Louis shouted. Louis had had enough. He was done with the parade. Normally we dealt with hypothetical stories. Only this time it wasn't a joke. I was sure now. Louis had dropped his mask. The revolution had begun. The government had fallen and the dikes had broken. The people were in charge. "You shouldn't freak out like this. Always wanting more. Sweet boy, think about yourself."
After Gurb gave the money to the driver, he came to us. He had a smile on his face, lit a cigarette, and exclaimed, "Brothers!" Once with us, he hugged me. He started laughing. "Maybe I haven't been entirely honest either." Sometimes Gurb seemed like a 38-year-old man. In a positive way. He exuded confidence in a way I didn't often see. Affectionate, with a hint of authority.
We stood in the middle of a large parking lot. "Look. We've reached a point where I might not even care anymore. You guys are teasing me." It did matter to me. Maybe more than ever. I was supposed to be two steps ahead of them, but I couldn't figure it out. "I give up."
The delightful silence returned. Louis and Gurb looked at each other. "You guys win. Apparently, I'm not to be trusted as a friend."
From Louis's expression, I could tell he disagreed with this. "Not true. Come to the car."
We arrived at the car. Louis unlocked it and searched for the trunk button. Gurb had started his third cigarette. "It's a corpse, isn't it? Say it now. I can still help you. I can still help us. I can book a ticket for you. We can get you out of here," I said to Louis.
"Just wait. Nutcase."
"Why won't you accept my help?"
Louis started laughing nervously. Or at least it seemed that way. Perhaps a sly laugh too. Had Louis killed someone? "It's not a corpse. That can't be. You wouldn't be stupid enough to use their ID. You're smarter than that. So it must be something stolen. Haven't you found that button yet?"
Suddenly, we heard a click. Louis had found the button. Somewhere, I didn't want to know. Shouldn't I just trust Louis? Wasn't that the whole point of friendship?
Finally, the moment had arrived. I placed my right hand in the slot of the rear hatch. Something in me doubted. Still. I still doubted. Louis looked dead serious. "You wanted to know, didn't you? Then you also have to be man enough to accept it." Louis was clearly not joking. Or was he acting again? "Pussy," Louis said. I looked away. "You're afraid of what's inside, huh? You're afraid of the real Louis." He began to laugh manically. "Open that thing, man. Nutcase!"
I started laughing too. Why did I make such a big deal out of it? Sweat broke out from every pore in my body. It was even a bit damp in the no man's land between my scrotum and my anus. A tropical climate. It had been quite an adventure the whole evening. I took my hand off the rear hatch and first gave Louis a hug. Not some half-hearted birthday wish. No, a real hug.
"It's okay, buddy," Louis said to me. I had no idea what he meant by that. It fit the moment though.
It was really time now. I opened the rear hatch.
"Where is it?"
"In front of you," said Louis.
"In some secret compartment?"
There was nothing in the trunk. Absolutely nothing. An empty trunk. For an empty evening, in an empty Berlin, with an empty group of guys. I didn't get it.
"You won, man," I whispered. "You finally fucking done did it."
I couldn't believe my eyes. Empty? There was still nothing in the car. Louis just stood there. Emotionally, I was a wreck. I had felt every emotion this evening. Seen every color and smelled every scent. I was done. My body was ready. No longer needed. My mission was complete.
"But why did you do this?" I asked Louis, laughing.
He scratched his chin. It felt like the end of a bad movie.
"I sold our Playstation. Wanted to tell you only after I had sorted everything out again. I terminated my lease. Had some debts, and I also wanted to have some money for once. Once not empty-handed in the club. Once not dependent on my best friends. This is not who I am... I know how much that Playstation meant to you. It was ours together. I should have just told you."
"… and how does Gurb actually make his money?"
2024.05.18 18:24 DoublleA Can somebody use undetectable AI for me?
Sorry if this sounds selfish but this is really only a one time thing for a friend. I need someone to use there undetectable AI account to paraphrase this please.
IntroductionThe rise of fast food chains in the United States from 2000 to 2010 had an impact on both the culture and economy. This period saw an increase in obesity rates among Americans, which coincided with the growth of these eateries. In this essay we delve into the connection between the expansion of fast food franchises and the obesity epidemic examining factors that influence health. Through an analysis of data, health studies and relevant literature our goal is to provide an understanding of how consuming food has played a role in fueling obesity during this particular decade, in America.The Growth of Fast Food Chains
Between 2000 and 2010 there was a rise in the fast food industry. Popular chains such as McDonalds, Burger King and Subway expanded their reach by opening stores to meet the demand for budget friendly meals. Data from the U.S. Census Bureau shows that the number of fast food eateries increased by around 20% during this timeframe (U.S. Census Bureau, 2011). This expansion made fast food more convenient for a range of people, including kids and teenagers.
Obesity Trends in the U.S. (2000 2010)
The prevalence of obesity in America has been on a trajectory during the early years of the 21st century. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) the rate of obesity among adults rose from 30.5% in 2000 to 35.7% in 2010 (CDC, 2011). Similarly among children and teens aged between 2 and 19 years old obesity rates increased from 13.9% to 16.9% over that period. This continuous increase signals a concerning public health issue with impacts on illness rates, mortality rates and healthcare expenses.
The Impact of Fast Food, on Eating Habits
food is commonly known for its levels of calories, excessive saturated fats, sugars and sodium with little nutritional value. These aspects of food are closely associated with weight gain and obesity. Studies show that regular consumption of food is linked to consuming calories and maintaining poor eating habits (Bowman & Vineyard 2004). Research conducted by Pereira et al. (2005) revealed that individuals who ate food than twice a week were more likely to gain weight and develop insulin resistance compared to those who consumed it less frequently.
Influence of Socioeconomic Factors
The easy availability and affordability of food make it an attractive option for people with incomes. Fast food establishments are often concentrated in low income areas where residents have limited access to dining choices (Powell et al. 2007). This situation, referred to as "food deserts " , worsens the issue of obesity because disadvantaged groups tend to rely on food as their main source of nutrition.
Impact of Advertising and Promotion
The aggressive advertising tactics used by fast food companies also have a significant influence on eating behaviors particularly among young individuals, like children and teenagers.
Many businesses invest sums of money each year in marketing showcasing their products across platforms, like TV, the web and social networks. Kids are especially influenced by these strategies that highlight the appeal and ease of food reinforcing harmful dietary patterns early on.
The impact of obesity, on health is significant and variedObesity is a factor in chronic illnesses like type 2 diabetes, heart disease, stroke and certain cancers (Flegal et al., 2012). The rise in obesity rates has led to an increase in health issues putting a strain on the healthcare system. The financial implications of obesity are also noteworthy with studies indicating that medical costs linked to obesity made up around 10% of healthcare expenses in the United States during that time (Cawley & Meyerhoefer 2012).
Policies and public health effortsIn response to the escalating obesity crisis, different policies and public health efforts have been put into action at state and local levels. These initiatives aim to encourage eating habits through measures like food labeling requirements, restrictions on advertising foods to children and campaigns raising awareness about the risks of obesity (Koplan et al., 2007). Schools have been a point for intervention well, with endeavors to enhance the nutritional value of school meals and boost physical activity among students.ExamplesVarious real life examples and stories showcase the effectiveness of taking action to address the issue of obesity. For example, New York City put in place a set of strategies to combat obesity, such as displaying calorie information on menus and prohibiting trans fats in restaurant dishes. These initiatives led to improvements in people's eating habits and a slight decrease in obesity levels, within the community (Dumanovsky et al. 2011).ChallengesThe obesity epidemic still poses challenges despite the efforts to address it. Unhealthy eating habits deeply ingrained in society, the presence of the fast food industry and disparities in status all add layers of complexity to this issue. Moving forward it is crucial to focus on creating an environment that encourages choices for vulnerable communities. This entails advocating for policies that restrict the marketing of foods to children, enhancing access to options in low income areas and urging food companies to improve the health profile of their products.
Psychological marketingWhen it comes to food marketing companies go beyond advertising tactics by leveraging deep rooted psychological triggers that influence consumer behavior. Bright colors, catchy tunes and recognizable mascots are commonly used in food ads to build a memorable brand image. This technique is particularly effective with audiences like children and teenagers who're more susceptible and likely to develop lasting brand loyalties. Research indicates that exposure to these advertisements can lead children to prefer calorie, nutrient foods ultimately impacting their dietary decisions and contributing to weight gain (Boyland & Halford 2013).The impact of portion sizes
One overlooked but significant factor contributing to the obesity crisis is the increasing sizes of portions served by food chains. Over time portion sizes have substantially grown, with meals exceeding the recommended calorie intake for a single meal. Young and Nestles (2002) study reveals that fast food item portions have expanded over the years with some items now more than double their size. This phenomenon of "portion distortion" results in calorie consumption as individuals tend to eat when faced with larger servings often underestimating the actual caloric content.
Changes in lifestyle and time constraints
The contemporary way of life characterized by schedules and time limitations has also played a role in the heightened dependence on fast food. With an increase in dual income households and longer work hours many people find themselves lacking the time to cook meals. Fast food emerges as a solution offering cost effective options that align with busy routines. Nonetheless this convenience comes at a price as frequent consumption of food is linked to dietary patterns and increased calorie intake contributing to the surge in obesity rates (Smith, Ng & Popkin 2013).Another significant measure involves restricting the promotion of foods to children. By reducing kids exposure to food ads policymakers aim to lessen the impact of marketing on their eating habits. Some cities have also imposed taxes on beverages and unhealthy foods in an effort to discourage consumption through penalties. While the effectiveness of these strategies may vary they mark progress in combating the obesity crisis.
Approaches Rooted in Communities
Community based strategies for addressing obesity highlight the importance of initiatives and grassroots movements. Programs that concentrate on enhancing access to foods encouraging activity and educating community members about healthy eating have shown positive outcomes. For example community gardens and farmers markets can offer produce to residents living in areas with access to healthy food options promoting better dietary choices. Schools and community centers can also play a role by providing nutrition education and physical activity programs.
The Impact of Technology
Technology has increasingly become an asset in the battle against obesity. Mobile applications and wearable gadgets enable individuals to monitor their calorie intake and exercise levels offering feedback and motivating lifestyle choices.
Furthermore social networking sites can play a role, in advocating for public health initiatives and sharing details on diet and wellness. Although technology isn't a solution to the issue of obesity it provides avenues to involve people and groups in embracing healthier habits (Stephens & Allen 2013).
Future Directions and Recommendations
The approach to tackling obesity needs to be multi-faceted and should involve collaboration between government departments, health workers, local communities, as well as the food industry. In future, there is need for more efforts in creating an atmosphere that supports healthier selections particularly among the disadvantaged groups. This means that one should continue to campaign for policies aimed at reducing children’s exposure to unhealthy food advertisements, improving availability of healthy foods in deprived neighborhoods and encouraging manufacturers in the food sector to change their products into a healthier version.
Further still public health campaigns will try and focus on having balanced diets regularly done exercises. Schools and offices can succeed by developing well-structured meals alongside opportunities for exercising. More research is also needed to understand why some people are poor eaters or overweight than others.
Policy Proposals
To further combat the menace of overweight, policy makers should think about enacting a variety of evidence-based strategies. Some of them could be: Sugar-Sweetened Beverage Taxes: Taxes on sugary drinks can decrease consumption and raise funds for public health projects. Zoning Regulations: By controlling the number of fast food restaurants in given areas, intake will subside and encourage establishment of grocery stores among other healthier alternatives.Menu Labeling Laws: This makes sure that restaurants indicate calorie counts as well as other nutritional information to assist customers in making informed choices. School Nutrition Standards: Schools meals and snacks in the course of learning ought to meet recommended nutrition levels so that students are eating healthy. Addressing Behavioral FactorsBehavioral interventions also play a significant role in dealing with obesity. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and other psychological approaches aid individuals to develop better eating habits and deal with triggers involved in overeating. Programs addressing weight control which incorporate behavior change counseling together with diet and exercise components show promise towards helping individuals achieve successful long term weight loss.Long-Term Commitment and Sustainable Change
Society must collectively make a commitment that will last over a long period to reduce obesity rates. The approach should be ongoing and flexible enough to accommodate changing circumstances and new information. For this change to be lasting, there must be continuous investment in public health infrastructure, research, and education. Therefore, significant strides can be achieved in reducing obesity rates by nurturing a culture that appreciates wellness.
Cultural Shifts and Public Perception
In addressing the obesity epidemic another critical factor is shifting public opinion as well as cultural norms with regards to food and health. The acceptance of fast food and oversize portions as normative has been one of the major drivers towards unhealthy eating habits over the past few decades. This would involve public health campaigns focused on what constitutes healthy balanced meals and promoting on good home cooked fresh meal benefits instead. To change public perception cooking classes nutrition workshops media campaign advertising preparation advantages of healthy meals at home for instance.
Strengthening Health Care Interventions
Routine screenings, counseling and support for weight management by health care providers are crucial in handling obesity. Obesity prevention and treatment should be integrated into primary care to ensure consistency and comprehensiveness in people’s health. Personalized advice can be availed by the healthcare practitioners and also set realistic targets as well as referring patients to dietitians or structured weight loss programs.
Advancing Research and Use of Proven Practices
To better understand the intricate contributors to obesity and curate effective interventions, it is important to sustain research. Longitudinal studies that follow diet patterns, activity levels, and disease outcomes offer useful information on how to prevent or reduce obesity. By exploring behavioral, environmental and genetic factors that affect obesity, this will enable us to make interventions that are specific for different populations and situations as well.
Conclusion
The period between 2000 and 2010 registered a sharp increase of obesity rates that is closely linked to the spread of fast food outlets across America. This public health menace can only be fought with multidimensional approaches that will change public attitude, improve education, enhance corporate accountability and support inclusive research plus health care interventions. By creating an environment where good health is appreciated through provision of necessary resources and support, we can achieve significant milestones in curbing cases of obesity within our population as well as overall improvement in their welfare.
Citations:
Boyland, E.J. & Halford, J.C.G., 2013. Television advertising and branding. Effects on eating behavior and food preferences in children. **Appetite**, 62, pp.236-241.
Brownell, K.D. & Frieden, T.R., 2009. Ounces of prevention—the public policy case for taxes on sugared beverages. **New England Journal of Medicine**, 360(18), pp.1805-1808.
Drewnowski, A. & Specter, S.E., 2004. Poverty and obesity: the role of energy density and energy costs. **American Journal of Clinical Nutrition**, 79(1), pp.6-16.
Krieger, J.W., Chan, N.L., Saelens, B.E., Ta, M.L., Solet, D. & Fleming, D.W., 2013. Menu labeling regulations and calories purchased at chain restaurants. **American Journal of Preventive Medicine**, 44(6), pp.595-604.
Ogden, C.L., Carroll, M.D., Kit, B.K. & Flegal, K.M., 2014. Prevalence of childhood and adult obesity in the United States, 2011-2012. **JAMA**, 311(8), pp.806-814.
Smith, L.P., Ng, S.W. & Popkin, B.M., 2013. Trends in US home food preparation and consumption: analysis of national nutrition surveys and time use studies from 1965-1966 to 2007-2008. **Nutrition Journal**, 12(1), p.45.
Stephens, J. & Allen, J., 2013. Mobile phone interventions to increase physical activity and reduce weight: a systematic review. **Journal of Cardiovascular Nursing**, 28(4), pp.320-329.
Story, M., Kaphingst, K.M., Robinson-O'Brien, R. & Glanz, K., 2008. Creating healthy food and eating environments: policy and environmental approaches. **Annual Review of Public Health**, 29, pp.253-272.
Walker, R.E., Keane, C.R. & Burke, J.G., 2010. Disparities and access to healthy food in the United States: A review of food deserts literature. **Health & Place**, 16(5), pp.876-884.
Young, L.R. & Nestle, M., 2002. The contribution of expanding portion sizes to the US obesity epidemic. **American Journal of Public Health**, 92(2), pp.246-249.
Fulkerson, J.A., Story, M., Neumark-Sztainer, D. & Rydell, S., 2008. Family meals: Perceptions of benefits and challenges among parents of 8-to 10-year-old children. **Journal of the American Dietetic Association**, 108(4), pp.706-709.
Huang, T.T.K., Drewnowski, A., Kumanyika, S.K. & Glass, T.A., 2009. A systems-oriented multilevel framework for addressing obesity in the 21st century. **Preventing Chronic Disease**, 6(3), A82.
Kumanyika, S.K., 2008. Environmental influences on childhood obesity: Ethnic and cultural influences in context. **Physician and Sportsmedicine**, 36(1), pp.45-51.
Larson, N.I., Story, M.T. & Nelson, M.C., 2009. Neighborhood environments: Disparities in access to healthy foods in the US. **American Journal of Preventive Medicine**, 36(1), pp.74-81.
Ludwig, D.S. & Pollack, H.A., 2009. Obesity and the economy: from crisis to opportunity. **JAMA**, 301(5), pp.533-535.
Powell, L.M., Chaloupka, F.J. & Bao, Y., 2007. The availability of fast-food and full-service restaurants in the United States: associations with neighborhood characteristics. **American Journal of Preventive Medicine**, 33(4), pp.S240-S245.
Sallis, J.F., Floyd, M.F., Rodríguez, D.A. & Saelens, B.E., 2012. Role of built environments in physical activity, obesity, and cardiovascular disease. **Circulation**, 125(5), pp.729-737.
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IntroductionThe rise of fast food chains in the United States from 2000 to 2010 had an impact on both the culture and economy. This period saw an increase in obesity rates among Americans, which coincided with the growth of these eateries. In this essay we delve into the connection between the expansion of fast food franchises and the obesity epidemic examining factors that influence health. Through an analysis of data, health studies and relevant literature our goal is to provide an understanding of how consuming food has played a role in fueling obesity during this particular decade, in America.The Growth of Fast Food Chains
Between 2000 and 2010 there was a rise in the fast food industry. Popular chains such as McDonalds, Burger King and Subway expanded their reach by opening stores to meet the demand for budget friendly meals. Data from the U.S. Census Bureau shows that the number of fast food eateries increased by around 20% during this timeframe (U.S. Census Bureau, 2011). This expansion made fast food more convenient for a range of people, including kids and teenagers.
Obesity Trends in the U.S. (2000 2010)
The prevalence of obesity in America has been on a trajectory during the early years of the 21st century. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) the rate of obesity among adults rose from 30.5% in 2000 to 35.7% in 2010 (CDC, 2011). Similarly among children and teens aged between 2 and 19 years old obesity rates increased from 13.9% to 16.9% over that period. This continuous increase signals a concerning public health issue with impacts on illness rates, mortality rates and healthcare expenses.
The Impact of Fast Food, on Eating Habits
food is commonly known for its levels of calories, excessive saturated fats, sugars and sodium with little nutritional value. These aspects of food are closely associated with weight gain and obesity. Studies show that regular consumption of food is linked to consuming calories and maintaining poor eating habits (Bowman & Vineyard 2004). Research conducted by Pereira et al. (2005) revealed that individuals who ate food than twice a week were more likely to gain weight and develop insulin resistance compared to those who consumed it less frequently.
Influence of Socioeconomic Factors
The easy availability and affordability of food make it an attractive option for people with incomes. Fast food establishments are often concentrated in low income areas where residents have limited access to dining choices (Powell et al. 2007). This situation, referred to as "food deserts " , worsens the issue of obesity because disadvantaged groups tend to rely on food as their main source of nutrition.
Impact of Advertising and Promotion
The aggressive advertising tactics used by fast food companies also have a significant influence on eating behaviors particularly among young individuals, like children and teenagers.
Many businesses invest sums of money each year in marketing showcasing their products across platforms, like TV, the web and social networks. Kids are especially influenced by these strategies that highlight the appeal and ease of food reinforcing harmful dietary patterns early on.
The impact of obesity, on health is significant and variedObesity is a factor in chronic illnesses like type 2 diabetes, heart disease, stroke and certain cancers (Flegal et al., 2012). The rise in obesity rates has led to an increase in health issues putting a strain on the healthcare system. The financial implications of obesity are also noteworthy with studies indicating that medical costs linked to obesity made up around 10% of healthcare expenses in the United States during that time (Cawley & Meyerhoefer 2012).
Policies and public health effortsIn response to the escalating obesity crisis, different policies and public health efforts have been put into action at state and local levels. These initiatives aim to encourage eating habits through measures like food labeling requirements, restrictions on advertising foods to children and campaigns raising awareness about the risks of obesity (Koplan et al., 2007). Schools have been a point for intervention well, with endeavors to enhance the nutritional value of school meals and boost physical activity among students.ExamplesVarious real life examples and stories showcase the effectiveness of taking action to address the issue of obesity. For example, New York City put in place a set of strategies to combat obesity, such as displaying calorie information on menus and prohibiting trans fats in restaurant dishes. These initiatives led to improvements in people's eating habits and a slight decrease in obesity levels, within the community (Dumanovsky et al. 2011).ChallengesThe obesity epidemic still poses challenges despite the efforts to address it. Unhealthy eating habits deeply ingrained in society, the presence of the fast food industry and disparities in status all add layers of complexity to this issue. Moving forward it is crucial to focus on creating an environment that encourages choices for vulnerable communities. This entails advocating for policies that restrict the marketing of foods to children, enhancing access to options in low income areas and urging food companies to improve the health profile of their products.
Psychological marketingWhen it comes to food marketing companies go beyond advertising tactics by leveraging deep rooted psychological triggers that influence consumer behavior. Bright colors, catchy tunes and recognizable mascots are commonly used in food ads to build a memorable brand image. This technique is particularly effective with audiences like children and teenagers who're more susceptible and likely to develop lasting brand loyalties. Research indicates that exposure to these advertisements can lead children to prefer calorie, nutrient foods ultimately impacting their dietary decisions and contributing to weight gain (Boyland & Halford 2013).The impact of portion sizes
One overlooked but significant factor contributing to the obesity crisis is the increasing sizes of portions served by food chains. Over time portion sizes have substantially grown, with meals exceeding the recommended calorie intake for a single meal. Young and Nestles (2002) study reveals that fast food item portions have expanded over the years with some items now more than double their size. This phenomenon of "portion distortion" results in calorie consumption as individuals tend to eat when faced with larger servings often underestimating the actual caloric content.
Changes in lifestyle and time constraints
The contemporary way of life characterized by schedules and time limitations has also played a role in the heightened dependence on fast food. With an increase in dual income households and longer work hours many people find themselves lacking the time to cook meals. Fast food emerges as a solution offering cost effective options that align with busy routines. Nonetheless this convenience comes at a price as frequent consumption of food is linked to dietary patterns and increased calorie intake contributing to the surge in obesity rates (Smith, Ng & Popkin 2013).Another significant measure involves restricting the promotion of foods to children. By reducing kids exposure to food ads policymakers aim to lessen the impact of marketing on their eating habits. Some cities have also imposed taxes on beverages and unhealthy foods in an effort to discourage consumption through penalties. While the effectiveness of these strategies may vary they mark progress in combating the obesity crisis.
Approaches Rooted in Communities
Community based strategies for addressing obesity highlight the importance of initiatives and grassroots movements. Programs that concentrate on enhancing access to foods encouraging activity and educating community members about healthy eating have shown positive outcomes. For example community gardens and farmers markets can offer produce to residents living in areas with access to healthy food options promoting better dietary choices. Schools and community centers can also play a role by providing nutrition education and physical activity programs.
The Impact of Technology
Technology has increasingly become an asset in the battle against obesity. Mobile applications and wearable gadgets enable individuals to monitor their calorie intake and exercise levels offering feedback and motivating lifestyle choices.
Furthermore social networking sites can play a role, in advocating for public health initiatives and sharing details on diet and wellness. Although technology isn't a solution to the issue of obesity it provides avenues to involve people and groups in embracing healthier habits (Stephens & Allen 2013).
Future Directions and Recommendations
The approach to tackling obesity needs to be multi-faceted and should involve collaboration between government departments, health workers, local communities, as well as the food industry. In future, there is need for more efforts in creating an atmosphere that supports healthier selections particularly among the disadvantaged groups. This means that one should continue to campaign for policies aimed at reducing children’s exposure to unhealthy food advertisements, improving availability of healthy foods in deprived neighborhoods and encouraging manufacturers in the food sector to change their products into a healthier version.
Further still public health campaigns will try and focus on having balanced diets regularly done exercises. Schools and offices can succeed by developing well-structured meals alongside opportunities for exercising. More research is also needed to understand why some people are poor eaters or overweight than others.
Policy Proposals
To further combat the menace of overweight, policy makers should think about enacting a variety of evidence-based strategies. Some of them could be: Sugar-Sweetened Beverage Taxes: Taxes on sugary drinks can decrease consumption and raise funds for public health projects. Zoning Regulations: By controlling the number of fast food restaurants in given areas, intake will subside and encourage establishment of grocery stores among other healthier alternatives.Menu Labeling Laws: This makes sure that restaurants indicate calorie counts as well as other nutritional information to assist customers in making informed choices. School Nutrition Standards: Schools meals and snacks in the course of learning ought to meet recommended nutrition levels so that students are eating healthy. Addressing Behavioral FactorsBehavioral interventions also play a significant role in dealing with obesity. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and other psychological approaches aid individuals to develop better eating habits and deal with triggers involved in overeating. Programs addressing weight control which incorporate behavior change counseling together with diet and exercise components show promise towards helping individuals achieve successful long term weight loss.Long-Term Commitment and Sustainable Change
Society must collectively make a commitment that will last over a long period to reduce obesity rates. The approach should be ongoing and flexible enough to accommodate changing circumstances and new information. For this change to be lasting, there must be continuous investment in public health infrastructure, research, and education. Therefore, significant strides can be achieved in reducing obesity rates by nurturing a culture that appreciates wellness.
Cultural Shifts and Public Perception
In addressing the obesity epidemic another critical factor is shifting public opinion as well as cultural norms with regards to food and health. The acceptance of fast food and oversize portions as normative has been one of the major drivers towards unhealthy eating habits over the past few decades. This would involve public health campaigns focused on what constitutes healthy balanced meals and promoting on good home cooked fresh meal benefits instead. To change public perception cooking classes nutrition workshops media campaign advertising preparation advantages of healthy meals at home for instance.
Strengthening Health Care Interventions
Routine screenings, counseling and support for weight management by health care providers are crucial in handling obesity. Obesity prevention and treatment should be integrated into primary care to ensure consistency and comprehensiveness in people’s health. Personalized advice can be availed by the healthcare practitioners and also set realistic targets as well as referring patients to dietitians or structured weight loss programs.
Advancing Research and Use of Proven Practices
To better understand the intricate contributors to obesity and curate effective interventions, it is important to sustain research. Longitudinal studies that follow diet patterns, activity levels, and disease outcomes offer useful information on how to prevent or reduce obesity. By exploring behavioral, environmental and genetic factors that affect obesity, this will enable us to make interventions that are specific for different populations and situations as well.
Conclusion
The period between 2000 and 2010 registered a sharp increase of obesity rates that is closely linked to the spread of fast food outlets across America. This public health menace can only be fought with multidimensional approaches that will change public attitude, improve education, enhance corporate accountability and support inclusive research plus health care interventions. By creating an environment where good health is appreciated through provision of necessary resources and support, we can achieve significant milestones in curbing cases of obesity within our population as well as overall improvement in their welfare.
Citations:
Boyland, E.J. & Halford, J.C.G., 2013. Television advertising and branding. Effects on eating behavior and food preferences in children. **Appetite**, 62, pp.236-241.
Brownell, K.D. & Frieden, T.R., 2009. Ounces of prevention—the public policy case for taxes on sugared beverages. **New England Journal of Medicine**, 360(18), pp.1805-1808.
Drewnowski, A. & Specter, S.E., 2004. Poverty and obesity: the role of energy density and energy costs. **American Journal of Clinical Nutrition**, 79(1), pp.6-16.
Krieger, J.W., Chan, N.L., Saelens, B.E., Ta, M.L., Solet, D. & Fleming, D.W., 2013. Menu labeling regulations and calories purchased at chain restaurants. **American Journal of Preventive Medicine**, 44(6), pp.595-604.
Ogden, C.L., Carroll, M.D., Kit, B.K. & Flegal, K.M., 2014. Prevalence of childhood and adult obesity in the United States, 2011-2012. **JAMA**, 311(8), pp.806-814.
Smith, L.P., Ng, S.W. & Popkin, B.M., 2013. Trends in US home food preparation and consumption: analysis of national nutrition surveys and time use studies from 1965-1966 to 2007-2008. **Nutrition Journal**, 12(1), p.45.
Stephens, J. & Allen, J., 2013. Mobile phone interventions to increase physical activity and reduce weight: a systematic review. **Journal of Cardiovascular Nursing**, 28(4), pp.320-329.
Story, M., Kaphingst, K.M., Robinson-O'Brien, R. & Glanz, K., 2008. Creating healthy food and eating environments: policy and environmental approaches. **Annual Review of Public Health**, 29, pp.253-272.
Walker, R.E., Keane, C.R. & Burke, J.G., 2010. Disparities and access to healthy food in the United States: A review of food deserts literature. **Health & Place**, 16(5), pp.876-884.
Young, L.R. & Nestle, M., 2002. The contribution of expanding portion sizes to the US obesity epidemic. **American Journal of Public Health**, 92(2), pp.246-249.
Fulkerson, J.A., Story, M., Neumark-Sztainer, D. & Rydell, S., 2008. Family meals: Perceptions of benefits and challenges among parents of 8-to 10-year-old children. **Journal of the American Dietetic Association**, 108(4), pp.706-709.
Huang, T.T.K., Drewnowski, A., Kumanyika, S.K. & Glass, T.A., 2009. A systems-oriented multilevel framework for addressing obesity in the 21st century. **Preventing Chronic Disease**, 6(3), A82.
Kumanyika, S.K., 2008. Environmental influences on childhood obesity: Ethnic and cultural influences in context. **Physician and Sportsmedicine**, 36(1), pp.45-51.
Larson, N.I., Story, M.T. & Nelson, M.C., 2009. Neighborhood environments: Disparities in access to healthy foods in the US. **American Journal of Preventive Medicine**, 36(1), pp.74-81.
Ludwig, D.S. & Pollack, H.A., 2009. Obesity and the economy: from crisis to opportunity. **JAMA**, 301(5), pp.533-535.
Powell, L.M., Chaloupka, F.J. & Bao, Y., 2007. The availability of fast-food and full-service restaurants in the United States: associations with neighborhood characteristics. **American Journal of Preventive Medicine**, 33(4), pp.S240-S245.
Sallis, J.F., Floyd, M.F., Rodríguez, D.A. & Saelens, B.E., 2012. Role of built environments in physical activity, obesity, and cardiovascular disease. **Circulation**, 125(5), pp.729-737.
2024.05.18 17:44 Groundbreaking_Mess3 Using M3 year + dedicated to effectively prepare for Step 2 CK (277)
I benefitted a lot from the advice on this subreddit and used a lot of it to guide my approach to M3 year; now that I've had the chance to sit the exam, I wanted to create an exam write-up in the hopes that it will be useful to others. This write-up is lengthy, as I wanted to include advice for any new M3 students about how to maximize 3rd year, as well as some Step 2-specific strategies and advice.
A little about me: I am a non-traditional student (in my 30s) at a mid-tier US MD school. Pre-clinical grades were good (honored 2nd year, 0.5% away from honoring 1st year). Honored every rotation in 3rd year. I am a peer tutor at my medical school and was actively involved in tutoring 1st and 2nd year students throughout my M3 year and dedicated.
I am a big believer in students teaching students and the idea that if we all work together, we all become better students and clinicians. In that spirit, I welcome you to ask me any questions that you have below.
I am a big believer that the most effective study strategy involves four big components:
A lot of people I know use AMBOSS and like it. Some people want an additional bank of questions to study from. I didn't personally use AMBOSS at all during 3rd year, and only used it for Ethics and QI during dedicated (and honestly, it was only marginally useful - may have gotten me 1 or 2 extra points on the real step 2 exam, but not more than that).
I think the smartest way to approach Q-banks is to make sure you have enough time to complete and thoroughly review at least one. For me, UWorld was more than enough to prepare well for each shelf exam and step 2 (honored every rotation). I think that a lot of people who try to use both AMBOSS and UWorld never finish either Q-bank in its entirety, or don't really review the Q-bank adequately. I decided it was a better use of my time and money to review only one but really know it well.
A note on Anki
Anki is a powerful tool that can really help with your long term retention, but it is dangerous if used incorrectly. I suspect that many people who don't find Anki helpful simply don't use it effectively.
The purpose of Anki is spaced repetition. In order for this to work, you have to keep up with reviews and you can't pause cards. I also caution students I tutor to be cautious of relying solely on a premade Anki deck; I used the AnKing deck, as well as this deck and a home-brew deck at my medical school.
During M3 year, I would start each rotation with UWorld from day 1, and as I came across each concept in UWorld, I would do a search through my Anki cards and unpause all the cards that related to that topic (so, for instance, when I got a question about diverculitis, I would then unpause all the diverticulitis cards). I found that doing this ensured that the new Anki cards I was adding were reviews of concepts I had just studied (via UWorld), so I was able to both reinforce the new content via Anki and also ensure that the new Anki cards I was adding were concepts that I was actually familiar with. I recommended this approach over the one that I saw many classmates using (just unpausing all the cards tagged for a clerkship at the start of the clerkship and "raw dogging" them, as my friend put it). It's also a good way to keep your daily new cards (and thus, your reviews) at a manageable number. On a typical day in 3rd year, I added between 50-100 new cards and averaged 250-350 reviews daily. I was nearly always able to complete my reviews while I was at the hospital each day, leaving my home study time free for UWorld.
More on how to effectively use Anki
A note on staying sane and prioritizing high-yield content
As others have said, I think that the best way to do extremely well on Step 2 CK is to approach M3 as a yearlong dedicated period. Doing well on Step 2 is not just about your preparation for the Step 2 exam, but also your learning during each rotation and your preparation for your shelf exams. Even if you're not at all interested in a particular specialty, there is a lot to learn from each rotation that will be valuable to you as a future physician. Additionally, each specialty has its own way of approaching medical decision-making, and paying attention to these patterns of thought can help you to reason through questions on exams, as well as be a better communicator with physicians in each specialty when you become a resident and attending.
As you progress through 3rd year, there are also a few things that I think it's wise to keep in mind:
For all rotations, my strategy was generally:
I did my rotations in the order listed below and I really liked this order. I know many people advocate for finishing on Internal Medicine, but I was very glad I started with it, because I think it laid a strong foundation for everything else. As long as you have a solid strategy for reviewing the IM content continuously throughout the year, I think it's a smart choice for the first rotation, especially because basically every other shelf exam will have 5-10 IM questions on it.
Medicine
Resources: UWorld (IM shelf bank + 1/2 of Ambulatory), Case Files Internal Medicine (did ~50% of it), USPSTF A & B guidelines, NBME practice shelf exams ("CMS forms"), Emma Holliday review
Advice: If you have free time 1-2 weeks before starting IM, get through as much of Case Files as you can. It lays a good base and helps you get into the mindset of IM. Once you start the rotation, crank through UWorld. I'd suggest trying to finish the UWorld Q's with 1-2 weeks to spare at the end of the clerkship in which you can review incorrects and/or shore up any weak areas.
Raw Score: 85
Neurology
Resources: UWorld, Case Files: Neurology, NBME practice shelf exams ("CMS forms")
Advice: Case Files Neuro is a little in the weeds, but it will help a lot with some of the more off-the-wall pathologies that aren't really seen in the UWorld bank.
Raw Score: 90
Psychiatry
Resources: UWorld, Case Files: Psych, NBME practice shelf exams ("CMS forms"). A lot of people swear by First Aid for the Psychiatry Clerkship; I didn't use it (but I think Case Files accomplished much the same purpose)
Advice: Pay attention to timelines + enjoy the psychation! This is the lightest rotation for most people. Take it in the summer if at all possible and enjoy the nice weather and free time. If you can, get it somewhere in the middle of 3rd year so you can have a little break.
Raw Score: 94
Family Medicine
Resources: UWorld (FM bank + 1/2 of ambulatory bank), Case Files: Family Med, NBME practice shelf exams ("CMS forms"), USPSTF A & B guidelines, CDC vaccination schedules
Advice: Try to take FM after IM, if at all possible. DO NOT underestimate the family medicine shelf exam. It is the broadest shelf exam, and it's heavily weighted towards prevention, so plan your studying accordingly. Know the USPSTF guidelines and vaccine schedules like the back of your hand (this is at least 25-30% of the shelf exam).
Raw Score: 85
Surgery
Resources: UWorld (Surgery bank + EM bank), de Virgilio's Surgery, NBME practice shelf exams ("CMS forms") for EM and Surgery, American College of Surgeons TEAM (Trauma Evaluation and Management) course book, Emma Holliday review
Advice: The surgery shelf exam focuses heavily on the pre- and post-surgical management of surgical patients, trauma assessment (hence the EM questions/CMS forms above), and knowing the indications for surgery. You will not be asked how to do a surgery on the shelf exam, but you will be expected to know when a surgery is indicated vs when medical management should be used instead (and also what that medical management is). De Virgilio's is a great and under-utilized resource that has a fantastic question bank at the end of each chapter. I would recommend reading at least the GI, vascular, breast, endocrine, and trauma sections (and honestly, as much of it as you have time for).
Raw Score: 85
Obstetrics and Gynecology
Resources: UWorld, Case Files: OBGYN, NBME practice shelf exams ("CMS forms"), ACOG guidelines, UWise questions
Advice: OBGYN is all about timelines (at least, the OB part is). Pay attention to gestational age requirements for diagnosis of various conditions. Know the various labs that are used to diagnose Pre-eclampsia with severe features, and really pay attention to risk factors for the various obstetric complications. As one nurse midwife I worked with put it, "The biggest risk factor anything in L & D is usually a history of the same complication". I didn't really find the UWise Q-bank that useful, but if you have extra time, it's a nice source of extra practice questions, or a good way to reinforce any trouble spots.
Raw Score: 87
Pediatrics
Resources: UWorld, Case Files: Pediatrics, NBME practice shelf exams ("CMS forms"), CDC vaccination schedule, Emma Holliday review
Advice: Know the general trends of pediatric vital signs (what's normal for an adult is abnormal for most pediatric patients and vice versa), pay attention to rashes and dermatology, and review these as often as possible. It's well worth your time to do a good review of all the glycogen storage diseases, inborn errors of metabolism, lysosomal storage diseases, etc that you forgot after Step 1. For this reason, if you can do Peds as your last rotation before Step 2 it's kind of nice...then you only have to re-learn all this stuff once. This stuff is fair game for Step 2 (and I did personally get questions on it on my exam).
Raw Score: 91
My main resources during dedicated were NBME practice exams (I did 8-14 timed), UWSAs, and the Free 120. I also listened to some Divine Intervention episodes on my runs and reviewed the Emma Holliday shelf exam reviews (I had previously listened to these during my M3 rotations). Of the podcasts, I found the Divine Intervention Free 120 review the most helpful, and would strongly recommend listening to those episodes after you take the Free 120. It did a lot to help me with some test taking strategies that I used on exam day.
General advice for dedicated:
CCSE: 254 (my school requires this, and it was given a few days after the final shelf exam, right at the start of my dedicated period)
NBME 9 (30 days out) 269
NBME 10 (21 days out) 268
NBME 11 (18 days out) 262
NBME 12 (15 days out) 251
NBME 13 (7 days out) 264
NBME 14 (2 days out) 264
UWSA 1 (25 days out) 254
UWSA 2 (9 days out) 268
UWSA 3 (5 days out) 266
New Free 120 (3 days out) 85%
Predicted score: 265
Of course, I ended up tossing and turning most of the night and slept very poorly. When I woke up, I considered trying to postpone my test, but ultimately I decided I just wanted it over and done with and I wasn't willing to wait any longer. My point here is that even if you have anxiety and/or a single bad night of sleep before the exam, you can still do very well if you've done the work. As we say in the marathon world, trust your training.
During the exam, I took a break of at least 5 min after every block. Personally, I found the mental break was extremely helpful. On the whole, I found the exam to be quite reasonable.
Step 2 CK: 277
My last piece of advice will be that I think doing well throughout third year is the best thing you can do. If you've had a break after 3rd year or you are an IMG or someone coming from a non-traditional program, doing a thorough content review with the CMS forms before starting Step 2 specific practice exams is a good idea.
Ultimately, I think the most important things are:
1.) Choosing a FEW, QUALITY resources to review
2.) Continuing your ACTIVE, CONTINUOUS review strategy
3.) Keeping a consistent schedule with time for sleep, healthy eating, exercise, and something you find fun (ideally something other than TV).
4.) Staying off Reddit. Really, I mean it. Especially during dedicated, it's just a black hole of anxiety and angst and you should avoid it at all costs. Come back after you get your amazing scores and pay it forward to others.
submitted by Groundbreaking_Mess3 to Step2 [link] [comments]
A little about me: I am a non-traditional student (in my 30s) at a mid-tier US MD school. Pre-clinical grades were good (honored 2nd year, 0.5% away from honoring 1st year). Honored every rotation in 3rd year. I am a peer tutor at my medical school and was actively involved in tutoring 1st and 2nd year students throughout my M3 year and dedicated.
I am a big believer in students teaching students and the idea that if we all work together, we all become better students and clinicians. In that spirit, I welcome you to ask me any questions that you have below.
Overview
In general, my advice boils down to:- Don't try to use EVERY resource. Choose a few high-quality resources and really know them well.
- Doing well on Step 2 (and shelf exams, tbh) requires active learning strategies and continually trying to think about what the next step would be. Practice questions are a great way to do this, but challenge yourself to go beyond what each individual question to build a broader knowledge base. That way, you won't only know the answer to that specific question, but also to a whole host of related questions.
I am a big believer that the most effective study strategy involves four big components:
- A question bank (UWorld) - gives you primary exposure to the material and helps to identify where your gaps are.
- A system for continuously reviewing content - I used Anki (I discuss this more below). You can also use other strategies (note-taking, old school flash cards), but the important thing is that your review strategy needs to be ACTIVE (i.e., not just re-reading your old notes, but actively quizzing yourself and covering up the answers) and it needs to be CONTINUOUS. I did not pause any Anki cards during 3rd year, so by the time I got to dedicated, I had been actively, continuously reviewing content for months.
- Resource(s) for primary sources - this is where you go when you need to refresh on pathophysiology, look up treatment/diagnostic testing for a disease, or understand the symptoms. I prefer UpToDate for this broadly, and used some additional resources on specific clerkships that I will discuss below.
- Practice exams - NBME practice shelf exams ("CMS forms") and NBME Step 2 practice exams; do them timed to practice pacing.
A lot of people I know use AMBOSS and like it. Some people want an additional bank of questions to study from. I didn't personally use AMBOSS at all during 3rd year, and only used it for Ethics and QI during dedicated (and honestly, it was only marginally useful - may have gotten me 1 or 2 extra points on the real step 2 exam, but not more than that).
I think the smartest way to approach Q-banks is to make sure you have enough time to complete and thoroughly review at least one. For me, UWorld was more than enough to prepare well for each shelf exam and step 2 (honored every rotation). I think that a lot of people who try to use both AMBOSS and UWorld never finish either Q-bank in its entirety, or don't really review the Q-bank adequately. I decided it was a better use of my time and money to review only one but really know it well.
A note on Anki
Anki is a powerful tool that can really help with your long term retention, but it is dangerous if used incorrectly. I suspect that many people who don't find Anki helpful simply don't use it effectively.
The purpose of Anki is spaced repetition. In order for this to work, you have to keep up with reviews and you can't pause cards. I also caution students I tutor to be cautious of relying solely on a premade Anki deck; I used the AnKing deck, as well as this deck and a home-brew deck at my medical school.
During M3 year, I would start each rotation with UWorld from day 1, and as I came across each concept in UWorld, I would do a search through my Anki cards and unpause all the cards that related to that topic (so, for instance, when I got a question about diverculitis, I would then unpause all the diverticulitis cards). I found that doing this ensured that the new Anki cards I was adding were reviews of concepts I had just studied (via UWorld), so I was able to both reinforce the new content via Anki and also ensure that the new Anki cards I was adding were concepts that I was actually familiar with. I recommended this approach over the one that I saw many classmates using (just unpausing all the cards tagged for a clerkship at the start of the clerkship and "raw dogging" them, as my friend put it). It's also a good way to keep your daily new cards (and thus, your reviews) at a manageable number. On a typical day in 3rd year, I added between 50-100 new cards and averaged 250-350 reviews daily. I was nearly always able to complete my reviews while I was at the hospital each day, leaving my home study time free for UWorld.
More on how to effectively use Anki
A note on staying sane and prioritizing high-yield content
As others have said, I think that the best way to do extremely well on Step 2 CK is to approach M3 as a yearlong dedicated period. Doing well on Step 2 is not just about your preparation for the Step 2 exam, but also your learning during each rotation and your preparation for your shelf exams. Even if you're not at all interested in a particular specialty, there is a lot to learn from each rotation that will be valuable to you as a future physician. Additionally, each specialty has its own way of approaching medical decision-making, and paying attention to these patterns of thought can help you to reason through questions on exams, as well as be a better communicator with physicians in each specialty when you become a resident and attending.
As you progress through 3rd year, there are also a few things that I think it's wise to keep in mind:
- Remember that you are a person first and a medical student/doctor second. I put this first because it's the most important. It's hard to learn when your basic needs aren't being met or you're so anxious, stressed, or depressed you can't remember anything. Find something that keeps you grounded and whole and sane and make that a priority. For me, it's distance running. I ran nearly every day of 3rd year and dedicated (often at 3 AM, before rounds). I finished 3 marathons during M3 and dedicated, including running the Boston Marathon 2 weeks before I took step 2. Running relieves anxiety, gives me an excuse to step away from studying, and evens out my mood. In total, I ran over 2500 miles during my M3 year. I don't think I would have done anywhere near as well in M3 without it.
- Get really, really good at preventive care. The US Preventive Services Task Force guidelines are highly tested on all shelf exams and on Step 2, and there really aren't that many of them. Before my family med rotation, I made an Anki deck of the A and B recommendations based on the most recent updates and kept those in rotation through Step 2 (about 150 cards total). If you're at the beginning of M3 year, (or really any point in M3) I would suggest doing this right now. Every time you see a patient in clinic, think about "what screening exams should this patient have". If you get in the habit of always doing this, by the time you get to the exam, those screening questions will be free points (and there are usually a bunch of them).
- Try to approach every patient encounter as though you are the sole physician responsible for that patient's care. Formulate your own plan independently of residents or attendings. Ask questions about all these things in your patient interview, and present the answers to your attending. You will learn more if you push yourself to try to think about management from the beginning of 3rd year rather than relying on plans from your residents.
- Pay attention to sensitivity and specificity of tests. This is becoming a bigger and bigger deal on NBMEs and Step 2. Knowing sensitivity and specificity can help you determine whether a given finding in a question stem is significant or not.
- Look up every imaging test and diagnostic procedure you come across, whether in clinic or on a practice exam. A good rule of thumb for whether you understand a test is "Do I know when this test is appropriate, when it is inappropriate, and could I explain it to a patient?". I had a surgery fellow pimp me on when to order an ERCP vs MRCP; this stuff is important because it prevents unnecessary testing and allows you to get the most "bang for your buck", both in terms of diagnostic accuracy and scoring points on the "next step" questions on exams.
- Pay attention to thresholds for follow-up observation vs treatment. If a patient has a AAA that's 3 cm, you do serial ultrasounds and watch it clinically; if it's 7 cm, you operate. Many, many conditions have similar thresholds, and you should look for the differences in how you manage a condition based on the thresholds. Sometimes this stuff is buried in the UWorld explanations, so when you see it, make a flash card or add it to your review.
- Know the USPSTF screening guidelines like the back of your hand. There aren't that many of them, and it's basically free points on every single shelf exam + step 2. Make a flash card deck with the most updated versions on day 1 and review it throughout 3rd year. Especially high yield on FM + IM, but they appear on every shelf.
- Think about what things a specialty "cares about" when you're rotating on that specialty.
- OBGYN: gestational age, STI history/screening, social/fam Hx of risk factors for gyn cancers (breast, cervical, ovarian, endometrial).
- Surgery: is the patient safe to take to surgery (comorbidities, heart failure, coagulopathies, meds, etc)? When is surgery indicated (i.e., do they have to go now, or can they wait)? Antibiotic prophylaxis (who needs it, and what antibiotics)? Post-op complications (the "5 W's", leaks, nearby structures that can be injured)? Normal post-op care/patient safety (DVT prophylaxis, catheter removal, infections, etc).
- Peds: developmental milestones/normal development/growth curves, rashes (pediatricians love rashes), upper respiratory infections, stuff that gets treated differently in kids (ex. febrile UTI), neonatal hyperbilirubinemia (basically guaranteed to get at least one question on this on any peds exam)
- IM: Preventive care/screening, vaccines, hypertension, diabetes, heart failure, ACS, liver failure/cirrhosis.
- FM: IM + Peds + OBGYN, with a heavy focus on preventive screenings
- Psych: Pay attention to timelines; think of every psych disease as a continuum (i.e., <1 mo = brief psychotic disorder, 1-6 mo = schizophreniform, 6+ = schizophrenia, schizophrenia + mood symptoms = schizophreniform). Find something that makes sense to you for the personality disorders (I personally mapped them all onto Harry Potter characters and now I will never have to re-learn them).
- Neuro: Differentiating causes of stroke, multiple sclerosis, when to get an MRI (answer: always get an MRI in neuro), different types of dementia
Subject Review
This section is intended for those who are starting or still in the midst of M3 year. If you're already in dedicated, this section may be less useful.For all rotations, my strategy was generally:
- Complete the UWorld Shelf exam Q-bank with 1-2 weeks to spare
- Make/unpause Anki cards as I worked through UWorld
- Take timed NBME practice shelf exams regularly throughout the rotation(I sat down at the start of each rotation and planned these out every 1-2 weeks so they were evenly spaced throughout the rotation). Get through every practice exam by the end of the rotation. Doing them timed is important because it helps you to practice pacing. One 50-question exam at 90 seconds/ question = 75 minutes total. I also wrote down the diagnosis for each question so that when I reviewed the exam, I could see whether any wrong answers were a problem with making the wrong diagnosis vs knowing the next step. Doing the NBME shelf exams also gives you a good sense of what the "pet concepts" that tend to occur over and over are (for instance, SCFE vs Legg-Calve-Perthes comes up shockingly often)
I did my rotations in the order listed below and I really liked this order. I know many people advocate for finishing on Internal Medicine, but I was very glad I started with it, because I think it laid a strong foundation for everything else. As long as you have a solid strategy for reviewing the IM content continuously throughout the year, I think it's a smart choice for the first rotation, especially because basically every other shelf exam will have 5-10 IM questions on it.
Medicine
Resources: UWorld (IM shelf bank + 1/2 of Ambulatory), Case Files Internal Medicine (did ~50% of it), USPSTF A & B guidelines, NBME practice shelf exams ("CMS forms"), Emma Holliday review
Advice: If you have free time 1-2 weeks before starting IM, get through as much of Case Files as you can. It lays a good base and helps you get into the mindset of IM. Once you start the rotation, crank through UWorld. I'd suggest trying to finish the UWorld Q's with 1-2 weeks to spare at the end of the clerkship in which you can review incorrects and/or shore up any weak areas.
Raw Score: 85
Neurology
Resources: UWorld, Case Files: Neurology, NBME practice shelf exams ("CMS forms")
Advice: Case Files Neuro is a little in the weeds, but it will help a lot with some of the more off-the-wall pathologies that aren't really seen in the UWorld bank.
Raw Score: 90
Psychiatry
Resources: UWorld, Case Files: Psych, NBME practice shelf exams ("CMS forms"). A lot of people swear by First Aid for the Psychiatry Clerkship; I didn't use it (but I think Case Files accomplished much the same purpose)
Advice: Pay attention to timelines + enjoy the psychation! This is the lightest rotation for most people. Take it in the summer if at all possible and enjoy the nice weather and free time. If you can, get it somewhere in the middle of 3rd year so you can have a little break.
Raw Score: 94
Family Medicine
Resources: UWorld (FM bank + 1/2 of ambulatory bank), Case Files: Family Med, NBME practice shelf exams ("CMS forms"), USPSTF A & B guidelines, CDC vaccination schedules
Advice: Try to take FM after IM, if at all possible. DO NOT underestimate the family medicine shelf exam. It is the broadest shelf exam, and it's heavily weighted towards prevention, so plan your studying accordingly. Know the USPSTF guidelines and vaccine schedules like the back of your hand (this is at least 25-30% of the shelf exam).
Raw Score: 85
Surgery
Resources: UWorld (Surgery bank + EM bank), de Virgilio's Surgery, NBME practice shelf exams ("CMS forms") for EM and Surgery, American College of Surgeons TEAM (Trauma Evaluation and Management) course book, Emma Holliday review
Advice: The surgery shelf exam focuses heavily on the pre- and post-surgical management of surgical patients, trauma assessment (hence the EM questions/CMS forms above), and knowing the indications for surgery. You will not be asked how to do a surgery on the shelf exam, but you will be expected to know when a surgery is indicated vs when medical management should be used instead (and also what that medical management is). De Virgilio's is a great and under-utilized resource that has a fantastic question bank at the end of each chapter. I would recommend reading at least the GI, vascular, breast, endocrine, and trauma sections (and honestly, as much of it as you have time for).
Raw Score: 85
Obstetrics and Gynecology
Resources: UWorld, Case Files: OBGYN, NBME practice shelf exams ("CMS forms"), ACOG guidelines, UWise questions
Advice: OBGYN is all about timelines (at least, the OB part is). Pay attention to gestational age requirements for diagnosis of various conditions. Know the various labs that are used to diagnose Pre-eclampsia with severe features, and really pay attention to risk factors for the various obstetric complications. As one nurse midwife I worked with put it, "The biggest risk factor anything in L & D is usually a history of the same complication". I didn't really find the UWise Q-bank that useful, but if you have extra time, it's a nice source of extra practice questions, or a good way to reinforce any trouble spots.
Raw Score: 87
Pediatrics
Resources: UWorld, Case Files: Pediatrics, NBME practice shelf exams ("CMS forms"), CDC vaccination schedule, Emma Holliday review
Advice: Know the general trends of pediatric vital signs (what's normal for an adult is abnormal for most pediatric patients and vice versa), pay attention to rashes and dermatology, and review these as often as possible. It's well worth your time to do a good review of all the glycogen storage diseases, inborn errors of metabolism, lysosomal storage diseases, etc that you forgot after Step 1. For this reason, if you can do Peds as your last rotation before Step 2 it's kind of nice...then you only have to re-learn all this stuff once. This stuff is fair game for Step 2 (and I did personally get questions on it on my exam).
Raw Score: 91
Dedicated Study
I completed my first pass of UWorld during my M3 core rotations with an average of 74%. I did reset UWorld and begin a 2nd pass during dedicated, but I found that the questions repeated a lot of content that I knew well, and ultimately decided it wasn't a good use of my time. I only completed about 20% of my 2nd pass of UWorld with an average of 92%.My main resources during dedicated were NBME practice exams (I did 8-14 timed), UWSAs, and the Free 120. I also listened to some Divine Intervention episodes on my runs and reviewed the Emma Holliday shelf exam reviews (I had previously listened to these during my M3 rotations). Of the podcasts, I found the Divine Intervention Free 120 review the most helpful, and would strongly recommend listening to those episodes after you take the Free 120. It did a lot to help me with some test taking strategies that I used on exam day.
General advice for dedicated:
- Keep on a regular sleep schedule, even on your days off. I went to bed at 10 and got up at 6 every day, because I wanted my schedule to be close to what I would need to do on test day.
- Take days off. I took at least 1/2 a day off every week. I also ran a major marathon 2 weeks before my test day, so that was a very light weekend in terms of studying.
- Keep exercising and doing things you enjoy. For me, this meant running a marathon (something I do regularly). You don't have to go as crazy as I did, but do something to get outside and stay active. It will help you keep the anxiety under control and see the sunlight every so often.
- Take practice exams regularly and spend plenty of time reviewing them. I made a google doc to keep track of incorrects and assigned each one to a category of "why I got it wrong" (i.e., "overthinking", "knowledge gap", "guessed wrong of 2", etc). This helps to identify trends. I found that I have a tendency to overthink questions, so identifying this helped me to address this weakness and gave me confidence to go with my gut instinct on the exam.
- Don't be afraid to adjust your study plan during dedicated. I started a 2nd pass of UWorld, but after about 2 weeks of dedicated, I felt like I wasn't really getting anything additional out of it and I was remembering too many of the questions from my 1st pass, so I just stopped using it. I spent that time on other resources instead (more practice exams). Take the time to really analyze which activities are actually helping your learning. Don't just do something because that's what everyone else is doing during their dedicated.
- Keep up with your review strategy. For me, this was Anki. I spent 2-4 hours every morning during dedicated doing Anki. At times, I worried that this was too much time on Anki, but part of what makes Step 2 (and all USMLE exams) challenging is the sheer breadth of content. The best way to prep for this is to keep consistent with your review strategy.
- If there's a concept you dread seeing in a question stem, STOP, do not pass Go, do not collect $20. Take a second to go to a primary source (UpToDate, a textbook) and review that content. Make some flash cards and review it regularly.
- Practice your timing. I came up with my exam day break strategy at the start of my dedicated, and every time I took a practice exam, I practiced my break strategy (at least, the first 5 blocks of my break strategy). This made it very easy for me to execute on test day because I was already used to doing 5 blocks in a row exactly this way. I took my lunch break after block 5 instead of block 4 (because I liked the psychological factor of knowing the exam was more than halfway done). Coming back for 3 more was no problem on test day.
CCSE: 254 (my school requires this, and it was given a few days after the final shelf exam, right at the start of my dedicated period)
NBME 9 (30 days out) 269
NBME 10 (21 days out) 268
NBME 11 (18 days out) 262
NBME 12 (15 days out) 251
NBME 13 (7 days out) 264
NBME 14 (2 days out) 264
UWSA 1 (25 days out) 254
UWSA 2 (9 days out) 268
UWSA 3 (5 days out) 266
New Free 120 (3 days out) 85%
Predicted score: 265
The Day Before
Just take a break, for the love of all that is good. I went for a run, watched some old TV, read for fun, had a nice pasta dinner, and tried to go to bed early. Laid out everything I needed (lucky t-shirt, snacks, testing permit, ID, keys, etc).Of course, I ended up tossing and turning most of the night and slept very poorly. When I woke up, I considered trying to postpone my test, but ultimately I decided I just wanted it over and done with and I wasn't willing to wait any longer. My point here is that even if you have anxiety and/or a single bad night of sleep before the exam, you can still do very well if you've done the work. As we say in the marathon world, trust your training.
The Test
Got to the testing center 45 minutes early. Made sure the last thing I did before going through security was to take a bathroom break. Brought plenty of snacks, headache medication, chocolate, and a healthy and delicious lunch (I think there's some psychological power in knowing you have a delicious lunch awaiting you).During the exam, I took a break of at least 5 min after every block. Personally, I found the mental break was extremely helpful. On the whole, I found the exam to be quite reasonable.
Step 2 CK: 277
My last piece of advice will be that I think doing well throughout third year is the best thing you can do. If you've had a break after 3rd year or you are an IMG or someone coming from a non-traditional program, doing a thorough content review with the CMS forms before starting Step 2 specific practice exams is a good idea.
Ultimately, I think the most important things are:
1.) Choosing a FEW, QUALITY resources to review
2.) Continuing your ACTIVE, CONTINUOUS review strategy
3.) Keeping a consistent schedule with time for sleep, healthy eating, exercise, and something you find fun (ideally something other than TV).
4.) Staying off Reddit. Really, I mean it. Especially during dedicated, it's just a black hole of anxiety and angst and you should avoid it at all costs. Come back after you get your amazing scores and pay it forward to others.
2024.05.18 17:38 BettaStef 2 finished baby quilts
 | So happy with these! The patterns is from cluck cluck sew - simple heart quilt. It's FREE lol. The backing is minky which was surprisingly easy to work with. Bonus cat tax. submitted by BettaStef to quilting [link] [comments] |
2024.05.18 16:47 SpacePaladin15 The Nature of Predators 2-37
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Memory Transcription Subject: Taylor Trench, Human Colonist
Date [standardized human time]: July 15, 2160
With boot camp completed, I was free to leave the base in my off-duty hours. My plan for the rest day was to wander the city with Gress, who was eager to see Lecca and Juvre after weeks separated. His daughter had loved the idea of staying on “the human planet,” so we were heading to a hotel room where his ex-wife had planned a faceless handoff. The Krev hadn’t let me out of his sight since my abduction, because we’d yet to receive any leads on Mafani’s hideout. Where could that former black ops prick even be hiding, and why couldn’t Gress’ contact locate him? My exchange partner was worried the Resket would come back for me, and honestly, I shared those fears. I was jumpy and worried about going anywhere nobody had eyes on me.
It was a waiting game to see my persecutors get their comeuppance, and my patience was waning. General Radai was meticulous with his planning, instead of pressing our advantage before they’d have a chance to send another round of ships into our space. On the subject of lingering fears, when an armada twenty-thousand-strong burst in Tellus’ space, it had brought back memories of how the exterminator fleet had come to Earth. The greatest insult was that the bastards had figured out drones, most likely from studying my own species, so they weren’t pushovers we could use psychological warfare against anymore. Despite the advancements, the Consortium vanquished them; my faith was restored.
It’s cause for celebration. The scales—pun intended—are tipped in our favor. Now, it’s just a matter of waiting for the threefold decapitation strike to make the month-long journey; fighting a war across great distances will require patience. Persistence, some might say.
We hadn’t found too many hints in the wreckage, as the drone parts began to disintegrate almost as soon as their seams were undone. In my mind, there was no doubt they’d used our technology to some extent. Why worry about feckless crews when computers could do their dirty work? What we knew for certain was that their trails led back toward the Federation’s border, which left me wondering if our first strike didn’t need to include the Sivkits. This all started with their arrival, so they must be at the root of this conflict. Whatever General Radai might’ve thought, this proved that destroying their fleet was the right decision—who knew what kind of intel they might’ve gotten, if we spoke to them or allowed them any closer to our new home?
As much as I loved spending time with my Krev friend, perhaps the only person I’d ever felt close to, my heart was right in the thick of the war. No day wandering Tellus with Lecca could have a guarantee of safety, not until we convinced those Feddie bastards not to come knocking on our doors.
“I heard Quana was going on a tour of the caverns. She wanted to see how you lived; told Cherise it was insightful to witness a species’ conditions with your own eyes,” Gress said, as we ascended in the hotel elevator.
I tilted my head. “You two talked, voluntarily? Quana’s been less hostile since she was given the clearance to take Mafani out, but…”
“I overheard her talking with Cherise. Your Jaslip friend was interested in seeing the vault of your keepsakes from Earth. My guess is she likes the idea of making one for Esquo.”
“Jaslips had time to safeguard their artifacts, and plan the transition. I’m not sure what they’d need a vault for; they have more than fucking pictures and empty memories.”
The Krev looked at me with sad eyes, as the doors opened. “If we win this war, or are able to stop by Sol, maybe we could save a few artifacts. There has to be something, even if it’s at the bottom of the ocean, that we can save. I want to help, Taylor; my heart breaks for you and your people.”
“I know. I’m just fucked up, and I don’t know what I believe, other than that I don’t deserve you. Our history is me turning on you, doubting you, assaulting you.”
“You gave me a chance to get it right, like I couldn’t all those years ago. I’m going to save you as many times as it takes, even if it’s from yourself. You can’t push me away, or hide how you really feel.”
“How do I really feel, Gress?”
“I, um…you turned on me because you trusted me and were willing to be vulnerable. Because you care…we care deeply about each other. You express pain by blowing up, so you don’t have to admit it to yourself.”
“It’s not blowing up. I want to do something with my feelings.”
“There are other ways.”
That’s a nice statement from Captain Obvious, though he made it sound quite cryptic. Is there something more he’s not saying?
Gress steered me down the hallway, as I continued on in silence. We unlocked the door to Lecca’s room, and my leg was immediately latched onto by the little Krev. Her claws tore the fabric of my jeans, which caused her father to wince. The kid didn’t notice at all, instead bouncing up and down with excitement. Juvre crawled back into his cage, and began shaking it from the inside; of course the obor was acting possessed at the mere sight of me. He was basically a Fed. If it hadn’t been for how distraught Gress told me he was putting his first obor down, I’d suggest he give this primate some night-night syrup. There were better pets out there.
“Daddy, Daddy!” Lecca finally released me, diving on top of her father’s tail. Who made her so hyper? “Tell me something cute about the humans.”
Gress cast a sly glance at me. “Let’s see. Their celebrities walked down red carpets at big events, and pranced right on down the ‘fancy’ color strip.”
“I wanna see! If I make one for Taylor, can he walk down it? He has to show me!”
“Taylor would love to, wouldn’t he?”
“Absolutely not,” I protested. “What next, do I have to get petted by you?”
“You don’t have to, but…I figured out a way that humans will pay me to pet them. I hear you like massages: if I ran a massage parlor on Tellus, work would just be petting humans for hours. Might go for it after the war.”
“You can’t be serious, Gress.”
“That sounds like a great job, Daddy!” Lecca cheered. “That’s what I wanna do. I can’t believe we used to be scared of them; they’re so squishy, and adorable.”
“Yeah, I think I’m done with that conversation. Call me back when you figure out where Lecca wants to go. I’ll occupy myself snooping through your things.”
Juvre poked his head out of the cage as I ambled away, baring his teeth while on all fours. I found myself imagining the obor painted in clown makeup; perhaps I could persuade Gress’ daughter to do that to him, not knowing the true meaning. I rolled my hands into fists, faked a sad expression, then flapped them around near my eyes in mock crying. The primate made the motions of lunging at me, and I leapt away with a hint of fright. My friend’s worthless pet settled back on his haunches, and snickered in his shrieking register.
Demon. Diabolical little shit; I’m gonna rattle his cage in the middle of the night, right when he’s sleeping.
I took a closer look around the hotel, checking out the accommodations that visitors to Tellus would have; we had more guests on our world than ark settlers. The obor backpack Gress mentioned was sitting out on the couch, revealing a popup book about us for kids. I tugged the print media out, but was too lazy to get a visual translator to read the simplistic words. One picture showed a human kid playing on a swing set, and the child appeared on the next slide wearing a triangular hat and blowing out birthday candles. I turned the page, finding images of jump rope and hopscotch.
My hands slammed the book shut, feeling a bit deflated. We’d never done those kinds of things when I was a child in the caverns; our circumstances robbed me of almost every fun experience I could’ve had. I supposed this hardcover was about how human kids played, so that sated my curiosity. Perhaps it would’ve been better if I hadn’t been reminded about certain parts of our culture that I missed out on. Then again, it was never too late to start playing around and having fun, right? Something on the floor caught my eye; I reached my hand beneath the couch, pulling out some kind of puzzle cube.
“Well, what do we have here?” I picked up a four-sided figure with a few movable L-shapes fitted on the outside. Noticing a faint aroma, I brought it to my nose; it smelled fruity, and I wondered if this was some inverse, puzzle version of a Ring Pop. I shook it, feeling and hearing something inside. “Gotcha. Let’s see how to get this open…it’s like a Rubik’s Cube with an actual incentive.”
I rotated the L pieces enough to free one side, working to shift the square underneath into an upper layer. Getting parts of the cube to flip into an outer shell was easy, but the gaps were only big enough to jam my pinky into; it made a bit of a lattice pattern. I tried attacking it from two sides, freeing part of each surface—the contraption still defied me. Growling in frustration, I placed it between my feet and tried to tug it open. The commotion drew Gress and Lecca over to see what I was up to, and my Krev friend immediately morphed into a melty face. He caught himself, eyes shifting back and forth in a conflicted dance.
Stupid thing. I can’t get it open. This is a time waster: you’d have to be Einsteinian to solve it.
“Um, Taylor?” Gress ventured. “I…it’s natural and totally okay, of course, if you would share interests with other primates, but, well…that’s one of Juvre’s toys.”
I threw the cube away like a hot potato, bringing about a collision with the obor’s cage. “It just looked fun. Like a Rubik’s Cube, but it’s not solvable. Shit, I didn’t know. Only Juvre would be stupid enough to keep working on this; it’s a hamster wheel, man.”
The red-furred obor chittered, picking up the unsolvable puzzle. Juvre began unscrewing the pieces, moving certain blocks upward in various intervals. The primate seemed to be making tangible progress on it, and tinkered with it in silent focus. He screeched happily as he made an incision wide enough to squeeze his hand through. The monkey-like creature waved a red, powdery substance in the air, likely the source of the sugary scent; Gress called out, “Good obor!” There was a triumphant glint in the animal’s binocular eyes, as I gestured to him in indignant outrage; he popped the cookie in his mouth, crunching it in his molars.
“That’s not fair!” I shouted. “The bastard critter cheated. How come Juvre could get it open like nothing? He knows some trick, or gimmick you trained him in. He’s mocking me, chomping away at his treat like he earned it. Circus animal. Food thief gremlin!”
“I…uhhh...” Gress seemed at a loss for words; his tongue hung out of his mouth, twitching. “I can give you an obor treat too?”
“What? I don’t want pet food. Who knows what Krev put in that: you guys eat literal rocks.”
“Because we don’t have teeth. This would be perfectly edible, if that’s what you worried about. I don’t want you feeling, um, left out. There’s enough to go around, and it’s not a competition.”
“If it’s a competition, Juvre would’ve won,” Lecca said unhelpfully.
I scowled at the child. “Did your father teach you to lie? I did most of the hard work for the damn obor. He took what I already did.”
“Which is what exactly?”
“You little—”
Gress retrieved a treat bag from the kitchen, jingling it at me. “Will one of these make you stop arguing with my daughter?”
Juvre curled his lips upward, taunting me as he scooped crumbs off the floor.
“Fine. Give me one, just so that no-good obor can watch me eat it. Show him his place,” I huffed.
Gress’ eyes lit up, though he quickly attempted to mask his happiness. The Krev placed one of the cookies in my palm, and I held it up with suspicion. Maybe I should’ve asked if they’d crushed any dried insects in with the fruit paste, since I knew that was what they fed Juvre quite often. However, not wanting the pet to relish his feeling of superiority, I popped the treat into my mouth while staring right at him. My immediate instinct was to brace myself for a retching sensation, trying to hide my disgust. However, I wasn’t expecting it to taste fucking amazing. It was lighter than flour, singing with the juicy flavors of fruit snacks, then full of sodium in the center, reminding me of salted caramel.
“Shit,” I managed through a mouthful of food, raising my eyebrows at the Krev. “That’s…actually pretty good.”
Lecca stomped her foot, pouting. “Why don’t I get to give Taylor a treat, Daddy? You have all the fun!”
“Well…you can if he wants more, I guess. Just don’t throw it on the floor; hand it to him,” Gress ordered.
I searched for a glass of water, before holding out my palm. “If you want something to hand out at Halloween, this would definitely do. Maybe keep what they are on the down low.”
The Krev kid pranced over to me, carrying the bag. “So you want one?”
“Unfortunately for my little remaining self-respect, yes.”
“Okay then. Taylor, sit!”
I gaped at her. “The fuck did you just say?”
Gress wagged a scolding claw. “Lecca! How would you feel, being given commands like an animal?”
“I get told, ‘do your homework,’ take a bath,’ ‘go to bed’ as my whole life. At least he’ll get something for listening.”
“It’s not acceptable to treat my friend—a sapient being who I care about and respect very much—like Juvre.”
“You don’t care about or respect Juvre?”
“That’s not what I meant. I’m saying Taylor is capable of understanding much more than sit—as are you. Juvre couldn’t understand the concept of ‘do your homework,’ no matter the training he gets. Taylor can. It’s demeaning to the humans, and not how you treat someone as an equal, a friend.”
“I just wanna take care of them and be nice. I know he can talk, but look at him!”
“Lecca, what if there was someone out there who thought the same about Krev? Is it fair to disregard everything else about them?” Gress looked flustered, but walked over to me, placing a paw on my shoulder. “To another set of species, Taylor is a terrifying monster. He lost everyone he had in this universe, because they didn’t care about who he was—only what he was. How we treat people shouldn’t—must not be—based on how they look to us.”
I lowered my head. “Your father is right. I’m a primate, but I don’t want to be some caged animal that does tricks. I was that back in the cavern, going up to follow someone else’s commands. It hurt a part of my soul. Please don’t think of me as a pet. That’s not being nice.”
Lecca sighed, before setting the treat bag down. “I’m sorry. I don’t wanna hurt you, Taylor. Is it…mean that I think you’re reeeeeeally adorable?”
“No. It’s a welcome change after being treated like a monster that didn’t deserve to live, and having people cower at the mere sight of us.”
“Those aliens’ eyes are broken! I just wanted to see what you looked like sitting down, or rolling over.”
“You could’ve asked. I don’t need a treat. It’s enough to make you happy, as long as you don’t treat me like some object to gawk at.”
“Okay. Could you please sit on the floor? I like watching humans just walk around and do simple stuff, so it’d be cool…and I think everything you do is adorable, if that’s a reason?”
I chuckled. “Fine. After that, would you like to go to the playground with the human kids? I saw you liked swing sets, hopscotch, and some other things; if your dad is okay with it, maybe you could try it in real life.”
“Really? Yes! Please, Daddy, can we—can we?”
“Okay, but you’re going to be very careful on the swings. I don’t want you falling off,” Gress responded.
“Yay! Quick, Taylor, sit down so we can go to the playground! I wanna go right now…um, I mean, please do that because it’d be nice and I’m so excited!”
Deciding to humor Lecca since she was at least trying to make it a request, I flopped down on the floor. I didn’t think much about how I situated myself, bending my legs and placing one foot beneath each knee: the familiar diamond shape shown by children in a reading circle in an elementary school classroom. Gress’ expression changed to the annoying one, which meant I’d inadvertently done something cute to him; Lecca rushed to take a picture, and I made no attempt to stop her. The Krev child squealed, flailing her claws around in excitement at my mundane behavior.
Well, this is a new way to make a kid’s day. By…let me check my notes…sitting cross-legged on the ground.
“Is that a normal way that humans sit? Your legs are all folded up and overlapping,” Gress gushed. “And your feet are like little pedestals for your knees; it’d be even cuter if I could see your wiggly toes!”
I facepalmed, standing up in a hurry. “There’s nothing special about this. You can’t be serious. It’s called criss-cross applesauce.”
“Aw, even the name is the cutest thing. I heard that rhyme…and it mentions fruit mash, if ‘applesauce’ translated. I can imagine it smeared all over your face, replacing that fur you shave away, where you coat your chin in that white foam. That made you look more babyish and harmless! I can’t.”
“You’re horrible; and how can you say I’m harmless one sentence, then go ‘primates are violent’ in the next? You know I’m not harmless, because I literally whacked you over the head.”
“I don’t put continuity between one thought and the next, because I’ll think whatever is necessary to make you precious and pettable! You can’t stop me.”
“Precious? Nope, I can and will stop you; I’ll look really sad if you use that to describe me again. I know how to hurt you.”
“But I can hug you if you look sad.”
I scoffed. “Playground. Now.”
The Krev coaxed his daughter out of the hotel room, and I thought to myself that there were worse ways to be spending this limbo, waiting for news on Mafani and the Federation. Human kids playing together with aliens hadn’t been in my wildest imagination four months ago, but now, I could watch other children have the fun times that I never experienced. That was a reason to press on and keep fighting. It was wonderful to have people in my life who cared about me, no matter what happened, and who could explore the new and improved Tellus with me.
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Star Crossed [Multiple Free Sample Chapters] Patreon Subreddit Discord Paperback NOP2 Species Lore
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Star Crossed [Multiple Free Sample Chapters] Patreon Subreddit Discord Paperback NOP2 Species Lore
Date [standardized human time]: July 15, 2160
With boot camp completed, I was free to leave the base in my off-duty hours. My plan for the rest day was to wander the city with Gress, who was eager to see Lecca and Juvre after weeks separated. His daughter had loved the idea of staying on “the human planet,” so we were heading to a hotel room where his ex-wife had planned a faceless handoff. The Krev hadn’t let me out of his sight since my abduction, because we’d yet to receive any leads on Mafani’s hideout. Where could that former black ops prick even be hiding, and why couldn’t Gress’ contact locate him? My exchange partner was worried the Resket would come back for me, and honestly, I shared those fears. I was jumpy and worried about going anywhere nobody had eyes on me.
It was a waiting game to see my persecutors get their comeuppance, and my patience was waning. General Radai was meticulous with his planning, instead of pressing our advantage before they’d have a chance to send another round of ships into our space. On the subject of lingering fears, when an armada twenty-thousand-strong burst in Tellus’ space, it had brought back memories of how the exterminator fleet had come to Earth. The greatest insult was that the bastards had figured out drones, most likely from studying my own species, so they weren’t pushovers we could use psychological warfare against anymore. Despite the advancements, the Consortium vanquished them; my faith was restored.
It’s cause for celebration. The scales—pun intended—are tipped in our favor. Now, it’s just a matter of waiting for the threefold decapitation strike to make the month-long journey; fighting a war across great distances will require patience. Persistence, some might say.
We hadn’t found too many hints in the wreckage, as the drone parts began to disintegrate almost as soon as their seams were undone. In my mind, there was no doubt they’d used our technology to some extent. Why worry about feckless crews when computers could do their dirty work? What we knew for certain was that their trails led back toward the Federation’s border, which left me wondering if our first strike didn’t need to include the Sivkits. This all started with their arrival, so they must be at the root of this conflict. Whatever General Radai might’ve thought, this proved that destroying their fleet was the right decision—who knew what kind of intel they might’ve gotten, if we spoke to them or allowed them any closer to our new home?
As much as I loved spending time with my Krev friend, perhaps the only person I’d ever felt close to, my heart was right in the thick of the war. No day wandering Tellus with Lecca could have a guarantee of safety, not until we convinced those Feddie bastards not to come knocking on our doors.
“I heard Quana was going on a tour of the caverns. She wanted to see how you lived; told Cherise it was insightful to witness a species’ conditions with your own eyes,” Gress said, as we ascended in the hotel elevator.
I tilted my head. “You two talked, voluntarily? Quana’s been less hostile since she was given the clearance to take Mafani out, but…”
“I overheard her talking with Cherise. Your Jaslip friend was interested in seeing the vault of your keepsakes from Earth. My guess is she likes the idea of making one for Esquo.”
“Jaslips had time to safeguard their artifacts, and plan the transition. I’m not sure what they’d need a vault for; they have more than fucking pictures and empty memories.”
The Krev looked at me with sad eyes, as the doors opened. “If we win this war, or are able to stop by Sol, maybe we could save a few artifacts. There has to be something, even if it’s at the bottom of the ocean, that we can save. I want to help, Taylor; my heart breaks for you and your people.”
“I know. I’m just fucked up, and I don’t know what I believe, other than that I don’t deserve you. Our history is me turning on you, doubting you, assaulting you.”
“You gave me a chance to get it right, like I couldn’t all those years ago. I’m going to save you as many times as it takes, even if it’s from yourself. You can’t push me away, or hide how you really feel.”
“How do I really feel, Gress?”
“I, um…you turned on me because you trusted me and were willing to be vulnerable. Because you care…we care deeply about each other. You express pain by blowing up, so you don’t have to admit it to yourself.”
“It’s not blowing up. I want to do something with my feelings.”
“There are other ways.”
That’s a nice statement from Captain Obvious, though he made it sound quite cryptic. Is there something more he’s not saying?
Gress steered me down the hallway, as I continued on in silence. We unlocked the door to Lecca’s room, and my leg was immediately latched onto by the little Krev. Her claws tore the fabric of my jeans, which caused her father to wince. The kid didn’t notice at all, instead bouncing up and down with excitement. Juvre crawled back into his cage, and began shaking it from the inside; of course the obor was acting possessed at the mere sight of me. He was basically a Fed. If it hadn’t been for how distraught Gress told me he was putting his first obor down, I’d suggest he give this primate some night-night syrup. There were better pets out there.
“Daddy, Daddy!” Lecca finally released me, diving on top of her father’s tail. Who made her so hyper? “Tell me something cute about the humans.”
Gress cast a sly glance at me. “Let’s see. Their celebrities walked down red carpets at big events, and pranced right on down the ‘fancy’ color strip.”
“I wanna see! If I make one for Taylor, can he walk down it? He has to show me!”
“Taylor would love to, wouldn’t he?”
“Absolutely not,” I protested. “What next, do I have to get petted by you?”
“You don’t have to, but…I figured out a way that humans will pay me to pet them. I hear you like massages: if I ran a massage parlor on Tellus, work would just be petting humans for hours. Might go for it after the war.”
“You can’t be serious, Gress.”
“That sounds like a great job, Daddy!” Lecca cheered. “That’s what I wanna do. I can’t believe we used to be scared of them; they’re so squishy, and adorable.”
“Yeah, I think I’m done with that conversation. Call me back when you figure out where Lecca wants to go. I’ll occupy myself snooping through your things.”
Juvre poked his head out of the cage as I ambled away, baring his teeth while on all fours. I found myself imagining the obor painted in clown makeup; perhaps I could persuade Gress’ daughter to do that to him, not knowing the true meaning. I rolled my hands into fists, faked a sad expression, then flapped them around near my eyes in mock crying. The primate made the motions of lunging at me, and I leapt away with a hint of fright. My friend’s worthless pet settled back on his haunches, and snickered in his shrieking register.
Demon. Diabolical little shit; I’m gonna rattle his cage in the middle of the night, right when he’s sleeping.
I took a closer look around the hotel, checking out the accommodations that visitors to Tellus would have; we had more guests on our world than ark settlers. The obor backpack Gress mentioned was sitting out on the couch, revealing a popup book about us for kids. I tugged the print media out, but was too lazy to get a visual translator to read the simplistic words. One picture showed a human kid playing on a swing set, and the child appeared on the next slide wearing a triangular hat and blowing out birthday candles. I turned the page, finding images of jump rope and hopscotch.
My hands slammed the book shut, feeling a bit deflated. We’d never done those kinds of things when I was a child in the caverns; our circumstances robbed me of almost every fun experience I could’ve had. I supposed this hardcover was about how human kids played, so that sated my curiosity. Perhaps it would’ve been better if I hadn’t been reminded about certain parts of our culture that I missed out on. Then again, it was never too late to start playing around and having fun, right? Something on the floor caught my eye; I reached my hand beneath the couch, pulling out some kind of puzzle cube.
“Well, what do we have here?” I picked up a four-sided figure with a few movable L-shapes fitted on the outside. Noticing a faint aroma, I brought it to my nose; it smelled fruity, and I wondered if this was some inverse, puzzle version of a Ring Pop. I shook it, feeling and hearing something inside. “Gotcha. Let’s see how to get this open…it’s like a Rubik’s Cube with an actual incentive.”
I rotated the L pieces enough to free one side, working to shift the square underneath into an upper layer. Getting parts of the cube to flip into an outer shell was easy, but the gaps were only big enough to jam my pinky into; it made a bit of a lattice pattern. I tried attacking it from two sides, freeing part of each surface—the contraption still defied me. Growling in frustration, I placed it between my feet and tried to tug it open. The commotion drew Gress and Lecca over to see what I was up to, and my Krev friend immediately morphed into a melty face. He caught himself, eyes shifting back and forth in a conflicted dance.
Stupid thing. I can’t get it open. This is a time waster: you’d have to be Einsteinian to solve it.
“Um, Taylor?” Gress ventured. “I…it’s natural and totally okay, of course, if you would share interests with other primates, but, well…that’s one of Juvre’s toys.”
I threw the cube away like a hot potato, bringing about a collision with the obor’s cage. “It just looked fun. Like a Rubik’s Cube, but it’s not solvable. Shit, I didn’t know. Only Juvre would be stupid enough to keep working on this; it’s a hamster wheel, man.”
The red-furred obor chittered, picking up the unsolvable puzzle. Juvre began unscrewing the pieces, moving certain blocks upward in various intervals. The primate seemed to be making tangible progress on it, and tinkered with it in silent focus. He screeched happily as he made an incision wide enough to squeeze his hand through. The monkey-like creature waved a red, powdery substance in the air, likely the source of the sugary scent; Gress called out, “Good obor!” There was a triumphant glint in the animal’s binocular eyes, as I gestured to him in indignant outrage; he popped the cookie in his mouth, crunching it in his molars.
“That’s not fair!” I shouted. “The bastard critter cheated. How come Juvre could get it open like nothing? He knows some trick, or gimmick you trained him in. He’s mocking me, chomping away at his treat like he earned it. Circus animal. Food thief gremlin!”
“I…uhhh...” Gress seemed at a loss for words; his tongue hung out of his mouth, twitching. “I can give you an obor treat too?”
“What? I don’t want pet food. Who knows what Krev put in that: you guys eat literal rocks.”
“Because we don’t have teeth. This would be perfectly edible, if that’s what you worried about. I don’t want you feeling, um, left out. There’s enough to go around, and it’s not a competition.”
“If it’s a competition, Juvre would’ve won,” Lecca said unhelpfully.
I scowled at the child. “Did your father teach you to lie? I did most of the hard work for the damn obor. He took what I already did.”
“Which is what exactly?”
“You little—”
Gress retrieved a treat bag from the kitchen, jingling it at me. “Will one of these make you stop arguing with my daughter?”
Juvre curled his lips upward, taunting me as he scooped crumbs off the floor.
“Fine. Give me one, just so that no-good obor can watch me eat it. Show him his place,” I huffed.
Gress’ eyes lit up, though he quickly attempted to mask his happiness. The Krev placed one of the cookies in my palm, and I held it up with suspicion. Maybe I should’ve asked if they’d crushed any dried insects in with the fruit paste, since I knew that was what they fed Juvre quite often. However, not wanting the pet to relish his feeling of superiority, I popped the treat into my mouth while staring right at him. My immediate instinct was to brace myself for a retching sensation, trying to hide my disgust. However, I wasn’t expecting it to taste fucking amazing. It was lighter than flour, singing with the juicy flavors of fruit snacks, then full of sodium in the center, reminding me of salted caramel.
“Shit,” I managed through a mouthful of food, raising my eyebrows at the Krev. “That’s…actually pretty good.”
Lecca stomped her foot, pouting. “Why don’t I get to give Taylor a treat, Daddy? You have all the fun!”
“Well…you can if he wants more, I guess. Just don’t throw it on the floor; hand it to him,” Gress ordered.
I searched for a glass of water, before holding out my palm. “If you want something to hand out at Halloween, this would definitely do. Maybe keep what they are on the down low.”
The Krev kid pranced over to me, carrying the bag. “So you want one?”
“Unfortunately for my little remaining self-respect, yes.”
“Okay then. Taylor, sit!”
I gaped at her. “The fuck did you just say?”
Gress wagged a scolding claw. “Lecca! How would you feel, being given commands like an animal?”
“I get told, ‘do your homework,’ take a bath,’ ‘go to bed’ as my whole life. At least he’ll get something for listening.”
“It’s not acceptable to treat my friend—a sapient being who I care about and respect very much—like Juvre.”
“You don’t care about or respect Juvre?”
“That’s not what I meant. I’m saying Taylor is capable of understanding much more than sit—as are you. Juvre couldn’t understand the concept of ‘do your homework,’ no matter the training he gets. Taylor can. It’s demeaning to the humans, and not how you treat someone as an equal, a friend.”
“I just wanna take care of them and be nice. I know he can talk, but look at him!”
“Lecca, what if there was someone out there who thought the same about Krev? Is it fair to disregard everything else about them?” Gress looked flustered, but walked over to me, placing a paw on my shoulder. “To another set of species, Taylor is a terrifying monster. He lost everyone he had in this universe, because they didn’t care about who he was—only what he was. How we treat people shouldn’t—must not be—based on how they look to us.”
I lowered my head. “Your father is right. I’m a primate, but I don’t want to be some caged animal that does tricks. I was that back in the cavern, going up to follow someone else’s commands. It hurt a part of my soul. Please don’t think of me as a pet. That’s not being nice.”
Lecca sighed, before setting the treat bag down. “I’m sorry. I don’t wanna hurt you, Taylor. Is it…mean that I think you’re reeeeeeally adorable?”
“No. It’s a welcome change after being treated like a monster that didn’t deserve to live, and having people cower at the mere sight of us.”
“Those aliens’ eyes are broken! I just wanted to see what you looked like sitting down, or rolling over.”
“You could’ve asked. I don’t need a treat. It’s enough to make you happy, as long as you don’t treat me like some object to gawk at.”
“Okay. Could you please sit on the floor? I like watching humans just walk around and do simple stuff, so it’d be cool…and I think everything you do is adorable, if that’s a reason?”
I chuckled. “Fine. After that, would you like to go to the playground with the human kids? I saw you liked swing sets, hopscotch, and some other things; if your dad is okay with it, maybe you could try it in real life.”
“Really? Yes! Please, Daddy, can we—can we?”
“Okay, but you’re going to be very careful on the swings. I don’t want you falling off,” Gress responded.
“Yay! Quick, Taylor, sit down so we can go to the playground! I wanna go right now…um, I mean, please do that because it’d be nice and I’m so excited!”
Deciding to humor Lecca since she was at least trying to make it a request, I flopped down on the floor. I didn’t think much about how I situated myself, bending my legs and placing one foot beneath each knee: the familiar diamond shape shown by children in a reading circle in an elementary school classroom. Gress’ expression changed to the annoying one, which meant I’d inadvertently done something cute to him; Lecca rushed to take a picture, and I made no attempt to stop her. The Krev child squealed, flailing her claws around in excitement at my mundane behavior.
Well, this is a new way to make a kid’s day. By…let me check my notes…sitting cross-legged on the ground.
“Is that a normal way that humans sit? Your legs are all folded up and overlapping,” Gress gushed. “And your feet are like little pedestals for your knees; it’d be even cuter if I could see your wiggly toes!”
I facepalmed, standing up in a hurry. “There’s nothing special about this. You can’t be serious. It’s called criss-cross applesauce.”
“Aw, even the name is the cutest thing. I heard that rhyme…and it mentions fruit mash, if ‘applesauce’ translated. I can imagine it smeared all over your face, replacing that fur you shave away, where you coat your chin in that white foam. That made you look more babyish and harmless! I can’t.”
“You’re horrible; and how can you say I’m harmless one sentence, then go ‘primates are violent’ in the next? You know I’m not harmless, because I literally whacked you over the head.”
“I don’t put continuity between one thought and the next, because I’ll think whatever is necessary to make you precious and pettable! You can’t stop me.”
“Precious? Nope, I can and will stop you; I’ll look really sad if you use that to describe me again. I know how to hurt you.”
“But I can hug you if you look sad.”
I scoffed. “Playground. Now.”
The Krev coaxed his daughter out of the hotel room, and I thought to myself that there were worse ways to be spending this limbo, waiting for news on Mafani and the Federation. Human kids playing together with aliens hadn’t been in my wildest imagination four months ago, but now, I could watch other children have the fun times that I never experienced. That was a reason to press on and keep fighting. It was wonderful to have people in my life who cared about me, no matter what happened, and who could explore the new and improved Tellus with me.
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2024.05.18 15:51 PoppaSquot More on the standard characteristics of all Japan's New Religions - including Soka Gakkai
Continuing on from this post, this information also comes from Helen Hardacre's book Kurozumikyō and the New Religions of Japan, Princeton University Press, Princeton, New Jersey, 1986 - "Chapter Seven: The Unity of the New Religions" (pp. 188-193):
And don't forget the SGI's emphasis on YOUR eternal gratitude.
Keeping in mind that the focus of this book is on one of the oldest of Japan's "new religions", Kurozumikyō, to illustrate how very similar ALL Japan's "new religions" are to each other, with only minor differences, and this includes Soka Gakkai:
From the March 2022 paper, "‘Genderism vs. Humanism’: The Generational Shift and Push for Implementing Gender Equality within Soka Gakkai-Japan":
Similarly, Ikeda claimed to be "father" of everyone in the Soka Gakkai/SGI, quite possibly in preparation for replacing Japan's Emperor with himself.
Here is a bit more on the "ie" system - you'll be able to see some of the aspects of SGI that seemed odd while you were "in", I think:
Unfortunately for Ikeda and the Soka Gakkai, the appeal of this kind of structure was losing strength post-WWII; it's easy to see Toda's wisdom in declaring in the 1950s that, "If we don't achieve 𝘬𝘰̄𝘴𝘦𝘯-𝘳𝘶𝘧𝘶 within Japan within the next 25 or 26 years, it's game over." The Soka Gakkai's success in taking over Japan ("kosen-rufu") depended upon that conditioning that was no longer happening in the schools or in the family. Ikeda believed he was great enough that he'd be able to overcome the fading of that all-important cultural conditioning within the population after 1945, and somehow "win" against the odds. He didn't.
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This study has identified a vitalist, spiritualist world view as the most fundamental factor unifying the new religions. Whereas prior studies have recognized a rather standardized list of traits as shared by a number of the new religions, this study has tried to show how those traits are unified in originating from a particular conceptualization of self in relation to other levels of existence coupled with regular patterns of thought, action, and emotion. The kingpin of the system is the idea that the self-cultivation of the individual determines destiny.You can see this clearly expressed in this SGI saying:
"A great human revolution in just a single individual will help achieve a change in the destiny of a nation and, further, can even enable a change in the destiny of all humankind."That's the belief, at least. We don't see SGI members having anything close to this kind of impact on society or the world at large, and they've had over 80 years to show us all, almost 65 years here in the US. Nothing.
The religious life consists of such cultivation and of repaying the benefice of deity.Before anyone tries to say, "There's no 'god' in SGI!", remember that Ikeda HIMSELF defined the Soka Gakkai/SGI as a "monotheism". Considering that Ikeda is defined as "the world’s foremost authority on Nichiren Buddhism" and "the supreme theoretician" (with the only qualification apparently being the all-controlling leader of the Soka Gakkai/SGI), so whatever Icky says, goes.
And don't forget the SGI's emphasis on YOUR eternal gratitude.
Textual erudition, esoteric ritual, and the observance of abstinences will not serve as a basis for elevating the religious status of priests above that of the laity. The laity therefore tend to be central.Hence the inherent tension in the relationship between the Soka Gakkai and Nichiren Shoshu, ultimately showing that the "new religions" and the "old religions" simply don't mix.
Since individual self-cultivation is the primary determiner of all affairs, fatalistic notions and ideas of pollution must be recast. Unhindered (or less hindered) by notions of pollution, women play key roles.The "new religions" are so much better positioned to exploit this huge source of donations and free work! The Ikeda cult certainly has.
Because all problems can be traced to insufficient cultivation of the self, one cannot expect fundamental social change to occur through political action.Even though, ironically, this attitude simply entrenches the status quo and creates no change at ALL. As explained here, this belief simply produces a conservative attitude that rejects society's efforts to collectively help those in need. How many times did you hear in SGI that such-and-so needy person didn't need actual help; they "just need to chant to change their karma!"?? The Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. put it succinctly:
And civil rights legislation has done far MORE to advance the causes of equality and justice than ANY religion ever has. For example, the SGI still clings to its anachronistic, old-fashioned "4 divisional system" based in traditional Japanese patriarchal family norms, even though this is ill-fitting and inappropriate, even offensive, in Western cultures.Now the other myth that gets around is the idea that legislation cannot really solve the problem and that it has no great role to play in this period of social change because you’ve got to change the heart and you can’t change the heart through legislation. You can’t legislate morals. The job must be done through education and religion. Well, there’s half-truth involved here. Certainly, if the problem is to be solved then in the final sense, hearts must be changed. Religion and education must play a great role in changing the heart. But we must go on to say that while it may be true that morality cannot be legislated, behavior can be regulated. It may be true that the law cannot change the heart but it can restrain the heartless. It may be true that the law cannot make a man love me but it can keep him from lynching me and I think that is pretty important, also. So there is a need for executive orders. There is a need for judicial decrees. There is a need for civil rights legislation on the local scale within states and on the national scale from the federal government. Source
Similarly, attempting to cure disease through medical therapies alone can produce only a shallow healing.As discussed here, this kind of selling point might've flown in the 1800s, even in the early 1900s, and in the chaos of post-WWII defeated/occupied Japan, when people didn't really have access to medical treatment that worked, but now? GTFO. There are very few who will go for this, and they tend to be uneducated. You'll notice this "faith-healing" is hardly a major selling point any more.
Keeping in mind that the focus of this book is on one of the oldest of Japan's "new religions", Kurozumikyō, to illustrate how very similar ALL Japan's "new religions" are to each other, with only minor differences, and this includes Soka Gakkai:
The code of ethics seen in Kurozumikyō is not solely its own invention but is generally shared by both new and established religions. It rests in principles of family solidarity, authority of elders, and a clear-cut division of labor between the sexes.Is it still required in Japan that female Soka Gakkai employees retire as soon as they marry?
From the March 2022 paper, "‘Genderism vs. Humanism’: The Generational Shift and Push for Implementing Gender Equality within Soka Gakkai-Japan":
The Soka Gakkai (SG) certainly is not at ALL "progressive" on this issue! Ikeda blathered endlessly about "the century of women" and "empowering women", yet the organization HE CONTROLLED completely subjugates and exploits women! There ARE no female Soka Gakkai vice presidents.This paper investigates how young Japanese women in contemporary Soka Gakkai (SG) navigate Japan’s continuous gender stratified society that remains culturally rooted in the ‘salaryman-housewife’ ideology. How are young SG members reproducing or contesting these hegemonic gender norms that few seek to emulate? While SG has long proclaimed that it stands for gender equality, its employment structure and organization in Japan until recently reflected the typical male breadwinner ideology that came to underpin the post-war Japanese nation-state and systemic gender division of labor.
As an organization that has long claimed to support an internationalist/global ‘humanist’ agenda, driven by Daisaku Ikeda’s interpretation of Nichiren Buddhism, SG in Japan also rose to prominence in a society that culturally and ‘legally’ stratified men and women through a systematic gender division of labor.
According to the global gender gap index reported by the World Economic Forum, Iceland followed by Finland stood at the top of 156 countries as the most gender equal societies in 2021; Japan was ranked at 120 as one of the most unequal societies; the closest other OECD country was Italy, ranked as number 633. Even though the rate of female employment now mirrors other OECD countries, no significant change in women’s employment status and position in Japan has occurred. Women in management positions, economic participation and opportunity ranked 117, while their educational attainment stood as number 92, and political empowerment was close to the bottom, at number 147. Why would Japan, as an affluent, post-industrial society, find it so difficult to achieve gender equity on par with other OECD countries?
Yes, Soka Gakkai women work hard - just without pay. It's utterly exploitative. You can imagine how utterly dependent women are within this system and how vulnerable in cases of divorce. It's NOT AT ALL "humanistic" OR consistent with any "century of women"!Even if SG may be one of the biggest private organizations in Japan, the core work force by comparison is much smaller than the SG organization as a whole. Core regional or national male leaders were typically employed and remain employed as core workers on the general track, while until more recently the equivalent female leaders employed by the SGHQ would retire from paid employment upon marriage, and continue ‘unpaid’ leadership positions in the local area. ... SGHQ consists of the central leadership of the organization, but as an employer was built on the model of a typical Japanese company. This meant male employees were stratified as the core labor force and female employees as periphery, disposable labor. This thinking, on the one hand, reflected assumptions about women’s role as homemakers and mothers, which meant that SG female staff upon marriage would stop paid employment. In reality, this did not mean ‘retirement’ to become homemakers, but rather that married women continued ‘working’ for SG as leaders in the local voluntary organization. The vast majority of female and male members of SG never work for the organization as employees, including most of its women leaders. The organization throughout its post-war period relied heavily on the women’s division or fujinbu 婦人部 (see also McLaughlin 2019 who translates this more narrowly to refer to married women). However, particularly those women trained through working for the SGHQ moved onto become effectively unpaid staff and leaders in local areas once they had married and were economically supported by a husband. Women in SG, both those who were employed at the SGHQ and those that were in employment in other places before marriage—a much larger number—could be said to have been and still today remain the key driving force behind SG’s development in Japan: women organize, execute and lead a range of activities that involve the majority of members in the voluntary organization.
This family-centered ethic is found in established Buddhism and Shrine Shintō, and no new religion denies it. Some in fact go much further than Kurozumikyō to articulate it plainly and to implement it with a vengeance. The main difference in the familistic ethic between the established religions and the new lies in the sustained attention, systematic socialization, and organizational support available to the follower in the new religions. Specifically, counseling helps followers implement the world view's patterns of thought, action, and emotion, and rewards them for doing so.Within the SGI, this is the whole "guidance" framework buttressing the (non)discussion meetings as a consistent source of indoctrination, I mean "support".
The question why this world view of the new religions arose as a pervasive orientation at the end of the Tokugawa period (1603–1867) is quite remarkable. In large part the new religions themselves are responsible for its propagation. In addition, however, it harmonized well with social institutions and mores prevalent before 1945. ... The family system as codified in the Meiji Civil Code of 1898 embodied a familistic ethic closely resembling that of the new religions. No doubt these religions were greatly supported by the promulgation of this ethic by the pre-1945 educational system. Even when compulsory education dropped morality courses from the curriculum, the new religions continued to preach much the same content, shorn of chauvinistic rhetoric about the divinity of the emperor and the sacrality of the Japanese nation.Indeed. In 1986, when this book was published, Icky was 58 years old. While the Soka Gakkai started out as a "young" movement, the fact that Ikeda held onto power as he aged and never ever "passed the baton" to a younger successor or "turned the reins over to the youth" meant that the Soka Gakkai was doomed to become old and stale. Perhaps it was only the fact of Toda's death at this same age (58) that enabled the Soka Gakkai new religion to ever gain a reputation as a "young movement"; Toda held onto all the power and control until his own death, though it seems more a function of his leadership and less akin to Ikeda's pathological grasping, and it was a lucky break for Icky that Toda cacked it so early. Otherwise, he'd have been left like poor Harada, who only became President of the Soka Gakkai when he was already retirement age, 65 years old. Soka Gakkai is now an elderly, declining organization, and that's because Ikeda chose to gather ALL power and control to himself and KEEP it until his own death. Hardly "progressive" or "visionary"!
In all the new religions, persons over about fifty years of age occupy most positions of leadership, and the consequences of this fact are weighty.
These individuals were educated under the prewar system, and they have received as part of their primary education a view of the family as a microcosm of the nation, of its roles as pervaded with a sacred character, paralleling a view of Japan as a divine nation. They tend to see the family in terms of the ie rather than in terms of the nuclear family, and to regard its organizational principles as sharing the quality of sacredness.This "ie" concept is unfamiliar; in the West, it is most closely approximated by Britain's noble families, such as the "House of Windsor".
This is an interesting angle, because perhaps you may recall the incident, immortalized in whatever form in the original "The Human Revolution" novel series, when Toda approached Ikeda's father and asked him to "give" Ikeda to him - Ikeda's father sounded quite overjoyed to be rid of Ikeda. It was Toda who arranged Ikeda's marriage. Toda was clearly acting as "the head of household" here.when the ie or household system dominated in Japan. According to this system, the eldest son was responsible for the social and economic well-being of everyone living under his household, including parents, spouses, children, and siblings. This was considered particularly important in the years leading up and during World War II when “the government re-emphasized the virtue of the ie system by claiming strong family unions to be the basis of a nation ruled by the emperor, the head of all families.” During this time, almost all marriages were either arranged or approved of by the head of household. Source
Similarly, Ikeda claimed to be "father" of everyone in the Soka Gakkai/SGI, quite possibly in preparation for replacing Japan's Emperor with himself.
Here is a bit more on the "ie" system - you'll be able to see some of the aspects of SGI that seemed odd while you were "in", I think:
Thus it is not simply efficient or proprietous to obey elders, for women to defer to men, or to maintain clear role distinctions between men and women. It is sacred; failure to uphold these principles is immoral and worthy of censure.This mentality is behind former SGI-USA national women's leader Akemi Bailey-Haynie's statements about the "ironclad" (as she put it) four divisional system. She knew which side her bread was buttered on, so naturally she was going to lean all the way in.
It's the Ikeda way...and of course Ikeda is THE ultimate "elite", the BETTER "Buddha" than any of YOU losers could ever hope to become. No one will ever equal the "eternal mentor", and don't even fantasize about surpassing him, because you can't. That's SGI DOCTRINE. It's Ikeda's game and no one else gets to play, even when he isn't here any more.the SGI’s attempts to feign social progressivism.
SGI attracts many progressive leaning people, because the teachings appear to be democratic and universal. (How many of you heard that Nichiren Buddhism was the only school of Buddhism that held women could also attain enlightenment? I did, too many times to count.) Large gatherings in my area were notably diverse - racially, socioeconomically, and country of origin. The SGI also positions itself as an egalitarian organization without an elite Priesthood class. Everyone is a Buddha - and therefore a spiritual equal. The never-ending propagation focus is inclusive - much in the way of the Borg. Prepare to be assimilated!
All of this masks an utterly authoritarian, patriarchal, Japanese-controlled, socially regressive organization that says one thing and does quite another.
Regarding the "ie" structure of Japan's hundreds-of-years-old family businesses:That the SGI would have an affinity group for LBGTQ members that simulates inclusion - and simultaneously maintain the divisional structure that is by definition exclusionary - is as dysfunctional as it gets. Source
For SGI to devise a special group for LBGTQNAA members ("Courageous Freedom", whatever THAT means) that is supposed to represent inclusion, while simultaneously maintaining a divisional structure that BY DEFINITION excludes them - proves that this show of "inclusion" is nothing more than a façade, window-dressing to promote itself and conceal its rotten core, while the "ironclad" dysfunction of the SGI remains unchanged. Source
With regard to that last point, that was apparently the basis for counting all new converts as "households" - they were expected to convert everyone in their family to Soka Gakkai. The Ikeda cult took that as a given, which actually makes some sense, given the pre-war school indoctrination the leaders of the Soka Gakkai had all experienced; as stated above, it harmonized well with social institutions and mores prevalent before 1945.The logic of the “ie” system can be described with the following points:
- The primary objective of the parties in the “ie” relationship is to survive and prosper. The “ie” is neither a contractual venture whose objective is to maximize profit nor is it a venture which can be liquidated after squeezing it dry.
- Ideally, the “ie” must last forever, and as the “ie” prospers so does the family. Therefore, if the “ie” does not exist, neither can the family.
- It is the parents’ responsibility according to the “ie” to continue to have it prosper for the welfare of the family. In a certain sense, it is feudalistic, whereby the parents give children unconditional orders, and the children receive unconditional support.
- The “ie” is an organization in which members will give their all for the benefit of the “ie” by sacrificing their own personal benefits.
- Each “ie” has its specific precepts, habits, and culture. Members are brought up under the same philosophy, or religion, to create a strong team.
Unfortunately for Ikeda and the Soka Gakkai, the appeal of this kind of structure was losing strength post-WWII; it's easy to see Toda's wisdom in declaring in the 1950s that, "If we don't achieve 𝘬𝘰̄𝘴𝘦𝘯-𝘳𝘶𝘧𝘶 within Japan within the next 25 or 26 years, it's game over." The Soka Gakkai's success in taking over Japan ("kosen-rufu") depended upon that conditioning that was no longer happening in the schools or in the family. Ikeda believed he was great enough that he'd be able to overcome the fading of that all-important cultural conditioning within the population after 1945, and somehow "win" against the odds. He didn't.
The new religions continue to think of the ie as the model for family relations. That is, the idea of a corporate body passed from generation to generation, engaged in a common means of subsistence, its eternality symbolically manifest in the cult of ancestors, continues to be the conceptual norm.And there you have it!
Conversion is almost entirely limited to urban areas.
Large corporations in Japan typically screen prospective employees to eliminate members of the new religions. There is an inherent conflict between these two types of organizaitions, based upon a paradoxical similarity. The company at its largest and most elaborate seeks to accommodate nearly every need of its employees until the time of retirement, with a corresponding claim upon their loyalties and to a lesser extent, those of their families. Thus individuals already committed to a creed and to an organization over which the company has no control are suspect and probably unable to commit themselves to the extent of someone who has no such commitment. But it is necessary to recall that only a small proportion of the work force is employed by large corporations. The new religions provide ladders of prestige and reward for achievement, and this is a potent source of their appeal. ... Much as a man rises through the ranks in a company, members of the new religions can win reward and recognition that might well be beyond their reach in secular society. Since secular success so often depends heavily upon education and personal connections, persons lacking these may find themselves barred from many opportunities.
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Hey, so you ever get a birthday present that's so not your style, but you really can't return it because it'd be really awkward? Normally it's like, I dunno. Shoes, or shirts or something like that, right?
For me it was four fire-breathing horses.
Okay, so I should clarify. My dad didn't really give me four fire-breathing ponies to keep. It was more of a test for him to treat me like his son again.
See, I just recently got out of a Styx oath that would have led me to eternal damnation if I didn't fulfill it. It's a long story, but to keep it short: I swore an oath on the Styx to be a brave hero by my eighteenth birthday when I really should have just pinkie promised. But yeah. My dad, God of War and dad of the year took it well. …In that he pretty much said that I was a waste of space, disowned me and he'd personally hand me over to the Styx for eternal damnation.
Nice guy. Really should get into motivational speeches.
The night before, after riding the high of not having the threat of being sent to Super Hell I had a pretty bad dream. I mean, it wasn’t the normal David nightmare. It wasn't me killing endless hordes of monsters while my dad laughed at how pathetic I was.
Well, half of that. It was just my dad. To be honest, rather I’d take the monsters.
He was laughing at me, with that smug face of his, in that all-leather biker outfit with the shades that made him look even more like an asshole, as if that's hard to believe.
Oh, sorry. Didn't mean to cuss. Anyways yeah. Me and my dad. Not the best relationship, even by demigod standards.
He gave me a toothy grin, like a shark’s as he circled around me. I instinctively stood up straight, at attention. As much as I hate my dad, ticking off a god is a pretty dumb thing to do. Plus, I was pretty dumbfounded to see him here in my dream of all things.
“Well, color me surprised. To be honest, boy, I thought I'd end up taking care of this myself. So, congratulations on that front. But, sorry to burst your bubble, it might be good enough for ol’ Styxy but…it’s not good enough for me. But, you know, I'm a generous guy! Prove me you're a warrior. Do that, and I'll welcome you back in the family with open arms. I even got the perfect way for you to prove yourself.”
Without warning, he tossed me a set of keys with a miniature boar-headed keychain and a really big switchblade on the end of it. I fumbled with it before slipping it into my pocket.
“An oldie but a goodie. Used to let my sons prove themselves to me all the time with this one. Now, I'm sure once you see what I got planned you'll know the rules, considering you're a fuckin’ nerd. But in case you forget…”
He lowered his shades, revealing balls of fire as he glared right at me.
“Sundown. My temple. Don't be late or I'll toss you in the Styx myself. Well! Have fun, yeah? I'm looking forward to watching you fail this one, like your last quest. Now, get up. Clock’s ticking after all…”
“Gaah!”
I snapped my eyes open, falling out of my bed and onto the hard floor under me. As soon as I hit the floor, I could hear one of my many siblings start to stir from their sleep. Immediately, my sister Tiffany started to sigh as she shot up from her bed. I could see her pastel pink sleep mask perched on her head as she glared into the darkness of the early morning. She groaned in frustration, her words cutting through the quiet of the dawn.
"What the hell are you idiots doing?"
To be fair, I could see why she’d think that. Most of my siblings were fond of pranking each other every now and then. The chaos of the Ares cabin was unmatched from most cabins, except maybe Hermes. But, when you cut off her beauty sleep, the threat of an angry Tiff was usually was enough to make nighttime a truce. Usually.
My sister rubbed her eyes and looked down at me. I sheepishly gave a smile as I rubbed my head, still sore from when it hit the floor.
"Seriously, David?"
Tiffany got out of bed and silently made her way to me. She wordlessly held out a hand and I grasped at it as she pulled me up.
"Thanks Tiff. I had this dream, where Dad called me a nerd and was talking to me about testing me now that my Styx Oath is..."
I felt something hard and metallic poke against my leg, from my sweats pocket. I pulled out the unfamiliar object and to my surprise, there were the same keys from my dream. My eyes widened as I realized that my dream was a little bit more than usual demigod stuff.
"Oh. That...wasn't a dream."
She raised an eyebrow as she looked at the keys that sat in my hand. I played with the accessories, absentmindedly feeling the boar head and the switchblade knife. She leaned in, peering at the keys as the dawn started to rise.
"What the hell are those for?"
She looked to the keys, then back at my face, and then the keys again. She looked at me as if I just said that Kronos was about to come back and throw an ice cream party courtesy of the Titans.
"You're telling me Dad gave those to you or something? You're joking. Have to be."
I shook my head, but I could see why she thought so. I was pretty sure I was near the bottom, if not at the bottom of his list of favorite kids. If I was being honest, I was pretty sure he wanted me dead more than a few times.
"Tiff, you know that I'm not exactly Dad's favorite by a long shot. Why would I say something like that and risk him getting even mad more mad at me because of my lying? Dad disowned me, remember? He mentioned something along the line in my dream that if I pass his test I'd be treated as one of his sons again but he didn't mention what it..."
The gears started turning as I looked at the keys in my hands.
”A test…keys…sundown…oh no. Oh, no.”
I immediately pocketed up my keys and started putting on my shoes. No time for pants, sweats would do just fine, I just had to make sure to take my wallet with me, considering I was going to New York now. I had to be quick or this test was over before it even started.
"No. I...I think I know what it is. But if I'm right, then shoot I gotta get going then! Before our brothers take it."
In hindsight, I probably should have told Tiff a bit about my thoughts. But, the more I delayed the more issues that could have cropped up. I just had to make sure it was safe.
"Take what? Where the hell are you going?!"
I burst out of the cabin, staring at what was in front of our cabin. I felt a bit of nervousness bubble up as my thoughts were proven true. Tiffany was close behind me as she walked outside our cabin. I looked at her face and caught an expression of wonder as whatever she was going to ask me was forgotten. Parked in front of the cabin was a red and gold Harley. The seat was white leather and gave a sorta…humany vibe to it that I did not wanna think about. Only one thing came to mind, something I knew instinctively from the moment I saw it. Dad's War Chariot.
Or as the god of war would call it, his chariot.
"I...I think dad wants me to take his ride for a spin."
I ran my hand over the cold metal, and I realized what Dad meant about the “oldie but a goodie.” A while back, before the Second Titan war ended, and all of the children of the gods had to be claimed, there was a ritual all sons of Ares went through. It was something all my brothers did at fifteen. Drive around his Chariot and return it before sundown. It wasn't easy, my Godly siblings, Phobos and Deimos both loved to mess with whoever was in charge of the chariot at the time. And you had to deal with monsters too, but overall when it came to demigod stuff it wasn’t the most dangerous around. I dunno if that says a lot about how dangerous this life can get though.
But, shortly after the then-counselor Clarisse La Rue became the first girl to do it, Dad pulled the plug. I dunno if it was good ol’ sexism, someone totaling it, or dad not wanting to let all of his kids drive his ride, either way it wasn't super common nowadays. It wasn't like he stopped, but it was something given, not a right. Dad letting me do this was him at least giving me a chance to prove myself to be one of his kids, which was more than I expected to be honest.
I took a breath as I looked at Dad’s ride, feeling a pit of unease in my stomach as I started to climb in. If it wouldn't end up with me being tormented for the rest of my short life, I'd tell him no and go back to sleep. But, telling a god no, especially my dad is a neat way to be turned into a rodent. Or a fine red paste. Or a rodent that would be turned into said paste.
Tiffany's brows furrowed as she processed my words, a layer of disbelief on her face as she chewed over it.
You? He wants you to drive it? I...that...what the hell?"
I fought off a wince as she looked at me, then the ride, then back at me again. I could tell she was a bit annoyed. I mean, yeah from her perspective I was singled out by dad to do something she probably wanted to do for a while. I felt a pit of guilt in my stomach, it wasn't fair, really. But at the same time I had to do this.
"I mean, seriously? He must be out-"
She cut herself off. Calling my dad crazy was another way to get turned into a rat that would then be turned into a fine paste. Actually a lot of things carried the threat, my dad is kinda a jerk. I sighed, figuring I might as well tell her about why Dad was doing this. I didn't wanna hide it, but it's not like I like to talk about the fact that I've been disowned for two years. She knew, most of us did. But it's not something I like bringing up, because yeah. It sucks.
"I read a bit about previous Ares campers. He used to do this more often, at first only his sons did, but later his daughters could. I dunno why he stopped but, this isn't really like he's doing it because he's proud of me. I'm sorta disowned, remember? He said if I can drive the chariot, he'll take me back as one of you guys again. It's...more of a test to earn myself back into his good graces, I think.”
Tiffany listened to my explanation, not saying anything for a bit She looked a bit bothered about the fact that I was chosen to drive the Chariot, which again, not surprising.
"Ugh, I guess that makes sense."
I could hear the frustration in her voice as she crossed her arms. I winced again, preparing for her to resent or hate me. But to my surprise, I heard her add more in a softer voice.
"Well, don't get yourself killed trying to pass this stupid test, I don't want to have to explain to everyone why you're not coming back."
Her icy tone defrosted as she looked back at me with a bit of concern in her eyes. She seemed less annoyed and more worried about me, which was sweet. Not that I'd let her hear that. I hoped that maybe, dad would let her give it for a spin later down the road. If anyone deserved it, it would be her. I gave a nervous laugh as I took the keys out of my pocket.
"Of course, I passed my Styx Oath, didn't I? It'd be really dumb of me to die right after barely avoiding that, right? Oh, yeah. If Ellie asks for me, tell her about dad's little test he has for me. Hopefully it won't be too long but you know how it is with godly stuff. I should be back in time for us to hang out for the rest of my birthday once I do this for dad. I'll bring back something cool!”
I felt my trepidation fade away as I prepared to drive. Lots of my siblings dreamed of piloting the chariot. It wouldn't be right to reject the opportunity when it was given to me. And, who knows? Getting back in Dad's good graces (or as much as one can get in them) might help me out. At least I would have one less target on my back. As I sat down in the white leather seat, I put the keys in the ignition and instantly it began to morph.
OOC:Read this while listening to whats coming up
The front split apart into one steel horse that slowly split into two, and then four cream-colored horses that looked around with a cruel intelligence. The seat dipped, and warped before it became a horse-drawn chariot I was now standing in. The chariot was gold and blood red, adorned with the lovely images of people dying gruesome deaths, because Dad's taste in decor is somewhere between military surplus and serial killer, apparently.
“Okay…so, I need to get to Dad's temple before sundown. I don't know New York highways though, so how can I…oh hey! A gps!”
My fingers brushed against a touch screen set up on the chariot and punched The Intrepid into the coordinates. I gave one last wave to my sister before I lashed the horses and they immediately took off. I led them out of camp easily enough, but as we reached the highway they sped up to an impossible speed for a chariot. Their speed was even faster than any cars on the highway, rivaling the time that Aphrodite camper drove us to the beach once. I pulled back on the reins, trying to get them to slow down. Instead, they gave a rebellious snort and went even faster.
I would like to say that I embraced my inner Ares kid and relished the challenge. But I'm not going to lie, when you end up going past 80 MPH in a chariot, you tend to think you're going to die, fun fact. I screamed for most of the way, yanking and pulling at their reins so we could bob and weave through traffic.
It's a bit of a drive from Camp Half-Blood to New York City, I know it well, it’s a pretty common place for me to go for some monster slaying. But, up until now, I've been in the passenger seat while Argus drives. The speed of the horses really made the time go by faster. As we entered the city, the horses started to slow down and I felt a ray of hope as I started to steer them through the city. I gave a triumphant laugh as I looked down at my ETA. It was surprisingly quick, considering how congested New York can get. And I didn't see hide or hair of either one of my godly brothers, so I felt pretty good, all things considered.
“Huh. That's weird. There's not many cars today…my luck must be turning around!”
“Traffic update: Incoming Monsters. Rerouting. Cannot reroute.”
“Huh?”
Immediately, a massive boar the size of a garbage truck burst from a nearby alley way behind me. Behind the massive pig, two armored bank cars recklessly merged into traffic. One leaned out, revealing a gray-skinned human in body armor brandishing a shotgun.
“Of course! I had to open my big mouth! Is there anything that I’m going to have to deal with?”
“You are on the fastest route!”
“Well that’s just GREAT! Now I can be on the quickest way to the underworld!”
”Rerouting to: D.O.A. Records, Los Angeles.”
“Woah, woah, woah, no! Keep me on The Intrepid! The Intrepid!”
Seeing all these enemies together though, I started to put a thought in my head. They all had something in common, now that I saw them all in front of me. A boar was sacred to Ares, Spartoi too came from a dragon sacred to him. I put the pieces together as I saw the monsters come out of the woodwork and all to me. Now things made sense. The lack of Phobos and Deimos, the sacred beings to Ares, the lack of mortals on the street.
I didn't see my siblings because Dad wanted to mess with me personally.
Even now, I don't know if he wanted to test me in a Spartan way, or if he just wanted to get rid of me without kinslaying. Either way, I couldn't back down now. Not when I was so close. I snapped on the reins and the rebellious horses continued on their path, bickering and weaving left and right as they snorted and whinnied.
I heard the wiz of something traveling through the air and quickly moved out of the way. A metal feather hit the chariot, bouncing off the hull and onto the ground. I looked up and saw a few birds. They were black and crow-like, but their feathers had a metallic sheen, like iron. Their wings flapped and I heard the sound of metal on metal as they soared above me.
“Dad called in feather-shooters too? Come on!”
I steered left and right as I evaded the metal feathers shooting at me. The newcomers behind me quickly gained as I bobbed and weaved. I had to figure a way out of this, and fast. Problem was, I was quickly outnumbered and outmatched. I wasn't the best at archery, and my sword could shoot a blast of force, courtesy of the then Forgemaster. Main issue was it took a bit to charge, and I couldn't take them on so high up.
I couldn't run. I needed to fight out of this. But even if I could fight the two Spartoi and the big pig, the problem was the birds. I didn't have a ranged option…or did I? I looked to the horses, breathing embers as they huffed and pulled the chariot further on. Ares kids couldn't talk to horses, but these were godly horses. They seemed smarter than your average horse. Maybe I could talk them into behaving, the same way I got some of my siblings to listen to the plan during Capture the Flag.
“Hey guys, are you bored? I'm sure Dad and my brothers take all the good fights, huh? You know, if you guys continue fighting each other, I might lose this and you guys will miss out on a good fight.”
At first, I thought it fell on deaf ears. But then, they stopped their jostling and started to take a more unified path as we raced along the streets. Like I thought, they enjoyed a good fight as much as their owner did.
“That's what I like to see. Look, we're pretty surrounded right now. What do you say we rampage a bit before I take you guys home?”
An evil-sounding whinny came from the horses. I couldn’t really speak horse, but I took that as an okay and pointed at the birds above us. Did I feel stupid? Kinda. But as long as it worked, I couldn’t complain.
“See them? All yours. I'll cover you guys from the ground forces, and in exchange, you guys fall in line. Alright?”
A burst of fire came from one of the horses in response and I heard a loud squawk as it engulfed one of the feather-shooters. I breathed a sigh in relief as the rest of the birds started to scatter. They veered left and right in an attempt to avoid the flaming streams that were now sporadically being fired in their direction.
“Alright! Good job, I'll leave it to you!”
I gave a smile as I turned behind to my land-based foes, quickly gaining on me. I could hear the occasional woosh of fire as the horses fought the birds. One of the armored trucks caught up to my right and one of the spartoi leaned out of the vehicle. They aimed down the sights and pointed their shotgun at me.
“Sudden traffic in your area. You will be delayed by…five minutes. You are still on the fastest route!”
“Woah, that’s not fair! Come on Dad! A gun? Really!?”
I felt a tug in my stomach. It wasn’t something I could do a lot in a row without being exhausted, but I had some sorta pull when it came to weapons. When I gave a command, they were able to fall right out of their owner’s hands.
“Alright, let’s even the playerfield shall we?”
I held out my hand and they dropped it, the gun fell onto the ground, crushed by the wheels of the car. The second caught up to my left and once again, a spartoi leaned out of their car, weapon in hand.
“Another one!? Come on! How am I going to…”
I was jerked to the side as the horses suddenly veered right. At first, I thought it was the horses misbehaving again, but then a monstrous squeal came from behind me, rushing forwards.
Crash
I heard the sound of steel groaning as the boar rushed past the truck, pushing their truck out of the way as they aggressively charged forward. It was a good thing I managed to get out of the way, or else I would have been in trouble. I could see the spartoi shaking their fist as they spun out, their car massively dented with a massive gash in the armor. Now that I had to deal with two enemies, I decided to use the boar’s momentum to my advantage. I pulled back on the reins and the boar kept barreling on, too fast to stop as I made the chariot suddenly stop and then take a sudden turn away from the temple. The boar ran straight into a brick wall, seemingly dazed but otherwise okay.
”Rerouting...”
That temporarily took care of two of my enemies. Now that I had one to worry about, and my horses were pretty steady, I could start this fight in earnest. I kept one hand on the reins as I grabbed my Miku keychain. I unclipped it, and the keychain turned into a katana, with said keychain still on the bottom. It was my sword, Anime (I want to clarify, my friend Jules named it, not me). One of the Spartoi readied a spear and lunged at me. I parried it with my blade, and stabbed at their chest. I felt my blade plunge into their body. I pulled away at it, slashing at it again to tear it apart. To my disappointment though, the monster quickly reformed.
I don't know what I expected, to be honest. They wouldn't be much of an immortal soldier if they died after the first hit. But it bought me valuable time as we pushed forward. Almost as soon as its bones knit back together, it struck at me. I guarded once again, my sword starting to glow brighter and brighter with each strike. Our blades clashed and separated again and again for, I don’t know how long to be honest. I was putting up a good fight, but I just couldn’t gain the upperhand in that fight. For starters, if it was a monster or even a demigod it’d be ten ways to Tartarus at the moment. But, no matter how I sliced or diced it, the immortal soldier kept on coming back. Also, I just wasn't used to multitasking like that, I held on as tightly as I could, but the brief times I practiced Chariot combat with my friends Jules and Cel, I was either driving or fighting. Both at the same time was hard, and I was lucky that the horses were so cooperative.
I heard the whinny of one of the horses ahead as I looked back to the front. No sign of the birds meant that there was a few extra-crispy feather-shooters along the road somewhere, which was good news. But then, I looked out in front and realized that there was a big problem. One of the trucks we left behind somehow got in front of us, blocking the road with their car. Five spartoi were standing outside of the car, swords and spears drawn as they headed the chariot off.
At this moment, I knew I was screwed. I was too fast to just stop. And, even if I did stop, I’d have to deal with all the angry skeleton men chasing me down. I just winced, bracing for impact. But then, I heard a neigh as the horses pulling my chariot started to turn into steel and combined once more. The chariot started to shift, the creak of metal folding and turning. I quickly sheathed my sword as the reins turned into chrome handlebars which I gripped like my life depended on it. The chariot continued to morph until once again it was a motorcycle with flame patterns. I veered as left as I could, narrowly avoiding hitting the side of a nearby building as I sped past the skeletal blockade. I braked, motorcycle now turning back into the chariot form as I turned back and watched as the car that was chasing me slammed straight into the other.
The now pissed spartoi stumbled out of the wreckage and started to scream undead obscenities to each other. I couldn’t speak ghost, but whatever they said seemed to be pretty rude, because both sides started to unsheath their swords and get into an all-out brawl. One of the spartoi sliced the other in two, and they didn’t reform this time as their essence slid into their black sword.
Huh. Well, that was one way to deal with them.
“Whew! Good horses.”
I turned, ready to snap the reins once again, but I stopped as I saw what was waiting for me at the other end of the road. The boar, still very much on my trail stood in front of me. It pawed at the ground in front of it, and my horses started to do the same. I stared at the boar, unsheathing Anime once again as we stared off.
“Keep straight for…500 feet.”
The thing about boars is that they can be pretty deadly. They’re brutish and aggressive, and they go down fighting. You know the crossguard that’s near the pointy end of a spear? That’s so the animal doesn’t run up the spear to take you out with it. You don’t think them being that dangerous, but there’s a reason that dad’s symbol is a boar.
I had to make this quick, and efficient or I’d end up maimed, or worse. I snapped the reins one more time, and the horses started to dash down the street. The boar squealed as it barreled to me. I could see it get closer and closer. I grit my teeth, holding my blade in my right hand as it started to shine more and more brightly. My hand held onto the grip tightly, bracing for my next action.
I’d have one shot at this.
I miss, I’m dead.
I hesitate, I’m dead.
I don’t hit the vitals, I’m dead.
Time started to slow around me as I watched the boar rush at the chariot, enraged as it reached the point where there was no stopping it now. I could see the powerful muscles push and pull, the beast using all its power in an attempt to off me for good. I felt heat coming from the front as all four horses breathed a stream of flames at the swine. The boar kept on charging forwards, through the fire as the flames engulfed it. An angry squeal erupted from the inferno as it lept up from the sea of flames, still on fire as it used its strong legs to clear the horses and go straight for me.
Breathe in
I felt a sense of calm wash over me as I pulled my sword hand back. My blade shined brilliantly, even in the May sun. I watched it fall ever closer to me, the flames still eating away at the flesh. I stared into its ever-angry eyes, burning brighter than the flames surrounding it. I don’t falter. I’ve faced monsters that have crushed my bones. I don’t feel fear. I’ve fought creatures that could have killed me in five seconds. This is it. I need it to be perfect.
Breathe out.
SHING
I swung my blade and a rush of air followed it, making an arc that flew to the boar. I don’t doubt my skills. I simply watch, confident that this will end the monster once and for all. The blast, charged from my fight flew unimpeded. The beast’s chuffs turned into surprised squeal as it sliced the boar cleanly in two, bisecting it from the snout down. I sheathed my sword and put both hands back on the reins, eyes on the road as I barely watched what came next. The flaming boar started to fade into dust, still falling through the air until only a tusk was left. I held out my arm and caught it with my right hand.
“Oh hot, hot!”
I juggled it a bit with one hand before placing it down on the chariot floor. I grinned triumphantly as I realized what happened. Dad tried to test me, to see if I was “worthy” or he genuinely tried to kill me. Either way, I beat him this time, proving to him that I was more. That he underestimated me when we first met, that I was a brave warrior all along. In the end, I proved to him that I could fulfill my Styx oath even past what was expected of me. I laughed as I sped up, I felt pretty good about my victory. I wondered how his face would look, or if I could read his expression past his dumb sunglasses.
But as I rounded the corner, a terrifying sight came to my face as my glee turned to sorrow. I watched with horror as I realized Dad’s influence on the fight kept a more dangerous foe than any before at bay. Now that the fight was over, he had no reason to keep it around, and for once, I wasn’t sure if I could get through this unscathed. I gulped as I put my hands on the reins, not ready to face the impossible challenge alone. I hoped it wouldn’t break me as I prepared what little I had to fight this foe.
”There is an unusual amount of traffic in your area today.”
“Now you tell me…”
None other, than New York traffic.
I’d like to say that I did something else. Like I defeated an army of drakons on my way, or managed to fight off crazed demigods sent by my dad…but no. It was pretty much just traffic the rest of the way there. It was long and arduous, but I managed to make my way over to The Intrepid. After that traffic,I had to say, the amount of crazy drivers was almost San Francisco bad. I’d have taken as many spartoi and boars as dad could throw at me, if it meant I wasn’t drowning in the sea of cars. I drove down Pier 86, feeling a sense of relief as I got closer and closer to the aircraft carrier turned museum. As I got within eyeshot, I realized that dad said to take it to the temple, but not where to drop it off at.
It would be really stupid to end up failing just because I wasn’t sure where to leave dad’s ride. I got off the chariot, and was eyeing the prices of a ticket.
“Adults are thirty-six, Seniors and College Students…thirty four… Oh hey! Children of Ares get in free! Now, how do I wheel dad’s chariot through the front…”
Suddenly the side gate opened, lights flashing and clanging as it automatically retracted. The person standing in the booth waved me over and I hopped back onto the chariot, driving it by cautiously. They were dressed like a security guard, shades covering their eyes as they looked down onto their phone that they were absentmindedly playing with. Eyebrow piercings peeked out from behind the shades. They were tall, looked about early twenties, and seemed like your average bored museum guard, if not for that sorta godly aura I got from them.
“Take the chariot this way, Lord Ares will be at the end of Pier 86. Can’t miss him.”
I eyed the godling suspiciously. They seemed like one of those myriad younger and minor gods I saw when I was on Olympus. Not anyone I’d know, but if they wanted to stop me, it’d be annoying to get past them. They didn’t seem to be that dangerous, at least right now. But when you were a demigod, you learned to be wary of free handouts.
“Uh…look man, I’m going to be honest. I just got through some hellish traffic to get through here. So if like, you’re leading me into a trap or if my godly brothers are going to show up to try and take this, can you just start the fight and save me the trouble? It’s been a long morning, and I just wanna get this over with.”
I stared back at my reflection through their mirrored shades. Growing up, I always thought of myself as gangly and awkward. I could see my messed up hair, tousled from the wind. I stood tall, and although I wasn’t the buffest Ares kid around, you couldn’t call me skinny anymore. I looked almost heroic as I held the reins atop the chariot. Was that how I looked now? The godling shook their head as they chuckled, putting down their phone as they looked at me in the eyes.
“Kid, even for a god like Ares who likes conflict, you don’t do something like that in a temple. You can’t just attack his kid on his own grounds. Plus, it's part of the rules of war to respect neutralized zones. Trust me, you’re home free.”
“Oh. Um, thank you.”
He nodded and went back on his phone. I snapped on the reins and the chariot trotted along, even fire-breathing horses had to follow traffic laws apparently. I was on guard, not taking the godling’s words at face value. Mortals in a daze parted around the chariot, a few snapping pictures at me. I freaked out for a split second before I heard the tourists being in awe at what I heard to be a “vintage bomber”. Dumbfounded, I stopped for a brief second. It didn’t even have wings! But, I could see the mist shimmer around me and for a brief moment, see the silhouette of the plane around the chariot. It was an old fighter, a single propellor with flaming horse art on the nose.
“P-40B Warhawk? Alright, guess we’re working with that.”
I frowned a bit, trying to think if I knew that before this, from a school project or if it was more demigod shenanigans. I was never into fighter jets, but when you’re a demigod sometimes your parent’s godly influence shoves itself into your head and it’s always confusing when it does.
I drove the “plane” to the end of the pier, where I could see my dad sitting down on a barricade, blocking off a massive plane above him. It wasn’t used for war apparently, because I had no clue what type of plane it was. Looked cool though, it was really narrow around the nose end and the wings were all near the back end. He had a big wicked-looking combat knife in his hand that he used to clean his nails. He looked up at me, disinterestedly, before going back down to the knife.
“You’re alive.”
I couldn’t tell from his tone if that was a good or bad thing. It seemed… neutral. Like he was stating the sky was blue. But, overall I’d take that as a good thing, considering our last meeting. I spoke a bit warily, not sure if he was in a good or bad mood considering my victory.
“Uh, so Father. I’m finished with what you-”
“No. You’re not.”
“I’m not!? Do I need to do anything or-”
A moment of panic snuck up into my chest. For a brief moment I was afraid he was going to pull a twelve labors on me, but then he whistled and held out his hand.
“Not until you give me the keys kid, then it’s done.”
I hopped out of the chariot, the reins in my hand turning into keys as the horses went back into their motorcycle form. I somewhat clumsily tossed it to my dad, who grabbed it. He pushed himself off his perch, first making sure his motorcycle was unharmed. Then, he turned to me, eying me up and down as he circled around where I stood. I stood still, at attention as I felt my heart racing in my chest. I felt like a deer, cornered by a wolf just waiting to strike. Yet, the first pang of anxiety soon settled down. If he wanted to take care of me, he would have done so already. Or sent something more dangerous like a Drakon at me when I was driving. I felt my heart leap up into my throat as he clapped a big hand on my shoulder. The gesture wasn’t hostile, if anything, the motion seemed friendly. But his grip was anything but. His hand, like the claws of a tiger dug into my shoulder as he grinned at me.
“I have to say, I thought you were a lost cause, but look at you kid. Took you long enough, but I guess you have enough of me in you after all. Well, a late bloomer is better than being completely useless, but man! You were one of my most pathetic kids when you took that oath. I don’t think I had a kid as wimpy as you in a long time. Well, I’m glad my little nudge helped you keep that oath up after all. It would have been a waste of a perfectly good warrior if you didn’t shape up.”
I looked at him, dumbfounded. He helped me? He didn’t do anything! I wasn’t stupid enough to point it out, but I guess he knew what I was thinking as I felt his grip tighten as he growled.
“Come on, don’t give me that look, kid. Oh, don’t look so surprised. Tip of advice: don’t dip your toes into cards. You have a horrible poker face. Your mom was the same way. But, yes. I helped. Not that kids these days would understand. Parents these days are too soft, including most of us gods. Back in Sparta, we’d leave our kids to fend for themselves. Just give them barely enough food and let them hunt or steal the rest. If they end up dying in the hunt or starved, well that’s fine. They were too weak to do anything of note anyway. You should consider yourself lucky I was generous enough to just turn my back on you.”
He chuckled low, and my blood ran cold as he shook me. I shook my head, fighting off a wave of dizziness as he threatened to take off my arm.
“Oh, but that’s in the past! You passed your agōgē period, all by yourself. Now that is true strength.”
His evil grin widened as he gave me the closest thing to an approved look he’d ever given me. I furrowed my brow as I shook my head. This credit, it wasn’t mine to take, was it? Before I could think, I spoke what was on my mind.
“I’m sorry, but I didn’t do this by myself. Everywhere I went, I had someone to help me out. If it wasn’t for the help from my friends, I don’t think I would be standing here. I didn’t-”
My dad’s good mood instantly soured as his grin warped into a snarl. His grip, although somewhat friendly now seemed dangerously tight as he frustratingly interrupted me.
“Oh for the love of! I’m complimenting you, kid. Look. I don’t care about those other twerps one way or another. Allies are fine enough in war, as long as you don’t make them do all the work. Kid, you’ve gotten strong all on your own, like a true son of mine. Don’t deny you and me the kleos you rightfully deserve ever again. Shut up and just take the honor.”
“I…uh…yes, Dad.”
I was surprised that all it accounted to was a mild scolding. My dad, too seemed to calm down after I agreed with his words, as he went back to a smile. He put his hand back into his pocket as he started to walk up to his chariot. He ran his finger across the chrome finish, taking out a cloth and cleaning off my fingerprints from the metal.
“About your joyride. Not bad, not bad at all. It took you a bit to embrace your birthright, but you ended up not even scratching my ride. Nice. Nice. Saves me the trouble of buffing it out. Now, if you could only stop complaining at everything that opposed you. You’re a man, aren’t you David? Start acting like it. If you think a bag of bones and a pig are hard, just wait until your future. The stronger a warrior gets, the stronger their foes get. Make sure you’re strong enough to stand up against them before you end up a stain on the pavement.”
I heard the engine rev as he got into the seat. He threw a bag at me that I clumsily fumbled with before I fully caught it. I opened it, and a few golden drachmas shined back at me.
“Since your agōgē finished up, consider yourself un-cut off. Even I’m not heartless enough to leave a son of mine stranded in New York. Keep the rest. Feel free to hang around my temple, and help yourself to the gift shop if you want, it’s on the house, happy birthday and all that. Just don’t go overboard.”
He turned the motorcycle, wheeling it around so he could leave the pier. He turned around, giving me a few more parting words he shouted over the roar of the engine.
“Don’t think you’re done yet, David. You got a lot more to grow. Especially now that you can receive my blessings again. What, did you think that taking a good hit was all you can do? You’ll see sooner or later. See ya kid! Don’t disappoint me.”
He revved his engine one more time and took off, leaving me behind on the pier. As I watched my dad leave, I realized that with that resolved, the last of what made my Styx Oath so suffocating was finally finished. A part of me felt that I’d always keep the consequences of it with me. Either dad would continue to disown me, or I’d be horribly injured from my jobs. But, to my surprise, everything worked out alright. I worked as hard as I could, and now everything was over, truly over. I…wasn’t sure how I felt about it. I mean, like obviously I didn’t wanna have them with me for the rest of my life. But, for all of my oath’s lifespan I had the deadline looming overhead, and my expectation was that something would happen to me as a result. I was glad to have it over with, but I never felt that I could relax until now. The feeling of not having the anxiety of my imminent demise was something I wasn’t familiar with, and to be honest I still have trouble relaxing. As he disappeared into the afternoon traffic, I realized that, so too did my previous life.
Maybe…maybe I could afford to enjoy my life now after all.
OOC: And there we have it! The final David storymode relevant to this storyline! I meant to have this yesterday but I didn't see the modmail that gave me the okay until literally an hour ago oop. Which means that yes, the Chariot and Ares both are approved from the mods.
Big thank you to Tiffany's writer, angelspoint for helping me with her parts, I had a blast working with them! Hope you enjoyed David's Victory lap!
submitted by FFRBP777 to CampHalfBloodRP [link] [comments]
For me it was four fire-breathing horses.
Okay, so I should clarify. My dad didn't really give me four fire-breathing ponies to keep. It was more of a test for him to treat me like his son again.
See, I just recently got out of a Styx oath that would have led me to eternal damnation if I didn't fulfill it. It's a long story, but to keep it short: I swore an oath on the Styx to be a brave hero by my eighteenth birthday when I really should have just pinkie promised. But yeah. My dad, God of War and dad of the year took it well. …In that he pretty much said that I was a waste of space, disowned me and he'd personally hand me over to the Styx for eternal damnation.
Nice guy. Really should get into motivational speeches.
The night before, after riding the high of not having the threat of being sent to Super Hell I had a pretty bad dream. I mean, it wasn’t the normal David nightmare. It wasn't me killing endless hordes of monsters while my dad laughed at how pathetic I was.
Well, half of that. It was just my dad. To be honest, rather I’d take the monsters.
He was laughing at me, with that smug face of his, in that all-leather biker outfit with the shades that made him look even more like an asshole, as if that's hard to believe.
Oh, sorry. Didn't mean to cuss. Anyways yeah. Me and my dad. Not the best relationship, even by demigod standards.
He gave me a toothy grin, like a shark’s as he circled around me. I instinctively stood up straight, at attention. As much as I hate my dad, ticking off a god is a pretty dumb thing to do. Plus, I was pretty dumbfounded to see him here in my dream of all things.
“Well, color me surprised. To be honest, boy, I thought I'd end up taking care of this myself. So, congratulations on that front. But, sorry to burst your bubble, it might be good enough for ol’ Styxy but…it’s not good enough for me. But, you know, I'm a generous guy! Prove me you're a warrior. Do that, and I'll welcome you back in the family with open arms. I even got the perfect way for you to prove yourself.”
Without warning, he tossed me a set of keys with a miniature boar-headed keychain and a really big switchblade on the end of it. I fumbled with it before slipping it into my pocket.
“An oldie but a goodie. Used to let my sons prove themselves to me all the time with this one. Now, I'm sure once you see what I got planned you'll know the rules, considering you're a fuckin’ nerd. But in case you forget…”
He lowered his shades, revealing balls of fire as he glared right at me.
“Sundown. My temple. Don't be late or I'll toss you in the Styx myself. Well! Have fun, yeah? I'm looking forward to watching you fail this one, like your last quest. Now, get up. Clock’s ticking after all…”
“Gaah!”
I snapped my eyes open, falling out of my bed and onto the hard floor under me. As soon as I hit the floor, I could hear one of my many siblings start to stir from their sleep. Immediately, my sister Tiffany started to sigh as she shot up from her bed. I could see her pastel pink sleep mask perched on her head as she glared into the darkness of the early morning. She groaned in frustration, her words cutting through the quiet of the dawn.
"What the hell are you idiots doing?"
To be fair, I could see why she’d think that. Most of my siblings were fond of pranking each other every now and then. The chaos of the Ares cabin was unmatched from most cabins, except maybe Hermes. But, when you cut off her beauty sleep, the threat of an angry Tiff was usually was enough to make nighttime a truce. Usually.
My sister rubbed her eyes and looked down at me. I sheepishly gave a smile as I rubbed my head, still sore from when it hit the floor.
"Seriously, David?"
Tiffany got out of bed and silently made her way to me. She wordlessly held out a hand and I grasped at it as she pulled me up.
"Thanks Tiff. I had this dream, where Dad called me a nerd and was talking to me about testing me now that my Styx Oath is..."
I felt something hard and metallic poke against my leg, from my sweats pocket. I pulled out the unfamiliar object and to my surprise, there were the same keys from my dream. My eyes widened as I realized that my dream was a little bit more than usual demigod stuff.
"Oh. That...wasn't a dream."
She raised an eyebrow as she looked at the keys that sat in my hand. I played with the accessories, absentmindedly feeling the boar head and the switchblade knife. She leaned in, peering at the keys as the dawn started to rise.
"What the hell are those for?"
She looked to the keys, then back at my face, and then the keys again. She looked at me as if I just said that Kronos was about to come back and throw an ice cream party courtesy of the Titans.
"You're telling me Dad gave those to you or something? You're joking. Have to be."
I shook my head, but I could see why she thought so. I was pretty sure I was near the bottom, if not at the bottom of his list of favorite kids. If I was being honest, I was pretty sure he wanted me dead more than a few times.
"Tiff, you know that I'm not exactly Dad's favorite by a long shot. Why would I say something like that and risk him getting even mad more mad at me because of my lying? Dad disowned me, remember? He mentioned something along the line in my dream that if I pass his test I'd be treated as one of his sons again but he didn't mention what it..."
The gears started turning as I looked at the keys in my hands.
”A test…keys…sundown…oh no. Oh, no.”
I immediately pocketed up my keys and started putting on my shoes. No time for pants, sweats would do just fine, I just had to make sure to take my wallet with me, considering I was going to New York now. I had to be quick or this test was over before it even started.
"No. I...I think I know what it is. But if I'm right, then shoot I gotta get going then! Before our brothers take it."
In hindsight, I probably should have told Tiff a bit about my thoughts. But, the more I delayed the more issues that could have cropped up. I just had to make sure it was safe.
"Take what? Where the hell are you going?!"
I burst out of the cabin, staring at what was in front of our cabin. I felt a bit of nervousness bubble up as my thoughts were proven true. Tiffany was close behind me as she walked outside our cabin. I looked at her face and caught an expression of wonder as whatever she was going to ask me was forgotten. Parked in front of the cabin was a red and gold Harley. The seat was white leather and gave a sorta…humany vibe to it that I did not wanna think about. Only one thing came to mind, something I knew instinctively from the moment I saw it. Dad's War Chariot.
Or as the god of war would call it, his chariot.
"I...I think dad wants me to take his ride for a spin."
I ran my hand over the cold metal, and I realized what Dad meant about the “oldie but a goodie.” A while back, before the Second Titan war ended, and all of the children of the gods had to be claimed, there was a ritual all sons of Ares went through. It was something all my brothers did at fifteen. Drive around his Chariot and return it before sundown. It wasn't easy, my Godly siblings, Phobos and Deimos both loved to mess with whoever was in charge of the chariot at the time. And you had to deal with monsters too, but overall when it came to demigod stuff it wasn’t the most dangerous around. I dunno if that says a lot about how dangerous this life can get though.
But, shortly after the then-counselor Clarisse La Rue became the first girl to do it, Dad pulled the plug. I dunno if it was good ol’ sexism, someone totaling it, or dad not wanting to let all of his kids drive his ride, either way it wasn't super common nowadays. It wasn't like he stopped, but it was something given, not a right. Dad letting me do this was him at least giving me a chance to prove myself to be one of his kids, which was more than I expected to be honest.
I took a breath as I looked at Dad’s ride, feeling a pit of unease in my stomach as I started to climb in. If it wouldn't end up with me being tormented for the rest of my short life, I'd tell him no and go back to sleep. But, telling a god no, especially my dad is a neat way to be turned into a rodent. Or a fine red paste. Or a rodent that would be turned into said paste.
Tiffany's brows furrowed as she processed my words, a layer of disbelief on her face as she chewed over it.
You? He wants you to drive it? I...that...what the hell?"
I fought off a wince as she looked at me, then the ride, then back at me again. I could tell she was a bit annoyed. I mean, yeah from her perspective I was singled out by dad to do something she probably wanted to do for a while. I felt a pit of guilt in my stomach, it wasn't fair, really. But at the same time I had to do this.
"I mean, seriously? He must be out-"
She cut herself off. Calling my dad crazy was another way to get turned into a rat that would then be turned into a fine paste. Actually a lot of things carried the threat, my dad is kinda a jerk. I sighed, figuring I might as well tell her about why Dad was doing this. I didn't wanna hide it, but it's not like I like to talk about the fact that I've been disowned for two years. She knew, most of us did. But it's not something I like bringing up, because yeah. It sucks.
"I read a bit about previous Ares campers. He used to do this more often, at first only his sons did, but later his daughters could. I dunno why he stopped but, this isn't really like he's doing it because he's proud of me. I'm sorta disowned, remember? He said if I can drive the chariot, he'll take me back as one of you guys again. It's...more of a test to earn myself back into his good graces, I think.”
Tiffany listened to my explanation, not saying anything for a bit She looked a bit bothered about the fact that I was chosen to drive the Chariot, which again, not surprising.
"Ugh, I guess that makes sense."
I could hear the frustration in her voice as she crossed her arms. I winced again, preparing for her to resent or hate me. But to my surprise, I heard her add more in a softer voice.
"Well, don't get yourself killed trying to pass this stupid test, I don't want to have to explain to everyone why you're not coming back."
Her icy tone defrosted as she looked back at me with a bit of concern in her eyes. She seemed less annoyed and more worried about me, which was sweet. Not that I'd let her hear that. I hoped that maybe, dad would let her give it for a spin later down the road. If anyone deserved it, it would be her. I gave a nervous laugh as I took the keys out of my pocket.
"Of course, I passed my Styx Oath, didn't I? It'd be really dumb of me to die right after barely avoiding that, right? Oh, yeah. If Ellie asks for me, tell her about dad's little test he has for me. Hopefully it won't be too long but you know how it is with godly stuff. I should be back in time for us to hang out for the rest of my birthday once I do this for dad. I'll bring back something cool!”
I felt my trepidation fade away as I prepared to drive. Lots of my siblings dreamed of piloting the chariot. It wouldn't be right to reject the opportunity when it was given to me. And, who knows? Getting back in Dad's good graces (or as much as one can get in them) might help me out. At least I would have one less target on my back. As I sat down in the white leather seat, I put the keys in the ignition and instantly it began to morph.
OOC:Read this while listening to whats coming up
The front split apart into one steel horse that slowly split into two, and then four cream-colored horses that looked around with a cruel intelligence. The seat dipped, and warped before it became a horse-drawn chariot I was now standing in. The chariot was gold and blood red, adorned with the lovely images of people dying gruesome deaths, because Dad's taste in decor is somewhere between military surplus and serial killer, apparently.
“Okay…so, I need to get to Dad's temple before sundown. I don't know New York highways though, so how can I…oh hey! A gps!”
My fingers brushed against a touch screen set up on the chariot and punched The Intrepid into the coordinates. I gave one last wave to my sister before I lashed the horses and they immediately took off. I led them out of camp easily enough, but as we reached the highway they sped up to an impossible speed for a chariot. Their speed was even faster than any cars on the highway, rivaling the time that Aphrodite camper drove us to the beach once. I pulled back on the reins, trying to get them to slow down. Instead, they gave a rebellious snort and went even faster.
I would like to say that I embraced my inner Ares kid and relished the challenge. But I'm not going to lie, when you end up going past 80 MPH in a chariot, you tend to think you're going to die, fun fact. I screamed for most of the way, yanking and pulling at their reins so we could bob and weave through traffic.
It's a bit of a drive from Camp Half-Blood to New York City, I know it well, it’s a pretty common place for me to go for some monster slaying. But, up until now, I've been in the passenger seat while Argus drives. The speed of the horses really made the time go by faster. As we entered the city, the horses started to slow down and I felt a ray of hope as I started to steer them through the city. I gave a triumphant laugh as I looked down at my ETA. It was surprisingly quick, considering how congested New York can get. And I didn't see hide or hair of either one of my godly brothers, so I felt pretty good, all things considered.
“Huh. That's weird. There's not many cars today…my luck must be turning around!”
“Traffic update: Incoming Monsters. Rerouting. Cannot reroute.”
“Huh?”
Immediately, a massive boar the size of a garbage truck burst from a nearby alley way behind me. Behind the massive pig, two armored bank cars recklessly merged into traffic. One leaned out, revealing a gray-skinned human in body armor brandishing a shotgun.
“Of course! I had to open my big mouth! Is there anything that I’m going to have to deal with?”
“You are on the fastest route!”
“Well that’s just GREAT! Now I can be on the quickest way to the underworld!”
”Rerouting to: D.O.A. Records, Los Angeles.”
“Woah, woah, woah, no! Keep me on The Intrepid! The Intrepid!”
Seeing all these enemies together though, I started to put a thought in my head. They all had something in common, now that I saw them all in front of me. A boar was sacred to Ares, Spartoi too came from a dragon sacred to him. I put the pieces together as I saw the monsters come out of the woodwork and all to me. Now things made sense. The lack of Phobos and Deimos, the sacred beings to Ares, the lack of mortals on the street.
I didn't see my siblings because Dad wanted to mess with me personally.
Even now, I don't know if he wanted to test me in a Spartan way, or if he just wanted to get rid of me without kinslaying. Either way, I couldn't back down now. Not when I was so close. I snapped on the reins and the rebellious horses continued on their path, bickering and weaving left and right as they snorted and whinnied.
I heard the wiz of something traveling through the air and quickly moved out of the way. A metal feather hit the chariot, bouncing off the hull and onto the ground. I looked up and saw a few birds. They were black and crow-like, but their feathers had a metallic sheen, like iron. Their wings flapped and I heard the sound of metal on metal as they soared above me.
“Dad called in feather-shooters too? Come on!”
I steered left and right as I evaded the metal feathers shooting at me. The newcomers behind me quickly gained as I bobbed and weaved. I had to figure a way out of this, and fast. Problem was, I was quickly outnumbered and outmatched. I wasn't the best at archery, and my sword could shoot a blast of force, courtesy of the then Forgemaster. Main issue was it took a bit to charge, and I couldn't take them on so high up.
I couldn't run. I needed to fight out of this. But even if I could fight the two Spartoi and the big pig, the problem was the birds. I didn't have a ranged option…or did I? I looked to the horses, breathing embers as they huffed and pulled the chariot further on. Ares kids couldn't talk to horses, but these were godly horses. They seemed smarter than your average horse. Maybe I could talk them into behaving, the same way I got some of my siblings to listen to the plan during Capture the Flag.
“Hey guys, are you bored? I'm sure Dad and my brothers take all the good fights, huh? You know, if you guys continue fighting each other, I might lose this and you guys will miss out on a good fight.”
At first, I thought it fell on deaf ears. But then, they stopped their jostling and started to take a more unified path as we raced along the streets. Like I thought, they enjoyed a good fight as much as their owner did.
“That's what I like to see. Look, we're pretty surrounded right now. What do you say we rampage a bit before I take you guys home?”
An evil-sounding whinny came from the horses. I couldn’t really speak horse, but I took that as an okay and pointed at the birds above us. Did I feel stupid? Kinda. But as long as it worked, I couldn’t complain.
“See them? All yours. I'll cover you guys from the ground forces, and in exchange, you guys fall in line. Alright?”
A burst of fire came from one of the horses in response and I heard a loud squawk as it engulfed one of the feather-shooters. I breathed a sigh in relief as the rest of the birds started to scatter. They veered left and right in an attempt to avoid the flaming streams that were now sporadically being fired in their direction.
“Alright! Good job, I'll leave it to you!”
I gave a smile as I turned behind to my land-based foes, quickly gaining on me. I could hear the occasional woosh of fire as the horses fought the birds. One of the armored trucks caught up to my right and one of the spartoi leaned out of the vehicle. They aimed down the sights and pointed their shotgun at me.
“Sudden traffic in your area. You will be delayed by…five minutes. You are still on the fastest route!”
“Woah, that’s not fair! Come on Dad! A gun? Really!?”
I felt a tug in my stomach. It wasn’t something I could do a lot in a row without being exhausted, but I had some sorta pull when it came to weapons. When I gave a command, they were able to fall right out of their owner’s hands.
“Alright, let’s even the playerfield shall we?”
I held out my hand and they dropped it, the gun fell onto the ground, crushed by the wheels of the car. The second caught up to my left and once again, a spartoi leaned out of their car, weapon in hand.
“Another one!? Come on! How am I going to…”
I was jerked to the side as the horses suddenly veered right. At first, I thought it was the horses misbehaving again, but then a monstrous squeal came from behind me, rushing forwards.
Crash
I heard the sound of steel groaning as the boar rushed past the truck, pushing their truck out of the way as they aggressively charged forward. It was a good thing I managed to get out of the way, or else I would have been in trouble. I could see the spartoi shaking their fist as they spun out, their car massively dented with a massive gash in the armor. Now that I had to deal with two enemies, I decided to use the boar’s momentum to my advantage. I pulled back on the reins and the boar kept barreling on, too fast to stop as I made the chariot suddenly stop and then take a sudden turn away from the temple. The boar ran straight into a brick wall, seemingly dazed but otherwise okay.
”Rerouting...”
That temporarily took care of two of my enemies. Now that I had one to worry about, and my horses were pretty steady, I could start this fight in earnest. I kept one hand on the reins as I grabbed my Miku keychain. I unclipped it, and the keychain turned into a katana, with said keychain still on the bottom. It was my sword, Anime (I want to clarify, my friend Jules named it, not me). One of the Spartoi readied a spear and lunged at me. I parried it with my blade, and stabbed at their chest. I felt my blade plunge into their body. I pulled away at it, slashing at it again to tear it apart. To my disappointment though, the monster quickly reformed.
I don't know what I expected, to be honest. They wouldn't be much of an immortal soldier if they died after the first hit. But it bought me valuable time as we pushed forward. Almost as soon as its bones knit back together, it struck at me. I guarded once again, my sword starting to glow brighter and brighter with each strike. Our blades clashed and separated again and again for, I don’t know how long to be honest. I was putting up a good fight, but I just couldn’t gain the upperhand in that fight. For starters, if it was a monster or even a demigod it’d be ten ways to Tartarus at the moment. But, no matter how I sliced or diced it, the immortal soldier kept on coming back. Also, I just wasn't used to multitasking like that, I held on as tightly as I could, but the brief times I practiced Chariot combat with my friends Jules and Cel, I was either driving or fighting. Both at the same time was hard, and I was lucky that the horses were so cooperative.
I heard the whinny of one of the horses ahead as I looked back to the front. No sign of the birds meant that there was a few extra-crispy feather-shooters along the road somewhere, which was good news. But then, I looked out in front and realized that there was a big problem. One of the trucks we left behind somehow got in front of us, blocking the road with their car. Five spartoi were standing outside of the car, swords and spears drawn as they headed the chariot off.
At this moment, I knew I was screwed. I was too fast to just stop. And, even if I did stop, I’d have to deal with all the angry skeleton men chasing me down. I just winced, bracing for impact. But then, I heard a neigh as the horses pulling my chariot started to turn into steel and combined once more. The chariot started to shift, the creak of metal folding and turning. I quickly sheathed my sword as the reins turned into chrome handlebars which I gripped like my life depended on it. The chariot continued to morph until once again it was a motorcycle with flame patterns. I veered as left as I could, narrowly avoiding hitting the side of a nearby building as I sped past the skeletal blockade. I braked, motorcycle now turning back into the chariot form as I turned back and watched as the car that was chasing me slammed straight into the other.
The now pissed spartoi stumbled out of the wreckage and started to scream undead obscenities to each other. I couldn’t speak ghost, but whatever they said seemed to be pretty rude, because both sides started to unsheath their swords and get into an all-out brawl. One of the spartoi sliced the other in two, and they didn’t reform this time as their essence slid into their black sword.
Huh. Well, that was one way to deal with them.
“Whew! Good horses.”
I turned, ready to snap the reins once again, but I stopped as I saw what was waiting for me at the other end of the road. The boar, still very much on my trail stood in front of me. It pawed at the ground in front of it, and my horses started to do the same. I stared at the boar, unsheathing Anime once again as we stared off.
“Keep straight for…500 feet.”
The thing about boars is that they can be pretty deadly. They’re brutish and aggressive, and they go down fighting. You know the crossguard that’s near the pointy end of a spear? That’s so the animal doesn’t run up the spear to take you out with it. You don’t think them being that dangerous, but there’s a reason that dad’s symbol is a boar.
I had to make this quick, and efficient or I’d end up maimed, or worse. I snapped the reins one more time, and the horses started to dash down the street. The boar squealed as it barreled to me. I could see it get closer and closer. I grit my teeth, holding my blade in my right hand as it started to shine more and more brightly. My hand held onto the grip tightly, bracing for my next action.
I’d have one shot at this.
I miss, I’m dead.
I hesitate, I’m dead.
I don’t hit the vitals, I’m dead.
Time started to slow around me as I watched the boar rush at the chariot, enraged as it reached the point where there was no stopping it now. I could see the powerful muscles push and pull, the beast using all its power in an attempt to off me for good. I felt heat coming from the front as all four horses breathed a stream of flames at the swine. The boar kept on charging forwards, through the fire as the flames engulfed it. An angry squeal erupted from the inferno as it lept up from the sea of flames, still on fire as it used its strong legs to clear the horses and go straight for me.
Breathe in
I felt a sense of calm wash over me as I pulled my sword hand back. My blade shined brilliantly, even in the May sun. I watched it fall ever closer to me, the flames still eating away at the flesh. I stared into its ever-angry eyes, burning brighter than the flames surrounding it. I don’t falter. I’ve faced monsters that have crushed my bones. I don’t feel fear. I’ve fought creatures that could have killed me in five seconds. This is it. I need it to be perfect.
Breathe out.
SHING
I swung my blade and a rush of air followed it, making an arc that flew to the boar. I don’t doubt my skills. I simply watch, confident that this will end the monster once and for all. The blast, charged from my fight flew unimpeded. The beast’s chuffs turned into surprised squeal as it sliced the boar cleanly in two, bisecting it from the snout down. I sheathed my sword and put both hands back on the reins, eyes on the road as I barely watched what came next. The flaming boar started to fade into dust, still falling through the air until only a tusk was left. I held out my arm and caught it with my right hand.
“Oh hot, hot!”
I juggled it a bit with one hand before placing it down on the chariot floor. I grinned triumphantly as I realized what happened. Dad tried to test me, to see if I was “worthy” or he genuinely tried to kill me. Either way, I beat him this time, proving to him that I was more. That he underestimated me when we first met, that I was a brave warrior all along. In the end, I proved to him that I could fulfill my Styx oath even past what was expected of me. I laughed as I sped up, I felt pretty good about my victory. I wondered how his face would look, or if I could read his expression past his dumb sunglasses.
But as I rounded the corner, a terrifying sight came to my face as my glee turned to sorrow. I watched with horror as I realized Dad’s influence on the fight kept a more dangerous foe than any before at bay. Now that the fight was over, he had no reason to keep it around, and for once, I wasn’t sure if I could get through this unscathed. I gulped as I put my hands on the reins, not ready to face the impossible challenge alone. I hoped it wouldn’t break me as I prepared what little I had to fight this foe.
”There is an unusual amount of traffic in your area today.”
“Now you tell me…”
None other, than New York traffic.
It would be really stupid to end up failing just because I wasn’t sure where to leave dad’s ride. I got off the chariot, and was eyeing the prices of a ticket.
“Adults are thirty-six, Seniors and College Students…thirty four… Oh hey! Children of Ares get in free! Now, how do I wheel dad’s chariot through the front…”
Suddenly the side gate opened, lights flashing and clanging as it automatically retracted. The person standing in the booth waved me over and I hopped back onto the chariot, driving it by cautiously. They were dressed like a security guard, shades covering their eyes as they looked down onto their phone that they were absentmindedly playing with. Eyebrow piercings peeked out from behind the shades. They were tall, looked about early twenties, and seemed like your average bored museum guard, if not for that sorta godly aura I got from them.
“Take the chariot this way, Lord Ares will be at the end of Pier 86. Can’t miss him.”
I eyed the godling suspiciously. They seemed like one of those myriad younger and minor gods I saw when I was on Olympus. Not anyone I’d know, but if they wanted to stop me, it’d be annoying to get past them. They didn’t seem to be that dangerous, at least right now. But when you were a demigod, you learned to be wary of free handouts.
“Uh…look man, I’m going to be honest. I just got through some hellish traffic to get through here. So if like, you’re leading me into a trap or if my godly brothers are going to show up to try and take this, can you just start the fight and save me the trouble? It’s been a long morning, and I just wanna get this over with.”
I stared back at my reflection through their mirrored shades. Growing up, I always thought of myself as gangly and awkward. I could see my messed up hair, tousled from the wind. I stood tall, and although I wasn’t the buffest Ares kid around, you couldn’t call me skinny anymore. I looked almost heroic as I held the reins atop the chariot. Was that how I looked now? The godling shook their head as they chuckled, putting down their phone as they looked at me in the eyes.
“Kid, even for a god like Ares who likes conflict, you don’t do something like that in a temple. You can’t just attack his kid on his own grounds. Plus, it's part of the rules of war to respect neutralized zones. Trust me, you’re home free.”
“Oh. Um, thank you.”
He nodded and went back on his phone. I snapped on the reins and the chariot trotted along, even fire-breathing horses had to follow traffic laws apparently. I was on guard, not taking the godling’s words at face value. Mortals in a daze parted around the chariot, a few snapping pictures at me. I freaked out for a split second before I heard the tourists being in awe at what I heard to be a “vintage bomber”. Dumbfounded, I stopped for a brief second. It didn’t even have wings! But, I could see the mist shimmer around me and for a brief moment, see the silhouette of the plane around the chariot. It was an old fighter, a single propellor with flaming horse art on the nose.
“P-40B Warhawk? Alright, guess we’re working with that.”
I frowned a bit, trying to think if I knew that before this, from a school project or if it was more demigod shenanigans. I was never into fighter jets, but when you’re a demigod sometimes your parent’s godly influence shoves itself into your head and it’s always confusing when it does.
I drove the “plane” to the end of the pier, where I could see my dad sitting down on a barricade, blocking off a massive plane above him. It wasn’t used for war apparently, because I had no clue what type of plane it was. Looked cool though, it was really narrow around the nose end and the wings were all near the back end. He had a big wicked-looking combat knife in his hand that he used to clean his nails. He looked up at me, disinterestedly, before going back down to the knife.
“You’re alive.”
I couldn’t tell from his tone if that was a good or bad thing. It seemed… neutral. Like he was stating the sky was blue. But, overall I’d take that as a good thing, considering our last meeting. I spoke a bit warily, not sure if he was in a good or bad mood considering my victory.
“Uh, so Father. I’m finished with what you-”
“No. You’re not.”
“I’m not!? Do I need to do anything or-”
A moment of panic snuck up into my chest. For a brief moment I was afraid he was going to pull a twelve labors on me, but then he whistled and held out his hand.
“Not until you give me the keys kid, then it’s done.”
I hopped out of the chariot, the reins in my hand turning into keys as the horses went back into their motorcycle form. I somewhat clumsily tossed it to my dad, who grabbed it. He pushed himself off his perch, first making sure his motorcycle was unharmed. Then, he turned to me, eying me up and down as he circled around where I stood. I stood still, at attention as I felt my heart racing in my chest. I felt like a deer, cornered by a wolf just waiting to strike. Yet, the first pang of anxiety soon settled down. If he wanted to take care of me, he would have done so already. Or sent something more dangerous like a Drakon at me when I was driving. I felt my heart leap up into my throat as he clapped a big hand on my shoulder. The gesture wasn’t hostile, if anything, the motion seemed friendly. But his grip was anything but. His hand, like the claws of a tiger dug into my shoulder as he grinned at me.
“I have to say, I thought you were a lost cause, but look at you kid. Took you long enough, but I guess you have enough of me in you after all. Well, a late bloomer is better than being completely useless, but man! You were one of my most pathetic kids when you took that oath. I don’t think I had a kid as wimpy as you in a long time. Well, I’m glad my little nudge helped you keep that oath up after all. It would have been a waste of a perfectly good warrior if you didn’t shape up.”
I looked at him, dumbfounded. He helped me? He didn’t do anything! I wasn’t stupid enough to point it out, but I guess he knew what I was thinking as I felt his grip tighten as he growled.
“Come on, don’t give me that look, kid. Oh, don’t look so surprised. Tip of advice: don’t dip your toes into cards. You have a horrible poker face. Your mom was the same way. But, yes. I helped. Not that kids these days would understand. Parents these days are too soft, including most of us gods. Back in Sparta, we’d leave our kids to fend for themselves. Just give them barely enough food and let them hunt or steal the rest. If they end up dying in the hunt or starved, well that’s fine. They were too weak to do anything of note anyway. You should consider yourself lucky I was generous enough to just turn my back on you.”
He chuckled low, and my blood ran cold as he shook me. I shook my head, fighting off a wave of dizziness as he threatened to take off my arm.
“Oh, but that’s in the past! You passed your agōgē period, all by yourself. Now that is true strength.”
His evil grin widened as he gave me the closest thing to an approved look he’d ever given me. I furrowed my brow as I shook my head. This credit, it wasn’t mine to take, was it? Before I could think, I spoke what was on my mind.
“I’m sorry, but I didn’t do this by myself. Everywhere I went, I had someone to help me out. If it wasn’t for the help from my friends, I don’t think I would be standing here. I didn’t-”
My dad’s good mood instantly soured as his grin warped into a snarl. His grip, although somewhat friendly now seemed dangerously tight as he frustratingly interrupted me.
“Oh for the love of! I’m complimenting you, kid. Look. I don’t care about those other twerps one way or another. Allies are fine enough in war, as long as you don’t make them do all the work. Kid, you’ve gotten strong all on your own, like a true son of mine. Don’t deny you and me the kleos you rightfully deserve ever again. Shut up and just take the honor.”
“I…uh…yes, Dad.”
I was surprised that all it accounted to was a mild scolding. My dad, too seemed to calm down after I agreed with his words, as he went back to a smile. He put his hand back into his pocket as he started to walk up to his chariot. He ran his finger across the chrome finish, taking out a cloth and cleaning off my fingerprints from the metal.
“About your joyride. Not bad, not bad at all. It took you a bit to embrace your birthright, but you ended up not even scratching my ride. Nice. Nice. Saves me the trouble of buffing it out. Now, if you could only stop complaining at everything that opposed you. You’re a man, aren’t you David? Start acting like it. If you think a bag of bones and a pig are hard, just wait until your future. The stronger a warrior gets, the stronger their foes get. Make sure you’re strong enough to stand up against them before you end up a stain on the pavement.”
I heard the engine rev as he got into the seat. He threw a bag at me that I clumsily fumbled with before I fully caught it. I opened it, and a few golden drachmas shined back at me.
“Since your agōgē finished up, consider yourself un-cut off. Even I’m not heartless enough to leave a son of mine stranded in New York. Keep the rest. Feel free to hang around my temple, and help yourself to the gift shop if you want, it’s on the house, happy birthday and all that. Just don’t go overboard.”
He turned the motorcycle, wheeling it around so he could leave the pier. He turned around, giving me a few more parting words he shouted over the roar of the engine.
“Don’t think you’re done yet, David. You got a lot more to grow. Especially now that you can receive my blessings again. What, did you think that taking a good hit was all you can do? You’ll see sooner or later. See ya kid! Don’t disappoint me.”
He revved his engine one more time and took off, leaving me behind on the pier. As I watched my dad leave, I realized that with that resolved, the last of what made my Styx Oath so suffocating was finally finished. A part of me felt that I’d always keep the consequences of it with me. Either dad would continue to disown me, or I’d be horribly injured from my jobs. But, to my surprise, everything worked out alright. I worked as hard as I could, and now everything was over, truly over. I…wasn’t sure how I felt about it. I mean, like obviously I didn’t wanna have them with me for the rest of my life. But, for all of my oath’s lifespan I had the deadline looming overhead, and my expectation was that something would happen to me as a result. I was glad to have it over with, but I never felt that I could relax until now. The feeling of not having the anxiety of my imminent demise was something I wasn’t familiar with, and to be honest I still have trouble relaxing. As he disappeared into the afternoon traffic, I realized that, so too did my previous life.
Maybe…maybe I could afford to enjoy my life now after all.
Big thank you to Tiffany's writer, angelspoint for helping me with her parts, I had a blast working with them! Hope you enjoyed David's Victory lap!
2024.05.18 10:03 Hubbungus Scary how easy it became
TW: (No numbers, just of me reminiscing feeling thin and sick)
((This is purely me word vomitting hehe pun))
I suffered from BED my entire life. It wasn't until recently when I developed extremely unhealthy restrictive behaviors.
I'm sure I would have ended up in urgent care for some heart or bowel problem if I went another few months, but then the holidays came and I binged more than I ever have my entire life.
It was insane how much my body fought back the time I heavily restricted.. In just a few months I gained nearly all I had lost
The food noise had never been this intense growing up, it's so agonizing and infuriating how much control I lost in the past few months
And now?? I've started the b/p pattern. I hate throwing up. So much so that whenever I tried in the past (even involuntarily!) I was never successful.
It's now all of a sudden easy??? Now it's a routine???? I hate it!! But it strangely feels right again. I'm getting better each time even while my brain keeps nagging me to stop letting this happen.
But I want to be skinny again, I loved my flat stomach, the way my arms were small, even for a guy. My stomach concaving in when I lay down and I'd feel my ribs and collarbone over and over My legs never looked so thin and actually proportionate! My ass cheeks never looked so cute and not saggy before. My collarbones popped out so well underneath my necklaces. My face looked so.. normal sized
I even loved feeling unwell. I feel so sick saying it, but I enjoyed the bad effects of heavy restriction only because I reached the body I've always dreamed about, and it was worth it.
The little chubby kid I was would have been discouraged of the lengths I took, but I still would have been jealous cause being thin mattered more to me. That's what everyone told me growing up.
And my monkey brain still thinks that.
Anyway, I plan on recovering properly, I'm just admitting defeat and letting this disease take over. I will do my best go stop b/p and go back to restriction. Then, once I get close to my gw I'll do my best to either maintain/recover.
submitted by Hubbungus to EDAnonymous [link] [comments]
((This is purely me word vomitting hehe pun))
I suffered from BED my entire life. It wasn't until recently when I developed extremely unhealthy restrictive behaviors.
I'm sure I would have ended up in urgent care for some heart or bowel problem if I went another few months, but then the holidays came and I binged more than I ever have my entire life.
It was insane how much my body fought back the time I heavily restricted.. In just a few months I gained nearly all I had lost
The food noise had never been this intense growing up, it's so agonizing and infuriating how much control I lost in the past few months
And now?? I've started the b/p pattern. I hate throwing up. So much so that whenever I tried in the past (even involuntarily!) I was never successful.
It's now all of a sudden easy??? Now it's a routine???? I hate it!! But it strangely feels right again. I'm getting better each time even while my brain keeps nagging me to stop letting this happen.
But I want to be skinny again, I loved my flat stomach, the way my arms were small, even for a guy. My stomach concaving in when I lay down and I'd feel my ribs and collarbone over and over My legs never looked so thin and actually proportionate! My ass cheeks never looked so cute and not saggy before. My collarbones popped out so well underneath my necklaces. My face looked so.. normal sized
I even loved feeling unwell. I feel so sick saying it, but I enjoyed the bad effects of heavy restriction only because I reached the body I've always dreamed about, and it was worth it.
The little chubby kid I was would have been discouraged of the lengths I took, but I still would have been jealous cause being thin mattered more to me. That's what everyone told me growing up.
And my monkey brain still thinks that.
Anyway, I plan on recovering properly, I'm just admitting defeat and letting this disease take over. I will do my best go stop b/p and go back to restriction. Then, once I get close to my gw I'll do my best to either maintain/recover.