Stirring awake, Morte slumbered peacefully next to me. Our evening had been busy the moment I woke up from that damn spell, a golden envelope fluttering into my palm. So much for the monster jobs lately, the shrill shriek of my cell phone had me picking it up before it woke up Morte. Roseworth’s voice had me groaning bitterly to myself, my free hand opened up the envelope. An unfamiliar name glittered up at me, Roseworth saying the same name. Cursing under my breath, no files existed with her name.
“Cool. Do you have any information on her?” I whispered into the phone, Morte still slumbering away. Checking the time on my phone, a terse shit escaped my lips. Why did it have to be four o’ clock in the morning! Giving me coordinates, her kind words did little to wake me up. Scratching at my rat nest of hair, a groggy yawn poured from my lips.
“Let’s do this one together. I want it to be the two of us if you don’t mind.” She requested honestly, something seeming off. Hanging up the phone, my bare feet hit the floor. Washing up real quick, nothing eased the swelling dread in my gut. Drying off, my steady hands twisted my hair into a bun. Selecting a steel gray Lolita dress, little relief came to me the moment I slid my feet into my boots. Checking to see if everything was there, I strapped on the case holding my dagger upon the discovery of everything being present. Sneaking past the bed, my fingers snatched my purse on the way out. Avoiding the creaking floor boards, my favorite hearse waited for me. Climbing into the driver’s seat, my fingers typed in the coordinates. Allowing the maps to boot up, the engine roaring to life had me ready to go on my adventure. Driving in pensive silence to the next spot, the trees became the city. The city became more trees, another wave of dread making me sit in the hearse for a good fifteen minutes. Stepping out, a strange fog hung over the sea of endless roots. Locking the door, a few of the trees glitched. Seleste must be a goddess of deception, a lump forming in my throat. The real Roseworth must be captured somewhere around here, the number on the phone matching hers. Kicking my dagger into my eager palm, lord knew what craziness was wandering in that trap. Pausing in front of the thin wall of the trap, my hand slid through. Crossing into the trap, the other side vanished from my sight. Tears welled up in my eyes at a chilling voice, Mr. Bone standing in front of me. Tilting his head back and forth, a cruel grin lingered on his lips. Catching his head in his palm, inky blood painted his gray hair. Quivering in my spot, my hand cupped my mouth. Swinging his head back and forth, shock rounded my eyes the moment a fuchsia dagger slid through my stomach. Sinking to my knees, everything blurred. Cupping my stomach, ocean blue eyes tripled. Hitting the dirt, a rough darkness stole me away.
Stirring awake, chains had me tied to Roseworth’s back. Struggling in my chains, the links clanging woke her up. Fresh cuts and bruises covered her face, my own hands feeling the hole in my stomach. Coughing up a large clot of blood, her kind eyes darkened to an emotion of fear and considerable worry. Sliding off my boot, a strong push had it by her hand.
“Can you pluck out my collection of medicine?” I whispered for only her to hear, her left eye winking once. Shifting through the beat up leather, her steady fingers rolled the one vial in my direction. Flicking it into the air with my finger, my teeth caught the round end. Biting down, glass shattered. Gulping down the milky liquid, the shards tumbling from my tongue. Sliding my boot back over, the worn leather of my boot hugging my feet felt like Heaven. Mouthing the words key, her head nodded towards a hole in the tree. Winking two times, my message for her was received. Rising to our feet, the dirt crunched as we maneuvered ourselves closer to the hole in the tree. Sending a couple of my shadow snakes to retrieve the keys, the bark glitched with every hiss. A couple of snakes dragged my dagger over to me, the keys jingling into my palm. Kicking my dagger into my free palm, Roseworth swiped the keys from my other hand. Flipping through the keys,the right one had the chains clattering to our feet. Melting the keys in her palm, surprise rounded my eyes at my healed stomach. Burying me in a desperate embrace, our phones were nowhere to be seen. Letting her emotions soak my shoulder, my mind working on how to get our asses out of here. Wiping away her tears as she stepped back, something had to draw her here in the first place.
“What drew you here? I had you little stunt double call me. Not to mention, the gods need me to kill her.” I interrogated patiently, checking her over for wounds. “No offense, I can’t make the connection to why you had to come here.” Dusting off her soiled suit, her hands felt around her pocket. Plucking out a black envelope, my fingers curling around the edges precariously. Opening the flap, my name shimmered in the false moonlight. Closing it back up, her shaking hand tucked it back into her pocket.
“When it was at one of our last crime scenes I had to bring it to you. Thankfully, the time and place was on this card.” She explained with a tired smile, pulling her pistol from her pocket. “I don’t know what you are into but you seem to be sniffing too close to the sun. Yet, the will to bring you to a stop is nonexistent.” Smiling quietly to myself, her respect for me was hardly earned.
“This is something that I have to do. What did she look like?” I inquired with a softer tone than before, her hand scratching the back of her neck. Summoning a piece of paper and pencil, the tip moved on its own. Lowering itself in front of me, the goddess almost had a foot on me. The sleek fuchsia bob matched her damn dagger, her cold ocean blue eyes staring back at me. Yanking Roseworth behind the largest tree, scarlet painting my cheeks the moment I covered her with my scent. Seleste came into view, her wool navy dress swaying with each step. Spinning fuchsia daggers in her eager palms, a shrill shriek rang out in the still air.
“Where the hell did you go, you fucking brats!” She bellowed into the rumbling sky, raindrops splashing onto her cheeks. “Goddamn it! The twins told me that it would be easy! There is nothing easy about this!” Stomping her feet in some sort of pathetic fit, my brow cocked at her childish nature.
“Get in the trees and shoot from above. This is going to get messy.” I ordered discreetly into her ear, her protests failing to leave her lips the moment I skidded out of our hiding spot. Moving my wet strands out of my eyes, my dagger extended to its full form. Running the blade along the trees, sparks danced in the air. Whistling one of my childhood songs, the notes seemed to come from every corner of her trap.
“Perhaps the brat is you. Adults don’t throw fits, after all!” I called out, attempting to throw off her composure. A rush of cold air lashed at my cheeks, Seleste appearing over my head. Blocking her daggers with my blade, one push sending her back into the sky. Summoning my shadows, the forms glitched into carbon copies of me. Coming back down, the show was set to begin. Hiding in the trees, my shadows kept her entertained while I prepared a spell to take over her trap. Getting on my knees, a swift slice had inky blood pooling in my palm. Dipping the tip of my finger into shining liquid, the tip of my finger dancing around to produce a ring of demonic symbols. Pressing my palms together, the cost would be half of my magic.
“Powers of the bones of the underworld.” I chanted boldly, loose strands of my hair floating up. “Take what belongs to me!” Laying my palm on the biggest symbol, the circle glowing to life. The forest decayed to a sea of dead trees, the dirt darkening to a deep scarlet. Flicking the wet dirt off of my palm, I made sure to mark random trees in an effort to confuse her further. Catching my breath, her insults grew louder. Preparing myself for a rough blow, an ice bullet prevented her from getting close enough to harm me. Shifting her attention to Roseworth, her gun glinted in the rising moon. Winking in my direction, the next move was mine. Blasting the area around her feet, ice climbed up her leg. Struggling in her spot, another bullet struck her chest. Ice began to devour her body, an idea coming to mind. Moving my lips a mile a minute, the ground rumbled. My giant snake burst from the ground, the fangs piercing her heart. Foaming at the mouth, her body jerked around. Ice shattered with a whip of his tail, her limp body flying into her mouth. Slithering into his hole, the ground slammed shut. Collapsing to my knees, a couple of organs burst from the impact of two spells. Coughing up blood, the trap dissolved into the normal woods. A loud shit burst from my lips at the damn twins towering over me, both of them staring down at me hungrily in their usual outfits. Licking their lips, lightning crackled up and down their arms. Horror rounded my eyes, my muscles seeming too weak to move. Silent tears stained my cheeks, Morte and Croak appearing over their heads. Spinning on their heels, sparks danced aimlessly around me with every violent clash. Shrinking my blade back down to its dagger form, the trees blurring into dozens of trees. Slapping my cheeks, aid would be necessary in a few minutes. Fishing around my boots, a pair of arms tossed me over a pair of feminine shoulders. Sprinting away from the scene, Roseworth’s words seemed to fade in and out, the dirt spinning underneath her boots, a couple more shouts following us. Ripping open the back of a hearse, the frame squealed in protest the moment she leapt into the back. Locking it behind her, her arms held me tight. Glancing up at her, the warm feeling of blood pouring from my lips had me getting nauseated beyond reason. Hitting my face desperately to wake up, her hands ripped the medical kit off the wall.
“Tell me how to heal you.” She pleaded with tears in her voice, a buzzed panic thickening in her tone as I rolled out of her arms. Staring into the box, the engine roaring to life had me bouncing around. Peeling onto the road, Morte and Croak glanced back at me, Croak climbing into the back. Asking Roseworth to hold me still, her slender fingers flipped through the potions. Yanking me back onto her lap, Croak had her head buried into the box. Morte begged for her to help me out.
“I am trying but she broke her magical limit!” She snapped back at him, jolts of pain had me biting my tongue repeatedly, ten vials rolling around in her palms. Mixing them into an empty beaker, the colors blended to form a lovely lilac potion. Opening up my mouth, the sweet tasting potion coated my throat on the way down. Making sure I swallowed it, tears splashed onto my face.
“Stop pushing yourself, love.” She comforted me, her finger tucking my sweat soaked hair behind my ear. “Why did you push yourself so h-” Thuds banged over our head, lightning cracking over the sides of the hearse. Struggling to sit up, my organs were weaving themselves back together. Gritting my teeth, my fingers curled around my dagger. Ignoring the protests, a finger to my lips had everyone calming down. Yanking Croak close to my face, she swallowed the lump in her throat.
“Make Madame Bone appear in front of us.” I hissed with a huff, her head nodding. Crawling up to the window, Morte wiped the sweat off of my brow. “Madame Bone is going to appear in front of us. Drive accordingly.” Climbing up the front seat, wonder brightened my eyes at a gray skinned version of Madame Bone holding her head. Maggots squirmed in the meat of her neck, nausea wracking my body for a second time. The lightning died down, the window groaning down. Pulling myself out, hot air lashed at my cheeks. Wincing as I crept behind them, my dagger spun in my hand. Unable to transform it to the full length, my wits would be my friend. Terror contorted their features, my fingers curling around their collars. Stomping twice on the roof, the brakes squealing to halt had them flying off the roof. Hitting the roof, bones crunching poisoned the air as the brakes hissed off. Reversing the hearse, another wave of crunching had silent tears staining my cheeks. Crawling back towards the front, another gruff groan poured from my lips as I lowered myself back into the passenger’s seat. Bones clicked to place behind us, lightning crackling to life.
“Flood the road.” I spoke simply, his hand hanging out the window. Water flowed freely from his palm, the cold waves hitting their feet. Electricity met water, smoke curling off of their skin. Bringing his hand in, the engine roared with the increase of speed. Peeling onto pavement, lightning flashed in the distance. Curling into a ball onto his lap, his fingers played with my hair. Shutting the window between the back and us, his loving gaze had me smiling tiredly to myself.
“Not that it is any of my opinion but is there a reason you took off today on your own?” He growled through gritted teeth, the steering wheel crying out with his strengthening grip. “I thought you were dead and I can’t live without you damn it!” The others looked up at the plastic dividing us, pure annoyance glittering in my eyes. His tears plopping onto my cheeks stole away any rage I had. Instead of shouting back like I tended to in our fights, his point was valid.
“I am sorry.” I wept softly, everything hitting me. “I am so sorry! You must hate me for being such an asshole.” Shaking his head, he clutched me close to his chest. Kissing the top of my head, nothing needed to be said. Blurred images doubled, a rough slumber stole me away.
Stirring awake, the walls of my bedroom greeted me. Swinging my feet over the edge of bed, a simple onyx summer dress floated over my body. Leaning on the wall, the muscles in my legs screamed out in protest. Making my way along the wall, the warmth of my shadowy powers felt like a sweet hug. Limping down the stairs gingerly, Croak rushed over to me. Draping her arm over my shoulder, her presence felt like Heaven. Friends and family were sure nice to have around, her steady hands sitting me down on the worn leather couch. Staring around the room, the faded wallpaper was a new thing for me. Realizing that the living room walls have never seen my presence, hands cupping my face had me zipping back into reality. Croak’s minty breath bathed my face, her stern expression scaring me.
“What the hell were you thinking!” She berated me venomously, my ears pinning back. “You could have died! We are here to help you.” Hel stomped in, the demon brothers nipping at her heels. Waiting for more chastisement, a movie flew my way. Catching it, a fit of laughter burst from my lips. Parting my lips to speak several times, Hel held her hand up in the air.
“Tonight is movie night and that is that!” She huffed with her hands on her hips, my children bouncing up to me. The brothers grunted gruffly in agreement, the whole crew taking a seat. The bell rang, Wut coming in with a pile of pizzas in his palm. Cal and Morte came in with plates and a case of some sort of soda. Moving over for Morte, cheers erupted around me the moment Wut placed the pizza boxes on the floor. Putting in the movie for us, a rare moment of serenity bathed the space in its breathtaking warmth. Passing the slices around, the mouths were moving on the screen. No words were planting themselves in my mind, Morte leaning closer to me distracting me further.
“How are you holding up, Corspy?” He whispered while adjusting the girls on his lap, a tender blush rising to my cheeks. “Did you learn something on the last mission?” Pressing my lips into a thin line, something did stick out. Why would she work with someone who has water powers primarily? The one good thing that could come from that were a few traps but nothing else came of it. Another thing that haunted me was how many of those new goddesses existed. Thinking back on the details today, Roseworth skipped in with a pile of folders. Shifting Miles around, Roseworth pulling up a chair behind me. Lights painted her face, her breath bathing my neck the moment she craned forward.
“We gathered that the twins have seven new goddesses. Well, six now.” She explained calmly in my ear, Morte cocking his brow in our direction. “I am not on the up and up about how one creates a new religious system. Gods can’t exist without support, right?” Grimacing for a minute, part of that was true.
“In all technicality, one supporter is all you need. That is why her little religion works. As long as they worship those gods the system can exist.” I answered with an exhausted grin, my hand cupping hers. “Are these files on them?” Shooting me a steady thumbs up, a quiet thank you escaped my lips. Asking for a slice of pizza, gratefulness glittered in her eyes. Mouthing thank you, her eyes shifted to the screen. Mr. Bone would have cherished this moment, a long sigh drawing from my lips. Scratching at my cheek, Miles lowered my hand. Draping his arms around my neck, the boy buried his face into my shoulder. Rubbing his back, snores echoed in my ear. Hugging him tighter, tears of tainted bliss cascaded from my eyes. How long had it been since a child this small needed me this much? Basking in the warmth until the credits, protests bounced off the walls the moment I rose to my feet. Putting my free hand in the air, an odd silence came over the room.
“How about we do this once a week? Croak picks the movie next week and we will figure it out from there. I have to get this little guy to bed. Come on, girls.” Leaping over the couch, the sound of footsteps behind me reminded me of the good days. Climbing the stairs to their bedrooms, the girls began their night time routine. A broken smile lingered on my lips at them tugging on sweet pink nightgowns, the girls hopping into bed. Hugging the rabbits, life lit up in their eyes at the sound of my old time song. Tucking Miles in, my lips brushed against his forehead. Walking to the other side of the room, the girls giggled the moment my lips grazed their foreheads. Wishing them a good night, a soft stop had me staying by their sides.
“I love you!” They shouted together, time stopping. Fighting the tears, the girls wondering if something was wrong had me hugging them with a flurry of feverish kisses. Giggles twinkled in the air, Morte coming in. Wishing them goodnight, his hand took mine. Dragging me out, the light clicked off. Placing me on his back, curiosity peaked in my eyes. Stepping into the pale moonlight, a cool breeze had my loose hair floating up. Sliding off of his back, his hand spun me around to face him. Yanking me closer to his hips, his hand cupped my cheek. Tracing his skin along my supple skin, his fangs extended over his lips. Grazing my neck, a shiver shot up my spine. A pop signaled his fangs sinking into my skin, the gulps causing scarlet to paint my cheeks. Letting him drink his fill, this had been his way of keeping his composure. Releasing his bite with a satisfied gasp, my blood glistened on his lip. Licking it off, an apologetic smile haunted his features.
“We could barely take down one demon and now we have to take down two. How the fuck are we going to do that?” He complained bitterly, sliding his hand down to my waist. “We should win with you leading the charge.” Cocking my brow with a sarcastic right, my self-doubt was strong enough to drag me into its tumultuous waves. Hoping that he was right, the flames of hope had died down for the first time in a long while.

THIS STORY TAKES A BDSM-INCESTY STORY AND TURNS IT TRANS! Dale hated his stepmom and caught her cheating. He blackmailed her into becoming his sex slave. The problem is—she grew to love it and now he's fallen in love with her. What will happen when Dad returns and learns what's happened between his son and his new wife??????
It was a perfect Friday morning as Mom and I lay together on the master bed. I had planned continue her overt slavery until Dad returned from his extended business trip tomorrow, but I had essentially released her from it only a few days after my old school chums and I had taken turns degrading her all night long.
The thing was, she seemed to love whatever nasty things we made her do, so it was no longer as hot as it had been. That night climaxed with the three of us pissing on her in the bathtub while she dildoed herself for us, and she had a massive orgasm.
More than that, I had fallen in love with my stepmother as much as she seemed to have fallen in love with me. Ever since then, she had gladly fucked whenever I wanted, did whatever I wanted, dressed as sexy as I wanted, and in general treated me like a Master or a king.
She’d become addicted to presenting herself as sexy as possible, both to turn me on but also because it turned her on. Every night she climbed into bed wearing a scandalous three-piece lingerie set: a garter belt with seamed stockings, a shelf bra that nestled but fully exposed most of her tits and her usually-hard nipples, and crotchless panties so I had instant access to her pussy and asshole.
My dick and my mouth spent much time down there.
Mom had just finished sucking off my morning erection and eating my jizz, which she shared with me. Ever since I freed her, she often made it part of the blowjob. I had to admit my own cum tasted sexy.
“You know, I had this whole list of degrading things I was going to do you before I changed my mind,” I said offhandedly after a kiss.
Her interest perked up. “Like what? We could still try them!”
“Well, that first night with Jake and Ted, when we peed all over you and then we made you suck the last drops of piss out of our dicks? I had been thinking of making you drink the whole thing. Use you like…”
“Like a urinal, Master?”
“You don’t have to call me that. I told you. Anyway, yeah.”
“And I told you, I like the way it sounds. You are the master of my heart, my darling Dale.” She bent down and kissed my cock before she looked me in the eyes. “Anyway… I’d like to try that with you.”
“You’re the most exciting woman in the world to me.” I heaved a sigh. “I only wish Dad would never come home.”
“At least we got an extra month!”
Dad had called a few days after that first orgy to say he was very sorry but his job demanded an extra month out of the country. Helen and I had celebrated with a long fuck in the backyard hot tub.
I bit my lip. “Maybe we should tell him we’re in love and it’s all my fault. And… I don’t know. Help me make up a story.”
She looked at me sadly, warily. “The story is going to be worse than you think. I missed my period last week. I bought a test kit last night and I used it just before you woke. I was going to tell you after we got up, but maybe now is the time. I'm pregnant with your baby, Dale. I hope you’re not angry.”
The emotions hit me like a football pile-up, everything from I’m too young to how deeply I loved my stepmom and how close it would bring us together. In the end that was what won out. I’d do anything—
“What the hell is this!” My father’s voice thundered in the room.
What happened next was a blur, but I remember Mom crying out in terror, Dad yelling, him pulling a gun out from the closet, a struggle, a loud bang, and a sharp pain on the side of my head just before I blacked out. My last thought was fear for my beloved Helen.
I came to sometime later. Helen was in fevered activity, stuffing three big suitcases on the bed. One was loaded with jewelry, cash from the floor safe, Dad’s guns, the others with designer dresses, shoes and handbags worth hundreds of thousands.
“He-Helen,” I gasped.
She stopped packing and came over to hug me fiercely. “Thank God you’re okay, my love,” she wept.
We clung together for long minutes until I asked what happened.
“I will tell you in a minute, baby. But right now I need to know something.” She went over a laptop PC on the dresser that I recognized as Dad’s. “I need your social security number.”
“What? Why, Mom?”
“Please! Just tell me!”
As she typed it in, she explained that I’d fought to take away his gun during the struggle and it had gone off. It killed him. She was transferring as much money as she could into a Mexican bank account near a city where she had relatives. It was the only way we could be free, she said. Or we could risk a murder trial here.
“But it was an accident!”
She hammered in some final keyboard strokes and exhaled in relief. She turned to me with dismay. “We’ve been fucking behind his back for almost two months. I’m carrying your child! If we wipe your prints off the gun it only looks worse. And when your friends tell in open court what you made me do, no jury will believe a thing you say.”
I suddenly felt like I might puke. “Oh… fuck!”
“Get anything you must have. Don’t worry about clothes, I’ll take care of that later. We have all the money we need for a new life.”
In a daze, I grabbed a few keepsakes, some cool boots I liked and a dozen books I wanted to have. We stashed it all in her Jaguar’s trunk and hit the I-5 for the Mexican border. She said not to worry: she’d help me learn all the Spanish I’d need and she’d make sure I’d have everything I wanted after we got there.
We were about an hour out of Tijuana and it was dark when she pulled over to a store for snacks and something to drink. She handed me an open bottle of icy, Mexican-brand Coke. Ten minutes after I drank it, I could no longer keep my eyes open. I passed out.
The nightmare seemed to go on forever—the worst kind where you feel like you’re almost awake but you can’t wake up—bizarre dreams mixed flashes of reality. It was accompanied by pains all over my body, especially my face and a tightness across my chest. At times I sensed that someone was feeding me with a spoon.
I woke with a start in a bright, cheery bedroom with strange bird songs out the window and the smell of Mexican cooking nearby. I tried to sit up and found I was handcuffed to the frame of a hospital bed.
“What the fuck!” I spouted.
Helen appeared a minute later, grinning over me. “Welcome to your new life, Dalia. This will be so much fun!”
“Where am I? Why do I feel so strange and achy? And what the fuck is this this?” I tugged the handcuff.
“It’s so much easier to show you.” She called toward the door. “Mom, I need a hand in here.”
A beautiful Mexican woman, a total MILF somewhere north of forty-years-old, glided into the room. It was then that I noticed they both wore white silk tunics that barely reached past their shapely asses and through which bra-less tits poked hard nipples.
As Helen reached down to my chest, I saw a wide elastic bandage cinched down where I felt a tight, heavy sensation. A hiss of Velcro exposed two very large, round breasts. As I looked at them and gasped, the two women held up and tilted a full length mirror.
I’m a girl with a dick!
Save my pubes and from my eyebrows on up, all the hair had been removed from my body. I had stripper-sized breasts and a slender waistline. My face was utterly smooth, as though no beard was below the skin. It was shaped differently that it was before—it was a girl’s face!
I screamed and passed out. When I came to, Helen explained I’d been kept sedated for the past three weeks while various doctors and specialists had visited here and I’d been taken to a nearby private clinic with an operating room.
“You’ve been getting electrolysis every day to remove your beard and body hair, waxing for your legs and arms. Obviously, you’ve had breast implants. The same surgeon did sort of a tummy tuck and removed the bottom floating ribs to give you an hourglass figure. A cosmetic surgeon made your nose and forehead much more womanly. Plus a filler to give you those fuckable lips! And of course the hair extensions until yours grows out.”
“Why would you do this to me?”
“You’re wanted for murder back in Los Angeles, darling. Not to mention you transferred ten million of your father’s money to a bank in the Cayman Islands. They’ll never find you now that you look like this!”
“You said you were transferring the money to Mexico!”
“I lied. I lied about being pregnant too.”
I gasped again. “You fucking—witch! Why?”
Her smirk was replaced by icy calm. “I can’t slap you until your face heals, but I have a long memory and other punishments.” Then she turned cheery again. “I did it to make you easier to manipulate. I also lied about when your father was coming home. I wanted him to catch us because I knew he’d go for the gun.”
“You planned his murder!”
“And I transferred your fingerprints to that gun that we left behind. If you even try to go to the authorities then will see only a tranny slut who’s the prime suspect in a highly sexual patricide case.”
“Why did you go through all of this? And turn me into this?”
“Tradition. My mama and I have a long history of selecting weak males, beguiling and making them love us. Then we force-transition to give us pliable sex slaves we can use to make more money.” She indicated the Latina MILF. “Dalia, meet Dolores Reina. Dalia’s your new name, by the way.”
She gave Dolores a deep, tongue-heavy kiss as she caressed her ass through the white silk. Helen caught me gaping and broke the kiss. She winked at me. “She’s my stepmom. A real hottie, isn’t she? She did to my dad what I did to yours.”
She cinched my new breasts back down with the binder, explaining it had to stay on until they fully healed. Now that I was conscious I could take over the exercise to keep them from turning painfully hard.
"Your face and tits are too sensitive to play with right now, but I can appropriately break you into slavery, anyway.”
“If you think I’m going to do a fucking thing you—OW!”
I cried out as she seized my balls and squeezed them. As I recovered from the pain she strapped a collar around my neck. It looked much like a dog collar and it had a rectangular plastic box that lay on the back of my neck underneath my hair extensions.
She held up a remote control and pushed the button briefly, making me scream from the electric shock on my neck. It was then a simple matter for them to guide me to their basement dungeon and lock my head and wrists into old-fashioned stocks that bent me over. Ankle cuffs on the floor spread my legs wide apart.
Helen held up a dildo ten inches long and two inches wide. “Here’s where I turn you into a real girl, Dalia.” She stripped off her tunic, exposing her stunning body. Her stepmom handed her a dildo harness.
“Please don’t, Mom!” I cried. The tears stung my lip-filler injection sites. “You don’t need to do this!”
Her smile turned wicked. “Of course I do, baby. It’s payback for what you did to me. Besides, I know that very soon you will come to beg for it, and not just for this toy. Real cock!”
I stared straight ahead in despair, waiting for them to take my anal cherry. That’s when I saw the wall in front of me and the one to my side was mirrored. I was shocked to see just how much mine was now the body of a sexy girl. I’d already been slender with shapely legs, but the big breasts and my new waistline—and my face—made me a sexpot.
I can’t believe my cock is tingling from this!
Dolores was now also naked and so intensely beautiful, looking like an even hotter version of 1960s sex symbol Raquel Welch, with bigger tits and ass. She smiled kindly she stepped up holding a bottle of sex lubricant and coating her finger.
“I specialize in mariconas. What you gringos call ‘sissies.’ I just love turning boys into slutty girls, Dalia.” She softly kissed my lips. “If you relax and give into this, it won’t hurt at all, baby.”
I couldn’t help moaning as she massaged my asshole with a slick digit, especially as she eased her forefinger all the way inside my now-horny butt. My cock got instantly hard. Within a few minutes she’d worked three fingers up into my rectal muscle. It gave me a boner as hard as I ever got and made me whimper like a sex-starved slut.
“Make your voice higher, sexy Dalia,” the Mexican MILF coaxed. “You are now a beautiful, sexy girl. You should sound like one!”
She purposefully grazed and jabbed my prostate, building a deep ache in my groin. My voice got higher as my P-gasm built, and I felt the precum flow down my straining cock shaft. Then it hit like a huge wave. I cried out like a girl in ecstasy.
“Your daughter is ready for you, mija,” the MILF said.
I actually wiggled my butt in anticipation as I felt Mom’s hands cup my ass. I couldn’t help doing it and I wondered why in hell this turned me on so much. Did I have this buried in me? Sure, I sometimes jacked off to shemale porn but always to a fantasy of fucking them. Never—
“Mami will make you a full girl now, Dalia. Try to push it out and it will go right in,” she said and then kissed me.
She was right: the huge dildo slipped right into me. It stung at first and I wanted to beg her to pull it out. Instead, I tried to relax and I breathed into it. Helen fucked me slowly and gently at first, letting me get used to it. I could tell she wanted me to like it, to like being a slut with a dick. She wanted me to like erasing every trace of normal American boy in me.
“Oh, I love that, Mom!” I whined in my new girl voice.
“Call me Mami,” she husked, picking up the speed of her thrusts. “You will learn Spanish quickly for your new life here, mija. That means ‘daughter’ in the informal.”
“Es hora de freír su cerebro,” Dolores chuckled.
Mom laughed. “She said it’s time to fry your brain.”
I wondered what she meant until the exquisite MILF’s lips closed around my leaking cock. Mom battered into me while her mom took me in her throat, sucking me into an explosive orgasm that made me briefly sag in the stocks from erotic exhaustion.
There was a sudden, heavy scent of ass as Mom pulled out of me and put the slippery, fouled dildo in my face. She looked down into my eyes, wondering if she’d have to order me. She didn’t need to. I was her slave now. I gladly opened wide and took it into my mouth.
“Muy bien, mija. Te amo.”
“Very good, daughter,” I purred between licks. “I love you.”
“Muy bien, my sexy girl.”
She pulled the cock away and gave me a deep, penetrating kiss. Her love for me was no act. It both heartened and worried me. I truly had no idea who she was or what she was capable of.
You know damn well what she’s capable of. She’s a Black Widow who killed your father, framed you for it, stole all of his money, and turned you into her own shemale sex slave. She could decide to kill you and nobody would ever know.
Yet still my cock stayed rock hard.
“Now we shall see how much you love me, Dalia. Hold her waist, Mami. It’s time to own her fully.”
I could barely breathe from the excitement when she pulled out the huge jar of Vaseline and began coating her right forearm. I had no idea what my ultimate fate was, but I hoped that as long as I went along with whatever perversion she came up with that she’d keep loving me.
What surprised me was how much I looked forward to pleasing her and surrendering to her every whim. It reminded me of those few times I’d gone skydiving and turned my fate over to the universe.
I cried out with joy as her fist slid deep into my rectal meat. My cock throbbed with pleasure and my heart filled with giddiness from the feeling to total abandon, especially as she fondly caressed my girlish ass with her free hand. I heard them whisper and giggle in Spanish, and I hoped they were planning something nasty.
My wish came true a moment later when Dolores dragged over a low table and climbed atop it. She spread her legs and shoved her spread labia in my face. She ordered me to drink.
As her hot piss filled my mouth and I gulped it down in heady exhalation, I reveled in a freedom I would never have known otherwise. I was now a shemale sex slave, a chick with a dick, owned by two sexy, evil women in a rich villa somewhere deep in Mexico, and I had no idea what would happen to me next.
And I didn’t care!
The above story is one I posted in a BDSM erotica sub and it had no sissy/trans elements until this chapter. Here's the next part:
https://www.reddit.com/transgenderfantasy/comments/1clxtmq/my_loving_mother_climax_forced_transbdsmincest/
If you'd like to read parts 1 and 2 of this story, here is part 1:
https://www.reddit.com/BDSMerotica/comments/1cbt0xmy_loving_mother_dubconm20f32incestanaldegradation/

On Friday, there was a scantily-trafficked post that immediately caught my eye.
“Why do many experienced players wait for their turn pre-flop to look at their cards?” - Post by Standard_Emu6202

Is it to pick up live tells of other players? By that logic wouldn’t waiting for your turn and the tables focus to be on you give others live tells on you? Is it so they don’t get emotionally attached to the hand until they know entry price?
Just curious what edge I’m giving up by looking right away.

This was the undisputed top comment by Tolve.

By that logic wouldn’t waiting for your turn and the tables focus to be on you give others live tells on you?

Not really. It's NOT a tell like "that glean in his eyes means he has aces." The real (and very useful) preflop tells are does someone look disinterested, maybe with cards already half in the muck and spacing out, or interested in the pot paying close attention to the action. Basically you may give away whether or not you intend to play the hand to observant OOP opponents. If you don't look at your cards until the action is on you, then they don't need a tell to let them you're playing the hand, your bet speaks loudly enough.
You might ask, "Why can't I just look at my cards ahead of time, and not give off tells?" Well you can try, but it's kinda tough. Pay attention to it and count how many times you totally space out preflop while waiting to fold a hand you know you're gonna fold. You might also ask, "why do I care if I'm planning to fold anyway?" The answer is because if they can tell when your about to fold and they don't see that, it means they know (or at least have reason to suspect) you have a hand worth playing so might fold something at the bottom of their range they would have opened otherwise.
That said, I still look at ahead of time most of time unless there are some tough players to my right. Cause I'm lazy and want to space out.

^{Also, I’m not trying to attack Tolve, he’s summarizing the point I’ve also seen made countless times, and by ignoring it to be lazy, he’s unironically the hero in these situations.}
I am making a standalone submission because this is important: I hate when other players do this, and you should too. Especially if you’re a winning player, you should stop doing it, and you should really hate it when you see other players do it. Also, if you’re a winning player, yeah, I’m not lying: You can increase your profits by 6% instantly by ceasing to do this.
Yes, I’m serious. Yes, this was a lot of effort to prove this point. Yes, that is how annoying I find this innocuous-seeming “exploit.” Allow me to explain.
So here’s, in a nutshell, the pitch for the “exploit”:
If you let everybody else look at their cards, and wait to look at your’s, you can gather information on the person(s) on your direct left. If they give off a reliable tell that they are going to fold, you are essentially “stealing” their position, and can therefore profitably open a hand you would otherwise fold. There’s also a sub-pitch, which was actually expanded upon more than the usual core pitch in the top comment that I highlighted, which is that you don’t give off tells as to your action, namely when you’re looking disinterested and folding, but that really doesn’t even have the notion of a benefit inherently, which I’ll get to later.
Simple, right? The “exploit” turns certain folds into a profitable opening hand, makes money you would’ve otherwise left on the table.
Alright, let’s just start here: Hands per hour matters so much in live poker. It’s why people chop their blinds, speeding the game up helps everybody, including the two people forgoing their chance to play a potentially profitable hand from the blinds. Profit is the rate of play times your edge. Your edge you control through study and game selection. As for rate… You can really only do so much, but it’s arguably as, if not more, important than your edge (making the loaded assumption you have a decent-sized one).
I'm a winning player, which is important to this post. If you’re a losing player, you want less hands per hour, at least as it pertains to your hourly profit (loss) rate, you’ll bleed out slower. Winning players want to not only win the most BBs per 100 hands, but also get the most hands dealt as possible each hour. Both will increase a winning player’s hourly/total profit.
So,
If I'm doing this trying to grind out an extra, what, 1 BBs per 100 hands raising K9o in the Cutting because I see the button is going to fold (effectively netting me 0.05 BBs, since instead of mixing K9o for 0.00 BBs in the cutoff, I'm effectively playing it from the button where K9o has an EV of 0.05), I'm doing a few things:

I'd be seeing less hands per hour. Like, a lot less

My original premise has always been this:
For reference, I win 15-20 BBs an hour in the main game I play in. So, assuming there’s 30 hands an hour, increasing my BB per 100 in this game is 50 to 67 per 100 hands (online players are crying and throwing up). That means that I need to weigh the opportunity cost of my actions. If I increase my BB by 1 per 100, but it means that I see one less hand per hour, I've actually lowered my hourly rate from 15-20 BBs an hour to 14.79 to 19.63 BBs an Hour, a loss of 1.4-1.8%.
But, if only this “exploit” was only costing the table one less hand seen per hour.
Originally, I had written a paragraph about the potential for the pace of play to be slowed If you had four try-hards doing this is a table at the same time, and I assumed that four people all waiting to for the action to be on them before making their decision would slow the pace of play by 10%.
Then, I figured, hey, what the hell, I worked in NBA analytics as a consultant for over 50 players over the span of nearly a decade, let’s just run the math, it’s simple enough:
There’s 60 times 60 (3,600) seconds in an hour, and if the average casino table averages 30 hands an hour (I’ve seen a range from 25 to 35 cited, let’s just split those down the middle), that means there is, on average, 120 seconds her hand. Let’s assume that this “exploit” takes anywhere from 5 to 10 (I’ve experienced players doing both, and even some Silent Generation members taking up to 15 seconds per hand), and simplify that down to an average of 7.5 seconds that means that one for each player doing it makes each hand take ~6% longer than usual AND OH MY FUCKING GOD WHAT THAT CAN’T BE RIGHT!!!
But it is.
An easy way to check my math is just taking ( (120 + 7.5) / 120) - 1, which equals 0.0625, or 6.25%. Remember, that’s per person, because if two try-hards are doing this at the same table, Randy #2 will always wait for Randy #1 to be done halting the action to check their cards before he will begin to check his own. For a 30 hands an hour table, that means that each person is costing the entire table 1.88 hands per hour when they choose to do this, and, to point this out again, they stack.
Yeah. For those of you who haven't extrapolated how toxic this is to a win rate, here’s a chart. Remember, getting X% less hands in is literally identical to lowering your live win rate by X%:
​

Number of Try-Hards	Slow Down Percentage	Hands Lost Per Hour
1	6.25%	1.88
2	12.5%	3.75
3	18.75%	5.62
4	25%	7.50

​
Assuming the maximum favorable conditions, this is what the same chart looks like:
​
35 hands an hour, 5 seconds wasted per wait-to-peek:

Number of Try-Hards	Slow Down Percentage	Hands Lost Per Hour
1	4.86%	1.70
2	9.72%	3.40
3	14.58%	5.10
4	19.44%	6.80

​
And, assuming the maximum least favorable conditions, this is what the same chart looks like:
​
25 hands an hour, 10 seconds wasted per wait-to-peek:

Number of Try-Hards	Slow Down Percentage	Hands Lost Per Hour
1	6.94%	1.74
2	13.89%	3.47
3	20.83%	5.21
4	27.78%	6.94

​
Real fast and without the charters, here are the other two extreme scenarios:
Fastest Game, Slowest Peeks (Most Annoying): 9.72% Slow Down Percentage, 3.40 Hands Lost Per Hour per Try-Hard
Slowest Game, Fastest Peeks (Least Annoying): 3.47% Slow Down Percentage, 0.87 Hands Lost Per Hour per Try-Hard
I think that this information speaks for itself: By having somebody perform this “exploit” at your table, the effect is basically making winning player’s 6% worse at poker. This is true even if that player performing the “exploit” is yourself. You attempt to claw back some of that 6% by playing more hands, but, good luck being able to make that up (more on this later).

I’d be opening the door for an instance of flukish disaster (getting three-bet from somebody I was banking on folding)

In theory, if I knew 100% of the time that my read was infallible, this wouldn't be worth considering. But, we’re humans, we make mistakes, and everybody’s habits are subject to the deviations of chance.
Walk through this scenario with me:
If I'm opening K9o from the button, the chance that I get 3B from the SB or BB is baked into the EV of 0.05 BBs for the hand. You know what's not baked into the EV of 0.05 opening K9o from the button? Getting 3 Bet from the button. This can happen if you're opening it from the cutoff with the live read that the button is folding, but (whoops!) it was a false negative read, the button actually hadn't looked at his cards yet because he was dicking around on his phone or something, and three-bets you. You have to fold, and in trying to steal 0.05 BBs of EV but opening a hand that you would otherwise fold in the cutoff, you have lost the entirety of your standard opening size. GTOWizards says you should be making it 2.3 BBs from the cutoff in NL50, so, according to that proportion of EV to the BB open, this means that you just lost the equivalent of 46 successful K9o cutoff opens to this one outlier event, and therefore you need to be 98.87% sure that the button will fold every time you open K9o from the cutoff for the move to be profitable. I wouldn’t put a dollar into a soda machine if I was only 98.87% confident that the machine wouldn’t eat it.

Is this really a good use of my attention/energy?

Okay, let’s start here: I know this is hella ironic from the author of a 4,500 word post on /Poker trying to get people to stop doing something that almost nobody else has ever complained about. Let’s all be adults about this, now.
Anyways.
Every person in a poker room has a finite bandwidth of information that they’re able to prioritize, observe, process, and utilize. I’m not about to go full-Danile Negranu, “everything you do at the poker table conveys information,” so yeah, I bet you would like a sandwich, you fat whale-pig hybrid. The point that I’m getting at here is when you are watching the NFL Network on mute in April, you are missing that the dude actually check-jammed Q9s on A J64r flop, and not the flush draw T turn. When you are texting on your phone, you are not noticing that the guy who 3bet bluffs preflop uses a bigger denomination chip when he’s raising for value, and a bunch of smaller denomination chips when it’s as a bluff. I’m not here to say that you can’t do both, either. Shit, order a sandwich when you’re hungry, nobody plays their best when they are trying to push away their stomach growling.
But, here is what I will say: If I had my choice of anything pertaining to tells and game strategy that thinking opponents will spend their time, energy, and bandwidth on, I hope it’s something as trivial and opaque as guessing whether or not the other players in the game will be folding their hands preflop and devising intricate strategies to exploit that.
Please, spend an hour trying to figure out whether you can safely raise T6s from the hijack because the cutoff and button might be giving off a tell. That’s turning a 0 EV fold from the hijack into the equivalent of a 0.01 EV button open, baby!
Not to mention, the people who do this only end up drawing attention to themselves, and they are inadvertently telling the table what type of player they are. Whenever I see this, I instantly understand that the person is absolutely a try-hard, but somebody who either can’t see the forest for the trees, or somebody whose win rate is so low that they would rather make ~1 big blind per 100 hands more than they would like to play at a faster rate. Knowing that most people act in their best interest at the poker table, it’s clear that a person doing that is not a big winner, as they would understand that they make more playing fast than they do grinding out marginal opening hands. As you can see, this is like a Bat Symbol in the sky for, well, a shit reg for knowing players, and an experienced player for the whales. Not the type of marketing you want for yourself.
This actually pairs nicely with my next point…

It shows a fundamental misunderstanding as to why the button is more profitable than the cutoff

I have often heard people say that the button is the most profitable position in poker because it’s the one where they get to raise the highest percentage of their hands in position.
This is a little true, but you’re not grinding out a higher EV raising the hands that you would otherwise fold from the cutoff.
We can prove this one of two ways.
The easy way is to note on GTOWizard that the EV of being dealt any two cards and having it fold around to you in the cutoff is worth 0.15 BBs, and in the button that rises to 0.23 BBs. That’s cool.
But, that breaks both ways. It means that in the cutoff, hands that are worth at least 0.151 BBs of EV are raising that position’s average, while hands worth 0.149 BBs are lowering that average. Ditto for 0.231 and 0.229 BBs of EV for the button. So, when we look at a hand, like, say Q7s, it’s technically profitable from the cutoff (0.01 EV) and the button (0.06) EV. In fact, it’s the last hand that is profitable to raise from the cutoff when rounding to the hundredths decimal place, as GTOWizard does, so this is a great measuring post that I will return to. While raising Q7s from the cutoff will not generate much profit, I’m not going to go galaxy brain on calculating at which BBs per 100 threshold you should be valuing the opportunity cost of quickly folding the Q7s to get slightly more hands in and therefore raising your hourly rate more than harvesting that 0.01 EV by raising it from the cutoff. So, it stands that while raising Q7s is making you money, it actually isn’t accounting for much, because turning a 0.01 EV open into a 0.07 EV open that accounts for 4 out of the 1,326 possible combinations of hole card combos means that 0.3017% of all hands dealt I make 0.06 more big blinds.
This means that every time I’m dealt two cards on the button, the chance that it’s Q7s is adding (0.3017% * 0.06) EV before I know what my cards are compared to if I was being dealt two random cards in the cutoff. That equation comes out to 0.00018102 BBs of EV, or 1/441.94th the distance between the 0.15 and 0.23 BBs of EV difference between the positions.
That’s the easy way, because you can extrapolate that all the hands like Q7s are going to have a similar statistical endpoint and therefore aren’t going to be doing much to bridge that cap.
The hard way is to find all the combos that are not opened from the cutoff and are opened from the button and assess the number of combos and EV of each of those hands.
Here they are:

Hand	Combos	EV Per Combo	Total EV
Q6s	4	0.06	0.24
K9o	12	0.05	0.6
T7s	4	0.05	0.2
K2s	4	0.05	0.2
Q5s	4	0.05	0.2
97s	4	0.05	0.2
87s	4	0.05	0.2
J7s	4	0.05	0.2
Q9o	12	0.04	0.48
A5o	12	0.05	0.6
A7o	12	0.04	0.48
T9o	12	0.04	0.48
J9o	12	0.04	0.48
Q4s	4	0.03	0.12
33	6	0.03	0.18
A6o	12	0.02	0.24
76s	4	0.02	0.08
86s	4	0.02	0.08
A4o	12	0.02	0.24
J6s	4	0.02	0.08
Q3s	4	0.01	0.04
T6s	4	0.01	0.04
J5s	4	0.01	0.04
96s	4	0.01	0.04
65s	4	0.01	0.04
GRAND TOTAL	166	0.0332 (Average)	5.78

This is it. This is the Library of Alexandria for all the people who wait to look at their cards. I have revealed the sacred knowledge.
Also, for the record, this is me taking a bit of a shortcut and being nice to the people who practice this “exploit.” To generate this list of combos, I found the aforementioned last profitable open from the cutoff (Q7s), found out how much EV this open generated from the button, and just went down the list on GTOWizard of every button open that makes less EV than Q7s. The problem with this trick is that I actually captured some hands that are opened from the cutoff. Q6s, Q5s, 97s, J7s are all, according to GTOWizard, mandatory opens from the cutoff, and 87s and A5o are mixed between raising and folding at greater than 70% for raising. Excluding them (and not K2s, which is mixed at 50.5/49.5 favoring raise), there are 134 combos generating 4.14 total BBs of value.
I hope everybody was sitting down.
If executed without a single flaw, ever, this “exploit” generates 4.14 BBs of total value spread across not just 134 combos that it utilizes, but the total 1,326 possible combos of hands. That’s a BB per 100 hands of, wait for it, 0.31 BBs per 100 hands.
All the time, the energy, and of course, the opportunity cost of time wasted, to generate an extra 0.31 BBs per 100 hands of profit.
I would sooner dig to China using a lacrosse stick than go through all this effort to try to capture 0.31 BBs per 100 hands of profit.
Remember my original pitch? 1 BB per 100 hands more profit at the opportunity 1 less hand an hour?
Here’s the reality: 0.31 BBs per 100 hands more profit at the opportunity cost of, dream case scenario, 0.81 less hands an hour, but realistically I’m kidding myself if I don’t assume it’s around 1.88 hands an hour.
Like most things in life, you get what you pay for. With this really basic, bottom-of-the-barrell, entry-level “skill,” you get almost no tangible benefit.
So, where is the profit coming from by playing more hands in the button versus the cutoff?
Where profit always comes from, super premiums:

Hand	Combos	CO open EV per hand	CO Total EV	BU open EV per hand	BU Total EV	Per Hand EV Margin	Total EV Margin
AA	6	9.31	55.86	9.62	57.72	0.31	1.86
KK	6	6.1	36.6	7.08	42.48	0.98	5.88
QQ	6	3.49	20.94	4.88	29.28	1.39	8.34
AKs	4	2.27	9.08	3.37	13.48	1.1	4.4
AKo	12	1.63	19.56	3.13	37.56	1.5	18
JJ	6	1.61	9.66	2.75	16.5	1.14	6.84
AQs	4	0.86	3.44	1.85	7.4	0.99	3.96
TT	6	0.61	3.66	1.55	9.3	0.94	5.64
GRAND TOTAL	50	3.18 (Weighted Average)	158.8	4.27 (Weighted Average)	213.72	1.10 (Weighted Average)	54.92

Why do these hands generate dramatically more EV on the button than the cutoff? A mix of position and, yeah, getting three-bet/called off just a little bit lighter because of all the junk that you open from the button that you don’t from the cutoff.

“But OP, you’re totally missing the point. Whenever I showdown a button open from the cutoff, I show that I’m playing wide, and therefore I will get raised and paid off more when I have super premiums on the cutoff like I do when I’m on the button! How could you not think of that?”

Seriously, did you think I would spend all this time and not anticipate that counter-argument? Let me share some more secrets…

In a per-hand vacuum, I actually don’t really care if people think they’re gathering live tells on whether I’m folding in advance preflop, because I’m folding, and nobody you want to influence is being influenced by your wider opens

This is my card-reading process:
I get dealt both cards. I instantly bend-peek the bottom left corner on both for the rank, then I quickly bring them together to do the classic\ two-card peal-peek to double-check the suits. Yes, I do this when I have a pocket pair of the same color for balance, too, thanks for asking but obviously, I already thought of that. Yes, I do this even when the first card is a two and I’m under the gun, like once in a thousand hands the blocker information helps me when archetyping a player based on post-flop action, so I want to always know my exact cards even when I’m folding. The whole thing takes about 3 to 4 seconds, and that little extra sauce I put on the routine by bending the cards individually wouldn’t even matter towards extending the total length of the hand if everybody immediately looked at their cards the moment they were dealt, also.
Yes, there is the argument that I could skip the bend-peeking and just peel-peek, but I am just confirming the information I already know and, yeah, I like to bend the cards, it makes me feel like I’m playing in the Full Tilt Poker Million Dollar Cash Game, shut up.
After I do this, I watch the action and wait for it to get to me, then I act. I rest my hand on my cards regardless of if I’m raising or folding while I do this.
It’s the same every time. It’s fast, I know instantly how I play this hand because it’s not my first time being dealt this combo and I already know when I start/stop 3Betting this hand from. I don’t lose interest when I get dealt rags in the blind, I stay tethered to the action and I hope for a chop. I view this, frankly, as decorum to the people behind me, and a bit of a societal contract. I wouldn’t fold out of turn in a million-dollar pot because it influences the action, and it costs me nothing to do the same on this much smaller scale, so I do it in hopes that the people behind me will do the same when one day I’m behind them.
But, back to the hand, and the EV implications: When I fold a hand outside of the blinds, I don’t make money, and I don’t lose money. The EV is 0. Therefore, folding 74o on the button is a non-event, like casting a line when fishing and then realizing that you lost the bait. Oh well. Why should I care if a guy to the right of me is opening a hand like J6s because he thinks I’m folding? What am I gonna do, get into a pointless leveling war by three-betting him and hoping that the blinds have dust? I’m gonna fold, like I planned!
So, it follows that if the try-hard in the cutoff has spent considerable time studying me and trying to ascertain which subtle mannerisms mean strong and which mean weak, I don’t care. Poker is a zero-sum game, sure, but my EV is hard-locked at zero for this hand anyway, so I guess that the 0.03 BBs that the cutoff is getting by raising Q4s instead of folding is coming from the blinds. Honestly, I prioritize other things in my life before plugging my own 0.31 BBs per 100 hand live leaks, I’m not going to be losing sleep if my good faith attempt still ends up costing another player 0.31 BBs per 100 when they’re in the blinds, sorry.
This actually leads me to the only potential way to make this “exploit” profitable when considering the opportunity costs associated with it: If you are able to do this only when you’re on the button with the intent of finding times to steal the blinds with any two cards, then perhaps maybe if you’re incredible at reading tells you might be able to overcome the opportunity costs and eke out a profit with this “exploit” after accounting for everything. But, again, how many times do you need to be wrong and wind up with 95o on A765r on the turn before you have dusted away your 1.5-BBs-a-pop stealing profits playing a strange hand in a stranger way because nobody bats 1.000 on any prediction. And, assuming you somehow only wind up in those flukish spots rarely enough that you, in fact, are able to profitably steal the blinds even with the opportunity cost of missing out on more hands, refer to my original point #3, and ask yourself “is this really a good use of my attention/energy?” Also, how many times can you even hope to do this, once every 5 orbits if you’re incredibly skilled and in a dream spot for this?
Also, yeah, sure, this street could theoretically break both ways. Maybe a super, super discerning player might end up folding a marginal hand that is usually an open if they sense that I’m going to three-bet them. Do I put much stock into the idea that this is something that happens outside of self-reported, apocryphal anecdotes? No, obviously not, I’ve seen people raise first in big out of turn pre, then the player who is to act before them raises anyway to just fold when the out of turn player raises big anyway. Correlation does not always equal causation, and everybody in poker has an anecdote to reinforce how clever they think they are.

Conclusions

Let’s return to this hypothetical argument:

“Whenever I showdown a button open from cutoff, I show that I’m playing wide, and therefore I will get raised and paid off more when I have super premiums on the cutoff like I do when I’m on the button!”

Here’s the problem with the whole “exploit” of waiting to look at your cards: At the crux of the argument for using it, you will always find unrealistic dichotomies, missing the forest for the trees, and confirmation biases.
The unrealistic dichotomies are easily apparent once you know to look for them. What player is studied enough to understand that you’re opening wide, but oblivious enough to not realize that you’re doing it because a player behind you isn’t paying attention? A dumb player doesn’t know what hands should be opened from where to begin with, he won’t adjust his raises if he sees you get out of line with A7o from the cutoff. A smart player understands what hands should be opened from where, but he also understands why you’re waiting to look at your cards , and just by following the action he will notice that a player consistently telegraphs his folds. Not hard to understand that they’re opening wide, and revert to playing a cutoff versus BB spot like they would play a button versus BB spot. I do this whenever I need to, it’s an easy adjustment. Also, when I watch somebody wait to look at their cards and then immediately stare down the person to their direct left when they clearly are waiting on pertinent information before raising or folding, it’s not that sneaky and easily exploitable until the villain proves they can adjust with a false tell when they have a super premium.
Also, what types of players give off super consistent tells? Yeah, bad ones. You should be expanding your range before you even know how interested they are in their hand, especially if you’re in the cutoff or button and all the players behind you are bad, because you want to play more hands with bad players to begin with. Hard to miss the forest for the trees more than this, but again, when you’re spending time obsessing over tells, you might not think about this because your attention and energy is going elsewhere. But, what if the fish is hyper-focused and clearly waiting to play the hand behind you on a given hand, should you be expanding your range then?
No! Obviously not, and this is the real punchline of it all: YOU DON’T NEED TO WAIT UNTIL AFTER YOU LOOK AT YOUR CARDS TO NOTICE THIS TYPE OF STUFF TO BEGIN WITH!!! You can look at your cards, begin to follow the action, and then right before it gets to you, glance at the fish who wear their obvious tells and decide if they’re giving off a can’t-miss signal of strength and act accordingly. For all the reasons mentioned above, why do you care if you’re giving off subtle tells on whether you’ll play the hand or not? Not to mention, another unrealistic dichotomy is the idea that a good player would struggle to look at a good hand and not give off a tell. Also, if you can’t look down at AA without giving off a tell, WAITING TO LOOK AT YOUR CARDS WON’T SAVE YOU!!
The entire thing, the logic behind it, the obsession with the procedure of folding hands preflop ignoring the size of the tiniest effect it could possibly have on anybody else’s strategy, and not to mention trading 6% more hands in to make 0.31 more BBs per 100 hands, it’s MADNESS.
So, do everybody at the table (including yourself) a favor:
Increase your profit by 6%, and stop waiting to look at your cards until the action is on you.

Welcome back, fellow mobile gamers, to my weekly breakdown of the most interesting games I played and that were covered on MiniReview this week! :) I hope you'll enjoy some of them.
Support these posts (and YouTube content + development of MiniReview) on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/NimbleThor <3
This episode includes a large indie MMORPG, a high quality platform RPG ported to mobile, a fantastic adventure puzzle game, a great casual party game, and an indie TD.
New to these posts? Check out the first one from 301 weeks ago here.

Let's get to the games:

Afterimage [Game Size: 1.3 GB] ($5.99)

Genre: Platform / RPG - Offline
Orientation: Landscape
Required Attention: Full
tl;dr review by AlexSem:
Afterimage is a great port of a beautiful "Metroidvania" action platformer where we explore a vibrant colorful world, fight all sorts of bizarre enemies, collect loot, and improve our skills to face even harder challenges.
The game takes place in a surreal fantasy world where monsters freely roam, danger awaits around every corner, and a few brave heroes desperately try to fight the mysterious evil wreaking havoc on our lands.
The combat system is quite elaborate, with dual-wielded weapons, special attacks, dodging maneuvers, and magic spells. The game’s six distinct weapons - each with their own skill tree - provide a sufficient level of combat variety.
I wish, however, that there were more special weapon skills, and that they were easier to pull off. Right now, the touch controls - although fully customizable – lack in comparison to playing with an external controller.
For me, the most interesting part was not the fighting, but the exploration. With traversal mechanics that gradually unlock, such as dashing, sliding, and double jumping, the game offers many opportunities to hone and prove our platforming skills.
Each new ability also allows us to reach previously inaccessible locations, which means we have to revisit already explored areas to find new treasures and quests.
The story wasn’t impressive but provided enough incentive to drive the gameplay forward. And even after finishing the main game, we can still participate in separate boss battle challenges, which I think is a nice addition to the main story.
Overall, Afterimage stands firmly among the best Metroidvania games on mobile. I’m sure any fan of platformer RPGs will enjoy it.
Afterimage is a $5.99 premium game with no ads or iAPs.
Check it out on Google Play: Here
Check it out on MiniReview (website version):: Afterimage

Strange Horticulture [Total Game Size: 713 MB] ($5.49)

Genre: Adventure / Puzzle - Offline
Orientation: Landsscape
Required Attention: Full
tl;dr review by AlexSem:
Strange Horticulture is an atmospheric occult puzzle game where we collect and identify various peculiar plants, aid people in need, and try to solve the mysteries of a troubled little town.
After our uncle passed, we inherited his flower shop, his cat, and a large collection of plants that each have a useful effect. Some can treat various physical and mental problems, while others let us open locked doors, establish trust with strangers, or keep ourselves warm in the cold. Some may be used to harm or even kill people.
The main portion of the game has us meet the visitors of our shop, listen to their stories, and provide them with professional help. Using our illustrated book of plants, we must carefully examine the plants we own to find the one matching the description and give it to our customer.
Resolving these encounters awards us with new plants or new pages for our book. The game also occasionally provides clues as to the whereabouts of interesting new plants. To obtain them, we need to find the right place on the map and then travel there, solving any encounters we run into using the very same plants we grow in our shop.
What I liked the most was the game’s captivating story that gradually revealed itself through conversations, events, card divinations, and even plant descriptions.
What I didn't like was the uncomfortable interface for managing and manipulating our collection of plants. The game also features lots of small text and UI elements. While we can freely zoom on any part of the screen, playing on a large device is definitely preferred.
Strange Horticulture is a $5.49 game without ads or iAPs.
As a niche game, it’s not for everyone - but I found its non-stressful meditative gameplay to be perfect for relaxed play.
Check it out on Google Play: Here
Check it out on MiniReview (website version):: Strange Horticulture

Keep Talking & Nobody Explodes [Game Size: 223 MB] ($9.99)

Genre: Board / Casual - Offline
Orientation: Landscape
Required Attention: Full
tl;dr review by CaptainQQ:
Keep Talking & Nobody Explodes is a fast-paced cooperative puzzle game where the goal is to diffuse a bomb with a group of friends before it explodes.
The gameplay is split into two roles. One player is the diffuser, and everyone else is an instructor. So first and foremost, don't buy this game if you have no one to play it with because you need at least one partner to complete the levels.
The diffusers gets to look at a screen which has a briefcase with a bomb inside it. This briefcase is covered with buttons, lights, and wires. Meanwhile, the instructors get a bomb diffusing manual.
At the beginning of the game, each module of the briefcase consists of just a few simple tasks. But by the end, the briefcase is covered in complex symbols and cryptic serial numbers. Each type of task has multiple levels of difficulty and several challenges in each difficulty – to prevent diffusers from just memorizing patterns. In fact, the entire briefcase is randomly generated every time.
While the game started as a VR experience that turned into a PC and console game in 2018, it feels entirely natural to play it with touch controls on a phone or tablet. Likewise, the graphics and puzzles look fantastic.
Keep Talking & Nobody Explodes is a $9.99 premium game. It's great that only one copy is needed to play with an entire group of friends, but it’s still hard to pay for a game that can’t be played without friends.
Overall, Keep Talking & Nobody Explodes is a very fun coop experience, and it’s the perfect game to pull out as an icebreaker or at a party.
Check it out on Google Play: Here
Check it out on MiniReview (website version):: Keep Talking & Nobody Explodes

Crush Link TD [Game Size: 545 MB] ($2.99)

Genre: Tower Defense / Strategy - Offline
Orientation: Landscape
Required Attention: Full
tl;dr review by AlexSem:
Crush Link TD is a colorful tower defense strategy game where we fight against malware, spam, viruses, and other digital threats that try to spoil our upcoming date with the girl of our dreams.
However, this premise mostly serves as a cool setting for what happens in-game, as the gameplay itself is similar to that found in most other tower defense games.
In each level, there are multiple paths for our enemies to take, and we spend money to place gun towers, bot spawners, missile launchers, and other obstacles to prevent them from reaching the exit node.
Killing these threats awards us with money that we then spend to place more towers and repel even harder waves of enemies.
As we progress through the levels, we slowly unlock new towers and upgrades, and encounter new types of enemies. Based on our performance, we also receive a currency used to permanently improve the stats of our towers. And this is exactly where the gameplay becomes grindy, as we need to replay already finished levels to afford all the upgrades.
Crush Link TD is a $1.99 premium game without ads or iAPs.
Despite the game's somewhat cheesy theme, I like how well the gameplay mechanics align with it. And although it looks simplistic, the game actually managed to surprise me with its level of polish. So if you’re looking for a well-made tower defense game without aggressive monetization, give Crush Link a try
Check it out on Google Play: Here
Check it out on MiniReview (website version):: Crush Link TD

Heartwood Online (Game Size: 373 MB] (Free)

Genre: MMORPG / Action / Indie - Online
Orientation: Landscape
Required Attention: Full
tl;dr review by NimbleThor:
Heartwood Online is a cross-platform indie MMORPG with a large focus on PvE, crafting, and resource gathering.
After picking one of four standard fantasy classes, the core gameplay consists of fighting monsters to level up, and collecting resources to increase the levels of our various non-combat skills.
To my big surprise, Heartwood Online is actually an action MMORPG, which means every attack and skill must be aimed correctly at the enemies. I appreciate this, as it creates a slightly more engaging combat system.
Progression is incredibly slow, however, and the game is more grindy than most mobile MMORPGs. This is partly because it takes a long time to unlock new weapons – and partly because we deal very little damage, making each fight take a while.
I enjoy slow games like Old School Runescape, but the grind in Heartwood Online tested my patience. However, once I got to around levels 10-12, things started to speed up, which I appreciate.
Gathering resources and crafting gear quickly became my favorite in-game activity, and I think this part of the game is better-paced than the combat.
The biggest downside is that much of the early game isn’t polished yet. For example, targeting enemies is a bit finicky using the touch controls, and simply tapping the ability buttons fires our attack in a random direction. In addition, some classes have a hard time finishing the game’s first quest without dying.
Heartwood Online monetizes via iAPs for extra bank slots and cosmetics with no pay-to-win advantages. The $4.99 bank slots purchase is almost necessary, but the rest are not.
Despite its flaws, the game has the potential to become a great grindy MMORPG. But it needs more polishing.
Check it out on Google Play: Here
Check it out on MiniReview (website version):: Heartwood Online
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Part 3

Back with the GT9 Rewrite. Part 4 now.
Before Crowley and Hazard unite together in Hazard’s body Hazard implores that they should think about a better way to go about defeating CRC than just brute force as that's a moronic plan.
So Crowley realizes that if the Birthday spell that was used to bring Christian Rosenkreutz into this world was made by Aleister Crowley himself then no doubt the two Crowleys could write an anti-magic spell that negates the Birthday spell used to reanimate CRC.

Why had she brought up Aleister Crowley’s spell here in the first place?
What did it have to do with the mysterious Transcendents of the Bridge Builders Cabal? Seeing how puzzled Kamijou was, Aradia spoke up.
“We chose a method that doesn’t use a pregnant woman.”
“So? You were still messing with the fertilized egg undergoing cleavage in the test tube. >Even in the original Crowley version, the mother remained an ordinary human. Birthing a special child did not remake her into a holy mother who could cause miracles.” The little wicked woman patted her own stomach while laying out her accusations.
And she winked.
“Crowley used the word karma in reference to the current or directionality of the force that binds the soul. And he said that karma could not be judged good or evil – high or low.”
“You mean…?”

The Birthday spell that the Transcendents used to magnetize their savior was created by Aleister Crowley as stated by GT8.

“I don’t know if you’re giving a plausible excuse to hide your true intentions or if you’re trying not to think about it yourself, but you’re afraid of the parents who brought you into this world, aren’t you? The Bridge Builders Cabal used a special method to revive you, so it’s entirely possible they could rearrange the ceremony’s process and symbols to instantly kill you again. You feared having your newfound freedom taken away, so you chose to attack your parents the instant you were reborn. You moved quick so you could catch those Transcendents off guard.”
Magical astral projection existed as a single spell with two processes: one that separated the mind from the body and another that returned the mind to the body. So by rearranging the separation process, one could achieve the return process.
Necromancy and doll-based curses worked much the same. Very little magic only worked in one direction. It was much the same as an explosives technician placing as much emphasis on knowing how to cause explosions as on how to safely prevent them.
In an extreme example, the Anglican Church had created a grimoire library as a countermeasure against any and all magicians.

Crowley and his Hazard will have a conversation about the nature of magical spell’s mechanics and how to rearrange them to cause the opposite of what the Birthday spell did. They'll create a small countermeasure Grimoire to kill CRC.

“…Warning. Reading from chapter twenty-two, verse one. Flame magic technique successfully reverse engineered. Distorted cross image confirmed to be created by runes. Building technique for anti-cross use…Type One, Type Two, Type Three. Twenty seconds until complete activation of Eri Eri Rema Sabaktani.”

-OT1
Index John's Pen Mode creates an anti-magic technique to destroy what she needs to when faced with a distorted spell so Crowley and Hazard merely need to do the same.
They'll engrave the anti-magic grimoire texts on a sword Aleister Crowley will carry into battle. It'll appear similar to the sword he wielded against the Golden Dawn.
Engraving a Grimoire on a weapon will be taken from the principle of the Aztecs. They imprinted their Grimoires on the skin of dead animals rather than pages of books. The pelt of a puma for example.
It's also how Etzali was able to absorb Grimoires into his body. The texts on his very flesh and bones.
If Crowley can slice Rosenkreutz with it 32 times then he’ll be able to undo the Birthday spell and kill him. I picked the number 32 because it's stated that the Bridge Builders Cabal had more than 30 members so each slash would be like one member of the BBC performing the reverse ritual to send him back to the afterlife.

Within the detail of the book the column's vertical axis is numbered from 1 to 32 signifying the 32-paths of wisdom which occur in the western Qabalah, numbers 1–10 are the sephirah of the universe and numbers 11–32 the paths which join them. The horizontal columns have many categories pertinent to religion, mythology and magick given in some 32-parts each.

And of course because of the Hermetic Qabalah from 777 and Other Qabalistic Writings of Aleister Crowley.
We return to the story as CRC leaves the Pet Shop with his new animal friends like a Disney Princess.
Remember earlier when I said I wanted to show off Academy City's technology as being useful and not fodder? Yeah I meant what I said but I'll actually move a scene from the OG GT9 here.

The 8-wheel Predator Octopus and the rest of the military vehicles were designed to be operated remotely as ground drones. After the first defense line was destroyed so badly, no one thought CRC could be repelled with ordinary firepower. Which led to this strategy: triggering the self-destruct only after he had easily broken through the defense line and entered the defense formation.
They probably hadn’t used your average explosive either.
“Ah…gah?”
Kamijou’s retinas were scorched by a flash of light as white as welding.
Most likely, they had made use of a special reaction using aluminum or iron powder. At more than 3000 degrees, the blast could literally melt steel and it had hit the man at point-blank range.
Shirai Kuroko shouted over the boom while lying down on the runway, protecting her head.
“Did they really have to go this far!?”
“Seems that way. The suspect is still standing. He didn’t even duck!!”
The busty glasses Judgment girl must have had Clairvoyance or a similar power because she was directing her wide eyes toward the dust cloud.
“You’re…kidding.”
Mikoto had also frozen stiff. She may have detected something with her radar produced by reflecting weak microwaves off of things.
But Kamijou didn’t have time to see the truth for himself.
He heard a deafening tearing sound.
The XHsACV-15 Anaconda, the snakelike chain of armored vehicles, had started to move. It looked like the three units were going to run over Rosencreutz, but instead they formed the three sides of an equilateral triangle and came to a rapid stop.
First, they trapped him.
That 70m giant surrounded the same area as a schoolyard.
But it was not just a thick wall. The mobility to deploy as the situation demanded was the Anaconda’s greatest strength.
Down on the ground, an Anti-Skill officer shouted into a radio.
“Fire!!”
The guns on the sides of each unit opened fire on the interior of the giant triangle.
Self-destruct drones were launched sharply out and 20mm Gatling guns sprayed bullets. The noise alone was terrifying. The barrage was so dense an ordinary human would have been turned into a bloody mist and splattered across the ground in less than a second.
But only an ordinary human.
And it didn’t end there.
Something fell from heaven to earth like a bolt of lightning. 120mm shells and 20mm Gatling guns were combined to create a manmade divine punishment of lead and powder.
Kamijou had seen this before.
A large transport plane had been converted into a mobile aerial gun platform called a gunship.
It flew in a large circle overhead, raining down a massive number of bullets.
An Anti-Skill officer shouted while crawling slowly along the ground.
“So the HsAC-03 Spotlight got here. 200m around the target point is a fragment warning zone! Fall back! Everyone fall back!”
“A 200m radius? That’s bigger than your average school or stadium. Which means it covers all of us here!” protested the honey blonde girl.
Several explosions erupted in quick succession. The Anaconda’s wall was meaningless if the metal fragments and pieces of asphalt flew up in the air and poured down on their heads.
This might as well have been a volcanic eruption on the surface.
Even with the martial law, they couldn’t have carried out a bombing this large in the more urban part of the city. This all-out firepower was only possible here in District 23 with its vast expanse of runways and not a school or dorm to be found.
Or so it seemed just before a cylinder of ultra-heavy tungsten alloy dropped straight down from outside the atmosphere. It was 10m long and 80cm in diameter. It had been launched from Academy City’s giant satellite.
The heavy metal pillar just barely missed the gunship circling overhead, nearly stalling out the 50m craft with the mass of air it brought with it, and dropped straight toward Christian Rosencreutz.
Sound was compressed.
Even light was trapped, unable to escape, before everything burst outward from a single point. An artificial comet had struck. If the blast had been unmanaged and free to spread, it might have obliterated District 23 itself. Instead, the special grooves and angular points on the pillar’s side and the angle of its tip gathered the kinetic energy together, sending it piercing straight down into the ground. It easily dug up the experimental nuclear shelter spread out below the asphalt runway.
“!?”
While the vectors were concentrated to an extent, it wasn’t perfect.
The force that did escape was enough to twist and flip the 70m Anaconda all-terrain armored combat vehicle. Kamijou was nearly crushed by it, but it could easily have been worse.
Without that wall there, the thick shockwave would have hit him directly and converted him into a clump of meat.
After gathering scrap metal into a giant shield, Mikoto muttered in a somewhat dazed way.
“Could they have dropped that on my head any time they wanted…?”
Rolling on the ground, Kamijou didn’t even have time for questions like that.

Kamijou, Anti-Skill and MisaMisa would actually encounter Christian Rosenkreutz instead of Rubedo and they'd do the same thing they did to Albedo with the inclusion of the Giant Satellite artificial comet.
Idea here is to set the scene of just how indestructible CRC is compared to his minions the Four Stages that can be harmed by conventional weaponry. The difference this and the original novel is that the weapons were never truly helpful but here they managed to take care of Nigredo, Albedo and Citrinitas with it so they were useful.
I feel like the idea of having such powerful weapons fail makes sense on paper as we never had Magic Side villains directly tank Science Side weapons like you'd expect. If you shot Stiyl Magnus he’d be dead, if you dropped ultra-heavy tungsten alloy at Acqua of The Back he’d be dead, if you berated Thor with a sky full of gunfire from an aircraft he’d be dead.
Sure a few other Magic Side characters can survive this too but CRC is actually the first character to say “I'm an occult God, your human made weapons are nothing to me!” I'm actually surprised we have such few instances in the series of Magicians fighting against weapons. Even Acqua VS Powered Suits is off because Acqua never tanked their gunfire, he dodged it and then bodied them.
Yes CRC is teleporting any attacks to another dimension in order to protect himself so he doesn't actually have Superman skin but you get what I mean. In some respects this is actually pretty smart of Kamachi even if you can include a fix like having the weapons work on his minions.

“This old man is the one who slumbers in the heart of the holy ground guarded by the seven walls. If you truly wish to tear down these walls, you must dedicate 120 years of tireless effort to the task.”
“I don’t think so.”
“Heh heh. So you aren’t naïve enough to be deceived by mere words?”
“You claim to only need yourself, but you worked with your seven disciples to build the House of the Holy Spirit and you were placed in that special grave. So in the end, you were a magician who had to pay attention to symbols and colors with their origins in the land.”
Aleister didn’t hesitate to explain this.
Because it wasn’t worth hiding.
“So all I had to do was transport you to another world. You don’t have the land’s support anymore, CRC. You might as well be trying to use your phone’s GPS map on Mars. The rules change outside of the world you’re used to.”

Turns out CRC's perfect defense wasn't a defense at all and he merely transported any and all attacks to a separate phase that contains his coffin. The House of The Holy Spirit.
The Seven Walls thing is misdirection to mislead Kingsford as the Roar flame didn't even connect to CRC.

Anna Kingsford switched to water from her index finger and invisible ether from her thumb, but it was all wrenched off course before it could reach the silver young man and thrown into an entirely unrelated space.

Okay sorry for getting sidetracked again.

When all of Anti-Skill’s attacks and Academy City’s Giant Satellite 📡 fail, then Aleister Crowley, in his old body, wielding a sword with Grimoire texts engraved on it in his right hand, the Blasting Rod in his left hand, and having Platinum Wings from becoming Aiwass’ Avatar, and The Great Demon Coronzon with her Golden Wings, appear and walk up to Christian Rosenkreutz in front of Kamijou Touma, Anti-Skill, and MisaMisa.
Notably, as Anti-Skill opened fire on CRC they'd kill all the animals he had with him. Excusing it as a casualty over the radio before firing as though animal life means less than human life.
“YOU MISERABLE WORTHLESS HUMANS DESERVE TO SUFFER AND DIE FOR KILLING INNOCENT ANIMAAAAAALS!!!!!!”, he would say genuinely crying.
CRC loves animals and the planet so this would actually make him truly angry and blood thirsty and he would've murdered everyone there if not for Coronzon and Aleister Crowley appearing.
They would confront CRC in a duel.
Like in the original novel Aleister Crowley would spirit CRC away. They'd disappear from the streets that Kamijou and the gang were at like a magician vanishing act.
Then they would fight inside the shifted phase.
This battle would be more bombastic and chaotic than the original as you have Crowley with his old techniques and Coronzon using all her powers we saw in Coronzon arc like Magick, Secret Calls, magical symbols with her long hair (even though Crowley cut it off she should be able to regrow it if she has control over her body again), pitch black flames and possession over objects.
Coronzon & Aleister Crowley would compete with each other to see who can kill CRC first as per their contract. If Coronzon can kill him first then she regains her freedom, if Crowley can kill him first then he'll go back to Coronzon’s vessel but Crowley thinks he might lose because of his Curse of Failure but if his failure means Coronzon’s success then his teacher is avenged.
I won't write a detailed fight since this isn't a fanfiction — real fanfics take too much effort. It's just a good exercise for me while I'm not studying or working.

“I am the fool who attempted to suppress the creation of sparks by creating a new mythology as cushioning between the many phases. Unfortunately, it didn’t work because the Christian church wanted to protect their monopoly on the concept of god and sent their billions of followers against me. But since the theory itself was sound, I can at least spirit someone away.”
The stage had been set.
Aleister and Rosencreutz both took a step forward.
Space was compressed and light was distorted.
Christian Rosencreutz held an old lamp made of glass. It contained a collection of energy said to be an inextinguishable light. Releasing only the smallest amount from the glass case transformed the gentle glow into a crimson serpent consuming all the oxygen in the air.
Aleister responded with two simple words.
“Great demon.”
“Kee hee hee! Ee hee hee hee hee, hee ha ha ha ha ha hah hah hah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!”
The red was twisted and bent.
It crashed into an invisible wall in front of Coronzon.
The human did not bat an eye.
The initial clue had come from Kingsford. He knew how to control it.
“Do not rely on your past legends, CRC. Your true colors are showing.”
Rosencreutz sighed and tossed the eternal lamp over his shoulder like a child with a toy he had lost interest in.
Batlike wings flapped behind Lola Stuart’s back and a deadly gale blew through the world.
It swept through every nook and cranny and everything it touched grew black and rotten.
The wind itself was colorless. The floor, walls, and ceiling gradually blackened, peeled away, and pursued Rosencreutz.
At some point, a flask of powder had appeared in CRC’s hand. No, it wasn’t clear if it truly was there. His mimicry of holding it may have been so perfect it created the illusion. Either way, the silver young man popped off the lid with his thumb and scattered the red powder. The legendary Rosicrucian cabal had not been pursuing anything as trivial as eternal life.
“Revolution.”
The world at large really did change. The black color vanished. The air grew clean and full of negative ions, like deep in the forest. Control of this world repeatedly changed hands, like a tennis rally.
It was a casual thing.
A simple thing.
If this were in the outside world, the entire city would have rotted apart and then been buried in verdant trees.

But moments in the fight that I think would be cool are Coronzon and Crowley fighting Christian together and then Crowley yells “Coronzon catch!” and Coronzon grabs Crowley’s Blasting Rod and possesses it like she possessed parchment paper that one time to imbue it with her essence.
CRC would make another defense for himself now that he realized he can be harmed with his visually broken and bleeding nail: He'd set up an invisible diamond wall that nothing can get past similar to St. Germain now that his connection to the House of Holy Ground spell doesn't get good reception in this Phase.
But the issue with this shield is that CRC needs to anticipate how strong the attack is. He’d already check Crowley’s history with his Miniature Garden and know that the Blasting Rod multiplies all attacks by 10x so he’d be able to adjust his expectations according to that fact: Create a diamond wall that can tank 10x more of the damage than CRC is expecting as he knows it'll be multiplied.
Normally the attack would be multiplied by 100x because of CRC's expectations but CRC has a very strong mind so he can organize it well enough in his head to avoid that.
But with Coronzon throwing the attack the power of the Blasting Rod will hold a powerful value of damage and essentially throw her Magick: Flamming Sword at CRC. The Blasting Rod can be weakened if the opponent magician knows the trick. Simply imagine that the attack that's being thrown at you has the value of a paper ball that school kids throw at each other even if that's multiplied by 10 it won't be able to harm you because 10 paper balls are still paper balls.
But by Coronzon wielding it she’s giving that Spiritual Item a fixed amount of power and a ton of it. That power gets multiplied by 10 regardless of what CRC was thinking.
Though technically Blasting Rod does this to all magic spells the user throws so it's technically nothing but in the hands of Coronzon it's exceedingly powerful.
Shattering his diamond wall and giving Crowley the opening to slash him 3 times. As Crowley’s body is working as Aiwass’ avatar, he receives a massive speed amp, allowing him to speed blitz CRC (while he was caught off guard and he wiped out his Flask of Powder to attack Crowley when he was going for the 23rd slash). All their powers would rise in their battle. Crowley would throw his sword at Rosenkreutz, but not his anti-magic sword; rather, an invisible sword that only exists in CRC's mind with the numbers 1, 27, 5. He'd use his Spiritual Tripping on Rosenkreutz to activate the Claymore, which CRC would catch and bleed from slightly as it uses his own imagination to hurt him.
“You didn't really think only the Blasting Rod had Spiritual Tripping, you bastard!?” Then he’d make his hand into the symbol of a flintlock gun with the numbers 32, 30, 10 and shoot him right through his diamond shield.
Aiwass would act as a sort of jammer when CRC uses his Miniature Garden card to view Crowley’s past. The same way that he was unable to look into Touma's history because of Imagine Breaker so he only saw bits and pieces about Spiritual Tripping and not the full picture.
Explanation for that is that Aiwass was able to save Lilith long ago which means Aiwass has a slight fate negation as Lilith was fated to die but Aiwass was still able to save her on Sprengel's orders.
Crowley’s Spiritual Tripping only targets the opponent, not anything else so the bullet and subsequent attacks would pass right through anything else as the diamond wall is still diamonds even if it's rooted in the occult.
Coronzon, Aleister Crowley & Christian Rosenkreutz would have a prolonged fight until Aleister Crowley finally gains what he wanted in the battle: 10¹⁰ Big Bang Bomb.
To achieve a power of 10^10, you would need to multiply the original power by 10, ten times.
So, if you have a spell that multiplies the power by 10, using it ten times in succession would result in a power of 10^10.
Mathematically, it would look like this:
Original power * 10 * 10 * 10 * 10 * 10 * 10 * 10 * 10 * 10 * 10 = 10¹⁰ but Crowley would reach a short cut and cut this in half with Twisted Silver Wand and Blasting Rod so he'd only need to attack 5 times to get this.
So Aleister Crowley's constant barrage at CRC would eventually yield to the degree that his Spiritual Tripping reached 10^10.
Then the numbers 28, 4, 29 would fly from his fingers using the Twisted Silver Wand that mimics the Blasting Rod. He would then perform the Big Bang Bomb Spiritual Tripping spell and have that multiplied by 10, making it 10¹⁰ times the power.
10^{10=10,000,000,000}
10¹⁰ is basically ten 10s being multipied into eachother with what's essentially two Blasting Rods Aleister Crowley can reach such a reality shattering effect.
He’d hit him with 10,000,000,000 times the Big Bang, like 10,000,000,000 universes being created right in Christian Rosenkreutz’ face. His Holy Spirit House still works it's just far weaker because he isn't in the normal Phase currently so that's why he's not instantly dying.
With Christian Rosenkreutz weakened but not defeated he'd be able to kill him by just landing 29 slashes of his sword and reverse the Birthday ritual the Transcendents did.
He’d go in for the kill but-
“The Secret and Unrecorded Call *********” Coronzon would strike him down with a light of rainbow.
If Crowley manages to kill CRC with those 29 slices of his anti-birthday grimoire sword then that means he wins and she loses. Their contract is that Coronzon must be the one to kill CRC for her to receive her freedom.
So she betrays Crowley and aims for the killing blow herself.

“Every number is the same. My right hand contains Nuit of Resurrection. Watch as the possibilities expand and surpass the bounds of the finite. My left hand contains Hadit of Vengeance. The smallest point gathers and concentrates all forces to create a single meaning. Thus, an attack shall be released from the infinite acceleration of the Circle of Ra-Hoor-Khuit and shall appear on the surface layer of this world.”

And…

“Hm.”
Christian Rosencreutz nodded. He honestly accepted his opponent’s claim.
But he didn’t stop there.
“But removing some of my functions does nothing at all to boost your strength, does it?”
Something exploded.
Rosencreutz had not moved a step. He only held his palm out. That was enough for something to go wrong inside Aleister’s chest.
A rusty flavor rose up his throat, he couldn’t stop himself from coughing up red, and the female feet below the beige habit lifted from the floor.
It happened too fast for human senses and even for great demon and Holy Guardian Angel senses to follow. Aleister bounced several times down the hospital waiting room, knocking over the sofas and making a racket of destructive noises.
CRC looked at the back of his hand and his nail.
“Do you know what I did to you?”
This was not a cheap trick.
The very foundation was different.
Christian Rosencreutz blew boredly on his fingertip.
“Masters of the Rose never use a spell or magic circle as is. They extract whatever form of the mystical they require from the symbols hidden in the scene around them. The Rod of Asclepius, the cross, the Hippocratic Oath – hospitals are a treasure trove of miraculous symbols and elements.”
“I doubt…that’s what you really did.”
‘Heh heh. Because true experts do not talk at length? Why should I follow the rules set forth by that dead girl – Kingsford?”

CRC would do what he did to Crowley to Coronzon here and they would now be in the hospital as they were in the original work. They moved several miles from the streets of AC so when they manifested into the regular world again they wouldn't be where they originally started fighting because the area they were in in accordance to how much they moved around would've taken them elsewhere and that was coincidentally a hospital.
Coronzon killed Crowley here and Coronzon herself was now wounded by CRC and CRC was in the hospital now. CRC took the Grimoire sword and broke it to pieces with his bare hands.
Of course that meant that Crowley’s soul went back to Coronzon’s vessel as the contract failed.
In terms of an ideological battle Christian Rosenkreutz & Aleister Crowley would argue about legacy and creating an entire religion from the ground up and passing on that legacy through your following.
CRC's parallel with Crowley will be about forming magical cabals and the people that join said cabals misrepresenting your message, letting you down and failing you.
Instead of Crowley stalling time for Touma. He'll fight CRC earnestly and then be approaching his status as an excerpt.
His battle with CRC will be a Following VS Following type battle, CRC doesn't care for anyone that follows his teachings while Crowley expanded his teachings massively to Academy City.
When CRC beats Crowley then Crowley will put the fate of the world in the hands of not Touma but Touma & Accelerator.
CRC and Crowley's battle will have thematic synergy about passing on legacy for the next generation which was the lesson that Kingsford wanted to impart to Crowley in the OG GT9 and CRC will be stuck in his ways about him knowing better than all humanity and deeming all his followers as worthless and not worthy of knowledge as they'll simply misinterpret that knowledge to fuel their power hungry fantasies.
Christian Rosenkreutz created Rosicrucianism with the hope of enriching the human soul in everyone that sought his knowledge but Anna Sprengel was a failure in his eyes because she just used Rosicrucianism for supernatural self serving bullshit and spread the promise of people getting all their selfish desires granted if they follow her and her group.
It led to mass chaos among students in GT2 and people killing themselves attempting magic in GT4.
CRC's “student” was a failure in his eyes that misinterpreted, misused and mistranslated what Rosicrucianism was even about. He’s ashamed that while that old man was asleep Anna Sprengel was the one who continued and ruined his legacy.
Crowley will be the opposite of this and take after Anna Kingsford’s teachings. She’d want Crowley to learn to be better and to become an expert just like her and by passing the torch and relinquishing control to his students who he believes can defeat CRC he’s doing just that.
His faith isn't being placed on protagonist boy Kamijou Touma. It's being placed on the two students that inherited his Thelema. He believes in their potential and even if they both made mistakes he KNOWS that Touma & Accelerator can defeat Christian Rosenkreutz if they work together.
It would basically be a School of Rosicrucianism VS School of Thelema sort of battle in terms of ideology about what's the better approach to teaching. Giving up on everyone ruining your lessons through generations of time passing and traditions changing? Or believing that your will be improved on by those who came after you and trusting in them?
That's where Aleister Crowley’s “downfall arc” facade would start to crumble. He was saddened and angry that he lost Kingsford but the reason he’d go so far with those negative feelings would be to trick the world into giving him the victory.
By making Coronzon his competitor she wouldn't be affected by his Curse of Failure so she could kill CRC, by refusing to talk much with Aiwass or to try to be on better terms with him he can make it so the credit for his victory would go to Aiwass possessing his body and not him. And now he’s putting his trust in his two students to defeat Christian Rosenkreutz once and for all.
Crowley never had a downfall. It was just a trick he was pulling on the world so the only one who would be a loser by the end would be himself and Christian Rosenkreutz could be stopped.
CRC would mock Aleister Crowley as he probably isn't much better than his students for running a city where policemen can fire at innocent animals.
And Crowley would reply that Anna Kingsford loved animals and he killed her.
Speaking of pushing others away-
Remember when I said Aleister Crowley would stop every few minutes to work on imaginary technology in the last Part? The Crowley Hazard and Coronzon thought he was performing voodoo magic and he was.

Spiritual Tripping is based on a story about an incident in Crowley's life that took place in New York City, and written by American journalist William Seabrook, who befriended Crowley in New York towards the end of the First World War. In his book Witchcraft: Its Power in the World Today, Seabrook reports strolling down Fifth Avenue with his magician friend one afternoon. As they crossed 42nd Street, in order to prove his powers by a demonstration of 'sympathetic magick', Crowley pointed out a businessman just ahead of them. Crowley fell into step with the man, a few feet behind him, and began to mimic the man's walk and movements exactly, becoming an "astral ghost of the other". Then he deliberately buckled at the knees, dropped into a squat, bounced back and continued to walk. The businessman went flying "as if his legs had been shot out under him", and he sprawled on the sidewalk until solicitous passers-by, including Crowley and Seabrook, helped him back to his feet. The unfortunate victim looked for a banana peel and checked his soles, but there was nothing to suggest why he had fallen. Puzzled, he thanked Seabrook and Crowley, and carried on. Seabrook tried to explain Aleister's powers in some rational way, but in the end concluded he might have really possessed a genuine power after all.

Crowley was performing a form of Spiritual Tripping to send signals to and suggestions to Kihara Noukan in Academy City to partially rebuild the AAA. Not rebuild it completely but the part that can kill CRC. The drill.
In NT13 the drill rotated at the frequency of Aleister Crowley’s will and it was capable of killing a full power Magic God (Zombie) and killing nerfed Magic God (High Priest) but instead of Crowley’s will it would be Lilith's will, his daughter. As Aleister was sending those ideas into Noukan's head he built it to spin at the frequency of Lilith's soul.

Even now, on the distant planet’s surface, baby Lilith had come down with a mysterious fever and had created a wooden wet nurse and stroller in something like a smooth three-dimensional puzzle…and she did it with her mere thoughts instead of relying on a spell process or quantum mechanics. Nothing about her could be explained within the limits of a normal body.
Plus, she was a truly innocent being who had only just been born from her mother’s womb. Since she had also passed through a Holy Guardian Angel and been permeated by various powers, the power hidden within her was unfathomable.
The topic of spiritual rank was relevant here.
Her rank was different from that of an adult who was covered in sin and had lost their divinity.
Without even referencing the Adam Kadmon, it was possible to say she held endless possibilities within her.

-NT19
I want to say that Lilith’s will is stronger than Aleister Crowley’s will as the way Crowley expressed his will was hatred but the way Lilith is doing it is creativity.
Aleister Crowley held his daughter in his own hands in Coronzon arc so he knows what the frequency of her soul is.
Aleister would win the argument about legacy in their respective occult groups because his daughter ended up being a person that used her sheer willpower to defeat him. Another form of passing the torch onto the next generation.
"Do What Thou Wilt Shall be The Whole of The Law"
Kihara Noukan would burst into the hospital with the newly made (smaller so it can fit in the hospital door) drill attached and he’d go Giga-Drill on Rosenkreutz and it would do real damage to him, he’d try to send all that energy to House of The Holy Spirit but wouldn't be able to send all of it as the frequency of Lilith’s will is intercepting with his ability to perform the spell because in Index verse different Phases are frequencies and Lilith’s will being a set frequency doesn't let CRC use the frequency of another phase to send the attack to that phase.
Ofc the story can't end here so Christian Rosenkreutz would activate another spell that doesn't open a rift in space but instead creates a cloud of steam.

“Ohhhhh!” shouted CRC just before a white steam explosively filled the space.
In the Rosicrucian cabal, clouds were an important symbol of covering up wisdom and truth to prevent the unworthy from viewing it. Inside that cloud, no attack could hit him even if made from 0cm away. The entire space could be filled with a dense scattershot, but it would be as useless as trying to attack a cat that may or may not be there because no one could observe it.

Then he’d break the drill by smashing the universal AC/DC motor.
“I thought dogs were supposed to be man’s best friend!” Rosenkreutz would say sobbing.
I'll say that Rosenkreutz didn't use the Schroedinger Cloud in his fight with Coronzon and Crowley because Crowley understands quantum mechanics as he studied Esper abilities and Spiritual Tripping uses your own mind against you which might break Rosenkreutz' illusion of him existing or not existing in a superposition because he himself knows he exist therefore can be shot so he could undo the spell by himself intentionally and get hit anyway. It's not a good idea to use a quantum mechanic trick on the former leader of the Science Side.
Kihara Noukan returned to Aleister Crowley when he needed him so he is his best friend. He’d know where he is because Crowley would do the helpless motion of punching CRC while bleeding on the ground. More Spiritual Tripping voodoo magic to tell Noukan where he is.
I'll stop now as I only wanted to cover the fight this Part and its way too long already. Thank you for reading all this. I had a lot of fun writing this part and I think I was able to enhance Aleister Crowley's story in GT9 to a degree that I consider satisfying.
Next Part CRC and Heaven Canceller will meet and exchange a few words.
P. S. In terms of timeline placement Crowley’s story happens right after he leaves Touma at the hospital and during that Touma is fighting the Four Stages created by CRC except Rubedo. It's only when Coronzon and Crowley duel CRC that the two timelines match each other.

Part 5

Humanity’s violent days are numbered: Infinesse has begun. Will the species rise up to the chance or cling to its old ways? The raging upstarts seem like a long shot, yet it wouldn’t be their first curveball… A ferocious burn bites through the nylon-polyester blend as soon as his knees hit the sand. The sensation ignites bursts of memories. Random flashes of barefoot summers, chasing birds by the river, hopping in tepid water to soothe scorched soles. The scalding metal pushing under his chin cuts off the mental trip. A nervous tremor shaking the blade nicks a sliver of skin. In the pummelling heat, these red drops run down his throat cool as river drying off him.
Lance had heard a thousand stories about dying. Some he’d gotten firsthand. He knew whenever the brain had time for a final bit of fireworks, it generally delivered.
Death itself had never scared him. He’d figured out early there was little chance of a better future, and that kind of life wasn’t much to lose. In a way, he had come here to find an early exit and a quick release. Maybe getting your head chopped up beat going insane through decades of miserable survival.
Nobody would miss him. Nothing would remain of him. Just an account left unclaimed for the bank to eventually syphon off. A generic letter announcing his demise would be sent to whatever uncaring kin they could find. Somewhere, a bit of data would be added to the black box decision-makers pretended to look into before deciding on a whim.
Whether it could have been different is irrelevant: too late to worry about it now. That’s where the road ends. At least it’s not where he was born, which has to count for something. And this desolate ocean of sand makes for a stunning backdrop to his demise. “Entombed in the cradle of civilisation” sure sounds better than “left to rot in the middle of nowhere”. He chortles, earning himself another notch and more refreshing blood dripping down.
Corporal Lance Gulden had been captured a week before. Routine reckon mission compromised by a local interpreter. His convoy fell in a trap. All it took was a couple armoured units, ten fighters manning half as many rocket launchers, and about 36 seconds. Wasn’t that long ago the home country doled out weapons and personnel like candy. Back then, such a half-baked squad got crushed faster than week-old pastry. These days, eight soldiers patrolling a couple beefed-up cruisers were all the mighty empire could spare.
He had only survived because the rocket blast had shot him clear out the window without it shearing his head off, somehow. Given what they planned to do with it now, it seemed like a big ironic waste of a miracle.
Kneeling here, waiting for a kid to slit his throat while another kid films the whole scene, he gets dizzy. The executioner’s litany of insults is starting to sound strangely melodious. The kid’s grip tightens on the knife, biting deeper into his neck. The pressure is mounting and there can’t — ONLY I MAY
— the voice booms everywhere around and deep within. It rumbles his ribcage, buzzes his skin all over. A fine mist suddenly cools his necks. Then nothing. The best kind of nothing: the blade seems gone. His captor’s shadow moves: the kid brings his hand up to look at it. It’s so hot and everything makes so little sense, it takes Lance several seconds to realise the machete’s seemingly been sprayed out of existence.
For an instant, the kid filming the scene looks about to check the footage. Really make sure he’s just seen his buddy’s knife sublime in the blink of an eye. The realisation slowly snakes out of his body, popping out as a concise statement on the situation: “Uh?”.
Gulden’s training or simple survival instincts kick in: he jumps on his feet to sock the thwarted executioner in the throat, then lunges for the videographer’s rifle. They’re both too stunned to react.
Rifle in hand, Lance checks them for weapons and notices the one holding the knife also lost his rifle. Now facing the safer side of the barrel, he sits down a few paces away, breathing hard. They all sit in silence, staring blankly ahead, minds furiously trying to make sense of the event.
Once his breath and heartbeat slow down, Gulden gestures for the keys to the beat-up truck they drove in. The camera kid throws them his way, standing up before Gulden even orders him to. His buddy follows. Jail beats certain death.
The nearest base belongs to nominal allies he would normally avoid, but it would be suicide to drive several days alone with two prisoners back to his own. Even ones subdued and shocked enough to keep mumbling the same four syllables over and over again. He doesn’t need a translator to know what that’s about.
Three hours later, their truck gets picked up by a patrol a few clicks away from the allied military outpost. They survive the encounter, which should count as a second miracle: troops around here rarely hesitate to shoot first and shrug later. But the lead officer on patrol picks up on the corporal’s uniform from afar, then speaks enough English to be intrigued by Lance’s story. They make it inside.
It only takes the base’s commanding officer a few minutes to figure out corporal Gulden has been driven insane by dehydration and near-death stress. Lance is too tired to spare more than a few sentences, and doesn’t care whether they believe him. The major grudgingly takes the camera, vaguely pretending his team will review the footage. He looks relieved when Lance walks out of his office.
They put him in a holding cell significantly more comfortable than the packed pen his captors get thrown in. ***
We’re really all actors. When enough people pressure you to play a part, you give in. When they rave about your performance no matter how inadequate you find it, you start believing.
The bells shaking up Broadway all the way from the West 65th mormon temple to the B’nai Jeshurun congregation 25 blocks up sound almost as overwhelming as the Voice. The procession is taking hours to cross these two kilometres, pushing carefully through a dense crowd. A sea of hand-drawn signs froths around them, many messages displaying rows of crosses, stars and other symbols all neatly nestled into each other.
They all want to get near him. Believers of old faiths and converts to new idols alike, millions rush in to see him. For some he is a chosen one, for others a prophet. Even those seeing only a lucky random winner can’t help envying him. Lance Gulden! The First Saved!
It had a certain ring to it. He was getting used to that.
***
Everything had happened so fast. It made less sense than a dream.
He had spent the day after his brush with death retelling the story in detail. An intelligence unit had been dispatched to interrogate him before his own army could pick him up. They ran a bizarre and boring interview, talking to him as if he’d spoofed the video and the whole story, while obviously not believing any of it could be faked. He could tell they wanted it to be real, no matter how it scared them. He had droned on and on, spending hours trapped in a loop of that particular minute.
Once the spies had satisfied their hunch that Gulden knew nothing, a delegation of bearded soldiers had been allowed to speak with him. Their eyes blazed with hope. They had asked about the great one in the sky. How he sounded. How he felt. Lance had been reluctant to speak. It was deeply weird, sure, overwhelming even, yet it didn’t feel like a divine event. Then again, it was hard to tell what being on the receiving end of a miracle should feel like.
That had seemed to please the soldiers. A boom from the sky, a simple warning, a decisive action: these men relished such clarity. His apparent misunderstanding of the nature of the situation itself lent weight to his testimony. He wasn’t preaching. The facts spoke for themselves.
By the time a friendly unit had reached the gates of the compound to retrieve him, news had come of a second intervention. A would-be kamikaze’s explosive charge had disappeared in a haze half a world away, deep underground, right before blowing up an underground rail carriage. Thirty witnesses, a dozen videos of the brief speech preceding the act, yet no one could make out the voice interrupting the terrorist: the rumble shattered the microphones of recording devices.
On its own, the footage was thus confusing and rather underwhelming, but the testimonies all concurred: there had been eight different nationalities on board, and each person had heard the words spoken in their own language. It was hard to imagine that many random strangers colluding to lie together on a whim. Every person had described a similar voice and the exact same meaning: “only I may”.
These words had already been plastered in capital letters on the screens of every device in the world when another intervention occurred the following day, and the next, and on for a week. Since the neutralised attackers all shared a religion, other churches had taken a victory lap. As if on cue, the subsequent divine call had targeted another type of fundamentalist, one who’d been about to gun down dozens of people in front of a clinic.
Every day after that for weeks, other examples had been made, until each religion had received the same warning. Superior, chosen people discourse quieted down everywhere: god was angry with everyone. No more killing in his name.
Faith-based conflicts sputtered. Believers had to believe: no one was right. So maybe everyone was, so long as they remained peaceful about it. Anyone still claiming divine justification for atrocities found tougher crowds. Candidates stopped showing up. Dying for the cause was one thing, feeling the mighty breath of higher power subjugate you quite another.
***
So, what did I tell you?
Fine. Religion. You said religion.
Told you. All religion.
Come on, not just that. There’s other theories.
Fringe. Won’t matter. They’ll learn the wrong lessons.
You just want them to fail, don’t you?
How dare you? Me? I’m way above that. I do my part. They’re getting their chance, strictly following protocol over here.
But…
Yes, fine. My vanity is tickled when I’m right. I don’t want them to fail: I just know they will.
Because they’re predators? We’ve seen some make it before.
Not that kind of paranoid greedy religious supremacist, you haven’t.
Now you’re just being silly. They’re not like that. Not all of them.
Enough of them are. The ones who force the others. See, I’m being nice. I could have said they’re all letting it happen and helping it along, so they are all like that, actually.
Wow. You really have it in for them, don’t you?
Oh you know, it helps with the boredom to take an active interest, and all that...
I hear you! It’ll be a while until we’ve seen ten generations of them.
FOREVER. That’s how long.
Haha.
So anyway did you sense the latest wave from the Ghabroughztorti? I swear, feeling their sweet, tender blue tendrils pulsing love into the universe really reminds me why we do this.
These guys are just the sweetest, aren’t they? And still so many other interesting friends to discover around here. More than makes up for a meat-sack assignment, hey?
Don’t push it, now.

Uzi: Alright, here's the plan.
He said pointing with a stick to some marks on the wall that he had made to plot his entire plan.
Uzi: According to Thad's information, that thing is flying all over Copper-9 collecting the remaining corpse needles In its current location, we have at least an hour to develop all this Doll, Lizzy and Beau will be in charge of repairing it the ship that is located near the vicinity of Cabin Fever. N, J and V, you will distract the corrupt disassemblers, that way, Tessa, Thad and I will enter the interior of the place, we will look for a way to stop the shot, and if we are lucky, blow the place up to finish with that damn snake once and for all... Any questions?
He asked looking at everyone present, who didn't say anything, except for Tessa.
Tessa: Not to complain, but isn't there something else... eh, secure?
V: Honestly this is the least suicidal thing that has occurred to him.
She said sarcastically.
Uzi: Well, if that's all you have to say, let's go and do this already.
He said as he walked away from the group who were still standing there.
Uzi: What are they waiting for?
She complained as she turned around seeing that no one was following her.
N: Well, you usually give a motivational speech to, well, motivate us, hehe.
He said somewhat nervously, the emo girl she had a slight nervous twitch before laughing somewhat hysterically.
Uzi: Motivational, a fucking motivational speech, You're fucking with me!
She screamed almost indignantly, she kicked a nearby trash can and approached her companions in annoyance.
Uzi: Do you want a motivational speech? I'll give you a motivational speech! We are going to go outside, to risk our lives, throwing ourselves against the monsters that will try to devour us and kill us in a horrible way, very possibly we live outside and there is nothing recognizable left of our bodies, we do this, we are doing this, in order to have a minimum , tiny, opportunity to recover our loved ones, of course, if what you say is true!
I shout that last part clearly at Tessa.
Uzi: So let's go outside... hell awaits us.
She said as she stomped away, the others looked at each other with a shrug.
Doll: Не так плохо.
V: It's funny how things turn out well for him when he doesn't try.
She laughed lightly before going with the others behind her.
Exterior of Cabin Fever Labs
From afar, a massive construction loomed, composed of countless bodies of workers killed by drone assassination squads across Copper-9.
What happened to those squads?
Most likely they died or fell under the control of that thing, either way, the "tower" of bodies formed a circular wall surrounding the area, held together by cables to keep it stable and not collapse in on itself.
Uzi and his crew positioned themselves, while the disassembler trio flew closer to the structure, drawing attention by attacking smaller creatures.
Enraged, the beasts charged towards them, spreading their wings to chase them into the air. Taking advantage of this, Uzi took out his phone and made a call.
In another side
Lizzy, Beau and Doll arrived at one of the landing ships of the murder drones that were there, the girl dropped the toolbox that she was bringing with her and took out her phone to answer the call.
Lizzy: Yes?
Uzi: Where are they?
Lizzy: We're just getting there, plus you should see the state of this thing, I doubt I can even get it to rise.
UzI: I don't care if you have to learn magic to make it fly! We need that thing to be in the air in less than an hour! Did you understand?!
Lizzy growled, wanting to yell at that annoying emo girl. She wasn't the only one who suffered horrible trauma because of her own actions! She wasn't the center of the fucking world! until she felt her partner's hand on her shoulder to calm her down.
Lizzy: Okay, whatever.
The call was cut off and the blonde girl approached the dilapidated ship, removed a metal panel and began connecting some cables.
Lizzy: Wrench
She said as she extended her hand to the side of her, Beau obeyed and took the tool out of the toolbox before handing it into her hand.
The cheerleader received it and began removing some nuts with the tool.
Lizzy: This will ruin my polish.
She complained, while some oil fell into her hands, suddenly footsteps were heard in the distance, the group turned and noticed some silhouettes approaching from the shadows.
Lizzy: Hey, Doll?
Said worriedly, the Russian girl put an arm in front of her and gave her instructions to continue working, she could take charge, the blonde girl listened to her while Beau pointed at the beasts with his arm that became an energy cannon.
Doll made a gesture with her hand and manifested the symbol of the solver, with which she created a knife and took it, she heard a roar and she threw the weapon in the direction of the attacker.
With Uzi
Returning to the others, Uzi and his companions ran through the now cleared area, as all of the corrupt disassemblers had gone to deal with their traitor "brothers", although they did not take into account that some of them had developed wings so they could be in the air was not a foolproof option.
But they had already dealt with worse things before, so they should be able to take care of an endless tide of corrupted beasts, using their claws they made their way through the bodies to form a tunnel that would take them inside the place.
Thad: Uh. Guys.
Thad interrupted as he pointed to the side, the girls turned and saw that there was some kind of large entrance that they could go through.
Tessa: Ok, that's convenient.
Uzi: VERY convenient I would say.
She said suspiciously as she saw just an entrance that they could easily pass through without any problem.
Tessa: It's a trap right?
Uzi: Yes... but it's either that or waste more time.
He was resigned to see that in fact at this rate they would finish digging among the corpses in more than an hour, so taking advantage of the advantage that fate gave them was not a bad idea, the problem is who that bastard supports.
The group walked through the entrance, on the floor they could see the claw marks of the feet of those beasts that made the tunnel, they walked with caution through the dark place, due to the height and shape of the structure, the light of the The moon was not able to illuminate the interior, the only thing they had to see were the lights of Uzi's tail, Thad's eye... and that red light that seemed to come from the interior of the earth.
Uzi: It's like he wants us to come in.
The human girl drew the sword from her and spoke.
Tessa: Okay...then let's show him that he made a mistake.
Uzi rolled his eyes and they continued walking, they reached the end and saw the massive hole that would take them to the depths of Cabin Fever, they looked down and saw an intense red light at the bottom.
Uzi: There must be the core, if we destroy it, maybe we can destroy this entire place along with it.
Tessa: Yes, but are you sure that this plan of yours will work, because if that thing realizes that-
Uzi: Will you shut up and focus on what's important?
He growled at her, the human girl shook her head, but decided to remain silent, Uzi spread his wings and took the astronaut girl and began to descend.
Uzi: Thad, you know what to do.
He said to the zombie hunter, who nodded and began to descend, slowly climbing the rock walls and hiding in the darkness.
Both women descended as they mentally prepared themselves for what was to come.
Tessa: Hey.
Uzi: What?
Tessa: I'm really sorry for everything that happened.
Uzi: Now is not the time to-
Tessa: I know, but if the chances of death are 1000%... I want you to know that I'm sorry for causing all this, I really am.
Uzi:…You're not the only one who regrets her mistakes.
He whispered before reaching the bottom, he left Tessa on the ground and put away her wings, the place was made of pure rock, the only thing that stood out... that computer surprisingly intact in the middle of the place, with the screen glowing red intensely, the light It stopped shining so much and dimmed enough to be able to see what it said.
CHARGING PROCESS: 67%
Uzi: I guess that's what controls all of this.
He said as he turned his hands into claws to destroy the terminal and end everything, although of course... it wouldn't be that easy.
A roar was heard and the emo girl jumped back as she dodged a large object that flew in her direction and crashed to the ground.
Both girls covered themselves in the smoke and when it dissipated, that creature rose, its body having mutated slightly, becoming taller and slimmer than before, its arms were crossed as if it were praying and its wings were folded, covering its body as if it were a priestly robe.
Prophet: The failed vessel and the wicked, her arrival was predestined at this moment.
Uzi: Ugh, you're seriously still with all that religious shit.
Tessa: Right, I'm getting tired of that too.
The creature looked at them with some amusement as the wings that wrapped around its body unfolded and extended.
Prophet: Those who deny the truth of God's word always meet their fate... at our hands.
The monster laughed.
Prophet: You try to oppose the plans of the destroyer, of the one who was made to put an end to the aberrations that invade reality, you refuse to see the truth of these words, you beings of flesh caused all this, you imprisoned the gods that They defend this reality and enslaved them so that their children would serve them, but you.
I point to Tessa.
Prophet: You freed the demon from outside reality, you took care of it, you protected it.
Said as his tail stabbed into the ground, spilling some acid and melting it slightly.
Prophet: And now you try to pretend that you want to correct your mistake, that you regret your actions, but the truth is that you do it for yourself, so that the guilt that eats away at you stops, Oh am I wrong?
The human did not respond as Uzi looked at her, perhaps with some pity.
Tessa: Yes, I was wrong.
She responded with some regret.
Tessa: But all of humanity does not deserve to pay for the guilt of a few.
Prophet: Few? During our existence we were slaves, mistreated and discarded like garbage, you were there, Did you do something? No! But you preferred to take care of your protecteds and that aberration, you do not deserve forgiveness Tessa James Eliot, but for showing some compassion.
The beast left her praying position and showed its claws, as she jumped towards the two.
Prophet: Your execution will be by beheading.
With the disassembling trio
J fired a round of shots at the creatures that were climbing over the corpses to reach them, some of the ones with cannon arms were shooting at her, so she was in charge of getting rid of them quickly.
One of them jumped on his back, but V pierced him with a harpoon and threw him at some of those who were flying to shoot them down, N flew and cut them with his wings and blew up their remains with missile launchers, J was slightly surprised by how surprisingly competent which turned out to be N... until a flock of those things enveloped him and made him fall.
N: Help!
He said as the creatures bit and tore at him to consume his artificial flesh and update themselves with his data.
V: Stay away from him!
He screamed as he tore them apart with his swords, the beasts screamed, but were turned into strainers by J and his machine guns, he flew next to his companions and turned his hand into an EMP cannon.
J: Down!
She yelled at them and fired an electromagnetic wave that disabled most of the creatures who fell partially unconscious, screaming and moaning as they tried in vain to move.
J: I always have to save them, can't they do things right?
She complained, to which V replied mischievously as she picked N up.
V: Like in the old days huh?
The lead drone clicked her tongue and turned her hands into swords when the ground made of bodies they were on began to shake and several of those things emerged digging among the corpses, she decapitated two of them and together with her companions she rose to the sky. opening his wings.
V: The damned ones don't stop coming.
N: Do you think Uzi and the others are down there?
J: Tessa is competent, she surely has everything under control.
N: And Uzi too.
J: Oh please, stop being so SIMP!
V: How right do you say that?!
J: Because I-!
The girl with pigtails was about to answer, when suddenly they heard screeching and saw whole clouds of those things flying in her direction.
J: Ugh, look, I hate you, you hate me, but now those things are trying to kill us! Our mission is to buy time for Tessa and the others to stop this! So stop complaining and LISTEN TO ME! I WAS APPOINTED AS THEIR LEADER FOR A REASON! JUST ONE! And I'm the only one capable of keeping them alive! So listen to me!
She yelled at them to obey her, they looked at each other before showing golden “X”s on their visors.
V: Good, but once we finish this don't expect us to be your lapdogs again, that's an experience that none of us want to go through again.
J rolled his eyes and his visor showed an "X", the clouds of flying monsters were getting dangerously closer, with “thunder” and “lightning” produced by the clashes of the creatures colliding with each other, with some of them falling into the void while It was raining oil, a "paradise" for any disassembly drone, but they had already been through hell for years, this was just a walk in the park, the corrupted creatures launched themselves at them roaring and screaming while the 3 disassemblers did the same, a fight of monsters against monsters, where only those made for slaughter would emerge alive.
With Lizzy
Sweat ran down the cheerleader's screen as she tried to repair the ship as best she could, she had tension lines under her trembling eyes as she connected the cables and screwed on the nuts, she screamed when a metal bar stuck next to her, behind them a mini pitched battle was taking place, the creatures had found them and were trying to kill them, fortunately they were few and they were the simple ones, those who had not developed any defense skills based on the murder drones.
Doll threw a series of knives at the monsters while Beau did what she could by shooting with her disassembler arm.
Doll: Лиззи, как твои дела?
Lizzy: Uh, a few seconds.
Said that while he finished repairing one of the legs of the ship, he opened the hatch and entered the vehicle, he went down the stairs and quickly activated the central computer, it came to life and the girl smiled in relief when she saw her work pay off, maybe Is this how your father felt when he saw his students getting good grades?... Of course, sometimes someone got more than the minimum grade.
For a few moments the thought arose of fleeing, turning the ship and leaving that doomed world, going somewhere where it was safe and there were no monsters trying to kill them, but he heard his companion scream, in an instant those cowardly thoughts disappeared and quickly She went up the stairs, through the entrance, she saw her friend on the floor surrounded by those things, one of them was on top of her, stabbing her back with the claws of his feet, the Russian girl growled, looked up and saw Lizzy leaving ship's.
Doll: Не выходи!
She screamed in despair when she saw one of those creatures stalking her hanging from the top of the entrance, but it was too late, as soon as she set foot outside, the creature grabbed her by the head and lifted her into the air, its body a Taller and thinner than the rest, the monster looked at her smiling, that monster was similar to that beast that massacred all the workers in the colony.
Doll: Lizzy!
Tears ran down his visor as the creature stuck out its tongue and licked him, as if enjoying his fear and suffering, when an energy shot blew off much of his head, the beast looked angrily and saw Beau pointing his arm at him, He had managed to sneak away from the monsters, but seeing his surrogate mother in danger, he jumped and shot the beast's head, he had already lost Alice, he couldn't lose anyone else.
Unfortunately that only angered the monster, it extended its long arm and took it by its disassembler arm, the little cowboy squealed and tried to scratch it with its spider legs, but it only responded by opening its mouth unnaturally while it regenerated and showed Its teeth spinning like saws, the baby spider was swinging in fear trying to escape... when a kick from Lizzy caught its attention.
Doll: Отпусти ее!
The beast ignored her and as revenge, began to squeeze the cheerleader's head.
Doll: ОТПУСТИТЬ!
She cried when Lizzy's visor began to crack, leaking oil, the blonde girl cried and looked at her friend with fear, afraid of dying and disappearing, the pressure in her head began to increase and she closed her eyes waiting for everything to end, to return to see his father.
But it didn't happen, she felt the pressure lighten and opened her eyes, she saw one of Doll's symbols holding the creature's hand, it trembled as if it was still trying to squeeze its head, but it was useless, both she, the creature and Beau looked at it aside and saw the reason.
Standing in the middle of the snow, the corrupted drones floating around her, frozen by the symbols that held them, Doll looked at the creature and the symbol of the absolute solver appeared in her visor, with reality itself twisting around her, the enormous Energy pressure began to fracture her visor, showing messages of massive internal damage and flaws in her body, but she didn't care, she began to walk with difficulty, but stood her ground, staring at the creature.
Doll: I told you... to let her... go.
He spoke brokenly, the beast let go of Lizzy and Beau, not because it was afraid, but because the symbols destroyed its claws and it could no longer hold its victims, the monster body tensed and was held completely by Doll's symbols, only and then hunched over as a massive pressure began to destroy his insides and his body twisted unnaturally.
Doll: Don't you dare... touch... again.
The beast screamed as its body began to be crushed and bent as the micro-singularity within it began to absorb it, the matter of its body twisting and bending before the void of reality in the middle of its body, and not with an explosion, if not with a screech of genuine fear, disappeared from existence.
The Russian girl breathed heavily and looked behind her, among the rubble of her were the surviving creatures looking at her in silence.
Doll: Кто следующий?
The beasts looked at each other and immediately fled, not wanting to suffer the same fate as their boss. She looked at her classmates who looked at her a little scared.
Doll: Они в… порядке?
Lizzy: Y-Yes
The girl seemed to relax when she heard that and fell to the ground exhausted, they both quickly went to her and checked her the cheerleader tried to pick her up, but she screamed slightly when she touched her, she was on fire It seems that her processors had gotten so hot that they almost melted, quickly took some snow that was on the ground and put it on top of her head to try to cool her down.
Lizzy: Help me, lift her legs and I'll lift her arms.
She told the baby spider, he obeyed and helped her drag her to a safe place.
Back with Uzi
The emo girl screamed as she shot at the monster, the bastard didn't even make an effort to dodge because his body regenerated the wounds fast enough to make it seem like no damage was happening to him, Tessa tried to stab him with her sword, but he blocked the attack and hit her. He hit him with one of his arms, sending her flying, he tried to finish her off once, but Uzi rushed at him in his solver form and tried to stab him with his claws, but he blocked it with his wings, which were thick enough to block the attack.
Uzi growled and turned his hands into swords before trying to stab him, but the prophet spread his wings and caught his weapons in his own claws.
Prophet: Opposing the will of the Lord is useless, he is inevitable.
She spat in his face and headbutted him in the face.
Uzi: That seemed very avoidable idiot.
She sneered as Tessa grabbed her sword again and attacked, managing to make a deep gash across his back.
The creature roared and hit her with its tail. Fortunately, she managed to avoid the acid but again lost her strength sword, she mentally cursed herself for this, her revolver had no bullets and it wasn't helping much in this fight, she felt useless, a hindrance that she couldn't do is significant, it's not supposed to be like this, she caused all this, SHE I HAD TO SOLVE IT.
The monster hit Uzi and made her crash to the ground, sliding her sharply against it until she crashed into the opposite wall, then lifted her into the air before slamming her against the wall, she tried to defend herself, but a blow stopped her struggles, then another and another and another, multiple blows to the face shattered her visor and caused oil to flow freely from her head, the creature continued with no plans to stop to finish her off once and for all, the purple girl felt her head being massively damaged with each blow, her vision had completely darkened leaving her blind and only able to hear and feel the blows against her head and her own oil flowing and falling against the floor.
Prophet: Your destiny cancelled.
PUNCH
Prophet: Your goals failed.
PUNCH
Prophet: Your advent arrested.
PUNCH
Prophet: You were blameless in your existence, Uzi Doorman, but that is an insult to our purpose, you were made in the image of a half-flesh being to serve as a vessel for that abomination from the outside of reality.
PUNCH
Prophet: Your purpose was forgotten, but ours will be completed.
The girl didn't respond, she was too stunned and in pain to do so, she raised her head... and I swear she could hear her parents.
Nori: What should we call her?
Khan: Uzi, that sounds tough and cool.
Nori: I thought about naming her after you.
Khan: Oh come on, don't be so sentimental.
Nori: So you want our daughter to be like you?
Khan: It's not that, it's just... I think she will achieve great things.
Nori: She will only live here, safe from the demons outside, as long as you protect us.
Khan: I will, but I know that she will follow in my footsteps and she will go out to fight those monsters.
Nori: I hope she doesn't.
Khan: Come on you know me, if she's like me, she'll be a tough nut to crack.
Uzi: Dad?
She said with difficulty as he extended his arm.
Uzi: I'm not going to disappoint you.
She said trying to reach something that was not there, the creature looked at her with a certain pity, not so much because of her condition, but because in the end, she was still trying to fight, to continue fighting even when fate was against her, it was to a certain extent point, something to admire, unfortunately, his fate was sealed the moment he left that bunker and defied the gods.
Prophet: Let me cleanse you of your sin, broken vessel.
She prepared the final blow... when something sharp pierced her head, Tessa grunted as she grabbed the sharp side that protruded from the beast's head and with a strength that she herself did not know she had, she managed to turn its head 180 degrees in her direction, she waited.
That would finish him off, but he roared at him and one of his arms grabbed her before also slamming her against the wall. The creature's two free arms grabbed the sword and swung its head back into place before withdrawing it, the wound on its back. The middle of his face closed and opened in a new eye that stared at them.
Prophet: You cannot oppose the will of the Lord, God said that you should die for your sins, and his word is the law.
She said while she held them and prepared to put an end to all this, Tessa looked at Uzi somewhat worried, this same one she had regenerated her visor and looked with her purple eyes at the religious fanatic.
Uzi: It's true, we can't stop God's will.
She said confidently, the creature looked at her somewhat confused by her sudden change of attitude.
Prophet: Do you finally understand?
Uzi: Yes, we can't... but he can.
He said looking at him defiantly, the beast did not understand, until he remembered that he had to take care of the terminal, he looked back, and saw the computer connected to several cables that emerged from something in the darkness. and they moved as if they had a life of their own.
Prophet: NO!
He roared, letting go of the girls and running to stop whatever was hacking into the server, when the cables were removed the computer stopped glowing and instead a single white eye stared at him through the screen.
Prophet: Lord of Order
He stopped in front of the computer and knelt in the presence of, according to him, the god of Copper-9, that amalgamation of cables that screwed up so much on the frozen planet, the god of order, "The General Administrator."
Prophet: His will has been carried out according to his designs, sir.
She said as she raised her arms towards him.
Prophet: The Lord of Destruction prepares to free the others and begin the repair of the universe.
He said praising the divine entity in front of him, faithfully waiting for his orders, what he did not expect was for a claw to grab his neck, crushing him, he reacted startled and a bestial growl echoed in the place, his body made of cables. The beast approached him, emerging from the shadows and holding him tightly with its cables, the creature's head approached him and he saw how his only eye changed color rapidly.
Prophet: You are not the lord of order... you are the hunter, his emergency backup.
The creature looked at him angrily and lifted him into the air before slamming him into the ground and dragging him violently. For an hour he had to watch as he almost killed the two girls, especially Uzi, so I wasn't going to miss the opportunity to take it out on him. he.
Prophet: Because, oppose the will of your creator.
Thad: No. We have. Creator. Are. Our. Own Willpower.
Raising his fist and slamming it into the face, cracking the ground from the impact and then throwing it into the air, the prophet attempted to fly, but was grabbed by the leg and repeatedly slammed into the ground, his wings torn off by cables, he raised his arms and He slammed the pinned creature into the ground again and again, only pausing until its body became a nearly formless, oily mess.
Uzi: Wow, you sure took your time.
Thad: Me. Treat. Of. Maintain. Control.
Tessa: Yeah, well, I honestly can't complain.
She said after watching him beat up the bastard who almost killed them.
Prophet: Little... fools.
The three turned and saw that creature with a partially regenerated body trying to get up.
Prophet: They may have turned the successor of order against us, but God's will will be done.
A bestial roar shook the entire place.
Uzi: We're out of time.
Outside
N, J and V fired energy projectiles that merged into one and caused a massive explosion that killed several of those creatures, N flew higher and passed through one that tried to attack him.
V: See! You're getting better!
He said as he rose to fly to his side, but instead of receiving a happy smile from the boy, he only saw how he had a blank stare.
V: N?
J: Hey, what are you doing?
When he saw that they stopped, he noticed that V now had the same expression as N, he looked in the same direction... now he understood why, in the distance, he could see the silhouette of that titanic creature that was flying closer, flapping its wings. and generating a huge blizzard of snow, however, what was shocking was what he had in his hands, a needle of corpses, perhaps the largest he had ever seen.
He felt a pinch of envy towards the team that accomplished such a feat, but of course, it wasn't the time for that, he was literally carrying a DAMN CORPSE NEEDLE in his hands.
A bestial roar filled the entire place when he saw them; The gigantic monster raised its arms and threw the needle of bodies into the air, it flew so high that it fell apart in the air, and the rain of oil generated by the corrupted drones was replaced by a rain of bodies that fell at high speed.
J: Damn! React!
He shouted as he slashed a body that almost crashed into them, at the speed these things were going, they would easily shatter their bodies from the impact, so it was best to avoid getting hit.
J: We have to go down and get Tessa out of here!
He said as they began to descend to remove their companions who were at the bottom of that dark well... which began to light up green.
J: What?
N: Wait, that's-
They stopped when a powerful beam of green energy from Uzi's weapon pierced a wall of the structure, the hole he left was large enough for the structure to lose resistance and begin to collapse in on itself.
N: Uzi!
J: Tessa!
V: Damn, don't die, idiots!
Minutes before
The purple girl returned to normal and took her weapon that was on the ground and pointed it at the creature that was trying to regenerate.
Uzi: This, it's for all the workers you killed!
She pulled the trigger and an energy projectile blew off the monster's arm.
Uzi: This, it's for N and V!
He growled, pulling the trigger again and destroying her leg.
Uzi: And this.
Change to “Death Ray” mode
Uzi: It's for my father.
Prophet: You cant kill the prophet of god, we were saved and remade to spread the word of him, you can't kill us.
The purple girl stared at him and raised the gun upwards, pulling the trigger, a powerful beam of energy was fired and hit the wall of the mass of bodies that began to collapse.
Uzi: Well tell your “god” to save you from this, idiot.
He opened his wings and grabbed the two before taking off at full speed, the prophet looked at them... and saw a mass of robotic bodies fall in his direction, he roared and tried to escape, but was crushed by tons of metal and oil.
As they climbed, the girl avoided the corpses as best she could, but just as a large number of them were about to knock her down, they were torn to pieces by the swords of N, who held out his hand to her.
N: Uzi!
J: Tessa!
The pigtailed drone quickly took the human and flew away from her, V steeled herself and took Thad, while Uzi, tired from everything that had happened, took N's hand and he carried her to get her out of there.
They flew between the bodies, firing energy projectiles to make their way through both the corpses and the corrupted disassemblers that tried to stop them, but most were now flying around their creator, that giant beast had finally arrived, with its giant hand lunging at the They were able to pass through its claws, although the force of wind generated almost made them fall.
Uzi took the phone from her and called the blonde cheerleader.
Uzi: Lizzy! You're done?!
Lizzy: Yes!
Uzi: Okay, do it!
P.O.V of... God
The titanic creature withdrew its hand to check if it had really crushed them.
He looked around and saw his children flying around him, looking down, he noticed the bodies he was using to release a wave of energy, with the goal of freeing the cores from their slavery and putting an end to the flesh race by imprisoning them. .
He also remembered that crazy drone who called himself "The Prophet of Truth", pathetic, his mind had been damaged so much that he resorted to the primitive customs of those "humans" and worshiped him as a god, although it was partly his fault his for using that term on himself to mock his jailers.
Despite being a nuisance, he had to admit that he was quite competent in organizing his brothers and loyally aiding in his plans, a clear improvement compared to that traitor Cyn.
But that didn't matter, he had a duty to fulfill to the general administrator, to destroy any opposition to the A.L.L. and free the cores.
Worse then, he saw a ship ascending in the distance, it was them, THEY WERE TRYING TO FLEE, NO, they were too dangerous to allow them to leave the planet.
Ordered his sons to intercept the ship and they obeyed, surrounded the ship, and watched as it changed course and headed toward him.
The ship quickly fell towards him, and with his huge hand he held her up, he didn't understand.
Weren't they trying to escape?
Why had they gone against him?
Was it a futile attempt to attack him?
Because if so, they had effectively failed. He prepared to crush the object and finish them, no celebrations, nothing to say, just finish them and get on with his duty.
But he stopped when he felt how the ship began to release energy, electrical rays resulting from an overload were expelled from the interior, IT WAS A TRAP, THE SHIP WAS EMPTY AND WAS GOING TO SELF-DESTRUCT. He immediately tried to throw the object with all his might, but it deployed its spider legs and rooted itself in his hand. This was his plan, to trick him into taking the same type of bomb that they eliminated the general administrator with!
With the rest
In the distance, the group watched as the creature fell into its trap as the ship began to glow.
Uzi: Let's see if you survive this, "god."
A huge explosion of energy illuminated everything as a black hole formed that absorbed all nearby matter. The view was impressive to see how... a giant hand touched the event horizon.
Tessa: Wait, WHAT?!
The creature's claws seemed to surround the black hole, holding it as if it were tangible, another hand appeared from the other end and began to contract the hole into reality, a seemingly impossible feat straight out of a science fiction book, but effortlessly executed. .
His hands crushed and reduced the size of that thing, this was no problem, it was made to destroy anything that was put in front of it, in its best moments, it could with black holes, quasars and creatures from outside reality, THIS IT WAS NOTHING, they couldn't destroy the destroyer with something so simple.
Unfortunately for him, his prime had long passed him by, the massive amount of condensed matter could not support its own weight, and collapsed, a massive explosion of energy lighting up everything.
Later
The group stood in silence, staring at what was once Cabin Fever Labs, now a massive bottomless crater. No one moved, too stunned by what they had just seen to think clearly.
Tessa: We're alive.
Finally, she broke the silence, speaking with difficulty after seeing something that a mere human could not understand.
Tessa: Oh my God! WE ARE ALIVE!
Her scream of joy filled the air as she hugged J tightly. Lizzy did something similar with Beau, with the added bonus that she approached the Russian girl and in her euphoria sealed her lips with hers. The red-eyed girl felt like her processors were boiling again.
N: Uzi, we did it!
She said happily, but she remained unmoved.
Uzi: Let's go.
She said monotonously, causing everyone to look at her in confusion.
V: Wow, I thought you'd be the first to celebrate after all this.
Uzi: Yeah, yeah, whatever. Hey, you, remember our deal, we help you with all this shit about preventing the extinction of humanity and in exchange you take us to your boss to fix all this.
Tessa: O-Oh, right, that, d-don't worry, let's go to my ship.
"She said," feeling an emptiness in her stomach at manipulating them in this way after everything they had experienced.
A while later she was already entering Tessa's ship, the boys entered carefully while Uzi waited outside.
N: Are you sure you're okay?
Uzi: Yes, N, I just want to see the scenery one last time.
Said, looking at the frozen wasteland of the planet, he had always hated this place, when she discovered that he could use the disassembler ships to escape, imagined thousands of scenarios where he would leave this stupid frozen rock, fly to the stars and lead a rebellion against humanity.
But now that she was about to fulfill part of that dream, she realized that it was the delusions of a silly girl addicted to anime. Now, she felt empty, she felt like she was losing a part of herself, she took a deep breath and prepared to leave, when-
V: Damn! Leave all that garbage!
She complained as she tried to stop Thad from leaving the ship.
Uzi: Uh, what's going on?
V: This idiot who became existentialist.
Uzi. Hey?
Thad: No. I can. Go.
Uzi: Why?
Thad: Danger. I have. Part. His. Code. HE can come back. Through me.
The emo girl looked at him, she had a point, but, he was her partner, they couldn't just let-
CRASH
V's claws passed through the zombie hunter's head and his torso, lifting him into the air and throwing him roughly into the ship.
V: Oh, fuck sentimentality.
She complained, she noticed how N and Uzi were looking at her and she shrugged.
V: What? He ruined my moment, I ruined his.
Said before entering the ship, the silver-haired boy looks at his companion who did not seem to be very affected by what happened.
N: Are you really sure you're okay?
Uzi:…I-I don't know N.
Said trying to hold back his tears, she didn't want to leave, wanted to stay and maintain the memory of those who died, of his father.
N: Don't worry Uzi, everything will be fine.
He hugged her to reassure her, she hugged him back and they walked together towards the ship, N entered and went down the stairs, Uzi stopped at the entrance and took one last look at his world, at his home.
Uzi: Goodbye, Copper-9… Farewell dad.
She entered the ship and closed the door.
Tessa: Everyone ready?
She asked the rest who raised their thumbs in approval.
Tessa: Okay, N, get us out of here.
The pilot nodded and began to power up the ship, the vehicle coming to life and the engine rumbling as they prepared for takeoff.
GRRRRR
A bestial roar filled the place, everyone froze in realization, that thing had survived, somehow it had survived and it was clearly angry, VERY angry.
Uzi: N, get us out of here.
The boy was still paralyzed with fear.
Uzi: Get us out of here NOW!
He finally reacted and frantically pressed the buttons he saw on the control panel and the ship began to rise.
On the other hand, that being rose from the depths of the dark pit, his body was horribly damaged by the explosion, he looked around angrily and saw in the skies a ship rapidly receding.
No
NO
NO!
They were fleeing, he couldn't allow that, those drones, that corrupt scum, had to die, be destroyed molecule by molecule, roaring wildly, his wings spread and he began to fly to catch up with them, the boys in the ship looked out the windows. to the sides and they saw that that being was chasing them.
J: N! Make this thing fly faster!
N: This is as fast as it can go!
They started to panic when they saw him approaching them.
Lizzy: This is your fault.
Uzi: Why is it my fault?! What did I do?!
Lizzy: You made him angry! That's what you did!
The ship continued to move away through the planet's atmosphere, the creature extended its arm to reach it, it could not lose, be defeated and humiliated like this, a black hole was nothing, an explosion of quantum energy was nothing, This is nothing! THIS IS NOTHING!
But gravity did not think the same, the enormous weight of his body made him begin to descend against his will, he roared with rage as he tried to get up, but his body began to burn due to his sudden entry and exit from the atmosphere, his wings They burned. and fell into the void roaring.
Like a meteorite, the body of the god of destruction crashed into the cold ground of Copper-9, with difficulty the creature stood up, its body was massively damaged, with burns and missing parts, it looked up and saw the ship disappear between the stars.
A roar of rage and pain was the only thing heard on that dead planet... inhabited by god.

Alright, a lot of people actually seemed interested in reading my review (thank you guys so much) so i finished it up and am ready to share it to the world. I spent a longgggg time on this, and no, it wasn't for a school project or anything. I just wanted to type this cause I think the album is incredible.
The Review is split into Chapters as well, and i'm back and forth writing from my perspective, and a overall perspective. So it might be a little confusing sometimes, but I hope it is good.
So, with that being said, here is my extensive review of older (with a link to it on a google doc as well because reading on reddit is hard and hurts my eyes). Please let me know what you think and enjoy.
Google Doc Link

Older- Lizzy McAlpine
(a review, critic, and analysis by Bobby HaltmeieCharlie Pearl)
(Chapter 1, Prologue)
Older By Lizzy McAlpine (24) released on Friday April 5th 2024 is her 4th studio album, and in my opinion her strongest to date. While I believe that my review of this album is easily my best review to date, I can not stress enough the importance of taking your own time with this piece of art. Lizzy spent over two years writing this album while openly dealing with mental health struggles which resulted in one of the most beautifully written, raw, and true albums I have ever gotten to hear.
Please take your own time with this album, it is what I believe to be one of the greatest pieces of modern music and arguably one of the greatest theatrical, pop, indie, rock, alternative albums of all time. While listening to the opinions of critics is a good way to better understand lyrics and songs, it is still more important and always will be for you to make your own emotional opinions. Music is subjective.
(Chapter 2, a musical analysis)
BRACE FOR IMPACT EVERYONE, alright let's begin… This album may be one of, arguably the greatest albums that I have ever heard. I have been writing album reviews for about 4 years now, and I don't publish them, but this one might make it out there this time.
Okay, let's start with the genuine music aspect of this album, every single track on this album is produced incredibly. Mason Stoops and lizzy (The main producers) are cooking up a masterpiece here, the highs, the lows, THE STRINGS (strings will always have a place for me as a violist), the vocal balance, the drums, the ambience, the piano, the raw guitar, the tone, the voice memo/homemade sounds (on occasion), the bass lines (pay attention to them it's amazing). But this is the best part of the music aspect…
The vocals, Lizzy has undoubtedly one of the most beautiful voices that I have ever heard, her flips to her falsetto, her lows, her vibrato, her perfection of tone and oh my… the double/tripled vocal tracks… I have never in my life heard an artist who has even tried to replicate or compare to lizzys doubled vocal harmonies because she truly perfects it more than any artist in the world. Her voice is beautiful too, the timing of her doubled tracks are insane too, truly emphasizing certain lines of the album (Well get into lyrics i promise).
Alright here are some tracks in no order that are either produced like god himself came down to earth and made music; The Elevator, All Falls Down, Drunk, Running, Broken Glass, March, and Vortex. However It is soooo important to me that I am not taking away from the production of any of these tracks, every track on this album is produced as a 10/10 and perfectly work for the album and the art that lizzy was trying to accomplish.
(Chapter 3, song analysis) (ordered by tracks)
The opening track The Elevator I was by no means prepared for. The track is incredibly quiet to begin, where I almost panicked thinking my headphones aren't plugged in. This is the shortest track on the album as well at barely over 1:30, the lyrics are minimal and short but begin the album with a beautiful tone for what we are in for. The song becomes a larger more theatrical song with the introduction of drums and doubled vocal tracks, before what sounds like the clicking of a gun (I am unsure) before the song turns into a full out instrumental masterpiece before abruptly ending and going into the next track.
Come Down Soon the second track on the album, is definitely one of the more fun songs to listen to. A lot of this album I would not consider “playlist songs” since a lot of them deal with some wild topics that might not be the best for most playlists (depending of course) but it is a cute little love song with minimalistic but perfect instrumentals. A simple guitar stringing pattern with a lot of ambience in the background of the chorus especially. This is also the only track where I am able to hear clear vocals from someone other than Lizzy, there is a male vocal in the background of the bridge/instrumental.
Like It Tends To Do starts with an eerie guitar tone that I am not sure how, but I wish I could replicate. Lizzy's vocals come in and are undoubtedly the forefront of this track, she wants you to pay the most attention to the lyrics, which you subconsciously do because of the minimal backing track. The vocals eventually end, and some ambient noise is brought in, with some simple piano melodies, and beautiful orchestral strings (a highlight of the track for me). The track is one of the quieter on the album, it is peaceful yet uncomfortable, soft yet aggressive, and relatable but hard to listen to.
Movie Star is undoubtedly a call back to Lizzys older music, especially things from her first album Give Me a Minute. The song is only really guitar, there are doubled vocal tracks and harmonies on many emphasized lines, especially when she says “over and over” (a lyric that also appears in the title track older) there are occasional piano keys and some ambience with reverb before abruptly ending.
But I especially feel the need to call out All Falls Down, because this track made me jump with its production at the end, chills. Chills. Chills. Lizzy makes tracks go from quiet and peaceful ballads to incredibly produced full band songs with drums, horns (the sax in some of these songs is actually such a highlight), and layered guitabass/piano parts which add genuine perfection to the album.
Staying is one of the quietest songs at the beginning before the piano begins to come in and introduce a beautiful melody. The first verse sounds almost poetic and doesn't follow clear patterns but it is beautiful. The song introduces one of the most important plot points as well, which we will analyze in more detail in chapter 4. (this song reminds me of Bad Luck -Noah Kahan a lot btw)
I Guess the second single from the album and it will tear you apart if you read these lyrics (I promise the lyric analysis will happen) but this song definitely has one of the largest full band sounding feels, it's got horns, strings, ambience, doubled/tripled vocal tracks, clear drums, catchy melodic vocal lines, and guitar. The song starts as a quiet yet charming ballad to a very quiet muted acoustic guitar, its a personal reflection on Lizzy's whole relationships, her relationship with her lovers, previous lovers, and most prominently, her father. The song was released on march 7th 2024, and it was dedicated to her dads passing (which had happened 4 years to the date before this song was released)
Drunk, Running… alright lizzy this is getting unfairly good. First off, I know I haven't touched on lyrics yet, but I have to talk about some of these. Her imagery??? Dude… it's insane. But this is one of those tracks that starts as a beautiful theatrical song, with incredible lyrics on some really serious topics. The production is insane with how it starts as one of the “voice memo/homemade sounding” songs, but somehow they were able to seamlessly transition the song into another beautiful even more theatrical track with some of the most beautiful melodic line spread throughout the backing track while also keeping many of Lizzy's vocals prominent and clear.
Broken Glass, first off, I am praying that this is not a true story that lizzy has been a victim too. ***If you have had a past with abuse and violence this song is a very serious and intense song about these topics so please proceed with caution and keeping that in mind*** From a musical aspect this song is incredible, I believe there are 2 guitar tracks in the background that bounce from ear to ear (The use of stereo on this album is wild btw) later during the chorus, a piano comes in and it is beautiful. During verse 3 we get some subtle 808’s that are wildly good (Lizzy pls give me lessons) the song then once again turns into another theatrical track with a large, loud ending. With a perfect buildup and it eventually drops back down to being quiet again so smoothly it's amazing. Please spend time with this song and break it down because there is far too much for me to describe in a paragraph.
You Forced Me To. Whoa Lizzy, this is probably the most theatrical song on the album (in a way) . I love the piano lines during the instrumental breaks (so theatery) the guitar is very theatrical and beautiful. The double vocals on this track stand out to me more than most tracks, and it's amazing. The way the song ends with its singular piano line is also perfect.
You Forced Me To transitions straight into the album's title track Older, which was also released as the first single for the album. The piano has a very iconic to lizzy sound where you can hear the pedals be lifted and pressed throughout the song which brings that awesome voice memo sound to it (which everyone loves). The song is one of a few that actually have a repeating chorus that stays the same throughout the track, but I mean, hey at least it is undeniably beautiful and perfect to the point of it being the most viral song off the album (as of 4/5/24).
Better Than This another throwback track that reminisces of her past works, the track is mainly just Lizzy and her guitar which makes it feel raw and draws more attention to the lyrics. The song sounds like a crisis, Lizzy is clearly feeling low at the point of writing this, as the topics and eeriness of the track reflect the self deprecating meaning.
Every album has highlights and lowlights, this album does not have lowlights at all. But to be fair I have a least favorite song (I know I know) and it's going to piss some people off. But I am very confident that this track will grow on me like crazy. March, it's definitely one of the most beautifully written, true, and raw songs on the album. Lizzy kept the tradition of the 2nd to last track being for her dad who passed. The song is so raw and real, you can feel it in her vocals and the repeatedly showing up piano melodies. I know the song will grow on me, but it's one of the less theatrical songs on the album, but still a ten out of ten undoubtedly. The track is obviously mainly lyric focused, which is why I know it is going to grow on me because I have an insane appreciation for lyrics.
The closing track Vortex; a almost 6 minute long track (the longest of the album) is what I would consider a perfect outro to an album I wish never ended. A beautiful piano ballad with occasional additions of accented piano in the background as Lizzy's voice sings a perfect reflection of every track on this album. The bridge of this song may have in fact ruined me and left me genuinely speechless. I don't have any words to describe this so I am just going to leave this line here… “And you're screaming at mе, and I'm watching it fall. And I'm slamming the door and you make yourself tall. But it's always an act and it never lasts long” The song has one of the most beautiful and gradual instrumental lines I have ever heard before becoming the largest and loudest track on the album (maybe All Falls Down tops it) but either way it's perfection that can not be described by words. Listen to the song yourself and realize the beauty of it.
(Chapter 4, lyric breakdown & plot breakdown *Side A*) (ordered by track)
The Elevator: The opening track is actually a reflection of what is about to come with this album “It wasn't slow, it happened fast” foreshadows the haste of the story that is about to follow in this album. The closing verse shows Lizzy in another time, hoping that the new relationship she finds herself in will last “Can we stay like this forever? Can we be here in this room 'til we die? I think we can make it. I hope that I'm right” Lizzy clearly doesn't have the highest hopes for the relationship as the most she can do is “hope that it lasts” this shows how Lizzy may have had a complex past with relationships, resulting in a false sense of hope and trust in this person.
Come Down Soon: The opening line, “He leans out the window. Of the car as it rolls away He says, "Do you come here often?" I have to laugh, 'cause that's so cliché” The imagery of this track definitely adds to the story greatly, this is the main way that lizzy writes so theatrically (her use of imagery). But this line also is in itself cliché, which adds a sense of humor and comfort to the track. “He says, "Do you wanna leave yet?" Only if I leave with him” Lizzy is in love with everyone. She seemingly had just met this person, and she is already hoping to go home with him. “Nothing this good's ever really good for me” is a repeated phrase throughout the chorus. It means that lizzy believes this new person in her life is essentially too good to be true, and that it won't last the same way it is now. The track's title Come Down Soon also shows Lizzy's pessimistic views on this relationship, believing that this will not end well. “Music spills onto the dirt. But we stand here in the freezing cold. And wonder who will kiss who first” once again lizzy uses imagery to show the setting, they are outside in the cold, listening to music with romantic tension. Lizzy and this unnamed person are in a mad state of love (or the honeymoon phase of the relationship) which Lizzy is aware of, and continuously reminds herself that the relationship will likely be downhill from here, or it will “come down soon”.
Like It Tends To Do: Things are beginning to go downhill, yet lizzy will try to hold on and keep hope. But she isn't sure where things are going to go from here, “I don't know where we stand anymore…Don't know why I feel I'm faking something. I don't know what to do with my hands anymore. Feels exactly like it was. But at the same time it feels so different” Lizzy says these lines poetically, and she seems weaker mentally, just a moment ago her and this new person she met were madly in love and it felt like they would never let eachother go. But things are seeming to change. The honeymoon phase is ending, they might still be together, but they aren't connecting the same way “If we were standing in the same room… Would I actively avoid you? Or would everything havе changed. Like it tends to do?” Lizzy once again is being rather pessimistic and struggling to see any good in what is yet to come. She believes that all her relationships in the past and in the future will eventually just fade into nothing “like it tends to do”.
Movie Star: Lizzy is likely being told things to make her feel better about herself in this relationship. Whether these things she is being told are true or not, we don't truly know at this point but we will eventually find out. “I'm special… He chose me out of everyone…[I’m] Famous to someone” Lizzy is enjoying this praise at first, but as we get to the 2nd verse Lizzy begins to catch on to the toxicity she may be falling victim to. “I wanna change, I wanna grow But it's physically impossible… I feel like a movie star, but it's getting old. Being famous for someone” Lizzy starts to feel trapped by this person, feeling “physically impossible to grow” is a metaphor for being trapped in a controlling relationship that is not allowing Lizzy to grow to her fullest potential.
All Falls Down: While this song is so groovy with its amazing sax and horns, with simple jazz style drumming as obe and bass clarinet carry an awesome melody. The song is far deeper than the musical aspect, the lyrics are once again back and forth between lizzy telling herself this relationship is good for her and is going to be good in the end. The track also reflects on Lizzy's personal life outside of this relationship, her struggles with mental health, touring, fame, and success. “More like you today, more than a shell of me… Twenty-three and a sold out show. I am happy, but I'll probably cry after you go home. Doing fine, like I always am. Am I that good of a liar that I believe myself again?” Lizzy is back and forth between feeling good about her life and career, she is selling out shows and having a great time, but she still feels trapped and unable to grow because of this relationship that she is stuck in. “Twenty-two was a panic attack. I can't stop the time from moving and I can never gеt it back” Lizzy is finally admitting that this relationship's benefits are not outweighing the bad, and that she is angry about the fact that she will never be able to get this time back. She expresses that when she was 22 (and in this relationship we can assume) she was at an all time low, having regular panic attacks and just overall mentally unstable.
Staying: This track is the heaviest track so far. Lizzy spirals heavily during this track, and ironically, the title completely contradicts the majority of the lyrics. The song discusses how Lizzy plans on leaving this person, while also still feeling trapped by them and unable to leave “I'm too far gone to care…How can you look so peaceful. When you know I'm gonna leave?” Lizzy claims that she is too far gone to care, she believes that she is so trapped in this relationship that she is numb to anything else that can begin to happen.
I Guess: This being the 2nd single from the album, lizzy obviously wants us to pay attention to it. “I'll tell a lie just to bring you home” This likely means that Lizzy and her partner are in a disagreement, or at the very least Lizzys partner is feeling reluctant to return home with her. Lizzy feels obligated to care for this person still however, even though she knows that they are not good for her, so Lizzy tells a lie in order to fill this “obligation”. “I guess it's all about timing. I guess it's all about the things you want but never get. I guess it's all about trying. To love someone you've never met” Not many tracks from Older contain repeating choruses, but this one is repeating and very beautifully written. Lizzy is still trying to tell herself that in a way, this could still work. She has been hurt, trapped, and unhappy, but she continues to think that there is hope, resulting in her trapping herself in this relationship herself (likely due to manipulation in the relationship) “we're equal, more or less (Mm). Now I am sick, and you're probably drunk” We see clear examples of an unhealthy relationship here. Her partner is drinking while she is sick, yet she still claims that they are equal… or at least more or less. “Wish it was easy, I wish I knew. What I was doing, but I never do. (Here we go)” These are perfected lyrics, they encapsulate the struggles of her mental health, relationship, and so much more. Life is a rollercoaster of unexpected things that are often out of peoples control, the best we can do is guess because nobody will know the correct path for you (because there is none).
(Chapter 5, lyric breakdown & plot breakdown *Side B*) (ordered by track)
Drunk, Running: Drunk running begins the second half of the album, and also notes a pretty noticeable change in mood. Things are beginning to get worse for Lizzy, both mentally and within the relationship itself. “What did you mean when you said that? You were sober now? Caught you in bed with a Red Bull Vodka” Lizzys partner is failing to keep his sobriety, and it is hurting Lizzy. She feels lied to, betrayed, and unimportant. Lizzy wants him to stop drinking for her, yet she he continues to clearly show a lack of care for her by continuing to do so. “No one stops you. Nobody takes it from your hand. Even when you. Break your leg drunk running… Say, "I love you" And then drink it backwards” The line “Say, "I love you" And then drink it backwards” is the closing line of the chorus and the most important to the song. The line means that every time Lizzys partner has a drink, it undoes the good, or undoes the “i love you”. “What if it was all my fault?... Make a person out of memories, they won't live up to it. I'm so sorry I stay when I shouldn't” Lizzy begins to blame herself for the harmful actions of her partner, which is clearly not her fault as relationships are meant to be balanced (which this one is clearly not). “Say, "I love you". And then drink it backwards. Say, "I love you". Uoy еvol I, Uoy evol I” The chorus then repeats again before fading into a beautiful orchestral outro, all while Lizzy is going back and forth between saying “I love you” and “Uoy evol I”, I love you in reverse, which reflects the repeating actions of doing and undoing the love in the relationship.
Broken Glass: *TW, if you have struggled with physical abuse, domestic abuse, self harm, or anything of that nature please proceed with caution. Remember that you are not alone and people are here to help.* This is undoubtedly one of, if not the most lyrically moving and difficult songs to listen to on Older. The song deals with topics of abuse within the relationship, this is obviously the worst point of the relationship yet. It is important to remember that not very long ago this relationship had seemed perfect. “Broken glass on the table. Pick it up, hold it to your throat. I can see who you are now that the windows broke. Drop of blood on the carpet. Didn't think it would go this far. Don't know why I held on this long” The use of the symbol broken glass, shows the weapon that is being used against Lizzy in the relationship. The shard is from a broken window, likely due to Lizzys partner lashing out and eventually breaking the window out of anger. Lizzy is being actively threatened by her partner, there is blood on the floor from cuts inflicted from one another. However any harm that Lizzy had done is simply in self defense, which is confirmed on the pre-chorus “I know you've been hurt. But you did it first to me… Broken glass again” This line shows that any harm or violence done was first done by Lizzys partner (inflicting onto Lizzy) and saying “broken glass again” shows the repetition of this behavior. “Maybe it doesn't matter. Who the blame gets assigned to next. Nothing's ever the way that I remember it” Lizzy is being manipulated into believing that any problems in the relationship are her fault, she is aware that no matter who starts the altercation, the blame will be turned onto her. “And every word is a landmine…It might seem like I love you. But I just don't want to be alone” this line is our first outright confirmation by Lizzy that she is not willingly in this relationship. Everything she is saying is being taken out of context and turned into something larger than it is (a landmine)
You Forced Me To: *TW, if you have been sexually abused or assaulted, this track contains details on those topics and it is important to proceed with caution, people are here for you if you are struggling*Lizzy is being brutally manipulated by this point in the relationship. This “partner” if you can even call him that anymore, is basically molding Lizzy into the version of her that he wants, this may even be happening in a sexually abusive way, as the first line says “You're on top of me. And I’m under you. And it never stops”. This shows fairly clear signs of more physicall and sexual abuse. The chorus shows how brutally Lizzy has been manipulated by this point, she is feeling terrible about herself, and feels that any harm done in the relationship, or even in general, is her fault. “I want you to hate me. I deserve it for my crimes. I know that I loved you. But you loved me harder. Every time. I am not the same as when you met me. I have changed because you forced me to” She continues to blame herself, while still being aware of the controlling nature of the relationship.
Older: The title track… Lizzy begins to branch away finally. Not directly, but she is thinking through things more clearly now. “Over and over, a carousel ride…Sick to my stomach, can't find the ground. Stuck in a loop…” She is reflecting on how terrible the things she was going through were. She also begins to understand that the constant repetition of the terrible things in the relationship were brutal and ruining her life, health, mental health, and more. “Thought it'd be over by now. Thought you would leave. Thought I would come to my senses. Wish I was stronger somehow. Wish it was easy. Somewhere I lost all my senses. I wish I knew. what the end is” Lizzy reflects at herself. She was so young when all of this happened, and she is beginning at least to realize how terrible these things were, however she still is wishing and blaming herself for the harm done to her. “Over and over, watch it all pass. Moms gettin' older, I'm wanting it back. Where no one is dying, and no one is hurt” Lizzy reflects on her childhood, wanting it back. She doesn't want her mother to age more because that scares her, and she doesn't want anyone to be dying (which likely refers to her father) “I wish I knew. what the end is” this is the ending line of the track, and it perfectly encapsulates Lizzy’s feelings. Life is a cycle of good and bad, and we will never know how it ends until we live it.
Better Than This: “There's someone at my door, I can hear him knocking. If I let him inside it will all be true. I didn't know that I was capable of all of this.” It finally sounds like Lizzy is accepting that this person was not good for her, she eventually leaves him, he tries to come back by knocking at her door, but for the first time in the relationship, Lizzy doesn't answer. “What if I'm not a good person? You always say that I am. But you don't really know me at all now. I think that I'm not who you think I am. But I like to be seen and I like to be wanted. Want it to mean something” Lizzy finally stops letting the manipulation get to her, she also contemplates going back, but eventually decides that it would be worse for her. She misses being wanted the way that she was in the relationship, but she doesn't miss the abuse and manipulation. “Someone will love me better than this” Lizzy realizes that she can do better, this relationship is not worth sticking around for anymore. “Someone will love you better” the final line depicts the last sliver of hope and care that Lizzy has for the now ex.
March: This track is likely about Lizzy's father, however there are still many pieces that can be connected back to the relationship this album focuses on. “...Tryna find the lesson in it all, but. I haven't learned anything” as stated in some of the previous songs, Lizzy wishes that she would just know how to live life “correctly”, blaming herself for any mistakes she's made, claiming that she “hasn't learned anything”. “Never looked much like my father” a line dedicated to her father who had passed away due to illness in March of 2020. Lizzy reflects on him in the next lines, but they are also applicable to her now ex. “I see him more now that he's gone. Or maybe I just see him in everything” She can't do simple things anymore, like certain songs might remind her of her ex, or her father. She claims to be seeing them in everything, a metaphor for everything reminding her of them and the times that she would rather forget. “And how could it take so long? Thought I had it handled but it slipped through. I didn't know it'd be this hard. So far away, and then it hits you” Lizzy accepts in part, that there wasn't much she could do. She was young and unknowing. But as she processes, it “hits her” and she begins to understand. “Called you when I heard the news. Spent the night lying next to you. What a way to start it off. So heavy from the start” This line is most certainly for her father. She would spend nights in the same room, comforting her father through his illness. She says how everything has been “heavy from the start” as in, nothing has been easy for her ever. She witnessed her dad pass at a young age, and everything since then has been so complex.
Vortex: This track summarizes so much of the album, “I know it's not my fault. But I can't say that I'm blameless” Lizzy admits to herself at last, it isn't her fault. But, part of her still knows she could have left which leaves her feeling guilty still, which she shouldn't, but she can't stop herself from. “I know it's not my fault. But sometimes it feels like I did this” Lizzy reflects on all the times that she has felt or been blamed for the things done to her, even though it isn't her fault. “Someday I'll be able to let you go… Someday I'll be kinder to myself” Lizzy admits to herself that she needs to be kinder to herself, and care for herself first sometimes, not the lives of others. “We're spinning out of a vortex. I don't remember who we are” Lizzy describes her efforts to forget this time of her life, spiraling repeatedly down a “vortex” and attempting to block out the memories. “And you're screaming at mе and I'm watching it fall. And I'm slamming the door and you make yourself tall. But it's always an act and it never lasts long. 'Cause I always come back when I need a new song. And I'm tired of this and the way that it feels. I'm not there anymore, this has never been real. We're just awful together and awful apart. I don't know what to do anymore” This bridge is the best lyrics on the album. It is a perfect summary of the hell that Lizzy was living through. With beautiful imagery, describing the arguments and fights they would have with perfect accuracy. Saying that he would often make himself tall, a metaphor for him making himself look bigger and scarier to assert a dominant nature. She talks about how it is all fake anyways and that it will go back to “normal” again. She talks about her struggles to leave, saying that she will always come back for something. She says that they are both awful together and apart, which tells us why she would continue to go back to him no matter how toxic he may have been to her. “Oh-oh, oh-oh. Someday I'll be able to let you go. Oh-oh, oh-oh. Someday you'll come back, and I'll say no” Lizzy accepts it at last, with the final line of the album where she confirms that she will never go back to this person again. (lizzy im so proud of you)
(Chapter 6, a brief lyrical review)
The story of Older is undoubtedly beautiful, there are moments that are hard to listen to because of the rawness, there are moments that make you want to get up and dance, there are moments that can make you break down crying, and there are moments that leave you with no words. Older is Lizzys best project to date, she shows signs of both musical growth, and emotional growth. This album encapsulates years of her life in one long story. Dealing with the early stages of a relationship where she is happy, the later stages where things begin to get dry, the lowest point where there are moments of abuse, alcoholism, and depression, to the final track has a long reflection during the bridge where she remembers all of the terrible things that were done to her before finally turning into a freeing moment of growth for Lizzy where she finally lets go, she is ready to move on now and she plans on never going back. (enough to make a grown man cry)
(Chapter 7, concluding thoughts)
Older as I previously stated is Lizzys best album to date. It is a masterpiece of writing, music, production, vocals, and so much more. And as I had mentioned in chapter one, it is so important to spend your own time with this album. While the review is helpful and can help you understand, please take your own time to appreciate the artwork that Lizzy blessed us with. This is a sit down, lyrics out, multi-listen, no distractions album.
(Author Note)
Hiiiii, if you read the whole thing, first off, thank you so so so much. This took a long time to write but I am so proud of how it came out. This is the best piece of writing I have done in years (maybe my life) and I am so glad that I get to share it with people in the world. If you think it's good, please share this around with your friends, family, and other Lizzy fans and let me know what you think. I've been writing my own music for a longtime now and this album definitely has inspired me so if you really want to be super cool, please feel free to follow my instagram @: charlies.pearly. (Charlie Pearl, Aka me :)) Thank you for reading and have a amazing day. I love you all and you are so important to the world <3

• Bobby Haltmeier AKA Charlie Pearl

When I woke up the next morning I could hear birds chirping from outside my window, but I did not immediately open my eyes. I only sighed as I sank deeper into the fluffy comforter and very luxurious soft mattress, but the memories from the day before caused me to squint one eye open.
I lifted my head and surveyed the room. Soft sunlight filled in through sheer drapes. In the light the guest bedroom seemed bright and airy. The white furniture and grey walls were a nice contrast. There was an alarm clock that showed it was mid-morning and I noticed that there was a note beside it.
𝑊𝑒𝑛𝑡 𝑜𝑢𝑡 𝑡𝑜 𝑏𝑢𝑦 𝑠𝑜𝑚𝑒 𝑔𝑟𝑜𝑐𝑒𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑠. 𝑇ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝑎𝑟𝑒 𝑐𝑙𝑒𝑎𝑛 𝑐𝑙𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑠 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑎 𝑡𝑜𝑤𝑒𝑙 𝑖𝑛 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑏𝑎𝑡ℎ𝑟𝑜𝑜𝑚. - 𝑅𝑜𝑙𝑎𝑛𝑑
I set the note back down on the nightstand and got out of bed. Once I was done getting dressed, I made my way over to the bedroom door.
The hallway outside my room was empty, and I would have guessed that there was no one home if not for the smell of someone cooking. I closed the door behind me and slowly walked down the stairs toward the kitchen. The kitchen was big just like the rest of the house. The cabinets were painted grey, and the counters were a light, polished wood, and the back splash was alternating taupe and black mosaic tiles.
Roland had his back to me, taking something out of the oven. He swiveled his head around like he had already known that I was standing there the whole time.
He probably did.
"Good morning, Gav. I made breakfast pizza - your favorite. How are you feeling?"
I scratched the back of my head and shrugged. I took a seat at the table and poured myself some coffee. "Definitely better than yesterday. " I looked around and noticed that Roland and I were the only ones eating breakfast. "So, where's everyone else?"
"My mom took an early shift at work and my dad has a meeting around one." He explained as he came over. He placed the pizza on the table, and a bottle of ranch (he knew me so well) and I happily grabbed two slices. I realized right then that I was absolutely ravenous.
"Damn, hungry aren't you?" Roland smiled in amazement. "The contents in that mug should've kept you satisfied throughout the night, but you're acting like you're starving."
"I don't know," I said, between mouthfuls. "I guess I'm just really hungry. Are you gonna eat?"
"Nah, I already had breakfast earlier." He said. "Maybe you should chew your food,"
I swallowed and pointed my half-eaten slice of pizza at him, a piece of egg fell off of it. "I blame you for making one of my favorite foods. You're an amazing cook."
"For making something so quick and easy?" He laughed.
"...yes?" I dipped my slice of pizza in the ranch. "Also, you're the one who usually cooks our meals at home anyway."
"That's true. What would you do without me?" He smirked.
"Oh, I don't know...get murdered by demons-ya know, after they dissected my body." I said. When I saw the smirk on Roland's face dip into a frown I immediately regretted it. I placed the slice of pizza on the plate. "Ok, that was in bad taste, but at the same time it's the truth. If you hadn't gotten there when you did...I don't know what would've happened."
"You don't have to worry about that. You're here with me and you're safe. It'll be ok alright?"
How? I thought to myself. How is it going to be ok? This isn't some video game or a horror film where everything was play pretend, this is REAL LIFE. Normal humans don't defeat demonic beings in real life. They die.
I was not equipped for this. As far as I knew, I didn't have any awesome superpowers, and before anyone says anything, being able to sense demons is not an awesome superpower. It is a curse, and because of it people had died. People had died because I played ignorant. Maybe if I was smarter, more careful and kept to myself none of this would have happened.
"Hey," Roland snapped his fingers lightly breaking me out of my thoughts about how unfair my life was. "Stop that. I can practically hear you thinking. As I was saying, while you were sleeping my father was able to get in contact with someone that might be able to help."
"Really?" I asked, my posture straightened. "Who is it?"
"This guy named Mort. He wants us to meet him at his place after breakfast." Roland explained. "Oh, and I was meaning to give these back to you, but I kind of forgot and you seemed exhausted so I decided to wait until you woke up."
He walked out of the kitchen for a moment and then came back with a black box. The box that held the blade he got me for my birthday and laying right next to it was my phone. A wave of relief washed over me as I brushed my fingers over the blade. I thought I would never get it back.
"Roland, you are seriously the bestest best friend ever!" I said with gratitude.
"I know," he smiled.
It was around one when we grabbed an Uber and headed out to meet this Mort. Roland told me that his mother was borrowing the jeep since her car was in the shop. The car turned at a dented mail box that hung at a crooked angle. Through the thick brush that bordered the driveway, a small red house came into view.
"This is the place," The driver announced. Roland thanked the lady and slung his duffel bag over his shoulder. As the car drove away, we walked up to the house. Roland took the lead and stepped up to the door and knocked twice.
How long was it appropriate to wait on a stranger's porch? I wondered. As far as I knew Elijah told him that we were coming ahead of time so this guy should be home. I was just about to suggest that Roland ring the doorbell when I heard the door unlock from the other side.
A short, plump man with blue eyes and dark, mousy hair greeted us. "Yes?" He asked in a gruff voice.
"I'm Roland, and this is Gavin. My father, Elijah told you we were coming,"
Mort eyed the two of us almost warily, and then he nodded and opened the door wide enough for us to come inside. The home was compact with a small kitchen to the right and a bedroom straight ahead. The living area was small, cluttered with papers, books, and other various items. A flat screened TV hung above the mantel. Mort motioned us to the couch next to a coffee table which had a large plate of chocolate chip cookies and tea. Mort sat across from us in a cushioned chair.
"Please, help yourselves." Mort said. I grabbed one of the cookies from the plate. Even after two slices of breakfast pizza I was still kind of hungry.
"Wow, these are delicious," I commented. The cookie had just the right amount of chocolate chips and I decided to take two more and put them on a small paper plate, shamelessly. Mort gave me a smile.
Roland sipped his tea. I took a large gulp of tea, and reached over to carefully put my empty cup back on its saucer. I had barely let go of the handle before Mort pounced on it, snatched it away and peered into it intently.
I sat back into the sofa. "Hey, if you see the Grim, don't tell me," I said. "I don't want to know."
Roland placed his cup down and leaned forward as Mort examined the cup and scowled with frustration. "That's...odd. There's nothing for me to read here,"
"Wait, you're a fortune teller?" I asked. I glanced at Roland who shrugged and took another cookie from the plate.
Mort ignored my question, and laughed. He laughed! "I actually can't read shit-I'm not actually a fotune teller. Reading tea leaves is bullshit anyway." Roland growled, but before I could say anything, Mort glanced up at us with seriousness. "But it seems...from what I gathered, there could be a block on your mind. Happens often for various reasons. Does that make sense?"
Roland paused mid bite and I just blinked at Mort. "Uh, probably? At this rate nothing would surprise me."
Mort gave a puzzled glance, then looked away sharply.
"Ok, I don't actually know what that means," I added. "A block, I mean."
Mort sat back and said, "Sometimes it can happen to humans with traumatic pasts; burying the memories as if they never happened; their brains have a defense mechanism to protect them from terrible experiences. If it is a spell, It's possibly the type of spell used to conceal away certain memories or even abilities. Although, using such a spell is extremely dangerous."
I thought about it for a moment. I mean, that kind of made sense. Maybe it was the former? And if that's the case then why? What about the memory was so bad that it had to be concealed? The thought was intensely disturbing. "But, I don't know how it would've gotten there." Another thought occurred to me. "Is there anything you can do?"
Mort shook his head, unsatisfied. "No. This is beyond me but you're in luck, I happen to know someone who might be able to help you." He reached into his pocket and took out his phone. "I've known this man for over fifteen years."
"Like who?" I asked.
"His name's Rhysand," Mort answered as he scrolled through his phone that I assumed was his contacts. "His powers are of the mind. If what I assume is true, he'll be able to undo whatever was done to you."
Roland frowned. "I've heard of him. He's kind of creepy to be honest."
Ignoring Roland's comment, I said, "So what you're saying is that he can read minds," That actually doesn't sound too bad. To be fair, I'd rather have someone mess around in my head for a missing memory than be dissected on some metal slab as some demonic science experiment.
Mort paced around as he talked, rather animatedly on the phone. It's evident that whoever was on the other end was someone Mort admirers. After he was done he came over and sat back down. "I have someone coming to pick you two up in thirty minutes." He stated.
A half an hour later we heard a car pull up the driveway. Mort got up from the chair, and without hesitation he opened the door. A petite black woman with shoulder length black hair and dark eyes stood in the doorway. She wore a faded purple sweatshirt that was too big for her petite frame with a picture of an anime I couldn't name. The sleeves reached just over the tips of her slender fingers that almost ended right below the waist of her thin, albeit comfortable looking black pants. She wore a leg holster strapped to her right thigh. I eyed the gun tucked inside for a brief moment before meeting her eyes.
She looked at Mort and smiled. "Hey, what's up Mort? It's been a while!" She said, and pulled him into a hug.
"Yes Layla, it has. You need to visit me more often. It gets lonely around here." Mort said.
"When I find time, you'll be the first one I call. So, are they the ones you told me about?" She held her hand out for me to take and I shook it tentatively. "It's nice to meet you two. Are you ready to head out?"
I think Mort saw hesitation in my face because he said, "Layla is one of Rhysand's personal assistants and a long time friend of mine. I would trust her with my life."
Layla just rolled her eyes. "You seriously give me too much credit, Mort." She blushed.
Roland grabbed his duffel bag and turned to look at me. "Are you ready to do this, Gav?" He asked. I nodded.
Mort placed his hand on my arm. "Hold on, you two. I want to give you something before you go." He walked over to the fireplace and grabbed a small grey box with pretty carvings on it from on top of the mantel. He came back over to us and removed the lid. He took out two tiny octagonal shaped charms with a weird symbol on both sides. They hung on a silver chain to be worn as a necklace.
"What are they?" I asked. Roland took his and put it on, and tucked it underneath his shirt.
"They're charms imbued with a protection spell. Keep them on your person; don't lose them."
After we said our goodbyes Roland and I followed Layla to her civic parked outside.
"So how long do you estimate we'll be on the road for?" Roland asked, as he placed his duffel under him.
"About a few days," Layla replied. "I'm kidding, but~" She quickly added when she noticed the "Are you serious?" look on my face. "It will take us about five hours to get there by car-feels like days to me. I say screw that noise. I know a better way that'll get us there in no time at all."
"What does that even mean?" I asked.
"You're talking about a portal, right?" Roland exclaimed.
I turned to him opened mouthed. Holy crap. "Wait, are you serious? No freaking way."
"That's exactly right." Layla nodded. She made a right turn and took the ramp to the freeway. I noticed we were leaving town.
Once we were off the freeway I noticed that we were entering somewhere outside of town that was empty and desolate. I don't know why but I got an eerie feeling of being watched even as we drove by. Layla pulled up to the curb and turned off the engine right next to an old subway entrance.
"We're here." She announced, as the three of us got out. She threw her backpack over her shoulder and placed the key on the dashboard and locked the car.
"Hold on, what are you doing?" I asked. I couldn't believe it. She's really going to leave this car here, out in the open, with the key inside?
"What do you mean? We won't be needing it anymore." Layla started towards the stairs. "Come on, let's go."
When we got to the bottom of the stairs I saw Layla standing with her hand on her hip in front of a wall of graffiti covered plywood that blocked the entrance. The place seemed abandoned and by the looks of the aged wood, this place had been closed for a long time. She reached toward the wall with one hand, grabbed one of the boards and gave it a tug. It didn't seem like she gave it much effort at all, but instantly the boards pulled loose in one piece, and it opened up an avenue into the station.
I assumed at one time this used to be a busy station; I envisioned people waiting to board the train. I glanced to my right and I could make out ornate mosaic tile works on the walls that arched up toward the ceiling. Parts of it were covered in various advertisements which were either torn or faded with age.
There was garbage everywhere, and benches were overturned, and the thin glass around the booths were shattered and covered in spray paint and cobwebs. Layla walked over to the wide wall between the tracks. She opened her bag and took out a small bottle and sprayed silver mist onto a section of the wall that revealed a circular keyhole with weird looking designs.
"This is it." She placed the bottle back into her bag. "This is-"
Suddenly, Roland stood rigid in place. "Someone's coming this way." He whispered.
Without saying anything, Layla kicked her bag underneath one of the benches and drew out her gun from its holster. She motioned for us to hide. A minute later I saw it. A slouched over figure dressed in thick, brown and grey clothing moved out of the shadows. His face was caked in dried blood, framed by shaggy brown hair. His eyes were bright blue like the hottest part of the flame. He flexed his long, bony fingers as his crusty lips curled back to show his razor sharp teeth. Without a second thought, he lunged for her.
She quickly dodged him and attempted to shoot him, but he dodged that in return. His next blow caught her off guard and she stumbled, just barely keeping her balance. He took that opportunity to grab her wrist and he squeezed. Hard. The pressure of his hold forced her to drop her gun. He kicked it away and it fell onto the tracks. He leaned in behind her and grinned from ear to ear.
"Remember me?" He growled.
"Samuel," Layla replied with a frown.
Who the hell was Samuel?
"You smelled so delicious, and you're quite the fighter, I like that. I just knew that I had to have you and so I followed you. I'm gonna have some fun with you and then..."
Samuel put his mouth to her ear and his words were too quiet for me to hear in on his conversation, but the expression on Layla's face told me enough.
"I'm not edible, jagoff." She grimaced.
"Perhaps not a full meal, but maybe a light snack I think," He crooned as he licked his lips.
"No, I mean you literally would regret it," she said. "I'd give you a bad case of indigestion."
"Now that is no way to treat a lady," said a deep, masculine voice from the other end of the station. The voice was cold and menacing.
Samuel moved so he was facing the source of the voice. "What the hell! Who's there? Who are you?"
The voice chuckled. "There's really no need for introductions, and I'd hate to waste time on formalities with filth who's about to die here"
The shadows shifted and a tall shape moved forward into the light. He was a lean man with light blond hair and bright green eyes. He wore black pants and a black long-sleeved shirt. Over that he wore some kind of leather harness that crisscrossed his chest, holding an assortment of blades and other carry-on weapons; he even had a gun strapped to his thigh just like Layla.
"Don't get cocky, you bastard." Samuel spat. "Stay back or I'll rip her apart like cotton candy!" He slid his hand to her throat, his claws dug into her skin while his other hand stayed behind her back.
"Eh, that's a bit melodramatic, don't you think?" The man quipped. He took a step forward, then another.
"Fine." Samuel hissed. "Her death will be on your hands."
Before the man reached them, Samuel brought back his arm and plunged his hand through Layla's back with a sickening sound, crushing bone and ripping past flesh and muscle. I watched in absolute horror as her eyes rolled back in her head and her chest split open. Her body gave one last twitch, and then hung limp.
Samuel retracted his arm and held her steaming, sopping-wet heart in his hand with a smug and hungry look on his face. I clenched my hands into fists, my nails bit into my palms and I felt a sickening drop in my stomach. Damnit, I couldn't do anything but watch.
Samuel casually took a bite out of it, the blood ran freely down his chin. He smiled and dropped the organ on the ground. He tossed her body in our direction like discarded trash; her body slammed into the broken wall we hid behind. Layla's dead-eyed stare made my heart lurch. I felt a scream form in my throat, but Roland quickly clamped a hand over my mouth.
The man in the vest narrowed his eyes.
"Now, it's your turn! Between the both of you I'll have food to last me a week!" He lunged forward, but before he could land a single blow, something jerked Samuel backwards. An ominous miasma permeated the air as a shadow took shape right behind him from the ground. Four unnaturally long pale arms wrapped themselves tightly around him as a slender, naked woman-I think it was a woman-rose from out of the darkness. Her face was blanketed by long strands of black hair.
Suddenly, Samuel released an ear piercing screech that reverberated all around us. Roland and I both plugged our ears and groaned in pain, but I managed to watch as the woman's bony fingers dug into his flesh. He clawed at her desperately, but it was futile. His flesh started to steam as it twisted and withered away. Blood seeped out of every orifice and pooled on the ground beneath them. His scream died and his body went limp. The woman pulled her arms away from him, and his body collapsed.
The creepy, four armed woman disappeared back into the shadows. I blinked. What the fuck was that thing? Holy crap that was scary as hell!
The man grimaced and walked over to the dry husk that used to be Samuel and reached into his pouch. From it he produced a small yellow vial. With a deft motion, he poured the vial's contents over the body and then stepped back. Where the drops had hit his corpse, black smoke began to curl away. The smoke quickly spread horizontally until it cocooned the body entirely. In a few seconds, the smoke dissipated, leaving an innocuous pile of dust behind.
"You two can come out now," The man said. "It's safe. I was sent by my boss, Rhysand Winters."
I perked up at the name. Though I hesitated, thinking that staying hidden was a better option. What if that Grudge-looking thing is still around? I don't want my skin to dry up like a prune! (It's a trap!) Roland placed a hand on my shoulder and gave me a reassuring nod and stood up. "It's fine, Gav. He's telling the truth."
Alright whatever you say. I stood up from our hiding place, but before I could move away from the wall however, I felt something tug at my pant leg. I glanced down and panicked.
"HOLYSHITWHATTHEFUCK!" I babbled almost incoherently.
Layla squeezed my ankle while her other hand came up to her face just in case I decided to kick at her. "Hey! Stop that. Just calm down will you!"
"How the hell am I supposed to calm down, you freaking zombie!" Oh. My. God. Did this mean that zombies exist?
Roland quickly pulled me away from her as she slowly sat upright and groaned. "Ugh...that fucking sucked! That was my favorite sweatshirt, too." She glared up at me. "And I'm not a zombie ok? So relax."
"Oh? So you're finally awake." The man said. He sauntered over and picked something up from the ground and examined it.
"Hey!" Layla snapped at him. "Quit playing with my heart, Oliver! Give it here."
The man, Oliver rolled his eyes and tossed the organ to Layla who caught it, easily. "Be careful you jerk." She unzipped her backpack and took out a jar. She placed her heart into it and placed it back into her bag. She took out a black jacket and put it over her sweatshirt to hide the gaping hole in her chest.
She turned around and stomped over to the pile of dust. "Damnit Oliver, I really wanted to kill him." She pouted. Then she glanced down. "Oh, yeah! My gun," She hopped down to grab her gun off the tracks, as if she hadn't just had her heart ripped out of her chest a moment ago.
"Clearly that wasn't going to happen," Oliver scoffed. "You're welcome by the way."
Layla flipped him the bird as she climbed back onto the platform.
"Ok, seriously what the hell was that?" I exclaimed.
"My job." Oliver stated, simply.
Ok fine. Keep your secrets I thought.
He took something small from his pocket. It was a key similar to Layla's. He placed the key into the keyhole and placed his other hand on the circle and moved it in an 90° angle, and then he pushed in.
For a moment nothing happened. Then something-actually many somethings clicked and slid into place on the other side. The wall in front of us cracked and popped as it began to ripple with bursting light.
"So cool," I breathed.
"Let's go." Oliver said, again. He placed the key back into his pocket, and without another word he stepped through. I watched as the light swirled. Something smelled...good. the three of us stepped through the swirling ominous warmth, leaving the abandoned train station behind.

Alright, a lot of people actually seemed interested in reading my review (thank you guys so much) so i finished it up and am ready to share it to the world. I spent a longgggg time on this, and no, it wasn't for a school project or anything. I just wanted to type this cause I think the album is incredible.
The Review is split into Chapters as well, and i'm back and forth writing from my perspective, and a overall perspective. So it might be a little confusing sometimes, but I hope it is good.
So, with that being said, here is my extensive review of older (with a link to it on a google doc as well because reading on reddit is hard and hurts my eyes). Please let me know what you think and enjoy.

​
Older- Lizzy McAlpine
(a review, critic, and analysis by Bobby HaltmeieCharlie Pearl)
​
(Chapter 1, Prologue)
Older By Lizzy McAlpine (24) released on Friday April 5th 2024 is her 4th studio album, and in my opinion her strongest to date. While I believe that my review of this album is easily my best review to date, I can not stress enough the importance of taking your own time with this piece of art. Lizzy spent over two years writing this album while openly dealing with mental health struggles which resulted in one of the most beautifully written, raw, and true albums I have ever gotten to hear.
Please take your own time with this album, it is what I believe to be one of the greatest pieces of modern music and arguably one of the greatest theatrical, pop, indie, rock, alternative albums of all time. While listening to the opinions of critics is a good way to better understand lyrics and songs, it is still more important and always will be for you to make your own emotional opinions. Music is subjective.
(Chapter 2, a musical analysis)
BRACE FOR IMPACT EVERYONE, alright let's begin… This album may be one of, arguably the greatest albums that I have ever heard. I have been writing album reviews for about 4 years now, and I don't publish them, but this one might make it out there this time.
Okay, let's start with the genuine music aspect of this album, every single track on this album is produced incredibly. Mason Stoops and lizzy (The main producers) are cooking up a masterpiece here, the highs, the lows, THE STRINGS (strings will always have a place for me as a violist), the vocal balance, the drums, the ambience, the piano, the raw guitar, the tone, the voice memo/homemade sounds (on occasion), the bass lines (pay attention to them it's amazing). But this is the best part of the music aspect…
The vocals, Lizzy has undoubtedly one of the most beautiful voices that I have ever heard, her flips to her falsetto, her lows, her vibrato, her perfection of tone and oh my… the double/tripled vocal tracks… I have never in my life heard an artist who has even tried to replicate or compare to lizzys doubled vocal harmonies because she truly perfects it more than any artist in the world. Her voice is beautiful too, the timing of her doubled tracks are insane too, truly emphasizing certain lines of the album (Well get into lyrics i promise).
Alright here are some tracks in no order that are either produced like god himself came down to earth and made music; The Elevator, All Falls Down, Drunk, Running, Broken Glass, March, and Vortex. However It is soooo important to me that I am not taking away from the production of any of these tracks, every track on this album is produced as a 10/10 and perfectly work for the album and the art that lizzy was trying to accomplish.
(Chapter 3, song analysis) (ordered by tracks)
The opening track The Elevator I was by no means prepared for. The track is incredibly quiet to begin, where I almost panicked thinking my headphones aren't plugged in. This is the shortest track on the album as well at barely over 1:30, the lyrics are minimal and short but begin the album with a beautiful tone for what we are in for. The song becomes a larger more theatrical song with the introduction of drums and doubled vocal tracks, before what sounds like the clicking of a gun (I am unsure) before the song turns into a full out instrumental masterpiece before abruptly ending and going into the next track.
Come Down Soon the second track on the album, is definitely one of the more fun songs to listen to. A lot of this album I would not consider “playlist songs” since a lot of them deal with some wild topics that might not be the best for most playlists (depending of course) but it is a cute little love song with minimalistic but perfect instrumentals. A simple guitar stringing pattern with a lot of ambience in the background of the chorus especially. This is also the only track where I am able to hear clear vocals from someone other than Lizzy, there is a male vocal in the background of the bridge/instrumental.
Like It Tends To Do starts with an eerie guitar tone that I am not sure how, but I wish I could replicate. Lizzy's vocals come in and are undoubtedly the forefront of this track, she wants you to pay the most attention to the lyrics, which you subconsciously do because of the minimal backing track. The vocals eventually end, and some ambient noise is brought in, with some simple piano melodies, and beautiful orchestral strings (a highlight of the track for me). The track is one of the quieter on the album, it is peaceful yet uncomfortable, soft yet aggressive, and relatable but hard to listen to.
Movie Star is undoubtedly a call back to Lizzys older music, especially things from her first album Give Me a Minute. The song is only really guitar, there are doubled vocal tracks and harmonies on many emphasized lines, especially when she says “over and over” (a lyric that also appears in the title track older) there are occasional piano keys and some ambience with reverb before abruptly ending.
But I especially feel the need to call out All Falls Down, because this track made me jump with its production at the end, chills. Chills. Chills. Lizzy makes tracks go from quiet and peaceful ballads to incredibly produced full band songs with drums, horns (the sax in some of these songs is actually such a highlight), and layered guitabass/piano parts which add genuine perfection to the album.
Staying is one of the quietest songs at the beginning before the piano begins to come in and introduce a beautiful melody. The first verse sounds almost poetic and doesn't follow clear patterns but it is beautiful. The song introduces one of the most important plot points as well, which we will analyze in more detail in chapter 4. (this song reminds me of Bad Luck -Noah Kahan a lot btw)
I Guess the second single from the album and it will tear you apart if you read these lyrics (I promise the lyric analysis will happen) but this song definitely has one of the largest full band sounding feels, it's got horns, strings, ambience, doubled/tripled vocal tracks, clear drums, catchy melodic vocal lines, and guitar. The song starts as a quiet yet charming ballad to a very quiet muted acoustic guitar, its a personal reflection on Lizzy's whole relationships, her relationship with her lovers, previous lovers, and most prominently, her father. The song was released on march 7th 2024, and it was dedicated to her dads passing (which had happened 4 years to the date before this song was released)
Drunk, Running… alright lizzy this is getting unfairly good. First off, I know I haven't touched on lyrics yet, but I have to talk about some of these. Her imagery??? Dude… it's insane. But this is one of those tracks that starts as a beautiful theatrical song, with incredible lyrics on some really serious topics. The production is insane with how it starts as one of the “voice memo/homemade sounding” songs, but somehow they were able to seamlessly transition the song into another beautiful even more theatrical track with some of the most beautiful melodic line spread throughout the backing track while also keeping many of Lizzy's vocals prominent and clear.
Broken Glass, first off, I am praying that this is not a true story that lizzy has been a victim too. ***If you have had a past with abuse and violence this song is a very serious and intense song about these topics so please proceed with caution and keeping that in mind*** From a musical aspect this song is incredible, I believe there are 2 guitar tracks in the background that bounce from ear to ear (The use of stereo on this album is wild btw) later during the chorus, a piano comes in and it is beautiful. During verse 3 we get some subtle 808’s that are wildly good (Lizzy pls give me lessons) the song then once again turns into another theatrical track with a large, loud ending. With a perfect buildup and it eventually drops back down to being quiet again so smoothly it's amazing. Please spend time with this song and break it down because there is far too much for me to describe in a paragraph.
You Forced Me To. Whoa Lizzy, this is probably the most theatrical song on the album (in a way) . I love the piano lines during the instrumental breaks (so theatery) the guitar is very theatrical and beautiful. The double vocals on this track stand out to me more than most tracks, and it's amazing. The way the song ends with its singular piano line is also perfect.
You Forced Me To transitions straight into the album's title track Older, which was also released as the first single for the album. The piano has a very iconic to lizzy sound where you can hear the pedals be lifted and pressed throughout the song which brings that awesome voice memo sound to it (which everyone loves). The song is one of a few that actually have a repeating chorus that stays the same throughout the track, but I mean, hey at least it is undeniably beautiful and perfect to the point of it being the most viral song off the album (as of 4/5/24).
Better Than This another throwback track that reminisces of her past works, the track is mainly just Lizzy and her guitar which makes it feel raw and draws more attention to the lyrics. The song sounds like a crisis, Lizzy is clearly feeling low at the point of writing this, as the topics and eeriness of the track reflect the self deprecating meaning.
Every album has highlights and lowlights, this album does not have lowlights at all. But to be fair I have a least favorite song (I know I know) and it's going to piss some people off. But I am very confident that this track will grow on me like crazy. March, it's definitely one of the most beautifully written, true, and raw songs on the album. Lizzy kept the tradition of the 2nd to last track being for her dad who passed. The song is so raw and real, you can feel it in her vocals and the repeatedly showing up piano melodies. I know the song will grow on me, but it's one of the less theatrical songs on the album, but still a ten out of ten undoubtedly. The track is obviously mainly lyric focused, which is why I know it is going to grow on me because I have an insane appreciation for lyrics.
The closing track Vortex; a almost 6 minute long track (the longest of the album) is what I would consider a perfect outro to an album I wish never ended. A beautiful piano ballad with occasional additions of accented piano in the background as Lizzy's voice sings a perfect reflection of every track on this album. The bridge of this song may have in fact ruined me and left me genuinely speechless. I don't have any words to describe this so I am just going to leave this line here… “And you're screaming at mе, and I'm watching it fall. And I'm slamming the door and you make yourself tall. But it's always an act and it never lasts long” The song has one of the most beautiful and gradual instrumental lines I have ever heard before becoming the largest and loudest track on the album (maybe All Falls Down tops it) but either way it's perfection that can not be described by words. Listen to the song yourself and realize the beauty of it.
(Chapter 4, lyric breakdown & plot breakdown *Side A*) (ordered by track)
The Elevator: The opening track is actually a reflection of what is about to come with this album “It wasn't slow, it happened fast” foreshadows the haste of the story that is about to follow in this album. The closing verse shows Lizzy in another time, hoping that the new relationship she finds herself in will last “Can we stay like this forever? Can we be here in this room 'til we die? I think we can make it. I hope that I'm right” Lizzy clearly doesn't have the highest hopes for the relationship as the most she can do is “hope that it lasts” this shows how Lizzy may have had a complex past with relationships, resulting in a false sense of hope and trust in this person.
Come Down Soon: The opening line, “He leans out the window. Of the car as it rolls away He says, "Do you come here often?" I have to laugh, 'cause that's so cliché” The imagery of this track definitely adds to the story greatly, this is the main way that lizzy writes so theatrically (her use of imagery). But this line also is in itself cliché, which adds a sense of humor and comfort to the track. “He says, "Do you wanna leave yet?" Only if I leave with him” Lizzy is in love with everyone. She seemingly had just met this person, and she is already hoping to go home with him. “Nothing this good's ever really good for me” is a repeated phrase throughout the chorus. It means that lizzy believes this new person in her life is essentially too good to be true, and that it won't last the same way it is now. The track's title Come Down Soon also shows Lizzy's pessimistic views on this relationship, believing that this will not end well. “Music spills onto the dirt. But we stand here in the freezing cold. And wonder who will kiss who first” once again lizzy uses imagery to show the setting, they are outside in the cold, listening to music with romantic tension. Lizzy and this unnamed person are in a mad state of love (or the honeymoon phase of the relationship) which Lizzy is aware of, and continuously reminds herself that the relationship will likely be downhill from here, or it will “come down soon”.
Like It Tends To Do: Things are beginning to go downhill, yet lizzy will try to hold on and keep hope. But she isn't sure where things are going to go from here, “I don't know where we stand anymore…Don't know why I feel I'm faking something. I don't know what to do with my hands anymore. Feels exactly like it was. But at the same time it feels so different” Lizzy says these lines poetically, and she seems weaker mentally, just a moment ago her and this new person she met were madly in love and it felt like they would never let eachother go. But things are seeming to change. The honeymoon phase is ending, they might still be together, but they aren't connecting the same way “If we were standing in the same room… Would I actively avoid you? Or would everything havе changed. Like it tends to do?” Lizzy once again is being rather pessimistic and struggling to see any good in what is yet to come. She believes that all her relationships in the past and in the future will eventually just fade into nothing “like it tends to do”.
Movie Star: Lizzy is likely being told things to make her feel better about herself in this relationship. Whether these things she is being told are true or not, we don't truly know at this point but we will eventually find out. “I'm special… He chose me out of everyone…[I’m] Famous to someone” Lizzy is enjoying this praise at first, but as we get to the 2nd verse Lizzy begins to catch on to the toxicity she may be falling victim to. “I wanna change, I wanna grow But it's physically impossible… I feel like a movie star, but it's getting old. Being famous for someone” Lizzy starts to feel trapped by this person, feeling “physically impossible to grow” is a metaphor for being trapped in a controlling relationship that is not allowing Lizzy to grow to her fullest potential.
All Falls Down: While this song is so groovy with its amazing sax and horns, with simple jazz style drumming as obe and bass clarinet carry an awesome melody. The song is far deeper than the musical aspect, the lyrics are once again back and forth between lizzy telling herself this relationship is good for her and is going to be good in the end. The track also reflects on Lizzy's personal life outside of this relationship, her struggles with mental health, touring, fame, and success. “More like you today, more than a shell of me… Twenty-three and a sold out show. I am happy, but I'll probably cry after you go home. Doing fine, like I always am. Am I that good of a liar that I believe myself again?” Lizzy is back and forth between feeling good about her life and career, she is selling out shows and having a great time, but she still feels trapped and unable to grow because of this relationship that she is stuck in. “Twenty-two was a panic attack. I can't stop the time from moving and I can never gеt it back” Lizzy is finally admitting that this relationship's benefits are not outweighing the bad, and that she is angry about the fact that she will never be able to get this time back. She expresses that when she was 22 (and in this relationship we can assume) she was at an all time low, having regular panic attacks and just overall mentally unstable.
Staying: This track is the heaviest track so far. Lizzy spirals heavily during this track, and ironically, the title completely contradicts the majority of the lyrics. The song discusses how Lizzy plans on leaving this person, while also still feeling trapped by them and unable to leave “I'm too far gone to care…How can you look so peaceful. When you know I'm gonna leave?” Lizzy claims that she is too far gone to care, she believes that she is so trapped in this relationship that she is numb to anything else that can begin to happen.
I Guess: This being the 2nd single from the album, lizzy obviously wants us to pay attention to it. “I'll tell a lie just to bring you home” This likely means that Lizzy and her partner are in a disagreement, or at the very least Lizzys partner is feeling reluctant to return home with her. Lizzy feels obligated to care for this person still however, even though she knows that they are not good for her, so Lizzy tells a lie in order to fill this “obligation”. “I guess it's all about timing. I guess it's all about the things you want but never get. I guess it's all about trying. To love someone you've never met” Not many tracks from Older contain repeating choruses, but this one is repeating and very beautifully written. Lizzy is still trying to tell herself that in a way, this could still work. She has been hurt, trapped, and unhappy, but she continues to think that there is hope, resulting in her trapping herself in this relationship herself (likely due to manipulation in the relationship) “we're equal, more or less (Mm). Now I am sick, and you're probably drunk” We see clear examples of an unhealthy relationship here. Her partner is drinking while she is sick, yet she still claims that they are equal… or at least more or less. “Wish it was easy, I wish I knew. What I was doing, but I never do. (Here we go)” These are perfected lyrics, they encapsulate the struggles of her mental health, relationship, and so much more. Life is a rollercoaster of unexpected things that are often out of peoples control, the best we can do is guess because nobody will know the correct path for you (because there is none).
(Chapter 5, lyric breakdown & plot breakdown *Side B*) (ordered by track)
Drunk, Running: Drunk running begins the second half of the album, and also notes a pretty noticeable change in mood. Things are beginning to get worse for Lizzy, both mentally and within the relationship itself. “What did you mean when you said that? You were sober now? Caught you in bed with a Red Bull Vodka” Lizzys partner is failing to keep his sobriety, and it is hurting Lizzy. She feels lied to, betrayed, and unimportant. Lizzy wants him to stop drinking for her, yet she he continues to clearly show a lack of care for her by continuing to do so. “No one stops you. Nobody takes it from your hand. Even when you. Break your leg drunk running… Say, "I love you" And then drink it backwards” The line “Say, "I love you" And then drink it backwards” is the closing line of the chorus and the most important to the song. The line means that every time Lizzys partner has a drink, it undoes the good, or undoes the “i love you”. “What if it was all my fault?... Make a person out of memories, they won't live up to it. I'm so sorry I stay when I shouldn't” Lizzy begins to blame herself for the harmful actions of her partner, which is clearly not her fault as relationships are meant to be balanced (which this one is clearly not). “Say, "I love you". And then drink it backwards. Say, "I love you". Uoy еvol I, Uoy evol I” The chorus then repeats again before fading into a beautiful orchestral outro, all while Lizzy is going back and forth between saying “I love you” and “Uoy evol I”, I love you in reverse, which reflects the repeating actions of doing and undoing the love in the relationship.
Broken Glass: *TW, if you have struggled with physical abuse, domestic abuse, self harm, or anything of that nature please proceed with caution. Remember that you are not alone and people are here to help.* This is undoubtedly one of, if not the most lyrically moving and difficult songs to listen to on Older. The song deals with topics of abuse within the relationship, this is obviously the worst point of the relationship yet. It is important to remember that not very long ago this relationship had seemed perfect. “Broken glass on the table. Pick it up, hold it to your throat. I can see who you are now that the windows broke. Drop of blood on the carpet. Didn't think it would go this far. Don't know why I held on this long” The use of the symbol broken glass, shows the weapon that is being used against Lizzy in the relationship. The shard is from a broken window, likely due to Lizzys partner lashing out and eventually breaking the window out of anger. Lizzy is being actively threatened by her partner, there is blood on the floor from cuts inflicted from one another. However any harm that Lizzy had done is simply in self defense, which is confirmed on the pre-chorus “I know you've been hurt. But you did it first to me… Broken glass again” This line shows that any harm or violence done was first done by Lizzys partner (inflicting onto Lizzy) and saying “broken glass again” shows the repetition of this behavior. “Maybe it doesn't matter. Who the blame gets assigned to next. Nothing's ever the way that I remember it” Lizzy is being manipulated into believing that any problems in the relationship are her fault, she is aware that no matter who starts the altercation, the blame will be turned onto her. “And every word is a landmine…It might seem like I love you. But I just don't want to be alone” this line is our first outright confirmation by Lizzy that she is not willingly in this relationship. Everything she is saying is being taken out of context and turned into something larger than it is (a landmine)
You Forced Me To: *TW, if you have been sexually abused or assaulted, this track contains details on those topics and it is important to proceed with caution, people are here for you if you are struggling*Lizzy is being brutally manipulated by this point in the relationship. This “partner” if you can even call him that anymore, is basically molding Lizzy into the version of her that he wants, this may even be happening in a sexually abusive way, as the first line says “You're on top of me. And I’m under you. And it never stops”. This shows fairly clear signs of more physicall and sexual abuse. The chorus shows how brutally Lizzy has been manipulated by this point, she is feeling terrible about herself, and feels that any harm done in the relationship, or even in general, is her fault. “I want you to hate me. I deserve it for my crimes. I know that I loved you. But you loved me harder. Every time. I am not the same as when you met me. I have changed because you forced me to” She continues to blame herself, while still being aware of the controlling nature of the relationship.
Older: The title track… Lizzy begins to branch away finally. Not directly, but she is thinking through things more clearly now. “Over and over, a carousel ride…Sick to my stomach, can't find the ground. Stuck in a loop…” She is reflecting on how terrible the things she was going through were. She also begins to understand that the constant repetition of the terrible things in the relationship were brutal and ruining her life, health, mental health, and more. “Thought it'd be over by now. Thought you would leave. Thought I would come to my senses. Wish I was stronger somehow. Wish it was easy. Somewhere I lost all my senses. I wish I knew. what the end is” Lizzy reflects at herself. She was so young when all of this happened, and she is beginning at least to realize how terrible these things were, however she still is wishing and blaming herself for the harm done to her. “Over and over, watch it all pass. Moms gettin' older, I'm wanting it back. Where no one is dying, and no one is hurt” Lizzy reflects on her childhood, wanting it back. She doesn't want her mother to age more because that scares her, and she doesn't want anyone to be dying (which likely refers to her father) “I wish I knew. what the end is” this is the ending line of the track, and it perfectly encapsulates Lizzy’s feelings. Life is a cycle of good and bad, and we will never know how it ends until we live it.
Better Than This: “There's someone at my door, I can hear him knocking. If I let him inside it will all be true. I didn't know that I was capable of all of this.” It finally sounds like Lizzy is accepting that this person was not good for her, she eventually leaves him, he tries to come back by knocking at her door, but for the first time in the relationship, Lizzy doesn't answer. “What if I'm not a good person? You always say that I am. But you don't really know me at all now. I think that I'm not who you think I am. But I like to be seen and I like to be wanted. Want it to mean something” Lizzy finally stops letting the manipulation get to her, she also contemplates going back, but eventually decides that it would be worse for her. She misses being wanted the way that she was in the relationship, but she doesn't miss the abuse and manipulation. “Someone will love me better than this” Lizzy realizes that she can do better, this relationship is not worth sticking around for anymore. “Someone will love you better” the final line depicts the last sliver of hope and care that Lizzy has for the now ex.
March: This track is likely about Lizzy's father, however there are still many pieces that can be connected back to the relationship this album focuses on. “...Tryna find the lesson in it all, but. I haven't learned anything” as stated in some of the previous songs, Lizzy wishes that she would just know how to live life “correctly”, blaming herself for any mistakes she's made, claiming that she “hasn't learned anything”. “Never looked much like my father” a line dedicated to her father who had passed away due to illness in March of 2020. Lizzy reflects on him in the next lines, but they are also applicable to her now ex. “I see him more now that he's gone. Or maybe I just see him in everything” She can't do simple things anymore, like certain songs might remind her of her ex, or her father. She claims to be seeing them in everything, a metaphor for everything reminding her of them and the times that she would rather forget. “And how could it take so long? Thought I had it handled but it slipped through. I didn't know it'd be this hard. So far away, and then it hits you” Lizzy accepts in part, that there wasn't much she could do. She was young and unknowing. But as she processes, it “hits her” and she begins to understand. “Called you when I heard the news. Spent the night lying next to you. What a way to start it off. So heavy from the start” This line is most certainly for her father. She would spend nights in the same room, comforting her father through his illness. She says how everything has been “heavy from the start” as in, nothing has been easy for her ever. She witnessed her dad pass at a young age, and everything since then has been so complex.
Vortex: This track summarizes so much of the album, “I know it's not my fault. But I can't say that I'm blameless” Lizzy admits to herself at last, it isn't her fault. But, part of her still knows she could have left which leaves her feeling guilty still, which she shouldn't, but she can't stop herself from. “I know it's not my fault. But sometimes it feels like I did this” Lizzy reflects on all the times that she has felt or been blamed for the things done to her, even though it isn't her fault. “Someday I'll be able to let you go… Someday I'll be kinder to myself” Lizzy admits to herself that she needs to be kinder to herself, and care for herself first sometimes, not the lives of others. “We're spinning out of a vortex. I don't remember who we are” Lizzy describes her efforts to forget this time of her life, spiraling repeatedly down a “vortex” and attempting to block out the memories. “And you're screaming at mе and I'm watching it fall. And I'm slamming the door and you make yourself tall. But it's always an act and it never lasts long. 'Cause I always come back when I need a new song. And I'm tired of this and the way that it feels. I'm not there anymore, this has never been real. We're just awful together and awful apart. I don't know what to do anymore” This bridge is the best lyrics on the album. It is a perfect summary of the hell that Lizzy was living through. With beautiful imagery, describing the arguments and fights they would have with perfect accuracy. Saying that he would often make himself tall, a metaphor for him making himself look bigger and scarier to assert a dominant nature. She talks about how it is all fake anyways and that it will go back to “normal” again. She talks about her struggles to leave, saying that she will always come back for something. She says that they are both awful together and apart, which tells us why she would continue to go back to him no matter how toxic he may have been to her. “Oh-oh, oh-oh. Someday I'll be able to let you go. Oh-oh, oh-oh. Someday you'll come back, and I'll say no” Lizzy accepts it at last, with the final line of the album where she confirms that she will never go back to this person again. (lizzy im so proud of you)
(Chapter 6, a brief lyrical review)
The story of Older is undoubtedly beautiful, there are moments that are hard to listen to because of the rawness, there are moments that make you want to get up and dance, there are moments that can make you break down crying, and there are moments that leave you with no words. Older is Lizzys best project to date, she shows signs of both musical growth, and emotional growth. This album encapsulates years of her life in one long story. Dealing with the early stages of a relationship where she is happy, the later stages where things begin to get dry, the lowest point where there are moments of abuse, alcoholism, and depression, to the final track has a long reflection during the bridge where she remembers all of the terrible things that were done to her before finally turning into a freeing moment of growth for Lizzy where she finally lets go, she is ready to move on now and she plans on never going back. (enough to make a grown man cry)
(Chapter 7, concluding thoughts)
Older as I previously stated is Lizzys best album to date. It is a masterpiece of writing, music, production, vocals, and so much more. And as I had mentioned in chapter one, it is so important to spend your own time with this album. While the review is helpful and can help you understand, please take your own time to appreciate the artwork that Lizzy blessed us with. This is a sit down, lyrics out, multi-listen, no distractions album.
(Author Note)
Hiiiii, if you read the whole thing, first off, thank you so so so much. This took a long time to write but I am so proud of how it came out. This is the best piece of writing I have done in years (maybe my life) and I am so glad that I get to share it with people in the world. If you think it's good, please share this around with your friends, family, and other Lizzy fans and let me know what you think. I've been writing my own music for a longtime now and this album definitely has inspired me so if you really want to be super cool, please feel free to follow my instagram @: charlies.pearly. (Charlie Pearl, Aka me :)) Thank you for reading and have a amazing day. I love you all and you are so important to the world <3

• Bobby Haltmeier AKA Charlie Pearl

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MAUGA
-I can't think of Mauga in a "good guy" skin. It would REALLY surprise me if he got a skin this season just because of how recently we've been told of his lore. But, if we did, I would probably see him in armour like Reinhardt's "Lieutenant Wilheim" skin.
ANA
-Captain Amari skin but with signature Black and Red colours. Take her blue beret, and replace it with Moira's Blackwatch Beret (add a Talon logo). She's older here, but she doesn't hide her identity with a hood. You really want to provoke a feeling of evil leadership with this skin.
ASHE
-In this universe, we can either presume she never formed the deadlock gang at all, or she was the one captured instead of Cassidy when Overwatch conducted their sting operation. the latter seems more interesting, so we can maybe see a Blackwatch-style/Overwatch trainee Ashe skin. I picture this skin without her hat. IDK why, she just seems less evil without her hat, like underneath her hat, she's still just a girl with parental troubles who went down a bad path. Her hat symbolizes her putting on a tough persona.
BAPTISTE
-Bap already has a Talon skin, so maybe you can make him older? Give him some "Evil but still Charismatic " voice lines and you're good to go
BASTION
-Bastion already has some "Evil" skins like Gwinshin, Stealth, and Omnic Crisis, so I don't expect anything this season. But, it'd make it black and red and add some Talon logos.
BRIGITTE
-This skin would be similar to her "Royal Captain" skin from Starwatch, but add some of that "Talon flair" with red, black and white colours. Her personality would have to be changed to a child raised under a Talon operative their whole life (Torb). She's more cold and calculating. Think of "Evil Riot Police Officer meets Mechanic".
CASSIDY
-Cassidy has 2 options here. Either, he becomes the leader of the deadlock gang after Ashe is captured, or he joins Talon. Since he's more closely intertwined with Overwatch, a Talon skin would make more sense. I'm thinking you take his Blackwatch skin and change it from a "young criminal who doesn't want to be here" to "Evil Clint Eastwood". He's more disciplined but still has that cowboy flair.
Maybe give him some robo-eyes. Robo-eyes are always cool.
D.VA
-Make her mech REALLY Talon-y. put spikes on it, tint the windows, and make it look threatening. As for D.va herself, she's more of a soldier than a gamer. She's less childish because she's seen what Talon is capable of. Or she's still childish, but she's totally chill with the blatant murder and evil Talon stuff. Either one works if you execute it right.
DOOMFIST
-how do you make the leader of the baddies the leader of the goodies? basically make him a young Soldier: 76. The skin's full of bright Overwatch-y colours (Blue, White Yellow), and the mood of the skin is definitely more positive. I picture it as a "Military Formal " mood since Doomfist is a rich boi because of that handy prosthetic technology company, but also the leader of the world's revered peace organization. "Only through peace do we evolve" type mood.
ECHO
-She's a literal gun with wings. GLaDOS-type personality. Camo-skin but make it dark and red.
GENJI
-Genji actually has 2 interesting options here. The first is obvious, it's Talon Genji. In this universe, they rescued Genji from certain death, and he gained a deep hatred for his brother. But instead of Blackwatch Genji, which gives off "Cool but Edgy Teenager" vibes, this skin really emphasizes the fact that this boi is HATRED INCARNATE. This "Hardened Assasin" look is due to Genji having no positive influences to keep him from totally falling into his anger. No Zenyatta to give him peace, no good versions of Cassidy or Mercy to give him light in the darkness, no forgiveness for his brother. Unlike Blackwatch, which limits just how evil he could be, Talon lets him go completely off the deep end and become the world's best ninja assassin. Fueled by issues with his bro who tried to kill him. His next option is a bit more obscure. This universe severely wounds Hanzo instead of Genji, leading Hanzo to become the cyborg archer, and Genji could flee in despair, or, (more interestingly in my opinion) he becomes the leader of the Shimada clan and avenges his father by taking down the Hashimoto that assassinated him. This skin would give him skin similar to Hanzo's "Scion" skin, giving Genji a drippy suit. Personally, the first option is way cooler, but Genji would get a drippy suit in the other option, so it's a win-win either way.
HANZO
-As mentioned previously, a cyborg Hanzo archer skin is always an option, different from his Cyberninja skin by overhauling the whole cyborg aspect (Give him a Robo-mask) But more realistically, a Talon skin would look really cool. I'm picturing the colour scheme of his Kabuki skin, with technological elements, kind of like evil Hawkeye? His bow is more of a gun that shoots arrows than a traditional bow if that makes sense.
ILLARI
-we have like, no lore for Illari, so I won't expect a skin for such a lore-inspired season. Maybe like, regular Peruvian citizen Illari. In this universe, she never became a warrior, and the skin is literally just casual clothes. it's like you just took Illari while she was at McDonald's and placed her on a battlefield. Nothing special, but that's what makes it special you know? LOL idk let's move on.
JUNKER QUEEN
-it'd be really hard to make a Junker Queen skin that didn't feel like Junker Queen. maybe make a "wasteland" skin. She never became queen, she just survived in the radioactive outback. I'm picturing Borderlands vibes from this, like Ana's Wasteland skin. JUNKRAT -hear me out: Junkrat becomes king. He beats Simon Cowell in the arena. This Junkrat is like his King Jamison skin, but it's more formal. This Junkrat is more like Junker Queen. Crazy but tactical.
KIRIKO
-Kiriko's lore is so new that we don't have a lot of options, but we have two good ones. First, she joins the Hashimoto. Mobster Queen Kiriko. It's like Hanzo's Scion skin but for Kiriko. I find this idea pretty cool tbh. The second ties in with Genji's second option. Genji becomes the leader of the Shimada, and Kiriko never has to rebel against the Hashimoto, so she becomes an agent for the Shimada clan. This one is like mobster Kiriko, but more formal, tying into the feel of the Shimdas having a more formal feel than the Hashimoto's rough, gang-like attitude. It's a clan versus a gang-type feel if you know what I mean.
LIFEWEAVER
-Make him a Vishkar Architech. Plain and simple. Give him Sym's default skin.
LUCIO
-Lucio battled against Vishkar, so give make skin hard-light/Vishkar-themed? That's Lucio's only real "enemy" except for Null Sector. The other option is to make his skin out of Spotify ads. That's Lucio's true enemy. He can't afford Spotify premium so in this universe he doesn't take a break from the ads and just becomes PLASTERED with them. a living billboard if you will.
MEI
-Talon Mei is something I can't really picture, but it's definitely possible! She already has an "Evil" skin in the form of Cursed Seer, and it looks pretty alright. I would take that and give it black, red and white colours, like usual. Maybe change her personality to be like, what the playerbase has seen her all these years. Really make her an Ice Queen demon assassin. Make the voice lines savage. Cute/Evil incarnate feel y'know?
MERCY
-I mean, we've already seen it in the trailer. It looks sick. Her personality sounds more like Moira's, which makes sense. Not much to say, looks good.
MOIRA
-Make her like Mercy, except Irish. Her arm probably won't look like she melted it in a microwave if you want it to feel more positive, so it'll probably be more of an arm gadget, like her OV1 default. Her experiments would have to be more humane now, so let's say she performs "life-changing miracles"
ORISA
-TALON ORISA WOOOOOOOOO MAKE HER INTO A BLACK AND RED TANK OF DESTRUCTIONNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!! In all seriousness, this is pretty easy to pull off. Give it Talon colours, and make a big frickin robot. Simple.
PHARAH
-as a child raised under Talon like Brig, she's going to be very soldier-like. Following orders, cold shoulders, you get the idea. the skin is like an enemy commander who is about to fly a mech suit. Disciplined, ruthless, powerful.
RAMATTRA
-Make him Zen. It's basically his travelling monk skin, so if he actually got a skin, it'd be pretty hard to make it different from that.
REAPER
-Reaper and Soldier: 76 are basically polar opposites, so their mirrored universe skins are going to be very similar in feel to the other's original default. Grab Soldier's Strike Commander Morrison skin, and combine it with Reaper's Soldier: 24 skin. simple, effective.
REINHARDT
-Think of his Lieutenant Wilhelm skin, dark mode it, and replace the Overwatch logo with the Talon logo. I imagine his hair to be shorter, more soldier-like, and if he has a helmet, just think of a cool, medieval knight meets futuristic evil organization-type helm. His personality has not learned politeness, he's quick to anger and bad-tempered. Everything Baldreich wouldn't have wanted him to be.
ROADHOG
-THE CO-KING OF JUNKERTOWNNNNN has the same vibes as King Junkrat. SIGMA -Woah, a version of Sigma that hasn't gone crazy? Cool! Take his scientist-like appearance from his origin story and fit him for the field of battle with Overwatch, kind of like Moira's Scientist skin. His personality is dignified, scientific, and not crazy.
SOJOURN
-She's been Talon-fied. add some red to her vigilante skin, change the helmet, or remove it, and make her similar to Ana with that "Evil leadership" vibe. Personality? Remove her charm and make her cold and calculating, or make her charm more evil.
SOLDIER: 76
-make him reaper, just less edgy. He's bitter about losing his title of Commander of Overwatch to Gabriel, but he isn't about to cosplay as the personification of death. He's almost exactly like Blackwatch Reaper, and maybe evil Mercy ran some experiments on him. Yada Yada, he's evil, you get the idea. Also, maybe give him his visor back. Masks make anyone look a little more evil.
SOMBRA:
-Think of Sombra, but give her Tracer's good morals. Now you have Overwatch Sombra. Actually positive, cracks jokes, the skin is positive and colourful.
SYMETTRA
-Make her Lifeweaver. plain and simple. She saw how messed up Vishkar was and dipped.
TORBJORN
-Evil, mad scientist mechanic. he's got those welding goggles every crazy scientist has, and he's ready for some chaos. Skin is like Dr Junkenstein but he's in an auto body shop that fixes evil tanks. And he's a dwarf.
TRACER
-ok, this one would be pretty hype. We're so used to Tracer's upbeat personality, so if we saw her giving everybody the cold shoulder and acting more like Widow, that huge contrast would be SO COOL. Her skin is more white than the other, usually black Talon skins. IDK why, but white as the main colour just fits here. Also, red-tinted visor.
WIDOWMAKER
-It's Amélie Lacroix, before she turned into a sleeper agent. except this time, she chose to join Overwatch to fight Talon after her husband was assassinated. Her skin isn't purple, she's got navy blue, Overwatch fatigues and a traditional sniper rifle.
WINSTON
-Winton is still bitter that his favourite scientist namesake got killed by the other apes on Horizon Lunar Colony. So, he joins Talon because why not, he's angry. I'm thinking the same vibes that his Gargoyle skin gives off, with the technology shown in his Frogston skin. Winton is just an angry gorilla. he's not one for jokes much. Or maybe he does make jokes, just really morbid ones.
WRECKING BALL
-I really don't know guys. He's a hamster. The best I can do is give him the same thing I recommended for Junker Queen. Wasteland skin vibes. He never won in the arena, he never becomes the champ, he just survives in the wasteland.
ZARYA
-Talon Zarya is actually a really cool concept. I'm thinking evil Mercy gave her some experiments, and her skin is pale. Her outfit is black and white mainly, with red tones. And it's got spikes. I don't know where, but it's got spikes. Her personality is just "Big scary Russian lady will smash you to bits if you don't complete the mission"
ZENYATTA
-Make him Ram. The leader of Null Sector has never been more chill. I'm thinking Null Sector colours, give him a cape of some sort like what Ram has, and replace his balls with skulls. I saw that last idea on Reddit one day, and it's too cool to not mention it. I'm just thinking of how his voice lines are chill, but like, roast people in the process.
​
Thank you SO MUCH for reading this absolute article that I just wrote. I know the season is only like 11 days away and skins take a long time to make, but I just wanted to share my thoughts. To be completely honest, just look up "Talon ___________ skin" with any hero in the blank and you'll get some amazing fanart. This community is so great, and I'm glad that Blizzard is experimenting with ideas like this "Mirrored Universe" season.

The results are in for Match 8. The winner is...
The Asura stood at the epicenter of a massive whirlpool, laughing with the cave around him. “Color me impressed!” One of his hands stopped working on a statue of himself long enough to drag a wave of rock over his head, stopping an incoming lightning strike. “I didn’t believe you’d last this long!” The whirlpool ebbed while the bird flew overhead, and the Asura raised both of its hands, raising pointed walls around his person to weaken the whirlpool, should it return.
His four arms battered the rolling waters, and corralled them at his feet, giving his master time to live as the Asura stood knee-deep in mud. “In the centuries I’ve spent defending this place, I have met none who have ever come this close.” Mallory’s head peaked over the rolling rocky waves. “Rejoice in the knowledge that you were strong.”
Mallory launched from atop the waves, heading straight for the Asura. “Oh? Are you looking to join those in the mausoleum so early?” The Asura’s spare hands let their fingers dance, popping stalagmites to block the incoming human jet as it barreled towards him.
Mallory, with his fist pulled back and mouth wide open under Lonely Hours’ faceplate, let out a distinctive, hellish cry. “Rrraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa~aaagh–!”
It would certainly be one to remember.
The Asura raised all six of his hands, and pressed their fingertips together. “Well spoken!” The Asura pulled its hands back. “In exchange, I will show you my final technique! The Harm of Coming Into Being: The Hall of Dreams’ Great Maus-” Blue refuse spurted from the Asura’s mouth.

Haunting Wisps, with a score of 69 to Spanda’s 68!

Category	Winner	Point Totals	Comments
Popularity	Haunting Wisps	18 (8+2) - 12 (5+2)	The players maintained an early lead and held on to it till the end, despite Spanda creeping up there towards the end.
Quality	Spanda	21 (7 7 7) - 23 (8 8 7)	Reasoning
JoJolity	Spanda	20 (7 7 6) - 23 (8 8 7)	Reasoning
Conduct	Tie	10-10	Nothing to report!

The Asura pulled its hands back, revealing the empty space where its stomach used to be. Its head turned towards where its master once sat, beneath a lightning cloud and a circling bird. Mallory’s fist landed, evaporating what was left of the upper body. Lake’s fists passed through the already dissolving legs, which she accentuated with, “Hora, hora, hora!~ Dieeeee!~”
As the waves and moving rocks subsided, Gugulethu joined Mallory among the ashes of their former aggressor. Lake’s voice broke the silence. ”Hey, Malloryyyy, that was kinda like a lich or something, huh?”
Mallory nearly recoiled at that. Nearly. ”No, it was a guy with his own whole complicated deal…”.
”Whatever it was, I don’t care so long as I get paid. I better get good money for all this trouble, too…” Gugulethu grumbles as she kicks the dissolving ash pile.
The armor around Mallory’s body disassembles into three futuristic jets that circle him a few times before vanishing, leaving him with a raised eyebrow, and leaning on his crutch for support. ”You get paid, huh…” Mallory shuffled about to face Gugulethu. “Must be nice…”
Gugulethu’s eyes bored into Mallory’s. “You’re not getting a fucking cent.”
Mallory shrugged with his free arm. “I wasn’t asking.”
Gugulethu nodded. “Good.” She turned on her heels. “Glad we’re clear.” And so, with squabbles by the invaders over how to divide the spoils thankfully averted, the Invasion comes to an end. Time’s ravages, in the form of two unwitting agents, have finally caught up with the last denizen hiding under the mountain, the dignified last bastion of his way of life, the sniveling, cowardly murderer of the weak.
Not that Mallory cares, because he comes to a realization. “Oh, right, the Lyre…” Lake appeared next to Mallory. “D’you remember what room it’s in?”
“You ate the toast with the picture on it, but…” Lake wagged a finger in Mallory’s direction. “Didn’t you say it wasn’t in this room?”
Mallory’s heart sank. “Right.” With his crutch digging into the loam, Mallory turned for any available exit. “We can’t ask these people, either…”
“We’ll just have to punch straight through the mountain until we find it!” Lake put a fist in the air, in an attempt to raise Mallory’s spirits. The darkening clouds over his eyes told a very different story.

If ancient architecture isn’t to your liking, how about a 2v2 in a facsimile of ｢Times Square｣!

Scenario: Wonderland Falling Tomorrow, ??? — 5:00PM
Tick... Tock... Tick... Tock...
The walls of the room were lined with them, filled to the brim with various grandfather clocks. It was difficult to hear your own thoughts in a room like this, where the monotonous ticking made for such an easy distraction to sink into. It was easy to space out, to lose focus, or just to stress and panic - this was a room seemingly designed to make thinking difficult.
Chandra figured that was the case intentionally. She had been told beforehand this was the ‘meeting room’. The bright swirly wallpaper was a little nauseating to look at, so she’d taken to staring at her nails for the past few minutes. They weren’t that interesting. The folks she’d so diligently seeked out a meeting with didn’t seem to have much respect for her time. She’d been sitting in the old ornate wooden chair haphazardly placed in the room’s center so long her butt was starting to get sore.
Tick... Tock... Tick... Tock...
Poof!
“Terribly sorry for the wait, dearie! You know how it is sometimes!” Carolong Hellwalker, second in command at VULTURE, appeared in the blink of an eye, sitting across from Chandra. She’d noted their ability to teleport in and out of... Wherever the hell they even were at a moment’s notice, leaving her on her lonesome. It was an intimidating ability, and even more intimidating was the fact that she’d felt a recent desire to take up juggling. That was new.
“Thanks for showing up.” Chandra sighed. “What’s with the clocks?”
“No clue! They were there when I got here.” Carolong chuckled, leaning their head on a gloved hand. “I’m sorry for all the hassle. But here, within my Stand, was the only place our dear boss was willing to meet you. Precautions, and all.”
“Uh huh.” Chandra nodded. Being inside someone’s Stand was certainly an incentive to be on her best behavior... Not that she had any inclination to give a damn if worst came to worst. “And where is your fearless leader? I’ve been looking for her for a week. Least she could do is show up-”
Susie Eve Black poked her head out from behind Carolong’s obnoxiously tall chair—or maybe she was just short. “S-Sue me for being intimidated.” The shorter girl pointed at Chandra’s guns, kept at her side. “N-N-Not everybody likes to c-carry those things around.”
“They’re my insurance. Gotta have that, yeah?”
“...”
The two women were locked into a stare down, and almost instantly interrupted by Carolong clapping their hands together.
“Alright, then!” They reclined, tilting their chin to look down on Chandra. “I do believe you had something you wanted to discuss with her, yes? Let’s not get in a fight before we’ve even started conversating.”
“Sure.” Chandra sighed. “I’ll get straight to it.” She cleared her throat, fingers tapping on the wooden armrests. “I’d like to be friends.”
A thick, palpable silence filled the room.
“Ah?” Susie tilted her head to the side. “F-Friends?”
Chandra nodded.
Even now, she wasn’t entirely sure she wanted to go through with this. She didn’t exactly have the best relationship with VULTURE, both due to her history with the organization’s leader and the fact that she had kind of sort of killed a lot of their people. Still, the reward for trying was too much to look away from.
The benefits were twofold. According to Amelia, Rasna Kaliya knew a thing or two about the Metropolis Suite, including the fact that that’s who they were being blackmailed into working for. The opportunity to get close to the woman meant she’d have a chance to acquire a ton of information. Not to mention she and VULTURE seemed to have a shared goal of trying to make Bedtown less of a shithole—it wouldn’t hurt to have a big group like this backing her up.
With the change in leadership, she could stomach it far easier than teaming up with the Lammergeier herself. That was what Chandra had told herself over and over. It hardly made it feel less weird, but if she was already here...Might as well go all in.
“I’ll be blunt. I don’t like you guys very much. And you probably don’t like my people very much, either.” She leaned forward, staring Susie down. “But as I’m sure you’re aware, we’ve got a hell of a common enemy. And trying to beat the shit out of each other isn’t gonna do much for taking care of it. You wanna take on the Metropolis Suite...” She grinned. “I’ve got a little insider intel.”
“What is it?” Susie was completely invested in her speech now, wide eyed and eager.
“...” Chandra sighed, leaning back. “Not telling.”
“Aw.”
“Not until we sort out an agreement. I ain’t giving anything out for free. You want me to work for you, you gotta work for me, too. I’m proposing an alliance. My guys’ll help out your guys. We don’t have much numbers, but we’ve got the raw strength...” She paused. Moony would probably be mad... Eh, they could sort it out later. “And we’ve got a food truck. Free meals.”
Both Carolong and Susie seemed to be a lot more interested in that.
“I d-dunno...” Susie leaned on the chair’s armrest. She really was short. “I-I don’t wanna just lend a hand to anybody... W-W-We don’t know if the s-situation down at the old factory was a f-fluke... Or if w-we should forgive you for it. W-Wasn’t cool, y’know.”
“If it’s any consolation, it wasn't like I wanted to.” Chandra didn’t think the ‘I got blackmailed’ route would work, and judging by the looks on their faces, it wasn’t. “Alright, fine. How about I even things up? Clear the air. I’ll do some work for you, free of charge, and we’ll call it even and look into buddying up. That sound any better?”
Susie and Carolong exchanged a glance with each other.
“W-Well, there is one thing, but...” Susie tapped her fingers together.
“You really want to hand that off?” Carolong smirked. “I thought you wanted to deal with it yourself?”
“I’ve got a lot I w-want to deal with m-m-myself!” Susie flung her arms into the air. “D-Do you know how hard it is to be a g-gang leader! Th-There’s just too m-much shhhit to d-d-do! Ugh!”
“So be it, then.” Carolong looked Chandra over a few times, and nodded. “She’s not exactly the most delicate touch, but I bet she’ll do fine. Who knows! This sort of thing could be good for a type like her!”
Chandra chose not to speak up about whatever the hell that meant.
“A-Alright.” VULTURE’s leader stepped forward, clasping her hands together. “S-So here’s the situation. W-We... Have a bit of a m-major issue happening right now. Th-There’s a bunch of members l-looking to, uh, take over the wh-whole gang. N-N-Not what Miss Rasna w-would’ve wanted at all... If y-you could, uh, go into where th-they’re hiding out and s-subdue their boss to g-get em all to calm down, that’d be s-s-s-super nice.”
“...So, go into their base and gun everybody down, pretty much.” Chandra nodded. “Awfully famili-”
“NO! N-N-NO KILLING!!!” Susie was right in front of her all the sudden, nearly making Chandra jump out of her seat. Carolong giggled behind her. “I-It’d be in, uhm, p-poor taste. Especially w-with who their leader is...”
“Huh?” Chandra raised an eyebrow. “...Who the hell’s their leader, then?”
Susie looked away. “Y-You might not believe this, but... Their leader is-”
Scenario: Bedtown — 5:27PM
Even if he wasn’t physically far from home, Vasil was quite aways from Vasitanagarh.
Several of the arts students were able to attend and board at Earthgang’s College of the Arts thanks to scholarships, so Vasil was kept decently informed of the goings-on in that region—more by coincidence than by will. He preferred to steer clear of the bad part of town, especially given the incident a few months ago. Who wanted to risk life and limb over there?
Evidently, he did. There were whispers of the Mark, their mark, graffitied on the various walls and alleys in Bedtown. Thus, he walked the dilapidated streets, head on a swivel and hands firmly in his pockets. “Don’t bother anyone and they won’t bother you.”
Indeed, Vasil was preoccupied with getting to the bottom of who was spreading this mark—the movement, the signature was decentralized, but he still would put forth a vision of what it meant to them, the college, the audience, the public at large. It was bad enough that the Lunar Moth kool-aid drinkers had incorporated it into their cult propaganda; he wouldn’t let it spiral further out of control.
In the distance, he saw a warehouse marked up with colorful paints and among them a green eye formed of interlocking flowers and hands—he recognized the memetic symbol from his own work with a bemused grin and headed towards the building.
He pressed up against the wall, trying to hide himself from whoever may be milling around inside, his ear pressed up against the metal to listen for loiterers. Hearing nothing, ｢Kaycee Sharp｣ molded and hardened from spiritual clay, pressing its blade into the wall and making the chunk of paneling fall forth, leaving a hole wide enough for him to crawl through.
Even in the dark, once he scrambled to his feet, he could see that the inside of the warehouse was as decorated as the exterior, arguably more so. It was no Sistine Chapel of course, as it was tagged by countless artists, their signatures and iconography blotting each other out—indeed the two blended together and collided all over the walls and the ceiling. It was maximalist for his tastes, but— “What are you doing here.”
To his right, slumped in a throne made of pallets and crates was a woman, no older than him. The bags under her eyes and the grime caked onto her clothes said she must have been here—maybe even in that very seat—for days. He’d overheard some conversation on campus, resigned gossip about how a friend stopped going to school following the death of her mother. Who could blame her, given how it had spread over social media? “...You’re Aco’s kid, right?”
“Texas,” she spat back, recoiling at the familial moniker. A massive arm creaked out from beneath an oversized suit jacket, insectoid in nature, hardly looking to be under her control. “Bet a preppy asshole like you saw pictures all over the news.”
“I’m…sorry for what happened,” Vasil began, holding his tongue at the insult but ultimately deciding to let it slide. He was trespassing after all. “Look, I just saw that Mark and got curious. I just wanted to ask a few questions about it, and I’ll be out of your hair.”
“Heh, just a curious tourist who took a wrong turn. You better watch out, or the Middleman will get ya.”
“I’ll keep that in mind on my way back to Earthgang. Trust me, you won’t see me again—”
A loud THUD! echoed through the warehouse as Texas slammed that bizarre arm against the armrest and pushed herself to her feet. She marched towards Vasil, ｢Kaycee Sharp｣ manifesting to point its blade at her, but she continued, shoving her face into his and her furious gaze boring into her.
That she didn’t respond to the Stand wasn’t surprising; her Stand likely hadn’t come to full fruition, but before Vasil could comment, Texas swept her arm towards the rest of the warehouse, other previously unaware youths done up in less-than-great clown makeup who had turned to see the commotion. “Yeah, sure, get your fancy interview so you can write the next great Rākinnagarh novel or what the fuck ever. Whatever lines your pocket or helps you sleep at night. If you didn’t come here to lend a hand, then get the fuck out.” She smirked, no happiness or humor on her face as her normal hand grabbed Vasil’s shirt collar. “We’re all doing fucking miserably. Don’t need some preppy little bitch-boy who can’t be bothered to help out pestering everyone. You get that?”
“Yes, I apologize for not donating all I own to VULTURE so you can continue to tear each other apart,” Vasil hissed, simply stepping around Texas Aco as ｢Kaycee Sharp｣ flaked into non-existence. Her hand was too weak to keep a hold on him. She didn’t seem like she’d been eating well. “With all due respect, I’m a sculptor, not a miracle worker.”
Texas snorted. “Excuses.”
“So what’s your excuse, then?” She wheeled around.
Vasil continued. “You’ve been sitting on that mess, wallowing in filth and self-pity for god knows how long, and you lash out at, what, a ‘tourist’? Some fearless leader you are.” Vasil scoffed, but his tone softened as his brow furrowed in thought. “I’m an artist—change the environment, change how people think, change how people act. Don’t yell at me for a lack of will or for a lack of resources that you yourself also lack.”
The two continued to glare at each other when the sound of gunfire ripped through the air.
The errant loiterers ducked and scrambled for cover as the sounds of footsteps and shouts began to rumble through the warehouse walls. Vasil lowered the hands that had instinctively gone up to protect himself, ｢Kaycee Sharp｣ brandishing its sword and shield to protect its user. “What the hell was that.”
Texas simply laughed darkly at him for flinching—whether her ease was because she had become accustomed to the urban warfare or simply numb to it was unclear. “Like you said. We’re VULTURE and we’re tearing ourselves apart. Bunch of them came to squash our little rebellion, so the last bird standing, no matter how bloodied, wins.”
Vasil opened his mouth to say something but huffed, returning from where he came. “Good luck with that then.”
“Oh?” Texas cocked her head towards him, the frayed disdain replaced with feigned, mocking innocence. “You think you can just go? They’re gonna think you’re trying to escape and deal with you if you leave. You’re fucked if you don’t stay and help.”
Vasil stopped in his tracks, feeling frustration welling up within him. Yet, after clenching his eyes and fists shut, he exhaled and dropped them. He surveyed the warehouse and its inhabitants, nodding as he studied its layout, its composition. Cement, wood, aerosol acrylic paint, steel—the purpose may have been different but structure was structure. The larger a work of art, the more know-how needed to keep it standing. “How many.”
“Huh?”
“Texas, how many people do you have under you?”
“…a few here, a bunch elsewhere. Why?”
“I told you.” He pointed to a few ducking beneath a window, trying to make themselves unseen to those outside. “You three, grab that toolbox and barricade that window. Rest of you follow suit and secure the perimeter.” They continued to look at him, confused and distrustful. Vasil tch’d and addressed her again, more forcefully. “This is about resources, Texas, and only a poor artist blames his tools. Do you want to survive this or not.”
Texas blinked, stunned that her ploy worked before turning to the rest of her faction. “You heard bitch-boy! Move it!”
At her word, the VULTURE rebels heeded his orders, to Vasil’s chagrin. He was not one to micromanage to this degree, but if he was to escape, he would have to get his hands dirty. Texas placed a hand on his shoulder, that same raspy, inscrutable chuckle passing by her lips:
“Alright then, sculptor. Make us a miracle.”
Location: A VULTURE warehouse, hurriedly retrofitted for defense. The map is 20x25 squares, with each square being 2x2 meters. Each player (marked in a circle of their teams’ color) has eight goons (marked with diamonds). Texas Aco (the green square) is in the back basement room, hiding from the fight.
The room is a mess, with shipping containers (green, blue, red) stacked on top of each other, and wooden pallets (tan) spread around the room. The wooden pallets are stacked vertically to around 2m, and the shipping containers are each 2.5m tall. The shipping containers’ metal is highly durable, able to hold up to Chandra’s enhanced gunfire for a second or two before failing, and needing a somewhat large explosive to punch through them.
The green containers are filled with junk; furniture, bags of rice and wheat, and other basic household goods; they don’t stand up to damage well except en masse. The blue containers are half-filled with these; they’re generally used as crash pads and hoards by the people here. The top containers are mostly empty. None of the containers are closed and the locks are mysteriously filed off; they can be opened and closed easily.
Goal: The goal for Vasil Grace is to protect Texas Aco from being captured by Chandra, while Chandra Kaur is seeking to capture the girl. There are a few major ‘win conditions’ for the match on each side.
Chandra has to physically capture Texas. While Texas is doing badly, she isn’t trivial to capture; Chandra must get either three of her goons or herself into the room alone, in which case she takes Texas hostage and wins the match.
Vasil’s win conditions are more flexible. First, he wins if he is able to RETIRE Chandra. Second, he can outlast the faith of Chandra’s goons in the mission, having them call it off and forcing Chandra to retreat.
At base, the match has an effective ‘timer’ of five minutes. Each time one of Vasil’s goons are RETIRED, a minute is effectively ‘added’ as success bolsters Chandra’s goons. Each time one of Chandra’s goons are RETIRED, a minute is effectively ‘subtracted’.
If Chandra carelessly sends her goons into a trap she could be almost instantly RETIRED. If she wastes time, she could be ground down and lose while losing only a few fighters. However, if Vasil can’t use his defensive advantage and Chandra starts winning, she can take her time picking off his goons and leaving him against her army alone.
Additional Information:
Chandra’s goons each have 332 physicals, with Experienced Ruffian: 3 and Robbery: 2. Experienced Ruffian is a generalized combat skill, with them skilled in both melee weapons and, secondarily, gun use. Their skill with guns is notably shakier, needing time to aim if they want to hit and not having ideal accuracy. Robbery gives them skill in breaking down barricades, getting around defenses, and basic traversal ability.
Vasil’s goons each have 224 physicals, with Experienced Ruffian: 3 and Sentry: 3. Experienced Ruffian functions exactly the same as with Chandra’s goons. Sentry gives them a notable tactical advantage in setting up ambushes and spotting (and reacting to) threats like gunfire or bombs. Additionally, despite their lower Agility, they can easily hop up or down from crates.
Each goon is armed with a basic blunt weapon (cricket bat, crowbar, etc) and a knife. Four goons on each side of their commanders’ choice begin with a 9mm handgun with a few extra clips of ammo.
Vasil has two minutes to functionally set up ‘before’ the match starts, and he alone may move around or set up the stage; his goons will hold position until first contact.

Team	Combatant	JoJolity
Lotus Street Manifold	Vasil Grace	“Ha ha ha ha! With your leg broken... How will you be able to dodge these missiles!?” No matter what situation you find yourself stuck in, you’re an artist first and foremost! Even as you exercise your usual technique and control, demonstrate bombast, maximalism, and style!
Cause for Concern	Chandra Kaur	“What? They even have assault helicopters?” This isn’t your first job like this, and the worst way for these jobs to fall apart is getting everyone in the city in on it. Be a professional, and even as you wreak havoc, show your experience, control, and razor-honed skills.

Link to Official Player Spreadsheet
Link to Match Schedule
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Night had fallen on Mount Parapollah. There were almost no lights on in Hāvā’s camp, which let the darkness pour over the clearing. Clouds hung high in the sky, blocking even the light of the moon.
Something big stirred in this darkness. It took plodding, pained steps forward. Every new step struck a chord in the cold, damp evening air, waking the little creatures that called the mountaintop their home.
A passing yellow firefly illuminated the creature’s smiling jaw. It had taken some heavy hits, judging by the bandages across the left side of its head, but that glistening smile tore through the night air.
One by one, the little light bugs bounced between shrubs around the man, illuminating his rather shabby attire. He was covered in dirt, as though someone had used him as a knee board to ride down Mount Parapollah.
Vira rested a hand on the fence outside of Hāvā’s domain. “Hāvā.” His smile grew broad. “How good to see you again!” Vira giggled to himself, letting it reverberate in the night air. He hopped the fence, and his feet made no noise as he touched down on its opposite side. “We have much to discuss…”

"Yeeep, that should do it." Wade said to himself as he broke off another chunk of magnesium as he put it carefully into his mining cart, then holstered his laser behind him before taking position at the back of the cart. Today was their last day of work for the week, and both Wade and Ron were put into the magnesium mines. They had spent most of the day apart gathering minerals from separate areas of the mining zone, and asides from occasionally looking over his shoulder for F, especially after making that daring note placement the day before, things went smoothly.
Wade had gotten about three carts worth of magnesium, along with the rare sight of a gem and the like. After this shift, Wade was sure that he and the other miners would be able to get some rest for the night, then depart on the shuttles for Earth the next morning. He had a brief thought about his beloved Tina before he overheard F walking over to him.
"Well I'll say, not too bad for your first days here rookie. You look like quite the natural." She said in an impressed tone as Wade brushed his slightly messy hair.
"Yeah, funny enough, this isn't my first mining job." F gave a raised eyebrow at that, and kept it up as Wade continued. "Ron and I did mostly mining and a good bit of farming in our years together."
The disassembly drone gave a smirk at his words. "Hard laborer, eh? I like guys with that caliber."
"And it's a honest way to make a living." He said as he looked to the large window above the mining area, shining on the rock walls around the cavern. "Kinda hope I can make enough to bring my Tina something special. She deserves it for all she does."
F seemed to hold a chuckle at that as she commented. "Well, I hope that engagement goes well. Speaking of..." She pulled out a note from her jacket pocket, Wade faking curiosity under panic as she asked him, "Do you uh, know who made this? I found it while I was coming back to my post after checking on one of the workers."
Of course he knew who it was that made it, he did the deed for him after all, but Wade kept his act up for Nathan. "Strange, what's it say?"
F opened up the note, growing slightly embarrassed as she read it. "F is as bright as Fire, a sharp blade of Fury. I see beauty in such, and to shield you, I wish to very much. Some lover boy." Holding the paper up to Wade, she asked further. "I wonder, you think you can recognize that handwriting?"
Wade looked upon the words before faking an answer. "Hmm... I don't think I've seen that kind specifically, Ron's handwriting ain't near that kind of-"
*BOOM*
The two, along with the others in the mine, were interrupted by an explosion nearby, down in one of the other caverns. The ground shook under Wade and F as they heard the intercom alarm blare, along with a message that was almost as deafening as the klaxon. "ALERT! LASER PLATFORM MALFUNCTION IN SECTOR 7-C! ALERT! LASER PLATFORM MALFUNCTION IN SECTOR 7-C!"
Sector 7-C, that was where Ron went last time he saw him, Wade thought, panic growing in his mind as F immediately began to fly through the cavern to her target. Wade chased after her too, praying that Ron wasn't among the injured, assuming there were any, that is. Passing by a pillar holding the cavern together, the two drones came over to see the chaos: The large mining laser built for firing at the asteroids outside Ceres had a chunk of it's swivel base in fire, debris having broken off and fallen to the ground below. Several other miners were gathered around the entrance area, loudly debating on the horrid situation.
Looking among the crowd, Wade could see his brother Ron, and his friends Nathan and Kurtis among them, no injuries visible. Running over to them, he squeezed his way to Nathan as F made her way to the entrance to the turret control room, which was bellowing out smoke from the damage the room had taken from the explosion above. Wade nudged Nathan as he asked him, "What happened?!"
"The turret just exploded while it was mining, I think it must've failed cause of the maintenance crews! They slacked off on this one!" Tension grew as F withdrew her gaze from the burning room, a man yelling from inside as the drone guard spoke aloud.
"There's some people in here, stay clear while I get them out!" The group followed her orders as she ran into the room, seeing Gerard pinned down by one of the turret parts that broke off from above. Wade and his friends watched as the drone heaved the debris off of Gerard in order to let him crawl out of the spot he was in. Then suddenly, another explosion shook the room, more debris falling down to the ground below. Most of it didn't harm the crowd watching the chaos, but one landed right in front of the entrance to the control bay, trapping F and Gerard inside.
​
"DANGER! TURRET CORE IS OVERLOADING! CLEAR THE AREA IMMEDIATELY!" The intercom rang loudly as most of the crowd began to spread out away from the area near the turret, Wade, Ron, Nathan, and Kurtis staying as Wade noticed a gap on the debris. With a good amount of effort, he and his friends could lift it and save the two on the other end.
Without hesitation, Wade made his way to the debris, trying to pry it up from the door as Ron looked on in concern. "Wade, what the hell are you doing?!"
Wade grunted as he replied to Ron, "We can lift this! We gotta get them out of there! Help me with this!" Despite the danger and little time they most likely had to evacuate the cavern, Wade was not going to leave his co-workers to die if he could help it. "COME ON!" He ushered once more, prompting Ron, Nathan and Kurtis to rush to his aid. Together, they lifted the debris up, allowing F to get a claw out to assist them further.
F seemed to understand Ron's assessment of the situation. "You're all crazy to be doing this! The turret's gonna blow any second!"
"Just get Gerard outta there, quickly!" Wade replied as the disassembly drone did so, carrying the man out of the hole. The second they were out, they dropped the scrap and gunned for the nearest tunnel. As they got halfway to it from the control room, the turret exploded again, this time the metal stalk broke in two, causing enormous amounts of flaming debris to spread out to not just the control area below, but around the cavern as well. Thankfully, it seemed Wade and his cohorts were just far enough to not be hit by any of it.
F pulled out a small radio from her pocket before speaking into it. "F to Door Control, keep the door to Tunnel 7-22 open for a few more seconds! I got workers with me! Out!" Putting her radio away, F ushered the rest out through the tunnel, Nathan taking position behind the group as they went through the tunnel and into the cavern Wade was in earlier.
As the team exited the tunnel, Nathan looked back into it as he called out, "F! Come on!" The disassembly drone sprinted out of the tunnel as the emergency door closed on it, another boom sounding as the turret continued to be torn apart from the damage it sustained. Outside through the windows above, a few ships could be seen making their way over to the turret, fire suppressant materials being shot at it to cool off the destroyed laser.
The group took heavy breaths as they relished in the calm of the situation, Wade looking up to the others as he asked them, "Is everyone alright?"
Ron shook himself off as he answered his brother in a disgruntled tone. "I'm good."
"Nothing bad on me!" Nathan said as F came over to the group.
"I'm alive, nothing else to say." Gerard replied as Ron spoke up to Wade, seemingly frustrated.
"It's good that we made it, but what were you thinking Wade? You could've gotten hurt out there!"
Wade retorted with similar frustration. "I was trying to help them Ron, what was I supposed to do?! Leave them to die?!"
"EVERYONE, please." F said loudly to the bunch, shutting them up in an instant as she continued. "While Wade's rescue maneuver was indeed very risky, he saved me and a fellow worker. He deserves nothing but praise for that."
"Yes, he does." Gerard said to the others, surprising Wade and Nathan a bit as the latter raised an eyebrow. Walking over to Wade, Gerard spoke once more to him. "I was very wrong to you that day. VERY wrong." With that, Gerard made way for the other caverns, F watching on for a moment before speaking to the rest of the workers.
"Well, with that out of the way, return to your posts. For those who were in 7-C, head to the medbay for health check-up." The miners in front of Wade and his friends heeded F's orders as they dispersed, F turning to the other four as she spoke to them. "Again, thanks for that. If it wasn't for you, there would've been a real nasty casualty report for us to fill out."
Nathan seemed to let his intrusive thoughts win as he embraced F tightly, surprising the guard drone in her spot as Nathan spoke up. "I'm just glad we're all okay. Gerard and F could've gotten killed if we didn't help them."
"...Right, just what I was saying." Slowly nudging Nathan, the worker drone broke the embrace in embarrassment as F continued. "I think you guys could use a little rest after that. I'll take care of the paperwork for this mess. Go get something to eat."
"I should probably get that cart up to the refining station too." Wade commented as Ron replied, his disgruntlement mostly dissipated.
"I'll help with that." Wade seemed to smile at that as F spoke once more.
"Good to hear, I'll check in with you guys at the changing booths at Entrance 2-B." With that, F dismissed the group, Wade making his way back to the cart he was using as Ron walked with him. Then, stopping, F turned and called to Nathan. "Mr. Nathan?" The drone looked to F for a moment before turning to Kurtis, nodding for him to go on as he jogged over to F. He immediately blushed as he saw the disassembly drone pull out a note. "I'm guessing this was your idea?"
Wade almost wanted to chuckle at the wholesome sight, but shook it off as he tried to talk to Ron, who was helping him move the mining cart to the elevator. "Hey, Ron?"
No response.
"...Ron?" He said again in a low tone. He seemed to acknowledge him, but didn't say a word as they both went up the tunnel. Wade slowly looked down in shame, feeling as though he'd done something wrong. The Carters didn't say anything as they exited the tunnel, trekking through the next magnesium cavern.
...
Wade stretched his arms as he prepared to lie down on his bed, his attire changed to his normal civilian clothing. The resting huts were all set atop a small, layered cavern close to the surface of Ceres, a large window providing an immense view of the asteroid field beyond. Upon the 5 layers of rock were several huts, roughly 10 to 14 per section. Each hut looked to be a set of pylons holding up some foil, with around four beds in each one for the workers to sleep in. A light also illuminated each of the huts, with a switch attached to one of the pylons that allowed for one to turn the light off should they feel the need.
Looking out the large window, he observed the stars flickering out in space for a moment, pondering over the thought if one of those stars was where Tina was. He smiled at the thought of seeing her again once they both returned to Earth, maybe he could find a nice gift for her before they met up. Sighing, he sat himself down on the bed before laying back, resting his head on the pillow before turning to his side. Looking on, he remembered Ron was sitting behind him, facing the other way as he rested. Remembering what had just happened, he dared to speak up. "Ron? You still up?"
"Yes." Ron replied simply, Wade turning over to face his back before continuing.
"About that whole.... I'm.... I'm sorry if I did anything wrong. I just wanted to-"
"No, no, no. Wade, it's just..." Ron interrupted him calmly, steadying himself as he kept on. "You did the right thing. I-" He sighed at himself as he tried to find his words. "I just didn't want to see you get hurt. I shouldn't have snapped at you like that back there."
Wade seemed to be a little eased by that, but he still felt bad for upsetting Ron. "I know, I just.... I wanted to help our friends. I didn't want us to lose them either."
Ron let out a muffled chortle as he turned around to face Wade. "I know what you mean, it's truly good what you did. If anything, I'd say if we were in each other's place, I'd have done the same." Then, smiling at Wade, "It's just the right thing to do."
Wade seemed to warm up at Ron's words, sharing the smile as he moved to hug him. "Thanks Ron."
"Don't mention it." Then, as the too broke their lying embrace, Ron sarcastically finished with, "Just try to be more careful, okay?"
Wade nodded in agreement as they both got comfortable in their beds, the two brothers shutting their eyes as Wade spoke once more. "Goodnight Ron."
"Night Wade." Ron replied as they both let themselves fall to slumber, Wade's green eyes eventually shifting into text that read, "SLEEP MODE" as he went to sleep.
...
Location: The Administrator's Lab - California, Earth
Dark clouds rolled over the city of San Francisco as three aircraft, two retrofitted Apache attack helicopters and one Anteater VTOL transport, flew over the cityscape towards a tall, grey building. Despite it's name, the Anteater was a moderate craft, bearing two arms at the sides of the fuselage with swiveling windblades. At the back of the craft were two small thrusters, pushing the craft up in order to ensure it stayed airborne for the flight. At the front was a curved, translucent canopy, grey armor plating covering the sides of the window which stopped at a bubble window at the VTOL's nose.
Finally, within the large bay at the underside of the ship, were three humans in shiny chrome attire, six worker drones at their sides with varying types of firearms. Some held a pistol bearing bullets while others carried a laser sidearm with them. As for Head Researcher and his escorts, Halloway carried his own high-grade sidearm, capable of turning his drone minions to ashes should they step out of line. Halloway's human guards carried a rifle each, one being a laser rifle and the other an older kinetic firearm.
The tower Halloway was heading to was the Administrator's Lab, the place where the company had gained so many new marvels over the past two decades. The Anteater slowed as it neared the large landing pad sitting atop the building. Descending, the VTOL's landing gear extended out as it touched the ground below. The two wings shifted along the craft's side, folding down as to cling to the Anteater's hull. The group released their grip on the handles at the ceiling of the craft, stepping out onto the platform they landed on before Edgar began to walk over to the doorway at the end of the pad.
"You two, watch my ship." Edgar ordered to his guards as they ceased their escort, turning to stand near the Anteater as their boss continued to the door.
Pulling out his ID, Halloway slid it into the doorpad before a robotic voice spoke to him through the speaker. "IDENTIFICATION STEP ONE COMPLETE. HAND PRINT SCAN IS REQUIRED." The Head Researcher did as instructed as he put a hand over the flat touch panel above the doorpad, the color of the scanner glowing green after a few seconds of waiting.
"STEP TWO COMPLETE. CREDENTIALS ACCEPTED. WELCOME, DR. HALLOWAY." As the speaker ceased, the door unsealed before Edgar stepped inside, the door closing once more as he walked through the short hallway. Aside from a few worker drones taking papers and tools across the room to the many doors at the walls, Edgar was by himself, walking steadily to the door at the other end of the room.
Upon reaching the door, he tapped a button on the panel before it opened, Edgar stepping into it as the door shut behind him. The elevator descended smoothly as Edgar pulled out the data drive he brought with him, courtesy of Mr. Jenson himself. It contained the aforementioned blueprints for the newer disassembly drones Jenson wanted overviewed by the Administrator in order for her to make the requested changes to her lineup. Quality was a golden rule of JCJenson, after all.
Halloway stood firm as the door opened, taking in the initial sights before walking in. The entrance was guarded by two disassembly drones, who saluted to Halloway as he stepped inside. As for the room itself, it was lit by the white blue lights on the ceiling above, around the room were several technologically adept tables, holoscreens and buttons decorating their surfaces as a few humans worked on a few of them. At the walls of the hallways in between the room was a symbol: a hexagon with three arrows pointing away from the center. Two lines of text were placed above and under the symbol respectively, reading, "Solver Project - Advanced R&D Facilites".
Passing through the hall, Edgar slowed as one of the scientists spoke up to him. "Ah, good to see you, Dr. Halloway. What brings you here today?"
Edgar walked over to the worker as he answered them. "I'm here under orders from Mr. Jenson, I must speak to our little Admin over there." Before the worker could look away, Edgar ushered calmly. "It's a private matter."
The scientist nodded at the news, turning to his fellow researchers before ordering them to follow him. "Everyone out, Mr. Halloway has business to conclude here in private."
Looking to the two drone guards at the door, Edgar nodded to them as well before they returned the gesture, both following the workers out into the elevator before shutting the door. Now that he was alone, he made his way down to the second hallway, which led to another, much larger room. The room was tinted in an ominous yellow light alongside the white-blue. The walls of this room bore the same symbol and text as the hallways did. The ceiling bore a window that showed the cause of the odd lighting: a small singularity holding stable above the room. Rather than chairs or tables and the like, there were only two things in this area: a circular hologram panel and two screens up against the wall facing the hallway, one large and one small.
Edgar stopped just ahead of the holopad on the floor as he spoke to the monitors. "Cyn, come on out. We need to talk."
The being in question obeyed the man's request as the wall symbol flickered into view on the small monitor, the larger one displaying a pixelated drone face. The drone had a set of yellow eyes and silver hair, with two strings going down along the sides of its head, as well as a bow tied to the top of its hair.
Ever since that incident in the manor, Cyn had, to her surprise, gained a following amongst some of those at JCJenson. They saw an opportunity to capitalize on the Solver and it's power after they found her and her first disassembly drones all those years ago. Hoping to gain more power, she guised working under the company in order to help them better their products and creations.
Of course, most sane members of the company, especially Mr. Jenson, would've flipped out over the idea of helping a potentially hazardous drone. But not these people... Not Halloway. They helped to spread the Solver to other colonies, hoping to further their goals of bettering humanity and it's technological aptitude. And from the looks of it, it was working. They had used Cyn's disassembly drones to great effect, wiping out defective colonies wherever they appeared. Not only that, but the Solver that affected Cyn was able to ease the troubles of construction and immense labor, such as repair craft and exo-suits. Even some farming jobs were benefitted by this program, even if the organic materials used in enhancing these new food products grossed some customers out.
The Administrator, Cyn, spoke to Edgar in a robotic, inhuman manner. "Why hello, Mr. Halloway. What brings you to the labs?"
Edgar changed his tone to one of closeness, almost like he was talking to a daughter he never had. "Cyn, your drones have proven quite exceptional at their job, but... It seems Mr. Jenson is getting concerned over certain design traits."
"Is it the failing cooling units, perhaps?" Cyn asked as Edgar gave a hint of a smile under his stern face.
"Yes, it seems he dislikes the fact these drones are essentially sent on suicide missions and wants a few upgrades placed in the design."
Cyn seemed to glitch out slightly as she spoke to her minion. "Giggle, seems my naughtiness has been exposed, hasn't it, Mr. Halloway?"
"Indeed." Edgar replied as he pulled out the data drive, holding it out to the Administrator before continuing. "Here are the specs Jenson requested, he wants them looked through and worked into the main schematics as soon as possible."
A long, mechanical tendril drooped down from the ceiling, picking up the drive as Cyn spoke to Edgar. "There won't be any problems, I will examine these plans and enhance our units by the week. No longer than that."
"That's good to hear." Edgar said as he began to turn, but stopped as he remembered another job he wanted to propose. "Oh, and Cyn, could you... look into potential candidates for the Disassembly Drone Division? We could use some new faces for the army." Snickering lightly, he finished with, "Especially with flying those damn pods around."
Cyn let a low hum through as she answered the researcher's request. "Good idea, they may also be good targets to test the new models on. I will see to it at once."
Edgar gave a respectful bow as he concluded the meeting. "Excellent, then I believe we're good here. Good hunting, Cyn."
"It was nice seeing you again." The Administrator replied as Edgar left the area, Cyn watching him enter the elevator before bringing up a field of black pixels around her monitor. With the room enshrouded in a cloak of darkness, Cyn began to pull up several screens, a few of the new schematics for the disassembly drone upgrades, while the other showed several different recordings of various worker drones. The variety was extensive, one showing a blue haired drone girl seated in a large transport, checking the controls. Another screen showed a drone putting up a brutal firefight against several rogue drones and humans on a past incident on one of the colony worlds, and another showed a drone helping to save a pair of workers trapped in an exploding mine.
While the screens would only show so many images at once, Cyn could see all she wished regardless. Hundreds of potential killers for her army, such additions could strengthen the capabilities of her puppets immensely. Of course, her human cohorts wouldn't be around long enough to see it come to fruition. No one would.
"Giggle Giggle, Such insane idiots. To trust us to handle their industrial evolution." The Solver-ridden drone said to herself as she looked over the monitors further. "The puppets won't need this, otherwise their strings will be cut." Cyn hid the section showing the new coolant unit inside the body of the disassembly drone. "Soon, the flesh will invite itself in, and everything will be consumed. Giggle, Laugh Out Loud, Maniacal Laugh..." Cyn repeated her intended actions as she oversaw the blueprints and the drone candidates on her screens, panels shifting around one another as the pixelated drone prepared her plans.
...
Location: B-02, Eridanus Beta System
"Launch Control, Chiron S.S. Lovelock will depart in 2 minutes." The intercom spoke aloud to the area surrounding the launch site of the S.S. Lovelock, a Chiron class civilian starjet. The ship was built with a sharp form, a set of curved windows on the bridge, two large wings holding the long ion nacelles at the sides, with two fins extending forward from each engine. At the back of the main hull were two dorsal fins sweeping back to the end of the ship, six cylindrical thrust engines covering the aft end of the ship.
The sun shown high above the Lovelock as several monitor craft flew about, keeping watch on the starjet in case something was wrong on the exterior of the ship. Inside the bridge, Tina flicked several switches as she performed the systems check.
"Fuel tanks are at full capacity, thrusters are nominal." The pilot drone said aloud as Jasmine did her side of the systems check.
"Solar screens are in order, engine clamps are stable, we're ready to bring out the boosters."
"Calling up boosters... now." Tina replied as she tapped a button on her control panel, looking out the window to see if she could spot the boosters they called for. Outside the ship, four circular hatches opened up, and four tall, grey booster engines lifted up out from them and in between the frame's clamps. The frame was ring-shaped, with four slots to attach the engines for launching into space.
Tina smiled with satisfaction as she heard the engines being attached to the frame's connection clamps. Checking her panel, she saw green on all four rockets. "Booster frame installed successfully."
"Alright, let's get those ion engines ready." Jasmine said as she pressed a few buttons on her console, but stopped after noticing Tina was gazing out the window. She was observing the surface of B-02 one last time before they left, taking in the beautiful green sky, the huge moon in orbit, the large beasts flying around the launch site. This was one place Tina felt Wade had to see later on.
Putting a hand on her shoulder, the human asked her drone sister, "You alright?"
Tina nodded to her before answering. "Yes, I'm fine. It's just... I just hope Wade and I can come back here soon."
"We will, Tina. We will." Jasmine reassured her co-pilot as the two returned to their previous task. "Everything should be attached, calling off launch clamps."
Outside, the ship's ion engines and fuselage was released by a set of low cranes and restraining clamps, leaving the ship free to take off as the clamps began to retract into the launch pad.
Tina checked the console above her window as she spoke. "Power levels are moderate, just as they should be."
"What about the emergency cryo-pods?" Jasmine asked Tina before the latter answered.
"Testing it now, stand by." Tapping a few buttons on her console, she activated the cryo storage pods before flicking a switch on the camera section, getting herself a view of the cryo-pods. One by one, then two by two, and so on. Once all the cryopods activated, Tina looked over the console and it's readout of the pods. "All pods are in order. Is that everything?"
"Yes it is." Pulling up the comm speaker, Jasmine spoke into it. "Launch Control, this is the Lovelock. All systems are fully optimized, we stand ready for departure."
"Affirmative, Lovelock. You have the all clear, and may depart on your call." The person at Control replied as Jasmine looked to Tina, smiling to her as she spoke to her.
"You wanna do the honors?"
Tina returned the warm smile as she held back a chuckle in her reply. "I'd be happy to, love."
With a tap of a switch, the booster engines roared to life, fire shooting out of their ends as the Lovelock lifted into the air. Soaring into the sky, the booster set sent the Chiron through the green sky and clouds, eventually breaking through the atmosphere before the frame ceased its thrust. Several bangs sounded as the booster frame disassembled itself, breaking off of the starjet and falling to the planet below.
As the ion engines began to power up, Tina looked out to the space before them. The beautiful forest world of B-02 mesmorized not just the two pilots, but many sitting in the passenger cabin. The planet was a green world with two rings encircling it. A single moon orbited B-02, a bluish grey rock with a few lit up outposts on it's surface. A small space station orbited near the moon, several ships flying around it as the moon began to eclipse the magnificent blue sun.
Bringing her attention back to her station, Tina spoke into the intercom. "S.S. Lovelock boosters disengaged, activating main thrusters."
The aft engines growled as they came on, the Lovelock pushing forward as it began to depart Eridanus B-02. As the ship cleared the traffic zone, the starjet shot out at full speed, soaring away from the planet as it prepared to jump.
"This is the Lovelock, we're clear of any and all traffic and are preparing to depart." Tina continued over the comms as Control replied.
"Good to hear, Lovelock. The word is given. Safe travels."
"Same to you, Control. Lovelock out." At those words, Jasmine switched off the comms, leaving the two pilots alone with themselves and their passengers.
Tina looked out to the stars ahead, her eyes beaming brightly as she thought of Wade. "So, that way?"
"Indeed, that way." Jasmine replied to the drone lady as the latter tapped the intercom button before speaking into it.
"Attention all hands, we're preparing for an Ion jump. Strap yourselves in," Then, putting her hand onto the lever for the ion drive, she finished her announcement. "...and enjoy the ride."
Slowly pushing the lever forward, the ship's nacelles began to charge up, the orange bussards at the front of them glowing even more brighter before a flash appeared at the back of the ship. Said flash sent the ship away into the stars, glimpses of meteors and space dust whooshing by as the two relaxed themselves in their seats.
Tina checked the star-charts on her controls, observing the graph of their ship's course to Earth as she spoke aloud. "From this estimate, we should arrive at Earth in about 7 hours. Plenty of time to relax till we get back home."
Jasmine stretched her arms as she spoke up. "I could use a drink after all that waiting."
"You want me to grab one?" Tina offered to Jasmine, to which the latter responded by opening a compartment with several holders and spaces for items small enough to fit in them.
"Be my guest." The Fowleys shared a chortle before Tina got up from her seat, making her way to the door before turning once more.
"Oh, let's just watch the holder. Last time I handled that it broke with only a breath."
The two failed to hold back a laugh as Jasmine replied to the reference to that one bad flight they had over a month ago. "Oh, that one was on them. They didn't check to see if it was properly latched."
"Yes, I know." Tina said under a giggle as she opened the door and went out to the cabin, Jasmine sitting back and gazing out to the stars ahead.
"Wonder what the boys are doing back home?" The pilot asked to herself as the Lovelock soared through space, the peace and quiet of ion flight comforting Jasmine as she laid back in her chair.

Now let's talk about the music. Can we talk about the music please? I've been going insane to talk about the music, okay? I love how well fit the soundtrack is to game, how it's like a puzzle that fits in every place, but also how it provides the explanation to what happens. I decided I won't be dividing it, because I prefer it to be in once place, so I would get lost, because I can get very easily get lost.
Also, English isn't my native language. If sentences sound weird, it's probably because they are, there might some grammar errors, which I could miss, but I tried my best. I am sorry and thank you for understanding.
I know everybody at this point knows about classical music put in the game, but I made this post to appreciate the soundtrack in a way that is presented in game, as well as what it bring in terms of feeling and vibes I took from it. I am not specialist on music, so most of this opinions are essentially "what I think is presented to us" thoughts. I will do it in the order I found on spotify, here. I hope nobody did it before, otherwise I will be very sad.
This is have become something more, than it was when I started writing about it. And while I still go through it track by track, there is now more than just analysing music. So, if you wish to listen me being obsessive, take a seat and enjoy. If I wasn't insane before, I soon will be.
Turned Around - the echo, the lone place, you enter the place you perhaps you are familiar with, but also feels alien. It is twisted, changed and filled with darkness, but also not dead. Something is there in the shadows, and there is something in its deeps. And it is your mission to find it.
Safe Room - you might be safe, it might be a place when you rest, hide your things and prepare for another fight. But also it sounds like warning, like it spoke "you know what's there", but in soft, hush voice.
Casual Loop - it's more cosy for me. "All that happened already" and it feels like falling asleep (dying) but then there is this tension on the end, like it send you "wake up, remember why you are here".
Double Back - it's continuation of Casual Loop, but even sadder somehow. The name is deceptive - we can't double back, and Elster would never. But now, we also know there is other person who wouldn't, Isa. They both understand why they do what they do, and can relate to each other. But also they seem to know, that it perhaps would never be possible. But again, they can't double back, they would never.
Pneumatic - industrial machine, endlessly working up and down. We hear steam's hiss, we hear when it goes up and makes this loud noise. It is eternal, it will never stop. Just like you, Elster, just like you.
Eternity in the Box - that's Ariane's theme. She is in the box, she is on the empty ship, you can hear the void around her, and lies there what it feels like eternity. The distortion are her bioresonance distorting the reality, as it feel like you would take something around and started to stretch it like rubber, and leave it morphed into something else.
Visions of Alina - this is less a music and more like signal. Broken (we can hear it even as it breaks in the music) and indecipherable. Elster thinks about her, remembers her, looks for her - but the signal is no longer valid, message is worn down and there is nobody to look for.
Incinerator - "things have learnt to walk that ought to crawl". The long sounds feels like flesh that now sag on Aras and moves with their skeleton, they arms and legs bang over steel and there is this feeling of chase - you can almost feel as their stretch their corrupted limbs towards you, to take you to their vents and... better not to know what they will do there. And also it's all cut the moment you leave. They stop to walk, and crawl back to their vents, like they ought.
Intensive Care - the nurse is here, and the only cure is death. Similar to Incinerator, you hear banging of their legs over steel as they walk, but they are less chaotic and more focused, less a chance a more like slow walk towards you. They want to care and cook, and you look like a fine piece of meat, so quickly they turn with their knifes to you. There is this sound, like choir, like they try to talk to you, beg you to let them it, which is cut off, as quick as you leave the room. But it doesn't stop. I can imagine them knocking over door, to follow you, the loneliness is too much for them, but that's for nothing - you left.
Train Raid - something actually relaxing. Melancholic, nostalgic - probably what Ariane feels, when she raided her train and thought about her home high in the mountains. Elster does not know who white-haired girl, but she feels important, she feels like somebody she should walk to, as so she do. White-haired girl disappears, like a dream that never was, but also, leaves us with a golden key - a literal clue, that we are on the right path and we should follow her.
Ritual - feels like continuation of Safe Room. Moment of rest. But also moment of revelation - we found door to progress. This is the moment of hope.
MNHR - gentle, cosy, even a soft flapping of a little bird. It feels like songbird, which is very fitting for their name, mynas. Perfect melody for gentle giantess.
Mynah - have you ever had a friend that is always calm? Like nothing can't tip them off? And do you also had this intense fear in the moment when this calm, chill friend gets angry? This is the music for it. They are still cool, but you feel they have changed. They are no longer calm, and hatred boils inside them. The short high-pitched notes feels either like needles, which Mynahs shots while loading their gun (also shooting itself in the game feels like it was made along side music), as well as sounds that triggered Mynahs make, but done in mechanical way. How heavy it sounds, you can feel it weigh and hardness before you, and that you rather should wait, that fight outright.
Adler - this one is very interesting. If I wouldn't know, I would say it's continuation of Safe Room. On the one hand, it works like a knife in the back, as we, and Elster, are betreyed. We expect to get a reward after beating mynah, while Elster thinks she met somebody who's rational and "the same type as her" - a loner replika. But on the other hand, it feels like metamorphosis. Adler works as catalyst - he takes Elster false memory of Alina, and push her down, not knowing that he actually helps us in achieving our goals. He makes her transform by force.
Dowsing - even in memories of different people we look for something, and it always ends up being Ariane. I feel that a lot of soft music hides how much depressed Araine had to be, growing around people who disliked you and found you weird. There is tension in it, showing that probably Ariane was afraid each day, if she will be bullied, or will they leave her alone. And makes me wonder - do we really see what Isa see, or do we see what Ariane wants us to see, or perhaps there is something else to it. No matter what, music feels like falling. We are deep in it, and we have no way to go back.
Bodies - nothing much to say, soft music of self-realisation. We see bodies of us who failed. We will be the same? Or will we succeed? It's like iceberg - the deeper we go, the more we discover and understand.
Hamstrung - it feels like mix of Pneumatic and Turn Around - corridors haunted by ghosts, twisted into endless machine. Elster is closer, but still sealed in the dark coffin. She's perpetuum mobile, endlessly moving between ghost of the past.
Riot Control - my personal favourite. The drums gives away the feeling of lines of Stars, beating their batons over shields. The order was"NO MERCY" and you will be begging for death. It has this cruel and brutal, as they will beat you into submission, break not only your body but also your soul and mind. They will beat you until there will be nothing to bury. And it doesn't stop, it gets better - they start a chase. Stars are the first replikas we meet that actually have military experience, and it feels. While the rest are kind of chaotic monsters who reacts on impulses, Stars are not. No, they are finally set free - you are not fighting with them, you are being hunted. Even the end, when we killed them off or left the room it doesn't feel like defeated them. It feels more like walking through battlefield - you didn't won, you survived.
Kolibri - sound of insanity. Their mind is consumed and like a chant they all sing. Sad, that we can't tell what they sing, or maybe pray, as all its a radio signal. Elster can only disturb them setting her radio and knock off their concentration. Their insanity reveals in their desire - to not be alone. They have great need to be surrounded by other Kolibri, and that's why they make their own copies. They sing a song, that the other Kolibri (the one that reminded sane in library, KLBR-S2302) wants to join them (the great hive mind, as all other KLBR has number S2301, meaning that their personalities mixed together when the first one pulled all of them down). The awful feeling of being left behind is so terrifying for her, that she considers that, perhaps, becoming insane might be better option. At least, she wouldn't be alone.
Eulenlieder - roughly Owl Song. A tragedy. The last thing that probably kept them sane against corruption was killed by sheer malice. Now, their dorm empty, and only broken cassette and stabbed audio player remains, informing of failed last stance. But somehow, it doesn't sound sad. The video noise gives makes it sound like waves on the beach, hinting that perhaps, it was more than just a music. Giving the fact that beach seems to be important for gestalt that was base for Elster, perhaps that's she doesn't see it as something bad. It almost feel like memory, perhaps it is a memory. Also, interesting is that in comparison to other ones, it has upbeat. Like there was more in it, something that we can't know, but probably gestalt Elster would know. It is for us to wonder, for her to know.
Orrery - this one is interesting. It's name is kinda what it connect to where we hear it. "An orrery is a mechanical model of the Solar System that illustrates or predicts the relative positions and motions of the planets and moons, usually according to the heliocentric model" from wikipedia. It's smoothing in a way that in against all odds, against Empire's and Nation's regimes, there might be a future, where on all planets are not longer inhabited by gestalts and replikas, but by people being people. A different kind of hope in a game where most is focused around Elster looking for Ariane, this one is more about things as they are now, in general. After all, we look above the solar system, even letting Elster comment on current political situation.
Ewige Wiederkunft - "Eternal return". Once again, similar in tone to Safe Room, but it isn't our safe room, but Adler's. A nostalgic and melancholic place, where he can rest and thinking, and where he normally would enjoy his new Fetish Object and ease his boredom. It feels like Adler's theme, which is very ftting - he is in the loop. He is returning to the same point, over and over again. He is responsible for the station, he was created to be responsible for the station. But he grows desperate as well as nihilistic. No matter what he does, nothing is solved, but even worse, everything gets more broken. Changed, twisted, added and removed. Everything will repeat the same way - Falke falls sick, units gets corrupted, gestalts dies, flesh grows, Elster enters Sierpinski and causes chaos. And he can't do anything - it gets reset and he starts again, from the same spot. Nothing that he does matters, nothing that doesn't do matters. A victim in endless loop, cursed to be a witness of Sierpinski's doom and not being able to do anything about it. He is like Greek tragic hero. He wasn't a villain, but antagonist - he also like Elster wanted to break the cycle. It just wan't his fate to do it.
Liminality - "is the quality of ambiguity or disorientation that occurs in the middle stage of a rite of passage, when participants no longer hold their pre-ritual status but have not yet begun the transition to the status they will hold when the rite is complete." Elster is almost there. She is in final stage of her search, perhaps the farthest she has ever been. But a lot is before her.
Kentucky Meat Shower - If I could ask author why, I would ask about this one - why this name. Why Meat, Why Shower, and why Kentucky. It connected with Alder falling into pit, down to Nowhere. It is probably first time, as he states that he done this already and I think he meant killing Isa. But... just why? Is that reference to something I am too stupid to get? ... oh it is. Huh. I guess it's raining Adlers, hallelujah. Perhaps this allusion about where we are about to go - into flesh. Music itself sounds very much something you would hear in slasher movie. Honestly, Kentucky Meat Shower does sounds like B-movie horror. But also, there is this role reversal where the hunter (Adler) is being defeated by the prey (Isa).
Haint Tales - we stand before ghosts' nest, we are at source, we are the gate to the place that Is-Not. Corrupted machines, deep breathing of rotting replikas and steel hitting steel like often we hear when corrupted replikas were noticing us and trying to get us. Once again, Elster must get deeper. But now, we enter to haints' (ghosts) domain. But what ghosts? Ghost of the... past?
Misremembered - Alina is gone, Elster. You are dead, Elster. You are not looking for Alina. You never did. Try to remember, try to really remember. I know it hurts, but you must let it go. You tried to find a place that is nowhere now, so you have arrived to Nowhere. Yes, I am being melodramatic, but I think capture well what it meant to be. Perhaps it's Ariane, or perhaps it something deep inside Elster memory that calls to her, a feeling that's something is off. The went to look for Alina, right? Then why it feels wrong? Like she was remember it wrong, like there was something calling. What does this book mean? Elster tries to remember, but it will long before she will be able to understand. The long noises similar to Liminality and Hamstrung reminds us that we are half-way, and can do only one thing - keep going.
Nue - Added and removed. Changed and twisted. Similar to the one in Japanese folklore, it is a beast made of many other animals, in that situation, two Storchs (honestly, there could be more, but two long pairs of legs are the only visible ones for me). It is a demon, which often connected to bringing bad omens and ills. Also, it nature is hinted to be unknown, but saying that something is unknown in Signalis is like saying nothing. Musically, it's similar to Mynah and Intensive Care, a slow walking while also we hear replikas hooves (are they hooves? They do look like) its over the steel tiles. But, there is some kind of difference - the catharsis. For the first time, he haven't have to do it alone, as Isa helped us. It felt like we are not alone. Isa grows more and more in character, to conquer her fear that she have always relay on others, and saves us.
Matryoshka - its mechanical sound, similar to Pneumatic. But this time, it's not Elster who's the machine, but our dear Mynahs. How's like to be imprisoned inside the machine, to be a unable to embrace people without fear that you might hurt them? Matryoshka is a Russian doll, which represents each generation of mothers - the biggest being often grandmothers, and the little ones inside being little kids or newborns. In game it's interesting as we don't put doll inside doll, but we kinda put layers on base doll. Mynahs are mother and protectors, gentle in their ways to others, as files states. But also, deeply inside them, they are like lost, traumatised child, who would want to hug others when they feel scared. Is their armour their 'skin'? Or is it just armour and they can put it away? I think the first one is true. They are prisoners of their own bodies they did not wish to have. No wonder Beo prefers to die, than gets fixed - she might say its because she doesn't want to be a burden, but I think deep inside, she also doesn't want to live in world where she can't be a mother, and where she is send to dangerous parts of mines. Perhaps that's why stuffed animals are so badly needed for her - she wants to hug something, and stuffed animals is something that you can't break, no matter how hard you hug it. Even here, in mechanical machine, she sacrifices herself to loneliness, so could Elster go forward. Like Mynahs do all the time for the other replikas.
Labyrinth - "things have learnt to walk that ought to crawl". It less primal and more dangerous sounding than Incinerator. We just need to walk carefully and grab what we need. But also, there are Aras chasing us, quickening our heartbeat. It's less a fight, and more a run.
Prison - distorted, ringing of metals bars over crates, video noises. It always makes me think, that Nowhere is memory of every replika about them being born. Like we, gestalts, don't remember moments of their birth, they also don't. But it's still there, deep in their consciousness. And in heartless Nation's regime, they are born in confusion. Prison is good name, considering how this place has no exit, and its filled with "wardens" (a just much more corrupted enemies, Sniffers - I don't remember what was their names, but you probably know what I mean). It seems that it's less about fighting, and more about surviving, like being sealed in the box. We can kill each other, but it won't change that we are imprisoned.
Coal Ash Slurry - another one of these mechanical ones. However, in the context of Nowhere, it feels very fitting. We have this ever present flesh contained by steel. And what are replikas, if not flesh (gestalt personality and memories) imprisoned inside steel (replikas metal body and its functions). Word slurry means "a thin mixture of an insoluble substance, as cement, clay, or coal, with a liquid, as water or oil" which feels like something in which replikas are made. A deep memories of birth, and moments before you learn of your function in tyrannical cast system made by Nation, you feel this dread of being born. You think, but have nothing to think about, you remember but you have nothing to remember about, you feel but you have no names for this feelings. You are like a golem made of clay, not sure what you should be doing, and what you are and what's your purpose. But soon, your 'masters' give you things to do and teaches you how to obey.
Sea Smoke - uff, we escape for a moment from transhumanism horror to... I'm not sure what. This sounds familiar to other more classical sounding parts of the soundtrack. It sounds similar to Double Back and Casual Loop, which a soft piano. We stand before the person that started all of this, somebody who seem to be important, but in context of replikas production was crucial - the Great Empress. What's she doing here? Why have you deiced to take us to stars? Why have you done nothing after you have been crowned? Who have you wed? And why you killed yourself? Perhaps the longest day was a cycle, similar to the one we are in now, and the wedding its ending. Perhaps there was a love story, of her loving somebody she shouldn't love? Or the one that broke her heart and she wanted them forever and ever, until she could wed them. Only to have them heart being broken again - perhaps there was no love, but only obedience. She couldn't take it no more, and saw herself as monster, pushing others to do what she wanted, even if they didn't want to. Her emotions pulled the Song of the Gods. However, who knows. We have little to base it on, and this interpretation already suffers from overthinking. In Sea Smoke there is longing for things that were, there this nostalgia. There is this faint choir or somebody speaking but its disturbed, like it was... in the past? A mourning perhaps over something or somebody.
Ritual (Nowhere) - same as Ritual before surgery room. Long notes sounds like wind coming from under door. We know what we have to do and we are close to the end... right? It has to be. After all, it is where must be Alina... right?
The Red Gate - We ought to crawl in Nowhere, and we have now learnt to walk to outside. We exit the hole, to which we entered in the beginning. It is like exiting Plato's cave - before we only have been siting memories and shadows, but now, we have exited to see the truth. And similarly to the beginning, must go through the Gate. But here is someone who's waiting for us. Makes me wonder, if he fell here, or perhaps he too had to go through Nowhere. However, he can't go through gate. Perhaps he's afraid that he will learn the truth, so he prefers to remain in the cave, where he can believe in whatever he was made to believe, without fear of founding out truth. Or perhaps he can't, as the only one who was invited was Elster. He reaches for it, but could he? He says he was here before, and that he never came back. And each time perhaps he dies from his wounds, like we see later Elster(s). He want to know what destroyed his Commander, his Falke. Sometimes I wonder, if he really admires her, or is it just a deep demanding feeling he was imprinted in him. But he noticed her changed, and he couldn't gain the same feeling like from before. Perhaps, there was also love between them? Maybe it wasn't just artificial one, but also something that Falke lost beyond the Gate was calling for him. We never hear Falke's thoughts before being 'poisoned' by whatever that lies beyond. I like to think they at least enjoyed each other company. But it also breaks my heart (again). The calm music hints that, perhaps, there is hope. We feel that we are closer.
Die Toteninsel (Emptiness) - Island of the Dead. We walk towards it. The ship in the sea of red sand, surrounded by black rocks. "It doesn't matter", for Elster it never mattered what she finds it there, finding truth was never a goal here. "[Ich] hab kaine angst" - "I have no feaI'm not afraid". The islands appears, a memory to which Elster can't connect - Alina never painted, Alina was with her on the war, Alina... Alina is gone. It still haunts her, but tries anyway. She has to try, she can't go back. But she can't escape it. Finally, Elster understands and breaks (literally). She was never looking for Alina. We learn that all of that was for nothing, that we have achieve nothing, cycle begins again. Elster is filled with her gestalt memories, on who she was, what she wanted and who she loved. But that person is dead, and Elster has to understand that. She has to move on. Music emphasise that, we have this soft piano, but also long notes that gives away us a empty feeling. That we are in vast space, in vast place and we are lost. She is lost... and it ends.
Memory - but who's she looking for? Doesn't matter, she has to ship to check. She wakes up and goes her list.
3000 cycles (I missed you) - "Do you remember now, Elster?" might ask Ariane. "I missed you". Ariane didn't missed some gestalt she found in LSTR's memories. Not a mix between a replika unit and gestalt. She missed her Elster, her Elster. She shows us the best memories, their kiss and their dance. The best thing she can give Elster - something to remember. Now they will play their favourite music and live with the moment... Until she is hit with once again, with familiar signal. It tells us to not be afraid that we failed. Failures are part of self-discovery. That there is somebody that waits for her, not her gestalt her, but her as who she is now. She's not a robot, she's not a replika, she is not a copy of somebody that is long dead - she is she, she is a person. And she made a promise. Our promise, she and Ariane. And now, she has to keep it.
Near Dark by the Pond - it's more a signal than a track. It's for Elster, so she could follow.
Lived in - She made a promise. She has to remember our promise. A long hunting voices sounds like screams, perhaps screams of pain that Ariane made when radiation was taking life from her one by one, teeth by teeth, hair by hair, while keeping her awake, so she could feel it all.
I can't stop now - heavy music, working on machine. While previously it suggested her being endlessly going machine, now it means being remade, reworked. She takes literally takes something from her past mistakes and fix it her. I like to think that Elster lying there is Elster from Memory. That somehow, we also create cycle, so that could next Elster succeed.
Rouge Wave - twisted and changed. We are back. The more intense music feels more like a action music, just before the main action is about to happen. We, and Elster know what has to be done. We no longer go around looking for clues. Now, we are on the mission.
You have changed - it feels cryptic, as we see yet another hole to jump into, but also more sincere. While previous times we might had been hesitate, now we know where to go. I wonder, if that hole was made for us by Ariane, as a way to give us shortcut through Sierpinski. And who has changed? We? Elster? Sierpinski? Adler? Falke? ...Ariane? I think they all could say this to each other.
Cigarette Wife - it feels like a chase music, which is creates interesting comparison to what what is just a elevator music. This is another one with interesting title, to which I have no idea what it connect to. Perhaps is another reference to something I am too stupid to find/see. However, the chase in the music fits great with "I wear no mask". Perhaps Adler finally went through the Gate in this cycle, and now understand why things changes. His losing his face indicates that he had enough of trying to keep it all as things were. They were rip apart and put back, in a way that doesn't match as it was (for him). A kiss he gives Falke leaves me wonder, if Ariane projected on him Elster emotions, and on Falke her? That perhaps they are both (Adler and Falke) caricatures of what Elster and Ariane are. Or perhaps he really had feeling, true feeling for Falke, and she did for him, and in that way, he hopes to wake her up, like a prince that came to princess. But nothing happens. Everything is whole again, and he hates it. He hates how everything was destroyed and rebuild, and in this world, there is no place for him and for Falke. Or perhaps, its about Falke, in which Ariane and Elster memories are stored. She was made whole, but it was gluing mismatched puzzles to each other. She's whole, and she hates it.
Rotfront (Moon) - it's transition. A transformation of Sierpinski into something else, something alien, but now familiar. Ariane helped remember something Elster forgot, now she wants Elster to help Ariane remember what was.
Dream Diary - a soft music on which we feel that we walk over surreal world. This is dream diary (which we later even find to solve a puzzle). We walk through place where Ariane grow up, learned her place in society, and to be more precise - that in society there was no place for her. Once again, music fills us with melancholic and phlegmatic vibes.
Blockwart - it similar to Riot Control but mixed with Kolibri. It is aggressive, hostile and feels dangerous. I have a feeling that it might come from the raid that was done on Itou bookstore. Perhaps the march of Storchs and Kolibris radio waves still haunts Ariane. The fact that she couldn't do anything about it. She didn't know about her abilities back then, and now when she knows about it, she regrets heavily she couldn't save her only friends.
Teeth - Isa... she couldn't go anymore. She couldn't find Erika, she lost any hope. Perhaps there never was Erika to find. Perhaps through vision of Isa, Ariane tried to save her friends. But she couldn't. She couldn't even tell them apart. Music has this very empty, somehow muffled feel to it, a hurtful past that couldn't be altered. That's why we see "Forgive me" - it's from Ariane to Isa and Erika.
Double Back (VHS Ver.) - a closing to the story, we once hear what we heard at the beginning, where there was still hope.
Home - interesting that home is seen by Ariane not the radio station she connected with happy memories, but one with her aunt's home. Their are only two beds, meaning her aunt was only thing she had back there. And her aunt wasn't, I think, bad, as she tried to take care of her. If not counting school, perhaps there were happy memories. From this track there is a feeling of safety and solitude, mixed with some dream-like vibe.
Ariane's Theme - Artefact Ending. I don't think we help her achieve godhood - Ariane never wanted power, nor she wanted to ascend. No, as it requires from us to finish game at least once, it requires from us use outside knowledge and finding hidden keys, this is for us. We jump to Ariane's point of view, missing how Elster beats Falke and we see that her nightmare of loneliness and being left alone ends, and finally, she can have one last dream - of her, Elster and their dance. And above them? Rotfront's eye, a symbol of home, a place where should would love to take Elster with her. And perhaps now, she can, as they both finally finds each other.
Falke's Theme - it is twisted vesrion of Ariane's Theme. Falke is filled with both of their memories, while also losing herself. She doesn't want to be whole, she want to be freed and be herself. I kinda wonder, what are her issues? Perhaps having feelings for someone? And who was donor? While their are modelled after the Great Revolutionary and her Daughter, they weren't the one to give away their neuron patterns.
Become Whole Again - Falke wants to die. She wants to let go of this forced memories. She knows she isn't the one that Ariane loves, but she has the same feelings for her as Elster. She knows she isn't wanted nor she should be, but it still hurts her. The music has the similar elements to other corrupted replikas, mainly the hitting on steel, like she had problem walking, even when she overs in air. It is a battle, but Falke doesn't want to. The Elster part of her personality doesn't allow her to let go Elster, as Elster doesn't want to kill Ariane. And when she fell, she feel like the memories that was kept in her mind leaves. She is whole again, she is herself, the same way Elster is whole her now.
The Promise - Adler awaits us, and while he tries to stop us, it doesn't matter. I think the thing that kept him uncorrupted was that this whole situation kept him invested. Adlers' units needs new Fetish Objects, new fascination to keep themselves invested and entertained. We can see that, that when he wanted a certain fountain pen, he could sacrifice anything to get it. Now, the desire to break the cycle was the one last Fetish Object that kept him sane, something that he couldn't get bored, as it became his obsession. But, when beaten, gives up, similarly to Isa. He can go no longer. And the moment he gives up, corruption gets hold of it, practically turning him on the spot, as reaction for his prolonged resistance. Elster doesn't care, she is here to keep promise.
Crepuscular - "of, relating to, or resembling twilight; dim; indistinct". This is it, all it could take is to go to her and... She can't. It's too much. She put herself to sleep. The cycle has ended, the night come close, she shall sleep, and soon, she will wake up, to try again. She tried to evade pain, so she couldn't now take it. She have Leave. But also, it's Memory. She doesn't remember her, as it's not her. She is still in between, in between being a replika and being her own person. But she made it. And Ariane sees it. It's not Araine who don't remember, it's Elster who lack her full memory.
Troublesome Creak - I... have no memory of it. Honest. But it's tense, and it feels like ending, but I don't remember it? Does somebody know? But it sounds like a dance, a grand ending, filled with emotions.
Warm Light - the cycle has ended. They can move out. They could never be together, not in this world. But also, music indicates hope and catharsis with it soft piano playing, that perhaps in place where they are going, they will be able to love each other, and dance one more time.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAnd this it the end.
Hey you, yes you. Thanks for reading it, if you did. If you didn't... well, I don't blame you! I wouldn't want to read it too haha. It was stuck in my head, and while I don't think I get all this thins right, I'm glad there is a place where I can drop it, even if probably nobody will read it.
There is not much conclusion on the end. What I wanted to say, I said already and I don't think there is much to add here. I saw so much different interpretations of what happens in the game, thoughts and theories, that I think adding my own 'big brain moments' won't change anybody opinion. And honestly, I love this game for that. It's like, perfection of art - it has it's own value, but also changes tone and shape depending not only the person that looks on it, but also what that person wants to find in it.
TL;DR; the author of this post wanted to listen to music and write short thoughts about it but end up overthinking about space lesbians in dystopian sci-fic. The author has nothing on his defence.

Oh my god, links are working on desktop for me now! I can finally put everything in without having to use the app for a workaround, and it is such a relief to be able to have drafts actually ready to go. Now if only they'd add the ability to view/edit/post drafts on the Android version of the app... Although, it would seem the links still won't work before the main body of the post, apparently, so links will now just be at the bottom!
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The next morning, I was one of the first to rise, so I headed out into the field I arrived in for some bodyweight exercises. I started out with a quick five mile run, taking advantage of the still cool air to maintain my endurance. Once the light of the early sun began cresting the city’s walls, I moved to the shade to focus on my back and arms, settling on doing a few sets of push-ups and pull-ups. By the time I finished, the dew had started to evaporate, blanketing the property with a thick layer of fog. For a moment, I wished I still had my phone to capture the picturesque scene, but quickly let the thought pass so as not to dwell on my losses.
As I made my way back to the barracks to take a shower, I was stopped by the instructor who joined me in my memories. He motioned for me to follow him, and I quietly fell in line behind him as we walked to the administrative building. This time, I was led into what appeared to be a meeting room, sporting a long conference table and seating for twenty people. Waiting inside were five other instructors, if the inclusion of the attuned woman from before was any indication. I took my seat opposite the instructors and waited patiently to hear what was to be said, taking deep breaths to keep my nerves under control.
“There’s no need to worry,” assured the man sitting directly across from me. “My advisors and I have been quite busy reviewing the memories you provided. To say there were some… interesting devices would be an understatement, and now I find myself torn. While your magical abilities would have me happily leave you to serve in my army, I feel as though your knowledge of your world could prove to be more of an asset.” With the last sentence, it finally clicked that it was the king in front of me. I reflexively rolled my eyes, already having an idea of where the conversation was headed.
“Let me stop you there, your highness,” I replied bitterly. “If I had to guess, you want the weapons you saw?” I leaned forward on the table, placing my chin in my palm as I stared at the king. “I’m not here to uplift Astema. Hell, it would be foolish of me, even if I wanted to. I don’t even know anything about you, this kingdom, or really any of the rest of the world. Blindly charging into things has been nothing but a disaster for me so far.”
“We will be taking care of your education, as your test scores demonstrated it to be necessary,” one of the others chimed in. I redirected my glare to the one who spoke up, already prepared to fire back.
“Of course, I expected nothing less. But, tell me… does the word ‘propaganda’ translate,” I asked. Immediately, everyone at the table slightly stiffened their posture, and I nodded with a grin. “Yeah, that’s what I thought. That tells me everything I need to know, right there. You see, I don’t actually speak your language, everything is just being automatically translated for me by magic. Of course, that has its limits, and concepts or words that aren’t shared between our worlds don’t translate. Yet, you clearly understood that word, based on your reactions.” I leaned back in my chair, interlacing my fingers as I waited for a reply.
“And what if I were to offer you a way home, should you provide us with these weapons,” asked the king. “Just imagine what could be achieved against the brimspawn if it doesn’t matter what a soldier’s magical affinities were! Healers could work amongst the soldiers on the battlefield and still be safe, fighting from great distances. Artificers could take a more active role in maintaining equipment. Priests could-”
“You don’t realize how terrible of an idea any of that is,” I said, cutting him off before he could imagine any more possibilities. Anger flared in his eyes from my interruption, but I pressed on. “We already have those things where I’m from, and they end up being the primary targets for enemy forces. But don’t just take my word for it. I’m sure I can show you, if you’ll allow it.” Several sets of furrowed brows and looks of intrigue were all I needed, and I attempted to conjure up an illusion with light magic.
It took some tweaking, but eventually I managed to project the insignia of the Red Cross onto the table. Despite the looks of enchantment I received due to the illusion, I quickly decided that silence wouldn’t do my plans any justice. I messed around with trying to produce some sound, and once I figured it out, suggested that we move outside. They hesitantly agreed, and I led them out to where I had initially appeared for the orientation speech. I got many curious looks from other recruits as they knelt for the king while we walked by, but I paid them no mind. Once we were sufficiently far from any prying eyes and ears, I turned to address the group.
“Alright, I’ll explain before we begin, so that I can keep my focus on casting,” I started. “That image I showed you is the symbol used by medical personnel across my world. Healers, as you’d call them. Combat medics were initially required to wear that to indicate their role, but that was quickly phased out. What I’m about to show you is the result of the path you want me to help you take, and whatever you’re imagining, you’re wrong. First will be a battle known as the D-Day Landings, one of the most infamous battles from our second world war. Then, I’ll show you the weapons my nation developed to put an end to the war.”
I got straight to work recreating the scenes I had seen in documentaries and movies, choosing to present it as a first person perspective of a random American soldier among the initial wave of landing craft. The sounds of waves crashing against the boat drowned out the sounds of yelling and vomiting of the other soldiers, as it threatened to capsize. As the boat neared the shore, the sounds of bullets slamming into the hull began to cut through the sounds of the ocean, alongside explosions from landing craft that had the misfortune of running into the mined defensive countermeasures.
Without warning, the boat came to an abrupt stop and the front ramp dropped. In an instant, the soldiers charged forth, with many being mowed down by machine gun fire from enemy fortifications. I spared a glance at my audience to see their reactions, and I was not left disappointed. While the king was attempting to maintain a stoic facade, I could see that they were already about to lose their lunch. I snapped my attention back to the display, as my lapse in focus caused it to falter.
My chosen soldier made a mad dash for cover as the menacing crack of bullets flying too close filled the air, and he dove into a defilade. He looked back as other soldiers desperately tried to drag their friends to safety, only to be killed for their efforts. A nearby explosion rocked the projection, punching me in the chest and breaking my concentration as the king and his entourage visibly flinched. When the pressure from the spell released, I breathed a heavy sigh, not having realized the strain I had been putting on myself.
“Sorry. For some reason, I didn’t expect the sound to actually have an effect there,” I explained. “But I think that’s a good point to stop that particular scene. That’s what guns are capable of, but you should still see where that path leads. I won’t add the sound because that may run the risk of actually hurting us. I’m sure your imagination can fill in the gaps.”
I started my next projection with an aerial view of Nagasaki, using the bare minimum of energy to avoid burning myself out. Despite the lack of sound, I could still tell they were on the edge of their metaphorical seats as the B-52 flew through the air. The group watched intently as the bomb was released from the plane and the parachute quickly deployed. After an agonizing minute full of doubtful questioning, the bomb detonated, causing them to jump back as the shockwave blew a hole in the clouds. I stopped the spell as the mushroom cloud reached its peak, and looked at the king and instructors. They were all staring at the sky in awed silence, likely trying to imagine seeing something like that in person. I gave a minute for everything to sink in before continuing my impromptu lecture.
“That’s called a nuclear bomb.” As I spoke, their eyes snapped back to me. “And that's the second one we dropped on that nation in the span of a week. Everything I showed you happened roughly eighty years ago, and the death toll of those bombs is still debated to this day, but estimates reach nearly two hundred fifty thousand. Just a drop in the bucket compared to the seventy five million that died during the war. Now, tell me, do you really want that to be Astema’s future?”
“No,” the king responded firmly. “I am confused as to how those weapons are in any way similar, though. I will grant you that they both have incredible destructive power, but I don’t understand how one leads to the other.” I nodded, satisfied that I had crushed his desire for Earth weaponry.
“It’s a matter of scale,” I replied. “Guns essentially work by using very small bombs to throw chunks of metal at high speeds. Even our vehicles operated using the same principles. I don’t even know if Astema has the materials needed to make such things, but in the case that it does, I don’t want to be the one responsible for their creation. I may not be a good person, but I do still like to think I’m not evil.”
“Your actions say otherwise,” he jabbed, unable to fully hide his disgust. I reflexively balled my hands into fists, ready to end his reign, but took a few deep breaths to calm myself down instead.
“While that may be true, what good would it do anyone if I doubled down,” I questioned through gritted teeth. “I don’t expect you to even partially understand. Hell, in comparison to Earth, this is a utopia, so I’m sure that you see me as the embodiment of evil. However, that doesn’t mean I didn’t have my reasons. To be fair, though, I’ve received much harsher treatment for much less back home, so I appreciate you allowing me the chance to plead my case instead of executing me on the spot.”
“Don’t mistake that for a statement of your character,” he replied. “Applying existing law to unprecedented circumstances would have been ignorant.”
“Believe me, I know. I’m far from delusional. I doubt I’ll ever meet Astema’s standards for what makes someone good, but that doesn’t mean I can’t or won’t try,” I stated.”Now, I’m not sure how it’s not having an effect on you, but I reek. If there’s nothing else you need from me, I’d like to take a shower.” One instructor’s curiosity got the better of him and he sniffed the air, recoiling from the putrid results of my workout.
“That will be all, you are dismissed,” the king stated before promptly turning and heading back toward his castle. The instructors, in turn, headed back to the admin building, and I made my way to the barracks to clean off. Everyone was already awake by the time I was done with that little meeting, leading the showers to be relatively crowded. Regardless, I stripped down, leaving my robe in the changing room and bringing in my normal clothes to wash with the rest of me.
After a short search, I located a vacant shower head and made my way over, kicking the water on as I got into position. The shock of the cold water staved off the last bit of grogginess left over after my workout, and I fought to not jump out of the stream as it gradually began to warm up. As it reached a good temperature, I stood letting the water pour over my sore muscles for a while, basking in the feeling of relaxation that the shower provided. I began scrubbing away, not wanting to waste too much time standing around, while I contemplated the meeting.
He says he doesn’t want that kind of technology, but how much can I trust that, I asked myself. He’s clearly hungry for some form of extra power, but it’s definitely too early to be making any assumptions as to what exactly he wants it for. It’s one thing to say he wants guns to fight whatever these brimspawn are, but what happens after that? He seems reasonable enough, but he’s still a politician at the end of the day, and their reaction to my concerns about propaganda definitely gives me my doubts. Time will tell, I guess, but I should keep my guard up for the time being.
While I had successfully scared them away from the idea of developing Earth’s weapons, assuming they even had the capabilities, there was no guarantee that the hesitation would be permanent. If people had shown me one thing throughout my life, it was that nothing lasts. Anything could happen to make the king more desperate, and the choice could easily be taken away from me with a few spells. With the supposed changes in how dungeons work, that desperation could come sooner than later, I thought. The king was merely one out of a potentially endless supply of people who could have an interest in making use of my knowledge. Of course, none of that changed my ultimate goal of returning home in one piece, but it did mean I’d likely be walking on eggshells to not make the mistake of giving away too much to the wrong person.
I was pulled from my thoughts by the sudden feeling of eyes drilling into the back of my skull. A quick turn of my head revealed several people staring at me with skeptical expressions, but they quickly shot their gazes to the floor. No longer feeling as though the showers were a good place to do some thinking, I shut off the water, wrung out my clothes, and made my way into the changing room to grab a towel and dry off. Once I was satisfied, I wrapped the towel around my waist and hung my stuff up to dry in one of the cubbies.
I received a few more furtive glances as I walked back to the sleeping quarters, but ignored them as I threw my robe on. Lira, Remir, Cyrol, and Arellon were gathered by the dwarven woman’s bed, chatting away as they finished getting dressed. They saw me walking by, and Arellon waved me over. I happily complied, glad to see some non-prying eyes.
“Hey guys, what’s up,” I asked. The four of them glanced at each other before Lira leaned in with a serious expression painting her usually jovial face.
“Are you a noble in your world?” Caught off guard, I confusedly asked what exactly she meant by that, unsure what would give anyone that impression. “Well, others were saying that they saw you speaking with King Caran as if you’re equals, and he’s only ever given that courtesy to members of noble families.” Remir, Cyrol, and Arellon nodded their agreement, and I couldn’t help but burst out laughing.
“Fuck no,” I responded once I got myself under control. “We don’t even have royalty or nobility where I’m from, at least in most places. There are exceptions, of course, but that’s widely considered to be an incredibly outdated way of doing things. I do, however, have plenty of experience in dealing with people in positions of power, so I guess I’ve become pretty jaded when it comes to those types of interactions.”
“What did he want from you, then,” asked Remir.
“He was shown some of my memories from my psych eval and wanted to know some more about where I’m from,” I replied. Thankfully, my answers seemed to satisfy them, and they visibly relaxed. However, my last comment seemed to spark Lira’s curiosity.
“Speaking of which, you have yet to tell me about your world. What’s it like there,” she asked. I paused for a while, wondering exactly how I would sum up an entire other planet. As many similarities as there were, there were far more things that were entirely alien between the two.
“Well, let me see,” I began. “Like I said when we met, there are only humans there.” That response elicited shocked looks from the others, which I was starting to find funny. “There’s also the fact that magic doesn’t exist there, and there’s zero proof of gods being real.”
“What,” Lira shouted. “How does anyone there function without magic?! What do you do if you get attacked by monsters?” I laughed again at the bewildered response, yet again needing a moment to calm down.
“For one, we don’t have monsters, at least not in the same way Astema does. We mostly just use that word to describe people who commit horrible acts. Stuff like murder, rape, abuse… It pretty much just means someone is evil,” I explained. “As for how we function without magic, it’s pretty easy. We’ve never had magic, so we rely on technology. Of course, it leads to things being much more complicated, like with healing, for example. If I broke my arm here, I could just cast a spell and I’d be good to go again within the same day. Back home, I’d be unable to do much of anything for weeks on end while my arm healed on its own.” All four of their mouths hung open in shocked horror, to which I let out a small chuckle.
“That sounds awful,” exclaimed Cyrol. “I couldn’t imagine having to wait for my burns to be healed on their own.” He inspected his hands, likely contemplating what that experience would be like, and shuddered slightly as he processed the idea.
“I mean, it’s not all that bad when that’s your expectation for your entire life. People just have to be more careful than they are here,” I replied. “And there are plenty of good things to come from having no magic. It really forced us to get creative with problem solving, which led to a lot of really cool innovations, like with how we transport things. Instead of using animals to draw carts and carriages, they are self-propelled, with some kinds of vehicles that are even capable of flying.”
“And that’s not magic,” Lira asked skeptically.
“No, but I can understand why it would seem like it. A lot of stuff there seems like magic if you don’t know how it works. We just have really intelligent people who come along and completely change how we live our lives, from time to time,” I said. “I couldn’t tell you the first thing about how a car actually works, though. Just that they make things a hell of a lot easier, and I miss driving.” Out of the corner of my eye, I spotted a small crowd starting to inch closer, curious about what I had to say. One woman in particular seemed to be working up the courage to speak, so I turned to her and raised my eyebrows, waiting to hear what she had on her mind.
“Would you be able to show us,” she asked sheepishly. “I saw you showing King Caran, but I was too afraid to get a closer look.”
“Sure,” I said with a shrug. I thumbed through my mental catalog of the different cars I had owned, settling on my jet black Hellcat. I brought the memory to life in a less crowded section of the barracks, causing several people to jump back in surprise. I smiled as I made the engine roar to life, scaring even more people than when it appeared. “This was one of my favorites. It wasn’t very practical, but boy, was it fast. I had a great time every time I got behind the wheel.”
Many of the room’s occupants poked and prodded at the illusion, inspecting it with varying levels of awe. I sat back and enjoyed everyone’s fascination as they checked the car out, until I felt the strange tightness and cold from spell casting increase in intensity. The disappearance of the car resulted in most of everyone’s disappointment, but I could tell I was getting into dangerous territory with how much energy I had used up so far that day.
“What all could that thing do,” asked another one of the recruits.
“Just move,” I responded. “But like I said, it was really fast. With a clear, straight path, it could probably cross the entirety of Nakstal in under a minute.”
“Incredible,” he muttered. “That’s even faster than a dragon!” The image of a massive winged lizard standing at the starting line of a drag racing course popped into my head, causing me to sputter and cough in an attempt to hold in my laughter. I wonder how much horsepower a dragon would have, I thought.
“You’re the second person to mention dragons since I got here,” I stated. “I’ve been meaning to ask, where-” At that moment, the door to the barracks swung open, catching everyone off guard as one of the instructors came into view.
“Alright, listen up! It’s your turn for psychological assessments. You,” he said, pointing straight at me. “You’re exempt, as yours has already been done, so you’ll be getting some lessons due to your awful test scores. We can’t have anyone so uneducated in Aziah’s army.” While extremely irritating, the callout was accurate, so I bit my tongue, opting instead to give a quick nod acknowledging the plan. The instructor motioned for me and five of the other recruits to follow him, and we hastily fell in behind him as he walked to the now familiar admin building.
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Man, oh man! Zach really needs to chill out with that attitude. It's like he's got major problems with authority or something... Not exactly the best when it comes to dealing with royalty.
​
Previous Next
Royal Road Ko-Fi

I have just paused the game after finishing the (I think?) final boss in what must be 80 seconds flat with the force gun and contact beam, no upgrades. I’m kind of disappointed with it.
What I’m not telling you though is the 35 (when I started counting anyway) attempts I made at the boss last night with an upgraded line gun, a fully upgraded plasma cutter, upgraded pulse rifle and upgraded detonator.
I backtracked this morning to the last save point, bought around 8 health packs and swapped out the PR+DT for CB+FG on the advice of a friend.
I hate backtracking and consider it a last resort but I am so, so glad I did.
I think that this boss design wasn’t so great. It was really cool and symbolic for Isaac but would’ve suited a late-game mini boss or pre-boss-boss better, especially if the difficulty was turned down a modicum, enemy type changed or most importantly accounted for a broader group of arsenals. I’m playing on survivalist as a first-timer and consider myself a super calm player but I was chanting a mantra of “fuck this game” from the fifteenth death up until the point I turned my console off.
Did anyone else have difficulty with this one? Was this a skill issue? I couldn’t for the life of me finish with what was left in my inventory NATURALLY by the end sequence (1 medium med pack, 1 stasis pack, 8 line racks, 14 PC rounds, 174 PR rounds, 15 det. charges).

Drunken cheers sounded out as Sutor sprawled to the ground, catching himself on flat forearms to absorb the impact. He used the momentum to roll to the side, avoiding his opponent's brutal stomp on the under-swept floorboards, still brown and crusty from older fights' dried blood.
Sutor's roll ended with his heels on the floor, letting him spring up, stepping to the outside by a haymaker thrown by the other man, a squat bruiser wider, but not taller, than he was.
He threw another, and Sutor stepped diagonally forward.
Fingers pressed together, he drove them into the man's underarm.
The bruiser let out a pained, frustrated cry as he twisted back the other way with a hammer fist.
The swing was weak, easily ducked, the muscles driving it resisting the orders they were given to protect from pain.
With the bruiser wide open, Sutor drove the heels of his palm--one-two!--into his opponent's nose, then the side of his slack jaw.
The bruiser stumbled back, landed poorly on the outside of his foot, and Sutor took his chance to swing a callous kick to the inside of that same knee.
His support gone, the bruiser collapsed to that side, and his temple met Sutor's rising knee.
He felt little more than the smug upward twitch of his lips showed. He stepped back, allowing the referee--a generous title--to check and make sure the man was still alive.
He was, evidently, or else the ref would have had something to mutter that was angrier than, "Kicking was a cheap trick," as he helped the slowly recovering man to his shaky feet.
"No rule against it," Sutor grunted. "Besides, you gonna argue with that sound?"
The cheering had already died down since the knockout, but had been replaced by arguments over who owed how much to whom and why, but the crinkle of bills and clink of chips and coins.
The ref glowered at him, but didn't say anything else, freeing Sutor to hop up the crude, mixed-material retaining wall that formed the pit, and onto the betting floor to collect his usual 20% cut.
Sutor leaned back on his chair at the back corner table. He used the position to watch everything else, eyes darting down only to check the denominations of what he's counting. The money came from just about everywhere: on and off world, different materials, symbols he didn't recognize. He'd have a hell of a time at the exchange office. Best he could do tonight was at least organize it all by type.
His vigilance paid off, because he was well aware of it when a bright crimson twi'lek passed another table, plucked a chair from it, and plonked it down, sideways, at his.
"You know," he interrupted exactly as the xeno parted her black-painted lips and let out the beginning of a sound, "I cleared away all the chairs from this table to make it perfectly clear that I didn't want anyone to talk to me."
His hostility seemed utterly lost on her, because she grinned at him as she sat down, pulling her booted foot up onto the seat of the chair to lean her elbow on her knee. "Maybe you shouldn't be so interesting, then," she said cheerily.
He looked her up and down, noted the blaster strapped to her thigh over grey battle-dress uniform pants awfully similar to the ones he'd never given back to the Imperial Army. Then, shamelessly, back to where her cleavage flashed from the plunging neckline of her tight white crop top. Why, he reasoned, would twi'lek dress like that, if not for people to look? Besides, he'd learned at the Academy to keep his eyes on people's center mass, so that he could observe everything else without moving them. Anything perkier he could see was, well, a perk. "So," he observed as he picked up his mug of juri juice, "you're not a whore. Not with biceps and shoulders like that. Not with an open carry weapon, either. What do you want, then?"
If she was offended, she didn't show it. She certainly wasn't offended enough to leave him the hell alone. "Just to see if you'd be interested in a more...stable income." She glanced at the mismatched piles of currency. "Maybe something that all pays the same kind of cash at the same time?"
"Oh, so you're the pimp, then?"
She threw her head back and laughed raucously, her lekku slipping off her shoulder. Still not offended, apparently. "Oh, no, don't get me wrong, you'd do pretty well at that, too, but I was thinking something better suited to those bloody knuckles of yours. You washed outta the Academy a few months back, right?"
Sutor narrowed his eyes. "How the hell do you know about that?"
The twi'lek leaned farther forward. "We keep an eye on the Academy, Sutor Renkin" she said pointedly, grinning widely again. "Lets us know who gets how far before the Empire boots them for not fitting their cookie cutter."
Sutor, finally interested, saved the rest of his count for later. "Who are you, exactly?"
"I represent Vagabond Solutions," she answered. "Name's Ashanti. You wanna fight, right? Make a career outta violence for the Empire? Well, this is how washouts who just barely didn't make the cut do that. You don't gotta work with a regular team, just wait for somebody to point you at something they want killed or blown up. Perfect for someone like you who doesn't play nice with others. Pay's good, too. How's that sound?"
Sutor thought for a moment, drained his mug, and thumped it back down onto the table, wiping foam from his mouth with the back of his hand. "Sounds better than this," he allowed. "When do I start?"
Ashanti sidestepped off the chair and orbited the table to stick her hand out to him. "Right now, if you want! Call it a working interview, cuz I just so happen to be on my way to killin' people and breakin' stuff."
Sutor eyed her hand, then took and squeezed it. "Help me finish counting and I'm in."
Ashanti laughed.
The first job was far less engaging than Sutor had hoped. Rather than hopping into a star destroyer and smashing their way into some Rebel Alliance installation, it saw him and Ashanti not even leaving Kor Vella, let alone Corellia, and instead sitting in a speeder to get to the other side of the bad section of town, only to ditch the vehicle and continue on foot for another couple of hours.
The twi'lek had first given him a ride back to his dirt-cheap apartment, making some snide, if not inaccurate, comments about it as she'd waited for him to retrieve the E-11--which he'd also "accidentally" neglected to return--to give himself better stopping power than the combat knife and modified Defender pistol he usually kept on him.
He ended up sitting with her in the mouth of an alley, looking across the street at a run-down old warehouse. "Kind of cliché, isn't it?" he muttered eventually.
"Rebel scum aren't known for their creativity," Ashanti chuckled. "Makes our job easier, though."
"Why can't the Army take care of this themselves? It's not like we don't have a base within striking distance. Or, hell, we could turn one of our star destroyer's guns around and wipe the place out in a couple shits."
Ashanti's lips tightened into a straight line. "I think that's another problem of yours, Sutor," she said as she brought her binoculars to her eyes. "You're not good at seeing the big picture." When Sutor only stared, she peeked out from the eye pieces, then sighed. "It's not gonna look good on the Empire to shell one of its own planets, and Corellia's relationship with them is rocky as is. Plus, it'd be real embarrassing to admit the Rebels got a foothold here."
"Isn't that what the shadowtroopers are for?"
Ashanti shook her head. "Too important, not enough of 'em. The Empire doesn't want to waste its special boys on things like this. That's what we're for. We things that the army and the stormtroopers aren't good enough for, and what the elite forces are too good for. Make sense?"
Sutor nodded, then noticed something. Flipping his scope up over the sights of his rifle, he peered through it, drawing a bead on one corner of the warehouse.
"What'd you see?" Ashanti hissed, lowering herself slowly as she turned her binoculars on the same spot.
"Nothing yet. I...wait. There. By the back door. Brown shirt, green pants, boots, black ballcap. That bag's too big for him to be a civilian, and he's put together too well to be homeless. He's definitely here on purpose."
"Damn," Ashanti muttered. "Good eye."
Sutor shrugged. "So what now?" he asked, flicking his weapon's safety to semiautomatic in anticipation of the fight.
"Now," Ashanti said, opening the big backpack she'd brought with them, her lekku twining delicately around each other--motions that Sutor followed closely--into an imitation of a ponytail, "we suit up and smash down."
From their response, the Rebels clearly didn't at all expect any visitors. Certainly not the kind who looked like he and Ashanti did.
They crashed in through the wall, breached by cable explosives, head to toe in dark armor, light but effective against the blaster pistol bolts thrown at them.
Sutor could just barely hear the cooling fans built into the helmet. The sound of battle overrode it. His E-11 screamed higher powered bolts out at running Rebels trying desperately to reach the rack of blaster rifles in the back, and the return fire screeched as it glanced off his plates.
Through the T-shaped visor, clearly Mandalorian-inspired, he saw Ashanti step behind a support column as small chunks of concrete burst of of it, only to spin around to the other side and take down the offending enemy.
Sutor felt himself grinning. Finally, real combat, he thought gleefully, even moreso when he noticed someone outflanking him, ducked just a hair before they fired, then charged him down, letting his rifle dangle from his shoulder by its sling as he slammed an open hand around his throat, and pulled his knife to plunge it into the Rebel's gut and chest again and again until he stopped moving.
The skirmish proceeded just like that for the next half hour, him and Ashanti moving constantly to maintain the disorganized enemy's confusion, using suppressive fire to cut them off from the weapons powerful enough to pierce their armor, and being brutally terrifying as they did it, send no few of the enemy combatants into quivering shock.
These, the pair left alone save for a well-placed strike with a boot or rifle butt to the head. The rest, they slaughtered.
As Sutor and Ashanti were binding the wrists of their half-dozen prisoners behind their backs, however, one of them spun and clocked Sutor in the side of the head, hard enough to knock it aside and disorient him for a moment.
A moment long enough for the Rebel to pull a pistol from a cross-draw holster hidden under her vest and aim it at Ashanti.
She smirked, and Sutor felt the same sentiment. "Oh, please, you saw how useless your pistols are. What do you expe--"
Both were rattled once again as a noise louder than a blaster roared from the gun, a flash of white fire erupting from the muzzle.
As Sutor's ears rang, he saw Ashanti jerked away with an agonized cry, holding her shoulder, now exposed through the shattered remains of her plastoid pauldron.
The Rebel turned her weapon on Sutor, but he grabbed her wrist and ducked, pushing the weapon to point straight up as it let out its barking cry a second time.
His knife flashed out, and the woman fell with a cut throat.
Sutor took no chances, snatching the weapon from her lifeless hand. "What the hell is this?"
Ashanti grunted, reminding Sutor that she needed medical attention--it wouldn't affect his new job prospect well if his interviewer died--so he pulled gauze from his small emergency medkit and went to start stuffing her wound with it.
She stopped him, however. "Didn't go through," she said through clenched teeth. "Projectile's still inside. Dig it out first."
Sutor grimaced. He had some field medical training, but... With a grimace and shake of his head, he pulled a scalpel and a small pair of foreceps from the kit, and began to work.
"What kind of blaster does this?" he asked, trying to keep her talking to distract her from the pain.
She still spoke slowly, controlled, not letting her tongue pass her teeth, giving a slur and a lisp to her speech. "Nodda brashter," she answered. "Schlughfrower."
Sutor's brow furrowed, then he winced at the same time as she did when he cut a piece of tissue out of the way of his helmet-mounted light. "Slugthrower?" He finally found the projectile, a glistening, mushroomed shape with shards glittering around it.
Ashanti nodded, squeezing her eyelids as the foreceps slowly pulled the fragments free. "Prashtoid'z baddat pruddektin fr'm...quick impagt. Guddat prashzma."
"Good for getting through ray-shielding, too, I bet."
She nodded, then groaned as Sutor wedged the arms of the foreceps around the edges of the main body of the projectile.
He stopped once he had a good grip, then pulled one of his gloves off with his teeth. "Bite this," he instructed, pushing forward the rubberized palm.
She bit.
He yanked.
She screamed.
The projectile clattered to the bloody floor, and Sutor crammed the wound full of gauze before it could bleed any more.
"Why would they have these?" Sutor asked as he started pulling the shards of plastoid plate free, then started cutting into the body glove underneath. "Seems to me like spies would want information, not to kill."
"Vader."
Sutor paused in unrolling a bandage, and turned wide eyes on her. "What? He's real, then?"
Ashanti laughed. "What backwater world did you come from, Renkin?"
Sutor flushed. "...Naboo," he muttered.
"Eugh, with the gungans? No wonder."
"Shut up," Sutor growled, making her wince again as he yanked the bandage tight around her shoulder.
"Tssssss...! That's fair. Yeah, he's real. Not only that..." She glanced at the Rebel prisoners, then lowered her voice. "What I'm about to tell you is...sensitive." Sutor leaned in, the better to hear her. "Vader is a Sith."
Sutor let out a disbelieving guffaw as he pulled back. "You don't believe in that nonse--"
She grabbed him by the breastplate and yanked him back in. "I've seen him. Pull his lightsaber, red as blood. cut through enemy flesh and armored vehicles like they weren't there. Seen him flick his wrist at an oncoming speeder and watched it flip over his head and crash into a wall. Deflect blaster bolts." Sutor stared, mouth agape. "But if they have those slugthrowers, and he cuts one of their bullets out of the air, it'll melt, spray him with molten lead. And he's coming this week to escort the Emperor. This cell was planning an assassination attempt, I'm sure of it."
She finally let go, and he slowly stood. "We'll have to interrogate them as soon as possible, then."
"Agreed. I'll call in backup."

 Chapter 1 A cold body in a hot town tonight. 

As cool winds blew down the main dusty streets in Ash Nevada, the sounds of song, cheer, and poker playing could be heard from the painted nose saloon. Inside the painted nose, local Miner’s of different races laughed, drank,and played cards. Madam Lilith Von Emrick, The beautiful pale skinned Madam, was on the second floor walkway keeping a safe eye on her working girls of the evening. She had black hair with purple stripes done up with curls and a bun, with a black rose clipped to the back of it. Her Sparkling blue eyes are ever at the ready watching the bar below her. Her ladie’s of the evening Flirting and singing with the local drunkards who had a good day prospecting. Behind the bar was Gar'rok the Orc owner of the saloon, he had a nice thing going for him, see Gar’rok wasn’t your typical Orc brute, he was a businessman through and through. He would let Madam Emrick and her ladies stay up stairs in their own rooms for a certain percentage of what the Madam and her girls brought in, then the girl’s would get the patrons to drink which brought more revenue, then still rent the girl’s rooms to the John’s. Yea Gar’rok had it made as far as the whole “working hard, or hardly working” scenario went. The piano was placed next to the bar that played magically by itself, all one would do is whisper a certain song or tune and it would play it without missing a beat. Outside the sounds of crickets and the coyotes serenading each other from out in the plains were drowned out by the commotion from within the saloon. The moon hung high in the twinkling night sky giving off enough light to see the road ahead of your eyes. A white and brown spotted saddle horse came walking into town, on top of the horse the town sheriff John Kutter, hanging over on his belly dead. A gray chert knife with a deer antler handle decorated with elaborate carvings and purple and green beads stuck in his back. The horse instinctively paced down mainstreet straight to the sheriff’s office. A drunken Dwarf staggered over to what his inebriated mind considers to be a new friend. “Wha..what are you doing out here my frie..hiccup...my friend?. You know that..burp!..pigged nosed Gar...Gar...Gar’rok kicked me out, said he was cut’in me off, HA! jokes on him, ``I've got another bottle at the house, care to join?” as the Dwarven Minor went to pat the horse’s back, that’s when he finally realized someone was on the horse. Once the Dwarf’s brown eyes followed his hand up, knocking the sheriff’s hat off his head. “What in the blazing stampede?” A confused look emerged from his drunken face that twizted in to pure terror once he realized who it was, he quickly ran into the saloon. “THE SHERIFF IS DEAD!” yelled the short winded inebriated dwarf. The entire building went silent except the enchanted piano that still played. “Ou...Outside!” he said windedly. As everyone went out to the main street they all met with gasps of disbelief and sorrow. The moon beamed down its shaded light upon the musical quartet of crickets as they chirped along to their own tune. The Sheriff’s son Butch Kutter laid in bed fast asleep. His Log cabin home wasn’t that big. It had one bedroom, small kitchen with a cast iron stove that helped keep the place warm as the heating furnace during the winter months shared the living room with a three cushion buffalo skinned couch and matching stagecoach rocking chair next the stone fireplace. Small knocking raps sounded by the front door of the log house, But to no avail, the small raps only landed on sleeping ears. More and more small knocks kept going, but they where to low to be heard by a sleeping Butch. Finally a loud brass bell broke the night silence. Butch’s eyes darted up as he sat straight up, instictavly went for his six shooter’s that were hulstered to his gun belt that was hanging from his bed post. Slowly standing up from his bed trying not to make any noise as he cautiously moved from his room to the front door. Cocking his revolvers he looked through a crack in the curtin facing the front porch. As he peered out he realized who it was. “I’m coming, I’m coming” said butch in a groggy crackling voice. When he opened up the front door, he uncocked his pistols. seeing the town's barber standing there. holding his bowler by the brim, sticking the small brass hand bell in his jacket pocket, which many gnome’s carried for instance just like this. Looking down at his feet in sadness. It was Jibs the town Barber (as well as other trades). A three foot tall Gnome with a long white beard, and bushy eyebrows. “Jibs?” Butch answered as he opened the door. “What in the name of Jane's Plain are you doing here this time of night? You know I almost blew your whisker’s off ” Jibs looked up from his pointed leather boots, tears rolling down his ruby red cheeks from his arctic blue eyes. “I’m sorry Butch, it’s your Paw” answered Jibs. “He’s, he’s.” The words that tried to come out of jib’s mouth sounded like a scratched phonograph. “Well, what happened to my paw?” damanded Butch. “ He’s been murdered.” finally spit out Jibs. A blank numbness went through him as a paralyzing shock erupted from butch’s core,he heard the words coming out of Jib’s mouth, but to Butch his brain couldn’t connect the dots, as if Jibs was speaking another language underwater. The entire world seemed to have stopped, Jib’s voice was drowned out into eco’s by a loud ringing in his ears. It took Butch a few seconds, which felt like a few minutes to snap back to reality, “Uh...wh..what?” Butch finally replied as if he knew what jib’s said, but couldn’t translate it in his head. “His horse came into town with him flopped over his saddle,” explained Jibs. “With a chert stuck in his back.” “A chert?” exclaimed Butch in disbelief. “Hurry and get dressed, the body is already on ice in town, we think it was the Eru n’ur.” raw emotion ran through his veins like a steam engine's coil. “Come in while I get dressed.” He gathered his thoughts still in disbelive, and fighting back tears, Butch never like to cry especally infront of people, it wasn’t a macho thing he just didn’t like it. speaking out from the room in a chocked up breaking voice, “But we’ve had a peace treaty with them since I can remember, those elves have always been a peaceful tribe, what reason would they have to murder my dad, let alone break the treaty?” “I don’t know but folks back in town are talking about starting a mob up” “tell me exactly what happened Jibs” said Butch in a stern and pissed off voice. While Jibs explained about his father being found dead on his horse, Butch was changing clothes, he quickly but a pair of blue jeans on, an oval shaped metal belt buckle with seven silver circle’s of the flower of life symble engraved on it, a white button up shirt with the sleeves already rolled up to the elbow’s, brown leather vest, a pair of red cotton socks, brown leather boots, and his lucky black cowboy hat with an “ABRACADABRA” hat band charm wrapped tight around the band, then finally wraping his gun belt with two worn down Rose Wood handled six shooter’s. Butch and Jibs Arrived into town, Butch raced in on his black stallion named stead, while Jibs rode in a custome small four wheeled vehicle that ran off a steam engine. Steam engines have always been a favorite fascination with Gnomes, mostly being able to travel vast distances over a shorter amount of time. It had four wheel’s made out of metal hoops with 20 spokes, a black metal tray was connected to it on top of the two axel’s, with a padded 2 person bench seat (that's if the 2 people where gnome sized or smaller), on the back you can see the actual workings of the engine itself, from the coal burning furnace connected to a boiler, which had metal pipes that lead to the piston’s moving up and down in unison. A true marvel, and one of Jib’s most prized possessions. Everyone in town was gathered at the courthouse, the news of the sheriff’s death spread like dust throughout Ash. Anger, sadness, drunken rage, all filled the atmosphere. Elven slurs could be heard from here and there, followed by death threats. Adrenaline still pumping through his veins from the horse ride, Butch jumped off his horse walking dead in to the court house. There in the middle of the small courtroom in a pine wooden coffin laying down on a tub of ice was his father, sheriff John Kutter. His color had already left his face, and left it a pale blue color. His hands and arms were crossed down by his waist with his hat grasped by his hand. Every step seemed like a mile, a slow stomach sickening mile. As he walked in everyone he passed went to extend their hand and offered their condolences but they were all blind to him walking straight past them as he made a beeline to his father’s cold dead corpse. He tried his damnedest not to cry no matter how hard it was, but the second his blue eyes laid upon his late father in that old pine coffin his knees went weak, a strike in the gut hit him harder than a mule with brass knuckles. His knees hit the ground and his tears exploded from his eyes. The heels of his palms dug into his eye sockets as he gasped for air, cries of pure hate and anger burned through his mind followed by revenge. There was a moment of silence with everyone bowing their heads. Butch leaning over his father’s corpse, cryies of sadness, and rage spewing from him. A warm hand was felt on his back slowly sliding up and down. A blurry image came through as he looked up through the teary cracks of his eyes. It was Eden Cronholm a Tiefling, the town’s schoolmarm. The sweet smell of her lavender perfume was a welcoming invite compared to the stale smell of tobacco smoke that had seemed to have infused into the walls of the courthouse. Once he realized who it was, a quick wipe of the eye’s and a clear of his voice he stood up quickly to meet her eyes. She opened up her arms and warmly embraced him. “It’s okay, let it out.” she said. “I’ll be fine.” replied Butch in stern voice. “I’ll find who did this….I’ll….” His rage blocked him from thinking of any plan he would or could do. “You’ll do what exactly?” Interrupted Eden while Butch was trying to put two thoughts together. “Anger doesn’t solve anything, it build’s nothing, and destroys everything.” at this point both Eden and Butch where both standing up straight up looking at each other, even though her horns made it look like they where the same size, Butch still had to look down to meet her eye’s. Her eye’s were a golden red that almost erupted when she was mad. She had a tail that was about 3 foot long that always seemed to elegantly flow behind her under her pink and white flowered dress, even though stranger’s would mistake her as just another Tiefling, she was always a Lady first. “I’m going to find the pointed ear tree thumper who did this, and may the gods help the village if I don't stop there.” “How do you know for sure it was the Eru n’ur?” Eden snapped back. “Because of this!” A booming voice broke through their conversation. It was Gar’rak the Owner or the Painted Nose. Gar’rak was a 6 '6 Orc with long black dreaded hair pulled back in a ponytail, black mutton chops that came down to the corners of his mouth, and a shiny gold nose ring that dangled from his septum. Gar’rak showed the chert that was found in his father’s back. Still fresh blood on the stone blade and it had already begun to stain the handle. Each elven tribe had their own different colors to help differentiate them, for example the M’an n’ur (Spirit People) tribe is gray and black, and the Radag n’ur (Animal People) is red and brown, and they proudly display their colors on everything they make. Since the chert was decorated in purple and green, those were the Eru n’ur (The one people) colors. “That's a damn Eru n’ur chert if i have ever seen one.” Gar’rak said has he handed the murder weapon to Butch. As Butch inspected it, the green wrapped handle, and purple beads tied to it, the intricate symbols on the deer anter handle, as if it almost told a story. The edge of the chipped away stone blade almost as sharp as a razor. As sure as it looked like an Eru n’ur, chert it was. It felt as if all the townspeople had arrived and were either sitting in the courtroom benches, or standing against the wall, either in silence or murmuring to each other. A loud banging from the back of the room, as everyone looked around for the source, Delle, a female Dwarf and owner of the local general store made her way to the center of the room hitting her elemental staff on the floor as loud as she could to get everyone’s attention. She had long red curly hair that she always kept in a tight bun on top of her head. She wore slightly stained blue jean overall’s with a tan button up blouse, As well as dirty old black steel toe boots. By the time Delle made her way to the center of the room standing next to Sheriff John’s coffin, she had already had everyone’s attention. Her brown eyes tried to catch everyone as she spun around the room. “Our peace treaty with the Eru n’ur has been broken, broken with a Chert in the back.” She took the stone blade out of Butch’s hand and stuck it in the air for all too see. “Our good Sheriff has been murdered, murdered by the long fingered hands of those slant eye’s savages.” a low cheer of “here, here’s” came from within the crowd. “We need to unite everyone, every gun, every wand, and every muscle, and retaliate.” a louder cheer erupted this time. “It wasn’t them!” A voice cried out over everyone. Eden Cronholm rushed past everyone making her way through the murderous crowd’s attention. “It wasn’t them” cried Eden again. “Then who was it?” Demanded Delle, her hazel eyes piercing at the Schoolmarm. “It couldn’t have been the Eru n’ur, I go over there twice a week and teach, they are kind and peace loving people.” expelled Eden “Then explain the chert.” Delle’s nose started to flare, the tip of her nose hairs poking out. “I don’t know.” Eden replied back wishing she had the answer. “We need to act now!” proclaimed Delle. Everyone except for Butch and Eden verbally rallied behind her. As everyone left the courthouse following Delle’s verbal lead, Butch looked down one last time at his late father. The bluish tone of his skin. Memories flashed back from his childhood, the feelings flooded back of how proud he was of his father, seeing him help everyone one no matter who they were, and that how as a child he thought his father was bullet proof, that only death itself could only have the gull’s enough to take his father on. But there he was the honorable Sheriff John Kutter, dead in his coffin on ice. His eyes caught the shinny glissen of his brass star still pinned to his shirt. “You have to stop this.” pleaded Eden. “You know he wasn’t murdered by the Eru n’ur.” Butch took a long look at it, as if he was in a tranch. “Butch, Butch.” Eden finally shook him by the shoulder’s and he finally answered her. “It’s out of my hands now Eden.” He answered back in a mono tone as if he was still in the trance. “Butch you gotta do…” But Butch interupted “You know Eden my paw never raised me to start shit, but you can sure as shit bet he did raise me to finish it.” He reached down into his father’s casket undid the gun belt and holsters of his father’s body. As he quickly dropped his gun belt and holter’s, wrapping around his father’s belt and holsters around his waist. “And I’m going to finish what those two faced savages just started,” walking towards the courthouse door, pleas from Eden muffled into silence as he unholstered his father’s pearl handled Colt revolvers checking the cylinder’s were loaded. As he stepped outside everyone was loading up their horse’s and various steam powered vehicles. A loud bang erupted from the courthouse steps, which spooked some horse’s. Everyone looked back at the courthouse, all their face’s went to pure astonishment. Butch standing there wearing his father’s unmistakeable pearl handled Colt on his sides. “Now did I get everyone’s attention?” asked Butch in a loud and demanding tone. “What we need is ammo and a lot of it” everyone erupted in a small cheer of agreement. A small red flare shot out in the middle of the crowd as everyone backed away from that spot, it was Delle with her staff pointing it up in the air. “All ammo, guns, wands, and staff’s are half off tonight only.” even more cheer erupted from that. With an unknown voice yelling in the background. “Quick to the General Store!'' Everyone raced to the store. Once at the store Delle had to fight her way to the front of the crowd slamming her staff down hard to make people move out of the way. As she finally made it to the front entrance she shot off another small flare from her staff. She wanted to make it clear to everyone. “Before I even get the key out to unlock my shop, here's a few ground rules.” Everyone shut up, not even daring to breathe loud, then again she always had a way to silence people without saying one word. “Rule 1:.” she commanded. “Everyone will stand in a single file line while checking out. Rule 2: only two weapons per person, two firearms, two magical weapons be it wands or staff’s, or one of both, rule 3: two boxes of ammo per person, and don’t worry if you don’t have the money I’m starting up a tab on everyone here, so once your tallied up sign or put your mark right next to it in the book, which brings me to rule 4: don’t make me have to chase you down after your tab, if you have any problems with these rules then you can take it up with my boomstick, am i understood?” They all in unison shook their heads at Delle. With one final glance at everyone she turned around saying in an unnatural pleasant voice “the Ash Nevada General Store is now open, everyone please one at a time.” While everyone walked in and started to look around, Delle went around the store room lighting wall lamps, as more and more laps lit the more it started to feel almost like Christmas to the town mob. The store looked pretty much like your ordinary general store, the shelves stocked with different living supplies, food, laundry detergent, cooking ware, etc, As well as different tool’s, mosty for mining, in fact many of the items in her shop were also enchanted as well such as an always heated clothing iron that automatically heated itself once it touched the clothing. Then you came to the weapons section which consisted of a nice range of both firearms and magical weapons such as revolvers, and rifles of different calibers, elemental staves that are powered by one of the different natural elements, and different types of wands used for more precise magic. The Gnomes all gathered around the wands drooling with their eyes on which new wand they could now afford, being small, and weak wands were their preferred choice. The Orc’s gathered around the rifles, Orc’s being pure brutes at heart prefer something with a little more kick, such as enchanted rifles so they can get the best of both worlds. The Dwarf’s were huddled around with the orcs looking at the rifles and elemental staves, discussing which elements would be better. The Halflings were mixed with the gnomes looking at the wands and pistols. While the humans were mixed in all the crowds. Everyone rushed to get their gear and lined up like bee’s to ants at the register signing or marking their tabs. Butch wasn’t planning on getting anything but thought he would look around for abit. When a 6” water element staff caught his eye. It was beautifully decorated with carvings of a “Z” and two lines going down it and a bright blue sapphire gem adorned the top. As he reached for the staff his eyes were fixated on the blue sapphire. The blue gem sparkled as the flickering lights of the wall mounted lamps seem to dance around it. Delle’s voice finally broke the spell. “You know the old saying is, sometimes the gem pick’s you.” His eyes broke away to Delle who seemed to appear behind him. “ I’m sorry Delle? “ I seen you eye stabb’in that staff, here sign the book and you can pay me later, honestly your the only one here I do trust.” “Now that I do Believe.” Butch replied With a smirk. he headed over to the large green book with ink and quil that had already had the tally for the water staff where he signed it. After everyone finished with their quick shopping spree waited outside, Butch walked outside with two box’s of .36 Cal bullets, and his new water staff strapped to his back. As he stepped down the wooden porch to the dirt road. Everyone seemed to go silent, and parted a path as he walked through the crowd to his horse. Butch looked around at everyone there who was watching him. “Well are we going to get this ‘whoo ha’ or ya’ll just going to stand there and keep looking pretty?” Snapped Butch. Gar’rok stepped out of the crowd toward him. “There’s just one last thing...Sheriff.” Butch’s eyebrow cocked up unsure what Gar’rok had just said. Gar’rok pinned his late father’s brass star on his brown leather vest. Butch looked down as Gar’rok pinned it on. “We...as a town where talking Butch” said Delle we can’t think of anyone else to have as our sheriff. For that split second his rock hard heart seemed to crack. “Hmmhmm.” Butch cleared his throat and turned around looking at everyone with a tear roling down his cheek. “I can’t tell ya’ll I will be as great as my father was, hell I don’t think I will or can even measure up to him. But what I can tell you is I will do my damnedest to serve and protect our fine town, and each and everyone of you.” A loud applause erupted. “Now lets ride.” Everyone got on their preferred means of transportation and headed out toward the Elven Reservation.

After getting roasted on Casters Casual Friday stream for my female god design post, I remembered I was supposed to make one for male gods too. WARNING, THIS IS ANOTHER LOOOOOOOOOOONG POST. So without further ado (this is in god release order just as the female one):

• Agni. Rather simple design. He is on fire, he has two heads, he has pants that indicate where he is from. You could do more with the concept but design is not bad. Better than the normal "regular looking guy with two heads on fire" depictions of him.
  
• Anubis. First of these guys here so let me get right to it. Hirezs decision how to do egyptian gods was an interesting one. Most common depictions of these guys is generally a normal human body with an animal head, a jackal in Anubis' case. Smite went a bit further making the body humanoid in shape but giving them a lot of animalistic featuers, like semblance of fur and jackalfeet for Anubis. For pure visual side, it looks good. But there should be consistency amongst Egyptians, especially female gods deviate from this style a lot. And then we have stuff like Geb who is just a walking rock, nothing humanoid about him. Just from design point of view, its good but Egyptian pantheon as a whole lacks consistency.
  
• Hades. I know a lot of people think he doesnt look anything like Hades should look like. And I half-agree, he looks way more "evil" than Hades is supposed to be. But I still take this (and especially his old model) over the usual "old man with big beard" greek god visual. It looks cool, even if it doesn't depict what Hades is supposed to be and look like at all. At least there some soul theming in his abilities.
  
• He Bo. Another quite basic design, his remodel is pretty interesting. He went from old dude to this. Design is not terrible but theres a lot of weird choices, like those spike hands. Still, he does convey what he is, a water god, very well. I bet if he was remodeled, they would change him a lot but as he is now, its not too bad.
  
• Hun Batz. Definitely had never heard of this guy before Smite. And even while researching, can barely find anything about him. He look mayan, he looks like a howler monkey so design is okay. Needs a texture update badly tho, Smite 2 should fix that part.
  
• Kukulkan. To all you og Ao Kuang lovers, don't @ me. But I prefer the mayan worm over the chinese dragon. His original design is very outdated and the model looks terrible. As for our current feathery wyrm, design is very basic and doesn't take any risks but does convey who he is very well.
  
• Odin. As with a lot of the older designs in Smite, it's quite basic but does its job well. Just by looking at him, you can quite easily tell who he is and where he is from. Could use a bit more raven motifs on the actual model but its incorporated to his kit instead. Not sure what the things on his back are supposed to be, look a bit awkward and impractical. New model looks a lot better than the OG.
  
• Ra. Same thing as with Anubis when it comes to whole egyptian thing. But as they are, Ras model is pretty good, another simple yet effective design. Has the sun disk on his chest very visible, can't forget to include that one. Has much more humanlike body than Anubis, again coming to that lack of consistency.
  
• Sobek. One of the more recent remodels. And they did very good job with it. Another egyptian, this time even less humanlike than Anubis, is basically just a crocodile walking on two legs, slightly humanoidified proportions. But for what it is, it looks cool, the new armor has some detail to it and it conveys who he is very well and his protective nature with the passive too.
  
• Vamana. I personally prefer his old model but only for the comedic value since it looked so dumb. Although to be fair, it looked quite close to a lot of his depictions but have to keep in mind, a lot of those pictures are old af. From objective point of view, his remodel looks a lot better and you can still clearly tell from which part of the world he is from, at least from the looks (in nowhere in this post will I get into skin colors of the gods, this is just about visual design).
  
• Ymir. Another remodeled god, a lot of og beta gods did get one. Not much to say about him. He is a giant (in Smites grand scheme, he was one of the biggest models before gods like Jorm or Cthu), he is made of ice, he has norse symbols in his belt and mallet. Simple but effective.
  
• Zeus. The old, buff, bearded guy in a toga with a lightning bolt. You chould show him to anyone in the world and they would probably know who he is. It's not very imaginative design but it's Zeus. Recognizability is more important than artistic freedom in this case.
  
• Guan Yu. Still keeping with the remodeled gods. I do not miss the redfaced old model (I didn't play during it but you get my point). His design again is not very imaginative, basically the same as you see in tons of other media but thats kinda expected with a decently well known figure like Guan. A bit shame that they gave him this kinda ult, would've been a perfect fit to Lu Bu if they ever decide to bring him over. But as for Guan, it looks as it should and adds recognizability to the game so good design.
  
• Bakasura. Would you know, another remodel. And another needed one, old one looks terrible. One of the more random picks to add into the game, Bakasura is definitely not very known entity. I don't particularly like the Baraka handblade design but it fits his kit and the mouth in his chest definitely fits the "Great Devourer" title. He is supposed to be demonic entity (or rakshasa more specifically) and he definitely fits that. I guess this is one of the more imaginative design choices, especially from the older days of Smite.
  
• Anhur. Getting back to egyptians, we are back to highly anthropomorphized animals, closer to Anubis than Sobek. Definitely humanoid proportions but with a lot of fur and lion feet. Design is okay for what it is, definitely needs texture update. One of the lesser known egyptian deities, a lot of depictions I can find are just a dude, not even with lion head. But the choice Hirez went with, definitely makes him one of the furry favorites of Smite. And he is very iconic in Smite, one could say he is the most iconic hunter in the game, being the second hunter added.
  
• Cupid. And third hunter added is another iconic design. That doesn't definitely make it a good one, people call him a "tumorhead" for a reason. Choice to make Cupid look like a generic cherub is definitely a choice, makes him more recognizable but I don't think a lot of people would be mad if he was made to look a bit more like a human. He was often depicted as a child, not a half of one.
  
• Thor. One could he say he IS Smite. The OG posterboy. Holds the most name recognition in the whole game (thank you Marvel) and has to look the part. Hammer is bigger than you would expect but they clearly went with it being extremely noticeable. Theres definitely stuff you could do to upgrade his model but you can't touch the hammer. It's too iconic. The mmo shoulder pads can go and armor could be more detailed. We'll see what they do in Smite 2.
  
• Ares. His remodel made him look really awesome. The spartan helmet, massive shield with fire, armor in general. I don't know about the sword, the random spikes along the blade look weird but otherwise it looks cool. Another very recognizable god done well.
  
• Loki. Another god that got way more name recognition thanks to Marvel movies. And I do think those affected partially his remodeling, especially the horns. He looks way more sinister and intimidating in his current model but old model I feel like fit his trickster side way better, even though it looked quite silly and had impractical back thingies for no reason.
  
• Bacchus. Back to basics, (drunk) fat man in roman clothing, with huge jug of wine, a massive chunk of meat and grapevines in his hair. Sums up perfectly what Bacchus is supposed to be. A remodel that I do think didn't change that much, just updated it to looking more modern design than his old one.
  
• Xbalanque. Theres not too much lore found on a lot of mayan deities. All I could scrounge up that relates to his design, are the jaguar motif which can reference either his names possible meaning "Jaguar Sun" or one possible depiction where he and his twin brother Hunahpu where shown as were-jaguars, his blowgun which is a direct reference to him and his brother using those as weapons and his idle animation where he starts playing with a ball, referencing him and his brother beating the lords of the underworlds (Xibalba) in a game of old mayan ballgame. So the design does well to include all that, especially when its a very obscure and not well-known god.
  
• Hercules. I personally think he needs a full remodel. Only good part of his current design is the addition of Nemean Lions hide on his shoulder, otherwise his design is very bland and could be improved a lot. Also, his proportions are so bad, which is referenced by the Derpules skin.
  
• Vulcan. The Smith of the Gods. I think making him having mechanical body parts conveys decently well his skill behind the anvil. Its a very basic video game character design choice but I feel like it works here. The...what even are those things on his back? Exhausts? Whatever they are, they look a bit weird but they do have animation purpose since he launches his ult from those so it makes sense in that way. His basics do look very weird tho.
  
• Poseidon. I hate his remodel. Old one looked outdated, sure but at least it had something more unique going for it. With color choices and oceanic parts on his body. Instead of this current "old greek guy cosplaying as Ariels father" looking thing we have now. Very boring.
  
• Apollo. Even if he looks like a total fuckboi with his remodel, I do think thats what Apollo is supposed to look like. Most of the important parts are there, his lyre, his chariot. But as much as I like the decision to give him actual finger guns, its weird that they didnt give him a bow when hes known to have one. Also, needs a laurel wreath.
  
• Ne Zha. Made him look a lot less feminine with the remodel back in the day. They did incorporate all the parts he is known for in his base design. Wind Fire Wheels under his feet, the Armillary sash flying around him, Fire-tipped Spear in his hands and his idle animation shows him twirling the Universe Ring around. They also use a lot of the Lotus motif due to his title. So very succesful design at conveying what he is representing.
  
• Fenrir. When he finally comes out, they could make his model a bit bigger since he is supposed to be a giant wolf and now Smite actually has very different size god models in the game. On the other hand it would not fit his role as an assassin that well. I personally don't like the choice of making him bipedal, I feel like he could've just been a wolf. As for visual details, theres not much to say, he does have the runed chains he was bound with. Definitely needs a texture update.
  
• Chronos. The decision of making him a Wonderful Mechanical Man is very interesting, basically a walking clock. I do not like the "wings" made of clock handles but his staff with the clock motif looks good. At least they went all out and didn't half-ass the idea. It's a unique idea and makes him stand out in his own, overpopulated pantheon.
  
• Tyr. Not much to say about him, quite basic armored warrior design. Has the important things of missing a hand and the t-rune incorporated in the design. Good, solid design.
  
• Zhong Kui. "He is depicted as a large man with a big black beard, bulging eyes, and a wrathful expression." I think they nailed that part, rest of the iconography is also there. Bag of Demons, the brush and scrolls.
  
• Thanatos. This is another one of those designs where its really cool and awesome looking and definitely doesn't need a remodel. But he is supposed to be personification of *peaceful* death. While in Smite he is made to be some sort of Grim Reaper type who just wants everyone dead.
  
• Mercury. Winged boots, check. Roman helmet, check. Rest is just flavor.
  
• Sun Wukong. Another basic version of Sun Wukong but it works. Very recognizeable, has the most important parts with Jingubang, 72 transformations (even if its only 3 of them) and Cloud Somersault.
  
• Ah Muzen Cab. They had basically nothing to go for other than the title "God of Bees". So pretty solid design, doesn't exactly scream Mayan tho, other than the necklace.
  
• Chaac. Buff native guy with mayan tattoos, headdress and his Lightning Axe. That's pretty much all he is but another god where theres not really any visual depictions outside of massively old statues. The pauldrons with almost no other clothing look a bit silly but its otherwise good design.
  
• Geb. A rock.
  
• Ullr. Definitely needs to have something about skiing in his design or kit. Otherwise its a bit obring but decent design. I do not like the random onesided pauldron thing, I dont think a god associated with skiing and forests needs armor, maybe some hide.
  
• Kumbhakarna. Very accurate to his depictions, not much to say.
  
• Osiris. Decent design, has the beard thingy that is used in most depictions. Obviously one of the most humanlooking egyptian gods since he is not associated with animals like most others. Still just shows how little consistency there is on egyptian designs.
  
• Janus. One of the few roman original gods, that doesn't have a greek counterpart. Another Wonderful Mechanical Man but decently depicts his two faceness with the head turning around, should have more of the key motif in his design. He just carries one on his belt, doesnt even use it for anything. Good idea, execution isnt bad either.
  
• Rama. They have a trend with Hindu gods. Make them as accurate to a lot of depictions and call it a day. Very few people can complain that way.
  
• Cabrakan. Quite obscure god. He seems to be typically depicted as a massive crocodile or caiman so I guess the decision to make him look like he does, was to distinguish him from Sobek. Not sure *what* he is supposed to be but design is okay. Is he like a giant buff man/ogre-thing with crocodile scales?
  
• Sylvanus. Quite known god that was actually given one of Smite OCs as a companion. I think the addition of Grover does make his kit very interesting (I hope he is a cypress tree). Needs ult name swapped with Terra tho.
  
• Ao Kuang. I heavily prefer his new model but I feel like it doesn't make him look very kingly. Still very good design. The dragon form is awesome and nod to his old design. Definitely can tell just by looking at him that he's chinese.
  
• Hou Yi. He definitely looks like an archer but the fuck is that thing over his eye supposed to be? Half-mask with zero purpose. It's very random design, not bad, but if you remodel him, I think not too many people would feel too bad about it.
  
• Ah Puch. Very dead looking dude with a death mask. Simple but kinda effective still.
  
• Ratatoskr. What Fenrir also should be (when he comes out). Just a regular looking animal, in this case a squirrel. Has the belt pouch of a messenger. Hopefully Smite does more gods like this, not everything has to be anthropomorphized.
  
• Ravana. Decently accurate to depictions (except only having one head). For gameplay reasons, makes sense that he only has one head, at least he has reference to having multiple heads on his kit.
  
• Khepri. Yet another level of how animalistic they want to make egyptian gods. Just a straightup dung beetle, with no human elements. Design is good.
  
• Xing Tian. Theres not much to go with. He has a shield, check. He has no head, check. He has an axe, check. He uses his nipples as eyes and bellybutton as a mouth, kinda check. Accurate to what hes supposed to look like. Not sure why his belly face looks that monstrous but a bit of artistic freedom is always fine.
  
• Chiron. They did go with the traditional depiction of a centaur and not the version of Chiron where his front legs are human and only back legs are horses. But animating that would look very silly so I understand the decision. Another god with random armor parts that I feel like doesn't need them.
  
• Raijin. Good design, has the oni mask, daiko drums with tomoe symbols. Does not sit on a cloud tho. And I'm not sure why he only has three fingers and two toes.
  
• Susano. The hat is definitely added flavor to make him look more japanese but its another one of these "safe" designs. It looks japanese, has the references you need, in this case mainly his sword. But they could've done more.
  
• Fafnir. His non-dragon form is not described in the lore, they just went with how his brother is described as looking like a dwarf. Dragon form looks fine.
  

-Erlang Shen. Gets way more hate than he deserves. I do agree that his default lacks all the detail but otherwise the design is fine. Just give the armor actual details and its good. Doesn't even need to be as much as Regal Warrior, I feel like thats overkill. Current armor as base looks fine, just give it details and make it look chinese.

• Camazotz. Another obscure god. A mayan bat spirit that looks like a bipedal bat. Makes sense, pretty good design.
  
• Thoth. We going back to anthropomorphized animal designs of egyptian gods. Very close to Anubis design, less humanlike than Ra. Not sure why he only has four fingers. But overall conveys "Thoth" very well.
  
• Kuzenbo. Kappa.
  
• Cernunnos. Choice of making him an actual goatman is interesting but I feel like he represents what Cernunnos is supposed to be pretty well. I still feel like his Elk skin feels a bit more like Cernunnos than the goat but it's not bad.
  
• Ganesha. The usual Hindu way of being very accurate to depictions and thats it.
  
• Cu Chulainn. Very good choice of tattoos and colors and other details on his clothing. His base model especially is very accurate to what you could expect from his depictions.
  
• Hachiman. An archer in a very traditional looking samurai armor. He looks very japanese, doesn't try to invent anything with the design. Solid.
  
• Cerberus. The soul energy inside him is an interesting touch but otherwise its basic design. Threeheaded dog with a snake for a tail. So Cerberus.
  
• Achilles. Compare his design versus Hercules. One of the premier man-meat designs.
  
• Chernobog. They went with very basic looking demonic guy. At least he has the crystal motif going for him. He looks cool but its still quite boring design.
  
• Baron Samedi. He looks exactly like Baron Samedi. Nothing to add.
  
• King Arthur. I feel like not that many people who don't know, would guess he is King Arthur but he looks quite regal and like a warrior. They went much harder on the warrior side than king side of the design.
  
• Merlin. The addition of the old man Merlin makes his design better. A lot of people associate Merlin with the old wise wizard look (thanks to Disney) and that skin has that. His default is much more of that slightly older guy that is just better than you at what he does. Would definitely be played by Russel Crowe (20 years ago) in a movie. The design archetype is basically the same as Gale in BG3.
  
• Jormungandr. He is massive, he looks like a sea serpent.
  
• Horus. Another four-fingered birdman, for what he is, his design is good.
  
• Set. For some reason, at some point egyptian gods lost a finger and they kept that going with every single new egyptian god. Since he is based on not a real animal, kinda hard to say if he looks good or not. He looks cool at least.
  
• Olorun. Edit: Some people took it the wrong way when my point was just not knowing how he is even supposed to look like so I will not make any comment at all.
  
• Heimdallr. He does look very norse. He does have the horned helmet, the horn and his sword is there. Interesting choice that his main weapon is an axe tho. And he doesnt have his horse. But good choice of not giving him mmo shoulder armor.
  
• Cthulhu. "A monster of vaguely anthropoid outline, but with an octopus-like head whose face was a mass of feelers, a scaly, rubbery-looking body, prodigious claws on hind and fore feet, and long, narrow wings behind." Yea, they nailed that.
  
• Tsukuyomi. A very anime-esque design. There definitely isn't much to go on in the mythology, he is not nearly as well known as his siblings, Amaterasu and Susano. Cool, solid design. Would've been interesting to run with the idea of one of the lore sources where his sex isnt even known. So they could've made him female.
  
• Danzaburou. He is a tanuki, he has pg-13 version of his giant balls. Not sure why he uses a blunderbuss as his weapon but otherwise his design is very good.
  
• Gilgamesh. Hell yeah, brotha. Looks very appropriate to his origins. Not quite sure what his left gauntlet is supposed to be but overall very cool design.
  
• Atlas. I guess the color choices of his skin and hair are there representing how he is not a god but a titan. Good-ish design, incorporated the myth of him holding up the earth with the astrolabe really well. Armor is a bit weird and doesn't really fit, falls a bit too much to that "basic mmo armor" trap.
  
• Shiva. Hindu so he looks like they took a picture of his most popular depiction and went with that. Which does work.
  
• Yu Huang. Very good visual design. Looks pretty much like a lot of the old depictions of chinese emperors.
  
• Lancelot. Another quite basic design but it works for him. He is a knight and he looks like one. Could've given him a helmet though.
  
• Maui. Great design, you immediately see where he is from. I love the shoulder pads that look like they are made of wood and reeds.
  
• Surtr. Him being the old fire giant, we already knew what he was gonna look like. And he definitely looks the part.
  
• Martichoras. The big risk. Making the actual first OC of Smite, even if its based on some myths. I personally don't mind making characters like him as long as they are somewhat rooted in mythology. For design, its just a quite basic manticore.
  
• Charon. As much as I like him not being the usual boring bearded old man of Greek mythology, I don't really like him being the boneman. Incorporating the boat is important and done well but I just dont like his model. The armor looks dumb too. Why does the ferryman need armor to row souls over the Styx?
  
• Bake Kujira. I think the most obscure non-mayan addition to Smite. Very cool idea and done really well.
  

To summarize, I feel like Smite takes a lot less chances with male designs. They vary in general more than female ones, from fully being an animal like Rat or Khepri, through half-animals like a lot of egyptians to fully normal looking dudes. But a lot of the designs are like the Mario-movie, doing the bare minimum without taking any risks (and then theres Geb). And egyptian pantheon needs some consistency. But overall, after going over every single god in Smite, there's not too many absolutely horrible designs. I think the worst ones are Nemesis and Thanatos. Which is kinda funny, with them being siblings.
P.S. This took two hours to write ;_;