G ames not blocked by school

Dear M&M,
This is a list of what the nasty "JE"rk has done to me over decades. Now I'm writing this out bc I would like you to know how he has manipulated and hurt me throughout my life. Mostly, to show you that he went to extremes bc my love for you was all encompassing. When he would put me under hypnosis I wouldn't relent. I wouldn't stop loving you. And he beat me up for it. Look, my sweet M&M, I don't want you to feel like you owe me anything. Or that you have to love me. No, I just want to clear the air finally. To bring truth to what was done. You deserve that. You went through so much as well. And I would love to keep this kind of stuff private but he took that away and im left to tell the world our story so you can at least know i never gave up on you. Bc a part of me knows you never gave up on me. Also, if anyone reads this I'm healed enough to talk about everything. Don't be sad for me. I'm a super resilient person at this point and mentally tough.💪
So here it goes ok, things that happened to me that he did:

1. He raped me along with other men.
2. He told me never to say anything or he would kill me and hurt you.
3. He said he would break us up if I said anything.
4. Later, after he was appointed the investigator of the gang rape he took me and used hypnosis and torture, so as to keep me from telling the truth.
5. Him and his buddies took me to a room to discuss how they were going to destroy "evidence" which was me. Someone mentioned "get her to kill herself". So JE used hypnosis and he almost succeeded except I was found on time. It was clear he needed me to appear crazy and suggested everything that happened was bc of my past. It was part of the script I was supposed to say.
6. It became clear you wanted justice and didn't know who JE really was. He had to block my memories by taking me to a hotel where he used torture and hypnosis at the same time. He repeatedly raped me at the hotel. After several weekends I lost all conscious awareness of who you were M&M. You would appear and I wouldn't know your name or that we had a relationship.
7. He constantly blocked you and the investigation and turned it around on you, M&M.
8. He used hypnosis on me to say you sexually assaulted me. I was being questioned in the same room that JE and the other men raped me. My supervisor was getting tired of waiting around bc I kept telling them, "He didn't do anything wrong. "... once my supervisor left, JE brought out the gold chain (hypnosis) and recorded me saying you sexually assaulted me.
9. At this point, I was trained with the hypnosis, but I fought hard for you. JE also used hypnosis on other women, and they wrongfully accused you as well under hypnosis.
10. He made sure to continue to degrade me to my supervisor, and I got a "15" bc he insisted I was out of line for what happened between you and me..(SMH).
11. He took possession of all my paperwork and destroyed everything connected to you, M&M. He destroyed every memory of us and every picture. He destroyed "US."
12. He did various things to other women I'm not going to mention here.
13. He made up lies about my past to use and weaponize against me and you, or suggest it was for my protection he went to this extreme.
14. All communication between us both was severely compromised. I never received anything from you. He would make me dictate letters and write them out under hypnosis.
15. He forwarded all my mail to his home.
16. He has been monitoring my online activities since online became a thing.
17. Through hypnosis, he was able to manage to get me into relationships that destroyed my self-esteem and worth even more so. This, bc he knew you were waiting it out. Even this last time with my ex-husband. Relationships I would have never entered, but he intervened.
18. He kept me from my Gd.
19. Throughout the time he took possession of me, he painted himself as my boyfriend to others so that they wouldn't believe he was part of the gang rape or that he was continuing to rape me.
20. I was hypnotized to play a role and pretend that I wanted to be with him. That I loved him, etc.
21. People found out so he put more pressure on me and really did such a number on me mentally that I would never know you M&M (not getting into how he tortured me to lose all conscious awareness of ever knowing you M&M)
22. He's most likely kept recordings and records of this as he plays for life since what he did was catastrophic. Too many people found out the truth. I have my mind and voice back, which is the real truth.
23. He intervened with any success I could have had from going to grad school, including failing a class, gre,... having to leave prestigious work positions bc I didn't know why I was severely suffering from ptsd... bc part of the script is keeping me down. Too much clout, and he won't be believed if I succeeded professionally. PHD etc.
24. My kiddo dude... this one kills me. I was kept down so much that I hardly had the strength to fight anymore.
25. I was never going to remember you, but I did... and I'm so very grateful 🙏 now. Bc I know what love really is. I have that, at least.

There's a lot more, but that would be longer, and this is loonngg..
So dude, that's some of it. I'm just sad that I can't really discuss this in private with you bc he has compromised so much of my communication with you. The goal was for me to never know you or that I loved you so that I could clear your name and tell the truth of what was really done to us both.

Dear M&M,
This is a list of what the nasty "JE"rk has done to me over decades. Now I'm writing this out bc I would like you to know how he has manipulated and hurt me throughout my life. Mostly, to show you that he went to extremes bc my love for you was all encompassing. When he would put me under hypnosis I wouldn't relent. I wouldn't stop loving you. And he beat me up for it. Look, my sweet M&M, I don't want you to feel like you owe me anything. Or that you have to love me. No, I just want to clear the air finally. To bring truth to what was done. You deserve that. You went through so much as well. And I would love to keep this kind of stuff private but he took that away and im left to tell the world our story so you can at least know i never gave up on you. Bc a part of me knows you never gave up on me. Also, if anyone reads this I'm healed enough to talk about everything. Don't be sad for me. I'm a super resilient person at this point and mentally tough.💪
So here it goes ok, things that happened to me that he did:

1. He raped me along with other men.
2. He told me never to say anything or he would kill me and hurt you.
3. He said he would break us up if I said anything.
4. Later, after he was appointed the investigator of the gang rape he took me and used hypnosis and torture, so as to keep me from telling the truth.
5. Him and his buddies took me to a room to discuss how they were going to destroy "evidence" which was me. Someone mentioned "get her to kill herself". So JE used hypnosis and he almost succeeded except I was found on time. It was clear he needed me to appear crazy and suggested everything that happened was bc of my past. It was part of the script I was supposed to say.
6. It became clear you wanted justice and didn't know who JE really was. He had to block my memories by taking me to a hotel where he used torture and hypnosis at the same time. He repeatedly raped me at the hotel. After several weekends I lost all conscious awareness of who you were M&M. You would appear and I wouldn't know your name or that we had a relationship.
7. He constantly blocked you and the investigation and turned it around on you, M&M.
8. He used hypnosis on me to say you sexually assaulted me. I was being questioned in the same room that JE and the other men raped me. My supervisor was getting tired of waiting around bc I kept telling them, "He didn't do anything wrong. "... once my supervisor left, JE brought out the gold chain (hypnosis) and recorded me saying you sexually assaulted me.
9. At this point, I was trained with the hypnosis, but I fought hard for you. JE also used hypnosis on other women, and they wrongfully accused you as well under hypnosis.
10. He made sure to continue to degrade me to my supervisor, and I got a "15" bc he insisted I was out of line for what happened between you and me..(SMH).
11. He took possession of all my paperwork and destroyed everything connected to you, M&M. He destroyed every memory of us and every picture. He destroyed "US."
12. He did various things to other women I'm not going to mention here.
13. He made up lies about my past to use and weaponize against me and you, or suggest it was for my protection he went to this extreme.
14. All communication between us both was severely compromised. I never received anything from you. He would make me dictate letters and write them out under hypnosis.
15. He forwarded all my mail to his home.
16. He has been monitoring my online activities since online became a thing.
17. Through hypnosis, he was able to manage to get me into relationships that destroyed my self-esteem and worth even more so. This, bc he knew you were waiting it out. Even this last time with my ex-husband. Relationships I would have never entered, but he intervened.
18. He kept me from my Gd.
19. Throughout the time he took possession of me, he painted himself as my boyfriend to others so that they wouldn't believe he was part of the gang rape or that he was continuing to rape me.
20. I was hypnotized to play a role and pretend that I wanted to be with him. That I loved him, etc.
21. People found out so he put more pressure on me and really did such a number on me mentally that I would never know you M&M (not getting into how he tortured me to lose all conscious awareness of ever knowing you M&M)
22. He's most likely kept recordings and records of this as he plays for life since what he did was catastrophic. Too many people found out the truth. I have my mind and voice back, which is the real truth.
23. He intervened with any success I could have had from going to grad school, including failing a class, gre,... having to leave prestigious work positions bc I didn't know why I was severely suffering from ptsd... bc part of the script is keeping me down. Too much clout, and he won't be believed if I succeeded professionally. PHD etc.
24. My kiddo dude... this one kills me. I was kept down so much that I hardly had the strength to fight anymore.
25. I was never going to remember you, but I did... and I'm so very grateful 🙏 now. Bc I know what love really is. I have that, at least.

There's a lot more, but that would be longer, and this is loonngg..
So dude, that's some of it. I'm just sad that I can't really discuss this in private with you bc he has compromised so much of my communication with you. The goal was for me to never know you or that I loved you so that I could clear your name and tell the truth of what was really done to us both.

Dear M&M,
This is a list of what the nasty "JE"rk has done to me over decades. Now I'm writing this out bc I would like you to know how he has manipulated and hurt me throughout my life. Mostly, to show you that he went to extremes bc my love for you was all encompassing. When he would put me under hypnosis I wouldn't relent. I wouldn't stop loving you. And he beat me up for it. Look, my sweet M&M, I don't want you to feel like you owe me anything. Or that you have to love me. No, I just want to clear the air finally. To bring truth to what was done. You deserve that. You went through so much as well. And I would love to keep this kind of stuff private but he took that away and im left to tell the world our story so you can at least know i never gave up on you. Bc a part of me knows you never gave up on me. Also, if anyone reads this I'm healed enough to talk about everything. Don't be sad for me. I'm a super resilient person at this point and mentally tough.💪
So here it goes ok, things that happened to me that he did:

1. He raped me along with other men.
2. He told me never to say anything or he would kill me and hurt you.
3. He said he would break us up if I said anything.
4. Later, after he was appointed the investigator of the gang rape he took me and used hypnosis and torture, so as to keep me from telling the truth.
5. Him and his buddies took me to a room to discuss how they were going to destroy "evidence" which was me. Someone mentioned "get her to kill herself". So JE used hypnosis and he almost succeeded except I was found on time. It was clear he needed me to appear crazy and suggested everything that happened was bc of my past. It was part of the script I was supposed to say.
6. It became clear you wanted justice and didn't know who JE really was. He had to block my memories by taking me to a hotel where he used torture and hypnosis at the same time. He repeatedly raped me at the hotel. After several weekends I lost all conscious awareness of who you were M&M. You would appear and I wouldn't know your name or that we had a relationship.
7. He constantly blocked you and the investigation and turned it around on you, M&M.
8. He used hypnosis on me to say you sexually assaulted me. I was being questioned in the same room that JE and the other men raped me. My supervisor was getting tired of waiting around bc I kept telling them, "He didn't do anything wrong. "... once my supervisor left, JE brought out the gold chain (hypnosis) and recorded me saying you sexually assaulted me.
9. At this point, I was trained with the hypnosis, but I fought hard for you. JE also used hypnosis on other women, and they wrongfully accused you as well under hypnosis.
10. He made sure to continue to degrade me to my supervisor, and I got a "15" bc he insisted I was out of line for what happened between you and me..(SMH).
11. He took possession of all my paperwork and destroyed everything connected to you, M&M. He destroyed every memory of us and every picture. He destroyed "US."
12. He did various things to other women I'm not going to mention here.
13. He made up lies about my past to use and weaponize against me and you, or suggest it was for my protection he went to this extreme.
14. All communication between us both was severely compromised. I never received anything from you. He would make me dictate letters and write them out under hypnosis.
15. He forwarded all my mail to his home.
16. He has been monitoring my online activities since online became a thing.
17. Through hypnosis, he was able to manage to get me into relationships that destroyed my self-esteem and worth even more so. This, bc he knew you were waiting it out. Even this last time with my ex-husband. Relationships I would have never entered, but he intervened.
18. He kept me from my Gd.
19. Throughout the time he took possession of me, he painted himself as my boyfriend to others so that they wouldn't believe he was part of the gang rape or that he was continuing to rape me.
20. I was hypnotized to play a role and pretend that I wanted to be with him. That I loved him, etc.
21. People found out so he put more pressure on me and really did such a number on me mentally that I would never know you M&M (not getting into how he tortured me to lose all conscious awareness of ever knowing you M&M)
22. He's most likely kept recordings and records of this as he plays for life since what he did was catastrophic. Too many people found out the truth. I have my mind and voice back, which is the real truth.
23. He intervened with any success I could have had from going to grad school, including failing a class, gre,... having to leave prestigious work positions bc I didn't know why I was severely suffering from ptsd... bc part of the script is keeping me down. Too much clout, and he won't be believed if I succeeded professionally. PHD etc.
24. My kiddo dude... this one kills me. I was kept down so much that I hardly had the strength to fight anymore.
25. I was never going to remember you, but I did... and I'm so very grateful 🙏 now. Bc I know what love really is. I have that, at least.

There's a lot more, but that would be longer, and this is loonngg..
So dude, that's some of it. I'm just sad that I can't really discuss this in private with you bc he has compromised so much of my communication with you. The goal was for me to never know you or that I loved you so that I could clear your name and tell the truth of what was really done to us both.

Hi fellow SLPs, I’m in a really tough place and wanted to seek advice. Pronouns have been changed to protect the privacy of the student. Sorry if this is long-winded, I have a lot to think about.
This is my first year working in public schools. I work with a population of students with complex, high support needs. Mostly AAC, ID, autism, ASL. So far, I’ve had really collaborative parents. They’ve been so open to round table discussion. Lately, I’ve been butting heads against parents who still want to keep their kids in the sub-separate classroom or in therapy services when it is not indicated anymore. I feel this is a denial of FAPE and LRE.
One particular student (ASL is their first language, Deaf+) I’ve had this year has met all their goals (they only had one). The story I got from their staff was that the parent wanted to keep them in speech so they can learn to “speak.” My student has expressed within my speech sessions early on in the year that they do not want to speak. Their language is ASL and they are part of Deaf culture. Their ASL interpreters have affirmed my confusion about why we were working on an “maintaining pragmatic skills via interpreting figurative language” goal when that type of language gets lost in translation. However, they have done spectacular carrying over skills given exposure to figurative language and background knowledge (e.g., Translation of English idioms to ASL, teaching of figures of speech via video examples in ASL) and teaching it back in their own words in ASL. Staff have mentioned their previous SLP expressed frustration about how S/L services have not been appropriate for a while. Previous triennial testing indicated that they could not finish certain tests (e.g. GFTA-3) because they expressed they had a hard time producing sounds.
In a recent meeting for this student’s new IEP, the parent rejected the IEP because I proposed moving to a consult model. Student has met all goals, there are no language or pragmatic concerns, but the parent said they need to stay in speech because “(student) expressed they love speech” and the parent has concerns about communication outside of school in the community. These communication breakdowns occur in unfamiliar places (e.g., not paying attention to surroundings, eloping, not using the restroom or eating in unfamiliar places)…but would this not be a behavioral/psych target if their increased anxiety results in these concerns?
I do not want to give up on this student and want to support them the best I can. I do not think they will continue to benefit from direct therapy (plus having a TOD/ABA on top of speech in the mainstream classroom would be A LOT for this kid who already has anxiety and is a budding teenager who is intelligent and aware of their differences). I have loved and thoroughly enjoyed working with them. Of course I don’t want to let them go - I would work with them forever if I could. I just do not want to overstep my expertise. The student has expressed that they enjoy speech a lot, but this is not a reason to keep them in speech and I feel it is unethical (violation of LRE). Yes, I can target utilization of alternative means to communicate with hearing peers and adults in the community (I already baselined some data and student has fantastic communication repair skills, communicated beautifully via writing and typing). Student already uses the phone to communicate via text with adults and friends.
My ultimate concern is why the team is stepping around this issue to appease the parent when this is no longer in my domain of expertise? Yes, I can work on this skill via a push-in model, but to stretch it a whole year (like the current goal) when they already demonstrate the foundational communication skills at baseline? In addition, student expressed that communication needs in the community setting (e.g., ordering at a restaurant) are done by their family (hearing individuals). In order for this goal to have any impact (again, I am only a school SLP) the student needs the room and opportunity to be independent communicating with hearing individuals outside of the school in order to carryover this skill…
Honestly, I feel like I would be wasting their Medicaid, keeping the student in a more restrictive environment, and we are stuck in the same cycle again.
I appreciate whatever input I get deeply. Thank you for reading.
Note: Using my non-personal account for privacy reasons.

Edited: The title was supposed to say that: I may be a Petty jerk, but at least I got away from a toxic "friend. Auto correct changed it to Jersey, and I couldn't edit the actual title.
Fair Warning, this is going to be a LONG post, but I will try to dilute it as much as possible.
About 12 years ago I left the world of retail (of which I have MANY stories) to begin a career in childcare. Some people prefer different titles, Nanny, Babysitter, Parents' Helper, Childcare Provider, etc. To be honest each of those titles are suitable in different situations.
The first family that I Nannied for went on for about 4 years, and then on again off again for another year. Through this family, I met "Wendy" and her family. Wendy went out of her way to be friendly with me, and would often ask me to babysit her kids (B5 and G1).
At one point, I had moved on to working with another family for a few months. Sadly, that ended due to the parents getting a divorce, and they moved further away.
Wendy found out that I was unemployed and asked that I Nanny for her kids. She was also pregnant with her 3rd at the time. I agreed at a slightly discounted rate because we were "friends". I realized too late that that was a HUGE mistake on my part.
Wendy's live in boyfriend "Cole" also had 3 kids from a previous relationship. B15, G8, and G6 lived with their mother. Yes, am aware of the closeness in age of Wendy and Cole' B5 and his G6. I chose to keep my mouth shut.
Now prepare yourselves for the Rollercoaster of emotions I dealt with with this family.
Initially, both Wendy and Cole were employed. I would come over 5 days a week for 8 to 10 hour days, depending upon whether Wendy got home on time. Here is where my discounted rate bit me in the butt.... $300 a week was still complained about. Wendy asked that I not leave Cole alone with their kids because he basically ignored them and refused to change diapers. I felt pretty icky about that, but agreed. Now I lived 45 minutes away without traffic. I would often leave my house early in anticipation of possible traffic. If I arrived early, I wasn't allowed in until she our alloted time of 7am. I didn't have a key, and would often be left waiting on the porch an extra 15 minutes past our time. If I knew I was too early, I parked around the corner and ate breakfast. Wendy and Cole both got very irritated if I wasn't their door precisely at 7 am. It was a headache that I chose to avoid.
Over the first month, I realized that G2 was emotionally abused by Wendy. She constantly said to or in front of the child how much she hated dealing with the wild child. How she wished G2 was more well behaved like B5. She even wrote unkind things on Facebook, asking someone to take her on the weekend while I was off.
This took a toll on poor G2, obviously. She would get violent with me first thing in the mornings : Hitting, kicking, biting, pulling my hair, throwing things at me, or what ever popped into her mind. Eventually, once Wendy left for work G2 would calm down and become an absolute delight.
When B5 started school, Wendy took a new job that allowed her to work from home at times. Those were not fun days! I asked if I could bring G2 to my house where I have an outdoor play area, a playroom, plenty of kid movies, crafts, books, music, and local playgrounds. At first the car rides were torture with G2 screaming bloody murder for at least half of the 45 minute drive. When she got used to the new routine, those drives became pleasant. Her violent tendencies disappeared when we were spending the days at my home. The drawback was that I also had to drive her home in time to get B5 off the bus.
During school breaks, I also had B5, and if they were visiting G8 and G6. B15 stayed at Wendy's house and just did his own thing. If you thought G2 was torture in toddler form, these two girls would have made Nanny McPhee grow a few more moles, a hunch back, and closed feet.
B5 would get a little bored, being that he was the only boy that was understandable. I purchased an array of boy friendlier toys to entertain him. I already had a lot of girl friendly toys either purchased or gifted from the first family that I had worked with. Of course I had plenty of gender neutral items too.
Wendy and Cole didn't give 2 sh*ts and a shave if the kids watched TV all day, went out to a playground or museum, or were driven 2 hours away, as long as I got them home on time. I easily spent an entire paycheck on activities, gas, food (which they didn't pack), and toys over 2 weeks watching all 4 kids. By the by, when asked for additional money when I did have all 4, Wendy not so politely informed me that the kids are entertain each other, so my job should be easier with all 4.
My husband and I discussed a few times whether I should look for something else. Inevitably the people pleaser in me actually felt guilty even considering it. Yup, I was apparently a glutton for punishment. Gratefully, my income was just extra, for an nice meal out occasionally, gifts for birthdays and holiday, extra hobbies, and basic groceries.
Just before Wendy gave birth to their new baby, she became unemployed. Logically, one would think this was my easy out. NOPE!! I became more of a Mother's Helper / Nanny. At this point Wendy and Cole were beginning to look for a larger house to rent. I did more walk through than I can count. She even asked me to tour a couple without her, and to bring G2 and B5 so she could get her nails done and take a nap. (Seriously, I toured houses on her list without her!)
As we spent more and more time together, I began to learn FAR FAR more about her bedroom life than I could ever desire. G2 and I spent much less time in the peace of my home, and way too much in Wendy's company. G2's behavior began to deteriorate slowly, causing Wendy to lose her temper with her far too easily. This completely broke my heart. I TRIED to redirect them both, and expressed my concern to Wendy. Of course, she then turned her anger towards me.
Wendy would openly discuss her theories about Cole in front of her kids. She claimed that he was cheating on her with his ex because he would shower immediately after seeing her to pick up or drop off the kids. He often made those drives directly after work though. Maybe he was cheating, maybe not. I honestly don't know.
Wendy also enjoyed gossiping about absolutely anybody. The parents of the first family that worked with were having marital issues. This was a favorite topic of hers. Wendy told me about every unkind word her mother uttered in her direction. The apple obviously didn't fall far from the tree here. I was told lots of personal information about people I didn't know. The gossip made me very uncomfortable. I told her that I would prefer we not discuss the lives of people who weren't around to speak on their own behalf. This fell on deaf ears.
I became quite used to her disapproval of my loose fitting jeans and T-shirts. Working with kids, I found my favorite cartoon prints were just as possible with my tiny charges. I NEVER wear makeup or heels because I simply don't want to. My dresses always have leggings under them because it make me feel less vulnerable. I never wear shorts or above the knee skirts/dresses. That's a ME thing, not religious or cultural. I find my "uniform" of choice is ideal for working with kids. Wendy informed me more than once that it embarrassed her to be seen in public with me. She often insisted that I wear something of hers if we had to go anywhere.
My husband enjoys photography, particularly long exposure which is done at night. He has a lot of photography friends of both genders, but his best friend is a female. He also enjoys concerts and kayaking, often with an ex from high school. (He graduated in 1997). I trust my husband and have no problem with him spending time with his friends. Enter Wendy's whispers of accusations. She often "jokingly" accused him of cheating on me with these female friends. I don't enjoy concerts, crowds, or being out late; so I support his doing with people who do. At least I know he with someone if something happens. I have bad knees, which make getting in and out of a kayak difficult. Why should that stop him? Again, I told her that I trust him and that I don't appreciate her accusations joke or not. This annoyed her because she doesn't trust Cole.
I know these are major red flag issues. I know how toxic being subjected to these comments is. I also know how difficult it would be on their kids if I left too soon. I knew they needed someone who wasn't emotionally cruel. I stayed for them.
My husband and I spent 2 of our weekends helping them pack and move to house that ended up 15 minutes from us. We were thanked by words, but that was the extent of the gratitude. Wendy's mother looked after the kids while we helped them move. This was complained about because I was already paid to watch the kids during the week. Insert eye roll here!! Her mom felt my husband should be willing to help them move while I watched the kids on the weekend for no extra pay. Either way, we were doing them a HUGE favor to begin with.
A family that I had briefly Nannied for prior to working for Wendy asked if I could help out every other Saturday. The dad (Nice Guy) traveled a lot for work leaving the Mom (Angelface) home alone with the kids. She just needed a day to run errands, work out, and just have time to herself. Angelface is one of the kindest women on this planet. When I did Nanny for them (2 days a week), she was in tears when she had to let me go. They couldn't justify the outgoing money at the time. She referred me to several friends. I am legitimately friend with this family, and still babysit sporadically.
Through a random discussion, I told Wendy about working with Angelface on every other Saturday. She began to tell me what to charge, how many hours to work, and what days to leave open for her just in case. Insert headache inducing eyerolls!
One Friday, Wendy's cousin arrived for a weekend visit with her baby. Wendy told me that because it was a holiday weekend I would not be needed until Tuesday. I double checked via text, and she confirmed that she and Cole were taking the kids to the beach with her cousin. Monday morning I got a call from a passed off Wendy asking where I am. I reminded her that she had told me that they would not need me. I even took a screen shot of our text. She said that Cole had decided to work Monday anyway so she was alone with HER kids. This pissed me off, so I lied. I told her that I was out of town with my mom and wouldn't be home until 5 or 6 pm. She went on about how much of an inconvenience it was to her, and I should have checked before going out of town. For the second time, I sent her a screenshot of my text verifying that I wasn't needed Monday. She abruptly ended the call saying to just be sure to be on time Tuesday. I had NEVER been late, but opted to mention that as we hung up.
Over time we worked out a new arrangement where I brought now G3 to my house 2 days a week, and we stayed there 3 days a week. I helped with cleaning, errands, helped with the new baby (NB), etc. Mostly, I was Wendy's sounding board. She continued to accuse Cole of cheating, wasting money, and even beating her.
My husband and I offered to let her and the kids stay with us, but she declined. Wendy even told me that since she was so sure Cole was cheating, she was going to find herself a side boyfriend to cheat with. I tried to talk her out of it, to no avail. Sadly, she spoke openly about her new boyfriend in fron of G3. During one of her rants I learned that my pay came from him selling drugs. GULP!!
While cleaning out the couch one day, I came across a loaded gun kept in the couch console thing, along with baggies of pills, "dried plants", and white powder. This completely freaked me out. 2 small children and a soon to be crawling baby sat and played on and around that couch. I STRONGLY considered calling Child Pretective Services and the police. I quickly realized that if I did, they would know it was me. I regret it, but I feared their possible retaliation towards us.
Shortly after finding these thing Cole quit his job. For several months while I worked for them, they were both unemployed. Again, I thought it was an easy out. NOPE AGAIN! For another 3 months, they insisted that they couldn't take care of the house and kids without my help. Very often, I arrived to find now B6 fending for himself for breakfast and getting ready for school. He was told to wake up and unlock the door for me, but they went back to sleep. I was expected to keep the baby from crying, and to keep G3 quiet and entertained until they came downstairs. I often chose to simply take both to my house so we could play naturally. We had a crib, so this wasn't a problem for NB. G3 would just nap on the couch or my bed. When out of school B6 preferred this too. This really should have told Wendy and Cole something about their kids, but of course not.
FINALLY, I was informed after about a year of working for them, they could no longer justify paying me. At this point, I had often considered quitting anyway. I mainly stayed because my heart broke for the kids. However, based on her gossipy and judgmental nature ... not to mention my little 3 day weekend fail; I was concerned about what kind of reference Wendy would provide if I chose to quit.
So in 2019, I found myself happily unemployed. The timing here worked out beautifully because Angelface knew neighbors due to have their first baby in 2020. I ended up working for this lovely family until August of 2023. The mom (Joy) and the Dad (Mr. Cool) were such a relief to my entire mental and physical health. We became friends as well, and over time I told them about Wendy. Between Joy, Angelface, Mr. Cool, Nice Guy, my husband, and family I began to realize just hoe toxic Wendy really was to my mental health. My husband never liked her but understood my feelings towards the kids.
For almost a year Wendy would randomly call or FaceTime me .... more often than not while drunk. She would rave about how much she and the kids missed me. We would get together for a meal, and she had me over for a couple birthday parties for the kids. I found myself almost always being the only sober adult watching the kids as the adults partied. Wendy often went back to her gossiping, trash talking, and "jokes" about my husband spending time with women. She would offer underhanded compliments. "It's so nice to see you wearing a dress instead of those tacky T-shirts." You get the drift. She even INFORMED me that since her neighbor was pregnant I could quit my job with Joy and Mr. Cool. She had told her neighbor that I would work for her now, and since they were next door, I would watch her own kids too. I shut that down saying that I was quite happy working with Joy and Mr. Cool. I even lied about what they paid thinking it would detur her further. NOPE yet again. She said that I should quit anyway so her life would be easier with me around. Once more, I told her that wasn't going to happen.
AT LONG LAST, I am coming to the end of my tortuous endurment with Wendy.
A week later, she called and asked if I had quit yet. I said that I had no intention of leaving an "$800" a week job. (Not even close to that with my 3 day a week job, but she didn't need to know the truth.) She told me to let her know when I quit, then changed the subject towards gossiping about that first family and their problems. I told her that I don't feel comfortable gossiping about people who can't speak for themselves. That pissed her off, so she turned it on me again. She said of course I don't want to talk about them since my husband was cheating on me with 2 different women. I angrily corrected her. She has no reason to think my husband is cheating, and I trust him and our friends. Just because she thinks her boyfriend cheats, and she cheats, that doesn't mean everybody does. She then said we could talk when I calmed down and after I quit my job.
After hanging up, I proceeded to block Wendy on everything! Facebook, phone calls, texting, face timing, Instagram, and even Snapchat (which I hadn't used in over a year). I also blocked her mom, and any body that had been friendly simply because Wendy knew them and wanted me to have their information too. I gave her no warning at all. I was beyond passed off, and refused to be talked out of my very gratifying decision.
I told my husband, family, and friends that was now free of Wendy. Not a single person tried to tell me to make ammends. The only guilt that I feel is towards those poor kids. For once though, I put myself first. Joy and Angelface were both extremely supportive when I told them that I had Ghosted Wendy. Both even mentioned how proud they were of me for FINALLY truly stand-up for myself. They were NOT fans of Wendy!!!
I never ended up quitting my job with Joy and Mr. Cool inorder to babysit Wendy's neighbor. I also continued to babysit for Angelface and Nice Guy.
About 7 or 8 months ago, I ran into Wendy at a playground between our two homes. She was with now G5 and B2. I had Joy and Mr. Cool's daughter with me. I was polite, almost obscenely so. I was friendly towards the kids, who were stand off-ish. I offered to let Little Miss play with them, but they weren't interested. Little Miss wanted to do her own thing, so off we went to play. We left after only 15 minutes because Little Miss said "that lady" is scaring her.
That night, my husband got a Facebook message from Wendy. She described my cruelty towards her kids by ignoring them. She said that it was so hateful that I blocked her on everything after all she had done for us. This message went on and on. My husband left it unread for months before my morbid curiosity caused me to open the silly thing. We never responded, but instead he finally bl9cked her too.
Ok, if you read that bloody novel of a post, you are a ROCK STAR!! I don't have any regrets towards my eventual choice, except towards the kids. It breaks my heart knowing what kind of parents they are enduring. I often regret not calling CPS, but there isn't a shadow of doubt that would have retaliated .... most likely violently.
I did eventually get back in contact with that very first Nanny family. They had indeed broken up, but both are happier and healthier now. I warned them that Wendy enjoyed gossiping and spreading rumors about them. Neither were surprised, and both had broken contact with Wendy long ago. They supported my choice to break ties with her as well. Shocking, right!?!
I no longer work full time for Joy and Mr. Cool, as they wanted Little Miss to get used to being around more kids before starting school. I do still sporadically babysit for them and Angelface and Nice Guy though. The two couples have referred me to several other families in the neighborhood, so I stay pretty busy with much more sane individuals.
Maybe I was a jerk, and petty. I'm cool with being thought of that way towards Wendy. At least now, I have much kinder people in my life.

Hi everyone! Thank you so much for all your feedback on the last version. I haven’t changed too much except for the last blurb paragraph which I think is hookier now and I hope solves the problem of not explaining how the story could have sexual prose. I also removed a paragraph from my first three hundred. I hope this version works better now, but please let me know if not.
Dear [AGENT],
Because you like [personalization], I hope you’ll be interested in PHOEBE, my 85,000 word upmarket women’s novel that explores cultural identity and a complicated friendship between two Vietnamese-Americans as they navigate their first years of womanhood.
When twenty-eight year old Phoebe drops out of grad school and gets arrested for assaulting a police officer, the only person she has left to call is her adoptive sister, Gigi.
Phoebe doesn’t have any other family left. After her father killed himself the morning of her high school graduation, her mother drove her across the country to stay with a family friend in Southern California and disappeared. For years, Phoebe was content following Gigi around, even attending college just to stay near her. But when Gigi decided to move away for dental school in San Francisco, Phoebe’s life began its downward spiral.
The day Gigi comes to pick her up, Phoebe is shocked to discover that Gigi is hiding a pregnancy and eloping with a man Phoebe has never met. Without other options, Phoebe soon finds herself moving in with Gigi, Gigi's rich new husband, and their infant son in the moneyed suburb of Arcadia. But Gigi and her husband are always passive-aggressively arguing, and Gigi’s dissatisfaction with motherhood is clear.
In the court mandated therapy sessions following her arrest, Phoebe is forced to recall the trauma she experienced growing up as an immigrant’s child in the Midwest and confront how her loneliness and need for love wrecked the decisions she’s made. Meanwhile, Gigi uncovers a secret about Phoebe’s mother that could change both of their lives.
With flashback cuts similar to the film Challengers (2024), PHOEBE combines the sexual prose and psychological musings of MILK FED by Melissa Broder with the exploration of generational trauma in BANYAN MOON by Thao Thai.
First 300 (again for context, Phoebe refers to Gigi by her full name, Regina)
Regina says my worst trait is how paranoid and judgemental I am. She thinks that I’m always looking over my shoulder, waiting for the next terrible thing to happen, and that I only see the worst in people. She’s not wrong. But unlike her, I haven’t had the sort of life that begets beauty and easy fortune. Every good thing that has ever happened to me was just another suffering in disguise.
My phone buzzes in my hand, and I don’t have to look down at the screen to know it’s Ishaan. It’s been nearly a year since I last saw him, and the same amount of time since I last responded to him. In some messages, he’s worried about me. In others, he’s saying he wants to clear the air, apologize for what happened between us. We need to talk is the most common sequence of words I get. I know he’ll tell me it was all a misunderstanding, but I’m tired of not knowing who to believe, him or my own eyes.
I don’t have his number saved anymore, but I know all the digits that make it up. If you scrambled up all the numbers in a big bag, I could dig them out and place them in back order. Regina says I should just block him and move on, but how can I? He is the monster that I wrought with my own hands. A meat-eating, prospect destroying, body snatching narcissist who was once a sweet twelve-year old boy I could’ve loved but ruined instead.

I may be the A-H and a bit Petty, but at least I got away from a toxic "friend".
Fair Warning, this is going to be a LONG post, but I will try to dilute it as much as possible.
About 12 years ago I left the world of retail (of which I have MANY stories) to begin a career in childcare. Some people prefer different titles, Nanny, Babysitter, Parents' Helper, Childcare Provider, etc. To be honest each of those titles are suitable in different situations.
The first family that I Nannied for went on for about 4 years, and then on again off again for another year. Through this family, I met "Wendy" and her family. Wendy went out of her way to be friendly with me, and would often ask me to babysit her kids (B5 and G1).
At one point, I had moved on to working with another family for a few months. Sadly, that ended due to the parents getting a divorce, and they moved further away.
Wendy found out that I was unemployed and asked that I Nanny for her kids. She was also pregnant with her 3rd at the time. I agreed at a slightly discounted rate because we were "friends". I realized too late that that was a HUGE mistake on my part.
Wendy's live in boyfriend "Cole" also had 3 kids from a previous relationship. B15, G8, and G6 lived with their mother. Yes, am aware of the closeness in age of Wendy and Cole' B5 and his G6. I chose to keep my mouth shut.
Now prepare yourselves for the Rollercoaster of emotions I dealt with with this family.
Initially, both Wendy and Cole were employed. I would come over 5 days a week for 8 to 10 hour days, depending upon whether Wendy got home on time. Here is where my discounted rate bit me in the butt.... $300 a week was still complained about. Wendy asked that I not leave Cole alone with their kids because he basically ignored them and refused to change diapers. I felt pretty icky about that, but agreed. Now I lived 45 minutes away without traffic. I would often leave my house early in anticipation of possible traffic. If I arrived early, I wasn't allowed in until she our alloted time of 7am. I didn't have a key, and would often be left waiting on the porch an extra 15 minutes past our time. If I knew I was too early, I parked around the corner and ate breakfast. Wendy and Cole both got very irritated if I wasn't their door precisely at 7 am. It was a headache that I chose to avoid.
Over the first month, I realized that G2 was emotionally abused by Wendy. She constantly said to or in front of the child how much she hated dealing with the wild child. How she wished G2 was more well behaved like B5. She even wrote unkind things on Facebook, asking someone to take her on the weekend while I was off.
This took a toll on poor G2, obviously. She would get violent with me first thing in the mornings : Hitting, kicking, biting, pulling my hair, throwing things at me, or what ever popped into her mind. Eventually, once Wendy left for work G2 would calm down and become an absolute delight.
When B5 started school, Wendy took a new job that allowed her to work from home at times. Those were not fun days! I asked if I could bring G2 to my house where I have an outdoor play area, a playroom, plenty of kid movies, crafts, books, music, and local playgrounds. At first the car rides were torture with G2 screaming bloody murder for at least half of the 45 minute drive. When she got used to the new routine, those drives became pleasant. Her violent tendencies disappeared when we were spending the days at my home. The drawback was that I also had to drive her home in time to get B5 off the bus.
During school breaks, I also had B5, and if they were visiting G8 and G6. B15 stayed at Wendy's house and just did his own thing. If you thought G2 was torture in toddler form, these two girls would have made Nanny McPhee grow a few more moles, a hunch back, and closed feet.
B5 would get a little bored, being that he was the only boy that was understandable. I purchased an array of boy friendlier toys to entertain him. I already had a lot of girl friendly toys either purchased or gifted from the first family that I had worked with. Of course I had plenty of gender neutral items too.
Wendy and Cole didn't give 2 sh*ts and a shave if the kids watched TV all day, went out to a playground or museum, or were driven 2 hours away, as long as I got them home on time. I easily spent an entire paycheck on activities, gas, food (which they didn't pack), and toys over 2 weeks watching all 4 kids. By the by, when asked for additional money when I did have all 4, Wendy not so politely informed me that the kids are entertain each other, so my job should be easier with all 4.
My husband and I discussed a few times whether I should look for something else. Inevitably the people pleaser in me actually felt guilty even considering it. Yup, I was apparently a glutton for punishment. Gratefully, my income was just extra, for an nice meal out occasionally, gifts for birthdays and holiday, extra hobbies, and basic groceries.
Just before Wendy gave birth to their new baby, she became unemployed. Logically, one would think this was my easy out. NOPE!! I became more of a Mother's Helper / Nanny. At this point Wendy and Cole were beginning to look for a larger house to rent. I did more walk through than I can count. She even asked me to tour a couple without her, and to bring G2 and B5 so she could get her nails done and take a nap. (Seriously, I toured houses on her list without her!)
As we spent more and more time together, I began to learn FAR FAR more about her bedroom life than I could ever desire. G2 and I spent much less time in the peace of my home, and way too much in Wendy's company. G2's behavior began to deteriorate slowly, causing Wendy to lose her temper with her far too easily. This completely broke my heart. I TRIED to redirect them both, and expressed my concern to Wendy. Of course, she then turned her anger towards me.
Wendy would openly discuss her theories about Cole in front of her kids. She claimed that he was cheating on her with his ex because he would shower immediately after seeing her to pick up or drop off the kids. He often made those drives directly after work though. Maybe he was cheating, maybe not. I honestly don't know.
Wendy also enjoyed gossiping about absolutely anybody. The parents of the first family that worked with were having marital issues. This was a favorite topic of hers. Wendy told me about every unkind word her mother uttered in her direction. The apple obviously didn't fall far from the tree here. I was told lots of personal information about people I didn't know. The gossip made me very uncomfortable. I told her that I would prefer we not discuss the lives of people who weren't around to speak on their own behalf. This fell on deaf ears.
I became quite used to her disapproval of my loose fitting jeans and T-shirts. Working with kids, I found my favorite cartoon prints were just as possible with my tiny charges. I NEVER wear makeup or heels because I simply don't want to. My dresses always have leggings under them because it make me feel less vulnerable. I never wear shorts or above the knee skirts/dresses. That's a ME thing, not religious or cultural. I find my "uniform" of choice is ideal for working with kids. Wendy informed me more than once that it embarrassed her to be seen in public with me. She often insisted that I wear something of hers if we had to go anywhere.
My husband enjoys photography, particularly long exposure which is done at night. He has a lot of photography friends of both genders, but his best friend is a female. He also enjoys concerts and kayaking, often with an ex from high school. (He graduated in 1997). I trust my husband and have no problem with him spending time with his friends. Enter Wendy's whispers of accusations. She often "jokingly" accused him of cheating on me with these female friends. I don't enjoy concerts, crowds, or being out late; so I support his doing with people who do. At least I know he with someone if something happens. I have bad knees, which make getting in and out of a kayak difficult. Why should that stop him? Again, I told her that I trust him and that I don't appreciate her accusations joke or not. This annoyed her because she doesn't trust Cole.
I know these are major red flag issues. I know how toxic being subjected to these comments is. I also know how difficult it would be on their kids if I left too soon. I knew they needed someone who wasn't emotionally cruel. I stayed for them.
My husband and I spent 2 of our weekends helping them pack and move to house that ended up 15 minutes from us. We were thanked by words, but that was the extent of the gratitude. Wendy's mother looked after the kids while we helped them move. This was complained about because I was already paid to watch the kids during the week. Insert eye roll here!! Her mom felt my husband should be willing to help them move while I watched the kids on the weekend for no extra pay. Either way, we were doing them a HUGE favor to begin with.
A family that I had briefly Nannied for prior to working for Wendy asked if I could help out every other Saturday. The dad (Nice Guy) traveled a lot for work leaving the Mom (Angelface) home alone with the kids. She just needed a day to run errands, work out, and just have time to herself. Angelface is one of the kindest women on this planet. When I did Nanny for them (2 days a week), she was in tears when she had to let me go. They couldn't justify the outgoing money at the time. She referred me to several friends. I am legitimately friend with this family, and still babysit sporadically.
Through a random discussion, I told Wendy about working with Angelface on every other Saturday. She began to tell me what to charge, how many hours to work, and what days to leave open for her just in case. Insert headache inducing eyerolls!
One Friday, Wendy's cousin arrived for a weekend visit with her baby. Wendy told me that because it was a holiday weekend I would not be needed until Tuesday. I double checked via text, and she confirmed that she and Cole were taking the kids to the beach with her cousin. Monday morning I got a call from a passed off Wendy asking where I am. I reminded her that she had told me that they would not need me. I even took a screen shot of our text. She said that Cole had decided to work Monday anyway so she was alone with HER kids. This pissed me off, so I lied. I told her that I was out of town with my mom and wouldn't be home until 5 or 6 pm. She went on about how much of an inconvenience it was to her, and I should have checked before going out of town. For the second time, I sent her a screenshot of my text verifying that I wasn't needed Monday. She abruptly ended the call saying to just be sure to be on time Tuesday. I had NEVER been late, but opted to mention that as we hung up.
Over time we worked out a new arrangement where I brought now G3 to my house 2 days a week, and we stayed there 3 days a week. I helped with cleaning, errands, helped with the new baby (NB), etc. Mostly, I was Wendy's sounding board. She continued to accuse Cole of cheating, wasting money, and even beating her.
My husband and I offered to let her and the kids stay with us, but she declined. Wendy even told me that since she was so sure Cole was cheating, she was going to find herself a side boyfriend to cheat with. I tried to talk her out of it, to no avail. Sadly, she spoke openly about her new boyfriend in fron of G3. During one of her rants I learned that my pay came from him selling drugs. GULP!!
While cleaning out the couch one day, I came across a loaded gun kept in the couch console thing, along with baggies of pills, "dried plants", and white powder. This completely freaked me out. 2 small children and a soon to be crawling baby sat and played on and around that couch. I STRONGLY considered calling Child Pretective Services and the police. I quickly realized that if I did, they would know it was me. I regret it, but I feared their possible retaliation towards us.
Shortly after finding these thing Cole quit his job. For several months while I worked for them, they were both unemployed. Again, I thought it was an easy out. NOPE AGAIN! For another 3 months, they insisted that they couldn't take care of the house and kids without my help. Very often, I arrived to find now B6 fending for himself for breakfast and getting ready for school. He was told to wake up and unlock the door for me, but they went back to sleep. I was expected to keep the baby from crying, and to keep G3 quiet and entertained until they came downstairs. I often chose to simply take both to my house so we could play naturally. We had a crib, so this wasn't a problem for NB. G3 would just nap on the couch or my bed. When out of school B6 preferred this too. This really should have told Wendy and Cole something about their kids, but of course not.
FINALLY, I was informed after about a year of working for them, they could no longer justify paying me. At this point, I had often considered quitting anyway. I mainly stayed because my heart broke for the kids. However, based on her gossipy and judgmental nature ... not to mention my little 3 day weekend fail; I was concerned about what kind of reference Wendy would provide if I chose to quit.
So in 2019, I found myself happily unemployed. The timing here worked out beautifully because Angelface knew neighbors due to have their first baby in 2020. I ended up working for this lovely family until August of 2023. The mom (Joy) and the Dad (Mr. Cool) were such a relief to my entire mental and physical health. We became friends as well, and over time I told them about Wendy. Between Joy, Angelface, Mr. Cool, Nice Guy, my husband, and family I began to realize just hoe toxic Wendy really was to my mental health. My husband never liked her but understood my feelings towards the kids.
For almost a year Wendy would randomly call or FaceTime me .... more often than not while drunk. She would rave about how much she and the kids missed me. We would get together for a meal, and she had me over for a couple birthday parties for the kids. I found myself almost always being the only sober adult watching the kids as the adults partied. Wendy often went back to her gossiping, trash talking, and "jokes" about my husband spending time with women. She would offer underhanded compliments. "It's so nice to see you wearing a dress instead of those tacky T-shirts." You get the drift. She even INFORMED me that since her neighbor was pregnant I could quit my job with Joy and Mr. Cool. She had told her neighbor that I would work for her now, and since they were next door, I would watch her own kids too. I shut that down saying that I was quite happy working with Joy and Mr. Cool. I even lied about what they paid thinking it would detur her further. NOPE yet again. She said that I should quit anyway so her life would be easier with me around. Once more, I told her that wasn't going to happen.
AT LONG LAST, I am coming to the end of my tortuous endurment with Wendy.
A week later, she called and asked if I had quit yet. I said that I had no intention of leaving an "$800" a week job. (Not even close to that with my 3 day a week job, but she didn't need to know the truth.) She told me to let her know when I quit, then changed the subject towards gossiping about that first family and their problems. I told her that I don't feel comfortable gossiping about people who can't speak for themselves. That pissed her off, so she turned it on me again. She said of course I don't want to talk about them since my husband was cheating on me with 2 different women. I angrily corrected her. She has no reason to think my husband is cheating, and I trust him and our friends. Just because she thinks her boyfriend cheats, and she cheats, that doesn't mean everybody does. She then said we could talk when I calmed down and after I quit my job.
After hanging up, I proceeded to block Wendy on everything! Facebook, phone calls, texting, face timing, Instagram, and even Snapchat (which I hadn't used in over a year). I also blocked her mom, and any body that had been friendly simply because Wendy knew them and wanted me to have their information too. I gave her no warning at all. I was beyond passed off, and refused to be talked out of my very gratifying decision.
I told my husband, family, and friends that was now free of Wendy. Not a single person tried to tell me to make ammends. The only guilt that I feel is towards those poor kids. For once though, I put myself first. Joy and Angelface were both extremely supportive when I told them that I had Ghosted Wendy. Both even mentioned how proud they were of me for FINALLY truly stand-up for myself. They were NOT fans of Wendy!!!
I never ended up quitting my job with Joy and Mr. Cool inorder to babysit Wendy's neighbor. I also continued to babysit for Angelface and Nice Guy.
About 7 or 8 months ago, I ran into Wendy at a playground between our two homes. She was with now G5 and B2. I had Joy and Mr. Cool's daughter with me. I was polite, almost obscenely so. I was friendly towards the kids, who were stand off-ish. I offered to let Little Miss play with them, but they weren't interested. Little Miss wanted to do her own thing, so off we went to play. We left after only 15 minutes because Little Miss said "that lady" is scaring her.
That night, my husband got a Facebook message from Wendy. She described my cruelty towards her kids by ignoring them. She said that it was so hateful that I blocked her on everything after all she had done for us. This message went on and on. My husband left it unread for months before my morbid curiosity caused me to open the silly thing. We never responded, but instead he finally bl9cked her too.
Ok, if you read that bloody novel of a post, you are a ROCK STAR!! I don't have any regrets towards my eventual choice, except towards the kids. It breaks my heart knowing what kind of parents they are enduring. I often regret not calling CPS, but there isn't a shadow of doubt that would have retaliated .... most likely violently.
I did eventually get back in contact with that very first Nanny family. They had indeed broken up, but both are happier and healthier now. I warned them that Wendy enjoyed gossiping and spreading rumors about them. Neither were surprised, and both had broken contact with Wendy long ago. They supported my choice to break ties with her as well. Shocking, right!?!
I no longer work full time for Joy and Mr. Cool, as they wanted Little Miss to get used to being around more kids before starting school. I do still sporadically babysit for them and Angelface and Nice Guy though. The two couples have referred me to several other families in the neighborhood, so I stay pretty busy with much more sane individuals.
Maybe I was an A-Hole, and petty. I'm cool with being thought of that way towards Wendy. At least now, I have much kinder people in my life.

For context, M (25), from a poor Eastern European country, I still live with my parents, I'm basically a freelancer but I don't earn enough to support myself, I finished high school, but I dropped out of college because in our country on no one is interested in the college diploma, approximately 70% of those who finish college work in other fields of activity than what they have on the diploma, most of them are employed through relationships.
2 years ago I decided that I wanted to become a graphic designer, in the meantime I found out that I like illustration by doing graphic design, I met some wonderful people from an animation studio, who are also my mentors and give me work. At the moment I can make okish illustrations, but I have a lot to learn, at the moment I'm just an average illustrator who can be replaced by an Ai at any time.
I'm quite motivated to learn, but procrastination is killing me, I've tried methods from the internet and programs that block my distractions, ADHD is not recognized in my country as a disorder and there are not many therapists and medicines, and my financial situation does not allow me to go to another country for treatment. I'm quite self-aware of myself, I don't have depression, I'm motivated but I procrastinate a lot!

My sister(17F) is the baby of the family and has been treated pretty well since she was a child. We already noticed that she was a bit different when she was younger, she cried every day until she was around 14 and was pretty confrontational. Every few day an argument would spark up and sometimes(but very rarely) it would get physical. It was excused as a quirk she just had(since I was also a bit of a rowdy child who argued a LOT) but it was only these past few years that her behavior began to get worse. She started become more argumentative, cursing a lot, and began to treat me(18F) and my siblings(all 20+) condescendingly and talks down to us.
She began to leave home to visit her friends in the neighborhood or go out with her friends, which was allowed as long as she alerted my mom to where she was going. However, when my mom didn't want her to go to an event with her friends, she contested the refusal which led to a huge argument. A few days later, she snuck out and worried everyone in the house. I had to call all her friends to ask where she went. When she eventually came home, wayyy after the sun had set, she was angry that we questioned her on where she was and why she left. Another argument happened and she ended up upset that we told her that her behavior wasn't appropriate for a Muslim girl. This was the first of three times she snuck out without permission and they all ended the same, her believing she was a victim and wasn't at fault at all.
More recently, like I mentioned earlier, her behavior towards me and my older siblings is completely out of line. Sometimes she treats us as if she expects us to wait hand and foot for her, ordering us around and making snide comments about us. I caught her wearing my clothes without permission 10 TIMES, all of which I asked to to tell me first. She didn't. I had to resort to storing my clothes in my older siblings room, which is usually inaccessible to her, to prevent her from wearing them any longer. Ive also caught her stealing my snacks before, though i just let it lie. Arguing with her is extremely tiring and just make the mood of the house go down. She also uses brushes and products that my siblings bought with their own money without telling them, and sometimes finishing it from them all together. We all know it was her because she is the only one interested in styling her hair. Its also one of the reasons we(me, her, and some neighborhood friends) are late to school almost every day. I should have suspected something was going on at that point because I had already caught her with her head covering half off or showing her neck/chest.
She is especially interested in asking which of the siblings are the most attractive. She even asked our parents that question multiple times. She begins arguments that blow out of control over the smallest of things. A couple months ago, she was upset that I was using the family TV to watch a show and tried to order me to get off so she could watch herself. When I pointed out that she could use her chromebook or phone, she replied that she didn't want to. She only wanted to use the TV. I also had my own devices I could have used, and would have if she was watching something with another one of my siblings, but her command didn't agree with me. Even so, I was willing to let it go so I told her that I would finish the rest of my episode(20 minutes) then hand it over. As you probably guessed, if turned into argument because she wanted to use it at that exact moment. My oldest sibling had to interfere because she was just about screaming the whole house down. It wasn't a one time thing either. I rarely use the family TV since I have my own devices and almost ever other time I use it, she suddenly has a problem with me doing so. Whenever I point out that she can watch on anything other than the family TV, she always doesn't "want" to, even when I'm trying to watch with another sibling.
There is this one specific incident that sticks out to me where she crossed my boundaries. While I can't remember what the actual argument was about, I remember the result. I'm not good at arguing at all, nor am I comfortable doing so despite how many I get into. My older sibling asked her to talk through the issue with me with I was happy to do, but remember, I'm not good with words. I asked her to talk through text instead so we could cool our heads and sort through our thoughts. She protested at first before agreeing. While I was typing out my grevienxes and trying to fix the problem, she plopped a chair in front of me and tried to talk it out with words instead. I left obviously and was extremely upset that she crossed my boundaries like that. It may seem minor but I couldn't help but notice that she regularly crossed my family's boundaries after that incident.
One of her most extreme changes was the way she dressed. She began to favor more tight dresses and occasionally pants(my family is not in the school of thought that allows wearing pants only). Since I go to the same school as her, I witnessed firsthand how she would go out of her way to hide the fact that she wore pants only from my mom, from wearing a skirt to school just to take it off later or covering it with a long cardigan. She knew for a fact that my mom would be upset and tried to hide it. When she was eventually busted, a long argument following it, she promised not to do it again. She tried to be more sneaky about it, especially around me, but I eventually caught her once again. Me and my siblings resorted to hiding the pants for a while but eventually had to return them.
At this point, we had multiple interventions just for her behavior. She even had behavioral therapy scheduled even if she protested going sometimes. I'm not sure if she is still going to this day. It's no surprise that she had some oddities with her behavior since my whole family is on the spectrum, but everyone else calmed down with age. She just takes it to new heights.
The final straw was when me and my siblings found her on social media when she left without permission, again. She blocked us and anyone that followed us from all her social media accounts, which should have been suspect. Turns out, she was wearing tight, figure revealing clothing, showing her hair, and her neck and chest were on full display. Almost all of the videos were her lip syncing to music with makeup on. One that especially shocked us was a suggestive video she posted. Note that her accounts are NOT private, so anyone could see this. She knows that doing all that she was doing is haram given that she tried her hardest make sure we didn't find out.
Me and my siblings are planning to contront her about the social media posts she made next week, but I'm not sure how effective it will be. We already made plans to make some of her behavior harder for her to do again by inconvenienting her whenever she does it, but I know it will end up in her blowing up over it. I was warned specifically to not engage with her because she likes picking problems/taking her frustrations out on me the most because I am the closest to her age.
As you noticed throughout this post, if you confront her directly about her actions she'll take it as an argument, so is there any way to subtly influence her behavior without her noticing? Or just anything to help guide her onto the right path?
Tldr: My sister is consistantly misbehaving and its just getting worse the longer its left alone. I need help or just any advice with how to help her stop misbehaving. Any suggestions would be appreciated.

Dear M&M,
This is a list of what the nasty "JE"rk has done to me over decades. Now I'm writing this out bc I would like you to know how he has manipulated and hurt me throughout my life. Mostly, to show you that he went to extremes bc my love for you was all encompassing. When he would put me under hypnosis I wouldn't relent. I wouldn't stop loving you. And he beat me up for it. Look, my sweet M&M, I don't want you to feel like you owe me anything. Or that you have to love me. No, I just want to clear the air finally. To bring truth to what was done. You deserve that. You went through so much as well. And I would love to keep this kind of stuff private but he took that away and im left to tell the world our story so you can at least know i never gave up on you. Bc a part of me knows you never gave up on me. Also, if anyone reads this I'm healed enough to talk about everything. Don't be sad for me. I'm a super resilient person at this point and mentally tough.💪
So here it goes ok, things that happened to me that he did:

1. He raped me along with other men.
2. He told me never to say anything or he would kill me and hurt you.
3. He said he would break us up if I said anything.
4. Later, after he was appointed the investigator of the gang rape he took me and used hypnosis and torture, so as to keep me from telling the truth.
5. Him and his buddies took me to a room to discuss how they were going to destroy "evidence" which was me. Someone mentioned "get her to kill herself". So JE used hypnosis and he almost succeeded except I was found on time. It was clear he needed me to appear crazy and suggested everything that happened was bc of my past. It was part of the script I was supposed to say.
6. It became clear you wanted justice and didn't know who JE really was. He had to block my memories by taking me to a hotel where he used torture and hypnosis at the same time. He repeatedly raped me at the hotel. 7. After several weekends I lost all conscious awareness of who you were M&M. You would appear and I wouldn't know your name or that we had a relationship.
7. He constantly blocked you and the investigation and turned it around on you M&M.
8. He used hypnosis on me to say you sexually assaulted me. I was being questioned in the same room that JE and the other men raped me. My supervisor was getting tired of waiting around bc I kept telling them "he didn't do anything wrong"... once my supervisor left JE brought out the gold chain (hypnosis) and recorded me saying you sexually assaulted me.
9. At this point I was trained with the hypnosis, but I fought hard for you. JE also used hypnosis on other woman and they accused you too.
10. He made sure to continue to degrade me to my supervisor and I got a "15" bc he insisted I was out of line for what happened between you and me..(SMH).
11. He took possession of all my paperwork and destroyed everything connected to you M&M. He destroyed every memory of us, and every picture. He destroyed "US".
12. He did various things to other women I'm not going to mention here.
13. He made up lies about my past to use and weaponize against me and you, or suggest it was for my protection he went to this extreme.
14. All communication between us both was severely compromised. I never received anything from you. He would make me dictate letters and write them out under hypnosis.
15. He forwarded all my mail to his home.
16. He has been monitoring my online activities since online became a thing.
17. Through hypnosis he was able to manage to get me into relationships that destroyed my self esteem and worth even moreso. This, bc he knew you were waiting it out. Even this last time with my ex husband. Relationships I would have never entered but he intervened.
18. He kept me from my Gd.
19. Throughout the time he took possession of me he painted himself as my boyfriend to others so that they wouldn't believe he was part of the gang rape or that he was continuing to rape me.
20. I was hypnotized to play a role and pretend that I wanted to be with him. That I loved him etc.
21. People found out so he put more pressure on me and really did such a number on me mentally that I would never know you M&M (not getting into how he tortured me to lose all conscious awareness of ever knowing you M&M)
22. He's most likely kept recordings and records of this as he plays for life, since what he did was catastrophic. Too many people found out the truth. I have my mind and voice back, which is the real truth.
23. He intervened with any success I could have had from going to grad school, including failing a class, gre,... having to leave prestigious work positions bc I didn't know why I was severely suffering from ptsd... bc part of the script is keeping me down. Too much clout and he won't be believed if I succeeded professionally.
24. My kiddo dude... this one kills me. I was kept down so much I hardly had the strength to fight anymore.
25. I was never going to remember you but I did... and I'm so very grateful 🙏 now. Bc I know what love really is. I have that at least.

There's a lot more but that would be longer and this is loonngg..
So dude, that's some of it. Just sad that I can't really discuss this in private with you bc he has compromised so much of my communication with you. The goal was for me to never know you or that I loved you so that I could clear your name and tell the truth of what was really done to us both.

Dear M&M,
This is a list of what the nasty "JE"rk has done to me over decades. Now I'm writing this out bc I would like you to know how he has manipulated and hurt me throughout my life. Mostly, to show you that he went to extremes bc my love for you was all encompassing. When he would put me under hypnosis I wouldn't relent. I wouldn't stop loving you. And he beat me up for it. Look, my sweet M&M, I don't want you to feel like you owe me anything. Or that you have to love me. No, I just want to clear the air finally. To bring truth to what was done. You deserve that. You went through so much as well. And I would love to keep this kind of stuff private but he took that away and im left to tell the world our story so you can at least know i never gave up on you. Bc a part of me knows you never gave up on me. Also, if anyone reads this I'm healed enough to talk about everything. Don't be sad for me. I'm a super resilient person at this point and mentally tough.💪
So here it goes ok, things that happened to me that he did:

1. He raped me along with other men.
2. He told me never to say anything or he would kill me and hurt you.
3. He said he would break us up if I said anything.
4. Later, after he was appointed the investigator of the gang rape he took me and used hypnosis and torture, so as to keep me from telling the truth.
5. Him and his buddies took me to a room to discuss how they were going to destroy "evidence" which was me. Someone mentioned "get her to kill herself". So JE used hypnosis and he almost succeeded except I was found on time. It was clear he needed me to appear crazy and suggested everything that happened was bc of my past. It was part of the script I was supposed to say.
6. It became clear you wanted justice and didn't know who JE really was. He had to block my memories by taking me to a hotel where he used torture and hypnosis at the same time. He repeatedly raped me at the hotel. 7. After several weekends I lost all conscious awareness of who you were M&M. You would appear and I wouldn't know your name or that we had a relationship.
7. He constantly blocked you and the investigation and turned it around on you M&M.
8. He used hypnosis on me to say you sexually assaulted me. I was being questioned in the same room that JE and the other men raped me. My supervisor was getting tired of waiting around bc I kept telling them "he didn't do anything wrong"... once my supervisor left JE brought out the gold chain (hypnosis) and recorded me saying you sexually assaulted me.
9. At this point I was trained with the hypnosis, but I fought hard for you. JE also used hypnosis on other woman and they accused you too.
10. He made sure to continue to degrade me to my supervisor and I got a "15" bc he insisted I was out of line for what happened between you and me..(SMH).
11. He took possession of all my paperwork and destroyed everything connected to you M&M. He destroyed every memory of us, and every picture. He destroyed "US".
12. He did various things to other women I'm not going to mention here.
13. He made up lies about my past to use and weaponize against me and you, or suggest it was for my protection he went to this extreme.
14. All communication between us both was severely compromised. I never received anything from you. He would make me dictate letters and write them out under hypnosis.
15. He forwarded all my mail to his home.
16. He has been monitoring my online activities since online became a thing.
17. Through hypnosis he was able to manage to get me into relationships that destroyed my self esteem and worth even moreso. This, bc he knew you were waiting it out. Even this last time with my ex husband. Relationships I would have never entered but he intervened.
18. He kept me from my Gd.
19. Throughout the time he took possession of me he painted himself as my boyfriend to others so that they wouldn't believe he was part of the gang rape or that he was continuing to rape me.
20. I was hypnotized to play a role and pretend that I wanted to be with him. That I loved him etc.
21. People found out so he put more pressure on me and really did such a number on me mentally that I would never know you M&M (not getting into how he tortured me to lose all conscious awareness of ever knowing you M&M)
22. He's most likely kept recordings and records of this as he plays for life, since what he did was catastrophic. Too many people found out the truth. I have my mind and voice back, which is the real truth.
23. He intervened with any success I could have had from going to grad school, including failing a class, gre,... having to leave prestigious work positions bc I didn't know why I was severely suffering from ptsd... bc part of the script is keeping me down. Too much clout and he won't be believed if I succeeded professionally.
24. My kiddo dude... this one kills me. I was kept down so much I hardly had the strength to fight anymore.
25. I was never going to remember you but I did... and I'm so very grateful 🙏 now. Bc I know what love really is. I have that at least.

There's a lot more but that would be longer and this is loonngg..
So dude, that's some of it. Just sad that I can't really discuss this in private with you bc he has compromised so much of my communication with you. The goal was for me to never know you or that I loved you so that I could clear your name and tell the truth of what was really done to us both.

Dear M&M,
This is a list of what the nasty "JE"rk has done to me over decades. Now I'm writing this out bc I would like you to know how he has manipulated and hurt me throughout my life. Mostly, to show you that he went to extremes bc my love for you was all encompassing. When he would put me under hypnosis I wouldn't relent. I wouldn't stop loving you. And he beat me up for it. Look, my sweet M&M, I don't want you to feel like you owe me anything. Or that you have to love me. No, I just want to clear the air finally. To bring truth to what was done. You deserve that. You went through so much as well. And I would love to keep this kind of stuff private but he took that away and im left to tell the world our story so you can at least know i never gave up on you. Bc a part of me knows you never gave up on me. Also, if anyone reads this I'm healed enough to talk about everything. Don't be sad for me. I'm a super resilient person at this point and mentally tough.💪
So here it goes ok, things that happened to me that he did:

1. He raped me along with other men.
2. He told me never to say anything or he would kill me and hurt you.
3. He said he would break us up if I said anything.
4. Later, after he was appointed the investigator of the gang rape he took me and used hypnosis and torture, so as to keep me from telling the truth.
5. Him and his buddies took me to a room to discuss how they were going to destroy "evidence" which was me. Someone mentioned "get her to kill herself". So JE used hypnosis and he almost succeeded except I was found on time. It was clear he needed me to appear crazy and suggested everything that happened was bc of my past. It was part of the script I was supposed to say.
6. It became clear you wanted justice and didn't know who JE really was. He had to block my memories by taking me to a hotel where he used torture and hypnosis at the same time. He repeatedly raped me at the hotel. 7. After several weekends I lost all conscious awareness of who you were M&M. You would appear and I wouldn't know your name or that we had a relationship.
7. He constantly blocked you and the investigation and turned it around on you M&M.
8. He used hypnosis on me to say you sexually assaulted me. I was being questioned in the same room that JE and the other men raped me. My supervisor was getting tired of waiting around bc I kept telling them "he didn't do anything wrong"... once my supervisor left JE brought out the gold chain (hypnosis) and recorded me saying you sexually assaulted me.
9. At this point I was trained with the hypnosis, but I fought hard for you. JE also used hypnosis on other woman and they accused you too.
10. He made sure to continue to degrade me to my supervisor and I got a "15" bc he insisted I was out of line for what happened between you and me..(SMH).
11. He took possession of all my paperwork and destroyed everything connected to you M&M. He destroyed every memory of us, and every picture. He destroyed "US".
12. He did various things to other women I'm not going to mention here.
13. He made up lies about my past to use and weaponize against me and you, or suggest it was for my protection he went to this extreme.
14. All communication between us both was severely compromised. I never received anything from you. He would make me dictate letters and write them out under hypnosis.
15. He forwarded all my mail to his home.
16. He has been monitoring my online activities since online became a thing.
17. Through hypnosis he was able to manage to get me into relationships that destroyed my self esteem and worth even moreso. This, bc he knew you were waiting it out. Even this last time with my ex husband. Relationships I would have never entered but he intervened.
18. He kept me from my Gd.
19. Throughout the time he took possession of me he painted himself as my boyfriend to others so that they wouldn't believe he was part of the gang rape or that he was continuing to rape me.
20. I was hypnotized to play a role and pretend that I wanted to be with him. That I loved him etc.
21. People found out so he put more pressure on me and really did such a number on me mentally that I would never know you M&M (not getting into how he tortured me to lose all conscious awareness of ever knowing you M&M)
22. He's most likely kept recordings and records of this as he plays for life, since what he did was catastrophic. Too many people found out the truth. I have my mind and voice back, which is the real truth.
23. He intervened with any success I could have had from going to grad school, including failing a class, gre,... having to leave prestigious work positions bc I didn't know why I was severely suffering from ptsd... bc part of the script is keeping me down. Too much clout and he won't be believed if I succeeded professionally.
24. My kiddo dude... this one kills me. I was kept down so much I hardly had the strength to fight anymore.
25. I was never going to remember you but I did... and I'm so very grateful 🙏 now. Bc I know what love really is. I have that at least.

There's a lot more but that would be longer and this is loonngg..
So dude, that's some of it. Just sad that I can't really discuss this in private with you bc he has compromised so much of my communication with you. The goal was for me to never know you or that I loved you so that I could clear your name and tell the truth of what was really done to us both.

Throwaway account for obvious reasons. I’m at a loss and have been on SA hotlines all day searching for what I should do here so wanted to crowdsource some feedback in case other people know how I feel and have good advice. WARNING: I will be talking about my ex emotionally abusing and SAing me. I won’t go into specifics per the rules but giving a heads up for anyone who that may trigger rn, please don’t read on.
I started dating this guy when we were in high school (I was 14, he was 19) and got locked into a dynamic I wish I could’ve left sooner. Today, I would identify it as grooming and abusive. He took advantage of my loneliness, my budding sexuality, and my love for him for close to five years. He was manipulative, he used his mental health crises as a way to control me. He would say I was the “only one who understands” him and say he’d kill himself if our relationship ended. At the time I felt filthy and ashamed, but looking back I realize that I was trying to blame myself for a situation I didn’t want to be in. I finally was able to pull away completely while I was in college and I never looked back.
Over the years, I’ve mostly not thought of him but I get these weird little jump-scares in my brain of memories of things that happened when I was with him. It briefly got worse when I moved in with my current (very supportive, loving, and age-appropriate) partner. But on the whole, my traumatized brain can’t actively remember much of our relationship, and what I do remember, I try my best not to think about.
I am now almost 30. It’s been 10 years since I’ve had any contact with him and out of the blue, he messaged me on Facebook. It’s very brief and non-specific which is part of what freaks me out about it. Basically what he said is “hi it’s (HIS NAME). I’m not trying to reconnect or be friends again. I need to talk to you about something. Please get back to me if you’re willing.”
I’ve been spinning out about what to do about this. In an ideal world, I never speak to, see, or hear from him again. My first instinct is to block and delete, but he is not a well person and had harassed me in the past. After speaking to the RAINN hotline, I’m thinking maybe I should just be tracking and noting what he’s saying to me so if I need a protection order, I have receipts.
My second thought is what could he possibly NEED to tell me that he couldn’t open with. I wondered if it could be sexual health-related, but I’ve been tested multiple times in the decade since him so even if “I had chlamydia the whole time” is what he has to say to me, that’s his problem, not mine.
I now feel terrified that maybe he has some collateral or is trying to blackmail me. Though I don’t remember much of the relationship, I do remember sending him nudes on Snapchat which maybe he saved. Like I said, it was a coercive dynamic and I’m not proud of it. A big part of the reason I didn’t report at the time is I read somewhere that I would be liable for distributing underage porn even though the images were of me and I was the victim in question. Or did he film us having sex without me knowing and post it somewhere, something like that.
He struggled with substance abuse and mental health issues the whole time I knew him. He was even briefly hospitalized for it. So it crossed my mind that maybe he’s reaching out during a stable time to “make amends,” either through a program or by himself.
What I really want is to give him a piece of my mind. It was never my intention to open a door to him or speak to him again. But now that he’s invited himself in, I want to ask him who the hell he thinks he is reaching out to me. I want to forget I ever met him, but I want him to remember what he did to me every day and feel sorry for it. I want him to know that I don’t just think of him as my ex, but as my rapist and that if he ever contacts me again, I’m calling the police (which is what RAINN suggested I do).
But I don’t know what I should do to be healthy and safe while moving forward. My current partner doesn’t know about this, I’ve only mentioned it in the abstract in the past and he never pushed me to say more. I want to tell him but I still feel so much shame about it and still secretly fear that this is all my fault and makes me unlovable.
I have an appointment with my therapist this weekend and best believe this will be the whole hour this week. But I’m looking for any thoughts from others who don’t live in my head on what you’d do if you were me. How would you go about disclosing this whole situation to your partner? Would you tell family and friends? If anyone on here has been a victim of revenge porn (especially if you were underage) and is willing to share your experiences, I’d love to hear from you. Words of encouragement would also be appreciated. Thanks in advance.
Tldr: my abusive ex vaguely reached out to me and idk what to do about it.

Before I start, I don’t have any malicious intentions towards my stepmom despite of everything but I feel conflicted on what decisions I should make.
My (19F) stepmom (32F) came into my life around 3 years ago. However, she and my dad had been acquainted for a few years prior. My first impression of her was her attempts to home-wreck my dad’s previous relationship with my sister’s mother, this happened on a trip we all made to our home country back in 2019, from that moment I had the feeling she would be bad news. Fast forward a few months, my dad broke things off with his previous wife for unrelated reasons, and as a way to grieve the relationship he was taking many trips to our country, spending astronomical amounts of money, buying cars, building houses, and overall was a financial mess, nonetheless he had a lot of women trying to be with him due to his “money”. Stepmom was aware of this and started pursuing my dad as well. She is a beautiful woman and if we combine that with the fact my dad’s ex-wife had just announced she was pregnant and married someone else, he was making even horrible decisions.
Two weeks into my dad’s and stepmom’s relationship she decided to propose to him and unexpectedly quit her job and made my dad buy her a flight to come back to the states with him. I was 16 and felt heartbroken that my dad took so many life changing decisions without speaking with me first, regardless of this I tried my hardest to make her feel comfortable since from my POV she could make my dad happy again. Fast forward a few days, we found out she was pregnant, although she only had a visitor’s visa she was making all of her doctor’s appointments here and we found out how far along she was. My baby sister was born and I wasn’t home the day of their discharge from the hospital because I had school in the morning and my friend who has lost her dad the day prior asked me to be there for her. This lady threw a whole tantrum at her old age, she was complaining to my dad telling him i’m a horrible person, she would ignore me in the house every time she saw me and would even go as far as telling me to not hold her baby. I’m the type of person who likes to avoid confrontation with those I live with simply to maintain the peace in the household, so I just ignored her antics.
From that moment on, I stopped trying to please her and our relationship became strictly common pleasantries but I noticed she would only do that whenever my dad was around, otherwise I would go back to being ignored in every sense of the word. I became uncomfortable in my own home so I would rarely go out of my room and I started eating at school or at work. She was a stay at home mom and was in charge of all the chores aside from anything related to me such as my room, my laundry, and things of the sort. This absolutely was a problem for her and began complaining once again that I don’t help her around the house and that as a woman it was my responsibility to help with all of the chores. I get that being a new mom can be stressful, but the baby spent Monday to Friday from 9am to 4pm at daycare, and I was a full time high school student with a full time job, I was rarely ever in the house and her demands were pretty unreasonable. After that we became kind of like two roommates who disliked each other, and yet I never mentioned anything to my dad for the sake of his newfound happiness.
I even went as far as to offer her a job at my current company so she could have something to do besides being at home all day long, she only worked like 15hrs a week and would be incredibly demanding, expressing her frustration when she wouldn’t get the easy positions, my coworkers would complain that she would turn a blind eye every time it was her turn to pay gas for the shared rides, and my boss told me she was walking around telling everyone she was only with my dad for papers and that she would leave him the moment she got her way.
Fast-forward 2 months before my baby sister turned 2 years old, my dad found her having an affair with her ex-fiancé, throughout the whole argument my dad was restlessly screaming at her for answers and she remained stone cold, not one tear or sign of remorse. I was the only one crying over the situation. She made the decision to call her affair partner in front of my dad and asked him to pick her up, the guy told her he would call her in minute and proceeded to block her everywhere. My dad was the sole provider therefore he confiscated her phone and threw all of her clothes on the front yard. Going through her phone he found out that she made arrangements to stay with an aunt in NY for a few days, so he gave it back and told her to go on her merry way.
One week after she left my dad received a call from his mother in law begging him to pick my stepmom and sister up and to allow them to come back home since they were uncomfortable with their living situation, and so he did. She only stayed for maybe 2 days before they returned to NY. At this point, she had spent all of her savings in Ubers and was asking her mom for money since she couldn’t ask my dad anymore.
As I stablished before the girl cannot keep her mouth shut. One time she was scheduled to work with my best friend from school, I had also brought him to work with me, she began to ran her mouth telling him that I was disgusting and that I didn’t help her around the house, and many more mean things. The moment she got dropped off home he called and told me everything, this was my last straw. I gave my dad the ultimatum that either she leaves or I would and he told me that he cannot simply throw her out of the house… So I packed my bags and left to stay with my cousin who lives a few houses down. I stayed there for about two weeks until I felt guilty about making my dad worry, especially since he is diabetic and cannot be put under too much stress. I came back home and the next day I noticed both my baby sister’s and stepmom’s toothbrushes were missing and I just assumed she left again. My dad told me she left for NY for a third time but there was no communication for like 2 whole days until a friend of hers called saying she and the baby were there in Atlanta and was asking what was going on. Apparently my stepmom had been telling everyone that my dad and her got separated because he was being abusive to her. My best guess is that she was only coming back and forward to gather any type of evidence she could, but at the end of the day my dad never laid a finger on her, he only ever talked to her aggressively when he found out about her affair.
I honestly thought this was the last we would hear from her but today in my dad’s and hers shared back account he noticed a transaction of immigration fees and lawyers made by her. He is trying to expedite the divorce proceedings because he doesn’t want her using his name to get her green card but our city is incredibly busy and these sort of processes take their time. When he mentioned this to me I brought to his attention that she might be going for the VAWA method by telling immigration authorities she was a victim of abuse. However, that leaves my dad standing as an abuser and we don’t want that either.
My dad is one of the kindest souls ever, he fought for me when I was being physically and mentally abused by my mom, he sends money to our family back home (which is something that bothered her as well), he refused to press charges when she basically kidnapped my baby sister, he refuses to call ICE on her for marriage fraud. I don’t think he deserves this, and I’m no authority on who gets to stay in this country and who doesn’t but I don’t want her to stay her by painting my dad as this abuser he isn’t.
PN: There has been doubt on my baby sister’s legitimacy as my dad’s daughter. My dad confided in me that he was not sure the dates matched up. Later, I found the instagram of my stepmom’s affair partner and I discovered that he was in our home country at the same time as my dad. Also the baby has none of my dad’s features but share eerily similar traits to the affair partner and his kids. I won’t confirm or deny anything since she is an innocent baby in all of this chaos and I love her with all of my heart.
Should I contact immigration services and tell them my side of the story before she discredits my dad?

Disclaimer: This is part Cry-For-Help, part New-User-Warning, and part Complaint. If you're the type of person who gets emotionally charged when others complain, you should probably ignore the ego and click the "Back" button.
I'm starting to feel a little worried about using TiddlyWiki to house my 'Personal Knowledge Database'. It is reminding me of software that used to have a good deal of support, but doesn't anymore? Examples:

1. Whenever I check this reddit, there are 2 people 'online', and almost no one making posts.
2. talk.tiddlywiki.org (TiddlyWiki Main Help Site?) appears to be just as dead.
3. Googling issues returns results from 5-16 years ago.
   1. When I google "tiddlywiki how to insert comments" the first result is: https://groups.google.com/g/tiddlywiki/c/O0AvfwN6ByM, (which is from 2008!) and is just a bunch of people NOT answering that question. "How to insert comments" should be an extremely simple answer. Yes I know it is listed elsewhere - that's not the point.
4. The Help Documentation on the Main Site (tiddlywiki.com) often completely lacks true example code, or has such incomplete code that it makes me think they made a "first pass" and then never actually went back to flesh it out. Documentation should always include various Use-Case examples to get people started. TiddlyWiki documentation basically just tells you the syntax, and the accepted parameters/options, and maybe 1 or 2 extremely basic examples that do not depict any real use-cases.
5. To top it all off, the few guides/tutorials that seem to exist on various topics are written by people who assume you already know what you're doing. Either that, or they just aren't very good at giving packaged examples. Here is one issue I had to google, and the corresponding poor 'How To" guide that didn't help:
   1. Wrapping Images: https://talk.tiddlywiki.org/t/floating-images-howto/7393 - this 'tutorial' includes code, but assumes you already know what to do. It may not be completely obvious why this "How To" is terrible, but, if it were a cooking recipe, it would look like this:

Example of a BAD Tutorial
So you want to bake a cake? Here's how to make that happen:

1. eggs and whisking are a part of the process.
2. you can use different types of eggs
3. have fun! ~Mario

That's not a tutorial. That is a person named Mario spending 5 minutes to throw out some code that will only help people who already know what they're doing. The ridiculous part is, I am familiar with programming (python, javascript, LUA, HTML, CSS) - but even with that advantage compared to a completely new user, I still don't magically know how to combine Mario's haphazard code blocks into TiddlyWiki's structure.
Tutorials SHOULD be written like recipes:
Intro: If you want to include one tiddler in the text body of another tiddler, follow the steps below:
A) Create a Tiddler note
B) Name it "My_Test_Note"
C) Copy and Paste the following text into it:
This is some example text. Paste me directly into the Tiddler you just created named "Test".
D) Save that Tiddler (Ctrl+Enter) or click Check Mark button.
E) Create another new Tiddler note
F) Name it "My_Output"
G) Copy and Paste the following code into it:
{{My_Test_Note}}
H) Save that Tiddler too.
Explanation: Notice how the text from My_Test_Note is 'transcluded' into the Tiddler named "My_Output". This is called "Transclusion".
Even the Grok TiddlyWiki suffers from the problem of having too many words and not enough copy-paste-able examples.
CONCLUSION
I'm going to try sticking with TiddlyWiki if I can, but I just thought it was useful for new users to be warned about what they're getting into here:

I believe TiddlyWiki has a huge amount of potential (for power-users who already know how to use it), but if you aren't familiar with programming, or don't want to google every single tiny issue and sift through post after post from 16 years ago, or read tutorials written by people who can't explain how to bake a cake, then it may not be right for you.

Round 1, Pick 8 - Michael Penix Jr., QB, Washington:
NFL: I’m not sure anyone expected Atlanta, which signed Kirk Cousins to a four-year, $180 million deal in March, to take a quarterback in the top 10, but here we are. Penix is a big-time playmaker who is the top deep-ball passer in this class. He has surgical precision and throws with good anticipation from the pocket.
CBS Sports: B-. They opted to take their quarterback of the future by taking Penix. He has all the tools, but will learn and wait behind Kirk Cousins. I wonder if he can rush the passer. Like the player, but don’t like the pick.
ESPN: Stunner. The Falcons pulled off the shocker of the first round, taking Penix earlier than just about every expert predicted. He was the fourth quarterback taken in the top 10. There's no doubt Atlanta saw something in Penix when watching him on tape and visiting him. The team sent a ton of staff to see him in recent weeks. Obviously, they felt comfortable with his durability, despite four season-ending injuries in college. Penix, a lefty, has an incredible arm, and from a skill standpoint, he's certainly right up there among the best signal callers on the board. And now he's the successor to Kirk Cousins.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: Has devoted his life to the church of the flying spaghetti monster.
Round 2, Pick 35 - Ruke Orhorhoro, DT, Clemson:
NFL: Another trade, with the Falcons swooping up. And this is their second curious pick of this draft. Nothing against Orhorhoro, who has some intriguing skills and might be a better stat stuffer in the NFL than he was at Clemson. But with Johnny Newton on the board, this pick felt like a reach when you consider Atlanta's biggest need -- pass rush.
CBS Sports: B. Big, long, powerful interior rusher without many pass-rush moves. But his traits shine against the run and has enough explosion to win between gaps or with bull rushes. Expensive trade up though hurts his grade despite Falcons filling a need with quality prospect.
ESPN: The Falcons needed a pass-rusher, particularly an EDGE. Most of the impact players at that position went in the first round. Atlanta attempted to trade back into the late first, but weren't able to do so. Instead, the Falcons took Orhorhoro, a defensive tackle who has pass-rushing chops from the inside. Since 2021, Orhorhoro had 9.5 sacks lined up as a DT, which were tied for third in the ACC. The Nigeria-born Orhorhoro didn't start playing football until he was a junior in high school, so the Falcons probably like his upside.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: His bright green fanny pack when traveling is a must.
Round 3, Pick 74 - Bralen Trice, LB, Washington:
NFL: Trice was a consistent pressure source the past two years for the Huskies but had a rough pre-draft process when he shed a bunch of weight for the NFL Scouting Combine but failed to display better speed because of it. Trice was smart to bulk back up for his pro day because I think his game is predicated on winning with a combination of effort and surprising pop in his hands.
CBS Sports: A-. Bad testing hurt his stock but this is as productive of an EDGE as there is in this class. Slippery with pass-rush plans galore. Smaller than his listed weight and doesn’t have serious burst. Flashes of bend though.
ESPN: The Falcons got their pure pass-rusher and, boy, did they need it. This is a team that has had 18 fewer sacks than any other franchise in the NFL over the past three seasons. Atlanta's pass rush win rate was dead last in the league in 2023. Trice had 16 sacks over the past two seasons, which was tied for the fourth most among Power 5 players during that stretch. He's had 12 games with five or more pressures since the start of the 2022 season, which leads all FBS players. Trice played mostly outside linebacker at Washington and he had a reputation for being able to get to the quarterback.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: Smells like Celestial Seasonings sleepy-time tea.
Round 4, Pick 109 - Brandon Dorlus, DT, Oregon:
NFL: Round 4 is for the Ducks. I haven't followed the Falcons' logic on every one of their selections this year, but I like Dorlus here. He can play multiple spots along the D-line and be a movable piece for Raheem Morris' unit.
CBS Sports: A-. Fun, twitchy and thick “tweener” who can literally win at any alignment along the defensive line. Isn’t the most sudden, nor the best with his hands but is so slippery between blockers. Overall athletic profile is impressive. Rushes can get too high, doesn’t play with much power. Can get washed out vs. the run. Has frame to add more weight.
ESPN: It was somewhat surprising the Falcons didn't take a cornerback here or even a safety. But the team is clearly and rapidly reshaping its defensive line, which already had quality veteran players in Grady Jarrett and David Onyemata. Dorlus is Atlanta's second straight defensive line selection. And Dorlus, who led Oregon with five sacks, is extremely versatile. He can play inside, as a defensive end or even outside linebacker. Pass-rushers were the Falcons' biggest needs and now they have three rookies who fit the bill after not taking a defender with the No. 8 overall pick as many expected.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: Wants you to call your family and tell them you love and cherish them.
Round 5, Pick 143 - JD Bertrand, LB, Notre Dame:
NFL: An Atlanta native, Bertrand is a coach's dream in spite of his subpar length and injury history. He's instinctive and tough and carries a hard-hat mentality to work every day.
CBS Sports: C. So active, so smart. Always around the ball. Reads his keys in a flash. Block-avoider. Ascending coverage skill just minimal ball production at Notre Dame. High tackling numbers but also misses many.
ESPN: The Falcons are completely reshaping their front seven in this draft. In Bertrand, they not only get their second collegiate defensive team captain (Bralen Trice was captain at Washington), but also someone with significant physical tools. Bertrand was a three-year starter at Notre Dame, led the team with 76 tackles in 2023 and had 16 tackles behind the line of scrimmage this past season. He's also a former Eagle Scout and was a finalist for the Wuerffel Trophy for community service.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: Prefers to code in Notepad with the wingding font.
Round 6, Pick 186 - Jase McClellan, RB, Alabama:
NFL: McClellan is a power back who runs with great toughness and exercises great ball security, fumbling only once in college on nearly 400 touches. But he's a one-dimensional runner on a team pretty loaded at running back.
CBS Sports: C+. Jack of all trades, master of none with minimal mileage on his legs. Will run away from some slower defenders but not a true burner. Receiving ability is there. Vision is a strength between the tackles. Elusive but not special in that regard. Classic scatback.
ESPN: The team needed a third running back behind Bijan Robinson and Tyler Allgeier, and that's presumably where McClellan will fit. McClellan was Alabama's primary starter for one year after returning in 2022 from a torn ACL. He ran for 890 yards on 180 carries with eight touchdowns this past season. McClellan, who's only 21, isn't flashy, but Atlanta has been taking upside and translatable physical attributes over flash this entire draft.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: Kept calling the NFL at 800-635-5300 to complain about the refs.
Round 6, Pick 187 - Casey Washington, WR, Illinois:
NFL: A strong pro day helped solidify Washington as a draft pick. He looks like a solid, reliable possession receiver with natural route-running skills, but he's not special at any one thing.
CBS Sports: C. Good sized outside WR who plays with a throwback style. Jump balls, back-shoulders, etc. are his speciality. Good speed for his size too. Just doesn’t have the bend or suddenness to separate consistently.
ESPN: Depth at wide receiver was absolutely a need going into the draft, though it's still surprising the Falcons won't pick a cornerback until their final pick, if at all. Washington was sixth in the Big Ten in receiving yards during conference games (589) and finished his career with Illinois very strong -- 218 yards on nine receptions and three touchdowns against Northwestern back in November. Washington is 6-foot-2 and 200 pounds, and Atlanta did need size at the position. He'll be tied for the second tallest wide receiver on the roster after top wideout Drake London (6-4).
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: Taught his goldfish to play fetch. Not the most exciting game but they’re happy.
Round 6, Pick 197 - Zion Logue, DT, Georgia:
NFL: Logue was a flash player for the two-time champion Bulldogs, often stuck behind a ton of talent in Athens. His length is outstanding, even if his production (1.5 sacks in 50-plus college games) isn't.
CBS Sports: C+. Big, long, thick SEC-tested DL with some above-average burst for his size and a pass-rush move every so often. Production never matched his size or athleticism.
ESPN: This draft, after all the controversy in the first round, was all about front-seven versatility and depth for the Falcons. Logue is a big body at 6-foot-6 and 314 pounds. And the team's fifth front-seven selection of the week. Atlanta has put a premium on length with its defenders so far and Logue has that to go along with his massive frame. The Tennessee native only started one year at Georgia, so he's relatively inexperienced with potential upside the Falcons are once again banking on.
NFL Absolutely Not Fake News: Can eat twenty scones in a single sitting.

In the annals of gaming history, few titles command the reverence and adoration as the legendary Doom franchise. Born from the minds of John Romero, John Carmack, Adrian Carmack, and Tom Hall, Doom would go on to lay the foundations for just about every modern video game that exists. It was a true tour de force, a success story few could scarce ever imagine.
Released in 1993, Doom was an immediate smash hit, thanks in no small part to its shareware format, which allowed users to experience the first few levels of Knee Deep In the Dead, and then order the full game via the phone number included. Players could then share the floppy disk with their friends, and so on, and so on. It was a truly revolutionary system, and within a single year, Doom had sold over 2 million copies.
The history of the Doom franchise is one of innovation, ultra violence, and controversy (1999's Columbine High School Massacre), and that reputation is one that continued with 2016's DOOM. DOOM was officially revealed at Quakecon 2014, ten years after Doom 3. Players had long resigned to Doom being considered a dead franchise. A reboot had been in the works for a number of years prior, but never got released, having been quietly cancelled by id in 2010. The future was bleak, but the 30 second long teaser ignited a spark that had been burning dimmer every passing year.
Then came E3 2015.
The hype was unreal. The trailer had everything that fans could possibly want. Gore, intense violence, insane run n gun gameplay, a rip-roaring soundtrack and the MFING CHAINSAW. But fans had been let down before. Would it really hold up its promises?
Yes. Yes, it would.
PART I: Presentation
When DOOM burst onto the scene in 2016, it did so with a visual and auditory spectacle that left players awestruck. From the moment the game boots up, players are made aware that this is not your average shooter. You are greeted with a deep, commanding voice. "Rip and tear, until it is DONE."
Immediately, players are greeted with a scene of carnage and the Doom Slayer chained to a table, which, of course, he instantly breaks free from. A zombie attempts to relieve the Slayer of his life but is beaten to the punch with a prompt skull smashing. After putting the other zombies to rest, he interacts with the panel in the corner, is greeted by one Dr. Samuel Hayden, who attempts to justify the outbreak, and decides he would rather kill shit than listen to excuses and destroys the monitor.
That is the introduction to this game. It never wastes the player's time. We aren't here to listen to long droning monologues or watch MGS style cutscenes. id Software knew their audience, and knew what that audience wanted, and they deliver in spades. This introduction sets the tone for the entire experience: relentless action, unapologetic violence, and a protagonist who is as unstoppable as he is uncompromising. The Doom Slayer's disdain for exposition and his single-minded focus on annihilating demons resonate with players who crave a pure, unadulterated gaming experience.
By eschewing lengthy cutscenes and exposition-heavy dialogue in favor of fast-paced gameplay and visceral action, id Software delivers a game that respects the player's time and delivers exactly what they came for: non-stop demon-slaying action. In an era where many games are criticized for padding their runtime with unnecessary filler, DOOM stands out as a shining example of how to create a focused and engaging experience that keeps players coming back for more.
Rather than bombarding players with lengthy exposition or intrusive cutscenes, DOOM opts for a more environmental storytelling approach. Throughout the game, players can discover audio logs, read text-based terminals, and observe environmental details that provide context and background to the events unfolding around them.
The story of DOOM revolves around the Doom Slayer's mission to stop a demonic invasion unleashed by the Union Aerospace Corporation (UAC) on their Martian facility. As players progress through the game, they uncover details about the UAC's experiments with Hell energy, the origins of the demonic invasion, and the Doom Slayer's own mysterious past.
While the story may not be front and center in DOOM, it nonetheless adds depth and richness to the game world, enhancing the overall experience for players who choose to engage with it. And for those who prefer to focus solely on the action, the story remains secondary, allowing them to enjoy the game on their own terms.
That's all well and good, but what about the actual gameplay? Simply put, it is exhilarating. From the moment you are given control of the Slayer, players are thrust into a frenzy of blood and violence, and it never lets up. At its core, DOOM is a first-person shooter that harkens back to the genre's roots while injecting it with a healthy dose of modern flair. The gameplay is fast-paced, frenetic, and utterly unapologetic in its brutality. You're not just a player – you're the Doom Slayer, a force of nature hell-bent on eradicating every last demon in your path.
Central to the gameplay experience is the game's combat loop, which revolves around a delicate balance of aggression and strategy. In DOOM, there's no hiding behind cover or waiting for your health to regenerate – you're constantly on the move, strafing, dodging, and leaping across the battlefield as you unleash a torrent of bullets, rockets, and plasma upon your enemies.
Weapons include the iconic shotgun, heavy assault rifle, plasma rifle, rocket launcher, and the devastating BFG 9000, among others. Each weapon offers different firing modes, such as single shot, burst fire, and continuous beam, providing players with tactical options in combat. A key aspect of combat is the Glory Kill system, which allows players to perform brutal finishing moves on staggered enemies. Glory Kills not only provide health and ammo but also contribute to the flow of combat by encouraging aggressive play. It is incredibly satisfying to watch the Slayer rip an imp in half or stomp their head into the pavement, and doing so rewards you with a large return of health.
The Chainsaw mechanic is another integral part of combat, allowing players to instantly kill most enemies and gain a large amount of ammo in return. However, Chainsaw fuel is limited and must be managed carefully. Like Glory Kills, watching the chainsaw tear demons apart is incredibly satisfying. Certain demons require more fuel but provide the player with more ammo in return. Balancing which demons you chainsaw and which ones you choose to Glory Kill is an important part of combat.
Exploration is key to progression and is rewarding to those players who choose to do. Hidden throughout the levels of the game are Argent Cells, Praetor Tokens, and Rune Trials. Each of these provide upgrades to your health/shield/ammo, suit, and passive abilities respectively. Also hidden throughout the game are levers that lead you to classic levels from Doom 1 and Doom 2, which then unlock the full level of its respective game, playable from the main menu. You can also find toy models of the Doom Slayer, which unlock various character models to view. On some of these models, the Doom Slayer will perform a unique action when picking it up, such as fist bumping the classic Doomguy. It's a nice and cute little touch added by the developers that does a little to add character to the Slayer, who is a silent protagonist.
id Software masterfully blends modern game design with a deep reverence for the classics, paying homage to the series' storied history while introducing new elements that propel the franchise forward. Central to this approach is the game's character design, which strikes a delicate balance between nostalgia and innovation. At its core is the iconic protagonist, the Doom Slayer, whose design pays homage to the original Doom Marine while incorporating modern updates that make him feel both familiar and fresh. With his battle-worn armor, imposing stature, and silent demeanor, the Doom Slayer is the embodiment of raw power and unrelenting rage.
The game's roster of enemies is a veritable who's who of classic Doom foes, reimagined for the modern era. From the lowly possessed soldiers to the hulking Cyberdemon, each enemy is lovingly crafted to capture the essence of its 1990s counterpart while introducing new mechanics and behaviors that keep players on their toes. Whether you're facing off against the agile Revenants, the relentless Hell Knights, or the grotesque Cacodemons, every encounter is a nostalgic trip down memory lane, punctuated by the satisfying sound of demon flesh being torn asunder.
But the main story is not where it ends. DOOM has an arcade mode, where players can run through the levels again, this time trying for high scores and medals while collecting 1 Ups. It's important to move fast and have accurate aim; the more kills you chain together, the bigger your score is. Getting hit reduces your score. At the end of the level, your score is tallied against others on a leaderboard. It's a great way to incentivize players to keep playing, in order to get a better and better score.
There is also multiplayer, where players compete in various game modes such as classic deathmatch, warpath and free for all. Players can become demons by collecting runes on the battlefield and this gives them a distinct advantage; demons are larger, stronger and more resilient. Players are bizarrely restricted to only two weapons and a loadout in multiplayer, which blew my mind. Loadouts. In a DOOM game. The demons are also massively unbalanced and if one team manages to get a particularly powerful demon such as a baron of hell, then it's a guaranteed win. All in all, the multiplayer just isn't great. You are better off replaying the story or arcade mode, or even SnapMap.
SnapMap is id Software's proprietary level editor, and it puts every other editor on the market to shame. SnapMap is an incredible, intuitive, easy to learn system allowing players to create their own multiplayer, co-op and single player maps. There is an extensive tutorial system that teaches users the basics, and goes up in depth, covering how to use AI triggers, switches, combinations, object layering, actions, recalls, audio cues, etc. Never have I ever seen such an in-depth interface on a console game before. While it is only surface level in the grand scheme of things, SnapMap is a great introduction to teaching users how game development works, and I urge everyone to try it out at least once.
Part II: The Music
In DOOM, the music isn't just a background accompaniment – it's a driving force that propels players forward, electrifying every moment of the gameplay experience. Composed by the incredibly talented Mick Gordon, the soundtrack of DOOM is a relentless onslaught of metal and electronica that perfectly complements the game's fast-paced action and visceral combat. From the moment you boot up the game, you're greeted by the iconic strains of the main theme, a haunting melody that sets the tone for the epic journey that lies ahead. As you traverse the game's environments, the music shifts seamlessly between atmospheric ambience and pulse-pounding metal.
But it's not just the composition of the music that makes it so memorable – it's also the way it's integrated into the gameplay itself. Mick Gordon's dynamic scoring system ensures that the music evolves in real-time based on the player's actions, ramping up in intensity during combat encounters and dialing back during quieter moments of exploration. This creates a sense of momentum and flow that enhances the overall pacing of the game
One of the standout features of the soundtrack is its use of unconventional instrumentation and sound design. Mick Gordon's signature sound combines distorted guitars, pounding drums, and industrial noise to create a sonic palette that is as brutal and unforgiving as the game itself. From the deep, guttural growls of the synth bass to the ear-shredding shrieks of the guitar solos, every element of the music is designed to evoke a sense of chaos and destruction, mirroring the relentless carnage unfolding onscreen.
Of course, no discussion of the music in DOOM would be complete without mentioning the iconic tracks that have become synonymous with the game. From the adrenaline-fueled "Rip & Tear" to the bone-crushing "BFG Division," each track is a masterpiece of composition and production, perfectly capturing the essence of the DOOM experience and elevating it to new heights. Mick Gordon's composition for the DOOM soundtrack is a tour de force in heavy metal and industrial electronica, meticulously crafted to evoke the essence of the game's frenetic gameplay.
The backbone of the soundtrack is the distorted guitar, which provides the driving force behind many of the tracks. Gordon's use of extended-range guitars and custom-tuned instruments gives the music its signature low-end punch, while his aggressive playing style adds a raw, visceral energy to the sound. In addition to guitars, Gordon incorporates a wide range of electronic and synthetic elements into his compositions, including synthesizers, drum machines, and sampled sounds. These elements are used to create atmospheric textures, rhythmic patterns, and dynamic effects.
One of the most innovative aspects of Gordon's sound design is his use of audio manipulation techniques, such as granular synthesis and spectral processing. These techniques allow him to deconstruct and manipulate audio in real-time, creating complex textures and effects.
Perhaps the most revolutionary aspect of Mick Gordon's composition for DOOM is his dynamic scoring system, which adjusts the music in real-time based on the player's actions. This system, known as "MIDI-controlled dynamic music," allows the music to seamlessly transition between different layers and variations depending on the intensity of the gameplay. Gordon achieves this dynamic effect by dividing each track into multiple stems or layers, each representing a different element of the music (e.g., drums, guitars, synths). These stems are then triggered and mixed in real-time using MIDI data generated by the game engine, allowing the music to adapt and evolve dynamically as the player progresses through the game.
Part III: Building a Legacy
All too often in this industry, legacy franchises are either left in the dust to be forgotten, or brought back to a limp fanfare, only to be thrust back into the shadows of the past. This happens for a myriad of reasons, and I believe the biggest one is that they don't respect their legacy, and they don't respect the players who engage with them.
At its core, DOOM is a game that understands what players want: fast-paced action, engaging gameplay, and a sense of empowerment. By focusing on these core principles, id Software created an experience that resonated with players old and new, capturing the spirit of the original games while pushing the series forward. Central to this approach is the game's unwavering commitment to respecting the player. From its minimalist storytelling and streamlined level design to its intuitive controls and dynamic difficulty system, DOOM prioritizes the player's experience above all else, ensuring that every moment of the game is engaging, immersive, and satisfying.
One of the most notable ways that DOOM respects the player is through its approach to difficulty. Rather than imposing artificial barriers or punishing players for their mistakes, the game encourages experimentation and mastery through its responsive gameplay mechanics and adaptive enemy AI. Players are given the freedom to approach encounters in their own way, whether it's through brute force, cunning strategy, or a combination of both.
Another key aspect of DOOM's player-centric design is its emphasis on accessibility. From its difficulty settings and intuitive user interface to its robust accessibility features, such as colorblind modes and customizable controls, the game ensures that players of all skill levels and abilities can enjoy the experience without feeling excluded or overwhelmed.
But perhaps the most important way that DOOM respects the player is through its commitment to fun. At its core, DOOM is a game that prioritizes the player's enjoyment above all else, delivering a seamless and exhilarating experience that keeps players coming back for more. Whether you're blasting demons with a shotgun, exploring hidden secrets, or rocking out to Mick Gordon's pulse-pounding soundtrack, DOOM is a game that never stops prioritizing YOU.
DOOM's legacy is one of respect – respect for the player, respect for the franchise, and respect for the medium of video games as a whole. By prioritizing fun, accessibility, and player agency, id Software created an experience that not only honors the legacy of the original games but also sets a new standard for what a modern first-person shooter can be. And for that, we owe them a debt of gratitude.

Throwaway account. Ok I'm going to try and keep this as short as I can. I am a grown adult with an older brother (in his mid-40s) who has suffered from mental health and substance abuse issues for his entire adult life. To paint a quick profile: tormented the sh*t out of me growing up - non-stop teasing and ridicule, never graduated high school - suspensions, failing, skipping classes, smoking weed at a young age, kicked out of every high school he attended, started with street drugs (mostly opiates) and eventually moved onto prescription drugs, after my parents got divorced when he was 16 he lived with my dad for a while until he couldn't handle him and kicked him out.
He subsequently got kicked out of every place he ever lived, I think I counted 14 places at one point. Never had a job - my dad enabled his addiction by giving him money, giving him pills, driving him around, buying him things, etc. He has been in and out of rehab and various programs over the years but quickly relapsed after leaving or got kicked out before he completed the program for breaking rules, smuggling in substances, etc. I believe he has been diagnosed as bipolar and also as having a narcissistic personality disorder (that word gets thrown around a lot these days but he is a text book definition). He's on several different medications to 'manage' these conditions. I haven't spoken to him in a couple years. More on that below.
In 2017 Dad passed away and left him with a sizeable insurance policy - not seven figures but not very far off either. Everyone knew this was going to be a complete disaster and of course it was. He ignored everyone's pleading to not touch the money (and mocked and ridiculed everyone along the way) and instead endlessly made ridiculous purchases, ordered expensive food on a daily basis, made poor "investments", and in about 4 years he had wasted all of the money and became destitute. On top of that he got kicked out of the place he was living for not paying rent, threatening the landlord, etc. Since then he has been living in his car (which is now sold/gone), living on random people's couches (until he destroyed those relationships as well), in and out of hospitals claiming he needs to be admitted because of mental health issues which never works, and has spent nights on the street or fast food joints or wherever he can find shelter since he's basically homeless now. Of course all of this is everyone else's fault, he claims no responsibility for any of it.
While all of this is happening he has been harassing my mom to no end - sending text messages, voicemails, he also showed up at her door 2-3 times demanding that she let him live there, asking for money, and so forth. He threatens her constantly in vivid, horrific detail in text and voice notes. He has tried this with me as well but I have distanced myself completed by blocking him on every channel he tries to contact me on. He doesn't know where I live and has no other way to contact me. My mom continues to talk to him on a somewhat regular basis since his behaviour is inconsistent. She also has immense feelings of guilt and also fears that if she blocks him completely that it will only enrage him more and that he will come to her house to hurt her. Also, despite his pathetic behaviour she is still his mother. I can't possibly imagine what she is going through with this and it breaks my heart to even imagine it.
Ok so fast forward to a few weeks ago and he has been sleeping in a hospital washroom for several nights and eventually gets confronted by staff and they tell him he must leave or they are going to call the police. In his brilliance he tells them if they don't admit him that he's going to kill his mother (I suppose thinking that such an outlandish statement would get him admitted for mental health reasons and he'll have a place to stay). Instead the staff calls the police. When the police arrive they run his name and discover that there is a warrant for his arrest because a girl he was dating two years earlier reported him for harassment, assault, forcible confinement, and sending threatening messages - 10 criminal charges. The police arrest him and since he didn't have anyone to post bail for him (I refused, my mom refused) he spent about 2 weeks in prison.
He's now out of prison as of a few days ago and is required by the court to reside at a shelter until his court date. He hasn't missed a beat and is again sending my mom threatening messages and now me as well, I realized I hadn't blocked his email.
Ok I could go on but you get the picture. My issue is this - how do I support my mom while she is going through this? If I wasn't hearing about him through her I wouldn't even know what's going on in his life and honestly I wouldn't care much either. I realize that he is beyond help, I wish I could help him but this isn't the kind of person that can be saved, and that is a battle I need to fight within my own mind.
My mom is asking if I can call him and tell him to stop harassing her, just to show him we are a united front and to support her. I want to support my mom but I honestly don't see how this will be of any help at all. It feels like it will only emotionally and mentally exhaust me if I have to speak with him.
Sorry, this was a really long post. Would love to hear your thoughts. Thank you.

I just finished {Peaches & Honey: These Immortal Truths by R Raeta} and had to come straight here to rave about it!

Synopsis

Anna is a young, poor woman in England 1184, outcasted for her vitiligo. Struggling to survive on her own, she one day saves a girl in dire circumstances. This girl - actually a god in disguise - thanks her with the gift of a divine peach. Anna eats the entire thing, intrigued by its hollow center and lack of a seed. The peach grants Anna a gift: her wounds heal faster than they can kill her. But this gift comes with the challenges of outliving everyone she has ever known or will ever know. As the centuries pass, the only constant in her life is that her creator - Khiran - always returns to see her.

Review

The often-made comparison between this and The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue are very apt. That book is pretty polarizing, but I actually liked it quite a bit. However, I liked this one even better. This is the first book in a duology.
This book was excellent for a lot of different reasons:

• Beautiful, lyrical prose
• Anna is a deserving and kindhearted FMC, with not an ounce of sass or irony
• Khiran is an intriguing MMC, a powerful and somewhat depressed man who wishes to live in a world of Anna's creation
• Khiran's chemistry with Anna leaps off the page
• Lovely historical settings, cultures, time periods, and people give each chapter a fresh feel
• More character driven than plot driven, but with characters this great, that's a good thing
• Deeply romantic pining over centuries
• Third person POV

My only complaints about this book are quite minor:

• At some point, it does seem a little silly that Anna just so happens to experience many major world events that a freshman in high school would learn in history class. I mean, yeah she just so happens to be in London during Jack the Ripper and in the US during the Civil War and underground railroad and in Italy during the initial spread of the black plague and in Spain during the first circumnavigation of the world and expansion into the New World and in Boston during the Boston Tea Partyand she's in Germany leading up to WWII At some point those coincidences do seem improbable and very western-centric (only one chapter focuses on the east; a chapter on China and piracy).
• In addition, there are a 4-5 times in the story that anachronisms pop up that really stood out to me; calling the War of the Rebellion / War for Southern Independence the "American Civil War" in the 1860s just doesn't make sense. Referring to German LGBTQ+ people as "gay" in the 1930s when that term just didn't exist in that context then...

These complaints are very minor, however, because the prose is so beautiful and the characters are so wonderful to read about and experience all these different events through their eyes. The occassional incorrect, anachronistic word used every hundred pages or so is truly not a stumbling block to enjoying this book.
I couldn't put this book down and I am very eager for book 2 to come out in early June!

This book is for you if you like:

• Flowery, purple prose
• Slow burn romances
• Subtle, slow-moving fantasy elements
• Historical time periods
• Character-driven stories
• Mature, complex, deeply human characters
• The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue and/or wanted a kinder, more loving version of that book
• Books that are free on KU (and currently on sale if you wanna buy it)
• Stories where even minor characters feel like real humans
• Stories where the FMC is loved because of her genuine kindness rather than for her beauty or some inexplicable quality that draws others to her
• Books featuring insecurity due to feeling like an outsider
• A really cool take on magic / gods / powers that feels almost mythical

Quotes

That night, when she curls up under the blanket and lets the tears drip silently from her cheeks, she wonders how it’s possible to grieve the loss of something she never expected to have.

.

“What we want isn’t always what we need,” Eira says, setting the jar on the table before reaching out and setting her ancient hands on Anna’s shoulders. “Immortality is a fickle beast, dear girl. Stay too long in one place and you’ll rot there.” “But I’m happy—” “No,” she interrupts, “You’re not unhappy. It’s not the same.”

.

Truths are for those who can afford to live it, not for those struggling to find any bright spot of light in a world that casts them into darkness.

.

“It’s easy to be righteous, to be angry, when you weren’t there to see all the blood and misery that came before you,” he says. “Most of these soldiers will only ever see one war firsthand in their lifetime. The ones who survive will grow old and sit in front of their hearths and pass stories of this battle to their children and grandchildren. They’ll romanticize it. Sing praises of how bravely their battalion fought. They won’t speak of the squelch of their fellow friend and soldier’s blood in their boots, or the fear that painted every soldier’s face. Enemy and ally alike.”

I just finished {Peaches & Honey: These Immortal Truths by R Raeta} and had to come straight here to rave about it!

Synopsis

Anna is a young, poor woman in England 1184, outcasted for her vitiligo. Struggling to survive on her own, she one day saves a girl in dire circumstances. This girl - actually a god in disguise - thanks her with the gift of a divine peach. Anna eats the entire thing, intrigued by its hollow center and lack of a seed. The peach grants Anna a gift: her wounds heal faster than they can kill her. But this gift comes with the challenges of outliving everyone she has ever known or will ever know. As the centuries pass, the only constant in her life is that her creator - Khiran - always returns to see her.

Review

The often-made comparison between this and The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue are very apt. That book is pretty polarizing, but I actually liked it quite a bit. However, I liked this one even better. This is the first book in a duology.
This book was excellent for a lot of different reasons:

• Beautiful, lyrical prose
• Anna is a deserving and kindhearted FMC, with not an ounce of sass or irony
• Khiran is an intriguing MMC, a powerful and somewhat depressed man who wishes to live in a world of Anna's creation
• Khiran's chemistry with Anna leaps off the page
• Lovely historical settings, cultures, time periods, and people give each chapter a fresh feel
• More character driven than plot driven, but with characters this great, that's a good thing
• Deeply romantic pining over centuries
• Third person POV

My only complaints about this book are quite minor:

• At some point, it does seem a little silly that Anna just so happens to experience many major world events that a freshman in high school would learn in history class. I mean, yeah she just so happens to be in London during Jack the Ripper and in the US during the Civil War and underground railroad and in Italy during the initial spread of the black plague and in Spain during the first circumnavigation of the world and expansion into the New World and in Boston during the Boston Tea Partyand she's in Germany leading up to WWII At some point those coincidences do seem improbable and very western-centric (only one chapter focuses on the east; a chapter on China and piracy).
• In addition, there are a 4-5 times in the story that anachronisms pop up that really stood out to me; calling the War of the Rebellion / War for Southern Independence the "American Civil War" in the 1860s just doesn't make sense. Referring to German LGBTQ+ people as "gay" in the 1930s when that term just didn't exist in that context then...

These complaints are very minor, however, because the prose is so beautiful and the characters are so wonderful to read about and experience all these different events through their eyes. The occassional incorrect, anachronistic word used every hundred pages or so is truly not a stumbling block to enjoying this book.
I couldn't put this book down and I am very eager for book 2 to come out in early June!

This book is for you if you like:

• Flowery, purple prose
• Slow burn romances
• Subtle, slow-moving fantasy elements
• Historical time periods
• Character-driven stories
• Mature, complex, deeply human characters
• The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue and/or wanted a kinder, more loving version of that book
• Books that are free on KU (and currently on sale if you wanna buy it)
• Stories where even minor characters feel like real humans
• Stories where the FMC is loved because of her genuine kindness rather than for her beauty or some inexplicable quality that draws others to her
• Books featuring insecurity due to feeling like an outsider
• A really cool take on magic / gods / powers that feels almost mythical

Quotes

That night, when she curls up under the blanket and lets the tears drip silently from her cheeks, she wonders how it’s possible to grieve the loss of something she never expected to have.

.

“What we want isn’t always what we need,” Eira says, setting the jar on the table before reaching out and setting her ancient hands on Anna’s shoulders. “Immortality is a fickle beast, dear girl. Stay too long in one place and you’ll rot there.” “But I’m happy—” “No,” she interrupts, “You’re not unhappy. It’s not the same.”

.

Truths are for those who can afford to live it, not for those struggling to find any bright spot of light in a world that casts them into darkness.

.

“It’s easy to be righteous, to be angry, when you weren’t there to see all the blood and misery that came before you,” he says. “Most of these soldiers will only ever see one war firsthand in their lifetime. The ones who survive will grow old and sit in front of their hearths and pass stories of this battle to their children and grandchildren. They’ll romanticize it. Sing praises of how bravely their battalion fought. They won’t speak of the squelch of their fellow friend and soldier’s blood in their boots, or the fear that painted every soldier’s face. Enemy and ally alike.”

TLDR - Partner doesn't help with childcare & house, won't admit or talk about issues. Don't want to cheat but also considering it.
Background on my current relationship: Been in a relationship for over 15 years and have 1 child.
Since we had our child we've grown apart. When she was born he started sleeping in a different room, and although we're back in the same bed we don't have the same intimacy.
Our child is at school now and since she was born I have done 100% of bedtimes & night time waking, illness, play dates/parties, appointments, child care drop offs & pick ups. I do 98% of everything else childcare related and house titivation.
We both work full time but he works longer hours and always prioritises work over family. This means I'm left looking after our little girl most morning, evenings and weekends.
Before I was pregnant I had a really high sex drive but since I gave birth my sex drive is non-existent. I thought it would return after I gave up breastfeeding but that's been over a year and I'm still not interested. I occasionally agree to sex to try and rekindle what we've lost but also because I feel obliged.
I resent him and sometimes I'm not even sure I love him any more. I'm finding it really difficult to be interested in what he says and I'm easily irritated by things he's says or does.
I'm sick of hoping he'll change, cross at all the moments he's missing in his child's life and happier when it's just me and my baby girl.
We also have different parenting styles and have often disagreed but he's never there to begin with!
He will never talk to me about any of these issues & if I try to talk to him, he gets angry or stressed and will leave the room/house so I've given up. If he's not ready to step up or even acknowledge the issues, I want to ask him if he even wants to be a parent and give him an out. I just wish he'd acknowledge there is an issue and we can talk about it, even if that means working it out or ending it.
Only his opinion matters and he often dictates how things will be - from where toys can be, to being unable to help at night because him being fresh for work is more important. If he's still awake and our daughter wants something he will wake me up to deal with it. I can be exhausted from a whole day of childcare and he never thinks to come home from work early to give me break but he always manages it if he's got the gym or a social event.
If I show any other emotion but happy he blocks me out and won't talk to me about issues. He always turns things round and never discusses the real issue but blows up about small things. I sometimes think I'm treading on egg shells and feel like he's being an emotional blackmailer
I haven't been out in the evening since she was born because we can't afford a baby sitter very often and I'm embarrassed if he's in the house. The few times I'vr tried to go out he's called me to say she's woken up and when I get home she's alone crying and he's doing something like watching TV.
I honestly think he hates being a parent and uses work as an excuse. I also don't think he's even aware there's even a problem. He's such a selfish narcissist that he thinks a cuddle and a platitude will cut it when I need consistent regular help.
We also never go anything together because I'm either working or doing child & house care and he's either working or focusing on himself. He never offers to give me my own time and in the past 2 years has maybe only had his child on his own for less than half a day in total.
I don't want our little girl to grow up without a dad but I also feel like if we break up he shouldn't have any right to her. How can he look after her on his own when he's never put her to bed, doesn't even know what she likes to eat, has never picked her up from school on his own, or is never there to play with her?
A new guy started at work and he is very attractive. Initially it was innocent and I'd just lust after him from a distance. Then I noticed when he smiled at me his whole face would light up, and he'd look for excuses to be near me. If I was away from work he'd always ask where I was.
We started having lunch together, and then he asked for my number with the pretence of making lunch plans in advance. I knew I was in trouble when he'd text me before I got back to my desk but soon we were texting regularly and he's asked me to have an affair.
I already know the texting is bad and I'm in emotional affair territory and know I shouldn't take it any further but here I am; one minute thinking no, I don't want to destroy my family, and the next actively considering it. Him even asking has made me seriously assess my relationship and realise I'm not happy with the status quo.
I don't see how to get my current relationship to improve and I'm genuinely considering being a cheat. Help!

9-minute read.

France welcomes the latest round of negotiations between foreign ministers of Armenia and Azerbaijan in Kazakhstan

FM Mirzoyan said the negotiations in Kazakhstan were held in a constructive environment and referred to the statement made after the meeting.
PARIS: France stresses the importance of both sides confirming their commitment to the Almaty Protocol of 1991 and to mutual recognition of each other’s territorial integrity as the core of this process, following the quadripartite meeting in Prague on 7 October 2022.
France calls to continue the delimitation of the border on the basis of the principles agreed in the declaration of April 19, 2024, and as an extension of the first demarcation work carried out on the ground. At the same time, it calls for continuing discussions with a view to signing a peace treaty between the two countries.
France welcomes the initiative of the Kazakh authorities to facilitate the holding of these talks.
France continues to work together with its partners to establish just and solid peace in the South Caucasus in accordance with international law. //
source, source, source, source,

OSCE: Reaching stable and comprehensive peace between Armenia and Azerbaijan remains a priority for us

OSCE Chair-in-Office Ian Borg visited Armenia on Monday.
BORG: The only way to ensure comprehensive and stable peace is through diplomacy. The steps made towards border delimitation between Armenia and Azerbaijan are the actions needed to reach peace. //
Pashinyan and Borg discussed the AM-OSCE cooperation and the peace talks.
BORG: The OSCE is committed to supporting stable peace, solving all conflicts in the OSCE area, and applying the organization’s mandate to ensure regional peace and stability. //
source, source,

opposition activists detained and released after briefly shutting down several streets in Yerevan

Last week the protest organizers, led by Archbishop Bagrat and MPs representing pro-Russian parties, called for strikes and road closures on Monday. They demand PM Pashinyan's resignation. The opposition parties have not yet disclosed when they plan to launch the impeachment process in the parliament. They likely have the minimum number of MPs to launch the impeachment but they'd still need dozens of ruling party MPs to join them for the motion to succeed, which is unlikely.
On Monday over 170 people were detained and released after blocking roads, including with the use of trash cans and hay. A red beret pushed a journalist out of his way while running up the stairs, sending him to the ground. Another journalist fainted during a clash between police and protesters. In the morning, Yandex Maps showed the traffic congestion in Yerevan at Level 5 on a scale of 1-10, a "usual workday".
In one instance, an angry driver got out of his car and pushed the trash can out of the street, while other cars proceeded to drive through the sparse group of protesters. Video.
ARF MP Garnik Danielyan, a co-organizer of the protest, engaged in a dispute with a driver. The angry driver told the MP to go "siktir", while the MP called him "chatlax". Video.
One protester suggested catching and "putting down" police officers one by one while they are alone, "because they feel good in large numbers." Video.
A psychotic incident was recorded between a protester and a bystandedriver who was presumably trying to open the road. The protester hit the man and called him "Nikol's trash". The police intervened to push the protesters out of the road.
During an encounter between a protester and one resident, the protester asked the latter if he was a Christian:
PROTESTER: Քրիստոնյա՞ ես
RESIDENT: Հա
PROTESTER: Հա ու համփ արա [suck my dick]
The resident pushes the protester, and the protester spits on him. Several people got off the buses and urged the protesters to leave or to "go protect the borders" instead. The red berets arrived within minutes and removed the trash cans and the small number of protesters from the road. video, video, video,
While the ARF has long been viewed as the voice of diaspora, other movements have emerged to challenge its dominance. The Armenian Movement of France has organized a change.org petition that calls to encourage Armenia's independence and Euro-Atlantic integration, to keep the church and state separate, and not take any destabilizing actions.
KHURSHUDYAN: They [ARF and protest organizers] are attempting to convince the diaspora to join them by influencing various organizations like the Lemkin Institute. It is strange that the Lemkin Institute released a statement accusing PM Pashinyan's Genocide statement of containing "victim blaming" only now, during these protests, several weeks after Pashinyan made that statement. It took a lot of effort for these forces to lobby and create the impression that the diaspora as a whole is on their side. //
The BEVER (Sasna Tsrer) party leaders said they are cooperating with the pro-Russian former regime parties but only on the issues of removing Pashinyan and stopping the border delimitation process.
BEVER (Ara Papyan): If Pashinyan resigns now and pro-Russian forces win the elections democratically, it will be the population's fault, not ours. // video
As you know from Sunday news digest, the pro-Russian forces and a group of ex-diplomats led by Kocharyan's Foreign Minister Vardan Oskanian, are against using the 1991 Almaty declaration as the basis for delimitation. Foreign Minister Mirzoyan was asked to comment on Monday.
MIRZOYAN: The Deputy PMs of Armenia and Azerbaijan, who are in charge of border commissions, have come to an agreement to launch the delimitation process taking into account the 1991 Almaty Declaration. This was welcomed by numerous states and international organizations. The foreign diplomats you mentioned are deserters who fled their duties while Armenia was under physical attack in 2021. I can no longer treat them seriously. That is the most civil language I can use toward them. In reality, by torpedoing the Almaty Declaration and the peace process based on Almaty, these ex-diplomats continue to torpedo the sovereignty, statehood, and territorial integrity of Armenia. In the best-case scenario, they do this without understanding, and in the worst-case scenario, they are following the orders of a foreign state. I don't have further comments. //
Archbishop Bagrat Galstanyan said they will not hold daily meetings at Republic Square anymore, and that smaller gatherings will be held near the St. Anna church every evening to wrap up the day and discuss future plans. Yesterday Arman Babajanyan revealed a meeting between church officials. On Monday, Archbishop Galstanyan confirmed that he indeed met Catholicos on Sunday. Galstanyan was asked whether he plans to "transfer" the "leadership" of the movement to political parties. He said he is open to that idea: "Թող գան, վերցնեն, ով ցանկանում է:"
source, source, source, source, source, source, source, source, source, source, source, source, source,

Executive Vice President of the European Commission for Economic Affairs, the EU Trade Commissioner, will visit Armenia this week

Valdis Dombrovskis will meet Armenian and EBRD officials and take part in an annual meeting of the EBRD Board of Governors.
source, source,

PM Pashinyan is in Denmark for the "Copenhagen Democracy Summit"

Nikol Pashinyan will take part in the discussion on “From the frontline: Armenia’s defense of democracy.”
source,

Armenia will bring its consumer protection legislation in line with European standards

The head of Armenia's Competition Protection Commission visited Poland to participate in ICPEN (International Consumer Protection and Enforcement Network).
They spoke about unfair business practices and how to combat them, online taxi service regulations, online casinos, discounting policies used by businesses, etc.
GEVORGYAN: Armenia is going through an important phase in terms of protecting the interests of consumers. Discussions are underway to align Armenia's consumer protection legislation with EU standards. It is necessary to use digital technologies and train skilled experts in this field.
source,

Russia begins withdrawing border agents near the border village Nerkin Hand: residents

The villagers noticed that the Russian soldiers were no longer observing the traffic from the observation post and that they were packing some of their stuff.
source, source,

anti-corruption: Patrol Police officer is charged with accepting a bribe from a driver

INTERIOR MINISTRY: In early March, two officers pulled over an Indian driver on Kievyan St. One of the officers demanded a ֏20,000 bribe to ignore the fact that the vehicle didn't pass a tech inspection. They negotiated it down to ֏7,000. The officer was charged with felony bribery. He confessed. The case is in court. //
source,

Yerevan Mayor Avinyan had a lightbulb moment

The city has purchased 6,000 LED lights producing 4000K white light. Mayor Avinyan instructed the department to install them only on roads and to purchase weaker 3000K bulbs for condo backyards in order not to disrupt sleep.
Last month the city replaced 8.6 kilometers of cables. The Mother Armenia statue and the Opera building will have new գեղարվեստական lighting.
source, source, video,

Yerevan implements GIS (geographic information system) to collect data from various sources and make targeted decisions based on visualized data: VIDEO

MAYOR AVINYAN: The Municipality and all the district offices are switching to a new management style with the introduction of GIS. Every department will join it, phase by phase. We are talking about digital maps which we must learn to use. This is going to significantly simplify some of the work done by departments.
OFFICIAL: This is part of the digitization strategy. This unified GIS platform will collect information from the cadastre, transport, Active Citizen app, utility services, construction, etc., and make them accessible in one place. The visual data allow us to carry out analysis and make fact-based decisions.
For example, we created a cadastre GIS by using a satellite image as the base layer, then integrated it with the cadastre database. This map shows in detail the boundaries of properties, the purpose and status of each land plot, etc.
Another example is a map of air pollution, prior records, and analytical tools.
The GIS map for the Active Citizen app allows us to see the submissions and the completed work, their locations on the map, and how well the city responds to issues reported by citizens. You can filter the issues by category. For example, you can show only the reports about illegal dumping, click on the report and see the image shared by the citizen, then click to see the status and the outcome of city's response. The tools allow you to analyze the data and the performance rate.
Another map shows the 3D image of the city with its buildings and green areas. Here we can calculate the capacity of bus stops, etc. Drones can be used to create a very detailed digital 3D copy of specific buildings.
You can click on a land plot and it'll pull up the ownership information, the permit records, etc.
Connecting two dots shows you the altitude differences and other data that you can use, for example, during the installation of irrigation pipes.
This is less than 1% of its potential. We plan to train employees next week.
MAYOR AVINYAN: We should make some of this data public, like the air quality map or certain maps that did not require financial resources to create [քձիբ խոզ]. This is a revolutionary change in the municipality. We need to speed up the work with the use of digital tools.
video,

Yerevan begins planting hundreds of adult "high-value" trees and thousands of bushes near the new promenade/park around the Yerevanyan Lake: VIDEO

video,

Central Bank chief was invited to Parliament to discuss economy and expenditures

MP: Regarding CB's report on the efficiency of service vehicles used by state agencies. The state buildings scheduled to receive solar panels should also be equipped with EV chargers so the service vehicles can use the energy generated by the panels. I requested information from Yerevan Municipality about the service vehicle expenditures and it shows that EVs are not only cheaper because of electricity, but also because they are overall more affordable to maintain. We are talking about large savings.
CB CHIEF: Our estimates show that EVs are 2x-3x more affordable compared to combustion engine vehicles, even if we factor in all the adjacent expenses. In Yerevan, we have [state] buildings with solar panels on roofs but [connecting them to EV chargers in the parking lot] will be very difficult because these are old and sometimes "historical" buildings. They also have problems with air conditioning, plumbing, etc. At the same time, we are trying to implement this solar panel project in the newer buildings, for example, in Dilijan, where we have EV chargers for service vehicles in the parking lots.
video,

Central Bank chief spoke about the deflation in Q1

RULING MP: It is great for our residents' pockets that the prices have fallen but what is its effect on the economy and exports? What is the best inflation rate to maintain a "balance"?
CB CHIEF: During the discussions with our colleagues from IMF, regarding regional and global events, we agreed that countries develop when the inflation is low and manageable. It encourages investments. In this regard, the overall microeconomic stability and the fiscal policy of Armenia create a very good environment for this predictability. This is one of our "cards" in our relations with foreign entities.
During each CB session, we discuss several market and inflation scenarios. Under one scenario there is a risk of inflation becoming too high, while under other scenarios it could remain low. We are trying to find the most balanced option and thank God we have been able to continuously lower the [refinancing] rates, which helps the state. //
Ըստ զեկուցողիդրամավարկային քաղաքականության ծրագրում ներկայացվող սցենարների համաձայն 2024 թվականի կարճաժամկետ հորիզոնում գնաճը կպահպանվի նպատակային ցուցանիշից ցածր մակարդակում` տարեվերջին այն կկազմի 1,3%-1,5%:
video, source,

Central Bank chief spoke about the refinancing rate, the rate at which the state borrows from banks, copper prices, etc.

video,

how did the family of Ilham Aliyev's security chief obtain so many properties in the United Kingdom?

Offshore companies owned by Eyyubov’s wife and daughter spent $114 million on real estate in the United Kingdom. The family, including Eyyubov himself, also own over $46 million in properties in Dubai.

OCCRP report,

growing concerns in Abkhazia that Putin might have secretly "sold" them to Georgia as a confederation in exchange for Georgia's neutrality between West and Russia

video,